3 comments/ 8262 views/ 2 favorites Feels Like Home By: LukkyKnight It had been a long day, mostly on his feet, but the drive home provided a decompression interval as the music soaked away most thoughts about work. Opening the door more music greeted him - a CD playing in the living room, one of her favorites - so he leaned his head in there while shrugging off his coat. Curled up on the couch, dozing lightly, a book in her loose grip open on her lap - not exactly what he'd expected since she tended to be a night owl. Still, it was a charming sight with her hair spilling down onto her shoulders, and so much better than the years of coming home to an empty dark house. He walked to the kitchen, kicked off the shoes and splashed some cognac into a snifter, taking a sip before returning to the living room. Setting the glass down he gently dislodged the book from her hand - a familiar title, laced liberally with explicit sensual passages - and laid it on the coffee table. Surprised that hadn't awakened her, he settled on one knee in front of the couch, running one hand lightly along her neck hoping the reading had stoked erotic dreams - she stirred slightly, drawing a deeper breath as he leaned it to kiss her lips. That brought an even deeper breath, both eyes opened, and she sighed gently as her mouth came alive. "Mmm, welcome home. You taste good." "Cognac," he replied, bringing his other hand to her face, pulling the kiss firmer. "Sorry I fell asleep. The book had my mind wandering but I didn't want to start without you." "I see." "Do you?" she asked, sliding round to face him, unfolding her legs to either side. "I thought I was being discreet despite devilish urges as I daydreamed. So what did you see, hm?" A coy smile played across her face as she reached for his glass. Taking his cue from the suggestive tone, he let his eyes slide down her body while she shared the drink. "I see you wearing nothing but my shirt, reading salacious literature, and now sipping my cognac..." He reached for the two bottom buttons; none of the others were fastened. "I see every reason to get tipsy and lose track of everything but your skin." He leaned in and kissed her again, hands sliding inside the shirt around her waist. "...and your lips..." his kisses slid across her cheek, just below the ear to the soft heat of her neck, hands spread wide along her sides. "You're overdressed," she offered, tugging his shirt free of his pants. "Lose some clothes." Stealing the snifter from her grasp he stood. A quick sip before handing it back to her, he bent down to shed the socks, then still standing directly in front of her loosed the belt, dropped the zipper, and slid pants and briefs down in one smooth motion. His cock was already reacting, and he raised an eyebrow as she drank with one hand and reached beneath his shirt with the other to caress his balls. "Better," she said playfully, "But you're still buttoned up, while I'm all buttoned down." "Here," she continued handing him the glass, "finish this before I finish with your buttons and I'll overlook it." Matching his tempo with the cognac to her work on his buttons, he took the last big swallow as she undid his final button. As he leaned to set the empty snifter on the end table she kissed his belly and took a firm grasp of his rapidly swelling cock. "Yes, that's better." He took off his glasses, and watch, setting them beside the now empty glass. He took her hand, inviting her to stand, "I've had enough standing for today," he said as he kissed his way down her body and knelt in front of her, slipping his tongue into her navel. "Haven't you?" "Then why did you just stand me up?" she asked coyly. "Good point." Guiding her down to the floor, he settled her on her back, enjoying the view as the shirt fell from her chest, inviting his eyes to drink in her curves as her eyes twinkled in anticipation. Smiling, he straddled her hips and took her face in his hands, then leaned into a hungry kiss. The daydreams and reading must've had some effect - her response was near immediate, hips rising questing from the floor as her body sought more contact. His pubic hair softly tickled her bare lips, causing wriggling as nerves forecast pleasures yet to arrive. "Oh, yes," she replied, as his kisses roved down her neck. She felt his hot breath and whiskers in contrast to the softness of his lips in the notch of her collarbone as his body settled on to hers, pressing her back to the floor firmly. Sometimes, she knew, he would linger there, exciting her neck because it was so sensitive while the rest of her began yearning for his touch, but tonight he moved on quickly, bending to draw a spiral on her breast with his tongue and immediately sucking her nipple deep into the warmth of his mouth. She felt the both nipples stiffen with the unexpected turn of events, but almost immediately the heat was gone and instead it was a cool breeze, an abrupt contrast, and she knew both were puckering as she ran her hands into his hair. "Oh..." Sliding lower, brushing the shirt side, kissing languidly down her side, descending past ribs onto her hip, one hand staying to caress her cheek, it was as if his touches were everywhere at once. She floated, breathing deeply, thinking if she was feline this would demand purring. Legs astride hers, hands flowing along her skin, his kisses and caresses kept right on going down the outside of her thigh. Almost before she realized he was moving, her hands rode his head back toward her belly - his mouth had broken contact as he moved and she guessed he would repeat his attentions symmetrically, exciting her other side. Startling her instead with a short kiss to her already swelling clit, pulling his head back and blowing hotly on her lips, stirring her scent to his nostrils, he felt her hands grasp his, compelling them to hurry to her breasts which they explored together, fingers interlaced. His tongue darted out to flick between her lips as she drew in a ragged breath and prepared herself - he so loved to taste her, bending close again to draw her clit into his lips, to tease her with his tongue as her arousal built, he murmured, "I'll never get enough of you." She shifted her legs wide, re-arranging herself in practiced motion to allow him to settle between her thighs as their hand separated, wanting hair tickling her inner thighs slightly as his attention drove her arousal. She tugged her nipples and felt him nudge her clit again with his hot... oh no, not his tongue, the head of his cock already! Suddenly easing into her, tugging slightly on that first slow stroke, she enjoyed the sense of his stiff cock slipping slowly deeper as she pressed her pelvis toward him... he rocked back slowly and said, "Oh baby, that's my lover..." There were times for lingering foreplay, but she was slick and ready for his tempo tonight. The slippery friction as they united was all either needed to urge them into a steady rhythm. Eyes locked, their bodies accelerated along a dizzying crescendo of desire, mutual arousal mounting quickly. Her legs came around behind him to pull his thrusts in more deeply. He knew her passion even without hearing her gasps; she knew his need was intense and all focused on her. They smiled, and bathed in shared appetite. "Take me deep, baby. Ride me." "Yes, fuck me. Come on, fuck me now," she said, "Come with me, I need you." "Oh yessss, I've always needed what you excite in me." Their tempo increased, their breathing and pulses speeding faster. The room filled with the smell and sound of lovemaking as their bodies pressed to each other -- orgasms arrived quickly and overlapped, drawing inarticulate cries from each of them. The climaxes seemed to linger, and they continued to rock together as the urgency slacked. Then because it just felt so good, so right, so perfect to be making love at home tonight, they settled locked together in the embrace and familiar delight, staring into the eyes of love, laughing with the joy that lasts, collecting themselves while remembering that this home was not a place, but a connection. Home 05: Feels Like Home Tara Myers picked up her five year old son from kindergarten and tried to listen to him chatter about his day as she drove to retrieve the baby from her mother's, but her mind was not on crayons and playground adventures. Rae had not called last night. All night long, Tara had lain on the uncomfortable fold-away bed and stared at the ceiling, trying to convince herself that Rae was so busy handling the new talent that Capital Records had hired that she had not had time to call. She knew her girlfriend was tired. She could hear it in Rae's voice when she did call. Perhaps she had gone back to the hotel after the show and fallen asleep. Rae hadn't called this morning, either. Sometimes, if she woke up before she thought Tara had left to take Will to school, she would call and talk to both of them in the mornings. Tara had kept her phone in her pocket all day, but it had not rang. Rae would now be at the next stop on the state tour with the singer, making certain the stage was ready and that the artist had everything needed. Rae had not said much about the tour or the woman she had been assigned to handle. She called the singer McAllister and said that the girl would be a huge star. She said she was tired of eating on the road and sleeping in strange beds, but that the fans loved McAllister. Rae had stopped asking when Tara and the children were moving to Nashville. Perhaps that disturbed Tara a little bit, too. Will was out of his seat as soon as Tara coasted her car into her parents' driveway. Tara watched him disappear into the house before taking her phone out of her purse. It showed no calls. She opened the phone and dialed Rae's cell phone number. She listened to it ring with an ache in her heart. "You've reached Raegan Hall. Please leave a brief message at the tone and I'll return your call as soon as I am available." Tara struggled to speak over the lump forming in her throat. "Rae, Honey," she began. She could hear the tremble in her voice and feel tears welling behind her eyes. "Baby, it's Tara. You didn't call last night. I miss you. I want to hear your voice. Please call me as soon as you get this message, even if you can't talk long. Rae, I love you." She stayed behind the wheel for a moment longer, forcing the tears away before she faced her mother. Her parents didn't approve of her relationship with Rae. They thought she was going to hell for being gay, but she'd tried to fight her feelings. She'd fought them all through high school and repressed them after marrying Billy Myers. Once, after Billy had returned from hauling goods to Arizona, she had been cleaning out his rig when she found a stash of girly magazines. Instead of being angry with him, curiosity had prevailed. She had flipped through the pictures, feeling her breasts tighten with a need to be touched. Certain that Will was napping and Billy wouldn't be home, she'd crawled into the back of the rig and lay down on the cot where he slept when he was away. Looking at pictures of beautiful naked women, she had slipped her hand into the waistband of her shorts and been startled to find herself wet. The orgasm she gave herself was more satisfying that anything Billy had ever given her. After Billy had died, she had been too numb to think about her sexuality. Seeing Raegan Hall on Thanksgiving had finally ripped her from the haze that had been her existence. Tara remembered staring at Rae in high school. The woman had occupied too many dreams when she was a teenager, and now those dreams were coming true. Her parents refused to accept that Tara had always been gay, but Tara knew the truth about her fantasies. She also knew the truth about her heart. It had always belonged to Raegan Hall. Her parents weren't the only ones who had not reacted well to her pronouncement of love for another woman. Billy's parents were threatening to sue for custody of the children if she took them to Nashville to live in a homosexual household. She thought that she could win the case, but her children were the most precious thing in the world to her. As much as she loved Rae, she was afraid to risk losing Will and Rachel. She kept hoping that Anna and Joe Myers would get used to the idea and cancel the suit, but every time she took the children to see them, she was met with hostility. With a heavy sigh, she slipped out of the car and walked into the house, carrying her pain on her shoulders. Will was sitting on her father's lap, giving Grant Roding the same spiel he had given Tara in the car. She had listened enough to hear him changing little details to make the story better. She waved at her father. His eyes followed her but there was no other reaction. He had been cold and indifferent toward her since the first time that she had brought Rae to the house, but she still held hope that he would eventually accept her lifestyle. She found her mother and daughter in the back room that had been converted into a nursery and playroom when Will was born. Jane Roding was holding Rachel, rocking the tiny baby as she slept. She looked up with a soft smile. "Hi, sweetheart. Little angel just finished her snack." Tara's heart eased a little as she gazed at the tiny round face and the eyelashes fanned on round cheeks. "Any problems today?" "She was as good as gold, weren't you, little angel?" Jane pushed with her foot and sent the rocking chair into a steady motion. "Do you all want to stay for supper?" "No, they are having a birthday party for one of Lacy's daughters, so we're going to Nora's for a cookout," Tara answered casually, reaching for the baby. "Oh," her mother mumbled, giving Rachel to Tara. "You are going to see her family." Tara sighed at the tone of her mother's voice. "They accept me and include me, Mother. I wish you could do the same of Rae." "It's not like I have had the opportunity. When she does come to see you, she doesn't come here. How can I get to know her if she is always in Nashville? Honestly, I don't really understand if she loves you how she stays away." "I'm afraid that's my fault," Tara said wearily, touching her lips to Rachel's brow. "Rae has a job and a house payment to consider. She can't drop everything until Joe and Anna get used to the idea that I'm moving to Nashville. Next time she comes for a visit, we'll come over. Will you make her feel welcome?" Jane pinched her lips angrily and didn't answer. She didn't know if she could welcome her daughter's lover with open arms. "You know, rejecting her is rejecting me. Rae could get tired of waiting and break things off, but it wouldn't change who I am." "Do you think she'll do that?" Jane asked eagerly. "Mother, I know you hear me. Why won't you listen? It doesn't matter if I am living with Rae or not, I am still gay." "You don't suddenly become gay," her mother snapped. "No, I didn't." Tara shook her head and began shoving things into Rachel's diaper bag with one hand. "If this is the conversation we are going to have every day, I will find another babysitter for Rachel. I'm having a hard enough time as it is without my mother beating me up for the way I'm wired." "Your father and I are perfectly normal. God doesn't make gays." "Will," she called as she stormed through the house. "Go to the car." She turned at the doorway and glared at her mother. "I am still your daughter and I still love you, but you can't keep berating who I am. I need your love and support." "Of course we love you, dear," Jane said softly. "Then show it, Mother," Tara commanded. "Say, 'I still love you even though you are gay.'" Tara waited a moment, but when her mother could not form the words, she turned and started toward the car. Will was waiting beside the car with wide eyes. She forced a smile on her face for his benefit. "Come on, son. Let's go see Nanna and Poppa Max." "Tara," the voice behind her was soft. Tara stopped but did not turn to look at her mother. "Bring Rachel tomorrow. I'll try to do better." Tara nodded and continued to the car. She secured Rachel in her car seat and made certain Will had buckled his belt before climbing behind the wheel. When she looked up, her mother was standing beside the door. "I saw Clay Ashe at the store yesterday. You remember Clay, don't you? You went to the prom with him." "And stared at Raegan the whole time," Tara replied. "He's still single. He asked about you." "Mother," Tara stated. "You just can't help yourself, can you? I'll see you in a few days, when things are going better for me." "Don't take those babies away from me." "You made that choice, Mother." Tara cranked the car and backed out of the driveway. She fought tears as she steered her vehicle toward Rae's mother's house. Will did not chatter and she couldn't find her voice to encourage him. She sped up as she thought about being in the arms of Rae's family. She wished that her mother and father could be as open and understanding as Nora and Max Hall. "I don't understand it," Nora had told her once, "but it's who Rae is. What purpose would it serve to isolate her?" By the time they reached the Hall residence, Will had recovered. He was out of the car as soon as she parked and in a moment Tara saw him running through the yard with Lacy's two daughters. She glanced at the screen on her phone and debated calling Rae again. She pushed the re-dial button and listened, but it immediately went to voice mail again. She didn't leave a message, but she breathed a silent prayer for her lover. "Please, be okay, Rae. Call me." She bundled Rachel and walked into the house, bending to kiss Rae's father's cheek on her way into the house. Nora Hall met her at the door. "Give me that grandbaby," she commanded, taking Rachel from Tara's arms. "Come on in the kitchen. Where is Will?" "Last I saw, he was being chased by Megan," she answered as she followed Nora into the warm and friendly kitchen. "Uh-oh," Lacy said. "That's all right. He was chasing Mary. Nora, have you talked to Rae today?" "Today? No, she didn't call today." Nora frowned. "Why do you ask?" Tara lowered her eyes and bowed her head, hoping that the pain on her face was not obvious. Nora patted her shoulder. "She's not called in a couple of days," Tara said with a weary sigh. "Oh, don't worry," Nora assured, "She's busy with this tour, so she just hasn't had time to call. If something was wrong, we would definitely hear from her." "I know you are right, but we've not gone a day without talking since New Year's. I just . . . I just worry that perhaps she has grown tired of waiting for me," Tara reluctantly admitted her deep fear, afraid that giving it voice would mean she was right. "Would you blame her?" Lacy said quietly. "Lacy," Nora snapped. "Mom, I love Tara just as much as the rest of you. I've seen the way that Rae is with her. I've also seen the way that my sister is without her." Weakly, Tara sank into one of the kitchen chairs, her shoulders slumped. "What if she's found someone new?" she whispered. "Oh, now, Tara," Nora said, passing the baby to Lacy. She put her arm around Tara's shoulders. "One thing I know is that Rae loves you. She may be frustrated, but she's not going to let you go too easily." "I want to be with her," Tara insisted. "You have to believe me that I want to be a family with her, but I can't risk losing the children. Oh, why hasn't she called today?" "Maybe you should give her friend Beth a call. She would know if something was wrong on the road that had kept Rae from being able to call. Maybe her phone is broken?" "Beth is not my biggest fan, either," Tara said with a sigh. "She'll call. I know she'll call." She took a deep breath and stood up. "What can I do to help get ready for supper?" Nora smiled and hugged her daughter's partner and attempted to move the conversation on to more cheerful subjects. They ate hamburgers cooked on the grill and birthday cake and Mary opened her presents. The light was fading when Tara loaded Rachel and Will back into the car. Nora handed her Rachel's diaper bag and hugged her warmly. "Rae will call." "I know. I know." She resisted the urge to call again as she drove across town to the small apartment she had rented after her husband's death. She pulled into her parking space and wearily gathered Rachel and the baby's belongings. Will climbed out of the car and clamored up the steps. She followed without looking around. Will carefully worked the key, chewing thoughtfully on his lower lip as he turned the lock. He opened the door and together they walked into the open room. He jumped up to turn on the light while Tara set aside Rachel's bag. "Aunt Rae!" he exclaimed suddenly. Tara turned sharply, holding Rachel to her breast. Rae was lying across the couch, her eyes closed. She didn't budge at Will's excited voice and Tara laid her hand on his shoulder before he could wake her. "But Mom!" "Shh. Go put on your pajamas." She nudged him toward his bedroom and carefully laid Rachel in the bassinet before walking to the couch and gazing into the sleeping face of her lover. Relief and concern competed for attention in her mind and heart as she perched on the edge of the sofa. Her trembling fingers reached out to brush Rae's bangs off her forehead and then lovingly traced the soft skin of her cheek. Relief won and overwhelmed her. Tears started flowing down her cheeks and she put her hand to her mouth in an attempt to contain her sobs. The sound of her crying woke Rae. It took the sleeping woman a moment to remember where she was and for her brown eyes to focus on Tara. She sat up quickly. "Hey, Hey! What's wrong?' She wrapped her arms around Tara, who leaned into the embrace, slipping her arms around Rae's waist. "Shh, honey, shh," Rae whispered, trying to calm her lover. She pushed Tara back and wiped the tears off the girl's cheeks. "What's going on?" "I'm sorry," Tara muttered. "I just . . . what are you doing here?" "Tell me why you are crying first," Rae demanded, her brow creasing. "I feel so silly," she said, ducking her head. "You didn't call last night and you didn't answer your phone today. I've imagined a hundred different reasons why." Because her head was down, Tara missed the uncomfortable expression that crossed Rae's face. "I'm sorry, baby. I didn't have my car charger today. My phone died. Everything's all right." "Why are you here? I thought you had a few more weeks on the tour." Before she could answer, Will emerged from his room wearing Buzz Light-year pajamas. "Aunt Rae!" he called, his bare feet slapping across the floor to the couch. He leapt onto her lap and wrapped his tiny arms around her neck. "Did you come to tuck me in tonight?" "I sure did, buddy, because I missed you so much." "I've missed you, too. Mommy said you were working and it would be a long time before you could come see us again." "I couldn't stand it any longer. I needed hugs and kisses." Will giggled and obliged before launching into his litany about his day. Tara slipped away while her girlfriend spent time with her son. Her heart filled with love and tenderness as she watched the duo interact. Tara felt Rae's eyes on her the moment her lover emerged from Will's bedroom. She had changed into a short, lacy gown that she had been saving for a special occasion with Rae. She was straightening the blankets on the sofa bed, her back to the little boy's room. Knowing she had Rae's attention, she bent slowly, stretching across the bed to smooth the opposite side. She felt the gown rise, revealing her silky thighs and round bottom. She glanced over her shoulder, casting a teasing smile at her lover before climbing onto the bed. She turned to her back, propping herself on her elbows and raising one leg so the gown slid to her waist. Rae closed the distance quickly, placing her knee on the bed and her hands on either side of Tara's head as she maneuvered over her lover. Their lips met softly at first, tenderly tasting and touching. Rae lowered herself into a comfortable position without releasing the kiss. She held Tara's head in her hands, her fingers combed through her lover's long blonde hair. Tara's hands moved over Rae's shoulders and back, affirming that the woman was really there and in her arms. Tara's fingers began bunching the material of Rae's shirt, her fingertips longing for the feel of her girlfriend's flesh. Her nails scratched along Rae's back and her fingers counted Rae's vertebra as their kisses deepened. Rae's tongue was exploring inside Tara's mouth and Tara was hungrily meeting each advance, her tongue dipping into Rae's mouth. Their tongues twirled and dueled as they tasted one another. Rae sat up enough for Tara to remove her shirt but immediately resumed the devouring kisses. Rae mover her hand to Tara's thigh, sliding up the smooth flesh to push the gown further up. Her hand came to rest on Tara's hip as she bit and sucked on Tara's lower lip. Tara's trembling fingers worked free the clasps on Rae's bra. She pulled the cups free from Rae's small breasts, her hands cupping and squeezing the exposed globes. Her thumbs rubbed Rae's nipples, rotating over and massaging the hard pebbles. Rae moaned into Tara's mouth. Her lips moved along Tara's jaw line and nibbled her lover's earlobe. Tara squeezed Rae's nipples between her fingertips, tugging lightly on the sensitive buttons. Rae's hand continued pushing upward, her fingers moving over Tara's flat belly. Tara's heavy breasts were swollen with milk and sensitive from Rachel nursing. As soon as Rae's fingers brushed against Tara's nipples, Tara arched her body and moaned deeply. Rae's lips moved down Tara's neck, nipping and tugging with her teeth and soothing with her tongue. Both women were breathing heavily as Rae's fingertips skirted along the edge of Tara's panties. Tara opened her legs as Rae pushed aside the cotton material and slipped her fingers between Tara's slick lips. Rae's quickly found Tara's sensitive clit and began rubbing it in a steady rhythm. Tara inhaled sharply, her whole body arching upward. She moaned deeply. "Oh, Raegan." Rae shifted so she could watch her lover's face. She wore a smile as her fingers continued their assault. "I love it when you saw my name," she whispered huskily, her fingers moving from Tara's tender button to her deep canal. She pushed two fingers inside and began gliding in and out in quickening strokes. She placed her thumb on Tara's clit, causing dueling sensations to rocket through her lover's small frame. "Darling," Tara groaned, her hungry body rocking in time to Rae's unrelentless attack. "Oh, yes, Rae." Because of the children, her volume remained low, but her sounds of pleasure were continuous. She alternated between begging Rae to stop and pleading with her to never cease. "Raegan, Raegan, Raegan." Rae smothered Tara's cries with her mouth as she increased the intensity of her attack. She added a third finger and quickened her pace, knowing her lover's body was close to climaxing. Tara tensed, arching her back as every muscle in her body spasmed. "Raegan," she sighed one last time as she collapsed back. Rae smiled warmly, brushing a sweaty strand of hair from Tara's forehead and kissing her softly. "I love you," Tara whispered, her eyes closed. Rae dropped another kiss on Tara's cheek. "I know." She pulled blankets over them and pulled Tara close. She inhaled deeply, not just smelling her lover but also the aromas associated with the children in the house. To Rae, those smells had come to mean home. Tara woke the next morning to the smell of muffins baking. She stretched, smiling as her body ached in the familiar spots that said Rae's presence had been real last night and not just another vivid dream. She heard Rae's soft voice followed by her son's answer. He was talking about muffins and soccer and the playground at school. Tara sighed in contentment and settled comfortably into the blankets. When Rachel woke, Tara started to sit up, but heard Rae making her way across the room to the bassinet. Rae bent over the side of the crib, talking to the baby before picking her up. When she turned, her eyes landed on Tara, who rewarded her with a sleepy smile. "Well, good morning, sleepy head," she greeted, leaning over to touch her lips to Tara's. "Good morning," Tara answered. "I could wake up like this for the rest of my life." She turned her head to glance at the clock so she missed the curious expression that flashed across Rae's face. Her eyes widened and she sat up. "Oh my goodness, why did you let me sleep so late?" Home 05: Feels Like Home "It's all right, princess," Rae assured. "Will's ready for school. I'll take him while you get ready. What time do you work today?" Tara relaxed a little, taking the squirming baby from Rae's arms. She shrugged the arm of the negligee to expose her breast and immediately Rachel latched onto the swollen nipple. "I have to be there at 8:30, but I can call in sick." "That's all right. I have some errands I need to take care of today, anyway, but is it all right if we get my mom to keep the kids this evening so we can be alone?" "Your mother will love that," Tara replied, her voice dropping to an intimate register, "and so will I." Rae leaned down for another kiss, the touch carrying the love and tenderness she felt for her girlfriend. "I'll take Will to school and see you this afternoon, then. I love you." She disappeared from Tara's vision, shooing Will into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He obeyed immediately. Tara leaned back, enjoying the time to allow Rachel to nurse while Rae took care of the normal morning stress. The thought that it could always be that way touched her mind, but fear chased it away. "Honey," she said with caution in her voice. Rae mumbled in response. "I thought you were in the middle of a tour. What are you doing here?" Rae did not answer immediately. Tara listened as dishes rattled. Finally, Rae replied, "We'll talk about it this evening, baby." The answer did not satisfy Tara, but she knew she had to accept it for now. It haunted her the rest of the day. Rae's words nagged at her brain during every lull of the day. It gnawed at her heart and threatened to turn her stomach. Time took turns crawling about as she anticipated an evening alone with her lover and speeding by as she dreaded what Rae had to say. Her mother had been waiting when she dropped off Rachel that morning and had seemed relieved to see her. They didn't talk about anything but the baby's needs for the day. When Tara got off work, Rae was standing in the employee parking lot, leaning against her car. Tara almost broke into a run for her lover's arms. Instead, she added a little skip to her step in order to get there quicker. Rae opened her arms and Tara stepped into the warm embrace. Their kiss spoke volumes about where their thoughts had lingered during the day and their anticipation of what the night would hold. Tara was breathless when she stepped away. "Hi," she whispered. "Did you have a good day?" Rae asked, her arms looped loosely around Tara's waist. Tara leaned against her lover, stretching up to receive another kiss. "It was long, thinking of you being so close to me. You've never been in town when I've had to be at work all day. Did you get your errands done?" "I did. Your breasts are huge." "Rachel is hungry." Instead of getting in the car so they could go retrieve their children, though, they enjoyed another long, intimate kiss, their mouths' hungry against each other's lips and their tongues dueling frantically. They didn't break the kiss until they heard someone clear their throat. Tara broke away and smiled bashfully at the man standing nearby with a frown on his face. "Hi, Jack. Honey, this is my manager. Jack, this is my . . ." Tara lifted her eyes to Rae's expectant face, "This is the woman I love, Raegan Hall." "I've heard a lot about you," Jack said stiffly. "You've taken good care of my family," Rae replied. "I'm grateful." "I'll see you tomorrow," he mumbled to Tara, moving to his car. Rae looked into Tara's face. "He's handsome." Tara stretched up for a final kiss. "Let's go get our babies." Rae opened the car door for Tara and they headed across town to pick up Will from school. Tara expertly wove the car through the suburban streets to her parents' house. Will immediately scrambled out of the car, but Rae stayed still in the front seat, staring at the small house. "Come in with me," Tara whispered. "Baby, do you really think that is a good idea?" "Will has already announced that you are here. I want my parents to get used to the idea of you in my life." She leaned across the console so they could kiss gently. "We'll be strong for each other, babe." She smiled softly, touching Rae's cheek. "I love you being here with me." Tara turned to get out of the car, so she again missed Rae's expression. Reluctantly, Rae also emerged from the vehicle. She adjusted her sunglasses on her face and slowly walked around the small automobile. She inhaled deeply and took Tara's hand. Together they walked to the house. Grant Roding immediately rose from his chair and walked out of the living room when he saw his daughter with her girlfriend. Tara's shoulders dipped a little at her father's refusal to attempt to accept Rae, but then she took a deep breath and stood up straight to face her mother. They found Jane Roding in the nursery. Will was on his knees in the floor making faces at his baby sister while Jane tucked the baby's belongings into the diaper bag. "We had such a good day today," Jane said without looking at them. "She ate well and took a good nap and. . ." As she turned and caught sight of Rae, her voice stopped and her face fell. "Hello, Raegan." "Mrs. Roding, it's good to see you again." Rae extended her hand. Jane stared at it for a moment, and then reluctantly shook it, plastering a smile across her face. "My friends call me Rae. You should, too." "Rae," Jane repeated. She pulled her hand away quickly and resumed packing Rachel's bag. "Clay Ashe called today. He asked for your number. He may call tonight." "My phone will be off the hook tonight," Tara replied. She bent to pick up Rachel, cooing softly to her daughter. "I'm glad you were a good girl for Grandma, today. Are you ready to spend the night with Nanna and Poppa Max?" "We're spending the night with Nanna and Poppa Max?" Will repeated. He jumped up and down excitedly. "Yippee! Poppa Max always makes me popcorn and lets me stay up late." "Go on out to the car, buddy, so we can go get your things. I know Nanna and Poppa Max are just as excited to see you." He skipped out of the room and Tara turned on her mother. "You promised to try." "Why are they spending the night at the Hall's?" Jane asked, ignoring her daughter's accusations. "Because I'm going to take my girlfriend home and do things to her that are still illegal in some states," Tara spat back. "And I'd prefer to be alone to do it tonight, because when she rocks my world, I want to scream to God my thankfulness for putting her in my life." Tara spun on her heel and walked out of the house, leaving her shocked mother and stunned girlfriend in her wake. Rae looked apologetically at Jane, then shrugged her shoulders helplessly and followed Tara to the car. Tara was buckling Rachel into her car seat. She jumped when she turned and saw Rae standing beside her. Tara wiped at the tears glistening in her eyes. Rae grinned, placing her hands on Tara's hips. She pressed a firm kiss to Tara's lips. "That was hot as hell, baby." Tara laughed, relaxing against Rae. She turned her face up. "You think so?" "Yeah, I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to wait until tonight to make love to you, I want you so badly right now." Tara lifted her arms to Rae's shoulders, stepping closer to her girlfriend as she parted her lips expectantly. "I love you," she whispered before their lips touched in a deep, intimate kiss sparked by Tara's passionate pledge and anticipation of the fulfillment later. "Waiting will just make it all the sweeter," she promised before slipping out of Rae's arms. Rae groaned in mock frustration as she walked around the car and slid into the passenger's seat. Will started talking about what he would do with Poppa Max as soon as Tara started the car, distracting them from their desire for one another. They linked their fingers across the console and allowed Will to entertain them, but even that faint touch felt electrified. The evening was filled with teasing touches and longing glances. They took the children to Rae's parents' house and went to a private club for dinner. In the dim light of the restaurant, every accidental brush of their thighs and occasional touch of their hands reminded them of their desire for one another. On the drive back to Tara's apartment, she leaned across the console, her body hugging Rae's arm as her partner expertly steered through the streets of the small town. Tara's lips nibbled along Rae's jaw line and neck and her hand slid up and down Rae's thigh. Every time Rae came to a stop, she turned to meet Tara's lips. They ran up the steps of the apartment building, giggling as Rae fumbled with the lock. As soon as the door was closed behind them, they launched themselves into one another's arms. Rae leaned against the door as Tara pushed hungrily against her. Their lips were locked desperately, their tongues wrapped in a frantic duel of tasting and taunting. Tara nipped and bit and sucked at Rae's lips, pulling her body far enough away to unbutton Rae's shirt. Rae responded by working on the fastener to Tara's skirt. Tara casually batted Rae's hand away and resumed opening her lover's shirt. Rae slid her hands over Tara's back as their kiss continued, her fingers freeing Tara's shirt from the waistband. Tara shrugged from Rae's embrace and broke the kiss long enough for a teasing smile. She pushed Rae's blouse off her shoulders and took both of the woman's wrists in her hands, pinning them together above Rae's head. Keeping Rae's hands prisoner, Tara moved her mouth down Rae's neck, trailing her lip along her lover's collar bone. She made a trail over the cup of Rae's bra, burying her face in the shallow valley. Rae leaned her head against the door and slouched, a willing prisoner to Tara's voracious assault. Tara used her mouth to push the cups of Rae's bra aside. Her lips latched onto one small breast. She suckled and massaged the pliable flesh with her lips, her tongue dancing around and over the pebbly nipple. Rae was breathing harder, moaning softly as Tara switched from one globe to another. Tara released Rae's hands, her fingers working to free the belt loop of her lover's slacks. Rae pressed her palms against the door, using the leverage to stay on her feet as Tara's hungry mouth devoured more of her breast. "Oh, baby, whatever has gotten into you, don't stop," Rae whispered as Tara's mouth made its way down her flat stomach. Her tongue danced around Rae's navel as her hands pushed Rae's pants down. Rae kicked them away and inhaled sharply when Tara knelt in front of her and planted a kiss on her sensitive mound. Rae trembled and bit her lip as Tara's tongue darted inside. Tara immediately found Rae's swollen clit. Her tongue flicked it, danced around it, rubbed it, and massaged it, until Rae felt like a helpless puddle. Her body trembled and throbbed with each delicious movement of her lover's mouth. She struggled to remain upright, all her strength focused on the task as Tara taunted and teased her body. Rae's hips bucked forward, riding the wave that Tara created. Tara slipped her tongue into Rae's slick canal, thrusting in and out as Rae rocked forward and back. She tossed her head from side-to-side, her body a tingling mass of desire and lust that finally exploded with a cry of release that echoed off the walls of the apartment. Rae's strength left her and she slid weakly down the door. Tara sat back, wiping her chin with the back of her hand and grinning like the Cheshire cat. She leaned forward and kissed Raegan's lips, her tongue swirling deeply into her lover's mouth. Rae pulled back a little and eyed Tara. "Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?" She felt Tara smile against her lips but not release them. "I guess I've spent too many nights alone in my bed thinking about what I wanted to do to you," she whispered. She stood, reaching for Rae's hands and pulling her lover to her feet. Their mouth's remained fused as they crossed to the sofa. She pushed Rae's shoulder and the taller woman fell onto the cushions. She reached for Tara, attempting to pull her girlfriend into her arms, but Tara easily eluded Rae's grasp. Tara smiled coyly and pulled her blouse free from the waistband of her skirt. She reached behind her and unhooked her bra, revealing her pale, full breasts with hard pink nipples. Rae licked her lips and sat back to enjoy the show, knowing that Tara would not stay out of reach long. Tara finished unhooking the buttons of her skirt and with a wiggle of her hips, slithered out of it. Certain she had Rae's full attention, she shimmied out of her lace panties. Rae stretched her hands toward Tara, who inched forward and sat on Rae's lap, straddling her lover's hips. They kissed again, less aggressive and more tender than before, while their hands roamed over each other's bodies. They caressed shoulders and arms and thighs. They tickled bellies. They cupped and squeezed breasts, their touches growing more forceful as their lust intensified. Rae's mouth latched onto Tara's breast, teeth and lips scraping and biting. Tara inhaled and moaned, wrapping her arms around Rae's head. Her hips started rising and falling, creating an electric charge between their two bodies that sparked with every down thrust. Rae maneuvered her hand between their bodies and her fingertips played at Tara's opening. She pushed two fingers inside and rested her thumb against Tara's clit, allowing Tara's writhing body to do the true work. Tara rocked and thrust, pushing her body higher. Rae's fingers slid in and out of her lover, her mouth suckling and consuming. Tara answered each thrust with a little yelp, the sound growing louder and sharper as her passion built. Tara dropped her hand, working her fingers into Rae's pussy and matching the rhythm of Rae's lovemaking. Rae growled against her breast and they both quickened their pace. Tara's fingers squeezed and pulled on Rae's clit as Rae pushed her fingers in and out of Tara's tunnel. They couldn't tell where one ended and the other began physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. Attuned to each other, Tara threw her head back and cried out. Rae's voice joined Tara's and their song of love filled the room. As they descended, Rae shifted and lay Tara back on the couch. She hovered over her lover, smiling down at the small, delicate body. Her mouth moved slowly, her tongue licking the inside of Tara's thighs before delving into the depths of slick, sensitive lips. She flicked and rubbed with her tongue, finding all of Tara's secret spots. Tara responded immediately, opening her body for her lover as the wave quickly built and crested. They lay together afterwards, their bodies glistening with sweat as they struggled to control their gasping breath. Their arms and legs were entwined and it was impossible to tell which limb belonged to whom. They fell asleep like that and sometime during the night, they woke long enough to pull out the bed and make tender love again, the aggression exchanged for soft whispers and warm sighs and gentle touches. After they both came, they slept peacefully again, their bodies sated and their souls content. Tara woke alone. She stretched her aching body and sat up, looking over her shoulder to smile at Rae. Still naked, she climbed out of bed and walked across the room to where her girlfriend sat at the kitchen table. Rae smiled as Tara came to her, slipping onto her lap. Their kiss was brief. "I called Mom. The kids are fine and Pop took Will to school," she said. Tara rubbed her thumb along Rae's bruised lips, her arm around her girlfriend's shoulders. "This is nice," she whispered, resting her forehead against her partner's. "How long do you get to stay?" Rae kissed Tara again, patting the smaller woman's bare bottom. "Go put on a robe, baby. I get distracted when you're naked." Tara hesitated a moment before standing, her thoughts toying with the idea of diverting Rae's attention from the conversation they needed to have. She could tell by Rae's eyes that she might not like what her lover had to say. Reluctantly, she stood, their fingers pulling apart slowly. Rae stood and fixed Tara a glass of juice while Tara pulled her silk robe over her naked body. Tara suddenly wished she had time to get dressed. She felt defenseless. Rae was leaning against the kitchen counter, staring into a mug of coffee as she attempted to order her thoughts. Tara remained standing, her arms folded around her waist in protection. "Do you remember Sydney Raines?" Rae said at last. Tara nodded once. "Syd was my first girl, you know. She was comfortably with her sexuality even back then. She gave me the courage to face my own desires." Tara brows came together in puzzlement, but she didn't interrupt Rae's words, sensing that Rae needed time to form her sentences. "That was my errand yesterday. I went to see Syd. She's a lawyer now and specializes in family law. In fact, she specializes in gay family law, even though that's not a category. She's drafted palimony agreements and even helped a few gay couples decide who got the dog when the relationship didn't work. Where she has done the most work is in gay adoption, though. In fact, she and her girlfriend have adopted three children." Tara shifted uncomfortably, knowing where the conversation was headed. She still did not say anything, so Rae continued. "I explained our situation to her. She said that even the most conservative judge would not take children away from their natural mother, no matter what the circumstances were, as long as the children were healthy and not being abused." Tara wiped at tears on her cheeks and Rae crossed to her, holding Tara's elbows in her trembling hands as she continued to talk. "All we have to do is prove we are providing a stable, loving home for the children. If we do that, Billy's parents can't take Will and Rachel away from us." Tara inhaled deeply, wiping her eyes as she attempted to speak. Rae's hands caressed softly, moving over Tara's shoulders and arms in an attempt to comfort and assure her girlfriend. "What if she is wrong?" Tara whispered. "She's paid big bucks not to be wrong," Rae answered. "I trust Syd; I know she'll fight for us. She said we should go ahead and move you to Nashville, that way we can request a Nashville judge. It seems we run a better chance of getting a sympathetic judge in Nashville." "You said that wouldn't matter." "We need to stack the cards in our favor, sweetheart." Rae had released Tara and was pacing as she talked, her words coming quicker as her excitement grew. "Also, we establish a home life for the children. No matter what, a social worker will want to check out our home. They will need to do drop in visits to make certain we are providing the proper environment. A social worker from Nashville will be more likely to go in our favor, too, even though no social worker would find a problem with the type of home we can provide. Will and Rachel will everything they need physically and emotionally. I love those kids so much." "I know you do," Tara said, but her voice was shaky and soft. Rae didn't pay attention. "We need to do everything we can to assure Billy's parents that we aren't going to let the children forget them. I'll never be their daddy. I want your wedding pictures and pictures of Will and Billy around the house. We'll need to let him call them on a regular basis. If they see we aren't going to keep him from them, then they may even drop the suit. What do you think, sweetheart? When can you move? If you need to work out a notice, that's fine." For the first time since she had begun talking, Rae turned to focus fully on Tara. Tara was leaning against one of the kitchen chairs, her hand pressed to her lips. Tears flowed freely and she was shaking her head. Rae went to her, sliding her arms around her girlfriend, but Tara stepped away. "I can't," she whispered. Home 05: Feels Like Home "I know this is a huge step for you. I know you've lived here your whole life, but you'll love Nashville, baby. Our house is beautiful and there's a good school just a mile away. We can go to the theater and take the kids to museums. It's going to be a good life." "I can't," Tara repeated. "I'm so sorry. I can't." She gulped, trying to pull air into her lungs, but the sobs only came harder. "I love you, but my children are my whole life. I can't risk it." "Sydney said we would win." "She can't know that, and I can't take the chance that I will lose my children." She laid her trembling hand on Rae's cheek as she sobbed. Tears started flowing down Rae's face as the impact of Tara's words hit her. "I bought us a house," she stated, her voice weak. Tara was crying so hard that she couldn't answer. She wrapped her arms around Rae's shoulders and clung to her lover. "Is this it, then?" Rae asked, not wanting to hear the answer. "I can't . . . I can't keep living the way we are, now. I love you too much to not have you with me." "I'm sorry," Tara repeated. "I'm sorry." Fury grabbed Rae. She pushed away from Tara. "I bought a house for you," she reiterated. "Jamie called and wanted to come home. Jamie, who I spent seven years of my life with. I never wanted to hurt Jamie, but because of you, I did." Rae began grabbing her belongings and throwing them into her duffel bag. She angrily buttoned her shirt and jerked on her jeans. "I turned Erin McAllister down. I had her in my arms and I turned her down. She slapped me and told me to go fuck myself and to get the hell off her tour. It may cost me my job, but I turned her down because I'm in love with you and thought you were in love with me." "I do love you," Tara insisted, her voice raw. Rae stopped on her way out the door, her gaze a mixture of fire and ice that wounded Tara deeply, and then slammed the door behind her. Tara, sobbing and heartbroken, collapsed onto the cold floor.