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I'm Not Amy

By: GatorRick



A big thank you to my wife for all her help with editing. Grammar and spelling has never been my strong suit. Without her help this story would not be as good as it is now. 

*****

NOVEMBER 2017 - OCEANA NAVAL AIR STATION

I had just returned yesterday from a work up cruise prior to my next six month deployment, when my cell phone chirped. It was a text from my older sister, Sally, just saying 'call me'. 

Pouring myself a healthy three fingers of my favorite bourbon, I sat in the living room of my rental apartment in Virginia Beach and keyed in her number. The phone rang several times and just when I was about ready to terminate the call she picked up. 

"Rick, thanks for calling me back so soon. I wasn't sure if you had gotten home yet but I decided to take a chance and text you. What date is your next deployment scheduled for? Please tell me it's after Christmas this time."

"I'll be leaving sometime in late February or early March," I replied somewhat hesitantly. "Why?" 

"Wonderful, I have a huge favor to ask of you. Please, Rick, can you come home this year for the Christmas Holidays?" 

"I know last year you were overseas on deployment, but please, please say you'll be able to come home this year."

Sally is my older sister. Married to Bill Cummings. He is a really great guy and I admire him for putting up with her. 

Ahh, just kidding. Sally is, and has always been, a great sister. She is three years older then me at twenty-nine. She married Bill while they were still in college and they have two wonderful little boys. Scotty, the older is seven and Tommy is five. 

I, also, have a younger sister, Kim, who is twenty-two and finishing up her last year and a half at the same university Sally and I had attended.

My name is Frederick Wagner. My family and friends call me Rick. I'm a lieutenant in the United States Navy stationed at NAS Oceana. I'm a naval aviator flying the F/A-18C Hornet, a multi-role fighter capable of speeds up to mach 1.8 (1,190 mph) at 40,000 feet. 

My parents still live in the same house where the three of us kids grew up in North Central Florida. Pop is retired now and so is mom, both from jobs with the local school district.

Well, back to the phone conservation. 

"Rick," Sally continued. "Bill is being transferred to Seattle in late January and Kim just informed all of us that she has been offered a scholarship to finish her last year and a half at Cambridge in Great Britain. She'll be leaving January 15th. This might be the last chance for the entire family to celebrate Christmas together for quite some time."

"I know how difficult it is for you to come home after what happened Thanksgiving a year ago. But please set aside those feelings and try to make it home this year." Sally pleaded with me.

Sighing deeply I told her I would make it home and would text her the information as soon as I was able to make flight arrangements. 

After ending the call I booted up my laptop to see what flights were available. I had thirty days of leave coming to me before my next deployment so getting the time off was no problem. Making my reservations on-line, I then texted Sally with the information and asked if someone could pick me up from the airport or should I rent a car. 

Sally answered saying she and Bill would be there and not to worry about renting a car. Six days later I found myself on a flight from Norfolk, Virginia to Atlanta, Georgia and then on to Jacksonville, Florida. 

On the flight from Norfolk to Atlanta I sat back in my seat and reflected on the last time I'd been home just over a year ago. 

******************

A YEAR AGO - NOVEMBER 2016

I'd managed to unexpectedly snag a four day leave on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. Not only that, I was lucky enough to secure the last available seat for a flight home. It was expensive, but well worth the cost or so I thought at the time.

There are no non-stop flights between Norfolk and Jacksonville, everything went through either Atlanta or Charlotte depending on the airline. Since I was flying Delta I would going through Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport.

I called my mom and dad, told them I was coming home and explained that since it was the only available flight it wouldn't get me into Jacksonville until after eleven. Dad said it wouldn't be a problem and they would be there to pick me up.

Then I called Amy, Amy Baker, my long time girl friend. I've known her ever since she moved in across the street with her mom, dad and younger sister, Susan, when we were both in grade school. She and I were more than just friends. I had her Christmas present all wrapped up in my carry-on. It was an eighteen carat gold necklace. Underneath the wrapping paper was I card saying that I thought this would nicely complement the engagement ring I had given her the last time I was home in September. 

She didn't pick up her cell phone so I left a voicemail message telling her I would be home late that night and would see her first thing Thanksgiving Day morning. I then called her home number and had to leave the same message when no one answered that phone either.

Arriving in Atlanta, I had a little less than an hour layover before my connecting flight to Jacksonville would leave. Fortunately that gate was in the same concourse as my arriving flight. I called dad, told him what flight I was on for the second leg and would arrive in Jacksonville at eleven thirty-five that evening.

Not to worry he said. He and mom would be there to pick me up. They would be waiting just outside the TSA Security Checkpoint in the main lobby.

The flight from Atlanta to Jacksonville was uneventful and we actually landed a few minutes early. Grabbing my carry-on from the overhead bin, I left the jet and followed the other passengers to the main lobby. 

Mom and dad were there to greet me and, since I had no checked luggage, we made our way to the parking garage. The drive home took a little over an hour and we arrived sometime after one in the morning.

I looked across the street at the Baker's house and saw the porch light on. This was unusual unless one of the girls was not home yet. 

Dad saw me looking and said, "George told me a couple of days ago that he and Doris were off to North Carolina to spend Thanksgiving with her parents and Susan was going with them. Amy didn't go. I saw her car parked in the driveway yesterday morning."

Thanksgiving morning I was awakened by the sounds of my two nephews yelling for me to get up. The little guys were relentless, leaving me no choice but to drag myself out of bed.

When I got downstairs I was informed that I 'JUST' had to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade with them. After greeting my two sisters and Bill, I was led to the sofa where I was 'FORCED' to sit with my nephews, one on either side of me. 

After the parade was over I went into the kitchen and asked if I could be of any help. My mom and sisters told me in no uncertain terms that the biggest help I could be was to keep out of their hair and keep the boys entertained until dinner.

Grabbing a football from the closet, the five of us guys went out on the front lawn. Looking across the street I saw that the porch light was still burning. Excusing myself from tossing the football around I dialed Amy's cell phone. Once more it went directly to voicemail.

"Amy, it's me. It's Thursday morning and I'm home. I only have today and tomorrow before I have to go back to Virginia. Call me as soon as you can. I miss you and love you."

The rest of the day was spent eating dinner and watching the NFL games on TV. Thursday evening went by with still no call from Amy.

Friday morning dad and I were drafted to accompany Kim and mom to take them to the Black Friday sales. I kept checking my cell phone every thirty minutes or so for any word from Amy. 

Finally we arrived back at the house, around four in the afternoon, with all the stuff that mom and Kim just had to have. Mom kept telling dad about all the money she saved him by going shopping the day after Thanksgiving. 

Dad just rolled his eyes and grumbled something to the effect she'd have saved him even more if she hadn't gone shopping at all. That was met by a playful punch to his arm from her, followed by a hug and a kiss.

As we unloaded the car I saw that the porch light was still burning at the Baker house. I made one more phone call to Amy.

"Sorry to have missed seeing you sweetheart. I'm leaving for Jax airport at ten tonight. Have to be back on the base early Saturday afternoon. I'm scheduled to leave on deployment on December fifteenth and the next couple of weeks will be hectic getting ready to leave." 

"I guess this means we won't see each other until late May or early June. I'll try and call as often as I can. Love you." 

Then I sent her a text with the same message.

I was more than just a little pissed that she didn't return any of my calls or text messages. Perhaps if I had been able to give her a little more advanced notice of my trip home for the holiday things would have been different. But the leave request had been unexpectedly granted and ... well it was, what is was.

Sally, Bill and the kids came over for leftovers and to say good-bye to me Friday evening. They left for their home in time to get the boys in bed at a reasonable hour.

At a quarter to ten I took my carry-on out to put it in the car for the trip to the airport. I glanced across the street and the porch light was off and Amy's car was in the driveway. Grabbing the present, from my bag, I walked across the street. There was a light shinning in the living room and the one lit upstairs was from what I knew was Amy's bedroom.

Some guy I'd never seen answered the door when I knocked. All he had on was a blanket wrapped around himself. I pushed past him and stepped inside.

Just then Amy came down the stairs frantically tying her robe and asked, "Dave, who was that at the door?"

Seeing me she rushed over and tried to hug me saying, "Rick, what are you doing home? How long can you stay?"

Fending off her embrace I answered her. "About fifteen minutes. I came home late Wednesday night for Thanksgiving. Didn't you listen to your voicemails or read any of the text messages I sent?"

Looking at 'Dave' and then back at her I said. "I guess you were otherwise occupied." 

Tossing the wrapped package onto the coffee table I said to her, "here's your Christmas present. Do whatever you want with it and the engagement ring. Keep them, give them away, throw them out or sell them. I don't give a damn."

With that I walked out the door slamming it behind me. I made it half way down the front walkway when the door opened and Amy shouted to me. 

"Wait, please, wait! I can explain. It's not what you think it is, Rick!"

I turned and fired back. 

"NO!! It's exactly what it looks like. Good-bye, Amy. I'm going to miss you. But don't call, don't email and don't write me."

Dad had backed his car from the garage and was waiting for me, with mom and Kim in the backseat, in the street. They saw and heard the entire exchange. As we drove away dad asked. "Want to talk about it?"

Taking a deep breath before I answered him. "Not really, pop, not now." 

On the drive to the airport I was able to tell the three of them what I could about my upcoming deployment. I told dad I left a note on the kitchen table explaining how they could reach me while I was away. As I got out of the car, at the drop-off for departing passengers, I asked all of them not to share any of that information with Amy. 

Mom and Kim both hugged me good-bye before getting back inside the car. Then it was dad's turn. He hugged me and whispered into my ear. 

"May you always have calm seas and a following wind. Be careful out there, son."

Hugging him even closer I replied. 

"I will, pop, I will. I'll call before l leave. Good-bye dad."

******************

DECEMBER 2017 - BACK TO THE PRESENT

My flight to Atlanta arrived on time and I had just a short thirty-five minute layover before my connecting flight to Jacksonville left. I called Sally, gave her the flight number and told her I would be arriving sometime between six and six-thirty that evening.

I made the gate with some minutes to spare and boarded shortly thereafter. Settling into my seat, my mind drifted back back to the deployment a year ago. 

******************

DECEMBER 2016 - THE DEPLOYMENT ONE YEAR AGO

After arriving back in Norfolk just after three in the morning, I went home and crashed until around noon. When I woke up I saw my cell phone was loaded with voicemails and texts from Amy. I deleted them without listening or reading them then I blocked her number. That didn't stop the letters. They went into a large envelope, unopened, with a short note that simply said "STOP IT" then I mailed it to her.

Saturday afternoon I collected and took everything I would need for a six months deployment, mostly flight suits and a couple of uniforms in case we made any port calls, over to the ship. I was sharing a cabin with three other officers. One guy actually brought a forty-two inch flat screen TV. I contributed my DVD player and a collection of movies for us to watch during our down time from flight operations.

The carrier was scheduled to sail Saturday evening. After depositing my gear aboard the ship I went to the BOQ and checked in along with the other members of my squadron. 

In all the commotion preparing to leave I had little time to think about what had happened to me over the Thanksgiving weekend.

My squadron, one of nine, flew out to join up with the aircraft carrier 'Abraham Lincoln' (CVN 72) early the morning of December fifteenth. 

Flying a fighter jet requires your total and complete attention and that I was able to do. Lining up my approach to the carrier deck I landed, catching the third arresting wire, a perfect landing.

After the last of the guys had landed we assembled in our squadron's ready room for a briefing. There was a lot of speculation on our mission focus given the results of the recent Presidential Election.

The new president would be sworn into office on January 20th. One of the issues he campaigned on was to correct the mistakes of the previous administration in American Foreign Policy. 

From his speeches he appeared poised to follow the ideas of President Theodore Roosevelt who said, over a hundred years ago, that in matters of foreign policy he was prepared to "Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick". It resonated with the voters and he was swept into office with a huge majority of the popular vote. How all this would affect our six month long mission remained to be seen.

It took almost six days days for our task force, which include four frigates and two Aegis class cruisers, to cross the Atlantic and enter the Mediterranean Sea. Then an additional four days to arrive at the Suez Canal. Christmas and New Year's Day was spent at sea. The cooks did an admirable job preparing Christmas dinner feeding the 3200 seamen and 2400 air crew aboard.

Transiting the Suez Canal was a dicey operation for the carrier. The narrow confines of the canal left us vulnerable to terrorist attacks. The entire crew breathed a sigh of relief when we entered the Red Sea and then moved on into the Arabian Sea.

Except for the long hours spent in the canal, I flew patrol flights during the entire voyage with my squadron. For the next month and a half things were relatively quiet. 

Then in late February 2017 our task force received orders to enter the Persian Gulf. The Iranians were threatening to shut down all access to the gulf from the Strait of Hormuz northward. No military vessels would be allowed to sail in these waters. Diplomatic talks got no where so the president decided it was time to wield the 'Big Stick'.

I had just launched from the carrier along with my wingman, Thomas 'Hangman' Bennett, some five miles from the entrance to the strait when we received word that radar detected two surface targets headed toward the carrier at a high rate of speed.

I dropped down to fifteen hundred feet above the surface to investigate. I had a pretty good idea what was about to happen as I had been briefed on simulated attacks on a mock up carrier conducted by the Iranians almost two years ago in February 2015.

"Eagle 3 to CDC (Combat Direction Center), I have acquired targets. There appears to be two 'go-fast' boats traveling in tandem. I'm going in for a closer look."

"Understood, Eagle 3," replied lieutenant-commander Madison in the CDC of the carrier. 

I dropped down another thousand feet and flew directly over the speeding targets for a look-see.

"Eagle 3 to CDC. Confirm, two targets. One appears to have no crew aboard. The second target seems to be controlling the first target remotely."

"Shit!! Taking small arm fire from second target. Permission to engage," I yelled.

"Permission to engage granted." Madison ordered. "We don't need another 'Cole' incident," he added.

Just before he ended his transmission I heard him mumble "take the fucking bastards out."

I climbed back up to fifteen hundred feet and set up a run at the two speeding targets. Arming two Hellfire II laser guided air to surface missiles I 'locked on' to the targets and heard the confirming tone on my headset.

After firing both missiles I banked slightly in order to get a good view of what was to happen. Both 'go-fast' boats erupted in a massive fireball. It appeared that they had both been loaded with high explosives.

"Eagle 3 to CDC. Both targets are no longer a threat."

Over the next few weeks Iranian fighter jets were constantly trying to break through our combat patrols to get to the carrier. Our F-18s managed to keep them well away. Then one afternoon four Iranian fighters broke through our patrol screens. 

Their asses were quickly 'splashed' before they could get closer than twenty miles to the 'Lincoln'. All four of the pilots ejected from their aircraft and were quickly rescued by one of the Seahawk heloes from the carrier. Needless to say their capture made the nightly news back home for all to see as well as the rest of the world.

Shortly thereafter diplomatic talks were resumed at the request of the Iranian government. It appeared that the 'Big Stick' approach got results. The remainder of the deployment cruise was without any further major incidents. 

When we returned back to Norfolk in the middle of May the carrier was met by a huge crowd of family and friends including my mom and dad. I got to spend some quality time with them before returning to duty at Oceana.

****************** 

DECEMBER 2017 - BACK TO THE PRESENT 

The announcement from the flight attendant informing the passengers that the captain had turned on the fasten seat belts sign and we would be on the ground and at the gate in Jacksonville in about twenty minutes returned my thoughts to the present.

Making my way to the reception lobby I saw that Sally and Bill were there to welcome me home. After picking up my checked bag from baggage claim we made our way to Bill's car in the short-term parking garage for the drive home.

It was quite a welcome. My mom and dad, two nephews, and Kim were all over me as soon as I stepped from the car. After handshakes, hugs and more than a few kisses we made our way inside. Just before entering through the front door I turned and looked at the Baker house. There was a figure watching from the front window and then the drape was quickly closed. 

Inside the house a man I didn't know was standing next to Kim holding her hand. She quickly introduced him to me as her boyfriend, Rob, from college. Come to find out he lived a few miles away with his parents and older sister.

Christmas was a great time for me, especially with my two little nephews. I think I enjoyed playing with their toys as much as they did. I did catch a glimpse of Amy from time to time but we never spoke.


I'm Not Amy



A few days before New Year's Eve, Kim came to me with a problem. She and Rob were going to attend a New Year's Eve party with Sally and Bill but Rob's sister, Darlene, had received word that her fiancée had been wounded in combat with ISIS terrorists. Rob didn't want to leave his sister at home. 

"Rick, would you agree to escort her to the party?" Kim implored. "The party is formal but you can wear your dress blues instead of a tux."

I somewhat reluctantly agreed, knowing just how devastating that kind of news could be to families and loved ones.

Upon returning to Rob's home after the dance we were greeted with news from Darlene's mother that her fiancée was recovering from his wounds and would be returning back to the states by the end of the month. I far as I was concerned it was the perfect start to the New Year.

******************

After saying my good-byes to my family I returned to Virginia to resume preparations for my next deployment. A week later the squadron was summoned to a meeting with our commanding officer. Our squadron along with eight other ones were being reassigned. 

It seems the Pentagon had decided that a new Gerald Ford Class carrier was to be stationed at Mayport Naval Base in Jacksonville. The last carrier to be based there was the USS John F. Kennedy which had been decommissioned in August of 2007.

The new carrier would have two nuclear reactors, four shafts and a speed of 30+ knots (better than 35 miles per hour). The crew consisted of 4,539 men and women (ship, air wing and staff).

The Ford Class also employed a brand new system for launching planes from the deck known as Electromagnetic Aircraft Launch System (EMALS). 

The older Nimitz-class, as well as other carriers, had always got planes moving for takeoff using steam-actuated catapults. The system required a lot of steam piping, a large condensate return, and tons of fresh water. They also had a lot of maintenance issues. Plus, with steam-actuation, the majority of the force is being transferred to the airplane at the beginning of the stroke—it's one hell of a jolt believe me. But a more linear pattern of acceleration could put less stress on an airframe, and thus get a longer lifespan out of the under carriage of the multi-million dollar fighter jets. That's where EMALS pays its way.

EMALS uses a linear induction motor with an electric current to generate a magnetic field. That field then propels a carriage down a track. It's basically a gigantic railgun that launches airplanes instead of shells. Pretty damn cool if you ask me.

The EMALS can even accommodate lightweight drones as well as heavier aircraft. It reaches top speeds gently, reloads more quickly and requires less maintenance. The arresting gear (the mechanism which catches the planes as they return to land) also uses EMALS technology as well, as will the elevators for the airplanes and weapons. The Ford class essentially eliminates steam and its associated problems from the equation. 

My squadron along with eight others were being reassigned to support the new ship. We would be based at NAS Jacksonville just a few miles north of my mom and dad's home. It meant I would not be going on deployment for the rest of the year while we trained with the new carrier.

It also meant we would have a whole lot of acclimation ahead of us to insure that the deck crews and flight crews would be able to operate efficiently. It would take the better part of a year of intensive training getting used to the new systems. Hence, any deployment would be delayed to sometime the following year.

I called mom and dad to tell them the news and asked if they would begin to scout out an apartment for me. I wanted something close to them but not too far from the base. Being on the east side of the St. John's River would be ideal. 

A few days later dad called with several possibilities he had found for me to consider. I drove down to scout them out. Then dad said something to me that made a whole lot of sense. 

"Rick, why do you need an apartment? When you go on deployment it's for six months at a time. Why pay rent for something you'll only use half the time? Now that your sisters are gone our house is empty and lonely. Your mother and I would really like it if you came home and lived with us."

That made a lot of sense so I decided to accept his offer. Leaving my car at mom and dad's I flew back to Norfolk. 

I was back in time to meet the movers the Navy had a contract with for relocating personnel. They packed up everything I owned, which wasn't much since it was a furnished apartment, and would transport my belongings back home to Jacksonville. Two days later I flew my fighter, along with the rest of the squadron, to NAS JAX.

Once there we began intensive training with the new carrier. There were several short cruises, sorting out any problems that were sure to crop up with a new ship and new technology. I flew countless missions practicing take offs and landings. Finally in early March of the following year we went on a two week full work up cruise in preparation for a deployment that would take place in late April.

On a Saturday morning, fifteen days before our scheduled departure for the Persian Gulf, I went for a morning run. It was a beautiful morning with clear skies and a warm sun. 

Just about five miles into the run as I was coming down a tree lined street a small dog scampered into the street in front of me followed by a little girl running after him. I saw a car approaching that didn't appear to be slowing down. The dog raced back to the sidewalk but the girl simply froze in place. 

In two strides I grabbed her and swung her to safety just as the car struck me. I rolled across the hood, sliding up to the windshield before falling to the street and slamming my head against the pavement. Everything went black as I lapsed into unconsciousness.

The next thing I remembered was waking up in the hospital. Mom and dad were sitting by my bedside.

"What happened?" I asked. "All I remember is seeing a little girl and a car about to hit her. Is she okay?"

"Yes. Just a skinned up knee and an awful fright. Seeing you lying in the street really scared her," mom replied. 

Then dad quickly filled me in on some of the details. Broken right leg and a severe concussion. "The doctor will be in to talk with you in a few minutes and explain it all to you." 

When the doctor arrived he told me I had a compound fracture of my lower right leg, various scrapes and contusions complemented the concussion. 

"It is the concussion that has me worried. We'll be keeping you here for a few days You were really, really fortunate not to have fractured your skull," the doctor explained to me.

"I guess this means I'll be missing my deployment in two weeks." I, laughingly, stated.

"Afraid so," he replied. "I've already been in touch with your squadron commander. I informed him of your situation. He told me that he'll stop by later this afternoon to see you."

It was after four o'clock when Commander Williams, my squadron commander, appeared in my room. 

"Wagner, couldn't you have come up with a better way to avoid deployment," he said with a big grin on his face.

"Seriously, though. Do you know that the little girl you saved is Admiral McMann's grand daughter? He's given me orders to place you on indefinite medical leave until you have fully recovered. So rest easy, Lieutenant, you did good, real good."

It was early that evening when mom came into my room and said to me. "You have some visitors. Are you up to seeing them?"

"Who are they?" I asked her.

"It's the mother, father and another woman of the little girl you saved," she answered.

"Okay. Sure, send them in."

The three adults followed my mother into the room. The man, a little older than me, introduced himself as John McMann along with his wife Barbara and her sister Christine Miller.

"I cannot begin even to tell you how grateful we are for your quick action. You saved our daughter, Kathryn's, life."

Come to find out that Barbara McMann had left their daughter with her mother to watch while she went to a dentist

appointment.

"Christine stopped by the house on her way home from school." Barbara explained. 

"When she opened the front door Kathryn's little puppy escaped with my daughter hot on his heels. Before either mom or my sister could react . . . . well . . . . well you know the rest." She said trying not to cry.

Christine stepped from behind her sister and brother and I got a good look at her. She was about five foot five or six. I wouldn't even hazard a guess as to her weight. It wouldn't be polite. Let's just say it was more than just appropriate to her height. She had dark brown hair that fell to her shoulders, framing her face and she had the most intense blue eyes. Her smile simply lit up the room.

"Thank you, thank you. It is all my fault that you got hurt. If I hadn't opened the front door little Fritz wouldn't have escaped," she whispered

"No," I responded. "It wasn't anyone's fault. It was an accident, just an accident pure and simple. I'm just glad that everything turned out okay."

"But everything is not okay. You're so badly hurt . . ."

I stopped her right there. "Hey! I'm alive, bones mend, scrapes and contusions heal. Please don't beat yourself up over what happened. Everything turned out for the best."

After expressing their thanks once more they left. 

As they were leaving I saw Christine glance back at me with an expression on her face I didn't quite fathom. 

Five days later I was released from the hospital when the doctor was satisfied the concussion would leave no lasting effects on me. Dad arranged for a hospital bed to be delivered and set up in his den so I wouldn't have to navigate the stairs up to my room.

The day after I got home mom came into the den announcing that there was someone to see me. It was Christine. 

"I wanted to stop by and see how you were doing," she offered, "and I brought you a 'Get-Well Soon' card that Kathryn made for you. So how are you doing?"

"I'm doing all right. Most of the scrapes and contusions are healing well quite well. The leg will have to remain in a cast for another five or six weeks, though." 

We had a pleasant conversation for almost an hour when mom interrupted. "Are you ready for lunch, Rick? Miss Miller would you like to join us. It's just sandwiches and soup."

I answered for her. "Yeah, mom she will be staying."

"Thank you, Mrs. Wagner, are your sure it will be no trouble?" she added.

For the next few weeks Christine stopped by to visit almost every day. As the weather got warmer and warmer we moved from the den out to the screen porch by the pool. We learned a lot about each other as we explored each other's hopes and plans for the future.

Christine was finishing her degree in secondary education with hopes of becoming a teacher. She had completed her internship and was just finishing a few elective classes before graduation. 

I told her all about what happened with Amy. Christine made no derogatory comments about Amy other than to say she though that she acted very foolishly. 

Christine then asked me if I thought that I would be able to forgive her and, perhaps, get back together with Amy. 

I sat for a few movements and reflected on her question before answering. It led to a very long and revealing conversation concerning love, trust and loyalty. It seemed that Christine and I had almost identical beliefs on the subject. 

In the end I answered her question. 

"Yes, I'd like to think that I could forgive her. But I don't think I could ever be able get back with her. Once I lost my trust in her I don't think I could ever recover it."

On more than one occasion we went out together. We went to see the 'Phantom of the Opera' playing at the Times Union Center for the Performing Arts. In addition, we went out to eat several times. Christine had to drive since I still had the cast on my leg. 

One night we went to a fancy restaurant right on the river for dinner. Afterward we took a booth in the lounge listening to the music from a small dance band. Christine was sitting next to me and was almost dancing in her seat when a guy came over and asked her to dance with him. 

She politely told him, "no thank you." 

He persisted and she responded. "What part about 'NO' do you not understand? I'm here with 'MY' boyfriend and I will not abandon him to dance with you or anyone else. Now please leave us alone."

With that she moved closer, smiled at me and gave me a kiss. That was a special moment for the both of us. 

Once the cast came off I was able to begin full-time rehab on my leg. I started by walking everyday and gradually increased it to some light jogging. Many afternoons Christine and I would jog in one of the many parks in the Jacksonville area. Finally, in late summer I was able to pass the flight physical that allowed me to return to active duty.

Christine and I spent as much time together as our busy schedules allowed. She graduated in late May and began making the rounds to the various school over the summer months that she thought she would like to teach at.

One evening in August we were having dinner with my folks when dad asked how her job search was progressing.

"Not encouraging so far," she responded. "I've got some really good letters of recommendations from my professors and from the school I did my internship at, but so far no one wants to take a chance on a new hire. I'm sure something will break for me in the near future," she said with confidence I was sure she didn't feel. 

I saw my mom glance at my dad with 'the look' and knew something was up.

Got to tell you about my dad. He worked for over thirty-five years in the Duval County School District. The last fifteen years were at the district level, finishing as the director of teacher personnel before he retired. A lot of people owed him favors. I know he made a phone call the next morning and . . . . 

Three days later an excited Christine called me. "I've got an interview! Tomorrow morning. I'm so nervous. It came out of nowhere."

"Relax, sweetheart. Just be yourself and you'll do just fine," I told her. 

Just after noon a very excited Christine called me. 

"I got it . . . I got it! The principal offered me the job at the conclusion of my interview. She said I was a perfect fit for the position. I'm so happy I can hardly sit still. Can I come over so we can celebrate when you get home this afternoon?"

Celebrate we did. Christine insisted that mom and dad join us for dinner. After the meal, as we sat toasting Christine's new job, she raised her glass to my father and said to him. 

"Thank you for everything you did for me."

With a look of mock horror on his face dad responded. 

"I did very little. All I did was make one little phone call to remind a certain principal of a young woman who got a second chance many, many years ago. Everything after that happened was all your doing."

When school started up in the early Fall, Christine would come over two or three time a week. Come to find out Christine was teaching the same subject mom had taught before her

retirement. Mom and she would spend a couple hours of those afternoons writing lesson plans and developing strategies she could use with her students.

In late October things had heated up in the Middle East and I received word that my squadron would be deployed sooner than expected.

The last week of November 2017 I was back on my way to the Persian Gulf. 

The last few nights before I left were intense. I had fallen deeply in love with Christine and she told me she had fallen in love with me on the same day I stepped in front of that car saving her niece's life. 

"Rick, Remember one thing . . . I'm NOT Amy. I'll be here for you when you return," she said kissing me over and over again. 

******************

February 2018 - TRAGEDY

The first ten weeks on station were uneventful. There was a squeeze on to finally defeat the ISIS terrorist forces and I was flying support missions to back up the coalition ground forces. 

My wingman and I were returning from one of these missions deep inside Iraq when my cockpit suddenly filled with smoke. As system after system failed it became impossible to control the aircraft. 

Bailing out over ISIS held territory was not a good thing given what they were prone to do with captured enemy combatants. But I had no choice and was forced to eject from my crippled fighter. 

Landing safely I quickly disposed of my parachute and sought some shelter to hide until night fall. Finding a crevice in a nearby hillside I took stock of my situation. One half liter bottle of water, six water purification tablets and four energy bars were all I had with which to survive.

I had my H and K .45 calibre pistol with ten rounds in the magazine with an additional two fully loaded magazines in the pocket of my flight suit. 

When I went to activate my emergency locator beacon I discovered it must have been torn away from my flight suit when I ejected. "Damn!!" I was in some deep trouble now. Without the beacon transmitting my location there was no way I could be located for rescue.

I knew if I stayed put I ran the risk of capture so I made plans to start hiking out of the immediate area. Traveling by night and hiding during the daylight hours would be the safest course of action.

Sixteen days later and I had still managed to avoid capture. But now I faced a more serious problem. Water. I hadn't been able to find any water in more than three days. Without water I would die from dehydration in a matter of hours.

Just before dawn I found a bombed out building. The roof had collapsed into the main room and the windows and doors were gone. It would be in all likelihood my final resting place. I crawled inside and seriously considered ending my life right then and there. 

Then in my semi-conscious state I saw Christine and her voice told me how much she loved and needed me. I put my gun away and fell asleep exhausted. Excited yelling from outside the building woke me up. I had been discovered.

Taking my pistol I went outside to meet the enemy. I didn't even have the strength to raise my gun before it was snatched away from me. Blacking out I fell to my knees and collapsed in the dirt. The next thing I knew I was being supported in a sitting position with a water bottle held to my lips.

"Slowly, drink slowly my American friend. You must take only small sips right now," a man's voice was saying to me.

Seeing the terror in my eyes he continued speaking. 

"Do not be afraid. We are not ISIS. We are Kurdish Peshmerga. We fight against ISIS. You are safe and you will be protected by us," he said in halting English.

Helping me to my feet and supporting me as we walked to a pick-up truck. "Come. It is not safe here," he explained.

Placing me in the back seat of an extended cab pick-up, he handed me another full water bottle and something to eat before he got into the front seat and ordered the driver to proceed.

For the next six weeks I lived and fought alongside these brave warriors.

****************** 

FEBRUARY 2018 - JACKSONVILLE, FLORIDA 

Rick had been gone the better part of two months. There wasn't hardly a day that went by without me receiving either an e-mail or a letter via snail mail. On more than a few occasions we able to hook up with each other on Skype.

I had made it a habit to visit Rick's mom and dad three to four times a week after school. By now I was calling them Momma Emma and Daddy Karl. We would share any news we had from Rick with each other. Well, almost all of what Rick had written to me. Sometimes a mother doesn't need to know everything about her son's love life. 




I'm Not Amy



My sister Barbara and her husband John along with their daughter Kathryn had moved to Orlando just after Christmas when John received a promotion to head up a regional office.

Barbara was four months pregnant and it was proving to be a difficult pregnancy. She had been ordered to stay off her feet and get a lot of bed rest or risk losing the baby. My mom decided to go there, stay with her, taking care of her and Kathryn, a very energetic five year old. So I was pretty much by myself.

It was Tuesday, January the 6th when the unthinkable happened. I had left school around three-thirty in the afternoon to drive to the Wagner's home. As I turned the corner onto their street I saw a gray Ford sedan with government plates pull away from the house.

Rushing up the walkway to the front door I rang the bell and knocked loudly. There was no response. Trying the door latch I found it to be unlocked and let myself in. 

I found them sitting on the sofa. Karl had Emma wrapped up in his arms as she sobbed onto his chest. The scene before me caused my heart to sink and brought tears to my eyes.

It was several moments before they recognized my presence in the room. Karl motioned me to sit on the sofa next to them.

"Rick's plane went down two days ago. He was seen ejecting and parachuting to the ground. Since then there has been no word of him. He's been listed officially as 'Missing in Action' by the Navy." 

Karl went on to tell me that the Navy promised keep them informed of any new developments as they became known.

Emma stretched one of her arms out and pulling me close to her we cried together.

From that day forward I spent every afternoon and evening with them. For the first few days Emma was too distraught to even think about eating or making supper. So I would make all three of us something to eat in the evening and clean up afterward. After a couple of days she began to return to her normal 'mother mode'.

Both Sally and Kim, who had started a new job in Charlotte, North Carolina, called every day and that helped a lot. 

On Thursday the telephone rang about four-thirty. None of us wanted to answer it. Karl finally picked it up.

Listening for a few moments he said. "Well, that is encouraging. I was afraid you had bad news." 

Pausing as he listened, he continued. "Okay. I realize news like that would prompt a personal visit. Thank you. This gives us some hope."

Turning to us he relayed the conversation. 

"That was the officer who was here last Tuesday. He told me that there has been no announcement on any social media by ISIS about the capture or death of an American airman. He told me if Rick had been captured or killed it would have been widely spread across the internet by them."

The three of us agreed that this news did give us a glimmer of hope that Rick might somehow return safely to us. It was ten or eleven o'clock that night when I finally left for the forty minute drive home.

On Friday, after supper, Emma and Karl asked me to sit in the living room as they had something they wanted to discuss with me.

"Christine," Emma began. "For the past three nights you haven't left here until ten-thirty or eleven o'clock. We both feel uncomfortable with you making that forty minute drive home by yourself so late at night. We worry about you. Would you consider staying here with us until ...? Until we know . . . . "

I thought to myself that the past few nights had been horrible for me. Going home to an empty house and unable to fall asleep worrying about Rick made their invitation very appealing.

"Are you sure I wouldn't be a bother to you?" I asked.

"Not in the least," Karl replied. "Having you here has been a Godsend for both of us. Please say yes."

"Tomorrow is Saturday and you don't have to go to work. Stay here tonight and in the morning you can go home and pack a bag or two and return."

"All right. I accept your gracious invitation. Where do you want me to sleep?"

"There are three bedrooms upstairs. Kim's, Sally's old room and Rick's. Pick one." I was told.

That night I went upstairs and went into Rick's room. I sat on his bed and kicked off my shoes. Nestling my head into his pillow I could almost still smell faint traces of his aftershave. It was the best night's sleep I had since he left two months ago.

As weeks went by without any more news the three of us established an almost normal routine. I would come back home every afternoon after work, help Emma make supper and then help her with the clean up. 

Afterward I would sit at the table grading papers and making lesson plans. It wasn't long before Emma was helping me. We had the chance to talk about Rick. She shared a lot of intimate information and stories about him with me. The more she shared the more I grew to love him. 

The third Saturday in March, as I came back from checking on my mom's house, I saw that same gray Ford sedan parked along the curb in front of the house.

Thinking the worst I rushed inside to the sounds of Emma sobbing. It took me several moments to realize that her sobs were not tears of grief but of joy and relief.

Entering the room I found Karl holding Emma while she cried into his chest. He had the biggest grin on his face as he beckoned to me with an outstretched arm.

"They found him! He's alive, he's okay!" He managed to tell me before he wrapped me up in his arms along with Emma.

It was several minutes before we recovered our composure and the two officers explained all that had happened.

The details were still a little sketchy but it seems Rick had been found by elements of the Kurdish Peshmerga some weeks ago. He had been with them for over a month and a half before he was repatriated with American ground forces in Iraq. 

"Right now he is at Landstuhl Regional Military Hospital in Germany. He is getting a full physical examination and extensive de-briefing while there," we were told. 

"Lieutenant Wagner will leave Germany late Monday from Ramstein Air Force Base for an overnight flight to Andrews Air Force Base in Maryland. Upon arrival he will immediately be placed on a flight back here to NAS JAX. The scheduled arrival for that flight is Tuesday morning at 0900 (9 AM)."

"The Navy will make arrangements for your entire family to be there when he arrives. I understand he has two sisters. One living in Charlotte, North Carolina and the other lives with her family in Seattle, Washington. They are being contacted, as we speak, to coordinate arrangements for them to be flown here. Someone far up the chain of command has gone out of his way to make this all happen," he added.

As they left, the senior officer turned and said to us. 

"Rarely do I have the pleasure to deliver good news to families and loved ones. This has been truly a memorable day for me."

Once they left the three of us just looked at one another with the 'I don't believe what just happened' expression on our faces. Soon after the telephone rang. Emma answered. It was Sally.

"Mom. Is it true, is it really true? Rick is safe and on his way home? An officer from the naval base here in Seattle just left with the news and told us about the arrangements for us to fly Jacksonville Monday morning. The boys are so excited and so are Bill and I."

That call was soon followed by a call from Kim. 

I called my mother in Orlando and gave her the good news. She was thrilled and promised to drive up with Kathryn Monday afternoon. John would have to stay at home with Barbara since she was so near to her due date and wasn't permitted to travel anyway. 

Kim arrived first. She elected to drive down from Charlotte rather than fly and got here late Sunday. Sally, Bill and the two boys flew commercial and got into Jacksonville Monday afternoon.

We had just finished cleaning up the supper dishes when the phone rang. It was my mother. Barbara had gone into labor and was at the hospital. Mom felt that it would be best if she stayed close by . . . just in case.

"Christine, Kathryn says to give Rick a hug and a big kiss from her and Barbara said to make sure you give give him one from her, too."

"I'm so disappointed that I can't be there with you to share in the joy and happiness on his safe return. I don't need to tell you to hug and kiss him for me as well," she finished.

Tuesday morning at eight o'clock a U.S. Navy mini-bus pulled up in front of the house. Our escort came to the front door to see if we were ready. We had been ready for over an hour waiting with growing excitement as each minute ticked by. We all piled aboard and were soon on the way.

As the bus approach the gate to the base I saw cars and trucks lined for almost a mile waiting to clear through the main gate check point. I thought it would take forever to clear security onto the base and we would miss Rick's arrival. Just then a car from base security pulled in front of the bus in which we were riding and turning on its blue emergency lights we sailed past everyone.

Following our escort the bus drove right out onto the flight line. We didn't have to wait long and all of a sudden Scotty the oldest of Sally's kids shouted.

"There it is. . .there it is! I can see a plane. Is it Uncle Rick's?"

Our escort office looked at his iPad and confirmed Scotty's observation."

Led by Emma and Karl, the entire family trooped off the bus as a small executive business jet with naval markings taxied up to us.

******************

As the plane taxied toward the flight line I could see a small group of people waiting in front of a mini-bus. As we got closer I saw it was my entire family. Just as soon as the cabin door was opened I bolted down the boarding stairs into the arms of my mom and dad. They were soon joined by my sisters and two nephews.

After a few moments I saw Christine standing back from the family. Disengaging myself from them I managed to take two steps before Christine was in my arms. The family gave us a few seconds to embrace before surrounding us. The trip home was one of celebration with a lot of shouting and laughing.

When we arrived back at the house everyone wanted to know everything that had happened to me over the past two months. For the next ninety minutes I was able to tell them almost everything, all but a few details, since some were still classified and some were very personal.

Christine got up from her seat and announced that she was going to fix lunch for all of us. Sally and Kim volunteered to help.

"No, stay and talk with mom and dad," Christine said as she left the room. They both ignored her and trooped off to help.

Bill decided to take the boys outside to run some of the excess energy little boys at that age always seem to have. That left mom and dad with me. 

Looking at them I asked about Christine referring to them as 'mom and dad'. For the next forty-five minutes while the girls were preparing lunch they told me the entire story.

"Rick," dad said. "If it hadn't been for Christine's fortitude and faith that you would come back safely I don't know what your mother and I would have done. Quite frankly, she was a Godsend for us."

"Lunch is ready," Sally said as she went out to call the boys and Bill inside to eat.

We had just finished eating when Christine's cell phone began ringing. Retrieving it from her purse, she looked at the caller I.D. and said. "Its my mother."

She left the room but soon returned with a huge smile on her face and announced. "Twins! My sister had twin boys!"

"Looks like my mother is going to be staying in Orlando for the foreseeable future. She is so excited I could hardly understand what she was saying. Golly! Twins!"

Soon after lunch was over the doorbell began ringing. Somehow neighbors and friends had learned of my return and were coming by to say hello and welcome me home.

Along about five o'clock the stream of visitors slowed and finally stopped. I looked around for Christine and didn't see her. Kim told me she had gone upstairs a few minutes ago. I went up and found her in my bedroom. A suitcase and overnight bag were on the floor at the foot of the bed.

She was sitting in the middle of the queen size bed with her feet tucked under her. Clutching a pillow I could see that she was crying softly.

Stepping into the room I sat on the bed beside her gathering her into my arms. I asked, "what's wrong?"

"I came up to gather the last of my things when I realized that this would be the last time I would be in this room. When I first came here two months ago I felt safe and protected. Every night when I fell asleep I sensed your presence with me. As long as that happened I knew you were alive and safe. Now . . . ." 

She wasn't able to finish her thought before I reached out to her and enveloped her in my arms. 

"Christine, it doesn't have to end. I love you, Christine. I never want to be apart from you, again. Will you marry me?"

It seemed like an eternity before she nodded her head and managed to whisper softly, "YES".

"Tomorrow morning we'll go to the mall. There are several jewelry stores there and I'm sure one of them will have the perfect ring for you."

Before I could go any further she stopped me.

"Rick, I already know the ring I want." 

"Your mom told me all about what Amy said when you wanted to give her your grandmother's ring. She even showed me it. Your grandmother wore it with love for almost sixty years. It's perfect. That's the ring I want."

With that I went over to my dresser and in the very back of the top drawer was a small box with my grandmother's ring. Retrieving it I walked back to Christine and knelt down in front of her and asked, once more. "Will you marry me?"

Christine pulled me onto the bed alongside of her and once again whispered 'Yes' in my ear. I kissed her and she kissed me back. Then, I'm embarrassed to say, I fell asleep not just asleep but I crashed. I hadn't had a full night of uninterrupted sleep for the last two months and the mental and physical fatigue had finally caught up with me. Not real romantic but it was what it was. 

I don't know what woke me but I sat up in bed and saw on the digital clock, that rested on the night table, that it was one-thirty seven. I didn't remember removing my clothes but I found myself wearing only my boxer briefs. I was in bed alone. 

The door to my bedroom was open. I saw light streaming from underneath the bathroom door directly across the hallway. 

The light went out and a figure emerged, entered the bedroom and closed the door. It was Christine. She lifted the blanket and slid back into bed along side of me. 

I mumbled something and she replied. "Go back to sleep, sweetheart. We'll talk in the morning." 

She pulled me into her arms and the next thing I remembered was sunlight pouring through the open window. 

"What time is it," I asked? 

"It's almost ten. You've been asleep for over twelve hours." 

"I don't understand what happened. One minute I was kissing you and the next thing I remember is waking up a few moments ago. Believe me it wasn't intentional and certainly not very romantic on my part given the circumstances."

"Rick," kissing me she said. "Monday afternoon, the day before yesterday, a doctor from the naval hospital met with your parents, the rest of the family and me. He explained that from the medical information faxed to him from Germany you were suffering from acute exhaustion, both physical and emotional. Falling asleep as you did would be just your body's way of healing itself."

She continued to tell me that the doctor had also explained in detail the symptoms to watch for if I were to suffer from PTSD. 

"After you fell asleep last night I undressed you, put you to bed and went downstairs to tell your parents that you were sleeping. Your mother spotted the ring on my finger immediately." 

"When I told them I was going back home for the night your mom asked me, 'What's wrong, isn't the bed big enough for the two of you'?"

"I didn't know what to say. I just stood there with my mouth hanging open when she hugged me tightly and told me, 'Go back upstairs, he needs you'."

With a big grin on my face I said to Christine. "Well, that's my mom. Never one to mince words."

After we both showered, and I shaved, we dressed and went downstairs together.

Six weeks later we were married. Christine wanted a small wedding so it was just family and a few close friends. We held the reception in her mother's backyard. Nothing fancy, just a buffet and a small wedding cake.

We went on a honeymoon cruise through the Hawaiian Islands. The weather was beautiful, warm in the daytime and pleasantly cool in the evenings. Ten days later we headed home to Jacksonville and the apartment we had picked out together.

For the next seven months everything was just absolutely wonderful. Christine and I were perfectly matched for one another. Then I received orders for my fourth deployment in three years.

After a tearful good-bye, I left with promises to keep in touch daily via email and Skype. The six month deployment seemed like it was lasting six years to me. Thankfully, there were no major incidences. When I returned home Christine was waiting for me on the pier along with the rest of my entire family. 

After catching up with all the events that had transpired while I was away I learned that Bill and John's company had merged. John had been promoted to the Assistant to the COO and Bill was now the Assistant CFO. 

Christine and I escaped back to our apartment for a very, very private celebration. Christine had managed to secure some personal leave from her teaching job and we spent the next five days reacquainting ourselves to one another.

The very next Saturday we were invited to a welcome home cookout at my sister Kim and her husband Rob's home. 

Yep. My baby sister had gotten married and moved back to Jacksonville. 

I'm sure you remember Rob. He was Kim's date for New Year's Eve a couple of years ago. They had lost touch with one another when Kim went to England to complete her studies. 

Rob happened to be in Charlotte on business when they accidentally ran into each other and the rest of the story, as they say, is history. Rob is the owner of a consulting firm here in Jacksonville so Kim secured a transfer here shortly before their marriage.

The day of the Bar-B-Que found the guys, me, dad, John, Bill watching as Rob manned the grill while the girls were in the kitchen fussing over Barbara's twin baby boys. Sally and Bill's two boys were busy kicking a soccer ball around in the back yard with Kathryn.

As Rob was preparing the grill for the steaks, John was lamenting the fact that he was going to have to leave town the next afternoon in order to attend a meeting in Atlanta on Monday morning.

It seems that the commercial airlines' schedules were not compatible with his schedules. 

"I've been burned too many times," he said. "Flight delays and even cancellations have disrupted my plans. Now I find it necessary to leave the day before my meetings and incur the additional costs of a hotel room, not to mention the lost time away from Barbara and the kids."

Rob turned and asked. "Why doesn't your company get a couple of business jets to fly you and the rest of the executives on an as need basis?"

"Too expensive to buy them," John responded. "Besides what about pilots?"

"Don't buy them," Rob answered. "Lease them. Hell of a lot less expensive. Then find some pilots to hire to put on your staff of employees. Rick might be able to help you with that little problem."

You could almost see the light bulb go on over John's head.

"Umm. Something to think about," John said as Rob put the steaks onto the grill.

Four days later John called and asked if he and Bill could come over to the apartment. He said they had something to discuss with me. 




I'm Not Amy



We arranged to meet the following Tuesday evening. Christine had meetings at school that evening with the parents of her students and would not be home until sometime after nine.

John and Bill arrived a little after seven, I made us something to drink and we sat in the living room. 

"Rick, something that Rob said at the Bar-B-Que at his house several days ago got me to thinking. I asked Bill to round up some figures for me about our company's travel expenses."

Opening his briefcase he withdrew several sheets of paper. 

"Rick, these are the figures pertaining to the cost of the company's airfares for our top executives and senior staff members for the past year," he said handing me the paper. 

"As you can see they are quite substantial. Now here are the expenses for lodging and food for trips that were either delayed or cancelled," he said passing me another page.

Looking at the figures I saw that they were almost a third as much as the cost of airfares.

"Now these figures do not reflect other intangible costs such as lost productivity spent while waiting around air terminals and not to mention time spent away from families necessitated by our executives having to leave a day early in order to meet conference schedules. Those cost are really incalculable."

"What Rob said about leasing corporate jets and hiring our own pilots sounded intriguing," John said. 

"So Bill did some research and came up with these projections." Handing me a third page he continued speaking.

Looking at this third page I was surprised to see that these numbers reflected a substantial savings over the first two pages of figures.

My curiosity got the better of me and I was already to question John about all of this when he asked me. 

"Would you be interested in heading up a new division for the company as Director of Flight Operations and Chief Pilot? You would also have the responsibility to recruit four additional pilots to fill your staff."

Handing me a fourth and final page he said, "and this is what we would offer you in salary and benefits."

I looked at this page and then looked again. The salary alone was more than forty thousand dollars a year greater then my current pay as a lieutenant commander and the new commander of the squadron.

"John, this is a very generous offer. But there are some things of which you should be aware. First, while I currently do hold VFR (Visual Flight Ratings) and also IFR (Instrument Flight Ratings) I'm only certified to fly single engine jets. I would need to acquire a multi-engine certification to fly a corporate business jet."

"We are aware of that, Rick. The company is more than willing to pay the costs for you to obtain that certification. The same holds true for any of the four pilots you recruit that might need that certification as well."

"One more question for you, John. Legally would this be considered some sort of nepotism since both you and Bill are my brothers?"


"No, Rick. Our corporate attorneys have assured us that since this new division will be an entirely separate entity not under my or Bill's supervision. We are good to go."

"Wow! This is a lot to take in. I need to check on my active duty status with the Navy and see how long it would take to be placed in the Reserves. Of course, I really need to talk this all over with Christine before I decide. May I have a few days before I give you my decision?"

"Not a problem," they both said in unison. 

"Great. Today is Tuesday and I'll have my answer for you before the end of the week."

Bill and John left just about ten minutes before Christine came home. When she noticed the empty glasses on the kitchen counter she asked who had come over.

"John and Bill. Remember I told you the other day that John wanted to speak with me."

"Oh, that's right," she said. "It completely slipped my mind."

"Come on into the living room. I've got a lot to tell you."

For the next hour I explained everything John and Bill had proposed to me. Christine listened intently, only interrupting once or twice to ask a question or clarify a point. When I finished I asked her what were her thoughts about the whole thing.

She looked at me and said, "ultimately it is your decision, Rick. I know that whatever you decide will be in the best interest for both of us. You do realize that whatever you decide I'll stand alongside of you all the way."

Hugging her tightly I responded. "No, Christine. It's not just MY decision. It is OUR decision. Our marriage is an equal partnership, I need to know, I have to know, your thoughts and feelings."

"Sweetheart it's getting late and we both have to get up early for work. We do not have to reach a decision tonight. Let's sleep on it and we can talk more about it tomorrow afternoon. Okay?"

When we got into bed she rolled towards me gave me a kiss and murmured in my ear. "You know I'm not going to be able to sleep a wink thinking about all of this."

"Well then let me give you something else, more important, to think about right now," I said gathering her into my arms as I reached over turning the light off.

The next day I thought long a hard about John's offer. I made a written list of the pros and cons and they about equaled out. 

Putting the list down, next to a photograph of Christine, on my desk, I turned away and looked out the window of my office toward the flight line where the fighter jets of my squadron were lined up, gleaming in the afternoon sun. It was then I realized what my decision had to be. Now all I had to do was hope that Christine would be in agreement with it.

I left the base a little early to insure I would be home before Christine arrived at her normal time of four o'clock. Going into the apartment I quickly showered, shaved again and changed into a pair of slacks and a polo shirt.

When Christine arrived home she found me standing in the living room looking out the window. I turned and gathered her into my arms and whispered into he ear. 

"Let's go out to dinner. We'll talk later."

Giving me a quick kiss she replied, "just give me a minute to change and freshen up."

Driving in the car toward our favorite restaurant, along the Saint John's River, I asked her how her day went.

"It wasn't the best of days, Rick. All I could think about the entire day was the decision you would reach." 

"Rick, I'll be honest with you. Every time you leave on a training cruise or go on another six month deployment I'm scared to death that I'll never see you again." 

"But then when I hear the pride in your voice and see the look of satisfaction on your face when you speak about what you do in trying to make the world a safer place for all of us I know I could never take that away from you."

"So whatever your decision may be I want you to know I am with you one hundred and ten percent. I love you so much. I just want you to be happy." 

"Christine, I know what I want." As we walked along the river, on the path toward the restaurant, I began explaining what I had thought about all day.

"I made a list of all the pros and cons and it didn't help. I placed it on my desk, along with John's offer, right next to your photograph. Then I turned and looked out at the flight line with all of my squadron's fighter jets glistening in the afternoon sun. It was an inspiring sight that filled me with a great deal pride in who I am and what my life is all about."

"Then I turned back, saw your photograph, as I logged on to my desktop computer. Searching through the menu I found the form I was looking for and filled it out. My finger hesitated for just a second over the 'delete' key before I hit the 'send' key requesting a transfer from Active Duty to the Reserves."

"I'm going to accept John's offer, sweetheart. That last deployment, away from you for six months, was pure hell. I want to stay here with you, forever, for the rest of my life."

Before I could say another word Christine leapt into my arms, hugging me tightly, as she cried onto my shoulder.

"Are you sure, Rick? I only want for you to be happy. I love you so much."

"Absolutely!" I said, as I lifted her face upward kissing her. "ABSOLUTELY!"

******************

EPILOGUE - THREE YEARS LATER

The flight today was a easy hop down to Orlando with a half dozen techs from the company's Information Technology Division. Something to do with fixing some bugs in the new software package that allowed faster integration within the company's entire computer network. Couple of hours later, problem solved and an easy forty-seven minute flight back to Craig Municipal where our base of operations was located. I had selected Craig Municipal because of its close proximity to the company's headquarters in Mid-Town Jacksonville.

I was driving home to the house Christine and I bought almost two and a half years ago when she told me we were having a baby. My mind wandered back to everything that had happened since I accepted John's offer three years ago.

We had searched high and low for something we both wanted. Finally we found a two story, five bedroom, five bath, pool home with deep water access in Fort Caroline Shores. After some back and forth negotiations with the owners it was ours. One of the five bedrooms was converted into a craft room and another became my home office. 

It had taken me six months before I had the new Division of Flight Operations for the company up and running. I hired three men and one woman, all former naval aviators, to fly the two leased business jets. So far I have heard nothing but compliments on the service we were supplying the company's executives and senior staff members. 

As a matter of fact, Bill called just the other day telling me that our operations had saved the company something north of twenty percent over the previous arrangements.

Parking my car in the attached garage I entered the house through the laundry room.

"I'm home. How are my two favorite girls?" I asked as I walked into the family room where Christine was on the floor playing with our two year old daughter, Kaitlin.

Seeing me she toddled over with her arms stretched out demanding to be picked up. 

Picking her up I threw her in the air as she screamed with delight. "How's my little girl today?" I asked as I gently put her down and helped Christine to her feet.

"What did the doctor say this morning?" I asked.

"Everything is fine," Christine responded. She told me that I'm about three month along and the sonogram showed absolutely no problems."

"We're having a boy. I'm so excited."

"Wow! That's wonderful. Have you told anyone, yet?"

"No. I thought we'd tell your parents tonight at dinner and then go over and break the news to my mother."

For the next five months everything went along just fine and then . . . 

******************

"Mr. Wagner," my secretary said sticking her head inside my office door, "there is a Florida Highway Patrolman here to see you."

I got up from my desk and walked out into the outer office. I don't remember hearing anything other than . . . your wife and child . . semi-truck . . red light . . airlifted to Shands Trauma Center.

Driving through Jacksonville at four in the afternoon is a nightmare. Traffic is slow anyway and to compound matters there was construction narrowing the lanes on the 115 across the St. Johns River. 

While I was stuck in traffic I called my mom and dad and told them what had happened. Dad said they would meet me at the hospital. Then I called John and asked him to get a hold of Barbara, Christine's older sister, and have her break the news to their mother.

Arriving at the trauma center some thirty minutes later, I parked and ran into the emergency room. Identifying myself to the clerk at the desk I asked about my wife and child. She typed something on the computer keyboard at her desk and instructed me to go through the doors to my left, down the corridor to the nurse's station and they would direct me from there.

The clerk pushed a button, the locked doors opened and I rushed down the corridor. A nurse at the desk told me that my daughter was in treatment room one and I could go right in. I found Kaitlin lying on a bed crying for her mommy with a nurse standing by her bed trying to calm her. 

Sweeping her up in my arms I held her until her crying subsided. The nurse told me she was fine other than some bumps and bruises. Fortunately she was in her car seat, in the back seat, away from the impact side of Christine's SUV.

"What about my wife?" I asked. 

Just then a doctor came into the room and checked Kaitlin over, turned to me, introducing himself as Doctor Reynolds and said. 

"We'll be keeping your daughter here for a few hours, but you should be able take her home later on this afternoon." 

I repeated my question about Christine's condition. The doctor looked at me and said I looked familiar. Come to find out he was the flight surgeon that released me back to active duty some years ago after I had broken my leg. He was now in the Reserves and had seen me a couple of months ago when I had a new flight physical.

He told me that he didn't know anything about Christine's condition but he would try and find out what was happening for me. I returned my attention to Kaitlin, continuing to soothe her.

The doctor had no sooner left when my mom and dad walked into the room. Mom immediately went into Grandma mode and soon had Kaitlin completely calmed down. Dad took me outside the room and asked what I knew about Christine's condition.

I just shook my head and said, "nothing yet."

Dad took my arm and steered me over to a small seating area. "Let grandma look after Kaitlin for a while. We'll wait here for any news."

Twenty minutes later Kim and Rob showed up followed shortly thereafter by Barbara, John and Christine's mother. Bill and Sally appeared ten minutes later. After telling them all the information I had, the girls joined my mother in Kaitlin's room.

The nurse from Kaitlin's room appeared and told us that Kaitlin was being discharged in about ninety minutes and we could take her home. Kim volunteered to take her back to my house so the rest of us could remain waiting at the hospital.

Every fifteen minutes I inquired at the nursing station if there was any word about my wife. All they could tell me was that she was still being treated.

Three hours went by when suddenly Doctor Reynolds reappeared. He apologized for not coming back sooner but but the emergency room had gotten swamped. Two gunshot wounds, a heart attack and a tree trimmer who had touched a high voltage wire kept him busy.

Now that he had a few minutes respite he would see what he could find out about Christine for me. Another half hour went by before he returned accompanied by an older man dressed in scrubs. He introduced him as Doctor Thompson, the trauma center's chief surgeon.

Doctor Thompson explained to me and my family that he had just finished treating Christine. 

"We managed to save the baby, although he appears to be about four to five weeks premature. His birth weight is low and we have him on a ventilator helping him breathe. Right now he is upstairs in the neonatal unit. I firmly believe that he will be fine in a couple of weeks or so."

"Your wife is another story. She was badly injured in the accident. She suffered a severe head injury causing her brain to swell. Our best neurosurgeon managed to relieve that pressure. But we have had to place her into a medically induced coma in hopes of felicitating a recovery. 

"The entire left side of her body is badly bruised. Her left knee and hip were damaged. There is no sign of breakage but every one of the ligaments were torn. I have repaired them. Now, coupled with the exertion of giving birth, your wife is in extremely guarded condition."

"Right now she is being moved to the Critical Care Unit. We'll know more in the next forty-eight to seventy-two hours as to her chances of survival."

"I don't want to give you any false hope but your wife is young and strong and . . . . . with God's help she'll pull through. I am extremely sorry to have to give you such devastating news but you should know just in case."

"When can I see her? I asked him.

"I'll take you there now," he replied. "As I said she's in the CCU up on the third floor."

As we left Doctor Reynolds stepped over, shook my hand and told me he and his wife would be praying for her.

When we stepped out of the elevator onto the Critical Care Unit floor Doctor Thompson led us down the corridor to Christine's room. The door was shut. Opening it he turned and said to me. "Give me a few minutes before you go inside."

He entered the room and shut the door behind him. In less than a minute he returned explaining he wanted to check to be sure everything was hooked up and functioning properly.

"Before you go inside Mr. Wagner prepare yourself. She is not going to look anything like you remember her."

As I stepped inside I saw Christine lying there with a sterile dressing on the left side of her head, a trach tube down her throat, I.V.s in both arms, wires hooked up to several machines monitoring blood pressure, respiration and other of her vital functions. She also had several small patches on her head with wire leads to a machine that I assumed was monitoring her brain activity.

Moving over to her bedside I grasped her right hand and leaning over, kissed her gently on her forehead. I whispered in her ear how much I loved her. I could have sworn I felt her hand tighten on mind as I whispered words of love and encouragement.

After a few minutes I left her side allowing her mother, Barbara and John along with my parents with Bill and Sally in to see her. They stayed for about five minutes before leaving. 

Doctor Thompson met with us briefly in the hallway encouraging us to go home and get some rest. He told us that if anything changed in Christine's condition the hospital would call immediately. 

I asked Doctor Thompson if it was all right for me to stay with my wife. "She has always stood by me. Now it's my turn to stay by her side."

The doctor saw no problem with my request. After watching everyone go downstairs in the elevator I turned and went back into Christine's room. Pulling up a chair to her bedside, I sat down, grasped her hand and started talking to her. 

Sometime during the night I fell asleep. I was awaken by one of the nurses who came to check on Christine. She asked if I was okay. 

"Just a whole lot stiff from sleeping in this chair all night, other than that I'm fine," I replied. 

Mom, Dad and Christine's mother appeared sometime after nine. Dad brought me a cup of coffee and something to eat that he picked up in the hospital cafeteria before coming up stairs.

He, also, brought a change of clothes and my travel kit bag. After eating I went into the small bathroom in the room, brushed my teeth, shaved and changed into the fresh clothes.

When I reappeared, Doctor Thompson was there with another doctor he introduced as Doctor Elizabeth Greene. 

"Doctor Greene is one of the best neurologists here at Shands. She will be handling your wife's case from here on out." Shaking my hand, he said in leaving, "all my best to you and your wife." 

Doctor Greene then proceeded to explain what course of treatment she planned in the days ahead. 

"I am encouraged by your wife's brain wave activity as evidenced by these readings from the EEG," she said, holding up a strip of paper with all sorts of squiggly lines.

After examining Christine for some minutes, she left. Mom, Dad and Christine's mom stayed for about an hour before they left telling me they would be back later in the day. I resumed my seat next to the bed and began talking to Christine once more.

Later that evening, after everybody had left, an orderly appeared with a new chair. "Doctor Greene thought you could use a more comfortable chair since you are planning to stay the night again."




I'm Not Amy



I spent the rest of the night talking to my wife before falling asleep sometime after midnight.

The next morning Doctor Greene appeared and examined Christine once more. She summoned a nurse and told her to transfer Christine to an examining room for a CAT scan.

I remained behind in the room waiting. A little over an hour went by when they returned. Doctor Greene had a smile on her face when she told me that the scan had revealed the swelling around Christine' brain had dissipated to the extent that she was ordering the drugs that had kept her unconsciousness to be stopped. She, also, removed the trach tube and eliminated one of the I.V.s.

"She should be a lot more comfortable now," Doctor Greene said, when she had finished.

"How long will it be before she regains consciousness?" I asked her.

"It could be several hours, a few days or even longer. Every patient responds differently," she replied. "All we can do at this point is to wait and see."

And wait and wait and wait. Ten days passed with no sign of Christine regaining consciousness. I spent almost every minute by her bedside holding her hand and talking to her. 

When my parents or Christine's mother and sister visited I was able to leave for an hour or so. It gave me time to shower, shave and change into the clean clothes my dad would bring. The nurses were kind enough to offer the use of the staff locker room. 

Then I would run on over to the pediatric nursery to see my son and check on his progress. He was doing just fine and I was even able to hold him. The pediatrician told me he was gaining weight and was only four ounces away from being able to go home.  

The head nurse, chuckling, when she said, "and he has a great set of lungs and isn't afraid to use them when he's hungry or needs changing."

Late that night, as I was recounting what the pediatrician and nurse had told me, I felt Christine's hand tighten on mine and heard her say something to me.

"Baby? . . . Son? . . ." She whispered. 

I pushed the 'call button' and when the nurse arrived a few seconds later I announced, "She's awake . . . she spoke to me!"

As Christine became gradually more alert I set her mind at ease, telling her that Kaitlin was fine. She was staying at home with the two grandmothers who were watching and no doubt spoiling her. Then I went on explaining more about the accident and our son's premature birth.

"He gained enough weight that he was able to go home yesterday. Your mom and my mother are watching him as well."

Just as I was finishing Doctor Greene entered the room. 

"Mrs. Wagner, how are you feeling?" She asked as she proceeded to examine her. 

"I am going to order another CAT scan for tomorrow morning and we'll run a few more tests. Barring anything out of the ordinary I believe we'll be able to release you in the very near future."

Then she went on telling Christine, "you have quite a husband. He has not left you for more than a few moments since you were admitted. He's very much in love with you."

"I know," Christine replied looking at me. "Believe me, I know. And I am very, very much in love with him."

The following afternoon the results of the CAT scan and all the other tests came back 'normal'. Doctor Greene delivered the good news and told us that Christine would be discharged before the end of the week.

Just as Doctor Greene was leaving Doctor Thompson entered the room. The two spoke briefly and then he approached Christine's bedside.

"Let me examine your knee," he said to her. Unwrapping the bandages he continued speaking. "Wonderful, there appears to be no signs of infection around the sutures. However, I'm afraid you will have to be placed in a soft cast to immobilize your knee for a few weeks."

"We want to make sure that the internal sutures repairing all your ligaments are not disturbed," he explained. "It means that the physical therapy for your knee will have to be delayed for a while. But you can start physical therapy for your left elbow and shoulder."

He turned to me and said, "I'll have a list of physical therapists to choose from when she is discharged. Select one and I'll write the referral for your wife."

Five days later when I went to sign the discharge papers for Christine I was also handed the list of physical therapists as promised by Doctor Thompson. As I scanned the list of seven recommended therapists I saw that four were on the west side of town, two were on the south side and was was reasonably close to where we lived. Choosing that one I handed the document back to the discharge clerk. 

On the way back to Christine's room I glanced at the bill. Holy crap! It was well into six figures. Even with medical insurance my out of pocket expenses would be substantial.

But hell it was worth every penny of it. I still have my wife alive to be able to take home. 

Christine was more than ready to leave when I got back upstairs to her room. After a little bit of difficulty, the nurses and I were able to get her into the back seat of my SUV. I buckled her up and we took off for home. When we arrived I got her out from the car, into a wheelchair and began to wheel her to the front door. 

Before we got half was there the door opened and Kaitlin, both grandmothers and my dad came out to greet us. Kaitlin rushed over yelling, "Mommy, mommy." She threw her arms around Christine and laughing and crying at the same time told her how much she missed her. 

After everyone greeted her, Dad helped me carry the wheelchair up the front steps and into the house. Grandma Miller disappeared for a few moments but soon returned carrying a crying little infant, our son Scott.

She placed him into Christine's outstretched arms. Just as soon as she held him to her chest he stopped crying. 

"It appears someone else is happy to see you home," I said to Christine.

After lunch Christine said she was tired and would like to lie down for a while. 

"Okay. Let's go upstairs to our bedroom." I answered as I wheeled he over to the stairway. "I had this chair lift installed the other day. It will make it a snap for you to get up and down the stairs."

Pulling the comforter down I helped her into our bed.

"Stay with me for a while, please," she asked.

"This is the first time we have been truly alone together since the accident," she said snuggling up next to me and immediately falling asleep. 

Several hours later the ringing phone on the night table by the bed woke me. Caller ID identified it as the Physical Therapy Clinic. I answered it. 

The caller introduced himself as Doctor Todd Edwards. He explained he had a referral from Doctor Thompson. He was calling to inquire if it would be convenient to stop by to conduct an evaluation in order to assess what had to be done in developing a PT program for Mrs. Wagner. We set an appointment for seven that evening.

When he arrived he was accompanied by a young woman who he introduced as his wife. He went on to explain that both of them would be involved in Christine's therapy.

While they examined Christine he insisted I stayed in the room. When the evaluation was complete he demonstrated several exercises I could help Christine with to strengthen her upper body.

After setting an appointment for the following day, they left. Christine asked me to help her with the exercises the therapist recommended before we went to bed. 

"I want, I need to start this right now," she exclaimed to me.

I'd not seen anyone with the fortitude and willpower she displayed. I saw the pain in her face as we went through the exercises but she refused to stop.

The next morning I drove her to the clinic to begin her physical therapy. I watched as they put her on the machines that would both stretch and strengthen her upper body. After thirty minutes Doctor Edwards asked her if she wanted to stop and take a break. 

She replied to him she wanted to continue for the remaining thirty minutes uninterrupted. When we left she was exhausted.

A few days later as we were having breakfast, Christine told me about some dreams she had while in the hospital. I discussed them with Doctor Greene and she told me they were probably the result of the medications I was taking and not to worry.

"I'm not on any medications now and I had the same dream again last night."

She went on to recount her dream. 

"I was walking in a very arid place and came upon an old destroyed building. I ventured inside and saw you with a pistol in your hand pointing it at your head. I screamed at you to stop, telling you how much I loved and needed you."

That really shook me up. I couldn't recall ever telling her anything about that moment. Then I remembered. 

"While you were still in the coma I sat with you every day and talked about our life together. I confided some things with you I had never told you before." 

"That day I was about ready to give it all up and thought about about ending my life. Then I saw your face and heard your voice telling me you loved me and needed me. It was then I knew that I would survive."

It was a very emotional moment for the both of us. I got up, knelt by her side and we embraced, crying in each other's arms.

Then Christine continued telling me of her dreams. 

"In another dream I was walking toward a very dark place when I heard your voice. You said how much you loved me and that I just had to get better. When I turned way from the darkness I saw you standing in a warm, sunny light with your arms outstretched for me. It was at that moment I knew my life was with you and I turned way from the darkness."

That morning we were more than an hour late for her PT appointment.

Several weeks later the cast came off and she displayed the same fortitude and determination to strengthen her leg. 

"I'm tired of using a wheelchair or crutches to get around. I want to regain my mobility as quickly as possible. We can't expect my mother and your parents to care for our children forever." 

"I want to play with our daughter and take care of our baby son," she told me, "and if it means I have to put up with some pain and discomfort so-be-it." 

So we settled into a routine. I would drop Christine off at the clinic for her physical therapy every morning before heading on over to work. My mom and dad would pick her up afterwards and bring her home. Between the two grandmas and dad, Kaitlin and Scott were well looked after.

As Christine slowly regained her strength and mobility she was able to take over much of the responsibility of caring for Scott. At first all she could do was hold him and rock him to sleep. She soon took over the feeding and changing of his diapers.

One Friday afternoon after returning home early from the airfield I immediately noticed how quiet the house was. No Kaitlin running over to greet me. 

"Where is everybody?" I asked Christine.

"Kaitlin went with my mother to visit Barbara and her kids for the weekend. Scott is with your parents visiting Sally and his cousins. We are home alone for the whole weekend," was her response.

"I received great news today from Doctor Edwards. I'm finished with physical therapy."

"Rick, do you remember what I told you when you asked me what would were we going to do with all these bedrooms when we bought this house? I told you I wanted to fill them with children."

Taking my hand, leading me toward our bedroom and kissing me she said. "Let's get started making more right now."

Leading me toward our bedroom I heard her mumble . . . "I'm sure glad I'm not Amy."



I'm not an Evil Man



This is a BTB story, well sort of. If you don't like those kinds of stories DON'T READ THIS. You won't find it to your liking. There is no sex, there are no wimps, and there aren't any "GREY AREAS" of understanding. That's not the Huedogg style. 

*

What would you do if you came home to scene I just witnessed? My first impulse was to grab my gun and lay waste to them. Lucky for them, I'm not an evil man. I've lived by my own code most of my life. The only time I had to conform was my time in the military. Where there are no places for individuals.

In the Army there is the right way, the wrong way and the Army way. We knew the difference between right and wrong, or at least I hope we did. Everybody may have different versions of right and wrong, but we know the truth

Murder is wrong. "Period". I knew it was wrong but at the time and according to my attorney, I was legally insane. I didn't realize what happened until it was over. At the time it wasn't funny, but it is today. I'm sitting in front of a medical review board. They are trying to figure out if I'm ready to return to society. One of the doctors asked me is robbery was wrong? I told him yes, you shouldn't take what doesn't belong to you.

Then I thought about it some more. Robbery is wrong, but only we you get caught, right? It also matters, who you are, doesn't it? Some of you may disagree but it's the truth.

Leroy jacked a 7-11 convience store while Mr. Roberts embezzled fifteen million dollars from your company's retirement fund. Leroy got fifteen years. Mr. Roberts got only fifteen months. What's the difference? They both are thieves and deserved to be punished. Don't they?

My name is William Price, 37, widowed with two kids. I became a widow about four months ago when I walked in on my wife and my boss. Larry Jefferson's management skills sucked ass, but his "DADDY", owned the company.

They were grunting and fucking so hard, my presence wasn't noticed. I pulled out my trusty Iphone and started recording. They had their eyes closed, and of course I didn't want to disturb the earlier than need be. I reached under the foot of my bed and retrieved my sliding pump Mossberg 500 with pistol grip.

The sound of chambering one of my 20 gauge, 250 grain, Sabot 5 round headed shotgun shells got the attention of my whore soon-to-be-ex-wife and my soon-to-be-ex-boss asshole Larry Jefferson.

For those of you that haven't seen what a shot gun does to the human body, believe me say it isn't pretty.

Karen was the first to look my way. And Larry, let's just say Karen would have needed to clean up the spill on isle three. I don't think I've ever seen that look before in my life. Larry looked as if his whole life was flashing before him, before he finished he was back to being a toddler and crying like a bitch.

Karen on the other hand just looked down the barrel and started begging. "PLEASE DON'T KILL ME BILL! PLEASE PUT THE GUN DOWN".

Well, being the 'loving husband' that I am I aimed the barrel Larry's balls. They were still attached to his cock which was still embedded in Karen.

"Karen, 'sweetheart, ' I'm not going to kill you. That would be too easy. No dear, what I have planned will last for a life time," I told her.

I pointed at my Iphone, "it's recording as we speak."

"Larry, finish fucking Karen."

When he started to pull out, I popped him on the back of his head with the shotgun's stock. Larry started plowing Karen as if his life depended on it. Oh, it did. I saw Karen inching toward her purse. I knew she kept her Lima .380 in it. When the pistol came out, the shot gun went off. It was two inches from Larry balls. The blast was so loud it caused time to stop, just long enough for Karen to look up at me. Larry fell over and reached for his cock and balls. He would only grasp air because they were gone. Karen got the worst of it, but she tried to lift her hand on more time to take aim at me. The next shot parted her scalp. I called 911 and waited on the cops.

The cops charged me with maiming and attempted murder. Bond was denied. They threw in ten more charges, but those were the two big charges. I would do a minimum of fifteen years if convicted. My attorney concocted an insanity defense. It was taken to the state mental hospital for testing.

My trial date was in six months. I was scared shitless. I just hoped the jury would see it the way I did.

The trial lasted three weeks. On the first day they wheeled Karen in. Karen was still hurting and she was going to make sure I did time.

My attorney changed my plea to self defense. He showed the jury how if Karen had not pulled her gun, it would have run its course and wouldn't have turned our bedroom in to the Wild, Wild West. Karen said she would have killed me. I had no right to threaten her life. Karen said "Yea, I cheated. So fucking what? He had no right to hurt me like this."My attorney just kept right on baiting her. Karen ranted about my working to many hours, and how I wasn't home enough. Thus, she needed to find love elsewhere. And besides she said I was stupid anyway -- one of "Daddy's little girls" isn't daddy's girl. The prosecutor objected to the baiting, but it was too late.

I think Karen's rant is what saved me.

The jury looked at Karen like she was dirt. The prosecutor couldn't wait to get her off the stand. My two babies looked at each other; their sad faces broke my heart. Karen told them to come on or get left. They both sat there and didn't move. She was rolled out. Then both sides rested,

The jury was out for forty-five minutes. I was found NOT GUILTY on the big two charges. The jury foreperson said that from the angle on the Iphone, it looked as if I had the gun pointed down. Also Karen's testimony made them believe she intended to kill me. I was given timed served for three lesser charges.

When I was processed out, I had no idea where I was going. The house was gone because Karen couldn't pay for it. The bank accounts were emptied six months ago. I only had the $200.00 that I had in my pocket when I caught her.

When I walked out of the hospital for the last time, I was surprised by a very pretty young lady. She shook my hand and to me to follow her. I figure my lawyer had sent me a driver. It turns out that she was Larry's wife. I didn't even know the asshole was married. I start to get concerned. She told me to relax. I relaxed as much as I could under the circumstances. She drove me to this huge house in the Barnes-Hills subdivision. Pulling up I saw a welcome home banner.

"WELCOME HOME BILL".

I looked over at the young lady; she smiled and told me to come on. My babies were there. A lot of my friends were there. Even my old high school coach was there. It was truly a festive event.

My lovely driver turned out to be Carolyn Jefferson -- Larry's wife. The company was owned by her dad. Larry was a son, not the son he had lead everyone to believe. Cal, as she like to be called, went on to explain that Karen and Larry were heading back to the hospital.

Karen and Larry disobeyed their doctor's orders and tried to see if their reconstructed reproductive organs worked. In doing so, something had sprung a leak. They both passed away in the hospital. My two baby girls (I don't why I call them babies their 16 and 17) we're sad but relieved at the same time. They didn't what to hurt their mom but they wanted to stay with me.

And for those of you wondering, no we, Cal and I didn't go off and fuck ourselves into oblivion. Nope, that came later. Cal wanted kids, the clock was ticking. We ended up with three little boys.

One night after a few brews, I ended up at Karen grave site. I was planning to piss on it, but I ended up thanking her. If she hadn't been such a bitch/whore/slut, I wouldn't be living the life I am. Also I was going to piss on the grave to because she lied about my babies. They are mine, and I am a proud poppa of five.

Cal and the girls carry on as if Karen never existed. Sometimes at night though I hear them talking. The girls wish their mom was still alive. They miss the woman she was before becoming a lying, cheating, and vindictive monster. Those are the moments I hate because after all, "I'm not an evil man".

*

Thanks to my editor for taking the time to go through this, DAMN IT. I know I can spell and I don't want the Grammar mafia to come after me.

Editor's note: I, MarvinS, am part of the Grammar Mafia! I was critical of Huedogg2's spelling, punctuation, word usage, and other language conventions. I challenged him to allow me to fix up the next story. He was reluctant because a previous editor had changed the meaning of a story too much. I promised I would work on the mechanics only. If I missed something I am sure others of the Grammar Mafia will let me know!