3 comments/ 5739 views/ 2 favorites Lesser Gods Ch. 06-09 By: CatBrown I hope you are enjoying my little book. The plot continues to develop, as do the emotions in these chapters, but the fruition is still far away. ************ Six In the morning she found herself on top of her regular bedding, but under two other blankets, and dressed only in her underwear. She tried to remember being undressed, but couldn't. Her gown was hanging back on the wardrobe where she had first found it. Well, that was where it was going to stay because she was packing her own belongings and leaving this crazy place as soon as possible! She got out of bed, dressed without showering, and began to throw her things into the two suitcases she had come with. She was almost finished when a knock came at her door. She opened the door expecting Mrs. Cook, but Grey stood before her, eyes brilliant blue and totally mesmerizing. She couldn't speak, couldn't move. Visions flew through her head: her riding horseback with Grey; her sitting at the side of a beautiful creek with Grey; her dressed in white lace tiptoeing to kiss Grey as people clapped from nearby pews. She no longer doubted these were premonitions, she just couldn't figure out how this could possibly be her future with a man she despised and couldn't wait to get away from. At the same time, they caused her to feel so wonderful, she didn't know if she could tear herself away from them. He blinked and lifted his line of sight to above her head, releasing her from the hold his eyes exerted. She immediately turned and strode back to the bed where she folded the last of her clothes and zipped shut the suitcase. "When will my driver be here?" she asked without looking up. "You still want to leave?" he asked. "As soon as possible," she said, picking up both suitcases and starting for the door. He reached out to take one of the bags from her and his hand touched hers. She dropped instantly to her knees, overwhelmed by emotions she had never felt before. Love so deep it had no end. Joy - not happiness which is fleeting, but joy – so full nothing could stop it. And peace; deep, abiding peace. She gasped for air feeling like the room had become a vacuum. Grey dropped to his knees beside her, apologizing, but she couldn't make out his words. He stood and stepped away from her. She briefly regained the ability to breathe, but as the intense emotions receded, they left a gaping emptiness behind, stealing her breath away again. She began to weep bitterly. After a moment that felt like a century, she felt a gentle pressure on the top of her head, and the gaping hole began to fill, slowly, peace washing over her. She turned swiftly and reached out, wrapping both arms around Grey's legs, weeping and laughing simultaneously. He stroked her hair until she was able to breathe normally again. She felt foolish, confused, grateful, and strangely wanting. She backed up a bit and stood, looking down, afraid to meet his eyes. "I'm sorry. I should have been more careful. I never know how my touch might affect a newly emerging gift," he said gently. She saw his hand move toward her face and flinched away. "It's all right," he said, "I know now how to control the effects." He reached for her chin again and lifted her face to meet his. His touch had no affect this time, it was simply a touch. She closed her eyes, afraid of what she would see and feel if she looked into his eyes. "Tell yourself you will only see what is in front of you. Repeat it over a few times. Mean it," he paused, then continued, "now, open your eyes, please." She opened her eyes. He was there, just twelve inches away, but she saw no strange visions. She looked at him, just him, for a few moments. Those eyes were amazing! So blue, so deep, and rimmed in thick, dark lashes. His face was chiseled, jaw square, cheekbones high and slightly prominent. He was beautiful. "Are you all right?" he asked, concern obvious on his face. "Yeah," she whispered, then stronger, "yes, I mean. I'm not seeing or feeling anything that's not here." He removed his hand from her chin, and she felt the loss of it. "I guess that's good, but I rather liked the things you saw." She blushed and looked away as he smiled. He continued, "I know all of this has been hard on you. I didn't expect your abilities to progress so quickly, and I certainly didn't expect the content of those visions. I hope you will reconsider staying here. There really is so much that you need to know, so much you need to learn to control and use your gifts." Her feelings, which had been so clear this morning when she woke up, were a jumble of conflicting emotions now. She wanted to get as far from this man as she could, and at the same time, to be held by him and to feel that peace and love again. "I think I had better leave. I don't know how much of this I believe, but I know I'm so messed up right now that I don't think I can take in any more information," she turned away and paced to the window, just to put space between herself and Grey. "I don't want this to sound manipulative," he said cautiously, "but I do want to point out that you've been dreaming of being chased by a powerful being. I believe your powers will be considered useful to the other side, and that dream is a premonition." "If that's true, I'll be chased whether I stay or leave, so what's the difference," she asked logically. "If you stay, you will learn critical skills to prepare for confrontation with the enemy. You also will have the backing of the entire North American Legion, which is nothing to underestimate," he replied. She turned and looked at him again. A tiny wave of good feeling came over her. "Did you do that?" she asked. "No. I wasn't doing anything. Listen," he took a step toward her, saw her flinch away and stopped, "I promise not to manipulate you in any way. I can't help the empathy, I can't turn it off, but I won't plant thoughts or memories, and I won't amplify your visions unless you ask me to. I can't completely turn off seeing what you see, but I can limit it, and I can try not to react to what I see. Would that make it easier for you to stay?" he asked earnestly. "Perhaps. I need to think some more," she turned toward the window and looked out at the rolling hills and a tree line that seemed to follow a river or creek. "I will give it another day, and decide tomorrow whether I can stay here or not," she responded thoughtfully. "That's good," he said with a touch of excitement, "I can teach you some things and you can decide if they are helpful. And I can tell you about our kind, and explain some of the rules, and..." "No," she cut him off, "I want time to think, not to try to learn a bunch of stuff that will only confuse me more." He looked disappointed, but quickly regained his composure. "I really must tell you a few things, even if you decide to leave immediately." "How about at dinner? I will hopefully have cleared my head by then and you can tell me what you have to," she replied. "If that is how it must be," he acquiesced quietly. "Will you join me for breakfast?" "No," she said, seeing a flitting look of disappointment again, "I will have some coffee and take a bagel with me. I'm going to walk to that river there," she said pointing out the window, "I think best in nature." "As you wish. I will tell Mrs. Haskins to pack you a small basket," he said, turning toward the door. "Mrs. Who? Oh, do you mean Mrs. Cook, the woman who cleans and takes my laundry?" she asked, feeling silly as soon as it was out of her mouth. "Her name is Haskins. Why do you call her Cook?" he asked, turning back to her. "I didn't know their names," she said sheepishly, "so I named them Mrs. Cook and Mr. Butler, just so I wouldn't keep thinking of them as "servant"." He smiled. "Clever. They are Mr. and Mrs. Haskins, though, so now you can think of them by the correct names." He turned again to go. "Why don't they speak?" she asked quickly. Turning toward her again she felt the tingle of his eyes on her. "They prayed diligently to serve the angels in the war of souls. They were approached with the opportunity to do just that, but they would have to give up most contact with other humans, and whenever contact might occur briefly, they would be unable to speak. They accepted and have worked here ever since." "Seriously? They prayed for the opportunity to be household staff?" She asked incredulously. He smiled and she felt a thrill up her spine. "Not specifically, but we try not to put too many humans in harm's way, and this was an assignment that needed filling. They were offered a choice of several and they felt most suited to this one." "Oh. I guess if it was their choice..." she let the sentence drift off. Turning again and reaching for the door, he said, "I will see you at dinner. We will have a third by then, since I already sent for Enrique. He will be helpful answering any questions you may have from the perspective of a half human." "Enrique...oh, was he going to teach me to ride?" she asked, putting the pieces together as quickly as she could. "Yes. He grew up on a horse ranch, and usually works in the southwest. He will be here later this morning," Grey said, stepping into the hall and glancing at her for the briefest moment before closing the door. She would swear the look he gave her was of deepest sadness. Seven Journal of a lesser god She remains the day, to think and decide if she will stay. How I pray she decides to stay! She seems to be developing her gifts faster than any half human I have seen in over 3000 years. She will be in grave danger if she re-enters the human world, both from the humans who will feel her power, and from the enemy who will covet that power. I must make it clear to her the very real threat she is under if she leaves my protection. I must admit, though, that my desire for her to stay goes far beyond my concern for her safety. The images she saw when she first looked in my eyes were striking and quite attractive. I have been alone for so very long, and her visions are so...enticing. I had noticed her, as a woman, but hadn't put much thought into it until I felt what she felt, saw what she saw! Now I can think of little else. ****** Mrs. Haskins had a basket ready for her that felt heavier than coffee and a bagel would warrant, but it was the, "Here you are my dear," that made her jump, and the flashes of the woman before her- working in the garden, in the kitchen, sitting in a rocker holding hands with her husband, and finally crying over a casket- that went through her mind that caused her to shake her head and tell herself firmly to see only what was really there. Mrs. Haskins smiled shyly and apologized for her earlier silence. "I understand that you were unable to speak before. Is that hard? Do you regret coming here to work?" Zoe asked, curious to understand why this couple had chosen this life. Shaking her head she answered, "Oh no miss, we love it here. Mr. Grey is wonderful to work for, and we are helping, in our humble way, to keep good and evil balanced. There couldn't be any more important work than that. We don't have any special abilities, and aren't much for evangelizing, but we can care for the house and gardens of those who are good at those things. It's a way we can feel useful to God." "So there is a 'God' above these lesser gods, a higher power who cares about humans," Zoe asked, continuing to fill in the gaps. "You didn't know that? Oh, my dear, God loves you! He loves us all, and His legions work to care for us every minute of every day. Oh, we have so much to tell you," Mrs. Haskins went on, flustered and excited. "Maybe another time," Zoe responded, backing toward the door. She had always avoided the religious types, the ones only too happy to force their beliefs down your throat. She certainly didn't want to be trapped here listening to fairy tales. She laughed a little as she scooted out the door. Why not listen to fairy tales? She wouldn't have believed there were people like Grey in the world before yesterday. Even her own powers would have her heading to a shrink if they had manifested back home. Maybe all this fantasy was real after all. She laughed again, without humor. ****** The walk was soothing, and the small river was exactly what she needed as a background to her musings. She thought about all that had happened the past few days, what was real and what she just wasn't ready to accept yet. She thought about her visions of her own future, which inevitably made her think about Grey. What did she feel about him? It was almost impossible to sort out her true feelings from the rush of emotions she felt when her gift activated by his eyes or his touch. And what about his touch? She had definitely liked him taking her chin and moving her to face him. But that was right after the intense feelings from brushing his hand, and his calming touch to quell the emptiness. How could she possibly know what she felt about him when every interaction brought on so many intense feelings that had nothing to do with the present moment? She put aside those thoughts and tried to think about his offer to teach her. She had so many questions, but was this the right way to get answers? Of course, she didn't have any other obvious way to get answers. Her mother had died two years ago, and she had no other family. Her father? She tried to remember if Grey had said where her father was now. Did he talk about her father in the past tense, indicating he must be dead as well? She couldn't remember. She tried to clear her mind by listening to the water burble and swish over some rocks nearby. Suddenly she was seeing her visions again: sitting by a river like this with Grey; marrying him; being intimate. No! She stopped her thoughts with a command. She was never going to be able to think straight about Grey as long as the future, no, a future, kept intruding. She refused to believe the future was unchangeable, so what she saw was just one possible future. She mentally built a room and forced each of those visions into it, shutting the door behind them. Now, maybe, she could concentrate on the present. She continued to mull over the pros and cons of remaining here until her stomach told her it was lunch time. She considered eating more of the food Mrs. Haskins had packed, but decided a real lunch would help her think more clearly. When she entered the yard of the mansion she heard horses from inside the barn. She detoured to take a look. The first stall contained a paint. It was a beautiful horse, and it put its muzzle right into her neck when she came near to look at it. "Well hey there friendly," she said to it, scratching between its ears then patting the side of its neck. Horses were really huge up close, and her fear began to rise, but the horse nuzzled her again and she wished she had some kind of treat for it. "He's flirting in hopes you have an apple for him, aren't you Major?" a deep, slightly accented voice came from behind her. She jumped and turned to find a man of Hispanic descent standing just two feet behind her and reaching past her to give the horse a good natured tap on the muzzle. This must be Enrique. He was tall, well over 6 feet, and even more broad across the shoulders than Grey. His skin was a smooth coffee and cream color, his long hair jet black and pulled into a ponytail down his back. He had warm brown eyes lined with thick lashes, and full lips pulled back to show a gleaming white smile. Her heart was racing and as she blinked she saw herself riding with him, laughing and standing close to him, wrapping a wound, and kissing him. How many men was she going to see herself kissing in these visions? She really didn't make it a habit to date every man she met. In fact, she had only seriously dated three men ever, and seldom went out more than once with the handful of others she had dated, so there was very little kissing in her history. What was it with these angels anyway? Apparently Enrique was not a mind reader because he looked at her expectantly when she didn't say anything right away. Realizing being lost in visions when meeting new people was rude, she quickly said, "hello. You must be Enrique. I'm Zoe." And stuck out her hand. He shook hands with her and said, "I'm happy to meet you. You've already met Major here. Would you like to meet everyone else?" "Sure," she said, but still a little hesitant, being so close to these big, powerful creatures, she asked, "Is everyone as friendly as Major?" "Not quite. They are all excellent animals, but some are a little more stand-offish than Major here." He noticed the tension in her face and quickly said, "None bite. And none would throw you if you tried to mount them, they just aren't as outgoing as Major." Feeling some relief, she turned to the stall behind her where a jet black horse stood staring intelligently at her. This horse was even bigger than Major, and it's muscles stood out clearly under its shiny coat. "This is War Monger. He got a name change as a one-year-old because he wouldn't leave the other horses alone, always nipping at them or pushing them out of his way. He was hard to break, but now he's an incredible steed," Enrique continued. "He just shouldn't be ridden by an inexperienced rider. He needs a firm hand." Stepping farther into the barn, Zoe saw the most beautiful horse she had ever seen. A rich, chestnut brown with black main and tail and a white star on its forehead, this horse was about the size of the paint. What made this animal special were its eyes. The eyes were gentle and thoughtful, and Zoe felt immediately drawn to it. The horse seemed to feel the draw as well, and stepped to the stall door and put its head out toward Zoe who reached up and stroked it. "That's what I expected," Enrique said, nodding, "This is Naomi. She is a woman's horse. She lets men care for and ride her, but she really shines when she's ridden by a woman. I think the two of you have a connection." Naomi nuzzled against Zoe and Zoe reached around her head to stroke her jaw. Zoe closed her eyes and saw herself riding Naomi across a snowy field. The feeling of connection was amazing. She may not understand her visions of the men, but this premonition was clear, she and Naomi were meant to work together. "Would you like to start lessons today?" Enrique asked, reaching for the tack hanging beside the stall. "Yes," Zoe answered without even thinking, "but I need to get some lunch first. Have you eaten?" "No, but that sounds like a great idea. Let's head inside." During lunch, Zoe asked Enrique how well he knew Grey. "I've known him almost 50 years now," he responded. "Really! Fifty years, but you look about 25." Zoe said, confused. "Once you manifest your powers, at around 25, your aging slows way down, something like four or five centuries pass for every year older you look," Enrique answered matter-of-factly. "So how old is Grey?" she asked, trying to calculate in her head. "Old. At least three or four millennia. I never asked," he shrugged, unconcerned. "So what do you think of him?" she asked, trying to get a handle on who Grey really was. "He's great! One of the few who never went through a dark period. He really cares about all of us, and the humans of course. He makes sure everyone is well prepared for any assignment he gives them, and he never puts us in needless danger," Enrique expounded. "But don't you think he's too cautious sometimes? I mean, he could intervene to prevent a tragedy, but he doesn't." she asked, wanting to hear that Enrique secretly disagreed with Grey's approach. "No. If Grey thinks it's out of his hands, it's for a good reason. We can't interfere with free-will. All we can do is mitigate evil." Lesser Gods Ch. 06-09 "But shouldn't the forces of good stop human evil when it harms the innocent? I mean, that kind of free-will is bad. Shouldn't God, or whoever, stop that kind of evil?" she asked, still convinced she was right. "How much evil is too much?" Enrique asked, then explained, "Evil is evil, whether small, like a lie, or huge like murder. What is too much evil to allow, and who gets to make those calls?" She paused to think about that as she chewed her sandwich. "I guess you're right. It just doesn't seem right to know something horrible is going to happen and not stop it. How can you live with that?" she asked, truly wanting to understand. "It's hard. We cry for mankind often, and we do what we can to alleviate suffering, but you learn after a mistake or two that some kinds of interventions, no matter how well-meaning, backfire in unexpected ways," he answered cryptically. "Angels make mistakes? How can you mess up when you work for good?" she asked. Enrique laughed, "We make mistakes. We sin. We try hard most of the time, but we aren't perfect. Time and experience make us better at what we do, just like anyone else. Whenever we operate on our own agenda, instead of God's, we take the risk of making things worse. And then there are the angels that completely turn away from the light. We cry for them too." "Turn away? You mean go to the other side? Like demons?" she asked, incredulous. "Exactly like that. The forces of darkness can tempt even angels. A few come back, but most are lost forever," Enrique said sadly. "Is that what you meant by Grey not having a dark period? He didn't toy with that life, ever?" she asked. "Right again!" he laughed. He had a great laugh, she thought. It made her smile every time. She thought being around him would probably be a lot of fun. She continued, "Did you have a dark period?" "Hmmm. I hate to admit it, but I spent some time as a free agent, using my gifts for my own good, not the good of mankind." Curious, she asked, "What are your gifts?" "I'm really strong, like most of the regular army, and I heal pretty fast," he said, "oh, and I can communicate with animals." "Like Dr. Doolittle," she giggled. "Not exactly. I can think into them, telling them what I want them to do," he answered, smiling good-naturedly. "Do they talk back?" she continued. "Animals don't generally have a lot to say. Sometimes I can tell why they're scared, or if they have family to take care of, but they don't generally come and tell me Johnny's fallen in the well, or anything like that," his smile grew bigger. "Cute. How about the horses? You seemed to know what they were thinking," She pressed. "That's because they're predictable," he laughed, "Major felt curiosity and anticipation. War Monger felt disdain, and Naomi felt satisfaction. "Disdain? Ouch!" she said in mock pain. "Remember, he's pretty full of himself. He could sense you weren't feeling sure around them, so he didn't have respect," Enrique said with a shrug, "He's pretty snooty." "But Naomi felt satisfaction, huh? I felt connection," Zoe went on. "Yeah, that's probably a better word. Animals don't think in words," he continued his lesson, "they give me impressions, feelings, and I have to interpret them. Sometimes I miss the mark." Lunch finished soon after and they went back to the barn together. Enrique started by teaching Zoe the names and uses for the tack, then how to saddle and bridle Naomi. Then he had Zoe mount the horse and try turning the horse's head side-to-side with the reins. Naomi was very obliging and Zoe was ready to take off for a real ride. "I'm not sure you should leave the yard yet," Enrique said, still holding one side of the bridle. "Can I at least ride around the yard a little," Zoe asked, really wanting to take off for the river again. "Yeah. Start out walking," he said cautiously. "Be sure you can get her to stop immediately when you say 'whoa' and pull back just a little on the reins. Don't yank them! Turn her right and left. Stop and start a few times." All right, mother," Zoe answered sarcastically. She gave a little shake of the reins and said "go", but Naomi just stood there. "What am I doing wrong?" she asked, confused. Trying to hide his smile, Enrique said, "Give a little twitch of your legs, just to bump her sides and the 'go' noise is..." and he made a noise out of the side of his mouth. She tried this and Naomi started to walk. Zoe took her around the yard in both directions. Enrique called out, "give the leg twitch again and see if you can take her up to a trot." She did that and when the horse took off, her automatic reaction was to pull the reins back and say' "whoa," which of course made Naomi stop, almost pitching Zoe off over her head. Enrique came jogging over, laughing, and said, "you have to be prepared when the horse takes off. Put your weight on your legs, standing a bit, and grip the horse's sides with your knees. Try it again." She did as he said and the horse followed commands beautifully. Zoe wasn't sure she liked the feel of trotting, but she was too scared to try to go faster, so she practiced turns and stops at that speed for a while. "I think that's enough for one day," Enrique called out after 10 or 15 minutes of cantering, "you'll probably be sore tomorrow. Now it's time to learn how to take care of your horse so she can take care of you." He proceeded to show her how to unsaddle the horse and brush her down, check her hooves, and feed and water her. Zoe felt great. Naomi was a wonderful animal and she was really feeling exhilarated from the riding. As they walked back to the house, Zoe grabbed Enrique's hand and thanked him again for teaching her. Standing next to him, she stood on tiptoe to kiss his cheek, but he turned, and the kiss landed on his lips. "I like the way you say thank you," he said with a big grin that got bigger as her blush developed. "Thank me again any time." Not knowing what to say, Zoe just started walking, still holding Enrique's hand, and tugged him along. When she let go, he held on, so she wrapped her fingers back around his, and while it made her blush again, she liked the way it felt. As they entered the front hall, Enrique was talking about going out again in the morning. Grey's voice cut in, "so does that mean you'll be staying?" Zoe guiltily pulled her hand from Enrique's and looked at Grey, who was staring at her hand. She realized she was probably projecting guilt and confusion to a man who could feel those feelings as if they were his own. She felt foolish. She didn't have anything to feel guilty about. The relationship with Grey was all visions, not real. She straightened and looked him in the eye. Enrique answered, "You know I'm staying for a couple of weeks. You assigned me." "I was speaking to Zoe. She was unsure whether she would be staying here or not," he looked between the two of them, "But I guess she has another reason to stay now." He smiled a wan smile, "The riding, I mean." Oblivious to what had just taken place between Grey and Zoe, Enrique said, "I didn't think there was any question." Turning to Zoe, and taking her hand again, he said, "Of course you'll stay. You have a lot to learn, and there's no better teacher than Grey." Enrique looked so genuine. There was no guile in him. Zoe couldn't help but feel warmth just looking in his anxious eyes. "Yes, I'll stay." She answered Enrique, then looking up at Grey said, "Only for a short time." Grey nodded once, then turned to continue up the stairs. He called back, "dinner is at seven tonight. Perhaps you two should consider showers. You smell a little horsey." Enrique faked offense, "Horses smell just fine. It's humans that smell funny," then he took off up the stairs after Grey, pulling Zoe along. Where Grey turned right and went through the now open doorway to his rooms, Enrique turned left down the hallway Zoe's room was on. He stopped in front of the door across the hall from her door and said, "This is my room. You're right there, aren't you?" he asked pointing across the hall. "Yes. I'll see you at dinner," she said and turned to go into her room. Enrique gave her arm a sudden tug and spun her back into his arms where he gave her a firm kiss on the lips. Smiling devilishly, he said, "I just wanted to thank you for deciding to stay." Then quickly ducked into his room.   Eight What had she gotten herself into? Instead of things becoming clearer, they were just getting more confusing. Her innocent intention to thank Enrique had somehow started him thinking she wanted to be more than friends. And maybe she did. He was gorgeous after all, and funny, and good-natured, and...The list could go on and on and she had only just met him. But what about Grey? While she still wasn't sure about her feelings for him, she had had all of those visions, and they had felt so right. She felt warmth and acceptance looking into Enrique's eyes, an excellent starting place for a relationship, but certainly not of the caliber of what she felt looking into Grey's. What a mess! Zoe showered and started getting ready for dinner. She put on the nicest dress she had brought with her, a simple 'little black dress' and kitten heels. She left her hair down to curl softly across her shoulders. Satisfied with her looks, she headed down to the dining room, still unsure of what was going to happen. Grey and Enrique were talking, heads together when she entered and they both stood. Grey pulled out the chair at his right, across from Enrique, and seated her. He smiled pleasantly and didn't seem to be bothered by anything. You look lovely this evening," Grey said as he took his own seat. "Gorgeous!" Enrique added, smiling widely. Zoe blushed and thanked them both. Grey was dressed in a dark suit, perfectly tailored to him. Enrique wore dark jeans and a polo shirt that looked as if it was having difficulty containing all of his muscles. They both looked good to her. "What would you like to discuss over dinner, Zoe? We are here to answer your questions," Grey said, looking at her mildly. "Um, why don't you just continue with whatever you were talking about when I came in?" she answered. Enrique looked a little flustered and turned to look at Grey. "That was just some business, nothing to concern you yet," Grey explained. "Surely you have questions about us, about what you are becoming." "What am I becoming?" she asked. "I think you will be a powerful seer. You may have other powers as well, but that will be your main gift," Grey answered. "Yes, but am I a human, a god, an angel, or some other thing," she asked, stressing 'thing' so as to make it sound like something bad. "A lesser god, an angel, it really doesn't matter. Humans name us as it suits the culture they live in. We are members or the Legion of Light. We work to keep evil under control, and to help the humans," Grey answered again. The Haskins came in with a tureen of soup, a basket of rolls, and salads for each of them. When they had left, Zoe surprised Grey by asking, "Is my father still alive?" "No. He was released with a promise not to interact with humans in such a way as to put them in danger, and he disappeared. He was identified by a member of my legion as a casualty of a battle around the time you turned twelve," Grey began, 'We don't know why he was at that battle." Zoe felt like she should be sad that her father had died, but she didn't feel anything. Instead she asked, "You guys really do battle, like with guns and things?" "Sometimes. We try not to let it get to that, but on occasion, it happens," Grey sounded regretful. Changing the subject, Zoe asked, "What are some of these rules you've mentioned?" Grey looked to Enrique who responded, "The first rule, and the basis for all of the other rules, is don't do anything to harm humans. Mankind are God's children, and we are their caretakers. That means primarily not revealing your abilities to them, while using those abilities to help them. We also work to prevent the enemy from revealing the battle going on all around." "Why is revealing our powers, our status, bad?" she asked "Because humans tend to worship what they can see. We don't want to confuse them away from God. When miracles happen, we don't want credit, we want credit to go where it belongs," Enrique continued. "But it is you doing the miracle, why not get credit?" Zoe pressed. "Who benefits from that?" Grey asked, "If we each take credit for what we can do, and start accepting the worship of humans, then we compete with each other for dominance, and become like the capricious gods of the Greeks and Romans. That serves the darkness. We serve the light as humble servants, putting the good of people above our own self-interests." Zoe understood what he was saying, but thought it sounded self-righteous, not humble. Still, he was right about everyone becoming competitive if they accepted the accolades. She grinned a little remembering how petty and childish she had thought those ancient gods were when she learned about them in school. Now she understood where that came from. The Haskins entered again with dinner plates piled high with roast beef, potatoes, broccoli and carrots. Zoe was already full from the soup and salad and shook her head when Mr. Haskins started to set a plate in front of her. Enrique reached over for the plate, saying, "If she doesn't want it, I'll eat it. I'm starving." Grey smirked, "You're always starving." Enrique shrugged, "I can't help it if I have a fast metabolism." Zoe was quiet while the men ate, thinking about the things they had said. She considered her own gift, and its potential as a lucrative career. She could definitely see the allure of using one's gifts for one's own self-advancement, but couldn't see how that was the same as working for the darkness. She closed her eyes and looked for a future for herself, but nothing came. She tried harder, but still nothing. Had she shut the door too tightly on her gift? She looked up and found both men staring at her. "What? Why are you both looking at me like that?" "You were... glowing," Enrique said, a little awed. "Don't be silly. People don't glow," she said. "Grey, why were you staring at me?" "What he said," Grey answered, pointing at Enrique. "I've never seen someone do that, though I've heard of it. Were you attempting to see a future?" "Yeah, my own, but it isn't working. Did it get turned back off because I didn't seem to want it?" Zoe asked, a little worried she might not really be an angel after all, even though, if she'd been asked, she would have said she didn't want any of this. "You can't look into your own future," Grey started, but as Zoe began to interrupt, he continued, "you see other people's futures. So far you have seen mostly how you will interact with that person's future, but as you progress you will be able to see any aspect of a person's future. Try to see into mi...Enrique's future," he hesitated and thought better of having her look into his own future, because it seemed to distress her, even as it made him happy. Zoe turned and looked at Enrique and told herself to see his future. Images of him working with her on the horses came to her, then one of him kissing her began to play and she internally said 'stop' and the visions ended. She turned to tell Grey that she could see Enrique's future fine, but found Grey frowning at her. He must have seen that last image himself. She felt guilty again, but then got a little miffed. She couldn't help what she saw! And just because she had those other visions with him, that didn't make her his girl! She was free to date whomever she pleased! Enrique was looking at her expectantly. "What did you see?" he asked. "Us riding together," she answered. "That's all?" he asked with a wink. She cleared her throat and looked down to hide the blush she felt creeping up her cheeks. "Yeah. It seems to be working fine." Grey folded his napkin and placed it beside his plate and stood. He reached for Zoe's chair but she jumped up before he could touch it. His face was composed, but she knew he was still bothered by what was developing between her and Enrique. She hated this struggle going on in her over these two men, neither of whom she actually knew at all! This seeing the future, or the possible future, had some drawbacks. That made her think of a question. "So are my visions set in stone? I mean, can the things I see not happen?" She asked as they walked across the hall to the library. Taking a chair set at a right angle to the sofa, Grey answered, "Your visions are the most likely future. They can be changed, but at the time you have them, they are what is going to happen if no one intervenes." "Oh," she said. She was tempted to look into Grey's future again, but didn't want him to see her do it, so she resisted. Had Enrique coming changed what she saw between her and Grey? Again she felt that fear of losing something she didn't even know she wanted. "So that's how I'm useful to you? So you can see the future and make changes?" she asked. "Yes, in a nutshell," Grey answered, looking carefully away as Enrique reached for her hand. She wasn't sure how she felt about the hand holding, but she felt silly pulling away. She hesitated, then relaxed and let him hold her hand. It was just a hand, right? "How long will it be before I can see other things besides how I interact with someone's future?" She asked, wondering if it was going to be years before she was really of any use to anyone, besides for embarrassment purposes. "You are progressing quickly, Grey responded, "I expect if you work at it, in a matter of days you will start to see other parts of people's futures. Your ability to see the future of those not right in front of you, and to see farther out, will develop over a longer period." "How do I work on it? Now I just look at someone and I get images. I don't control which images I get." Enrique squeezed her hand and said, "Practice. You can practice on me all you like. I don't mind having you sit and look at me." He was smiling at her, looking eager. "I have called in numerous members of the legion to file through over the next several days so you can practice reading different people. Just remember not to show what you see on your face, and never to tell anyone everything you see. It is best for most people not to know too much, as I think you may have already discovered," Grey explained, and Zoe nodded. "Well then, unless you have any more questions for me right now, I will be returning to my work," he continued as he stood up. "Thank you," Zoe said as he headed to the door. She felt a strong need to speak to him about the visions, and Enrique, but didn't know how. After he closed the door she jumped up and said to Enrique, "Oh, I forgot something. I'll be right back," and ran out the door herself. Grey was just mounting the stairs when she called to him, rushing to meet him, "Grey, wait. I...I don't want to hurt your feelings, or anything. Are you ok with me...and Enrique..." "I'm fine," he said, smiling a little tightly at her. "I have no claim on you. You may do as you wish, within the rules we discussed earlier." "But...the visions I had...of us. I know you saw them. And you saw the one... with Enrique. I don't know what this all means." Zoe said, hesitantly. "Don't let the visions blind you to reality. These things will come to pass, or they won't, as you decide." He smiled more warmly. "Goodnight, Zoe." "Goodnight," she responded absent-mindedly. Grey continued up the stairs. As he neared the top Zoe looked intently at his back and tried to see if her visions with him had changed, but she saw nothing. Lesser Gods Ch. 06-09 Stopping, but not turning, Grey said, "You cannot read me unless I allow it." Zoe scuttled toward the library without looking back at Grey. She spent the rest of the evening in the library with Enrique. They talked about his transition, and his life as an angel, though he preferred to just call himself a soldier. He asked Zoe what she had seen when she read him, and she reiterated that she saw them riding together. He asked, "You didn't see this," and he leaned toward her and kissed her. It was a sweet, lingering kiss, and it made Zoe smile when he pulled back to look at her. "Well...maybe I saw a little of that," she admitted. "Only a little," he murmured as he leaned in for another. This kiss lingered and began to turn a little heated. Zoe pulled away and said, "I think I'd better go up to bed, it's getting late." "Alone," he said, a devilish glint in his eye. "Yes, alone. I thought you were in tight with God. Doesn't He frown on that kind of thing?" she retorted. "God prefers fidelity, for the protection of human hearts, but we live a very long time, and see things most humans never see. God doesn't demand much of anyone, but does hope for our happiness. We decide how to live with what we know," he said. "I'll walk you upstairs, if that's all right." "Sure," she answered, pulling on his hand to get him moving. At her door he pulled her close for another long kiss. Zoe reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, tiptoeing to meet his lips. She was a little breathless when they separated. "Maybe you'll dream about me," he said, still holding her close. "Maybe I will," she answered, tiptoeing one more time, intending to give him a quick peck before going into her room, but stopped when she heard Grey's voice. "If you have a moment, Enrique, I'd like to speak with you before you retire." Zoe knew she must be blushing as she quickly stepped back away from Enrique and bumped her head on her door frame. Enrique reached out and touched her head where she bumped it, bending her forward a bit and planting a kiss on the spot. "Careful! I like that head the shape it is already," he said, then turning to Grey, "I'll be there in a moment. The command center?" "Yes," said Grey as he walked back down the opposite hall. How she wished she could read him! Was he hurt? She knew she didn't owe him anything because of the visions, but she didn't want to hurt him if she could help it. What a strange situation she'd landed in! "Goodnight, Zoe. See you in the morning. We'll ride between visits from the legion members, okay?" Enrique asked. She nodded and he turned and loped off down the hall after Grey. It certainly was easier to be with someone who didn't read your mind, didn't know everything you were feeling, and whose touch didn't bring myriad emotions to the fore. But, as nice as his kisses were, they didn't stir her the way the images of kissing Grey did. Oh, what was she going to do?   Nine Journal of a lesser god An unexpected turn of events has me more distraught than I have any right to be. Zoe has taken to Enrique's charms! She has consented to stay, but only, I think, to be with him. It tears my heart out to see her in his arms! I love Enrique as a son, he is a good soldier and a wonderful person, but I had already come to think of Zoe as mine. Foolish! She has a right to love who she will, and I vow I won't do anything to separate them, but must it hurt like this? ***** The night passed without any nightmares. She awoke early, as usual, and got ready for a day of riding and caring for horses. It appeared no one else was up yet, except the Haskins who had set out cut fruit, a selection of cereals, milk and coffee on the sideboard. Zoe took a cup of coffee with heavy cream and sweetener and sat in one of the window seats, facing the rising sun. It was cool in the morning, so she could feel the sun's rays as it crested above the tree line. She closed her eyes, smiling into the sun. A thought ran through her mind, 'this is what God's love is like,' and she wondered where it came from. Maybe that was Him revealing Himself. Grey walked into the dining room and straight to the sideboard where he poured himself a cup of coffee. He turned and saw Zoe watching him from the window. "Good Morning," he said, startled just a little. "It is a good morning isn't it? Zoe responded with a dazzling smile. "You seem happy. Did something happen I'm not privy to? Grey asked, with a tentative grin. "Nothing special. Just the sun coming up and shining on my face. I've always been a morning person, and I think it's because I love to greet the sun when it comes over the horizon," Zoe explained. Grey walked to the window she was looking out and leaned into the bay a bit so he could see the sun coming up as well. They were both silent for a minute. The joy of a sunrise seemed to intensify with Grey so close to her. He put his free hand on her shoulder, squeezed it gently, and when she looked up at him, he was smiling down at her. She smiled back at him. She couldn't think of anything to say, so she turned back to the sun and Grey walked back to the sideboard. "I think you will bring a freshness to life around here that I really need." He poured more coffee, took some fruit, nodded at her and left the room. Zoe poured herself some cereal and added fruit, then sat at the table to eat. She was surprised when a tall, well-built, stranger walked in. "Hello," he said, "My name is Francis Weaver. I'm here for you to read." "Hello, Francis," Zoe responded. "Help yourself to anything on the sideboard." He poured some coffee and sat across from her. She started reading him. She saw only herself sitting across from him. She concentrated on seeing past herself. He laughed. "What's funny? Zoe asked. "Grey warned me you might glow, but he didn't tell me you scrunched up your eyes like that. It's pretty funny," he answered. "Thanks, I need that kind of encouragement," she said sarcastically. She concentrated on him again, but only saw him leaving by the front door. "This is pointless," she said in disgust, "I can't see anything past a few minutes from now, and nothing that I'm not going to witness myself. I'm not ready yet." Enrique walked in at that moment and said, "It takes practice. Did you really think the first time you tried to see beyond your own interaction with someone it was going to work?" "No, but I feel like I'm wasting everyone's time when I don't see anything," Zoe said in a huff. "Just keep trying. Maybe concentrate on a particular time in the future and see if that helps," Enrique encouraged. "Yeah, 'cause you know so much about being a seer," she replied irritably. "No, but I have plenty of practice at learning new skills, and the only way to do it is to keep trying," Enrique said gently. Abashed, Zoe answered, "I'm sorry. I never have handled frustration well. I don't like things to take time and patience. I never learned to play a musical instrument because I wouldn't practice." "You don't know how to play an instrument?" Enrique said in horror, "You can't be an angel if you can't play an instrument." "What?" Zoe asked, confused and concerned, "No one said anything about that before!" "Gotcha!" said Enrique with a big smile. Zoe jumped up and punched him hard in the upper arm, only to pull her hand back and cradle it in her other arm in pain. "What are you made of, solid rock?" "Are you ok?" he asked in concern, taking a hold of her wrist to inspect her hand. "Gotcha!" she said in delight. He gave her wrist a yank to pull her to him and planted a kiss on her lips. "I guess we're even then," he said, snaking his other arm around her. "I guess so," she smiled up to him. "And you're in a better mood," Enrique continued, as she continued to smile up at him. "Don't mind me over here," said Francis, with mock hurt, "I'm only here so she can practice on me, which isn't nearly as important as a morning make-out session." Zoe cleared her throat as she disengaged from Enrique's resistant arms. He faked a frown as she turned back to Francis. "I'm sorry. Let's try it again. How about you tell me where you are going after this, and I'll try to focus on that," Zoe suggested. Francis smiled mildly. "I'm going to DC, to congress actually, if that helps." Zoe sat down next to him, holding him in her mind's eye, she closed her physical eyes and imagined him leaving and travelling to the capital. She had seen congress as a child, but didn't really remember it, so she just held the general image of a large room with rows of seats in her head. Slowly her image gave way to a slightly different room, populated with men and women in suits, microphones at each small desk. Half the room was empty, and a man was at the main podium appearing angry, but she couldn't make out a word he was saying, it was all garbled. A few of the people on the main floor rose and walked out. Then the image faded. "What did you see," Francis asked. "How do you know I saw anything?" Zoe retorted. "Well, besides glowing, your face changed and you tilted your head like you were trying to hear something," he responded. She remembered Grey telling her not to show everything on her face. She would have to work on that, too. "Do you expect to attend a heated discussion in congress, one that could cause people to walk out?" she queried. "Yes," Francis answered with disbelief, or maybe awe, "I'm going so I can encourage someone not to walk out, but rather to stay and discuss the issue rationally. That's pretty amazing! What did you hear?" "I couldn't make out the words, I could only tell the speaker seemed angry and some of the audience seemed disgusted," Zoe answered, a little amazed at her success. "There! I knew it wouldn't take much for you to move to the next level," Enrique congratulated. Francis stood up, "I'll let Grey know of your success before I leave. Good luck, Zoe. I think you are going to be a great addition to our team." "Thank you, Francis, and good luck to you today," Zoe continued, "I didn't see you in the vision, so I don't know if you will be successful or not." "Probably because I will be invisible, your vision didn't show me there," he suggested. Smiling, Zoe said, "Yeah, maybe that's it." Francis left the room, nodding to Enrique as he went. "You ready to ride?" Enrique asked. "Sure," she answered. They worked for an hour or so before the next guinea pig came by. Zoe was surprised it was a woman, though when she thought about it, there was no reason for there not to be just as many women among the angels as there were men. This woman was strikingly beautiful: five foot ten or eleven, 150 pounds, muscular, yet shapely, long auburn hair, light green eyes, and full lips that pursed enticingly at Enrique, causing Zoe a flash of jealousy. "Hello," the stranger said with a French accent. "I am Genevieve. Grey sent me to have you read me." "Hi. I'm Zoe. Would you like to sit on the back porch while we do this?" "Whatever makes you happy, mon cher," she answered with her silky voice. Zoe felt like a stray dog beside this woman. Was every angel gorgeous? She remembered that Francis had been pleasant looking, but not exceptional, so it wasn't every one of them. Shoot, why did she have to be one of the unlucky plain ones? "Are you coming, Enrique cher?" Genevieve asked, again pursing those glossy lips. "No," was all he said and he turned back to the horses. Zoe smiled to herself as she set off for the porch, quite happy to have Enrique reject Genevieve's overtures. Genevieve sat in a wicker chair and turned to face Zoe as she sat on the little love seat. Zoe consciously smoothed her face, closed her eyes and thought about Genevieve. All she saw was those long legs, that pouty mouth. She opened her eyes to look Genevieve in the eye, again, then pushed at her mind's eye. She saw a brief flash of Genevieve talking to someone Zoe didn't recognize, but it was gone in an instant. She tried again, but couldn't seem to get any vision to come in clearly. "What do you plan to do later today?" Zoe asked, hoping that would work again. Genevieve answered, "I will visit with Grey for lunch, then I will return home." "Where is home?" Zoe asked. "Why, Quebec of course," She answered with a touch of scorn. "Yes, of course," Zoe replied, trying to stay pleasant, but liking this woman less and less all the time. She tried to think about Quebec, but she had no idea what that would be like, never having been there. All she saw were blurry images of Genevieve moving amongst a group of people, and what appeared to be Genevieve bending and kissing a man's hand. That was weird! Zoe continued to try to see Genevieve's future for about ten minutes when she decided to give up. Genevieve had sat there looking at her nails, checking her makeup, and then tapping her fingers on her leg the entire time, so she was quite happy to be released. "I will tell Grey that you failed," Genevieve said without rancor, and turned to head inside. Zoe wondered what effect Genevieve had on Grey, hoping it was similar to Enrique's, but quickly realizing she had no right to care what that effect might be. Returning to the barn, Zoe found Enrique brushing War Monger, and talking to him softly. She listened to the conversation and was embarrassed to find Enrique was telling War Monger to be nice to her, that he (Enrique) really likes her and doesn't want the horse getting any ideas about treating her poorly. She cleared her throat to announce her presence and Enrique smiled easily and left the horse's stall. "I was just having a little heart-to-heart with War Monger. He doesn't like being left out of the loop," he said, rolling his eyes at the end. "Never met such a touchy beast as that one." "He really cares about the affairs of humans," Zoe asked, curious. "Affairs, plans, moods, he wants to know it all, but affairs are best, don't you think," he said with a wink, and reached out for her. She let herself be pulled into his arms. "You are incorrigible!" "Oh, please, encourage me!" he responded, leaning in for a kiss. Zoe pulled away and Enrique stopped. "Is something wrong?" he asked, concerned. She hesitated, then answered, "not wrong, just not right. I think we should take this slower. I don't really know what life has in store for me right now, and I don't think I'm in a position to commit to anything. Does that make sense?" Enrique loosened his hold on her, but didn't let go completely. "Yes. I don't like it, but I understand. I respect your feelings, and will do as you ask. Just please ask," he said, winking again. "You are too cute!" Zoe said, and wanted to kiss him, but having just said she wanted to back off, decided to move away instead. He let her go, but followed her out of the barn. "How did it go with Genevieve?" "Not very well. I only saw some blurry visions that didn't really make sense. I guess I'm not progressing so fast after all," she said, sounding crestfallen. "Don't be so hard on yourself. It will get easier. It's probably just her thick skin that prevented you from seeing clearly," he responded, stressing 'thick skin' in a nasty way. "I take it you don't care for Genevieve much?" Zoe asked. "Not much, no. She is a flirt, and ...well, I don't trust her," Enrique said with more negative emotion than she had ever heard from him. His normal happy continence was replaced by a scowl. "Wow! She must be something to make you look like that," Zoe said. "She's something, all right. I just don't think it's an angel of light," he stated scornfully. "Does Grey trust her?" Enrique turned away and said, "You'll have to ask him that." Zoe thought that was a strange response, but let it go. Obviously there was more here than met the eye. Unfortunately, her third eye wasn't helping her to see it this time around. ***** The day continued similarly, with Zoe and Enrique riding for a time after lunch, and two more team members coming by for her to read. The first visitor Zoe was able to read easily, but saw nothing of import. The second was harder to read, but once she got a line on him, she was able to warn him that a human he was working on, trying to keep on the straight and narrow, was going to experience a drug overdose when he got his hands on some strong heroine. The angel thanked her and immediately left the mansion to start working on keeping the young man away from his dealer. Zoe finally felt a sense of accomplishment that her gift might actually help someone. Enrique was true to his word, not trying to kiss her, or even embrace her, but he took every opportunity to touch her hand, arm, shoulder, and face that he could find. She smiled thinking about him, so open with his feelings, so free with his affection. She had always been a little repressed with her own emotions, a little aloof in her relationships, and she found Enrique's openness touching. If only she was sure that was what she wanted! She couldn't help pulling out those visions with Grey and examining them. Was that what she ought to pursue? She just didn't know, and if she was only going to see Grey at meals, would she ever get to know him enough to decide? 10/21 Where is she? I have everyone searching, yet no one has information. I need to see what makes her special, before he turns her.