0 comments/ 6346 views/ 2 favorites Every Way The Wind Blows By: EdgarJames34 I do not generally approve of editorializing. It seems like such a redundant and trivial exercise. I like to tell a story, to allow the characters to draw you into the tale. I love to hear that someone enjoys what I write. I even love to hear when I make a mistake, which can show me how I can improve my craft. I loathe the anonymous and pathetic fool who tries to belittle me personally for what spills from my imagination, as though my stories actually tell you anything at all about me. The core of this story is a tiny small piece of a commercial novel I have in the works, and I have just decided that some of it is a bit too graphic sexually for my intended audience. I really like it the sexual part, however, and did not just want to throw it away, so I decided to change it around a bit and see if it could stand on its own here. The year is 1961...it's all fiction... Whichever way the wind blows next... He escaped. He watched and listened as all of the arrangements were being made. He ate something when it was offered, he answered questions when asked. They probably were not aware that he escaped, because he had become so damned good at it over the years. Nova was the only one who might have suspected. She allowed him his space, but she stayed close, which made him stay close. The parade of close family came to decide how they would say good-bye to his father, and how the great man would be remembered, as though anything they could do with his dead body would have any impact at all on his legacy. Eva, presided, of course. Her approval was sought by them all, her sister Edith by her side as always. Nova would sing and speak. Richard asked if he could build the casket, from one of the Oaks near the family campground. What a wonderful and thoughtful gesture to honor the man. Bart asked to mill the lumber and make a special kiln run. EJ would be so proud of them. Leroy asked to be allowed to find and plant the tree at the cemetery, as had been the custom in the family for as many generations as anyone could remember. What a fitting honor. AJ could not allow himself to even think to object, even though he alone seemed to recall that a son, or a son of a son, or no worse than a son had always planted the tree before. Tidewater Falls did not have its own funeral parlor. The family, and the town in turn, were far more comfortable with the idea traveling more than sixty miles each way with a dead body than to allow anyone to open such an unpalatable establishment. And so it was that the Bingham's Funeral home in Corvallis had been providing the service to almost everyone in Tidewater Falls for more than five generations. Scott Bingham, the great, great grandson of the business founder, had delivered EJ Trask to the Gymnasium which bore his name. There was a town full of tears as Nova sang and spoke about her brother. Everyone else played their part. A line reaching for three blocks could not fit into the Gymnasium, but each and every one of them had the chance to walk by his open casket and say good-bye. AJ's only task was to acknowledge them all, shaking the hands and receiving hugs until only the pallbearers and funeral director remained. The coffin was closed and they carried him out to the hearse for the short ride to the cemetery on the hill above the Church of Christ. AJ looked carefully around the parking lot, and then smiled as he began the two mile walk to the Church of Christ. He truly had escaped. Almost. He saw Nova's Buick Electra pull up to the sidewalk in front of the Junior High School. The passenger window buzzed down, and she just waited. "Get in John Henry," she said into the rear view mirror as he approached her car. She was still gently patting her nose and cheeks with a compact as he pulled the door open and slid in. Finally she put the compact away in her purse and started the car, never looking over at him. "I need you back now, Honey," she said. "Huh?" he replied. She glanced again in the rear view mirror, this time checking for traffic, and then pulled slowly back out onto Main Street. She still did not look at him. "I know there's pain and hurt and tears out here in the real world right now...and I know it's safe where you go sometimes. God knows I would just as soon be there with you right now too...but we have to do what needs to be done...and I need you to help me to get through it." "I'm here Sis," he replied quietly. "Don't try to bullshit Aunt Sis." AJ turned and stared at her with wide eyes. Sis would not say 'shit' if she had a handful of it. She glanced at him and a forced smile puffed her cheeks. Emotions descended on him like a cold sneaker wave. The measure of his confidence receded on the skim as it smoothly glided and returned to the ocean. "There you go," she said, " that's better." "No it's not," he replied. "No...I'm sure it's not. You know that your mother will be sitting with the family up at the cemetery." He felt his face flush. "I gave her a hug as she came through the line...that's enough for me" "There will be a flag on EJ's coffin up on the hill...a bagpipe player and honor guard from the five eleventh. It's a really big deal for them...medal of honor stuff and all that...they'll fold the flag and give it to you...then you'll give it to her...and kiss her on the cheek." "Maybe you should let Roystoop do that too?" Nova allowed a long slow sigh as she eased to a stop at the four-way light. "Wow...I didn't see that coming." She put the car in park and turned to him with glassy eyes. "Is the tree really that important to you?" "New family tradition? Husband of a double cousin...or third cousin twice removed...whoever can kiss ass best?" He was sorry the instant he allowed the words to escape. "Jesus fucking Christ Honey," she whispered, her face wrinkled as she fumbled in her purse for a handkerchief. "What's this really about? I know it's not the damned tree? Do you want everyone to kiss your butt because you're forced to act like a man for the first time in your life? EJ Trask meant everything to this town. He means everything to this family...and that's not just people named Trask." He was embarrassed...and shocked. He could not look her in the eyes. Who was she? Nova would never talk like that; not to him, not to anyone. Who was he? What was he supposed to think? What was he going to say? This was exactly why he escaped. He closed his eyes and somehow summoned the long practiced image of EJ Trask's son. "I'm sorry Sis...God knows that I don't need to make this harder on you than it already is...you know I'll do whatever needs doing." It sounded like someone else's voice in his ears. She managed to gather herself quickly. A number of deliberate touches of makeup and she was again in control. "Thank You John Henry," she said as she pulled the car into drive and sped away from the light without bothering to look anywhere but straight ahead. It took several blocks before the shock of the conversation faded enough that AJ felt like himself again. "That's my whole family in that fancy maple box," he muttered. "That's not true," she answered quickly. "Well, maybe not for you Sis...I'm the last Trask...and that means I'm not really part of the family." "That's foolish." He let it go. She would not understand. Would anyone? The wail of 'Going Home' on the bagpipe reached out to every bend of the river down the valley. It was heart wrenching. Roy planted the Hemlock tree on the hillside. 'Amazing Grace' followed, wetting the eyes of every member of the family who had walked the long walk up to the cemetery on the hill above the Church of Christ. Some of them hid behind sunglasses. Family funerals were so often in the rain here, but this day was with but a few clouds in the warmth of summer. It would have been lovely. Smart uniforms...maroon berets...rifle fire that snapped and startled...snapping the flag out flat and folding it with solemn pride. AJ received the flag, then turned and handed it to Angela then found a place beside and behind Dan Hawkins. The Church of Christ preacher did not try to preach EJ into heaven. He closed with a prayer of thanks for remembering the favorite child. The family slowly receded away and down the hill to the church. AJ remained and watched as the Bingham crew removed the awning and lowered the casket. When they also lowered the vault into place, he removed his jacket, tie, and dress shirt, and carefully laid them across Oliver Trask's headstone. He trudged to the tool shed for a shovel then returned and silently began to fill the hole. He would have just as soon been left alone to do the job, but there was small chance of that. Soon Roy and two Bingham workers were silently laboring along side him. Within minutes the other Schtupp brothers also joined them, the rhythm and meter of a half dozen spades digging away sounded faintly like of a busy filing room. "Sounds like a room full of swedgers goin at it." Richard finally broke the silence. AJ could not help but smile that he had heard and thought the very same thing, but he said nothing. "I'm sure Eva's asking about you down there Ansel," Bart said eventually offered. "Yah...we don't want Nova and Martha to have to come stompin up here looking for you," Roy said. The brothers laughed together, but AJ never looked up. The laughter faded and the work continued until there was really nothing left to do. They formed a line as each returned his tool to the shed. AJ followed at a distance. Still without a look or a word, he picked up his clothes and marched down the trail to the church. The brothers just watched him as he walked away, muttering to themselves so quietly that he could not hear what they were saying. Not that he really cared. In the vestibule bathroom he washed his hands and face, then used his undershirt to wash his underarms and chest before putting his dress shirt back on. He still felt sweaty and uncomfortable as he replaced his tie and put his coat on, but he knew what was expected. He simply eased down along side the pews on the near side and then slipped through the double doors into the dining room as though he had been there all along. He quickly began thanking everyone he talked to for honoring his father by coming and telling each how good it was to see them. He received hugs and kisses from heavy old women, relatives and not, that he saw only at weddings and funerals. He shook the hands of dozens of men who had shaken his hand only an hour earlier, reminded each time of how his father would be missed. He kept moving, never allowing any conversation to land more than a dozen words on him, always on the edge of escaping and hiding. He danced a well practiced dance. Keep moving and be seen, much easier to do when the weather was nice because so many people were outside. He would mingle for as long as possible before he went near the courtyard garden, where Eva and Edith would be the center of attention, among the gardens and benches and so many of the attentive Church of Christ flock. The kitchen tables were overflowing with food; three filled of desserts alone. He knew from experience who brought what, and he made a point of thanking and bragging on each of the women as he spoke to them, even though he never touched a plate. Three times through the dining room and twice through the kitchen before Nova made squinting eye contact, but he was able to maintain a safe distance. He poured himself a cup of coffee and strolled outside, knowing it would be hard for her to follow because she and Martha would be on about the task of making sure everything about the serving line was perfect. He did not let the guilt nag him for long. A group of cousins all near his age were milling around behind the pump-house, and he sauntered that way to join them. John Boy Trask held out a brown paper bag that was pressed into the shape of a round squat bottle. AJ poured part of his coffee out and watched as his cousin filled it back up. "Sorry bout your Dad Cuz," he said, then took a sip from his paper cup. "Damned shame...he was a good ole boy." There was a chorus of agreement from the others who also raised their paper cups. AJ took a large drink of whiskey and coffee and shivered, then nodded to each of them in turn as they all nodded back in silence. There was really nothing else to say. "Thanks JB...I appreciate it...you guys be sure and get something to eat." Again the chorus agreed and AJ turned to take his leave. He understood. Just like with the brothers...it was easier for everyone to talk when he was not there. He sipped his coffee as he slowly strolled down toward the river, making an appearance at each of the picnic tables along the way. For many of the younger families it was more like a family reunion than a funeral, and that realization appealed to AJ. He was able to put a name to almost all of the children. He found a seat on the wooden plank walkway that reached out several feet into the river. The worn old rope with a treble knot in the end of it hung from the giant Alder tree that was the anchor for the makeshift dock. No children were swinging from the rope today, no screeching and laughing and running. No joy. He sipped his coffee and watched the shimmering image of Grass Mountain in the slow surface of the river. He could escape here for a while. He did not hear or notice his uncle Eathan behind him. "Eva is asking for you," Eathan said as he squatted on the wooden plank next to him. "She figures you'd get faster action than Sis or Mart?" His chuckled was a soft rasp. "I think she has no faith in me at all...after all these years...but Nova and Mart are both busy catering as usual...and..." "You weren't fast enough." "No...I wasn't...but how did get so quick? " "Learned from the best. Give and go...fake and drive...pick and roll...never stop moving." AJ finished his cold coffee Royal in a quick gulp and turned to his uncle. "Until they stick you in the ground." Eathan breathed in abruptly, almost a gasp, and shuddered. "Damn," he muttered. "Sorry Unc," AJ said after a long pause. "You just sound so much like him that...I don't know how I'm going to...damn." AJ glanced over his shoulder, but could not think of any more to say. Eathan sighed deeply, was silent a moment, then sighed deeply again. "Did your Dad ever talk about his will?" he asked. "Huh...No...No, he didn't. I guess I hadn't thought of that. I guess I figured that you would have that." "I see. So he didn't say anything about it...that night? " AJ felt lightheaded, whether from the alcohol or the conversation or both, he was not completely sure. "No. Just how important going to college was...watch out for Sis...help you at the mill however I can...stuff like that. Do you suppose he didn't have one?" "Damned unlikely...he was far too smart for that. So you never talked about the will...not even before?" "We talked one time about the buy-sell agreement...right of survivorship and how all of shares of the mill are owned...but that's not really the same thing, is it?" "Well. The buy-sell agreement details how the shares have been distributed, and who is entitled to buy what...and the life insurance policies are set up to fund those sales. That's just about the business, though. There are a whole lot of other assets involved that aren't part of the business, even though they are critical to the business." Now that made some sense. Trask Lumber had private timberland, but EJ Trask also owned thousands of acres of timber of his own. The company relied on that supply of old growth timber when they could not afford to buy Forest Service and Bureau of Land Management timber sales. The question of ownership and management of those resources could be critical to the company, and they could be worth millions. He had to admit that the fleeting thought of inheriting some of the timberland appealed to him, but not for reason many might expect. EJ had taught him to respect and cherish those old forests for all of the values they could provide, and a sustainable supply of the most valuable timber in the world was perhaps the most important one for a small mill town like Tidewater Falls. His father had made it clear to him that he would have to make his own way, however. AJ could expect a hand up, but not to expect a hand out. EJ had built the school and the gymnasium, and the library, and of course the small football stadium, but he had not mentioned any other projects. What else was there? "So who gets everything Unc?" Eathan sighed again. "That's what I want to know...that's why I need to see that will." "Do you think he would have left it all to my mother? " Eathan slowly stood back up. "I probably don't think that would be a very good thing if he did." He seemed to talking to the sky as he turned to stroll away, then glanced past his shoulder once more. "Eva was asking for you." AJ remained sitting on the plank, considering his uncle's words. Who had his father left the money to? His parents had divorced when he was a baby, and AJ had very little to do with his mother. They hardly ever saw each other, but he had long suspected that she still received a handsome allowance from him. What would she do with those forests? He sauntered up the slope from the river toward the church, folding a stick of Wrigley's in his mouth. He paused to set his coffee cup on one of the picnic tables, and went to Eva's side on one of the rot iron lounges of the patio. Marble tones with the names of his grandfather, great uncle, and great-grandparents surrounded them. There would be a stone for Emort Jonathon there soon, and someday also one for his son. "Thank you for sitting with me Ansel," Eva said reaching to pull his head over so she could kiss him on the forehead. "Of course," he said, "how are you holding up?" "A sad day...a mother should not outlive her children...and I have outlived two...but today my son is with his Lord and Master." AJ did not answer. It was not the time to answer. There would never be a time to answer what she was going to say at a time like this. But someone was going to say it, so he just decided to say it first. "All things work for good for those who love the Lord." He said it forcefully, and immediately worried that his voice and expression displayed the bitterness and resentfulness he was feeling. Had it sounded like he meant it? No good thing could come from embarrassing Eva at a moment like this as so many stood closely to witness. She sat up a little straighter, and turned in her seat. He tensed as she looked hard and long in his eyes, and then put a gloved hand on either side of his face. "Amen, Ansel Jon Henry," she said quietly. He felt himself relax inside. She reached up and pulled his head down so she could kiss him on the forehead again, then took his hand and straightened out her posture. They sat for many minutes like that, as members of the congregation walked by to pay respects before they left. This was why he was here, a grand show for her flock. The sun had nestled behind the hills to the West, with a cooling breeze sweeping up the valley, as the family members finally began to gather in the gravel parking lot. The Church wives had gathered the food and distributed to those who needed or wanted it. The brothers and their children would be having much of the remains for lunch for most of the next week. Nova and AJ were near the last to leave, delivering Eva and Edith home. AJ walked into his father's den and poured a tall glass of Cuddy Sark. He closed and locked the door. He sat in his father's chair, staring at the pictures on the wall. EJ in his Shriner's Fez at Mary's Peak Trek. Pictures taken with each of the crews from the mill. Every Way The Wind Blows On the flight line before the Philippines jump. Receiving the Medal of Honor. He felt it coming, as he had felt it so many times in the last five days. For the first time he did not stop it, did not even try to hold it back. AJ cried, and he did not stop for more than an hour. He heard Nova knock on the door, but he did not answer her. He just stared at the pictures as the tears fell. That was the night he started his journal to his dead father, and there were very few days after that when he did not add to it. Often his dreams after that pointed him to answers. Had he discovered some spiritual connection to dead man? He wanted to think so, but he slowly understood that the answers were never personal. It took time to understand that this gift was not for him at all. He spent a week with the road building company, then one week with each of the loggings sides, watching, asking questions, and writing reports to his uncle and in his journal to his father. By the end of June he was beginning to understand the company his father and uncle had built. They were hard working people, but change was not an easy thing for any of them. It was not in their nature. The week of Fourth of July was Beach Comber's days in Waldport, and the Tidewater Falls JC's held a timber carnival and horseshoes tournament. Trask Lumber shut down for the fourth, as it always had, and AJ spent the afternoon and evening on the bay crabbing with friends in a rented boat. They built a large bonfire on the sandy beach of the bay, cooked the crabs in a pot of boiling water, and drank beer until the fireworks started after dark. They talked about college, about the future, and nobody mentioned his father once. All of his college bound friends had received their letters of acceptance from the University through the high school because they were also receiving a Trask Foundation scholarship. His pre-acceptance letter had come just before his father's death, but he had not received anything since. He would need to remember to stop by the high school office to find out if his acceptance letter had been sent there as well. His father had started the Trask Foundation many years before for needy students, and he certainly felt like he was one of the needy students now. Nova was home fewer and fewer nights each week as the summer went on. There was always a note on the kitchen table with and a telephone number to call if he needed her, but he missed her. To begin with he was jealous and angry, and his disappointment found its way into his journal. It took a while before the answers in his dreams took form, and they left him embarrassed and disappointed in selfish emotions. She had stayed to help her brother, to help raise his son. She had put her life on hold for more than ten years, and now, with both of those loving acts of service complete, it was time for her to find herself again. And indeed evidently she was. Life around Nova's house began to change after that. He got better at keeping his own clothes washed. He got better at doing his own cooking. He stopped at Dandy's more often. He found plates of chocolate chip cookies and berry and apple pies on the kitchen table when he came home from work, though they were never good enough to be Nova's. He found girls swim suits that he did not recognize hanging in the pool house. As the summer days became longer and warmer he found Cindy Warden and a few other local girls showing up to clean the house and wash the windows, mow the grass, and of course use the pool. He learned that Nova had hired them to help keep the housework up for the summer, and he learned to enjoy the sight and sound and smell of more than one woman around him. More than occasionally he saw naked breasts and naked butts around the house and pool as the late summer months became warmer, but he managed to ignore them with good nature. Their conversations were fun and different than they had been in school. They flirted and teased. It was like being in a house full of sisters, like the family it would have been fun to be a part of. It was near the end of July, after a long Sunday afternoon of 'Nova's girls' around the pool, that his Aunt caught him completely by surprise. It was beyond dusk, and he was relaxing in a lawn chair after the work of skimming the pool, cleaning the filter, and adding chlorine was done. She appeared to the sound of her flapping sandals, wearing a long cotton shirt over her swimsuit, her golden hair pushed and rolled on top of her head. She handed him a beer and sat down beside him. "So the girls wanted me to ask you what's wrong with them. Don't you like them?" He took a slow sip of his beer. "Nothings wrong...I like em fine...they're a little noisy, but I don't have a problem with them being around...kind of fun." "But you're not interested in any of them?" "Interested? Interested in what?" "Naked bodies parading around in front of you? Interested in bouncing your bed across the room with any of them?" "What?" Nova sighed deeply. "Fucking...John Henry. You're not interested in fucking any of them?" He just stared at her for more than a minute, then took another long slow drink of beer and looked away. "No Sis...I'm not interested. Too many guys around here have ruined their lives by getting some girl knocked up...not this cowboy...not this rodeo. " "They're all on the pill. My treat. And they all use rubbers too." "What!? You're not serious." "I'm very serious John Henry...you like girls don't you?" "Yes Sis...I like girls." He started to get up. "They're just not my type, okay?" "Sit down Honey," she said quietly. "I'm not trying to embarrass you...but we need to talk...and there are some things you need to understand...about your father ...and maybe about yourself." She had his attention. He eased back into his chair. What did this have to do with his father? "Are you still a virgin?" she asked abruptly. He chuckled and took a long drink of his beer. "Not exactly." "What does that mean...exactly?" He sighed deeply. She was not going to make this easy. Could he tell her the truth? "I've had a few blow jobs...played with some tits. Never screwed Cindy, if that's what you're asking, even though I know she wanted to. There was really only one time that you would call sexual intercourse, but it wasn't with Cindy, and it was kind of different. Is that what you wanted to know?" She waited silently. Damn but she could be patient. He had never told anyone about this. He was not sure he could. "Do you remember Leslie Brown...couple of years ahead of me?" Nova took a drink of her drink and her smile was like a beacon as she nodded. "Yes...I remember Leslie...captain of the volleyball and softball teams her senior year. Tall and pretty...very...assertive girl." AJ chuckled again. "You could say that. My sophomore year...Honor Society took an overnight field trip up to Seaside for a Lewis and Clark exhibition. She said she wanted to talk to me alone. Made my roommate leave and then locked the door, and then she told me to strip." He took another sip of his beer as he recalled the experience. "I still don't know why I did everything she told me to. It was like I couldn't say no...like I didn't want to say no. It was a little frightening, but also... like I said...it was different." "Did she hurt you?" He looked away. He could not make himself answer her, but finally he nodded faintly. "She did, didn't she?" Again he nodded, still looking away. "And you liked it?" It was more of a statement than a question, and it burned into him. He looked down, then finally looked up met her gaze again. "I'm still not sure about that...she made me kiss and lick her...everywhere. I did everything she told me to...like I could not help myself. It was like a dream, the most magical and exhilarating thing I could imagine. She tied my hands with my belt, rolled two condoms on me, and then climbed on me and practically pounded me into the bed. When she was done she told me to come back if I ever wanted some more." He took a sip of his beer. "I still don't know if I was more afraid of her...or of me when I was with her." "You ever talk to your Dad about this?" "Are you kidding? I never talked to anyone about this. I can't believe I told you. It's like having leprosy in my mind that anything else would be a waste of time. It's like it's ruined me for anything normal. It's like nothing else gets me going...you know?" "Have you ever had that kind that kind a feeling or sensation around any other women?" He snorted a laugh. "No." "How about your mother?" "What are you talking about?" Nova did not answer. Her expression gave him nothing. She let the silence grow, and in that silence there was a moment of clarity, pieces of the very old puzzle of his family fitting together. The blood rushed from his face and he felt numb. It was all he could do to keep his mouth closed. "My father...and my mother...like that?" She shrugged faintly and her nod was almost imperceptible. "Well I'll be the God damned coat on great Oliver's ghost, " he muttered. Little fragments of that old puzzle that had never seemed to fit really did. He understood now the real reason his father made his mother to stay away. He did not trust her, just as he did not trust himself. Did he love her so much that he could not divorce her? The image of Leslie Brown had been with him since that day in Seaside, and every girl since paled by comparison. She was not beautiful. She did not have a great body. There was no one thing so very special about her and yet there was everything perfect and commanding about her. She simply had a presence that completely possessed him. "What was the matter with him?" He looked imploringly at Nova. "Is that what's wrong with me?" "It's okay honey." She took his hand and squeezed it hard. "There's nothing wrong with you. It's not as strange as you might think. It's not like you're mentally ill or anything. I think it's more like an addiction." She released his hand and patted his knee. "Like a drug addict...or an alcoholic? Can you inherit that kind of thing?" "I don't know that much about it, but I know someone who does. A friend of mine from Portland specializes in things like this. I'd like to invite her here next week-end. Maybe help you sort this out." "A doctor...you want me to see a shrink? I don't know?" "More of a therapist, actually, but I think she could answer a lot of questions and maybe offer some advice." Did he need help? Certainly seemed so. Did he have whatever his father had? Was there any other way to explain it? Did it show? Could others tell he was this way? Could girls like Leslie, or women like his mother, recognize this addiction? The notion that someone might be able to help seemed overwhelming at that moment. He had no desire to live with this kind of problem the way his father had. He did not want his life controlled and spoiled that way. "What would she do?" "She said she would help you understand yourself so you're more confident." "What about a cure? How can I fix this?" Nova remained silent, looking at the sky to the south as though there was an answer on the slopes of Grass Mountain. "I think maybe you were born with some of it, and the rest you learned. You love to help. You love to make things better. You love to serve others. You always have...even when you were little. I don't think there is anything wrong with you. You just have to understand that part of your nature better. That's what Barbara can do for you." He didn't like the answer. He did not like it all, but he thought perhaps he understood it. Maybe he had always understood it. AJ found himself running edger all of the next week because of a scheduled vacation. It was almost a relief to have the drudgery of a full time job for the week. He was anxious about Barbara's visit on Saturday, but it was more than that. He was beginning to wonder why he was trying to be an efficiency expert when nothing was ever going to come of it. Nova was right about him. He wanted to help. He wanted to make things better. It was infuriating to want so badly to serve others with his ideas and have no one interested in them. He still had his job, but he decided it was time to start concentrating on college in the fall. On Tuesday after work he stopped by the high school to talk to the Beverly Schtupp, the student councilor and director for the Trask Foundation. Tom Olsen, the head football coach, was the only one available in the office. He was still angry that one of his best athletes would graduate early and skip his senior season when he might have helped win another conference championship. Never mind that AJ's knees would have never allowed him to practice every day, let alone play. He handed AJ a scholarship application with a snarl, then ignored him while he filled it out and placed it on Bev's desk. It was Thursday after work before he had time to stop again. Beverly considered him with a faint look of distain as he pushed the double doors of the school office open. AJ did not remember her being exactly friendly with anyone. "What do you want?" she asked. "So nice to see you too, Bev," he said, trying a disarming smile. "I was wondering if any letters for me from the University for might have been delivered here." "I believe I might have a rejection letter here for you," she replied, digging in one of the drawers of her desk. AJ allowed a thin chuckle. "Of course they would reject the top honors student in his class." She plucked an envelope from out of the basket and quickly handed to him. "Not if he has failed to complete all necessary classes." He stared at her, trying to decide if she was serious or joking. She handed the official letter to him and pretended to busy herself with papers on her desk. He stuck a finger inside the flap and ripped the envelope open, pulled the form letter out and studied it. He could not believe it. She was correct - his application had been rejected. How had that happened? How was it possible? "What class did I fail to complete? I took every advanced math, science and English class offered here." "You did not complete Modern Problems." She still did not turn to look at him. "But that's not offered until senior year...I was told that it was just a formality to put that on my transcript." "Apparently you were misinformed." "Misinformed? Thomas Buckwold promised me...remember him...the Superintendent and Principal?" "Well...I'm sure he can straighten it all out. What a shame that he's in Hawaii...won't be back for two weeks." Her smile looked like she had just bitten into a lemon. Was she pleased with herself over what she had done to him? Was this on purpose? She knew it was a rejection letter before he opened it. How else would she have known that? Coach Olsen taught Modern Problems, and local gossip was that he and Bev were an item of sorts. Was this some attempt to get him to stay in high school, to get him on the football team? Would they stoop to that? Was that even possible? An ominous thought occurred to him. "I'm going to take a wild guess that the deadline for applications will pass before then...I can't get into the university this fall, can I?" "I would think not," she answered, still not looking at him. He felt all of the blood drain from his face. He let out a long sigh, and managed to barely maintain control of himself. "Why would you do this to me? What in the hell did I ever do to deserve this?" "I'm sure I don't know what you mean." "Do you think that a real school councilor would do this kind of thing to an honors student at the top of his class? What about the scholarship?" She could not help but glance at him. She was pleased with herself, but suddenly aware of how foolish and misguided her actions might appear to the board and other influential people in town. "As you know, the scholarship is also based on need. The final decision has been made. Nothing Mr. Buckwold can do to change that." He caught himself before his mouth fell open. He somehow managed to maintain control of his anger. What could have caused this pettiness? She was never a friendly woman, but what caused this? Was it possible that she did not know what his financial circumstances were now? "You know that my father left everything to my mother didn't you?" "I'm not accustomed to delving into such private matters." "Then how would you know whether I have a financial need or not?" "I'm really not at liberty to discuss such matters." "Which person named Trask are you at liberty to discuss it with?" "I'm very busy, " she replied," I'm afraid you'll have to leave." "How in heavens name did my father ever choose you to be Director of his foundation? What do you imagine Eva and Edith will think of this? What do you think the school board is going to say? Your not really foolish enough to think that you'll get to keep either of your jobs after this...are you?" This time fear and anger played across her eyes and around her mouth, but she did not reply. Had he always known what a pathetic and small minded woman she was? Worst of all she was family, sort of; cousin of his Uncle Tom. How could someone so close to family treat one of their own that way? That doubt made him laugh at himself. Family could be down right awful to family, especially his family, and especially is this little town. Hell, there was more loathing than love between the families. Those realizations left him with an odd distorted sense of humor. He felt tired and alone. Was it possible that he also felt sorry for her? He did not bother to say good-bye as he left. Nova was livid. She was ready to tear the heart out of her dead husband's cousin. She spent half an hour on the phone with her mother, then spent fifteen minutes on the phone with Aunt Edith. It was easy; they were on the same party-line. Of course now there were three other families that were probably aware of at least some of the details of the conversations. Soon the whole town knew that Nova wanted Bev gone from the school, off of the Foundation, and dead from blows to the head, all and in that order as soon as humanly possible. AJ's education plans were all the talk everywhere at TLC, and most other places in Tidewater Falls as well. Two distinct camps fostered their stories about him - he received condolences from almost half of the people he spoke to and angry glares from almost everyone named Schtupp. Bev Schtupp finally had her chance to get even with EJ Trask for her unrequited love. Coach and the town got some satisfaction for the state championship basketball team that might have been if he had played his senior year. By the week-end he would have been just as happy to leave town forever, if he had someplace else to go. Now he did not even have the promise of college in September. He woke up early on Saturday morning, having serious misgivings about Nova's friend Barbara coming to visit. His foul and depressed mood was lingering, and he dressed for a long hike along the perimeter of his property. Nova seemed to understand and let him go with only the promise of being back home for lunch time. He agreed, but with every secret intention of remaining gone all day and then building a fire on the sandy bank of the river at dark near his watchman's cabin. There were hotdogs and beer in the refrigerator, and it seemed a fine place and time to be alone with his thoughts. As he walked away that morning, Nova made him promise one more time to be back by noon to at least meet her friend. He argued with himself all morning as he walked the wooded fence line, clearing dead limbs from the barbwire strands. It was a perfect day, away from thoughts of everything except the beauty of the woods around him. He was so thankful his father had given him this land. As noon neared, he relented, as perhaps he had known or suspected all along he would. Nova had made him promise, and it was only fifteen minutes after the hour that he traipsed into the garage, stomping any traces of mud off his boots. There was a blue and pink Mercury coupe parked along side of Nova's car, and the dread began to swell up inside of him as he bounced up the back steps into the mudroom. He took off his boots, canvas pants and work shirt, slipping on shorts and sandals, before going into the kitchen. Every Way The Wind Blows He heard women's voices from the great room, and strolled slowly in that direction. They both sat on the leather sectional, legs crossed with hands gesturing to match laughter and conversation. They were both lovely women, but Barbara was an opposite to Nova's fare skin and hair. This woman had raven hair and light olive skin. She wore knee high glossy leather boots with tall thin spiked heels. Her skirt was black and tight and just over her knees. Her sweater was also dark, long sleeves and a collar draped low across her shoulders and neckline. Silver and turquoise earrings dangled and mimicked her subtle swaying movements. He stood and watched them for almost a full minute before Nova noticed him. "Hello John Henry...Barbara and I were just catching up." Both women rose as one and Nova gestured toward him. "Barb...this is my nephew, Ansel Jonathan Henry Trask. AJ...this is Barb." "It's very nice to meet you." He held out a hand as he strode forward. "A pleasure Love." She took his hand, rolling her wrist inward as she did until she was holding his hand in a firm grip with his palm up, then slowly she raised both of them toward his mouth. Her fingernails were long and perfect and painted a deep dark red. Her smile was captivating. Instinctively he nodded to kiss her hand gently, picturing himself as Errol Flynn. Her scent was alluring, making him slightly lightheaded. She released his hand and immediately reached to caress the side of his face with the back of her hand. He looked up into her dark blue eyes as she searched his face intently. "He is gorgeous, Noves...you were very right about that. So young and so perfect." Her hand traced along his jaw, then journeyed south until her fingernail flicked across his nipple. He winced, not from pain but from a powerful excitement that surged through him. Why didn't he put a T-shirt on? Mental images of Leslie withered and paled against the pallet of this wondrous creature. She was not gorgeous, but more than beautiful and overpowering. He had not dreamed whatever was happening could happen so fast. "I understand you have some questions." she said, the flat of her palm resting on his chest. He nodded, feeling like he was watching someone else. She patted his chest lightly and smiled. "And would you like for me to help you with that, Love?" A smile slowly stretched his face; a warm glow filled him inside. He was not sure he was brave enough. He did not think he could even make himself answer. "Yes," he heard someone with his voice reply quietly. "Then you go get my bags from the trunk of my car, and we'll get started." She plucked his left nipple again with her fingernails, nodding her head sideways in a subtle gesture of dismissal. He wanted to stand there and look at her forever, wanted to fall headfirst into her eyes, but he forced himself to turn and walk briskly across the great room toward the kitchen. "Put her bags in EJ's room honey, " Nova called out as he left. "I made it up for her." His mind cleared a little as he was finding the luggage. The inside of her car, including the trunk, looked like it had just come off the showroom floor. It seemed that everything about her was the picture of perfection. The women were laughing and talking as he carried the bags through the kitchen, but they went instantly quiet as entered the formal dining room and trudged through toward the hallway. "Thank You Love," Barbara said, her lilting voice caressing his mind again, "Go ahead and unpack my clothes and hang them up for me...find a drawer for my delicates...you can show me where later." "Anything else?" He paused before turning down the hall. He had tried to sound casual and off-hand, but came off as young and foolish. "Why yes...in the smallest suitcase you will find a large bottle of white lotion. Bring it and a hand towel here with you when you are finished." She gestured abruptly with her head for him to continue on. The master bedroom was huge, a double King sized bed along a wall, a large dresser and mirror. The reading chair, table and light were still in the corner, but all of the books were gone now. Every other hint of his father was gone. Nova and her girls had cleaned everything out, scrubbed until even any familiar smells were gone. This was the first time he had ventured there since before the funeral, an eerie vacant visage shook him from his mental revelry. He placed the suitcases on the bed opened them. The smell, her smell, erupted from the open bags and consumed him again in almost an instant. He was in a blissful daze as he carefully hung up her clothes in the walk-in closet - skirts and sweaters and dresses all dark earthy colors. Her panties, stockings, brazier, and garters were carefully placed in the top two near drawers just as they came from the suitcase. Three books and a leather bound journal were placed on the reading table. Two bikini swim suits were draped in the small bathroom along with all of the toiletries he found. He found the bottle of Channel lotion and set it aside, then surveyed the room to be sure everything was as perfect as he could imagine she would want. The room had a hint of her smell and he felt comfortable and confident and calm in the knowledge her place was ready for her. Where had that thought come from? He was only vacantly aware of himself walking as he went into his room and changed into jeans and a T-shirt. His mind was calm and still as he came back into the great room carrying the bottle of lotion. Both women were sitting again, and they turned as one to watch him. Nova's smile was radiant. Barbara's was soft and warm and expectant as he approached, but her eyes and mouth drew into a stern expression as she looked him up and down. He started to hand the bottle and towel to her when she held up a hand as if to stop him where he was. She turned to Nova, her hand remaining up. "Are you going to be okay Noves?" she asked, "We can visit, but he's going to be naked now...I understand if you want to leave." AJ was stunned beyond belief. He had no idea she expected that. He was not ready for anything of the sort. Every part of him was filled with electricity, forcing him to act. "I...uh...I don't..." Barbara instantly raised her hand higher and turned to frown at him with a shake of her head. Her image and presence with such subtlety overpowered him and he froze in mid-sentence. He wanted to run, get as far away as he could. He was mortified, shaken to his core. He could not make himself look away from her. He wanted his Aunt to say something to save him from this. He wanted to look at her and beg her to stop this before it started. He was like a captured wild animal. In that instant he understood the terror in the heart of a deer as it looked into the lights of an oncoming car. "I changed his diapers," Nova said, her laughter as light as a rustle of leaves in a gentle wind, "I think I'll be okay." Barbara's eyes never left him. "Bring one of those large pillows over here," she said, pointing to the smaller couch in the corner. AJ followed her instruction as though his will had been loaned out. "Place it here on the floor, along with the lotion and towel." She pointed to the floor at her feet. Again he did as instructed, but this time their eyes met again. "Now take all of your clothes off and neatly fold them." He was frozen in place again, watching here eyes. She waited patiently, intently meeting his gaze. He was terrified, but could not make himself leave. Hell, he could not make himself move. Time edged slowly...her gaze never wavered, her expression caught between a gentle smile and a firm commanding glare. He was not sure when he reached down and began to pull the T-shirt over his head, but as he did something inside of him began to change. The terror became a torturous excitement, his breathing erratic. He undid his belt and pushed his pants to the floor, aware that his penis was a bulge in his white cotton underwear and his groin was in exquisite pain. He folded his pants and laid it on the floor, imagining such lurid thoughts. What was Nova thinking of him right now? Hell, this was her idea. Did she know this was going to happen? Did he want this to happen? Did it matter anymore what he wanted? Was there anyway he could stop now? He stood up and froze again for a moment. He sensed that something crucial was about to happen to him mentally and physically. Something about him was going to change forever. His thumbs found the elastic of his underwear and began to push them down. Her gaze never left his eyes, a powerful insistent demand. His erect penis sprang forth as he pushed his underwear down, it felt on the ragged edge of release. He was certain Nova gasped quietly, but he did not dare look away from Barbara as he bent down to place his shorts on top of his jeans. "Very good Love," she said, her voice seeping into him as she leaned forward and put a hand on firmly his shoulder to keep him from rising back up. "Such a good boy...so nice to see you hard for me...it makes me feel warm and desired...kneel here on the pillow now." He felt such admiration for her. He loved her at that moment. He would do anything for her...anything she told him to do. He squatted and turned to put his knees on the pillow, then looked up uncertainly at Nova. She seemed to be in awe of what she was watching happen. "Now look at me love," Barbara said sternly. He followed her instructions without hesitating. "Each time I give you an instruction, you will reply by saying 'Yes Maam, thank you'. Do you understand?" He nodded. "Good...remove my boots." "Yes Maam, Thank You," he said, the words tumbling from his mouth and a rush of such overpowering desire that he almost passed out. He quickly removed each of her boots and set them aside. Her feet were warm, the smell of sweat and musk, but he did not mind at all. In fact the smell added to his arousal. "Use the lotion to rub my right foot." Each word she spoke was like a special reward. He was in a rush to please her as he poured lotion in his hand and took the near foot in his lap. When he realized his several mistakes it startled and shamed him "I'm very sorry," he said, "yes maam...thank you." He set the left foot aside and concentrated on the right foot. "Good Boy," she said, reaching to pet his head several times. It should have been embarrassing. It should have felt like he was being demeaned, but it was exactly the opposite. He reveled in how she treated him. With that she and Nova were back to sharing stories from younger days in Portland. She paused to correct him several times on each foot, explaining to pull each toe with the thumb and several fingers, kneed the balls forcefully with thumbs on the bottom and fingers spread gently on top, and scratch the heels gently with one hand while rubbing the fingers of the other hand between her toes and spreading them out gently. Nova poured them wine and for almost an hour AJ went vigorously about his work as they talked. His erection subsided slowly as his hands began to ache, but he worked at her feet vigorously, concentrating on the areas she had instructed him. Under her direction he massaged her calves with the firm pressure of his fingertips; kneading away at what she described her tight high heel muscles. Eventually Nova rose to take the wine glasses to the kitchen. The smile she gave him was a familiar one - the same smile of satisfaction when everything for a family gathering was finished and perfect. "I'm going to the pool now," she announced as she returned, then turned and strolled down the hallway. AJ glanced over his shoulder, continuing to work, but did not answer. He had discovered that he could do both calves at the same time and the look of pleasure and satisfaction on Barbara's face as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes was a mighty reward. She stayed that way for several minutes, then raised her head and reached to pet him. "You're a fast learner Love," she said, "but you're going to put me to sleep if you keep that up." "Whatever you want...that's fine with me." She abruptly pulled her legs away from him, sitting forward on the couch, and put a hand to each side of his face. Her eyes seemed to bore into him as she pulled her face close to his. "You are a gorgeous young man, and God knows I've just danced through a dozen fantasies about you and I together, but that's not why I'm here." He just stared into her eyes until she half-spanked both of his cheeks and sat back. The action stunned him. He felt vulnerable again. Kneeling naked on a pillow in front of her, for the first time in more than an hour the calm and contentedness left him. He could not help but quietly chuckle at his situation. A gorgeous smile beamed across her face and her manner was completely different in an instant. "That's good...let's talk about this." "Okay...you want me to get dressed?" "No, stay as you are...your knees may bother you a little and you're going to get hard a few times while we talk...that's natural...just accept it. This is very serious, what we're going to do. You must trust me... completely and without reservation...whatever you feel, just let it happen. If I ask you a question, answer it honestly and completely. Remember how you felt about me while you were rubbing my feet... remember that I am your friend and that I am here to help you understand and control what is going on in your head. Can you do that?" "I suppose so," he replied, chuckling again as he looked down at himself. "No," she snapped. Her expression was harsh when he looked up at her. "To suppose is not enough. Better to never start this journey than to start it with half your heart. May I call you John Henry?" "Yes Maam," he replied, struggling with the shock of her response. "Good. John Henry, you must decide right now that you will follow my instructions until we are done...this is only going to work if you give yourself completely over to me and trust what I will teach you. You have sexually submissive tendencies...rather strong ones...as did your father from what I understand...this little exercise has confirmed it. Now, I can teach you to give yourself to the deep powerful emotions you felt while you were rubbing my feet, to enjoy that feeling without fear and misgiving for right person in the right situation. I can teach you how to choose and decide and have as much control as you want, but you must be absolutely committed to this. Is that what you want?" "Yes Maam." It embarrassed him that he had answered so quickly, but he knew the truth of it without taking time to consider. Eva's words - 'with all you heart, with all you might, and with all your soul'. "Then I will teach you...I will stay until it is time for me to go. When we are finished, I will leave and you will never see me again. Do you understand?" "Yes...Maam." He frowned at the mental image of her leaving. "When I call you Love or Pet, you will serve me immediately and without reservation. When I call you John Henry then we will speak as teacher and student. You will say, 'question Maam?' and wait for my response. Understand?" "Yes Maam." It was like walking down a very steep one way path, with no going back. He understood. His sense of total admiration and devotion for her was coming back as she spoke. He struggled to focus. She seemed to notice. "You will go to work as you normally do, but all of the rest of your time is mine to decide. You will remain naked at all times while we are together." He struggled to keep his mouth closed. "Question...Maam?" he asked. "Why naked?" she replied. "It will be a constant distraction, force you to focus and concentrate...but of course, the most important reason is because I enjoy how it makes me feel to have that power. And I'm sure you enjoy it too...don't you?" "Yes Maam." He chuckled again. "Good...we shall begin now." She stood up in front him, forcing him to sit back on heels to look up at her. She reached down and slowly began to pull the hem of her skirt up, up across her thighs, her intense gaze never leaving him. He glanced at her legs, then up at her eyes, then back her exposed upper thighs, then her eyes again. Her black lace panties came into view and the conflict of where he was supposed to look was almost more than his mind could stand. She pulled her skirt up until both of her hands rested on her hips holding the bunched up skirt high enough that all of her panties were completely exposed. He breathed in deep the smell of her loins, looking at the heavenly spot where the V formed, the musty smell intoxicating him. "Remove my panties," she commanded. He was trembling slightly as he reached up to her waste. His breathing was raspy, coming in small gulps. His fingers found the top of the flimsy lace material and inched down over the swell of her hips. The material caught slightly at the bottom of the V, and she spread her knees slightly to allow the southern journey to continue. The hair of her sex was a narrow thin tuff of dark brown hair, the folds of her labia full like an open butterfly hanging down. The moment was breathtaking and it was all he could do to pull his eyes away as he gently lowered the lace panties to her feet. She raised one foot, then the other, to allow him to completely remove them. "Hold them to your nose...look into my eyes and breathe in deeply." He followed her directions, astounded by the effect it had on him. He felt like someone else, mesmerized by her. She put a hand lightly on his head and raised her right foot to cushion of the couch. The dark pink butterfly opened its wings before him. "Kiss me there." He touched his mouth to her lips, entranced by the smell. "Now lick it." He tentatively touched his tongue to her labia, spreading them even more with the tip as the pungent taste assaulted him. Her hand directed his head as he tried to pull back. She forced his mouth and nose into the wet soft folds of her womanhood, then held him there. He licked again, then again, and then sucked the folds of her labia into his mouth. The smell and the taste and the texture of her warm and wet pussy consumed his senses like a bath of lust. "I want my juices all over your face," she commanded. Her bold command in turn instilled boldness within him. He eagerly complied, giving himself completely to the reckless abandon of the moment and his actions. His hands found the fleshy skin of the lower cheeks of her butt, and he buried his face in her vagina. She moaned loudly and spread her right leg out even farther to give him better access to her. The pressure of her hand on the back of his head smashed his nose and mouth into her wetness until his cheeks and chin were covered with it. She ground his face against her for almost a minute, moaning loudly several times, then suddenly put her hand on his forehead and pulled his face away. She pushed and twisted his head back until he looked up at her. The pungent and acrid smell and taste of her swirled around and through him. She lowered her right leg to the floor and allowed her skirt to drop in front of him, then she quickly sat down on the couch. Her hands moved gently to caress and hold his face, and she leaned forward and kissed him long and hard. She pulled away and smiled, then licked and smacked her lips. "I taste and smell a little strong, don't I?" "I...uh...wow!" He was in a daze and loved it with every part of his being. "Yes, it was nice wasn't it?...you show great promise Love. A man like you excites a woman like me...more than you will probably ever know." She slapped his face gently with both hands. Her smile slipped away and she gave him an intense appraisal. "Now listen John Henry," she snapped. "First lesson and most important lesson."