2 comments/ 17630 views/ 1 favorites My Adorable Protégé By: Egmont Grigor There is one in every office – the person who doesn't get dates and is not even asked to go for coffee with his or her own same sex colleagues. Bunny Richards was the girl like that in our office and it easy to see why she was 'invisible'. How's this for starters: she's shy, short, skinny, wears scant make-up and non-descript clothes and blushes terribly whenever one of us cracks a sexy joke or engages in disgusting repartee. It also doesn't help her being the only female in the office with thirteen male co-workers. I'm Vinnie Hagen her supervisor and this is my story about how I helped Bunny find true romance. At the time of this story I was shagging Viv who works at the mall and Peggy who manages a women's apparel shop. Viv and Peggy have never met, and I worked damn hard to ensure it stayed that way! Know what I mean? So I sits at my desk smoking a joint (just kidding, I was chewing the end of my pencil) looking at Bunny and thinking she was a damn hard worker, probably the most productive of all of us. Of course, she lives at home, goes to bed early and isn't screwing so has tons of energy to put into work, doesn't she? Bunny looks up, sees me watching her and turns pink. I flick my comb through my hair and wink at her, and she turns red. So I cup my imaginary breasts and jiggle them. She turns scarlet and flees the room. That girl really does have problems. At lunchtime that same day the staff café is very full and I see Bunny standing holding her tray looking at the only empty seat near where she'd standing. It's right next to me, so I wave to her, and she turns away and stares at the ceiling. So I go over, grab the tray from her and encourage her to follow by saying, "Don't be stupid, follow me and take this vacant seat." It was an inauspicious start, actually, but that's how Bunny became my protégé, which was very much to her advantage. She always wore bright colored dresses, so I advised her to wear black and any shade of blue as that seems to take the emphasis of shortness off short women. Also she was told to get out of those ridiculously high platform shoes and acknowledge her shortness is forever and that whatever she has on her feet she'd still be short. I could see that she was trying to get away as she kept looking at the exit but I decided to keep up the pressure. I asked her out for a drink after work – it was Friday. Oh boy, did she panic. You would be excused for thinking I'd asked her for a fuck. She turned crimson and her mouth opened and shut repeatedly; she was vocally muted as if struck down by some terrible disease out of an abandoned former French Colony. I became sympathetic: "Well, do you want to come or not?" She shrugged, pointed to her mouth. So I passed across my unfinished glass of juice which she sipped, almost gargled with, and then swallowed. "Thank you, Vincent." The bitch, using that foul name my parents had tossed on to me before divorcing. But at least she'd re-fired her vocal engine. I wondered if it were the first time in the history of mankind that a woman had failed to say something after opening her mouth? "I really would like to accept your kind invitation but I am stricken with apprehension, for you see, I've never before been invited on a real date and I've never been into a bar. That explains why just now I was overcome with anxiety that my etiquette and general behavior may be inappropriate." Date? I had no idea who'd provoked that thought in her mind, but it wasn't me. I attempted to ease her fears about bar drinking. "Look bunny, these are the rules: Don't get into fights; don't get caught shagging in the men's restroom; if you're going to vomit aim for the potted palms – that's why there're there. And don't worry about passing out, I'll take you home, if I remember to pick you up when I'm leaving." Bunny looked decidedly relieved, saying it appeared that everything was well organized and she would consider it an honor to be under my experienced wing. I then mentioned that my friends Rex, Antonio and Philip would be there with us. "But I'm not into gang bangs," she whispered, turning sheet white. "Aw, no-one is into GB's these days," I replied, trying to think of a convincing rebuttal. "Guys have taken an intellectual approach to where they put it about and it has been proven conclusively that it is sexually inefficient standing about waiting for your turn." "That seems a reasonable approach. I am very much relieved." I smiled, took her hand and kissed it with amazing delicacy for me. I said gravely: "Your virginity is safe in my hands" without meaning to be so ambiguous. "I'm not a virgin." You could have knocked me over with a feather. Who in the world would have gotten into her knickers? I would be fascinated to hear that story and here was I thinking that I'd have to find a way of teaching her that there was more than one use for that mid-frontal orifice. Me and the boys stayed for our usual three hours, drinking more than our share of beer and yet again cleaning out the bar of free peanuts. Bunny had lasted an hour before she looked pie-eyed after three margaritas so I put her in a cab and she was coherent enough to give the driver her address. She thanked me for "a chipper of an evening" and we waved instead of kissing. We guys left together and walked home as it was nearby and as it happened we share an apartment. Without anything being said, Bunny and I began lunching together every day. I got a bit nervous and told her I had a girl friend, actually two, and she had enough courage to tell me it was awful of me to be sharing my affections. I just grinned and said I had enough to share around and she laughed and called me a naughty boy. I was so encouraged about that – obviously she was capable of interacting socially including conversationally like a normal person. But those clothes! She'd taken my advice and was now exclusively dressed in either black or blue, but only dresses and they looked like horse covers. So by appointment one afternoon after work I took Bunny to meet Peggy. I introduced them and left them at it, Peggy agreeing to spend an hour giving Bunny her views on overall dress sense, then specific advice. Bunny came to work next day in a usual boxy dress but was highly excited. She told me that Peggy was such a charming woman that she was amazed that I could two-time Peggy. I gave Bunny my handsome sullen look and she called me a naughty boy. I was aware, then, that Bunny was growing on me, somewhat – like a little sister I guess. As it was Friday we were to meet the boys at the bar, but Bunny said she'd meet me there as Peggy had ordered in a new dress and some other things for her. We'd already sunk three beers each when Bunny arrived. Antonio saw her first and went "Wow!" and we turned around to take a look at presumably a big-tit blonde who'd winked at him. But no, it was just Bunny. But glory be, what a bunny! She was in a black lace dress, scooped low in the front, short at the bottom. Oh, my. The girl actually had tits and cute freckles over the expanse above them. Her tits, er, boobs, were encased in a bright silky red bra with no effort being made to hide the bra; it could be seen through the lace as was the slip thing below it, and the top of the bra was out above the top of her dress but looked perfectly natural as if it were meant to be like that. Then Bunny began sipping her first Margarita with pride while we just looked at her in awe as she sat on the stool, knees slightly parted and a patch of bright silky red panties tyere for all to see. We could also see a patch of white flesh above the stocking tops – stockings, not panty hose! We'd gotten used to it and began talking, me noticing the conversations we had were no longer exclusively about dames, sport and booze. They were still discussed, of course, we are only human, but the guys were asking Bunny for cooking tips and we were talking about music and holiday spots of the world and books. Books? I thought the guys only read wank magazines but between them they could keep a pretty good conversation going with Bunny about A-list books and A-list authors. This was truly amazing and I found myself adding my pennyworth. She astounded us that evening by coming out and being so knowledgeable about cars, although she didn't own one but had two brothers who were fanatical. When I returned from the restroom, Antonio whispered that Philip had invited Bunny out to dinner the following nigh and she'd accepted. Although anger swept through me this did not surprise me as I had already accepted that I was becoming possessive of Bunny. I had decided to control it and this date would assist me to do that as it posed a real challenge. The climate around Bunny, my Bunny, was certainly changing. When she finished her third drink and went out to flag down a taxi, all four of us went out. We lined up; she solemnly kissed all four of us on the cheek, having to stand on tip-toes to reach mine because I was easily the tallest. That's why I though it was appropriate for her to go out with Philip; he is five-six, only a couple of inches taller. We were rather quiet back in the bar until a big-tit redhead walked in and acknowledge our leers with a cute wave, which got us revved up again. The next evening I sent Philip back to change into a suit and back again to polish his shoes. Bunny would be dressing up and so should he, "It should be you taking her out," he grumbled. "She's your protégé." My protégé; what the fuck was he talking about? No-one was supposed to know, not even Bunny that I was secretly working to coax her out of her shell. I heard Philip arrive home just before 2:00. That was very, very late for dinner; they must have gone to a hotel and taken a short-term room. I was upset and immediately recognized this thing that was twisting my insides – jealously. I should have been ashamed, as I had no claim, but my mind wouldn't allow me to acknowledge that. Fortunately next morning when I emerged for breakfast, my jealously had gone. I asked Philip how the evening went and he said only one word, "Magnificently". I felt no reaction, and was glad about that. On Sunday afternoon, as arranged, I met Bunny at the mall and introduced her to an acknowledged outstanding beautician, Vivian Maitland. "This is Viv Maitland, Bunny. Her husband is a heart surgeon and she is famous at making women beautiful." I then left them. I'd wanted to pay Viv for an hour's session, which was quite big money. But after I gave her a précis of Bunny's story, and the reason for my involvement, she kissed me, started working on my cock to get it up again, and said: "Bring the dear girl in at 2:00 on Sunday and I'll give her a complimentary two-hour session." Viv is a beautiful woman, not only to look at. On Monday morning – I'll never forget it. Bunny came in late – by arrangement. She'd been at the hairdressing salon of one of Viv's friends. There was dead silence in the room when the last keyboarding stopped – we work in software development. Everyone was looking at Bunny removing her electronic card from the time clock. Her scruffy and long brown hair was gone; it had been slashed short and dyed black. She turned and I almost wet myself, truly. She looked magnificent: shaped eyebrows, longer eyelashes, no apparently flaws on her facial skin. She looked up a smiled at us staring band of guys with only a slight flush; she walked passed me to her desk at the back of the room, leaving a trail of perfume. Freddie Welsh started it, clapping. We all joined in and this time our nicely polished little beauty was beetroot red, on the verge of crying. "Back to work guys," I called. "Give the lovely lady a break." At lunchtime Bunny talked to me non-stop – that Viv was the most beautiful woman with the best personality she'd ever come across and asking how could I two-time her. Bunny said she was felt she was changing inwardly as well as outwardly and this had been largely due to me, that I was a most magnificent man and that I should be married to someone, preferable Viv, and raising lots of wonderful children who would take after their parents. My face was beetroot red and it was me flicking glances to the exit door. On Tuesday she went out to dinner with Antonio; Rex had her on Wednesday and probably bed as well, as he was an acknowledged seducer of women. None of the guys discussed their evening out with Bunny, and that suited me fine. I didn't want to punch any or all of them if they bad-mouthed my protégé. Then on Thursday of that week a dreadful thing happened. Mr Burns the general manager called me up and presented me with a proposition that was impossible to refuse. I returned to the office saying that I been appointed assistant general manager of the company's eastern branch, effective in a fortnight's time. The gang cheered and some wits asked to be transferred with me. Feeling mortally wounded I looked down to Bunny's corner and she waved happily and blew me a kiss. My heart was torn, but I knew she was ready to fly. Rex, Antonio and Philip would be around for support and would probably insist she stick with them on Friday nights until she got engaged. Amazingly, at least to me, by then Bunny had casual friendships going with Viv and Peggy and in recent weeks had occasionally joined Viv and me or Peggy and me when were dined out, at the insistence of either Viv or Peggy. It became obvious that Bunny has it all; she probably was simply a late starter and just needed that push from someone to get her to come to terms with her height. Me and Bunny? Not a show – she's five-four and I'm six-three; she's just twenty and I'm thirty-one. At the bar the next night I shouted champagne and the bar manager gave us a huge tray of expensive nuts. Bunny had only one glass of champagne and then went on to juice. She turned and whispered to me that she'd been waiting and waiting for me to ask her out to dinner alone, with no invitation forthcoming. Therefore she was taking me to a hotel for dinner and that was the reason why she was not drinking any more champagne – she wanted to last through the whole night. I was pleased; it was so lovely of her. Then it hit me. She said she wanted to last through the whole night – she said night, not evening. There's a distinct difference between those terms and possible enormous implications. I just didn't know what to think. I looked at her; she was talking cars to Philip and Antonio while Rex was saying something to me. Then she winked at me. My nuts felt as if they were on a Ferris wheel. A little before 7:30 Bunny walked out the bar to flag down a cab, winking at me to avoid me wondering what had happened to our dinner date. We lined up and she began the kissing routine, Philip first, me the tallest last. We males all watched suspiciously to see if anyone was getting more than a peck on the cheek, but a peck on the cheek was what everyone got. But a piece of paper was pressed into my hand. Returning to the bar I told the guys that I had a date, and needed to go home to shower and dress up. "Oooooh," they chorused. "A third bird to complete the triangle," said Antonio which was rather personal so we other three pretended we didn't know what he was on about. I read the note as soon as I got outside: 'Dinning room, Hotel New Horizons, 9:00. My treat. XXXXX'. What a lovely invitation and beautifully expressed, I thought. My protégé has come of age. My heart stood still when the maitre-de escorted her to the table. I'd dressed in my tuxedo, feeling a little foolish and wondering if I would be over-dressed – but no, she was in a sheath evening gown of mixed gold and silver that seemed to subdue her boobs – but then I saw the slit – right up to her right hipbone and through it I caught a glimpse a high-heeled shoe that seemed to be made of glass, but these days it would be Perspex or something similar. She looked magnificent for a short, skinny, easily embarrassed girl with underdeveloped social skills – only she'd left that life behind. She still was short and a little skinny (though filling out) but she brimmed with social graces including elegant deportment. She was a young lady, definitely a lady. I felt so proud of her. I rose, standing tall, a warm smile on my face. The maitre-de pulled out her chair and waited for her to move over it, but she floated on to me. I turned, held out my arms and bent down and kissed her; she offered her lips rather than her cheeks. Poor me. I was hopelessly besotted. I kissed those lips, felt her warmness, inhaled her perfume and discharged into my underpants. I was reeling with ardor and embarrassment, the ardor more acute than the embarrassment. With profound simplicity I whispered a confession: "Whoops, I've just blown my nuts." What had come over me I don't know. She could have slapped me, she could have stalked off in anger, or perhaps I was banking on the fact that she wouldn't have a clue what I was talking about. Anyway, did it matter? If I were meeting my destiny I would meet my destiny, come Hell or high water. Bunny looked up at me, eyes flashing. "You ejaculated without me touching you? I am honored my darling, but please save some for later." She hadn't whispered that. I looked at the maitre-de, still holding the chair; he was fighting to keep a straight face. But I didn't care – she'd just called me her darling. I got my feet back on to the ground and we had a splendid meal, the staff being really attentive. Several times I noticed the maitre-de clicking his fingers to send a minion our way, a half smile-half smirk on his face. It was our first and perhaps our last meal together – our Last Supper. We conversed harmoniously liked two perfectly socially balanced adults, enjoying ourselves and, each in our own way, we pretended to ignore this increasing potency of sexual sensuality sweeping across our minds like a mist coming off the sea. We neither touched nor exchanged what writers of romance novels call 'sultry looks'. We had this long overdue fusion through close contact for almost ninety minutes, consuming two courses and almost one bottle of wine, when the waitress took Bunny's order for Triple Chocolate Delight and for me Rhubarb and Strawberry Compote with Fromage Blanc Mousse. Bunny instructed that those orders and a pot of coffee be delivered to Room 214 and we left the restaurant, heading for the elevators. As the doors of the elevator closed we turned and fell against each other, hugged and kissed. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Bunny asked and I nodded with a huge smile, noting for the first time just how light blue were her eyes. I kissed those eyes and left her practically purring as we separated when the bell dinged, signaling we'd arrived at our floor. Getting comfortable in the executive-class room, we kissed and cuddled, waiting for our food to arrive, knowing once it was delivered we would be left on our own for the night. At one stage Bunny confessed she was not very sexually experienced but promised to do her best. I chuckled, said something soothing and looking at the ornate cluster of metallic gold and frosted glass of the central lights in the ceiling, quite a work of art. While I gazed at the lights I thought that there would be several men who'd known her carnally. For a start, the original taker of her cherry, and to my knowledge Philip, Antonio and certainly Rex. "The music master at High School took my virginity when we were away on a music competitions trip," she said. "He did so with my consent and was very careful and kind but of course he was known amongst us a deflowering specialist." After that there only had been two others – a cousin and then the manager of the office she worked at before she came to our firm. My Adorable Protégé "What about Antonio, Philip and certainly Rex?" I blurted before realizing my indiscretion. But Bunny handled it well. Looking slightly shocked she said gazing straight at me, "Antonio and Philip pressured me but of course I turned them down. Dear Rex, it really was a physical effort to get him off the boil and behaving himself again. "How could I succumb to their advances and be loyal to you?" I was almost surprised that she should give me credit for being able to understand such a moral issue, a subtle concept indeed because there had been absolutely no understanding of personal attachment between us, at least not that I was aware of until now. "You considered yourself attached to me on a higher level than the more casual attachment you had with Philip, Rex or Antonio?" "Yes." "You concealed that well?" Bunny, sitting on my knees with my hand down the front of her dress but still outside her bra, began stroking the arm of the chair we were sitting in as she considered her response. "It was necessary for me to do so as I did not wish to risk rejection. I realized very early on that you were worth loving because there was something about you inconsistent with what you appeared to be. "Superficially you project the awful image of a heartless seducer of women and indeed your general attitude could be described as debonair and at times shamelessly arrogant." I cringed as many times my mother has lectured me along those lines. Now comes the time for Bunny to put the boot in! "You took pity on me and I sensed that I should respond, that you were experienced and confident and being my department supervisor might have the attributes needed to extract me from my shell. Until then I'd always thought my White Knight would be female." I kissed Bunny below her ear and she squirmed, but kept on talking. "I soon realized I was reacting favorably to you and that first Friday night I spent with you four guys drinking was one of the most enjoyable social occasions I've ever experienced; it was as if I'd found my wings, if you know what I mean." I nodded, thinking we were really getting into this deeply when we should be frolicking as a prelude to sex. But then I forget all about that, because she said something very profound. "Initially I was appalled that you were two-timing Viv and Peggy, but then I saw the way in which you interacted with each of them, that you respected them and they respected you and it suits both of them just to have a little piece of you. In learning that I had to admire you for your enterprise and your frankness in revealing their existence to me when you thought there was a possibility of me going soft on you." I cut in: "I had to, the possibility of dating a panel of three women was rather mind blowing – just keeping two apart is hard work." "I guess so, but here's what I wanted to say: "I really think that you have treated Viv and Peggy so well that I believe even if they learned about the existence of the other in your life, in all probability they would want to ignore that revelation and continue on regardless." "You really believe that?" I asked, standing up and depositing Bunny on the sofa and then moving off to answer the knock at the door. "Yes, and it's a huge accolade for you, Vinnie." A trolley carrying our desserts, coffee, cups and saucers and two complimentary miniatures of brandy and brandy glasses was wheeled in and then we were alone with the door locked for the night. "Plug in the coffee warmer and leave everything there," Bunny said softly. I turned and saw she was sitting relaxed on the sofa, one arm resting along the back of it; she was no longer wearing her sheath dress. I quickly removed my shoes, tuxedo jacket and bow tie and strode over, flopping against her, thrusting my head against her bra and growling like Father Bear. She squealed. We kissed and stroked each other's face, ran fingers through hair, kissed hands and shoulders as if reluctant to go the next step. Me, Vincent Augustus Hagen shy? Get away with you! It was just that I thought it best not to rush Bunny. Finally she reached behind her back, undid her bra and tossed it across the room. Then she grabbed me and inserted her tongue into my mouth gently. She told my afterwards the crotch of her panties was soaking and she was embarrassed that I'd find this out before I was warmed up, so she had to take the initiative. "Let's have a look at these tits of yours, or would you prefer I call them breasts or boobs?" "No, I have no problem with the word tits," she replied sweetly. "It sounds, well, more exciting than breasts. I want you to call them tits and you can use that other word that men like to use when you get lower down." "Bellybutton?" I teased. "No, you silly cunt," she giggled, hand over her mouth. Boy, was this babe interesting, I thought, really tuned into her. Being a rather basic guy, I was aware I'd majored in accountancy in my degree rather than in philosophy or the correct naming of female body parts for when engaging in prudent sexual intercourse. I moved in closer to examine these cute breasts and found them to be more than a good handful. I licked a nipple and there was no adverse reaction. So far so good. I moved back to get a wider landscape view but her hand made contact with the back of my head and I realized I was being encouraged to go to ground. So I opened wide and placed my mouth over a nipple, flicking my tongue wildly. The hand at the back of my head appeared to be pushing harder so I closed my mouth quite a bit and began sucking, producing a soft moan from her. As I sucked her other hand clasped the back of my right hand and she entwined figures; then a few seconds later she dropped my hand just below her bellybutton. I'm really not thick, so I slid it down under her panties, over a a tuff of hair and then on to a very smooth patch. At that point my hand felt a bit like Noah's Ark – it was in a sea of cuntal moisture. Boy, was this babe Bunny ready! I paused, trying to figure out my next move, considering that licking her cunt might disgust her. "I need you," she said, biting my ear almost hard enough to bring water to my eyes. So I took a short cut. Leaving my trousers on to save time I unzipped, eased out The Pocket Rocket with some difficulty and rubbed him into her juice after pulling the crotch of her pants to one side. "Do I need a condom?" I whispered, hoping she had some if she insisted that I did. But she shook her head saying she was protected against pregnancy and if I was confident I didn't have any nasties, I should get on with it. Get on with it? Most of my life I'd rebelled against people giving me such an instruction but in this situation it was like music to my ears. I got a finger against her cunt and slowly worked it in, feeling her lifting her body to meet it. That was an excellent sign; good girl. Oh boy, this one was going to be tight – I hoped the extra friction didn't get me away too soon and so disappoint her. After digging the finger in deep and wiggling it around aimlessly, I eased it out and went up and touch her clit, brushing the nub which was a little beauty, though I had little time to digest that finding because she'd almost succeeded in bucking me off. That indicated to me that she was liable to go off any minute and apparently she thought so too because her hand was around my tool, pulling it towards her cunt quicker than I could follow. That meant I was forced to shuffle forward to catch up and with that momentum it went in an was almost fully in before I'd realized what was happening. She almost scared the crap out of me going Blaaaaaaaaah! "God, you're big," she panted. Really? Initially with Viv, she'd asked was there anything I could do to get it bigger, especially thicker. Well, this was a change but as I'd thought earlier, Bunny was rather tight. So there we were, in Ye Olde missionary position which really is not something I usually offer and I'm rather athletically inclined. Well, we worked up the push and shove routine into reasonable tempo and I bent my long back excessively to rub and suck her tits (which she loved) while I continued pumping. Whenever I eased the bend on my back by moving up to kiss her, she gradually turned the kiss into an partly open mouth tonguing, which rather turns me on. She was very good at it – persistent, slow and agile. I was pleased that our big difference in height was not a real impediment. She helped with her liveliness and stretching up to be kissed. By now we were both aware that her cunt fitted me like a glove, a tight glove. Bunny's panting had increased so I got a finger to her clit and did a few gentle taps on the nub. By then she was puffing and going red and was allowing me to rub the nub without going wild, which was a help as I was busy lifting the tempo of our thrusting. She moaned as she was hit, apparently, by a multi-wave orgasm as I felt her vagina tighten even more around my dick. My balls churned and I chortled, "Here I come!" "Aaaaaaaaaaaah," I went, although a cry was not necessary, I always produce it for the benefit of my partner. Over the next few seconds a series a ejaculations went deep into her vagina and she encouraged the blasts by murmuring, "Thank you, thank you repeatedly, and didn't stop until I flopped down on her. "That was gorgeous," she puffed, looking red, sweaty and very happy. "You were really awesome," I complimented, and really she was; she'd done everything right. We rested, had a pee and went to bed to eat our deserts. I went head to tail – me with my head at the bottom of the bed – so I could watch her eating while chatting. I learned that she really liked sex; providing I was not too rough and not depraved, I could do what I wanted with her. Well, she'd finished her dessert, and I wanted mine – so I took a small handful and plastered it around her cunt. She caught on immediately and giggled and bucked. I smeared a trail up and then plastered her tits and mouth. Then I started eating my dessert which left us both in a mess and just before I came again doing another missionary I pulled out and sprayed her tits. She loved that and we both licked her clean. It was late but we chatted on and then I asked her the big one: "Come East with me." She smiled joyously and answered simply. "Yes, I'd like that." What a babe. I decided then that I'd give it three months and if we were still in tune I would propose. However, such intentions don't always go to plan. We've been out East for exactly one month, and today is the first day of our honeymoon, here in Hawaii. We've having a great time and rarely do the missionary these days. Vinnie and Bunny – that combination had sounded a bit daft. Her real name is Bonnie and mine is Vincent and neither wanted to revert, so we decided to live with Vinnie and Bunny. So, here we are: my little darling is beginning to stir so catch you later. By the way, we have our own swimming pool on the deck of our fourth floor apartment back home. Bunny likes to try to get me off with her feet when we come out to the pool. She's got pretty good at it and when she gets me off she positions her feet to get the right angle so when I ejaculate the cum wads land on her. In that position she's flat on her back and we are 'feet to cock', so to speak. I've promised to pay her a thousand bucks if doing a foot fuck she can land a dollop of my cum in her mouth without moving her head. Just lately she's got a couple of wads to land on her neck. The thousand bucks are stuffed into a round biscuit tin in the kitchen, waiting to be claimed. Here's hoping. Sex can be such great fun when you're flexible and inventive. Oh – one other thing: we're pregnant.