12 comments/ 19777 views/ 9 favorites When One Door Closes... Ch. 02 By: Scorpio44a [The betrayal is over, the divorces final, more than twenty lives ruined and we've moved three times. The four of us share our lives and our beds. Carol and Jenny are bi and act like it. Mike and I enjoy loving them both. It has been a little over three years since Pat was served divorce papers.] This began as a Loving Wives story and included betrayal, coitus, anal sex, blow jobs, and retribution. Somewhere in the original story Jenny saw an opening into Pete's heart and life, chose the direct approach, through his libido. Being a man the direct approach got his attention and helped him redirect his life. Jenny's sister and sister's husband were very helpful as well. At the end of the original story a Commitment ceremony had united the four as a Quad or whatever you call a committed polyamorus relationship of four people. They each wore rings signifying their commitments. They had sold their various homes and their bid had been accepted to buy a restaurant and make it their home. Oh yes, at the end of the story I introduced the name of a new character, Lee. Some of my readers became upset with that introduction. Some others have read other stories of mine in which Lee is a main character (See "It's Started in the Rain" chapters 1 through 6) and they wrote hoping Pete and his family don't get folded into Lee's family. Well, to be fair, some wrote excited at that possibility. Chapter two explores what happened after Lee met Mike and the rest of the family. "Jenny, I can't find my new shirt." I said. I turned around and my naked wife was standing there holding a hanger with the shirt on it. She smiled and said, "I ironed a shirt that says "No Iron" inside the collar. I did it because I want you to look good." "Why? You'll be with me and no one will look at me. You will be who they all look at." "You want me to stand with Mike so you look better?" "Hell no! I want you next to me, touching me as we walk, hooking my arm as we speak to people and patting my ass when you need to leave me and go to the ladies room." I took the shirt and put it on. She took the hanger back to the laundry area. I sat on our bed and looked across our newest home; Fifty-five feet by one hundred eighteen feet of what used to be a seafood restaurant. We got a zoning variance so we could turn it into a home. Then we spent twelve thousand having it really cleaned. I didn't make that statement strong enough. We spent twelve thousand dollars having the place REALLY CLEANED! It was August fifteenth when they were finished cleaning. We closed all the windows and doors and left it closed and locked for a week where the low temperature was seventy-eight at night and over a hundred every day. I knew if the place was going to smell, it would when I opened the door. It didn't. The walls of the house were mostly brick and mostly those were the exterior walls. When we bid on the place I had measured the outside of the building. 55X118. When Mike and Carol came to measure their numbers didn't mesh with mine. We discovered that we had an outer wall, eight inches of insulation and an inner wall. Our home was 53X116 inside. The inner wall had openings for utility access and the space between walls was where all the utilities ran. We agreed not to have actual walls inside. An actual wall would go up to the ceiling. All four of us loved the domed open beam ceiling of the place. We haunted lighting stores for weeks before we found lighting we all loved. I think we bought our electrical contractor a Porsche' with the money we paid for the changes he made. We bought the building next door that had been a retail space and made it our four-car garage. When the restaurant died the retail died with it. We got both buildings and land for under six hundred thousand. We worked long hours and many weeks to get the house as we wanted it. Since the building had all the windows up high we could work most of the time in the house naked, so we did. There's something sexy about a woman working in a tool belt and work boots, with her everything-else exposed. In late August my cell phone rang while all four of us were together. That was unusual, we had mostly been using our cells to communicate with whoever was out buying things, or getting dinner, or something like that. I looked at the ID and it said, "Pat Peterson." I wondered which Pat Peterson, my ex or the woman we met almost a year before at Lee's. I answered to get the answer. It was the Pat from Lee's. She said, "Are you angry with us?" "How could I be? Have you done something that you think I would be angry if I knew about it?" "No, but the last time we saw any of you was in April! Soooo, I decided to invite you to Lee's for a party." "That's redundant. Lee's is a party. Ok. When?" "Tomorrow. It's graduation day for Lee's latest two squids." "Henry and Mark?" I asked. "You see? You've been gone so long you've never met the two who replaced Henry and Mark. These two are Art and Buck. Buck has a name but would rather be known as Buck." "Pat, what can we bring? Does either guy need anything?" "Buck has been saving up for a laptop. Lee offered him one, but he said he wanted to earn it. Can you help him earn one?" "I'll find a way." We ended the call. I said, "Either you or I need to go shopping. Lee's squid goes back to Mugu in two days and he needs a laptop. We're giving him one." Mike started cleaning up and I said, "Get two. He has two squids graduating tomorrow." Mike got kisses from both women and then Jenny decided she wanted to go with him. She put enough clothes on to avoid being arrested and kissed me good-Bye as she hooked Mike's arm and they left. I heard Mike's truck start and I smiled. Mike bought a huge pick-up truck shortly after we became a family. When either Jenny or Carol went for a ride one of us had to help her up into the truck. We did it with a hand on her bare butt and they made appreciative noises. They came back with two high-end laptops. Computers with nearly indestructible cases, huge hard drives and lots of bells, whistles and testosterone. Our wives wrapped them in plain brown paper and sealed the packages in duct tape. Mike and I pronounced them very manly. Then we all laughed. Mike and I are serious about being men, but not so serious we can't laugh at being "manly" sometimes. I called Pat back and asked, "What do our squids know how to do?" "Buck and Art were painters in Iran. They were hurt while they painted the inside of a school. Art's right leg caught a few exploding bricks and Buck caught shards of glass and brick. Both are healed enough to go back to duty. They want to go back and finish painting the school." I said, "Good. We have some painting that needs completion. We'll have them... no. Can they come over now? I'm sure they can have the painting done by noon tomorrow if they'll spend the night here." "Let me talk to them and I'll call you right back." Pat said. I told the family what was the new plan and all four of us started preparations for their arrival and starting work. Mike said, "If they're spending the night we need to get a couple of those good blow up beds. Our beds are too close together for them." "I don't know about that." Carol said. "Last time we were at Lee's a squid was firmly attached to Rina's chest, right in front of everyone." "That may be so, but I'm not into being watched." Mike said. "And, I'm not into sharing Carol or Jenny with two squids we haven't even met!" The phone rang. Pat said, "Give me your new address. I'll have them delivered. Do you have work for more hands? We have willing hands who would love a challenge." One quick look told me we were about to have a work party. "Pat, We can use a clean-up crew, a tile setter, a couple of furniture movers and anyone else who wants to come." "Do they need to bring work clothes?" "It's easier to clean skin." "I'll tell them." I gave our address. Jenny decided we'd order food delivered when the time came. Mike and Carol went out again and bought three more beds and a stack of blankets, pillows and sheets . Less than an hour later Lee stopped out in front and brought Art, Buck, Megan, Fran and Bonnie inside. Introductions were made and work assignments made. Somehow I became foreman. I showed Art and Buck what needed painting and gave them Fran and Megan as helpers. Bonnie and Jon needed no supervision. They found trash bags, dustpans and brooms and went to work. Jenny went back to putting tile down in the big bathroom with Mike. Carol was up on a ladder washing windows. Lee took my car and left me his mini-van. When the rhythm of our work had been established Mike turned on the stereo. The music that played was a collection of mostly exercise music, both new and oldies. The first song set the tone for the afternoon. It was "Jump!" by the Pointer sisters. Clothes came off. People sang, danced, worked and laughed. At a little after six the work was done. The floors were tiled, cleaned and looked good. All the kitchen cabinets were painted inside and coated with polyurethane on the outside. Art and Buck found me holding the ladder for Carol and asked, "Ok. What's next?" Carol said, "Next is dinner. We were going to get food delivered, but I've changed our minds. Everyone gets cleaned up and we're going out." Megan said, "We just wore grubbies." "Fine. We aren't going to Spago's." Carol announced. They went to find clothes. I asked, "Where are we going?" Carol smiled and said, "I heard Art and Buck say they wanted to go home on leave but couldn't. What they miss is bar-b-que from home. Home is Texas." "Famous Dave's!" I said. "Yup. We'd better dress." Fifteen minutes later we were on the road. When we got to Long Beach we blindfolded both squids. Jenny said, "The first one who tells us where we're eating gets a special prize." She had two laptops ready as prizes. I made the turn and stopped the mini-van at the curb. Bonnie slid the door open and Art took a deep breath. "Oh my God! It's bar-b-que!" He tore off the blindfold and said, "I've heard of this place!" Buck was one step behind him, out the door and aimed at the double front doors. Jenny carried the prizes and we all followed them inside. Two hours later racks of ribs, a couple of chickens, a brisket, corn, biscuits and slaw were gone and we awarded them their wages, prizes for their work. Buck opened his package slowly and suddenly was speechless. Art unwrapped his and said, "This is the greatest gift I've ever gotten." He said it softly, almost reverently. Buck nodded. I paid the bill and left a good tip. I drove them to Lee's house. Jenny called from the road and Lee convinced her that we were staying the night. Bonnie sat beside Art and Fran sat next to Buck on the way home. Carol and Mike squeezed into the farthest back seat with Buck and Fran. Jenny sat shotgun, seatbelted in with Megan. All the conversation until we hit Malibu was in whispers. The noises of kissing and moans of mouth to body contact were mixed with the whispers. At Topanga Canyon and PCH I asked, "Bonnie, I need your help finding Lee's. Help me please." She broke her lip lock with Art and re-focused on getting us to Lee's. The outside lights were on. I parked and we unloaded the mini-van. Fran carried Buck's clothes and her own. Buck carried his laptop. I wondered if he was hard for Fran or the laptop. I wasn't going to ask. Lee showed Carol, Mike, Jenny and me to a bedroom with a king-sized bed and a private bath. A sign on the door said, "Private party, Knock before entering. Pete , Jenny, Mike & Carol." I knocked. Lee said, "The sign is for others, not your family. Enjoy the night. The pool is warm, hot tub is going and the kitchen is open." He kissed Carol and Jenny then left us. Jenny opened the door, took off her clothes, hung them over a chair and asked me, "Wanna relax in the hot tub, Lover?" She helped me undress and led me out to the hot tub. There were four people in the water up to their shoulders. Lee, Connie, Jon and Pat. Jenny asked, "May we join you?" "Of course." Lee said. "Mi casa..." We stepped in and all but submerged in the bubbling water. Lee asked if the squids got their laptops. We confirmed they had divided loyalties at the moment, laptops and beautiful lovers. After about half an hour Connie convinced Lee that she needed his "help" in the bedroom. Pat and Jon decided they wanted an intimate conversation. Jenny asked if I wanted her there, on a couch or in the bed in our room. We started for the bedroom but hesitated in the living room and joined there on the floor. I put a towel under us before either of us lost a significant amount of fluids. Mike and Carol were asleep when we joined them in bed. The odors in the bedroom gave testimony to their pre-sleep joining. Sometime before dawn Mike got up to pee and when he came back he woke Jenny. She felt inspired and woke Carol and me. I got sucked and played with Carol's body until she came. Mike and Jenny joined, with Mike in the lotus position and Jenny impaled in his lap. Carol and I duplicated their pose and rocked in rhythm until all four of us came in joy. The bedside clock showed 0911 when I opened my eyes later. I heard noises out in the rest of the house. Carol opened her eyes and said, "Every time we do it here it's a spiritual experience." Jenny said, "Every time." We all kissed and got up. In the shower we got clean, shaved and teeth brushed. Lee is so thoughtful. In our bathroom were four new toothbrushes, marked with our names. We left the bedroom and headed for the kitchen. Art was on the couch with his laptop in his lap. Bonnie was feeding him bites of breakfast from her plate. In the kitchen Buck was making food for anyone. His laptop was open and while he worked he typed on the keyboard. When he saw us he said, "If we painted your entire house, inside and out, we would not have earned these." Jenny went to him, turned him away from both stove and computer and kissed him with her entire body. When it broke she said, "You earned it by being the man you are. You earned it in Iran. You earned it by not giving up. It's our way of saying Thank you." Tears filled his eyes and he turned back to the stove while maintaining contact with Jenny. He served us eggs with bell peppers, onions, cheese, cilantro and pepper, with sausage, pancakes and hot coffee on the side. When he served Carol she pulled him close and kissed him completely. When it ended he held his hands, palms together in front of him and said, "Thank you." The prayer was repeated and he got hugs from everyone in the kitchen. As we ate Lee came to the kitchen. I offered him food from my plate or my plate. He said he had eaten and needed to talk to us. I motioned to a chair. He sat and Art set a cup of coffee in front of him. He said, "Last week Rina brought someone here to the house. Rina has known her for six months. She wants in." "It's Pat." Jenny said. Her voice was flat but I heard fear under the calm. Lee nodded. "It's Pat Peterson, your Ex." Lee looked at me with strong focus. I looked at Jenny, Mike and Carol. I said, "I'm not a man you can ask a relationship question to. We are a family. Even if I or we say we don't want to be around her, this is your family, your rules." "I want your input." Mike said, "Call Rina. I want to talk to her. I also want to know what she did while she was here." Jenny and Carol nodded. Lee whistled. Ten seconds passed and Rina came into the kitchen. She was dressed in sweatshirt and shorts. She perched on a bar stool near Mike and said, "Ask anything. Until yesterday I didn't know she was your Ex." I asked, "How did you meet?" "She got a job at the hospital where I volunteer. She was struggling to keep the job. She's a receptionist and was having trouble being friendly. She acted scared of everyone. You know I can't easily resist lost souls, so I cultivated her. It took me weeks to get her to have lunch with me. It took five months to get her here. Lee sat down with her and they talked for a long time." I asked, "And?" "She's doing better at work. On our way home she told me she was divorced and it was all her fault. She told me that she wanted to join Lee's family, but couldn't. She saw how loving and sexual many of us are and she said she would never have sex again." Jenny asked, "She said she was never having sex again?" "You want a quote? I'm never letting anyone inside me again. I fucked my life away looking for the perfect cock when I already had it at home." Then she cried. I took her home and she cried all night. Wouldn't even let me hold her." I looked from Rina to Lee and asked, "Lee, you know she wants in. If we lived in England, France or Japan would you hesitate?" "Yes. I'd call you and ask you to come here. I'd tell you then just what I'm going to tell you now. Until you forgive her and she forgives herself, none of you can fully love." Jenny was openly crying. Carol was holding her and Mike was holding them. I noticed I was crying too. "I need some time." I said. Megan said, "All of us are here for all of you. Stay or go, nothing about us has or will change. We love you." The four of us dressed and Mike drove us home. Nothing was said during the drive. As Mike stopped in our new garage he opened the door and said, "Lee's right and we all know it." He helped Carol out and I helped Jenny. I held her hand until we were in the house and then I fell into my recliner and pulled Jenny into my lap. The next time I was really present to being with people it was almost dark. Jenny was crying in my lap. Mike and Carol were on the couch curled up together. I said, "Lee's right. Sometimes when I'm loving either of you I feel the hurt and the anger for Pat. It keeps me from really, completely being with either of you." Mike said, "It gets between us as brothers sometimes too." Jenny lifted her head and said, looking into my eyes, "I really thought I could drive everything about her out of you. If I loved you hard enough, she'd be gone. It's been three years. She's still always with us. What I'm going to say sounds crazy in my head. I know it will sound even crazier when I say it out loud." She paused and said, "Invite her here. I'll make dinner for all of us. We forgive her, we spell out the rules of this family and we offer her in. It's the only way we can be free." Tears flowed from all of us. She was right. Lee was right. Mike was right. I felt myself resisting. Jenny crawled a little higher into my lap and said, "Kiss me completely." I gave her everything I had and knew I was holding something back. The kiss ended and Jenny got off my lap, found our phone and dialed. She said, "Rina, we want Pat's phone number, please." She thanked Rina, hung up, dialed the number Rina gave her and handed me the phone. "Pat?" I asked. "Pete?" I heard a sob. "You need to stop crying so you can listen. Can you do that?" "Yes, Pete . I thought I'd never hear your voice again." I hit the speaker button. "Pat, I put us on speaker. Mike, Carol, Jenny and I are here. Can you hear me Ok?" "Yes." Her voice was almost a whisper. "We want to have a conversation with you. I believe it needs to be face to face. Do you work tomorrow?" "No. I have the next two days off." "I'll give you an address. Please write it down and come here, now. Bring whatever you think you might need if you were to spend the night." I gave her the address and directions. We ended the call. Jenny took Carol by the hand and they put fresh linens on the beds. Mike and I watched them being busy and then walked around the block. He said, "I've hated her for longer than you know. I know we're looking at doing the right thing, but I don't know if I can forgive her." I wasn't sure either, but I knew what it would cost us if we couldn't. When One Door Closes... Ch. 02 We walked in silence until we were back at our front doors. Then I said, "It isn't enough to forgive her. We need to love her, for her sake and ours." "Sometimes you're a real bastard. I wanted forgiving to be enough." We walked inside shaking our heads. Carol and Jenny were just inside. Jenny said, "You went for a walk? You went for a walk? What if she arrived while you were casually strolling the neighborhood?" Her anxiety had the two of them standing just inside the door in a state of near panic. I took both of them in my arms and kissed them. I said, "You could have started without us." They both hit me. I saw that they had moved furniture. Two couches facing my recliner, sort of a circle. Lights were on, but not too bright. They went and sat down, leaving my recliner and the close end of a couch open. I stood thinking for two minutes and heard a rap on the door. As I opened the door I saw Pat. Thinner than last time I saw her, no make-up. jeans and a sweatshirt over athletic shoes. Her eyes were puffy. She carried a fist full of tissues. I motioned her inside and said, "I'm glad you came." She looked up into my eyes and said, "I'm scared to death. Are you going to tell me what a bitch-slut I was? You don't need to. I beat myself up about it every day. I apologize for not wearing make-up, I've been crying." "I seem to remember seeing you once or twice without make-up before." I put my hand on her back, closed the door behind us and guided her to the couch. She looked down, not at any of us. Carol was on the same couch with her. She handed Pat a box of tissues. She whispered, "Thanks", clutching the box like it would keep her alive. I began, "Pat, look at me. Years ago you behaved like a selfish, self-centered bitch. You threw away a good life. Agree?" She nodded. Her eyes blinked, but never left mine. I asked, "Has your life been good since you went to Boston?" "No. I cry myself to sleep most nights. I hate not being loved by you. I hate being alone. Worse, I hate missing you, knowing I probably will be for the rest of my life." She used two more tissues. "Pat, look around. This is our house. The four of us bought it and are building it so we can live here and love each other for the rest of our lives. Look." She looked. When her eyes came back to mine she said, "It's beautiful." "It can't be finished, without you. We realized that we each have carried around anger, hurt, hatred, fear and sorrow about what happened. Those will tear us apart, kill the love this house is being built to hold... unless you let us love you, forgive you and include you in our family." She looked at each of us in turn and asked, "You can forgive me?" Mike said, "I forgive you. I love you and will love you for the rest of our lives." Carol said, "Pete 's right. I forgive you and open my heart and body to you for the rest of our lives." Jenny said, "I watched how you treated the man I loved for six long years. I hated you. I've stopped. Hating you keeps me from fully loving Carol, Mike and Pete . As of this moment, I declare I love you. I want you to sit in the recliner with Pete , like you used to. I want him to love you in every way two people can love each other. Then, I want to express my love for you, physically. The five of us are family. We will all express our love and affection often and powerfully." I said, "You have all the power here, now. We've forgiven the past and relegated it to the past where it belongs. We will probably forget sometimes and let old anger invade our thinking. We aren't our old thinking. Neither are you, I pray. If you accept our love and forgiveness, take off your clothes and come to me." It was obvious Pat was shaking. She stood and lifted the sweatshirt up and off. Her plain white bra remained. Her hands went to the button at her waist. Carol stood and unhooked Pat's bra. When Pat leaned forward to remove her jeans the bra fell off and she stepped out of the shoes and jeans. She still had on white panties. Mike knelt beside her and lowered them. She stepped out of them and came to me. She said, "Need help?" And she smiled. The tears still flowed, but she smiled. Many hands helped and soon all of us were nude. Pat crawled into my lap and snuggled in. She looked into my eyes and said, "I love you. I will never stray again." "I love you, too. Now, tell them." She did. She told Jenny last. Jenny said, "Need help getting Pete hard or you wet?" "You'd help?" "You're now my sister. Of course I'd help." I was already hard. Pat said, "I think I remember how this works." She twisted around and slipped me up inside her pussy. I held her back and leaned her tit towards my mouth. Carol stood behind Pat and held her breasts in her hands. Mike knelt and slipped her other tit into his mouth. As Pat lifted and sank on my cock Jenny knelt behind her and reached around her hip to touch her slit and clit. As soon as we gave Pat her first orgasm I lifted her up and Mike picked her up higher. He turned and took my place in the chair. We resumed expressing love and forgiveness. When Mike came in her we lifted her again and Jenny helped her lie on the rug. Then she and Carol daisy-chained and all three came again. Mike and I spooned them and we quietly floated in the feelings we created. We all picked Pat up, carried her to a king-sized bed and put her in. Mike and Carol went to the other king-sized bed a few feet away while Jenny and I put Pat in the middle of a sandwich. Later, when Pat woke up, she opened her eyes and saw Carol walking towards her carrying a tray with five cups of coffee. Each of us took one and I said, "Thank you." Each of us said the prayer. After Pat said it she said, "I have a friend who took me to her friend's house. He taught me to think of "Thank You" as a prayer. I said, "We know. Lee's our friend too. So is Rina." "I couldn't join their family." "We know. By joining ours, you joined theirs. We all did." Mike said, "We've been in Lee's home. We know how he and his family express love, but we couldn't. The negative energy we carried around kept us isolated from all that love. You were there and felt it too. I don't feel isolated now." "I've loved Lee's energy and his acceptance from the day we met. I just couldn't let it in." Carol said as she handed me the phone. It was dialed and as she handed it to me she pushed "send." "Lee," He said after two rings. I said, "You were right. Right up until you said it none of us were willing to see the truth. Pat is here with us now and we love her. I think Pat should have a key chain too." "Her welcome home party is Friday night, if you all can be here. The dress code is casual, very casual. I need to go now. Rebecca is here and she's in crisis." Lee hung up. Carol returned the phone to it's cradle. Pat looked at us and when her eyes settled on Jenny she said, "I never thought any of you would forgive me. I don't deserve forgiveness." I said, "You don't always get what you deserve." Carol said, "When I was in high school I had lots of teachers. Most of them made me work hard trying to get an "A". The toughest teacher I had was Charlie Course my science teacher. I took every class he taught. On the first day he passed out report cards. Every one of them showed our names and the grade "A". He said, "Right now you earned the "A" by getting into this class and you have it. Keeping it, is up to you." It was quiet for a while, until Mike said, "Ok. I have a big pick-up that's empty. Let's go get you moved." Pat's eyes got wider. "Just like that? I'm moving in here with you?" Jenny nodded. Pat saw her do it. More tears flowed. I held up my hands and said, "I think we need to talk some more first. Pat needs to understand our family, better than she does." I held out my left hand, showing her my ring. Jenny showed her ring. Carol and Mike showed theirs. "These rings marry the four of us to each other. I am married to Jenny, heart, mind, soul and heart. I am married to Carol exactly the same. Mike and I are husbands. Jenny and Carol are wives." "And me?" Pat asked. "You have been forgiven and accepted. If you want in, really in, you must choose to love each of us fully and completely. You need to wear a ring, too. The intention we have to do everything we can to make our lives better every day must be your intention too. Mike works. Jenny and Carol work. I work. All our money goes together to make our lives better. You must do the same." "Gladly! Willingly! I can cook, clean, dance, sing, whatever's needed!" "Ok. Let's go get her stuff." I said. When we got to the garage Mike asked, "Will this truck be enough to carry all your stuff?" "I think so. I rent a furnished studio. What I have is mostly work clothes." She was right. We bagged all her hanging clothes and bagged each drawer's contents in individual smaller bags. Jenny packed her bathroom stuff. We stopped at a hardware store and got a bungi-net to hold all the bags from flying out of the truck. The storage space we built into our home had plenty of room for Pat's stuff. I overheard Pat and Jenny talking as they put things away. Jenny opened the bag of underwear and bras. She asked, "Did you wear things like this when you were married to Pete?" Pat said, "Never. I bought really good stuff. I dressed to look good. I wanted to be noticed, to look good!" "And?" "And I was so into attracting attention I fucked myself and even helped other people into the gutter." "Are you finished beating yourself up, now?" Jenny asked. Pat looked at her and said, "I'm so sorry." "If you say I'm sorry one more time I'm going to slap your ass! It's in the past! Let it live there! Every time you put on an ugly bra you are punishing my sister, my co-wife for something that is finished! Come with me." She headed for the kitchen. I watched. Carol was in the kitchen. Jenny said, "Sis, get dressed. We're going shopping. Pat can no longer wear ugly clothes. If she's married to the men we love she has to dress like she's their wife!" Carol put three bowls back in the fridge, threw on some clothes and met Pat and Jenny at the front doors. Jenny found me and said, "Your wife has been doing penitence for years. She reminds herself what a nasty slut she used to be by wearing nun's underwear! We're going shopping." I got three kisses and they left. Mike and I called the jeweler who made our rings and ordered another one. We made other changes to compensate for now having five adults living in the house. I called the store we got our two big beds from and ordered another one, a queen this time. We put tape on the floor marking where we mortal, fallible men thought the new bed should go. Mike bet me a hundred that the bed would not live there. I wouldn't take the bet. We went back to work refinishing some of the wooden beams and we talked. "You know, if we're really going to open up and love..." I said, then paused. "Then it's going to be more than the four... five of us." Mike said. "Our house will be like Lee's." "We'll need partition walls and doors on the bedrooms!" We stopped talking for a few minutes then Mike asked, "How're we going to feel when Lee takes Jenny, Carol or Pat to his bed?" "I've been thinking I really liked our little family and the exclusivity. My ego loves thinking that all the married guys I know have only one wife and we have two. Now three. But, if we really open to love, exclusivity disappears... doesn't it?" I asked. Mike didn't answer. He didn't need to. We worked quietly for a couple of hours. The front door opened and three happy women trooped in, each carrying bags from Victoria's Secret, Nordstroms, Westside Pavillion and Century City Mall. For three minutes they happily put things away and bubbled all over the house. One at a time they visited us and we got bubbly kisses. Less than a minute after Carol kissed Mike all the bubbling stopped. A few seconds after that all three stood near us. Carol said, "It rained in here while we were gone. I, for one, don't like the energy in here. Please come to the living room and talk to us, boys." She did say please, but it carried all the weight of when a police officer asks to see your license and registration. The cop says please too, but don't even think of saying, "No." We went. Pat said, "Did I do something wrong? Are you both upset with me?" I saw her eyes fill with tears. None leaked out. I shook my head. "No, Sweetheart, none of you did anything wrong or bad. We were thinking about implications. Mostly, our energy is reflecting the state of uncertainty we're in." "Implications? Of loving Pat?? Uncertainty?" Carol asked. Mike shook his head. Then he spoke, "No. For three years we've isolated us from the world. There are people who know I'm married, but only to Carol. There are other people who know Pete is married to Jenny and used to be married to someone else. We lived a protected, insulated life." I jumped in, "When we saw what the anger, hurt and insulation was costing we took steps to fix it. What we did was right." "But we didn't look big enough." Mike said, solemnly. Jenny said, "I see it! It isn't about opening up to loving Pat! That was relatively easy. It's about loving Rina, the nurses, the squids, Corine, Connie..." "Oh, my God!" Pat said. "That's why our energy shifted. We don't know how to be with the thought of any of you going to bed with Lee, Brian, Adam, a squid..." "Or you going to bed with any of the women in the family! This is too huge to think of!" Jenny said. We were all quiet for a long time. Carol broke the silence. "Wait! Just because we're family doesn't mean we fuck everyone. You think Brian has bedded every woman in the family? Or Adam?" "Probably not, but he probably could." I said. "Rina has probably bedded every man." Jenny said. Mike and I both shook our heads. "Not me." We both said. I volunteered to drive us all somewhere for dinner. We dressed nicely and made a fuss over Pat's new clothes. We drove to Ocean Avenue Seafood and they gave us a table out near the windows looking towards the Pacific Ocean. Not much was said until the meal was about half finished. Mike looked across the table into Carol's eyes and asked, "Carol, do you love me?" "Of course." "How do you know?" "Because I get to say so and I say so." "Is it about my agreement with you about where I'll put my penis?" "No! I like where you put it... wait! I get where you're going. This upset is misplaced. We've been saying we love the family at Lee's, but we limited the way we allow ourselves to say it. We've been holding back!" I asked, "Pat, If I step down hard here please know I'm not punishing you or angry, I just need to get clarity. When you and Alexander Richard fucked were you expressing your love for him and he for you?" Her face went pale. Her eyes looked at the floor for a few seconds and then she slowly looked up at me. "No. It had nothing to do with love. He never loved me or even wanted to love me." I nodded and said, "It may have been about the excitement of breaking the rules, cheating, sneaking, or anything else but all that fucking was not about love. All the sex that happens in the family is aimed at loving. When anyone grabs a squid the first time do they know them so well they are saying, "Marry me, live with me forever", no. They're saying "I love you because you can be loving, because you can be the essence of love and because when I express love to you love, the thing, the intangible thing love, gets bigger, more real." Mike said, "We were taught to have the reaction to Pat, to anyone's cheating that we had when Pat got caught. We got pissed and shut down a wonderful part of life inside our reaction to some non-loving fucking." I said, "Pat, I'm sorry. If I'd met and understood Lee before you started going to Boston and San Francisco we wouldn't have gotten divorced or if we did it wouldn't have hurt so many people." "Are you saying now you'd find out and not be pissed?" Pat asked. "No. But I'd be pissed for a different reason. I'm figuring out now that inside the family it's Ok to express love however the people expressing it want to, as long as they are saying I love you, I want to deepen our connection. Fucking Alexander just for the excitement I'd now see as a waste. I'd probably be sad. Why do a dick like Alexander when there are so many men who love you and would joyfully express it with you?" "Friday night we're invited to a welcome home party at Lee's. Are we going to express love with the people at the party?" Jenny asked. Mike said, "Please, don't answer now. Let's think about it. Hell, talk with Lee, Connie or someone else in the family. Then on Friday morning at breakfast we'll decide. Either we all go or we all don't. Do what your mind and heart tell you." I paid the bill and as we left our waitress asked, "Could I ask questions? Maybe I wasn't supposed to listen, but I did and... and I need to talk to someone, and soon." When we left she had my business card. As soon as we were inside our home Jenny and Carol were out of their clothes. Mike and I undressed, but not as quickly and I said, "Pat, about this time we usually shower together and clean off the grime of the day. So far the shower has easily held four. If you'd like, we can see how it does with five." She smiled and undressed. "Where do I put dirty clothes?" She asked. Carol showed her and led her to the shower. By the time Mike and I got there all three were wet and waiting for us. We got wet, grabbed a scrub-thing, poured soap gel on it and began washing women. Our system was simple. All of us had a thingy, we all soaped each other, never ourselves and we washed someone else's hair. Shaving was by choice. If time was a consideration, we shaved ourselves. When time wasn't a consideration, shaving could be an erotic or sensual gift. That night Carol shaved Mike's face and he shaved her from collar-bone south. Instead of spending the time in the shower, Jenny, Pat and I shaved ourselves and took over the blue king-sized bed. Mike and Carol took the green bed, ten feet away. When they arrived our daisy chain was doing well. I was being sucked by Pat while I ate Jenny who was feasting on Pat. After Pat and Jenny had their first orgasms we shifted and I was inside Jenny, munching Pat who was kissing and holding Jenny's breasts. The lights were on, the stereo playing and each of us looked over at Mike and Carol as they joined. After the screaming, moaning and clean-up Pat went to the stereo and changed the music. Slow love songs played softly and Pat turned almost all the lights off. She lit three candles and spooned with Jenny and I. She said, "Mike, I love you." Mike said, "Carol, I love you." Carol said, "Jenny, I love you." Until Pat said, "Good-Night, John Boy." Then our house was quiet, except for the sounds of a sleeping family. At six the alarm sounded. Five people were momentarily surprised. Then our quiet home burst into action. The shower turned on and people quickly got clean. Breakfast and coffee were made, clothes were put on and kisses shared all during the process. At seven the front door opened and five smiling people left for work. Pat was half-way to work when she realized she had the day off. As I parked my cell rang. I answered, "Pete ." Pat laughed and asked, "Do I need to check before I spend money?" "No. If what you're buying makes life better, for you, for us, and it's less than three thousand dollars, buy it. Why are you laughing?" "I got half-way to work and realized I don't work today." "Oh! So what will you do?" "First, buy a cell phone. Then, I think I'll go up to Lee's. I feel like my life's been in a blender. Maybe he can help me get my head on straight." When One Door Closes... Ch. 02 "Great ideas!" I told her where the four of us got our phones. Two hours later Pat sat on the couch in Lee's house talking with Connie and Lee. At a little after noon my phone rang. I answered, "Pete ." "Hi. I got a phone." She gave me the number. "Lee, Connie and I are talking. Have you had lunch?" "Nope. I'm starting to get hungry though. Why?" "I'd like to meet you for lunch and talk. If you want to." I heard in her voice the fear that my forgiveness might not be real, yet. "Pat, what color bra are you wearing?" "Blue. Why?" "Because you just let your brain question your status. Check your bra. If your breasts are held in classy lace in any color, if the bra cost more than twenty-five dollars, or Mike or I helped you put it on, your status is secure. We love you. You can also call any of us and we'll tell you. Where would you like to meet for lunch?" "Remember that place on the beach where the tables are on the sand?" "On the Beach." "I just said that." "No. That's the name of it, "On the Beach." Great place. Meet in an hour?" "Great. I have a date with Pete." There were volumes in those few words. I realized I was just as excited. I said, "I have a date with Pat." Then, I hung up. Fifty minutes later I parked at "On the Beach". I saw Pat's car. I found her sitting at a table as far from any other table as possible. Her smile lit her up when she saw me. When I got close she left her chair and gave me a full-body kiss. She was about to start a second kiss when I said, "Let's save the next kiss until we're home and naked. Ok?" "Promise?" I nodded. We sat. We ordered and Pat began to talk. "I'm so glad I talked with Lee! I was so confused. I asked him how it was so wrong for me to fuck Boston and now it was Ok for us to fuck the whole family. He explained it so I now understand. When I watched Rina and Buck out in the hot tub I watched them fucking. Only, they weren't fucking. They were loving each other. Connie asked if I had ever made you dinner as a way of saying I love you. I said yes. She said that meal was me expressing love in a physical way. Lee asked if you had ever taken my car and had it serviced and detailed. I understood! When you did that you were telling me you loved me!" "And?" "And Boston and San Francisco were not about love. Dick was using me but he didn't actually care for me! When you and Connie join on Friday night it won't lessen your love for me, or Carol or Jenny, it increases the loving all around us. I could be jealous if it was taking something from me, but it isn't." One of the owners of "On the Beach" also waits tables and is a member of the family. I saw her bringing our lunches. I stood and asked Pat if she really wouldn't be jealous of another woman. She said, "Go ahead. Love them all!" Ginger put our lunches on the table and before she could even talk I took her in my arms and kissed her. She gave as good as she got. When the kiss ended Ginger laughed, "Maybe we can start a trend, kisses as a part of the tips!" "I promise to kiss you every time we eat here. Ginger, meet Pat, my wife, your sister." She helped Pat stand and gave her a kiss just like the one we'd shared. It ended and Pat said, "I'm glad I didn't wear socks! That kiss would have blown them off." Ginger stopped by a few times while we ate and Pat and she became friends headed into sisterhood. Pat was excited to talk to Jenny, Carol and Mike. She asked what they might like for dinner. I gave her their numbers and recommended she call and ask. I needed to get back to work, so we kissed and I left her getting out her new cell phone to call Jenny. That evening Mike and I pulled into the garage within seconds of each other. There were five cars inside already. One each belonging to our wives and two others. I asked, "Mike, you recognize those cars?" "Nope. Maybe Pat invited someone." "Maybe Jenny or Carol did. Did Pat call you about dinner?" Mike said, "I asked for Mexican food. You?" "She didn't ask me. She knows what I like." "Chantilly lace and a pretty face..." Mike's booming voice sang out. "And a pony tail hanging down..." I joined in. Together we went on as we walked to the front door, "A wiggle in a walk, a gigglin talk, Makes the world go round, round, round..." We were laughing as we opened the door and walked inside. The table was set, lights on bright and music playing throughout the house. I called out, "Hi Honey! We're home!" I expected one, two or three naked women to come to greet us. Four clothed women and a man came to greet us. The extra woman was the waitress from Ocean Avenue Seafood. We were introduced to them as Mark and Linda. Linda helped Pat serve dinner. They served enchiladas, tostadas with extra rice and black beans. Pat made stacked enchiladas instead of rolled. I loved them that way. She had, I remembered, experimented many times before discovering a way to make enchilada sauce that didn't have a slightly bitter aftertaste. With her sauce, good shredded cheese and fresh guacamole we were having a feast. Before a bite was taken I said, "Pat, I get the message. I love you too. Thank you." Mike said, "I love being told I am loved with great food! Thank you! I love you, too." Jenny said, "Thank you, for the loving that prepared our feast, for completing us as a family and for loving us. I love you." Carol's speech was nearly the same. We all looked at Mark and Linda and then Mike said, "You needn't say anything. There's a lot going on here and we're just acknowledging all that." Mark said, "I think I get it. When she made dinner for the family it's an act of love. She's telling each of you she loves you. It's almost like a prayer, without the amen at the end." We nodded. Linda said, "Thank you. I got here early enough that Pat explained "Thank you" to me. Thank you, is a prayer, a prayer of gratitude said to the person we say it to. I say it to Pat especially and to all of you." Bites were taken, appreciative noises made and more bites taken. When we were far enough into the meal Mike asked, "Linda, you wanted to talk. Shall we wait until there's no more food or can we begin now?" "A lot of my questions got answered by Pat while we cooked. However, Mark wasn't here so I'll ask questions to start, then maybe he'll ask some of his own." She took a breath and asked, "You all love each other like husbands and wives?" Mike answered, "Anything that a husband and a wife would do, we do. My job in our family is to do anything I can to make life work for the four of them." Jenny added, "The anything in that statement is huge. It means anything. Not long ago we started a project. Mike doesn't like doing plumbing but it needed being done. He did it. No complaining, he just did it. He was telling all of us he loves us. Pat made dinner tonight. She didn't make enchiladas. She made a physical expression of "I love you." I don't know if you can taste it, but I know I can taste the "I love you" in the food." Mark said, "Every time Linda looks at another guy I go crazy! What if she loves him more than she loves me?" I smiled. "Mark, someone lied to you. They lied to all of us. Let me see if I can 'splain it to you." I smiled. "Do you enjoy the enchiladas?" "Sure! They're wonderful!" "And the tostadas?" "They're wonderful too!" "You can't love both! You must choose, enchiladas or tostadas. Not only that but the one you don't pick you can never have again." "I'm glad that isn't the rule." "But, it is, just not about enchiladas. I loved Pat. I married her and told the world it was Pat and me, only me. Things happened and by the rules I needed to end the marriage or quit seeing myself as a man." As I took a breath Pat took over, "We got divorced and were both miserable. Jenny had loved Pete for years but stayed in the game of one man, one woman and stayed at a distance until I was out of the marriage. Pete took her into his heart and they married." "I wouldn't have admitted it at the time, but I still loved Pat. The rules said I had to choose. When Jenny included me in her love I told myself it was Ok, I could love her. I quickly realized I had loved her for years, but didn't allow myself to express my love." Carol said, "We had known Pete and Pat for years. By the rules we were already breaking the rules. Jenny and I are sisters and had been lovers since we were young. When Jenny and Pete got married we told him about us. It wasn't long before we became a relationship of two wives and two husbands. Then Mike met Lee and we discovered there were other people who have let go of the normal rules." Mike said, "In Lee's family loving is the norm. I know that Lee lives with women, not a woman. He's married legally to Connie, Megan lives with them and sleeps in his bed. Corine, Pam and Kat live at Point Mugu Naval Base and spend their off duty time at Lee's. There are forty or fifty other family members scattered all over California who all have keys to Lee's house. Most of them share physical affection, support and care with most of the other members of the clan." "No jealousy?" Mark asked. "It has happened. People have waded into the love and then gotten scared or been attacked by people invested in the normal rules and backed away. In most cases, once people understand the power and love of being in the family, they stay." I said. "So, You've known us for hours, not days, weeks or months and you could love us?" Mark asked. Jenny said, "If you want us to welcome you into the family all you have to do is say so. Talk about what being in the family means to you and your commitment to the family..." "I will do whatever I can to support any member of the family, physically, emotionally, sexually or however to have their life work. If you're moving, we'll help. Painting your house, we'll be there. Need a shoulder to cry on, someone to hold you while you cry or someone to listen to your pain, we'll be there. Need a brother to go to a movie with, a sister to walk on the beach, call." "What if I call Jenny and ask her to walk with me on the beach?" Mark asked. "Unless she has other commitments, she'll probably say yes and she'll walk on the beach with you. Are you asking if Mike and I will be jealous? The answer is no. We may get angry if you somehow break our agreements. We agree that everything is transparent. If you're walking and talking on the beach and the two of you decide that joining is appropriate, Jenny will call home and let us know. She may even bring you home and join with you here. Cheating won't happen." "How can that be Ok?" Mark asked. "Can you love both your mom and your sisters?" "I do!" "Is the fact that your Mom loves your Dad in the way of you loving them?" "No. It's different." "Remember the first women you loved?" Mike asked. "Yeah. Of course." He started to smile and stopped himself. "And, when the relationship changed did you stop loving her?" Mike leaned towards Mark when he asked. "She moved away. She went to Stanford." "So, you didn't stop loving her, you stopped seeing her." "Yeah, but that was years ago." I asked, "If your cell rang today and it was her, moving here and needing your help, would you be pulled to give her the help?" "Yes! But, Linda would probably be hurt and maybe worried." Mike asked, "Linda, Mark just got the call. She's coming back because she lost her job, got a divorce and needs Mark or at least thinks she needs Mark. He tells you about the call and about her. What's your reaction?" "We should help her. Let's go!" Mark asked, "You want to meet her to see how big a threat she is to us?" "Six months ago I would have been there." Linda said. "Not now. Now I want to quit having thoughts about people being a threat. If we love each other, we love each other. We should be able to co-exist and if you love her and love me we ought to be able to love together. In my thinking, if you can say you love her more than you love me, then you didn't love me. You liked hanging with me, liked waking up with me, liked sex with me, liked how I cook... but you didn't love me. When Pat went to Boston and fucked her way through town, it wasn't love. She didn't and doesn't love any one of the people she screwed. A woman from your past isn't a threat to us or me. If she moves back and wants you in her life, I may gain a sister, a co-wife or you will leave me for her. I will still love you. Our behavior will change, but I'll still love you." I said, "You may have a better hold on this thinking than I did yesterday morning. When we included Pat that was as wide as my thinking went. The five of us could love each other..." "Then Mike realized we were looking at things trying to still fit them into old thinking. How can I say I love you and then put a fence around the love? The only way is to love you in the old way. You and me against everyone else. Mike helped us realize that if we truly love the door, the gate, the barn is open. Yesterday we put a limitation on expression, so we wouldn't get damaged in the loving." Carol said. "The limitation is that we won't open to you completely until you have some idea what's being offered to you." Pat said. "Otherwise you think we're offering a free fuck." Mark should have had smoke coming out his ears. Finally he said, "How can you know you could love us? You just met us!" "Did you ever meet someone and just know they were bad news?" Pat asked. "Sure." "After less than an hour's conversation I have a pretty good feeling for who you are, what you're about and that loving you could be good for all of us. The old way included going out for coffee three times, dinner and a movie, going window shopping three times, meeting your mother and siblings and then the first kiss. I don't need all that. When you see what is being offered you will either run screaming to the hills or you will open up and love." I said. Jenny whispered, "Either way I will already love you and your choice won't change my decision." It was silent for a long time. Silent and we sat still. Mark stood up and stood in front of Linda. He helped her stand and held her hands. He said, "I love you. I have no list of reasons why I should love you. I love who I am when I'm around you. I want to love you the rest of my life... and I promise you I will." He kissed her. She gave it back with equal enthusiasm. Mark sidestepped and stood in front of Jenny. He helped her stand and then he said, "Jenny, I love you. I love you as a decision I made to love you, Pat, Carol, Linda and all my brothers too. You don't have to do or say anything for me to love you. If you ever want or need anything from me, it's already yours." He looked at Jenny and then at the rest of us. "This feels so freeing! I can just love you all." Jenny took his face in her hands and kissed him. A few seconds into the kiss Linda said, "God! Look at the love." She was right. The love was visable. When the kiss ended Mark found Linda in his arms and they kissed. Mike kissed Linda. When those kisses ended Jenny said, "I don't know about you, but I need to clean up." She took Linda's hand and they went off to the bathroom. Linda and Mark went home. We invited them back for dinner and maybe more for Sunday night. When they left they had all five of our phone numbers. Mike and Jenny were sitting together in the big recliner when Mike said, "I understand a little better why Lee invites people into his home and family. When new people come there is another conversation about what Love means. Every time the conversation happens the love grows. Each of us deepens our understanding of what we're doing and why. We're creating a new paradigm for living. It's not Lee's paradigm. It's not mine either and it is mine. I live Love like I see and feel it. Mark is living it, right where he is." "Each of us is." Jenny said. Carol and I didn't say anything. We heard them talking and we were busy. Carol was on her knees on the blue bed and I was standing beside the bed joined with her from behind. We were slowly moving in a dance that didn't need music. Later, in bed with the lights out, the alarm set for the morning and our bodies touching I said, "We're going Friday night. It's where this road leads." In the middle of the night Pat woke me up and we joined again. That very day she called Rina and they began looking for a better job for Pat. She also called Megan and Connie. When our family met at home on Friday afternoon Pat was bubbling. She sat us all down and said, "I have news! Rina, Connie, Megan and I have been looking for a new job for me. I have it! I start week after next working for a marketing firm in Marina del Rey." We congratulated her and asked all the good questions, about money, health plan, parking, travel and perks. I asked why she started looking for a new job. "I realized I wasn't doing penance any more. I got rid of the plain white bras and started acting like I was Ok. And Ok woman should have a good job. So... I got one!" We changed clothes and loaded into Mike's big truck for the ride up to Lee's. As Mike started driving Jenny said, "Drive carefully Mike, none of us have any underwear on." We laughed and Mike was careful. The party was going when we arrived. I asked Megan and she said it started Thursday. Two new squids were in residence. Art and Buck had shipped back to Afghanistan. We were all introduced to everyone present. As more people arrived more food arrived and we found delights from all over the world to tempt our mouths. Music played inside the house. A few couples danced. Others started dancing and moved to other forms of dancing than just vertical. I noticed that Pat was checking me every few minutes. Then I was aware that Jenny, Carol and Mike were checking me as well. It made sense. I saw Connie in the kitchen and wandered to her. I said, "I have a project that I need help with. Think you could help me?" She smiled at me and said, "You need three men and two women to take your family into your bedroom and join all of you." "I think the remnants of the old rules are hiding in the background of our brains and we need to shake them loose." I smiled. Connie opened a drawer and withdrew a small whistle. She blew it once. One short, loud blast. Then she put it away. Ten seconds later Lee, Meagan, Francine, Frank and John were in the kitchen. Connie said, "Find Pat, Jenny, Carol and Mike. Get them and Pete into the big bedroom at the end of the hall and have a joining. Make sure they all get loved and loved well." Megan hooked my arm and said, "I found this one. I'll take him back there." And, she did. In the room she asked, "I know what's up. Our conversation with Pat told us how terrified she is that this might blow up in her face and she'll lose you again. So, shall we wait until they're all here or just get started?" "What do you mean, just get started?" She stepped close and wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me. When the kiss ended she said, "We could stand here kissing and touching for a while. We could move our activities to a bed and see if your tab "A" fits as well as I think it will in my slot "B". Or, we can wait and draw lots to see who loves who." I stepped the one step to the door and opened it. I tossed a shoe on the floor and it landed so it held the door open. I resumed kissing Megan and moving us toward a bed. After we were on a bed and the activities were progressing nicely I felt other bodies join us on the bed. I heard other bodies making wet noises, kissing noises and both moans and groans. Meagan's hands were on my back when another hand guided my cock into Meagan's wetness. I looked to see who owned that hand and was met with a kiss from Pat. When I turned again, after that kiss, I was kissed by Jenny. When One Door Closes... Ch. 02 We were in the big bedroom for quite a while. Megan joined with me and with Mike before sharing herself with Pat and Jenny that I'm sure of. Mike joined with Francine and Megan and Carol. Lee joined with Carol, Jenny and Pat. When the activity level calmed we snuggled together and started getting used to the idea and the reality of being family. Pat was curled in Lee's arms and said, "Loving like this wasn't even possible in my mind. I was so into the other game I'm amazed at who I was. Thank you all for..." I held my hand up and stopped her. I said, "We all had a lot to learn. We're all still learning. I love each of you, completely." Lee said, "Outside this bedroom there's a party going on. All of them are family too. There's a pool, a hot tub..." "And Food!" Mike added. He got up and took Megan and Pat with him out the door and towards the kitchen. Pretty quickly the bedroom was empty and we had rejoined the party. Rina and Francine made a huge Shrimp Louie Salad that I shared with anyone who got close to me. It went well with a pizza that someone else had provided. Rina and Pat got together for some intimate time and by their report they became loving sisters and co-wives to the clan. Late that evening I wandered back to the bedroom and fell onto a bed. Less than a minute later I was joined in bed by two others and we snuggled together and slept. When I woke up later I found it was Jenny and Pat in bed with me. Mike, Carol and Rina were in the bed next to ours. At breakfast Kat, Pam and Corine joined the party and we spent time talking with the two new squids about their lives and what they were discovering. Both new squids were nurses, injured as they served aboard a ship in the Persian Gulf. Lee and I went shopping to get more supplies for the house. We talked and he asked good questions about the five of us. My opinion was that we had moved from isolationist feelings to embracing the whole family and that time would simply deepen the feelings. "One or more of the women in your home may have some withdrawal feelings in the next couple of weeks. She may feel like she's losing you. You'll need to make sure she feels wanted, needed and cared for." "You already know which one, don't you?" "Both Jenny and Pat. Pat's head understands the difference between the fucking around she was doing and life now, but her emotions are being pulled into feeling like it's just fucking. You, Mike and the rest of us need to make sure she feels emotionally connected to us, not used by us." I nodded, "And Jenny?" "She's shared life with Carol all her life. Adding Pat was tough. Last night she saw you with your cock in Megan and it was tough again. You did everything right. You loved Megan and you loved Jenny. You really took care of Jenny. Spooning her and holding her as you slept was perfection." "I don't doubt you, but how do you know?" "When you got up this morning Jenny and Carol talked. I listened. Jenny got the message that you loving anyone doesn't take away from you loving her. Carol processed with her and mentioned how loving you and Mike didn't take away from their loving each other, in fact it made it stronger." "That's good news." "Yes! Just be aware that all five of you are fragile for the next few weeks." "You may get a few phone calls for support." "Call me, Connie, Meagan, Pam, Kat or Corine. All of us are more than willing to coach and listen." "Ok." The rest of our shopping trip was about shopping. When we got back to Lee's home he rang the doorbell. It's the signal that whoever's at the door needs help. We got help and the supplies got in and put away quickly. I found Pat and kissed her, telling her I missed her while I was gone. She was in the living room talking with Susanne one of the new squids. I kissed Susanne and told her I hadn't missed her because I hadn't met her but I would miss her next time I had to leave. I found Jenny, Carol and Mike in the hot tub. I kissed Jenny and Carol. They both tasted of each other and of Mike. I told them I'd been thinking of them while Lee and I went shopping. Jenny climbed into my lap and spent some time being held and kissed. Pat came out of the house and joined us in the tub. She sat in Mike's lap and said, "This feels a little strange." "How strange?" Carol asked. "Like I'm not supposed to be sitting on Mike's lap. Like I am supposed to be in Mike's lap and... and like I'm unsure of the rules." Jenny said, "When I was fourteen I went to a party and we played a game. Someone set a timer for three minutes and we each kissed someone for the three minutes. When the timer went off we switched partners and kissed them for three minutes. The first couple of people felt strange when we kissed, then it stopped feeling strange. The last people we kissed felt natural to kiss. It even felt right to let them touch my breasts." "We're getting acclimated to a new normal. My head already understands that I love everyone here, but my emotions haven't expanded quite there yet. I saw Rina and Lee kissing a few minutes ago and my head told me I shouldn't be watching. I know in my head they don't care if I watch." I said. "Our old training still is telling us the rules." Carol said. "Maybe we should remind each other that we're in transition every so often for the next month or so." "Every so often, like every five minutes?" Jenny asked. I nodded. "We're pretty in tune with each other, I think. When I feel pulled by the old rules I'll speak the new way to one of you. It will help me and maybe help you too." It was quiet for a while, until Pat spoke. She didn't look specifically at any one of us... she just spoke what was there for her to say. "I still vividly recall what I felt when I was in Boston or San Francisco. I felt excitement, the excitement of knowing we were breaking the rules and getting away with it. Last night I walked into the bedroom and Nick was cock deep in Megan. I had a flash of remembering walking into a hotel room and seeing a man I had fucked fucking someone else. I realized last night that Nick wasn't fucking Meagan! I was almost overpowered seeing him loving her! Then... he turned and kissed me! It was tangible. The love he was sharing with Megan he was also sharing with me." She paused, went inside her own head and none of us interrupted her. "In the middle of the night I woke up and saw Nick, spooned with Jenny. I saw Mike holding Rina and being held, but not by me. My first thoughts were that you both love the one's you were with more than you love me. The old rules are so ingrained that they intrude in my thinking automatically. I need to be touched and told I am loved and I need to see and hear each of you telling and showing that you love others too. Otherwise I'll slip back into thinking this is all a fucking game and really, no one loves me. I'll go back to believing what I believed after I got caught, that none of the men I was fucking cared about me at all, I was just a cunt to masturbate into." I said, "Pat, I love you. Thank you for sharing what you just shared, A lot of the thinking that went on back then we've never talked about. I discovered your fucking adventures and made it mean terrible things, without ever finding out what it actually meant. The rules told me what to believe. I believed my dick was too small, that I was a lousy lover. Now I think the guy who wrote the script for "Cool Hand Luke" wrote the most powerful line even put in a movie: "What we have here is a failure to communicate." We were married, but we didn't communicate!" Carol said, "Mike and I were married and we didn't communicate either. I'm sure he had to make crap up about Jenny and I and about his abilities as my husband, knowing I was having sex with Jenny." Mike nodded his head and added, "I told myself often that the two of you had been lovers for so long that what you did was just a habit, not really love. I told myself that, but I didn't really believe it. I believed that one day you'd toss me out and have Jenny move into my side of the bed. I was grateful for every day I got to stay, knowing that one day, I'd be gone." Pat smiled and said, "It's true for everyone we've ever known. What we have here is a failure to communicate." "I want to communicate something." I said. Pat, Carol and Jenny all said, "Nick's hungry!" As we all laughed we all went to the kitchen. We ate, we danced, kissed, played in the water, talked with most everyone at Lee's home and expressed love. Saturday evening I slept with Jenny and Carol. I tucked Pat and Megan into bed with Mike and kissed both women Good-Night. In the middle of the night the four women traded beds. I woke up with Pat and Megan. I loved them both. After I came inside Pat, Megan did her best to suck and lick all our juices from Pat. Corine delivered coffee and breakfast snacks to the bedroom and shared some time with us. By noon we were dressed and headed home. I knew there would be many more lessons for each of us. I knew Linda and Mark were coming for dinner and they were lessons for us, learning experiences for us and we for them.