2 comments/ 10413 views/ 0 favorites Pearl Creek By: Bryce3D Why is this woman looking at me? I don't think of myself as that interesting and it is making me nervous. She may be the most beautiful thing I have ever seen but why must she watch me. She looks interested even... I look away from her eyes nervously. Do I know her? There is something familiar... "How are you Alex?" "Good uh who are...?" "Nicky... remember me?" She cuts me off. Memories rush into my head of a cute girl wearing braces with black hair and sparkling green eyes. Nicky... yes I knew her, she had inhabited my fantasies at about grade nine, and it had been hard to concentrate in any of the classes we shared. It would have mean a lot if she had talked to me then. I take another sip of my coffee contemplating by gone frustrations. "Hello?" "Oh sorry yes, yeah Nicky I haven't seen you around for..." "...Five years? Yeah we moved away." She cuts me off again. "How have you been?" She says tilting her head to the side slightly and smiling brightly. I contemplate. "Alex you aren't any more talkative." "It would be better if I didn't think about what I was going to say?" I return as blood pumps through my face. Nicky gets up from the clean white chair and walks to my table on the deck of a small café. As she stands I can't prevent my eyes from evaluating her and all her new curves. The years have turned her from an adorable teenager into an amazing woman, cute shapely and lean. "So?" She goads superciliously at my cup which masks my face as I take another thoughtful sip of coffee from the bottom. "Have you had enough time thinking?" "Good." I reply intentionally shortly trying to bother her for putting me on the spot. "And how have you been Nicky?" I add trying to put her on the spot instead of me. "Not all that great" she says frowning honestly and looking concerned. A gust of cool morning air moves a few stray hairs escaping from her neat bun across her head. "Yeah it is the same for me, nothing great these days. It is so isolated around here I almost never meet new people, it is all the same hard work." I move my cup thoughtfully. "Where are you working?" "...The mine." My head lowers a bit; somehow I know this answer is going to disappoint her. "...But you are so smart." She replies kindly fulfilling my expectations exactly. "Not really if I was so smart I would be doing better things, but what of you?" I add. "My grandmother died that's why I came back." Her clear round face and shining bright eyes were really starting to get to me and I looked down at the table. "I am going to order another coffee, I'll get you one too while I am there if you like?" I said getting up and still looking at the table. The shiny hardwood floor pops beneath my feet as I step into a short cue. Looking out the window I see Nicky in her world sitting in the sunshine. She is small and pale through the window almost elfin but for her pinkness. A short elderly, grumpy looking Italian man gets me a cup of coffee and some iced Chai. I realise at some level her choice of beverage disappoints me, was she in Oregon or California these past years? Americans I distrust, I see this as a personal weakness. My father was an American I know his family and they are good people. I may paint a whole nation for unfair trade policy and obnoxious tourists. I am self analytical it is part of my introverted nature to try to understand where my feelings begin. "Thank you" she says receiving her beverage her soft hand brushing against mine as it is transferred. Her honest appreciation at so small an act makes me nervous. "No worries." I reply braving a smile and trying to look at her kindly. She stares straight at me for a moment and I look away involuntarily. "You should smile more" she laughs. "Why is that?" I retort. "You have great smile." I attempt a warning look as I try to think of another reason she would compliment me like that short of a genuine romantic interest. "Fine don't believe me then, but you are a really good looking guy." She says bravely to her cup. I can't help but blush I have been holding it back for a while and I look down. My mind runs over ways to return the compliment without overtly compromising myself or being cliché. There was a deep sadness in her that she was trying to drown in optimism, it attracted me in a paternal way and made my heart ach. I couldn't tell exactly why I know this and I didn't trust it entirely. "You know years ago you were there was this girl, the most beautiful girl I had ever seen." I speak slowly trying hard not to stutter or trip over my words. She was on the verge of cutting me off but a shot a warning looked hard at her silently conveying the words "Shut up". "Every night before bed I would vow to smile at her and tell her how pretty I thought she was. In the morning I, uh I would... forget. She went away while I was still procrastinating and I spent months regretting not saying what I, uh I wanted to. Years later I met her on a perfect day in July... I met her again and I get the opportunity to tell her that she is smart, perfect and beautiful like she always was but it is no longer true." Despite the effort the whole thing sounds silly to me and I get this drowning feeling. The pain in her eyes as I say this burns to my heart. I realise that I am inflicting pain on her by telling her this for my own unjustified reciprocal reasons. Or maybe I want to know if she really cares. "I..."she starts with the genesis of tears glistening in the bottom of her dark eyes, I cut her off. "She is no longer beautiful like she was; she is much more so... you look beautiful." I feel stupid and silly hiding behind my little story. The humiliation and confusion torture me. She sits there looking quietly at the table. We both stare at our table not daring to move or to speak. "I am sorry" I finally have the nerve to say, getting ready to get up from the table. "Please stay." She says seriously looking into my eyes. "I felt the same way" she admits heavily. Trees swish in the warm breeze around us, long minutes pass and we begin to relax a bit. "Ever have iced Chai?" she offers enthusiastically. I silently accept her beverage by holding out my hand and surrounding the cool beverage with my fingers. I lift it slowly to my mouth and take a long sip trying hard to enjoy the creamy cool liquid as it pours past my teeth and bathes my tongue. It is spicy and refreshing, an experience to drink. "Good?" she smiles laughing in her eyes at my obvious unfeigned pleasant surprise. "Yeah it's good, thanks." "My grandmother and I used to come here for this..." "I'm sorry, she was a great person." I reply genuinely. "You knew her?" She returns disbelieving, her eyes wider. "I knew her, I did volunteer work in the park shortly after you left she organised the clean up. We called her Jenna she was fun to work with that was partly why I volunteered." "...And the other part?" Nicky says apparently trying to change the subject from her grandmother. "Volunteer work has its rewards, there are worse ways to spend an afternoon than relaxing and picking up trash in the park." Nicky looks doubtfully at me; again there is a comfortable pause and I appreciate her being there. "Do you have plans for this fine day?" She says smiling innocently. "I have a little job to do sometime in the next hour or so that's why I am down here in town here actually." "I'll be in the park reading all morning." "Does that mean you want me come by and distract you?" She answers deliberately as if she knew exactly what I was going to say before I even thought it and spent the time I was articulating formulating her response. "Yeah that's what I mean." As I step onto the sidewalk I think of the encounter in retrospect. What a disaster, I am such an idiot. I can't stop thinking about meeting Nicky in the park and at the same time I dread ever seeing her again. I think of the things I said and the more I think about it the more I feel that I am a jerk. I briskly walk up the street away from the river and turn onto a less used avenue that is so well populated with trees that it nearly looks overgrown. Five teenage girls stand in a circle, a tall oriental speaks softly and a short one with blond hair answers back "what?" sharply over and over again. I replay the whole conversation at the café several times and every time I rethink what I should have said until it sounds good to me. Everything seems strange and unreal as though some drug has made the world sharper more colourful and louder for me all of a sudden. I automatically open a gate in a weathered white picket fence on my right and walk up to the door of a warn looking Victorian house. I pound with my fist hard on the doorframe so that I won't leave marks on the softer wood of the door and at the same time I send shockwaves through the house that the occupant would feel if she doesn't hear. I wait listening carefully for movement; I hear steps on two flights of stairs. A stocky middle aged woman with dark grey hair answers the door sleepily. "Good morning Alex if you had come earlier I would have still been asleep." Her voice is high pitched and she speaks with a lisp that softens her T's and makes her seem far younger than she is. "On top of the mowing today there is something I would like you to help me with if you feel up to it." I feel like conquering the world. "I'll do my best Liz." "My computer isn't working very well and I would like you to have a look at it and see if there is anything you can do, of course I will pay extra." "I'll have a look." I reply unenthusiastically, my confidence deflating. In my experience messing with computers is a sure plea for frustration and headache. "It is 10:30." Liz says indicating politely that she is going to pay for my time starting now. A refreshing gust of wind blows past me whispering in the grass as I step over uneven lumps of weeds and cooch grass towards a dilapidated matching garden shed that flanks the house. The sliding door leans precariously at a diagonal allowing free access to the contents of the shed. I stumble over miscellaneous hoses and garden paraphernalia and stand for a moment letting my eyes adjust to the dim light. I pick up a simple but powerful lawnmower by grabbing the deck front and back. I carry the mower over the debris and duck under the partially collapsed door, reaching back into the shed for a rag and a jerry can that are just inside next to the wall. Liz insists that I check the oil every time I mow and I do this obediently even though I changed the oil a few mowings ago and checked it every time since. No change. I press the primer three times and pull the handle, the mower obediently starts and I adjust the throttle slightly. I trudge along pushing the mower slowly in front of me fighting it over the uneven yard stopping occasionally to let it digest a mound of cooch. One side of the yard I mow in rows, the other I mow around in ever shrinking squares just to fend off monotony. I am impatient; I think of Nicky constantly and long to sit down in some cool shade in the park. Sweating and feeling hungry I return the mower to the shed and walk into the house via the prominent veranda in the back through some ornate glass doors. "The computer is in the corridor at the top of the stairs." Liz's childish voice rings through the dining room from the kitchen. After taking my shoes off I walk up to the top of the stairs. I sit in a comfortable computer Chair that is adjusted to around my height and press the power switch noting that it is an ATX single position switch. I listen for the familiar BIOS POST beep and am comforted when it chimes and grey letters start filing onto the screen. Windows loads rather slowly and after the desktop appears icons start popping up endlessly next to the time on the bottom right. A few explorer windows pop up displaying graphic scenes pornography. One of the scenes show a couple standing with the woman raising her leg in such a way that the picture clearly shows her vagina with the man's abnormally large penis penetrating only as far as the head there in. I click the x to close the window. Thoughts rush through my mind. "Has Liz seen these? Does Liz look for porn? Is that the reason for all this spy ware?" I add it all together never accepting any of the conclusions. The next picture shows an ugly skinny teenager choking on an enormous dick. Click it is gone. The next exhibits an anime riding with a painful expression; a crude rendition of white fluids run from her pussy down the cock she is sliding down. Click. ...A pretty black woman with a disinterested white guy pounding into her doggy style. Click. A drunken looking redhead covered in cum. Click. ...A beautiful young woman with jet black hair masturbates herself with her hand while a man behind her seems to be pushing his large dick into her asshole. Cli... the bottom falls off my world and reality leaks out. The last picture is still etched in my memory even though it is gone from the screen, it was Nicky. I swallow hard feeling sick; a moment ago my day was surreal now I am on a different planet with a high fever. Blood rushes through my face and I stare up at the ceiling, my head is spinning. Weekly I try to convince myself that it was my imagination. "Ok... back to work" I mumble audibly trying to concentrate on the task at hand after staring blankly at the screen for an indefinable length of time. I use the CTR-ALT-DEL combo and kill explorer and all the strange programmes I can identify as unnecessary. Then I restart explorer and set in the internet options to use blank as the default website, I also delete all the cookies the history and offline files. I open explorer and download an anti spy ware programme and run it. I do this all mechanically I feel like I am watching myself work. After rebooting a few times and not noticing any problems I shut the computer down satisfied and head down the stairs. "I think that fixed it." I say weakly walking into the kitchen. "Thanks Alex how can I prevent it from getting bogged down like that in future." Liz says smoothly without discomfort that I can tell. "Be cautious while browsing the web." I say weakly. "You have no idea what trouble you can find out there... by accident." I add to her floor. "Ok that will be $20 for the lawn and $15 for the computer." "Oh, that's not necessary. Just glad I could help." I answer typically. "And the computer only took a few moments" I add as an afterthought. "You were up there more than an hour." "I spent most of the time looking at the ceiling." "He-he you are a strange one but you will just have to settle for $35." Liz's sing song voice chides as she fills out a cheque. "I also made you some lunch; a few sandwiches and cookies don't make me feel bad by making me think you don't want them." "Thank you." My mouth waters as I take the bag in my left hand and the cheque in my right. I walk through the un-kept garden to the back alley while folding the cheque and tucking it into the front pocket of my jeans. The alley drops steeply down towards the river and then around a couple tight bends shaking off the last of the houses, bracken crowds it down to a trail and it heads towards the park along the river. ...As I walk battles raged within me. Anger burns at me; I was angry at Nicky for being disappointed in me, the hypocrite. Pity and fear welled up within me at the same time tying a knot in my throat. The pity was the part of me that didn't blame her but understood her desperation and whatever people had convinced her of to get her to do what they wanted. The fear was for me and what I didn't know or understand about Nicky. A rusty chain fence appears beside me letting me know that I am in the park and I realise that my heart is beating hard against my chest and my breath is choked in my throat so I decide to sit a while before pursuing her. I concentrate on breathing for a while feeling the air rush past my upper lip and fill my lungs. Breath in, breath out relax... relax. Finally my head clears and I stand up and walk into a broad clearing with a baseball diamond on one side and a soccer field in the middle. It slowly becomes a grove of maple trees at the other end with wrought iron benches and picnic tables in the shade. I barely make out a small dark form stretched out on one of the benches and taking a deep breath I head out from under the trees into the full light of mid day across the field. As I draw nearer I see that she is lying on her back with a pillow propping her head and her legs bent at a ninety degree angle her feet tucked under the ironwork. "You are late" she interrupts me before I even open my mouth as I approach the bench. "How can I be late I didn't even say that I would come?" Nicky looks up at me with a distant look in her eyes and I see that she has augmented her face with dark but expertly applied makeup and let her hair down. A strong scent of perfume blows past me with a gust of breeze. The effect would probably be considered attractive by most men, I am not most men and to me it looks like scribbling on the Mona Lisa. "What have you done to your face?" Her distant look focuses a flash of pain then anger. "You sure are charming; I wonder that you are single." Her sarcasm seems only half serious. In an effort to diffuse my comment about her makeup I lighten up a bit. "Actually I know of only one woman that would even talk to me again, I guess my charms didn't work on her." "Maybe she just saw through you, besides three is the charm and you aren't there yet." A feisty look flashes in her green eyes and she smiles crookedly. "I am not worrying about that too much; I think she is crazy about me." I say impulsively trying to sound arrogant. Nicky throws her book down and stands up. "Sounds like you want to fight." She says mischievously and tackles me taking out my underpinnings with ease and sends me tumbling down onto the grass. As I fall my lunch falls from my hand. I snag her ankle pulling her down with me into the grass I hear her giggle softly. She rolls me off her using her momentum but I launch off the ground quickly and tackle her legs and pin her gently. I laugh hard at her chest as she struggles under my strong grasp. A standing valve for sprinklers is now just within reach and I grab it turning it and letting water gush into the grass beside her head splattering her face with cold water. "Ahhh stop it!" she screams. I relax my grip on her shoulder. Quickly she slips out from under me while at the same time shoving me hard against the valve post soaking my head. She runs across the field towards the baseball diamond laughing hysterically; she runs with her arms tucked in and balanced like she runs often. I sprint after her and as I catch up I grab a handful of her hair and pull just hard enough for her to know I have her. "No fair" she gasps dropping to her knees and rolling onto her back as I let go of her hair. I grab her hand to keep her from running off again. "Cheater" she glares at me thickly; a feigned sullen look. "That isn't a cheat" I gasp back, "that is an exploit". Nicky's chest heaves and I watch it rise and fall in awe, she looks so alive and wonderful. "Are you staring at my tits?" There is real indignation in her voice. It wasn't until that moment that I actually really noticed the round, soft looking mounds on her chest. "I was watching you breath." "Is that interesting?" "It was." "Now?" "Now I am staring at your tits." I say as blandly as I can. Nicky howls with spontaneous laughter and I have no choice but to join her. Without releasing her hand I get up and help pull her to her feet. I hold her hand tightly and start walking to the bench where I dropped my food. Pearl Creek "Are you going to let me go?" "I don't think so." "Why?" "Because you might run away again, you run pretty fast I might not catch you again." "What if I promise I wont." "Never?" "You are really a very silly man you know that? Fine I promise I will never leave you. Is that what you wanted to hear?" "Shake on it." I tease shaking the hand I am still holding twice firmly and then I open my hand to let her go. "Are you going to let me go?" She hasn't removed her hand from mine. "Nah it feels good." She smiles brightly. We separate when she sits down on the bench and I walk over and turn off the burbling valve, and then I reach down and pick up my somewhat crumpled bag of lunch sit on the grass and begin to examine the contents. "Feel like a cucumber sandwich?" I offer. "Mmm hmm." She answers and I thoughtfully pull out a large homemade bun that is well filled with finely chopped cucumbers and cream cheese. "Wow that is a huge cucumber sandwich." "Yeah I think she made the cucumber part in a food processor." "A big food processor, what did you have to do to get this food?" All of a sudden the horrible revelation from this morning floods back into my mind. "I mowed her yard." I say quietly trying to convince myself that was all I had done this morning. "Compliments of Ms Elizabeth Banner." I elaborate at the second sandwich as I take a bite out of it. "I believe she thinks I am a miner." I say between bites. "You aren't? But you said you were." "I said I worked at the mine. I do. I shovel slag." "You are too smart for that job Alex." "How do you know I'm so smart, what else could I do?" "You were really good with computers in school." "Not really besides I haven't kept up with that sort of thing since I graduated really I am obsolete". "So how did it go today?" Involuntarily I look at Nicky all of a sudden and spot a knowing gleam in her eye. I chew thoughtfully for a few moments. "I am staying with Liz actually I asked her about you. She said you were still around, that you mowed her yard occasionally. She asked me if I knew anything about computers I don't so I told her to talk to you. I even got her to call you, I figured her yard could use some work and I wanted to see a familiar face. So... what was up with her computer?" There is a moments pause as I re-evaluate where I stand. "Spy ware, I think it is more common these days. I had to search online for anti spy ware tools because I was so out of date." "And that means her computer was running slowly?" "And misbehaving" I reply ironically. "Misbehaving? Computers can misbehave?" "Yeah as usual the homepage had changed into a porn site with a bunch of stupid pop-ups attached to it." As I say the word porn I see a brief shudder pass through Nicky, for some reason a get a sudden surge of anger. "You say my job is so beneath me you must have some rewarding work." I see her blush deeply and look away. "I am unemployed." "I worked in a warehouse stacking boxes for a while then in a greenhouse..." "That explains her strength and balance" my mind tells me. "Not all that social yourself eh." I say. "People suck." I raise an eyebrow at her seriousness. "I admit they are a pain but they are our species." I reply. I feel angry and frustrated with this woman but I also felt I needed to be open and honest. "I saw a picture that looked like you... on a porn site while I was cleaning up Liz's computer." The words reverberate in the air and then fly off with the next breath of air leaving nothing but absolute silence. I can remember when my father came home one day laid off broke and drunk. We had had barely enough money to eat before. The shame in his face is permanently etched on my memory and what I saw in Nicky's eyes eclipsed that. Nicky stood up and turned to walk a way a hand on her cheek. "No don't, you promised." I blurt stupidly as I jump to my feet and grab her shoulders. She tries to shrug me off but I hold on. "Let me go." Nicky sobs. "Nicky I am really sorry." "What are you sorry for?" She growls angrily. "I am sorry for acting like an idiot and humiliating you." I hold my arms around her shoulders as she begins to sob I feel convulsions rise up from her diaphragm. "Please Nicky don't go." Slowly almost reluctantly she turns around and pushes her cheek into my chest, tears stream down her face. I pet her hair and rock her from side to side slowly. "I wanted to be in a movie... I wanted to be a star... I, I made a lot of money. I was terrified initially then it started to get easier. Eventually I had to pretend to feel anything at all." Nicky sobs and then speaks into me it's almost like I hear her with my heart. Her grip slowly increases around my waist. "You are going to hate me aren't you?" Her voice whines into the core of me between her sobs. "Nicky look at me, hold your head up so I can see your eyes... there." I brush a strand of black hair off her forehead. Her face is chaos, rain has splattered her makeup and tears have spread dark eyeliner down her cheeks she almost looks like a clown. "Listen I don't hate you now I never have and never will. Do you believe me?" Nicky nods sheepishly. She looks at my blue grey shirt and sees a wet black smudge where her face had been and looks at the ground. "Sorry about your shirt" she says in a small voice still staring at the ground. "It is an old shirt anyway; it even has holes in it. In fact why don't you have it you can use it to wash your face if you like." After flipping through all the little wooden buttons I shrug off the shirt and hand it to her I still have a white undershirt and in the warmth of the day I am more comfortable." Thoughtfully I go back to finishing off the sandwich I had started earlier while she scrubs her face at the standing valve. I wonder if she can enjoy sex anymore, I wonder why I like her so damn much and if she is going to ruin me. I feel I should trust her but I don't trust my own feelings. Nicky steps back to the bench and sits gracefully, her face clear bright and beautiful her familiar smile back, maybe all she needed was to let go a little. I wonder at how she managed to clean her face up so well, I studied drama in high school and found getting makeup off with water was like trying to get axel grease off with water. From where I am sitting on the grass in front of her I can also see that the water has run off her face and wetted the front of her shirt so that I can see the outline of her bra through her black T-shirt. I watch intently as she continues to eat her sandwich, she watches me back looking quizzical. Her jaw moves smoothly as she eats the soft food and her cheeks bulge just a little bit when she takes a bite. "What's wrong with you?" She asks between bites still looking at me with the same quizzical expression. "What do you mean?" I am genuinely confused by her question does she think I have a disease or something. "Do you have a terminal disease? Why is it that you are so weird, you seem fascinated by things that I do that are so... mundane. Are you gay? You don't even seem interested in sex." She says loudly exasperated her voice nearly breaking on sex. "As far as I know I am healthy, as far as I know I am not gay. I don't often get the opportunity to watch beautiful woman do things like eat and breath without them getting pissed off and leaving so to me it isn't mundane. I really am interested in sex but I am fairly certain that most couples save that sort of thing for at least the second date; I can be that patient at least. Besides as you know as well as I do I am unmotivated and snappish." "How many second dates do you get?" She asks with her crooked smile. She puts quotes around the second dates with her fingers. "Actually I have never had a second date." I imitate her quote. "I was talking about sex Alex" she condescends. "So was I" I answer dryly. "Really?" Disbelief stabs from her green eyes. "Look around you, this place exports young women; there is no future here that's why your parents left isn't it. Besides as you may have noticed I have a habit of scaring them off." "We must do something about this Alex." She reply's seriously thinking ahead of me like before. My heart skips a beat or two. "So you wan-want a second date?" I am actually terrified and I suspect it shows. "This is our second date remember?" She goads. "No this morning at the café doesn't count; it was a chance meeting not a date." "Oh I suppose it was" Nicky looks distantly at a cloud. "Ok how about we go for a second date to your place." My heart jumps in my throat. "Ok, tomorrow perhaps?" "What are you doing for dinner Alex?" "I was going to eat at home" Her voice cuts into mine just as I start. "You were going to eat at home. What about tonight?" "Ok." Nicky finishes eating the sandwich (an impressive feat) leisurely. I put a hand on her foot and she slips her foot out of her flip-flop and I squeeze it and then message it as we both stare at clouds for a while. "Nicky?" "Yes?" "Can I... would you...? I mean do you want to kiss me?" "Cute, Alex I didn't know you had it in you, sure." I could feel her smile despite that I was looking at her knees. I go back to looking at clouds. "Alex you're doing it again." "What?" "Losing focus aren't we, get up here." I look up at her face smiling above me it shines warmth at me like the sun. I climb onto the bench close beside her and wrap an arm around her shoulders. Now I look down on her a little. She looks straight up into my eyes. She looks at me with kindness in her eyes and just a hint of fear. I lean slightly forward and I feel her lips against mine. They tighten into a smile as I stay exactly in that moment. I push my tongue forward until it collides with her teeth I can just feel the top of her gums with the edge of my tongue. She opens her mouth slightly and I wait a beat then I begin to explore the inside of her mouth. The experience is sour like cream cheese and fresh like cucumbers. It is also warm and wet and small. Heat from her mouth slides down my throat and runs ethereally through me collecting in my loins. My heart thuds in my ears I feel suffocated and I withdraw for my life. "Wow?" I hear in the darkness, I don't know how my eyes ended up closed; I open them slowly and see a pair of bright green eyes wide and looking into mine. "Nobodies ever kissed me like that." She says slightly breathlessly. "I wanted to kiss you like that for almost a decade." With the whole day in front of us we get up and walk up the river and through the village. We hold hands and when we walk past people they turn their heads. By six tonight the whole village will know that lonely loser that shovels slag at the mill is "going out" with Nicky Andropov. "The people here will think less of you for being with me you know." I say concerned. "Fuck them all." She returns bluntly. "I know what I want and it has very little to do with what they think." Somehow I know that she feels better than she did at the café and it makes me happy. "There is my truck." I point to a dusty red '88 Ford F150 that has rust holes spattered like paint all around its lower hemisphere. I ritualistically turn the key and pump the gas pedal a few times then give it a steady stream of gas as it misfires wildly producing a thin blue cloud from the tail pipe. I shove the stick hard at first gear and check to see if it made it by engaging the clutch. The answer rudely slams us into the cracked Nagahide bench seat and I turn away from the river. I suffer an apologetic look at Nicky. We leave town by a dirt logging road heading east over a wooden bridge after a few minutes I turn onto a road identified only by a sign that says "Pearl Creek FSR". Pearl Creek FSR snakes in 3D and to make it worse washout ditches at the low point have a jarring effect. I realise that I have become used to driving this road by myself with the steering wheel to hold onto. I slow dawn and look over to see Nicky grasping fending off the door with one hand while keeping the dashboard at a safe distance with the other. She looks pale and agitated as though she had been sitting on a paint shaker. "Jesus Christ Alex where are you taking me?" "You said you wanted to go to my place." I answer defensively feeling a little guilty for subjecting her to the ordeal. All of a sudden the road climbs incredibly steeply (I have had my truck in 4WD as long as I have owned it) and turns sharply while climbing. The suspension creeks as large pointy rocks bump the truck around. Then suddenly the road levels off onto a landing that has grown high with grass and weeds. I stop, habitually kick the parking brake on and the only sound is the tink tinking of metal contracting. I point to a sturdy log cabin just visible through the trees. "Home" I say simply. We both slam our doors shut loudly and I lead along a clearly defined path to my door. "A logger friend of my fathers squatted here until he had a claim just after they finished logging, initially he let me stay to keep the place up but a few months ago I bought it from him." "How do you get up here in the winter?" She asks incredulously. "Snow shoes." Just as we reach the cabin Nicky lets out a gasp as she realises that the cabin is practically perched on the top of a cliff overlooking a vast expanse of valley and rolling foothills. I lead her through the door into the slightly dimmer light of the cabin. There are effectively two rooms in my cabin; a kitchen, dining room, living room combination with a black cast iron stove a few simple wooden chairs and a table there are three windows a large one at the front of the house taking advantage of the spectacular view and a couple smaller ones off to the sides that let in some much needed light. The other room is a guest bedroom at the back of the house with a loft above it. I switch a light on and immediately there is a more homely feel to it as the dim light and shadows are banished by warm electric light. "Like it?" "I can't believe you live here, where is the bathroom?" "The toilet is just around the other side." I point through the wall. "Just walk out the door and around there is a path, you'll see it. There is a basin, soap and a towel there too but you will have to go to the creek for water." "Come with me." Nicky pleads. "I was going to get started on supper but ok." "You have a rifle over your door." Nicky says as we step through it. "That came with the house I don't actually use it except to shoot cans occasionally, it isn't registered and ammo is expensive. It's just a Lee Enfield 303 nothing special. There see its right here." I lead her right to the door of the outhouse. "And you can hear the creek right over there; I'll go back and start dinner." "Please stay." Nicky's eyes glance nervously up at me. "Ok." I stand guard obediently as she closes the door. I hear the sound of soft fabric as she takes her pants down and I can hear the sound of pee dropping. My heart has been racing since this morning but now it is making me nervous it's beating so fast and I can barely keep my hands from shaking. I hear her wipe and pull her pants up. The door swings open and I walk her to the creek filling the basin for her and washing my hands and face after she finishes we share the towel. She holds my hand warmly as we walk back to the cabin. "Do you like Indian food?" "I don't think I have had any." "One of the few options I have is potato curry lentils and rice so I hope not." "Sounds good." I pour some water from a large bucket into a pot for rice and reach into the fridge for some boiled potatoes and leftover lentils. Nicky flinches as I light the gas stovetop which makes a loud puffing sound and a few orange flames flare up from under the grilles. After a short time the house is saturated with the smell of cumin and cooked lentils. I again reach into my short refrigerator and pull out a litre of yogurt and add it to a plate of I have already put together with some lentils rice and yellow curry. "Well, here it is." I announce as I walk to where she is sitting beside the table staring out the main window. All of a sudden I am very conscious of my meagre fair and realise that I was going to add some lettuce but forgot. "You can have coffee or water with that." I add as I head back to the kitchen and serve myself. I bring her a mug of coffee and sit opposite her at the table and begin to eat. She seems to be enjoying it but still my nerves reduce my apatite and I refrain from my traditional second helping. After she finishes eating with a small amount still on her plate (as much as I hate wasting food I am even more averted to letting guests go hungry) Nicky walks over to me and kisses me lightly on the lips. "Thanks that was good Alex; I may even eat here again." Despite the fact that I'm still feeling a little disappointed about my food I can't help but smile and feel good. Nicky walks around the room examining my rather Spartan abode as I just watch her wondering why she is even here. She climbs the diagonally slanted ladder to the loft. "Where does this electricity come from?" I have been half hoping for that question for a while. "I have a Pelton wheel and a dynamo running off pearl creek." I add proudly, projecting my voice up into the ceiling. I pull myself up the ladder to see what Nicky is up to in the loft and walk over to my bed. I realise that Nicky is hiding a moment before she ambushes me from behind my dresser knocking me onto my bed. I can feel her thighs pressing warmly against the sides of my abdomen and she kisses my forehead. Biology kicks in and I feel warm all over as I feel my dick thicken and grow hard. All of a sudden Nicky seems to switch gears and she gets off me and takes all her clothes off like she was undressing alone for her morning shower. She sits on the bed and poses provocatively everything that was promised with her clothes on is exceeded. Her dark hair falls over her shoulder and stops just short of a pink nipple. She exudes health and beauty even kindness but no will. "Come on Alex, fuck me." She says as though she had rehearsed those lines until they were a cheesy equivalent to natural. "Is that what you want?" "Yeah babe." "Really?" An uncertain look passes across her face. "I am not going to do anything that you don't want me to." I look straight at her face seriously. Her façade withers slightly and she retracts into a more closed position. My eyes glance over her crotch as her knees pull together closing her pink slit. "I won't pay you a cent you know, I would die before making you feel like a whore and the only favour I will accept from you is to do whatever it is that you want to." I surprise myself with my presence of mind while this burning desire within me urges me to hold her and run my hands over every inch of her body. Nicky's act dissolves and she folds her arms over her breasts, tears well up under her eyes again. "I... I'm sorry Alex; I just wanted to make you happy." "I know Nicky, I don't want it unless you can be happy also, you can sleep in the guest bedroom downstairs if you want to." My voice feels hollow. I concentrate on not looking at her. I feel a hand on my shoulder. The hand moved to my back and a head went to my shoulder. "I want you to hold me Alex." Nicky whispers in my ear. I reach across her back with my arm and try to keep looking away as I hold her to me. This apparently isn't fully what Nicky had in mind; she slides up to me and puts her legs across my lap. She curls up on my lap her head just under my chin. I can feel her breast squishing against my chest through my T-shirt as she holds my chest with her arms. I concentrate on her breathing, her head presses against my chin when she inhales. I feel the firm outline of her butt in my lap my dick rages painfully against its confining cloth but I remain motionless and hold her enjoying her warmth. I kiss her hair. Nicky releases an arm and untwists herself looking up at my. I look down over her face, between her jaw and her shoulder and see her breast like a perfect droplet of flesh the firm nub of a nipple, the creases where her abdomen bends and her legs. Unable to help myself I kiss the hollow spot between her neck and shoulder she cocks her head to the side to let me. Pearl Creek "I want you Alex." She says honestly. "Thank god" I think. If I had to endure the torture of a naked model on my lap much longer I don't know what I would do. I lift her gently and put her on the bed on my blue wool summer covers and take my shirt off. Nicky slides under the cover and lays spread eagled waiting for me to undress. I take a deep breath as I take my shorts off feeling extremely self conscious and exposed. Quickly I slip under the covers finding the bed already warm and inviting. I roll into her inviting arms and we lay side by side looking at each other carefully. Her breasts move against my chest as we breathe my hands brush her hair back so that I can get a clear view of her wonderful face. My hands run over her body as we kiss I my hands hold her breasts and I feel her breath quicken through her chest. "Alex?" Our foreheads touch lightly. I find I have to swallow before answering. "Yes." "Where do you go to bath around here?" "I have a basin I wash in sometimes but I also have a tub outside." The last word is a gasp as she rotates her hips foreword and I feel her press against my dick with her belly. "You have an outdoor bathtub?" "You must have seen it; it is covered in a blue tarp." "I thought that was a boat." "It is big it is sort of a wood powered hot tub." "I want a demonstration." She gives me her mischievous smile. "Now?" "No silly have you lost track of what you are supposed to be doing again?" "Uh I am not exactly sure I know what I am supposed to be doing. Do you mind if I make it up as I go?" She presses herself against me and whispers into my ear "That depends." "What does it depend on?" I smile and kiss her lightly. "Where you go." She giggles and I can feel it shake her whole body against mine. "I'm not going anywhere you don't..." "Want me too? Yeah I got it, don't worry I'll show you." She pushes me softly over on my back and lets her weight rest on me it is a heavenly crushing sensation: her warmth is intoxicating. I feel her warm slit with the length of my sex and involuntarily thrust slightly there is warm moisture there. Through my chest I feel her sigh. She wiggles up my body a little and her hand comes between us. Her warm fingers encircle my shaft and she holds it firmly lifting it slightly and then she wiggles back an adorable smile on her face the whole time. It's electric as I press into wet hot bliss. The radiant heat and pressure spread down my shaft until I am engulfed completely. With every tiny motion corrugations inside her send jolts of pleasure deep into my core. Still she rests on me mercifully crushing me and lay still thanking god for this moment and begging for it never to end. I kiss her lips again softly. "I am definitely not letting go." I whisper to her ear her cheek presses against my neck and I feel it bulge her face pregnant with a smile. "Promise?" She teases as she begins to slide slowly up and down my body. Pure ecstasy pulses through me and instinctively I push into her. We become like the sea rocking onto the shore, waves pass through us. Nicky begins to make soft noises through her nose at every crest. "Mmm... mmm oh my god. Alex I'm... Oh my god I'm going to come?" "For uh for... for real?" "Oh my god yes. YESSS." Her voice breaks on the last word and it comes out as a primal groan from deep within her. Her pace quickens and the sound of linen shifting back and forth and heavy breathing fills the room. I feel strong undulations around my dick then thru ought her body as her orgasm begins. A watery jolt flows through me as I feel my own climax approaching. I raise my hand and hold her cheek with the palm of it trying to touch her pleasure as I come. Long gooey waves flow through me and deep into her engulfing our point of union with excess moisture. All through this Nicky announces every stroke with a little whine. We continue thrusting into each other for a while after our climax. It is sloppy now and a faint wet noise can be heard at every thrust. "Did you feel that?" I give up and relax under her. "That is a colossal understatement." She kisses my nose. "I am glad Nicky." A single tear runs down her cheek and she pinches my chin. She pulls forward and my now drenched dick falls between us. She lays on me again with her hips splayed wide apart a couple drips of warm fluid fall from her onto my belly. She rolls over and we lie looking at each other our arms wrapped around each other in a long embrace as sleep overwhelms us both.