5 comments/ 10913 views/ 1 favorites Painting with Lydia By: EgmontGrigor2011 CHAPTER 1 Eddie Carter had been working for Gilmore Home Decorators in Crawley, England, for three weeks and during that time had been painting commercial premises - a paint store, gymnasium, bicycle shop and bakery. The Australian preferred painting homes where there was always the chance of the woman of the house providing coffee and freshly-buttered scones for morning and afternoon tea and a hot lunch in return for excellence in painting. Eddie wasn't sure how women could tell if the painting with catering was any better than painting without, but there you are. Women can be so trusting. The 32-year old had sold his photography business in suburban Sydney and had opted to tour England on a working holiday before deciding what to do next. This action was precipitated when his female partner of three years ditched him for a window cleaner. Humiliated at being dumped for an uneducated lout by the woman who called herself his unofficial fiancée, Eddie's reaction was to really distance himself from here because he didn't want him attempting a reconciliation when she realized that a guy who demanded sex three times a day was not actually creating Utopia. During school holidays and when doing a 4-year part-time diploma in photography, Eddie had worked for his dad, a master painter, who had a home decorating business. Eddie was given the choice of painting or plastering and chose painting. He became very knowledgeable and skilled under his dad's tutorship. He'd chased after a job as a painter in Crawley in southern England, as a strategic base to tour a wide area of the country at weekends. He then planned to move to Exeter, Cheltenham, Stoke on Trent and then Barnsley before planning where to locate next. He thought a month to nine weeks in each location would be about right, but who knows? He might hate England and return to Australia within a month. Coming back to the depot with two other painters after finishing the bakery job, Eddie saw Mrs Gilmore who said cheerfully, "How are you going Duckie, I mean Aussie?" "I appear to be fitting in well Mrs Gilmore." "Fine, fine, but are you happy?" "I'm happiest when painting inside houses, not exteriors though. I excel at cutting-in and using a roller to provide flawless finishes." Mrs Gilmore nodded, looked at him and said, "Just a moment love." She yelled Bert and her husband Albert came out growling, "What now?" "Eddie here would like to do domestic interior work. He might be the guy to send to Middlemarch. You have perused Eddie's work." "Oh yeah, he'll be the man but he'll have to use his vehicle. Pay him mileage. You brief him." Next morning Eddie drove his campervan into a driveway in need of repair and evaded potholes on the twisting route between oak trees up to a huge home called Middlemarch. "Good morning young man," said the gray-haired woman with a friendly smile. "I'm Lady Fisher. You are Australian I understand? My mother had some Australians staying here recuperating from battle injuries during World War 11." "That was very kind of her." "She was doing her bit for the War Effort. I was here of course, but was only a tot. The soldiers were very nice to me and apparently taught my mother dirty songs." Eddie smiled, not knowing what to say. So he told her his name. "Come in and meet my youngest daughter who has got herself into a pickle attempting to paint the ceiling of the ballroom. Brush marks are showing everywhere. She sent out for scaffolding to see if that will help to improve things. She has been painting up on a stepladder, just the one ladder without a plank." "And therein lies part of the problem Lady Fisher. I can help sort it out." "Lydia this is Mr Carter from Australia, sent by Elsie Gilmore to sort you out." "So they had to send to Australia for an expert?" said the woman. Eddie almost wet himself in shock. The tall woman was pale, with ruby red lips... a stunning beauty and because she was fooling around with the scaffolding rather than painting she'd discarded her overalls and was wearing just in a tee and a short skirt and sneakers. Her breasts were mouth-watering. He swallowed to remove excessive saliva that had suddenly been generated. Yes very mouth-watering. "Oh hi. You must excuse me dressed inadequately. I'm trying to assemble this damn complex scaffolding. The fools didn't pack assembly instruction." "I'll leave you two to get on with it," said Lady Fisher. "I'll have Elsie bring you coffee and hot-buttered scones at 10:30." Calling thanks, Eddie said, "I'm Eddie Carter and have been working for Gilmore Home Decorators for three weeks." "Oh hi, I'm Lydia Fisher... please don't call me Lady Lydia. My father is the Earl of Lyttelton. You may be interested to know mother is actually the Countess of Lyttelton but you should continue to call her Lady Fisher, which is her preference, although confusing. You see our family name is Fisher. She may invite you to call her Barbara. You just call me Lydia. I'm not into titles. I hope that was not too confusing for you." "That confused me in knots Lydia. I'm really a guy who works on the simplified need-to-know basis." "Oh what's that?" "Just tell me what I need to know." She clapped her hands and said, "Oh my goodness, that's clever." Eddie now had a growing erection problem because her tits had wobbled when she clapped her hands. He turned away from her and said, "Let's look at this scaffolding." "It's over this way," she said. Eddie pulled out his shirt and turned happily, knowing his bulge was concealed by the bottom of his shirt hanging out. She frowned, "They sent wheels with it for some reason." "Lydia dear, it's a mobile scaffolding frame." "Why are you calling me dear?" "Because I'm a happy chappie who takes liberties." "I see. Well I best ensure I don't bend over in front of you." Eddie gaped at her. She said, "You may close your mouth now. I apologize for shocking you." "Um is it all right if I grope you?" "Not today I shouldn't think." "Oh." "I suggest you slow down a little Eddie." "Oh okay. God would you really bend over in front of me know what I might do?" "I might by the time the week is out." "But when exactly?" "Like I said, possibly by the time the week is out." Eddie took a deep breath. "Let assemble this scaffolding. Your painting is shit?" "I beg your pardon." "Just face the truth Lydia. You know you are capable of doing better than that, perhaps much better. You simply failed due to inadequate equipment and faulty technique." "God I really don't know why I'm not slapping you." "Because you love me?" She frowned. "Was that a question or a statement?" "Take your pick. Pass me the spanner please. I don't need written instructions because this is a standard free-standing frame. Any dummy can erect it." "I see." "Er meaning male painters." "Thank you. You do take it to the brink Eddie." "It's my nature. Here give my a kiss." "I'm a divorcee." "So?" "Oh very well. Now no tonguing." It was a sweet kiss and they both kept their eyes open and that suggested both knew they were thinking this was going somewhere. "God it won't be long before you are into my panties you Australian Romeo." "Now don't get yourself over-excited Lydia. The spanner please." They had the scaffold assembled and in place within twenty minutes. Eddie then looked at the sizeable ceiling and then looked at the tins of paint. "You are two cans short." "How do you know? You haven't measured up?" "I know." "Well I have other cans of ceiling paint on hand. We won't run out." "Right I'll get my protective clothing on. You may help on the first coat but I do the second coat and all the cutting-in okay." "That makes sense. You are the professional." They were all set to begin when the maid arrived with morning tea. They finished painting the ceiling at 2:15. Lydia had been very useful when Eddie applied the second coat. She handed up new cans of paint and taking away the empties and pushing Eddie along when he wanted the scaffold moved. She kept up non-stop chatter. He jumped down and kissed her. "You were very, very useful. We sped through that last coat thanks to your great assistance." "I know and thank you. It looks great. We must have lunch. I'll get mother to take a look." Lady Fisher came in and praised the excellence of the work. "I think I'll get you two to paint most of the house." "Er how many rooms are there?" "Thirty-three I think Eddie." He looked at Lydia who nodded. "Very well. Will you pay Lydia? It's damn hard work for it although easier now we have the scaffold and I have changed her from brush to substantially roller painting." "Of course and she'll probably donate the money to one of her favored charities. She has plenty of money. I'll phone Elsie Gilmore to advise I'm keeping you on. We best get the rest of the paint from her." "That would be diplomatic." "Would you like to stay here?" Eddie glanced at Lydia whose face remained impassive. "Yes that's a good idea. I have my campervan." "I meant in the house as our guest. Before long it's likely you and Lydia will get something going I feel." "Perhaps." "She'll choose your bedroom and Elsie will prepare it for you. Elsie will take care of your washing too." "Thank you. You are so kind Lady Fisher." "Well I recognize good painting when I see it. Oh you may call me Barbara." "Thank you Barbara." "Take Eddie to the swimming pool darling and then perhaps play billiards or go for a walk. Pre-dinner drinks will be at 6:45. I have no idea when my husband will be home." * * * Lydia told Eddie where the pool was and disappeared. The pool was a modern addition to the old home and had a glass domed ceiling. Lydia had not appeared and so Eddie began swimming. He had everything he owned in the campervan so was prepared for any eventuality. He heard Lydia call, "I thought Australians could swim like fish." "I'm one of them who just hack about. I was never coached. She was dressed in tight blue and the shirt was short and the legs looked great. "Here's a beer," she called and stood right at the edge and must have known he could look up her dress. He almost dislocated his neck attempting to avoid looking up there. "It's okay, I'm wearing panties." "Always?" "No." He rested with his back against the side and coping and she squatted next to him, a very friendly gesture. He passed the pint bottle to her and she sipped without attempting to wipe the top. That told Eddie she'd accepted him and his germs. "Thanks," she said, handing the bottle back. He looked at her and asked how old was she? "Thirty-six." "Any kids?" "No. It is believed he was the problem." "Why did it end, because of that?" "Not really, he became arrogant and unfeeling for me. He said there wasn't another woman but I didn't believe him and finally I asked for a divorce and he appeared rather relieved." "So it must have been you?" "God you're rude," she giggled. "Perhaps for varied reasons we just fell out of love. I honestly don't know and his unwillingness to communicate didn't assist." "Time is running out for you to have kids." "Don't I know it." "Would you like me to impregnate you?" She giggled and said yes please but looking down at him said, "Omigod you appear serious?" "Yes and I understand with you in that position it's not a subject to trifle with." "Eddie that is a stunning offer and, well, you are a dear man for making the offer but I couldn't accept. God I haven't even considered such an eventuality." "Well don't be too quick to reject the offer. Take time, plenty of time, to consider it. At this point I'm not accepting your answer of no because it's too premature. That's all we need to say about this for now, right?" "I... yes, you're quite right." They chatted about themselves as if knowing that was necessary, very necessary under this new change in their relationship. Lydia stood. "Time to get out. Do you wish me to dry you or can you manage?" "Can't wait to get your hands on me eh?" Lydia flushed and she said, "For some hours I'd been thinking it appeared inevitable we'd have sex." "You were right to think that. Have you put me next to your bedroom?" "Yes." He smiled. "And is there a connecting door?" "Yes." "And do you believe your mother would have expected you to make that arrangement? She looked startled and said yes. "You are very perceptive for a house painter." "Thank you. Of course as a trained photographer I have been trained to look beyond what I see."' "Oh yes, you did say you had worked as a photographer. I'm very happy to have you staying here Eddie. I have been so lonely. Daddy doesn't really talk to us, rather he talks at us, if you know what I mean and really mommy and I don't have an awful lot in common." "What do we have in common Lydia?" "A mutual interest in sex?" "I was hoping you'd have the guts to say that. Well done." She giggled and walked away, leaving him to dry himself and had no idea how to play billiards but was sure Lydia would feel empowered if he asked her to teach him, not that he'd have to say he couldn't play because he would stand there looking hopeless. * * * Eddie dressed for dinner in dark pants, a white shirt and the only tie in his possession and when ready knocked at Lydia's door, having worked out which side of his room she was by the location of a connecting door that had a 10-inch thick bolt on his side. She same out in the same dress but smelling of stronger perfume and her lips were redder. She kissed him without warning. That was a bit of a surprise and he managed to grope a little. There was no objection or resistance. As they walked into the drawing room, whatever that was, Eddie say the elderly gentleman and panicked. "What do I address him as?' "Please yourself," was the unhelpful reply, but she did say, "Greet daddy first." "Good evening My Lord. I'm Eddie the painter." "Good evening. I've seen the ceiling and must say jolly good show. My wife tells my you are a professional photographer in your homeland?" Eddie thought well he was informed, the conduit being Lydia via her mother. "Yes sir. Good evening Barbara." "Good evening Eddie." "Eddie eh?" "Yes My Lord." "And from Australia I understand?" "True My Lord." "Do you drink beer?" "I have been known to sink a pint or two My Lord." "Lydia call for two dark ales and order what you two women want. Son please call me Osmond." "And Ossie is not to be confused with the other form also called Aussie?" "You have the hallmarks of being an entertaining and irrelevant guest my boy but then you are Australian." The meal went well, despite Bennie feeling a little nauseated when the pork arrived on a huge platter with the pig's head intact. They sat talking over coffee and then watched the mid evening news and then the younger couple said goodnight. "We are going to watch racier TV in my lounge," Lydia said. Eddie wasn't really keen on TV apart from watching sport but when they got to their bedrooms she said to grab a towel and head for the pool. He was in the heated pool when she arrived carrying a tray of drinks and was draped in a towel. When the towel dropped and he saw she was nude, Eddie almost dislocated a hip when excitedly kicking off his swimsuit. He stayed in the center the pool frozen in shyness, an emotional state practically unknown to Australians. Lydia waded over to him and said, "Kiss my tits." Eddie obeyed, with gusto. They entwined and fondled each other's genitals as younger people know these days what is expected of them on first dates, although technically was this a date? "You'll need a condom," Lydia said hoarsely. But Eddie tried to argue. "I thought you said you didn't think you'd want me to grope you this week." "I said I shouldn't think we'd do it before the week was out. I'm not necessarily right in everything I say although I'm aware men expect women to achieve that state of excellence." "I-I'll have to go out to the van." "Oooh, good boy. You didn't really take it for granted I'd let you plunder me." "Plunder you?" Eddie choked. "It's just a turn of phrase sweetheart. Don't be too eager to read everything into it. I have condoms. Go down to the steps at the shallow end." Eddie thought oh hello, she knew about bending over the coping of a swimming pool at the steps. But he wasn't jealous. She arrived back with a towel and a packet of something and said, "I must have had a premonition this was coming because I carried out a long overdue trimming of my bush only yesterday." He said all good things come to those who wait and clip and she giggled. "I'll spread my towel out like this and won't get abrasions from the paving titles. I learnt this after coming across my sister and her eldest son fucking here last month. Mothers seem to teach their kids everything these days." "I didn't know that," Eddie swallowed. Lydia lay on her front on the towel with her legs in the water to present beautifully her pussy and little rosebud to the almost overwhelmed Eddie. God even her cunt and anus were almost beautiful. He was almost convinced he'd fallen off the scaffold after over-dosing on paint fumes and was experiencing a lucid dream during his state of ecstasy. But he caught a whiff of her arousal and knew this was no dream. Eddie positioned on a step and knelt and licked in long, soft strokes up and down her butt, giving Lydia a precursor of being on the cusp of somniferous descent into decadent carnal delight. She groaned, that long groan coming from deep down. They were away. Eventually she thrust back at in squeals of delight, adding a new level of wetness to Eddie's fingers and mouth. "God," she puffed, turning on to her back and grasping his erection to jerk it, "You can do that to me any time you wish." That was a rather rash statement. However Eddie appeared responsible enough not to recklessly take advantage of the offer. Lydia rolled the condom on him and said, "Push in slowly sweetheart; you are rather large. We'll have a real job getting this up my butt." "There's no rush and we'd bound to find a way," Eddie said confidently. "Perhaps we ought to wait until we are drunk and therefore very relaxed. But in the meantime there is always this delightful pussy." "Oh Eddie." If Barbara noticed when the couple were arriving for breakfast that her daughter appeared to be having a little difficulty walking and Eddie appeared to be rather jaded she gave no indication. She greeted them warmly and gave Eddie their account number with Gilmore Home Decorators and told him to pick up whatever he needed. "I suggest you two do the public rooms first. Lydia doing the kitchen will require careful negotiation with Cook and Muriel will need to be kept fully informed." Eddie found out later Muriel was housekeeper and in charge of all staff except Cook and her assistant and temporary kitchen help. CHAPTER 2 Mrs Gilmore took a close look at Eddie and said, "Ah I see you have been at the Fisher's youngest already." Eddie just grinned and wondered how the hell did she know that. He told Mrs Gilmore that he'd been asked to internally redecorate most of the house. "Hmmm," she said. "I suggested to Lady Fisher that she buy everything I need through you." "Oh really?" "At trade price." "Naturally Eddie. Look you were only working here short-term. You were honest enough to make that clear to me when I engaged you. I suggest you resign your employment here as from Friday and then negotiate a pay rate with Lady Fisher. You could arrange for just a cash payment that will be tax free and you'll not have to pay other levies." Painting with Lydia "Is that a good idea." "Eddie you'll be stuck at Middlemarch painting for weeks. Whether or not becoming a private contractor will be a good idea will depend on your negotiating skills. I'll have your replacement hired by the weekend and we are happy to become your primary supplier." So Eddie resigned and used the Middlemarch account to buy the supplies he needed for the next three weeks. Lady Fisher had requested all walls to be pained in a lighter shade to their present color and he thought that was very progressive of her. He'd suggest new light fittings later. Lydia had told him her parents were very wealthy but kept the exterior of the house drab, the farm mismanaged and the driveway potholed to put off folk trying to squeeze money out of them. He thought that was brilliant strategy. "I have heaps of money too. I was married to the wayward son of wealthy parents and daddy hired a top lawyer who worked brilliantly to get me a very generous settlement that included an agreement that I would not talk to the media. I was also compensated for hurt and humiliation that I hadn't known I'd suffered although I was pissed off not being made pregnant. I used some of that money to buy three farms on the advice of my accountant for the benefits of farm subsidies and tax write-offs." "Good for you." "Thank you. Don't you want to know how much I'm worth?" "No it's you charm and your cunt that interest me." Lydia giggled and said he was awful using that word (he'd found she used it when highly aroused during sex). When Eddie arriving back at Middlemarch Lady Fisher invited him through for coffee. "Elsie phoned to say the best arrangement would be for me to hire you and she'd sell us product at trade price. How much was she paying you?" Eddie told her and Lady Fisher said that was the same figure Elsie had said. "Obviously you are honest. Well I'll double that figure and you work the hours you wish. Elsie said you'd already resigned anticipating I'd hire you." "Yes, I thought you would see the sense in being my true boss because this is really a huge job." "I know. I could hire a team of painters but then the locals would spread the word we appear to have come into money or something of that nature. Since you have already seduced my daughter who is at present out shopping, I have instructed Muriel to move you two into the premier guest suite that is quite close to the pool and the games room. It's actually called the eastern wing. Could you two not have sex in the pool because I also swim in that water every morning." "Oh yes of course. Um what will be Lydia's reaction to being moved?" "Total agreement I should think. She suggested it." * * * Eddie thought about his deepening relationship with Lydia. Well once you were having sex it must go deeper and that was not being flippant. However, was he reading too much into it or was Lydia falling for him? She had plenty of money apparently so in that case could afford to be choosey. And if the amount of money was huge and she decided to live with him indefinitely or even marry him, then presumable they could go to Scotland had use some of that money to buy a title for him and they could then travel round the world in luxury and be fêted as being um nobility. Eddie shook his head and scolded, "Son you are dreaming. That woman is only giving you the time of day, and her pussy, because you are the only red-blooded man within easy reach. And you at home strutting with the rich and famous? Oh yeah? He decided to stop thinking such rubbish as life with Lydia, or more accurate, a life on tour of England painting with Lydia. She was painting to appease her mother who didn't want English painters supplemented by non English-speaking foreigners in her home when she was living in it. Presumably a smiling Australian painter was acceptable because... well possibly because mother wore Elle Macpherson intimates and knew that Elle was a former Australian super model before turning to body beautiful fashion. Eddie and Lydia painted steadily for five days a week and at the end of three weeks Lady Fisher said, "Well that is all the rooms we use done. It scarcely seems sensible opening the two wings we have used in years, does it?" "No," Lydia and Eddie chorused. As they finished clearing away Lydia said, "Let's have sex here; this room marks the end of our first joint project." "What on the carpet," he said, stating the obvious because the room was completely unfurnished. "Yes," she smiled, removing her paint-splatted overalls and protective headscarf and next to go were her panties. Eddie was tentative because he was wondering not only was this the end of their first chapter but within hours they would find THE END had arrived to their relationship by mutual consent, although he'd not be the instigator. He removed his overalls and when she saw what he had in his hand she complained, "That's a poor excuse for an erection." "Sorry," he mumbled. She looked concerned and hugged him and asked what was wrong. "Coming to the end of this job when I hadn't expected such a sudden end has left me somewhat apprehensive." "Look should I work this up for you and we talk about what next when we are resting?" Eddie thought that was a good idea because her gentle coaxing was already having an excellent result. Surprisingly, as far as post-lunch coitus goes it would have rated well, actually one of their best to date. They'd got into it slowly and rather wetly but when Eddie improved on the conventional missionary and lifted her bum by placing her lower legs over his shoulders to really get the long strokes plunging in deeply, Lydia bent her neck sharply and began licking her breasts and staring at Eddie with an intensity he'd not seen from her before. He loved it. She soon settled back and began rocking back at him and he assumed that was it. But oh no. She called a brief halt. "I stopped taking contraception thirty days ago. Pull the condom off. I won't require you to use them when you are in my pussy." "Are you sure?" "Absolutely and don't withdraw when you are about to explode. This will be our new regime." Eddie didn't last too long after that. The thought of streaming semen deep into the pussy of an attractive woman still of childbearing age was just too much. And he really did exploded. They ate alone that evening, Lydia's parents being out for dinner with old friends. The atmosphere was rather subdued, rather like the last meal at boarding school or leaving home for the final time. Lydia had been acting twitchy so he joked, "Are you pregnant." She replied haughtily, "That could take a very long time to achieve or perhaps I'm barren." "Sorry." "It's okay. I'm rather edgy, that's all. Where will you go?" "I intend sticking to my original plan of heading across to Exeter, work there for a month or so and have a look around at weekends and then head north." "Take me with you." "Lydia please, that will be a nomad type of existence. It's not for you." "How can you say that?" "Sorry." She fired, "Will you please stop saying sorry to me all the time." He watched her lips quiver and thought so saying something twice is now akin to saying it all the time. Why not take her... she could abandon him when she became bored shitless." "Okay then come with me. I'd like that, really like that." Lydia flew around the corner of the table and hugged him and Eddie pushed out his chair and she sat on his lap crying, "Thank you, thank you." In the morning Lydia not long after dawn Lydia left the bed to go to her mother to tell her the news. "Good morning darling," said her mother, who was reading in bed. She removed her glasses and said, "I thought today's young people were always engaged in yet more sex at this time of day?" Lydia kissed her mother and although mindful her father slept down the hall, said, "Aren't you thinking of people of your generation?" Her mother smiled and threw back the covers and Lydia climbed in. "Mother something wonderful has happened. Eddie has asked me to go with him on his working tour around England." Her mother's face darkened. * * * Lydia was tearful and her mother was nowhere to be seen two days later when Eddie kissed Lydia goodbye and attempted to cheer her up saying, "Cheer up, these things happen. Families come first." "She's such a bitch living here like a recluse and attempting to chain me to her." Lady Fisher had been adamant, she wanted Lydia to stay and she was happy for Eddie to stay for as long as he wished but if Lydia left her Lady Fisher alleged she'd lose her desire to live and would surely die. Further no way did she wish Lydia to remarry. Eddie told Lydia she was faced with a bummer of a choice and she had to make it alone. If she stayed he would visit in several months before leaving for Australia. Lydia cried and pleaded with Eddie to stay but he said he was not prepared to be that generous in spirit. He found the weather and other things not to his liking and would prefer living back in Sydney. "Home is where your mind is. Lydia think carefully, do you really think this is your home?" "You are attempting to mentally seduce me when you promised you wouldn't." "Sorry." "Don't say sorry... you are always saying that." "Eddie go walkies," he said in a childlike voice and Eddie went walkies to give Lydia space to think over her dilemma. * * * Eddie drove off heading southwest to Exeter where his mother's forebears had left for Australia some 160 years ago. He was saddened at Lydia's decision to stay with her mother but... well they were family. He wished Lydia had called in other close members of her family to sort of her mother and her appalling behavior to try to maintain her grip on to her daughter. He wondered if he'd left her pregnant. Well she had his email address. The Australian headed for Southampton where he'd stay with a former friend whom his parents had billeted when he was in Sydney with a university rowing team. Ray was now married with two small kids and worked as a quantity surveyor. There was a noisy back-slapping reunion that scared the two under-five kids so it was more than an hour before they would come near the visitor. Mary the dark-haired wife was attractive and very friendly and kissed Eddie on the lips and said, "Ray told me you were a good-looking bastard in a rugged way." "Um Australians used bastard in normal conversation dear but I didn't mean for you to repeat what I said verbatim," grinned her husband. "Ray loved his time in Australia," Mary said. "We are talking about immigrating. If we did would you meet us because that would mean so much to us?" "Yeah sure. Aussie needs more dark-headed beauties like you. In Sydney we are over-run by blondes." "God you are such as charmer. I must invite my sister over for dinner. Her husband is in Greece at present. Eddie wondered what that meant. Either Mary was being exceedingly optimistic in offering her sister or perhaps the sister was also thinking of moving to Australia. But did it matter? He was happy to reunite with Ray with the prospect of going with him to a pub and chewing over old times. That happened. It was Saturday and at 4:00 Mary said, "Shouldn't you two be heading to the pub?" Manfully clearing his throat Eddie said, "I really should be spending my time here with you all. I'll be heading off in the morning and..." "Cut the crap Eddie," Mary smiled. "Off you go for a couple of pints. Do try to get my man home by 5:30 to help feed his children and put them to bed." Eddie thought that both May and Ray would make great Australian citizens because they both were flexible and able to think beyond themselves. He and Ray had a great time yarning with three of Ray's pals. All the guys loved the thought of doing what Eddie was doing, working his way around the country and driving his home with him. At 5.20 Eddie said to Ray, "Come on pal we are due home." Ray took a few seconds to comprehend and then said, "Oh Mary expects us to be late." "I agreed to be home by 5:30." "Right mate Australia rules. We're off guys." Mary appeared astounded when they walked in at 5:32 but just smiled and didn't look at the clock. "Sheba has said she wants you to put her to bed tonight Eddie." It was Eddie's turn to look astounded. "By why?" "I have been telling her the things I recall Ray telling my about his great Australian adventure and that you were the best guy he met in Australia." Eddie turned to look at Ray but he was apparently looking for fly spots on the ceiling. "B-but I know nothing about little kids and anyway mothers don't trust there small children with men they don't know." Mary said softly, "Another thing Ray told me you saved him from a real beating in an Aussie pub and when I asked why did you put yourself at risk Ray said you were the type of guy who'd stand by a cobber through thick and thin. Are you saying I'm so hollow I wouldn't have confidence in you after that high accolade?" "I have no quarrel with your appraisal." "Thank you. Anyway Carly is on the way over. Her real name is Charlotte but for god sake don't call her Charlotte. She will help you to put Sheba down. She's Sheba's godmother." "Oh." "She's not old if that's what you're thinking. She's in her mid-thirties." "Oh." "Eddie why have you closed down. You were revved up and so friendly and voluble when you arrived. Have we done something wrong?" Ray came in, hearing the end of that conversation and said, "Come on mate, out with it." "Babies." "What?" Mary said, looking quite shocked. "What's wrong with our children." "I-I'm shy of the little ones." "Shy or scared?" "Close to scared I suppose. I was handed a baby by a friend's wife once and if she hadn't reacted so instantly I would have dropped the wee critter." Mary's manner changed abruptly. "Oh darling, you poor boy. That must have been a real scary experience for you. All you have to do with little ones is not to allow your concentration to wander. Um mother's mightn't like your calling them critters." "Oh but little ones is okay?" "Yes. Come with me. The kids are watching a cartoon. Now they are not really babies. Sheba is four and Adam is three. Meet Carly when she arrives Ray and that should be any time soon." Mary told Eddie to sit on the sofa alongside Sheba. Adam was lying on the floor. "Say hi to Uncle Eddie children." Adam ignored his mother but Sheba said hi without taking her eyes off the screen. Then still looking at the screen she climbed on to Eddie's lap and lay back against him. "Keep calm Eddie," Mary whispered, I've going out to the kitchen now." "Fine," Eddie choked. A few minutes later he caught a movement at the doorway and looked up, expecting it was Mary checking that he was okay. It was an older Mary look-alike with a silver streak through her dark hair. "Hi Sheba." "Hi Aunt Carly." "Hi Adam." There was no reply. "Do I switch off TV Adam?" "Hi Aunt Carly." "Climb off Uncle Eddie's knee darling and kiss him. We want him out here to talk to us. You two can still watch TV." Sheba climbed onto the sofa and leaned across to Eddie and gave him a slopping kiss on the cheek. "Remember you are putting me to bed and reading me a story." "Yeah Sheba. You won't let me forget will you?" She looked at him and smiled. He thought Sheba was the greatest little kid he could ever recall meeting. In the hallway Carly introduced herself and said, "Now it's my turn for a kiss. She kissed him softly and beautifully and pressed into him. He grabbed a tit and she purred, "Good boy. Are you fine with adultery?" He hesitated and nodded and Carly looked nervous. After ten minutes of foursome conversation Sheba arrived at the doorway into the living room and yawned. "I'm ready." "Fine darling, Aunt Carly will help." "Good but I want the story from Uncle Eddie." Eddie said Sheba could pick the story. "I want you to tell me a story your mummy told you." "Okay it was my favorite, a story about how the kangaroos played a cricked match against the champion team of men from the Mimili Hotel." "Eddie." "It's okay Mary. My mother believed it was suitable for the ears of a young child." "I know what a kangaroo is Eddie." "Uncle Eddie please Sheba." "Eddie?" "Eddie is fine by me Sheba." "See mummy. Eddie says it's okay." After everyone pitched in to clear away after dinner, the two couples played cards for more than an hour and then Mary said, "Well Ray and I are off to bed. Eddie it's okay if you wish to escort Carly home. Perhaps we'll all meet up for a picnic in the New Forest National Park, our usual spot Carly. You might like to take Eddie around the Old Town in the morning." When Ray and Mary left the room Eddie sighed and Carly asked, "What?" "Is this a good idea?" Now she hesitated before saying whatever he decided she would accept. "I believe this situation has arisen because Mary has over-acted the part of hostess." Carly nodded and said Mary tended to sometimes go over the top. "And if you hadn't been on hand she might have even offered herself, thinking I was a poor lonely Aussie a long, long way from home and she was grateful that I'd been so good to Ray in Australia whom she was dating in those days." "Well yes, perhaps. Um it's not because I don't like you." "But it's adultery and there is such a thing as loyalty to one's spouse." She smiled and said yes that was exactly it and he said he'd never knowingly committed adultery. She said she must go and they kissed beside her car like old friends. Carly closed the door and wound down the window. "Thanks for letting me off the hook. Um I expect I would have enjoyed it." "But then later your conscience would have kicked in." "Yes," she smiled and drove off with a wave. Eddie returned inside and knocked on the bedroom door. Mary called to wait a minute and then said okay and Eddie went in to find Ray on his back and Mary sitting with her back against the headboard looking very red-faced with her hair in a mess. "Whoops sorry," Eddie smiled. Ray chuckled, "It's okay cobber, you mightn't be aware but married couples still do it." "Yes it's quite all right Eddie. Is something wrong?" "Not really. We both got cold feet as soon as you two left us." "Oh such a shame," Mary cried. "No we were both relieved we chickened out and I feel very comfortable about it." They talked for a few minutes and then Eddie said, "Listen guys, thanks for your hospitality and it's lovely to confirm we have a real friendship going. Ray often told me in Australian you and I would really like each other Mary. Look I'll push on tonight and camp off-road somewhere when I get tired. I'll contact you before I leave for home and will look after you if you decide to make Australia your new home. I'll introduce the kids to kangaroos in the wild." He left fifteen minutes later, Mary crying as she kissed him with the type of kiss Eddie would remember for a day or two. His back felt tender after the backslapping farewell he and Ray engaged in and he drove off feeling very happy. * * * On his third day in Exeter Eddie answered a morning newspaper advertisement and half an hour later was signed up and being taken by the painting contractor to join a gang of two painting the interior of a three-level office building. "We are behind with this job and the building owner is fending off complaints from tenants about the continued disruption," said Norman, as they drove through the rather attractive river city. Norman introduced Eddie to Mick and Patrick who were told the new guy would start immediately. Painting with Lydia "Bring Eddie back to the depot when you knock off Patrick. His vehicle is parked there." "Yes boss." That was said with a smirk and Eddie later learnt that Norman was Patrick's father. When Norman and Eddie returned that evening Patrick said it would be okay for Eddie to stay in his campervan in the compound and gave him a key to the gates. Later Eddie was in the supermarket and a woman attempting to take six cans of fruit off an upper shelf in one hit to load in her trolley called, "Could someone please help me." Something had gone wrong and she had the two stacks each of three cans resting on her tits and against her chin. "Hold still, I'll take them off one lot at a time. We don't want you hurt." "Are you Australian?" "Yeah he said," removing the left-side cans. "How did you know? I'm not wearing a name and location tag." "You speak funny. I've been to Australia." He put the first lot of cans down and then removed the remaining three cans. "You have great tits." "And you are a very rude young man," said the 40-year old. "I should call the manager." "Do that and I'll kill you," Eddie joked and watched horrified as the woman turned white. "Oh not, sorry. That was a joke," he said, appealing with his eyes. She looked doubtful. "Aussie humor." She managed a smile and said oh yeah. "God you gave me such a fright." "I deeply apologize. Are you okay if I leave you now? Perhaps you shouldn't go shopping alone." "I always shop alone. I'm not married and live alone." "Um then how do you get sex? You dress sexy and don't look like a dried up prune?" She smiled and looked around furtively and whispered, "I fake minor mishaps like I just did to you and the guy I focused on usually comes to my rescue. Then at the school where I teach we have male teachers and some randy fathers and my mechanic drives me home every third month after servicing my car." "Oh very cute. Well done I suppose." "Then will you come home with me... um we'll have dinner as well?" "Yes and thank you. It would be rude to turn you down." She smiled. "Would you like a beef roast?" "Oh yummy, that could be almost as good as the sex." She really laughed and said he was a really nice guy. It was just a one-night stand. Janet shooed him off next morning without breakfast and said it would be best if they didn't associate again. He wondered if that was her method of operation or had he been that bad? He didn't seek enlightenment and he left, being almost pushed out of the door and not kissed. He worked in a bad mood most of the day and then received a phone call and just like that his life turned around. "Hi darling, it's Lydia. Where are you?" "In Exeter and thinking of moving on." Lydia said something marvelous had happened. Her mother had seen how unhappy she was and had caved in and had said to go after him. "Go after me?" "Yes Eddie. I love you." "Eh, when did that happen?" "The feeling resided in my when you were still here but since you left I've thought of little else but you. I now really love you, I know it." "Oh yeah," Eddie said carefully, not knowing how to handle this. He was in new territory. "Thank god you are neutral, in shock I suppose. At least that's better than outright rejection." "Oh no, I'd never reject you. You are the finest woman I've ever fucked." "Oh Eddie, what glorious words to my ears but perhaps had sex with would sound more couth than saying fucked." "Yes of course. One day you might write your memoirs." She giggled and said his abuse of the English language and the way in which his semi-profound thoughts lurched wildly from side to side were two things she found endearing about him. The other big thing that endeared him to her was not suitable for comment on a public telephone system. He chuckled and she burst into tears and said she really missed him and his evergreen humor. "And I know my crying will embarrass you," she sniffed. "No I bet not many guys have a beautiful woman crying over them." "Oh Eddie," Lydia bawled. Eddie's thinking lurched to the right and he soothed, "Well the good thing is we are mismatched sufficiently to still make it as a compatible couple. We both love exploiting each other's bodies and you have a high tolerance of my irreverence and bumbling and share my desire for adventure and I love your softness and desire to be held special and your cultured familiarity with things that could interest me if I bother to put my mind to it. We should work to cohabit, that's what I think." Lydia sniffed, "Mother has resigned to the fact that I will be leaving her. She owns a house in Plymouth where the tenancy runs out at the end of the month and she says we can have that for as long as we wish but she needs to know my answer so she can instruct the agent." "Well yes, I'll live there with you and contribute to the rent. Plymouth is a big city and so I ought to find work there no problem." "God you are so optimistic. Most English guys would say but what if I can't find work." "But not all English guys." "No Eddie and I admire you for being fair about that. Um what is your view about me wanting to immigrate to Australia?" "It would send me over the moon. I would nominate you as an immigrant." "Oh thank you. Mummy says she has contacts in high places that could assist with my application." Eddie said he had a friend who'd met an Irish girl when touring Ireland. He took her back to Australia and they got married and she was allowed to stay on a different class of visa that after two years could convert into permanent residency on approval. "Why are you telling me that?" "Because I could take you to Australia as my fiancée and we marry and two years later you have permanent residency, problem over." "Would you wish to do that?" "Yeah I reckon so. You have money and could buy a business and I'd work for you." "I prefer saying work with me rather than for me. Oooh this has made me really excited. What do you think we should do?" "I'd like to take you to Australia tomorrow but I guess we should be caution, or rather a little patient Lydia. Let's live together in Plymouth for say two months and by then or even before then we will have worked out where we want to be and whether that is with one another. If you don't mind spending the money we could go to Sydney and you meet my folk and have a good look around to see if you like Sydney sufficiently to wish to live there." "Oh yes, let's do it that what. What a marvelous plan. You are so intelligent." "Um don't get too carried away Lydia. I'm just good at working some things out, that's all." "Oooh could you take Friday off and come and stay here for a long week end. I haven't had sex since you left." "You really are intelligent Lydia. Yes I'll arrive Thursday night in time for late dinner. * * * UPDATE: Lydia and Eddie live in Sydney and get married next Saturday. She suspects she's pregnant and will look into that after the wedding. She purchased half of Eddie's father's business, Eddie's parents lending him the money to purchase half ownership of the other half. Eddie is busily expanding the business on capital provided by Lydia who heads administration. Lydia has been astonished at the wide range of Eddie's close friends who include a female who owns a big learn-to-sail school, two males who are lawyers an ex-girlfriend who's a senior lecture in fine arts at Sydney University and who is now Lydia's best friend in Australia. Lydia is so happy and Eddie is proud of how well Lydia is assimilating into her new environment. THE END