3 comments/ 36228 views/ 3 favorites My Life as Tommy 10 Inch By: Bakeboss Part l In which I get my nickname, go to prison and learn a trade, then get started in the porn business: My name is Tom Grant but most of my fans know me as 'Tommy 10 Inch', a nickname I've had since high school. It all started soon after I turned eighteen and I began taking showers after gym class. I had never considered myself 'well endowed' I just thought I was regular like everybody, but soon after I had been seen in the showers, the rumors began to spread. I have no idea who coined the term ' Tommy 10 Inch ', the first time I saw it was when someone wrote it on my locker. It's funny, I thought it was merely random graffiti but it didn't take long before everyone was calling me that. You would think I'd be proud of a nickname implying I had a big prick but I was a shy boy who had never even been to first base with a girl and all of this conjecture only made my shyness worse. The girl whom I considered my first love was so sweet, we met in church in fact, she sang in the choir. Our dates consisted of ice cream after church and walks in the park. After I gained my reputation a good girl such as she steered clear of me because of the risk of a ruined reputation. Instead, the 'easy' girls began coming on to me mostly to ease their curiosity and I was shocked as to the number of times I was openly grouped. As I solved their curiosity on my size, they proceeded to answer my questions on sex by show and tell. What I didn't know how to do in regards to sex they were eager to show me and I showed that I was a fast learner. Before long I was teaching rather than learning, as with most boys that age I was more of a 'wham bam thank you Mam' rather than a lover. Still it was during this time of my life that I learned that girls came too and if I could induce a climax during sex, it gave me a great sense of pride. Of course, the troublemaker boys followed the 'easy' girls and almost overnight, my whole group of friends had changed. It also was just about this time in my life that my mother passed away and with my dad working nights I was just about left on my own. What do they say, 'the only thing worse than bad friends is no friends at all', and so in order to fit in with my new friends I began to cause trouble. It didn't take long until I was arrested for stealing a car. Actually, I felt we were lucky that night, because we were caught just after stealing the car. You see we were heading to Jimmy the Rats house to pick him and his gun up to go rob a liquor store. If that arrest had come at the end of the evening, instead at the beginning, I might be still in jail. Truth be told, prison was where I picked up my acting chops for as you can imagine a young lad with a large prick made me desirable to both the pitchers and the catchers. It didn't take me long to reach the conclusion that fighting off their advances was going to only make prison that much worse if not fatal. Can you still call it rape if you let them do what they want whether you like it or not? I don't know but I soon learned, and I submitted to all in whatever way they wanted. As I became tolerant of what I was being put through, I began to act as if I liked what they did to me. Does that mean, I like sucking cocks, not really, did I like being fucked in the ass, not at all, but I did learn to accept these devilments. Soon I turned into the darling of the cell-block and I was chosen by the powerful for their pleasures. All of this led to alliances that I not only used in prison but throughout my career in the industry. I know many of you would say I was used and abused but I feel the road I chose was easier than the violence and menial labor experienced by the general prison population. One day I was informed I had a visitor, a man named Jason Nelson. This name was unknown to me at the time but I agreed to see him if only as a curiosity. He told me he had friends on the inside and they had mentioned my talents. He offered me a chance at a position with his company and that he would look me up when I got out. True to his word when I was released he was waiting for me at the front gate. This was important to me as my father had given up on me and there was nothing waiting for me on the outside. Of course, I don't have to tell you who Mr. Nelson is but at the time of my release, I had no idea. If for no other reason than the gratitude I felt for him picking me up, I thought I should listen to what he had to say. "Tom, let's cut right to the chase, I make pornos and I make a lot of them. From what my sources tell me you've got you self a giant cock, is that right?" "Well Mr. Nelson that's why they call me Tommy 10 Inch, but I don't know anything about acting in those movies." "Son, if you got the talent between your legs then I can teach you the rest." As they say 'and the rest was history', we formed a bond that lasted until Mr. Nelson was killed by that jealous husband, down in California. Part ll We meet my first co-star and go into my years as a fetish star: My first co-star was actually Marilyn Chambers and we were both unknowns at the time. What a trooper, she was so cooperative, whatever it took to get the shoot. She'd even stand in as a fluffer, doing all that extra work to get me hard and then just step right into her roll. To be honest when it came to acting with her, it didn't take much fluffing for me. She was just so god damn sexy I could get it up for her all day long. This woman liked her work because she liked sex, any kind, anyway, anybody and always with smile on her face. Marilyn always said, "Let's do some fucking today," I don't know about her other partners but it always relaxed me. I just don't know if I'd have had the career I have if she hadn't been my first. If I hadn't had her to compare with or if some of the bitches I worked with later had been my first, I don't think I would have lasted. I can't tell you how hard it is to look like you're having a good time with your dick in some woman, then you glance down, and she's yawning. You know fucking is fucking but if you can do it with someone you enjoy being with it just makes it all that much better. I think the reason she didn't get the recognition she deserved was that she made it all look easy. Marilyn's not with us anymore and I didn't even hear about it until I read it in the paper. I know it's my fault, but you know, once you stop working with someone you tend to lose contact and I hadn't talked to her in years. She was one of the pure naturals and in this business, there aren't many. I remember thinking, she was the best I ever worked with, and I never told her. Now she's gone and when I found out, I cried, out of regret for my callousness to a fine woman and a trooper in our industry. If by chance she goes to heaven, they had better allow fucking up there or she'll turn around and go the other way. I couldn't have had a better start in the industry as I was under the watchful eye of Mr. Nelson who was the best producer and working with such great future stars such as Marilyn. I was still amazed how much my career skyrocketed; of course, Mr. Nelson kept telling me that as long as I had the talent in my pants I couldn't go wrong. Does that make me a star just because I'm a freak of nature with a ten-inch cock? I feel that's like saying that Tony Curtis is a star because he has pale blue eyes. It is true your natural gifts might get you in the door but you have to produce to keep your face up on the screen and you name on the marquee. Mr. Nelson always insisted that I put quality product into my roll and never accepted anything less from me. I remember the wags saying I was crazy when I started the run of fetish films. They all said things, like a man with a talent like mine shouldn't stoop to do gimmick shtick. It was an easy decision for me, if Mr. Nelson thought it was a good idea then I'd go along with anything he said. Why shouldn't I he'd hadn't been wrong yet and as history proved, he wasn't wrong this time either. The problem with fetish is you tend to work with a lower class of actors. Many of these people are close to amateurs who only work with their particular quirk. I learned to put them in two classes of people, those in awe of working with the star, and those jealous of working with the star. Both are bad for the shot for one won't say when you're stepping on their lines and the other lies and say you are. You have to realize that most of these people are not going anywhere in our business and as fast as the newness of their fetish wears off they're gone and soon forgotten. I quickly learned there's a big audience for any kink you can come up with and believe me there is some kinky sex out there. There's so much fetish that I guess I'll never understand, such as midget sex, why do so many people want to see midgets having sex. It must be seeing a little person taking on a cock bigger than her arm, but I tell you its just weird. Let me just say right now, in all my years in the business I never worked with a co-star who could not fit my dick in their cunt, not even midgets. If you're a male with a large to huge penis don't let any woman tell you it won't fit, believe me it does. Another fetish I never understood was amputees, is it just a control issue or some deep-seated desire I'll never understand. I worked with one woman who was missing both one arm and one leg whose stage name was 'Eileen Long' (pretty corny huh) and although she was a real trooper it was difficult to do a scene with her, it was like making love to half of a woman. I will say this Eileen was a star and she had a big following, she got mail everyday from men wanting to date or even marry her. The thing that surprised me about her was that she was a 'lipstick lesbian' with a 'bull dyke' lover who always treated her like shit. I remember one film where my co-star was a man with the tiniest dick I'd ever seen; I swear the head of my cock was bigger than his whole dick. The opening scene had the actress comparing our hardware. She held my cock up to his and it was pretty funny to see the size difference up close like that. Next, he was on his back with his legs up and I was fucking him in the ass, while she sat on his face and belittled his tiny dick. I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing from all the shit she was giving him. The following act had me fucking her doggy as he sat in the corner like a good little cuckold and the whole time she telling him how big I am and I had put my cock where no cock had reached before. The funny thing it wasn't until we wrapped that I found out they were really husband and wife. Turned out it she wanted to humiliate her husband so much she even put his money in to the film to get it done. One of the first things I learned in this business is it takes all kinds. Just because it doesn't turn you on doesn't mean it can't make somebody else horny. I once did a schoolboy rape scene with an actor who was older than I was, yet on film, he didn't even look eighteen. We filmed in a school that had been closed down as we used the gym, which was dark and dreary. The shoot went smooth for me but I thought the "boy" as he was listed on the credits was enjoying what I was doing to him too much for it to show up as a rape. I have to be honest, I was shocked when I saw the dailies and I have to give credit to Mr. Nelson he was a sheer genius in the cutting room. When I was doing the kid, he kept moaning with pleasure but once Mr. Nelson was finished in edit, the kid was screaming for his life not his nut. I guess that's why I always wanted to stay on this side of the camera; I just couldn't understand that part of the business. I never kept count of my films so I have no idea how many fetish I made but I made them all, rape, incest, pedo, pee, scat (believe me after the scat movie I could never eat chocolate pudding again). The variety made for an interesting time of my career but it's what made this business just a job for me as I learned I didn't need to be sexually aroused to get up for my part as long as I could focus on something that turned me on . Part lll The golden years, I make a marquee film where I meet my wife and a history of our life together: I was nervous when Mr. Nelson offered me my first lead in a four reeler. He told me this was my chance to show case my true talent and when he showed me my name was in the title I knew I was committed. "Tommy 10 Inch Rides Again" was by far the biggest budget film I had been in up to that time. I promised myself that if it failed it wouldn't be because of my work and I threw myself into the job. I really believe my hard work paid off and laid the groundwork for the career I had. Of course, the best thing about making that film, it was on the set that I met my wife and one true love, Chesty. Chesty Wilson was already well known in the industry when she was cast as my co-star and the powers that be wanted a 'name' to put on the marquee. I was in awe of her on day one but she put me at ease right away. She told me she was familiar with my work and had even seen some of my fetish films. By the time we were ready to shoot, she had me completely relaxed, and we did the first scene in single digit takes. At the end of the day, she offered to rehearse the next day's scenes over dinner at her place. It turned out to be the offer that changed my life. I knew Chesty was out of my league and to me it felt like the diva inviting the chorus to dine, it just wasn't done. I went out and got the most expensive bottle of wine I could fine because I couldn't let myself show up at her penthouse empty handed. I was shocked when she opened the door wearing an apron; she kissed me on the cheek, and then thanked me for the wine saying it was perfect for our meal. She told me she was still working on dinner and invited me into her kitchen where she asked me to open the vino. I couldn't believe what I was seeing, here was the biggest start I had worked with, and she was doing Suzy Homemaker. As I poured us both a glass of wine, I told her that she didn't need to go to all this trouble. She told me she loved cooking and the thrill of gathering ingredients and mixing in just the right amounts gave her as big a charge as sex or anything else. The meal was five star and I mean it, then later rather than rehearse our film together, we rehearsed our life together. This was the first recreational sex I'd had in a long time so we both just relaxed and enjoyed it. Even though we had been naked together all day and even though we had fucked maybe five times on the set we took our time and got to really know each other's bodies. That night she managed to put love back into my sex life and a little tenderness back into my heart. Everyone who has seen her on the screen knows that Glenda is a beautiful woman but that was the night I saw her inner beauty and that far surpasses bone structure and dimples that compose outer beauty. I have loved Glenda Jean (Chesty's real name) since that night and even though we're not together any more I still love her as much. As you know "Tommy 10 Inch Rides Again" was a big hit for me but I always thought, I rode Chesty's coat tails in that film. Mr. Nelson called it my break out hit, it wasn't until Chesty, and I got married that he realized I wasn't acting so much as showing my true love for her on the screen. It is truly amazing how we could fuck on the set all day, then go home, and fuck all night. I guess we treated it like apples and oranges where one was just work and the other was a showing of our love. Some would say I completely debased my future wife in this film and I could see where they would be coming from. However, Chesty disagreed saying she and I were merely acting and if people could not separate the film from real life it just proved how well we did our craft. She is one of the few women I know who can take a money shot in the face and still look classy with cum in her eye and dripping down her cheeks. We were married the following year and soon after, Chesty announced her retirement. I know many people blame me for this but this was her decision in fact I tried to talk her out of it. She told me she would be much happier staying home to take of her household and me. We tried for kids for a while but basically the doctors told us her womb was worn out from too much kinky sex. I guess that puts down that old joke about not being able to wear it out because you can. Who knows, maybe it was better we had no children; it just seems so hard to have normal kids when the parents are famous. Still I think Chesty would have made a great mother and I'd have tried to do my part. I do know one thing with those natural double Ds she carried around she would be good at nursing her babies. I know we were both asked all the time about what we thought about our spouse being fucked at worked all day long, and if that made us jealous. Although I have never considered myself a jealous man I just told these people that if you wife or husband had to fuck all day long for work you knew they wouldn't be looking for any on the side after that. Yet as much as we loved each other, our marriage didn't last. I couldn't tell what happened it just slowly fell apart. It may have been living in the spotlight or just maybe celebrity egos are stroked so much they don't have anything left to share with a loved one. Still like, I said before and I'll say again, I will always love Chesty Wilson. Part lV My party period, lots of drugs, lots of off camera sex and maybe even a plaster cast: It doesn't take a shrink to understand why I went off the deep end, so to speak, after our breakup. As for me, all I knew was that I was a star and I was single and I wanted to sample the wares of every available woman in Hollywood. I was now a hot commodity and to be seen on my arm was a boost to any young starlet seeking publicity. That plus the desire of so many women to try out Tommy's 10 inches kept me busy as many nights as I wanted. At the time, although I had two films in the can I had nothing new on my plate so I decided to enjoy my free time. If they only would have had reality TV back in those days for that is what I'd done to my life, I turned it into real life porno. The problem being there was nothing as far as sex in real life that I hadn't done already on film. To me the answer was to turn to drugs to add some variety to my sex life. Believe me when I say that I've done a lot of drugs over the years but never as much or as often as I was doing during this period of my life. If I was to say it didn't affect me I'd be lying and even thought I knew it then I didn't care, I guess I was just in a destructive mode. As with all things, recreational drug use is fine when used in moderation but like a kid in a candy store, I couldn't get enough and the more I had the more I wanted. I knew I could be heading for trouble but I didn't want to hear about it. If a friend came to me trying to help I got rid of the friend, soon leaving me only those hanging around for themselves. It got so bad I wouldn't do anything unless I got high first, it didn't matter, grass, coke, smack, E anything or even everything together just as long as I was buzzed. I remember one time these two girls picked me up, not just so they could brag they fucked Tommy 10 inch, they wanted to brag they could snort a line the size of my cock. As for me I was all for it, they took pictures and everything. After that, they sucked me off and when I came, they passed it back and forth like a snowball, hell they even passed it to me. It wasn't the first snowball I'd had or the last for that matter. We three did coke and fucked all weekend, I bet we did an ounce at least and I know all three of us had a good time. Two girls and a guy is always fun for the guy no matter what happens, even just watching the girls is fun for the guy. One thing about fucking when you're high on coke is you can go on forever and I know both those girls went home sore Monday morning. As for me, it was always the same on a Monday after a weekend long binge, I felt empty and unfulfilled and I always blamed it on coming down from all the junk I was putting in my body. Now looking back in hindsight it was obvious that I was living a meaningless life with instant gratification my only goal. My Life as Tommy 10 Inch I remember I was at a party around this time in my life and I bumped into a girl who was what they call a Plaster Caster. For those of you who don't know about this it is a person usually a woman who makes plaster castings of celebrity cocks. I don't recall what I was on but I was surly and here I have this girl begging me to let her cast my 10 inch. She kept telling me this would make her so happy that she would do anything for me if I let her have this one wish. I said, "I tell you what, if you can fit my boner up your ass I'll let you make you cast." Honest I never really thought she would agree but she didn't even hesitate, in fact, she jumped up, took my hand, and literally drug me into the bedroom. When she got us naked, she saw I really was as big as advertised and I thought she was going to back out. All she did was run to the kitchen naked to get some olive oil to lube her back door. I guess you can imagine I didn't do much anal with my size and all but, I was ready to do this girl. I have to give her credit she was not going to give up but I think just looking at my size kind of made her sphincter freeze up. I kept telling her to relax as I began my assault and I think she really tried but soon she was panting like a woman having a baby. Then the panting turned to screams as she kept pushing back against my cock trying to impale herself. I glanced up to notice we has gained an audience, it was somewhat funny as they began chanting 'Go, go, go," like at a sporting event. I'll say this, the girl was a trooper, and she got all of my 10 inches in her rectum. When I came, I think the girl swooned or something for she collapsed on the bed. After I pulled out, her rectum was nothing but a gaping maw looking red and sore. I'll bet this poor girl pooped blood for days after her big adventure. Someone snapped a picture and at the time I thought that I hoped she ended up with a copy to go with her plaster cast as a kind of yin and yang type of poetic justice. I sit here thinking about this girl, she was young; bright with the world as her oyster. Now today there's a good likelihood she's a mother, I wonder if she brags to her children about taking Tommy 10 Inch up her bum, probability not. I did let her use me for the mold but to this day, I've never seen any of the casts. Part V I team up with Brenda Bubble to form a production company and go back to making movies: One day I woke up and as I lie in bed wondering what I was going to do with my life I suddenly sat up as I had an epiphany like thought. With Mr. Nelson dead and Chesty no longer in my life I was floating rudderless, no direction except downstream. I realized the only person I had left to guide me was myself and there was no time like the present to get started. I won't even try to say I stopped taking drugs but just like that, I stopped abusing my body and I kept the drug use to just occasionally. I thought about getting a new manager but then rejected the idea for I knew I could never replace Mr. Nelson. That's all right I'll just manage myself, I knew I'd been around this business long enough to still have a few connections. There is one good thing about being a porn star, you might be staler than yesterday's newspaper, but if your name's still recognizable, the powers that be will still see you. So, that's where I was, out knocking on doors, trying to stir up interest and as I was just leaving the lobby of yet another producer, I glanced over and saw Mandy waiting there. Mandy's screen name was 'Brenda Bubble' and an apt name for, her butt was big and round, and when you saw it, you just wanted to pop that bubble with your prick. We had worked together on a few projects and I thought they'd all come out well. We chatted for a while and when I mentioned said producer told me he had nothing working in the near future, she said she didn't want to work for that prick anyway. She suggested we go have coffee and we left arm and arm. As we talked over coffee, we commiserated over how hard it was to find decent employment in our industry anymore. I told her since Mr. Nelson had died I hadn't been able to find a decent producer worth working with. She said something like you and I ought to produce, we know as much as the moron we just left back there. That was pretty much how '10 Inch Bubble' Production got its start. Luckily, we both had some capital so we were able to keep controls in house thus leaving decision making down to just her and I. I had no idea that Mandy was as talented behind the camera, both as director and editor. That was a good thing as I was severely lacking in those skills. I needed direction I couldn't conceive what the product would look like until I saw it on the screen. Our first effort was 'Tommy Does Tucson,' you know a takeoff of the famous 'Debbie Does' series, popular at the time. I know you can't call it a classic but it did well and I know we both were pleased with the way it turned out. We were both shocked at how many showed up for the first casting call. Turned out we weren't the only actors unhappy with the current production companies. We told everyone gathered that we felt that actors were our greatest assets and promised to treat them with respect with great rewards for great work. It was brutal for both Mandy and I working both sides of the camera. I'm sure it had a lot to do with our inexperience in production but it was a good thing that our first effort was a financial success or we might have both thrown in the towel. In front of the camera was almost rest time for both of us as this was something we were both comfortable with and with the shot already blocked out all we had to do was perform. It was such a pleasure working with Mandy, I swear all she had to do was wiggle that fantastic ass of hers and I'd have a hard on and be ready to fuck. I remember one take where we were doing anal and I got so wrapped up I forgot we were filming and I wasted a money shot deep in her ass. I don't know what I was thinking I was so carried away I thought we were just fucking. The action looked so good on film we left it in and just cut in a money shot later. We were Tommy 10 Inch and Brenda Bubble the perfect porno couple and we made sure people saw us arm and arm all over town. The truth was we were partners but we weren't a couple and I'd have to say it was my fault. I think Mandy might have wanted to take our relationship farther but I just couldn't. I guess after my marriage with Glenda failed I could no longer open my heart to anyone else, besides that, we were business partners, and adding love to that mix would only complicate matters. Although we still worked the love angle in public, playing to the trades as it were, I'm sure many people thought we were a 'couple' couple, but we never did get involved romantically. No matter what Brenda, was a real piece of ass, that girl could sure fuck and I've never seen any woman enjoy anal as much as she does. Even my big old dick would slide up her poop shoot like nothing and she truly was the only girl I enjoyed doing analy. Much like me Mandy was blessed with a natural 'talent' meaning that great ass of hers, yet she didn't just rest on her laurels but worked just that much harder. That's the real reason 10 Inch Bubble was such a success, because talent and hard work not only makes a star it also make for good productions. It was a big disappointment to both her fans and me her co-star when Brenda decided to give up acting and to stay behind the camera full time. Just because I understood the reasoning, behind her decision didn't make it any easier for me and maybe it's just me being selfish here as I enjoyed working with Mandy. We not only had great chemistry on the screen, it was also good on the set, and face it the sex was fantastic. You people on the outside probably think the life of a porn star is all sex and giggles but believe me it's not. You need to look like this is the best sex ever, even when it's the tenth time you fucked this cow today and she still can't get an orgasm face that looks real. With Mandy, it was never work and to be honest I think she enjoyed every take, I mean this woman likes to fuck. 10 Inch Bubble had become so big that It was too much to ask Mandy to do all that edit work after doing scenes all day long. Even after, we hired production assistants Mandy, always the perfectionist wanted to be looking over their shoulders. I know to many it came to look like Tommy 10 Inch was the star of 10 Inch Bubble Productions but in reality Brenda Bubble turned our little company into the force it is now in the porno world. Yes and when I got my devastating news it was Mandy who held both our company and me together. All I can say is thank god for Brenda Bubble. Part VI I catch HIV and learn to live the life of fighting a deadly infection plus we find 10 Inch Bubble's new Super Star: Being in the porn business is kind of like playing football, in so much as if you play long enough there is a good chance you'll be permanently injured and if you're making pronos long enough chances are you'll get Aids. There is no such thing as safe sex in the porno business, as we all know the scene isn't over until the climax or 'money shot' as it is called and you just can't have a 'money shot' if you're wearing a rubber. In the business we brag about testing, everyone is tested everything is safe and yet we in the business catch aids more than any other sector. The thing with testing is today you test and everything is fine, tonight you go out and have sex and tomorrow you come to work infected, yet you have a fresh clean bill of health. Of course, it not just aids, it's all the STDs, but HIV is the one in which our industry is mainly concerned. When I found out, I was infected with HIV I was stunned, it was during one of my regular tests and when it came back positive, I was sure it was just one of those false positives you hear talk of. I will say at least with testing I was diagnosed early before I infected too many people. I was so thankful that Mandy didn't catch it; I don't think I could ever forgive myself if I had given this terrible disease to her. I guess it turned out to be a good move for her when she quit working in front of the cameras. As it was, three of the people I worked with also tested positive and as far as who gave it to whom I guess we'll never find out. It really doesn't matter, who can say what good blame does, I mean no one infected us intentionally. Working in our industry today is similar to playing Russian roulette, how many times can you pull that trigger until you come to live ammunition. Yet we never talk about the 'elephant in the room' as if it might jinks you so you ignore it and hope it'll go away. It's just sheer stupidity to be in this industry and not have some sort of contiguity for HIV, yet we all do it every day. It just seems so strange that I caught it when things were going so well in my life. Business was booming and 10 Inch Bubble was riding the crest of the porno wave. I was making more money than I ever had in my career and I was working harder than I ever had before. Success makes hard work worth it and both Mandy and I loved it. I'd realized long ago that my career would be short lived but I hadn't thought about it ending this soon. None of us like to think of our mortality but let me tell you Aids changes all that. It's the ultimate wake up call; it's that slap in the face you can't disregard. Aids tell you that you're too late for long-term plans and that you had better get your short-term life in order. First, I made a will, which was easy, I left everything to Mandy; she had been my rock when I was cast adrift in a drug-crazed sea but most important she was so supportive with my illness. While I was at it, I made a living will stating when to pull the plug as I had no desire to be lying about with no hope and then to be kept alive artificially. As most of you already know, next I went public with my disease in the hope the added attention would help Aids awareness and further the cause of safe sex. Physically I felt fine as my doctor explained to me, I wasn't sick at least not yet. My test results indicated that I'd only been exposed to the HIV virus. No one seemed to know how long I would go on feeling OK; the only thing that he would say was that the medical field was making progress by mixing certain drugs into a cocktail to delay the onset of full-blown Aids. The next big decision was what to do with the rest of my life. Did I want to travel or enrich my life some other way such as reading or the arts? The shock to me was not when I realized that the only thing in my life was my work but when I realized that it was all that interested me. I told Mandy the only thing I wanted to do was keep my finger in the business some way or other. There was no way I'd put myself in front of the camera again but there had to be something I could do off camera. She had the idea of me working by her side, both as a way of learning and to offer suggestions as they came to me. Although I've never felt comfortable working behind the camera, the more I learned from Mandy the easier it became. As I slowly became able to frame a shot in my head, the rest came around also. I knew I'd never be a Jason Nelson but I like to think at I least became capable enough to produce a sellable product. As I learned enough to solo, it freed up Mandy so she wasn't stretched so thin. Within a short time, I felt as if I was carrying my weight again and it did a lot if not for my health at least for my self-esteem. The problem we were having was a severe shortage of name brands for our product. With both Mandy and I no longer acting we needed a new hook to draw in consumers for our product. We decided the best way for us was to create a new star rather than try to steal one from another company. We needed someone we could rush into the lime light and try for instant celebrity. To find our star at a cattle call for one of our productions was close to a miracle. Gina was a star waiting to be discovered and all it took was one look to know this. She was a fantasy porn star; she had long blonde hair and a sweet chaste face with a smile that made you think she belonged in Sunday school. She was intuitive of her talents and dressed the part well. The clothes she wore belied her body, adding to her innocent look yet when she was naked, you could tell her body was build for sex. Even I was amazed at the size of her breasts as they were bound to her chest by the bra she wore making her look more like a B cup that the double D she actually was. Her slim muscular body added to her aura of a young virginal lass who just happened to be cursed with a huge rack. The first piece of film we took was of her giving a blow-job and it showed her natural talents as a true star of porn. On her knees in front of the male lead, she held him in two hands and starting with an innocent kiss on the tip slowly engulfed him to his balls. The look in her eyes as she stared into his face the whole time silently implied an 'I hope I'm doing this right look,' that rare a purity is hard to catch on film. Mandy and I had watched her perform live and both thought she was impressive but when we watched the dailies was where we could see her talent. As we watch the scene Mandy whispered to me that the shot was making her wet and as an answer I put her hand on my erection. It was Mandy who came up with the name 'Paula Pure' for Gina and everyone loved it. Paula's look made plot lines so easy we had two months worth of shooting before she even started. Watching Paula Pure's virginal look turn to ecstasy as she surrenders to her urges is a remarkable sight. Her best scene is on her back with an almost Marilyn Monroe pout on her lips while she is being plowed by the male lead. The female moan is one of the hardest takes in the business as it is not only difficult to portray believable it rapidly becomes redundant in its constant reiteration. However, Paula low lisp of a moan starts out as more a sigh and then builds to a guttural scream as she 'climaxes' on camera. Paula is the next sure thing in our business and we feel lucky to have her under contract to 10 Inch Bubble. So how does this story end? I guess you'll have to 'stay turned' as they say as I'm still going and going strong. As of yet I do not have Aids and my doctors say as long as I stay on my medicine cocktails there is a good chance my HIV won't go into it. As for work, I'm keeping my cock in my pants and just doing mainly post-production work now. It's not as much fun as what I once did but hey, I'm still alive and I'm still working so I won't complain. Overall, I think I've come a long way for a shy boy from a small town that happened to have a 10 inch pecker in his pants.