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Meant to Be Ch. 03

By: jerseyblue



Victoria Scottsdale could not make sense of what was happening to her. Since her husband, Robin, was lost in the skies over France over three years ago, she hadn't allowed herself to take an interest in anything. She worked at the flower shop but really didn't care about it. She lived with her mother and was involved in many of the activities in Duckworth but overall it was a dull and boring life. She accepted that and was resigned to spend the rest of her life that way.

In many ways she was like the young girls in the village; trapped in Duckworth, with very little chance of ever getting out. Vicki thought of Bridget Monahan, the town's teacher. Bridget was a bright, cheerful young lady who always had a smile and kind word when they met. Bridget wasn't the type to give up hope. She was going to find a bright young man and go places, away from here.

Vicki sighed, just like myself 6 or 7 years ago. She remembered meeting Robin, the whirlwind romance and the exciting life they had together. She was in love with the idea of being in love. It was like a dream that should have never ended. But it did and she hid away the pain now by saying she didn't care about anything.

Then Aaron Williams walked, rather crashed into her life and all that seemed to end. There was something about him that intrigued her, excited her. It was foolish as she knew next to nothing about him. Yet she found herself thinking about him, from time to time. She wanted to know more about him but she tried to convince herself that it was unimportant. He said the next time he could be free, he would stop and see her. She found herself looking forward to that time.

"Hello, Mrs. Scottsdale," Bridget said as she entered the shop. "I need some flowers to brighten up my classroom. You know what I mean." 

"Yes, I do," Vicki replied. "I have just the ones."

Vicki led Bridget over some fresh cut flowers. "I think these will do."

As the two stood at the counter, Vicki looked over Bridget. The young girl was dressed in a light blue dress that accented her figure. Bridget was a little heavier than her but in all the right places. She could see why men might be attracted to her. Also Bridget was bright, not like some of town's young girls. Vicki could sense that Aaron might like that. She didn't know why she was doing it but she felt the need to size up the girl. Plus she might learn something about Aaron.

"Didn't I see you walking with a young man about 2 weeks ago? Someone special?" Vicki handed her the flowers. 

"I hope so, Mrs. Scottsdale," Bridget answered. Her voice gave away how she really felt. "He's a pilot at the air base. An American."

"Really," Vicki said. "Do you know anything else about him? I mean, you wouldn't want to rush things, would you?"

"No, no, it's not like that. He went to Princeton University and he knows a lot about English literature. His favorite author is Sir Walter Scott. Mine's Jane Austin. He is the first man who seems to care about what I like. He treats me nice."

"That's important, Bridget. You deserve that. Men like that are hard to find."

Bridget leaned over the counter and said softly. "You know a lot more about these things than I do, you know, being married. Can I ask you a personal question?"

Vicki became flustered and she blushed. Was she going to ask about sex? O Lord, how could she answer the girl about that? Robin was the only man she ever made love to. It was nice but she really didn't know better. Robin seemed satisfied but in the back of her mind she wondered if he wanted more.

Bridget noticed the confused look on Vicki's face. "Oh no, Mrs. Scottsdale, it isn't about that!" Now it was Bridget's turn to blush.

"That's a relief." Vicki laughed. "I don't know if I'd be much help with that. So what's your question?"

"Last week when Aaron came over we were supposed to go out. I had a nice dress all picked and everything. Instead he wanted to stay in. He didn't care that I wasn't dressed or anything. He told me I looked nice any way. Then he cooked dinner for us. Wouldn't let me doing anything. He waited on me. I never heard of man doing that for a woman. What do you make of that?"

Vicki laughed again. "Bridget, I think you found quite a young man there."

Sixteen missions in the book and their luck still held. No one had been hit yet and "Tantalizing Take-off" was still in one piece. On the last flight, a bombing run over a marshalling yard on the outskirts of Paris, the crew had its first serious problem. After dropping their load, "Tantalizing Take-off" was hit by flak in the outboard starboard engine. A fire broke out and the prop began to run wild. Aaron calmly hit the extinguisher for the engine. Fire quickly went out. The next step was to feather the prop. Again Aaron took all the right steps and it stopped turning.

Good thing it was a short distance to the Channel and there was fighter cover because the loss of power and the drag the prop caused them to fall behind the formation. Then over the coast No. 3 engine began to run rough and the oil pressure fell. It was only 20 minutes to the field but it was the longest 20 minutes Aaron ever had as a pilot. He brought the big bomber in smoothly and as it taxied to a stop he let out a long breath.

"Nice job! Aaron," Archer said patting him on the back. "It looked a little rough there but I knew you pull us through."

Aaron smiled back. He didn't dare tell him that he was scared to death that they might not make it. "Give me a minute. I want to check a few things."

"Sure. See you at the briefing. I knew you do it."

Aaron released his hands slowly from the wheel. They were shaking and he broke into a cold sweat. How many more times could he continue to fool Archer and his crewmates? He knew how lucky they had been. It couldn't last forever.

Vicki opened the door. "Aaron, what are you doing here?"

"You said it was alright for me to see again. So here I am."

"Yes, I know I did but..." her voice trailed off.

"Did I come at a bad time?"

"No, no." She invited him inside. "It's just that tonight is the night I go with my mother to the local hall for the monthly dance."

"Good evening, Lieutenant," Vicki's mother came up next to her daughter.

"Good evening, ma'am."

"Mother, I was just telling him about your dance and he was just leaving."

"Nonsense, dear." Her mother turned to Aaron. "Young man, I would like you to accompany us. Nothing but a bunch of old fuddy-duddies there anywhere. Besides it would good for Vicki to have a man closer to her own age to talk to."

"Mother!" Vicki exclaimed.

"I'd be delighted," Aaron said extending his arm.

It was a short walk to the hall and she was right. The men were all over 50 easily. That is if you didn't count the ones between 13-16. It seems the teenagers like to attend because it gave them an opportunity to dance and have fun. The older folks didn't mind as they were well behaved and added a little life to the place.

The band was the same mix, old and young. They played all types of music, all easy to dance to and all slightly off key.

Vicki headed over to the large table off to one side. Aaron followed behind her. On the table were a large punch bowl, some pastries, some finger sandwiches, and a big urn of hot coffee.

"I thought coffee was hard to get," Aaron whispered to Vicki.

"It is but see that man over there." She pointed to an older man standing across the room. To Aaron he looked a little like Victor McLaglen. "He knows people. So every dance, he says he will provide the coffee and here it is. Nobody asks."

Aaron helped Vicki with refreshments and watched the people dance. Those who spoke to Vicki seemed to address her with upmost politeness.

After about an hour, a young girl, about 16, came up to Vicki. "Mrs. Scottsdale, will be alright if we ask the Lieutenant to dance?"

Vicki looked at Aaron and laughed. "Why don't you ask him?"

Aaron looked at Vicki.

"This young lady would like to dance with you?"

"Well, I don't know."

"Go. What can it hurt?"

The young girl grabbed Aaron's hand and led him out on the dance. One of the youngsters signaled the band and it broke in an enthusiastic version of "In the Mood." The teenagers took over the dance floor, all dancing their steps to the jitterbug. Aaron started to dance with the one girl but it seemed all wanted to dance to him. They cut each other until a circle formed around him and his latest partner. It seemed the music would never end but Aaron danced with them all.

Vicki stood behind the table and watch. She began to laugh at the show; so hard tears rolled down her cheeks.

As the music ended and the people applauded at his antics, Aaron staggered over to Vicki. "What's so funny," he gasped and scooped a cup of punch. "Don't laugh, you're next!"

He reached out and pulled her around the table.

"No, Aaron, no." 

"Come on."

The band played a quieter, slower song, one the older folks could dance to. Aaron held Vicki's left hand and reached around, placing his hand on the small of her back. She tensed up.

"Relax," he said quietly, "Just follow me." He pushed gently on back, moving her closer. Their bodies touched.

Vicki hadn't danced with a man in over 4 years. She and Robin had danced plenty of times during their marriage. At first she loved to dance but Robin never liked to. He wasn't very good at it and Vicki believed this was why he didn't like to. He wanted to be the best at everything he did.

Aaron moved effortlessly around the dance. He was easy to follow. More they danced, the more she relaxed. She looked up at him and smiled. 

"That's it. You're great," he said.

Just the slightest pressure on her back encouraged her to move closer. She didn't resist. Vicki snuggled in closer. Aaron could feel her warmth through her light cotton dress and smell her perfume. It wasn't the flowers, it was her.

When the music ended, Vicki took a second to break the embrace. As she did, Aaron noticed her face was flush. "Are you all right?"

"Yes but it seems a little warm in here."

The band was rising out of their seats indicating the evening was drawing to a close. People began to exit, saying their good-byes. Two of the teenage girls came over to say good-bye to Aaron and thank him for a great time.

"Looks like you have some admirers," Vicki said.

Aaron shrugged.

They walked back to the house. Standing on the porch together, Aaron made to say his good night. 

"Wait," Vicki said. "It's a warm night and the sky is clear. Would you like to sit on our swing in the back? Its early." She almost said please.

They walked around back and sat on the swing. Vicki pulled up her legs and sat Indian style, facing hm. "Tell me about the States. Better yet, tell me about you."

Aaron told her about his family, his father who was a small town doctor, and his mother, a simple housewife. He had two younger sisters; the older of the two a senior in high school now. 

As he talked, Vicki could tell by his voice how much he loved his family. And he did, she moved closer, to be nearer.

"Look, a shooting star," he said pointing skyward.

She twisted to see it. "Where?"

"You missed it."

Vicki moved so she leaning against him, her legs stretched on the swing. She rested one hand on his knee and pulled his arm over her shoulder, holding her to him. It felt good. She hadn't felt this way in a very long time, too long. She didn't realize how much she missed the feeling of a man's arms around her. But why Aaron? Why now?

They continued to talk. More stars fell and she didn't miss them.

Meant to Be Ch. 03-04



Chapter 3: Moving In

Adriana was thrilled: new job, new place, new city. Everything seemed to be going well...at last! She was moving in this week and Haylie, her friend and co-worker, was helping her. Haylie was a very nice girl and had befriended her immediately, which was a great thing being in a new city away from family and friends. Besides, the moving was taking a little bit longer than expected and she was glad Haylie was there to help. 

"Thanks a lot for everything you're doing for me, Haylie! If you weren't here, it'd take me all day to get done with this."     

"No problem, hon. Besides, I think I'll be hanging out here a lot! I bumped into one of your neighbors, or neighbor's friend, I think, and he was smoking hot!"   

"Really?"   

"Oh, yeah! Tall, big, dark hair, handsome. I don't know why but he looked kinda familiar to me." 

"Details, details! How did you meet 'im?"   

"Well, I was getting some boxes out of the car and he was there in the garage and offered to help me out. He was really nice and we chatted for a while but then his phone rang and he sorta had to go but he asked me my number before he took off!"   

"Good for you! Go figure, you come here to help me move in and end up meeting a guy...and a good-looking one!"   

"Yeah, I can't wait for his call...I really liked him! Besides, I haven't had a date in ages!" 

The rest of the day was rather uneventful: the girls spent a few hours opening boxes and arranging things in the apartment. Then, when it was early in the evening, Haylie got a call from the guy she'd met that day.   

"I can't believe he called you so soon...wow he's totally into you!"   

"You think so?"   

"Absolutely!!! So, what are you doing tonight?"   

"I don't know, he just told me we could meet at this new restaurant for dinner."   

"Good, then, go home, put on something really hot and call me tomorrow, okay?"   

"Promise!"   

Haylie was really excited when she left and Adriana was very happy for her, but she was tired too so she decided to take a shower and call it a day. 



Chapter 4: The Elevator

On Sunday morning, Adriana got a call from Haylie, who sounded extremely happy and went on and on about the great first date she'd had the previous night. Of course, Adriana wanted all the details and suggested meeting for brunch at a coffeeshop down the block. They agreed to meet there at eleven, which meant that she had plenty of time to take a shower and get dressed. She stayed in bed for another half hour and then forced herself out of it and into the shower. She was still tired from all the work of the previous day but felt really pleased with the way things were going on in her life. She smiled to herself, got dressed, grabbed her purse and left the apartment. 

She was waiting for the elevator when her phone rang: a text from Haylie saying she'd meet her in 20 minutes. She was texting her back and didn't notice the man who'd just left the apartment opposite hers and that was now standing barely two feet away behind her. 

He stayed behind her, staring at her. She was wearing a red top and knitted sweater, and jeans. She had long dark hair, shiny soft waves that ended in locks. He continued looking down and couldn't help biting his lower lip when he saw her hour glass figure and tight, perky butt. She was wearing heels but he guessed she was small, about 5'4. He couldn't help wondering what the rest of her looked like since he was very pleased with what he'd seen so far. 

The elevator doors opened and they both stepped inside. Adriana was busy putting her phone away and pushed the button for the lobby without looking up at the man. He smiled a little and kept on staring at her. He could see her profile now. She was slim but curvy: round perky breasts, flat stomach...but he couldn't really see her face from where he was standing without being too obvious. He stood next to her wondering what she felt like, what she smelled like, what she tasted like...He was lost in these thoughts when the doors closed and the elevator started going down. 

Suddenly, it stopped and shook violently. The violent motion sent them both against the wall and she screamed. The man had his back against the wall, his legs apart to help him keep his balance. Adriana had been thrown into his side of the elevator and was now in his arms. The elevator shook one more time and he spread his legs farther apart to keep his balance. They were now at the same eye level. She was standing between his legs, her hands on his broad shoulders, her lips slightly parted and her eyes squeezed shut. He could feel her trembling in fear and panting for air. Their lips were less than an inch apart and their bodies intertwined. He had both arms wrapped around her, one holding her tightly around her waist and the other one up her back. He softly touched her hair and confirmed what he'd thought, it felt like silk, and wondered about the rest of her: her pearly skin, the red lips, the color of her eyes...he hadn't had the chance to see them, so he had no idea what color they were... 

He was in a malfunctioning elevator wishing for it not to drop to the basement and die, and yet he was not as scared as he should. It was absolutely crazy but he couldn't help it. He had this beautiful woman in his arms with her eyes closed so he decided to do the logical thing: take a good long hungry look. She had the face of an angel...full red lips, rosy cheeks. Their chests were pressed together and he could see her breasts rising and falling as her breath kept increasing rapidly. God, he wanted to kiss her so badly it was going to take everything of him not to. He perceived her fragrance, some fruity scent...apple? And that made him want her even more and wonder if she tasted like apple as well. He was lost in his thoughts and in her when the elevator shook again. It made the spaghetti straps of her top and bra slide down exposing her pearly shoulder. He didn't know how but somehow his hand ended up on it and his fingers began stroking her skin, that soft silky skin of hers, just like he'd imagined it. Her eyes were open now and their color was brown, same as her hair, just like dark chocolate. She was shaking and looking into his eyes, completely vulnerable and incredibly sexy. That was it. He couldn't take it anymore. He was going to kiss this beauty...and if the elevator dropped to the basement, well, at least, he'd die a happy man! But right then, he heard the doors opening and saw a police officer stretching his arm out to them. "Everything's gonna be just fine. You don't have to worry anymore, we'll get you out in a minute. Just stay calm, ok?" 

Adriana stepped away from the man, or at least tried to, but he wouldn't let go of her. She tried again but he kept pulling her closer to him. She thought he was in shock so she looked into his eyes, smiled and spoke softly "Listen. Everything's going to be alright. The police are here now. So, why don't we get outta here? What do you say?" Actually, it had nothing to do with fear. He just didn't want to let go of her. He wanted her for himself but he knew that if he didn't let her go and get out of there, they'd all think he was a nutjob! So, he reluctantly let his arms drop, she took a few steps away from him and they were out of the elevator within minutes. 

There were police officers and paramedics ready to help. Luckily, the elevator hadn't dropped any farther than the 2nd floor and someone had called 911 when they'd heard Adriana screaming. 

They were in the hallway, paramedics asking all kinds of questions and making sure they were alright, when a tall dark-haired man appeared out of nowhere and made his way to the man sitting on the floor. 

"Jensen, are you ok? What the hell happened?" 

"Nothing...elevator malfunction...dropped a few floors...we're ok, though." 

"What? Are you sure?" 

"Yeah, the paramedics just checked on us and we're both fine. Wait, what are you doing here?" 

"I was gonna give you a ride...to pick up your new car, remember?" 

"Yeah, that's right. I forgot..." 

"Jen, are you sure you're alright?" 

"Sure, I told you, the paramedics said we're ok." 

"Right...then why do you keep saying 'we'?" 

"The girl and me." 

"What girl?" 

"The brunette." 

"Which brunette?" 

"Long wavy hair, kinda short..." 

Jensen stood up and looked around but couldn't spot her anywhere. He turned to one of the officers and asked about her. 

"Excuse me, sir. Where's the woman?" 

"What woman?" 

"The woman that was with me in the elevator. Where is she?" 

"Oh, yeah, she left. Looks like a friend of hers was here and they left together." 

Jensen sighed deeply and looked at Jared. 

"What is it?" 

"She's gone, man. She's gone...and I have no clue 'who' she is..." 





To Be Continued...

Please review!



Meant To Be Ch. 03



Kelsey stared blankly at the vegetables in front of her. She started to chop them, preparing a salad for dinner as her Dad grilled the steaks on the patio.

She had listened to the voicemail from David Fisher three times. She couldn't believe that such a well known photographer thought she had the kind of talent that was deserving of an internship at his studio. 

Kelsey sighed to herself, thinking about how such an amazing opportunity couldn't possibly have come at a worse time. Things between her and Nathan were just getting started, and it was already so good. She woke up and fell asleep each day, thinking about him and what was in store for them. She could definitely see their friendship and romance developing into a relationship, but she knew that it was going to take time. Time that she just didn't have now. She knew that Mr. Fisher wasn't going to wait around for an answer and that there would be hundreds of people waiting to jump at his offer. 

But Nathan. Nathan...

How could she possibly leave him behind, not knowing when or if she'd ever come back? 

Kelsey was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't even hear her Dad come in from the patio. She had stopped chopping the vegetables all together and was staring blankly at the counter, completely consumed with indecision. 

"Hey...you alright honey?" he asked, placing the food on the counter. 

Kelsey blinked herself back to reality and forced a smile. 

"Yeah. Yeah. I'm alright."

"You sure? You don't look alright."

Kelsey swallowed. "Dad, I need some advice."

Her father sat on a stool across from her. He leaned on his elbows. 

"Ok. Shoot." 

"Alright. Well, you know how I'm supposed to start my internship at Studio 16 downtown, right?"

Her Dad nodded. "Yeah, at the end of August?"

Kelsey nodded. "Yes. Well, I just got an invitation to start an internship for a really well known photographer named David Fisher."

"Well, if it's a better opportunity, then I think you should go for it, sweetie. They'll still have plenty of time to fill your spot at Studio 16 before the summer ends."

"Dad, David Fisher's studio is based out of New York City. That's where the internship is."

Her Dad exhaled heavily. She saw the nerves and anxiety on his face, even though he tried desperately to hide them. They were silent for a few moments while Kelsey's Dad tried to think of the best advice to give his young daughter.

"Kelsey, I'm not going to lie to you. The idea of sending my only child to New York City, indefinitely, absolutely terrifies me. Now, I know that you're a grown woman, and that you're smart and perfectly capable of taking care of yourself, but New York is a very different place, sweetie. Before you make any decisions, just promise me that you'll think it through. Don't jump on this just because it sounds exciting, ok? If you decide to go, your Mom and I will support you. But just remember that you need to weigh all of your options first, alright?"

Kelsey nodded in agreement. 

"Ok, Dad. I will. I promise."

"So, this David Fisher? He's pretty well known, huh?"

"Yeah. He does some major ad campaigns and has photographed all kinds of celebrities. He's really great. I'll have to show you some of his work sometime."

"How did he hear about you?"

"One of my Professors, Mr. Powell. He must have some kind of connection. I'm not sure exactly. I just got the call today while I was next door. I'm actually still in shock, I think."

"Well, just so you know, I think it's great that your work speaks for itself. You're an incredible photographer, Kelsey. We're very proud of you and how talented you are."

"Thank you, but Dad? Can we just keep this between us for now? Please don't tell Mom. She'll hear 'New York' and freak out. I need to think this through without having her in my ear, panicking about me moving so far away."

Her Dad stood up and walked around the counter. He wrapped his arm around Kelsey's shoulder and kissed the top of her head.

"Of course. I won't say a word. I'll let you tell her when you're ready."

"Thanks."

"What about Nathan? Did you tell him?" 

Kelsey frowned up at her Dad. 

"No, why would I have?"

"I don't know. The two of you are just so close, I figured maybe you told him already."

Kelsey shook her head.

"Well, I'll be honest, Kelsey. I'm not sure if Nathan could handle it again," he said with a gentle laugh. He pulled the knife and cutting board away from Kelsey and started chopping for her. 

"Not sure that he could handle what?"

"Having you leave again. He looked like a lost puppy when you were away at college. He asked about you almost every single day."

Kelsey couldn't help but smile to herself. It was nice to know that he missed her, maybe as much as she had missed him. 

"Yeah, well, we'd been together almost every single day of our lives leading up to college. It was strange not having him with me. I mean, we talked on the phone a lot, and I was home quite a bit, but it wasn't the same."

Her Dad nodded as he pushed some carrots off the board and into a large bowl.

"How do you think he'd feel if you told him you were moving?"

"I don't know. Sad? Disappointed? The same way I'd feel about leaving him and everyone else behind."

"Just remember to base your decisions off of rational thoughts, not emotions, ok?" Their heads turned as they heard Kelsey's Mom return home from work and pull into the garage. "Which is exactly why we aren't going to tell your Mom. Her emotions would take over and she'd never let you leave." 

They both laughed as Kelsey's Mom walked in the kitchen from the garage. 

"Hey guys! What's so funny?" She smiled and set her purse down on the table. 

"Nothing, honey. Kelsey and I were just talking about the family pictures that she's taking on Wednesday."

"Oh, have you figured out what you're wearing yet, Kels? I was thinking about wearing that navy blue shirt, you know...the one with the buttons down the side? I'm not sure about your Dad, though. Have you picked out an outfit?" Kelsey's Mom rambled to herself. 

They had successfully distracted her Mom. She made brief eye contact with her Dad. He winked, silently sealing his promise that he wouldn't say anything to her Mom about New York. 

Kelsey smiled and started to set the table. 

>>>>><<<<<

Kelsey sat in her car in the parking lot of Kinley Park. She watched the runners and the cyclists as they hurried down the various paths. She watched as parents chased their children and as kids blew bubbles into the wind. She smiled to herself as she people watched and waited for Nathan to arrive after work. 

Several minutes later, Nathan's black truck pulled into the vacant spot next to hers. She shut her car off and grabbed her camera. 

"Hey...thanks for coming," she smiled at Nathan as he stepped out of his truck and closed the door. He was still in his work clothes. She couldn't help but admire the muscles that rippled beneath his tight black t-shirt and snug jeans. 

"Sorry, I came straight from work," he gestured to himself. "I'm kind of dirty." 

"No problem. I wanted to go to some less obvious places around the park, anyway. Everyone takes pictures by the fountains and I was hoping to get something a little more original."

"Got it. Where are you wanting to go?" 

"I think there is an old bridge near the back. Let's start over there."

Kelsey and Nathan walked through the park, dodging the runners and loose dogs. Nathan kicked a runaway soccer ball back to some waiting children. They were in awe of his skills. One kid kicked it back to Nathan. He laughed and bounced the ball back and forth between his knees, off his head, across his feet...doing everything he could to impress the little kids. Kelsey smiled at his playfulness. She stepped back and took a couple pictures of Nathan without him realizing it. He kicked the ball back to the cheering kids and waved as they started to walk away. 

"Oh my God, that was the cutest thing ever," she said as she nudged him. 

Nathan laughed and shook his head modestly. 

Kelsey pointed towards the small creek where she knew the bridge was. 

"I think it's back here."

They followed a small dirt path and found the old bridge. It was in pretty sad condition, due to years of neglect, but Kelsey knew that there was beauty in it. She handed her camera bag to Nathan. 

"Could you hold this? I want to see if this light would work. I thought I could get some pictures of our parents on this. That is, if it doesn't break," she laughed. Nathan walked to the bridge and stepped onto it. He bounced and jumped on the aging boards, testing their strength. He nodded. 

"It's old, but it should be alright for a couple people at a time, I think."

Kelsey crouched down and took pictures from several different angles. She adjusted the shutter speed on her camera and took a few more random snapshots, trying to decide on the best settings for that area. Nathan watched her, fascinated with her talent. Kelsey flipped through the pictures on the screen of her camera. Once she found the settings that she liked, she made a note of it and turned to Nathan. 

"Ok! There were a couple more places I wanted to see, if that's alright?" 

Nathan grinned and motioned for her to lead the way. 

"There's a clearing, but it's a bit of a walk from here. It's like a little field that I thought might make for a cool background. Grass, wildflowers...pretty scenery," she explained as they walked down the hiker's path near the back of the park. 

"What made you decide on photography, Kels? Besides your obvious talent for it?" 

Kelsey shrugged as they walked. "I'm not sure. I just really enjoy finding beauty in things. Capturing a moment...freezing it in time forever. It just amazes me. That, and it's the kind of career that I feel like I can always improve on. I don't think I'll ever get bored." 

"Well, you're awesome. You're going to be really successful," he replied. 

Kelsey felt her face blush with embarrassment, but the feelings were quickly replaced with a growing pit in her stomach. She still hadn't told Nathan about her potential internship in New York. 

Before she could work up the nerve to mention it to him, they arrived at their destination, a small, very secluded field at the far edge of the park. It was away from the walking paths and far away from the noise. The grass was tall in most places and a long row of trees provided a beautiful backdrop. Kelsey started walking though the tall grass, looking for different places that would work for the photos that she had in mind. She started playing with her camera, snapping pictures and messing with the settings. She made notes of what looked best, then turned to ask Nathan what he thought. 

When she turned around was sitting on the ground, leaning back on his hands, watching her with a smile on his face. 

She grinned. "What?"

Nathan shook his head. "Nothing. I just like to watch you."

"Why's that?" she asked. She snapped a quick picture of Nathan. He rolled his eyes and held his hand up bashfully in front of his face. 

"Because it's obvious that you love doing this."

"I do," she said, snapping another photo.

"Enough pictures. Come here," he laughed. 

Kelsey walked over to him and sat between his legs. She leaned her back against his chest and held the camera out at arms length. Nathan wrapped an arm around her, hugging her possessively as Kelsey clicked the shutter. She leaned back and kissed his temple and took another. He moved his mouth down and kissed her. Kelsey snapped another picture. 

"Enough," he mumbled against her mouth. Kelsey grinned, their lips still pressed together as she took one last photograph. 

She pulled away from him and set her camera down. She turned her body and crawled over him, straddling his lap. As her hands found the side of his face, he laid back into the willowy grass. They were buried in the tall weeds, completely unseen in case anyone may have decided to wander in that area. 

Nathan ran his hands up Kelsey's arms, then grasped her face. He pulled her lips away from his. 

"I need to tell you something, Kelsey."

"Ok?"

Nathan took a deep breath and exhaled. She saw his jaw clench and he closed his eyes. He was noticeably nervous. 

"Nate, what's wrong? You can tell me anything."

Nathan nodded and opened his eyes.

"I know. I just need you to believe what I'm about to tell you, alright?"

"Ok...you're making me nervous."

"I love you, Kelsey."

Kelsey took a deep breath and dropped her head against Nathan's chest. She knew that he wasn't talking about the kind of love that they shared as friends for so many years. She rested against him for a second before sitting up. 

"I love you, too."

Nathan smiled and sat up. He smoothed her long hair off of her shoulders and wrapped his hands around her neck. He pulled her into him and kissed her with such passion and such tenderness that it left her completely breathless. 

Kelsey rested her arms on his shoulders as they kissed in the warm, quiet field. An occasional bird chirping or the sound of a late afternoon cricket would fill the air, but other than that, nothing but the sounds of their wet lips and soft sighs were to be heard. 

"I didn't tell you that for any reason, other than because I just couldn't hold it in anymore," he said between kisses.

"I don't care why you said it, I'm just happy that you did."

"So, you aren't freaked out?"

"Why would that freak me out?" Kelsey laughed.

"Because, we've only been, you know...like this...for a few days."

"But we've known each other for 23 years," she replied. 

Nathan nodded, twirling the ends of Kelsey's hair between his fingers. 

"I'm pretty sure that I've loved you the entire time, Kels."

"Same here."

Nathan grabbed her by the waist and rolled her onto her back, laying his heavy body across hers. His hands explored her, pushing her shirt up and running his fingers lazily around her belly button. They kissed occasionally, but mostly just enjoyed the sight and the feel of one another. 

Nathan's lips went from her neck to her bare midriff. He kissed her, then let his tongue drag along her skin. 

Kelsey stared up at the pale blue sky. The grass and wildflowers blew and bent in the gentle wind. She glanced down and watched Nathan's dark blonde head gliding across her body, devouring her, gently nibbling his way from hip to hip. The soft stubble on his face scratched against her skin. She ran her fingers along the back of his neck and smiled. It was perfect. Her heart, her mind and her body were all finally in agreement. This was it.

"Let's make love, Nathan," she whispered.

Nathan's lips froze on her left hip. He lifted his head. 

"Now? Kelsey, I don't want you to do this unless you're ready. Don't do this just because I told you that I loved you, ok?"

"Can you think of a better reason? You love me. I love you. I trust you completely. I'm ready...not just because of what we said, but because it's right. I want this and I know you do, too. Please. Please," Kelsey pleaded. She could feel the need and desire boiling up within her. "God, Nathan. Please. We're all alone. Tell me that this doesn't feel right."

Nathan listened to her beg and groaned with desire for her. He positioned himself between her legs. Kelsey sat up and glanced back over her shoulder. They were far enough away from the park and deep enough into the abandoned field that she knew no one could possibly see or hear them. She turned back to Nathan and pulled her shirt over her head. She reached for the hem of his work shirt and pulled it up, revealing his body. He took it off completely, then laid it underneath Kelsey's back for comfort.

His hands crawled up her spine, then unhooked the clasp on her bra. He traced his fingers under the straps and guided them down her shoulders. The cups fell away from her breasts. Her responsive flesh perked up as a warm breeze crossed the field. Nathan pushed her back onto the ground. He leaned over her on his forearms, letting his mouth and lips travel over her. He licked and nipped at her breasts. He sucked her nipples deep into his mouth, moaning against them and sending small vibrations through her nerves. Her hips started to press upward towards him instinctively. He was doing everything right, warming her body in a way that even the summer afternoon sun couldn't. She felt her pussy start to clench as he continued to devour her breasts.

"Ohhhh. Please. I want you inside of me," she groaned. 

Kelsey arched her back, pushing her stomach up towards the sky. Nathan lowered his mouth and kissed a path from between her breasts down to the button of her shorts. He unfastened them and started to pull them down. Kelsey lifted her hips, allowing her shorts to slip down past her round buttocks and down her tanned thighs. Once he had her shorts around her knees, Kelsey pulled her legs out of them. Nathan discarded them with the rest of their clothes and leaned back up to kiss her. 

"Fuck, I can't believe that I finally get to do this with you. You're so beautiful. God," he shook his head, "I hope you know how beautiful you are."

Kelsey closed her eyes and rolled her head to the side as Nathan kissed her neck. He bit into her softly. 

"Ahhh! Oh, please. I can't wait anymore!"

"Just relax. I want to enjoy this. I want us to remember every single thing about this. We will never get this moment back, so lets make the most of it," he whispered. 

Kelsey just moaned and wrapped her hands around Nathan's muscular back. She ran her fingernails up and down the length, letting them come to rest on his lower back. She pulled his hips down into hers. Nathan laughed. 

"You're not going to let me go slow, are you?" 

She smiled and shook her head. "I don't care how fast or slow you go. I just want to feel you inside of me. Now. Please."

Nathan lifted himself up between Kelsey's shaking knees. He hooked his fingers into her panties and pulled them down her legs, revealing her glistening pussy. Nathan bent down and kissed her directly on top of her clit. 

"Ohhh! Mmmm!" Kelsey moaned and writhed on the ground beneath him.

She watched as he sat back and opened his belt. Just the metallic sound of his belt being unfastened was enough to make her start to pant. She knew what was in store for her. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. She reached down and started to massage herself as Nathan pushed his tight work jeans and briefs down to his knees. His cock bounced free and stood out proudly from his body. Kelsey's hands immediately abandoned her own body and latched onto his dick. She squeezed it, feeling the velvety skin against her palms. Kelsey leaned forward. Nathan stayed on his knees in front of her. 

"Is it ok if I suck on you for a minute?" Kelsey panted, lowering her head and letting her lips just barely brushing against the head of his cock. 

Nathan groaned and nodded as she looked up at him with her big, brown eyes. Kelsey opened her mouth and stared at him as she wrapped her lips around the head. She held him in place and just let the taste of him flood her mouth. She sucked, forcing pressure around the most sensitive part of his erection. 

Nathan let out a long hiss of pleasure.

"Ohhh, fuck, Kelsey. I love looking at your mouth on me like this," he groaned. 

She moaned around his dick, pushing it in a few more inches. She braced her hands on the front of his thighs as she worked the first half of him in and out of her mouth. A thick stream of spit leaked out of the side of her mouth and dropped onto her left breast. Nathan noticed and wiped it off with two of his fingers. He pulled his cock out of her mouth and shoved his saliva soaked fingers in. 




Meant To Be Ch. 03



"Here, you dropped this," he said with a playful grin. Kelsey smiled around them and closed her eyes. He pumped his fingers in and out of her mouth erotically, then quickly replaced them with his aching dick. He groaned as Kelsey swallowed his length, her lips brushing against his pelvis. 

She wrapped her hands around the base of his cock. She slowly pulled her mouth off, providing him with a perfect amount of pressure and suction. Her mouth popped off of his dick and her hands started to stroke him. He reached down and lifted her face up so they could look at each other. 

Neither of them spoke. There were no words for what they were feeling. They both knew that this was exactly where they were meant to be.

Kelsey fell back to the ground. She pulled on his arms and he dropped himself down towards her. He balanced on his arms and knees, his feet still trapped in his heavy work boots and jeans. Neither of them cared or even seemed to notice. He weaved his fingers into her long hair, gripping it as he kissed her swollen mouth. As he dropped his body down, she felt his erection brush against her slick pussy. 

They both groaned at the sensation. 

"Oh, Kelsey. Oh my God," he said with a sharp inhale.

"Ahhh! Just...just bury yourself inside of me," she panted. 

Nathan dropped his right hand down and grabbed his erection. He pulled his face back and stared down at Kelsey as he lined the head up at her warm, dripping entrance. 

"I love you."

Kelsey smiled. 

"I lov---"

Nathan didn't even wait for her to finish the sentence before thrusting his entire length into her. 

They both moaned in unison once Nathan's balls pressed against her. Neither of them moved. They just panted and stared at each other. Kelsey started to shake. 

"Ohhh fuck! You're so tight. Are you ok?" 

"Oh God, yes. Nathan...I can't believe you're finally inside of me. Oh my God!" 

Nathan groaned and dropped his forehead down to hers. He started to pull out slowly, inching his cock back out of Kelsey's warm, smooth cunt. After having been filled so perfectly, she moaned at the sudden feeling of emptiness.

Nathan pushed himself back in and Kelsey's lower back arched off the ground. Nathan kissed her between her breasts and groaned as he gradually found a rhythm that they both seemed to enjoy. 

Kelsey fought to keep her eyes open, but he was thrusting himself into her at a perfect, steady pace. His pelvis was rubbing against hers at just the right angle, stimulating her clit each time they made contact. Her eyes fluttered closed as her breathing deepened. 

"Oh Nate...fuck, you're so good. Ohhh God, you're good," she moaned. Her hands came up to his neck and she pulled his mouth down to hers. "Kiss me," she whispered. 

Nathan groaned and brushed his lips against hers softly. 

"You're so beautiful, Kelsey," he whispered between kisses. She dug her teeth into his lip, then released him. 

"I want to ride you."

Nathan rolled onto the grass. Kelsey felt his dick slip out of her pussy as she positioned herself on top of him. She placed her knees on either side of his body and reached down between her legs to find his cock. She grabbed it by the shaft and groaned as she sank down onto him. 

She sat up so he could have an unobstructed view of her body as she glided up and down his stiff erection. She started out slow, rising and falling just a few inches at a time, enjoying the stretch and the full feeling of his cock deep inside. Her hands glided up and down her thighs. Her head fell back, raising her face and her naked breasts towards the sun. 

After several minutes of slow, sensuous riding, Kelsey needed more. She could feel the blood rushing to her pussy, letting her know that an orgasm wouldn't be far away, so she grabbed one of Nathan's hands and guided it to her clit. His thumb immediately found it's target.

Kelsey's eyes sprang open and she started riding him faster. 

"Oh yeah...ohhhh yeah. Oh Nathan!" she gasped. 

She leaned forward and braced her hands against his hard chest. Nathan's hands came around and grabbed her ass. He pushed and pulled, making her bounce on his cock as hard and fast as her hips would allow. Nathan's head lifted and he latched his mouth onto one of her bouncing breasts. He moaned around it. 

"Fuck, Kelsey! I'm close...fuck! I'm fucking close," he growled around her stiff nipple. 

Just hearing Nathan tell her that she was about to ride him to an orgasm for the first time was enough to push Kelsey over the edge. She wrapped her arms around his neck and rode him until her orgasm rendered her completely motionless. She sat, impaled on his throbbing cock, feeling her climax tear through her body, making her pussy clench tightly around him. Nathan pulled his mouth off her breast.

"Ohhh, yeah. I can feel you -oh fuck- I can feel you squeezing my cock, Kelsey!"

"Ahhh! Come with me! Come with me...come on...come on...oh fuck!" she panted into his ear. 

Nathan groaned and grabbed her ass, cramming the very last inch of his dick into her pulsing, wet slit.

"Oh fuuuuck," Nathan growled as his cum exploded from his cock, spurting one long, hot jet of cum after another into her. His entire body jerked underneath her. Kelsey moaned as her insides were coated with Nathan's hot cum. She collapsed on top of him. 

It took Nathan's cock several minutes to stop pulsing and jerking inside of her, but eventually, she could feel him start to soften. She carefully lifted herself off of him and fell down beside him, nuzzling into his side. His fingers lazily glided up and down her back as they tried to regulate their breathing. 

Kelsey sighed and kissed his chest. She leaned up on her elbow and looked down at Nathan, who was smiling up at her.

"Wow," she laughed.

"Wow." Nathan nodded. 

"Nate, that was..." Kelsey shrugged at her lack of available speech.

"Fucking incredible? Mind blowing? Worth waiting a lifetime for?" he suggested with a grin. 

Kelsey nodded. "All of the above. You're amazing."

"You're amazing." He pulled her back down to his side and kissed her forehead. "I really do love you, Kels." 

She smiled against his chest. "I'll never get tired of hearing that. I love you, too." 

They lay hidden in the tall grass for the longest time, just kissing and touching each other. They talked about everything. They went from laughing to serious and back again. An hour felt like mere minutes when she was in his arms. Their fingers and legs intertwined. 

"So, we get to take family pictures here tomorrow, huh?" Nathan laughed, lifting his head to look around.

Kelsey giggled. "Yeah. That should be fun, trying to keep a straight face." 

She sat up and slipped her bra on, motioning for Nathan to hook it behind her back. He did, then kissed the clasp and reached down to pull his pants up. They dressed quickly, and after making sure they had all their belongings, they started walking back through the grassy field, starting the short walk back to the park. 

The sun was beginning to set and the park was nearly empty as they made it back to the trail that lead to their cars. 

"So, when does your internship at Studio 16 start?" Nathan asked. 

Kelsey's heart dropped. She knew that she needed to tell Nathan about her job offer. She swallowed.

"Well, actually, I--" 

Nathan's phone interrupted her. He held up a finger and fished his phone out of his pocket. Kelsey groaned inwardly. She knew that she'd have to find a better time to talk to him about something so important. It wasn't really a conversation that could be rushed.

'Sorry. It's Dad. Just a sec," Nathan answered his phone as they continued walking. Just as he was hanging up, they had reached their cars. 

"Sorry. He needs me to come over before I go home," he said, unlocking his truck. Kelsey pressed the button on her fob, unlocking her doors as well. Nathan opened her door for her and put her camera on the seat. He dropped his mouth down and kissed her. His hand wrapped around her waist, squeezing it gently. 

"I'm never going to forget today, Kelsey."

She shook her head. "Me either." 

Nathan pulled back a couple inches as a look of concern spread across his face. 

"You alright?"

Kelsey smiled and placed a hand on his chest. "I'm fine. Just...happy." 

Nathan laughed softly. "Me too, Kels." 

They kissed one last time before Kelsey climbed into her car. Nathan closed the door for her, then with a wink and a smile, got into his own truck. They drove off, Nathan to his parent's house, Kelsey to hers. She drove behind his truck, trying to think of the best way to talk to him about the possibility of New York. 

Kelsey knew that after she took pictures the next day, everyone was headed to a nearby town for a nice dinner. She decided that she and Nathan could ride together and discuss her situation on the way home.

She sighed as she pulled up to her house. As she got out of her car, she glanced over at Nathan, who was getting out of his truck at the Lowe's. 

He mouthed a simple 'Love you' before walking inside. 

Kelsey felt her heart swell. 

How could she ever leave?

>>>><<<<

"Alright. Nancy, I need you a little to your left. Cameron...stop moving. Dave, you should be over a little to your left, too. Cameron! Stop squirming! Nate, next to Cam," Kelsey directed. 

Everyone was laughing and having a good time as Kelsey helped the Lowe's pose and position themselves for family photos. She had already taken her family's photos with the help of a tripod and the automatic timer, getting herself in a few pictures with her parents. The early evening sun was perfect and the scenery couldn't have been more beautiful. Kelsey had managed to get all of the pictures that their parents wanted. The entire Lowe family photo was the last of the evening before leaving for dinner. 

"Ok. I'm going to do a few posed pictures, then I want everyone to do your own thing so I can get some candid shots of everyone. Ok, here we go!"

Kelsey started snapping pictures, moving and angling herself, making sure to get plenty of options for them to choose from. She played with her settings, starting with the ones that she knew from yesterday would work best. After taking several posed shots, she took several of Nathan and his brother wrestling around, a few of his parents laughing, some of everyone laughing as Dave told a stupid joke. Kelsey smiled at the screen as she watched picture after picture of this beautiful family come into view. 

"Alright, guys! I'm done! I'll start editing these tonight and get them on discs as soon as possible."

Nancy and Kelsey's Mom came over and gave her a hug, thanking her for taking the pictures. Everyone started heading back towards the cars as Kelsey packed up her camera. Nathan helped her carry the equipment. 

"How do you think they turned out?"

"Really well, I think. These might be the best ones yet. The light was really great tonight."

"Want to ride with me to dinner?"

Kelsey looked up at Nathan and nodded. She swallowed, knowing that she needed to talk to him about her job opportunity, but she still wasn't sure how or when to approach him about it. 

Kelsey and Nathan packed her equipment into the back of her parents car. She jumped into his truck and they followed everyone to a nice Italian restaurant the next town over.

They drove quietly for awhile before Nathan broke the silence. 

"You're still ok about what happened yesterday, right?"

Kelsey nodded. "Of course. I promise, I was ready."

"Alright. I was so scared that you were going to think that I told you I loved you, just so you'd have sex with me."

"I know you better than that."

"That's true." Nathan let his hand slide across the center seat, lacing his fingers between hers. He nodded down at their hands. "I want to pull you across the seat and make you sit next to me, but I think my Dad would see." He laughed, nodding at his parent's car in front of them. Kelsey giggled. 

"I don't think they'd mind." 

"Probably not. I'm pretty sure they're all convinced that we will end up together."

Kelsey laughed quietly, then decided to change the subject. "So, tell me about the new medical building that you guys are working on." 

She stared at Nathan as he started talking about work, and the remodeling they were going to do to the Bradford's house once Kelsey moved out. As hard as she tried to focus, Kelsey's mind started to wander in a million different directions. She thought about New York and Studio 16. She thought about Nathan and what it would be like to leave him again. She thought about having to find her own place, either here or in New York. She was so consumed with worry that she didn't even realize that they had pulled up to the restaurant. 

"Hey...Kelsey!" Nathan said, waving a hand in front of her. She blinked, then looked around. 

"We're here. Did all my talk about work put you to sleep or something?" He laughed. Kelsey laughed nervously, then got out of the truck. They met their families inside. As the hostess lead them to their table, Nathan leaned down to her ear. 

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asked.

Kelsey nodded and forced a smile. "I'm fine." 

The expression on his face told Kelsey that he didn't quite believe her, but they had arrived at their table, so he was forced to drop it. Nathan sat down, opposite from Kelsey. She felt his foot rub against hers. She peaked up over her menu and smiled at him. She felt his other foot work it's way between her ankles. He used his feet to push her legs apart slightly. Her eyes slowly traveled back up to his as they stared at each other. 

"Nate? Kelsey?"

They both jumped to attention as Dave pointed towards the waiter. He was waiting on their orders. They ordered, straightened themselves up, and tried to pay attention to the conversations that were happening between their families. 

As the evening went on, Kelsey couldn't help but think about how much she would miss, not just Nate, but both of their families if she decided to leave. She couldn't imagine not being home for family dinners, birthday parties, or even simple get-togethers like this one. Her eyes wandered from person to person around the table, finally stopping on Nathan. She watched him as he laughed and told a story about something funny Dave had done at work the week before. Everyone laughed and moved on to new conversations, but Kelsey couldn't take her eyes off of Nathan. He took a bite of his meal and looked at Kelsey. She blushed when he caught her staring. 

Nathan pulled his phone out of his pocket. He typed something, then rested it on the table. Kelsey felt her purse buzz. She reached in, thankful that she'd put it on silent, and opened the message. 

Nathan: Maybe we can get a little lost on the way home...

Kelsey smiled and looked up at him. She nodded discreetly. He smiled and put his phone away. 

The rest of the meal went perfectly. Just as everyone was standing up to leave, Kelsey felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and her heart fell into her stomach.

"Kelsey Bradford! What a surprise!"

"Mr. Powell. Wow. Um, Hi." Kelsey stuttered and leaned in to hug her former Professor, the same man that gave her name to David Fisher. She started to panic when her Mom came up to introduce herself. 

"Mr. Powell? I've heard so much about you, I'm Kelsey's Mom." They shook hands.

"Well, it's a pleasure. Kelsey was always one of my best students. You must be very proud."

Kelsey stood and listened awkwardly. She took a deep breath and prayed that Mr. Powell didn't mention New York. 

"So, Kelsey, David Fisher emailed me and said that you haven't returned his call. I was surprised. I figured you would jump at the opportunity."

Kelsey groaned inwardly. She didn't even have the chance to reply.

"David Fisher? Isn't he a pretty famous photographer?" her Mom asked. "How did he hear about you?"

Kelsey opened her mouth but couldn't find the words. She glanced up at Nathan who was listening intently. 

"David and I are close friends from college. We always kept in touch, even after he left for New York and when I started teaching photography. He always comes to me for internship referrals. Kelsey was my top referral this year, naturally," Mr. Powell replied. Kelsey felt every single pair of eyes staring at her. 

"Well, Kelsey. It was great to see you. I do hope you take David up on his offer." Mr. Powell nodded at her family. "Pleasure to meet you all." He smiled politely, then walked away. 

Kelsey closed her eyes. She couldn't believe what had just happened. She turned around slowly to face her parents, the Lowe's and Nathan. Everyone stared at her. 

"New York? Kelsey? When were you going to tell us?"

"Mom, I haven't decided anything yet. You heard Mr. Powell. I haven't even called David Fisher back."

"Kelsey, I-" her Mom started to protest before her Dad interjected. 

"Listen, Kelsey is a grown woman. I'm sure she'll make a perfectly wise, rational decision. We can talk about this when we get home." His eyes wandered to Nathan, then back to Kelsey. Everyone silently gathered their things and started to leave. Kelsey noticed that Nathan was walking several steps behind her. 

Kelsey climbed into Nathan's truck and closed the door. She laid her head on the headrest behind her as Nathan got in and started the engine. He pulled out of the parking lot and they drove silently for several minutes before the tension got the best of her. 

"Look, it's just an offer at this point. I haven't even called the guy back."

"How long have you known about this, Kelsey?" he asked quietly.

"Only since Monday."

"Only since Monday? Only? Kelsey, do you remember everything that has happened since Monday?" 

"Of course."

"So, you found out on Monday. Since then, I've told you that I loved you. You told me that you loved me. We've had sex for the first time...and the whole time you knew that there was a chance that you might leave?"

Kelsey didn't say anything. 

"So, you just let this happen," he pointed back and forth between them. "You just let this thing between us get more and more involved. When were you going to tell me?"

"I wanted to tell you yesterday, but didn't know how. Then everything happened and I just...I just didn't know what to do, so I was going to talk to you about it tonight."

"Before or after we fucked, Kelsey?"

"You don't have to be so mean about this, Nathan. I haven't made any decisions."

"Listen. I was ready to lose you to college, but New York? For how long? Would you even come home? What if you landed some incredible job out there?"

"Nathan, these are the same questions that I've been asking myself for the last 48 hours. I don't know. All I do know is that this is an incredible opportunity that I have to at least consider. David Fisher is an amazing photographer."

David drove in silence. Kelsey scooted closer, but could feel the tension radiating off of him. She slipped her hand onto his leg as they drove quietly for several minutes.

"Say something," she whispered. 

"I don't know what to say, Kels. I'm just sitting here, thinking about what would happen if you left. I just can't believe that you let it go that far yesterday if you knew all along that you might be leaving."

"Do you wish that we wouldn't have had sex? That I hadn't told you that I love you?"

"I don't know. It just complicates things now."

"I just feel torn, Nathan. What would you do if you were me? If you had someone that you loved at home, someone that you could see a real future with, and then the chance of a lifetime came along and was waiting for you in New York? Seriously, Nathan...what the hell would you do?" Kelsey could feel her frustration consuming her. 

Nathan didn't even look at Kelsey as they drove back through their small town. 




Meant To Be Ch. 03



"You're being really selfish," she said sharply.

"Sorry that I'm not fucking thrilled with the idea of you leaving, Kelsey."

"Don't be a smart ass. I don't expect you to be happy about it, but you don't have to make this any harder for me, either."

Nathan pulled up to the Lowe's house and shut off his truck. Kelsey looked around. It looked as though their families had beat them home from the restaurant. He leaned forward and put his head on the steering wheel.

"So, where are you now, Kelsey? What do you think you should do? Because if you're thinking that New York is the best decision, then I need to walk away."

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"I'm not kidding. I was a fucking mess while you were at college. Yeah, I saw you from time to time, but I was with Amy and I was miserable. These last few days with you, have been the best that I can ever remember. Everything has just felt so...right. Like this is all...meant to be. Now, you're telling me that you might leave? I just don't want to get hurt, Kelsey. Alright?"

"I...I-" Kelsey stuttered, not believing what he was saying. "What about long distance?" Kelsey looked at him hopefully.

"Long distance, but for how long? Who is to say that you won't be there for good? Then what? I'm not leaving here, Kelsey. I want to take over Dad's company someday. You know that." 

Kelsey sighed. "I don't know what to say, Nathan."

"So, you want to go?"

"I just don't know." 

"I'm going home, Kelsey."

She looked at him. His eyes were tired. She could see the sadness behind them and it made her sick. 

"Nathan. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. I didn't know how."

He nodded slowly and started his truck. 

"Please. Just talk to me."

"I don't know what to say, Kels."

"Tell me that you love me."

Nathan sighed. "I do love you. But it's just going to make things worse if we keep saying that and then you decide to leave. Maybe we should just back off until you make a decision."

Kelsey swallowed and picked up her purse. She could feel tears pooling in her eyes. She leaned over and kissed him softly on the cheek before getting out and shutting the door behind her. She started to walk to her parents house, listening to Nathan back out of the Lowe's driveway and pull away. By the time she made it to the front door, she had hot tears streaming down her face. She went inside and went straight to her bedroom. 

Her Dad had laid all of her camera equipment on her bed. She dropped her things by the door and collapsed next to it. She ran her hands over the cases. She tried thinking about what to do, but she simply couldn't focus. She needed to distract herself, so she grabbed her camera and decided to start editing the photos that she took of their families. 

Kelsey started up her computer, and put her memory card in the slot. The photos started to load and Kelsey began looking through them one by one. 

She couldn't help but smile as she scrolled through each photo. 

The pictures of their parents were fantastic. Both the Bradford's and the Lowe's looked so happy and in love. Kelsey laughed as she scrolled through the photos of Nathan and his brothers. 

Kelsey clicked and scrolled, then caught a glimpse of a picture that she didn't recognize from that evening. She enlarged it and the photo immediately brought tears to her eyes. 

It was a picture from the day before. She was leaning back against Nathan and he was kissing her temple. His eyes were closed and she was smiling. They both looked relaxed. They both looked happy. It was obvious that they were in love. 

Something inside Kelsey snapped. She had to see Nathan. 

She grabbed her keys and her purse and ran outside to her car. She dialed Nathan as she pulled out of the driveway and headed for his house.

"Hello?"

"Nathan, I'm coming over."

"Kelsey, I told you-"

"I don't care what you said. I need to see you."

"All the guys are here."

"I don't give a shit. I'm coming over. Now."

Kelsey hung up and drove the short distance to Nathan's apartment. She let herself in without knocking and walked straight to his bedroom, closing and locking the door behind her.

Nathan was laying on his bed. He sat up when she entered the room. 

"Nathan. I need you to listen to me, ok?" She held up her hands. "Don't talk. Just listen. I don't know what I'm going to do about New York. Maybe I shouldn't have told you that I loved you, and I probably shouldn't have had sex with you, but I'm not sorry that I did. I do love you. The idea of spending any amount of time away from you hurts. I just can't write off this opportunity without at least considering it. I need you to understand that. I need you to respect that. Please, Nathan. Don't make this decision any harder for me, ok? Please?" 

Kelsey walked towards Nathan's bed and sank to her knees between his legs. She grabbed his face. 

"Nathan, whatever happens, it is not going to change the fact that I love you."

He nodded. "I know. I'm sorry. Fuck, I'm sorry. I've been a dick."

"Don't apologize. I should have told you sooner. This is my fault."

Nathan leaned down and kissed her swollen lips. 

Kelsey closed her eyes and let her lips melt against his. She stayed on her knees below him until she felt his hands grab her waist and lift her onto his lap. She kicked her shoes off, then wrapped her long legs around him and kissed him like their love depended on it. 

His large hands cupped her face, his thumbs brushing against her cheeks as they kissed. Kelsey pulled away from him. Her eyes were heavy with lust.

"Fuck me, Nate."

"I don't want to make things more difficult, Kels."

Kelsey shook her head. "I don't care about that. All I care about is you and me. Right now. Right here. Please just fuck me." 

Nathan didn't need anymore convincing. He laid back and pulled her down on top of him, crushing her body down against his. She laid on top of him, feeling his erection grow against her stomach. Their lips found each other once again as Nathan started to pull her shirt up over her head. Kelsey sat up and straddled his body. She pulled her shirt off and threw it on the floor. She unclasped her bra. Nathan's fingers reached up and pulled it off, revealing her creamy breasts. She watched as he drank in the sight of her. His fingers traced circles around her stiff nipples, eliciting a long moan from her lips. Nathan sat up and wrapped his lips around the end of her right breast. She felt his tongue flick against her hardened nipple, then jerked as his teeth sank into it firmly. Her hands gripped the back of his head, pushing him into her cleavage, begging him for more.

"Ahhh, don't stop. Please!"

Nathan's mouth traveled back and forth between her heavy tits, licking and sucking every inch of skin he could. Her hips were grinding into his crotch, humping against him as he teased her sensitive nipples with his lips. She felt his fingers pop the button on her pants. She smiled and stood up next to the bed. 

Her hands slid into her pants, pushing them down her legs and letting her damp panties follow. She stood in front of him naked and shivering with need. She grabbed his hands and pulled him off the bed. One by one, she unfastened the buttons on his dress shirt and slid it off his arms. She kissed his chest as she worked his pants and boxer briefs off. He stepped out of them and kicked them to the side. Kelsey stepped back and admired his thick erection. She let her palm slide along the underside of his cock, watching as it bounced and throbbed against her hand. When she wrapped her small fist around it, his hips jerked and a deep moan escaped his lips. 

"Fuck. Oh fuck, Kelsey."

She worked her hand up and down his rigid shaft, watching as his body reacted to the sensations. She watched a thick bead of cum form at the head of his cock. She rubbed her thumb against it, spreading the wetness around. She lifted her thumb to her mouth and sucked on it while Nathan stared at her with a lust that she'd never seen before. She squeezed her thighs and knew that she was more than ready. 

Without a word, Kelsey bent over the side of Nathan's bed. She raised her round ass high in the air and looked back over her shoulder at him.

"Please come fuck me."

Nathan groaned as he positioned himself behind her. She felt his hands squeeze and knead her flesh possessively. His cock bounced behind her, unintentionally dragging itself against her wet slit. They both moaned. 

"Shhh. All the guys know you're in here."

"I don't care anymore," she whimpered. She reached between her legs and found Nathan's cock. She pumped on it a few times before lining him up with her pussy. She sank back onto him slowly. Her head fell forward and they both groaned in unison. 

"Fuck!"

"Oh fuck, Kelsey," he growled as he pushed his entire length into her. She felt his balls press against her. Neither of them moved. They just enjoyed the moment of pure sexual satisfaction.

"God, you're so big. You feel so fucking big, Nathan!"

Nathan's breathing became heavier as he started to inch himself out from between Kelsey's tight pussy. Her fingers clawed at his bed sheets and her eyes pinched shut as she waited on him to push back into her. All that remained inside of her was his thick, throbbing cock head, but he didn't move. He didn't rush to fuck her. He just held still.

Kelsey whimpered and tried to push back on him, but Nathan grabbed her hips and kept her motionless. She groaned.

"Please! Please just fuck me. What's wrong? Fuck me Nathan!"

"Tell me that you love me."

"Oh God, I do! I love you."

"Tell me that we'll work this out somehow."

"Of course! Oh God, Nathan...yes. I want to be with you. We'll figure this out!"

Nathan reached down and lifted Kelsey's torso off the bed. He turned her head and kissed her deeply, then pushed his entire length into her forcefully. They moaned into each others mouths. 

One of Nathan's hands wrapped around her waist and the other around her neck as he pushed into her over and over again. The room was filled with a chorus of hushed groaning and breathless panting. Her body jerked as his hand abandoned her waist and came in contact with her engorged clit. He massaged her until her pussy started to clench around him. She worked her way out of his grip around her neck and pushed her face into the mattress. She let the bed absorb her cries as Nathan pounded her pussy from behind. He pulled an orgasm from her, then pushed her straight into a second without giving her a single moment of rest. She could feel him swelling inside of her, pushing her to the edge, emotionally and physically. She gasped as he jerked his dick out of her, then rolled her onto her back. 

He climbed on top of her and started sucking on her swollen nipples. 

"Please don't stop fucking me," she begged helplessly. Her hips jerked up beneath him, searching for his dick. 

"I need a second, Kels. I'm about to cum already." 

"I don't care! I want you to cum!"

Nathan laughed around her nipple. He was trying desperately to take his time and to make it last, but Kelsey wasn't having it. She reached her hand down between their sweaty bodies and found his cock. He groaned into her neck as she rubbed the head against her warm, sticky slit. 

"Don't worry about making it last. I just want to feel you cum inside of me," she whispered into his ear. "Mmmm...just shove yourself into me and cum."

His hunger for Kelsey consumed him and he did exactly that. He pushed his length into her with one forceful thrust. Kelsey's head fell back against the bed and her mouth opened, but she was unable to breathe. Once Nathan was in her, nothing was going to stop him. He fucked Kelsey with a strength he didn't know he had. He closed his eyes as they panted and groaned, trying to fuck away their fears and anxiety. Nathan grabbed her hair and pulled her down onto him with every thrust. Kelsey's body stiffened as a third and final orgasm started to build within her.

"Nat-Nathan...I'm going to cum again. Please cum with me...fuck! Please...cum...with...meeee!" 

Nathan tensed his body and crammed the last pulsing inch of his dick into her. He felt his cum shoot through his shaft, into her quivering pussy.

Kelsey tried to suck in deep gulps of air, but just found herself gasping for precious air beneath him. Her fingernails were dug into his sweaty back. She moaned as his heavy weight collapsed on top of her. 

They were silent for, what felt like, an eternity. Nathan slipped out of her and fell onto the bed beside her. He nuzzled his face into her neck.

"Fuck. We have to make this work, Kelsey. Somehow. We have to make this work."

Kelsey closed her eyes and felt another fresh set of tears pool behind her eyelids. 

"We will," she panted. "We'll figure this out, Nathan. I promise."



Meant To Be Ch. 03



I woke up to Nick kissing the back of my neck and stretched languorously.

"Morning, pet," he murmured.

I turned in his arms, snuggling into his chest, feeling euphoric. His hands roamed my back, stopping to tangle in my hair. He tugged gently, tilting my head back for a kiss. His mouth and hands became more insistent and I arched into him. He cupped my behind, pressing me into him before lifting my leg and hooking it over his hip. I felt the evidence of his arousal between my thighs and rocked along its length, whimpering.

Propping himself up on an elbow, he settled himself between my legs and guided himself into me. I slipped my arms around his neck, staring up into his eyes. His arm circled my back, his hand cradling my face. His movements were shallow but the intimacy of our position made me respond immediately.

"Sometimes missionary is a good favorite, don't you think?" he whispered, stroking my cheek with his thumb.

I smiled slowly, nodding. My fingers ran through his hair and cupped his cheek. He kissed me again, his tongue a gentle caress. We kissed for what could have been hours, alternating from frantic swirlings of our tongues to tender brushes of our lips. He pulsed inside me and I felt myself fluttering around him in response. His eyes were bright, his breath coming faster. The tension in my belly quickly burst open and I cried out against his lips. He locked his arms around me, his hips moving rapidly for several thrusts before I was rewarding with his shout of release.

He rolled to his back, bringing me with him. We dozed for another hour or so, then made our way to the shower. Nick did indeed make me breakfast - a very good one - and we headed out to wander the neighborhood for a while. It was a grey, chilly day, and I was feeling lazy. We stopped for lunch and then at a bookstore but after browsing a bit, it didn't take much to convince Nick to go back home, stopping on the way to get groceries for dinner later.

I changed into a long-sleeved tee and comfortable yoga pants and returned to the living room. Nick was at his drafting table, his pencil moving rapidly. He stacked the papers neatly and got up when he saw me. He was wearing nothing but boxers. I stopped short, my eyes wide. He smirked as he sat on the couch and held his arms out to me, circling them around my waist once I was in front of him.

"I thought we could watch a movie," he told me. "But you are overdressed," he added sternly, slipping his hands under my shirt. 

I giggled breathlessly and stopped him by dropping to the couch next to him. He leaned over me, his hands still tickling my bare skin under my top. He edged the shirt up and kissed my stomach, running his tongue around my belly button.

"Nick," I gasped, my body tensing.

He rested his chin on my stomach and looked at me.

"What's the matter?"

I bit my lip. "I can't just - hang out - naked," I protested, not meeting his eyes.

As comfortable as I had gotten with Nick, I still experienced a moment of bashfulness when he removed my clothes. Undressing for him last night hadn't been exactly difficult, but without all the beer at dinner and his penetrating stare thrilling me as he ordered me to do so, it would have been terrifying. I knew he was aware of this; he had taken to thoughtfully leaving a shirt or robe by his bed for me so I no longer had to ask for one if I needed to get up to go to the bathroom or the kitchen for a drink. The idea of being even partially undressed in the middle of the day in his living room to just watch TV filled me with dread.

"And why not?" He looked amused, his eyes dancing. "It's nothing I haven't seen, love."

"That's - different," I whispered.

He raised his head, his expression becoming serious.

"Darling. You have a beautiful body," he said tenderly, touching my cheek. He sighed sadly. "I wish I could make you see what I see," he added regretfully.

I finally met his eyes directly, wishing I could believe him. He stared at me for a long time, stroking my face. His jaw settled as if he'd come to some sort of decision. Getting up slightly, he gave me a soft kiss.

"Wait here," he told me.

I fell onto my back on the couch and pressed my fingers against my eyelids. I felt a little guilty about killing the mood, but mostly dumbfounded that he found me beautiful and at the expectation that we would hang out mostly naked. Nick soon returned and I saw he was holding a pair of hipster panties and a tank top he must have found in my bag. I wrinkled my forehead inquisitively. He held out a hand.

"Come with me. Please," he implored.

He looked solemn, which added to my confusion. But I placed my hand in his and let him lead me to his bathroom where the large mirror over the sinks allowed for almost a full-length view of our bodies. He stood in front of me, blocking my view of the mirror. Cupping my face, he kissed me deeply. I felt his hands on the hem of my shirt and tensed momentarily before consciously relaxing my body. I let him pull it over my head and remove my bra. I pressed my lips together when his hands began pushing my pants down my hips, shutting my eyes to avoid catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror.

I could sense his face near mine and opened my eyes to see him watching me with a look that was comforting and sympathetic. I gave him a small smile, appreciating that he recognized my discomfort. I know I could have stopped him at any time and he would have done so, but for whatever reason I didn't want to. He gave me another kiss, tugging at one of my curls.

"I want to show you something," he said softly.

I nodded and he turned to face the mirror, standing next to me and putting an arm around me. I pointedly looked anywhere but our reflection.

"Cassandra," he said quietly and I met his eyes in the mirror. "Look at yourself," he continued in an awed voice.

He moved to stand behind me, resting his hands lightly on my shoulders. I kept my eyes locked on his.

"Look," he urged, his hands cupping my breasts. "Now, as I'm a man you'll just have to forgive me for starting with the obvious," he said, making me laugh. "But these breasts are marvelous - so round and full, see how they stand so high?"

He made an approving sound in the back of his throat and a rush of heat swept over me. He ran his hands down my torso.

"This flat stomach...look at how your waist comes in right here in this delicious curve..."

His voice was almost reverent. My eyes unwittingly following his hands.

"And then flares out in these hips," he continued, his hands stroking me. "You have the quintessential womanly figure, pet...all softness and curves..." His words trailed off in a soft moan.

My breathing quickened. I was transfixed by his words, by his voice, by his hands. He rested his chin on my shoulder, leaning over slightly so he could reach my thighs.

"I wish I could describe how these legs feel wrapped around me. Soft and welcoming yet somehow also strong and fierce when they grip me tightly..."

Our eyes met in the mirror, burning lust reflected in both sets. Against my back his chest was heaving slightly.

"You're perfection, love," he said, dropping a kiss on my shoulder.

I was overwhelmed. I still didn't see it, but what I could see was that he meant it. He believed everything he said about my body. And that made it a little easier to stand there, watching his hands make their return journey up my body past my breasts until they rested on my face, his fingers stroking my cheeks and lips.

"I didn't even mention your magical eyes and that luscious mouth," he added fondly, giving me a wink.

I giggled and looked away. He turned me to face him, taking my hands in his. I saw his eyes drift to the mirror and stiffened as I realized he was looking at my reflection. He looked back at me with a reassuring smile.

"I'll have to get a second mirror sometime to demonstrate how lovely your backside is," he teased.

I tried to give him a reproving look, but he'd made me smile. He picked up the tank top and panties.

"I would never ask you to do anything that you didn't want to do," he told me seriously. "Would you be comfortable wearing these?"

I stared at him gratefully - not just for the clothes, but for all the complimentary things he'd just said about my body. Not knowing how to express it, I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed. He hugged me back, one of his hands cradling my head.

"Thanks," I whispered into his chest.

He tilted my head up for a kiss, then placed the clothes in my hands and left the room with a smile. Facing the mirror again, I studied myself before getting dressed, trying to see what he saw. Maybe I had always been too focused on the parts of my body I hated. I didn't have the trim figure that my sisters had, but I did have a proportional shape. Slipping on the tank top and panties, I inspected my reflection again, something I never did unless fully dressed. The tank had a shelf bra, which really did nothing to support my breasts, but it hugged my body nicely, accentuating the indentation of my waist. Turning slightly, I saw the cut of the panties gave enough coverage but still looked cute.

I noticed my thighs jiggle a little as I moved and made a face, then forced myself to shrug it off. This was my body, after all - a woman's body. There was likely always going to be some extra flab but there were good parts, too.

Feeling somewhat empowered, I returned to the living room where Nick was reclined on the couch. His eyes lit up when he saw me but he didn't comment on what I was wearing. I watched him closely, though. His gaze met my eyes and held them as I walked toward him. He held out an arm and I snuggled against him.

"Telly?" he asked, holding up the remote.

"Sure," I replied with a happy sigh.

His arm was around my waist, mindlessly toying with the hem of my top. I closed my eyes, reveling in the feel of his body around mine, his words echoing in my head, thinking how lucky I was to be with him.

---

I half-listened to the boisterous conversation around me, focusing on the door of the bar. When my friends suggested going out for drinks to celebrate my birthday, I had readily agreed. Nick had been gone all week for a business trip and I knew, without Gwen teasing me, that I had been moping and antsy since he left. He had surprised me by rearranging his meetings and was coming back a day early. I realized belatedly that seeing him for the first time in several days in a public place was not a smart idea, considering all I could think about was tearing off his clothes.

I straightened up and leaned slightly to keep an eye on the door as the bar filled with people. I was crowding into Maitri and she elbowed me, grinning.

"Sorry," I said, blushing.

"You've got it bad," she teased.

I nodded, smiling. It was pointless to disagree. I grabbed my phone impatiently and texted Nick.

Where are you?

I could almost hear his deep chuckle when I read his reply.

About ten steps away.

My heart leapt. "Be right back," I said quickly to the table, and rushed outside.

I whipped my head around and saw him in time to see that gorgeous smile spread across his face when he spotted me. Without thinking I sped to him, throwing my arms around his neck. He hugged me back with such force that my feet came off the ground. Kissing my cheek, he lowered me to my feet, chuckling.

"Good to see you, too," he said, tweaking my curls.

"Thanks for coming back early," I said a little shyly, hoping I hadn't made him uncomfortable.

He took my hand, squeezing lightly. "My pleasure."

"Where are your bags?" I asked, assuming he had come straight from the airport since he was still wearing a suit.

His smile faltered. "Ah, I left them with the front desk at your building. I hope you don't mind," he said quickly. "I didn't want to take the time to go all the way to my flat."

"No, not at all! Of course," I said happily. I hesitated before continuing. "Actually, Gwen's staying at Matt's tonight...if you wanted to stay over."

I looked at him through my lashes.

His eyebrows lifted. "Oh? So that's working out, then?" he commented as we walked toward the bar.

Gwen had been seeing a law school student for a few weeks now; the four of us had been out together a couple of times. Nick and I were both entertained by their completely disparate personalities. Their conversations seemed to consist of mainly good-natured debates and bickering.

"Somehow," I said, grinning. I stopped to face him. "Will you stay tonight?" I said softly.

He cupped my cheek and gave me a gentle kiss. I stopped breathing for a second.

"I would love to, darling," he murmured against my lips.

I smiled brightly at him. Inside, he greeted Gwen and Matt, and I introduced him to Ian and Mai and the few other co-workers who had joined us. I was so thrilled to have him there that it didn't occur to me to be nervous about them all meeting each other. Everyone kept buying me drinks, all of us chatting and laughing loudly. At some point I noticed that Nick had been rather quiet, still friendly but not participating much. Thinking he must be tired after his trip, I suggested we call it a night. I had taken the next day off but everyone else had to get up early.

"Are you tired?" I asked him as we walked to my apartment.

"Hm? Oh, not particularly."

I tried unsuccessfully to read his face. He looked pensive and distracted.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He looked at me in mild surprise.

"You seem like something is bothering you," I said slowly.

Slipping an arm around my waist, he pulled me to his side as we walked.

"Sorry, darling, I'm fine."

I didn't believe him, but remained silent until we got home. I poured us some wine and studied him as we sat on the couch. I nudged his leg with my foot, waiting for him to look at me.

"Did something happen on your trip?" I asked, concerned.

He took my hand, shaking his head and smiling. Stifling a sigh, I put down my glass and took his, setting it on the coffee table. I swung my legs onto his lap and slid my arms around his neck.

"Talk to me," I said firmly.

He looked into my eyes searchingly, his hand resting on my cheek. My brow wrinkled as I watched him, growing worried. He smiled apologetically and smoothed my brow with his fingers.

"Sorry, love," he murmured.

I kept watching him expectantly and he let out a small sigh.

"Your friend - Ian?"

I tilted my head questioningly. "What about Ian?"

"He...well, what is it between you?" he asked quietly.

"Between us?" I repeated. "We're co-workers, friends." My confusion grew; he knew who Ian was. "Why?"

His lips twisted in a wry smile. "He thinks of you as more than a friend."

My head jerked back. "No, he doesn't."

"He does." Nick nodded.

I didn't agree, but I also didn't want to waste time arguing the point.

"Well, so what if he does?" I said briskly.

Nick looked at me plaintively.

"Why does that upset you?" I asked, flabbergasted. "You're not jealous," I stated.

"Bloody right I'm jealous," Nick said, startling me with a harsh laugh.

He caught my surprised expression and hugged me to him. Cupping my face, he stared at me for several moments while I watched him, trying to understand his expression.

"I don't want to stand in your way, pet," he said finally.

"Stand in my way?" I said loudly. "What does that mean?"

Swinging my legs to the floor, I gripped the edge of the couch cushion. The thought that popped into my mind made my stomach twist into a knot.

"Are you saying - do you see other women?" I whispered.

We had never discussed being exclusive. It was something I just assumed, and we saw each other almost every day so really, when would he have the time. But, I reminded myself, he had just been gone for five days, on his own in Boston. I knew he traveled there for work frequently. Maybe he had someone there...

"No," Nick said adamantly, interrupting my thoughts. "I haven't dated anyone since you and I...well, since long before you moved to New York, actually. I'm not interested in meeting anyone else."

Relief flooded through me though I was still confused.

"Then what's this about?" I asked, exasperated, tucking a leg under me and facing him.

"I just - if you met someone your own age, I wouldn't want you to use me as a reason not to be with them," he told me sadly.

I let out a loud sigh. My own age. For fuck's sake.

"You know, you're not some kind of seat filler for me," I said angrily, my words coming without thinking. "You're the one I want to be with. End of story."

He looked startled, but pleased.

"But - why?" he asked haltingly.

It was my turn to look startled. "Are you serious?" I asked in disbelief. "You're - gorgeous," I breathed. "You're smart - you're...worldly, I don't know what it is about you, but - Christ, you're a catch. And I like being with you. I like how you make me feel, and not just when we're in bed. You make me happy," I finished simply.

I dropped back against the couch, crossing my arms over my chest. My frustration with this discussion - with his fixation on our age difference - had squashed all my shyness. I heard my words and resisted the urge to roll my eyes, trying not to dwell on the fact that I had basically just gushed about him to his face.

"What I don't get is what you see in me," I muttered, mostly to myself.

I felt my cheeks grow warm and pressed my lips together to prevent any further idiotic comments from escaping me. Nick gave a small gasp and I glanced his way to see him looking astonished. He pulled me into his arms.

"Darling, you underestimate yourself," he told me, his voice rich and soothing. "You're beautiful and witty, so sexy and intelligent...I feel so lucky."

I closed my eyes, feeling a pressure behind my eyes that warned tears were approaching. He brushed his lips against my temple and pulled away slightly to look at me.

"I've just worried that you could be missing out on experiences a young woman should be having while stuck with an old man -"

I narrowed my eyes. "You're not an old man, for crying out loud. There's not that many years between us and I don't even think about your age, anyway. I wish you didn't."

"I promise I'll try." He stroked my brow, holding my eyes. He sighed again. "I'm sorry for spoiling your birthday with this..."

I shrugged. Despite my irritation at his lingering discomfort about our age difference, I was actually glad it came up; glad that I'd had the chance to tell him how I felt about him and hear him respond favorably. If nothing else, I was immensely happy to hear he wasn't seeing anyone else. Our conversation tonight hadn't applied a specific label to what we had, but at least now he knew how I felt. And if I were being honest with myself, I was relieved that he didn't seem to view me as a fling.

"You didn't spoil anything," I told him, pressing my lips to his.

I rested my forehead against his, stroking his face and running my fingers through his hair. He began stroking my back insistently, our eyes locked.

"Now, take me to bed," I ordered.

He grinned, a combination of delight and lust shining from his eyes. He scooped me up and carried me to my room.

Much later, he left me naked and sprawled amongst my sheets, drifting off into sleep. When he slipped in next to me, I turned to him automatically, our legs tangling together. I felt him place something on my hip and opened my eyes to see a small jeweler's box resting there. I looked at him in surprise.

"Happy birthday," he said with a shy smile.

I sat up excitedly, my fatigue disappearing, and he chuckled. Snapping open the box with shaking fingers, I found a beautiful citrine briolette attached to a silver chain. I gasped, tears springing to my eyes. Most people thought the November birthstone was a disappointment compared to the others, but orange was one of my favorite colors, and this stone was vibrant and stunning. Whispering my thanks, I tried to remove the chain, my fingers fumbling. Nick took the box from me and drew the necklace out, holding it up for a moment before placing it around my neck. My fingers touched the pendant while he fastened it, giving the back of my neck a kiss once he'd done the clasp.




Meant To Be Ch. 03



"I love it," I told him. "It's beautiful."

He smiled warmly, drawing me back into his arms.

---

I felt Nick give a small start when we heard a key turn in the lock, but I was too relaxed to move. We were sprawled on my couch, the TV turned low so we could talk. It was a week after Thanksgiving and since I had visited my parents for the holiday, this was our first weekend together since I'd returned. We'd each left work early and met at my place; we had plans to go to a play but other than that the weekend was unscheduled. We'd been trying to decide what to do for dinner, both of us too lazy and comfortable to get up. I propped my head on Nick's arm to call a hello to Gwen.

"Hey, slackers," she teased, dropping onto a pillow on the floor. "Wild night planned?"

"We're going to see Mai's play tonight - do you guys want to come?" I asked.

"Can't. Matt promised his friend we'd go see his band." Gwen stretched her arms over her head. "Cass, can I raid your closet?"

"Of course. You don't need to ask," I reminded her.

"Well, I just want to make sure Nick doesn't have anything in there he doesn't want me to see." She smiled innocently.

My body shook as Nick laughed. "You're welcome to anything of mine as well," he told her.

"Should I just whip something up here?" I asked after Gwen left the room.

I turned to look at him when he didn't respond and found him watching me with a playful expression.

"Whip something, eh?" he repeated, twisting one of my curls around his finger.

I snickered. "For dinner," I clarified unnecessarily.

"Oh," Nick said, feigning disappointment. "Right."

Laughing, he sat up, pulling me with him.

"Let me take you out," he said. "How about Palma?"

My eyes lit up. We'd been back to the restaurant where we had what I suppose was our first official date several times since then and it had become a favorite. I kissed him and stood, telling him I was going to change. Gwen returned just as I started to walk to my room.

"Don't be mad," she said immediately.

"Gwen," I said, somewhat stunned. "You look fantastic."

She was wearing a deep red halter dress that fit her beautifully. I had gotten it a few months ago when she and I had been out shopping together, but I hadn't had an occasion to wear it yet. I liked it on me, though I wasn't sure I had the confidence to really carry it off. It looked like it was custom made for Gwen; her extra two inches of height made the dress fall in all the right places.

"I know you haven't worn it yet," she said in a rush.

I shrugged and shook my head. "You should keep it," I told her sincerely.

Involuntarily, I glanced at Nick to see his reaction, gratified to find him looking at her interestedly but not leering.

"You look lovely," he told Gwen simply, getting up to put on his shoes.

She smiled and darted into her room. I remained in the same spot until I felt Nick take my hand. I met his eyes and he brought a finger to my forehead, rubbing at the wrinkle between my brows.

"What's this about?" he asked quietly.

I smiled self-consciously. "I didn't look that good in that dress," I said with another shrug. "I wish I had her body."

Nick shot me a look of fond exasperation and sighed. He studied me for a moment, then tugged on my hand.

"Come with me," he said, leading me into the kitchen.

He pointed to a picture on the refrigerator; it was of Gwen and me from her birthday party right before Thanksgiving. We were similarly dressed in fitted black tops and jeans, our arms around each other's shoulders.

"How does Gwen look here?" he asked.

I looked between him and the photo sardonically.

"Um, she looks great?" I said sarcastically.

Nick pinched my behind and I jumped. He flashed me a smile.

"Do you think she looks skinny? Or fat?" His voice was conversational, not teasing.

"Gwen's not fat," I said emphatically. "She's got a great figure."

Nick nodded, then pointed to me in the photo.

"And see how you're right next to her - look at your legs in those jeans and hers in her jeans...you two are the same size."

I sighed. "But -"

"No buts, darling," Nick interrupted. "I know how easy it is to focus on all the things about ourselves that we don't like. You need to realize, though, that when people see you, this is what they see. A beautiful woman with a great figure, just like Gwen's."

He turned me to face him and kissed me. Taking my hands in his, he looked into my eyes.

"Understand?" he asked.

"Yes," I murmured, smiling.

He nodded, looking at me thoughtfully. I tilted my head as I watched him, knowing he would say what he was thinking soon enough and enjoying studying his face while I waited.

"Pet, I have to go to Boston the week after next – would you want to come with me?" he asked.

I actually stumbled and had to grip his waist to steady myself. My heart jumped but he continued before I could speak.

"I just need to be there for three days, so you wouldn't have to take a whole week off," he was saying quickly. "And I would be working during the day, so it might not be that fun for you, but I usually get done by four or five -"

I put a finger on his lips to silence him, grinning.

"I would love it," I told him.

He smiled brightly, taking my face in his hands and kissing me slowly. I raised myself up on my toes so I could run my fingers through his hair. We broke apart when Gwen cleared her throat behind us. I know I looked at her with a dazed expression when she giggled.

"Sorry," she said, sounding anything but apologetic. "But seriously - get a room."

A few weeks later I was hurriedly finishing my tasks at work, anxious for the weekend to begin. I was staying at Nick's before we left for Boston the following morning. Ian appeared at my desk and laughed.

"In some kind of rush?" he teased.

I glanced up, sticking my tongue out at him. He gave me his impish grin. Ian was tall and stocky, with blond hair and bright blue eyes. He was only a few years older than me, but he looked perpetually boyish somehow.

"Let's grab a drink," he suggested.

I hesitated, thinking about what I wanted to get done at home before meeting Nick. Ian rolled his eyes.

"I won't keep you from your man - just one drink."

"Smartass," I said, grinning back at him.

"So, about to head out on your big trip, huh?" Ian asked casually once we were at the bar with our drinks.

"Big trip?" I repeated jokingly.

"It's only all you've been talking about for weeks," he commented.

"Shut up, I have not," I protested, chuckling.

"What is it with you guys, anyway?" Ian said, suddenly serious.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, is it just the accent? Or that he's so much older?"

I felt a flush of annoyance and looked at him with my brow furrowed.

"What?" I asked harshly.

Ian and I had worked together for only a few months but had become close friends; he was so easygoing and affable with a great sense of humor that I was instantly comfortable with him. I had never heard the biting tone he was now speaking with. I suddenly remembered Nick's insistence that Ian thought of me as more than a friend and wondered if it was true.

"I'm just wondering," Ian said simply.

He was looking at me so openly and without guile that I felt a little guilty for being irritated.

"He's not that much older than us," I said firmly.

"He's practically our dad's ages," Ian scoffed.

"He's not even forty yet!" I declared sharply. "I don't even think about our ages, anyway."

Ian shrugged and made a doubting noise.

"What's this all about?" I asked, my annoyance returning.

"I just don't get it, Cass," Ian said defensively. "I was just trying to understand, that's all."

"Understand what?" I sighed loudly. "I like him. He's a terrific man..." I watched Ian closely. "Do you really want me to gush about all the things I like about him? Because I can."

"No," Ian said with a harsh laugh. "No, I do not. It just seems to me like there can't be much of a future when there's such a big age difference."

"That's ridiculous." I leaned back, crossing my arms across my chest. "This whole conversation is ridiculous," I added. "Did you ask me to have a drink just to try to make me feel like shit about my relationship?"

Ian looked stricken. "No," he said quietly. "I'm sorry, Cass."

I watched him silently for several minutes while he concentrated on his glass. I was still annoyed but decided to change the subject.

"What are you doing this weekend?" I asked, hoping my voice didn't sound angry.

Ian met my eyes briefly, his expression masked. He answered politely, though, and the conversation shifted to innocuous talk about his plans. By the time we finished our drinks and said our goodbyes, my temper had cooled but I still felt uneasy. I was glad to see Gwen at home when I arrived.

"Don't take it personally," she told me when I described the conversation with Ian. "He's got a crush on you, I bet he said it out of jealousy."

I frowned. I didn't like to think of Ian having a crush on me.

"The age thing," I said. "Is it that big a deal? Everyone but me seems to think about it, notice it."

Gwen shrugged. "I don't think it's that big a deal. I do think it would probably matter less if you were both, like, five years older."

"But why?" I asked, confused.

"I don't know, Cass. We just graduated from college - we're still basically kids, trying to figure out our lives. I think the difference is more noticeable just because of the stage of life you're in. But I don't think it matters, overall."

"How am I the only one who doesn't think Ian likes me that way?" I said suddenly.

Gwen smirked. "Because you don't see yourself as a woman that guys get crushes on," she pointed out.

I opened my mouth to protest that I wasn't that woman, but her amused expression made me swallow my words. She was right; I didn't see myself as desirable.

"Huh," I muttered.

I noticed Gwen smothering a laugh and couldn't help a smile as I blushed.

"Shut up," I told her.

She chuckled and shrugged.

---

I looked around the first class section of the plane excitedly as Nick grinned at me.

"This is the life," I said, relaxing against my seat.

"Thank you for coming with me," he said, lifting my fingers to his lips.

"Anytime," I told him, sighing. "I may have to quit my job and just accompany you on all your travel."

He chuckled and squeezed my hand.

We had the weekend free to explore Boston together, and once his conference events began I tried to keep myself busy during the day. Each afternoon I found myself fidgeting in our hotel room, anxious for his return. The second night of his conference I was so antsy after missing him, I greeted him wearing a lacy chemise, jumping into his arms as soon as the door closed behind him.

"I missed you, too," he said, sounding amused as his fingers tugged the hemline up to my waist.

I kissed him deeply, his hands cupping my bare behind.

"Darling, where is your underwear?" he asked sternly, nipping at my ear.

I giggled breathlessly. "Do I need some?" I asked flirtatiously.

He growled and walked us to the bed, tossing me onto the mattress. I lay still, watching him hastily unbutton his shirt and shrug it off his shoulders, my eyes following his hands as they undid his belt and his pants. My chest fluttered in excitement with each portion of skin that was revealed, smiling heatedly at him. He started to lean over me and I spread my legs slowly, studying his eyes as they trailed down my body until his gaze rested between my legs.

"Christ, pet..." He swallowed hard. "You're always beautiful...but you have never looked more sexy than you do right now."

He ran a finger up my leg, stopping at the crease of my thigh and stroking lightly.

"You're the sexy one," I whispered, still not believing that he found he so desirable.

He gave me a teasing kiss, gently flicking his tongue against mine.

"Take that nightie off," he murmured against my lips.

I sat up and slipped it over my head, flushing at the approving sound coming from deep in his throat. He gripped my waist, lazily running his tongue over my breasts.

"What would you like, my darling?" he said in a low voice, hooking his arm under one of my knees. "Do you need me to take you slowly?" he questioned teasingly. "Or do you want me to show you just how much I missed you today?"

I whimpered, twisting my fingers in his hair.

"You have to tell me," he whispered, squeezing my thigh, his stubble rough against my sensitive nipples. "Because if you don't tell me, I'm just going to fuck you hard, like I've been thinking about all day..."

I groaned, arching my chest into his mouth.

"Mm," he moaned appreciatively.

He hooked my other leg over his arm and settled his hard length against me. I shivered and wrapped my legs around his behind, rocking my hips against him. He entered me slowly, resting against me once he had filled me completely, kissing me, nibbling on my lips, my neck, my ears until I was writhing beneath him. Withdrawing slightly, he leaned his hip to one side, then rolled his hip while pressing into me. He leaned to the other side and did the same, repeating these movements until I was going crazy.

A low, moaning sound came from deep in my throat. My hands were on his chest, pinching his nipples, moving to his arms to grind my fingernails into his flesh. I leaned up a little and gave his chest little bites. I needed to feel more of him, taste him, get inside him somehow. I wanted more of this.

"Nick," I pleaded. "Please."

He continued to languidly shift his weight from side to side, looking down at me smugly as I whined.

"Please what?" he asked innocently.

I grabbed his ass, panting with frustration.

"Please, fuck me," I gasped.

He grinned a slow, sexy grin that made me melt. Adjusting his arms so my knees were raised even higher, he hunched over and captured my lips with his. I groaned into his mouth as he complied. I was pinned beneath him, only able to grip his arms and kiss him back. His hips moved steadily, forcefully, plunging himself into me. I could feel every ridge of him, bumping against that tender spot deep inside me. I came instantly, my legs shuddering around him, and if anything he increased his thrusts to the point where my body was shifting further up the bed.

"Oh, God," I cried, my head falling back. "Yes!"

I kept coming, the burning tingle coursing over my body, my ears buzzing. He didn't stop, didn't let me come down from one climax before the next swept over me again, surging through me like a freight train. I fisted the bedding, trying to leverage my body against his. My eyes flew open and I took in his taut muscles, straining as he pumped into me, the firm set of his jaw.

"Nick," I whispered, cupping his cheek.

He blinked, his features crumpling momentarily. Holding my gaze, he cried out, resting his forehead on mine as he peaked.

"Oh, fuck," he groaned. "God, love – Cass – so good, God," he gasped.

I smiled triumphantly, contracting around him.

"How am I supposed to leave you for work in the morning," he mumbled, his head nestled in my neck, his shaft still moving inside me.

I chuckled, locking my arms gratefully around him. Even after how close we had become over these few months, he could still be so reserved with me. It was empowering to see him lose himself during lovemaking, to watch his resistance shatter. I suspected our age difference still troubled him, which I found ridiculous. I knew there were no reassuring words I could offer that would convince him, but surely he had to see – feel – how right it was when we were together, when he was inside me, when we were able to share something that powerful. 

---

I paced the floor of Nick's living room, apprehension eating a hole in my stomach. I had been pacing for close to half an hour. It was his birthday and I had told him I had a surprise for him, and I'd spent the last half hour talking myself out of talking myself out of it. Finally I heard his key in the lock and it was too late to change my mind.

When he walked into the room, I was seated on the couch wearing one of his crisp white dress shirts, unbuttoned to my navel, and my black high-heeled pumps. My legs were crossed, my arms casually draped along the back of the couch. Watching him as he entered, my stomach still in knots, I forced myself to remain still.

His eyes swept the room expectantly, probably only taking a few seconds to find me, but it felt like tortuous hours for me until I saw his reaction. His eyes widened and he immediately dropped his briefcase to the floor. I stifled the nervous giggle threatening to emerge and gave him a small smile. He started toward me and I uncrossed my legs, placing my feet on the floor, my hands dangling between my knees. His shirt was long enough that it hung to my thighs, but I know the way I was seated led him to suspect I wasn't wearing underwear.

"Jesus," he breathed as he approached.

"Happy birthday," I said, looking up at him.

He was standing directly in front of me now and the bulge already forming in his trousers was right at eye level. I moistened my lips without thinking. He held his hands out and I laced my fingers with his, standing. I raised my head for a kiss, and he crushed me to him, his mouth devouring mine in greedy kisses until my legs were trembling. He gripped my shoulders and held me away, his eyes running down my body. He met my eyes, looking as if he was struggling to speak.

"Are you hungry?" I asked softly.

I started to gesture to the dining room table but he picked me up, cradling me in his arms.

"Yes," he said in a rough voice, walking to the bedroom.

I giggled, placing a hand on his chest.

"Put me down," I said laughingly. "I made dinner."

"Sorry, love. You're going to be my dinner. And dessert," he said mischievously.

He sat me on the edge of the bed, leaning over me. I pushed his shoulders back.

"Nope," I told him firmly. "We eat dinner first, before it gets cold." I ran my hands up his shirt. "But you are wearing far too many clothes," I added.

"Shouldn't the birthday boy get to dictate the order of events?" he asked.

I chuckled and leaned back on the bed, propping myself up on my elbows, watching his eyes widen as my position made his shirt gape open across my chest.

"Okay," I said after a short silence. "You can decide. We can jump into bed now, and then eat disgusting cold steak and lobster later."

I ran my foot up his leg, stopping with the toe of my shoe pressing against his crotch.

"Or," I continued. "We can have a nice dinner of delicious food...with me sitting in your lap and feeding you...maybe taking a break between courses if you like..."

I looked at him suggestively, enjoying his response to my boldness. His lips were parted slightly and his eyes looked dazed, his chest heaving. I paused for a moment, amazed that I was dressed like this, teasing him this way, with only a hint of self-consciousness. Planning this out ahead of time had been nerve-wracking, but in the moment, seeing his reaction, it almost felt natural.

"I got you dessert, too," I said, my voice low and breathy. "Champagne and strawberries...and ice cream...chocolate syrup," I went on, stretching my leg so that my pump was now resting on his stomach.

His eyes ran down my bare leg before meeting my gaze. 

"And the syrup doesn't necessarily need to go on the ice cream," I added.

Nick sucked in a sharp breath, his hands clenched into fists at his side. I lowered my leg and sat up, wrapping my arms around his thighs, pulling him so he was standing between my legs.

"What do you think?" I asked brightly.

"I think -" he said, his eyes glazed. "I think - this is the best birthday I've ever had."




Meant To Be Ch. 03



I smirked. "We haven't even started yet," I pointed out.

He pulled me to my feet, chuckling. His lustful expression calmed into tenderness as he curled his fingers on my cheek, staring into my eyes. He ran a hand through my hair, kissing me sweetly, our lips and tongues caressing each other for several minutes. I undid his pants while we kissed, then unbuttoned his shirt. Leaning away slightly, I ran my hand down his tie.

"Take this off for me," I said softly.

He gave me a surprised look and I winked.

"I like watching your hands," I told him, my eyes following his fingers as they loosened the knot and then pulled the tie off.

I let him shrug off his shirt and slip the undershirt over his head, then looked at him thoughtfully, stroking his chest. Picking up his shirt, I put it back on him, rolling up the cuffs. I saw him smirking at me.

"It'll give me something to take off later," I murmured. 

I studied him, then smiled, sliding my arms up his chest until they wrapped around his neck. He flinched slightly and took one of my wrists in his hand.

"What's this?" he asked in surprise.

"Oh!" I had forgotten. "Your birthday present."

I held up both wrists to show him the Kandinsky print cufflinks. I'd gotten them from the gift shop at the Guggenheim where we'd seen the exhibit the day of the rainstorm when this had all began. Nick stared at them for a few moments, a smile growing on his face.

"I love them, pet," he said softly. "Thank you."

"Happy birthday," I whispered, brushing my lips against his. "Dinner?" I asked.

He kicked his pants off his feet and picked me up, sitting at the table and settling me on his lap. We ate slowly and with much laughter as I soon discovered that our position wasn't conducive to cutting steak and cracking lobster, not to mention the distraction of our bodies in close contact.

"I'll have this cleaned," I told him as I splattered butter on his shirt for the second time.

"Toss it, I don't care," he said with a laugh.

I dropped a strawberry in his glass of champagne and held it for him to sip. I then tipped the glass to finish it in one drink, catching the berry in my lips. I looked at him, my eyebrows raised invitingly. Closing his mouth around the berry, he bit down, making me jump slightly when the juice squirted down my throat. Without removing his mouth, he kissed me, our tongues swirling around the berry remnants.

"Do you want to take one of those breaks I mentioned?" I murmured against his lips.

He groaned into my mouth. I turned in his lap to face him, cupping his face and kissing his lips before moving to his ear, his neck, and down his chest. I slid off his lap and hooked my fingers on the waist of his boxers, looking into his eyes. He raised his hips so I could remove them, then grabbed my waist, his fingers massaging my lower back.

"You look positively gorgeous, darling," he said breathlessly.

I blushed and gave him a pleased smile. He moved his hands so his thumbs met over my stomach, then suddenly pulled the shirt open, undoing the few buttons I had fastened. I giggled when I heard the clatter of one of the buttons as it flew across the room. Nudging the shirt open, he swept his thumbs across my nipples, then ran his hands down my body until they were cupping my behind.

"You're like a goddess," he breathed. "All perfect and glowing..."

"Nick," I whispered, overcome.

He met my eyes briefly with a stunned smile before moving them over my body again. I watched him blink rapidly, then shake his head slightly. Resting a hand on his cheek, I stroked his face until he met my eyes again. My breath caught at his expression. He looked dazed and speechless. And, I realized with concern, somewhat confused or fearful.

"What is it?" I asked worriedly.

His smile was enigmatic. He just shook his head again.

"Like I said, best birthday I've had," he said, his voice wavering. He cleared his throat. "Thank you, love."

I ran my thumb across his bottom lip, searching his face. His expression had cleared, his voice steadier. He gave me a devilish look and I grinned, lowering myself to my knees between his legs. I took him in my mouth slowly, teasing him with my tongue and hands. I circled the tip, stroking him lightly, alternately taking him deep. He began pulling on my shoulders but I resisted until he overpowered me. He lifted me into his lap again, his chest heaving against me as his lips found mine. Shoving the shirt off my shoulders, he moved his lips to my breasts, swirling his tongue around my nipples before closing his lips around them. I was gripping his arms, my head falling back as the charge of electricity ran through my body.

"Put your arms around me, love," he gasped, hooking my legs around his waist.

I clasped my hands behind his neck and he stood with me in his arms, rocking my hips against him as he walked to the couch. He lowered me to the cushions gently and hovered over me, his mouth moving from my lips to my ear, from my neck to my breasts until I was writhing and tugging his shirt off.

"Nick," I panted.

He sat back, his hands resting lightly on my thighs, and grinned.

"Shall we finish dinner?" he asked innocently.

"Get back here," I ordered, narrowing my eyes.

He chuckled, giving me a quick kiss. 

"Not yet," he said mischievously. 

I gaped at him as he walked away, hearing him open the refrigerator and the sounds of bottles clinking around. He returned with a bowl of ice cream and the bottle of chocolate syrup, a gleeful smile on his face. I moaned in anticipation and his smile grew. 

"We haven't finished dinner," I pointed out. "We can't have dessert yet." 

"We most certainly can," he told me, taking a bite of ice cream. 

I watched his tongue swirl around the spoon, my breath catching. Dipping the spoon back in the bowl, he held it to my lips and I licked it off slowly, my eyes locked on his. He turned the spoon and purposely dripped some ice cream on my chest, grinning triumphantly when I flinched and gasped. 

"Allow me," he murmured, cleaning it up. 

My head fell back and I arched into his mouth. Something sticky fell onto my skin and my eyes flew open to see him drawing a heart on my belly with the syrup. I giggled, scooping a drop of syrup on my finger and bringing it to my mouth. His eyes became heated and I repeated the gesture, following it with another finger full of chocolate presented to him. He drew my finger into his mouth, his tongue hot as it licked my finger clean. 

He gave my finger a gentle bite before releasing it, then proceeded to lick off the chocolate heart on my stomach. He continued decorating my body, following each syrupy design with his tongue. I was convinced the bottle had to be nearly empty by the time he stopped, sitting back on his heels to look at me smugly. I was flushed and panting, every inch of me tingling with anticipation. I held my arms out to him and he brought his lips to mine. I drank him in eagerly, tasting chocolate and ice cream and him, the flavor making me whimper against his lips. 

"Time to work off all those calories," he said suggestively.

He slid his hands down my legs and wrapped a hand around each ankle, lifting my legs so that my thighs rested on my stomach, my bent knees on my chest. Kneeling, his fingers found my opening and he groaned as he teased me. I began whimpering and he quickly positioned himself, entering me fully in a few thrusts. I sighed, stroking his arms. He moved with steadily increasing force, pausing teasingly on occasion, until I was crying out and begging. Finally he sped up, bringing me to climax twice before he shouted out my name and slammed into me.

"Happy birthday," I gasped when I could speak again.

"Best - birthday - ever." He held my face, brushing his mouth against my lips, then my eyelids, my forehead, my cheeks with each word.



Meant to Be Ch. 04



The air was moist, warm and thick. The big plane seemed to disappear in the heavy mist. Yet as one looked up they could see only blue sky. It was early morning at Henley Heath and it was time for another maximum effort. In a few minutes the quiet base would be filled with roar of mighty machines and the smell of exhaust fumes. Moving like ghosts, the crews approached their planes.

"Come on, Aaron," Bill Archer said. "What am I going to tell the girls?"

"I don't really care," Aaron replied, not looking at him. "You set it up. You figure it out."

Lt. Bill Archer, co-pilot of "Tantalizing Takeoff" and Aaron's best friend, had set up a double date with his girlfriend and Aaron's girlfriend, Bridget. At least, he thought she was. Now this.

"What the hell is going on between you and Bridget?" He grabbed Aaron's arm and stopped him.

Wrenching his arm free, he exploded. "Nothing is going on between us! Never was and never will be. Now leave it!" There was a look of anger in his face. No one had seen Aaron lose his temper before. It was what they all admired in him; the ability to remain calm at all times.

"Hey guys, calm down," Lt. Joe Gilles, the navigator, stepped between them. "What's the problem?"

"Nothing!" Archer fairly spat the word out.

"Hey, if it's about women, I'm your man," Gilles laughed trying to lighten the mood. He was married and had a sweet wife back home in Minnesota but here in England, every woman was fair game. He was actually hurt when Archer set up that first meeting between Aaron and Bridget, not with him. "Hey, is this about that school teacher? Man, she's a hot ticket."

Aaron wheeled and grabbed Gilles by his flight jacket. "Shut the hell up or God help me, you'll be eating your next meal through a straw. Got it?" He pushed the navigator away and climbed into the waiting B-17.

Archer shook his head and Gilles stared dumbly at him. "It's going to be a long flight today," he mumbled.

"Ouch," Vicki squealed as she cut herself with the scissors. All ready blood was coming from the wound. She stuck the bleeding finger into her mouth.

"Are you alright, dear?" her mother said moving closer to the counter. "Let me see."

I'll be fine, mother."

"You have been awfully absent minded these past few minds. Something on your mind?"

"No."

"I bet it is that nice young man."

"No, it isn't," Vicki lied. She had been thinking about Aaron a lot. She couldn't get him out of mind. It bothered her too. She felt she was acting like those silly teenage girls at the dance. She was 26, not 16 and a widow. She should be acting more mature than this, but she wasn't.

That night dancing with him and then sitting together watching falling stars was amazing. It brought out feelings in her she never knew she had or were buried way deep inside. He told her to make a wish on one of the falling stars and she did. She wished the night would never end but it did and he left. The feelings didn't.

"Are you listening to me, Vicki? I swear you're acting like moon-sick calf," her mother said.

"What? Mother."

"Stop punishing yourself. You're only human. You're a young, pretty woman and you met a man like Aaron, you're bound to have feelings."

"What are you talking about?" Vicki moved to the other side of the counter.

"I'm talking about you falling in love."

"I am not," she replied indignantly. "I love Robin. How can I love another man so quickly?"

Mother moved close to Vicki and took her hand. Looking intently into her face, she said softly, "You never loved Robin and now your feelings for Aaron are scaring you."

Vicki tried to pull away. "What are you saying? That I didn't love Robin? That's absurd."

"You had just turned 20 when you met Robin. An older man, the bright lights, he swept you off your feet. You may have thought you loved him and maybe you did. But now admit it, you are experiencing some strong feelings about Aaron, feelings you never had before and you're scared. A mother knows her daughter."

Vicki began to cry uncontrollably. She buried her head into her mother's shoulder. Between the sobs, she said, "Its happening too fast. I shouldn't feel this way but I do. What if he doesn't feel this way towards me? Maybe he cares for someone else. I feel like such a fool."

Her mother held her and patted her head. "It's the war, darling. It is bringing people together then ripping them apart. It will work out. Give it time." She took out a hankie and wiped Vicki's face. "There,there."

Vicki's mother left and went to the storeroom, leaving Vicki alone with her thoughts.

What her mother said about her love for Robin was true. At first she believed she did love him and he, her. The parties, the people, the travel, the bright lights, all dazzled the young girl from Duckworth. Then there was Robin himself. Tall, dark, and suave, he literally swept her off her feet. He was 5 years older than her and seemed to have been everywhere. She was a novice in love and he was what she expected of a lover. After they were married, Vicki noticed a change. She blamed herself for not being the wife, the lover Robin wanted. The marriage soured. She argued, he calmly reasoned. She retreated to her room and blamed herself, he casually to the Officers club with the boys. In the outside world, they were a perfect couple, she the perfect wife. She would do nothing to disprove this so she suffered in silence.

Then came the war and the news of Robin's disappearance over France. Her reaction bothered her. She didn't cry or grieve. Instead she retreated to Duckworth and shut herself off.

Now Aaron showed up and rudely interrupted the life she created. The feelings he aroused in her were new but exciting. "Perhaps it was time to live," Vicki thought. "Who knows what might happening today or even tomorrow?" She was not going to wait and give it time. She felt she didn't have that much and she wasn't going to waste a single minute. When Aaron came again and he would, she'd be ready.

Aaron was incredible angry with himself. He let a personal issue interfere with a more important job. That job was flying a B-17 and to bring it home safely. The lives of 9 other men depended on him to do his job and he felt he let them down on the last mission. The fact they all returned without a scratch did nothing to ease his mind.

The problem was very simple yet complicated at the same time. It was an age old problem. He felt he had to choose between two women and unlike Gilles, it was the right thing to do. He felt he was about to make the wrong decision.

One hand was Bridget. She was everything he could ask for. She was young, bright, and willingly. He felt very comfortable with her and she was easy on the eyes. She was just the type of girl a boy from southern Pennsylvania would bring home to meet his parents. That was why he felt she wasn't for him. He didn't want a girl from England to remind him that he could find one like her just down the street.

As he thought about it, the real problem was his growing feelings for Mrs. Victoria Scottsdale. Even from that first chance meeting, there was something about her that stuck in his mind. He wanted to know more about her. Why else would he pull that stupid stunt at the flower shop? Even that wasn't enough. No, he asked if he could see her again and then went to see Bridget, expecting some love-making. When he saw her again, they went to an old folks dance and then sat under the stars afterward. And he had a great time, no, a fantastic time. There was something about her that intrigued him that drew him to her.

The monkey wrench seemed to be that she was married. She never mentioned her husband but she had a picture of the two of them on the shelf behind the counter at the shop. He was dressed in a RAF uniform so obviously he was in the service. But where was he? She never said anything about him and he felt it wasn't his place to ask. So on the face of things, it was very stupid of him to spend any energy pursuing a married woman when an available girl was his for taking. Despite the common sense that stared him in the eyes, he knew what he was going to do.

"Glad you got my note. I hoped you were free," Aaron said to Vicki as they walked to the movies. "I only have a 8 hour pass."

How could she tell him that from the moment she got the note, she was ready to see him. She changed her outfit 3 times before she found the right one. Her light lavender dress seemed to float around her. She hoped he would like it. She even fretted about her make-up. She wanted to be perfect.

"I thought we could take in a movie, if it alright with you?"

The only theater in town was showing "Mrs. Miniver" so it was that or nothing. Aaron bought the tickets and they went in. They sat towards the back, as there weren't many people inside. They could have sat anywhere.

When the movie began, Aaron leaned over to Vicki and whispered, "What is a movie without candy?" With that he reached into his pocket and took out a Hershey bar. He broke it into pieces. "Here."

She took a small piece and put it in her mouth. It melted in it as she savored the flavor. It was heavenly.

As the movie continued, they shifted in their seats. Their knees touched and neither moved to break the contact. Seeing her hand resting on her knee, Aaron took a chance. He placed his hand on hers. She rolled her hand so he could hold it. They sat that way throughout the rest of the movie.

On the walk home, Vicki was so excited she was giddy. She couldn't stop talking. She talked about the movie, how beautiful Greer Garson looked, the wonderful taste of the chocolate. She hooked her arm around Aaron's and leaned in close. There was a spring in her step.

Aaron walked in almost complete silence. He let her talk; only answering her when she asked him a direct question. He was deep in thought, knowing what he had to say. He just needed to say it right.

They stopped at the front gate. He hesitated.

"Would you like to come in," Vicki asked as she pushed open the gate.

He drew back. "I don't think I should," he said.

"Why," she asked with a puzzled look.

He took her by the hands and took a deep breath. "I don't think we...I should see you any more."

"I don't understand," she said with a catch in her throat.

"Just don't think we should. I don't think your husband would appreciate it."

"My husband!" Vicki gave off a short laugh. "Oh Aaron, come with me." She led him on to the porch where they sat together.

As they sat Vicki began. "My husband, Robin, has been dead almost 4 years. He was shot down over France in 1940. We had been married just over 4 years."

"Now I feel even worse," Aaron said.

"No, don't say that," She caressed his face. "If I didn't want to see you, I would have told that day in the shop. The truth is I would like to keep seeing you."

"I want to keep seeing you too. For as long as you like."

They stopped talking and looked at each other. They each knew what was next. They kissed. It was warm, gentle kiss. It was just like Vicki imagined it would be. She felt like a young girl with her first kiss. Perhaps it was, it was her first kiss with the man that she falling in love with.



Meant To Be Ch. 04



Dear readers,

Thank you so much for your constant encouragement and feedback. I love reading your comments and emails and I appreciate them all!

I apologize that Chapter 4 took so long to be published, but I do hope you enjoy the conclusion of Kelsey and Nathan's story. 

Please vote, comment, email...anything that you think will help me improve as a writer!

xoxo,

Bethanie

"Fuck! Oh fuck...come with me! Come with me, Kelsey!" 

Nathan gripped her hips tightly from behind as Kelsey buried her face into his sheets. She cried out into the mattress as he pounded into her relentlessly. She had just come over to talk things out, yet here she was, about to experience her fourth orgasm of the night. Her body ached, her mind was clouded, but her pussy demanded more. She needed every single thrust that Nathan could give her. 

Her senses were on overload as he pushed himself into her. She could feel both of their bodies inching closer to climax. 

Kelsey rolled her head to the side. Remembering that his roommates were all at home, she tried to be quiet, but she knew that they had to have known what was going on. She didn't care.

"Mmmm, Nate. I'm close! Fuck...I'm al-almost there!" she panted.

The sounds of Nathan's hips and balls slapping against her from behind were enough to push her over the sexual edge. Her hips jerked and her pussy clamped down tightly around his shaft.

"Oh fuck yeah! Uhhhh...fuck!" Nathan groaned as his own climax pulsed through him and into her.. 

Kelsey reached down between her legs and massaged the spot where their bodies came together. She felt his cum pulsing into her. She groaned as he filled her and clawed helplessly at her flesh. 

After several seconds of trying to catch their breath, they finally collapsed next to each other on the bed. Kelsey was laying on her stomach as she stared at Nathan, who was staring blankly at the ceiling.

"You ok?" she asked quietly.

She saw Nathan swallow, then nod.

"Yeah. I feel like an ass for talking to you the way I did, though."

"Don't. I should have told you about New York as soon as I found out. I just didn't know how."

Nathan was quiet for a few minutes, his fingers trailing along the skin of her bare ass. Suddenly, he rolled over and brushed the hair off of her face. 

"You should go," he said quietly. 

Kelsey jerked away from him. 

"What are you talking about? Just like that?" 

Nathan shook his head. "Trust me, Kelsey...those are the last words that I want to say to you, but let's be rational about this for a second. This kind of opportunity doesn't come along all everyday. If you stay here, I'll have this horrible guilt. Like I'm holding you back," 

Kelsey opened her mouth to respond, but Nathan held up his hand.

"No. Kelsey don't argue. If this is what you want, if this is what's best for you, then you need to do it."

Kelsey shook her head. She crawled on top of Nathan and pressed her naked body into his.

"I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"Of everything. Of living in New York by myself. Of falling in love with it and not wanting to leave. Of leaving you," she whispered. 

"Kelsey, the good thing about this is that you know I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be here."

"But I can't ask you to do long distance, Nathan."

He shrugged. "Ok, so we just take this slow. One day at a time while you're there. If we decide to make it official, then we will figure it out. If we decide that the distance is too much, then we can figure that out, too. It will be ok, Kels."

"You're just saying that to make me feel better."

Nathan laughed. "Well, yeah...kind of. I don't want to be saying any of this."

Kelsey leaned up and kissed his soft lips. She closed her eyes and tried to freeze that moment in her mind: Their naked bodies pressed against each other. His hands on her lower back, her hands on his chest. Her hair falling down around their faces. She inhaled deeply and smelled the faint scent of his cologne and their sweat. She could feel his heartbeat underneath her palms and his cum as it dripped slowly from her pussy. She could hear his gentle sigh as their kissing went from tender to passionate. 

Kelsey's hands slid from his chest to his jaw. She placed her knees on either side of his body and pulled him up to the sitting position. His hands grazed her back as they kissed. 

"I love you, Nathan," she groaned against his lips.

"I love you, too."

Kelsey slipped her tongue between his lips as they kissed and cuddled the next hour of their lives away. 

By the time Kelsey got in her car to go home, her lips felt almost as raw as her heart.

>>>>>

"Good morning, I'm calling for Mr. Fisher. This is Kelsey Bradford, returning his call."

"Just a moment."

Kelsey paced in her room. Once she got home from Nathan's house the night before, she tried distracting herself in any way possible. She tried to edit the family photos, she tried sleeping, she tried watching some television. Nothing worked. She had been awake the entire night, just waiting for this very moment where she had to call and talk to David Fisher herself. 

Just as Kelsey sat down on her bed, he answered.

"Well, the elusive Miss Bradford. I was beginning to think that you weren't going to return my call."

"I'm very sorry for the delay, Mr. Fisher."

"No need to apologize. I realize that this is a big decision. Let me give you a little bit more information about the internship," he started.

Kelsey listened as he explained the pay, the hours and the responsibilities that would be expected of her. She asked a few questions here and there, but really tried to focus on the information that he was giving her. 

As their conversation came to a close, Kelsey explained that she had another internship lined up and asked for a couple more days to make her decision. Mr. Fisher kindly agreed and she told him that she'd have an answer for him by Friday.

Kelsey hung up the phone and started looking up details about the area of New York where she would be. She looked up apartments, transportation and the local neighborhoods. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine living in a completely different world than her sleepy little hometown. 

Kelsey clicked a folder icon on her computer and pulled up the picture she took of her and Nathan, kissing in the field on Monday. Her eyes darted between the picture and the information she had written down during her conversation with David. She sighed and walked to her bed. She fell back onto the mattress, mentally thanking her boss for the mid-week day off. Her eyes got heavier and heavier, until finally she fell into a restless sleep. 

>>>>>

"Kelsey? Can I come in?" 

Kelsey rolled over when she realized that her Mom was knocking on her bedroom door. She yawned and sat up. 

"Yeah...come in."

Kelsey's Mom cracked the door open and smiled at her daughter. She walked in and sat on the edge of her bed.

"Sorry. Looks like I woke you up."

Kelsey shook her head. "It's ok. I need to get up anyway. What's up?"

"I just wanted to see if you had made any decisions about New York."

Kelsey stared at her bed. She picked at an invisible thread nervously.

"I think I'm going to go, Mom." Her eyes drifted up to meet her Mother's. Kelsey saw the sadness behind her eyes.

"Ok," she said, trying desperately to sound positive and brave. "If you think this is the best decision for you and your career, then your Dad and I are behind you 100%." 

Kelsey laughed. "Dad told you to say that, didn't he?"

"Yes, damn it," her Mom sighed heavily. "Kelsey, this sucks."

Kelsey couldn't help but laugh at her Mom's sudden lack of poise. 

"I know, Mom, but it'll be ok. We'll just be a plane ride away. I can come home on weekends occasionally if there isn't a big project happening, and you and Dad are welcome any time, of course. It will be ok."

"I know," she said, sniffing back a tear. "I know you're an adult now and that you need to make your own choices, this just..." she paused. "This just isn't how I imagined things happening. I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around it, that's all."

"What do you mean?"

Her Mom shook her head. "I can't. Your Dad made me promise that I wouldn't even bring this up."

Kelsey rolled her eyes. "Well, it's a little late for that. What are you talking about?"

Kelsey watched as her Mom's shoulders sagged in defeat. 

"As a Mom, you just have these images of what your child's life will be like. I just imagined you, coming home from college, starting your own photography business," she paused and looked at Kelsey, "then finding someone who makes you happy and settling down. Close to home. So when Mr. Powell randomly mentioned New York, to say that I was shocked is a bit of an understatement."

"I know, Mom. I just needed to make this decision on my own, you know?"

"I know, sweetie."

Kelsey paused. "Mom? When you talk about me settling down with someone...finding someone who makes me happy...you're talking about Nathan, aren't you?"

She nodded timidly. "I'm sorry. I know that we can't force a relationship on you two or anything, we've just all seen it over the years."

"Seen what?"

"How happy you make each other. You have had boyfriends here and there, and he dated that piece of work...what's her name? Amy?" 

Kelsey nodded.

"God. That girl was a train wreck, huh? Well, we have just watched the two of you grow and we know how happy you are when you're together. Nathan is a different person when you're home."

A lump formed in the back of Kelsey's throat. She couldn't talk about Nathan anymore. She stood up. 

Her Mom cleared her throat. "Speaking of Nathan, everyone is coming over in a little bit to talk with your Dad and I about the remodeling that they're going to do this fall. You going to be here?"

Kelsey nodded. "Yeah. I'm going to take a shower really quick, then I'll be downstairs."

"Ok. I didn't mean to upset you sweetie, you know that right? The last thing I want is to discourage you from something. It's just hard letting go."

Kelsey smiled. "It's alright, Mom. It will be hard for everyone, but we'll figure it out." 

Her Mom hugged her tightly before leaving the room. Kelsey pressed her forehead against her bedroom door and closed her eyes. 

As excited as she was about the opportunity, she couldn't ignore the growing pit in her stomach. 

Kelsey shook away the anxiety and walked to the bathroom. As she stepped into the shower, she closed her eyes and tried to let the warm spray of water wash away her anxiety. 

She knew that having the Lowe's over that evening was going to be the perfect chance to tell everyone that she had decided to go to New York. 

She just had no idea how to tell them, or how she was going to be able to look Nathan in the eye as she broke the news. 

>>>>>

"Well, what if we took out that wall?" 

"Nah...then you'd have to put one up right over there."

"Ok, well hang on. Is this a load bearing wall?"

Kelsey sat in the living room, listening as her parents, Dave and Nathan all discuss the plans they had for the remodel project. 

Kelsey tried to pay attention, but her mind was somewhere else. She sipped on some water. After several minutes, everyone came into the living room and started to talk about the plans for Kelsey's room once she moved out. Kelsey swallowed. She knew this was the time to make her announcement. 

"Um...I have something that I need to say," Kelsey said nervously. The room became quiet. Even Nathan's brothers stopped their handheld video games. Kelsey felt her heart leap into her throat and her cheeks get hot as every pair of eyes in the room stared at her. They knew what was coming. Everyone did. Kelsey tried to look at everyone, but couldn't bring herself to look at Nathan. 

She took a sip of water and tried to swallow the lump in her throat.

"Well," she started. "Everyone knows now that I was offered a pretty prestigious internship in New York. The photographer's name is David Fisher. He is really well known and very talented. I talked with him on the phone today and discussed the details...the ins and outs of how this would all work. I did a little researching and a lot of soul searching, and I've decided that I'm going take it. I'll be leaving for New York in just a few weeks."

The room was silent. No one knew what to say. Kelsey looked down at the floor. Suddenly, her parents and Dave and Nancy all came to their senses and started to congratulate her on the wonderful opportunity. She knew that they were trying their hardest to sound excited for her, so she did her best to play along. After hugging each of the adults, she managed to look up at Nathan. He stood up and walked to Kelsey. He leaned down and kissed her on the cheek, but couldn't bring himself to say anything to her. 

"Excuse me," he muttered. He walked to the kitchen and out the garage door. Kelsey closed her eyes as she heard the door close gently behind him. All of their parents just looked at each other, then to Kelsey.

"Um...I need to go talk to him. Excuse me."

Kelsey walked out of the room and out the door. She stepped out of the garage and into the warm evening air. She looked around but didn't see Nathan anywhere. Suddenly, she heard a gentle splashing sound. She walked to the fence and peaked into the Lowe's backyard. Nathan was sitting on the edge of the pool, kicking his feet in the water. Kelsey stepped inside the gate and walked towards him slowly.

"Nate?" 

He looked up at her, then back down to the water.

"Can I sit?"

He nodded. 

Kelsey sat down on the concrete edge of the pool. She pulled her flip flops off and tossed them behind her. She dipped her feet into the water. Nathan didn't say a word. Kelsey scooted her body closer to his and linked an arm into his. She rested her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes.

"Are you ok?" she asked quietly.

Nathan sighed. "I will be."

"Are you mad?"

"No. I know this is a great opportunity for you. I'm just trying to decide what we should do for the next few weeks."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, do we keep seeing each other like we have been? Do we keep having sex? Do I keep telling you that I love you? Will all of that just make it worse when you leave?"

Kelsey exhaled heavily and lifted her head off of his shoulder. 

"Nathan, this is my decision. I want this to be as easy as possible for you. We are going to take it one day at a time when I leave, right? If you think that we need to back off now, then say so. It will be hard, but if that's what you think is best, then I'll do whatever you want, ok?"

Nathan didn't say anything. Kelsey turned her body towards his. 

"Nathan, look at me."

He looked up at Kelsey. The glowing reflection of the water danced across his face. Kelsey smiled. 

"Whatever you want," she emphasized.

Nathan stared at her for several seconds. The look in his eyes told her everything. She knew what was coming. 

"I think we need to back off," he mumbled.

Even though she knew that's what he would say, hearing the words fall from his mouth were still felt like a knife to the heart. 

Kelsey slowly pulled her arm out of his and folded her hands in front of her. The only sound was the pool water lapping at their ankles. She squared her shoulders and tried to be brave. 

"Ok. I completely understand. Just remember...I'm only a phone call, a text, a plane ride away. And, I'm still here for a few weeks. Ok? This doesn't have to mean that our friendship or relationship is over. This is just another chapter. Aright?" 

Nathan didn't look at her. He just nodded. "Ok. I'll be alright. I just need a little time to adjust to this."

"Ok. I'll go." 

Kelsey stood up and grabbed her shoes. She started to walk away, but knew that she couldn't before she did one last thing. Not knowing if it would be the last chance he gave her or not, Kelsey walked back to Nathan's side. She kneeled beside him and took his handsome face in her hands. She turned it towards her. She searched his blue eyes and admired his full lips. 

"No matter what happens, Nathan, I will always love you. I will spend the rest of my life, comparing every man I meet to you. You will always be my best friend, no matter how many miles separate us. I need you to remember that. Nothing... no job, no distance, no separation... is ever going to change that. Maybe this will somehow bring us closer, maybe it won't. I don't know. But I do know how hard this is for you...to sit here and pretend that you're ok with it. I know you aren't. I'm not ok about leaving you, either. But if this is meant to be...it will be. I believe that. I need you to believe that, too."

Nathan closed his eyes. His hands came up and grabbed Kelsey's wrists. He pressed his lips into hers and gave her the most gentle, heartbreaking kiss imaginable. 

Kelsey pulled back and inhaled unsteadily. Nathan leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead before letting go of her wrists. 

She knew that there were no words for what they were feeling. She knew she needed to leave. 

She stood up and walked back to her parents house without ever turning around to see Nathan, knowing that looking at him would only make it harder. She went inside the house, walked straight by their parents and up to her bedroom, closing the door behind her. 

Kelsey sat down at her computer and started to edit the family pictures. As she cropped a photo of the Lowe's, she felt a hot tear sliding down her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned back against her desk chair. 

Suddenly, she could hear Nathan come back in the house, talking with her Dad. She stood up and walked downstairs just as Nathan was walking out to his truck to leave. Kelsey quietly slipped out the door behind him and ran to his truck just as he got in. She opened the passenger side and climbed in with him. 

"Fuck! You scared the shit out of me! What are you doing?"

"Listen, I know that you said you needed space, but I just want to be with you. For however long that ends up being. 2 weeks, 3 weeks...I don't care. I just want you, Nathan. Can't you just drive somewhere so we can be alone?" Kelsey asked as she slid across the seat.

Nathan groaned as Kelsey's palm slid up his thigh, resting just inches away from his dick. 

"Kelsey, I-"

"We don't have to talk. Just take me somewhere. Please?"

Nathan sighed and started his truck. He pulled away and started to drive down the road. Kelsey moved closer to him and nuzzled her face against his neck. Her lips fastened to his skin, kissing and nibbling gently. Her mouth wandered to his earlobe as he pulled onto a lonely country road. The windows were down and the warm summer air blew through the truck, blowing Kelsey's shirt up her back. Nathan's right hand came behind her and pulled her in as close as she could get without sitting directly on his lap. 

"Mmmm. I love kissing you. I can't believe I went so long without doing this," she mumbled against his jaw. 

Nathan sighed contently. Kelsey angled her body so her head was directly over Nathan's lap. She could feel his thigh muscles tensing as he used the gas and brakes, driving them farther and farther into the uninhabited country roads that surrounded their small town. 

As the roads went from paved to gravel, Kelsey's lips went from his stomach to the seam of his pants. She could feel his cock starting to bulge against the zipper, so she worked it down and reached in to expose his dick. She freed it from his pants and Nathan moaned. 

"Ohhh, fuck," he growled. 

Kelsey didn't need anymore encouragement. She closed her eyes and wrapped her mouth around the sensitive head of his cock. Her tongue lapped against it, but the road was becoming too uneven. She let Nathan's dick pop free from between her lips as she sat up. She glanced around. There was nothing but newly growing fields. He had driven them to an abandoned barn not far from the edge of town. He backed his truck down an old dirt road and shut off the engine. 




Meant To Be Ch. 04



The only thing Kelsey could hear were crickets chirping in the fields. The only thing she could see was darkness and the soft reflection of the moon on Nathan's windshield. She smiled and turned to him.

"This is perfect. Any chance I get to be alone with you, I'm going to take it. Promise to bring me back here before I leave?"

Nathan didn't smile. He just brushed the hair off Kelsey's neck. 

"Come on. Get in the bed. I've got a blanket in here somewhere," Nathan mumbled. 

Kelsey jumped out of the truck and into the tall grass. She climbed into the truck bed as Nathan threw a heavy blanket in with her. She spread it out as Nathan climbed in. She sat down as Nathan kneeled and crawled towards her. 

Kelsey lifted her shirt above her head and set it aside. Nathan's hands reached behind her and unclasped her bra, freeing her heavy breasts to the night air. He pressed his lips against hers, only pausing to lift his own shirt over his head. She whimpered as he pushed back against her, lowering her onto the thick blanket beneath her. 

She listened as he kicked off his shoes and worked his pants down his legs. She moaned as his dick came free and brushed against her thigh. She tried to reach down and grab his manhood, but he quickly moved her hand in order to remove her shorts and panties. He wasted no time pulling them down together and pushing throwing them to the side. 

Nathan's naked body hovered over Kelsey's as they stared at each other. For the first time all night, Nathan smiled. His eyes softened and he smiled tenderly at her. His lips descended down to her collarbone. Kelsey groaned as his mouth showered her skin with warm, wet kisses. She briefly opened her eyes and stared up at the dark, starry sky. Everything was so quiet. Everything was so peaceful. Everything always felt perfect when she was with him, under him, just like this. She felt her entire body relax as Nathan's weight pressed into her. He rolled onto his side, spooning Kelsey from behind. 

He brushed her hair off of her neck once again. His left arm worked around her neck and his hand gripped her throat, while his right hand traveled up and down the length of her body. His fingers trailed over her round hip, down her thigh and back up again. He ran his palm up her smooth stomach and underneath her right breast. His palm traced over her nipple so gently, it almost felt like a breeze tickling her flesh. Kelsey moaned loudly as her nipple stiffened against his hand.

"Oh my God, Nathan. Oh, I love you."

Nathan smiled against her shoulder and kissed it. His fingers gripped her nipple tightly, sending a shock of pleasure through her nerves. She groaned and pressed her naked ass back against his stiff erection. Nathan sighed with desire. She felt his cock jump and pulse against her as she pushed back on him. 

Nathan used his hand that was around her throat and guided her mouth back to his and they kissed deeply, Nathan's tongue penetrated her mouth possessively. Kelsey's knees instinctively began to spread. Nathan pushed his cock between the warm, wet lips of her pussy and pushed her legs closed again. He hadn't entered her, but his cock was dragging against her slit with every push and pull of their bodies. He rubbed his cock along her wetness as his tongue invaded her mouth at the same speed. 

Kelsey was starting to lose control of her senses. She wanted his tongue deeper. She wanted his cock buried inside of her. She wanted to grab him, to have him grab her. She felt an insane wave of lust building up inside of her until she just couldn't take it anymore. Kelsey reached down between her thighs and guided the thick head of his cock into her pussy. With one hard, controlled thrust, Nathan shoved his full length into her. They both cried out.

"Nathan...oh...my God. Yes!"

"Fuck," Nathan growled in her ear. 

Their bodies rolled in unison as he pushed himself into her. Kelsey pinched her eyes shut and bit her lip. Nathan grabbed her throat in his left hand, her hip in his right as he pounded into her as deeply as he could. Kelsey clawed at the blanket beneath them.

"Ahhh, ahhh! Oh f-f-fuck!" 

The quiet chirp of the crickets was quickly replaced with the soft slapping sounds of Nathan's hips against Kelsey's bare ass. Just as she felt her pussy start to tighten around him, he pulled out of her. After a gentle kiss on her neck, Nathan rolled Kelsey onto her back. 

"Mmmm. Don't stop!" she pleaded.

Nathan grinned down at her. He pressed his soft lips against hers. Kelsey's hips lifted, searching for his cock. Nathan laughed softly, then guided the head back to her entrance. She groaned as he slid into her, then paused. 

"Oh God, don't tease me, please. Just fuck me, Nathan. Please! Fuck me...fuck me...oh, fuck me," she chanted quietly against his mouth. Nathan growled and shoved himself into her. Kelsey's fingernails dug into the muscular flesh of his back and arched her body up against his.

Nathan blindly searched for her arms and pinned them above her head, pressing them into the unforgiving truck bed. He started pounding into her mercilessly. Kelsey could sense his aggression, his passion, his frustration...but for the first time, she didn't sense the love behind it. As he pounded into her, Kelsey realized that she'd been telling him all night and he hadn't once said it back. She knew why he was distancing himself, but in that moment, with him buried deep inside of her, she needed to hear it.

"I love you, Nate," she whispered between thrusts.

Nathan groaned and squeezed her wrists tighter. His speed increased.

Kelsey moaned as he sawed in and out of her faster. Her juice was spreading between them, causing him to rub against her clit in just the right way. She was so close to orgasm, but tried to fight it off until she heard the words that she needed to hear from Nathan's mouth.

"Nathan...I love you. Fuck! I love you!" 

"Fuck...Kelsey, fuck!"

"Please, Nate, tell me that you love me. Please...oh fuck...please? I need to hear you say it!"

Nathan dug his fingers into her wrists to the point of pain. Kelsey cried out as he thrust into her uncontrollably. They were all moans and cries of passion and pain and pleasure. Kelsey's body couldn't hold back anymore. 

"Ohhhhh...I do...I-I love you!" she screamed as a tortured orgasm tore through her body. Kelsey's back arched off the blanket, pushing her breasts up towards his face as her pussy squeezed down around his shaft. 

Nathan's face pressed between her breasts. He groaned as his own climax hit him suddenly. His body tensed and shook against hers. Kelsey felt his cum pulsing through his cock and into her contracting pussy. 

"Fuck. I love you, Kelsey."

They both groaned and growled with physical contentment. 

Their emotions, however, were on a different level.

Nathan's painful grip started to slowly loosen around Kelsey's wrists as they both came down from their orgasms. Nathan panted between her heaving breasts and she exhaled heavily into his hair. Nathan pulled out of her gently and collapsed on top of her, resting his face against her stomach.

After several minutes of heavy breathing, they both became quiet. The chorus of chirping crickets once again filled the air. 

Kelsey felt Nathan's hand reach down and lace into hers. He raised it to his lips and kissed it softly.

"We better get back." 

Kelsey nodded, still sensing Nathan's emotional distance. They sat up and started to dress, quietly handing each other articles of clothing. Once she was clothed, Kelsey stood up and folded the blanket. She handed it to Nathan without looking at him, then jumped over the side of the truck bed. She got in the truck and rested her head against the seat. Nathan climbed in next to her, but didn't start the truck.

Kelsey lifted her head. "What's wrong?"

"You know I love you."

Kelsey sighed. "I know. I just needed to hear it."

Nathan nodded and rested his head against the steering wheel.

"You're really going?"

Kelsey sighed. "Yeah."

Nathan didn't reply. He started his truck and drove down the bumpy dirt path, back to the gravel road. 

Kelsey scooted across the seat and sat next to Nathan. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and she rested her head against his chest. The dashboard glowed and illuminated their faces. The warm summer night air once again filled the truck. She inhaled deeply and let the scent of Nathan and the leather in his truck fill her senses. Kelsey closed her eyes and tried to freeze the moment in her mind. She knew that she would need this comforting memory in the weeks and months to come. 

All too soon, Nathan pulled up in the Bradford's driveway. He left the truck running. Kelsey slid back to her seat and glanced over at him. 

"I'll back off, Nathan. If that will make it easier for you...if that's what you need...I promise I'll back off."

Nathan closed his eyes and nodded once. "Yeah. I'm sorry, Kels."

Kelsey smiled gently and let her hand squeeze his. 

"Don't apologize. I understand. I'm here if you want to talk or anything, ok? I'm still your friend, Nathan. Nothing is going to change that. Promise me that nothing will change that."

"Nothing will change that," he nodded in agreement and forced a small, weak smile. 

"Ok. Night." 

"Night."

Kelsey took a deep breath and got out of Nathan's truck. She walked back to her parents house and slipped inside, closing the front door behind her. 

"Kelsey? That you? Where'd you go?" her Mom called.

Kelsey rolled her eyes. "Yeah, it's me. Nathan and I ran out for ice cream." 

Kelsey hated lying, but she figured that a small lie about ice cream was more appropriate than telling them that she'd just fucked him in the bed of his truck. Kelsey wearily climbed the stairs and went directly to the bathroom. 

As she showered away the sweat and the sex, she couldn't stop the tears from falling to the tiled shower floor. 

If New York was the best decision, why was it making everyone so miserable?

>>>>>

After a long night of photo editing, Kelsey finished the photos for her parents and the Lowe's. She grabbed the disc as she headed out the door for work the next morning and dropped it in the Lowe's mailbox along with a note:

"Dave and Nancy- Here are your photos. I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoyed taking them. Love you both. -Kelsey"

Kelsey got in her car and drove to work. Alison was fumbling with the lock on the back door when she pulled up. Kelsey couldn't help but giggle. Poor Alison just wasn't able to function this early in the morning. Kelsey jumped out and helped her. 

"Here, Alison, I've got it."

"Fuck! I hate this fucking door," Alison grumbled.

Kelsey threw the bolt and jerked the heavy door open, motioning for Alison to enter. 

"Thanks, Kelsey."

"No problem."

The girls clocked in and started tying on their aprons.

"You know, you're going to need to find someone else to help you out around here in the mornings," said Kelsey.

Alison's head jerked up from the computer screen.

"What do you mean?"

Kelsey took a deep breath. "I am going to accept an internship position in New York. I'll be leaving in less than a month."

Alison's mouth dropped open. "Wait-wh-wait. New York? When did this happen? What happened to your internship here?"

"This is a really good opportunity, Alison."

"Well...what about Nathan?" she blurted.

Kelsey glared at her. "What about Nathan?"

"I just always thought..."

"What? You always thought what? That we'd end up together?" Kelsey could feel her frustration boiling inside of her unexpectedly.

"Well...yeah."

Kelsey shook her head. "I can't base my decisions off of what everyone else expected my life to be, Alison. You sound like everyone else. I figured at least you would be happy for me."

Alison's face softened. "I'm sorry. Ok? I'm sorry, Kelsey. If this is what you want, then that's great. I'm just surprised. I'm sorry."

Kelsey's shoulders sagged. "I'm sorry for snapping at you. I'm snapping at everyone. I don't know why."

"Because you're stressed?"

"I guess so," Kelsey shrugged as she started the espresso machine. 

"Because maybe you don't want to leave?"

Kelsey rolled her eyes. "So much for the encouragement, Alison."

"I'm just saying, Kelsey. Just because something sounds like a great opportunity, doesn't always mean that it's the right opportunity, you know?"

Kelsey nodded. 

"It's ok to be stressed out, just make sure that the decision you're making is really worth the stress, ok?"

Kelsey walked to Alison and hugged her tightly. She felt Alison's arms wrap around her. 

Kelsey giggled as she pulled away from her friend.

"You're actually pretty wise in the morning, Alison."

"Not by choice. Only when my friend springs some kind of shit like that on me."

As the morning went on, Kelsey found her focus shifting from the work at hand, to New York. She'd have to go ahead of time to set up some kind of living arrangements and to get a feel for her new surroundings. She needed to go to Studio16 and talk to them before calling David Fisher and formally accepting the job offer, she needed to pack, she needed to...

"Um...excuse me? I'm waiting here!"

The obnoxious voice brought Kelsey back to reality in an instant. Without even looking up, she knew exactly who that voice belonged to.

Amy Buckley.

Kelsey turned to see her standing there. It wasn't even 10am and Amy was in full makeup, dressed to the nines. The girl never worked a day in her life, so Kelsey only assumed that she was so dressed up out of complete insecurity.

Kelsey sighed and tried to put on her most professional performance.

"Good morning! What can I get started for you today?" Kelsey said, too kindly.

"Cut the bullshit, Kelsey. Just get me a non-fat, caramel frappe. Non-fat. You heard that, right?" 

"Non-fat," Kelsey repeated slowly, typing into the computer screen. Alison kicked her from behind the counter as Kelsey typed the special instructions: 'Please make with whole milk.' Alison giggled and started making her order. 

"Yeah, we'll get that started for you, Amy. Anything else?"

"Did I say that I wanted anything else?" 

Kelsey cringed. "That will be $4.29." 

Amy slid a credit card through the machine and tucked it back into her designer wallet. She looked at Kelsey and waved the wallet in front of her. 

"You like this? You know who got it for me?" Amy said with a smug smile. "Nathan," she said in a sing-song voice.

Kelsey nodded. "That's nice. Here. Take your receipt."

Kelsey walked away and started cleaning up the counter as Alison made Amy's drink. Amy followed Kelsey from the other side of the bar.

"So, Bradford...rumor has it that you're leaving soon."

Kelsey's eyes shot up to Amy, not knowing how she could have possibly heard the news so quickly.

"Where did you hear that?"

"Oh...well, I was at Nathan's last night and..." she trailed off, tapping a manicured finger on the countertop.

Kelsey felt her face start to burn. 

"You were at Nathan's? Last night?"

Amy smiled and nodded. She crossed her arms under her huge chest and cocked her head to the side, clearly proud of the fact that she was making her so upset. Kelsey took a deep breath and tried her best to hide her anger.

"Well, that's wonderful. You heard right. I will be leaving soon."

"It's about time, you know. Now I can have Nathan all to myself without you trying so hard to get his attention all the time. You're really needy, you know that, Kelsey? It's actually really sad."

Kelsey felt her temper gaining momentum. "Amy, you just need to leave. You don't even know what you're talking about. You've been jealous of me since day one. Nathan and I have been best friends our entire lives. If you feel threatened by that, that's no one's fault but your own."

Alison slid the whole-fat frappe across the counter at Amy. She stood beside Kelsey as they both glared at the blonde haired goddess in front of them.

"Non-fat caramel frappe," Alison said flatly.

Amy shrugged as she grabbed her drink. 

"Doesn't matter now, does it? Nathan's mine. You and I both know that he'll come running back as soon as you aren't in his ear telling him to leave. And you? You'll be hundreds of miles away...unable to do a single thing about it." 

Amy smiled her perfect, too-white smile and made a kissy face at Kelsey as she turned to walk away. She tossed her straw wrapper on the floor behind her as she walked out the front door.

As soon as the bell stopped chiming, Alison started to frantically untie her apron. 

"Hold my fucking apron, I'm going to go kick her ass, Kelsey."

Kelsey chuckled as a tear slid down her cheek. 

"Don't bother. Amy's not worth it."

"But look how she made you feel!"

"It's not Amy, Alison. It's that I'm afraid she's right. I'm scared that if I'm gone, Nathan will go back to her! Nathan has blinders on when it comes to her, and I know he can do better. It's not the idea of him being with someone that bothers me...it's the idea of him being with someone like that, that bothers me!"

"Tell Nathan what she did just now!"

Kelsey shook her head. "I've told him time and time again about her. He's a grown man. He can make his own decisions."

Alison grabbed Kelsey by the elbow and pulled her into the back room and sat her down on a stack of milk crates.

"Kelsey...I know I'm not the only one who has told you this, so just listen, ok? You and Nathan? You're perfect for each other. Absolutely perfect. He loves you. It's not the kind of artificial love that you feel the need to make a big show of, either. It's the real thing. It's the way you look at each other. The way he stares at you from across the room. The way he smiles at you while you're talking."

Kelsey felt the tears start streaming down her face again.

"Damn it, Kelsey! Stop being so stubborn!"

Kelsey couldn't hide it from anyone anymore. 

"I love him, Alison. What the hell do I do? Do I stay? Do I go?"

"I can't answer that, but you have to remember one thing. Real love doesn't come along every single day. Yours has been in front of you for 23 years."

Kelsey sighed and wiped her eyes on the backs of her hands. She took a deep breath and stood up. Alison grabbed her shoulders.

"Get your ass out there and finish your shift, then go find Nathan and figure this out!"

>>>>>

Kelsey left work and was sitting at a stoplight when her cell phone chimed in her purse. It was Nancy Lowe. Kelsey smiled and answered.

"Hello?"

"Kelsey! I'm going through these pictures! Honey, they're perfect. The best you've ever taken."

"Oh, I'm so glad you like them! It's not me. It's impossible to take a bad picture of your family, Nancy."

"I wish that were true!" 

The women laughed.

"Kelsey, I'm sorry if we didn't seem more supportive about your decision to go to New York. You know it's just because Dave and I love you so much, right? We will just be sad to see you go, sweetie."

Kelsey smiled. "I know, Nancy. Please don't apologize. It was a surprise to everyone, even myself."

"Well, everyone is going to be at our house for dinner tonight. Are you working?"

"No, I just got off work."

"Ok, well, Nate will be there."

Kelsey inhaled. "I'm not sure if tonight will work for me, Nancy. I've got a lot of stuff going on."

"Well, if you change your mind, about anything," she added, "We'll all be there. Stop by if you can."

"Ok, thanks."

"Thanks again for the pictures, sweetie. Love you!"

"Love you."

Kelsey ended the call and dropped her phone into her purse. She thought about how hard it would be not just to leave her own parents, but to leave Dave and Nancy and the boys, as well. 

She drove through town aimlessly. She drove past apartment buildings and small houses for rent, thinking about what it would be like to stay here, in the town she was born and raised in. New York had it's appeal, but so did small town life. She had a million memories of these streets, of these buildings. Every last part of Kelsey felt as though it was being pulled in a different direction.




Meant To Be Ch. 04



She drove and drove until she glanced at the clock. It was nearly 5pm. She drove back downtown and parked in front of Studio16. She shut off her car and looked at the building. Even after an entire day of soul searching, Kelsey still felt sick about what she was about to do. She shook her head, squared her shoulders and took a deep breath. She got out of her car and walked to the office door. She exhaled and walked inside.

"Kelsey Bradford! I didn't expect to see you today! Getting excited to start your internship?"

"Actually, that's why I'm here."

>>>>>

Kelsey shut the door of her car and let out a long, shaky breath. Her heart was still pounding. She glanced in the rearview mirror. Her eyes were red. Her cheeks were flushed. With trembling hands, she put the key in the ignition and started the engine. The decision had been made, and there was only one person that she needed to talk to. 

Kelsey knew that Nathan was going to be at his parents house for dinner. She pulled out into traffic and started to drive the short distance home. On the way, she passed Nathan's apartment. His truck was still parked outside. Kelsey glanced in her mirrors before pulling quickly into his apartment complex. She parked next to his truck and got out of her car. She walked so quickly that she felt like she was floating. The only thing she could see was Nathan's front door. She grabbed the knob and walked in without knocking. Nathan's roommate, Stephan, was sitting on the couch. 

"What's up, Kelsey?"

Kelsey's eyes scanned the apartment. She saw Nathan down the hall, leaning on the kitchen counter, reading a piece of mail. He was dressed and ready to go to his parents house. Kelsey walked towards him without even acknowledging Stephan. Nathan must have seen her out of the corner of his eye, because he did a double take when he saw her rushing down the short hallway.

"Kelsey...what ar-"

Kelsey didn't even wait for him to finish. She ran up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Her shirt lifted slightly and Nathan's hands instinctively wrapped around her warm waist. She pressed into him, pushing herself into his muscular body. Her hands dropped to his neck, then down to his chest before she finally pulled her swollen lips off of his. She opened her eyes and stared up at his. 

After a day of emotional turmoil and a week of constant stress, it was nice to jump into the arms of the one person that always made everything feel better. She rested her forehead against his briefly before pulling away from him all together.

Nathan fell back onto a barstool. 

"Um...hi," he laughed. "What are you doing here?" Nathan nodded over his shoulder. Kelsey turned around and watched as Stephan grabbed his keys and left, locking the door behind him. She turned back to Nathan. 

"I need to talk to you."

"Alright." 

Kelsey cleared her throat. "I had a run-in with Amy this morning."

Nathan groaned. "Fuck. What happened?"

"Nothing. She just came in for coffee and started talking shit. Nothing new. She said she was with you last night." Kelsey held up her hands when Nathan started to interrupt her. "I'm not mad. We aren't exclusive, but I'd be lying if I said that it didn't hurt to hear that, though. You had sex with me, then Amy right after?"

Nathan laughed loudly. Kelsey stared at him, confused.

"Kelsey, I didn't fuck Amy. She came over here trying to hook up, but I turned her down. She got pissed and went to bed with one of Stephan's friends."

Kelsey sighed from relief. "Ok, but how did she know that I was going to move?"

Nathan shrugged. "I don't know. They came in after they were done. Stephan and I were talking about it. Amy must have overheard us."

Kelsey nodded. 

Nathan's eyes went from the floor, then rapidly back up to Kelsey's. He squinted at her.

"Wait. Wait a second...did you just say that you 'were' going to move?" Nathan's eyes searched hers desperately. 

Kelsey tried, but couldn't contain the small grin that started to spread across her face. She nodded slowly.

Nathan stood up and grabbed her face. 

"What? What are you saying? You're not leaving?" He couldn't hide the excitement in his voice.

Kelsey's shoulders sagged. "I can't. Nathan...I can't. The longer I thought about it, the sicker I felt. Not just about leaving you, but leaving all of my plans and dreams behind. I know that it's a chance that doesn't come along often, but you know when your gut just tells you that you shouldn't do something? That's what I've felt all week long. This just isn't meant to be. When something is meant to be, you know it."

Nathan's thumbs traced her jaw line.

"Nathan, you and me? This?" She waved her finger back and forth between them. "We're meant to be," Kelsey said with certainty. "I know it. I've tried to fight it, I've tried to tell myself that it's just what everyone else thinks, but it's not. I love you. I love you so much and just the thought of being away from you for that long just doesn't feel right to me."

Nathan leaned down and kissed Kelsey softly. His lips lingered on hers for a moment before he pulled away from her and sat back down on the barstool. He pulled a stool out for her. Kelsey sat down and Nathan's hands went to her knees, running his fingers across her smooth skin. 

"Kels, this is crazy. I can't ask you to give this up for me."

"You're not asking me to do anything. This is my decision. My choice," Kelsey put her hand on her chest. "Mine. And for the record? I'm not giving anything up for you. I made this decision for us." 

Nathan smiled. His dimples betrayed him as they pierced his cheeks. He leaned his face down and kissed her knees. Kelsey ran her hand along the short hair on the back of his head. 

"God. You're sure? I'm going to feel so bad if you end up regretting this, Kelsey."

"I'm not going to regret anything. If it was right, I would have known it. The very first thing that came to my mind when I found out about New York was you...how I didn't want to leave you. Then, everything else just complicated it. My family, your family, living arrangements, being alone all the time, a new city, giving up a good internship here, friends," Kelsey shrugged. "It just isn't right for me. Not now. I just left Studio16 and talked with my boss. Everything is still lined up to start in August. I'm not going anywhere."

Nathan's smile faded. He stood up between Kelsey's knees and leaned into her, stopping just inches away from her face. 

"And you're sure this is what you want?"

"I'm positive."

"Promise?"

"I promise, Nathan."

"Kelsey?"

"Yeah?"

"Be my girlfriend. Please? I have been waiting my entire life to ask you that."

A huge smile broke across Kelsey's face. She bit her lip and nodded.

Nathan's hands wrapped around her neck as he pulled her in for another kiss. She felt his fingers tangle in her hair, gripping it firmly, holding her head in place. She lifted her hands and wrapped them around his strong forearms. Their lips locked together and sealed the status of their new relationship. 

"Bed?" he whispered against her lips. 

"Mmmm," she moaned and nodded in response.

Nathan pulled her off the barstool and lead her to his bedroom. Before they got there, Nathan pressed Kelsey up against the wall. He leaned in and kissed her neck, letting his thick lips drag against her. She moaned as her skin erupted in goosebumps. He kissed her collarbone and the tops of her breasts before reaching down and pulling her shirt off. He threw it on the floor and pushed her back. His hands traveled down to the button on her short, white shorts. He unfastened the button and let them slide down her toned thighs. They fell to the floor and Nathan's hands immediately grabbed her hips. He hooked his fingers into her panties and worked them down to her thighs. Using his foot, Nathan pushed her feet apart, spreading her legs. Kelsey whimpered as his lips continued to devour her neck and chest. He grabbed her hands and pinned them above her head with his left hand. His right hand held her chin as he planted a soft, wet kiss on her lips.

"I love you," he said calmly.

"I love you, too," she panted. 

She smiled to herself, thinking about the night before when he was so guarded with his words, trying so hard not to let his love for her influence her decisions. She pushed her face forward, silently asking for another kiss. He smiled and obliged. She gasped as his teeth sunk into her lip, gently pulling on it and sending a wave of excitement through her.

Nathan's hand went from her chin to her breasts. His fingers traced along her skin where her breast and her bra met. Kelsey shivered against him. His thick fingers hooked into the soft cups of her bra, pulling them down and forcing her breasts upward. Nathan groaned and dipped his mouth down to suck on each of her thick, erect nipples, causing Kelsey to cry out. 

"Ahhh! Oh, yeah," she whispered as Nathan latched his mouth around her right breast. 

Keeping her hands secured above her head, he used his free hand to slide along the smooth surface of her stomach. Kelsey's muscles tensed and flexed under his hand. She felt him inching closer and closer to her wet pussy. Nathan planted his foot on the inside of Kelsey's, keeping her feet apart. Her panties were stretched between her spread knees and she could feel the wetness coating her sex. 

By the time Nathan's fingers made their way between her legs, Kelsey was shaking with need. He pressed against her slit, rubbing slowly back and forth. His lips deserted her nipple and went directly for her mouth. He smiled against her as he felt her wetness covering his fingers. 

"Fuck. You're so wet, Kelsey," Nathan growled.

"Mmm-hmm. Take me to bed," she pleaded. 

Nathan pulled his face away from hers and looked down between their bodies. Kelsey's hips were pushed out and he watched as his fingers rubbed against her slippery pussy. His breathing became ragged when his thumb found her clit. Kelsey's knees instinctively tried to close, but his foot kept her legs apart as he circled her most sensitive spot. 

"Oh...oh God, Nathan!" 

Kelsey's pelvis started to rock against his hand as they worked her closer to orgasm. 

"I'm cl-close, Nate," she whined. 

Nathan let go of her wrists and grabbed her hip with his free hand. Kelsey clutched desperately at the wall as his expert fingers worked her clit. Without warning, Nathan let go of her hip and shoved two fingers deep inside of her, pumping them in and out. 

Kelsey's body felt like it was on fire. One of his hands was rubbing her clit, the other fucking her hole. She couldn't hold out anymore. Her hands grabbed Nathan's broad, flexing shoulders as her climax washed over her. Her body surged with pleasure, causing her hips to buck against his hands. Her nails dug into his arms, until the orgasm started to subside. Kelsey's body relaxed against the wall. His lips pressed against her throat as he lifted her and carried her to his bedroom, locking the door behind him. 

Nathan laid her down gently on his bed. Her body twitched and shuddered gently as she watched him remove his clothing. Once he was naked, he took a brief second just to stare at Kelsey. Her eyes impulsively dropped down to his throbbing erection. Kelsey got up on her knees and crawled to the edge of the bed. She pulled on Nathan's hand, guiding him to her waiting mouth. She licked her lips and smiled up at him. As she started to kiss along his shaft, she felt his hands glide along her back. He unhooked her bra and threw it to the floor. His hands smoothed her hair and brushed against her soft skin. He moaned quietly as her lips worshiped his aching cock. 

"I love you," Kelsey said. The head of his cock bounced against her wet lips with each word. 

Nathan growled and gripped the sides of her face. He guided her mouth down onto him. Kelsey's tongue massaged the underside of his head. She felt the drops of pre-cum leaking from him, so her tongue worked to lick them up. She loved hearing his strangled moans of pleasure as she worked the first few, thick inches of him in her mouth, but she knew he wanted more. 

Kelsey's eyes traveled up to his. She stared at him as she lowered her mouth down his cock, inch by pulsing inch. He filled her mouth and began to fill her throat. Kelsey angled her head so she could fit the last couple inches in. Nathan was panting as her lips pressed against his pelvis. Kelsey tried to swallow, forcing even more pressure around the head of Nathan's buried cock. His hands tightened around her face.

"Oh fuck...oh fuck, you're good. You're so fucking good, Kels." 

Kelsey pulled back a little and started to glide her mouth back and forth along the length of Nathan's dick, making love to it with her lips and tongue. She could feel the saliva pooling in her mouth, dripping down the sides of her lips. She lifted her hands from the bed and pressed them against Nathan's thrusting hips. She worked her mouth along him steadily, letting her tongue rub along the bottom of his shaft. 

After several minutes, Nathan's hands dropped down and started to massage Kelsey's breasts. He groaned as his palms rubbed against her stiff nipples. His fingers attached to each and he started to pinch them, applying a little more pressure with each bob of Kelsey's head. She took the hint and started to work up and down his cock faster. His grip on her nipples tightened. Kelsey went faster and deeper. Nathan started to twist her nipples, sending sharp waves of pleasure through her body, straight to her clenching pussy. She moaned around his cock. 

Nathan groaned as he pushed Kelsey back onto the bed. She shook with desire as Nathan crawled on top of her. Her legs parted automatically. Her warm, wet pussy was desperate to be filled. He kissed up her stomach and against the column of her throat. Kelsey felt his wet, swollen cock jerking and pushing against her. She lifted her hips in search of it as he breathed heavily against her neck. 

Kelsey reached down between their trembling bodies and found his dick. She closed her eyes and smiled as she guided him to her entrance.

While this wasn't going to be the first time they'd had sex, Kelsey still couldn't help but feel the newness and excitement bubbling up within her. This was going to be the first time that she and Nathan had sex as a couple. She couldn't wait to be filled by him any longer. Kelsey rolled her head to the side and whispered against his ear.

"I love you so much. Please fuck me. Fuck your girlfriend hard."

Nathan moaned and shoved his entire cock into her with one long, sharp thrust. They both cried out from the sudden sensations. Nathan steadied himself over her body and got up on his knees. He grabbed onto her hips as he pushed into her, watching as her breasts bounced in response to his thrusts. Kelsey arched her back as she felt her pussy grab and clench at Nathan's dick. She clawed at the bed sheets as the hot pressure started to build within her again. 

The sight of Nathan's flexing body, the sound of his deep moans, the smell of their sweat and the sex, the taste of Nathan's cock on her lips...everything was sending Kelsey into a sensation overload. She wasn't sure how long she could last before her climax was going to hit. She felt the muscles deep in her pussy start to contract. She sat up and wrapped an arm around Nathan's neck. He grabbed her ass in both hands and helped her bounce up and down on his cock. Her sensitive nipples were dragging against his chest, her clit rubbing against his pelvis. Kelsey dropped her head back, her brown hair tumbling down her back.

"Ohhh, fuck, Naaaate!" she cried.

"That's it, Kelsey...come on. Cum for me, beautiful. Cum on my dick."

Even through the haze of her orgasm, she still realized that it was the first time Nathan had ever called her anything other than her name. Just hearing him call her 'beautiful' was enough to send an extra shiver down her spine. She grabbed onto him as her climax shook her to her core.

"Oh God!" She couldn't help but scream out against his neck. 

Nathan's hands dug into her ass as he lowered her back to the bed. He pushed her into the mattress and started fucking her relentlessly. Her pussy gripped at him, desperately trying to milk his cock. She saw the strain in his face, the look of absolute lust. His body collapsed onto hers and with two sharp, final thrusts, he started to moan as his own orgasm consumed him. Kelsey felt his dick jerking and spurting thick jets of cum into her. Her body relaxed into the bed as she felt his body starting come down from his climax. 

After several seconds, Nathan fell onto the bed beside her. They were both panting and breathless. They sighed and moaned from pleasure and from exhaustion. Kelsey felt Nathan roll his head towards her. She looked over at him. He was smiling.

"What?" Kelsey giggled.

"I'm so happy right now."

Kelsey felt her heart swell. Those 5 words were all the confirmation that Kelsey needed to know that she had made the right decision. She rolled her body towards him and kissed his lips tenderly. 

"Me too."

She nuzzled into his body and he wrapped his arm around her. She sighed contently as his fingers dragged up and down her spine. Her fingers rubbed against his stomach. After a long silence, Kelsey reluctantly sat up. She leaned over Nathan and reached into his pants that were crumpled on the floor. She grabbed his cell phone. She showed Nathan the clock. Almost 7pm and a missed call from his Mom. Nathan groaned. 

"We better get over there," he mumbled. Nathan slapped Kelsey's ass playfully as they got up and started to get dressed. Kelsey unlocked his door and peaked into the hall to make sure that none of Nathan's roommates had come home. It was safe, so Kelsey went out into the hallway to collect the rest of her clothing. She got dressed quickly and went to the bathroom to freshen up. When she walked back out, she saw Nathan leaning against the kitchen counter waiting for her. 

"Ready?" 

Kelsey smiled. "Yep. I'll follow you there?" 

"Just ride with me." 

"But then my car would be here."

"That's the point. You'll have to come back with me to get it," Nathan said with an ornery grin. 

Kelsey laughed. "Ok. Let me grab my purse out of my car, though."

They walked outside and Kelsey got her purse. She checked her phone. She had a missed call from her Mom, too. Kelsey tucked it back into her bag and climbed into Nathan's truck.

Nathan started the engine and pulled out of the lot and into traffic. He reached across the seat and grabbed Kelsey's hand as they drove the short distance to his parents house. 

"Did you call that David Fisher guy yet?" Nathan asked.

Kelsey shook her head. "No. I'm going to in the morning."

"And you're sur-"

"Nathan, I promise. I'm sure that this is what I want, ok? Please don't feel guilty. I want to be here. This is where I belong." 

Kelsey moved across the seat and pressed her lips against Nathan's throat. She kissed below his ear and down the pulsing vein in his neck. She heard him moan quietly. She smiled against his warm skin. 

"Eat fast so we can go back to my place," Nathan laughed. 

Kelsey laughed as she moved back into her seat. As they pulled onto their childhood street, Kelsey relaxed and looked out the window. She smiled as she watched a little boy chasing a little girl down the sidewalk. It instantly took her back to the years that she spent with Nathan growing up. She sat up and looked over at him.

A lump formed in Kelsey's throat as she stared at Nathan's profile. It was simple...so simple. She knew everything about him and he knew everything there was to know about her. They knew each others quirks and habits, their likes and dislikes. She knew what he was afraid of, and he knew what made her laugh until she cried. They could tease each other and argue, yell and curse. They could talk about everything, or sit quietly and say nothing at all. Over the years, between family barbeques and vacations, between relationships and breakups, years of laughter and even tears, Kelsey and Nathan had no idea that their entire lives had been leading up to this very moment. This one small, seemingly insignificant moment in time. 




Meant To Be Ch. 04



Nathan pulled up to his parents house and parked in the driveway. He smiled at Kelsey and they got out of the truck. They could hear everyone on the deck, so they walked around the house and to the gate. Nathan opened it for her and Kelsey grabbed his hand. 

"What are you doing? I thought you wanted to keep this quiet for awhile," Nathan asked, startled by her sudden public display of affection.

Kelsey shook her head. 

"If you love someone, why hide it?" she shrugged.

"Holy shit, our families are going to freak out right now if we walk in there like this."

Kelsey laughed and nodded. "You ready for that?"

"I've been ready for a really long time, Kelsey."

Kelsey leaned up on her toes and pressed her smiling mouth against his. 

"Alright. Here we go," Kelsey said as they walked through the gate, hand in hand. Nathan laced his fingers though hers and kissed her knuckles as they walked into the backyard. It took a moment for everyone to realize that they'd arrived. As Kelsey and Nathan walked towards the deck, Kelsey glanced up at Nathan. All she saw was the blinding love that they shared. She squeezed his hand and felt her heart surge as she realized that she had just started a journey with the man that had made her happy every day for her whole life. Kelsey was certain that the rest of their lives would be no different. She had no question that she'd made the right decision.

The way she saw it, there was no point in trying to fight what your heart tells you is right. 

After all, some things in life are just meant to be.



Meant To Be Ch. 04



"Daniel's going to be here on Friday. He wants to meet us for dinner."

Nick's voice was calm, conversational. I looked up from my plate and saw that he was watching me with interest.

"Us? Or, you and me?" I asked.

I studied his eyes as he dissected my meaning. I suspected he hadn't told my uncle about us. To be fair, I hadn't told my family either. Partly because any mention of my romantic life led to awkward and vague queries from my parents about my sexual activity, and partly because I expected there would be a negative reaction to our age difference that I didn't want to hear when I was so happy.

"You and me, I suppose," Nick said quietly.

We ate in silence for a few minutes before I forced myself to speak.

"Should we tell him about us?"

He met my eyes with a rueful smile.

"I don't know, pet."

I nodded.

In the end we decided not to say anything and not to act differently. I knew this meant there wouldn't be obvious physical contact, but it wasn't a secret that we spent a lot of time together. I was dreading the meal a little; Uncle Daniel and my father are brothers but had never been close. Growing up we'd see their family once, maybe twice, a year. He was a large, loud man with a sharp sense of humor. As a child, he'd driven me to tears on several occasions before I became old enough to understand sarcasm. He didn't scare me anymore, but being around him was akin to attempting to be social with a strict teacher I'd never liked all that much. If Nick was anxious about the dinner, he hid it well. I knew he and my uncle were close and that above all, Nick respected him.

The meal started out well; the men caught up and talked about work, and I was able to listen and not contribute without it being odd. Uncle Daniel switched to Scotch halfway through the meal and it seemed to affect him quickly. He began asking me questions about my job and graduate school plans, shooting them out at me one after another as if he had them loaded in a machine gun.

"I'm starting my first graduate class this summer," I told him, trying not to sound exasperated when his questions became repetitive.

"Why just one class?" he demanded.

"Because I'm allowed one free class each semester, as an employee," I explained. "And I don't want to overload myself with working full-time and taking too many credits."

"Why are you going to continue to work full-time?" he asked with incredulity. "I thought the plan was to work for a year and then enroll as a full-time student."

"No," I said, confused. "That was never my plan. I can't afford to live in the city just living off financial aid, even if I worked part-time."

"It's going to take you forever to finish!" my uncle exclaimed.

I swallowed a sigh. "It'll take me longer, yes. But it won't be that long."

"And she won't have loans to pay back when she's done," Nick interjected.

I flashed him a grateful look before my uncle commanded my attention again.

"Why are you even staying in this city? It's so expensive. You'd be better off -"

"Because I love it here," I interrupted. "And I don't want to sound rude, Uncle Dan, but why are you getting so upset about it? So what if it takes me longer to get my degree?"

"I just want to make sure you're making good choices, Cassie," he said angrily.

I leaned back in my chair, not letting myself speak until I calmed down.

"She is making good choices," Nick said calmly.

Uncle Daniel gave a snort of derision and I rolled my eyes. I turned to Nick, who was sitting next to me in the booth.

"Can you let me out? I'm going to the restroom."

"Of course, pet," he said, standing up.

I felt his hand on the small of my back for just a moment before I walked away. I didn't linger in the bathroom, not wanting my uncle to think he had upset me. When I returned, he was staring at his Scotch while Nick looked almost amused. I was relieved to see that our dinner dishes had been cleared. Nick got up to let me in, and rested his hand on my back again as we sat. I didn't look at him, trying to hide my reaction to his touch.

"Cassie, I'm sorry if I upset you," Uncle Daniel said sullenly.

"Thanks," I said quietly.

We said goodbye to him outside the restaurant and walked to Nick's. He took my hand, stroking my palm with his thumb.

"Is he normally like that with you?" Nick asked me.

"I think that's the longest conversation he and I have ever had," I remarked, chuckling.

"I'm sorry he acted that way."

I shrugged. "What did you say to him when I was in the bathroom, anyway?"

"I reminded him of all the stories my parents told me about him at age twenty-two," Nick said with a laugh. "And told him that you're a smart, mature young woman."

"Thanks," I said gratefully.

I smiled fondly at him as he brought my hand to his lips and kissed my fingers.

We were woken up incredibly early the next morning when Nick's cell phone rang. I groaned and covered my head with a pillow.

"It's Daniel," Nick told me, lifting the pillow up.

I looked at him in surprise.

"Hi, where are you? I thought your flight was this morning," Nick said when he answered.

Even though it wasn't on speaker, I could hear my uncle's booming voice clearly.

"I'm downstairs, I stopped here on the way to the airport. Can I come up?"

Nick looked at me in alarm; I'm sure my expression matched his perfectly.

"Uh, sure thing," Nick said hesitantly.

"Be up in a few."

"What is he doing here?" I asked.

Nick was already out of bed and pulling a on a pair of jeans. He slipped on a t-shirt, looking uneasy. He ran a hand through his hair, not meeting my eye.

"I don't know, love. Can you -"

"I'll stay in here," I assured him.

He looked relieved and nodded before leaving the room. By the time I got dressed my uncle was in the apartment and I froze in place when I heard what he was saying.

"Nick, just what is going on with you and my niece?"

I clasped my hands tightly, holding my breath.

"What do you mean?" I heard Nick ask.

"Don't play dumb, boy."

I felt my eyes widen at his condescending tone. Creeping to the door, I slowly opened it a crack.

"You know what I'm talking about, Nick."

"Dan -"

"It's one thing that she was following you around like a puppy dog at the wedding..."

I flushed, both embarrassed and angry.

"But I saw the way you were looking at her last night. Now answer my question. What is going on with you two?"

"Look -"

"I mean, she's my niece, Nicholas. For Christ's sake!"

I caught a glimpse of my uncle as he paced across the living room. How is Nick keeping his cool?

"Not to mention she's practically still a child! And if you're taking advantage of her -"

"Daniel!"

I jumped at Nick's shout. There was a short silence.

"Daniel," Nick repeated calmly. "First of all, she was not following me around at any point. And she's not a child, she's a grown woman."

I smiled despite my nerves.

"So what exactly are you saying?" Uncle Daniel hissed.

I squeezed my eyes shut, gripping the door tightly.

"Yes, we are involved...romantically."

There was another tense pause.

"Nicholas, if you weren't like a brother to me I would punch you in the fucking face right now," my uncle said, sounding like he was clenching his jaw.

"No one's been taken advantage of, Daniel." Nick sounded like his control over his temper was slipping. "We're both adults. I - I care about her."

I blinked, feeling a stinging in my eyes.

"You're old enough to be her father!" Uncle Daniel shouted. "Not to mention, you're practically family. God, it's almost incestuous!"

I clapped a hand over my mouth, feeling sick.

"That's enough!" Nick shouted back. "You and I have been like family, yes. But I didn't meet Cassandra until she was out of school. I'm not some - predator. Christ, Daniel."

I heard the sound of cushion springs as if Uncle Daniel had thrown himself on the couch. There was another long pause.

"I'm sorry for that," my uncle mumbled.

"As you should be," Nick said coldly.

"How - how could you do it, Nick?" Uncle Daniel said plaintively.

"It's nothing I did to you," Nick told him. "It's just - what happened."

There was another agonizing silence before I heard footsteps and closed the door as quietly as I could. I sat on the floor with my back against the bed, hugging my knees. It felt like hours before Nick returned. His eyebrows jumped in surprise momentarily at the sight of me, then he dropped to the floor next to me.

"I suppose you heard," he said quietly.

"Yeah," I muttered. "I'm sorry he spoke that way to you, he was totally out of line."

"Well," Nick said, shrugging.

We sat despondently for several minutes before Nick shook his head.

"It's early yet, love. Let's get some more sleep."

He held out a hand to help me up and I wrapped my arms around him. I slipped my hands under his t-shirt to pull it off his head, pausing briefly when I saw the sadness in his eyes. He stood numbly as I undid his jeans.

"Come to bed," I murmured, tugging on his arm.

He sat on the edge of the bed, his shoulders slouched. Drawing me to stand between his legs, he slowly worked my tank top off and then slid my pants down my legs. He ran his hands over my body, following with his eyes as if trying to memorize every part of me. When he looked at me, there was tenderness in his eyes as well as sadness. I bit my lip, my heart clenching as I saw his pain. No longer angry at my uncle's words on my own behalf, I forced myself to squash the resentment that he had hurt Nick so badly.

"What can I do?" I whispered, stroking his cheeks.

He studied me silently for a long moment before covering my hands with his own.

"Let me feel you in my arms, pet," he said in a shaky voice. "Let me make love to you."

I pressed my lips to his, not wanting him to see the tears filling my eyes. He pulled me onto his lap, scooting back on the bed and returning my kiss. He crossed his legs under me, positioning my legs to wrap around him. Taking my hands, he kissed each wrist, then each palm, then my fingers before placing them on his shoulders. Staring at me, he lifted me until I was slowly lowered onto him, locking his arms around me. He rocked into me gently, never breaking eye contact. My climax was quiet, not explosive, but still powerful due to the intensity of his gaze, the intimacy of us holding each other closely. As I finished he let himself go, burying his head in my neck, crying out softly.

We tumbled to our sides, our limbs still tangled, and fell into a restless sleep.

I woke in the middle of a disturbing dream where Nick and I were lost in some kind of maze, calling for each other but not able to find one another. I looked around, confused, and saw that I was alone in bed. Slipping on a tank top and panties, I padded down the hall and saw Nick sitting on the loveseat facing the windows, hunched over. He must have heard me because he didn't jump when I stopped behind the couch and placed my hands on his shoulders.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly.

I moved around the couch when he didn't respond. He raised his head and I stopped short at the redness around his eyes. He was looking at me with despair and regret. My stomach twisted into a knot and I involuntarily took a step back.

"Cassandra," he said in a tight voice.

I began shaking my head and took another step back.

"Pet, I'm sorry, love -"

"No. Don't," I said angrily.

He pressed his lips together, his features crumpling in pain. He held out a hand to me and after hesitating, I took it and sat down next to him.

"Cassandra, we can't go on," he said, his voice choked.

"What?" I whispered, staring at our hands. "Why are you saying this?"

"I just - it's just not going to work."

"Why?" I cried angrily. "Because of Daniel? Fuck him and what he thinks."

Nick flinched. "I think he was right," he said hollowly.

I wrenched my hand from his and began pacing the floor.

"He's not right," I said through gritted teeth. "It doesn't matter what he thinks."

I stopped pacing when Nick stood, his expression masked.

"It matters what I think. And I think it's best if we end things now, before..." He trailed off, looking at me helplessly.

I stared at him, my shock overpowering my sadness.

"Why?" I demanded, surprised at how steady my voice sounded. "Have your feelings for me changed?"

"No," Nick said slowly. "But -"

"Are you no longer attracted to me? Do you not find me funny or smart or sexy like you always said you have?" I asked angrily.

His head jerked back. "I -"

"Because if none of those things have changed, then I don't understand why it's best," I snapped.

"Pet, surely you've expected that this would...end?" he said plaintively.

I stiffened, my hands forming into fists at my sides.

"No, I have not expected that this would end," I mimicked. "Why would I?" I sighed in frustration, my voice lowering morosely. "Everything has been perfect. I love you."

I sucked in a sharp breath; up to this point I'd been too scared to put this label on my feelings for Nick, had barely let my mind entertain the thought. Now, muttering them under my breath, the words felt both foreign and incredibly right. If Nick heard them, he didn't visibly react.

"Why would that have to end?" I whispered.

He walked over to me but didn't touch me.

"It just does, Cassandra. It's the right thing to do. I'm sorry."

"It's not the right thing to do," I said, fighting to keep control. "It's a shitty thing to do. And for a stupid reason," I added, glaring at him. "And you know what else? It's cowardly. Either you've been playing me for a fool all this time and never felt about me the way you've made it seem, or you were being honest but you're just too scared to admit it to people who know us...for whatever stupid reason you've come up with to think it's for the best. Well, it's not. It's cowardly. And never in a million years would I have thought of you as a coward."

Nick staggered back a step, looking as though I'd slapped him. I twisted my hands together, pinching my fingers in an attempt to keep myself from crying. Part of me wanted to throw my arms around him, apologize, and refuse to break up. The other part of me was selfishly glad I had hurt him. Overpowering everything else was the pain in my chest of my heart shattering into pieces.

"Well," Nick said after a long silence. "If that's the way you feel then it's probably good this is over."

I watched in horror as he turned on his heel and walked out of the room.

---

I stared at my reflection in disgust, making a face at myself before turning away. I had impulsively chopped four inches off my hair so it was now a bob ending just below my chin. Gwen had colored it for me, trying to achieve Thea's beautiful auburn shade, but it just turned out looking garish. I hated the cut and the color.

Of course, I hate most things these days.

It had been two weeks since Nick had ended things with us, and my days had consisted of walking around in a haze of pain and sadness. And disbelief that I would really never see him again. It didn't seem possible, after seeing him almost daily since moving to New York. He had become so much more than my lover; he was the person I hadn't held anything back from, the person I was comfortable enough to share everything with. And now he was just...gone.

I knew people were worried about me. My uncle had told my parents about Nick, and after avoiding their calls and emails for over a week, I finally spoke to them. I cut off any lectures by telling them it was over and I didn't want to discuss it. Penny called almost daily for a week, continually asking about Nick and about how I was handling it, only stopping when I blew up at her. Thea was more reserved, as was her nature. She reached out to let me know she was there to listen if I was needed her, but I never did.

Even my cousin Kate, who I normally only communicated with over email, called, ostensibly to share the news of her pregnancy, but she also brought up her father's outburst and offered her sympathies. None of them mentioned it any more, but I could feel their concern through the phone, read it in the subtext of their emails. I couldn't bear to discuss it with anyone.

Gwen let me wallow for a few more weeks, then made it her mission to help me get over Nick. She dragged me out of bed and forced me to go out. She talked me into a membership at her gym so I could join her yoga classes. My new haircut and color was her idea, and she repeatedly told me how great it looked even though she knew I didn't agree.

She was the one who pointed Jason out to me. He was a newcomer to our yoga class, clearly out of his element but with a confidence that showed his inexperience didn't bother him. She and Matt had broken up that spring and, assuming she was interested in Jason, I indulged her seeking him out. She introduced herself and then me, chatting with him before and after each class while I hovered nearby without really participating.

Yoga had become vital to my mental health and it felt almost too personal a place to make friends. I wasn't meditative by nature; it took me several months to not only grow comfortable with the poses but with the absolute quiet. Even as the poses became easier, it was a long time before I was able to stop my mind from racing and feel somewhat centered. I still had to work at it, but the occasional moments of clarity I'd managed to achieve kept me coming back.

One day after class she suggested getting coffee, and the three of us sat together for over an hour talking. When Jason invited us out for coffee after the next class, I was surprised when Gwen said she had an appointment; as far as I knew she had no plans. Jason quickly nodded with a grin and turned to me.

"Looks like it's just you and me, Cassie," he said with a hint of suggestion.

I hesitated, looking at his broad smile. I could see why Gwen found him attractive; he was tall and lean with light brown hair and dazzling hazel eyes. I caught a glimpse of Gwen over his shoulder and saw her giving me an excited smile as she looked from me to Jason pointedly. I blinked, suddenly aware that I'd been set up. My stomach lurched and I automatically pressed a hand over my middle, feeling nauseated and dizzy.

"Uh - I'm actually not feeling all that great," I mumbled, my cheeks hot. "Maybe another time."

Jason's gaze darkened momentarily before clearing into concern. He nodded and told us he would see us in the next class. I rushed out of the gym to the street, leaning against the building and taking large breaths.

"Cass," Gwen said worriedly. "Are you okay?"

I just shook my head, shutting my eyes.

"Come on," she said, putting an arm around me. "Let's go home."

It thankfully didn't take me long to calm down. As we entered our building, I turned to Gwen with an attempt at a smile.

"What about your plans?" I asked pointedly.

She blushed, not meeting my eyes as she unlocked the door.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly. "I can tell he likes you, I was just trying to help."

I gave her a thin smile. "I thought you liked him," I ventured.

She snorted. "No way, he's too much of a jock for me. Now, sit. I'll make lunch."

"I'm fine," I assured her. "I just - I don't know if I'm ready, Gwen."

She was silent as she rummaged around in the refrigerator. Bringing the food to the table, she began assembling sandwiches, speaking without looking at me.

"You know, it doesn't need to be a serious relationship with a capital R," she said conversationally. "It's just coffee. You can date, just to see how it goes."

"I know," I muttered. "I just don't feel interested in that either."

"Well, it hasn't been that long," she said briskly, nodding.




Meant To Be Ch. 04



"I don't think that's it," I whispered, my heart dropping. "It still feels like he and I are supposed to be together. I don't know how to explain it," I added morosely.

I felt her sympathetic gaze as she handed me a plate and was grateful she didn't say anything else.

That night I dreamt of Nick, a confusing dream consisting of us tangled in bed together interspersed with various scenes of losing each other in a crowd or being separated by some unidentifiable force. I woke up feeling the familiar sad ache, but also anger. I barely spoke to anyone at work, stalking through my tasks as if the paperwork was the one that wronged me. Without making a conscious decision to do so, I found myself on the subway to Nick's after leaving work. My anger had dulled to a steady frustration as I walked up to his building.

George, one of the doormen, smiled at me.

"Cassandra," he said.

I couldn't help a smile. He and the other doorman, Eli, always used my full name despite my telling them repeatedly they could call me Cassie. Nick had introduced us using my full name and that's what they insisted on.

"How are you, George?" I asked.

"Good, good," he replied. "It's been a while," he added cautiously.

I nodded, apprehension beginning to overpower my other emotions.

"Mr. Hawthorne isn't home," he said.

I nodded again. "Do you think - would it be okay if I waited inside for him?"

"Of course," George said without hesitation, opening the door for me. "Go on up."

"Thanks," I said nervously.

I contemplated waiting in the lobby, but didn't want to see Nick for the first time in such a public place. I settled myself cross-legged on the floor next to his apartment door, glancing at my watch every few seconds. He seemed later than usual and it became difficult to force myself to keep waiting. I sprung to my feet when the elevator doors opened. I heard voices and panicked.

What if he's not alone? I gripped my purse tightly, whipping my head around as if looking for an escape route. Oh God, what if he has a woman with him?

I was berating myself for not considering this possibility when Nick stepped into the hallway, smiling and nodding politely to someone inside. I let out a large breath, realizing he had been chatting with one of the other tenants. He turned and my knees almost gave out. I hadn't forgotten one thing about what he looked like, but seeing him in person was no comparison to my memories. It was as if he radiated heat and electricity from the other end of the hall. I pressed my back against the wall for support.

He froze when he saw me. I could see him straighten his shoulders and clear his features.

"Cassandra," he said quietly as he approached. "What -" He stopped and cleared his throat. "This is a surprise," he finally said.

I nodded, pressing my lips together.

"Uh," he said, glancing up and down the hallway. "Would you care to come in?"

He unlocked the door and stood aside for me to enter. I hovered near the door.

"Can I get you something to drink?" he asked, brushing past me and heading toward the kitchen.

"That's okay," I said, my voice wavering.

He stopped and turned to me, his face guarded. He didn't ask me what I was doing there but I could see the question in his eyes.

"I need to know what happened," I whispered. "I need to know why."

His gaze faltered and he looked at the floor uncomfortably. When he looked up, he had once again cleared his expression and looked stoic.

"Would you like to sit?" he asked, gesturing to the couch.

I couldn't even look at the piece of furniture where we had spent so many happy hours. I shook my head. He let out a small sigh, nodding sadly.

"I don't know how to explain it," he said slowly.

"Try," I snapped.

He looked startled, finally meeting my eyes directly.

"It - it was the right thing to do," he said simply. "It was never going to work out, pet."

I flinched at the endearment and he looked apologetic.

"That's not a reason," I said harshly. "I don't even think that you really believe that."

His jaw clenched. I stared at him until he met my eyes again, taking a step closer to study them carefully. I watched his gaze travel over my face, my hair, down my body. When he looked at me again, I saw the mask had slipped briefly. In that moment I saw his desire for me, and knew his feelings hadn't changed. He blinked and the guarded expression reappeared, but it was too late; I had seen it.

"We were happy," I said softly, taking another step toward him. "There wasn't anything wrong with us being happy...being together."

I let my purse fall from my arm, dangling the strap on two fingers. My free hand twitched and I was just starting to lift it to touch him when he took a large step back. My head jerked back, my eyes widening. He shook his head almost imperceptibly, looking at me with regret.

"I'm sorry," he said in a low voice. "I - it just can't happen."

He took another step back and I felt my cheeks flush with anger. Straightening my back, I flung my purse over my shoulder and turned to the door.

"You're wrong," I said over my shoulder as I left.

I didn't remember anything about the journey home, but the next thing I knew I was throwing myself onto my bed, waiting for the tears to emerge. They never did. I was still sad, still missed him with a painful ache and longing, but it had mutated into a kind of bitter outrage that squashed the potential for crying. The result was me going through each day with tenacity as if everything and everyone I came across was something to be vanquished.

Eventually my mood tapered and leveled off enough that my friends no longer looked at me warily. The ache was still present, the bitterness still bubbling under the surface, but I became agreeable again. There were moments of ease where I would laugh involuntarily or find myself enjoying life but it still felt like an act to me.

It was a few weeks before Jason asked Gwen and I to coffee again after yoga, but when he did I didn't hesitate to accept, sending a pointed look in Gwen's direction. She made an excuse, and Jason and I walked to the coffee shop.

We found a table and I sat while Jason ordered our drinks. He refused my offer to pay for mine, so I waited with nervous anticipation as this began to feel more and more like a date. Jason came back to the table with our coffees and let out a laugh.

"I figured you'd changed your mind about me, but you still look petrified," he teased.

"What? I am not," I protested, wrapping my hands around my mug so I would have something to do.

He sipped his coffee, watching me with an amused expression. I rolled my eyes and couldn't help grinning.

"Before - I thought you and Gwen..." I trailed off and shrugged.

He raised his eyebrows. "Me and Gwen?" He chuckled. "No."

"She's gorgeous," I said, incredulous and defensive of my friend.

"She is," he agreed conversationally. "But she's not the reason I started taking that stupid yoga class."

I blinked, my eyes widening. I looked down at my coffee, feeling my cheeks get warm. I looked up when he laughed again.

"You're very pretty when you're blushing," he commented.

I gave an embarrassed laugh. "You're quite the smooth talker," I retorted.

"Well, being subtle wasn't working with you," he replied simply.

I smiled, staring at my coffee, feeling the flush spread across my cheeks. Maybe subtlety hadn't worked, but his overt flirtations apparently were. When he asked me to dinner, I agreed.

Jason was probably as different from Nick as a person could be, which in the beginning seemed a good thing. He was overly flattering and attentive, thoughtful in the way he would leave me notes or make sure he kept my favorite food or drinks at his apartment. But he was also insecure and sensitive. He was jealous of my friendship with Ian, referring to him as my 'work boyfriend.' It was funny at first - so funny that Ian and I adopted the term. However, soon Jason's voice took on a bitter tone when he said it. He began calling more often on days we didn't see each other, in the morning and evening, and sometimes during work as well. I thought it was sweet that he missed me, but we never really talked; he only seemed interested in where I was or who I was with at the time.

Once my summer class started, his comments about my being too busy for him went from light teasing to pointed barbs. When we were together, he was either sullen and withdrawn or funny and sweet. I tried to focus on his good qualities and ignore the rest, but in retrospect, it was reaching the point where it couldn't be avoided.

It was halfway through summer term and I was hunched over the coffee table looking at my planner. Gwen came home and found me repeatedly scribbling and erasing things on my schedule, then chewing on the pencil eraser with my brow furrowed. She leaned over my shoulder and saw where I had written and erased Jason? several times.

"You're scheduling in Jason," she commented.

"I know," I said with a harsh laugh. "He's not crazy about the last minute plans."

"You're seeing him tonight, aren't you?"

I nodded. "But I know he's going to want to set up a next date tonight, so I need to know when I can make that work."

"Cass."

I looked up at her serious tone.

"What?" I asked.

"Don't you think it's a little - I don't know, wrong to consider your boyfriend a task on your to do list?"

"I don't do it because he's something I just need to cross off doing," I said. "I don't know - don't a lot of busy New Yorkers schedule time with their significant others?" I added, only slightly joking.

"Maybe." Gwen looked at my calendar skeptically. "It just doesn't seem like you're putting him on the schedule because you're dying to see him. Your face looks like you're trying to fit in time for a dentist appointment."

I laughed. Leaning back, I rubbed my eyes and sighed.

"He hasn't been particularly understanding about my class schedule," I admitted. That's an understatement.

"Yeah, I've noticed," Gwen said dryly.

I nodded, not surprised. "He bitches about it a lot," I admitted. "And he calls several times a day when we're not together. It's as if he doesn't believe that I am where I say I'm going to be or something."

"Really," she stated, looking concerned. "Cass, that's not okay."

"Yeah," I said. "Shit," I added, throwing my pencil across the room.

Gwen looked at me questioningly and I shrugged.

"Now that I've said it out loud, I can't ignore it. Now I have to a conversation about it."

She hugged me.

"I'm sorry. Who knew he'd turn out to be such a girl?"

I laughed, not feeling much humor. I watched her walk out of the room, wishing I handled dating the way she did. She was straightforward about it and had great instincts. Gwen would be the first to admit she'd never been in love, but it didn't stop her from becoming close emotionally while somehow managing to keep her head about her.

She's probably seen this coming with Jason for weeks, I realized.

Jason had asked me over for dinner and I arrived at his place with reticence, not knowing how to introduce the subject. I was quieter than usual and he commented on it. I sighed and put my silverware down, looking at him.

"I think we should talk," I began.

He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. I hesitated, but he just looked at me expectantly so I continued.

"I don't know...I don't think this is working out," I stammered.

His eyes narrowed but he remained silent.

"With my schedule and how busy I am - and how much you seem to hate it...it seems like neither of us is very happy," I said awkwardly.

"I just hate having to practically beg you to spend time with me," he said coldly. "It's like you don't care if you see me at all."

"That's not true," I said, irritated at his dramatics. "I've made as much time for you as I can. It's not like I can invent more hours in the day. It just seems like it's never enough."

"I just want to spend more time with you," he said sullenly.

He looked so sad that I felt guilty for being annoyed.

"I know, but my schedule is what it is," I told him. "I can't change that. It just feels like we're not enjoying ourselves because of this issue...so maybe it's best if we just...end it?"

"I don't want to end it," he said decisively. He leaned forward and took one of my hands. "I think I'm falling in love with you."

I gaped at him. "Jason, we barely know each other."

"Well, I can't help how I feel," he snapped, letting go of my hand. "Look, I can be more understanding. I won't be such a pain in the ass from now on."

"You're not a pain," I said, stifling a sigh. "But - you also don't seem very happy. So why push it, you know?"

"I don't want this to end," he repeated. "Let's keep trying," he implored.

"Okay," I said reluctantly after a long pause.

He smiled and stood, drawing me into his arms. He began kissing my neck, his hands roaming my back while I stood there stiffly.

"Jason, I - I'm just not in the right frame of mind," I murmured, trying to sound gentle. "I think I should just go home."

He lifted his head and looked at me in amusement.

"I'm not buying it," he teased. "You're always in the mood."

At any other time I would have agreed with him. But his assessment only fueled my irritation.

"Well, believe it or not, it does happen," I tried to say lightly. "It's nothing personal -"

"Come on, Cass," he cajoled.

His hands worked their way under my shirt and he pressed me against him. I started to speak but his mouth covered mine. He was kissing me so fiercely it was several moments before I could push him away.

"Not tonight," I said firmly. "Okay?"

I took a step back and he grabbed my wrist. His eyes were blank, his face expressionless. The blood chilled in my veins.

"Jason -" I said shakily.

"Stay with me," he said, his voice low and threatening.

"I - I have to go home," I replied, hating how my voice came out in a whimper.

I took another step backward toward the door and he was against me in two steps, pressing me against the wall with his body. I felt a sharp pain jolt up my arm and realized he'd twisted my wrist behind my back.

"Please let me go," I said, my eyes wide with fear.

"No. I want you to stay," he said, nuzzling my cheek, his hands gripping me so tightly my fingers were starting to go numb.

Panic washed over me. Jason was much, much stronger than I was. I heard a sob burst out of my mouth and started gasping for air, beginning to hyperventilate. I was just trying to instruct my knee to meet his groin when he raised both my arms over my head, by some stroke of luck hitting the shelf next to the door. One of the screws came loose and the shelf tilted, spilling books and a large jar of pennies onto the floor, which distracted him enough to drop my hands.

I shoved him away from me and bolted out the door, ignoring him as he called my name. I kept running until I got to the street, ducking into the first bar that I saw. If he followed me, at least I would be in a crowded place when he found me. I reached for my purse, cursing when I realized I'd left it at Jason's. Luckily I kept my phone in my pocket. The only person I knew who lived relatively close by was Ian.

"Cassie, what's up?" Ian said cheerfully when he picked up.

"Ian -" I stopped, still breathing heavily.

"What's wrong?" Ian was suddenly concerned. "Where are you?"

"Uh -" I looked around. "I have no idea."

Walking over the bar as Ian frantically asked me questions, I picked up a menu.

"I'm at Mullanes," I interrupted him. "Do you know it?"

"I think so - what happened?" he asked anxiously.

"I just broke up with Jason. He - he -" I gulped.

"Mother fucker," Ian muttered. "I'm coming there right now."

"Okay," I said weakly.

I flipped the menu over and gave him the address, slumping onto a stool at the bar. When Ian arrived he stalked over to me and wrapped his arms around me. I was too numb to return the hug, instead sitting there still holding my phone.

"Let's get you home," Ian said quietly.

"What happened?" he asked when we were on the subway.

I shook my head, trying to keep the tears at bay.

"Cass, did he - did he hurt you?" Ian said, barely controlling his anger.

"No," I whispered. "He accidentally knocked a shelf over and that distracted him...otherwise, I don't know - I don't - know what - what he -" I stopped and buried my face in my hands.

"Christ," Ian muttered, pulling my head to his chest and hugging me.

---

I was slumped on my bed, staring into the distance. It was a month into the fall semester and I had registered for a second class instead of taking just one like I had originally planned, needing to fill up my time and occupy my brain. It worked, but two classes in addition to working full time left me worn out, though I suspected it wasn't my schedule that caused my exhaustion. I hadn't been sleeping well for months, the combination of lustful dreams interspersed with nightmarish scenes of losing Nick had become constant since we broke up.

I don't know how long I sat there but at some point a movement caught my eye, and I looked up to see Gwen walking down the hall, crumpling a piece of paper. She jumped in surprise when she saw me.

"I didn't know you were home," she said, stuffing the paper in her pocket.

I glanced at the piece of paper curiously and when I looked at her I saw she was avoiding my eyes. I sighed, realizing what it was.

"Another one?" I asked flatly.

She nodded briskly. "Don't think about it," she said firmly.

Fuck, I thought. I sighed again and fell back onto my bed.

Within a week of our breakup, Jason began calling me. At first he'd leave sorrowful messages apologizing and asking to see me. Then he began calling from unrecognizable phone numbers so I would pick up. I made the mistake of speaking to him the first time, trying to convince him it was over and asking him to leave me alone. After that I just hung up once I heard his voice. He called me at work a few times, for once making me glad I didn't have a direct line; the receptionist was able to screen his calls and never transferred him.

I saw him at the gym, where he would stare coldly at me from across the room. He showed up in my neighborhood occasionally and Ian told me he'd see him around the university building where we worked as if he was waiting for me. It eventually made me so nervous that I avoided going anywhere alone unless it was absolutely necessary. Lately he'd taken to leaving me notes at the front desk of my apartment building. The first was filled with such vitriol that Gwen intercepted the following ones for me and shredded them. I knew now by her expression that she had picked up yet another one.

"Don't think about it," Gwen repeated, sitting next to me and giving me a hug.

"I'll try," I said in a tight voice.

I didn't bother to explain how, while upsetting, Jason's behavior wasn't what filled my mind. I hadn't really mourned him, my thoughts instead turned to Nick and how wonderfully he'd treated me. It was inevitable I compared him to Nick. How could I avoid it, when our personalities and desires had meshed so perfectly?

Using Nick as a benchmark was a mistake as it caused me to grieve him all over again. But it was all I had to prove to myself that there was the possibility of having that again. The whole relationship had been almost effortless; he filled my senses and stimulated me physically, emotionally, intellectually. Everything about us had fit so perfectly together, except for the glaring - though significant only to him - age difference. At least this time the mourning process was different than before - still painful, but now it was bittersweet rather than a hopeless, endless ache.




Meant To Be Ch. 04



"Should we try coloring your hair again?"

Gwen's voice penetrated my thoughts and I gave myself a mental shake.

"What? Oh. No, I don't think so," I said wryly.

I had begun growing out my hair as soon as I'd cut it and it was now longer than it had ever been. I discovered the weight of my thick hair at this length loosened my ringlets into softer, larger curls, which I loved. I didn't want to mess it up with another failed dye job.

Gwen smirked. "You're coming out with us tonight."

"I am?" I mumbled.

"Yes. We're going to an opening tonight - that professor I told you about? It's his show," Gwen said.

"Oh. Right," I said.

I had been spending more time with her classmates than my own recently. They had all been raving about a visiting professor they'd had the previous year who had an opening coming up. I had forgotten all about it until now. I allowed Gwen to shove me into the bathroom and sat numbly while she did my makeup and picked out an outfit for me.

Miles was tall - well over six feet - with broad shoulders and long reddish hair he kept tied in a neat ponytail. He had stunning dark blue eyes and full lips that always seemed to turn up in a somewhat mysterious smile. When Gwen introduced us, I suddenly remembered her gushing about one of her professors so much that I teased her about having a crush on him. She had never mentioned his name but now there was no need.

"Miles, this is my friend Cassie," Gwen said with a bright smile.

He took my hand, holding it for a few moments longer than necessary. He stared at me intently with his brow wrinkled slightly, giving me that enigmatic smile. I shifted my eyes to Gwen and then back to him, which seemed to snap him out of his trance.

"God, I'm sorry," he said, dropping my hand with a chuckle. "You just look so familiar to me. Were you in one of my classes?"

"Oh, no," I said, laughing. "I can't draw a stick figure."

He continued studying me before shaking his head.

"I can't place it, but I am positive we've met before," he said.

"Must have been a past life," I joked.

After chatting for a few minutes, I drifted off to browse the gallery. We didn't see Miles again until we said goodbye before leaving. He touched my arm lightly as the others walked away.

"Cassie, can we have coffee sometime?" he asked.

"Oh," I said in surprise. "Sure."

We exchanged numbers and I caught up with my friends. Gwen was excited by the news, not believing me when I said it wasn't a date. I couldn't explain why, but I was sure he wasn't interested in me. I couldn't understand what he'd want to see me again - it's not like I knew a lot about art - so I was confused by the invitation.

Miles and I met for coffee or dinner several times over the next few weeks. He never made any overtures, which confirmed my instinct that he wasn't interested in me romantically. Each time we saw each other, he wondered at my familiarity and tried to determine when we might have met before. I was amused by his fixation with it, but didn't give it much thought.

One weekend he asked me to accompany him at the art opening of a friend of his at a small gallery in Brooklyn. The turnout was huge and, unnerved by the crowd, I positioned myself at the open bar, quickly making friends with the bartender. I drank much more than I normally did. By the time Miles was ready to leave, I had to lean heavily on him in order to maintain some semblance of walking. He suggested I crash at his place, which was nearby, and I agreed.

By this time I knew Miles well enough and trusted him, knowing he wasn't interested in me. He was a perfect gentleman, only promising that once I was sober, he would be teasing me about this behavior. I laughed drunkenly and tumbled into his apartment.

"Oh, my God," he said, laughing and pulling me to my feet. "Come on, you lush."

He led me to his room and told me to wait while he changed the sheets. I wobbled on my feet, taking off my coat and shoes. I think I forgot where I was, because I just kept undressing until I was in my panties and the camisole I'd worn under my dress. He turned after making the bed and looked at me in shock.

"Jesus Christ, Cassie," he said in amusement.

I glanced down at myself before looking up again, trying to focus on him. I shrugged and lost my balance. He caught me and sat me down on the bed, grinning.

"Okay, the bathroom's right there if you feel like you're going to be sick," he told me, pointing.

I nodded, then dropped to my back on the bed with a sigh. Miles laughingly moved me to the top of the bed, drawing the covers over me. I grabbed his hand.

"Stay," I mumbled.

"What?" he asked, his eyes wide.

"Stay here," I said. "Just until I fall asleep?" I pleaded.

"Oh. Sure," he said comfortingly.

I woke in the morning curled up in the fetal position, clutching a pillow against my chest. I felt disgusting. I was clammy, could feel the makeup I hadn't washed off caked around my eyes, and could tell my hair was curling more than usual thanks to a restless night of sleep. Fortunately my head and stomach didn't seem to be suffering any ill effects of my alcohol intake. I lay there with my eyes closed for as long as I could, stretching my body and rubbing my face. When I finally looked around, I saw Miles sitting at the foot of the bed, watching me with an amused expression, that cryptic smile playing on his lips.

"Uh, hi," I said lamely, propping myself up on my elbows.

"Morning," he said cheerily.

I looked around awkwardly.

"I'm really sorry about getting so drunk," I muttered.

"Oh, please, don't apologize. It was immensely entertaining," he told me.

I snickered. "Did I say anything interesting?"

"Oh, yes," he confirmed. "But I won't be telling you what you said now. That'll come later when you've recovered and think I've forgotten about this."

"Great," I said sarcastically.

He laughed, suddenly holding up a hand when I started to get up.

"Cassie, would you let me draw you?"

"Would I - what?" I asked dumbly.

"Well, when you stripped down to almost nothing before getting into bed," he said with a smirk. "I got a good look at your body."

I fell onto my back and covered my face with a pillow. I don't know if it was the alcohol still buzzing through my system or because of how comfortable I was with Miles, but I wasn't embarrassed about undressing. I did feel uncomfortable at his request to draw me, though.

"I'd love to have you pose for me," Miles was saying.

"You don't mean now, right?" I asked, my voice muffled by the pillow.

He plucked the pillow off my head, laughing.

"You do look pretty right now, even hungover," he said mischievously. "But I'm guessing you're not in the best shape to stand still for posing."

"Oh, really?" I said haughtily. "I'll have you know I am a spring chicken, only twenty-two years old. Twenty-two-year-olds do not get hangovers. We bounce right back."

"In that case, let's go for a morning run," he said brightly.

I groaned and rolled over. "Shut up."

He laughed again and poked me in the arm.

"Go take a shower - I left towels in the bathroom for you. Then I'll take you home."

Miles insisted on making sure I got home safely even though it was broad daylight and I was mostly sober. He wore me down until I agreed to pose for him, by that point wanting to fall into bed so badly that I would have agreed to almost anything. He called me a few days later to set up a time to get together, asking me to meet him Friday after work at a studio he rented in Soho.

I walked in nervously and took in the large, open space covered in paint. There were a few easels set up around the room, areas set up with backdrops, and canvases covering almost every available space. I stopped near a small wooden bench in front of a simple white sheet.

"Is this where you want me to sit?" I asked.

Miles looked at me in puzzlement for a moment before his expression cleared.

"Oh! Sorry, I hadn't really planned to draw you today," he explained.

"Oh," I said. "Then...what?" I asked.

"Here," he said, moving a tall stool for me to sit on next to a large table.

I sat and watched him moving around, looking through stacks of drawings before pulling out a portfolio from a shelf under the table.

"Remember when I couldn't figure out how I knew you?" he asked absently, flipping through the book.

"You mean, the thing you mentioned every single time I saw you? Yeah, I vaguely recall," I teased.

He flashed me a grin.

"Well, I remembered. Are you thirsty?" he said suddenly.

I giggled and nodded. By now I was used to the way Miles jumped from subject to subject, but it still entertained me. He got two water bottles from a small refrigerator as he continued speaking.

"It was in a drawing I saw - I taught a class at the New School over the summer, a live modeling class and became friendly with one of the students."

He handed me the bottle of water and I looked at him, not following his train of thought.

"What was in a drawing you saw?" I asked, confused.

"It's your hair," Miles went on as if he hadn't heard me. "I wasn't used to seeing it shorter and more curly. The other night when you stayed over - when I woke up and saw you sleeping, your hair was curlier. I watched you for a bit before you woke up and that was when I remembered where I'd seen you before. The drawing."

"What was in the drawing?" I repeated.

Miles finally sat next to me, pulling the portfolio in front of us.

"You," he said simply, pulling out a sheet of paper and placing it in front of me.



Meant to Be Ch. 05



Vicki was finding that being in love was a double edge sword. She was never happier than knowing that Aaron loved her too. Every time they were together it made her fall deeper in love. Because of this their time was precious. They made every moment count, as hours seemed like minutes. When he was unable to get free, every minute was like an hour as she longed for his return. Knowing that he might never return was something she tried to keep from her thoughts.

She also discovered that it was easier to give her heart to Aaron than it was to give her body. It wasn't that she was embarrassed of it. No, that wasn't the problem. Of course she knew it wasn't perfect. She wouldn't have minded if her breasts were a little bigger but overall she knew men found her attractive. No that wasn't the problem. No she was afraid that she would disappoint Aaron.

When she married Robin she was a virgin, completely unsure of the act of lovemaking. She was open and willingly to learn and expected him to teach her. Most of all to be patient with her. In the beginning of the marriage, Robin was but as the months went on he seemed to change. Perhaps he grew tired of being patient and expected more of her. She tried but the harder she tried, the more times ended in disappointment. She blamed herself and Robin did nothing to ease her guilt. They continued to make love but the occasions grew less and less.

Now when she was with Aaron, her body responded in ways she never experienced. When he left, it took a while for her to calm down. The last time she ran her hands over her body, touching herself, imagining that his hands, his mouth, were there. 

She was sure that Aaron would be different but still there was that doubt. What if it was her and it drove him away? Either way the time was fast approaching.

Aaron told her that he was due a three-day pass soon and he wanted to go to London. He asked her to go with him. Her first reaction was to say no but she quickly changed her mind. Yes, she said, not concerned about what others would say.

Aaron tried to make it clear that he didn't expect anything but she knew that he wanted to take their love to that next level. He wasn't going to pressure her into any thing she didn't want to do.

He knocked on her door early that morning.

"Ready to go?" he asked as she came to door.

How could she tell him she had been ready for two days? She gave him a quick kiss. "Ready."

She kissed her mother on the cheek and headed for train station.

They had their own compartment on the train and as soon as they were out of sight, Aaron kissed her. A hard, deep, passionate kiss that Vicki's mouth yielded to. It was one she longed for.

"Aaron," she said, "Slow down. We have three days."

"And three nights. It doesn't seem long enough."

"There is one question I have been itching to ask you," he said.

Vicki tensed, hoping it wasn't that question. "Go ahead."

"Why does everyone in town treat you and mother with such politeness? Almost like you were titled?

Vicki laughed, "It's a long story but we have time. Besides I know so much about you and you never pried about me."

"I figured you would tell in time."

"My father was in a family owned business that did quite well before, during, and after the Great War. He met mother just before he went to France and they married in 1916. They had a son, Harold, my brother, soon after that. He died from the flu in 1919."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," Aaron said.

"I was born in 1920, perhaps as a replacement. Whatever, I guess you could say my parents spoiled me. Maybe they were over protective. We traveled in all the right circles, met all the right people. Then in 1930, the business went under. Father sold it and our house for what he could get. We returned to Duckworth to live in my mother's family home, the one we live in now."

"Go on." Aaron wanted to hear more.

"It didn't take Father long to use what connections he had left. He ran for Parliament and won. He was more than a backbencher. Soon he was in the know with Baldwin and Chamberlain. Through it all, I still got to go to the right parties. That is where I met Robin, my husband."

"That explains some things but..."Aaron urged her to continue.

"My father was very well liked by the people he represented. He did all he could to help, rich or poor, old or young. When he died in '39, it was the biggest funeral ever in Duckworth. The people still respect him and so treat us that way."

"Well, I guess I'm with someone who is pretty special. I better be carefully."

Vicki looped her arm through his and pulled herself close. "Yes, you should but not too careful." She kissed him and then rested her head on his shoulder.

Upon reaching London, they took the underground over to Oxford Circus. They emerged from it and looked around. Vicki took him by the hand and said, "Come on, follow me. I know my way around here."

She took him to Piccadilly Circus, then down to Pall Mall. Then she took him to see 10 Downing Street, Scotland Yard and, of course, the House of Parliament. "Let's go in," she said.

Aaron looked around, taking in the history. It was just like he imagined it would be. All the time at Princeton, studying English history and literature seemed to come alive. 

"I don't think anyone will be here today. On those days the place is alive with noise and commotion. Father brought me here a few times and I sat in the Commons' gallery. I was there when they debated Munich."

"Lucky girl," Aaron said, looking around and soaking it all in.

Leaving Parliament, the two hailed a cab and rode over to Buckingham Palace. They rode through a bombed area with some blocks completely leveled. It was not a pretty sigh. Now there was a new threat to London, the V-1, the buzz bomb.

The cabbie turned around and looked at Aaron. "Thanks, Yank, for all you're doing. I hope you're paying back Jerry in spades."

Aaron didn't reply. He suddenly realized how nice his war was up in the sky. He didn't get to see his results up close. They drove by Buckingham Palace where the driver pointed out the bomb damage and then dropped them at their hotel. It was much later than they thought.

"Let's get our rooms and then go grab dinner."

Aaron grabbed their bags and headed in. "Wait here," he said to Vicki and headed to the desk.

He returned in a few minutes. "All set, Room 511. I hope you don't mind but I took the liberty of registering as Mr. and Mrs. Aaron Williams. Less questions that way."

Vicki smiled. "Lead the way, Mr. Williams!"

They took the lift as the busboy led the way. Aaron thanked him, gave him a tip and set him on his way. 

"What do you think?"

The room was great. It was spacious and right in the center was a big double bed. You couldn't avoid it. Vicki's heart skipped a beat and she said nothing.

"Well?" Aaron said brushing by her. "Let's go eat. I'm starving."

"Yes, yes," she mumbled. "By all means."

"Some guys told me about a good restaurant just around the corner. They have venison. Ever have it?"

Vicki shook her head. Her mind was on that big bed.

It turned out that the restaurant didn't have venison. It really didn't have much of a choice. There was fish, chicken liver, some kind of hamburger loaf and a vegetable plate. It really hit home with Aaron what the food conditions really were.

After dinner, Aaron sensed the Vicki didn't want to hurry back to hotel. She didn't say anything but she seemed nervous, uncomfortable. He suggested they could find a pub and get a few drinks.

That was easier said than done. The entire city was blacked out and it was pitch black. They began to walk and by luck found a Bobbie. They asked directions and he told them there was one right around the corner. Even then it wasn't easy, until some people came out the pub door.

The place was packed with GIs and their girls. Aaron turned to Vicki and was about to suggest they leave when as voice called out over the noise, "Hey, Williams, Aaron Williams!"

A big, strapping Major pushed his way towards them. "Why, Aaron Williams, you old son of a gun!" The major was Chet Morgan, a classmate from Princeton and a linemate on the hockey team. Aaron introduced Vicki to him and Morgan invited them over to their table. There were seated officers from the 101st Airborne and their dates.

"Gentlemen, I would like you meet Aaron Williams, one of the original 3 Musketeers and his lovely lady." They invited them to sit and have a few drinks with them. Chet regaled the group in stories about their days at Princeton. Aaron said very little as much of what Chet said was embarrassing to him. He just thought Chet laid it on a little thick.

After a few rounds, Vicki whispered to Aaron that she would like to leave. All evening she worried about returning to their hotel room but now, after a few drinks, she decided she wouldn't worry any more. It was time.

They said their good-byes and as they left, Morgan stood up and shook Aaron's hand. As he gripped it, he said, "You take carry of yourself. When the war ends, we'll meet here for drinks. Vicki, you take care of him and remind him. You know, he is a good man."

Vicki stood in front of the bathroom mirror and looked herself over. She had purchased a long pink satin nightgown just for this moment. Now the moment was here. When she bought it, she was sure it was perfect. Now it seemed to fit like a glove and she worried it was all wrong. "Stop it!" she silently yelled at herself. "You can't stay in here all night." She took a deep breath and opened the door.

Aaron was across the room. He had removed his uniform and draped it over the back of the chair. He was thinking about tonight. Was he forcing Vicki into something she didn't want to do? He was sure she loved him but for some reason she was hesitant to make love. Yet each time they were together, it seemed she wanted to. He loved her too much to force himself on her. He definitely wanted to but he could wait until she was ready. He resigned himself to sleeping on the couch. He heard the bathroom door open.

Vicki stood there; the light from the bathroom silhouetted her. It seemed to make her gown almost transparent, outlining her legs through it. Aaron stood and stared, dropping his pants to the floor.

For a moment no one moved or spoke then Aaron walked towards her. Placing his hands on her hips, he could feel her trembling.

"Are you cold?" he asked. 

Vicki shook her head causing her hair to reflect the light behind her.

Aaron leaned forward and kissed her. Deeply, passionately. Their tongues searched each other out. They bit, nibbled their lips. Their kisses became more frantic. Their hands roamed over the other's body. They could feel each other's heat grow.

Vicki pushed him away, "Stop!" she said breathlessly. Aaron looked confused.

"I want this to be right." With that she took him by the hand and took him to the bed. Letting go, she moved back towards the bathroom.

Aaron understood. "Please, leave it on."

She paused. "Aaron" Vicki said quietly.

"But I want to see you. I need to see you."

She sighed. The soft light filled the room. The moment she dreaded was now. 

She walked towards the bed. She stopped and stood a few feet from him. She smiled, reached her arms behind her neck, and undid the halter's clasp. Her gown dropped to her feet and she stepped out of it. 

"Oh my God," Aaron said softly, "You are beautiful". He kissed her. She kissed him back, hard. He began to kiss her neck, her shoulder. Vicki softly moaned as she pulled off his undershirt. She wanted to feel him, caress him, and love him. Her hands slid to his short and she let them drop. She grabbed his erect cock. Oh God, she wanted him. Aaron turned and gently laid her down.

Aaron wanted her too. Right now but he fought the urge. He waited a long time for this moment, a moment he thought would never come.

His hands found her breasts. They felt soft but full. When he pinched her nipple, she arched her back, craving more. He placed his mouth on the other one. He sucked it hard then playfully nibbled on it. Vicki placed her hand on his making him squeeze her breast harder.

"It feels soooo good!" she thought as her hips began to move. Already her body wanted more. Something it hadn't had and Aaron was providing it.

She began moaning, louder and louder, as the feeling grew stronger. Her brain was on overload. She kept repeating, "Oh God, Oh God." She could hear herself but it sounded like someone else. Someone she never knew existed. She grabbed his head, forcing him to take more in his mouth. 

Aaron leaned back and reached for a condom that he had placed on the table. He rolled it over his cock. It appeared huge, larger than it ever had been. The head was swollen and angry purplish. He was hard as a rock. He placed his cock at Vicki's opening and slowly began to enter her. She was so wet he slid in easily. He realized though that she was very tight and suddenly he feared he would hurt her.

"Are you alright?"

It had been a long time since she had made love. The only man she ever known was Robin and his cock didn't feel like this. Aaron's felt huge and filled her up completely. 

"Oh God," she moaned. "Go slowly, my love."

Aaron needed no urging. He moved his cock slowly into her. Gently he moved deeper into her. Vicki grabbed at the bed covers, tearing them from the bed.

She pulled her legs up and wrapped them around Aaron's waist. She never felt as filled as when his cock went deeper. 

Aaron was growling as he approached his orgasm. The head of his cock felt like it was going to explode. He pounded Vicki harder, deeper. She moved her hips in time with his. Her hands clutched, needing his back.

Her orgasm hit her like a runaway train. It literally exploded on her. She seemed to lose control of her body, her mind. She dug her hands into his back and her legs flew wide. She screamed as she saw bright lights.

At the same time Aaron came. His entire body shook as he shot into her. She clenched around his cock and milked it. A loud "Aaaah" came from his mouth. He couldn't hold himself up and he collapsed on her, spent.

Vicki lay under Aaron holding him tight. She softly whimpered as she came down to earth. She had no idea how long her orgasm lasted as she lost track of everything but the feeling. Her body trembled and spasmed. She could feel Aaron's cock slip out of her. She was suddenly cold. Aaron reached for a blanket and pulled it over them. Before they fell into exhausted sleep, Vicki nestled into his arms. She gave a contented sigh. It was here she was going to stay, safe and warm. 



Meant to Be Ch. 05



Chapter 5: Wet Dreams

That night Jensen and Jared caught a plane to Vancouver as they had to shoot some scenes of the show the following day. Jensen was having a hard time concentrating on work and was glad when the day was over. It was almost 11pm when he arrived at his place in Vancouver. He knew he'd have a hard week ahead, really long days on the set, but he brushed it off his mind, took a hot shower and went to bed. 

There he is again, inside the elevator. He has his back against the wall and his legs apart to help him keep his balance. The girl has been thrown into his side of the elevator and is now in his arms. The elevator shakes one more time and he spreads his legs farther apart to keep his balance. They are now at the same eye level. She is standing between his legs, her hands on his shoulders, her lips slightly parted and her eyes squeezed shut. He can feel her trembling in fear and panting for air. Their lips are less than an inch apart and their bodies intertwined. He has both arms wrapped around her, one holding her tightly around her waist and the other one up her back. He softly strokes her hair and confirms what he thought, it feels like silk, and wonders about the rest of her: her pearly skin, her red lips, the color of her eyes...he didn't have the chance to see them, so he has no idea what color they are... 

He looks at her hungrily. She has the face of an angel...full red lips, rosy cheeks. Their chests are pressed together and he can see her breasts rising and falling as her breath keeps increasing rapidly. He perceives her fragrance, some fruity scent...apple? And that makes him want her even more and wonder if she tastes like apple as well. The elevator shakes again and the spaghetti straps of her top and bra slide down exposing her pearly shoulder. His hand reaches for it and his fingers begin stroking her skin, that soft silky skin of hers, just like he imagined it. Her eyes are open now and their color is brown, same as her hair, just like dark chocolate. She is shivering and looking into his eyes, completely vulnerable and incredibly sexy. 

She tries to step away from him but he pulls her closer. He wants her badly and can't hold his desire any longer. He draws his legs closer together, and then flips himself and her around so that she is the one with the back against the wall. He pins her against it, holds her arms high above her head and then presses his lips against hers. At first, the kiss is cheeky and playful but it quickly turns into something much more intense. He sucks at her lower lip and feels her whole body shivering, then he darts his tongue into her mouth and explores it slowly. They part the kiss for air and look into each other's eyes. He can tell she wants him too. He leaves a trail of kisses down her neck and licks her collarbone while he slides his hands down her arms slowly till he finds his way under her sweater and top. He expertly unclasps her bra and pulls her sweater and top over her head, and the bra comes with them. Then he trails his fingertips over her front and teases her breasts while he tugs playfully at the waistband of her jeans. 

They kiss again, their tongues twisting and delivering shocks through their bodies. He kneads her breast as she unbuttons his shirt and pushes it off his shoulders. He gets the message and shrugs his arms out of the sleeves and the shirt falls to the floor next to her clothes. Now he can feel her warm body against his own. They are both lustful, their greedy hands touching and exploring each other's bodies and not having enough of each other. He then lifts her up and she wraps her legs around his waist. She immediately feels his hardness against her sensitive core and arches into him, bringing herself closer to him. He puts his hands on her waist and moves against her enjoying her softness and warmth. She moans into his mouth in response as they still kiss. 

He breaks the kiss for a moment and reaches around to unhook her legs from around his waist. He undoes her jeans and pulls them down along with her panties. Then, his hands cup her bare butt firmly and he feels her fingers trailing down his chest to the button of his jeans, which she easily undoes before sliding down the zipper. He looks at her face and sees her lick and bite her lower lip, her eyes filled with desire for him. He is hard and ready for her and she smirks playfully. She pushes his jeans down and he helps her. His clothes hit the floor and he brings one of her legs back up to his waist. She wraps her other leg around him tightly and draws him inside of her. They both gasp at the suddenness and their eyes are wide open with pleasure as his whole length starts moving into her. She moans and traces the muscles on his back with her nails as he fills her completely. He quickly starts pumping into her and feels her tightening around him. 

Their lips crush again and they close their eyes. They start quivering and their whole bodies tremble and throb as he keeps thrusting deeper, faster and harder inside of her. She moans in his mouth and then he feels every inch of his body tingling as the orgasm starts building. As he moves faster and harder, the energy builds up and with one final thrust, they both explode. He's fisting her hair now and her arms are around his neck and shoulders for support. They stay still for a moment unable to move filled with ecstasy, and then their bodies slowly start to relax. She leans her head against the wall, her eyes closed and mouth open for air. His forehead is pressed against hers while he tenderly kisses her lips and when she opens her eyes, she smiles to him. 

They slowly unwrap their bodies and she slides down the wall. She's still feeling weak and as her feet touch the floor, she loses her balance and he catches her in his arms preventing her from falling. They stay that way for a while, she against the wall, he leaning against her ―both breathing raggedly and unevenly. 

The alarm clock went off and Jensen opened his eyes. He was lying in his bed, his body covered by a film of sweat. He was still breathing raggedly and half hard. A wet dream, he'd had a 'wet dream'! He got out of bed and went into the shower. He felt the warm water running down his body and all the memories of the brunette came back to him. He was growing hard again and hissed, "God, what is wrong with me...I'm like a 'horny teen'!" He felt the heat inside of him building up again and thought "what the hell!" and jerked himself off in the shower. 

It was going to be a hard week just like he'd expected. Long hours on the set and getting home late at night, but that was ok, he'd grown used to it during the last few years. The problem was that he wasn't getting much sleep these days. The dreams hadn't stopped, and he couldn't get the brunette out of his mind. He found himself thinking about her night and day and it was driving him crazy. For Christ's sake, he was obsessing over a woman that he didn't know, not even her name. 

He was tired and he wouldn't be needed for another hour so he went to his trailer to relax for a while. He was sitting on the couch going over his lines when he fell asleep. Jared was free too, and thought he and Jensen could have a coffee and chat for a while so he headed for his trailer. He knocked on the door and called his name but got no answer. He heard some noises coming from inside and decided to go in ―maybe Jensen hadn't heard him? As soon as he stepped inside, he saw Jensen lying on his back on the couch moaning and breathing unevenly, and couldn't help noticing the bulge in his pants. Jared was amusingly surprised but he managed to hold his chuckle and walked away. 

Later that day, he saw Jensen with his laptop and sat down next to him with a cup of coffee. 

"Hey, Jen!" 

"Hey!" 

"What are you doing?" 

"Mmm...nothing, just checking if there's anything on the malfunctioning elevator." 

"Okay...so did you enjoy your nap?" 

Jared gave him a sardonic smile. Jensen looked at him in horror and knew he'd walked in on him while he was napping ―and 'dreaming'― in his trailer. 

"I swear if you tell anybody!!!" Jensen yelled at him clearly pissed off.

Jared started laughing so hard he almost fell off his chair. Jensen gave him a murderous look and stared at him both horrified and furious. That made Jared laugh even harder, but after a couple of minutes, he managed to calm down. 

"I promise I won't tell a soul. But see, that's what happens when you don't get laid in, well, a 'really' long time I guess!" 

"It's not that...it's..." 

"What?" 

"Nothing, just forget it." 

"Come on, what is it?" 

"Promise you won't start mocking me..." 

"Promise." 

"I mean it, Jared." 

"Okay, okay, I do promise I won't mock you or laugh at you." 

"Remember that girl?" 

"Who?" 

"The one from the elevator." 

"Not that I ever saw her...but yeah, she was trapped in there with you, right?" 

"Right. Well, I can't stop thinking about her...and those dreams I'm having...they're all about her." 

"Oh..." 

"'Oh, oh?' Is that all you're gonna say?" 

"What do you want me to say? I think it's just that you haven't had sex for quite a while now and your brain is going kinda crazy." 

"C'mon, if that was the case, then I'd be thinking about each and every girl I know and I wouldn't be obsessing over one in particular, right?" 

"Maybe. Hey...wait!" 

"What?" 

"Remember what the fortune-teller said to you?" 

"What fortune-teller?" 

"The one at that party...remember?" 

"Now, I do...What does that have to do with this?" 

"Everything! Remember she said you were going to meet a woman, that you'd be attracted to her immediately, your soul mate...'real hot sex'!" he said smirking. 

"That's just crap. She was making all that up." 

"Well, what if she wasn't? What if this girl is the one she was talking about during the reading?" 

Jensen hadn't thought about that. And what if that was true? He didn't know her name and he'd been surfing the web trying to find any comments on the incident at his apartment building but nothing had been posted so far. It looked like a dead-end street and he didn't know what to do next. 

To Be Continued...

*

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Meant To Be Ch. 05



I slowly turned to look at the page in front of me, and my heart jumped into my throat.

It definitely looked like me, all right. The woman in the drawing was curled up on one side in bed, naked but with a sheet covering most of her other than one bare leg. She was asleep, her hair in ringlets fanning around her face, a small smile on her lips. Holding my breath, I reached out a finger to trace the line of the pillow her head rested on.

It can't be me, I told myself. That woman is beautiful.

I could recognize my curls from when my hair was shorter, but this woman's hair was perfectly arranged, nothing like the frizzy mess that my hair felt like when I woke up. Her lashes were long and resting on her cheeks. Her full lips formed into a perfectly satisfied, dreamy smile. Though covered by the sheet, the artist had portrayed the supple shape of the body that was hidden from sight. The seductive slope of the leg that was showing, the gentle arch of her neck above the sheet, the graceful arm draped across her ribcage, the curve of one breast peeking out - none of that belonged to me.

It was clearly a rough sketch, only the woman and the bedding; nothing in the background to indicate the location. But I didn't need to see the surroundings to know whose room it was.

"Nick," I whispered, tears springing to my eyes.

Suddenly afraid to touch it, I rested my index finger on the corner of the page, methodically stroking the bumpy ridges of the paper. It occurred to me that was the first time I'd spoken his name out loud in almost a year.

"Yes, Nick," Miles said softly.

I saw a teardrop land on the page, away from any part of the drawing but I still gasped and shoved the stool back.

"Shit, I'm sorry," I mumbled.

Miles placed a hand on my arm. I glanced at him and saw his look of concern.

"It's okay," he assured me. "He has others. Many more, actually."

"What?" I whispered.

Miles put an arm around me and led me to a small sofa. He retrieved my water and the drawing, sitting next to me.

"He's been drawing this since long before I met him," Miles was saying. "He didn't show it to me until after the class ended. His work in class was technically good but always somehow - flat. He told me he'd mostly done landscapes, buildings...he wanted to learn more about drawing the human form. We kept discussing techniques and he finally showed me his series of this, to get my input, to see if he was improving."

I felt Miles watching me and I met his eyes.

"Cassie, this was one of the first ones he did, well before he took my class. And I saw that he didn't need my class; he just needed the right model to bring the emotion into his work."

Tears were spilling onto my cheeks. I looked from Miles to the drawing and back again several times, speechless.

"What?" I repeated dumbly, then rolled my eyes at my lack of eloquence.

Miles snorted a laugh and squeezed my shoulder.

"He's still drawing you. I've told him I think it's done. He thinks he's trying to get it right, but I think...I think he's trying to stay connected to you."

I shoved the drawing away slightly, leaning forward to cover my face with my hands.

"He told you about us?" I asked weakly.

"He didn't need to."

I looked at Miles quizzically.

"Everything he feels about you is right here - and in the expression on his face when he looked at it. I didn't need to be told any details about what it is between you," Miles said gently.

I stood suddenly and stalked across the room, stopping at the window to look onto the street.

"Then why did he end it?" I said bitterly.

If Miles heard me, he chose not to respond.

"Have you seen him recently?" I asked suddenly, turning to face Miles.

"Not for a few months," Miles said. "He's been back in London."

"He moved back?" I said, my throat constricted. My stomach was twisting in on itself.

"No, no - his mother was ill so he arranged to work from there for a while until she got back on her feet."

"Oh," I said hollowly. "Is she all right?"

"I believe so."

I nodded. I slumped to the floor by the window, leaning against the wall. Miles walked over and sat next to me, his arm around my shoulder comfortingly.

"He's - he's not seeing anyone?" I whispered.

"Not that I know of, but all we really ever talked about was art," Miles admitted.

"That's not me," I said suddenly, gesturing to the drawing Miles was still holding.

"That's you, Cassie," he replied firmly, still sounding amused.

"No." I shook my head. "I mean, maybe he thought he was drawing me, maybe he meant to draw me. But I don't look like that."

"Cassandra," Miles said in exasperation.

I looked up, startled.

"This is you. I've seen you in practically that exact pose, asleep. It's you."

I bit back my protest, seeing the honesty in his face. I looked at the sketch again, but instead of seeing the woman, or myself, I saw Nick.

"God, I miss him," I whispered, touching the drawing lightly as if it were him.

Miles gave me a comforting hug and I found myself telling him everything. He listened silently as we remained sitting on the cold floor, his reassuring arm around my shoulders. I leaned away to look at him directly when I was finished.

"Would you have shown me this if you knew the whole story?" I asked curiously.

"I guess. Why?"

"Because there's nothing to do about it," I said sadly. "It's not like I've suddenly aged fifteen years. And I'm still the niece of the guy who is like a brother to him, the guy who yelled at him and made him feel like it was morally wrong to get involved with me. Nothing's changed as far as his reasons for thinking it was best to end it."

Miles nodded slowly. "Maybe."

He put the sketch down, turning it over so we couldn't see it.

"I'm sorry, Cassie. I got caught up in the excitement of realizing how I recognized you, and it seemed like his work was such a romantic gesture - I guess I thought I would be doing this fantastic thing, bringing you two together." He sighed. "If I had known, then no, I hope I wouldn't have told you about this. The last thing I'd want to do is upset you, or hurt you."

I shrugged, patting his leg.

"I know," I told him. "Don't worry about it."

Miles offered to take me home, but I just wanted to be alone. When I got back to the village, I wandered around the neighborhood for a while before going back to my apartment. All I wanted to do was forget it, but the image in that drawing was burned in my brain. It was still early, but I got into bed anyway, hoping I was tired enough to sleep. Instead I lay there, the sketch flashing against my eyelids each time I closed my eyes.

Until now I hadn't had any word of him. My mind flooded with thoughts of how he'd been spending his time, mostly who he was spending that time with. The ache returned, growing from the pit deep in my stomach until it spread through my body until everything hurt. I still couldn't recall any of our time together fondly, despite every moment until that last day being so wonderful.

I sat up in frustration. I wouldn't be able to sleep. I called Gwen before remembering she was at her parents' for the night. Without thinking I dialed Ian's number.

"Hey, Cass," he said when he picked up.

"Are you busy tonight?" I asked. "I need to get drunk."

There was a short pause while he registered my words, then he invited me over. His friends were there playing video games and after a few drinks, I joined in. I became louder the more I drank, but it wasn't the jovial, giggly me; it was a biting, sarcastic version of me that entertained them as I mocked my skills as well as their own. His friends didn't know me well enough to notice, but Ian did. When they left, he sat next to me on the couch and stared at me with concern.

"What happened tonight?" he asked.

"Nothing. I just was feeling bummed out and wanted to forget about it for a while," I mumbled.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. I absolutely do not want to talk about it," I said emphatically.

"Okay," Ian said, chuckling. "Come on, I'll take you home."

"No!" I said quickly. "Gwen's gone. I don't want to be home alone."

"You want to stay here?" Ian asked with incredulity.

"I'm already half asleep on your couch," I pointed out. I was reclining against the armrest, my feet tucked under me.

"This couch sucks - take my bed," Ian offered.

"It's okay. Besides, I can't move," I told him.

Shaking his head, Ian laughingly picked me up and carried me to his room. He lowered me to the bed, looking at me cautiously when I didn't remove my hands from around his neck. I was staring at his mouth. Impulsively, I pulled his head to mine and kissed him. He drew away, looking almost alarmed. I tugged on his shirt until our mouths met again. His palms landed on the bed on either side of me as he tried to resist.

"Cass," he whispered against my lips.

"Kiss me," I demanded.

There was a moment's pause while Ian hesitated, then his arms circled around me and he kissed me. He pressed his body to mine, flattening me on the bed. He ran his hands along the length of my body, his mouth exploring mine urgently. The kisses became languid, his fingers finding their way to my hair. Ian rested a hand on my cheek and looked into my eyes.

"God, Cassie," he murmured delightedly.

He buried his face in my hair and hugged me tightly. I hugged him back, closing my eyes in anguish as what I was doing hit me. This was Ian. My friend, Ian. Why had I kissed him? It was only going to hurt him. I was struggling to find the right words when his lips found mine again. He must have sensed the shift in my emotions because he broke the kiss. He stared at me, trying to read my eyes.

"You still love him, don't you?"

It was more of a statement than a question. I shut my eyes briefly, knowing I wore a pained expression when I looked at him again.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

Ian rolled to my side and leaned against the headboard, pulling me into his arms.

"I knew it was wishful thinking," he said under his breath, stroking my hair.

He sounded resigned, but thankfully not angry. I sat up to face him.

"I am sorry," I repeated. "I don't know why I did that, but I shouldn't have. And I'm sorry."

"I know. It's okay." He put his arms around me again. "Now will you tell me what happened tonight?"

"It doesn't matter," I mumbled. "Nothing's changed."

We sat in silence for several minutes before Ian spoke again.

"You know, I've never seen you happier than when you were with Nick."

I tried to look up at him, but he held me tightly against his chest so I couldn't see his face.

"You were so...alive. It was kind of amazing to watch. Even though I was jealous, I loved seeing you that happy," he admitted. "And since then...well, maybe nothing's changed regarding the reason you broke up, like you say. But if nothing's changed then that could also mean that his feelings for you haven't changed either."

"But -" I began.

"I think you should talk to him," Ian said firmly.

"No, I -"

"Cass, you've been half of yourself since you two broke up," Ian interrupted. "Maybe you guys can't be together for whatever reason, but at least if you talk to him it might give you some kind of closure."

I pressed my face into his chest, trying not to think about Nick and failing miserably.

"You're such a good friend, Ian," I said into his shirt.

He patted my head, chuckling.

I tried to leave, feeling guilty and embarrassed, but Ian insisted I stay. We fell asleep next to each other, fully clothed, our hands clasped. I woke up before him and propped myself up to watch him sleep. His hands were resting on his stomach, his expression peaceful. I smiled softly at the sight. A surge of gratitude welled up inside me; I was so lucky to have him for a friend. I had to fight the impulse to hug him, feeling it wouldn't be fair. I tried to get up quietly but he stirred as soon as I moved.

"Want to get breakfast?" he asked, stretching.

"Thanks, I should really get home. I have to catch up on studying," I told him. "Go back to sleep," I added fondly.

He rolled over to watch me get up. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Thanks for last night," I said quietly, putting on my shoes before turning to him. "Your friendship means a lot to me, Ian."

"I know," he replied seriously. "The same goes for you."

I struggled to focus on my schoolwork, jumping up in relief when I heard Gwen come home. Barely giving her time to take off her coat, I filled her in.

"Whoa," she said softly.

I nodded glumly.

"Cass, Ian is right - you need to talk to him," she said, her eyes still wide. "I mean - Jesus, that's romantic. You have to see him. Right now!"

I snickered at her urgency. "He's still in London," I reminded her.

"Then call him! No," she added. "Not over the phone. But we need to find out when he gets back."

"Gwen -" I stopped, my throat tightening. "He's just going to break my heart all over again."

"I don't think so," she said, shaking her head impatiently. She sighed, her excitement fading. "Okay, maybe...shit, I'm sorry, Cassie."

I couldn't help a small smile; her changing moods of the last few minutes perfectly mirrored what I had been experiencing since leaving Miles's studio.

"I just don't see the point," I said, despair washing over me. "He said - he made it sound like he always expected it to end. Maybe he does still care about me," I added, thinking of the drawing. "But that doesn't mean anything. I was just something to - I don't know, a temporary thing for him. I bet I didn't make any impact on him whatsoever," I finished dramatically.

"Christ, he's been drawing your picture for months," Gwen said emphatically. "Of course you made an impact."

"No, I didn't," I protested. "How could I?"

Gwen was silent for so long that I looked at her curiously.

"You always sell yourself short," she said.

"What?"

"It kind of cracks me up," she continued, smiling fondly. "You think you're - I don't know – wallpaper. You have no idea how you draw people to you."

"What?" I repeated. "That's not me. Penny does that, not -"

"God, stop comparing yourself to your sister," Gwen said impatiently. "Penny's awesome, sure, but you're just as awesome. In a different way than she is, but you're not less than she is."

I gaped at her.

"I wouldn't have moved to New York if it weren't for you," she said quietly.

"Of course you would have," I said, my brow wrinkling in confusion.

"Oh, I always talked about it, I know. But it was a fantasy, something I never would have had the balls to do if you hadn't gotten on board," she said matter-of-factly.

"What are you talking about? You grew up, like, two feet from here."

Gwen shrugged. "I wouldn't have done it on my own. I think you would have, though," she added speculatively. "You would have been scared shitless, but I think you would have."

I kept staring at her, my mouth open in shock. She giggled.

"Like I said, you sell yourself short. Anyway, I know you made an impact on Nick."

I chewed on my lip, thinking about what she'd said.

"Maybe I'll leave him a note," I said suddenly. "To call me when he gets back."

I nodded again, this time firmly. Gwen clapped her hands together, making me laugh. The chirping of her phone interrupted us. I watched as her cheeks turned pink when she read the message.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's Drew," she said, trying not to smile.

I became amused as her blush deepened. Drew was one of her classmates that we spent time with often. He was in his late twenties with jet-black hair and hazel eyes that slanted slightly, indicating his mother's Asian ancestry. He and I had been talking about throwing Gwen a surprise party for her birthday in a few months and I'd gotten to know him pretty well. He was quiet, but very funny and an extremely talented artist.

"You like him," I observed teasingly.

"No," she protested. "Well, maybe. I don't know. Talk about being confused," she added with a sigh.

"I wish I'd known - I'll bow out the next time we hang out together," I said with a grin.

"No!" she exclaimed. "He's not interested."

"I find that hard to believe," I told her.

She shrugged and I could tell she wanted to end the conversation, so I didn't push it. My head had cleared somewhat at making the decision to contact Nick and I was able to get back to studying. Before I could talk myself out of it, I went to his building the next morning. George greeted me with a smile.

"Cassandra," he said cheerfully.

"How are things, George?" I asked.

"Good, can't complain," he said. "Mr. Hawthorne isn't in," he told me.

"I hear he's out of the country," I ventured. When George nodded, I continued. "Do you think if I leave a note for him, you could make sure he gets it?"

"Of course."

George held out a hand and I looked at him blankly, then flushed with embarrassment. It hadn't occurred to me to write the note ahead of time.

"Uh, I don't suppose you have a piece of paper and a pen?" I asked. "Apparently I didn't have the brains to think of writing it before I got here."

George chuckled and led me inside, giving me a notepad and a pen. Telling me to let him know when I was finished, he left me alone. He returned twenty minutes later to find me seated in the same spot with several crumpled up pieces of paper next to me. I caught his eye and looked at him helplessly. He watched me sympathetically for a long moment before kneeling next to me.

"What if I give you a call when he returns?" he asked quietly.

"Would you?" I said in relief. "Is - is that okay?"

"Well, don't tell the bosses," he joked.

"I would really appreciate it," I told him.

George stood, grinning and accepting my repeated thanks as I gave him my number. I left feeling just as uncertain about Nick but now I was resigned. It was done, and there was nothing left to do but wait for him to get back. I was walking away from Nick's building, so focused on my thoughts of him that I wasn't paying attention to anything else. I jumped when I heard my name.

"Cassie," he repeated.

Whipping my head around, I saw Jason a few feet behind me. My heart sank. I quickly glanced around to assess my surroundings; we were on a crowded street near the park but I instinctively turned my body away from there and toward the nearest shop I could see.

"What are you doing here?" I asked warily.

"I was going to ask you the same thing," he said conversationally, his smile not reaching his eyes.

He stepped forward to close the gap between us and I walked backwards.

"Who lives there?" he asked, jerking his head back toward Nick's building.

"Where?" I asked, trying to buy time.

"You know where. New boyfriend?" he sneered.

"No," I said truthfully. "Were you following me?"

"Nope," he said casually.

"Okay," I replied, not believing him. "Well, it was nice seeing you -"

"Wait," he interrupted, quickly taking a large step toward me and grabbing my arm.

"Let go of me," I said plaintively, tugging my arm.

"Not until you've heard what I have to say - I'm sick of you avoiding me," he said almost cheerfully.

"I'm not avoiding you," I retorted. "We broke up."

"And you won't let me apologize," he shot back. "You won't talk to me - Cassie, I just want to be with you. What can I do to get you back?"

I managed to yank my arm away and crossed my arms in front of my chest.

"There's nothing to do," I said harshly. "It's over. Please stop calling me."

"No," he said angrily, reaching out for me. "Cassie -"

"Is there a problem here?"

I looked up at the new voice and sighed in relief to see George. Jason was tall and muscular, but George towered over him. He looked between Jason and I calmly, but I watched him position himself between us carefully and knew he had seen our interaction.




Meant To Be Ch. 05



"I'm just talking to my girlfriend," Jason said coolly.

"I am not your girlfriend," I snapped. "Just leave me alone."

"I think you'd better leave, son," George said.

Jason glared at him for a full minute before turning his gaze to me. He stared at me angrily but finally walked away without another word. George waited until he was out of sight before turning to me, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"Are you all right, Cassandra?" he asked kindly.

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. George put an arm around me and led me back to Nick's building. He insisted on getting me a cab and paid the driver in advance despite my objections.

---

I kept myself busy with classes and the gym. I began sitting for Miles, which was not nearly as awkward as I'd feared. Ian and I still spent time together outside of work and it was thankfully not uncomfortable between us. I ignored Jason's continued calls, trying to forget them as soon as I deleted his messages. Both Ian and Gwen tried to convince me to go to the police, but his behavior seemed relatively benign and I didn't want to acknowledge how much it unsettled me.

It was almost a month after I'd gone to Nick's when George called me. I began trembling as soon as he identified himself.

"Cassandra, Mr. Hawthorne got back into town yesterday," George said, his voice serious.

"Oh, thank -" I started.

"But he left again this morning," George interrupted.

"He left?" I repeated.

"Yes. I wasn't on duty so that's all I know. But I thought I would tell you. I'm sorry I don't know more."

"No, don't apologize. I appreciate you calling me," I told him.

"I can let you know when he comes back from this trip, if you like?" George asked.

"Yes, please - that would be great. Thanks again, George."

"Of course," he said smoothly. "Cassandra, what happened with - is that young man still bothering you?"

"Oh," I said, my shoulders slumping. "He calls. I don't answer. It's no big deal."

There was a pause on the other end of the phone and I knew George doubted my answer.

"Is there anything I can do?" he finally asked.

"No, but thank you. Really," I said.

"All right. Take care of yourself," he replied before hanging up.

I sat staring at the phone after we said goodbye, not giving Jason another thought, only wondering where Nick had rushed off to right after getting home from London. Maybe he had a business trip, I told myself. I tried not to let myself fixate on it, but I found myself frequently wondering where he'd gone. That same week, I got a call from Kate to announce her baby's arrival.

"Little bugger came a month early," she said, laughing. "I didn't even have a chance to wash his clothes."

"He's just going to spit up all over them anyway," I joked.

We didn't talk long; she had only been home from the hospital for a few days and was, as she put it, on non-stop feeding patrol with little Henry. We were about to say our goodbyes when there was a pause on her end.

"Cass," she said hesitantly. "I saw Nick."

"What? When?" I asked.

"He and Dad came to see me at the hospital. It seems like they've patched things up, they were pretty friendly with each other."

"Oh. Well, that was really sweet of him to come see you and the baby," I said lamely. So that's where he'd gone.

"Yeah, it was." Kate was silent for a moment. "Have you seen him since you guys..."

"No," I said quickly.

"Hm," she said thoughtfully.

"Why?" I asked cautiously.

"I just wondered. He seemed sad," she said simply.

Then she got distracted by the baby and had to go. I don't remember what else we said or even saying goodbye. My heart was thumping in my chest and my breaths were coming in short, panicked gasps. I clasped my hands together, trying to calm myself down. Nick could be sad for a million reasons that had nothing to do with me, after all. The thought of his ill mother popped into my head and my stomach plummeted, hoping she was okay.

The trio of unexpected calls was completed by one from my father a few days after Kate's. I spoke to my mom often and my dad got on the phone if he was around, but in all the years since I'd left home he had never called me himself.

"Dad? Is everything okay?" I asked anxiously.

"Yeah, princess, everything is fine here," he assured me. "I just had a...surprising visitor."

"Who's that?" I said somewhat absently, no longer expecting an emergency.

"Nick Hawthorne," my father said.

It was as if all the air was sucked out of the room. Everything went silent and still as I froze in place, wondering if I'd heard him correctly.

"Who?" I asked stupidly.

"Nick," my father repeated.

"What - why - what -" I stammered.

"Yeah, that was pretty much my reaction," my dad said, a grin in his voice.

"Was he with Uncle Dan?" I asked, confused.

"No, though he had been visiting Daniel. He had just gone to see Katie - did you know Katie had her baby?"

"Yes, yes, she called me, I know," I said hurriedly, waving a hand dismissively as if my dad could see me. "What was Nick - why -"

"Well," my father began, and I could hear him settling back into his recliner as he spoke. "He said he wanted to apologize for us finding out about you two from Daniel."

I bit my lip guiltily.

"Okay," I said slowly. "It's true, I didn't handle that well. I'm sorry, Dad."

"Oh, honey, don't worry about that now."

"Thanks." I was blinking rapidly. "Is that - did he say anything else?"

"Not much. He told me how quickly you acclimated to New York, how mature and smart and capable you are - all things I already knew, of course."

I sniffed, my eyes filling with tears.

"He apologized for not giving us the chance to get to know him when you two were together, said something about how it might have made a difference," he continued.

"A difference?" I felt the hope that I had been trying to push down bubbling up.

"Princess, it sounded like he was asking for our blessing or permission retroactively," my dad said with a chuckle.

"Huh," I murmured. "That's weird."

"I admit, we were very concerned when Daniel told us about it," he said. "But after spending some time with him...well, I think it was reassuring for both me and your mother."

"Good," I said quietly, sniffing. "Can I ask you something, Dad?"

"Of course, princess."

I smiled at my father's indulgent tone. We may not speak often, but his love for me was never something I had to question. I hesitated, trying to decide how to ask what I wanted to ask.

"What exactly bothered you guys about Nick - was it the age difference? Or because he and Uncle Dan are like family, and that was somehow...weird? Or, that you just didn't know about it until after?"

There was a pause and I could practically hear my father organizing his thoughts.

"Well, it didn't bother me because of Daniel," my dad finally said. "They're close but I don't consider Nick to be family like my brother does. It was troubling that you didn't tell us, of course, but I don't want you to concern yourself with that now," he added quickly.

"Thanks," I said. "So it's the age difference?"

"He is quite a bit older than you, princess," my father said haltingly.

I bit back my objection that eighteen years wasn't all that much, knowing he wouldn't agree.

"I should add that your mother doesn't agree with me on that," my dad said suddenly.

"She doesn't?" I exclaimed.

"No." My dad chuckled. "She didn't see a problem with it."

"Huh," I said, bewildered. "I don't get it."

"Someday when you have a daughter you'll get it," my father said with another laugh. "In all honestly, no man is ever going to be good enough for my girls, whether they're your age or ten or twenty years older."

I giggled.

"Princess," Dad said. "You've always been older than your years. I don't know if it's because your sisters are older and all your cousins are older, or if it's just your personality or a combination of the two. But you've always been mature for your age, emotionally. Once your mother reminded me of that, it really wasn't that surprising that you connected with someone older than you."

I made a noncommittal sound when he paused.

"Besides, we could see that Nick's a very nice young man, good head on his shoulders. And he was very respectful," my father added.

"Yeah, he is," I agreed in a whisper, the stinging in my eyes returning.

"Cassie? Are you all right?"

The tears that had faded filled my eyes again at my father's concerned voice.

"I love him, Dad," I whispered. "I still love him."

There was a long, awkward silence. My father and I didn't share our emotions with each other like this. Finally he cleared his throat and coughed.

"I think you should tell him that," Dad said.

"Really?" I burst out.

"He said he was flying back to New York tonight," he continued.

I stood there numbly, not paying attention to the rest of our conversation, only wondering if I had the nerve to do what he suggested.



Meant to Be Ch. 06



Vicki lay awake in the early morning. Placing her hands behind her head, she looked up at the ceiling and let her mind wander. Last night was more than she could ever dream of. All her fears and concerns disappeared and she felt foolish that she ever had them. Aaron took her as she was, without hesitation. The physical act itself was overwhelming as she had never had such feelings before. It was as if it was her very first time. For the first time in her life, she craved more.

She rolled onto her side and faced him. Rising up on her elbow, she watched him breath. He lay on his back with his chest and one leg uncovered by the blanket. She listened to his breathing and watched his chest move. She wetted one of her fingers and rubbed his nipple. To her surprise, it puckered and rose up. Aaron squirmed but stayed asleep. 

Slowly she raised the blanket. Aaron's cock lay on his thigh, semi erect. She put her hand around it and slowly, lightly began stroking it. It grew bigger, harder. Unconsciously she licked her lips as she continued to stroke it. The feeling of it sent tingles through her body. It was velvet-like yet rigid. She moved her hand down to his balls. They felt cool to her touch. She stopped playing with them as Aaron shifted in his sleep but did not awake.

She kept massaging his balls with one hand as she moved her other back to his cock. Slowly she began to stroke it, up and down. Without thinking, Vicki lowered her head and placed her mouth on its head. A small drop of liquid had formed on the tip and she flicked at it with her tongue. It tasted salty. She opened her mouth and slid the head into her mouth. It felt good to her. She moved her head up and down, taking more into her mouth.

"That feels good," Aaron moaned.

Vicki sat up quickly, a look of embarrassment on her face. "How long have you been watching?"

"Long enough. Why?" Aaron asked, pushing himself up onto his elbow.

"Its just...I never." Vicki was clearly flustered and tried to leave the bed. Aaron grabbed her and she fell onto him.

"You did nothing wrong." He said and he kissed her. "I don't know why you are so nervous. You're perfect in so many ways."

"Are you just saying that because of the position you now find me?" She said with a twinkle in her eye as she pressed herself into him.

"I would say that to you fully clothed on a crowded London street." Aaron rolled her onto her back and kissed her. The kiss was soft and lingering. Vicki responded to it by spreading her legs, inviting him to take her.

Aaron broke their embrace long enough to cover his erect cock with a condom and returned to the kiss.

"I need you in me now. I need you to make love to me now," Vicki quietly said.

Aaron looked at her face and understood. He moved over her and slowly, gently entered her. Vicki put her arms around his neck and kissed him. "What happiness," she thought. Her legs spread and Aaron filling her. She stretched, her breasts arching into his chest.

He slid slowly in and out of her. There none of last night's frenzy. This time it was slow and passionate. They moved as one, in perfect rhythm. He felt his orgasm approaching. "I'm going to cum," he gasped.

"Yes." Amy moaned. "Oh God!"

They came together, as one.

They lay together, enjoying the after feeling. 

"What should we do today?" Vicki asked. "Where do you want to go?"

"Your choice. Where you think we should go?"

"Alright then. Let's get going." She jumped out off bed and headed off to the bathroom. Aaron watched her go.

"Hey, maybe we should stay in. We could think of something to do."

"Too late." Vicki laughed as she closed the door.

They dressed quickly, grabbed a bite to eat and headed out. They hailed a taxi and headed down towards Oxford Circle. There they got out and decided to go shopping or at least window shop. Walking along Bond St, Vicki showed Aaron some of the latest fashions. He offered to buy her one but she said no. They stopped at a jewelry shop and looked in the window.

"See anything you like?" Aaron asked.

"Yes," she replied. She turned and looked at him, a puzzled look on her face.

"Well? Which one do you like?"

Vicki was not sure where this was going but she agreed to follow along. Pointing to a sapphire ring, "I like that one."

"OK, let's go." Aaron took her by the hand and they went inside. "We'd like to see that sapphire ring in the window," Aaron said to the clerk.

"Aaron, what are you doing?" Vicki whispered.

"Buying you a ring," Aaron whispered back.

"What!"

The clerk brought over a few rings. Aaron pointed to the one Vicki had picked out. "That one."

The clerk handed it to Aaron who took Vicki's hand. Vicki didn't say anything. She was confused as to exactly what was going on. He slipped it on her finger. It fit perfectly. "You like it?"

She nodded.

"We'll take it."

Aaron paid the clerk and they left the store.

"What the hell was that all about? What does this mean?" Vicki was very angry, so angry she swore.

Aaron took her arm and they crossed the street to a small park. They found an empty bench and sat down.

"Look," he began, "We might not have a lot time. Who knows? I love you and I'm pretty sure you love me."

"I do love you, Aaron but what is the ring about?"

"It's a promise ring. A promise that come what may we'll be together at the end, no matter what."

"Are you asking me to marry you?" Vicki's eyes filled.

"Not really. All I'm asking is that you promise to wait for me. Then if it is alright, then marry me."

A single tear rolled down her cheek. "Yes, Aaron, I promise."

Aaron jumped up on the bench. "Attention, everyone!" he yelled.

"Aaron, what are you doing?" She tugged at his pants leg. "Get down."

"Remember what I said this morning about a crowded London street? Well, here goes."

By now a number of people had stopped and began to gather. "Ladies and gentlemen, this beautiful lady is perfect and I love her!"

A few people politely applauded. One man yelled out, "But does she love you, lad?"

Aaron looked down at Vicki. She mouthed, "Yes."

He turned to crowd. "She said yes!"

More people applauded and many yelled out, "Kiss her, kiss her!"

Vicki stood up and Aaron leaned over. In front of a crowd of Londoners, they kissed and the crowd roared in approval.

"You're crazy, Aaron."

"Yes, I am, for you."

They walked arm in arm on the streets of London, alone in a crowd of people. They went to see the Old Antique Shop that Dickens lived in and where he wrote his novels. The place was damaged some from the bombs but stood fairly much the way as it did when Dickens lived there.

"I understand you like Scott," Vicki said. " What's wrong with Dickens?"

"Nothing," Aaron replied. "Just not my cup of tea. I mean Ivanhoe is just more exciting."

"Knights in shining armor and all that, right."

"Yes," Aaron said. "Damsels in distress, too."

"So are you saying you like rescuing damsel, like me?" Vicki laughed.

"Yes, I do," and he kissed her.

Vicki took him to a nice restaurant to eat, a place where he ordered real fish and chips. A place where the two could eat in relative quiet and enjoy themselves. The place she chose was a small pub that her father took her to when she was in town. She liked to spend time with him while in London and here brought back warm memories.

"Why do you people drink your beer warm? I don't understand it."

Vicki answered as best she could. "I don't know. I don't drink beer myself, never could. It is an acquired taste." 

"A taste I'll never acquire. Would you like to take a walk back to the hotel?"

"No. Let's hail a cab. It's much faster," she smiled.

The warm water of the bath soothed Vicki's body. The soapy water made her body feel good to the touch. She relaxed as she leaned back into Aaron's arms. She closed her eyes and let her thoughts wander as he gently caressed one of her breasts. They sat in silence enjoying the moment.

"You all right?" he whispered in her ear.

"Yes, just thinking." She sighed.

"About you."

"What about me?"

"Aren't you afraid?" she said softly.

"About what? You and me? Never been more sure of something in my life."

"No. You know what."

He thought for a moment, almost so long that Vicki thought he hadn't heard her. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't afraid but really I don't have time. Things get pretty busy up there and everything has to done right. If I foul up, nine men could pay the price. I get plenty nervous just before take-off but once those engines start...do you understand?"

"I think so. That Morgan fellow was right. You are a good man." Vicki twisted her body so she lying facing him. She could feel his hard cock on her stomach. She squirmed against it. "I think we should get out before we prune up." She gave him a quick kiss.

They dried each other off and then taking him by the hand led Aaron to the bed. It was so different than last night. No pink satin gown, no nervous worrying, just two lovers about to enjoy each other.

He lowered Vicki onto the bed. Her sandy blonde hair fell about her bare shoulders. She was breathtaking. 

Aaron leaned over and kissed her, pressing his lips to hers. She responded by easing her tongue between his lips. His hand ran over her smooth skin. He stopped at her breast and squeezed. She moaned into his mouth. He pinched her erect nipple, rolling it between his fingers. She pressed herself into him. He began to suck, to nibble, to caress it.

"Oh baby," Vicki moaned.

His hand traveled down until he reached her thigh. He rolled his hand around the top of her thigh and pushed his way between her legs. She willingly spread her legs. His hand found her very warm, very moist. He extended one finger and began to slowly stroke her slit from top to bottom. Vicki buried her mouth into his neck and lightly bit him, leaving her mark.

Aaron continued to move down her body. As he reached her thighs, he lowered his mouth, pushing his tongue between her moist lips. She tasted wonderful. She gasped and arched her back. "Oh God!" He eased his tongue out of her and started nibbling on her clit. He used his fingers to spread her lips wider. He continued to flick his tongue over her swollen clit. He felt her tremble and then her hips lifted off the bed.

"Oh baby...Oh Aaron!" She grabbed the back of his head. Vicki had never felt such sensations. She began to let herself go

He pushed his tongue inside her, her orgasm washing over it. It covered his lips. He opened his mouth and tasted her second one. He moved back to her mouth as she relaxed. Aaron kissed her gently. Her tongue licked his lips and tasted her cum. She pushed her tongue into his mouth, wanting more.

Vicki was in heaven. All her inhibitions were gone. She would do anything. She reached down and grabbed Aaron's hard cock. She squeezed it, catching his pre-cum with her other hand. She smeared it on the tip. She broke their kiss.

"Make love to me baby. Please I want to feel you inside me." She pleaded.

He handed her the condom, which she slowly unroll to cover the length of his shaft.

He pressed the head of his cock into her. He slid between her moist lips and easily entered her. Aaron nibbled on her neck, raising goose bumps on her body. He could feel her warm breath on his neck. He began moving. Slowly at first, pulling almost completely out and then back in until their hips met. As Vicki responded he increased his speed. Her arms wrapped around him and clutched him tightly. Her hips lifted off the bed as other orgasm swept over her.

"Oh God, Aaron. I love you so much," she cried out.

Vicki pushed him off her. Sitting up she moved down to his wet hard cock and pulled off the condom. She needed to taste him, to finish what she started this morning. She wrapped her mouth around it, sucking him deep into her mouth. While her lips moved up and down his shaft, her hand caressed his balls. She increased her speed, sliding up and down his throbbing cock. Aaron entwined his fingers in her soft hair.

"Can't...hold...back," he moaned. "I'm cumming!"

She moved her mouth and his first stream of cum shot onto his stomach. She placed her mouth back on his cock as the next stream exploded. She pumped his cock, emptying it into her mouth. His cum was running out her mouth and down his shaft. She completely drained him. 

Vicki smiled at him, a trickle of cum at the corner of her.

"I love you. I have never felt so totally in love with anyone. I want to stay with you forever," she whispered.

He held her tight with her face buried in his neck. He could feel her tears on him. He pulled her closer. Aaron closed his eyes. This was the woman he loved. Though it wasn't easy, he was grateful to what had brought them together. It was perfect.

As they snuggled and renewed their strength, Vicki whispered, "I haven't done anything quite like this before but with you, it seems so right, so natural."

"We have all night," Aaron replied.

"Yes and all morning too."



Meant to Be Ch. 06



Chapter 6: The restaurant 

Jensen and Jared were back in LA for the weekend and decided to have lunch at a new small restaurant. They were sitting at a booth facing each other, checking the menu and chatting when Jared noticed that Jensen was staring at someone behind him. 

"Hey, Jen, what is it?" 

"It can't be...that's impossible...it can't be her." 

"Who?" 

"The brunette." 

Jared turned around and tried to spot the girl but the restaurant was full and he couldn't see her so Jensen casually, and discreetly, pointed at her. She was standing barely six feet away from them talking to a waitress. They could only see her back from their table, hour glass figure and that long dark wavy hair, and that she was wearing casual clothes, just heels, jeans and a white shirt. So far, nothing particularly stunning, but then she turned around as if trying to find somebody and they got to see the full front of her. 

"Man...she's a real hottie...no wonder you're having wet dreams...I mean, she has a nice ass, but check out her rack...plus she's got a lovely face..." 

"Hey, all mine! Okay?" Jensen yelled at his friend.

"Okay! Sorry, I was just saying!" 

"Well, just, don't!" 

Jared smiled at Jensen's reaction. He'd never seen him being that possessive before ―though jealous was a better word to describe his current mood― and he was happy his friend was beginning to move on with his life. It was about time if you asked him! Then, they both stopped talking and tried to eavesdrop at her conversation with the waitress. 

"I'm sorry. We have no free tables...and your friend doesn't seem to be here...does she?" 

"No, she isn't here yet...Must be on her way, though...Don't worry, I guess I'll just leave then." 

"I'm really sorry I can't be more helpful but we just happen to be full today." 

"It's all right. Really. Don't worry about it." 

Jared looked at Jensen and without any warning he stood up and walked towards the girl. He put on his best puppy face, the big smile and sweet eyes ―the one nobody could say "no" to― and talked to her. 

"Excuse me, I'm sorry to intrude but my friend and I accidentally overheard your conversation and wondered if you'd like to sit with us while your friend arrives," he offered with a wide smile.

"Ah...well...that's very nice of you...but I don't-" 

"It'll be just a couple of minutes, till your friend arrives," he explained and quickly added, giving her zero chance to turn down his offer, "We don't mind at all!" 

"Erm, I guess I could sit at your table for a short while if that's ok with you, of course." 

"Of course! This way please." 

Jared led her to his table and when they approached it, they found Jensen standing with a cheerful smile on his face and his hand stretched out to her. She couldn't believe her own eyes. It was the same gorgeous guy from the elevator and, gosh, he looked even better than she remembered!

They both smiled and shook hands completely lost in each other and, Jared, who immediately sensed the attraction between them and had been expecting a reaction along those lines, suggested they sat down, but not before blocking his side of the table so that she'd have to sit next to Jensen. His plan worked perfectly and she ended up sitting between the blonde and the wall. 

Jensen had his eyes fixed on her and didn't even notice that the waitress was waiting for their orders. Luckily, Jared stepped in quickly and said they needed more time so she simply got them some more water and bread. Right then, the brunette excused herself and went to the restroom leaving the men alone.

"Man, she's really hot...you never said she was that curvy...just like a dark-haired Scarlett Johansson!" 

"Dude, drop it!" 

"Ok, I'm sorry!" he apologized grinning and then added "Besides, I'm dating this blonde hottie, you know." 

"Really? You didn't tell me about it. Good for you, man!" 

"Yeah, we've only had a couple of dates but she seems great." 

Then, Adriana, that was the brunette's name, came back from the restroom and sat down at the table. Jensen stood up to let her sit and scented her perfume as she walked past him. It was fresh, inviting, and made him wish he could bury his face on her neck and hair and breathe in deeply till the sweet fragrance filled his lungs completely. Unfortunately, that wasn't an option at the moment and instead they talked for a little while about their jobs and lives in LA. Jensen was nicely surprised when he learned she had no idea who they were, he found it quite refreshing actually, and even more so when she didn't seem to be particularly impressed by it. 

"Wow! So, you're actors. Must be really interesting and exciting! Where have I seen you?" 

"Mostly TV, and a couple of movies." 

"Sorry I didn't recognize you, it's just that I'm not really into celebrities and gossip and stuff like that..." 

Jensen loved this. He had the chance to relax and be himself, not worrying about crazy fans or wanna-be actresses/models who wanted to take advantage of him. Right then, Jared's phone started ringing and he checked it. It was a text message, well, at least that's what he said. 

"Sorry, guys, something's come up and I'm afraid I must go now...but please you two stay and enjoy lunch!" 

Jared stood up and left and when he was at the door, he looked back at Jensen and winked at him. 

Adriana sipped at her water while Jensen stared at her with his gorgeous green eyes. There was tension in the air and she could feel his eyes on her face and body. It was as if his eyes were caressing every inch of her. She quickly dismissed those ideas, though, and thought she was imagining things, but she wasn't, that was exactly what he was doing. 

Jensen couldn't get himself to think straight. His mind was once again filled with pictures of her. She was looking straight at him seductively, lustful for him ―just as lustful as he was for her. Her lips parted and her gaze locked with his, her dark hair framing her lovely face in the sexiest way possible.

He imagined her in those blue jeans and white shirt ―though not exactly in the same way she was wearing them then and there! The shirt was unbuttoned and tied with a knot and her jeans were running low, really low, revealing a taut belly and hipbone he'd most certainly love to kiss!

There was an awkward silence of which Jensen was completely oblivious, completely lost in his own musings, when suddenly her phone rang. She felt grateful for it ―the long silence between them becoming too uncomfortable, not to mention his intense stare― and she answered it immediately. It turned out to be her friend Haylie, who seemed to be having some kind of hair crisis involving highlights. They talked for a few minutes and then Adriana ended the call saying she'd go to her place immediately. 

She put her phone away and turned to Jensen, who was still staring at her but was now smiling, and she thanked him for letting her wait at his table and quickly explained that the friend she was waiting for wasn't coming after all and actually needed her help so she'd have to leave. 

Jensen was desperate, he didn't know what to do or say to make her stay, but he remained calm, or appeared to be, while his mind went through a million different scenarios. Unfortunately, he couldn't think of a suitable one, but at least he knew her name now and where she worked, so he could simply google her, right? 

He stood up and was saying goodbye to her when two kids came rushing by the table and accidentally pushed her. She couldn't help tripping and almost fell but he instantly caught her in his arms. She was in his arms, again, their lips a few inches apart, their gazes locked. They both blushed remembering the elevator, him feeling lustful, her feeling shy, the same breath-taking attraction enveloping them. 

He looked into her eyes, and somehow managed to come out of the trance he was falling into and asked if she was okay. She nodded and quickly took a step away from him somewhat in a daze as well. He stood still, his arms on her waist, clearly refusing to let her go. 

She blushed and looked at them, and he reluctantly let go of her uttering a barely audible "sorry". Then, they said goodbye and he watched her leave the restaurant feeling his heart beating faster and faster and thinking "please turn around and look back at me" over and over again. And someone upstairs seemed to like him because the second she was about to walk out the door, she turned around, locked gazes with him and smiled.

To Be Continued....

**********************************************

Hi, there! Hope you're enjoying my story and want to read some more. As usual, feedback is appreciated! :-)



Meant To Be Ch. 06



I paced around my apartment for half an hour after we got off the phone. Gwen was in the studio trying to finish a big project, not that I needed to ask for her opinion. I knew she would tell me to hightail it to Nick's. I decided to wait until the next day, not knowing how late his flight would arrive. At least I would have work to keep me occupied.

As it turned out, our building experienced a power outage and once it became clear it would be out for the rest of the day, my boss let us leave at lunch. I was walking home when George called to let me know Nick was back. Steeling myself, I texted Nick.

I'll be at the Java House in an hour if you're free. I'd like to see you.

His response came almost immediately: I'll be there.

Thirty minutes later I was nervously stirring my coffee, my legs jiggling anxiously under the table. I nearly knocked my cup over when Nick opened the door not five minutes later. I almost didn't recognize him; he'd grown a beard. He was just as gorgeous as ever, and the beard only helped. It was a moment or two before I remembered to breathe.

He stopped just inside the door, looking around, and I stood up. When our eyes met, I had to grip the table with one hand as the jolt of electricity struck me. He took a step toward me and I sat down quickly, our eyes still locked. I tried to read his expression but the myriad of emotions flashing across his face made it impossible. So focused on his eyes, it wasn't until he was within a few steps of me that I noticed the cane in his left hand.

"Cassandra," he said happily.

I barely registered the joy of hearing him say my name in that glorious rich voice before jumping up and pulling out a chair for him.

"What happened?" I exclaimed.

"Ah, I broke my leg," he said awkwardly, sitting and stretching his leg out in front of him. "Just got the cast off so I'm still getting used to walking normally again."

"Can I get you a coffee?" I offered, hovering over him.

I rushed to the counter after he agreed, waiting there until it was ready. Unable to put it off any longer, I returned and set his cup down with shaky hands.

"It's good to see you," he said with a small smile.

"You, too," I whispered. "How's your mother?" I asked suddenly.

His head jerked back in surprise. "How - uh, she's fine. Much better, thank you."

I nodded. "How did you break your leg?"

"I was doing some work on Mum's house," he said embarrassedly. "Wasn't paying attention and fell off a ladder."

"Jesus," I breathed.

He waved a hand. "It's fine now."

We sat in silence for a few uncomfortable moments.

"How did you know about my mother?" he asked quietly.

"Miles," I said without thinking.

He looked confused, then his face cleared in recognition. His eyes shifted from mine to the table.

"Gwen took a class from him," I explained nervously. "She took me to one of his shows and introduced us."

I watched Nick, who was still looking at the table. I took a deep breath.

"He - Miles - recognized me," I said.

Nick's head shot up, awareness growing in his eyes as my words registered.

"From your drawing," I added unnecessarily, looking away.

There was another pause.

"What did you think of it?"

He spoke so softly I had to lean over the table to hear him. I tried to smile.

"Um, it was...I - well, Miles had to convince me it was supposed to be me," I said lamely.

Nick looked at me curiously and I forced myself to continue.

"She - the woman - she's beautiful," I stammered.

He smiled wistfully.

"She is you, pet. You're beautiful," he said meaningfully.

My heart flipped over in my chest. I gripped my knees, resisting the urge to fling myself at him. My eyes traveled down his chest to his arms, wanting nothing more than to feel them wrapped around me again. I began trembling, my lungs feeling like there was suddenly only room for a very small amount of air so my breaths were coming in short bursts.

"I never stopped loving you," I whispered, my voice quivering.

His eyes met mine in shock. I blinked away the threat of tears.

"I know I never really said it - before," I continued shakily. "But I did. I do."

He opened his mouth to speak but only shook his head slightly, looking dazed. My stomach dropped.

"I know, I know - nothing's changed," I went on, shrugging. "I guess I just needed you to know."

I leaned back in my chair and stared at my coffee. It was done now. I'd said it and any more words would be pointless. I wrapped my hands around my cup, wondering if I should leave.

"Cassandra, I am very sorry for the way I handled things," Nick said regretfully. "I made a huge mistake."

I looked at him in surprise. He nodded slowly.

"I never should have let you go, pet."

I swallowed, a lump suddenly forming in my throat.

"I'm so sorry for hurting you," he added.

"I'm sorry for what I said," I mumbled. "I never should have called you a coward."

He shrugged one shoulder, smirking. "Well, it was true. I was being a coward."

I shrugged again, focusing on my coffee. Looking at him through my lashes, I saw that he was again concentrating on the table. I couldn't read his expression. Suppressing a sigh, I reached for my purse and pushed my chair back to get up. I had opened my mouth, trying to figure out how to say goodbye, when Nick placed his hand on my arm, holding it firmly. His eyes were shiny with moisture and he looked almost panicked.

"Don't go," he said in a tight voice.

"But -"

My words were cut off when he stood rather gracefully for someone who needed a cane. He supported his weight against the table and took my hands in his, pulling me to my feet.

"Will you give me another chance?" he asked.

"But -" I repeatedly stupidly.

"I know I don't deserve it. I don't even know - certainly you have someone else in your life now," he said haltingly. "I just -"

"There's nobody else," I interrupted, still stunned.

He suddenly crushed me to him, his arms pinning mine to my sides. I inhaled deeply, closing my eyes at the feel of his body pressed against mine. His hands tangled in my hair and I let out a shuddering sigh, the familiar longing spreading across my chest until it felt like I would burst. I placed my hands on his waist, still confused. I was trying to think of what to say when he whispered in my ear and I pulled back in shock to look at him. He looked at me shyly with a sweet smile, his eyes holding mine steadily.

"Wh - what?" I stammered quietly.

"I said, I love you, darling," he murmured, brushing my hair off my face and holding my cheeks. "I love you, Cassandra."

My heart did a somersault, beating so loudly I could feel it in my ears. I just looked at him with my mouth open. This isn't real. This isn't really happening. I stared at him, convinced I heard him wrong.

"What?" I repeated, too stunned to be embarrassed by my lame reply.

He smirked, leaning forward to rest his forehead on mine, our eyes locked.

"I love you."

I watched my shaking hands slide up his chest and around his neck, seeing it as if the hands belonged to someone else. Then his words sunk in and I buried my fingers in his hair, pressing my mouth to his frantically as if trying to convince myself he wasn't a dream. He squeezed me tightly. The urgency of the kiss quickly faded into a slow, gentle embrace of our lips. I tried to pour all of my unspoken words into that kiss; I had to, because I wasn't sure I could say anything. My chest fluttered in excitement, which soon caused my breathing to speed up too quickly. I broke the kiss, my breath coming in large gulps.

Nick leaned in but stopped when he saw my struggle to breathe. He placed a hand over my heart. I could feel it pounding beneath his fingers.

"Did I scare you?" he asked tenderly.

"No - I -" I shook my head, closing my eyes and trying to slow my breathing.

"Cass," he said softly, placing a finger under my chin.

I opened my eyes to see him looking at me with concern. He had only ever called me that in the height of passion and my body flushed at the memory. I felt how large my eyes were and blinked.

"Watch me, pet, and breathe, " he soothed, exaggerating his inhale and exhale.

I mimicked him, relieved that my breathing regulated quickly.

"I'm sorry," I said in a gasp. "You didn't scare me," I said when I'd calmed down.

Nick glanced around the coffee shop before looking at me again.

"Can we - would you mind going back to my flat?" he asked cautiously. "I'd rather talk where we have some privacy."

I nodded and we walked the few blocks to his building in silence. George smiled brightly at us when we got there. In Nick's apartment, my eyes swept around quickly as we kicked off our shoes; it looked exactly the same. I let out a shaky breath as I walked into the living room, unable to believe I was here again.

Nick placed a hand on the small of my back and my body tingled. I turned to him and rested my hands on his chest lightly, his arm winding around my waist. He smiled briefly before his expression became heated.

"You are even more beautiful," he said softly, his eyes searching my face.

I watched his face get closer to mine, breathless with anticipation. When our lips met, we both sighed and melted into each other. He stroked my back, his tongue gently sweeping my lips before deepening the kiss. My fingers moved on their own, unbuttoning the top few buttons of his shirt so I could run my hands through his chest hair. I felt his arm shaking, the cane wobbling on the floor. I covered the hand holding his cane.

"Are you in pain?" I asked anxiously.

"Not even a little bit," he said with a smile, threading his fingers in my hair.

He pulled me to him and brushed his lips across my forehead before finding my mouth again. I slipped my hands under his shirt, stroking his back.

"I really did mean for us to talk," he murmured wryly, chuckling.

My eyes fluttered open to meet his. We were both breathing heavily, our hands still moving on each other. I knew we should talk, but all I could focus on was how his body felt against my fingers, the crisp smell of his aftershave, the echo of his voice in my head saying he loved me.

"So, talk," I teased, kissing his neck.

He smiled again, tucking my hair behind my ear. I leaned my head into his hand.

"Your hair isn't as curly," he remarked.

I giggled. "You grew a beard," I replied.

He smiled self-consciously. "Well, I wasn't going into the office in London, so I didn't bother."

"I like it," I said softly, bringing my fingers to his chin and tickling the hair.

He grabbed my hand as I withdrew it, kissing my palm.

"Can we try again?" he asked nervously. "I promise -"

I pressed my fingers to his lips to stop him.

"Yes," I said quietly.

He blinked rapidly, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he gave me that magnificent smile. I spoke in a rush.

"I just - I need to know what's changed. I mean, if I'm right about why you ended it - our ages...and Uncle Daniel -"

He frowned, dropping my hand and looking embarrassed.

"I regret turning our age difference into such an issue," he said sadly. "It shouldn't have mattered to me. It doesn't matter." He ran his hand through his hair. "As for Daniel - he apologized to me for that. We...we worked it out."

I nodded, still feeling uneasy.

"Darling, none of those things should have mattered to me. And I hate that they did. The only thing that's changed is that I realized it - realized what a fool I was. Realized I don't want to be without you." He sighed. "I don't know if that's enough -"

I felt like I could barely pay attention to his words, but they were filtering in. I watched him speak, seeing his gorgeous full lips forming the words. My gaze traveled up to his warm eyes and saw the sincerity, the worry, the fear. The rich timber of his voice telling me he loved me seemed to repeat in the background of what he was saying as if on a loop.

"I love you," I interrupted. I smiled shyly at the unfamiliar words.

He took in a shaky breath, closing his eyes in relief before looking at me.

"I love you, Cassandra."

He kissed the back of my hand, glancing down the hallway. I held back a smirk. Squeezing his hand, I tilted my head toward the bedroom and raised my eyebrows. He chuckled.

"I've missed you," he said desperately, placing my hand over his heart.

"I missed you, too," I told him, brushing the hair off his forehead and leaving my hand on his cheek.

He turned to kiss my hand and then his lips were on mine, hot and urgent, his arm locked around my waist. In an instant he was walking me backward to the bedroom, not letting go of me until we bumped into the bed. Nick sat on the edge, dropping his cane to the floor and guided me to stand between his legs. He ran his hands over every inch of my body before undressing me slowly, devouring me with his eyes. When my clothes were gone, he leaned back a little, looking amazed.

"Cassandra," he whispered.

He stroked my hips before moving his hands to cup my breasts. His touch was light as he met my eyes.

"You are just breathtaking, darling," he said thickly.

I rested a hand on his cheek and he nuzzled his face into it. Feeling light-headed, I finished unbuttoning his shirt and pushed it off his arms, admiring his body as I knelt to undo his trousers. The sight of his injured leg covered in faded bruises from ankle to mid-thigh made me gasp.

"Christ," I muttered, holding his leg gingerly. "You must have been in so much pain."

"The accident was a godsend," he told me, looking solemn.

I stared at him as he took my hand.

"When I was in hospital after my fall..." He hesitated for a second. "They - they weren't sure how badly I had injured myself. My back - I couldn't walk at first."

I gasped. Nick smiled and shook his head slightly.

"It's okay now. But that first day, going through all those tests and machines, not knowing what was going to happen...I had a lot of time to think, unfortunately, about the worst case scenarios. If it had been worse, if something truly terrible had happened to me -" He broke off with a frustrated sigh. "Cassandra, I would have died without you ever knowing how I feel about you. I would have died after stupidly letting you go when my only thought was how badly I wanted you with me."

Pressing my lips together, I squeezed his hand. He returned the squeeze and placed his other hand over mine, massaging my hand with his thumb.

"You were always in my thoughts, of course. I've been a miserable sod, pining for you and kicking myself for pushing you away. I thought I'd been a sad sight after Maggie's wedding, waiting for you to move here so I could see you again. That was nothing in comparison to this past year."

"Maggie's wedding?" I whispered. "You - back then -"

He nodded. "I kept waiting to get over you. But my accident made me accept that I didn't want to get over you, that it would be impossible to."

I sat back on my heels, gaping at him. What he was saying, the side of himself he was showing me - it still seemed unreal. He smiled, nodding reassuringly as if he could sense my disbelief. He scooted back on the bed, still holding my hand.

"Come here, my goddess," he said huskily.

I snickered and let him draw me into his arms, our legs tangling as our lips met. 

"Do you recall when I first said you looked like a goddess?" he asked, his hand traveling the length of my body.

"Your birthday," I said breathlessly.

"That was when I knew," he murmured, his eyes following the path of his hand. He stroked my arm then laced our fingers together. "That was when I realized I was in love with you. That I had been in love with you for quite some time."

His kiss interrupted my surprised inhale.

"I was too afraid to say it," he continued, his lips brushing against mine. "I wish I had..."

His hand slid the length of my back, stopping to cup my behind and press me to him.

"You looked so magnificent, wearing only my shirt." He moved his lips to my cheeks, grazing softly against my skin. "So confident and sexy, so aware of your beauty...you left me speechless, darling."

I blushed, not remembering feeling that way. My chest was tight and I could only watch him in fascination as I listened to his words. When his lips found the curve of my neck, I curled my fingers in his hair, pressing him to me. His soft lips gently caressing my skin were in direct contrast to the rough tickle of his beard and I shivered in delight.

"I knew then that I was lost. I should have told you then that I loved you," he said, meeting my eyes. "And if you let me I won't stop telling you at every opportunity in the hopes that I can make up for it."

"Nick," I said softly, overcome.

"I love you, pet," he murmured.

Our lips met passionately, our bodies pressed against each other. He rolled to his back, bringing me on top of him. I groaned into his mouth at the feel of him, hard against my stomach.

"I need you," I whispered.

"I'm yours, love," he said, smiling dreamily.

He nudged me back so I was straddling him and I rocked against him a few times before taking him gently in my hand. Circling my fingers around him, I felt pressure behind my eyes, so overwhelmed to be with him again that I was near tears. I slid slowly onto him and lowered my chest to his, letting out a deep satisfied breath. I splayed my fingers over his heart and he took my hand, holding it tightly between our bodies. His other arm wrapped around my back as we slowly moved together.

We exchanged tender kisses, never breaking eye contact. My chest swelled with the joy of being with him again, of knowing he loved me. I was so focused on preventing my tears that my climax startled me. Soon I was shuddering in his arms, tears filling my eyes. I buried my face in his neck as he began thrusting up into me.

"Oh - Cass -" he groaned. "Darling, I love you..."

"I love you," I gasped, holding onto him possessively.

We remained locked until our breathing slowed. Worried that I was hurting his leg, I slid to his side, my head on his arm. He took my hand, stroking each finger slowly.

"God, I've missed this," he whispered, kissing my forehead.

I sniffed, attempting to wipe my tears away surreptitiously, but he noticed and kissed my eyelids and cheeks.

"What's this?" he murmured.

I met his eyes, smiling. "I'm happy."

---

Nick dozed for a while, but I was full of adrenaline at the thrill of being with him and feeling his body next to mine again. I repeated our conversation in my mind, the memory of his words warming me from the inside out. Still only half-believing this was really happening, I had the ridiculous notion that if I slept, he might disappear. His arms were wrapped around me and I absently stroked his chest, listening to him breathe. I looked up at him when he stirred.

"It wasn't a dream," he whispered, kissing me.

I chuckled, hugging him.

"By the way, how did you happen to know the exact moment I was back in town?" Nick asked teasingly.

I hesitated, not wanting to get George in trouble.

"My dad," I said, glancing up at him. "He said you mentioned you were flying back to New York last night."

"What else did he say?" Nick's cheeks flushed slightly.

"Well, I told him that I loved you and he said I should tell you that," I said, grinning.

Nick surprised me by laughing.

"What's funny?" I asked.

"He told me the same thing."

"What?" I said loudly.

Nick nudged me so our faces were level, twirling strands of my hair around his finger.

"We had a nice long chat, your father and I," Nick mused. "I still don't really know why I went to see your parents, I just knew I had to..."

I watched him as he spoke, waiting eagerly for him to continue. He grinned as if he could sense my impatience.




Meant To Be Ch. 06



"I wanted them to know how I felt about you, that it wasn't some kind of passing fancy...that I had cared about you. That it had meant something to me," he continued, his eyes traveling over my face.

"Your father asked if I had loved you," Nick said after a pause. He smirked. "And once I recovered from shock, I told him I still did. He said and I quote, 'Well, don't be an idiot; tell her that.'" He smiled brightly at me.

I chuckled. "And were you planning to? If I hadn't texted you?"

"Yes. I didn't want to disrupt your life...it had been so long and I was certain you had moved on," Nick admitted. "But I had to try." He squeezed me. "You didn't give me the chance to be the hero and tell you first."

I giggled, giving him a kiss then leaning my head against his.

"You're so brave," he said tenderly, stroking my back.

"Brave?" I repeated in disbelief.

"After the way I behaved...even when you came round last summer, trying to get me to explain why I had done what I'd done. Do you remember what you said?" he asked unnecessarily. "You told me I was wrong."

I nodded, remembering.

"You were so certain about it; I felt like I'd had the wind knocked out of me. I think I fell in love with you all over again in that moment. I kept trying to convince myself that what I was doing was the proper thing, but you were right, of course," he added self-deprecatingly.

I smiled faintly, the questions hovering on my lips. It was pointless to voice them, I knew. As empty as the past ten months without him had been, if it was what was needed to get him to realize that our ages didn't matter, then asking him anything - why he hadn't come after me, told me he loved me, fought for us - was futile. Maybe it had been necessary, for both of us. After all, I wasn't the same woman I was when we were first together. Maybe it was the journey we both had to go through to find our way back to each other.

"And now...coming here, telling me you love me and not expecting anything - you were ready to just say goodbye and walk out," Nick said in amazement. "Brave," he confirmed.

"It's not like I was happy about walking out," I joked, hugging him. "It certainly wouldn't have been easy."

He shifted his legs and I touched his thigh lightly.

"Did I hurt you?" I asked worriedly.

"I feel like I'll never feel pain again, love," he said, chuckling.

I sighed blissfully, running my hand across his chest and then tickling his beard.

"How much longer can we keep this?" I said playfully.

He grinned. "They're letting me telecommute for a while longer. Actually -" He stopped and shifted himself up slightly. "Actually, I need to return to London in a few weeks and check on my mum. Once I'm back in New York I'll be going into the office again."

"Is she okay?"

"She is - she's recovering nicely. My sister is there now, getting Mum settled into her new flat, which is what allowed me to come back to the States for a bit. But she can't stay long." He combed his fingers through my hair. "Would you come with me?"

"To London?" I said excitedly.

He nodded. "I'm only planning to stay for a week or so, just to make sure things are squared away with the house. And...I'd like you to meet my mum," he added shyly.

I smiled warmly and hugged him, speechless.

"Is it too soon?" he said tentatively. "I don't want to rush you."

"I'd love to go with you," I said, stroking his mouth.

He gripped my hand, moving it away from his mouth so he could kiss me deeply.

"Will you let me take you out to dinner?" he asked. "To Palma?"

My eyes lit up and he grinned.

We took a long shower together, then I sat on his bed and watched him get dressed, my eyes following his hands as his clothes covered his magnificent body. Our eyes met and he gave me a slow smile, leaning over me until I was on my back. He ran a finger along the towel I had wrapped around me, nudging it open. My back arched, my body instantly responding to his touch. His eyes trailed down my body slowly before returning to mine. We stared at each other for several minutes before he forced himself to stand up.

"You'd better get dressed, love," he said quietly.

I smiled, only partly disappointed. I was nowhere near satiated, but it was a quiet hum of arousal. I wanted him again, but I wasn't impatient. I felt a satisfaction that I hadn't felt before, content with the knowledge that he loved me and we would have plenty of time together.

We stopped by my apartment so I could change for dinner. During the subway ride and as we walked, we hadn't been able to stop touching each other. Either lacing our fingers together or an arm around each other, even just our shoulders touching; our bodies seemed to be drawn together like two magnets. Nick wrapped his arms around me from behind as I unlocked the door and we walked in, laughing softly. I called out to Gwen, not sure if she was home.

"Cassie?" she called frantically from her room.

We could hear her rushing down the hall.

"Where the hell have you been?" she demanded, stopping short at the sight of us.

"Nick!" she exclaimed.

Her eyes moved from my face to Nick's and back again, taking in our happy smiles and our joined hands with her mouth open in surprise.

"Oh, my God!" she cried happily.

She darted over to give me a big hug and then hugged Nick, who was chuckling. She turned to me, a mixture of glee and reproach on her face.

"I have been worried sick," she told me accusingly. "Ian called and said you guys had a half day - neither of us knew where you were! And you weren't answering your phone!"

"Shit, I'm sorry," I said, digging my phone out of my pocket. "I forgot it was turned off."

"Jesus Christ," Gwen said, dropping into a chair as if exhausted. "We were freaking out that Jason had done something. Don't do that to me again, Cass."

"I'm so sorry," I said, giving her a hug. "I really am. This was - well, unexpected."

I turned to Nick, unable to stop a smile despite my guilt at worrying my friends. Nick returned my smile but looked confused.

"Who is Jason?" he asked quietly.

I glanced at Gwen, who bit her lip.

"I'm going to call Ian and let him know you're okay," she said before hurrying out of the room.

I took a deep breath and tugged gently on Nick's arm.

"Come on," I said, leading him to my room.

"He's a guy I dated for a little while," I began cautiously while looking through my closet. "He - well, he didn't take it well when we broke up."

"What happened?"

I turned to face Nick, who was sitting on my bed, clearly trying to quell his anger. His hands were formed into fists and his jaw was clenched.

"Nothing really happened," I said slowly. "But he keeps calling, sometimes he shows up at work or I see him around the neighborhood. That's all."

Nick stood and tried to pace, hampered by his cane. He tossed it on the bed in frustration.

"I don't talk to him," I said quickly. "I delete his messages and don't speak to him if I happen to see him around."

"Is he dangerous?" Nick asked gravely.

I hesitated, thinking about the night Jason and I had broke up. Nick seemed to intuit what my pause meant.

"Did he hurt you?" he said fiercely.

"No," I said.

"Cassandra?" Nick prompted, knowing I wasn't being completely forthcoming.

"He didn't hurt me...he - frightened me a little," I told him. "But I'm fine. It's nothing to worry about."

"What did he do?" Nick asked.

His voice was calm but he was looking at me with pain in his eyes. I turned back to the closet, quickly picked out an outfit, and faced him again.

"Are you sure you want to talk about this now? I don't want to spoil our night. I can tell you another time - even though it's really nothing," I added.

Nick studied me, his struggle evident on his face. He sat down again, sighing.

"If you had any idea the scenarios that are running through my head...I think it's best you tell me, pet."

I bit my lip, nodding. Closing my bedroom door, I sat next to him on the bed without looking at him. I took a few deep breaths, trying to choose my words. I still hadn't told anyone the specifics of what happened and I absolutely did not want to get detailed now.

"It was over the summer," I started. "We didn't go out for very long. He became - possessive. I tried to end it but he promised to try - to change - whatever..." I shook my head. "Anyway, I agreed to stay, to keep trying, and he expected us - he thought we would...you know."

I snuck a glance at Nick. He was watching me intently. I could feel the tension humming through his body.

"I said no and tried to leave, and he grabbed me and -" I stopped when Nick gripped the edge of my bed. "He tried to force himself on me but I got away. And that's it."

I pressed my lips together, staring at the floor. Nick exhaled slowly. I could feel him watching me closely.

"You never went to the police?" he asked quietly.

"No. He never does anything but call or sometimes show up in the neighborhood. He hasn't touched me since that night." My head jerked up as I remembered. "Except for when -" I began without thinking.

Nick's hands tightened on the bedspread, his knuckles turning white. "Except for what?"

I shut my eyes briefly, shuddering involuntarily.

"I had gone to your building - it was about a month ago, when you were still in London. I think he followed me there," I told him.

Nick sucked in a sharp breath.

"He just grabbed my arm - George was there," I went on quickly. "He scared him off."

"Why haven't you reported him?" Nick demanded.

I sighed. "Because, he never does anything. He hasn't hurt me -" I stopped when Nick made a derisive noise. "I just feel like ignoring him is the best way to go."

"Right. Because it's been months and that's clearly working," Nick said in frustration.

I stood and picked up my clothes, changing quickly in my closet. It was pointless; it was a small closet and I knew Nick could still see me.

"This is why I didn't want to discuss it tonight," I said, trying to keep my voice calm.

I sat on the floor to put on my boots, looking at him after I'd zipped them up.

"It's been almost a year, Nick. This is the first chance we've had to be together again in almost a year. I don't want to think about anything else."

Nick stood, holding his hands out to me. I let him help me up and he folded me in his arms.

"I know, pet - but now that I have you in my arms again..." He paused, burying his face in my hair. He leaned back to meet my eyes, holding my cheeks. "The thought of anyone hurting you is more than I can bear."

I leaned into him. "Nothing is going to happen to me," I said. "Look, we can figure out how to handle it later. Not tonight, okay? Please?"

He stared at me for a few minutes. I held my tongue, watching his face reflect his internal struggle. Finally he smiled and kissed me.

"I do like it when you say please," he murmured against my lips. "What would I have to do to keep hearing you beg?"

His hands became insistent as they stroked my back, moving down my body to cup my bottom and press me to him. I giggled, then felt him, hard against my stomach and my humor faded. He was wearing a somewhat smug expression and I narrowed my eyes.

"That sounds like a challenge. I think you're going to be the one begging," I told him, running a finger down his thigh. "But first you've promised me a nice dinner."

He chuckled. "I think regardless of which one of us is begging, I'll still feel like I've won," he said, growing serious.

I smiled in silent agreement as he lifted my hand to his lips.

---

As cliché as it sounds, from that day it felt like the world brightened: food tasted more delicious than I remembered; music seeped in and spoke to me as if sharing a closely kept secret that only a lucky few could understand; the city seemed more vibrant than ever, sparkling with color and sound and life. Even the chilly, damp fall weather seemed charming and romantic.

I spent that week at Nick's, aside from going to work. We cooked together, wandered around the neighborhood, and spent many delightful hours naked and rediscovering each other. I told my family the news while Nick spoke to Daniel. We made our plans to visit London once I got the time off from work, scheduling it over Thanksgiving and after Gwen's birthday party, which Drew and I were still planning as a surprise.

Nick's childhood friend, Declan, visited from Dublin the following weekend and since my birthday was coming up, we decided to have a small party. I was excited to finally meet one of his friends. Impossibly tall with auburn hair and bright green eyes, Declan was physically Nick's opposite, but their personalities were almost identical: easygoing, charming, and witty. They had grown up in the same neighborhood, had gone to university together, and were so close they finished each other's sentences.

I ruthlessly badgered Declan for stories from their childhood, ignoring Nick's protests, until people started to arrive. I was chatting with Nick's co-workers, James and Marco, when I noticed Nick and Ian in the kitchen. Resisting the urge to join them so I could eavesdrop, I forced myself to pay attention to the conversation I was actually a part of.

"So, how long have you and Nick been together?" Marco asked.

"Um, which time?" I joked. "We broke up almost a year ago and just got back together last week."

They were both nodding. I looked between them curiously.

"That sounds about right," James said with a teasing grin.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Oh, he's just been impossible for the past year. That's all," James scoffed, giving me a wink.

"Impossible?" I repeated.

"Grouchy," Marco confirmed.

I didn't ask them to elaborate but I couldn't help a smile. Nick joined us and the discussion shifted to work, so I excused myself after a few minutes. I ran into Ian as he was leaving the kitchen.

"Are you having a good time?" I asked, looking at him closely.

"Yeah," he said, glancing at Nick before returning his focus to me.

I wrinkled my brow quizzically and he gave me a small smile.

"Nick was just thanking me for looking out for you - in general but mostly about Jason," Ian said.

I looked at Nick and could feel the smile growing on my face. As usual, he looked fantastic even wearing simple jeans and a button-down shirt. As if he felt my gaze, he met my eyes and returned the smile, raising his glass slightly in my direction before taking a sip. Warmth rushed through me and I let out a small sigh.

"I told him you were pretty much my savior," I said to Ian.

He shrugged self-consciously. "I just did what any friend would do." He glanced at Nick again before continuing. "Cass, he's pretty upset about it."

I nodded. This wasn't news to me. We had only touched on the subject a few times during the week, both of us enjoying getting reacquainted so much that we focused on that rather than anything unpleasant like Jason.

"I know," I said. "And it's not that I'm not taking it seriously," I added. "I just want to put off thinking about it for a few more days."

Ian watched me closely. "I think he might be more upset about it than you realize. Like he's beating himself up about it."

"He's not responsible," I said, frowning.

"Well, I'm sure he knows that logically. But logic doesn't matter when someone you care about is in trouble," Ian said meaningfully.

I bit my lip, fearing Ian was speaking for himself as well as Nick.

"Just something you need to be aware of," Ian told me, smiling reassuringly.

I studied Nick as he walked across the room toward Gwen and Drew. I felt like I knew him so well, especially after this past week. It was unnerving that he hadn't fully shared his fears with me, though I understood exactly why he didn't. Turning back to Ian, I noticed his wistful expression.

"It's good to see you so happy again," Ian said simply.

"Thanks," I said softly.



Meant to Be Ch. 07



Newly minted Captain William's mood did not fit the day. The weather was clear and crisp with a hint of fall in the air. It was excellent weather for flying. Instead Aaron's mood was one of foreboding. He kept going over in his mind the news he received yesterday. Chet Morgan was dead. He had been killed over in Holland during a big operation, one that could end the war. Morgan was the one who coined the phrase "the 3 Musketeers" when they were at Princeton. Most thought he was referring to their hockey line but Aaron knew it encompassed more. It had to do with friendship and commitment to each other, through thick and thin. Williams, Morgan, and Callahan, together forever and now Morgan was dead. Aaron hadn't heard from Jake Callahan since he shipped out with the 1st Marine Division. He knew they had some rough fighting and were now fighting on some God forsaken island named Peleliu. Aaron hoped Jake was all right.

Bill Archer slid up alongside Aaron as they crossed the tarmac. "You OK?"

"Yeah, just thinking," Aaron answered. "What's up?"

Archer looked around. "It's Gilles. He got a letter from home saying his wife fuckin' around. Some 4F clown. He is taking it pretty bad."

Gilles was the "Tantalizing Takeoff's" navigator and was a real horn dog. Every woman no matter her age was fair game. He felt he was doing his duty to comfort them because so few men were around. Aaron heard rumors that Gilles had replaced him in the affections of Bridget. No one pushed it because it was still a touchy subject.

"As long as he does his job, I don't care," Aaron said. "Personally, it couldn't happen to a nicer guy."

"Excuse me, Captain."

Aaron turned to face an older man dressed rather casually in a flight jacket and gear. "Yes?"

The older man thrusted out his hand. "I'm Peter Smithson, AP news. I was told I might be able to hitch a ride with you today. I liked to witness firsthand what I have been reporting perhaps get a good story too."

"Don't see why not. I think we can find room for you. I'll tell Sgt. Rousseau to hook you up."

Today's mission was to Hamburg to bomb the Harburg oil refinery. It wasn't their first trip to this site, as after they destroyed it, the Nazis would rebuild it. The weather was clear with very little cloud cover. It meant they could visual drop as the target would be clear. Unfortunately it also meant a clear target for the fighters and the flak gunners. 

The German fighters were becoming more aggressive, more desperate in pressing home their attacks. Though none of his crew had seen it, Aaron was told that on at least two missions pilots had deliberately rammed some bombers. 

And the flak seemed to be getting more accurate. On the last mission, one shell passed completely through the port wing. It didn't explode and luckily missed all vital connections. Other one exploded nearby and fragments cut into the mid-section. Most hit behind the waist gunners so even though it looked like a sieve, no one was hit.

That was part of their luck and even other crews talked about. So far not one crewman had been hit and "Tantalizing Take-off" had suffered only light damage. With Army Air Force extending the number the missions needed to go home, it seemed to be only a matter of time before their luck was up. Aaron had an awful feeling that it might be today.

So far the flight had been uneventful. Aaron and Bill talked about how easy it had been so far. Even the reporter seemed disappointed. Aaron let Bill take over the controls. Archer had been the co-pilot since they arrived in England and he acted as if that was all he wanted to be. When asked, he said he was happy where he was and he didn't want any more responsibility. Aaron gave him more and Archer took it but it seemed when someone else pushed it on him, he refused.

Of all the people on the base, Archer was Aaron's closest friend. It was Archer who set him up with Bridget with the idea they could double date since his girl and her were good friends. That didn't work out mainly because of Aaron but it didn't hurt their friendship. Bill understood and never pushed the issue. Archer had met Vicki on various occasions and could see for himself why Aaron decided the way he did.

The run into the target was uneventful but the flak seemed much heavier than the last time. The fighters were thick and getting thicker. The escort fighters had their hands full but so far they were being successful. Maybe Aaron was wrong about his feelings and their luck hadn't changed. They dropped their payload, turned and headed for home.

Vicki was cleaning up the flower shop and whistling a catchy tune. She couldn't remember where she heard it but now she couldn't get it out of her head. At least it seemed to make the work easier. Not that it matter as business had slowed and wouldn't pick up until the holidays. Still, it kept her busy.

Ever since she returned from the trip to London with Aaron, she was much more cheerful. She smiled more. The glow was back in her face and she had let her hair down which gave a softer look to her. She knew why she felt this way. She was in love, a deep, complete love. It was a love she always wanted and dreamed of.

In the days after London, she tried to act like the old Vicki, the one that returned to Duckworth after Robin's death and retreated inside herself. She began to rationalize her relationship with Aaron. She was too old for him; he too young for her. When the war ended, he would return to America and leave her here. She was lonely and this was just a reaction to that. She was acting like a silly young schoolgirl, not a mature woman. It was just sexual; there were no real feelings. For every logical argument she came up with, Vicki returned to the same conclusion.

She touched the ring and twirled it around her finger. There was no way around it; she was madly, deeply, in love with Aaron. It didn't make sense and she finally realized that love didn't make sense. Something, maybe fate, had them meet. Her life with Robin had been as if it was planned. There were certain steps they had to take which led to the next one.

It was so different with Aaron. There were no plans, nothing saying this is the way it should go. All she knew was when he was with her, she couldn't be happier. No matter what they were doing, it felt so right. When he wasn't there, she counted the minutes until he came again. But every day she felt happy, cheerful, and alive just knowing he loved her.

"My, someone is in a chipper mood today," Vicki's mother said entering the store through the back. "Must be it's the good weather."

"Oh, Mother, you know it isn't the weather," Vicki laughed.

"Yes, dear." Mother knew the answer and she was almost as happy as her daughter. It had been too long since she had seen Vicki act this way.

Vicki moved behind the counter and picked up a small clay pot. Suddenly she staggered, dropped the pot, and clutched the counter. She swayed, almost losing her balance.

"What is it, child?" Her mother moved quickly to her side.

Vicki was pale and clammy. She felt unsteady on feet. "Just a moment, mother. I'll be alright."

Her mother slid the stool behind her. "Here, sit. I'll get some water."

She returned with a glass. "What was it? You frightened me."

"I don't know." Vicki said slowly. "Suddenly this terrible feeling came over me. I can't explain it. It was worst than when you say someone walked on your grave and you get that feeling. It was awful. What could it have been?" 

"I don't know, Victoria but its all right now," Mother said. "Don't worry."

Wham! There was huge explosion off the port side of the plane. The cockpit filled with black smoke and the smell of cordite. "Tantalizing Takeoff" seemed to leap in the air, ripping the controls from Aaron's hands. The plane trembled as he fought to gain control.

The intercom crackled with voices, all talking over each other.

"Quiet!" Aaron said. "Let's calm down and report." It was obvious from the feel something was badly wrong.

"Captain," Rousseau said from the top turret, "Look at the port engine #2." 

Aaron turned and looked. "Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" he whispered.

The flak blast had torn the cowling almost completely off and knock the engine off its mount. Oil and gasoline were streaming from it. Why it wasn't on fire was a miracle. It didn't mean it wouldn't.

"Billy, cut the fuel to #2. Then switch it off. We can't feather it." Aaron spoke as calmly as he could. Archer stared out the window at the damage. "Billy," Aaron said a little louder. "Do it now."

The cockpit was still in smoke but it was clearing. Aaron could see out the front now. A large piece of sheet metal was bent up, partially blocking the windshield.

"Captain, this is Wilson."

"Go ahead. What do you have?

Sgt. Max Wilson was the radio operator. He was knocked from his seat by the explosion but upon recovering he took an oxygen bottle and crawled forward. What he found stunned him.

"Sir, there's big hole in the port side. Must be 3, 4 feet big. Things are all tore up here."

"Anyone hit?"

"Yes, sir," Wilson was just 19 but he was growing up fast. "Lt. Gilles is hit real bad. I don't know if he gonna make it. Lt. Martini is bad off too. That reporter guy is here with me. He looks OK. A little groggy, that's all."

"See what you can do. I'm counting on you."

Rousseau came down from his turret. "Its bad, Captain. Without that engine and the drag of it and the hole, we'll never be able to stay in the formation. There are lots of fighters out there." He shook his head.

"Well, Sergeant," Aaron patting Archer on the thigh. "Lets see if we have any luck left?"

His question was answered in the next 5 minutes.

The enemy knew a cripple when they saw one and they swarmed to the attack.

"2 bandits, 2 o'clock."

"2 more, 6 low"

Aaron could feel the plane quake as the fighters scored hit after hit but the old girl took it. He tried to take evasive action to help the gunners but the plane responded slowly.

More fighters came on. Suddenly Rousseau shouted, "FW, 12 o'clock high!" His guns opened up.

The cockpit seemed to come alive with sparks and pieces of flying glass and metal. Aaron felt something white-hot tear into the outside of his thigh. He yelled out. 

As suddenly as it happened, it was quiet. The pain in Aaron's thigh was overwhelming. He felt he might pass out. "Billy, I'm hit. Take over." There was no response. Aaron turned.

Archer had his hands clutching his throat. He made no sound except a strange gurgling noise. His eyes were open wide. He seemed to questioning what going on. The blood was seeping between his fingers.

Aaron forgot his pain as a shot of adrenline went through him. He pressed his hand against Archer's throat. He forgot about his leg and put his other hand on the controls. "Hang in there. I'll get you home."

For the next hour, Aaron fought his own private battle amid the battle that was swirling around him. He fought to keep control of the big plane with one hand while he continued to press his other against his friend's gaping wound. He had removed his glove to better assist him and he could feel the warm blood oozing between his fingers. "Hang in there, Billy. Stay with me."

Around him, the gunners fired their weapons as the fighters bored in on them. They had lost the formation and were just a sitting duck.

The attack seemed to go on and on, but it ended abruptly when 2 P-51s came up on either side and scared the enemy off. They provided escort all the way to the English Channel. With a friendly waggle they departed.

The crew that was unhurt helped out with the wounded. Gilles and Martini were moved to the small space near the radio room. The reporter Smithson, came into the cockpit to check on Williams and Archer. He was horrified at what he found. The control panel was in a shambles and blood seemed to be everywhere. Aaron's hand was still clutching Archer's throat as he flew one handed. Smithson removed Aaron's hand and pressed on Archer. "I got him, Captain," as he removed the injured co-pilot from his seat. "You ok?"

Aaron nodded his head. "Take care of him." 

Aaron brought the plane down to an altitude low enough so they wouldn't need to be on oxygen. A piece of their luck still held. The reporter, Smithson, was a medic in the First World War and was doing all he could to help.

Rousseau made his way into the cockpit. The instruments were all shot up and it was difficult to read what was going on. One thing was obvious. Engine #1 was going to quit real soon. He wasn't sure if it was lack of gas or damage.

"You all right, Captain?"

"Never felt better, Sgt." How could he tell him that he was hanging by a thread but he had a job to do. He had to get these boys home. The pain seemed to be less and he hoped that was a good sign. What did Coach Grayson say? 'Pain is weakness leaving the body.'

"Captain, we need to start lighting the load if we are going to make it. Throwing things overboard."

"OK, let's do it."

The men began to throw everything out. Guns, charts, oxygen bottles, any thing that wasn't bolted down. Wilson started to throw the rubber dinghy out the window.

"Don't do that. We may need it," Smithson said.

"I don't think so." He held it up to show him. It was shot to shreds.

Losing the weight was enough to do the trick. That and the fact #1 held on. As the big plane rolled a stop, the men hugged each other and quickly moved to get those seriously hurt off the plane. Pete Smithson climbed to the cockpit. He wanted to thank the young man who got them back. What a story he would have.

He saw Aaron slumped over the controls. Smithson put his hand on Aaron's shoulder. "Son, I just want to..." His voice trailed off. He pulled him back. Aaron was barely breathing and deathly pale.

Smithson yelled out the window, "Quick, get a medic up here!"

Sgt. Rousseau didn't want to do this but he knew he had to. The Army wouldn't do it. It wasn't their policy. Only next of kin would get the notice. No one else. So he decided he would do it. He knew this wouldn't be easy so he dressed in best uniform and headed out.

He didn't have a plan of what to say or in what order he would see the three ladies. The flower shop was the closest so it was the first stop.

As he entered the shop, the bell rang above the door. Vicki looked up from the stool where she was reading a magazine. "Sgt. Rousseau, isn't it?"

"Yes ma'am," he said. He removed his hat and twisted it in his hand.

She looked at him. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"No, ma'am," He shuffled his feet. "It's about Captain Williams."

Vicki dropped the magazine and grabbed the counter. She turned white.

"No, it ain't that," Rousseau rushed to her side. "But he has been wounded. Docs say he'll be all right but it will be a while. I just thought you should know."

Vicki pulled herself together. "Please tell me."

The sergeant awkwardly backed up. "Sorry, ma'am. We got hit by flak just after our bomb run. Then we got hit by fighters. That's when the Captain got it. He was hit in the leg. Lt. Archer got hit then too. The Captain never told anyone he got hit and no one knew until we got back."

"Really?"

The Sergeant continued. "Yes, he flew the plane one handed and never told no one. A news reporter who flew with us found him slumped over the controls after we landed. He saved us because no one else could have flown that bird."

Vicki listened but it seemed like a bad dream. "Where is he now?"

"I think he is still in the base hospital but they may be moving him to larger one. I don't know. I'm only a sergeant."

She smiled. "Thank you, Sgt. Rousseau, for telling me."

"It's the least I could do. The men know how he feels about you. If I find out more you'll be the first to know." 

She sat down on the stool as Rousseau left the shop. She looked around the shop. She didn't know what to do. She stood up then sat back down. Suddenly she did something she didn't do when she found out Robin was dead, she cried.



Meant To Be Ch. 07



Drew held the shop door open for me and then plucked a few grocery bags from my hands.

"Cassie, I'm not sure you got enough food," he said in mock alarm.

"Ha ha," I said sarcastically.

He laughed. We walked the few blocks to his apartment, where we were throwing Gwen's surprise party, to store the food and decorations. I hadn't been here before and took advantage of his offer to look around. It was a spacious two-bedroom apartment, which surprised me since I knew he didn't have a roommate. I paused in the living room to look at the photos he'd arranged artfully on the wall. There was one of him hugging a pretty redhead and as I studied it, I noticed there were matching bands on their ring fingers. I turned away almost guiltily for some reason, and saw Drew watching me. He gave me a small smile.

"My wife," he said quietly, moving next to me and looking at the picture. "She passed away."

I swallowed. "God, Drew, I am so sorry. I had no idea."

"It's okay," he said, nodding. "I don't really talk about it. Gwen knows I was married but I think she thinks I'm divorced...I never corrected her because it just never really came up." He glanced at me with an embarrassed expression.

"I'm really sorry," I repeated, not knowing what else to say.

"Thanks," he replied. "It was almost a year and a half ago. We knew she was sick when we got married but..." He trailed off and shrugged. "We were hopeful, I guess."

I squeezed his arm. "Jesus, that just sucks."

"At the end," he said suddenly. "Once we knew - well, she made me promise I'd go to art school. And here I am."

"Sounds like she was very smart," I said awkwardly.

He smiled his thanks and changed the subject. I didn't stay long, almost forgetting to get his spare key before leaving. Our plan was for him to take Gwen to dinner while I prepared the food and decorated. I had just exited his building when I looked up and someone across the street caught my eye. It was Jason and he was staring directly at me. I turned on my heel and went back inside, racing up the stairs to Drew's without thinking.

"Cassie," he said when he opened the door. "Did you forget something?"

I was panting. "Jason's outside," I gasped.

Drew's eyes widened. He walked to the window but there wasn't a clear view of the street. He turned to me in concern.

"Do you want to hang out here for a while?" he asked.

"I have to meet Nick," I said, shaking my head. "Do you think - would you mind walking me to the subway? I'm sorry, I know it's a pain -"

"No, don't apologize," Drew said, grabbing his jacket. "Let's go."

Jason appeared to have gone, but Drew insisted on waiting on the platform with me and asked me to let him know when I got to Nick's safely. I felt foolish and embarrassed, wondering if I'd imagined seeing Jason. My breathing had calmed by the time I got to Nick's, but I still felt unsettled. I texted Drew from the elevator, trying to push it out of my mind before knocking on Nick's door. He had given me a key but I always felt compelled to knock first even when he was expecting me. I was just fumbling for my keys when he opened the door and enveloped me in a hug. My shoulders instantly sagged in relief, all other thoughts escaping me in the comfort of his arms.

"You are late," Nick said teasingly.

"Am I?" I asked, my voice muffled by his chest.

"Yes, you naughty girl," he mumbled into my hair.

He cupped my face to kiss me, walking me backward until I was against the wall. He drew away to look at me, grinning mischievously. He removed my jacket and ran his hands down my arms, stopping at my elbows. He brought my arms behind me, making my back arch and our chests meet. My breathing sped up and I smiled slowly at him. Just then he nudged my wrists up behind my back so he could capture both of them in one of his hands.

I felt a blinding panic grip me. Everything went blurry and all I could see was a dark shadow hovering over me, pinning my arms. Suddenly I was back at Jason's apartment and he was twisting my arm sharply behind me, about to do God knows what. Instinctively I jerked my body away from Nick, easily pulling out of his gentle grasp. I stumbled a few feet and flattened myself against the opposite wall, gulping for air, my eyes large with fear.

"Cassandra -"

I couldn't focus on Nick's face, but I could hear the shock and concern in his voice. He touched my shoulder and I cowered involuntarily. I sank to the floor and hugged my knees, gasping. Nick slid to the floor next to me but not close enough to touch me.

"Sorry," I said, panting.

"What did I do?"

"Nothing - nothing," I insisted, shaking my head. "I'm sorry."

I leaned over to rest my head on his shoulder and he tentatively put an arm around me, taking one of my hands and caressing my fingers. His thumb made small circles on my palm, relaxing me.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered, embarrassed.

"Darling, you don't need to apologize," he soothed. "Can you tell me what that was about? Did I hurt you - was I too rough?"

"No," I assured him. I took a shaky breath. "Jason - that night - he grabbed my wrist and twisted it behind my back like that," I mumbled.

Nick froze for a long moment. I continued, for once my fear overpowering wanting to downplay the situation.

"I saw him - when I was leaving Drew's. He was across the street when I left."

I stole a glance at Nick and saw his eyes were shut, his jaw clenched. He stood, bringing me to my feet slowly. Holding my shoulders, he looked into my eyes with a pained expression. Without speaking, he picked up my jacket and put it over my shoulders, then turned to slip on some shoes. He grabbed his keys and wallet before facing me. I stood numbly, looking at him in confusion.

"Are you - did you want me to leave?" I asked, my words coming out in a sob.

He gave a start, taking my face in his hands, holding my eyes with his.

"No. Never," he said firmly. His mouth curved in a half smile. "I'll never want you to leave," he repeated softly, caressing my cheeks.

I smiled in relief, warmth rushing through me at his declaration.

"Then –" I began.

"We're going to the police," he said, taking my hand.

I took a step back, shaking my head in protest. He cut off my words before I could speak.

"Yes, love. We're going to talk to them. We can't put it off any longer," he said grimly.

"But -" I pressed my lips together. I couldn't think of any argument against it other than I just didn't want to.

"Come on," he said gently, putting an arm around me. "It'll be okay."

It wasn't okay. It wasn't necessarily awful, but it wasn't very productive either. The officer we spoke with nonchalantly asked me a barrage of questions about my relationship with Jason and seemed to take every opportunity to point out that I had no concrete proof of anything. I gave him Ian and George's contact information since they had witnessed a few incidents, and Nick extracted a promise from him that he would be following up on it, pointedly writing down his name and badge number.

In the cab on the way home, I texted Ian to let him know he might be getting a call from the officer. Nick stopped to speak to George while I waited in the lobby. We were otherwise silent until we got inside his apartment.

"I'm so sorry I reacted that way - when -" I told Nick quietly.

"Cassandra, you have nothing to apologize for," he said tenderly, taking me in his arms. "I would never have - if I'd known -"

"I know," I whispered, pressing my face against his chest.

"I think you need to tell me what happened - everything," he said, hooking a finger under my chin so our eyes met.

I started to object, then acquiesced. We sat on the couch with me snuggled into Nick, unable to look at him while I spoke. Surprisingly, I didn't cry, but I did start shuddering violently by the time I finished. Nick held me securely, murmuring soothing sounds.

"I feel like I ruined our whole night," I muttered.

"You didn't ruin anything - none of this is your fault," Nick said, forcing me to meet his gaze. "None of it," he repeated.

I nodded morosely.

"Let's go to bed, love," Nick murmured, picking me up and cradling me in his arms.

I stripped and got into bed, surprised when Nick climbed under the covers wearing a t-shirt and boxers. I turned to him, clutching his back and trying to find his mouth. I could sense his hesitation.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Go to sleep, darling. You're knackered," he whispered, smoothing my hair.

"Nick, I need you," I said.

I propped myself up to see him. He was looking at me tenderly but I could tell he was barely holding some deep emotion - anxiety or maybe rage - in check. I kissed him softly, hoping he would take over. He let out a shuddering breath, his hands tangling in my hair.

"I don't want to hurt you, pet," he said worriedly.

"How could you hurt me?" I asked. "I'm not injured."

"Cassandra -" Nick's voice broke and he cleared his throat. "I'm just so - angry about this. Not angry with you," he added quickly. "With the situation - with myself...with him." His face flushed with anger. "I'm afraid I'll lose control of my temper when -" He stopped and caressed my face. "When I should be making love to you and treating you like my goddess."

"You wouldn't hurt me," I told him, covering his hand with my own. "You're not capable of forgetting yourself that way."

He looked at me doubtfully but didn't resist when I kissed him.

"Besides, you don't always have to treat me like some goddess," I told him, only partially teasing. "Please," I whispered against his lips. "I need you to take me."

I moved his hand to my breast and kissed him again. He hesitated only for a second before returning the kiss fiercely, his fingers rolling my nipple between them. I tugged at his boxers, kicking them down his legs, and slipped his shirt off. He flattened me on my back, kissing my neck and my breasts, his mouth moving ferociously as if he needed to mark me as his. I arched my back with a satisfied growl. Nick raised his head to look at me, his eyes wild, and I recognized his need to possess me for the same reasons I needed him to. It was the only way we knew to banish the memory of Jason, even if it was just for tonight. I slid my hands around his neck, staring into his eyes.

"I love you," I whispered.

He lowered his head for a moment before looking at me again, pain and anger and love battling with each other in his eyes. He entered me fully in one slick movement, groaning against my neck. Holding himself still, his lips found my ear.

"I just don't know what I would do if I lost you," he gasped.

I nudged his head to face mine, stroking his cheek with my fingers and smiling. Raising my hips slightly, I encouraged him to move inside me and he complied. His arms wrapped around me and he rested his forehead on mine, our eyes locked as we drove each other to the edge. Our lips met at the final moment and we cried out into each other's mouths, clutching one another desperately and falling over the cliff together.

---

"Surprise!"

I laughed heartily at Gwen's expression when she and Drew walked into his apartment. She staggered back, taking in the room full of people and was speechless for several minutes. Nick and I quickly walked the room with trays of appetizers to distract people and give her the chance to acclimate.

"You," Gwen said accusingly, appearing at my shoulder.

"Happy birthday!" I said cheerfully.

"I about had a heart attack," she said with a grin. "I had no idea you guys were so sneaky."

I giggled, giving her a quick hug.

"I can't believe you pulled this off," she continued. "And the day before your trip?" She gave me a pleased smile.

I shrugged. "It probably helped me to not obsess over it and freak out," I told her.

"They'll love you," Gwen assured me.

I smiled faintly, then encouraged her to enjoy the party.

"Is there something else going on?" she asked, looking at me closely.

I glanced around the room and saw Nick chatting with Miles. Looking back at Gwen, my smile softened, appreciating how well she knew me. I leaned in to speak into her ear even though the noise in the room made it impossible for people to eavesdrop.

"Nick made me go to the police last night," I said quietly.

Gwen's eyes grew large and she pulled me into the kitchen.

"What happened?" she demanded.

I gave her the brief version of the events of the previous day. She looked somewhat uncomfortable when I finished with the officer's comment on my lack of proof.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Well," Gwen began. "Don't be mad. But I kept all those notes Jason left."

"What? I thought you shredded them," I said.

"I was going to," she insisted. "But then I thought I should save them...just in case. I'm sorry," she added. "Please don't be upset."

"I'm not upset," I assured her. "I guess I should give them to the police."

"I have them at home," she told me anxiously.

"Gwen, I'm not upset," I repeated, smiling. "I'll get them from you when I get back from London. I don't even want to think about it anymore right now. And you shouldn't either - go enjoy your party," I added, shoving her back into the living room.

At the end of the night I was cleaning up when Drew took the dishes from my hands.

"You've done enough," he teased. "You throw a great party."

"Thanks," I said with a smile, wiping the coffee table. 

"Cassie, let it go," Drew said with a laugh. "I'll clean up."

I started to protest when the cloth was plucked from my fingers and replaced with Nick's hand.

"The man is right," Nick said.

He kissed my temple and deposited me on a chair next to Gwen. She handed me a beer and we sat in silence watching the men clean up. I relaxed in my seat, spying a game of Jenga on the bookshelf. I grabbed it and held it up, giving Gwen a challenging look. She giggled and we ended up playing several games, the men joining us after they were done. Gwen was on her third beer just since I'd sat down next to her, and giddily pulled a piece that she knew would topple the tower.

"I'm done," she declared, grinning as she rested her head on her arm.

Laughing, we picked up the pieces and put the game away, cleaning up the last of our drinks. When we looked at Gwen again, we saw she had fallen asleep where she sat. I pressed my hand to my mouth, trying to stifle my giggles.

"Well, now what?" I asked Drew and Nick.

Drew chuckled. "She can stay here. There's a bed in the spare room."

"Looks like you don't have a choice," I remarked.

He lifted her gently in his arms and her head fell to his chest. He stopped short for a moment, closing his eyes. When he opened them, I couldn't read his expression other than to notice that whatever he was feeling, it was strong and had taken him by surprise. Without looking at each other, Nick and I both whispered a quick goodnight and took our leave. In the elevator, Nick took my hand and kissed my fingers, giving me a sweet look.

"He likes her," he said softly.

"Do you think?" I asked anxiously. "She's crazy about him. But I don't know if he's ready - since his wife..."

Nick nodded sadly. "I know."

I leaned against Nick, his arms folding around me. I knew without her telling me that Gwen's feelings for Drew had only increased with each passing day. Drew wasn't the kind of guy to lead her on but I still hoped that she wouldn't get hurt. Nick tightened his arms around me and I knew he felt my worry.

"Don't fret," he soothed. "We've other things to focus on tonight."

"Oh?" I looked up to see his eyes twinkling. "Like getting plenty of sleep before our flight?"

"You can sleep on the plane," he told me, giving my behind a light slap.

---

I was too excited to sleep on the plane. By the time we arrived in London, I was jittery from lack of sleep but fueled by adrenaline and practically skipped to baggage claim while Nick laughingly followed. It was after midnight when we got to his mother's house, so we were surprised to find his sister in the kitchen brewing a pot of tea.

"Nico!" she cried, throwing her arms around him.

Nick was laughing. "Abigail, this is Cassandra," he said. "Darling, this is my sister," he added, slipping his arm around my waist.

"Nice to finally meet you," Abigail said, giving me a hug.

"You, too," I said shyly.

She was stunning, with dark hair and silvery-grey eyes. She and Nick resembled each other, but her features were most definitely feminine, with high cheekbones and full lips. Almost as tall as Nick, she looked somehow regal even wearing pajamas and a robe.

"Tea's almost ready," she said, flitting back to the stove.

"What are you doing awake?" Nick asked.

"I just rang off with Teo," she said over her shoulder. "How was the flight? You must be knackered."

"I am," Nick admitted. "Cassandra's been going on no sleep for days now. Ah, to be young," he said with a teasing look at me.

I stuck out my tongue at him and Abigail chuckled. She served the tea and set out a plate of biscuits.

"So when's the agent coming round?" Nick asked her.

"Actually, I've talked Mum out of selling the house," Abigail told him with a grin.

"What? Why?" Nick had picked up a cookie but his hand stopped halfway to his mouth. "Ab, you know we can't afford to keep up this place and Mum's flat," he said sternly.

"We don't need to," Abigail said. "Teo and I are moving back. We're going to buy it from her."

She smiled and leaned back in her chair, her hand resting on her abdomen subtly. I caught the gesture and gave a small gasp, looking at her excitedly. She met my eyes, her smile widening. Nick looked between the two of us in confusion, only noticing her hand when she exaggeratedly smoothed it over her stomach while looking at him pointedly. His mouth dropped open but he didn't speak. She nodded, chuckling at his expression.

"You two had better plan a trip next summer to meet the little one," she said cheerfully.

I congratulated her, then poked Nick in the arm. He was still speechless and I giggled.

"That's wonderful," he said finally, smiling warmly and taking her hand. "Congratulations."

"Thanks," she said, looking giddy with excitement. "So, Nico, when are you going to get to work and give my baby a cousin?"

Nick and I both choked on our tea, avoiding looking at each other. Abigail laughed but didn't pursue the topic, instead asking me about my family and my hometown.

"I like her," I told Nick as we were lying in bed.

"She's a nosy prat," he said, his body twitching with laughter.

I giggled. "Well, she's not shy." I kissed his chest. "I bet your mother is thrilled she's moving back. It must be hard with both her kids so far away."

Nick nodded, stroking my hair. He had two older siblings who were from his father's first marriage; I knew they were much older and still lived in England, but not close by.

"Do you think about moving back sooner rather than later?" I asked softly.

"I think about it." Nick let out a small sigh. "I don't know if I want to - at least not yet."

I nodded. I couldn't help wondering what it would mean if - when - he did return to England. Despite being confident in his love for me, I realized it might be inevitable that at some point outside forces would require us to be separated. I pressed my face into his chest, inhaling his scent and telling myself to push the thoughts aside.

"Besides," Nick continued, his arm tightening around me. "It's not wholly my decision anymore."

I looked up at him in surprise. He smiled shyly.

"It's going to take more than me wanting to be near my family for you to be rid of me, pet," he said in a voice that sounded like he was forcing himself to sound teasing.

"I don't want to get rid of you," I said quietly. "But, I also don't want to be the reason you're so far away from your family," I added regretfully.




Meant To Be Ch. 07



"You're not," he said firmly. "Regardless, it's not something we need to think about now."

I sighed deeply, snuggling into his warm body.

I woke up very early when there was only the hint of sun breaking through the grey sky. I tried to go back to sleep, soon giving up to head to the kitchen. I was surprised to see Abigail sitting at the table.

"Morning," she said cheerfully.

"Why are you up so early?" I teased.

She shrugged. "Too excited to sleep, I expect. We just learned about the baby two days ago," she added, beaming.

"Wow," I said. "It's a shame your husband couldn't be here when you found out."

"Yeah, but he'll be around for every second going forward, lucky duck," she joked. "I expect I'll be back in Chicago before any queasiness starts."

I chuckled, helping myself to some tea. "Have you eaten?" I asked.

"Oh, yes, I feel like I'm already always eating," she assured me with a laugh. "What would you like?"

I refused to let her cook for me, instead joining her at the table while we sipped our tea. We chatted about Chicago and her plans for moving back to England.

"Will it be difficult for your husband? Finding work and all that?" I asked awkwardly. "I have no idea how that works for someone who's not a citizen."

"Well, he's married to a citizen, which helps," she said. "He's from Spain, actually, so we have some experience with it. And since Spain's in the EU, it will be a smoother transition than when he moved to the States."

I nodded and we sat in silence for a few moments.

"Does Nico think of moving back, do you know?" she asked curiously.

"He does," I said slowly. "I don't know what his timeframe is, exactly."

She looked thoughtful. "Would you move here?"

I blinked. "I - well -"

Abigail giggled. "Sorry. I have a tendency towards bluntness. You needn't answer."

I smiled gratefully. "Thanks," I told her. "Don't take it personally if I don't have an answer."

"I just know he wouldn't consider it without you," she explained.

I looked at her in surprise. She smiled.

"I'm glad he stopped being a bloody fool about you, at least. God, he was insufferable this past year," she said in frustration.

"Abigail Elizabeth Hawthorne," a voice from the doorway said sharply.

Abigail and I turned to see Nick leaning against the doorframe with his arms folded across his chest.

"You have a big mouth," he continued, the corners of his mouth twitching.

Abigail shrugged and smiled innocently.

"You're just lucky you're with child," he told her. "What would you ladies like for breakfast?"

We spoke benignly about the baby as Nick cooked. I was grateful Abigail was talkative since watching Nick work distracted me. I found everything he did appealing, but there was something especially sexy about him when he was in the kitchen. I realized the room was silent other than the sounds of him cooking and I turned to see Abigail looking at me in amusement. She hid her grin behind her cup as I blushed.

"I told Mum we'd come round for lunch," Abigail told us. "And Charlotte and Edward and the lot will be coming later in the week to see you."

Nick nodded absently, setting down plates in front of us.

"You're about to be overrun with Hawthornes, pet," he said as he sat down next to me, touching my arm lightly.

I smiled to hide my nervousness.

Nick's mother was a shorter version of Abigail. I knew she was in her early sixties, but her hair was dark brown without a hint of white, her grey eyes sparkling with life. She used a walker as she recovered from her illness, but she was still bubbly and energetic. She immediately ordered her children to the kitchen to prepare lunch and instructed me to sit with her so we could talk.

"So. You're Cassandra," she said, looking at me over her glasses.

"You can call me Cassie, if you like," I said shyly. "Nick insists on Cassandra, but everyone else calls me Cassie."

"The curse of prophecy," she murmured teasingly.

"Yes, or just plain old insane, depending on who you read," I said, chuckling.

Mrs. Hawthorne burst out laughing. "Well, it's a lovely name regardless. Now, tell me about yourself."

"Mum," Nick called from the kitchen. "Be nice."

"I'm always nice, Nicholas," she protested, winking at me.

I grinned. She looked at me expectantly so I nervously gave her my brief history. I could see where Nick got his conversational skills; his mother asked the same kind of questions - polite but probing enough that they required a thoughtful response. By the time lunch was ready, she and I were leaning toward each other, excitedly discussing books and my graduate degree.

"I forgot you're studying library science," Abigail said as we sat at the table.

Nick sat across from me and I felt his foot make contact with mine. When our eyes met he raised his eyebrows questioningly and I smiled reassuringly. He knew how nervous I'd been about meeting his mother. I turned to Abigail and nodded.

"You'll have to give me any advice you can think of," I told her.

"Won't help now," Nick said. "She'll be off having babies instead of working."

He winked at his sister, who waved her knife at him threateningly.

"Do you think you'll have a difficult time finding a job here with an American degree?" I asked Abigail carefully.

She glanced at Nick and I saw a small smile on his lips. I nudged his foot and his smile widened when our eyes met. He hooked his foot around my ankle and locked it between his calves. I heard Abigail answering my question but couldn't register her words. If she or their mother noticed, they were polite enough not to let on.

After lunch, Nick's mother ordered us to go home and rest. Abigail told us she would be staying at the flat during our visit to give us some privacy, which made me blush and Nick laugh. It was a twenty-minute walk from the flat to the house, and we took it leisurely, stopping in bookstores or shops and finally a cafe for tea along the way. It reminded me of our weekend explorations when I first moved to New York and I found myself smiling happily despite my fatigue.

"Let's get you to bed, love," Nick murmured as we left the cafe.

I covered a yawn. "I'm not tired," I protested.

"I didn't say anything about sleep," he told me sternly, pulling me close.

We did sleep, eventually. I had the foresight to set the alarm so we woke up in time to meet his family for dinner. Abigail and Mrs. Hawthorne had prepared a wonderful meal and I ate heartily while listening to their easy conversation.

"What do you have planned for tomorrow?" Mrs. Hawthorne asked us.

"I didn't plan anything - I thought I was going to be dealing with the house and agents all week," Nick said with a teasing glance at Abigail.

She made a face at him. "I have to check in with work tomorrow and try to get some things done - you should take the car and take a day trip somewhere."

"What do you think?" Nick asked me.

I shrugged, smiling. "I'm up for anything. Will you be able to join us, Mrs. Hawthorne?" I added politely.

"Oh, call me Louise, dear," she said sweetly. "I don't want to barge in on your holiday."

"It's not really a holiday," I said. "The point was to see you."

Louise beamed at me and I blushed. I heard Nick cough and looked at him to find him holding back a laugh.

"Nicely done, pet," he teased.

"Shut up," I muttered, grinning. "It's true."

The week went by too quickly. Nick and I took in a few shows but most of our time was spent with his family, either for meals or museum visits or day trips. Abigail and I spent one day shopping while Nick took his mother to a few doctor's appointments. I insisted on buying the baby a stuffed animal and adorable sweater set. Their older brother and sister came to town with their families a few days before we were scheduled to leave. The house was full of siblings and children and noise and food, and it was delightful.

After Charlotte and Edward left with their families, I took Louise back to her flat while Nick and Abigail tidied up the house. Abigail had arranged to be on our flight to New York and wanted to prepare the house for a few months of vacancy. I felt completely relaxed with Louise by this point; she was funny and spirited, but with a slightly wicked edge. She didn't seem to take anything too seriously, and it occurred to me she must have been a fun mother to have. I said as much and she looked puzzled.

"Fun?" she repeated.

"Well, you know - playful," I tried to explain awkwardly. "You seem like the type of mom to get down on the floor with the kids, come up with games to play with them, things like that."

"What else would mothers do?" She looked baffled. "Your mum didn't do that?"

"Not really," I said, only now realizing it. "She worked a lot. I played with my sisters, of course," I added, hoping I didn't sound defensive.

"Half the reason I had children was so I'd have a reason to keep acting like I was still a child," she said, giggling.

"You must be so excited about Abigail moving back, and the baby," I said with a grin.

"Dear, you have no idea," she declared. "I never thought I'd wait this long. Of course I have Charlotte and Edward's children, but I don't see them often. I don't know where I went wrong that Abigail and Nicholas have taken so long to settle down."

I gave a small start at the mention of Nick settling down, but she didn't comment on it.

"Well, sometimes it takes people a while to find the right person or be ready, I guess," I mused. "My sisters are close to thirty and neither are close to settling down."

"Aren't your parents anxious for grandchildren?" she asked curiously.

"They don't act like it. They always encouraged us to get our careers established and travel and that kind of thing before thinking about marriage," I told her. "Pretty American, huh?" I added teasingly.

She shrugged. "Not particularly - my two aren't American, after all," she joked. "And you, dear? Do you think about settling down?"

I smiled indulgently. I had been waiting for a question of this kind, though I had been expecting it from Abigail.

"I don't know," I admitted.

Louise responded with a small nod. It was on the tip of my tongue to elaborate, despite not knowing what to say about it. Nick and I had only recently reunited, though once we got back together it felt like our time apart had been mere seconds. While I felt wholly committed to him and knew he felt the same way about me, it was impossible to know what the future held. I didn't want to be with anyone else and I couldn't imagine that changing. But our age difference was there, after all. The fact that he was over forty and had never married made me wonder if it was something he just wasn't interested in.

"I guess I don't know - what Nick's...intentions are?" I said quietly. "I mean, he's never been married and I'm sure he had plenty of opportunities. I guess I assumed it wasn't something he was interested in."

Louise studied me for several minutes, her head tilted thoughtfully.

"He might not have been in the past," she said softly. "I think that's changed now."

"Really?" I asked, unable to prevent the hopeful tone. "I sometimes wonder if the age difference still bothers him, if that will become an issue again."

I twisted my hands in my lap. Until now I hadn't allowed myself to voice this fear even to myself, but I realized it had always been lingering in the recesses of my mind, as if I was waiting for another shoe to drop. Louise scoffed, waving her hand dismissively.

"He was a fool about that. And I think he realizes it, too," she said firmly. "I'm twenty years younger than his father, and we were very happy."

I smiled gratefully. I hadn't thought about the age difference between his parents. Nick and Abigail soon arrived and we put together a light dinner before he and I headed back to the house.

"Did Mum pester you with questions?" he asked on the walk home.

"No," I said, chuckling. "We just talked. She wasn't intrusive."

"She likes you," he remarked, hugging me to him.

"I like her," I replied meaningfully. "I like your whole family."

I looked up at him with a smile. Nick kissed my forehead and looked pleased.

"Are you glad the house isn't being sold to a stranger?" I asked when we arrived.

I had paused in Nick's old bedroom doorway to look at the height marks his parents had made as he grew, tracing each dated line with my finger, a soft smile on my face. Nick stood behind me, wrapping his arms around me.

"Actually, I am," he admitted. "I love this house."

"I wish I could have met your dad," I said softly.

"He would have loved you," Nick said, nuzzling my neck.

"Oh?" I asked breathlessly, shivering at his touch.

"Mm," he murmured, his throat vibrating against my skin. "Thank you for coming here with me, love."

I sighed happily, turning to meet his eyes. "Thank you for asking me," I said sincerely.

He straightened up and touched my cheek lightly, a cryptic smile on his face.

"Is that all I need to do? Ask?"

His voice was light as if he was trying to tease, but his eyes searched mine intently. I placed my fingers over his. I couldn't determine the meaning behind his question, but whether or not he was talking about something specific my answer would be the same.

"Yes," I said simply.

He smiled slowly, the brown depths of his eyes warm. I watched the corners crinkle and felt my breath catch. He kissed me softly at first, then deepened the kiss. I had to steady myself against the doorframe when his lips moved to my ear, then trailed down my neck.

"Nick," I panted.

I reached behind me to twist my fingers in his hair, my head falling back. He curled his fingers on my cheek, then cupped my breast, brushing the nipple with his thumb. His hand traveled down my stomach to my skirt, pulling the material up my legs. I groaned and pushed back against him. His teeth closed on my neck, his hands stroking my inner thighs.

"Nick - God." I dragged out the words in a gasp.

He spun me around and kissed me deeply.

"I want you, Cassandra," he whispered. "I need you."

"I'm all yours," I breathed.

His hands had been cupping my face but quickly moved down the sides of my body, tracing each part of me with his fingers as if committing it to memory. I untucked his shirt frantically, digging my nails into his back. Our tongues danced around each other urgently and I arched my hips into his, needing to get closer. Suddenly Nick gripped me under my arms and lifted me up, hooking my legs around his waist one at a time.

"Lift up your skirt, love," he said in a rough voice.

I hitched my skirt up, bunching it around my waist and gripped his shoulders. I felt him undoing his pants and moaned. He gasped against my lips when he sprung free and searched for my panties. I whimpered when I felt him teasing between my legs, rocking against his fingers.

He shoved aside the crotch of my underwear and positioned himself. Cupping my bottom, he slowly lowered me onto him and we both groaned. I locked my ankles behind him and he turned to press me up against the wall. Snaking his arms up my back, he grasped my shoulders and began thrusting into me. I rested my head against the wall, closing my eyes to concentrate of the feel of him. He inhaled sharply when he felt me fluttering around him.

"Look at me, pet," he said.

I slowly opened my eyes to see his, heated and intense. I tangled my fingers in his hair tightly as I began crying out. His lips captured mine, swallowing my moans and screams. I was still crying out when he found his release, groaning into my mouth. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I buried my face in his neck, so overwhelmed that my eyes filled with tears.

"God, I love you," I whispered.

He squeezed me tighter and walked to the bed, tipping us over so we were lying down still wrapped around each other.

"I love you, darling," he murmured, brushing the hair off my face and looking at me tenderly. "I love you so much," he added, his lips against mine.



Meant to Be Ch. 08



"Thanks, Sgt."

"No problem, Sir."

Aaron slammed the car door and looked around. It had been over 2 months since he had been on base. It hadn't changed that much. There was a Christmas tree near the flagpole now. He noticed that there were some unusual decorations on it especially the nylons. He wondered who found the female mannequin leg.

His wound was still giving some trouble but he decided it was time to get out of that hospital. He was going stir crazy. He was given a cane to help him walk but he used it as little as possible. Somehow he was going to convince those above him he was all right.

Aaron realized how lucky was. The bullet that struck him hit just outside and above his knee. It cut a deep furrow up his thigh and out. Muscles were cut and it bled like a stuck pig. It just nicked the bone causing some fragments that were still coming out. He lost a lot of blood before they could get him squared away. One of the doctors told him that any more and he wouldn't have made it.

"Is the Colonel in?" Aaron asked the clerk.

"Yes, sir," he replied. "I'll let him know."

"Aaron!" a voice called. "Welcome back."

"Frank, it's good to see you."

Major Frank Scovill was the Air Exc. on base. Aaron and he had come over together in Spring, 1944. They were part of the very few that remained. "How's the leg?"

"Good enough."

"I heard you're going to be the new Operations Exc.. Going to be flying a desk for a while?"

Before he could answer, Colonel Logan stepped out of his office. "Williams, welcome back. Come on in."

"Yes, sir."

Colonel Logan was a big man who seemed to fill the room with his presence. He was unit's first Air Exc. and now was in command. He didn't play favorites and he could be blunt when he wanted.

"Welcome back, Williams. How's the leg?"

"Fine, sir."

"Good, good." The colonel replied. "Glad to have you on my staff."

"Happy to be here, sir."

"I'll get right to the point, Williams. You shouldn't be here. You should have been sent home. You don't really believe you'll fly again, do you?"

Just like Logan, right to the point. "That's the plan, sir."

"You have flown enough. 26, 27 missions? It doesn't matter. You earned it. Did you know the boys of your ship all have flown 30 missions and went home? All except Wilson. He stayed to help with the radar units we got."

"I believe I can be a help and get back in the air, sir."

The Colonel hmrrph. "We'll see." As he did, he pick up a newspaper and then dropped it on the desk. "Have you read the article? Damn good writing. Some talk of a Pulitzer or something."

Peter Smithson was the reporter who hitched a ride on "Tantalizing Takeoff" on Aaron's last mission. He wrote a 2-article piece about it that made it into the NY Times. From there it spread to every other newspaper. Aaron's name and story splashed across the nation, something that bothered him very much. As a result, he was promoted to Major and recommended for the Bronze Star and a DFC. An Army Public Relations idea, he thought. He wonder if that was behind Logan's comment about being sent home. 

How could he wear either medal as he was only doing his job, job that thousands of others were doing? A job on which 3 men died, 3 men who entrusted their lives to him.

"Yes, I've read it, sir. He tells a good story."

"Look, you came back at a good time. The weather is supposed to bad for the next couple days. Take your time learning the ropes. If you want, cut yourself a pass. You might want to unwind after being in the hospital so long."

"Yes, sir. I'll do that."

Aaron headed over to his new quarters. He now had a room to himself since he was on staff. Not much but enough room to stretch out and it included his own desk. His gear was on the cot and it was nice to see that his personal stuff had been saved. He knew how quick that got removed after an airman was gone from the unit. He began to sort through it.

He found a framed picture of "Tantalizing Takeoff" and the entire crew. He stared at it for a moment. He wished he had the men sign it but he didn't think of it at the time it was taken. He hung it on the wall. He dug out another.

It was a picture of Archer, Gilles, Martini, and him, standing together in front of their plane. It was taken the same day as the other. They looked like they didn't have a care in the world and were ready to take it on. Now 3 were dead and the other a cripple. How quickly things had changed.

Writing the letters home was the hardest part. He said all the right things but he really didn't know what to say. What he wanted to do was actually talk to them in person, to tell them how very sorry he was. He even wrote to Gilles' wife. Aaron couldn't tell her about what her husband was doing over here and he didn't let on that anyone knew about her affairs. What surprised him the most was he received a letter back from her, thanking him.

Though the letters to Gilles' wife and Martini's mother were hard, the one he wrote to Bill Archer's mom was the most difficult. How to do tell a mother that you could feel her son's life slipping away through one's fingers? That no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't save his best friend's life? Aaron felt he should have, maybe he could have done more. Like Gilles' wife, just last week he got a letter from Mrs. Archer. She said the letter was a comfort to her and she felt good knowing that such a good friend was by her son's side when he died. She also said that she saw the newspaper article but she couldn't force herself to read it. She said she pray for Aaron to make it home safely.

He knew that the letter was written to make him feel better but he still felt guilty, that somehow he let those men and their families down.

He hadn't seen Vicki in 2 months, since he was sent to a larger hospital. They wrote each other and twice they talked on the phone, only for a short while. There was a lot they needed to talk about. He wasn't sure when he was being released from the hospital so he never told her when he would be able to see her. Today was a good as ever. There was much he needed to discuss with her.

"Now you are sure you have my order?" 

"Yes, Mrs. Grayson." Vicki answered. "I have it all written down here." She heard the bell ring as another customer entered the store.

"When do you think you can have it delivered?"

Vicki looked over at a delivery chart she had taped to the counter. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught a glimpse of him. Her heart skipped a beat. She gasped.

"Well, when will it be delivered?" Mrs. Grayson drummed her fingers on the counter.

"Ah, ah," Vicki stuttered. "By Wednesday, Friday at the latest."

"Very well then. No later than Friday."

Vicki escorted Mrs. Grayson to the door. As the older lady left, Vicki locked the door, turned the closed sign, and pull down the shade. She rested her head briefly on the doorframe. Her heart was beating so hard than she needed to catch her breath. She turned.

Aaron was standing near the counter, smiling. "I was wondering if you have anything for a lady. I think something to say I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" she said, running to him. Vicki threw her arms around him. "Oh my love," she exclaimed. 

They kissed, a kiss of lovers too long apart.

"How I missed you. I have so many questions, so much to say, to ask," Suddenly she began to cry. "Don't look me. I told myself that I wouldn't let you see me cry, only smiles."

Aaron lifted her face and began to kiss her cheeks, her nose. He kissed her tears, tasting their saltiness. "Its alright," he whispered, "We'll have plenty of times for smiles."

"How long can you stay?"

"All night. Longer if you want."

She hugged him tighter as if she was never letting go.

Dinner was very awkward. Vicki's mother attempted to make small talk but it went nowhere. Vicki picked at her food while Aaron's effort was directed at keeping his mouth full so he won't have to talk. It was some sort of stew and Aaron didn't want to ask as to what kind of meat was in it. It might have been chicken.

"Victoria, you haven't touched your food. Are you feeling alright?" her mother asked.

"Yes mother," Vicki answered. How could she tell her that her stomach was in knots?

"You haven't said more than 3 words, Aaron. Didn't they feed you at the hospital?"

"They fed me very well, when I felt like eating. That first 2 weeks I must have lost 15 pounds but I have most of it back."

"I see you have a different insignia on your shoulders than the last time." Mother said.

"Yes," Aaron replied, "I'm now a major."

"Does that mean you won't be flying again?" 

"No, not really but I'm grounded until my leg heals."

"Perhaps the war will be over by then." She wiped her mouth with her napkin. "My, it is getting dark so much early. Vicki, be a dear, and clean up for me. I'm going up to bed and read. Good night." With that she rose and left the table.

Vicki and Aaron looked at each other and each began to laugh. "I'd thought she never leave," Aaron said.

"So did I," Vicki smiled. "Help me clear the table."

They grabbed the dishes and headed to the kitchen. "I'll fill the sink. You get the rest of the plates. Do you want some tea?"

Aaron got all the dishes and returned to the kitchen.

"Just set them down here." She handed him a towel.

Aaron stood behind Vicki and smiled. Her blonde hair fell to her shoulders and gently swayed as she moved her head. His eyes traveled down her back, noticing her waist and the flare of her hips. Her legs were finely toned and showed off the nylons Aaron had given her. She had kicked off her shoes and was moving her feet in time with the music coming from the radio.

He moved forward and placed his hands on her hips. He moved them slowly up her sides then down. He cupped her cheeks and gave them a squeeze. His hands moved around to her front and up to her breasts. There he stopped and held them.

The feel of his hands moving over her body caused Vicki to shiver as her skin seemed to tingle. She threw her head back and sighed.

Aaron slid his hands back down along her body. Reaching the hem of Vicki's dress, he lifted it, exposing her garters and lacy underwear. He pressed himself against her. He kissed her neck.

"Good Lord," Vicki thought as she gave out a low moan. She wanted him so badly, right here, right now. She grounded her pelvis into the sink. Aaron grasped her breasts and began to massage them, sending electric feelings through her body. 

"Oh, Aaron," she gasped. 

He spun her around and kissed her. Her lips parted and his tongue swirled in her mouth. She nibbled and tugged on his lips as her hands groped across his back.

Aaron picked her up and placed her, seated, on the counter. She spread her legs wide, inviting him between them. He didn't hesitate and move between them. He kissed her neck, moving down as he quickly undid the buttons of her blouse.

Suddenly Vicki pushed him back. "Aaron, stop," she said softly. "Wait."

Aaron gave her a confused look.

"Yes, I want you but not here, not like this," She pointed up and then put a finger to her lips. "Soon."

Vicki poured 2 cups of hot strong tea and they headed for the parlor. They sat on the couch. She curled up next to Aaron, her legs under her, her head against his shoulder. Aaron put his arm around her. "I could stay this way forever," she said softly.

"Vicki," Aaron said, "That's what I like to talk to you about."

"Oh." Vicki swung around and faced him.

"We, no I, need to talk."

"All right, go ahead." Vicki could see by the look in his eyes that he was serious.

"All I ever wanted to do was fly. That was all that matter. School came easy but I never really applied myself. Girls were easy come, easy go. I never got emotionally involved. I was having too much fun. Then the war came. I thought it was quite an opportunity for me. I would fly anything just as long as I could fly. Do you understand?"

Vicki nodded, "I think so. Go on."

"At first it was fun, flying a big B-17. Then I realized 9 other guys counted on me to get them there and back. It was my responsibility. Suddenly it wasn't fun and it was time to take things seriously."

"Don't blame yourself for what happen." Vicki held both his hands. "From what I hear, you did all you could."

"I don't but I think I have grown up since then. For the first time, I need to think about a future and be serious about it. Which brings up another problem, you."

"Me? Why am I a problem?"

"I never had a serious thought about any woman until I met you. Now you're all I think about. I know I'll never be able to fly again, at least not in this man's army and my future, well."

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Vicki straightened up.

He took her hands and slipped the sapphire ring they bought in London off her hand. "I love you and if you will take a "future isn't so bright" damaged man for your husband..."

Tears began to run down her face. "Oh, Love, it is I who is damage, not you. I married and lived with a man I didn't love for 4 years. Then when I found love I fought against the feelings. I really thought I never find love so I retreated inside. You changed all that. So yes, I will marry you."

Aaron slipped the ring onto her left hand and for a moment they looked at each other. They kissed, not a kiss heated by passion but one guided by love.

Vicki stood up and extended her hand. "Now, my love."

In Vicki's bedroom, she walked over to the nightstand and turn on the lamp. It cast a soft light upon the room. Returning to Aaron, she began to remove his shirt as they kissed. Slowly she removed it and rubbed her hands on his skin. It had been a long time.

Aaron undid her blouse and slid it from her shoulders. He lightly kissed her neck and her shoulders, taking small nibbles as he did. Vicki shook with excitement. He reached behind her and unzipped her skirt, causing to fall to the floor. He ran his hands over the silky fabric that covered her cheeks.

There was no hurrying tonight. Even though it had been over 2 months and both had ridden an emotional roller coaster, they acted as if time didn't matter and they were the only two people in the world. 

Vicki reached down and then pulled her chemise over her head, causing her breasts to fall free. Her nipples were hard and erect, aching to be touched, kissed, and loved. She cupped each one and offered them to him.

His whole being and senses were filled with her presence, her smell, her skin, her hair, her heart and soul. He began to gently kiss her. Her mouth, then her neck, her shoulders, slowly working to her breasts and nipples. While her kissing her, his hands were exploring the soft curves of her hips and legs. He moved his hands up to her breasts and started kissing his way down her body. Vicki reached her hands up and placed them over his, making him squeeze her breasts harder and roll her nipples between his fingers. Aaron's mouth reached her nipple and she moaned quietly.

He moved from one breast to the other, sucking it fully into his mouth. With his fingers, he teased the other nipple, still wet from his mouth. 

She could feel the wetness grow between her legs as the feelings grew more intense. She undid his belt and pulled down his pants. She pushed him back on to the bed and dropped to her knees. She removed his pants and shorts.

His cock was semi-erect and her hand moved towards it. Grasping it, she began to stroke it. She loved the feel of it and as it grew, she stroked it harder. Vicki bent over.

She gasped as she saw it. There in the soft light, she could see the ugly slash upon his thigh. It was purple and red, angry looking. "Oh, my dear, look what they have done to you," she softly exclaimed. "Oh my love."

She laid her head on his stomach and kissed him lightly. His erect cock nestled between her breasts.

Aaron placed his hands under her arms and tried to lift her up. She pushed him away. "No, just lay back and let me do the work," she said.

Vicki removed her panties and garters and climbed on to the bed. As she straddled him, he said, " Wait, the condoms are in my pants' pocket."

"Not tonight, my love. I want nothing between us. I want to feel all of you."

Vicki had made love to Robin for 4 years without ever using a condom. During that time, she never became pregnant, not even a false alarm. Now she wanted to express how much she loved Aaron by removing that last barrier. She wanted to feel all of him.

Aaron had never made love to any girl without using a condom. He could have said no but he didn't. By not using one, it was removing more than a physical barrier; emotionally he was finally making love.

She leaned down and planted a quick but firm kiss on his lips. Reaching down between her legs, she grabbed his hard cock and rubbed it along her wet opening. She pushed down. It slipped in easily and filled her completely. Vicki let out a low groan

She moved back and forth never letting his cock leave her. Occasionally she stopped and grounded against his crotch; then resumed moving back and forth. She felt completely filled as she clenched around his cock.

He placed his hands on her hips. "It feels too good," he moaned.

She moved faster, pounding him almost in a frenzy. She looked directly into his face.

His cock seemed to explode. He arched his back while pushing her hips down on to him. His head rolled and yelled, "Oh God, Vicki. Oh!" She felt his hot cum fill her up and spill out around his cock. To her own surprise, she came too. It was smooth and easy to take making it all the better. She fell on his chest.

Aaron wrapped his arms around her, refusing to let her go even as his cock slipped out her and their mixed juices flowed on to the bed. Vicki squirmed against his body. He could feel her heart beating on his chest.

He kissed her forehead and she sighed.

"Vicki, I love you," he whispered into her ear.

She smiled and sighed. It was a love that she knew was meant to be.



Meant To Be Ch. 08



"We're home, love."

I snuggled deeper into Nick, not wanting to wake up. He kissed my forehead and poked the tip of my nose. I opened an eye to look at him before gazing out the window of the cab.

"And your mobile's been buzzing," Nick added.

I stretched my arms over my head as the cab stopped at his building. Taking my phone out of my pocket, I saw several texts from Gwen. I read them while Nick and George got our bags, a frown growing on my face.

"What is it?" Nick asked as we walked through the lobby.

"I don't know," I told him. "It's Gwen - something must have happened but she doesn't say."

I knew there wouldn't be any reception in the elevator, so I fidgeted with my phone until we reached Nick's apartment.

"I'm sorry - do you mind if I call her?" I asked him anxiously.

"Of course not, love," he said, kissing my cheek.

"Gwen?" I said when she picked up, lying down on the loveseat facing the windows.

"Oh, Cass," she said in relief. "I'm so glad you're home."

"What's going on? Are you okay?"

"How was the trip?" Gwen asked in a tight voice.

"Gwen," I said firmly. "Talk to me."

"Well," she began. "The short version is that I fucked things up with Drew. I threw myself at him that night after my party - when he carried me into his guest room. God, Cass, I was relentless. I'm so embarrassed."

"Oh, hon," I said sympathetically. "I'm sure it wasn't that bad."

"Oh, it was bad. Worse than bad," Gwen said angrily. "He hasn't spoken to me since."

"Shit," I muttered. "I'm sorry. What exactly happened?"

There was a long pause before Gwen spoke.

"I - I don't know if I'm ready to get detailed. I just feel so stupid."

"Okay, we don't have to talk about it," I soothed. "We just got back to Nick's, but I can come home -"

"No, that's okay -"

"Gwen," I interrupted. "You don't sound like you want to be alone now. Besides, we're overdue for some girl time. And I brought you gifts from England."

She laughed. "Well, you don't have to rush back here. Though - well, I left part of my portfolio at Drew's that night and I haven't had the nerve to ask him for it. Do you still have his apartment key?"

"Yeah, I do," I remembered. "I have it with me. But what if he's there?"

"He's out of town this weekend - I heard him tell one of our professors. I was hoping you could ask him if we could go get it? Tell him I won't go into the apartment if it freaks him out or anything."

"I'll give him a call," I promised. "I'll call you back once I've talked to him."

Nick joined me and I relayed the news, my heart aching at how miserable my friend sounded.

"I'm sorry I'm going to have to kind of take off right after we got back," I said.

"I understand," Nick told me, slipping his arm around me.

I leaned against him, closing my eyes for a moment. Drew and I played phone tag for the next several hours before finally speaking.

"Aren't you in London?" he asked me.

"We just got back. Listen, Gwen left her portfolio at your place and wanted to know if it was okay for me to use the key you gave me for us to pick it up? I can leave the key there before I leave," I added, feeling awkward.

Drew hesitated before speaking. "How is she?"

"Uh -" I stalled. "She didn't really tell me what happened, just that she's embarrassed. And that you guys haven't spoken."

"Yeah," Drew said quietly.

"She said if you prefer she not come, I can pick it myself," I ventured.

"No, I don't mind if she's there," he said. There was another brief pause. "I miss her," he added in a low voice.

"Do - do you want me to tell her that?" I asked timidly.

"I want to see her," he said suddenly.

"Oh," I said in surprise.

"Look, I'm going to be back tonight, probably by nine. Do you think she'd wait at my place until I got home? Is that weird? Or presumptuous? I should probably go see her at her apartment," he went on as if talking to himself. He sighed. "Fuck, I am out of practice."

I stifled a giggle. "I can get her to wait at your place," I told him.

"Thanks, Cassie," he said in relief.

"Doing a little matchmaking?" Nick teased after the call ended.

"Hardly," I said with a laugh. "So, I've got to get his key to Gwen and convince her to wait in his apartment for him to come home. But we have time for dinner before then."

"Let's take Gwen out to dinner," Nick suggested. "Or bring some take away to your flat. She's probably a bundle of nerves."

"You're so sweet," I said, kissing him.

"I'm not that sweet - I'm just trying to prolong my time with you, darling." He winked at me. "Tell her if she doesn't want me around, though, I understand."

I ruffled his hair fondly before he stood, allowing myself the pleasure of watching him walk away before calling Gwen. She was grateful for the dinner suggestion but clearly hesitant about waiting at Drew's for him. I agreed to go along and wait with her. I saw when we got home with dinner that Nick was right; she was anxious and tense. We did our best to distract her with stories of our time in London, talking nonstop in the hopes that we could make her stop worrying.

When we got to Drew's, we all hovered awkwardly in his living room. Nick got a call from Abigail when she arrived in Chicago, but his phone kept cutting them off, so he excused himself to call her back from outside. Gwen was pacing back and forth in front of Drew's couch. Deciding he wouldn't mind, I found a beer in his fridge and handed it to her. I noticed her hands were shaking.

"It'll be okay, Gwen," I assured her. "He said he missed you."

"Cassie," she said in a small voice. "I basically yelled at him for brushing me off and turning me down. More than that - I yelled insults. I was out of control."

"He knows you were drunk, I'm sure he understands." I gave her a hug.

"I just don't know why I did it, drunk or not. I knew he wasn't interested, why did I think that tactic would work?" she said plaintively.

"Gwen, you're only freaking yourself out more right now," I said. "Stop beating yourself up about it. He misses you and wants to see you. I'm positive he didn't want you here so he could rehash that night."

We both looked at my phone when it chirped. I showed her Drew's text, saying he was a few minutes away.

"It'll be okay," I told her with another hug. "And I'll have my phone glued to my hand so you call or text me whenever, no matter how late. Okay?"

She nodded. "Thanks, Cassie."

I hugged her again, leaving her with his apartment key and going out to find Nick. The elevator was taking longer than usual so I decided to take the stairs and when I didn't see him outside, I wondered if he had gone back up to Drew's. I was just getting ready to call him when I saw Drew approach.

"She's upstairs," I said with a smile.

"Thanks," he said, looking somewhat nervous.

I couldn't help a smirk as he went inside. Somehow I had a feeling that Gwen and Drew were going to be more than okay. It was a cold evening but I was still jet-lagged so my movements were sluggish. I sat on the picnic bench outside the building, leaning back against the table and looking up at the sky. It had just occurred to me to call Nick to see what was taking him so long when my phone rang. I answered without looking at the caller ID.

"Cassie?" a frantic female voice said.

"Yeah?" I said, confused.

"It's Abigail. Is Nico with you?"

"Yes," I said instantly. "Well, I'm waiting for him outside a friend's apartment. Weren't you just talking to him?"

"I was and we got cut off - Cassie, it sounded like...I don't know, there was another voice. I heard Nico shout and then the line went dead."

A chill ran through me. "What?" I whispered, whipping my head around.

Just then I heard a shriek and looked up at Drew's building. The hairs on my neck stood up. There was smoke coming from one of the apartments. Large, billowing clouds of black smoke.

"Fuck, there's a fire," I said. "Abigail, I have to call 911."

I hung up without waiting for her response, but I was only able to dial the first two digits before I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned in relief, Nick's name on my lips. The chill returned when I saw Jason. There was a hard, blank look in his eyes.

"What -" I started.

He didn't let me finish. He clapped a hand over my mouth and wrapped his other arm around me, lifting me off the ground as he walked away from the building. I struggled and kicked at him but it wasn't doing any good. I somehow managed to keep my grip on my phone, trying to get a glimpse of the screen so I could finish dialing 911 but it was useless. I looked around to see where we were going but suddenly I was being shoved into the backseat of a car.

"Jason, what the fuck -" I yelled.

Jason moved too quickly for me to see him grab the knife, but in less than a second the cool blade was pressed against my neck. He leaned over me, speaking directly into my ear.

"Do not move or make a sound," he growled.

My arms had been pressed under me and I tucked the phone into the back of my jeans, praying he wouldn't look for it. Watching him with wide eyes, I nodded once and he removed his hand from my mouth.

"Now, we're finally going to have that talk," he said coolly.

I tried to think of something to say to appease him or distract him, but panic was making it difficult to breathe, much less speak. All I could focus on were his terrifyingly blank eyes and the pressure of the knife against my skin.

"We're going for a short ride," he told me, sounding almost conversational. "If you move or make a sound...well, let's just say it wouldn't be a good idea."

I nodded again. As soon as he closed the back door behind him, I scrambled for my phone. My eyes darted between the phone and the sight of him walking around the car to the driver's seat. I placed the call to 911 and hit the speaker button before shoving the phone back into my pocket. Jason turned to me briefly once he was behind the wheel and I hoped my jeans would muffle the operator's voice. 

Can they even track my phone? Or is that just something they show on TV? I wondered.

I tensed when I heard a distant voice on the phone, glancing at the back of Jason's head. He didn't move or seem to hear it. I nudged part of my phone out of my pocket and mentally crossed my fingers.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked, my voice squeaky with fear. "What's going on, Jason?"

"I told you not to speak," he said calmly.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I'm just - scared."

"You brought this on yourself," Jason told me. His voice still sounded eerily casual. "I gave you plenty of chances to talk to me, but no. You forced my hand, Cassie."

"I'm sorry," I repeated, tears spilling onto my cheeks.

Very slowly, I propped myself up slightly so I could see out the window, desperately looking for landmarks. The car slowed and my panic increased. I had a decent view out the window but couldn't concentrate on anything I saw. I forced myself to fight through the haze of fear as the car rolled to a stop, quickly reading the business signs in front of the car. Jason got out and I flipped to my stomach, pulling the phone out of my pocket.

"Jaime's pizza. Levinson Pharmacy. Franklin dry cleaners," I whispered frantically into the phone. "Please help me."

The phone was knocked to the floor of the car when Jason pulled me out. He covered my mouth again, his other hand holding the knife to my neck as he walked us into an alley. It was dark and deserted, the stuff of nightmares. I was surprised when Jason strode to the end of the alley instead of entering one of the buildings. I realized he probably hadn't planned this out in much detail. He shoved me against the brick wall and stood over me, pointing the knife at me.

I forced myself to keep my eyes open, blinking rapidly to fight off tears. Jason began speaking, a long diatribe listing all of the ways I'd wronged him. His cool facade was breaking and he was pacing, his voice becoming more heated. It was just as frightening as his casual demeanor, but I tried to take advantage of his break in eye contact to survey my surroundings. I knew I couldn't outrun him, but it seemed that it was an advantage that we were still out in the open, though I was technically trapped in this alley.

I was just trying to decide if I would be able to kick the knife out of his hand when he stopped in front of me. Resting one hand on the wall, he leaned into me, running the knife's pointed tip lightly down my cheek. I flinched, moving my head away instinctively.

"Jason, I'm so sorry that I hurt you," I whispered. "But you don't have to do this."

He sneered, seeing right through my attempts to placate him.

"Shut up," he growled.

He trailed the knife down my neck, flicking the blade against each coat button so casually it was terrifying. My coat hung open and he dragged the knife to the neckline of my shirt. I didn't have time to react before he sliced easily through the fabric, cutting it down the middle. With another flick of his knife, he cut away the center portion of my bra. He stepped back to stare at me, bared open to him. I closed my eyes in terror, my arms instinctively covering myself. I heard a step and my eyes flew open. He shoved my arms away and leaned in, gripping one of my breasts.

Do something, I told myself. Kick him. Move. Run. Something.

I couldn't decide quickly enough what my best option was, so I remained frozen as he pressed his body to mine. He pinched my breast roughly and I jumped. I could feel him watching my face closely and I told myself not to give him the satisfaction of a response. I looked around for his knife hand, still trying to assess the best way to get it away from him.

His fingers dug painfully into my breast then moved down my body. I squirmed when I felt him undoing my pants. The icy tip of the knife blade pricked my neck and I let out a whimpered protest. He forced his hand inside my underwear and I began begging him to stop. Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried to formulate a plan.

It was hopeless. I was hopeless. A single tear rolled down my cheek as I gave in to the wretchedness of my situation.

---

So deep in my despair, it took me a second to register that the chilly night air whipping around me meant his body was no longer against mine. I looked around numbly and saw two bodies tumbling across the ground near my feet. I saw the silvery flash of the knife blade and heard a piercing, hysterical scream. It might have been my scream; I couldn't tell. Then there were several pairs of feet pounding down the alley and voices shouting. I slid down the wall and everything went black.

I was being shaken. Then lifted from the ground. There were voices, but they were far away. I couldn't open my eyes.

"Cassandra. Cassandra!"

Nick. My eyes snapped open and I saw his face inches from mine. His face was ghostly pale and there was blood drying on one side of his face. His eyes were full of anguish.

"Nick," I whispered, then immediately burst into tears.

He crushed me to him. It took me a minute to realize he was walking as he carried me. I heard more voices. When I felt another set of hands on me I panicked and began struggling, bucking wildly in Nick's arms.

"Cassandra, it's the paramedic," I heard Nick say. "They need to check you."

"No!" I shrieked, my arms flailing.

Nick sat down with me in his arms. I heard him speaking but couldn't comprehend the words. He wrapped his arms around me, pinning my arms to my sides. Trapping my legs between his, he tightened his hold, making soothing sounds until I stopped struggling.

"Pet, they're going to check you now," Nick said gently, stroking my hair. "I'll be right here the whole time, I promise. No one's going to hurt you."

I studied his face for a long time before nodding in resignation. He helped me to my feet and I gripped his hand. The paramedic began to lead me to the back of the ambulance and I pulled Nick with me.

"Don't let go," I demanded vehemently. "I don't care what they have to do. Do not let go of my hand."

I saw Nick exchange a look with the paramedic before they both turned to me. I could only imagine what I looked like - wide-eyed and frantic. I didn't care. I honestly believed I would lose my mind if Nick let go of my hand.

"Can you let go long enough to put this on?" the paramedic asked me quietly, holding up a scrubs top.

I glanced down and was reminded of my ripped shirt and bra. I nodded sullenly, too paralyzed to be embarrassed. I slipped the top on and Nick instantly took my hand. We sat next to each other in the ambulance, each with our own paramedic tending to us. When they were finished, we sat on the curb answering an officer's questions.

The sequence of events started to fall into place as I listened to Nick and the officers. Apparently when Jason had followed me to Drew's the day before Gwen's party, he'd assumed we were dating. The policeman speculated he'd been waiting for us to be there together again. He knocked Nick out when he was outside on the phone, likely to avoid having a witness and not because he suspected Nick knew me. He set a fire in Drew's apartment, barricading the door with Gwen inside. Drew managed to pull her out but she was in the hospital suffering from minor burns and smoke inhalation.

The officer believed Jason expected me to be in the apartment and when he'd discovered me outside, he'd impulsively grabbed me. Nick had regained consciousness in time to see Jason shoving me into the car. Fortuitously, one of Drew's neighbors arrived at that moment and saw the same thing. She called the police and let Nick take her car to follow us. He arrived just before the police, tackling Jason moments before the officers got there. I simply nodded repeatedly as all of the information reached my ears, still too dazed to really digest any of it.

One of them drove us to Nick's, where we brushed aside George's look of concern and finally entered the sanctuary of the apartment, our hands still tightly clasped. We stood in a stupor, staring into the room.

"Gwen," I said suddenly. "I need to see her -"

"Drew and her parents are with her," Nick said. "The paramedics said she'll be fine. We'll go tomorrow."

"Wait - Drew - his apartment -" I stammered.

"I gave him my key to your flat if he needs a place to stay - I didn't think you would mind," Nick murmured.

"Of course not," I whispered. "Thank you." My lips began trembling. "God, all of his work -"

"I'm certain he's not concerned with that," Nick assured me.

I nodded faintly. It was impossible to process everything.

"Abigail!" I cried out. "I was on the phone with her when I saw the smoke -"

"I texted her to let her know we were all right," Nick told me, pulling me into his embrace. "I'll ring her tomorrow, but she knows we're fine."

My whimper was muffled as my face was pressed into his shirt. He smelled of smoke and sweat.

"Darling, why don't you take a shower?" he suggested. "I'll make some tea."

My body sagged against his and I nodded in relief. A shower did sound good, though I wasn't sure I had the energy to stand. Nick led me to the bathroom and turned on the water, pausing to ask if I could manage before giving me privacy. I undressed slowly, my limbs aching. Looking down at the ripped shirt and bra in my hands, my stomach lurched and I stumbled to the toilet, expecting to be sick, but nothing came up. I shoved the ruined clothes into the trashcan, piling toilet paper on the top so I didn't have to see them. I got under the hot stream, standing there until I began to get dizzy. Sinking to my knees, I hugged myself and waited to feel clean. I jumped at movement on the other side of the glass door. Nick opened it a crack and gave me a worried look when he saw me seated on the shower floor. I just stared at him.




Meant To Be Ch. 08



He removed his clothes quickly and stepped in beside me, lifting me to sit on the small ledge in the shower stall. He carefully washed my limbs and body, then shampooed my hair with gentle massaging motions until I finally felt the tension fading. I traced the bruise on his forehead lightly and he gave me a tremulous smile. He washed himself quickly, rinsing us both off, then wrapped me in a large towel. He carried me to the bed but I stiffened in panic when he started to lower me onto it.

"I'm just going to get the tea, love," he said softly.

"Don't leave me," I implored.

I hated how weak I sounded, how helpless I felt. I didn't know what to do about it other than maintain some physical contact with him, so afraid that without him as my anchor I would be adrift forever.

"Okay," he whispered, carrying me into the kitchen.

How he managed to prepare and serve the tea while holding my hand or with one arm around me at all times, I don't know. He did it, though, and we slowly walked back to the bedroom with our mugs. He tucked me in and climbed in next to me, holding me securely. I vaguely remembered him taking my half-finished cup when my head began wobbling. I woke up several times in the night, startled awake by some dream or spark of memory of the evening's events. Each time he was still wrapped around me and would whisper soothing words until I drifted back into a restless sleep.

When I woke up and saw that it was early morning, I didn't allow myself to go back to sleep. Nick was breathing deeply, still holding me securely, and I just lay there watching him until he woke up. There were circles under his eyes but his features were relaxed. I studied each line and angle of his face, the soft curve of his lips, the dark hair tumbling over his forehead. His eyes fluttered open and he looked puzzled for a moment to find me watching him.

"How do you feel?" he croaked.

I gave a small shrug, but smiled at him.

"You saved me," I whispered.

A shadow crossed his face and his gaze faltered. I ran a finger along his bottom lip.

"I love you," I said.

His lips curved into a tentative, pained smile and he tucked me into him. "I love you, too, pet."

We moved slowly, getting up and getting dressed. Nick made breakfast but I couldn't eat much of it, despite his many entreaties. We took a cab to the hospital, our hands joined. I saw Gwen's parents as soon as we stepped off the elevator. Doug and Ellen had been like second parents to me for so many years, and the sight of them huddled together in the hallway made my heart drop. They looked up at the sound of us walking toward them, and Ellen made a beeline for me, catching me in her arms.

"Christ, Cassie -" she said, her voice breaking. "I'm so glad you're okay."

I felt another set of arms around both of us and heard Doug murmur his agreement.

"How's Gwen?" I asked when they released me.

"She's going to be fine," Ellen said. "How are you?"

"I'm okay," I said quietly. "This is Nick," I added, reached around for his hand. "Gwen's parents," I told him. "Doug and Ellen."

They exchanged subdued pleasantries before Ellen pointed us in the direction of Gwen's room. Nick and I slowly pushed the door open, trying to be quiet. I stopped short at the sight that greeted us. Drew was sitting on a chair next to Gwen's bed, leaning to her so closely their heads were almost touching. One hand was gently stroking her hair, the other resting on her bed, his fingers laced with hers. He was looking at her tenderly, and there was a small smile on her lips. We paused in the doorway, not wanting to interrupt. They saw the movement of the door and turned to us simultaneously, wearing matching smiles of exhaustion and happiness.

I returned the smile, tears springing to my eyes. Hurrying to her side, I tried unsuccessfully to blink away the tears.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered to both of them. "I'm so sorry he did this."

"It's not your fault, dummy," Gwen rasped, her voice weak and hoarse from the smoke. She grabbed my hand. "Are you okay?"

I nodded. "You? How bad is it?" I asked anxiously, looking over her body. She had bandages on her arms and across her cheek.

"It's fine," she said.

"Do you need anything?" I was quickly losing my battle at keeping the panic at bay.

"Just sit with me for a minute," she said, squeezing my hand. She glanced at Nick and Drew. "Do you guys mind...?"

Nick kissed my temple and Drew gave her hand a squeeze before they left us alone.

"Gwen," I whispered in agony, dropping into the chair. "I am so sorry."

"It's okay, Cass," she said firmly. "Really. Please stop worrying about me. What about you - what did he - what happened? No one's told me anything."

I shook my head, the tears overflowing. I lowered my head to rest on our joined hands.

"It's fine, he didn't have the chance to really do anything."

"That fucker," Gwen muttered, patting my head.

She let me weep until I was able to stop, at which point I realized she was crying silently. I sat gingerly next to her and hugged her. The men returned to find us like that, both sniffing and shuddering slightly from the after effects of our tears. We didn't stay long; Gwen insisted we all go home and rest, including Drew. Her parents crowded around her bed as the three of us left.

"Can we do anything?" I asked Drew as we exited the hospital.

"No, but thank you," he said. "I'm going back to my place to check out the damage."

"Do you want us to come with you?" I offered.

"That's okay. But after that - if it's okay - I was thinking I'd go to your apartment? I could really use a shower."

"Of course," I said quickly. "I'm going to be at Nick's, but make yourself at home. And call me if you can't find anything, or whatever."

"Thanks, " Drew said with a smile.

"I'm really sorry," I repeated.

"Cassie, it's not your fault," he said sincerely.

Nick's hand was on my back and I felt him increase pressure, a silent confirmation of Drew's words. I nodded glumly, knowing now matter how much I heard the words I wouldn't believe it. We were silent for the entire journey back to Nick's. He deposited me on the couch and started rummaging through my suitcase, which was still lying on the living room floor.

"I thought we could just watch the telly and relax," he said, sifting through my clothes.

"Okay," I murmured.

He knelt next to me and held out a pair of yoga pants and a lightweight sweater. I couldn't help the smirk that twitched on my lips. I shook my head at the clothes and he lowered his hands. I wiggled out of my jeans and shirt, unhooking my bra and slipping it out from under my tank top.

"Come here," I said sleepily, patting the couch.

Nick shucked his pants and shirt and curled up next to me.

"I'm so sorry this happened, love," he said softly, his voice uncertain.

I shrugged. "Me, too."

"Do you want to talk about -"

"No," I interrupted quietly. "Not now - not yet."

"Okay," he said in a soft breath.

He slipped his arms around me and I gripped his hands, squeezing my eyes shut as if that were enough to block out the waking nightmare that was suddenly my life.



Meant to Be Ch. 09



It was April in England and spring was in the air. The air was growing milder and flowers were beginning to bloom. Vicki thought back. A year ago, she was resigned to a life that to her was a dead end. She was living with her mother in a small town running a flower shop. She was a war widow with no potential prospects on the horizon. Then a chance meeting ended all that. 

Aaron Williams was everything she dreamed of. She fought against the feelings she had for him in the beginning. It was more out of fear of being in love and not loved back. Her first love wasn't all she thought it would be. She made a vow not to be disappointed again. She fought the feeling hard but since she finally realized that to fight it was foolish, she couldn't remember being so happy. Aaron and she planned to be married when the war ended and all indications were it wouldn't be long. They had talked about returning to The States and starting their life together there. Foremost in her mind was she hoped to start a family and all that entailed.

Aaron had been very busy since Christmas but the fact was he hadn't flown since his injury. Vicki prayed each night that he never would fly again. She knew how much it pained him not too but she had made it clear how much worry it caused her. They had numerous talks about it usually around the fact that Aaron felt he wasn't doing his bit. She felt he had and still was in his present position. No, it wasn't flying but he was playing an important part. Vicki felt that he was resigned to the fact that the Army wasn't going to let him pilot any plane and he admitted that just being a passenger wasn't the same thing.

Major Williams found himself in demand as his reputation began to grow. It was discovered that Aaron could take multiple reports and data and summarize them quickly in clear and concise language. He had been to SHAEF to meet with the brass a few times. Col. Logan brought him along to make presentations or to explain results of past operations. It seems to have come naturally to him and the higher ups respected his findings. On one occasion, he accompanied Gen. Arnold to a conference with RAF Bomber Command. He got to witness first hand "Bomber" Harris and the dealings and differences between the AAF and RAF.

He had some dealings with British airman and came to realize they were no different than Americans. One thing that amazed him was how easily they embraced night bombing. They thought that the Yanks were crazy to bomb in broad daylight and he felt they were nuts to fly at night. Aaron wanted to see what was coming at him. They invited him on a few missions but each time he turned them down, claiming he wasn't cleared yet. He justified it to himself by thinking that Vicki would be upset. He knew that wasn't true. If he wasn't the pilot, there was no way he would be on a plane flying in the pitch dark.

Vicki had been able to meet him a number of times as he traveled to London. The more time he spent with her the more he understood why he was in love with her. She was beautiful, smart, and witty. Their moods and personalities fit perfectly. Aaron was unable to describe how fantastic their lovemaking was. Vicki had grown bolder, more confident and showed a willingness to let herself go. He asked her one night as they lay together, catching their breath, what caused this. She thought for a moment and said, "You."

Aaron grew more and more restless. He planned the operations and watch the bombers take off each morning and return. He gathered their reports and prepared outstanding briefings to those above. He felt like a starting pitcher who got his team to the pennant and then the manager sat him down for the World Series. The war was ending. Any one could see it and he wanted one more chance. He would swallow his pride and hitch a ride. He didn't need to tell Vicki. It would be over before she knew. He knew he have to tell her but after he got back.

The mission he picked was an easy one. It wasn't a milk run but the Luftwaffe was a shell of itself and the fighters were doing an excellent job of keeping what did come up off the bombers back. Aaron had taken after battle reports of jet and rocket-type fighters hitting the formation and he was curious to see them first hand. He wanted to witness what they were reporting.

The squadron he picked was flying B-24s so this would be the first time he flew in one. He heard that it was a beast to fly but the pilot in him made him want to see this himself. So he picked out one and walked over to crew.

"Lieutenant, I'm Major Williams. I'd like to ride along with you today."

"Sure, Major. Glad to have you along." The lieutenant couldn't have been more than 20. Aaron thought back. He must have looked like that when he first got to England.

The takeoff felt different than a 17's. It was difficult to determine from where he was but it definitely had more power and a higher takeoff speed. It climbed differently too. Not better or worst, just different.

As they reached altitude and winged over the Channel, Aaron climbed up to the cockpit. "How many missions?"

"12, sir." 

Suddenly the twin .50s of the top turret fired off a burst. Aaron jumped not expecting it. The other gunners fired off theirs, each one clearing their weapons. Each one reported that they were clear and ready.

Aaron stood back out of the way. He watched the pilot and co-pilot go through their routine. There was very little chatter on the intercom and the roar of the big four engines made it impossible to talk so he settled back.

As he did he glanced out a side window. He noticed a stream of liquid streaming from behind one of the engines. There also seemed to be a bulge, a bubble growing there. He was not familiar with the B-24 but he was damn sure that wasn't right. He knew they were prone to fires in the engine so he moved to the cockpit.

Tapping the pilot on the shoulder, he pointed towards the wing. "What's with that?" he yelled over the engine noise.

The pilot looked and then spoke into his intercom. Aaron could hear a mumbled reply. The lieutenant gave a thumb up.

Aaron was not reassured. The bulge seemed to grow bigger as he watch it. An inner voice told him it was time to get out. He grabbed his chute, hooked it on and waddled to the rear. As he passed the other crew members, he pointed to the wing. They didn't seem concerned and they gave him a look as why should they.

He made his way to the bomb bay. The doors were already open and as he looked down he could see the green gray water of the English Channel. He knew they be crossing on to the continent in just a few seconds. If he waited, he be over land. The bigger question was if he should jump? If he did and the plane continued on, he never live it down. If he didn't jump and the plane did explode...

Suddenly a huge explosion ripped through the air.

Vicki was an ocean of emotions. She couldn't remember being so angry. She was mad at Aaron and mad at being so angry. She was relieved, hurt, and confused. She wanted to see him but then again she didn't. She was also worried, worried about his reaction, worried about the result.

Aaron entered the house, hung his jacket, and walked into parlor. Vicki was standing with her back to him. He crossed the room and put his hands on her shoulders. She shrugged him off and stepped away.

Without turning, she said, "How could you?"

"How could I what," he replied, knowing full well where this was going.

"How could you what?" she exclaimed as she spun around. Aaron could hear the anger in her voice. Her eyes seemed to flash. "You lied to me. You said you wouldn't fly again. Yet you did!"

"Hey, I never said I wouldn't fly again. Just I wouldn't be a pilot again."

"I suppose that is true but you know what you told me. Then when you do, you can't even tell me."

"Look, Vicki, I'm in the Army Air Force and I'm supposed to fly. There is a war on, you know?"

Vicki's anger grew. "Don't talk to me like I'm a little child! You selfish bastard, it's all about you. Are you trying to get killed?"

"Of course not!" Aaron moved towards her.

"No, no," she said shaking her head. "I don't care. Get killed. Go down in flames to a glorious death." She had reached the point in her argument that she was so upset she couldn't think or speak straight. Nothing made sense.

When she reached this point in any argument with Robin, he would look at her with a smug smile and leave for the officers' club. The arguments didn't end; they just died a quiet death.

But Aaron wasn't Robin. "I'm not going to die. I'm not going to leave you. Do you understand that?"

"How do you know that? You're going to live forever?" She was so mad; tears were running down her cheeks. "Go, leave me alone!" She struck him, hitting his chest with her two fists. She tried to hit him again.

Aaron grabbed her wrists and pushed her hands to her sides. The look in his face frightened her. "You're hurting me!" she said with a tremble in her voice.

He let go but wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly to him. She tried to push him away, without success. Suddenly he kissed her. It was hard and forceful. Again she tried to push him away but failed. He continued to kiss her. Vicki found her lips parting, yielding to him.

All the pent up emotions flooded over her. She couldn't stop herself nor did she try. Minutes ago she had so angry at him that if he left it would have been fine. Now she never wanted him to leave.

She kissed him back and began unbuttoning his shirt. She was frantic. Her hands were shaking. The first then the second was unbuttoned. Aaron's hands caressed her back, moving over it.

She started kissing his neck and chest. She was undoing the buttons as fast as she could. It was killing her to have the shirt between them. As she got it halfway done she pressed herself against him. She could feel his warmth but she shivered as she rubbed on his chest. 

Aaron reached under her dress and grabbed hold of her panties. In one swift motion, he pulled forcefully, causing them to fall to her feet. Vicki gasped as she felt the cool air on her skin.

"Oh, Aaron," she said showering his with kisses. "My love."

He turned her and pushed her over the arm of the sofa. He spread her legs apart. Vicki waited, anticipating his cock. He rubbed the head of his cock in her slit. He slid in effortlessly and began to stroke in and out. Vicki let out a long satisfied moan.

"Oh,oh,oh," she moaned over and over again. Aaron wasn't gentle as he entered her. It hurt a little but it felt exquisite. Despite it he was moving deliciously in and out. Her clit rubbed against the sofa arm with each stroke, adding to her excitement. She pushed back and grounded into him each time he entered her. She could feel her orgasm building. 

Aaron's breathing picked up and he pushed even harder into her. A low growl worked its way up into his throat. His hands grabbed her hips tightly.

Vicki knew he was coming. She felt him pulsing, shooting deep inside her. The thought of him filling her sent her over the edge. Her mouth opened but no sound came forth. She pushed her clit into the sofa and arched her back. Her hips shivered harder than she could remember. She buried her face into the couch as she came. 

"So are you going to tell me?" Vicki asked. They had moved to her room to continue their lovemaking and were lying under the covers, recovering their strength. Vicki rested her head on his chest.

"Do you really want to know?"

'Yes, Aaron, I do. Please tell me."

"I was getting upset with myself. Here I was gathering all these reports from men who were actually doing something but you know that. So I decided to see for myself what they were telling me. I picked an easy mission; one I figured I satisfy my guilt."

"Why do you feel guilty?" she said, making small circles with her finger on his chest. "You have done enough."

Aaron sighed. "I can't explain. We were over the Channel, no enemy in sight. I noticed gasoline leaking from one the engine and bulge in the wing. In one of many briefings I attended they mentioned this about a B-24 and fire. A voice in my head said 'Get out.' I grab my chute and was standing in the open bomb bay, looking at the Channel below, debating whether to jump or not."

Vicki pushed off his chest and propped herself on her elbow. "A voice?" she asked.

"Yes," he replied. "Don't know where it came from but I was standing there, debating. Suddenly there was bright flash. I found myself in the air, above the plane. It was upside down and one wing was on fire. I guess the wing exploded, flipped the plane, and the force threw me clear. I pulled the cord and floated down, landing on the beach, about 100 yards from the water. The rest I think you know."

"Major Scovill called and told me that you were shot down but were safe. You have no idea how mad, how upset I was."

"I know," Aaron smiled.

"Weren't you frightened?" 

"No, but I was worried."

"Worried about what? Landing in the Channel?"

Aaron pulled her on top of him. "No, I was worried about how I was going to explain this to you and how I was going to make it up to you."

"You were? Then you better start right now." They both laughed.



Meant To Be Ch. 09



The week simultaneously sped by and dragged on. I stayed at Nick's; Drew was staying at our apartment, which was a convenient excuse, but really it was that I couldn't bear the thought of leaving. I never asked and thankfully Nick didn't seem to expect me to go. My emotions ranged from numbness to crippling fear to panic. I almost preferred the dullness since any other emotion drove me to tears.

We returned to work after a few days. Nick shaved his beard before his first day back while I sat on the bathroom vanity watching. I unexpectedly burst into tears when he was halfway through the process, causing him to hug me in alarm. The ridiculousness of my reaction struck me and I began laughing through my tears, almost hyperventilating as I tried to catch my breath. The moment represented the dramatic shifts taking place inside me perfectly.

Gwen was released from the hospital and spent a few days recuperating at her parents' house before returning to our apartment. The one silver lining of this nightmare was the relationship between her and Drew. She told me he'd confessed that he hadn't been able to decide what he wanted, which made him believe he wasn't ready for anything other than friendship. But once he'd seen she was trapped in his apartment as it burned, once he was faced with the prospect of losing her, the decision had been made. I teased them about living together so soon into their relationship although I knew they were taking things slowly as Gwen recovered. I was happy for them, but my joy and teasing felt hollow and forced to me.

Nick and I coexisted in almost perpetual silence, moving around each other quietly and communicating through random touches and caresses. I guessed he was giving me space to heal. I saw the stress and worry etched on his handsome face, the way his shoulders hunched forward slightly as if he was carrying a heavy burden. I assured myself that once I recovered, his concern for me would disappear.

My parents flew out that week despite my telling them it wasn't necessary. Abigail and Louise called almost daily to check on me, and Louise gently chided me, explaining that for parents, it was necessary to see their children after something like this. My heart ached for her, acknowledging how difficult it must be for her to be so far away from Nick during all this.

Gwen's parents invited my mom and dad to Newark during their visit but my dad declined, asking Mom if she'd mind going alone so he and I could spend the day together. I was still so numb I could barely manage the energy to be surprised, but I tried to respond with enthusiasm. Fake it till you make it, right? 

Dad and I had lunch and wandered around the West Village. I pointed out various landmarks in a flat voice - places we regularly shopped or ate, even the gym Gwen and I belonged to - trying to give him a sense of my life in New York. He paused outside the gym and asked if we could go in. My surprise was genuine at this request, but I followed him inside. I introduced him to the staff working the front desk, not paying attention to their small talk until I heard my father ask about personal trainers. My head shot up to look at him quizzically.

"Do any of them do self-defense classes?" he asked.

My face flushed, though I wasn't sure if with embarrassment or anger.

"None of our trainers, but we do offer the occasional class. They're not taught by anyone on staff, it's usually ex-policemen or military personnel," was the reply.

My dad nodded his thanks and moved further down the counter under the guise of looking at their brochures. His hand held my elbow and he nudged me along with him.

"Cassie, would you be interested in some self-defense classes? I'll pay for them," he said quietly, studying a brochure.

"Why?" I said, unable to stop the hurt in my voice. "Do you think I could have prevented what happened?"

He dropped the brochure and grasped my shoulders. I looked up to see his shocked expression. He walked us to the chairs in the waiting area and sat me down.

"Not at all," he said decisively. "That's not what I meant, I'm sorry, princess."

I nodded, hearing the sincerity in his voice.

"I just think it might be good for you, to take some control back. I think it would help you recover. Emotionally," he added.

"Maybe," I agreed half-heartedly.

At dinner my father floated the idea to the table and my mom and Nick readily agreed. Dad had gotten the names of some of the instructors while we were at the gym and he called them right after the meal.

"One of them does private sessions," he told me. "Would you prefer that?"

I shrugged, not knowing how I felt about any of it.

"You could have them come here," Nick offered. "Rather than the gym. It might be more comfortable for you."

I glanced around the room, absorbing the various concerned looks directed at me. Suddenly I was irritated by the delicacy with which I was being handled, the eggshells everyone seemed to be walking on around me. I knew it wasn't fair to be annoyed and bit my tongue, not wanting to lash out at them. 

"Is it - is it a man?" I asked quietly, staring at my lap.

Everything in the room stilled. In my peripheral vision, I saw my mother's hands clasp together tightly in her lap.

"Uh - yes," my father replied.

I bit my lip. "Can you...can we arrange it so Nick will be here?" I whispered.

I sensed their heads turning to face each other, but they didn't speak.

"Of course, pet," Nick said softly.

I nodded. "Thanks."

---

My instructor, Scott, was a tall, imposing former Navy Seal who never smiled. To say I found him intimidating would be an understatement. He wasn't disagreeable or harsh, just deliberate and professional. He was calm when he demonstrated each defense move, almost unemotional when describing the potentially scary scenario that would require it. He took his instruction seriously and I did my best to respond accordingly. Sometimes, especially at first, the memories of that night overpowered everything else.

I wasn't sure how much my father had told Scott about what happened, but he didn't seem fazed the first time I broke down in tears. He'd just demonstrated how I should escape from his hold, and as soon as he stood behind me I felt myself wavering, losing my already tenuous control over my emotions. By the time he placed his hands on me, I was shaking and gulping for air. He released me in an instant and silently handed me a bottle of water.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, wiping the tears away.

I perched on the couch and glanced up at him. He was standing stock still with his hands clasped behind his back, looking straight ahead. He gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head.

"Not a problem," he said briskly.

His detachment was a relief compared to the way everyone else had been treating me - overly concerned and with kid gloves. I sighed and stood up.

"Okay. Let's try it again," I said.

We met three times a week and I soon began looking forward to our sessions. I became more comfortable being alone with him, which relieved the strain on Nick's work schedule, though he did his best to be home for them when he could manage it. I still broke down on occasion, and the times it happened were all the more frustrating because there never seemed to be any warning. I was embarrassed by it, feeling it made me seem weak. One day I was so irritated with my tears that I tore my hand wraps off and flung them across the room.

"Fucking hell!" I shouted, sitting on the armrest of the couch. I kicked at the couch with the heel of my shoe several times for good measure.

"Feel better?" Scott asked after a long pause.

His voice was so calm that I chuckled, though without much humor. He was once again standing still as if he'd been given an 'at ease' command.

"Are you...required to stand like that?" I asked timidly. "I mean, can you sit?"

A flicker of amusement crossed his face and he relaxed his frame, dropping his hands to his sides but otherwise not moving.

"Force of habit," he explained.

I nodded. "I'm sorry I keep crying," I said quietly.

"It's understandable," he said.

I snorted. "Is it? Because I feel like I'm losing my mind."

"I'd say you're doing pretty well, considering," he told me, surprising me by sitting on the floor.

"My dad told you," I remarked in a hollow voice.

"Yes."

I nodded again, staring at the floor.

"Ms. Drake, the goal here is to make your responses to any attack rote. So you can defend yourself without thinking. Like how you go through the motions of driving or brushing your teeth without having to think about each step - soon it will become second nature. It takes time and practice, and focus. If you like we can work on breathing exercises beforehand to clear your mind and that may prevent the emotional response."

I stared at him. It was the most he'd said to me at one time other than our first meeting where he explained his process.

"That might help," I said. "And you can call me Cassie."

He looked so startled that I snickered.

"Or, Ms. Drake is fine, if you're going to freak out about it," I joked.

He made a sound that I supposed was his version of a laugh, and I grinned. I turned to the door as I heard Nick come in. Scott stood immediately, his hands automatically linking behind his back.

"Hi," I said softly, walking to the door.

"Hello, love," Nick said warmly, kissing my cheek. "Scott," he added with a nod. "Did I interrupt?"

I shrugged. "We were taking a tear-induced break, I guess."

Nick brushed a thumb across my cheek, looking at me with concern. I smiled reassuringly. Scott began gathering his things.

"Let's cut this session short," he said. "We can make up the time on Tuesday."

The breathing exercises worked. I still had moments where I'd feel myself wavering on the brink of tears, but by now Scott seemed able to read my body language. He would calmly remind me to breathe and focus. He didn't push me, but I also knew he wouldn't let me make any excuses. I was still rather intimidated by him and for some reason didn't want to disappoint him. A few weeks later, he complimented my progress as he was leaving and I thanked him somewhat doubtfully.

"Do you really believe that any of this would help me - I mean, if I was up against someone your size. Or even half your size," I added with a laugh. "Would it really work?"

"I do," he said decisively. "But a good thing to remember is that attackers don't usually expect someone to fight back. In the majority of cases, even the attempt of defending yourself will either throw them off guard so that you can escape, or cause them to reevaluate whether or not they want to bother continuing."

"Hm," I said, thinking about his reply. "What happened to me, though - it was...personal. I don't know if he would have been discouraged by me fighting back."

"But you don't have to worry about him anymore," Scott said firmly.

I studied him, wondering if he and my father had kept up their communication. Jason was still incarcerated and we'd been informed that he plead guilty. We expected him to remain locked up for quite some time, though he hadn't been sentenced yet. His attorney was attempting an insanity defense and the process was dragged out while Jason underwent a mental health evaluation.

"Do you think -" I hesitated uncertainly. "Can we go through what he did, step by step? If I describe what happened, can you maybe show me how I could have gotten away at some point?"

Scott watched me carefully for a minute.

"Why?" he finally asked.

"I think it might help me not beat myself up over it anymore. Maybe make me stop reliving it, or at least if I'm going to relive it, I can change the outcome in my head or something...I don't know," I said in frustration. "That's probably stupid."

"You did everything right, Cassie," Scott told me.

I was taken aback, partly that he'd used my first name, but mostly at his declaration. He nodded.

"You called 911 and immediately let them know that you were being held against your will. You kept your wits about you enough to take note of your surroundings so you could give them clues about where you were. You did everything right," he repeated.

I swayed slightly, feeling light-headed. I reached behind me to grab the back of a dining room chair. Relief unexpectedly washed over me. I knew Scott would never have said it if it weren't true. I hadn't realized how much I needed to hear those words until now.

Scott agreed to recreate the night of Jason's attack. It wasn't easy emotionally, but eventually I reacted more on instinct than fear and began to feel empowered. My father was more intuitive than I had ever given him credit for, and I called him the first chance I could to thank him for this gift.

The darkness lifted slowly, but it did lift. I found myself going through my day with confidence as opposed to dread. Scott and I cut back our sessions but I refused to give them up entirely yet, unwilling to lose the lifeline I felt it provided. I knew I was healing; I felt better and people were commenting on it. I became more comfortable being alone in public, giving Nick and my friends a reprieve from chaperoning me to and from work. I returned to my apartment once Drew found a new place to live, though I still spent most of my time at Nick's.

So focused on the progression of my recovery, it took me a while to notice that Nick was still withdrawn and pensive. He remained supportive, of course. Tender and loving - though we hadn't been intimate in weeks - buoying my spirits and taking care of me. As my fog dissipated, I expected his mood to improve, and selfishly didn't spend too much time pondering it. One night he was in the kitchen cleaning up our dinner dishes and I walked in to get something to drink. He had left me tucked in on the couch studying and hadn't heard me enter. The water was running in the sink, but he wasn't washing the dishes. His hands gripped the edge of the counter and his head was bowed. The lines of his shoulders and arms reflected tension and fatigue.

My stomach tilted and I felt a brief moment of dizziness. This happened to him, too, I realized. I was ashamed by my lack of empathy. He jumped slightly when I stepped behind him and circled my arms around his waist. He covered my hands with one of his own.

"Are you okay?" I asked gently.

"I'm fine, love," he said crisply, clearing his throat.

"Nick," I said, nudging his waist. "Look at me."

He turned to face me and I saw a mask slip over the pain in his eyes, leaving an almost blank expression.

"I've been neglecting you," I whispered.

He looked at me in shock. "What? No, you haven't," he protested.

"I have. And I'm sorry," I told him. "I'm so sorry. You've been so wonderful, taking care of me through all this. I've been too selfish to notice that you're going through this, too."

"Cassandra," he said with a resigned sigh. "You are not selfish. You're healing. Christ - what happened to you -"

"It happened to us," I interrupted. "And you're still hurting. What can I do?"

"Nothing, pet. I'm fine," he said weakly.

I studied him for a few minutes, trying to figure out what to say.

"Nick," I said slowly. "We're in this together. If this is going to work then you need to let yourself be vulnerable with me. I love you. I want to take care of you, too."

I leaned away slightly, running my hands over his chest down his torso until they rested low on his hips.

"And I miss you," I added pointedly.

His jaw muscles worked furiously as he swallowed hard. His expression was inscrutable.

"I'm not going to push you," I whispered. "But I hope you'll let me be there for you like you've been there for me. Otherwise this is just one-sided and that's not fair to either of us."

He didn't respond and my heart fell. But, I had promised not to push him and I was going to keep my word. I rose up on my toes to brush my lips against his.

"I'm going to bed," I told him.

My chin wobbled as I fought back tears and I left the room quickly. It was relatively early, but exhaustion was a constant companion to me these days and I fell asleep quickly. I woke up with a start and looked around the room in confusion. It was well past midnight and I was still alone. Stamping down my frustration, I got up in search of Nick. He was sitting on the loveseat with his head flung back. I stood watching him for several minutes, not sure if I should approach him. He sat up and leaned over, resting his arms on his legs. I saw his shoulders heave and his hand brush over his eyes and realized he was crying. I was at his side in an instant.

"Sweetheart," I murmured, hugging him.

He made a strangled sound deep in his throat.

"Go back to bed, love," he told me.

"Come with me," I pleaded.

"I'll be right behind you." His jaw clenched and he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Nick," I whispered.

"I'll be right in, I promise," he said in a tight voice. "Please go, Cassandra."

I turned and rushed back to the bedroom, tears blurring my vision. I fell asleep before Nick came to bed.

---

I did my best not to nag or prod Nick, but I knew he felt my worried gazes. I became desperate with fear that he was pulling away, that I was losing him. He was as attentive as ever but now that I had seen the depth of his pain, it felt like a charade. Logically I knew there was no way to force him to open up to me but I still tried to think of something. I even went so far as to ask Abigail to speak with him, thinking he might share something - anything - with her, but she found him to be just as buttoned up during their conversations.

After an almost silent dinner later that week, Nick was cleaning up in the kitchen and I wandered toward the window with a cup of tea. My eye fell on his drafting table and I walked over to look at his latest sketches. Shifting the pages around almost guiltily, feeling like I was intruding on his most private thoughts, I searched for his latest drawings. I saw quickly that he hadn't completed anything recently. The few he had begun were more angry scrawls than anything else. A sharp pain shot through me.

It was a struggle to concentrate on school. My professors had been gracious and lenient, allowing me to take incompletes since the incident with Jason occurred right before the end of the semester. I had until the end of spring term to finish everything, but I just wanted to get it done, so I plowed through. My work was uncharacteristically mediocre and even more surprising was that I didn't care. My heart wasn't in it; I still loved books and libraries, still believed in the world of possibilities and the potential for learning that they provided. I knew it was important in the abstract; I just wasn't sure it was my path anymore. I felt the urge to do something more useful, but what exactly that was, I didn't know.

Feeling hopeless as I stopped by my apartment one night after I finished my last class. I was packing up some things to take to Nick's and unloaded on Gwen without meaning to. We checked in with each other daily but hadn't been able to have a real conversation in almost a week.

"I just don't know what to do," I said. "He won't talk to me about it."

"I think you need to be more forceful," she said. "Call him on it."

"Really? It seems so - harsh. I don't think I would have responded to that very well," I told her.

"Well, you've tried the hands off approach and that's not working," she pointed out.

I nodded, deciding to change the subject and asked her about Drew. She sighed dreamily and I grinned.

"I think I love him," she whispered, looking scared.

"I think you do, too," I said, still grinning.

"How do I know? For sure?" she asked helplessly. "How did you know?"

I thought about her question for a long time, knowing she didn't expect me to answer but that she hoped I would. I had never bothered to put it into words, the knowledge of how right it felt had always been explanation enough for me.




Meant To Be Ch. 09



"It's like...he's the best part of me," I said softly. "It's not in that cheesy Hollywood movie way where you feel like someone completes you or makes you whole...I don't feel like I need him to make me happy or complete, more like he just fits - we fit. We complement each other, like real partners. It's like being with him makes me free, if that makes sense. Free to be whatever I want, achieve whatever I want - he doesn't hold me back and isn't responsible for my happiness. Maybe it's that he's able to make me see myself through his eyes and realize what I'm capable of..."

I trailed off and glanced at Gwen to see her looking at me intently, listening closely to each word. 

"And there's the trust," I continued. "I can totally be myself with him, and it's always okay. He sees the good and bad and it's all part of who I am, and there's only acceptance. Like there's nothing I could do that could change how he feels about me, so I don't have to hold anything back. And the same goes for him - even when he broke up with me I never stopped loving him. Even when I hated what he'd done and hated that he freaked out over our age difference, I never hated him. It was what happened but it didn't change the way I felt about him."

I was staring into the distance as if in a trance. After a pause I blinked slowly and focused on Gwen. She was nodding slowly, a small smile on her lips. She met my eyes and grinned.

"Don't be mad if I'm a little grateful that you dated a psychopath who started a fire and got Drew to realize he wanted to be with me," Gwen said, only half-joking.

I burst into laughter.

---

I got back to Nick's feeling better; talking to Gwen hadn't solved my problems but articulating how special Nick was to me made me optimistic that we could get through this. I let myself in, looking behind me to pick up my bag with the clothes and toiletries I had packed. The door was pulled open and I turned in surprise to see Nick looking relieved.

"Thank God," he breathed. "I was worried about you," he said.

"I told you I was stopping at home to get some stuff," I replied, puzzled.

"I know..." he trailed off, taking the suitcase from me. "I was still worried. I would have picked you up," he added.

"It's okay," I said quietly. "You can't escort me everywhere, after all. It's just not practical." I smiled, trying to keep my voice light and teasing.

"I certainly can," he said quickly, putting his arms around me.

"Nick, it's okay," I repeated, hugging him.

He let out a long exhale, resting his chin on my head.

"Darling, if you had any idea - I close my eyes and see you there, in that alley...it was my worst nightmare come to life -" His voice broke and his entire body shuddered.

I shut my eyes in pain, wanting to reassure him but not wanting to interrupt if he was finally opening up to me.

"It's over now," I whispered when he didn't continue. There was another long silence and I squeezed him. "Talk to me," I urged.

"No, it's all right. I'm fine, love," he said briskly.

I didn't believe him but remained silent, moving my hands in small circles on his back in an attempt to relieve the tension I felt in his muscles. He released me and I cleared my expression, not wanting him to see my disappointment. I made dinner while he finished up on some work, and watched him as we ate, making random small talk. Finally I sighed and put my fork down.

"I need to talk to you about something," I said suddenly. "I need your advice."

Nick look surprised, but nodded encouragingly.

"I'm thinking I should take time off from school. I was barely able to get through these last classes," I admitted.

"It's understandable," Nick said sympathetically.

"I guess," I said, nodding. "But it's more than that - I just don't know if it's what I want to do anymore."

"Oh?" Nick put his silverware down and gave me his full attention.

"It seems - trivial now, for some reason. Does that make sense?"

"Well," he began. "Yes. I mean, I understand why you feel that way, but I don't want you to think I ever thought it was trivial to begin with." He smiled self-consciously.

"I know," I said, smirking. "And I don't necessarily think it's trivial, either - just maybe it's not for me. I'm a different person now."

A haunted expression crossed Nick's face and I bit my lip.

"It's not a bad thing. I like who I am now," I said softly.

He nodded hesitantly, still looking uneasy.

"Nick -" I said desperately, reaching a hand to him. "Is there anything I can do? Anything you want to talk about?"

"Don't worry about me, love," he said, shaking his head.

My heart sank but he took my hand in his and squeezed, reassuring me a little.

"I don't mean to make it sound like I'm unhappy," I told him. "I'm not. I'm incredibly happy."

Except for you being in so much pain and not talking to me about it, I added silently.

"I hope so," he said under his breath.

"I am," I said vehemently. "I'm very happy. This is just - a career plan crisis, I guess."

"I know," he said in a voice that sounded uncertain. "So," he continued, giving his head a slight shake. "Do you have any ideas of what you might like to do instead?"

"I don't know," I mused. "I feel like I want to make more of a difference than information sciences. Maybe counseling," I added quietly, giving the recent idea a voice for the first time.

He squeezed my fingers again. "You would be excellent at that."

"You think so?" I asked.

"I do," he replied, sounding more sure about anything he'd said in weeks. "Think of all the people you could help - you would be wonderful at it."

I smiled gratefully, tightening my grip on his hand.

"NYU has a program, I assume?" He released my hand and picked up his fork.

I nodded, watching as his posture assumed the relaxed, confident state of what felt like ages ago.

"I haven't looked into it," I said as I began eating again. "So I don't know the specifics of the program, but I know there is one. It's a popular field, I'm sure there are programs all over the world. Like London," I added carefully, not looking at him.

I saw his hands stop moving and could feel him looking at me but I couldn't bring myself to make eye contact.

"London?" he said, his voice sounding purposely careful.

"Mm-hm," I murmured, trying to seem nonchalant.

There was a long silence during which I kept my eyes lowered. The only sounds were our silverware against the plates. When I finally snuck a glance at him, he was concentrating on his food. His shoulders were hunched forward slightly and there was a furrow between his brows. I pressed my lips together and pushed my plate away.

"Nick?" I whispered.

He looked up expectantly.

"I love you," I said quietly, staring at him.

He looked stricken and got up to kneel next to my chair, wrapping his arm around my waist.

"I love you, pet," he murmured. "I hope you know that."

I nodded, running a finger across the worry line on his forehead. I did know it. I reminded myself to trust in that and give him time.

"I'll do the dishes," he said, kissing my forehead.

I asked him to watch a movie with me once he was done and as we snuggled up together on the couch, it almost felt like it used to. I could sense his underlying mood hadn't changed, but he held me closely and his body responded to our proximity. I shifted my hips to press against him but he either didn't notice or chose not to take advantage of my subtle offer.

I must have fallen asleep during the movie because I woke up in bed, alone. It was almost eleven, still earlier than when Nick came to bed, especially lately, but I got up to look for him anyway. He was standing behind the loveseat, his hands resting on the back cushion, staring out the windows. I stopped halfway there, studying him. His head moved and I knew he'd seen my reflection, but he didn't turn. I climbed onto the loveseat to face him and covered his hands with mine. At this angle I could see his face clearly. His eyes were dry but his cheeks were streaked with tears.

"Nick," I whispered in agony.

"I'm sorry, pet," he said in a broken voice.

"You don't have anything to apologize for," I said, tugging on his hand. "Please sit with me."

He reluctantly sat down and I gathered him in my arms, his head resting on my chest. I stroked his hair, feeling him let out a shuddering breath.

"You can talk to me, you know," I murmured.

"I can't burden you," he said harshly. "I've already put you through too much."

"What are you talking about?" I exclaimed.

"None of this would have happened if I hadn't been a bloody idiot who let you go in the first place," he spat out. "You never would have met him, never would have gone out with him...he never would have - would have -"

My heart clenched as his words registered. In all of my wondering about what he was going through, this particular scenario hadn't crossed my mind. That he held himself responsible for all of the events that occurred simply because we had broken up...I both understood and was baffled by it. I suddenly remembered Ian's words and realized Nick had been carrying this since long before Jason's attack; he had been blaming himself since he'd first learned about Jason when we got back together.

"It's all my fault this happened," he was saying. "If I had just accepted - if I hadn't pushed you away...I could have lost you and I would only have myself to blame -"

"Nick," I interrupted loudly, squeezing him with my arms. "Stop it. Stop that right now. You didn't do anything. You didn't cause any of this to happen. Jason's a fucking crazy person. And that's not your doing."

He pulled away from me, frustration replacing the pain and regret in his eyes.

"It's true," I said sharply. "Please don't beat yourself up for it. If we hadn't had that time apart, you wouldn't have realized we belong together. If we hadn't been apart, we wouldn't have what we have now. And I wouldn't give up what we have for anything." I cupped his face. "Anything," I repeated. "Would you?" I asked, my voice dropping to a whisper.

"No, I wouldn't," he said quietly, not meeting my eyes. "I just wish I could go back and tell myself not to be such a complete tosser."

I tried not to chuckle. No matter how often I heard it, whenever British slang fell from his lips I still found it - him - adorably charming.

"We can't go back," I told him. "We can't change what happened, so there's no point in dwelling on it and making yourself miserable. We're together. We're healthy. We love each other. Don't spoil the future because you're fixating on things from the past that you can't change."

Nick let out a long, shaky breath. Leaning back, he pulled me to his chest, tilting my face up to look into my eyes.

"When did you get so wise?" he asked.

I smiled warmly at the affection in his eyes, relieved to see the pain gone even if it might only be temporary.

"I have always been wise," I said haughtily. "I am an old soul. And you should listen to me."

He gave a small laugh, stroking my hair.

"I will, and gladly. Though, I don't know if it will be easy for me to just move on and let it go," he admitted.

"I get it," I murmured. "But I'll be here to help you, if you'll let me."

He pressed his lips against my forehead and I sighed, feeling the warmth spread through me.

"Promise?" he mumbled.

"I'm not going anywhere," I replied, slipping my arms around him.

A large breath escaped him, the tension being expelled almost palpable. My chest tightened as it occurred to me that he might have doubted that. I sat up to look at him.

"Were you worried I wasn't going to stick around or something?" I asked curiously.

He looked at me sadly. "Perhaps. Not because I doubt how you feel about me," he added quickly. "It's just -"

"Because I'm so much younger," I interrupted.

I was matter-of-fact, no longer frustrated by his concern over our age difference. He nodded self-consciously.

"It doesn't bother me anymore - it's not that," he said.

"But you feel like it might matter...to me, maybe? At some point?" I guessed.

"I suppose."

I took his hand, lacing our fingers together.

"Would you rather find someone closer to your age?" I asked directly.

He inhaled sharply. "No, pet. You're the woman I love. There couldn't be anyone else."

I rested my head on his shoulder, leaning my head back to look at him.

"And that's how I feel about you, silly," I said. "We belong together. It would be true if you were twenty or fifty or seventy. And you're just going to have to accept it because I love you and I'm not going anywhere no matter how much you freak out about being older than me."

He smiled, the corners of his eyes wrinkling and I returned the smile.

"I should have discussed this with you much sooner," he told me apologetically, giving me a hug. "I'm sorry if I've been difficult."

"Well," I said, shrugging dismissively. "Just remember that in the future. I'll always be here for you. You don't need to hold things back from me."

"I don't know how I got so lucky," he said, running a finger along my cheek.

"We both got lucky," I said simply.

He chuckled, nudging my head to rest in the crook of his neck, stroking my fingers where our hands joined. My body absorbed his warmth and I sighed, feeling my breath quicken at the simple caress of his hands.

"Speaking of getting lucky," I said softly, kissing his neck.

Turning to face him, I sat up on my knees and cupped his cheeks, caressing his lips with mine. His hands rested on my waist, his fingers kneading my back. I slipped my hands under his shirt and he tensed slightly. I stopped moving but kept my lips a millimeter from his, opening my eyes to look at him. He blinked slowly, warmth and affection shining in his eyes.

"Move in with me," he whispered.



Meant to Be Ch. 10



Standing on the railroad platform, Vicki was terrified. She held tightly onto Aaron's arm, dreading what was next. Here in a small southern Pennsylvania town, she would be meeting Aaron's parents, Thomas and Edna Williams and his sister, Casey, for the first time. She who had met European elite as Robin's wife now trembled as she waited.

Aaron and she got married less than a month ago. He promised he would when the war ended and he kept his word. They waited until the end of June as the Army wanted a little more from him. He had enough points so it wasn't a problem plus it was easy to get the right papers when you knew the right people. It was a small ceremony in front of the local justice of the peace with her mother and Major Scovill as witnesses. Aaron booked passage on a small liner and they left England bound for New York City and then on to Pennsylvania. The voyage was smooth and quick with the only problem being Vicki starting each morning seasick. As the day wore on she felt better but then the next morning she awoke feeling queasy.

Aaron didn't allow her any time to be sick once they reached New York. It was a whirlwind of events. He took her to all the places including The Statue of Liberty, the top of the Empire State Building, Times Square, and Central Park. He even arraigned two tickets to see the hit Broadway show Carousel and the second night to have dinner at one of New York's hottest night clubs. As they returned to their room they were exhausted but never too tired to make love.

It was obvious to anyone who cared to see, Aaron and Vicki were deeply in love. Both were enjoying each other whether making love, walking the streets of NYC, or in the middle of a crowded nightclub. Aaron felt for the first time in his life he had focus. Vicki had found what she always wanted, real love.

"So what do you think of America?" Aaron asked Vicki as their train traveled across New Jersey and into to Pennsylvania.

"It is much more than I dreamed of," she replied. "It's bigger, brighter, and life is definitely faster. I'm a little overwhelmed."

"I'm sorry," he said putting his arm around her. "I'm afraid we did quite a lot since we arrived. Things will begin to slow down real soon, as soon as we get home. I promise. Are you feeling OK?"

"Just a little tired." Vicki stretched in her seat. "And a little nervous."

"Don't be. Everything will work out fine. You'll see."

Vicki was more than a little nervous. She hoped to make a good impression and was pretty sure she would. But what if she didn't? They hadn't seen their son in three years and now he returns with a wife, a foreigner, and an older woman. So many things could go wrong. Her stomach already unsteady gave another flip.

So here they were, stepping down from the train. The moment she dreaded was here. They looked around. "They should be here," Aaron said. "I wired them what train."

"Uncle A!" a young boy shouted running towards them.

"Hey Rocky!"

The boy threw his arms around Aaron's waist. "Am I glad to see you. How was it? Wow! A major! Did you bring back any souvenirs?"

"Hey, slow down. I want you met somebody." Aaron held the boy's hand. "Vicki, this Rocky, er Walter, my cousin. Walter this is Vicki, my wife."

"Pleased to meet, ma'am. You can call me Rocky. Everybody does." He held out his hand.

Vicki took it. "Pleased to meet you, Rocky. You may call me Vicki."

Rocky looked at Aaron. "She talks funny. Come on let's go." He began to pull Aaron along.

"Whoa, Slow down, Sport."

Together they walked rather quickly down the platform. Standing there, waiting for their son and his new wife were the Williams. Vicki grasped Aaron's arm tighter and she took a deep breath.

There was a brief moment when everyone stood and looked at each other. Then his sister Casey threw her arms around his neck. "I'm so glad you're safe!" She stepped back, embarrassed, tears running down her cheeks.

Aaron's dad was next. Vicki could see where Aaron got his looks and height. He extended his hand. "Son," he said with the look of pride. Aaron took it firmly. "Dad."

Finally there was his mother. Edna Williams was standing there, dressed in her Sunday best. She was a stout woman with her gray flecked hair pulled back in a bun, and steel rimmed glasses. Even though her eyes were filled with tears, you could see by the lines around them that she was a woman who enjoyed life. Her smile at this time said it all as she looked at her son. She was bursting with joy.

"Mother." Aaron put his arms around her and hugged. She held him tight then like her daughter, she seemed embarrassed by this public display. She let him go.

Now was the moment Vicki had gotten herself ready for. She tensed up, waiting.

"Mom, Dad, Casey," Aaron began. He had thought over just what he was going to say. "This is Vicki, my bride, my love." Turning to Vicki, he said, "Vicki, this is my family."

Vicki nodded and smiled. "Pleased to meet you. Aaron has told me so much about you. I feel I already know you."

Mom looked her over and smiled. Holding her arms wide, she said, "Welcome to the family!" With that she pulled Vicki close and gave her a big hug. That simple move seemed to break the tenseness. Everyone began talking at once, laughing, patting Aaron the back, and shaking Vicki's hand. 

"Son," Dad said. "Let's go see about those bags. We'll meet them at the car."

As they walked down the platform and out of earshot, Aaron asked, "Well, what do think about her, Dad."

His father looked back over his shoulder. He could see the three women talking. "I think she'll do," he laughed, "but you know who really matters."

Aaron looked back. "What do you think Mom will think?"

"Personally, I think you have nothing to worry about. From what you wrote us about Vicki, I think she'll fit right in."

The ride home went quickly. Vicki, Aaron, and Casey squeezed into the back of the '37 Ford. Rocky sat up front between Mom and Dad but kept turning around, asking a ton of questions. Aaron let him wear his hat and the boy loved it.

"I hope you don't mind, son, but a few people are at the house," his mom said as they entered the driveway.

A few! It seemed like half the town was there. Family, friends, and more were there to greet them. "Mother, I thought I said we just wanted a quiet time,"

"Well, son," Dad said, "Its not often that we get a real hero coming home."

As the car stopped, the people gathered around the car. When Aaron stepped out, they began to pat him on the back and escort him away from the car. It seemed everyone wanted to greet him, to say welcomed back. He turned and attempted to go to the car to get Vicki but there were too many. He vanished into the crowd.

Vicki sat alone in the back seat not sure what to do. A voice calmly called her. It was Aaron's mother. "Come, my dear," she said. "I'll introduce you to everyone. You must be starved."

Mrs. Williams took Vicki by the arm and brought her around. To everyone they met, she introduced her as my new daughter. She never left Vicki's side as they walked. The more people they met, the more relaxed Vicki became. She also realized her new mother-in-law was doing all she could to make it easier for her.

She was amazed at the food that was available. There was cole slaw and potato salad; sliced turkey and smoked ham; apple and blueberry pies spread out on large wooden table. To drink there was homemade wine and potent applejack. 

"Fill your plate, dear."

Vicki hadn't seen this much food in four years. She stood looking not sure where to start.

"All the food is local, from our gardens or the nearby farmers." Mom explained. "Sugar is hard to get but we get by." She put her arm around Vicki's waist. "My, you are skin and bones. We'll take care of that."

After Vicki filled her plate, Mom invited her into the house. She took her into the kitchen where they sat down.

"Quite a crowd, isn't it? Well, they are just happy to see Aaron again. All the women wanted to meet you too. They were interested in who was the lucky girl who landed him. You know, I think Aaron was the lucky one." She reached out and rested her hand on Vicki's knee.

Vicki put her folk down and looked down. "Thank you, Mrs. Williams."

"Oh no, that won't do. Call me mom or Edna. Mrs. Williams won't do."

"All right. Mom."

"That's better. Come on, I want to show you the rest of the house."

Aaron's mother showed her around the house and then upstairs. "This was Aaron's room but Tom and I thought you would stay here until you found a place." She opened the door. "The bed was Aaron's grandparents. We moved it in here. We couldn't let you two sleep in his small one."

"It's very nice," Vicki said, sitting on it.

Mom sat next to her. "I don't want to be one of those know it all mothers but you know how they say 'the way to man's heart is through his stomach'." She looked around as if looking if anyone was listening. She patted Vicki on the knee and winked. "There is another way."

Vicki looked at her. They both smiled and then began to laugh. Yes, they would get along just fine.

The next morning Aaron came down for breakfast. He could smell the eggs and his mother's scrapple. It had been a long time. He kissed his mother on the cheek. "That smells great," he said. "Morning, Mom, Dad."

"Good morning. Where is Vicki?" Mom asked.

"She'll be down soon. Her stomach is a little upset."

"Really?"

"Yeah. First it was a little seasickness, then all that rushing around and rich food in New York, then she was really nervous about meeting everyone plus she ate a lot of food yesterday. She'll be alright."

"What are your plans today?" Dad asked.

"I thought I take the car and show Vicki the area. It is suppose to be hot so I figured we go over to Rock Creek and have a picnic. Take some Cokes and leftovers." 

"Sounds good. Just remember that gas is rationed here so don't go to far."

Vicki entered the kitchen and sat down. "Good morning, everyone."

"Good morning, Vicki," Mom said. "Feeling better?" The look she gave her seemed to ask more.

"Yes, much better. It is just all the excitement."

Aaron kissed her. "If you feel up to it, I thought I show you around the neighborhood and then go on a picnic, just you and me."

"I'd like that."

Around 11, Aaron and Vicki headed out. They placed the picnic basket filled with yesterday's leftovers in the back seat of his Dad's car and drove downtown. Vicki slid over next to him and Aaron put his arm around her. It brought back his high school days when he drove his Model A to the dance. Only this was so much better.

He showed her the town center, the high school, the town's only 5 & 10 store. They parked and walked over to the town green, hand in hand. Along the way, folks said hello and welcomed him home. Vicki was surprised as to the number. It seemed every one knew him. He explained that, just like in England, in a small town, everybody knew everybody and there were no secrets. 

"I bet they know all about you now, after yesterday." 

"Really?"

"One of those many people you met was Mrs. Mullins, the town busybody. Any one who wasn't there has heard about it from her."

"I met so many yesterday that I can't remember everyone. I hope I made a good impression with her."

"Don't worry. You did fine." He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Come on, let's go have that picnic."

He took her to a very private area just out of town along Rock Creek. They parked a few yards away and walked to the spot. It was a wide deep pool with rocks along the edge. The creek tumbled over the large rocks before it entered the smooth waters of the pool. The spot Aaron consisted of a large ledge that tapered down to water's edge. Tall oak and beech trees surrounded this side of the creek while across it was open field. Despite the trees and the shade they created, most of the rock was bathed in sunlight. The site was very secluded with only the rushing water and occasional birds disrupting the silence.

Aaron spread the blanket on the rock and opened the basket. He took one Coke and handed it to Vicki. Keeping one for himself, he placed the other two in the creek. As he walked back, she was taking out the food and spreading it out.

"I can't believe all this food!" she said. "I'm truly amazed." In the basket was some of the cole slaw, potato salad, cold turkey and half of loaf of his mother's bread. She shook her head. "You know what your mother said?"

"No, what?"

"She said I was skin and bones. I think she wants to fatten me up!"

Aaron dropped down next to her. Putting his arm around her, he eased her down on the blanket. "You're great just the way you are." They kissed and held each other, just enjoying the moment.

The two of them sat and talked about yesterday. Aaron apologized for leaving her alone most of the time. Vicki said it really didn't matter as it gave her a good chance to get to know his mother. Vicki asked more questions about a number of people she met as she thought her first impressions might be wrong. After she explained herself, Aaron laughed. Almost in all cases she had formed the right idea. Overall, she told him it went better than she thought it would.

"Does it always get this warm?" she asked.

"About 3 or 4 times in the summer. We could go swimming to cool off."

"We could," she answered, "but I don't have a suit."

"Who needs one," Aaron said standing up and removing his shirt. "We could skinny-dip."

"What do you mean, skinny-dip?"

He looked at her. "Swim naked. Don't tell me you never have."

She shook her head. "No."

"Well, it is time you did. Come on, no one is looking." He swung his arm around.

Vicki slowly stood up and began to remove her dress. She felt that she was doing something dangerous, naughty. Her heart began to race as she laid her dress aside and began to remove her under garments. Aaron was already naked and in the water. "What if someone sees us?" she asked.

"No one will. Who cares?" he waved to her. "The water is great."

Vicki stood naked on the rock and gave one final look around. She ran to water and dove quickly in. Aaron was right, the water felt great. Not only that, she felt incredibly free. Swimming naked in the cool water created feelings she never felt. It seemed as if only the two of them were on this earth and the world was theirs.

She looked around for Aaron. She wanted to tell him how great it felt but where was he? She began to call out his name, "Aaron, Aaron, where are you?"

Suddenly she felt something grab her around her waist and she screamed. Aaron broke surface right front of her and laughed.

Vicki said with a hint of anger in her voice, "Don't do that! You frightened me."

"I'm sorry."

"Well, don't do it again." With that, she splashed water in his face and began swim away. "You can't catch me!" she said over her shoulder.

Aaron shook the water from his face and took off after her. Quickly he caught her and spun her around in his arms. Vicki put her hands on his chest and tried to push away. "No! no!" she said laughing.

"Gotcha and you're not going anywhere." He was laughing too.

They stopped and looked at each other. Aaron kissed her and her lips yielded to him. She sucked on his tongue and bit his lip. They pulled each other closer as Vicki wrapped her legs around his waist. It was if they couldn't get close enough

"You're shivering. Come on, let's get out." Aaron said.

They swam to the rock and Aaron got her a towel. He rubbed her down and dried her off. He went and got his towel. As he turned, he looked at Vicki. The sun was behind her and silhouetted her. It caused a rainbow as she shook her blonde hair and the water drops flew. He stared.

"My God, she is beautiful," he thought. "Her breasts are perfect and firm; her waist narrow and her hips flare with a blonde patch between her thighs. How he loved her."

Vicki dropped onto the blanket beside Aaron. She kissed him then rolled onto her back. She could feel the heat of sun warming her body and it felt good. She wished that day would never end. It was perfect. 

She felt Aaron's lips on her nipple. He sucked and nibbled on it, sending electric tingles between her legs. She sighed and spread her legs.

"Aaron, honey."

He lifted his head.

"I need to tell you something," she said.

"OK, go ahead."

"I don't think it was seasickness, or rich food, or nerves that has been making me sick in the morning."

Aaron now concerned got up on his knees. "What is it?"

"I missed my last period and now I'm late again. I think I'm pregnant." 

"How?'

"How?" I think you know how. At least you're pretty good at it," she laughed.

"No,no. Remember you said that you and Robin..."

"I guess it wasn't me who was the problem."

"Oh Wow! This is great, fantastic. What should I do? Here, you should get dressed." Aaron started reaching for her clothes.

"Aaron, calm down. I'm not made of china. I won't break." She reached up and caressed his face. " I want you to make love to me right now." She spread her legs.

Aaron looked into her face and understood. He moved over her. Vicki reached down and guided him into her. Despite the coolness of their bodies from swimming, he could feel her heat. Slowly Aaron began to move in and out.

Vicki wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him deeper. "Faster," she pleaded. He moved faster, going deeper with each stroke. Vicki moaned loudly, grabbing his ass. "Yes, oh yes!" she said.

She could feel the pressure within building, demanding release. No longer caring, she yelled, "Oh God," as she came.

So underneath the warm sun, on a ledge near Rock Creek, two people, deeply in love, made passionate, meaningful love.

Dr. Aaron Williams looked across his backyard. He had done pretty well in the last 18 years. He was a full professor at the local college and the author of quite few books on English History. He had a nice house, a number of friends, and most important a great family. 

There was his oldest daughter, Katie, talking to one of her friends over by the picnic table. She had her mother's looks and grace. Next year she would off to college, majoring in journalism. She was a great writer having won a few awards for it. 

Over by the cold drinks was Lydia. She was the middle child and the tomboy of the family. Where Katie got great grades, to Lydia it was sports. She lettered in 3 varsity sports and still had two more years of high school left. She definitely had her Dad's athletic skills but like Katie, she got her Mom's looks. Aaron considered that a blessing.

Then there was Tom. Named after his late grandfather, Tom was a spitting image of his dad. Not only that but he did very well in school and on the playing field. He was lucky enough to get the best traits from both his parents.

Aaron was very proud of his family.

"All right, everybody, gather round," Vicki shouted to the group. Still after all these years, she still kept a part of her accent.

The occasion was Aaron's 40th birthday. He didn't want a party and he even threatened to stay away. Vicki convinced him that it was his children's idea and he couldn't let them down so here he was.

Lydia started it off. Standing next to the picnic table, she addressed the group of Aaron's closest friends and family. Aaron wondered what was going to happen.

"I've known my Dad all my life," she began and everyone laughed. "But there is a lot I didn't know about him. One weekend Katie and I were in the attic and found a trunk so being curious we opened it. It was full of Dad's Army uniform and stuff. We spent the afternoon going through it. Now don't get mad, Dad. We asked Mom if it was alright and she said it was."

Aaron gave Vicki a dirty look who just smiled back.

"We found out that our Dad met General Eisenhower and there was a picture of the two together. How cool is that! We thought he should have it on display so Katie wrote to the General and asked if he would autograph it. Well, Dad, he did and here it is, signed and framed."




Meant To Be Ch. 10



My head jerked back involuntarily. I stared at him, blinking in surprise. He smiled softly.

"I want you here with me, always. And it's not because I worry for you and want to protect you, though that's part of it."

He twisted a strand of my hair in his fingers, searching my eyes.

"I want to wake up with you every morning. I want your clothes in the closets and drawers and not in a suitcase. I want your makeup cluttering the vanity. I want to come home and find you here - or be here when you come home - because this is where you live, not someplace you're spending the night."

I swallowed, mesmerized by his words and his loving expression. He stroked my back lightly.

"I want to bring you tea in bed and make you breakfast and take care of you. I want you to take care of me," he said huskily, his voice shaking slightly. "I want to marry you. I want us to have children with your beautiful eyes the color of the summer sky and your marvelous curly hair -"

He stopped at my sharp gasp. I felt my eyes fill and blinked, the tears rolling down my cheeks. He lifted a hand to wipe them away tenderly.

"I want a future with you, Cassandra. I want a life with you."

He ran his hands down my arms, closing his fingers around mine. His voice was a gentle caress, spilling over me like lapping water, making my body tingle and my head spin.

"You needn't decide now," he said, stroking my fingers. "You can let me know when you're ready. I just want you to know I want this - you...us. So when you're ready - if it's what you want - we can begin." He tightened his grip on my hands. "Will you think about it? About moving in? About - everything?"

I watched him, shock and joy flooding through me.

"I'm ready now," I whispered.

A brilliant smile lit up his face and my breath caught in my throat.

"Really?" he asked, looking delighted.

I giggled at his astonishment. "Yes," I said, slipping my arms around his neck. "Yes," I repeated in a whisper, brushing my lips against his.

His mouth captured mine in a lingering kiss, his arms crushing me to him. He nudged my top up and slipped it over my head. His gaze followed his hands as they caressed my neck and my breasts. I wiggled out of my underwear and he lifted me to his lap. My body was quivering with excitement at the feel of his warm hands on my skin after so long. With a shuddering breath, I lifted his shirt off and pressed my lips to his chest, my fingers tickling his chest hair. I slid to the floor to remove his jeans and boxers, running my hands up his legs as I admired him.

"You're so gorgeous," I breathed, stroking his muscular thighs and his trim waist. "You're perfect...and you're all mine..."

He pulled me into his lap again, settling my legs on either side of him.

"And you're mine, love," he murmured before his lips found mine.

I rocked against him, gasping in delight at the sensation. My head fell back and I felt his fingers between my legs, finding the button at the center of my pleasure and circling it steadily. I shuddered instantly, moving my hips against him. I circled my fingers around him, desperate to feel him inside me, but he held me securely, continuing to move his fingers until the tense coil deep inside burst apart and I shrieked and whimpered with pleasure. The warm tingle spread throughout my body until my ears were buzzing and my fingers felt numb.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, kissing my neck.

His hand covered mine, still wrapped around him, and we guided him together, sliding him home in one gentle thrust. He stroked my back and my legs, his mouth finding my breasts and teasing the nipples with his tongue. I locked my arms around his shoulders as our bodies met, alternating fierce, urgent movements with deep, languid thrusts. I felt him swell inside me and met his eyes. Threading my fingers in his hair, I smiled slowly and angled my hips. My release began and I lost the ability to move, only able to hang on to him as he drove me over the edge twice more.

"Come with me," I begged, my mouth finding his.

He groaned and gripped my waist, holding me steady as his body moved beneath me. I whimpered and moaned against his lips, spasming around him as he pressed me onto him for one final thrust and gasped my name. I slumped against him, our arms around each other. Our chests heaved in unison, his heart pounding rapidly against my chest. I pressed further into him to feel the reassuring beat, the tangible proof of this wonderful man who loved me, who was mine.

Our breathing slowed and he began placing soft kisses on my lips, cheeks, forehead.

"You're going to move in with me," he said in wonder, as if he needed to remind himself. "Thank you."

"I told you all you had to do was ask," I said with a breathy laugh.

He raised his head to look at me, cupping my chin. I saw an unidentifiable expression flit across his face and I watched him curiously, speechless. He smiled mysteriously but didn't speak. He only stood with me in his arms and took me to bed, curling his body around mine and drawing the covers over us. I splayed my hands on his chest, listening to the sounds of him drifting into sleep. I closed my eyes, a dreamy smile on my lips.

---

Nick covered his face with his hands and then dramatically drew them away to reveal a surprised expression. Louisa gurgled and flapped her chubby arms. I smiled, feeling as if my heart would burst at the sight. I caught Abigail's eye and saw her grinning at us. Nick repeated the gesture and this time I giggled along with the baby. She turned at the sound, reaching her arms out to me. I gladly picked her up, tucking her in my arms and burying my face in her dark hair.

"She'll need to eat soon," Abigail said softly.

"Well, that's going to be a problem, isn't it, Lulu?" I murmured, pulling back to look at her. "Because I don't want to let you go, no matter what your mum says."

Louisa's grey eyes regarded me seriously as if she was weighing her options. I glanced up to see Nick watching me with a warm smile. Teo passed us on his way to the kitchen, stopping to clap Nick on the shoulder.

"Better get to work on one of your own," he advised cheerfully.

I blushed, but Nick and I both chuckled. Reluctantly, I handed the baby to Abigail and nestled against Nick's chest, his arms circling around me as we settled against the couch.

"About ready to head back to the hotel?" Nick asked. "We have an early train tomorrow."

I looked at Abigail and the baby. "Can we stay for her bath?" I said hopefully, giving him a sheepish smile.

"Okay," he said, laughing.

I kissed his cheek. It was almost six months since I'd moved in with Nick, and this was our second visit to London to see his family in that time. We were ending this trip with a short holiday in Scotland, just the two of us. With each visit London felt more like home, and the addition of Louisa to the family had only increased that feeling. I had fallen instantly in love with her. She was a wonderful baby, extremely good-natured, but I know I would have felt the same even if she'd been fussy. Having never been around babies, I had never thought much about being a mother until I held her for the first time. From that moment I just couldn't get enough. It was almost as if I had heard the switch of my biological clock start its timer.

We had begun discussing moving to England after moving in together, but once Louisa was born, the topic quickly progressed from theoretical to reality. The next time we came to London, it would be permanent, and the thought of it thrilled me. We had only told our families about the move a few months earlier; Nick's family was ecstatic while my parents were happy and supportive, though subdued. I knew my living even further away was disheartening to them, but they had always encouraged us to live our own lives, and it helped that they liked and trusted Nick.

Nick and I sat silently, watching Abigail feed the baby, hearing the distant sounds of Teo and Louise chatting in the kitchen as they tidied up.

"This is perfect," I murmured, sighing happily.

Nick's arms tightened around me and I heard him catch his breath.

"It is," he said thickly. He cleared his throat and lowered his voice. "When do you think we should get married, pet?"

I gave a start, looking up at him.

"Are we engaged?" I teased, grinning.

He smirked. "Did I forget to propose to you?" he teased back.

I snickered, holding out my left hand. I wiggled the bare ring finger and glanced up at him.

"Looks like it," I said in mock seriousness.

I dropped my hand into my lap but he picked it up right away, flattening our palms together. He stroked each of my fingers rhythmically in a slow caress. I heard both our breathing deepen. Hooking a finger under my chin, he raised my lips to his for a chaste but lingering kiss. He rested his forehead against mine, our eyes locked. I smiled slowly, drowning in the dark pools of his eyes. I was just about to press my lips to his again when I felt something cool against our joined hands.

I turned to see him holding a ring over the tip of my finger. I gasped, meeting his gaze. He cupped my cheek, gently stroking my face. He smiled a little nervously, but his eyes were sparkling with love and happiness. I searched them, getting lost in the warm brown irises that glowed with the promise of our future.

"I love you, Cassandra," he whispered. "You're the air I need to breathe, the sun that starts my day, the music that keeps my heart beating. You're the life I didn't know I wanted."

I was already nodding, the tears spilling over my cheeks. We heard a sharp inhale from where Abigail was seated. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Louise and Teo appear in the doorway. I stifled a hysterical giggle, smiling up at Nick. Flashing me a wry smile, he lifted my hand, still holding the ring at the top of my finger. He paused when our eyes met again and I stopped breathing. Alight with the anticipation of our life together, they sparkled with commitment and hope, and with love.

In the span of a second, my mind flooded with images of the events of the past few years, from the beginning when I was naive and inexperienced to the time apart to us reuniting. The rainstorm in the park, that first kiss, his drawing of me, the exact spot in the coffee shop where he told me he loved me for the first time. I relived the emotion of each moment as the memories flashed by, my chest swelling with warmth.

Nick already knew how I felt, he surely could see it in my eyes in that moment, but the emotion coursed through me so powerfully I couldn't keep the words inside.

"I love you," I whispered.

His eyes softened and I saw a hint of moisture. He blinked rapidly, clearing his throat.

"Cassandra Rose Drake," he said tenderly. "I love you. You make me so happy...more happy than I thought possible...will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

I was still nodding, grinning widely. The flash of a camera startled me into awareness.

"Yes," I whispered.

We both turned our gaze to our hands and he slipped the ring onto my finger. He crushed my hand in his, kissing my fingers. I let out a sob, flinging my arms around him.

There were more camera flashes and the sound of clapping and excited murmurs, but I was only aware of Nick's strong arms around me, his heart beating steadily against my chest, his lips on mine. He held me close, our faces buried in each other's necks.

"I'm sorry it wasn't more private," he whispered into my ear. "I was going to wait until we got to Scotland but -"

I laughed softly, hearing the happy voices surrounding us.

"It was perfect," I whispered. "Just like you."

---

"Finally!" my mother crowed from the laptop screen as I held up my newly adorned finger.

Nick laughed and I turned to him in surprised confusion.

"He showed it to us when you were here," my father said, seeing my expression. "When he asked for our blessing."

"What?" I gasped. "But that was -" I paused, trying to do the math and failing. "That was months ago!"

Nick smiled self-consciously. Behind us his family was chuckling. I sat in stunned silence while Teo popped his head over my shoulder to tell my parents he'd email them the pictures he'd taken. Louise sat down and Nick turned the laptop so she could speak to my parents.

"Why did you wait?" I asked Nick. "We could be married by now."

He gave me a surprised laugh, wrapping his arms around me.

"Sorry, love," he said, chuckling and kissing me. "I didn't realize you were so impatient."

I elbowed him in the stomach, giggling.

---

Nick scooped me up as soon as the elevator doors opened, carrying me to the hotel room.

"I thought they'd never let us leave," he grumbled, unlocking the door.

"Well, what did you expect?" I laughed.

"Which is why I planned to propose in private," he told me haughtily.

He slipped my shirt over my head and fumbled with the zipper of my jeans.

"Christ, I'm like a teenaged virgin," he complained, joining in my laughter.

"There's no rush," I teased.

"I disagree," he said decisively. "You are going to be my wife, and we need to celebrate that properly. Now," he added, looking at me hungrily.

My heart did a somersault at hearing 'my wife' fall from his lips so easily. I smiled happily at him, tugging his shirt off and exploring his chest with my hands, my fingers dipping greedily into every hard line of his body.

"My husband," I whispered, testing the words on my tongue.

He froze for a moment and I blinked back tears as our eyes met. I don't know how my smile could have possibly grown, but I felt my cheeks start to cramp with the force of my joy. I shoved his jeans down his legs.

"Make love to me," I murmured, pressing my lips to his.

"No," he said huskily. "I will make love with you."

He picked me up, my legs automatically wrapping around his waist, and lowered us to the bed, giving me a long kiss. Unhooking my bra, he kissed each bit of flesh as it became exposed, moving his lips over my belly until he reached my panties, taking the hem between his teeth and dragging it down my legs. He began massaging the soles of my foot, hooking the leg over his shoulder before repeating the process with the other foot. Kissing his way up my legs, he settled himself between my thighs where I was already drenched and aching for him.

"Nick," I said in a groan, tangling my fingers in his hair.

"God, pet," he breathed, stroking me lightly and flicking my nub with his tongue. "I love you so much. I am never going to let you go."

"I'm yours," I said softly. "Forever..."

My head flew back as his tongue entered me. He worked his magic with his fingers, stroking and probing and caressing, his tongue penetrating me before circling around the sensitive button and then closing his lips around it. The spark began deep in my stomach, growing quickly from an ember to a raging inferno, heating the blood coursing through me. I felt the anticipation of the moment before release, knowing soon my body would clench and tense up. I pulled on his shoulders frantically.

"Please," I gasped. "I need you – I want you inside me when you make me come."

He let out an animalistic growl, intensifying his movements on my heated center until I was panting and begging. Finally he trailed his lips up my body until our mouths met, our tongues desperately swirling around the other. He rolled to his back, spreading me on top of him and I quickly straddled him. We both let out a long sigh as he slid into me. I flattened my body on his, planting my toes on his feet as we rocked steadily against each other.

Brushing the hair from my face, he smiled tenderly and kissed me, gently tugging on my bottom lip with his teeth.

"You're amazing," he whispered. "I promise to show you every day how much I love you."

I bit my lip, my chest swelling almost painfully.

"I promise to always be there for you," I murmured in return. "You can always count on me."

My climax was beginning and speaking was becoming difficult. I gasped and clutched his arms, my body shivering with excitement, with the prickling heat covering my skin.

"Remember," I whispered. "I'm yours. And I love you."

He gripped my cheeks, his fingers tangling in my hair.

"I love you, pet," he said gruffly.

He jerked his hips and I cried out. His lips were on mine, firm and scalding, coaxing more screams from me, encouraging my body to respond to the steel pulsing inside me. I shrieked and groaned against his lips, raising my knees to the bed so I could ride him, harder and harder until I was finally rewarded with his sharp inhale, the shocked gasp that meant he was joining me. He locked his arms around me, our bodies joined in a light sheen of sweat as we moved together, still trying to get closer, crying out together, tumbling into a heavenly abyss together.

---

A few months later I was standing nervously at the Marriage Bureau, my hands gripping my small bouquet of flowers so tightly I was crushing the stems. We had picked the first available date that our families could arrange to be there; it turned out that it was two years - almost to the day - of that fateful rainstorm that had started it all. My mother was circling me, smoothing the fabric of my simple cream-colored dress. Penelope fastened another pin into my hair to secure the flower and stepped back, running her eyes disapprovingly over my head. I was unable to prevent my exasperated sigh, anticipating yet another comment about how I should be wearing a veil. She looked at me defensively and opened her mouth to speak, but Thea pinched her arm. I could feel our father shaking his head at her warningly.

"I'm sorry," she said petulantly to us. "It's just - Cassie, you only get one wedding. I don't want you to regret not having the big dress and veil and reception and all of it."

It took all my self-control not to roll my eyes. It was the same argument I'd heard from her for months. I knew Penny, though still single, had every detail of her wedding planned out in her mind, from the big church wedding to the grand reception in some hotel ballroom, from the flowers to the music to the flowing white dress. It was impossible for her to accept that I wouldn't want the same thing.

Over her shoulder I noticed the doors opening. Teo held it open for Abigail, carrying a squirming Louisa. Sunlight spilled in, making it hard to focus at first. I watched as Louise walked in, then concentrated on the large form behind her as it transformed from a blurry shadow to the broad-shouldered, dark-haired, smiling man who was about to become my husband. I stared at him as his eyes swept around to look for us, stopping short at the sight of me. His smile faded as he looked at me in wonder. The sunlight dappled over his frame, bouncing off his body as if he were the sun himself. My nervousness disappeared and I smiled at him with love and excitement. He returned the look, his lips curving into the slow, meaningful grin he reserved only for me.

"I only get one marriage," I said to my sister, not moving my eyes from Nick's.

My mother gave a small gasp and dabbed her eyes. My dad took my hand, tucking it into his elbow and squeezed. He walked me toward Nick, the rest of my family trailing behind us. Penny sighed with a hint of longing.

"Why can't he have a single brother?" she said under her breath, making us all laugh.

"You look so beautiful," Nick murmured as we approached, an amazed look in his eyes. "Like an angel."

"You look gorgeous," I replied, taking in his charcoal suit.

I smiled at the bright blue pocket square and adjusted the knot of his perfectly straight tie just to have a reason to touch him. My father cleared his throat and held out a hand to Nick, shaking it firmly before placing my hand in his.




Meant To Be Ch. 10



"Take care of my little girl," my dad said in a gruff voice.

Nick nodded gravely. "I plan to, sir."

Nick actually looked somewhat intimidated by our father. I glanced at Thea and Penny, the three of us exchanging amused looks. Nick's hand tightened on mine and we grinned at each other.

Around us our families greeted each other quietly and there were flashes of a camera as Miles, our volunteer photographer, moved silently nearby, but Nick and I kept our gazes locked. I only tore my eyes from his when Louise kissed my cheek and I remembered my manners, turning to greet her. She surprised me by fastening a chain with a silver locket on it around my wrist.

"This was my great-grandmother's," she said, giving me a sweet smile. "We all wore it at our weddings," she added, taking my hand in hers.

"Louise," I said, stunned. "It's beautiful. Thank you."

Tiny, chubby fingers grasped the locket with a firm grip and we chuckled, turning to Abigail and the baby. Louisa launched herself at me and I staggered back, laughing and clutching her to me. My bouquet was crushed between us and she grabbed one of the flowers. I heard Penny's anguished gasp and laughed harder.

"It's okay," I said to Abigail before she could apologize or take her from me. "You can have whatever you want, Lulu," I said, kissing the baby loudly on her cheek.

"You are going to spoil that child," Abigail chided while smiling.

"Bloody right we are," Nick said, one arm around me and the other resting on Louisa's small back.

I smiled up at him, bouncing the baby slightly as she methodically ripped apart the flower in her hands. The sound of the doors made me look up and I waved at Gwen and Drew, followed by Ian and Maitri.

"Is everyone here?" my mother asked.

"Where's Declan?" I asked Nick, suddenly anxious.

He looked around for his friend, an easy smile spreading across his face as he saw Declan, chatting with Uncle Daniel, walking toward us.

"Whoa."

"Seriously."

I heard my sisters' reactions to the sight of Declan and smiled to myself.

"Right," Declan said, stopping in front of us and inspecting the sight that greeted him. "Shall we carry on with this so we can proceed with getting plastered?"

"Declan," Louise hissed, frowning at him and then the rest of us as we laughed.

Declan gave her an appropriately sheepish look, then winked at us. As if on cue, a door at our side opened and a woman stepped out.

"Hawthorne-Drake wedding?" she questioned.

My heart soared at the words and Nick's arm tightened around me. I looked up at him while Abigail plucked Louisa from my arms. He smiled tenderly down at me, holding out his hand.

"Ready to start our life, pet?" he asked under his breath.

I returned his smile, placing my hand in his.

"More than ready."



The End



Meant to Be Ch. 10



Lydia handed it to her father and the two girls kissed their Dad. "We love you, Dad." Aaron didn't know what to say. 

"Wait, Dad, there is more," Katie said.

Tom was next. "Our Dad never told us about what he did during World War II. We knew he flew bombers and met our mom. What my sisters found in trunk told us a lot more. It seems Dad was hero. He won a Bronze Medal, a Distinguish Flying Cross and a Purple Heart."

Tom took out a piece of paper. It was Aaron's citation. He read it.

Turning to his father, Tom said, "We feel you should have these where people can see them. You should be proud of them, as proud of them as we are of you." With that, he handed Aaron a box framed with his medals plainly visible. "Love you, Dad."

Before Aaron could move, Vicki stepped forward. "There is one more thing. In the trunk, the girls found this picture. It is a picture of Aaron's crew and their plane." 

She gave it to him. Only now it was a 12x18 photo and it had the autographs of all the surviving crew members. 

Aaron didn't know what to do or say. When his children pushed him to front of the people, he just stood there. He looked at his family, his mom, his sister Casey and her family, his friends. "I'm at a loss of words," he began.

Someone yelled, "That never stopped you before!" Everyone laughed and it placed everyone at ease.

"Wow!" he began again. "I guess I never looked at what I did as that different than what we all did in that war. We had a job and did it. Somebody had to. I truly feel what I have done since then is much more important. The one thing I got out of the war was the love of great woman. Without her, I could have never done anything especially to have three kids like these." He stopped and looked around. No one said anything. "Hey, everyone, this is suppose to be a party. Let's eat!"

That night as they readied for bed, Aaron asked, "Was all that the children's idea or yours?"

"Except for the crew picture, it was all theirs"

He sat on the edge of the bed. "Vicki, do you have any regrets? Seriously."

"About what, dear?" she answered.

"About marrying me?"

"No, why should I? Do you?"

"No. Heck, I still remember that first night we made love."

Vicki walked over to the bed and sat next to him. "So do I. It was in London and I was so nervous. I thought I wouldn't be good enough for you. I loved you then and I love you now." With that she stood up.

"Where are you going?"

Vicki turned off the overhead light and then turned on the soft light on her dresser. She turned to him. "You know I'm not the same girl I was 18 years ago. My body has changed." She pushed the straps of her nightgown off her shoulders. As it fell to the floor, she stepped out of it.

"My God, Vicki, you are so beautiful." She was right. Her body had changed. Her breasts were fuller and not as firm; her waist was thicker and hips wider but that's not what he saw. He saw the love of his life and she would always be that. He held out his hand, inviting her to the bed. "You know I'm not the same boy either."

She took his hand and climbed into the bed. 

"Let's leave the light on."