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There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 01

By: Prolonged_Debut10



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it notated now, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be few and far between. This is going to be a "SHORT STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into Novels or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.' 

ATTN: The first man you are going to meet in this story is named "Even," not "Evan." "Even" as in "Even and Odd." If you think that is weird, wait until you read this story; it only gets worse!" 

***** 

1. It Was A Bad Way To Start My Day 

My friend, and attorney, Rod Laver called me at 7:30 AM MST to tell me he had some bad news for me. He always started his conversations with me that way, so I asked him, which patent was turned down." 

"Even I'm sorry, but it's much worse than that. I received a call from the Waterville Police Department. Your parents and your sister were killed while trying to cross railroad tracks ahead of an oncoming train. 

They were speeding on their way to the hospital to check on Julius' injury. He suffered was hurt during a football game with his friends. He died on the way to the hospital. I am so sorry for your loss." 

"Rod, I haven't seen or spoken to most of them in nearly 10 years. You know the whole story. I never expected to lose all of them at the same time. I am not going to go there. It will be hard to see them lined up like dominoes, especially my sister. There is no sense to go there, anyway. They are all gone. Contact a lawyer in Waterville, and have them buried together. Have him settle the estate, and give the money to a local women's charity in Divines' name. We were very close." 

"Even you have to go to Waterville. You have to bring your niece back here with you. You are her godfather, and legal guardian. You are the only family she has left. She is 16 years old, and you are responsible for her until she is 18." 

"THERE MUST BE A MISTAKE!" You know I can't deal with women. I hide when the housekeepers come to clean this house. What am I supposed to do with a 16-year-old girl? She was supposed to go to his sister." 

"Apparently your sister was able to make a change, and made you her guardian. It might not be so bad, because according to her dossier, she is almost as smart as you are. Her IQ is 183. Her school grades don't show that capability though. She is a C or below student. It is possible that you two can help each other out." 

"Don't try to humor me Rod. Send her to a boarding school for the next 2 years. I will pay all expenses, and make sure she has enough money to last her for the rest of her life. She cannot live in this house with me. She is a female, and I do not know how to deal with females." 

"You knew how to deal with Tammy Hopkins." 

"Rod, she was 7 years old, and when I gave her a Valentine's Day card, she smacked me." 

"If you knew how to spell back then, you would have been king of the classroom. You remember what you wrote on her Valentines' day card? "Tammy, you are a sweet as an all-day fucker." Every girl in the class would have smacked you. If you had put an 'S' instead of that 'F' on that card, she might have kissed you." 

"Rod, you can't remember to file my taxes on time, but you can remember a story from 26 years ago." 

"I always file an extension for your taxes. You have never been audited by the IRS, and you have never been fined. I will rent a private jet to fly you to Maine tomorrow morning. Do you want me to send someone over to pack your clothes, or are you going to remember to pack underwear?" 

"Be nice to your only client Rod, or you will wind up being an ambulance chaser for the rest of your life." 

"I always wanted to buy an expensive pair of 'Air Jordan's. This will finally give me an excuse to put them down as a business expense. Do you want me to come along with you?" 

"You had better be on that aircraft with me. I need someone who will be able to speak to Delicious." 

"Who the hell is Delicious?" 

"She is my niece. The 16-year-old female with the 183 IQ; the one you want me to live with her for the next 2 years. Find me a boarding school in Denver; I know there is none here in Idaho Springs." 

"I have a thought Even; and don't scream at me until I finish saying what's on my mind. Why don't you homeschool her? Apparently, she does not relate well to people. It reminds me of her uncle, who does not relate well to women, or men without a scientific background. She can take her courses online, and she can talk to the male of the household, about any problem she may be having. You can yell at me now." 

I didn't yell at my friend; I slammed the phone instead. I believe he understood my answer. 

At 12 PM his secretary called, and told me to be at the Denver airport at 8 AM for our flight to the Robert La Fleur airport, in Waterville Maine. I asked her which Denver airport, and she replied, "The old one." 

I detest getting up early in the morning, because I do my best work starting late in the evening, and working until the wee small hours of the morning. If there is one thing I have learned living at 11,000 feet above sea level, it is any moisture on the roads turns to ice very quickly. Black ice on black roads leads to many fatal accidents, especially when you are driving downhill to the Mile High City: Denver, Colorado.' 

I called a car service, Yes; Idaho Springs does have a car service, and asked them to pick me up as soon as possible, and take me to the closest hotel to the old Denver International airport. 

One hour later, a GMC Yukon stopped at my perimeter gate. I put in the security code, which lowered the concrete posts, and opened the security gates to let him in to my compound. I threw my bag into the back seat, and rode shotgun. From my home, just west of Idaho Springs, to the airport hotel was a little more than 90 miles. For the majority of the trip, the driver barely had to touch the gas pedal, due to the steep declines through the rugged mountain terrain, and we were going well over 60 miles an hour, on Interstate 70. If you ever have a chance to come this way, try to keep at least one eye on the road, because the scenery up here is magnificent, and the guardrails will not keep you from driving over the side of the mountain. 

****** 

Once I was ensconced in my room, I took out the latest tome on the "Micro-Digital Implantation of Sub-Cellular Diagnostics, and Functional Memory Enhancement," written by my friend and MIT colleague Suh Andrehardra. Of the 1300 pages I read so far, I sent four emails to him, advising him I found eight computation errors on his work. I did not say what they were, for fear they might be picked up by a hacker, and sold to another scientist doing research in the same area. I mailed them to his address at the Scripps Institute in Jupiter Florida, in a plain white envelope, with no return address. 

He was, and still is not very unhappy with me. We have been having a rather non-collegial discourse over these facts and figures for the past 3 months. He refuses to believe he is wrong, while I laugh knowing I am correct. We have a $1 wager on the outcome of his next test, which will occur in four months' time. 

At MIT, our colleagues had bet on which one of us could squeeze a penny harder. It turned out to be a tie, and Professor Gilchrest won. He received $18 for his efforts, because everyone in our Microbiology class bet $1 each. We were all poor students at the time, and had to make each penny count. 

******* 

We took off at 8:15 AM MST, and landed in Waterville at 2:55 PM EST. I rested, and slept the entire way across the continent, even though Rod did not shut up from takeoff through landing. It is a gift I learned, while sitting through boring lectures and seminars. There was no one at the airport to greet us, not that I expected anyone to be there. 

Rod drove us straight to the Funeral Home, using the GPS that was installed in the vehicle. It was worse than I thought. There were three closed caskets, and one open casket containing the body of my brother, Julius Mark. Sitting in the last row was a teenage girl, with an elderly woman attempting to console her. The youngster was inappropriately dressed for this occasion. She was wearing a miniskirt that barely covered her essentials. Her see-through top displayed her young breasts for everyone to see. I was appalled. 

Rod whispered, "Now that is what I call 'Delicious'." 

I whipped around and said, "That is my niece?" 

My friend smiled and nodded his head. 

Apparently I said it loud enough for the young woman to hear. She looked at the way I was dressed and said, "Holy Fuck, you're 'Even;' eat shit and die; I am not going to live with a dork." 

I was incensed. I don't know where my courage came from or where the words were formed, because I never have the courage to speak to a woman. I always stuttered and stammered when I tried to speak face-to-face with any woman, but not now. This time I said, "Fantastic, I don't want a hooker living in my house either. How much do you charge for a blow job?" 

Rod couldn't control himself, as he laughed. These were the first words I had with the opposite sex, in nearly 18 years, and I asked about the price of a blowjob. 

She said, "I don't charge, I give them out for free." 

Apparently, my brain was on automatic and it continued rolling. It said, "Okay, let's get in front of your mother's coffin; get down on your knees, and give me a good one, just like she would." 

Delicious came at me just as the freight train did that day our family died. She pounded my head and chest with all the fury that was stored up inside her. "Don't you ever speak about my mother that way." 

I kept going, letting her vent all the anger and frustration inside her body and soul, since the accident. 

"My sister was a hooker just like you. Who else gets pregnant at 16 years old? She was screwing everybody and anybody who asked, since she was in grammar school. I was surprised it took her so long to get pregnant." 

Delicious was livid as I continued to demean her mother. She went on hitting and cursing at me, until she finally ran out of strength, and cried out, "Mom told me she was a virgin when she went to Cape Cod for Spring Break and met Julius. He promised to pull out before he came, because he did not have any condoms. He said it was his first time too." 

"Naturally, being young and impressionable, you believed her. She was a slut. She dressed like you, and went to school without panties or a bra. She would step in to the janitor's closet with any boy that asked. She would get fucked quickly, and go to her next class with semen dripping down her leg. She was a running joke." 

"She was not a slut; she took great care of me. She loved me, and taught me everything I know." 

"Yes, I can tell; just look at the way you are dressed for her funeral. You are dressed nearly identical to the way she used to go to school. Do you have panties on under that thing that is supposed to resemble a skirt?" 

"Why, do you want to take a look?" 

"Why not, I saw my sister parading around our house naked all the time. You probably aren't much different than she was. A hooker is a hooker, a slut is a slut. Let me see what you have under there, if anything? Do you shave?" 

Rod hit me on my shoulder and said, "Even, stop this." 

"Rod, you can have her after I am finished with her. Actually, she can take us both on at the same time. She is probably familiar with double teaming." 

Delicious screamed. "My mother helped me keep my head on straight. She taught me how to keep boys away from me. That's why I am still a virgin." 

I laughed. "You are a virgin, like I am an astronaut." 

"You bastard; my mother drilled it into my head so I wouldn't wind up like she did. She didn't want me to be in a loveless marriage, with a husband that screwed any woman who spread her thighs. She couldn't leave him because there wasn't enough money, and our bills were too high. Her parents wouldn't help her, because they forced her to marry him. You were no help, because you never talked to anyone. Mom would not beg you for anything. She knew how wealthy you were, but she wouldn't ask you for a penny. She got herself into the mess she was in, and was determined to make sure I didn't fall into the same trap. I didn't care about my father or my grandparents, because in my book they were all bastards. They did not care about my mother. These people won't even let me look at her, because she was hurt so badly." 

"Have you eaten today?" She 

"No." 

I turned to Rod and told him I was taking my niece to dinner. He knew I wanted him to move heaven and earth to have my sister look as beautiful in death as she was in life. I wanted Delicious to be able to look upon and touch her mother one last time. 

I reached out my hand for Delicious to take, and much to my joy she did. I led her out to the car and stopped. I asked her if she knew how to drive. 

"Yes, but I don't have a license." 

"As long as you know how to drive, who cares?" 

I threw her the keys, and for the first time she smiled. She got behind the wheel, adjusted her seat, and mirrors. Then she asked, "Where are we going?" 

"This is your town, where do you want to eat?" 

"There is a really fancy restaurant just west of Interstate 95. I would love to go there, but we could never afford it." 

"If it is fancy, I will not let you go there looking as you are. We have to go clothes shopping first. Where is the finest women's store in town?" 

"It's in the same shopping plaza as the restaurant. Their clothes are very nice, but very expensive." 

"I have never shopped for a woman, and as you can tell by looking at me, I am not too good at shopping for myself either. I am going to ask for help from the people that work in the store. I will ask for your opinion. My opinion will be the tiebreaker. I am not going to buy you a lot of clothes here, but when we get to Denver, I will get someone to help outfit you completely. You will never again dress as you are now, because I will not allow it. You are going to live with me for 2 years minimum. If you want to leave me after that time, I will make sure you never are at a loss for money. Let's go shopping." 

I didn't remember how small Waterville was, but in less than five minutes we were outside a large store devoted to women only. Delicious walked in ahead of me, and a greeter said to her, "We don't serve your kind here." 

She turned and ran out of the store crying, right into my arms. She told me what happened. 

I said to her, "Come with me." 

We walked, hand in hand, back into the store, and Delicious pointed out the woman who had insulted her. 

I walked up to her, with Delicious standing slightly behind me. I asked her if she was the manager of the store. 

She said, "No." 

"Do you own this store?" 

She replied, "No." 

"Is either the owner or manager available?" 

"The owner is in the store; would you like to speak to him?" 

"Yes please, as quickly as possible." 

Robert Morningside approached me, and asked how he might help me. I said, "This woman insulted my niece, when she entered your store. I want her fired, immediately." 

Mister Morningside looked at Delicious and laughed. "I would have insulted your niece also, because of the way she is dressed. She looks like a whore." 

"Mister Morningside do you have a mortgage on this store?" 

"I don't believe that's any of your business." 

"My attorney will find out within 24 hours. Within 60 hours, I will own that mortgage. If you are one day late with a payment, I will start foreclosure proceedings against you. Even if you become current, your interest rate will go up to the maximum allowed by law. You will never have a day's rest again, while you own this store." 

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" 

"Google the name 'Even Luck'; look at the picture, and my net worth. See if this employee is worth the trouble I am about to cause you." 

A few minutes later he came running back to the front of the store and said, "Sally you are fired. Come back to the store on Tuesday to pick up your final paycheck." 

"But, Mister Morningside..." 

"Pick up your belongings and leave, Sally." 

"Mister Luck, how may we assist your niece?" 

"I want the clothes she is almost wearing burned. I want your best people to help her pick out clothing that fits her age group. The most expensive you have. At least 14 sets of undergarments; six pair of slacks, a dozen blouses, six skirts, four dresses, and calfskin knee-length leather coat. I want her to look like a 16 year old debutante, who attends Bowdoin College." 

Delicious looked at me as if I was crazy. I thought she was going to rebel, but she said, "Dresses; I've never worn a dress." 

"You also have an IQ of 183, and you have never received an 'A' on your report card. Would you like to discuss that now, or over dinner?" 

"I am only going to be living with you for 2 years. It would take longer than that to this explain everything." 

"I want you to know that I have not had a conversation this long, with any woman, outside of school, in nearly 18 years. I have said more to you in the last hour than I have with any woman, since grammar school. I do not relate well to the female of the species. When my cleaning service comes to my home, I run down into the basement, so I do not have to see or talk to them. I am a scientist, I love what I do, and I do it with my computers. I understand them, and they understand me. I can relate to my fellow scientists, because we speak the same language. I can speak to my attorney, Rod, because he has been my friend since childhood. I am his only client, and we are closer than brothers. 

Three women approached us, and one of them said, "Honey, you have to come with us to the dressing room." 

I growled at the woman. "My nieces name is Delicious; use it." 

"Yes sir." 

"Delicious, if you would come this way please." 

Delicious looked at me and asked, "Do you want me to model my underwear for you?" 

I smiled. "Of course I do; first the bras, then the panties, and then both together." 

Stunned, she said, "You don't mean that do you?" 

"Your mother was a virgin, until she went to Cape Cod. We were inseparable as kids." 

"What happened that separated everyone?" 

"You are only going to be living with me for 2 years. It would take longer than that to explain everything." 

She frowned. "You are not supposed to use my own words against me." 

"Go put some panties on, before I raise your skirt and find out what's not underneath there." 

Delicious smiled at me, as the three women escorted her to the dressing room. 

The sign on the front door stated they closed at 7 PM. The staff loaded the back seat and the trunk of the car with all our purchases at 8:45 PM. The storeowner smiled as he swiped my American Express card, and it was approved for $19,640.83. They did not have the calfskin coat. 

Delicious said, "I could have bought a car for that amount of money." 

I replied, "Right now, I could eat a horse. I'm starving." 

"Me too; let's get to the restaurant in a hurry. It's about to close." 

We walked into the restaurant just in time. Delicious looked at the menu with eyes so wide I thought they were going to pop out of her head. 


There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 01



"Can I order whatever I want?" 

"You can order two of anything you want, and one thing you don't want." 

She furrowed her eyebrows at me, and shook her head. She decided on the 3-pound Maine lobster, with scallops, shrimp, asparagus, and a baked potato. 

It was my turn to shake my head. 

When dinner arrived I asked her, "How much do you weigh, and how big are you?" 

"I weigh 117 pounds, and I am 5'7." 

"I'll give you $100 if you finish everything on your plate." 

"You may as well take out your money now, because you have never seen me eat." 

I had ordered the North Atlantic salmon with asparagus and broccoli. 

Delicious looked at me and asked, "How much do you weigh, and how big are you?" 

"I think there's an echo in this restaurant. I weigh 192 pounds, and I am 6'1." 

"How do you eat so little, and weigh so much?" 

"How do you eat so much, and weigh so little?" 

Delicious giggled. "There is an echo in this restaurant." 

"I get very little exercise sitting over my computer keyboard, and working on my experiments. My home is very isolated, which I absolutely love, and a national park is my backyard. You may very well hate it, because there are no children your age around. We are about 20 miles west of the downtown area of Idaho Springs, which is smaller than Waterville. We will talk about your schooling later, once we understand what you have been going through here. Rod believes you will do better being homeschooled. You may want to think about that possibility. He tends to think that you are a lot like me, in that you don't relate to people very well. In two years if you decide you want to attend college, there are many good ones in the Denver area. I think the best one for you will be the Air Force Academy, where they will regiment you, strictly." 

She looked into my eyes from across the table. "You are yanking my chain, I can tell." 

"Already, damn I was hoping it would last a whole day." 

She giggled again, and it was a very sweet sound. From a young girl, who was deeply depressed 6 hours ago, to the young girl smiling across the table from me, there was a vast difference. The tension in her face was gone. She was wearing a new long sleeve blouse and slacks. The only remaining item from her previous outfit were her ratty sneakers. We would take care of that in the morning, before returning to the funeral home. The burial would be Saturday, and it would be a very tough day for her. 

***** 

I was in the middle of eating my salmon, when I looked up and saw all that remained of the lobster was its shell. Thank God for that plastic bib, because there was butter everywhere. She skipped the scallops and shrimp, and inhaled the asparagus without breathing. I asked her if that was the result of her blowjob practice. 

When she laughed, she nearly spit a spear back at me. 

The baked potato was the next item to disappear from her plate. When she finished cutting it up, adding ½ pound of butter, a tub of sour cream and salt, it looked like mashed potato soup, with skin. It took her longer to make that concoction than to eat it. She stopped to breathe, and take a small sip of her diet 7-Up. I was so engrossed in watching her eat; my salmon was still sitting on my plate getting cold. 

As she skewered the first scallop, I reached into my jacket pocket, took out my wallet, and extracted a $100 bill. There was no sense waiting any longer. The scallops and shrimp did not stand a chance. 

She licked her lips, pulled the $100 bill from my hand, and looked at my plate. "Are you going to eat that?" 

I looked at my poor, cold salmon. "If you want it, it's yours." 

She pushed her plate aside, and took mine. She started eating the salmon, when I reached across and took a piece of broccoli from my plate. 

She said, "Hey, you said that was mine." 

I replied, "Sue me." 

After paying the bill, and standing up to leave, her tummy didn't even have a bulge. "Where, in God's name, did that child put it all?" 

******* 

I would not allow her to go back to her home and stay alone all night, because I would not sleep there. I took her to my hotel and tried to get a room close to mine. It was Wild Turkey hunting season and every room was full. They had one two-bedroom suite remaining. I asked her if she would be uncomfortable sleeping in the same apartment with me, but in a separate bedroom. 

She said, "No." 

I changed rooms, and had the valet bring all her packages from the car and from my room up to the suite. He jokingly asked her if she bought out the store. 

"No," she said, "just everything in my size." 

The valet laughed, and accepted the large gratuity I handed him." 

At 11:30 PM, I told Delicious to take a shower, or a bath, and get into bed. I would wake her up at 8 AM. We would have breakfast in the suite and buy her shoes on the way to the funeral home. 

She dropped her head, not knowing what to do or say to me after everything we had done together that evening. Finally, she approached me, pecked me on the cheek, and thanked me for making a horrible day into a good day. 

I said, "Baby, the next two days are going to be very hard for you. I will be at your side every moment to help you through them. When they are done, every day afterwards will get better. I will make sure the world is at your feet. If you do your share of the work, I will do more than my share to help you. You will have a wonderful life; I promise. I really adored my sister. Rod believes we can help each other. I believe that may be the truth. You have helped me already. I haven't talked this much to anyone in decades. I cannot believe how much you remind me of her. You are lovely reincarnation of my sister. I will love you as much as I loved her." 

"Thank you, Uncle Even, I will try." 

"I'll make a deal with you; if you don't call me Uncle Even, I won't call you Niece Delicious." 

She didn't giggle this time, she laughed. She laughed a 'Divine' laugh. I have no idea where my extended family tree came up with these ridiculous names, but I thank the good Lord my parents did not have another boy. Can you imagine walking around with the name 'Odd Luck' for the rest of your life? 

I believe my sister named this wonderful child 'Delicious' to assuage my parent's sensibilities, because they forced her into the marriage with Julius, and saw what he was doing to her. 

My father did not have an easy name to live with either, even though in Greek mythology he was the Father of the Titans. However, walking around the greater Boston area with the name 'Uranus Luck' led to many brutal fights and quite a few giggles from girls. 

My mother had it easier because she was named for the Greek Goddess of the Grain, Demiter. Demiter Childs is easier to walk around with than Uranus Luck. How she got past the giggle factor, and married him, I will never know. 

Then I was born, and they had the nerve to call me 'Even'. I could have been normal with the change of one letter. I could have been 'Evan Luck', instead of Even Luck. I swear they were demented. The next year, when my sister was born they proved they were out of their minds by naming her 'Divine'. How stupid was that? You brand a new baby with an impossible standard, seconds after she is born that she has to carry for the remainder of her life. 

My sister becomes pregnant because of the spring break tryst and because my parents force her to marry this bastard, she names her child 'Delicious' to make them feel better about their decision to force her into her marriage. I can see my niece's name being used and abused by every boy and girl in school; with every crude joke imaginable. I believe my sister counseled her little treasure in ways that drove away every boy who came near her. I hope to find out more about her life, when we return to Idaho Springs, and grow closer together. 

****** 

She came out of her bedroom wrapped in a towel that almost covered her. 

She said, "We forgot to buy sleepwear." 

I turned away quickly, trying not to see what I was not supposed to see. 

"I'll give you my pajama top. You can wear that overnight. We can buy you sleepwear at the same time we buy you shoes." I handed it to her looking straight into her eyes, and nowhere else. 

I don't know why I left my door slightly open during the night, but a few minutes after 2 AM, I heard Delicious cry out, "Mommy, mommy, help me." 

I dashed out of bed, wearing my pajama bottoms, ran across the living room. I opened Delicious' door, and saw her struggling on top of her blankets. My pajama top was wrapped around her neck, exposing her upper body to me. I jumped onto the bed, and covered her breasts. I took her into my arms, and held her tight. Her bed was saturated with sweat. 

"It's okay, Delicious, I am here. I will keep you safe." 

Her eyes blinked open as she awakened, and cried out. "She's gone Uncle Even; I will never see her again. I need her in my life. I need her to teach me what to do." 

"She is always with you, baby girl." I tapped the center of her chest, and her head. "She will always be in your heart and in your mind. She will never leave you. You can talk, see, and speak to her simply by closing your eyes and looking inside yourself. You are a part of her, just as she is a part of you. Don't ever think that she will leave you alone in this life." 

"I need her to help me think things through, because I am so afraid of everything. I watched what my father did to her, with every woman he saw. He didn't hide it; he flaunted it in front of her. He is part of me also, and I don't want to be like him." 

"You will never be like your father, because he never talked to you as your wonderful mother did. He was too busy carousing around with other women to take the time to care for his own daughter. You may have part of his genetic makeup, but your mind was formed by your mother. My sister took great pains to make sure you were brought up properly. I know why she allowed you to dress and talk the way you do. We will talk about that when we get home to Colorado. Now you have to go back to sleep. It will be time to wake up soon enough." 

"Uncle Even, will you stay with me until I fall asleep." 

"Niece Delicious, I believe it would be better for you to sleep in my room. Your bed is soaked with your perspiration. Come here; I will carry you." 

I slid my arms under her knees and shoulders, and carried her into my bedroom. Either I was stronger than I thought, or she lied about being 117 pounds. She was as light as a feather. 

I placed her down lightly, and had her scoot over to the center of the bed so I could sit beside her. She snuggled under the blanket, and I waited for her to return to the arms of Hypnos. 

2. The Morning and Afternoon of the Second Day 

I must have fallen asleep sitting with my back against the headboard, because in the morning I found her sleeping with her head against my abdomen, and her arms wrapped around my legs. I didn't want to wake her up, but I had a morning erection, and it had to be taken care of soon, or my bladder would burst. 

I rubbed her shoulder in an attempt to wake her up gently. As she started to wake up, and instead of rolling away from me, she rolled right onto my erection. Her eyes opened wide. She said, "Is that what I think it is?" 

"That all depends; what do you think it is?" 

"You know what I think it is; is it?" 

"You are very bright young woman. How would I know what a very bright young woman would think it is, because I am only a man." 

"Uncle Even, is it or isn't it what I think it is?" 

"Niece Delicious, it is not bigger than a breadbox." 

"Uncle Even did I cause that?" 

"No you didn't. I have to go to the bathroom. It happens to a man every morning. In the vernacular, they call it, "Morning Wood." 

"Uncle Even are you lying to me?" 

"Niece Delicious, let's make a deal. I will never lie to you, if you promise never to lie to me. That means ever, even if I asked you the most embarrassing question about your bodily functions. If I asked 'did you take a crap today?' You have to answer me honestly. You can ask me anything about anything, and I will answer you truthfully. How does that sound to you?" 

"It sounds like you are trying to trap a 16-year-old girl into a very small box." 

"If you let me go to the bathroom and alleviate my bladder problem, I will come back and allow you to ask me 5 questions about my personal life. I will answer you truthfully, regardless of how embarrassing the questions are. How does that sound to you?" 

"Regardless of what I ask, you will tell me the truth." 

"You can even ask Rod, if I answered you truthfully. I have no secrets from him." 

"I can ask you 5 questions, and you aren't going to ask me any?" 

"You are correct." 

"When do you start asking questions of me?" 

"I start asking questions, when you have a troubled look on your face, and I think you need a friend to give you some advice. Can I go to the bathroom now please, before I make a mess on the bed?" 

"Yes, go ahead, while I think up some embarrassing questions." 

Delicious heard the telltale signs of me alleviating my bladder in the bathroom, and she became embarrassed. She heard me wash my hands, and when I walked back into the bedroom, I said, "I can tell by the blush on your cheeks, you are not accustomed to hearing a man urinate." 

"No, it was not on my things to do list." 

"Okay, do you have your questions ready for me"? 

"Yes. Question number 1. At what age where you when you saw a magazine like Playboy?" 

"I was 9 years old, and it was Hustler magazine." 

"Question number 2. At what age did you see your first naked woman?" 

"I was 15 years old." 

"Question number 3. What was her name?" 

"Divine." 

Delicious' jaw dropped to the floor, when she heard her mother's name mentioned. 

"Would you like to explain that to me?" 

"Is that a question?" 

"Yes, dammit, it is. Question number 4. How and why did you see my mother naked?" 

"Delicious that is two questions." 

"For this question and answer period, it is one question." 

"Your mother didn't know my car was in for repairs. She thought she was home alone, but I was in my bedroom, which is directly across from the bathroom. My door was closed when she went into the bathroom to take a shower. She came out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her head, and nothing around her body. I opened my bedroom door as she exited the bathroom. We looked at each other and screamed. It was the first time I realized she shaved." 

Delicious laughed. "What happened next?" 

"Is that a question?" 

"Dammit Uncle Even, question number 5, what happened next?" 

"It was very funny. Every time we looked at each other, or passed each other in the hallway, we would laugh at one another. Our parents asked us what was going on between us. We told them it was a private joke. It took us nearly a month to get over it. Honestly, I don't think we ever did, until I left for college." 

"Question number 6. When was the first time you had sex?" 

"Young miss; I said you could ask 5 questions, not 6." 

"Come on Uncle Even, that's not fair. I never expected you to say the first woman you ever saw naked was my mother." 

"In life, Niece Delicious, you have to expect the unexpected." 

"Please Uncle Even, answer the question; it's very important that I know." 

"There is only one other person in this world who knows the answer to that question, and I have known him for 28 years. I knew you when you were a baby, but you could not talk back then. I've known you for less than a day, how do I know I can I trust you not to repeat this answer to anyone?" 

"I swear on my mother, I will never tell another soul the answer to this question." 

"First, let me tell you I am not gay. However, if what you said to me at the funeral home is true, I am like you. To this day, I have not had intercourse." 

Delicious' facial features froze. I could see my statement rolling around in her brain trying to make sense of my answer, but unable to come up with a satisfactory conclusion. Finally, her eyes returned to normal size, her mouth closed, and she licked her dry lips. She asked, "But why, you're not bad looking, and you have more money than you know what to do with? Women should be crawling all over you." 

I smiled, "Our question and answer period has concluded for today. It's now time for you to order breakfast, while I shower, shave, and get ready for the day. I want you to dress in a skirt and blouse, or a dress. Later today I will take you to a salon and try to have them do something with your hair." 

"What's the matter with my hair?" 

"Besides the split ends, uneven color, and your attempts at keeping your bangs straight; everything." 

"Uncle Even, I don't know about this 'honesty' thing. I'm getting ready to punch you." 

"Niece Delicious, as long as I am allowed to punch you back, you go for it." 

"You wouldn't hit a girl." 

"Would you like to bet my $100 on it?" 

"It's my $100, and no, I don't want to bet it." 

"Is there a chicken in this room; because all I hear is clucking." 

"Go take your shower Uncle Even; I am beginning not to like you." 

"Order breakfast for 6, Niece Delicious, I want to find out where you put all that food. Make sure you are dressed beautifully, because I'm going to invite Rod to join us at 9 AM." 

"Do you have anything particular in mind?" 

"No, as long as you start out with panties and a bra, anything else will be fine." 

"If you stop calling me Niece Delicious, I will stop calling you Uncle Even." 

"I swear everywhere we go there is an echo." 

"You are wasting time Even. My stomach is growling. Call your friend, and get ready for the day. I will take care of everything else." 

"I see that you are starting to do your share of the work. Make sure you order breakfast for six: Four for you, and one each for a Rod and me." 

"I will just order the left side of the menu." 

I headed for the safety of the bathroom and said, "As long as the blueberry pancakes are on the left side of the menu, it is fine with me." 

I closed the bathroom door just in time not to get hit by a pillow. 

****** 

Rod screamed at me. "Where the hell are you? I called your room last night and some drunk answered the phone. I called the front desk and asked for your room number. They said it was against hotel policy to give out a room number, or call a room after 10 PM. I didn't know if you were dead or alive." 

"Rod, it's nice to know that someone missed me. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I am in Suite B on the 14th floor." 

"I'm sorry, can I speak to my client please. His name is Even Luck. He buys store brand foods; and will drive 20 miles to save $.03 on a gallon of gasoline. He would not rent a suite in a hotel if they shoved a rocket shoved up his ass, and lit the fuse." 

"Rod, if you think that is bad, wait until you have to pay my American Express bill next month. Maybe you should open it while you are in the hospital emergency room. You will have a heart attack, because I took Delicious shopping. We talked for hours. She reminds me so much of my sister. I spent a ton of money on her wardrobe." 

There was no acknowledgment from the other end of the phone. I waited for 30 seconds, before I asked, "Rod are you all right?" 

"I'm calling the police on the house phone. Someone has taken over the body of my friend, Even Luck. He doesn't spend money on personal items, no less on someone he just met." 

"Rod I want you to be up here at 9 AM, for breakfast. Don't be late. Did you take care of the item I asked you to do yesterday?" 

"Yes I did. The reason they did not do anything to the bodies was because there was going to be no one to pay for it. I told them I didn't care what happened to your parents, but your sister was to look like an angel by the time we returned today." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 01



"Thank you Rod, I'll see you at 9." 

****** 

Delicious dazzled me when she walked out of the bedroom. She was not wearing makeup; but she had brushed her hair to a fine luster. She was wearing a knee length gray pencil skirt, with a light green long sleeve blouse that brought out the color of her deep green eyes. She knew this is the way her mother would have wanted her to dress; however, it would have attracted every boy in town, instead of repelling them. She would not be safe dressed like this, but she felt safe now, because I had promised to protect her. In her heart and mind she knew I would do just that. 

"Wow, do you clean up nice. You would grace the cover of any teen magazine, and if your breasts were larger, Sports Illustrated would die to put you into a bikini, and photograph you on a beach." 

Delicious' face turned bright red, and she dropped her head in embarrassment. 

"Don't do that; you are a gorgeous young woman, and you deserve all the praise bestowed upon you. If you don't believe me, wait until Rod walks through that door. Look at his reaction when he sees you. If that doesn't tell you how beautiful you are, nothing will." 

A few moments later there was a knock at the door, and I asked, "Who is it?" 

Rod answered, "It's me you idiot. I've come to see if my client has lost his mind." 

I took Delicious by the hand, and placed her were Rod would see her as he entered the room. I opened the door and purposely blocked his view. 

"Good morning Rod, welcome to my humble abode." 

I turned aside, and let him walk in. "Are you out of your..." 

His mind and tongue stopped working as he took in the vision of beauty that was my niece, Delicious. He tried to speak, but couldn't. All he could do was stutter. Ever since I had known him, he was never at a loss for words. He was the perfect attorney; no one could shut him up. 

Finally he composed himself and asked, "Who the heck is she?" 

"You should know, you introduced me to her." 

He walked over to the young woman and extended his hand. "Hello, my name is Rod Laver. I'm sorry, but I don't recall your name." 

"We met yesterday Mister Laver. My name is Delicious Mark." 

"Holy Shit, do you have an evil twin?" 

"Uncle Even, do you want to hit him, or should I?" 

"You better do it, because you will be charged as a juvenile, and get off with a slap on the wrist. If I hit him, they would throw me in jail, and he would sue me for a ton of money." 

"Delicious, what happened to you overnight?" 

"I am only going to be living with Uncle Even for 2 years. It would take longer than that to explain everything." 

I laughed. "Rod, she has that quote memorized. She said it to me last evening, word for word. When I had the opportunity, I repeated it back to her, and she was not happy about it. She said she was not used to people using her own words against her." 

Rod shook his head. "I can see over the next two years you two are going to battle back and forth; and get along famously." 

"I don't believe I have a choice, Mister Laver. He lives in a house that is 20 miles from nowhere. He has no neighbors, and his backyard is a national park. Either I talk to him, or I talk to the animals in the forest. Unlike Doctor Doolittle, I have not learned how to do that yet." 

"Delicious, after you listen to him for a long time, the animals will make more sense than he will." 

"Rod, I think you'd better go to the store and buy your 'Air Jordan's. If you keep talking about your only client like that, I am going to fire you." 

"Even, with all due respect, where are you going to find another attorney that will put up with all your foibles?" 

"For the amount of money I pay you every year, they will line up at the door." 

"Yes they will; and once they get their foot in that door, they will rob you blind." 

Delicious asked, "Are you sure you two are friends? If I heard this conversation in a restaurant, I would remove the silverware just to make sure you didn't kill each other." 

"Delicious, I have been yanking his balls since we were five years old. He is much smarter than I am, and I went to Harvard law school. He has no social skills. That's why he allows me to take care of everything from his pennies to his patents. If he didn't, he would be a brilliant high school science teacher, instead of one of the most prominent technical innovators in the world. He has forty-four patents, which makes him millions of dollars per month. He has two patents pending, and what he is working on now could change the satellite communications industry for the next 100 years. His mind is a marvel, but until he met you yesterday, the last time he had a real conversation with a woman was 18 years ago." 

****** 

As we left the hotel, Rod kept talking about the amount of food she ate for breakfast. When I told him what she had for dinner the evening before, he called me a liar. I continued telling him she ate half of my salmon also, and he was sure I was lying. I bet him $100 I could prove he was wrong. He accepted my bet. 

I produced the restaurant receipt and handed it to him. He looked at Delicious and asked her if she ate all of that food. She nodded and complained that I took a piece of broccoli from my plate after she started eating my salmon. 

Rod took $100 out of his wallet and handed it to me. 

"Thank you for paying for last nights' dinner, Rod. It's the first time you have had to pay for something out of your own expense account, since you graduated law school." 

"Don't worry about it Even, I'll figure way to get it back from you." 

*********** 

We had to wait 10 minutes for the department store to open. When we arrived in the shoe department, I told the young man what I wanted for Delicious. 

He looked at the clothes she was wearing, and then at her sneakers. I told him to throw them out, and bring one pair of shoes in everything he had in her size, and if we liked them, she would decide what colors she would take them in. He went to his register, called his manager, and asked for help. 

Two young women came into the department, and began bringing out shoes in every style. 

Delicious could not walk in the 5 inch spike heels, but I bought them for her anyhow, because of what they did for her legs. It was amazing; she went from a teenager, to a woman in an instant. They also brought her up to my height. She was gorgeous. 

90 minutes later, 24 pair of shoes, 9 pairs of sneakers, two pair of flip-flops, and $9220.00 later, and the 3 associates loaded the trunk of the car with all but one pair of shoes. Delicious was wearing those. 

Rod had no color left in his face. He nearly hyperventilated, when Delicious told him we had to go back into the store and buy sleepwear. 

"Even, I'm not used to this. You are spending money, and you are happy about it. I have never seen you like this before. Are you sure there's nothing wrong with you?" 

"I want you to remember the conversation we had when you called me about my parents' death. I told you I did not want to come here. You laughed at me and told me I had to come here to pick up my niece. This is your fault. If I had stayed at home, and you sent her to boarding school, as I wanted to, none of this would have happened. I am going to take this out of your salary, because you are the one that made me happy; Shame on you." 

"Even, you are so full of shit your eyes are turning brown." 

"My eyes are still blue, and until they turn brown, I am going to annoy you for making me and my niece happy at a time when we should be in mourning. Delicious, let's go buy you some nightgowns." 

"Even, can they be see-through?" 

"As long as you only wear them only when Rod comes to visit, it's okay with me." 

"When did you develop a mean streak Even?" 

"Looking through a sheer nightgown, at this magnificent child's body, is mean?" 

"It is more than mean. For any man with a working libido, and Victorian sexual attitudes, it represents A Clear and Present Danger, not only to his state of mind, but to her sexual status as well." 

****** 

It only took Delicious and an elderly woman 20 minutes to outfit her in nightgowns and pajamas. She did not have to go into the dressing room to try them on. The woman slipped the nightgowns over her head, and made sure they were a little snug to make up for the clothing she was wearing. After that it was all silk, satin, and size. The pajamas were for warmth. 

As we were walking out of the store, I realized we had not purchased stockings or socks for her. She had never worn stockings before, only tennis socks for her sneakers. We went to the counter and I told the woman that I wanted silk stockings for Delicious, and a few packages of tennis socks. 

The woman said, "Sir, she is a teenager; she will ruin these stockings quickly, and they are extremely expensive." 

I asked her who was paying for the stockings. 

"How many pair would you like to buy, sir?" 

"Let the young lady see what you have, and let her make the decision." 

The associate took out seven boxes of assorted colors of stockings, and placed them on the counter in front of Delicious. I whispered into Delicious' ear, "Take as many of each color you want." When she finished choosing, we had thirty-one pairs of stockings, and nine pair of tennis socks. 

She looked at me and asked if it was okay. I smiled at her and nodded my head. Another $1500 went on to my American Express card. I was sure Rod was going to have a coronary when he saw the next bill. 

I said to my favorite and only niece, "We have two choices. I can feed you again, which you seem to enjoy, or we can go to the funeral home. What would you like to do?" 

Her bright sunny face turned ashen, when she had to make that decision. Finally, she said, "I want to go to the funeral home first, please." 

We added our purchases to those already in the trunk. I got into the back seat with her, and I held her hand. I told her I would be by her side every moment. I would not let her go unless she wanted me to. 

************ 

The three of us walked into the funeral home together. Rod and I were holding her hands. Delicious noticed that two caskets were open, instead of one. She wanted to run to the front, because she knew her mother's casket was open. 

I held her back. 

"Baby, remember she is still gone. They did the best they could for her, because I wanted you to see her one more time. Don't expect miracles; remember what she looked like in life, and put that face upon her." 

We walked slowly up the center aisle, and slightly left towards Divines final resting place. Delicious' last few steps were very tentative. When we reached the kneeling rail in front of the casket, and she was able to see her mother, she cried out, "Isn't she beautiful, Uncle Even." 

I held her and said, "Your mother always was beautiful in my eyes. She was my best friend." 

"Why didn't you help her?" 

"She wouldn't let me. Every time we spoke to each other she was afraid if I gave her money your father would find out about it. I asked her to come live with me, but she was too proud to break up her marriage. She didn't want to admit she had failed, both as a wife, and a mother." 

"She didn't fail as a mother. She was wonderful to me." 

"Your mother was afraid of the one man that could harm you; your father. She feared that one night he would come home drunk, and rape you. That's why she spent so many hours with you at night, until he got home and fell into bed." 

"How often did you speak to my mom?" 

"I spoke to her at least once or twice a month, for the last 9 years." 

"She never said a word about it to me." 

"It was our little secret. If you knew, and blurted it out to your father accidentally, it would have caused a great many problems for your mother. He would tell her to ask me for money, and there would be no way I could refuse him for fear of what he might do to her or you." 

"So you weren't alienated from the family." 

"Yes I was. I never talked to my mother or father for over 10 years. They were impossible to deal with." 

"What caused the rift that broke you apart?" 

"My name was put up for a Nobel Prize in Science. I was the youngest person ever to be nominated for that prize. I was so excited I called to tell them. My dad said, "Call me when you win." 

"I didn't, and I didn't expect to win. He called to tell me I was a failure. I have almost $800 million in the bank, and he called me a failure. He was making $35 an hour as a supervisor in the paper mill, and he called me a failure. I have forty-four worldwide patents, and he called me a failure. He wanted me to follow in his footsteps at the paper mill, and he called me a failure. I could crush him with my wallet, and he called me a failure. You want to know why I never spoke to my parents again; it was because he had the nerve to call me a failure, because I did not win the Nobel Prize." 

"Your mother, on the other hand, had to call me from a payphone so your father would not see it on your telephone bill. She called me as soon as she heard I was nominated for the prize. She was so excited for me she couldn't contain herself. She was over the moon with happiness for me. She was my biggest fan, and my best friend. I would have done anything for her, but she wouldn't let me." 

'Delicious' cried as she understood why I had so little empathy for my parents, and so much love for my sister. She now knew that I didn't abandon her mother; the only woman I ever truly loved and she would not let me help her." 

'Delicious' said, "I know you are telling me the truth, because we promised each other we would never lie, regardless of how much it hurt us. What you just told me must have hurt you very much." 

"Rod is the only other person who knows that story. I told you I have no secrets from him." 

"Even, if I ever told you something, and asked you are not to tell anyone, would you tell Rod?" 

"Absolutely not; if you tell me something in confidence, it stays between you and me." 

"Doesn't that cause you an ethical problem with him?" 

"No; I don't tell him everything about my experiments, until they are completed, either." 

"Do we have to bury my mother with them?" 

"No. If you would like, we can have her buried in Colorado, close to my home." 

"Really, could you do that for me?" 

"No, but I could do that for us." 

She got up from the kneeling rail and hugged me so tightly she took my breath away. I knew at that moment this child was going to change my life forever. 

******** 

As we walked out of the funeral home I asked my niece, "Are you as smart as they say you are?" 

"I have you wrapped around my little finger already." 

Rod made believe he was coughing instead of laughing. 

I stared at him. "Mister former friend and attorney, would you make the necessary arrangements to have my sister's body forwarded to Idaho Springs. My niece and I will take the private jet home. You can fly coach." 

"Even, Delicious is correct. Not only does she have you wrapped around her little finger, but she has changed you already. We have not been here for a full 24 hours, and you have developed a sense of humor. I have known you for 28 years, and you have never been able to tell a joke or say something off-color. You have done both since we've been here. I wish I had seen you with your sister all these years. You would have been a totally different person. Delicious, you have your work cut out for you. Don't let up on him. I love what I see so far, and maybe, just maybe you will make a man out of him, instead of just a scientist." 

Rod earned a kiss for that statement, and he reveled in it. He looked at his client and said, "Even, I am going to get a divorce. When this child becomes of age, she is going to be mine." 

"My friend, Rosalynn and your 6 children may have something to say about that. I will tell her about this little encounter, and have her start putting all your money into an account with her and the children's names on it. I will pay for the best divorce lawyers in the country, and when they gets finished picking your pockets, no one will want you." 

"I knew you were developing a sense of humor." 

"You guys forgot one thing; you forgot to ask me about my thoughts on this subject." 

I looked at my niece and asked, "Would you marry a penniless, divorced man, who would leave his wife and 6 children behind?" 

"It wouldn't bother me as long as he truly and completely loved me; but why would I marry someone who is so damn ugly." 

I hurt myself when I walked into the car door laughing. Rod looked hurt when she said he was ugly, because he prided himself on his good looks. When Delicious and I saw the look on his face, we couldn't help ourselves; we burst out laughing, and held on to each other, until Rod joined in with us. 

He said, "Young woman, I will get you for that." 

******** 

We didn't stay for the burial services of my parents or Julius. I gave them as much respect in death, as they had given me in life. My friend and attorney made all of the arrangements, through a local attorney, to have 'Divine' brought to Idaho Springs as quickly as local and state laws could be conformed with. 

It was cute watching Delicious walk towards the aircraft. She would take a few steps towards the gleaming white Citation X and stop. I stopped behind her wondering what was going through her mind. She took a few more steps forward, then turned towards me and asked, "Can we take a bus please, Uncle Even?" 

"It would take us a week to get home, Niece Delicious." 

"I've never been on an airplane, so don't make a joke of it." 

"Delicious, you know all the equations and theories as to why an airplane flies; correct?" 

"Every 4th grader knows that answer Even." 

"I didn't hear an answer, so I guess you were third-grader." 

"You are just trying to get me on that tube with engines." 

"Maybe you are just a 2nd grader, because that tube with engines has wings and a tail." 

"Drag is overcome by thrust; and gravity is overcome by lift. Are you happy now?" 

"No I am not, because you didn't tell me how these things are compensated for?" 

"Even, I will be 17 next month. Can I buy a gun in Colorado when I am 17?" 

"Answer my question first, and then I will answer yours." 

"All four of these factors are compensated by acceleration." 

"NO." 

"What do you mean no? That is the correct answer and you know it. You promised you would never lie to me." 

"I didn't lie to you; I just answered your question." 

"What question?" 

"Can you legally buy a gun in Colorado at the age of 17." 

"How about an ax?" 

"Are you thinking about Lizzie Borden?" 

"I don't think I would need 40 whacks to get rid of you. My aim is better than hers." 

"I'm going to write you out of my will." 

"Big deal; I didn't know I was in it." 

"I had one relative I loved; your mother. She made sure her offspring, the one with the big mouth, was taken care of. Now are you going to get into the part of the aircraft that has seats, or am I going to have the crew tie you up, and put you in with the luggage?" 

Rod yelled, "Even, the pilot would like to know if we are leaving sometime today?" 

"Ask him if he would like to fly inverted all the way to Denver?" 

Delicious yelled, "I'll get in. I'll be good, just don't do that to me, please. I am frightened enough. Don't make this any harder on me than it already is." 

She turned and ran up the steps into the aircraft. The flight attendant took her by the hand and led her to a seat over the wing, and handed her a glass. 

"Mister Laver said you drink diet 7-Up, is that correct?" 

"Yes, thank you very much." 

Rod and I took our seats, and the door to the aircraft closed. The engines started and the aircraft began to taxi to the end of the runway. After hearing the safety instruction, I reached across the aisle and took Delicious' hand. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 01



"Finish your drink, the flight attendant will be by to pick up the glass in a second. We will turn onto the runway; you will hear the engines get very loud and then the brakes will release, and you will be pushed back into your seat. We will go down the runway about 3000 feet, the nose will lift up, and everything will become quiet. The landing gear will retract, and you will hear a thump as they lock in position. You will hear nothing but the sound of the engines until we descend into Denver. It is just that easy." 

"It's easy for you to say. I'm going to close my eyes and pray all the way there." 

"It's a shame; you are going to miss some beautiful scenery." 

They turned onto the runway and the engines began to roar. Delicious' hand squeezed mine so hard I thought she was going to break my fingers. Everything happened the way I said it would, and the tension in her hand eased. 

The aircraft leveled off at 2000 feet. I told Delicious to look out her window, because I ordered the pilot to do a tour around the outskirts of the city. It would be the last time she would ever see it. 

Mournfully she said, "I can see our house. Mom and I had some good times there." 

"All you have to do is close your eyes and think of those times; you will carry them with you forever and ever. No one can take them away from you. Will you miss anyone else?" 

She looked around the city below her, saw her high school, and shook her head. "Uncle Even, all I see is pain. I know I caused some of it by trying to keep the boys away from me. A lot of the girls were as bad as I was pretending to be, but they went out with those boys; I never did. They could have been nicer to me; but they never were." 

"Did you ever think they could see you were an angel in disguise, or that you were more beautiful than they were?" 

"I don't know what to think, but once you enter puberty, everything changes. You are either in the crowd or you are out. If you are out, you are marked person, and with a name like mine, your easy prey." 

"Would you two shut up, I can't think." 

I laughed. "This is a reversal of fortune for you isn't it Rod? On the way here you talked for 3 hours nonstop. We've been in the air 20 minutes and you are complaining about us talking. How inconsiderate of us." 

"We took a 17 hour trip to Australia, Even. You said fewer words on that trip than you did on this trip so far. Your tongue is going to develop cramps, because it has never been used this much." 

"I didn't know the tongue could develop cramps." 

"Delicious, the tongue is a muscle, and like all muscles, it can develop a cramp." 

"I'm cold. Does it always get chilly inside an airplane?" 

"If you think it's chilly in here, why don't you step outside?" 

"You go first, Even; I'll follow you." 

I hit a button, and asked for a blanket and pillow for Delicious. Ten minutes later she was unconscious. 

"How much did you give her Rod?" 

"A little more than would put a fly to sleep. I would bet she has never taken a drug in her life, the way she reacted to a milligram of Valium." 

"I would have bet on it, knowing my sister, and her attitude towards drugs. However, it was easier than asking Delicious to pee in a bottle." 

******** 

2 hours later, over the Great Plains of the United States, she woke up, and she was not very happy. 

"Which one of you did this to me? I don't take naps during the middle of the day." 

I offered, "You have never been in an airplane before either. Your body might be getting used to it, or not." 

"Uncle Even tell me the truth." 

I pointed it Rod and said, "He did it." 

Defensively, Rod said, "He told me to do it." 

Delicious looked at the both of us and shook her head. "One of you will lie, and the other one will swear to it." 

I protested. "I am not lying. I told you I would never lie to you and I am not. Rod gave you less than 1 mg of Valium to make this flight easier on you, because you were so nervous." 

"Rod, I could have your license pulled for doing something as stupid as that. Don't you know you're not allowed to dispense drugs to someone other than the person it was prescribed for?" 

"Even, why didn't I listen to you and keep you at home. She is impossible. She is going to drive both of us insane. I thought I did something nice for her and she is going to have my license pulled. First she tells me I'm ugly, and then she's going to put me out of work; what's next?" 

I sat back in my chair and smiled. "I don't know my friend, but I'm enjoying the hell out of it." 

"Et tu Brute'?" 

"Consider it partial payback for all the nasty things you have been saying to me these past ten years, while I have been making you rich." 

"I am not as rich as you are, but I thank you, my wife thanks you, and each of my 6 children thank you." 

Delicious said, "I realize you must have a lot of time on your hands, because Even does not keep you that busy every day of the week 365 days a year. However, don't you think you should give your poor wife a break in between babies?" 

I laughed and applauded my niece's bluntly put statement. 

"Counselor do you have a reply to that query?" 

"Yes I do, Even. Can I help it if fell madly in love, and married a devout Roman Catholic woman, who is sexy as hell, and horny all the time? Once her Ova realize we are having intercourse, they start doing calisthenics, and get ready for the big moment. When her vagina yells 'BLASTOFF', instead of the eggs waiting calmly for the sperm to reach them Rosalynn's Ova are like crazed linebackers. They seek out the oncoming horde of sperm and attack them in force. They kill off all the losers, and carry the winner back on their shoulders and implant her in the lining of the uterus and watch as she begins a new life cycle." 

Delicious retorted, "Rod, you could tell that as a bedtime story to your children, or sell it as a Dr. Seuss story. It was really awesome. In real life however, why don't you get yourself snipped, and prevent all this drama." 

Rod grabbed his crotch and said, "Who Me?" 

"Yes you asshole." 

"Delicious, watch your mouth." 

"Uncle Even, I just said..." 

"How long do you need to be grounded for me to get my message across to you?" 

"I just received a news flash at my message center Uncle Even, can we discuss this later?" 

"Niece Delicious, it will be a very short discussion, and you will lose." 

"Mommy, I need help." 

"No Delicious, you need to change your vocabulary quickly." 

Don't you think your wife has given you enough children, and gone through enough pain and suffering for one lifetime. She will not break her vows to her religion, and you will not have to worry about spreading your seed to anyone else. For a few days of discomfort, and wearing an ice pack as a jockstrap, you could give your wife all the sex she wants, without the fear of getting pregnant again." 

"You open the door Even, I'll throw her out. She is not only going to drive you into a new life, but she is going to take me along with you. I am not sure I am going to like this one bit." 

"I will repeat what I said to you before. I wanted to stay home. You told me I had to go. I wanted to put her into a boarding school. You laughed at me. This is your fault. You are going to have to live with the consequences just as I am. I am enjoying this much more than I thought I would, because of the look on your face." 

"I'm going to make sure you get audited by the IRS every year from now on." 

"That's fine with me. Whose name is next to mine with all those fancy letters and titles showing how smart he is. Who will have to defend every item he put down on the paper? If I remember correctly, I don't have to be there." 

"Uncle Even, if he doesn't do your taxes correctly, I can do them for you. It's a piece of cake." 

Rod laughed. "You wouldn't know where to begin with his taxes." 

"Mister Laver, I'll bet you my only $100 that I do know where to begin." 

"Miss Delicious Mark I accept your bet." 

"Mister Laver on the top left hand side of the first page, you put your clients name; last name first, first name, and middle initial. May I have my $100 now please?" 

Rod looked at her in astonishment. He walked right into a trap, with his eyes wide open. He handed her a $100 bill and said, "Why do I have a feeling this is not the last time I'm going to be handing you money?" 

"You should couch your questions in a more closed end manner, as you would if you were going to court. If you leave yourself open, as you did with that question, I will be taking money from you, like I would take candy from a baby." 

"Even, I don't like her." 

"We graduated from the University of Massachusetts in 2 ½ years together. You went to Harvard, I went to MIT. Are you going to let a 16-year-old girl intimidate you? Man, what has happened to your balls?" 

"She just had them snipped, remember." 

"Snipped yes, but not removed, and it hasn't happened yet." 

Delicious asked, "Can I use your telephone, please. I would love to talk to Rosalynn, and tell her about this conversation." 

I was handing her my phone, when Rod's snatched it out of my hand. 

"Delicious, you will never talk to my wife; you will never meet my wife, and you will never know where I live. My life will not be worth two cents if you two get together and talk about Even and me." 

"Two cents; that leaves a penny of wiggle room. It could be fun." 

The flight attendant walked down the aisle and said, "We are beginning our descent into Denver. Would you please buckle your seatbelts?" 

Delicious was astonished. She said, "We are here already?" 

I said, "No, we are about 300 miles east of the airport. We will be on the ground in about thirty-five minutes." 

"That is still very quick considering how far we have come. It is definitely quicker than the bus, or train. Does it really take a lot of time to get used to living mile above sea level?" 

"Yes it does. The air is thinner, so there's not as much oxygen in it as there is at sea level. It takes a little while for your body to get used to it. We live in Idaho Springs, which is twice as high as Denver: 11,483 feet, or just a little bit more than 2 miles above sea level. It will take you 3 times longer to get used to it. If you walked a mile in 10 minutes at home, it would take you 30 minutes to walk it had my home. You would feel like the weight of the world was on your back when you walk in the front door. 

There are many things about my property that I love, and after a long walk, or hike through the forest I can go to my natural hot spring, and relax, so my muscles don't cramp. In the winter I use that water to heat the house. It's close enough that you can walk there, but in the winter, I take my snowmobile because it's easier." 

"You have a snowmobile?" 

"Every self-respecting Coloradan has a snowmobile. How else would we get to the mail box, during the winter?" 

"Can I have one?" 

"No." 

"Why not?" 

"You are a Maine-iac!" 

"Very funny Even; do I get a snowmobile or what?" 

"You get a snowmobile after you get your drivers' license." 

"How can I get a drivers' license if I don't have a car?" 

"You can use mine." 

Rod said, "I would put my worst enemy in that car." 

"It has new brakes; new tires and it just had a tune-up. What's wrong with my car?" 

"The transmission sucks, the engine bounces all over the place, because you never got the mounts replaced, and one more good bounce and your driveshaft will drop out. Is there anything else you'd like to know?" 

"Why didn't they tell me that when I brought in for the tires?" 

"Because you go in there and tell them exactly what you want done to your car; nothing more and nothing less. If you asked them to inspect the car and tell you what's wrong with it, they would give you a laundry list of things that need to be taken care of. However that is not the way you work. These last few days I have seen you spend your money the way you should. There is no sense dying with nine figures in your bank account for someone else to enjoy." 

Delicious choked. "Nine figures, you are that rich?" 

"No, he forgot the decimal point with two more zeroes." 

"Uncle Even, you promised not to lie to me." 

"I didn't lie, you didn't listen. 

"Alright, can we go over this one more time?" 

"No." 

"EVEN!" 

"DELICIOUS!" 

"Mister Laver, would you buy me a gun please? If you do I'll never talk to your wife." 

"Tempting; very, very tempting; but I would lose my only source of income." 

"Didn't you make out his will?" 

"No he wouldn't let me. It was the one item he farmed out to another firm. I was furious with him, but he said it was for his own good. He didn't want me to know if I was named in the will or not, just in case I killed him." 

Delicious said, "Good move, Even; where do you keep your will?" 

"It's in a double sealed envelope in his office. If either seal is broken, that Will is null and void. There is another one filed with the attorneys that drew the up my Will. All my money will go to charity, except the money I put aside for your mother, which automatically reverts to you." 

Rod grumbled. "So you had a mean streak before you went to Waterville." 

"Rod, you are my best and only friend. I gave you the master copy of my Will, because I trust you implicitly, and wanted to drive you crazy at the same time. Every time you open your safe you see that manila envelope, and want to see what's in there. I know you will never open it, but I enjoy the thought of you looking at it and grimacing." 

"I can tell you two are related. In your own ways, you are both evil." 

Delicious said, "Mister Laver, I have a solution to your problem. Why don't you take that envelope, and put it in a safety deposit box in a bank. You will never have to look at it again, and the temptation to open it will be gone." 

"I hate 16-year-old girls. I never thought about that. I will do that first thing Monday morning." Rod reached into his wallet and gave Delicious another $100. 

"Delicious, I think I'm going to put you on retainer. It's going to be cheaper for me that way. I'm going to arrange for you to take the GED and get you out of high school and into college. Once that is done, I am going to arrange for you to CLEP as many courses as they will let you, and get you out of college in less than two years. Then we will decide on your future; whether it is: the law, science, engineering, technology, computers, or wherever your talents lie." 

Delicious looked at Rod and me, and asked, "Do I have any say in this matter?" 

Rod and I said in chorus, "NO!" 

"I can feel you two tightening the noose around my neck already. What happened to homeschooling?" 

"You are going to be doing a lot of this at home, and if you're not happy we have one other option for you." 

"Should I bother asking what it is?" 

I smiled at my lovely niece and before I could say it, she did: 

"The Air Force Academy. I'm beginning not to like either of you. I have $300; I could probably buy a gun on the black market and off you with it, Even. I could claim loneliness, depressive neurosis over the loss of my parents and grandparents, and most depressing of all, 'Living with a Dork." 

I looked at my attorney and asked, "Are you taping all of this, Rod?" 

"Taping all of what, Even? If you are dead, I get to open that envelope." 

"I can see the two of you are forming a conspiracy against me. I'm going to have to watch my back at all hours of the day and night." 

"Uncle Even, if you give me the patent on the Satellite Telecommunications Linkup when you're finished with it, I promise to be good. You'll never have to worry about your back from me ever again." 

"Do you see what you've done to my niece, Rod? She has never stolen anything in her life. After the few hours she has been cooped up with you, she wants to steal three years of my work. You are a bad influence on an impressionable child. No, Delicious, you cannot have my Patent, unless you work on it with me." 

Delicious grinned. "He doesn't know how to deal with women, does he? I got everything I wanted, and all I had to do was ask him for it." 

"Even, she does not fight fair. You never see her coming, and before you know it, you have given up the crown jewels, plus your own jewels as well." 

Even replied, "I'm going to tell Rosalynn you volunteered to get snipped so she wouldn't have to bare any more children. You don't want her to go through any more pregnancies, like the last five, because they are unfair to her. You are going to man up and get your balls cut off." 

"You wouldn't do that to me." 

"You can stand by the phone and listen while I do it." 

"What's gotten into you, Even?" 

"You sent me to Waterville Maine." 

"I'm so sorry; I didn't know what I was doing. 

"I told Delicious I would never lie to her. Now I have to give her the Patent on the EXOSensor." 

"You've tested it already?" 

"Of course I've tested it. It's not ready yet, but its damn close. Three years of my work, and it's going to belong to a high school student." 

The pilot came on the intercom and said, "Prepare for landing." 

I reached out and took Delicious' hand in mine. "You are going to hear a bump as the landing gear comes down, and a high-pitched whine has the flaps go down. When the tires touch the ground, it's just like driving on an unfinished road for a few seconds, and then it smooth's out. You will hear a loud noise which will be the engine thrust being diverted to slow us down. Then we will taxi to the terminal. Our flight is over; it is as easy as that." 

"You're not angry with me?" 

"What have you done to get the angry with you?" 

"I joked that I was going to steal your Patent." 

"Did you know you were joking?" 

"Of course, I did. I wanted to see how you would react." 

"How did I react?" 

"You blamed to Rod for taking you to Maine." 

"How did Rod react?" 

"He said he had not made a mistake like that since he was school." 

"Did anyone accuse you of doing anything wrong or yell at you?" 

"No, and I don't understand why? I was the one doing the stealing." 

"Were you really stealing; or did people know you were pulling their chain, and got even with you by letting you wonder what was happening by blaming someone else or themselves?" 

Delicious looked at Rod, who was grinning at her. She looked at me and said, "You two are evil. You took advantage of a naïve sixteen-year-old girl. That's not fair, and furthermore it was not nice." 

Rod said, "I told you I would get even for that 'ugly' remark." 

Delicious replied, "I will find out your home phone number and talk to your wife." 

"I don't have a landline to my home, we only use cell phones." 

"That's not fair. There's no phone book for cell phone numbers." 

Rod smiled, "I feel really awful about that, I really do." 

"I guess I'll just have Uncle Even tell Rosalynn that I have volunteered to babysit your children, so you two can get a well-deserved night out." 

"I told you before Delicious, you are not going to meet my wife, you are not going to speak to my wife, and you are not going to know where I live." 

"Mister Laver would you like to lose another $100?" 

"What are we betting on now?" 

"Even, do I have access to a computer or to a library with computers in it?" 

"Absolutely, how do you think you're going to be doing your homework?" 

"Mister Laver, I bet you within thirty minutes of my getting home to Uncle Evens house, I know everything there is to know about your home. its address its square footage its lot size and everything else pertinent to it." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 01



"No miss smarty-pants, I am not going to lose another hundred dollars to you. You are going to go into the county records, pull-up my name and download everything about my home." 

"Rod, we have to start building a fence around her, I think she's dangerous to our way of life." 

"We could always electrify yours, and make it taller." 

"You don't think my 10 foot tall fence is high enough?" 

Delicious cocked her head and looked at me. "Where do you live, in a prison?" 

I said, "My computer cost $18 million, and what I have saved on it now is priceless. The test equipment that is in the basement, joined conjoined with this the computer, cost an additional $12.5 million. All of it is insured, but as they used to say in the old west, "Good Fences, Make Good Neighbors." 

Delicious laughed. "You don't have any neighbors." 

"And my insurance woman is very happy about it." 

"How liberal of you Uncle Even, you have a woman as an insurance agent. Do you know her? Did you actually meet her about your insurance needs, or did Rod do it for you?" 

"Nice Delicious, how do you think I handled it?" 

"Even, I think when she entered your house; you were deep in the woods." 

"You are incorrect. I was tubing down a 13,500 foot mountain." 

"You are doing what; where? 

"Delicious, we do have several enjoyable recreational activities, when there is snow on the ground here. We ski, use our snowmobiles, go tubing, sit in our hot natural springs, go ice fishing, ice skating, and many other wonderful things that people who live in the North Eastern United States have little or no knowledge of. That day, I rented a tube, eight-foot in diameter, and went freefalling down the side of the mountain. The tube is covered by strong netting so you cannot fall through it. You hook it up to a cable and it takes you to the top of the mountain. You wait your turn, until the guide tells you to go. Once you start down, you can't stop because there are no breaks. You careen down the mountain, at about 40 miles an hour, downhill about 3000 feet until you crash into the polystyrene blocks and netting that stop you. It is a ride you will never forget. You can rent the tube by the hour, four hours, or by the day. The mountain does not close until 10 PM. It is a blast." 

"You actually go out and have fun, Even?" 

"I have to do something to clear the cobwebs from my brain, when I can't solve a problem. Having fun helps me." 

Delicious smiled at Rod and as "Is that why you have sex and get your wife pregnant so often?" 

"Don't you start with me Delicious. I'll take you over my knee and spank you." 

"Uncle Even I am surprised Rod is still in your attorney. Apparently he has never heard the term 'Child Abuse.' We read about it all the time on the East Coast. Hasn't it reached this far West yet?" 

Rod said, "Delicious, I am going to buy you that gun. However, I am going to use it on you first." 

"There he goes again Even: 'Premeditated Murder.' I think I will choose law school, because you are going to need a new attorney very shortly." 

"Even, why didn't you force your sister to move out here so we had time to get used to Delicious. She is culture shock to the maximum degree. My children are not like her. If they meet her, and change into her, I will be put into a sanitarium, for the rest of my days." 

"My friend I believe you had better take her up on her suggestion immediately, and get yourself snipped. If you have any more children, and she has the same effect on them as she will have on your current mob, both you and your lovely wife may want to run away from home." 

"I agree. I will take care of it next week. I don't wish to take any chances of getting Rosalynn pregnant again, while this she-devil is amongst us." 

"My mother did not raise a she-devil. I am a very nice person; different in some ways, but very nice nonetheless." 

I said to my darling niece, "You can bet your ass your different." 

She laughed. "Are you sure that's the only part you want me to bet Uncle Even. I saw the way you diverted your eyes when I came out of the bedroom last night wrapped only in a towel." 

"It was the proper thing for a gentleman to do; considering you were hanging out every place else. As far as your betting is concerned, if you show anything else, consider yourself grounded, and then in uniform for four years." 

"You are no fun at all Even." 

"I am not supposed to be fun. I am your guardian. I take that job very seriously." 

Delicious walked over to me, wrapped her arms around my chest, and hugged me tight. "Thank you Even. It is something mom would have said to me if I crossed a moral line, and she disapproved. Sometimes I push just to see how far the envelope will go before it tears. She would have slapped my hands if I pushed that far with her. Then we would laugh, because we both knew I was testing her limits." 

"Are you going to try to be impossible all the time?" 

"No, I am going to try to learn all the time I am with you. That is why I spent so much time with mom. She homeschooled me. I purposely didn't do well on my report cards to make them think I was an idiot. I couldn't fool the IQ test, because of the way they kept changing the wording of the same questions, over and over again. That test is very sneaky, and after a while you just give in and start answering the questions correctly. The guidance counselors were amazed when they saw my raw test scores, so they tested me again. My score came out higher the second time. They weren't sure what to do with me." 

"I know what I'm going to do with you. I'm going to electrify that fence. It won't be to keep everyone out, it will be to keep you in. I can't imagine the damage you would do to the people of Idaho Springs if you go there on your own." 

"Even, I'm not all that bad." 

"Neither is an earthquake in Japan, if you are living in Colorado, Delicious." 

"Are you ever going to trust me?" 

"Trust has to be earned. We will take this one-step at a time, and see how it goes." 

"You realize that goes both ways, don't you?" 

"I wouldn't have it any other way. If you trusted me completely at this moment, you would have to be a fool. I have already found out that you are no one's fool." 

"You aren't either, Even." She giggled, "I'm not sure about Rod though?" 

"Hey, how did I wind up on the short end of this conversation?" 

"You have two strikes against you, Mister Laver. One more strike and you're out. Child Abuse, and Premeditated Murder. I could add the threat of Tax Fraud, but I will let you slide this time, because Even ridiculed you before I did, and I already took my $100." 

"Even, I am positive that I do not like your niece." 

"Rod, I am going to call Rosalynn, and tell her that Delicious has volunteered to babysit your clan so you two can go away for the weekend together." 

Delicious turned her head swiftly, "I said an evening, Even." 

"A weekend will be good practice for you." 

"You are lying to me, Uncle Even." 

"I am not lying to you, Niece Delicious; it will be great practice for you." 

"Uncle Even, prior to this point I said I was beginning not to like you. At this point, I am almost sure I do not like you." 

I smiled at the lovely image of my sister. "Delicious, I used to torment Divine by setting up babysitting jobs for her with people who had multiple children, instead of just one. Why do you think she was so successful raising you?" 

"Are you accusing me of having multiple personalities?" 

"If the shoe fits, and we have multiple pairs of shoes for you to try on, wear it." 

Rod cheered. "Score one for my client. It's a clear knocked down." 

Delicious glared at him. "Mister Laver, if you would like to save some money, I could perform the operation for you free of charge." 

I laughed as Rod placed both hands over his package, and fled towards the aircraft's exit. 

I said to my niece, "I have never seen that man be afraid of anyone. He's been cooped up in an aircraft with you for a few hours, and he runs away like a thief in the night." 

She took my arm as we headed out the aircraft and said, "I do have that effect on younger men, Even. When we get to your home, we can talk about it." 

"It is no longer my home, Delicious. It is our home for the rest of our lives, if you would like. I am going to put your name on the title?" 

"Thank you Even, it's wonderful to know I will always have a place to call home." 

3. SURPRISE 

As Rod exited the aircraft, he looked down the steps and his worst fears were realized. Rosalynn and his six children were waiting to greet him. He had no way to keep his wife, children, and Delicious from meeting. His human life was officially over, and his life in hell was about to begin. 

He greeted Rosalynn, with a deep, passionate kiss, which was difficult, because she had one baby in her arms, one in a stroller, and four children dancing around him. 

Rod looked up the stairway and saw Delicious wearing an evil smile. He closed his eyes and said quietly, "Please God, strike me dead now." 

Rosalynn smacked him. "Rod, what's wrong with you?" 

He pointed towards Delicious and said, "She is." 

Delicious walked over to Mrs. Laver, relieved her of the child in her arms, said hello, and introduced herself. 

"Hello Mrs. Laver, I am Even's niece; Delicious Mark. My mother, Divine, was his sister. I told your husband I would love to take care of your children, any weekend of your choosing, so you and your husband could get away, by yourselves. Uncle Even said you needed to take a break from all the hassle you face every day with your six children." 

Rosalynn was taken aback by this greeting. "What does anyone say to a greeting like that Delicious. I'm quite taken back by it. When my husband left for Maine, all he could talk about was how funny it was going to be to watch Even deal with a sixteen-year-old female. You walk off the airplane, my husband sees you, and he wants God to kill him. What happened in the last twenty-four hours that my husband turned into a wuss?" 

"May I call you Rosalynn?" 

"Of course you may, Delicious, because the stories you are going to tell me have got to be good ones." 

"Why don't we give the children to Rod and my uncle, and let me take you to lunch on the $200 he lost to me on the airplane." 

Rosalynn turned to Rod. "How did you lose $200 to a sixteen-year-old girl, on a four hour trip in an airplane?" 

"It was very easy." 

"I want a better answer than that." 

"I threatened Even to have his taxes audited, because he made me angry. Delicious said, "Uncle Even, if he doesn't do your taxes right; I will, they are a piece of cake." I said, she wouldn't know where to start on his taxes. That's where she got me. As easy as pie she said, "On the top left hand side of the first page you put your clients' name: last name, first name, middle initial. May I have my $100 please. I wanted to kill her, but she had me dead to rights. I took $100 from my wallet and she grabbed it out of my hand. 

She got the second $100 by telling me how not to look at Evens Will every time I opened the vault in the office. I never thought about it before, but it made so much sense I should have kicked myself for not thinking about it before. She told me to rent a safety deposit box at a bank, so I would never have to look at it again. I reached into my wallet and gave her another $100. I told her I was going to put her on retainer, because it would be cheaper for me in the long run, because I felt this was not going to be the last time I was going to be handing her money." 

Rosalynn laughed hysterically. "Rod, you have the children for the rest of the day. Delicious and I are going out to get acquainted. She has gotten more money out of you in four hours then I get out of you in a week. I am going to start taking lessons from her." 

Delicious said, "I'm sorry Rosalynn, I forgot, we can't do that. Rod said that I was not allowed to meet you. I am not allowed to talk to you. I am not allowed to know where you live; and I am not allowed to know your phone number. He's afraid I may be a bad influence on you, and on your children. However, he has decided to do one thing for you, which I think is very commendable. He is going to have a Vasectomy, next week, because he doesn't want you to go through the pains of childbirth again. I think that is the nicest thing a husband can do for wife, who was already given and six children." 

Rosalynn turned and looked at her husband. "Really Rod, you are going to do that for me? You don't know how long I've wished for you to do that. I dreaded the next pregnancy, but you know I would never have done anything to stop it." 

Even had to walk away from this conversation, because he didn't want to start laughing at the look on his attorneys face. Rod had stopped breathing, while Delicious was still telling Rosalynn about his decision about the Vasectomy, and was starting to turn blue. If his wife was not holding him so closely, she would've thought he was dying. 

The smile Delicious was giving him did not help the situation either. 

Rod said, "Yes, my love, I am going to schedule it for next week. We will make plans to go away after I recover from the operation. Maybe Delicious would allow us to go away for a week?" 

Even said, "Of course she would let you go for a few more days. She is so used to babysitting for multiple children households, it will be no problem for her; isn't that right dear?" 

Delicious grinned, "There would be no problem at all, Uncle Even, as long as you buy me that little woodworking kit we were discussing on the aircraft. You remember the one with the little axe included?" 

"Yes, I remember it well. We will pick it up while Rod is in the hospital." 

"Oh great, maybe I could whittle, on his whittle thing?" 

"I'm not sure if he would appreciate that, but we will see. Aren't you and Rosalynn supposed to go to lunch now?" 

"How am I supposed to get home? I don't even know your address?" 

"Rosalynn will bring you home. Rod and Rosalynn are my next-door neighbors." 

"You don't have any neighbors." 

"I don't have any neighbors on my side of the street, but I do have neighbors across the street." 

"Uncle Even, I think you lied to me." 

"Niece Delicious, if you only think I lied to you, it means I told the truth." 

"Uncle Even, I believe you are splitting hairs." 

"Niece Delicious, thank you for mentioning that. Rosalynn, do you have a little time this afternoon, because I have a favor to ask of you?" 

"I have all the time in the world, Even. My darling husband is taking care of the children. What would you like me to do for you?" 

"After this gorgeous child scares you by eating half the restaurant menu, would you take your to your salon, and have them do something with her hair. I was going to take care of it while we were in Waterville, but I never got to it. She is to stay as close to her natural color as she is, and nothing wild to her hair. However, her bangs go in three separate directions, and she looks like a sheepdog." 

"Uncle Even, I am going to hit you." 

"Niece Delicious, I am going to hit you back." 

"Uncle Even that's not fair. I didn't insult you." 

"Niece Delicious, I didn't insult you either; I am insulted your hair." 

"One evening you are going to go to sleep with hair Uncle Even, and the next morning you are going to wake up without any." 

"Carpe diem, Niece Delicious; just remember you have to sleep also. Bald men are acceptable, but not so with bald women." 

Rosalynn asked her husband, "Rod, when did Even learn to talk to a woman?" 

"Babe, when the children are not around I will tell you about his first conversation with Delicious. I will make sure that you were sitting on the commode when I tell you; otherwise you will pee your pants." 

"Is it that funny?" 

"It is not only funny, but in one conversation he broke three of his own taboos." 

"Delicious, you come with me. We have a lot of girl talking to do. Any woman that can get Even to talk has got to be someone very special. Rod, you take the motor coach with Even and the kids. We will use a taxi around town, and a car service to bring us home." 

As Rosalynn was putting the children into their car seats, Rod went over to Delicious and said, "A gun is too good for you. There is an ancient Indian method I'm going to use on you. I'm going to tie you up high in the mountains, and drip blood all around the area to bring carnivores towards you. When they arrive, they will tear you apart limb from limb, while you are screaming for mercy. No one will hear you, and I will smile when I read the police report." 

"That is number three, Rod. Child abuse, premeditated murder, and now kidnapping, with intent to kill. Two capital crimes, plus twenty years. It is definitely law school for me. Uncle Even is going to need a new attorney very soon, unless of course you want to give me $300 now, before I tell your wife." 

"You would not do that to me." 

"We are going out to lunch, and your wife wants to talk. It's bound to come up in conversation." 

"You are as beautiful as you are dangerous, Delicious." 

"Thank you Rod, did you know you're getting gray hair?" 

"What! Where, I didn't see any...I am not talking to you anymore. You are going to cause me a heart attack. I'm going to have my balls snipped because of you, and now you tell me I had a gray hair, where there was none. I hope you enjoy babysitting for our children, because they are an integral part of my torture plan for you." 

"Rod, they will be angels for Rosalynn when you get home. However, as soon as you walk in the door, there is going to be a breakdown of civil society as they attack you, and want your individual attention. You will not get one seconds rest, until they go to bed for the night." 

"You are not that good, Delicious." 

"How much would you like to wager, Rod?" 

"How much money do you have?" 

"After you give me my $300, I will have a total of $500. I will wager $400 that I can accomplish this in one week, and Rosalynn can be the judge." 

"I told you I should have put you on a retainer," as he handed her $300. "Why did I just give you this money again?" 

"You didn't want your wife and I to have a particular discussion about child abuse, premeditated murder, kidnapping with the intent to commit murder, and other vile actions by an officer of the court." 

"You would never have done that, would you?" 

"Of course not, it was all bogus anyhow." 

"I want my money back." 

"What money are you talking about?" 

"My $300, I want it back." 

"It seems to have disappeared." 

"It's in your bra." 

"Are you sure?" 

"Yes, I saw you put it there." 

Delicious yelled, "Rosalynn, watch this." 

"Go ahead Rod, take your $300 out." 

Rod looked at his wife, looked at the evil glint in Delicious' eyes, shook his head, and walked away. Halfway between the two women he said, "God Help All Men." 

Delicious giggled. 

Rosalynn lifted her shoulders and arms wondering what was supposed to happen. 

Delicious yelled, "Your husband chickened out." 

Even walked up behind her and said, "I wish he had stuck his hand in there and pulled out his money. I would have, and I would have squeezed your nipple until you scream. Don't you ever do anything like that again, do you understand me, missy?" 

"Yes, Uncle Even, I'm sorry." 

"No you are not; not yet anyway. Go over to Rod, and apologize to him this instant. Give him $500 in restitution for your misdeeds. We will discuss this when you get home tonight." 

"Yes, Uncle Even." 

I watched her as she walked over to my friend, with her head bowed down. She looked contrite as she handed him all of her money. Rod looked at me and I nodded my head, so he took it. He kissed her on the head, hugged her, and sent her back to me. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 02



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it notated now, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be a few and far between. This is going to be a "SHORT STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.'

Chapter 2

4. The Domino Effect

Saturday morning, Rod was angry, and he was never angry. Rosalynn walked around the house ignoring him. She sent the three oldest boys, 7, 6, and 6 years old, to play at their friends' house next-door, while she tended to the three children at home. She knew why he was angry, but she let him stew in his displeasure, instead of coddling him. If she said that word out loud now, he would explode. She decided to wait until she sat down to her breakfast to light his fuse.

Finally, their youngest boy settled down for his morning nap. Their two girls were romping around the playroom, and Roz was finally able to sit down to have her coffee and Greek yogurt. She purposely kept her chair away from the table so she could duck just in case he threw anything at her. Then, she did it.

"Thisis absolutely DELICIOUS!"

Rods' mouthful full of coffee flew all over his morning paper. With daggers in his eyes he looked at his wife, who was innocently eating her yogurt, and asked, "What did you just say?"

"My yogurt; it is absolutely DELICIOUS."

"You are saying that on purpose."

Looking confused, she asked, "Would you like to taste some?"

"You know what I'm talking about Roz. Don't ever say that word again."

"What word Rod, DELICIOUS?"

"You just said again. You are trying to piss me off."

"Rod, are you telling me that a sixteen-year-old girl has gotten under your skin so badly, that you can't stand the sound of her name?"

"She is no ordinary sixteen-year-old girl. She is the spawn of the devil, and I want you to have no dealings with her."

"Are you trying to tell me who I can associate with, because if you are, you might as well throw those condoms you wore this weekend away, because you will never get laid again."

"Do you see what I mean Rosalynn? She has turned you against me."

"She has done nothing of the kind. That young woman has offered to take our children for one full week so I could have a real vacation for the first time since we got married. I have always been pregnant, or had a child in my arms and been pregnant at the same time, thanks to you. Finally, I have someone who is willing to watch all six of my children at one time, while I'm not pregnant, and you do not want me to associate with her. What kind of husband are you? You were with that girl for less than one full day. You lose $300 to her, and make an idiotic mistake on a tax question. I was with her for five hours, and she was as pleasant as any young woman I have ever been with. We went to a salon and talked while we had our hair done. We went to buy her casual clothing, because all she had been wearing were the dressy clothes 'Even' purchased for her in Maine. All during that time she was a perfect young woman. She comported herself beautifully, and unlike you, she listened to every word I said. She asked me questions about what I talked about, so I knew she was paying attention. She is as smart as anyone I know, including you, and possibly Even."

"Do you see what I mean, Roz; she is playing you against me. She 'is' as smart as anyone you have ever met in your life."

"Rod, you are just angry that she took money from you, and she beat you on that tax question."

"I will admit that hurt, but there was another one she got me on, that hurt more. When we first saw her, in the funeral home, she was in a see-through blouse that showed her young breasts, and a miniskirt that barely covered anything. I will tell you what went on between Even and Delicious, when you are sitting on the commode, because I don't want you to have an accident in your pants. However, the next morning she was a totally different person. Even took her shopping, before they went to dinner, and she looked stunning. After some comments; she kissed me to thank me for the things I said about her. I told Even when she came of age, I was going to divorce my wife, leave my six children, and marry her. Even gave me a lecture about everything he was going to do to me, but the funny part was what Delicious said. "... leaving my family wouldn't bother her, as long as I truly loved her; but why would she marry someone who is so damn ugly."

Rosalynn laughed so loud her two little girls, came running from the playroom wondering why she was laughing. Rosalynn told them that daddy told a joke, and mommy thought it was very funny.

When the children left, Rod continued his story. "That wasn't the end of it either; she kept taunting me. I nearly had a stroke when she looked at my head and told me I had gray hairs. I bought it. I grabbed my head as if I could feel the difference between my dark black hair, and the gray ones. I realized I had been had, when she began to smile at me. I wanted to kill that child. I summoned up the courage to smile back at her. I said, "Don't worry about a thing little girl. My time will come, and I will get you for that remark."

Rosalynn had a gnawing feeling in her gut. She had to know if she was right, or not. "Rod, tell me the truth. I need to know whose idea it was for you to have the vasectomy."

Rod dropped his head. "Oh God, you are going to kill me."

She was so pissed, steam poured out of her ears. "You prick, that's what I thought. Don't come to bed tonight. Sleep with one of the children; sleep in your office, or sleep in the den. Sleep anywhere but near me. If you do, you may not wake up in the morning." She got up from the table, threw her spoon at him, and left the room.

"Rosalynn; Rosalynn you have to forgive me. I'm going to have it done. Does it matter whose idea it was?"

She yelled down the stairs, "You bet your ass it does."

He scolded himself, "I should never have let 'Even' go to Maine."

He picked up his cell phone and called him. As the phone was ringing, he realized the time, and knew Even would still be asleep. He was about to hang up, when 'SHE' said, "Good morning Rod; how may I help you?"

"Meet me out front, I'm going to take you to the top of Stark Mountain, tie you up, and leave you there for the wolves."

"Oh, poor Rod; are we having a bad day. Did you say something nasty to your wife this morning? Did your children keep you up all night? I thought that was Rosalynn's job. You wouldn't get out of bed, in the middle of the night, to help her with the children. Am I correct, you poor, poor man?"

"That's none of your business, Delicious."

"I believe I just hit a nerve, didn't I? You stayed in bed, while your tired, overworked wife tended to your six progeny. How inconsiderate of you. What else did you and Rosalynn talk about this morning?"

"I didn't call to speak about what my wife and I discussed over breakfast. I called hoping that my client had killed you overnight. I was going to discuss where to get rid of your body." 

"It's funny you should want to talk about that Rod. I had a similar conversation with my uncle last night. The only difference is I know where, and how to get rid of his body; and I can never be blamed for killing him. He agreed with my plan and said it was foolproof."

"Delicious, I am not going to send you to the Air Force Academy. I am going to send you to West Point. It is much further away, and they use real guns. "

"How are you going to do that Rod? You are the one that had a vicious argument with your wife this morning. You are the one who desperately wanted to see what was in that double sealed envelope. You are the one that got into a heated argument with Even's niece on the airplane, on the way to Denver. Your three eldest children are suddenly missing from your home. The ten-foot fence around Even's compound is now electrified, and I haven't been told the codes to get into, or out of here yet. It will sound to the authorities that you had gone over the edge, with all your responsibilities to Even Luck. You are responsible for his entire life; from his bank- books, to his underwear. Your six children became too much for you to handle. Your wife turned into a bitch. All she ever does is complain. Your client's sister dies, and 'Even' became responsible for her sixteen-year-old daughter/his niece. She shows up, and begins usurping your authority over him. He is changing before your eyes. He started listening to her, more than he listened to you. He made you put her name on the deed to his property. She was already in his Will, because she was her mothers' heir. Now you are wondering if the next thing Even was going to do was write you completely out of his Will, and leave everything to her. You two have been friends for twenty-eight years. This beautiful teenager shows up, and she thinks she is going to steal hundreds of millions of dollars from you? It's not going to happen, not while you have any breath left in your body. Too much money is at stake for you to sit there and do nothing." 

'So, what happened between you and Rosalynn this morning?'"

"She asked me whose idea was it to get a vasectomy. I don't lie to her. I never have, and I never will lie to her. I didn't even have a chance to say it was you, because she had already guessed it. By the way, how did we change subjects so quickly?" 

"It is a trick my mother taught me. You tell a long interesting tale, and when the person you are interested in becomes engrossed in it, you ask the real question, which startles your victim. You will get your answer, before he realizes he gave it to you."

"Your mother taught you that?"

"Yes, she did. She taught me everything good I know. She also taught me how to protect myself from boys, who wanted nothing more than to treat me like my father treated her."

"When I saw you in the funeral home, I thought the exact opposite."

"So did everyone I met at school. However, it's the attitude that goes along with it that made almost every boy back away. It's Rosalynn's attitude towards you today that is going to keep her from getting pregnant tonight, not the way she is dressed."

"You are correct; she will not be getting pregnant tonight."

"How would you two be doing, if three of your children were missing?"

"You wouldn't do that to us."

"If I did it, you two would be as thick as thieves."

"Delicious, you have an evil mind."

I stood by the kitchen door listening to her portion of the conversation before I asked her, "Are you twisting my attorney's head around this early in the morning?"

Delicious turned and smiled at me. "Good morning, Uncle Even; I didn't have to twist his head, Rosalynn got to it before I did."

"Why, what did he do?"

"Roz asked him whose idea the vasectomy was, and he told her the truth."

"He lies to me all day long, and he tells his wife the truth. He needs to get his head examined."

"That's what I was doing, Uncle Even."

"Niece Delicious when you get finished with his mind it's going to be like oatmeal; lumps and all. Hand me the phone please."

"You can call me anytime, Rod; I was having so much fun. My uncle would like to talk with you now."

"Even; what is he doing up at this hour of the morning? What did you do to him? If you are trying to kill my only source of income..."

I held the phone far from my ear, because Rod continued yelling at my niece. When his tirade was done, I said to him, "Are you feeling better Rod, because she didn't hear a word you said. I had the phone, and I thought our vocabularies were more extensive than that."

"Don't you start with me 'Even'; I'm in no mood for you either."

"Okay." I hung up the phone, sat down at the table, and waited.

Seconds later it rang. "You bastard, you hung up on me."

"Rod, you said you were in no mood for me, so I hung up. Do you have a problem this morning?"

"Yes, why is she still alive?"

"She told me in no uncertain terms, that I was I hiring her as my assistant at $40 per hour. She types 103 words per minute, so I told her I would give her a chance."

"Even, you don't work well with women, remember?"

"She is not a woman, remember Rod. She's a child. She is my ward, my niece, my godchild, and according to my very expensive attorney, I am her legal guardian. I have to keep a close watch on her all the time, because she is under age, don't I Rod. I have no choice in this matter; do I Rod? You ordered me to go to Maine to get her, against my will, didn't you Rod. You laughed at me all the way there, because she was just a little girl, didn't you Rod? Suddenly, you have a problem with her being here. She is causing you a great deal of pain. Perhaps I should laugh at you now, my friend. Better yet, maybe you should have listened to me in the first place."

"You are never going to forgive me for this are you?"

"How old are we now; 33. I think by the time we are 70, I may forgive you."

"Are you saying she's never going to leave?"

"Why would she want to leave? As long as she is here she does not have to put her hand into her pocket to take out a penny. She will be fed, clothe, educated, entertained, transported, or be given a method of transportation, go to parties, or have parties here. All the terrible things in life a growing young woman dreams of will be placed at her feet. Tell me again why Delicious Mark would want to leave? As my attorney, Rod, your first duty is to put her name, as co-owner, on the deed to this property."

"Even, please don't do this to me

"Do I have to hire a new attorney, Rod?"

"No, you don't have to do that. I'll take care of it second thing Monday morning."

"What are you doing first thing Monday morning?"

"I am talking to my doctor about a vasectomy."

"Uncle Even, would you ask Rod for the name of Rosalynn's gynecologist. I have to set up an appointment to get my birth control pills renewed."

"Niece Delicious, I think I'll let you talk to Rosalynn about the gynecologist. Rod would probably send you to a veterinarian."

Rod yelled, "I would not; I would send her to a mortician. Ask her who she is going to screw, after she is finished with me?"

"Rod, be nice to my Godchild, and put Rosalynn on the phone, please."

"I'm not sure if she's talking to me."

"She doesn't have to talk to you Rod; all she has to do is pick up the telephone."

Rod walked to the stairwell and yelled, "Roz!"

The reply came back instantaneously. "Go Fuck Yourself!"

"Even would like to speak to you, Roz."

"Its 10:30, Even doesn't get up until 2. Who are you trying to kid?"

"I didn't lie to you about the vasectomy. Why would I lie to you about this?"

"If it's not him I'm cutting the whole package off, without benefit of anesthesia."

Rosalynn asked, "What are you doing up at this hour of the morning, Even?"

"Rosalynn, do you want the short answer, or the long answer?"

"I've taken the whole day off. That lying bastard is taking care of the children, until I decide to leave this room. Start with the short answer, and I'll decide if I want to hear the long one."

"Delicious."

"That is the short answer?"

"Roz, I can't make it any shorter than that."

"Let me talk to her Even. It will be funnier coming from her."

"Good morning Rosalynn, I am an innocent maiden, looking for birth control pills. I did nothing wrong."

Rosalynn laughed. "Delicious, according to my husband you should be sprouting horns. Should we start from the airplane ride yesterday, and go forward or this morning's conversation and work backwards."

"Rosalynn, I asked him a very simple question yesterday. Don't you think you should give your wife some time off between babies? He said you would not use any birth control method because you are Catholic. I said to him why not get yourself snipped. He grabbed his crotch and said, "Who Me?" After a short conversation, he realized it was the best thing for both of you. He honestly was thinking about you; so give him a break."

"Are you taking his side?"

"If you tell him I said that I'll have to kill you."

Roz laughed. "You are the devil herself."

"My mother raised a wonderful, liberated woman–child."

"What else happened on the trip home?"

"I wanted to buy a gun for several reasons, all of them involving men. Your husband said he would use it on me first. After thinking about it, he decided a gun would be too merciful and quick for me. He was going to take me up to the top of a mountain, tie me up, spread blood around, and leave me for the animals to eat. I think he may have been angry with me."

"Delicious, no one can get my husband angry. They can't get him angry in court. They can't get him angry at community meetings. The children don't get him angry. He is the essence of calm. He doesn't have that gene in him. He is with you for less than one day, and this morning he can't control his temper. What did you do to that man?"

"I think it's because I have am having an effect on his client. He's not used to seeing my uncle happy. It is throwing Rods' balance off. We went to a department store in Maine to buy shoes. When we finished, we told him we had to go back into the store to buy sleepwear. Rod nearly fainted, because my uncle was happy about it. Uncle Even was spending money on me like it was water. Rod had never seen him like that ever before."

"Rod is not tight with money. He spends money freely on us all the time. Why is it so different with Even, who has more money than God?"

"Rosalynn for that answer you are going to have to ask your husband."

"Why is Even up at this hour of the morning?"

"I asked him if he wanted a sixteen-year-old girl roaming around his house and his laboratory, ALONE, from 8 o'clock in the morning until 2 o'clock in the afternoon, by herself, every day. I reminded him of the untold damage that could be done to his computer, during those endless hours, unless we came to an agreement on his sleeping habits. He will now go to sleep by 11 PM, and get up by 10 AM, and start eating properly."

Rosalynn asked, "Why is he willing to do it?"

"Because he looks at me, and he sees my mother. He absolutely adored her."

A glass shattered, and she turned to see what happened. 

I was looking at my niece with such fear in my heart I almost could not contain it. If she had used the word 'loved' instead of 'adored' Rod's wish for her premature death would have come to pass. She promised not to repeat what I told her last night. She swore it would stay between us forever and I thought she was going to let it slip out this morning. Thankfully it didn't, and now I had a mess to clean up.

"Delicious, what was that noise?"

"That was my half-awake uncle trying to pour orange juice into a glass. The glass didn't make it."

"Do you have any plans for the day?"

"Give me a moment Rosalynn and I'll find out."

"Uncle Even, can I try a new experiment on your computer by myself today. If not, can I have some money to go shopping with Rosalynn?"

"I'll give you anything you need, just get out of the house and don't go near my laboratory, unless I am with you."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 02



"I got you again uncle. From not touching anything in your laboratory, to not touching anything unless you are with me. I am making progress with you every day."

I grabbed the phone from my darling niece and said, "Roz, I'll give you $50 million if you will take a seventh child."

"Why Even, she seems to be doing you a world of good. I didn't realize you drank orange juice from a glass. I thought you drank it from the container, just like my former husband."

"Roz, you wouldn't know what to do without that jackass. What's worse is he wouldn't know what to do without you. Get a 2x4 and hit him across the head with it. As Delicious said to you before, he was thinking about you."

"Even, I'm going out to spend a ton of his money. I'll let him sleep downstairs overnight, just to let him know how angry I am with him. Then I'll see how he acts tomorrow. Tell Delicious to be ready in an hour, I'll pick her up."

"It is not his money. It belongs to both of you, because you are part of the Corporation. You can write as many checks as you want, and he can't do a thing about it."

"He would kill me Even."

"The judge would not put him in jail for killing you. He would have Rod raise those six children by himself. It would be a fate worse than death for a type 'A' personality like Rod."

"Even, now I know where Delicious gets her evil streak from. It runs deep inside your families' gene pool."

"Roz in that case my evil genes have been recessive, until I met Delicious."

"Two sets of evils genes in one household; quiet until they met. It ought to be fun to watch as time goes by Even. It will be more fun to watch how Rod deals with Delicious."

"I know exactly what you mean Roz; and it scares me to death."

***********

5. Shopping, Again (Sunday Morning)

"You're getting good uncle, it's not even 9:30, and you're up."

"Who opened all the shades in my room?"

"Were the cleaning people here yesterday, while Roz and I were out?"

"No they weren't. They are not due until Wednesday."

"Well, since you're up bright and early, we have a lot of shopping to do today."

"Shopping again; what do you need this time?"

"I'd like to sleep on something that does not resemble a bed of nails or any other torture device invented during the Middle Ages. I'd like a dresser that does not fall apart every time I opened the drawers. Some hangers to put my clothes on would also be helpful. Should I continue?"

"Why didn't you do that with Roz yesterday?"

"Roz helped me buy casual clothes which we didn't buy in Maine. Everything we got up there was dress-up, I needed something to knock around in."

"That makes sense. Where do you want to go?"

"As someone said to me before, this is your town, you tell me."

"Have I ever told you I hate eating my own words?"

"Uncle Even, do you remember that echo we had in Waterville? I believe it has found us here in Idaho Springs."

"Okay, we will leave around noon to go shopping."

"Great, 11 o'clock sounds fine to me."

"I said 12 o'clock."

"I heard you Uncle Even, 11 o'clock is just fine."

"Niece Delicious, I am going to start working on a transporter device. I want to see if I can send you anywhere in this universe to help you tell time correctly."

"You better hurry Uncle Even; 10:30 is getting closer by the minute."

"What happened to 11 o'clock?"

"Who said anything about 11 o'clock?"

"I give up; I'll see you at noon."

"Okay Even, I'll be down in the lab."

"I'll be ready to leave at 11 o'clock, Delicious."

"I knew you could be reasonable, Uncle Even."

"Being tormented at 9:30 in the morning is not being reasonable, it's being harassed."

*******

"Oh no young lady, you are not going out dressed like that."

"Dressed like what Uncle Even. I tried this on for Roz yesterday to make sure it was okay. She said it was fine for summer wear. It's a crop top and jeans shorts, what's wrong with that?"

"Roz said that was okay?"

"Yes, I have a bra on, and the shorts are not too short. I knew you would disapprove if they were."

"I still don't like that top."

I opened the door to the garage and let Delicious walk in first. It was a mistake.

"You have a gazillion dollars and you drive that piece of garbage. Mom's car was better than that."

"I don't go out very much, and that car is very serviceable."

"Should I repeat what Ron said in the aircraft?"

"Rod is a worry wart. Get in or this will be the shortest shopping trip of your life."

It was. 

As I exited my driveway, turned onto Spring Gulch Road towards Interstate 70, I hit a pothole, and the driveshaft dropped out of the transmission, and lay on the ground just as Rod predicted.

I didn't even look at her, because I felt her eyes burning a hole in my neck. "Delicious, if you say one word you will be sleeping on the floor."

"Uncle Even, I sure hope you have AAA, because this car is going to the junkyard, and we are buying a new car today."

"I told you not to say a word."

"I didn't say a word. I said twenty-four words."

I didn't even argue with her, because I knew I would lose. "What color do you want?"

"You should buy anything but white. With all the snow you get out here, nobody would ever see you in a blizzard."

"That's very good advice. You have a birthday coming up in five weeks. I think I will buy two cars. It will give you an incentive to pass your driving test."

My niece was all over me like a rash. If cars came up behind us, they would think we were making out instead of driving anywhere. I had to tell her to calm down so I could call to have the car towed, and we could start walking back to the house.

Before I had a chance to do it, Delicious asked me, "Even, does Rod have a spare car we could borrow?"

"It all depends if Roz is talking to him today."

"Could you call him and ask if we could borrow a car so we could go shopping?"

"Do you know what grief he's going to give me when I tell him what happened?"

"If you tell him I'm lying on the roadway, he will be here in a flash."

"He would kill me for lying to him, but he would get here in a hurry."

"Even, there is something else you have to buy me when I get my driver's license. Do you remember what it is?"

"No, but I know it's going to cost me a lot of more money."

"With all those truncated zeroes in your checking account, you won't even know the amount deducted is missing. I get a snowmobile."

I knew my niece was smart, because of her IQ. However, I was beginning to think she also had a photographic memory. I was going to test her over the coming weeks and months, but I was almost sure of it already. She was like a sponge. Anything and everything she heard she was able to repeat verbatim. She might not be aware of her own talents at this point in her life, but as I observed her, I became more aware of the cues.

Rod's car screech to a halt beside mine ten minutes later. He jumped out, saw the driveshaft lying on the ground, and yelled, "I told you it was going to happen. Is she dead?"

Delicious jumped out of the car and yelled, "Surprise!"

"You bastard you lied to me. She doesn't have a scratch on her."

I said to my friend, "You are going to get your wish; I am going to buy a new car; actually two new cars. That's why I needed you here. You have to stay with this car, until a tow truck comes to get you. Have him drive you home. Delicious and I are going to spend more of my money."

"You and I have to sit down and discuss this Even. All the years I've known you, you have been a miser. You meet your niece and your whole personality changes. I don't know whether to commit you, or check to see if somebody has replaced the real Even Luck with a body double."

"Rod, how many people know about my Satellite Communication Link-up? What if I told you it had nothing to do with linking up satellites, but replacing them with fewer satellites by bending radio waves?"

"Even light and radio waves travel in a straight line. They can't be bent."

I looked Rod in the eye and smiled. He knew that smile too well to think I was kidding him.

"Even, if you can pull that off and they don't give you the Nobel, it's fixed."

"I want you to draw up an ironclad contract with Boeing, Raytheon, BAE, and Northrop. I'm going to run a test with it in less than six months. The heads of their Aerospace divisions gets to sit in on the test, but I want assurances all the way up to the presidents of their corporations, and the chairman's of the board that no one will use it to advance their own technology, or research in that area. I don't want them to talk about it to any other corporation, domestic, or foreign, either."

"I will take care of it."

Delicious said, "I want to see a copy of the document before you send it out."

Rod was about to say something, but I raised my hand to stop him.

"Please don't say another word, Rod. She started in on me at 9:30 this morning, and I haven't won an argument against her yet. Let her see the document. It can't do us any harm."

"Even, she said it to you in Waterville and it's true; she has you wrapped around her little finger."

"I agree, and she is changing me for the better. I am developing a personality, which I never had before. Maybe I'll meet someone, fall in love, get married, and have more children than you."

"Even, with your luck, all your children will be girls."

"Where did I tell you to send this fabulous child before I met her, Rod?"

"You told me to send her to boarding school."

"If I have all girls, and I have a problem with any of them, from the age of five and up, they will all go to boarding schools."

Delicious hit the back of my head and said, "Over my dead body, Uncle Even."

Rod fell to his knees, looked up into the clear blue sky, and said, "Thank you my Lord God, for showing me the way to get rid of her."

My niece laughed. "Forget it Rod; you don't have a prayer in hell of getting rid of me that easily. If I die, I will haunt you in your dreams forever. You won't get a decent night's sleep for the rest of your life."

"I told you she hates me Even."

"It's been fun children, but now we have a choice. We can stay here and talk all day, or we can go shopping. Which would you prefer, Niece Delicious?"

"Shotgun!"

"I thought so. I'll see you later Rod."

******

Forty-five minutes later Rod's car phone rang. I pushed the button on the steering wheel and said, "You just getting home Rod?"

"No, I'm still waiting for the tow truck. Which company did you call?"

"I didn't call anyone. I told you to call."

Delicious was already laughing, as she pictured Rod sitting on the hood of a hot car, fuming.

"You did not tell me to call for a tow truck. You told me that the tow truck driver would take me home."

"I told you to tell the tow truck driver to take you home."

"Even, you are a moron."

Delicious leaned towards the phone and said, "Rod which of these two people should be considered a moron? The man driving an air-conditioned car about to enter Denver, on a multilane highway, or a man, sitting on the hood of a disabled vehicle, on a two-lane road, sweating, waiting for a tow truck that he hasn't called for yet?"

"Delicious, have you ever heard of an 'Air Funeral?'"

"Of course, hasn't everyone? They use it in Tibet and other areas at extremely high altitudes, where it is difficult to bury people, and no trees to burn them to ashes. Do you want me to chop up your body, after you pass away, and have the vultures, and other birds of prey feast upon it, Rod?"

"I was thinking of using you for that purpose Delicious."

Very rarely at a loss for words, Delicious replied, "That's an excellent way to keep your spirits up Rod. A better way would be for you to use your cell phone, call for a tow truck, and get a ride home, before your battery dies. Of course, if you are willing to wait until later tonight, when we come home; you will be able to drive home in your own car."

"Delicious, I have come to the realization that I do not like you. Even though you are only sixteen years old, and have lived less than 1/6 of your expected lifespan, I must advise you that I do not like you one little bit. When I get my hands around your pretty throat, I will attempt to get my fingers to meet in the center, and kill you myself."

"Mister Laver, I believe you read my school transcript. Therefore you should remember what my highest grade was in all my courses. Am I correct?"

"Yes Miss Mark, you received a B in Physical Education."

"Would you like to know how and why I got that B in physical education Mister Laver?"

"I am all ears Miss Mark."

"The football coach said he was going to fail me in physical education, because I was not wearing the appropriate gym uniform, which naturally I was not. I told him if he did that I was going to knock him on his ass. 

Mister Saunderson said, 'If you can knock me on my ass, I will give you a B."

After a delay of 15 seconds delay, Rod asked, "Are you going to finish that story, Miss Mark?"

"Uncle Even, how confident are you that Mister Laver actually passed the Bar exam?"

"At times like this Niece Delicious, I have to wonder myself."

Rod said, "Why, what did I miss?"

"I think you've been out in the sun too long, Rod. Think about the B on her report card; the coach's reply, the bet, and tie them all together. When you figure it all out, call me back." I pushed the button on the steering wheel and disconnected the phones."

"Even can the lack of sex cause a man's mind to go blank?"

"I wouldn't know; I've never had sex."

"That's right, I haven't had sex either. We will have to ask Roz."

"Roz could be the part of the problem. I told her to hit him over the head with a 2x4, so he would get his act together. Maybe she hit him too hard."

"I can't believe he hasn't called back yet."

"Well, it doesn't matter, because we are here."

We got out of the car, and continued talking. However, we did not start walking towards the main building, yet.

"You've already decided what cars were getting?"

"Yes."

"When did you do this, Uncle Even?"

"Yesterday."

"Why?"

"If I were to quote my niece, my car was a piece of garbage."

"I don't get a choice in what kind of car I get?"

"No, you don't. I can tell you this about your car; is not going to be white."

"Thank you very much Uncle Even. What made you decide on an Audi?"

"I asked my computer to analyze all the four-wheel-drive SUV's for safety. I put all the whistles and bells in the cars that it had to analyze and in eighty-seven seconds it came out as the Audi Q7 SUV. I called the dealer told him what I wanted. He gave me a price, and I said fine."

"Uncle Even, don't you know that you are never supposed to take the first price a dealer gives you. You're supposed to bargain with him, especially when you are buying two cars."

"There are other ways of cajoling business people into giving you the appropriate price the first time, Niece Delicious I own the land this business sits on. Actually, I own this entire block. It was an excellent investment, don't you think?"

The expression on Delicious' face went blank, and she staggered.

"Delicious, I have never seen you at a loss for words. Are you feeling all right?"

"Even, I..." She began crying.

I put my arms around my devastated niece, held her tightly to my chest, and gave her a few moments to adjust to what I just told her. I said in a very low and sympathetic voice, "Baby, there were times; so many times I offered this paradise to your mother, and she kept saying 'no.' I wanted to hire a person to get rid of your father so you and your mother could come here, live with me, and enjoy a wonderful life. I never mentioned killing your father to your mother, but every time she told me how much that bastard hurt her, I wanted desperately to end his rotten life. If my parents had let her have you out of wedlock, instead of forcing Divine to marry him, things would have been so much better for both of you. It's much too late now; much too late. What I wanted to do... What I should have done for both of you... and what I didn't do; will haunt me for the rest of my life."

A salesperson approached us, but I waved him away to give us a little privacy. He must have recognized me, because several minutes later I saw the general manager waiting to speak to me.

I asked Delicious if she was ready to continue, and she nodded her head. I gave her my handkerchief to wipe away her tears, and her nose. When she finally composed herself, I gently led her in the direction of the general manager, who greeted me warmly.

"Hello Mister Luck, I'm George Burns. Would you like to look around and pick out the colors of your cars? I can point out which cars meet your specifications."

Delicious punched me in the back. "You said you would never lie to me."

"I didn't lie to you. They didn't have two cars in bubblegum pink."

She looked at me and shook her head.

"Look at me Delicious. You have fifteen minutes to pick a color for your car. After that you can get into any one of the cars you like, and play inside it, while I speak to Mister Burns about certain options I want in them. Do you understand?"

Delicious nodded her head. She pulled at my hand; wanting me to release her so she could see her new toy.                      

"Delicious, it is 1:10 PM. I want you back with me at 1:25 PM. Do you understand?"

"Yes Uncle Even, can I go now?"

"Yes; Mister Burns associate will take you to the cars."

As she left George said to me, "That's quite a young lady you have there."

"Yes, she sure is. She has had one terrible week and she is handling it much better than I thought she would. I think the sky is going to collapse on her one day soon and the realization she lost her entire family is going to hit her like a ton of bricks. I just want to be around to catch her before she goes to pieces."

We walked into his office and with the extras I wanted put into the cars, he told me they would be delivered in 5 to 7 days. When the finance department was finished the paperwork, I handed the accountant my American Express card, thinking about how Rod would react to my next bill. I had just added $178,659.22 to that bill. I grinned as I pictured Rod's face as he transferred the funds next month.

Delicious ran into the office five minutes early, and said, "Dark Blue with the beige interior please."

Mister Burns nodded his head. He checked his board, and took down two sets of keys. He was about to hand a set of keys to allow Delicious to take her car for a test drive, when I told him she did not have her license yet. He put the keys on his desk. 

She looked at me, and pouted.

I asked, "George could I get a loaner for the week. It would have to be delivered."

"I will take care of it Mister Luck; you will have it by tomorrow afternoon."

"Thank you very much; our business here is done. Now I have to buy my niece a bedroom set."

"You are in luck, Mister Luck. There is a large furniture store around the corner. You can leave your car here, instead of searching for a parking space."

"Thank you very much, George. We will be back as soon as she makes her decision."

***********

This was my first ever outing with a woman, alone, to buy furniture. I did not know what to expect. I had no idea that women were genetically coded to touch everything in a furniture store, before making a decision on what she wanted to purchase. Naturally, when Delicious made her selection, it was the first bedroom set she saw and liked when we walked into the store. I was thinking about taking Rod up on his offer to take her to the top of a mountain and leave her stranded there. We used two hours of our time to purchase a set of furniture, instead of the five minutes, when she first saw it. I was slightly annoyed with my niece. No, I was angry with her, but if I started an argument, I knew I would lose. I was beginning to wonder if she was secretly on the debate team."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 02



We retrieved Rods' car and our next stop was Walmart for the required necessities and accessories for her bedroom. She filled two wagons full of items, from clothes hangers, to cotton balls, in fifteen minutes. It cost $47.98. It didn't make any sense to me."

I filled up the car with fuel for the return trip home, and it cost $58.60. Our final stop was the drive-thru at Wendy's for people fuel. I ordered a single hamburger and a medium Dr. Pepper. She ordered two triple cheeseburgers, with lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, onions, mustard and mayonnaise, a large fry, a large Frosty, and, of course, a cookie. We set everything up on the front seat of the car, and started home. 

As I pulled the car on the inside lane of I-70, I took out my hamburger and began eating. I chanced a look at Delicious, and I swear her jaw unhinge, like a snake. She took a bite out of that triple cheeseburger, without any problem. I put my eyes back on the road and continued eating. If I ate like my niece I knew I would weigh 500 pounds in no time at all. Yet there she sat, thin as a rail. 

Ninety minutes later, I pulled in to the driveway, and stopped before the concrete posts. I knew we were home, but Delicious had no idea, because she was unconscious. I got out of the car, put the code into the unit by the barrier, and hopped back into the car. I waited for the barriers to descend into the ground, and the fence to slide open, and drove up to the interior stop barricade, twenty-five feet inside the perimeter. I hopped out of the car again; opened the fake rock, and press the code to close both barriers, and open the interior barrier to get to my home.

Groggily, Delicious said to me, "You have to teach me the codes so I can do that for you, instead of you running around all over the place."

I said to her, "My car has a remote control unit that you can put the codes in, and open the gates. However, you still need to memorize the codes. I will teach them to you when you are awake."

"Okay."

After we transported everything she purchased up to her room, we separated it, and placed it in her closet, dresser, and bathroom. We went to the kitchen to have a have something to drink, because it was too early to go to bed. She had water, and I chanced another glass of orange juice. 

Delicious started talking to me. "Thank you for a wonderful day Uncle Even. Thank you for my car, thank you for my bedroom set, thank you for my hangers, thank you for all the little gadgets I bought for my room. Most of all I want to thank you for being so much like my mom, and trying to make my life as easy as possible."

"You make it very easy to love you, Delicious. My sister made you a wonderful child. You are going to be a wonderful adult, and a loving parent."

"You are wrong, Uncle Even. I am never going to get married. I am never going to allow a man to do to me what Julius did to my mother. I will never take a chance on getting hurt like she did. That was a very hard lesson, but I learned it very well."

"One day, Delicious, when all this pain has subsided, you and I will sit down and talk about love. I may not seem like the best person to talk about it, but I know about love. I know how much it hurts, and I also know how much pleasure it can bring to two people. I know how it makes you feel, inside and outside. Never say never when it comes to that four-letter word. The pain can bring you to death's door, but the joy can bring you back to life. Love can sneak up behind you when you least expect it, and bite you on your ass when you least expect it. I told you how desperately I loved your mom, and how deeply it hurt me when my parents' forced her to marry Julius. I did not talk to her for years, because I was so hurt by the situation. The only time I did speak to her was when I was forced to go home from school for the holidays. She knew something was wrong between us, but I made sure we were never alone so she could never bring up the subject. You were there making everyone laugh with your antics, so it kept her busy most of the time. I purposely returned to school early, even though I was alone in the dorms for weeks. It was better than being around your mother, "The Woman I wanted in my life permanently."

I didn't get my act together, until I heard what your father was doing to her. I finally called and apologized for acting like a spoiled brat. I told her I loved her, and could not understand why she was letting that jerk do this to her. She said she loved me too, but she married him in church, and that brought obligation along with it. She could not leave him. The priest told her even though she did not love him, it was her duty to try to change him. I told her that she could not turn a snake into an angel. God could not do it. That was why he cast Satan into the prison called 'Hell.' She was not going to be able to take all the abuse your father dished out for a lifetime. I begged her, "LET ME HELP YOU; COME LIVE WITH ME." 

For the first of hundreds of times, your mother thanked me for my offer to help her, but she said, "NO!"

*********

 

6. Testing: One – Two – Three...

Delicious was daydreaming more than she was reading the newspaper in front of her when she heard me yell, "Where is that damn assistant of mine. What am I paying her $40 an hour for if I can't find her?"

Delicious was halfway down the steps to the basement before I finished yelling. "I am here master. I was taking the bytes out of the terabytes."

"Horse-hockey! You were probably reading the newspaper. I know that because your fingertips are still black. Go wash your hands, because I want you to prove that you can type."

She did, and she could.

"I need you to transcribe these four tapes precisely. If you don't understand what I'm saying on these tapes keep going but mark the spots on your notes so we can make the changes later. Don't forget to save your work."

"Even, can you tell me what's on these tapes?"

"Delicious, this is work that I did eight ago. I won't miss it if you screw it up. However, if you do, you will not be allowed near my computer again."

"Gee Even there's nothing like putting a little pressure on a first time secretary, is there?"

"If I wanted to put pressure on you I would give you the tapes of my new work. It's worth between $50 to $100 billion, probably more when it hits the retail market. I think that would put a little pressure on you, don't you think?"

"Yes Uncle Even that would curl my toes."

"Do you know how to work a transcription machine?"

"Yes, they taught us all about them in metal shop."

I couldn't take it anymore, because she was too quick with her wit. I corralled her arms, threw her over my shoulder, and spun her around 5 or 50 times; I didn't count. All I know is I heard the most delightful laughter coming from her mouth, and it made me irrepressibly happy and emotionally drained, because she sounded exactly like my sister.

"I have been paying you for 23 minutes, and you have not done one bit of work. This goofing off has to stop. Let me know when you're finished. Oh, before you start, memorize these numbers. The first two sets will let you out of the compound; the second two sets will let you in. After you memorize the numbers give me the paper and I will destroy it."

Delicious took the paper from my hand, looked at it for about two seconds and handed it back to me. 

I asked her, "Are you sure you know these numbers in the proper sequence?"

"Do you wish to lose another $100 Uncle Even?"

"No I don't. However, one day you'll be stuck out there, in a blowing snowstorm, and I will be in here nice and warm."

"If you are not willing to bet a mere $100 on me being stuck outside, you do not have the courage of your own convictions."

"I have had enough of your smart mouth this morning, Niece Delicious. Get to work."

She saluted, sat down at the computer terminal to my left, inserted tape 1 into the transcription machine, put on the headset, and she was off. She may have had some idea of what chemical formulas she was typing, because every once in a while her fingers would slow to a crawl, and then pick up speed again. She would do the same thing while she transcribed parts of the engineering formulas I had put onto the tapes.

She took off her headset, ejected take number one, and handed it to me. Then she asked, "Well, how did I do?"

"How would I know? I haven't read the transcript yet. If you got everything right, you transcribed a 120-minute tape, in 1 hour 8 minutes, which brings your typing speed to 109 words per minute with zero errors. Keep going."

I didn't stand by her the entire time. I glanced over at her, every once in a while, to see how she was doing, and continued my own work. I was so engrossed in what I was doing; I lost all track of time, as I usually do, until a piece of paper hit me on my left ear. Startled, I looked up and saw Delicious with her feet up on the desk looking at me.

"Do you have a problem little girl?"

"I have completed your task and yes I have a problem."

"What kind of problem do you have?"

"I know in my heart you can't be a terrorist, but you're dealing with some really radical chemical shit in your work. In the wrong hands, enough of it could take down half of lower Manhattan."

"You are absolutely correct. However, find a way to deliver enough of that chemical to lower Manhattan, in the way it is formulated, and detonate it."

Delicious sat back in the chair and thought. After a time she started to draw symbols and numbers onto an invisible blackboard. Finally she asked me if I could give her a pen and some paper. She needed to write some things down to make it work.

I told her to sit at my desk and use all the room she needed.

For the next 3 ½ hours she did calculus, trigonometry, linear algebra and physics to try to make a delivery system for this chemical in a large enough quantity to take down the buildings of any major city in the world.

The only words she said during that time were expletives; some of which I had never heard before. I would talk to her about those later.

During that time I didn't say a word. I added more blank pages to her stack. More pens, pencils, ruler, calculator and an eraser. As she burned through paper I placed it alongside the desk neatly.

Finally, she threw her pen down, raised her arms in victory, and said, "I've got it." 

I looked at her in stunned silence, because I knew there was no way to do it. I had run it through the big IBM computer dozens of times many years ago, and it was not possible to bring this chemical formulation into a city in a large carrier ready to be detonated. It was not possible. I was either in the presence of another Oppenheimer, Fermi, and Einstein, or Delicious was pulling my leg. At this moment, I wasn't sure.

"Delicious, show me what you have."

"Uncle Even, I know this is going to sound really crazy, but when you put this into Big Even, I'll bet you it will say it works. You know how everyone says bigger is better. Well, with this formulation it is not true. With this chemical, it's the opposite; the less Freolyte that comes into contact with another portion of the compound; the larger the explosion. The problem is you can't go around lighting each little portion one at a time. You want them all to go off at approximately the same time. C-4 is an example. It comes in a block. You stick it against an object, insert a fuse, and detonate it electrically. With this Freolyte formula you have compounded, if you add it to an unstable, negatively charged electrical base, all you have to do is send a positively charged Ion pulse, from a timer, and walk away."

"Delicious, how large are these pieces of Freolyte in your equation?"

"They are one inch in diameter for this demonstration."

"What would you use as a negatively charged base?"

"You could use old automobile battery shells."

"Make me a hypothetical delivery system."

"You could use a tandem 18 wheeler that you see on the highways every day. This one is extremely light, because it is carrying approximately 24 million unboxed Ping-Pong balls. When they go through the scanners to get into the city, that's exactly what the agents will see. It's exactly what the bill of lading will say, and if they call the company that's expecting the delivery, it's what he is waiting for. The driver brings the truck to a pre-ordained spot, parks it between two buildings and presses a button that starts eight individual timers; four in each truck. The timers are set to go off, automatically. If anyone tampers with the rear doors, or as the counters read zero. The positively charged timers and the negatively charged base put out the correct amount of Ions, which creates the voltage necessary to cause critical mass, and boom. It will not be just one boom. It will be a double pulse, like a nuclear weapon. You get the first blink of the nuclear bloom and then you get the blast. You do not want to be around when the blast goes off."

It was my turn to sit in stunned silence. I didn't know what to say. The old adage with computers: garbage in garbage out would certainly apply this time.

"Uncle Even, did I do something wrong?"

I sat her on my lap and said, "Do you mean something wrong like save the world from certain disaster something wrong. Or save your uncle from making an idiot out of himself something wrong? You mean something like that something wrong?"

"I more like meant did I upset you something wrong?"

"Yes, absolutely, you upset me. You didn't tell me that you had a brother by the name of Albert Einstein, a cousin by the name of Enrico Fermi, and the first boy you ever kissed was a boy named Oppenheimer."

"Oh, you mean the Atomic Brothers: Mo, Larry, and Curly." 

"Do you realize how many hours of work you just blew up in my face, little girl. Your first supposition was correct: bigger was not better. That could have cost millions of people their lives. That is going to get you the Westinghouse prize for physics. Go try a dress on, you have to submit this immediately, I have to call a few friends with letters after their names."

"Do you mean those people who work for no agency from a non-agency within a non-government that doesn't have a government from any country on this planet?"

"Yes, that would be them. That's excellent work for a C-D student Delicious; absolutely Phenomenal work. I think I will get you out of high school tomorrow morning, your driver's license tomorrow afternoon and we will start working on college the following morning. Who knows, by Christmas you could be starting graduate school. My sister would be very proud of you. Your mother would be jumping rope; and she could never jump rope before."

"You know that story?"

"Know that story? I was the object of that story."

"Did she actually break two of your ribs?"

"She did not, she broke three of them. She just couldn't take a joke."

I made a phone call to an unlisted number in who knows where USA. The operator challenged me, and I gave him my codename. They asked for the priority of my request, and I replied 'Straitjacket'. The man on the other end of the line said, "6 hours, no contact." He hung up without saying another word.

I walked over to the main circuit breaker, and turned off the terminal for the phone system. When these people arrived they would call me on my cell to gain entrance. When the telephones were off, so were the activators for the gates.

I walked up to the main floor, and called out for my assistant. "Is that damn assistant of mine goofing off again? I will never get any work done in this laboratory. The paper is drowning my computer."

Delicious was by my side in seconds. "Yes, my master, your voice reverberated off my wall. I was following your directions and attempting to find an appropriate dress for the Westinghouse prize you said I was going to win."

"Niece Delicious, I have the strangest feeling that the formula you came up with will never see the light of day. We are expecting guests in less than six hours. I don't believe a dress will be necessary, but dress nicely. A bra and panties are required."

"Are we expecting 'Horny Lesbians?'?"

"Why would we be expecting actors?"

"Uncle Even, I said Lesbians, not Thespians."

"I was sure they were one and the same."

"Did Rosalynn miss Rod with that 2X4, and hit you in the head with it, Uncle Even?"

"I'm sorry Niece Delicious, I didn't hear you. Could you say that a little louder please. I've developed a hearing problem."

"Do you know how the Sioux Indians cleared up Custer's hearing problem, after they scalped him?"

"Could you speak a little louder please; I'm getting old and feeble."

Delicious moved her mouth against my ear and said, "The tribes' women took their sewing awls, and pushed them through his ears until they met in the middle. They wanted to make sure the next time he made an agreement with them, he understood what was said."

She was right where I wanted her to be. If she was like my sister, she was in mortal danger. I moved my hands in a flash, and started tickling her under her arms and on her ribs.

Yes, she was her mother's daughter. Upon contact, my fingers caused her to scream in panic. 

She hit the floor yelling, "No, don't do that, I'm ticklish." She squirmed trying to get away from my hands, but all I did was laugh at her predicament.

"Really, you're ticklish, just like your mother was ticklish. I tormented her by doing this to her." 

Delicious tried to crawl away from me, but all that happened was I crawled along with her. She begged me and begged me to stop, and I finally did. 

However, there was a problem. Unintentionally, my body lay flat on top of hers. I could feel her breasts heaving against my chest, as she tried to bring her breathing under control. Her legs were splayed wide apart, and my legs tried to press them even wider. My groin pressed against her pleasure center, and for many long moments I was oblivious to this contact. Suddenly, I felt my groin expand in length. I did not understand why it was happening, because it had not happened to me in over 16 years, unless I had to urinate. Suddenly, I looked down, and it snapped into my mind. I pushed my body off hers immediately.

Delicious saw the change in me. She did not understand what happened. So she asked, "What's wrong Even, what happened?"

I answered her honestly. "I'm so sorry Delicious. I did not realize that I was in a very inappropriate sexual position on your body for quite a while. I won't let that happen again."

"Even, we were just playing. You were not going to hurt me. I know you would never take advantage of me in that way. I trust you."

"Your mother trusted Julius to pull out of her vagina that day on Cape Cod. He didn't, and it ruined her life. Don't trust any man when it comes to sex, especially if you want to keep that promise to yourself. I include myself in that statement."

"Did I do anything wrong Even?"

"No baby, it was me, I did everything wrong. I am old enough to know better than to do what I did. I should have stopped tickling you when you asked me to stop. I am not a teenager anymore, tickling my sister. I am a grown man, and I was tickling a young girl, blossoming into womanhood. I remembered how much fun it was, and I got carried away. I wound up in a sexual position with you, and that is inexcusable. I found myself getting aroused, and that is what saved me from doing anything wrong. I am celibate, but if anybody else had been in that position with you, and was sexually active, things could have gotten out of hand quickly. I will not let that happen again. I am very sorry for what I just did to you."

"I think that's the point Even. You didn't do anything to me. You stopped yourself before you hurt me. You love me, as much as you loved my mother. You would do anything to protect me from being hurt by someone like Julius. You would never rape me, you wouldn't lie to me. You would do everything you could to protect me from someone who was trying to hurt me, or even if I was doing something wrong, and I was about to hurt myself."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 02



I wondered if I was wrong, but I said to hell with it, and pulled her to me. "Delicious, I have never felt as strong a connection to any woman, not even your mother, as I do to you. I will never hurt you, but more important than that, I will never let anyone hurt you. Whether you choose to stay here with me, or travel the world without me, I will make sure you have someone by your side protecting you. You are much too precious to this world to lose."

"Thank you, Uncle Even I feel the same way about you. Don't you ever think about putting your little girls into a boarding school. I will haunt you in your dreams worse than I will Rod's."

"What a horrible thought that is. I had better make sure I have boys. My woman and I will do the DNA selection. We will fertilize her eggs with my sperm ex-vitro, implant them in-vitro, and not take any chances on having girls."

Delicious punched me hard. "Doesn't that sound like a romantic way to start a family, Uncle Even? Your wife is in stirrups in a sterile room, while you are sitting in a room the size of a small closet jerking off into a petri dish. The doctors are in a laboratory separating your wife's eggs and your sperm into viable little boys, and killing off all the little girls, as they do in China. Doesn't that get your hormones racing, and your heart fluttering with joy? Doesn't that sound like the way God intended a man and woman to go forth and multiply? Isn't love supposed to be part of the process of having a child?"

I tried to lighten up this conversation, but I released the Kraken instead. "It's less messy."

Delicious cried out in frustration, "Uncle Even..." She reached out to grab me, but I was gone. It was my turn to run for my life, because she was angry with me for being so glib on the process of having children. She was angry, but not with me. She was angry at the way Julius implanted her inside her mothers' womb, because he did it with a lie. She was angry with her mother, because she believed Julius, in a moment of weakness, while she was still a virgin. She was angry, because of the way she always had to protect herself from the men and boys she came in contact with. She was angry because she was a beautiful young woman, and her mother taught her, every day, the one hard lesson in life she failed to learn herself. Delicious was just ANGRY, and I was going to be on the receiving end of her displeasure. I allowed her to catch me in the living room, because it was carpeted. I did not want my head to be smashed against a hardwood floor. 

She tackled me from behind, like any good linebacker, or safety would. She drove her shoulder into my back; my knees collapsed, and my body folded into three parts, and I descended to the floor. I now knew how she knocked the football coach on his ass.

I half expected her to do a victory dance around my battered body, but I was not that lucky. She climbed on my back and began pounding on it with her fists, while explaining to me that having a child was not supposed to be a medical procedure. It was supposed to be a decision between a man and a woman, before and during an act of love. She did this while pounding the shit out of me. When I had enough ammunition to throw back at her, I twisted and put her on the floor beneath me, making sure the lower part of my body was not in contact with hers.

I stared at her and asked, "What is your problem, Delicious? You have made up your mind not to become involved with any man, because you do not want to get hurt. You cannot get pregnant if you don't get involved with a man unless you wish to use the procedure I just laid out before you. Love is a very messy thing, and sometimes you get hurt very badly. Either you get up off the floor and try again or you become someone like me. Someone who stays on the sidelines of life watching everyone else live their lives to the fullest. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do. There are a billion people on this planet who would give up everything to have for what I have. They would give up everything they have and love it. However, at this moment those people have a circle of friends and families that enrich their lives, but they don't have two pennies to rub together. It just doesn't seem fair does it?

Until you came along, I had one friend, and no family. Sure, I talked to your mother, but I could never see her. I couldn't do what I wanted to do for her. So that brought a great deal of pain into my life, instead of pleasure. In order to bring you into my life, everyone else in my family had to die. Is it a fair trade-off, for me it is. However, four people died to give me a little happiness."

If my father stayed at home, as I would have, and waited to get the reports from the hospital on Julius, I could have gotten your mother and you, without all the pain you are going through now. I would have won the Mega lottery. What I had wished for all my life would have come true.

Instead, he rushed headlong into the path of an oncoming train, to see the monster that defiled his daughter for 16 years. If he was the only one in the car, I could check it off as stupidity. I don't understand why my mother and Divine were in that car with him. I will never understand why she got into that car with him. Divine hated Julius with every fiber of her being, yet she was rushing to the hospital to be by his side. I can't comprehend that at all.

During all these years, the only woman I talk to on an ongoing basis is Roz. I see her very rarely, maybe three or four times a year. Other than that, the only time I speak to a woman is when I am on my way to a conference, or a business meeting. If I put together all the words you and I said to each other, since we met Thursday, I would bet it would equal or surpass every word I said to every female I have interacted with in the last 8 if years."

"Uncle Even, I have to get you a date."

"Delicious, how would you like to see your head on a plate?"

"Would that be on a China, or paper plate, Uncle Even?"

"China naturally; blood would saturate paper plates and ruin my furniture."

"What are you afraid of uncle? You speak with me very easily, and I'm a girl."

"You are also my niece, and if you weren't my niece you would not be here. As you said to Roz, you remind me of my sister, so you get a pass. Roz is married to my best friend, so she gets a pass. No one else, no one else gets a pass; no one."

"Uncle would you like to say 'no one' again, just in case the people driving on I-70 didn't hear you?"

I was about to answer that smartass question, when my cell phone rang.

After being queried, I answered, "Mushrooms and green olives."

Delicious looked at me and asked, "You ordered a pizza?"

I smiled. "Not unless these folks brought it with them."

"Oooohhhhhh!"

I went to the basement, turned on the telephone system. I opened the exterior gate, and walked upstairs. The car was at the interior barrier, where it turned off its lights, and I opened the interior gate and let them in. I looked at Delicious and said, "Remember, these are ordinary people; they just have extraordinary jobs."

There were no secret knocks at the door, or anything you see in the movies. I watch them approach on the video monitor and when they were close enough; I opened the door and let them in. They were all carrying briefcases, and sat down at the dining room table, without being asked. As was protocol, they were introduced by the lead agent.

"Good evening, for tonight's meeting, I agent Grape, next to me is agent Pear, agent Apple, and agent Peach. Even, you got us up here in a hurry. What the hell is up?"

"Delicious would you join us please."

"Even you know better than this."

"Grape, you want to know what's up; she is it. Do you remember the Freolyte experiment we did seven, or eight years ago, and it came up empty. Well, this young lady just blew it up in my face."

"Even, we ran that through four labs after you finished with it. All of them came up negative. It just can't be done."

"Gentleman and lady let me introduce you to my niece. This is Delicious Mark. Her parents died last week and she is now living with me for at least the next two years until she becomes of age. She took three years of my work and in a little more than three hours came up with a formula that took Freolyte and made it into a bomb that could take down Manhattan from 34th St., South to Battery Park. Does that interest you?"

"Even, you are full of shit."

"Okay guys this meeting over. You can leave. I have nothing more for you, I'm sorry I wasted your time. I am going to put her paper up for the Westinghouse prize and make it public. We will see what happens then."

"Uncle Even that is wonderful. I already picked out my dress, and was disappointed when you said I might not be able to wear it to the ceremony. Maybe we should tell them about the other thing bending, that's not supposed to bend as a consolation prize?"

"Delicious, we are not supposed to tell tales out of school."

Apple asked, "Can I see the paperwork on this?"

Delicious replied, "If I show it to you, I can't wear my dress."

"I know all about you Miss Mark. You are an underachiever in school, with an out of this world IQ. We do our homework also. What do you have that we may be interested in?"

"You can look at all the paperwork; it's downstairs in the lab. However, to summarize it, Freolyte works differently than most other explosive compounds. With dynamite, TNT, or nitroglycerin, the more you use, packed closely together, the bigger the bang. With Freolyte nothing happens, because the chemical formulation is neutral, and will not react to a positive electrical charge. Once I realized that the fix was easy. It's like gasoline. You could take a lighted match and stick it into a gallon of gasoline and nothing would happen. However, take that same gallon of gasoline, the same match, and induce gasoline vapors into the mix, and you get an explosion. 

 

The demonstration I proposed for my uncle was to make the Freolyte into one-inch diameter Ping-Pong balls shapes, which leaves space between each ball. Using a negatively charged base of used battery cases lined in the bottom of a tandem truck. Using rough figures I came up with approximately 24 million balls. I used four positively charged timers per truck, for redundancy. When the positively charged timers hit zero, one, or all of them, acting in concert, along with the negatively charged bases create positively charged ions which produces enough of an electrical charge to spread across the entire base to start the initial small explosion. This explosion excites the remaining Freolyte, bringing it to critical mass and  BOOM.

It is a double pulse, just like a nuclear weapon. First you get the blink, and then the blast. You don't want to be around when the blast occurs."

"Even have you checked her work?"

"I checked it, the computer has checked it, I have re-checked it, and I ran it through the computer again. Unfortunately, she blew three years of my work up in my face. I should take her over my knee and spank her, but that would be child-abuse."

Pear said, "Young lady, you're going for a field trip."

Delicious looked at me with frightened eyes.

I said, "Mister Pear, this young lady is going nowhere. She is under age and she is under my legal guardianship. She will never be out of my sight, ever. Miss Apple said you did your homework. In that case you should know she lost both her parents and grandparents last week. Her mother's body should be arriving any day to be buried. I am Delicious' last living relative, and we will not be separated. 

You and I have a long-standing relationship, and it would be terrible to end it on a sour note. However, my niece has suffered enough. She is not going to be taken away from me, for any reason."

Orange said, "Even you were never a pain in the ass before. What happened to you?"

I took Delicious by the hand, looked into her smiling face, and asked, "Should I have him call Rod and ask him that question?"

"Uncle, he wouldn't need the telephone to hear his answer."

"Mister Orange, we can come to an accord on this issue. However my original dictum stands. She will never be out of my sight. If that is agreeable, tell me what you have planned for her."

"We want to test her Even. If she blew three years of your research out of the water in three hours, we want to know what else she can do. She may be able to help us with some of our foreign problems, or write codes that are unbreakable, or break some of those we are having a problem with. We won't know until we test her."

True to form Delicious said, "Uncle Even does that mean I won't be able to graduate high school this week?"

"Yes dear, it looks like you going to be left behind for another year; unless of course, these nice people can help you."

"How long will this testing take Agent Grape?"

"Miss Mark, that all depends on you. Normally it takes three weeks of 12-hour days. If you can't keep up that pace, it will take longer."

"Uncle Even, if I do what they ask, I think I should get at least two or three years of college credit, don't you?"

I laughed at her. "Delicious, I was only joking when I said you would be starting graduate school in a year."

"In that case, I'd like to start high school over again. I'd like to bring up my GPA so I could get a scholarship to a good college, and not be a burden to your checkbook. How about my drivers' license? My new car is due here by the beginning of next week. I won't be able to use my car without it."

"Delicious, I said you should be the negotiator for the Teamsters union."

"I guess that's a good thing Uncle Even?"

"Yes, it is a very good thing."

Agent Apple said, "Miss Mark, I want to see your paperwork now, please."

"Uncle Even, should I bring it up here, or take agent Apple downstairs?"

"Take agent Apple downstairs and show her your work. If she wants to see what the computer said, call me and I will bring up the results."

"Uncle, you are no fun. I know how to work the computer, almost. What could possibly happen if I try?"

"Delicious if you touch my computer without my being there, I will cut off your fingers at the elbows."

"How will I be able to take my birth control pills?"

"I will get you a service dog, and have it feed them to you."

"Isn't that a little like the sex talk we had last night; a little bit messy?"

"Just keep thinking about it that way, and you will keep your hands off my computer."

"Remember, the second thing Rod is doing tomorrow is putting my name on the deed to this property. That makes half of that computer mine."

Grape asked, "Do you two do this all the time?"

"I'm sorry to say we don't do this all the time. We only do it when we are not working together downstairs. Rosalynn said that my niece is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Delicious and I have only been together for four days, and I could not agree with her more."

"My uncle is trying desperately to keep my mind off what happened last week. I know what he's doing, and he knows what he's doing. He is being wonderful to me, because we are the only family remaining. He is worried about what is going to happen to me when my mother gets here, and I have to put her in the ground. So am I. I couldn't leave mom with them. Her parents and her husband ruined my mothers' life. I didn't want her to have to spend eternity lying beside them. I wanted her here by her brother, who loved her, and I, who she protected all her life. After we lay her to rest, I am going to need some time to get myself back together. When my uncle and I agree I'm ready, I will take all the tests you want me to take, wherever you want me to take them; as long as he is there with me."

Agent Grape told Apple to take Delicious down to the lab and check her work. I had a feeling it was more to get my niece out of the room than anything else. 

I was right again.

"Even have you tested her language skills?"

"Stan, I mean Grape, Delicious and I have only been with her for four days. She has been through a trauma very few people have experienced. She is an amazing young woman, and I will not push her beyond what I think she can handle. I was amazed at what she did today. Actually, amazed is too subtle a word. Stupefied would be better. I gave her my four tapes on Freolyte, and watched her as she transcribed the first one. I didn't ask her to memorize it; I didn't ask her to analyze it. I asked her to type it out. Her mind did the rest. She knew something was up in the middle of that first tape, because her fingers slowed to a crawl as she typed. I believe she is totally photographic. She can repeat conversations verbatim hours after the words were spoken. She told me my sister homeschooled her. I am positive it is true. You can't do what she did today, while goofing off in classes that are designed for idiots. She took metal shop, not physics, but what she did today proves she can do higher math with the best of us."

"Even let's test your theory on her being photographic. I'll put off testing her for six weeks to two months, depending how long you think she needs. I'm going to send you a learning system for Mandarin Chinese. Tell her she will receive a phone call once every week, and be tested on her progress. It will be very interesting to see how she does."

"Give her an incentive and she will do just fine."

"Her high school diploma and drivers' license will be here by Wednesday. What college does she want to attend?"

"If she is as good as I believe she is going to be, you are going to want to keep an eye on her 24/7. You may want to have her skip college, and go straight to MIT, Michigan, or Stanford, and get her into the big stuff immediately."

"Do you think she is really that good Even?"

"No, I think she's better than that, and she doesn't realize it because all her young life her mother had to protect her from her father raping her, and every other young man who was determined to get between her thighs. That is the one problem area you will run into with her. If someone makes an unwanted advance, she will turn into another person. The person you saw today will get locked up inside, and I don't know when my niece will reemerge."

"Should we add some self-defense classes to her training Even?"

"Not some Stan, throw the whole package at her. Build up her confidence, because it died the day her mother did."

"Okay, we will shorten her class time, extend her training period, and add the physical training package. I think we will use the University of Texas at Austin as the training site. I'll keep you posted."

Apple exited the basement and addressed her three colleagues. "I haven't run the numbers completely, but if you increase the size of the Ping-Pong balls from 1" to 1 1/4 " using the same component weight of the Freolyte, it appears that the blast potential increases by 18 percent. She did that in 14 minutes."

Delicious looked at me with a pouty face.

I asked, "Baby, what's wrong?"

"Uncle Even, I won't be allowed to wear my dress." Then she smiled, and winked.

I said to her, "Young lady, you are grounded...until breakfast. Go to bed." It was almost 11:30, well past her bedtime, and she still had to take her shower. 

She said good night to everyone, kissed me on the head, and began to run upstairs. She stopped halfway up, and came back down.

"Uncle Even, can I speak to you for a moment?"

I joined her and asked what was up.

"I have a babysitting job first thing in the morning."

"Who are you babysitting for it that hour?"

"Rosalynn; she wants to go with Rod to the doctor for his examination. It's not that she doesn't trust him, it's just that... I guess she doesn't trust him. She wants to get all the information from the doctor herself. He does not know she is going with him. He is sleeping downstairs again tonight, because he was a bad boy today."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 02



"Delicious, he is going to have a coronary when he sees you at his house. Watch out for any flying projectiles."

"Rosalynn has promised to have him under control. It's either going to be a vasectomy or a castration. One will happen under the care of the doctor, the other will happen on the kitchen table. I think Rod will take choice number one rather than choice number two."

"I'm glad you know the codes, at least I will not have to wake up at that ungodly hour of the morning to let you out, and I can sleep to my normal 2 PM."

"I wouldn't count on it uncle. I left something special for you in the lab. If you don't tend to it by 11:30 something awful is going to your computer."

"I believe Rod may be right Niece Delicious. The use of a gun may be too merciful to use on you."

"Uncle Even, I have made your life so much more interesting in the past few days, you wouldn't know what to do without me. I'm going to bed. I have an early wake-up call. If you hear a scream tomorrow morning, it will mean Rod has seen me in his house."

This time I kissed her on the head, and said, "Good night baby."

When I walked back into the room Grape said, "Even, I never thought I would see the day you were pussy whipped."

"Be nice Stan, that's my niece, and I will protect her with everything I have."

"That is exactly what I mean. You are acting like a family man for the first time since I've known you. You never cared about anyone else. Everyone on this planet could have vanished and it would not have mattered to you. This young woman enters your life a few days ago, and you are different person. I would never have believed it, if I hadn't seen it myself."

Orange said, "Even, it might be a good idea for you to get a guard dog, and wire your windows for sound. We were able to pick up your conversation, with Delicious, from the roadway."

"I'm going to need a recommendation for the windows, because those guys are going to be crawling around my laboratory. I don't want just anyone going down there. As far as the dog is concerned, I'll look into it."

"We will call you with a name, or set you up with one of our people to get it done."

"Thank you for coming on such short notice, but I thought it would be worth your time."

"Even, as always, you are master of the understatement."

7. Rod Wakes Up and Realizes...

His eyes opened, and he looked at his desk clock. It blinked 'Mon 6:00.' He returned his head to his pillow. He was about to return to sleep when what his eyes saw reached his brain. He screamed, "OH SHIT, IT'S MONDAY!" 

He had a chip on his shoulder when he was dropped off by the tow truck; nearly 4 hours after Even left him with his broken car. He was ready to kill him, but he was not around. The hard edge of his voice was leveled at Rosalynn, who was none too happy with him to begin with. She banned him from their bedroom for a 2nd night in a row. She asked him to keep this behavior going, because she had not had such a peaceful night's sleep since the day before they were married. The only time they were not intimate was when she had her period, and sometimes that did not stop them. He was a very sexual animal. Sometimes she was worse than he was. He started thinking back to when they first met:

She had finished eight years of an all-girls Catholic elementary school. Four years of an all-girls Catholic high school, and four years of an all-girls Catholic University. She was sure there were men in the world, because she saw them every day of the week, and on weekends, saying mass, before she went to school. Her parents demand it of her. They wanted her to become a nun, but she wanted no part of it. She could not say anything as long as they were paying for education. However, she graduated Summa Cum Laude with a 3.98 GPA. She was recruited by every top-tier institution of higher learning in the country, to teach English and Debate. She chose Brandeis University, which is nine miles West of Boston. It just happened to be 8 miles from Harvard University and Law School.

Rosalynn was invited to give a lecture on the use of the English language during closing arguments to third year students at the law school. One mistake these highly skilled, highly trained future lawyers always made in their first few years of practice was talking down to the jury. That was how they lost trials or money for their clients.

She was seated on the stage, being introduced by the Dean of the Law School, and being drooled over by every male, and many females in the audience. One of the males was Rod Laver, and his seat gave him a perfect view of her thighs as she sat there with her legs crossed. He was hard as nails.

He never heard the Dean introduce her, because his focus was on her legs. He was hoping to see her panties when she stood up. They were blue and he nearly came in his pants. He wanted to speak to this young beauty after her lecture was completed. He focused on every word she said to impress her that he paid attention to her entire presentation. Ninety minutes later, the entire graduating class of the law school stood up and applauded Rosalynn Callipo as she returned to her seat. The last man to sit down was Rod Laver. He was looking straight into her eyes, with lust in his heart. 

She saw him looking at her, and looked into his eyes. She blushed. She closed her legs tightly as she sat down, because she knew her skirt was a little shorter than she normally wore, and she didn't want anyone looking at her private parts.

Rod saw what she did and smiled. He continued standing and staring at her until he had her complete attention. When she returned to stare at him, he mouthed the word, "BLUE."

Rosalynn went from pale white to rose red in the blink of an eye. She asked herself 'How could a man be so bold as to tell someone the color of her intimate apparel. It was disgraceful.'

As she continued to think about what he had done to her. She wondered if it was truly disgraceful, why she was wet down there. She never was 'wet' down there. She never touched herself there, because the nuns said it was not the right thing for a woman to do. Only your husband was allowed to touch that area of your body; and only when you are trying to create a child. 

No form of birth control is allowed by the Roman Catholic Church. 

(Sometimes Stupidity Reigns Supreme.) Now on with the story.)

*************

Rod took up a position where he could see both exits from the auditorium. After thirty minutes he was sure he missed her, and decided that he would try to see her at Brandeis University. As he began walking towards the parking lot, he saw her exiting the building. Not only was she stunning, but she was very tall, possibly taller than he was. He walked along the brick path that would intersect the path she was walking on. If he timed it perfectly, she would bump into him, while she was talking on her phone. She would have to apologize, not him. She did and said, "Ow."

"I am so sorry; I was not looking where I was going. I was so engrossed in my phone call I forgot to take my blinders off."

Rod said, "If you don't let me take you to dinner tonight, I am going to sue you."

"Sue me for what?"

"I am going to sue you for the terrible pain I am experiencing in my left arm, the nerve damage in my elbow, my inability to play tennis, and possible hip damage."

"You are going to sue me for all of that because I bumped into you while I was walking?" 

"Yes ma'am, you were walking very fast, and not looking where you were going. You were talking on your telephone, and not obeying normal safety rules. You are a menace to society."

"Oh, I remember you now. You were in the third row, looking up my dress. You are the pervert who said the color of my panties."

"Are you coming to dinner with me, or am I going to file a lawsuit against you."

"Shouldn't I know your name before I go out to dinner with you?"

"So you are going to go out to dinner with me."

"If I do not know your name, I'm not going anywhere with you. You better hurry with this decision; I have to be in church in thirty minutes."

"My name is Rod Laver, and why do you have to be in church on a Friday?"

"I go to church every day."

"Why?"

"It is the way I was brought up."

"I am going to make a wild guess. It has nothing to do with dinner tonight, or dinner tomorrow night, or our walk by the harbor on Sunday. You're a virgin aren't you?"

She slapped him across the face, and said, "How dare you ask me that question."

"I said it was a wild guess. However, I will bet you everything I have I am correct. Your parents probably had a stranglehold on your educational upbringing, since the day you were born. You had no choice in schools, which were probably religious straight through college. The first time you made a decision for yourself was after you graduated. You told them you were taking a job instead of going where they wanted you to go; which was a convent. How am I doing so far?"

"Did you look me up online during the seminar?"

"No, I did not. You can test me if you'd like, because I listened to every word you said. I just understand the type of parents you're talking about. I come from a neighborhood where parents tried to do that to their children. They push the boys to become priests, and their daughters to become nuns. I was very happy to be a Methodist."

"I have to get to church. Where shall I meet you?"

"If you think I'm letting you out of my sight, you're wrong. All you Catholics have to do is go to confession and your sins are forgiven. You tell that person in the box that you brushed this guy off and everything's fine. It's even better because he wasn't Catholic. Come with me, I'll drive."

"You know where a Catholic church is?"

"Rosalynn, this is Boston. If you can't find a Catholic Church here, you are blind."

********

After dinner Rosalynn asked him why he took her to a French restaurant.

"Haven't you had enough Italian food to last you half a lifetime?"

"I like Italian food. I didn't know Beef Wellington had liver in it."

"It's not just any liver, it is goose liver; the finest in the world."

"It could be plated in gold; I don't like liver."

"I am going to help you expand your horizons."

"Who said I am going to know you any better than I do now."

"You have two more dates with me. You will agree to marry me by Sunday. I am a lawyer. I can be very persuasive."

"First, you are not a lawyer yet. You may be last in your class, and never amount to anything. Second, you are not Catholic, and my parents will never approve of me marrying a non-Catholic. Third, I know nothing about you. You could be a serial dater for all I know. You could go around every week having girls bump into you, and threaten to sue them if they don't go out with you. Fourth, you are pervert. You looked up my dress and embarrassed me in front of your entire class. Shall I continue?"

"No, now it's my turn. You are going to marry me because: One, I am exceedingly handsome. Between your beauty and my attributes we will have gorgeous children. Two, I am going to be a very wealthy lawyer. You cannot take or use any method of birth control. You will need someone like me to support you, because we are going to have tons of children. Three, I fell in love with you the moment I saw you. Your green eyes and reddish hair are stunning. Even though you are not as smart as I am, you will be able to keep up with me, when we are able to sit down and talk above the children's voices."

"You listen to me Rodney. I am smarter than you are. I graduated with a 3.98 GPA. And if it wasn't for one hard nose, bitch of a nun, it would have been 4.0. That paper was perfect. She couldn't fault one period, comma, colon, or semi-colon. The content was above superior, and she had the nerve to say I missed some salient points. I told her to prove it, and she said she didn't have to, I had to disprove it. I threatened to take it to the Dean of Students, and she said, "Do it." I did, but the Dean said she could not overturn the decision even though she found no fault in the paper. It cost me valedictorian and a car for being top student in the class. That nun sat there and smiled at me during graduation."

"So marry me and get even with her. What better way than to live a great life, with tons of money, a loving husband, and children that adore you."

"I don't even know you, how can I possibly love you."

"Give me two weeks, you will love me."

"You know you're not going to get anywhere with me."

"I knew that when I saw you on stage. Your knees were locked together with chains. What better way for a man to be sure that his wife had never been with another man, had no diseases, and he could teach her everything about the art of love."

"You don't think too highly of yourself, do you?"

"I am one of the guys you hate. I did graduate with a 4.0 average. I am number three in my class, and if everything goes as I believe it will, I will have only one client for the remainder of my life. Oh, I hope you like living at high altitudes."

"Should I bother asking why?"

"My friend graduated MIT last year. He's living in a city called, "Idaho Springs Colorado. It's a mile higher than Denver."

"Does the sun ever go down up there?"

"I never asked him that question. I will the next time I speak to him."

"How about summer; if it doesn't have a summer, I'm not going."

"According to the Roman Catholic marriage guide, the women will follow the men wherever they go. You have no choice in the matter."

"Sir, I am not married to you, I am not in love with you, and I can drop you like a hot rock. So do not your chickens before they hatch. If you ever get me anything with liver again, you are going to be wearing it."

"I didn't order it for you, you ordered it for yourself."

"I thought it was a filet mignon in a puff pastry."

"That's exactly what it was.

"Thank you for a dinner, I'm leaving."

"Where do you think you going madam?"

"I am going home sir."

"And how are you getting there?"

"By car, the same way I got here."

"And where is your car?"

"It is at the University. I will have a taxi take me there, if I have to. I do have my own money on me. I am not your captive."

"Remember, after we are married, you will love, honor, and obey me."

"Have you ever heard the term, "in a pig's eye?"

"You are Roman Catholic. You will follow the rules."

"I was a very good Roman Catholic. I did follow every rule and will follow as many of them as I can. That nun taught me one thing when she screwed me; there are ways around the rules, and I am going to go around as many as possible as long as I can keep my conscience clear. The word obey may become a little fuzzy as time goes by."

"Why are you going to disobey that particular rule?"

"I believe that one will come in very handy. You seem to think that everything you do is perfect. In order to counteract that personality defect I believe not obeying your every word, whim, directive, demand, mandate, instruction, command, edict, order, decree, dictate..."

"Stop, please stop. I understand you have a complete grasp of the English language. I accede to the fact you will not obey me every time. However, I demand something from you. How about we come to a compromise on this situation; let's try, 'Will you love me forever?"

"Rod has anyone ever told you that you are a pain in the ass."

"Rosalynn everyone has told me that I am a pain in the ass since the age of five. The only person that has been more of a pain in the ass than I am is Even."

"You mean Evan."

"Trust me, it's Even. His parents are crazy. His sister's name is Divine. Her daughter's name is Delicious. Their fathers name is Uranus. And the mother's name is Demiter. Even is a scientist of the top order. He wasn't out of MIT and he already had two patents to his name. I am going to be his personal lawyer. Ninety percent of the time I'm going to have nothing to do but study and be with my family. The other ten percent will be taking care of Even. He will need a lot of care. You will never meet a better scientific mind then his. However, he has certain character traits that you may find unusual. He does not do well around women. He prefers not being in the company of women. He is not gay, but when he is forced to interact with a woman he begins to stutter and stammer to the point that he loses the power of speech. Then he runs for cover, and hides. He won't come out until they leave."

She got out of his car and stood by her own. Rod asked her where he should pick her up tomorrow.

Rosalynn said, "Are you going to become a stalker?"

"Probably."

"At least you're honest about it."

"If you give me the chance, I will never lie to you."

"You are full of garbage. Every man lies at some point."

"Rosalynn, if you marry me, as God is my witness, I will never lie to you."

"How often do you go to church?"

"As often as I have to."

"When was the last time you had to go to church?"

"I went to church Easter Sunday, with my family."

"When is the next time you will have to go to church?"

"I'm going to church Sunday morning with you."

"You are desperate aren't you?"

"I only have two weeks to get you to say yes. I would say I'm desperate."

"You also have to get my parents to say yes."

"Your parents can go fuck themselves. If they want to come to our wedding, they are invited. If they don't want to come that's fine too. I want to marry their daughter, I don't give two shits about them, and at this point, I don't think you do either. I think you realize they strangled you all your life, and if they had a choice, you would be in a convent."

Rosalynn leaned back against her car as if she had received a body blow. She knew what Rod said was true, even though she did not like the way he said it. As she was lost in her thoughts he moved in and kissed her. It was not a chaste kiss, but it was not a lustful kiss either. He did not put his arms around her, because he did not want her to feel trapped. He just wanted her to know how he felt about her.

When his lips met hers her eyes popped open wide. Her arms came up defensively to push him away, but his body never touched hers. It was only lip contact, but he never pulled back. She had no idea what to do with her arms now. They stood like goal posts at her shoulders ready to do battle, but the battle never came. They started to move in a dance like pattern, slowly up, then down, and side-to-side. The electric feeling that coursed through her body was like nothing she ever felt before, and she did not want it to end. He started to pull back from her to end the kiss, but her head followed his. It was her body that stood straight. It was her body that initiated contact with his. It was her arms that reached around his neck to keep his lips attached to hers. It was her arms that went around his neck and pulled their bodies together. It was her mouth that increased the intensity of the kiss.

She let go of his mouth for one second and said, "Hold me dammit."

Rod did not have to be asked twice. He crushed her to his body, until she could barely breathe. Still he did not touch anything she would consider indecent, but oh how he wanted to. Her ass was inches from his hands, but he didn't go there. He slid them up the side of her ribs, but never touched her breasts. That time would come later. Every time he came close he felt her freeze, and every time he left the area he felt her relax. All during this time, they kissed. Finally, they came up for air.

Rod looked into her eyes and said, "Hello."

She put her head back on his chest and replied, "Hello yourself; is it always like that?"

He replied, "Not to brag, but with me it is."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 03



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it notated now, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be a few and far between. This is going to be a "SHORT STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.' 

***** 

8. Departures and Departing 

Tuesday morning, Rod received a phone call from United Airlines advising him the coffin bearing the remains of Divine Mark had arrived at its airfreight warehouse. They wanted to know what arrangements had been made to pick it up. 

Rod put everything I had arranged for into high gear. I kept Delicious in the dark, about what was going to happen when this day arrived, so she would not dwell on it. I hoped she would be happy with all my decision, and thankfully, I could reverse every detail if need be. 

Rod called every company involved with Divines' internment, while I called the stonemasons, because this was my private project. The owner told me they were still working on the monument, but it should be finished by early afternoon. 

The final phone call went to Father McAuley, so he would be there to perform the burial rites of the Catholic Church. 

Delicious was reading the newspaper when I walked downstairs and opened all four of our front gates. 

Delicious looked at me questioningly. "Who are we expecting Uncle Even?" 

"The gas company called. We have a major leak our property. They have to dig up a section of pipe, fix it, and bring the land back to the way it was." 

"That's the way they should work everywhere; and not leave holes in the ground where they work. Every time they dug a hole in Waterville, they always left the holes behind." 

"Let's go, Ms. Secretary, you have work to do." 

"You have been a Slave driver ever since you found out I could type." 

"The loaner car is here. I wonder who might want to brush up on her driving skills, before her new car arrives. " 

Delicious looked around the room. "Uncle Even, I don't have to brush up on my skills, and no other females are here. Did you have a sex change operation last night?" 

"When was the first time you expected to see the keys to your new car? 

"Right before your computer decided to have heart failure." 

"You wouldn't dare touch my computer." 

"You know me better than that Uncle Even. I'm an angel; ask Rod." 

"If you touch my computer, you are going to look like an IBM punch card." 

"I haven't been here two whole weeks and your threatening me. I guess I should go live with my Aunt Virginia. Of course I will have to publish the formula on Freolyte so I can make some money to live on." 

"You don't have an Aunt Virginia." 

"Uncle Even, I said my aunt who lives in Virginia." 

"That's not what you said." 

"Uncle Even are you getting hard of hearing again 

"You are very funny little girl. I think I will have my friends help you disappear from the face of the earth." 

"Wouldn't you like to go for a ride in your elevator Uncle Even?" 

"Thank you, but I think I will stay out of that elevator at this time." 

"Can I have my car when it comes?" 

"As long as you have your driver's license, I may let you use your car." 

"I love when we can talk these things through. It's like we're both adults." 

"Thank you for including me in that sentence." 

"What would you like me to do this morning, Uncle Even?" 

"I want you to get into the elevator and clean it." 

"As much as I would love to do that for you, the cleaning people are due here tomorrow. It would be a waste of my valuable $40 per hour time to do that for you. Why don't you tell me what's going on, so you can stop trying to dance around the issue." 

"Sometimes you are just too smart for your own good. I try to ease you softly in to a difficult conversation, and you want me to hit you over the head with a sledgehammer instead. Have it your way little one. Baby girl, your mother's body has arrived. It will arrive here by 2 PM." 

I watched the color drain from her face, and for a moment she lost the power of speech. 

Finally, as her voice cracked, she solemnly asked me, "How far away is the cemetery she is going to be interned?" 

"It's about 400 yards from here." 

Her eyes lit up. "You are burying her here; on your property?" 

"No, I am burying her here, on our property. Rod took care of that Monday. You better start making bunches of money. There are a lot of taxes to pay the state of Colorado." 

She smiled at me and replied, "I will either borrow it from my very rich uncle, or wait to inherit it from him, in sixty or seventy years, when he passes away. I'll ask the tax collector to wait until then for payment, with eight percent interest." 

"I'll pay the taxes until then. You can pay me the exact amount you owe me in a personal check. Just make sure you sign it." 

"Are there banks up there with enough funds to cash it?" 

"If there aren't, I'll tell them to give me a prepaid credit card." 

Delicious hopped up on my lap, kissed me, and said, "One day I expect you to tell a joke that I have not heard 1000 times or more before." 

"It was the only one I could think of with the lead time you gave me. If you were more original, possibly I could come up with something new also." 

"Do you always put the blame on the child?" 

"If it works, I do it every time." 

"You do realize you interrupted my breakfast." 

"Yes, I noticed. Part of the table was still there." 

Delicious applauded. "Very good, Uncle Even that was almost an original joke. Let's go upstairs, and I will make you breakfast while I finish eating the table." 

"What am I having for breakfast?" 

"Would you like Ron's Brains (Lumpy Oatmeal), or the Divines' Special Eggs (Runny Sunnyside Up); with semi-burnt toast, warm orange juice, and muddy coffee?" 

I smacked her bottom and she jumped off my lap. 

"What was that for?" 

"Could you make believe this is a restaurant, and make everything you just listed properly for the first time in your life?" 

"Hey, I'm a good cook. My mother taught me everything she knew." 

"That's exactly my point. Could you forget everything my sister taught you, and make me a proper meal? I have a cookbook that will help you if you need it." 

"That is not funny, Uncle Even. I am an excellent cook when I want to be." 

"Do you think you could 'want' to be a good cook this morning, PLEASE?" 

"Well, since you said please, I will make you the perfect breakfast. I will also leave you part of the table to eat on, when the food is ready." 

********* 

At 1:30 PM, Rod, Roz, and their six children were here, the Blue Spruce trees were planted around the gravesite, and the concrete outer box had been lowered into place, waiting for the casket holding Divine Marks remains. 

I received a phone call from the funeral director who told me he was five minutes away from the property. I gathered everyone and we started walking towards the site. The difference in Delicious was night and day. My sister would be in her glory to see her child looking the way she did. Instead of a see-through blouse, and a miniskirt that covered nearly nothing, Delicious was wearing a beautiful dress, which covered all of her assets. If anything it made her more alluring, then the day I first saw her in the funeral home. 

We were nearly at the site, when a black suburban and a modified four-wheel-drive truck drove towards us. Six men got out of the suburban, and two men got out of the truck. 

I walked over to the man in the suit who I assumed was the funeral director, and asked him what happened next. He explained the procedure, with the steel bars being placed on all four sides of the opening, and the straps lowering the casket into the concrete box. Then he concrete sealer would be poured on all four sides of the concrete box in the top would be lowered onto it; sealing it permanently from water and any other intrusion. 

I told him I wanted the top to be coated with the sealer, also. He told me it would be a waste of money, and I replied, "Money is one problem I do not have." 

He nodded his head, walked over to his men, and told them of the change in plans. Just to make sure it was carried out way I wanted it to be done, I reiterated exactly what I wanted and handed each of them $500. They were exceedingly thankful. 

After the steel support grid was in place, and the straps that would hold the coffin were taut, the funeral director asked us to sit down while the men brought the coffin over. That thing I found it amazing was the behavior of Rods' children. Somewhere, deep in their minds, they knew something sad was happening, and they behaved like angels. 

The casket was place before us, and everything became eerily quiet. The wind stopped blowing, and the trees did not move. The priest began saying the prayers for the dead, up to this point, Delicious sat next to me, stiff as a stone. 

Suddenly, as I feared, the stone shattered. 

Delicious lunged for the casket and screamed, "MOMMY, WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO UNCLE EVEN. WHY DID YOU STAY WITH THAT BASTARD? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITHOUT YOU?" She exploded, uncontrollably, into tears, and the priest stopped his soliloquy, waiting for us to get Delicious under control. 

I was kneeling on her left side holding Delicious. Rosalynn was on her right, talking to her softly. It is difficult to lose a parent when you are fifty. It is hideous to lose a parent when you are sixteen. It is an abomination when you lose ninety percent of your family on the same day, and not know anything about the person you are being shuffled off to for the next two years of your life. 

If it is a SOFT landing as Delicious' was, your soul has time to repair itself. Unfortunately, in this instance, Delicious had to go through the death ritual twice, and no one should have to do that. 

I looked at Rosalynn, and with our combined strength we tried to stand Delicious up. She had a death grip on the handle of the coffin, and would not let go. 

I said to her, "Baby, you have known your mother has been gone for one week. Nothing can or will ever change that for either of us. We have talked about your mother every day, and each of us wants her back for our own selfish reasons. We will never get our wishes to come true. The only thing we can do to honor her memory is to live good and productive lives every day and make her proud of us. I already know she is so proud of you. Look at what you have accomplished in one week. I am blown away by what you have done. She is looking down from heaven smiling at her baby girl, knowing that you will survive, and grow into the person she wanted you to be." 

In the midst of her crying she screamed at me, "Why wouldn't she listen to you? She was so smart and so giving, but she would not leave the man that abused her. Why, Uncle Even, why wouldn't she leave that son of a bitch?" 

"Delicious, there are only two people in this universe that can answer that question: your mother, and God. I offered your mother everything I had so many times I lost count. I have had such a good life I have nothing I could ask for when I die. I will have only one question, if I am allowed, before I enter heaven, or be sent to hell, and that will be it. I will call you and let you know the answer." 

Delicious held on to me. She said, "Uncle Even, if anyone can figure out a way to make that phone call, it will be you." 

"Would it be all right for us to sit down now? If not, I'm going to need two new knees in the morning." 

She replied, "You old people have no stamina at all. However, when you stand up, I'm going to need a little help. The rocks in my knees have taken up permanent residence, and will have to be surgically removed." 

As I stood up I said to her, "I always wanted to play doctor with a virgin. This could be fun." 

She replied without hesitation. "A virgin patient and a virgin doctor; which one will die first." 

Rosalynn said, "Don't look now, but Rod has already made the decision on who dies." 

Rod was standing behind the chairs, with his one-year-old son, Adam in his arms, and a broad smile on his face. 

Delicious said, "God will get you for that." 

The words were not out of her mouth, when Adam had a severe case of diarrhea, which overloaded his diaper and flowed all over Rods' suit jacket and pants. There was so much of it, it poured down onto his shoes. 

Rosalynn laughed so hard she was embarrassed because she was at a funeral. She felt better when she saw Delicious lying on the ground pounding it with her fist. 

I pulled my niece up, and looked her in the eye. "God did not get him. That is your mother's sense of humor. God would have opened the ground and let him fall in a pile of it." 

Rod was holding Adam as far away from his body as he could. His five other children formed a circle, and danced around him. He yelled, "Rosalynn, help me!" 

Roz replied, "He's empty. You can put him down and I'll take care of him later. I suggest you go take care of yourself." 

As he was walking away, I yelled to my friend, "Don't you dare go into my house. If you do, you're fired." 

He looked over his shoulder, and said, "Thanks Even, that is exactly what I needed right now. I have shit all over me, and you are going to shit on me." 

"That is what friends are for Rod; to be there when you are in need." 

Father McAuley asked if it was okay to continue the service. 

I looked at Delicious and waited for her to reply. 

She looked at the priest and asked, "Father, can you picture anything else happening at a funeral that hasn't happened here?" 

McAuley said, "Actually I was performing a service once, when an airplane crashed. Thankfully no one was in need of my services, because all three people on board survived. God is merciful that day." 

Delicious looked around the sky, and said, "I don't see any aircraft in the area, so you may continue." 

It seemed to take hours for the prayers to be said in their entirety, but it was only twenty minutes. Father McAuley wished Delicious well, and if she ever needed someone to talk to, he was always available. His parish was very small and he had a lot of time on his hands. 

He shook hands with Rosalynn, one of his parishioners who never missed mass on Sundays, and often brought the three oldest boys with her. 

Then he shook hands with me, and asked, "When are you coming back to God?" 

I said, "God and I are discussing our problems with one another. I know he's there, and he knows I am here. I don't have a problem with him, and I hope he doesn't have a problem with me. The problem I have is the religion that stands between us. Every time I turn around, the religion changes the rules. I am a scientist. The rules of science rarely if ever change. Religions change their rules whenever they feel the need. There are 1 billion Catholics in this world, and 700 million of them live in poverty. The answer to that is birth control. What does the church do; they forbid birth control. They keep women subservient to men, and forbid divorce. A man can just walk out of a marriage, leave a woman penniless and there is nothing she can do about it. She can't remarry because it's against the precepts of the church. Do you want to explain that one father? The church says we feed the hungry. I donate more money per year to charities here in Colorado, and the United States, than the Vatican does, and I am only one person." 

"You said it yourself Even, 700 million people live in poverty, and the church tries to feed them all." 

"Father McAuley, you should go down to Rio de Janeiro, and stay in one of the luxury hotels along Copacabana Beach. Go to the nightclubs where they serve drinks at forty dollars each. Get up in the morning and have your fifty-dollar breakfast. Then walk outside, go one block west of the beach and you know you will find Father; Slums filled with poor people who have not had a decent meal in weeks or months. Good Catholic people Father, with six, eight, or ten children, living in abject poverty, next to billion dollar hotels, where the rich and famous play in the casinos at night, and lie on the beach during the day. Trying to feed these people is not going to save them. Allow them to use any method of birth control, and limit their family size to two or three children. Within 100 years the population will decrease by 250 million souls. Hunger will have disappeared; their living standards will have improved greatly. The church will be seen as the savior of these people. However, that's what the church doesn't want. They don't want to lose the numbers game. They can't afford to lose 250 million Catholics." 

"Even, you may be right, and you may be wrong. All I can do is keep preaching the gospels as they are written, and follow the rules as they are given to me." 

I knew he could not go any further, so I threw in a sneaky punch. "Father did you know Rosalynn is going on birth control?" 

Father McCauley's head turned towards Rosalynn at light speed, because she never mentioned it to him; not in confession or in general conversation. 

"Rosalynn, the church forbids it." 

"Even, I should castrate you for putting it that way." 

"It's the truth isn't it?" 

"Technically, it is the truth Father, but as far as my participation in this matter, it is not the truth." 

"I am totally confused Roz. Are you or are you not going on birth control?" 

"Rod is getting a vasectomy; so technically I am going on birth control. I will never have another child." 

Father McAuley shook his finger at me. "God will get you for that Even." 

I smiled at the priest. "At least I was not holding Adam." 

Everyone laughed and started moving away from the gravesite; everyone that is except Delicious. I stopped and walked back to stay with her. 

One of the men hit a release switch, and the canvas straps began lowering the casket into the concrete chamber. As he got to the very top of it, they stopped. Four men jumped down to guide the corners in without scratching the bronze. The release switch was opened again. The casket was lowered into the vault, and there was not an inch to spare on any side. They pulled the straps free and began putting the concrete mix around the perimeter of the vault. They waited for the backhoe to lower the top of the vault, and when it was one foot above the vault, they added sealant to it, and guided it down until it rested as one piece. They went around the sides, and used more of the ceiling mix to fill any gaps they missed. When they were done, a job was perfect. 

I asked Delicious if she wanted to leave, but she declined. 

"Uncle Even, it's important for me to be here, until this is over. I was all she had, and she was all I had. It's the least I can do for her." 

I nodded to the driver of the backhoe, and he began filling the hole in the ground. Four swipes with that large bucket and it was done. He lifted it, and began driving the big wheels of the vehicle over the soft dirt compacting it as well as it could be done. He gave me a wave. 

Delicious and I were about to go home when a truck drove up and backed up to the site. I asked the four men who they were, and what they were going to do. They told me they were there to prepare the footing for the monument. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 03



I said, "Doesn't it take days for the concrete to be ready to hold the monument?" 

"No sir, we use quick drying cement, reinforced with rebar, which we did at the plant. This cement is amazing. It takes one hour to dry, and 100 years to cure. It will be here long after we are gone." 

I looked at Delicious. "I guess were staying?" 

She replied, "I am not giving you my $100." 

We watched two men dig a trench 10'L x 8'W x 18"D. They poured in five inches of silica sand and a little water. They pounded it down with a heavy tamping tool, until it hardened, making sure it was level. They put the preformed rebar assembly into that area, and verified it was level also. With a great deal of effort, these four men pulled a piece of steel out of the back of this truck. It was 6'Long X 4" Wide X 8'H. They picked it up, with a great deal of effort, and slipped it into the center notch of the rebar. They held in a vertical position with two pair of 2"D X 4"W X 10' L They used a two by four and a heavy sledgehammer to make sure the monster was level and plumb. They poured the cement to the top of the form, made sure that it was without defect. When they were done, they began cleaning their tools, cleaned up the debris, and left the area perfectly clean. They called their boss and gave him the time so he knew approximately what time to deliver the monument. 

Delicious looked at me and asked, "What are you going to put there that requires such a wide base and heavy center post?" 

"Darling, I asked them the same thing and they told me it was part of the building code because of the winds we get up here during the winter. We get ninety mile an hour winds here, like California gets sunshine. These center posts are to keep the monuments in place. If you don't like the monument, I can take you to their site, and you can choose one that you like even better. You can even design one for yourself. You do not have to be satisfied with anything I do when it comes to your mother. You are the one that has to be happy." 

She looked at me with sad, puppy dog eyes. "Did they give you one that was made twenty years ago for a mobster and nobody was left alive to pick it up?" 

I said, "No. It was for a horse. When they realized the horse wasn't dead, it was too late to cancel it." 

Delicious smiled. "Do you realize what you just did? You just told an original joke. I knew you could do it. Congratulations, it was even funny, almost." 

"Do you want to go back to the house and wait for these people to come; or do you want to stand out here, like Rod, and get sunburn." 

"Air-conditioning sounds much better than putting that white stuff all over my face. I think I'm ready to go home." 

I kissed her head. "I'm happy that you consider this your home. When can I start operating on your knees, I can't wait to get you naked." 

"I always thought you were pervert." 

"Oh yes, Rod taught me everything I know about sex." 

"If you said Rosalynn taught you about sex, I would have said you had a complete education. However, what can you learn from a man who fell asleep on his wedding night?" 

"He did what?" 

"He fell asleep, and Roz had to wake him up by hitting him with a pillow. I was hysterical when she told me that." 

"Is anything sacred between women?" 

"On a scale of 1 to 10, I would go with 1." 

"You women are scary." 

"How do you think we keep men up at night?" 

I walked in the front door and heard the children running around the downstairs. Roz was busy in the kitchen making drinks, sandwiches, and snacks for them. The one person I did not see was Rod. 

"Where is he hiding Roz?" 

"It was funny as hell Even. You banned him from the house, so he looked for a hose. You didn't have one outside. He went to the Van and stripped. I mean stripped down to nothing because Adam didn't miss a thing. He got in, and drove home. I know it's not funny, but I hope he gets stopped for a ticket, and has to explain why he's naked." 

Delicious said, "What do you mean not funny? If he gets a ticket I will go down to the jail and bail him out. I will hand him his clothes, PERSONALLY. Of course, I will be taking pictures with my cell phone as fast as I can. I am sure he will be very happy to get out of jail, with all those other men looking at him in the nude. 

If the police hear him threaten to take me to the top of Republican Mountain, and leave me there for the vultures to feed on, I'm not sure if they will let him out. They may take him to the hospital for psychiatric evaluation. Where is Adam, I want to kiss him, because his timing was perfect." 

"I would put on a protective garment. He has been passing gas regularly, and if he is going to do it to anyone, I would rather it be Rod again." 

I said to Rosalynn, "I don't want him doing it in my house. If he's going to do it, let him do it outside on your husband again. It could possibly mean you would be down to five children, and no husband." 

"Let me see, Even; five children, no husband, 6 ½ million dollars in the bank, $2 million in life insurance, and a good friend that is going to help keep an eye on us for a lifetime. I think we can make due, don't you?" 

"Roz, I will repeat what I said to you the other day. You wouldn't know what to do without that jackass, and he would be lost without you." 

"Yes, I know Even, but a girl can dream, can't she." 

"Delicious, did Roz tell you that from the day she met him, to the day she married him was six weeks." 

Delicious said, "Roz you left that part out, was he that good in bed?" 

"I didn't know a thing about sex when I went to my marriage bed. For sixteen years I went to Catholic schools, and my parents kept me cloistered in my home after I get home at night. The only men I knew were priests. I was teaching at Brandeis University and went to give a speech at Harvard Law School. I was wearing a dress was slightly shorter than I normally did and my pervert husband caught sight of my panties. After I finished addressing the graduating class, they stood up and applauded. I went back to my seat, and almost everyone sat down and except him. He said the word blue which was the color of my panties and I blushed. I was walking across campus, talking on my telephone, and accidentally bumped into him. He threatened to sue me if I didn't go out to dinner with him that evening, the next evening, and Sunday. By the end of dinner that first night, I was gone. He talked me into everything including saving my virginity, until our wedding night. In front of me he told my parents if they didn't want to come to the wedding to fuck off. I loved him before that conversation, but when he told my father the same thing I wanted to tell him for most of my life, I would have followed him anywhere. He was brash, bold, and beautiful to look at. He kept saying that I was Catholic and we were going to have tons of kids, because I couldn't take birth control. I was going to need him because he was going to be a very successful lawyer, and he would be able to feed, clothe, and keep everyone of his children and his lovely wife in the manner to which he would love to keep them accustomed. He asked me to marry him Friday night, Saturday night, and Sunday after church. I said yes all three times. Sunday he pulls a contract out of his suit jacket and has me sign it. I couldn't believe he did that, and I couldn't believe I signed it. He has it hanging on the wall in his office." 

Delicious looked at Roz in total confusion. Delicious loved Roz. She was an educated, intelligent, and street-smart woman. How could any man do that to her? 

I saw the look on my nieces' face, and so could Roz. Roz jumped in first. 

"Don't you dare laugh at me Delicious, one day it could happen to you?" 

Delicious started to say something but it was not coming out properly. I interrupted her saying, "Niece Delicious, do you remember our discussion about that four letter word jumping up and biting you in the ass? Roz is taller than you are. If it jumped up and bit her ass, it certainly could bite yours." 

My niece replied, "You are both lying to me. Rod probably had two shotguns at your head, because he was already starting to go bald..." 

Rod screamed from the entrance to the kitchen, "I am not going bald" 

Roz laughed and hugged Delicious. "How do you do that to my husband? Your timing is always perfect." 

"It was easy Roz. I saw him walk by the kitchen window. I counted to six, and knew he would be behind me. He was a sitting duck." 

"You are amazing, little girl, you are truly amazing. I know you are smarter than I am. You are smarter than Rod, and I would bet you a dollar to a doughnut, that you are smarter than your uncle." 

Just loud enough to be heard by the children, Delicious said, "Second Lieutenant Lily is smarter than Rod." 

Lily heard Delicious and started yelling, "I'm smarter than daddy. I'm smarter than daddy. I'm smarter than daddy." 

Rod mumbled to Even, "Can I kill her please?" 

I said to my friend, "No you cannot. I just bought her a $78,000 car. I won't have it sit in the driveway gathering dust." 

"I will pay you for the car. I will pay you more for the car than you paid for it. It will give me great pleasure to do it for you." 

"If you do that the police will come directly to your door and charge you with first-degree murder. They will know that you were responsible for her death, and we are a death penalty state. Sometimes I worry about you being my attorney Rod. I'm beginning to wonder if you have my best interests at heart. If you did, I would never have gone to Maine and none of this would be happening." 

"I did it for your own good. I wanted you to get out of the house and get some rest. You had been working sixteen-hour days on your project and all I wanted you to do was take a break from the intensity of the work in your laboratory." 

"I love my work Rod. I would stay up twenty-four hours a day to continue to do it. Going to Maine was just a distraction, until I met Delicious. She was as needy as I was. I believe that is the reason we bonded so quickly, and so well. We were both alone in this world, and the prospects of that changing were negligible. Did Delicious tell you she is going to get me a date?" 

Rod's face went blank. He tried to talk, but this time he was the one that started to stammer and stutter. He took one look at his nemesis, and started moving towards her. 

Delicious did not like the look on his face and moved towards the exit of the kitchen. Rod moved to cut her off, but she was too quick. As he chased her through the living room, Delicious yelled, "Colonel Jeffrey, CHARGE" 

She exited the living room with Rod fifteen feet behind her. When he made the turn five children were there to greet him. He collapsed like a house of cards. 

Trying to get up without hurting your children, who are determined to stay on top of you, is like a magic act you have not mastered. You pulled two off of you, and the three others have a better hold on you. He never yelled at his children, but he wanted to now. The next best thing he could think of was to call out to his wife. 

"Roz if you don't get these five children off me, you will be pregnant tonight." 

Rosalynn walked over to him and kicked him in his thigh. "You were so close to getting into your own bed tonight. Then you had to go open your big mouth, and spoil it for yourself. It looks like I am going to get another good night's sleep, while you enjoy another night on the floor, in your office." 

"Don't you see what she's doing to us Roz? She has you and our children set up against me. It's three against one; and there is no way I can win." 

"Yes there is dear; keep your mouth closed and be nice to people." 

I asked my lawyer, "Did you ever figure out why Delicious got a B in Physical Education." 

"Go ahead, Even; kick a man when he's down. Yes I know why she got a B in Physical Education, and I also passed the Bar Examinations in Massachusetts and Colorado." 

"I know you are lying down on the floor Rod, and if you want me to kick you I will. I just wanted to make sure that you hadn't forgotten about that question." 

"You said you called a tow truck." 

"No, I told you to have the tow truck driver take you home." 

Delicious said to Rosalynn, "If we don't stop this now is going to be a fight in this house." 

"Delicious, I'm not sure if Rod knows how to fight. He makes love, not war." 

"What about my uncle?" 

"Your uncle would probably build an android, and have it do the fighting for him." 

"They are two of a kind." 

******** 

A tractor-trailer entered the property, followed by a crane. Both vehicles headed towards the gravesite. Delicious looked at me with her mouth open in the biggest 'O' it could make. 

I smiled. "I told you it was made for a horse." 

Instantly, she kicked me in the ankle, and I followed our group and the trucks with a limp. 

The trucks bracketed the prepared site, front, and back. Two cables were connected to the top of the monument, and the crane lifted the monument several feet off the carrier. As soon as it was clear of the trailer, the truck moved out of the way, and men removed the bottom pieces of wood, leaving the sides, and shroud covering the block of granite. The crane moved it to the steel center post, and with eight men struggling to line it up, the crane operator slowly lowered the monument over the steel upright, and down onto the steel reinforced concrete pad. 

"What is it Uncle Even?" 

"It's your skirt and shoes from Waterville." 

Delicious replied, "Where is Adam when you need him?" 

"He could be the first visitor to sleep in your new bed." 

******* 

"That reminds me we have to go shopping again." 

"Why is it every time I say something to you, it reminds you that we have to go shopping?" 

"Just call it a woman thing. We have to buy sheets and pillow cases from my new bed and new pillows." 

"Your drivers' license will be here tomorrow, you can go by yourself." 

"Really, you will let me drive all the way to Denver, by myself?" 

"What is the matter with Idaho Springs?" 

"I don't know; you never took me shopping there." 

"It looks like I'm going to have another wasted day." 

"Look at it this way Uncle Even; the cleaning crew is coming to the house tomorrow. You would be hiding in the basement anyhow. Why not have some fun with your niece. I'll even treat you to lunch using my $100." 

"The way you eat, $100 will barely cover it." 

"Is that a nice thing to say to someone was offered you a free meal?" 

******* 

Six men removed the front portion of the wooden frame, while others bolted the edges and the rear of the monument into the concrete base. They removed the sides, and rear portion of the frame; and cleared all the debris from our field of view. The cables were disconnected from top of the monument and the truck disappeared. 

When the view of the gravesite was pristine, and we were standing in a row, at the foot of Divines grave, I nodded my head and the supervisor pulled a cord that removed the shroud that covered the monument. There wasn't a sound. Everyone was as quiet as my sister. I was not sure if it was good or bad omen. 

In front of us, almost like a shining billboard, engraved in Polished Black Granite; nine feet wide by 7 ½ feet tall, by three feet deep, was the sign for 'INFINITY' using the word 'LOVE' going in opposition to one another, 6 times, in one half inch italic lettering. It was exactly what I asked for, and it was better than I hoped for. Now all I needed was affirmation that someone besides me liked what they saw. 

If I did not look down I would never have heard a sound. Delicious had tears flowing down her face, while kneeling on the ground. She had one hand on the barren ground, under which her mother's coffin lay. Her other hand was trying to wipe the tears from her eyes so she could see the monument. I knew the words I said to Delicious about my feelings for her mother, became more indelibly etched in her heart. 

When I looked and saw Rosalynn's head on Rod's shoulder, I breathe a sigh of relief. I now had confirmation I had done something I could be proud of for my sister. I could not bring myself to tears, because in my heart I knew I was much too late to do something right for her. 

I said to Delicious, "Do you see why they thought it was for a dead horse?" 

"Dammit, you are not going to spoil this moment for me Uncle Even. I'll kick your ass later. It is so beautiful, what made you think of it?" 

"Our conversations, dummy. I told you I wanted your mother in my life: Forever. I told you I want you in my life: Forever. The word 'Forever' kept popping up in all our conversations. This site is for the three of us. It can be made larger, for your husband and children if you want, but it is meant for me and you to lie beside your mother: Forever. In my Will a portion of our land will be given to the National Park, with enough money to take care of it: Forever. There is no sign in science for the word for 'FOREVER.' However, there is one that means the same thing: 'INFINITY'." 

I bowed my head and said aloud, "May God rest your soul, my sister; I am so sorry I did not do more for you in life, than I should have." 

******* 

As we began to leave my sister, Delicious asked, "Do you ever forget anything Uncle Even?" 

"Unlike you, Delicious, yes I do." 

"What do you mean 'Unlike me'?" 

"I am not a snitch, why should I tell you?" 

"Uncle Even, do you want to limp back to our house or do you want to crawl back?" 

"I refuse to tell you, on the grounds that it will hurt me." 

"I am going to hurt you very soon if you don't tell me what you're talking about." 

"We will talk about it, when I am safe in our house." 

"Don't piss me off Even, or you will crawl around our house." 

"I told you it was going to hurt me." 

*********** 

After everyone left, I asked Delicious to get me a glass of water. As she was walking to the refrigerator, I asked her nonchalantly, "What is on the right corner of my desk in the lab?" 

Without hesitation she replied, "The same garbage you always read: the Journal of Analytical Science and Technology, Scientific America, and Scientific American Mind." 

"Which one was I reading, and what page was I on?" 

As she filled my glass, she said, "You are reading Scientific American Mind, and the book is upside down. I don't know what page you were on." 

"When was the last time we were down in the lab Delicious?" 

"Let me see: We were out Friday, I went shopping with Roz Saturday and with you, Sunday. I babysat the kids all day on Monday, so it must've been last Thursday." 

"You're right Delicious it was Thursday. Do you realize what you just did?" 

"No." 

"My friends and I believe that you are totally photographic: video and audio. If I asked you to recall a conversation from yesterday and gave you a cue of what that conversation was about, I would bet you could give me the entire conversation verbatim. I know you can do it video, because I've seen you do it with my codes for the gates, and what did just now. You have just given me a detailed description of what's on my desk from last Thursday, without thinking about it. I have a little surprise for you, and you cannot say no, otherwise little people are going to sneak into your room one night, and carry you away in the dark. You are going to start learning to speak Mandarin Chinese this weekend. You are expected to speak their entire language within two weeks. It should be quite easy for you." 

"You are out of your..." 

I placed my hand over her mouth before the next word was able to exit. "There is one other thing you and I have to discuss, and that is the use of unacceptable language. Each unacceptable word will cost you ten dollars. There will be a very large jar on the kitchen table for you to deposit your money. This will be an honor system. If you use a foul word, you will stop what you are doing and deposit a ten-dollar bill in the jar, and return to your work. We will start tomorrow. For every foul word you utter, a ten-dollar bill goes into the jar. If you go a full day without saying a foul word you empty the jar. If the jar is full on the seventh day, I take the money. If I catch you cheating, it will cost you three times the amount of money in the jar. Do you understand Niece Delicious?" 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 03



"You slip sometimes too." 

"You do not slip. You use it as a normal part of your speech pattern. You will cease and desist immediately. You are getting paid to work and you will get punished for not speaking properly. I have to change you from the rebellious teenager your mother needed you to be, into a young woman of breeding. I have to break a habit that has been a part of your nature for many years. If I have to, I will have Roz tutor you in the English language, and believe me that woman knows the English language. You should see her in action, with Rod. She corrects his legal terminology. He never gets angry with her; because he knows she is correct. She gets a kick out of it, when she sees his face turns red." 

"Can I speak to Roz about this?" 

"Go right ahead, because I have already spoken to her about you." 

"I should have kicked you before we got home." 

"Do you remember what I said to you when we first met? You said, 'You were going to hit me. I told you to go ahead, because I was going to hit you in return. You replied I wouldn't hit a girl. I said, 'Do you want to bet?' You must remember, little one, my shoes are bigger than yours, and I weigh seventy pounds more than you do. I will hurt you, more than you will hurt me." 

"Uncle Even, the first time I saw you I thought you were a nerd. I'm beginning to think that you are a vindictive nerd. You are just angry with me, because I blew up three years of your work." 

"You are incorrect, my niece. I believe that was one of the proudest days of my life. It showed me that my sister was as smart as I knew she was, and she taught you very well. I told peach, pear, apple, and grape that you were something very, very special. Since that day you have proven me correct. Now all you have to do is learn to speak properly among your peers, speak Mandarin Chinese in two weeks, and then we can get on with your testing. You are going to blow the testing average out of the water. They are going to need to develop a new scale, when you get done testing." 

"How am I supposed to stay angry with you Uncle Even, when you say such nice things about me?" 

"We will see how nice you think I am, when you are typing out my work, and learning Mandarin Chinese at the same time." 

"Uncle Even that's a fucking impossibility, it just can't be done." 

I got up from my chair and went into the pantry. I took out an empty pretzel canister and put it in the center of the table. I looked at my niece and said, "Starting tomorrow, that will be ten dollars young lady." 

"I'm sure you told Rod about this already." 

"Would I do something like that to you?" 

"You bet your ass you would." 

"That would be another ten dollars young lady." 

"Ten dollars for saying the word ass; I could've been talking about a donkey." 

"In that case, use the word donkey, or mule, those would be acceptable." 

"Uncle Even how would you like your computer, broiled or sunny side up?" 

"You wouldn't hurt that computer if I tied you to the ceiling fan and hit the on switch. You love it as much as I do. As a matter of fact, my dear lady, you get angry with it because you are finding it too slow." 

"I never said that with you around." 

"If the door to the basement is open, your voice travels to the attic when you yell. When you say to the computer, "What are you doing, carrying a cement truck with you," some people laugh." 

I called IBM to see if there was anything in the works to make it go faster. The head of IBM's systems department said they haven't learned how to break the speed of light yet, but they are working on it. I think he was messing with me." 

Delicious smiled, "Give me a year uncle, I'll figure it out." 

"Heck, I thought you would do it in six months." 

Delicious closed the distance between us, and hugged me. "Uncle Even, I have a feeling you better start paying me in ten dollar bills. Mom started teaching me to talk like this when I was twelve. I'll be seventeen in two weeks; it won't be easy to break that habit." 

"I could always buy a stun gun, and zap your behind every time you say a bad word." 

"Thank you Uncle Even, but I think ten dollars per word will be less painful in the long run." 

"I could have Rod come over, and give him the gun. He would be delighted to inflict punishment upon your person. It might even go off accidentally a dozen or more times." 

"Rod will never come near me again, after he comes home from the vasectomy. His children will have him running for Utah." 

"What is it with you and Rod? Roz told me he is like the brother you never had." 

"It could be, or it could be because he is so easy. I have never seen anyone walk into so many traps without seeing them first. Can you imagine him seeing me in the jury pool and him without any more peremptory exemptions? He would die." 

"Come here Delicious, let me check your head for horns." 

"There are none. I have had more fun in the last few weeks thanks to you, Rod and Roz then I've had in the last five years. I don't know if I will ever be able to repay that debt." 

"Family does not have debts with one another. That's why they call us a family. Let's go downstairs and get some work done." 

"You think you are so smooth Uncle Even. You are trying to make me forget what happened today. I know what happened. I felt your love for my mother. I will never let her go, but I know she is loved, safe, and at piece with us." 

"Little girl, don't start me crying. I have been very good today. If I start crying now, I won't be able to stop." 

"They say that crying is good for the soul. Why do you have to hold it in?" 

"I didn't do enough in my sister's lifetime to deserve to cry after she died. She deserved much better than she got in life. I stood around with everything, and I deserted her when she needed me the most. I will never forgive myself for that error in judgment." 

"My mom kept saying no to every one of your offers Uncle Even. What else were you supposed to do?" 

"I could have gone up to your father, offered him $10 million to divorce your mother. If he wanted $50 million I could have given it to him, as long as he would have let her go. I just didn't do enough to help your mother. I was too stupid, and too afraid to go against her will. I didn't understand with all your father's girlfriends, and all his philandering, why he didn't leave her. It was like he lived just to torment her. I could've taken care of that in one of many ways, and I didn't do any of them." 

********** 

For the first time, Delicious opened the security gates, and let postal worker drive up to the front of the house. She signed for the express mail delivery. As the truck exited she closed both gates. Since the package was addressed to her she opened it, and watched as her GED diploma, and Colorado driver's license slid on to the counter. She screamed so loud the house shook to its foundation. 

It was only 9:15 AM, but she charged up the stairs and into my bedroom. She rolled up my shades, and opened my blinds, letting the dazzling morning sunshine into my room. She screamed, and jumped on my bed, "Uncle Even get up, I fucking graduated high school." 

I had been up for a short time, because of her initial scream. I was unhappy when she let the light into my room. But when she jumped onto my bed and used that word I smiled. 

"Congratulations you darling girl, and high school graduate, it will cost you ten for that word. You can come back up here after you put it into the jar." 

"God dammit Even, don't you realize how great this is?" 

"Yes I do you wonderful little person, that will cost you another ten dollars. Would you like to go for thirty dollars?" 

"You are not playing fair Uncle Even. This is the best news I have ever received, and you are punishing me for it." 

"If you listened to what I said, you would know you are wrong. I congratulated you for graduating high school. I told you it was a wonderful thing. I punished you for using foul language. I warned you about that yesterday. Would you like to continue using foul language or would you like to act like a young lady is supposed to act?" 

"I am going to take a shower Uncle Even. I am going to scream, curse, bitch, and use every foul and disgusting word I know, while you can't hear me. I will also get clean, while the water is running. I will make sure not to leave any hot water for you. I hope you freeze." 

"I had hoped you would remember that I have an unlimited supply of hot water." 

"Oh fuck, you get the hot water from the spring." 

"Guess what Delicious, you did it again. That will be thirty dollars into the container; would you like to go for forty dollars?" 

"I'm going to take a shower now. I don't like you, I don't like your rules, I don't like your inferences, and I don't like your computer. I will fix it myself." 

"Don't you dare play with my computer." He was talking to dead air, because she was out of the room before he finished his sentence. 

I decided I could play this game too. I hopped out of bed, went to my desk, and got out my miniature recorder. I listened for the shower to start, pressed record, and left it by her bathroom door. I walked to the basement, and went to the pipes that fed the hot water systems. I closed both the main and auxiliary hot water feeds. I knew it would take about one minute for the systems to purge itself of hot water, so I leisurely walked up the stairs, stood by the stairwell that led to the second floor, and waited. Thank goodness for the tape recorder, because I could not possibly count all the invectives that came out of her mouth in the next minute. I don't believe ninety percent of them are in Webster's Collegiate Dictionary. 

"Uncle Even, you no good cock sucking, ass hole licking, corn holing bastard. Your ass is mine." 

I won't bore you with the rest of her tirade because it went on until she opened the bathroom door, with only a towel wrapped around her, and soap in her hair. She saw me standing at the bottom of the stairwell, holding my sides, and laughing hysterically. She was not amused. 

"You know this means war you prick. I couldn't get the soap out of my eyes the water was so fucking cold." 

I said, "I am going to turn the hot water on so you can finish your shower. Then I'm going to tabulate all of the inappropriate words you used during your tirade. I believe you are going to be using next weeks' salary to feed the pretzel jar." 

Delicious' face was scarlet. "If you know how to do it Uncle Even; go fuck yourself." 

"Niece Delicious, I believe you just started on the following weeks' salary." 

"I'm not going anywhere, are you?" 

"If you tell that to Rod, he will die of depression." 

"I'll find Rosalynn a good Jewish boy, and get him clipped before she gets in bed with him. She doesn't need any more children." 

"You are going to cause Father McAuley a heart attack. First Rosalynn marries a Methodist, and now you're going to have her marry a Jewish boy. McAuley is going to think she's anti-Catholic men." 

"Do you think Rosalynn's mother would have missed her only daughters' wedding, if she had not been ordered to her husband? Mother's and a daughter's are attached at the hip. She would have been there if she had to walk." 

"Finish your shower; you're dripping on my hardwood floors." 

"Who gives rats..." 

I applauded as she held back from the use of an inappropriate word. 

I could see her fuming at me from twenty feet above. 

"If I had a baseball, softball, tennis ball, basketball, or anything round Uncle Even, your ears would be ringing right now." 

"I didn't know you liked playing sports. I can send you the YMCA camp in town. You can play with the other little children." 

That did it, and I knew it would. 

"Fuck you and the horse you rode in on." 

I stuck my head around the corner, and looked up at her. "Oh, you like riding horses also?" 

Something happened upstairs, I could see it in her body language. "I am such a fucking idiot. You played me, and I fell for it. I don't like you Uncle Even. You had me act like Rod, while you played me. You goaded me, and made me fall into every trap I laid for him. As I got more and more angry, I made more mistakes and fell into more traps. Very cute you monster; you are smarter than that dumb computer downstairs." 

"It took you long enough to realize what I was doing. How did it feel being on the other side?" 

"Okay, it was not fun. Are you ordering me to ease up on him?" 

"I hope never to have to order you to do anything. I want you to use your own good judgment. You have to learn where to draw the line between having fun, and being offensive. I don't believe you've crossed that line yet, but I don't want you to either. Would you please finish your shower, and put some clothes on, that towel is getting shorter than your miniskirt." 

"Well one thing you know for sure, there is nothing underneath the towel. You will never know for sure if there was anything underneath the miniskirt." 

"I don't care either way; I don't want to see what's under there." 

"Mom used to say, 'If you've seen one you've seen them all." 

"As you know I saw your mother's, so I don't have to see yours, or anyone else's." 

********* 

The new bedroom set arrived Thursday afternoon, and by the time Delicious had the men set the bedroom up the way she wanted it, they moved it seven times. As they left his house, Even tipped the men handsomely. He told them the story about her buying the furniture. After hearing the story, the furniture men wished him luck with her living in his house. 

As soon as the front gates were closed, Delicious called out, "Uncle Even could you come up here for a moment?" 

I walked into her bedroom and it looked absolutely idyllic. The furniture fit perfectly. It blended into the room perfectly, and from the bed skirt, sheet set, comforter, and duvet everything she picked out was magnificent. Unfortunately, I am a man, and I made a man's mistake; I told her how gorgeous it was. 

She cried out, "It's so ordinary." 

"What do you mean it's ordinary? I have never seen anything more perfect for a teenager in my entire life." 

"How many teenage girls' rooms have you been in? This looks like a bedroom for a forty-year-old spinster. I'm going to have to return everything and start all over again." 

I don't know why, but suddenly I felt like a fish with a hook protruding from its mouth, and a young woman named Delicious was holding a string ready to set it in my jaw. I decided to play along. 

"Since you're not happy, and your happiness is the only thing I care about, let's wrap everything up as carefully as possible. We will start making the returns with the things that you purchased here in Idaho Springs. I will call the furniture company tomorrow and make arrangements for them to come back Monday to pick up the furniture. Our new cars are due here the same day, and we can take one of them for a ride into Denver Tuesday. We can make some returns while we are there. We can look for a new bedroom set, and stop at Wendy's for lunch. How does that sound? 

"How did you know Uncle Even? What gave it away?" 

"You played your cards to soon my dear. Not enough time had passed between my gambit and yours. This room is too perfect for you not to like it. I wouldn't care if it were for an eighty-year-old teenager or for a rambunctious soon to be seventeen-year-old. You did a magnificent job, and you should be proud of yourself. If you fail at math, you could always become an interior designer." 

"Thank you, Uncle; it's always nice to know I have a second career to fall back on." 

"You also have a third career to fall back on. You are extraordinarily beautiful young woman, and you could become a model; as long as they start from the neck down." 

I ran out of her room, down the two flights of stairs into the lab. She was about twenty feet behind me, because she started throwing pillows and knickknacks at me first. I still had to work on her language skills, but that would come with time. 

By the time she reached me, 'Big Even' was running at full speed, and I was pointing at her position. 

"You cheat to get an advantage every time we argue Uncle Even." 

I laughed at her, "I have to cheat, because my niece tells me I am becoming old and feeble." 

"Wrong; you are old and feeble." 

"I'm having trouble remembering how much I pay you per hour, because I am old and feeble. Was it fifteen dollars an hour or ten dollars an hour?" 

"It is five dollars per hour Uncle Even. However, there is a new way to tell time. It is called, "Delicious Time." Every dash is a mini. Five minis equal in increment. There are twelve increments in each circumference of the clock. This makes my base rate of pay, without bonuses, or over time, $60 per circumnavigation of the clock." 

She looked at me with an evil grin on her face. 

I had an equally huge grin on my mind. She had taken my reduction in her salary in stride. Without batting an eyelash, she turned my reduction in her salary, and given herself a race of $20 per hour. 

I laughed. "Delicious if you were my sister, I would be all over you now, tickling you without mercy. That was a wonderful piece of work, and you did it without breaking a sweat. I am extremely proud of you." 

"Can I take my money out of the jar now?" 

"No you cannot. You know the rules, and I expect to be a rich man next Thursday morning at breakfast." 

"Would you like to add another $100 to that bet?" 

"What is it with you and your $100 bets?" 

"I don't know, but I haven't lost a $100 bet yet." 

"Well, there's always a first time, and this is going to be it. I will put my $100 underneath the pretzel jar tonight. I expect to see yours there by morning." 

"Why, I'm good for it; I'm gainfully employed." 

"Have you called to find out the price of your automobile insurance? Have you seen the price of gasoline, oil changes, and putting air into your tires?" 

"They do not charge you for putting air into your tires." 

"They don't? Every time I bring my car in to be serviced, the charge me." 

"That's because you are fucking idiot." 

"I got you again little girl. That'll be ten dollars please." 

"I don't like you Uncle Even." 

"If you would keep up with the times Niece Delicious, the reason they charge me for putting air in the tires. It's not air; its nitrogen. It's colder than air, and it's lighter than air, and it makes your tires run cooler and last longer." 

"How was I supposed to know that; I don't own a car?" 

"I will teach you everything you ever wanted to know about automobiles when they get here." 

"Can I just read the owner's manual, please?" 

"That's what I normally do. I just thought we could do it together." 

"You are some piece of work Even." 

"Yes, I know." 

*************** 

9. Tricks and Road Trips 

By Sunday morning Delicious was writing out little pieces of paper with the number ten on them in exchange for $10 bills. She would have to repay the pretzel jar when she got paid. It was to the point she was mumbling to herself every time she did it. She even put paper in the jar when she slipped in private as a matter of pride. She would look at me with hate and her eyes, look at the $100 bills sitting under the jar, turn, scream, and walk away. 

Today was not a workday for us. Sunday I downloaded everything from the computer, put it on magnetic disks, and stored them in a vault. Delicious was so bored she did not know what to do with herself, until I received a phone call on my cell. When I hung up I looked at her and said, "You won't be bored for long. My friends have sent you your Chinese lessons. You will be tested every Saturday at 6 PM. Each session is marked, no excuses will be accepted. Also, there will be no falloff in your work for me, or your pay will be reduced." 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 03



"You know that's impossible Uncle Even. If they want me to learn a new language I'm going to have to bust my hump doing that, and doing your piddly little garbage will just get in my way." 

"Did you just say, "My piddly little garbage?" 

"I didn't mean it like that, but you not giving me anything hard to do anymore. It's not like the Freolyte problem you wanted me to solve. This is all mundane math and physics. I was hoping to do something hard again." 

I walked over, and held her in my arms. "Child, I want to be alive when you grow up. I want to see what you are going to do to this world. If things I am giving you to do are mundane, you are above 90 percent of the college students studying these areas of mathematics in Doctoral Programs. I have to get you down to Austin, and have them test you. You are going to knock their socks off." 

"But I don't want to leave you Uncle Even; I wouldn't know what to do with myself if you aren't around." 

"We will take this 1 step at a time. I will not let you go until you are ready to go. If that time doesn't come, we will grow old together. However, I have the feeling that you are going to blossom into a wonderful young woman, and everything that goes with it. You are going to meet a young man, who will take your breath away. You and he will take it one-step at a time, and from that point on you will make that decision. Don't argue with me now, because I've heard you say it before. You are very young, and you have a lot of years ahead of you. Right now the only thing I'm concerned with is the money in that jar, and the two $100 bills under it. They are mine." 

"BULLSHIT!" 

"That will be $10 please." 

"You cheated again Uncle Even." 

"Yes, and I'm so good at it." 

********** 

The buzzer went off at the gate and I opened both of them for the delivery I expected. Much to my surprise a uniformed Air Force Lieutenant delivered the box. 

"You must be very important Mister Luck. They normally don't let these programs off site." 

Suddenly his eyes left mine, and I knew where they were looking. Delicious had just joined us. 

"This is my niece Delicious Mark. She just moved here from Waterville Maine. She is the reason for what's in this box." 

The officer nodded his head and said hello, more with the hunger in his eyes, then with the words from his mouth. 

"Sir, this program is meant for a linguist, not for an adolescent." 

Delicious was about to say something, but I held up my hand to her before she had a chance to jump down his throat. 

"Lieutenant with all due respect, she will have the Mandarin language memorized in 2 weeks; 3 weeks at the most. She will also be working on my computer digital science project at the same time. Do not insult her again." 

He looked at me and then at Delicious. "I'm sorry miss, I meant no disrespect. I apologize." 

"You know the way out Lieutenant; drive safely, and have a good day." 

As he drove off I said to Delicious, "I hope you are not going to make a liar out of me." 

"Can I take my money out of the pretzel jar?" 

"I'd rather be a liar. All that money is mine, and that $100 bill of yours is going to be prominently displayed on my head." 

"Could you glue to your mouth instead?" 

"I have been living in this compound for 7 years. I am used to hearing no one's voice but my own. You on the other hand have to communicate orally, otherwise you will go crazy. Change that please; you will go crazier than you already are." 

After she hit me, she said, "I'll still bet you talk first." 

"It will get awful quiet in here, and you are not going to be able to take it." 

"After I win this bet, would you like to place another $100 bet?" 

"You just love to lose money little miss. I may be able to stop working, with you living here." 

"Who are you kidding Uncle Even. You could stop working and live off the interest on your money now. You own that whole city block; and the income from that alone would keep you happy for the rest of your life." 

"Enough talking, where do you want to work on your language lessons?" 

"My bedroom for now, and if I need to change my location, I'll let you know." 

************** 

9. Rides and Rod 

10:30 Monday morning, I was fine-tuning my experiment bending radio waves, while Delicious sat at her desk learning to speak the Mandarin dialect of Chinese. I had to answer the phone, because Delicious was wearing a headset, which canceled out 99.97% of all outside noise. It was state of the art, and it was one of my first patented products, while I was still a student at MIT. 

I took the message and smiled. I opened a large felt tip marker and wrote four letters on a piece of paper. I walked up the two flights of stairs, and stopped at the open doorway to Delicious' room. As she peered into her mirror she saw me standing there. 

She waved to me, turned around, but did not remove her headset until I showed her the piece of paper with the letters: C A R S. 

She screamed with joy, turned off the machine, and pulled off her headset. "When Uncle Even, when are they going to be here?" 

"You talked first; that $100 is mine. The delivery driver said 5 minutes, but you can't go outside in your pajamas." 

"I hate you Uncle Even; you tricked me again. Leave my room before you see something you don't want to see." 

"Delicious, you have played your tough girl act very realistically since you were 12 years old. Now I am going to call your bluff. Go ahead, drop pajama bottoms, and I will be right here to see if you shave your pussy or not. You told Rod and me that you are a virgin and I believe you. It does not mean that you were not an exhibitionist. Go ahead girl; let me see what you have." 

Her right hand was on the string that would untie the bow that held the bottom of her pajamas together, but her hand would not move. I saw tears begin to well up in her eyes, and that was as far as I wanted this lesson to go. I moved quickly, and gathered her into my arms. As soon as she felt safe, she burst into tears. 

"Why did you do that to me Uncle Even?" 

"You can't do that and expect to get away with it all the time. If you are in a room with a young man, and don't pull that string, he will pull it for you. You will be at his mercy, and he will not be as generous as I was. You will have intercourse with him, whether you want to or not. It will not be a pleasant experience for you. I want your first time to be a glorious experience; preferably in a bed, and definitely not in the back seat of a car. You must learn to control your actions, just as you are learning to control your language. Oh by the way, you lose you talked first." 

"Learning to control my language is becoming very expensive Uncle Even." 

"When you cannot afford to put gasoline in your car, your language will become perfect in a matter of days. However, the pretzel jar stays on the table just in case there are any relapses. My $100 bill will always be there. When you slip, I expect yours to be there, plus a $10 bill inside the jar." 

"I don't like you Uncle Even. I love you with all my heart, as I'm sure my mother did, but you do not fight fair. You make up the rules as you go along, and when you see a weakness, you take advantage of it." 

"Darling Delicious, isn't that what all good parents do to their children to make them better than they are?" 

The buzzer for the main gate sounded, and Delicious tried to get by me and get downstairs to see the cars. I grabbed her around her waist, and dumped her on her bed. 

"CLOTHES, NOW!" 

"Get out of my room so I can get into my clothes and play with my new car, please!" 

"Does that mean I can't watch?" I ducked into the hallway quickly, just before a pillow went flying through the door. 

She yelled, "Does that answer your question?" 

"I would have understood your answer more clearly, if you had hit me." 

"Watch out Uncle Even; I have a car now, and you may get your wish." 

*********** 

I punched in the codes for both security fences to come down simultaneously, and watched the monstrous truck make its way through the turns in my driveway. I thought to myself this driver must have years of experience to be able to do what he had just accomplished without leaving the paved surface. 

When the driver exited the cab I was amazed. He couldn't have been more than 20 or 21 years old. He stood about 6'2" tall, was well muscled, with black slicked back hair, and a baby face. 

He was walking towards me, with a clipboard in his hands, when she ran out of the house. His mouth opened, the clipboard fell to the floor, and his feet stopped midstride. I felt sorry for him, because he didn't stand a chance. 

She was wearing a pink crop top, tight pink shorts, pink socks, and white tennis shoes. She looked 'HOT in PINK.' 

She bent down, picked up his clipboard, stepped back, and looked up into his eyes. 

After a seconds hesitation she offered her hand and said, "Hi, my name is Delicious. Do you know which one of these cars belongs to me?" 

As he regained the power of speech, he took her offered hand and said, "Hello Miss Delicious, my name is Duncan, Duncan Apple. Neither of these cars is registered to you personally. They are registered to a corporation." 

Delicious turned to me, but before she could say anything, I said, "The car is yours, but for insurance purposes both of them are registered through one of my corporations. It is safer for you, and for me to do it that way. You can never be sued personally by anyone. They have to sue the corporation instead." 

She nodded her head, and said, "Oh." 

I breathe a sigh of relief. A major argument had been avoided. 

Delicious looked him up into his dark eyes again, and asked, "Could you start taking the cars down now please, Duncan?" 

He released her hand and said, "Absolutely Missy." 

He walked a little funny on his way back to the truck and I pointed it out to my niece. 

"Do you see what you did to that poor young man, by being nice to him?" 

"No, what did I do?" 

"That young man has an erection so large and hard, he can barely walk straight. It will take him a few moments to get it under control so he can do his work properly. You did nothing wrong or inappropriate; neither did he. It is just a natural reaction between a handsome young man, and a beautiful young woman. He could be married, with four children, and love his wife dearly. It does not matter; a man's body will react to a beautiful woman the same way every time. Hormones rush through the bloodstream, pheromones are picked up through the olfactory senses, and the body of a man will react the same way all around the world." 

"I will tell you something if you promise not to laugh at me." 

"I will try my best, but sometimes you tell me the funniest things and it is a natural reaction for me to laugh. What is on your mind sweetheart?" 

"Duncan is not the only one with a problem. I'm going to have to go upstairs and change my panties. I'm all wet down there." 

I tried, I mean I really tried not to laugh, but I failed miserably. I grabbed Delicious and hugged her tight to my body until I stopped chuckling. I looked into her eyes and she was not happy with me. She was as pink as her clothing. Duncan was far enough away that I did not have to whisper. 

"I cannot wait for Halloween." 

She said "Why?" 

"Have you ever gone to a carnival where you have people throw a ball, hit a bulls-eye, and a man or woman drops into a barrel filled with water?" 

"Yes, we had it at our school to raise money for our athletic teams." 

"Well, this year we are only going to have one person sitting on that little chair, and we are going to be 'Dunkin Apple!" 

Delicious burst out laughing at my little joke. 

I said, "STOP, what are you laughing about? If you two get married, you are going to be a 'DELICIOUS APPLE." 

"I am not getting married. I told you I would never allow a man to have that power over me. 

I whispered, "Why are your panties wet?" 

"I am not telling you anything ever again." 

"I will tell you something if you promise not to laugh at me." 

"Here is that damn echo again. Go ahead; I will try not to laugh as long and as loud as you laughed at me." 

"I didn't need you to tell me that you had an orgasm, while you were talking to Duncan. When you returned to my side, your body was giving off an aroma that gave you away. It is a delicious and edible treat that most men love drinking from the source. They would rather drink that honey from your vagina than the finest wine ever made." 

"How would you know that tidbit of information Uncle Even?" 

"What do I do in this wonderfully secure compound of mine?" 

"Research." 

"What is my line of work?" 

"You are a research scientist." 

I looked into her eyes and let her words sink into her brain. 

"How stupid can one person be, Uncle Even?" 

"I'm not absolutely sure. Should I call Rod and ask him the question about the coach, the B, and knocking him on his ass?" 

"No, I think he would hurt me this time." 

"Rod does not have a mean spirited bone in his body. He would never hurt my niece for fear of losing my account." 

"You have to promise me never to do that to him Uncle Even. Rod and I talked about you as he drove me home. He would give up both his arms to protect you." 

"I wouldn't do it to him anyhow. He's been a pain in my ass since I was five years old. I wouldn't know what to do without him in my life. He is the only constant I have had since elementary school. If it were not for Rod, I would have gone mad years ago. That's why I drive him crazy about being in my Will. It's my only way of getting back at him." 

"Maybe you should join me at his house Wednesday morning, when he comes home from having the procedure done. If you want to see fear in a grown man's eyes, you will see it then." 

"What are you going to do to my friend this time Delicious?" 

"I will swear to you on a stack of Bibles, I am not going to do a thing Wednesday morning, except babysit." 

"What are you going to teach those six adorable children of his to do to their father when he comes home?" 

"Later today, when you are not working down in the lab, I'm going to make 40 foam balls; white, three inches in circumference, and I'm going to paint red stitching in the same pattern as baseballs. What do you think Rod will do, when he sees his children throwing them at him as he enters the house?" 

"Delicious when Rod recovers from his heart attack he is going to buy the biggest gun available and come searching for you. He is not going to want to miss when he aims at your evil horns. Does Roz know about this attack on her husband?" 

"Roz wants to know where I come up with these ideas. I tell her it must come from your side of the family. She thinks it's wonderful that we are together." 

"Did you ask Rod his opinion of our pairing?" 

"No, I didn't; the children were still awake." 

Duncan parked the first Audi Q7 SUV by the garage, and walked back up the ramp to get the second one. Except for their license plates they were identical, inside and out. 

After I finished assigning the paperwork I said, "Mister Apple do you live in this area?" 

"Yes sir, down by Conifer, about forty miles from here." 

"Is it an easy trip for you to get here?" 

"Yes sir, why do you ask?" 

"Well, my niece just moved down here from Maine, and doesn't know anyone here. She's going to have a birthday a week from Friday... 

"UNCLE EVEN, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU." Delicious stormed away. 

"Now, where was I? Oh yes, we are going to have a tiny birthday party for her. I don't know any young men in this area. I saw no rings on your fingers and I hope I do not embarrass you by asking if you are unattached. I saw the way you looked at my niece, and there was definite interest. She will be seventeen one week from Friday. She has never been allowed out on a date, and she will not be allowed out this time either. I was hoping you could come to my home, enjoy an evening talking with her, possibly teaching her how to dance, and having some food with a few of my friends. Are you at all interested Mister Apple?" 

"What time would you like me here sir?" 

"Is 7 o'clock convenient for you?" 

"I will be here at 7 o'clock." 

"Thank you, may I call you Duncan?" 

"Yes sir, please do." 

"My name is a little funny; it is Even; Even Luck. My nieces name is Delicious, Delicious Mark. She is a very bright young woman, but she has no idea what goes on outside that fence, or what went on outside of her home in Maine, because of the way her family raised her." 

"I understand sir. I will keep the discussion as light as possible. She is truly a beautiful young woman." 

"She is a beautiful young woman, with a short temper, and a very strong right cross to along with it." 

"Yes Mister Luck, thank you for the invitation." 

I watched as Duncan drove the truck clear of the property and closed the gates to the compound. I held my head in my hands and said, "What the fuck were you thinking Even? She is going to kill you." 

I put on my happy face to cover the fear I felt inside, and marched into the house. I yelled out, "Are we, or are we not going for a ride in our new cars?" There was no reply. This was not a good sign. Should I check the steak knives, or take a chance that Delicious would be reasonable? Let's be safe, check the steak knives first. All twelve of them with there. 

I walked up the flight of stairs and knocked on her door. There was no answer. I knocked again, harder and louder, and still there was no answer. I pressed the lever down and the door opened. Upon initial inspection she was not in her room. I checked the closet, under her bed, behind her desk, and behind her drapes. She was not in her room. In a 3600 square foot two-story house, I had a lot looking to do. I was about to divide and conquer the upstairs when I said to myself, "Idiot, she's in the lab." She was. 

When she heard me approach her she said, "Don't touch me. I am so angry with you I will rip your fingers off if you touch me." 

"Are we going to talk like adults, or are you going to pout like a child?" 

"You pimp me out on a date, and you are calling me a child?" 

"I did not pimp you out on a date. I set up a meeting between a boy and a girl approximately the same age. You are not leaving this house. Rod, Roz, the children, and I will be here celebrating your birthday. I explained the rules quite clearly to Duncan. I told him you have never been out on a date, and have no experience conversing with a member of the opposite sex. He knows to expect nothing and in return he is getting a glass of milk and a slice of cake. If you feel that it makes you a whore because of that exchange, you think very little of yourself." 

"I have never acted normal around a boy." 

"Did you hear what you just said? You have never 'ACTED NORMAL' around a boy. Consider this part of your attitude adjustment period. You are changing the way you speak. You are changing the way you behave; and now you have to start changing the way you relate to young men. You are no longer allowed to ACT the way my sister taught you to ACT. Your mother made you project yourself in a manner that kept you, and your body safe from abusive men. You no longer have to act that way. You are SAFE from all predators, especially the one that lived in your home. You will always be SAFE, because I am here for you. Rod is here for you, and Rosalynn is here for you. You will never be abandoned by any of us. You will always have a wonderful protective home. Three adults will protect and care for you at all costs. You will never have to worry about money. Rod has opened a checking account for you with $5 million in it as a safety net, if anything was to happen to me, and my Will gets stuck in probate. The checkbooks are in the top left-hand drawer of your dresser. I let Rod put them there so he could smell your panties." 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 03



"Uncle Even that's gross." 

"Delicious the point is you will never have to depend on anyone for anything ever again. You will never have to touch that money as long as I am alive. Let it sit there and grow. Now is the time for you to begin to grow also, and start behaving like a normal seventeen-year-old young woman. You just graduated high school, go have some fun." 

"You don't want much from a girl who lost everything seven weeks ago, do you Uncle Even?" 

"Beautiful girl, what I want is irrelevant. You should strive for what you want out of life. Besides dreaming about being sexually active one day, what else did you dream about being while you were stuck being a person you weren't?" 

"I know you are going to continue using sexual innuendos in every sentence, until next Friday, so I am going to ignore them, because it is a sign of your diminishing mental capacity. However, while I was locked away I always remember with Doctor Werner von Braun said when he retired from NASA as far as our rockets are concerned. "We will never reach the stars if we continue using liquid to fuel our rockets." He said that almost 40 years ago and we are still using Liquid Hydrogen, with a Liquid Oxygen exciter. 40 years and not one-step forward in propulsion drive to get us off this planet. That's what I want to do. I want to change that." 

"I think it was absolutely wonderful that you can keep thoughts of sex, and bouncing around on the moon going on in your head at the same time. It shows you that your teenage brain is functioning normally. All you have to do now is let one part of you catch up with the other." 

"You make it sound so easy Uncle Even." 

"That is the reason you are meeting Duncan in a safe atmosphere. He will not try anything and you can't relax, talk, and dance." 

"I hope you are right, otherwise I am going to put him down." 

"You are not going to give that boy a blow job on your first date." 

She hit me in the chest with a right cross and I staggered backward. 

"Uncle Even, you are disgraceful. I said I was going to put him down, not go down on him." 

"It must be the battery in my hearing aid. My niece keeps telling me that I'm old and feeble." 

"You're full of horse poop Uncle Even!" 

"Damn, I was sure the pretzel jar was going to get another ten dollars out of that one." 

"Someone once told me 'that in life, always expect the unexpected." 

"Whoever it was sounds like a pretty smart fellow." 

"He reminds me of it every day, hundreds of times a day." 

"You better hang around this person, he really knows what he's talking about." 

"I'm going to need an industrial size bullet to break open that old Windbag." 

"You are supposed to be nice to the elderly, and the infirm." 

"Stop it, Uncle Even, I'm running out of elderly jokes." 

"Just think, after you go down on Duncan, you'll know more." 

"I am not going down on Duncan. I said I was going to put him down." 

"I wonder if my old camera still works?" 

Delicious screamed, as I ran around the lab. She was right on my heels this time and there was no getting away from her this time. I did the only thing the smartest person in the room could do; I dropped a set of car keys on the floor. Two feet continued running as fast as they could, while the two other feet stopped instantly. 

She yelled, "This doesn't mean you're getting away with anything Uncle Even. I will find a way. Retribution will be mine." 

I got into my elevator, and started up to the main floor. I yelled, "Dummy, the quotation is, Vengeance is mine says the Lord." 

Delicious screamed back at me, "It still means you are going to get your ass kicked Mister." 

I was at the front door, on my way to my new car, and I yelled, "That's $10 please, I'm going for lunch. I'll see you later." 

I didn't wait for reply. I punched the button on my remote to find out which Q7 was mine, and ran for it. I opened the door to get in, as Delicious ran out of the house. 

I yelled, "Don't forget to lock up." 

I smiled because her reply cost her thirty dollars. She turned, and walked back into the house. She walked out moments later, locked both deadbolts, and put the keys in her purse. 

I backed out of my parking space and waited for her to pass me by. I knew she was livid, and I enjoyed that feeling greatly. Watching her grow up was going to be a pleasure. 

She passed my open window with a sullen look on her face, and said as loud as she could, "I HATE CHEATERS." 

I opened the first gate and started moving slowly towards it. As my open window faced hers I yelled, "Don't Forget, Give Duncan A Kiss For Me." 

Her tires left rubber in reverse. 

I smoothly moved my car in to the second gated area and closed the first. She was behind me, with her head out the window, advising me of the bones in my body that would remain unbroken. When she finished, the orbital bones of my eyes remained intact. Whoever taught her human physiology had done a very inclusive job. 

I opened the front gate, and watched the posts descend into the ground. I attempted to miss the potholes, but was unsuccessful, as usual. I waited for her at the stop sign at Spring Gulch Road. She pulled up alongside she said, "I'm hungry, where are we going for lunch?" 

She never ceases to amaze me. She could be angry with me for a dozen reasons, all of them vital to her interest. However, when she was hungry that was all that mattered. Everything else could be taken care of later. Her brain was now focused on one thing: FEED ME! 

We had a sushi restaurant in Idaho Springs she liked a lot. However, every time she walked into the restaurant the chef had terror written all over his face. He became uncertain if he would have enough salmon remaining for his dinner patrons. 

As my friends from the alphabet company promised, they called Saturday evening to check on her progress. After ten minutes of speaking to her on the phone they were satisfied that she was doing well. 

When they spoke to me they asked if she would be ready for testing in three weeks. I told them honestly I was not sure, but to leave a space open for her just in case she was. Delicious was going to change the way they tested prospects and adjust scores when they finished with her. 

They agreed to leave a space open. 

******************* 

Rod had to be at the Outpatient facility at 6:30 AM for his 8 AM procedure, which meant they had to leave home at 6 AM. Delicious decided to sleep over Tuesday evening, rather than get up at 5 o'clock Wednesday morning to go over to their house. She rang the doorbell and Rod opened the door and invited her in. 

Delicious looked around and said, "It's me, Delicious, are you sure you want me to come in?" 

Rod replied, "Get in this house before I send you for the operation in the morning." 

"Rod, are they doing a sex change operation on both of us? If they are, I could really get to fuck you. (She made a mental note to put $10 into the pretzel jar)" 

Rod screamed. "Rosalynn, she's not in the house yet, and she started in on me." 

Rosalynn rushed to the front door, pushed Rod aside, and pulled Delicious in. 

"What did my husband do to you this time?" 

Delicious recounted the entire discourse between the two of them and Rosalynn laughed. 

"Rod, when are you going to learn not to argue with her? If she were not going to be a scientist, she would be a better Debate instructor than I was. Just think about going up against her in a court of law. Any lawyer, not only you, but the best lawyers in the country, would leave the court screaming for help." 

"Are you saying I was not a good courtroom attorney?" 

"Absolutely not Rod and you have proved that time and time again when you have had to defend Even and his patents. You did not give the other attorneys a chance to breathe. I sat there and watched you, and you were brilliant. I am just saying that this young woman is at the top of any list, and she is only 17 this Friday." 

Delicious asked, "Did my deranged uncle tell you what he did to me for this Friday?" 

Rosalynn put her arms around the young girl and said, "Yes, he did. I am coming over Friday morning, and removing all sharp instruments from your house." 

"Can we talk after you bring Rod home?" 

"Absolutely, the doctors say he should be sleeping for several hours after he arrives back at the house." 

"Good, I will have the kids run around all morning so they are exhausted, and need a nap. It will give us some time alone." 

Concerned, Rod asked, "I might be able to stay up for a little while after we get home, would you like me to sit in to give you a man's point of view?" 

Delicious replied, "Thanks Rod, but I think I'd like to talk to you after I speak to Duncan. Do you have anything Sunday afternoon? The computer is down all day, and normally I am free." 

"I should be fine by Sunday, so I will take you to lunch, and we can talk." 

********** 

Rod and Rosalynn left a little early, but Delicious was at the door to wish him good luck. 

Rod looked at her and grunted. Rosalynn smacked him on the back of his head and told him to be more polite to their guest. 

"It's not you Delicious, and it's not the operation, which is nothing. I can't stand the thought of someone holding onto my dick and shaving my balls. It terrifies me." 

In her normal jovial tone, Delicious said, "Don't worry about it Rod, after today your balls will be useless anyhow." 

As Rod tried to reach for Delicious' throat, Rosalynn stepped between them. "You have no idea how wrong you are. After you are introduced to the pleasures of sex you will find that those two magic marbles are more than just baby makers. They make men and women reach heights of sexual pleasure you have yet to dream of, and I would miss them sorely if they disappeared." 

Rod put his arms around his wife and hugged her. 

Delicious looked at them and realized that they were both in agreement when it came to his testes. She said to them, "I'm sorry I said that. We have to talk, because I had no idea that they had any other purpose. I didn't realize they brought pleasure to the man or the woman. I just thought they were there to produce the sperm that was needed fertilize the ovum. I feel like an idiot." 

Before Rod could say a word, Rosalynn elbowed him in the stomach, and he folded in half. 

"Rosalynn that was not fair. She left herself wide open, and I was just about to run through it for a touchdown." 

"Yes dear, I know. However, you would never hear the end of it, as you lost argument after argument with her, for the rest of your natural life." 

"What makes you think I would lose all of them?" 

"Rod, I have to take you to the Doctor for a procedure. I don't want you going there sulking. Just say goodbye and we will see you later." 

Rod looked at her and said, "I will see you later Delicious. Let the kids sleep as late as they want." 

As she was closing the front door Delicious said, "I got your back coach. Just remember what happened at school the last time." 

Rosalynn gasped when she heard Delicious' remark, but said nothing. 

Rod buckled himself into the car and said out loud, "I was never her coach at school." 

Rosalynn put the car in year and headed for the hospital outpatient clinic leaving her husband to mull over Delicious' latest puzzle. She had to have her bladder checked, because if she started laughing, she would have to get herself to the bathroom very quickly. 

*********** 

By 9 AM all the children were fed, washed, brushed, and dressed. Delicious said, "Colonel Jeffrey is everyone here?" 

Jeffrey responded, "Yes General Delicious, everyone is accounted for." 

"Good job Colonel. Do you remember the last time I said the next game would be more fun than the last one?" 

"YES!" 

"Okay, here's what we have to do. Your dad's having an operation right now. There is a certain area on his body were not allowed to touch until he gets better. For practice, I'm going to put it on me. There is one thing you can do that will make him laugh. Do you see these little white balls with the red marks?" 

"YES!" 

"You can throw these balls and hit the area inside the rectangular target. I'm going to give each of you a bag containing 6 balls. If your ball hits inside the target area you keep your score from 1 to 6. Do you understand?" 

"YES!" 

"Are we ready to practice?" 

"Hell yes!" 

"Who said that? 

Little Rod raised his hand, "ME." 

"I will talk to you about your language later. Each of you pick up your package of balls, and remember, when Colonel Jeffrey says, "Play Ball," you start throwing and only the hits inside the rectangle count." 

Colonel Jeffrey, I am ready. 

"Troop, Play Ball." Balls went everywhere except inside the rectangle. The barrage took less than 30 seconds to complete and when Delicious looked at her amassed Army they were all dejected. 

She said, "Hey guys that was only the 1st practice. We get to do it over and over again until your dad comes home. Pick up the balls and tell me when you're ready." 

Happiness regained control over five little children and one-one year old, who had no conception of what was going on. He was eating one of the foam balls and enjoying it. 

"Play Ball." Another barrage of balls was thrown with the same result. The kids practiced for half an hour, with Delicious telling them how wonderful they were getting at this game. Finally, after their last practice throws Delicious called them together. She told them their father was going to be so proud of them when he walked in the door and they greeted him this way. He would put on the funniest faces they had ever seen. She would take pictures so they could look at them and laugh at them forever and ever. The children were wild with enthusiasm. 

At 10:45 AM Delicious heard the car drive up, and yelled, "Colonel Jeffrey get your army ready." 

The children grabbed their bags and lined up in the hallway ready to take aim at their father. 

Rosalynn walked in first and knew something was wrong. There was a rectangle suspended in the middle of the entryway 2 feet off the floor, and her children will lined up like soldiers again. 

She looked at Delicious, shook her head. "Oh no, not again." 

Rod walked took his first step into the house. He was confused by the rectangle but fear struck him when his eldest son yelled, "Play Ball!" 

He saw five baseballs coming his way. He screamed, "No," as he danced around the area trying to avoid being hit by these deadly projectiles being thrown at his groin by his children. He fell to the floor and covered himself up into a prenatal position to avoid any further damage to his body. 

When the barrage was over, his 3-year-old daughter, Lily, climbed onto his body, and asked him, "Daddy was it as much fun as General Delicious said it would be?" 

Rod ruffled Lilies red hair, and asked her if she had fun. 

"Oh yes daddy, we practiced and practiced to get it right just for you. We wanted you to be proud of us." 

"I am very proud of all of you. You put a lot of effort into learning how to do that and you did it extremely well. I think I'll take you all out for ice cream later. How does that sound?" 

"That sounds like fun daddy, not as much fun as throwing the balls at you, but ice cream is fun too." 

Rod yelled, "It's a beautiful day outside, I want you all out there playing." 

There was a mad rush out the back of the playroom door, and Rod attempted to stand up with Rosalynn's help. 

"Where is she? I'm going to kill her. I think I opened my stitches." 

Delicious yelled from the kitchen, "Don't be such a wuss. I'm making coffee. You must be hungry. What would you like for breakfast, before you go to bed?" 

"Pancakes would be nice." 

"How many would you like?" 

"3 or 4 would be filling." 

"Do you want jam, jelly, or maple syrup? 

"Jam please." 

"Coffee is ready, how do you take it?" 

"Just a little cream please 

Rosalynn walked into the kitchen. "Let me give you a hand." 

Delicious replied, "Go sit by the window." 

"Delicious, not again; one day he is going to kill you." 

"No, he enjoys this as much as I do. Go sit by the window, now." 

"Oh God, please protect my house." 

"Coffee is on the table." 

Rod walked into the kitchen sat down, patted Rosalynn on her knee, and thanked Delicious for making his breakfast. 

Delicious was walking over with a plate in her hand, when Rod took his first sip of coffee. He spit it out all over the table. 

Roz asked, "What was wrong with you?" 

"It's filled with sugar." 

Delicious responded, "Didn't you say you liked your coffee like you like your women: Hot, Light, and Sweet." 

"No, I said I like mine with the little cream." 

"I'm sorry Rod I can't help you with a little cum. That's your department, or was your department." 

"I am not going to get into an argument with you over that statement, Delicious. May I have my breakfast please?" 

"Sure." She handed him a plate with four eggs, sunny side up, 2 pieces of toast, with maple syrup, and a small bowl of instant grits. 

She started backing away from the table as his eyes rose up to meet hers. 

"What did I do in my life to deserve you in it? Is there something in my past that I did that was so terribly cruel that I have to be punished here on earth and in hell for eternity also." 

"Do you want to tell him Roz or should I?" 

Having no idea what Delicious was talking about Roz said, "He would never believe me, so you better tell him. I'm not sure how he's going to take it." 

"Roz and I have talked this over and over, and I was not going to tell you, but I think it's better to have it out in the open between you and me. However, you must never tell my Uncle Even. Julius Mark is not my father. Your father raped my mother on the trip down to Cape Cod. He kept his head covered and only said a few words while he did it. My mother scratched him deeply along the collar of his shirt, and drew blood. He took her virginity on the train, and never looked back. My mother saw the scratch marks on his neck when she returned from Cape Cod and she told him about it. She couldn't tell Even because of you. It would've ruined your relationship with each other forever." 

Rod sat there with his hands on his head, and a shocked expression on his face. He looked at Roz, back at Delicious and then back at his wife. When her lip twitched, the game was up. 

He pounded his fist on the table, "I am going to kill you both. You had me hook, line, and sinker, you bitches. Am I truly that gullible? Do I have a sign on me saying 'Please Kick Me.' What is going on with me?" 

"Rod can I tell you something, without you getting angry with me?" 

"It would be a different way for us to start a conversation, wouldn't it?" 

"You're a pussy cat." 

He dropped his head onto the table smashing four sunny side up eggs, maple syrup in his eyes, and grits in his left ear. 

Rosalynn reached for her cell phone and started taking pictures. She was laughing so hard she fell off her chair. 

"Roz, I think we will talk later. Email me the pictures, I'm going home." 

***** 

Post Script: I'm sorry this took so long to get to print. I was in Baltimore talking to a publishing agent who is going to represent me in my quest to get my book published. She has been in the business for 37 years, and if she likes it, I believe my chances are good.



There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 04



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it notated now, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be a few and far between. This is going to be a "SHORT STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.'





There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 04



"That's not possible to do Uncle Even."

"Do you trust me Delicious?"

"As long as you don't spank me I trust you."

"I would never spank you baby; I would enjoy it too much. One phone call to a friend of mine in Glens Falls, and it is done. You must never mention that to anyone."

"Uncle Even why are we still at a gas station?"

"Because you are still standing outside the car."

"Can you remember E-470 S four 27 ½ miles, then Interstate 25 for 203 miles?"

"No, but I have it queued in to the GPS. It will remind me what to do, and went to do it."

"Even did I ever tell you that you don't lie very well?"

"I may not lie very well, but I am a great cheater. Now get in the car so we can start our trip please."

"Bitch, Bitch, Bitch, that's all you do is bitch."

I put the car in reverse while she was still standing at my window, and she screamed, "Hey wait for me."

As she jumped into her seat I said, "Dummy just in case you forgot this trip is all about you."

***********

12. Culture Shock

The trip to Austin was the best of my life. She was an excellent traveling companion, and a captive student. She could not get away from my questions, and when her answers were incorrect, she blew her top after I ridiculed her lack of knowledge. Lack of knowledge; what a joke. Here was a 17-year-old girl with no formal college training talking to me, with a Doctorate in Mechanical Engineering, and 11 years of practical knowledge, and she was keeping me on my toes. I have friends in every area of science. We talk about all the new theories on the cutting edge of every field of study, and this wonderful child was only a few years behind the times. It took everything I had in me not to show her how proud I was of her knowledge.

As we entered the outskirts of Austin, the first thing I did was get the car washed. It looked like it had been in a road rally. It was no longer blue, but desert beige. They had to run it through the wash twice to get it clean, but I put a large tip into the box to make up for the hard work they did on it. It looked brand-new as we entered the University area. That is when I realized the car was quiet. Four 1000 miles, and 16 hours of driving, nearly nonstop, the car held a cacophony of noise. I looked at Delicious and her face was plastered against the side window. She had never seen a college campus, and this one was so opulent she could not get over it.

"Delicious are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine. What do they teach in these buildings?"

"Mostly they teach sex education, these are the dorms. They are coed."

"Boys and girls in the same dorm?"

"This is 2014 baby girl. Moral codes have eased quite a bit since my time in college."

"Even stop the car for a moment, and look at me."

I did as she asked.

"Crap, you're not lying."

"Why don't you get out of the car and go into the dorm and take a look. I'll wait here."

"I would be too embarrassed."

"Get out of the car, walk into that dorm, and see it for yourself Delicious. Consider it a wake-up call. If anyone asks what you're doing in there and tell them you are considering coming here for the fall semester."

"You know I hate you when you're being reasonable."

"Yes I know, and I hate you three times as much. Get going young lady, I'll be right here when you get back."

As she entered the dorm a campus police car pulled up behind me with its lights flashing. A petite female officer got out of the car, walked up to me, and asked if I had car trouble.

I read her nameplate, and replied, "No Officer Cougar, my niece just walked into that dorm to see what it was like. She will be out in a moment."

"Sir, you cannot park here. There are assigned parking spaces for guests about 100 yards down the street. Wait for her there."

"How is she supposed to know that is where I am, without panicking? She is only 17 years old; and never been away from home. What is the fine for parking here?"

"$1000."

"Do I give the cash to you, or do I give it to the Bursar?"

"If you have the cash, I get off at 4 PM."

"I have the cash and much more. Unfortunately, my niece is here to be tested by people who are not here."

"You're late. They had been looking for you since this morning. Since your niece is the one being tested, I still get off at 4 PM."

"That is a delicious offer, but I have to stay with her, because as I said she has never been away from home, and she is scared to death. Here she comes now."

Delicious yelled, "I leave you alone for five minutes and you're picking up a woman already?"

"I see your hormones are running freely. This is Officer Cougar, and she is about to give me a ticket for $1000 because I am illegally parked."

"I can see why the tickets are so expensive Uncle Even. When you walk into the dorm there is a bowl filled with condoms. Boys and girls share rooms. A boy asked me if I would like to join him in his room for a quickie. He was hysterical when I asked him what a quickie was."

Both Officer Cougar and I laughed.

"Uncle Even stop laughing at me, and tell me what a quickie is."

"Officer would you like to take this one?"

"She is your niece; I wouldn't touch that with a 20 foot pole."

"Delicious a quickie is pure unadulterated sex with no foreplay or afterthought. You lie down, spread your legs, he inserts his prick and fucks you as fast as he can. When he's finished it's over. If you have an orgasm so much the better. If not it's too bad for you."

"That doesn't seem fair."

Officer Cougar said, "Oh my God, she's a virgin. Don't let her loose on this campus, she won't last two minutes. The boys can smell a virgin like they can smell a home-cooked meal."

Delicious smiled. "Is that why all the boys were looking at me?"

"Delicious do you remember anything Duncan said to you? He warned you that many young men would be after you because of the way you look, and you have yet to finish filling out."

Officer Cougar said, "You keep calling her Delicious. Please tell me that it is a nickname and not her given name."

"I am sorry to inform you that her given name is DELICIOUS. If you have a brother and they were to get married, she would become a Delicious Cougar."

The officer laughed so hard she had mucus coming out of her nose. I handed her my handkerchief so she could wipe her nose, and compose herself.

"Sir, I have a brother, who is a senior at this university. I can't wait to tell him this story. You have to get on your way now. They are waiting for you in building D118. Follow me and I will get you there quickly."

I had not started the engine when Delicious started in on me. "I thought you had trouble talking to women. You seem to be doing very well with a Cougar."

"That is Officer Cougar young lady. I was stalling for time so you would come out of the dorm and I would be here. She wanted me to move down the street 100 yards. If you didn't see the car you would have panicked. I was only doing it for you."

"There is a high school jingle that goes like this: Liar, liar pants on fire."

"That's a nursery school jingle Delicious. At least I gave you enough time for you to have a quickie."

"Not funny Uncle Even, it's disgusting to think of a man doing that to a woman."

I replied, "For your information, it is not a one-way street. Some women want quickies also. There are certain circumstances when time is of the essence, and an orgasm is needed to let off steam. It helps both sexes let off steam or sometimes just the woman."

"No shit, then actually happens?"

"That will be $10 please. I'm going to buy you a laptop. I don't want you to watch pornography on it, because it will give you a disgusting view of sex. I want you to research sex on it. Start with the Victorian era and work toward through the Kinsey report, up to the modern day. It will probably take you 6 to 8 weeks to go through all that information. The Victorian era of the late 1800s will show you that sex was quite prevalent in the era of clothing that covered women from the neck to the toe. Many high-class women of that time never wore underwear. Their husbands would call them into their library, and close the door. Leaving their wives fully clothe, they would bend them over a table, or put them onto a couch, and have sex with them for hours. The staff knew what was going on but never said a word for fear of losing their jobs."

"It sounds like interesting reading."

"It will blow your mind, just like you are going to blow the mind of the people in this building. We are here; relax and remember to breathe."

**********

I was challenged as I pushed the buzzer at the door. I responded and the door opened automatically.

An oriental woman greeted us in the Cantonese.

Delicious hesitated for a moment and replied in Mandarin.

The woman smiled and said in Mandarin, "Excellent, even your intonation was close to perfect. You will be an excellent student."

Delicious responded graciously.

We walked down a long corridor, passing empty classrooms, until we reached a small auditorium. Grape, I mean Stan was there waiting for us."

"Where the hell have you been Even? You were supposed to be here yesterday."

"Stan would you like to see your email? According to it I am a day early."

He looked at the email and yelled at me.

"Even when are you going to remember we put the day first, then the month, then the year."

"I am not a European you idiot. I live and work in the United States of America. When I read the paper it is month, day, and year. When I turn on my computer it is month, day, and year. When will you assholes realize that normal people don't do what spooks do?"

Delicious said, "That will be $10 please."

"It was worth it."

"Fuck off Even. Ever since that young lady came into your life, you have become a pain in my ass."

"If you think I am a pain in your ass, wait until she destroys your tests. You are going to have a headache that will last you a lifetime."

"We will see about that starting tomorrow. We have 12 people instead of 18 in this class. Six were culled out for moral reasons. IQ tests start at 8 AM tomorrow morning. You will get a one-hour break starting at 12:30 PM and the test will end at 6:30 PM. If further testing is needed, it will continue on the next day. You can go with your chaperones to get something to eat. You can go to the campus cafeteria, or you can eat here at our cafeteria, although I don't recommend it."

Delicious got up to speak to the oriental woman who greeted us. She asked if there was a great, not good, but great sushi restaurant in the area.

Yoki responded, "My father has a Japanese restaurant that has the best sushi in town."

"Would you like to join my Uncle Even and me for dinner at your dad's place? It will be my uncle's treat."

Yoki smiled. "Your uncle is one of the wealthiest men I know. I will never turn down a free meal from him."

I said over Delicious' shoulder, "Are you giving my money away again?"

"You told me not to use the money in my checking account. The only other money I have access to is yours. I am just spreading the wealth around. It's great for the economy."

"I thought you were going to be a scientist, not an economist."

"Working with money is a science Uncle Even. You should understand that by now. Isn't that the reason you purchased that whole city block?"

Yoki coughed. "Even, you bought an entire city block in Denver?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time Yoki. Land values were depressed. Three of the buildings were going into foreclosure and not paying their rent. The Corporation that owned the land needed cash desperately, and I was their white knight. I purchased the land, the rights to what is below it, and the air rights above it. I also purchased the five buildings that are on it. It only cost me $278 million 6 years ago. Since the economy has come back, and the buildings are over 80 percent full, the value on the package is now over $460 million."

Yoki said, "I am going to eat you out of house and home."

"Yoki, I don't know what your salary is, so I will make you a $1 bet. You will not be able to eat as much as my niece can."

"You have never seen me eat."

I smiled and looked at Delicious. "I believe that echo has followed us to Austin."

"You are right Uncle Even. I remember that quote from somewhere in New England."

**********

As I paid the bill, Yoki's father was reprimanding her for bringing someone into his restaurant that ate a complete side of a salmon. He was going to have to have more salmon delivered by express shipping, because his next delivery was not due for three days.

I walked over to Mister Shimomura, and he immediately calmed down. I asked him if he could do me a great favor. He asked me what I needed.

"Mister Shimomura, my niece, and I will be in town for the next 3 to 4 weeks, and she loves sushi. I would expect that we would be at your restaurant at least twice, possibly three times a week. I would like you to make a special purchase of three salmon per week for the three of us. I will gladly pay you in advance for the first three weeks, including all your costs. I only want the best salmon available. If they have blue fin tuna available, purchase it and I will immediately pay you the additional cost plus a stipend for being able to get it for us."

He started bowing to me, and speaking Japanese, which I did not understand one word of it.

Yoki broke it down for me in one very short sentence.

"Even my father would be delighted to take care of this order for you, and he will get you the best that is available on the world market."

"Yoki ask your father if a $10,000 advance will be enough, especially with the price of the blue fin tuna."

Mister Shimomura was a tiny man, but when he grabbed me around my chest in thanks for this order, I thought he was going to break every rib I had. I felt much better when we left the restaurant.

********

At 8 AM the IQ tests started. One student and two testers per room. The door to each room had a small portal of glass. I told Delicious if she ever got nervous to look at that glass, because I would be looking at her every moment she was in there.

At the beginning she must've looked at me every few minutes, but as she got into the testing her head never wavered from the papers or from the proctors face. She knew I was there.

At 12:30 PM a buzzer sounded, and we went to their cafeteria for lunch. I understood why they did not recommend eating there.

At 1:30 PM it started all over again. Delicious had two different proctors, and they were firing questions at her nonstop. She did not seem flustered by this double-teaming, and every once in a while, she would look at me and smile.

When the day was over she was covered in sweat.

"I need to take a shower before we go out to dinner, otherwise I will stink up the place."

"I wasn't going to mention it, but I was going to stand a few feet further away from you if you didn't take a shower."

"Was the air-conditioning broken, or did they keep the room hot for reason?"

"They make the room hot to make you as uncomfortable as possible. The more uncomfortable you are the more mistakes they expect you to make."

"It doesn't work that way with me Uncle Even. I get more pissed off, and I focus better. I forget what's going on around me and concentrate on their questions. They were the ones that got angry, because they could not get me to make mistakes."

"What did I tell you before we started the trip down here?"

"Do you want the entire list of things you told me?"

"There's a list?"

"Yes, and it is a very long list. Relax, breathe, concentrate, and don't let them upset you, because you are going to make them rewrite this test."

"That's the one I'm talking about. The others are very important, so are the ones you didn't mention, but I will bet you $100 that you are going to be called back tomorrow morning for more IQ testing."

"Is that all you can think about at a time like this; taking my money away."

"Why not, you are rich."

"You told me not to touch that money."

"I'm talking about the money in the pretzel jar. There's $20 of my money in there, no there will be $30 in there now. It should give you an incentive to win this weeks' lottery."

"Speaking of the lottery, I can't play because I'm only 17. I have a group of numbers that I think will win not only the lottery but the Powerball lottery. Will you play them for me?"

"What do I get out of it?"

"You get the honor and privilege of getting your picture in the paper, kissed by Miss Colorado, and pay local, state, and federal taxes on the money I win."

"Delicious somehow I feel that I would be getting the short end of the stick on that deal. However, since the money would be given to me, and not to you, I may be able to work something out with you as a fair and equitable agreement."

"Even somehow I feel I would be getting the short end of the stick on that deal."

"There is that damn echo again. Take your shower I'm hungry."

"Dammit, that's my line."

*******

The following morning only two people were held over for additional IQ testing. Delicious was one of them. The others were sent for skills training in areas they showed promise in. It was the same drill as the day before, only the testing was more severe, and the room seemed hotter.

By 10 AM the proctors had their jackets and ties off, and their shirts were soaked with sweat. Delicious looked at me for a brief moment, and I hand signaled her I would be back in 15 minutes. She nodded her head and continued with her testing. I ran back to our rooms and took out her short pink outfit, bra, panties, socks, and sneakers. I also took a towel and her toiletries. I stuffed them into her backpack and returned to her testing center.

At 12:30 PM she walked out of the room dripping wet. She said, "I'm starving and I need something cold to drink."

I said, "You have to go to the bathroom, URGENTLY."

"Even, I need something cold to drink."

I handed her the backpack and said, "Baby girl go tinkle, and I will get you something cold to drink."

"I hate you Uncle Even."

"I know, and I hate you three times as much."

She walked into the lady's room, pissed off at me, as usual.

I ran to the cafeteria, purchased a large Root Beer, and walked back to wait for her.

10 minutes later a youthful new woman walked out of that room and smiled at me.

"That was a very long tinkle Niece Delicious. Here is your Root Beer."

"I don't like Root Beer, you do."

"Oh yes, you are correct. I guess I'll have to drink it." I took along deep swallow, while she stared at me.

"Uncle Even that was mean."

"I can tell it was mean just by looking at you."

She looked down at herself and grinned. "You know how much I hate you when you do this to me."

"Yes, but I think we should get you something to eat and drink to go along with your sexy new outfit and go back to testing."

***********

She breezed through the remainder of the afternoon session, but it was not so for her proctors. The temperature in the room must have been in the low 100s and they were perspiring through their shirts. At the end of the day they were exhausted, and her body glistened.

"I believe you made enemies today Uncle Even."

"Trust me my dear; it is not the first time I have pissed them off, and it will not be the last. However, they need me much more than I need them."

"It sounds like an ideal relationship."

"It certainly is."

At 8 o'clock the next morning we were taken to a different building where I was told to sit down, and they were taking Delicious to another area.

Delicious screamed, "No. I am not going anywhere without my uncle."

"Miss Mark, he cannot be there for this interview."

"In that case, I'm leaving now."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 04



I stood up, took her by the hand and we started walking towards the exit. Two armed guards blocked our exit.

I asked, "Are we under arrest, because if we are I want to know the charges, and I want my phone call immediately."

"No sir, you are not under arrest. We have been asked to detain you while a decision is made on your niece's request."

"Tell the person who made you detain us they have one minute. After that I am going to sue them both personally and collectively through the United States government for every penny I can get."

The guard talked into his sleeve and then let his hand return to his sidearm. I looked at my watch and one minute passed. I looked at Delicious and said, "Do not worry about me. I have left instructions with Rod. If he does not hear from me by tomorrow morning at 9 AM he will file a Writ of Habeas Corpus for you. There are many reasons for having GPS locators in a car. This is one of them. He knows exactly where we are down to the square foot. These people can start running but they can't hide forever. We have talked to Officer Cougar, who delivered us to this building. She works for the college not for them. The other children they have here testing have parents. They are not going to kill all of them to try and get away with you. I love you as if you were my own. Take my hand, they will not harm you, they may or may not kill me."

"Even don't do this."

"I will not allow them to hold you captive. I have seen and heard about their horror stories. It will not happen to you. I will not allow it to happen."

"God dammit Even you are a pain in my ass."

"Go fuck yourself Stan; you are not going to harm this child. I told you that at the beginning. I told you I would not be separated from her. So what is the first thing you try to do you try to do; separate us. You are a fucking idiot if you thought she or I was going to allow that to happen."

"I never thought you had the balls to put your life on the line for someone else."

"That's because you don't have balls at all Stan."

"Both of you come with me, the chief wants to see you."

I'm not sure how many hallways this building had, but I believe we traversed all of them. Finally, Stan stopped and knocked on a door marked, "Janitorial Supplies."

Stan looked at me. "The boss wanted it this way, because when the shit hits the fan, this is where it ends up."

Someone yelled, "Are you going to stand out there forever, or you going to come in here soon?"

Stan sighed, "Oh God, he is in one of his rare moods."

Stan opened the door and the three of us walked in.

"Good morning Director Meil; this is Doctor Even Luck, and his niece Delicious Mark."

"Good job Stan, you didn't even trip over your tongue this time. You can leave now."

"Thank you sir, it will be my pleasure to leave this room, close the door, and run to the nearest bathroom."

The Director laughed at Stan's remark. "I'm really not as bad as Stan made me out to be. It's just that this job sucks, and all of us who are involved in it know it. We get no praise. All we get is in trouble when we screw up. That is why we recruit only from the top .5 percent of the country to do this work. Sometimes even that group of people get in trouble because they're not bright enough. Should I call you Miss Mark, or Delicious, because I will only be talking to you?"

"What is your first name Mister Meil?"

"My first name is Robert."

"You may call me Delicious, if I can call you Robert."

"That works well for me. Delicious. Do you know what your IQ is?"

"Yes Robert, it is 183."

"Delicious whoever tested you is an idiot. The first time we tested you it came out at 204. We knew it had to be a mistake so we tested you again. It came out at 207. We watched you from five camera angles to make sure you weren't cheating. In that pink outfit of yours, there was no room to hide anything to cheat from. If your proctors were sweating before the afternoon exam started and the heat in the room was set at 103 degrees, when they saw that outfit we could have turned off the heat and it still would've been in the low 100's.

We gave you the advanced course in Mandarin to study at home without the benefit of an online teacher to help you through it. In less than three weeks you have an excellent working knowledge of the language. If we put you in a classroom setting for two months you would be an expert in speaking the language, and have a rudimentary knowledge of writing it. However that is not where your talent lies. You are like your uncle and everything points to science and math. It pains me to tell you we cannot use your talents here. You are by far the brightest student to come through this school, but we need a different type of talent. We need IT geeks, computer wizzes, and every other type of person on the leading edge of current, and advanced technology. What we see you doing in the next 3 to 5 years is bringing new technologies into the marketplace. We want it first, before anyone else gets a whiff of it. Go home and be a 17-year-old girl with a brilliant mind. Help your uncle bend radio waves. Yes Even, we know all about it, because you didn't have your windows wired for sound. They are being wired as we speak."

I looked at Director Meil and told him there is no way anyone was getting into my property, no less into my house, without setting off the alarms.

He smiled at me, and lowered the lights in the room. A satellite projection appeared on the screen to my left. He zoomed in closer and closer, until I recognized the area of Idaho Springs. He panned along Interstate 70 until I recognized my home. Both gates were open, and four white vans were parked by the garage. I could see men bringing material into the house, and air compressor was sitting by the front door. Other building materials were lying on the driveway.

Positively stunned I asked, "How did you circumvent all my security measures?"

"Even for a very smart man, sometimes you're so naïve. Who put in all those high-tech security systems?"

After thinking for a moment I said, "Oh fuck, you did after you finished blasting the rock out for the laboratory, you also blasted for the lines to be buried four feet underground. You ran them through one inch-thick, six inch round steel conduits, which ran from the house straight to the junction boxes that control the gates and the pneumatics that control the posts. How could I have forgotten that?"

"Very easily Even, because as you told your niece: we need you more than you need us. We have to protect you, so you can help us. We want the technology you are working on before you test it for Boeing, Northrup/Grumman, and the rest of the military industrial complex. Just think about what we will be able to do with it in North Korea, and Russia's military bases on the Kamchatka Peninsula. We can't hear a peep around those damn mountains. We can see everything from satellites, but it would be wonderful to know what they're talking about at those secret bases."

I said to Delicious, "You must remember one thing when you are in buildings where spooks work: you may not see them but there are microphones and cameras everywhere. You can't fart without them knowing about it."

Delicious looked shocked. She turned to the director and asked, "Does that mean you watched me change in the bathroom?"

"No, only women have access to the cameras for the ladies rooms. It is a violation of federal law for a man to have access to those cameras, and vice versa."

"Even you told us she was special, and she is. You told us she was going to blow our tests away, and she has. Take good care of her; only God knows where she is going to take this country when she grows up."

"She has already told me director. She wants to take us to the stars. She wants to fulfill another scientist promise and get us out of this atmosphere without using a liquid propellant. If I were you director, I would not bet against her."

"Would you like me to call a friend of mine at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory at Caltech?

"Why don't we just do it as an interview Robert? I don't think she's ready to leave the nest just yet."

I peeked over at Delicious, and saw her slip down in her chair.

Robert picked up the phone and made the call.

"Good morning, can I speak to Doctor Deke Oyster, please. This is Director Robert Meil from the University of Texas at Austin calling."

After a moment's delay we heard, "Hello you old bastard, I haven't had a good Meal in months. How are you doing Robert?"

"I knew I should have gone back to eating clams. Oysters always give me heartburn."

"Did you call me to ruin my day? It's only 7:15 here."

"If you were looking at what I am looking at you would be pointing up, all the way up."

"You know Robert, for an old man, you are still a dirty old man."

"Deke I am not dead yet, and until I die I will look. I want to send her out to you for interview. I want your hands tied behind your back and that other thing of yours in a jockstrap. She is only 17 years old and we just finished testing her. Her IQ is between 203 and 207. Science and technology is where she shines. I can't use her here, but I have a feeling you guys are going to love her out there. She is Even Luck's niece, and apparently brilliance runs in the family. When do you have an opening?"

"Hell, I can give 10 minutes to anyone at any time."

Delicious yelled, "Go eat yourself Oyster. I won't go 1200 miles for 10 minutes with God."

"Are you sure there is a God?"

"Do you want to discuss it over the phone, or after I tell you that your figures on the Milli-Newton Thrusters are wrong."

I swear I saw smoke coming out of the speaker of Robert's telephone, as he nearly fell off his chair laughing.

"What do you know about my thrusters?"

"I will tell you this much Deke. With all the thermal sheeting in the world wrapped around them, when it gets to -400 degrees centigrade they won't work because your figures are all wrong."

"Where are you getting your information you insolent pup?"

"My Uncle Even has a tiny computer in his laboratory. When he's not using it to help save the world, I use it to help other people not waste the governments tax dollars."

"Well Princess, we have big computers that crunch big numbers and they come out with the correct answers."

"My uncle only purchased this one five months ago. It is named after a big tree. It's called a Sequoia, and it's made by IBM."

"The Sequoia's just hit the market. How did he get one so fast?"

"He paid cash."

Oyster yelled, "Even if you can hear me, I hate you and your checkbook."

"Deke shut up. Would you like us to send you her findings, or do you want to wait another year for your computer to find the errors?"

"Would you put it on a disk or flash drives and send it to me."

"She founded it Deke, not me. You will have to ask Delicious nicely."

"Delicious, what in the world is delicious?"

I believe she was ready with this answer since the day she was named. "It's definitely not an Oyster."

Robert laughed. "Deke, I see a warm and loving working relationship between Delicious and you."

"Robert her name is Delicious?"

"I have all the documents here to prove it Deke."

I said, "Deke her last boyfriend's name was Duncan Apple. I told her if she was serious about him, and they got married she would become a Delicious Apple."

"Even you're pulling my leg."

"Deke, God should strike me dead where I stand if I'm lying."

"Okay, I am defeated. How about a week from Saturday at 11 A.M. I'll tell the guard where to send you. Caltech is a bitch to get around."

"Send me an email of the campus grounds, one look and she will know it backwards and forwards."

"She's photographic?"

"Both ways, she is an amazing child. Please remember, she is a child. So put that thing of yours in a holster, or I will cut it off."

"Okay, I will keep it under control. I will see you in a week."

**********

7 AM we were in the car heading north and the mouth that roared started in on me.

"What is your IQ?"

"It's higher than yours."

"Give me the number please, I have to know."

"Were you going to tell me the color of your panties?"

"No I was not; it was too personal."

"My IQ is too personal to me."

"It's lower than mine, isn't it?"

"It's higher than yours."

"The vein in your neck is pulsing, which means you are lying."

"The vein in my neck is pulsing, which means I am alive."

"Why are you a pain in the ass all the time?"

"I am a pain in the ass, because I inherited a niece who made me this way. Stan keeps asking me why I am like this. If you remember he said I was not this way before you came into my life."

"You have never been as happy as you are now, and it's all because I am here. You put your life on the line because you love me. It also means you like me. It means you like having me around, because I make you happy. It means you enjoy being happy. If I had been a few minutes later, you would've had a date with Officer Cougar. She might have been the lucky woman to break your cherry, and I would have been the only virgin in our household."

"Are you sure you don't want to go back to the coed dorm and have a Quickie?"

Delicious laughed. "I know I was appalled by the thought of that kind of sex between two people, but did you see the way Officer Cougar blushed when you asked her to explain it to me?"

"How old did you think Officer Cougar was?"

"I thought she looked about 28."

"The way she was talking to me and giggled when I asked her if I should give her the $1000 in cash, instead of the bursar; I would say she is under 25. I believe she thought I was propositioning her for sex with that money."

The cell phone rang, and I pushed the button on the steering wheel to have it go on speaker.

"Hello."

"Did you bury her in the desert?"

"No she is sitting right here beside me Rod."

"Good morning Rod, I will think up something special, on the way home, just for you."

"You don't have to, I received it yesterday, and I've been thinking about it all night wondering what to do about it."

"What did you get yesterday Rod? What is going on?"

"I received a letter from the lawyer we retained in Maine for the sale of the property of your parents' house and effects. They found some personal items they want us to look into and make decisions on. The attorney was very circumspect as he was talking to me about it. Even something is not kosher up there. I can feel it in my bones. I'm going to fly to Maine to see what's going on. Don't call me, and I won't call you. I will leave you messages on your home phone. Go somewhere, just don't go home, and don't tell me where you're going. Take a bunch of cash out of the bank and live on that. I will be leaving late this afternoon. You can take money out of the bank until 10 AM tomorrow morning at the latest. I will leave you the first message by 12 PM Eastern time tomorrow."

"I always wanted to go to Las Vegas."

"Even you hated Las Vegas, and we've been there."

"Delicious didn't my lawyer just tell me not to tell him where I was going?"

"Yes uncle, I heard him clearly tell you not to tell him where you are going."

Rod said, "You know at a time like this I hate both of you equally."

"Rod, at a time like this we both love you equally. We will dream up something for your children to make you proud of."

"Delicious stay away from my children. They think that you are the best thing since sliced bread, and you walk on water. No one can get little children to act that perfectly in so short a time. Rosalynn doesn't know how you do it."

"It's all in the drugs Rod. It's all in the drugs."

"You have been giving my children drugs?"

I said to my good friend, "Rod sometimes I want to take the top of your head off and make sure there's a working brain in there. I love you like a brother, but sometimes you are as dumb as a post."

"It's her Even, my brain worked fine until I met HER."

"Go do what you do best Rod. Spend all the money you have to, but protect her at all costs."

"Couldn't you have stopped after you said, spend all the money you have to."

"Rod do you remember my friend who works at Scripps labs; the one that's working on cloning?"

"Are you talking about the woman we met in Geneva?"

"Yes, I'm thinking of taking Delicious to her. I want to see if she can make me 6 to 10 copies of the original Delicious."

"I know you're trying to be funny with me my friend, but how would you know the difference between the copy in the original."

"It wouldn't matter to me Rod, but I think you would be able to tell. After a short while, I am absolutely sure you would be able to tell."

Rod screamed so loud I had to lower the volume in the car. "I hate you Even. At this moment I hate you more than Delicious. You have never been this mean to me. That was the nastiest thing anyone has ever said to me. Delicious please hit him for me. I will pay you whatever is in the pretzel jar for the week. Please hit him."

"Mister Laver, how can I hit someone who told me you put checkbooks into my drawer and sniffed my panties?"

"Even you lying son of a bitch. Delicious I have never been in your room. Your uncle is pulling your leg. He's just trying to get me in trouble with you, which I don't need any help doing."

"Uncle Even did you lie to me about Rod putting the checkbooks into my panty drawer?"

"I refuse to answer on the grounds that I might be injured."

Seconds later I was. She turned sideways in her seat and kicked me in the thigh.

I screamed, "Delicious that hurt."

"Even stop lying to me. I am an impressionable little girl."

Rod chimed in, "Remember that Even; she is an impressionable young girl, just like Godzilla is a tadpole."

"I am being nice to you Rod. Do you want me to go back on my uncle's side?"

"Positively not, I have to start packing for my trip to Maine. Make sure you boys and girls have enough money, clothes, and personal items so you don't have to use plastic for at least 10 days. Whatever is happening I will be able to handle it by then."

Delicious said, "Is there anything you have to ask me before you leave?"

"Did you escape from a psychiatric prison or from a home for the insane?"

"Yes, both of them. Do you want the addresses?"

"Delicious, I see why he loves you. I see why my children love you. I see why my wife loves you. I also see why I hate you. It's because you drive me crazy. I will talk to you in the next few days. Have fun children."

Delicious and I both said our goodbyes as we pulled off to the side of the road to make a decision on where to go. Suddenly, she started clapping her hands and bouncing up and down in her seat. 

"Uncle, uncle, can we go see the big hole in the ground?"

"Delicious, I hit that pothole every time I pull out of our driveway."

"No, I mean the really big hole in the ground. The one the meteor made."

"That's only a medium-size hole. If we're going to travel that far, why don't we go see the really big hole in the ground?"

"Is that the one they named the movie after: A River Runs Through It?"

"A River runs through this hole but it's not named after that movie."

"I know, I know, it's called the Colorado River isn't it."

"If you don't stop acting like an eight-year-old, I'm going to start spanking you like an eight-year-old."

"Gee whiz, we have a little more than 1000 miles to go, and you're grumpy already. Do you want me to drive?"

"No you navigate, I'll drive. Which way do we go?"

"US 183 N. for 160 miles."

"And how would you know that?"

"I was reading your map on the way down, when I had nothing to do. Would you like the remainder of the instructions now or later?"

"Later, much, much later if you don't mind. You're giving me a headache."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 04



"It's not like I was asking you for sex or anything. You don't have to give me the headache answer. Boy you are grouchy. Do you want to ditch the car at the airport, fly up to Maine, and see what's going on up there with Rod?"

"The last state in this country your feet are going to be in is Maine. If I have to fly you to Guam so they can't find you, bring your bathing suits honey, because you are going. I don't like it when Rod has a bad feeling. You can joke with him all you want, but his legal mind is as good as they come. If I am edgy, Rod being worried is why."

"Well, let's get this buggy moving so we can see the two holes in the ground. I want to see the circular one first. Will they let me go down to the bottom like in the movie Starman?"

"I believe I know someone who may be able to get your permission to go down there and take a look, but you must behave yourself all the way there, and that includes your language."

"Even you are such a party pooper."

"Yes, I am, and I intend to stay that way until I have you married off to a wonderful young man, or until you are 40. Then you can poop at your own party."

"I think my mattress has a 20 year guarantee on it. That means I will be into my third year of my new mattress."

"Today's generation of rechargeable batteries is both awful and wasteful. Considering the amount of devices women use to attain satisfaction, you may want to look into developing solar or hand rechargeable devices that will help poor women, and women in developing nations achieve the same satisfaction as those in developed nations. You would be seen as the Clara Barton of the Clitoris, the Eleanor Roosevelt of women's Plumbing, the Molly Pitcher of women's Orgasms and Lucretia Mott of Abortion Rights."

"I could do all of that by making something that makes a dildo stay charged longer, recharges faster, and does not add to the population or pollution of the planet."

"You do all four of those and you are looking at the Nobel Prize."

"The next time we passed gas station can we stop so I can get a pencil and some paper?"

"Both items are in the pouch behind my seat. Have a good time, but remember the patent office is east of us in Maryland. So make up your mind. Do you want to see two holes in the ground, or are you going to be finished soon enough to bring it to the patent office."

"I may be finished, but I can't test them in front of you Uncle Even."

"I'll close my eyes."

"You will close your eyes while you're driving?"

"Okay, I'll close one eye."

"Which eye are you going to close? The one closest to me so you can use the other eye to look into the rearview mirror and look directly at me?"

"I didn't even think about that."

"When we started our trip down to Texas do you remember I said you were terrible liar?"

"Yes, I remember you saying that."

"Even, you're not getting any better at it, so start telling me the truth."

"Delicious isn't it more fun for you to catch me in a lie because otherwise you have nothing to say when you catch me cheating."

"That's all you do to me; you lie and cheat. Everything you do is lie and cheat. No wonder I have a complex."

"Yes but there are only six or seven little pimples there."

She yelled, "Where!" She pulled down her sun visor and looked into the vanity mirror for the six or seven little explosions that weren't in evidence. She pulled her skin six ways from Sunday looking for those tiny terrors, and then her motion came to a calm stop.

"Did you just do it to me again Uncle Even?"

"I'm sorry dear I have to turn up the volume on my hearing aids. I can barely hear you. What did you say?"

I cringed and moved as close to the side window as was humanly possible because she screamed, "Did You Do It To Me Again Uncle Even?"

In the tiniest voice I could come up with I said, "Yes."

"I hate you. I will get even with you, and I will make sure you die before I do."

"I think I'll leave you in the bottom of the meteor crater."

"Rod would be a very happy man if you left me down there. Of course Rosalynn would pull your throat out through your spine. Your sister would have a very long conversation with you, before she let the devil have you. I am not sure if there would be enough left of you for the devil to take after my mother finishes with you, but he would have the right of first refusal for the quarks that are left over."

"I knew you would get science involved in this conversation somehow."

"I Still Hate You."

"I Still Hate You Three Times As Much."

"Uncle Even, you need to get laid in the worst possible way."

"I don't know any ways to get laid Niece Delicious. How would I recognize the worst possible way?"

Delicious screamed. "Don't talk to me! Make-believe I'm not here. If I have any more conversations with you I will jump out the window. It is impossible to have a normal, intelligent discussion with a man with so little usable humanity inside him. Wake me up at 11 o'clock and I will drive for the next four hours. Don't answer yes or no, just nod your head, and wake me up at 11 o'clock."

*******

When we reached Albuquerque, I found a large branch of the Wells Fargo Bank and went in with Delicious at my side. The teller was a man and his young 20s, and I wrote out a bank draft for $30,000. He asked for identification which I gave him, and he said it would take a few moments.

Soon afterwards, he rejoined us at the window with the bank manager, and two guards, who stood behind Delicious and me. I asked if there was a problem.

The bank manager said, "You have the wrong account number on this draft. I believe you are trying to defraud this bank."

I asked to see the draft, looked at the account number, and handed it back to him. "There is $13,600,000 more for less, in that account. If I do not have $30,000 in my hands in the next two minutes, this bank will lose not only that account, but the remainder of my accounts which this company currently holds. My name is Doctor Even Luck. You now have less than two minutes to get me my money."

The bank manager blanched. "Doctor Luck, this is going to take us at least five minutes to get that much money together."

I was really pissed off now. "You have 90 seconds to bring me that money, so I can pay my escort her money and be on my way. I am paying her by the hour which means you are costing me money."

Three tellers appeared out of the vault carrying two flats of $100 bills sealed in plastic. Each flat contained $20,000. They cut one open, and removed $10,000 from it and handed it to me. I counted out $8000 and handed it to Delicious. I kissed her and said, "You will leave the same two days open for me next week?"

Delicious played along perfectly. In a sweet southern drawl she replied, "Yes, but the following week I will be in Rome with Thaddeus, and won't be back for two weeks. He is such a bore, but his money is so good. I will call you as soon as I return."

"Don't you dare forget to call me; I will be miffed if you do."

All the men around me watched as Delicious gracefully walked out of the bank. She was swaying her hips like a gentle ocean swell, with $8000 in her pocketbook. Then the men looked at me like I was insane.

"Gentlemen, I watched that young lady come out of her mother's womb. She learned the art of love from the best teachers in Italy, France, and the United States. For two days of her company, $8000 is like purchasing Mona Lisa for a dollar. You will go to your grave, with her face smiling at you."

I walked out of the bank as if I was in a trance. I could feel their eyes following me, and the happiness I felt inside was amazing. There would be a lot of talk going on in the coffee room this afternoon; an awful lot of talk, and it would all be about DELICIOUS.

I filled up with fuel and had the Q7 washed so I could see out the front window. We continued west on US Highway 84, through some of the most desolate areas of the country I had ever seen. Delicious saw it another way.

"Why aren't their fields full of solar panels out here making energy Uncle Even? All this land is laying fallow, and 90 percent of the days are precipitation, and cloud free. Any entrepreneur or electric company could make a fortune out of a minimal investment."

"Would you like to form a corporation with me and do just that?"

"It would not be fair to you, because all the investment money would be yours."

"Yes, it would be my money, but as you say, the return on investment would maximize our profit. You could pay me back from it. The price of solar equipment has fallen through the floor, since the Chinese government has pulled price supports from their companies, and they are folding. US companies are now more than competitive in this field. How many acres of solar panels would we need to make this venture worthwhile?"

"A rough estimate is all I can give you right now Uncle Even. We would have to approach the US Department of Land Management for a low-cost lease on 50,000 acres of land. We would only start out using 10,000 acres for the first array's which would produce 25 megawatts of power for the grid. Environmentalists will come after us tooth and nail for ruining the desert. We will put in writing that we will save three percent of our profits to remove any and all obsolete materials as we upgrade. We can get loans from the state and federal government as a startup corporation up $500 Million. Our out-of-pocket cost will be in the area of $200 million using only US suppliers. This will make the Congress like us, the unions help us, and the manufacturers love us. It will take two years to go through the process of approval; and to pour the first foundations."

I looked over at her and smiled. "I'm very happy that this was only a rough estimate. I would have absolutely hated it if you put any thought into it at all."

"Can I help it if I remember everything I read Uncle Even?"

"No you can't. However, you are going to do all our financial bargaining with our contractors and suppliers. I would hate to be on the other side of the table from you. You would probably know their great grandmothers maiden names."

"What would be so unusual about that?"

This time I smacked her, and she laughed."

600 miles later we left New Mexico and entered Arizona. 470 miles more to the Grand Canyon, but only 395 to the medium size hole in the ground. We passed a sign saying, "Last gas station until Meteor Crater 10 miles ahead."

Out of an abundance of caution I decided to stop and fill up the tank. It turned out to be a good idea, because the little person who was traveling with me went into the store and came out with a hot dog in her mouth a bag under each arm and a tray of sodas. I swear when it came to food she was as good as any Chinese juggler in the world.

She cleaned out the front of the car, and put the new acquisitions in their place. I started getting in to the driver's seat, when she yelled, "Oh no you don't; it is my turn to drive."

"Do you think you can follow the directions properly?"

"Would you like to drink your soda, or wear it?"

"I was only asking."

"There is only one road Uncle Even. It goes West and East. It is called Arizona 64 or Interstate 40. When I see the sign for the next gas station, I will make a right turn and follow the signs to the meteor crater. Would you like to get into the car now?"

"If you're going to have that type of attitude, I am going to have a headache for the next 395 miles."

"It couldn't happen to a nicer guy. Now get in and shut up."

I did, both, not wanting to start a war between us (just yet).

13. Heaven Is Below Us

Something very cold was dripping onto my head, so I moved out of its way. It wound up dripping onto my neck which only made me colder. This was annoying. I turned to my body across the seat, and wrapped my arm around the seatbelt making myself more comfortable. The dam water was now dripping onto my ear. I was returning slowly to consciousness, and did not hear the roar of the engine or the tires on the pavement. I opened one eye, and realized there was no one in the drivers' seat. She was going to get a beating, and I was going to be the beater.

I turned to my right quickly, hoping to catch the offending hand that was dripping water onto my body, but no one was there. Boy was she good. She had taken a three bottles of water from our thermal bag, opened them enough so they would leak continuously, and taped them to my headrest. Regardless of which way I turned in my sleep, I was going to get wet. I tightened the caps on the bottles and looked to see where I was. She left me sleeping in the parking lot of the meteor crater. Then she went scouting on her own.

I went to pay my admission fee, but the man at the window asked me if I was the drunk in the blue SUV.

"Apparently."

He handed me my admission packet, and said, "You are setting a very bad example for your granddaughter."

I was going to kill her, and bury her at the bottom of the crater. She would rest happily there.

I knew she would not be in the theater or shopping for knickknacks. I knew she would be looking to get into trouble, which put her outside looking down into the abyss. I took the elevator up to the top of the exhibit so I could work my way down and not miss her. I walked out onto the landing turned and I heard her immediately. She was giving the tour guide a lecture he would never forget.

"How long have you worked here? Why are you giving all these people the incorrect information about this crater? It was not here over 50,000 years ago. Don't you read the journal, "Science?" It was made by an iron core meteorite between 80 and 130 feet wide moving 10 times faster than a speeding bullet between 20 and 50,000 years ago. Everything you are telling these people went out four years ago. Where is your supervisor I want to talk to him? These people should be given their money back. You are lying to them."

The crowd of 20 people that were in her group applauded. The poor guide asked them to stay where they were and he would find his superior and have him speak to them.

I reached through the crowd, grabbed her by the collar of her shirt, and pulled her to me. "The Constitution guarantees you the right of free assembly. It does not give you the right to incite to riot."

"He was lying to these people. What was I supposed to do, stand here and let him do it?"

"Have you ever heard about writing a letter of protest?"

"Do you think it would have worked?"

"No."

"Why should I waste the time, ink, paper, envelope, stamp, gasoline, and time to do it, while these people are still being defrauded."

"Are you going to be able to solve all society's ills during this trip?"

"No, but I can fix as many as I run across, can't I?"

"Yes Delicious, you certainly can."

The supervisor of the display entered the area demanding to know who was challenging the findings of the exhibit.

I raised my hand and said, "We are."

Your name is?"

"My name is Doctor Even Luck, I am a scientist, and graduate from MIT. This is my niece, Delicious Mark. Everything she told your trainee is absolutely correct, and if you tell any of these people she is wrong I will sue you personally, and the government agency you work for in general."

"Doctor Luck, may we talk about this in private?"

"No, I paid the same admission fee as these fine people here. They deserve to hear whatever explanation you give to me about this incorrect information you are giving out. If you are going to explain to me that this hole in the ground was dug by extraterrestrials using teaspoons, they should hear about it also."

The people around us laughed.

"Doctor Luck we are employed by the Department of the Interior. They prepare our lectures make our brochures and pay for the upkeep of this facility. If you have information that proves what we are saying is incorrect, it is because we are given the incorrect information by the higher ups. Please take it up with them."

"When I return home, I will inform my attorneys to contact you and have you deposed. If you fine people would not mind, please write your names on a piece of paper, and a way for my attorney to contact you; we will give the federal government a headache they will not soon forget."

"Sir, one other thing, I want to prove to my niece that a piece of the iron core of the meteorite is still buried at the bottom of this crater. We would like to take a walk down there. Would you like me to call Mister Beranger, or can you give me permission to do it?"

"You don't have to call sir; we will get someone to escort you to the bottom."

Delicious tugged on the back of my shirt. "Do you know everyone Uncle Even?"

"No dear, but Mister Beranger's name is at the bottom of the greeting card we received with our entrance package. I thought his name was as good as any to use."

She whispered, "YOU CHEATED AGAIN?"

"If you tell him I cheated, you won't be going to the bottom of the crater."

She thought about something for a second, but didn't do anything.

"You are very lucky Uncle Even. Going to the bottom of the crater was more important to me than kicking you in the ankle."

"You used the scientific method and came out with the proper conclusion."

"How did I do that?"

"You are angry with me, as usual, and you wanted to take action. Decision: Kick him. Result: He can't walk. Conclusion: You cannot go to the bottom of the crater. 

New Decision: Take no action now, kick him later."

"You are so much fun to be with Uncle Even. You forgot one other decision I could make."

"What is that my dear?"

"I could kick you while we are at the bottom of the crater."

"I did take that into consideration if you look at my new decision. ' Kick him later.' Later could mean at the bottom of the crater and a group of people would have to carry me up the crater walls."

"I don't like you Uncle Even; you're taking all my fun away."

"And I don't like you Delicious, three times as much."

***************** 

"I am not getting on a donkey. You could put a shotgun to my head and tie it around my neck, and I am not getting on a donkey Delicious."

30 minutes later, I was on the back of the donkey, with my legs tied to the leather straps that led to the stirrups. So far I owed the pretzel jar over $200, and counting. As you can guess, I was not a happy camper. All Delicious could do was laugh. It was her turn to say, "Uncle Even, I love you three times as much as you love me."

My answer cost me $40.

The park rangers did not have to give us a lecture on the strata formations in the rock as we passed down towards the bottom of the canyon to the river. Delicious did it for them. Our guides were smart enough not to argue with her.

She told our group that 95 percent of the rock formations they will encounter come from the Paleozoic Strata except for the 'Vishnu Schist' which has yet to be catalogued properly. The top layer of his called 'Kaibab Limestone' or 'The Bathtub Ring,' which is only 250 million years old. She continued down the entire way until we reached the beach, which she pointed out the different coloration of the rock, which was called, 'Temple Butte Limestone' which was made up of Fresh Water mollusks, clams, and other ancient freshwater fish.

As they untied me from my beast of burden, I ran after my niece, threatening to break every bone in her body, including the orbital bones around her eyes. I had a very good memory for physiology.

The Colorado River was moving slowly, and at ebb tide due to the demand of electricity in Los Angeles, because of the summer heat. As I closed in on her, she turned to the right and dove into the river. She started swimming back towards our encampment. She watched me follow her while I stayed on the shore.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 04



Suddenly she dove under the water trying to make me guess which way she was going. I stopped and waited for her to surface. After a moment she surfaced holding a four-pound trout in her hands. Everyone in the encampment, including the guides looked at her in awe.

"I just caught dinner Uncle Even."

I didn't have time to ask her how she did it. One of the guides did it for me.

"Miss how did you do that?"

"It was easy. I read it in a book when I was very young. It said if you could go underneath the fish and stroke its belly very lightly, it would stay calm, and you could grab it. I stuck my finger into his gills so he could not get away, and here is dinner."

"Could you do that six or seven more times so everyone could have trout for dinner?"

"Do you have a net or something that I can throw the fish into so I don't disturb the water?"

"Throw that one to me, and I will catch it in my shirt. We will rig something bigger for the next one."

20 minutes, and eight trout later, Delicious received a round of applause from the guides and our entire group of intrepid campers. I was so proud of her I forgot why I was angry. I kissed her and told her how wonderful she was.

*********

14. Their World Falls Apart

"Delicious everything you have been doing for the past several weeks has proven to me that you are ready to do work at a higher level than I have been keeping you at. When we get home I want you to work with me on my project of bending radio waves. There will be no more tiny things for you to do. I am sure I have everything correct, but I want you to check everything, from the beginning to the end. If you can find problems with the Milli-Newton Thrusters in your spare time, I want to know if you can find problems with my Bending Radio Waves in your full-time. From this moment on every patent submitted will have both our names on it, and we will share in the profits."

"How angry are you going to get with me when I tell you something Uncle Even?"

"It all depends on what you are going to tell me?"

"I broke your security code to get into the computer, and onto your site."

If looks could kill she was dead, and she knew it.

"Uncle Even please relax and breathe, because that's not the bad part."

"There is that damn echo again. What did you do to my program?"

"I did what you just asked me to do, but I did it before you told me to do it."

I stormed away from her before I killed her. No one, I mean no one tampers with my programs. She had committed a mortal sin, and that was something even God found unforgivable. I was furious with her. I wanted her out of my life; NOW. I did not care where she went or what she did, but she was gone. I was going to put her on an airplane and send her to California without me. Now was the time for her to grow up on her own. I cheated and lied to her about unimportant things to help her grow up, and understand life as it is. Now she would have to find out the rest of it by herself.

I stayed away from the group, and did not eat dinner. She tried to approach me, and I told her to stay away. She started to cry but my heart was ice, and no amount of tears was going to melt it.

As darkness fell and everyone settled down for the night, I started walking up the narrow path to the top of the plateau. I knew I was an idiot for trying to do this in the dark, but I did not care. If I made it fine; if I fell off the side of the trail to my death that was fine with me also. Everything I had hoped for between us had been torn away, because she had invaded my privacy, and no one does that. I never felt so empty in my life.

Nearly 6 ½ hours later I made it to the top; don't ask me how. I was scraped and bruised on every exposed portion of my body. I walked to the parking area and used the keyless entry to open the door. I decided to leave her the car and everything in it. I kept $10,000 on me for traveling money, and left her a note.

"From this moment on, you are on your own. I want nothing to do with you except if you are in a dire emergency and need money. In that case call Rod. I will have him forward it to you. I cannot forgive you for what you did. It was theft of Intellectual Property. I have no room in my life for anyone who would do that to another person. Call Rosalynn and have her forward your checkbooks to you. I wish you well in your new endeavors as long as they do not include me. Even.

I changed my clothes so I would look presentable and waited outside the lodge in hopes of catching a ride to Flagstaff. I was luckier than that. A young couple came out at 6:30 AM and I offered them $200 for a ride to Flagstaff. They said they were not going north. They were going to Phoenix to catch a flight to Miami.

I said, "I'll give you $400 for a ride to Phoenix."

The young lady asked, "Who are you, and are you going to kill us on the way to the airport?"

I laughed, and showed them my identification. "No, my name is Doctor Even Luck. I am a scientist from MIT. I was so involved in studying the rock formations; I was late getting back for the last bus leaving for the airport. If I don't get their by 12 o'clock I will miss my flight to Atlanta. The tour guide has all our tickets, and passports, and if I miss my flight to Paris I am going to get a gun and shoot myself."

She said, "Get in the car Doctor, no one misses a flight to Paris."

I never realized how small a Volkswagen Golf is in the back seat, especially when you're sharing it with luggage. However, that little sucker can move. It not only kept up with traffic on the interstate, it passed many cars that were on it. When we got to the airport, instead of returning it to the rental agency first, they dropped me in front of Continental Airways, and bid me a fond farewell. I gave them $500 and a great deal of thanks. My only problem was figuring out where to go. It was 10:30 AM and I hoped there was a message from Rod at home, so I called. The machine was blank, just like my mind. I had no idea what to do or where to go. I had never been at such a loss for what to do.

I looked at the departure board for the next flight leaving. There was a flight to Minneapolis-St. Paul departing in 40 minutes. If I hurried, I might just make it. Instead of going to the ticket desk, I ran straight to the departure area. It was filled to overflowing. I asked the agent at the desk if there were any seats available. She told me that coach was full and there was a waiting list. However, there are only three people flying first class, but the cost is $1560 one-way. I told her I would take one. I paid cash. I didn't want anyone following me; I wanted to be a ghost.

It doesn't matter what you look like when you're flying first class. You could be wearing a loincloth, and they would treat you like a god. The flight attendants pamper you. They come by every few minutes asking you if you're comfortable if you would like a pillow, blanket, a drink, everything except what you really want, which is for them to open the door and let you jump out. They were so bothersome I had to find something for them to do.

"Miss, could you call ahead and get me the closest connection to Fairbanks Alaska. I don't care what airline, or what class of service. If coach is available fine, if not, I will take first-class. I would like to be off the ground as soon as possible after we land."

"Yes sir, right away sir, is there anything else I can do for you sir, would you like to feel my tits sir."

She scurried to a telephone to speak to one of the officers on the flight deck. One of them would relay the message to the company dispatch. They would call their reservations department, who would look in their computer and find the information I asked for, and reserve a ticket for me until they received my credit card information.

I screwed all this up when I told them I was paying cash.

They agreed to hold the ticket at the departure desk until I arrived. I would have a one hour and five minutes delay to catch the five-hour Delta airlines flight to Fairbanks. I told them it was acceptable. The cost for a coach seat was $954 plus all the extras they could think of."

I got off one airplane walked across the concourse, paid cash for my next ticket, and walked onto another airplane. This must be my lucky day I thought, because coach was not even half-full. Oh how wrong I was. I went to my assigned seat, in the center of a five-seat row hoping to stretch out. On the aisle to my left a silver haired grandmother sat down, said hello congenially, picked up a book and began to read. I smiled to myself knowing she was going to be quiet during the trip.

Then four-year-old precocious Gordon entered the row and sat beside me. Gordon's mother was gorgeous. She was five foot seven or eight, eyes as black as her hair, skin as white as snow, and an hourglass figure. Her name was Jennifer Stars, a single mother, flying to Fairbanks to take care of her family's affairs, because her mother had just passed away.

I asked her where she was from, and she said, "It's a small town you have probably have never heard of just outside Denver Colorado."

"My name is Even Luck. I live in a small town near Denver Colorado. It is called Idaho Springs. It is about 25 miles west of Denver. I bet you my small town is smaller than your small town."

She had a delightful laugh. "My small town is Brighton. It's about 45 miles northeast of Denver."

I said, "My goodness, we are almost neighbors."

Then Gordon jumped in. "Mommy, you are not supposed to talk to strangers. You tell that to me all the time. Gordon don't talk to strangers, they could hurt you, and take you away"

"Gordon, we are on an airplane, where could he possibly take me or you? Why don't you ask the gentleman what he does so you could get to know him?"

Gordon popped up in his seat, looked me in the eye, and asked, "How much money do you have?"

Jennifer yelled, "Gordon that wasn't nice. You never ask someone you don't know about their finances."

"I don't mind Jennifer. I am very rich Gordon. I am a scientist. They called me Doctor Even Luck, but I am not a doctor that you see when you are sick. I am the kind of Doctor that studies science and technology to make things better and easier to use."

"What did you make that made you rich?"

"Stop it Gordon."

"Do you know the headphones everyone uses to listen to music?"

"Yes, mommy has a pair of headphones."

"When you're mommy paid for her headphones some of that money came to me because I invented the technology that makes them work."

"Wow, mommy did you know that?"

"No I didn't Gordon."

For the next 30 minutes Gordon grilled me with question after question. He kept asking me what else I invented, and I told him what I could without going into details. However that was only the beginning of my problems. 

Everyone around us heard me talking to him, and now they had questions they wanted to ask me and I could not say no. All I needed was a white board and felt tip markers and I would have had a class to teach. The only thing that made it worthwhile was the look in Jennifer's eyes. Every time I glanced her way it seemed like she was drinking every word I said in, and I never had this depth of feeling for a woman before.

Finally after nearly four hours of questions and answers I said to the people around me, "Class is dismissed for today. I appreciate all your questions. You may read my doctoral thesis for MIT online anytime you wish."

The flight attendant brought me a can of root beer, and thanked me for making this the easiest trip to Fairbanks she had ever had.

Jennifer said to me, "You are absolutely amazing Even. I have never met anyone as bright as you in as many areas you covered on this trip. Everything from astrophysics to anthropology; you know it all. How did you gain all this knowledge, and still major in one specific field?"

"I have a photographic memory Jennifer. If I see it, hear it, or read it, I remember it. I can tell you now that you should change your shoes, because your right heel is about to break. It may not happen today, or tomorrow, but there is a linear crack on the outside of that heel which will cost you a twisted ankle or possibly a break."

"Why didn't you say something before?"

"I didn't want to seem presumptuous, or make you think I was a pervert looking up and down your legs as probably every man that sees you does. I don't know what is going on with me, but normally I cannot talk to a woman, any woman, anywhere, under any circumstances. My tongue gets tied, I become embarrassed, and I don't know what to say or how to act. I normally just run away and hide. 

I am 33 years old and I have never been on a date, because I am afraid of women. Yet, in the past few days, I have been able to talk to a woman police officer and now to you without any problem. At this moment I have personal problems that I am trying to work out. When I have taken care of them I would like to get to know you better. I was not lying to Gordon when I said that I was very wealthy. I hope that doesn't matter to you one way or the other, but if you wouldn't mind, sometime in the very near future, I would like to call upon you and take you out to dinner so we could talk."

"Well Doctor Luck I haven't had much luck with men in my life. This young man's father took off the day I told him I was pregnant. You would think I didn't have a dollar to my name or a family to back me up. He just didn't want to be tied down to a wife and child. I don't know what you consider 'Very Wealthy,' but I am not on welfare myself. My grandparents left me with a sizable trust fund, and my parents have added to it substantially. I own a few thousand acres of land north of my home in Brighton, most of which I lease to ranchers for grazing their cattle. Some oil companies have approached me to do some research on the land, and I own all the mineral rights below it. So if it's a dinner date you want I think I would like that also. You don't have to worry about a gold digger who is looking for your money, and I don't have to worry about anyone looking for mine."

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"We have already laid ourselves bare as to our finances, how much more personal can we get?"

"Not much, I guess. Why are we both flying coach?"

"It's something my father used to say to me. ' Have you ever heard of an airplane backing into a mountain?"

"Do you realize how awful that is?"

"My father said it, not me."

"If you are going to listen to your father, you should be sitting in the lavatory."

"There are no seatbelts on the commodes."

"Does Gordon always fly this well?"

"He does with a little Dramamine in his milk."

"You are sneaky. Can I have your phone number and address before we land?"

"Give me your cell phone and I'll put it in it."

"How long do you anticipate being in Alaska?"

"The estate is quite large, and I don't know how long the attorneys are going to need to get everything settled. I also don't know how long they are going to need me here to take care of everything. It could be a month, it could be six months. I just don't know."

"In that case I will just keep calling your number when I get back home. One day you will answer, and I will be at the other end of the line. I will ask you when you are available, and we will set up a date."

"I will look forward to it."

"So will I Jennifer; I never thought I would say those words, but so will I."

I said goodbye to Gordon as he weaved his way down the terminal, and shook hands with Jennifer, although I wanted to do more. I watched her as she walked away from me and wondered what took me so long to get to this point in my life. Oh well, I guess better late than never.

I took out my cell phone and called home. There was still no message from Rod. At this point I knew something serious had to be wrong, but I could wash my hands of it, because Delicious was no longer in my life. I realized at that moment I had not thought about her for almost 14 hours, and it felt good.

I had a three-hour delay in Fairbanks. I stopped at a good restaurant and had a substantial meal, while looking out at the bright sunshine of central Alaska. That is when I cognitively realized I was in ALASKA, and I didn't have a coat. I was fine for 100-degree heat in Austin Texas, but I was not fine for 50-degree Fairbanks Alaska. Thank goodness Fairbanks is a joint use airport for the US Air Force. I went into the military store and purchased everything from boots to whiteout goggles.

When the Sergeant, at the register, asked to see my ID, I showed him my drivers' license which said, "Doctor Even Luck."

He asked, "Are you going to be with us long Doc?"

"No, I am going up to Point Barrow to do some research. There's nothing like going to the end of the world to find nothing."

"Yeah, at least you won't get frostbite at this time a year."

"I did this trip once before in January. I swore I'd never do it again, but here I go."

"You know what they say Doc, 'When they have you by the balls, your heart and mind will follow."

"You can say that again brother. You have a good one, and stay warm."

I signed that the electronic pad for the receipt, and what would cost a civilian nearly $2000 to purchase, cost me $730 in cash, and a little conversation. He never asked if I was on a military mission, and I didn't lie by telling him I was.

Fairbanks to Barrow is 504 miles of the worst turbulence you ever want to fly through. The winds are horrendous and the terrain is mountainous. What the hell was I doing here, punishing her or punishing myself? If I was the one that wanted to hide, I should've gone to Los Angeles. There are more people there to surround myself with, and if there is an earthquake there, I could hide under a fallen building, or a building could fall on me. Bouncing around in this fucking airplane is downright stupid, and so was I for being on it. I couldn't wait to get on the ground. When the pilot attempted to land, and the wheels touched, it wasn't once or twice, but three times before he steadied the aircraft on what was supposed to be a runway. Well, anyway we were down, I was out of airplane tickets, I had plenty of money, and no one knew where I was. Now smart-ass, what are you going to do with yourself; buy a pole, and go fishing? You don't even have a laptop with you. Maybe you should find yourself a hotel room for the night so you don't have to sleep outside in a pup tent.

*************

Delicious did not sleep well during the night. She tossed and turned knowing how upset her uncle was with her, and not knowing how to make it up to him. She did not think she had done such a bad thing, because she thought she was helping him. But it all came down to that one saying, she did not THINK! What could she do now to make it better? What could she do to make it up to him? She loved him with all her heart. She loved him as much as she loved her mother, but she let him down, and she had never let her mother down. She had only been with him 11 weeks; could she have destroyed everything in so short a time? She hoped that when the sun came up he would talk to her again.

She must have dozed off but the guides got up and they were yelling that someone was missing. They did their count one more time, and someone was definitely missing.

Delicious jumped out of her sleeping bag and yelled, "Uncle Even where are you?"

There was no answer she called out again, and again, and became hysterical when he did not answer. The guides use their radios to call in help. All the mules were there. Guides checked for footprints going towards the river but there were none. They checked for footprints going down the sandbar and again there were none. They checked for footprints going up the donkey trail and found footprints heading up the mountain.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 05



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it notated now, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be a few and far between. This is going to be a "SHORT STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.'

Chapter 5

15. DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC

As they picked me up off the floor, and wet my face with a cloth, I was still in another world. What had Rod said to me that confused and surprised me so that it knocked me out cold?

Doctor Livingstone was still on the phone talking with someone and laughing. I heard him say, "He survived whatever you told him, and they have him standing up now. I do not think you should tell him it again. It may kill him this time. Hang on I will give him the phone, although I am not sure he is coherent yet."

Livingstone said to his colleagues, "You better put him in a chair; if he falls again he might break some of our equipment."

"Even are you well enough to talk to your friend Rod?"

I said yes, although I was not sure I could handle what he was about to tell me again.

"Rod, I believe I remember what you said to me before, but it is not possible. I never touched my sister intimately. I swear to you on my life than I have never had intercourse with anyone in my entire life."

"Even do you believe in science?"

"Don't ask me a stupid question when you already know the answer Rod."

"I have DNA proof that you and your sister are Delicious' parents. What do you want me to do with these findings? Do you want me to bury them? Do you want me to burn them? Do you want me to burn your sister's diary?"

"Divine left a diary? Did you read it?"

"Of course I read it Even. I will never divulge a word of it, because of our confidentiality agreement. You and Delicious have to read it to understand why she did what she did to both of you. It is a heartbreaking story of unrequited longing and love. You have got to get home to help heal your daughter, before she cracks under the strain of losing you."

"I will call her from here Rod, and ask her to forgive me for being such an ass. I am coming home to be with her forever. Have you told her she is my daughter?"

"No, I believe this is a story for both of you to hear while you are sitting together, don't you?"

"I believe you are right. Thank you Rod, you are still the best lawyer I have ever known."

"I want a raise."

"Okay, as long as you take Amtrak from now on, I will give you one."

"Why do you always have a better answer to one of my simple requests?"

"I am smarter than you are Rod, get used to it."

"I hate you Even; I hate you almost as much as your daughter."

"Hang up Rod; I have to call her."

"Doctor Livingstone, is it okay if I make an outgoing call?"

"It will cost you $50 Even."

I reached into my pocket, took out $500, and handed it to him. "I may be on the phone for a long time. I think this should cover it."

"Even I was kidding."

"Call Barrow, and order pizza for everyone."

I dialed Rosalynn's number and waited for her to pick up the phone. She didn't answer it; Delicious did. She screamed, "Uncle Even is it you?"

"Yes baby it's me. Can you possibly forgive me for hurting you so terribly when you did not deserve it. It was my pride that was hurt baby, you did not do anything wrong."

"Yes I did, and I should have known better. I am sorry Uncle Even. Why are you in Alaska?"

"Would you believe I wanted to learn how to ice fish?"

"Director Meil said you would not know one end of a fishing pole from the other. When are you coming home?"

"There is an airplane waiting for me to get off the phone with you to take me back to Barrow. I will make arrangements from there to Fairbanks, and then the fastest way home."

"I cannot wait to get my arms around you again."

"I cannot wait either sweetheart. Why don't you go over the program while I am on the way home, and see if you can find anything that's wrong with it. Wait until I get there to put any fixes in, okay?"

"Are you sure Uncle Even, I can wait until you come home to do it."

"What are you going to do with yourself for the next few days, while you are waiting for me to get home; sit on your thumbs?"

"Well, since Rod has been away, Colonel Jeffrey and our staff have been making preparations for his arrival."

"Delicious very soon the worm is going to turn; and you are going to be on the receiving end."

"He isn't that good Uncle Even."

"Remember you said that, because one day you are going to regret it."

"What do you know that I do not know Uncle?"

"I am at the tip of Alaska. Rod is in the eastern portion of Maine. Unless he was in Florida we could not be further apart if we tried. He will be the culprit not me. I have to get on an airplane now, and get back to you. Oh one more thing, I have a girlfriend. Good by now"

I took the phone away from my ear, but I could hear her yelling, "Don't you dare hang up on me. Tell me about her."

I said one more word which I knew would inflame her. "NO," and hung up the phone.

I could only imagine how much money she would have to put into the pretzel jar when she got back to the house.

I thanked the staff at the Point Barrow scientific outpost for their hospitality. I asked them if there was anything they needed the government didn't allow them in their budget. Within minutes I had a list of items, and promised them I would see if I could accommodate them with as many of these instruments as possible, within a short period of time.

I climbed back in to that god-awful single engine aircraft. The pilot laughed at me.

"You liked it so much the first time, you wanted to go for another ride, eh doc?"

"I always wanted to perform open heart surgery on myself too. I decided not to do it just in case my hands slipped. Let's get back to Barrow in one piece if possible."

"Doc, I do this round-trip four times a week, and the only thing that happens is I get hemorrhoids. Fasten your seatbelt; it's going to be rough."

He wasn't lying, because as soon as the wheels lifted off the ground, we were hit by a wind shear that tipped the wings 45 degrees. I was very happy I didn't eat anything, while I was on the ground.

We flew much higher on the way back to Barrow, then when we were on the way to Point Barrow. I asked the pilot why.

He asked me if I had ever seen the movie with Anthony Hopkins, where their aircraft was hit by a flock of geese flying over a ridge, while they were looking for a landing site.

I saw that movie, and remembered the result of the geese impacting the aircraft very well. I was happy we were much higher than the local terrain.

After an hour flying time, Barrow was in sight, and our landing was smooth. I grabbed my bag thanked the pilot, paid him, and went inside to find the next scheduled flight to Fairbanks. I didn't get the answer I wanted.

"Sir, the next scheduled flight is the day after tomorrow."

"Are there any charter flights that can take me there?"

"Yes sir, there are several reputable charter outfits that I can recommend. However there is a strong weather front coming in from the southeast, and I would advise you to stay over at least one night."

"Where is the weather service on the airport so I can check in with them?"

"They are co-located with the tower; you can't miss it when you walk outside."

***** 

After speaking with the weather people, I spoke with two pilots who turned me down. I spoke to a third who had a twin-engine aircraft, and said he would take me, as long as I was ready to go immediately.

I showed him my bag and told him I was ready to go.

He hastily filed a flight plan with the tower at an altitude of 14,000 feet, started the engines, and taxied out to the runway. One aircraft landed, and we were on our way. The GPS homed in on Fairbanks at a heading of 165 degrees and 15 minutes later we were at our assigned altitude, bumping along. He had the airplane on automatic pilot, for the 500-mile trip to Fairbanks. I'm not a fan of country music, but Michael was, and I wasn't going to argue with him. We were cruising at 180 knots, and you could see the storm front moving in from the southeast. 

Michael told me not to worry about it because we would be on the ground, in Fairbanks, before it arrived.

He was wrong by 55 miles, or about 13 minutes flying time. It felt like we were being hit by mini-tornadoes every other second. According to the GPS we were making very little headway, but Michael insisted on battling the storm head on. Then we started losing altitude. I looked over my shoulder and there was ice on the forward portion of the wing. I told Michael and he looked over his shoulder and saw the same thing on his side. He said the deicing boots were not working properly.

He still insisted on battling the storm head on, but I told him again if he went southwest, the winds would help push the ice off the wing tips, and we would gain some forward speed.

He asked me how I knew this would happen. 

I told him I was a scientist.

As we passed through 10,000 feet above the ground, he said 'Fuck it,' turned to a heading of 235 degrees, which put the winds at the aircraft's beam.

Within minutes the ice on his wingtips began breaking off, but it was having no effect on my side. We were losing altitude but not as fast, and there was still ice on the starboard wing.

When shit happens, it always happens in bunches. The port side engine began smoking, and then burst into flames. He went through the procedure to put out the fire, and feathered the engine. He called in a distress signal to Fairbanks, and gave them our GPS location, altitude, heading, and souls on board. 

We started losing altitude more quickly, but we received a few blessings in return. We broke out underneath the cloud layer. The winds were calmer, and decisions could be made more rationally now.

The ice came off the wing on my side of the aircraft, as the temperatures rose. The aircraft's wings were now in level flight. 

All we were looking at was dense forest below us, and mountainous terrain west of us; we realized there was no level area to try to put the aircraft down safely.

Michael said, "If you believe in God Doc, now would be a good time to start praying."

When you believe you are about to die the stupidest, and most insane things go through your mind. Michael could not understand why I laughed.

I said him, "You agree that we have no chance of surviving this impact, correct?"

"Doc if we do, for your next trick you can walk on water."

"I want you to try something, and you are going to think I am crazy for mentioning it. Just before impact depress the left rudder as hard as you can and turn the plane hard to the left, lifting the right wing. I want to try to hit the trees tail first."

"You are out of your fucking mind."

"You are absolutely correct. A woman told me a very bad joke on our way up to Fairbanks. I want to see exactly how bad that joke was. She said, 'You have never heard of an airplane backing in to a mountain.' I want to see if we can back this aircraft into some trees."

"What the hell, we have absolutely nothing to lose. Shit, fire warning light number one. I'm feathering the engine. We are at 800 feet, 90 knots, and descending. Let's look for a nice flat group of trees Doc. I'll meet you in heaven or in hell."

"I'd like to meet my daughter first. Let's meet on the ground instead."

"There's a nice group of trees Doctor. I'm going to put the flaps out to slow us down some more. 1000 yards, 300 feet, 70 knots, brace for impact."

"Good luck, I'll see you on the ground."

"Good luck Doctor, 200 yards, 50 knots. 100 yards, 50 yards, here we go, turning hard left rudder."

IMPACT!

********************

16. IT'S A DREAMY CREAMY DAY

Rod walked in the front door with what appeared to be scuba diving gear on his back. In front of him were his children lined up in military fashion, with Delicious standing and smiling behind them. He put down his briefcase and his jacket and waited.

Delicious said, "Colonel Jeffrey, BEGIN."

Rod smiled. He took a hose attachment from the canisters, pointed it at Delicious, and yelled, "CHARGE!" 

His children dispersed as he depressed the trigger on the hose. Whipped cream shot out the front of the hose under high pressure directly at Delicious.

Delicious screamed, turned, and tried to get away. He chased her through the living room, den, and kitchen of his home. He trapped her in the corner of his kitchen and buried her under whipped cream. He continued shooting it at her until the tanks ran out of the compressed air. 

Rosalynn laughed and took pictures as quickly as she could, because Rod told her she was in for a treat when he got home.

Rod said, "Are you going to allow Delicious to eat all that whipped cream by herself General Jeffery?"

"No Mister President, we are going to help her all we can."

The six children, including the one-year-old, dove in to the pile of whipped cream, under which Delicious was covered. 

As she uncovered her face, blew the whipped cream out of her mouth and nose, she asked, "Who made you president?"

"Didn't you know there was an election? I bribed all the children to vote for me, instead of their mother?"

"What did you bribed them with a swimming pool?"

"What good is a swimming pool in the winter? Kids, where are we going on vacation?"

As one they yelled, "We are going to Disney World."

"Roz, you are going to stay home with me; right."

Rod said, "Delicious, I will start force-feeding you every drop of the whipped cream if you start up again."

"Rod, do you really believe I am going to allow you to get away with this. You know this means war."

Rosalynn said, "No, it ends right here. Delicious you had your fun, and Rod, you got even in a very big way. I congratulate both of you on your successes. However, now it stops. Do you both hear me, because if either one of you doesn't, I will get even with both of you in ways that will hurt you severely.

Rod you know what I will do to you if you don't abide by my rules, especially after you have just been fixed. You don't want that to happen, do you? 

Delicious, I love having you around, and my children adore you. I would hate to stop you from coming here, but I will. Are we all on the same page now?"

Delicious said, "Yes, I promise I will stop, no matter how much it hurts me."

Rod agreed. "Yes dear, I refuse to face a fate worse than death."

Roz said, "Good, now you two kiss and makeup."

Delicious slipped as she was trying to get up, and Rod tried to help her. She slipped again and pulled Rod down with her into the whipped cream.

Rod yelled, "Roz, she did that on purpose. I know she did. Look at her she's laughing at me."

"Rod, I'm laughing at you too. It doesn't mean I'm doing it on purpose, does it?"

Rod said, "No." As he attempted to stand up, he put his hand on Delicious' head, and forced her down into the whipped cream.

Delicious yelled, "He did that on purpose, you saw it."

"That is enough children. The next word out of either of you and your punishment begins."

*********

As the adults were cleaning up the mess made by the whipped cream, Jeffrey ran into the living room.

"Daddy, Uncle Even is missing."

"No Jeffrey, Uncle Even is in Alaska."

"Yes dad, but his airplane is missing. They say so on the television."

Rod ran into the den, but missed the part about Even being missing. He called the Denver Post to see if he could get more on the story.

The reporter from the Post told Rod that information was very sketchy. The Fairbanks Tower received a distress call from the aircraft he was on, when it was 55 miles northwest of the airport, with one engine out. It was in rough weather and losing altitude. That was the last call from the aircraft. Search parties will be sent out as soon as the weather clears. That's all the information they received from the newswires.

Rod hung up the phone looking like a ghost. When he turned Delicious said sternly, "He is not dead. I won't let him be dead. It's too important to me for him to be alive. He has a damn girlfriend for the first time in his life. I won't let him die before he has a chance to fall in love with her. I won't let that happen. I just won't let that happen. Rod, I want to go home. I want to work on his program. That's what he told me to do. I want to finish it before he gets back here. I will be fine by myself. I will be working, and I will be fine. He is not dead. He can't be dead. I will not allow him to be dead."

Rosalynn went over to comfort her, but Delicious backed away.

"He's okay Roz. I know he's okay. He can't be dead. It's too soon. I'm going home."

Delicious picked up her purse, walked out the front door, started the car, and went home. 

Rosalynn said, "If he's dead she is going to crack like a pane of glass."

Rod could not tell his wife what he knew, but if Even was gone he would be the one to have to explain to Delicious that it was her father that died in that plane crash, not her uncle as she thought. He silently prayed not to have that conversation with her.

***********

Delicious was at sitting at her computer moments later when the telephone rang.

"Hello Director Meil, I know he's missing, but he is alive, I know it."

"Are you sure you don't read minds Delicious? How did you know it was me?"

"Your men were down here installing who knows what into every corner of this basement. Did you think Even and I didn't guess they would be putting microphones and cameras in here watching and listening to what we are doing? We will find them; we will disable them; but not just yet. We have more important things to do right now."

"I have people there who will be looking for him Delicious. They are good people, and they will not rest until they find him. I promise you, one way, or the other they will find him."

"He will find a way to walk out of those mountains and forests. He will find a road, follow a compass, and walk into a restaurant. He will order bacon, eggs, toast, coffee, and a newspaper for breakfast."

"It is very rough country up there Delicious. The chances of surviving a plane crash are not good. Keep your hopes up, but also be prepared for the worst."

"I'll bet you $100 he's alive."

"I have heard about your $100 bets, and you haven't lost one of them yet. I will take it in the hopes that you are right again."

"I did lose one bet, but that was to my uncle, so that doesn't count."

"Did he cheat?"

"Probably, but I didn't catch him doing it. Did you hear he has a girlfriend?"

"When did that happen?"

"I don't know. He hung up on me before I could claw it out of him."

"It's about time he let loose. I'm happy for him."

"So am I Director, so am I."

************

She was about to open the program but she stopped, and looked above her head. She knew it would be a perfect place to put a camera as well as over either of her shoulders. She put up her screensaver and went to find some high intensity lights.

20 minutes later, she walked back into the basement carrying four of them. She put one of them on her chair, and bent it to resemble a person sitting at the desk looking at the computer screen. She focused the remainder of the lights at the ceiling. She tied a piece of string to the lamp on the chair, and went to get the ladder. She placed it behind the chair, and picked up the string. She climbed up until she could reach the ceiling, and moved the string in an arc, in an attempt to see where a camera could be hidden and see over the person's shoulder sitting at the computer station. She found not one or two on the left side she found three. She disconnected the cables from each camera, plus the electrical connections, rendering them useless. She continued her search only at her station, and found a total of 12 cameras; and 4 microphones. The director was not taking chances on missing anything. She removed them, and put them at her uncles' computer workstation. As soon as she sat down and began to work the telephone rang. This time it was Stan.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 05



"Delicious are you going to be a pain in the ass like your uncle?"

"I have been told that my ass is prettier than his."

"Young woman don't you start with me. I have known you for 12 weeks, and I don't like you."

"Rod has known me for 12 weeks, and he hates me most of the time. Tonight he tried to drown me in whipped cream."

"We want our cameras back."

"I don't have any use for them. You can take them all back, every single one of them; including all the other cameras and microphones you have hidden down here. If you do not do as I ask, I will expose your staff to high-frequency sound levels they won't ever hear, and they won't hear anything else ever again."

"You are going to be a pain in the ass."

"Stan what will the police say if I had them come here and show them all this high tech stuff that wasn't here before we went to Texas. Then we show them the tapes of the trucks coming on the property, without setting off the alarms. What do you think they would say about that Stan?"

"You do not have anything on the property that recorded us doing that."

"Did you see that new nodule above the elevator in the basement, Stan, the one with the mini camera in it? Did you look in the two lights at the entranceway? They have cameras in them. The microphones are in the bushes to the left and right of them. My uncle may act like a bumbling fool sometimes, but it is an act. No one as smart as he is let's men like you run rampant on his property."

"I'm going to kill that son of a bitch. I had no idea he was that sneaky."

"You better hope he's alive so you can kill him, or I may kill you myself for invading his privacy. I could have a warrant put out for your arrest for trespassing on private property, breaking and entering, and anything else the police can think of, but my uncle seemed to like you."

"You are as smart as your test scores indicated. We will pick up everything within next few days."

"Everything Stan; Rod has a friend who is a private detective. He will do a sweep of every inch of the basement and the house. If he finds one bug remaining anywhere, from the attic to the hot springs, you are in big trouble."

"I understand Delicious, everything will be taken out."

*******

17. UP IN THE TREES

I woke up. How about that, it worked. If I ever get a chance I must tell Jennifer about this experience. I must take stock of myself; let's see what's working and what's not working. I am bleeding from the top of my head, but not badly. My arms are moving, and I can move my legs. I don't have any pain in my back, and I can twist my shoulders. I am okay. I am in working order.

The aircraft is in a 70 degree down angle at the nose, and tilted 40 degrees to the left. We are in a copse of trees, but not entangled in them. I must be careful. The windscreen is broken, and I don't want to fall through it, or get cut up by the exposed jagged pieces of plastic.

Michael, I must check my pilot. I unstrap myself from my harness, and nearly fall on him. As I did this the aircraft shuddered and fell towards the ground a few feet. I regrouped and braced myself, as I tried to assess his condition. He is breathing, and his pulse is strong. He has no head wounds I can see, but there is a tree branch that punctured his door. It looks like it has penetrated his left side. That is going to be a problem. His left leg is really badly broken. It is almost like the letter L starting halfway down the calf. I must get him down to the ground and put a splint on that immediately. I have to tend to his wounds, but I have to figure a way to get him down to the ground without killing him first. I decide not to wake him up. He will be in pain soon enough. Why should I inflict it on him now?

I take my first good observation outside the aircraft, and luckily we are only about 20 feet above the ground. It may as well be a mile if I can't find some rope in the aircraft. Otherwise I will have to fasten some tree bark together and make a cord out of it. That will be a long and arduous task, and Michael will definitely wake up while I am doing it. I crawl to the rear of the aircraft to look for emergency supplies, and a medical kit. Both are attached to the bulkhead, and they are fully stocked. There are blankets, pillows, flashlights, matches, and a full survival kit also. Thank goodness Michael has his aircraft well supplied for emergencies.

I wrapped everything I needed together, and began moving forward. The aircraft lurched downward several feet and stopped. I fell and slipped forward towards the nose of the aircraft hitting my head against the rear seat. My head hurts like hell, but what was worse is I heard Michael groan. I immediately went to attend to him.

His eyes were closed, his pulse was still strong, but his leg had moved into a position that was worse than it had been before. I had to get him out of this fucking aircraft soon, or he would never be able to use that leg again.

I started back to get the supplies and the aircraft lurched downward again. This is getting tiresome, but it occurred to me that this was not altogether a bad thing. The lower the aircraft was to the ground the shorter the distance I would have to carry Michael down. 

I braced myself behind my seat and began kicking at it as hard as I could. It didn't move. I realized I was beating on the wrong side of the aircraft to do any good. I moved to the pilots' side and started kicking. It didn't take long before the aircraft started to slide down between the trees. With one final surge, the aircraft plummeted the last eight feet to the ground. It rested on its nose and left wing. The creator was definitely on our side today, because for Michael's sake it was perfect.

I pulled the emergency supplies out of the aircraft and made a makeshift bed for him. I hoped when I moved him he did not wake up, because the pain would be excruciating.

In the survival kit was a small saw, which I used to cut the branch that had penetrated through Michael's door and into his body. I cut the branch on the inside of the door and opened it carefully. I unbuckled his harness, and gravity shifted him towards me. His eyes popped open, and he looked at me.

I smiled at him. "You are one great pilot. That was one hell of a maneuver. When you write it up for the federal authorities make sure they name it after you. You are alive, Michael, but you are seriously hurt. I have to get you out of this plane, and onto the ground. It is going to hurt like hell. Your leg is broken in at least two places, and a branch has penetrated your left side. In a moment you are going to hate God and me. Scream all you want, but this has got to be done now."

I didn't wait for his answer, or for him to ask me questions. I put an arm underneath his shoulders and an arm underneath his ass. I braced my boots against the edge of the doorframe, and pulled with all the strength in my body. He slid out of the aircraft and landed on top of me. 

His screaming was probably heard in Fairbanks, and I did not blame him one bit. 

I shimmied out from underneath his body, and brought the blanket to him. I shifted him as any nurse would do, and managed to get him on top of the blanket, and off the wet ground. He passed out due to the pain, and shock of coming out of the aircraft. I took advantage of the time it gave me to assess his wounds. I slit open his pant leg to see what I was up against. Sometimes I hate being right. His tibia and fibula were broken, and pressing against his skin. I had to make a splint, and set his leg.

I used the saw to cut four branches from low hanging trees. I measured and cut them to size against Michael's leg. I loosened the laces on his boot, and slowly pulled his leg as straight as possible. I placed the branches inside his boot, and ran them along both sides of his leg. I used gray tape to seal the top of his boot and branches together. The Ace bandages from the medical kit were just long enough to wrap one-half of his leg. It took all six of them to wrap his entire leg tight enough, but not cut off the circulation. I knew this would not last long, but it would hold for now.

This most pressing problem corrected, I opened Michael's coat to see how deep the branch penetrated into his abdomen. Finally, we received a bit of good luck. The branch hit his ribs and did not penetrate into the core of his body. It felt as if two of his ribs were broken, but that could be dealt with at a later time.

When Michael regained consciousness I gave him some water. He called me some very interesting family names, and used some Eskimo words I am sure were about my family heritage also, but I accepted each and every one of them cheerfully. 

I handed him two pain pills, and told him to be nice to me, or those would be the last he ever saw.

He apologized profusely, and asked what our situation was. I gave him a brief summation. 

I told him I had to strip some bark from the trees and wrap his leg in it, because the ace bandage would not hold his leg in position well enough while we walked out of here.

He laughed. "Doc, I don't think I'm walking anywhere."

"No Michael, I'm walking you are riding."

"What am I riding in?"

"Let me fix your leg first. I will make you a conveyance when that's done. You do have the toolbox and the airplane?"

"The FAA requires it in Alaska."

"In that case we will be out of here in four hours."

"In your dreams, Doc."

"How much would you like to bet?"

"Is a dollar too rich for your blood?"

"In this situation Michael, it sounds just about right."

*********

It took me an hour to strip enough bark off the trees to wrap Michael's leg and tie it on securely. The bark would start to shrink because of his body heat and hold the sticks tight against his leg. As long as he was not bleeding internally, he had a chance of keeping the leg, and continuing to fly.

I pulled the toolbox from the aircraft to see what was in it. The first thing I removed from the aircraft was the compass. I needed wire and all airplanes have plenty of that available. I pulled out about 400 yards of it, and lay it on the side. I asked Michael if it was possible to open the wheel wells so I could remove the tires.

He looked at me as if I was crazy. I guess he remembered we were alive because of an insane maneuver we tried, so he told me how to do it. 

As I looked at the wheel assembly, I decided to take the wheels and their yokes.

"Doc whatever you are making, you are making it very heavy for yourself to pull."

"Michael, I am the scientist, and the engineer; watch and learn."

The next thing I did was remove a seat from the aircraft, including the seatbelt. I could not have Michael falling out of the chair and injuring that leg any more than it already was. 

I took the bolts from the chair, and threaded it through the top of the wheel yoke, adding wire in the space to make the connection tight. I did not have the convenience of an electric drill to make the holes the proper size for the nuts and bolts. I did the same with the other wheel. Michael was beginning to see the beginning of a rickshaw.

I cut two eight-foot long poles and attached them to the arms of the chair using the wire I had cut previously. I made a backpack for the rear of the chair out of the cloth of the seats, to place the tools and the medical kit in. I attached one side of a blanket to the poles. I had to wait to attach the other side, until Michael was sitting in the chair. I would use the poles to pull the rickshaw through the forest and up and down the mountainous areas to the safety of Fairbanks, which was hopefully not more than 70 ground miles away. We would have to find food to sustain us during the trip. I was not worried about water. I knew how to collect that easily enough. However, hunting is not part of my repertoire. 

Now came the next hard part.

"Michael, I have to stand you up. I'm going to put you over my shoulder, and sit you down as easily as possible in that chair. Under no circumstances are you to put any weight on your left leg. If you do, I will kill you with your Swiss Army knife, and bury you here."

He laughed at me. "You talk a good game Doc, but you won't do it. Look at all the hard work you put into this contraption of yours. It would all be for nothing if you killed me."

"Stop being logical at a time like this Michael. Let's get you into that damn chair. My four hours is nearly up, and I don't like being made a liar."

I must have been getting tired, because he seemed a lot lighter the last time I picked him up. Then I realized I had not picked him up. I just pulled him out of the aircraft, and left him lying on the ground. I am going to have to have my memory checked when we get out of here.

I put him over my shoulder, and walked unsteadily, the 10 feet to my improvised rickshaw. I grabbed his ass, and sat him down in the chair. I noticed the color in his face had drained to white. I slid his legs onto the blanket, pulled it across to the other pole, and began tying it off. It went quickly, because he held his left leg up with his right, keeping the tension off the blanket. When I finished his face was sweating profusely. I gave him water and two more pain pills, even though it was not time for him to take them.

Using the remaining wire, I left a message on the ground near the aircraft: two survivors, one badly Injured. Heading south using wheeled vehicle. Help Us

I took the compass from Michael and took readings to see how badly the magnetic deviation was in the area was. Then I took a four-foot length of shielded cable from the aircraft and looped it through a screw opening in the compass module. I took the readings again to see if there were differences in the readings. There was none.

I turned to Michael and asked, "Where to sir?"

Michael replied, "Fairbanks please, and step on it. I don't want to miss the opening of the Opera."

"I can't afford another speeding ticket sir, but I will go as fast as I can."

It was 3 ½ hours since I made my four-hour prediction, and we were off on our adventure to reach Fairbanks. This time it was on foot, but at least we were alive, in good spirits and moving. 

I looked at the compass, and set my heading due south. As long as we did not run into an impassable river or mountain, we would be fine.

I had not heard a peep from Michael in the last 20 minutes. I looked over my shoulder to make sure I had not lost him. He was sound asleep, and I was happy for him. My makeshift rickshaw was working out well. The wheels and wheel bearings were making pulling all the weight behind me easy, although I was beginning to tire. I wanted to move at least for two hours at a stretch before stopping for a rest. Maybe that would be good for tomorrow, but I did not take into consideration what we had just gone through today.

At 6 PM, after 90 minutes of walking, I was done. I could not move another step if I wanted to. I asked Michael how he was doing. He said his leg was throbbing and he was in pain. 

"I have given you four pain pills over a five hour time span Michael. Can you hold out for a few more hours? We don't know how many days we are going to be out here, and we only have 12 pills left."

"Sure Doc, what the heck could go wrong next? I just don't want to see that bear like in the movie."

"Michael, if you see that bear it's been awful nice knowing you."

"I guess you've never seen a one legged sprinter before have you Doc?"

"I wasn't going to sprint; I was going up into the trees. These branches aren't stout enough to hold a full-grown bear."

"How long do you want to hold up here?"

"I want to get some sleep, and rest my legs. Figure we will be here 3 to 4 hours at the most."

"Let's eat first, and then you can go to sleep."

"We have food?"

"Sure, it's in the blue sack by my feet."

I reached into the sack and pulled out two bags of Trail Mix. I looked at Michael and said, "This is food?"

"If you don't eat anything today, tomorrow that will look like caviar."

"I don't like caviar either. I threw him a bag, sat down with my back against a tree, and started feeding like a squirrel. I do not like Trail Mix. I read the nutritional components, the ingredients, and everything else down to the expiration date. I decided I still did not like TRAIL MIX. However, nutritionally it would get me through the next few days. I fell asleep against that damn tree and woke up with a backache.

********

Something kept hitting me, and it wasn't always in one spot. I lifted my head up just in time to catch one in the jaw.

"Michael, if you do that again I'm going to leave you here."

"Quiet Doc, we have a visitor?"

"Friend or foe?"

"Dinner for a week."

"Where is it?

"20 yards behind the tree you're leaning against."

"What is it?"

"It is a yearling deer, possibly strayed ahead of her mother or she was killed."

"How am I supposed to kill a deer with my bare hands?"

"It would be better if you use the knife in the survival kit. Get up slowly, walk very quietly, and don't make a sound."

Michael was a scant five feet from me so getting to the survival kit was nothing. I opened it, found the six-inch knife, and withdrew it. I turned and saw the deer. Shit, it was Bambi. It had fewer spots, and was a little taller.

"What do I do now Michael?"

"It's survival time Doctor. Make up your mind that this little animal is going to be our ticket home. Get as close to it as you can. Either throw the knife at it, or lunge at it and drive the knife home to kill it. The best way is to slit her throat."

"I have never killed anything in my life, not even in a laboratory."

"This is not killing. This is survival of the fittest. She survives or we do."

The forest is a myriad of moss, twigs, tiny creatures you can't see but can hear. Prey and predatory animals. Suddenly, I was thrust into the role of a predator. I had no skill in this particular role. I moved from one tree to the next, and the next, without startling the little creature. It munched gracefully on flower tops and grass as if its life would last forever. Her mother might be around here somewhere close by. One sound from her and it was over in an instant. This little girl would be gone, fleeing in terror. 

I was within six feet of her, with one tree blocking my path, and her sight line of me. She lifted her head and looked around. I stopped breathing and waited for her next move. She took two steps towards the tree that blocked our view of each other and began eating mushrooms.

I took one long stride from my position towards that tree and stopped again. I couldn't see her, which meant she couldn't see me. I looked towards Michael. He nodded his head slowly.

I gripped the knife tightly in my hand. I said, "I'm sorry little girl." Without moving my feet I reached around the tree and plunged the knife into the little deer's' chest.

She fell. She was making a pitiful sound. She was in pain, kicking her feet and thrashing around. I did what Michael told me to do. I removed the knife from her chest, and I slit her throat from ear to ear. As she bled out, I turned away, and vomited everything I had ever eaten in my entire life. I was a murderer. I had killed an innocent animal so we could survive. I heaved until there was nothing left in me to give back to mother earth in payment for the young life I had taken. I said a silent prayer of mourning and cried.

Michael yelled, "Get the fuck up, grab her by her rear legs and drag her here."

All I wanted to do was to give this poor little animal a good Christian burial.

I dragged her over to Michael, and he began the process of eviscerating her. I couldn't watch him do it.

I dug a deep hole with my back turned to him. He shouted at me to put everything into the hole. I brought him a whole animal. In return he gave me pieces: a head, the chest wall, hips, thighs bones, the leg bones, and bones I could not catalogue. The man should have been a butcher. When he was finished with her, if we had 15 pounds of meat it was a lot. I covered the hole with dirt and moss to hide the smell of blood.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 05



I used the antiseptic wipes to clean the blood off Michael. I cleaned off the blood that was on the rickshaw. I didn't want anything following us because of that smell.

The only plastic bag we had was where the trail mix was. I gladly made that exchange.

"Doc, we have to put some miles between us and this spot. Wolves, big cats, and bears can smell blood for miles. We shouldn't be anywhere around here when they arrive.

I didn't argue with him. I made sure we had everything we brought with us, checked my compass, and headed out on a southerly course again. My stomach hurt like hell. I couldn't get the death of the tiny deer out of my mind. I wanted to live. I wanted Michael to live. I wanted that deer to live.

The scientist in me told me that choices were not always easy. Medicine was the same way. Those who could afford care got it. Those who couldn't just suffered or died. Life was cruel that way.

I didn't stop after two hours because the terrain was exceptionally rough, and we did not put a lot of distance between where we were and where we had been. I continued on until I was exhausted and then stopped.

"Now you'll be happy you killed that dear Doctor. Its meat will give you enough energy to go on. I wish I could help you, but I'm stuck in this damn chair with my ass hurting like hell. I would do anything to lie down."

"You can lie down anytime you want Michael."

"Now you tell me you son of a bitch."

"The bark has dried sufficiently to hold your leg in place. As long as you don't put any pressure on it I can stand you up, move the rickshaw, and lie you down on a blanket."

"Remind me to kill you when this is over."

"Okay, but I won't be able to buy you a new airplane if you do."

"You are going to buy me a new airplane?"

"As long as you don't kill me I will."

"I will protect you with everything I have Doc."

"At this moment Michael, that is not a very comforting thought."

********

I made a small fire and roasted several pieces of deer meat. Venison has a taste all its own. If anyone ever tells you it tastes like chicken, hit them, because it is not true. It is very tender, with no fat at all. It is almost like veal, but has a gamy taste to it. I made a promise to the little girl who gave her life for me, not to eat venison when I was back in civilization.

I'm not sure why I did it, but that night I made several spears for us to use, just in case we had visitors, because of the smell of roasted meat. I also made a picket line of fireplaces. I could light them quickly to scare off any animal that approached us if necessary. It wasn't necessary. The night was peaceful and quiet. I slept for a full seven hours, and when I woke up, Michael was still fast asleep. I cooked meat for breakfast; and to chew on, while I was walking.

We started our second day under darkened conditions, knowing that above us somewhere that storm front was still causing havoc. The tops of the trees were not visible because of the clouds or fog, but at least it was not raining. The trees were blocking the fierce winds we could hear howling above us. Still, the footing was treacherous. The ground was wet, and the rickshaw was heavy. Going uphill was difficult. Going downhill was worse, because I could not control the speed.

Michael was hysterical. "Driver, oh driver, could you be more careful please. I spilled some tea on my dress. You are going to have to pay to get it dry cleaned."

As I struggled with the rickshaw I answered politely, "Fuck off Michael."

"May I quote you sir?"

"Eat my shorts Michael. Either that or you get up here and drive."

Every time we entered a relatively flat area of the forest, Michael seemed to become quiet. When I checked him his pulse was not as strong as it had been, but he was hanging in there. I hoped it was the effects of the pain pills. I was giving him one every six hours. He was not complaining about his leg as much. In medicine this was not always a good sign.

After my fourth two hour walking session, I settled us down for the evening. A persistent drizzle started earlier today but we made a decent amount of progress. I wished I had some visual cues to make reference to, but these trees blocked everything from site. I didn't dare try to climb one, because if I fell and hurt myself, both Michael and I would surely die out here in the wilderness.

I settled Michael underneath the bows of a huge spruce tree and the ground underneath it was nearly dry. I set up our campfire, made our dinner, and with very little talking, I fell asleep.

I dreamt of my daughter sitting at home worrying about me. I dreamt about what type of father I would have been for Delicious growing up. I was so driven during my 20s to prove to my father that I was someone to be proud of nothing else mattered. I worked tirelessly to gain recognition, power, and money to make him proud of me. I never succeeded, not even until the day he died.

He hated me for leaving Maine and not working with him at the paper mill. Would I have been that type of father? Would I have hated Delicious for succeeding where I had not dared to go because of my father? I hoped not. I wondered what was written in Divines diary. I had to live to see what she wrote about us, about me and about our baby. Our baby, how did that happen? I had to live to find out how that miracle of birth happened.

********

We now entered our fourth day. Michael wasn't well but he was still hang in with me. Our friendly banter had ceased, as weariness had taken hold of both of us. My two-hour shifts continued but I was not making as much distance each day as I made the day before. I was halfway through my third two-hour shift, and my legs were leaden. The forest was so dense we had yet to break out into a clearing to see the sky. We had not seen or heard an aircraft or helicopter looking for us. It would not have made a difference because we could not signal them if we wanted to. 

I was working on math problems to take my mind off the pain of walking. I was thinking about a project I had in my mind for the near future and it was working out very nicely. I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing, and nearly crossed over a dirt road, without realizing the significance of it. It was not a paved road, but it was definitely a road. It headed southeast, and it was heavily forested on both sides. It could have been a firebreak, but I didn't care. It was a road, and I knew it would eventually lead us to civilization.

I yelled to Michael, "We are on a road. I can see the sky." It was gray and menacing. I began moving faster down this open corridor of life.

When something good happens to you, something bad is sure to come up and bite you in the ass. A few hours later, it started to rain. It was not a sprinkle, or a drizzle. It was a downpour. I went to cover Michael with the spare blanket, and wondered why he didn't wake up when the rain started to come down heavy. He was burning up with fever. I had to get him to a doctor or a hospital as quickly as possible or I was going to lose him. His leg must have become infected. He must be bleeding internally, and I did not know where. We had gone through too much together, and I did not want to lose him now. Please God don't let him die, I'll do anything you want just don't let him die. He saved me, please save him.

I pulled the hood of my parka over my head, grabbed the handles of the rickshaw, and began jogging down the muddy road. 

I am a sedentary human being, a scientist. I sit in my laboratory and look to create new things. I use my head, not my body. I am already exhausted after nearly four days of walking in the wilderness. My mind does not believe my body can go on, but on this day, for some reason, it does. My body reacts like that of an athlete, with years of training. It does not tire as it normally would as I jogged and walked down this road for mile after mile, pulling the rickshaw with my dying friend in it. I will not let him die. I ask God with every step I take to let Michael live, and to let him fly again. I forgive him for cutting up the tiny deer that has kept up feed for the past four days, but it will mean nothing if you do not live Michael.

I keep looking for any sign of life. At times you cannot see 10 feet in front of your face. At other times the rain pauses, gives you a brief respite and you could see a few hundred yards ahead of you. 

During one of those brief interludes I thought I saw something. Then I saw it again. Smoke, smoke was coming out of someone's chimney. It could not be too far away if I could see it in this weather. I continued jogging/running down the road, pulling Michael towards that promising sign. 

Lights, I see lights in the windows of a huge two-story house up ahead. It could only be a quarter mile away, if I can see it in this rain.

There, I can see a car in the driveway! Someone is home. Thank you God, thank you so much for helping my friend.

Moments later, I run up the driveway towards the front door. I pull the rickshaw up under the portico to get Michael out of the rain. I opened the hood of my parka, and pounded on the front door calling out for help. Never in my wildest dreams did I expect this person to open the door.

She said, "Can I help you?"

I looked at her in total surprise, "Jennifer, it's me Even. The pilot of my aircraft needs a doctor desperately. Do you have a phone?"

She screamed with joy, and grabbed me. "Even, you're alive? Everyone thought you were dead. Come in, make your phone call. Bring your friend inside."

I made the call to emergency services. Jennifer had to tell them where we were, because I had no idea. They were dispatching a helicopter to get us, even though the weather was marginal at best.

While we waited for the helicopter, I tended to Michael. I removed his outer clothing, and used a knife, and scissors to cut away everything from his injured leg. He was soaked with sweat. I stripped him down to his bare skin. I asked Jennifer for a bucket of water, alcohol, and towels so I could try to cool him down. 

She delivered everything to me with lightning speed.

Gordon came out to see what was happening.

Jennifer told him to go back to his room.

"No mommy, I want to watch.

I told him everything I was doing and why.

He nodded his head, and seemed to understand.

I worked on Michael as if this was an everyday occurrence in my life. I asked Jennifer if she had any news about our returning to Denver, to get the horror out of her eyes.

When she regained her equilibrium she said, "Even, you didn't have to get in an aircraft accident, and walk into my home like this to impress me. You could have called and asked me."

"I am anything but ordinary Jennifer. When we get married you will find that out very quickly. The only reason Michael and I are alive is because of your father's story. We did a maneuver at the last possible second before we crashed. We spun the aircraft around and crashed tail first into the trees. It saved me, and if we get Michael to the hospital in time, it will save him also."

"You are kidding with me Even. You didn't do that?"

"When Michael wakes up ask him if I am lying. I don't lie. Well that's not true. I lie to my niece just to drive her crazy. I will not lie to you Jennifer. I will never cheat on you or lie to you. I swear on my sister, who I loved, I will never do that to you." 

"Even here is my local number. As soon as they finish checking you out at the hospital, you better call me. I don't think I have ever had a proposal quite as interesting or romantic as yours."

"When I introduce you to my friends Rod and Rosalynn, you will think my proposal is very ordinary. What he did to her was absolutely outlandish. How soon would you like to get married?"

"We haven't had that dinner yet?"

"That's true, and there's one more thing I have to tell you. I just found out that the young girl I thought was my niece is actually my daughter. I have no idea how that happened, but my sister left everything I need to know in her diary. I swear to you I never knowingly had sexual intercourse with my sister, and when I read her diary it will be the first time I will know how that happened."

"It's an 18 year old secret your sister left for you. She never hinted that her child was your child as well?"

"She never said one word. She told everyone that she lost her virginity at Cape Cod during spring break to Julius Mark, the man my parents forced her to marry. It was a terrible marriage from day one. I offered my sister everything to leave him, and come to live with me. She refused every offer I ever made. This must have been the reason why."

"I would think so Even. She was probably too embarrassed to tell you what she did."

"Are you coming back to Denver with me so we can get married?"

"Are you going to wine me, and dine me before hand?"

"Is there a diamond store here in Fairbanks?"

"Yes there are several of them. There is also a Wendy's, and a McDonald's."

"I'm sure Gordon would love either of those for his dinner. For you, I was thinking of something a little better, with cloth tablecloths and napkins that match."

"I love sushi."

"You are going to love Delicious."

"Who is Delicious?"

"Delicious is my new daughter."

Jennifer was about to ask another question when the roar of a helicopter cut her off. This time I would not be denied. I said to Jennifer, "I wanted to do this when we got off the airplane in Fairbanks, but I was too timid." I took her into his arms, and for the first time in my life I kissed a woman passionately.

When we came up for air, Jennifer said, "That's not fair Even, you can't leave me this way."

"If you think it's not fair to you, just think about what it feels like for me. I have never done that before. I'll stop by tomorrow. Make sure you are packed because you and Gordon are coming with me to Denver. If your lawyers don't know how to take care of your estate problems, I'll send Rod here. He will tell them how to do it. Are you on the pill?"

"No, I'm Catholic; I'm not allowed to use any method of birth control."

"Wonderful, just wonderful, I always wanted a big family, but I never thought I would have one. I will start building an extension on the house immediately. There is no sense waiting until the last minute."

There was a pounding on the front door. I let the EMS team in, and pointed to Michael. I told them about the multiple fractures to his leg, the two possible broken ribs, and a very high fever.

One of the team wanted to check me out, but I refused. I ordered him to take care of Michael, because I did not want to lose him.

They put Michael on IV fluids, transferred him onto a gurney, and loaded him onto the helicopter. They had to force me into the helicopter with him.

I waved goodbye to Jennifer as they were closing the door, and yelled that she better be ready to leave in the morning.

She closed the door to her home, and leaned back against it. Even Luck was a steamroller when he wanted to be she thought. He was fun, he was honest, and he was the smartest man she had ever met. He was not after her money, which most of the men she met were. 

As she thought about her parents, she said, "I'm going back to Denver and getting married mom. Please be happy for me. He's not like dad. I know he made your life miserable at times with his philandering. He made both of us happy too, when he finally settled down and stayed with us. I don't think Even is that type of man. He waited a long time to find one woman, and that woman is me. I am really happy mom, really happy." 

She went over to Gordon to tell him.

"Gordon, mommy is going to get married."

"I know you are going to marry the airplane man mommy."

"How did you know?"

"Mommy when they showed his picture on the television, and they said he was missing or dead in an airplane crash you cried and I had to hold you. Then he came here tonight, and he kissed you, you smiled. You don't let anybody kiss you, except me. So I know you will marry him. It was easy."

"Gordon, you are too smart for your own good. Your mommy loves you, and soon you going to have a daddy for the first time."

"What do I call him?"

"Why don't you talk it over with Even? You don't have to call him daddy if you don't want to. I'm sure that both of you can come up with a name you will both be happy with. Is that okay with you?"

"Yes, I guess so. I hope he has a computer I can play with, mine is broken."

Jennifer laughed. "I'm sure he has a computer. Whether you can play with it or not will be up to him."

************

18. A SHORT CALL HOME

I was in the emergency room waiting to find out about Michael's condition. I asked if I could make a long-distance call to let my daughter know I was okay.

A man dressed in black tapped me on my shoulder. "Hello Even, fancy meeting you here."

I turned and immediately recognized a friendly face. "Hello Shelby, what did you do wrong that he sent you up here?"

"Even, sometimes the director can't take a joke. This is my punishment. Would you like to use a telephone?"

"Have you spoken to him already?"

"No, I'll let him wait a little while. When he lets me go back to civilization, I'll start acting like a human being again."

"Are you sure you guys are working for the same team?"

"We always work for the same team. However, when it comes to internal politics we don't always see eye to eye. Make your call Even; she is probably sitting at the computer working on bending your radio waves."

"Does everyone know about my project?"

"Not everyone Even, just a select few hundred within our family."

"A select few hundred; I'm going to learn sign language."

"It won't help you; we are experts at that too."

***************

I dialed my home number and waited for an answer. It rang and rang and rang. I was about to hang up when she answered the phone.

"This better be important Rod, I was in the shower."

"Are you naked?"

"Yes, are you happy now?"

"Little girl, if that's going to be your attitude I'm going to hang up and not tell you I am alive."

"EVEN, UNCLE EVEN IS IT REALLY YOU?"

"No Princess it's not me. It's a chimpanzee imitating my voice."

"It's you, you're looking for a beating already."

"Your mother gave me permission to call you before she beats the shit out of me. This is a very long distance call."

Delicious laughed. "I told you Uncle Even, if anyone could figure out a way to make a phone call that long distance, it would be you. Are you alright, is everything where it belongs?"

"I am at the hospital in Fairbanks. They just finished checking me over, and I am fine. I am waiting for the results of the tests on my pilot. He got banged up pretty severely in the accident. I was able to walk us out and got help. Baby girl how are you? You know you should put a towel or a robe on, because I can see you. I'm using one of their telephones, and the clarity of the cameras they put in our house is magnificent. Is that a birthmark on your butt cheek or dirt?"

Delicious screamed. "You pervert"; as she dashed back into the bathroom.

"Don't bend over like that, Delicious. It makes me want to give you more than an injection in your backside."

"They put cameras in here too? Wait until Stan comes here to remove them; I'm going to kill him."

I laughed, "Delicious, you are too easy."

"You bastard, did you just do it to me again?"

"Did I do what to you again, my dearest niece? I'm adjusting my hearing aids."

"I've been worried sick over you since we heard your plane was missing. Now you are going to wish you had never walked out of that forest. I am going to exfoliate you, hair by hair, until you are bald from head to toe."

"Can it wait until after my wedding?"




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 05



"Who are you marrying the pilot?"

"No, her name is; no you don't deserve to know her name."

"Uncle Even, if you want to live to say the words 'I do', you better give me some information, or never step foot in the state of Colorado again."

"I'll think about your threat and call you back."

"Uncle Even don't you do this to me. Who is she?"

"Are you going to be nice to her?"

"Of course I'm going to be nice to her. I may kill you for torturing me this way, but I am going to be nice to your wife."

"She is a great mother, Delicious; and a really wonderful woman. I met her on my way up to Fairbanks. I fell in love with her when I looked into her eyes. She has a four-year-old son named Gordon. Her name is Jennifer Stars. She lives in Brighton, 45 miles northeast of Denver. I'm sure you'll love her, and Gordon is a real trip. We were sitting in the aircraft and Gordon stands up, looks me straight in the eyes, and asked, "How much money do you make?" Jennifer was aghast at that statement, but it was fun. We wound up having a very good time."

"What does she look like?"

"She comes straight from heaven. Her hair and eyes are as black as coal. Her skin is as white as snow. She is about five foot seven, with a very nice figure. I kissed her tonight."

"That is wonderful Uncle Even, absolutely wonderful. When are you coming home?"

"I want to wait to see what happens with Michael. I hope to be able to leave sometime tomorrow. I'm going to rent a private jet to take us directly to Denver if one is available."

"Would you like me to make sure one is available for you?"

"Yes Delicious, do that for me. If you have to, have one sent up from Seattle. It doesn't matter what type of aircraft, just have a jet here for me tomorrow, and tell the crew we may be delayed a few days before departure."

"You got it Uncle Even. I am so happy that you are alive. I just won another $100."

"What sucker did you take it from this time?"

"Director Meil."

"Wow that was a good win. That $100 should cover part of the tirade you had last week, or did you remember to put that money into the pretzel jar, as you were honor bound to do, the moment you walked into the house."

"I wasn't thinking about the pretzel jar when I walked into the house. I was thinking about my missing uncle."

"You have to get your priorities straight baby girl. Money always comes first, then water and food. After that you can think about relatives.""

"Uncle Even, you are so full of shit."

"That will be $10 please."

"I hate you when you trick me into doing that. It's just not fair."

"Would you call Father McAuley for me? Ask him if he has time available to perform a wedding this weekend? I want to be a daddy as soon as possible."

"You don't have to be married to become a daddy."

"Yes I know, but I would like to do it the right way the first time around."

"Doesn't she have to come off the pill and wait a while before she can get pregnant?"

"No, Jennifer is like Rosalynn. She has never used any type of birth control. We are going to have more children then Roz and Rod have. We are going to start building an extension to the house immediately."

"Hold on for a moment Delicious; the Doctor is here."

I shook hands with Doctor Reed. "How is Michael doing Doctor?"

"You were correct Doctor Luck. His fibula and tibia are both fractured and broken. Two of his ribs are broken, and one is severely bruised. He was bleeding inside his leg because of a crushed artery. We were able to seal that off. The big problem, as you said, is the leg. We don't have the type of equipment here to do the kind of surgery he needs to save it. He doesn't have the insurance or the money to pay for the transportation to get him down to Seattle or Portland to get the proper care."

"Doctor, money is the least of his worries. Whatever he needs, I will take care of it."

"We need to get this infection under control, before we can do anything else. As soon as that happens, we have to get him to a good Orthopedic Hospital. I have never seen a leg that mangled in all my years as a surgeon."

"Do you have a hospital in mind?"

"No but I have a doctor in mind. Let me find her and if she is a reasonable distance away, she would be Michael's best chance."

"Doctor Reed, spare no expense. Michael saved my life. I want him to be able to fly again. He can't do it with one leg. Find that Doctor, and find her soon, please. Bribe her, if necessary, but ask her to take Michael as her patient."

************

"Delicious, are you still there?"

"No, I'm on my way to Bermuda."

"So that's why you bought those bikinis."

"Yes and the giant size tubes of sunscreen. What would you like me to do Uncle Even?"

"Do you know how to use a computer?"

"Do you want me to burn this one down?"

"It's okay with me, it's insured. The work that's inside it is in the safe. I'm sure there are many young women in jail that would love to make your acquaintance."

"Are you running out of things to say to me Uncle Even?"

"I guess I'm lonely. I haven't had a good argument with anyone in over a week. I miss it."

"Don't run away next time. I made the mistake not you."

"No Delicious, the only thing you did was hurt my pride. I am the great and powerful Even Luck. No one can break my ciphers; no one can break my codes. No one that is until you entered my life. I reacted like a three-year-old and ran away screaming, 'I don't love you anymore'; when what I really meant to say was, "I couldn't love you anymore if I tried. You mean the world to me and I acted like a fool. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Only if you forgive me first Uncle Even."

"Gee whiz, those cameras they put in our house are really good. I can see that thing just above your pubic..."

"EEEEVVVVVVVVVEENNNNNNN..."

**********

19. BUYING A 'BLOODY RING'

"Hello Jennifer, it's me Even."

"Hello Even, what did the Doctor say?"

"I am fine, but Michael is really messed up. They are trying to find an orthopedic surgeon, who is the best in the business. Once they find her, I'm going to fly him to wherever she is and have her take care of his leg. Doctor Reed said it is his only chance of keeping it."

"Does that mean we're not going to Denver tomorrow?"

"I am picking you up in the morning at eight sharp. If I have to carry you and Gordon away in a sack, you are coming with me. If we have to make a detour to Seattle to drop off Michael we will. However you and I are one from tomorrow morning on. What size is your ring finger?"

"I think it's a 7 or 7 ¼."

"Would you like to pick out your diamond, or would you like to take 'Pot Luck', and wear the one your future husband picks out?"

"Even, a girls' best friend is a diamond. You can hardly go wrong buying one."

"Baby, a diamond is a piece of coal put under intense pressure for a long time."

"Even I see what you mean about not being ordinary. Do you want me to walk around with a piece of coal on my finger and wait for it to turn into a diamond?"

"No, I'm sure I'll find a stone you will like."

"I am positive you will. I have more faith in you then you have in yourself."

***********

"Shelby would you mind driving me around for a little while?"

"I know a nice diamond store about 5 miles from here. They have a good selection of loose stones they can mount in about an hour. You want a platinum setting with at least five prongs. You also want a wedding set that it will fit into."

"Were you listening into my conversation?"

He pointed to his ear and I saw the little bud sitting in his canal. "Why did you think I offered you my phone Even? The director wants to know everything you say and do, while you are up here."

I laughed. "So you are trying to get back to civilization by using me as your magic carpet?"

"Even do you know how cold it gets up here in the winter?"

"Do you remember I was up in Point Barrow for 5 months, from December through May? The average temperature was 22 degrees below zero, and I think that was inside the trailers. My toes didn't talk to me for 3 months after I returned to Colorado."

"Let's go shopping Even. I don't want to think about temperatures that low."

********

We walked into the diamond store, and every alarm in the store went off. I raised my hands above my head so they could see I did not have a weapon. However, the two guards with shotguns were not impressed.

They yelled, "Get on the ground with your hands and feet spread."

I didn't have to be asked twice. I was the most cooperative person they had ever seen.

All Shelby could do was laugh.

The guards asked him what he was laughing about.

Nonplussed he said, "If I wanted to, both of your asses would be dead, because of the way you reacted to this incident."

The owner of the store came out from the back not at all pleased with what Shelby said. He wanted to know why his guards had failed at their jobs.

Shelby responded, "I took an innocent civilian off the sidewalk and put him in front of me. I walked him into your store, and your alarms went off. Your guards came out and pointed their weapons at him. Meanwhile, I have my .45 automatic in my right hand. I take down both guards as they kill the civilian with their shotguns. I rob the store and walk out the back killing you in the process."

"What should my guards have done differently?"

"You should always have one guard in the front of the store, behind the counter where the door opens. The other guard stays in back. This way you have eyes front and back, plus you can see everything with your cameras. Two guards in the back do you no good, unless they are playing cards."

The owner said to the guards, "Do it."

The guards didn't question the owner. They split up and took their new positions.

"What can I do for you gentlemen?"

"My friend is getting married. He would like a 4 carat, or larger VVS1 blue white diamond, round preferably, anything but square or rectangular. If you have, he would like a wedding set included."

I looked at Shelby as if he was a gift from God. I had no idea what he said but it sounded wonderful.

The owner asked us to follow him into the back so we could enter the vault. All his large stones were there.

Diamonds were not the only thing in his vault. He had a few million dollars in cash in a cage, and he had gold: gold nuggets, and gold dust in another cage. Prospectors brought it to him. He assayed it, paid for it, stored it, and twice a month shipped it to dealers in San Francisco. He was a middleman. He made a profit buying from the prospectors. He made a profit selling to the dealers. There was no downside for him. If the price of gold went down too much, he held onto it, because gold is one of those rare metals that everyone has to use. From pharmaceutical companies to rocket makers, gold is a necessary evil, and there is a limited amount of gold to go around.

The owner took out a tray of diamonds, and I understood why women drool looking at them. They flash under the lights. They sparkle, and they show off every color of the rainbow.

Shelby pushed me out of the way. He put on a pair of white gloves and started pushing the diamonds around. The owner put a black mat next to him, and he started putting stones on it. In all he put seven stones on the mat and told the man these would do.

He asked for a jewelers loop and looked at each one individually, like a doctor surveying an x-ray. He found one and put it aside. He took off the loop, and set it down. He grabbed the owner by his tie, and pulled him to his nose.

"What are you doing with a Blood Diamond?"

The owner replied, "I don't deal in illegal diamonds. All my diamonds are laser tagged."

"Then you better explain this one to me."

The owner looked through the loop, and it was not tagged. He started to sweat. He said to Shelby, "I'll give you this one for free. Just don't tell anyone about it."

Shelby said, "You just made the biggest mistake of your life. If I find another illegal diamond in there, you are going to federal prison for the rest of your days."

He handed me his weapon, and told me if the owner made any suspicious moves to put one bullet into the middle of his chest, then he would take the gun back and kill him."

Shelby started looking through the diamonds, and started separating the legal ones from the Blood Diamonds. Within 5 minutes he had more than 20 of them selected. The owner looked like he was about to have a heart attack.

"Do you want to tell me anything, before I read you your Miranda rights? Remember I can't promise you anything, but it may help you, if you help us."

The owner said, "I can give you the suppliers in San Francisco and Miami."

"Who are they, who do they work for, and how do they move the stones?"

"If I tell you all that now I will have nothing to bargain with later."

"Do you see this man sitting here? His name is Doctor Even Luck. Before we leave here today you are going to make him a diamond ring for his fiancée. You will sell it to him at full price and give him a receipt. It will prove that he has been here and you have spoken to him. Your lawyer will be able to put him on the stand. He will bear witness to the fact that I spoke with you, and you gave me these people's names and other information. You will have been a helpful witness for the federal government. You will have helped us put criminals behind bars. The judge will take this into consideration and so will the federal prosecutors when it comes time to make sentencing recommendations. I will speak to them on your behalf personally."

For the next 15 minutes the owner of the store laid out the entire sequence of events that led from the diamond mines of Nigeria to Miami, Texas, San Francisco, and then the West Coast, from Los Angeles to Fairbanks. It was a tale worthy of a James Finder novel.

Shelby made three phone calls. One was local to other agents. Then he called the local police. The last was to Director Robert Meil. 

"Good afternoon director, I have him by the collar."

"That's what I pay you for."

"Is that what you call that thing I get every month: pay? I think it's an insult to anyone's intelligence."

"Who said you were intelligent?"

"My mother did."

"Then go back to her."

"I can't you divorced her, and she won't talk to me anymore, because I'm a man."

"Is that my fault?"

"Well it certainly not mine."

"Why are you calling me besides that you have Even on a leash?"

"Blood Diamonds. We have a trail from Fairbanks all the way back to Nigeria. You are not going to believe who the head of it is in San Francisco."

"Who is it?"

"I'll tell you when I get back to Austin."

"You are not getting off the hook that easily."

"I called you what you are; a cock-sucking son of a bitch and you know it. You piss everyone off to keep them afraid of you. It's no way to run a company. It is no way to garner respect or loyalty. If you want to fire me, fire me. I am not staying in Fairbanks one more day then I have to. I like the action of looking for crooks and spies. If you don't want me doing it under your aegis, I'll go to the other company and do it for them. Dad get your head out of your ass and run this company correctly before you have to revolt on your hands and everyone goes elsewhere. We are the best undercover people in the world, because nobody knows we exist. Don't blow it."

"I have been waiting for you to grow a pair of balls for eight years Junior. I believe it has finally happened. How long will it take you to wrap things up?"

"There's nothing big up here. Probably a few days of paperwork that's all."

"Finish what you're doing and get down here. You will be my assistant for the next few months, and then I will retire. This company is yours to run as you see fit. I'm going to love it as you ass spreads like mine did. I liked the hunt, but there is more than footwork involved to keep our country safe. It's finding the right people for the right job, and keeping them on their toes. It's a big responsibility, because we at war with these people every day. That's why we have to stay invisible, and have to continue that way. Don't you ever forget that when you're sitting in this seat. The day you sit down, it becomes your seat, and the sign on the door means what it says: The Shit Stops Here."

"I quit. I don't want your job. I don't like your job. I will not take your job. I don't like paperwork. Mom will laugh at me if I take your job. You had this planned from the very beginning didn't you?"

"Listen to me Shelby; you have 2 months to get your act together down here. Then your mother and I are going on a cruise to Greece. Don't you dare fuck up those plans. She will kill you."

"You two are divorced. Why are you going on a cruise together?"

"Who told you we were divorced?"

"You did. Mom did. You both did. You told me you were divorced. You argued all the time when I was home. It was so bad I move out of the house."

"We finally got you out of the house didn't we?"

"You prick. You tricked me just to get me out of the house?"

"You were 26 years old. You had worn out your welcome. It was time for you to spread your wings and live on your own. We did it for your own good. How much longer was your mother going to wash your shorts? We haven't had an argument since the day you left."

"You are the perfect spymaster dad. I never had a clue. I will never be as good as you."

"You don't have to be as good as me. You have to be the best that you are. The men and women around you will keep this company Invisible."

"Okay Mister Director, I'll see you in a few days."

*********

"He is your father?"

"Is it that hard to believe?"

"Yes it is. You were always civil and brilliant. He was always rude, and grumpy."

"I guess after 22 years in that job it wears on you. Now, suddenly, it's mine."

"Apparently he's been grooming you for it for many years, and waiting for you to grow up."

"How did you hear that?"

I showed him a small piece of paper shaped like a megaphone that I had placed in my ear."

"Come on Even, your shiting me."

"You used high tech; I used low tech. However, while you were talking to your father, I got Jennifer her diamond ring."

"Did you pick it out, or did he."

"He did, but he showed me the laser tag engraving before he mounted it."

"How much did it cost?"

"$53,350 including the insurance and the certification."

"How large was the stone?"

"The stone was just over 5 carats and he threw in the setting for free. He didn't have a wedding set to go with it."

"I would ask to see it, but it's wrapped too pretty to open it."

**********

Shelby's friends showed up shortly after his phone call and seized all the diamonds in the store. They counted each one, and then recounted them. The local police arrived to find out what was going on. Shelby advised the Sergeant that they had impounded every diamond in the store because many of them were illegally imported Blood Diamonds. He needed the vault inventoried, sealed, and guarded, until the contents were taken away by an armored car to the federal building. Every video recorder was to be kept running 24/7, just in case someone with sticky fingers got tempted to walk away with some merchandise. 

I told Shelby I would be fine, and he should take care of his business. I was going back to the hospital.

***************

20. A DINNER PROPOSITION

I left the store and walked towards the hospital. I was mulling over the events that occurred in the store, when someone beeped, and pulled up alongside me.

Jennifer smiled. "Hello stranger you look lost. Gordon wants to go to Wendy's for dinner. Would you like to join us, so I can tell you where to go, and how to get there?"

"As long as you are going to do it nicely, yes." I slid into the front seat of her Tahoe, and kissed her. Then I said hello to Gordon. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 05



I asked Jennifer, "Are we considering this wining and dining you?"

"I don't think so."

When we walked into Wendy's it was packed. It took us nearly 5 minutes to reach the front of the line, and longer to get served. Jennifer carried the food while I carried the soft drinks, straws, ketchup, mustard, spoons, forks, napkins, salt, and pepper.

An elderly couple saw us looking for a table. They waved to us, and asked us to join them. We accepted gratefully.

Gordon, being the gentleman he is, asked if there was anything they would like from our trays. The couple declined.

I dropped a straw on the floor and bent down to pick it up. That's when I felt the lump in my pocket. I knew it was wrapped and that would not do, so I excused myself for a moment. Gordon asked if he could come along with me.

"Absolutely."

He took my hand and we walked to the men's room. I opened the door and we walked in. He looked around suspiciously. "This is the first time I've been in a men's room. I've always had to go with my mom. It's embarrassing for 4-year-old boy to go to the ladies room."

"Well Gordon, anytime we are together it will be my pleasure to escort you to the men's room. Do you have to use the facilities in here or did you just come to look?"

"I just came to look."

"I'm in here for a different reason too. Would you like to see it?"

"Yes."

I reached into my pocket, and pulled out the ring box. I unwrapped and opened the box. I showed Gordon the ring I was about to give to his mother. "What do you think Gordon, is she going to like?"

"I think Mommy's going to cry."

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"This time it's a good thing. She cried when her mommy died. It was a bad thing that time."

"Did you help mommy when she cried?"

"I did the best I could."

"I'm sure it helped her very much Gordon. I think she's going to need your help tonight too. When she cries will you hug her for me?"

"Yes."

"Thank you Gordon I think that will help mommy a lot."

I held the ring box in my hand as we walked towards our table. Gordon moved towards his seat as I stopped in front of Jennifer. I looked into her eyes and could not believe how lucky I was. I knelt down on both knees in front of her and her mouth opened in shock. The noise in the restaurant ceased and all eyes turned towards us. I found it hard to open my mouth, but I overcame my fears. I opened the ring box and said,

"Jennifer Stars you are the love of my life. I want you to live with me and love with me today, tomorrow, and all the years of our lives. I give to you everything that I am, everything that I have and everything that I will ever be. All I ask of you is this: Jennifer Stars will you marry me?"

There was no sound in the restaurant. The fryers were silent, the grill was silent, the bell at the drive through window was silent, and the cash registers were silent. Everyone and everything waited for Jennifer Stars to answer my question.

Her lips quivered, her eyes welled up with tears. She finally gathered up enough strength, and enough willpower to nod her head. Then she gasp "YES!" I slipped the ring on her finger, but I don't believe she looked at it. She put her arms around my neck and kissed me. I felt that kiss travel through every fiber of my being, and I never, ever wanted that feeling to end.

I never heard the crowd roaring and applauding our engagement. Gordon was yanking hard at my sleeve. 

"You told me to hug mommy for you if she was crying. Look she's crying."

"You are right, Gordon. Your mother needs you now." I put him into his mother's arms, and she kissed every inch of his face as she hugged him.

"Mommy, I saw your ring before you did. I told dad you would like it."

"Is that what you two decide on? You're going to call Even, dad?"

"We didn't talk about it, but everyone else has a dad. He makes you happy, so dad is fine with me."

I smiled. "Gordon, since you are going to call me dad, is it okay with you if I tell everyone that you are my son? I would really like that a lot."

"I would like that too."

I picked up my root beer and said, "I would like to propose a toast. To the new Jennifer, and Gordon Luck, may we always be a happy, healthy, and loving family."

After everyone took a sip of their sodas, Jennifer asked, "Are you coming home with me tonight?"

I kissed her and shook my head. "I want to say yes to you more than anything I have ever wanted in my life. However the first time I make love with you we are going to be man and wife. I know it may sound old-fashioned. It may even sound ridiculous in this day and age. I want you more than I want air, but I want you as my wife first. I am Catholic by birth. I am agnostic by choice. I have had many long discussions with Father McAuley about religion. I have nearly succeeded in changing his mind, more often than he has succeeded in changing mine. He is going to wonder why I am going to confession before we get married. He is going to wonder why we are getting married in church. He is going to wonder about a myriad of things about me, but I am not. I know that marrying you before God is the one thing I want for us before I take you as a woman in our bed."

Jennifer's mouth was open in surprise, when the elderly woman sitting next to her said, "Miss if that is not an open declaration of love, I have never heard one. My husband and I have been married for nearly 47 years. Although both of us wanted to take that step just before we were married, we waited. It seemed like a year before our wedding day, but it was less than 2 months. Times may change, morals may change, but what your fiancé just said to you was the most wonderful present any bride should hope to receive."

Jennifer was nodding her head, while she continued to shed crocodile tears.

Gordon put his arms around his mother's neck. "It's okay mommy. You can hold on to me. It'll be okay in a minute." 

He may have been 4 years old, but his mind was turning 40. He was the man of his family. 

I was going to turn Rod loose on his biological father. He was going to give up all parental rights to Gordon, or suffer the wrath of a lawyer he should not have messed with. After that was completed I was going to adopt Gordon and he truly would be my son. Rationally I couldn't believe it. I have never knowingly had sex; but here I was, sitting at a Wendy's restaurant with my future wife, and my future son; while my daughter was sitting at home waiting for my return. If this wasn't as weird as crashing an airplane into trees backwards, I guess nothing else would be.

************

21. AN EVEN SPECIAL

Jennifer dropped me off in front of the hospital. I warned my son he'd better not oversleep, or I would put him in his pillowcase and take him to Denver in it. I told my fiancé I would take her anyway I found her.

Jennifer replied, "Promises, promises, I want more than promises from you."

"Sunday night my dear, I will give you everything I have been saving up since puberty. You may set a record for natural insemination."

"I have an answer for that, but my son is here."

"Our son is here, right Gordon?"

"That's right daddy."

"You men are as thick as thieves."

"That's because we play baseball."

She tried to hit me, but sitting in the car made her swing awkward. It did not make the kiss I gave her awkward at all. I sent them on their way, and I smiled until they were out of sight.

I walked in to the hospital and Doctor Reed came rushing towards me smiling. "Doctor Luck I found her and she couldn't be in a better place if I planned it. She is at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester Minnesota. It is the finest orthopedic hospital in this country."

"Does she have a name Doctor's?"

"I'm sorry I was so excited to find her I forgot to give it to you. Her name is Elsie Hillman. She has more credentials after her name you would need an extra page to write them down. I called her, and she will take Michael as a patient. I am forwarding all the x-rays and MRIs to her so she knows what she's getting into. You will have to get a medevac aircraft to transfer him there. Michael's temperature is down. I believe you will be able to transport him in the next 12 hours. Do you think you will be able to make arrangements in that time?"

"Doctor, I will move heaven and earth to make that happen. Can I see him?"

"Yes, he is in ICU on the 4th floor."

************

His eyes were closed as I approached him. I was at the side of his bed when I said, "I should have left you in the forest. You are turning out to be one expensive friend. I have to rent you a medevac jet to get you to the Mayo Clinic. There is a doctor there who may be able to save your leg. If she can't I'm going to shove that thing so far up your ass it will come out your mouth."

"Go screw yourself Even. I was resting peacefully, until you walk into this room."

"Is that any way to talk to the man who walked 40 miles dragging you in a self- made rickshaw, after you questioned my parental lineage, sex, and stamina."

"40 miles my ass, it was probably more like 2 or 3."

"It was 40. Don't ask me how they did it, but the Air Force tracked your GPS signal and located the aircraft. From the wreckage site to Jennifer's home is 39.53 miles."

"I told you it wasn't 40 miles."

"Michael if you are not nice to me I am going to hit you in that leg."

"Go ahead Even, they have me on so many painkillers, I can't feel my arms."

"Listen to me you asshole, I am paying for everything, from aspirins to the rehabilitation center after your surgery. All you have to do is get well. I will not be with you, but you will have access to my phone number, and the phone number of my attorney. If anyone gives you a ration of shit, call Rod or me. I swear to you that person will rue the day he spoke to you in an unkind manner. I will be in Denver getting married. I will not put that off for one second. I don't want to give Jennifer a chance to get to know me and change her mind."

"You have a good heart and soul Even. Anyone who would do what you are doing for me, a virtual stranger, has nothing to worry about by getting married. She is the lucky one, not you."

"I'm glad you feel that way, but you have not met my bride. I do not know what I did to deserve her, but I will do everything in my power to keep her happy."

"You have already started down that road Even. You asked her to marry you, and she accepted. She knows you are quite a catch, and she will try to keep you happy as well."

"I am going to send you aircraft magazines when you get to Rochester. Pick out the twin-engine aircraft that you want. It will be on the tarmac waiting for you to fly it back to Fairbanks, when you are able. Don't disappoint me Michael. I will put your head through one of its propellers if you are not able to fly again."

"I will work hard to make that dream come true Even. Flying is the only thing I ever wanted to do."

"Remember Michael, if you need anything, anything at all, call, and you will have it. Maybe the next time you decide to crash an airplane you should hit the right rudder instead of the left. The passenger will get hurt instead of the pilot."

"You think of that now, while I'm lying in this bed? Why couldn't you have thought of that while we were still in the air?"

"Who would have made the rickshaw, certainly not you? You didn't have a clue as to what I was doing."

"Get out of here Even, you are depressing me. Thank you for everything you are doing for me. Can I ask you one more favor before you leave?"

"Yes, I told you that you could ask me for anything."

"Could you get me a pretty nurse for the medevac ride to Rochester?"

"I will get you the prettiest one available, and that's a promise."

"Thank you Even, when she bends over me to take my blood pressure, I will pinch her tits."

"I wouldn't advise it Michael. Remember she is the one who will have the pain medication. She is also the one with very long needles."

"I told you to get out of here, because you were depressing me. You have just ruined my entire day."

"Goodbye Michael, remember where your leg is going to be if you don't get well."

"Nurse get this idiot out of here, I am about to have a heart attack because of him."

A pretty young nurse approached his bed. "Would you hurry up and have one so I can transfer you to the cardiac unit. If you attempt to grab my ass one more time, I am going to put air in your IV line and watch you die."

"I see you know how to win friends and influence people Michael. If you keep it up you won't make it to Rochester."

"Even can I help it if she's frigid? I'm just trying to warm her up."

"Nurse, if you want to cure him of his grabby hands quickly, take his chart and smack his left foot with it. He will never touch you again."

"I will get you for that Even. If it's the last thing I do, I will get you for that."

"You are a genius Doctor Luck. There will not be a mark on his body, and it will be my word against his."

"You are very welcome. If that doesn't keep him in line, take a 3-inch needle, put it into his carotid artery, and attach it to a transfusion bag. Let him watch it fill up with his own blood. After two units he will get a little fuzzy. After three units he will beg you to put it back into him. He will promise you the moon, the stars, and the entire universe if you let him live."

"Even get out of here. You are pissing me off to the point suicide looks very appetizing."

"I am leaving Michael. Remember, you better get well or I am going to be your worst enemy."

"You are evil to the core Even."

"You told me I had a good heart and soul a few moments ago."

"If you leave now I will not retract that statement. If you stay, I will kick you with my good foot."

I shook Michael's hand and said goodbye with the admonition he had better get well.

He yelled one more time, "Even get out."

This time I did.

********

I stopped by the billing department and gave them Rod's billing address and phone number. I told them that Michael was not to see a bill. They were not to talk to him about the bill or anything about money. My attorney would take care of everything. If they wanted payment in advance of Michael leaving the hospital, call him now. Rod would wire the money to them, bank to bank.

Apparently my name carried a little assurance with them, because they did not ask for any money, until the insurance carrier paid first.

I asked for the number of the Air Force base operations officer and the hospital accountant gave it to me instantly. I called, and I was transferred to the senior officer in charge. I told him the problem I had with getting Michael to Rochester in a medevac jet. There was none available in Fairbanks except the one the Air Force had to transfer wounded Air Force personnel. It was sitting on the flight line at that moment doing nothing. I asked if I could use it for one day to transfer a patient to Rochester Minnesota for emergency surgery. I would pay triple the costs involved if they would allow me to use that aircraft.

"I'm sorry Doctor Luck, I can't approve that. It's for service personnel only."

"Thank you Captain, you will be getting a call from a Colonel very shortly."

I called the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs and spoke to a friend of mine, Colonel Bartholomew Masterson. I told him my problem, and he told me to call the Captain back in 10 minutes. I did.

"This is Doctor Luck, Colonel Masterson told me to call you and reference to the medevac aircraft."

The Captain was very haughty. "Yes sir I spoke to Colonel Masterson and he told me that you could use the jet. I called our base commander General Abrams, and he told me you couldn't. So Fuck off Doctor Luck, that aircraft is not moving."

"Would you call General Abrams and tell him to sit by his phone. In 30 minutes or less he will receive a phone call from General Reeves on the Joint Chiefs of Staff. If he doesn't answer by the 3rd ring he can expect to lose a star."

The Captain asked, "Who the fuck are you Doctor Luck?"

"You better get down on your God damn knees Lieutenant. I am the man who redesigned the nuclear triggers for the Minuteman 3 missiles. I made them smaller, cheaper, and more reliable. The Air Force loves me, especially General Reeves."

"Doctor Luck would you hold on for a moment."

I told the Captain/Lieutenant(I know I scared to shit out of him when I called him Lieutenant) he had exactly 60 seconds, before I hung up and called Virginia.

I looked at my watch and waited. 50 seconds later...

"Doctor Luck, you may use the medevac jet, and there will be no charge."

"Pick up the patient at the Fairbanks General Hospital 8 AM tomorrow. Deliver him to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester Minnesota. They will be expecting him. If anyone upsets Michael, everyone involved will lose a rank, including General Abrams. Is that understood?"

"Yes Doctor Luck, he will be treated with kid gloves."

Delicious would be very proud of me, because I had no idea who General Reeves was, except from the thank you note I received after I finished the project. I did redesign the nuclear triggers for the Minuteman missiles, and I made a bundle of money doing it. You have to love no-bid contracts.

*******

22. A HOMECOMING TO REMEMBER

The hard part of my day was over. I went back to that place called a hotel, and I got some sleep. In the morning, I showered, shaved, and put on my best summer wear. I looked out of place in Fairbanks Alaska. I felt cold, but great. 

I called a car rental agency and told them I needed a large car or truck. He gave me a list of what he had and I picked a GMC Yukon. He picked me up took me back to the agency, where I filled out all the forms paid with my American Express card and went to pick up Jennifer and Gordon.

Their luggage was on the front porch waiting for me. I guess they were as excited as I was to leave and head south to Denver.

Gordon heard me backing up the driveway. He came outside and guided me with hand signals to the luggage. He did a great job, except I nearly knocked over a post holding up the portico, because he did not stop me in time.

He yelled, "You are a little too close dad."

I pulled forward about four feet and asked, "How is that son?"

"It's perfect dad."

I loved the sound of that word.

I got out of the car, and walked to the rear to see how much room I had.

"You are right Gordon; it is perfect. Am I allowed to kiss my son for a job well done?"

He looked confused. "Do men kiss men dad?"

"Father's kiss their sons all the time Gordon, even when they are old and gray."

"Okay, you can kiss me."

I picked him up, kissed him on the head and cheek, and threw him up in the air.

He laughed on the way up, but was terrified on the way down because he didn't know I was going to catch him. When I did he said, "That was fun. No one ever did that with me before. Can you do it again?"

I did and he laughed on the way up. The problem was Jennifer walked out of the house, saw Gordon 5 feet above my head, and screamed, "Goorrrdooon!"

I caught my son on the way down, and he was still laughing. I set him down on the ground. He looked at his mother. "What are you worrying about mommy? Daddy was going to catch me."

She sighed. "It is going to take me a little time to get used to you playing with a man Gordon. I could never do that with you. When I saw you up in the air I thought I would die."

"We are men mommy. We do this stuff all the time. You watch television with me. The boys and girls jump high in the air, and they are caught on the way down."

I shook my head in disbelief. This 4 years old child had to be a midget in disguise.

"Lady, sir, are you ready to fly to Denver Colorado."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 06



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it notated now, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be a few and far between. This is going to be a "SHORT STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.' 

***** 

24. Clearing Up The Confusion 

"What's the matter baby? 

"They won't let me leave and I want to be with you. They are fitting me with my grandmother's dress, and they tell me they need more time to do it properly. At this moment I would rather marry you in a potato sack as long as I could be with you."  

"Will you be at the dinner tonight?" 

"I will be there if I have to rip this dress off my body." 

Her grandmother took the phone from her and spoke with me. 

"Doctor Luck, my granddaughter is acting like any newly engaged young woman. She is desperately in love with her young man, and wants to be with him. She will be at the dinner this evening, and she will be there on time. It's very natural for her to want to be with you, instead of being surrounded by a gaggle of young women, who have yet to find husbands of their own. I am very proud of my granddaughter. She made a mistake early in her life, and has redeemed herself wonderfully. She has proved herself to be a wonderful mother, and she has raised a wonderful son by herself." 

"Madam, I have many questions about the way your family treated Jennifer when she became pregnant and had Gordon without being married. I don't want to ask them now, because this is a very happy time for her and for me. There will come a day when I will ask those questions to the people involved, and I will get those answers. The people involved will not be happy with the way I handle it." 

"I agree with you Doctor Luck. Now is not the appropriate time to ask those questions. I want my granddaughters' day to be a happy one. We will arrange a time and day for you to ask those hard questions to the young women involved. We will see you at dinner this evening." 

"Thank you very much Mrs. Stars, I look forward to meeting you." 

****** 

The children were running around the back of the house having a wonderful time. Gordon fit right in with them. He was neither too big, nor too small. Once he understood the rules of the games they were playing, he became very good at it. Delicious brought out a thermos of lemonade and glasses. She yelled, "Who needs something to drink?" 

The game stopped, and most of the players ran towards her. Gordon walked. When he reached the area where Delicious was, there were still two children waiting in line ahead of him. He waited patiently, and received his drink from Delicious. 

"Weren't you thirsty Gordon? Why didn't you run like the other children?" 

"Yes, I was thirsty, but it didn't make sense to run, and get hotter than I was. I knew there would still be a few children online ahead of me when I got here." 

"Gordon, you are very smart." 

"Yes, I know. I was told you are very smart also. May I ask you a question, please?" 

"Absolutely, go right ahead." 

"Why do you call your father Uncle Even, instead of dad?" 

"There is a difference between an uncle and a father, Gordon. A father is the man who with your mother helped conceive you. He and your mother made you or me by combining the father's sperm and your mother's egg, and produced a child. An uncle is the brother of the father or the mother of that child. I know it's confusing for a child of your age to understand but you will as you get older." 

"I have understood that since I was two. I still don't understand why you call your father your uncle." 

"Why do you think that my Uncle Even is my father, Gordon?" 

"He didn't tell you what he found out when he was in Alaska?" 

"With everything that has happened since he came home today, we haven't had a lot of time to talk. Would you tell me what you heard my father talking about?" 

"Your father was trying to explain it to my mother. He said he just found out about it, and he was confused at how it could have happened. He said he never had sex with your mother. " 

"When did you over here this conversation?" 

"Two days ago, the day he came out of the forest and came to my house with his hurt friend. His friend was very sick. He spoke with my mom, while he was trying to keep his friend cool. He took all his friends clothes off, except the bandages on his leg. He kept wiping him down with water and alcohol. That stuff really smells bad. Then the helicopter came and took your dad and the pilot away. That's when my mom told me she was going to marry your dad. She was smiling, and very happy." 

"Your mommy believed what my daddy said." 

"Your daddy was telling the truth." 

"How could you tell?" 

"It was the way he was talking to my mommy and trying to help his friend, the pilot. You can't lie to one person and try your best to keep another person alive at the same time." 

"You are not smart Gordon, you are brilliant." 

"I know." 

************ 

After I got off the phone with Jennifer's grandmother, I asked Rod what Rosalynn was wearing to the wedding. 

In his usual offhanded way he replied, "Jeans and a T-shirt." 

My friend is much smarter in these cases than I am. His hands came up to protect his face, and he ducked in plenty of time to have my straight right hand go over his head. 

"One day Rod, your sense of humor is going to cost you a broken jaw. It's going to be very hard for you to defend me in court, when you can't talk." 

"Why would I defend you in court after you hit me?" 

"Dummy, you wrote our contract, read it. You are responsible to defend me in all lawsuits pending against me. I can't wait to see you cross-examining yourself. The papers should have a field day with that." 

"You are evil Even. What do you do stay up at night and read our contract just in case something such as this comes along?" 

"I haven't picked up our contract since the day you wrote it. It's in the vault at Wells Fargo gathering dust. I haven't been there in years. You can check the sign in cards to verify it." 

"I hate you people with photographic memories. It makes people like me, who have to study day and night to remember the miniscule portions of the law, feel inadequate." 

"Don't you ever leave me an opening like that again Rod. I could have driven a condominium through it. You should be happy you did not say that to Delicious. She would be running up and down your back, with steel spike track shoes on her feet, until she came out of your chest." 

"Delicious has changed you into an evil person. Before she came into your life you were an easy target. The Devils that inhabits her body have transitioned into yours. I don't like it; I am going to have Father McAuley do an exorcism before you get married. I want the old Doctor Even Luck back. He was easier to sneak up on and torment." 

"I will repeat what I told you before Rod. You forced me to go to Maine. You ordered me to go to Maine. You said what could possibly happen up there. Well my friend, 'You have sown the wind, and you shall reap the whirlwind." 

"Oh my Lord, Doctor Even Luck is quoting the Bible. Hosea 8: verse 7." 

"Rod I don't know what is scarier; me quoting the Bible, or you knowing chapter and verse." 

"Should we let Father McAuley settle the question?" 

"Let's leave him out of it for now. I want to get married in church Sunday afternoon. If I start asking him questions like that our discussion will not end for months to come." 

"Alright Even this conversation is to be continued at a later date. Are you hungry?" 

"Thank goodness you didn't ask that question with Delicious around. There would be a deficit in your checking account." 

"Who said I wasn't around, and yes I am hungry." 

"How did you find us?" 

"Gordon told me where you were going to be. 

She walked up to me, kissed me, and grabbed me by my shirt. "I believe we have something important to talk about, Don't We Dad!" 

Rod exclaimed, "Oh shit. Delicious before you jump to any conclusions, I have not shown the paperwork or your mother's diary to Even. I wanted both of you to sit down and see it together. I am the only one that knows the whole story. I thought it would be best for both of you to be together when I divulged your mother's secrets, and to understand why she lived the life she did. 

Even had no idea he was your father, until I spoke to him in Alaska. That was why he called you, and tried to hurry home to be with you. If you want to see the paperwork now, it is in my safe at home. If you want to wait until after the wedding, I can do that also. The choice is yours." 

"Did Gordon tell you how he knew you were my daughter?" 

"Uncle, I'm sorry, dad, he is photographic. He is a sponge. If he sees it or hears it, he remembers it. He overheard you telling Jennifer the story. He asked me why I didn't call you dad when you were my father. I told him you weren't my father, you are my uncle. He said no, daddy told my mommy that you were his daughter. I believed him and that's why I'm here." 

"Rod, I think we should go over the paperwork now. It is 4 o'clock, and we should have plenty of time to look it over." 

"Even you are forgetting about travel time. We would be cutting it very close." 

"Delicious what do you think?" 

"I don't want to rush looking everything over unc...dad. I want to take my time, especially reading mom's diary. We can do this tomorrow morning if that's alright with you." 

"This is a very private thing Rod. I want to do it at my place, without any interference. Is 9 AM okay with you?" 

"What is it with you Even? You never used to get up before 1 PM. All of a sudden, you are a morning person. I have to get Father McAuley to do that exorcism very soon." 

Rod saw it coming. His hands went up to protect his face, and his body went down to let her right hand go over his head. 

Delicious was smarter than Rod. She faked with her right hand, and hit him with a left uppercut. 

Rod went down. 

I stood there and applauded, as my friend looked up at me from the floor. If this was a 10 count, he was out. He was going to have a black and blue mark on his jaw for a week. His bigger problem was explaining it Roz. 

We helped him up, and held him until he had control of his stability. 

"I will remember that move for the next time Delicious. I never make the same mistake twice." 

"I can prove that you do Rod." 

"Go ahead, I'm listening." 

"You keep pissing me off, and I keep punishing you. When are you ever going to learn to be nice? Roz told you to stop this nonsense or she was going to cut you off. Do you want me to tell her that you have broken the status quo?" 

"You wouldn't do that to me. I would kill myself. She is the finest woman on the planet, and the best sex partner a man could ever want. If she cuts me off, I might as well be dead." 

"I won't do it this time, but behave, because you know I have a very short fuse." 

Without thinking Rod replied, "I didn't know you had a fuse. I thought you just exploded on contact." 

I smacked the back of Rod's head and told him to behave or he would never have sex again. 

It was then he realized what he had done, and apologized to Delicious. He said, "I'm sorry, it was a natural reaction." 

I asked my daughter when she realized Gordon was photographic. 

"I tested him with Rod's kids; names and ages. He asked me to make it harder, because this was boring. I moved the kids around, lay them down on the floor, so we couldn't use height as a cue, and asked him random questions about each child. He breezed through it. I asked him math, algebra, and geometric questions. This four-year-old made it look easy. I think he is smarter than I am dad." 

"You are scaring me Delicious. Three of us in the same household; what are we going to do, build a flying saucer in the backyard?" 

"You must admit we have all the talent to do it. You are the engineer, I want to make the propulsion unit, and Gordon will do the celestial math. We will let Jennifer pilot the craft, so she doesn't feel left out." 

"You two stop it. You are scaring me. I don't think Delicious is joking, because I really believe the three of you could do it." 

"I'm not joking Rod. It will take me 10 years to figure out the propulsion unit parameters. 

Even will need time to find an upgrade for the carbon elements for the exterior of the starship. 

The exact weight of the craft and size of the internal compartments will tell me how much space I will have for the propulsion unit. It will have to take us to .999 of the speed of light to get us anywhere near the closest star system. No one has figured out how to break the light speed barrier to date. Gordon may do that while we are building the ship. We will have to develop a way to put us into stasis. You may want to talk to your friend Patricia Valentino in Glens Falls to see if she wants to get on board this venture. She has the computer skills, and from what I've read online about her daughter, Laura, she may be better than her mother is. 

"How did you find out about Patricia?" 

"A little bird told me." 

"You are my daughter, I can spank you." 

"I am 17, I am unspankable." 

"Would you like to bet your delicate derrière on it?" 

"I was hoping you would say ass." 

"That will be $10 please." 

"I hate you. I just bit at my own joke." 

"Should I repeat my question, or has dementia taken over your head?" 

"Glens Falls is a very small town in upstate New York. It wasn't hard to find one of the two people were responsible for the patents to clean up the pollution around the planet. Harold Chase is the other computer expert that holds a patent on the process. Their skills could come in quite useful." 

I said to my daughter, "Their skills, or their money." 

It wouldn't be honest to say I hadn't thought about it, but we could live without their money, but their expertise would be nice to have." 

"I'll call Patti next week after the wedding. Okay?" 

"That's fine with me dad. That word does have a fine ring to it, doesn't it DAD. It means you going to have to pay to get my teeth straightened, and whitened. You are going to have to pay for my wedding, which I think I will have in the Seychelles' in the middle of winter. Of course, I'm going to want a summer home in Maui, and a winter home in Switzerland, a private jet at my disposal... 

As she walked back and forth in front of me, listing her dreams, which she will probably receive from me if she truly wants them, I decide to teacher a lesson in humility. She was talking like a spoiled brat, which I knew she is not. I wanted her to refocus her energies where they belonged. I positioned myself in a way to ensnare her. When she entered the target zone, my arm snaked around her waist trapping her. 

She screamed, because she knew she had crossed the invisible line, and she was in trouble. 

I bent her body in half over my knee, and began spanking her delicious derrière/ass. 

I struck her backside three times, full force, and counting, before she could get the first plea for mercy. 

"Even, please no more, I was only kidding." 

I was not fooling around, so I continued, until I reached 10. These were good hard shots I was giving her; not love taps. Her delicate skin would be bright red in moments. When she sat down on the wooden chairs in the Japanese restaurant, she would be in pain. When I stopped, and released her, both of her hands went to her sore backside. She looked at me with eyes so wide, you could not see the whites of her eyes. She was about to say something, when I interrupted her. 

"Would you like to use your smart mouth now and have me continue your punishment?" 

Several people stopped to see what was happening. Delicious stood there and desperately wanted to say something to me. She was probably using the scientific method to calm herself down. Her foot was tapping the ground like a metronome. 

Finally she said, "No dad, I think we will take this up, by computer, at another time." 

"That is an excellent decision on your part Delicious. If I started again I would not have held back." 

She stared at me with fire in her eyes, and doubt in her mind. I had hurt her both mentally and physically. It was the physical part that had her worried. If I did not hit her with everything I had the first time, what would it feel like if I let go and hit her with everything I had. This worried her greatly. Inside I smiled contentedly, because I had my daughter off balance. 

"Now, where were we? Oh yes, I'll call Patti next week, and get her read on this project. If she thought it was possible, or even probable I would ask her to speak with Harold Chase and Dycke Schneider to see if they would like to get involved. They are all big budget, big dream people, and all have been wildly successful in their business ventures. It will be good to get their input on our dream." 

Rod asked, "I don't want to burst your spatial bubble, but if they don't come on board where are you going to get the funds to build this thing?" 

Delicious replied, "Initially we will be laughed at, just like the dreamers at SpaceX were. We will proceed down the road, using our own funds, until people start to take notice that we are not fooling around. We will start to get sponsors, who want us to use their products in our craft. 

When we tell IBM that the Sequoia is too slow for our purposes they will go into hyper-drive to build something faster, as long as they can hitch a ride with us, and put their emblem on our posters. 

NASA will want to get aboard with the propulsion unit. They are still using hydrogen, with an oxygen exciter to get them into space. It's much too heavy and bulky for our purposes. I will be building something totally new from the ground up. If I can do that they will kiss me on all four cheeks. It will be solving a problem that they had been unable to solve since the Germans started throwing rockets at England in the Second World War. It is something I have always wanted to do. 

Boeing, Northrop/Grumman, General Dynamics, ITT, and that whole aviation research group will start to fund us with avionics for the 22nd century. They will make a quantum leap in celestial navigation that is unheard of now, just as GPS was unheard of when the Mercury, Gemini, and Apollo Missions flew. It will be the difference between Neil Armstrong landing on the moon, in the Eagle, which had a plywood floor, and less computing power than today's cell phones, to the space shuttle, which made that leap in technology in less than 20 years. This is going to be fun dad. It is going to be a blast. When you patent bending radio waves, and it goes viral, it could fund this project by itself." 

I looked at my daughter and smiled. "You really want to do this don't you baby?" 

"It solves several of your mental problems with me." 

"Oh, what problems do I have with you?" 

"Do you want the long list, or the short list?" 

"Why don't you give me the short list for now? I don't want to be late for dinner." 

"Okay, here is part of the short list." 

"1. You don't want me to leave the nest. 

2. You don't trust me when I am out of your sight. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 06



3. You don't trust me when I am near a boy. 

4. You don't trust me when a boy is near me. 

5. You don't like me because my IQ is higher than yours. 

6. You don't like me because I make you get up early in the day. 

7. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't he talking to women. 

8. If it weren't for me you wouldn't be getting married. 

9. If it weren't for me, we wouldn't be excited about building a spaceship, and all the new patents that will come along with it. 

Is that enough for today, or should I continue?" 

"May I respond to your shortlist?" 

"Do you want me to write them down so your dementia ridden mind can remember them?" 

"No, I believe I can do it by myself. 

Question 1, you are correct. 

Question 2, you are correct. 

Question 3, you are correct. 

Question 4, you are correct. 

Question 5, you are incorrect. 

Question 6, you are incorrect. 

Question 7, you are correct. 

Question 8, you are incorrect. 

Question 9, you are correct. 

Out of nine questions, you have three incorrect answers. You are back at your high school level. Your grade is 66 2/3. You have failed the test." 

"I demand a recount, because as always you are lying. I would like you to act as an impartial observer Rod. He said that question number five is incorrect. He doesn't like me because my IQ is higher than his. You know everything about my father. What is his IQ?" 

"She has you Even. I have to tell her. Your father's IQ is 207." 

"You bastard. 

"That will be $10 please." 

"We tied, that's not fair." 

"It is fair. You said your IQ was higher than mine. It is not; it is equal to mine." 

"I don't like you dad." 

"Doesn't that word have a nice ring to it Delicious?" 

"I hope Jennifer puts that ring through your nose." 

"Jennifer committed a misdemeanor, and I promised to spank her because of it. You are very close to that line again. I will spank you again right now if you wish." 

"Oh shit." 

"That will be $20 please." 

"If you keep this up, I'm going to need a raise." 

"If you keep this up, I'm going to wash your mouth out with soap." 

"Can we get something to eat, please? I would like to put something in my mouth besides my foot." 

Rod laughed. "It is nice to see you in trouble with him instead of me. What would you like to eat?" 

"There is a Japanese restaurant across the street." 

I started laughing. Suddenly I was in pain, she kicked my ankle again. I would be limping as I crossed the street, only to laugh when Rod received the bill. 

25. Dinner With A Twist 

It was a different woman who launched herself at me and into my arms this time, and shouted my name, "Even." 

Jennifer and I wound up in an embrace several feet from the exit of the elevator, where I was waiting for her. She wasn't late, but she was pushing the words "on time" very closely. 

I refused to let her go, and she wasn't going anywhere either. 

Rod stuck his head close to ours and asked, "Would you two like a room?" 

Jennifer said, "Yes." I said, "Dammit, No." 

Jennifer looked at me with love in her eyes. "Sir, I hope your insurance is paid up, because you may not live through Sunday night." 

"Madam, I walked 40 miles to get to your house. I will survive not only Sunday night, but many Sunday nights for years to come." 

"If you two could break apart now; you are the guests of honor, and there is a room full of people waiting for you to make your entrance." 

"Rod sometimes you are a pain in the ass." 

"Even, if you had started dating when you were 16 instead of 33, it wouldn't be so hard for you to put your young lady on her own two feet and let her walk." 

"I didn't realize I was holding her off the floor. I thought she grew." 

Jennifer smacked me on my shoulder, and giggled as I let her stand beside me. 

"Is there a protocol on which side Jennifer is supposed to be on?" 

"If she is going to run the family, she is on the right. If you are going to run the family you are on the right." 

"Jennifer you would you stand on my right please." 

"Even, you are very smart man." 

"Have you ever doubted that Rod?" 

Rod walked in to the room to announce our arrival. When he did, I wanted to kill him again. 

"Ladies, gentlemen, and honored guests, it only took Jennifer six hours to do it but she finally succeeded. After all these hours of training, they have finally made it here, and my good friend Even Luck knows where her breasts are." 

The room exploded with laughter and so did Jennifer. For you in the field of science, and who have known him for these many years, you must already realize what a giant leap this is for Doctor Luck. He has never been able to speak to a woman, no less look below her neck to see what was there. So, without further ado, here they are Jennifer Stars and the newly enlightened, Doctor Even Luck." 

I don't know what you call 13 musicians, an orchestra, or a band, but they started playing as we walked in. There was a combination of laughter and applause. As I closed in on Rod in the center of the dance floor I tried to pull my hand away from Jennifer. She would not let me go. 

"I was only going to kill him once." 

"Do it on your own time, this is our time." 

Rod handed me the microphone and told me to say a few words to the guests. 

I decided I would kill him twice. He knew I hated to speak in public. 

I looked at the area where my colleagues were sitting, and decided to have some fun with them. 

"Fellow members of the scientific community, I want to set the record straight for my friend Rod Laver, and some of you who have not gotten to know me yet. I have always known that females had breasts. I just thought they were on the other side."  

If any of you thought scientists were a staid group of men and women, who wore thick glasses and pocket protectors, you would not believe it tonight. Their reaction to my little joke drew catcalls, hoots, hollars, and screams of laughter worthy of any great standup comedian. It brought the house down, as they say. 

Rod was so caught off guard by the humor he didn't think I had in me; he was lying on the floor laughing, applauding, and crying at the same time. 

The orchestra/band started playing, "Someone To Watch Over Me." Jennifer took my hands and said, "Dance with me." 

"I don't know how." 

"It's very easy. Hold me close, and move your body with mine." 

I held her tight, and prayed she had feet left when the song finished. I moved around the floor following her lead. As our bodies rubbed against each other, a small problem excitedly became a very large problem. 

Jennifer looked up into my eyes, and asked, "Would you like to change your mind about getting a room?" 

"I would love to, but I promised God and you that I would wait until after we were married. I will not break that vow." 

"Even Luck, I adore you." 

"Jennifer Stars, you can say whatever you like, I am still going to spank you." 

"Meany!" 

Oh was I in love. We continued swaying back and forth, until I saw a handsome young man, from the science side of the room, approach my daughter. I was about to break off the dance, and rescue her from the male of the species, but Jennifer would not let me go. She saw the same thing I did. 

"Leave her alone, daddy." 

"But..." 

"If you let go of my arms, I am going to kick you in the butt. She is in a room with 169 other people. He is not going to do anything untoward to her. They are only going to dance" 

"How little you know about men. Dancing leads to dating. Dating leads to cuddling, and cuddling leads to the loss of her virginity. I will not allow that happen." 

"When will you allow that to happen to a young lady in the prime of growing up, and her hormones raging?" 

"40 sounds like a good number to me." 

"Even you are a scientist, and you know more about everything than any man I have ever met. What is the average age of a girl losing her virginity?" 

"I refuse to answer on the grounds that you may kill me before our wedding." 

"Darling if you don't answer my question there will be no wedding." 

"You wouldn't do that to us. We love each other too much to be apart." 

"I have lived without a man in my life since I was 19 years old, and became pregnant. I will be hurt, but I will survive." 

"16 years, 4 months and 23 days; 16 percent become pregnant. 42 percent get abortions, 36 percent have their babies and keep them, and 22 percent put them up for adoption, both legal and illegal." 

"Is there anything you do not know?" 

"Yes, I didn't know if you are serious about leaving me. I couldn't stand the thought of losing you." 

"I would rather lose both arms, than leave you, Even. It was the best threat I could come up with at the time." 

"I was very frightened I could lose you. However, you deserve another spanking for scaring me to death." 

"Look Even they are dancing, they are not screwing on the dance floor; isn't that wonderful." 

"You distracted me. That was unfair." 

"It is a normal female tactic. A man can rarely do two things at one time with a woman in his arms." 

"I will remember that for the next time. Did you know Gordon has a photographic memory?" 

"No, I just thought he was very smart for his age. How do you know?" 

"Delicious tested him. She called him a sponge. You tell him or show him something, and he can repeat it back to you verbatim. That's how she found out I was her father. Gordon repeated the entire story I told you while I was working on Michael. He asked her why she was calling me Uncle Even, when I was her father. 

"I bet that knocked her socks off." 

"There's a funny part of it too. Delicious went through the whole process from intercourse through producing a baby to explain to him how I was her uncle. She said to him you will understand it as you get older." 

Gordon replied, "I understood that since I was two. I think that is what convinced Delicious he was photographic." 

"Oh my God, I used to take baths with him. He could probably tell you exactly what I look like." 

I moved away from her by a few inches and started to say 'Gor...' when she slapped her hand over my mouth. 

"You wouldn't dare." 

"You threatened to leave me. Don't tell me what I wouldn't dare to do." 

"I'm beginning to understand why Delicious says she doesn't like you so often. I'm beginning not to like you." 

"You don't have to like me, as long as you love me." I pulled her closer and kissed her. 

Unbeknownst to me the music had stopped. The people around us stopped dancing, looked at us, and started applauding. 

Jennifer turned a bright pink as she blushed. I put my head against hers, and told her it would always be like this for us. 

Delicious and the young man she was dancing with came over to us, and pulled us apart. "Hey you two, cut it out. Dinner is ready to be served, and everything is getting cold because of this hideous display of public intimacy." 

"I took her hand and said, "Young lady you and I have to talk." 

"Dad before you chop my head off for dancing, 'WITH A MAN,' I would like to introduce Doctor Grayson Thyme, of the Johnson Space Flight Center, in Houston." 

I looked at this 'TEENAGER' and knew he had to be lying. He could not be 20 years old. I took an instant dislike to the man, because he was trying to get into my baby's pants. 

I shook his hand and asked, "How are things at the International Space Station going?" 

"I have no idea Doctor Luck. I'm working on Orion, the manned mission to Mars. Right now we are three years behind schedule because we don't have a rocket with enough power to get it into an earth orbit high enough to slingshot it to a Mars trajectory. Even the Russians don't have a rocket powerful enough to do it. If we don't overcome that problem, every dollar we are putting into the capsule will be wasted." 

"Did Delicious tell you about the project we are undertaking?" 

"No, I didn't know if she would understand the simple things I was talking to her about." 

I grabbed her before she could hit him. 

"Doctor, do not ever make that mistake again, or you will be getting up off the floor, possibly missing a mouthful of teeth. Delicious has an IQ of 207." 

"207 shit that's higher than mine. Where was she tested?" 

"She was tested by a government agency twice. You don't have to know their name." 

"Oh them, they tested me also. They told me I didn't fit in to their plans." 

"They told Delicious the same thing. It was great news for us, because we are about to start on a project that will take us to the stars, not just to Mars. We are funding it privately. She will be developing the propulsion system, without using hydrogen and oxygen. I will be making the design prototype. And a four-year-old boy will be doing most of the math involved. Don't just look at the package the next time. Believe in the product that comes out of it." 

"What type of propulsion system are you going to use?" 

Delicious smiled when he gave her that opening. "I'm sorry Doctor it is so far over your head, I am afraid you wouldn't understand it." 

Doctor Thyme dropped his head, and laughed. "I guess I deserved that one, didn't I." 

"It gave me great pleasure to do that to you. It means I won't have to hit you at some later date for insulting me." 

"Listen people, we are standing in the middle of the dance floor drawing attention to ourselves. Soon half of the scientists in this room will be standing next to us to trying to find out what we are talking about. If you want to continue this discussion, we will do it Monday, if I am alive." (Dammit, I forgot to duck.) 

Doctor Thyme and Delicious both laughed, I just looked at Jennifer and rubbed the back of my head. 

"I will get you for that." 

"Are we getting a room, or are we waiting until Sunday?" 

"I am beginning not to like you. I love you, but I am beginning not to like you." 

"Delicious does he always repeat himself after he gets hit?" 

"Why don't you hit him again and find out." 

"Baby girl do you remember what happened to you in front of the clothing store? It could be repeated on the dance floor." 

"No thank you; my ass has not recovered from the first spanking." 

"Thank you very much, that will be $10 please." 

"I hate it when you do that to me." 

"I love it when I do that to you. Doctor Thyme would you escort my daughter to her seat please before she cannot sit down." 

"I thought she was your niece?" 

"It's a long story Doctor, and I just found out about it two days ago. I haven't seen the proof yet, but my lawyer has and he assures me that it's true. I would like you to keep it under your hat until I verify everything." 

"Miss Delicious, I would like to reserve the first dance after dinner, and the second and the third. Actually I would like to reserve all of them for the rest of the evening." 

I was about to say, "NO" when I was hit in the back of the head by two hands simultaneously. 

Jennifer replied, "Doctor she accepts." 

Delicious had a smile on her face that could have lit up the room. I turned to my fiancée and growled. 

She in turn took me into her arms and kissed me until I could not remember why I was angry. 

When I came out of my stupor, Delicious was seated at our table, and Doctor Thyme was talking to other scientists. 

Jennifer said, "Come on lover, it's time to eat." 

"What happened that am I forgetting." 

"If the famous Doctor Even Luck has forgotten something, it could not be important." 

"You're right, let's have dinner." 

As we approached our table Delicious had a worried look on her face. It disappeared into a smile. I couldn't understand why, because I didn't see this happen. 

Rod asked me, as we were leaving the party, why Jennifer gave the 'Thumbs Up' sign to Delicious as she approached our table. He wanted to know what it was all about. That was when my mind cleared, and Jennifer yelped. 

She laughed at me and said, "It took you long enough." 

"I am going to have to watch out for your hypnotic kisses. They could be hazardous to my health." 

"It wasn't your health you were worried about. It was your daughters, and she is flying high. Look at her; you couldn't wipe that smile off her face if you tried." 

"That is not what I'm worried about remember? I told you Dancing leads to Dating. Dating leads to cuddling, and cuddling leads to the loss of her virginity. She's too young, maybe not in years but in experience. I have to protect her from herself." 

"Even from the little you've told me about her, if someone tried to do something to her that she didn't want he would be in trouble, not her." 

"Jennifer a little while ago you kissed me and I forgot everything that was going on around me. I am 33 years old, Delicious is only 17. If it happened to me, it could happen to her just as easily." 

"Do you trust her at all?" 

"If there was ever a loaded question, you just asked it. Yes, I trust her." 

"If you do, take her off the leash and let her grow." 

"When did you get so smart?" 

"The day I found out I was pregnant. My parents kept me on such a tight leash, while I was growing up, I had to have sex whenever and wherever I could. I wasn't promiscuous, but I loved sex. Then Tom came into my life. He was 25, and he swept me off my feet. I was a freshman in college. It was my first year away from home. I was as free as a bird, and I could do whatever I wanted. Four months later I was pregnant with Gordon, and Tom was gone. I had to drop out of school, and tell my parents I was pregnant. Believe it or not they did not blame me. They blamed themselves. They realized they reigned me in so tightly, they didn't allow me time grow up. Then they shipped off to college, where I had total freedom, but I was unprepared for life. 

Gordon became the light of their lives. My parents helped me raise him. They taught me how to become independent, and how to run their businesses. 

Then my dad's mother passed away. My parents were driving to her funeral when they were involved in a multicar accident on Interstate 70. My dad was killed instantly, my mother walked away without a scratch. My dad's mother left me a huge trust fund, which I will get when I turn 25. My father's estate was split between my mother and I. 7 months after the accident, my mother was diagnosed with uterine cancer. She died last year. Very few members of my family showed up at her funeral, just my grandmother, and a few of my aunts and uncles. I never felt so lonely in my life. I don't believe I have ever told the entire story to anyone." 

I held her in my arms as she cried. I kissed the top of her head, and told her I was honored she revealed everything to me. 

She placed her head against my chest and said, "You are still not getting laid until Sunday night." 

"Wasn't that my position?" 

"I thought you were a virgin? How could you possibly know about positions?" 

"Lady, you are asking for a beating." 

Her grandmother walked over to us and said, "That's enough for one night you two. My granddaughter is coming with me. I have to keep you safe from her so you may keep your honor Doctor Luck. I trust you completely; it's my granddaughter that you have to worry about." 

"Grandma!" 

"Come with me young lady, we have fitting in the morning. You can see each other later in the afternoon." 

"You are absolutely correct Madam. She has been trying to get me in bed all night. Take her away before I submit." 

It was Jennifer's turn to growl. "This is going to be the shortest marriage on record. I am going to kill you Sunday night." 

"As long as I die with a smile on my face as large as Delicious' and I have an open casket, it will be worthwhile." 

"Bastard." 

"I know both my parents." 





There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 06



"Even Luck, you are dead man." 

"Mrs. Stars, you heard her. If anything untoward happens to me, and I am not alive Monday morning, you can point the finger directly at your granddaughter." 

"Doctor Luck is there a category in the criminal code for "Death by Fornication?" 

"I'm not sure. You will have to ask Rod that question. Good night baby, dream of me, because I will be dreaming about you. Gordon will be spending the night with me." 

"No, he's never been away from me." 

"A few moments ago you ask me if I trusted someone. Do you trust me?" 

"Bastard." 

"Is there an echo in here, I thought I heard that word a few minutes ago." 

"Make sure your computer is locked. If he gets a hold of it you are in trouble." 

"No, I think I'll let him play with Sequoia and see where he takes it. It should be educational for all of us. Good night." 

"I want you to sleep with this on your mind Even; I don't like you." 

"I want you to go to sleep with this on your mind Jennifer; I love you." 

"Bastard." 

"There's that echo again." 

Her grandmother pulled her into the elevator; otherwise this conversation would have lasted until the wee hours of the morning. As soon as she was gone, the other women in my life attacked. 

"Isn't he dreamy dad? He couldn't stop apologizing for underestimating me all night. We talked about Quantum Mechanics, Fuzzy Metric Space, Expansion Method of Solving Non-Linear PDE in Mathematical Physics, and a whole bunch more. I think I knocked his socks off, because I knew as much as or more than he did. He asked me out on a date. I said, "Yes." She put her hands against her ears and said, "Don't yell at me." 

"Why would I yell at you? You have the right to make your own decisions." 

She took her hands away from her ears and stared at me. 

"Would you mind repeating that to me?" 

"Why would I yell at you? You have the right to make your own decisions." 

"Dad, are you feeling all right?" 

"Yes, I'm feeling fine. How are you? You seem happy, a little confused, but happy?" 

"Dad, you do realize Gray is a boy." 

"Boy or girl, it's your choice." 

"Rod is this really my father, a robot, or a clone. He is answering all my questions wrong." 

Rod whispered, "Do you know that dark-haired beauty your father is marrying. She has cast a spell over him. Take advantage of it while you can." 

"Dad can we build a spaceship in our backyard?" 

"I thought we already decided to do that." 

"Good, I would have hated it if you forgotten about that. Let's go home; we have to pick up Gordon at Rod's house." 

"I've decided to let Gordon play with Sequoia. I want to see what he does with it." 

"Dad, we are looking at a 'Brave New World' if he does what he's capable of doing." 

"He won't be ready yet, but I want him to get used to the machine. There's no sense in having him start on something smaller. Maybe you'd like to invite 'Gray' along to see what he does?" 

"You're kidding, right; a boy sleeping in the same house as me?" 

"In the same house Delicious, not in the same bed." 

Delicious nearly tore my head off as she jumped up to kiss me. Then she ran off to find Doctor Grayson Thyme. 

If she pulled him by the arm any harder, it would've been out its socket any second. 

"Gray my father wants to ask you something?" 

I looked at her and shook my head. 

"Doctor Thyme, I am going to turn a four-year-old young man loose on a Sequoia computer. Would you like to come along and watch what he does with it?" 

"Hell, I would like to get my hands on a Sequoia. What is a four-year-old going to do with it?" 

"I don't know, but I'm willing to find out. This young man is exceptional, probably as exceptional as you were when you were growing up." 

Delicious jumped in and asked with innocent eyes, "What do you like for breakfast Gray. I can make almost anything." 

His decision was made as her eyelashes fluttered. "I would love to see this young man at work. (It wouldn't have mattered if I said Gordon was going to play in the sandbox. His eyes were focused on Delicious. I didn't care what Jennifer said, I was sleeping in the hallway tonight.) 

********* 

"Gordon the computer I'm going to let you use is not a toy. It is used for scientific purposes. You can try anything you want on it, but I want you to remember that okay." 

"Where is the computer dad, all I see is the keyboard?" 

I took my son for a little walk around the working space, down a short corridor, around the fire suppression system, and past the electronic safe. I pointed to the computer and said, "This is the fastest computer in the world, at this moment. Its name is Sequoia. The company that builds it is IBM." 

"This is much bigger than my old computer. I could hold mine on my lap." 

"Your computer was for fun. This computer is for work. Why don't you try to use some of your math skills, and see how far you can go?" 

"Gee dad that sounds like fun." 

"Math and science are always fun, son." 

"Delicious why don't you sit at Station 1, Gray sit at Station 2, I will stay with Gordon at Station 3." 

He didn't start and he blew me away. "Dad show me which function keys to use for physics." 

Gray's head nearly snapped off his head. "Tell me he didn't say that." 

"Would you like our relationship to start out with a lie?" 

"I think I'm going to be sick. I didn't get into physics until I was eight." 

And so it began for the next hour Gordon attacked Sequoia with a slow steady stream of numbers and symbols as fast as his tiny fingers could take him across the keyboard. I wrote a note on a whiteboard for Delicious. SAVE! She did. Some of what he put down on the screen was rudimentary physics. Other portions of it I did not understand. I was not taking any chances that he was wrong, I would have to decipher it later, just in case he was ahead of me. Some savants were like that. After an hour I said to Gordon, "My son that is excellent work. However now you have something else to do." 

He looked at me expectantly, and said, "What is that dad?" 

"You have to go to bed. It's way past time for you to go to sleep. Your mother is going to kill me if she finds out you were up until midnight." 

"Can I stay up for another hour, I won't tell her. This is so much fun." 

"No, we will not lie to your mother. It's a bad thing to do, and someone could get a spanking. I do not want it to be me. The computer will be here tomorrow and a whole bunch of tomorrow's afterward. You can play with it every day. Okay?" 

"Do you promise?" 

"Every day Gordon, I promise." 

"Can I get a piggyback ride to bed?" 

"I think I can handle that. Hop on board." For the first time in my life I took my son up two flights of stairs to my bedroom. I threw him up in the air and let him bounce on the bed. He laughed like a child of four, not like a brilliant mathematician. That made me happy. 

"Again dad." 

"No, get undressed. We will wash you up and get you into your pajamas. You will sleep with me tonight." 

I didn't forget about Delicious and Doctor Grayson Thyme. I remembered what Jennifer said to me about growing up. As I thought about my previous protestations I knew they were unrealistic. If I put a squadron of tanks around her and enterprising suitor could dig a hole and snatch her away underground. I could give her advice, but I could not live her life for her. 

******** 

I did not so much here little feet leaving the room, as I felt my son trying to sneak out of the room. 

"Little person where do you think you're going?" 

"Downstairs dad, Delicious is making breakfast." 

My head popped off the pillow to see my clock. It was a quarter after six. Someone was up to no good, and it wasn't me. 

"Go ahead Gordon; I'll be down in a few moments." 

My Coitus Interuptus squad was on his way. His father would be there shortly. I dressed and shaved quickly to make myself look presentable, and closed my bedroom door. Delicious' door was slightly open. I saw every color red in the rainbow, when I noticed her bed had not been slept in. Doctor Grayson Thyme was going to die before breakfast. 

Delicious heard me coming down the stairs. She met me there. 

"We did not sleep together. Well, we did and we didn't." 

"There is no in between, either you did, or you didn't." 

"It's not like that dad." 

"Enlighten me Delicious, before I serve him for breakfast." 

"We were sitting on the couch and I guess I got tired and leaned against him and fell asleep. So did he, and that's the way we woke up this morning." 

"Baby, I am going to try not to interfere with your life. I am not going to make it all the time, like this morning. I worry that you are not ready for this big bad world of ours. Go slow, like Duncan told you to do. Be as smart with your body as you are in your mind. They will both serve you well." 

"Thanks dad, I love you too." 

"I love you too. What's for breakfast?" 

"Waffles." 

"I'm sure Gordon will have a wonderfully messy time with those." 

Gray asked me why I had all the security around the house. 

"Do you know the work I do here and sometimes who I do it for?" 

"I didn't realize that Doctor." 

"Has delicious filled you in on what we plan to do, and how we plan to do it?" 

"Yes she has. She's either out of her mind, or smarter than Newton. I never thought of the possibility of falling up." 

"Delicious would you like to invite him to my other surprise party?" 

"I would love to dad, but you said that it was for smart people only." 

"Delicious that is enough. You got your shot in yesterday, and I don't want to hear another word." 

"Okay, I'm sorry Gray. Can I tell him about it dad, because he's going to say it's not possible." 

"Gray put $10 on the table." 

"Should I ask why?" 

"It's a family rule. When someone curses, $10 goes into the pretzel jar." 

He put the $10 on the table, and said, "Okay now what?" 

"Gordon come here and sit on daddy's lap." 

"Is Doctor Thyme going to say a bad word?" 

"Yes, possibly several of them." 

"Okay, you can put your hands over my ears." 

"Gray is it possible to bend radio waves?" 

"No radio waves travel in a straight line." 

"My dad has already done it." 

"You're out of your fucking mind. No one can break a scientific truth." 

"Gray you can put your $10 into the pretzel jar. Delicious we have to get more suckers like him. We could be millionaires." 

"Dad, you already are." 

"Oh yes, I forgot about that. Gray rules are made to be broken. From the earliest human endeavor to the beginning of writing in the south of the Sudan man has made leaps and bounds that have changed science every generation. 70 years ago there was no such thing as open-heart surgery. 50 years ago there was no such thing as a heart transplant. 30 years ago no one thought they could break the human genome code. 20 years ago nobody thought about cellular regeneration. 10 years ago no one thought of using gene therapy to cure illnesses. What I have done is just the next practical step in scientific advancement. Delicious is going to do the next step; and this little wonder sitting in my lap is going to take us to the stars." 

Gordon tapped me on my hand. "Daddy has he finished saying bad words yet?" 

I took my hands off his ears. "Yes he's finished; you can go back and finish a breakfast now." 

"When I'm finished can I go play with Sequoia?" 

"Not with the sticky fingers you can't. We will take a shower, and get you dressed for the day. Then Doctor Thyme will take you downstairs at 9 AM and you can play with Sequoia. Is that okay?" 

"Yes, thank you dad." 

Gray asked, "How can you bend radio signal?" 

"If I tell you, you may patent it before I do. I have a demonstration coming up in six weeks with the heads of three major corporations, and a few dark agencies. Would you like to be there to see how it works?" 

"The 101st Airborne Division couldn't keep me away." 

"Delicious will call you with the time and day. We will be on one side of Republican Mountain, and the receivers will be in the Valley on the other side. I will have the best government single sideband, VHF, UHF, HF, and ultralow frequency radios with me for tests to prove that none of them works on getting their transmissions through the mountains. Then I will attach each of them, one at a time, to my pride and joy. Every one of them will work." 

"Even you are fucking out of your mind." 

"Daddy he said another bad word. He owes you $10." 

"No Gordon, he owes the pretzel jar $10." 

"Doctor Luck living in this house could turn out to be very expensive." 

"Delicious knows that only too well, don't you dear?" 

"Oh no dad, you are not getting me to bite at 7:30 in the morning. That damn jar has three weeks of my salary in your pocket." 

"Since I pay your salary, I wish to thank you very much for your free labor." 

"Fuck off dad. God dammit you did it again." 

"Gordon how much does Delicious owe the pretzel jar?" 

"Does dammit count?" 

"In this case it does because she used God in front of it." 

"Delicious you owed the pretzel jar $20." 

"Gordon if you weren't so handsome I would say I didn't like you, but I do." 

"Dad why wouldn't she like me, I didn't do anything wrong; she did." 

"That's because she's not as smart as you. Are you finished your breakfast, you look sticky enough?" 

"Yes, I'm finished." 

"Okay, let's get ready for the day." 

************ 

26. A TALE OF TWO LOVES 

"I am at the front gate let me in." 

"Who are you and what do you want?" 

"Delicious it isn't 9 o'clock in the morning. Don't start with me. I will tear all this paperwork up and burn your mother's diary if you do." 

"If you touch that diary I will skin your dick layer by layer until I get down to the veins. Then I will tie each one of them off and you will watch your dick turn black. Do you hear me Rod?" 

"Do you remember the words you said to me in front of the clothing store: STATUS QUO? If you are nice to me I will be nice to you." 

The posts went down, and gate opened. As he waited for the second gate to open Delicious said, "It's no fun when we can't argue Rod." 

"I know, but if we get caught, I don't get laid. If I don't get laid I did rather be dead." 

"Come on in, Doctor Grayson Thyme is still here." 

"That's amazing; I thought he would be buried in the back 40 by now." 

******** 

Rod walked into the house with a briefcase and several large folders in his hand. He walked straight into the living room and put his packages down, before entering the kitchen and saying hello to Delicious and Gray. 

"Don't tell me he sleeping." 

"No he's getting Gordon ready for the day." 

"I never thought I would see the day that bumbling idiot would take to fatherhood so easily." 

"Gordon do you want to hit him or should I?" 

"You better do it dad, if I hit him he will cry." 

"Gordon I know you are very bright, but you are not that strong." 

"Dad would it be all right if we have him put in $10 on the table." 

"Is he going to say a bad word?" 

"Probably three dad." 

"Rod put $10 on the table. If you don't say a bad word you get everything that's in the pretzel jar, plus the two $100 bills that are under it." 

Rod could not get a $10 bill out of his wallet quick enough. 

"Come on little man, let's see what you have." 

Gordon walked over to Rod, and knelt on the floor. He rolled up Rods' right pant cuff, until it was just above his ankle. 

"Mister Laver are you ready?" 

Rod was sure Gordon was going to kick him in the ankle. He spread his legs to get his balance, and said, "Go ahead little man, give it everything you have." 

Gordon stepped back about six feet. "Here I come." He started running as fast as he could, and at the very last second he hit Rod in the balls. 

"Oh Fuck!" Rod groaned as he folded like a house of cards, and fell to the floor. He grabbed his groin and said, "Shit that hurt. I'm going to kill that little fucker." 

Gordon was hiding behind me as everyone in the room laughed their asses off. 

Delicious brought Rod a glass of water. 

Gray was having a hard time controlling himself, because a four-year-old boy had faked out a 33-year-old man. 

I could not have been prouder of my son. I picked up Gordon and asked, "Where did you learn that trick?" 

"Julius Caesar used that tactic all the time, especially when he was in Gaul. He would make his forces in the center, thin but long to make his enemy think that was all the men he had. When the enemy attacked his center, the cavalry would come at them from both sides, eventually encircling them. If they didn't give up, the Romans killed them all." 

"Where did you get this information?" 

"I read it in a book in the library, when mommy visited a college." 

"Do you remember the name of the book?" 

"Yes, de Bello Gallico. It means the Gallic Wars." 

"You read it in English right?" 

"No, I read it in Latin." 

The room became deathly quiet as everyone looked at Gordon. 

"Doctor Thyme do you have any questions?" 

"I want my mommy." 

Even said, "That about sums up my feelings." 

Gray would you take Gordon downstairs and let him play with Sequoia. Please save whatever he puts on the computer so we can analyze it later. It may take me weeks to do." 

"It will be my pleasure Doctor Luck. Come on Gordon, there is a computer named after a tree waiting for you to play with it." 

Rod was still holding his family jewels when he said, "A four-year-old who read Caesar's Gallic Wars, in Latin. I agree with Gray, I want my mommy." 

"Delicious there will be no sex manuals in this house. If that boy gets a hold of the Kama Sutra the female population west of the Mississippi is in trouble." 

"Single or married?" 

"Both." 

"Thank God he's only four; he has nine more years until he reaches puberty." 

"We have to finish the ship before then, and be on our way. As long as he is in stasis, the female of our species is safe from being pregnant at the same time. The population explosion would be massive." 

"What do you think will happen if we find a planet with humanoids like us?" 

"If Einstein is correct, and we retain our age while we are asleep, he will still be 13. That will give him possibly 50 or 60 years of fertility. He and his offspring will do a very good job of changing the genome structure of the planet. They will all be six feet tall, with black hair, have black eyes, and be gorgeous. You will do your share Delicious, by helping the men of the planet." 

"Very funny dad; from a virgin to a prostitute in 17 light-years." 

"It's all in the name of science dear." 

"Are you going to share Jennifer?" 

"Are you out of your mind, she is my wife." 

"Dad, it's all in the name of science." 

"Well, since you put it that way, I think I'll get a paddle and beat you with it." 

"Are you two finished yet? 

"No, you still have to put $20 more in the pretzel jar. You said three bad words just like Gordon predicted." 

"I don't like your son, Even. I have a feeling he is going to be smarter than his father, and a bigger pain in the ass than your daughter. You're not even married, and you have two children that are driving me crazy. It's not fair. I have six kids and they don't cause me as much trouble as yours are. In nine months and one day you will have three kids. I will wager that one will be smarter than the three of you. I am going to hate all of you combined." 

"I'll give you a raise." 

"Really, how much?" 

"Cost-of-living." 

"The cost-of-living doesn't keep up with the cost-of-living." 

"How much do I pay you a year Rod?" 

"I don't want to say that in front of her." 

"Either you do or I will." 

"$3.5 million year." 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 06



Delicious yelled, "You pay that shyster 3 ½ million dollars a year?" 

"How many days a year do you work for me Rod?" 

"mMknuuop." 

"How much did he say dad, I couldn't make it out." 

"Rod would you like a 50 percent pay cut? If you don't tell Delicious how many days you work for me per year." 

"Less than 100." 

"How many less than 100?" 

"30 less than hundred." 

"Dad are you out of your fucking mind. You are paying this asshole 3 ½ million dollars a year for 70 workdays. You need to have your head examined." 

"Do I have to tell you to get your pocketbook?" 

"I wasn't even thinking about it. How much do I owe the pretzel jar?" 

"You were very good. You only owe it $20." 

"Delicious do you remember what I told Doctor Thyme about not judging the package, but the product that comes out of it." 

"Yes I do." 

"Rod you only work for me 70 days a year. How much time do you spend at home studying for those 70 days?" 

"Close to 200, may be 220 days." 

Delicious gasped. 

"Since you've become my attorney, how many lawsuits have you had to defend me against?" 

"Nineteen." 

"How many happily lost?" 

"None." 

"Delicious do you have any further questions about this asshole." 

"No dad, I withdraw my objection. Rod I apologize, I really do." 

"Your apology is accepted. How long before you leave this planet? I'll help you in any way I can, as a matter of fact the sooner the better." 

"Rod she just apologized be nice." 

"I hate that we can't argue anymore. It takes all the fun out of life." 

"One word from me and I'll take all the sex act of your life. This 20 percent Rod, backdated to the first of the year." 

Delicious screamed, "$700,000, I want a raise just like his." 

"Okay, I was going to raise you to $100 dollars an hour, but since you only want a 20 percent raise, I will raise you to $72 instead." 

"You will not wake up tomorrow morning if you do that." 

"I was only following your instructions." 

"From this point on I always want the higher number." 

"Let me get this straight, if I want to raise your salary by 50 percent you will take it. If I want to spank you and I know you deserve 20 and I normally just give you 10 I have to go with the higher number. Is that right?" 

"I am going to be like Gordon. I am going to be good. There will be no more spankings." 

I reached into my pants pocket, took out a $100 bill, and put it under the pretzel jar. She knew exactly what it was for. 

She pulled it out from underneath the jar and threw it at me. "Bastard." 

"That will be $10 please." 

"I hate you." 

********* 

Rod said, "On that note, we have some serious business to take care of. I think the living room is more comfortable, but if you want to do it here, that's fine with me." 

"Delicious, it's your choice baby." 

"Since I slept with Gray in the living room, I'd like to do it there." 

"You let her sleep with Gray?" 

"I knew that would get him dad." 

"Yes, but that was mean." 

"It was the truth." 

"Would someone like to explain that to me?" 

My daughter and I simultaneously said, "NO!" 

"I hate you both, EQUALLY." 

Rod opened a large manila envelope first. In it was a spreadsheet showing the DNA of one person whose name was covered. I understood it immediately, but I explained it to Delicious so she would understand it. She had never seen one of these before and even though she was brilliant it was best that she knew exactly what she was looking at. 

Rod opened the second manila envelope and pulled out another spreadsheet. It had another DNA profile of the person whose name was covered. They looked nearly identical except for one thing that I've picked out immediately. One was male and the other was female. I brought this to Rod's attention immediately. 

He uncovered both names. 

Even Zachariah Luck. Divine Elizabeth Luck. 

He opened the third envelope and laid it before us. I knew; I knew it in an instant Delicious Margarette (Mark) Luck was my daughter. I did not have to read or see the labs printout, but I let Rod read it so Delicious would hear it. 

"With a 99.99 Degree of Accuracy Access Incorporate, LLP. Laboratories declares: Divine Elizabeth Luck and Even Zachariah Luck to be the parents of Delicious Marguerite Luck, born on the 20th day of July, 1997." 

I did not get the reaction I expected from Delicious. 

"ZACHARIAH! Where the hell did that come from?" 

I followed along. "At least they didn't name me after a drink with an umbrella in it, Margarita." 

"It's not Margarita, it's Marguerite." 

"It's still one heck of a name to tag a child with. At least they can call me Zach. What are they going to call you Reete?" 

"No, they could call me Maggie." 

"Good choice, you do have strong resemblance to Margaret Thatcher." 

"Before you to start a war could we continue please?" 

"He started it." 

"I can't wait to get both of you into outer space." 

"Rod, you do realize when I leave you are going to have to find another source of income." 

"No my friend I won't have to. I will write a book about the great Even Zachariah Luck and his trip into space. I will detail every nut and bolt that went into this venture. It will be a six book set which will take me 20 years to write. The money will flow in forever, and I will receive all the money from your patents." 

"I hate to burst your bubble when you have everything lined up so perfectly. One of the last things I'm going to do before I depart this earth is to make sure all the money from my patents goes to feeding all the starving children on this planet. I will work it through the Bill and Melinda Gates foundation, because they are the most honest people I know." 

"Let's continue before I eat the diary just to get even with Even. Remember, I have already read this. Much of it is inconsequential, and the ramblings of a woman tormented by a man she hated from the day she was told she was going to marry, until she died. She never wanted to marry him. Your parents forced her into it, and regardless of how hard she pushed against it, they wouldn't let her have her way. You can skip many years in between because all it has a stories about Delicious growing up. Nothing really consequential happened during those years. Divine was depressed and unhappy at home. Her salvation was Evens phone calls, Delicious' being a wonderful daughter, and her friends at work. 

I'm going to leave the two of you alone, and I'm going to go home. You don't need me to tell you what Divine thought, meant or said in the words she wrote down on paper. If one of you would let me out please." 

******** 

I sat down alongside my daughter, because there was no longer a doubt she was my daughter. I asked her if she was ready for the big reveal. 

"It frightens me; I'll be honest with you dad. Why would she lie to me all those years? I know she loved me. She proved it every day, but why would she lie to me about everything." 

"It's not a very big book, let's hope the words she put in it helps us understand what she went through, and why she wouldn't let me help her and you." 

My Dearest Even, I am hiding this book in the one place I hope he will never look; amongst his trophies. He is a bad and malicious man and I could not get mom and dad to realize that before they forced me to marry him. They thought I was exaggerating, but I was not. 

The baby I carried was not his, it is ours, yes ours. You were so sick you probably thought it was a dream, but it wasn't, it was real. Mom and dad were in Bar Harbor celebrating their anniversary. You were out with that lapdog friend of yours Rodney. God knows what you see in him, all he does is abuse you. You should kick him in the ass and get rid of him. 

I have no idea where you two were, but you got caught in that freak snowstorm that came through, and instead of staying at his house, you had to come home because you didn't want me to be here alone. You were such a fucking idiot. When you opened the front door you were wet from head to toe and shivering to death. I stripped you down to your shorts and sent you up to take a warm bath. You never stopped shivering as I put you to bed. Your temperature was 104. I uncovered you and stripped you bare. I gave you two Tylenol and rubbed you down with cool water. I put an ice pack under each arm and between your legs to try to bring your temperature down. 

Your fever was so high you became delirious. I was so frightened for you. Then you started talking about me, and I wasn't shocked by what I heard. The things you said about me were the same feelings I had for you. You said how much you loved me and how you wanted me to be with you forever. You wanted no other woman in your life but me. You didn't care if we couldn't have children; you only wanted me, because I was perfect in every way for you. Your thoughts were my thoughts in every way, and I thought them every day. 

I worked on you feverishly for hours trying to get the damn temperature to break but it wouldn't. The snow outside kept getting higher and higher. The radio said it had turned into a nor'easter and we could expect 12 to 16 inches of snow by the next evening. There was no way an ambulance could get to our house, and you and I were stuck together. Together was fine, but I had to get you well. 

To make a bad situation worse the electricity went out. I went downstairs to get the lanterns and the flashlights. I brought them up to your room and sat by your side. This is the time you thank goodness for gas appliances. If and when you woke up I could make you hot soup. I remember you telling me all the time, with that magical brain of yours: If you want to get cool, drink something hot; if you want to get hot you have something cold. I could not understand it until you showed me what you meant. I knew one day you would be Doctor Even Luck. I knew you would not let dad hold you back. What would you do stuck in a paper factory like he is? You would go crazy after one day of that boredom. 

I got tired but I would not leave you alone just in case you woke up. I put on my nightdress, brought in my pillow and blanket, and lay down on the floor. After a few moments I knew this was not going to work. The floor was too cold, and definitely too hard. I decided to lie down on my side by you. 

It was a tight fit for the two of us on your single bed, but I made do. I placed my hand on your stomach, closed my eyes, and fell asleep. I don't know how many minutes or hours passed, but I felt your hand on mine. I thought you had woken up, but I was wrong. I looked into your eyes and you are still asleep. I felt your head, and you were slightly cooler than before. Then I looked down at our hands and I think my eyes nearly popped out of my head. 

Your hand was covering my hand which was holding your erect penis. I had seen a male organ before, but that was in biology class. Here I was in my brother's bed holding the real thing. According to my biology book this was a circumcised penis because it did not have the flap of skin covering the top. I started moving it around as if it was a specimen; checking its length, width, and height. The natural question popped into my mind: How the hell does something this big fit into an opening that small. Since geography class tells us about the overpopulation of the planet, I guess it fits quite well. I pulled my hand off your penis saying to myself what the hell am I doing, you are my brother, I'm not supposed to do that to you. I looked up at your face, and realized you are the only person in the world I wanted to do it with. 

I went to your chest of drawers to see if you're hiding any condoms. I check everywhere, even underneath the draws and you're not hiding them anywhere. I realize you were probably as innocent as I am. I would love to lose my virginity to you Even, but I can't get pregnant. Our folks would kill us. Actually, they would kill you and force me to have the baby. It would ruin both of our lives. Maybe I'll just stick to head in to see what it feels like. I won't break my hymen. I leave my cherry intact for my husband; that will make him happy. 

Even stop that. I can't believe it; you are unconscious, and you are playing with that thing. Your penis is as hard stone. I take off my nightdress and underwear and remove your arm away from this plaything. Your body is so warm. The way you wraps your arms around me I'm sure you are awake, but you are not; or at least I think so. I decided to test you. I take your nipple into my mouth and bite it. You didn't even moan in pain. You are asleep. 

I am about to take advantage of my brother, the love of my life, and I cannot tell him how I feel about him. This is so wrong, yes it is wrong, but I'm going to do it anyhow, damn the consequences. I want my brother. I love my brother. 

I slide my body down, until my rear end is resting on your thighs. I check the length to see how much I have to move up, and surprisingly it's not much at all. I spread my lips to see if I am moist enough to have it enter me a little, without causing me too much pain. I cannot believe that I am wetter than the Kennebunk River. I was paying so much attention to your sex; I hadn't been paying any attention to mine. 

There you were back to playing with yourself again. I could only imagine what you were dreaming about. I hoped it is about me. 

I center my body, and prepare to put an inch or so of my magnificent brother's instrument inside me. I placed my hand around him to make sure it would go in me no further than that. There are going to be no accidents tonight. I was going to remain a virgin. 

I rubbed the head of your penis between the lips of my vagina to moisten it. I felt for the opening, and slowly, oh so very slowly I allowed you into my body. I never let go of your penis. The tip never touched my maidenhead. I moved slowly up and down and side to side. The sensation was mind blowing. I knew sex was going to be fun when I had a chance to do it legally. I let go with my hand and stayed still just to feel you alone in my body. It was you and I alone in bed as lovers. All was right with the world. 

I moved my hand back to take it out of me when you screamed. I had no idea what happened, until one second later. I felt your semen filling my vagina. I screamed, "Even No!" 

I jumped out of bed, ran into the bathroom, and attempted to wash everything that got into me, out. I must have stayed in the bathtub for 20 minutes flushing water in and out of my vagina. I was positive I got it all. 

Nine days later I missed my period. I wanted to die. 

We were going to Cape Cod the following weekend for the fall festival and I decided to do the deed there. I hoped to find a nice young man, do it quickly, get it over with, and never see him again. I would tell my folks and I lost my head and it happened. I wanted to get an abortion, which they would not hear of, because we are Catholic. I would be able to have our baby, without them ever knowing. It would be perfect. 

Everything went as planned at Cape Cod, the kid was rough, but it did not matter. Three weeks later I told my parents I was pregnant. I thought the boy would be in Massachusetts or Connecticut or New Hampshire or any place but in Maine. However, my father demanded to know the boy's name. So I told him, Julius Mark. 

"Julius Mark; Sam and Julia Mark's son, Julius?" 

"Dad, I did not get a social history of the boy. We made out and I lost my head. We made love and parted company. It's more my fault than his." 

"His father works for me, and his son is going to stand up for you. I'll make sure of that young woman. You are getting married, whether you want to or not." 

"Dad I don't want to get married. I will raise my child by myself. I don't want to force the boy to marry me because of a mistake I made. It will not work. He will hate me and the baby." 

"He better not, or I will fire his father's ass." 

This is how the conversation in our household went for days, until the following Saturday, when Mister and Mrs. Mark brought Julius to the house. 

Julius looked at me as if I was already dead. I walked over to him and said that I did not want to get married, but my father was forcing the issue. He didn't believe me, not then, not ever. 

Both of our parents made arrangements with the priest. We were married at the foot of the altar on a Monday morning, with just our parents as witnesses. If they could have thrown a blanket over our heads, I think they would have. I don't know why they forced us to marry if they were so ashamed of me or us. 

Dad finished the basement of our house and made us an apartment, with a private entrance and everything. It was very cute. We could go into the main house by the stairwell and we often did to share dinner with the family because Julius and I were still in school. 

I became the laughingstock of the sophomore class walking around with a belly like a bowling ball. Julius was getting a mixed reaction. Some of his friends were getting him high-fives for getting me pregnant and others were calling him an old married man. 

This did not stop him from screwing around with other girls. Some of my friends, who did not desert me, told me about it. I never brought it up to him, because I knew it would happen. 

That did not hurt me as much as you deserting me Even. I never stopped loving you. I was carrying our baby, but I couldn't tell you. Your reaction cut my heart out. You stopped talking to me when I needed you the most. The hatred in your eyes spoke volumes, but not a word came out of your mouth. A simple 'Hello' would have brightened my day, but if I walked into a room you would leave it. You left for MIT without saying a word. I delivered our baby and you weren't there. You had a month off from school at Christmas, and you left on January 2. You watched our baby play, and you barely laughed. You could have killed me, and I would have felt better. 

During the nine months of my pregnancy Julius and I got along, but barely. It was probably because we were downstairs from our parents. Once I started showing he barely touched me, and I didn't mind at all. I knew he was getting all the sex he wanted from the girls at school. I didn't know he had a reputation when I met him, but he did, and as long as he left me alone I was fine. 

Then the worst thing in the world happened, he graduated in June and dad got him a job at the factory. He came home that night, I had dinner ready and said hello as he walked through the door. He walked over to me and backhanded me across the face. I fell to the floor crying. I asked him what I had done wrong. He said I am going to die in that fucking job. That day ended our marriage. Every time he walked in the door I made sure there was something between me and him. I was never going to be hit again. There was always a knife underneath my side of the mattress, where I could get to it quickly. I had little things that looked innocuous that could turn into weapons quickly. Cans of hairspray, spray paint, cooking spray, anything that could blind him for seconds so I could get away from him. I was not going to be an abused wife. 

Then, roly-poly came into our lives. A cute bundle of chubby arms and chunky thighs that you wanted to bite and tickle. Our baby Even, yes ours, the Gerber Baby in the flesh. Was she ever a joy? She drank my breasts dry every night. I thought she was going to be 50 pounds by the time she was one, but all she did was drink and poop. She was very good at both of them. 

She was a little more than a year old, and I was putting away groceries. I asked Julius to change her diaper, which he really hated to do. He brought her into the bedroom and I couldn't understand what was taking him so long. I went in there to find out. I screamed at him because he was playing with her privates. I told him if he ever touched her again I would kill him. He knew I wasn't joking. For the first time in our marriage he ran out of the room looking frightened. So what did my little darling do when I picked her up, and held her close; she peed on me. No good deed goes unpunished. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 06



One day the telephone rang and it was you, my darling brother, the love of my life was calling me and apologizing with every other word out of his mouth for abandoning me, and acting like an idiot. I cradled the phone against my ear, listening to your every word as I lay down on my bed crying. You had patented your first product, something about earphones. I couldn't have cared less. I was just listening to your voice. It was music, no it was a symphony. You begged me to talk to you, but I couldn't because I was crying so hard. I was finally able to say, "Even I love you so much." 

You said to me, "I have loved you since I was 13 years old. I am so sorry I hurt you." 

Then you said something that frightened me, because I thought you knew my secret. "How is our little girl?" I stopped breathing. Then you repeated your question as if I didn't hear you. "How is Delicious?" I breathe a sigh of relief. 

"Roly-poly has thinned out. She is now long and lean but Julius is no longer allowed to touch her. I caught him playing between her thighs and I went ballistic. I threatened him with his life, and he knew I wasn't kidding. He doesn't go near her now, not even when she's playing." 

"Did you call the police?" 

"It would be my word against his. There is no physical evidence; they would be able to do with thing." 

I remember the conversation as if it was yesterday, because it was our first since you stop talking to me. You promised to call me every few weeks checkup on me, and you did. My spirits soared, and he noticed. 

"What's happened to you, you look happy?" 

"I'm happy because the pervert, who is my husband, is staying away from my daughter. He had better continue to stay away from her." 

That ended that conversation in a hurry, and he never brought it up again. 

We moved into a house of our own. It wasn't much but it was ours. Delicious had her own room, and I spent hours in their tutoring her because she was very smart. 

It didn't take me long to realize she was as smart as her father. I started bringing books home from the library that were high school level. She breezed through them. Science, math, physics, it didn't matter, if I didn't understand them she would explain it to me. Then it got ridiculous. By the time she was nine years old the library had to order books for her on advanced subjects that I had no clue what they were talking about. Books on Particle Physics, Nuclear Research, String Theory, what the hell were these things? I sure as hell didn't know. I wanted to send her to you, so you could continue her education. You kept calling me and telling me how wealthy you were and to leave Julius and come to live with you in Colorado. It was a very tempting offer but my life here has not gotten to the breaking point yet. Julius and I had an understanding; he could do what he wanted outside the house, as long as he behaved inside the house. It was working out. He was screwing everything in a skirt. Delicious and I were being left alone. 

Two things happened in the same month; Delicious had her 10th birthday, and Doctor Even Luck was nominated for a Nobel Prize in Science. I already knew you were very wealthy, but I never told anyone else. Julius said he hoped you won so you would give us part of the $1 million prize money. Dad called you a loser. There is no sense arguing with him, so I stayed silent. You know he hated you because you didn't go to work at the paper mill making $18.50 an hour. He wanted you under his thumb for the rest of your life. Thank God you escaped. 

I don't know how he did it, but Julius found the books Delicious was studying from. We were sitting at the kitchen table and he threw them down in front of us. "What are these?" 

Delicious said, "I'm studying for Advanced Placement in science and math. Those are my books." 

He seemed to accept her answer until a few weeks later when he cornered me in the kitchen. 

"I know what you are trying to do. If you send that little bitch to your brother, I'm not going to kill you; I'm going to kill your parents. Then I'm going to Colorado and killing her and your brother. I'll have a few of my friends come here and have a party with you. When they're finished, there will not be enough of you to put in a doggy bag." 

I protested. "I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm hoping she is able to get into MIT just like Even did. What good would it do to send her to him? She has all the books here she needs, and she has to finish college." 

"Remember what I just told you, because I'm not kidding. She leaves this house your parents are gone, your daughter is gone, your brother is gone, and you are plaything for my friends until your dead." 

I shrugged my shoulders and said, "Then I have nothing to worry about." I walked by him as if I did not have a care in the world. I don't know if it confused him or not, but he never brought up the subject again. 

The problem for me was that was exactly what I was going to do. If I could get Delicious out of harm's way, and deal with him one on one, I stood a better chance of winning. Now I had no chance at all because our parent's lives were at stake. 

Delicious started to bloom when she was 12 years old, and the pervert noticed. It wasn't only him that noticed, but every boy at school. It seemed every other girl stayed flat while delicious had a chest of 34B. She was honey, and the boys were flies. She couldn't keep them away from her. They would grab her while she was in the school hallway, at gym class, and even in the classroom. The teachers ignored her pleas for help. I started reading about ways to help children defend themselves from this type of aggression, but all of them required interference by school authorities. I found three books that I thought were absolutely brilliant in their concept and started putting them into practice at home with her. It was quite an attitude adjustment, because this was not my baby. She was sweet to the core, and I had to change her into the wicked witch of the west. 

We practiced hard over the summer months between eighth grade, and first year of high school. She went from her demure walk to walking like a truck driver. Her dresses went from knee length to a few inches below her crotch. They were so short I had to sew panties into them to keep her covered. The biggest adjustment was her attitude. She was a great student. She should go to Broadway to act because when she started she was magnificent. I would walk up to her as if I was a boy attempting to get the best of her in front of his friends, and embarrassing her. 

"Hey cunt you want a piece in my meat. You think you can take it all down your throat, and swallow my cum?" 

Delicious would reply with something like: "What that pimple, I couldn't even brush my teeth with it." 

As she got older she came up with something I didn't even think of. If a boy came on really strong, she came on stronger. She would move into his private space and say, "Let's do it. Let's do it bareback. A guy gave me the gift that keeps on giving. I may as well give it to you. If I have herpes why shouldn't you." 

Once the word got around that she had herpes the boys gave her a wide birth. It was the smartest move she ever made, and it never occurred to me. There was only one person we could not pull that stunt on and he lived in this house. Every night at dinner he would look at her as if she was on the plate. I began wearing slacks all the time with a folding knife in each pocket. When he went out drinking with his friends after dinner, Delicious and I would study until the wee hours of the morning. We made sure she did not do well in school to go along with her persona, but I knew she was bright. 

Every night when he got home he would open her bedroom door only to find us studying. He would slam the door shut and go to our bedroom to sleep. Delicious had a knife under her mattress for protection also. I wasn't sure she had the courage to use it on him. 

You, my brother, gave me the courage to go on. Your phone calls, your constant pleas for me, and our baby to come to live with you were always in my mind. I couldn't do it because of the threat to our parents. The police would have been helpless again, because no crime had been committed. They were only words uttered, supposedly in anger. I knew better, but they are restricted by the law. There were hundreds of times when he came home so drunk I could have killed him, and said he assaulted me, but I am not a killer. I could not have lived with myself if I did it. I would have been worse than him. My life was bad, no it was terrible, but at least he didn't touch me or our baby. I went to work every day and had friends to talk to. During those hours my life was normal. Delicious made sure she did not enter the house unless my car was in the driveway. She was never allowed to be alone with him. 

You called me last night and you patented another one of your thingamajig's. I wish I could understand what you were talking about, but you were higher than a kite about it. I was up there with you. It is such fun to talk to you when you are like that. It is like when we were kids, and you would tickle me. I would scream and you would never let me go until I begged for mercy. You were such a bastard that way. My one and only weakness and you took me anytime you wanted with it. Well, actually I had to weaknesses, tickling, and you Even, my brother. I would do anything for you. One day I hope to see you reach out for the stars, and the world will proclaim you a hero among men. I have known that since we were children. When you get to your destination do not be surprised if I am there waiting for you, because my heart is always with yours. I love you so much Even. 

Dad called. He told me Julius was hurt playing football with his friends. What a shame. He's on his way here to get me and to take me to the hospital. I'd rather go to the dentist. Delicious is at a girlfriends' house. I will put our little sign in the window so she knows not to come in the house. I have to put this book away with his trophies, just in case he has a broken leg and comes home. I wish he broke his neck. My life would be so much easier. I could be in heaven with my two loves, my daughter, and my brother. I will continue writing when it is safe. 

********** 

I closed the diary and placed it in Delicious' hands. She held it to her chest and cried. 

I lamented, "Why did not she tell me? I could have bribed him with a few million dollars and he would have let you both go. That is all he ever wanted: money! I could have given him $1 million a year for the rest of his life as long as he never entered the United States again. He would have jumped at the chance." 

"She lived her whole life for me. Everything she did was to protect me from him. If your parents and listened to her at the very beginning, none of this would have happened." 

"My father was a very hard man. I was his son, his firstborn. I was to follow in his footsteps and take over at the mill. I was nine years old when I told him I was going to be a scientist. He smacked me and told me I was going to work in the mill and learn his job so I could take over for him. I told him no. I was nine years old and I told my father no, I am going to be a scientist. He hated me from that day on. 

When your mother became pregnant with you, and Julius accidentally lived in the same town, she did not stand a chance. If the boy lived in a 100-mile radius my father would have gotten him to marry her. He would move heaven and earth to get his way, regardless if he was right or wrong. He was good at his job, but he was terrible as a human being. He had very few friends, and I never heard my mother talk back to him. I never saw her smile." 

When I graduated MIT they did not come. Thousands upon thousands of people were there to congratulate 28 students who became Doctors of one discipline or another and I had no one there to congratulate me. I believe that is what turned me inward and more determined than ever to succeed. I did, beyond my wildest dreams. 

Now, I am 33 years old and I have the opportunity to help a daughter whose life I missed 17 years of. I will start from the ground up with you. It will be as if you are brand-new; a baby in my arms. You know what that means do not you?" 

"No dad, what does it mean?" 

"No sex for 16 years." 

"Dad, you do not have a prayer." 

"How much would you like to bet?" 

"Why do I have this feeling I am a fish with a hook in my mouth?" 

"If we leave this earth in 10 years, and I put you in stasis, it will be a lot more than 16 years." 

"You should not have said anything dad. It means I have to hurry up and get all the sex I can in the next 10 years." 

"You are only going to have one tiny problem." 

"What do you have in store for me now?" 

"I am going to have you handcuffed to Gordon." 

"Dad you are impossible." 

"Please do not tell me you have just figured that out." 

"I would like to get mom's book put into a sealed glass enclosure so it does not decay." 

"I will have Rod do it for us." 

"That will be fine. Where do we go from here dad?" 

"Can I say I am sorry that I missed all those years of you growing up?" 

"You can, but it was not your fault. It was not mom's fault. It was not even Julius's fault. It was your father's fault. If he had kept his nose out of everybody's business none of this would have happened. It was a chain of coincidences. Why couldn't Julius have lived in Maryland or Tennessee or any place but in Maine? Why couldn't your father have kept his mouth closed? After you graduated, mom would have moved in with you in a heartbeat. The three of us would have lived together happily ever after." 

"Tomorrow I am getting married to a woman I truly love. How does this fit into the scheme of things?" 

"It all goes back to your father. He forced mom to marry Julius. He was driving the car, when he tried to beat the train at the crossing. He set everything in motion, and that is why everything is where it is today. Do not look backwards dad; look forward to a great life with Jennifer. Mom would want it that way." 

"I hope so, I have really do." 

"She said so dad, she said, "One day I hope to see you reach out for the stars, when you get there do not be surprised if you find me there waiting for you, because my heart is always with you." If she is not telling you to go on I do not know who is dad." 

"You are right. We will start Monday morning brainstorming ideas on the design of the craft. You are going to have to contact C.E.R.N. They are the only ones that can produce enough antimatter in a seven-year time period to fuel your engine." 

"Dad, I am not going to use antimatter." 

"Oh fuck, don't tell me, I do not want to know." 

"Chicken shit." 

"$10 please." 

"That goes for you too." 

"God I hate myself." 

********** 

27. A NEW START 

"Gordon have you blown my machine up yet?" 

"No dad, but Doctor Thyme seems confused." 

"What is the matter Gray?" 

"Doctor Luck, he is only four years old. He could not have been exposed to the formulas he is using to figure out these problems. At times he is skipping three and four steps and coming out with the proper answers. I cannot do it, how is he?" 

"Have you asked him?" 

"Honestly, I have been too embarrassed to ask him." 

"Gordon, you have heard Doctor Thyme's question, can you answer it for him?" 

"The numbers just run around in my head, and tell me where to put them. When they want me to skip something they put flowers in the way and I have to jump over them. I just follow what the numbers tell me to do." 

"Do you see Gray, it's easy. You just follow the numbers and jump over the flowers." 

"Can I tell that to Doctor Oyster when he gets here tomorrow?" 

Delicious asked, "Clam is coming here tomorrow?" 

"Clam?" 

"Yes that is what Director Meil calls him. Dad we forgot to send him the figures on the Milli-Newton Thrusters. One will get you 10 that is why he is coming to your wedding." 

"Should we really blow his mind and have Gordon look at the numbers?" 

"Yes, let Gordon see Caltech's numbers." 

"Gordon, a scientist at a very prestigious university on the West Coast called is building a miniature thruster to be used in space. We do not think it will work. He thinks it will. Would you look at the information for us and give us your opinion on it?" 

"Sure dad." 

I brought up the program at his station and backed away. I asked him if he would like something to drink, because it was a long program and would take him about an hour to go through. 

"Can I have some orange juice?" 

"Sure, I will be right back." 

Gray had never seen the program so he went through at his station and I went through it at mine. Delicious stood behind Gordon holding his orange juice. Every time he found a problem in the program he highlighted it and continued. It took him 90 minutes to go through the entire program and he found seven problems. Delicious had found five. She was not happy so she asked him about the two she missed. It cost her $20 because they were simple errors. 

"Gordon, I am sorry I used bad words. You are fantastic." 

My son said in his ever-humble manner, "I know." 

As delicious walked by me she said, "Some girl is going to kill that kid." 

I laughed. 

We downloaded the corrected programs onto discs and sealed them in anti-magnetic envelopes and put them into a carry folder. Our workday was over, fun time was here. Or at least I thought so. 

I was told I could not see Jennifer until at least 3 o'clock this afternoon. I took Gordon by the hand and said, "Come on son, let us go outside and play." 

Delicious mocked me. "The great and powerful Doctor Even Zachariah Luck knows how to play?" This 

"If you look at the list of my patents, two of them are for very successful and profitable toys." 

"No shit." 

"Gordon would you tell her please." 

"$10 in the pretzel jar please." 

Delicious knelt down beside him and said, "Listen little brother, I am going to take that money out of your allowance if you are not careful." 

"I did not know I was getting an allowance. How much is it and where can I invest it." 

Doctor Grayson Thyme walked to the side of the stairwell and held onto the railing for balance. 

He said, "Gordon, if I give you all the money that is in my 401(k) would you invested wisely for me?" 

"I can tell you what to do with it, but I cannot do it for you, because I am not registered as a broker." 

Gray dropped his head to his chest, until his mind cleared. 

Delicious took his arm and asked, "Gray are you all right?" 

"I have a question to ask, and I am very serious about it. I want to watch this little boy grow up, because I want to learn from him. The only way for me to do that is to leave NASA, and join your intrepid little group, to help you design your Starship. Would you be willing to take me on as a charter member of your building crew? I would love to go 'WHERE NO MAN or WOMAN HAS GONE BEFORE!' 

That is the problem with working at NASA. You work for a generation on a craft that you can call every nut and bolt your own. Then three or four strangers get inside it, and they are the heroes. 

The actual heroes are the dreamers, designers, metallurgists, everyone down to the maintenance men, who make sure that no scrap of wire or waste is in that machine before it blasts off. 

Apollo 13 was almost a disaster because of a bit of unshielded wire, and it was only going to the moon. Orion is going to Mars. If it happens out there, those men are dead, and the fault falls on us. 

I smiled at Delicious. "You are going to have to design a larger containment unit." 

She got me again. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 07



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.'

CHAPTER 7

***If you read the disclaimer above, you will notice something is missing. I had predicted this would be a SHORT STORY: 5 CHAPTERS LONG. When I passed that mark I informed you I lied, and said it would be over by CHAPTER 8. It appears I have lied again. I have lost control of this story. I am just going to let it run its course. I am going to let it go where it wants to go, for however long it wants to go there, without changing the title, or worrying about its length. This is Chapter 7. Chapter 8 is nearly finished and I have to hold both chapters back, because I posted Chapter 6 three days ago. My mind is running amok with how these people are acting and reacting to one another. The words are just flowing onto the computer, like water over Niagara Falls. I pray it does not reach 29 Chapters, as my last effort did, but I have nothing better to do with my time than to write. If it is not for this story, it will be for another one, which has not come to me in my 'dream state' as of yet. So without wasting any more of your time, here is the CHAPTER 7. I hope you enjoy it.

28. Even, Jennifer and GORDON.

I parked the car at the side entrance to the hotel. Gordon and I walked in looking for my ill-tempered fiancée. We saw her pacing back and forth near the front entrance waiting for us to arrive. As she walked closer to the front we took a seat halfway there.

I said to my son, "Let's sit here, and see how long it takes mommy to see us; when she does be prepared to run."

Jennifer walked by us three times. On the fourth time she stopped directly in front of us. She turned slowly, with fire in her eyes, but she did not speak to me, she spoke to her son.

"How long have you been sitting there Gordon?"

Gordon did not lie, but he did not tell the whole truth either. "A long time mommy, I did not see a clock."

"Honey, unless you want to get blood all over your new clothes, which make you look very handsome, move away from your father."

"Thank you mommy; dad bought theses clothes for me a little while ago. I hated the clothes I was wearing. They are always plaid, and I hate plaid."

He was distracting her, which was very good for me.

"Why didn't you say something to me if you didn't like plaid?"

"I didn't want to hurt your feelings. You seem to like plaid."

"All little children wear plaid, Gordon."

"Most little children look like dorks, because their parents dress them that way. I want to look like dad."

Jennifer looked at me and noticed the difference in my clothing.

"What the heck happened to you today? You are dressed differently. I'm still going to kill you, but you look very handsome."

"If you are going to kill me, I will take the Fifth Amendment on my apparel. I don't have to answer your question on the grounds you are going to hurt me."

"Trust me; I am going to hurt you Even. You will never do this to me again."

"It was not our fault. Speak with your grandmother. If she gave us an exact time, instead of giving me a generalized time, we would have been here waiting for you. Isn't that correct Gordon?"

"That's right dad, we would not have stopped at Wendy's if we knew mom was waiting for us."

"You two have eaten already? I am starving, and you two have eaten?"

"Son, should we take mom for Buffalo Wings?"

Gordon laughed. "I bet mommy doesn't know that Buffaloes fly."

"Very funny Gordon, you are getting very close to a spanking."

I stood up from the comfortable lounge chair, and approached my fiancée carefully. I trapped her arms by her side, and kissed her gently.

"You are a bastard Even Luck."

"I can't be I know both my parents."

"Wise-ass, I'm going to spank you tomorrow night."

"You owe the pretzel jar $10, doesn't she"?

"Yes she does Dad. I think you're going to need a larger jar. I don't think anyone's going to win."

"I already know who's going to win."

"Everyone keeps saying bad words, who could possibly win?"

"Think about it; who is the one person in our house who has not said one bad word."

Gordon tapped his foot for a second, and then his eyes lit up.

"It's me; I haven't said a bad word."

"That's right, and if you don't say a bad word before Wednesday night, you win all the money."

"Mommy, I'm going to be rich. There's a ton of money in that jar, plus two $100 bills underneath it."

"What are you going to do with all that money, dear?"

"I'm going to invest it in penny stocks."

I looked at my son and smiled. "Gordon most children your age would say they are going to buy candy, baseball cards, or a computer game. You are going to buy stocks. You are an amazing young man."

"I know."

"Delicious said that one day a girl is going to kill him because of the way he answers her questions. I'm beginning to agree with her."

"You have only known him for a few weeks. He has been answering questions that way for more than three years. You will get used to it, I have."

"It's a beautiful day outside, why don't we take him to the amusement park. I'll take you into the tunnel of love, and see if your breasts are really in front."

"Liar, you are not going to touch me until tomorrow, and you know it. You get my hopes up, and then you dash them to the ground. You are evil Even Luck. After tomorrow, when you promise me something you had better deliver."

"Rod said this morning that nine months and one day after we get married I am going to be the father of three children. Apparently, I am going to deliver tomorrow night."

"Speaking of your attorney, did you find out everything you needed to know this morning?"

"Yes I did. Let's get you something to eat. I will tell both of you how and why it happened."

"Buffalo wings or do I get real food. You haven't wined or dined me, yet."

"It's a little early for a candlelight dinner, but if you're willing, so am I."

"I am told there is a very nice restaurant on top of this building."

"I seem to remember that also. Let's get the little one and go upstairs."

I looked towards Gordon to tell him to join us, and I said, "Oh hell, here come Delicious and Gray. Let's get in the elevator in a hurry. I don't want company; I don't think they do either."

As we rushed into the elevator Jennifer asked, "Is daddy growing up?"

"He's trying his best. I talked with her this morning. I told her I trusted her judgment, and to let her conscience be her guide. She told me she loved me, and I said I loved her too. Then we sat down and watched Gordon make a big mess of his waffles. Didn't you Gordon?"

"The waffle was big, and my mouth is small. The syrup gets all over me before I can get it all in."

"That's why we have soap and water. It not only cleans up little boys and girls, but big boys and girls too."

*******

At the entrance to the restaurant I told the host I wanted her to seat us as far away from the other guests as possible. I wanted the area darkened. A bottle of their best champagne, champagne flutes, crystal glasses, crisp linens, and candles at our table. I handed her $500 and asked her to tell the staff to give my fiancée the royal treatment.

Servers, who were dressed in their casual afternoon attire, changed into their formal eveningwear to serve us. The table linens were changed, and everything I asked for was placed at our table.

We were directed to our seats. Gordon jumped into his booster, and the server placed a linen napkin on his lap. I sat next to him, and Jennifer sat across from both of us.

"I am not used to such luxury. Gordon normally dominates my meal to the point I cannot enjoy it."

I looked at my little man and smiled. "Son did we didn't have any problem at Wendy's, did we? I ate my meal, and you ate yours. I thought we did splendidly together?"

"Yes we did dad. Mommy always fusses over me. She will not leave me alone. If I bite my hamburger, she has to wipe my face clean every time I get mustard on it. If she would wait until I finish, she could wipe it all at once. When I get to my French fries, she is worse. After each one, she wipes the Ketchup off my face. She is afraid someone is going to take a picture of me at any moment and doesn't want me to look messy. I can't say anything, because I don't want to upset her. She is a woman, and she cries easily."

It took everything I had not to laugh; I mean everything. I looked at Jennifer and she was about to cry.

"Do you see what I mean dad. I told the truth and mommy is getting ready to cry. I think you should sit by her until she feels better."

"Who holds mommy when she cries Gordon?"

"I do."

"Shouldn't you do it now so she feels better?"

"Okay."

Instead of climbing over me to get to his mother, he slid out of his seat, under the table, and came up the other side.

"Mommy, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. You can hold on to me until you feel better."

Jennifer did just that. She took him in her arms and nearly crushed him to her chest. "I'm sorry I'm such a pest. I do want you to look handsome all the time. I'll try to do better from now on."

"Don't feel bad if you can't; I will understand."

"Are you sure you're not older than I am Gordon?"

"I can't be you're my mommy."

"I know I was there when you were born."

"So was I."

Feigning anger, Jennifer said, "Go back to your father, before I spank you mister."

"What did I say that was wrong? Were we both there?"

"Yes we were both there, but I was the one who was in pain."

Gordon was about to say something when I stopped him.

"Not another word young man; I know what you are thinking, but if you say it, I will not be able to save you from that spanking. Delicious is rubbing off on you, and that is not a good thing for a boy your age."

"She is my sister, sort of, and she is a lot of fun; except for the bad words."

"Yes she is a lot of fun. Did you see the pictures of her buried under whipped cream?"

"No I didn't. Did she eat it all?"

"There was so much of it that she and all of Rods children couldn't eat it all."

"Wow that was a lot whipped cream."

The server came and handed us our menus. He also brought out a chilled bottle of Cristal buried in ice. I asked him not to open it until dinner was served. Gordon ordered a chocolate milkshake, but Jennifer said 'No.' I told the waiter to make it a large adult size.

"You are going to spoil him."

"I certainly hope so. I've waited all my life for this moment, and I am going to take full advantage of it."

"You don't have to do it in one day Even. We are going to have a long life together."

"I thought you were going to kill me?"

"That decision is on hold, temporarily."

"Is it on hold temporarily, until you see how I perform in bed, or is it on hold until you get pregnant?"

"Pregnant, then I get all your money."

"I haven't changed my Will or my insurance policies yet. Pregnant or not, you don't get a penny. When I change everything I could have Rod be my executor, and take care of all my money, until Gordon and my new child come of age. He would split it evenly between the children and leave you out cold."

"You forget dear I have my own money to fall back on."

"Yes, but it will be comforting for me to know, as I lie in my grave next to my sister, that my children have access to my $1 billion and not my wife."

"You are a billionaire; since when?"

"Rod told me this morning. Apparently I crossed over that threshold last evening, when I found out your breasts were in front."

"Isn't that where women's breasts have always been dad?"

"Yes my son, but I used it as part of a joke I told last night at the dinner party, because Rod was making fun of me."

"Was it funny?"

"Yes, it was funny."

"Good."

"What would you like for dinner Gordon?"

"My milkshake, we just ate at Wendy's."

"Excellent choice, you can have something light to eat later this evening before you go to bed."

"What would madam like to have?"

"I believe I will have the prawns."

"If you are sick tomorrow we are still getting married."

"Why, what would you prefer I have Doctor Luck?"

"A safer dish for this evening would be the rack of lamb, veal chops, or tenderloin of beef. However, eat whatever you wish, we will get married, but you will not have sex tomorrow night, because you may be throwing up, due to tainted seafood."

"Cover your ears Gordon."

"You still have to put $10 in the pretzel jar. We have an honor system."

"We do?"

"Yes mommy, even if no one's around and you say a bad word you have to put the money in the jar. It is a matter of honor."

"Who made up that ridiculous rule?"

"Daddy did. Delicious put money in the jar when dad wasn't there, because of the rule."

"That's very commendable; now cover your ears."

I watched Gordon cover his ears and as he did I said, "I love you Jennifer."

"Fuck off Even, I can't even order what I want for dinner."

"Of course you can, just be advised if you are sick you don't get laid."

"I have been waiting four years to get fucked again, and you are going to withhold services, because I may be sick. What kind of man are you Even Luck?"

"I am the kind of man that doesn't want to get vomited on, especially on his wedding night."

"You are a real asshole Even."

I tapped Gordon on his head and he uncovered his ears.

"Mommy you owe the cookie jar $30 for three bad words."

Jennifer asked me, "Why do we bother having him cover his ears?"

"I didn't hear you mommy, I read your lips."

This time I could not hold it in. I roared with laughter. Was there anything my little boy could not do? I was going to take him to the Board of Education and have them test him out of Elementary, and High school. They would be a waste of his time, and talents. I would have my professors at MIT send him curriculum tests to see how advanced he was. I did not know if they ever had declared a Doctorate of Mathematics on a boy as young as five years old, but I believe they were looking at one now. How could one man get so lucky? If the stars were appropriately aligned, Monday morning I would have a pregnant wife. I already had two children, who could compete with Einstein in the brain department. My sister told me to reach for the stars; I was already well on my way.

Delicious and Gray walked into the restaurant and sat at a booth well to the right of us. They sat together, and I could see them plainly. I tried to ignore them but it was impossible.

Jennifer looked at them, because she saw my eyes drifting that way.

"Keep your eyes on me daddy."

"If you don't ask for the impossible, neither will I. She is my baby. I won't interfere, but don't ask me not to worry."

"Do you want me to say hello to them daddy?"

"That is the last thing I want you to do. They need their privacy, let them have it."

Then Gray kissed her and I nearly bent the silverware in half. It wasn't as bad as when she kissed him back. I said a silent prayer hoping to survive the evening when the server returned.

I said, "Someone has just entered the restaurant I do not wish to see. Do you have a privacy screen?"

"Yes sir I'll bring it right out."

He set it up so we were blocked from the entire restaurant. We were in a cocoon all our own.

Jennifer asked, "Who do you think is happier now, Delicious, or you?"

"I believe it's both of us. I will live through dinner, and she will enjoy her date. She is 17 years old, and I believe that was her real first kiss. I hope she enjoyed it."

"A girl always remembers her first kiss. She will always be able to tell you who, where, when, how, and why."

"I remember mine."

"A man never remembers his. Their brains are not wired that way."

"Do you want to cover your ears Gordon, or is it just a waste of time?"

"If you don't want me to know what mommy says, I have to cover my eyes and my ears."

"Do you have four hands Gordon?"

"No I only have two."

"In that case you are going to hear mommy say a bad word."

"My first kiss was a week ago Thursday, at a large house outside Fairbanks Alaska. Her name was Jennifer Stars. I am marrying her tomorrow. Gordon Stars is going to be my son."

"You are a real prick Even."

"Go ahead Gordon."

"That will cost you $10 mommy. That brings your total to $40."

"I don't need a calculator when I have my son with me."

"You don't need a computer when you have your son with you."

**********

Dinner was served. Jennifer decided on the tenderloin of beef, I had the petite filet and Gordon sipped on his chocolate milkshake. All was right with the world, although I desperately wanted to see what was happening on the other side of that privacy screen.

The waiter poured our champagne and I toasted my beautiful fiancée, and son. I gave Gordon a little sip of my champagne, and he almost lost Wednesday night's winnings because of it.

"Dad that taste like..." He covered his mouth with his hand before he could say it.

"Gordon, this champagne costs $300 per bottle. Many people think the same way you do, and they say it out loud."

"How can something that bad cost so much?"

"Many people believe this is the best champagne in the world, and they are willing to pay that much money for it. This is a special occasion for your mother and me, and I am willing to pay for it. Next time your mother gets a Diet Coke."

"Can I get another milkshake?"

"I think I'll buy a milkshake machine for our home. How does that sound?"

"I don't like the look on mommy's face."

"Don't worry about mommy's face. We are men; we know how to handle our women."

"Bullshit."

"Mommy you are going to fill up the pretzel jar all by yourself. That is $50."

"I think you should come home with me again tonight Gordon. I don't like the look on your mommy's face either."

"Doctor Even Luck there is a brain inside that head of yours; and you are finally using it."

While I had her undivided attention I told her the story about my sister and me; and how Delicious was conceived. I told her the entire story, from the beginning, and why Divine was unwilling to move to Denver. When I finished there were tears in Jennifer's eyes.

I asked her not to cry for any of us, because Delicious and I had come to terms with it. It was not Divine's fault. It was not Julius' fault, and it was not my fault. It was my father's fault for being such an intractable monster all his life. He never let anyone else's opinions or feelings get in his way. He ran everyone's life his way and ruined them in the process. As Divine said in her diary, I was the lucky one, because I escaped.

We finished eating, and I paid the bill leaving a handsome tip for those who served us. The trick now was to leave the restaurant without being spotted by my daughter. Jennifer and I did a wonderful job of not looking in their direction, but the little one with us waved at her. It was the first time I wanted to kill him. He was only four years old, and you don't kill a child for breaking the rules of protocol.

***********

We went to the amusement park, to let Gordon have some fun. We ran into a problem immediately. He was too small to go on some rides alone.

I was too tall to fit on them. This left Jennifer in a conundrum: Was she going to be the good mommy, or the bad mommy?




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 07



With Gordon looking up at her, with those big dark eyes, she didn't have a prayer. Jennifer looked up at me, very unhappily. "I hate you."

I kissed her.

"I still hate you."

She made it through the tame rides easily. However, when she came off the children's roller coaster she was unsteady.

Gordon was screaming, "Can we do it again mom; please let's do it again."

I took pity on my fiancée and told Gordon we would take a little walk first. I thought Jennifer was going to kiss my feet.

We sat down by a play area for the little children, and watched him cavort with the other youngsters for about 15 minutes. When I called him back to us I told him we were going to continue looking for new rides instead of going back to the roller coaster. We found a train ride we could all fit on. Jennifer sat with Gordon. I sat alone in the seat behind them.

Jennifer looked tense. Gordon said, "It's a children's train ride; what could possibly scare you?"

When we got off a few moments later Jennifer was green. It was the train ride from hell. How they called this a children's ride was beyond me. It was a bumpy, 45-degree angle train ride that ran at speeds in excess of 20 miles per hour. It made sharp turns in dark tunnels, at unpredictable times. All the children got off the ride laughing and screaming for their parents to let them do it again. Gordon was no exception. I wanted the schematics for scientific purposes. I had to know the G forces involved in those turns. Jennifer was green. She needed a bathroom desperately. We went with Jennifer's needs first.

She was in there for quite a while, but when she exited the bathroom she looked a little better, not much; but better. She picked up Gordon. "I'm getting married tomorrow. I am not going on any more rides tonight. If I do they will have to take me to the church tomorrow in an ambulance. I will have to kill you because of it. I will miss you very much, but I want to get married. No more rides, okay?"

"Mommy it's 9:50, the park closes at 10 o'clock. That is ten minutes from now. There is no time to go on anymore rides."

"Are you sure you're not older than I am?"

"I'm positive."

"Come on you two it's time to go home."

******

Gordon fell asleep in his safety seat, before we made it to the highway. Jennifer and I held hands all the way to her home in Brighton. I parked the car in her driveway. I got out, went to her side, and helped her out of the car. As soon as I had her door closed, I forced her against the car, pressed our lips together, and forcefully pulled her body up against mine.

She hadn't been expecting anything like this. Her hands flapped around in the air, until they finally found their way around my neck.

I kissed her for a long time, before I let her come up for air. When her eyes re-focused on mine, I said, "Lady, tomorrow I am going to fuck you blind."

She held on to me as her body quaked. She pressed her head against my shoulder and bit it with her mouth. After a moment I felt the tension in her body leave, and her breathing returned to normal. I put her back on the ground, and let her try to stand on her own two feet.

She punched me in the chest. "God damn you Even, I just came."

I chuckled and put my head against hers. "Am I that good? Do you want to try it again?"

"Do you want to die on the driveway, with my grandmother looking through the window?"

"Should I wave to her?"

"If you want to get married with one arm, go ahead. Go home I have to get out of these wet panties. I will see you tomorrow at 4 PM. If you are late I will bury you alive."

"I wasn't late today. It was your grandmother's fault. By the way you owe the cookie jar another $10. That is a total of $60 in one day; I think that's a record."

"You owe the pretzel jar $10 also. You are a billionaire; be nice and pay my share."

"No one has ever accused me of being nice."

She walked towards her home, and her grandmother opened the front door for her. Jennifer turned and yelled, "LEARN TO BE NICE, QUICKLY!"

She kissed her grandmother as she walked in, but her grandmother stopped her.

"Did you steal that young man's virtue?"

"Grandmother, its high time somebody did, but I didn't."

"You smell like sex. Would you care to explain that to me?"

"No, not really; let's just say my soon-to-be husband has an excellent way of using and abusing the English language. He just abused my body with it."

Mrs. Stars laughed. "If he can do that to you with words, just imagine what he's going to do to you tomorrow with everything else."

"Grandma, you need a man."

"I'm too young for men my age."

*******

29. DO NOT DISTURB

I carried Gordon into the house when we got home. Getting up just after 6 A.M. and being active all day wiped him out. I could have shot cannons off in my room, and he would not have heard them. I took off his new clothes and hung them neatly in my closet. I put his PJs on, rested his head on a pillow, covered him with a blanket, and kissed him good night.

I went to my den and made a sign on poster board: "DO NOT DISTURB." I taped the sign to the outside of my bedroom door. I walked into my room, closed, and locked the door. I could see everyone thinking that Jennifer and I were consummating our marriage a little early.

I set my two alarm clocks, neither of which I could get to from my new bed. One was set for 12 PM, the other for 12: 05 PM. The first clock sounded like a car horn, the second like an oncoming freight train. If they didn't wake me up, Gordon would be all over me, because he would be frightened by the noise.

I didn't bother to shower. It would be the first thing I did when I woke up. The problem was I couldn't fall asleep. A certain young woman was not at home. She had every right to do what she felt comfortable doing. I had every right to worry about what she was doing.

At 17 years old, Rod was already sexually active for two years. He could talk a girl out of her panties before she realized they were in his hands. He went from skirt to skirt, just as Julius did, but he was a good man about it. Julius had a reputation, and for some reason girls couldn't stay away from him.

Rod may not have made love to his partners, but he was gentle and caring while he had sex with them. He had many repeat relationships.

Julius only knew one way to have sex hard and angry. When he fucked a girl, he fucked her as if he owned her body and soul. Many of his conquests loved it, and came back for more. Others felt degraded and never returned to him.

Rod started worrying about me being gay, because I never went after any member of the opposite sex. I assured him I wasn't, but I wasn't interested in sex either. I wanted to get into MIT and to do that I had to focus all my energies on my studies. It took me long enough to convince him, but I did. I'm sure he was responsible for more than 50 girls asking me for a date. I gently refused. I gave them the same reason I gave him. I told them I felt honored that they asked me, and let each one of them down politely. Unfortunately, for me, none of them seemed disappointed.

************

Just after 2 AM, I heard the pneumatic pumps kick in. She, no, they were home. ('Even relax or you going to have a heart attack. She is a big girl and she can defend herself. Let her grow up at her own pace, trust her. Divine, the sister you adored did a wonderful job helping her accomplish this task. Let your daughter prove it. Go to sleep; you have a big day today.')

I closed my eyes, and followed my own advice. My body was very happy I did, she was safe at home. That was all that mattered.

Delicious and Gray saw the sign on my door and laughed as they walked by. She stopped at the entranceway to her room, turned, and kissed him like a lover, not just a friend.

Gray returned her kiss with as much ardor as she put into it. His hands started to roam. She did not stop him when he went after her bottom, because it pressed her against his maleness. This excited her. However, when he went for her breasts, she protected them with her arms and said, 'No', I'm not ready for that yet.

Gray, to his credit, backed off immediately. "I am going to be with you for a very long time. I hope you feel about me, the way I feel about you. I want to continue going out with you. If you're not ready for a year, or two years, it's fine with me. Please remember, we going into stasis in 10 years, I would like to have children with you before then."

"Gray, you are my first boyfriend. I don't know how I feel about a long-term relationship yet. This is all new to me. Please don't push me, or rush me. Let me learn at my own pace."

"I promise I am not going to do to you what Rod did to Rosalynn. Please take all the time you want or need. I will be working on the spaceships frame for the next 10 years or longer. If you find you want me, I will always be around."

"When are we going out next?"

"Where would you like to go?

"I've always wanted to go flying."

"How did you know I was a pilot?"

"When you opened your wallet to pay for dinner tonight, your AOPA (Aircraft Owners and Pilots Association) card was visible."

"Don't take this the wrong way Delicious. Do you want to fool around in the air, what do you want to learn how to fly?"

"How much fooling around were you planning on doing?"

"When you're piloting an aircraft, you can't fool around."

"Is teaching me to fly like you see men teaching women how to play golf?"

"Unfortunately no; I can't put a nine iron in your hand, stand behind you, put my hips by your ass, my arm across your breasts, and on your downswing rub your pussy with my hand. If it was that easy, pilots would be lining up and paying 18 to 35-year-old women to learn how to fly."

"I'm not 18 yet."

"I know I would pay you double."

Delicious leaned forward and kissed him. It was not a friend kissing a friend. It was a promise of more to come.

"Good night Gray, I'll see you in the morning. Thank you for a very lovely evening."

Gray leaned forward and kissed her. "Thank you my sweet for a very delightful evening. I look forward to many, many, more of them, until you get sick of me, or until I am in the position your father finds himself this evening. Get some sleep you have to look gorgeous tomorrow afternoon."

He took a few backward steps, before he turned and walked towards his room.

Delicious knew she made the right decision, but it was a very hard decision for her to make. She wished she wasn't so wet down there, while they were talking. It made the decision to stop him so much harder. She had to talk to her dad...and to Roz. This freedom he gave me was going to be really hard to deal with. It was easier being held back. I had someone to blame for stunting my growth. Now it's only me out here, and the decisions I make have real and immediate consequences.

"Why did he have to break his word, and take her to bed tonight? He would have been married in 12 more hours. Dammit dad, I need to talk to you. I know what I'll do; I'll call you on your cell phone. If you are busy you won't answer it."

"I know its wrong dad. You must be letting her sleep; otherwise she will look like hell tomorrow afternoon. Here goes nothing."

My cell phone rang and I knew it had to be Jennifer. The bride always has jitters the night before she got married. She probably wants to yell or tear my head off for one reason or another. Imagine my surprise when I heard my daughter's voice on the other end.

"Dad, did I wake up Jennifer?"

"I don't know how you could do that, she's at her house with her grandmother, in Brighton. Why are you calling?"

"You sign, it says, "Do Not Disturb." I thought you and Jennifer got a head start on your wedding night."

"No, we didn't. I repeat, "Why are you calling?"

"Would it be okay with you if we talked for a while? I have a lot on my mind, and I need to talk to you. I need you to help me work on parts I can't figure out."

"I'll be in your room in a moment."

I put my new lounging jacket on, the one with the leather cuffs. I left my bedroom door open, just in case Gordon got up and walked to Delicious' room. I knocked twice, walked in, and found her fully dress lying on her bed.

I tried to lighten the mood in the room by saying, "I forgot my folio; I will be right back."

She cut me off at the knees. "Very funny dad; where is your giant cigar? Isn't that your 'Soprano' outfit?"

"Yes it is, tonight I am playing his therapist; what can I help you with little girl."

"Freedom is hard; I never thought it would be. I thought it would have a calming, relaxing feeling on me, but it doesn't. You have to watch everything you do, because suddenly everything you do has consequences. The responsibility is yours, not someone else's."

"Someone grew up in a hurry today. Did something happen you didn't want to happen?"

"No, my night was perfect, even though you tried to sneak out of the restaurant."

"We didn't want to interfere with your night. I told Gordon you wanted your privacy, and wanted to kill him when he waved to you."

"It didn't matter, it was over in a few seconds, and we were back to being by ourselves. Gray wants to make our arrangement exclusive. I told him I'm not ready for that type of arrangement. I told him he's my first boyfriend. I told him everything I felt, and that I needed time to grow. He said it was fine with him and he would be around for the next 10 years working on our project. If I decided I want him as much as he wants me, he would always be around. He is taking me flying next week, and I am looking forward to it. I like being with him. I'm afraid I will get carried away because of my feelings for him."

"I think you'd better explain that to me a little better."

"Please don't laugh at me, because when I'm with him, I get wet. Before the touching, and the kissing, while we're talking, I'm walking around flooded, and I don't know why."

"Yes you do. Be honest with yourself, you were out on your own with a handsome young man. You can do whatever you want. There is nothing stopping you anymore. You are trying out your wings for the first time. Many young birds don't fly the first time they leave the nest. They fall to the ground. Some of them are lucky. Their parents are around to save them. Others are not so lucky. They get injured. They become food for other animals, unless someone protects them. You are never going to be alone. I told you that the first week we were together. If you decided to leave the nest when you are 18 years old, I said there would be guards around you keeping you safe. The same is true now. I haven't abandoned you, I told you I trust you enough to go out on your own, and grow up a little at a time. You can't do that if I smother you every moment of the day. Your mother, my sister did a wonderful job helping you become a strong, independent young woman. I don't believe there is anything anyone could put in front of you that you cannot do. Experience it, enjoy it, put it on your things to do list, and do it before you're too old. Enjoy your life, don't rush through it. Don't let Gray make your decisions for you. If you decide he is the one you want to have as your first man, enjoy it. If you decide he's not, release him by telling him so. Be honest with him, and yourself. As far as your leaking problem is concerned, wear a pad, and take an extra one with you, just in case."

She leapt off the bed and into my arms. "You know for a new dad you are pretty good at this stuff."

"It's not that hard. I think of what I would normally have said in this situation. Then I reversed it, because you know what any man would do is going to be wrong. Therefore the new answer becomes the right answer. You tell it to the young woman. She tells you how smart you are. Then she tells all her woman friends how intuitive you are about a woman's feelings, and problems. If the man is single they come after you like a swarm of bees. He gets lucky more often than not. If he's married, his wife sees all these women coming after him. She decides that he has a better catch than she thought he was. She starts treating him better than she was before. It's just logic.

Delicious kissed me. "Dad you are so full of shit."

"I knew I could get you. That will be $10 please."

"You fed me that whole line of garbage at 3 o'clock in the morning just to get $10 out of me?"

"Yes, I told Gordon he would be the winner Wednesday night. I want that jar has full as possible."

"You are impossible dad. What time are you getting up?"

"We are getting up around noon."

"Three hours to get ready for your wedding. That is more than enough time. I will see you then. Good night dad, thank you for everything."

"My bill will be in the mail."

"So will my check."

30. I DON'T WANT TO FUCK THIS UP

I have two options; I can wake her up, or I can kill her. It's 9:30 AM, and my body clock informs me that I am awake. I don't wish to add money to my son's fortune, so I don't explain to my body clock exactly what I think of it, or tell it exactly where I want it to go. I look at that little bundle sleeping next to me, and I do not believe he moved all night. He looks so peaceful laying there. I use my cell phone and take several pictures of him.

It's much too early to start dressing for today's life altering event. I step into my new closet and dress casually. I go down to the kitchen only to find out I am not hungry. I decided to go for a walk to visit my sister. I don't want Gordon to wake up to an empty house, and start rummaging around for something to eat. I place a spoon, a bowl of cereal, a glass of milk, and orange juice on the table. I cover each of them in plastic wrap, and write my son a note:

Good morning my little man, I have gone for a walk to visit my sister's grave. It is 10 o'clock and I will be back in the house before 11 o'clock. Enjoy your breakfast. I have one word of warning for you. You are not allowed to play with Sequoia, unless an adult is with you. If you do, it will be considered a 'Bad Word.' You will not win the money in the pretzel jar. I love you, Dad.

I did not know which temptation would be greater for him. He loves playing with Sequoia, or at least that's what he thinks he's doing on IBM's marvelous machine. However, his eyes light up every time someone puts money into the pretzel jar. This was going to be a close call, but my money is on the pretzel jar. Today is Sunday, and as far as Gordon is concerned, in four days he would be richer than Croesus. He just might be after he starts investing in those penny stocks. I smiled inwardly and wagered that Grayson would purchase the same stocks Gordon would.

It is a warm, dry, perfect September morning as I walk towards Divine's resting place. Wildflowers had taken over the entire area, and it looks beautiful, just as my sister did. I knelt down and told her I know we have a daughter together. I am angry with her, because there was a way out of her problems. If she told me what was holding her to her marriage I could have bribed Julius, and had him out of life within hours, if not days. Our lives would have been so sweet together. I cried for the loss of the things that could have been.

Out of nowhere, a rain shower passed overhead. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, and it was raining heavily on me. Within moments I was soaked to the skin. Was my sister crying too? When it stopped I looked around and there was not a cloud in the sky, but I saw a rainbow. Divine really loved rainbows. When we were children she would stop to stare at them until they disappeared. She told me they were her good luck charm. If she was ever sad, they made her happy. If she was ever worried, her worries went away. She became a whole new person, and demanded me to be happy for her. Was she telling me to go on with my life and be happy for her? Was she was happy where she was? Was she in the stars awaiting my arrival? I promised her I would be there one day.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 07



I told her I was getting married to a wonderful woman who completed me. I was very happy and today was a new beginning for our daughter, and me. Our lives were going to be very interesting from this day forward, because Delicious was brilliant, and Gordon was as well. They were going to make a very interesting team as we build our spacecraft to go to the stars.

Yes, my dearest sister, we are coming to see you. It will take us some time, but we will be there.

"Dad, Gordon was worried. You said you would be back by 11 o'clock; its 11:30, are you alright?"

I turned, and Delicious was standing there in a robe and slippers. "Yes baby, I am fine. I've been talking with your mother. I guess I lost track of time."

"How did you get all wet?"

"A quick rain shower passed overhead. I guess I was lucky enough to be in the right place at the wrong time."

"You better come with me; you are soaked to the skin. You are going to get sick."

I laughed. "It's funny you should say that. If you remember how your mother put it in her diary, that's how you were conceived."

"I am on the pill dad. There will be no incest today. If you want to get someone pregnant, let it be Jennifer."

"I was just making a comparison between a freak snowstorm and a freak rainstorm. You may be a virgin, but you are too old for me to think about incest. I also knew you had black panties on under that belt you were wearing."

"It was not a belt; it was a micro-miniskirt."

"And George Washington really did chop down his father's cherry tree."

"Do you really want to get into this now; or should we start back and let Gordon know that you are okay?"

"We may as well continue. It's a seven minute walk back to the house."

"Most of our questions take longer to ask than seven minutes. What would be the sense and asking one?"

"It would take you a week to find out the answer to my question."

"You have never asked me a question I could not answer immediately."

"$10 into the cookie jar says I can ask you a question you can't answer immediately."

"Go ahead, I'm in."

"What was the name of Rod's first girlfriend? Watch your language because it will cost you more than $10."

"Have I ever told you how much I hate you dad? That was not a fair question. I thought you were going to ask me a question about science, or math. How am I supposed to know about the personal life of a man, who was dating someone when I wasn't born yet?"

"How, when, and where did Albert Einstein die?"

"He died of an aortic aneurysm on April 15, 1955 in a Princeton hospital; why?"

"Were you alive then?"

"You are a real prick dad. Einstein is one of the most famous scientists this world has ever had. Of course I would know about him. I have only known Rod since June, how would I know his sexual history?"

"How to Rod get Rosalynn to marry him?"

"I am not talking to you for the rest of the day. I will put my $20 into the pretzel jar. If you say another word to me, you are going to have to write down the words, "I DO" to marry Jennifer, because I will have broken your jaw."

"It has been an experience talking to you. We are home. I must assure my son that I did not fall into a deep hole, and you had to rescue me. I would never live that down."

"I could always break your leg, and dig that hole later."

"You would need dynamite, blasting caps, and a truck to haul away the debris."

"I could always use Freolyte."

"Very good, that's 1 point for your side, and 99 points for mine. You may catch up to me one day."

"I hate you dad, I really, really do."

I stopped, pulled my daughter to me, and kissed her. "I hate you three times as much."

"I still want my winter home in Maui."

"Go to Maui, find a site that you want, and buy it. Design your dream house and give it to an architect. If that's what you really want, it's yours."

She kissed me, and hugged me so tight I thought she was going to break my ribs.

"You are too much dad. When I grow up I will think about it. By the way, I told you not to talk to me."

Gordon opened the front door and asked us if we were ever going to come inside.

"Yes we are. I was just waiting for Delicious to get all her bad words out of the way before we came inside. She is adding $20 to your Wednesday night winnings. Did you sleep well?"

"I don't remember falling asleep. When I woke up I was in your bed in my pajamas. It was almost 10:30. I read your note, ate my breakfast, and waited for you to come home. When you were late I got worried. I woke up Delicious, and showed it to her. She decided to check on you."

"It was very smart of you to do that Gordon. I lost track of time, and I could have been very late getting back. If I was late for my wedding I would be laying beside my sister soon after I said the words 'I DO.' Your mommy would not be happy with me."

"Do all women have a problem with men being late?"

"Let me shorten your sentence, and then I will answer it. ' Do all women have a problem with men?' The answer to that question is YES. You already know that the brain has two sides. Men use the logical side. Women use the artistic side. From the day a woman is born her goal in life is to change a man. (Dammit, I forgot to duck again.) I looked at Delicious and growled. That is why God made them beautiful. Men look at a flower and not only see its beauty, but wonder why it is so beautiful. They take apart the leaves, the stamen, the roots, and all the other parts of this beautiful organism and catalog each piece so future generations will know why it is so beautiful. They cannot do that to another human being, although when it comes to some woman they would love to. That is why women remain an enigma to men. That is what a woman uses against a man to trap him. She looks different, she walks different, and she smells different. He can't catalog the pieces of her, so he has to buy the entire package. Once she has him in her web, she stings him like a spider, folds him in her silk, waits for him to soften, and eventually eats him alive. (I ducked just in time.)"

"Dad, stop poisoning his mind. You know that's not true."

"Why is the divorce rate 52 percent of all marriages in the United States?"

"Because people have forgotten how to communicate with one another."

"Or in other words, Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars."

"Don't talk to me until after the wedding. I don't want to hurt you."

"Come on Gordon, it's time for us men to start getting ready."

"What are you talking about dad? It's 12:15 PM. We don't leave until 3 PM. How long is it going to take you to get dressed?"

"Do you see what I mean Gordon, Delicious does not know how to use logic. We have to change the sheets on the bed, and tidy up our room. We have to be sure when I bring your mother home tonight everything looks pretty. Then you will take your shower, while I will shave and take my shower. We will layout our clothes and make sure everything is perfect. At 2:30 PM we will begin dressing, and we will leave for the church on time, at 3 PM.

If we were women, we would put everything off until the very last moment, and start screaming that we were late. All it takes my son is a little planning and the right attitude."

Delicious screamed, turned, and ran up the stairs. Moments later Grayson walked down the stairs.

"Good morning; what did I miss?"

"Gray, if I were you I would be very complementary to my daughter's today. One wrong word and you could wind up on the floor."

"What did you do to her?"

"I was explaining to Gordon the difference in the hemispheres of the brain, between men and women. I did it using less than flattering terms, and she is a little upset now."

"Do you have body armor in the house?"

"I'm sorry; I left that off my Christmas list last year."

"The next time you decide to do that to her, would you make sure I am in Texas."

"What fun would that be?"

"I don't consider being black and blue fun. I don't consider going to an oral surgeon fun. I more than like her Doctor Luck. I would like to get close to her, but I don't want to get hit when I do."

"You can call me Even, and my daughter told me how you feel about her. I did not tell her what to do, because that decision is hers and hers alone. As far as easing up on her, that's not what I am doing to her. I'm helping her grow. She has never had to deal with anyone like me. I confuse her, and she needs to be confused. Her mother was always there to protect her, not only from her father, but from every other male around her. My sister protected her too much. During these last few years of her life Delicious has always been on the offensive, against boys her own age. She can't play those games anymore, because she's not in school. She's not in the confines of the building. It's a big bad world out here, and you are part of it. She likes you a lot, much more than a lot, and you are confusing her just as I am. It is good for her to be confused. She has to work through it by herself, in order to grow. You continue doing what you're doing. I'll continue doing what I am doing. We will both watch her blossom into a beautiful rose. She is going to be a marvelous young woman."

"She already is Even, she takes my breath away."

"We leave at 3 o'clock on the dot. My fiancé will kill me if I'm late for my own wedding. Please be ready to go."

"You mean I can't go like this?"

"You are Delicious' escort. You will miss our organizational meeting tomorrow, on the building of our starcraft, because you will be in a Denver hospital. We will record it for you. When they find a way to reattach your head to your body, we will play it for you."

*******

My son was dressed perfectly. I put him in a cranberry colored shirt, and matching hanky in his jacket. Today he was not wearing his Keds; he was wearing his black boots. He looked dashing to me, but as he looked in the mirror there was a bit of concern on his face.

"What is the matter Master Gordon? The female of the species will be falling all around your feet because of how dashing you look."

"It's this shirt dad. I've never seen a man where this color before. Mom wears this color. Grandma wears this color. I've seen many women wear this color. I've never seen a man where this color before."

"I will change it for you if you are that uncomfortable, but come with me first and I will show you the shirts I have in my closet. If you think women only where colors, I am going to have to throw most of my shirts out."

As Gordon walked into my closet his mouth opened. Thank goodness he didn't see my old clothes. If he didn't like plaids, he would have hated everything in there.

"You wear these colors dad?"

"I haven't worn all of them yet, but I'm going to. I'm going to dress nice for your mother every day, because I love her. It doesn't take any more time or effort to dress nice, then it does to dress like a slob. I think if we dress nice your mother will be happy with us. Don't you think so?"

"Yes I do dad. Mommy always dresses nice too."

"Your mommy is beautiful inside and outside. Don't ever forget that."

"I won't."

We walked downstairs, and Gray was reading the paper at the kitchen table. I gave Gordon the Sudoku, and I took the local portion as we waited for my Princess to make her entrance. God did she ever make an entrance.

We heard her walking down the stairs, so we folded the newspapers and stood up. When she entered the kitchen, we stopped breathing. She was stunning. Her hair was up, her makeup was perfect, and the dress she was wearing was... breathtaking. Gray and I could neither speak, nor move.

Gordon said, "You look very pretty Delicious."

"Thank you Gordon, you look very handsome. What happened to those two?"

"I think they were waiting for the other you, and they got this you instead."

"Do I look that different?"

"Yes, now you look like a movie star."

"Thank you Gordon, that was very nice of you to say."

I said to my daughter, "You are never allowed to look that beautiful and leave this property unguarded. You look ravishing, you look exactly like your mother."

"Don't you dare make me cry. It took me an hour to do my hair and makeup."

"I will not make you cry, I promise. I just want to know how much lubricant you had to use to slide into that dress."

"As God is my witness dad, if you start up with me now you will not make it to the church on time, if at all."

"I stopped you from crying, didn't I?"

"You son of a bitch."

"I will put the $10 in the pretzel jar for you." Gordon watched me do it.

"Are you going to say anything about the way I look Gray?"

"You are positively stunning. I have many other things I could say, but you asked me not to push you, so I won't. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. You will find that out today, at the reception. You will have to beat every man that approaches you off with a stick, because they may not want to take no as an answer."

"Lady, gentlemen, it is the witching hour. It is the time for us to leave. I don't wish to be late and receive the ire of my blushing bride. So far I know she bites, kicks, and punches with authority. I don't want to find out that she is a black belt in any of the Oriental arts. Gray I think you should drive. I'm not sure she could get her feet from the gas pedal to the brake pedal. That skirt is much too tight."

"You said you would not start with me, dad."

"I'm going to be in a different car, and I'm going to be behind you. If you want to play bumper cars with the people in front of you, you will clear the way for me."

She threw her purse on the floor, and said, "That's it, you're dead meat."

Gray grabbed her around her waist and pulled her body against his. He kissed her neck, and whispered something into her ear. I didn't hear what he said, but whatever it was it took to steam out of her anger.

Delicious looked at me. "You should thank your lucky stars Gray is here. If he wasn't I would be your only child."

"I guess Gray doesn't know that you have one tiny weakness, does he? The same weakness your mother mentioned in her diary. Do you remember it Delicious? How my sister, your mother used to scream in agony when I did it to her. Should I tell Gray all about it so he can do it to you at his leisure?"

"You wouldn't do that to me. You wouldn't be that evil or mean. That would break all the ties between us. It would make you a pervert of the highest order."

"You would give up everything, including your house in Maui because I would tell Gray that one little thing? It's after 3 PM. I have to go to my wedding. I'm going to think about this. I'm going to laugh about it all the way to the church."

"Don't you do this to me dad, don't you even think about it."

"Let's go everyone; I'm locking up the house."

Delicious walked by me, with fire in her eyes, in that smoking hot dress. Gray was inches behind her. Gordon fell in step with me.

Before she reached her Q7, she hit Gray.

I yelled, "If you touch him again, you can stay home, or you can leave here permanently. The choice is yours."

There must've been a tenor in my voice that frightened her. She looked at me, as I returned her glare. She said something to Gray, kissed him and hugged him for a moment. He didn't let her go. She looked up at him again. This time, he kissed her.

"Okay you two, its five minutes after three; I am leaving. I will see you at the church."

Delicious said, "I thought you were following me?"

"I wasn't sure if you two were going to make it to the church on time."

"I want my leash back."

"No you don't. You just think you do. It will get easier in 15 or 20 years."

"I needed to hear that right now dad."

She tried to get into the car but her skirt was impossibly tight. Finally she gave up and asked Gray to help her get into the car. Apparently he made her an offer she couldn't refuse, although by the look on her face she wanted to. She was furious.

With her head down she stalked to the passenger side and waited. She was so hot steam was rising from the ground around her. She finally turned, and allowed Gray to put his hands on her hips. He lifted her and placed her on the passenger seat. She sat there like a stone. He started to pull the seatbelt across her body.

She screamed, "I'll do it."

Gray walked around to the driver's side, gave me a thumbs up and a big smile. He closed the door, and started the engine, and we were ready to roll.

I opened the gates, set the timers and the alarms. Delicious had delayed us by only 15 minutes.

"Do you understand now why I wanted to leave so early Gordon?"

"I think so. Do women always slow you down when you have to go somewhere?"

"If you are going to use it as a general rule: YES. If it's something you want to do, you always add 30 minutes or more. If it's something they want to do you always add 15 minutes."

"Do they know that rule?"

"No, and you are never to tell them. The only way you can be guaranteed a woman will be at the place she is supposed to be, at the time she is supposed to be there, is on a day like today, when she is getting married. It would take an act of God to keep your mother or any other woman from being at the altar to say the words 'I Do.' A nuclear war would come in an extremely distant second."

"Is it caused by the need to reproduce?"

"I've never thought of it quite that way, but a woman can reproduce without being married. You are a prime example. However, I think that is worth further study. I will ask several of my friends who are into the field of psychology to delve into that question and see what they come up with. That was a brilliant question Gordon, absolutely brilliant."

"I know."

We didn't take Interstate 70 for the short ride into town. After Gray and I hit the obligatory pothole, we went under the highway and made a left turn on Stanley Road, which paralleled the interstate. It turns into Colorado Boulevard, the main street of our little town.

Our church is so small; it is not even listed on area maps. It is on the site where an old warehouse used to be that had gone on used for years. Then this young priest, Father McAuley, did a walking census of our town to see how many Catholics were there and if they would be interested in helping him restore it and make it a church. There were more than 100 Roman Catholics in the area. The closest Catholic church to us was the Cathedral in the center of Denver. Driving there every weekend during the winter months, with snow and ice on the ground, was asking for trouble. Just the thought of having a church in our own little community made everyone happy to donate time and money to this cause. The prime mover in this event was Rosalynn Laver. Rosalynn had the ear of my attorney, Rodney Laver. Actually she had him by the balls, and when she wanted him to do something, she squeezed them tight. In this case, she used a vise.

**********

"Rod, I want to have this little baby of ours baptized in my church."

"Don't worry about it baby, the warehouse will be completed in plenty of time for our little one."

"I don't want my baby baptized in an old warehouse. I want our new baby baptized in my new church. Tear down that damn warehouse and build me a small church."

"It could take me years to do that honey. I have to get it approved through the city council, have plans drawn up, and get them approved by building and zoning. There are a dozen other things I would have to do before we can even put a shovel in the ground. It will be impossible to do before this little one is born."

"I guess you should tie your dick in a knot, because you're not getting laid, until I have my church."

"Honey, that's not fair. You're giving me less than seven months to do 2 1/2 years work."

"I would suggest you get started. Even says you are the smartest lawyer he has ever known; it's time you proved it."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 07



"You are using cruel and inhumane punishment. Even prisoners get conjugal visits."

"I didn't say you could not visit. I said you could not drive in."

"That's worse than not visiting."

"The choice is always yours Rod. Build me my church; I don't like driving into Denver, with my children, every Sunday. A small church for 600 or 700 people, that shouldn't be so hard."

"What happened to a church for 100 people?"

"I was just making sure you were listening to me. Get to work."

He did; he came to see me.

*************

"Even, I need a favor."

"You look terrible; what's the matter?"

"Roz wants to baptize our new baby in a church."

"That shouldn't be a problem; the warehouse will be finished in plenty of time."

"She doesn't want it baptized in a reconditioned warehouse. She wants it baptized in a new church. She has threatened to cut me off if she doesn't have her way."

"Oh my Lord, poor Rod, a fate worse than death. Dante's Inferno level 8."

"Stop fooling around with me, Even. Help me figure out a way around this."

"It's not my job to help you. It's your job to help me. Think of something."

"If I think of something will you help me?"

"Why do I have a feeling you have already thought of something, and are just reeling me in?"

"I would never do that to you. I am your friend."

"You are also a sneaky bastard. What do you have in mind?"

"I want you to come to the city council meeting with me tomorrow night, and just sit there without saying a word. I will take care of everything."

"How much trouble are you going to get me in? How long am I going to be in jail?"

"I would never do anything to you that would put you behind bars. I will swear to that."

"You would swear to anything as long as you could get laid."

"Even you know me too well."

*********

The following evening I found myself sitting with 30 other members of our community. My name was prominently displayed as last on the agenda to speak. Rod's name was first.

"Members of the Council, I would like to speak to you tonight about the warehouse that sits in the northeast corner of Fourth Street and Evergreen Avenue. It has been vacant for five years. It has no owner of record. It is rusted and in ill repair. No taxes have been collected on that property, and no bid to buy it has ever been made. I would like to tear down the building and put up a new structure in its place. The new structure would not bring any new tax dollars to this community, but it will be a definite benefit to many of our citizens, and a beautification to the area. If the council can approve it tonight, and call for a second reading as soon as possible, I can begin that process immediately. Thank you very much."

"Mister Laver you said that the new building will not bring any new tax dollars to the community. What do you intend to build on that site?"

"I intend to build a Roman Catholic Church for Father McAuley."

"Is there a reason for this largess?"

"Yes there is. We are relatively small community, and we have just over 100 members of the Catholic community living here. In order to practice their religion, each weekend they must travel over 140 miles, into the center of Denver, to do it. In the summer that is not a problem. Once it starts to rain, and snow, when our wintery weather sets in that becomes a very hazardous situation. Many of you are very aware of this because your houses of worship are distance away also. There are no houses of worship in our community. This small church will be the first."

"How small is the church you thinking of building?"

"I am not thinking of building a cathedral. I am talking about a building with a capacity of less than 150 people."

"Are you going to have spires and bells?"

"Considering our winter weather, I think that would be a foolish undertaking. No there will be no spires or bells."

"Thank you Mister Laver, the council will take it under advisement."

"Thank you very much members of the Council."

********

There were several other speakers before my name came up. They talked about road improvement, updating the library, and a host of other small city items. Then it came my turn, and Rod approached the lectern again.

"Mister Laver you have had your chance to speak."

"You are correct. I am now speaking as the attorney for Doctor Even Luck, who is in the audience this evening. Doctor Luck is in favor of building the church as quickly as possible. To that end he proposes the following: He will contractually obligate himself, upon approval of the Council to allow building to begin on this new structure, to fund the Idaho Springs Police and Emergency Medical Service Departments for a period of five years. He will purchase all new modern vehicles with all the new electronic equipment available for both departments. We are a city of 1717 people. If we put this savings into our general fund, and use it wisely over that period of time, all our current and immediate future needs can be met without borrowing a penny from the banks. We will save thousands of dollars on interest and fees alone. Using cautious figures, the savings per year for these two departments will be $1.35 million, or approximately over the five-year period $18 million. That is a very large savings for a very small community as ours. As an attorney, and a citizen of this community, I humbly request this Council to approve this measure tonight, before closing this meeting. You may never get another bite at this apple. Thank you very much."

The 28 people sitting in the room turned towards me, cheered, applauded. I was ready to kill my attorney. He could have at least warned me about what he was doing. It wasn't the money. I had more coming in than I could ever spend. I just hated being the center of attention, and he knew it. I was going to speak to Rosalynn, and my friendly attorney was going to be in intense pain for a week.

The president of the council pounded his hammer (It was a real hammer) and called the meeting to order. He asked the members of the Council for a voice vote on the motion to accept Doctor Even Luck's proposal. Seven members voted yes; there were no dissenting votes. The motion passed unanimously.

The president said, "Mister Laver as soon as you can get a contract made up, and signed by your client, we will submit it to the city's attorney for approval and the Council will sign it. As soon as that is done you may begin work."

Rod opened his briefcase and pulled out a 47-page contract. He asked for a moment, while his client signed it. He brought it to me and smiled. I smiled and signed it for him. He knew he was in trouble, because I never smiled when I signed anything.

Rod handed the contract to the city clerk who stamped it and gave it to the Council president. He laughed, "There's nothing like being prepared is there Mister Laver?"

"There are very few times in the history of any town that someone offers you an opportunity to save $18 million over five years. I believed in my heart that this was a foregone conclusion. There was always a possibility I could be wrong, but I doubted it."

As everyone was cheering and talking at the front of the room, with Rod and the members of the Council, I was talking with Rosalynn on my cell phone.

"Roz did he tell you what he was going to do?"

"He did mention something that involved you."

"Did he mention exactly how involved I was going to be?"

"No, but he promised you would not be in jail for bribery."

"Didn't you think that was nice of him; keeping me out of jail, while using my money to keep the city happy."

"Exactly how happy is the city tonight?"

"The city is $18 million happier than it was before Rod began talking."

"I guess I'm getting my church."

"Yes you are getting your way, and your church, but it's going to cost my friend, and my attorney a great deal of pain."

"Are you going to fire him?"

"I could never do that to him. It would be like cutting off by nose to spite my ears. No what I have in store for your husband is worse than death. He is not going to get laid for a week, is he Rosalynn?"

"Even, you are evil. He is going to come home tonight believing he is going to have the hottest night of his life, and you want me to put him in the deep freeze?"

"When you tell him "NO" tell him it's a present from me. Don't tell him how long it is going to last, but each night tell him "NO" and it's a present from me. He will go absolutely nutty, and beg me for forgiveness. On the eighth night he probably will not approach you for fear of rejection, and hearing those magic words "It is a present from me." He will break down and cry. He will never pull another stunt like this on me again."

"Is it the money Even?"

"I have more money than I know what to do with Roz. He had people stand up, look at me, and applaud. He knows I hate being the center of attention, but that's what he did to me. All I'm doing is getting EVEN. Father McAuley is going to love you. You are getting your new church. You will have it by the time your daughter is born, and she will be the first infant to be baptized there. Rod will remember this lesson until the day he dies. He will never do this to me again."

"I think he's going to make an 11th commandment after this week. ' Don't do anything to Doctor Even Luck that could cause irreparable harm to my dick."

**************

As Delicious turned right off 4th Street, and onto Evergreen, she came to an abrupt halt. I stopped close behind her. Police were there, directing traffic as the buses disgorged my friends and colleagues from the hotel in Denver. One by one, each bus emptied, and left the area followed by the next bus. After the buses left the area traffic resumed. We pulled into the reserve spaces in parking lot by the church. It was 3:35 PM, and I was on time for my wedding.

I walked inside the chapel, holding my son's hand. One of my colleagues yelled, "I told you he couldn't find the church by himself. He had to have a little boy lead him here."

I knew this was going to be the beginning of a long day for me, because my son was laughing at me.

I could tell when my daughter walked in, because all eyes went from me to her. I reached out my hand, and she walked to me.

"Honored guests, colleagues and friends, it is with great pride I would like to introduce to you my 17 year old daughter, Delicious Luck."

There was a little confusion and first, and a small smattering of applause. However, once it started the applause grew louder and louder. Delicious waved, stood by me, holding me tight. After a moment or so, I asked Gray to escort her to her seat. Every eye in the house followed her there, including mine. She was a vision of loveliness. (Divine look what we made.) Now was not the time to cry.

I said to Gordon, "Why don't you join your sister, it appears your mommy is running a little bit late."

"Doesn't she know the rules?"

"Do you remember what I told you? You never tell a woman the rules. You only assume they know to be on time for their wedding."

"I heard a joke about the word assume."

"If you tell that joke about the word assume you lose all the money in the pretzel jar."

"Even if I whisper it to you?"

"Remember the honor code, it will serve you well."

"Okay dad, I'll tell you that joke on Thursday. Mom's here, I can see her dressed in all white."

"Hurry to your seat, the fun is about to begin."

Rod came over and asked me if I was ready to bite the bullet.

I replied, "No, but I'm ready to get married."

"Even after all these years you are still as humorless as you were when you were five."

"I had you laughing on the floor Friday."

"I could not believe that came out of your mouth. It was so not you Even. It was so funny if a comedian had said it, it would've been funny."

"So what you're telling me is even a blind squirrel can find an acorn, is that it?"

"Yes that would sum it up."

"Rod you should be happy I love you. If you or anyone else I would fire you on the spot."

"If you fired me you would have no employees."

"Wrong, I would have Delicious."

"She doesn't count; she is your daughter."

"She is also the best damn transcriptionist I've ever seen."

"Do you still want me to be your best man?"

"You have never been the best man. I just let you think you were to keep you happy. You heard what Divine said about you. You also read what she wanted me to do with you. I was a really nice guy and kept you around."

"Even you are so full of shit it's coming out of your ears."

"That's funny; I can hear you just fine."

"Don't you start with me Even; I'll publish your memoirs."

"You will not, especially with our NDA."

"I swear you stay up at night reading that contract."

"I keep telling you it's in the vault at Wells Fargo. I haven't seen it in years."

"I don't like you Even Luck. You are getting on my nerves."

"I want you to remember back to the city Council meeting, before you were able to start building this church. Do you remember what happened when you got home that evening?"

"You would not do that to me again, not again, Even. Please tell me you won't do that to me again. I couldn't survive going through that another time. I've just been fixed, and had a very long dry spell. Please don't do it again."

"Why are you trying to get me angry on my wedding day? Why are you determined to call me what I am not. My sense of humor is different from yours, but I do have a sense of humor; just ask Roz."

"I promise I'll be very good for the rest of the day, the rest of the week, the rest of the month, the rest of my life. Don't do anything rash. I am your best friend. I am your lawyer. I have your best interest at heart at all times. I may have abused you every once and again but that will never happen in the future."

"Rod, you are so full of shit. Help me get married, and let's get out here."

He screamed at me, "I hate you Even Luck!"

I walked past the front row with a huge smile on my face. Delicious stopped me. "What did you do to Rod now?"

"I did the same thing you used to do to him. You can't do it anymore and I can. It felt devilishly good."

"Dad, you are evil."

"Rod said the same thing. You must be rubbing off on me." (I moved out of the way of the left across, just in time.)

I asked my daughter, "Am I getting quicker, are you slowing down, or is it that dress? I love that dress."

She screamed, "You're dead. Make sure you sign your papers over to Jennifer before the parties over. I'm throwing you off the roof. You are dead."

My friends sitting behind her were shocked by her display of anger. I said to them, "My daughter doth protest too much. Her love for me knows no bounds. Except of course when her temper gets in her way, and that is when her Irish gets up. Or is it her Italian, or Greek, or Lithuanian, or Latvian. I forget exactly what heritage we are, but she gets mad really easy."

My friends in the Chapel were hysterical. I mean all my friends. My daughter was ready to kill me. Gray was looking for a way to escape, but he was on the inside of the pew instead of by the Isle. He was trapped.

I pulled Delicious to me and hugged her, while I had her arms trapped at her sides. I whispered in her ear, "One day I'm going to throw you a wedding in the Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception. It holds 2500 people, and they are going to be hanging off the ceiling to see you. You are so beautiful today, why are you so angry. Everyone's here to have a good time. Enjoy yourself, relax, and remember, breathe."

"I can't, I think I love him."

"As soon as we finish taking pictures, go home. Come to the party, or don't come to the party, we won't mind. Think with your head, not with your hormones. Remember I will always love you, whether you are a virgin or not. It is your decision."

The music started and we were ready to rock 'n roll. Jennifer was a vision in white. I mean she was a vision. She floated down the aisle without touching the floor. She was escorted by her grandmother. When they reached me, Mrs. Stars said, "Please take good care of her, she deserves it."

I smiled at Jennifer, but I replied to Mrs. Stars, "I am going to give Jennifer everything she deserves, and a little bit more."

Mrs. Stars laughed because she knew exactly what I meant. Jennifer did too.

Father McAuley went through the ritual of marriage, and in 20 minutes we went from a single man and a single woman, to a couple joined forever before God and man. We sealed our union with a kiss that raised a portion of me that was supposed to stay silent in front of so many people. Thank goodness the tuxedo jacket was long enough to keep it covered. However, my bride took notice.

She smiled and whispered, "Stand and Deliver."

"It is standing, and if we were in a closet I would deliver it right now."

Our son approached and yelled, "Mommy do you feel any different now?"

"I have a different name now, and very soon you will too."

"How did you do that?"

"You just watched. I got married, and sometimes, when a girl gets married she takes the boy's name. I chose to take my husband's last name. My name now is Mrs. Jennifer Ann Stars Luck."

"You have four names now instead of three."

"If anyone were to ask me my name, I would say I am Mrs. Jennifer Luck. I would leave out the two middle names."

"When Doctor Luck adopts me, I will be Gordon Oliver Stars Luck. Right?"

"You are absolutely correct Gordon."

"So instead of being a 'GOS' I will be a 'GOSL'."

"If that's what you want to be, that's what you can be."

"I think I'll like being a 'GOSL.'

I couldn't help myself when I asked my son, "Will it be better than being a goose?"

"Oh yes dad, you can cook a goose. You can't cook a GOSL."

"Excellent comparison Gordon, a mind-boggling comparison."

"I know."

Jennifer and I looked at each other and laughed.

******

The church was empty, except for those of us who were going to take part in the photos. We had two photographers for speed and efficiency. After 45 minutes they were done. Gordon had two girlfriends hanging all over him. One girl was blonde, with ringlets past her shoulders. The other was a dark-haired girl with eyes of a violet. She was going to be a stunner when she grew up.

When Gordon spoke the girls' mouths were open in rapt attention trying to understand what he was speaking about. They probably did not have a clue. When we were ready to go he ran over to us and asked, "Dad can Danielle and Brandy come with us?"

I hated to burst his bubble, but I did. "Gordon we only have one child safety seat and that is for you. Tell the young women we will meet them at the party. You will continue your conversations there. Okay?"

Without answering, he turned on his heel and flew back to his new friends. I told Jennifer the story I told Delicious about the sex manuals.

She asked, "Am I one of the married women in that group?"

"I hope I can get you pregnant before he can get to you. God knows you are beautiful enough."

I received a kiss for that remark.

I raised my voice and said, "Gordon we have to leave for the party."

To my absolute amazement he shook hands with both girls, before he ran to us. This was not normal behavior for a four-year-old boy when he says goodbye. I had to keep reminding myself that Gordon is no ordinary four-year-old.

Delicious and Gray were canoodling by her car. Jennifer looked at me and I didn't say a word. I helped her in to our car, and the 15 foot long train that came along with the gorgeous gown became a bit of a problem. I folded it, rolled it, and re-folded it, nothing worked.

Jennifer said, "Stop." She got out of the car, lifted a flap of material in the back of the dress, and told me to unzip the train.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 07



"After I struggle with this thing for five minutes, now you tell me it is held together by a zipper?"

"I didn't think of it before. Remember, I just got married, and I have one big thing on my mind."

"I will forgive you, and give you that big thing as soon as possible."

"Dad my friends have left can we go now?"

"Your wish is our command Master Gordon. Did your young ladies mention your shirt?"

"Yes they did dad. They thought it was cute. Brandy said I was cute. She is six years old. Is she too old for me?"

Jennifer nearly lost her last meal, whenever that was. She was laughing so hard, I had to help her remained standing. I helped Gordon into his seat, and made sure my wife was safely buckled in. I did not want to lose her now.

As I was driving my thoughts returned to my daughter. I was not worried about her; I was happy for her. Maybe she was ready for sex, maybe not, but that was not my decision to make. If it was Grayson she picked, he was a good man. If she decided to wait, again that was her choice. I didn't expect to see them at the party one way or the other. Gray wanted to talk about their future, but he is smart enough to know her boundaries. Only time will tell.

"Husband, what you grinning about?"

"Wife, exactly what you think I am thinking about. I'm very happy for her."

"This is a sudden change in attitude. May I ask what caused it?"

I prepared myself for what was to come. "NO!"

She didn't hit me; I didn't know why. Maybe it was the ring on her finger. Should I ask her? Hell no, I'm not out of my mind; yet.

She sat there smiling contentedly, and I watched her carefully. Every time I turned, her smile got bigger. Finally, I have to ask, "Why are you smiling?"

"You are so easy Even. You are just dying to tell me, and you were hoping I would beg to hear it. We have 30 more miles to get to Denver. You don't have a prayer of getting there without telling me the entire story."

From the back seat my little traitor chimed in. "Is this part of the spider story dad?"

"Gordon do you remember the rules about not telling women our secrets? You just broke one of the rules."

"I thought the rules only referred to them being late all the time."

"You are killing me Gordon. There is a woman in the front seat, and she is not supposed to hear this."

"She's not a woman daddy, she's my mommy."

I was dead; just bury me next to my sister. Jennifer had a look on her face of complete and utter victory. She had not yet fired her first shot, and I was mortally wounded.

"Tell me the spider story Gordon."

In perfect detail, my son did. The blade pierced my heart in the left ventricle. I would bleed out in 18 minutes.

"Tell me the late story Gordon."

"Which one mommy; there are three stories about women being late."

"Tell me all of them, one at a time, and don't leave anything out."

"I never leave anything out mommy."

He didn't. Not a verb, adverb, consonant, or vowel, not a word was missing, or an inflection of my voice. My son had eviscerated me from groin to gullet. I must have looked like that poor young deer I had killed in the forest. Only I was not bleeding, because my heart had pumped its last ounce of blood onto the floor."

"Is that all daddy told you about women today?"

"No, daddy told me about the difference between the hemispheres of the brain."

I pulled over onto the shoulder of the road and stopped the car. I turned and said, "Gordon if you say one more word I am going to walk in front of the car and lie down. I'm going to let your mother drive over me, then back up over me. I will let her repeat this process until there is nothing left of me. Are we okay now?"

"Yes dad, we are fine."

"Thank you Gordon." I pulled out onto the roadway and continued our trip.

Jennifer's smile was so wide I thought her face would crack.

"WHAT?"

"I love being married to you Even. I have enough ammunition to last me until our 10th anniversary. From your reaction to the hemisphere speech, if I ever get it out of him, I have you for the rest of my life."

I reached over and did something I wanted to do since we met. I squeezed her breast. The smile on her face evaporated, and her bright eyes turned to smoke.

"Bastard."

Here comes the cavalry. "Mommy owes the pretzel jar $10."

"She will owe a lot more before this evening is over. She has to obey the honor code or she will be in trouble?"

"Yes, everyone obeys the honor code. It wouldn't be right if mommy didn't."

"So far, my love, you owe $70 to that jar. The rules of the house go like this: the pretzel jar; then safety, water, and food. The pretzel jar always goes first."

"Gordon, close your eyes and cover your ears."

"Mommy you are going to go over $100. No one has ever done that before; not even Delicious when she is angry, and she gets angry a lot."

"Thank you for that information Gordon, now cover your ears and close your eyes."

"Okay, dad you are going to have to keep count."

"I will, I promise."

Jennifer asked, "Can you hear me Gordon?"

"No mommy, I can't hear you."

"How were you able to answer my question if you couldn't hear me?"

"I think I'd better do a better job covering my ears."

"So do I, because if you hear what I say to your dad, you are going to get a spanking from both of us."

You could see him compress the palms of his hands against his ears. It wasn't necessary to ask him again if he could hear us.

"Even, I will follow your stupid rules as long as you fuck me into oblivion. I have waited a long time for tonight, please don't disappoint me."

"Jennifer if you believe you have waited a very long time think about me. I have a 17-year-old daughter I never knowingly took part in creating. Almost 18 years of abstinence to your four-year drought. I may not know what I am doing, but I learn very quickly. What I learn I don't forget. Tell me if you like something. If you don't like something tell me. We will make one hell of a team after the first few weeks. I will know your body like I know my laboratory. There will not be one millimeter of you I will not know intimately. I know the human body in total. I will know your body better than that. I will not disappoint you, not now, not ever. I will bet every penny I have on that statement. I have a little surprise for you a little bit later on. I love you. I fell in love with you the moment I saw you on the airplane. When you opened the door to your home near Fairbanks my heart was so full of love for you I could've taken you on the floor then and there. Unfortunately Michael needed me more desperately than my desperate desire for you. I wished I had not promised God and myself to wait until today to have you, but I did. We made it, and we will appreciate it for the rest of our lives."

Jennifer had tears in her eyes, when my little traitor asked, "Is mommy finished yet; my ears hurt."

Jennifer reached back, tapped him on his knee, and let him know it was okay to open his eyes and release his hands from his ears.

"Did mommy reach $100 dad?"

"No Gordon, she only said one bad word. Mommy owes the pretzel jar $80."

"She has three more days to break the record."

"Are you hoping that your mommy keeps saying bad words?"

He thought about that for a moment and shook his head. "Mommy never used to say bad words until she met you. You must be a bad influence on her."

"Have you ever heard the term, 'Opposites Attract, Parallels Repulse?"

"I heard the first part, but not the second part."

"That's because no one knows what it means. If you have two magnets, where one is positively charged, and the other is negatively charged, when you put them in close proximity to each other they will connect. 'Opposites Attract.'

However, if you take two magnets, charge them both positively, if you put them in close proximity to each other, they will push themselves apart. 'Parallels Repulse.' Sometimes your mother and I are opposites. At other times we are parallels. We have only known each other for a short time. We will work our way together until we are both 'Neutrally Charged.' We will neither be forced together nor forced apart. We will both be individuals, who love each other, and love our independence from each other. Your mother will go snow skiing, while I ride my snowmobile. Do you know what that means?"

Gordon looked perplexed. "No dad, I have no idea what it means."

"The answer is very easy Gordon. It means we both love snow."

"Dad that was a very long explanation for a very short answer."

"I bet you could repeat every word of it."

"Why would I want to?"

"You would be the only person in the room to know that 'Opposites Attract, Parallels Repulse, and why."

*******

The valet congratulated us, and took our car away. The three of us went up to the top floor of the hotel, where Rod did his introductory speech again. He was more humble this time.

We walked in to a thunderous round of applause, and the tapping of glasses. I immediately complied by kissing my bride.

Gordon pulled on my sleeve, and asked if he could join his two friends, who were waving at him. I set him free and reminded him he was going home with Roz and Rod this evening. There was no sign of Delicious and Gray , and I was not surprised.

The orchestra started playing, and I took my wife into my arms and began to dance with her.

Jennifer put her head against my chest. I knew she could feel the beat of my heart, because I was so happy, and so in love with her. We moved slowly around the floor, my two left feet never leaving the ground for fear of crushing hers. I kept kissing the top of her head, and telling her how much she meant to me, and my new life. She set me free from the burdens of my past, and I could never do enough to repay her for this wonderful kindness. By the time our dance ended she was crying. I handed her a handkerchief to dry her eyes, and when she composed herself she said, "Even Luck, I don't care if you know both your parents, you are still a bastard."

I couldn't help but laugh, and when I did she hit me. Our guests roared with laughter.

The orchestra continued playing as we circulated around the room visiting friends, guests, and colleagues. I knew I would find him, or he would find me, but Doctor Oyster congratulated both of us before he asked about his program. I told him that my daughter, Delicious, found five flaws in the program, and we had someone else look at it, and he found seven.

Oyster roared, "Bullshit, the program is perfect as it is. We ran it through the computer three more times since we spoke to you, and it came out without a flaw."

"Are you going to use those thrusters on Orion?"

"You are not supposed to know about that."

"I just want to know how many people you are going to kill with them."

"You better not be pulling my joint Doctor Luck. We have spent $600 million working on these thrusters. They have to get those men to Mars and back, alive."

"If you leave them the way they are, those men won't make it to Mars, no less make it back. Would you like to meet the man who found the last two flaws in your program?"

"Yes I would, I have a few questions to ask him."

Gordon was holding court with his two little friends when I called him. He ran over to me and asked me if it was important, because he was busy. I told him it was extremely important. I had someone for him to meet. Reluctantly he said, "Okay."

I took him by the hand and brought him to Doctor Oyster. I lifted him and stood him on a chair. I introduced him to Oyster.

"Gordon, this is Doctor Oyster, the man in charge of the Milli-Newton Thrusters. He has some questions he'd like to ask you."

"Even, I don't believe you are trying to pull this gag on me. Let this kid go play with his friends and bring me the man who found the problem with my program."

Gordon said, "I am the man that found the seven problems with your program. Anyone with half a brain could have found them. Apparently you don't have half a brain."

It was not only me that laughed, but the collection of scientists that had gathered around us to listen to the eminent Doctor Oyster take apart the person who questioned his analysis of the thrusters. When it turned out to be a four-year-old boy, the crowd grew exponentially.

Doctor Oyster was not amused by Gordon's outburst, and began asking him questions about the thrusters.

Gordon's answers shocked him to his very core. When he got to the point of the errors in the computations Oyster had to sit down. Gordon listed them, point by point. He explained how each failure would cause a failure in other integral systems. Eventually, these systems would cause the failures of all three life-support systems on Orion. The results would be catastrophic, within 24 hours, and there was no way to fix them because his computations were all wrong.

Gordon received a round of applause from the scientists listening to his explanation of the complex problems associated with the thrusters. Doctor Oyster stood up and joined them. A four-year-old boy had seen problems that he and his entire staff did not see using the best computers and thousands of man-hours of work. He saved six people's lives, using his brain, and 90 minutes of Sequoia' s time.

Oyster looked at me and asked, "Can I borrow him for the next 60 years?"

"I'm sorry Doctor, but you can't have him. He is doing our spatial navigation program. We are building our own starship. We are funding it privately. My daughter is designing a new propulsion system that does not use hydrogen and oxygen to blast us into orbit. We will reach .999 the speed of light as soon as we leave our planetary system. Gordon will pick our destination. I will be doing the mechanical engineering along with Doctor Grayson Thyme. Our first organizational meeting is Monday evening, and our timeframe is 10 years."

"Even it can't be done. 10 years is no time at all. We have been working on getting out of our atmosphere without using hydrogen for decades. We haven't even got close to an answer to that problem yet. How does your daughter anticipate doing that in 10 years?"

"She was going to explain it to me but I asked her not to, because it was too complex. She is an absolute wizard when it comes to that area of science. She scares me at times. So does this little man standing next to me. Four years old, I can't wait to see what happens when reaches eight years old."

"Are we finished dad?"

"I'm sorry Gordon, yes were finished you can go back to your girls."

He jumped off the chair, and was off like a shot. We all laughed.

"What's so funny Even?"

"I told my daughter a few days ago not to have any sex manuals in the house because of him. I told her if he reads them any woman, single or married, West of the Mississippi was in trouble. He's only four years old, and look at him go."

Oyster looked, and saw Gordon with the two pretty young girls.

"One of those girls is six years old. He asked me if she is too old for him."

"Even, after what that boy just did to me tonight, I would believe anything you said about him."

"I have all the discs ready for you to take back to California. Stop by the house, at a reasonably late hour tomorrow. I'll give it to you."

"What time is your organizational meeting?"

"7 o'clock or 7:30 PM, as soon as we finished eating dinner."

" Am I invited to dinner; I'd like to sit in on your meeting."

"You can consider yourself invited for dinner. Please be at the house any time after 3 PM. I'll introduce you to Sequoia, and my daughter, if she's available."

"Will you be able to walk?"

"I certainly hope so."

As many of my colleagues returned to their tables, two eminent physicists, and a propulsion expert asked for invitations to dinner. They wanted to join us at our organizational meeting, also. I extended invitations to them without delay. Delicious predicted this would happen, but I never expected it to happen so soon.

************

As the waiters started bringing out the appetizers, I leaned across my bride, and began talking to Roz. I wasn't saying anything of great importance, it was just a distraction. I took the single edge razor blade out of my pocket, and carefully cut the seam down the side of my brides wedding dress about 18 inches long. I slipped the razor blade back into my pocket and finished talking to my best friend's wife. I never said a thing.

Moments later, Jennifer said, "Oh crap, I ripped my dress. Roz stood up to take a look at what happened. I stood up to get out of the way. Sure enough there was a ripped seam underneath her left arm.

"Jennifer this can't be repaired with a simple needle and thread. This tear is almost 2 feet long."

I said, "Let me call the front desk and see if they have a tailor in the building."

Of course they did, I paid them to have her here. I also had a room reserved for us to wait in while the dress was being repaired.

I returned to Jennifer and said, "We are in luck. The tailor was just about to go home, but the manager was able to stop her. She is waiting for us downstairs to see if she can help you with the dress. Tell your grandmother where were going, and we will be back as soon as the gown is fixed."

Jennifer showed her grandmother the gown, and she was horrified. She wanted to go with her granddaughter, but Jennifer said no.

"Enjoy the party, and I will be back as soon as possible."

I took her arm and we went to the elevator. We went down one floor, and Jennifer looked at me.

"What did you do?"

"The hotel said to go to this room and the tailor would take your dress from here and fix it. Why are you accusing me of having an ulterior motive?"

"I'm sorry I just thought that you did something underhanded."

She just finished saying it as the tailor stepped out of the elevator and walked towards us. She said to Jennifer, "You must get out of the gown. You don't want to miss your entire wedding event."

I used the magnetic key and opened the door to the bridal suite.

"You lying son of a bitch."

"I keep telling you I know both my parents. Now do you want to get undressed, and play house, while your dress is repaired, or do you want to argue?"

"Help me with these God damn buttons."

She was out of her dress in two minutes, and the seamstress was out of the room seconds later. She looked wonderful in white, what there was of it anyhow. A white demi-bra, panty's that did not deserve the name, but probably cost a fortune, suspenders, white silk stockings, and tiny white shoes, with stiletto heels.

She screamed, "Why are you still dressed?"

"I was admiring the view. There is nothing more lovely in this world than what I am looking at."

"Thank you, now get undressed."

I was down to my skin, in less than a minute. I didn't see any reason for half measures.

"Even how could you possibly go all your life, with equipment like that, and not want to use it?"

"No one interested me enough to drive me away from my science. I loved my work and my sister. No one came up to either standard. No one, until I met you. I told you that you set me free of all my past burdens. Divine was one of them. Now do you want to continue talking or would you like me to make love to you for an hour or so?"

"You can undress me anytime you want, anywhere you want. I love you as much as you love me. I love that you love my son as if he was your own."

As I caressed her, I said, "When Rod finishes with Gordon's biological father, he will wish he was never born. Gordon is my son, never doubt that."

I took Jennifer in my arms, and relieved her of her bra. As I moved down her body, I licked and sucked on both of her nipples. She grabbed my hair and moaned in contentment. I kissed her cute little belly button, the swell of her belly, and ripped the panty's from her body. She moaned again, but did not complain about the loss of her undergarment. She was shaved clean as a baby's bottom. I kissed the top of her Mons. She was dripping already, as I spread the lips of her vagina. Her pearl was out from under its hood seeking attention.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 08







There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 08



"What's the matter with my shape?"

"The outside is positively perfect; it's the inside I will change."

"I'm beginning not to like you."

"I believe I'm very good company. I hear you say that to your father a lot. I believe you even said that to Gordon."

"Isn't that little runt wonderful?"

"I don't want to talk about that little runt now. I want to know where you were going."

"I was going to my room."

"You were not even going to wait for me to answer you?"

"I thought you already did."

"No I just made a statement that said it would be extremely hard. I did not say it would be impossible. How many people have told us that building a starship is impossible, since the first day we mentioned it? How many more people will tell us it's impossible, until the day we leave the Earth's atmosphere and begin our journey to the stars? It's going to be very hard to do, but I will do it. However, you have to do one thing for me in return."

Hope was in her heart and in her mind when she uttered that word. "ANYTHING."

"Did I just hear you say the word 'ANYTHING?"

"Oh God I hate myself. Yes, I used that word."

"You have to move in with me."

"No, we are just asking for trouble if I do that Gray, and you know it."

"You set the terms for our continued relationship. I asked for one thing in return. Is it a yes or is it a no? Remember you used the word 'ANYTHING.'"

"They should remove that fucking word from the dictionary."

"That will be $10 please."

"Don't you start with me Gray."

"I was just reminding you of the Honor Code. Now answer my question is it yes or no. Are you moving in with me, or not? Remember, I am giving up sex for 10 months and sleeping in the same bed with a woman I want as dearly as the air I breathe. Are you willing to take a chance on me keeping my promise to you?"

"YES. I think you're out of your mind, but I am out of my mind in love with you. I don't know how my dad did without sex for all those years. Maybe that is why he is as smart as he is. All we have to do is wait 10 months. I know we can do it, I'm positive we can. I can teach you how to play chess properly."

"I play an excellent game of chess, thank you."

"How much would you like to bet you can't beat me?"

"Name your terms."

"$10 for each piece we take off the board?"

"You could take 14 of my pieces off the board, and I could put you in checkmate. I would win the game, and you would win the money. Where is the sense in that?"

"Okay, 10 kisses for each piece taken off the board."

"Anywhere?"

"No not anywhere, especially not there. You would drive me insane."

"If Rod had made that statement, what would your reply have been?"

Delicious thought for a second, then frowned at Gray. "Don't even think about that. It would be your last night on this planet alive. You have to sleep sometime, and once your eyes closed, they would never open again."

"I was just saying what you might do to Rod. I didn't say I would do it to you. I am much too smart to do anything that crazy."

"Do you want to help move some of my clothes into your room?"

"You do realize this is permanent; there is no turning back from this point."

"I told you, 'UP TO 10 YEARS.' I can end it sooner, but it will not be one day longer. Everything is re-negotiable."

"Who is going to be our negotiator?"

"Don't you worry about it; I will pick someone who is fair, honest, and who is on my side all the time."

"And if I object to this negotiator?"

"According to the terms of our agreement you can't object, remember?"

"Can I see that in writing please?"

"I will write the contract up for you first thing in the morning. Now are we going to move my clothes, or am I sleeping in my room tonight?"

"Miss from this day forward you no longer have a room, and neither do I. We share a room."

"What do you wear to bed Gray?"

"Just my pajama bottoms, that's all. Why do you ask?"

"I sleep naked. I wanted to know how randy that instrument of yours was going to be during the night."

"You bitch."

"That will be $10 please."

"You did that for me on purpose."

"Yes, I know. It worked perfectly."

"I am going to spank that behind of yours, until it glows bright red."

"I will put a surgical knife in my dresser drawer. The day you spank me, will be the day you become a eunuch."

Gray grabbed her hand, pulled her into the house, and up the stairs. When they entered her room he threw her onto her bed. He jumped in the air and pounced on her. His moved his hands up and down her sides, while he kissed her.

"Gray don't do that I'm ticklish."

"Is that what your father was talking about this afternoon?"

She did not answer him.

He moved his hand again along her flanks and she tried desperately to move away from it.

"Are you going to tell me, or am I going to find out the easy way?"

"Please don't tickle me. I go completely out of control when I am tickled. It was the same for my mother. Only my dad knew it, and he kept the secret from everyone else. If Julius had known about my mother weakness, he would've killed her by using it, and had me as a puppet."

"I promise never to spank you. When you are bad I will tickle you instead."

"I am going to buy a Taser. The night you tickle me I am going to attach the probes to your testicles and pull the trigger. I will definitely light up your life."

Gray kissed Delicious again. When he was finished her lips were puffy. He said to her, "We are going to have so much fun together. I am going to torment you, you are going to torment me, and we are going to be so much in love with each other, we are going to laugh about it."

"While you are lying on top of me, my clothes are still in my closet. Unless you are the 'Sorcerer's Apprentice', they are not going to move by themselves."

"Okay, let's divide and conquer. You take your closet, I'll take your panty drawer, and I'll meet you in our room."

"I bet you thought that was funny? You are the one that wants me in our room. I'm not going unless some of my clothes are there. Think about that for a little while before you make your next decision."

"The things a man will do to get a woman into his bed. Okay, come on 'Shorty' let's go."

"Who the fuck are you calling shorty, I'm five feet seven inches tall."

"That's $20 you owe the pretzel jar. I called you 'Shorty'. I'm six feet three inches tall, and the top of your head barely reaches my chin. Be nice or I will have to teach you another lesson in manners."

"I'll stay in my room."

"Not after you said the word ANYTHING you're not."

"You cock sucking son of a bitch. You are going to hold that over my head for the next 10 months."

"You just took a quantum leap and are into the pretzel jar for $40; BE NICE DELICIOUS, don't make me spank you."

"You wait until tomorrow morning when I draw up the contract. You are not going to like it one bit. Your hands are going to shake when you sign it. If you touch one bit of forbidden flesh, your fingers go into a nutcracker and I am going to be holding it."

"Bitch, bitch, bitch."

Delicious laughed. "That will be $30 please."

"That little boy is going to be a millionaire before he starts investing in penny stocks."

Delicious threw an armload of her clothes from the closet into Grays' arms. "Hang them neatly; otherwise you will have to do it again."

"Is this what married life is going to be like?"

"Oh no, it's going to be much worse; I'll make sure of it."

"You have to remember, you still haven't met my mother. She is a very formidable woman."

"I'll bet you are her baby boy."

"How did you guess?"

"A 17-year-old high school dropout has his mother's pride and joy wrapped around her tiny finger. She is going to wonder for the rest of her life if she breast-fed you too long."

"Delicious, you are evil."

"You must have been talking to Rod. He started saying I was evil the day after we met. He was absolutely sure about it by the time we landed in Denver. When I convinced my dad, to get up at 10 AM rather than 1 PM. He was going to have Father McAuley perform an exorcism on him. He was sure I was the devil's daughter. Rod and I had a lot of fun together, before Rosalynn put an end to it. One day when we are sitting down with them, you will hear all the stories of the things we did to each other. It was crazy time."

"I'm surprised you two didn't kill each other."

"We knew it was all in fun."

"Did everyone else know?"

"No. Gray, I have to leave my father a note to tell him what's going on."

"Should I start running now?"

"No, you know how smart he is. He just told me to use my head and not my hormones. I think I've done just that. I want him to know I moved into your room so he doesn't panic when he sees my room is almost empty."

Delicious ran down to her father's den, and wrote him a note. "Dad, In order to give Jennifer and you more privacy I have moved in with Gray. My arrangement with Gray is fantastically unconventional. If we live through it going to the stars will be a piece of 'pie.' Thanks for taking the leash off. Your loving daughter, Delicious." (I'm still not talking to you!)

After 20 minutes of walking back and forth, and kissing when they passed each other, all the clothes Delicious wanted in 'their new room' were properly in place. Now, so were they. She was lying on her side facing away from him. He was lying on his side facing her. They had talked and jousted with one another for a long time. Silence sounded wonderful to both of them. They were spooning, with no molecules of air between them. Except for the intermittent kisses on her neck, and his hand rubbing her belly, they slept peacefully.

*********

The wedding affair was a huge success for Father McAuley, Jennifer, and me. All the wedding gifts were given to the church. Jennifer and I made a donation of six figures also. The church would be solvent for many years to come.

Jennifer begged me not to start in with her family, by bringing up the past. She had lived through it once, and she wanted it forgotten. I told her it was not fair to her, but if that was the way she wanted it, I would abide by her wishes, reluctantly.

Tomorrow night we would have to put the two leaves into our wooden table. A total of five of my colleagues had requested invitations to dinner. They wanted to sit in on the inaugural meeting to build our spacecraft, especially the part when Delicious would be speaking. If she found a way to leave Earth's atmosphere, without using hydrogen as a propellant, she would have solved a problem that had plagued every space agency in the world, since the United States first harnessed its power.

We were saying good night to Gordon, when someone tapped me on my shoulder. I knew we would be setting another place at the table for dinner tomorrow night.

"Hello Shelby, you can be at the house any time after 3 o'clock tomorrow afternoon. Our meeting starts between 7, and 7:30 PM."

"My father is pissed with you. You are supposed to notify us, before you start on something like this."

"How did you find out about it?"

"You pissed off Doctor Oyster. Your daughter missed her appointment with him. Oyster called to give him a piece of his mind. My father told him he could not afford to lose any more of his mind, because you found more problems with his Milli-Newton thrusters then you had previously. That's why he decided to attend your wedding."

"Were you here to see the look on his face when Gordon told him about the problems with his thrusters?"

"Yes, we have the whole affair on tape. Every table in the science section was miked, and we got some very interesting information from your colleagues. The word is out about you bending radio waves, and some scientists are working on it to try and beat your timeline. If you are ready for your tests I would move it up a little bit, and get to the patent office ASAP."

"I can do it any time. How soon are you available?"

"I can be here for the duration. Does Rod have the NDA's ready?"

"Let me ask him."

"Rod do you have the NDA's ready for the test we were talking about?"

"Yes, I have to show it to Delicious as we agreed."

"Bring it to the house tomorrow, around noon. Call me on my cell before you leave your house just in case she and Gray are still in bed."

"Even, you didn't just say, what you just said, did you say that?"

"I swear I am going to have to ask your wife to teach you the English language, again. Yes I did say what I said when I said what I said to you what I said. Did you understand that?"

"I thought that's what you said."

"I'm glad, because I have no idea what I just said except that my daughter and Gray are probably an item by now. They will be living together, until I can build them a house. Do you have any other questions Rod?"

"Even are you feeling all right? You've been acting strangely of late. I'm worried about you."

"I think I am having a fit of dementia. I believe I told you I was giving you a 50 percent cut in salary; am I correct?"

"Even you never looked better in your life. Let's forget this conversation ever took place. I'll be at your house tomorrow at noon with the NDA's. I hope you have a long and happy marriage. Should I bring Gordon with me?"

"Yes, that would be a very nice thing to do."

"Your wish is my command."

"Good, now get the fuck out of here."

As Rod walked away I said to Shelby, "I don't know what I would do without that man. I owe the dam pretzel jar $10."

"It certainly didn't sound like he was not expendable. What is a pretzel jar, and why do you owe it $10?"

"Rod and I are closer than identical twins Shelby. As far as the pretzel jar is concerned, it would take too long to explain. You'll see it tomorrow."

Jennifer asked, "Can I have my husband back please. I want to go home and get laid."

"Jennifer this is Shelby Meil, a very good friend from Austin Texas."

"It's a pleasure to meet you Shelby. Are you a scientist also?"

"No, I'm in the people business."

"You must be very busy, because there are an awful lot of people in this country."

"Yes I am busy, but I'm taking some time off to stay in the Denver area to watch some of your husband's programs come to life. Your husband is a very fine man and a brilliant scientist."

"It was the best airplane ride of my life. I got to Fairbanks on time, and I got a husband all in one."

"It was a very happy circumstance; especially the part where he walked 40 miles to get to your house after he backed an airplane into some trees. He told me it was all because of the story your father told you. On behalf of my father and me, we thank you for saving his life."

"I'm happy I saved his life also. I wouldn't be in this gown if he wasn't alive. Come with me Even, I'm horny."

"Goodbye Shelby, I'll see you tomorrow."

*************

Gray was awake for 15 minutes or so but did not want to awaken his sleeping beauty. He loved spooning with her. Their minds seemed made for one another, and their bodies meshed perfectly in bed.

His hand moved slowly across the lower part of her ribs under her blouse, as he touched her skin, where he had been holding her while they slept. It did not seem to bother her, until her eyes popped open and she screamed, "Stop that I'm ticklish there."

"I have been doing this for 15 minutes or more. Now you tell me it tickles?"

"It's not possible; anyone who touches me there drives me crazy. If you were touching me for that long I would be dead of hypoxia."

"Do you see where my hand is? I have been rubbing it up and down this side of your body since I woke up."

"Do it again, but if I tell you to stop, stop or I will go crazy."

He rubbed his hand at the same speed and with the same light touch as he was doing while she was asleep.

"Gray I should be screaming in pain and laughing like crazy right now. Why is your touch different than everyone else's?"

"Maybe because you realize I love you, and I want you for the rest of my life as my wife."

"10 years, not one day longer. After that we will renegotiate."

"I want children before we head out to the stars."

"What are we going to do with them, take them with us, or leave them with your parents and have them raise them?"

"Our children come with us. I would never let my mother raise another child; can't you see what she did to me?"

"Your parents made a beautiful baby."

"Your parents made a Delicious baby."

"Take your clothes off, I want to see what you look like."

"If I am going to be naked, so are you."

"No intercourse, no fucking, no getting laid, do you understand Gray?"

"You do not owe the pretzel jar $10 for that word, and yes I understand."

Moments later they were using their eyes to memorize each other's body.

Delicious said, "Get in bed, I want to touch you, I want to know what a man feels like."

Gray replied, "Remember the rules, because I may forget them."

"Don't worry, I won't. I will not make the same mistake my mother did."

"Are we going to do this one at a time, or together?"

"One at a time, and I go first. You have been with women before. I have never been with or touched a man in my life."

"There will be a certain part of me that will be out of control."

"I fully expected that, and I want to see what happens when it does."

"You may have to help me at the very end."

"You will have to help me, I don't know what to do."

"I will take you in hand and help you help me."

"Great, now, I have a final instruction for you."

"What is it? I'll do whatever you ask. You noticed I didn't say the word that begins in the letter 'A', and ends in the letter 'Y."

"Yes I noticed it. Here is your final instruction.' She whispered, 'BE QUIET, NOT ANOTHER WORD."

Gray was about to reply, and Delicious covered his mouth with hers. When she released him she reiterated, "NOT ANOTHER WORD."

Gray mouth the word, "BITCH."

Delicious smiled. "The honor code requires you to put $10 in the pretzel jar."

*************

"They left the lights on in the kitchen so we didn't have to walk into a dark house. Wasn't that nice of them?"

"They left the lights on so you could carry me over the threshold."

"Did I ever tell you about my bad back?"

"Do I have to tell you how far I am going to shove my foot up your ass if you don't carry me over the threshold?"

"That will be $10 please."

"Even the pretzel jar is going to be the death of you."

"I thought you said it was my jokes?"

"Yes those too. Now are you going to carry me over the threshold, or are you sleeping outside tonight?"

I smiled at my bride as I took the keys out of my pocket and dangled them before her sleepy eyes. She closed in on me, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed me.

"You may have the keys to the house, but I have you by your balls."

As soon as the words were out of her mouth she squeezed, and not gently.

"Is this a nice way to start our marriage?"

"Are you going to carry me over the threshold?"

"I never said I wasn't."

"You never said you were."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"If you let go of my balls I will carry you over the threshold."

"Even I'm going to take a picture of you from belly button to knees and post it online. I want to see how many hits we get when they see the size of that weapon you carry around."

"You have a dirty mind. Come over here so I carry you over your threshold."

"The threshold includes these three steps."

"That's right I forgot. Rod told me to put you on the right side if you were going to run the household. I put you on the right side and you are already running it."

I jumped off the porch and landed beside my bride, who was amazed at my dexterity. I handed her the keys, picked her up, and threw her over my shoulder.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 08



She screamed bloody murder.

"Even, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"That's $20, and I'm carrying you over the threshold."

"Not like this you moron."

I swatted her on her behind, this time with my left hand. It had more oomph behind it.

"Ouch! Even you are going to die tonight."

I pulled her off my shoulder and into my arms and reminded her of what I said to her grandmother. I kissed my bride and told her we were going to have a wonderfully long marriage, and if she kept this attitude up she was going to have beautifully pink backside. She bit my nose. I bit her lower lip. We kissed.

She opened the door and I closed it using my foot. I put in the codes for the electronic locks, and turned on the alarms while still carrying my lightweight bride. I turned on the lights for the stairwell and began climbing them towards our bedroom. When I saw the sign on my door I put Jennifer down to read it. I smiled and I showed it to her. She was about to say something to me when we heard a scream coming from Gray's bedroom.

"I'm cuming!"

We heard Delicious laugh. "Look at the mess you made."

We laughed.

Seconds later she opened the door, still looking back towards Gray. She walked down the hall towards the bathroom, "NAKED, and licking her fingers."

Jennifer asked, "IS IT DELICIOUS?"

She did not see us prior to those words, and when she looked she screamed, "OH SHIT!"

Seconds later Gray charged out of their bedroom 'NAKED.'

Jennifer asked, "WAS SHE DELICIOUS GRAY?"

Gray's reply was a little different than my daughters.'

"OH FUCK!"

I opened our bedroom door, and Jennifer walked in.

I said to my children, "Be safe, and have fun. Delicious, you look... DIVINE."

My daughter was in such a state of shock at seeing us standing by our bedroom door, she was frozen to the spot she was in. She had not moved 1 inch, or attempted to cover herself in modesty. When I closed my bedroom door she screamed again.

"I am a fucking idiot."

I laughed because I couldn't help myself. I opened the bedroom door.

"That will be $10 please."

"I am not talking to you ever again."

33. BREAKFAST

Gray said, "I'm hungry, let's go downstairs and have breakfast."

"I am never leaving this room. How am I going to look my father in the face? He's seen me naked in a room with a naked man."

"You told me he expected us to be together. What is the big deal?"

"He was not supposed to see us naked. How could I have been so stupid?"

"Let's go downstairs and get this over with. We will laugh at each other before the day is over. We have a big meeting tonight. Everyone wants to hear what you are going to say. Are you going to miss it?"

"I wouldn't miss that meeting for the world. I'm just going to put a blindfold on my father."

"Isn't that like King Solomon split babies in half?"

"Why do you have to be so logical, when I feel so stupid?"

"You are not stupid; you are one of the brightest people I have ever met. You are just embarrassed. Let's get this over with, NOW."

"Can I get dressed first?"

"Not getting dressed would be a very bad idea."

With the temperatures expected to reach the high 90s for the day, Delicious dressed in long slacks and a turtleneck shirt with long sleeves. The only skin that was showing was her head and hands. When Gray returned from showering and shaving, he looked at her and laughed.

"Baby, you have to be joking with me. Get out of those stupid clothes and put something more appropriate on."

"I don't want my father to look at me."

"Your father has seen everything you have. Put on shorts and a tank top, before I strip you, and do it myself."

"Okay. Do you have a preference?"

"You don't want to wear what I helped put away yesterday. That bikini was awesome."

"You are a pervert."

"You bet your ass I am. Your ass would be sticking out completely in that bikini, and I believe your front would almost be uncovered except for that tiny piece of fabric."

"I loved it when I bought it, but I was too shy to wear it."

"Get dressed, I smell food, and I am hungry."

"Oh hell, it's 9:30 AM, and he is awake."

"Let it go Princess, the quicker we can get downstairs, the quicker the laughing will be over with."

"Gray don't be so damn logical. I am going to wind up not talking to you either."

"Oh God, we're not even married, and I'm going to get the silent treatment."

"You may as well start making a list of the things that going to happen to you over the next 10 years, you may want to reconsider renewing our contract."

"Correct me if I am wrong, but don't Catholics marry for life?"

"Yes they do, but only while they are on this planet. We won't be here, and I can make up my own rules while we are in space."

"You have this all figured out don't you?"

"Why do you think I picked 10 years?"

"I believe I'm with Rod on this. I think you are the Devils Daughter." (Gray caught her right hand before it hits his face.)

"BEHAVE DELICIOUS BEFORE I SPANK YOU."

"Someone has to tell me why I fell in love with you? I could beat the crap out of 99% of the men my age in this country. I picked the one that can beat the crap out of me."

"Your mother taught you how to defend yourself against most men. I'm here to teach you to be an equal. We start running tomorrow morning at 5 AM. I'll start you off at 1 mile to see how you do. We will increase it by a mile every week. When we get to 5 miles we will start increasing your speed and not your distance. By the time I'm finished with you your inside will be as beautiful as your outside. I know what you're about to say to me, but you do not want to add money to Gordon's pretzel jar winnings. Hold your tongue or you will not be able to sit down."

Delicious' face turned bright red, but her mouth did not open, until she had her brain under control.

"I hate you Gray. I don't like you at all. If I had not used that word, I would be back in my room. I hate that word as much as I hate you. 10 years, I will make it feel like a lifetime for you. I will draw up a contract that will make your head spin in all three directions at one time. Read it carefully before you sign it. You may wish to be dead instead."

"I love you Delicious."

"Fuck off Gray."

"I knew I could get you. That will be $10 please."

Delicious screamed, opened the door to their room, and stalked out. She was halfway downstairs when she realized what she had done. Gray was one-step behind her, and she could not retreat.

"You bastard, you tricked me."

"Yes, but it got you out of our room."

Then the worst thing in the world happened to her. Her father came out of his bedroom and started down the stairs.

"Good morning everyone, did you sleep well?"

"Yes Even, we slept very well. How was your first night as a married man?"

"Extremely active; my wife knows tricks they don't put in books, and I have read many books. I can recommend some to you if you'd like."

Delicious yelled, "Dad, we have to talk."

"Daughter, according to your last remark, you are not talking to me for the rest of my life."

"I will let you know when that starts."

"Can I have 24 hours' notice?"

"It's early in the day dad, if you start pissing me off now, there will be no end to it."

"That will be $10 please."

"No Even, it will be $20. I got her first."

"I hate both of you." She jumped down the last few steps and marched into the kitchen to find Jennifer making breakfast.

"Can I help you with anything Jennifer?"

"Would you mind setting the table?"

"No, not at all, what are we having?"

"Bacon and cheese omelettes, home fries, and toast."

"Would you teach me how to make the omelettes? I make a mess of them every time I try."

"It's easy once you figure out how to do it. My grandmother had to show me the secret."

"Thanks; let me set the table."

As the four of them sat down to breakfast, it was incredibly silent until Jennifer started the conversation.

"You two listen to me. What happened last night was nothing to worry about. It may have been embarrassing, but that has passed. Let it go because it was not as embarrassing as what happened to me when I was in college. I have told Even everything about my past so he will not be shocked by what I am about to tell you. I was in my dorm room having sex with some guy. He had me up against a wall, and I had my legs around his waist. In walks my roommate and she sees us going at it. She apologizes, and says she has to get her English book. She picked it up and charged out of the room. He never missed a stroke. I was as red as a beat. She called me later to make sure he was gone. I gave her the all clear, and when she walked back into the room we couldn't look at one another for the longest time. Then we started to laugh. We couldn't stop laughing. It became the main topic of conversation, every time she stuck her head in the door."

Everyone at the table erupted into laughter. The ice was broken, and the conversation began to flow freely.

I asked, "Would you care to explain about your 'fantastically unconventional arrangement' with Gray."

"Gray do you want to handle this or are you going to leave it to me?"

"I'll take it if you want?"

"Yes please."

"Delicious and I have an arrangement. If I ever beat her in a game of chess..."

"Not that one you asshole!"

"Even she is so easy. That will be $30 please."

"Remember Gray, the contract says 'Up To' and only I can change it."

"Don't ever negotiate with her; she will not leave you with your fingernails. Our arrangement is 'We will not have intercourse until she turns 18 years old, we are married, and she has your blessing."

"I guess that ends your arrangement. I will never give you two my blessing."

My daughter screamed at me so loud my ears hurt.

"You took the leash off. You told me I could do anything I wanted to do. You told me to think with my head instead of my hormones. I did exactly what you told me to do, and now you're telling me I can't do it. WHY?"

"Dammit, not even one. I was sure I could get one out of her."

Gray started to laugh. "Don't tell me you told her that because you wanted another $10. You nearly caused her to have a stroke. Look at her, her blood pressure is probably setting a new record right now."

Ice water was poured on my head by my new bride.

"Dr. Luck, if you ever pull a stunt like that on your daughter again, I will squeeze your balls every night until you scream in pain. Of course that will happen after you fuck me into submission, as you did last night."

"That's too much information Jennifer. I preferred it when my father was celibate."

"If your father was not such a brilliant scientist, he could have been the greatest porn star in the business."

"That is much too much information. My mother never mentioned that in her diary."

"Your father was only 17. He was a growing boy. Boy did that part of the boy grow into a man sized man."

"Darling, you are telling tales out of school. That is not a nice thing to do, even if it's true."

"Dad stop it. Everyone at dinner tonight is going to think I have been out in the sun too long."

"Speaking about dinner tonight, I think we will have it catered instead of you two cooking all day. Does anyone have any ideas for our evening meal?"

Jennifer immediately said, "I want my prawns."

"Then you shall have them. I shall place a pot on your side of the bed for when you get ill."

"I hate you Even Luck."

"That makes two of us Jen. How about you Gray?"

"Oh no, I'm not getting in the middle of this. I'll go for a run first."

"Chicken shit."

"Is that 40 or $50 Even?"

"It's only $40, because she didn't bite at my disapproval of your wedding. I'm so disappointed in that. I was sure I could get $10 out of her."

"I've really hate you dad. I don't think there's anyone in the world I could hate more."

"There is one person you could possibly hate more than me; your sister."

"No shit, I have a sister?"

"I got her. I knew I could get $10 out of her before this morning was over."

"Jennifer when he signs all the paperwork over to you, I am going to kill him. You are going to be the richest widow in the world. I don't care if I go to jail for the rest of my life, but I am going to kill him."

"Who is going to design and help build your StarCraft if he is dead? I know Gray is very good, because your dad has told me so. However, your father is a genius, and you know it. You may know how to get the craft out of the atmosphere, and up to near light speed, but who is going to build the craft around it."

"Why is everyone around me so logical this morning? First it's Gray, now it's Jennifer. I can't wait until I speak with Patti Valentino, and she tells me I can't kill him either. This is beginning to be the worst day of my life."

Jennifer walked around the table and held Delicious. "Think about it this way, when your father is finished building your craft and you are in outer space, he is of no further use to you. You can put him in with the refuse and stick him outside the craft. You will make him a human popsicle in less than one hundredth of the second. He will never know what hit him."

"I love you Jennifer that is a brilliant idea."

"I guess that allows me to live at least 10 more years. If the timing is right, that gives me time to have more children than Rod. All my goals in life will have been reached."

"What do I look like a baby factory?"

"No, you look like a Roman Catholic. No birth control is allowed in our religion, remember?"

"I think I'll become Presbyterian, or Anglican, or Episcopalian, or anything else that allows birth control."

"The Pope will excommunicate you, but that's not the worst part for you my dear. I will tell your grandmother on you."

"Oh fuck, she will kill me."

Everyone at the table laughed. I asked, "Who wants to tell her?"

Delicious said, "Since everything is going to Gordon, I guess I will. That wonderful word that indicates sexual coupling just cost you $10."

"Shit!"

"Gray, I believe it's your turn."

"Jen you are now up to $20."

"I'm moving back to my house, it's not as expensive as living in this one."

"It's all for a good cause. Gordon is going to be wealthier then you are after you receive your inheritance. He may be as wealthy as I am, within the next few years. I can see his face plastered all over the Wall Street Journal, Bloomberg, and Forbes. 'Who is this Wunderkind that is taking Wall Street by storm?"

"I have moved up the timeline for the radio tests to a week from Wednesday. Everyone including my wife will make phone calls from a script I have written. Do not deviate from it. If they ask for more details, tell them there is none. Their answer is expected by the deadline or they will be eliminated from the list.

Dr. Even Luck will be displaying a fully operational new technology which will change all communications systems worldwide. If you wish to attend you will sign a NON-DISCLOSURE AGREEMENT, before seeing the test. The parameters of the test will be explained to you at the non-disclosed test site. You have 30 minutes to respond to this message, or your company will be removed from the list and given to the next company in line. The test is next Wednesday at 12 PM Mountain time. Only the CEO or chairman of the company and two technical experts may attend; three members in total. You must be at my residence in Idaho Springs Colorado by 9 AM Mountain Time. Transportation will be provided, from your hotels, by the City of Denver Police Department. End of message. Doctor Even Luck

I have given each of you a list of phone calls to make to very important people. Do not speak to secretaries or in betweens. If they say this person is in a meeting or unavailable, explain to them their company will be removed from a select list of first call companies for a highly sophisticated new technology made by Dr. Even Luck in 30 minutes. Say thank you and hang up. You should get a call back within 10 minutes or less. They will beg you not to take them off the list. Don't be easy on them, make them beg.

"Jennifer I gave you the easiest phone calls, because you are new at this. However you do have business experience."

"Thank you Even, I'm shaking in my shoes just thinking about this."

"I have their names and phone numbers and everything written down for you. I will give you those later. Harold Chase is a very low-key man, but as brilliant as any computer expert I have ever met. He is also a billionaire, and one of the two people who are helping clean up our atmosphere. I'm not sure if he will be interested, but play to his computer expertise. Do not mention his money, just that we would like him to be here to witness the test. The other two will crawl on their knees to get here. NASA, you will call their offices in Washington and speak to the Administrator himself. Bolden is an idiot."

Gray nearly split his sides laughing, as he fell off his chair.

"He is a typical bureaucrat. He has his nose so far up his own ass he can't see daylight. You don't want him to come to the test but you have to speak to him anyhow. Flatter him, but you want the best technical experts he has to witness the tests. I want him to know that what I have done is for real, and not science fiction."

"This next one will start a fistfight in the Pentagon. You have to call the Secretary of Defense and speak to him directly. I know him personally, so that will be an easy call for you. He's going to tell you that he hates me. Tell him he's in good company. Reiterate to him I want the best men he has, and I want them to bring the most advanced communications receiving equipment they have. I don't care what kind of transmitting equipment they bring, but the receiving equipment has to be top-of-the-line."

"Gray you get Space Exploration Technologies, General Electric, and ITT."

Delicious you get your wish. "I gave you Patti Valentino, Dycke Schneider, DuPont, and IBM."

"I'm taking Lockheed Martin, General Dynamics, Northrop Grumman, and Boeing. I should be off the phone in 20 minutes. If any of you have trouble, I will be available to help you."

"I believe I mentioned this to you before, but I will say it again. The test will be held at Republican Mountain. It is not the highest mountain in the area, but serves my purpose the best. We will be on the eastern side of it transmitting, and the receivers will be in the valley, on the western side and below our transmitters. It will be a severe test of my equipment, but it will work fine. I used it to transmit around a lead shield and it worked beautifully."

Gray asked, "How did you come up with the notion like this Even?"

"It was as easy as driving your car under a bridge. Every time you do you lose your signal. I got tired of it. When you're on a long trip, you have to listen to one radio station. It's normally some Bible thumper trying to convince you that the world was made some 7000 years ago. I want to take an 8000-year-old rock and shove it up his ass to prove that he's wrong. The problem is I can't find a rock that's only 8000 years old. They're all older than that."

"You could always go to Hawaii."

"I don't know how to scuba dive."

"I could teach you."

Delicious hit him. "Is there anything you don't know how to do?"

"If there is, I haven't met it yet." Gray got up from the table quickly and ran for his life. My daughter was after him but could not catch him. He ran through the kitchen, and hid behind the counter. Delicious came through and ran by him. He got up and followed behind her.

Delicious got frustrated and yelled, "God dammit Gray where are you?"

He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "$10 please."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 08



She nearly jumped out of her skin. "You cock sucking son of a bitch, don't you ever scare me like that again."

"I believe that's $30."

She jammed her foot down hard on his instep.

Gray howled like an injured wolf. As he calmed down, he looked at her with death in his eyes.

"Miss Luck, we are going shopping for the best running shoes made. No, we are going to buy four pair of the best running shoes made, because you are going to wear them out quickly. You are going to die running by my side. You are going to vomit like no one has ever vomited before, but I am not going to let up on you. You are going to run, until you think running is the only way to move. You are going to wish you had never met me. In the winter when there is so much snow on the ground and you cannot run outside, there will be a treadmill for you to run on. I will be on the treadmill next to you keeping pace. Hours and hours on end you will be on the treadmill. Then we will go to work on our spacecraft. After we finished working on the spacecraft we will go back on our treadmill and run for hours more. You will love running, and running, and running."

"DADDY HELP ME!"

"Daughter, if you remember correctly I told you never to hit that man ever again. I believe you hit him. I think he is rewarding you properly for the insult against his person."

"You also said you were going to treat me like I was a new baby for the 17 years you missed helping me grow up. Make-believe I am a baby, protect me from him."

"You did not seem to need protection from him last night. You cannot have it both ways young lady."

"I hate myself, I really do. I really hate myself."

"Everyone to the phones, Rod gets here at noon with the NDA's. Delicious wanted to read them over to make sure nothing was left out. Eight eyes are better than two, so all of us may as well read them."

************

I was wrong; again, I was off the phone, after speaking with four CEOs in 15 minutes. They all wanted more information from me, but I said no. It was a yes or no proposition and they all said yes without reservation. They would all be in town Tuesday evening to make sure the weather did not delay them.

I went to Jennifer to see how she was doing, and as I expected, the idiot from NASA was causing a problem. Jennifer kept her cool and said to him, "You have no expertise in the area of radio transmissions. We need the top three experts in the area. You have wasted 29 minutes and 20 seconds of your allotted time. You now have 30 seconds remaining starting now to say yes or no, or your place will be given to another corporation. You now have 25 seconds, 15 seconds, five seconds goodbye.

"Alright you win, I thought you were bluffing.

"The next time Dr. Even Luck offers you the opportunity to watch one of his marvelous inventions come to life and you try this shit again, you will be out of a job. He has more friends in Congress then you do."

I kissed Jennifer's head. "You have some pair of balls Madam."

"Dr. Luck, you of all people should know I do not have balls."

"You are correct. I am thoroughly familiar with that area of your body, and I would have noticed by now if testicles were any place in sight. Has anyone else caused the problem?"

"You are correct about your friend at Department of Defense. He not only hates you now, he wants to put you in a submarine, and fire you out of a torpedo tube. He has four services and you are only allowing him three people. He said he is going to go out of his mind."

"Call him back and tell him he can send four."

Jennifer laughed. "He will probably want to kiss you on all four cheeks."

"Tell him he can't do that anymore, I'm married."

"He wouldn't believe that unless he saw the marriage certificate."

"Send him a copy of it, and the wedding photo. He still won't believe it. Who do you have left?"

"Harold Chase."

"Be very nice to him. Tell him we are calling Patti Valentino and Dycke Schneider to witness to test also. Maybe that will help him make up his mind to attend."

In less than an hour 14 of the 15 phone calls were made, and acknowledged affirmatively. I couldn't imagine why Delicious was still on the phone so I went to check on her. There she was lying on her bed laughing hysterically, while she was talking to Laura Valentino.

"Go away dad, Patti is coming with Laura, and her son or daughter. They are fighting over that slot now."

"Tell Patti she can bring them both. There is no sense starting a family feud. Did you make your other phone calls?"

"Yes dad, everyone's coming. Now go away please, I think Laura and I are going to be great friends."

"Please don't tell me she's a pain in the ass like you."

"No one is quite like me dad. Just look at my parents and you could guess that for yourself."

***********

I shook my head as I left her room knowing this was going to be a very long day. I still had much more work to do. I called the police commissioner in Denver and asked him for every off-duty police officer who wanted to work next Wednesday at $300 per hour, portal to portal. They had to wear full body armor and carry long-range rifles as well as their regular sidearms. I give him Rod's phone number, and I needed a head count by Monday.

I called our local sheriff and gave him the same opportunity for his off-duty officers. Since our police force is very small he answered yes for all six men who were off-duty that day.

My final phone call was to Dunbar Security. I wanted an armored car to carry my invention to the site, and another as a decoy. I told them I only wanted a driver, and he was to wear very specific clothing. I told them what I was worried about and to make sure the drivers were volunteers. Each driver had to be unmarried, with no dependents, and if possible, no living parents. He or she was going to be paid $100,000 for this trip, because of the feeling I had in my gut. They were to be told of my fears, in advance of making their decision. This was to be held in the strictest confidence.

The word was now out that this test was happening. My competitor's might not be happy with me moving up the test date. This was a multibillion-dollar prize. I knew it, and if I knew it, they knew it. If they were close enough to finding the same answer I did, they would stop at nothing to delay, or destroy my equipment. I was leaving nothing to chance.

Then my life was nearly destroyed; by a woman.

"You didn't invite me Even. WHY?"

I recognized her voice instantly, and I wanted to kick myself. How could I possibly have forgotten to invite her?

"I thought you would be too busy with your children to want to fly all the way here from Milan for the demonstration. I know you have close ties with Dycke Schneider and Patti Valentino. I thought they would keep you apprised of the situation."

"Nice try Even; how are they supposed to do that when they have to sign a NDA?"

"Do you know everything about everything that goes on in this world Celeste?"

"Did you call the chairman the Boeing today? That's funny so did I. He just happened to mention this little test that is happening next Wednesday. He was sure I was going to be there. I am invited, right Even?"

"Yes you are, and to show you how sorry I am for forgetting to invite you, I will let in on something brand-new. We are having our first meeting on tonight. A total of 13 people will know about it, and five live in my home. All the scientist will be sworn to absolute secrecy, under penalty of castration. If you can stay an extra day we will sit you down and explain everything that we are going to do, and how we intend to do it."

"This sounds very hush-hush, I like it. You should let Patti, Dycke, and Harold stay also."

"Did you speak to them already?"

"Of course I did."

"What did you do, have the girls dial the phones for you?"

"No, all my friends are on speed dial. I may have to take you off speed dial, because I'm wondering if you are still a friend."

"I have always told you in advance of the things that are coming down the line from me Celeste, so you could get in on the ground floor."

"Okay I will keep you on speed dial for now. Don't ever leave me out of the loop again Even."

"I would be out of my mind to do that Celeste."

"I have always thought you were out of your mind Even, that's why you are so brilliant. I will see you next Wednesday."

"Thank you for not killing me Celeste, because I just got married."

"I'm sorry I must've heard you wrong. Did you say you just got harried?"

"No Celeste, I just got MARRIED."

"The Doctor Even Luck I know doesn't speak to a woman. He looks at the floor and runs away. What happened to you in Alaska that changed you?"

"I met Jennifer on the way up to Alaska. I fell in love with her the moment I saw her. She fell in love with me at the same time. It was magic."

"I think that's wonderful Even. It is exactly what happened with Philip and me. I made it more dramatic by running away, but it was still love at first sight."

"I think my romance was more dramatic than yours. I had the pilot of my aircraft back into some trees just before we crashed. I built a rickshaw out of the wreckage of the plane, and walked 40 miles to the first house I saw to get help. When Jennifer opened that door there was no doubt in my mind we were destined to be together forever. I bought her a ring and proposed to her in a Wendy's, with her son standing beside me. If she didn't say yes, I would have kidnapped her, and lived in the forest with both of them, until she changed her mind."

"Even you are such a romantic. Couldn't you find someplace better to propose to her?"

"Her son, Gordon, wanted Wendy's for dinner. The ring was in my pocket, so why wait. I also have a daughter I never knew I had until a few days ago. I thought she was my niece. The lawyers in Maine, who were closing up my sister's affairs, found Divines' her diary. They called my lawyer here in Colorado. I have a 17-year-old daughter, and I didn't know. My sister never told me."

"You and your sister had a baby together?"

"It's not like that Celeste; when you get here I will explain it to you."

"You couldn't keep me away from this test with an armored tank division after that statement. I will fly in with my husband on Tuesday."

"Why don't you bring the dwarf with you?"

"If Antonia heard you call her that you would be dead."

"What did I say, I don't remember saying anything."

"Did I tell you I was taping this conversation?"

"Did I tell you this is not the real Even Luck, but his evil twin 'Bad Luck'."

"Even that was funny 11 years ago, it is no longer funny."

"I still like that joke. You made a fortune on all my patented ideas Celeste, because you always know what is about to happen before it happens. You have been first in line for everything, since we met at MIT."

"Yes I do. You are still making money from them, thanks my lawyers, and ME."

"We have a wonderful symbiotic relationship Celeste. Let's keep it working as it has in the past. I believe Tuesday I'm going to rattle your teeth."

"You know you can't do this to me Even. You have to give me a hint at what is going on in the brain of yours."

"All I'm going to tell you, and only you, is this idea is truly out of this world."

"Will I be able to make money from it?"

"Do you remember what you told me when we first met: To make money, you have to spend money. If you're willing to do that, I can guarantee you about 300 to 400 patents in the next five years. We have a 10-year timeline for completion of our new project. Everything we are going to do is cutting edge science. When we succeed, everyone is going to be clamoring to get a piece of what we know. Your holdings will start with the T instead of a B. You will be the richest person on the planet, and not by a little bit Celeste."

"Sometimes science is a bottomless pit."

"Every dollar I have is going into this project. Every dollar I make from the project I am displaying and patenting Wednesday will be going into it also. If you want in, you have to open your checkbook. More importantly, some of your businesses, and those of Dycke Schneider could be vital to the secrecy and success of our project."

"Even this project sounds like it is almost as fun as sex."

"Being new to the marvels of sex, I can only say I love it as much as I love science."

"I will see you next Wednesday Even; congratulations on your marriage."

34. LUNCH

Rod walked into the house carrying a box with the proposed nondisclosure agreements in it.

"Where is Gordon?"

"He is still at my house running around the backyard with my kids. He was having so much fun, I decided to leave him there. I will bring him back for dinner."

He handed the NDA's to each of us sitting at the table and we began going through it item by item. Gray, and Delicious each asked pertinent questions as he went through each item, and he explained how the law pertained to them. When he was through, everyone was satisfied.

"Delicious, you are not going to hit me with a chair or something?"

"I would love to Rod, but it would get both of us in trouble."

"I know I would get in trouble with Rosalynn, who would you be in trouble with?"

She twitched her head towards Gray, and said, "Him."

"It's not possible. Gray has you hogtied already?"

"Don't start with me Rod. It's been a lousy day so far, and you will only make it worse."

Rod looked at me and said, "Isn't love grand?"

He heard a chair scraping the floor and knew Delicious was getting ready to attack.

Just as suddenly he heard the word, "SIT."

He looked and saw Delicious sitting in her chair, with her hands folded in her lap, fuming.

"Remember Gray I have not written up our contract yet, and when I do you will be very sorry you did this to me."

"Baby all I have to say to you is one word. I want you to remember it every day for the next 10 years 'RUN.' For every insult you place upon me, you will put your running shoes on, and we will 'RUN.' I have been running since I was five years old, and I have the medals and trophies to prove it. You will love the outdoors. You will love the sound of your feet hitting the pavement. You will love the sound of your breakfast hitting the pavement as we pass the 10-mile mark on our way to the end of a marathon. I will not leave you behind, you will finish every step of the 26 miles 400 yards. If it takes you two days to finish it, you will have run every step."

"DADDY!" Delicious sprung out of her seat, ran up the stairs, into their bedroom, and slammed the door closed behind her.

"Gray, I think you scared the crap out of my daughter."

"I believe it was you who told me to confuse her Even. I believe I'm succeeding."

"Gray I want you to call 'Executive Air' for an 1 AM Departure Friday morning to Reagan National for two people. Give them your name and the second person will be named later. The aircraft is to wait for you to bring you back. If they need two flight crews to do it, tell them to do it. If anyone asks the reason for your trip, you're going to NASA headquarters for a meeting. If anyone checks, you will check out perfectly."

"Rod I want my invention patented, Friday morning, as soon as the office opens. I have a feeling deep in my bones someone is going to try something evil Wednesday and I want to protect myself against them. I want you two gone and back before anyone notices anything is out of the ordinary. I will pick you up at the airport, with Delicious. You can buy my baby her running shoes as soon as you get back. I will come home with Rod. I do not want to be in the car with you two. It will be freezing in the car, and the air conditioner will not be turned on."

"I like the last part of your statement Even, but who do you think is going to do the nasty stuff?"

"I don't know, but I'm sure Shelby is looking into it. Do not tell my daughter what is happening, until the last minute please. She will demand to go with you. She is not going if I have to tie her to your bed."

"That is a good idea Even. She tends to be a little dramatic at times."

"Gray I think you should go upstairs now and play nice with my little girl."

"I like playing nice with your little girl."

"No tales out of school please, her father could get upset with you."

Gray knocked on his door and without asking walked in.

"Who gave you permission to walk into this room?"

"I don't need your permission to walk into my room."

"I can change that in a hurry."

"May I ask you something?"

"Yes you may, before I kick your ass out of here."

"First we both know you can't kick my ass anywhere. Second are you the young woman that said the word, "ANYTHING."

"Why don't you just shoot me and get it over with. I said that word in a moment of weakness, in a moment of hope. I'll go into town buy a gun, and put it in your hand. I will hold it against my head and pull the fucking trigger for you."

"If that's what you really feel like, and what you really want, I'll leave for Houston this evening, and you will never have to see me again." He turned, closed the door, and started walking towards the steps."

She threw the pillow at the door as he closed it. "You wouldn't do that to me. You wouldn't leave me. You love me as much as I love you."

He didn't answer, he walked down stairs and went outside for a breath of air.

Seconds later delicious flew down the stairs after him. "Dad where is he?"

"Considering what I heard you tell him, anywhere away from you is where he would want to be. Someone in this house has got to learn to grow up in a hurry or she is going to lose everything she ever wanted. That is if she ever really wanted it in the first place."

"What do you want from me; dad? I told him this is the first time I have fallen in love. I told him I didn't know how to control myself with a man. Everything with me has always been on the offense; attack, attack, attack. That's what mom taught me. That's how I defended myself from being hurt.

It hasn't been four months since mom died and my whole world has been turned upside down. I've been allowed to think for myself, do for myself, and even dream for myself. I've never been allowed to do those things before. It's like being released from prison. Every day you were told what to do, how to do it, and when to do it.

Now you can do anything you want to do, anytime you want to do it, or you can put it off until tomorrow if you want to. I don't want him to leave dad; should I beg him to stay."

"Rod do you want to play gin or poker?"

"I was hoping we could play a game of hearts."

"You two deserve each other. You're both dimwits."

Jennifer opened the front door carrying wine for this evening's meal. She bumped into Delicious and asked, "Why is Gray running like a bandit trying to escape from the police Delicious? What did you do?"

"Why is it me? Why couldn't it have been him?"

"Would you like a list, or the short answer."

"How short is the short answer?"

"One sentence long."

"Go ahead, I'm ready."

"I am a woman, and I see guilt ridden all over your face."

"God dammit."

"That will be $10 please."

Delicious was about to scream her response, when Jennifer placed her hand over her mouth.

"Don't you humor them, or make my son and a richer than he's going to be. Go upstairs, change your clothes, put sneakers on, and go running after Gray."

"But..."

"Move your ass, now."

"That will be $10 Jennifer."

"You are not getting laid tonight."

"I'll put the money in the pretzel jar for you."

"I think that's a wonderful idea."

A few moments later, Delicious ran out the front door, wearing her pink shorts, crop top, and sneakers. She knew most people started running clockwise, so she started running counterclockwise in hopes she would see Gray coming from the opposite direction.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 08



As she passed her mother's grave she said, "I'll stop by later mom. I have to find my future."

She ran the entire perimeter of the fenced in property and never saw him. She decided it must have happened when she ran in front of the granite monolith by her mother's grave and decided to do it one more time. Without slowing down a step she continued her quest to find Gray, and apologize.

She passed the house again and didn't see him. She decided he must have seen her coming and he decided to hide from her. She started her third trip around the property looking more closely at the bushes that lined the fenced in area.

The only part of the property she did not run through was the rocky area by the Hot Spring. As Gray was exiting that area he saw her running. Her style was awful. She ran like a mix master on steroids. She was all knees, arm, elbows, and heels. He fell in behind her by 20 yards so she could not hear him; or at least he thought so.

"Dr. Grayson Thyme if you try to scare me again, I will cut your heart out while you're sleeping."

"You can't cut my heart out any more than you already did. I'm leaving for Houston tonight remember?"

"I will drive you to the airport as soon as you get out of the hospital."

"Why would I be in the hospital?" He ran up alongside her, but stayed far to her left.

"Because I will break both your legs to keep you from leaving me. I told you this was the first time I have ever been in love. I told you I did not know how to be with a man, and not be afraid of him. You scared me, and I reverted to who I was, not who I want to be. You have to give me time to grow up, or you might as well leave before I hurt you anymore then I have already."

"Do you want to come to Houston with me?"

"Never, I have work to do here. They will never let me work on what I want to do. They will tell me what to do, and I won't do it."

"I'm sorry, I have to go back next week after the test. I'm going to miss you."

"Why didn't you tell me this before? Why did you let me fall in love with you if you weren't going to stay?"

"It is all a matter of priorities. I have worked on Orion for three years. My life's work is in that capsule. I was hoping I could convince you to come with me so I could turn in my paperwork to leave the agency."

"You son of a bitch. I thought you were leaving me."

She started chasing after him.

Gray tormented her by running faster than she was 'BACKWARD'. All the while he was telling her how to change her running style.

"Run on your toes, not on your heels. Lean forward, it will give you less wind resistance. Bring your knees in, it looks like you're getting ready to get laid."

"Fuck you Gray."

"Not until we are married."

"You may not live that long."

"You are in better shape than I thought you were. I thought you were powder puff on the inside. Is this your first time around?"

" Asshole, this is my third time around."

"That's wonderful, we can start at two miles instead of one. I will get you out of bed at 5 o'clock in the morning."

I am going to tie your balls with a string. If you dare wake me up at that hour of the morning, I will hear you scream, and smile as I fall back to sleep."

"I will pinch your nipples until you cry out in anguish. You will get up, and we will start running at 5:30 in the morning."

"Why can't we start at 7 o'clock in the morning."

"We start at 5:30 to get used to the time. As we get used to the short miles, and increase them in length we will be getting back here by 8 o'clock in the morning. You will shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, and go to work at 9 AM. Whenever we finish, we will go for another run, eat dinner, shower, fall into bed feeling wonderful."

"You are a sadist."

"Yes, I know, and you will love it, just as I do." He stopped and let her run into his arms.

He kissed her. "You owe the pretzel jar $30 for the use of foul language Delicious. You must learn to control your mouth. There are a many very intelligent people you are going to work with, and they do not accept that type of language used around them. I am not going to spank you, tickle you, or make you put money in the pretzel jar. I just want you to try harder to keep your mouth under control."

All 5'7" of Delicious Luck jumped up into the arms of 6'3" of Dr. Grayson Thyme. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and legs around his waist, and kissed him until they were both out of breath.

"I've been to Austin Texas, but never to Houston Texas. Are we driving or flying?"

"I'm going to rent an airplane and fly back."

"Remember what happened to my father when he was in an airplane the last time?"

"Do you know how many deaths are caused by automobile accidents every day?"

"I stand corrected. Single engine, multi-engine, propeller, or jet aircraft?"

"Which one would you prefer; I can fly them all."

"I hate you Gray I bet if they promised you a seat on Orion to Mars, you would stay with NASA."

"No I wouldn't. The people at NASA lie through both sides of their mouth. They will do anything to keep people there. They don't want to lose their brain trust. The reason scientists stay with them is the science, not what they get paid. They could get triple what they are paid on the outside, but the funding is always short. As I told you and your father, Orion is three years behind schedule, and we have no way to get it into Mars orbit. The agency doesn't care. They just keep throwing money at us so we can keep building it. They promise that the rocket will be here. The contracts haven't been let out yet, and that is a six or seven year project. Orion will be finished and sitting in a clean room waiting for this new technology, hoping that it works."

"I could give them the technology but that would ruin everything we have planned for the StarCraft. Maybe I will donate it to the University of Chicago with a provision every penny NASA saves be used for education and research."

"Why the University of Chicago?"

"They had the answer and they didn't realize it. I did. They believed Newton could not be wrong. They did not believe gravity could be reversed. They went in the wrong direction. How many scientists have taken the easy way out, instead of the hard way, and come out with the wrong answer in the end. In the 1890s everyone thought Thomas Edison was the most brilliant scientist on the face of the earth. Compared to Nicholas Telsa, Edison was an idiot. It was the men around Edison who were the true geniuses, not him. Thomas Edison's claim to fame on his light bulb was the screw-in bottom. That's the only part he came up with himself. The filament was the hard part, and he had no hand in making it. Edison said, "Direct Current was the only way to keep electricity safe. He was full of shit and his backers lost tons of money because Telsa proved him wrong.

Telsa rewrote the entire book from alternating current to the tilt rotor aircraft, which was not even believed possible until the late 20th century. He was first to experiment with high-frequency radio waves to detect submarines, and radar to detect aircraft. His list of patents are like reading the future. He was absolutely unbelievable for his time."

"Someone has been reading history books."

"Science books dummy, science; if you want to know about the future, you have to know about the past. Read H.G. Wells, and you see the future."

"I think I'll keep you for a little while longer."

"How little is a little while?"

"The rest of my life if you let me."

"10 years, and then we will renegotiate."

"Since I am letting you write the first contract, I get to write the second one."

"Only if I get to approve it."

"Do I get to approve the first one?"

"Absolutely not, the first one is as is."

"So is the second one."

"I hope I am in stasis by then."

"The contract only is in force while we are awake. I will put that in writing also."

"I should have kept my mouth shut."

"I will buy you new sneakers Friday, so they taste better."

"Let's go inside, I have to start writing our contract. It may take me a month to finish it."

"That's a wonderful idea. As soon as you finish yours, it will give me 10 years to write mine in response. Your contract will be quick and evil. My contract will be long, thoughtful, and responsive to every word in yours."

"I've already told you that you are a sadist. I have also told you many times that I don't like you. You're only saving grace is that I love you too much to let you go. Are there any foods you don't like to eat, because if there are I will serve them to you every day."

"As long as they are on your plate also, I will eat anything you put in front of me. Calves brains, Rocky Mountain oysters, the lining of the cows stomach, liver, haggis, goat's eyes, you name it, and I will eat it."

"You are disgusting Gray. I haven't heard of half of those things, and I don't think I want to know what they are."

"In that case I will make them for you."

"I will run away from home first."

"If you remember, you came running after me, because you did not want to lose me."

"You really know how to hurt a girl don't."

"I also know how to love a girl with all my heart."

"I wonder if they can put us in the same stasis chamber?"

"How do you know it's going to be a chamber?"

"I see it in the movies all the time."

"If I am on the inside, watch out; I'm going to be throwing up green stuff all over you."

"How do you know it's green?"

"I see that the movies all the time."

"Do you believe everything you see in the movies?"

"Do you?"

"It's 1:30 PM, our guests are supposed to arrive a little after 3 PM. Do you want to go home and fool around a little bit?"

"I'll give you a 10 second head start. You better move your ass baby."

"That will be $10 please." She was off, sprinting towards the house.

Gray counted down from 10 to zero, and took off after her.

Delicious was less than 5 yards from the front steps when Gray passed her running at full speed. He jumped up onto the porch and did his 'Rocky' imitation.

"Not one word Gray, if you say anything I will shove my fist up your ass."

"Delicious what did I say about your mouth?"

"I am going to have to wrap my head around it. I am going to try very hard to stop that; I promise Gray, I really do."

"Let's go upstairs, and fool around. I will take it out in trade."

"I bet you will try."

Gray grabbed Delicious' hand and pulled her into the house. As they started up the stairs she yelled, "Hi everyone, goodbye everyone, we will be down later."

I said, "It looks like everything is okay in paradise now. I think you are going to be very useful in this house Jen. She listens to a woman much more easily than she does to a man."

"That's because all men are idiots when it comes to a woman's heart. If men weren't taught the difference between breasts, assholes, mouths' and pussy's, there would never be any children born."

Rod said, "You do not have a very high opinion of men, do you."

"Even said you were the brightest lawyer he ever knew. You have just proved him correct."

"I think you should go home and talk to Rosalynn about your use of language Rod. I believe my wife may be more than your equal in it. If those two get together, you and I are going to need a safe room to hide in."

"Maybe we were all better off before you got married?"

"No, I have never been happier since the day I met Jennifer."

"Do you see what I mean Rod. Sometimes a very good husband comes up with an excellent, pre-recorded answer to a very delicate question."

"Wife it was not a pre-recorded answer. It was a truthful answer. I love you as much as I love my science, but there is one thing my science cannot give me. I have grown to love your pussy, your breasts, your firm and delicate ass, your loving thighs, your neck, ears, and lips. My computer cannot give me the children we desire to have together, all 10 of them. Quadruplets, triplets, twins, and finally a single birth. We will hit for the baseball cycle. We will have more children than my friend Rod before we leave the earth's atmosphere on our way to the stars. These are the things my computer cannot give me, and only a loving and devoted wife can. It is not science, and it is not technology. It is pure unadulterated SEX."

"In a pig's ear Even. We will do this one at a time, or we won't do it at all."

"My darling wife, love of my life, future mother of my children, since when do we mere mortals have a choice in this matter? Only God can dictate how many children we will have at one time, or if we will have any children at all."

"Nice save Even, hiding behind God's skirts was a good move."

Rod said, "God is a man, he doesn't wear skirts."

"Look at all the pictures they make of him. Either he's a cross-dresser, or he's wearing a dress all the time."

"Be quiet Rod, before you get in over your head. If Jen talks to Roz you may never have sex, in any form, ever again."

"I think I'll go home and get Gordon, before I wind up on the table as part of dinner."

"Take the NDA's with you, make up 200 copies in binders, and keep them in sealed boxes. We are going to need a notary for Wednesday. Get two of them locally, not from Denver."

Rod almost ran out of the house, fearing for his sex life.

35. A ROOM FULL OF DOCTORS

By 3:30 PM all my colleagues were seated in my living room discussing everything but the topic they wanted to discuss most, which was what Delicious would brief them on at 7:30 this evening. These men, women, and I had crossed paths many times over the years, at conferences, and society functions, but never had anything like this. Most scientists are a homely bunch. When they leave work, they go home to their families, and then retire to their home offices and start to work again. Their minds never turn off. It is an occupational hazard.

At 4:15 PM, my four-year-old dynamo charged into the house.

"Mom, dad, I'm home."

Jennifer greeted him in the kitchen with a kiss. "What did you fall into Gordon? You smell awful."

"I fell into the compost pile. I think I need a bath."

"Get in here Even, you have a job to perform."

"Ladies, gentlemen, if you'll excuse me I think my son requires my special attention. If you need anything, Delicious or Jennifer will be happy to assist you."

I walked into the kitchen and looked at my son. "Oh goodness my handsome son has returned."

"Mommy says I stink, because I fell in the compost pile."

"Yes my son that would do it. Let's get you into the shower and clean clothes. There are people here that want to meet you, and I want you to meet."

"Piggyback ride?"

"Come on mommy hoist him up."

"I would have to touch him."

"Use towels Jen."

"Here we go Gordon, it looks like a shower for the both of us."

"Dad did you ever find out where mommy's mole was?"

"Don't you answer that question."

"Aren't mommy's funny Gordon?"

"I think so. So what if she has a mole on her behind."

"I couldn't agree with you more Gordon, but women are funny that way. They like to keep secrets from men, and we have to humor them."

**********

"Keep the towel wrapped around you tight so you don't get cold. I'll take some clean clothes out of your suitcase."

"Can I jump on the bed while I wait?"

"Are you going to fall off the side and hurt yourself?"

"No."

"Throw me the towel, and have fun."

There was my son, in the middle of the king size bed jumping up and down, squealing with joy, and his mother walks in the door.

"Gordon stop that, you're going to kill yourself."

Gordon stopped, sat in the center of the bed with an unhappy look on his face.

"Jennifer do you remember me, Even, your husband, Gordon's father. The man who was sitting at the edge of the bed, watching him, and his every move, to make sure he didn't hurt himself. Do I have any say so at all as to what he can and cannot do?"

"He's been all I've ever had for the last four years Even. I would die if anything happened to him."

"Do you want me to wrap him in bubble wrap, until he is 18 years old. Then I will send him off to college so he can get every girl there pregnant, and not know why or how he did it?"

"It sounds like a very familiar story doesn't it?"

"I may have heard it before. I don't believe anyone wants to revisit it, do you?"

"Gordon would you please jump up and down again so I can see how you do it."

"Really mommy, do you mean it?"

"Yes baby, just don't fall off the edge of the bed please."

"That's the same thing dad said."

"That's because your father is a very smart man. I think I'll keep him."

"The three of us are going shopping tomorrow. Gordon needs new clothes."

"Gordon's clothes are basically brand-new. I brought them before we left for Alaska."

"Gordon stop jumping for a moment, I have to show you something and ask if you would like to wear it tonight."

"Okay dad, what is it."

I picked up an outfit from the suitcase and showed it to him. Gordon's reaction was exactly what I expected.

"No, not plaid again."

"Do you understand now why we are going shopping tomorrow?"

"Come to mommy Gordon."

"You are not going to cry again, are you mommy?"

"No Gordon, I am not going to cry. We are going to give all your plaid clothing to people in need. Tomorrow we are going to go shopping to buy you all new clothes. If you like them we will buy them, if you do not like them we will not buy them. How does that sound."

"Can dad help me? He has cool taste in clothes."

"I've seen how your father dressed before, and I doubt he has any taste in clothes. However, he can help you if you want him to, as long as I am with you."

"That's great, mom.

"We also have to pick up your new suits Gordon. They are ready."

"Can I wear my jacket and pants tonight?"

"No."

"Yes you can; my colleagues are wearing a jackets and dresses, why can't my son?"

"Why do I have the feeling you two men are ganging up on me?"

"It's very simple my dear, we are. We are going to smother you with kisses to prove it. Right Gordon?"

"Right dad."

We attacked. I pushed Jennifer down onto the bed. Gordon attacked from one side, while I nibbled at and kissed her ear on the other.

Jen pulled Gordon on top of her, and pinched his bottom.

"Young man it's time for you to put underwear on. We have guests downstairs and they wish to meet you."

"In my underwear?"

"No, but it is the first thing you have to put on before you get dressed."

"Dad why do scientists like us always say what we mean, and other people never say what they mean?"

"It's called improper use of language my son. Do you notice when you are at Rosalynn's house she always says exactly what she means. It's because she was an English major in college. She taught English in a very fine university after she graduated college. Most people are not like Rosalynn, and they don't use our language properly."

"Should we send mommy to Rosalynn to take classes in English?"

"That will be quite enough young man; you are looking for a spanking if you continue that line of questioning."

"What did I say wrong this time dad?"

I whispered, "We will discuss it later; let's get you dressed now."

Jennifer said, "Both of you are going to get a spanking if you keep this up."

"Gordon I think we're in trouble."

"Me to dad, me to."

*************

Dinner was an amiable affair which Shelby basically ruled over. He reminded everyone at the table at least a dozen times, maybe two dozen times that what they were hearing tonight was classified above top secret. If they mentioned it to anyone, or used it in any of their own work, they would be in a federal penitentiary for violating the National Secrecy Act as amended after 9/11/2001.




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. As I have it noted, those scenes will be evocative rather than aggressive. They also will be a few and far between. This is going to be a "STORY" for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIVE HUNDRED CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novellas. As always please remember this is "A NOVEL." 

*Note: I informed you several chapters ago that this story could take off into the realm of Science and Science Fiction. Much of this story is developed from Factual Science, although I have taken many liberties with it, and expanded the truth liberally. If you read this story in 25 years, most of this will be 'OLD NEWS'. If you are laughing at me at this moment, remember I am laughing at you. I have done the research before putting fingers to keyboard. Trains do not touch the rails they used to ride on. It is currently happening. It's called levitation. Approaching light speed is no longer a fiction. It's done routinely at C.E.R.N. using massive amounts of electricity, magnets, in a vacuum. Space is the largest vacuum known to man. WE can make magnets of any size, shape, and polarity. Have fun reading this and the next several chapters, while trying to ferret out the actual facts; from the areas I have had a little fun with by stretching the truth a tiny bit. 

**Need to Know: Speed of Light - 186,000 Miles per Second, 671,000,000 Miles per Hour, 16,104,000,000 Miles per Day, 6,000,000,000,000 miles plus or minus 2% in 1 Light Year. 

***** 

CHAPTER 9 

37. Numbers 

As I secured the gates, and the house, I said to my baby, "We have to talk in the morning." 

"Why dad, what's wrong?" 

"If we start now, none of us will get any sleep tonight. Let's do this in the morning when we are all fresh. Gordon is exhausted, and we will need his math skills. Some of your numbers don't add up. I didn't want to say anything while my colleagues were here. They didn't seem to notice. Please go upstairs with Gray, and get some rest. We will discuss this after breakfast." 

"What numbers dad; what didn't make sense?" 

"I'm taking my wife to bed. I'm going to get laid, because it cost me $10 for that privilege. I will see you in the morning. Good night my little love." 

"You can't do this to me dad." 

Jennifer said, "You're wrong, he just did. He promised me something and he is going to deliver. Young woman you are going to sleep. If Gray has to knock you out with a sleeping pill, you will sleep tonight. Are we on the same page Delicious?" 

"Why is sex so damn important?" 

"Why don't you ask the man who gave up 10 months of sex just to be with you." 

"You don't fight fair Jennifer." 

"You are not used to dealing openly with a woman. If you were talking to your father, you would have told him where to go, how to get there, and how long to stay. You do not dare tell me any of those things, do you?" 

Delicious walked into my wife's arms, and hugged her. 

"I'm beginning not to like you Jen. You are much too logical for me to be angry with." 

"Why don't you go to bed, fool around a little bit, and go to sleep? Everything will be fine in the morning." 

"If you screw him to death tonight, I don't have to worry about tomorrow morning." 

"If he's dead, what am I going to do tomorrow night?" 

"There you go again, logic, is there anything you are not logical about?" 

"There is one thing I'm not logical about." 

"Go ahead, this should be earth shattering." 

Jen whispered in my daughter's ear, "I started fucking around when I was 14 years old. I got pregnant when I was 19. I thought all men were created equal. Each man I had was roughly the same size in every dimension. Then I met and married your father. The men I had before him were shaped like rifles. Your father is cannon shaped." 

"That is too much information Jennifer. I didn't need to know that. Yuck, how can you take something that size?" 

"I can't, I'm only able to take half." 

Delicious screamed, ran up the stairs and into her room. 

Gray asked, "What did you tell her?" 

"I told her about my husband." 

"Oh God, from now on she will think I'm a dwarf." He ran to be with my daughter. 

"Why dad, what did mommy tell Delicious?" 

"That is a tale for another time, my son. Now is the time for you to get ready for bed. Do you want another piggyback ride, or are you going to run up the stairs under your own power?" 

"I'll run dad, you look tired." 

My son was truly observant, because this was a very long day, and it was not over yet. My wife had a twinkle in her eye. I had promised to deliver, and I always keep my promises, always. 

"What room would you like to sleep in tonight Gordon? You can sleep in Delicious' room, or the room next to ours." 

"Why would I want to sleep in a girl's room? It's all pink and frilly." 

"Tomorrow, when we go clothes shopping, we will buy you a bedroom set. You can pick that out also." 

"That's cool dad, mommy never let me pick out anything." 

"That's because you were only three, and I did not believe you knew what you wanted." 

"I knew I didn't want to wear plaid." 

"Young man, if you start with me now you are going to bed with a red behind." 

"Dad, what did I say wrong now? Mommy asked me a question, and I told her the truth. How can I get in trouble by telling the truth?" 

"It's very simple my son. Your mother is a woman. We are lowly men. Whatever your mother says is the law. Whatever we respond to her questions is automatically wrong. It doesn't matter if it's the truth, or a lie; we are always wrong. You are going to have to get used to that when we are in space with Brandy and Danielle." 

"You are a dead man Even. You are polluting my son's mind with garbage. You know that's not true." 

"Dearest, how many arguments did I win before we got married?" 

"All of them, of course." 

"Darling, how many arguments have I won since we've been married?" 

"None of them, of course." 

"Do you remember the rules I taught you Gordon?" 

"Yes I do, dad. I understand them now. What do I do when mommy asks me a question? Do I lie to her so she feels good, or do I tell the truth, and get a spanking?" 

"There is always one other option for a person your size. You can hide under the bed, until she calms down, or I save you." 

"Can I have a cell phone so I can call you in an emergency?" 

"I will buy you one when we go shopping tomorrow." 

Jennifer yelled, "No you will not. No four-year-old boy has a cell phone, and my son is not going to be the first." 

"Mom, I could call my girlfriends." 

Jennifer threw her hands up in the air and screamed, "I hate you both. You always gang up on me, and win." 

"Dear, he doesn't have their phone numbers." 

"Yes I do dad, they gave them to me." 

"Son, you are very fast worker. Do you remember what I said to you about all those women living west of the Mississippi River Jen? I think I should amend that to South of the Canadian, and north of the Mexican border. I get more impressed with our little boy every day." 

"You had better get us off this planet before he becomes potent, or Rod is going to be very busy in court with paternity suits." 

"I wonder if we can incorporate him. If they sue him we could have the corporation go bankrupt, and they will not be able to collect any money from him." 

"You're kidding aren't you? In 10 years there should be about 500 million people in this country. Fifty-three percent of them are going to be women. Thirty percent of them will be in their childbearing years. If Gordon gets to 5% of that 30% pregnant, he will be responsible for 14,375,000 babies." 

"He would need a few knee replacements and a lot of sleep in between partners." 

"Sleep, with that schedule, when would he have time?" 

********** 

Tuesday 9:30 AM 

"I wonder if I can get breakfast in before she attacks me." 

"If I was talking to you I would tell you there is no way in hell that was going to happen." 

"If I was listening to you I would tell you I was not listening to you." 

"Tell my father there was nothing wrong with my numbers Gray." 

"It looks like we're going to have a fine day today Even." 

"Yes it does. Another month or so we will start getting a little nip in the air and then the temperature will drop like a rock. It would be a good time to have a house on a cliff in Maui. What could be better than a vacation with my wife, my son, me, and my drawing board?" 

"Hey you did you forget someone?" 

"Jennifer did I forget anyone?" 

"No one who you're talking to dear; I don't believe that person is talking to you either. How could you possibly ask, or get a response from someone like that?" 

"Tell him I'll send him an email." 

"I go through his emails, and anyone he's not talking to I don't deliver to him." 

"There is a conspiracy going on in this house." 

"Even have you written out her eviction notice yet?" 

"I'm having Rod do it. He'll have it certified at the courthouse and a sheriff will serve it to that person whose not talking to me, and I'm not talking to." 

"Who's going to make your engines for the spacecraft?" 

"We decided not to go." 

"When was this momentous decision made? Who left me out of the loop?" 

"I told my husband he could have me or his spaceship, but not both. Of course I told him this while he was getting laid and he made the right choice." 

"You bitch." 

"That will be $10 please." 

"I'm sure if you take your designs to NASA or to the Russians or the Chinese, they will happily help you along." 

"They will steal my designs and take credit for them." 

"I'm sure they'll give you honorable mention 34th of 35th on the list of credits." 

"Can I talk to my father please?" 

"It's not 10 AM; you have another 14 hours to go before you can talk to him." 

"Talk to me please dad." 

"If I ask her to get down on her knees and beg, do you think that's going a little too far Gray?" 

"Are all the guns and knives in the house secured?" 

"There are no guns, and Jennifer is standing by the knives; so I think we're good." 

"I still wouldn't take a chance Even. She might pick me up and throw me at you." 

"Good morning Delicious, welcome to breakfast." 

"This good cop bad cop shit has got to stop." 

Gray said, "Delicious, watch your mouth. We have discussed this at length. Also that is $10 please." 

"I apologize for the use of inappropriate language. I will attempt, no, I will do better." 

"Your apology is accepted. What do you have on your mind?" 

"Last night you said there was something wrong with my numbers. What numbers are wrong and where?" 

"You were way off on the times we are passing the planets. You were talking days when you should've been talking minutes. My colleagues missed it. I didn't want to bring it up last night, while they were here, because I did not wish to embarrass you. Once we leave the earth's gravitational field, and clear the arc of the moon, we will be passing Mars in a little more than 12 minutes, not 12 days. You said we were going to pass Jupiter in 87 days. We will pass Jupiter at one-quarter light speed in 58 minutes. 

As soon as we pass Jupiter the computer will extend and start up the nuclear engine to push us as far past three quarter light speed as we can go. As you said this is just a theory of yours, but as soon as we get close to 80 percent of light speed, we should engage your Ion/H2 drive. There is no sense waiting until we leave our solar system. Between the two engines, if we don't reach 90 percent of light speed, we may as well turn around and come home. It will take us over 1 million Earth years to get close to the nearest star system if we are any slower than that. 

By the 90th day we should have maxed out our speed. We will shut down the nuclear engine, and cool it to minus 77° Kelvin. We can retract the engine into our spacecraft, without worry about radiation contamination, because you did not use metal in your design. Your plans call for Silicon Carbide, and Beryillium Oxide, ceramics with the lowest melting point of the containment vessel being plus 2780 degrees Kelvin. We will program the computer to extend the nuclear engine if the vessel reaches plus 2000° Kelvin. The temperatures of space will return the engine to minus 77° Kelvin without having to restart it, and circulating the Helium around the core. If it doesn't happen automatically, we will program the computer to wake me up, and I will do it manually. 

We can leave the Ion/ H2 engine extended and working, while we pass through the Heliopause and into the Interstellar Medium(ISM). We may pick up more speed, after transiting completely into the Medium, and use the power from it for life support and all our other electrical needs, while leaving our other power sources on standby. 

Boys and girls this is when we will really be in Outer Space. Our Sun will no longer have any effect on us. If the astrophysicists are correct, we will be in the area where 20% of the Universes carbon remains from the aftereffects of the Big Bang. We will be amongst the aftereffects of the building blocks of Stars and Exoplanets. There are comets and meteors here, but almost everything else is miniature. Molecules are the largest things, and you are going to have to search far and wide to find one. However, it has been proven that all the steppingstones of life are out here in abundance if mixed together properly. Amino acids and nucleotides, the raw materials of proteins and DNA are here. We began here in the stars. We belong here." 

"Honey let's not get all sappy." 

"Dad, I have one tiny question for you." 

"Would everyone clear a pathway to the door for me please? I have a feeling I'm going to need room to run. Go ahead dear, keep calm, and ask me your question." 

"I never gave you any information about the design specifications of any of my engines. How did you know I did not use metal in my nuclear reactor? You also knew that I was not just using an ion engine, but an Ion/hydrogen 2 composite engine. I know you are a brilliant engineer, but when did you become a mind reader?" 

"You didn't know that you talked in your sleep." 

"We never slept in the same room." 

"I had a tape recorder in there to listen to you, because your mother used to talk in her sleep." 

"Gray get out my way, I'm about to kill my father." 

"Even it's been very nice working with you. I'll see you in the next world. If I get in her way she will kill me too." 

"Honey, did you sign the property titles and insurance papers over to me. I will give Delicious her share, when she gets out of jail." 

"Dad, you have 30 seconds before I tear your lungs out." 

"Are you going to run away from home, like your idiot uncle did when he found out you broke into his computer files?" 

"You broke into my files? Someone once told me no one has ever broken into his files. The codes are unbreakable. They are 36 increments long. It's not possible to break them." 

"I ran a simple password hitchhiker, and it gave me a hint. It looked much too 'ladylike' for you, which is why I originally couldn't believe it was part of your password. Then I remembered what you said about the people that came up with your formula and disregarded it. I didn't. It turned out that I made the right decision. In a few more moments there were your engines. Someone has to teach you how to draw properly. Your schematics are awful, but your genius is in the outcome of the math. The Hexagonal design of the interface in the nuclear reactor is phenomenal. I've never seen anything quite like it. I believe you are underestimating the amount of electric power you will generate from it, but the outcome will be better for us that way. 

I don't completely understand the Ion/H 2 engine but that's your baby. You say it will work; I believe you. I will stand by your decision to turn it on but I don't want to wait until we leave our solar system. We need speed, and we need all we can get, as soon as we can get it. Once we pass Jupiter, and approach Neptune, we should turn it on. We can't hurt anyone behind us. Let's go for the ride of our lives." 

"Dad we have to go with just the facts as they present themselves at the time." 

Gray asked her, "Who the hell are you Joe Friday?" 

"Who the heck is Joe Friday?" 

"A policeman from the famous cop show, "Dragnet." It was on TV in the late 50s and early 60s. They made a movie about it in 1987 with Dan Aykroyd. 

"My dad wasn't alive in the 50s and 60s. How am I supposed to know about Dragnet?" 

"You knew about Lawrence Welk." 

"Do you really want to start with me this early in the morning Gray?" 

"Next week, this will be the middle of the day for you and me." 

"I think I'll fix all the clocks in the house, and paint the windows in our room black." 

"Have you heard of something called a body clock?" 

"Gray, you are almost there. If I were you I would stop talking to me about now." 

"I love talking to you. It makes your cheeks rosy." 

Gordon asked, "Dad, I thought sap came from trees." 

Delicious laughed. "I'm going to eat your belly for breakfast Gordon. You are too cute." 

"You just ate your breakfast, leave my belly alone." 

Delicious got up from the table and ran around it to get him. 

He was too smart for her. He slipped out of his booster seat, went under the table, and hid between a mass of legs. 

"Come out here you cheater, and fight like a man." 

"I'm not a man; I'm only a little boy." 

"If you don't come out and play with me, I'm not going to take you tubing this winter." 

"That's all right, my daddy will." 

For the first time since I've known him, I had to disappoint my son. 

"I'm sorry Gordon I don't go tubing. Only crazy people go tubing, that's why Delicious goes. It is very fast and very exciting, but I enjoy being on my snowmobile going a little slower but staying in control. Many people go tubing and they say it's fun. I will allow you to go only if you go with Gray at your side. Gray has a calming influence on Delicious. He keeps your sister from going over the edge." 

"Does that make Gray my brother?" 

"Yes it does." 

"That is so cool. Gray you are my first brother. All I've ever had before was girls in my family. You have never seen so many dresses in your life. Every closet you hide in is filled with dresses. I was beginning to believe I was born to the wrong family." 

"Gordon whatever family you were born into would have been blessed to have you. You are the smartest little boy I have ever been privileged to know. It's 10 o'clock, your program just came on." 

"Thank you Gray. Today they're talking about The Stones of Stenness. The group of islands off the northwest coast of Scotland; where they found Monoliths that pre-date Stonehenge by 3000 years. It was such an advanced culture it was thousands of years ahead of Rome, Greece, Persia, and Egypt. Why we are just finding out about it now is a mystery." 

"Sounds like another little bit of light entertainment for you." 

"Yes, it's just something to keep my mind off math for a little while." 

Gray started choking at the table. Delicious was only too happy to pound on his back. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09



"Delicious if you don't stop, I'm going to take you upstairs and teach you another lesson." 

"Is this the good lesson or the bad lesson?" 

"Do you really need me to answer that for you?" 

"No, I think I'll stop." 

"Excellent choice, sit on my lap and listen to the rest of your father's lecture." 

"What happens if something pops up?" 

"We will deal with it later, much later." 

"Are we finished children, if so I do not have much more to go through." 

Delicious settled her ass comfortably on Grey's lap, and received a nibble on her ear and a kiss on her neck in return. 

Jennifer passed behind him, carrying a carafe of coffee, and smacked him on his head. 

"Pay attention Dr. Thyme, but not to her; would you like more coffee?" 

"No thank you, I'm good." 

"From the sounds coming out of your bedroom, I would say you're a very good." 

"Jennifer, stop that, it's embarrassing." 

"No it's not Delicious. It's called sex; and it's wonderful isn't it dear?" 

"I would bet my life on it, not my wife, my life." 

"Would your father have uttered those words six weeks ago Delicious?" 

"I don't think my father knew about sex six weeks ago, but you have taught him a lot very quickly." 

"I got my PhD in sex very early in life. I found the love of my life little bit later." 

"Here we go getting sappy again. Can we finish this little discussion and maybe Gray and I can go straighten up our room." 

"Is that what they are calling it these days: Straightening up your room? When I was younger we used to call it, 'Getting something straight between us.' However, if it works for you it's fine with me." 

"Jennifer, you are incorrigible." 

"Yes I am, isn't it wonderful?" 

"If you two don't mind, let me finish, and this sexual bantering can go on for the rest of the day, while I go to work downstairs." 

"Go ahead Even; at least I will be listening to you." 

"Thank you Gray, now where was I. When we go into stasis, whether we are at .9 or .999 of light speed it doesn't matter. When we get there, we get there. The computers will wake Gordon up first, and he will check our position. Once he verifies everything is okay, he will wake up the rest of us. He will probably have a party with Danielle and Brandy first, but he'll get us up soon enough." 

"Dad that was awful." 

Gordon came running into the room carrying a fistful of his money. "I heard you talking dad. How much money do I need to have a party with Danielle and Brandy?" 

I looked at Jennifer and shook my head. "When we go out today let's see if we can find a stapler big enough to keep my mouth shut when he's around." 

"Why do you need a stapler dad?" 

"Sometimes son I say inappropriate things when I'm not thinking. It's not a good thing to do with a young man running around the house." 

"Can I still invite them for the party?" 

"We are busy this weekend, but if you give mommy their phone numbers, I'm sure we can set up a party for the following weekend for Danielle, Brandy, Rod's children, and a few of their friends. Maybe we will even invite you to your Birthday Party." 

"Thanks dad, I think I'll invite you too." With that, my son disappeared in the flash. 

I yelled, "We're leaving in five minutes." 

His head popped out of the playroom door and I knew I was in trouble. "Is that a man's five minutes, or woman's five minutes dad?" 

Gray tapped me on the shoulder and laughed as he walked away with Delicious. 

"Do you remember what I told you about the rules Gordon? You are never supposed to talk about them when the women are around." 

"Oh yeah dad, I forgot that part. I'm sorry. Forget I said anything." 

Before I could say a word, a towel hit me in the head. "You are filling my sons head up with garbage." 

I walked over to my wife, with the towel hanging over my head and asked her a question. "I can walk out the door in less than five minutes. Can you? You told me you wanted to leave the house by 10:30 AM. The time now is 10:25 AM what do you think?" 

"I think you're not getting laid tonight." 

"I think you are going to miss it more than I am." 

"That's not fair Even, I waited a long time for you." 

"I waited longer for you. I waited a lifetime for you and it was worth it. Do you want to crawl into a closet with me for a minute?" 

"Guess who would open the door." 

"Do you want to take a shower?" 

"I could use one." 

"Do you need anyone to wash your back?" 

"I have an itch on my back that I have not been able to scratch." 

"I have been known to be a very good itch scratcher." 

"We need a babysitter." 

I know exactly where to get one." 

I yelled, "Delicious could you come down here for a moment." 

I waited a moment and called again. "Delicious could you come down here for a moment." 

Jennifer was doing everything except undressing next to me, when I finally yelled, "Delicious come down here." 

I heard her door open and she screamed, "DAD WE'RE BUSY!" 

"I thought you were straightening out your room?" 

"We are, sort of." 

Jennifer said, "Now I really need a shower, a really cold shower. I'm going to kill you very slowly. You did this to me. You better make it up to me tonight." 

To paraphrase the saying: The best laid plans... The only problem was neither my wife nor I was getting laid. Come to think of it, neither was my daughter, nor Gray. All four of us struck out. This turned out to be one hell of a morning. 

"Gordon, I am going downstairs to do some work on Sequoia. Do you..." 

My son was at my side before the last vowel of Sequoia was out my mouth. 

He sat in the number one position which was now permanently his. The chair was set at his height, and I no longer told him what to do during his time on the machine. As far as he was concerned it was playtime. I just made sure everything he put into the machine was saved so Gray and I could decipher it later. Geniuses came in all sizes and shapes. This one was my son. I had to remind Rod to make that soon, and permanent. 

****** 

We did go shopping that day, but we didn't leave until after lunch, and didn't get back until after dinner. Unlike my daughter, when we went furniture-shopping Gordon did not touch anything, he surveyed. He walked down the aisle casually, without stopping, and said, "No. No. No. We will take this one mom." 

Jennifer was horrified. "How can you say that Gordon; you didn't open a drawer, you didn't sit on the bed. You didn't do anything." 

"I like the style of the furniture and the color mommy. You are going to buy me a different mattress. Why would I want to sit on that mattress? Can I have this bedroom set please?" 

I didn't say a word. I'm not sure I breathe. Gordon was looking straight at his mother and I was not going to let her out of this one by butting in. 

"Are you sure honey?" 

"Gordon let his shoulders slip down, and sighed, "Alright mom, if you're not happy with this one, you can pick one out for me. I don't want to see you to cry." 

I could feel it in my bones. She was waiting for me to say something, anything to help her along. I wasn't going to do it. This one was for her. Big black eyes, staring up into bigger black eyes. Mommy's heart finally melted. 

"You can have it Gordon." 

Our son did a victory dance in the area his furniture was in. Now he opened the drawer's and tested the headboard and slid under the bed. Now he felt entitled to do the things a young boy would do with something he owned. 

Meanwhile, his mother stood in the aisle being consoled by his father. She had given her son away to the Military for the next 20 years. Her four-year-old child had picked out his own bedroom set. How could any mother allow that to happen? 

That was only the beginning of our afternoon. We picked up his suits and he looked wonderful in them. The owner brought in some extra slacks and shirts for him just in case we wanted more. 

Jennifer said he didn't need any more dress clothes. 

I thanked the owner and told him to box everything up that he purchased for us. 

Jennifer turned a beautiful color rose before we left the store. 

I could only guess what her blood pressure was. I had a feeling that I was in deep shit. 

We went to another young man's store to buy casual clothes for him. Jennifer started looking in one area, while Gordon and I looked in another. Gordon could not believe the first shirt she put against his chest. 

He said mournfully, "Mom, don't do it please." 

"Honey it's a gorgeous shirt." 

"Mom, please don't." 

"Oh God, I forgot, its plaid, I'll put it back." 

It turned out that my wife had a fetish for stripes and plaids for her son. Many of her clothes had stripes on them, which made her look taller. However, when it came to her son, her hands automatically went towards those styles. It reached the point that Gordon hid every time he saw his mother was an armload of clothes. 

Unfortunately, for him, she knew where all his hiding places were. I could not see him. He was not visible on the floor underneath it, and his hands were not holding on to the top. If I didn't know where he was I could never have found him. 

Jennifer handed me the heap of clothes she was carrying, and walked directly to the round he was hiding in. She looked down through the center of it. 

"Young man when was the last time you were able to hide from me in a store?" 

"I was two and half mommy." 

"Does September 30 mean anything to you?" 

"Yes mommy, it's my birthday. I become five years old." 

"Would you like to live that long?" 

"Yes mommy, I'll come out." 

He crawled out from underneath the slacks, and looked up at his mother. 

"How much trouble am I in mommy?" 

"I will let you know after you finish trying on the clothes I gave to your father." 

He looked at the armload of clothes I was holding and thought he would be here until the store closed. 

I said to him, "Come on son let's try these clothes on." 

Jennifer said, "I do that with him." 

"I have to learn how to do it, don't I?" 

I didn't know if she realized I was up to something or not, but she said, "Okay, go ahead." 

We took the largest dressing room they had, and I separated the clothes by type, and maker. If she had five shirts from the same company, I held them up to make sure they were all the same size. I never believe the tags that are inside them. I did the same thing with the Jeans, corduroys, and everything else she gave me. When I was finished, I tried one of each item on Gordon. If one fit, they all fit. If one did not fit, they all did not fit. It took us all of 10 minutes to go through 35 items. 

"I like your way of trying on clothes dad. It's much easier then mommy's way." 

"It's another rule that you are not allowed to tell a woman about Gordon. If they find out we are all in trouble." 

"How many rules are there dad?" 

"There is not an exact number Gordon. Women keep changing the ground rules on us. Every time they change the rules we have to compensate for them by making new rules for them. It's a never ending battle between the sexes." 

"Is it always a problem, or is it fun too?" 

"Sometimes it's an awful lot of fun Gordon, more fun than you can possibly imagine at your age." 

"I will be five soon, will I understand then?" 

"No, you will have to be much older before you understand." 

"Are you going to get me my cell phone?" 

"I am going to give it to you before we leave the mall." 

"That's cool dad, thank you." 

I had Jennifer and Gordon go into the Chinese restaurant ahead of me to order dinner. I stopped at a kiosk and picked up Gordon's cell phone. It was the tiniest thing I had ever seen, but it was perfect for a four-year-old with tiny fingers. It measured 3" x 3". It could make and receive calls and text messages. It was a cute little phone. It was also expensive. I bought it for him anyhow, and had it set up with my cell phone carrier. By the time I entered the restaurant my food was on the table, getting cold, but that didn't matter when I saw the light in my son's eyes explode with delight, when I showed him HIS cell phone 

"Wow dad, it looks like a spy telephone." 

I humored my son by telling him it was a spy telephone, and it was the newest thing on the market. He was thrilled. 

Jennifer said to me, "You do know I am not going to have any control over my son if you keep doing this." 

I said to her that it would never happen. 

"Look at me Gordon. All these wonderful things I buy for you is because I love you, and you are a wonderful boy. There is only one thing you have to do for me in return. You must continue to love and respect your mother as you do today. I love your mother very much. I will not allow you or anyone else to hurt her. If you want me to continue to buy you all these wonderful things, all you have to do for me is this one big thing. I don't think it will be very hard for you to do, because you already love your mother." 

"I will always love my mommy dad. She was there when I was born." 

"Yes Gordon I know. You were there also." 

"I was going to say that." 

"You already said that several times before. Now hug your mother before she starts crying." 

He kissed and hugged his mother, and then he asked me, "Why do women always cry?" 

"It's the way God made them. When they are very happy, or very sad, they cry. Right now I think your mother is very happy." 

"Why is she happier now than she was this afternoon?" 

"Your mother knows after we finish eating, and you stop questioning me about everything, and anything under the sun, we can go home." 

"Can I make a phone call when we are in the car?" 

"This was your last question, and this is my final answer. Yes you can." 

"Thanks dad." 

******* 

Gordon sat in his safety seat, talking on his new cell phone with Brandy. The woman in the passenger seat was not happy with me. She looked at the amount of clothing in the rear of the Q7, and every time she turned a page in her magazine I thought she was going to rip it out of its binding. 

"Was that my arm or my leg you were tearing out?" 

"If I was your daughter I would say I am not talking to you. However, I am your wife, and I can do much worse than that." 

"I will make it up to you by being extremely inventive tonight while we are in bed. I will ask you to forgive me my transgressions; all you have to do is tell me what they were." 

"You are taking my little boy away from me. I have never had a man in my life, and he has never had a man in his. He has latched on to you as he would to his biological father from the day he was born. I can't say I'm not happy about it, because I always wanted you two to get along. I just never thought it would happen this fast." 

"What would you like me to do? If I turn my affection for him off, he will think he did something wrong. I don't want you to be hurt. I don't want Gordon to be hurt. I don't care about me, I will survive, but you are my life, and he is my son. What do you want me to do?" 

"Is there any way I can get involved in the spaceship project?" 

"We have already decided that you were going to drive it." 

"How do you drive a spaceship?" 

"Very carefully." 

"That's not funny Even." 

"How else would you describe flying something off the ground that weighs 6,000,000 pounds, at 100 miles an hour, and two minutes later is flying at 16,000 miles an hour?" 

"Hair-raising, mind-boggling, death-defying, are those good enough for you?" 

"I can think of a few more, but those will do just fine. The computer will do most of the flying, but you will be the pilot in command. From now on when we go downstairs, you come with us; no more girly shopping." 

"That's not fair Even. A woman has a right to shop. It's written in the Constitution. It's in the First Amendment. "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. If I can't shop I can't be happy." 

"I will work to see if I can give you a few hours off on Saturday mornings." 

"You had better see I get all day Saturday off." 

"I'll think about it." 

She reached down, retrieved her magazine, and began reading. 

Jennifer's flowing skirt had risen slightly above her knee so I decided to tease her. 

I slipped my hand under the skirts' fabric, made a very quick move to her pussy, and began rubbing my fingers into her slot. 

She held my wrist in a death grip, and her panties became wet instantly. She said to me, "If you don't finish me I will cut off this hand." 

"Babe we have company in the back seat." 

"I don't give a fuck. You started this, make me cum." 

"Is this a bad time to remind you that you owe the cookie jar $10?" 

"Is this a bad time to say if you don't complete what you started you are going to need an oral surgeon?" 

"Open your window a few inches; we need a little noise in the car." 

"Do you always think of everything?" 

"No, but he (Gordon) does." 

I slipped my fingers behind the flimsy fabric of her panties, and touched the smooth clean flesh surrounding her vagina. I let my thumb slide down the center, and played over the hooded warrior, until the nerve center popped out from underneath it. It is such fun to play with so many reactive nerves at one time, and watch your partner become disabled at the same moment. There is no other section of the female body that has the same control over it then the tiny clitoris. I centered my play on this tiny piece of flesh. My wife's hips started fighting her safety belt, trying to get my finger to touch her harder, and in another area to satisfy her. She was grunting in annoyance with me. 

My eyes stayed on the road instead of on her. I was using the braille method of sexual stimulation, and while you are driving it is the best way to stay alive. 

I took a quick look at Jen and she had lost 4 inches in height. She would have lost a lot more, but that was all her safety belt would allow her to go. Her knees were spread as wide as the car would permit her, and her skirt was up around her waist. Thankfully, Gordon's seat was behind her, and not behind me. 

My wife said to me, "Faster dammit." 

Who was I to argue with a beautiful woman, my wife, my love, my life? 

Her hips arched as high off the seat as she could. She was sweating profusely. She was right there when it happened. Another few seconds and it would have been over. 

"How do you turn this phone off dad?" 

My wife grabbed my wrist so I would not leave her in dire need. I also had to answer my sons question without any undue delay. 

I said to Gordon and a slightly louder voice than normal, "Hit the red button that says End." 

"Oh, thanks dad, I see it." 

As I said this, I shoved three fingers into my wife's vagina. I was rewarded with a handful of fluids, and a moan that lasted forever. 

She collapsed her thighs against my hand and said, with a sheepish grin, "Thanks dad." 

I rewarded her by continuing to move my fingers in and out of her vagina until her hips started moving again. 

"No, not again, he will hear me this time." 

I held the steering wheel with my knees, and opened my window. The roar of the traffic passing us drowned out our conversation. I pumped and pumped my fingers into her and her hips responded as best they could. I moved my thumb into position above her clit and began pressing down on it. 

"Fuck," was the only word she said as she approached her second climax. I felt her abs tighten, her legs stiffen, and her left hand was getting ready to shatter my Ulna. 

She brought her right hand to her mouth and bit it as she screamed in ecstasy. Her body became part at the seams as she rested against back of the seat without saying another word. 

When we arrived home I let Gordon out of the car. He ran to the front door and Gray let him in. He came out to help me with my packages, and saw Jennifer sleeping. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09



He looked at me warily. 

"It's been a long tough day Gray. Wait until you have children and have them try on clothes for three hours. You would be unconscious also." 

"It must've been torture." 

"The medieval kind of torture. I was thinking about putting needles into my eyes to make the pain go away." 

"That might have hurt a little." 

"How did my daughter do today?" 

"She had a smile on most of the day." 

"Good work Gray, keep it up. She will become a human being soon enough." 

"Did Jennifer have a good day?" 

"No woman enjoys giving up control of the purchases that are being made. She allowed Gordon to pick out his own bedroom set. I thought she was going to collapse on the showroom floor after she said okay. Then we picked up his suits and other items at the specialty store, before we started our main shopping. That's where she showed her skill. I've never seen anything like it in my life. It has to be in the human genome structure that women are born to shop. Women are walking around the store carrying 200 pounds of clothes in their arms, wheeling a stroller, and have three other children walking with them. To them it's like an everyday occurrence, to me I would rather be run over by a concrete truck. Gordon tried to hide as his mother approached with an armload of clothes. She threw them to me and went straight to him. I'm telling you Gray, it's genetic. There is no other way to explain it." 

"Are you two finished yapping back there? A woman can't even take a nap after a hard day shopping when two men get together, and don't remember to whisper." 

"I'm sorry Jen; I just came outside to help you and Even bring in some packages. I'll be quieter for the next trip, and the next trip, and the next trip." 

"You're not being funny Gray. I have barely scratched the surface for my son's wardrobe. Would you like to come with me tomorrow?" 

"I'll check my schedule, but I'm almost sure I'm busy for the next 10 years possibly longer. I love shopping, but work must come first." 

"You have to come up with a better lie then that one. Delicious will tear you apart otherwise." 

As Gray walked away with some packages he said, "You have to give me some time; all this is new to me also." 

Jennifer got out of the car and started walking towards me. She had a look on her face I couldn't quite read, but flashing back to my conversation with Gray I thought I was in trouble. Suddenly, she launched herself at me, with such power; she knocked me to the ground. She began kissing me everywhere she could reach, and started unbuttoning my shirt so she could get to more. 

I did not remain idle during her attack. My hands were roaming all over her glorious body. I had every inch memorized, but memorization has no feeling. Touching her is heavenly. Many times Rod asked me what I was waiting for. Jennifer was it. Jennifer was who I was waiting for. She was everything I could have ever asked for in a woman, in a mother, and in a wife. I was fortunate to blunder into her, while I was running away from another woman in my life that I loved. 

I grew tired of being attacked, so I flipped Jennifer onto her back and attacked her. I'm not sure how long we were at it, but I had her left nipple in my mouth, and my hand on her pussy, when my daughter said, "Couldn't you two wait until you got into your bedroom? This open display of sexuality with impressionable underage children around could be detrimental to their successful introduction to society. They may think all adults are animals." 

Jennifer looked up at my daughter and growled. "Missy you are in deep shit. I was right there. No one steals an orgasm from me. You had better pray your father finds that one in a hurry. If I don't cum, I am coming after you, and you are not going to be happy with me when I catch you." 

She was gone in a flash. She was here, and then she wasn't. 

"Babe, I think you made my daughter pee in her pants. I've never seen her move that quickly." 

"She's lucky I came before she got here. I would really have been upset otherwise. Would you help me up please; there is a stone under my ass and it's hurting me." 

"I'll bend you over the hood of the car, kiss it, and make it better. Then I'll do a lot of other things while you are bent over it." 

"I don't think so. Gray has been here. Delicious has been here. Guess who will be here next?" 

"I guess we'll take the packages into the house, and get things straight between us later." 

"That is okay with me, or we could straighten up our room." 

"That works for me. Either way, we are going to need a shower afterwards. I love showers." 

"Me too, and if you're good, I'll let you scratch my back." 

Wednesday 

After dinner, I tapped my glass, and my bride turned towards me to get a kiss. I looked towards her and realized what I had done, so I kissed her quickly. 

I said to everyone, "I did not tap my glass to get a kiss from my bride, although it was wonderful, as always. However, it has been one full week, and my son has not said one bad word. He wins the contents of the 'COOKIE JAR!'." 

Everyone at the table stood up and applauded, including Gordon. The first thing he did was take the $100 bills from under the cookie jar and hand them to his mother. "Buy something nice for yourself mommy." 

The water works started instantly, and Jen ran out of the room. 

"What did I do wrong now dad?" 

"Absolutely nothing, what you did was positively perfect." 

"Why is mom crying?" 

"She's crying because she loves you, and you just showed her you love her very much." 

"Dad, it was only money." 

"Yes but it was your money and you gave it to your mother. It was a gift from your heart. I think you should go to your mother. I think she needs a hug." 

"Even that boy is going to be a lady killer. I've never seen a child his age do everything so right." 

"Maybe you should take notes Gray." 

"I'm waiting to see the contract before I make any comments to you madam." 

"How many times do I have to tell you I am a miss, not a madam?" 

"Sometimes, I really wonder, not about your sexual status, but what is between your ears. You are brilliant. However somewhere deep inside your gray matter, I believe Rod is correct. There is evil deep inside you, and I have the scratches to prove it. If I had not taken the self-defense courses, when I was younger, you would be scraping me up off the floor, with pleasure written all over your face. You would be the Dominant personality, and you would expect me to be the Submissive. Well, MISSY, it's not going to happen. We will either be equals or you and I are going to need a referee. Jennifer looks like a good one to me." 

"Oh no, not Jennifer, she is too logical. I can't get anywhere with her." 

"I know that is exactly why she would be perfect as a mediator: Logic over Lying." 

Jennifer asked, "How much do mediators make per hour Even?" 

"I don't know dear, but at the rate these two are going, whatever it is and the amount of hours you are going to be working you will not need your inheritance. You are going to be rich beyond your wildest imagination." 

"Thanks dad, I needed to hear that right now." 

"I'm only too glad to help dear. I just raised your salary to $150 an hour. Jennifer is only going to charge you $300 an hour. Gray, because you are now family, we are going to give you a discount. Jen is only going to charge you $10 an hour." 

"Why am I being charged $300 an hour, and Gray only $10 an hour?" 

"It's only logical to charge the belligerent patient more than the calm patient." 

"I hate you with every fiber of my being. I am not talking to you for the rest of today and tomorrow; possibly the next day also. I'll think about it. This session is over." 

Gordon walked back into the room pulling Jennifer with him. "Mommy's feeling better now. She stopped crying." 

"How did you manage that Gordon?" 

"I hugged her and kissed her, and told her everything would be all right tomorrow when the Sun is up. She believed me." 

"What happens if it's cloudy, or raining?" 

"Dad, you should know better than that. The sun is always up in the daytime; sometimes we can't see because of the clouds and rain, but it's always there." 

There is nothing in this world like being a world-renowned scientist, and being taken down a few pegs by a four-year-old boy. I dropped my head, and hit it against the table with a resounding bang. 

Everyone was bent over laughing, including me. I don't believe I ever laughed that hard, and that long in my life. Later that evening I sent an email to Shelby and Robert Meil telling them what happened at dinner. I knew they would be laughing with me also. 

The next order of business was to count the money that was in the pretzel jar. Gordon wanted to do that himself; but all the money was crinkled. We decided to divide and conquer. We dumped the money on the table; put it in stacks of 10s, 20s, 50s, and 100s. We straightened them, and placed them in front of Gordon. There was 11 weeks of improper language money in there and Gordon was going to be rich by the time he finished counting. His eyes kept getting bigger and bigger as he finished each pile.  

"Where did all this money come from dad?" 

Delicious said, "There is four weeks of my salary is in there Gordon." 

"Do you want it back; I don't need all this money?" 

"How much is in there Gordon?" 

"$9310." 

Jennifer asked, "Gordon may I have my $30 back?" 

"Sure mom, do you want three 10 dollar bills or one 10 dollar bill and one 20 dollar bill?" 

Jennifer replied, "I think I'll take you instead." She grabbed him and hugged him, until he squealed with laughter." 

"Dad if I give you the money could you get me a subscription to Bloomberg's report?" 

"We can do that online son." 

"Can I start now?" 

"Gray would you tell the person I'm not talking to, and who is not talking to me, to help Jennifer with the kitchen." 

"Gray would you tell the person I'm not talking to that I will be glad to help Jennifer with the kitchen." 

"Oh, luckiest person in this room, the person who is not talking to you and you are not talking to has granted your request. I am going to go with you and Gordon to take lessons on how to beat the stock market." 

Delicious smacked him on the back of his head and punched him in his ribs. 

Gray didn't bother to turn around. 

Everyone stood up from the table and began moving towards their destination, except Gray. He made a 270° turn and smacked Delicious violently on her ass. 

She couldn't do anything but scream in pain. Her feet were dancing on the floor, while her hands were holding her right cheek. Gray was standing right behind her waiting for her to start calming down. 

When she did, he took her right arm, and bent it towards her shoulder blade. He walked her towards the front door, and yelled at her. 

"How many times do I have to tell you to behave yourself? If you are not going to behave, I'm going to take you over my knee, drop your pants, and spank you until you are red. Do you understand me Delicious?" 

She had tears in her eyes, from the pain, when she said, "I believe we've come to a meeting of the minds Gray." 

"Is that where your mind is? If I had known that I would've talked to that area before." 

"Gray a little levity right now is not called for. My ass hurts like hell, and a little TLC couldn't hurt. You can go downstairs and learn about the stock market, or you can come upstairs and put some cream on my ass. Which do you think is going to be the better choice?" 

"I'll meet you upstairs as soon as you finish the kitchen." 

"That was a very, very good choice on your part. Any other choice would have resulted in bloodshed." 

"There was only one other choice." 

"I am aware of that, I am also aware of where the steak knives are." 

"I will see you shortly, don't start without me." 

"I wouldn't have to start if it wasn't for you." 

"Yes, but look at the benefits you will receive now." 

"I'm still in pain, you will benefit not me." 

"I'll kiss it and make it better." 

"It's beginning to sound more interesting by the minute." 

"I could accidentally miss my target." 

"Would it help if I had a pillow under my stomach?" 

"Oh yes, I could use my hands and my lips at the same time. You know me, I love to multitask." 

"Yes multitask, I like that word. I'll finish the kitchen." 

****** 

"You finished the kitchen by yourself Jennifer?" 

"What was I supposed to do while you two were canoodling by the front door; sit on my hands? You two have to talk to each other more often, and not just after fighting. If you don't, you will start picking fights just to talk. That is not a good precedent to start." 

"We talk all the time." 

"You talk about work all the time. You talk about computers, you talk about space you talk about this project or that project; but you have to talk about each other. Even and I have only known each other for a very short time. I'll bet we know more about each other than most couples do. How many young women tell their husbands about their past sexual exploits? How many young women tell their husbands about their families, not only the good parts but the bad parts? What would a young woman do, when she's just about to get married finds out that her husband committed incest with his sister, and they had a child that lives with him? What would the young woman normally do?" 

"She would smack him, and run back to her family." 

"You are correct. She would not give him the opportunity to explain what happened. 

Your father's case is totally out of the ordinary. For 16 years he never knew you were his child. What's worse is you never knew you had a father, who would have loved you, like Even Luck would have loved you. Close your eyes, and look back at your life. Picture it without Julius Mark in it. Think of Even and Divine Luck as your parents for those 16 years. What kind of person would you be right now? How happy would you be? That is the person you have to be. That is the person your mother wants you to be. As much as she defended you from your rotten father and the malicious kids at your school that is the person she wants you to be. Be that person Delicious; BE THAT PERSON." 

Jennifer folded Delicious into her arms as she sobbed. "Where the hell did my father find you?" 

"We were on an airplane on our way to Fairbanks. Gordon picked a conversation with him that lasted almost 4 hours. I was thoroughly impressed with him. If Gordon had fallen asleep I would've screwed your father on the plane. It would have hurt like hell, but he was the sexiest man I had ever known." 

"My dad is sexy?" 

"Your dad has the sexiest mind in the world. That weapon of his also comes in handy." 

"Let's not talk about his weapon again please." 

"I may be able to take the whole thing after I have a baby." 

"Jennifer no more please." 

"Are you jealous?" 

"No, but I made a promise like dad did with you. I'm waiting until my wedding night, and you talking like that is not helping me." 

"There is only one thing that separates the good girls from the bad girls." 

"Why do I have the feeling I'm not going to like this answer. Go ahead what separates the good girls from the bad girls?" 

"The bad girls go to prison." 

"Jennifer that was horrible. No it was worse than horrible, it was disgusting." 

"You couldn't be more wrong if you tried. Disgusting is giving a blow job right after you have anal sex." 

"Oh yuck, that is disgusting." 

"You're right those little brown things on his dick are not cornflakes." 

"Jennifer you are awful. We did you hear these things?" 

"That's what I learned when I went to college. For the few months I was there I learned dirty jokes, filthy jokes, and gruesome jokes. I missed most of my classes because I was busy getting laid and I wound up pregnant with Gordon. That was the happiest accident in my life." 

"If there is a perfect little boy in this world, it is your son. I love him, I really do." 

Gray asked, "Why aren't you in bed with your ass in the air?" 

"My master calls. I was receiving counseling from my aging mother." 

"What is it with this aging shit miss. " 

Delicious walked to the table, picked up the empty pretzel jar, and handed it to Jennifer. 

"Congratulations that will be the first $10 of this new round please." 

Delicious walked out of the kitchen, took Gray by the hand, and started walking up the stairs. 

Jennifer yelled, "I'm not talking to you anymore. I don't like you. I have never liked you, and furthermore I don't like your hair either. You should cut it all off and start again. I will do it for you myself while you're sleeping." 

Delicious yelled back, "You're just jealous because you have black hair." 

"I don't run around the house naked." 

"That's a low blow Jennifer." 

"Did you say you blew him while you were naked?" 

"Four times, and he never got soft." 

Gray said, "Really, where was I?" 

"Shut up Gray." 

"Good night children, have fun." 

********* 

Late Thursday Evening 

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" 

"I couldn't sleep so I thought I would go for walk." 

"Gray my eyes aren't open and I can tell you're lying to me. Would you like to try that again, before I get out of bed and scratch your eyes out?" 

"I'm going to play high-stakes poker game with the boys." 

"This is your last chance; the next time I see that thing of yours I'm going to bite it off." 

"That is downright mean. I haven't used it on you yet, and you are going to bite off. That doesn't seem fair." 

"If you keep lying to me, you will never use it on me. It will be in the contract." 

"I will go back to work for NASA." 

"It's been nice knowing you." 

"Do you know how much I hate you?" 

"Yes, a little bit more or less than I hate you." 

"Bitch." 

"Watch your language Gray, someone told me I had to watch mine." 

He pulled down the covers, and sat on the bed beside her. His left hand moved between her thighs, and his mouth descended on her nipple. He played with her for several minutes and felt her respond. 

She moaned, and licked his ear. "Now, where did you say you are going?" 

"Doesn't anything distract you?" 

"Yes, science, math, physics, analytical geometry..." 

"Enough, I've heard enough. You are a bitch. You are as wet as can be, and you can still joke with me." 

"You have no idea how close I am to cuming; but before I let you finish me, you are going to tell me where you going and what you're going to do while you're there. If you don't, I am going to turn over and go back to sleep. When you come back to bed your side will be filled with ice, and my side will be colder than that." 

"This is top, top secret; you cannot tell Gordon, because it may accidentally slip out of his mouth." 

"I understand, go ahead." 

"I'm going downstairs to make chocolate pudding." 

"You're dead man." 

"I told you I didn't want it falling out Gordon's mouth." 

"Goodbye Gray, I would check your bed when you come home. Whoever she is I hope she's worth it." 

"I would never do that to you. I will never cheat on you. Well, maybe if they give me a chance to fly the F-35 that would be close but..." 

"Leave, get out of our room, I'm finished talking with you, I'm going back to sleep. If you can't tell me the truth it means you don't trust me. If you don't trust me it means we are not meant to be together. I won't bother writing up a contract, I'll move back into my room in the morning." 

"You said ANYTHING." 

"That was before you started lying to me." 

"I have not lied to you yet." 

"Yes you have; we have no chocolate pudding in the house, which means you can't make it. You lied to me. You can leave, and do what you want to do." 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09



"I'm going on a trip to Washington D. C. with Rod to file your father's patent for the radio waves as soon as the patent office opens. I will be back tomorrow morning. Your father is bringing you to the airport to pick us up. We will switch cars. Your father will come home with Rod, while you and I buy running shoes. Your father has a feeling something is going to happen next week and wants the patent filed before then. He wants Rod and I back before anyone notices we are missing. I chartered a Gulfstream 650 because it is the fastest aircraft available. If we leave Washington by 10 AM EST we will land here 11 AM MST. No one should know anything was out of the ordinary." 

"Let me get dressed, I will go with you." 

"No, you will screw up all our plans. Your father wants people to see you with him when he leaves the house in the morning." 

"You stay here, and I'll go with Rod." 

"Are you listening to this Even?" 

"Yes I am. I'll bring in the ropes." 

"Why is my dad bringing ropes in to this room?" 

"We are going to tie to the bed. We knew you would object to our plan, so we had plan 'B' ready for you." 

"Am I getting that predictable?" 

"Does the sun rise in the east every morning?" 

"I don't like you. You are making fun of me. You are taking advantage of a teenage girl. You are supposed to be the adult." 

"Do you remember what you said about Gordon Monday night? The look on your face right now is just too cute." 

Gray put his hands between her thighs, and rubbed up and down slowly. He kissed her, and nibbled on her lower lip. 

I walked into their room and asked, "Is this what you needed the ropes for?" He turned and left the room instantly. 

Delicious yelled, "Knock first dad." 

"I was called for first. Let me know when you two are done please. I have to go wash my eyes out with soap." 

"I believe your father is going to kill me." 

"He will have to wait in line; I am going to kill you first. How dare you think of tying me to this bed?" 

"I've had dreams about doing that to you, since I first kiss you. Having complete access to your body, and having absolute control over it, would be a dream come true." 

"Make a list; I'll see what I can do about it." 

"REALLY!" 

"Can I go to Washington with you?" 

"No." 

"I hope you have an eraser for that pencil." 

"Bitch." 

"I believe that's $30, and someone has to learn to watch his language." 

"Is it safe to come in there yet?" 

"I only need one piece of rope Even; I'm going to strangle her with it." 

"Can I watch?" 

"I hate you dad. I'm not talking to you for the rest of the day." 

"It is 11:30 PM, are you not talking to me for 30 minutes or all day tomorrow?" 

"Why are both of you fucking with me tonight?" 

"That will be $10 please." 

"You are pissing me off dad." 

"Do you want the rope or not Gray?" 

"Baby do I need to rope, or are you going to be good?" 

"You know me Gray; when I'm good I'm very good, when I'm bad, I'm awesome." 

"Even bring the ropes in." 

"Is it safe; the soap is still burning my eyes?" 

"Yes dad, it is safe." 

"How do you want to tie her up; across the bed, or to the headboard?" 

"There's an easier way to do this. Take her car keys from her pocketbook. Don't let her out of the house for 30 minutes after I leave. I will drive Rod to the airport. She has seen me drive. She knows she will never catch me. We will be in the air before she gets to the airport." 

"Bastard." 

"That's close, but it's not $10. 

Friday Morning 

Rod walked up to me with a big smile on his face. "I got the same clerk as the last two times I went there." 

She looked at me and said, "Oh no, not another one." 

I laughed. "Where were you Wednesday, when I filed the last one? She didn't know if I was kidding or not. I paid the fee, watched her file it into the computer, and you are all set my friend. Patent pending as of 9:18 AM Eastern standard Time today. Anyone that files after that time it is out of 'Even Luck'." 

"Thank you Rod, I'm glad that's over. Let's take the paperwork to the bank and put it in the vault. I'll take you to lunch." 

"Lunch; I just had breakfast." 

******* 

Gray took Delicious into his arms and kissed her. "Good morning sweetheart, did you sleep well?" 

"Do you know how much trouble you would have been in if you hadn't walked off that airplane?" 

"Is that a nice way to greet the man that loves you?" 

"I haven't grown up yet, but I'm trying. Trusting a man is hard." 

"Baby I'm never going to hurt you. No, change that, I am going to hurt you. I am going to hurt you while we run. I am going to hurt you when you misbehave. I am never going to hurt you by cheating on you." 

"You just lied to me again. You told me last night you would cheat on me if they let you fly an F-35." 

"Leave it to a woman to remember the one thing a man would do to fly another woman." 

"Why are airplanes always she's?" 

"If you want me to explain that truthfully, I would need a 20 yard head start, because you would catch me, kill me, and then you would really start to hurt me." 

"Give me the PG rated version." 

"Okay, just don't hurt me. Where else can a man hold a woman completely captive in his hands, and have her do exactly what he wants her to do at the instant he wants her to do it. She will respond to the touch of his toes, his fingers, or with a look in his eye. A man has complete control over a woman, while he's the cockpit of an aircraft." 

"Keep your feet on the ground cowboy, because it's not going to happen with me." 

"I don't see wings on you, but you certainly do have a beautiful tail. Let's go buy your running shoes." 

"Do we really have to buy them?" 

"You bet your tail we do." 

"Very funny Gray, we will discuss this at home this evening." 

"We will discuss this at home this evening, only if you have enough strength to talk, after we finished running." 

"I used to say to you, I'm beginning not to like you. The more I get to know you, the more certain of it I am. You are lucky I want to keep you around until I finish the contract. I want to see your eyes bulge out when you read it." 

"Have you started on it yet?" 

"I've been meaning to, but we've been busy. I'll get to it soon." 

"As long as you remember that your 10 years started the day you moved into my room, it's fine with me." 

"My 10 years start when you sign my contract." 

"There is no way in hell I'm agreeing to that. You could procrastinate for five years before you write that contract. It would keep me in limbo for 15 years. That is not going to happen." 

"Okay let's do the King Solomon routine. I have to have the contract ready in 90 days. If it's not ready we revert back to the day I moved into our room. If it is ready it starts on that day. Agreed?" 

"90 days from when?" 

"90 days from today." 

"No, you have been threatening me with that contract since the day you moved into my room. It starts then, or all bets are off." 

"Agreed, you are a pain in the ass, but you negotiate well." 

"I was number one in my graduating class in debate." 

"Dammit Gray is there anything you don't do well?" 

"I decided when I was very young that if it was worth doing you should put all your effort behind it. When I saw you I knew I had to do the same thing with you, even though I knew it would be hard." 

"It looks like you two are going to be a while. If we can exchange car keys, Rod and I are going to the bank. You two are on your own for the rest of the day. Please, no sex in public, I don't want to drive back into Denver to bail you out of jail." 

"I will try to keep her under control Even." 

"You are a real bastard Gray. It's not like I'm the only one involved." 

"Guilty as charged." 

************ 

39. Radio Daze 

Everything was ready. Jennifer and Gordon were not happy that they were not going to be there to see the test. Even explained why he did not want them there. 

Denver's police chief called and gave Even the number of police available for Wednesday morning, thinking it would be too many for such an event. 

Even hired all 216 of them, and reminded the chief of police that they had to be wearing body armor, carrying assault rifles, and their sidearms. They had to carry two other things with them as security measures. 

Rod made arrangements for all the dignitaries to stay at one hotel. It would be easier for them to be picked up in the morning and driven to his home. Every room was guarded during the night. 

In the morning 30 identical black Chevy Tahoe's were lined up at the rear exit of the hotel. All of them would be driven by police officers, and all of them would carry a minimum of four passengers. Only 17 of these vehicles would be carrying the invited guests. 

There was a black canopy erected from the exit door of the hotel to the entrance of each vehicle, blocking the vision of anyone trying to see who was getting into which vehicle. Even Luck was taking no chances with his friends' lives, and those captains of industry he invited to witness this extraordinary test. 

He had a huge tent erected on his property Tuesday. The vehicles could drive through one end, drop off their passengers, continue on, and park further down his property. The only open parts of the tent were for the vehicles to enter and exit. Everything else was blocked from view. 

Music was being played around the property to defeat anyone's chance of listening in to their conversations from a long distance. He had a feeling his property would be under surveillance; he felt it in every bone of his body. 

The police escort was ready to leave at 8 AM. They were ordered to put on their orange vests to verify their identity as members of the escort team. Four men, in police uniforms, tried to escape. They were captured, arrested, and sent to jail. 

They were now told to remove their orange vests and put on the green vests that were in the extra ammo pouches issued to them this morning at the armory. As they put on their green vests, no other men tried to escape. 

Shelby Meil made a phone call to his associates. Three hours after those men were booked into jail, they were in 'FBI' custody on Federal Charges. Somehow, these men got lost in the system. 

A phalanx of police cars took the lead and as soon as they entered Interstate 70, they blocked off and stopped every traffic lane. 

The two Dunbar armored cars that were waiting on the siding moved onto Interstate 70, took the lead, and began the trip to Idaho Springs. 

The convoy of police cars, and suburban vehicles fell in line behind them. There was no traffic in front of them, and no traffic behind them to worry about. They were motoring along at 80 miles an hour and not worrying about getting a speeding ticket. 

As another precaution, Even, at his own expense, had that damn pothole fixed on Spring Gulch Road. He didn't want one of the armored cars to break an axle on the way into his property. 

(Two months later, Rod informed him the county was suing him for making a repair, on county property, without a license or pulling a permit. 

He told Rod to counter-sue the county for the next 6 years of their budget. He had asked for that pothole to be fixed for more than six years, and they ignored him. He told Rod, "It was time to get Even.") 

The armored cars pulled up, one at a time to his front door. Cloaked in black, the heavy items were placed in each of the armored cars and then sealed. Even put his seal across the back doors of the armored cars containing a design that was not reproducible by hand. He reminded the drivers to wear the protective gear. 

When that was done he went to greet his audience. Rod had handed out two copies of the nondisclosure agreements to each person he invited. One was theirs to keep, the other was for Even. He stood at the lectern in front of them and said without a hint of a smile, "You will either sign the documents, or you will leave now." 

Dycke Schneider stood up. "Before we sign anything we have one demand, and if you do not agree, we will all leave." 

Even was not put off by his brusque manner. He was a very wealthy man, and no one to fool around with. 

"What did you have in mind Mr. Schneider?" 

"We have decided to change your test site. We believe you picked a very difficult area, but we wish to be certain you didn't plant anything that would help your system work." 

"I have no problem with that request. Tell the armored car drivers and police where you want them to go, and we will go there." 

Celeste said, "I told you that you are an asshole. He is as honest as the day is long." 

"I hope I can out bid you on this project. I want to shove it up that pretty ass of yours, until it comes out of your mouth." 

Payne hit him. "The only ass you are going to shove anything up is mine. Leave her alone." 

"Still henpecked I see." 

"Still carrying those Michelin's around I see." 

"Kill him Antonia." 

"Why would I kill him when I agree with him?" 

"What do you mean you agree with him?" 

"I've wanted to milk those udders of yours since before Kimberly was born." 

"Philip hit her." 

"When did you think I lost my mind; the day she knocked me out?" 

"Why is everyone so afraid of me?" 

"I'm not." 

"Who the hell are you?" 

"Delicious Luck, but I do not want to take advantage of some old woman." 

Antonia said, "Old woman my ass." 

Father McAuley walked up to Antonia. "You must be the 'Most Holy' Antonia Gennaro. May I shake your hand please?" 

"Of course, Father, how do you know about me?" 

"I have never been so honored in my life. I received a phone call from Cardinal Delphini, the Archbishop of Milan. He told me what a gentle person you are. He gave me his private number. He told me to call him and tell him about your exemplary behavior while you're here. I couldn't understand why he would want me to call, but it would be my honor to do so." 

Antonia turned to Celeste with fire in her eyes. "Did you call him?" 

"No." 

She saw Philip sitting there with a wide smile on his face. 

"Wait until you see what I am going to do to your books, Philip. You are going to be poorer in a church mouse." 

"I have the Cardinal's number too, mini me." 

"I am going to wish more children on you Celeste." 

"I can't have any more children." 

"Why do I have to be right all the time?" 

"You could always wish more children on your mother and father." 

"My parents would kill me for real if that happened." 

I asked, "Any time you have finished arguing we can continue this meeting and go to your test site. If you wish to continue arguing, we can leave you here and the rest of us will go." 

Payne said, "Dycke has finished arguing and is ready to sign the document, if he knows what's good for him." 

Antonia agreed. "Philip is ready to sign also, or I'll break his fingers." 

"Stephano aren't you happy we only argue between ourselves?" 

"That's not exactly true dear; we have a set of triplets we argue with all the time when they get near the Cray. Thank goodness they decided to go to three separate graduate schools. If they had gone to one they would have shut the place down." 

Laura said to her father, "Dad, we've been meaning to talk to you about that." 

"Please, not now, I want to see this test before I die." 

Patti said to her husband, "Neither you nor I will die if they go to the same school. It will be their professors that will run into the ocean and swim across to England and beg for asylum." 

Laura said to her mother, "I've decided not to go for my PhD." 

"Not now dear, there are too many policemen around for me to be acquitted of premeditated murder." 

"You didn't go, why should I? It will be a waste of my time. Besides that, I have a job offer that I'm going to take." 

"I will buy the fucking company before you leave home as a minor." 

"Mom watch your fucking language, there is a priest here." 

"I don't give a damn; you're not leaving home unless you're going to school." 

"We will just see about that mother. I want this job, I was meant for it." 

Stephano called out, "Officers, officers, can I see you for a moment please?" 

"Yes sir, how may we help you?" 

"Would you please search my wife and my daughter for lethal weapons please? If this argument gets any further out of control they may kill each other." 

"Are you serious sir?" 

"I am very experience with both of them sir. Patricia, Laura, what do I say to this nice man?" 

"Do I have to give him my pen dad?" 

"No you can give that to me." 

"Are you carrying your gun Patricia?" 

"Yes." 

"Would you give it to the nice officer please, before I break your hand? Two fingers only please." 

Stephano placed Patricia's gun into the plastic bag. "Officer, she has a federal permit to carry this thing." 

"I'll look at it before I get it back to her, or you. Nice work sir." 

"It's what grownups do when children fight." 

"Stephano you and I are going to be spending an awful lot of time in that room at home." 

"As long as I don't have to look at you through bars for killing our daughter over something as stupid as an argument, I'll deal with it." 

"As for you young lady, keep a civil tongue in your mouth with your mother." 

"If you rewind every word I said to her during the course of our discussion, there was not one word out of line. I wish she were more like the way she said her mother was to her, then the way she is towards us. She doesn't inspire innovation she chokes it out of us. She is afraid of what we might find or do when we work with her precious computer. Well I'm leaving home. If I have to hire an attorney to become emancipated as a 15-year-old I will. She can't keep me away from every computer there is on this planet. I'll do what she is afraid I will do if I am out from under her thumb. I won't take any more of this crap from her dad, I just won't do it." 

"Can we at least talk about this when we get home?" 

"Will you let me leave if I want to?" 

"I can't promise that, but I'll make you a deal. You can stay with your grandfather and Jemma, while we figure out how to work this situation through. There is only one condition, and if you break it I will have every law enforcement agency in this country looking for you. You must not run away while you are staying with them." 

"How long do I have to stay there?" 

"It won't be forever, I promise Laura, I will work this out with your mother." 

Father McAuley asked Stephano for a moment of his time. 

"Mr. Valentino everyone here heard the conversation between your wife and daughter. If you would prefer not to join the group going to the testing site, police cars will return you to the hotel, where we believe you will be more comfortable. We are about to leave, this decision has to be made now I'm afraid." 

"Patricia what do you want to do?" 

"Let's go back to the hotel." 

Laura shouted, "It figures, something new comes along and because she didn't come up with it, it's not worth her time. I'm going to the test site dad, you go with her. I'll meet you back at the hotel." 

Harold Chase said, "Patti, I'll take her with me. What's happened to you; everyone has noticed you've changed. It's like you're not you anymore. Maybe you should see a doctor." 

Those two sentences sent Patti reeling back to the Apple Orchard in upstate New York, where she didn't remember who she was or where she was. Days later she was diagnosed with a slow growing tumor on an artery in her brain. It had threatened to take all the memories away. It had threatened to take all her cognitive functions away, and she would no longer know right from wrong. 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 09



"Stephano call Joyce Nall, and get me an appointment for tomorrow. Harold, would you mind taking Anna and Robert with you?" 

"Not at all Patti, they are like my own children." 

Laura walked over to her mother, and without touching her said, "You are not allowed to get sick to keep me at home." She turned and walked away. 

Patti said, "That certainly was heartfelt." 

Stephano responded, "That was like the young woman I was courting." 

"Don't even joke about that." 

"Who was joking? Do you want me to name the discussion, day or time?" 

"You are supposed to be on my side." 

"There are no sides when it comes to family. We all win or we all lose." 

"Mr. Valentino your car is waiting outside." 

"Thank you father; is there a prayer to make women understand each other better?" 

"I'll pray to the Holy Mother, and ask for her guidance. I hope she helps you and your family. Money can't do anything at a time like this." 

"You are so right, father, you are so right." 

As the Valentino's headed east on Interstate 70, a phalanx of police cars blocked off Interstate 70 for the armored cars to lead the parade westbound. There were two additional vehicles in the group. Delicious and I were each riding in our Q 7's in the front of the convoy headed towards our new destination. I did not bother to ask where it was. It didn't concern me because I knew my transmitters would work. I just wanted to make sure the drivers of the armored vehicles survived what I feared was coming. 

"Even, this is Shelby over." 

"Loud and clear Shelby, go ahead." 

"We are 1 mile behind and 5000 feet above your position. The road is clear in front of you. No unknown vehicles stopped along the side. No suspicious activity along either side of the roadway over." 

"That's great news Shelby. I hope this is just a bad dream of mine. I'd rather be safe than sorry though." 

"It's not like you can't afford it." 

"Jealous?" 

"Do you really want me to answer that question?" 

"Just think of all the diamonds you could have given to your mother." 

"She would have scratched my eyes out with them." 

"That's what we get for being honest." 

******** 

As Interstate 70 made the sweeping turn to the south Shelby shouted, "Two missiles inbound; emergency stop, emergency stop." 

It was too late for the armored car drivers to do anything but brace themselves. Behind them, in the box of the armored car were two extra layers of ceramic protection covered by Kevlar. 

I had anticipated multiple rocket propelled grenade attacks from ground level on these trucks as they passed by an exposed point on the road, but never did I expect an adversary to have access to missiles. At this moment I didn't give a damn. I just wanted the drivers to survive. 

The back of the trucks blew open like wooden sticks. 6-inch cold rolled steel doors disintegrated, and what was in the back of those trucks was gone. The police tried to keep me in my vehicle, but there was no way I was not going to verify these drivers were safe. I had to make sure I had protected them as well as I could. 

The police did not have any trouble opening the drivers' doors. There were no doors to open. The driver of the closest armored car was slumped over the wheel of the remains of his vehicle. He was wearing his bomb suit, protective helmet, and ear protectors, but he was unconscious. 

A police officer gave me thumbs up. This man would survive, and live to spend the money I paid him to carry cement blocks. 

I rushed up to find the driver of the first truck standing outside his vehicle getting out of his bomb suit. I hugged him. 

He said to me, "Mister, they were paying me a lousy $700 a week to get this stuff thrown at me in Iraq. If they want to play this game with you again, I'm your man." 

I wrote down my name, and phone number. I asked him to call me two weeks. I said I might have a more lucrative and less hazardous position available for him and his less fortunate friend behind him. I joked with him and asked how we felt about wearing suits instead of uniforms? 

He just smiled at me. 

We shook hands and parted company. 

I went back to check on the driver of the second armored car. He was awake. 

Police were all around the accident area; accident area my ass. 

I returned to my vehicle. 

"Shelby this is Even, over." 

"Go ahead Even." 

"Were you able to see where the rockets came from?" 

"Of course, they came from behind me. Other than that we are working with air traffic control to try to find something from the area the rockets came from. The problem is it doesn't have to be a drone. It could be a twin-engine, or a single engine aircraft like the one I'm flying now. We will never be able to trace who fired them or from what type of aircraft. We have four other sources who may give us that information. I'm sorry about your radio." 

"Why, what do you think I'm talking to you on? I have another one in Delicious' car. You didn't think I would be stupid enough to put them in the armored cars did you?" 

"Even you are a man of many talents; stupidity is not one of them. You let these people go with one thing we can't charge them with unfortunately: Murder. Attempted murder we have in spades. Let's hope we have enough evidence down there to lead us back to the source." 

"Let me speak to my guests, and make sure they've calmed down and want to continue on to their new site or if they would prefer to go to my old site." 

"Good luck Even, I'll keep watch from up here." 

Traffic was stopped in both directions on the interstate, so my guests were free to walk about as they wished. When I asked for their attention one of them said, "I just received an email that Atomic Systems Limited, out of San Diego. They just filed a patent for the same type product you claim to have Dr. Luck. I guess this test will no longer be necessary." 

"Rod, if you would be so kind. My attorney, Rod Laver, will now pass among you, and show you a photocopy of my patent dated last Friday, at 9:18 AM Eastern Standard Time in Washington DC. Anyone filing a patent after that date is too late and has yet to demonstrate his product. This will be my third demonstration; and my first public demonstration. If you do not wish to continue. the police will take you to your hotel, but you will still be bound by your nondisclosure agreement." 

Celeste asked, "Where did you hide your radio in my car?" 

"I would never hide something so sensitive and so small in your car. The midget, I mean Antonia might've found it." 

Antonia growled. "Even, you just ran out of Luck." 

I called out, "Delicious." 

"Yes dad." 

"Why don't you take the aging Mrs. Gennaro to see if she can help Father McAuley with the two drivers?" 

"Mrs. Gennaro, if you wait right here I'll get you a wheelchair." 

"You and I are going to talk and not with our mouths very soon little girl." 

Gray yelled, "Delicious be good." 

"Gray not now, I'm just beginning to have fun." 

"If you have the type of fun I'm thinking of, you are not going to like the kind of fun I'm going to have with you later." 

Delicious stamped her foot on the ground, and pulled Antonia towards the wreckage. 

"Who is he?" 

"He's my cross to bear." 

"Yours is taller, but mine is beefier. What's your real name?" 

"Delicious is my real name. Please no jokes, I've heard them all." 

"The Doc named you Delicious?" 

"We didn't know we were father and daughter until a little more than a month ago. My mother didn't even break cherry when she tested my dad out for sex. He was very sick when she did it. She put him in just far enough when he came inside her and there I was. She never told him. The only reason we found out was my mom died in a car accident with my grandparents. The people clearing out the house found her diary. It kind of shakes up your life when you find out your uncle is actually your father." 

"Listen Dell, they need us over there like they need another missile. Why don't we sit down and talk. I'll let you in on my introduction to life on the outside." 

************* 

90 minutes later, the wreckers had nearly cleared the Interstate of the wreckage, and soon reopened the highway. The police were getting everyone back into their vehicles, and ready to move on. 

Celeste pulled my arm and asked me what his daughter had done with her midget. 

"I've been looking for Delicious. I sent both of them to help Father McAuley. He's back but neither of them is here. We better check the sides of the road for body parts." 

"You're not being funny Even." 

"It wasn't meant to be funny. Gray had to warn Delicious to be good as she walked away with her. I sent him to look for them, because she does not always listen to him. Okay, they are both alive. Here comes Gray with the two of them in tow." 

"Dad, if you wanted me all you have to do was call. You didn't have to send the goon squad to get me. It makes me look like an errant teenager." 

"You were an errant teenager, no one could find you." 

"I was with an adult; I was not by myself." 

"Are you calling my dwarf an adult? Not even her husband or Cardinal Delphini has the nerve to call her an adult. Give her another 30 years, and then maybe it will happen." 

Antonia was pissed. "Celeste would you tell my boss I have just given myself a 2 million euro per year raise, because of your insult. If he doesn't like it, tell him I quit." 

"You wouldn't leave me if your life depended on it. We live next door to one another, and your mother lives on your other side. Our kids play with each other every day. Where would you go?" 

"How many of your competitors would love to have me on their payroll? Let me think about that for one second. Switzerland has a much better tax environment, and eight or nine multinational corporations that envy everything that you control. I think I could do quite well." 

"Are you threatening me?" 

"You bet your tits I am." 

Celeste cried out as she hugged Antonia, "My little girl is growing up." 

"You see Dell, it works every time." 

"Do you really think it would work with my dad?" 

"My dad hasn't killed me yet, and I've given him grounds to do it." 

********** 

When they reached the Loveland Ski Area, and pulled into the parking lot I could not believe it. When everyone was assembled by the restaurant I asked, "Are you sure you want to do this here? The mountains are much lower here then Republican Mountain, and not as wide." 

Dycke said, "Are you afraid your device will not work here?" 

"Mr. Schneider all I'm trying to do is make this test as hard as possible to show you and the rest of my guests how easily my invention works in the hardest possible conditions. If you don't believe it, you may leave with no hard feelings." 

Celeste said, "Shove it up his ass Even. He is getting much too big for his britches." 

Payne shouted, "Celeste leave his ass alone, it is mine." 

I said to them, "Are you guys sure your friends?" 

"We are the very best of friends Even." 

"It sounds like me and my daughter." 

"Not now dad or your machine could blow up for real this time." 

"That's fine with me; I have another one in your car." 

"Are you out of your mind? That missile could have been aimed at me." 

"Only through the grace of God my dear." 

"You're not being very funny today dad." 

Gray asked, "Isn't it me that normally argues with her?" 

"Yes but sometimes she needs a little harsher tone then you give her." 

"Ladies and gentlemen where would you like me to set up my radios?" 

Philip downloaded a Google map and pointed to an area with grid coordinates on the east side of Monarch Mountain. He put a sensor necklace around my neck so he could track my movements and verify my position. 

I asked if anyone wished to accompany me to verify that I did not do anything along my way to the site to help the test achieve its goal. The Army and Marine Corps members from the Pentagon asked to come along as well as a member of the teams from Boeing and IBM. Twelve police officers were going to accompany us. Then I asked them to select a frequency for me to transmit my message to them. 

They selected an Extremely-Low Frequency (ELF), which is used by submarines to receive messages, while submerged deep under water. They set their receivers to the frequency, while I went to my car and selected it on my transmitter. My voice came through loud and clear. 

It took us 18 minutes to circumnavigate the mountain roads to reach the GPS coordinates given to me by Philip Castronova. 

As a joke I transmitted, "Are we there yet?" 

The Marine Corps Col. doubled over laughing, while the Army Col. Used his satellite phone to verify receipt of my message. 

The Air Force Lieut. Col. at the restaurant said everyone there was laughing at my transmission. They wanted me to transmit a longer sentence, and something a little more befitting such a momentous occasion. 

I repeated my wedding vows to Jennifer. If that wasn't fitting enough for this occasion nothing would be. 

The Air Force Lt. Col. said, "Tell Even to stop that; there isn't a dry eye in the house. He made his point you can come back here now." 

When I arrived back at the restaurant I received a round of applause. After that the questions started. I was prepared for this also. 

Rod went around with the pretzel jar, which was not filled with money, but filled with numbers from 1 to 16. I would take those questions in order of the number drawn. One question and one follow-up, just as the President of the United States does have a press conference. 

The Pentagon drew number 1. Philip drew number 16. Celeste hit him for being so incompetent. 

He kissed her and told her she was on sexual suspension for week. 

Antonia whispered, "I am always available." 

Philip reminded her that Celeste was off limits. 

The first question was handled by the Army Colonel. "What is the range of this new invention of yours?" 

"I have not been able to test that yet. If my mathematical calculations are correct, depending on the amount of power put through, and the size you make the unit, between 350 and 500 nautical miles in all types of terrain." 

"Holy shit." 

"Was that your follow-up?" 

"No, it was just an outburst. How does it work?" 

"The Holy Grail of Science; everyone wants to know 'the how of years of work' can be answered in one simple sentence. It doesn't work that way. I'll give you a synopsis, or we will be here through New Year's Day. 

I stumbled on the answer by putting the wrong heat coefficient into a program I was running through on the way air molecules affected radio transmissions in tunnels and over long distances. My computer went crazy with this new data. Every time I increased the heat by a very small percentage the radio waves bent a little further, until, finally, they met in the middle. I made a small model and transmitted it around lead shielding at a distance of 20 feet. It worked perfectly. I did field tests and it worked the same way. I was stunned." 

"You can't keep this from the military, it is much too important to us." 

"That is your third question, and I will not answer." 

The questions came fast and furious and it only took 90 minutes to go through all of them. Each Corporation wanted control of my patent, and I laughed at all of them. 

"I am keeping 30% of this patent for my family. No one Corporation is allowed to control more than 20% control of this patent. That goes for you Philip and by proxy, my dearest friend Celeste. The remainder of you can fight over it amongst yourselves. The bidding price starts at $500 million per unit. If all the units are not sold in this group, I will put it out to other corporations in three months. This meeting is adjourned." 

The buzz in the room was deafening. I was asking for $35 billion for 70% of my invention. I knew it was worth twice that much in military sales alone. 

Within moments each CEO was on his cell phone arranging board meetings to get approval to spend billions of dollars to purchase as many options as they could. Three people did not have to wait to get approval. Harold Chase was first in line. He handed me a check for $10 Billion. 

Ten Billion for 20% of my invention, Philip Castronova was next, and Payne Schneider was standing with him. 

I asked her why she was buying these options, and not her husband. 

"If Dycke purchases them, he can never sell them. If I purchase them, I can do whatever I want with them." 

I made an announcement to my remaining guests. "Gentlemen, I am sorry to inform you that there are only 10% of my shares remaining. 60% of them have already been sold." 

The chairman of the Boeing Corporation asked me if I would reconsider keeping 30% of my patent. If I would reduce it to 21%, he would purchase the 19% now." 

There was a series of counter offers, even raising the bidding price for the remaining shares. However, each of the bidders needed corporate approval. 

I said to Mr. Stansfield, "Since I am making this accommodation for you I want a check for $10 Billion, for 19 percent of my shares within 24 hours, or our deal is off." 

He agreed without pause. 

I was no longer, barely a billionaire. I was now a multi-billionaire. I called Delicious to my side. "Our next project is looking better all the time." 

"You keep making inventions like this over the next 10 years, and I would say it's a sure thing." 

"Why are you thinking only about my inventions baby; how about Gordon, Gray, and you?" 

"You are in a league of your own dad. I've never heard of anyone like you before." 

"Not even Nicholas Tesla?" 

"Well at least you're better than Edison." 

"What do you think Gordon would do with $6 billion stuffed in his pocket?" 

"I don't know about Gordon, but I would go to a really big bank in an awful hurry. Dad can I have a sports car?" 

Gray tapped her on the shoulder, and said, "NO!" 

"Dammit, who invited you to my party?" 

"If I remember correctly, you did." 

"I am absolutely sure I don't like you." 

"I am positive you will like me even less when we come back from running this evening." 

"We are not going out running again tonight, are we? I had missiles thrown at me today." 

"It's all the more reason to go out tonight. You have to learn how to outrun them." 

"I think I'm beginning to hate you." 

"Trust me, Delicious, as time goes by, you will." 

"Daddy, help me please." 

"Baby you chose him, not me. Either fish or cut bait. Your wedding is next July. Make up your mind before then, because it is a once-in-a-lifetime deal." 

"The divorce rate in this country is 52%. Some of those are Catholics who never remarry." 

"What are you going to do if we are in Space?" 

"I'm going to do to him the same thing Jennifer told me to do to you. Put you both outside the spacecraft, freeze dry you, and him, and watch you float away." 

"Two premeditated murders; what do you think God will do to you? What do you think your mother would think of you?" 

"You don't fight fair dad." 

"I don't have to fight fair. I just have to help you grow up." 

"I'm working on it. It's hard to change from what I was to who I want to be." 

"You'll get their baby, I know you will." 

*********** 

Harold called Stephano. He told him he had reserved a conference room. He wanted a meeting with the two of them now. No excuses will be tolerated. 

Stephano knew Harold, and when he demanded something, he wasn't in any mood to be fooled around with. 

Patti did not want to go, and she was obstinate about it. 

Stephano said, "Dear if I have to throw you over my shoulder, you are coming with me." 

"I am not going Stephano." 

"Remember, you asked for this." 




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 10



Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of Explicit Sexual Activity, There Is A Section In This CHAPTER For You. I will return to my normal writing commitment, when my research materials arrive at the U of M library. This is going to be a STORY, for your reading pleasure," with no more than "FIFTY CHAPTERS." With the exclusion of this section, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novellas. Please remember, this is "A NOVEL."





There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 10



"As usual my dear, you are correct my dear. When I aimed at that tiny hole of yours, I don't believe I have ever been more excited than at any time in my life. When I was buried inside of you, and you were smiling at me, I was the happiest man on the planet. You were and still are amazing in bed. It's not as often as it used to be, but it is still amazing."

"I want you to know I was propositioned tonight by your former protégé."

"I'll kill that bastard before he touches you."

"Would you like to know what he said to me?"

"Should I get my shotgun first?"

"You would still miss him by a mile. He said to me, 'If you were anyone else Julia, I mean anyone else, I would invite you to my room.' That young man would never hurt you even if his life depended on it. I believe he has proved that already."

"You have to make me feel guilty after that bastard pushed me into the pool?"

"He didn't push you into the pool. You stumbled into the pool because you were drunk."

"I haven't had a drink... Oh what's the use, you would protect him with your life also."

"He saved my husband; what would you expect me to do?"

Clark got out of his lounge, kneeled down by his wife's, and kissed her. "I didn't marry you because of your wonderful caboose. I married you because I loved you."

"Do you really think I didn't know that, you idiot. I am madly in love with you too. We wouldn't have lasted this long if we didn't love each other."

"Would you like to go up to our room and see if we can make a little noise of our own?"

"We haven't had a 'nooner' in years; this could be interesting."

"I will try to make it very interesting for you, and hopefully for me."

"I will make sure it's interesting for you, even if it's in my better 'END."

"Oh really, that should make my little old man stand up and notice."

"As I recall, he may be old, but he was never little. Let's go upstairs, and refresh my memory."

That evening the formal dinner was delayed, because two couples were late arriving. Along with their tuxedos and gowns, they were sporting enigmatic smiles, and tired faces. Their guests razzed them throughout the evening, about the dangers of old people having sex during the afternoon.

Fred said, "I know you are not talking about Ms. Julia, Sharon and I. We are all many years younger than the old 'Rooster' who crowed this afternoon. He managed not to have a heart attack, while chasing me. He continued having good fortune when he swam the four feet to the steps of the pool, and climbed out by himself; again without suffering a heart attack or stroke. Being an extremely smart man, our former two-term president decided to go for the trifecta, and took this lovely woman to bed. Surprisingly, he scored one for the home team. He roared like the young lion he was seventy years ago, and everyone within twelve inches of his room heard him, and applauded the fact he had tempted fate three times today, and survived. Ladies and gentlemen, raise your glass to the luckiest person in this room, depending on the way you look at it, Mrs. Julia Atwater."

Everyone in the room was sure this tribute was for the former President. As was the norm for him, Fred turned everything he said around at the last moment, and made it a tribute to Julia Atwater instead. 

The room exploded in laughter and applause. Clarke Atwater was laughing along with them. Julia Atwater was in Fred's arms laughing and thanking him for what he did to her husband.

"Only you, Fred, only you could do that to him and make him laugh. You could see his chest swelling with pride as you spoke about him, and at the very last second you puncture his pride with the perfect pin. You two were meant for one another. Thank goodness you were not a woman, because I would have lost him to you many years ago."

"Julia, you underestimate yourself. You always have. You don't know how many days and months you carried that man on your shoulders because of your strength. They were dark days during his presidency, and because of the position he put me in, I couldn't help him. It was you that got him through those days and nights. I could see it during the press conferences as I watched him looking at you instead of the cameras. Without you he would've fallen apart. I would have given up the bench to help him if I had to, but you were all he needed to survive. You are an extremely formidable woman, and the other side knew not to fuck with you. If they did Superman would have come out of the shadows and given them a beating they would have remembered for a very long time."

"Clark is right when he says you know everything about him. You also know everything about us. Thank you for everything you have done Fred, you have made our dreams come true."

"All but one of them I'm sorry to say, but he would have killed me if I had done that."

"You are incorrigible Fred."

"Can't you see him as president, with another John-John playing underneath his desk? His approval ratings would have been in the high nineties, instead of the middle fifties."

"Why isn't there a little Judge Hastings running around your house, Mister Chief Justice?"

"It was a joint decision. Sharon had my joint in her left hand and a surgical blade in her right hand. She said, 'No More Children', as she threatened to cut my joint off. I agreed instantly."

"Now I know why my husband appointed you to the Supreme Court. Your decisions are made logically, and not based on bias. You will continue to be one of the best appointments he ever made."

"I hope I never make a ruling that gets her upset. She has that surgical blade in her nightstand."

"It wouldn't matter where that knife is Fred; she has you pussy whipped."

"It is a very pretty pussy Julia. I waited a very long time to meet a person of her stature. It was worth every moment."

"You are born romantic. You two better get some sleep tonight; we leave for the airport at 8:30 AM. Your girls will be waiting for you at Andrews at 11 AM. We don't want to keep them waiting too long, do we?"

"Not one second longer than necessary Julia. I can't wait to get them to Barbados. I haven't seen them naked in a long time."

"You are a pervert Fred."

"Let me see; I propositioned you earlier this afternoon. I tell you I want to see my children naked. Now you tell me I am a pervert. What could possibly have given you that idea Julia?"

"Get away from me Fred, it could be contagious."

"You have been to my home in Barbados, and you don't seem any worse for wear. How did you get your security naked?"

"I gave them the choice: either get naked, or get fired. They got naked, and then three of them had to get bald."

"If I was there, I would have volunteered to shave them."

"Go away Fred, or you may kill the former president. I'm getting horny again."

"On that note, I will wish you good night, and I will meet you at the limousine in the morning."

"Good night pervert.

"That's Chief Justice 'pervert' to you madam."

Julia Atwater landed her Gulfstream 550 at the Andrews Air Force Base as a VIP, because of her husband. She began the long trip from the taxiway to the base operations center nearly 3 miles away.

In the operation center, two sets of identical twins were being fawned over by the young military staff. These women were not dressed like the young professionals they were. 

Cindy and Sandy were wearing short shorts that exposed the cheeks of their asses, and tops that hugged their braless breasts.

Danni and Debbie were not to be outdone by their older sisters. They were wearing one-piece spandex outfits, with nothing on underneath. The material dug into the cracks of their asses, the lips of their pussy's, and defined the outline of their supple nipples.

When the sisters saw each other, they couldn't stop laughing and giggling.

The staff couldn't believe what they heard these women talking about.

Cindy asked, "Is there anything new with these drug-resistant infectious diseases?"

"Yes there is sis. If pediatricians don't stop ordering antibiotics everything from a hangnail to a pimple, we are going to lose a generation of young people because the viruses and bacteria we have now are mutating and becoming resistant to almost every antibiotic on the market. We have lost more patients this year due to drug-resistant strains of bugs then we have in the last 10 years. This is going to be a problem of epidemic portions if they don't wise up."

"Great, I'll give you some of my cards, and when you see these same doctors names pop-up, give one to the parents of these patients' that died, and have them call me. I will sue the doctors, and the drug companies for everything they have. Then I will give you a 20% finder's fee."

Debbie smacked her sister on the arm and laughed. "Lawyers, you are all disgraceful and despicable human beings. You are the only group of people on earth that could find a silver lining out of the death of a child."

Cindy put her arms up to protect herself. "We all have to make a living sis."

Debbie screamed, and went into attack mode.

Sandy and Danny stepped in between them. "You two haven't been together for five minutes over the past three months, and already you are at each other's throats. 

Debbie, you have got to learn to take a joke. 

Cindy, you know your sister is very sensitive about the work she does. Why don't you try to give each other a little room when you talk about each other's work?"

"Sandy, she has to learn to grow up. She lives in the real world, and she should be more sensitive to other people's problems. She makes a ton of money, lives in a fancy apartment, and has isolated herself from the people we grew up with. She should know better. She's 32 years old, and no longer the teenager with bubblegum between her ears."

"I never had bubblegum between my ears, it was ice cream."

"Listen to me Doc; you are not doing so badly yourself. The only difference between the two of you is you see the pain and suffering every day. Sandy only sees it after they walk into her office, months after their operations, or their illnesses have subsided. It is not your fault, and it's not hers either. It's the difference in the way your occupations allow you to perceive the outside world."

Over the loudspeaker in the lounge came the message, "Your attention please: The Chief Justice of the Supreme Court is looking for his four truant daughters. If they are not onboard Ms. Julia Atwater's aircraft in the next five minutes, he is going to Barbados without them."

The four girls screamed, and ran for their luggage. It was gone. They were in a panic, when an Air Force Captain walked over to them and said, "Ladies, your luggage is on board the aircraft. They are waiting for you."

They captain received four kisses, and the girls ran towards the exit, out onto the tarmac and stopped. They forgot to ask what airplane they were supposed to go to.

Then they heard their father yell. "You have two minutes left; move your asses girls, and get in here."

There was a group hug at the top of the stairwell. "Hi dad, you don't know how much we've missed you."

"Yes I do, because I have missed each of you just as much. Say hello to Ms. Julia and get buckled up. We're leaving instantly."

As they cleared the door he pushed a button; the stairs retracted into the body of the aircraft. The door closed automatically, and once the green light was on, Fred moved the lever and locked it. He attached the mechanism for the emergency slide, and popped his head into the flight deck. "Everything is ready to go Julia."

Julia said, "Fred, due to new international flight rule guidelines I have to close and lock the door to the flight deck, until we land in Barbados. No one is allowed up here during the flight, except the flight crew. Tell the girls I'm sorry, but I have no choice."

"Julia they are not children anymore. They will understand."

Fred closed the door and heard it being locked and barred from the inside. He turned and walked down the aisle to his seat wearing the biggest grin.

Their flight attendant had called in sick at the last moment, so there was no one on board to serve them. They would have to do it themselves all the way to Barbados.

He thought, "What a shame."

"What are you grinning about Fred?"

"When we get to our cruising altitude you will find out my dear."

"What are you up to Fred?"

"Trust me Sharon, I promise I am going to be up to a lot."

**********

There was a long line of aircraft waiting to take off from Andrews, but it pays to be a former president's wife. The tower cleared her aircraft for a "Short Field Take-Off."

It wasn't a problem for her Gulfstream. She taxied onto the runway at the 7000-foot marker, spooled up the Rolls-Royce engines, released the brakes, and moved like a rocket down the runway. 3500 feet later the nose of the graceful aircraft lifted off the ground. She turned left to proceed out over the Atlantic Ocean, and avoid traffic from Reagan National Airport. As she passed through 17,000 feet the air traffic controllers turned her South and cleared her via a GPS route direct to Barbados at 41,000 feet. As she leveled the aircraft off, she made an announcement to the cabin:

"Hello back there, we are at 41,000 feet going direct to Barbados. Feel free to move around the cabin, and get yourselves something to eat if you are hungry. I will let you know when we begin our dissent. Have Fun!"

Fred stood up and began to undress. Sharon said, "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Exactly, I am going to fuck all of you."

"You can't do that, Julia may come back here."

"Julia told me that there is a new rule. She is not allowed to leave the flight deck, and we are not allowed up there. Now, all of you get naked."

Sandy said "Are you sure this is a good idea dad?"

"If anyone questions me again that person will get it up the ass first."

Debbie groaned. "Oh crap, he looked straight at me when he said that."

"No cupcake, as long as you follow the rules, you get pussy first."

Debbie was naked in an instant.

Fred kissed her and said, "Good girl."

Sharon was the last to get undressed. He asked her what was taking so long.

She laughed, "I have more clothes on then all four of them."

Fred surveyed the pile of clothes the girls took off, and then the neatly folded clothes his wife had taken off.

"You're right babe. You have three times the amount of clothing on and they did. I think you deserve the prize. Girls put all the seats down into a sleeping position. The button is on the armrest. Lift it up, press the button, and hold it until the chair is flat."

Fred went to the closet and pulled out sheets and pillows to cover the makeshift beds. When he was ready he told Sharon to lie down. She knew what was coming. She smiled, and kissed him.

His daughters looked at him waiting for his next command.

He looked at each of them. "Please don't tell me you forgot what to do for your mother?"

Debbie yelled, "Hell no, I know exactly what I want to do." She dove between her mother's thighs and attacked her slit with a passion."

Sandy screamed, "Hey that was supposed to be mine."

Before she realized her protests had taken too much time, Danni's tiny snatch was attached to her mother's mouth, Cindy's mouth was attached to her mother's left breast, and her mother's hand was inside her pussy. There was only one option left for Sandy.

Her senses returned and she took her mother's right breast into her mouth and placed her hand against her clit. Within moments she forgot about her protests, and loved where she was.

Now it was Fred's turn to join the party. He crouched down behind Debbie, and lifted her hips enough to wet the head of his prick. She stopped what she was doing to see what he was doing.

"Little girl, if I were you I would continue what you were doing, otherwise I might miss my target."

Debbie's mouth formed a vacuum around her mother's pussy, and her tongue ravaged her mother's birth canal.

Fred said to his youngest, "This one's for you little one, it's been a long time for us."

With one steady push he sent his entire length inside his youngest daughter. With every inch he heard her keening, as if she was being put onto a spit, to be turned and roasted."

As she felt his hips touch her ass, she was able to relax. She removed her mouth from her mother's vagina and said, "God dad that felt great, would you do again, please?"

Fred was not going to argue with a woman in need. He withdrew himself as slowly as he inserted himself into her. He felt her trying to keep him trapped inside her velvet tunnel by using every muscle in her vagina. There was a pop when the head of his penis broke free of her.

He bent over her, kissed her neck, grabbed her breasts, and told her to put her mouth where it belonged. His prick had a mind of its own as it closed in on its target. It needed no help at all. His hips flexed forward, and it slid inside her about an inch.

"Fuck dad, I've missed you."

He didn't move slowly this time, and his little one's cries came faster. As he bottomed out, his hips flexed backward and he pounded forward with all his strength. On the second stroke she forced herself back against him, as she cried out and came. He did not relent pushing himself into her, with his steady forceful strokes. She did not stop forcing her body back against his raging dick on every counter-stroke. 

She screamed, "Daddy, I love you," as she came for the second time. 

He did not stop probing her depths, and she did not relent in her backward movements.

"Can I turn over dad; I want to look at you."

He twisted her legs around hard. Her hips and torso were forced to follow the movement of her lower body.

She grabbed his neck and hooked her legs around his hips. "I love you daddy, I've missed you so much."

He lifted Debbie up, while he continued to pound himself into her. They looked deep into each other's eyes as lovers always do.

"I'm close dad, very close. Please give it to me, don't let me cum alone."

"There is no way in hell I am going to let you cum alone baby girl. I'm right there with you; are you ready?"

"Go harder daddy; go harder, punish me, I'm almost there."

Fred pounded into his baby as hard, and as long as he could, but finally he said, "I can't hold it any more, I'm going to cum baby girl; here it is."

"Thank you daddy, thank you, here I go, there I go. Oh daddy, I love you so much. I will never leave you. I will never love anyone the way I love you. I can feel you. I can feel you cumming inside me. It feels so hot, and so good, to feel you cum inside me again."

"You're right little girl, it has been far too long. We must get together more often. I love you too much to let us go this long."

Debbie laid her head against on her father's chest and closed her eyes in peaceful bliss. He carried her to the rear of the aircraft and lay her down on the chair-bed. He put a pillow under her head, and covered her with a blanket. He knew she would be asleep in moments. He would kill to be able to join her, but four sets of eyes were looking at him. 

Each of them was wondering who he would choose next. By rights they should already know, because he never varied his selection process. It wouldn't be fair to any of them, because he loved them equally. He loved their mother more.

He slid between his wife's thighs, kissed her pussy, nibbled at her clit, licked her belly button, sucked both nipples, and kissed her passionately.

"Have our children treated you well dear?"

"Oh yes, if I cum one more time, my insides will be on my outside."

"Does that mean I can steal one more of them away from you?"

"Yes you may. If you treat her the way you treated Debbie, you will ruin her for every other man."

"I assure you it is intentional. I love them more than any other man on this planet ever will. I paid $500,000.00 to keep all of you safe for the rest of your lives. I don't know any other man who would do that for strange women, and at the very beginning of our romance madam, you were very strange."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 10



"If you keep that up Mr. Hastings, you are going to die, before you anesthetize my second baby."

"That is Mr. Chief Justice Hastings to you madam."

"You better hope we never go to Florida."

"Why is that dear?"

"They have that really stupid law there: 'Stand Your Ground!' I could send you out for milk, and when you come home I could shoot you and tell police you looked like a burglar. I would get off, free as a bird, because I was in fear of my life. Have you ever heard of anything as stupid as that?"

"I can't answer that, because it is due before the court within the next two years. I do not wish to show any prejudice either way."

"You are so full of shit Fred."

"Thank you for those words of wisdom. I am ready to take my next daughter for a trip around the world. Can the three of you children guess which one it is?"

Unanimously they said, "It's me."

"You better think harder, or two people are going to wind up with red behind's."

Instantly they changed their minds. "It's Danni."

"Very good; why is it Danni?"

Sandy said, "You are very predictable dad. If you start with the oldest, you work your way to the youngest. If you start with the youngest, you work your way to the oldest. If you start in the middle, it depends on if it's the middle youngest, or the middle oldest."

"Very good Sandy, you have been paying attention to my work ethic. I am very proud of you. You will get laid last, but you will get it in the ass first."

"Gee dad thanks a lot. I will look forward to that immensely."

"I knew you would."

"Cindy, Sandy, make sure your mother does not get cold. Why don't you and I get reacquainted Danni?"

"It will be my pleasure dad. I will do anything you want, anything at all. That's how much I missed you."

"You know how terribly I could treat you because of that one word, don't you?"

"I don't care, as long as you are with me. I will take any punishment, any form of lovemaking, anything at all, except rejection."

"Come with me Doctor, I think you need an injection, possibly several of them."

"Are you going to throw me out of the aircraft?"

"Did you want me to?"

"Not particularly, but I said 'Anything' and I would not look forward to that particular thing."

"Come here, now."

Danni jumped into his arms, and kissed him ravenously.

"Do you want to make love to me; or do you want me to make love to you?"

"I need you dad. Debbie and I take care of each other all the time. I need a man, a real man to take care of me."

"You will have to find someone to take my place soon enough my love."

"Maybe, but before I even think about doing that, I will put you on an exercise program, feed you supplements, vitamins, and minerals every day. I doubt it will ever come to this; but I will give you pills that will keep you erect all day and night, and with a big smile on your face. You may go to your grave one day, but you will go there with your wife's and daughters sex fluids all over your body."

"You know what they say little one, "What a way to go."

"All of us, including mom, want to make sure that you are the happiest man who ever lived, dad, because of what you did for us."

"I accept your prescription for my life's punishment, Doctor. Lie down Danielle and dream about your first time with me. Remember how frightened you were that evening, and how glorious everything has been for you since. I'm going to try to re-create our first time together."

"Oh dad, if I even thought about that, I would have had Debbie implant a new cherry for you to pierce."

"I took all of your cherries once. A man has no right to expect more. Give me your feet, close your eyes, and begin to dream."

He kissed the soles of her feet, and worked up the insides of her thighs.

"That's not the way we started dad."

"I know baby. Two of my children are taking care of their mother, and one is sleeping off the aftereffects of multiple orgasms. Before I took your virginity, the three of them heated you up, until you were ready for me. I told you to dream, not to criticize. Would you like me to stop?"

"If you stop dad, I will cry for the rest of our vacation."

"Then listen to your father, your lover, your protector, and your best friend: Dream."

Danni knew everything he said was true. He was all of those things to her and her family. She closed her eyes and dreamed about their first day together.

Her mind drifted into the past, but her body stayed with her father in the present. It reacted to his every touch; the kiss of his lips, and the lick his tongue. Her vagina was overflowing with honey, which Fred vacuumed out with his greedy mouth. 

Danni was so in tune with him, she came instantly, and continuously. It almost brought her to the point of hyperventilating.

Fred stopped, and gave her a little time to recover. He picked her up, and her head rolled from side to side, as if she were unconscious. He adjusted the bed to an incline position, and sat down. He placed her on his lap, as they did that very first time. None of his other daughters asked for this position, only this precious one. This made it special for both of them. He placed her thighs outside of his and aligned his dick inside the folds of her vagina. Danni's head rested comfortably on his chest, with her mind floating in the distant past, when she was an 18 years old virgin, and her dad took her virginity painlessly. She didn't even know when it happened, but was extremely happy when her sisters told her to look down. When she did, she saw that Fred was buried deep inside her. She could not believe it. 

The past and the present suddenly collided when she felt her father's 'Thing' sliding between the lips of her labia, and torturing her clitoris. She came explosively, and her eyes popped open. Shocked out of her dream, she opened her eyes, and looked into the loving eyes of her father.

"Welcome back."

"You are the most evil men I know. You could have killed me while I was dreaming."

"Did you enjoy your wake-up call?"

"You planned it this way?"

"Do I ever leave anything to chance, when it comes to my family?"

"Can we discuss this later?"

"We can Danni, but only if you want to waste time while we are in Barbados?"

"Love me daddy, make love to me, I want you inside me now."

Without another word, or a wasted motion, Fred slipped his overly ready penis completely inside his daughter's vagina and stopped.

Danni closed her eyes tightly, took a deep breath, and held it for several moments, before she let it out.

"Now I know why Debbie made so much noise. I am going to have to buy bigger toys daddy. You took my breath away."

"I have a much better idea. You live a little more than an hour away from us. We could come to visit you on the weekends, or you could come to visit us. I know you have other obligations, but going three and four months without seeing each other is nonsense. If I can get away for a weekend or two every month, so can you."

"Debbie and I don't have the money to open our own office yet dad. We're still attached to the hospital, and we don't know when they are going to schedule us for weekend duty until a few days before."

"We will talk about this later."

They were looking into each other's eyes, and Danni knew she had to start moving. This is the way it was her first time, when he took her virginity, without pain. Her dad stayed deep inside her, and waited for her to make the first move to make sure he didn't hurt her. He was waiting for her to do it again. 

She moved her hips tentatively, and it felt as if they were stuck together, because she was so small and tight deep inside. Her toys did not penetrate her pussy as deep as her father did. She tried again, but his dick did not budge.

"Fuck, this is going to hurt dad."

"Do you love me little girl?"

"I love you with my whole heart daddy."

"Do you trust me Danni?"

"Yes, but you are the most evil man I know. What black magic are you going to try on me now?"

"You said I was evil already. Would you like this evil bold man to help you get moving?"

"Yes daddy, please help me. I know this is going to hurt like hell, because you are so big, and deep inside me, while I am too tight and dry."

"When you were 18 years old I told you I was not going to hurt you, and I kept my promise. Now you are 31. Again I am promising that you are not going to be in pain when we start making love."

"If anyone else said that to me I would laugh, and tell them they were lying. It's you daddy, and you have never lied to any of us. We love you; I love you more than I can ever tell you or show you. Help me please."

"Thank you baby, it's time for you to go back to dreamland. Try to remember what happened the morning after I took your virginity, and you slept with me all night."

Danni closed her eyes and thought back to that Sunday morning, waking up for the first time in his bed. She was no longer a virgin. She was with a man, naked and happy. She was thinking about the way that wonderful man treated her, and did not hurt her when he added her maidenhead to the number of those he collected from her sisters. He was wonderful, and she had more orgasms then she could count. When he told her to get out of bed, and wake up her sisters, he smacked her on the butt.

She yelped. "What was that for?" 

He laughed at her. "You should never wave something so pretty in a man's face before breakfast. You could wind up being eaten by mistake."

She remembered turning beet red as she ran out of his bedroom laughing.

******* 

Fred was using his hands to stimulate her clitoris and his mouth to excite her nipples. It took a little time, but soon he could feel the muscles inside her vagina start pulsing.

She was still too tight for him to move, without hurting her so he moved his hand from her breast to her little star, and began playing around its edges.

Immediately upon contact, Danni moaned and moved her hips away from the intruder.

Fred started to play a musical score against her anus. It started out at four beats per measure, and her vagina started produce honey, as her hips moved in rhythm to his fingers playing around her asshole. 

As he felt the heat and the viscous fluid in her vagina build up, he increased the tempo to eight beats per measure, and Danni's hips went into doubletime. She was secreting fluids as if she were in the middle of a vicious tropical storm.

She exploded, and her eyes popped open, just as her dream ended. Her body was moving to her father's beating fingers, against her asshole.

She grabbed him around the neck and pulled his mouth down to hers so she could kiss him. "I knew you were evil, but I did not know you could conduct an orchestra." Her mouth covered his, and then his chest. It was a much easier reach because of their height difference.

"Thank you dad, I thought we were going to be stuck together forever. I would not have cared, but the girls would have killed me, and cut me to pieces, just to get to you."

All Fred did was laugh and continue to make love to his youngest child.

They were going at top speed, grinding their bodies together, while looking into each other's eyes with love and lust. 

Danni saw her father nod his head, but did not think anything of it, until two mouths enveloped her breasts, and two hands attacked her pussy.

She screamed, "You Bitches" as she flooded her father's manhood, and the sheets below him. 

She clenched the muscles of her vagina on her father's penis, until movement was nearly impossible. 

Fred screamed, "You Bitch," as he flooded the inside of her womb with a torrent of his semen.

When they had sufficiently recovered, they looked at each other and laughed.

"I thought I had you, when I saw your sisters behind you baby."

"You forgot one thing daddy, "Hell Hath No Fury as Woman Who Is Fucked With."

"I don't believe I've ever heard it quoted exactly that way before, short stuff."

"You promised not to call me that any more dad."

"I was just doing a memory check; you passed."

"You should check Cindi; she is the only one of your daughters with a deficient memory."

Danni screamed as someone slapped her bare ass. She turned around, and her three sisters were standing there, looking angelic. She hopped off her father's lap, stood in front of Cindi, and said, "Let me see your hands, before I cut them off." 

Cindi showed her hands to her sister. There was no sign of redness, which would have proven she was the guilty party."

She asked Sandy to do the same thing, and the results were the same: Innocent."

She looked at her twin, and said, "It was you?"

"It wasn't me."

"It has to be you, let me see your hands."

"No. You will either believe me or not, but it wasn't me. I swear it."

Debbie didn't swear unless she was telling the truth. 

"I believe you, but if the three of you didn't hit me, who did?"

The three girls moved apart, and there was he mother laying down on one of the beds resting.

"Mom, it was you?"

"The next time you call one of my daughters mentally deficient; it will not be me that hits you. Do you remember the times your father had to punish you for your infractions at home? Do you remember how much you enjoyed sitting down to dinner afterwards? Do you want me to speak to the most evil person any of us has ever known in our time here on earth, and have him 'TALK' to you as he did back then?"

"No thank you mom, I will pass on those discussions. My ass remembers that belt too well for repeat visitations. I apologize for my inappropriate remark Cindi. If you ever run out of Ice Cream, I will drive down from Baltimore and bring you some."

"It will be melted by the time you get there."

"I guess you have never seen us transport frozen bodies. I'll put the ice cream in with one of them."

"Oh yuck, that's gross."

"The ice cream will still be frozen, and the cadaver will not have eaten any of it."

"Stop it Danni, before I throw up on you."

"Would you like your ice cream liquid or frozen Cindy?"

"Send me a 'Fruit gram' instead."

"Those things are expensive. Ice Cream is less than $10, those fruit things are like $70 or more. I'll send you a bag of the Peanut M&M's?"

"No, but I will take the Almond M&M's."

"Fuck, I can tell you are a lawyer, nothing but the best."

"Is it a deal or not?"

"Yes, it's a deal."

"Don't you like how they have grown up dear? No more fist fights, or bloody faces. They used their brains to settle an argument, and gave you time to recharge your batteries to screw Cindi. Wasn't that nice of your children?"

"Yes, but I liked the thought of seeing their asses lined up over the end of our bed, with me standing there with my belt in my hand, and you waiting with a bottle of lotion in yours. I get to bring them to orgasm with pain, while you bring them to orgasm with pleasure. What wonderful parents we are."

"Yes we are Fred. What other family can boast they have two attorneys, and two doctors as their children, and we didn't have to kill the rest of our offspring for underachieving."

"Mom, you are getting as bad as he is."

"It's all in the sex dear. He has me brainwashed, because you four don't come around often enough to keep his libido in check."

"Why don't you jerk him off 6 or 7 times a day?"

"Why do you want to punish me?"

"You haven't changed either mom."

"I hope never to change in that department. He made love to two of you so far on this trip. Both of you have had multiple orgasms, and fallen asleep afterwards. Cindi's tongue is hanging out because she is next; and Sandy's panties are probably soaked. I am fortunate to have my husband in bed with me every night. When I go out in the morning, and people see me smiling, they don't ask me why anymore. They know. Your Uncle Clarke thinks we are sex addicts. Maybe we are, but we are not hurting anyone, and we are enjoying our lives immensely."

"You two wonder why we cannot find men we can fall in love with. Dad, please come to Johns Hopkins; we have a great 'Cloning Program' there. I want you to volunteer a part of your anatomy, which will advance the program at least 20 years. You can 'CUM' peacefully, or the four of us will help you volunteer. It will only hurt while they remove your left testicle. They will remove the right testicle seconds before you pass away. That one won't hurt a bit."

"Sharon would you please open the aircraft's door; I think I want to get out here."

"Okay Fred, just watch out for that first step, I hear it's a big one."

"Very funny dear; what I didn't tell you was I am taking you with me."

"Can we make love on the way down?"

"It will be a little windy, but I don't see why not."

"Do you see what I mean children? That is the kind of attitude all men should have. Make love anytime, anywhere, and under any conditions. That man would be like your dad. Don't bend down, because he will be in you before you know it. Never anticipate taking a shower alone, it will never happen unless you have him tied up, or he is in another country. If your man loves you, like Fred loves me, never anticipate leaving on time. You have to undress to get dressed, and that is when the trouble begins."

"If its trouble mom, why are you smiling?"

"Your father makes it the kind of trouble I like the best."

"You are as bad as he is."

"Girls, you have never seen your mother in action. She is more inventive than I am in bed. I was taught by the very best, before I was privileged to meet all of you. Now, as I said the first day I met Sandy and Cindi, the time for talking is over, and it is time for action. Cindi, you are with me. Ladies, your mother has needs; I want to hear her scream."

"Yes dad."

Fred made love to Cindi, and then to Sandy, just as he did on the first day they met at the hotel in Philadelphia. They were virgins when they first met him, but not when they departed two days later. They enjoyed making love with their father, just as their younger sisters did. They had been making love with both their parents for more than 13 years, and every time they did, it always seemed better than the time before.

They lived much closer to their parents then Danni and Debbie did, and they were remiss in going home to visit them. After their father had made passionate, sweet, and tender love to them, they asked themselves why they stayed away so long. They could not come up with a satisfactory answer. They promised themselves it would never happen again.

"There is one thing I missed doing on this trip so far, and I miss it greatly. I think I'm going to beat all our children with my hand. Girls bend over the chairs; it's time for 20 smack across your ass. The Chief Justice of the United States Supreme Court has dictated this punishment because you are all too beautiful."

"You forget one thing darling; I am the wife of the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, and I have just come up with a different recommendation. Ladies, kill him."

Almost in chorus, they replied, "We are doing our best mom. We are trying to fuck him to death."

"It will not work," she said. "I've been trying to do that since he signed all his documents into our names. All those years of abstinence have left him as a permanent teenager in the sex department; everything but the pimples. He has enough youthful hormones in him, to last him into the 24th century."

Debbie moaned feebly, "We feel so terrible about that mom."

Sharon smacked her arm. "You could at least stop smiling when you say that."

Fred asked, "How much money do you and Danni need to open your own office, in a prestigious building, with all top line equipment and staff."

"If you are talking about an office with a laboratory, computerized analysis machine and everything that goes with it, dad; we would need between $13 million and $16 million. You don't have that type of money to throw around."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 10



"Should I tell them about our inheritance Sharon?"

"If you do, they will spend every last penny of it at Neiman Marcus and Goodwill."

"That tiny amount of money has been gaining interest and dividends for a bunch of years. I don't think even they could go through $350 million at Goodwill. They would probably have to go to Paris and spend some money there."

"You are lying; no one inherits $350 million dad."

"Who said Cindy was the dumbest one in our group. She is correct. I did not inherit $350 million, I inherited $240 million. I didn't need the money, so I left it in the bank as my great aunt did. She had a knack for making money, and never spent a dime. Even through the recession, I made money. The woman was a genius. Now, do you two want to open your own office, or not?"

"We will pay you back to dad. I promise we will."

"You most certainly will; by lying on your backs, with your legs spread so wide open; my head will be able to kiss your ovaries."

"Your head is bigger than a baby dad!"

"I will decide how I get paid back Missy."

"It will be our pleasure, I think?"

"Hey, what do Sandy and I get out of this?"

"You my darling daughter get your lifetime dream come true. You get a never-ending supply of strawberry ice cream."

"Haagen-Dazs ice cream?"

"Whatever kind your heart desires; you can even change brands anytime you want."

"Yessss!"

"There is one other thing all of you will do for your mother. You will take every Friday off. You can do your rounds, or see your clients, early Friday morning, but you will be at our home in time to help your mother start preparing dinner. 

The house rules are simple: As soon as you put your clothes away, you are naked until you leave Sunday afternoon. Is that clear?"

Debbie, Danni, and Cindy said, "Yes daddy."

Sandy did not say a word.

"What is your problem number 1 daughter?"

"I don't like strawberry ice cream. It freezes all my brain cells." 

"What do you want?"

"I want to run for the Senate, from Maryland. Our home is still listed as my permanent residence. The idiot that holds the seat now can be easily defeated. 16 years from the election date, I will be in a perfect position to run for the presidency."

"Who do you have in mind for your campaign manager?"

"Strawberry ice cream; she is not as dumb as everyone thinks she is, and she looks hot. Noone will see her brain coming at them, while they are looking at her tits."

"You are going to have to do one of two things: Get married, or make up a story that you were raped by your father at a very young age. You were so traumatized by the experience you can't bear the thought of sexual intimacy. Either one of those will do."

"If it's okay with you, I will go with story number two."

"Girls, I'm not going to be here forever. You have to think of your own lives. Your mother and I are very happy together. We want the same thing for you. If you think for one second I will be disappointed, or upset that you have another man in your lives, you are wrong. I want you to be loved every day, the way I love your mother. The lives you are leading now have to be very difficult for you. There has to be someone out there that has made your heart go, 'BING!' I don't want you to settle for some loser. I want you to fall deeply, madly in love, the way I fell in love with your mother. At least open your eyes and take a look."

"That is the problem dad, we have our eyes open, and we are looking. Every time we see someone, or go out with someone, we compare them to you. They wind up lacking in every department. They are not as smart as you, not as funny, not as strong mentally, not anything like you. When we go out with them, we would like to have a conversation, as we used to have with you at our dinner table. All these men want to talk about is what they've seen on YouTube or sports or what's going on in Hollywood. They know I'm a doctor, and they know Sandy's a lawyer. You would think they would try to brain up their conversations with us, but they don't. All the doctors I work with are married. All the lawyers Sandy and Cindy work with are married. We wind up going on dates by referral, and they wind up being disasters. They think because we are in our 30s we are desperate. Dad, we are anything but desperate."

"Do you see what you did to my baby's?"

"Yes I do. I made them strong independent women, who can hold their own with any man, and in any situation. I could not be more proud of any of them if I tried. When we get back, I will get you in contact with Jim Greene. He owes me two presidencies. He will get you one senatorial seat, from Maryland. You're going to have to move home, commute to work, and become active in local politics. Your ass is going to be very busy."

"Yes I remember how hard it was campaigning for Uncle Clark."

"I wasn't talking about campaigning. I was talking about when you disobey my instructions. Every time you do, your ass is going to be very busy."

"Oh shit!"

Her sisters yelled, "Go ahead, we dare you."

"You guys are very funny. I think I'll give you your next gynecological exams free; with my fist."

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOwwwwwwwwwwww," her sisters said in mock fear.

Sandy laughed. "You guys are awful."

After their father made his four children and his wife extremely happy, he was so hungry, his stomach growled. They all had a good laugh, and raided the galley for food. The kids served their parents first, before they began feasting on what the cooks had prepared for them.

They talked and laughed all the way to Barbados. The next three days flew by, as they watched the Sun gloriously rise out of the azure blue ocean, from their beachside home. It was a site they never tired of seeing. 

They roasted in it during the day, playing volleyball, and softball by the clubhouse. As the Sun started to descend into the western skies, they went for a swim, and then inside their beautiful home, for some wonderful sex, while a leg of lamb was roasting in the oven. 

As Fred promised them, today was ass day, and Sandy went first. With her youngest sister's pussy-covering mouth, a mouth on each of her breasts, and fingers playing with her clit and vagina, Sandy barely felt Fred slide his dick into her exit hole.

As he picked up speed, Fred motioned her sisters away, and pulled her up into his lap, Sandy knew for sure how deep he was inside her.

She grabbed him around his neck, and kissed him. "Dad not only are you the sneakiest man in the world, but you are the best ass fucker ever."

"Are you speaking from experience my dear?"

"You know I am not. Cindy and I do have toys that go up there every now and again, when we are extremely horny."

"Do you remember where your parents live?"

"Yes dad and I've been beating myself up about it, since we got on the airplane. I promise you, it will never happen again."

"Good girl, I think I'll let you come now."

"I thought I was responsible for my own orgasms?"

"If that's the way you want it baby, I'll let you go that way." Fred stopped moving, and Sandy's eyes opened wide in fright."

"What are you doing dad?"

"I'm letting you be responsible for your own orgasms."

"It doesn't mean you have to stop moving."

"It also means I don't have to help either."

"Dad, please?"

"Please what; I'm doing what you wanted me to do."

"No you're not, you're not doing anything."

"Isn't that what you wanted? You wanted to be in charge of your own orgasm. You didn't want a mutually enjoyable, sexual episode with your father. You wanted to leave him high and dry. Isn't that right Sandy?"

"You know that's the last thing I would want for you dad. Let's go crazy and fuck like minks."

"I've never seen a mink fuck, but I believe I know what you mean." He put his arms under her thighs, and pulled her off the bed with him. She screamed when her hands nearly slipped from the back of his neck, but he continued to pound his dick up her ass like a piston.

She screamed, "Oh Fuck" as she squirted her fluids all over his belly. He wasn't finished with her yet. He threw her down on the bed and told her to get on her knees. He pulled her hips towards the edge and pushed his cock deep into her with one mighty stroke. This time she flooded the mattress.

He played with her clit as he pounded into her backside. She cried out, "Daddy please stop, I'm too sensitive down there."

Being a good and loving father, Fred pulled his cock out of his daughter, rubbed her behind tenderly. After a time he turned her over.

She said, "Thank you daddy, that was wonderful."

Fred smiled and said, "You're welcome." She thought he was leaning down to kiss her, but at the last possible second, he dove between her thighs and bit her clit."

As she sent a geyser of fluid a foot into the air, she screamed, "You Monster!"

Sharon, Cindi, Danni, and Debbie were lying on the mattresses adjoining Sandy's, and they applauded this unexpected spectacle.

Sharon said, "Girls, I don't believe I have ever seen a fountain that high before. Apparently, your father hit an underground spring."

"You are very funny mom; I nearly pissed myself."

"You mean that wasn't piss? That was an orgasm?"

"You know how evil dad can be. I was so sensitive I thought I was going to die. I thought he was letting me relax. Then he bit my clit, and I exploded. He is not to be trusted, ever."

Her sisters laughed. "Really, are you sure?"

"You three better stop it, before I pee on you."

Fred returned from the bathroom and asked, "Who is playing water sports?"

"Mom is."

"Sharon my dear, I have a feeling one of our daughters just told a fib. You know what happens to little girls who tell fibs in our household don't you?"

"Yes dear, I know what happens to little girls who tell fibs. However we have to see if she will stand up and take her punishment, or if she will fib again and bring punishment down, not only on her, but on her three sisters also. I hope she fibs again, don't you Fred?"

"Being an officer of the court, I can only hope for honesty to prevail. However, I see good people lie in front of me every day, as they try to get out of something bad they did during their lives. It is a stupid thing to do, and only brings grief in the long run. Her sisters will hate her, and her parents will be very disappointed in her, but it is a decision she will have to make, and she will live with the circumstances of that decision, forever."

"How much longer are you guys going to make me feel stupid about saying that?"

Sharon said, "I was looking forward to at least another 5 to 10 minutes Danni."

"Okay, you have fun; I'm going to the bathroom."

"That wasn't nice of her. She fessed up right away. It took all the intrigue out of it."

"You know what they say Sharon. Sometimes you get the bear, and at other times the bear gets you. I guess this was the bear's turn."

"I think I'll check her pussy for teeth, while you fuck her in the ass Fred."

"Don't bite off more than you can chew dear."

"I promise I'm not going to bite anything off, but she's going to think I am."

"No female circumcision dear, we are the wrong religion, and in the wrong country. If they bring your case before me, I'll throw the book at you."

"What book would that be Fred?"

"Either Playboy or Hustler or one of those."

"That's what I thought. Dinner will be ready in 35 minutes. Does that give us enough time to take care of Danni?"

"I believe so. If it's not, we can lay her on the table, next to the leg of lamb, and put the salad in wonderful places and eat it directly off her."

"It is no wonder my uncle put you on the Supreme Court; your mind is priceless."

********

When Julia Atwater picked them up Sunday afternoon, the Sun had turned the six of them black, from head to toe. 

She said, "Next time, I don't care what he says, I am staying with you."

"You tell my chicken shit boss, he has to come down here and stay for a few days. He is as pale as a ghost. He could use a good tan. Wait; I have an idea; girl's line up for a picture for Uncle Clark."

"Fred he will die of embarrassment seeing his grandnieces nude."

"He won't see a thing Julia. It will just be titillating."

"Get out here."

"I am not dressed yet."

"Don't get dress, I have an idea."

"Oh God not another one. What are we doing now Fred?"

"We are taking a picture for your Uncle Clark."

"I am not going to be in it."

Julia said, "Why not, I am." She started to undress before anyone could say a word.

"What do you want me to do Fred?"

"You do realize he is going to come into court and strangle me with his bare hands."

"You can run faster than he can Fred."

"Okay, here we go. Julia, you are facing Sharon, close together. Debbie and Danni, on your knees in front of them, with your arms hiding your breasts. Cindi and Sandy, you lay on the sand, with your hips turned partially towards the camera, but showing nothing, and your hands under your chins. Everyone face me, while I take the pictures. I will make sure nothing shows."

"This looks very nice ladies. Everyone smile, got it. Let me check it too make sure it came out right."

"Very funny Julia, Please cover your breast this time."

"Why he's seen them before."

"I don't want to get arrested for kiddie porn?"

Everyone laughed.

"Okay you spoiled sport. I'll hide the boobs."

"Here we go again; very nice ladies." 

Fred hit the button on his Nikon and took a dozen quick pictures. 

"Okay, we are done. I will print these out when we get home, and send them to you Julia. He should have fun seeing you with my girls. Everyone get dressed, it's almost time to go home."

His girls said,"Booooooo."

"Those are my feelings exactly."

"Print them out on the airplane, Fred. It will be easier that way."

"That sounds wonderful, Julia. Record his reaction for me please. It should be priceless." 

***************

Sharon knew Fred could take care of her every need like no other man could. He proved that to her, night after night, in the privacy of their bedroom. He always pleased her the way she wanted to be pleased. When her girls were not around, he never strayed from her. You could set your watch by him walking through the front door. He rarely stayed at the court to do his work. He would bring armloads of books with him and study them at home. He was the perfect spouse, and he was approaching his 50th birthday. 

It was a double-edged sword for him, and he was not sure what would happen on that day if anything. As always, he prepared himself to the maximum degree possible. He had not heard from his former owners, and did not expect to hear from them now. Appeals were very rarely given to the Chief Justice, except in case of an emergency. 

However, Fred never left anything to chance, ever. He was preparing for every contingency. His freedom date clawed at his mind, but not at his spirit. There were many ways for his owners to contact him over the years, and none of them had tried. He believed he was free, but he was not 100% sure. He wanted to be sure, but he couldn't do it by himself. He needed outside help that could not be traced back to him. 

He thought of Clarke's group of computer experts. Would they be able to break into his father's IRS files to see how he was doing without being noticed? Could he ask any of them without drawing suspicion to himself? This was a conundrum, wrapped in an enigma, hidden in a puzzle in the Sunday London Times.

You are on the clock, and you have five minutes to solve it all, while watching a football game. You must remember, at the end of your five minutes, your exam will include every blocking assignment of the offensive line. It is an impossible task. So stick with the basics, and prepare for the worst, and everything in the middle will take care of itself."

"What's the matter Fred, you were mumbling in your sleep."

"Was I saying that I wanted more pussy?"

"You say that out loud all the time Fred. They are the first words I hear in the morning, and the last words I hear as we hit the bed at night."

"You just lied to me Sharon. While we are making love I tell you how beautiful you are, how lucky I was to find you, and dozens of other things that endear you to me."

"That's true. Tell me what's worrying new."

"Do you remember what I told you the first day we met? The magic year for me was 50. Well guess who turns 50 soon?"

"You haven't heard from them in years. Why would they contact you now?"

"I have no reason to think they will contact me now. It would make no sense of them to do it. That is the reason I think they will. You must be prepared with your story. Don't make any mistakes they will know it better than you do. If they don't come, fine. It's just I have this feeling and I don't like it."

"You could retire from the bench because you are experiencing memory problems."

"I know, but that would break Clarke's heart. I will only do that as a last resort."

"Start going to a neurologist and say you are experiencing headaches. At our ages they will take an MRI and it will show some arthritis building up on the cervical ridges of your spine. They will attribute your headaches to the pressure it is putting on your nerve endings."

"When did you become a doctor?"

"I didn't, I have 2 daughters who are, and they tell me things I don't need to know, sort of."

"I am happy you remembered this. I think I will reward you with a dance."

"Oh no you won't; get away from me and my ass."

"You have such a lovely ass; I have to have it while we are dancing to a Waltz."

"Get away from me Fred; you took my cherry the first time we waltzed. You are evil to the core."

"Yes, I know; isn't it wonderful?"

Sharon grabbed his neck and kissed him. 

"I don't feel like dancing with you Fred. You step all over my feet. I have to take a shower, would you care to join me to see if you can keep it up and in?"

"I will have to check my schedule. I don't think I am due for a shower for thirty days. I will check to see if I have an opening to put it in."

"You don't have to see anything to put it in, Fred. You can use the Braille method, and lubricant. It will open willingly."

"Well, as long as the opening is available; I'll put in the lubricant, and see if the blind monster can find its way home."

**********

44. Happy Birthday

September 30, and he was up at the crack of dawn looking for his presents. He looked in the kitchen, in the living room, the playroom, even in his father's reading room, and he couldn't find one. He was depressed. He walked into the kitchen, and found his mother and father standing by the door.

"Are you looking for something Gordon?"

"I'm five years old today, and I thought I would get some presents."

"Are you having a party this afternoon?"

"Yes I am. Do I have to wait until then to get my presents?"

"You are not supposed to be awake for another two hours, so the wait wouldn't have been that long if you had slept properly."

"I was too excited to sleep. I wanted to know what it felt to be five years old."

"So tell me, how does it feel to be five years old?"

"It's no different than when I was four years old. I thought I would be taller."

"Would you like me to measure you to see if you're right?"

"It doesn't matter, I don't feel taller. Isn't getting older supposed to feel special?"

"It's just another day in your life. It's a celebration of the day I gave birth to you. You only have one birthday, and that's the day you were born."

"So why do they call it a Birthday Party?"

I said to my son, "It's a misuse of the language again Gordon."

"Oh I get it now, so it's not a real birthday party, it's a remembrance of my birth day party."

"That would be an excellent explanation of what is happening today, Gordon. However, if you ever said that to anyone, they would look at you and think you had gone crazy."




There Must Be a Mistake Ch. 10



"Okay dad, this afternoon I am having a birthday party, instead of a remembrance of the day of my birth party."

"That was very well put Gordon, very well put indeed."

I left the tent up for Gordon's party, and had a bounce house, waterslide and other children's amusements brought onto the property. Inside the tent I had small carnival amusements. Water guns that sprayed into openings that made little man climb poles to the top until a winner was declared. All the prizes were huge. No one was leaving with a 2-inch plastic toy.

Rod, Rosalynn, and their horde were first to arrive; followed by Gordon's girlfriends, Danielle and Brandy. For the remainder of the afternoon the three of them were inseparable. We had a total of 25 children at the party, plus at least one parent for each of them. However, the person I loved the most was Jennifer's grandmother, Mrs. Stars. She ordered me to call her Aurora, because she didn't want to feel old. I told her when I got to be her age I wanted to look as youthful as she did today.

I thought it was a compliment, but she said to me, "Even, exactly how old do you think I am?"

Jennifer looked at me and smiled. I was caught in a trap of my own making, and I wasn't about to dig my own grave. After some quick calculations I said to her "Aurora, you can't be a day over 55."

She laughed. "Jennifer you married a very smart man."

"Yes grandma, I know."

I suddenly had an urge to check on my son, and what I found surprised me even more.

In the bounce house were Gordon, Danielle, Brandy, and Delicious holding hands in a circle, jumping up and down like lunatics.

Gray was standing outside looking at them with a smile on his face.

"What is she doing in there?"

"She's acting her age Even. She never had a chance to do this growing up. She always lived in fear. You should hear some of the stories she tells me at night. I can't believe what she went through; and she survived. Your sister was a very strong woman. The only reason Delicious is anywhere near normal is your sister was able to hold her together. If Divine was honest with you, and told you half of what was going on in that household, you would have gone there, and pulled both of them out by their hair, and buried that bastard in concrete."

"She didn't tell me. She kept telling me everything was under control. I would've put that bastard in a wood chipper for hurting her, but she didn't tell me. She probably didn't tell me because she didn't want me to know Delicious was my child. She could have kept that secret forever, if she had come to live with me."

"All we can do now, Even, is to help her grow into a woman. In order to do that, we have to let her be a child for a while. She never went through this phase of her life, and she needs it. I'm going down to Houston next week to file my paperwork. I'm going to take her with me, and take her to Seven Flags and let her have the time of her life. You can't cram a lifetime of childhood memories into one week of fun, but at least she will have some happy childhood memories of her own."

"Take all the time you need Gray, just keep in touch."

"You have to do us a favor Even; if Gordon decides to marry those two little beauties, in the next two weeks, make sure you invite us?"

"Did you see how they latched onto him as soon as they got here?"

"Yes I did, that's why I asked for the wedding invitations."

"We have to get that boy off this planet; it won't be able to handle the population explosion when he hits puberty. Maybe we should test him for pheromones to see if he has anything special?"

"We already know his special. If we add pheromones to that list; he will have to be put in a maximum-security facility, for his own safety."

"Give him a week and he will find a way out."

"Do you really think it would take him that long?"

I yelled, "It's time for you four to get out of there, and drink something. I don't want you to get overheated."

Delicious yelled, "Everyone, backflip!"

You have never seen four more perfect backflips in your life. 

One by one, laughing, they exited the bounce house, took a bottle of water from the ice bucket that was close by, and began to drink it slowly.

Delicious went a different route. She jumped into Gray's arms and kissed him.

"Yuck, you are all sweaty."

"I'm all sweaty when we come back from running and you don't complain."

"That's different, because I'm sweaty too."

"I have to get some water, I'll be right back."

She went to the ice bucket, took a bottle of water, opened it, and took a large swallow. She walked back towards us and asked Gray if he would like some.

"No thank you, I'm fine."

"That's a shame, because it's really good water, and its cold. You should really feel it." With that, she squeezed the bottle and sprayed it all over Gray's head and face. Then Delicious disappeared in a cloud of dust.

I was laughing so hard I was of little immediate help to Gray when he finally was able to see again.

"Where did she go, I'm going to kill her."

"Gray may I remind you of your earlier statement when you said she was acting her age?"

"I can kill that woman at any age. She is infuriating."

"In that case, I would check the shower."

"Why didn't I think of that?"

"You were thinking of a capital crime, instead of getting even. Remember to be back for the cutting of the cake please. You have 45 minutes before I come to look for you. I don't want to wash my eyes out with soap again."

"Message received and understood."

Gray took a pitcher, filled it with ice and water, and went upstairs. He listened at the bathroom door to make sure she was in there. She was, and he smiled.

"God that woman can't sing one note in harmony with the next one." He smiled as he thought, "She does have other attributes that make up for her singing."

Their bedroom door was slightly open, and when he entered he made sure to leave it exactly the way it was. He undressed, and put his clothes neatly away. He put their chair as close to the wall as possible, where the door opened. He stood on it, waiting for her to walk through the opening. He kept thinking of the temperature difference, between the hot shower, she had just finished, and the ice shower and was about to give her.

He smiled. "Revenge is so sweet."

The bathroom door open, and he heard her walking down the hall. He raised the pitcher, high over the doorframe. He was ready to dump it on her, when he heard the wooden chair crack. He looked down just in time to see the chair collapsing underneath him. 

He forgot about the pitcher, as he tried to jump off the chair, in an attempt to keep from being injured. He lost his balance. He fell awkwardly to the floor, and the ice and water from the pitcher poured all over his head, neck, and chest. To add injury to this insult, the pitcher hit him on the right side of his nose, and cheek, leaving him with a small, bleeding wound, and the beginning of a black eye.

Delicious walked into the room with incredible timing. She was able to watch Gray fall in slow motion. She watched as the ice and water pour all over the top of his body. She was laughing so hard, she could not go to his aid. She sat down 3 feet away from him. Gray had the most dejected look on his face, it made her laugh harder.

"Was that meant for me dear? Were you intent on dumping that ice on my head? I guess God got you for that one, didn't he? I believe you're right eye is going to be black and blue, because it is already purple. You poor baby, let me kiss it and make it better."

Whether it was the right or wrong thing to do is up for debate. She approached him, naked, because the towel that covered her had disappeared. She was only going to kiss him to make him feel like less of a fool than he did lying on the floor, soaking wet, next to the broken chair. It didn't quite work out that way 

He was determined to do more than kiss her. 

He kicked the bedroom door closed, grabbed her as she approached him, and tortured her using ice cubes on parts of her body that had her cuming and screaming simultaneously.

She didn't rest idly as he tormented her. She was able to grab handfuls of ice also. His testicles shrunk to the size of peas, during their battles. Gray screamed so loud, Rod heard him outside.

He ran to me and said, "Did you hear that scream; I think she's killing him."

"Yes I did, and no she isn't. They have 10 more minutes of playtime, before they have to be back down here. Everything will be fine, I hope."

"I've never heard a scream like that. I think she may have cut his balls off. Either that or she has them in a death grip and is pulling them out through his asshole."

"She has plans for those things after they get married, Rod. I don't believe she is removing them permanently. He may think so now, but she is just teaching him a lesson about ice and cold water. I believe he will not forget this lesson, and will become an ardent believer in verbal compromise rather than getting even in kind."

"Or in other words she is 'Pussy Whipping' him, without fucking him."

"Very good Rod, you are learning." 

"I was pussy whipped the first night I slept with Roz. I don't think it could have gotten any worse; let me change that; I don't believe it could have gotten any better."

"I feel the same way about Jennifer; I just wish I had met her 10 years ago."

"I forgot to tell you, I got a phone call from your friend, the pilot, Michael. They have him up and walking. It took them six operations to get him there, but he wanted you to know he's looking through books for the airplane you promised him."

"Did he leave you a number where I can reach him?"

"Yes he did; I'll leave it for you before we go home."

"I want you to send him a bill for Rickshaw services 39.7 miles $300. Cooking his meals $200. Listening to him complain for 4 days $1000. Emergency medical services $2500, and wiping his ass, $3 million. That should get a laugh out of him. When he tells you what type of aircraft he wants, make sure the manufacturer puts in everything that possibly can go in it, and it better be top-of-the-line. Tell them the aircraft is going to be flown in Alaska. So the aircraft will need whatever is required, by the FAA, for instrument flight up there.

There is one final thing I want you to do for him. He is going to need flight training on the new airplane. Make sure the trainer is a beautiful woman, who knows how to defend herself. Michael's hands are as fast as lightning, and he is a deviant when a beautiful woman is near him. Tell her we will pay her twice, or three times the going rate, if he really gets out of hand."

"He sounds like a fun guy."

"He was sick as hell in the hospital at Fairbanks. All he kept doing was grabbing the young nurse's asses or breasts every time they passed him by. He was unbelievable. The nurses were getting ready to sedate him, or tie his hands to the railings as he became more and more aggressive."

"At least his spirits were high."

"Yes, and I can guarantee you, he hadn't had a drink in at least four days."

"Very funny Even, your sense of humor is getting better."

"It's time for me to break those two love birds apart. Its time for the children to cut the cake, and for Gordon to open his presents."

"Keep your eyes closed this time."

"I definitely am going to knock on the door harder."

I started walking towards my house, when the front door swung open and Delicious came running out, and into my arms.

"I think he will really kill me this time; protect me daddy."

"What did you do?"

"It wasn't my fault, well not entirely anyhow. He was standing on a chair waiting to dump ice water on my head, when the chair broke. The ice water fell on him. The pitcher fell on his nose, cut it, and left a bruise under his right eye. It is going to turn black and blue. It has started already. 

As we were dressing to come downstairs, he went into the bathroom to put a Band-Aid on his nose to cover the cut. I noticed the laces on his sneakers weren't tied. I told him I would meet him downstairs, and left the room. I lay down on the floor, reached in, and tied two of his shoelaces together. I waited on the steps for him to come out of the bathroom. He took half a step and he fell like a tree. I believe I'm in trouble."

"It's a shame the spaceship isn't ready. I believe outer space is the only place you might be safe now.

"Oh my God, he's coming daddy. He's not smiling."

"Gray before you kill her, may I will remind you one more time of what you said to me earlier."

"Even, the only reason she's not dead already is because of what I said earlier. If I didn't love her so much she would be the beef for the barbecue. She is tender enough, but God Almighty, she is not sweet when she is like this. She has the devil in her today. Come here you little devil."

"Am I going to get hurt?"

"I will promise you that you are going to get hurt. I'm just not going to tell you when."

I said to my daughter, "Remember Delicious, you have until January to make up your mind. If you change your mind after I start putting deposits down for your wedding, two people will want to kill you."

"Daddy, I'm not going to change my mind. Gray is as immature as I am, just in different ways."

"I am not."

"Are you sure you want to get married?"

"I'm positive I want to marry you."

"I think you'd better change your mind in an awful hurry."

"I have the mind of the 16-year-old boy, in a 22-year-old body."

I laughed at my future son. "You haven't been there yet, and you are already pussy whipped."

"It's really disgusting is in it."

"Rod and I were just discussing it. Men just can't win when it comes to women. We can't negotiate with them, because they cry. When they cry we can't stand it. There is a mechanism in our body that turns us to mush. If you go to any major corporation, the head of human services is always a woman. She can hire and fire anyone because she doesn't give a shit if you are a man or a woman. If a man walks into the office and cries, she still says, 'You're fired, clean out your desk, and get the fuck out of here.' She doesn't have a problem with it at all. 

A man gets sick when he is asked to fire woman. He thinks about her family not having food on the table; her inability to pay the mortgage, and all of the things necessary for a decent life. It doesn't work that way if there is a woman in charge. We don't call them coldhearted bitches for nothing."

"Daddy that's not fair, you're making a generalization."

"Delicious, what did you just do to your fiancé?"

"Okay daddy I get your point. I'm sorry Gray, but you are still a 16-year-old in the 22-year-old body."

"And you're still a bitch."

"So I guess were even?"

"No, he is Even."

"Children let's cut the cake, before Gordon tries to impregnate a five and a six-year-old girl at the fifth celebration of his birth."

Delicious said, "WHAT?

"Gordon will explain it to you later."



Gordon's party was a great success. He made several new friends, even though Danielle and Brandy were constantly at his side. Since most of the parents did not know Gordon, they gave him gift cards so he could buy whatever he wanted, which we thought was a wonderful idea. Everyone exchanged phone numbers so the kids could get together and have play dates.

After everyone went home, the crews took down and removed the amusement rides, games, and toys from the property. The only thing left standing was the massive tent, and Rod would make arrangements for that to be removed in a few days.

Gordon approached me with an unhappy look on his face.

"Dad have I been bad?"

"What would make you think you've been bad? I have never met a child that is better behaved than you are. I am so happy, and so proud that you are my son, I would go on top of the highest mountain and scream your name so everybody would know that you belong to me."

"If I've been good, why didn't you get me a present?"

"Is that what you think; I didn't buy you a present on the date we are celebrating your birth? Do you think I would be that cruel to you? If you were bad for one or two days, it wouldn't matter to me, because you are still my son. You will always be my son. I will always buy you a present on this festive day. Your present is in the lab waiting for you to unwrap it"

His eyes opened wide, the smile returned to his face, and he jumped into my arms, all five years old of him. "Can I unwrap it now dad?"

"Can I think about that for a minute?"

"No."

"Then I think we are going to have to go down into the lab and unwrap your present."

He wiggled out of my arms grabbed my hand, and pulled me towards the house.

"Come on dad, don't be a slow polk."

Everyone was downstairs waiting for him to arrive. Jennifer had a camera in her hand. Gray had a video camera rolling, and Delicious was taking pictures on her cell phone.

"Dad why is everybody taking pictures of me?"

"They want to see what a five-year-old Gordon looks like, standing next to a brand-new Gordon."

"You bought me a robot?"

"No, this is bigger than a robot, but I think you could use it to make a robot. Why don't look by Sequoia, because that's where your present is."

He ran around the tables and 4 feet to the left of Sequoia draped in black was an object equal in size to that computer.

"It's very big dad. How am I supposed to unwrap it?"

"Come over here Gordon. Wait until everyone with the cameras tells you they are ready, and then pull on this rope."

Jennifer said, "Okay Gordon, when I say three: One, two, three."

Gordon pulled on the rope and the black shroud fell to the floor. Standing in front of him was a brand a new Sequoia computer, with his name emblazoned on the glass door. It said, "GORDON 2: Searching for our new home."

You have never seen a 4-foot tall child jump high enough to dunk a basketball until today. Gordon could have done it, with room to spare.

"Do you feel taller now Gordon?"

"I think I can touch the stars dad. Can I ask you a question?"

"I believe you just did, but go ahead."

"How did you get all this big stuff down here?"

"If I tell you, then Delicious will know, and you know girls can't keep a secret." (I shouldn't have said that with Jennifer standing beside me, because I got hit.)

"Dear, you are not a girl, you're a woman. There is a vast difference."

"Mister Luck, you are not getting away with it that easily. Say it again and you will be eating my shoes."

Delicious yelled, "You tell him Jen."

"I have an elevator."

"Dad, this wouldn't fit in your elevator."

"No not that elevator, you want to see the big elevator?"

"Yes please."

"Gray would you give me a hand please?" We moved a table that was against a wall that contained manuals and schematics.

"Everyone please stay clear of this area; I have to go upstairs for a moment, but I will be right back."

A moment later they heard a clicking sound, and electric motors humming. Suddenly, the ceiling of the area I asked them to stay clear of started moving down. When it rested on the basement floor, and they saw me standing by my bookcases holding a specific set of books down, and my foot on a lever by the floor, they were amazed.

Delicious said, "You son of a bitch."

"That will be $10 please. Do you like my elevator Gordon?"

"Dad you are so cool."

"Do I have to tell you not to touch anything in my den, or tell anybody about it?"

"Tell anybody about what dad?"

"Very good son, very good."

"Now for the hard part; Delicious did you see anything today?"

"Of course I did; I saw Gordon making out with two beautiful girls, weren't you Gordon?"

"What is making out?"

Jennifer said, "Delicious, if you say one word you won't have hair anywhere tomorrow morning."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 11



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual material, this story is not for you. There will be some scenes included, but they will be evocative rather than aggressive, and not just for the sake of sex itself. I hope you will join me on this journey, until it reaches its inevitable end. P_D10

46. The News Conference

President Atwater finished making his opening remarks. His press secretary had to act like a traffic cop to keep the reporters at bay. He told them if they did not act more civilly towards the guests on the podium and towards each other; this news conference would end, and the only information given out would be on a news release.

A reporter from the largest news conglomerate was given the first question.

"Mr. President, why didn't you do this while you were in office? You said it could be done relatively cheaply. The government never does anything cheaply."

"I am only the administrative head of our organization. I am also putting a great deal of my fortune into this venture. The reason it was not done while I was in office is the person who invented the process of negating Earth's gravity had not completed the testing phase, and was not ready to announce it to the world. When it was ready, if it was offered it to any government, they would attempt to take it, or not offer fair compensation for what the discovery was truly worth.

What amount of money would you offer a person, who could take you to Mars in one hour, instead of 46 days? The United States is spending $1 trillion to get us to Mars by building a new rocket, and a new capsule called Orion. We are going to spend between $270-$350 billion to send between 60 and 80 people on a voyage to the stars.

You recognize these people behind me. Each of them has made their fortunes, either by using their brains. They are not fools, or people willing to part with their money foolishly. Some of them are sending their children on this voyage. Do you think any parent would send their child on a voyage where death was an absolute? Everything has been considered: from the engines; to hovering at a height of a few hundred feet to check their systems, to landing again if they find a flaw. If Challenger had that opportunity, those wonderful astronauts would still be among us.

A police helicopter roared overhead, and landed behind the clubhouse. No one gave it a second thought.

The second question was given to a local television station.

"How will we know these people will actually be going to the stars, and not hiding in the outback of Australia?"

The President said, "I am going to let Dr. Even Luck answer that question."

"Thank you Mr. President. When we take off everything will be folded against the exterior surface of our craft to make it as aerodynamic as possible. When we leave Earth's gravitational field, we are going to extend our outriggers, and deploy our telescopes, cameras, and antennas. We will begin broadcasting live to earth. These views will be both frontal and rearward to show you where we are going and where we have been. You better keep your eyes fastened to the screen, because we will be picking up speed rapidly. Initially we will be traveling at about more than 16,000 mph. As soon as we complete this process, we will be increasing speed at a rate you will not believe it. We will be passing Mars in one hour, at one quarter the speed of light; 46,500 feet per second. When we pass Jupiter we will be traveling at nearly 80% the speed of light, 149,800 feet per second. Then the fun begins, because if we do not reach at least .9 the speed of light, we are going to return home, because we will never reach the next star system.

We will have two engines to deploy at that time: our nuclear engine, and our Ion/H2 engine. I have promised my investors a minimum of 400 patents to come from the research and development of this craft. We have already given them one. Two more will be filed within the next day or so; and we have not put pen to paper yet. These marvelous people have already put $100 million each into the bank. They have not seen a contract protecting their money, or themselves from future liability. That's how much they believe in this project."

From the side of the stage a man asked, "Am I too late Dr. Luck?"

I looked over to the side of the stage, and standing there was William Zabo; Patricia Parent Valentino's father."

"Please join us Mr. Zabo; you could never be late."

Laura, Robert, and Anna Valentino ran to greet their grandfather.

After kissing each of them, he took a seat next to Patti and Stephano, and both greeted him warmly. Many of our other guests did also. They knew him, either through joint transactions with their businesses or by meetings with him around the world. They also knew he played both sides of the law, and treated him very carefully because of it.

I announced his presence, and there was a rumble that passed through the press corps. They knew his name, and the power he wielded in Washington and around the world.

I now had eight extremely wealthy investors for my plan to go to another solar system. However, with the addition of William Zabo, others would follow like water flowing downstream. With each new investor the amount of money they would have to contribute would decrease, but so would their net gain at the end. I was not sure what was more important to them. I would ask them later if they wanted me to limit the amount of investors, or take as many as could afford to join us. It would be their choice, because it was their money as well as mine.

As the press conference went on the questions became repetitious. After each investor made their statement, the first question they were asked was, "Why are you getting involved in such a risky plan?"

Each of my investors became smarter than the reporters by responding the same way as the previous speaker. "Where do you see the risk? Dr. Luck is putting his entire personal fortune into this plan. He is not keeping any of the patents for himself or his family. Before his spacecraft leaves the ground, we will be making money off his patents. If this is not a great business deal, I have never seen one."

When it came William Zabo's turn to speak he was not kind to the reporters. He was brusque and callous.

"There is a reason we are up here, with more money in our bank accounts then all of you will ever make in your lifetime. The reason is we think for the future, while you are stuck in the past and possibly in the present. You take orders; we give orders. Dr. Luck has given us the business deal of a lifetime. Each of you looked at it and called us idiots. Three patents worth billions of dollars on the free market, and all we had to do is put $100 million each into a bank account to get a share of it. I have paid more than that for a ship, and it is still making money for me.

Dr. Luck has already put in $1 Billion of his own money to lead this venture for us. If that doesn't show you how confident he is that this program will be a success, the Wright brothers should not have taken off, in their fabric-covered plane, over a century ago.

This spacecraft will fly into space successfully, with the whole world watching. It will be carrying my granddaughter Laura. I don't like that part of it at all. However, arguing with her is like arguing with her mother. You never win, and you walk away with a headache and heartache. If my son tells me he wants to go along with them, I will break both of his legs, and arms to keep him here with his mother and me. He is just like his cousin, and is as obstinate as a buffalo. I have no idea where that trait comes from; do I Patricia?"

Patti laughed. "No dad, but the next time mom comes for a visit, I'll ask her. I can guarantee you she is going to say it didn't come from her."

"I think we'll discuss that later, in private, later."

"Most of the great thinkers of their times have been proven wrong. As science advances, so does our ability to think forward, and challenge the precepts that came before us. No one believed that Isaac Newton could be wrong. A young person did, and was right. One day you will know that person's name, but not until after our ship has left this tiny part of our universe and traveled to another. This person is donating the patent to the university that had the answer in its hands. They let it slip through their fingers, because they believed Sir Isaac Newton could not be wrong. The best scientific minds in our country were wrong and this person, without a doctorate, and without formal scientific training was right.

Now, go back to your editors and tell them what you've heard here today. You can pick up your paychecks, and think about what is going to happen tomorrow or possibly the next day. Those of us sitting here are thinking about what is going to happen in the next 100 years, and plan for it. This is the reason why we give orders to people like you, and you take them without complaint. You can leave now we have finished with you."

No one dared ask him a question. No one raised their hand to gain his attention. He shut them down, because they did not matter to him or anyone on the dais with him. He was not polite; he did not have to be. He was William Zabo, and they knew it.

***********

Everyone at the dais stood up and went inside the clubhouse, and its air-conditioned comfort. There was no pecking order in here, they were all equals. The children, who were not involved in this venture, were shuttled off to a different room, where food was served. It was a great time for me to ask the question that was rolling around in my head.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I have a rather important question I would like to put to you. Each of you has agreed to put a great deal of your personal fortunes on the line for this project. After today, and the publicity we are going to get, benefactors are going to come out of the woodwork to join us. In one way this is a good thing, because it will spread the risk and diminish the amount of money each of you would have to put in to finish the spacecraft.

The other side of the coin is it would be the diminished returns you will receive from the patents that will come from this project. For each additional member of this group your return will decrease. I will do whatever you ask, because it will not affect me, but this decision has to be yours.

At this moment we have eight investors, do you want to increase it to 20 or more, or leave it as it is, and get the lion's share of the profits."

President Atwater said, "Let's start to my left and go clockwise with your opinions."

Harold Chase went first. "I think we should spread the wealth around. These patents are going to be worth fortunes of untold amounts. I don't want to have enough money in my bank account to pay off the US debt. I vote we open our group to as many people as can afford it. Considering the asking price, there are only about 1200 people in this country that can afford it. We will exclude everyone from nations that are not friendly to ours and anyone whose background we don't like. We can Vet each candidate, or reject them out of hand if we don't like them."

Philip Castronova said, "I think we should open our group to a maximum of 20 investors. I am not worried about the risk, because I do not see any. The rewards are going to be so great, each of us can control where we want our money to go."

Payne Schneider said, "I know what I'm going to do with the money. If I can't stamp out hunger in the United States with the continuous inflow of that much money, I'm going to want to know why. I would like to keep the investors to a maximum of 20."

William Zabo said, "I will throw my hat into the ring with Payne. There is so much waste in the ethanol project alone, we could feed millions of American's instead of putting corn into cars. I would like to keep the investors down to a maximum of 20, and keep control of where our money goes."

Stephano Valentino agreed with his father, under penalty of death from his wife. "William, you know my answer, because your daughter has her gun between my fifth and sixth rib. If I don't go along with you, I will have breathed my last breath. I would like to keep maximum of 20 investors also."

"Son, she does have a way of convincing people, doesn't she?"

"If my mother was still here I could ask for advice on calming Patti down. However, since she is not, the only way to do it is to screw her into a coma. I'm afraid to do it, because of what happened the last time. She may get into a helicopter, and disappear permanently. On second thought, that might not be a bad idea."

Stephano did not get shot, but he did get hit very hard, and repeatedly.

"If you do that again Patti, I will spank you all the way home in front of your children."

"You would not do that to me."

"Do you want to bet?"

"No, I don't want to bet."

"Chicken!"

"No, you had that look in your eyes again."

"You can bet your ass on it."

"That's why I didn't bet my ass on it."

"I guess I'll take your ass a different way."

"Aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself?"

"You have never called it a little head before."

William said, "You two stop it. Laura is sitting next to you, and she's taking notes."

"Thanks grandpa, they were just getting to the good part."

"You're welcome darling; it's what grandparents do, when parents get out of hand."

Turner Stansfield, Boeing's chairman, voted to keep the Association to a maximum of 20 also.

Pres. Atwater said, "With my concurring vote we have a majority of five votes to keep our..., that's a good question, what are we going to call ourselves; a Corporation, a Confederation, an Association, or a Board of Directors. None of us will be drawing an income from this project so there is no tax liability. We will not be able to write our contributions off as a startup, if we don't form a corporation. William you are an expert in these matters; what do you think?"

"Mr. President this is an easy one believe it or not. The money we are going to be throwing into the hat comes off of our taxes because we no longer have that amount of money on our topline. You can't be taxed on what you no longer have. If we form a corporation, that money is taxable, because it is still considered ours as part of the new corporation we are founding.

However, if we are only a Board of Directors, not drawing a salary, and receiving no direct remuneration as a result of the launching of the vehicle we remain tax-free. As each patent begins to pay dividends, we are taxed at a lower rate, as my daughter and Harold have found out, and that money flows in endlessly."

William received a round of applause for his knowledge, and then added one thing. "We need a name for this project so everyone stops calling it by different acronyms. Let's not name it something trite like 'Spaceship to the Stars', because it sounds like were sending grade B actors on a trip to the Badlands of North Dakota. We are in no rush to make an announcement of a particular name, but the sooner we do it the better."

Delicious mumbled, "...for those whose shoulders we stand upon."

"Say that out loud please so everyone can hear you."

"Dad I was just mumbling."

"Then mumble out loud and say it again."

"All I said was, "... For those who shoulders we stand upon."

William said, "It's too long a name for a corporation, but it's a perfect motto for our mission into space."

"Does anyone have an idea for a name for the corporation," Clarke Atwater said.

Stansfield made a suggestion. "I would like to get my company involved in this. I want to make it a nationwide contest for students from middle schools and high schools. I will offer 10 Boeing S.T.E.M. scholarships and internships to the winners. It is cost-effective for us. Our name will be plastered over each competing school in the country. We've had problems getting our 787 into production mode because of a battery problem. I can't think of a way to get more advertising bang for the least amount of dollars. Our project will get more goodwill for my company, then NASA does when they trot out their astronauts once every year. We will put a termination date for this contest as the end of next April, announce the 10 winners in the middle of May, and announce the name of our project at the same time. I hope you will agree with me on this, because it works every time."

President Atwater asked, "Are there any dissenting votes?"

Everyone in the room said, "No."

"The motion passes unanimously. Turner you run with it, it's your baby now."

"Thank you Clarke, it will be my pleasure."

William asked, "Miss Luck did you mumble your way through the proceedings of the University of Chicago, and the Department of Energy files to learn how to defy gravity?"

Surprised, Delicious said, "I never told anyone that except my father."

"You don't have to worry; your secret is safe with us. You can give your work to the University of Chicago as a gift as you planned to do, when you are safely in space. The chief scientist there wants to kill himself because he went the wrong way. When I talked with him about it and showed him his mistake he was inconsolable. He signed an NDA and knows he cannot do anything about it for the rest of his time on this planet, or until you hand him the patent on a silver platter."

"How did you know? How did you find out it was me?"

"I have friends in the scientific community, and they told me that friends of theirs had a meeting with your father. When they returned to work they were no longer themselves. They could not focus on what they were doing. It was obvious to them something earth shattering happened while they were away. None of them mentioned the word anti-gravity, but the word gravity kept popping up. Seven eminent scientists kept saying it. Suddenly, it dawned on one of them to use the word anti-gravity in the same sentence as Dr. Even Luck.

Someone had just tried to keep him from testing radios that transmit sound around mountains. Dr. Luck outsmarted them and did it anyway. Could that same man have come up with a device that defied gravity? It's not possible to defy gravity. Isaac Newton said so, and he had been right for so many centuries, no one argued with his findings.

It's also not possible to transmit radio signals around a mountain, but Dr. Luck did it. Could this same man have found a way to reverse gravities hold on us? It's not possible to do, but his 47th patent made him a multibillionaire in the process of a few minutes, because he proved what couldn't be done, could be done, if you tried hard enough.

Then I find out he has a niece, who came to live with him, because of the terrible accident. A short time later he takes her to visit Austin Texas. No one goes to Austin Texas, except Texans, or unless they are going to meet a particularly good friend of mine. He is still angry with you, because he had to change his telephone number. We discussed you at length, especially your scores in the science and math area of your testing. The only reason you tied your fathers' IQ is because your mechanical engineering skills suck. If you learned how to draw, you would be smarter than he is. A picture began forming in my mind that it wasn't your father who came up with this formula, it was you. I had to send people to Waterville Maine and change out the school's computers to verify it.

Even though you erased everything you looked for and read; it still remains on the hard drives. I must admit much of what you read was way over my head. However, when I saw you reading the University of Chicago/Department of Energy Minutes, and going through their research for hours upon end, I knew something of great importance had happened.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 11



I had my lawyers draw up a nondisclosure agreement that God could not get out of. I went to see Dr. Clawson. I gave him the dates that I wanted to talk to him about and showed him the minutes of the meetings that I was concerned with. I told him he had to sign the nondisclosure agreement for us to continue, and it would only include those dates, and those minutes.

When I showed him where he went left, and should have gone right, instead of left, I think he stopped breathing. I know the words "it can't be possible" came out of his mouth at least a dozen times in a row, as he looked over the new formula. He ran it through his computer, and it worked every time. He asked me who found it; who is going to get the credit for this; all this work is ours."

I asked him, "Exactly where is your work taking you?"

"We are not sure, but there are some exciting possibilities."

"This young woman is not talking possibilities. She is patenting her formula for anti-gravity as soon as we announce it publicly. Delete everything from your computer now. I told him if he even mentioned we had this conversation, he would never work in any science related facility in the world, including the Congo, Chad, and Cambodia. I have contacts everywhere in the world, and you don't want to mess with me."

He said, "I understand my restrictions Mr. Zabo, and I will abide by them. I wish you and this person all the luck in the world. I am happy it was found, although I wish it were me that found it. I hope they realize that they are going to win every science prize there is, because proving Newton was wrong is the biggest thing to happen since splitting the atom."

I had my proof, I knew who you were, and I was about to get in touch with your father, when my daughter called me. She asked me to join this group, and I told her how stupid she was. I told her she was throwing her money away. Dr. Luck was just that, he was lucky. I aggravated her for a few minutes, just like she aggravates me, and breaks my heart. However, I had to forgive her, because she is like her mother, and her father. Both of them were and are impossibly hardheaded, and she is their product. Her children are finding that out now. Aren't you Anna?"

"Why do you always ask me the hard questions grandpa?"

"Because darling, you will give me a short truthful answer; while Laura and Robert would take up more time than reading the Constitution of this great country, backwards."

"I love my mother grandpa, but she has been a pain in the ass for the last few years."

Patti yelled, "I'm getting better."

"So is a cactus, after you've been dealing with porcupines."

"As I said ladies and gentlemen, my granddaughter does give short and very pointed answers."

Everyone laughed, but Stephano laughed the loudest.

"Dr. Luck, you have the money in the bank and the clock is ticking. What do you want to do next?"

"We need centralized laboratory space. We're going to need several of IBM's Big Blues. I will not get into everything else we need. I will speak with Mr. Valentino on that. The list will seemingly be endless, but once we have everything put together, we will go after the people that we need. There is no sense having the people without having the things they need to do their work.

Mr. Schneider has companies that can be retrofitted to produce our molds as soon as we come up with the appropriate designs for the exterior trusses of the spacecraft's spaces between the first and second hull. We need him to start working with the carbon fiber. We have to find out what it can and cannot be turned into as far as molded products, and how much stress it can take. I don't believe the curved exterior of the craft will be a problem. The problem area will be the exterior trusses holding the antennas, cameras, and telescopes. If we can't solve that problem, we won't take them along. I don't want to jeopardize the mission for the sake of transmissions back to earth.

Boeing has been making bladders for refueling aircraft for years. As soon as we have those designs ready, we will see if they can make them for the area between the trusses to carry the water to protect us from the gamma rays and radiation we will be bombarded by.

We are going to need access to Exascale computers William; maybe not today or tomorrow, but within the next few years. We are going to need to sit by them and use them for our own purposes. When it comes to the internal uses of our spacecraft, those are the only computers that will work fast enough to make our mission successful.

Finally, it would be great to know where we were going to build the craft so we could put our scientific people close by. It's not a necessity; it would just be nice to know. I think that's all I'll say for right now."

President Atwater asked, "Does anyone have anything to add?"

Harold Chase said, "I'm hungry."

Callie said, "You are on a diet, you are always hungry."

"This meeting is adjourned. You will all receive notices from Stephano, when our next meeting will be required."

They all stood up and began talking with one another as they proceeded to the banquet area for an afternoon meal. The spacecraft was not the only topic they discussed. Many other areas of their businesses were talked about. Deals were brokered, sales of companies begun, or finalized, and hundreds of millions of dollars changed hands before dessert. This is what William Zabo was talking about. There was not a pen or piece of paper in evidence. These people used their minds to make deals that other people would take months to make a decision. They were the elite; the "Point One Percent (.1%) of the One Percent (1%) of the richest people in the world, and they didn't get their by chance.

********

The National News carried the event, but left out Williams caustic comments about the press at the end. No editor wanted the public to see how one of the wealthiest men in the world treated the press corps. It would diminish their standing with their constituencies, but more importantly, with the companies that bought commercial time. It would be a disaster of epic proportions for them.

********

Tuesday morning at 9 AM, Theodore Nugent and Rod Laver filed two patents under the name of Delicious Luck. The first was for the nuclear power plant and the second was for the Ion/H2 engine. When they completed this task, they took their limousine to the Department of Energy and filed a request to build the power plant in a 1/90 scale for use on the spaceship. The Department of Energy had no control over the Ion/H2 Engine.

They were told it would take between three and five years before the nuclear power plant would come under consideration.

Ted Nugent asked for this to be put in writing. It was given to him on a Department of Energy letterhead.

They went to the Federal Court, a few short blocks away and filed for a 'Show Cause Order' from a judge that was on standby from a fellow attorney in New York, Tom Shackleford.

They returned to the Department of Energy and gave the same woman the court order.

"We will see you in court next week; have a good day."

She was on the phone to her superiors before her door closed. She knew trouble when she saw it coming at her.

Her boss asked her the name of the attorney's they would be facing.

She looked at the order and said, "Thomas Shackleford and James Hurst; for the Winner's Group."

"Oh fuck; we are in trouble. Move this request to the top of the list and forward the request to the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. Tell them to go over it with a fine toothcomb. If there are no flaws, tell them to approve it as soon as is humanly possible. I don't want to wind up in court for the rest of my life."

"I'll get right on it sir."

3 PM that same day, the Winners Group received a phone call from the Department of Energy asking to speak to the attorney in charge of the patent filed for the Nuclear Reactor in the name of Delicious Luck.

The operator said, "One moment please."

"This is Vincent Caruso, how may I be of service?"

"Hello Mr. Caruso, this is Caroline Freeman, from the Department Of Energy. We have forwarded your request for the Nuclear Power Plant, both in 1/90 scale and in full working scale to the Nuclear Regulatory Commission with our approval. It is in their hands now. If you have any further need to discuss a time frame for approval you will have to contact them."

"What took you so long Miss Freeman? I expected this phone call before lunch."

"The NRC had a bug of its ass about the speed we approved it. We had to use considerable muscle to get them to take it, and move it to the top of their list. They are not going to be easy on you, Mister Caruso, they are going to use everything they can to delay you from moving forward."

"We are well aware of that possibility, and we will be ready for them, just as we were ready for you. Thank you for your time. Goodbye Miss Freeman."

Caroline shook her head. "I would not want to be on the technical staff of the NRC. If they forget a comma, or a colon in a technical sentence, they are going to be in court."

***********

In another part of Washington, Celeste and Philip Castronova were in the Senate dining room speaking with Senators from several southwestern states, with large military land reserves. Their money helped give them their seats in this elite group of lawmakers, and they were loath to lose it. However, they also were beholding to other large donors, and to the military that controlled those large areas of protected land. They would not give up 1 inch of it for some frivolous undertaking.

Philip threw the knockout punch.

"If you don't give us access to a minimum of 100,000 acres of land, in an area we choose, we will not give our military access to Dr. Luck's new radio invention that transmits sound around mountains. We own 20% of that patent. Two of our friends own 20% each. Dr. Luck owns 21%. We will offer it to every country that can pay for it, but the greatest country in the world will not have access to it. Tell that to your President, while we flood the airways with advertisements telling the people of this great country what you turned down. All of you will be private citizens after the next election, and your friends on the other side of the aisle will be happy to take over for the next eight years, or more."

Celeste said, "Dear, I think you just ruined their desire for dessert. Let's go home, I miss our children."

William Zabo was across the Potomac, at the Pentagon. He was speaking with Gen. Haley, a member of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. He was delivering the same speech to him. The only difference in his speech included military funding. He had enough influence on the House Budget Committee to reduce military spending to the bone.

By the end of his meeting, Gen. Haley said he would do everything in his power to give William access to restricted military areas for their project.

When he was back in his limousine William sent a short text to Philip. "Mission accomplished."

Philip replied, "Here too, going home."

************

47. Planning

Jennifer grabbed me around my neck and kissed me as if I had been gone for a year.

"Don't you ever leave me alone again. I am so horny I could fuck an elephant."

"Jen, you can't take me, how are you going to fuck an elephant?"

"I don't know, but I would give it damn good try. Gordon is with Roz, we are going to bed."

"Have you ever heard of jet lag?"

"Have you ever heard of death by a pregnant woman? You owe me Even. You've been gone four days. It's time for you to catch up."

"If you two don't stop talking and go to your room, Delicious is going to attack and kill me."

"Take her for a run, Gray, a very long run. When she is exhausted, keep her running longer. Then turn around and have her run home. If she can rape you after that, you better have a physical before you get married. You could die on your honeymoon night."

Delicious jumped on Gray's back. "Let's go Gray, let's leave my parents alone so they can scream all they want. I'm going to prove to you that I am as good as you are both at running, and in bed."

"You are on short stuff."

Delicious hit his arm. "I am a girl. 5'7" is tall for a girl. 6'3" is above average for man. Now do you want to run, or do you want to chicken out?"

"Little girl, you are so lucky I love you." He climbed up the stairs, while she nibbled on his ears, and kissed his neck. They were an odd couple, but they were madly in love with each other."

We were naked when we heard the front door close, and I took my beautiful wife by the hand and led her to the shower.

"I took a shower this morning."

"Did you take one with me?"

"You weren't here, how could I?"

"Well, this will be your first shower of the day with me."

"Even, we will be wasting water."

"No we won't, because I would be taking a shower anyhow. This will be a shower for two."

"You are a pain in the ass."

"I am too big for your ass, and that will be $10 please."

"You said that word too. You owe the pretzel jar $10."

"Agreed."

The shower took a very long time, but Jennifer did not complain. I was able to get her to orgasm by playing with her breasts. I could tell she missed me, because her body was on a hair trigger. When my tongue touched her clitoris the first time, she screamed my name, and exploded. Her body turned to mush, and she slithered down the wall, until we looked eye to eye.

"Hello baby, am I catching up yet?"

"I will never understand how you went all those years without having sex. You are marvelous at it. I love you husband. I am never letting you out of my sight again."

"I can live with that. Would you like to go to bed and get laid now?"

"Can we cuddle first; I think I need a nap."

"You are in charge of this household. We will do whatever you want."

That was that way our day went; we napped, made love, napped again, and repeated this over and over again.

Delicious pounded on our door around 8 o'clock and asked if we were going to have dinner with them.

"I am eating pussy, go away."

"Dad, you are so gross."

Jennifer didn't think so, as she came again, and again. I wasn't doing too badly in that department either. Our blue sheets had stains on them everywhere, and in the very early hours of the morning, we had to change them, because there wasn't a dry spot to lie down on.

My body got me up at 9:30 AM, although my mind wanted to stay in bed with my wife. Coffee and food helped, but getting back to work helped more.

Gray came down to the lab at 10:30 AM and reminded me that Delicious was leaving with him that Friday and going to Houston to file his paperwork to leave NASA.

"You are not going alone. I'm sending two guards with you. If you say no, Delicious stays here."

"I had a feeling you were going to do something like this Even. Are they the two drivers from the armored cars that got blown to hell?"

"Yes they are, and you will be going to Houston in an armored SUV. I am not taking any chances with either of you."

"We can fly down if it would make you more comfortable."

"I wanted you two to be able to talk, but either way with these two men traveling with you that will not be possible. Yes, please fly down. I will have Rod make all the arrangements. I will start paying you $300,000 a year as soon as you resign from NASA."

"Even I don't need your money."

"I just put $80 billion in the bank. Do you think $300,000 a year is going to hurt me?"

"I want a raise."

"NO."

"I'm going to be your son, and you are paying me pennies."

"You are getting my most precious asset. Hurt her, and you will know what pain really feels like."

"When I thought I lost her, all I felt was pain. Nothing could hurt me more than that."

"I will have Gordon hit you like he hit Rod."

"Ouch."

"I want to get to work on the trusses for the exterior hull of the vehicle. Every time I think about it, it gets a larger. At this moment I am thinking of a diameter of 150 feet, but I don't think that's going to be enough. I have to find out how much water we are going to need in that outer shell to protect us from the radiation. Is it going to be one foot thick or 3 feet thick? I don't know?"

"I do!"

I turned around and saw my five-year-old son jumping down the stairwell. "Be careful Gordon, if anyone's going to break your neck, it's going to be me."

He ran to me and gave me a big hug. "Hi dad, did you have a fun time while you were away?"

"I wouldn't call it fun, but businesswise it went well."

"Can I ask you a favor for the next time you go away?"

"Sure, anything you want."

"Please take mommy with you. She screams a lot when you're not here."

"Who is going to take care of you if I take your mommy with me?"

"If you're only going to be gone a short time, I'll be fine by myself. Leave me a jar of peanut butter, some milk, bread and my cell phone and I'll be good for the week."

"If you ever say that to your mother, you will never reach six Gordon; especially the part about the cell phone."

"Doesn't mommy like Danielle and Brandy?"

"It has nothing to do with them. Well, it has everything to do with them. Now how much water do we need between the first and second hulls to protect us from gamma rays and radiation?"

"As much as you going to want to put people into stasis, as soon as possible, after we leave our part of the universe, they are not going to want to do it. Everyone is going to be too excited to go to sleep. You will have to think about four days of drinking water for everyone on board, plus showers and using the bathroom. If you limit us to 60 instead of 80 people, you will only be saving us 2000 pounds of water, so that will not be a problem. We will need 30 inches of water for minimum protection from everything space will throw at us. The larger you make the external sphere the more that water is going to weigh. As long as Delicious has no problem with getting us off the ground with that much weight, we are fine."

"Do you doubt my engines capacity tiny?"

"I'm not tiny, I'm five."

"Well in that case shorty, where's my kiss?"

He kissed her. "You taste like soap."

"That's because I washed my face with soap."

"Don't you wash the soap off your face with water afterwards?"

"Do you want to be able to sit down at Gordon 2, or are you going to be mean to me today?"

"Can I think about that?"

"Can I hit you now and take it back later?"

"No, I don't think that would work out very well for me. We have to figure out how much the water would weigh, but dad doesn't know the size of the exterior of our ship yet."

"Do you have a rough idea dad?"

"I was thinking of diameter of 150 feet. I don't want to go any smaller than that because of the electronics, life-support, sleeping compartments, food, medicine, maintenance supplies, seeds for food, and all the other supplies we will need to start a new life on the new planet. I would like to do one other thing and surprise the shit out of everyone back here at home."

"You have an evil grin on your face, Dad. What are you thinking about?"

"Could we build a probe and as we pass through Heliopause, launch it back to earth, and have it transmit pictures on its reverse course. We can add a message from us with pictures of stars from angles they have never seen before. No one would ever be able to call what we did a hoax."

"Even they are going to see us building the ship, launch it, and flying it out of Earth's atmosphere. No one is going to call what we are going to do a hoax."

"Well, it was just a thought. Numbers person, get me the weight of 36 inches of water for the interior space between hull number one, and two using a diameter of 150 feet."

"Do you want it now dad, or should I go say hello to mommy first?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 11



"You mommy is a little tired now. Why don't you go to the computer and get me what I need."

"Why do I have to use the computer dad, I know what the numbers are."

Gray said, "Please tell me he didn't say that; did he?"

"No he didn't, the Sequoias are talking to one another."

"Thank you, I feel better now."

"Which part do you want to tell them Gordon? Do you want to tell them the weight of the water, the cubic feet, or the volume? I want to show them I know math too. You're not the only smart one in this house."

"I'll go first. The water weighs 4, 190,766 pounds."

Delicious said, "If you don't tell them one more thing, you're going to be wrong."

"I'm beginning not to like you Delicious."

Quickly, Gray and I said, "Join the group Gordon."

"Shut up Gray or I am going to hit you. Gordon what did you forget?"

"Okay, the water has to be at least at 65°F; but below 100°. Are you happy now?"

"Yes I am. The ship will be carrying 67,500 ft.³ of water, and a total volume of 504,900 US gallons."

"Delicious that's puts us 4 million pounds over my take-off weight estimate. Are your engines going to be able to handle it?"

She smiled at me. "Do you mean you want me to push the engines a little bit and show off dad?"

"Gray if you hold her down, I'll spank her."

Gray got up from his seat, and Delicious ran for the stairs.

She yelled, "Sit down Gray!"

He didn't, and by the time she had her foot on the third riser, his hand was wrapped around her ankle.

"Down children, I was only joking."

"Even, you can't do that to me. I was about to start my day with a smile on my face."

"Do you remember what Jennifer said about me rolling over in bed Gray? It could happen very soon Gray; very, very soon."

Gordon said, "I roll over in bed all the time, what's so bad about that?"

Gray replied, "When your mother wakes up Gordo, please ask her. If I tell you, either your father or your mother will kill me."

"If Gray told me dad, would you really kill him?"

"Yes Gordon, and after I killed him, I would really start to hurt him."

Gordon had a perplexed look on his face as he thought about my answer.

"Dad, how can you... never mind."

Gray, Delicious, and I laughed at the look on my son's face. I scooped him up in my arms and kissed him at least a dozen times.

"My son there are things a five-year-old is not supposed to know, but will know as he gets older. You are a genius when it comes to math and science, but you are a little boy where it counts. I love that part of you more than you will ever know. It makes me so happy that you can run around and play with your friends and not be tied to the computer at all hours of the day and night. I want you to enjoy your youth. I want you to enjoy using your skills. I want you to enjoy both of them in equal measure. I love you Gordon as if you were my own."

"I love you too dad. Are you losing hair?"

"Yes I am. Your mother keeps pulling it out of my head. She yelled at you while I was away. She yelled a lot at me last night, and pulled out a lot of my hair while she was doing it."

Delicious laughed. "That was a great way to dodge a bullet dad!"

"I don't have all those patents for nothing big mouth."

"I get in enough trouble calling her 'Shorty'. If I called her 'Big Mouth,' I would be visiting a dentist."

"That's the difference between a father, and a boyfriend, Gray. If I told her I was paying you $300,000 a year, she would go ballistic."

She did. "How much are you paying him? You are paying me a lousy $60 an hour, and you are paying him $300,000 a year? I'm on strike. You are not getting another minute of work out of me, until I get a raise."

"Okay. You are not allowed in the lab anymore. Get out, now."

"What, you are kicking me out of the lab?"

"You are on strike, remember? There is no telling what damage you could try to do to my computers. Gray would you escort my daughter upstairs please?"

"I'd rather not do it, she might kill me."

"Gordon, would you escort your sister out of the laboratory please?"

"I would really like to see six years old dad."

"I guess I will have to do it. Move it Delicious."

Tears filled her eyes as she walked up each step one. She opened the door, turned towards me and with venom in her voice she said, "Go fuck yourself dad, I'm leaving."

"I can."

"What!"

"Don't forget your checkbook."

"You can keep it; I don't want anything from you. I'll make it on my own."

"At least take the car, it's a long walk to Denver."

"I'll leave it at the airport."

"I'm still responsible for you for one more year. I could keep you here, but if you want to go, I won't stop you."

"I'm going to say goodbye to my mother, and then I'm leaving. Good luck getting your ship off the ground without me."

"I have your formulas and your schematics. I will have to work harder and bring more people in, but I'm sure I can get it done. It's was interesting finding out you are my daughter. I wish I knew it 17 years ago. You wouldn't be the self-absorbed bitch that you are today. Try as I might to help you grow up in the short period of time we've had together, you refuse to see the big picture. You only see your selfish self, and not being part of the whole. You could have had anything in this world you wanted. All you had to do was ask for it and not throw a fit anytime anyone else got something. You wanted a house in Maui. I told you to draw it up, find a piece of land, and we would build it. I gave Gray a salary a little larger than what he was making at NASA, including his benefits, and you threw a fit because of it. Do you ever balance your checkbook?"

"No, Rod does that for me."

"Do you have any idea what your balance is?"

"No because my bill goes to Rod."

"What bill do you have?"

"It's my birth control pills."

"Maybe, before you go running away like your idiot uncle did once, you should speak to Rod and ask about your financial situation. How much money do you get paid per year? How much money do you have in your checking account, savings account, and assorted other accounts that you don't want any part of. I am used to living like this, you're not.

I think you should have taken control of your finances from the very beginning. It may have been an eye-opening experience for you to learn how to balance your own checkbook, pay your own taxes, and live like most of the other people in this country do."

"You are just trying to keep me here."

"You can stay with Rod; you can stay at a hotel, or you can sleep on a park bench; I don't care. I just want you to realize what you have, what you have to lose, and how much you have to do to grow up. You had better say goodbye to Gray. I think he deserves that much."

"You're a real bastard dad."

"You've told me that many times before. Once you leave me, you won't have to say it again. Good luck in your future endeavors; call Rod, have him come over with your financial information, and I'll send Gray up so you can say goodbye."

"Tell him to meet me by mom."

"If you are looking for moral support, it won't help."

"I know, but I will be with one dead person, while I'm killing another one."

"At least I didn't waste any money preparing for a wedding."

I didn't give my daughter a chance to respond. I turned and walked down to the lab.

Gray looked at me and knew something was terribly wrong.

"She's running, isn't she?"

"Yes she is, and I didn't try to stop her. She has got to make this decision on her own. I told her what a fool she was for making such an ass out of herself. I told her I'm paying you less than you are worth to me, but more than NASA was paying you.

It turns out I made some mistakes also. She never balanced her own checkbook. She doesn't even know what her bank balance is. Rod does it all for her, as he does for me. It was my mistake, and it was a big one. If she knew what I was actually paying her none of this would've happened."

"How much are you paying her?"

"I'm paying her $500,000 a year, plus benefits and the car, and security."

"You are paying her more than you are paying me?"

"Let's not get into that right now, I don't want to cut your salary. She's waiting for you by her mother. I told her she owes you a goodbye."

"You're damn right she does."

***********

Gray walked slowly towards the gravesite trying to figure out the best way to salvage their relationship. He knew kindness and loving words would not work. There was only one other option, so he decided to go with it and see what happened. As he saw it, he had only one chance to pull off the miracle he wanted so badly.

Delicious heard him coming. She turned but kept her eyes on the ground. She had a short repentant speech ready for him. When he was close enough, she looked up, and saw a mean and angry look in his eyes. She understood why.

"Hello Gray."

He didn't reply. His right hand flew out, and slapped her across the face, knocking her to the ground.

"Goodbye you lying, rotten bitch; I hope you rot in hell." He turned and stormed away.

She screamed through her tears, "Gray, I'm sorry; don't leave me."

He turned around. "Maybe I have this wrong; but aren't you the one that's leaving me."

"I don't know what I'm doing anymore. My father has me so confused I'm not sure which way is up."

"Yes you do. You just got pissed off because he's paying a scientist with three years working experience, on $1 trillion project, what he's worth. You were insulted, and reacted like a child. Your dad called your bluff, and instead of backing down, you threatened him. You never threaten a man with an ace high straight flush."

"I don't know how to play cards."

"You also don't know how life works. You are not a high school student Delicious. It's time for you to start acting like an adult. Gordon acts more grown-up than you do at times."

"I don't care how short he is, that little boy is 30."

"He can't be his mother is only 24."

"Will you help me up please I have rocks embedded in my hands."

"That all depends, are you leaving or are you staying?"

"I'll stay.

"That didn't sound very convincing to me. Why are you staying?"

"I can't picture my life without you in it."

"What about the science?"

"If my dad doesn't want me to have any part in it, I'll go running every day. I'll become the best damn runner there ever was."

"You are a fucking idiot. You have a brilliant scientific mind, and because of an argument with your father, you would throw it all away."

"What am I supposed to do Gray?"

"Apologize, Delicious, you are the one that made the mistake, own up to it."

"My father is very hard to get along with Gray. He knows exactly what buttons to push to get me to explode."

"You have never been in the business world. Your father is the easiest person to work for I have ever known. He tells you what he wants you to do and lets you do it. If you do it wrong he will criticize you for it, and show you where you went wrong.

In the business world, if you do it wrong they fire you, and you're out on the street looking for another job."

"I will stay. I will try to apologize to my father, but more than that I am sorry for what I did to you. I love you Gray, I never meant for this to happen."

"The next time you do this to me, you will be lying next to your mother."

"I am lying next to my mother."

"You are not lying close enough to her. Do you understand what I mean?"

"Yes sir."

He lifted her up as if she was a feather and looked at her face.

"You have two choices: you can walk around with a handprint on the left side of your face, or I can hit you on the right side, and you will have matching handprints. Which would you prefer?"

"I will go with the one handprint. My face hurts."

"Delicious, it took everything I had in me not to hit you with all the fury I had in me. If I did, you would be waking up alone now."

"The next time we go to a sporting goods store remind me to get a boxing helmet. If I ever get you that angry again, I want to be prepared."

"Don't even think about getting me this angry again. Death would be too merciful for what I would do to you. Don't you realize how much I love you? Do you know what losing you would do to me? I would be of no further use to this project, because I would not be able to concentrate. You are so beautiful you take my breath away. You have to grow into that beauty and become the person I know you can be."

"I am trying."

"Yes you are; very, very trying."

"That was not funny Gray."

"I see your sense of humor has not come back yet."

"It may come back when my face stops hurting."

"Let's go back to the house; I'll put some ice on it."

*********

They walked into the kitchen, where Jennifer was drinking her morning coffee. She saw the handprint on Delicious and yelled, "What the hell did you do to him this time?"

"Why is it always me?"

"If it was him, he would have the handprint on his face, not you. Sit down, let's talk about it? Get lost Gray."

"I was going to put..."

"I will put ice on her face; leave."

"Yes ma'am."

She took a cold pack out of the freezer, wrapped it in a towel, and put it across Delicious face.

"Hold it there for five minutes, and start talking. What did you do wrong this time?"

"I pissed off my father, and I pissed off Gray even worse."

"Okay, so let's start with that. What did you do to your father?"

"I told him to go fuck himself."

"If he wanted to, he could; but it would hurt like hell."

"Jen don't do that to me please."

"I was just responding to your question. What else did you do, because that would not have gotten him so pissed off that you would have gone running outside and have Gray follow you, and smack you into next week."

"Dad told me how much he was paying Gray, and I had a hissy fit over it. I said you're only paying me $60 an hour and I'm not working another minute until I get a raise. I'm on strike. He kicked me out of the lab saying there was no telling what damage I could do to the computers."

"What did you say to that?"

"I told him to go fuck himself."

"Do you believe that was the smartest thing to do?"

"There were two things wrong with what I did: First, I was angry and I overreacted. Second, I forgot what it would do to Gray."

"Take the ice pack off your face for a minute. I take it you have rectified things with Gray. What are you going to do with your father?"

"Gray told me I got myself into this mess, and I should apologize to dad. I'm going to find that very hard to do."

"Why, if you caused this situation, shouldn't you be the one to clear it up?"

"My dad does this on purpose. He pushes and pushes and pushes me places I'm not ready to go yet. I know he thinks I have to get there quickly, but he doesn't understand that I can't take these leaps of faith he wants me to take. I'm still afraid to take baby steps. I told Gray I'm in awe of Gordon because of the way he acts at times. Mentally I think he's older than I am. I missed out on a lot of years of growing up, because of what my father was doing to our family. I don't know if I'll ever be able to catch up."

"Honey, I think it's time for you to go to college. The only way you are going to learn how to interact with people is to be with a bunch of them your own age at one time."

I said to my wife, "When did you get so smart?"

"I told this passenger a joke about flying backwards into a mountain. He listened to me, and I married him."

"How long have you been standing there dad?"

"Since Gray came downstairs and told me you were back."

"So you heard everything we talked about?"

"Yes I did, and if you don't want to apologize, I can accept that. I do push you hard because I want you to grow, but maybe Jennifer's idea is better. I will get in touch with the Commandant of the Air Force Academy and sign you up immediately."

Jennifer threw her coffee cup at me. She missed my head by a wet cunt hair. It shattered into 1000 pieces. She told me I was going to sweep the mess up, because my idea was as stupid as the grin on my face.

Jen said, "I'm going to call a friend at the University of Colorado. You will start next Monday, as a non-degree seeking student. Gray should rent an apartment near the school. You can stay in town, Monday through Friday, and come home on the weekends. You two can live there, while you mingle with people your own age, and he commutes to work here."

"What if I don't want to go to college?"

"Tough shit, you're going. You are going to meet people your own age, and you are going to interact with them. If you don't learn more than I did, I'm going to meet you there, and beat the crap out of you."

"Jennifer, I remember what you learned in college. Those jokes were disgusting."

"That's why I said if you don't learn more than I did I was going to beat the crap out of you."

"What courses should she take?"

"We want her to interact with students, not study. Let her take science, technology, engineering, and math. She is great at those already. She's not seeking a degree. She needs to be with kids her age."

"Dad I don't know about this."

"Don't look at me baby; I have nothing to do with this. If you think I'm going to argue with my wife, you're wrong. She runs this house not me."

"You are afraid of Jennifer?"

"Absolutely not, I just do what she tells me to do."

"Jen would you teach me how to do that with Gray?"

"Little girl, you need a stricter hand than your father does. You need Gray the way he is."

"I didn't need to know that."

"Yes you did Delicious. You are better off knowing it now than later."

"Well, it's only going to be for 10 years, I should be able to take it for that long."

"Have you started writing your contract with him yet?"

"No dad, we've been busy straightening up our room."

Jen laughed. "At least our excuse sounded better; 'We were getting things straight between us.' Your excuse even sounds lame."

"We have the cleanest room in the house, you can check."

"I have, and it's not. Gordon's room is the cleanest. I think he even dusts under his bed."

"I'm going to kill that little boy."

The telephone rang and Jennifer picked it up. She laughed and hung up.

"Your lawyer is angry with you. He's been calling your cell phone so you can let him in. He's been sitting at the gate for five minutes and he's not happy. He wants to know if you lost the phone again."

"No, I didn't lose it, I left it downstairs."

I went to the panel in the entranceway, punched in the codes, and let my friend in. One day I was going to trap him between the two gates and leave them there, just on general principles.

Rod walked in all smiles. He handed Delicious a folio containing all her financial documents, but asked her not to open it. He had something more important to take care of. He asked where Gordon was, because he was needed up here.

I called my son, and he came running up the stairs. Running is a little overstating what my five-year-old boy could do on those stairs.

"Dad was it Danielle, or Brandy who called?"

Jennifer banged her head against the table. "I should castrate him now."

"What does mom mean dad?"

"Your mom was joking with you Gordon. It was a funny joke, and when you get older I will explain it to you."

"That's the second time today you said I had to wait until I get older to understand something. Is something bad going on?"

"No Gordon, nothing at all. Rod needs to speak to you."

Rod picked up Gordon and put him on a chair. He laid five pieces of paper in front of him.

"Gordon, how would you like to go to court next week, with your mom, dad, and me to make you a GOSL?"

Gordon's eyes lit up. "Really, like my mom, I can go from a GOS to a GOSL?"

"Well, as I remember, you said you'd rather be a GOSL then a GOOSE."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 11



"That's right, because they can cook a goose, but they can't cook a GOSL! When are we going to do it? When do I officially become like my mom; a Luck 'Y' person?"

"Gordon, you were always a lucky person, because you had a wonderful mom. Now you are going to have two wonderful parents. My best friend is going to be your real dad. You are going to be a part of a wonderful family. Dr. Even Luck, Mrs. Jennifer Stars Luck, Miss Delicious Luck, and Mr. Gordon Oliver Stars Luck or GOSL! Congratulations to the new Mr. Luck 'Y'."

Everyone applauded, but there were tears in Jennifer, and my eyes. Gordon was officially my son, well next week he would be, as soon as the judge signed off on the paperwork.

Jennifer had Gordon in her arms kissing and hugging him. I had to wait my turn.

Delicious got to him next, and congratulated her little brother. She turned and handed him to me. I thought he was going to break my neck as he hugged me. I don't think I would have cared if he did. It was a show of affection that made my life worthwhile.

I asked Rod, "What about his sperm donor?"

"You don't have to worry about him ever again. He has signed all his rights to Gordon away in perpetuity. He knows if he ever tries to claim parentage to Gordon he will be sued into bankruptcy for the rest of his natural life. He will never have a penny to his name ever again."

I said to everyone, "I think this calls for a big day on the town. Get your gang prepared to go out this afternoon Rod. We are going into Denver early. Gordon will pick out the restaurant, and we will go to the amusement park afterwards. I have to show you what Jennifer looks like on a children's train ride."

Jennifer screamed, "I'm not getting on that train ride again. I'm not going; you will have to kill me first."

The way she said it, I knew she meant it. I put a plan into motion immediately.

We had a wonderful meal at Gordon's favorite restaurant: 'WENDY'S.' Since it was Gordon's choice, Jennifer didn't complain too much. After we finished, it was a trip to Carvel, where each of us enjoyed much too much soft ice cream. By the time we finished eating all of it, we were much too full and laughing like our children.

Finally, we took the short ride to the amusement park, and the kids were having a blast. There was not one ride they passed up. Since Delicious and Gray were with us, they took the smaller children on the rides that required them to have an escort.

Jennifer held my arm, believing she dodged a hail of bullets. As we were watching our children board the front cars of the train ride, Rosalynn, Delicious, and Gray snuck up behind her, picked her up, and carried her onto the ride. Rod and I were hysterical, because Jennifer was trying desperately to get off. Rosalynn was in the same car with her, and blocked her every move. Delicious and Gray held her down from their seats one car behind. She said words that should not have been said around children that young. She was still screaming when the train left the platform. Rod and I waved goodbye.

Although I could not make out the exact words Jennifer was saying to the three evil doers at the time, when the train stopped after its second full the circuit around the tracks, the three of them took off like scared rabbits, with Jennifer close behind them. She continued the chase until she was exhausted.

Rod and I stood there and laughed.

When Gray finally joined us, he said, "Even, you have no idea how much your daughter loves this. Jennifer is right. She has to mingle with kids her own age. She is a child at heart. She was never able to do this when she was young. It may be the only way she will be able to adapt to the real world. Look at her; do you see how relaxed she is. She is this way with me sometimes, when we talk in private, but she is always tense, and ready to strike out at anyone she thinks threatens her.

I will rent an apartment close to the University, and have my car brought up here. I will commute to your place every day, and drive back here every night. I think she will come around very quickly this way."

"Sell your car down there, Gray. I'll buy you a new one as part of your incentive package."

"Can I pick out the car?"

"Yes you can; as long as it's a four-wheel-drive Audi SUV."

"Do you have stock in that company?"

"No, but I own the land the dealership sits on. I would hate for him to go out of business, and leave me with an empty lot."

"Can I pick out a different color than blue?"

"Of course you can, as long as it's not white, silver, tan, or beige."

"I guess I shouldn't ask why, because you gave Delicious this lecture already."

"Yes I did, and that's why we are driving blue Audi's."

"I accept your offer. You drive a very hard bargain."

"I know, but I have another question to ask you Gray. Are you planning to get married next July?"

"Absolutely, why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering if you had asked my daughter if she wants to marry you."

"Where have you been Even? You know she wants to marry me."

"Are you sure?

"Even, I am positive, why do you ask?"

"If you are positive, what's missing from my daughter's hand?"

"Oh fuck, I'm an idiot."

"Yes you are, especially since she is going to be among 1500 freshmen boys a week from Monday."

"I need tomorrow off."

"Why?"

"I have to see a man about a horse's ass."

"I would ask Jen and Rosalynn about Delicious' ring size, before you make a horse's ass out of yourself again."

"Could you distract your daughter for a moment or two, without starting another war?"

"Are you accusing me of being an agitator?"

"You're damn right I am."

"Okay, I'll speak to her, and try not to set off a nuclear reaction."

Jennifer was still reaming out Rosalynn and Delicious for pulling her onto the train ride, when Gray told my daughter I wanted to speak to her. She walked over to me and asked, "What did I do wrong this time?"

"If this the way you want to start our conversation, you can go back and speak with Jennifer and Rosalynn. We don't have to speak to each other ever again. Tell me how you want to work this, and that's what I'll do it. You looked happy and relaxed. I thought we could speak with each other without using knives. Apparently, I was wrong."

"Shit! No, you are not wrong, I was. I did exactly what Gray told me I do every time I feel threatened. I retreat into my shell and act like a bitch. You have been nice to me. You have been more like a father to me than Julius ever was. I am not frightened around you, because I know you will never hurt me. You scare me when you want me to move faster than I'm capable of moving. I know you think it's for the best, but my mind is not ready for it. I'm still 13 years old, and I see Julius leering at me because I have breasts. That's when mom closed everything down around me. I stopped maturing because of the way I had to handle myself. It made me who I am today. I am frightened of moving forward. I don't know if I want to grow up, or if I'm just not ready to grow up. I felt safe with you at the beginning, until you started to push me to grow up. That's when we started to argue.

Then Gray came along and I wasn't sure if I felt safe with him, or if I was in love with him. I told you in church I thought I loved him. You gave me the go-ahead to find out, by using my head, and not my hormones.

I loved you for that. You could have stopped me from doing anything about it, but you didn't. It was the first time I was given the option of doing something for myself.

Then the worst thing in the world happened to me; both of you wanted me to grow up, and I still wasn't ready. Talking with Gray helps me, but I still have a long way to go. Do you think I should see someone about it?"

"Do you think you are any crazier than I am?"

"How crazy are you?"

"I'm crazy enough to think that radio waves can be bent enough to go around mountains. Are you crazy enough to think that Sir Isaac Newton is wrong?"

"I know he is wrong."

"Would you stand up in front of a class, with the Dean of the School of Mathematics watching you and state that as a fact?"

"I would stand on the 50 yard line of a football stadium at halftime and yell that out."

"Then why do you need to see a doctor? All you need is a little time, and if Jennifer is right, a little exposure to people your own age. Do you have school clothes?"

"I don't know; what do they wear to school here?"

"Don't look at me; I went to school 12 years ago. I think you should ask Gray."

"Thanks dad, I will." She turned away and started walking towards Gray. She stopped, midstride, whirled around, and ran to me.

She grabbed me around my waist, put her head against my chest, and cried out, "I'm sorry dad. I'm trying my best, I really am. Don't be disappointed in me."

She cried as I kissed her head and stroked her hair. "I could never be disappointed in you. You had a lousy start in life, and all I'm doing is trying to make it better. I know I don't get it right all the time, but you have to remember, I've only been a dad for four months.

Babies don't come with a book of instructions, and neither did you. Babies come in smaller packages, when they arrive; and their parents learn as they get bigger.

You came to me as almost a fully-grown woman. If we lived in a small community, I could never let you go outside alone. You would have the same problems you had in Waterville. Boys and men would be around you like flies around honey. They would want only one thing from you. How Gray is managing not to have sex with you shows how much he loves you. Almost any other man would have taken your virtue as soon as you were on your back."

"You have a wonderful way of picking up a girl's spirits dad. Are you going to miss me while I'm at school?"

"No, not for one minute."

"I knew you were going to say that. We are having a nice honest chat, and you had to ruin it. At least this time I was prepared for your answer. You are a terrible liar."

"I've been trying to keep that a secret from everyone since I was seven. What gave me away?"

"Repetition; every time you are supposed to complement someone, you go the other way. Sooner or later you had to get caught. I caught you."

"You're not getting your house on Maui."

"Yes I am, and you know it."

"We are not going to be here long enough to enjoy it."

"We will go to Maui every year, in December, January, and February. It gets cold here in Colorado, and it's warm in Hawaii. Did you do know they have computers in Hawaii?"

"Really, I wasn't aware of that."

"You are a terrible liar."

"If you want a house built on Maui, you better start designing it, or you will never sleep in it."

"God you are pushy."

"Maybe I should get you a laptop with a CAD program installed. Heaven knows you can't draw for shit."

"That will be $10 please."

"I will have to replay the tape of our discussion. I lost count of how much you owe the pretzel jar. I know it's at least $10."

"Go ahead dad; I'd like to listen to it also."

"I hate it when you are so smug. I'm taking you shopping tomorrow and I am buying you school clothes. All of them will have checks, stripes, or plaid designs. Gordon will love them."

"As long as we buy them at Neiman Marcus, Bloomingdale's, or Lord and Taylor's, dad, it will be fine by me."

"I'm beginning not to like you Delicious."

"I know dad, you love me."

"Who told you, I will kill him."

"It was Jennifer."

"Oh, that was nice of her wasn't it?"

"Chicken shit."

"Who me, never; I love my wife."

"You certainly do, and you certainly will, whether you want to or not."

"Young woman that was not a nice thing to say to your father even though it might be true."

"You are such a terrible liar."

"No I am not; I lie in bed very well."

"How does Jennifer take you all the time?"

"She can't, she can only take half."

"I would like to tell you that you are lying again, but Jennifer said the same thing. I'm not talking to you anymore today, and it's not because I'm angry with you. You will have the designs for our house in Maui in two days. You will have the architectural drawings for our house by the end of the week. I want to see them before I go away with Gray; is that understood father?"

"I'm sorry would you say that again; the batteries of my hearing aid must have died."

"Listen very closely father; watch out for the ball bearings on the steps leading down to the lab. They could be hazardous to your health."

"Balls; whose balls are you bearing down on?"

"When you're lying on the floor at the bottom of the steps, they will be your balls. Good night dad."

"Good Night Divine."

Jennifer and Rosalynn saw her walking towards them and they heard her yell out, "I'm going to kill you dad."

I yelled back, "Is that before or after I pay for your wedding?"

"Afterwards, naturally; why are you worried?"

"No, I was hoping to be able to see our spacecraft completed. I would love to be in it as it leaves our universe."

"I could build a compartment in the nuclear reactor for you and put you in it with food and other facilities that will keep you alive and comfortable, until we turn it on. Then you will become part of the fusion reaction. At least you will know we had just passed Jupiter."

"Yes, that would be very considerate of you, as long as I'm holding your firstborn child in my lap."

"I don't like you dad, that was an awful thing to say."

Gray said, "I liked it Even. It means I finally got the fuck her."

"That was not a very romantic way of putting it Gray. Keep talking like that and it will be the only time you get into me."

Gray replied, "Did you see the way Jennifer attacked your father when he came home from a four day trip Miss Luck? In seven months that is going to be you. I am going to enjoy every moment of it."

Delicious looked to Jennifer and Rosalynn for moral support.

I walked up behind my daughter and whispered, "Go ahead ask them; you will never get better advice from any other married woman. You had to talk Rod into getting a vasectomy so Rosalynn wouldn't get pregnant again, because she is so hot in bed.

Jen already told you about her sexploits from the time she was 13, until she became pregnant with Gordon. As soon as that happened to her, she became celibate. She knew she had to turn her life around because she was going to be a mother. I made it even worse for her, because I wanted us to wait until our wedding day to consummate our marriage.

If you want to use the word lust, that's fine with me, but passion would be better. We made love while her dress was being repaired, and I will make you a bet that is when she conceived our child. What do you think the odds are for you sweetheart? If you are not on your birth control pills the night you get married, Gray will impregnate you also. Why, because you have been sleeping with a man who adores you, since he met you at my wedding. Shortly afterwards you moved into his bedroom after he agreed not to have sex with you until your wedding night. If you believe you are not going to enjoy sex with him, as much as these two women enjoy sex with their husbands, you better get yourself into a nunnery now. If you don't enjoy it, Gray will kill you, before you get out of the bridal suite."

"In that case dad, why don't I just do it now?"

"Wasn't it your decision to wait until your wedding day?"

"Yes, it was, but I have the right to change my mind, don't I?"

"Absolutely, and nobody would ever fault you for it, except you of course."

"Why would I do that?"

"You were the one that made yourself a promise. If you don't want to wait any longer, and your body and mind agree, you go right ahead. It is no one else's business what you do in the privacy of your own bedroom. I will not love you any less. Gray will not love you any less. Jen will not love you any less. Most of all Delicious, 'You Must Not Love Yourself Any Less.' Make the decision you feel most comfortable with, and be able to smile about it the next morning. The only thing I don't want to happen is see Gray smiling and you unhappy, because you changed your mind at the last moment, but things had proceeded too far to stop."

"Are you sure you've only been a dad for four months?"

"I can have Rod show you the checks for the jet and the suite at the hotel if you like. I also bought that Woman's Clothing Stores' mortgage."

"Why in God's name did you do that?"

"As soon as we left to come back to Denver, the owner rehired the woman we told him to fire. The attorney we have working for us in Waterville is keeping an eye on that store and as soon as he saw it happen he called Rod. Rod called the bank and we made a very favorable transaction. I can't wait for the heavy snow season to happen and the owner falls behind on his mortgage. He is not going to be a happy man."

"Uncle Even, you are evil."

"Do you really think so? Two people in that business insulted my niece. They also broke the law at the same time, by refusing to serve a customer. I could have called the police and had them arrested. As long as you have enough money in your pocket to buy a single article of clothing in that store, they must serve you. It doesn't matter what color or what religion you are, if you have the money in your pocket, they have to serve you. It's in the Constitution of these United States, and they have to obey the law."

"Please don't tell me you are history major also."

"No, Political Science was my minor."

"I don't like you dad, you're too smart."

"No I'm not. I was able to finish my education, you were not. If you were able to progress normally throughout all 12 years of grade and high school, you would not be the mess you are now. You may have finished high school two or three years early and proceeded to MIT, Michigan, or Cal Poly on a full scholarship to continue your education. Your life would have proceeded normally, just like Gray's did. However, you may never have had the time or opportunity to work on your own and realize that Sir Isaac Newton was wrong. Which way do you think you would rather have gone?

Look at me, Delicious. I'm as crazy as a loon; everyone says so. However, I will be 34 years old soon. I have 47 patents to my name, and I am the youngest person ever to be nominated for a Nobel Prize in Science. I have more money in the bank then I know what to do with. I am building a spaceship to go to a planet so far away from ours; I have had to hire protection for my children and staff, because people have started shooting rockets at them and my inventions. Someone must think I am not so crazy after all.

One more thing, Gordon thinks I am smart. Coming from him that is a real compliment.

On the other hand, you keep telling me that you're not talking to me. You hate me because I'm pushing you too hard. Then you tell me to go fuck myself, and you are leaving me. I'm a bastard, because I'm paying Gray $300,000 a year, even though he is worth much more than that to me. You have no idea what I am paying you, because you never bothered to ask Rod what your bank balance is, or asked him to show you how to balance a checkbook.

If you were me, which of my children do you think I would love the most: my natural born daughter, or my soon to be adopted son? You don't have to answer that question if you don't want to, because you may be embarrassed by the answer."

Delicious put her head down as her eyes filled up with tears. She realized she had been crying a lot the last few days, and she was not happy about it.

"If I were you, I would take Gordon, because he makes you happy all the time. I make you miserable, because we fight all the time, and I have problems behaving the way you want me to."

"Do you think Rosalynn loves her firstborn anymore than she loves her last born child?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 11



"No."

"How about Rod? Would he give up a daughter to keep a son?"

"No. What are you getting at dad? You are confusing me again?"

"Why can't I love Gordon and you equally? Do you really think it matters that he is five years old and you are 17? Do you think Gordon isn't going to run into problems just like you are now? What do you think is going to happen in eight or nine years, if Brandy and Danielle are still in the picture? They are not going to want to be part of a harem. They are going to tell him to choose between them. I will guarantee you there is going to be a war between those two young girls, and regardless of what Gordon does, one of them is going to hate him forever."

Delicious laughed. "What makes you think there are only going to be two girls after him by the time he's 13?"

"If we are still here, and there are more than two girls after him, I'm raising the height of the fences. I'll put in a minefield between the house and the fence, and guard towers at all four-access points. If that doesn't keep us safe, I know this place in northern Alaska where he can hide for a while."

"I found you there."

"Are you going to give up your brother?"

"No, I guess not."

"That's very kind of you. If you'd like, you can stay home, until Gray finds an apartment downtown. You don't have to stay here; you can stay at a hotel or on the park bench, it's your choice."

"If it's okay with you dad, I'd like to stay where my clothes are."

"Where are your clothes?

"Are you starting with me again?"

"There is always that possibility. I don't know if you packed a suitcase."

"You are a terrible liar dad."

"So you're staying at the hotel?"

"No, I'm staying at home."

"I'm sure Gray will be very happy to hear that."

"How about you dad; are you happy I'm staying at home?"

"You know me Delicious; I couldn't give a shit one way or the other."

"First you owe the pretzel jar another $10. Second, you are an awful liar dad."

I smiled at my daughter, kissed her head, and said, "Yes, I am."

Delicious giggled, slapped my arm, and kissed my cheek.

I think we called a truce between us at that moment.

*********

The following morning Jennifer called her friend at the University of Colorado and made arrangements for Delicious to start taking classes a week from Monday. The only reason it worked out, was she was a non-degree seeking student. Classes started three weeks ago.

************

48. Tripping

The two armored car drivers, Jayden and Logan arrived at Even's home at 7:30 AM. They were driving a retired Secret Service black beast that had been totally reconditioned with a new engine, transmission, and every other upgrade current Secret Service armored vehicles had. Even had the armor shop put in a few extras just in case.

During their down time, Jayden and Logan went through training at an elite school specializing in close body protection for high-value targets. They learned how to drive the heavy vehicle, how to get out of road traps, and most importantly, weapons training. After the four-week course was over, they were rated extremely effective.

Using the clothing allowance Even gave them, they both showed up in business suits that effectively hid the fact they were carrying an assortment of lethal weapons to protect their clients.

Even greeted both men; "Welcome to my home gentleman; breakfast is on the table. Is there anything in particular you would like to drink?"

Jayden said, "Coffee would be very nice Mr. Luck. This is very kind of you."

"Jayden, Logan, you are now part of our family. You can expect to be treated this way every time you come here. I know, and you know you are my employees, but that doesn't matter. You know your jobs, and as long as you perform them properly, you will be treated as family, and not as objects. Please sit down and enjoy your breakfast, coffee will be ready in a few minutes."

While they were eating, and talking with Even about his priorities, Delicious walked into the kitchen wearing a skintight pair of black jeans, and a button-down blouse.

Both men stood up. Logan said, "Holy shit, we have to protect her?"

"Guys, this is my daughter Delicious. No jokes please, she has heard them all."

Both men said, "Good morning ma'am."

"Hello gentlemen, and for the time being, would you call me miss, until this idiot, who is trying to sneak up behind me, says 'I do.'"

Gray kissed her head. "When did you develop eyes in the back of your head? I used to be able to sneak up behind you, and scare you to death."

"That was before you became old and clumsy. Gentleman this is my fiancé, Dr. Grayson Thyme."

I introduced my two new employees. "Delicious, Gray, whenever you leave the house, these two men will be with you. On the right is Jayden McMichael. Standing next to him is Logan Morrison. You can feel very comfortable with both of them, because they just finished a four-week course at the Executive Training Facility in Biloxi Mississippi. They are now experts at close body protection, and if any problem arises you will do what they tell you to do without asking questions. Do you understand Delicious, without asking questions."

"I understand dad."

"Jayden, you are with Gray at all times.'

" Logan, I'm sorry, but you get my daughter."

"Thanks a lot dad."

"You're very welcome baby."

"Jayden, Gray has a few errands he has to run today in Denver. He is going to look for an apartment close to the University of Colorado, and buy a new car."

"Really Gray, what kind of car are you buying?"

"Your father is buying it for me as part of my incentive package. Do you want to guess what kind of car I'm getting, and the colors I can't buy?"

"Oh, he read you the riot act too."

"Yes he did, but I'm not buying a blue one. I'm going to get a black one."

"You're not going to get it."

"Why can't I get a black car?"

"Black Audi SUV's are so popular they keep them for the East and West coasts. In order to get one you have to special order it, and you have to wait 2 to 3 months to get it. Other dealerships won't let them go, because they are the first cars to leave their showrooms."

"So I can't buy any car that is silver, white, beige, or brown, and I can't get a black Audi for 2 to 3 months. This really sucks Even."

"It may suck Gray, but it's for free."

"Yes, there is always that to add to the equation."

Logan you can drop both of them off, bring my daughter to the bursar's office at the University of Colorado, Denver campus, and make sure she gets an admission packet. Go to their security department and introduce yourself. Show them your permits, and explain what your duties are. If they have any problems, have them contact me. I will take care of them.

Then walk Delicious around the campus so she can familiarize herself with the layout. Starting a week from Monday you will be taking her there, and watching her from a discreet distance, every moment of the day.

Delicious the first thing you will do upon leaving a classroom is to locate Logan, and make physical contact with him. I don't want you to wave from hundred feet away, I want you to walk up to him and touch his sleeve so he knows everything is fine. Okay?"

"Yes dad, I will do it every time."

"Baby, I know you think I'm overreacting, but these two men are alive only because I overreacted. If we hadn't put them into the bomb protective gear, and added extra layers of protection behind them, we would have attended their funerals. Those criminals are still out there, and until Shelby knows who did it and why, I am going to protect the two of you as best I know how."

"Who is going to protect you, Gordon, and Jennifer?"

"We will be staying very close to home, and if we have to leave, we will make arrangements for either Jayden or Logan to be with us."

"Shouldn't you hire more guards?"

"They are already in training. We should have a dozen more men and women by the beginning of the month."

"Women; how open-minded of you dad."

"You won't think so when you see one of them. She looks like a cross between Godzilla and Mothra."

"That's an awful thing to say about anyone dad."

"I'm not hiring her because she is pretty. I'm hiring her to protect Gordon."

"Oh my God, poor Gordon."

"Okay, enough chit chat. It is 8:30 A.M., grab your gear, and get on the road. All of you get back here safe this evening please."

"Do I show them where the extras are Mr. Luck?"

"No, not until you teach them how to use a weapon properly."

Gray said, "I came in fourth in the NRA handgun tryouts for the central region, and I have a federal permit to carry a gun."

Delicious glared at him. "I hate you Gray."

"Yes dear, I know."

"You can show Gray where they are hidden Jayden, and make sure he knows what he's doing with them. She doesn't touch them, until she is taught about them."

"Yes sir."

As they were leaving the house, Delicious kissed me. I was a little surprised.

"Thanks for worrying about us dad. It means you really care about our safety."

"I couldn't show favorites between the two drivers, so I had to hire both of them. I was worried about Gray's safety, and you just happen to be there. If anything happens to you, I look good in the papers because I had you guarded. They don't realize you were just incidental, I was just protecting Gray."

"You are so full of shit dad."

"I am getting better; that will be $10 please."

"You went through all that just to get $10 out of me?"

"Do you remember the last few times I tried it and failed. I was heartbroken. I'm back on track now; I feel much better."

"You are such a bad liar."

"Can't you see how happy I am now that I've have taken $10 out of your pocket? Have you looked at your financial statements yet? Can you afford the $10 or are you going to get a $35 overdraft fee attached to next month's statement?"

"I couldn't look. After Rod handed it to me, he told me not to open it because of Gordon, and then things got a little bit hectic here. I brought it up to my room and put it in my dresser. I will look at it tonight when I get home."

"Make sure that you do, because if you can't afford your birth control pills, you are going to become pregnant. If you can't afford the pills, how can you possibly afford a baby?"

"At one time I was told this would always be my home. Has that been rescinded?"

"Absolutely not, your name is on the deed, but I would hate for you to have to live in a place where you are constantly being pushed to make yourself a better person."

"You have the shortest memory of anyone I know. How are you possibly one of the greatest scientists of the modern era. I'm going to college in 10 days to try to rid myself of those fears. Do you remember anything about that?"

"You're going to college? When did that happen?"

"They are waiting for me at the car dad. I will kill you when I come back."

"Okay, that means I can get a full day's work in."

"I hate you dad."

"I hate you three times as much."

She giggled and ran to the car.

****************

While they were riding into Denver, Jayden explained the protocols to both passengers:

1. Never exit the car until either he or Logan opened the door.

2. Never exit the car on the street side.

3.If shots are fired they had choices to make:

a. If they were very close to the car get in, close and lock the doors, and get on the floor.

b. If they were close to building entrance get inside, and go to the security office.

c. If they were too far away from the car, get on the ground, and stay there, until the all clear is given.

d. If both Logan and I go down, surrender and stay alive. Whoever these people are, they are pros. They won't hurt you. They want the information you have in your heads and the people who hired them paid a great deal of money to bring you back not only alive, and unhurt.

Within minutes every law enforcement agency in the country will be looking for you. No aircraft will be allowed to take off without being searched thoroughly. No car will cross the border without being searched. This country will be locked down tighter than a drum. There may be 200 companies in this country that can use the knowledge you have between your ears Dr. Thyme. They will believe, since you have worked closely with Dr. Luck, you will know the formula that defeats gravity. I don't know if you do or not, but that's what they will believe."

Delicious was about to interrupt, when Gray kicked her. She frowned at him, but he whispered, "No." She kept quiet.

"They will interrogate both of you; deprive you of food, drink, and sleep, to break your will. When you can't take it anymore give them tidbits of good information along with minor errors. When they catch your errors tell them it's because your mind is fuzzy, because you're tired, hungry, and cold."

"Miss Delicious, they will look at your transcripts, and believe you are worthless to them, except to get information about your father and money from him. Try to act smarter than your transcripts show, but always stumble back to the grades that are indicated on your report cards. Sooner or later they will leave you alone, and concentrate on Dr. Thyme.

These people are smart, and they know their time with you will be limited; more than likely less than a week. Then they will have to get rid of you. The longer you can hold out, the better your chances of surviving are. Concentrate on staying alive by being smarter than they are. Logan and I will do everything in our power not to let this happen, but if it does, you have to be prepared to take the fight to them."

"Do you know something we don't know Jayden?"

"No sir Doc, I surely don't. However, six weeks ago someone shot a rocket up my ass and blew an armored car I was driving into little pieces. If they have access to military grade weapons, and systems that can guide them precisely into the rear doors of our trucks, I want everyone to be prepared for anything."

Logan laughed. "Just so you folks know, Jayden is the optimist, I am the worrywart."

"Did you have to tell them that? Now they are going to start worrying."

"I thought it was only fair for them to know that you always look on the bright side of the coin, while I always look on the dark side."

"You are going to have gray hair by the time your 40."

"At least I'm still going to have hair. You are going to have to go Q ball."

"You must be colorblind. Q balls are white, I am going to go 8 ball; it's black like me."

"You are calling me colorblind? Your skin is the color of half a cup of coffee mixed with half a cup of heavy cream. The best you could call yourself is Cocoa, and even that is a stretch."

"Man, are you going to start this argument with me again? They don't have a block on the voter's registration form that says Cocoa."

Delicious and Gray listened to the two men argue as they drove into Denver.

Finally Gray asked, "How long have you two known each other?"

Jayden replied, "22 years."

"It's 23 years dummy."

"My mom should've thrown your mom and you out of the house when you couldn't pay the rent on time."

"Your mom had a compassionate heart and soul. When you were born, the good Lord was smart enough to give you neither."

"I saved your ass in Iraq twice."

"You dropped a perfect pass that cost us the state championship."

"That pass was low."

"Yeah, like the films showed, it was in the bottom half of the 8 on your jersey, and there wasn't a defender within 5 yards of you."

"I did put a smooth move on that guy, didn't I?"

"You could have flattened him with a tank, and it wouldn't have mattered. You dropped the ball."

"Do they sound like my father and me, Gray?"

"No babe, they're having fun with one another, when you and your father go at it, it's all-out war."

"Oh!"

************

"Here's the real estate office you wanted sir."

Gray said, "Thank you Logan," as he began to unlock and open the door.

Jayden pressed his gun to Gray's ear. "If you try that again sir, you and I are going to dance."

"Dance?"

"Yes sir, like in the boxing ring. What is rule number one?"

"Rule number one, uhhmm... Never leave the car until one of you opens the door."

Delicious applauded.

"Very funny baby, I can't wait until you break one of the rules, and see what they do to you."

"My face still tingles from the last time you and I 'danced'."

"Would you still be here if we didn't?"

"I guess we'll never know, will we?"

"Good luck in school today." He kissed her, and waited for Jayden to open his door.

"Is there a protocol for what I'm supposed to do now?"

"Yes; as soon as you exit the car, you walk briskly to the entrance of the establishment you intend to enter. I will close the door to the car, and be a few feet behind you. The less time you are in the open the better."

He walked in to the real estate office and the receptionist asked how she might help him.

"I need an apartment in the area of the University of Colorado. Three or four bedrooms, 4000 to 5000 ft.², furnished if you have."

"One moment sir, I'll bring an agent up front to help you. Would you like coffee or soft drink?"

"No thank you, I am on a short leash, time wise, and I need to get this completed quickly. If you don't have anything in the range I am asking for, tell me immediately, and I will move on to another agency that does."

"Yes sir, I will be right back." She hurried to the rear of the office and spoke with the manager.

"Elizabeth, we have a live one. 4000 to 5000 ft.², three or four bedrooms furnished or not. It sounds like he wants it yesterday. He has a bodyguard with him, so I don't think money is a problem. He's perfect for the new high-rise by the University. Get out there before he leaves."

********

"Hello sir, I am Elizabeth Vargas, my secretary did not get your name."

"Dr. Grayson Thyme, ma'am. Do you have what I need or should I leave and go to another agency."

"There are only two buildings in the University area that comply with your requests. The closest is a relatively new high-rise. It would be the four-bedroom penthouse suite on the 16th floor. It lists for $14,000 a month.

The other building is in the financial area, and is also a four-bedroom suite, but it is on two floors. It lists for $17,600 per month."

"How long has the penthouse by the University been empty?"

"According to my search, it has never been occupied."

"Verify this unit has never been occupied. Then offer them a one-year contract, at $11,000 a month paid in advance, with an option for two more years if I am satisfied with the unit. This is a one-time offer, otherwise tell them I am taking the unit in the financial district."

"Don't you want to see it first?"

"That won't be necessary; give them a call please."

"I will do it right now Dr. Thyme."

Vargas called the leasing agent at Trident Towers and made the offer after verifying the unit had never been occupied. A man at the other end of the phone laughed at the offer.

Vargas said, "Your building has been up for three years, it is only 72% occupied, and no one has ever made a bid for the penthouse apartment because your pricing is unrealistic. Dr. Thyme is a very busy man. If you do not say yes now, I am calling the Financial Center, and making a bid on the two-story penthouse apartment. Make up your mind, is it yes, or no?"

The leasing agent didn't say anything as he was thinking the bid over. 15 seconds passed, when Vargas said, "I take it the answer is no, goodbye."

"Don't hang up, I will take the offer. How soon does he want to occupy the unit?"

"When would you like to occupy the unit Dr. Thyme?"

"If it's possible, one week from Friday."

Vargas repeated the answer and the leasing agent said the apartment would be freshly painted, and everything cleaned before he was ready to move in.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 12



There is no sex in this chapter. 

Chapter 12 

Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. The scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

DEAR READERS: From this point in the story on, I will not only be jumping months, but sometimes years at a time in order to speed up the process of scientific advancement, and the building of the spacecraft. To do otherwise would continue this story until I turned 80, or died. I did not want to put you or me through this trauma. So if you think you missed something important between two paragraphs, or a chapter, you probably did not, because it was a time jump. I will try to lead you through these paragraphs by saying, "one month later, or two years later, etc." I hope you enjoy this chapter, because I finally got the scientific materials I needed from the University of Miami to begin the nuts and bolts process of building this special machine. Thank you very much. P_D10 

***** 

49. FIRST'S and LAST'S 

The weekend was wild. Delicious was out of her mind with joy. Being officially engaged to Gray was the most wonderful thing that happened to her, since she found out Even was her father. She could not help looking at the ring on her finger every time she moved her hand. Anytime she passed one of her family members she would say "LOOK!" She seemed like a brand-new person, but I knew this would pass. 

Instead of having a family dinner; I sent Delicious and Gray to the most exclusive nightclub in Denver for some alone time. If you consider yourself being alone, with two bodyguards standing 60 feet away from you, watching for any possible threat to your person, then they were alone. 

When I watched Delicious walk down the stairs, I was ready to commit murder. With a fake smile plastered on my face I asked, "Darling who bought you that dress?" 

"You did dad, don't you remember? It was one of the dresses you purchased for me in Waterville." 

I grimaced. "You must have grown since then, because there is an awful lot of skin showing." 

Delicious laughed at me. "Dad, it's all the running I have been doing with Gray. The baby fat has turned into muscle, and it's moved into all the right places. Do you like my shoes?" 

I looked down and saw she was wearing the 5-inch spiked heels she could not walk in when we were at the department store. She did a pirouette for me, and I knew Jennifer was going to be in for a long night with me. My daughter was her name personified; she looked "Glorious." She was what every young woman desired to be when they grew up. My baby sure looked grown up tonight. I was so happy she was going out with Gray, with any other man I would have canceled their dinner. 

Gray came down looking very sharp. Black boots, jeans, and polo shirt under a white linen shirt, with crystal studs and cufflinks. To top it off he put on a black Stetson hat. Where he had all this stuff stored, I had no idea. 

Delicious looked at him enviously. "You are not allowed to look prettier than I am." 

In a Texas drawl he replied, "Ma'am, no one in the great state of Texas looks prettier than you are." 

"Good answer Gray. Jayden, Logan are you ready to go?" 

"They are already by the car waiting for you baby." 

"Good night dad, do not wait up." She kissed me and was out the door before I could reply. 

"Good night Even, I will take good care of her. She has three bodyguards around her tonight, not two. I am carrying my gun just in case." 

"Do not shoot her or yourself in the foot please." 

"I am a better shot than that Even. There is no bullet in the chamber, and the safety is on." 

"Stay safe, and remember she can't drink. Have a great time Gray." 

"She is going to kill me, because you said that." 

"I'd rather she kill you, then wind up in jail for underage drinking." 

"She would be indicted for murder Even." 

"I would get it reduced to justifiable homicide. You would be trying to get her drunk to have your way with her." 

"I cannot win, can I?" 

I smiled. "Good night Gray, she is probably wondering where you are." 

************* 

Jayden opened the door. Gray exited the car, extending his hand to help Delicious out. The line to get into the club stretched down the street, but the four of them walked straight in. 

Jayden and Logan's heads were on swivels looking for any possible threat to them. Delicious and Gray's table was the best in the house. They had easy access to the dance floor, and their waiter was constantly in their view. 

He had a French accent and Gray spoke to him in fluent French. He ordered their dinners, a bottle of wine, and a bottle of sparkling water. 

Delicious said, "I hate you Gray." 

"What did I do wrong this time?" 

"You speak French." 

"Of course I speak French, I also speak Spanish. I took both languages in high school and college. They were easy elective courses. Everything else was science and math. Let's relax and have a good time please. Would you like to dance?" 

"I do not know how to dance." 

"Dancing is organized walking. Come with me, and I'll show you how it's done." 

"Please don't make me look like an idiot out there." 

"The only thing you are going to look like tonight is hot. Do you see all the men looking at you? I am the luckiest man in this club. I am the envy of every man, and most of the women here. The men are not paying attention to their women; they are looking at you. Watch their heads turn as we walk to the dance floor." 

She did watch, and he was right. It was like the day she prepared for her dad's wedding. Her hair was up, her makeup was perfectly applied, and her dress was short. According to her dad there was a lot of skin showing in all the right places. Now if Gray could show her how to dance, without her falling on her face in those 5-inch heels, everything would be great. 

As he turned to face her, and put his arms around her, he asked, "Did you grow?" 

"Yes, my dad's been injecting me with HGH, and it is working." 

"He has to know how dangerous that stuff is. You are already tall for a girl." 

"If I am tall for a girl, why do you always call me Shorty?" 

"I know it pisses you off, but it gets you to talk to me. Sometimes getting you to open up is like pulling teeth. I think you would be toothless by now, and I would be working on your fingernails trying to get you to answer me." 

"Maybe the person I am talking to has nothing interesting to say." 

"Let's not argue, let's dance." He pulled her close, extremely close, and began to move to the music. 

"Loosen up baby; I am not going to throw you off the dance floor. Smile and relax, look at the people around us. See how much fun they are having. Just follow along with me, and by the end of this evening you will be dancing on your own." 

She did follow him, and looked at the other women following their men. Some women were leading their men around the floor. What surprised her most was saying women leading other beautiful women around the dance floor. One thing was for certain, they were having a wonderful time; by the end of the evening she was too. 

It was almost 3 AM when Gray carried her up the steps, and into their bedroom. He lay her down on their bed and began undressing her. It was a terrible job, but someone had to do it. When he took off her shoes, and looked at her feet, he knew she would not be running with him for a few days. They were full of blisters. He shook his head. "Women and their high heel shoes; whoever thought up these things was a masochist." 

He undid the side zipper on her dress, rolled her slightly to the left, and pulled it off with no resistance. He returned to her side, removed her thigh high stockings, but left the thing she was wearing called panties on her. They were an exaggeration of the name. It was two strings attached to a tiny piece of cloth in front. 

Oh how beautiful she is, he groaned, as she lay there before him. He took off his clothes and hung them up neatly. He was standing next to her; naked, painfully erect and hard as steel. 

"Delicious, you have no idea how much I want you. If you were any other woman I would be in you, pounding away, until we were both sexually exhausted. I need a very long, very cold shower to calm down before I join you in bed. I will be back later, probably around noon." 

He put his robe on, and turned to leave the room. 

She peaked through her eyelids and said, "Would you like some company?" 

He whipped around, startled. "You bitch; you have been lying there, looking so innocent, and you were awake all this time? You've been teasing me to the limits of my endurance, and you are laughing at me. You are so getting spanked tonight." 

"You cannot touch me; you need a cold shower first. There is no telling what you might do, before or after you spank me." 

"So you do realize I am going to spank you." 

"Yes; I wanted to give you something for everything you gave me this week. I couldn't think of anything that would give you as much pleasure as you gave me. So I decided I should give you ME." 

"You are evil, but I love evil people who think like you. Stand up. What is it called?" 

"It's a Brazilian panty." 

"If it cost more than $.50 you got robbed." 

"This cost $18." 

"Make sure you leave it to someone in your Will, when we leave this planet. It has to be ecologically friendly." 

"If you make fun of my panties, you are not going to be allowed to spank me." 

"You are making this more fun every minute; plus you lied to me tonight." 

"When did I lie to you?" 

"You said you grew, because your father was giving you HGH shots. You were wearing 5-inch heels, and your feet are full of blisters. Do you want to take your punishment easily, or do you want to argue over it?" 

"Let's argue." 

Gray reached into his drawer and pulled out a sock. He dangled it in front of her face. 

Delicious opened her eyes as wide as they could go. 

"You wouldn't dare do that to me." 

"It is almost 3:30 A.M. I don't want you to wake up Gordon or your parents. This goes in your mouth. The tie for my robe goes around to your arms to keep you where you belong. Your ass is going to be pink by morning." 

She tried to crawl off the bed, but Gray had her around her ankles before she could get away. He pulled her off the bed. As she screamed, he stuffed the sock into her mouth. He grabbed her arms, pulled them behind her back, and secured her elbows together, with the tie from his robe. As soon as he completed that task, he rested her knees on the floor, with the top of her body lying on the bed. 

He whispered in her ear, "We will go for 20." 

Through her gag she screamed, "Mmmwwyy?" 

"Yes, 20, and don't forget to count. If you forget to count, we will start all over again." 

He did not hit her rapidly. He let her think about the pain each blow caused her, before the next one landed. As he continued her torture, she noticed each one was moving towards her center. 

He wouldn't dare her there, would he? That would be too cruel. If it was so cruel, why was she leaking so badly? Damn it, if you are going to hit me there, hurry up and do it already. Don't keep me wondering if you are going to do it, or not, it's not fair. 

In her muffled cry she yelled out, "You cunning bastard, Hit Me!" 

"You stopped counting baby. We have to start all over again." 

She screamed violently through the sock, "No, hit me, hit me there dammit." 

Gray said, "I'm sorry I can't understand a word you're saying. We have to start all over." 

"FUCK YOU, HIT ME!" 

"Did you just ask me to hit you?" 

She nodded her head vigorously, and yelled again, "HIT ME!" 

"Do you need some help with something?" 

"HIT ME YOU BASTARD, BEFORE I KILL YOU!" 

"Did you just call me a bastard?" 

She nodded her head. 

"Why would I do something wonderful for you, if you are angry with me?" 

"If you don't hit me, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" 

"I think you said you were going to kill me; is that right?" 

She was nodding her head vigorously, unaware his right hand was moving down as fast as he could move it, until it made contact with her Brazilian panties, and the sensitized flesh it covered. 

She screamed; her body went rigid, and it looked like she was peeing on the floor. After a moment, her body went slack, and she lost her battle with consciousness. 

Gray released her arms, and put her on the bed. He went to the bathroom, filled a cup with water, wet a towel, and brought dry towels with him. She had not moved when he returned. 

His first order of business was to remove the Brazilian panties. It was a really tough chore. It didn't surprise him that they were soaked, but so was her entire lower body. 

He pulled the sock from her mouth, and gave her a sip of water to wet her mouth. He began to wash the perspiration off her face very gently. He was very aware of the greeting he would receive when she woke up. He continued toweling her face until her lashes started to move. 

When he saw her eyes he said, "Hello in there." 

Her eyes went from dreamy to evil in a flash. "How could you be so mean?" 

"I was not being mean, you stopped counting." 

"How could I continue counting when my brains were between my thighs?" 

"I didn't know that, I was giving you a spanking." 

"Gray when was the last time you told me a lie, and got away with it?" 

"Never." 

"Do you think you just got away with that one?" 

"I don't believe so." 

"Why don't you try something new? Tell me the truth the first time, and maybe I will not try to beat the shit out of you for lying to me." 

"You know you can't beat the shit out of me. You know you can't out run me, and you know you can't out shoot me. What do I have to be afraid of from you?" 

"Poisonous spiders in your shoes, snakes in your bed, arsenic in your food, accidents in the lab, mud in the barrel of your gun, ants in your underwear...." 

"Okay, I get the message, I'll tell you the truth, most of the time." 

"Why can't you tell me the truth all the time? It's a great way for a relationship to be based on 'Truth, and Trust." 

"Can I trust you?" 

"If I ever betray your trust, you can kill me. I'll put that in writing and give it to Rod. I won't ask you that question, because I know I can trust you. I was lying here, and as far as you knew I was unconscious. You could have fucked me six ways from Tuesday, or up the ass, before I could have stopped you. You didn't. If that's not trust I don't know what is." 

"I knew you were awake." 

"I thought you were going to tell me the truth." 

"I said most of the time." 

Gordon knocked on their door. "Are you two ever going to go to sleep? You were making so much noise you woke me up." 

Delicious said, "I'm sorry Gordon. Gray and I had such a good time at the nightclub tonight; we've been going over and over it. I'm sorry we woke you up." 

"If you had such a good time, why was he spanking you?" 

Thinking quickly she said, "He thought I lost the ring." 

"I would have been angry with you too; good night." 

"Good night Gordon, I'll see you in the morning." 

"When do we move into our apartment?" 

"We move in in six days; four of those days we are going to be in Houston." 

"I think I'll ask Rosalynn and Jennifer to do a little shopping for us. They have excellent taste." 

*********** 

"You're quitting, and going to work for that idiot?" 

"Steven be nice, this is that idiot's daughter, Delicious. She is my fiancée." 

"You get yourself a nice piece of ass, and you're leaving NASA to go to work for him?" 

"Gray, please may I? I know I promised to be good, but he just crossed the line." 

"If he says one more thing out of line, go ahead babe." 

"That little bitch thinks she can take me?" 

"Steven, you should've kept her mouth closed. Go ahead dear." 

Delicious was all over him like a rash. His glasses flew off his face as her shoulder crashed into his head. His new hair plugs disappeared as she grabbed his hair while vaulting over his back. Her nails drew blood, from his face and neck. It looked as if he was bleeding from his carotid artery, as his white lab coat turned bright red. If coworkers had not called security, she may have broken his legs and his arms. She had Steven face down on the floor, as she was trying to have his arms and legs exchange places. 

Gray stood there laughing. It took three guards to get Delicious off him, and she was still struggling to get at him. 

The head of security, the assistant director for the Orion project, two of Gray's superiors, and the medics were called to straighten out this mess. 

"Gray what the hell happened in here?" 

"I don't want to prejudice these proceedings. I think you should ask Steven what happened, and then I'll tell you the truth." 

"You know Steven is going to lie to us." 

"There is no doubt in my mind he's going to lie through his teeth and ass to try to get out of this. I'm going to take Delicious out of this room so Steven can tell you what went on in private. Then I will come back in here alone, and tell you what Steven told you. Then I will have my fiancée come in and tell you what really happened." 

"Steven, I'm going to allow this meeting to proceed as Gray has asked. It will be interesting to see how close to your testimony his is. Gray, Miss Delicious, will you leave us alone for little while please" 

"Steven we are going to record everyone's testimony for the record. Do you want an attorney present?" 

He thought for a moment, and said, "Yes I do." 

"Steven, you are on paid administrative leave, until this affair is settled." 

"Michael, would you ask those two to come back in please." 

"That was very quick Aubrey what happened?" 

"I asked Steven if he want an attorney present, and he said yes. In my book that means he's as guilty as hell. I need to hear from you what happened. Your testimony is being recorded. I would like to hear a complete and honest version of the events please." 

"Delicious and I have an agreement; we will only tell the truth, and trust in each other. I will tell you the truth, and trust in your judgment. 

I came in here today to hand in my papers to resign. I have been offered a position, which I have accepted, to work with Doctor Even Luck on his spaceship to go to another part of our universe, using engines that do not require the use of a liquid hydrogen and oxygen mixture. I have seen the engines in action, and they work. I was as amazed as you will be in 10 years when the patents are handed over, free of charge, to a major university. 

When I told Steven I was leaving, he insulted Doctor Luck and then called Delicious an obscene name. My future bride asked me permission to go after him, which I refused. He said to me, "Do you think that bitch can take me?" 

Steven again maligned Doctor Luck's name, and then called my fiancé a vile and insulting name. I took her purse and gave her my permission to take him apart. I stood back, and watched Steven get his ass kicked into last week. I would have stopped the beating he was getting, just before she broke his neck, which he really deserved for being such a horse's ass." 

"The engines work?" 

"Yes sir, no doubt about it. The inventor is absolutely amazing in every way possible. I can't tell you who it is because I signed an NDA, but if that person ever patented that engine, there is not enough money in the world to pay for that design. It is beautiful beyond belief." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 12



"You're taking 60 to 80 people to another part of our universe in 10 years. We are building a new rocket, which may or may not be ready in four to six years. Orion is almost ready now. Should we scrub everything and wait for the new engines? 

Orion can only take four people, and it will take 46 days to get to Mars. Your group is taking a minimum of 60 people, and passing Mars in one hour. We're spending $1 trillion on our project, and you are spending, at most, $350 billion on yours. There something wrong with this equation." 

"I thought we were in here talking about Steven." 

"Steven is going to get sensitivity training, and psychological counseling. I think he's cracking under the strain of working here. I don't want to fire him, because he's done a lot of good work for us in the past. He also has a family to support. We'll see if we can help him, but if we can't, he's history." 

"You were always fair Aubrey. I'll finish turning in my paperwork and then I'm going to take this young lady out to dinner." 

"Gray the next time you come here with armed guards, please let us know in advance. When the guards at the gate so your man reaching into his pocket for his identification and saw the weapon they nearly killed him. They don't fool around here." 

"Aubrey, I called last Friday and told them we were coming with two security agents. You can check the call logs." 

"Oh well, no system is perfect." 

******* 

50. A PAIN IN THE CLASS 

When they walked into the apartment at 5:30 Saturday afternoon they were stunned. Not only was the apartment painted, but it was fully furnished, and the entire family was there to greet them. 

"Surprise!" 

Delicious thought the walls would be white but they weren't. Jennifer grabbed her arm and dragged her into the center of the living room. 

"Do you like it?" 

"Like it, I'm stunned. I thought everything would be a bland white; but this is so beautiful. Who thought of baby blue walls?" 

Rosalynn yelled, "Guess who's having a baby boy?" 

Delicious looked at Jennifer, who was wearing a big grin. 

"It's a boy?" 

"Yes, the Doctor took a sonogram Wednesday. The little sucker has a thing between its legs that little girls don't have." 

Delicious hugged and congratulated her. Then she remembered; "Where's Gordon?" 

"I'm here." 

"You're going to have a little brother to run around with. What do you think about those apples?" 

"What does having a little brother have to do with apples?" 

"Gordon, I think I'll tickle you." 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" 

"I've got you now." 

"I hope you lose your ring, so Gray can spank you again." 

Gray turned, and walked into the kitchen, while trying not to laugh. Delicious turned bright red. 

"I'm going to get you for that one little man." 

"When I am 17 I hope I'm taller than you are so I can call you Shorty like Gray does." 

"I will still be your older sister. You have to be nice to me." 

"Is that written down somewhere; is it a rule? You keep telling dad you don't like him, and he's older than you are." 

"You tell her son, you keep her on the straight and narrow." 

"You were doing so well dad when you kept quiet. Try to keep up the good work." 

"Gray is not the only one that can spank you for losing that ring." 

"I knew this day was going too good for me." 

Delicious walked over to me, sat on my lap, and kissed me. "Did you hear what happened in Houston?" 

"Yes I did. A mutual friend of ours called me from Austin. He's getting ready to retire, and his son Shelby is getting ready to take over. He told me you really took that man to the cleaners. Eight stitches on his neck, not bad for a little girl." 

"I am not a little girl." 

"Why do you get so upset when anybody says that to you? It's a compliment. It's a term of endearment. It's a loving anecdote. It's like a grandmother, who is 4'11" tall, says to her grandson, who 6'6" tall, come here baby. If everyone reacted the way you do, family members would never be talking to one another." 

"Okay dad, I get the picture; no one ever explained that to me before. I thought they were insulting me because I was not as tall as they were." 

"I call you baby a lot, are you still a baby?" 

"No." 

"It's the same thing. Gray calls you baby. It's a term of endearment, a term of affection. Shorty sometimes could be demeaning, but most of the time it's just meant in fun. You will know the difference. Are you ready for school Monday?" 

"Yes everything is in the car ready to go." 

"Did you ever open your financial package?" 

"God, I'm an idiot." 

"Go into your bedroom now, and don't come out until you finished reading it. It shouldn't take you more than 5 minutes to understand what you have. You wouldn't want the check for your birth control pills to bounce. Gray can help you with your checkbook for the first few months, but after that I expect you to do it by yourself." 

"Okay, I'll be right back." 

After she closed the door to the master bedroom, I said to everyone, "In a short while my daughter is going to scream. There may be several screams. Then she will charge out of the bedroom looking for me. I am going to hide behind my attorney. It is his job to protect me from everything. Today he is going to protect me from my daughter. Good luck Rod." 

"What's going on Even?" 

"She's going to look at her financial statements." 

"She's just doing that now? She's had them for over 10 days. What has she been doing with them?" 

I was about to answer him, when the first scream came out of the room. 

Rod said, "Oh Shit!" 

"Remember Rod, protect me." 

"Roz, kids, we're leaving, hurry." 

A second third and fourth scream came and the bedroom. The door opened immediately thereafter. Gray stuck his head out of the kitchen, but that the only part of his body he exposed. 

I was worried, because she didn't run at me. She walked towards me methodically and menacingly. From 10 feet away she said, "$60 an hour my ass, you lied to me." 

"You should've checked your checkbook," I said nonchalantly, keeping Rod between her and me. 

"Don't you try to worm your way out of this. None of this would have happened if you told me the truth." 

"None of this would have happened if you took care of your own finances." 

"I didn't know how." 

"You designed a nuclear reactor without any help. I think you could have balanced your checkbook by yourself." 

"I didn't think I was making enough money to worry about my checkbook." 

"It's a perfect way to start learning how. You start small and you work your way up. Very few people in this world start at the top and work their way down." 

"You're a pain in the ass dad." 

"If that isn't the pot calling the kettle black, I don't know what is." 

"I'm making more money a year then Gray?" 

"Who designed the engines? Not one, or two, but three engines. Two of which have never been heard of before. Who should get paid more; you or Gray?" 

From the kitchen he yelled, "Gray should make more money, he has more experience." 

She opened her mouth, but before she could speak I yelled, "Censor it, there are children here." 

She closed her mouth, took a second to breathe and relax. "Thanks dad that would have been ugly. Gray darling, I'll talk to you later." 

"I'll be available a week from next Wednesday." 

"You may be available many, many more days than that dear." 

********* 

Math: Mathematical Theory of Relativity 

Einstein's Space-Time/Minkowski's Space Time Theory. 

Doctor Riverdale 

Her first two-hour class started Monday, at 10 AM. 

She walked into class early, and handed her paperwork to Doctor Riverdale who was incensed by a student who showed up in his class, nearly 4 weeks behind schedule. 

He said, "You will never be able to catch up on the work we have done in class already." 

In her own style she replied, "Sir, I am so far ahead of you, you will not catch up with me." 

The entire class laughed at the exchange of insults." 

Riverdale put an equation on the board and told her to solve it. 

She didn't bother going through all the steps required. She looked at it, put down the answer, and handed him the purple marker. 

"Next time, put something hard on the board." 

He asked, "Who the hell are you?" 

"You have my paperwork, you figure it out." 

She took her seat in the back of the classroom, while Doctor Riverdale perused her paperwork again. "Miss Luck, are you related to Doctor Even Luck?" 

"Yes, I'm a very closely related to Doctor Luck; he's my father." 

"Why do you only have a GED diploma?" 

"I didn't like school." 

"Okay, let's continue with our class work." 

Delicious listened, took notes, and by the end of the class she was ready to blow a gasket. She waited her turn to talk to Doctor Riverdale and when she did she said, "You and I have to talk. You are teaching things that are out of date. I will show you what I mean, but you will have to sign an NDA before you can't say a word about where you got the information." 

"Miss Luck, the book I am teaching from is only two years old. It can't possibly be out of date." 

"Three patents have been filed in the last six weeks that will prove you are wrong." 

"Your father has been at it again?" 

"I can't answer that until you sign the nondisclosure agreement." 

"I can see this is going to be a fun semester." 

"It is going to be a boring semester for me Doctor Riverdale." 

********* 

She left the classroom, went directly to Logan, and touched his sleeve to let him know everything was fine. 

"Shall we go to lunch; my next class is at 2 PM." 

Logan replied, "Wherever you go, I go." 

"Doesn't that get a little boring after a while?" 

"Considering what your father is paying us, I will take the boredom every time." 

"How is Jayden doing with Marcia?" 

"He is infatuated with her, and Marcia is head over heels with him. Gray was right. In a few weeks, maybe a month; he will buy her a ring and propose to her. I never thought I would see the day that big lug would hit the dust." 

"What about you, is there a Miss Right waiting out there for you?" 

"I have found several miss rights, but I was always in the right place at the wrong time. Every time I fell in love, my company was sent overseas. When I came back, miss right was married to someone else. It happened three times, during our three tours in Iraq. I'm still looking. Now that I have a stable job, maybe it will happen again." 

"Keep your eyes open on campus, a lot of girls like older men; just like me." 

"Just in case you've forgotten, you're taken." 

"You know what I mean Logan." 

*********** 

She sat alone in the cafeteria, at a large round table eating her lunch. It didn't take long for her classmates to fill the table. They started asking her questions about their class, and then they asked her if she would like to join their study group. 

She liked talking with her fellow classmates, and decided college might be fun after all. 

********** 

Logan was trailing her by 20 yards, when he spied a young man taking an interest in her. She was walking to her second class, which was across the quadrangle, and he was cutting across the grass, at a fast pace, on it intercepting angle. 

He closed to within 10 yards of her. 

When he was close enough, he slowed to a fast walk, adjusted his angle, took out his cell phone, and made believe he was talking. He bumped into her, and the books fell all over the ground. 

Logan stopped, looked around to see if anyone else was in the area that concerned him, and there was none. He kept his hand on his weapon and watched to see how it would play out. 

"I'm so sorry. I was on the phone, and I wasn't paying attention. Let me get these books for you." 

Delicious shook her head. "Don't you know that's the oldest line that's ever been used?" 

He made believe he didn't hear her as he looked at her legs, covered by a short blue denim skirt, white socks, and white tennis shoes. He picked up her book, and handed them to her. "Hi, I got them all. My name is Jerry Washington, what's yours?"  

"Hello Jerry, my name is Delicious Luck, and I am off-limits to you and your kind. I am engaged to be married." To emphasize that point she held up her left hand and showed him her engagement ring. 

He looked at it, and smiled. "I bet you say that to all the boys, because you are so beautiful. I bet that ring is a fake." 

"If you call an $100,000 ring fake, then I guess it's an expensive fake. Are you going to continue to annoy me?" 

"I always get what I want, and today I want you." 

"Do you have $10?" 

"Yes I do." 

"Take it at of your wallet, and hold it in your hand." 

He did as she asked. 

"What happens now, Delicious?" 

"I will bet you that $10 bill I can get you to run away from me in less than 30 seconds. I will not scream, I will not yell at you, and I will not touch you in any way." 

"What happens if you lose?" 

"You can take me out on a date." 

"You are on Princess." 

She turned her head and called out, "Logan, this boy is annoying me." 

Logan was by her side in an instant. His gun was in his hand, and his face an inch away from Jerry Washington's face. 

Delicious took the $10 bill from Jerry's hand, and said. "Goodbye." 

He took off like a jackrabbit. 

"What did he want miss?" 

"He said he always got what he wanted, and today he wanted me. I bet him $10 I could get to leave in 30 seconds. I don't believe I'll be seeing Jerry again. Here's the $10, you earned it." 

"No thanks Miss Delicious; keep the money as a memory of your first victory over an obnoxious college boy." 

"Do you think I should get it framed and hang it on the bedroom wall?" 

"If you keep wearing short skirts to school, you're going to need a very large frame. Did you notice all the other girls are wearing jeans and slacks?" 

"I'll wear slacks when it gets cold. It's much too nice now to cover my legs." 

"Believe me the young men here don't mind seeing your legs." 

"Flatterer." 

"You don't want to be late for your next class; let's put a move on it." 

************* 

Engineering: 

Aerospace Vehicle Design and Performance: Aircraft Wing Design, Cruise Performance, Propulsion Systems, Stability Controls. 

Rocket: Launch Systems, Propulsion Units, Staging Systems, Spacecraft Subsystems, Team Designs, and Laboratory Experiments, Recovery Vehicle Systems, Reentry Profile, Parachute Explosive Systems 

Doctor Jerome 

She walked into the classroom five minutes early, and found a young man writing on the whiteboard. She waited for him to finish, then asked him where the professor was. 

"The professor is in her office. I am her teaching assistant, I'm teaching the class today." 

Her fuse was lit. "This is bullshit. I know more about this subject than you do. If the professor is not going to teach the class this semester, I want to know it now so I can change classes. Find her and bring her in here now." 

"You can go to her office and speak to her." 

"No, this is where she is supposed to be. The literature says she is supposed to be teaching this class, not you. This is where she is supposed to be, and she will meet me here. If she doesn't she will be fired. I will make sure of it." 

"I will speak with Doctor Jerome, I'll be right back." 

A few moments later, a dark-haired woman stormed into the room looking for her. 

Delicious was at the whiteboard correcting what the young man had written down and changing the formulae for the position and shape of the airfoil of the winglet. This couldn't be done without the use of a computer, and a wind tunnel. It wasn't possible, but this teenager was doing just that. Instead of sweeping the winglet up, as most engineers and scientists believed was the perfect way to reduce drag, and wake turbulence, she swept it down. As she finished her formulae, and checked her work, it showed a 14% reduction in drag, a 6% increase in lift, a 33% reduction in wake turbulence and an eight % reduction in fuel expenditures over the upward position of the winglet. She turned around to go to her desk and saw Doctor Jerome sitting in it. 

"I'm sorry I didn't know you were here. Why aren't you teaching this class instead of that dummy? He couldn't write the formulae down correctly." 

"Who are you?" 

"My name is Delicious Luck. This is my first day in class. I have my paperwork ready for you." She reached into her backpack and handed her the forms. 

"Miss Luck, William is my teaching assistant, he is one of my graduate students, and I allow him to teach some of my classes. He does a fine job." 

"When he teaches does he get paid, and you get docked for not teaching?" 

"No he does not get paid, and no I do not get docked for not teaching." 

"This is a state school, and you are getting paid by tax dollars?" 

"Yes that is correct." 

"I will be calling the state attorney's office when I leave here today. I will find out if this is a systemic problem, and see if this happens with every professor in every state college system. If it does the professors will be in jail for collecting monies they did not earn. This is a fraud upon the people of the state of Colorado. They are paying you to teach not to sit on your asses in your office, and have some kid, who doesn't know what he's doing, teach for you. If I had not corrected what he put on the board, these students would have left here today with incorrect information ingrained in their memories. I'm 17 years old, and I know more than he does. Shit, I probably know more than you do. In 20 years there will be no wings, no more noise, or air from fossil fuel engines on aircraft, and space travel will as easy as it was on Star Trek." 

"Miss Luck what mental institution did you escape from?" 

"Don't insult me Doctor Jerome. Did you listen to the news conference that was held two weeks ago today? Did you hear President Atwater proclaim there were engines that were going to take us out of this atmosphere without using a hydrogen oxygen mixture?" 

"Yes I did, and they were full of garbage." 

"Do you see this ring on my finger? It was given to me by Doctor Grayson Thyme. We are going to be married next July. Until last Monday he worked for NASA on the Orion project. He quit his job there, and is now working with my father because he has seen the engines work, and he knows our spaceship will work. The engines are a fact of life already Doctor, we have already made them. Two have been patented; the third will be given to a major university, because they had the answer in their hands, but discarded it, because they didn't believe Newton could be wrong. 

Have you ever heard of a Doctor Joseph Oyster, from the California Institute of Technology? If you haven't, he is in charge of the Programing and Thrusters Controls on Orion. We fixed the thruster problem for him in a few hours. They had been working on that problem for three years, and could not find out where they were going wrong. Since we had access the entire Orion program, we decided to go through it. If it weren't for my family; my father, my five-year-old brother, and I, those four astronauts would have died before they passed the moon outbound. Their program was wrong and their Cray 5 computer didn't pick it up. They put nearly $60 Billion into that program, and they would have killed four astronauts before they traveled 100,000 miles. We found seven flaws in it, and each one led to a catastrophic failure of the capsule. 

The most obvious flaw was in the life-support systems. Two of them were short-circuited and were running at the same time. They would have failed when they were on the outbound trajectory from Earth towards Mars. The third one would have failed before they passed the moon. All three life-support systems would have failed with no warning. NASA would have had four dead astronauts on their hands, and no one would have known why. If you want to verify what I'm saying, call Doctor Oyster at Caltech, and ask him. He was at my father's wedding. The next day he was with my dad, and played a simulation with the thrusters. He was like a kid in a candy store, because it was the first time they worked properly. He was so giddy; he picked up my little brother and kissed him dozens of times. We gave him the flash drives with the updated programming, and after he signed the NDA my father allowed him to see the new engines working. He was as amazed as the world will be in 10 years when our ship leaves Earth and heads for the stars at close to light speed. Doctor Oyster should be enough independent verification to prove to you that I'm not lying." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 12



"Why did they send you to college, if you know this stuff already?" 

"They wanted me to rest, and mingle with kids my own age." 

"They didn't want you to burn out." 

"Let's just say I was a little argumentative." 

"If there are no wings, how are you going to create lift?" 

"I'm sorry, I can't answer that question. You will have to look to Sir Isaac Newton for that answer." 

"Which of his three laws did you counteract?" 

"My father will spank me if I open my big mouth again." 

The 37 kids, if you can call 18 to 20-year-olds kids, in the class laughed at the thought of being spanked. 

Delicious turned to them and smiled. "At least he doesn't take my pants down anymore." 

That statement caused the entire class to lose control, and not only did they laugh, but they made crude statements, yelled, and applauded, until Doctor Jerome brought them back to order. She sent William to her office to continue what she was doing, and began teaching the class. 

Delicious sat in the first row, directly in front of her desk. It wasn't by choice, but necessity. There were only two desks available, and both were together in the first row. Doctor Jerome told her she felt intimidated by her sitting there. 

At the end of the two-hour class Delicious said, "You do know I am only auditing your class. I am a non-degree seeking student." 

"Please tell me you're joking with me. If you're not, I'm going to kill you, and then kill myself. I did not see that on your admission form." 

"I'm telling you the truth. I don't know how long I'm going to be here. We are waiting for the results of the stress tests to come back, from Schneider Industries. We have to know how much stress the carbon fibers can take and in what shapes they can take them, before we can begin designing the exterior hull of the ship. I told you I was here to relax and have fun with people my own age. Once those numbers come in, I can go back to play with Sequoia." 

"I'll bite, who is Sequoia?" 

"Sequoia is the fastest supercomputer on the market. It's IBM's brainchild, and my dad has two of them in the lab. One of them is named for my five-year-old brother. Gordon is either as smart as or smarter than I am. He will be doing the navigation for us when we leave Earth, and before we go into stasis. He has already started planning our journey. It looks like we are going to the Gliese system; 581G to be precise. It orbits a red giant, but it is believed to be the closest habitable planet to us. We will know more after we pass through Heliopause, and get a better look at it through our telescope without our Sun's magnetic interference. Gordon will make that call. 

"You are going to let a five-year-old boy navigate through interstellar space?" 

"You have never met Gordon. What he knows is scary. He will be 15 when we leave." 

"Can you bring him into class one day?" 

"I will see what I can do. He hates to be a way from Gordon 2." 

"Okay, who or what is Gordon 2?" 

"It was my dad's birthday present for Gordon. He had his name etched on the glass that protects the inside of the new Sequoia. Gordon thought my dad didn't buy him a birthday present because he was angry with him. My dad told him it was in the laboratory. It was covered by a black shroud and when Gordon uncovered it his reaction was unbelievable. When he saw his name etched on the glass, he nearly knocked my father over when he jumped into his arms to thank him. My dad really knows how to get into people's hearts and minds." 

"Should I ask how much that computer cost?" 

"You could go shoe shopping for a very long time." 

"Oh goody; can I go to work for your father?" 

"When Stephano is ready, and he has the applications printed out, I'll give you one. There will be some very tough competition to get in, but you can give it a try." 

"What else can you tell me without breaking confidence?" 

"A 16-year-old genius, Laura Valentino, and her mother Patti, are working on putting us into stasis. There are so many other permutations of what is happening, and at what day and time, we are going to need another Sequoia just to keep track of them." 

"It sounds like you are going to need a lot of help." 

"Yes we are; but that is Stephano Valentino's job. I don't envy him. He has to take care of all the money, hire all the people, fixed the salaries, take care of all the purchasing, hire auditors every six months, and the list goes on endlessly. He lives in Glen Falls New York, but his offices are in Charleston South Carolina. I don't think that man is ever going to be at home for the next 10 years, and I don't think he's going to get very much sleep either." 

"I hope they're paying him a lot of money." 

"No, he's not getting a penny. He is one of the investors." 

"If he has that much money, I don't feel sorry for him at all." 

"I was with my father the day he demonstrated the radios that can transmit sound around mountains to a very select group of investors, plus the military. The Valentino's were one of the investors who were invited. After the test was successful completed, my father told everyone the bidding price was $500 million per unit. He was keeping 30% of the units for himself and our family. No one was allowed to buy more than 20% of the units. All the corporations that were invited were on their phones trying to get permission to buy units. Three people walked up to my father and wrote checks: Mister Valentino, Mister Chase, and Mister Castronova. They wrote checks for $20 billion like it was nothing. My father folded the checks and put them in his pocket. Can you imagine putting $60 billion in your pocket?" 

"I would've gone shoe shopping." 

"Who would have had enough money in the register to make change?" 

"You have never seen me shop for shoes." 

"Do we have homework for Thursday?" 

"Why would I give you homework, you know this stuff as well as I do. I'll try to get you some work from the doctoral program to keep you interested while you're here. Are you interested in anything particular?" 

"If you get me something on Thermodynamics that would be appreciated." 

"You'll have it Thursday. I'd like not to be in jail when I hand it to you." 

"Your name will not be on the list. Thanks Doctor Jerome." 

"My name's Beatrice; if you call me that name, I will cut out your tongue. You can call me Betty when we are not in class." 

"Thank you Betty, my name is Delicious, you can call me Dell any time you want." 

********* 

Technology: Optical Electronics, Lasers, Gaussian Optics, Nonlinear Optics, Nanostructures, Energy Engineering Doctor Burke 

Tuesday was more fun than Monday. She had high hopes she could learn something new here. She was early, and waiting by the desk to hand the professor her paperwork, when this young man walked in. He couldn't be more than 26 years old. 

She said out loud, "Oh shit, not again." 

He replied in a soft voice, "Do You Have a Problem Miss?" 

"Yes I do, I had the same problem yesterday. I'm tired of having teaching assistants teach classes instead of professors. Would you please go to the office and have the damn professor come out here so I can speak to him. Get him off his lazy ass so he can teach this class. You look like a nice young man, but I'd like to learn something, and I'd like to learn it from someone who knows his job." 

"Miss who were you expecting to teach this class?" 

"According to the syllabus, it is Doctor Redmond Burke." 

He reached into his breast pocket and pulled out his University ID. He looked at it, nodded his head, and said, "Yip that's me." 

He handed her the ID, and she turned red. "I think I just made a fool out of myself. I'm sorry Doctor Burke; you looked too young to be a professor. I apologize for insulting you." 

"All pretty girls who insult me have to date me after the semester is over." 

"You have two problems Doctor. The first one is I am 17 years old. The second one is on the third finger of my left hand." 

"Who got to you before I did? Is he as handsome as I am?" 

"Who told you you're handsome?" 

"My grandmother did, and she is never wrong." 

"I think I'm going to like this class, you are very funny. You are not handsome, but you could be considered cute to some undergraduate students. My fiancé is Doctor Grayson Thyme, formerly of NASA and now working with my father, Doctor Even Luck." 

"You're Delicious?" 

"Thank you very much." 

"I didn't mean it that way. You are Delicious Luck?" 

To get even with him, she took out her paperwork, looked at it for a moment, nodded her head, and said, "Yip that's me." 

"You have a sense of humor. I like that in a little girl." 

She was about to bark at him, when she remembered what her dad told her Sunday. She smiled, breathed, backed off, and said nothing. Let him be the jerk she thought. 

"Why did you mention my name as if you knew me?" 

"I don't know you. I heard your name being bandied about in the faculty lunchroom. Your professors are quite taken by you, and your knowledge, especially Doctor Jerome. She mentioned she would like to test you out of the college ranks, award you a Bachelor of Science Degree, and put you in graduate studies. There are many dissenters, but they have not met you yet. You better be prepared for a faculty board meeting. It will not be pleasant, but it is just an act. They will want to test your ability to think on your feet." 

"My fiancé says I have very big feet." 

"I guess he would know." 

"Yes he would, everything but intimately." 

"You are still a..." 

"Are you looking for the 'V' word Doctor? If you are, the answer is yes. We are sleeping together, but we are waiting for our wedding night to consummate our marriage." 

"Doctor Thyme must be made out of mental steel. If I were in bed with you, that piece of flesh would have been gone in an instant." 

"That is the difference between love and lust Doctor Burke. Gray loves me and wants to protect me from people like you. 

You lust after my body, because of what you see. You wouldn't care if you hurt me in the process. You could fuck me for months, and then find someone prettier than I am, and drop me like a hot rock. My feelings wouldn't matter to you, because you didn't love me in the first place. I was only a nice piece of ass to satisfy your needs. Now you are on your way to the next victim because I don't do it for you anymore." 

"That is a very callous attitude." 

"Is it callous Doctor, or is it true? You said anyone that insults you has to go out with you at the end of the semester. Is that the way you get into your student pants? If it is, it's illegal. She may have to take another class with you before she graduates." 

"You are very smart for 17-year-old girl." 

"Why couldn't you say I was very smart, and leave out the rest? Are you that sexist? Do you grade all your female students that way?" 

"I don't know? I'm going to have to go back and take a look at my grading system. I never thought of it that way. I hope I haven't kept anyone back because of it. I would feel terrible about that. Thank You Delicious, please take your seat so I can start this class." 

She took a seat in an area where girls were dominant, and they smiled at her. One of them said, "He grades us harder than the men in his classes. He's been known to do that for years, and no one has said a word about it, until you did. Thanks a lot, I think you helped us all." 

"If I helped, it's been my pleasure. Lunch is on me if you are going to the cafeteria." 

There was a gasp from the group that surrounded her. Some of them said they would see her there. 

At lunch one round table was not enough. They pushed two of them together, and put Delicious where they joined, so everyone could see her. They didn't talk about the class subject. They talked about Doctor Burke, life, and loves. Delicious blushed when she realized she was the only virgin at the table. Her classmates would not get off the subject, and kept asking her WHY? 

Finally, she said, "Why not? She showed them her diamond ring, told them about Gray, and their promise to each other." 

The young women looked and listened to her with rapt attention. There was no way they could go to bed with their boyfriends, and not have sex with them. It was much too pleasurable, and satisfying to think of sleeping naked with them, fooling around to the point of orgasm, and waiting until July to have penetrative sex. They wanted to meet this mystery man, and make sure he was made out of flesh and blood. 

Delicious told them they would have to come to the University very early in the morning to see him. He had to be in Idaho Springs to work with her father around 9 AM. If they could all be here Friday, at 7:45 AM, she would bring him with her. If they did not come, she would beat the shit out of all of them, because he would punish her for lying to him." 

This brought up another line of questioning. "How does he punish you?" 

"Oh no, I'm not going to answer that one. It is too private and very enjoyable for both of us." 

The girls laughed at her comment. 

"Why does that man follow you around like a shadow?" 

"Logan is my shadow. He is my security agent. If anyone threatens me, or looks like he wants to harm me, Logan will protect me with his life, if necessary. It's not because he likes me, it's because of what I know." 

"What do you know that is so secret?" 

"I can't tell you that, because it is too secret." 

"Are you working on the spaceship with your father?" 

"That's not a secret, so the answer is yes. I won't answer any more questions about my participation in that project." 

"Why are you in school with us?" 

"I am here to rest, and mingle with people my own age. I've never been allowed to do that before." 

"Can I ask you what your IQ is?" 

"207." 

"Holy shit, I thought I was good at 156." 

"They told me it would be higher if I learned how to draw. That's why I'm taking mechanical engineering. I want to be smarter than my father." 

"What is his IQ?" 

"207." 

"Isn't that a bitch, you tied him because you couldn't draw. You don't need mechanical engineering; you need to take some art lessons." 

"No, not for what I will be doing. You people are going to get me in trouble, with my fiancée, and my father. They are going to draw and quarter me if they find out what I've been talking about. Please keep this meeting private, or you will find me by the side of the road, cut into little pieces." 

"What about Logan, isn't he supposed to protect you?" 

"Logan will be the one that will slice me into pieces for talking too much. Please don't mention this conversation, I would like to live long enough to get married, and have a baby as my wedding gift to my husband." 

"The way you speak about everything, I would not have taken you for a romantic. When you talk about Gray, you gush. You really have it bad for him, don't you? 

"He is the beginning and the end of my world. I don't know what I would do if I lost him." 

Logan approached her. "I'm sorry to break up this lovely meeting, but you have 30 minutes to destroy your next class." 

"I'm not that bad Logan. I just tell it the way I see it." 

"Yes miss, and if they don't see it your way, the first 15 minutes of your class is an argument between a teaching assistant, and a professor, who doesn't have their shit together." 

"You just said a bad word Logan. You owe the pretzel jar $10." 

"Can I have the $10 you won from Jerry?" 

"No I'm going to frame it." 

"I am going to be in the bathroom when they kidnap you." 

She reached into her pocketbook, and took out the $10. "You don't play fair Logan." 

"In my contract it doesn't say I have to play fair. Say goodbye to your friends, and if they mentioned a word about what you told them, I will tell your father and Grayson what you did. You can't believe how much trouble you are going to be in. They will lock you in the trunk for a week." 

"Traitor." 

"Your father pays me, not you." 

"Ladies, please keep your mouths closed. Do you see what I have to put up with?" 

They all nodded their heads, and promised not to say a word about what they heard. She was too precious an asset to a study group. 

She stood up, said goodbye, as Logan took her by the arm and led her away like a felon. 

"How could you possibly hear what I was saying to the girls? My back was to you, I was speaking just loud enough for them to hear me, and I wasn't using my hands for emphasis. What did I do wrong?" 

"You didn't do anything wrong. I didn't hear a word you said to them. I looked at the way those young women were looking at you. I knew you were giving them information they should not have. You were being a bad girl, and I wanted them to know it, in the harshest possible terms, that they had to keep their mouths shut. I don't think they will betray you, because of what I said, and how I said it." 

"You are a sneaky bastard Logan." 

"I try my best miss." 

*************** 

Mechanical Engineering: 

Aerospace Design and Engineering / Vehicle Designs and Performance/ Electrical Systems 

The classroom was full when she walked in. Only one seat was available, and it was directly in front of the professor's desk. She knew a set up when she saw one. She looked at her new classmates, "Very funny guys; no I will not be a part of any of your study groups." 

An audible groan moved through the room. 

"Are you destroying the decorum of my room already Miss Luck?" 

"No Doctor Allerton, I think my classmates tried to pull a fast one on me. If you check your seating chart some of your students are not where they are supposed to be. I have no problem sitting in the front of the room however." 

"You have a 4:30 meeting in front of the Faculty and Administrative Boards. If you are smart as your other professor's say you are you will be awarded a Bachelor of Science Degree, and moved into graduate studies." 

"I don't know about this. I may not want to do it. My dad wanted me have fun, and relax, while I was here. I will have to call him and get his approval. May I speak to my security agent for a moment?" 

"Certainly, go ahead." 

When Logan saw her coming out of the room early he ran towards her thinking something was wrong. When she touched his sleeve he relaxed. 

"Call my dad Logan, it's important." 

************ 

"What's the problem Delicious?" 

"Dad, they want to put me in front of a faculty board this afternoon. When I pass their exam they want to award me a Bachelor of Science Degree and move me into graduate studies. I don't know if I want to do that dad. It will put me with all older people, and I like being where I am. Everyone is 18 or 19 years old, and they are very friendly with me. If I go into graduate studies, they will be in their mid-20s. I will get lost again. It will defeat the purpose of my being here." 

"If you know what you want to do why are you calling me?" 

"I want you to be the bad guy." 

"Oh, you want to be the innocent one, and make me look like the ogre." 

"You play the ogre very well most of the time." 

"What class are you in now?" 

"Mechanical engineering, Doctor Allerton is the professor." 

"Let me speak to Hank." 

"Doctor Allerton, my dad would like to speak to you." 

"How Are You Even?" 

"Richer than I ever thought I would be. I'd like to talk to you about my daughter. She doesn't need a degree; she needs to assimilate into a group of her peers. She has lived in a box all her life. I need her to breathe freely. She knows this stuff backwards, forwards and upside down. The only thing she can't do is draw. You can't say a word about what I'm about to tell you, and I know I can trust you. She designed our nuclear engine without any help, and it's not water-cooled. The design is 50 years ahead of anything that is currently being designed by anyone in the industry. It blew me away when I first saw it. It was patented about six weeks ago, approved by the Energy Department. It is currently with the NRC for review. Can you imagine a 15-year-old girl starting from scratch and building a nuclear power plant Hank? She did it in 18 months, with pencil, paper, and a library computer." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 12



"If I weren't talking to you Even, I would call you a liar and have no doubts about it. Why is she in my class?" 

"I told you, she can't draw. You have to teach her how to draw schematics." 

"I can do that Even. Can you give me a hint at what she has to do for you?" 

"She has to do every control panel in the craft; every electrical circuit, junction, schematic, and everything else so the craftsman can do their job without having to ask questions every other second." 

"You are not looking at one semester's worth of work. This could take a few years." 

"Take her under your wing; you will be amazed how quickly she can learn. Take a sabbatical; I will pay you your weight in gold, that's how important she is to this undertaking." 

"My Doctor may hate me because of all the weight I've gained, but I'm sure going to love getting on the scale when you pay me." 

"You won't even put a dent in my checkbook." 

"I'll start my sabbatical in January." 

"Thanks Hank, I knew I could count on you." 

He gave the phone to Logan, and looked at Delicious. 

"Young lady, you better get used to looking at this face, because you're going to be seeing it every day starting January. I'm going to be teaching you how to draw." 

"My father's checkbook can be very convincing at times." 

"Yes it can, especially when he told me he was going to pay me my weight in gold." 

"Shall we go for ice cream after class?" 

"A double thick banana split sounds enticing, but now I have a class to teach. We will discuss your schedule with me, after you set up your schedule for next year." 

"I'm going to school next year?" 

"Yes you are; your father wants you to assimilate with people your own age. I am a little older than you are. I will help you choose your classes and your instructors. You will also come with me to that meeting at 4:30. It's only proper you show up." 

"That banana split may melt." 

"I'll have them put it in a blender, and make a milkshake out of it." 

"That sounds like a plan. Let's go to class, I want to learn how to draw." 

************ 

As they entered the room Doctor Allerton said, "Knock their socks off with your knowledge, and then turn them down when they offer you a degree. It will squeeze the air out of the room." 

"You've been that talking to my dad too long." 

"He didn't tell you we went to MIT together? He was a year ahead of me." 

"He failed to mention that to me." 

Doctor Allerton said, "Members of the board this is Delicious Luck." 

"Miss Luck, please take the seat that's been reserved for you. I am Doctor Holland, the vice president of this university, and we are here this afternoon on the unprecedented request of several of your professors. You have a GED diploma from the State of Maine, and your school transcript shows you have less than a 2.1 grade point average. Would you care to explain that to us?" 

"School was boring. I knew more than all the teachers wrapped together. They wouldn't give me advanced work, so I left most of my classes and sat in the vice principals office and in detention most of the time." 

"How did you learn all the advanced knowledge you have come by?" 

"My mother sent out for books from libraries all over the country. What they didn't have she got from universities. I taught myself everything I know." 

"We will see about that this afternoon." 

"Doctor Roswell will ask you a few questions about nuclear physics." 

His question went straight to the inner workings of the nuclear reactor. 

"Doctor Roswell everything you know about the inner workings of the nuclear reactor is about to change. A patent has been filed, submitted to the Department of Energy and is currently with the NRC for approval. The design of all nuclear power plants are obsolete. Nothing will ever be cooled by water again. I cannot discuss this any further, unless you are all willing to sign an NDA." 

"Who designed the reactor?" 

"I cannot discuss that with you unless you sign the NDA." 

"If I sign the NDA can I see the design of the reactor?" 

"Yes you may." 

"Get me a copy of the nondisclosure agreement and I will sign it. Doctor Holland I'm finished with this student and I accept her answer." 

"Doctor Jerome." 

"Professor Holland, Miss Luck is in my class. Without the use of a computer she was able to change airfoil of a winglet from its up position to down and increase the lift, decrease the drag, reduce the wake turbulence effect and increase the fuel efficiency of an aircraft. I watched her do it in less than five minutes. She knows more than I do about aerospace design and engineering. I accept her answers. 

Questions were thrown at her for the next 45 minutes and she only stumbled once on Electronic Gaussian Optics. 

At the end Doctor Holland asked, "Are there any dissenting votes in offering Miss Luck a Bachelor of Science Degree?" 

Delicious raised her hand. 

"Miss Luck, do you have something to say?" 

"Yes sir, my father, Doctor Even Luck does not want me to have a degree. He wants me to stay in undergraduate studies so I can have some fun and stay with students my own age. I have not been able to do that in my life, and while we are waiting for the statistics to come in to build our spacecraft he wants me to enjoy myself and grow. Once we get those statistics, we will be working nonstop to design and build that craft until we are ready to leave the Earth behind." 

"Do you believe this is going to work Miss Luck?" 

"Did you think it was possible for radio waves to be transmitted around mountains Doctor Holland? The engines for our spacecraft are already built. They are ready to be installed in the craft, all but one that is, and we are waiting for approval on that one." 

Doctor Roswell exclaimed, "Oh my God, you have patented a working design for the nuclear engine, didn't you?" 

Delicious did not reply. 

"Give her the damn degree, Doctor Holland, and let her stay in undergraduate studies. I have a feeling this young woman knows more about nuclear science than all of us sitting at this table." 

"Doctor Roswell has put in motion before this board; do I hear a second?" 

"I second the motion," Doctor Jerome said. 

"All those in favor of the motion signified by saying Aye." 

The entire panel voted "Aye." Delicious was awarded a Bachelor's of Science Degree after attending four days of college. 

She stood up and thanked the board. "I hope this does not get me in trouble with my father. Sometimes he gets very angry with me, when I do not do what he tells me to do." 

Doctor Allerton said to her, "I'll tell him you fought them tooth and nail not to take this degree, but they forced it upon you. He will believe me." 

"No he won't, he can tell a lie from a mile away." 

"Then I'll call him from here. It's more than 90 miles away from your home." 

"You can give it a try, but it's not going to work." 

"Call my dad again, Logan. He may be angry this time." 

************ 

"You lying sack of shit, you could have walked her out of the room, instead of letting her answer those questions. You just wanted to show her off in front of those professors. I should neuter you." 

"You're too late Even, I've already been neutered." 

"Why, you're not even married." 

"Do you realize how much young stuff walks in and out of my classroom every day? I would break the bank buying condoms every week. This was cheaper, and my insurance company paid for it." 

"Always thinking ahead aren't you Hank." 

"At least I was thinking with the big head instead of the little one." 

"Why don't you come out and visit us one day. I think we will blow your mind." 

"You better have two NDA's ready. Doctor Roswell is chomping at the bit to see your nuclear engine." 

"How does he know about it?" 

"His question was about nuclear reactors and Delicious told him everything he knew about reactors was wrong. When she told him that the reactors of the future would not be water-cooled he went through the roof. Delicious told him she wouldn't say anything more unless he signed the NDA. I think he would have given his heart and both lungs to see those designs right then and there. I'll bring him with me and we can see them together. Is this Saturday okay with you?" 

"Saturday is fine. Why don't you come here about 2:00 and plan on staying for dinner." 

"That's mighty generous of you Even. We will see you at 2:00." 

********** 

"Let's see if Roswell is still in the room, we are invited to dinner Saturday." 

"He caught you in the lie, didn't he?" 

"Yes, that bastard must have ESP." 

"He catches me all the time, and I catch him." 

"Does anyone in your house tell the truth?" 

"We tell the truth all the time now. We got tired of getting into arguments by lying." 

"Roswell, we're invited to Even Luck's house Saturday. I'll pick you up at 12:15." 

"We are not going in your car. I doubt that thing could make it 200 miles. What do you do with all your money?" 

"I save it for retirement." 

"With that car, you may not make it to retirement. We will take my car, and I will pick you up." 

"I knew I could get him to pay for the gasoline." 

"Doctor Allerton that was a nasty thing to do." 

"Nasty, but effective." 

"Ice Cream, I'll even buy." 

"You're his daughter, and he pays you?" 

"Yes, he gives me a little bit to live on." 

"How little is a little bit?" 

"He pays me $500,000 a year." 

"You're damn right you are paying for the ice cream." 

51. Meeting His Parents 

Once Logan checked the apartment thoroughly he said good night and took off for the rest of the day. Delicious secured the apartment, started dinner, and went to take a long shower. She had a long and wonderful day, and she was daydreaming as the hot water sprayed over her head. Suddenly, the water turned ice cold, and she screamed, "I'm going to kill you Gray." 

"How do you always know it's me? Why can't it be a plumbing malfunction, or an act of God?" 

"As long as I let you live, I know it's your fault. After I kill you, one of those two things will become possibilities. Kiss me before I get angry with you." 

"Is the water warm?" 

"Do you think I would be standing in cold water talking to you civilly?" 

He stepped into the shower, and he was hit by the freezing water. She was standing underneath the showerhead laughing at him 

"You lied to me. You know what that means." 

"Yes it means you're still being hit by cold water dummy." 

He reached for her, but she slid down the wall to a sitting position. He was freezing, so he adjusted the water temperature, instead of going after his primary target. 

"Was that funny little girl?" 

"Did you have fun turning off the hot water for me big boy?" 

"Yes I did, I enjoyed that very much, especially the scream." 

"What are you doing home so early today?" 

"I decided to come home and play house." 

"We play house all the time, especially now that we have our own apartment. Should we change the locks? If the building manager knows the codes, he could walk in here anytime." 

"If you would like to do that, we can have it done tomorrow." 

"Yes, I would like to do that; I would feel safer when I'm alone." 

"It's going to take some time for you to get Maine out of your system, but believe me you will get past it. Do you see how nice the people at school are to you? That's how normal people act. They are not the assholes you dealt with in Waterville. They were aberrations, and you survived. These are really nice people and they like you just for being you." 

"Can I get up now, my ass hurts?" 

"It will hurt worse when I smack it." 

"I did nothing to earn a spanking, so keep your hands off of it" 

"I came home hoping I could kiss it all over." 

"Kissing is allowed, spanking is not." 

"I will try to restrain myself." 

"Remember I am cooking dinner, and you don't know where the poisons are." 

"You wouldn't do that to me, my parents are coming down in three weeks. They would notice I am missing." 

"When were you going to inform me that I meeting your parents?" 

"I haven't told them I am engaged yet." 

"What the hell are you waiting for?" 

"You have not met my mother, I have. She's still angry with me for leaving NASA. My ears are still ringing from that conversation." 

"Should I move out of the apartment when they get here? Should I move out of here permanently and give you your ring back?" 

"Don't go there baby. I have three weeks to work on her and if everything else fails; we can elope." 

"Would you care to bet on that?" 

"Why, who would stop us?" 

"The man you currently work with has plans for a wedding that include a big church in the center of Denver. If you try to elope with me, the authorities will never find any of your atoms." 

"So it's a choice between a conversation with your father, who will put me into an atom smasher, and my mother who will ring my neck for not marrying Miss Junie Penick." 

"Who is Junie Penick?" 

"You are not a railroad family so you wouldn't know who her father is. Mister Cyrus Penick owns 38% of the B&O Railroad. My father owns 32% of the B&O Railroad. Do you know what that means?" 

"I see little children, under a Christmas tree, playing with B&O railroad cars." 

"So does my mother. It doesn't matter to her that Junie slept through the entire University of Pennsylvania's Kappa Sigma Phi fraternity to get her degree. It does matter to me. Junie wants an open marriage; I don't. Junie doesn't particularly care whose child she carries; I do. In other words she is a slut. She looks like a queen, and acts like it, when she is in the presence of high society. She knows all the appropriate jokes, and knows exactly when to laugh. She is the perfect host and the perfect guest. My mother thinks she's perfect for me; she isn't. You are." 

"I was hoping I fit in there somewhere. What is she going to say about your leaving the planet?" 

"You are going to see the largest fireworks display since New York's 1976 fireworks extravaganza for the 200th anniversary of the birth of this Nation? She is going to shit a brick, and then she is going to blow her top. There will be a mushroom cloud over the city of Denver." 

"It's going to be that bad?" 

"No, it's going to be worse than bad; it's going to be horrendous." 

"You keep talking about your mother, how about your father?" 

"My father tends to business matters, and he is brilliant at it. When it comes to family matters he rarely gets involved. When he does he says a maximum of three words, and whatever is going on, ceases immediately. If it's my mother he says, "Freda shut up." That's it; the discussion is at an end. My mother becomes as quiet as a church mouse. If my father has anything else to say he will say it. Otherwise, he will go back to reading the stock market report." 

"I think I like your father better than I like your mother." 

"I have no idea how they got together. I know it was not an arranged marriage, but they are definitely not a matched set." 

Delicious sniffed the air. "Crap, dinner is burning, get out of my way." She jumped out of the shower and bent down to get a towel. 

He smacked her ass. 

She screamed at him on her way to the kitchen, "Dinner may be burnt, but maybe you shouldn't eat it anyhow. I told you not to hit me, and you will never know what I'm putting on it now. Socrates would have lived longer if he kept to himself." 

"Socrates died because he had a big mouth." 

"Doctor Grayson Thyme died because he couldn't control his hands." 

"Can I help it if my consort has such a pretty ass, and she's running around our apartment naked?" 

"The only reason I'm naked is you came home earlier than expected. I will get even with you, and you will not like the way I do it." 

"That sounds ominous." 

"I'm glad you feel that way, because it is." 

******** 

"Burnt dinner is on the table, I hope you don't enjoy it." 

He sat down, looked at his plate, and saw some odd things on it. 

"Why do I have these tiny green flakes on my dinner and you don't have them on yours?" 

"It's for taste. I know you like your dinner spicy. I cut up fresh hemlock leaves and added it to your roast beef. You should try the gravy also. I added a little lye to thicken it. I understand it's good for the vocal cords and digestion. How stupid of me, I forgot your wine. I'll be right back." 

She walked passed the refrigerator and turned left. 

"Delicious the wine is in the refrigerator." 

She walked back in to the kitchen seconds later. "I know the wine is in the refrigerator, dear, but what is a good wine if it doesn't have a little liquid Drano in it." 

Gray pounded the table. "Enough, you're dead." 

Delicious screamed, threw the bottle of Drano into the sink, and ran for her life. 

Gray tried to cut her off by running through the living room, but he slipped on the tile floor. When he got up his knee was bleeding, and when he tried to walk he limped. However he was not in enough pain to deter him from his number one goal: punishing his beautiful nemesis. How he loved punishing her; it was his favorite form of entertainment. 

He walked in to their bedroom and did not see her. However, the door to her walk-in closet was slightly open. 

"How dumb can you be Delicious? You left the door to your closet open. I know where you are hiding; prepare for another spanking." 

She didn't answer him, and he didn't trust her as far as he could throw her, unless, of course, it was out the window of their apartment. The closet was dark, and he fumbled for the light switch. He found it and turned the light on. He still could not see her. 'She must be hiding amongst her clothes,' he thought. He walked in, bent down, and looked for her feet. 

Suddenly, he was bombarded by shoes coming from his walk-in closet. The little sneak had tricked him. 

She threw her running shoes, her sneakers, her high heel shoes, her flats, even her slippers at him. When she ran out of her shoes, she started throwing his shoes at him, even his cowboy boots. Her aim was excellent. 

He couldn't attack her, because there was never a letup between shoes coming at his face and chest. 

Then she yelled at him, "This one is for the smack on my ass I didn't deserve." 

Gray covered his head and chest like a boxer; but she was not aiming there this time. She aimed 3 feet lower, and hit him dead center. 

He groaned, fell to his knees, and then flat on his face. 

Delicious said, "Aw, Gray, how terrible; did I hit you in a bad place?" 

He groaned, "Don't you touch me; don't you ever touch me again. We may never be able to have children thanks to you. I think you crushed them." 

"You big baby, if you knew anything about physics or anatomy, you would know I couldn't crush them, because there was nothing behind them to keep them in place. Turn over you big baby, and I'll massage them for you." 

"If you touch them I'll die." 

"If you hit me again, when I don't deserve it, I will help you die. Now turn over, and that is not a request." 

As he turned she saw the blood on the floor. 

"Gray you are bleeding; I'm going to call 911. They may have to operate on them. I may have cut off the blood supply. I'll be right back." 

"I scraped my knee that's where the blood's coming from." 

"Okay, I'll go into the kitchen, get some ice, put it on your balls, and freeze the pain away." 

"Are you out of your mind, you will freeze my balls off." 

"That's a wonderful idea; why didn't I think of it." 

"Okay Delicious, I won't hit you anymore, unless you deserve it." 

"Do you see how easy that was? No more lying, and no more hitting. We may be able to get married after all." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 12



He grabbed her by her ponytail, and pulled her face towards his. 

"What do you mean we may be able to get married after all? I've been sleeping next to a nude woman for two months, and I have not made love to her because of a promise we made to each other. If you try to walk out on me, I will take you to a deserted island and screw you six ways from Tuesday for five years just to make up for the insanity I'm putting up with now." 

"I'm glad you mentioned that. My girlfriends don't believe a man like you exist. They don't believe a man can sleep with a woman and not make love to her. I am the only female at that table who is a virgin. They look at me like I am an oddity. You're coming to school with me tomorrow morning at 7:45. After you speak with them, Jayden can take you to work." 

"What am I, 'Show and Tell'?" 

"You're not allowed to show them anything. I don't want you to frighten them, and have them run away. You can tell them whatever you want, just don't lie." 

"Can we eat dinner now?" 

"Dinner was burnt to a crisp. It was inedible. Let's call in for a pizza or subs." 

"Is that why you went through all this subterfuge?" 

"It did serve a dual purpose. You should have seen the look in your eyes when I brought the Drano into the kitchen. I wish I had a camera for moments like that." 

"You have a hell of a right arm too. Have you ever thought about going out for a baseball team?" 

"No, I've never thought about it." 

"If the college has an intramural team, join up and see what happens. You might enjoy it." 

"Could you teach me how to play baseball?" 

"I was the worst right fielder in the league, but I could hit very well." 

"What could you hit?" 

"The baseball; the pitcher pitches the baseball; the batter tries to hit it." 

"Oh, it's another physics problem. I'll work on it and you can teach me. Do we have to buy anything?" 

"Have you ever seen a baseball game?" 

"No. Julius used to play football, but any time he wanted to watch a sporting event he went to the bar. I would study with my mom. Did my dad tell you what happened today in school?" 

"No, we were working on separate projects. Whose class did you destroy today?" 

"Do you want to try and stand up before I tell you?" 

"Am I going to be back down here after you tell me?" 

"There is that possibility." 

"Then I might as well stay here, and not hurt myself again. What happened at school today?" 

"I went before an Administrative and Faculty Review Board." 

"They're kicking you out already?" 

"No. I received a Bachelor of Science Degree today, after an hour of being tested by all the senior faculty members. They let me C.L.E.P. all my college courses. The vote was unanimous. I bet it took you longer than four days to graduate from college." 

"I don't like you anymore. It took me two full years to graduate from college. It took me four full semesters, two winters and two summers to graduate college; and it took you four days. What did you do to them; threaten to burn down the University?" 

"I didn't want to do it. Three of my professors got together and arranged it. I called dad, because I didn't want to go into graduate studies. It would have put me in with older students, which would have defeated the purpose of my being there. So they are leaving me with all the underclassmen, but letting me study from the graduate level books. I'm going to take an independent study with Doctor Allerton in Mechanical Engineering. He's going to teach me how to draw. My dad told him he would pay him his weight in gold. I took him out for ice cream when the school day ended today." 

Gray laughed. "I would weigh 600 pounds by the time I finished teaching you." 

"You probably wouldn't live long enough to spend the money you earned. Are you well enough to get up now?" 

"Don't you ever hit me there again." 

"I want children, and I want them from you. Does that answer your question?" 

"I will control my hands, even though you have the prettiest butt around." 

"My butt is not a round one, it's heart-shaped." 

"May I take you to bed and check it out?" 

"Not until after we order dinner; I'm hungry." 

"I have an answer for that, but you might hurt me if I said it." 

"Yes I would hurt you, and it would never happen again." 

"Dinner; do you want a pizza or subs, make up your mind." 

"I would like a Hawaiian pizza please?" 

"With or without anchovies?" 

"What the hell, with anchovies." 

"There is a man after my own heart; pineapples and fish." 

She made the call from their bedside phone, and told Gray the man said it would take 45 minutes for it to be delivered. 

"I wonder what we could do in the next 45 minutes." 

"I could take up knitting, and you could take after your father and read the stock market reports." 

"We could do both those things, if you weren't naked. Since you are, I have another idea." 

"Only one idea?" 

"Fuck you." 

"Not until I am 18, and we are married." 

"Bitch!" 

"That will be $20 please. 

"I thought we started at $10." 

"You said two bad words in two sentences." 

"I know how to fix that." 

He grabbed her knees and pulled them apart. 

Delicious screamed, "No!" 

She could have screamed 'supercalifragilisticexpialidocious' and it would not have mattered to him. His tongue was already at work, and her hands were fisting his hair. 

************ 

Two weeks later Gray still had not told his mother he was engaged, and he was acting so irrationally in the lab. I told him to take a week off. I had no idea what his problem was, so I called Logan, had him pull Delicious out of class, and bring her to me. 

"What's going on dad; is everything okay?" 

"That was what I wanted to know. Are you and Gray okay?" 

"We are fabulous dad. Having our own apartment has made our lives super. We fight less, and we talk more. We run every evening, and he even likes my cooking; I think. The privacy helps me a lot, and I'm able to tell him about the things that happened between my mother and father. Are you having a problem with Gray here?" 

"Yes, I am. I told him to take the week off, because he's been acting very strangely. He's not getting any work done, which is very unlike him. Do you have any idea what's going on inside his head?" 

"Oh God, his parents are coming down this weekend. His mother is a real harpe. She wants him to marry a girl whose father owns 38% of the B&O railroad. Gray's father owns 32% of that railroad. Between the two of them they could do whatever they wanted with it. 

Grays mother has visions of grandchildren sitting under the Christmas tree playing with B&O railroad cars. When she hears he's engaged to me she's going to throw a fit. She's already thrown a fit, because he left NASA. When he tells her he's leaving the country she will kill him." 

I laughed. "I can't wait until he tells her exactly how far he's leaving it behind." 

"This is not funny dad, he's afraid of her." 

"How much time do I have?" 

"They arrive Friday afternoon." 

"Do you trust me?" 

"I have always trusted you, even when I hated you." 

"Go home and tell Gray by Friday everything will be fine. Tell him to relax and trust me as you do." 

"You have that evil look on your face dad. What are you thinking of doing?" 

"I have to get these damn batteries in my hearing aid checked. I can't hear a word you're saying. Take my daughter home, Logan. I can't hear a word she's saying to me, again." 

"You are a terrible liar dad." 

"I'm sorry dear what did you say?" 

"I love you dad." 

"I love you too baby." 

"You heard that all right." 

"I read your lips?" 

"I give up. Goodbye dad." 

"Goodbye baby." 

********** 

Jennifer corralled me as soon as our daughter left, and asked me what the problem was. I told her. 

She exclaimed, "Sometimes mothers can be a pain in the ass." 

I asked her if she would put that in writing for me. I might be able to use it at some time in the future." (I was smart enough to be out of arms reach this time, and continue moving away from her at a fast pace. She is with child, and was still closing in on me; as I started down the steps to the lab.) 

In the lab, I picked up my cell phone, and called New York. 

"Zabo residence." 

"Hello Jemma, we haven't met yet, but I am Doctor Even Luck, how are you?" 

"Hello Doctor Luck, my husband has spoken of you many times. Would you like with speak to him?" 

"Yes please, it is a matter of some urgency." 

"Hello Even; is there a problem with our venture?" 

"No not at all, everything is proceeding very well. This is a personal matter and I need your expertise to see if I'm doing the right thing." 

"How can I help you Even?" 

"As you know, my daughter is engaged to Doctor Thyme. His father owns 32% of the B&O railroad. His mother is insistent that he marry some woman whose father owns 38% of that railroad. I don't know what their intentions are, but my daughter will be heartbroken if his mother gets her way, and Gray insists he doesn't want any part of this woman. Can you give me any information about that railroad? Should I buy 18.1% of it to keep his father happy and give him a controlling interest of it? I know nothing about that industry. Can you help me?" 

"Even that railroad company is a gem. I own 7% of it myself. I don't know what the float is, but I have friends that may be willing to sell their shares to me, and I could sell them to you. What is your deadline?" 

"Gray's parents arrive Friday." 

"That's not a lot of time. Let me get to work on it for you, and I'll call you back Wednesday evening to let you know how I'm doing." 

"Thank you William, anything you can do for me will be appreciated 100 times over." 

"You don't have to thank me Even, just keep those patents rolling in." 

"You can count on it my friend; there is no doubt about it." 

On Tuesday morning, there was a special report, on all the television networks, of a major railroad accident involving a freight train traveling at a high rate of speed through the B&O East Coast assembly yard. The double-decked freight carrier was bound for the Baltimore docks, when it crashed into another heavily loaded freight train. The truck-beds and railroad cars were strewn all over the assembly yard and turnarounds, causing massive damage, and fires. The police, fire department, FBI, and Homeland Security were there inspecting the scene Nothing could be touched, until the federal agencies decided if it was an accident or if it was an act of terrorism. That process could take days or weeks. When that was completed, it would take another 7 to 10 days to clear the yard, repair the tracks, and get the trains rolling again. 

For all intent and purposes, the B&O railway and several other railroads that used the yard to assemble their freight carriers were shut down. The B&O railroad was out of business for minimum of 17 to 20 days. 

When the Stock Exchanges opened, B&O's stock price plummeted, and selling was rampant. 

William called Even Wednesday evening with good news. 

"You could not have timed it better, Even. If you bought the stock on Monday, you would have paid a 40% premium and lost a ton of money Tuesday. The accident Tuesday morning sent prices through the floor. I was able to purchase 22% of their stock, directly through the world's stock markets, for $268 million. If you only want the 18.1 I'll keep the rest for myself at that price. What would you like to do?" 

"I will take the 22% William, and give it to my children as a temporary wedding present. Then I will gift it to you for all you have done for us. You are a true and valued friend. I would never have been able to do this without your expertise." 

"That is a very generous offer Even, but I cannot accept it. I have more money than I can spend in 10 lifetimes. Let your children keep it and disperse it as they see fit before we leave this planet. It will drive his mother crazy." 

"You must be the smartest man alive William. I know it will give Gray the greatest pleasure to drive his mother insane. If you saw the way he acted this past week you would understand. Thank you so much for being my friend. If there is ever anything I can do for you, ask, and I will get it done." 

"I feel the same way about you Even. Keep up the good work, I will keep in touch. Goodbye now." 

I called Rod and had him write out a check to William for the amount of the transaction. He reminded me of the times I would choke at the thought of writing a check for $26.80. I remembered those days only too well. 

I called Delicious and asked her not to scream when I told her what I did. 

She screamed anyhow. 

I asked her if I could speak to Gray, but she kept thanking me for minutes on end. I finally said to her, "If they don't get the check within 48 hours, the sale is void. Now am I going to speak to Gray or am I not sending them the check?" 

She dropped the phone, screamed and ran through their apartment to get Gray. 

"Pick up the phone Gray, it's is my father." 

"I'm sorry about this week Even. This showdown with my mother is going to be a bitch." 

"What showdown with your mother? Didn't Delicious tell you that I own 22% of the B&O railroad? It's Jennifer and my wedding present to both of you." 

"What did you just say?" 

"Why is everyone having a hard time understanding what I'm saying lately? I'm going to have everyone's ears checked. I own 22% of the B&O Railroad. It's Jennifer and my wedding present to you and my daughter. If your mother opens her mouth tell her to shut the fuck up. Your family can control the railroad, if you want to. Your father will put his foot down on your mother's throat if he has to, but your mother will never say another word to you as long as she lives." 

"Why did you do this Even? Was it for Delicious?" 

"Of course it was for Delicious, but it was just as much for you. I watch how you work, and I like what I see. You are a brilliant scientist and over the next nine years you are going to become an invaluable asset to this quest of ours. I would not trade you for any 10 other scientists. I'm not just saying that to keep you happy Gray, it's the truth. You grasp concepts quickly, where others would stare for hours and get nothing done. I want you to be at my side, until the end of this project. I want you to be with me, and watch us succeed. I want you to be able to laugh at all the doubters, who were positive we were going to fail." 

"I want a raise." 

"No. I just spent $268 million to put your head on straight, and put cement in your mother's mouth. I will not let you prey on my sympathy for your feelings, plus you dented your new car in less than two hours." 

"That was not my fault." 

"You were driving the car, which makes you liable for the accident. If Gordon could see over the steering wheel, he could probably have driven it better than you." 

"That was a low blow Even." 

"Go out and celebrate with my daughter. Your worries are over. Be at work early tomorrow to make up for your lost time." 

"You want me to celebrate tonight and be at work early tomorrow. I don't know how that is going to work out." 

"Don't drink alcoholic beverages." 

"Yes daddy." 

"You're welcome son." 

************ 

Months after the incident the National Transportation Safety Board blamed the accident on a faulty linkage coupling between the power control module and the locomotives speed control assembly. It was put down as a control malfunction. The engineer was absolved of any criminal involvement in the accident. 

Thankfully no one was hurt. 

******** 

Gray and Delicious waited by the exit area for United Airlines passengers. Delicious had to talk him into meeting them here, because it was the right thing to do. He was not so sure about it. 

When he spotted his parents he waved, and pointed them out to her. Delicious was expecting a good-looking woman, a very polished aristocratic looking person, who demanded attention. This woman was anything but that. She stood about 5'1" tall, severely overweight, and had a face that could stop an Abrams tank. She nearly laughed. 

His father was exactly what she expected. Gray and he could be twins separated by 25 years or so. He was tall, walked with a grace that demanded you to get out of his way, because he was someone, and you were not in his league. It was the same walk she had seen from William Zabo and Stephano Valentino. It was a bearing you could not miss, unless you were blind. 

The argument started within seconds. 

"Hello mother, how are you?" 

"I'm fine, who the hell is she?" 

"Keep a civil tongue in your mouth mother or you can get on the next aircraft and go home." 

"Don't you dare talk to me like that; I raised you to be a gentleman." 

"You raised me to be afraid of you. I am no longer afraid. If you are going to continue to mouth off, turn around, and leave, it won't bother me at all. This is my fiancée, Delicious Luck." 

"You can tell this little tramp to get lost. You are going to marry Junie Penick." 

"I would not marry that slut if she was the last woman on the face of the earth. Except for father, I believe she has fucked every man in the state of Pennsylvania. She is probably halfway through the women by now. I have no doubt that her father was first on her list." 

"Don't you dare talk about Cyrus that way." 

"Do you want to continue this discussion in the airport terminal, or in the comfort of my home." 

Randolph Thyme said, "Your home please Grayson." 

Logan took point, and Jayden picked up the rear. 

Gray's mother asked, "Who are they?" 

"They are our bodyguards. What we are working on is so advanced, my friends at NASA asked me if they should cut off funding for Orion, and wait until we give our patents to the University in 9 or 10 years, to go to Mars." 

40 minutes later they entered their penthouse apartment, and his mother started picking it apart. 

Gray saw that Delicious was at her boiling point, and stepped in. 

"Dad either you tell mother to shut up or I will. Delicious and I own 22% of the B&O railway. If we want, we can combine our stock with yours and have over 50% control of the company, and do whatever you want with it. If you don't put a muzzle on your wife I will go to Cyrus Penick, and I will combine my stock with his and let him decide the future of the railroad. Think of yourself looking down on Cyrus, or him looking down at you. How do you want to play this?" 

"When and how much did you pay for the stock?" 

"It was purchased Wednesday for $268 million." 

"I know you didn't have that kind of money. Who bought it for you?" 

"My soon to be father, Doctor Even Luck." 

"Your father is a sneaky bastard. He purchased all the stock that was available, starting in Japan, as soon as their market opened. He had buy orders in every market as their exchanges opened. By the time the New York Stock Exchange opened there wasn't one share to be had. I was furious, because I was ready to buy a controlling interest in the company." 

"You have that opportunity now dad and you don't have to spend a dime to do it." 

"I've already told Cyrus that Gray was going to marry Junie. I will not go back on my word." 

"Freda shut up. When are you two getting married?" 

"Next July, we haven't picked the date yet." 

"Don't you think you should? July is a very busy month for weddings, and vacations. You don't want to mess up people's vacation plans by scheduling your wedding in the middle of them." 

"Delicious would you bring in your Microsoft Surface Pro so we can look for a date after your birthday." 

He didn't see her leave the room, but she was handing him her computer before he knew it. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 13



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

***** 

Chapter 13 

53. Messages 

After receiving the text from Shelby, I was not certain my communication systems were secure, and that was something I needed to know now. The easiest way to find out was the oldest way in the book; find a public telephone. That is easier said than done in this day and age. 

Rod told me I could find one in our public utilities building. It was a cost savings method they used for contractors whose cell phones did not work in our mountainous regions. 

I called Shelby, and asked the three questions which were on my mind: "1. Are my communications secure? 2. Is it safe for Delicious and Gray to get married July 25th? 3. Is it safe for them to go on their honeymoon to Europe?" 

He was very emphatic with his answers. 

"Even, we did the upgrade on your phone lines, while you were in Austin. They are secure. If you get a high pitch tone on your phone lines, or hash marks at the beginning of your computer upload, someone has tempered with those lines. Shut everything down and call me. 

Delicious and Gray can get married as scheduled. These people wouldn't be brash enough to kill that many scientists and wealthy people, and expect to get away with it. They are watched and listened to 24 hours a day, seven days a week. If we get a whisper out of them, you will know about it. 

Europe is out of the question. It would be a perfect place for them to kidnap them and get away with it. Make no changes to their plans publicly; don't even tell them about it. Send them to Australia and New Zealand. It may not be as historical, but it is much safer for them." 

I said, "I'm going to call my investors to see if they want to back out. This is getting much too dangerous. I don't want to see any of them lose their lives, or their money." 

"You were always a good man Even. Dad is on his way to Greece with mom. I am in charge now. If you need me, I'm always here for you." 

"Thanks Shelby, it's good to have friends in high places." 

******** 

I set up a conference call with my investors to tell them the problems we were now facing. I made it for 6 PM Milan Italy time, to make it convenient for Celeste and Philip Castronova. It would be noon on the East Coast and 10 AM here in Denver. Everyone congratulated me on the birth of my son, and then I immediately got down to business. 

"Ladies, gentlemen, I have called you today on a manner of the utmost urgency. There is a high-powered corporation, here in the United States that wants us to fail at any cost. They were the ones responsible for the attack on the armored cars. They had help from either the NSA or the CIA. My source is impeccable. It is his belief that this corporation will do anything to disrupt, and dismantle our project. 

I want to give you this opportunity to protect yourselves and your investments from being wasted on a project that could be blown up at the last moment. 

Apparently, these people have a vested interest in the new super-rocket being built to send Orion to Mars. If we can do in one hour, what will take 46 days for them to do; they are going to be out of business. I am in this project until the end. I will understand, quite frankly, I would advise you, for your own safety, to drop out now." 

William Zabo was the first to answer. "What are you going to do with all my patents if I drop out?" 

"May I quote you my friend? You have enough money for 10 lifetimes. These patents would bring you up to 100 lifetimes. You would have to talk Jemma into many more children." 

"I'm trying Even, she's not cooperating." 

Everyone on the call laughed. 

"Did Shelby give you a name?" 

"I won't even ask how you knew it was Shelby, but no he didn't. He just said the company was very high up the food chain." 

"I will speak to him, and get that information from him. I am in with you Even. I want to watch as you lift off the ground and take that spaceship of ours to the stars." 

"Thank you William, please be careful, I would be devastated if anything happened to you or any member of your family." 

"Thank you my friend, I will take extra precautions." 

"Philip, you lost your entire family to an act of terrorism. I believe you and Celeste should withdraw to keep your family safe, and have your family name continue for the future." 

"Even should I tell you where my balls are now, or do you want to guess?" 

"How hard is she squeezing?" 

"Tears are about to flow out of my eyes. My darling wife and I wish to stay with you and our project until your vessel is transmitting pictures back from beyond the moon." 

"Celeste let the man go, he has suffered enough." 

"Who me; I was just playing with my husband." 

"Yes Celeste, like a pride of lions play with a water buffalo." 

"Be nice to me Even; you know what happens when I get angry." 

"Yes, you will squeeze Phillips balls until he screams." 

"You and your son are the last of your line Stephano. Is Patti anywhere near her gun? " 

"Yes she is, but Laura, Robert, and Anna have her arms pinned to her sides. She can't move." 

Patti yelled, "They do not. It's tough enough getting my head around this problem, without you causing more trouble." 

"Are you having a problem with stasis Patti?" 

"Are we having a problem with stasis Laura?" 

"I wouldn't call it a real problem Doctor Luck. I would say after four weeks of trying, we are at -20." 

"Is that all; -20? When I was working on bending radio waves, I was in the minus thousands, until I made a mistake and put in the wrong heat coefficient. That was the day everything changed and it worked. Keep trying, it will happen." 

"Thank you Doctor Luck, I was not going to give up until my mother and I started fighting." 

"When you start to fight, don't forget to listen to the other person's argument. There could be a kernel of truth in there that you need." 

"Mister and Mrs. Chase, how do you feel about this project?" 

"Even with the amount of money that comes into my account every month, I will never be poor. Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead." 

"Mr. Schneider, how do you feel about this? You are involved in this project in more than one way." 

"Doctor Luck, I have had a security team around me since I was 18 years old. No member of my family goes out without them for any reason. We are with you on this project." 

"How do you feel about this President Atwater?" 

"Doctor Luck, not only am I in, but I will use every resource I have to find out who the perpetrators are and bring them to justice." 

William Zabo said, "Mister President if I was a betting man, and I am, I would bet you $1 million that is MicManus industries in New Orleans. Our organization is a direct threat to the life-blood of that corporation's existence. Without this contract they are dead in the water. Although Boeing is the prime contractor, they are doing the actual building of the rocket. If anything goes wrong, they will be blamed." 

"That company played both sides of the political fence in the last election. They funded both parties equally. They were very cute about it too. They attended all the appropriate dinners, and shook all the right hands. I'll be damned if I can remember any of the corporate faces." 

"Mister President can you find out who, and what agency helped them fire the rockets at my trucks?" 

"The other Party controls everything right now: the Congress and the presidency. So that's going to be very hard to do. I still have friends in high places, especially in the FBI, which is still working the case. I will put my best effort forward, you can count on that." 

"Thank you Mister President, that's the best any of us can ask for." 

"William, Celeste, it's time to get the property we need on Federal Land. I have an idea that might keep our friends guessing for a long time to come." 

"Stephano get the job application forms ready. I will send you the qualifications for the scientist and the engineers. I will have the list of names I want on this project to you shortly. Then we will put the applications online with the qualifications for each job title, when these jobs will become available, and the pay scale. I am going to move up the timeline. Instead of 10 years, I am going to move everything up to seven years. We will be building solar power arrays, and wind generator fields first to produce our own electrical energy. We will build dormitories for the single men and women. We will drill to see if we can get to a source of potable drinking water, if not, we will have it trucked in daily. 

Everything electrical will be done by IBEW only. I don't want or need anything screwed up by a bad, or poor connection by a non-union labor member. Delicious is studying to do the electrical drawings for the interior of the craft. I had nothing else for her to do, until the NRC approves the Nuclear Engine. I couldn't let her sit around with nothing to do. I sent her to school under the tutelage of one of my friends to learn how to draw everything electrical. By the time we need her she will be the best in the world. We are six months ahead of schedule, and that is only with four of us working six days a week, 10-hour days, except for Gordon. We make him go over to my attorney's home and play with his children. He gets angry with me, but I am bigger than he is, for the time being, so I win. Doctor Thyme is brilliant. His grasp of what we are aiming for is magnificent. We have much to do, but at this rate, and the cloak of secrecy on our side, we are going to surprise many people with the speed we are going to complete our spacecraft." 

"Mister Schneider when can we expect the results of the stress tests of the carbon fiber?" 

"The large strut and flooring portions are done. You could build a 50-story building with that stuff. It is amazing how strong it is. It's the delicate, curved interior portions we are working with now. We believe the results will be the same, but we are not rushing the tests. We want to be absolutely sure of the results. Do you want us to send you what we have completed so far?" 

"Does it include the outer skin of the vessel, including the fasteners?" 

"Yes it does." 

"Please send the results to me as soon as you can by courier. We can start work on that immediately." 

******* 

54. Another One Bites The Dust... 

"Get the fuck out of this house, before I ring your neck." 

"I live here too, but I'm trying to remember why?" 

"We are getting married in three weeks, that's why." 

"Would you like to make a bet on that Gray?" 

"Do you want out of it? If you do, just say the word and we can cancel everything. I'll move out." 

"No, this is your apartment, I'll leave." 

"Goodbye, have a nice life. I wouldn't go to your father's house if I were you. With all the money he has laid out for this wedding, he will probably bury you in an unmarked grave." 

"I have my own money, I'll pay him back. I don't want to be married to a jackass like you." 

********* 

Logan said, "Isn't love grand. I sure am happy I'm not getting married this month, or next month." 

"Keep your mouth shut or I will shut it for you. Marcie and I are not like them. We don't fight like they do. We are extremely happy together." 

"I'm very happy for you my friend. We've known each other for 24 years, and I never thought I would see the day that you would bite the dust." 

"I never saw it coming myself; she is one awesome woman." 

*************** 

#CRASH* "Get the fuck out of my way." 

"I was going to the bathroom. Do I need to apologize for being alive now?" 

"What a wonderful idea, why don't you." 

Gray had enough. He picked her up and threw her on the bed. 

"If you open your mouth one more time, I'm going to gag you. If you kick me, I'm going to tie your legs to the bed. If you swing at me, I will let you stand up, and have you do your worst. I will do mine. This shit is going to stop now, or I am going to throw you out into the hall, and let Logan take you to a hotel. It's your choice Delicious, how do you want to play this out?" 

"Get out of my way, I'm leaving." 

"Good, I'll help you." 

He pulled her off the bed, threw her over his shoulder, and marched her to the front door. He threw her into Jaden's arms. 

"This bitch wants to leave, help her." 

"Yes sir." 

"Put me down." 

"Yes ma'am." 

She punched in the code for the apartment but it was disabled from the inside. She screamed, "You locked me out you cock sucking sonofabitch. In two days I can buy a gun, and you are going to be target practice." 

He yelled back, "Remember, I have a gun, and if you raise yours at me, I'm going to blow you away before you can blink. You can't do anything better than I can. I kept my promises, every one of them. It doesn't seem that you can keep any of them. Jayden get that bitch out of here before I do it for you." 

"Ma'am, I've never seen him this angry. It would be safer if you would come with me." 

"I need my bag." 

Jayden knocked on the door, and Gray shouted, "WHAT!" 

"Sir, she needs her bag." 

Gray handed Jayden the bag, slammed, and locked the door. 

As they rode down and the elevator Jayden was about to say something, when Delicious said, "Please don't, I feel shitty enough as it is." 

Jayden reminded her to stay in the lobby until he brought the car forward. It took him all of 90 seconds to do it, and by the time he returned she was gone. 

"FUCK!" He got on his cell phone and called Logan. 

"She's running, I went to get the car, and I don't know where she went. She could be anywhere, call the troops." 

As he called for help he banged on Grayson's door. When it was opened he said, "You are not to open this door for any reason, or for anyone, without proper identification. You are going to be alone. Do you understand?" 

"Yes I understand, what's the problem?" 

"It's nothing that concerns you any longer sir." 

"What's the problem Logan?" 

"It's Delicious, she's run away. We don't know where she went." 

"I'll kill her." 

"May I remind you sir; you already threatened to do that. She is no longer your concern sir, you threw her out." 

"Logan one day you are going to fall in love and you will be on the other side of an argument like we had." 

"In that case sir, I'd rather not fall in love. It would hurt too much." 

"Your god damn right it hurts." 

"Where is this goddamn elevator?" 

"Would you like me to call for the elevator sir?" 

"Would you like your job tomorrow Logan?" 

"I've been thinking about moving to the West Coast after Jayden gets hitched." 

"You are so full of shit. Call for the elevator please." 

************* 

Running with Gray had done wonders for her speed and stamina. She knew where she was going, but didn't go there in a straight line. She knew the hounds would be after her, and she did not want to be found. Her cell phone was off, which meant so was her GPS chip inside. She arrived at the school library, but did not sign in as required. She took an elevator to the sixth floor and looked for an empty carrel. She put her bag down; took her purse, and went to a vending machine. She purchased graph paper to draw electrical circuits. It was just after 12 PM when she started. 

*********** 

"How the hell do you think she would get back to me Gray? She can't rent a car she's not 21." 

"I'm sorry Even, I didn't want to call you; but we can't find her. It's like she disappeared." 

"Did you check the airport, train, and bus stations?" 

"Yes, and we are plugged in to their computers to see if she makes a reservation." 

"Did you check the school?" 

"Why would she run to the school?" 

"You are an idiot sometimes Gray. She's comfortable at the school. You made her uncomfortable at home. You kicked her out, and she went to the next place she was comfortable. She went to school." 

"We are on our way. I will call you if we find her." 

Gray yelled, "Jayden, we are going to school." 

"I don't like school." 

"I don't care, we are going to school. Call the troops, call the campus police, tell them were looking for a runaway. I swear I'm going to kill that woman." 

"You have to stop saying that sir. Someone's going to believe you." 

"If it wasn't so true I would try to stop. She has been tormenting me since the day we met." 

"May I ask why you're still with her sir?" 

"I can't breathe without her." 

"You are going to have a very interesting marriage." 

"Do you really think so?" 

******** 

Sixteen men and women formed a walking perimeter around the boundary of the school. Another twelve checked for any open door in the instructional buildings. They were all homing in on the dormitories, where anyone could hide a female student. 

It was 8 PM, when Logan called to say the library was closing. The campus guards said the building was empty, and it had been checked for stragglers. He asked if he should check it again or not." 

Gray shouted, "Logan look under every fucking table, chair, and lamp. Look in every garbage can, and on the top of every shelf. I will make you a bet she's hiding in there somewhere. We are on our way." 

"Call everyone, converge on the library." 

As soon as everyone was inside the building, the doors were locked. They were given there marching orders. No book, table, chair, or garbage can was left unchecked. 

They checked the well, and on the top of each elevator. The second floor was cleared; they went up to the third floor and did it all over again. The fourth floor became a little more complicated, because certain areas were locked. They contained valuable folios and first editions that could not be replaced. The campus police went into those areas and checked them. She wasn't in there either. She wasn't on the fourth floor. 

Gray was beginning to have his doubts with only three more floors to go. 

They saw movement on the fifth floor and everyone shouted. Flashlights pointed in the direction, and cat hissed at them. Words were exchanged, most were of the four-letter kind. Love wasn't one of them. 

The fifth floor was clear. 

The sixth floor was a warren of carrels. Most of these cubbyholes belonged to professors, and they were always locked. Others were used on a daily basis by graduate students studying for their Master's or PhD degrees. 

Gray said, "Shine your flashlight into each one of them. If they are open go in. If it's locked, shine your light into every possible area she could be hiding in. Don't kill her; leave that pleasure for me." 

10 minutes later, Logan got a call. "Boss on your left side 25 yards down, bring Doctor Thyme with you. You have to see this." 

They shined the flashlights through the door, and there she was sleeping across three chairs, with her thumb in her mouth, sucking away. Out came the cell phones, the instant messages. 

Jennifer and I were looking at those pictures seconds after they were taken. She would have another reason to kill him when she saw them. 

"Send everyone back to their posts Logan. Leave me two people who are working the night shift and the telephone number of one of the campus security guards. I'll stay here until she wakes up." 

"Are you two going to kiss and make up, or start another fight?" 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 13



"Why do you need to know?" 

"I have to know if I have to leave one car or two." 

"You better be safe; leave two cars." 

********** 

He wasn't happy lying on the floor. Then he heard the thud and the cry of pain from inside the carrel. 

He jumped to his feet and yelled, "Delicious!" 

"Shut the fuck up, my head hurts." 

"Let me in so I can rip it off." 

She got onto her knees, crawled to the door, and unlocked it. She sat down and held her head. She was bleeding profusely. 

"You fucking idiot look what you've done now. Sydney, call an ambulance." 

He took off his shirt and pressed it against the opening on the top of her head. "Are you hurting anyplace else?" 

"My right shoulder and arm hurt." 

"You're going to be a beautiful bride, with your arm in a cast, and your head bandaged." 

"Who said I'm getting married?" 

"Oh that's right, I'm a free man. From this day on I can fuck whoever I want. I don't have to be celibate anymore. I waited nearly 10 months for someone special, and then she runs away. What a fool I was to believe she would live up to her end of the bargain. Well, there are plenty of flowers to pick from, and from this day forward, I'm going to pick a fresh one daily." 

"You bastard." 

"I know you're not talking to me. I didn't break our deal. My conscience is clear. I wonder if you can go to confession and say the same thing." 

"Why don't you leave me with security, I'll send you a check for your shirt." 

"If that is what you want Miss Luck, I'm gone. Joseph, stay with her please. She goes to the hospital and no place else. If she argues with you; cuff her. If she continues to argue with you, tie her up and make sure she goes to the hospital." 

"As you wish; Doctor Thyme." 

"Joseph, could you help me up please? I want to see if I can walk." 

He took Delicious by the arm, lifted her off the floor until she balanced herself. They walked into the hallway where she took a few steps. 

She said, "Okay I'm going to turn around, and walk back to you." 

"Okay miss." 

Joseph didn't realize who he was dealing with. 

As soon as he turned his back, Delicious ran down the corridor towards Gray. He was just reaching the elevators. His right arm reached the button as her left shoulder impacted his ribs. 

He was stunned as he fell to the floor in pain. 

She popped up, looked down at him, and said, "Now you can leave me you bastard. I wanted you to know what pain felt like." 

He lay on the floor laughing. 

She was so angry there wasn't a color red to describe it. 

"You think that was pain? That was a mere tickle compared to what you do to me. You walk around with a cleaver in your hand, and use it on me every time you open your fucking mouth. You think tackling me is enough to cause me the type of pain you cause me every time we argue. You have to be kidding. Why don't you buy track shoes, and run over my face for an hour or so. Then we may be talking about pain. This was nothing. Keep sucking your thumb little girl, I don't think you're ever going to grow up." 

"I don't suck my thumb." 

"How much would you like to bet?" 

"The usual, $100." 

"Would you like to make it $1 million, you can afford it, and so can I. We own a railroad." 

"Keep your fucking railroad, and marry that tramp Junie Penick. You'll never have to work another day in your life. Won't that be nice for you?" 

"This was a bet about you sucking your thumb, not Junie Penick. Do you want to bet or not?" 

"$100. 

Gray showed her his cell phone. 

Without saying a word, she took her pocketbook from Joseph, pulled out a $100 bill, and handed it to him. 

"Congratulations, there's another thing I can't beat you at." 

Joseph said, "Miss the ambulance is downstairs." 

"Thank you Joseph. 

He didn't get into the elevator with her. There was enough bad blood between them already, there was no sense adding fuel to the fire. 

Sydney came up to him and said, "Sir these were all over the room she was in." 

Hundreds of pictures of his face from every angle imaginable, with little love notes next to each one of them. It wasn't the same love note each time, but a different endearment next to each picture. Which woman was she? Was she only able to think of him in the abstract? This was going to drive him more insane, than he was already. 

"Take me to the hospital Sydney. If you beat the ambulance there, I'll give you $10,000." 

"Let's move it boss, I have no time to lose." 

*********** 

Technically, it was a tie. Sydney screeched to a halt, as the ambulance finished backing in to its spot. He also had three police cars screeching to a halt behind him. 

"Tell them what is happening, and if they don't listen, tell them you'll meet them in court." 

"Thank you sir, do I win?" 

"You bet your ass you do." 

Gray jumped the barrier and ran the 15 feet to the ambulance as they were pulling her out the back doors of the vehicle. 

"That's a silk shirt; the blood will never come out of it." 

"How the fuck did you get here so fast, you imbecile?" 

"I used a transporter device of my own design. Not even you thought up something as revolutionary as that." 

"You are a lying sack of shit." 

The EMTs pulled her inside and set her up in a cubicle. A nurse looked at her head and called a Doctor. He asked Delicious several questions as they hooked her up two IVs. He ordered an x-ray and an MRI, "STAT." 

He turned, looked at me, and asked, "Are you the husband?" 

Gray laughed, "Until 12 o'clock today, I was the fiancé. Then I came to my senses when she left me, Again!" 

As they were pulling Delicious out of her cubicle she screamed, "FUCK YOU GRAY!" 

"I waited almost 10 months for that privilege. You were the one that backed out of our deal. Eat shit and die, Delicious. I won't cry at your funeral. As a matter of fact, I won't be there. I'll call your father and tell him where you are. Don't come back to the apartment, you are not welcome there anymore. Oh, I forgot, these are yours." 

He handed her all her papers, as he stormed out at the emergency room. She looked at them and began to cry. Where had everything gone so wrong? She didn't need to talk to her father. She needed to talk to Jennifer. 

The x-ray showed she had fractured her skull. The MRI verified this, and it was deep enough to require it be operated on immediately. They needed parental consent. They called me and gave me her prognosis. 

I said, "Prepare her for surgery; I will be there in 90 minutes to sign the paperwork." 

With a security car in front and behind us, we roared down Interstate 70 towards Denver. We were doing well over 100 miles an hour, with lights flashing, and sirens blaring into the night. We pulled in front of University Hospital in just under an hour. 

Jennifer and I raced into the hospital, asked where Delicious Luck was, and where the paperwork I had to sign for her surgery was. An aide took us to the surgical wing. 

Delicious head had been shaved and covered with an orange/yellow antibiotic. 

"So help me God dad, if you say one word, or smile, I will get out of this bed and kill you." 

"Who me, I was just looking for my daughter. This must be the wrong room. My daughter has long brown luxurious hair. Come on Jennifer, let's go find her." 

Jennifer's elbow went through my ribs, and into my spleen. She hit me with her elbow many times, but this time she meant business. 

"Husband, you could be dead, but not at the hand of your daughter. Be nice, or you'll never get laid again." 

"That's not fair. I finally have the upper hand on her, and you won't let me say a word." 

"No, not a single word, Even." 

"Not even, I love you?" 

"Are you going to mean it? Are you going to say it without smiling?" 

"I could try to do both those things, but it would be very hard looking at her head." 

"Even, go outside, and call that idiot who was supposed to be your son. Two idiots can make a jerk. Two jerks can make a jerk off." 

"That was not funny Jennifer." 

"It was not meant to be funny. It is true however." 

She pulled up a chair close to Delicious, and asked, "What did you do this time?" 

"I don't know how it started, but I know it never ended, even when he threw me out of the apartment. It began yesterday, and I slept in the spare bedroom, because I didn't want him to touch me. I made breakfast, as usual this morning, and he complained about it. It reignited yesterday's argument. It got worse all morning. Whenever he said anything to me, I said something worse to him. When I was out of the apartment I needed time alone to think. The safest place I knew was in school. I went there to draw some electrical designs and all I could see was his face. I started drawing it over and over and over again. What the hell is wrong with me Jennifer? I want him, and every second we are together we fight." 

"Do you realize how sexually stressed you are? You have been sleeping with that man for nearly 10 months. In a few days you will be 18 years old. Two weeks after that you were supposed to get married. You two are wired as tight as the strings on the violin. Both of you are getting ready to break. I have the answer to your problems if you want to listen to me." 

"Anything Jennifer, I will do anything not to lose him." 

"Did you say 'ANYTHING' Delicious?" 

"Oh God, I hate myself. I hate that word. It gets me in more trouble than I can get out of." 

"Just remember, that was the word you used. I expect you to keep your word." 

"I will keep my word Jennifer. I know I'm in trouble already." 

"Oh yes you are." 

"I hate you Jennifer." 

"When I get finished with you, you are going to hate me a lot more." 

"Oh shit." 

********** 

"She is going to be operated on in the next 10 minutes." 

"Why should I care Even?" 

"According to the surgeon, she may lose all cognitive function. She will have no past, no present, and no future. I will have lost my daughter forever." 

"Even, I never meant for it to go this far. She was just too tough a nut for me to crack. I just wasn't strong enough to do it. I'm so sorry." 

"Her mother said those words to me when she helped me save Jennifer." 

"What words Even?" 

"She is a tough nut to crack. Her mother used to say it to her when she was growing up. Unfortunately, she never will have the chance to do it. Goodbye Gray; you are fired. You are no longer welcome in the lab. I'm sorry but I could not stand to look at you during the day and my daughter all night long. You can keep the railroad stock as your severance package. I liked your father; he seemed like a very good man." 

"I understand Even, goodbye." 

I said to Jennifer, "He should be here in 20 minutes." 

"You are a wonderful liar Even." 

"Delicious told me I am a terrible liar." 

"That's because you had nothing good to lie about. These are extenuating circumstances. I need him alone, in a room for about 10 minutes. If you hear a scream, you will know he will never be able to produce an heir with anyone." 

"You women are mean." 

"No, we are just practical." 

Gray was in the surgical waiting room in 15 minutes. 

Jennifer started in before he sat down. "Did you come to gloat over your victory Gray? Go home, you are not wanted here." 

"Leave the boy alone Jennifer." 

"Why, he's the reason all this happened. Gray and his god damn ego. It had to be his way or the highway. He kicked her out of her home. How cruel can a mature man get then to kick a 17-year-old girl out of her home? Well, he will never have to worry about that again, will he. She will stare at walls for the rest of her life and not see them. Isn't that what you wanted Gray? Throw her to the wolves. She is no longer your responsibility, because she wouldn't bend to your will. Goodbye, no more Delicious to worry about; next submissive please. Where do you get them Doctor Thyme, "Submissive's are us? Is that why you didn't have sex with Delicious? She wasn't legal. You thought of everything, didn't you?" 

"It wasn't like that Jennifer. Sure we argued, but we never waged war like we have in the last few weeks." 

Several people joined them in the waiting room, waiting for their loved ones to come out of surgery. 

"Gray, come with me. Even block the door." 

Gray said, "I don't like the sound of this." 

"If you walk out alive, you can thank your lucky stars. Even just lost his daughter, if he walked into that room with you, one of you wouldn't come out alive. In his state of mind, I would bet on Even." 

A nurse strolled by room 367. She saw three men and one woman dressed in black bracketing it. There was one man standing by the door with his ear pressed against it. She was curious, but not curious enough to ask what was going on in there. They had many high profile patients in the past. They came in under assumed names, and this type of security was not unusual. 

Jennifer was reading Gray his death warrant. "Go back to Pennsylvania, and don't stray below the Mason Dixon line. Don't walk over it; take a train, bus, or airplane, because if we will find out about it, it will be the last day of your life. Even loved you like a son. He wanted to work with you because he saw brilliance in your future. You have taken his first child, a child he had with his sister, and didn't know about until a year ago. He can never forgive you for that. Why did you do that to him; because you were sexually frustrated with his daughter? In a few days she is going to be 18. Two weeks later, you were going to be married. You had waited such a long time for each other, and with a few weeks left to go, your ego overrules your common sense. 

She says North, you say South. She says right, you say left. You can't have your way. You are the man of the house. You can yell louder, longer, and you are stronger than she is. You threatened her, and then you throw her out of her home. How masculine of you. You won the battle, and lost the war. Aren't you happy with yourself?" 

Gray paced the room and did not answer. 

"God dammit Gray, answer me. Aren't you happy now?" 

"No, I'm not happy. I'm not happy about her situation. What am I supposed to do about it now? I would give up both my arms to have her back, but she still wouldn't talk to me. We would just yell at each other over and over again." 

"Did I ever tell you what Even did to me a week before our wedding." 

"No you didn't." 

"We were supposed to meet at the hotel for a late lunch, but no exact time was given. I got there around 4PM, called him. I screamed where the hell are you Even. He asked me where are you, Jennifer. I told him I was at the hotel waiting for him. He said he would drop everything and rush right over. I was furious. I marched up and down the lobby waiting for him. He came in the side door with Gordon and watched me. As I walked towards the front, he and Gordon sat down on a lounge, and continued to watch me pace up and down. I must have done this for about five or six minutes until I caught sight of them. 

I asked Gordon, "How long have you been sitting there?" 

He said, "A long time mommy." 

"Gordon, unless you want to get blood all over your new clothes, I would get away from your father." 

Even stood up and said, "What did we do wrong? We had no knowledge of the time we were supposed to be here. When you called we stopped everything and came right here. You seem so engrossed in what you were doing; we sat down and watched you do it. We didn't want to interrupt your train of thought." 

"I wanted to kill him, but his logic was flawless. Flawless until Gordon said they had just finished eating at Wendy's, and I was starving. 

Even said, "Come with me." He took me upstairs. He had the staff change into their evening dress clothes, change the table linens, and took us to the best table in the house. He wined and dined me as he promised he would do. How can you argue with a man like that?" 

"You can't argue with him, because he did everything he promised you." 

"Did you do everything you promised Delicious; not only the sexually, which I know you have, but everything else you've promised her? You said to her today you could go to confession with a clear mind, and say you never broke a promise to her. Is that true?" 

"Why don't you just get a gun and shoot me Jennifer. It will be less painful." 

"Why don't you go to the chapel and pray for forgiveness?" 

"I don't think he would forgive me." 

Jennifer crossed the room and smacked him. "The creator is a SHE, and don't you ever forget that. Only women can give birth. I was reminded of that quite painfully a short time ago." 

"Why do women always hit." 

"We have excellent male teachers." 

*********** 

Jennifer opened the door to the room, and led Gray out. She said to Logan, "He's going to look for some divine guidance in the chapel. If he doesn't find it there, take him outside and see if you can find it for him, in a more elemental way." 

"Is there anything specific we should focus on Mrs. Luck?" 

"Well, he did say he would give up both arms to have her back the way she was. You could start there." 

"Very good ma'am, they fit in flower boxes very well." 

Jennifer replied, "It's a shame Delicious won't know what they are." 

As they walked towards the elevator, I said, "Are we overplaying our hand just a little bit Jen?" 

"A little, I have never played a hand so over the top as I am playing this one. He may want to kill us before the wedding." 

"Us, what did I do?" 

"Abandoning the ship already captain?" 

"If that asshole in Italy can do it, why can't I?" 

"I will give you three good reasons: Delicious, Gordon, and Richard. Where I go, they go." 

"Are you moving back into your grandmother's home?" 

"No, I'm moving back to Alaska. My inheritance comes through in three months, and my loving husband has given me $5 million in case of emergencies. Wasn't that kind of him? I will never be poor again." 

"You were never poor." 

"Oh yes, you're right, I was never poor." 

"I don't have a big enough boat to turn over." 

"With all your money, you could buy your own fleet." 

"I'm building a spacecraft instead." 

"Then keep your eyes on the prize captain, and let's get that thing off the ground." 

"I don't know if I'm going." 

"What did you say Even?" 

"When my sister visited my dream to save you, she said that Delicious' would reach the stars and all of her dreams would come true. She never said my dreams would come true. I don't know if it means I will be staying on Earth, or not reaching the next star system, but I do know that our ship will make it." 

"Oh Even, I'm so sorry. Either way, I'm staying with you." 

"No you can't. You and the children are an integral part of the plan. If you don't go, Gordon will not want to go. Everything will fall apart without him. Who knows what part Richard will play as he gets older? Children are the future of this project. The younger and smarter our crew is, the greater the possibility of the success of our mission. 

There can be no such thing as monogamy, but the woman will always control who she mates with. Rape will be a death penalty offense. It cannot be tolerated among a small group of people. 

I'm going to increase the size of the ship, from a diameter 150 to 200 feet. We will need more stasis chambers, and replacements for those that break down, or become irreparable. 

I keep wondering about so many different things I don't know which way to go first." 

"Can the pilot in command make a suggestion?" 

"Yes, I'm always open to suggestions, especially from someone as beautiful as my wife." 

"Tell Sequoia to keep a list of everything you think about during the day. As soon as you queue it up the next morning have it say to you, "Good morning Doctor Luck, here are your memos from yesterday. Let it print it out for you so you can see what you thought about the day or week before. Keep a running log and never erase it." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 13



"When did you get so smart?" 

"When I met this guy on an airplane." 

"Yes, he had a sign on his neck that said, "I am very rich, marry me." 

"The way you were dressed, any normal girl would have run away." 

"Are you saying you are abnormal?" 

"As abnormal as they make them." 

"In that case, you married the right man. Everyone thinks I'm crazy." 

"An abnormal woman marries a crazy man, and they have a baby. I wonder what Richard's going to be like." 

"Probably like Oppenheimer; no one ever knew what he was thinking, but he always got the job done." 

************* 

Doctor Pearson walked down the corridor smiling. 

"Doctor Luck, I don't know what she hit, but it looked almost like a Superman reverse 'S' on top of her head. The repair was very simple, and there is no damage to her brain. It's not even swelling. She is a very lucky girl. Get her a good wig, until her hair grows in, and it will be like nothing ever happened to her." 

"When can we see her?" 

"She will be back in her room in less than an hour. She may be a little groggy but she will be conscious. I will be back to check on her before I go home." 

"Thank you Doctor, you work is much appreciated." 

Jennifer whispered in my ear, "This is too good. We just have to remember that Gray has a gun, and he will use it on us." 

"Sydney, Doctor Thyme is not allowed near Delicious room until I say it is okay." 

"Yes ma'am, just remember he can shoot at us also." 

"If he does, shoot him in the legs, but not the third leg." 

"As you wish ma'am." 

"Joseph, go to the chapel and tell Doctor Thyme they are closing up Delicious now. She is breathing on her own, but there is no cognitive brain activity. She should be out of postop in an hour and in her room in 20 minutes later. When Doctor Luck and I leave, he can visit her if he wants. Otherwise, he can go home now. It's all over." 

Gray cried when he heard the news. Every dream he had for his future had just died. Nothing meant anything to him anymore. Every argument they had paled into insignificance now that she was mentally gone. He stood up to leave and found himself face to face with Jayden. 

"Sit down sir; whatever you are thinking now is irrational. I'm getting married next month, and I need this job." 

"Are you a mind reader now Jayden?" 

"You don't have to be a mind reader to know what you are thinking sir. It will last a few days, as it did when I was in Iraq, and then you will move on. I wasn't as deeply in love with my buddies as you are with Miss Delicious. Soon your mind will compartmentalize it, and you will move on with your life. I'm sorry for your loss." 

As he returned to the back wall of the chapel, Logan said, "You deserve an Academy Award for that performance. You didn't even break a smile." 

"I was good wasn't I?" 

"It was the best I've ever seen you." 

****** 

Delicious was sleeping in her bed, with a little drool coming out the side of her mouth. I went to dab it off with my handkerchief, when Jennifer stopped me. 

"Leave it there for effect." 

"You are terrible." 

"When you are at war, you use everything to your advantage. Right now, it's that little bit of drool." 

"Jennifer remind me never to get into an argument with you, you cheat." 

"You're just finding that out now?" 

"You have blinded me by love. You can have everything I have, without asking for it." 

"You've just taken all the fun out of my life. What's the sense of cheating, if I can have it for free?" 

"You see, I can cheat to." 

"I don't like you Even Luck." 

"I love you Jennifer Luck." 

"That's cheating Even!" 

"Sue me." 

"I can't, I would have to sue one of your corporations, and I am a partner in all of them." 

"Do you see my love, I cheated again." 

"Joseph, you can tell Doctor Thyme he can see Delicious now. We are leaving. Close the door while he's in there with her. If things start crashing around the room, get in here and save him." 

"This has turned out to be a very interesting day ma'am." 

"If you think today has been interesting, wait until tomorrow." 

"Should I wear my vest?" 

"We are going to be wearing ours." 

"I'll warn the troop's ma'am." 

****** 

Gray stopped at the side of her bed. She was bandaged from her eyebrows to the base of her skull. Three IV bags hung from the tree, feeding fluids into her body. She was pale as a ghost, and had fluid bubbling from the side of her mouth. He lowered the side rail of her bed, took some tissues, and cleaned her face. 

He sat on the edge, and said to her, "I never meant for this to happen. You make me so angry, you drive me insane. I look forward to my life without you, and I see nothing. It's exactly what your father tells me you are going to do for the rest of yours. 'Looking but not seeing or thinking.' Such a beautiful young woman, with a mind like no other, doomed to darkness forever, because we couldn't agree to disagree. Isn't that the most stupid thing you have ever heard? We had to argue over everything. The arguing turned to yelling, the yelling led to fighting, and the fighting led to wars between us. This last one sent me over the top. I went to thermonuclear, and here you are. Congratulations, I win, but I lost everything I ever wanted in life." 

"What are you babbling about now Gray? Why are you even here?" 

"You're talking, why are you able to talk? Why are you able to hear? Why are you able to do anything at all? The doctor's said you had no cognitive function." 

"You are the biggest asshole I've ever met. I had a crack in my head. They put a mixture playdoh and crazy glue together and patched me up. When my hair grows back you will never know anything ever happened to me." 

"I'm going to kill them. They played me." 

"Who played you; two infants playing in a sand box? It wouldn't take anyone with a brain to play you." 

"Delicious, don't start with me. You are already in a hospital; you could be here a lot longer if you start with me." 

"And you could be in jail." 

"Between what Jennifer and your father did to me today, I would ask for an expedited trial, and a death sentence without appeal. They would both be dead alongside you." 

"What happened to "Congratulations, I win, but I lost everything I ever wanted in life." 

"That's not fair I thought you couldn't hear me." 

"So you didn't mean it, you can leave now." 

"You are the devil herself. Of course I meant it, but you drive me absolutely insane. You would drive God herself insane." 

"Who told you God was a woman?" 

"Jennifer, right after she hit me." 

Delicious giggled. "She does have a way about her, doesn't she?" 

"I am no longer allowed south of the Mason Dixon line, otherwise I'm dead." 

"I'm beginning to like my mother better and better every day. The further you are away from me, the less we can argue." 

"Is that what you've decided? Is that what you really want, because if it is I will pack my clothes and be out of here before your birthday. I couldn't stand the thought of being near you when you were legal." 

"Yes, legal, but unmarried." 

"That would be your choice, not mine." 

"So you would marry a woman that drive you insane?" 

"I can't breathe without you near me. I can't think when we argue. I have a choice; die from asphyxiation, or being driven insane by the woman I love. I'll take what I can get." 

"I went to the library to draw electrical graphs, and all I could see was your face. I couldn't draw anything else. For hours on end that's all I did. I couldn't concentrate on anything else. I think deep inside I was trying to tell myself something. Jennifer made it easy to understand what it was. I need to get laid. She says I am sexually frustrated with you. I need you inside me desperately. I think the arguing will stop when we start making love. She told me we are wired as tight as the strings of the violin, and we are ready to break. I don't know if I can last three more weeks. Jennifer said she has the answer to our problem and I said the wrong word. I said I would do ANYTHING not to lose you. She smiled evilly at me and made me promise to keep my word. I always keep my word." 

"No you don't." 

"I keep my word to everyone but you, because you drive me crazy." 

"How about your father?" 

"He doesn't count, he's family." 

"Do you have any more excuses?" 

"Do you want to start another argument; if you do please leave." 

"I'm not going anywhere." 

"Then get undressed, turn off the lights and get into bed with me. I'm tired." 

"The nurses will have a fit." 

"Ask me if I care?" 

"Move over, I need more room." 

"I'm the sick one, you will have to make do." 

"I will have to grab onto something to make sure I don't fall off the bed, and cracked my skull open." 

"Bald men looked distinguished." 

He climbed into bed and lay down on his side. "Can I kiss you, or are you going to bite my lip off?" 

"Take your chances and see what happens. Just don't touch my head." 

"I like playing with silly putty." 

"It's not silly putty, its playdoh." 

He kissed her, and she returned it passionately. He felt himself sliding off the bed, and reached for anything that would stabilize him. It just happened to be at the apex of her thighs. She opened her thighs, hoping for more than just an innocent touch. 

"Lift up my gown Gray, please touch me." 

"You're sick." 

"If you don't touch me, you're going to be dead." 

"If you scream we are going to have a lot of company." 

"Five, four, three..." 

Gray's fingers found their way through her distended lips and to the button which was out from under its hood. As soon as he touched it she went into spasm. Her mouth opened to scream, but his descended over hers to smother it. He didn't let up on her, as his fingers traveled south, into her opening. His thumb circled, opening her wider and wider, until her hips joined his movement. He added a second finger to probe her insides deep enough to touch her hymen. He banged against it, but not enough to break it. He whispered into her ear, "This is mine, and no one else's. I'm going to take it from your body and hang it from our wall so no one else can say they had you before me." 

She bit her lips, flooded his hand, and the bed below her. 

"I think I needed that Gray." 

"I think so too. Now I have a problem." 

"I'll take care of you after they finish giving out the medicine." 

"Is that a promise?" 

"Yes, and I will keep my word." 

"I can wait." 

******** 

Greta opened the door a few inches and said, "You are going to have company in less than five minutes." 

Neither occupant of the room heard her. They were locked in each other's arms, sleeping peacefully. 

The nurse pulled the automated medicine cart up to Delicious' room, punched in Delicious name, pulled out the appropriate medicines, put them in little paper cups, walked into the room and turned on the light. 

"What the hell is going on in here?" 

Delicious replied, "What does it look like we were doing until you walked in screaming? We were sleeping." 

"He can't be in bed with you, it's against hospital policy." 

"Is it against hospital policy for someone to help a patient get better?" 

"No." 

"I have been so agitated since my surgery I could not rest. When my fiancée got into bed, and held me, I was able to relax and fall asleep. I didn't need any drugs to dull my mind, and impede my recovery. I just needed him to be with me. If you take him away from me I will be a basket case all night." 

Doctor Pearson was standing inside the entranceway to the room and asked the nurse, "Which is better Maxine, drugs or companionship?" 

"As long as you sign off on it Doctor, my conscience is clear." 

"Give her the meds, I'll take her vitals and give you the numbers. You can wake her up in the morning to do it again. Just make sure it's her and not him." 

"I know a definite way to check Doctor." 

"I remember that only too well Maxine." 

"So do I Fred. Take these please Miss Luck and I will leave you to the capable hands of Doctor Pearson. Watch out for him, his hands have been known to roam." 

"From that conversation, I take it you have a great deal of knowledge about those hands." 

"It is against hospital policy to start rumors that are true." 

Doctor Pearson asked, "How are you feeling Miss Luck?" 

"Probably just like you Doctor, with my hands." 

"Is she always this funny sir?" 

"I'm sorry Doctor, Doctor Grayson Thyme, at your service." 

"Miss Luck are there nothing but doctor's running around your home?" 

"My five-year-old brother, Gordon, has not received his Doctoral Degree yet. He should get it within the next year or so. That young boy is absolutely brilliant." 

"Please tell me you're kidding me." 

"You know my father, Doctor Thyme, and many others are going to building a spacecraft to take us to another part of our universe. Gordon is the Navigator; and that is not a joke. He is as smart as or smarter than any mathematician on this planet. My IQ is 207 and he is smarter than I am." 

Gray said, "I hate her. My IQ is 196, and she blows me away. How do you think I feel looking down at a five-year-old boy who can figure out a mathematical problem in his head and I'm working with the computer trying to do it. Sometimes life is not fair, especially when it comes in small packages like Gordon." 

Doctor Pearson said, "I'm not going to tell you what my IQ is, because I would embarrass myself. You people are insane. What you must be working on is light years ahead of anything people are thinking about now." 

"Doctor, the two engines that are already built are 50 to 100 years ahead of anything NASA has on the drawing board. The third one is nuclear, and is in the hands of the NRC. I will make you a wager that they have no idea what they're looking at, and will have to call her into their facility to explain what is going on inside of it." 

"Miss Luck don't fall down again. What's inside that head of yours is too precious to lose. In years to come people will talk about you in the same vein as your father. You will both be called crazy in the best possible way." 

"Can I tell him that please?" 

"Yes, and with my best wishes, and hope for the greatest success of his mission. Go to sleep, and I mean sleep. There is no fucking around in my hospital by patients. Staff is a different animal." 

"Good night Doctor Pearson, keep your end up as long as you can." 

"Since my wife left me for another woman, I have been keeping that end up longer and more frequently." 

"Good for you Doctor, would you ask Greta to step into the room for a moment." 

"Yes Miss Luck, how may help you?" 

"Nobody comes into this room for the next two hours, under penalty of death." 

"Understood ma'am, enjoy yourself." 

Delicious looked into Gray's eyes and said, "Sir, I believe you had a joint with a very stiff neck. Would you like me to lubricate it for you?" 

"Miss Luck, you better be very careful with that joint, especially at the neck. It may blow its top." 

"In that case Doctor Thyme, I'll take it slow and easy." 

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. I might take things into my own hands and speed up the process considerably." 

"I'll play with your dangling participle's to keep you under control. I understand with the appropriate amount of pressure on those jewels, even giants fall to their knees." 

"So help me God Delicious, if you don't start I'm going to cum on your face while we're talking." 

"Spontaneous combustion, I've never seen that before." 

"Delicious..." He threw his head back as her mouth descend over his pride and joy. 

******** 

"Honey, Rod is a Notary Public isn't he?" 

"Of course he is. He notarize is half the towns documents. The town clerk notarizes everything for us. At the end of the fiscal year they checked to see who owes who money. Normally the town owes him money." 

"Even, where is my hand?" 

"In a very wonderful place." 

"If you were to move very quickly what would happen to that wonderful place?" 

"It could be torn from my body and cause me horrific pain." 

"Does that mean you're going to listen to every word I'm going to say, with an open mind and not yell at me, because I have your daughter's best interest at heart?" 

"Is this a continuation of our discussion from earlier this evening?" 

"Sort of, kind of, yes it is." 

"In this melodrama, am I'm playing Jayden, Gray, or Delicious." 

"None of the above dear, you will be playing Rod." 

"Oh good, I'm not in trouble, or am I?" 

"If you play your cards right, you are the good guy all the way through." 

"I like that part a lot. What do I have to do?" 

"You do what you do so well: LIE" 

"I can do that." 

"I knew I could count on you. Here is the plan." 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 

"Rod will kill us both!" 

"Not if you give him a letter of dismissal." 

"I can't do that to him. He's been my friend since we were five years old. I'd rather shoot myself in the foot then do that to him. Why are you squeezing my balls?" 

"I'm just trying to get your mind back to my plan." 

"You have my attention, I don't want to lose my friend. Stop squeezing my balls. Okay, okay, I'll think about it . Jennifer you don't play fair. I'm beginning not to like you." 

"Remember, this is for your daughter's future happiness." 

"Rod is going to kill us." 

"Trust me, Rod will be your friend after all of this is over." 

"He's my only friend." 

"I'll buy you another one." 

"I don't want you to buy me a friend, I want Rod." 

"Stop pouting, Rod will still be your friend, after he gets out of prison for attempted murder." 

"I'm sure I don't like you." 

"Richard is crying, it's your turn." 

"I can't move." 

"Why?" 

"Your hand is still squeezing my balls." 

"Whoops, sorry about that." 

"I'm sure you are. I want Rod." 

"Stop pouting, I'm sure Rod will still want to be your friend when this is over. You may have to give him a raise, maybe a substantial raise, but he will still be your friend." 

"I'll probably have to buy him a car too. He's going to own me for a long time." 

"He can only own you for seven years, and then we're going to move a long way from here. We're going to be away; far, far away. He can't file a lawsuit against you, if he can't find you." 

I smiled. "Jennifer, you are evil. You are also very smart. I like that last part. I don't like parts 1, 2, 3, and 4, but number 5 is a winner. I'll keep you as my wife until the end of my life." 

"I think you said that already Even." 

"I was just reminding you of it. Tomorrow is going to be a weird day. I'm coming Richard; I'll be right back cheater." 

************ 

"Hi mom, is dad gone yet?" 

"What are you doing up Gordon?" 

"I heard my brother crying, so I figured I would come in here and keep you company, while dad is changing him. What's up?" 

"What do you mean what's up?" 

"You and dad don't exactly whisper when you talk. Why are you firing Uncle Rod?" 

"We are not firing Uncle Rod. We have some delicate maneuvering to do that concerns him, but it also concerns your sisters future. We need Rod to do us a very big favor, in a very big hurry. We don't want him to think about it, we just want him to do it. If he starts thinking, it could take weeks. We need this done by tomorrow night." 

"Why don't you just tell him the truth?" 

"When you get older you will realize the truth doesn't always work. You have to work around the edges of the truth to get the job done." 

"I will never understand why adults always say 'when you get older you will understand.' If I told you a lie, you would spank me. If I told you a long story and got to the same point an hour later, you would still spank me. The only difference to me is I got spanked later in the day. I still got spanked. Tell Uncle Rod the truth and get it over with. The worst thing he can say to you is no, and when he does, then you can fire him." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 13



"Gordon, you are absolutely brilliant." 

"I know." 

"Go to bed before I spank you." 

"What did I do wrong now?" 

"It's 2:15 AM, you are supposed to be asleep." 

"I'm just keeping you company until dad figures out which way the tape is supposed to go on Richard's diaper. It could take him another hour." 

"Well, why don't you go in there and show him." 

"What fun would that be. The diaper companies would not be able to declare a dividend, and my stocks would lose money." 

"Young man if I have to get out of bed to show your father how to fix the diapers, you are going to be in big trouble." 

"Mommy, it's 2:16 AM, I am supposed to be asleep. Good night." 

"Gordon, you're getting a spanking in the morning!" 

"Okay, but you're getting out of bed tonight." 

"Wiseass!" 

Jennifer walked into Richard's room, and there I was sitting in the rocking chair with my little boy in my arms. He was wide-awake. 

"What is taking you so long?" 

"Our son does not wish to go back to sleep. So I am rocking him, and watching him smile. He doesn't seem to be hungry, he just wants to look around." 

"How many diapers did you waste?" 

"None, I've got that down to a science now. Why, did you expect me to be unable to diaper my own son." 

"You did have me worried for a while." 

"You had me worried for a while with the coffee maker." 

"That is not a coffee maker. That's a machine made in hell. 'Unplug before pouring water into the reservoir. Raise the reservoir cover before filling with water. Do not fill reservoir below this line, or above this line. Plug coffee maker in. Never turn the coffee maker on, while you are grinding your freshly roasted beans. Never grind your freshly roasted beans, while you are brewing your coffee. Always empty the used coffee grounds and the paper filter after they have cooled. Always place a new brown paper filter in the receptacle before returning receptacle to its proper place. Use 115/120 Volt Alternating Current only. Clean the bean grinder every thirty days with stainless steel cleaner. Rinse with distilled water only. Lubricate with a non-petroleum based product only. Clean excess lubricant with cotton ball. Remove excess cotton strands by hand. ENJOY YOUR FRESHLY BREWED CUP OF COFFEE!" Then in very small print it says, Made in Bangladesh. 

You need a fucking Master's Degree to work the damn thing. " 

Richard was unhappy with his mother's outburst and he began to cry. 

"Now look what you've done. He was perfectly content, until you lost your temper over a little coffee machine." 

"Little; that thing takes up half the counter." 

"Jennifer, if you don't like it, give it to the church and get a smaller one." 

"What, really, you wouldn't mind?" 

"It was given to me by a Brazilian guy I met at a conference in Rio de Janeiro. He told me he had a problem with iron infiltrating his home drinking water coming from his well, even though he had a water filtration system. I asked him how long the run was from his house to the pump, and from the pump down to the water level. He told me, and I told him how to fix it with less than $300 cost. He told me it was impossible, because everyone else he asked said it would be $6000 to $7000 to repair the system. I told him to try it my way first. If it didn't work all he was out was $300. The coffee machine was my present." 

"Even, you are crazy." 

"I know." 

"I just got that answer from another member of our family." 

"I know." 

"I should kill you both." 

"How are we going to work with Rod tomorrow morning?" 

"Let's do it Gordon's way. We will write up Rods termination letter, then go over to his house. We will tell him exactly what we discussed. You will tell him how we want it done and when we want it done by. When he laughs at us and says no, stand up, say thank you, hand him his termination letter, get Gordon, and leave. He will sit there reading the letter stunned. I would suspect we will be talking to him before we get to the car." 

"I hope he's not shooting at us before we get to the car." 

"Have a little faith in your wife Even, she waited a lot of years to meet you, and you waited more years to meet her. We are going to make beautiful music tomorrow, even though it's going to be Rod that's singing." 

"He's going to kill me." 

"It's for your daughter's happiness." 

"My sister didn't tell me it was going to be this hard to make my daughter's dreams come true. She could have given me a magic wand or something." 

"If everything was easy, there would be no fun in life." 

"How would you know you weren't having fun if everything was easy?" 

"Why are you always so negative." 

"I thought what I said was positive." 

*********** 

I don't believe I slept a wink for the rest of the night 

I was out of bed, showered, shaved, and fully dressed, while my wife slept peacefully. Richard was fussing in his crib, so I took him downstairs with me. I put him in his automatic rocker. He fell asleep, while I made my coffee in the machine made in hell. Not even the grinder bothered him. I took out a legal pad and started writing a draft of Rod's termination letter. I had never done anything so hard in my life. Every word I wrote down was like putting a knife through my heart, even though I knew it was not for real. As I wrote the sentence, "your services are no longer required," I was crying like a baby. How could I possibly do this to my best friend. Not only my best friend, the only friend I had ever had. It would probably remain that way because of the way I worked. Would this fracture our friendship forever? Would he ever forgive me for doing this to him? I tried to put myself in his place, and I couldn't answer that question. I knew he would be fine financially, but that didn't matter to me. What mattered to me was us; and how we would be after today. Now I knew why married life could be so hard. Sometimes you had to choose between your family, and your friends, and it's a bitch. 

Jennifer whispered in my ear, "Even everything is going to be fine. You will still be friends this evening. I promise, stop thinking about it." 

"I can't think about anything else Jen. I don't know what I'd do without him." 

"Rosalynn and I will tie him up and make him listen to logic. Once he's listened he will be fine; trust me." 

"This is probably why my sister didn't say my dreams were going to come true. Rods going to kill me today." 

"Doctor Even Luck, you stop this nonsense this instant. Everything is going to be fine today. If it's not, I'll give you a blowjob in the median of Interstate 70." 

"Can I bring my moving camera?" 

"You can call all three new stations if you'd like." 

"This could get interesting." 

"It's 8 o'clock, call Roz and tell her will be there by 9:30AM. We have something important we need done by Rod today. He had better be ready to work his ass off." 

"You call her." 

"Even pick up the god damn phone now!" 

"Yes dear. 

*************** 

"You want me to do what?" 

"Don't go brain-dead on me now Rod, it's all very simple: Pick up a marriage certificate. Fill out the entire form with both their names on it. Fill out the witnesses with Jennifer and my name on it and we will sign it. You will come to the hospital tomorrow to wish her a happy birthday and tell her she has to sign this form and so does he. Joke with them saying, "Are you sure you want to marry Grayson Thyme? Ask him if he wants to marry Delicious Luck. Have the papers already notarized; say congratulations Mister and Mrs. Grayson Thyme, hand me the papers and run like hell." 

"Even, you have finally done it. You have finally gone over to the dark side. I am going to have you committed to an asylum for the next 50 years. You are deranged. I won't do it. It's illegal, it's immoral. You can't trick people into getting married. They will hate me and they will hate you for the rest of our lives. I will lose my license. I like being a lawyer." 

"They can always get it annulled if they don't consummate their marriage." 

"They can sue us into oblivion. They can take my license and my balls." 

"I need an answer right now Rod; I need all of this done today." 

"I'm sorry Even I won't do it; I just won't do it." 

"I'm sorry too Rod. Jennifer get Gordon please, we're leaving. Rod, here is a notice of Termination of Services. You are no longer my attorney." 

"What did you say?" 

"In that envelope is your notice of Termination of Employment. My new lawyer will call you for the transfer of my documents and financial accounts. I'm sorry it came to this, but I needed everything done today, and you refused me. A true friend would not have done that to me knowing that my daughter's future is at stake." 

"Even..." 

"We are ready to go Even. Goodbye Roz, I hope our children can still play together." 

"Of course they can. I'll see you out." 

"Put Gordon in his car seat Even, I want to speak to Roz for a second." 

"Okay." 

"Roz, how long before it breaks?" 

"If he doesn't throw himself under the wheels of your car to stop you from leaving; your phone will be ringing when you get home. Where do the women in your home come up with these evil ideas. Between you and Delicious, I'm surprised my husband is still sane." 

"You will never get pregnant again." 

"Yes, and that was with three hours on an airplane. Can you imagine what she would have done to him on a 17 hour trip to New Zealand?" 

"He would've been a Catholic priest who practiced Zen Buddhism." 

"Don't make me laugh, I'm supposed to be very disheartened, because my husband just lost a very lucrative job." 

"Should I have Gordon jump on your foot to make you cry?" 

"No thank you, I'll manage. I'll see you tomorrow, 10 AM, at the hospital. I'll send flowers." 

"That will be a nice touch." 

After Jen put Richard in the baby carrier, I started the car and asked her what she and Roz talked about. 

"I told Roz that this was the hardest decision you ever had to make. It was a choice between your best friend and your daughter. You had to choose your daughter because of the situation she finds herself in.. I told her to keep an eye on Rod and make sure he did not do anything foolish. You would be devastated if he did." 

"That was a very nice speech. Now what did you and Roz talk about?" 

"You don't believe me?" 

"Not one word." 

"I'm insulted." 

"You could be barbecued, braised, baked, or broiled, I don't care; what did you and Roz talk about." 

"I asked her how long it took to cook a turkey." 

"And her answer was?" 

"By the time we get home." 

"She was in on this?" 

"Yes." 

"You didn't bother to tell me that fact did you." 

"No, I needed you to act appropriately, which you did." 

"Gordon, what happens to people that lie?" 

"They get a spanking dad." 

"I just caught your mother in a very big lie. She is going to get a very big spanking when Richard goes to sleep. You may have to cover your ears, because she is going to be screaming." 

"If it's okay with you dad, I'd rather listen." 

"Why is that Gordon?" 

"At 2:16 AM she threatened to spank me because I wasn't asleep. She also threatened to spank me, because I wouldn't go into Richard's room to see if you were messing up the tapes on the diapers again. I couldn't be in two places at one time so I went to bed." 

"That was an excellent choice Gordon. I would have done the same thing, because Richard was not crying." 

"Our next child better be a girl Even. I'm surrounded by men and they are picking on me." 

******** 

We walked into the house, but the phone was not ringing. I took Richard into the den and lay him into his day crib for a nap. Montgomarie took Gordon down to the lab so he could play on Sequoia 2. He had found another planet he was interested in; Kepler 298D. It was only 11.9 light years away and it showed every sign of habitability. However there wasn't much information available on it. He sent requests to several research institutions to see if they were studying this exoplanet in depth, but so far none had responded to his requests. 

After 15 minutes of staring at the damn telephone I couldn't take it anymore. I went down to the lab and started to work. After a while, my mind went on automatic, and I functioned like a robot. Task after task was completed, and I moved on to the next experiment. I was so engrossed in my work I did not know how many hours had passed by, or the time of day. I didn't hear Jen call me. She came down to the lab and touched me on my shoulder. I nearly jumped through the ceiling. 

"I'm sorry I startled you darling, but Rod is here." 

I followed her up the stairs expecting to see a pile of boxes containing all my files, but there were none. He was sitting at the table, with a glass of ice water, nervously twirling it in his hand. 

"Hello Rod, what can I do for you?" 

"I want my job back. I'll take a cut in pay I'll do whatever you ask, but I don't think I could survive without your friendship." 

"You could never lose my friendship. I wanted to kill someone when they brought up this harebrained scheme, but I didn't want to go to prison for the remainder of my life. If that person ever comes between us again that person and I are going to have a very long talk aren't we?" 

"Yes dear." 

"Have you been brought up to date as to the happenings between my daughter and Gray?" 

"Yes, Roz told me what happened yesterday. I went to City Hall and got all the paperwork taken care of. I had copies made of everything. If I can get them to sign two or three of them, you can keep one original, they can keep another, and the third can go to the church for that wedding." 

"Will you be able to be bright and bubbly tomorrow in the hospital?" 

"I will give it that good old college try." 

"You said you would take a pay cut. How much do I pay you?" 

"$2.5 million a year." 

"If you are not bubbly tomorrow it goes down to $1.5 million a year. If you are bright and bubbly, as I expect you will be, it will go up to $5 million a year." 

"$5 million!" 

"Did I stutter Jennifer?" 

"No Even, $5 million came out loud and clear." 

"I wonder how he would react if I would say $10 million." 

"I think he would do to you what I said I would do to you on Interstate 70." 

"With the news trucks and all?" 

"I think he would even call in cable and satellite." 

"What are you two talking about?" 

"I told my darling husband everything would be fine today. I told him if it wasn't I would give him a blowjob in the median of Interstate 70. When he said I wonder what you would do if he offered you $10 million a year, I said you would do to him what I offered to do to him in the middle of the highway." 

"Jen, we are not that friendly. I admit I might think about it, I might think about it a lot, but we are not that friendly." 

"So you're going to be able to be funny tomorrow?" 

"I will have no trouble being funny at all." 

"I'm very happy for both of you. You two should have married when you were five." 

"Divine wouldn't let us. She didn't like me." 

************ 

We arrived at the hospital at 10:30A.M. Jennifer and Gordon went straight to the room, while I went to the nurse's station. I said to the discharge nurse, "I need your help desperately. I need to slip this piece of paper into the discharge papers and have both of them sign their names on the dotted line. Could you do that for me?" 

"What is it?" 

"Nothing important, just a marriage license." 

"Are you out of your mind? I could get fired." 

"I'll buy you the hospital." 

"Could I have the cash instead?" 

"You can have it any way you want it, just get them to sign on the dotted line. I want my daughter to be happy. The only way those two are ever going to be happy is when they're married. You've never seen two people more terrified of being apart than those two." 

"It will cost you a dollar." 

"I'll give you $1000." 

"$1000 will make me feel cheap. Just one dollar please. Do you need anything else?" 

"It would be nice if we could do this in the chapel." 

"I think we can arrange that. Give me a few minutes." 

"Thank you, we will be in with my daughter." 

********** 

"Good morning you two; you looked very rested. Who sent you the nice flowers?" 

"Your attorney sent them, with a wonderful note about me sucking my thumb. Someone almost swallowed my fist." 

"Are we fighting already this morning? Is the wedding off again?" 

"The wedding is still on, as of now." 

"Young woman, people are going to be getting on airplanes in 10 days. It would be polite to let them know earlier than that if there is going to be a wedding or not. Is there or is there not going to be a wedding?" 

"Yes dad there's going to be a wedding." 

"Jennifer call the hotel and cancel everything. With an attitude like that they may not last six months. There is no sense in them getting married." 

"Gray you take care of your side of the family, give them my apologies. She's becoming too much of a brat for me to handle." 

"Dad, we are going to get married." 

"Why are you getting married?" 

"Because I love him, and he drives me crazy." 

"Why are you getting married Doctor Thyme?" 

"Because I am crazy, and I love her." 

Jennifer held my arm close to her chest and said, "I like his answer better than hers." 

Delicious said, "I told you yesterday Jennifer, I don't like you." 

"Remember that word you said yesterday, I'm not finished with you yet missy. I have two weeks to go. I'm going to have a ball; as a matter of fact last night I held two of them." 

"Dear stop talking like that in front of the children." 

The nurse walked in with the discharge papers and started reading them to Delicious. Page after page she had her sign where she pointed, and I kept talking to distract her. It went like clockwork. 

The nurse came to me and said, "You are taking your home right?" 

I looked at Delicious and Gray and said, "What are your living arrangements? Is she coming home with me, or is she living with you?" 

They stared at each other for a moment until Gray said, "She's living with me." 

The nurse walked over to him and read him the same litany of instructions. She had him sign each page next to her signature, and again my mouth was moving a mile a minute, drowning out the sounds of her words. As the nurse walked past me she smiled. 

Whether they knew it or not they were married. Only the 'words' remained to be said. 

Rod was at the nurse's station, where he notarized the license, had 10 copies made and put them in his briefcase. 

The subterfuge continued. 

An aide came into the room and told us to leave while she assisted Delicious in washing and getting dressed. While she was doing this she was explaining to her about this delightful elderly couple, who would be celebrating their 80th wedding anniversary today in the chapel. They would never leave the hospital because they were both so ill. The hospital was looking for volunteers, who could give 10 or 15 minutes of their time, to help photographers set up the lighting, and their cameras. The couple would be sitting in wheelchairs, instead of standing, and they were going to have a problem with shadows. The hospital staff was so busy they couldn't spare anyone. 

Delicious said she and her family would be willing to help for a short time. 

The aide was exuberant. "Really, could you really help us? That would be phenomenal. Could you meet us in the chapel in 20 minutes, I'll call everyone else that has to be there." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 13



Delicious agreed and the trap was set. 

****** 

(11:15 A.M.) The coordinator had Delicious sit in her wheelchair on the left, and Gray in his wheelchair on the right. The two photographers I hired were in their positions, complaining about lighting, and angles. I was holding Richard, when the nurse pulled me to my daughter's side. Then she pulled Jennifer to Gray's side. You would think for such bright people they would have noticed we were very well dressed for visiting a sick person, in a hospital. Gordon was standing in the V of the two wheelchairs in his cranberry colored shirt. 

Then a photographer asked, "Do we have anyone who might resemble a minister so we can check for his shadow?" 

On cue, Rod walked in dressed in his suit. 

The coordinator yelled, "You, come here, we need you for a few minutes." 

Rod said, "Who me?" 

"Yes you. We want you to play the part of a minister marrying these two people. We have an important wedding this afternoon, and we have to be sure everything goes perfectly." 

He looked at Delicious like a Great White Shark looks at a seal. "I finally have you where I want you, and you can't say a word until I stop." 

"I will rip your arms from your body, just for fun Rod." 

"I'm leaving." 

I said, "She will be good Rod. If she moves, I will hit her on her head." 

"Dad, you wouldn't do that to me." 

"Try me. Let's get this over with, my son is wet." 

"Okay, I'll be good." 

"I get to play Burt Reynolds' at last." 

"Rod knock it off." 

"Okay, here goes. Do you 'Crazy Woman with a cracked head and no hair, what was your name again..." 

"Delicious Luck." 

"That's right, Delicious Luck, tormentor of my life from the day we first met, want to marry this poor innocent good-looking man whose name is who..." 

"I'm going to kill you, and you know it." 

"That is a weird name for a man. So you want to marry a man whose name is 'I'm going to kill you, and you know it.' Okay that works for me.' 

"Doctor Grayson Thyme." 

"Doctor Grayson Thyme" for better or worse in sickness and in health till death do you part. How quickly can he kill you? Are you sick already? Did you say yes or no?" 

"Yes, I will marry him for better or worse in sickness and in health until I can grab you by the balls and squeeze until Roz begs me to stop or until they pop out of your sack." 

"All you present will acknowledge that the pain in my ass, Delicious Luck, just said yes to marry this poor man... What was your name again?" 

"Doctor Grayson Thyme." 

"Why the hell do you want to marry what's her name..." 

"Delicious Luck." 

That's right; my mind is so afraid of her, it blocks that name out. You are absolutely sure about this, you still have time to back out, but after you say you will marry her in sickness and in health to love and to cherish and all that bad stuff it's too late. You want to take a moment to think about this, do you want to take two moments to think about this, how about a year or ten?" 

"I am going to murder you Rod." 

"Be quiet, it's not your turn to talk." 

"Doctor, have you thought it over? Are you really sure? This is your last chance. Have you been medically cleared to make decisions of such enormous magnitude?" 

"Yes, I will marry her for the rest of my life, or until I kill her." 

"Who her?" 

"Delicious Luck; and if anyone is going to kill her it will be me." 

"That's the spirit. How soon can you kill her; can I watch?" 

"No you can't watch." 

"Dammit, therefore ladies and gentlemen gathered here today by the power vested in me by the State of Colorado, the County and City of Denver and the Town of Idaho Springs, I now pronounce you man and wife. You two are officially married. Congratulations you may kiss your bride." 

I yelled, "Rod run." 

Delicious screamed as she tried to get up, "I'll kill that sonofabitch." 

She looked up at me with fire in her eyes. "You did this to me?" 

"Do you think I'm that stupid?" 

Her head turned slowly to Jennifer. My wife had a grin on her face as wide as a Cheshire cats. 

"You said ANYTHING!" 

I asked, "Gray are you going to kiss your bride?" 

"Even as of midnight tonight she is 18. I'm going to do more than kiss her." 

"If you want I can get you the exact time of her birth." 

"If you do you'll be lying next to your sister." 

******** 

He pulled her out of her wheelchair onto his lap. Before he kissed her he looked at me and asked, "Who signed our marriage licenses?" 

I pulled the copy out of my pocket and handed it to him. I said, "You two did. You have to be more careful when you are checking out of hospitals." 

"Daddy, I'm married, but I'm not 18." 

"As your husband said, you will be at midnight. Can you go that long without fighting?" 

"We will think of something to do. Maybe I'll go out and buy a wig." 

"Look in your paperwork; they have the name of two stores you may want to try. I think you'd look scrumptious as a blonde." 

"Blonde, yuck, red maybe, but never a blonde. People will think him a ditz." 

"Remember, don't overdo it. You just had surgery, and you're lucky your brains didn't get scrambled." 

"Yes daddy, thank you for worrying about me." 

"Who said her brains didn't get scrambled?" 

"Do you see what I mean dad? I didn't say anything nasty to him, and he's looking for trouble already. If he keeps looking, I guarantee you he's going to find it." 

"Goodbye children, remember midnight is only 12 hours 27 minutes away. Try not to kill each other before then." 

"Goodbye dad." 

"Goodbye dad." 

"Goodbye son." 

Delicious leaned over and nibbled on to Gray's ear. "If you promise to be nice until midnight I'll tell you a secret." 

"Am I going to like this secret? Is this secret going to hurt me in the long run? Am I going to have to kill you over the secret? Does anyone else know about the secret?" 

"In order of your questions: Number 1, yes. Number 2, no. Number 3, no. Number 4, yes." 

"What were my questions again?" 

"Promise you'll be nice to me until midnight, and I will tell you my secret." 

"I know I'm going to hate myself for doing this, but I promise to be good until midnight." 

She whispered into his ear, "I stopped taking my birth control pills two months ago. I want your baby. I love you very much Gray. I will always love you. Whether we are together or apart, I will always love you." 

He kissed her so hard it felt like he was trying to stuff his head down her throat. 

"How do you expect me to be nice until midnight, when you say something like that to me. I adore you, I have since the moment I met you. I need a shower, a very cold very long shower." 

"Do you want company?" 

"Stay away from me you devil, or we will never make it until midnight." 

"Do you want to go to a movie, and fool around?" 

"Was there anything in particular you wanted to see?" 

"The girls at school were talking about a theater called the Roxy. It's running a new movie about cars. It's called, "Anal Parking." 

"You are so going to be spanked. Anal Parking has nothing to do with cars and you know it." 

"I was just saying what some of the girls at school were talking about. You know I have no practical knowledge of any form of sex. You know President Clinton said that blowjobs are not intercourse. It's just another form of talking." 

"Yes, and you've learned to speak that language so well this past year." 

"You know we shouldn't be speaking like this in the chapel. God may hear us." 

"We are getting married in front of HER in two weeks. I hope she doesn't mind we got a quick start." 

"That reminds me, I'm going to kill Rod." 

"You have to know someone put him up to this, and it wasn't your father." 

"It had to be Jennifer. I can't wait to find out what she did to make him do this. He's already been clipped, I can't imagine what else could have driven him over the edge." 

"I can, but let's not worry about that today. Are you hungry; or do you want to go wig shopping?" 

"Feed me first, you know how I get when I'm hungry." 

"You don't have to tell me twice." 

"You said you were going to be nice." 

"Delicious, if I ate like you do I would be 400 pounds. I'm jealous of you. I don't know where you put all that food and not gain an ounce." 

"It's in my genes." 

"I've noticed, and those jeans fit you mighty fine." 

"If you don't stop talking like that, I am not going to make it until midnight." 

"We could go back to the apartment and play until midnight." 

"We would go there with the best of intentions, and last about a minute before you impregnate me." 

"How far into your cycle are you?" 

"11 days, after midnight it will be 12 days." 

"Jennifer must be a witch. Did she know you stopped taking the pill?" 

"I never told anyone but my Doctor." 

"Does she use the same Doctor?" 

"Yes, Jennifer, Roz, and I all use him. He just saved Jennifer's life." 

"I will make you a wager someone in that office has a big mouth." 

"Are you going to feed me or not?" 

"There are many things I want to do to you, and feeding you is not on the top of my list. However it's not midnight, and we have to wait. What would you like for lunch?" 

Gordon said, "Wendy's." 

Gray turned around and looked at him. "What are you doing here?" 

"Everyone left in such a hurry they forgot about me." 

Gray laughed. "Somehow Gordon I don't believe they forgot about you. I think they left you with us as a babysitter." 

"Aren't you supposed to babysit me?" 

"No Gordon, not today. Today is a very special day, and your parents just pulled a fast one on us. Wendy's it is. How hungry are you?" 

"I'm very hungry. Can we go now?" 

"I think you've learned enough about sex today. We can eat now. Where is Montgomarie?" 

"She's standing in the hallway waiting for me." 

"Okay let's go." 

Delicious started to stand up and Gray said, "Sit." 

"Why?" 

"Hospital rules. A patient cannot get out of her wheelchair until she exits the hospital. You are still in the hospital you stay in that chair." 

"Are you starting already Gray?" 

He leaned over and kissed her, until she couldn't breathe. When he let her go he asked, "Does that answer your question." 

"Yes dear." 

Gordon tugged on Gray's belt. "Does kissing girls always keep them quiet?" 

"Not always Gordon, but it sure does help. Why are you having trouble with Danielle and Brandy?" 

"I'm not having trouble with them. They are having trouble with each other when I am around. I'm trying to figure out a way to stop it. If kissing works, I'll try it on both of them." 

Delicious nearly fell out of her wheelchair laughing. Gray was thankful he was holding on to the handles. 

"Gordon before you do that talk to your father first. He is a very smart man when it comes to matters of the heart." 

"Okay, I'll think about it." 

They walked out of the chapel, and their agents formed up around them. When they asked for the destination Gordon announced happily, "We are going to Wendy's." 

The agents couldn't help themselves; they all burst out in laughter. 

************* 

(12:45 P.M.) As they were preparing to leave the hospital grounds, an ambulance caused the last of the five protection vehicles to stop and let it pass. It also caused it to stop at the traffic light entering the main roadway. Sydney called the lead car to say she was out the position and she would catch up as soon as possible. 

As she was maneuvering to catch up, she watched a car maneuvering to stay behind the lead group. She pointed it out to the three men in the car with her. They ran the license plate, and the vehicle through the police computers, and they didn't match. 

Sydney called Jayden and said, "We have a tail." 

"How far back and how many?" 

"Three cars behind you, and I only see one. It may be a reconnaissance vehicle." 

"We are going to Wendy's. Sydney you continue on as if you're not part of our group. Contact control, and advise them of the situation. Get six people into Apartment 'A', and a dozen into Apartment 'B'." 

"Will do Jayden, I'll call you on your private cell." 

As the four cars turned into Wendy's parking lot, the black Buick did also. The agents played with Gordon, like they didn't have a care in the world. 

The two men in the Buick filmed everything, including Gray and Delicious hugging and kissing. 

Sydney continued straight ahead for a mile, turned into a gas station and filled up the SUV like any ordinary customer. When she was finished, she followed a route through a community to be sure she wasn't being followed. She waited five minutes, and drove a circuitous route that led her back to the shopping plaza obliquely across from the restaurant, and watched. She called Jayden to tell him her position. 

********** 

After sitting in Wendy's parking lot for 10 minutes, the two men took off their jackets and ties, and went into Wendy's, ostensibly to have lunch. Both of them were wearing sophisticated listening devices under their clothing. 

After they paid for their order, and filled their drinks, a table opened across the way from where Delicious and Logan were seated. The discussion didn't sound like employer employee conversation. It sounded more like a friendly discussion. 

Delicious said, "Why don't you guys stay in the lobby tonight. Better still, take the night off. I don't want you tape-recording my first night with my new husband. Knowing you, you'll have it on YouTube by noon." 

"Noon, it would never take me that long to get it up and running. I'm going to have a microphone on your door and on every window in the apartment. I'll be doing the play-by-play myself." 

"If I didn't know you better, I would believe you meant it." 

"I do mean it." 

"The next time I make you dinner, you won't be able to walk away from the table." 

"I wasn't able to walk away the last time, it was so good." 

"It will be so good this time, it will be deadly." 

"Okay, the four of us will take off. Just remember double lock the master electronic lock. Anyone who tries to get into the apartment will have to blow the door off its six tungsten steel hinges to gain entry." 

"Thank you daddy, how many times have you read me that lecture now?" 

"How many times have you forgotten to do it?" 

"I'm only 17 give me a break." 

"People intent on kidnapping you don't care if you're only 17. With a body like yours, some Arab would pay $1 million own it." 

"How about you? Would you like to play with my body?" 

"I'm immune to you, remember. I play for the other team." 

"If you give me a little time, I bet I could change your mind." 

"If Junie couldn't do it, you don't stand a chance." 

"She's that much prettier than I am?" 

"No, she's got a bigger ass." 

"I don't like you Logan." 

"Yes you do, otherwise you wouldn't want me so bad." 

"Gordon are you finish with your lunch?" 

"Can I have another 'Chocolate Frosty'?" 

"Are you going to throw it up all over the apartment tonight?" 

"Probably." 

"Okay, you can have a small one." 

Logan said, "You are so easy." 

"I've been trying to tell you that for a long time." 

"Why don't you try Jayden? He's got 14 inches or more." 

"No black man is ever going to touch me. I would kill him first." 

"Here I thought you were more open-minded." 

"Open-pussied, not Open-minded." 

"Sis, I'm ready to go." 

"That sleeping pill mom gave me for him better work. If he wakes up while Gray is fucking me, I'm not stopping. He will gain at advanced education in sex at a very early age." 

"Why don't you give him a ride. He will remember it for the rest of his life." 

"I've washed it, I wouldn't even feel it touching me yet." 

"Are you sure all you did was wash it?" 

"Well, I may have pulled it a few times but it didn't react." 

"Miss, you are bad girl." 

"It takes you a long time, but you finally get the right idea." 

As she got up from the table, Delicious faked slipping, and sat down on one of the spies laps. 

"Oh God, I'm so sorry sir. I guess I don't have my balance back completely yet. I fell the other day and fractured my skull as you can see by all these bandages. I apologize for being so clumsy." 

With his hand holding her tit, the man said, "Darling, you can fall into my lap anytime." 

Delicious put her arm around his head and said, "Do you see what I mean, this man knows how to treat a woman. He doesn't toss her away to play for the same team. Thank you for being so gallant sir. My name's Delicious, and I truly am Delicious." 

The man replied, "I could not agree with you anymore than I do." 

"I have to leave now, maybe some other time?" 

"It would be my pleasure ma'am." 

"I'll make sure it is." 

As they walked out of the restaurant Gray pulled her to his side and said, "What the fuck was that?" 

"I wanted to see if he was wearing a wire, and he was. Whoever he's working for wants to know exactly what we were talking about. Jayden do you want to tell my husband what's going on?" 

"With your wife's help, and with the knowledge they were taping our conversation, we had just laid a trap for them. They don't think anyone is going to be on guard duty tonight. Someone is going to be at your building soon to make sure you go in. They know they will have to bring explosives to get through your front door, because we told him they would need it. Most of them will come up the elevator, some of them may come up the stairs. When they get to the top, we will cut power to the elevators. We will have people on the 15th floor on both of the staircases. They will have no place to go, or move. They will have no way to escape." 

Gray stared at Delicious. "If this is part of your mother's 'Anything' game, I'm going to pull out her fingernails and toenails very slowly 

"May I borrow your cell phone please?" 

************ 

"Hello Gray, how are you holding up?" 

"Hello dad, it's Delicious, is mom there?" 

"Of course she is, she's buried in the back where the headstone is." 

"No dad, I meant Jennifer." 

"You're calling her mom now? Don't get me wrong I'm very happy about that, it makes me very proud that you've taken that step. I am as proud of you as I was when Gordon called me dad. Yes your mother is here. I'll get her." 

Delicious heard her father yell, "Jen, your daughter is on the phone." 

When she answered Jennifer said, "Are you going to kill us for leaving Gordon with you?" 

"We thought that was a really smooth move mom. There were certain things we would not have talked about if we knew he was behind us, but no you're not going to get killed for that. There is something else going on and if this is your doing, start digging. Are you having us followed and audiotaped by people other than our guards?" 

"Why the hell what I do something like that?" 

"That's what I'm asking you mom. We are being followed, but we don't know by who. Gray asked me the strangest question, and I couldn't answer it, without asking you. So this has nothing to do with the word ANYTHING!" 

"No dear, our deal is finished. You and I, and the word anything have completed our journey. You are a married woman, but more important you are happy. Whoever is following you is trying to make you unhappy. Stay by Gray's side, he will protect you. Listen to his counsel, he is smarter than you are in these situations. Above all do not get into an argument with him about this. Now is the time to allow him to think, and act, not react." 

"Thanks mom, I'll tell him." 

"Gray, my mom said she has nothing to do with this. She wants me to listen to you and to stay close to you. Most of all, she does not want me to argue with you. She wants you to be able to think and act, not react." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 14



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

***** 

56. No annulment now! 

Gray was lying in their marital bed, with a very self-satisfied smile on his face while Delicious' head lay in the crook of his arm. She had a warm, satisfied glow emanating from inside her. 

It was a huge relief and a great pleasure for both of them to get their first time together out of the way. It hurt like hell when he broke through her maidenhead, but she fully expected it, because he was so big. He may not be as big her father is, according to Jennifer, but Gray way plenty big for her. 

She decided to wipe that silly grin off his face. He said he wanted her to stay the way she always was, so the little devil inside her decided to test his resolve. 

"Gray was that all there is to making love?" 

The smile vanished from his face immediately. He opened his eyes wide, and there was an edge on his voice. "What did you just say?" 

"I asked if that was all there was to having sex. I found it a little, ah, disappointing." 

He moved so quickly from his back to his side, her head flipped into the air, and bounced when it hit the bed. 

"You found it disappointing? What was all that screaming about? Why do I have scratch marks all over my arms, and probably my back? Why were you screaming 'More, More, More', if you weren't enjoying it?" 

"I wanted more; because I was hoping I would end up enjoying it." 

He was about to say something to her, when he noticed a little twitch in the corner of her mouth. He caught on to her little game, and put his nose against hers, looked into her eyes, and said to his wife, "I believe you are going to need your left foot my dear. You just lied to me, didn't you?" 

She buried her face into the mattress and laughed. 

He pushed her onto her back and kissed her. "Oh no Mrs. Thyme; there is no hiding from your husband in bed." 

"You were lying there, so smug, with this 'I'm so great' smile on your face, I decided to ground you. I wanted to remind you who you married. It wasn't a lie, it was all in fun." 

He kissed her, slid his fingers over her belly, through her sparse pubic hair, over her little warrior, and into her recently the deflowered vagina. 

Her hips rose up to greet him, as he played with the mixture of his semen, her fluids, and blood. He still could not believe how much she bled when he pierced through her virginity. 

"Well Doctor Thyme, what do you think; is there enough of your cocktail in there to impregnate me?" 

"I'm sorry to say there isn't. We will have to do this over and over again, until you are so full, I might have to hang you from the ceiling to keep it all inside you. It may take us all night, and well into the morning hours, but we will get there." 

"Oh, isn't that a shame. Do you have one of those little blue pills to help you stay erect, or will you be able to handle it on your own?" 

"I do not have, or need, one of those little blue pills. If I can't handle it on my own, I have someone that can help me rise to the occasion." 

"I'm sorry Doctor; my head is out of order." 

"I told you there are many things you have to learn about lovemaking. All you will have to do is lie on your back; open your mouth, and suck, while I do push-ups forcing my dick into your throat." 

"I don't think I'm going to like that position." 

"Give it time, and you will love it. I know I will." 

"You will love Anal Parking also." 

"We both will, or we won't do it again. We are partners remember?" 

"I also remember you are the senior partner." 

"It was all in fun Mrs. Thyme. I love how those words flow from my mouth." 

"I can hear what my friends are going to say to me." 

"Tell me, what they are going to say." 

"Let's eat Delicious Thyme, I'm hungry." 

"They may say it, but if they try to do it I fully expect Logan will handle them appropriately." 

"They will only say it in fun dear husband. Don't get your hackles up. Are we getting very possessive already?" 

"You bet your luscious little bottom I am. No one plays with what is mine. That stunt you pulled in Wendy's nearly set me off." 

"You know I only love you. I never thought I would marry. I didn't wait 10 months like you did. I had to adjust my whole way of thinking about men. I found a very special man, but he was a man just the same. My dad and I discussed this repeatedly. I told him this would never happen to me. He warned me that one-day love would jump up and bite me in the ass, and there would be nothing I could do about it. I never expected it would happen to me. I'm happy it did, and I'm overjoyed that it was with you." 

"Would you turn over for a second please?" 

"Why, is there something wrong?" 

"No, I just want to check the back of your bandage." 

Delicious turned onto her stomach, and watched suspiciously as Gray's upper body moved over hers. He stayed still for a moment, then suddenly moved down and bit her ass. 

She screamed in pain and laughed. "I knew I shouldn't have trusted you." 

"That was your love biting your ass." 

"Turnabout is fair play, turn over so I can bite yours." 

He did, and she did. 

"You bitch; you bit me harder than I bit you." 

"You have more muscle back there than I do. I wanted to make sure you felt it." 

"It's moments like these I want to spank you, but I'm not going to because you don't deserve it. It's a tendency I am going to have to learn to control." 

"I am going to have to keep you away from our children. You could be arrested for child abuse." 

"That will never happen, I am going to love our children the way I love Gordon." 

Delicious giggled. 

"What was that for?" 

"I expected him to answer." 

"I would have died laughing." 

"Someone said a short time ago; we were going to have to make love, over and over again, to make sure I was pregnant. All we've been doing is talking. In all the journals I've read, talking does not get a woman pregnant. Are you ready to perform your duty Doctor?" 

"We have been talking for approximately three minutes, and you are complaining already. Have I created a monster? Am I ever going to be able to satisfy you? Have I turned the devil with the vicious mouth, into a vicious devil with a voracious appetite for sex?" 

"Yes." 

"Oh lucky me! Stay the way you are, I'm going to take you from behind this time." 

Delicious twisted on to her side. "You said you weren't going to do Anal Parking for a long time down the road. Did you change your mind?" 

"Delicious, you truly are precious. First, I can't get you pregnant that way. Second, there is a lot of preparation that has to take place before I can take you anally. Third, you are not ready for that type of sex yet. When we are going to have anal sex, it will be by mutual agreement. It will not be by surprise. Relax; I'm going to make love to you from behind. Trust your husband; you will enjoy it." 

"You are one of the very few men I trust. Back there, you are the only man I trust." 

"Don't freeze up on me now, I promise you this will be very enjoyable." 

Gray pulled a pillow from his side of the bed, picked up her hips, and slid it under her tummy. He did this to her many times during the past 10 months, as they played their 'non-intercourse' games, and she was able to relax. Delicious felt the stubble on his chin as he worked his way up her delicate thighs, and knew he was going to be pleasuring her very soon. 

His target turned out to be different this time. 

"Holy Shit!" 

"Not right now please." 

He tried not to grin at her reaction as he played with her crinkly protrusion for a few moments, and then moved down towards her waiting pussy. It was dribbling out all sorts of fluids. It didn't bother him one bit, because it was their personal cocktail. He knew, after all their time together, they were both safe. She was as safe as the day she was born, and his last assignation was well over 13 months ago, with a college beauty, whose name he could not remember. 

When he stopped torturing her, and his tongue entered her vagina, her systems went into overload. She screamed his name; and her mind and body exploded as one. 

He could not see the bolts of lightning, and the short-circuiting of the neurons in her brain, but he could feel, see, taste, and touch the awesome variety of fluids flowing from her body. 

Before she was able to recover fully, he raised her hips, and entered her body as deeply as he could. 

Delicious was still in a haze, but her eyes popped open as she felt him pass her cervix and enter her uterus. 

"Gray stop; do you know where you are?" 

"Yes, I'm in Denver Colorado." 

"This is not the time to joke with me. Do you know where you are?" 

"Yes, I took anatomy in high school." 

"Gray do you want to become a eunuch?" 

"Absolutely not, I am about 2 inches past your cervix at the entrance to your womb. Is that what you wanted to know?" 

"Yes that was about it. How come it didn't go that deep the other way?" 

"Can we discuss the biological formations of the human female body later? I have other things on my mind at this moment." 

"Yes, but if that thing comes out of my throat, I will bite it off." 

He continued pushing deep into her, while she pulled a pillow under her head to protect it from the ring on her finger. She felt Gray move slightly out of her uterus, and past her cervix. Then he plunged back in. Every time he did, she saw sparks fly by her eyes. She loved this new feeling, and him. 

He tried to find a comfortable rhythm, and waited for her to join him. He moved his hand to her clit and played with it until she moaned. 

"At least I know you're not sleeping." 

"Sleeping hell, this is phenomenal." 

"If it's so good why aren't you joining me?" 

"I didn't know I was supposed to join you." 

"Do you feel like you want to join me?" 

"I was having trouble staying still." 

"Baby, always listen to your body. If it says move, move. If it says stay still, stay still. If it says, I want to be on top, push me over and climb on top. There are no rules while we are making love. There is only enjoyment." 

"You may live to regret those words." 

"Never in 1 million years dear." 

"How about 1 million light years." 

"Can we stop talking shop; I'm trying to get you pregnant." 

"Okay, you may continue." 

"I want to spank you right now." 

"Go ahead, I deserve that one." 

"No, I will save it for another time." 

His strokes were short, just outside her cervix, and then into her uterus, over and over again. The difference was she joined his movements, and the pounding was fiercer. Her smooth flesh rolled on her bottom like waves rolling on the open sea. His left hand tormented the nipples of her breasts. His right hand busily played with her clit. 

Her pussy was lubricating his dick like a commercial product, with enough left over to drip out of her and onto their bed. He was perspiring like a professional athlete in training. Now she was pounding back at him, and he was stroking as deeply into her as he could go. Neither one of them would give in to the other. 

Gray could hold back no longer. He yelled, "I'm cuming!" 

"I don't care if you cum, just don't stop moving inside me; I'm not ready yet." 

Gray shot several huge loads of his activated swimmers deep inside her uterus seeking the egg that would produce their first child. As with every man he was exhausted and was ready to lean over and rest. 

"Don't stop you prick; don't you dare stop." 

It took everything; more than everything he had to kneel up straight and piston his hips forward and back to satisfy his sex-hungry wife. It took a while for his penis to return to rigidity but it eventually did. 

She moaned gratefully. 

Time passed; he wasn't sure how long, but he finally heard her scream the exuberant scream that meant she had passed over the mountaintop, and was finally sated. 

Amazingly, his eyes crossed, and he exploded deep inside her again. He rolled over onto his back, wanting badly to fall asleep. It was not to be. 

Delicious crawled onto his body. 

"Can we do that again, please? That was phenomenal. You were phenomenal Gray. Is sex always that good? I could go without food, live on a diet of sex like that, and water for the rest of my life. Who taught you how to do it like that? Did you read it in a book? Did you learn it from another woman? If you did, I'm not angry. I just would like to thank her, because it was beyond amazing." 

"Delicious, you're going to kill me. Keep quiet and go to sleep please. If you don't, I will be forced to tie you up, and gag you, so I can go to sleep before I die." 

"Doctor Grayson Thyme, open your eyes and look at me. This is your wife talking." 

Grudgingly, he opened one eye. Finally, he managed to open both of them. After he was able to focus on her he said, "What do you want Delicious?" 

"I just wanted to say one thing to you before you nod off for the rest of the night, which leaves you seven orgasms short of where you said you would be by morning." 

She kissed him, and said, "Wimp!" 

She jumped out of the bed, stood by their bedroom door. She watched as he processed the information through the fog of his mind. 

Gray's eyes went from slits to wide open. "WIMP! You called me a wimp." 

"I told you two infants in a sandbox could play you. I must admit I did have a great time cuming and cuming again, until the last one really blasted my head off. You were really awesome Gray." 

"Little girl, do you remember that spank I owe you. You're going to get it, and it is going to be a beauty. Prepare yourself, retribution is coming." 

"Gray, you are so tired you can't keep your eyes open. You need sleep desperately. How could you possibly chase after an accomplished runner, at this time of the night, when she is wide-awake and you are completely out of energy? You poor thing, you don't stand a chance in hell." 

"Do you want to bet on that little girl?" 

"$100 

"$100 it is. 

He lunged out of bed towards her, but she skillfully took a step backwards and closed the door. He slammed into it head first. 

"Ouch!" 

"Aw baby did that hurt? I bet it did. I know when I hit my head it hurt. Are you bleeding? Do you have to go to the hospital? Should I call an ambulance? Do you need my help scraping you up off the floor? Are you sleeping?" 

"Delicious that was not funny. I could have poked my eye out on the hangers." 

"Dear where has your sense of humor gone?" 

He opened the bedroom door, looked both ways for a trap she might have set for him. 

"My sense of humor is in my right hand, which is waiting to meet your ass. Where are you hiding dear? You can't stay away from me forever." 

"You are correct. I can't stay away from you forever. I can cut you off from sex. As you told me, men pray for sex every night in the hopes of getting some. You will become one of them starting tonight." 

"I want a divorce." 

"I don't. I want to torment you like your mother did for the first 23 years of your life. I want it to be like a rerun of those years. I want you to fear everything I say and do." 

"I thought you said our arguing would end once we got married." 

"We are not arguing. There is no yelling or screaming going on is there? We're just stating facts. Now, are you going to sleep, or are we going to make love again and again and again?" 

"Are you sure you're not Jimmy Hoffa in disguise. I've never negotiated with anyone like you." 

"Jimmy Hoffa used muscle to get the Teamsters what they wanted. I only want Doctor Grayson Thyme and I will use my brain to keep him." 

"I give up. I accept defeat. Come to me, and I will fuck you until I'm dead." 

Delicious skipped around the kitchen counter, and jumped into Gray's arms, nearly knocking him over. 

"That's the spirit my husband; keep banging away, until you can't bang any more. Then we will call in the second team." 

"What second team?" 

"I don't know? My husband hasn't failed me yet." 

"I swear I'm going to kill you, just before I die." 

"Is that a nice thing to say to your faithful wife?" 

"It's amazing what that one piece of paper has done to you. You have gone from antagonistic, and angry, to perceptive and persuasive. I couldn't deal with the other Delicious. Now I have to find out if I can deal with this one." 

"Gray, you don't have to deal with this one. You just have to love this one like you always have; and we will never fight again like you told Gordon." 

"We haven't made love on the couch yet." 

"You could save all that energy walking back into the bedroom, by taking three steps to the right and laying down on the couch. I could be on top, and you could sleep, while I did all the work. How does that sound to you?" 

"I could live with that." 

"Come on sleepyhead, it's almost 3 AM and you have to inject me with all the stored up sperm you have inside. When I am full, you can hang me upside down from the ceiling." 

"I didn't buy the hooks." 

"Improvise." 

"I love you Delicious, I always will." 

"I know." 

"Where is he that's Gordon's answer?" 

"I know." 

"Stop that or I will spank you." 

"Only once Gray, twice and I will bite you dick off." 

"I will make it count baby." 

"Are you going to lie down on the couch or not?" 

"We could ruin it." 

"I'll get a towel." 

"You'd better get three with the way you're leaking." 

"Do you want to fuck me while I'm doing a handstand?" 

"As I picture that in my mind, it looks like more fun than hanging you from the ceiling. However, I cannot perform that at this moment. My legs would give out, and I would kill us both. The coroner would have a very difficult time describing the scene and cause of death, because we would both have smiles on our faces a mile wide." 

Delicious ran into the second bathroom and returned with a stack of towels. She placed them neatly over the center of the couch, looked at him, and said, "Do you have any more reservations about fucking me on the couch?" 

"As I recall, I am not fucking you on the couch, you are fucking me. I am looking forward to the experience." 

"If you are looking forward to it, why are you just standing there like a bump on a log.?" 

"I was waiting for instructions." 

She smiled, led him to the back of the couch, and pushed him over it. 

Gray screamed as he tumbled over the high backed couch, landed on the cushions, slid off, and landed on the floor, with an 'Oh Crap!' 

Delicious stared down at him. "Did you miss the landing zone dear?" 

"You goddamn know I did." 

"Should I kiss it and make it better?" 

"Don't you touch me until I am on the couch. Then you know what to do, and if you try to trick me again, I will take you over my knee and leave a handprint that will not leave your ass for a month." 

"Would I do that to you my dearest husband?" 

"Don't make me answer that, you will be very disappointed with my answer." 

"You are going to make me cry on my wedding night." 

"I guarantee you that you will cry on your wedding night, if I have to spank you." 

"Do you want to do it now and get it over with?" 

"No, I can wait." 

"You bastard, I will get even with you for that. You are doing this to keep me on my toes like the Sword of Damocles. You never want me to know when you're going to do it." 

"Isn't life grand? Why are you back there, and I am over here lying down?" 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 14



"I've decided I'm tired, and I'm going to sleep." 

"Do you have another foot that I don't know about?" 

"I never used my left foot remember. It was a joke. We both laughed at it." 

"I don't remember it that way." 

"When was the next time you expected to get laid?" 

"Now, and on the couch." 

"Incorrect answer. In a very long time, and when it's snowing in hell. Good night Grayson, it was fun while it lasted." 

"Get back here this instant. You still have your left foot, and if need be I'll give you my left foot." 

She didn't answer him. He heard their bedroom door close and lock. 

"I want to spank you so badly." 

He got up off the couch and strode towards their bedroom. 

"Delicious, sweetheart, are you dead? If this door stays locked between us, you are going to be. Open the door please; I don't want to have to break it down." 

Delicious did not answer him again. 

He shouted, "Delicious, open this door now." 

She snuck out of the second bedroom, and lay down on the floor a few feet from him. 

"This is your last chance, open the door or I am going to break it down." 

Again he received no reply. 

"That's it; I'm going to knock it down. Stand back." 

He stepped back, charged the door with everything he had, hit it with his shoulder, but the door did not move. He did it again, with as much force as he could muster. This time, he hurt his shoulder. He slithered to the ground in pain. 

With his back resting against the door, rubbing his sore aching shoulder, she said, "Would you like me to do that?" 

His head whipped around and saw her lying on the floor. He was confused. Silently, he pointed to her, then to their bedroom, and then back at her. 

"How did you get out of the bedroom?" 

"Magic." 

"Delicious, I am in enough pain right now to be angry with you. Don't add to that anger and make me spank you." 

"You are going to treat me like an adult remember?" 

"I will keep my word." 

"Is that a sometimes promise or in all the time promise?" 

"As far as spanking you is concerned, it is in all the time promise. How did you get out of our bedroom?" 

"I never went in. Did you check the door handle?" 

He closed his eyes and thought he couldn't possibly be that stupid. Please God, don't make me look that stupid, I will never live it down. 

He struggled to get up, because his left shoulder was causing him a great deal of pain. Once he was straight, he reached out his right hand grasped the handle, depressed the mechanism, and the door opened. 

He pressed his head against the doorjamb, closed his eyes, and said, "I heard you lock this door." 

"No you hurt me lock the door to the second bedroom, which I immediately unlocked. The second thing you forgot was that our security team replaced all the doors. Like the front door, in order to get through them, you would have to use axes or explosives to do it. Should I take you to the hospital to see if you broke your shoulder?" 

"No, the only thing that's broken is my pride. You outsmarted me again, you little devil. Come over here and kiss me. I can't imagine if we have a baby girl, what she is going to be like." 

"Of course you can Gray. She is going to be just like her mother. The only difference being she is going to love to play with trains, like her father." 

"The trains will probably levitate over the tracks instead of touching them." 

"Tracks, what tracks, the trains will go wherever they want, whenever they want to go there." 

"You haven't kissed me yet." 

"Are you going to spank me now?" 

"No, I think we are even after this last episode, don't you?" 

"In that case, you sex suspension has been removed. You can have me whenever you want me. I know you're too tired to do it now so let's go to sleep." 

"You owe me one." 

"How do you figure that Mister Thyme?" 

"You owe me a woman on top. The couch is already prepared. Are you reneging?" 

"No, I am wide-awake. I know you are exhausted, and now you have a shoulder that may or may not be broken. I didn't want to cause you any more pain." 

"Delicious, you are so full of shit." 

"There is only one way to find out, let's go to the couch, and see if you can stay awake." 

*********** 

57. The Wedding after the Wedding 

"Sarge pick up the phone, it's someone by the name Jayden. He says you know him." 

"Tell him I moved to Sweden for sex change operation." 

"He said they wouldn't take you, because your balls are too big." 

"Jayden if you are up to your neck in trouble again I'm going to put you in isolation for the rest of your life." 

"Why Sergeant Fowler I just called pass the time of day. Do you think I only call you when I am in trouble or saving the law enforcement agencies time and effort in trying to recapture criminals after they do their dastardly deeds?" 

"Hang on a second Jayden; I'm looking for my shovel. What can I do for you this time?" 

"Doctor Luck's daughter is getting married a week from Saturday. About 3000 well-heeled guests will be here starting Thursday afternoon, and leaving sometime Sunday or Monday morning. Do you know anyone in the police department that would like to make some extra money over those four days at the same rate of pay as the last time?" 

"How many do you want?" 

"On the soft side, 600, on the top side 900." 

"Who the fuck is coming the president?" 

"No, he wasn't invited. These people are more important than the president. He can be replaced. They can't. It will be easier this time for you to identify our guests. Instead of having to identify all the police officers involved, each guest will receive a token of some kind. They will have to wear it, to the church and to the events afterwards, to gain admission. You will be our point man, and everything will work through you. If they don't make you a Lieutenant after this, Doctor Luck is going to want to know why. He may even make you Police Commissioner." 

"The Police Commissioner is a mayoral appointment. Our mayor is unbeatable." 

"Would you dance naked at the police ball if you're wrong?" 

"Oh no, you know something I don't know. I'm not going there." 

"Could you run a police department?" 

"A two-headed donkey could run a police department. The only thing that gets in the way of running this department is the politicians." 

"Sergeant Dan Fowler, if I were you I would start studying. You have friends in very high places, and your career is about to take a very large jump." 

"I have two suits to my name, both of them are black." 

"That's funny, so am I. Let me know how many people I can expect by a week from Tuesday please." 

"Why do I have a feeling I should've let that guy in the jewelry store shoot you?" 

"Sergeant where would your life be without me?" 

"Simpler, much simpler than it was before I met you." 

"Goodbye Dan." 

"Goodbye Jayden." 

*********** 

Both general aviation sections of the Denver airports were so crowded the aircraft were spaced less than one foot between wingtips. Each aircraft was tied down and blocked to keep it from moving a fraction of an inch. These were not tinker toys, these aircraft cost between $50 and $100 million each. Not even when it hosted the Super Bowl did Denver have this many high-powered people here for a single event. 

The Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception was capable of holding 3000 people, and that Saturday afternoon not one seat or standing position was left unfilled. All of the investors in my project were given front row seats. They were informed that it was going to be an event they would never forget. This wedding would be the first of its kind. 

The Cathedral's bells rang precisely at 2 PM, and the organist began to play. The bridesmaids and groomsmen walked down the aisle and took their positions. Gray elected a friend from NASA to be his best man. He warned him not to faint at what he was about to see. 

Gordon was the ring bearer, and he came into view at the rear of the church. He stepped into a clear plastic cylinder, with a 4-inch black bottom. Montgomarie put his helmet on, tapped his head, gave him a thumb up, and backed away. 

Gordon lifted two control handles, and the tiny machine lifted off the ground silently. 

That was the only thing silent in the Cathedral. There were gasps, and words passed between people. Other people asked where the cables that were holding him up were. 

Gordon answered that question very quickly as he started maneuvering his little airborne cart all around the church, doing figure eights, letters, and for his final maneuver he landed the craft in the front of William Zabo Junior. 

"Your dad would kill me if I told you to take it for a ride now. We have one for you, and all the other investor's children to take home with you when you leave." 

Young William leaned over the rail, looked at his father and said, "Dad, I won't need that motorcycle we talked about. This looks like more fun." 

"When I get my hands on Even, I'm going to break his neck." 

Jemma replied, "Why, because he's given Junior something safer than a motorcycle, or you because you finally got me pregnant again, because he told you to?" 

"What did you just say?" 

"Why do you always go stone deaf when I am talking to you?" 

"Way to go grandpa, you did it again!" 

"No comments from the peanut gallery; I don't need your opinion right now. Are you sure?" 

"Doctor Stephanopoulos is sure. The little blue test strip is sure, and in a little more than seven months you're going to be changing diapers again." 

"Shit, exactly what I need to do as I turned 65 years old." 

Patti asked, "Dad what are you going to be doing when you hit retirement age?" 

Jemma answered for him. "Patti, your dad is going to be changing diapers again." 

"You dirty old man. At this rate your next child will be born when you're 80." 

"Don't you even joke about that Patricia, my heart will give out." 

Laura said, "You don't have to worry about that grandpa, after your next son is born, we will put you in stasis until you are 79. We will let you out of stasis for enough time to get Jemma pregnant again, and then we will put you back in." 

"I won't be pregnancy material by then," Jemma said. "I'll be 49 years old, and my baby factory will have closed down." 

"That's no problem; we will put you in stasis next to grandpa. We will keep both of you forever young." 

William smiled, "Now there's an idea I could get used to very quickly." 

*********** 

The organist began to play; Gray and Brian walked out from the side vestibule and took their positions, as the bridesmaids, and the groomsmen took their positions. When everyone was in position the great doors at the rear of the Cathedral opened, and Wagner's wedding march began. 

I kissed my daughter, lowered her veil, and began walking her down the aisle to meet her husband. Her gown was so white it almost seemed light blue. When we reached the front, I gave Delicious' hand to Grayson and made them both laugh. 

"LIVE LONG AND PROSPER." 

I must have practiced that line for hours trying not to crack up while I was saying it into a mirror. Leonard Nimoy would be very proud of me, because it came out perfectly. It had the exact result I wanted it to have. It broke the tension of the moment. 

The Cardinal came out from the sacristy, stood before the couple and in 20 minutes the rights of marriage were completed. The nearly 3000 guests stood up and applauded the new Mister and Mrs. Grayson Thyme as they kissed chastely by the altar of God Herself. 

The Cardinal would have had an epileptic fit if he knew what they were thinking. 

He did thank me however, for the $1 million check for the use of the facility for two hours. 

*********** 

Then it was party time. Not everyone who was invited to the wedding was invited to the party afterwards. I had a second party at another venue held to accommodate them. 

Jennifer and I sat with my benefactors, and William was ridden hard about Jemma being pregnant. 

"I know I told you Jemma had to have more children with the amount of patents that were going to come your way William, but you didn't have to take me seriously." 

"I should be angry with you Even, but I can't. Jemma is the light of my life, and if she is happy, I am overjoyed by her happiness. However, do you realize what you did today in front of all your guests? You put the world on notice that you have broken the laws of gravity. Sir Isaac Newton was wrong and you are right. People from around the world are going to be knocking at your door to find out why and how you did it." 

"All of you know what happened at my daughter's residence 10 days ago. Someone wants it that information badly enough to try to kidnap her. How do they know it's her? I was at home and they didn't come after me. They tailed her from the hospital, all the way to her home. They recorded her conversation at lunch and believed she would be unguarded during the evening. Who let the cat out of the bag? I know damn well it wasn't you William. That leaves only one other person. I think someone has to go to the University of Chicago and have a talk with a scientist. Do you want to do it William; or should I have my people do it?" 

"Let me take care of it Even. I have someone I trust who will get us the information we need." 

******** 

Everyone was having a good time at the party, especially Delicious' guests from school. They had never been at an affair so elegant. They were here with their boyfriends. They had hotel rooms for the night, which meant fun would go on and on with their parents blessings. 

During a brief pause in the festivities, a strikingly elegant young woman approached Delicious, and introduced herself. 

"Congratulations Mrs. Thyme, my name is Junie Penick. I assume Gray has told you all about me." 

Unsure how to answer, she kept it brief, "Yes he has Miss Penick." 

"May I have a moment of your time? If you don't, it's okay, I'll understand." 

"It's a party sit down, let's have a drink. What would you like?" 

"Sparkling water please." 

"You don't have to impress me; Gray tells me you can outdrink a battalion of men." 

"It's a well-groomed image. I never drink, I never have. If I touch liquor I throw up. I have a medical condition called, "Alcohol Intolerance." It's a genetic disorder because my body cannot metabolize the grains they use to make liquor. 

I'm not here to talk about me. I want to thank you for taking Gray off the market. His mother and my father were determined to have us marry for the sake of a railroad empire. My father was going to drive thousands of small companies out of business by raising prices beyond their ability to pay. B&O is the only game in town in the east, and he knew it. It is the single most profitable transportation system, and with dozens of his corporate buddies they were going to make moves that would have consolidated businesses into the hands of large corporations, and made small businesses obsolete along our railroad corridors. Tens of thousands of people would have lost their jobs, or businesses, because of my father's greed. You want to how I know this; I was taught at my father's knee. 

On the day of my 13th birthday, I was in my prettiest dress, when he pulled me into his room and raped me. My mother was dead and he told me I was to be the woman of the house. I was to take care of his needs at all times. I was to do as I was told, and never say a word. He would beat the shit out of me, if I didn't comply. When I complained, he did as he promised. I have tooth implants, and X-rays of a fractured jaw that can prove it. 

Gray was two years ahead of me at Penn. He was the Golden Boy and everyone knew it. There wasn't a co-ed there who wouldn't have dropped their panties for him. I was one of them, but I didn't dare. I am watched night and day by my father's goons. I am sure you know I have a reputation that I slept with everyone and anyone at Penn; probably a few horses and sheep also. The only person I have ever had sex with is my father. I'm 21 years old and I am his personal whore." A single tear began to drip from her left eye. 

"Where is your father now?" 

"He is with Gray, Mister Thyme, and Mister Zabo." 

"Are any of your guards here with you?" 

"Just two of them, but I don't know where they are right now." 

"I'm going to ask you this one time: did you just tell me the truth?" 

"I am so happy you married Gray to get him out of my father's clutches. Yes I have told you the truth." 

"Would you like to disappear and start your life over again?" 

"No one can do that." 

"I'm asking you if you want to start your life over again." 

"I would do ANYTHING to be able to do that. I would strip the skin off my body to do that. But I have guards around me night and day, and I am never left alone for one second." 

Gray noticed that Junie was talking with Delicious and didn't like it. He broke off his conversation and went to see what was going on. 

When he arrived at the dais Delicious was on her cell phone. 

"Junie leave my wife alone." 

Junie was frightened and began to stand. Delicious grabbed her hand, and made her stay. 

"Sit down Gray." 

Delicious continued her conversation "...that's right, police cars in front and in back, and one of our armored cars in the middle. If anyone tries to trail them cut them off. Take her to my father's place for now. We'll figure the rest of it out on the fly. How long will it be before we are assembled? Three minutes, we are on our way." 

"Keep quiet Gray, we are going for a walk. Junie you are in the middle. Take Gray's arm, smile, and make like nothing's happening. We are going to see if your two goons show up. Then the police will help them disappear." 

As they walked towards the exit of the hotel, Junie pointed out her two guards, as soon as they walked to intercept her. 

"Are you going someplace Miss Penick?" 

"I'm just walking with the bride and groom. Is that a problem?" 

"Your father does not want you to leave the ballroom area." 

Delicious said, "If the bride and groom can leave the ballroom area, why can't one of our invited guests?" 

"Her father wants her within his sight at all times." 

"Why would her father want that unless he was holding her against her will?" 

She just finished asking the question, when four Denver police officers made their presence known. 

They pressed Tasers against the men's neck. "Sirs, if you move you will be shocked. Take her to the car; these two are under arrest for participating in an ongoing crime of rape and white slavery." 

Junie screamed at the two men. "Tell my father he will never rape me again." 

Gray was somewhat confused but pulled Junie away from the scene, and towards the front door of the hotel. Tawny and Sydney were waiting for her by the armored car. The door was open and they hurried her in. She looked back, kissed Delicious, and thanked both of them. 15 seconds later the three units were gone. 

Gray asked Delicious, "I'm sure you going to tell me what just happened." 

She put her arm through his, and rested her head on his shoulder. "When we need something to fill in a boring day, remind me about today, and I'll tell you all about it." 

He pulled her to his chest, kissed her, and growled into her ear, "Oh I want to spank you so badly right now." 

"I'm feeling frisky. Maybe if you ask me politely, I will say yes." 

"Don't get my hopes up; my hand might fall off from the anticipation." 

"I have a few words I want to say to Cyrus Penick before he leaves. Does he know about you and your father owning 51% of the railroad?" 

"I don't know if my father told him yet. Delicious, what are you going to do?" 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 14



"I'm going to deck him for raping a 13-year-old girl." 

"Oh fuck, let me do it. I believed all the lies they told about her. Am I right?" 

"As she told me earlier, you were the Golden Boy at Penn." 

They walked into the ballroom, where they found their fathers still in deep conversation with William Zabo and Cyrus Penick. Gray asked everyone to step back. 

He looked Cyrus Penick in the eye. "This is for the 13-year-old girl you raped, and held hostage all these years; your daughter Junie." 

The blow was vicious. Cyrus Penick was unconscious before he hit the floor. 

I said, "Call for an ambulance, he's going to need one." 

"Gray, how sure are you of that accusation." 

"Delicious has all the details, and Junie is going to be at your house, under guard. His guards didn't want her to leave the ballroom; because they were afraid she might escape and tell anyone who would listen to what she had to say about the nightmare she is living. I think they may be excellent witnesses against him if the district attorney offers them a deal." 

"Let's hope so, because that was the best straight right hand I've ever seen." 

"He's has a better one than that dad. I've seen it, and I felt it." 

"Don't you start with me Mrs. Thyme; frisky or not I still owe you one." 

"You see dad, it doesn't take much to get him going." 

"Listen you two; I have been keeping Jennifer away from you for two weeks. If you don't want your entire sex life in the newspapers tomorrow, I would advise you to continue staying away from her. She is desperate to find out what happened on your wedding night. She can't figure out why she can't get through to your house phone or cell phones. When she finds out I have 'call block' on your numbers she will kill me. 

I will have Rod take care of Junie's legal problems. If that bastard did what she told you, he will be spending the rest of his life in jail." 

"Your aircraft is ready to go. Enjoy your honeymoon, and we will see you in three weeks." 

"Little one, you will be going back to school for the fall semester and studying with Hank on your electrical drawings. Learn quickly, we are going to be moving ahead much faster than we planned. I'm thinking seven years instead of 10." 

"Gray this will put you five weeks behind schedule. When you get back, you better be ready to work your ass off so you can catch up with the rest of us. It would be a shame if I put Gordon in the second chair and moved you to third, wouldn't it?"  

"I hate you Even. What if I sent Delicious on our honeymoon alone?" 

"Ouch! God dammit Delicious, I was only joking." 

Gordon said, "I thought you two were not allowed to argue anymore?" 

"We are not arguing Gordon, I was just making sure Gray was on the same page I was." 

"Is that why you nearly broke his knee?" 

"I was just getting his attention." 

"Adults are very hard to understand." 

"Son, if you think adults are hard to understand, try to make sense of teenagers. They are not young enough to be called children, and they are not old enough to be called adults. However, they think like children, but they believe they know more than the adults. It is a very difficult time in their life, but it is more difficult for their parents, because they are not sure how to treat them." 

"Is it like what I heard Gray say about women? ' You can't live without them, and you can kill them all." 

Gray ran for his life, with Delicious a few short yards behind him screaming expletives. 

"Gordon, I think we should brush up on the rules about saying certain things in front of women." 

"Did I say something wrong dad?" 

"This time Gordon, I can say without a shadow of a doubt, yes you did." 

"I'm sorry, but I was just repeating what Gray said." 

"I know." 

********** 

The elevator door opened and Gray charged in. He held it open so his bride could join him. He pushed the button to their floor as she flew through the door. She was ready to attack him when he grabbed her arms, held them against her body, and kissed her. 

She tried to kick him, but he had her pinned against the elevator wall, with his legs outside hers. He was taller, and stronger than she, and to struggle was useless. 

When he let her mouth go she screamed, "You can't kill us all." 

"What did you forget Delicious? Think before you act. What did you forget? When did I make that statement? How long have I known Gordon? Does that little boy ever forget anything?" 

Delicious thought for a moment, and calmed down. "I think I have to use my left foot." 

"No you don't. You just acted on partial information. You are still new to our partnership. I will never hurt you by saying something that sexist again. Let's go to our room, and change into our traveling clothes. We have to go back to our party and say goodbye to our guests. Then we will take Europe apart." 

"Is it the Rhine or the Rhone River Valley?" 

"It's both; they just go through different countries. I will show you both of them." 

"I packed two pair of my running shoes. It would be fun to run around Paris." 

"If that's what you want to do, then we'll do it." 

"Do you want a quickie?" 

"As much as I would like to say yes, a quickie with you could take all night. Let's get changed and be on our way." 

************ 

As they went through security at the airport, Gray said to Jayden, "Eighteen agents are coming with us?" 

"You should be thankful; I had to talk your father down from thirty. Europe is not the safest place for you right now." 

A flight attendant walked up to them and said the plane was ready to leave. She asked them to follow her. It was not the hardest thing on the eyes to do. 

Logan jabbed Jayden in the ribs and told him to behave. He was getting married next month and if he didn't he would tell Marcie about his antics. 

"My friend, I will look until I die. However, I will never touch another woman but her." 

"You should never have gone to that auto dealership." 

"It was the best day of my life." 

They walked out on the tarmac to see a brand-new Boeing 787, with Air New Zealand markings. It had a painting of Smaug the Dragon, from the movie 'The Hobbit', along the entire fuselage. It looked fantastic. 

When Delicious asked what was going on, the flight attendant said it was a new aircraft that wasn't scheduled for delivery until next month. It was a wedding present from Boeing, specifically set up for this trip. 

When they entered the aircraft she could see what the flight attendant meant. The front 60% of the aircraft was designed as first-class. 

Delicious asked, "What is behind the door?" 

"You will have to find that out for yourself." 

She took Gray's hand and walked to the rear of the aircraft expecting to see her family there waiting to surprise her. She was wrong. 

She opened the door and was amazed to see it decorated as a bridal suite. She jumped up and down like a teenager. She jumped into Gray's arms and told him that if he fell asleep on this journey she would cut him off for the rest of their honeymoon. 

"Honey, it's only seven hours to London, I think I can stay awake that long." 

She reached into her carry-on luggage, pulled out a package, and showed it to him. 

"I have three of these in my bag. I will test myself tonight, in seven days, and when we get home. If I am not pregnant by then, I am going to start looking for the second team." 

"There's nothing like putting a little pressure on your husband is there?" 

"The Doctor said I was fine and raring to go. That only leaves one person to be tested. Do you want to guess who that is?" 

"Have you ever heard the term ANAL PARKING?" 

"Yes I have, but if I'm not pregnant you don't have a prayer in hell." 

"Ladies and gentlemen please take your seats we are about to take off." 

******** 

As they reached their cruising altitude of 39,000 feet, Gray noticed they were going the wrong way. 

"Jayden were being hijacked. We're heading Southwest instead of East." 

"Are you sure Doctor? Could it be altitude sickness; are the stars out of alignment, or the rotation of the earth on its axis has gone in reverse?" 

"I'm going to open the door to this aircraft and throw you out if you don't tell me what's going on." 

"The pilot decided to go the long way around the earth." 

"Jayden what is going on?" 

"The higher ups decided Europe was too hot for you two to go there. You would be too exposed. We could have had an army around you and they still could have gotten to you. Most of the people on this airplane don't know where we're going except the flight crew, Logan and I." 

"I guess were going to New Zealand." 

"New Zealand, and Australia; you will swim and snorkel the great barrier reef, and have a good time. Even hopes you're not too disappointed. He just wanted both of you safe." 

"He doesn't have to worry about me, because I understand his fears. I will close the door and if the airplane loses a few thousand feet you will know what her reaction is." 

"I'll tell the troops to buckle up." 

*********** 

The duvet was off the bed. She was lying naked on top of it waiting for him. She smiled, "I couldn't wait until tonight to take the test. Husband, the pressure is off; I'm pregnant. The little stick turned blue." 

"Did you ever doubt my virility?" 

She knew he would come back with a smart remark of some kind, and was ready for him. From under her pillow she pulled out an open bottle of water, and threw it at him. She hit him in his midsection, knocked the air out of him, and wet him from head to toe. 

"You little wench. I'm going to give you the spank you so richly deserve." 

She did not hesitate. She turned over, put a pillow under her stomach, and waited. 

Her eyes were closed, and she had a smile on her lips. She was given everything, and more than she ever dreamed she would have or deserve. She had a husband who loved and adored her. More importantly, she was going to be the mother of his child. 

Her mother promised all her dreams would come true, and they were. Her life had turned around one hundred and eighty degrees from the day she was left alone, and unknowingly met her father the next day. She said a silent prayer, "Thank you mommy, thank you for preparing me for life." 

She felt his hand rub against the small of her back and she began to drip in anticipation. 

"What am I going to do with you?" 

"Make love to me please. I am so ready for you, and so is your child." 

"I'm going to spank you first, because you know you've earned it." 

"If you think so, spank me." 

"How can I spank the mother of my baby?" 

"The way you always have. I want to make love Gray, please hurry." 

He forgot about the spanking as he kissed each of her toes. Then he licked her ankles. His tongue worked its way up the back of her calf to her knee, crossed over, and worked his way down the other side. 

"No Gray not now, don't tease me, I need you." 

He didn't answer her. He continued to torment her, and drive her higher towards her inevitable orgasm. He loved to see her body go rigid, her mind go blank, and the peaceful look return to her face as she returned to a calm state. He waited 10 months for this pleasure, although it felt like years. Now he was enjoying every second of it. 

As his teeth nibbled on the interior of her thighs, he could see bubbles forming, growing, and popping as they exited her vagina. If he had his cell phone and took a picture of this little miracle, he could win another $100 from her. He knew she would not let him live long enough to spend the money after she saw the photo. 

He decided to forgo her right thigh, and plunged his tongue into her pussy to taste her nectar. 

Delicious was not expecting this preemptive strike. He was normally predictable, and what he did to one side of her body, he did to the other side. When his tongue entered her unexpectedly, her head popped off the pillow, her back arched, and she came. She also complained when she returned to mother Earth. 

"You bastard, you cheated. I wasn't ready." 

"Did I just hear you complain about a wonderful orgasm?" 

"No, yes, no, I don't know, you surprised me, that's all. It was wonderful." 

"Do you always want me to go by the numbers?" 

"No, that would get boring." 

"Tell me what you want me to do Delicious, and I will try to accommodate you." 

"Would you do what you asked me to do? Never change, always be yourself." 

"I can do that." 

"I think I'll go to sleep now." 

"What did you just say?" 

"I said I was going to sleep. I thought you were finished." 

He brought his hand down on her right butt cheek with a flourish. Delicious didn't cry out, or say ouch. She laughed. 

"Gray, you are so predictable." 

"I will give you predictable." 

He moved alongside her, took her left leg, and pulled it over his right hip. Before she knew what happened, he was balls deep inside her. 

"Oh Lord this is different." 

"Complaining again Mrs. Thyme? You told me to be myself, and as your dad says, 'I am a scientist; I am always inventing new things.' This position is anything but new, except to you." 

"I'm not used to having a conversation with something deep inside me pounding at my cervix. I will have to look this up on Wikipedia." 

He twisted her quickly and said, "Don't bother." 

She was now on top, looking down, moving her hips at an even pace. 

"Are you tired already Doctor Thyme?" 

"Hardly my dear, I am about to show you another position. Turn yourself around, without extracting me from your insides." 

"How am I supposed to perform that feat of magic?" 

"Think about it, and be inventive." 

She did, and in about a minute, she was facing the rear of the aircraft laughing. 

"That certainly felt funny." 

Gray sat up behind her, played with her breasts, and tormented her clit. 

"What maniac thought this position up?" 

"Some guy from Maine." 

"That was not funny Gray; but it does feel really good." 

"If you like this position, watch what happens next." 

He pushed her forward onto her forearms, and she screamed because of the changing position of his penis inside of her. 

Using his leg strength, he stood up and began pounding into her fast and hard. Delicious was in a sixty degree down angle, yelling at him, "Oh Gray, do it, give it to me, push it in deep. Give me everything you have." 

He did. For as long as he could, he was ruthless in his pursuit of punishing her pussy, banging against her cervix, and seeking his elusive orgasm. 

Delicious screamed time and time again as she cascaded over the edge so many times she lost count. Finally, she became a ragdoll in his arms. With the roar of a lion in its prime, he emptied himself inside her. 

Exhausted, he fell to his knees and lay on the bed. He gathered her to him, and kissed her. 

"Baby, if you say one word, I will crush you to death." 

She didn't hear him. She was asleep. 

58. Who Dun It 

Two men walked in to the University of Chicago's energy lab when Doctor Clawson was alone. They locked the door and approached him menacingly. He was immediately frightened. 

"My wallet is in the desk, you can have my watch and my ring. I don't have anything else to give you." 

"We are not here to rob you Doctor. We are here to ask you one question, and if you lie to us we will know instantly. Several months ago you signed a nondisclosure agreement for Mister William Zabo regarding work on an antigravity formula. Think carefully before you answer this question Doctor; did you speak to anyone about that conversation." 

Doctor Clawson breathe a sigh of relief, and without delay he answered, "No I did not." 

"Thank you Doctor that will be all." The two men turned around and left the building. When they reached their car, one of the men called an unlisted number and spoke one word, "No." 

He took the chip out of the telephone and destroyed it. 

William Zabo did not like the implications of that phone call. If the leak was not from Doctor Clawson, the leak was in Austin Texas, and that was bad news. He called Shelby, and told him there was a fox in his henhouse. 

"Are you sure William?" 

"100%." 

"Thank you, I will let you know what protocol I'm running in a few days. I have to speak to my dad." 

"Patricia has a program that will solve your problem. She used it to ferret out a mole at the Director of the FBI's office. Call her, but not from the office or at home." 

"I will William." 

*********** 

Using Patricia Valentino's 'Honey Trap' program made finding the mole easy. The trap found him 10 days after they tied everything into the mainframe computer. 

Sean Halliday was a senior agent in the company, and had never failed a polygraph test. His work was always superior. He was in charge of the Southern Region which stretched from Mississippi to New Mexico, and North as far as Missouri. No one who worked for him, or with him, had a bad word to say about him. As far as Shelby was concerned Sean was above reproach; until he was caught in the 'Honey Trap'. He was giving out top-secret information on Even's project planted in the computer. Only top-level managers were supposed to see and know this information. Sean was not one of them. Something else Sean didn't know was that the information, although looking scientifically, and technically correct, when it was tested, it failed. 

The problem was what to do with Sean, because they knew who he contacted: US Representative Horace Bordeaux from Louisiana. Bordeaux, 'Chairman of the House Intelligence Committee has access to every intelligence agency, including the NSA, and CIA. His district included MicMillian Industries, the contractor building NASA's super rocket. Thousands of high-paying jobs would be lost if that company was forced to close. Worse than that, he could lose his seat in the House of Representatives for allowing it to happen. 

A very powerful man would do anything to keep that from happening in his district. Like John Boehner, the House Majority Leader, who forced the US Army to buy tanks, even though they don't want or need more. The company that makes those Abrams tanks is in his district. They would be forced to shut down if no one purchased them. Boehner would face the same problems as Bordeaux. 

Bordeaux already tried once, but failed at kidnapping or killing three of the scientists working on the competing project. He would make sure he didn't fail a second time. He would speak personally with those people that owed him protection for their nefarious operations along New Orleans waterfront, Bourbon Street brothels, and drug operations. The millions of dollars in his offshore accounts were due to them, but the information they received from him, and the intelligence agencies he had purview over, made their lives much easier, and infinitely more profitable. 

William received the news very calmly. He had his financial people target Bordeaux's accounts offshore. To him they were very small, but at the appropriate moment, those funds would disappear into China, and become a part of his minor accounts. 

Now that he knew who the tip of the spear was, he set out to bug everything Bordeaux owned, wore, or went, to gain as much information about his other activities. 

Celeste Castronova's micro-implanting companies became invaluable. Transceivers as tiny as the head of a pin, or as large as a pearl earring were planted everywhere. His most trusted aides were not immune to this invasion of their privacy either. Neither was his wife, children, or his two mistresses. 

Shelby turned a blind eye to where this new information was coming from. He compartmentalized it so Halliday knew nothing about it. All his work continued to be outstanding, but he could not take a shit without being heard. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 14



As a just in case Shelby let the 'Honey Trap' program run for a month longer just in case there was a second mole deeper entrenched in the company. If there was, the person was very good at his job. There were no whistles or bells that tipped anyone off during the entire time. 

William set one more operation in motion. He invited a longtime friend to dinner at his home in New York City: Colonel Lucius C. Canyon, US Army, Special Forces, Retired. They had not seen each other, face-to-face, in a very long time. However, these were extraordinary times and circumstances. Even the most secure communications could be overheard or eavesdropped upon by the NSA. When you are planning to eliminate a sitting member of the US House of Representatives, you take every precaution necessary. 

William did not use his computer or any electronic device to print out the work orders for this meeting. He used an old Remington electric typewriter to compose each question he would ask his friend. When he finished typing it out he burned the ribbon. He could talk about any subject while Lucius was reading the document just in case anyone was listening in from outside. 

Lucius could answer the questions, and ask his own, if there was a problem, by writing on a legal pad, William supplied him. 

There was one problem that never came up between these two men: money. William was always overly generous when the colonel and his men were called into action. 

Lucius wrote down one question. "How do you want me to rid you of this problem?" 

William wrote, "People who fly jet aircraft, while intoxicated often have accidents." 

Lucius smiled. In 'Man on Fire', the good guy shoved a bomb up the ass of the bad guy, and set it off by a timer. That would ruin your whole day if you were at 51,000 feet." 

William smiled, and wrote, "It would ruin your day if you were on the ground." 

When the evening ended, William handed the Colonel a suitcase with $20 million in it. He shook his hand, and gave him a note saying there would be $50 million more sent by courier, to the usual place, in two increments." 

Lucius nodded. "Thank you very much sir." 

All the papers involved we burned. 

U.S. Representative Horace Bordeaux was dead; he just didn't know how, when, or where it would happen. 

************ 

The Boeing Company contest came to an end in April, and nearly 600,000 votes from schools all around the nation had to be screened. Some were ingenious, others childish. Picking out the top 10 was very hard, but since the winning prize was the same it mattered very little. 10 college S.T.E.M. scholarships and 10 Boeing internships were awarded. 

At their next general meeting they announced the winning names, and the name selected for their project. "The Deep Space Science Project." It was not a corporation, a company, or any kind of business, which would be taxable. It was a science project with a Board of Directors, whose members donated money of their own free will. According to the tax code they actually lost money on the project, because it was not tax-deductible, or a gift to a charitable organization. As William told the Board at their first meeting, the IRS tax code is so out of date they didn't know what the left hand was giving out, or what the right hand was taking it in. 

Now that the world knew what the name of the Project was, they wanted to see what the craft would look like. 

I left it up to the board to make that decision. 

They wanted to see the craft before I published it. 

I told them I would never do anything without their approval first. 

************ 

Gray and Delicious returned from their honeymoon with only one complaint. 

"Dad did you know it was winter down there? We had to buy a new wardrobe for everyone, because at night we were freezing." 

I kissed her. "I know how you hate shopping." 

She giggled, he smacked me on the shoulder, and went to see both of her mothers. She saw Jennifer first. 

Jennifer asked, "Did you change your cell phone number?" 

"No, why do you ask?" 

"I've been trying to call you since you were married at the hospital. I can't get through to your home number or cell phone. What's going on?" 

"Dad didn't want you to give Gray and I the third degree on the beginning of our sex lives. He put a 'call block' on our phone numbers so you couldn't reach us." 

Jennifer shouted so loud, if I were at Rod's house I would have heard her. 

"Even, you are a dead man. Where are you, I'm coming to kill you." 

I was in the lab when I heard her yell. I knew Delicious had spilled the beans. I went to the one safe place Jennifer could not get to me. I stepped into my little cylindrical elevator pushed the button and started up. It twisted closed and I stopped it halfway up to cut the sound of the electric motors. I heard Jennifer run down the stairs and enter the lab. She screamed for me again. 

"Where are you Even. You are going to meet your maker today. You kept me from talking to my daughter. Do you know what an awful trick that is to pull on a woman. Delicious is the only female contact close to my age I can talk to freely, and you wouldn't let me talk to her. I am going to use you as a dartboard for the rest of your life, but I am going to use our best knives, instead of darts." 

I heard her rummaging around the lab looking for me, but after a few minutes she decided I wasn't there. I heard her feet pounding up the stairs in defeat, and start talking with Delicious again. I turned the motor on and continued up to the first floor in my private elevator. The door opened, I turned on the light in the broom closet so I wouldn't trip over anything, only to see the two women in my life staring at me. 

"You told her about my elevator?" 

"It would seem so dad. I believe mom is a little angry with you at the moment." 

"I believe that's an understatement. I kept you safe from her intervention after you got married, and this is how you repay me?" 

"I've never had two wonderful parents at the same time before. I want to keep it that way." 

"What are my options Jennifer?" 

"You don't have any you bastard. You got me pregnant again, so I can't kill you until after she's born." 

"It's a girl?" 

"I certainly hope so. I'm tired of looking at men all day long." 

"I asked you to do it the other way." 

Delicious smirked, "Anal Parking?" 

"What did you say," Jennifer asked. 

"We have to go to the movies. There's a picture the girls at the college were talking about. It's all about anal sex." 

"I would have to go to confession for the next 10 years, because I saw that movie." 

"You go to confession every week anyhow. What difference would it make?" 

"None, I guess. When do you want to go?" 

"Let's arrange for an all-girl protection squad, and we will go together. That should make it an interesting afternoon." 

"And women say men are crazy. I'm going back to work; where is Gray?" 

"He should be down there with Gordon by now." 

"Okay girls, I'll see you later tonight." 

"Wait one moment Doctor Luck. I told you I was pregnant, and I did not get a kiss." 

I kissed my wife, and thanked her for bearing my second child. Then I asked her a very important question. "Would you like me to have a vasectomy. This is your third child, and it takes a heavy toll on your body. I want you healthy when we leave this planet." 

"What happened to your baseball team?" 

"We can adopt as many children as we want. There are many needy children looking for a good home." 

"If I said yes would you be angry with me?" 

"Would I have brought it up if I was going to be angry with you?" 

"Even, what did I do to deserve you?" 

"You told me how to back into a mountain. I wouldn't be here if you didn't." 

"Yes, I would like this to be my last child." 

"I think I will have Rod take me to the Doctor. I can see him laughing all the way there." 

"I swear you two should of gotten married." 

"Divine didn't like him. She thought he was a hanger on, and beneath me. He wasn't, and he isn't. He is my best and my only friend." 

"Would you please tell me something I don't know." 

"Delicious didn't get a spanking while she was on her honeymoon." 

Jennifer whipped around and looked at her daughter. "He didn't spank you?" 

"No he didn't. He said if I was going to act like an adult, he was going to treat me as an adult. Adults don't get spanked, unless they are naughty adults. We were too busy making love to be naughty." 

Jennifer turned to scream at me, but I was safe in the cocoon of my elevator on my way down to the lab. She yelled to me anyway. "You better take that call block off my phone, or you won't need a vasectomy. Did you hear me Even?" 

"I'm sorry, my hearing aid batteries must be dying. I'll have to change them later today." 

"You will hear me when I have your prick in one hand and a serrated edge knife in the other." 

"I'm sorry dear, I can't hear a word you're saying." 

"I hate you Even." 

"I love you too dear." 

"Delicious have you ever met a man more frustrating than your father?" 

"Yes I have. I just married him." 

The two women embraced, and laughed. 

*************** 

59. Visiting the N. R. C. 

Rod was getting ready to take another trip to Washington to file our 19th patent in the last seven months when I received a phone call from the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. They wanted me to brief them on the nuclear engine, and the full-size nuclear reactor. I laughed at them. 

"You don't want to talk to me, you want to talk to my 18-year-old daughter. She designed both of those units using pencil, paper, and a high school computer." 

I won't bother telling you the insults he threw at me, I will just say we would need several more pretzel jars than we have on the table now, and they would all be full. 

When he was finished his tirade I said to him, "When my daughter finishes telling you about those two units, I want you to call me back and apologize for every word you said. If you don't I will sue you and the commission for slander." 

We set up a three day conference, and I told Rod to stay with her in Washington because Delicious was seven months pregnant, and I did not want her to be alone. 

When I told Delicious about this event she asked me if she could take Gordon along with her. I knew exactly what she was thinking, and we both laughed. He turned six in September, and they tested him out of elementary school. We were now homeschooling him as a freshman in high school. Let me change that he was homeschooling us. We could not find a thing that little boy did not know. He was a voracious reader. As Delicious said at the very beginning he was totally photographic. If the protection team did not remember where they put the car keys, he would tell them. 

The fun part was watching him train with Montgomarie. Gordon was 46 inches tall and weighed 45 pounds. Montgomarie was 6'2" tall (74") and no one dared ask what she weighed. Gordon didn't care. Monty told him to stand in a position and kick a weighted bag. Gordon would kick that bag with every ounce of his 45 pounds until Monty said he got it right. 

Then she would have him throw a forearm at the bag. Gordon would do it over and over again until Monty was happy with him. She loved the boy as if he was her own. She would do anything for him. 

One hour every day, six days a week they would train together. When they were finished she would hug him like a mama bear, and tell him how wonderful he was doing. When she sent him for his shower, he was glowing with pride. So was she. 

"Gordon, you're going to Washington, with your sister, to meet with the nuclear regulatory commission about the nuclear engine that is going into our spacecraft. They are also going to ask about the full size nuclear reactor. Feel free to speak any time you want to, because that's the reason Delicious wants you to go along. Do not be intimidated by any of these people, because they will be very antagonistic towards you because of your age. Feel free to put them in their place, without being too nasty to them. Always be a gentleman, and if it gets too out of hand, ask your sister if she wants to leave or not. We can always take these people to court if we have to. The one thing they don't want to do is face our lawyers in a court of law." 

"Should I brush up on how to deliver a baby dad?" 

Delicious said, "Don't even dream about it little boy, I have two more months to go before this little package gets delivered. Why don't you ask your mother that question. She is due one month before I am." 

"I came out of my mommy first, has anything changed?" 

"So help me God Delicious, if you answer that question I will kill you." 

"Mom, how would I know if it changed. I wasn't there the first time." 

I said, "Do you see what you started Gordon, we are going to be talking about intimate female parts for the rest of the day." 

"What's so intimate about them dad?" 

"That's it, I'm going down to the lab. If anyone wants me I'm on my way to Alaska, again. I want to find Michael to see if we can back into a tree in the other direction." 

Delicious laughed. "Chickening out dad?" 

"You bet your buttocks I am." 

"Shit, I thought I had you." 

"Gordon, you tell her please." 

"Sis that will be $10 please." 

"I hate you dad." 

"I love you too dear. Make sure you clear it with your gynecologist about flying in March." 

"Okay worrywart, I will." 

59. 'Shit Happens' All The Time 

William and Jemma welcomed their second baby boy into the world, without complications this time, on February 1 at 8:27 AM. Doctor Stephanopoulos was very pleased with the way the Cesarean Section went, and had Doctor Heightman, the cancer specialist, in the operating room with him to look around again to verify Jemma was still cancer free. Happily she was. 

When she was back in her room she asked her husband, "What shall we name him?" 

Without pause William said, "William III, naturally." 

Jemma picked up her water cup and threw it at him. 

"If you do that to my son you will be dead in the morning." 

"What would you prefer we call him?" 

"I want to call him by your real first name, Robert." 

"No, we already have a Robert in the family. Do you have another suggestion?" 

"I don't want to name him after anyone in my family. What was your father's name, and would you object naming our boy after him?" 

"Yes I would. How about Patrick? I have a Patricia, who has always driven me crazy. William has always been a respectful and honest boy, I have a feeling this little one will be a hell raiser." 

"I heard that dad. It's not my fault you weren't here." 

"Patricia not now, be nice to an old man, and a new mother." 

"Jemma, how can you look so gorgeous after delivering a baby?" 

"It's easy, it's the new drugs they use. You don't feel a thing. Thank you for the flowers, they are gorgeous." 

"You're welcome sis, is it going to be Patrick?" 

"Yes, I love the name." 

Patricia kissed Jemma, and turned to look at her father. 

"Dad may all your wishes come true." She smiled, congratulated him on the birth of his second son and kissed him. 

"William III, Jemma would have cut your balls off." 

"You women can't take a joke." 

"Dad, you don't know how to tell a joke." 

When I received the email about the birth of Patrick, I called to congratulate both of them. I asked him if it was too early to send his new son a flying cart. 

I would have needed another pretzel jar for his answer. 

********* 

On February 29 Jennifer's water broke. We took her to University Hospital where she was prepared for both natural and Cesarean Section childbirth. 

Her gynecologist was taking no chances this time. As soon as she entered the hospital, she was sent to radiology for an x-ray of her abdomen, and an ultrasound to see if she had any weak blood vessels or an aneurysm that might burst during a normal childbirth. 

The radiologist found none. 

I was not convinced. I talked with Jennifer and told her of my fears. I begged her to have another C-Section. I told her how much I loved her, and could not bear to lose her. 

She acquiesced. We had our third son on March 1, at 8:28 AM. When I walked into the recovery room she threw a glass of ice water at me. 

"I hate you Even. You couldn't give me a girl this time." 

I kissed her, and asked, "Do you want to try for number four and see if it's a girl?" 

"You will keep saying that to me until we have a football team, all 53 of them." 

"We will adopt all girls. You can buy all the dresses you want." 

"With my luck, they will all be tomboys." 

"That's my name dear, Even Luck." 

"What would you like to call our new son?" 

"Moe." 

"Moe, as in Larry, Moe, and Curly?" 

"Yes, when he goes to school, I want the teachers to call him 'Moe Luck'." 

"Jennifer where did you get your sense of humor, because it's time to return it to the store." 

"I'm sorry even, it's past its return date." 

"What are we going to name our son Jennifer, and if you don't give me a real name this time, I will do it myself. You know how good I am at naming things, do you want to take that chance?" 

"Holden, and if you say no you will never get laid again. I checked baby names for a month, and I love that name." 

"That's fine, Holden it is." 

I did not realize until after I signed Holden's birth certificate what my wife had slipped by me. I laughed, but I wanted to strangle her also. 'Holden Luck', when she meant 'Holding Luck'. My wife was a smart cookie, and I loved her so. 

Delicious sent out emails to everyone, and soon thereafter I received a call from William. 

"You missed us by a minute Even." 

"What are you talking about?" 

"Patrick was born at 8:27 AM. Holden was born at 8:28 AM. Both of them were born on the first of the month. Do you want to make a bet on when Delicious delivers her baby?" 

"Okay William, table stakes at this house is $100. What is your guess?" 

"$100 on April 1 at 8:29 AM." 

"I will take that bet, and say April 1 at 8:27:30 AM." 

"You scientists have to be absolutely precise every time don't you?" 

"I have two things to tell you William. First, if we aren't precise things tend to blow up in our faces. Second, do you own any automobile stocks?" 

"No, their performance is disgraceful." 

"If I told you as a friend to buy those stocks now when they are low and doing poorly, and in five years you would quadruple your money would you listen to me?" 

"You bet your life I would." 

"Remember William I won't be here for you to take my life." 

"What do you know that I don't know?" 

"Rod, Delicious, and Gordon are going to Washington Sunday. First thing Monday morning Rod is filing another patent for our carbon fiber products. The testing is completed and with a combination of the Carbon Fiber and Graphene automobiles, trucks, trains, and even aircraft will no longer need to be made of steel, aluminum, or any metals. Cars will weigh 1/6 of what a weigh now. We can move away from fossil fuels, because batteries will be able to move these cars two thousand miles or more, rather than the three hundred miles they do now. What do you think William?" 

"I think Einstein had better move over. You are a fucking genius." 

"It's not only me, it's Gray, and that six-year-old boy named Gordon. They are phenomenal scientists." 

"I'm going on a spending spree Monday morning thanks to you." 

"I'm going to the stars thanks to you William. May all your wishes come true." 

************ 

Delicious and Gordon stayed up late Sunday night playing one game of chess. 

Rod left the hotel at 8:15 AM and went to the Patent Office to file number 19. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 14



The clerk said, "We are getting tired of seeing you. What has Doctor Luck come up with this time? If he keeps going like this, I'm going to request a line just for his patent requests." 

"I have no idea what the good Doctor does in his laboratory. He gives me the finished product. I make six copies, have them signed by him and two witnesses', and notarize all of them. I fly here, from Denver first class. I stay overnight in a suite, dine at the finest restaurants in town. I come here in the morning, and fly home. I have a terrible life." 

The clerk laughed. "Yes, I can tell, because you're wearing a $2000 suit." 

They finished the process, Rod gave her the check, and departed for the hotel. He called Delicious and told her to meet him downstairs for the trip to the NRC. 

As they walked into the large meeting room, everyone was cordial. The NRC board consisted of six people: three physicists, and three nuclear engineers. The greetings may have been nice, but that did not last past the first question. 

"Mrs. Thyme, you are expecting us to believe you designed these nuclear devices by yourself when you were 17 years old?" 

"Absolutely not sir, I designed them when I was 15 years old, and I used my high school computer to help me." 

Gordon said, "Way to go sis." 

"Young man be quiet." 

"Why, you asked a question, she gave you the correct answer, and I congratulated her. Do you find anything wrong with that?" 

"Be respectful to your elders." 

"When I find an elder that needs to be respected I will, but anyone that insults my sister's intelligence, I will insult back. I don't know what your IQ is, but I guarantee you hers is higher, and so is mine." 

"Why are your containment vessels made of polycarbonate materials rather than steel reinforced concrete?" 

"Will you people get real. Did you read the facts and figures associated with these two units. The minimum lifespan, I said minimum, is 50 years without being refueled. Silicon Carbide, and Beryllium Oxide are earthquake resistant where steel and concrete are not. The best Los Angeles earthquake resistant buildings crack under a 5.0 earthquake. These vessels can stand the pressure of a 7.8 earthquake. They flex where concrete and steel crack. Ceramics can handle high temperatures better than any metals, or metal composites. Carborundum has a melting point of 4950°F. Beryllium oxide has a melting point of 4545°F. These are Argonne National Laboratory figures people. Are any of you prepared for this meeting, or did you expect a novice to come here that you could take apart easily?" 

"Why are you using Hexagonal nuclear rods instead of circular rods as we do now in all of our nuclear reactors?" 

"Gordon, I give up. These people are idiots, do you want to answer their question, or should we get up and leave?" 

Rod said, "Delicious if they are idiots let's just meet them in court and embarrass them all at one time. Jim Hearst would love to get a hold of them." 

Gordon said, "Rod let me take them to school before you make that decision. If they don't understand after I teach them what they should already know, then you can file a writ against the entire commission." 

Rod chuckled. "Gentlemen, you are about to have your assholes torn apart by a six-year-old boy. If I were you, I would pucker up now. Have at them Gordon." 

"Gentlemen do you know how thermonuclear fusion works or should I tell you to bring your memories up to date." 

"No you little asshole, tell us so we see if you know how it works." 

"Delicious you were correct, they are all idiots. Put your thinking caps on gentlemen I don't want to go too fast for you. 

Thermonuclear fusion is a way to achieve nuclear fission by using extremely high temperature. You can use controlled or uncontrolled to create nuclear fission. One equals a bomb, the other equals controlled energy. 

To control the reaction you have to control the kinetic energy of the particles by heating the material it will gain sufficient energy by giving the law and criteria the energy of accidental conditions within plasma high enough to overcome the Coulomb Barrier and the particles may fuse together." 

"Are you with me so far? Do you want me to continue or have I told you enough?" 

"Continue you little shit." 

"In Deuterium-tritium fusion reaction the energy necessary to overcome the barrier is 0.1 MeV. You have to convert between energy and temperature. The 0.1 MeV barriers would be overcome at a temperature in excess of 1.2 Kelvin. If you don't understand nuclear fusion by now you should go home and find another line of work." 

"Yes that will do nicely. I will ask the question again why not use circular rods instead of hexagonal?" 

"How many degrees of surface area are there in a circular rod? I know this is a hard question but if you think as deeply as a second grader, you may come up with the correct answer." 

"360°." 

"Excellent answer and it is also correct. Now here is a tougher answer for you to come up with. If you design a chamber in a hexagonal fashion, and place hexagonal nuclear pellets into those chambers how much more surface area do those nuclear pellets contact, and how much more power do they give out without wasting energy. The inside temperature of the current nuclear cores is not supposed to exceed 450°. The critical temperature is 600° if you are using steam to produce energy. We are not using steam to produce energy. We want our reactor to produce a temperature of 2200°, which is well within our safety range. We also do not want to waste the energy of our nuclear pellets. The nuclear engine will only be on for approximately one hour, and then it will be pulled back into the ship after it is cooled by a combination of the temperature of space, and our helium cooling system. Extremely fast heat and extremely fast cool will give us the speed we need to reach 9.9 the speed of light, with the Ion H/2 engine, and the magnetic drives. For your edification, this person you called an idiot a few minutes ago designed all three of these engines. Two of them are already built and ready to go. They are already patented. All we are waiting for is your approval for the third engine so we can start to build it. If you delay us more than six months, you will be sitting in court shortly thereafter. Have a good day gentlemen, we are finished taking you to school." 

"Wait, we have more questions." 

Gordon replied, "The next time you ask us here it better not be to waste our time. Rod has taped everything that was said in this room, which is allowed under the law. You have also taped everything that was said in this room also. I guarantee you have embarrassed yourselves. If you play this for your supervisors, I guarantee you he's going to chew your asses off for not being prepared. A six-year-old boy had to remind you how nuclear fusion works. 

The next time I'm here, I will tell you how we solved the problem of Nuclear Fission. Doctor Luck, Doctor Thyme, Mrs. Thyme, and I are working on that problem in our spare time. The only problem we have is the lasers are too big to fit in our laboratory. If we could overcome that problem, we could have breeder reactors online within 10 years. Pollution from coal powered electrical plants would end. Rod just filed a patent that will change the automobile industry in 5 to 10 years. The world is changing gentlemen, move ahead with the times, or be like the dinosaurs, and become extinct." 

Delicious said, "Holy Shit little brother, dad told you to be nice, not eviscerate the entire panel." 

"Sis, they should have been nice to you, and I would've been nice to them. Rod can we go to Wendy's now?" 

"Montgomarie is outside that door. Do you think I would say no to her?" 

"I do, why can't you?" 

"She likes you. I can't say the same for me." 

Delicious said, "Come on kid, feed me I'm pregnant." 

"Don't worry about it I know how to deliver a baby." 

"Gordon, you are not delivering my baby. I don't care how good you are. You are not seeing my privates." 

"Are they different than my mom's?" 

"Yes, because they belong to me." 

"Or in other words they are not different. They are just on a different person." 

"Gordon, you are the smartest man I know, with the exception of my father." 

"I'm smarter than Gray?" 

"No, you and Gray are a tie." 

"Are we going to finish our chess game?" 

"Do you remember where all the pieces were?" 

"Yes." 

"We will buy a chess set, and resume our game on the airplane. How does that sound to you?" 

"I'm still going to beat you." 

"No you're not. I may not win, but I will not lose." 

"You are cheating. You are playing for a draw." 

"Who me, would I do that to you?" 

"Yes you would, and that's not fair." 

"Little brother some of the greatest chess matches in history ended in a draw." 

"Big sister, I'm beginning not to like you." 

"I love you Gordon, I love you very much." 

"I know." 

Oh how I wanted to spank my little brother. Then I realized I was thinking like my husband, and banished the thought from my mind. I ruffled his perfectly combed hair with my hand instead. 

He stopped and stared at me. "I don't like when you do that to me." 

I got even with him for the many times he did this to me. 

"I know." 

We stared at each other for a moment, and laughed. 

We received permission to build the nuclear engine two months later. 

************** 

Delicious went for her final checkup and advised Doctor Greenly of the bet between William and I. He thought it was ludicrous because no one could predict the date, or time of a birth down to the minute or second. She agreed with him, but made him promise to put the exact time of birth down for the record because of the huge bet. 

Doctor Greenly, "How large is the bet?" 

"Doc, it's the maximum the house allows; $100." 

"These two billionaires are fighting over $100?" 

"It's not the money Doctor; it's the principle behind it." 

"Can I get in on this bet?" 

"I'm sorry Doctor, the betting window is closed." 

"Damn, I could have given you a drug that would guarantee I would win." 

"My father would invent something that would haunt you for the rest of your life." 

"Knowing your father, he would probably do that. I will see you April 1, apparently sometime around 7 o'clock in the morning. I will be able to get a good night sleep." 

"You don't have any other patients due around the first of the month?" 

"Yes, I have several that are due, but none are due between 8:27 AM and 8:28 AM." 

"I'll see you around the first Doctor." 

"I wouldn't count on it; you are still carrying too high. I know you don't want to know the sex of the baby, but that little critter has to drop a long way before it can come out of you." 

Delicious laughed. "It's all because of my husband. He keeps pushing it back in." 

March was bitterly cold, but Delicious insisted on walking every day. Logan always held her arm as they walked, and six other agents formed a wall around her. They always carried semiautomatic weapons with them, since the attempted kidnapping. 

Sergeant Dan Fowler rerouted police patrols to increase security around the college area, which included University Towers. It looked good on paper because of the nationwide scandal of women being raped on college campuses. The Denver police were taking it seriously enough to send extra patrols into that area, thanks to Sergeant Fowler's routing changes. 

A month afterwards, he was promoted to Lieutenant, and he had not even taken the test. Jayden said he had friends in high places, and apparently he did. His men applauded the promotion, because finally one of theirs was in a position of authority, and not a handpicked 'yes' man. 

************ 

On March 28, Delicious was out for her afternoon walk when it happened. She stopped, put her right arm on her belly, squeezed Logan's arm to the point he thought she was going to break it, let out a scream, and after a moment she relaxed. 

The squad around her was ready to take her to the hospital, when she told them to relax. She opened her coat to see what happened. The baby she was carrying high around her stomach had dropped a foot. It was now down by her birthing canal. 

"Holy crap, I think this little person is getting ready for the big day." 

Logan asked, "Are you okay baby?" 

"Baby, you must like me." 

"You are much easier to deal with now that you're getting laid regularly." 

"Is that a nice way to talk to your boss?" 

"May I remind you that you are not my boss. I am here to protect you, I am your father's employee, he pays me not you." 

"Yes, but I make your life more fun." 

"When Jayden gets back from his honeymoon, I'll tell him you said that. I want to see what his reaction is." 

"Should we give him a desk job now that he's a married man?" 

"If you did that to him he would go stir crazy. He wouldn't know what to do with himself." 

"I was just thinking about keeping them safe, like you're keeping me safe." 

"Jayden is safe as long as he's working. He stays sharp and we work as a team. We feed off each other. Our instincts warn the other one if there's a problem coming. He saved my life in Iraq, and I saved his twice. He owes me one, and I'll never let him forget it." 

"Have I ever told you that you too are insane?" 

"I don't think so, but it's true. We knew that since we were kids and he lived upstairs. We became inseparable." 

"My little friend is kicking up a storm. It's time for me to head home." 

"Do you want to go to the hospital instead?" 

"No, I'm not in pain; I was just surprised when it moved from the second floor, to the first floor. This next move should be interesting." 

"Most women I've heard talk about this next move have called it a lot of things. I've never heard it called INTERESTING!" 

"As you have learned over the past several years, my use of the English language tends to be skewed a little." 

"Yes ma'am, it certainly is." 

********* 

Delicious was tired and went to bed at 9 PM on Sunday, March 30. She was followed by Gray an hour later. The apartment was secure, two agents were on guard in the living room, and two others were sleeping in the extra bedrooms. Everything was peaceful in the Thyme household until 2:47 AM, when Delicious screamed, "God dammit Gray wake up, it's time to go to the hospital." 

Ever cognizant of his duties Gray replied, "Huh?" 

Delicious made it easy for him. She turned on the bedside lamp, pointed to herself, and said, "Wife, Hospital, Equals BABY, you fucking idiot." 

"Oooohhhhhh!" 

Delicious watched as Gray hurriedly got dressed, picked up the hospital suitcase, and ran out of the room. She shook her head in disbelief. 

Luckily for Gray the guards in the living room heard what was happening and stopped him before he left the apartment. 

"Sir, are you leaving something important behind?" 

"Stop fooling around, we have to get Delicious...She's going to kill me isn't she?" 

"Only if you're lucky sir." 

He walked back into the bedroom as if he planned everything. "Everyone's ready to go baby. Would you like to use the bathroom and change before we leave?" 

"Do you want me to beat the shit out of you now, or after I give birth. You are lucky you said you would only tell me the truth most of the time, because that lie was so obvious our baby knew it. Get me the fuck out of here you moron." 

"Can you walk or should I carry you?" 

"Help me out of bed and I'll know one way or the other." 

Gray wanted to stay out of arms reach, but he couldn't do that and help her out of bed at the same time. 

"You're going to hit me aren't you?" 

"What do you think my options are at this moment? Our baby is kicking me, and my husband was going to the hospital without me. What would you do Gray?" 

"Get down on my knees and pray for mercy." 

"Come on Gray get me to the hospital; I'll hit you tomorrow." 

He helped her up, and immediately she had a cramp, which doubled her over. 

"Gray, I think you better carry me." 

All four agents were ready to go, the cars were waiting by the curb when they left the lobby, and eight minutes later they were at the emergency entrance to the hospital. It was 3:11 A.M. 

Gray signed all the paperwork, and called me. I told him I was on my way. 

When I hung up the phone Jennifer said, "You are not going alone, I'm going with you." 

"So am I," Gordon said. 

"Do you hear everything that goes on in this room?" 

"No, just most of the things I want to hear." 

"Even, you are getting these walls soundproofed immediately." 

"I agree." 

"You two are no fun at all. How am I supposed to learn anything if you two won't teach me?" 

"You and I will figure out a way young man. If we can't do it, we will ask Montgomarie to help us. How does that sound?" 

"Do I have a choice?" 

"No." 

"In that case I accept, until I get a better offer." 

"Get dressed Gordon, we leave in five minutes." 

"Dad could you step into the hall for second, I have to ask you a question. I don't want to get in trouble." 

"Okay big guy what do you need?" 

"Is this a man's five minutes or a woman's five minutes?" 

"Even Luck you are a dead man. You have polluted my son's mind. He will never be the same." 

"Dad, I thought I said that quiet enough." 

"So did I Gordon. Sometimes women have the ability to use supernatural powers to get us men into trouble. We always have to watch out for that, and we can't always avoid it." 

Holden and Richard started crying simultaneously. I asked Jennifer which one she wanted. 

"Let me see; you are going to do both of them because I'm going to make this a woman's five minutes. I don't know how long a woman's five minutes is supposed to be, but I will make it as long as I want to make it to be sure you remember it the next time." 

"Should I remind you how long it was the last time so you have a reference point for it dear?" 

"Even do you realize how much trouble you are in now?" 

"Not as much trouble as I'm going to be when I cancel your credit cards." 

"I have my own money Even." 

"Yes I know dear. How long has it been since you've spent any of it?" 

"I also have the $5 million you gave me." 

"$5 million does not go as far as it used to go, especially if you want to adopt girls." 

"Even Luck, you are a real bastard." 

"Jennifer Stars Luck, you are the love of my life." 

"Even that's cheating." 

"Sue me." 

"We've been through that already." 

"What was your decision?" 

"You are a pain in the ass." 

"Soon dear, but not yet. We are still negotiating that process." 

"You stay away from me, you pervert." 

"I thought you were going to the movies with Delicious to learn all about it. How does that make me the perverted one?" 

Jennifer started pounding her head against the medicine cabinet. "What did I ever do to deserve you?" 

I knew I had her. "Don't you remember dear? We were on a flight to Anchorage, and you told a story about backing into a mountain. That is the reason the pilot and I survived an airplane crash. If you didn't want me so badly, you should've kept her mouth shut." 

"I never thought anyone would listen to that story, no less try it in a real life situation." 

"You were never faced with only two options: one was certain death, and the other was positively stupid. Which one would you choose Jennifer, which one would you choose?" 

She walked out of the bedroom completely dressed. She put her arms around my neck and kissed me. "I choose you, you idiot scientist. No one else in his right mind would have tried that stunt but you, and survive. Then you walk 40 miles and tell me we are getting married without asking me. You are a tank when you want to be Even. You roll over people with the force of your personality. You will never understand how deeply I love you." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 15







There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 15



"I swear that man is going to be the death of me."

"You are a lying sack of shit Callie. You would kill anyone that tried to hurt him. The only one that's allowed to hurt Alan is you."

"So what, he will still be dead."

"You would be miserable without him, and from what I've heard about Callum's sense of humor, you might be worse off."

"Callum is not a little chip off Alan's block, he's a giant redwood. He has Alan's sense of loyalty and cunning. He also has Susan's ability to read the Stock, and Futures markets. He also has a cutting sense of humor He has all that, and he's gorgeous too."

"Has he made a move on Cassie?"

"It's more like the other way around. She has the hots for him, but he won't touch her, because they are like cousins. They have grown up together; gone to the same schools, and to the same universities. I think they would be a perfect match except for one thing; it would make Alan and Is. It might drive both of those nutty."

"You and Alans, I can see that as a problem only if you want to keep your children from being happy. Do you want them to be unhappy? Have either one of you been sending mixed messages to your children?"

"I certainly haven't. Cassie is a grown woman. She has more suitors than she knows what to do with. She let Callum know she is interested in him, but gets no response. What do you want her to do, rape him?"

"Do you remember one night, a long time ago, when you were supposed to get me drunk? We went dancing and you nearly got laid, willingly, on the dance floor. Maybe those two need to go dancing."

"They have, many times, and I don't believe the magic is there. It's a shame, because their children would be gorgeous."

"I have a plan."

"I am in trouble."

"It's not all that bad."

"If you came up with it, the world is in trouble."

"I need Cassie and Christian to come here to help us with our Stasis problem. Laura and I have a problem with it. We need fresh eyes to look at it. We start killing people because of dehydration, and that's not good.

What if I call Susan and ask her if we can have Callum come east to give us a hand with it also. We have six houses on our property. Each of them can have a house and car of their own, or they can live together, whichever they choose. We will show them the simulations we have run, and hopefully they will find ways to help us with new ways of thinking around our problems. They will be put on the payroll, while they are here. They will get paid just as our scientists do."

"Patti, they need money like Custer needed more Indians."

"I know, but it's our money that's funding the project not theirs. It's only right that they be paid appropriately for the time and effort they put into it. Don't you still get paid when you work at the hospital?"

"Yes I do, but I always donate it back to the children's wing."

"That's not the point Callie; you work, and you get paid. If your children work, they should get paid. They will be paid handsomely."

"I hate when you get logical with me Patricia. Let me ask Cassie if she wants to go to the snooty Northeast for a year or more."

"Cassie, get your ass over here."

"I haven't done anything wrong mom."

"You were born."

"I had nothing to do with that decision."

"Your Aunt Patricia wants to speak to you."

"Hi, she's been especially bitchy today."

"Yes I can tell. When I get off the phone with you I'm going to tear your mother another asshole. She was fine, until she called you to the phone. It's all an act, and she doesn't know how to stop acting around you or your father. I was the same way with my children several years ago. It was a very hard for me to understand it was my fault. Your mother is about to learn that lesson. Trust me it's going to be painful for her to hear it, so be nice to her afterwards okay."

"I'll try."

"I need you and your brother to come east and live with us for a while. I need your brains and your eyes to help us with the problem where having with Stasis. Laura and I have hit a wall we can't surmount. We are going to Canada for a few weeks to study up on Wood Frogs. We will fly down to Cottonwood and pick you two up on our way home if you agree. Ask your brother for me and let me know what your answers are please."

"Aunt Patti, I can give you my answer now. Yes, I would love to come to live and work with you. I believe Christian will give you the same answer. I will call you later today to make it official. I'm thrilled about this, absolutely thrilled. When does Robert get home from Michigan?"

"If he doesn't stay to party after finals, he should be home June 6."

"Does he have a girlfriend?"

"Yes he does, BOOKS. He can't get his nose out of books. You would think computers weren't invented. He loves computers and uses them like we do, but he lugs those books around with him wherever he goes."

"Don't let him fool you Aunt Patti, he probably just uses them for exercise."

"Why does he have his light on in the middle of the night with them open in his hands."

"He stretching the tendons his fingers."

"Okay, I give up. Call me when you have Christians answer. Let me speak to the wicked witch of the Southwest. Bring her a towel she can cry into, and a handheld phone she can carry into her bedroom. She will be there for a while. Goodbye Cassie."

"Goodbye Aunt Patti, it'll take me a second, but she will have the phone shortly."

*************

(BACK TO Ch. 61 - THE NEXT DAY)

Monty and I had spoken the evening before, and I asked her not to leave. I told her Gordon's ego was too fragile at this moment, and if she left him it might shatter. She could be harder on him if she thought it would help, but most of all he was to be out of the office at 6PM every day. If she had to grab him by the scruff of the neck to accomplish this, she had my blessing. If she wanted to train him on his three days off that was fine with me."

Monty smiled at me evilly, and nodded her head. "Thank you."

I had a feeling Monty had something in store for Gordon he was not going to like.

**************

That evening Gordon did not come to dinner. I asked Monty to check on him. When she returned she said he was asleep in the same clothes he was wearing this afternoon. He was not feverish or sweating, and he was breathing fine.

I thanked her and told her she could leave for the evening. She was due to get off in an hour anyhow, and there was no sense in her staying.

When dinner was over I helped Jennifer with the dishes, and played with Richard and Holden. They were getting to be a handful, especially Richard. He was strong, and smart. He was not in the league with Gordon, but I was very pleased with his progress. Holden on the other hand was a real pisser. Nothing was sacred to him. If it was within his reach, it belonged to him. He could climb anything. We had a 7-foot tall pole lamp in the den. To turn it on you had to pull a string, which we intentionally kept very short. Jennifer took pictures of that little bugger 4 feet off the floor climbing up that pole. Finally, he was able to get high enough to pull the string to turn on the light. His weight offset the balance of the lamp. Both he and the lamp came crashing down.

Jennifer screamed when she heard the crash, knowing what had happened. When she arrived in the den Holden was sitting there pulling the string, making the light go on and off.

He said, "Mommy, the light fell, but it still works."

She was so relieved he wasn't hurt she let him sit there and play with it, while she took pictures of him. We put the light into the garage that evening, and never found a way to replace it. If I wanted to read it had to be in the kitchen or in the bedroom.

I was about to leave for work Saturday morning, when Gordon walked down the hall and asked me if we could talk.

"No, you had your opportunities all week at the dinner table, and you never said one word to any of us. You thought you were punishing us by being quiet. You're finding out you only punished yourself. I should be home by 7 o'clock this evening, and if I am in a good mood, and not too tired from doing my work, and your work, I'll think about talking to you."

"Dad please, I'm sorry, can I have a few minutes of your time. I will give you all the money I have saved, for just a few minutes of your time."

"I have more money than I will ever use. Why would I need your money?"

"It's the only thing I have to offer you."

"No it's not, I want your respect, and you have not been giving it to me. I have been giving you all the respect and love I have in me, and what have I been getting back from you; lies and disrespect. I am your father. Anytime you want to break those bonds between us just say the word. I will have Rod have the adoption canceled. You will still be your mother's child, nothing will ever change that. However, I will have no further claim on you. You will no longer have to answer to me, only to your mother.

The spaceship becomes my project, not yours. You will stay on earth, with your grandmother until you reach the age of majority. Your mother will leave you her estate, and you will be set for life. You will have the plans for it, and if you can find investors of your own, you can build another spacecraft and follow us into the future. I am so angry with you, and upset because of your behavior I wanted to hit you. I have never hit anyone in my life, and if I didn't hit Delicious, I wasn't going to hit you."

"The last time I was this bad dad, was when I was two years old. Mom beat the crap out of me. I mean that, she actually beat me so hard I shit in my training pants. I talked back to her rudely, and I got what I deserved. It was also the last time I was hit. I realized that my behavior was a reflection on who I was. I knew I was not the kind of person that talked back to his mother.

I am also not type of person who does not show gratitude for what is given to me, whether it is on the dirt floor, or a silver platter. You have given me everything any boy could dream of. You have given me every opportunity to grow and become my own person, but I don't think I ever said thank you. I love you dad and if you give me another chance I will never disappoint you again."

I didn't say a word. I picked up my briefcase, opened the front door, and walked out. I waited a few seconds and stuck my head back into the house.

"Would you hurry up and get changed, you're late for work."

Gordon didn't know what to do with himself. He screamed for joy, did a back flip that nearly knocked over his mother, who was walking down the hall.

Jennifer asked, "Why are you so happy this morning?"

He kissed his mother. "Dad is taking me to work. I have to change and get ready to go."

"You stink, a shower would be good."

"Mom I don't have time right now."

"Take a shower Gordon."

"Yes mom."

It may have been the quickest shower on record, but he did get wet.

"Goodbye mom, I'll see you later."

"Put your shirt on Gordon."

"I will mom, when I get in the car."

Not only did he have to put on his shirt, but also his shoes and socks.

I asked him what took him so long. He told me his mother told him to take a shower, and he didn't want to get into trouble with her.

I told him it was a good choice.

"What did you do all week?"

"Dad, I am very close to getting the fusion reaction figured out. If we have not finished the fission chambers we may be able to exchange them without notifying the NRC. We will not be using them in their jurisdiction. If I'm able to do it, and we use the reactor as I planned at our first meeting, there is a possibility we can get up to eight times the speed of light. That's what I was working on when they handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the SUV. When I put the figures into Big Blue it hesitated before it spit out the speed. Even that big computer thought the speeds were unattainable. Dad it is possible, I know it is. We can go planet hopping if I'm right. If Kepler 289D is not habitable, we can hop over to Gliese 422B in less than a few days. 

We won't have to go back into stasis to make the trip. We can orbit either one of these two planets, and with our telescopes and other instrumentation. We may be able to find other Mesoplanets, like Earth, in the Goldilocks zones that have not been seen by any earthbound or space bound telescopes. We will be the first to know what's out there."

"How did you do all this without a computer?"

"How much paint do you think it will take to do my room?"

"What did you do Gordon?

"You took away all my paper, but you left me with all my pens and pencils. The only thing I could think of was to write on my walls. If mom calls you, and you hear her scream, tell her I will paint my room tomorrow, after I take pictures of all my calculations."

"Have you ever heard the term the best defense is a great offense."

"No, what does that mean?"

"Call your mother, and tell her not to go into your room under any circumstances. You have stripper magazines all over your floor."

"You want me to lie to mom?"

"Do you want to be alive tomorrow?"

"I think I'd rather tell her the truth. I will tell her I'm painting the room tomorrow."

"Good boy Gordon; the more lies you tell; the easier it is to get caught."

"I remember this building. Let's go to work."

He was about to open the door, when I grabbed him. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I've been away from here for five days, and I forgot protocol. I am an idiot. It won't happen again."

"It better not happen again. Otherwise your back in your room, and this time I will make sure there are no pens, pencils, crayons, markers, or anything else capable of writing on your walls, ceilings, doors, or floors. "

"I screwed up twice in one week dad, and I got punished. I got your message, and I promise to try harder not to do it again."

"That's good enough for me son."

Our agents surrounded the car, took up their positions, and opened the door. Gordon and I moved swiftly from the car into the main entrance, and disappeared into the bowels of the building. It took a total of four seconds from portal to portal. We were getting very proficient at this transfer.

************

"Hello Susan, this is Patti how are you?"

"What the hell did you say to her? We had to run over to Harold's place to get Callie to stop crying."

"I told her it was time to grow up."

"You told Callie to grow up? Are you out of your fucking mind? That's like putting dynamite in a child's hand, and having her play with a pyromaniac."

"I know, but it had to be done. She was driving everyone in her house crazy, just like I was doing with my family. It wasn't any good for them, and I had to put an end to it. I tried the easy way first, but that didn't work. So I did it the hard way, and from what you just told me I guess it worked."

"You're damn right it worked, but Alan may kill you. She was nice to him last night. Regardless of what he tried to do to her he could not get her pissed off. Every time he tried something outrageous, she would giggle. He came home infuriated. It was like he lost his only playmate."

"I didn't see that coming Susan. I only wanted Callie's family to get along better. I didn't think it would interfere with anything else."

"I guess we will wait to see how long this new Callie lasts. If it is permanent, I would put bulletproof windows on your house."

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry Patti, I shouldn't have said that."

"It's okay Susan; it was a long time ago, and I've finally learned to live with it."

"It was still insensitive of me to say. I really am sorry I said it."

"If you really want to make amends, send me Callum for a few years."

"No, you can't have him. Why do you want him?"

"We have a problem with our part of the spacecraft program. If we don't fix it the whole thing will go bust. Callie said Callum is an excellent problem solver. We need one of those desperately. Christian and Cassie are coming to give us fresh eyes with the technical portion. If Callum can look at it from a different perspective just maybe we can crack this open. We need at least one year for a human trial, and we have to find a volunteer for that. The possibilities of brain, spinal, and organ damage are enormous. The volunteer could be dead before we know what killed him or her. The clock is ticking down, and we don't have that much time left. He can have his own house and a car while he is here. He will be paid just like Christian and Cassie, but we really could use his help."

"He's in Los Angeles. Let me give him a call, and I'll have him call you back."

"What is he doing in Los Angeles?"

"They were filming a movie here, and they needed my horses. Callum helped bring them out to the site. He was helping teach this young actress how to ride. One thing led to another, and she wound up riding him more often than the horse. Turns out she's a very well known actress. One night he went there all dressed up in his cowboy duds to take Emma to a dance, and the director took a liking to his looks.

What's not to like: 6'4" tall, reddish blonde hair, real good looking, built like a brick shit house, and his brain works. So they flew him out to LA to take some pictures and do a screen test. I don't know if he's really interested or not. I just know he's going to be with Emma for a week. I think she liked him from the beginning. She's from Scottsdale, and everyone in Arizona knows how to ride a horse"

"It sounds like a real love story."

"I don't think so Patti. I think she just wants to parade him around on her arm. He's not bothered by it. He's his father's son, and he's no one's fool."

"That's great to hear. I will wait for his phone call, and I hope he accepts my offer. I will talk to you again Susan. Tell Alan I hope Callie returns to her old self with him as her measuring stick. Actually, I hope she comes after him with that stick. He would love it. Goodbye Susan, I will talk to you again soon."

***************

62. Dust or Texas

"I am not going to Texas. I've been to Texas and there's nothing there but sand. It gets in my shorts and it's uncomfortable as hell. I don't like Texas."

"Rod, the car service is going to be here in a few moments. Say goodbye to your children or say goodbye to your $5 million a year job. It's a simple choice: Do what Even asked you to do, or call him, and tell him you quit. I will stick by you either way. I will hold the phone to your ear so you won't drop it while you're talking to him."

"You don't think I'll do it, do you?"

"If you stop working for Even, you can have your vasectomy reversed, and I will have all the children I am capable of having with you."

"I wouldn't do that to you Rosalynn."

"Do not make me an issue Rod. This is between Even and you. I am just the icing on the cake."

"I have no idea what he wants me to do, but I'll be back as soon as I can."

"I have a feeling you should look for a house for us. We are not selling this one, I love it too much, and it's paid for."

"Daddy, the car is here for you."

"Okay, tell him I'll be right there."

"Start packing summer clothes into shipping boxes for yourself and the kids. As soon as I find something big enough for all of us, all of you will be coming down to be with me.

"Where else would we want to be?"

"I should ask the driver to take the kids for a ride for an hour or so. I want to take you back to bed."

"Take your time looking for a house, you just reminded me of how much extra rest I'm going to get."

"You will make it up to me when you get to Tempe."

"I'm not the one that's leaving, you are. You will have to make it up to me. It gets awful hot down there at this time of year. I will have to buy new nightgowns, or possibly sleep naked. What terrible choices."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 15



"I hate you Rosalynn. I now have to ride 90 miles to the airport with a hard on."

"I have to go shopping to make sure I have enough D cell batteries. Find us a home Rod, and it will solve both our problems."

"I hate to do this; goodbye Rosalynn. Take care of our kids. I will call you tonight. I will be house hunting this weekend, I promise."

"I will be house hunting all week online. I will narrow the choices down for you. We are team Rodney, we always will be. Goodbye husband."

**************

Rod walked into my office and 12:10 PM, and in his usual chipper manner said, "What the fuck am I doing here?"

I didn't talk to him. I handed him four sheets of paper, listing the qualifications necessary to fill an opening that needed to be filled immediately.

"I need someone to fill that job yesterday. I am falling behind on my science because I have to sit behind this fucking desk to keep the paperwork moving. Find me that person now and you can go home."

Rod read through the requirements and kept nodding his head as he did so. He read through it once and then again as I continued to work. Finally he asked me what the salary range was, because the job not only required legal skills, but great organizational skills, contract negotiations, government interface and much more.

I made it sound like I was angry. "The president makes less than $500,000 a year. How much will I have to pay this idiot?"

"If you want me to do a search, it is going to take me 90 days minimum. At the end of that time I'll have six maybe eight people to interview that will take another 30 days. Then we will have to vet each one of the three winners; which will take up to two weeks. You're looking five months down the line before you can have someone sitting behind that desk. If you want to offer an executive a really big payday to leave where they are, and come here, you can have them here in less than a month."

"How much money am I talking about for a person with that type of that background?"

"You are looking at $3 to 5 million dollars.

"Shit, for that amount of money I could have you do it. Why didn't I think of that before? What a wonderful idea. I pay you $5 million a year isn't that right?"

"You know damn well you pay me $5 million a year. That's why you got me down here you asshole. Don't try to make me believe this was one of your brilliant, spur of the moment ideas. Rosalynn has already started house hunting."

"Okay, you caught me. You can go back to Denver. I'm sorry I bothered you. It was nice to see you again."

I dropped the bomb when Rod was halfway out the door.

"I never thought I would see the day you would turn down $5 million."

He nearly walked out of his shoes.

"What did you say?"

"I never thought I would see the day you would turn down $5 million."

"You said you were going to pay the guy $5 million. You already pay me $5 million. I won't be making any more money, and I will be doing 10 times the work?"

"Where is Gordon when I need him? I'll try to explain this to you myself. I pay you $5 million a year for being my personal lawyer. Is that correct?"

"Yes that is correct."

"If I hire you to take this job away from me so I can do the work I have to do to get my spacecraft off the ground that job pays $5 million a year. $5 million a year as my personal lawyer, and $5 million as my executive assistant would bring you to a total yearly salary of $10 million. Is that correct Rod?"

"You're going to pay me $10 million a year if I take this job?"

"Are you going to take the job or are you going back to Idaho Springs knowing that I need you here."

"You know damn well I'm staying here. I would kill myself before I turned down another $5 million. Rosalynn is already packing the kids summer clothes. As I told you she's already looking for houses."

"Why would she be looking for a house, when she has already rented one for you."

"You are a real bastard Even. You knew I was going to take the job, but you had to yank my chain anyhow. Did you enjoy it?"

"How many years did you enjoy yanking mine Rod? Be here tomorrow morning at 7:30 AM ready to work. The moving van is at your house now packing your furniture. Rosalynn knew you moving here last week. Jennifer told her all about it."

"I'm going to kill my wife. She knew about this and didn't tell me. She played her part perfectly. She never gave me a hint. When I left for the airport this morning, her eyes were misty. She missed her calling. She should've been an actress."

"There's one other thing you'll have to prepare your mind for. Everyone, including your children will always have a guard with them. We don't any chances with anyone being kidnapped or hurt, because of what happened to Gray and Delicious. Your house is under guard 24 hours a day seven days a week, even when you're not at home. There is a state of the art security system in it. You will have a guard with you at all times. If he or she tells you to jump, you will jump. Don't ask questions, do it. 

Oh, one more thing you don't drive anywhere, and neither does Rosalynn. Your protection detail does. If it's for a quart of milk, your driver brings you to the store goes in with you, and comes out with you. If you break protocol in any form or fashion, you will be taught the lesson painfully. I did, and I learned quickly."

(There was a knock at the office door)

"Come in."

"Sir, Mister Laver, and I have to go."

"Rod, this is Mister Steele; he is your agent during the daytime. Steel, who is going to be Mrs. Laver's agent?"

"Mrs. Laver daytime agent is Lexi. Her nighttime agent will be Anna."

"Thank you Steel. Goodbye Rod, I'll see you tomorrow morning."

"Even, where am I going?"

"Unless you want your wife to sleep all alone, or with Steel at the hotel tonight, you're going to the airport."

"You are miserable sonofabitch, I don't care what Divine said about you."

"You're wrong Rod. She said those things about you. Get going before you miss your wife and Steel has to sleep with her. Steel, she is a stunner. Just remember don't kill Rod over her. I need him. You can shoot him in the legs, as long as he can work sitting in a chair, it's fine with me."

"I'll try to control my baser instincts sir. This way Mister Laver, watch out for the scorpions in the backseat of the SUV."

"I will get you for this Even."

"Who signs your checks Rod?"

"You do your Majesty."

"I like that answer better. Say hello to Rosalynn for me."

"Yes your Majesty, just before I kill her."

***************

He kissed his wife as she entered the terminal. "You know I should kill you for deceiving me. I flew down on a commercial airline. Even flew you down on a private plane. He really wanted to dig this one into my spine, didn't he?"

"If you're not happy to see me, I can always go home and be with my children."

"How long will it be before our children get here?" 

"They will be staying with friends until the end of the school year."

"Are you telling me we have 3 ½ weeks alone?"

"How can you be so smart Rod and not be able to count. You forgot the three days travel time."

"It's only a two hour airplane trip from Denver to here."

"They're coming in our maxivan Rod."

"Who in their right mind would want to drive them down here?"

"Our new agents will be driving them here, with a car in front and a car in back. The van is being totally serviced now. They are putting special tires on it, and running it through a complete battery of tests to make sure it is in top shape. The best part is, you are paying for this out of your new salary."

"That's another thing I wanted to talk to you about."

"Do you want to talk to me about it here in the airport, or at the hotel?"

"If I get you to the hotel room, I will not want to talk to you."

"I guess you don't want to see my new nightgowns."

"You knew all about this."

"I was going to take the job myself. Even said it would hurt your ego, and you wouldn't be able to take care of our children."

"I hate it when he's right. Are you hungry?"

"Yes I am, but not for food."

"I thank the day you wore those blue panties."

"I'm not wearing any panties now."

"You're not wearing any what?"

"I'm leaving for the hotel now. Are you going to join me?"

Rod was frozen to the spot, and his mouth didn't work. Rosalynn started walking towards the exit.

Lexi and Steel intercepted her.

"Hello Mrs. Laver, I'm Lexi, and this is Steel. I am your daytime agent, and he is your husband's agent. You will never go anywhere without me at your side. If you go to a public restroom, I will be in there with you. This is my job, and I take it very seriously. If you need anything, you ask me first, and I make the decision for you. Do you understand?"

"Yes Lexi, Doctor Luck explained all of this to me last week. If I make any mistakes please feel free to correct them instantly, especially when my children come down. I don't want anything to happen to them."

"You and I will get along just fine, Mrs. Laver. Why is your husband standing there like a statue?"

"We are both addicted to sex Lexi. Six children should make that evident. I just told him I wasn't wearing panties, and his mind went into overload. I've never done this before, and he's trying to process it."

"You are a nasty girl."

"No, I am a good Catholic girl. That's why he's standing there like that. He can't believe I did something so naughty."

****************

Stephano and Patti spent most of the day locked in their bedroom. Except for their mandatory lunch and dinner breaks, they were not seen around the house. Just before 7 PM, and after a tearful goodbye from his wife and daughter, he got on the helicopter, flew to Albany, and on to Charleston. It was never a pleasant flight for him, and the crews knew to leave him alone.

When he arrived at Charleston, he was picked up by his agents. He was taken to work at his request. He would not be able to sleep, so there was no sense going to his apartment. The first thing he put on his to do list for the following morning was to hire a medical supply specialist. That would be quite a load off his back thanks to Patti's quick thinking. He would check the other items on his list, just in case he was doing things he should have farmed out to specialists. If he missed one obvious case, he could have missed others. He was staring at the door thinking about a project he was involved with, when he dropped a pen. He reached down to pick it up just as a high-powered bullet pierced through the window behind his head. He dove for the floor and rolled toward the concrete abutment under the window. Several more bullets pierced the window shortly afterwards but he was safe where he was. His back was full of glass, when he heard return fire going towards the position of the shooter.

From outside his door he heard Al yell, "Mister Valentino, are you okay?"

"Don't come in Al. He has a direct shot at that door. I can't get to the light switch to turn it off. Wait until the all clear is given. I am safe."

"Where are you situated?"

"I am directly under the window, by the concrete abutment."

"Very good, stay where you are. There are four of us here, four more downstairs, and 10 on their way. Everyone is on alert. The houses are all being covered; troops should be there within five minutes."

"Has anyone called the police?"

"Yes sir, as soon as the first shot was fired."

"Why here Al? It doesn't make any sense."

"Fear. If they can keep the scientists from coming to work, they think they might win."

"Call Doctor Luck's residence and make sure he's okay."

"Yes sir."

"Carmine, this is Al, I am with Mister Valentino, and he wants to make sure Doctor Luck is okay.

"Yes Al, all stations reported in, and everyone is accounted for. There is no activity around the 'NEST.' All the lights are on, and everyone is at work. Doctor Luck wants to speak to Mister Valentino."

"Tell him that is not possible. The all clear has not been given, and he has to stay where he is to say safe. I will have him call as soon as we can secure him."

"Doctor Luck wants to talk to you."

"Where is he Al, and why can't you get to him?"

"He ordered me not to come into the room. The shooter has a direct shot at his door, which I am standing by. His position is secure. He is underneath the pane glass window, which is where the first of many shots came through. He is protected by the concrete and steel the building is made of. As soon as the all clear is given, I will get him out of that room."

"Al, I want to talk to him as soon as that happens."

"Yes sir."

Two minutes later, the first police car showed up, followed by several more. The agents pointed to the area the first shots came from and told him their men were on their way to look for the shooter. They pointed to window the window the bullet went through.

The officer asked if anyone was hurt.

Just then, the sound of semi-automatic gunfire was heard coming from the area south of the position the shooter had been.

The agent smiled and said, "I believe so, but not in the building."

Over their radios they heard, "The perp is down, but unfortunately, he is not dead. Send an ambulance. We're about 60 feet in from Ajax and Collins."

"Good work guys; keep him alive. We have a lot of questions for him, and dead men don't talk."

"Come on Eddie, you're ruining my whole night."

"I'll buy you a diet Sprite."

"Do you promise?"

"Yes I promise."

"Al, all clear."

"Thank you, I'm going in. Stephano do not move. I will come to you."

Al opened the door a few inches and felt for the light switch. He turned the lights off, and slithered in on his knees and forearms to Stephano's position.

"I thought it was all clear Al?"

"What happens if there's a second shooter up there hiding in camouflage clothing that our guys didn't see? These people aren't dumb. When they went after Doctor Thyme, they went in heavy and dumb. This time they came after you, light and smart. If this guy had just taken one shot and moved, we would never have found him. He was pissed that he missed you, and you are going to have to tell us how. Let's get out of here so we can debrief you. Forearms and knees Stephano protect your hands.

In a moment they were in the hallway with the door to his office closed.

"You were very smart Mister Valentino, you took a great position, and the shooter couldn't get to you."

"Are you forgetting who my father was, and the men who trained me growing up?"

"Holy shit, you really are the Don's son? I thought they were joking with me."

"No they're not. I am the last surviving member of Don Alberto Valentino's family."

"I won't ask you how you got out of that business, but congratulations for doing it."

"Thank you, my father was very happy that I got out too."

"How did that guy miss you? You had to be a sitting duck in that chair."

"I dropped my pen."

"That only happened in movies."

"I'm happy to say you're wrong. Otherwise we wouldn't be talking."

The police came walking down the hallway and asked who they were shooting at.

Stephano said, "I was walking around my office, and Al was sitting in my chair. He dropped something on the floor and went to pick it up when the first shot rang out. We both hit the floor. There were several more shots, but we were protected by the concrete wall. All the shots entered the back of the wood door. I don't believe they went through it. If Al had not bent over, I would've lost a friend."

"What were you talking about when this started?"

"I had just come back from a weekend at home. I was telling Al how stupid I was because I made an error in judgment. Doctor Luck sent me an email directly, instead of through the normal system. I thought he wanted me to order all our medical needs personally. While I was home my wife told me that's not what the email meant. He just wanted it done quickly, not personally. I was telling Al I had written it down on my 'To Do' list for first thing in the morning."

"May we see your list?"

"Sure, take a look." Stephano handed them his list. The first item on it was to hire a medical supply specialist.

"The officer said thank you, and told Al they would need to take a statement at police headquarters in the morning."

"Officer, it already is early in the morning. Could we do it late in the afternoon after I get some sleep? I have to stay with Mister Valentino until 7 AM, when I am relieved. I may tell you I saw a three-headed goat if I have to go to your office that early."

"We will see you at 4 PM tomorrow afternoon."

"Thank you very much guys, I appreciate it."

As soon as the police left, Al said, "Why the hell did you tell him it was me?"

"If my wife thought it was me they were shooting at, she would never let me back into this building again. I will not leave this project when it's three quarters done. I don't leave a job until it's finished. You know what to say. Don't embellish the story. Keep it short and to the point, and be sure our guys know to back you up. I'll take care of everyone else. If this gets out to my wife, I'll be castrated, and then she'll take me home."

"Whatever you say Stephano, I'll take care of it."

"Thanks Al, I owe you one. You have never seen my wife when she's angry. Unfortunately, I have. I better call Doctor Luck, and tell him everything is under control now."

******************

I do not hide anything from my investors. I set up a conference call for 6 PM that day and gave them the news of the attack on Stephano's life. I advise them of deception Stephano asked us to take and the reason behind it. They agreed to keep Stephano's secret and lauded his bravery during this attack. They also gave me many ideas on how to protect our people in the building.

1.                             Blackout all the windows.

2.                             Replace the windows with bulletproof glass.

3.                             Replace the windows and put concrete in their place.

4.                             Put Kevlar and ceramic plates behind each window.

5.                             Remove the windows and put armor plate in their place.

I had Rod run everything to do with the exterior of the building through the building and zoning department, with the police department's report in his hand. They didn't care about the report and said no to each request, because it would not be aesthetically pleasing to the community.

Rod asked the head of the department if dead bodies would be aesthetically pleasing to the city.

He replied it was not his department. That was the police department's problem.

Not deterred, he called the Department of the Navy and asked them if they had any surplus armor plate from ships being dismantled.

The seamen laughed. "Do you know how much armor plating weighs?"

"It's a little bit more than 40 pounds per square foot using 1 inch armor plate."

"You look that up in the encyclopedia."

"No, I learned it school."

"How much do you want, and what sizes do you need?"

"We have 318 windows that measure 8 foot wide and 9 feet high."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 15



"Do you want any overlap on the windows?"

"That will not be necessary."

"Okay, you have 312 windows; at 72 ft.² per window; at 40 pounds per square inch. Do you have any idea how much weight you're talking about? Can your building hold this much weight?"

"I won't know until you tell me."

"Sir, the total weight is 129,162,240 pounds. If I were you I would go to the Army and ask them if they have any old tanks they are using for target practice, or selling for scrap. There armor is lighter and will still hold up against anything used on land."

"How do your ships move carrying all that weight?"

"We have very big engines sir, and our ships are able to move very fast."

"Thank you very much for your time and help. I will call the Army next."

It was late in the day and Rod decided to leave the telephone call to the Army until the next morning. When he arrived home Rosalynn knew something was wrong. She brought him an iced tea, sat in his lap, kissed him, and put her head on his shoulder. She did not utter a sound. She knew, after all the years of marriage, when he wanted to talk, he would.

"They tried to kill Stephano last night. They didn't miss by much."

"Is that why all the agents are around us today?"

"Yes it is. I don't know how long they are going to be here, but I'm worried about you and the kids. Maybe you should go home."

"Now wouldn't that be a brilliant move? Take us away from a place where we are guarded, and send us home where we have no one to take care of us. Sometimes Rodney I wonder about you. Should I put my blue panties on to remind you of why I'm still married to you?"

"No, I liked the way you showed up at the airport much better."

"I liked it too, but it was very drafty."

"How can something so hot be so cold because of a little wind?"

"I didn't say it was cold. I said it was drafty."

"I still have to figure out what to do with the windows on the building. I called the Navy today about the armor plating. I think it weighed more than the building itself. I'm going to call the Army tomorrow to see if they will sell us some of the armor from their tanks to block the windows so no one can see in."

"Honey, if you're just worried about people looking in to see who is sitting where, blackout curtains will do just fine. No one can see through them, and if you want more security, move the desk to the side of the room instead of having the persons back to the window. It's very easy to do, and very cost-effective."

Rod brought her mouth to his, while his hand slid up between her thighs. "Lady; do you know how much I love you?"

"If you take me to bed you could show me."

"I have been late getting to work every day this week because I've been showing you how much I love you."

"We only have two more weeks until the children get here. Where would you like to do it?"

"I'm going to take a shower and get rid of all this Texas dust and dirt that's on me. Then I'm going to get into the bubble bathtub. I'm going to disappear under those bubbles to see what I might discover. It could take me a very long time, but I am in no hurry. I will explore every nook and cranny that's in that bathtub."

"It sounds like a lot of fun. Where would you like me to be?"

"If you are not among the bubbles, you are going to miss a very good time."

"Well you never mentioned my name, or said the words she or her in your little dissertation, so I was wondering if I was supposed to be in bed working with my toys."

"When you and I are in the same general vicinity, you better not touch your toys, until I can no longer satisfy you. On that day I will use your toys to help stimulate your body to reach orgasms you only use to receive from me."

"Rod if that happens before your 100th birthday, I'm going to pump pills into you until you can stay erect for a month at a time. You and I will be the happiest centenarians in the world."

"Nothing would make me happier than to keep that wonderful smile on your beautiful face."

"Well there is one thing that would make you smile as bright on your hundredth birthday."

"What; have all our kids with us, happy and healthy?"

"That would be nice, but that's not what I'm thinking of."

"Okay, surprise me what would make me happier than to be with you and our children on my one hundredth birthday."

"You would love to see a 200 foot wide beach ball descend from the sky and land in our backyard. You would see Doctor Even Luck and 80 other space travelers join our party as young and healthy as the way they were when they left this earth a few years from now. They may break one of Einstein's laws of physics, but the other one, where he tells us people will not age when they are traveling at light speed will be correct."

"Are you trying to depress me? I will be 100 years old, and that moron will still be 40 years old. What a horrible thought."

"When are you going to grow up, and admit that man is your twin?"

"Listen lady, I don't want to talk about anything else at this moment. I want you into the bathtub. Stop playing with me before I take you on the table."

"You've done that already, with two of our agents watching us. I never knew you were an exhibitionist."

"I wasn't naked, you were."

"I didn't have a choice. You wanted breakfast, right after you got laid. I had to go downstairs to make it, while you fooled around up here, and attempted to get dressed for work. 

I threw on a robe, and went into the kitchen. I started the coffee, and made the batter for your pancakes. Then I started your bacon, eggs, and toast. You were very pressed for time. You took a long hot shower, shit, and shaved. You selected a shirt with the greatest of care, and a suit from your extensive collection. Then came the hardest part; selecting the appropriate tie to complete your ensemble. No, wait one second, I forgot something. What socks were you going to wear which would complement your suit, and your shoes? The shoes, are they going to be the ones with the tassels, square toe or the wingtips? What type did you wear yesterday? We must not wear the same kind of shoe two days in a row. 

Dressed in your finest, you look into the long mirror to make sure we look as handsome as the gods. Oh no, there is a piece of lint on our slacks. We cannot possibly take it off with our fingers; it will ruin the crease in our slacks. We must use the sticky tape roller. Where did we put that thing yesterday? 

'The hunt is on.' After three or four grueling minutes, hunting high and low, all over our bedroom, you find it. However, it is full of lint from yesterday, and the days prior to that. You are forced to remove the old tape, and use a new piece. Where is the garbage can? You know I will kill you if you throw the used piece into the bowl and it backs up, again. Oh yes, there it is, just to the right by the commode. Why do I always forget that?

Carefully, you aim, and throw the piece of offending tape towards the circular file. It hits the back rim, goes up into the air, and falls softly into the center of the can. You breathe a sigh of relief having completed this repugnant task successfully.

You return to the full-length mirror and look for the offending piece of lint. It was on the left side of your slacks, by the crease. You saw it. Where could it possibly have gone? You look around the entire pant leg, and you cannot find it. You know it was there. Instead of believing the evidence of your own eyes, you remove your jacket, and shirt. You lay them on my side of the bed, with the greatest of care. You remove your shoes, and put them aside. Then with the greatest of care you remove your trousers, and spread them out on the bed. With a practice eye, you survey every inch of fabric for that one piece of lint, but it is not there. You deduce with that brilliant legal mind, and wasting all nearly 30 minutes, it must have fallen off, because it was afraid of the new tape on your roller. You put on your slacks, decide you wearing the wrong shoes to complement your suit and change them in favor of the tan wingtips. You slip on your shirt, tie your tie in a half instead of a full Windsor, and slip on your jacket. Without checking yourself in the full length dressing mirror, you finally arrive downstairs, kiss me good morning, as you pass me by, and head for the breakfast table to read the morning paper.

I ask, "Did you check your jacket this morning?"

"Of course I did," you reply.

"It's full of lint; you must have of brushed up against something on your way downstairs."

You take off your jacket, because you know I have to be lying. You screech in horror when you see the back of your jacket is filled with lint. You remember you laid it down on our bed. You charged up the stairs, like a man on a mission. You put your jacket on a hanger and place it over the door backwards. Then you look for your sticky tape roller, which, as usual, you cannot find, because you didn't to put it back where it belongs. You yell to the gods above, 'I cannot go through this all over again.'

They do not answer you, because there is only one God, and you did not ask him for help.

You retrace every step you took, while you were in our room, and you do it perfectly, except for one minor error. When you put the roller on our king-size bed you threw the top sheet over it, when you laid your clothes upon it. The roller was not visible to the naked eye. 

After dissecting our room for another five minutes, you decide to sit down and rethink the problem. As soon as your ass hit the bed, you hear plastic cracking under your weight. You know immediately what you have done. You stand, move our top sheet, and there is your sticky roller, with the new tape showing. Unfortunately, it is in three pieces now. It will no longer functional properly. You curse yourself as you dab the tape across the back of your jacket, picking up pieces of lint, a few at a time. Finally, you are done. This time you remember to check yourself in the full-length mirror. Your suit is perfection. Your shirt and tie is elegance itself. Personally, I hate your shoes, but they are yours, not mine. 

Your breakfast has been sitting in the oven for 40 minutes trying to stay warm. You walk into the kitchen, with angst all over your face. I can't control my laughter. You never talk when you have a problem like this when the kids are around. Now we have this huge house to ourselves, and everything that annoys you comes out of that mouth of yours: unedited. I can't help it. I laugh uncontrollably. You remove your jacket, and place it over the back of a chair as you normally do when you eat breakfast. However, this morning you do something different. You remove your coffee cup, the centerpiece, and the newspaper from the table. You look at me like a bear looks at a salmon.

I back away from you. I know that look too well, and I'm still laughing. "No Rod, we just made love." 

He doesn't say a word. I get the table between us, to make sure there is no way he is going to catch me; at least I think so. 

He started pushing the table towards the window, and me. I pushed it back but he was too strong. If I moved to the right he would trap me in a corner. If I went to the left, I would be out in the open. If I stayed where I was he would pin me against the wall. Anyway you looked at it, I was caught, and he had this shit eating grin on his face. I did the next best thing I could think of; I jumped up on the table, and waited to see what he would do next. He didn't do anything, that bastard; he stayed still waiting for my move. I tried to jump into the laundry room, but before my feet hit the ground, he had his arms around my waist pulling me onto the table. I was screaming in defeat.

"Roz, why aren't you laughing now?"

"I will be in a moment, when you can't get it up."

"Would you like to make a wager on that?"

"No." 

He pulled the sash and opened my robe, and pulled the panels over my shoulders, trapping my arms. He bit both of my nipples, and I screamed in pain. He pushed me down onto the table and pulled the robe off my body.

I screamed, "People will see us."

"Next time you won't laugh at me?"

"Next time you will remember where you put your things?"

Naked as a Jaybird on the kitchen table, facing the street I started laughing again. I'm laughing like a loon, at my husband, who is dropping his pants and shorts, getting ready to defile me."

Rod was stiff as steel. I couldn't understand why, but I was ready for him. He didn't force himself into me, because he wasn't sure of my situation. It didn't take long for him to realize that I was as hot for him as he was for me. It always works that way for us. It's like a switch; we turn each other on anywhere we are.

We weren't going at it very long when Rod said, "Roz, we have an audience."

I screamed, "Cover me."

"It's too late now, they are applauding."

"I'm going to kill you, you bastard." Those words got lost in my mind, because moments later my world shattered. An orgasm roared through my body, and of my 'Rod' was very close behind me. He laid his body over mine, as I caressed his hair and back.

"Stay with me today, don't go to work."

"I can't do that, although your offer is very tempting. That's what the people who tried to kill Stephano want to know. How many of us can they keep from coming to work today? How many can they keep away every day? If we lose 10 or 15% of the workforce, it can put us behind by a year, or more. I won't let them think they scared me away."

"Please be super careful today."

"I am every day. I do as I am told. I will run your idea by the head of security today. If he approves it, I will have them bring you to the office so you can tell Stephano what we need. He may let you look on line to see what they are offering."

"That sounds like fun. I had no plans for today. I was going to call Jennifer to see if she'd like company, but that was all. Let me know what they say. Maybe I can get a quickie at the office."

"If I tell you to come to the office, you better be wearing panties."

"I've been tempted to buy crotchless panties; would you like that?"

"Woman, I'm not going to live to be 100 years old with you in my life."

"Of course you are, Rod. Sex is a great cardiovascular exercise."

"I'm already late for work, if I don't leave now, you're going to get laid again, and I won't get to work until after-noon today."

"Tell them you got stuck in traffic."

"What traffic? I think 18 cars use this road every day, and that's on a really busy day."

"Go to work dear, I will see you later."

"I love you Roz, don't let anyone hurt you."

"I will have my agent start teaching me how to shoot a rocket propelled grenade, and work my way up to a tank."

"Why don't you start with something smaller, like a pistol to protect yourself and the kids?"

"Wouldn't the bad guys be more afraid of the rocket propelled grenade?"

"Yes, however there is a problem with the RPG's. The rocket goes out the front, but the flames come out the back of it. Anyone standing within 20 feet of the RPG is going to get roasted."

"Okay, I'll ask for a handgun, and work up to a tank."

"God, I do love you woman. I'm going to work before I stay home for the day."

"I almost got you."

"Do you know how much I get paid per day on a $10 Million a year salary?"

"A lot of money."

"If I work 365 days a year it is $1152 a day. $5 million of that I work as Even's personal lawyer. I work less than 100 days per year. On this new job, I am working six days a week. That gives me 317 days off per year. So for the first $5 million technically I work 48 days."

"Rod if I have a hear you complain about Even's treatment of you again, I swear I will smack you. 48 days for $5 million. Get out of this house now."

"Goodbye my love."

"Kiss my ass."

"Okay." He turned me around and kissed my ass; both cheeks. He turned me around and stuck his tongue in my vagina. I grabbed his hair and told him if he did that again he was not going to work.

He stood up, and kissed me properly. He walked to the front door, opened it a few inches, and called for Steel.

Steel told him to stay where he was until the car was in position. As soon as the SUV was in front of the house, he grabbed Rod's tie and pulled him down the 3 steps and across the 50 feet of open ground. He threw Rod into the back of the vehicle headfirst, and slammed the door behind him. I believe Rod was both pissed and unnerved by the handling he received this morning. His meticulously assembled wardrobe was now rumpled beyond recognition.

I heard the front door close and lock. Lexi walked in, looked at me, and smiled.

"Roz, you had some really smooth moves on that table."

I didn't blush. "I told you the day we met my husband and I were sex addicts. It doesn't take much to get either one of us started, and the only thing that keeps us in check is our kids."

"Don't you think you should put some clothes on?"

I looked down and realized I was parading around the house naked, with Rod's semen dripping down my leg. I walked back to the table, found my robe, but didn't bother putting it on.

"I'm going to take a shower and get dressed. I'll be down in about an hour. I want to purchase a handgun, and learn how to use it properly. Would you find out what I have to do to comply with Texas law?"

"I think the only thing you have to do in Texas, to get a permit for a gun, is to be capable of breathing on your own. I'll verify that and get back to you."

My agent was incorrect. I also had to show my identification, and sign a form, also.

64. Retribution

There is one truism in this world: "You don't piss off William Zabo." 

He was walking his new son, Patrick, in his pram, when he passed a 'T Mobile' store. He asked his agent to watch Patrick for a few minutes while he checked out a new phone.

The agent agreed simply because William was going to be in a store and out of harm's way.

A sales agent asked how you might help. William told him what the problem was, and showed him his high-end phone. He asked, "May I use one of your phones to see if the reception is any better?"

"Absolutely sir."

William made a call to Leesburg, a small town in central Louisiana. The woman answered, "Central Station."

"I'm sorry ma'am my name is 'The Private', 'The Private'. I must have dialed the Incorrect Number, Wrong Number. I am in New York and I was looking for a representative in New Orleans to eliminate a problem I am having with my phone. I believe there is a higher up in my brain that is making me malfunction. 'I apologize', 'I apologize' profusely for disturbing you."

"That's perfectly all right sir, we have verified that you are in New York and your voiceprint. Your problem will be looked into, and they will be eliminated."

"Thank you very much for your 'consideration', and kind 'consideration' to this matter. I hope you have a wonderful day."

"Your worries are worries are over Private. Things will be attended to in short order."

*************

"Colonel we have received the go order."

"Is it confirmed?"

"Yes sir it is confirmed. I think you should listen to the recording. I believe we have received a change in the action plan."

"Give me a headset, and let me listen to it."

Colonel Canyon listened carefully to the message and made notes of the disjointed words William used. Bordeaux was not the tip of the spear. He was part of a conspiracy to destroy William's project. He smiled. It was no longer just a case of getting rid of a member of Congress. They were going to have some fun with him first. Oh how he loved having fun. Now he had to find a place safe enough to have it. He could not do it in the United States, because every law enforcement agency in the country would be looking for Bordeaux. Brazil was the obvious choice. It had no extradition treaty with the United States, and was so large Texas could get lost in it.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 15



"Where is the subject now?"

"He is at second base, expected to be at first base Friday evening at 6:42 PM."

"Very good, put all troops on alert for a Tuesday afternoon 2 PM drill. There has been a change in plans."

"Yes sir."

*************

"Hello Mrs. Valentino, this is Callum Robbins, you wanted to speak with me."

"Yes Callum is this a good time, or are you still in bed with Emma?"

"My mother has a very big mouth. It's amazing that my picture is not in all the newspapers, with Emma hanging all over me."

"I'm sorry to tell you this Callum, but I'm looking at a picture of both of you right now. It's the lead story on the front page of the National Observer."

"I'm going to kill that woman."

"I don't believe it was her. This looks like one of those Hollywood photographs."

"Thanks, I guess I can let her live another day. How can I help you Mrs. Valentino?"

"First, you can call me Aunt Patti like you used to when you were younger. Aunt Patti makes me feel younger than Mrs. Valentino. Second, I think you can help Laura and me with a problem we are having. We can't seem to find a way to keep people alive after two light years in stasis. Everyone says that you are great problem solver. We need a fresh outlook; a fresh pair of eyes to look at this program to see if you can solve it for us. Christian and Cassie are coming to help us with the technical side of the problem, but we need someone impartial; someone who can look at it from a non-technical side. Would you give up a few years of your life to help us?"

"Do you really think it will take that long?"

"Yes I do. Once we believe we have the problem solved, we have to find a volunteer who will be willing to go into stasis for one year to prove that the program works. It is probably the most dangerous part of our operation. Whoever accepts that challenge could suffer brain damage, failure of internal organs, and a whole host of other problems that could cause their own death. We have to be sure we are right before we put anyone into that chamber."

"Have you designed the chamber yet?"

"How could we possibly design a chamber, when we don't know what biological and technical problems we are facing?"

"I'm sorry, it was a stupid question."

"Callum the only stupid question is the question unasked. Will you help us?"

"When do you need me?"

"Could you be here in three weeks? We will send an airplane for you, if you tell us where you are."

"I thought I was the one who had a sense of humor Aunt Patti."

"You got it from your father. I lived with him for several months. I guess it rubbed off on me."

"I will be at home in three weeks."

"That's wonderful, I can pick up all three of you at one time. What kind of car would you like while you're here?"

"A Lamborghini would be nice."

"There goes your first two years' salary."

"I'm getting paid?"

"You are receiving $500,000 a year for your services, just like our scientists."

"I'd like a Ford F350, all-wheel-drive, all tricked out."

"That sounds more reasonable. It will be here when you arrive."

"Thanks Aunt Patti; I'm going to drive it home when we're finished?"

"No you're not; we will ship it to you. Your father would treat me like Callie for the rest of my life if I let you drive that beast home."

"I'm 25 years old, and I'm still living under the thumb of my old man. He must've been something else when he was younger."

"You haven't heard the stories about when the mob sent 16 men out here to kill him so he couldn't testify against them in New York."

"No one tells me anything about those years. I see the scars on his chest and his back. He quickly puts a shirt on when I ask about them."

"If you help us find the answers to our problems, I'll answer all the questions you have about your father."

"And if you're problem is unsolvable, I get no information at all, and I have no fun."

"Callum if a week in Los Angeles, with an actress named Emma, isn't fun, you had better see a psychiatrist."

"Well, she is very active in bed, but she has a brain the size of the pea."

"She was very tough to talk to after having sex for six hours."

"It was only four hours, and she fell asleep afterwards."

"I feel so sorry for you; what did you do when she was asleep?"

"I did 200 laps in her infinity pool."

"You and Stephano have got to compare notes."

"Goodbye Aunt Patti, I don't want to know about your sex life."

"Afraid you might be at the bottom of the totem pole?"

"Aunt Patti you are too much. I'll see you in three weeks."

"Thank you Callum, you will never know how much I appreciate you coming here."

*************

"The three of them are coming to help us Laura. I never expected that to happen. I thought we might get one or two of them, but never three. Callum sounds like a lot of fun. I think Cassie just wanted to get away Callie for a while. I don't know what Christian's motivation is for coming, but I believe he didn't want to be the only one left in the house besides his father. We are going to have a very eclectic group working with us. We may be able to crack this thing after all."

"Mom are you going to wear those clothes the entire time we are in Canada, or would you like to pack a bag to come with me."

"I was going to wash these every night so they would be clean in the morning. They are wash and wear."

A helicopter roared over the house, rattling the house on its foundation. It headed for one of the landing pads on the west side of the property.

"Mom if we're not there in 15 minutes, Rita and Paul will be in the hangar screwing like rabbits. We will not be out of here for hours. I don't know how they do it, but I swear they are on their backs more often than they are on their legs."

"Don't worry about them Laura, I can still fly the helicopter. I've done it before."

"You're not flying it with me inside it, I'll take my car."

"Where is your spirit of adventure. You want to go into outer space with Doctor Luck, and he doesn't have a Spaceship License."

"Do you know anyone who does?"

"No, but that's not the point. You are willing to risk your life for a man everyone calls crazy; on a spaceship that looks like a beach ball. It runs on an antigravity system that has never been tried. If you make it beyond Earth's gravitational pull, and past the planet Mars, they are going to deploy a nuclear engine of a design no one has ever tested. It was reluctantly approved by the Department of Energy, and forced down the throats of the NRC. They were so unprepared for their meeting with Delicious and Gordon, they were afraid it would become public knowledge, and a national scandal. The Commission didn't want to spend the next five years in court being embarrassed by the best lawyers in the country. They would have been shown as the most incompetent group of scientists ever assembled. Congress would close them down, and disband them.

Finally, Doctor Luck and company are going to deploy an engine that is so revolutionary most scientists have no clue as to how it works. The Ion/H2 engine is so out of the realm of scientific knowledge these scientists have been studying it since it was patented. They were allowed to see this patented material under the strictest nondisclosure agreement ever written. Although they agree that the engine 'should work in principle', they don't understand why it will work. These are the best scientific minds in the world. They are looking over plans a 17-year-old girl invented, and they can't understand how she did it. They don't want her to leave this planet. They want to know what she would discover by the time she's 30."

"Please pack a bag mother so we can get started on our trip. That was a very interesting speech, but if we can crack this problem, I'm still going."

"I know, I was just expressing my opinion. I am still allowed to do that as your mother?"

"Yes you are, and I appreciate your concern. Pack a bag please, or I will leave without you."

"You will do no such thing young lady. It is my helicopter and my airplane."

"You are correct mother." 

Laura reached into her pocketbook and pulled out a credit card.

"This is my credit card. It is attached to dad's credit card account. He said I could use it to go anywhere I wanted to go. I am going to Alberta Canada whether you like it or not. Goodbye mother."

"I hope you have a flat tire."

"I have a Road Service Contract."

"I hope your engine blows up."

"I will rent a car."

"You can't rent a car. You aren't 21."

"I have a perfect fake ID and driver's license. It says I'm 23 years old. Dad got it for me."

"I'm going to kill that rotten bastard."

"Are you coming with me mother or not?"

"I have to change and pack a bag."

"You have five minutes before I leave without you."

"I can't do everything in five minutes."

"You have four minutes and fifty seconds left."

"I should have become a nun."

"If you became a nun, you would never have been able to afford all the batteries you go through."

"That's your father's fault for being in Charleston, and none of your business."

"Do you want any help packing?"

"You stay out of my room."

"Are you packing batteries?"

"You bet your ass I am."

"I've never had anything in my ass."

"You've never lived until you have."

"Mother!!!!"

"You asked."

"Is it really that good?"

"You will have to find out for yourself little girl."

"I am not a little girl."

"You've been on the pill since you were 15 years old, and you're still a virgin."

"You got married to dad as a virgin, so don't preach to me."

"My mother made me promise to stay a virgin until I got married. I couldn't ask her to change her mind, because she was murdered when I was barely 18. It screwed up my mind royally as I got older. The three of you suffered because of it."

"You and dad seem to be randy enough in bed."

"That's none of your business."

"I didn't say it was. I was just stating a fact."

"Several people helped me free my mind about sex. Your Aunt Jemma was one. The wife of the director of the FBI is a psychologist, and she was very helpful. Then there was your father, who was very patient with me. I'm ready to go."

"Did you remember to pack underwear?"

"SHIT; I'll be right back."

"Mother you are impossible."

*************

They walked out to the helipad, and Paul and Rita were nowhere in sight.

Laura said, "I told you so."

"I am not going to fly off in the helicopter. Just get inside, and I will get both of them here in less than one minute."

"Do you swear you're not going to fly this thing?"

"Yes I promise."

Laura strapped herself into the passenger compartment, and waited.

Patti got into the pilot's seat. She did the preflight checklist, and started the engine. Once it was warm, she began revving it up to take off speed. 

Paul's head peeked out of the hanger. He saw Patti sitting in the pilot's seat he panicked. 

She waved goodbye, and smiled.

He screamed, "NO," and started running towards the helicopter. He was only wearing his socks.

Rita was completely naked as she scooped up their clothes, and ran towards the passenger compartment of the helicopter.

Patti throttled down, and turned the engine off. 

Laura was laughing as she watched both her 'uncle' and 'aunt' run naked towards her.

She had never seen a man naked, in the flesh, before, and 'it' looked funny flopping around as he ran.

Paul banged on the pilot side door. Patti opened the tiny window and asked, "May I help you sir?"

"The last time you did this you lost your memory for six weeks. If you did it again I would cut your head off with my Swiss Army knife, and your father would have approved."

"Do me a favor Paul, the next time you get angry with me, please have some clothes on. I've never seen anything so small in my life"

"If Stephano wouldn't kill me, I would show you how small it is when it's in action inside you."

"Are you going to be able to fly me to Albany, or should I restart the engine, and fly there myself?"

"Get out of your toy, because Rita and I are the only ones certified to fly it. There will be an army of police waiting to arrest you at the Albany airport if you get there."

"Who said I was going to land at the airport Paul?"

"You were always one step ahead of everyone, except your children. Get out of my helicopter before I give you piss all over the wind screen."

"I'll get out, but don't you touch me with that little thing. I've only touched one of them in my life. I want to keep that record intact."

While Paul and Patti were arguing by the front of the aircraft, Rita was in the back getting dressed with Laura's help.

"I'm going to kill your mother. I was this close to cuming, and she stole it from me."

"Aunt Rita can I ask you a question. You can't tell anyone what I asked you."

"I've known you since your mother had you in her belly. You can ask me anything, you know that."

"My mother and I were having a heated discussion this morning, and something she said confused me. She said you haven't lived, until you had it up your ass. I haven't had it in any position yet. Is it really supposed to be that good?"

Rita pulled Laura into her arms. "Listen munchkin, there is oral sex, inter-mammary sex, hand sex, feet sex, butt cheek sex, thigh sex, vaginal sex, anal sex, and so many other types of sex you will not believe the variety. Even Paul and I have not tried them all, and we have tried a lot of them. Paul has been my one and only sex partner. Don't be in a hurry to have sex. Wait for the right one. As far as what your mother said today, anal sex can be quite fulfilling. It is not as fulfilling as vaginal sex for a woman. The vagina lubricates both the man and the woman. It heightens the sensations for both of them. The ass is always dry and requires additional lubrication. Never let a man into your ass without it, because it hurts. Never let him in there, without a condom, unless you are in a stable relationship like your mother and father, or Paul and I. Remember, safe sex is the best sex. Anal sex is dangerous if you do not use a condom, and have multiple partners. The AIDS epidemic was caused by men and women having vaginal, or anal sex indiscriminately, and without the use of condoms. Does that answer your question?"

"Yes Rita, thank you, that's what I needed to know. I think you should let Paul in; otherwise he is going to catch a cold. If his face gets any redder, he really is going to kill my mother."

"Do you want to get out with me, or do you want an education on the male organ?"

"I've been watching it flip up and down while he was running here. It looked quite large and quite funny."

"That part of Paul is not supposed to be used while he is running. He gets much larger when he's excited; all men do. Women stretch to accommodate the men in their lives. You must remember babies come out of the vagina, and if a baby can come out, a penis can go in."

"Thanks Rita, I think I'll go for a walk with you."

"Chicken!"

"No, you said to pick my own man. Paul is taken."

"You're right. You go out the left side; I'll let Paul in the right side. When he's in, I'll meet you, and we will go for a short walk."

********

The yelling and laughing that went on between Paul, Rita, Laura, and Patti as they flew from Glen Falls to Albany would fill a good-sized book. Unfortunately, it was a short trip, and by the time they landed next to their jet aircraft, all was forgiven. They hugged each other, but Patti had to leave them with one more jab.

"If you two are not here on time, when we get back, the five of us are going to parachute down over the ranch. If that happens, I'm taking my helicopter away from you, and I am going to get my license to fly it. You know I can do it, so don't mess with me."

"If you touch my helicopter, I'm going to put termites into your computer. Don't mess with me Patti, because I will do it."

"My computer is insured Paul, your job isn't."

Laura said, "I'm sorry Uncle Paul, but that is Checkmate'."

"She always has to have the last word? That's why we've hated working for her every for the last 23 years. She lets us fly her jet, every once in a while, but not enough to get our license to fly it alone. Every time we get close, she sells it, and buys a different type of aircraft, just to confuse us. I've never hated anyone so much in my entire life. We'd leave, but the health benefits are too good."

Patti laughed. "Except for your yearly flight physicals, when was the last time either of you went to the Doctor?"

Rita replied, "I had a mammogram."

"The way Paul handles your breasts he would've noticed any lumps before you did."

"How about you Paul, have you gone to the Doctor for any reason?"

"No, but next year I have to have a pipe shoved up my ass, because I turned 50."

Patti laughed. "I have that instrument in the barn. I use it on the horses. I will do it to you for free. You won't need sedation. Laura will hold onto your tiny dick. Rita will grab hold of your balls to keep you still. I will shove that 2 inch pipe up your ass so far you will choke."

"If I can do it to you first, you can do it to me."

"I would need sedation. There's nothing to hold on to if you remember what the front of a female looks like."

"I don't like you Patti."

"I don't like you either Paul. Have a safe flight back to Glen Falls."

***************

Patti and Stephano had always purchased smaller private jets, but it always turned out that they had more family members and friends who wanted to go with them then they could accommodate. The price difference between a Grumman 650 and a Boeing 757 was so insignificant they purchased the larger aircraft. They had it set up as a first-class cabin that could accommodate 46 people and much more if they decided to take more people onboard. Although 757s were designed to carry up to 210 people to a range of 4100 miles, with only 46 people, plus 10 crewmembers on board, it could travel at Mach .8, for 7000 miles or more. It equaled the range of the Grumman, but was slower, and had to fly lower. As far as comfort was concerned the 757 had the Grumman beat by a mile.

Today's flight, from Albany to Edmonton would cover 2000 miles, and take 4 hours and 30 minutes. 

The two of them felt lost in this giant aircraft. Laura called Anna to see how she was doing on her final exams. Instead, she got an ear full about her new boyfriend. Anna told her he was a real Southern Gentleman. His only flaw was he kept trying to head further south than she was used to, and was attempting to get into her pants. She told her sister he was so wonderful, he was getting very close to being successful.

Laura screamed, "Don't you dare do that at the end of a semester. You will have your Master's Degree, and never see him again. If he doesn't ask you to marry him, and put a ring on your finger, tell him to go fuck himself, and not you."

"Laura, he's gorgeous. I have to lose it to someone, why not him?"

"Baby sister, listen to me. How many other girls have said the same thing before losing their virginity to him? How many other women has he been in bed with before you? Think how dangerous it's going to be? Are you going to tell him to use a condom or is it going to be skin to skin. What diseases does he have? What is he going to give you that you will carry for a lifetime? I just had the sex talk with Aunt Rita today. She didn't try to scare me away from sex. She just told me to be smart about it. That's all I'm asking you to do; 'BE SMART.' Think before you jump; PLEASE! I don't want you to get hurt. It would kill me if you do."

"If mom and I were having this conversation I would have turned a deaf ear to her. She always bosses us around, and tries to keep us in line. I'm glad it's you, because I will think about what you said. What else did Aunt Rita say?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 16



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me, during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

68. More Problems

"Delicious, this is Junie Penick. I'm in big trouble, help me please."

"What happened, the trial is supposed to start today."

"The judge gave the prosecutor a one day delay to start the trial. The two men who were going to testify against my father have disappeared. He told me without them he has no case."

"Where are you now Junie?"

"I'm in my hotel room."

"Are you being watched?"

"Yes by two men. There never more than a few yards away from me."

"Is there a store where you can buy women's clothing nearby?"

"Yes."

"Go there, and look around. Call the police and tell them those two men are harassing you. When the police get there tell them everywhere you go these two men follow you. They will either be arrested or told to get lost. Can you get a bundle of cash in a hurry?"

"Yes, the court made sure I had access to all the funds I needed."

"What is the closest airport to you?"

"Harrisburg."

"Go there and take the first plane out. I don't care where it goes just go. Those two men are dead. They will never be able to testify against your father. Throw your cell phone away when you get to your destination. Call me on one of those prepaid phones. I will have instructions for you when you get there."

"Delicious, I don't know how to thank you."

"You can thank me by moving your ass now."

"What about my clothes?"

"What's more important Junie, your clothes or your life?"

"I'm leaving now, thank you again."

*************

"Rod, Junie Penick is in trouble."

"She can't be; I spoke to the prosecutors last week; they said it was slam dunk case."

"It was a slam dunk case if those two guys could testify against her father. They're dead; at least I think they are. They didn't show up at court this morning."

"They're dead. Where is she now?"

"I have her on the move. There are two men following her. She will lose them when the police get to her, which shouldn't be too long from now.

She will be flying out of Harrisburg on the next available flight. She will call me when she gets to her destination. What can we do for her now?"

"The best person to answer that question would be Dan. Let me go to him, and see what he thinks we should do."

"Keep me informed please, I feel frightened for her."

****************

After explaining everything to their security chief, Rod asked, "What do you think Dan? How can we help a girl that's been fucked over all her life?"

"That's the easiest question I have ever had put to me, 'You get rid of that fucker'."

"I didn't hear that, and you're not going to say it again."

"You lawyers are always squeamish. She's leaving town today?"

"Yes."

"When she makes contact have her call the prosecutor's office and tell him where she is. She's going into hiding, because her father will try to find her and put her back into that prison. She took some money out of the bank. She is going as far away as it will take her. Thank them for their help, and say goodbye. We will have instructions for her to follow from that point on."

"Whatever you say Dan; you are the expert in these matters; just don't tell me what you're doing."

****************

Dan sat back in his chair; put his hands behind his head and thought, "I wonder who's in charge of the 'Army War College' in Carlisle?"

He brought it up on his computer and laughed. "They gave that dunce a star. I thought he was overrated as a Lieutenant Colonel. What is this Army coming to?" He dialed the number.

"Army War College switchboard how may help you?"

"This is General Dan Morgan for General Fleming please."

"General Fleming's office, this is Margaret. How may I help you?"

He recognized the voice instantly. She was a New Englander, before there was a New England.

"How does anyone understand you Margaret? How do you say Massachusetts again?"

"Dan, I had them retire you because of your insults to my heritage. Why are you bothering me at this time of day? I'm supposed to be taking my beauty rest?"

"Okay, I'll call back at the end of the next century."

"That wasn't nice Dan. I will get even with you."

"How about a job that pays four times as much as you are making now. You can get away from that numb skull you working for too."

"You got that right. I've never seen anyone quite like him in my life. How did he get to be a general officer?"

"I guess he kissed the right asses. I don't think he ever went into battle. Hell, I don't think he left the northern hemisphere."

"He didn't; I checked. Can I help you or do you want to speak to idiot face."

"What I'm about to ask you could get your fingers dirty all the way up to your shoulders."

"It's not like I haven't done that for you before."

"Do you have the names of two black ops people in the area?"

"Only two; hell they're all over the hills here in Pennsylvania."

"I need two long-range marksman to call me at this number on throwaway phones; 10 grand cash each; by courier one target. One armor piercing shell and one gallium shell."

"I'll get on it right now Dan."

"Your new job is in the southwest I hope you like it hot."

"You should be very glad I'm already past my retirement age. I can collect my pension, and beat the shit out of you, because you're so damn ugly."

"God dammit Margaret what did you just say?"

"You will hear me loud and clear when I drop my typewriter on your head."

"What the hell is a typewriter?"

"It's the thing that's attached to the computer."

"It's called a keyboard Margaret."

"Whatever, I have calls to make; leave me alone Dan. You've ruined my day."

"Yes, but you love me anyhow."

"You should've married me. We could have argued like this every day."

"God forbid, I might have wound up talking like you. I might have even understood what you were saying."

"We could start a school."

"That would be perfect. We could sell it to the Army as a new form of code. The Russians would never be able to break it, and the poor Chinese would go crazy trying to find out what language it is."

"I think you better stop now Dan. You are wearing out your welcome."

"I'm just telling you the truth."

"Your coffee is going to taste very funny in the morning, because I'm going to pee in it."

"Is that what's been missing from my coffee. I knew it tasted different. I just couldn't put my finger on it. I love you Margaret; go to work."

"I love you too shit face, and it wasn't me. It was Charlotte. Goodbye"

****************

"Stephano where is Patti?"

"She's in Canada playing with Wood Frogs."

"After all these years you've developed a sense of humor."

"Honestly, Patti and Laura are in Canada playing with Wood Frogs. Well they're not really playing with them, they're studying them. They're trying to find out how they survive Arctic winters without freezing to death, and thawing out in the spring without damaging any of their cells."

"It sounds like a nice hobby."

"It's not a hobby. It is part of the stasis project they're working on. Why do you need Patti?"

"Junie Penick is in trouble. We are looking for a place to hide her for a while. The men that were supposed to testify against her father have suddenly disappeared. We believe they're dead. If her father is freed by the court tomorrow, he will move heaven and earth to find her. The first place he'll look is down here. He'll never think to look in Glen Falls. She has no connection there."

"Rod if she can get to Albany, we can have our helicopter pick her up and fly her home. We have a cook that lives in the house next door. Sabrina can let her into the main house, until Patti and Laura get home. She'll be as snug as a bug in a rug.

Wait, don't send her to Albany it's too close. Send her to New York City, or Westchester County; our helicopter will pick her up at either of those locations. Her father will never know where to look for her."

"Wonderful thinking Stephano; we will get the word to her. Her problems may not be solved, but they'll be greatly reduced."

*****************

Junie walked out of the lingerie store and pointed the two men out to the police officers.

"These two men have been following me everywhere I go. I go to my room at the hotel and they are there. I leave my hotel and go to the court, and they are right behind me. I came here this morning to buy some lingerie, and they are standing by the window looking at me. The two men that were supposed to testify in court today didn't show up. I think they're dead. I don't know if these men did it or not, but I'm afraid for my life. Can you do anything about it?"

One officer pulled his gun, while the other officer said, "Place your hands against the wall, spread your fingers, walk back three steps, and spread your feet as wide as you can. Are you carrying any weapons, or anything that could stick my hands, like needles or knives?"

Both men said, "Yes."

"My partner has his gun pointed at you. One false move and you are dead. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

Each man had two guns on him: one in his shoulder holster and another strapped around his ankle.

"I'm going to remove your jacket," he said to the man on the left. Bend your left knee, until it touches the ground. Move your left arm 90° to the side. Don't move it any further or I will break it."

After he successfully removed the jackets from both men, he called for backup. When the sergeant arrived he asked, "What do we have Rudy?"

"What we have Sarge is a walking pharmacy. In my opinion, these men were about to kidnap Miss Penick. They've been following her around for several days from her hotel room to her every destination: courthouse, dinner, and now her lingerie store, which is where she called us from.

They have hypodermic needles, sleeping pills, heroin, and an assortment of medications to get her high and low, until she was addicted and had to obey them."

"Did you mirandize them?"

"I have not asked them any questions. Miss Penick can verify that."

"That's correct sergeant, the only thing the officer has done is search them. I told him I feared for my life, and apparently I was correct."

"You certainly were Miss Penick. You are very lucky woman. You've got a great bust Rudy. Mirandize them, and don't ask them anything until we have them at the station."

"You have the right to remain silent...."

"Miss Penick you are going to have to come with us and make a statement."

"I know the drill sergeant, but instead of doing this twice or three times can you have the district attorney be there also."

"I'll call and ask if he's available."

************

Even with the district attorney present it took less than 45 minutes for Junie to give her statement, be cross-examined, and try to be picked apart as any defense attorney would attempt to do in court. It just wouldn't work, because everything that happened to her was so cut, and dry. The disheartening part was her father's lawyers would use every tactic available to delay the next trial, as they did this one. It could take another 2 to 3 years to bring her father to trial, even if these two men agreed to testify against him. If they did, there was always the possibility they could disappear. She would have to live her life hiding from him forever, and never know if she was safe.

She decided to go with Delicious plan. As soon as she left the police station, she took a cab to a local mall, and disappeared into it. She had a salad and looked around to see if anyone was watching her.

She purchased a carry-on suitcase and some traveling clothes, using her credit card. Then she went to the Harrisburg airport, and two hours later she was on her way to Allentown Pa.

She called the district attorney and told him where she was, and what she was doing. The only thing he told her was she should have taken more cash with her.

She thought about that for a moment and agreed with him. There was a branch of her bank at the airport. She filled out a check for $10,000, walked up to the teller, and presented it, with her check-cashing card and her driver's license as identification. Ten minutes later, she walked out of the bank, with her handbag a little heavier, and a smile on her face.

She went to a kiosk and bought a throwaway phone. She called Delicious to find out what she should do next.

Delicious didn't know whether to be furious or exultant when she heard Junie's voice. "Are you all right; what the fuck happened to you! What took you so long, we've been dying here."

"I'm sorry it took so long, but a lot happened since we talked."

Junie went through everything that transpired and when she finished Delicious said, "Holy shit, you were lucky."

"That's what the sergeant said to me."

"Junie can you see a departure board?"

"Yes I can."

"What is the next departure you can make?"

"There is a plane to Baltimore that leaves in 45 minutes."

"Junie we want you to go north, not south."

"You didn't tell me that before. There's a flight to LaGuardia in 90 minutes."

"That's perfect, take that one. We will have a helicopter there to pick you up. A woman will have a sign for the July Tulip Festival. Her name is Rita. Ask her what her husband's name is. It's Paul, if she says anything else, find a police officer, and call me. Okay?

"Thanks Delicious, isn't it weird how the world moves people around? I never thought we would be friends."

"Well we are. Now take the chip out of your old cell phone and break it. Throw the phone away and keep the throw away. I will talk to you when you're on the helicopter."

*****************

Paul and Rita were on the ground at Westchester waiting for further instructions. They were in the passenger compartment when the phone rang.

Paul struggled to say, "Hello."

Stephano laughed. "One day I am going to put cameras in the helicopter so we can see what goes on in there when you two are alone. How long does it take both of you to clean up that place when you are finished?"

"It doesn't take us as long as it takes us to get it messy."

"I'm going to have the Department of Health check it for suspicious microbes and see what they come up with."

"Unless you have something for us to do, can Rita and I get back to what we were doing. It's a lot more fun than talking to a grouch."

"You weren't shot at Paul. Shit you didn't hear that from me, do you understand. If Patti gets wind of that, you two are fired. That is not an empty threat. If she even mentions it to me you two are fired. Tell me you understand and you will never mention a word not even to the person who sucking your dick."

"She's not sucking my dick, she sucking my balls. I understand what you're saying. I want to hear all about it. Is that a deal?"

"No it is not a deal. You have heard all your hearing about it."

"You're getting as bitchy as your wife."

"Be at LaGuardia Airport for a 9:15 PM arrival US airlines flight 5104 from Allentown. Have Rita carry a sign saying 'July Tulip Festival.' Junie will ask Rita for her husband's name. She will answer with your name. Anything else and she will go to the police. Clean up the fucking helicopter before you leave Westchester. I don't want it smelling like a whorehouse."

"Would I do that to you and Patti?"

"Do you want me to answer that honestly?"

"No, I'll let that pass."

***********

As Rita entered LaGuardia's control zone she told them they were picking up a passenger from US Air 5104 and wanted to know if it was on time.

LaGuardia Tower informed her that 5104 was 8 miles out on final approach.

"LaGuardia Tower is there any place I can set our helicopter down close to the aircraft and have a 'Follow Me' take my copilot to pick up our passenger and bring her back here. It would save us about an hour if you can."

"Roger, land at gate 61 Hotel Hotel, a 'Follow Me' and police car will be there waiting for you."

"Thank you Tower." Shit I need something to write the sign on.

"Don't worry about it Rita. After we land I'll use the black marker and write it on your shirt."

"Are you out of your mind, this is a $90 shirt."

"Your shirt is white. My shirt is black. What shirt do you think a black marker is going to show up better on?"

"Mister, you are going to owe me so big for this."

"Send Stephano a bill for the shirt."

"You don't want to play around anymore?"

"That's not the point. You can get the money back from Stephano, and we can still play around."

"I can tell you're getting old; you're getting sneaky too."

"Watch out with this getting old stuff, I'm not 50 yet."

"LaGuardia Tower this is 333 Sierra Papa Victor, over the Whitestone Bridge."

"Papa Victor, have you insight, cleared to land 61 Hotel Hotel.

"Sierra Papa Victor is cleared to land gate 61 Hotel Hotel. Thank you."

She approached the landing area, saw the 'Follow Me' truck, and police car waiting for them. She set the helicopter down, and went through the shutdown procedure. Paul had the marker in his hand and was ready to write on her chest when Rita yelled, "Wait, I have to put my bra on."

First they had to find it. She put the cabin lights on and after a few seconds she realized Paul was sitting on it. She pulled it from underneath him, and turned off the cabin lights. She took her blouse off, smacked Paul's hand away from her breasts, and managed to get it on without any further interference from him. She put her blouse on and said, "Okay, write away."

"Your blouse is on inside out and backwards."

"Fuck, you couldn't tell me that a couple seconds ago."

She pulled her arms in, twisted her blouse around, and pushed her arms back out.

"Are we happy now?"

"Let me check?"

He leaned forward and kissed both her breasts.

"Yes, I'm happy now."

"Paul, there's her airplane. Start writing please."

He did and she was off.

She climbed into the Follow Me truck and the driver saw the writing on her chest. "Where is this festival? I want to go to it if all the advertising is on a chest like yours."

"It definitely is an attention getter; but I'm here to pick up a friend and bring her to her family's home. The festival is just north of Lake Champlain. It's one heck of a drive from here, but it's much easier by helicopter."

"Do you own the helicopter?"

"I wish. It's a beautiful thing to fly, but the repairs on it would kill me. Are you going to wait for me or is another 'Follow Me' going to take me back?"

"Is your friend as pretty as you?"

"She is much younger and much prettier than I am, but I don't think she's wearing this type shirt."

"It doesn't matter, I think I'll wait."

The police officer escorted her through the restricted area up into the concourse where flight 5104 had just finished docking. The first-class passengers disembarked, followed by the hordes of others who were sitting in coach.

Rita was beginning to worry she missed Junie, until this strikingly beautiful young woman walked up to her.

"Hi, I think I know you, what is your husband's name?"

"My husband's name is Paul. I've been waiting for you. I thought I'd missed you. This police officer will escort us downstairs. Our helicopter is waiting to take you home."

"Thank you very much; I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders."

***************

It was 12:30 AM when they landed in Glen Falls. The lights were on in the main house and the horses were out grazing in the fields. She looked at them roaming around free and it made her smile."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 16



"I may be as free as they are," she thought.

As she entered the main house Sabrina embraced her. "Welcome Miss Junie; Mister Stephano wants you to feel like a member of the family. Anything you wish ask for it, and it is yours. Any horse you choose to ride is yours. The pool is heated and is there for your pleasure. There are bathing suits, with tags still on them, in the girls' closets. I have your room all set up. There are computers you can use. Are you hungry? I can make you anything you want within 30 minutes. Why don't you take a bath and soak your weary bones while I cook."

"Poached eggs on toast with a little jam would be wonderful. I will take you up on that bath. I want to get the grime of those men off my body. Is 30 minutes okay with you?"

"30 minutes will not do anything for your body. Make it an hour, and I will have everything ready for you. What type of tea would you like?"

"How did you know it would be tea?"

"Call it an educated guess."

"My favorite is a very rare type called 'Zen My Cha." Very few people have even heard of it."

"Miss Junie, you and Anna are going to be fast friends. That is her favorite tea. She called from school to make sure we had it in the house. I will start brewing some as soon as you get out of the bath."

"I think I'm going to love being here. I think I would love being anywhere my father isn't."

"Stop thinking about him; he is your past. Mister Stephano wants you to think about your future. Take your bath, I'll show you where the towels are, and get you a nightgown."

*****************

69. The Interview

Dan was not happy about the advanced advertising that aired on Saturday. The news that Gordon had patented the first commercially usable Nuclear Fusion Power System had caused quite a stir. It was a breakthrough of such enormous importance not only were stations from around the country waiting for this interview, there was a worldwide hook up waiting to hear what he had to say.

He sent us to Austin in force. Eight SUV's with four men in each car. Every agent was heavily armed and wearing bulletproof equipment from head to toe.

Our cars shifted positions every few miles so no one from the air could track any particular car, or know which one Gordon or I were in. He would not allow anyone else to accompany us. It was much too dangerous, and we were out on an open highway for much too long.

Gordon was dressed in his best, and he was very unhappy with the makeup woman when she started applying this stuff on him. I had to tell him to sit still, or he would look like a ghost on television.

"Would you sit out there with me, dad? I am really nervous."

"What is there to be nervous about? You are going to be sitting out there with a physicist, and a moderator. You know what you did to break the code. Don't tell him what you did, because that is patented information. Tell him how you went about doing it. Tell them how you were restricted to your room, because of your bad behavior. You had no paper or computer. You wrote most of your formula on your walls. You took pictures of it, and completed it at the office in front of the entire staff the first day you were allowed to go back to work. You had to paint your room the following day, so your mother wouldn't kill you if she saw what you had written on her clean walls. You will get a nice laugh out of that story, and the interview will go on from there. This will not be anything like you encountered at the NRC.

The professor from the University of Texas will ask you probing questions to make sure you know what you did and how you went about doing it. The moderator will be more interested in how you became so knowledgeable, at such an early age.

You will do just fine, and remember if you need me just look up. I will be on the side of the stage looking at you. Do you feel better now?"

"Yes dad, you always make me feel stronger than I really am."

A young woman popped her head into the room and said, "It's time to head to the stage."

"Come on Gordon, I'll go with you."

The young woman led us through the corridors and onto the brightly lit stage. I saw the physicist being shown the remote controlled cameras. We made eye contact, and we both laughed.

Gordon asked, "What's the matter dad?"

"You are about to meet one of my professors Gordon."

"Really, was he nice?"

"He still owes me five dollars."

"Please don't remind him of that now."

"I won't, I promise."

We walked out on the stage, and I extended my hand.

"Hello Doctor Wakefield, how are you?"

"I should have known there could not be two people with that same last name and could not be father and son. How are you Even; how is your spacecraft coming?"

"Are you busy after this interview today?"

"I have nothing pressing to do if that's what you're asking me."

"Would you like to join us in Temple for a few hours? I will show you some things that will advance science one hundred years."

"Your son has already done that with Fusion, but I'd love to see your spacecraft."

"Consider yourself invited Professor, and you can stay as long as you'd like."

"I will never turn down an invitation as gracious as yours Even."

"Professor, you don't have to go easy on Gordon; he knows his stuff as well as I did in class. He knows math better than 95 percent of the people on this planet, probably 99 percent. Sometimes he is faster than IBM's Big Blue in doing calculations. He will make this interview very interesting for the world and for you."

"I'm glad to hear that Even. What do you have to say Gordon? Are you going to be okay out here?"

"Doctor Wakefield, after listening to you and my father, I am very comfortable. I will be fine with anything you wish to ask me."

"Places everybody, places please."

"I will see you after the show Even; otherwise I'll hold your son hostage, until I see your incredible flying machine."

"It's not my flying machine professor, it's our flying machine. Gordon has as much to do with it as I do."

"Come on Gordon, let's go talk science."

For the next uninterrupted 60 minutes, that's what they did. The station was inundated with calls from the networks to keep the interview going, because overseas networks wanted to hear more about it. The station extended the program to two hours. They talked about the fear factor of Nuclear Fusion; its safety issues, and nuclear waste. Finally, they talked about how this new energy source would change the world.

When Doctor Wakefield was finished asking questions, he and the moderator stood up, applauded Gordon for his depth of knowledge, not only of Nuclear Fusion, but of every technical matter they had discussed.

When the program was over, the producer ran out on the stage as happy as anyone in television had ever been. He screamed, "We topped the Super Bowl; we topped the Super Bowl ratings. My little station is on the map. We have to throw a party."

Dan said, "We are leaving. My team is ready, and we are getting on the road now. It has been our pleasure to be here, but we were supposed to be out of here an hour ago. My timing is all fucked up and someone could have set a trap by now. Let's get going Even."

"We are taking Doctor Wakefield with us. Don't bother arguing with me Dan, he's coming."

"Welcome aboard Doctor; Even will instruct you on the rules as we go. You will follow them."

"I think I will follow the rules Even."

Gordon said, "Doctor Wakefield, I'll take one hand, my dad will take the other, and we will pull you along with us. You will be just fine."

"Thank you Gordon, I believe I will be."

Eight SUVs left the grounds of the television station in Austin, and sped on to Interstate 35 North at 80 miles per hour. We changed positions regularly for the next 68 miles until we reached Temple. We left the highway and went by an alternate route to the NEST.

Dan never lets us use the same route to the site two days in a row. It wasn't that he was superstitious, he was cautious in the extreme.

No one was working today, except the guards on duty, and there were plenty of them.

When we stopped in front of the hanger doors and Gordon didn't reach for the door handle, Doctor Wakefield asked him if he needed help.

"Doctor, we never touch the doors. It's part of our protocol. We don't move until the all clear is given. Then the agents open the doors for us. We get out of the car and move quickly into the hanger, or whatever building we are going into. We are never exposed for more than eight seconds."

"It's that dangerous Even?"

"There have been two attempts to capture or kill members of my family or my team. I won't let that happen. They attempted to kidnap or kill Gordon, my daughter Delicious, and her new husband Grayson.

Then they attempted to kill Stephano Valentino, who is both a major benefactor, and in charge of all the purchasing for this project. These people believe cutting off the head, will kill the snake. They may be right, so I am not going to let that happen.

Let me take you behind the wall and show you what this is all about."

***************

"Holy shit, it's done, the outside is completed Even?"

"Except for the mouse ears, it's done."

"Give me a break Even, mouse ears?"

"That's what we call them. All our scientific equipment is going to fold out on gantries, which will lie against the surface of our Beach Ball. Our problem was most of those items are metal, and could not withstand the heat of penetrating our atmosphere as we increase our speed. Doctor Thyme came up with a brilliant idea, which Gordon improved upon; Mouse Ears.

Covering the instrumentation with the same composite materials we are using for the main body of the spacecraft, all the instruments will fold up against the sides and lock in place. Gordon came up with the idea of using millimeter wavelength radar, instead of a rotating radar dish. It eliminated an addition form of radiation from trying to penetrate our ship. We will have one on both sides of the spacecraft looking for friends, and problems."

"You're expecting to find friends?"

"You expect us to be alone in this universe?"

"Where are you going?"

"Where are we going? Ask Gordon, he is our navigator."

"Professor, the most promising planet is Kepler 298D. If, as we get closer, it turns out not to be as good or as promising as it looks from here, we can change course and go to Tau Ceti or Kepler 62E. They are all in the same general area and 11 light-years away."

"That's still a very long way to travel. You're going to be sleeping a long time."

"Do you want to tell him dad, or do you want me to do it?"

"You do it Gordon. Your science is all worked up now."

"Doctor Wakefield, we believe with the use of the Fusion engines still engaged, we will be able to go beyond light-speed by at least a factor of four, and possibly more.

According to our research, the ship will form a warp bubble around it, where time and space will bend around us. Einstein didn't have the computers we have now to do these advance computations. However, everything we've done, so far, points to the conclusion we are correct. If it is, we won't have to sleep very long."

"If you two are right, send me an email."

"It will take a very long time to get to you."

"What the hell do I care? You send me the message and I will disseminate it to the world. One of my students will have broken one of the basic laws of science, and proved that Albert Einstein was wrong. You can go faster than the speed of light. E= MC2 is wrong! Can we go inside?"

"No, not yet; they haven't finished putting in the sub-flooring for the first floor. We are three years ahead of schedule, and the way Dycke Schneider's engineers and architects have designed everything, it is going together faster than anyone could ever imagine. He and his team have done fabulous work for us."

"You can't see one seam anywhere on the exterior of the craft. It is perfectly round. How will you know if the legs go up properly?"

"There will be a lot of praying going on, plus we have a very large net that will hold up our 'Ball' as we do it the first time."

"It is a very sensible precaution."

********************

70. Another Day

Mike this street is too narrow to do it the way we were asked. It would have to be a ground level shot as they are accelerating. It's too easy to miss, too many innocent bystanders and too easy to get caught. If we don't get him the first time, he will hole up in his mansion, and let his hound dogs find her. Do you know anyone who has a 50 caliber machine gun?"

"Sorry PJ, I sold my last one two weeks ago to Mickey Mouse. It seems Goofy kept stepping on his tail."

"You've developed a sense of humor; when did that happen. Don't tell me; I don't want to become depressed. We have to get him before he gets home, otherwise its game over."

They kept studying the Google map around the courthouse trying to find an angle they could shoot from, and escape with impunity.

"Mike look at this. It would be a hell of a shot, but it would be real cute if we could pull it off."

"You're out of your fucking mind."

"It's only 522 yards, with very little wind, because it's blocked by the buildings. The best part is its two kill shots. Yours will get disfigured because it will go through him and hit the concrete column directly behind him. They'll be nothing left of your bullet for them to examine. Mine will take out his heart, because the General said he never had one. From where we are on top of this building, our shots go through the church belfry on either side of the bell. No one is going to be able to see us, and that bell hasn't moved in 40 years."

"I think it's time for us to go zero in our rifles at 530 yards."

"So you think it'll work?"

"I don't have a better idea at this minute. If it fails they'll pull him back inside the courthouse, while we get out of town and think of something else. I'd like to go to Alaska and do some moose hunting this year. Ten grand would just about pay for it."

"Okay, but don't forget to change the batteries in the laser range finders."

***************

"I'm sorry Your Honor; the two men who were supposed to testify against Mister Penick in the rape of his daughter have disappeared and are presumed to be dead. You have read the transcripts of their depositions and if anyone deserves to be in jail Mister Penick does. Unfortunately, there are no other witnesses alive to testify against him, except his daughter.

Yesterday, there was another attempt by employees of Mister Penick to kidnap her. They were heavily armed and carried hypodermic needles and other narcotics to keep her under control while they held her captivity. They have agreed to testify against Mister Penick for an offer of leniency from my office. If you will give us a continuance of 60 days we will be able to bring Mister Penick to justice."

"Your honor the defense protests vehemently. We have not been served with any paperwork on these two supposedly witnesses. The law requires you to vacate this case and free Mister Penick of all charges. If the district attorney wants to refile these false charges against my client he can do so at another time. He has wasted the courts money and the city's valuable resources against one of its most influential citizens. The supposed victim isn't here today to watch these proceedings. What was she so afraid of that she would not come to a place where justice is handed out equally? We demand that the court find Mister Penick not guilty of all charges against him."

"Mister Swansea, you should be very thankful we are in a court of law. Otherwise I would tell you exactly where to go, what to do, and how far up to shove it. I have tried over 8700 cases of rape in my time on the bench. I have never seen one so simple to adjudicate in my entire life. I will not continue speaking simply because I do not want to prejudice the next judge, who will hear the case against Mr. Penick. Get that sonofabitch out of my courtroom before I explode. This case is dismissed, without prejudice."

The press covering the Penick rape trial stormed outside the building in an attempt to get an interview. The police cordoned off an area between the courts doors and the limousine waiting to whisk him away. Microphones were set up for him to make a statement, but he walked right by them. He waved his hands, and smiled.

Mike fired the armor-piercing bullet that crashed through the wall of Cyrus Penick's chest, tore out his spine, and lodged in the column behind him. PJ fired the gallium bullet a millisecond later. It went through Penick's sternum, burst the left ventricle of his heart, and dissolved into a gelatinous mass.

Cyrus Penick was dead before he hit the floor

The police looked towards the bell tower for the shooters. They charged towards the church and surrounded it.

210 yards further away, on the top of an office building, Mike and PJ broke down their rifles, and put them into their suitcases. They picked up the brass casings, and looked for any disturbing marks they might have left on the roof. They walked down one flight of stairs to the eight floor of the building, and took the elevator to the garage level. They got into Mike's car and drove away from the area in their suits, just as any executive would do, during an ordinary business day.

Their money was delivered, by courier, four days later.

************

Sabrina heard the news of Penick's death at 12:30 PM, while she was watching television. She decided not awaken Junie; it was more important that she rest. She called Stephano to let him know what happened.

"Don't leave her alone Sabrina. This could go one of two ways for her. She could be extremely happy, or she could become extremely depressed. Call Paul and Rita and have them come over to the ranch. She is going to need company for a while. Are you okay with that?"

"Of course Mister Stephano, I'll do whatever I can to help her."

"Help me with what Sabrina?"

"Good afternoon Miss Junie, would you like your tea now?"

"Yes please Sabrina, what were you going to help me with?"

"Why don't you sit down, while I begin making your tea, then I'll tell you everything that happened this morning."

As she placed the tea on the table Sabrina held Junie's hands.

"The judge dismissed the case against your father, as you predicted. He left the courthouse smiling and waving to the crowd. There were two shots, and he was killed instantly. Miss Junie, I thought telling you this way was in your best interest."

Junie sat for a moment not saying a word or moving a muscle. Sabrina did not let her go. She was unsure how Junie was going to react.

Junie looked up towards the heavens. "Thank you God, thank you mom, thank you for answering my prayers." She put her hands on the table, rested her head on them, and cried.

Sabrina let her cry; she had earned every tear.

A hearty lunch was in order. A tossed salad, a steak, and homemade French fries would be just what the doctor ordered. She began working on it as the phone rang.

Without answering it Sabrina said, "It's for you Miss Junie."

"Hello."

"Junie, it's Delicious, are you okay?"

"Delicious I have not felt this good since the last time I played with my mother. I'm not going back there. They can burn the place down for all I care. I will never step foot in that house again. Can you ask your lawyer to take care of everything for me again? Rod was so nice to me and so very helpful. I'll pay him whatever he wants to get rid of it for me."

"I am sure Rod will do it. He is the best lawyer ever. All you have to do now is rest, relax, and recover. You're going to have a lot of company soon. You are going to have a lot of fun too, because they're all our age.





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 16



I just remembered we own a railroad. Isn't that weird? I've never been on a train in my life. What does it feel like?"

"They are noisy, bumpy, and profitable."

"I like the last part."

"Most people like the last part. Some people like it too much, and they get very greedy. When will I get to see you again?"

"We will fly you down here in about a month; is that okay?"

"That will be great, I'll see you then. Goodbye Delicious and thank you so much for your help."

"It was great to help you out of such a terrible existence."

********

"Congressman you don't want to start your speech with a flourish. This is a dreadful day for the nation, and for you.

You are the Chairman of the House Intelligence Committee. What you uncovered caused you such grief and anguish you had to disappear for a weekend, because you were so torn up inside. How do you tell the nation that our own intelligence agencies are spying on us, the American people? Do you let it continue unabated because they do some good, some time?

This was so important you couldn't tell anyone, not even your family where you were going. You had a friend in the Army that you could trust with your life. You asked him to risk his career, his life, and the lives of ten of his soldiers to keep you safe, while you made a decision on how to deal with this enormous problem.

Do you take it straight to the President and hope he handles it correctly.





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 16



At 10:20 AM she was down to the last folio, and the 100 students in her class were dripping with sweat in the air-conditioned room. She did nothing except swear as she corrected each folio. They felt like morons. The only thing that gave them any solace was the way Delicious walked into the room yesterday morning. Apparently she didn't get a perfect grade either from her teacher.

She threw the last folio on the ground, capped her red pen, stood up, and grabbed her bag.

Sadly she said, "I'll see you at work Monday people," and walked out.

There was a mad dash for the books that lay on the floor. Someone started calling out names and throwing books to the right people.

Shouts started, "I passed! I passed!" The shouts continued throughout the room.

"Then who's coming back here Monday?"

"Am I going to have to start teaching you English," Delicious said.

"Where did I say I would meet you Monday?"

"You said you would meet us at work."

"Is this what you do for a living?"

"No ma'am we are the best electrical workers alive."

"You bet your ass you are, because I'm putting my ass in your hands. Enjoy yourselves; you've earned a good day of playing around. When you arrive at the NEST, remember you are the new people on the block. If the maintenance worker tells you to do something, do it, it's for your own benefit. Wear your identification tags on the outside at all times. If you find a problem that is not in your area of jurisdiction mark with your Day-Glo paint, and bring it to the attention to any supervisor. Write it down on your day log, and check it when you go to work the next day. If it has not been repaired, report it again and again until it is repaired. If by Friday of that week it is not repaired, you will report it to the section chief, and he will want to know why the supervisors have not had it repaired. This will happen to your work also. I don't expect one default noted on any electrical work. We have worked too hard and too long in this class for you people to fuck up now. If the cables are wrong don't put them in, reject them. You are not paying for them, and neither are we, who are going to be flying aboard this ship."

"As usual my daughter is wrong. I am paying for the ride of my life on this ship. I am paying nearly $1 billion for that ride, and if you find electrical lines that are not up to specifications don't use them. I'll make sure you have the best made."

"Ladies and gentlemen, my father, Doctor Even Luck; he never goes home."

"I do too. I was there a week ago last Thursday. Congratulations everyone, my daughter told me you would all pass the exam today. She is very proud of you. I'm afraid I lost a friend, because I had him teach her everything about electrical design that normally takes six years, and a PhD in less than a year. He sent me his bill, which I paid with great gratitude and a note telling me to lose his phone number, permanently."

The class roared.

"My daughter has a brilliant mind, and the things that she has done will put many of your children and grandchildren into space in years to come. However, when she was a little younger she had an attitude problem that needed adjusting. If I had only realized what it was, I would've taken care of it myself. Then again, I would've wound up in jail. So we left it up to her husband to do on their wedding night. Now that she is been getting laid regularly, she has become a very docile person."

"Dad, how could you say that about me?"

"I have stories I could tell if you'd like."

"This class is dismissed. I'm going to take my father over my knee and spank him."

"Come with me, Delicious, you are needed elsewhere."

*************

"Hello, who are you?"

"I'm Junie, I live here. Who are you?"

"I'm Robert, I thought I lived here."

"You look just like your father in his pictures."

"You're inside, and I'm still outside. My father's pictures are inside, and you say I look like him. What is going on?"

"You're not supposed to be home from Michigan until next week. Go back to school."

"You also know my school schedule. Can I come in?"

"I don't know; can you be trusted?"

"Trusted in my own house, yes I think so."

"That's not what I'm talking about. Sabrina told me all the stories about you and your women at Michigan. She said, "If your father kept count at Penn, you would either be tied or a close second."

"Sabrina is a liar. I would be first, and my dad would be second."

"You consider this something to be proud of?"

"It's a game. Guys and girls play it."

"Laura and Anna play at it too? I must remember to tell your mother that."

"Keep my sisters out of this. Who did you say you are again?"

"My name is Junie. I thought you said you had a Master's Degree. Shouldn't you be able to remember names?"

"Junie, he's not looking at your face he's looking at your tits."

"Aunt Rita what are you doing here?"

"Junie let me in."

"That's more than I can say for me, I'm still outside."

"The way you've been talking Robert, the two of us are safer if you stayed outside."

"Would you two let me in please?"

"Okay, but if you try anything, Uncle Paul is going to feed you to the helicopter blades."

"He's your Uncle Paul also?"

"Is he yours?"

"I should have stayed at school and partied like I wanted to, instead of coming home early to surprise mom. Where is she? What's going on here?"

"Your mother found a new hobby. She went to Canada to play with Wood Frogs."

"That's it; she finally went over the edge didn't she. Is dad having her put away?"

"Yes he is. He's going to give her the room they take you out of after you learn how to treat women correctly. He knows that will never happen, because it's in your genes. He's keeping your mother, and getting rid of you. He feels he's getting the better of the deal."

"You're very funny Aunt Rita."

"I saved your ass more than once."

"Who is Junie?"

"She's just another girl whose panties you are going to try to get into. I hope you try. She just came home from the US Olympic team Martial Arts tryouts. She broke two bones in her toes, and her training partners jaw while doing Jujitsu. If I were you, I would keep my hands to myself, and that other part of you in a jockstrap."

Robert backed away. "No shit!"

"I'll know in a month if they'll take me back. I was supposed to miss on that kick. They are examining the films to see if it was my fault or my partners."

"I hope they take you back, I don't want you getting angry with me."

"It's too late for that. The way you talk about women being playthings, and sex toys is disgraceful. I can't wait to talk to your mother about your sister's and the other girls at school."

"Don't you dare, she will hang me in the barn."

"Should we get the rope Rita?"

Paul walked into the room and said, "Don't bother I did it as soon as I saw his car in the driveway. There are condoms all over the backseat."

"They are not opened Uncle Paul."

"You are like the Coast Guard Robert, 'Semper Paratus', always ready?"

"I'm only 22, and I'm not ready to have children. I'd rather be in love and married before I have them."

"He sounds like an architect I know. He's blessed with all girls."

"Don't say that; Brad has a head full of gray hair already. Girls will do that to you. I'll get a vasectomy before that happens to me."

"Girls do that to their fathers, because of men like you. You can't wait to bed them, and get rid of them as soon as you are finished with them. Isn't that true my son?"

"Welcome home mom, I didn't see you standing there."

"We had a car service drive us home because there wasn't enough room in the helicopter for the six of us. It seems like we got here at an opportune time. Which of your two sisters would you like to beat the shit out of you?"

Laura asked, "Can I do it mom; it will save him the cost of a vasectomy."

Anna said, "No, you can have the top part of him, leave the bottom part to me. I'm more familiar with that area of the male body then you are."

Robert laughed, "Someone has finally popped your cherry little sister?"

Anna charged him and head butted him in the groin. He fell to the floor screaming. A moment later, he screamed louder as his little sister gripped his balls and squeezed hard.

"No Robert, no one has popped my cherry. It is still firmly intact. Should I drop your slacks and pull these baby makers off. You won't need an operation if I do. You fucked enough women in graduate school to make up for a lifetime. You bragged about it to Laura and me for the last three years. How does it feel to have a real woman stand up to you?"

"I give up. Please let me go."

"You mean these two things make up your 'I'? These things guide you through life. You have no brain. You have no willpower except these things and a dick to point you around day and night. How the fuck did you get your degree. Were you fucking your teachers?"

"Let him go Anna. He is a photocopy of your father. He changed, let's hope one day Robert changes before he catches every disease known to mankind."

"I'm very careful mom; I wear a condom every time I have sex."

"I raised a fucking idiot. Do you kiss the girl? Do you touch the fluids that come out of her body? Are you totally ignorant of how diseases are transmitted from person to person? You would have to wear a condom from your head to your toes to stay safe. When was the last time you were tested?"

"I haven't been tested."

"You are an idiot. Paul, please take my son to the hospital. Have him tested for every disease under the sun. If he objects, beat the crap out of him."

"Robert, do you want to run in front of my truck, or sit inside it?"

Junie asked, "Can I take him please? I haven't practiced my jujitsu in two weeks because of my toes. If he gets out of line, I would love to practice on him."

"No, I'll go with Uncle Paul. Keep her away from me; she's dangerous."

"Move your ass Robert, before I accept her offer."

Robert was out the door in a flash.

Patti looked at Junie and said, "What is this about you and jujitsu?"

"You have to ask Aunt Rita about it."

"It was too funny Patti. Robert came to the door, and Junie played him perfectly. I told him if he tried to get into her panties he was in trouble. She was here resting from the US Olympic team Martial Arts competitions, and she broke her partners jaw, while they were practicing. I think he shit a brick."

"We haven't officially met Junie. I'm Patti Valentino, and these are my daughter's; Laura and Anna. I know your history, but I did not discuss it with the girls. That is up to you. Your past is your past, and your future is bright. Welcome home."

Junie started crying. No one had ever talked to her so kindly in her life. There was a group hug in the middle of the living room, until Patti said, "There will be no more tears, only happiness. Why don't you girls get changed? Go for a swim or horseback riding, and get to know one another. I would like you to become good friends. Callum, Cassie, and Christian should be arriving shortly. They didn't have a car big enough for all six of us to ride in. They are friends of ours from Cottonwood Arizona. They are really good people, and I think you will like them."

"Wow, from being alone all my teenage, and adult life, I'm going to be surrounded by people my own age. This is going to take a little adjustment on my part."

Anna said, "Wait until you see Callum, he is built like a brick wall, and he is gorgeous. Christian is not bad either, but he has to watch his weight. He tends to be like his father."

"Cassie is going to have a problem with Robert. She is a beauty, like her mom. We are going to have to keep our Tasers on us to keep him away from her."

"Before I meet them, I have one question," Junie queried. "How do I tell you to a part?"

Anna laughed. "You have to be blind not to see it. I'm an eighth of an inch shorter than Laura is."

Junie laughed, "Okay, before I say hello, I have to measure you. I'll keep a laser on me."

Patti said, "There is an easier way. If she's bitchy it's Laura; if she's nice it's Anna. It's been that way since birth."

"Mom, I'll tell Junie about your batteries."

"Do you see what I mean Junie? She's bitching already. Get changed children, go outside, and play."

As they walked towards the bedrooms Junie asked, "What do you want to do? I haven't had the chance to buy clothes yet."

"We have plenty, and you should fit into ours easily. They may be a little short, but no one told you to be a giant. We can let down the hems for today, and go shopping tomorrow. Let's go horseback riding. I have missed it so much while I was at school. Oh, Laura's voice is lower than mine. She hasn't given a blowjob, yet, I have."

"Slut!"

"Listen, I took your advice and didn't get laid. Be nice to me, or I'll beat the shit out of you like I did Robert."

"Are you sure you gave a blowjob? I don't have balls or a penis. I'm a female; I thought for sure you would know the difference."

"I can tell you two her sisters. You are not in the house 10 minutes, and you're at each other's throats."

"That's another way you can tell us apart. Laura always loses when we fight."

"Listen tiny, I didn't lose that time, you did."

"For a lousy 1/8 of an inch, I get called tiny and I can't say a thing about it."

**************

"Hello gorgeous, does he ever answer the phone?"

"No he doesn't Lucius, he's afraid he might get carpal tunnel syndrome if he does. He is the laziest human being on this planet, except when it comes to the financial pages."

"Lucius stop flirting with my wife."

"Tell that old man I will stop flirting with you, when he starts treating you properly."

"Are you in the market for a wife Lucius? If you are I may become available soon."

"Jemma give me that phone. I have to talk to that former friend of mine."

"Hello Lucius, how may I help you today?"

"I was wondering if you could call me and take a stroll in Washington. I have a Dalmatian you may be interested in."

"I've heard that Dalmatians are not good with little children."

"The breeder assures me that this dog is absolutely the tip top of the breed."

"Give me a call when you are in town, and I will take the Metroliner to see you."

"This dog is going to be very expensive William."

"Lucius, between us cost has never been a problem."

"I'm going to send you an email of the pup. He is really cute."

"I can't wait to see him. Take care Lucius, I'll see you soon."

****************

William opened his secure computer and saw the message was 26 pages long. He printed it out and deleted it instantly. It was the complete speech Congressman Bordeaux was going to deliver to the Congress. For a man who had never been surprised by anything in his life, the last part of this speech took him by surprise.

Everyone who was anyone knew that the intelligence agencies were spying on the American people since 9/11. However, when the vice president of the United States authorizes an intelligence agency to attack a civilian target, within the borders of the United States, it is a criminal act. As the Congressman said he could not prove it. It was all done by word of mouth, and it would be his word against the word of the vice presidents. I think we should delete that part of the speech; it would make him easier prey.

He closed down his computer, pulled out the hard drive, and smashed it. He knew better than to leave that type of evidence behind. He lit the documents and threw them in the fireplace. He watched them until they turned into a useless pile of ash.

He sat down and began to think: "How do you lure the Vice President of the United States into an open forum where he is vulnerable to attack? "

William smiled. "MONEY! You want to start to fund his run for the Presidency of the United States with a check for $50 million. You are a very private man, but in this case, you can see no better man sitting in the White House for the next eight years then William Silvers.

Where do you want to do this?

We definitely do not want to do it in Washington. There is no means of escape. I'll ask Lucius to check out his estate in West Virginia. We will make it a family affair. I'll bring Jemma and Patrick with me. I think I'll get shot too, just for show. It will make wonderful press. I'll run this by Lucius to see what he thinks. I think it is time for another walk with Patrick."

'Jemma, it's a beautiful day outside. I think I'll go for a walk. Can I take Patrick with me?"

"What, you actually want people to associate you with a child? Won't that ruin your image?"

"Woman, you have ten seconds to say yes and kiss me, before I leave all alone."

"Yes, I love you; don't forget what your son looks like. Should I put a name tag on him, or attach a balloon to his wrist just in case?"

"Jemma, you are gorgeous when you are being you. You are my life, I love you."

"I guess I'll tell Lucius the wedding is off?"

"I must talk to that friend of mine."

"Don't you dare, he got you to call me gorgeous."

"You are, no one should have to tell you that, but I promise, I will, every day."

"We are out of Butter Pecan Ice Cream."

"Okay."

"Bring me Butter Pecan Ice Cream William."

"Where do I buy it?

"In a store William, in a food store."

"Any particular food store?"

"William, I will be amazed if you find a food store, no less a particular store. Ask your bodyguards to help you find one, but bring me my Ice Cream or someone is in trouble."

"Poor Patrick, I didn't mean to get him in trouble with his mother."

"Get out of this house before I explode. Go, now, and don't forget the baby."

As the front door closed Jemma thought, "How can such a brilliant man be such a scatter-brain?"

**************

70. Another Day

Gray said, "Birdbrain is right dad. I ran a computer simulation using the Fusion Engines and brought them up to 2200°. We can definitely reach Warp 8 or possibly 8.5. I hate when Gordon's right and it took me three weeks to prove it.

"Henpecked, if I'm a birdbrain, how come it took you three weeks to prove I was correct?"

"If you weren't so little, and so smart, I throw you off the roof of this building for that remark. It took me 2 ½ weeks to set up the simulation on Big Blue. The damn thing wouldn't believe the numbers it was coming up with and kept going to default. It took me two days to fix it. It took six hours to run the program and it finally said that it would work."

Gordon laughed at Gray. "Did you ever doubt me?"

Gordon started running. Gray took off after him like a hound after a hare. My son was too fast him. As he came around the corner I grabbed him and brought him to a halt.

"Dad, he's going to kill me."

"You called him henpecked. If you think he is, what am I with your mother?"

Before he could answer, Gray had him by the back of his neck.

"Little man, I can't wait until it happens to you. I am going to laugh my head off."

"I am going to be the master of my household."

Every scientist in the room laughed at that statement. They knew better.

"Do you remember what your Uncle Rod asked me just before all of us walked into the ballroom the day your mother and I got married?"

"No, I was talking with Danielle and Brandy."

He said, "If you are going to run your household stand on the right. If Jennifer is going to run the household, let her stand on the right. Did your mother or I walk on the right side as we entered the ballroom?"

"Mom did."

"Does that answer your question about who the head of your household is going to be?"

"Is it always that way dad?"

Before I could answer him the room exploded with a resounding, "YES."

"Do you want to look at my simulation; it's a thing of beauty?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 16



Gordon said, "If you did it, it's probably 1990s technology." He forgot Gray still had him by the back of his neck. He got smacked hard for that error.

"Dad he hit me."

"Be thankful it wasn't me, you would be on the floor. You are getting a little too big for your britches young man. Do you remember what your room looked like after a week?"

"Yes sir; I'm sorry Gray, I was out of line."

"You are forgiven. Let's go look at my simulation, and see if I did anything wrong. One more thing dad; we are going to have to put ears on the Beach Ball. It's going to look like Mickey Mouse. I'll show you why in the simulation."

"Are we going to have a trade mark infraction problem with Disney Properties?"

"They're going to have to come an awful long way to sue us. Rod will be here to take care of whatever problems that may ensue."

As the simulation showed, the spacecraft had two-exposed carbon fiber rigging's containing scientific instruments. The problem was the instruments were mostly housed in metal frames. The radar array, the infrared camera bodies, the laser instruments, everything was metal. They could not withstand the build-up of heat caused by our acceleration to 17,600 mph to penetration the earth's atmosphere and enter the zero gravity of space. They had to have a protective covering or they would melt and be of no use to us.

Gray came up with the perfect solution. The rigging's would collapse against the spacecraft as originally planned. However, they were covered by the same Graphine/ Carbon fiber material, shaped like a modified ear, to absorb, and deflect the heat, away from these delicate instruments. The larger instruments would be outboard, and the smaller instruments inboard, giving each the greatest flexibility, and protection.

He restarted the program and ran it at full speed. It was awesome from the beginning. The Beach Ball lifted off the ground, as planned, to a height of 200 feet, and hovered, while we checked our instruments. Then the spacecraft moved South East, racing to an altitude of 55,000 feet as we passed over Galveston at more than 7000 mph. Delicious' Gravity Defying Engines were working at one-third power. At 120,000 feet, the world turned black. We were at 16,000 miles per hour, and the engines were pushed to 50% power. Seconds later, we were in space, hurtling towards the moon. Our rear engine power was pushed to full, as Delicious engaged the forward gravity pulling engines. The spacecraft took off like a thoroughbred.

The ears were unfurled and started sending pictures back to what would be an astounded earth. We passed the moon in seconds and set our sights on Mars.

Gray put the simulation into fast forward and as predicted we passed Mars in one hour and 13 minutes at one-quarter light-speed, or 46,500 miles per second. According to the simulation, the computers began falling behind. We would have to find a way to reprogram them to compensate for these incredible speeds.

Then Delicious announced she was preparing to launch the Ion/H2 engine. I could be heard saying, "It's too soon." She replied, "Wimp." The fanlike blades on the exterior of the shell retracted, and little jet/like engines replaced them. These were the Ion/ Hydrogen 2 emitters. When they combined, it had the effect of a military jet going into afterburner, times the speed of light.

The spacecraft was approaching 80 percent of light-speed when Gray's simulation started up, the Nuclear Fusion Reactor. As soon as all the lights turned green, the rear bulkhead door opened, the engine moved outside the spacecraft and into position. The clamps closed over the tracks, locking the reactor in place. The bulkhead door closed, and all the safety lights returned to green inside the spacecraft.

Sitting at the master control board Jennifer called out, I have a Green Board. "

Every control station reported, Green Board back to her.

She was supposed to say 'Full Power' but Gray changed it.

Jennifer said, "HIT IT BOYS!"

The result was the same.

If the computers fell behind before, they moved into yesterday now. The spacecraft jumped through light speed without a buffet, as is experienced when you go through the sound barrier. It was into a warp bubble, before we knew it happened. Gray's simulation showed a side view of the warp bubble forming around our ship. As we moved faster the bubble grew larger. As Gordon said the only thing that would limit us would be the capacity of our engines. He was right again.

When Gray's simulation ended, 35 minutes later, the craft was doing warp 8.01, and my head was spinning. Could we really move that fast: 15,066,000 miles per second. That is insane until you think of what it means what you travel in one hour. I looked at the screen and rubbed my eyes just to make sure I was reading it correctly. Warp 8 / 5,368,000,000 miles per hour. I sat down and wrote it out long hand, just to let it sink in. FIVE BILLION, THREE HUNDRED SIXTY EIGHT MILLION, MILES PER HOUR. I don't know how many times I watched Star Trek, and Star Trek - The Next Generation, I just didn't know if they used the same Warp Factor 8 as I was looking at now. By any figment of the imagination that was one hell of a number.

Gray asked us what we thought.

I said, "I'd like to leave tomorrow if we could. I know it's not possible, but your simulation was awe-inspiring."

Before he could say anything I looked at Gordon with a face that told him he would be in trouble if he said something that was not positive.

"Gray I think it was very good, but I have one problem. I don't think we should have a rotating radar system. I think we should use a pulse system instead. We can have one on each side, and focus the radar beams away from the ship, rather than have another high-energy source bombarding us every few seconds."

"That's a great idea Gordon. Should we use the millimeter wavelength, or long wave?"

"I believe the Air Force has a system that uses both. We could check and see what company makes it for them?"

I said, "I'll call Stephano and have him find out who does it. By the way, I love the look of the ears."

"Three weeks of work, and he likes the ears. I'm going to talk to your daughter about you, I think you're overworked."

"I'll rest when we are past Pluto."

Gordon said, "It's so small, and we will be traveling so fast, we probably won't see it."

"Mr. Navigator, it may be small, but don't run into it please."

"Aye, Aye captain; I have a bet that the Ion/H2 engines don't work anyhow." Gordon took off running.

"Stop that little son of a bitch, I'll kill him," Delicious yelled.

Gray grabbed her as she came close to him. "Baby, if I couldn't catch him among this warren of desks and chairs, you can't either. We will have to wait until he's eating; then we can start throwing knives at him."

"I have a better idea. I'll poison him first, and then I'll throw knives at him."

"You should have been here when he called me henpecked. He said he is going to be the master of his household. Everyone laughed at him."

"You are henpecked, and you love it."

"I didn't say I didn't, and neither did anyone else here. Gordon will find that out a little later in life. Where's Newton?"

"Mom has him. She was going food shopping and took him along with her."

"Its 4:30 PM, would you like to go home a little early today?"

"Are you thinking evil thoughts again?"

"I'm always thinking evil thoughts when my wife is around."

"Okay, but I'm on top this time, because you're gaining weight."

"It's because of the lack of sex. I'm not getting enough exercise."

"It's not because of me. I'm the one awake at night, while the person next to me is sleeping."

"That's a lie."

"Should I take my video camera out and take pictures of you cuddling with your pillow instead of me?"

"You must have been taking your two hour-long showers, and I got tired of waiting."

"Who stopped you from joining me in the shower?"

"I may have slipped, and I didn't want to miss work?"

"Look at all the time you're wasting arguing with me now, when we could be on our way home. Do you want to start working again, while I leave?"

Gray picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. He yelled, "I'm going home. I'm going to experiment on my wife."

Everyone in the room applauded.

Delicious said, "Goodbye dad, when Gordon comes out of hiding, hit him for me."

She smiled at everyone, and waved goodbye to everyone from her vantage point on Gray's shoulder.

*****************

"Gray doesn't seem to mind being henpecked. Why is that?"

"Son there is an old saying, 'A Happy Wife Means a Happy Life." One day you will find that saying is as important to your life as any of the 10 Commandments, and possibly more so."

"Have you heard from your friend Michael?"

"No I haven't, not in a long time. He doesn't have our phone number down here. I never sent it to him. I'll call him and see how he's doing."

***************

"One Leg Up Flying Service, this is Michael speaking. How may help you?"

"Michael, this is "Hard Left Rudder, Hard Left Turn. I'm ready to try it to the right side now."

"You lying sack of shit; you're in the middle of building a spaceship. Why didn't you give me your phone number asshole?"

"I'm sorry about that my friend, with everything that was going on it totally skipped my mind. How is your new airplane?"

"She is a dream Even. She has everything any pilot could ever wish for, plus some. It took me over two months to become acquainted with half the stuff you put in her for me. It took 40 minutes flying time off from Nome to Fairbanks, and it uses less fuel. She's a magnificent machine. Thank you very much; I am the envy of everyone up here."

"You saved my life Michael, how does anybody repay a friend for doing that. The airplane was little enough to show my gratitude."

"If it wasn't for your birdbrain idea, we would both be dead Even. I would never have done that on my own. Who would've ever thought of trying to back into trees? When I got back up here my friends did not believe me when I told them the story. I had a college kid make up the simulation to show them what we did. Head on into the trees we were toast. Smacking the tail into those trees is what saved us. No one here wants to do it on purpose, but if they are ever faced with that type situation, they now know they have that as a possible lifesaving device."

"Do me one favor Michael, make sure it's not you again. I won't be there to make you a rickshaw, and I will not kill another deer."

"I put a gun into the airplane as a just in case. The next time I have a squeamish passenger, I'll kill the deer myself."

"Did you marry the nurse in Fairbanks?"

"Hell no, she married me. She couldn't get enough of my hands."

"You're joking with me aren't you Michael? You're too ugly for that pretty girl to marry you."

"I swear, when I got back up here I had to continue going to rehab. She had to take the bandage off my leg and then bandage my leg after I was done. One thing led to another and she got down on her knee and proposed."

"Should I ask her how it happened, or do I already know that you're lying through your ass."

"If you already know I'm lying through my ass, why bother asking Jill?"

"Are you going to have a family?"

"We have a two-year-old little girl running around the house."

"That's not a family. If something is broken you already know who did it. You have to have three or more so there is some detective work to be done."

"Even, this is Alaska, the land of six-month winters and six-month summers. It would be hard to keep track of multiple children in the dark."

"Attach flashing yellow anklets around each child and you will never lose them."

"You are hysterical Even. I have to go prepare the aircraft for a flight in an hour. I have a customer that wants to shoot a moose. I hope he knows which end of the gun to point, but that's not my problem. I just have to get him there. Call me before you leave this world, otherwise I'll come and get you."

"It would be a hell of a trip Michael, but it would be well worth it. You just gave me an idea for another patent by the way."

"I want half of it."

"You'll get it. Goodbye Michael."

"Goodbye and thank you for everything you've done for me, Even; including the rickshaw ride."

**************

"Gordon come with me, I'm going to design and write up the paperwork for a new patent."

"What are you going to make dad?"

"Flashing anklets for little children so parents can see them in the dark."

"Hasn't anyone thought of that before?"

"Have you seen any advertisements for them before?"

"No I haven't."

"Why shouldn't we give it a try? It should take us an hour, or less."

As I sat by my desk he asked "How much do you think it'll cost to make?"

"It should cost less than $.30 to make. A four-inch round elastic band, 10-14 multicolored LED beads, and a body heat activated battery inside one of those beads. We can have it made in Haiti, Indonesia, Bangladesh, or Vietnam, and there it is; we have the prototype for a patentable product.

Now we have to get your mother to go shopping for us. We have to build six of them to go to the patent office.

"That's it dad? That's all you have to do to file a patent?"

"For something as simple as this is yes. When we filed the patent for your fusion reactor, it was a lot more work. It was much more technical and much more legal. Rod is working on more patents for it now. Have I told you how proud I am of you for doing that?"

"Only about 10 million times dad, but when I hear it from you, it's wonderful each time."

"Thank you Gordon, we're going home early today too. Get your things and meet me at the door."

"We can't leave, it's still light outside."

"It will be a novel experience for both of us."

***********

71. Mister Speaker

"Good morning, this is Horace Bordeaux of Louisiana may I have a moment of the Speakers' time please. It is a matter of the utmost urgency.

"One moment Congressman."

"Good morning Horace, what seems to be the problem?"

"Mr. Speaker, I have the most distressing news. It have proof that the NSA, CIA, and other intelligence agencies have been spying on the American people and performing illegal acts inside the continental United States, without appropriate authorization or warrants. I wish to present the evidence of two murderous attacks on citizens and property of the United States before the full Congress, and the people of this country, Thursday at the time of your choosing. I want to do this publicly because I believe once this is done; I will not live much longer. I am not saying this to be melodramatic. I had to leave my wife and family behind this past weekend, not telling them where I went, to make this decision. I have a friend I trusted with my life. He put his career on the line to help me find a place where I could make this decision, and understand what would happen to me and to my family. I had to balance that against the needs of our country. I made the decision that our country had to come first, regardless of what happened to me.

My wife and family are going to be put into a safe house, until I make my statement. Then we will go into hiding. I will give up my seat in The Congress and hopefully find a place in this world where we may be safe."

"Horace is all of this as menacing as it sounds?"

"Sir the evidence I am going to give the Congress is irrefutable. They used military hardware... No I'm not going to go any further Sir. If I did it could put you in great jeopardy. I am going to stay in hiding until you announce publicly what time you want me to arrive.

I am going to call the news media and give them the same information I just gave you. Tell your staff to protect you from them, and have a statement ready to keep them off your back. It has always been my pleasure to work with you and for you in the House of Representatives."

"Thank you Horace, I will pray for you and your family. I will call for a caucus this afternoon, and set a time for your appearance. I will make it public so you will know when to be here."

"Don't make me wait too long Mr. Speaker, they already know I have this information, and they are looking for me."

***********

"This is Congressman Bordeaux of Louisiana; may I have a moment of the Vice President's time?"

"I'm sorry Congressman the Vice President is in a meeting, may take a message?"

"Yes you may. Please tell the Vice President he does not have to get back in touch with me. Tell him 'The Game Has Ended At Me.' He will laugh when he hears it."

"Thank you Congressman, I'll give him the message."

"Good work Congressman, maybe we can get out of this with our skins intact. What do you think about New Zealand? It's a beautiful country; English speaking, good schools, and the people are nice. With the money you have offshore, you should be able to live a decent life for a long time.

There is also Spain, where a lot of Europeans go to retire. Living there is very inexpensive, and the Mediterranean coast is idyllic. The only problem is the language."

"How soon can I talk to my wife?"

"Her phone is probably bugged. She will hear about you from the media today, and know you are alive. I'll call a member of Team 1 to see if he can get a cell phone to her. If he can she will call me."

"Thank you Colonel, you've gone way out on a limb for me, and I can't tell you how much I appreciate it."

"We are both serving the same nation Congressman, and you have made me very proud of the way you are standing up for it. At the beginning I did not believe you had it in you. I am very happy to say I was wrong."

Sgt. Zachary yelled out, "I heard that."

"Give me 50 Sergeant."

"I'm sorry sir did you say something?"

"In five seconds it will be 500."

"One, two, and three..."

"The privileges of rank Colonel?"

"You have to show them who's boss every once and again."

***************

72. Tuesday: It's A New Day

Patty got out of bed at a 7:45 A.M. She thought there was a war going on in the kitchen. She threw on her robe and slippers and hurried there. The table was stacked with food of every kind. Six adult children or was it children/adults were laughing hysterically and hurling insults at one another nonstop. The main targets were Robert and Callum.

Callum had a very stout defense. "Emma chased me." he said, "It was not the other way around. She even flew me to Los Angeles so I could be with her."

Anna laughed at him. "Did you wait until you got to Los Angeles to screw her, or did you do it in the airplane?"

"It was her airplane. We only did it three times, because it was a short flight."

"Did you at least try to fight her off?"

"Yes, but she was very convincing."

Robert said, "Do you see what's going on here? Emma did to Callum, what I did to the girls at Michigan and you think its okay. Why is it okay for him, and not okay for me? Isn't that a double standard?"

"Are you sure you attended college these past three years? There's no comparison at all between what happened between Emma and Callum, and what you did at Michigan.

Emma and Callum had a three-week monogamous relationship. I wonder if you had a toothbrush that lasted three weeks."

"Very funny, which one are you again?"

"Stand up, and I'll remind you."

"Very funny Anna, I'll get even with you later."

"I'm Laura asshole, go to your room, and put your contacts in, so you can see your wee little dick."

"I don't get any complaints from the ladies at school."

"That's probably the reason why. You didn't hurt them like the big guys do."

"Would you like to try it on for size?"

"If you can beat me up, you can have me bareback."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 17



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

Note: This chapter is dedicated to my readers who have asked me not to cut this story short, but to continue it until its logical end. A special thank you goes to AlunCarregTheWelshman, Sid0604, ACUP, and Anonymous Roger, who always push me to write these chapters, better than I believe I am capable of doing. P_D10 




76. Brilliant Endings

William's Zabo's attorney, Vincent Davis contacted John Cassidy, the Vice President's Chief of Staff and told him his client was so impressed with the positions William Silver had espoused over the years he would like to kick off his presidential campaign with a donation of $50 million. The only caveat he insisted upon was it not take place in the zoo of Washington D.C. His client was a very private man. He did not mind a little attention, but having every camera and reporter in Washington pointed at him was not acceptable. He would prefer it to be done as a family matter, either at his home in New York, or at the vice president's estate in West Virginia.

Cassidy said, "The Vice President will be home over the Independence Day recess. I am sure he would love to have you and your wife stay at his estate while you make this presentation. We will limit the amount of press allowed, so Mister Zabo feels comfortable. Will that be acceptable to your client?"

"I'm sure Mister Zabo will find that acceptable, and thank the Vice President for his consideration. He will be coming with his four-year-old son, Patrick, and a small entourage. If you will give us the day and time you wish us to arrive, I will give you the exact amount of people to expect."

"Thank you Mister Davis, I will check the Vice President's schedule and get back to you as soon as possible."

The VP said, "Who the hell is this guy? I've never heard of him?"

"You have to be kidding me Bill. He's almost as rich as Gates, but he doesn't make it known to anyone. You will never see him on the Forbes list of the wealthiest men in the world, because he never allows anyone to know what he has. All anyone knows is that he's clean as a whistle. He pays taxes in the U.S. and in every country he owns businesses. The problem is some countries have tax laws that are so antiquated if you're supposed to pay $1 million in taxes, and pay $1000, the country says thank you. He is considered the most brilliant investor in the world."

"Can he afford $50 million?"

"Have you been listening to me? He probably carries that much around as pocket change."

"Make sure the estate is groomed like a golf course. I don't want a blade of grass out of place. Get pool reporters, and live television coverage of the event. No more than 20 of them on the grounds. That should satisfy Mister Zabo. Ask if he wants his son in the same room with him and his wife, or a separate room. If he wants a separate room, have a nanny for him. $50 million and it doesn't have to be reported to the Election Commission, because I have not announced I'm running. It's a great way to start a campaign that hasn't started yet."

"The other side will cry foul."

"They can cry foul all they want, it is perfectly legal."

**************

"Lucius my friend he bit. It will be at his estate over the Independence Day recess. I have something I want to run by you and get your expert opinion. I have not gone crazy, but you may think so before I finish. Hear me out, before you start laughing at me."

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

"If this works, are we still getting paid?"

"Have I ever not paid you in full?"

"I will tell you what I think about your plan, if you promise not to shoot me?"

"Do I have to promise not to shoot you?"

"Where would I spend all your money if I was dead?"

"Good point, well-made. I promise not to shoot you."

"William, you are the most brilliant man alive. If he falls for this on live television, he is as good as dead in the political world. People will laugh at him for the rest of his life."

"It's exactly what I thought. I think it should be fun watching his reaction."

"Fun hell, I'm going to record it, and transmit it around the world daily."

"Lucius that's mean."

"I don't have a mean bone in my body."

"Goodbye my friend, I'll see you in West Virginia."

"Let's try not to laugh when we see each other."

"That will be very hard to do."

*****************

Robert walked into the terminal looking for Cindi standing next to Cindi. They were very hard to miss. They were both elegantly dressed in formfitting yellow mini dresses. They had legs that seem to end at their shoulders and four delectable breasts. They were stunning, and could pass for women half their age. He would be proud to have either one of them on his arm, and preferably both at the same time.

Sandi asked Cindy "Is he breathing?"

"No, not yet, he's not turning blue. Give him another minute and he will."

"I told you we should have brought Debbie and Danni with us. When he had his heart attack, they could have given him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation."

"With the size of that erection, Danny would've taken his mouth, and Debbie would've taken his dick. When they were done with him his stomach would have been distended."

"Are you in there Robert?"

"Yes lady's, I am just a little stunned at the moment. Your uncle didn't say how beautiful both of you are. I just wasn't expecting it. I'm sorry I'm staring. Which one of you is Sandi?"

Both women raised their hands.

Robert laughed. "I can see this is going to be a great interview. How does anyone know who they are talking to when you decide to fool around?"

"They don't, that's what makes it so much fun. The only way you can tell us apart is Cindi has a small mole under her left breast, Sandi doesn't."

"Cool, would you lady's please drop your tops for a moment; I want to see which one of you is Sandi."

The women looked at each other. Cindi said, "I like a man with balls."

"I have two of them if you're interested."

"Presumptive little prick aren't you?"

"You started this line of questioning."

"Yes we did, didn't we?"

"Are we doing the interview here? If we are I will tell the crew to stay close by and we will return home in a few hours."

"No, you seem to think on your feet well enough. I think we'll take you home to meet my father. The court is closed for the summer, and he loves chewing on little tykes like you."

"I've read some of your father's opinions, and I must say I disagree with all his conclusions."

"He's going to put you in a cheese grater and grind you up."

"He's not going to do anything to me as long as I'm standing here."

"Come on boy, I want to see you die slowly."

"I am no one's boy. My name is Robert. Not Bob, not Bobby, not hey you. My name is Robert, and if you don't call me by my proper name, you can go fuck each other."

"It's been nice knowing you Bob."

Robert turned around and started walking back towards the aircraft.

A short time later two arms grabbed his arms.

"Back off ladies I'm going back to New York, where civilized people live."

"It was just a test Robert. We wanted to see if you had the courage of your convictions. You did. Come with us, our parents are waiting to see you."

"Any more tests like that lady's, and I am history."

"Agreed, but it does not mean you are hired."

"I know. I just want you to understand I have limits, and I will stand by them."

******************

"This is a nice house; it's almost as big as mine."

"We've seen the blueprints of your house. It's on one level, and it's smaller than our house. We have two floors, your house can't compete."

"Looks are deceiving, we have two levels. One is underground; it's where we keep our computers and testing equipment. The underground footprint is actually larger than our house. We even have an underground walkway that takes us to the garage when it's raining or snowing."

"None of that is on the blueprints for your house."

"How, might I ask, would you know that?"

Sandi blushed. "We looked through the archives of your building and zoning department."

"If I told your father that what would he say?"

"He wouldn't say anything. He would beat the crap out of both of us."

"Oh good, I have leverage."

"When he gets finished with you, you won't have legs."

****************

"MOM, DAD, we're home."

Chief Justice Fred Hastings, came out of his den, and asked, "What took you so long?"

Robert replied, "Sir, they took every opportunity they could to try to emasculate me. They did not succeed. It wasn't until I walked back towards my aircraft they gave in and brought me here. I apologize for the delay."

He stared at his daughters, whose heads were facing the ground. "Go to your rooms, and get ready for your punishment. What you did was no way to treat our guest."

"Dad we were testing him. We were trying to see if he had the guts to stand up to the stress of a campaign. He passed, and that's why we brought him home. We thought he might be a spoiled rich kid, who had everything handed to him on a silver platter. He stood up for himself, and he did very well. We decided to keep him."

"Did you just argue against my decision?"

"No dad, it was an explanation of our actions."

"Where are you supposed to be right now?"

"We are supposed to be in our rooms."

"Where are you?"

"We are in the kitchen."

"Do you find a discrepancy there?"

"Yes dad."

"Are you going to fix it?"

"Yes dad."

"When?"

"Now dad."

Cindi and Sandi ran for the stairs, up to their rooms. They undressed to the skin, and took the paddles out from their closets. They assumed the position across their beds their father expected them to be when he arrived. They dare not move. They did not want the punishment to be any worse than they knew it was going to be.

"Sit down Robert, and tell me about yourself."

Robert decided to lay the ugly truth before the Chief Justice.

"Sir, normally I am the laziest person on the face of the earth, when it comes to studying. My only saving grace is I am very smart. I am photographic, but I have never put it to good use. I just received my Master's degree from Michigan with a 3.6 GPA, and I did not open a book in three years. My paper was on the political system; and how it is so broken it cannot be repaired as it is today. My professor was livid with me and threatened to fail me because of what I wrote. I challenged him to prove me wrong. 

In front of a panel of three-professors, we were challenged with questions about the political system. Then we challenged each other with questions. He couldn't prove me wrong. The panel decided I had proved my point, and my professor had to give me my rightful grade, which was an 'A'. 

That's why I'm here. I want to start changing our political system from the bottom up. We have to get rid of the people at the top. They are so attached to the theories and culture of the 60s, 70s, and 80s; they will never catch up to the realities of the 21st century. I'm not saying children should run the Congress, or the country. I'm saying that new ideas should not be snuffed out by people with 30 years tenure, who are running committees like tyrants."

"How else would you change the Congress Robert?"

"I would like to see more business people in the Congress. They have the expertise in handling tax and growth prospects better than lawyers. Our tax system dates back to the 1960s. It has been adjusted to the advantage of the very rich. During the Eisenhower administration, and the early 1960s, the tax rate on wealthy people was 90 percent. It was much too high and the Congress dropped it to 39%. However, the Congress left so many loopholes in the new tax code that many wealthy people wound up paying less tax than an average middle-class couple, with two children, claiming four deductions. 

For example, one loophole allowed the rich to claim their second and third homes as tax deductions, even though they were not their primary residences. It didn't matter if it was a one-room shack on 100,000 acres of land, or a Co-op apartment in New York City, they were legal tax reductions. The extremely rich wound up paying of a smaller percentage of their annual income, than 60 percent of working class Americans.

We have the highest corporate tax rate of any industrialized country in the world. This must change if we want businesses to stay here, and not move their corporate headquarters overseas with lesser tax rates. They incorporate in Ireland or Portugal, and leave their operations here in the states. It's tax evasion, and the Congress knows it. However, they're not willing to do anything about it, because there is such gridlock between both political parties."

"What do you think about the court system?"

"It's broken because of the other two branches of government.

"The President has nominated 36 men and women to fill vacancies in Federal Court System throughout the nation. The Senate has only approved seven of them in the past six years. How do they expect the courts to keep up with the volume of cases facing them if the Senate won't take up, and approve or disapprove these nominations?"

"You have very low opinion of our political system. How would you change it?"

"I believe it was Winston Churchill who said, 'Democracy is the worst form of government, except for everything else.' 

If we are going to keep it, we have to evolve into a better, bipartisan country that does not divide the Red States against the Blue States. It should not work that way."

"That was an excellent quotation Robert, and it was Churchill who said it in the House of Commons. However, he lost the next election, because he told the people the truth. The people didn't want to hear the truth after years of suffering due to the Second World War. Truth is a double-edged sword. After Churchill was forced out of office, England went into its worst recession since the 1930s."

"Yes sir, I know. Churchill; however, did not become antagonistic towards the new government. He tried to help it. He was a true patriot."

"Very good Robert, I like your depth of knowledge, and that you speak your mind without hesitation. You are going to have to learn to control it, and keep to the speaking points of the campaign. Jim Green will teach you that, along with my daughters. My wife, Sharon will be home shortly. She is also an excellent source of knowledge. She has had to put up with me for 24 years, and you have to be quite a woman to do that. How do you feel about nudity?"

"I'm all for it sir."

"I understand you came here on a Boeing 757, is that correct?"

"Yes sir it is."

"Is it available for a few days?"

"I can call my mother and find out."

"Please do that, it will save us the cost of renting a jet."

"Where would we be going sir?"

"We have a home in Barbados. It wouldn't do to tell your mother it is in a nudist colony. She might become upset."

"Yes sir, I think I'll leave that part out. How long will we be there?"

Sharon said, "Two weeks, and not one day less. It's my vacation, and if you shortchange me on this, I'll cut you off for the entire summer recess."

Robert stood up, "Good afternoon Mrs. Hastings."

"Good afternoon Robert, please call me Sharon."

"Thank you very much Sharon, it's a pleasure to meet you."

"Has my husband finished torturing you?"

"We have had a very collegial conversation Sharon. I've enjoyed it very much."

"Fred, are you getting old; are you losing your mind?"

"Do you want to get a spanking dear? The girls are waiting for theirs. I can always add one more."

"What did our two oldest darlings do this time?"

"They were rude to our guests. Then they decided to question my decision. So instead of 5, they now earned 10."

"You are going to have such fun this afternoon."

"Who said I was going to do it? They insulted Robert; he's going to do it."

"They will be mortified."

"They will have learned a valuable lesson. We are also going on Roberts 757, with his mother's approval. Robert would you give your mom a call please?"

***********

"We can have the jet for as long as we want sir. It is not scheduled for use anytime soon."

"That's wonderful Robert. Now you have one more thing to do for me. Since my daughters insulted you they are waiting upstairs for their punishment. They are expecting to be punished with their paddles 10 times. You can hit them once, and reserve nine for a later date, or you can use all of them now. It is your prerogative. If they complain, their punishment doubles. Remind them of this rule. It has been many years since I have had to enforce punishment on them.

If they use foul language, for each inappropriate word they use, it is one misdemeanor. If they get to third misdemeanor, remind them the fourth one becomes a felony and I will be coming up to their rooms, and pay them a visit. They do not want that to happen. 

Enjoy yourself Robert; if you go easy on them, you will join them. We will know if you were not harsh enough on them if we don't hear them cry out down here."

"You will hear them sir; I have no desire to join them."

*****************

Robert walked up the stairs and each door had a nameplate attached to it. He wasn't sure who the main perpetrator was at the airport, so he decided to go alphabetically. Cindi's was first. He didn't know what to expect when he walked into her room, so he braced himself. He locked his mouth closed so no sound would come out of it. When he opened her door, he nearly crushed his teeth to dust as he looked upon what awaited him.

Cindi was lying across her bed; her knees were at the very edge, her legs wide apart, and her ass in the air. She was shaved clean, and her pussy was wide open, and wet. 

When she saw Robert, instead of her father, she said, "Oh Fuck!"

Menacingly, he replied, "That's one misdemeanor."

"Where's my father?"

"Did you just question another of your father's decisions?"

"No I didn't, please forgive me sir."

"I'll think about it. I'll ask him what the punishment is for that offense."

"Please don't, I'll do anything, but don't tell him I questioned his decision."

His voice became very authoritative.

"I said I think about it. Did you have fun with me at the airport?"

"It was just a test."

"That was not my question. Did you have fun with me?"

"Yes sir, we did."

"Do you want to guess who's going to have fun now?"

"You are sir."

"Put your hands behind your back, and turn your head to the left. You will not bite the sheet as I hit you. You will count every stroke out loud."

"Yes sir.

Robert picked up the paddle.

"Are you ready Cindi? "

"Yes sir, I am ready."

As he took up his position behind her, he couldn't help looking again, at the fluid dripping from her vagina. 

He stepped back, and hit her hard.

She screamed, "One."

He put his hand under her sex to see what the result was from his first attack on her ass. Cindi went from a drip to a constant flow.

He turned the paddle around, and wet the handle with the fluid he collected. He rubbed it against her inflamed labia, until Cindi started pounding her head against the bed.

She yelled, "Its been so long, fuck me, please!"

"Should I count that as two?"

"You can't, it was a request."

"You picked the wrong day; I'm not taking requests today."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 17



He rubbed the handle over her swollen lips, and inside the pink of her vagina. He moved the handles edge slowly towards her clitoris, but stopped just short of it.

Cindi moved her hips in an attempt to make contact with that hard object, but Robert moved it away faster than she could find it.

"You prick."

"That's two misdemeanors, and you can't have my prick. I save it for women who know how to treat their guests properly."

He started another circuit around her lips, towards her asshole and started to press in. He was surprised when she did not back away from the hexagonal shaped object, because it was very large. He kept pressing inward, and she pushed towards it.

"Enjoying that, are we? Well, we can't have that, it would ruin my fun for this afternoon." He moved the paddle away from her back door, and into the pink of her vagina. He moved it close to her clitoris, and started making circles millimeters from 'the little boy in the boat'.

Cindy's started moving her hips in desperation trying to get the paddle to touch her 'HOT' spot.

Robert yelled, "Stay still."

"You cock sucker, you're dead." 

"That's three misdemeanors; I'm told at number four it becomes a felony, and your father comes to pay you a visit. I would pay to see that."

"I'll be good, please don't tell him. Please fuck me, I need to cum."

"You just killed me, how could I possibly have sex with you, vaginal or anal, if I am dead?"

"Fuck you boy, there's no way you're getting a piece of my ass."

"I'm sorry to say to you but that is Number four or ONE FELONY. I must tell your father that you surpassed the limit he allows you. I don't think I want to be in the room with you when he arrives. I don't know what the protocol is for that type of punishment. Do you stay undressed, or do you get dressed in a particular fashion for him to beat the crap out of you. I can understand the beating he is going to give you, but what else happens?"

"We get restricted to the house for the entire time the family is in Barbados. The cameras and alarms are on. Unless the house is on fire, we are not allowed to step one foot outside the house. We can't go out for food or anything. It's the way he raised us, since the day we first met him." 

"It's a shame to lose a trip to that wonderful island, because you lost your temper, by one misdemeanor. It should be at least two."

He moved back, swung the paddle, and hit her hard.

"You fuck, I wasn't ready."

"Wonderful that's five misdemeanors; or one felony and one extra misdemeanor. Your dad told me he would come up here, and pay a visit, to anyone who got a felony, after I was finished with them. I believe I am done with you for now. I will collect what you owe me at a time and place of my choosing."

"My father isn't here now. Would you please help me remove my offenses, and get me below the felony mark?"

"Are you asking me to lie to your father, because you couldn't keep control of your mouth?"

"Yes."

"What would I get out of this? Your father will probably fire me if he finds out. I like your father, and I would like to learn from him."

"I can offer you a constant stream of sex while we are in Barbados. Sandi, Danni, Debbie, and I will keep you smiling for two solid weeks."

"I can't accept that. I won't let three other women pay off your crime. I will reduce your infractions to two. However, you belong to me from today until the end of your sister's term in the Congress. If, as I am told, she runs for president and is elected, you belong to me until the end of her term."

"You are out of your fucking mind Robert. I'd rather have my father beat me up, than become your sex slave."

"I knew you'd say that. I wanted to see what your body look like, when we come back from Barbados nice and tanned, and you will be beautifully bruised. I'll tell your father I'm finished with you, and about your felony and extra misdemeanor. I'm sure he will be very proud of you as he walks up the stairs."

"I'll give you three years."

"I won't bother responding to that insult."

"I'll give you five years and not a day longer."

"I'll think about it.

Resume the appropriate position, and I will finish your punishment for today."

"Yes sir."

Cindi spread herself across the bed, turned her head to the left and her hands behind her back.

Robert yelled, "Spread your legs. Wider, wider, dammit."

Before Cindi knew what happened to her he showed three fingers inside her. Those fingers played on the roof of her slick canal searching for G spot, and had his thumb inside her ass. He started twisting and turning his hand, while pumping it in and out of her pussy. 

She didn't realize she was still so close to the edge, and he was bringing her to her climax extremely fast. 

Then, just like the last time, he pulled his hand out of her, and stopped.

"Please, Robert, don't stop. You promised me you wouldn't stop."

He looked at her but didn't answer. His fingers moved slowly, and grazed the little red bud. It was bright like a cherry, begging to be plucked. It wasn't what she wanted though. She wanted to be fucked, and he was going to give her what she wanted. More than that, she needed it. He moved the handle of the paddle under the area of her need. He moistened the end of the paddles handle. When it was slick enough he moved it into position. He tortured her entrance with it, as his finger played with her asshole. 

She felt it there, and thrust her hips down, trying to impale herself on the hard object.

"Stay still baby or I will put it away."

"Yes sir, hurry please; I'm desperate, I need it inside me."

Robert inserted the handle slowly, very slowly, into her waiting sex. Her back stiffened as if he was moving a tree into her. He was only halfway in when he started pulling it out, and pushed it back in marginally deeper.

She shouted, "Faster."

"Was that an order?"

"No sir, it was a plea.

He didn't want to hurt her, because the edges on the leather strapping were ragged. Again he did what she asked him to do; he plunged the handle as deep as it would go, and left it there.

She burrowed her head into the mattress and screamed, "Oh God, thank you," as she orgasmed."

He whispered, "You're welcome."

Cindi was trying to curse at him, but she was still in the throes of her mind numbing orgasm, and her mouth was not working. 

Descending out of its suite embrace, Robert pulled the handle halfway out of her body. He waited until he felt her muscles grab it. He plunged it back as deep inside her as it would go, until the shaft bottomed out. 

Cindi's grunted, and her eyes popped open.

Robert twisted the head of the paddle 360 degrees, several times, as fast as his hands could move. With the sensations of the bottom of the paddle scraping against her cervix and the rough ridges of the leather straps digging into the sidewalls of her vagina, her nervous system imploded. Seconds later, she went thermonuclear.

Her mouth opened, but no sound found its way out. It was stuck in her throat until all the air in her lungs burst through. Like thunder after a lightning strike, she screamed. It was so loud, and lasted so long, Robert covered his ears. 

Afterwards, Cindi curled up into a ball, holding the paddle deep inside her. She was not letting it go.

He kissed the top of her head as she lay on her bed attempting to figure out how he did that to her. 

Robert whispered into her ear, "After you shower, I think you'll need to change the sheets. There is a puddle a foot around under your ass."

Cindi replied, "If I didn't want this paddle where it is right now, I would be beating the shit out of you with it."

"That is number six. If you have a date book, put me down and let me know when and where. My sisters have been promising to do that to me for years. I would love to add you to that list. At your advanced age and current position, it should be easy."

"Advanced age my ass, when was the last time you ran a marathon?"

"About 8 ½ weeks ago, I ran against Michigan State, Indiana, and Notre Dame. I came in 17th. Do you have any other questions Cindi?"

She looked at him in shock. "I'm tired, I have to take a shower and clean up my room. My sister is waiting for you, I hope she's chops your nuts off."

"Somehow I don't think that it's going to work out that way. I should shove my cock up your tight ass right now, for making that statement. I will wait until we get back from Barbados. You will be so happy to see us, I'll fuck your ass in front of your mother and father. I'm sure they will love watching it happen live and you loving every minute of it."

"You cock sucking son of a bitch."

"I wonder what the punishment is for 7 misdemeanors. Has anyone ever reached two felonies in the same day? I could stay here another few minutes and I'm sure you will make one more mistake during that time. I can't imagine what your father would do to you when I told him you had two felonies against you."

"Please don't. If you tell my father I went up to seven misdemeanors, he will be so disappointed with my behavior I don't think he will ever forgive me."

"As I said before, I'll think about it, I really don't think five years of your life is enough for what you said to me, and how disappointed your father will be in you."

*************************

Sharon kissed Fred. 

"That was Cindi's cry dear. Apparently Robert knows how to use a paddle very effectively."

"Yes dear, it's been a long time since I heard our baby girl cry out like that. I believe we may have found my replacement."

"Fred, you are still the sexiest man alive. Your daughters will never give you up, and neither will I. Your dick is not going into retirement, until it falls off."

"Am I allowed to slow down a little so I don't suffer a heart attack? After all, I am already past the halfway point of being a 'SEXAGENARIAN', and getting closer every year to being a 'SEPTUAGENARIAN."

"If you don't stop using those big words, I'm going to stick a needle through your tongue. Why can't you be like a normal person and say your 66, closing in on 70?"

"You just hit the nail on the head dear; when did you ever think I was normal?"

Sharon kissed him again. "Never Fred, not since the day you opened the door at the hotel, and told me I was stunning. You stole my heart that day, and I don't ever want it back. You can slow down with the girls, but not with me. You are my husband, and I waited a long time to find you."

"Excuse me madam, you have that backwards. You were married when I met you. I waited a long time to meet you. If you argue with me on this point, I'll have Robert spank you the way he is spanking the girls."

"Your heart attack would come sooner rather than later if you tried that with me."

"Are you objecting to one of my commands darling?"

"You can bet your ass I am."

"Good because I'm not sharing you with anyone."

*************

Sandi was sleeping when he walked into her room. She was in the same position Cindi was in, so Robert decided to wake her up rudely. He slammed her bedroom door.

Her head popped off the mattress and saw him standing there.

"What are you doing here?"

"Stay where you are, I'm going to tell your father you questioned another one of his decisions. I'm sure he will be very pleased to take over for me."

"Don't do that please; you just startled me."

"Did your father give you permission to sleep while you were waiting for your punishment?"

"No sir, he didn't."

"I will make this easy on you, and make it your decision this time and this time only. We can raise the punishment to 15 strokes, or we can call it number one. Which do you want? Cindi reached Number 7. She is not going to Barbados. Your father is in her room now. His blood pressure must've been through the roof when he went in there. His face was deep red, and he did not look very happy with her."

"Oh shit, Cindi is in trouble."

"That's one or two, whichever you choose."

"I'll take the 15 sir."

"I believe that's an excellent choice since we have not started yet. Why are your legs so close together?"

"I have a little problem."

"Cindi had the same problem. Apparently it runs in your family. Spread your legs and let's get started. Put your hands behind your back, and your head to the left. Count out each stroke, and don't bite the sheet. If you do, I add one stroke for each time you do it. Tell me when you're ready."

Not only did Sandi have the same problem as her sister, the lips surrounding her vagina were red and inflamed. He wondered how they could walk without cuming. Her clitoris was bigger than Cindi's, which would be helpful in identifying who he was in bed with, when that happened. She was also shaved clean from her pussy to her asshole also. A curious thought went through his mind; he wondered if they shaved each other.

"I'm ready sir."

"He hit her as hard as he hit Cindi, but Sandi forgot to count."

"Do you want to know why you're getting 15 more Sandi?"

"Oh shit I forgot to count."

Robert whispered into her ear, 'THAT'S ONE.' Would you like me to put something in your mouth so you can control it?"

"No sir, I know what you're thinking, and it's not going to happen."

"You are wrong again. I was not thinking about a blowjob or face fuck. I was thinking of a pair of socks or something comfortable to keep you from going to number three and facing your father after he was finished with your sister. If that's all you think of me, I believe it is in your best interest not to hire me."

"My father didn't hire you?"

"Your father and I had a wonderful conversation. He left the hiring up to you. It's your campaign. You have to hire your staff not him. Brace yourself, I'm starting again."

Robert hit her with everything he had in him, and she screamed so loud the whole house knew it. He hit her twice more in quick succession and she was in such pain she forgot to count again.

"We are going back to number 14 Sandi; do you know why?"

"Dammit, I forgot to count because I was in such pain."

"Doesn't your father hit you as hard as I do?"

"My dad hasn't hit me in a long time. I have forgotten what it feels like."

"Your campaign is going to be harsher than this spanking. You better get used to it. They are going to go after your past with a fine toothcomb. They are going to ask you about your biological father; and how he supposedly raped you. They are going to ask why you or your mother didn't report it. They are going to say it never happened and you are a fraud. Why are you dripping all over the bed?"

"It happens when I get punished, it always has."

"Are you ready? How many more do you have coming?"

"14 sir; I will count each one of them."

"Make sure you do Sandi, I would like to be finished with you before dinner."

Robert hit her one more time at half speed.

"Spread your legs dammit."

"Yes sir, I'm sorry sir."

Robert collected the juices that were flowing out of her pussy to lubricate the handle of the paddle. He took aim at her clit, and began tapping it repeatedly.

Sandi screamed, "NO!"

"Are you telling me not to do what your father told me I was allowed to do?"

"You're killing me, please stop, I'm going to cum."

"Okay."

He stopped, just as she requested, and didn't touch her.

"Okay, I'm finished. You are not allowed to touch yourself. You owe me 14 strokes at a time and place of my choosing. If you argue with me I will tell your father. You can get dressed, and go downstairs to your mother. I doubt very much your father is finished with Sandi."

"Robert please you can't leave me like this. I will die if you do. Finish me please, I am right on the edge, and if I don't cum I will go insane."

"You told me not to touch you, and I have acceded to your wishes. I always do what the woman asks me to do. The woman is always in control. I have never done anything to a woman she has not asked me to do. You asked me not to touch you and I will not touch you."

"Robert if you let me get off the bed, I will get on my knees and plead with you to help me cum. I will put it in writing if you want. I will absolve you of all criminal action. Please help me."

"Okay, if you insist, just don't make a habit out of this."

He put the paddle down and got on his knees behind her. He spread the lips of her vulva, sucked her clitoris between his lips, and bit it.

Sandi exploded like a rocket out of control after liftoff. Her scream was loud enough to shake the pots on the stove making dinner.

Sharon looked at Fred. "I think Robert is going to be able to take the stress of the campaign off our two girls very nicely. I haven't heard them yell that loudly in a very long time."

"Yes dear, it's nice having friends at the University of Michigan, who know what's going on in the student population. He is a legend there. I didn't realize, until quite recently, that he had connections through your uncle. It was very fortuitous for us."

"That was very sneaky too dad. It wasn't nice keeping that information from us."

"I am a judge; I am not required to expose information to lawyers. Besides that, certain people used to tell me that 'I hate lawyers'."

"It's still not fair. He played me like a violin, and from the sounds of my sister, he just played her like a Stradivarius."

"That will teach you not to judge a book by its cover. Just because he's rich doesn't make him spoiled or a brat. A 3.6 GPA and he didn't open a book for three years. Can you imagine what he would have done if he studied?"

"You mean we busted are asses to get through law school, and he got a Master's Degree without opening a book."

"He was too busy bedding every female who asked him. There are approximately 24,000 females at Ann Arbor. He didn't discriminate between race, color, or creed. He was the most sought after commodity at the school. He had to buy condoms by the gross."

"That's disgusting dad."

"Are you sure? The female population was fighting to get to him, not the other way around. What makes that disgusting?"

"Is he that good?"

"I wouldn't know; I don't play for that team."

***************

"Sir, Sandi fell asleep after we finished sir. Do you want me to leave her as she is, or wake her up?"

"Good job Robert, she rarely reacts that way. Let her sleep for a little while. I will wake her up in an hour if she does not wake up before then."

"How did Cindi do?"

Cindi looked at him with pleading eyes. She desperately wanted to go to Barbados with her family. She knew her fate was in Robert's hands.

"She was very surprised to see me sir, and immediately let out an expletive, before she could control her mouth. As soon as I said, 'That's one'; she froze and only made one more mistake. You trained her very well sir."

"Why did she scream Robert?"

"She was in the position you required, and I saw she was dripping. I thought it was very unusual for someone who was about to get punished. I hit her once and the flow increased. I turned the paddle around and tortured her with the handle. That's how she came up with the second violation. As she had her orgasm she said an expletive as she went over the top. I wasn't sure if I should count it or not, but I decided to leave that up to you."

"Well done Cindi, I'm very proud of you. Why don't you set the table while Robert and I talk in the den?"

***************

"How are things going with your father and the spacecraft in Texas, Robert?"

"As I understand it, the spacecraft is moving along swimmingly. The major problem is at my home. Laura, my older sister, and my mother are having a devil of a time working on STASIS. They went to Canada to study something called, "Wood Frogs," because they can survive the Arctic winter, and rejuvenate themselves in the spring and summer. I have no clue how that is going to help them, but they seem to think it will. They have been working on it for more than three years and every test they run winds up killing the host. I know Laura is very upset with it. If they don't come up with a solution soon, it will put the program back years."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 17



"Did your mother or sister read the Japanese protocols on Stasis that were done back in the 1970s and 80s, when they were first dreaming up their deep space programs? They hadn't put their first satellite in orbit, but it was typical oriental thinking. They always plan 20 to 30 years advance. That's why they nearly put the American automobile companies out of existence with their small, fuel-efficient automobiles."

"I do not believe my mother or sister even know those protocols exist sir. Would it be all right if I make another phone call, and you can tell my mother what you told me?"

"Go ahead Robert; I would be pleased to talk to her."

**************

"Fred, are we talking about my son, or did someone else show up at your house?"

"Patti, I have more friends at Michigan then you do. Your boy is extremely bright, and when I get finished with him he is going to dazzle the political landscape."

"How have you been feeling lately Fred? Has anyone hit you with a baseball bat? Robert hasn't opened a book since high school."

"I'm surprised he opened one then. Did you know he's photographic?"

"Stop pulling my leg Fred, he has problems using a cell phone."

"It's easy to fool a mother or siblings if you want to, especially if you want to look lazy and have other people do your jobs for you."

"I'll kill that son of mine. Everyone has been doing his work for him, because nobody thought he could do it for himself."

"Do you see what I mean Patricia, if you can get away with it, why not?"

"Did you know I have a gun, and a permit to use it?"

"You shouldn't have told me that Patty, now I have to recuse myself when it comes to your death penalty sentence."

"Wait until I tell my husband he's been fooling us all these years. He'll beat the shit out of him."

"Can I get to the reason I called now please?"

"I can't wait to hear this."

"Did you read the Japanese protocols on deep space travel written in the 70s and 80s?"

"The Japanese didn't have a space program during that time."

"As I just finished telling Robert, the Japanese think 30 years ahead. They may not have had rockets or satellites, but they knew deep space travel required sleeping for a long period of time. I don't know what they found, but while I was at Harvard I read everything, and anything that came past me. I think it would be worth a look, because Robert said you're in trouble."

"Trouble is too nice a word for what we're in. I would read a comic strip at this point if it would help us."

"In that case, there is always 'Brewster Rockit: Space Guy.' He's in the paper every day."

"The Chief Justice of the Supreme Court reads the comic strips?"

"We all do. Have you ever heard the arguments we have to listen to every day, day after day? They are so filled with bull crap we have to leave our shoes on the mats as we leave the court. We hear five minutes worth of evidence and 55 minutes worth of garbage. It's disgraceful. Even when we ask them questions, they dance around the issue and throw bull crap at us. Sometimes I wonder if they really went to law school."

"No wonder they give you guys off for the summer. It takes that long to get the stuff off your pants. Enjoy your vacation in Barbados, if we need the aircraft, we will let you know and send a replacement to bring you home."

"Thank you Patty, I hope this information helps you."

"Any port in a storm Fred; and right now we need a port desperately."

(For now, you will have to read 'Honor Thy Mother and Thy Father' to find out what goes on in Barbados. I am not going to start off on another tangent at this point except to say Robert starts off very well when he joins the Hastings family and the beginning of the campaign. When my current story is completed, I believe this will be the beginning of my next venture. I have not picked a title for it yet, nor have I decided if it will be my next story. However I have always liked these characters, and there is a built in storyline to continue following." P_D10)

****************

"It was a shame we had to get rid of him sir; he was beginning to become a standup guy."

 

"He would have always been an anchor around our necks Paul. He saw all our faces and knew how we operated. This way he died a national hero and will always be remembered as such. They will probably bury him in Arlington, with full honors.

Now we have to find a way to pull off Williams plan. If it works, it will be a thing of beauty. We will be able to retire in style."

"Do you mean it Colonel; this is going to be our last one."

"This is going to be my last one Paul. If you want to take over this operation, it is up to you. You have the brains and the experience to do it. Our team will follow you, because they respect you. You haven't spent one dollar of the millions you have in the bank. I want you to live long enough to spend it. When we finish this job each member will get between $20 and $40 million depending on longevity. You will get $150 million, and I will be getting $250 million. It's not a bad payday. William has been more than generous with us, and we have come through for him every time. I don't want to break that record, and I want us to part friends. We have to do this job perfectly, down to the last decimal point. I want our equipment triple checked. The rifles cleaned and ready to be re-bored and shot 100 times each afterwards.

Our team will be made up of six men, four women. I want five extraction methods. A family van, a sports car, a sedan, and a beat up old truck. I want a boat on the spur of the Monongahela River, called Cleat Lake at the end of his property. We can make it look like a boat party if they get too close. 

The east side of his estate borders the Cooper Rock State Park. We can get lost in there for a decade if we have to.

There is plenty of ground cover. There are trees everywhere surrounded by brush, for that all around 'good ole boy' look. We have to find out if there are any sensors on the property. I don't think so, because there are a lot of animals roaming free in that area. Check for cameras in the trees, especially infrared. You know the drill; why am I explaining it to you?"

"Habit sir, you've been doing it for 23 years, why stop now?"

"I guess I will miss it after this one is over, but this is my last one."

"Where are we going to live sir?"

"Am I going to have to kill you to get away from you?"

"I certainly hope not Colonel. Who is going to write on my headstone, 'I can hear you Sergeant' if you're not here to do it."

"How about Vancouver Island Sergeant?"

"It's an island, isn't it?"

"That's a great way to get shot Paul."

"It was my way of telling you I know nothing about it sir."

"There is plenty of hunting and fishing up there, but most of all there are trees. I expect you to count each and every one of them."

"As you wish sir; I have not disobeyed one of your orders since we met. I'll be damned if I'm going to start now."

"Assemble our team, I will do a quick briefing, and we will meet in Morgantown."

"Yes sir."

"Paul, bring six alternates just in case this thing goes sideways. This one has got to go perfectly, and there is plenty of money to go around."

"Yes sir."

***************

"You do know what's going to happen when I see my son don't you?"

"I'm sorry Steph, you are fourth online. I'm first, then Laura, Anna and you. The girls did all his chores for him for so many years they want to take pieces out of his hide. He has fooled each and every one of us. If it wasn't Fred, I would've had my doubts, but there is no smarter man then Fred Hastings. Robert could not pull the wool over his eyes in such a short period of time. Fred said they had a wonderful conversation and he was very impressed by Robert's depth of knowledge. I almost fell on the floor when he said it. I'm going to kill that boy. For 10 years I yelled, screamed, begged, and bribed him to study, learn about computers, do his math homework, and so many other things a good parent does. All that time he has been laughing at us behind our backs. He did that to aggravate me and to get all of us to do things for him. It worked Stephano; I'm going to kill him."

"I will miss you when you're in jail."

"It will be justifiable homicide, and I will have the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court on my side."

"I don't know what he did when he met Fred, but I would die to have a transcript of it."

"Maybe he'll have to come home to get as clothes?"

"Do you think he would be that stupid after what he's done during his college years? He will probably never set foot in New York again."

"It doesn't mean we can't go to Maryland."

"Yes, that will be fun. Tell me when and I will meet you there."

********************

Laura yelled, "Mom come down here you have to read this."

"Don't make me read the whole thing; give me a synopsis of what you read for the last three hours."

"How could they have had the answer to stasis without having a rocket? They didn't test it, because their government wouldn't fund it. We were on the right track, but it would have taken us another few years to crack the code. It took them 14 years to do it, because they didn't have the computers we have now. They hadn't launched their first satellite into orbit yet. Now we have to build the unit they envisioned. We can update it with new materials to make it better. While we're doing that we can search for a volunteer to go to sleep for a year."

"You don't have to search anywhere, you have your volunteer."

They turned around and Junie was smiling at them.

Patti said, "No Junie, you've been through enough in your young life. Let us find someone else to do it."

"Patty, if Delicious had not saved me from my father I would still be his personal whore. I might as well have been dead, because that's the way I felt. When I needed help again she sent me into your arms, and you welcomed me like family. I have never had that feeling before. My mother died when I was seven years old. I was kept locked up in that house to make sure I was pure when I reached my 13th birthday. You know the rest of the story. Please let me do this, I want to pay you back for your kindness."

"Junie, you have no idea what the downside is to this experiment. You could die. You could wake up, and your bones could be dust because of lack of use. Your muscles could atrophy. We just don't know all the bad things that could happen to you."

"Wouldn't you be telling these same things to the stranger who volunteered? Is it because you know me that you're afraid that something bad will happen to me and not him? Don't you think that's unfair?"

"I won't let you do it Junie, I'll do it myself first."

"Now doesn't that make a lot of sense, Laura? How many years have you put into this project? If you go into the chamber, and you die, all the knowledge you've gained dies with you. If I die, you can do an autopsy, and find out where you went wrong and fix it. This wonderful mission depends on you and your mom getting it right. Use me, and don't let me die in there."

"I have a better idea mom, let's put Robert in there."

"Anna as much as I agree with you, I'm going to have to let that pass. We need a volunteer, and somehow I don't see your brother volunteering for this assignment."

"I have always forged his signature mom, and you never noticed."

"Yes I did. I just never said anything, because it was to my advantage not to get into an argument with him."

"It's decided then; I am the guinea pig. I do not want a pink sarcophagus. I want something lively, and vibrant. A bright gold or orange, something that will make me stand out in the dark. I don't want anyone tripping over me. Oh, would you have someone dust me off every week or two?"

Callum threw her over his shoulder and smacked her on her rump. 

She screamed, "What was that for?"

"I don't like dusting. Now I'm going to have to dunk you in the deep end of the pool because you gave me a job to do."

"I don't have a bathing suit on."

"I do."

"Callum put me down."

"Trust me, I will, way down, approximately 10 feet below the surface."

"You wouldn't dare do that to me."

Laura said, "That was the wrong thing to say Junie. Hold your nose you're going for a swim."

Callum walked up the stairs, carrying Junie like she was a matchstick. Everyone followed behind them, laughing, while she was kicking her feet and yelled at him to put her down.

Callum asked her, "Why aren't you using your jujitsu on me, like you were going to use on Robert?"

"If you had a brain in your head, instead of a muscle, you would realize I didn't know jujitsu."

Cassie said, "OOOOOhhhhhhh, good one Junie."

As they reached the pool Callum said, "Do you want me to jump off the side, or the diving board?"

"It doesn't matter to me, because I'm not going."

"Do you want to bet on that?"

"My body may go, but my mind is staying above the water."

"If you don't mind my saying so, your mind is all wet."

He walked to the diving board, took her off his shoulders, and placed her in front of him. He turned, and looked her in the eye. "Junie Penick, you are the bravest woman I have ever known."

He put his lips against hers and kissed her passionately.

Her arms flailed out to the sides not knowing how to react to someone who was kissing her for her pleasure, rather than kissing her because he owned her. She felt it all the way down to her toes.

She lost her balance grabbed him and they both fell into the pool awkwardly.

There were peals of laughter especially from Christian.

"He's teaching me how to do that. I've been practicing on Cassy. I'm doing very well."

"You haven't touched me you moron."

"Oh yes I have, but it's been so good you can't remember a thing."

"Do you want to wind up in the pool like Callum?"

"I bet you can't do that to me."

"Listen puffy, you are an easy mark compared to Callum."

"Shall we go to the diving board and find out little sister?"

"Getting ballsy aren't we big brother?"

"You said I was an easy mark, prove it."

****************

Callum helped Junie out of the pool. She went to swing at him for getting her wet, but he caught her arm and pulled it behind her back. He kissed her again.

"Why are you kissing me?"

"I'm kissing you because I like you, I like you very much. It's not because I feel sorry for you, because of what happened to you with your father. It's not because I'd like to get into your pants, at least not right now. I genuinely like you, and as I said before, I think you are one of the bravest women I have ever known. I don't know how you survived all those years under your father's oppression. It says volumes about your courage. You have tasted freedom for just more than a month, and now you are offering yourself up for an experiment that could kill you. Women fighting in the military have nothing on you Junie Penick, you are one awesome woman. Beware, I'm going to kiss you again."

She squeaked, "Okay!"

He did, but this time she joined in. Her arms reached around his neck, as his reached around her waist and brought her body to his erection. 

It was such a touching scene, a hush fell over the pool area.

When they broke apart, Junie's face was bright red. Her blood pressure was at a record high, and she felt the erection of a man who wanted her but was not going to take her without her permission.

"I think I need a drink of water."

"Sit down by the table; I'll go inside and get you a glass."

Anna yelled. "Do you see what you did to that poor girl Callum?"

"Be quiet Anna that was my first real kiss. It was really nice, very, very nice."

Anna laughed, "Let me know when your toes uncurl."

****************

Christian said, "Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry the gentleman is no longer here. Ladies, my sister will now push me into the pool."

"Take your position Cassie."

"What position asshole?"

"We are going to take the same positions Junie and Callum were in. Then you are going to throw me into the pool; right?"

"Oh, right."

"Are you ready Cassie?"

"Yes I am."

"My sister will now throw me in the pool. I am ready."

Cassie made a grab for Christian's stomach.

Christian took a step back, and dropped to one knee. Cassie's arms flew over his shoulders, and his hands grabbed her tiny hips. He lifted her into the air as she cursed at him. 

Cassie tried desperately to find something to hold onto besides his hair.

Christian bent his knees, sprang up, and threw his little sister high into the air. On her way down she screamed, "Oh fuck!"

She hit the water in a very unladylike position, and for a very tiny girl, she made a huge splash.

When she surfaced, she received a huge round of applause. She looked around for her brother to give him a piece of her mind. In horror saw him running up the diving board.

She yelled, "Christian No!"

He sprang off the end of the diving board, high into the air, and on his way into the water, did a perfect cannonball, landing within a few feet of her. The volume of water he displaced pulled her under the water with him.

When she surfaced the second time, she was spitting out a mouthful of water again.

As she cleared the water from her eyes, she said, "I'm going to kill that...."

Christian grabbed both her ankles and pulled her underwater for the third time.

She surfaced 15 seconds later. Christian had her in a lifeguard crawl, with his arm under her shoulder and her head resting on his chest. He towed her to the shallow end of the pool, helped her to her feet, and up the steps. 

He sat her down next to Junie, while everyone laughed. 

To add insult to injury he asked his baby sister, "Cassie would you like a little more water to drink?"

"You bastard; I'll get you for that."

"You were the one who said you could push me into the pool, weren't you?"

"Yes I was."

"Was I within my rights to prove you wrong?"

"Yes, but did you have to drown me in the process?"

"It was an object lesson. You will never tell anyone you can push me off the diving board, and into the water again will you?"

"No I won't, I'll just tell them I can beat you and everything else."

"That is your prerogative, until I beat you at everything else, and put you back in your place."

"You can't beat me at anything."

"What do you want to lose at next?"

"I'll tell you in the morning."

"It's going to take you that long to figure out the one thing you can beat me at?"

"There's a long list of things I can beat you at. Right now I'm water logged, because some jackass tried to drown me. We will pick this up tomorrow. "

"I guess that makes sense to someone who's going to lose."

Callum returned with a large glass of ice water and handed it to Junie.

"Thank you Callum, would you like to take the horses out for a ride?"

"Aren't you a little wet?"

"By the time you finish saddling the horses, I will have changed and I'll be ready to go."

"I have to change also."

"So let's both change and take the horses out for a ride."

Callum smiled, "Do you want to change in my room?"

"Maybe in a year or so."

"I'll wait; I'm not in any hurry."

"Really, you'll wait?"

"You are the first woman I can say I feel that way about. Yes, I'll wait."

"If you wait for me, I'll wait for you."

"That's not funny Junie, you'll be sleeping."

"No, I'll be dreaming; about you."

"In that case let's make the most of the time we have together. I'll give you a few things to dream about."

Callum took Junie by the hand and they walked slowly back to the house.

Laura yelled, "Junie can't go into stasis pregnant."

"Don't worry about a thing Laura. We won't be going that far. We are just going to give her some wonderful memories for her to dream about while she is in stasis."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 17



As they entered the house, Cassie said, "I can't believe this. Love has finally hit that big lug. I've never seen him act this way before. I don't know whether to be happy or sad. I always wanted it to be me, but I've known for years it was never going to happen. He's known Junie for a month, and I'll wager that cowboy is down for the count."

Laura said, "Three kisses do not make a marriage."

"When he initiates kisses like that in public, he is serious. Like Anna said, those kisses were 'toe curlers.' He saves those very special people. I never got one."

"Is my baby sister jealous?"

"You know damn well I am. I would have hopped into his bed anytime he asked, but he never did. I'm the sister he never had, and I can't tell you how much I hated it."

Patty put her arms around her and kissed her head. "There is a great guy out there looking for you, he just hasn't found you yet. You've been so wrapped up looking at Callum, you never saw him. Now you can look at everyone else that is worthy of you. Don't rush yourself; you are very young, and gorgeous beyond measure."

"Thanks Aunt Patty, I think I'll call my mom and tell her what's going on."

"Should someone call Susan and Alan and give them a heads up?"

Christian said, "It will be my pleasure. No wait one minute; Cassie have mom call Alan and tell him the news. She will enjoy this immensely. She will finally have something over him. She can torment him instead of the other way around. Mom will love you for it."

"Christian that is the most unchristian thing I've ever heard you say. It is positively marvelous. I wonder if mom will do it in church."

"Now that would be mean, marvelous, but mean. He would chase her out of the pulpit and around the sanctuary. The bishop would have homilies for a year talking about those two."

"You two talk to your mother. We have to make up a supply list to build two stasis units. We will test one on a monkey for one month and see how that goes. Then we will put Junie in the full-size model for one year. No one can know about this test, except for Doctor Luck. This cannot go public. The government will shut us down before we start, because we did not follow the FDA procedures. It would take seven years to do that, and more if they don't like what they see.

I think it's time for some trickery. If they get word of it, the first place they are going to look is down in our labs. We are going to be hard at work trying to figure out how to put people into stasis. Come on people we have work to do."

***************

77. The Redcoats Are Coming

It's not often that humans are smarter than computers but the 100 electrical workers had been trained so well they found flaws in the CAD produced schematics for the electrical systems. When they did, all work stopped in that area.

When the supervisor came over and told them to do it the way the schematic showed, the electrical workers said no, because it is wrong. The supervisor called the section chief. He ordered electricians to do it the way it showed on the schematic and again they refused.

"The six of you are fired. Leave the site immediately."

"Call Delicious Thyme and let her know about your decision. We are not going to kill her, you are."

The men left the 'Beach Ball' and waited with security for Delicious to arrive. 20 minutes later she did. Her agent opened the door, and she walked straight to them.

"Hi guys what's up?"

"Teach, you told us in class if we found something wrong not to do it and bring it to the attention of our supervisor. We did, and he told us to do it the way it was shown. It's wrong, we know it's wrong and we won't do it that way. He bumped it up to line, and we got the same results. They fired us. We don't want you to die because we did something wrong. The schematic is wrong; we are right."

"Let's go inside and find out. Maybe I'll fire a supervisor, and a section chief, for trying to kill me and my family."

They formed a phalanx behind her as she walked towards the area in question. The section chief said to her, "I fired these men, they are not allowed in this area."

"George, if these men are right, and you are wrong, you will be picking up your paycheck instead of them. I trained these men, and I told them to stop everything if they found a defect. They found one, and now they're going to prove it to me. Bring it up on the computer, and I hope you have enough money saved to hold you over until your next job."

Jack said, "Follow this circuit, it goes to this terminal, it should come out here, proceed to this junction and proceed to this breaker. Instead it bypasses the breaker, and proceeds to the next two junction boxes and joins at the next breaker. It will work just fine until this feeder line from the Arboretum is activated. The pumps for the water and the lighting for the plants may or may not cause an overload, but if it does you have a fire here behind this wall. It is in the worst possible spot in this section. It would take at least 40 minutes to get to it, and by that time it is out of control and the ship is lost. All we wanted to do is bring the line to the correct breaker, and these two assholes told us to do it the way the schematic showed it."

"What do you have to say for yourself now George? You just destroyed a $400 billion project and killed 70 people, because you wouldn't listen to superbly trained electrical workers. If they tell you it's wrong, it's wrong. I trained them for the better part of the year to know it's wrong. They are not infallible, but they are as close to it as any human can be. Did you give them a chance to show you what they showed me?"

"No I didn't. I looked at the schematic and it looked fine to me."

"Now that the spaceship blew up a couple of million light years away, what do you think? You can't apologize to me, or my father, and all the families that are on board because we are dead. You are down here, drinking beer, thinking what a wonderful job you did by firing six electrical workers who were correct, and you were wrong. Are you a rich man George; can you afford to lose this job?"

"No ma'am, I can't afford it. Alimony is killing me."

"The next time one of my electrical workers tells you there's a problem, listen to them. Have them show you where it is, and why it's a problem. If you still don't see it, call me, and I will decide if it is a problem or not. Apologize to these men, because they didn't deserve the treatment you gave them. When you see their supervisor, I expect him to be six inches shorter, and his tongue tied to his teeth when he apologizes to them."

"Yes ma'am."

"Guys, would you tell George what the passing grade was in my class."

"100 percent George; anything else you were fired."

"George the men and women who are working on this project are the cream of the crop. They will go out into the field and teach their coworkers and newcomers how to read schematics and to put everything together properly. Congratulations guys; great work, now get back to work. You've goofed off enough for one day."

"Slave driver."

George said, "I'm sorry guys I didn't see the flaw, and my mouth overloaded my brain. It won't happen next time. I'll let you show it to me, like you did Mrs. Thyme, before I make a decision."

"That's all we need George, she drilled it into us every day, because she's going to be on this 'Bubble'. She doesn't want to die on it, and it's not going to be our fault if something goes wrong."

"It's not going to be my fault either, I'll make sure it."

****************

I was sitting at my desk when my secure phone rang for the umpteenth time this morning. How did anyone expect me to get work done without going through my secretary?

"Yes."

"Even, Patti Valentino, stasis solved tell no one." The phone line went dead.

I looked at the phone wondering if it was a crank call but I knew her voice and knew there must be a reason behind her request for absolute secrecy. I decided to test it by speaking to Stephano later today. If it was truly solved our last major hurdle to climb into the stars was behind us. Everything else was doable, it just would take time, and that we had plenty of.

Every time I would walk onto the ship on Sunday, the second floor was becoming a warren of piping, electrical lines, the fiber-optic, pumps, a waste treatment plant, and a recycling plant. The amazing thing was it was all coming together quickly. Between the people and materials sent to us by Celeste and Philip Castronova, for miniaturization, and Dycke and Payne Schneider for the assembly of my "Beach Ball" our vision of the future was coming to life in rapidly.

I could hear a ruckus coming from behind me. It could only be those two children fighting with each other again. I couldn't decide which one was getting worse. Was a Gray getting younger, or Gordon getting older; they were constantly razzing each other. All I could tell today is that they were running towards me.

I turned around and yelled, "Would you two infants stop it already."

Gray yelled, "Gordon stole a telex out of my hands. I didn't get a chance to read it, and he started running here. I know it's good otherwise he would've given it back to me."

"Gordon, give Gray back is telex."

"Okay dad, but it was nothing important. It only says 15 Exascale computers are on their way and should arrive Thursday."

"I'm going to kill that little runt," Gray shouted. "I've been waiting for that confirmation for two weeks, and he steals it from me. I was supposed to tell you that."

"Is it really that important who tells me we're getting the fastest computers in the world? Does it matter that we are getting computers with chips made on slices of industrial diamonds? Does it really matter in the long run who tells me except they're finally coming here to be installed in this wonderful machine of ours?"

Gordon and Gray looked at each other. Then they looked at me. Simultaneously, they yelled, "Yes."

"Okay, I was just checking. Check with the Paranal Observatory, in Atacama Peru, Gary. See if they have the latest star charts ready. If they do; see how much the ESO (Europeans Southern Observatory) is going to charge us for them."

"Gordon call the NEST, tell them I want the forward areas of the third floor, Sections A13 through C59 completed yesterday. I want these computers installed as soon as the trucks offload them. I don't want them sitting outside the 'Beach Ball' for one second longer than necessary. I don't care what they have to stop doing to get this completed, but I want that area finished and ready to be sealed off as soon as the fifteenth computer is installed, connected, and locked down in place. 

Have all the installation, electrical, technical, and air conditioning section chiefs set up an overtime rotation on a triple time pay basis. I want all this information dispatched by the end of business today."

"Aye, Aye, Captain, I will do it right now."

"Young man how many times do I have to tell you your mother is the captain?"

"On our spaceship too dad?"

"It's just a house that flies."

"It's a very expensive house."

"Men build houses, women make them homes."

******************

Jennifer called me on my cell.

"Hello baby, why don't you come up here, and look at all the wires, conduits, and everything for yourself. You are the 'Master' of this vessel. You are supposed to know where everything is, and where everything goes."

"What am I supposed to do with your children Doctor Luck?"

"Oh I keep forgetting about them."

"If you keep forgetting to come home, you could be missing the three of us. Gordon would stay with you."

"I'm sorry dear, what can I do for you?"

"There are men down here who want to give you televisions."

"We've already purchased three hundred televisions from them."

"They know that, but they didn't know where they were going. Now they do and they want to talk to you about it."

"Why do I have a feeling we're going to have another logo on the outside of the ship?"

"That's not my problem. Get your ass down here, I want a kiss."

"Where do you want it?"

"I'm dropping my pants, you can kiss both cheeks."

"Don't scare the Japanese away dear, I'll be right down."

*********

My wife did not disappoint. She was standing behind the scaffolding, and once I appeared she dropped her pants, and panties, and I kissed both cheeks. What she didn't count on were the guards patrolling the other side of the ship looking our way. They applauded, and she turned red.

"I'm going to kill you Even."

"This was your idea Jen, not mine. I will come home tonight and sample the rest of your tender body, and see if we can add some more kisses to other areas of interest."

"Some areas have forgotten what it feels like husband."

"I am sorry Jen. I am so tied up in this project I'm afraid to leave it."

"Then don't leave it. We are going to be together for ages once we leave this planet. You are going to take me on the adventure of a lifetime. What wife could ask for anything more?"

"A wife like you deserves more than I'm giving her now."

"Even let's go get some televisions and we will catch up on everything later today."

"Where did we meet again?"

"If you forgotten, I'm going to hit you."

"It must've been those trees I hit backwards. It's all coming back to me now. Some woman told me a joke and even I thought it was stupid. She was the first woman I had talked to years. What a mistake that was." (I didn't move fast enough, and it hurt. She continued to hit me all the way to the Japanese contingent. They looked confused.")

I bowed. "Hello gentlemen how may I help you?"

They had a wonderful presentation prepared, and they wanted to help us instead of the other way around. They wanted to equip the entire ship with monitors, two-way radio communication between rooms and essential parts of the ship. The most impressive part of all was they wanted to give us enough external cameras to give us a Globular view of space as we travelled through it. The main view screen would be like a Jumbotron at a sports stadium. It could be broken up into 48 individual screens to look at every point of the compass, plus a large center screen for looking forward. All the screens could also be focused at one area also for a larger view. 

I was in awe of it all. I never dreamed it could be done, and I dreamed big. Then I asked the magic questions, "How much will it cost, and how long will it take to install?"

They were ready for me with both counts.

"Doctor Luck, we will do the installation of our products, and your people can hook them into your grid. Our part will take 13 to 15 months. You can begin connecting each item as soon as it is installed. This way it can be checked immediately.

Then they opened a digital laptop computer and showed my 'Beach Ball' in all its glory. As it turned, at each 90 degrees interval in large letters from north to south was the word, "SONY." The name was larger than the name of the ship.

I turned to the head of the delegation, shook his hand, and said, "No thank you." I took Jen's arm walked away.

I think their entire delegation was stunned. They started talking amongst themselves quickly, attempting to save their plan.

As we reached the scaffolding one of their members reached me and asked me to join them for another conference.

I told him nothing that size was going to be on our ship. I have donors that are giving me billions of dollars to build this craft. I have corporate donors: IBM, Goodyear, Argonne National Laboratory's that were going to have prominence on the exterior of my spacecraft. What you are offering me is a few hundred million dollars. What they have given me, and continue giving me, is in on billions of dollars. You people have some nerve demanding such attention for yourselves.

He beseeched me to come to another conference. 

I acquiesced.

He spoke with his group and explained to them the competition they were up against. They came up with a solution they found acceptable to one another and presented it to me.

They asked that their name be put in a place of honor, for all to see, and the same size along with our other donors.

I told them I could accept that compromise. I also told them the letters U.S.A. would be larger than all other letters, including the ship's name.

They understood that also.

It was a major victory for our program. We had never envisioned any video system like this. I had to call Delicious to make sure we were not overloading the electrical capacity of the ship.

"Dad how can a genius be a dunce? We bought plasma televisions from them three years ago, because they were the top of their line. They have been in storage now because they stopped making them. They kept overheating and burning out after three or four years. I compensated for that with the air-conditioning system to keep them ice cold. Now they are giving us the new LCD screens throughout the ship. They use less electricity, they run cooler, and I don't have to pump as much air-conditioning into the forward deck. We save electricity; we don't expend more."

"That's what I called to tell you. I did you a favor I saved electricity for you."

"If I was there dad I would smack you between the eyes."

"You're not here, that's why I said it. How's my grandson doing?"

"I think he's going to be like you. He keeps trying to open the cabinets and get to the chemicals. I'm sure he's going to make some type of bomb by the time he seven."

"We blew up Rod's bicycle when I was six."

"Please tell me you're joking, I'll have to handcuff Newt."

"When you come to work tomorrow ask Rod. I don't think he's ever forgiven us for doing that to his new bicycle."

"What do you mean us dad; did mom have a hand in it."

"You already know she didn't like Rod. This is one of the ways she proved it. Rod will tell you the story."

"She hated Rod when she was five?"

"Rod was always a pervert. He kept picking up the back of her dress. She got even with him."

"Way to go mom, I am really going to have a good time with him tomorrow morning."

"Keep your running shoes on. He was not happy that day. I will talk to you later baby."

Jennifer was talking with Gordon and Gray when I yelled, "Gray your wife want you home 10 minutes ago. She wants you to work off some of that fat you're putting on. She's putting Newton down for his nap and if you're not there by the time he falls asleep she's going to perform an operation on you. It's called a gelding and it sounds painful."

"I've lost eight pounds since we've been married, and it's not because of her cooking. I should never have introduced her to sex; she's going to drive me to an early grave."

Jennifer kissed him on the cheek. "I feel so sorry for you. All men should have your problem. Get your ass home before you're missing your balls."

"Yes mom, goodbye dad, I'll see you tomorrow at work."

"Mom, how soon can I get in on this?"

"Get in on what Gordon?"

"This sex stuff, everybody's getting it but me."

"That's the way it should be, until you get married."

"That's not what I've been reading; over two thirds of the kids in high school are having sex. I've already graduated high school, and I'm not having sex."

"Life isn't always fair, and if you have any other questions ask your father."

"Dad, when will it be... where did he go mom?"

"Who is the smartest man you know Gordon?"

"Dad is."

"If your father heard me saying 'if you have any other questions about sex ask your father', what might he do if he didn't want to answer it?"

"Disappear."

"Do you see how smart your father is?"

"Delicious always says 'Dad is smarter than the average bear.' One day I'm going to find out what that means."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 17



"I know what it means, but it will be more fun for Delicious to tell you."



The Exascale computers came in Red Boxes, marked with every warning sign you could imagine on them. If there was a warning label made, it was on these boxes, and the men that handled them did exactly what the labels said. They were more precious, rarer than Diamonds ($65,000 per gram), and closer to the cost of Painite, the rarest gem of all ($300,000 per gram).

The Southern Pacific Rail Road closed Route 53 at its crossing for ninety minutes. This crossing was nine miles north of our site. Instead of having these priceless computers offloaded at one of their facilities, reloading them onto trucks, traveling forty-five miles overland, and offloading them again, they came up with this solution.

The computers were packed on springs to absorb vibrations; wrapped in five millimeter thick plastic sheeting to keep dirt from getting inside; and surrounded by foam board to keep them from moving around in their wooden crates. The crates were suction lifted, and gently lowered into huge, plastic formed box, and smothered with foam peanuts. The bottom and top of these units are bolted together and then strapped with four metal bands. The cost of packing each computer was $856.00. No one at the Argonne labs complained, and neither did we.

Three computers fit into one truck, and each truck was guarded by a police escort as it drove to the NEST. Every needed technician was already on the second and third floors to install each computer as it came in. The timeline for each computer was one hour; if everything went as planned. The fiber-optic lines were ready, the air-conditioning lines were ready, the electrical lines were ready, and the exterior generators were on providing electricity through the grid. All they needed now was for the machines to be put in place, hooked up, locked down, and tested. The testing would come later.

Progress was painstakingly slow, at least for those of us who were watching it being done, and could do nothing to help it along. As they brought the fourth computer in, I said to myself, this is nonsense. I'm going home.

Jen heard the car drive up and opened the front door expecting me to tell her there was a disaster. I told her, no, I just came home for dinner, and sex.

"Even are you feeling all right? They are installing the computers today and you don't want to be there."

"It was driving me crazy sitting there with nothing to do. Watching them uncrate those boxes, carry the computers into our ship, and not be able to do anything to help. It was like having a headache; you either do something about it or it gets worse. I did something about it. I came home to my wife and children."

"Where is Gordon?"

"He's at the main building."

"It's 7:30 PM, do you want food or sex first."

"It's a tough choice, but I'll go with food. I'll be leaving early in the morning when the last computer is about to go in. I'll make sure there's a smile on your face when you wake up."

"I always wake up with a smile on my face when I sleep with you."

"What's for dinner?"

"Your favorite, calf's brains with liver with bacon."

"Can we order a pizza?"

"What a great idea, that's what we had for dinner."

"Woman, I'm going to get you for that."

"When are you going to remember I hate liver?"

"It wasn't the liver so much; it was the calf's brains."

"Can't you just see Holden playing with them?"

"Playing with them wouldn't bother me; watching him squish them in his hands would send me running to the bathroom. That boy has no fear."

"Neither does Richard, they are cut from the same cloth, and I worry that between them and Newton, we are going to have to build a jail on our ship to keep them out of trouble."

"Let's eat dinner, then will go into the bedroom and I'll eat dessert."

"What about me?"

"You can have ice cream, or a popsicle."

"I'll take the popsicle."

"Okay, how much pizza is left?"

"One slice."

"You and two small children ate an entire large pizza?"

"I was hungry, and I didn't expect you to come home this early."

I grabbed the pizza out of the box and pointed to the bedroom.

"Don't you get any crumbs on my clean sheets?"

"You're going to have to change the sheets in the morning anyhow. Don't worry about little tomato sauce."

"Promises, promises, promises; all I get from you is promises."

"Once upon a time I promised you I was going to take a piece of your ass, do you remember that?"

"You wouldn't dare."

"You didn't answer my question."

"Yes I remember you saying that, but you wouldn't dare do that to me."

"Shall I count your offenses for this evening? Leaving the one piece of pizza for dinner, and stating that I never bring you to orgasm. Since I seem incapable of doing that via your vagina, it seems the only other option I have is doing it anally. Don't worry dear I'll only put 9/10 of it in. I wouldn't expect you to take the whole thing the first time. We'll save that for tomorrow."

"Will you stay here for one minute; I want to borrow a Marjorie's gun. It may not be as big as yours, but it's a killer."

"I'm sure it is that's why you're not leaving the room without my dick up your ass."

"Even you are so full of shit, you're just trying to scare me."

"Did it work?"

"Yes it did."

"Oh good, I'm getting better at it. Should we shower first or after we get sweaty?"

"After we get sweaty, and you haven't had your dessert yet."

"Where did dessert go, oh where did you hide it? Dessert, dessert, come out of hiding, I'm looking for you."

"Even, stop it. You're going to get your head stuck in my panties. Even put me down. Even you're going to.... Oh fuck!"

**************

"Mommy, why is daddy holding you upside down like that?"

"Errmm, mommy had ants in her pants and daddy was trying to find them."

"Doesn't daddy need light to see ants?"

"Daddy has very good eyesight, and he's holding me very close so he can see if they're running around. Go to bed Richard, I'll be in in a minute to tuck you in."

"I want daddy to do it. He's never home this early, and I want him to read me a story."

"Okay go to bed, daddy will be in in a few minutes."

"I want water too."

"Okay daddy will bring you water too. Go to bed."

***********

"Jen, I believe we forgot to lock the door. A few minutes later and Richard would've joined us in bed. At least you didn't lie to him, you did have ants in your pants, and I was eating them."

"Even, wash your hands and face. Bring your son a glass of water, read him a story, and get your ass back in here. I am on edge. If you don't finish me I will carry on by hand, vegetable, or mechanical device."

I put Jen on her feet, kissed her, and went to take care of my needs. As I was about to leave our room, I looked back at my wife. From a safe distance I said, "I understand squash are in season." I closed the door just in time to be missed by the pillow she threw it me.

**************

"Thanks for the water dad, I was thirsty."

"I thought you might be. What would you like me to read to you tonight?"

"Space Blasters; mom and I started reading it on my Kindle yesterday. We are up to page 19."

"Do you want to read it to me, or do you want me to read it to you?"

"I start reading it, until I get tired, and then mom keeps reading it until I fall asleep. Is that okay?"

"It's perfect my son, absolutely perfect. Why don't we start at page 15 so you can remember where you left off yesterday?"

"Okay. Did you do this with Delicious when she was growing up?"

"Her mom did that with her. She was a terrific mother. Where are you going to start?"

"Right here dad."

************

At 3 AM I left the arms of my beloved, and headed back to the NEST. With the rotation of the manpower, resting facilities on-site, and hot food for the men and women working throughout the evening, everything was going according to plan.

They were unpacking computer number 15 when I arrived on-site. Gordon looked like he was high on Speed. I knew he was so overtired, and he was working on reserve energy. I allowed him to stay, because he was going to program most of the star charts into the computers. Now was the time to send him home.

"Gordon do you want to go home in the backseat of the SUV, or tied up like the last time?"

"Dad this is the last one. Give me one more hour and I'll go home peacefully."

"Look behind you Gordon, your agents are ready to take you home now. Which way do you want to go? You are not working today. If you show up at the office, I will have you thrown out, and you will be in your room for another week. Do we understand each other son?"

"Can I keep my pencils?"

"No pencils, no crayons, no magic markers, and you won't have to paint your walls either, because you will be tied to your bed. You are overtired Gordon, go home and sleep for the rest of the day. I don't want to see you at work until tomorrow."

"Now I know why teenagers don't like their parents. They act like dictators."

"Please remember this dictator could leave you on earth, rather than take you to the stars."

"You wouldn't do that to me dad. I've worked too hard to go with you."

"Are you going home and going to sleep for the rest of the day?"

"Yes dad, I'm going home, and I'll sleep. It doesn't mean I'm not angry with you for being a dictator."

"This dictator loves you very much, and is only thinking about your best interests. If anything ever happened to you, I would be devastated."

We started walking out to the car that would take him home, when he stopped.

"Dad, mom, and I were talking the other day and she said I had to speak to you about this. When am I allowed to start having sex? Nearly 2/3 of all high school students are having sex, and I've already graduated."

"It's not a question of when you are allowed to have sex kid. It's when you meet someone and both of you feel like you would like to be intimate together. It's either because you feel a connection to each other, or because you feel a kind of love for one another. It's not the kind of love that you will want to get married, but a short-term infatuation with each other. You will always want to be safe with the young woman by using a condom, and not a cheap one. Do not be embarrassed to ask me to come with you the first time you want to buy them, or I will buy them for you. I will explain each type to you and their pros and cons. You must remember at all times, if the young woman says the word "NO" you must stop instantly. Talk to me when you are getting near any situation like this, and I will try to help you work your way through the maze of contradictions of young love. You will be 14 in September. Your hormones are raging, and there are no young women around you at our facility. You work long hours during the week, and on Saturdays. Maybe you should rethink your schedule. I believe you should start going to movies and dances on the weekends with the local kids."

"I would have nothing in common with them."

"When you tell them that you are working here, they will flock to you. They will want to find out everything that is going on at our facilities. Don't bring the guys out here, only the girls. It will be a great way to impress them."

"I don't know how to dance."

"Neither did I until I met your mother, she's a great teacher."

"You want me to dance with my mom?"

"Do you want to learn how to dance?"

"I guess I'm going to learn how to dance by dancing with my mom."

"That wasn't so hard now was it? It's time for you to go home; you have stalled your departure long enough."

"I didn't think you noticed."

"I used to do the same tactic Gordon. Nothing you do hasn't been tried before, and been caught by an observant parent."

"Good night dad, I'll see you tomorrow."

"If you are very lucky, I may see you tonight at dinner."

"Dinner; what's that?"

"Gordon if you try that one more time, I'm going to have them tie you up and throw you in the back."

"It was just a test dad, I'm going."

"Delicious knows how to dance."

"If I let my sister get that close to me, she would kill me."

"Possibly, but if you're nice to her, she will teach you to dance first."

"That's not funny dad."

"Yes it was."

**************

78. A Holiday 'Weak'

The President was off to his home state of Montana to try to shoot something or someone again. The VP was at his home in West Virginia making preparations to receive William Zabo, his $50 million check, and his family. His estate manager told him everything was in readiness for his guests' arrival. Limousines would meet his jet at the Morgantown airport, and whisk them to the estate in 35 minutes with a police escort. They would come in by way of Bunker Hill Road which would be groomed that morning by the entire staff. There was a warning out on the Monongahela River that no large shipping traffic was allowed to use their horns within three miles of the estate, unless there was an emergency situation.

In this state, William Silver was treated like God. During his 18-year tenure in the Senate, and six years as vice president, he had more money funneled into West Virginia than anyone since Senator Robert Byrd. 

Even though the mining companies hated him, because of his stance on coal, they donated heavy amounts of money to his Senatorial campaigns because the miners love him. The safety acts he pushed through Congress in their behalf helped reduce accidents in the mines, and increased inspections from once a year to four times a year. The mining companies were being fined massive amounts of money, because of safety infractions.

In each of his three senatorial bids, William Silver won each election by double digits, and West Virginia was usually a blue state.

***************

What no one noticed during the week leading up to the meeting were men and women sneaking onto the property and setting up high-frequency speakers, like those used on ships to keep pirates away, and for crowd control. The speakers produced ear-splitting noise, when set properly, or they could be used to replicate the sounds of a symphony orchestra, or an atomic bomb. These were set up for a different purpose today, and if William Zabo was right, the Vice President's political career was over.

Four teams of men and women went out each night, from 1 AM to 5 AM, searching for cameras, tripwires, motion detectors, and laser detectors that might announce their presence. They found none. What they did find was plenty of friendly animals that would help their plan immensely. They found a few they didn't want to run into also: skunks, black bears, and porcupines to name a few.

The speakers were hidden deep in the scrub brush, and to hide any human scent, they sprayed animal urine and scat around the bushes to throw the security team dogs off their trail.

On July 3 the Colonel held his final briefing.

"I know this sounds like the weirdest set up we have ever pulled off, but we are getting paid handsomely to do it. Remember to point your transmitters directly at the speakers. Two magazines taped together: blue for blanks, red for live ammunition, and a bag to catch your casings.

When you start firing at the house, only use blanks. As you retreat, change to your red ammunition. If you are fired upon, use your live ammunition and take whomever it is down. At that point it is for real. Leave by your appointed escape route; change your clothes, dispose of them, and your weapon carefully. Pick up your new vehicle and identities, and go on your vacations. You know the drill; be calm and professional. We have practiced this many times, and if you don't break protocol, there is nothing anyone can do to you. Is that understood?"

"Sir, Yes Sir."

"Very well, have a good hearty meal, 'The Private' will be here this evening at 6 PM. He has paid us very well over the years, and we all can retire comfortably if we want to. This is my last mission. Each of you can be proud of your service. I know I am proud of each of you for the way you have handled yourself over these years. Regardless of what you do from this point on, honor these memories and keep the trust and faith of the men and women beside you. Never, under any circumstances, say their names; or where they live. We are family until the day we all die. There will be no reunions of our group, no phone numbers exchanged after today. The only method of contact is in case of emergency and that is the exchange in Louisiana. Don't expect an immediate reply, because I don't know how often I will call in or if anyone else will call in. Sergeant Zachary has been longing to know my age for years, so I am going to tell you all so he no longer has to guess. Just remember Paul, I still out run you in the mile, with 90 pounds of equipment on my back. I'm 64 years old. I was an enlisted man, until I got my degree. They made me a Lieutenant just before you joined up as a pup. How does that make you feel Sergeant?"

"Sir, with all due respect, and honor for your rank, I demand to see your long form birth certificate, and I want to look like you when I'm 64."

"You will if you follow three simple rules: Fight wars with men and women you trained personally. Don't ever drink or do drugs they cloud your senses and disrupt rational thinking. Don't ever get angry; get even in a big way." The last one I learned from 'The Private' himself. The man is a genius, and because of him we are all very wealthy."

"The ceremony is scheduled for 2 PM on July 4. There will only be 20 reporters and one television camera. It's going to sound like we have an army out there because of those speakers. As soon as they start posing for pictures, and Patrick is standing in front of the vice president, fire for effect. As soon as your chambers are empty leave. Don't look back; just get your asses out of there. Those of you at the fireworks truck, as soon as you hear us begin firing set off the fireworks. Take your extinguishers and wait until you hear the fire trucks coming, before you start trying to extinguish the fire. I know I'm repeating myself, but as Sergeant Zachary says, 'why break a habit of a lifetime."

"If tomorrow goes off the way 'The Private' planned, one of the most powerful men in the world, will become the laughing stock of the world. I may just make a slight detour from my plans if the vice president doesn't do what I believe he will do. If he does not commit suicide within the next few weeks, I may return and help him do it."

Sergeant Bernice Anderson said, "Colonel, sir wouldn't it be better if he died in the arms of the woman, while trying to bury his sorrows in her pussy?"

Corporal Allison Reed asked, "How about two women Colonel? He could be having a pussy party in a hotel downtown. It would make it very easy for you to accomplish your task."

"First I can't get rid of Sergeant Zachary, now I am finding it hard to get rid of the rest of you. Any other thoughts on this party?"

"There are two more pussy's here Colonel. We'd like to make ourselves available for this party."

"Okay ladies, 'One Pussy Party'. I must admit we have four great-looking pussies in this room. I think we will be representatives of the Gas or Oil Industry, here to speak with the Vice President about gas and oil leases of the coast of Georgia. Ladies when we are finished with our escape plans, go to Richmond or Washington and get a very expensive evening gown, a smart business outfit, and a very expensive long wig. I don't want any blondes, but I'd like a redhead, jet-black, sable, and brown. I want him to drop his pants on the dance floor.

Men, a tuxedo, plus a very expensive suit, shirt, with cufflinks, and shoes. Let your hair grow in a little. We have to look like successful business people to garner his attention.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 18



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

Note: Relax: You asked me to lengthen the story. This chapter will show you some of the places I am going, and some of the places I am going to keep hidden from you. Why would I tell you the ending before I get there? Isn't that what a good book does to keep you interested? I certainly hope I can make the ending of the story gratifying to all of you. P_D10 

***** 

81. Disclosures 

"Cassie let's go for a walk, we have to talk." 

"What's up Christian; why can't we talk here?" 

"Trust me; we can't discuss what's on my mind here." 

They went for a long walk into the fields, behind the main house. Cassie knew something was wrong with her brother, because her brother was unusually quiet. His head was down, his fists were clenched, and his face was taught. Finally, she grabbed his arm and turned him to her. 

"Okay big brother, what the heck is going on?" 

"I'm going home Cassie. I can't be around you any longer. As long as you were fixated on Callum, I was safe. That is no longer the case. I cannot keep my feelings for you under control any longer. I've been in love with you it seems from the day you were born. I know it's wrong, but there is nothing I can do about it. You are the most beautiful woman on the face of God's earth, and if you were not my sister I would have asked you to marry me years ago. I would treat you like a queen, because in my eyes that's what you deserve. You are wonderful to everyone around you, even if they are not the same way towards you. I have watched you pick up people when they are down and help them stay up and get nothing in return. You are as beautiful inside, as you are outside, and I can't stay near you any longer. I just wanted you to know why I was leaving." 

Cassie looked into her brother's eyes, and saw tears forming in their corners. She knew every word he said was true. He never took any girl out on a date, and he never had any close female friends. Actually, he didn't have any close friends at all. He was always hanging around her and her friends. It all made sense now, and she was shocked that she never noticed it before. 

"What am I supposed to say Christian, what am I supposed to do?" 

"Nothing, this is my problem, not yours. I probably will move to Nevada or New Mexico, and start up a business of my own. It will be easy enough with the amount of money I have, and I have the talent to do it. I won't tell mom or dad why, and neither should you. Do what Patti said; 'find the man of your dreams, and marry him'. Live a long and happy life, and remember that I loved you. I will be leaving tomorrow morning. I just wanted to say good-bye." 

Christian kissed her cheek, and began walking back towards the house. 

Cassie stayed where she was, stunned by her brother's revelations. She had to talk to someone about this turn of events; but who? 

If she spoke to Callum, he would knock Christian's head off. 

Patti might be more understanding, but she was too close a friend of her mother. She might feel obligated to say something to her. 

Sabrina was a possibility, but she worked for Patti and she might tell her. 

That left Laura and Anna, two women her age who might understand her quandary more readily. Now that Junie was in stasis, they were actually getting along with one another. She would try them, while they were monitoring Junie's progress tonight. 

After she finished her eight-hour shift with Callum; Laura and Anna took over for the 10 PM to 6 AM shift. She told Callum he could leave, because she wanted to have some girl talk time with Anna and Laura. 

Callum said, "Oh God, I don't need to hear this; I'm gone." He ran to the house, as if he was on fire." 

"What's up Cassie, it looks like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders." 

"I feel like I do, but you have to promise it stays between the three of us forever. Christian and I had a really strange talk this afternoon and I don't know what to do about it." 

Laura said, "If you're talking about Christian being in love with you, everyone knows it." 

"How, I just found out today. He told me this morning. How did you know?" 

"You were looking at Callum all the time. You never saw the way your brother looked at you. His eyes glow every time he looks at you. If you said something funny, he laughed the loudest. You could be wearing a potato sack, and he would have thought you were the most beautiful woman in the world. My mother said to you 'Find a man out there that deserves you.' Who did you think she was talking about?" 

"Your mother knows?" 

Laura replied, "I told you everyone knows, except you; because you weren't looking." 

"What am I supposed to do? I can't marry my brother, it's against the law. I don't know if I love him that way." 

"Why don't you go away together and find out? We will cover for you." 

"Where would be go?" 

"You can go to New York City and do the town, or go to Niagara Falls where all young lovers go. If you go to Niagara, you'll need your passports. Do you have it with you?" 

"We never leave home without them." 

"That sounds like a commercial I know." 

"He's leaving in the morning, how do I stop him?" 

"Climb into bed with him, fully clothed, and tell him what you've decided to do. Explain there will be nothing sexual, until you've made your decision. If he really loves you, he will jump at the chance." 

Cassie hugged her two friends. She said she would thank their mother herself in the morning. She ran, as fast as her feet would carry her, to her brother's room. 

His bedside light was on, a book lay on his chest, but he was unconscious. She jumped into the air, and landed on his bed beside him. 

He sat up; the book went flying, and wondered what the hell had happened. 

" 

Hi bro, remember me?" 

"What the hell are you doing in here Cassie?" 

"Making your dreams come true." 

"We can't do that Cassie, it's not right." 

"Screw what's right and wrong, I want to find out if it is good for the both of us. I have been blind. Everyone knew you were in love with me. The only person that didn't know was me. I was going to talk with Anna and Laura about our discussion this morning, and before I got a word out, they told me everyone knew. Everyone knew except me. Their whole family knew your secret and never said a word. I always wondered why you never had any friends, and always hung around with me; now I know why. This is what we have decided to do, and if you don't want to do it, you can go your way, and I will go mine. 

"We are going on a sexless vacation. I want to find out if I am in love with you the way you love me. I know I love you as a brother. I need to know if I could love you as a wife and partner. Are you willing to go on a vacation like this with me with no promises either way?" 

"Yes, affirmative, sure, certainly, absolutely, naturally, of course, indeed, okay, no problem, by all means, fair enough, positively, and did I say 'YES?" 

Cassie laughed, "Yes Christian, I think you covered the entire dictionary for the word 'YES.' We will speak to Patti in the morning, and tell her our plans. Callum will be furious with us, but I will put him in his place." 

"No baby, I will. He doesn't have a claim on you now, I do. He can shout from the highest rooftop if he wants to, but this is none of his business." 

"He will tell our parents." 

"If he's half the man he supposed to be, he will keep his mouth shut. If he's not, I will bankrupt him." 

"I won't let you do that. It would bring you down to his level if he does it. You are a better man than that." 

"Okay, we will see what the morning brings. It's time for you to go to bed. I'll see you in the morning." 

"I am in bed, and I'm staying here until morning. Could I have a good night kiss?" 

Christian kissed her on the cheek as he did in the morning. 

"Is that the best you can do Christian?" 

"I could go a lot further, but I don't know what your boundaries are." 

"I'll let you know if you cross any boundary lines." 

He kissed her deeply, as his hand roamed around her belly and move up towards her breasts. He wondered where she was going to stop him. 

She let him go a lot further than he ever expected. He felt the soft flesh of her breast underneath her blouse. He let his thumb roam across her nipple. When he felt it expand, he moved his mouth down to suckle on it. He heard her moan. 

"You're not wearing a bra." 

"I took it off just for you." 

"Baby girl, you are going to kill me." 

"I had to do something to make you stay. It was the easiest thing I could think of." 

"May I see them?" 

"No, that would be crossing the line. Go to sleep and dream of me. I will dream of you. We will see what the future brings." 

"You are going to make this hard for me." 

"You should be hard already." 

"I'm hard, you are horny, and you want us to go to sleep. This is going to be a long hard night." 

"Hopefully, it will be the first of many very long hard nights, if you're lucky." 

"Woman, you are going to kill me." 

"Possibly, but you'll know if I love you when it's over." 

"How long is this vacation going to be?" 

"We have to be back before Junie comes out of the 'Beauty Box'." 

"One year, please tell me you're lying." 

"It is not a year, it's only 351 days." 

"There's not enough cold water in the world to keep me under control." 

"There is where we're going." 

"Where is that Greenland?" 

"No, we're going to Niagara Falls." 

"Great, when I can't take it anymore I can go over the falls in a barrel." 

"As you're about to go over the falls look at me, I'll take my shirt off. I'll bet you wish you hadn't done it." 

"Cassie you are mean." 

"We are only going for a few weeks, maybe a month. I'll know one way or the other if we are right for one another." 

"What are we going to do then?" 

"The same thing we've been doing all our lives, tell each other the truth. If it's yes, we will tell our parents. They may not like it, but they can't stop us from doing it. It's been happening all through the ages. Every philosophy course I took in college tells you about it. From the earliest Chinese records up through England and France, interbreeding was common. The Roman Catholic popes had children with their own daughters. 

Will you stop that, you are hogging all the covers, Puffy. I'm getting tired I'd like to go to sleep." 

"Can we cuddle?" 

"If you don't I'll kick you out of bed." 

"Is that a bet?" 

"You will be very sorry if I wind up on the floor tonight Puffy." 

"Are you trying to tell me I have to lose weight?" 

"I'm not going to give you all the answers you gave me for this one word, but YES!" 

"Good night Bitch." 

"Good night Puffy." 

*********************** 

Test after test after test after test, I had never had so many tests done on my body in all the years of my life. If they put me through one more I swore I would go home without the results. If there was a machine in this hospital, I had been through it. If there was a blood test to be done, they did it. They did a bone marrow test, a spinal infusion, colonoscopy, endoscopy, and brain scan. They did things to me I didn't understand, if I had pancreatic cancer. 

Doctor Rubin assured me all these tests were necessary. 

The only reason I made it through these three days of testing was because Jennifer was at my side every moment of every day, and night. She slept in the same room as I did. She was stronger than I was, and she lent me some of her strength. 

Delicious became suspicious when I was not at work for two days in a row. She knew I would have to be dead to miss that many workdays in a row. 

She went to my secretary and asked Brenda where I was. 

"I'm sorry Mrs. Thyme I don't know. I was just told he would not be in to work for a few days." 

"Page Gordon, and have him come to my father's office please. Tell him his dad is back." 

"Mrs. Thyme, I would be lying to him." 

"Do you want to be working tomorrow Brenda?" 

"Yes ma'am, I'll page him." 

Gordon burst in to our father's office and asked, "How did your test go dad?" 

Delicious turned the chair around and asked him, "What tests?" 

"Oh shit, it's you. I'm not supposed to tell you." 

"Do you know what death by asphyxiation would feel like? I could explain it to you if you'd like." 

"Mom and dad will be pissed at me if I tell you. I'm in trouble either way." 

"Remember Gordon, they will only be angry with you. I will kill you if you don't tell me what's going on." 

"You better tell them that otherwise I am in deep shit. Mom and dad are at the University Hospital in Austin. Dad has pancreatic cancer." 

After the shock wore off she asked, "Are they sure it's pancreatic cancer?" 

"The doctor here was sure it was, but he sent him to a specialist in Austin to verify it, and recommend a course of action. He's been there for three days, and I haven't heard a word from them. I'm frightened Delicious, what am I going to do without him?" 

"Get ready to leave; we're going to Austin." 

She called Gray. "Hi honey, you are babysitting Newton. I'm going to Austin with Gordon. My father is in the hospital, I will let you know what's happening." 

"Do you know anything at all?" 

"Gordon said the initial finding was pancreatic cancer." 

"Oh shit, get going baby, I'll hold down the fort." 

"Thanks Gray, I will keep in touch." 

************* 

"Dan, you son of a bitch, you knew my father was in Austin, and you didn't tell me." 

"It was on a need to know basis, and you didn't need to know. We have him covered." 

"Well, I'm going to make your day more interesting. Gordon and I are going down there. We are leaving in 10 minutes, with or without escorts. Have a nice day Dan." 

Dan screamed, "You bitch!" 

He called the ready room, and started barking orders. Three of the four principal designers of the Beach Ball were going to be in a place that could not be effectively guarded by an army, unless it was shut down. He knew that was not possible. He was going to have to single down coverage on some of the scientists in the order to get more coverage at the hospital. He also had to increase coverage on Grayson Thyme. 

"I hate that woman." 

By the time Delicious and Gordon made their way to the parking area there were six black SUVs waiting to leave. The armored SUV was open for them to get into. 

Gordon asked Delicious, "What did you say to General Morgan to get us this much coverage?" 

"I told him I was going to drive to Austin. I think he looked at my test scores and didn't like the results." 

"You probably got 100 on your tests, and he thought you cheated." 

"Actually, I didn't cheat. I never took the test." 

"I won't even ask how you did that." 

"Good because I'm not going to tell you. I graduated high school the same day." 

"You cheated the system!" 

"You could say that, but it wasn't my doing. Some of dad's friends cheated for me." 

"Dad has a lot of powerful friends. Why don't you call one of them and find out where the best hospital for dad would be if he needs an operation." 

"I'd rather wait until we know the results before we send out an S.O.S." 

"Dad said the maximum life expectancy for this type of cancer is five years. We have to get off the ground a lot sooner than that. I mean a lot sooner. I want to push everyone into high gear. I don't want sloppy work, but I want to explain to everyone how important it is to get our father's dream into space before he passes away." 

"Listen to me kid, there are ways to do things, and their ways to do things properly. We don't want to fail when we are so close. The third wall is going up now. Once it is completed the bearings go in to keep to the main levels at a constant 1G so we don't go floating around the ship. Then the flooring gets completed, and the inside of the ship starts to get fitted out. That's a 12 to 18-month procedure. We are looking at a maximum of 18 months to two years before we can take off, and that's if nothing goes wrong. We may be able to close those 18 months down a few months by adding extra personnel, but we don't want people tripping over each other. Then there's the problem with Stasis; I don't know how that's going." 

"Yes you do." 

"How do you know you little runt, have you been spying on me?" 

"You shouldn't leave messages on your cell phone from Junie Penick. I just wanted to make sure she was alright. Imagine my surprise when she told you she was engaged to Callum Robbins, and she was going into Stasis the next day for one year." 

"Snoop, you're never to be trusted." 

"I know, but apparently you didn't. Do you want to know something else that's going on in your household that you don't know?" 

"Am I going to be horrified, or just surprised?" 

"If I were you I would go with horrified." 

"What's going on in my house? Did Newton find a way to assemble an atomic bomb?" 

"No nothing as horrific as that. He has broken into your coded secret files and correcting some of your mistakes. Instead of telling you, he's been emailing me." 

"My room is double locked. He can't open the simple locks on the kitchen cabinets; how is he getting into my room?" 

"There is nothing like making a parent relax her vigilance than by letting her watch you struggle with something simple. If you can't open it, it's not possible for him to bypass the sophisticated locks to her room, is it?" 

"The babysitter wondered why he took such long naps in the afternoon. I have to warn Gray what our child is doing." 

"Why, when dad found out what I could do he encouraged me to continue doing it, instead of stopping me. If Newt is finding flaws in your work can you imagine how smart he is? I was almost four when dad turned me loose on Sequoia. Can you imagine what Newt could do on Big Blue?" 

"I'm afraid to think about it." 

"Call Gray and have him bring Newton to work tomorrow, and see what happens." 

"How much do you think my husband can take in one day?" 

"Given him a chance, he will be fine. It's his son you're talking about. He will be very proud." 

************** 

I was lying down in bed recuperating from what they told me was the final round of testing, when the tornado, that is my daughter stormed into my room. As she looked at my exhausted, pale face, all the fury in her eyes dissipated. 

"DADDY!" 

She ran the few steps from the door to my bed and hugged me. I wanted to tell her everything was going to be all right but I didn't want to lie to her. 

"How did you find out I was here?" 

"You weren't at work two days in a row. You would have had to been dead for that to happen. I went to your secretary, and she said she didn't know where you were. I had her page Gordon, and to tell him your back. He came running into your office and asked how your tests came out. When I turned your chair around and he saw me he about died. I threatened him with his life and he told me you were here. Do you have the results yet?" 

"No, not yet, I should have them first thing tomorrow morning. I took the last tests today. I swear if they come up with one more test I'm leaving. There isn't one part of my body they haven't seen, probed, x-rayed, or scanned. I've had enough. I want to go home. I want to go back to work." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 18



Doctor Rubin walked in the room with reams of paper in his hands. 

"Doctor Luck, I have the results of all your exams. Is there anyone here you want to leave the room, while I tell you the results." 

"I think you should leave the room Gordon." 

"The only way you're getting me out of this room dad is by putting a gun to my head and pulling the trigger." 

"I guess that answers your question Doctor. Let me have it." 

Jennifer grasped my left hand and squeezed tight. Delicious had my right hand, and her other hand around Gordon's shoulder. 

"It is Pancreatic Cancer, Stage One. That is bad news and good news. It has been caught very early and it is operable. As good as I am at cancer operations I suggest you get someone better for this type of operation. It is extremely technically oriented, with a long healing time. As you heal, you will go through a course of radiation therapy and chemotherapy. You are looking at a period of one year from beginning to end. If it works, you will be cured; if it doesn't, longevity rate is approximately five years." 

"I can't be away from work for one year, I'm building a spaceship." 

Delicious said, "Dad, my work is done. I can take over your administrative duties, and help wherever else is necessary. You have to take care of your health; otherwise you will never see the Beach Ball take off." 

Jennifer asked, "Doctor what hospital has the highest success rate for this type of operation?" 

"That's easy, MD Anderson Hospital, in Houston Texas. It is the best in the world. If it's being used today, they invented it. They are absolutely the top of the line, and they are close by." 

Before I could say a word, Jennifer said, "Doctor could you set up an appointment for him. If I have to drag him there, he will be there. I'm not losing my husband." 

"Why is it the woman is always stronger than the man?" 

"The woman has more to lose." 

*********************** 

William Silver, the Vice President of the United States sent his resignation to the President via courier. He didn't want to be beaten up, and abused by the press corps by showing up in Washington. He just wanted to disappear." 

His cohort from 'Advanced Algorithms', Jim Pierce, had a 60 acre estate in the hills outside San Diego. He stayed there secretly. 

During the years he was in elected office, and Chairman of the Armed Services Committee, he funneled billions of dollars of military business to Advanced Algorithms. It became mutually advantageous for the excess cash flow from the dealings of their secret enterprise to be funneled out of the country, into offshore business accounts, and moved in odd amounts, to other companies under the guise of purchases and payments. It had worked flawlessly for 25 years, making them both exceedingly wealthy. 

Now the vice president had an enemy, an enemy who had cost him the presidency of the United States, William Zabo. He may not have done it himself, but it was his son who caused him to react the way he did. 

It should have been the biggest kick off of any presidential campaign ever; $50 million. William Zabo had given him excellent advice on the banking system, and the military industrial complex giving away closely guarded secrets. Exposing those who were doing it, and putting them in jail within six months of his inauguration would have made the people and the Congress stand up and take notice that he was not going to take any nonsense from anyone. This was going to be a reform presidency, with a strong military, and a strong economy, and he would crush anyone who got in his way. 

Now all his dreams were shattered because of a little boy and a firework explosion. The Secret Service determined that a truck carrying fireworks for a nighttime display caught fire, and set off the contents in its bed. The local sheriff's department and Highway Patrol filed similar reports after going over the truck and his property thoroughly. 

He was laughing stock of the entire world. The Russians, Chinese, North Koreans, and Iranians were showing pictures of him holding Patrick in front of him and telling the world that all Americans were like their Vice President, so afraid of fireworks; he had to protect himself by putting a child in front of him. 

Somehow he was going to get even. He could never get his name back, he could never get back into politics, but he could always get richer. Maybe he could kidnap the kid and hold him for $50 million in ransom. No the number might ring too many bells. $100 million in ransom sounds better. I'm going to kill the kid anyhow, what difference does it make. I'll let this furor die down for a while and then I'll make my move. I'll find out all about Mister Zabo and see how many of his plans I can ruin first." 

******************* 

82. Cultures 

Trailer loads of exquisite Sony equipment arrived at the N.E.S.T., along with their diminutive installers. They were small for two reasons: they had to fit between the first and second wall to install the cameras, and their hands had to be tiny to thread the wires through millimeter size conduits without stripping the wires bare and causing a short in the line that could possibly start a fire. 

On the inside of the ship, by the second wall, electrical technicians would check each camera as it was installed to be sure it was working properly. If it did it would be tied in to the grid, signed off on his paperwork, and entered into the computer at the end of the day by his supervisor. 

This turned out to be the easy part. The hard part was getting started. Although the people from Sony were told there could be no metal components on their cameras, each installation kit came with metal screws nuts and fasteners. 

Gray thanked God Even was in the hospital, because he would've had a stroke when he saw this. He sent the installers to their hotel and told them not to come back to the site until this problem was solved. Then he made a phone call to Dycke Schneider and sent him pictures of the assembly kits. 

Dycke was very calm about the entire thing. 

"Are they out of their fucking minds? They want to puncture holes in the exterior skin of a spacecraft. No wonder they never invented the wheel. I'll be out there, with a crew, in seven hours." 

Gray looked at his phone and again was thankful Even was in the hospital. He had never seen or heard Dycke raise his voice before. He was always calm and authoritative, never hyper or given to outbursts. He made these graphene and carbon fiber materials to specific tolerances and no one was going to put a hole into it, without Dycke shooting them first. 

7 ½ hours later Dick stormed into the N.E.S.T. 

Gray said jokingly, "You're late." 

"Traffic." 

"Traffic; on our highway?" 

"No it was raining in Charleston. We had to wait on the ground to take off. Payne was pissed." 

"She's here too?" 

"Do you think she would miss a chance to fly her pink airplane, and get away from Zoie?" 

"Why do I have a feeling Zoie is going to be one of your picks?" 

"Zoie is going to be our first and second pick." 

"You wouldn't know what to do without her." 

"You're wrong; we would find something to do without her." 

"You think you have problems, I just found out my five-year-old broke into my wife's coded computer. He broke through her firewall, worked through her password, and fixed some of her work. We thought he was going to be a normal child, and we were very happy about it. I brought him to work this morning and let him work on Big Blue for two hours. I didn't even have to tell him how to work on it, he already knew. I'm glad I have to take him with me, otherwise this world is in trouble." 

"I'll trade you one Zoie for one Newton." 

"I don't believe Delicious would go for that trade. As a matter of fact neither would I. Between the likes of Gordon, and Newton, we are facing 'A Brave New World', and it frightens me." 

"You really think it's going to get that bad? The youth of the world is going to take over?" 

"You were 17 when you began making your empire, Celeste was 16, Patti was 17, Harold Chase was 20, Even was 20. Two of you had a head start because of money and brains, the other three because of brains. That should tell you something about the youth of this world, and they are starting out younger every generation." 

"Next you going to tell me they're going to come out of the womb with a computer in the hands." 

"Not in their hands Dycke, it's already going to be in their heads." 

"Now you're frightening me Gray, where is Even?" 

"Even is in the hospital. He has Stage One Pancreatic Cancer. He is being transferred to MD Anderson Hospital. It is supposed to be the best in the world for this type of cancer. It is operable, but it is supposed to be a bitch of an operation. He could be away from here for as much as a year. Work will continue as fast as we can. Delicious will take over his administrative duties. I will try to find someone to help me take up the slack where Even was working. Noone in this world works, and thinks like Even Luck. I will do my best, and whoever I bring in will have to be of the highest quality. 

All the principles will be notified tomorrow morning; Even insisted on it. If anyone wants to withdraw from our group at this point it's fine. We can't refund their money because it's already been spent. He will not have to put in any more money, and he will not share in any more patents. 

So far we have 327 patents, and 17 more pending. All of our principles will be rich beyond their wildest imaginations. What you have now will be pocket change in a few years. 

Think of a fighter aircraft the size of a B-52, with no humans inside it, weighing less than a Boeing 757. It will be able to fly at Mach 6 or above, and carry no fuel. It would carry and armament package in the hundreds of thousands of pounds, with a range of infinity. They would constantly be on patrol, at altitudes unattainable by ground to air missiles. It's going to scare the shit out of every enemy of ours for eternity. 

What country would dare go up against that airplane? Two of them would rule the skies over the entire world, and 20 of our people own that patents, not only on the fibers to build the aircraft but the engines that make it fly, the control surfaces, and the ability to make it stop on a dime." 

"Gray can I see the problem were facing now please, you sold me on the airplanes." 

"I'm sorry Dycke; Gordon and I did the airplane in our spare time." 

"You two guys are dangerous together. Let's see what Sony came up with. Come on guys let's figure this problem out in a hurry." 

25 minutes later Dycke's engineers said, "We think we got it boss. We will have to take it to the factory and test it in the vacuum chamber but it should work just fine." 

"Are you going to tell me about it, or are you going to leave me in the dark as usual?" 

"We will tell you if you give us a raise." 

"If you don't tell me, you're fired." 

"Why do you always win that argument?" 

"Because I pay you too much already." 

"The cameras lens is three quarters of an inch wide so that's the hole we have to put the camera through. On the outside of the craft we will put a graphene/carbon fiber spacer, 3/4 inch x 1 inch by 1/16 inch first. We fit the camera lens through it and slide it into the spacecraft using the same chemical we use to form the fiber mat for the G/CF. They will adhere to the spacecraft, when we heat-treat it to 167 degrees. No one will ever notice it; they will just see the camera lens. On the inside of the craft we will fit another 3/4 inch x 1 inch x 1/16 inch spacer using the same procedure, and put a 1 inch x 1 1/2 inch x 1/16 inch mat over that for extra security with a tiny hole for the wires to come through. As we heat the fibers to 167 degrees they will enclose the area around the wires and you have an airtight seal. You can use our people on the outside, the Japanese in the middle, and the electricians outside wall two to make the installation go faster. It should take about a day to train them how to do this procedure properly." 

"Okay, I'll give you all five percent raise if it works, and you take a five percent decrease in salary if it doesn't." 

"Will you take a five percent decrease in salary if it works?" 

"Do you know how much I make?" 

"No." 

"In that case I will take a five percent decrease in salary if it works." 

"Boss, you are a pain in the ass." 

"How long have you worked to me now Joe?" 

"Since I got out of college, which is 23 years ago." 

"I must be a terrible boss to keep you around that long." 

"Yes sir, that's why I am vested in the company." 

Dycke pushed number one on his cell phone, and Payne answered. 

"What do you want twerp?" 

"I want to go home." 

"Zoie's at home, I want to spend the night here." 

"Where are you?" 

"I'm in a suite at the Hilton." 

"Did your rent rooms for the guys?" 

"The flight crew is all snuggled in bed. Six rooms are reserved for your techies. I am waiting for my husband." 

"Get naked woman, I'm on my way." 

"Men we are spending the night in Austin. We're staying at the Hilton; charge everything to your rooms. Have fun, check with the desk for our departure time. Otherwise we'll leave you here, and you can swim home." 

Gray said, "Even is more fun to work with than you are." 

"That's because Even is Crazy, and I'm not." 

"He is the most brilliant Crazy person you will ever know." 

"I couldn't agree with you more." 

******************* 

The test did not go well. Air leaked through like a sieve and the engineers were at a loss to explain it. 

Then an intern asked, "Is it coming through the camera?" 

At first the engineers thought he was crazy, but as they checked the airflow leaving the inside of the vessel and exiting into the vacuum chamber, it was the right answer. 

The 'O' ring, the lens was pressed up against to keep it stable could not withstand the force of zero gravity outside, and 1G inside. It failed. The fix was easy once they found the problem. They had to seal every opening on the back of the camera making it airtight. As soon as there was no air pressure pushing against the lens from the 1G side, the 'O' ring remained in its neutral position, and no air escaped. 

Keeping the cameras cool was not a problem. The lens would be exposed to the subzero temperatures of space, and would cool the other elements inside. Temperatures ranging from -200 degrees Celsius, while they were still close to Earth, and descending to the lowest possible temperature in the universe, 2.7 degrees Kelvin, as they entered the deepest portion of the Interstellar Medium. 

The Graphene/Carbon Fiber plant went into rush production for the needed parts. Two weeks later, the parts were in Temple Texas ready for installation. 

It was hard to impress upon the Japanese installers that speed was not as important as perfection. One mistake and everyone died. The instructors kept telling them this over and over again, while they trained them about the heating of the materials to 167 degrees. 

"Don't heat the materials to 164 degrees and not to 170 degrees. Heat them to 167 degrees exactly. That is what the optical lenses are for. Believe what they are telling you, and use them every time you heat the materials. We don't want to send back a message to Earth saying, "Sony's equipment caused a fire, and the ship is about to explode because of it. It would bring shame upon you and upon your company." 

The Japanese understand the word shame. It is an anathema to them. They would walk 100 miles out of their way to avoid it. 

The work on the cameras began on July 27. Using Sony's estimate it should be done by September 30 of next year; Gordon's 16th birthday. 

Gray thought, "What a birthday present that would be." 

Then he thought, "God, I feel rudderless without Even. I've got to get to work before I start pitying myself." 

******************** 

"You two go back to work. We can't afford to have the three of us away from the project at one time. Gray will go out of his mind without someone to guide him. Gordon you have to start uploading the star charts onto the Exascale computers. There's a lot of work to be done, and your one person short for a long time." 

"No dad, we may have a replacement already." 

"Who did you get?" 

"We're keeping it in the family; it's Newton." 

"Newton, Delicious what's going on?" 

"I just found out today dad. My son has been pulling the wool over my eyes. Apparently, when I leave him with the babysitter he pretends to take a nap. While she watches television, he breaks into my room. He has been able to bypass my firewall, my password, and my coding. Gordon told me he even fixed some errors he found in my computations. He fixed errors in MY COMPUTATIONS. If I wasn't here, I would be beating the crap out of that little shit, because I don't make errors." 

Jen kissed me. "There is the wonderful little mother we all know and love, isn't it dear." 

"Shut up mom. Gray took that little prick to work today and sat him down at a Big Blue terminal. He was going to show Newton how to work it, but Newt pushed his hands away and started working on it by himself. I'm sorry to tell you this but my husband thinks we have another Gordon on our hands. Newt sat at the terminal for almost 2 hours. He started changing the energy calculations for my Ion/H2 engines. I'm going to kill that kid." 

I laughed at my daughter, and it felt wonderful. I hadn't laughed in days, and it brought a sense of normalcy back into my life. 

"Are you beginning to see how I felt when I met you, my darling daughter?" 

"Don't you start on me, dad. I'll do the operation on you for free." 

"That's very kind of you, because I don't have insurance." 

"You make sure each of us has insurance, and you don't carry insurance?" 

"I was healthy until I met you. Then I had to run away, because someone broke into my computer. I met another woman, who I married and has given me two lovely children plus one she brought with her. I took a trip up to the northernmost reaches of the United States to get rid of you, only to find out instead of being my niece, you are my daughter. It ruined my entire day. I couldn't leave you stranded without parental guidance, so I decided to come home and straighten you out. On the way back, I got into a small airplane. It flies into a storm, the engines die, and we pull a maneuver that the second woman in my life told me about while flying to Fairbanks. I told the pilot, "Why don't we hit those trees with the tale of the aircraft instead of the nose?" 

He said, "Boy that sounds like fun." 

So like the woman on the plane said, we smacked the tail of the aircraft into some tall trees, and the nose of the airplane slides down to the ground. Guess what, I am still healthy. I build a cart, pull the pilot 40 miles up to a big house, and meet this beautiful woman again. They take me and the pilot to the hospital and I am still healthy. I didn't get sick until I got back to you little girl. What do you have to say for yourself?" 

"Mom can I beat the shit out of him?" 

"No, that story was so full of shit I think he's empty. Take your brother home; hand him over to Montgomarie and tell her to put him back on his schedule for training and work. Then you are going to have to figure out what to do between Newt, and your administrative duties. 

If Newt is as good as Gray thinks he is we are going to need another administrator in house. Even do you know anyone who would take the job over for you on a temporary basis?" 

"I know who would do it best, but I don't know if he is available." 

"Give me his name and I'll call him." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 18



"William Zabo; he is absolutely brilliant." 

"Is he listed on your cell?" 

"Yes he is. You two get going, take security with you. We will call you when we get to Anderson." 

Delicious and Gordon kissed me goodbye and walked out of the room. They had work to do, and the ship could not be finished without them. The room was an oasis with them, and a desert as soon as they left. Even with Jennifer constantly at my side, I felt lonely. 

I said a silent prayer. "Please God let me live long enough to see it fly." 

************* 

"Zabo residence, this is Jemma." 

"Hello Jemma, this is Jennifer Luck, I am Doctor Even Luck's wife." 

"Hello Jennifer, how is everything?" 

"If your husband is at home I would like to speak to him on a rather urgent matter. If not I'd like to leave him a message." 

"William is not at home now, but I'll be happy to pass along your message?" 

"Would you please tell him that Even has cancer? He would like to know if William could become the chief administrator, at our headquarters in Temple Texas, until we can get a permanent replacement for him. Your husband was the only person Even could think of who could take over for him." 

"I am sorry to hear about your husband's illness. I will call William and get this message to him immediately." 

"Thank you very much Jemma, we both appreciate your help." 

*************** 

William was on the phone with me five minutes later. 

"When did all this happen Even? You never mentioned you weren't feeling well." 

"Hello to you too William. I thought it was appendicitis, because I had a slight swelling in my abdomen. I went to the doctor to have it checked out. I believe he knew immediately what it was. He ran a battery of tests which confirmed his suspicions. He sent me to Austin, where they put me through the ringer, to come up with a firm diagnosis and a plan of action. 

They are sending me to MD Anderson Hospital in Houston, tomorrow morning. It is supposed to be the finest hospital in the world for Pancreatic Cancer Care. That's why I asked Jennifer to call for your help. I could be out of action for as much as a year. 

We won't need you for that long, but until Rod can do a search to find someone to take over my administrative duties, I wanted to ask if you could fill in for me until that's taken care of. You have the finest mind of any man I have ever met. I know you could do the job easily. My only question is; do you have the time to do it." 

"Jemma didn't tell me it was Pancreatic Cancer. How bad is it?" 

"It's early stage one and the doctors are very optimistic it can be cured." 

"That is great news. Okay, I'll move my family down there for a year and take over your administrative duties. It means I can harass Stephano and find out where my money is going." 

"You are going to laugh when you see Stephano's desk. Even with all his help, he is elbow deep in paperwork. I have no idea how he knows what's going on, but he's doing a phenomenal job. 

Every time the auditors come to check our financial statements, they are perfect. He keeps track of every penny that comes in and goes out." 

"Patrick is going to have quite a few playmates. We have several five-year-olds a couple of six-year-old's, and a four-year-old for him to play with. 

Of course they are all watched over by agents with automatic weapons, but that's normal for our children." 

"You were always the master of the understatement Even. Get yourself up to that hospital, and get your health taken care of. Have your lawyer friend find us a home. We will be down within two weeks." 

"William, you have always been a great friend. Now you are a godsend. I can't thank you enough for taking over for me. I know the administrative side of building my spacecraft is in great hands. Thank you so much." 

"Even, you get well, and don't think about anything else. I'll keep the ship on course until you get back." 

*************** 

83. Cracked Up 

Babcock & Wilcox - Charleston, North Carolina. Nuclear Power Generation Division Headquarters 

"You call her." 

"Do you think I'm out of my fucking mind Fred? You call her. You are the division manager; it's your responsibility to tell her what happened." 

"She's going to kill someone, and I prefer it be you. My wife is expecting our third child, and I'd really like to be around to see it grow up." 

"That's not a fair argument. Just because Susie and I decided to keep the population of the planet down to a manageable size does not mean I should let that bitch kill me, because you got Angela pregnant." 

"How are we supposed to explain to that bitch we cracked something that cannot be cracked? That containment vessel could be dropped from ten times that height onto a concrete floor and it would bounce before it cracked. How the hell did we crack it? We are supposed to deliver that reactor in 12 months. Would you like to explain to me how we are going to meet that deadline without a containment vessel?" 

"There had to be something wrong with the mixture of the silicon carbide and the beryllium oxide. We must've screwed up the mixture. We have to find out what we did. If we did it right, we have backtrack everything from the day the men put it into the mixers, to the where the bags were stored, to the suppliers and where they got their supplies from. 

In the meantime, we have to start all over again from the beginning. I'll take a piece of the vessel with me to Texas, after I rewrite my will." 

"I knew you were standup guy Wes. I'll write up your eulogy, and you can give it your stamp of approval, before you leave." 

"Just make sure my health and life insurance are paid up to date, through the company. I'll call Mrs. Thyme, and tell her I'm coming to see her." 

"It's been great working with you Wes." 

"You're a prick for making me do this Fred." 

"Yes, but if you live, it's a step towards upper management." 

"You've dealt with her. If I live I'm going to come back with no legs. When I told her she could save $5 million by using the round plutonium rods instead of the octagonal shape rods, she almost emasculated me with her fingernails. 

When I asked her why plutonium, instead of uranium, I thought she was going to take my ass hole out through my throat. That bitch, excuse me, that customer is going to make a last-minute change on that vessel. She's going to change it from nuclear fission to nuclear fusion. I'd bet my last penny on it." 

"We would've heard about it already. It would have been all over the news. Nuclear fusion for domestic use would solve all the world's power problems. You think that little girl is going to do it on that spaceship. I don't think you going to have to worry about your last penny." 

"$1000 says you're wrong." 

"$1000 and I'll take you out to dinner if you're right." 

"As long as it's a place with table cloths and real silverware, and not the usual Jack-in-the-Box, I accept." 

"I don't always take you to Jack-in-the-Box. I take you to Arby's sometime." 

"Yes you do; on those really special days when we have to work instead of being home with our families. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's Day, because we are running behind on an important project. Sometimes you even splurge for a soda." 

"That's why they pay me more than they pay you." 

"Fred, if you weren't my friend you'd be on the floor now." 

"I'll have Sandi get your airline tickets to Houston, coach naturally. I'll even splurge for a car with an air conditioner." 

"Tires and an engine would be good also." 

"Wes, you're pushing me too far." 

*************** 

"Hello Doctor and Mrs. Luck, my name is Doctor Elizabeth Nu. I am your oncologist. Mrs. Luck if you have a pen and paper, I would suggest you start writing. Doctor Luck, I am your team leader. There are six doctors on our team. There will be no name tests for quite a while, because we have more important things to discuss and to think about. 

We are a patient oriented hospital. My team and I will devote every effort to cure you. However, I am going to give you the worst-case scenario first. 

You can live without both arms and both legs. You can live without a stomach, because we can fake one. You can live without a spleen, gallbladder, appendix, part of your upper and lower intestine, and part of your bladder. You can live without most of your liver. You can live with one kidney, and if you are one of the lucky ones, you can get a new heart. 

However, the pancreas is a totally different organ. When it gets sick it affects everything from the stomach down. Even though we know a lot about it, we don't know everything. We don't know why it does what it does to the human body. However, at this hospital we have made giant leaps in the care and treatment of Pancreatic Cancer. 

We have seen the results of all your tests. We have discussed them in a forum and come up with a plan of action for you. It is not going to be easy on your body. You are going to get sick and then sicker, from the beginning of our treatment continuing for approximately six weeks. Then you will get better for a time why your body heals. 

We know exactly where the tumor is and we are going to attack it with radiation and chemotherapy in an attempt to shrink it to a more manageable size. Your tumor is small, and the smaller we can get it, the better the chance your operation will be successful. 

If the tumor refuses to shrink, or stays in the area it's in, the operation is going to be very extensive. You are going to have a long healing time in the hospital, and then in a recovery facility. 

"Doctor Nu, I am a scientist. I am building a spacecraft. I know how difficult things can be. I don't like being left in the dark. Telling me the operation is going to be very extensive and difficult doesn't tell me anything. I can tell you the exact amount of millimeters and the tensile strength of each area of my craft. I need to know exactly what is going to happen to me so I can prepare my mind, and my body for what's coming. I want to get back to what's important to me, my family, and my work." 

"Doctor Luck, when the staff heard you were coming to us the reaction was like we were getting a rock star. Everyone knows what you're doing, and most are rooting for you. The rest think you're crazy." 

"What side of the fence do you fall on Doctor?" 

"I fall on the scientific side. I don't believe gravity can be reversed." 

"Doctor Nu, we need a doctor/surgeon to go with us to the stars. People get sick on this planet and they will get sick and hurt on another planet. If I can prove to you that gravity can be reversed, would you care to come along? You don't have to do it, but I will still prove to you it can and has been done. A 16-year-old girl, my daughter, Delicious, did it using a pencil, paper, and a high school computer. In two years or so, those engines will push us away from this planet, pull us towards the moon, Mars, and Jupiter, and with the help of the two other engines she designed; we will move beyond the speed of light, and leave our solar system. I know it sounds like science fiction, but we will be beaming back pictures as we break many of the rules science lives by today." 

"Your argument sounds very convincing Doctor; and I will take it under advisement. Now to answer your question about your upcoming operation; if the radiation and chemotherapy do not work; here is how your operation will go." 

"Mrs. Luck you may want to sit down for this." 

"Thanks for the warning Doctor, it sounds like this is going to be terrifying." 

"The operation is called, 'A Pancreaticduodectomy.' It involves removing part of the stomach, the duodenum, the effected portion of the pancreas, the bile ducts, the lymph nodes, and the gallbladder. You will be eating through a tube in your small intestine for three weeks after the operation. This will allow your stomach and intestine below your duodenum to heal properly. After that you will be on a strict diet for six months to help you gain weight, but not by eating greasy, or heavy foods. I hope you like cottage cheese Doctor, because you're going to be eating a lot of it. Once your insides have healed, you will be back here for testing. Depending on what we see, we will start radiation and chemotherapy again, just chemotherapy, or nothing at all. You may think 'nothing at all' is good. Sometimes it's the worst thing we can tell you. It would mean that the cancer has done one of two things. It is gone, or spread to a point where we can't help you any longer. At that point, it's best for everyone concerned to help you manage the pain you will be in. 

We have found in those cases that putting a patient through chemotherapy and radiation just makes the patients sicker than they already are. They gain no benefit from the treatment, and they lose too much weight. It's not fair to the patient, and it gives the patient's family false hope. Does that tell you everything you wanted to know Doctor?" 

"Yes Doctor Nu it does. When can I start fighting this cancer? The faster the fight starts, the quicker it will be over, and I can go back to work." 

"Is he always this inpatient Mrs. Luck?" 

"No Doctor, he's not usually this calm. Can I stay in the same room with him?" 

"We will have housekeeping set up a bed for you." 

"Thank you Doctor." 

Jen took my hand and kissed me. She looked me in the eye and said, "So help me God, Even Luck, if you die on me I'll come after you and kill you." 

"I love you too Jennifer." She crawled into bed with me, lay by my side, and began to cry. 

"I wish I had ice cubes." 

"I'll get you some." 

"What good would that do? I won't be able to slide them down your blouse." 

"Even, you are incorrigible." 

"If you think I'm incorrigible now, wait until after they give me my medication tonight." 

"We can't do that here Even; this is a hospital." 

"How much would you like to bet we will do it in a hospital, and maybe more than once?" 

"Even if we get caught I'll be mortified." 

"Then let's not get caught." 

"I think you're trying to catch up for all those years you weren't having sex." 

"Are you complaining Mrs. Luck?" 

"Absolutely not Doctor Luck, every time I see that thing of yours it's pointing at me." 

"It knows where home is." 

"And home knows where it is sir. I believe it's time for you to take a nap. You have had a long drive, and a restless night. Regardless of your bravado, you are as frightened as I am. Go to sleep my love, I will be right here when you wake up." 

"You are the only reason I have made it this far Jen. You are my strength, and my reason for living. I love you. You've made me happier than I thought I would ever be." 

"I make you happier than your spacecraft?" 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZ nnnn ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ nnnnnn 

"Don't give me that bullshit Mister! I know you're still awake. At least I'm a close second." 

"No Jen, you are first in my heart, and in my head. My spaceship does not keep me warm at night. It did not give me three wonderful children. I could do without my spaceship, but I could not be happy without you." 

"You are such a terrible liar Even. Go to sleep, I Love You." 

*************** 

"Thank you for seeing me so quickly Mrs. Thyme. I'm sorry I had to bother you at home, on a Saturday, but what we have to talk about is something of great importance." 

"Don't play with those locks, Newt. We both know you can open them. Sit down with us, and you can listen to what Mister Purcell has to say." 

"Thank you mommy." 

"So Mister Purcell, how can I help you?" 

Wes Purcell opened his large satchel and pulled out what look like a broken piece of concrete. 

"What is that Mister Purcell?" 

"That Mrs. Thyme is part of your containment vessel. We are at a complete loss to figure out how a ceramic compound that should be able to fall from a height of 200 feet onto a concrete floor, and bounce, cracked when it fell off its hinges. Before we start over again, checking everything, from the from how our men calculated the amount of mixture to put into the cauldron, back through the entire supply chain, we need to know what happened to this, and exactly how long we have to deliver the finished product." 

Delicious screamed, "Why would I give you idiots a second chance at making the same mistake. I should take this piece and break your open your head. If my son wasn't here, I would have taken your head off your shoulders and be drinking your blood. What did you assholes at Babcock do?" 

"Newton put that down." 

"That's the point Mrs. Thyme. Everything was put together according to the recipe. It should be perfect. It came out of the Kiln exactly as it was supposed to. The measurements were right on the money. There wasn't a flaw anywhere. The x-rays were wonderful. There were no pores or air gaps in the entire vessel. We had enough stock on hand to build a second unit if we had to, but we didn't need it. It was perfect. We are going to do it again, but not with the stock we have on hand. We are going to a different supplier, and making sure he gets his supplies from a different source. There has to be a reason for this failure, we just don't know why." 

Newton said, "I do." 

"Newton, go to your room and play. Now is not the time to be funny." 

"Mommy, I know why the rock is dusty." 

"Okay baby, tell mommy why the rock is dusty." 

"There was too much mercury in the water. It did not allow the two ceramic agents to bond to one another." 

Wes looked at Newton. "What planet is that kid from?" 

"This is my son Newton Luck Thyme. Could he possibly be right?" 

"You're damn right he could be right. Mercury is an element that dissolves in water. We eat it every time we eat contaminated fish. It's in our water supply. We purify the water before we use it, but we don't sterilize it and take out the heavy elements. We've never had to do that before. Newton you're a genius." 

"I know." 

Delicious closed to her eyes. "Oh Newton not you too. I had enough of that sentence from Gordon." 

"Mrs. Thyme, I'd like to go back to my original question. How much time do we have to make another containment vessel? Then I have a follow-up question." 

"I'm going to tell you straight out Mister Purcell. My dad has Pancreatic Cancer. The quicker we can get the Beach Ball off the ground the better. 14 months would be fantastic. 16 months would be okay. 17 months and you lose your balls. 18 months and you lose your life. Do we understand each other?" 

"Yes, I understand perfectly. Now for my follow-up question, and this will not leave this room. Are you going to change this reactor from a fission chamber to a fusion chamber? If you are I can save time by making the adjustments inside the chamber while we are building it, instead of you having to spend valuable time retrofitting it, when you get it." 

"How did you know?" 

"I watched your brother on television. He is an amazing young man." 

"Gordon is the one who made this possible." 

"Mommy that's easy." 

"Whose kid is this again? Are there any more like him around?" 

"He's my child. As of this moment I am not planning on duplicating him. I'm beginning to think I may not have any more children, because he's scaring me." 

"That child would scare Beijing. I'm going back to Charleston to run some tests. If Newton is correct, we will start on a new containment vessel Monday morning. If he's not, I'll call you tomorrow afternoon, and we will have to come up with a different plan." 

"Newton, are you correct about the Mercury?" 

"Mommy, it can only be one of two things: Mercury or Bromine. I'll bet you my ice cream it's Mercury." 

"It's Mercury Mister Purcell; he doesn't give up his ice cream to anyone." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 18



"I will call you tomorrow afternoon." 

"Goodbye Mister Purcell; you work on Sundays?" 

"Only God takes a day off, not us humans." 

*************** 

"Come on monster; mommy is taking you to work. She wants to talk to daddy about you." 

"Can I play with the Blue machine again?" 

Delicious grinned at him. "Why not, you might teach it something." 

"I wish it worked faster, like the ones Gordon is playing with." 

"How do you know about the computer Gordon is working on?" 

"He puts his cell phone on and lets me watch him work as he puts the star chart programs into the computers." 

"Is he doing it correctly?" 

"Oh yes, Gordon is very smart; he's smarter than you are." 

"Do you want to get a spanking?" 

"No, why would you spank me? What did I do wrong?" 

"You said Gordon was smarter than I am. It may be true, but you didn't have to tell that to me." 

"I thought everyone knew." 

"I invented and designed the three engines that are taking us into the New World of Space. Why would everyone think Gordon is smarter than I am?" 

"What you did was in the past. What Gordon is doing is for now. What I am going to do is for the future. It's all part of the plan mom." 

"What plan Newt? Who made up this plan?" 

"Grandma was told me there was a plan. She loves you a lot." 

"How do you know grandma loves me?" 

"We talk all the time. She watches over me to make sure I don't get in trouble. She taught me how to open the locks to your room, and how to use your computer." 

"Mom, if you can hear me, stop telling my son my secrets." 

"She can't hear you mom; she's in a meeting." 

"Who is she in a meeting with? 

"Peter, Paul, and Mary." 

"It's nice to know that singing group is still together." 

"They sing too, mommy?" 

"Oh God!" 

"No mommy, she isn't at this meeting. It's Saturday, She's resting" 

"Newton please stop talking, you're scaring me." 

"Okay mommy, but nothing bad will ever happen to us." 

"Does the word us include your father?" 

"Oh yes, I am going to have four brothers and two sisters. How else could you have more children?" 

"Newt don't you dare tell that to your father. He will walk around with a permanent smile on his face." 

"It's okay mommy, he will be smiling very soon." 

"Why will daddy be smiling very soon?" 

"Teddy is already growing in your belly." 

"I can't be pregnant Newt, I've been taking... Oh no, did I forget to take my birth control pills with everything that's been happening here. Someone please shoot me, now is not the time for me to have a baby." 

"Can we go to work now? I want to play with the computer." 

"Okay, but if you hear a bomb go off, it will be your father when I tell him I'm pregnant." 

"4 ½ months pregnant mommy, you have to start taking your folic acid and prenatal vitamin and mineral pills." 

"Is there anything you don't know Newt?" 

"I'm learning the same way you learned mom. Grandma is teaching me." 

"Will you thank her for me?" 

"I don't have to, she watches over you every day too." 

"Dad told me that once, and I forgot about it. Thank you mom, thank you for everything you've done for me." 

Grandma says, "I love you too. I owe you a sweet life." 

Delicious began to weep, as she picked up Newt, and kissed him. 

"Ice cream first, then we will go to work." 

"Two scoops?" 

"One scoop, you monster." 

"At least I tried." 

"When you are 13 you can have two scoops." 

"Why do I have to be 13 to have two scoops?" 

"Probably because I said so." 

"The United States is not supposed to be run by tyrants." 

"I am not a tyrant, I am your mother. There is a big difference." 

"I don't think so, they both act the same." 

****************** 

84. Retribution 

"Switchboard." 

"This is Marcus with a message for the Brass. Soldier of Fortune Magazine, issue 2634, page 76; center left. Urgent: Believe it concerns 'The Private!' I will check in every two weeks." 

"Message received." 

"You're getting old Paul. It's only 500 meters, and you only hit the edge of the 10 ring." 

"Did you see that gust of wind that blew up at the last second Colonel? I'm happy it hit it at all." 

"I can see all my years of training are going down the drain already. If you can't judge the wind from this distance, you are in big trouble. You also are going to owe me $1000." 

"You think you are going to do better than me on this shot Sir?" 

"Absolutely Paul, would you like to add a zero to that bet?" 

"Sir, I may be getting old, but I'm not getting stupid. Take your shot." 

Colonel Lucius Canyon waited for the wind gust. As soon as it reached its maximum fury, he depressed the rifle's trigger gently. He aimed three feet right of the target and 16 inches high. Never taking his eyes off the scope he watched the projectile curve gently and hit the target a few millimeters high, in the center of the ten ring. 

Paul looked through the spotting scope, and sighed. "Colonel, sometimes I think you could do that with your eyes closed." 

"Practice Paul, year after year, day after day of practice. It's like that Canadian kid who took the sniper out in Iraq from almost a mile away. Severe crosswind from left to right, and three floors below him. It was an unbelievable shot. The sniper killed 16 people from his perch, including a green lieutenant, who refused to keep his head down. That kid fired the shot a total of five floors above the sniper, and 15 yards to his left. He admitted he only wanted to scare the sniper off that balcony, but he put that bullet in his right ear, and blew his brains out instead. 

He got a medal from the Canadians, the Brits, and us for that shot. Practice Paul, practice, practice, practice, and then there's a little bit of luck involved." 

"Are you ready to lose another thousand dollars?" 

"Absolutely, it's only money." 

"Why don't we moved back to 700 meters, and I'll make a man out of you." 

"Can you see that far Colonel?" 

"I'll muddle through Sergeant." 

The Colonel's cell phone rang for the first time in seven months. There were only two reasons for it to ring. There was an urgent message; or it was William and he had a problem. He never expected it to be both. 

"This is Backwoods." 

"Switchboard with urgent message." 

"Authenticate." 

"Utah, Omaha, Gold, Juno, Sword, Overlord." 

"Proceed." 

"Marcus: Soldier of Fortune Magazine- issue 2634 - page 76- center left. Believe it concerns 'The Private'. I will check in every two weeks." Message ends. Switchboard out." 

"I'm so glad I made you get your helicopter pilots license. We are going to the mainland." 

"What's up Colonel?" 

"Marcus thinks there's a hit out on 'The Private.' There is only one person with balls big enough to try it." 

"The Vice President; I knew we shouldn't have let that bastards live." 

"William wanted him humiliated all over the world, and he got what he wanted. Now let's see what that prick has in store for William. I won't warn him, until we have more facts. Marcus could be wrong, although I doubt it." 

Four hours later, they were in downtown Vancouver searching for a store that carried Soldier of Fortune Magazine. The issue was two months old, but it only came out quarterly. It was deliberately obscure, but there were enough references to a wealthy man, and separating his son from a doting father to make the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. 

"Sir, it would be great if we could get one of our young ones to join up with them. We could implant a beacon into his ass and follow him wherever he goes. We would know where the target is, and know if he had been compromised." 

"It's a good idea Paul, if we could get everyone to check in. Not everyone is going to check in. They may all have lives now. They are all wealthy, and may have settled down. It's what we did until today. It's time for me to call William and give him a warning." 

************ 

"Lucius my old friend, what do I owe the honor of this phone call?" 

"William, if you're in New York get out now. There is a hit out on you and your family. They are going to try to kidnap Patrick and extort money from you. I'm going to try to get my group together and find out who these bastards are. I believe I know who the tip of the spear is already." 

"Please don't tell me it's the Vice President." 

"I keep telling you that you are the smartest person I have ever met, and it's true." 

"Well the good news is I'm not in New York, I'm in Temple Texas, watching over the building of a spacecraft." 

"Please don't tell me you're involved in that venture?" 

"I am, but only $80 billion worth." 

"I love how you say that as if you take it out of your pocket and it means nothing." 

"Lucius, I have already received 400 patents from this project, and five percent of each patent is mine. Each patent will bring in a minimum of $5 billion a year, most of them will bring in much more. By the time this spacecraft leaves the earth, I will have recouped all my money plus some. How bad a deal do you think I've made now?" 

"William, I kneel before you, and bow my head in shame. I'm sorry I doubted you." 

"You should never kneel before me my friend. You called to save my life and the lives of my family. They are worth more to me than all the money I have. We have excellent protection here for everyone. Each family member is guarded by two men or women. They are not rent a cop's, they are fully trained agents led by General Dan Morgan." 

"Danny is there? Can we do a conference call?" 

"Absolutely, don't hang up." 

"Lucius you old reprobate, nobody has killed you yet?" 

"Danny if you couldn't do it, nobody else could." 

"God knows I tried. At least I got you kicked out of the service." 

"I got closer to Milosevic, than anyone else did. Another week and I would have brought you his head." 

"I would have loved his head, but not the way you went about getting information about that murderer." 

"It was not a clean war Danny and you know it. You saw the pictures of the people in the open graves. Babies without heads, mass murders committed daily. The bastard was a war criminal and you knew it. I was the answer to that problem and you cut me off." 

"These are old arguments Lucius, neither one of us is going to change our minds. What do you have for me today?" 

"I was out of the business until I got a call today. A member of my former team found in article in Soldier of Fortune Magazine. Someone, I believe it's the vice president, is gathering a team to kidnap William's son, Patrick. He is going to try to extort a large sum of money from him. You know as well as I do, once they get it the boy is dead. They have to be stopped before they try." 

"How do you know it's the vice president?" 

"It's retribution for what happened on July 4 at his home in West Virginia. He's blaming William for how he reacted that day. I know it doesn't make any sense, because William was there to give him money. He fucked up, not William; but in his warped mind he wants to get revenge." 

"Why do I have a feeling there's more to this story than meets the eye?" 

"You're a suspicious person Danny, you always were." 

"You are a lying sack of shit Lucius, you always were." 

"Are you two finished yelling at each other now? I would like to know how both of you are going to protect my family and me. I want Lucius involved He is my friend, and I trust his counsel." 

"How long have you two known each other?" 

"I believe it's over 20 years, isn't it Lucius?" 

"23 years to be exact William." 

"That's a few years after I kick you out of the service." 

"General, you are crossing the line. I don't want to hear that tone of voice about my friend one more time. I don't want to hear that line of questioning one more time. If I do you're fired, and he will replace you. I told you I trust Lucius with my life. He has saved it more than once. He has been the leader of my protection people for almost 15 years. He has been a friend and confident for 23 years. Don't get me angry again General Morgan; I am not use to being insulted by a member of my staff. Do you get my message General?" 

"Yes Mister Zabo, loud and clear. Who is running the protection detail here; Lucius or me?" 

"You are General, just as you were yesterday and the day before, nothing has changed. Lucius is my advisor he will not interfere with your operation, is that clear. If you tell me to do something, I will do it without delay." 

"Thank you Mister Zabo, I now understand what my parameters are." 

"What do you intend to do about my wife and son?" 

"I intend to find a safe house far away from here for them to live in, until we can ascertain what these people are going to try to do." 

"Danny, I'm going to try to have one of my young people infiltrate their organization. We're going to implant a beacon into his ass so we can locate him. If it works, we will be one-step up on them. It's iffy right now, because we don't know if anyone is going to check in or when." 

"Okay Lucius, keep me advised." 

"Dan, my daughter has a place in Glen Falls, New York; would that be secure enough?" 

"Before you answer that Danny, I lost 10 men there to an assault by 30 people using rocket propelled grenades and heavy weapons. The barn is made out of concrete; the roof is made of steel. Downstairs they have a vault with a door made by a bank security company. I had a total of 14 men there, and they held out for 12 hours, until help came. The only reason they lost is I wasn't there to lead them. I was out of position. I was in Antarctica on a wild goose chase." 

"Whoever set you up must have been very good. That doesn't happen to you Lucius; no one sneaks up on you." 

"All I was able to find out is the moneyman funded it out of Kansas City. By the time I got there, they found him in the Mississippi River cut to pieces. Dead men don't talk, and all my leads dried up. It could have been the Kansas City Organization, the Chicago people, or anyone else for that matter. They were after William's daughter, Patricia. My men didn't let them get her, and they paid a very dear price protecting her. That was 22 years ago, and it still hurts today." 

"We all lost men in Kosovo and we put it behind us so we could move forward." 

"That's the difference between you and me Dan. You can forget your men. Each man in my unit was trained by me. They belonged to me. In Kosovo, I brought them all home, because I led them into battle. They followed my orders. I led them, not my sergeants. To this day I can tell you the name, rank, and serial number of every man I ever lead. I wouldn't trade them for any other soldier in the Army, because I trained every single one of them. They never drank, and they never took drugs. We were the most highly decorated unit to fight in that stupid, fucked up war." 

"Gentlemen, we are getting off the subject again. Let's return to the present and think about something else. Sooner or later they are going to figure out I am not in New York. They will find out I am down here and they will tell the Vice President about it. What could they do to me down here?" 

Dan opened his eyes in fright. "Do you think he would try to blow up the Beach Ball?" 

"He gave the order to blow up Even's two armored cars. I wouldn't be a reach for him to try to blow up the spacecraft." 

"Where did you get that information from William?" 

"Congressman Horace Bordeaux told me. He couldn't testify to it, because he didn't have any paperwork to back it up. Vice President Silver told him to have it done. Bordeaux contacted the people at Advanced Logarithms. They make the brains for the missiles that fly off our drones. They took two rockets that were supposed to be used for flight testing and filled them with explosives. They took the drone out for a ride 200 miles northwest of Denver. By the time the rockets hit the trucks the drone landed. It was taken apart, and stored in the back of a truck. The rest is history." 

Delicious knocked on the door, walked into William's office, and overheard part of the conversation. She put up a finger, and asked to be recognized. 

"Delicious, how can I help you?" 

"Can you put me on speaker; I think I can help all of you." 

"Go ahead." 

"My dad thought about someone trying to blow up the Beach Ball five years ago. He had an identical model made, and it is ready to be shipped here, anytime we want it. Supposedly, it will fool everyone that works here. We're getting it for the price of a sticker on the outside of the real thing." 

William asked, "Who is the other Beach Ball being made by?" 

"You have to promise not to laugh." 

"Delicious this is not a laughing matter." 

"It was made in the blimp hanger at Goodyear." 

"Why are all the scientists here, if they are making it up there?" 

"Mister Zabo, Goodyear made one out of a thin latex and rubber material. When it gets here, we have to blow it up." 

"Your father thought this up?" 

"Everyone tells me my father's crazy." 

"Crazy like a fox! That's the funniest thing I have ever heard of." 

"I laughed when I first heard it." 

The three men on the telephone followed suit. 

Dan said, "If we announce that we are taking the spaceship out of the hanger, at twilight, to verify the star navigation charts against the nighttime sky, it could draw them out. We can say everyone will be there: The chief administrator William Zabo, all our scientists, and every man and woman who has worked on the spacecraft since the very beginning. It will be the first, and last time the 'GOOD LUCK' will be outside the hanger, until the day it is ready to fly off into deep space. It will be too much of a temptation for them to resist." 

William asked, "What do we do once we get them here?" 

Dan said, "That's easy, we kill all of them except one. That will be Lucius's friend." 

"That would be mighty nice of you Dan. I would get angry if you killed him." 

****************** 

"Hello Patricia; it's dad how are you?" 

"Dad what's wrong, you sound awful." 

"I'm going to be sending Jemma and Patrick to you. They have to be kept safe, because there is a contract out on us. I am staying here, to draw them to me. They will be coming to you with a large protection detail. Is that okay?" 

"Dad you know it is. I would do anything for them and you." 

"Do you really mean that Patti, because if you do I have something else I want you to do for me, and it's close to being illegal." 

"Will it make our families safer dad?" 

"I can guarantee it will make us all safer." 

"Tell me what to do, and I will take care of it." 

"I need you to dust off three of your old programs. You have to find out everything that's going on with Jim Pierce of Advanced Algorithms. I have a feeling he's been stealing money from the government for a long time. 

He is hooked up with William Stevens, and it was Advanced Algorithms who fired the rockets at Even's armored cars. The order came from the Vice President personally. 

I want you to find out where he has hidden his money. I'm sure their money tied in together. There should be hundreds of millions of dollars in their accounts, if not billions. 

Transfer it into one of my accounts, and I will feed it back to the government. With your help I will be able to tell them who stole it from them and how. They should love that story." 

"How soon should I expect Jemma and Patrick? I will get two of the houses in tiptop shape before they get here with their support team." 

"I would say two or three days." 

"I will take care of it dad. The other matter will take me 10 days to two weeks. I'm a little bit rusty." 

"They are going to try to blow up the Beach Ball Patti. We have a plan in action to take care of that possibility." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 18



"I'll take care of that other matter within a week." 

"That's my girl. I love you Patricia. You should talk to your friend that might not only be a local policeman." 

"I will take care of it dad. Even when you're under stress you can be funny." 

************ 

85. Affection or Love 

"Christian Chase you are a dead man. I should never have allowed you to talk me into going on that boat. I almost drowned, I am nauseous, and I am all wet." 

"I love looking at you all wet, but I think I'd better by you a T-shirt or sweatshirt to cover you. Your breasts look marvelous the way they are. I am the only one that should see them, not every person in Canada." 

Cassie looked down and screamed. Her white blouse and tiny white bra had turned transparent, and her nipples could clearly be seen. 

"Buy me something you asshole, or you'll never see them again." 

"You forget Cassie, this is the first time I am seeing them." 

"You pervert, buy me at top." 

A few moments later Christian came back with a sweatshirt. 

"Can I have one more look before you put this on?" 

"That's crossing the line Christian." 

"I won't give you the sweatshirt." 

"I hate you Christian. Hand me the sweatshirt, and look closely, because this is going to be the briefest look imaginable." 

Cassie bent at the waist and threw the sweatshirt on, before putting her arms in. 

"I didn't see anything Cassie. You bent down; you cheated." 

"I did not. If you were lying on the floor, you would have gotten in eye full." 

"Next time you make a promise, I'm going to have you write it down and have it notarized. That was breach of promise and you know it." 

"Poor Christian, dying to see his sister's tits, and he missed out." 

"You do realize how good I am with computers and their accessories. I could install hidden cameras in the bathroom to watch you tinkle and shower. I could keep those for my private collection or post them on YouTube. I could make you a very popular young woman." 

"You should never make empty threats big brother. Doing that would hurt you as much as it would hurt me." 

"I hate it when you use logic to defeat my ill-gotten ideas." 

"You get to sleep, and cuddle with me every night. I know you want more, but I'm not ready yet. I love you Christian. I love you more every day because of the way you treat me. My problem is you have treated me this way every day of my life. How am I supposed to find the difference between the two? Is it the love and affection I have for my brother, who has always treated me special; or is that special love I should feel for the man I want to marry? I haven't been able to isolate those two feelings. I'm just not sure, and until I am I can't say 'YES'." 

"I will not rush you. I have loved you for a very long time. You have only known about this special love I feel for you for a little more than three weeks. I don't want you to jump over the falls if you're not sure. Take your time; it is a very big decision." 

"I'm hungry Christian, what do you want to eat?" 

"You want me to lose weight remember? In order to do what you want I have to have a low-calorie lunch. Let's go back to the hotel, and I'll eat you." 

"Three tries, using three different tactics, in three weeks. The answer is still no, because it's crossing the line." 

"Can you blame a man for trying?" 

"If you were any other man I would've slapped your face. I didn't slap you, did I?" 

"So at some time in the future, I have a chance of crossing that line." 

"Maybe, perhaps, possibly, perchance, mayhap, it could happen, it's a possibility, neither yes, or no, you might have a chance." 

"Sister, I believe you stole my line, and studied the dictionary at length just for this moment." 

"Brother, it was not just for this moment. It fits several scenarios and I could have used it at any one of them." 

"Would you like a pizza?" 

"What happened to your diet?" 

"Your legs were closed." 

"Stop that Christian; I couldn't walk if my legs were closed." 

*************** 

As they sat in the Italian restaurant waiting for their meal, they talked about everything they had ever done together. Cassie's mind was awhirl with the little things her brother remembered about her life in detail. It was like he catalogued her every waking hour, and never said a word. He knew every attempt she made at having a boyfriend, but could not get Callum out of her mind. Each failed attempt, and each crying night. It was always Callum, and there was not a thing she could do about it. She was as hooked on him, as he was hooked on her. She never knew about the nights he went to bed and didn't sleep because he was crying over her. 

Thankfully, lunch arrived; a large pizza, extra cheese with green olives, and a large bowl of minestrone soup. 

Cassie attacked the pizza, while Christian slurped his soup. They continued talking during their meal, but on lighter subjects. When they were full they sat back and looked at the devastation in front of them. 

"Cassie, you ate half of a large pie? How do you stay so tiny?" 

"I don't know, maybe it's in my genes?" 

"Your ass certainly fills out those jeans." 

"I'm not going to humor you by answering that. Aren't you going to have any pizza?" 

"I was told I have to lose weight. I was told I couldn't eat what I want to eat, so I had soup instead. If I start eating pizza, I won't finish until I eat the box it came in." 

"That's the biggest part of your problem Christian, you have no control." 

"I am sleeping with the most beautiful woman on God's green earth, and I have not raped her 1000 times. Don't you dare tell me I don't have control over my body." 

"I'm sorry Christian, I stand corrected." 

"Your apology is accepted. Let's have them wrap up the pizza, and take it with us just in case you get hungry again. This way you'll have a choice of eating the pizza, or me." 

Cassie grinned. "You never stop, do you?" 

"Friends have sex all the time." 

"We are not just friends; we are brother and sister, and therein lies my problem." 

"I have always considered us friends, as well as brother and sister. I never treated you any differently because of our familial relationship." 

"Why didn't you have any friends of your own Christian?" 

"I was more interested in computers. No one else in town seemed to have the same interest level except dad. We spent countless hours together, while you were at college. We had an absolute blast patenting everything from toys to subroutines to detect identity theft. Many Fortune 500 companies use our computer packages to protect their computers from being compromised by an outside source." 

"All that stopped when I came home?" 

"Mom and dad thought it was wonderful that I wanted to spend time with you. I worked on my computer at night, and got 4 to 6 hours sleep every morning, because you got up late." 

"You did all that because of me." 

"How many times am I going to have to tell you, I was in love with you then, and I am in love with you now. I would go through heaven and hell just to be with you." 

"This is so hard Christian. I have always loved and adored you as a brother. You have always protected me. You have been there when I was hurting, and when I was happy. I am just so confused." 

"I am going to take you back to Patti's. Being this close to me is not helping you, it's hurting you. You need space. I'm going to go home, pack up my things, and move. I'll set up shop somewhere, open my own business, and start a new life. At least now we know where each other stands. You haven't said yes, but you haven't said no. That gives me hope that one day you may come to me. My door will always be open to you, because nobody else could fill that space in my heart that is reserved for you."  

"I'm sorry Christian, I really am." 

******************* 

When Laura received the text that they were coming back early she knew something went wrong. Their plans for the couple had not panned out the way they hoped it would, and she was worried her family would have to pick up the pieces of two broken lives. 

When they parked by the garage, and the two of them started walking towards the house, they were holding hands and smiling. 

Patti asked, "What's wrong with this picture?" 

Anna said, "I don't know mom, but I think we should keep our mouths shut, until they tell us what's going on." 

"Welcome back, are you too hungry?" 

"I have him on a diet; he's only gained two pounds while we were on vacation." 

"I did not; I lost five pounds chasing after her." 

"I repeat my question, are you hungry?" 

"Yes we are, because she refuses to let me eat her." 

"Christian stopped that." 

"It's true is in it?" 

"Patti do you have something bigger than your paddle. I have to knock some sense into my brother's head." 

"There will be no hitting in this house until after we find out what went on in Niagara. After that, it's no holds barred." 

"Mom did you say no holds barred, or know holes barred?" 

"Anna for a virgin, you have a very filthy mind." 

"How do you think I've remained a virgin mother? If the right guy doesn't show up soon, I'm putting an ad in the paper and selling it to the highest bidder." 

"Remember little girl, your father has a ton of money, and his equipment would send you around the world; twice." 

"Mom that would be incest." 

"You are the one selling it on the open market. Doesn't that make you a prostitute?" 

"You always look at the dark side." 

"Isn't that what mothers are for? If the mother shows the child what she's doing, she may turn to see the light." 

"You are no fun mother." 

"Yes, I know, especially when I'm right." 

Laura asked Cassie, "What happened up there, and what did you two decide to do?" 

Christian replied for her, "Nothing, and Nothing." 

"Would you care to expand upon those two 'Nothings'?" 

"Cassie, I believe that explains everything that went on in Canada, don't you?" 

"Yes, that about sums it up." 

"You two realize I have a gun, and I am licensed to use it. Details, you two, give us the details." 

"If you want us to tell you what happened while we were in bed together the answer is, "NOTHING." 

"If you want us to tell you if we made a decision about our future together the answer is "NOTHING has been decided. Cassie's emotions are too confused at this time to make a logical decision. I am leaving to give her the space and time she needs to make that decision. 

I'm going home to pack up my toys, and move to either Nevada, or New Mexico. If and when she makes her decision to join me she will. If she doesn't she won't. We know we love each other. It's a very hard choice for her to decide if she loves me only as a brother, or if she can love me as a husband. Only she can make that decision, and she can't do it if I am around." 

Patti asked, "Is this what you decided too, Cassie?" 

"Yes it is. It's going to be very hard to see him go, but it has to be that way. He knows everything about me, down to the smallest detail imaginable. I never realized how deeply he loved me until we had this time together. I need time to wrap my head around this and make a conclusion using it, instead of my heart. If I only used my heart, I would have said 'YES' two weeks ago. 

"Has Callum asked about us?" 

"Yes he has." 

"Is that answer, the equal to my answer 'Nothing'?" 

"You could call it getting even." 

"Please tell me what he said." 

"He wanted to know if you two were getting married or just going to live together." 

"Don't tell me he knew. I would feel like a complete idiot." 

"When would you like to start feeling like an idiot? He's with Junie why don't you talk to him?" 

"What could I possibly say to the man I always loved, and never loved me." 

"I'm sure you two will figure something out." 

"Do you want me to come with you Cassie?" 

"No Chris, I want to do this myself." 

************** 

" 

Hello Callum, how is Junie doing?" 

"All the readings are nominal Cassie. She seems to be doing great. Two months into stasis, and not one problem. We still have a long way to go." 

"She knows we're here for her, and the last thing she saw was your eyes. She's going to make it, I'm sure of it." 

"How can you be so sure Cassie, I have doubts every second." 

"I know, because if I had your ring on my finger, and the last thing I saw before I went to sleep where your eyes, there is no way on this earth I would die before I got back to you." 

"Why wasn't it me Callum? You knew I loved you, and you never looked back at me. Why?" 

"I have asked that question to myself more times than you can imagine, Cassie. You are the most beautiful girl in Cottonwood, and you wanted me. The most beautiful girl in college, and you wanted me. I could never understand why that connection never made it in my mind. I could have taken you to my bed every night and been very happy. However, I knew in my heart I would never marry you because I did not love you that way. Why, I don't know why. I just don't know why. 

I looked at the way Christian looked at you, but I could never look at you the same way he did. His eyes ate up every inch of your body and soul like no other man ever could. I knew he loved you before you went off to college with me. I wanted to look at you that way, but the feelings weren't there. Those feelings were never there while I screwed around with every other woman that passed me by. 

Then all of a sudden Junie walks into my life, with a shattered history, a destroyed spirit, and a broken heart. I look at her eyes she melts my heart. I knew instantly I had to have her in my life forever. The feelings Christian has for you, I felt for Junie. It hit me so hard I never recovered. Finally, that day in the computer room, I couldn't take it anymore. I picked her up threw or over my shoulder walked to the pool, and kissed her. I don't do that Cassie. I never have, at least not in public. When I got her out of the pool, and kissed her, that was it for me. I was sure. 

I made an imprint of one of her rings in a bar of soap. I brought it to a jeweler, and had him make up a ring for her. I had a feeling she would fight me on it, which she did. However, I insisted, and she finally said yes. If she doesn't walk out of this box in 10 months, I don't know what I'll do." 

"Cal, Junie is going to walk out of that box, straight into your arms. You gave her a new lease on life. You made her whole again. She loves you as much as you love her. You will both have long and happy lives together. Don't think about it any other way." 

"Thanks Cassie, I needed that assurance, and coming from you it means more to me than you can imagine." 

"You know Cal, I thought I came here to talk about me, and we wound up talking about you and Junie. Patti said we would find something to talk about. That woman must have a crystal ball somewhere in this house." 

"It's not a crystal ball, its microphones and speakers." 

Cassie looked around and looked for the offending objects. 

"Patti that's not fair; it's invasion of privacy." 

"How do you think I kept track of Robert and the girls when they went into the barn with their beau's? The girls were easy, because the boys never got anywhere. Robert on the other hand got everywhere fast. He was like his father, only faster." 

"Callum, it's the dinnertime, what would you like to eat besides the kitchen table." 

"She's here in front of me." 

'Slap.' 

"You bastard, all those years I waited for you to say that, and you say it after you get engaged. I should take a picture of your face and show it to Junie when she wakes up." 

"Don't worry sis, I'm bringing my Nikon with me, and we will show that picture to everyone at home." 

"Death will not treat you kindly Christian." 

"I know Cal, but for a few seconds in this life I will be able to laugh." 

"Come ahead then, your death awaits you." 

"Smile!" 

Callum saw a super-bright flash go off. 

"Turn your head a little bit more to the right please Cal. I couldn't get Cassie's palm print in from this distance. My telephoto lens isn't that great at middle distance." 

"I'm going to get you Chris, and when I do, I'm going to drown you." 

"By the time you find me, the pictures of your face with my sister's handprint on it will be all over Cottonwood. Vengeance is mine 'sayth' the Lord." 

"You are not God." 

Another flash went off and Callum became furious. 

"Cassie will you watch Junie for a little while?" 

"No, I'm going in for dinner. You should have been nicer to me." 

"You little witch you are going to let your brother send those pictures aren't you?" 

Cassie stood on her tiptoes and kissed Callum. 

Another bright flash went off. 

"That was perfect sis, you can leave now." 

"I love you Callum, I think I always will." 

"I have no idea why I can't say those words to you Cassie. You are the best friend I ever had." 

"Ouch, that hurts." 

"I'm so sorry. I can't tell you how sorry I am it wasn't you." 

****************** 

Five minutes later, emails were received at the homes of Alan and Susan Robbins, and Harold and Callalily Chase. 

Shortly afterwards the war was on between Alan and Callie. Their phones almost melted because of the heat of their conversation. 

Within a few hours the news made it to the church, and to the ears of the Bishop. He stopped what he was doing, took out his writing tablet, and began changing the subject for this week's homily. 

When he was able to download pictures, and put them into perspective, he shook his head. 

"Children; and he didn't mean Callum and Cassie. He meant their parents, Alan Robbins and Callie Chase. He was going to have to restrain both of them when they came to church Sunday. Otherwise there would be a war when he discussed the problem of 'Children having to PARENT their 'parents', because they refused to grow up." 

****************** 

"Logan, will you stay with Newton for a short time please; I have to speak to Gray. He can play with the computer all he wants. If you see it start to smoke you can toast him like a marshmallow." 

"Mommy, grandma says that wasn't funny." 

"Tell grandma yes it was." 

"Hello Gray anything interesting happening today?" 

"Yeah, I think so. Take a look at this equation. Watch how the bottom drops out, when it reaches this point." 

"That shouldn't happen, Gray. The computer must be wrong. It must be a malfunction." 

"That's exactly what I thought. I went to another computer and ran into the same problem. It happens every time. I need Gordon to take a look at it." 

"Gordon is at the N.E.S.T. working on the star charts. Don't shoot me, but I want to try someone else." 

"Who do you have in mind?" 

"I'll bring him to you. Don't touch anything." 

"Come on monster, daddy needs help." 

"Go get him Newton, daddy's right around the corner." 

Newton turned the corner and saw his father. 

"Daddy!" 

Gray bent down, and gathered his son in his arms. 

"Hello big guy, have you been playing with our computer today?" 

"Only for a little while, mommy said you needed help." 

He lifted his eyes and looked at Delicious. She nodded her head. 

"Okay, will you help me with this? Watch what happens with these numbers as they come across the screen. Then all of a sudden instead of continuing across they drop down. That shouldn't happen. Can you tell me why?" 

"It is supposed to happen, daddy. It's how you open and close a wormhole." 

Delicious chuckled as Gray searched for his chair to sit down. 

"Newton, what is a wormhole?" 

"It's a tunnel through time and space dad. Didn't they teach you that in school?" 

"No, I was sick that day." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. The scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

87. Repercussions

"What the hell happened, Jim? You said these people were professionals, and every one of them got caught. I hope like hell they can't be traced to us, otherwise we'd better pack up and leave now."

"There is no way it can lead back to us William. There are four cutouts and two mailboxes between us. Their payments went through a European bank, and we have no ties to any banking establishment in Europe. As to what went wrong, I have no idea. From the newspaper reports, Zabo and his family were not at home. You would think they would make sure they were in there, before they attacked the place."

"That would seem like the logical thing to do, but these guys turned out to be morons."

A member of Pierce's staff walked into the room and waited to be recognized.

"Yes Jeffrey."

"Sir, Mister Zabo is being interviewed on television."

"Put it on."

"I have been an investor all my life. I rarely interact with people, and do most of my trading by wire. I have no idea who or why anyone would attack my home, because there is little of value in it. We have two safe rooms which my wife and son can get into easily.

As far as I am concerned, if they get me they can go to hell. My wife has restricted access to my funds, because of this possibility. I will not allow anyone to extort money from me. Let them go out and get a job."

"How long have you been in Temple, Mister Zabo?"

"I've been here more than four months, because of an illness to a dear friend, Doctor Even Luck. I am the Chief Administrator of the project to get his spacecraft to the stars, while he undergoes treatment for cancer.

I am happy to announce that the exterior of the spacecraft is completed. However, there is much work still to be done on the interior.

One evening, within the next year, we will be taking the spaceship out of the hanger for testing of its celestial navigation capability. We will be aligning our guidance systems with the nighttime stars. Everyone who has ever worked on the spacecraft will be here. They deserve a party for the fantastic work they've done, and this will be a party the likes of which they have never seen before."

"As secretive as your program has been, since the beginning, is the press going to be invited?"

"Could we keep your helicopters away? I don't think so. In an abundance of caution we are going to invite the press to the unveiling of our spacecraft."

"Have you given it a name?"

"Yes, we have named it in honor of the leader of this project, Doctor Even Luck. We have named it, "The Best Luck."

***********

"Turn that damn thing off. I've seen enough of that gloating turkey. Find out everything about him and his connection to that space company, especially if he's financially involved in it. If he is, I want to blow to fucker up, and hit him where it hurts the most: in his wallet. I want to know everything about that place, and I want to know about it yesterday. Do you hear me, Jim? I don't care what it costs; I want that sucker to hurt."

"Isn't this getting a little out of hand William? He didn't do anything wrong. He was on your side. He wanted you to be President. You screwed up not him."

"Do you want me to tell everyone about the little girls you have downstairs, in your soundproof dungeon Jim? You use those girls as your playthings. When they begin to grow breasts, or pubic hair; or they're not fun for you anymore, you ship them off to the Middle East or Japan and get paid handsomely by their new perverts.

If you are in a particularly foul mood, or if one of those little girls becomes disobedient, you kill her with your bare hands, in front of the others, to keep the rest of your harem in line. So don't tell me who screwed up. Do what I tell you to do, and our arrangement will continue to flourish."

"You didn't have to threaten me William. I always do as you ask. It was just a word of caution, because sometimes your heart overrules your head. It is your head that made our arrangement so profitable. It would be a shame to have it go down in flames now. I will make all the arrangements, through our back channels immediately."

"That's the spirit Jim. Make sure the guys that go there don't get caught."

"I wonder if they've been inspected by OSHA lately. It would be a great way to gain access to the entire facility."

"Now you're thinking with a clear head my friend."

**************

"General, we have an eight member team from OSHA here to inspect the facility."

"Keep them there; I will join them in 10 minutes with their escorts."

"May I offer you gentlemen some refreshments? General Morgan and your escorts will be here in 10 minutes."

"I'd like some cold water please. This dust will get to your throat quickly."

"You should work here for a few years. You will wonder why your voice works at all."

***************

Dan Morgan arrived at the main gate of the facility, and walked inside the reception center.

With a big smile on his face he said, "Good Morning gentlemen, who's in charge of this intrepid group?"

"I am general."

With a movement of his arm that was so swift and accurate the man did not see it coming; the general hit him in the face, and knocked him out.

The agents standing behind him raised their weapons, pointing them at the other members of the group. They were too stunned to move.

"Wake the bastard up."

Using the remains of his cold water it was poured on the man's head.

As he regained consciousness his friends helped him up.

The man said, "How dare you attack a government employee?"

"You are government employee like I am a horse's ass. OSHA was here ten weeks ago and gave us fifteen violations, with a six-month time period to correct them. We've been expecting you idiots since the attack on William's home. You will never get close to him. He's not in this building; he's in our main building. He is so deep in the center of it you would have to kill everyone to get to him. We are not rent-a-cops'. We are fully trained tactical agents. If you come after William, you better come ready for war, because that's what you're going to get. Now get the fuck out of here before I get angry."

As they were walking away Dan Morgan yelled, "You, with the grenade in your pocket, you would have died first."

Reflexively, the man reached for the grenade in his pocket. He looked back and saw eight semiautomatic rifles pointed at him. He moved his hand away from it, very carefully.

The group got into their cars, and drove away.

"How did you know general, I didn't notice it?"

"I knew damn well he didn't have a hard on, so I took a guess."

**********************

"Come on Even, it's time to wake up. Please open your eyes and look at me. You are scaring me."

I could hear Jennifer's voice, but everything was still black. I had no dimensional reference. I could not feel anything, not even the beating of my heart. She called to me again, but I couldn't find a way to get to her. She seemed to be coming from everywhere, and nowhere at the same time. I didn't know where to go, or if I could get to her.

I heard her, but I saw, and felt nothing. I remembered what Newton told me about time and space. I tried to think of myself as a cylinder. I was stuck in the middle of time because nothing was moving. Logically I knew I had to be taking up space, even if I was reduced to the size of an atom.

I remembered the quotation, "I think, therefore I am."

I was thinking, and was able to process information. If I was stranded in time, I needed a shortcut to get out of the space I was taking up. I had to make a wormhole. I needed something to cut through the fabric of space I was taking up. This blackness was keeping me from everyone I love.

My mind was functioning. I remembered Doctor Bradley asking me if I was ready for the operation. I remembered Jennifer's lips touching mine, and the burning sensation in my left hand.

Pain, I was supposed to be in pain, but I was free of all sensations; the only part of me that was working was my brain. I needed Newton's pencil, or any other sharp instrument to make a hole for me to climb through to get out of this blackness.

Doctor Bradley took a knife and cut my body open from my sternum to my pubic bone. I concentrated every bit of my mental energy on the knife as it cut me open. I found it speared into the cancerous tumor that was intent on killing me.

It wasn't holding it, I had no hands. I was just charged particle of electrical energy, caught in the vast black void of space, and time. You can't push against something you can't see, touch, or feel with a knife that is attached to the thing that was trying to kill you, but in my mind's eye I tried to move the knife, not knowing if I was doing right or wrong. I could have been pushing the knife through the vacuum of space, or a pool of water.

I said a prayer to the God I discovered in the forests of Alaska. I asked Him if I could see my family one more time before I died. I didn't care if I died. I just wanted the opportunity to say thank you to them for being so wonderful to me, and goodbye, before he took me to His arms.

I lived a life very few people get a chance to live, and I was very grateful for it. I lived a quiet life. I never harmed anyone. I gave money to charities, although maybe not enough. Many of my inventions made this world a better place to live in. I had found my faith later in life than I should have, but I was happy with it now. Most important to me was I found Jennifer, the woman of my dreams, and the love of my life. We were raising a wonderful family together. What else could any man ask for? Well, I guess I just did. I wanted to say goodbye to her and to my family, before I died.

I saw a pinhole shaft of light. My mind pressed forward towards that light. I tried focusing on the knife, with all the remaining conscious energy I had. I was weakening. I wasn't sure how I knew it, I could just sense it. Suddenly, I lost sight of the tip of the knife. My mind went blank, I thought all was lost.

Light Burst Through: Somehow the knife made a larger hole through the fabric of time that I could fit through. I was taken on a ride through a cosmic wormhole of space as my body began to coalesce.

They both caught up with me, and stopped at my hospital bed. I hated both of them equally. As my eyes opened I was racked with a pain I cannot begin to explain with mere words. I wanted to scream out in agony, but I couldn't. Something was blocking my airway. I began to cry.

Jennifer's reaction was the opposite of mine. Hers was Sheer Joy. She was Exuberant.

"Oh Even, thank goodness your back. I was so worried. The doctors said you should have been up hours ago. They were not going to use any artificial means to wake you up; they wanted you to do it on your own. I know you can't talk. You have a tube down your throat to help you breathe. I love you Even. Blink your eyes if you can hear me."

I blinked my eyes, as more tears flowed.

She kissed my eyes, as she kissed my tears away. She cried happy tears.

"Even blink twice for no and three times for yes."

"Do you need pain medication?"

I blinked three times.

"Blink once if the pain is severe, twice if it is very severe, three times if it is unbearable."

I blinked three times.

"I'm going to get the nurse, I'll be right back."

I started blinking twice, repeatedly, not wanting her to leave me. I needed her beside me. I needed to reconnect with life, after the dark of nothingness. I know I preferred the church's version of hell, with its' fire and brimstone, then what I had just been through. Nothing is terrifying. Nothing would drive anyone insane. Nothing should be reserved for the likes of the mass murderers: Lenin, Stalin, Hitler, Perone, Amin, Stakic, and Milosevic. They deserve each other, and NOTHINGNESS!

I felt Jennifer's hand on my arm, as I reopened my eyes. She smiled down at me. I began blinking my eyes twice, over, and over, and over.

"What is it even? What are you trying to tell me?"

I couldn't move. All I could do was blink twice to beg her not to leave me again.

Somehow she got my message.

"Even are you upset because I went to get the nurse?"

I blinked three times. I blinked three times. I blinked three times.

"Okay darling, I will never leave you again. I will be at your side always."

I blinked three times, I blinked three times, and tears roll from my eyes.

Jen kissed the tears away, as she kissed my lips. The damn tube in my throat was annoying the hell out of me, but it was keeping me alive. I guess there was a decent pay off in the end.

Doctor Mozia walked into the room, with an intern at his arm, and a nurse standing beside him.

"Welcome back Doctor Luck. I'll talk, you listen. Your surgery went very well, and was less extensive than we thought it would be. Doctor Bradley was able to resect your pancreas, with a lot less damage than he previously thought. Your lymph nodes were clear, which is a wonderful sign. Everything else went as you were told, with one exception. You are also missing your appendix. Doctor Bradley said he was in the area, and instead of leaving it to chance for some future surgery, he removed it.

Now it is up to your body, and its ability to heal itself. I know you can't feel it, but there is a tube in your navel that is attached to your intestine. For the next three weeks that's how you're going to be eating, while your stomach and the area where your duodenum was heals. When that period is over, we will do microsurgery to remove the tube from your intestine, and suture it closed. Then we will remove the tube from your stomach and suture your navel closed.

As you can see Doctor Luck, from this point forward it is all up to TIME: (WHY DID HE HAVE TO USE THAT DAMN WORD) Healing time, recovery time, and patience. If you are thinking of rushing back to work, you should go to a local gun shop; buy a secondhand weapon, and one bullet. I don't think I have to say anything more about that.

Within a week we will have the results of all the tests of the organs we removed. If they come back benign, you are a very lucky man. You will come back here in nine months for a checkup. If not, you'll be back here in six months to begin a course of radiation and chemotherapy.

The nurse is going to give you medication that is going to put you back to sleep for four hours, and take your pain away. We are going to manage your pain medication very carefully. We don't want you to become addicted to it. Go to sleep Doctor Luck, your healing period has just begun. I am in charge of you now, and I don't like failing."

Jennifer did not let go of my arm, while the doctor talked to me. She did not move from my side, while the nurse injected the medication into my IV line. She kissed my eyes again as they began to close.

"I will be here when you wake up Even; I am not letting you go."

I fell asleep, but I didn't go to that 'Nothing' place again. I was able to see Jennifer smiling at me, and worrying about me. I didn't like that... I had to get better for her. She didn't deserve what I was putting her through. I had to get better. It was my mantra. I had to do it, for my wife, the love of my life.

88. Bumps

Gray was lying in bed next to Delicious, early Sunday morning, rubbing his hand over her moist, velvet skin, when he stopped on her abdomen.

"What the hell is this? You have a bump in your belly."

"Thank God you went to Penn; otherwise you may never have found out that I had a bump in my belly. Do you want to guess what it is?"

"How many guesses do I get?"

"It's a little after 1AM; Newt shouldn't get up until 7 or 8 in the morning; that gives you six or seven hours' worth of guesses. If you're right you take care of Newt all day. If you are wrong, you take care of Newt all day."

"Now there is an offer I can't refuse. First, I have to inspect the bump."

Gray turned on his bedside lamp and kissed his wife.

"Gray the bump is lower."

"I'll get there. I'm just taking the scenic route."

He kissed her jaw, and up to her ear, licking and biting as he went along.

"Gray, we just finished doing that. Look for the bump."

"You said I had until 7 o'clock, don't rush me woman."

He kissed her tenderly, along the back of her neck, and the front for chest. After putting the nipple of her breasts between his teeth, he began feasting on the succulent flesh around it. He knew she was lost, when she started pulling his hair, and her legs wrapped around his ass.

"You're not playing fair Gray. You were just supposed to inspect my belly."

"I'm getting there, look how close I'm getting."

As he switched to her left breast, she moaned and bit her lip.

When Gray finished torturing her breasts, he proceeded down her left flank and pushed her legs apart. He suckled on the tender white flesh on the inside of her left thigh, moving towards her center. As his lips reached the junction of her thigh and her body, Delicious raised her hips anticipating his tongue entering her.

It didn't. His tongue moved over her pubic ridge, and onto her right thigh. He licked and kissed the flesh as he did on the left side, as he continued torturing her.

She pulled his hair. "Gray you missed the bump."

"I guess I'll have to make a U-turn."

As he moved back towards her middle, Delicious was flowing like a mountain stream. He knew he was going to get hell for what he had planned, but it would be worth it, just to hear her laugh afterwards.

His tongue touched her labia and her hips reached for the sky. He placed his hands underneath her butt to keep her in that position. He feasted on her outer lips, until he recognized the signs of her impending orgasm.

He stopped, placed his mouth at the opening to her vagina, and said, "Hello in there!"

Mad; mad was not the word for her. She was furious. She closed her legs around his neck and started pounding his head with her fists.

All Gray could do was laugh.

"You bastard, what are you laughing about?"

"You are seventeen years old again, and I never want you to change. You did exactly what I knew you would do, and I love you."

"Grayson that was mean."

He pulled her down to him and kissed her. "Delicious, it was also funny as hell."

She hit him with a pillow, as she joined his laughter.

He pushed her down on the bed, and kissed her baby bump.

"I see you finally found it."

"It's not an it, according to your mother. It's Teddy."

"I can't figure out what her full name would be. I would never name a child Theodora."

"Just check all the baby names that join with Teddy. If nothing comes close, we will name her Teddy with and 'i' at the end."

"Okay, do you think you can give me my orgasm now? You stole the last one from me by talking to my baby."

"Teddy is our baby, courtesy of your mother, and yes, out of the goodness of my heart, I will give you your orgasm."

"Doctor Thyme, my mother said that Newton would have four brothers and two sisters. She didn't say who the father would be. Be nice, or it won't be you."

"How much would you like to bet?"

"You were taking an awful lot for granted."

"No I'm not; I just know how much I love you. I know you love me the same way. I'm not going anywhere, are you?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



"Yes I am, many light years away."

"I guess Newton and Teddy are staying with me."

"Yes they are, in the stasis units next to mine."

Gray kissed her, and his hand traveled to her breast.

"Sometimes Doctor Thyme, I don't like you."

"Sometimes Mrs. Thyme, I just want to bite that lip."

"Which one, I have four of them."

"Potty mouth."

"It's the truth; I'm just waiting for an answer."

"I have a terrible memory. I always have to go back to the beginning and start all over again."

"If you must, you must. I have everyplace you touched memorized, so don't miss anything, or you will have to start all over again for third time, or a fourth, or a fifth, or more. This could take you all night."

"I think I could be up for it."

"If you're not, I could give you a hand, or a mouth to help you rise to the occasion."

"That is a very kind offer Madam; I may take you up on it."

"Do you think you could start now, I'm getting cold?"

Gray kissed her, until she relaxed; then dove between her thighs and nibbled on her clit.

"That wasn't the beginning you moron."

He didn't acknowledge her. He continued torturing her pussy, as she pounded him with a pillow. It didn't take long for her to acquiesce to his tongue-lashing.

"Oh fuck it." She lay back and lost herself to the feelings consuming her traitorous body.

******************

They both watch Newton Sunday, because neither had the power to do it on their own. Every time they looked at one another they smiled. If they passed close enough to one another, they would kiss, or simply touch.

Newton was not blind to what was going on around him.

"Why won't grandma tell me why you and dad are so happy today mom?"

"Maybe you're supposed to ask me or dad that question."

"Mom, why are you and dad so happy today?"

"Your father and I had a very intimate night last night. We talked and we had a lot of fun together. We even talked about your sister; and where her name may have come from. It gave us a very good feeling about each other, and it brought us closer together. Is that what you wanted to know?"

"Does that mean you had sex last night?"

"Yes it does; that's what I meant when I said your father and I were intimate last night."

"Why didn't you just say you had sex?"

"There are nice ways of saying things, and there are rough ways of saying things. I am your mother, and I want to say things to you the nice ways."

"Okay, I understand now; thank you mom."

**************

"I will never get that move right, Monty."

"If you don't, you will be picking yourself up off the floor every time you make that mistake. It's all in your balance. If you don't keep your right foot balanced on the floor, you're going down, and come up with more bumps on your body than you can count."

"I watch that move on tape. I visualize it in my mind, and I practice it. Every time I come up against a partner, the damn foot moves, and I don't understand why."

"Gordon, you are anticipating the move. Instead of letting the aggressor come at you and making contact. You are picking the foot up off the floor, and putting yourself in a weaker position. Once your opponent hits you, you are allowing yourself to be turned. Once that happens, your opponent is in the stronger position, and you are going down."

"You make it sound so easy. Can I try it again please?"

"Janet, Gordon, fight!"

"God dammit I did it again."

"Watch your mouth Gordon."

"Yes ma'am."

"Again please

"Janet, Gordon, fight!"

"That's better, you didn't take her down, but you didn't go down either.

"Can you nail my right foot to the floor please? This is getting ridiculous. I can feel it moving before I ask it to move."

"You're not supposed to ask it to move Gordon. It's supposed to come naturally. Do you have to think about one and one equaling two or do you just know it?"

"I know it."

"It's the same thing with this movement. Once you realize you know it, it becomes second nature to you, and you don't have to think about it. Janet again."

"I'm going to teach you a new hold this time Gordon. I'm not putting you on your ass; I'm putting you on your head."

"At least I'll have a bump on a different area of my body."

"Janet, Gordon, fight."

"Yes Gordon yes that was perfect. What did you do differently that time?"

"I didn't want Janet to scramble my brains, so I must've reacted faster."

"You reacted, you didn't act. The movement is meant for a reaction to her action. You used her energy against her, and you put her ass on the ground."

"I'm sorry Janet; I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Hurt me, my ass. It was the most fun I had all day. It gets boring winning all the time. You're not going to win every time, but you are going to continue learning. Shall we do it again?"

"Are you going to hurt me this time?"

"Abs-a-fucking-lutely."

"That's what I thought."

"Janet, Gordon, fight."

"Don't let her go Gordon, get her down. Get her down; you are in the stronger position."

"OOOWWWWWWWWW! She bit me."

"You are also on the ground. She won. You lost."

"She didn't fight fair."

"When you are fighting for your life, there is no such thing as fair. What would've happened if she kicked you in the balls?"

"I would be seeing stars, instead of visiting them."

"You can't give anyone a break. You have to go for the kill. You cannot allow them any advantage. Take the opponent down as soon as you can when you are in the superior position. They will take whatever weakness they see and try to reverse your power position."

"You cheated Janet."

"Pussy."

"I'm going to stuff your face into the mat, and sit on it."

"Dream on little girl, dream on. I'm going to bite your nose."

"Janet, Gordon, fight.

"Don't let her take you down Gordon, don't let her do it. There you go, twist her, take her down now. Force her head down. Kick her leg out. Good, twist her arm up, you've got her. Force her head down, down, perfect. Sit on her head like you promised."

"Get off me Gordon, you smell like shit."

"Let me help you up Janet, it's the polite thing to do for little girls."

"Don't start patting yourself on the back Gordon. Two wins out of seventeen attempts does not make you immortal. Congratulations on this last attempt; you put up a good fight."

"Thanks Janet."

Monty asked, "What did you do wrong Gordon?"

"I moved too soon again. I'm sorry Monty. I just need more practice time."

"Gordon things are going to happen around here in the not-too-distant future. You may need to defend yourself, and your family. You have to take these lessons to heart. These are no longer games; this is preparation for the real thing. This is preparation for war. The faster you learn the better you can defend yourself and those you love.

When your dad is able to come back to work, he is not going to be half the man he was before. It is going to take a long time for him to regain his strength. You may have to defend him against an unknown enemy. You have got to be prepared to help him. Learn faster. Try harder."

"I will Monty, I promise."

"Good, get into the ice bath."

"Monty..."

"Five, four, three,

SPLASH

"Shit, it's cold.

"It's not cold Gordon, say it."

"You told me never to lie."

"It's not cold Gordon, is it?"

"No Monty it's quite refreshing."

"Excellent Gordon, your attitude is improving. Next time watch your language."

"Yes ma'am."

"Fifteen minutes Gordon, not one minute less."

"Yes ma'am. Are we going to run to work in the morning?"

"Are you up to it?"

"I believe I'm ready for it."

"It's 10 ½ miles Gordon, and then you want to put in a full day's work. Are you sure about that?"

"Yes Monty, I think I'm ready."

"Good boy, I think you are ready too. We will leave at 5:50 AM, so you can shower and have some breakfast, before you begin working."

"I'll be the one running with his eyes closed."

"I'll be the one behind you with the Taser. Ten six minute miles, that should be interesting. All you have to do is picture a pretty girl's ass in a bikini, running ahead of you, and you will be fine."

"Am I allowed to see one of those in real life first?"

"No one told you to be brilliant. If you were a normal child, you would have seen plenty of them by now. It's a trade-off; which would you prefer, a pretty girl or a spaceship?"

"I'd like a spaceship during the day, and a pretty girl to hold me close at night. Is that asking too much?"

"You're fifteen years old, it will happen soon enough."

*************

89. Again

"What the hell happened this time Jim?"

"Those assholes blew their cool. I didn't take any chances William. Those men work for OSHA, but they weren't working for them at that time. They all took time off so they could work for me. They've done it before.

This General Morgan scared the piss out of them, when he knocked Freddy on his ass. Instead of showing Morgan their identification badges to prove that they worked for the government, they backed out of there like wolves with their tails between their legs.

It wouldn't matter if OSHA had been there ten weeks ago or ten days ago. OSHA can show up anywhere, at any time, to do a surprise inspection. They should have had the run of the place, and they walked away with nothing."

"They didn't learn anything at all?"

"The only thing Freddy said was Zabo is deep inside the headquarters building, and if we were going to go after him, we had better be prepared for war, because that is what we are going to get."

"How many drones do you have Jim?"

"One and it's barely flyable."

"One wouldn't do much damage anyhow. Let's leave that as a last resort. Do they have to pull licenses for those agents?"

"I'm not sure, but I can know within thirty minutes."

"Find out, and if they need licenses find out how many agents they have at that facility. If we're going to buy an army, I'm going to buy an overwhelming army, like we did in Desert Storm. We are going to run over that place and smash it."

"Whatever you say William; I'll have that information for you shortly."

***************

"They show 290 licenses for agents at the facility, but the clerk said it doesn't mean all of them have been issued to employees."

"Alright, this is what I want you to do Jim. Rent an aircraft and do aerial surveillance of that place for seven days. Get good cameras so they can use them at a relatively high altitude so the people on the ground don't get suspicious. I want motion pictures, and stills."

"I will use men from my company to do it. If they screw this up, I'll kill them myself."

************

"Margaret, I'm going to have to hire a translator for you. I'm getting complaints from all over the building."

"Complaints from whom Dan, and what are they complaining about?"

"Should I put the 'what' first Margaret? If they're asking for a translator, it must be because of your speech impediment. I'm the only one in the building that understands you, and that is a minor miracle. Either you are going to have to learn how to speak English, or you're going to have to slow down so normal people can understand you."

"Can't you just hear it now general? I will answer the phone:

General Morgan's office, this is Margaret his secretary speaking. How may I help you? One moment please.

General Morgan's office, this is Margaret's translator speaking. How may I help you? One moment please.

This is Margaret advising you that the general will not be in his office today until after 1 PM. One moment please.

This is Margaret's translator advising you that Margaret said the general would not be in his office today until after 1 PM. One moment please.

"This is Margaret again; I hope this delay in communicating with you is not frustrating you in the slightest. I know it's bugging the hell out of me. One moment while I transfer you to my translator"

"This is Margaret's translator..."

"Who's complaining Dan?"

"No one, I just love the color your face becomes when I get you riled up."

"How would you like your coffee in the morning general; with, or without?"

"You haven't noticed I'm bringing in McDonald's coffee in the morning?"

"You haven't noticed I've been bringing in these little clear plastic cups in the morning?"

"Margaret you wouldn't."

"Can I do anything for you general; I normally do special things for you, especially in the morning?"

"Margaret you're despicable."

"I am, aren't I? I am also irreplaceable."

"Let me know when Lucius gets here please."

"Is that the same Lucius as...?"

"Yes it's the same Lucius as last time."

"Are you two still fighting?"

"Let's just say there is a truce in place."

"Does that mean bare knuckles or boxing gloves?"

"It means we're not fighting. We are on the same side."

"Should I put you two on a timer to see how long it's going to last?"

"Margaret, if I had left him alone that fucking war would have been over three years sooner than it was. Unfortunately my conscience would never have let me live with it."

"Thank you for that Dan, I appreciate the sentiment."

"God damn you Lucius, why do you always walk in at the perfect moment."

"Is he still bothering you about that wonderful accent of yours, Margaret?"'

"No Colonel, he just does it in the morning, afternoon, and in the evening. He's quite affable during the rest of my day."

"He won't let you work for anybody else I see."

"He wouldn't know where the lighter is for his cigars Colonel."

"Those things will kill him Margaret. It's good to see you again.

"You too Lucius."

"Hello General."

"Colonel, what do you have for me?"

"A proposed battle plan sir."

"Okay, lay it out, and talk me through it."

**********************

"Beginning with their hierarchy, we know they act irrationally. There is a probability of seventy percent the former vice president will order a direct assault on his main target; which we believe will be the Spacecraft. There is a forty percent probability he will go after Mister Zabo as his first target. The other options are across-the-board but all of them are in single digits. He could try to take out our scientists and the people working on the interior of spacecraft. It would delay the project several years, but those range at nine percent or below.

We believe he is going to want to crush your effort into the sand you are built on. We can expect to face overwhelming odds; two or three to one. Some of his forces will be mechanized, but most will be ground pounders. Don't be surprised if William Silver is with them. He may want to shoot Mister Zabo himself.

They will come from three different quadrants. Two will be diversionary; but the main one will be a frontal assault from the West. You have the Army base to your east. It is possible we may be able to get help from them if they think they are under attack when they hear automatic weapons going off. We can help that along by setting up loudspeakers, pointing them at the base, and waking up the base commander.

You can expect flanking attacks from 70 to 100 men, who will try to pin you down using machine guns and automatic weapons. Their plan will include using our guests to keep you from getting an organized defense set up quickly.

During this time, their frontal assault from the west will move in, without firing a shot, until they are seen. All hell will break loose as soon as they know they been spotted. Personally, I believe their main objective will be to destroy the Spacecraft. If they can get it to fall, every man within its footprint will be dead or disabled.

These are our recommendations:





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



"Lucius no wonder the soldiers in your unit, and the unit itself was the most highly decorated in the theater. You thought of everything. They followed your lead. I would never have thought of that."

"Margaret, send out a notice to all agents asking them if they are left-handed. Put urgent on it."

"I'm sorry general would you speak to my translator first. I don't understand normal English."

"General when are you two getting married?"

"I asked him the same thing several months ago Lucius. He still hasn't answered me."

"For a three time loser Lucius, you seem to be willing to put another man in jeopardy."

"If I have to suffer sir, why shouldn't someone else."

"Return to the map Lucius, tell me more."





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



As I rubbed my fingers on the inside of her labia, her hips started chasing me. I continued suckling on her nipple as my fingers dove into her birth canal. If you were deaf you could hear the huge intake of breath she took as she filled her lungs.

Her hips and my two fingers moved as one. I began a slow rotation, to the right and she moved her hips to the left. We were so in tune to one another; we were like two professional dancers who knew their music well.

Then I fooled her. I stopped. Her hips searched for me and I wasn't there. She keened in disappointment. As I felt her head reach up from the pillow, in perfect synchronization I bit her nipple, my thumb crushed her clitoris, and three fingers pushed deep inside her moving rapidly in a circle. My left arm pushed a pillow over her face as she screamed at the top of her lungs and my darling wife came mightily. Her body was stretched like the strings of a violin, but I was not ready to let her come down from this high.

I started playing with her G spot, sliding my fingernails over it time and time again.

"Oh God, Even, I'm not ready. It's been such a long time I need to rest. Let me be. Even don't, please, it feels so good, you cock sucking bastard..."

I moved, and took her right nipple into my mouth. The nipple was already distended, waiting for someone, like me, to pay attention to it. I didn't want to disappoint her.

My thumb was playing Ping-Pong with her clitoris, while Jennifer's head was keeping time in reverse. She is such a lovely sight when she is in the throes of passion. It was time to light the second stage, because she was beginning to regain her senses

I moved the covers down, and raised her skirt up above her navel. I began kissing her belly, as my left hand went from nipple to nipple, twisting, and torturing each in its turn. My right thumb descended from her clit, circled around her opening, tempting her to come after it.

When her hips rose off the bed to capture it, I forced it as deep into her as it would go, and wiggled it around. I heard her blowout a deep breath of air, as she collapsed her muscles around it, trying to keep it inside her. As she was concentrating on my thumb, I slipped two fingers up her rectum, and she didn't notice it. I was going to try for the third finger, but I didn't want to lose my right hand. It was time to light the second stage.

I took my mouth off her nipple, and moved down to the succulent flesh beneath it and began to nibble.

I pulled my thumb loose from her strangulating muscles and began moving it up and down inside her channel.

I began moving the two fingers that were in her ass. In and out they went, as rapidly, and deeply, as I could move my hand. Her head popped up off the pillow, and there was a quizzical look on her face.

She was about to say something when my head moved back to her nipple, and bit it.

Her mouth opened in pain.

My thumb pressed down hard on her clitoris, rotated it counterclockwise against her pubic bone, and finally I pulled the two fingers out of her ass, I showed them to her and shove them back in to the root.

No words came out of her mouth. She squirted all over the bed, and took a nap. The second stage ignited on time.

I decided to check on my wife, as I adjusted my position on the bed. I didn't have to ask her if she was okay, the smile told me everything I needed to know.

I still had one more project to complete and that was to put her into orbit. Considering the state of my current disrepair this was going to be a little tricky, because I did not want to injure myself while doing it. I made myself as flat as I could on the bed. I turned and moved across Jennifer's lower right side, trying not to disturb her reverie. Her little pearl was still distended, and that was my first target. I wiggled my tongue to loosen it up and remembered my alphabet. I moved my head between her thighs and thought, "Oh well here goes; the letter A." No movement from the top of my bed. Letter B. Still no movement. Letter C. Her hips moved. D. Another hip movement. By the time I get to G she should be awaken. E. There was a definite reaction. We should have gotten in eye flutter on that one too. F. Her voice returned, "Oh Even." Yep this should do it. G. She realized what I was doing, and screamed "EVEN!"

"Welcome back dear, did you enjoy your nap?"

"What do you think you're doing, I haven't been able to...?"

"Yes dear, I noticed. A little deforestation is in order when we get home."

"Deforestation hell, it's a goddamn jungle down there."

"Do you see me complaining?"

"No."

"Then lie back, and let me enjoy my meal."

"I will get even with you for this."

"I'm counting on it."

She was exhausted and it took me a long time; a long and pleasurable time, but I'm happy to say I knocked her socks off by the time I sent her into orbit.

After a nap Jennifer went into the bathroom, cleaned up, retrieved her underwear, and dressed. She opened the door to my room, and returned my bed to its normal condition.

She was sedately sitting in a chair reading, and I was resting, when Delicious and Newton walked into my room.

She took two steps, sniffed the air, and said, "You two are disgusting."

Newt looked up at her and said, "Why mommy, your room smells the same."

Delicious turned bright pink.

I asked my grandson what he invented this week.

"I was playing on the blue computer and I told my dad someone was trying to break through our firewalls. He went to our cryptology area, and they were able to stop them before the bad people broke through them."

"That was very important Newton. What we have on our computers is very secret. We are the only people who are supposed to know what's on our blue computers."

"My dad didn't tell me that. Do you want me to do something about it?"

"Do you know how to write computer programs?"

"Oh yes, grandma taught me how to do it Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. It was very hard at first, but she told me the tricks and made it easier for me."

"Newt let me tell you one thing about your grandmother you should know. She knows every trick and shortcut ever invented. Do you want to know why she knows so many?"

"Yes grandpa, grandma is very smart, but why does she know so many tricks?"

"She knows so many tricks because she played them all on me when I was young."

"Grandpa, grandma says she has one more waiting for you when you get there."

"I'm amazed."

"Why grandpa?"

"She only has one trick waiting for me. I thought after all this time she would have a truckload."

"Grandpa, grandma said that can be arranged."

"Delicious take him to our computer people tomorrow and see what he can cook up in the way of a software program to keep people out of our computer. Don't let him do what Patti Valentino's kids did please. We don't want a five-year-old starting the third world war."

"Okay dad, do you want to tell me how they did that?"

"All I will say is they started with a computer game, and they upgraded it. Now don't lie to me, and tell me what's going on at work."

"General Morgan stopped a group of men from coming onto the property. They were posing as men from OSHA. One of them had a grenade in his pocket. Everyone's on high alert now. No one gets near the property without being challenged. Our men are very good dad. General Morgan now has a second-in-command. His name is Colonel Lucius Canyon. He is smart, he is strong, and he is shorter than I am. I like the last part.

Supposedly they were bitter enemies in the Serbia/Croatia war. The general got the Colonel kicked out of the service. I don't know what the circumstances were back then, however they are getting along fine now. As I said dad, the Colonel is very smart.

"Circumstances change baby. Williams Zabo may be the reason. The Colonel could be a good friend of William's. It would be a good way to start a conversation."

"You are very sneaky dad."

"Sneaky, crazy, it's all the same thing. I'm going home in the morning."

"You are? I thought you had to go to a rehab center first."

"I'm bringing the rehab center to me. I'm tired of seeing my wife sleeping in a little bed a few feet away from me, when she could be sleeping a few inches away from me in a big bed. I'm stealing three nurses from this hospital, and I will know by the end of this afternoon if I am hiring three CNA's and a dietitian. The rest of my needs I will get when we get home. If I have to set up a hospital room I can do it in my den. I haven't seen my children in too long a time. I miss them, and I'm tired of you having to drive 340 miles to come and see me. I will be home tomorrow, and I'm going by helicopter."

Jennifer yelled, "You are not. I do not fly in helicopters. I will not fly in a helicopter. I hate helicopters."

"My dear, if you remember correctly, when I left your house in Fairbanks, it was by helicopter. I was leaning out the door waving to you. I got to the hospital quickly, and it helped save my friend Michael's life. I'm going home tomorrow by helicopter. It's already arranged. If you don't want to come with me, I suggest you leave two hours ahead of me, so you can greet me when the helicopter lands. For you it will be a three-hour journey, for me it will be one hour.

I will have the gentle hands of nurse Tammy Hopkins with me, possibly one more; so I will be fine."

"Doctor Even Luck, I'm beginning not to like you."

"You liked me a lot a few hours ago, when your bra and panties were in your bag."

"Even, your grandson is standing there, and I'm sure he's taking notes."

"I don't have to take notes grandma, I remember everything."

"Oh God, I'm doomed."

"Jen, it's not as bad as Holden walking into our bedroom, while I was searching for ants in your pants."

"If you say one more word Even, just one more word, you will be in this hospital for a year."

"May I quote you on a different subject?"

"Is it on a totally different subject?"

"I swear to you it is on a totally different subject."

"Alright go ahead; just know that your life is in my hands."

"You said I would be in this hospital for a year if I said another word. A few months ago you said you would never leave me again. If I am here for a year, guess who else is going to be here?"

"Grandma, you're going to miss my birthday."

"I would never do that to you Newton. I have to let your grandfather live. He told the truth, which he sometimes bends to his own advantage. This time he actually told a story as it actually happened. So I'm going to have to let him go home tomorrow. You are going be able to see him as often as you want, because you live across the street from us. Richard and Holden will be home, and you will be able to play with them again. Finally everything will return to the way things were before grandpa got sick. How does that sound to you?"

"It sounds like we're going to have fun again."

"We certainly are Newton; we certainly are."

"One thing is not settled Jen. Are you coming with me on the helicopter, or are you going home by car with our security people?"

"I'm going with security, and you are taking security with you. Don't argue with me, because you'll wind up where the doctor wanted you."

"I married a tough little broad."

"You did, when it comes to you and your health Doctor. I'm not ready to let you go."

"I'm not ready to let you go either, Jennifer. I'm not sure if I ever will be able to leave you. If I happen to learn the date, and time of my death, I'm going to shoot you first, because I couldn't bear the thought of leaving you behind."

"Isn't that a romantic gesture Delicious? He's going to die so he shoots me first."

"I guess if you have to go, you might as well go quickly."

"Is your whole family nuts?"

"Newton would you ask grandma if she's crazy please."

*****************

"Grandma said, "We are all crazy like fox's. If you grab us by our furry tail, we will bite your arm. If you grab us by the scruff of our necks, we will scratch you with our claws. If you leave us alone, we will leave you alone."

I laughed.

"Grandma wants to know what you laughing about grandpa."

"Ask your grandmother if she remembers where she got that quote."

"She said no grandpa."

"She may yell Newton, because she's not going to like this answer. Tell her she got it from Rod Laver."

Newton jumped high off the floor, and covered his ears.

"Grandpa, she yelled, and it wasn't a nice word."

"I'm sorry Newt, but I knew that was coming. She does not like Rod. They never got along while she was alive. I think they would get along now."

"Grandma said that nasty word again."

"Tell your grandmother you are only five years old, and she's not supposed to talk to you that way."

"Grandma says she's sorry. She has to go talk to someone about her language problem."

"Tell your grandmother the only way for her to clean up her language problem is for her to keep her mouth closed permanently."

Newt started jumping all over the hospital room.

I yelled, "Leave that child alone, Divine."

Newton stopped jumping and ran to his mother.

My sister popped into my head. "You are in so much trouble with me Even. When you get here, I'm going to ignore you."

"Would you have St. Paul write an epistle on that subject, and sign the document? If I get to heaven, I will sign the epistle beside your name. Then I will stare at you for eternity, or until you talk to me. It should take all of fifteen seconds, because you are incapable of keeping quiet."

"I'm not talking to you ever again big brother."

"What did you just say?"

"I said I'm not talking to you ever again."

"Our connection must be getting bad, because you're getting very garbled. I can't understand a word you're saying. Would you try that one more time please?"

"I said I'm not talking to you ever again Even. Did you hear me that time?"

"Why aren't you talking to me?"

"You are the most infuriating man I have ever known."

"I thought you said you weren't talking to me."

"You asked me why I wasn't talking to you."

"You've been telling me for the last minute, that you're not talking to me. I don't understand why you've been telling me you're not talking to me, when you are still talking to me."

"I'm going to beat the crap out of you when you get here."

"You're doing an awful lot of talking, for a person who is not talking to me. Go to your grandson and apologize for scaring him to death. He's cowering in his mother's arms. If you ever do that to him again, when I see you, I'm going to mow you down like a blade of grass."

"I'll talk to you when I see you."

"You told me you weren't talking to me."

"I'm not. Goodbye."

When she left my head I couldn't help but laugh. Jennifer was listening to my side of the conversation with my sister, and she joined me in my laughter.

"It sounded to me like you had her totally confused."

"Baby, it was the one thing I could always do to her. Otherwise, she was queen of the house. The things she could do to me were amazing. She put frogs in my bed, Snakes in my shoes, Ants in the pockets of my slacks, and Love notes from fictitious girls. You name it, she did it to me. The amazing thing was she was afraid of most of the things she put in my stuff. She was doing it to get my goat, and she knew she could do it, with these little distractions. I would yell at her from my room. I could hear her laughing hysterically, in hers.

I loved her so much; I would have done anything for her, anything at all."

The phone in my room rang. Jennifer picked it up and listened to the person at the other end. All I heard her say was, "Yes Doctor, I'll leave the check with the administrator tomorrow morning before we leave. My husband will be very pleased."

I smiled. "They're going to do the little girl on Tuesday aren't they?"

"The head of the cancer center would not turn down $5 million for two day delay for one of the patients. He thanked us very much for the additional donation."

I closed my eyes, and prayed to my God. "Please Lord take care of that little girl. Let her live a fruitful life in your divine grace. Amen."

***************

"Does she look like she's lost weight to you?"

"You've asked me that question every day for the last two months, Callum. What makes you think Junie has lost weight?"

"She just looks so frail in there."

"She's been in the beauty box for nine months Callum. Her breathing, heart rate, and temperature have all been normal. She has had several dreams of long endurance we monitored, and as far as we can tell she is doing wonderfully."

"That's the part I'm worrying about... 'As far as we can tell'...there are so many unknowns about Stasis. Even if Junie comes out of this test in perfect health, how can we be sure the next person will get the same result Patti?"

"We don't know Callum. We are taking a giant leap of faith here. We don't have seven years to do a double blind study. Using this equipment, with this type of test, you can't do a test of that nature. You have to put your subjects into the chambers and watch them twenty-four hours a day seven days a week for seven years, hoping nothing goes wrong. No facility is going to approve the utilization of that much space, for that many years, for one science project, regardless of how important it is to the future of space travel."

Laura came over the speaker.

"We're getting company mom. It looks official, government plates, and the sheriff's office. Get down to the basement quickly."

"Callum you know what to do. Just relax everything will be fine."

***************

Laura walked slowly to the front door giving her mother a chance to get into position. When she was ready she opened it.

"Hi Sam what's up?"

"These assholes, I'm sorry, these experts from the FDA think you are performing live human experiments in your home on the subject of stasis. They have a warrant to search the premises."

"I wish we were that far into our program. Our research is stuck at Wood Frogs. Let them come in and look around. We can show them how far we've gotten. Maybe they can show us where we are going wrong. We've been stuck at this point for nearly a year, and we are frustrated.

Ladies and gentlemen this floor contains the living areas of our home: bedrooms, bathrooms, kitchen, and library. If you want to look around, please feel free to do so. The science areas are underground. Tell me where you want to start and we will begin there?"

"Captain, if you would search this floor for anything unusual, we would like to see the science areas."

"Sam, Sabrina will make you anything you like."

"If you can keep them down there for an hour, I'll have her make me lunch."

"How does an hour and a half sound?"

"It sounds like a relaxing lunch to me."

"We'll see you later Sam."

"You will notice as we go downstairs the temperature rises instead of falls. That's because we have a Cray 4 computer here, and the heat it produces dries up all the moisture a normal basement contains. Our basement is sectioned into three separate areas. The computer area is for top-secret work and above. My mother does work for the federal government that has Code Name Restricted access. To get into that room you have to go through a bank vault door, and use a retina scanner. The center room is for classified research, like we are doing on stasis. The room on the left is where we build our models, or it can be changed into a playroom if we have children here and inclement weather outside. Where would you like to start?"

"We'd like to start in the playroom please."

"Follow me."

Laura led them into a huge 40Lx60Wx12H room filled with tools of every type. She stepped aside and let the ten members of the FDA inspect it.

"When you have children play in here, where do you store the tools?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



Laura hit a switch on the entrance wall, and panels on the Eastern wall opened revealing storage space behind it.

"Everything fits in there quite comfortably."

"Do any more of these walls open?"

"Yes, but they're just for toys."

"May we see the toys please?"

"You better step to the center of the room. The kids don't always put them away neatly."

Laura moved a second switch and you could hear the rumbling begin as soon as the doors began to part. The doors gave way and toys poured out onto the floor.

Doctor Aniston said, "I'm sorry about the mess."

"Is there anything else you want to see in this room?"

"Do anymore doors open?"

"No, those are the only walls that open. Do you want to check anything else in this room?"

"No, we can move on to the next room."

******************

Laura escorted them to the classified science room, and here was where they got into their first argument.

Anna was sitting at her computer, and immediately put her screensaver on.

"What are you thinking Laura? They can't see this information. This is all patentable material."

Laura turned to her group and said, "My sister is correct. I cannot let you see anything that's on our computers, even with your court order. This information has the potential of being patented. However, if you will sign a nondisclosure agreement, you can go through it from beginning to end."

"I will have to call Washington to get approval to sign that agreement."

"You can use any of our phones."

It may not have been legal, as a matter of law it was absolutely illegal, but they traced the call using the Cray 4, and taped the conversation.

The call did not go to Washington. It went to a switching system in southern New Jersey, which sent it to Newfoundland, Spain, Germany, South Africa, Australia, Indonesia, Hong Kong, Guam, Mexico City, and finally to San Diego. The system was running a little slow today, and it took 4.6 seconds for the call to be completed.

"This is Doctor Aniston. May I speak to someone in our legal department please?"

"Hello Doctor Aniston, this is Anthony Pete. Are they challenging the court order?"

"Yes they are, sir, on the basis that the material in the computer is patentable. They will give us access to everything if we will sign a nondisclosure agreement."

"Ask them if the NDA restricts the information to just your group or can it stay within our administration?"

Doctor Aniston asked Laura that question.

Laura said there was no way that their entire FDA was going to have access to this information. They would accept 'a need to know clause, restricted to the top one percent of the administration."

"You can tell Ms. Valentino that is acceptable to us Doctor Aniston."

"Thank you Mister Pete, we will continue our investigation."

"Miss Valentino, our legal department has given us permission to sign your NDA, with your additional clause. Do you want us to wait until you have your attorney draw up the agreement, or can we start our investigation, while he does it?"

Laura smiled. "Since you went through all that trouble to get approval to sign the document, I think I can trust you enough to let you begin your research. I do have a favor to ask you. When you get to the area where we are stuck, if you can find us a way around those damn 'Wood Frogs, I would really appreciate your help."

"I'll see what I can do."

"Ladies, and gentlemen, the computer is yours; have fun. Anna, load up the stasis program from day one. When you're finished, you can go upstairs and have lunch with Sam, or go out to the barn and help Callum with the horses."

Anna laughed. "Oh my, what a choice? I can have lunch with a very handsome married man, who has been known to frisk young women until they organism. Or I can go to the barn, and help a young, unmarried man, who looks like Adonis, and brush down horses until I organism spontaneously. What shall I do, what shall I do?"

Laura laughed at her sister. "You can do them both, if you hurry."

Anna was out of her chair and on her way upstairs, when she turned around and ran back.

Laura said, "I thought you'd be in the shower by now."

Anna hugged and kissed her sister. "I forgot to say thank you."

"Get out of here you nut."

***************

Patti called General Morgan.

"Dan, you were right again. They faked calling Washington to get permission to sign the NDA. The call bounced all around the world, trying to avoid detection, but my Cray was all over it. It went to the home of Jim Pierce, the President, and CEO of Advanced Algorithms. I took a voiceprint of the person speaking at the other end of the line, but I didn't have to, because I recognized his voice. It was William Silver; I have no doubt about it. That's where he's hiding."

"Great job Patti, give these people the real information, because they will be able to tell if it's faked. Help them through the process of everything you did to get to the point of those damn frogs, and your frustration afterwards. You did great on this Patti, keep it up."

"It's my father they are after Dan. I would move heaven and earth to protect him and his family."

"Are you willing to get your hands dirty?"

"Didn't I just do that a little while ago?"

"I'm talking about really dirty Patti. If you get caught, it could mean jail time."

"What do you want me to do Dan?"

"Is there any way for you to hook up into their computers and listen into their conversations?"

"Is that all Dan? I was able to do that since I was a teenager. I helped put three of the five heads of the families that ruled New York in jail when I was twenty-two by looking into their computers, and then destroying them."

"That was you! The FBI never let that information out. They knew you would be dead within days if they released your name."

"The only reason I wasn't dead was because the three Don's put the word out that I was not to be touched. I made a deal between them, the FBI, and the Department of Justice that took all the capitol crimes off the table, and kept the maximum jail time to twenty years. The three of them did not make it to their release dates. Two died of natural causes while in jail, and the other died of steel poisoning."

"I've never heard of steel poisoning."

"An unknown prisoner stuck a shiv in his heart."

"That will do it every time."

"Where do you want me to route these conversations to Dan?"

"I'll set up a monitoring station in the ready room. It will be manned twenty-four hours a day."

"I'll have Pierce's house online within two days."

"Make sure it can't be traced to you Patti. You're too short to wear horizontal stripes."

"I'm going to have Margaret pee in your coffee. You're beginning to sound like my husband."

"Margaret pees in my coffee already. I have very little interaction with your husband, because he never leaves his office. I don't know how he is not blind at the end of his day."

"Thank you Dan, at least I know he's being faithful to me."

"If you ever doubted your husband's love for you, you are a bigger horses' ass then 'George W.' was, for going to war against the wrong country after 9/11."

*****************

Cassie woke up at 1 PM, took care of her needs, and was getting ready to throw her robe on when she realized Callum was on duty taking care of Junie. Since there were only females in the house she decided to go into the kitchen and have breakfast in her nightshirt.

As usual for this time of day, the house was very quiet. She turned, walked into the kitchen, and headed directly to the refrigerator.

She took out the orange juice and placed it on the counter. Then she bent to see what else was available for breakfast. As she bent lower and lower, her nightshirt rose higher and higher towards her hips. When she reached into the bins at the bottom of the refrigerator to take out a piece of fruit, she heard a man say, "If you don't stop there, I'll have a heart attack."

Cassie screamed, stood straight up as a soldier at attention, and pulled her nightshirt down as far as it would go. She was the color of a Maine lobster as she turned to see who was behind her.

"We haven't met, but that was an interesting way to do it. My name is Sam Meisner; I'm the captain on the police force, and a friend of the family. You must be Cassie, and what they said about you is true. You are stunning, bent over at the waist, or standing straight as an oak tree."

"Why didn't you tell me you were here when I walked into the room?"

"I didn't want to startle you. You didn't seem to be quite awake, but I did not think I was going to get the show I just viewed. I should not have let it get that far, but I did enjoy it. My wife will beat the shit out of me when I tell her what I did, but that will not be half as bad as what Patti will do to me for upsetting her guest. Have you ever seen Patti when she is angry?"

"Only once, and that was with Robert."

"Robert doesn't count. Everyone has been angry with him since he was five years old, and refused to do anything."

"He has a job in Maryland."

"Robert is going to work for someone?"

"I heard Patti say to Stephano she doesn't care how much it costs, but they must pay whatever it is to keep Robert employed."

"That boy is something else. Would you like to put a robe on?"

"Why would I do that now, you've seen everything there is to see."

"If you're going to wear something that short around the house, you really should wear panties."

"There were not supposed to be any men in the house, and all women are built the same."

"I guess I should say thank you for the wonderful view."

"Please don't, if I blush like that again, I'm going to need a very cold shower."

"How do you think I feel Cassie? A part of my body is so rigid, I doubt I could stand up and walk straight."

"I'm sorry Sam; now I have to go take a shower. I'm dying here, and you are not doing any better. I'll see you in half an hour."

"Before you leave, we have visitors from the FDA downstairs. Anna just ran to her bedroom; talk to her so you know how to play it."

"Thanks Sam, I'll do that."

***********

Cassie knocked on the door, and Anna told her to come in.

Anna took one look at her and asked, "Are you having an allergic reaction to something; you are as red as a beet."

Cassie told her what happened in the kitchen, and Anna collapsed on the floor laughing.

"Cassie, the only thing that would have made that story funnier was if it would have been Callum sitting there. He would have fucked you where you stood, or he would have had a heart attack."

"That's not funny Anna. I wasn't thinking about Callum sitting there. I was wishing it was Christian."

Anna pulled Cassie down to the floor with her. She took her hands in hers, looked into those magnificent eyes, and asked, "Did we have a breakthrough today?"

"I don't even know Sam, and he made me hotter than a candle flame by just talking with me. Chris and I talked all the time, and I loved it. I haven't talked to him in eight months. Mom and dad will not give me his new phone numbers because he told them we had an argument and he did not wish to speak to me anymore. They won't tell me where he's living either.

He did this on purpose. If I want him, if I want him forever, he wants me to fight for him. He wants me to tell our parents I love him, and I want to be with him as his wife. I don't know if I'm strong enough to do it. So here I sit, safe and sound, in Glen Falls New York, happy and miserable at the same time."

"I wish I had your problem. At least I would know I'm desired. Only one man in college and graduate school came after me. The only reason he did was because he found out I was a virgin. He wanted to add my cherry to his list.

I don't think I'm hideous looking. I don't believe I'm standoffish, and I don't believe I have bad breath. All I know is men avoid me like the plague."

"New clothes might help."

"What's the matter with the clothes I wear?"

"What do you wear when you go shopping?"

"I wear one of my sweat outfits, or a long jogging suit."

"What do I wear when we go shopping?"

"You wear shorts and a T-shirt."

"Which one of us do you think the guys look at more?"

"That's a very sexist attitude Cassie."

"What do you think guys are looking for Anna: Bird food, or meat and potatoes? You and your sister have the fashion sense of bag ladies. If you want guys to notice you, you have to dress to be noticed. Let me take both of you shopping. It will change your lives for the better."

****************

91. Money

"Good morning Patricia, how is everything going at your end?"

"Everything is super dad. The people the former vice president sent to check the status of our stasis experiments checked everything from day one to yesterday. They even offered us some of their own thoughts on the process, which were bogus. They checked everywhere, including the attic, and the barn. When they saw Callum, I think the women wet their pants. He wasn't wearing a shirt, and he was sweating. Laura said he looked stunning, and Anna was drooling all over him.

Jemma, Patrick, and their agents were in the tree line, because they checked each of the houses on the property. When they left they were satisfied we were doing nothing in the way of live testing, because we were far from the point of resolving the issue.

Our friend, Sam Meisner, the policeman who is not a policeman all the time, was with them. He kept telling them they were wasting his time, and helped hurry them along.

We watched each of them like hawks. They didn't have a chance to plant anything, but we did a fingernail check of everything they were near, sat on, or touched. It came up clean."

"That's very good news Patti. Now it's time to bankrupt them. Not only do I want you to take every penny they have in their bank accounts, I want you to buy every available stock option they have. I'm going to call Celeste and Harold. I will have them start buying their stock also. I want to get controlling interest in the company, and once we do, we will fire the board of directors, break up the company, and sell it off to the highest bidders. I want those two assholes to suffer as the government puts them in jail, and they can't afford bail."

"Will it stop them from attacking our project in Temple?"

"I can't answer that either way Patti. They may have cash stored away that they can use to pay for an assault on the spacecraft. We will have our eyes and ears open either way."

"Did Dan tell you what he wants me to do?"

"Yes I am fully informed. Please don't get caught."

"I wouldn't want to be a ninety-six-year-old woman, with two bad hips, living in a nursing home in Plantation Florida, dad. She may be getting visitors during the middle of the night."

"Shame on you Patti, taking advantage of the elderly."

"I was going to blame it on the Kim Jong-il of North Korea, but I thought the vice president might recognize his name."

"I think your mother should've spanked you, at least someone would've given you a pain in the ass."

"Dad, remember, I know where your money is; be nice."

"People tried to find me for over twenty years and could not do it. You got onto a computer and found me in thirty minutes. How long do you think it would take you to find my money if I didn't tell you?"

"That's an interesting question dad, I never thought of it that way."

"Okay young woman, it's time for you to get to work bankrupting those two thieves, and buying up stock in Advanced Algorithms. You know how to do it, so get started. I love you Patricia, stay safe."

"I love you too dad. Don't you dare go anywhere without security surrounding you."

"I can't go to the bathroom without one of them coming with me."

"Do they watch?"

"Patricia that is very personal."

"Goodbye dad."

"Goodbye Patricia."

***************

"This is Doctor Bradley from Anderson Hospital can I speak to Doctor luck please."

"This is his wife Jennifer, is anything wrong Doctor?"

"No Mrs. Luck, I just have some information for him. You can listen in if you want to."

Jennifer gave me a handheld phone and told me it was Doctor Bradley.

I held my breath. "Good afternoon Doctor, how are things in Houston?"

"Doctor Luck, why did you ask us to have that young girl's operation moved to Tuesday instead of Thursday?"

"It was a premonition Doctor. I just knew it had to be Tuesday or she wouldn't make it."

"I didn't do the operation, but the neurosurgeon that removed the tumor from her brain said it was not a moment too soon. They placed the tumor into a jar to be brought to the lab to be studied, when it exploded. He said he had never seen anything like it in his thirty years of experience.

If it wasn't for your premonition, that young girl would be dead. As it stands now, she has a sixty percent chance of living. Thank you Doctor Luck from all of us here at the Cancer Center."

"Please don't thank me Doctor, you have saved two lives; hers, and mine. Keep fighting this dread disease, and one day you may find a cure for it."

****************

One hundred twenty agents were on hand at 2 AM, as the three Federal Express tractor-trailers arrived at the hanger. The boxes were numbered but otherwise unmarked. General Morgan signed each bill of lading as the numbers were called out by the agents, who unloaded them. They placed them on handcarts, and pulled them into the recesses of the hanger. 865 boxes were unloaded and placed in a predetermined order.

The preparations for war had begun.

********************

The landscapers came next. Following the design Colonel Canyon laid out for them, they planted lush bushes and plants starting fifty meters in front of, and twenty meters to each side of the hanger. The plants ran parallel to the hanger, 750 meters to where the berms would start.

At night, agents used machines to press the reinforcement bars down into the earth just below the top of each plant. It took them two days to do all of them before sunrise.

Then there was the 'Sprinkler System.' They rented a trench digger, and dug a hole six inches below ground level in front of the plants. Wires were run through the white pipe, into a twelve inch threaded risers spaced twelve feet apart, and into the sprinkler head. The top of the sprinkler head was unscrewed; the spring discarded, and the wires pulled up. A small microphone was attached to the wires, and slid up to the top of the nozzle of the sprinkler assembly. A piece of cotton was pushed up to keep the microphone in place. The dirt was placed back into the hole and returned to ground level. The microphones were standing fourteen inches above the ground, innocently looking like a normal sprinkler head.

At the end of the day, the entire perimeter of the hanger was wired for sound. Anyone trying to sneak up on the hanger and making a sound would be heard by the technician operating the control board in the hanger.

A water truck came by to water the new plants every third night.

*****************

General Morgan called an engineer he knew from his Desert Storm days. Charles Daniels was a colonel who helped design the breaching elements to destroy Saddam Hussein's impenetrable walls of sand. He was now playing with his grandchildren, and couldn't wait to get away from them.

He told his daughter he could be gone for as much as a year, because of this new job with his former general.

She sobbed at the thought of losing her babysitter.

When the three military men got together, it became like old home week. More war stories were being told then work was getting done.

It was Margaret that put an end to this. She brought in a kitchen timer and slammed it down on General Morgan's desk.

"Listen to me you three old warhorses. Your glory days are gone. You have to defend this place, the people in it, and the spacecraft. From today forward you have fifteen minutes each to talk about your past glories. After forty-five minutes I coming into this room, and I'm going to start cracking heads open if you're not working on a plan to keep this place moving forward. If you're not doing something to protect every person here, your ass is mine."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



Charlie laughed. "What did she say Dan?"

Margaret reached behind her back and pulled out a personally autographed model of a Ted Williams baseball bat in front of her.

"Do you understand me now Colonel Daniels?"

"Yes Margaret, fifteen minutes not one second longer. Is that Ted Williams real signature on there?"

"Yes it is. He stayed at my house many times, because he loved fishing in the lake behind it."

Dan said, "You never told me that Margaret."

"You are so busy talking no one else can get a word in edgewise."

"Margaret told me that many years ago."

"You told Lucius and you didn't tell me?"

"Lucius listens, you talk all the time."

"Maybe you shouldn't marry him Margaret."

Charlie said, "You two are getting married?"

"He's thinking about it."

"I am not thinking about it."

"So you decided to do it."

"Lucius keep your mouth shut."

"Can I wear a gray dress?"

"I don't care what color dress you wear, I'm not marrying you."

Charlie said, "I'm confused, are you or aren't you getting married?"

Margaret said, "As soon as possible."

Dan said, "Over my dead body."

"Don't you love the color his face gets when I get him riled up Lucius?"

"I don't think Crayola has that color."

Charlie asked, "Would somebody tell me what's going on?"

Lucius said, "I'm sorry Charlie, our fifteen minutes is up. We have to get to work."

******************

"Lucius, I can't make your tunnels until I know where the opposition force is going to be. Why don't we make places for them that are not too obvious, but not too perfect for their purposes?"

"You're the expert on this Charlie, how do we go about doing it. They've already done aerial photographs of this place. We can't do a major reconstruction without it being obvious."

"You've already done it Lucius. You put in landscaping. They have no idea what it took for you to do it. You may have run into logs or boulders that had to be moved in order to beautify the place for the grand entrance of the spacecraft. They may think we put everything off to the sides."

"As I said Charlie, you are the expert."

"I'll lay out a design, for you and then I'll show you where your tunnels will be. Making it will be easy as pie. Your men will have to crawl through it. I'll put a four-foot culvert in there and run it the whole way to the exit point. I'll put a nice twilight periscope on it, so they can look around before they exit. I'll have it open and close like a garage door just in case they need to make a fast exit."

"How long will it take to make Charlie?"

"It should take about three or four hours for each side."

"Is it all prefabricated?"

"If the excavator operator is on his game, it really is a piece of cake. While he's digging the hole the culvert is being put together. The last pieces are the uprights, and they take time.

You have to get your men from the hanger into the hole without being seen. A few trucks parked in those areas and a few guards walking around will do the trick.

Once we have the ends made the culvert goes in. While we are working on getting the uprights connected to the culvert, the bulldozer operator should be pushing the sand back into the hole and closing it up."

"How are you going to do the berms. How high are you going to be able to get them, without them looking fake?"

"You want them to look like stadium seating, and that's exactly what we're going to give them, stadium seating. It takes two or three days to put an aluminum grid together. They come prefabricated from the company. You put screw A into hole B, and it's together. I don't think they come twenty feet high, but we can find out if they do. When they get here, regardless of what size they are, we have companies start bringing us sand, and plenty of it. We erect a huge tent; ostensibly to keep our workers cool. Once we have the first aluminum structure completed we call in bulldozers and bury it in sand. We slope the back at an eight-degrees angle to make it look like it's holding up the rest of the sand. We carve out the front of the sand close enough to the grid, but not perfect. Then we move on to number two, and then number three.

Now comes the fun part, blocking the opposition force in on all sides. We'll use Tiger traps. They are not going to use tanks, or any other type of dual treaded vehicles. If they use any wheeled vehicles, it will be a Humvee or something of that nature.

A trench five feet wide will stop them. Most men will stop and try to walk around a trench that big, rather than try to jump over it with a pack on his back. All we have to do is make the traps five feet wide by five feet deep by eight feet long and cover them with heavy tarps. We will throw an inch of sand on them so they can't be seen until the first man or vehicle falls into it. We overlap three of them at each of the openings between the berms, and the opposition force is dead in their tracks. Those who try to climb the eight-degree slope leading to the top of the stadium seating will find the sand is so loose, their attempts are futile

Off to both sides of the stadium seating areas we hide three 50-caliber machine guns, and the opposition force becomes like the Mariana's Turkey shoot. The Japanese lost half their Navy that day.

I would be amazed if men of the opposition force didn't throw down their weapons, and surrender the first minute after they realized the trap they walked into. It's your perfect pincer movement Lucius."

"You're damn right it is. There's only one problem. The mortars, I know they're going to come in with mortars. We have to take those out, but they are going to be a bitch to find. Just one of those things could ruin our entire day."

"A mortar is only as good as its spotter Lucius. Without coordinates the mortar is useless."

"That's true, but what if the spotter is in an aircraft, or if they using a drone, I still say a two-man team should be sent out to for mortars."

Charlie asked, "Dan can we get our hands on some drones? I'm not talking about the military version; I'm talking about these new ones that the public is using. With a little American ingenuity we could fly it into a target and it could explode."

"Charlie don't you know it's against the law to alter a civilian aircraft and make it into a lethal weapon?"

"Yes sir, but that applies to other people, not me. I'm an engineer."

"Who told you that?"

"Norman did."

"You and General Schwarzkopf are on a first name basis?"

"Yes sir."

"How did that come about Charlie?"

"That will have to wait until tomorrow sir."

"Why?"

"My fifteen minutes is up."

"Charlie, I'm about to strangle you."

"Help me Margret."

"Tell him, because I want to know."

"Two birds and two stars were having an argument on how to get through the berms Saddam built to protect Kuwait. I was a lowly major listening to them, and I know they are full of shit.

Norman is listening to them argue. I got so disgusted I turned threw my pencil in the air and walked away. I got about ten feet when his booming voice said, "Major, what do you know that those idiots don't know."

I said, "General with all due respect to their rank, they have no idea how to move sand. I'm a desert boy, and if you want to move sand you don't blow it up, you blow it to the side. They're talking about putting rows of explosives next to each other and lighting it off. You might as well do that in water, because you going to get the same result. You have to form a Vee and blow the sand sideways to get a hole big enough to drive a tank through."

He didn't take my word for it, he said, "Prove it."

"Build me a berm sir."

It's amazing how fast something can be built when a four star general tells you to do it. In two hours I had a 150Wx100Dx50H sand berm I had to blow a trench wide enough for a tank to get through. I was given two boxes of explosives, and one assistant. Less than an hour later, I blew a hole through that sand wide enough to put two tanks abreast through."

Norman and I became best friends, and I got a Silver Oak leaf."

"I hate showoffs."

"Can we get civilian drones?"

"Look them up on Amazon and see if they carry them."

*****************

"Hello Dan, this is Even, and I am about to make your day."

"Even please tell me you're in the convoy on your way home."

"I am on my way home, and I have security with me, does that make you feel better?"

"I don't like it when you will avoid my questions. What are you up to Even?"

"I am in the helicopter on my way home. I'm going to make a slight detour on the way, and visit my baby. I want to see how far she's gotten in the last five months. Please don't shoot down my helicopter when it lands in front of the hanger."

"Even, Jennifer is going to kill you."

"I won't tell her, will you?"

"No, but one of the 200 people working on that spacecraft might."

"They won't know I'm not supposed to be there."

"Even, you are going to kill yourself if you come back to work too soon."

"I'm not going back to work Dan, I just want to see her. It's been much too long, and I am having withdrawal symptoms."

"Do you have a wheelchair with you?"

"No I don't."

"Two of my men will carry you everywhere. I don't want to hear an argument from you. We will put you in a chair, and walk you around."

"That's fine Dan; I can't walk that far anyhow. We should be landing in five minutes."

"You son of a bitch, thanks for all the warning."

The Life-Flight helicopter landed, disgorged its passengers, and was back in the air in five minutes. It had done its job, and was now on its way to help another sick or injured person.

There were a lot of curious people wondering who the helicopter dropped off at their facility, and when they saw me they started to cheer and applaud.

I must have had a smile a mile wide on my face, because I attempted to stand up and wave back at them.

Tammy Hopkins stood in front of me and said, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Standing up."

Tammy replied, "Nursing home."

"Yes ma'am."

This young woman could not intimidate a bird, but the look in her eye intimidated the hell out of me. She was not going to take any of my crap. Her job was to get me well, and that is what she was going to do along with her two cohorts.

"Doctor Luck, you have fifteen minutes before I have to give you your medication, make them count."

"Come with me Tammy, you will be the first civilian to see the inside of The Good Luck."

The agents strapped me in to the chair using bungee cords. I weighed 145 pounds and they carried me like I was a sack of potatoes. As I looked at the outside of the Good Luck, I could see the cameras. They were nearly flush against the exterior skin of the spacecraft. I marveled at Dycke Schneider's ingenuity, and that of his engineers. The skin of the spacecraft looked seamless. Unlike a baseball that has stitching, this was more like a steel ball bearing: it was perfectly round and uniform. It would change when we put the ears on it.

They carried me up the ramp directly to the second level. The cables were no longer strewn around the floor. They were all neatly bundled, marked, and locked along the walls in their flight positions. I couldn't believe what I missed in five months.

Then they took me up to the third level, and I was transported to the future. The people from Sony had done themselves proud. The massive screen curved along the front wall of the spacecraft. It did not look like individual screens; it looked like one individual display. It was so big I didn't guess its' actual size.

The Exascale computer consoles were installed, as well as all the propulsion and navigation controls. I turned and saw Jennifer's command seat, with its two control panels stowed away and covered by thick plastic. It was then that I realized there was no seat in this area for me. I was superfluous. I was just the builder. I got dizzy, and I began to feel faint.

I said, "Get me out of here please."

Tammy noticed the change in my appearance. She jabbed me in my left arm with a needle containing my medication. As the agents reached the bottom of the ramp, I was unconscious.

When I woke up, I wished I hadn't. She was glaring down at me, and I was sure she had the throwing knives in her hand.

"What the fuck were you thinking?"

"I just wanted to see her."

"You did, and look where it got you. Your blood pressure fell through the floor. Tammy almost rushed you to the hospital because she thought you were bleeding inside. Thanks to the emergency kits we have at the hanger, she was able to stabilize you, by give you intravenous fluids, and iced you down. You scared the shit out of the entire staff. You're not allowed to go back there unless I am with you. Is that clear Doctor Luck?"

"It is very clear Mrs. Luck. I believe I had a panic attack when I was on the third floor marveling at everything that was done. I looked at all the computer consoles, and in my mind I named everyone who would be sitting at them. Then I proudly looked at your chair, and the two control boards you would be master of.

Suddenly I realized I was no longer needed. I was superfluous. I was just the builder. I could no longer contribute. My work was done. Everything I had accomplished was in the hands of someone else. That's when it happened. That's when I told the agents to get me out of there, and I felt the needle enter my arm."

92. Visitation Rights

My children climbed all over me. Richard had tears in his eyes when he saw me. He believed everyone was lying to him about my being sick. He thought they were being kind, and preparing him for the shock of telling him I died. If he could've climbed inside me he would have. He lay down in my bed, held on to my arm, and would not leave me, not even for dinner.

I promised him I would be here just like I was before I got sick. I was not going anywhere. I wanted him to eat his dinner so he didn't get sick.

Reluctantly, he went to the kitchen, inhaled his dinner, and returned to me.

Holden was a different case entirely. "Dad, you owe me so many stories I lost count. When can we start reading again?"

"Are you busy now?"

"I was just going to play chess with nurse Janice."

"When did you learn to play chess?"

"I taught myself."

"That must've been very hard to do."

"No, not really, chess is just like math, and I love math."

"Since when do you love math?"

"I always loved math. You were never around to see me work on it. You were always doing your science or working on the spacecraft."

"I'm sorry Holden, it is my fault. I am so wrapped up in getting my work done I left you and Richard to fend for yourselves. That was totally unfair of me."

"That's all right dad, Gordon has been helping us now that he comes home at 6 o'clock."

"You are all very special to me. I can't wait to see how you can help our new world when you all grow up. We are going to need very smart people like you to make everything work. My three sons will be instrumental in making the decisions which will make everything work properly. I am very proud of you all."

"Will you still read to me?"

"Every time you ask me to, open your Kindle and we will read together just like the last time."

"I will tell nurse Janice, I'm not going to play chess with her tonight. I'm going to read with my dad."

"I don't think she will mind that at all my son. In fact I think she will be very pleased."

I heard Gordon run into the house. "Hi mom, bye mom, I'm going to see dad."

I heard Jennifer laugh as he charged towards my room. He hugged me very carefully. I was expecting a warm greeting but I didn't get it.

"Don't you ever do anything that stupid again! Everyone in the building knew about it. They were ready to go to the N.E.S.T. to help you. Mister Zabo had to put security at the doors to keep them in the building. He went on the speaker system and advised us we would be hurting the situation, not helping it. He would keep everyone informed of your condition. He said if you didn't die because of this stunt of yours, he would personally go there and kill you himself, because the doctors ordered you to stay away from work."

Dad, from the sound of his voice, I'm telling you he meant it. He was downright angry with you."

I heard the doorbell ring and a security agent opened the door. I heard her say, "Good evening Mister Zabo; he's in his room, third door on the left."

He said, "Tell the nurse to get some anesthetic, antiseptic, and bandages ready. I'm going to beat the shit out of that idiot."

I heard Jennifer say to him, "William please kill him. I couldn't stand another five months in the hospital with him. I'll tell the police he fell down the stairs to the basement."

"I would do it Jennifer if the spacecraft was finished. Unfortunately that husband of yours is needed for now. When you get him into space, have him walk the plank. He'll be the first man to walk into that void without a spacesuit on."

"William with my luck he will have invented something that would keep him alive."

I heard William laugh. "I want a piece of that patent. E-Mail it to me."

Jennifer laughed again. "William, you are too funny."

He wasn't funny when I saw his face. Gordon got out of the way instantly. He knew trouble when he saw it.

"I came down here as a favor to you so you could fight the cancer that was in your body. From all the reports we've heard, you have done so successfully. What is the first thing you do when you come home; you try to kill yourself by going back to work against your doctor's orders. If you do that again, I'm going home, but not before I take my money's worth out of your hide.

Even how could you think about going to see the spacecraft? It means too much to you. The memories you have of it are what sent you into a downward spiral that nearly kill you. Do you know what your death would have done to the emotions of the people who work on this project with and for you? You may have dealt them a blow they may never have recovered from. Your spaceship may never have gotten off the ground.

Eighteen months from now it will be completed. Twenty months from now, you and your crew can take off and leave planet Earth behind. Do you want to throw all that away? Do you want to give up eight years of your life because you can't wait that long?

Very powerful people want you to fail. NASA wants you to fail. The entire federal bureaucracy wants you to fail. They want to prove that no private enterprise spending less than a third of what they spend to send a man circling around this planet can send a spaceship on a trip to the stars.

Twenty private investors want to prove them wrong. 60 to 70 intrepid travelers want to prove them wrong. A spaceship designed by you, in a shape everybody says is wrong and can never penetrate Earth's atmosphere must be proven wrong.

Everything about this spacecraft is new and exciting. You promised us 500 patents, and we have already passed that point with eighteen months to go. You have made your investors wealthier than they were before this project started. Don't die on us Even. Be smart, live long enough to reach your dream of landing on another planet successfully and starting a new Earth."

"William how many times do I have to tell you that you are the smartest person I have ever known? Everything you say, and everything you do is correct. Your logic is flawless. Sometimes mine is flawed. I thought seeing her would help me get well, and all it did was drag me down. I will finish her but when the time is right, and not one minute before. I promised Jennifer, and now I'm promising you, I will not step foot onto either of our properties until I am completely healed. Jennifer will be at my side when I do that. She will be my permission slip to go back to work. I promise you this, my friend, I will not put my life in jeopardy ever again."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 19



"Your word is good enough for me Even, it always has been. Is there anything you need or want while you recuperate?"

"I want a two inch steak, baked potato, asparagus with hollandaise sauce, and a large cup of coffee. Of course I'm not allowed to have any of those things for a long time, but I can dream about them."

"I'll go you one better Even. I'll have a graphic artist make a poster of them, and you can hang it on the wall facing you."

"You are a dear friend William, I'll be salivating all day while they feed me liquids and baby food."

"What are friends for if they can torture you in your hour of need?"

"You are too kind William."

"I'll stop by on the weekend to see how you're doing."

"I look forward to it."

Five minutes after William left, the whirlwind that is my daughter blew in the front door. Jennifer was there to cool her off before she got to me.

"Did You Kill Him?"

"Why, did he do something wrong?"

"Are you kidding me, he nearly died today."

"That's right, why should I go to jail if he's going to do it himself."

"Mom, you're not being funny. You have to reel him in."

"Do you think three hours after the incident I haven't done that already?"

"Why are you doing this to me?"

"I don't want you to go into your father's room and upset him. His nurses have been all over him, I've been all over him, Williams Zabo has been all over him, and his young children have been all over him. None of them can do to him what you can do to him, because you are the child of his heart. You can tell him how upset you are with him, but don't cut his heart out. He has the best one you will ever find."

"Mom, I hate being scolded before I do anything wrong, but thank you because I feel like Gordon does. I wouldn't know what to do without him, and neither would Gray."

"Your dad is the glue that holds all of us together. Not just our family, but look at the friends he has that hold him so dearly. Look how many scientists called you to get information about him when he was lost in Alaska. He is not only loved by us but by the community he is a part of. He would be sorely missed."

"I think I'll go say hello, before I start to cry."

"If you cry, he will laugh at you, and then you'll get angry with him."

"I'll try to keep myself under control."

**********************

Did I ever make a mistake when I hired these nurses. They were like prison guards; they didn't let me get away with anything. Tammy had that look that kept me in place.

Janice was pretty as a picture, and as strong like an ox. I didn't dare do anything to upset her.

Hannah was the oldest one, and she was sneaky mean. She was fifty-eight, and could retire, but wanted to continue nursing as a way of giving back to the community. She took this job because she wanted to see the spacecraft up close and personal.

If I did anything to Hannah that got her pissed off at me, nothing happened immediately. I would forget about it; she wouldn't. Sometime during her shift she would be checking on me, or giving me medication, and an eight-inch hatpin would penetrate my covers and enter my leg. I would scream out in pain, and Hannah would say is, "Your lungs are sounding better," as she left the room.

It wasn't fair, every time I screamed, Jennifer, and the agents guarding me laughed. I was in pain, and they thought it was funny. I didn't think it was funny at all. I would get even in my own way after they got me well.

**********************

"Dad I split the $1.25 billion between five of your German accounts. Mister Silver and Mister Pierce have $1000 remaining in that account, just to keep it open."

"Where does it show the money went to Patricia?"

"It shows it went to the three trading companies that deal with them on a continuing basis as payments for goods and services. It's not my fault the money got lost in the transfer."

"Are you telling me that money fell into a black hole and can't be found?"

"I can find it, you can find it, but they can't find it. What a shame."

"How many days will they be in the dark about this?"

If they don't make any transactions, ten days, if they do, you will hear about an earthquake in Southern California caused by screaming."

"My source, at the Justice Department, tells me many of the crimes the former vice president committed have already passed the statute of limitations. He will be hard to prosecute."

"We can't let him go free dad. He will be a constant danger to all of us."

"I agree Patricia, but let's see how he reacts to being penniless, and we will go from there."

*****************

93. It's Déjà Vu, all over again! (Yogi Berra: N.Y. Yankees)

Gordon was walking up from the basement after working out when the front doorbell rang.

He yelled out, "I have it."

He opened the door and a tall, dark haired beauty was staring back at him. He didn't notice what she was wearing; he was focused on her face.

"My God you are beautiful."

She smiled at him, and blushed.

Payne Schneider moved Zoie aside, and asked Gordon, "What did you say to my daughter?"

"I said she was beautiful."

"No Gordon, I want to know exactly what you said to my daughter."

"I said, 'My God you are beautiful.'

Payne turned to her husband and asked, "Dycke, how much trouble do you think were in?"

"I think we should call Father Vincent; and see when he's available."

"You think it's going to be that bad."

"How many years has it been since you've heard those exact words?"

"It's been twenty-seven years since you said those words to me."

"Look at your daughter and look at Gordon. What do you see?"

"I seek two beautiful children."

"Do you know what I see; I see us twenty-seven years ago. Take her hand and don't let her go. Otherwise she'll have her legs around him before we leave."

"Isn't that what you did with me shortly after we met?"

"This is different, she's my daughter."

"You're wrong, she's our daughter, and if wasn't for Even we would be here alone."

"Don't get logical with me now; keep Zoie by your side."

"Can we go inside now?"

They walked into the house, but Gordon took things into his own hands.

"Your dad never mentioned he had such a beautiful daughter."

"If he ever talked about me he would refer to me as that bitch at home, or the neat freak, or some other term of endearment."

"What's the matter with being neat?"

"I was excessively neat, actually I was compulsively neat. Things had to be exactly where I wanted them or I would go out of my mind. I couldn't stand anyone being in my room and messing things up. I hated track marks on my carpet. I hated where the door touched my carpet and left its mark when it was opened and closed. I guess I hated a lot of things until the last few months."

"Would you like to come to my room and talk, or do you want to go down the basement and talk there?"

"We better go down to the basement. The first place my father will look for me if I'm missing is in your room. He will have a fit if I'm in there alone with you, even if we are just talking."

"What does he think you're going to be doing?"

"A short time ago my parents put me on birth control pills to help my mood swings. They have helped me a lot. Now I think my father believes he has given me a permission slip to go out and have sex. He doesn't understand that it takes more than being safe from having a baby than to have sex with someone. I don't know what it was like in his day, or what the mores were back then, but I am not going to have sex until I'm in love with someone, and I'm sure he's in love with me."

"Why are you smiling Gordon?"

"I'm having a conversation with a girl. This is the first time I've ever had a chance to talk to a girl my age, and we are talking about sex. I've dreamed about it, I've thought about it, but I have never had the opportunity to talk with a girl about it. It seems so natural. I've never met a girl my own age, or seen one until I met you."

"What about at school you must meet plenty of girls at school."

"I don't go to school. I tested out of high school when I was nine years old. I've been working on the spacecraft since then."

"What could you possibly be doing on the spacecraft?"

"I finished uploading the latest star charts, and when we take off, I will be doing the celestial navigation."

"Oh, you're one of those whiz kids."

"Yes, math and science come very easy to me. Doctor Luck adopted me. My sperm donor left my mom when he found out she was pregnant. My mom is awesome you will like her."

"Do they pay you for working on the spacecraft; the child labor laws say they are supposed to pay you."

"Yes, my dad pays me, but it's not going to do me any good. What am I going to do with money when I leave this planet?"

"He's probably not paying you that much anyhow, so leave it to a charity."

"I've been working on this project for seven years. My dad has been paying me $500,000 a year since then. I don't know how much is left in the bank after taxes, because Rod takes care of that for me. If you have a particular charity in mind, I can tell Rod who to give it to when I leave."

"You get $500,000 a year?"

"Yes, I get paid just like most of the senior scientists."

"You are considered a senior scientist?"

"I have several patents to my name and I was interviewed on television last year because of an invention I made."

"That was you? You were the talk of our school. You are the boy wonder scientist who made it possible to use nuclear fusion commercially."

"Yes, that's me."

"Then why are you leaving the earth to go to someplace nobody knows if you can survive on?"

"That is the question isn't it. Why do people go to far off places to find new things? Why did Marco Polo go to China? Why did Columbus sail to the West? Why did Magellan round the tip of South America and sail into the Pacific Ocean? Why does anyone do anything before someone else?

The answer is very simple, someone has to go first. My father and my sister had a dream. We talked about it, and found twenty investors that believed it was possible. Our spacecraft is being built in a hanger 10.2 miles away from here. If you'd like to see it I'll get cleaned up and I'll have my agents take us over there."

"I would like to see it."

"I'll be ready to go fifteen minutes."

Gordon popped up from the mats and extended his hand to help Zoie up. She took it and a little charge of electricity passed between them. They looked at each other and smiled.

Gordon said, "That's a first for me."

Zoie grinned, "For me too."

"I liked it, very much."

"I think I like you. You are different than every other boy I've ever met."

"Why do you say that? As beautiful as you are, they must all flock around you."

"Yes they do, but none of them look at me like you do. Close your eyes, I bet you can't tell me what I'm wearing."

"I don't have to close my eyes, because you're right. I don't know what you're wearing. Your face is so beautiful I never took my eyes off it.

My friend, my agent, and my trainer Marty and I ran to work this week. It's more than ten miles. The first day she told me to visualize a girl wearing a bikini running in front of me. I couldn't visualize it. I never saw a girl my age, no less one wearing a bikini.

My sister is beautiful, but she is twenty-five. She is also a genius; she developed the engines for our spacecraft. She is the youngest woman I work with on the spacecraft. It would be inappropriate of me to visualize her rear end in a bikini. Let me get changed so we can see the spacecraft."

Gordon took the quickest shower in his life, ran into his room half-naked, changed into casual clothes, and ran to meet Zoie. She was standing next to her mother, and she didn't look happy.

"Young man, where do you think you are taking my daughter?"

"I am taking her to see the spacecraft."

"She is not leaving this house."

"Marty would you come here for a second."

"Yes Gordon, how can I help you?"

"Would you please tell Mrs. Schneider that you are accompanying Zoie and me to the spacecraft to look around."

Payne looked at the giant wall that is Marty, and stuttered. "Would you please have them back in two hours?"

"It will not be a problem Mrs. Schneider. There will be four of us protecting them."

"Thank you very much. Zoie please don't fall and break your neck."

"Gordon will be holding my hand mother. I'm sure he will keep me from falling."

Payne wanted to say something so desperately, but Marty was standing behind them, smiling at her. "Have a good time children. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"I remember the stories you told me about you and dad mother. I won't go that far."

Payne turned bright red, and retreated to find her husband.

"Let's get out of here before your father hears where leaving."

As they entered the SUVs Marty said, "That was a smooth move Gordon. I'm proud of you."

Zoie said, "Hello Marty, when Gordon mentioned your name, I thought you were a man."

"Most people do little one, and most people live to regret it."

"Let's go people were on the move."

By the time Dycke got to the front door two black SUVs rolling away from the house.

"Payne, how could you let her go with him?"

"You didn't meet Marty."

Jennifer laughed. Dycke didn't.

"Jen, she just turned into a normal human being. I don't want her getting into trouble."

"Dycke do you see this wall; that is Marty. Zoie has as much chance of getting into trouble as you do."

Payne said, "He's not taking me out of school on a Tuesday morning Mister Schneider."

"He better not be, or that young man and I are going to have a long talk."

Jen said, "I hope you're up to date on your martial arts; otherwise that young man is going to kick your ass. Marty has been training him for the last year, and some of our agents are having problems beating him."

"I'm getting too old for some of that shit. How old is he now?"

"He will be sixteen on the thirtieth of this month."

"What is the legal age for getting married in Texas?"

"I think it's eleven; why do you ask?"

"When Gordon saw Zoie for the first time, he said the exact words I said to Payne when I first saw her twenty-seven years ago. If that's not a bad omen, I don't know what is."

Payne hit him. "Why is it a bad omen? Look what happened to us?"

"Yes, look what happened to us. Your mother freaked out and nearly tore us apart. If it wasn't for our fathers, you and I would never have gotten married."

"It all worked out in the end. Everyone turned out happy."

"Everyone but Steve; I pay him more money than God, and Cynthia still beats the shit out of him."

"She's only making him pay for his past indiscretions. I believe when he's ninety she will start treating him nice."

"I still don't understand how a woman five foot nothing can beat up a man that is five foot eleven."

"He loves her, and he would do anything in this world for her."

"I love you, but if you beat me up like she beats him up, you would be hanging from the ceiling upside down."

"Yes I would, but you would be feasting on my pussy at the same time."

"Why didn't I think of that before, it sounds like fun."

*****************

"Good afternoon Marty, what's up?"

"Is there anyone in the spacecraft?"

"Nope, it's Sunday, everyone is at home resting."

"Gordon set your watch. You have one hour and fifteen minutes until you exit the spacecraft. One hour and sixteen minutes and you go into the ice bath headfirst."

"Thanks Marty; come with me Zoie for a trip into the twenty-second century."

They held hands as they walked up the ramp. He began explaining everything to her: the millions of pounds of water that would protect them from the radiation of space, between the first and second wall, the hundreds of millions of bearings made by her father's company' which would spin at a constant speed of three point two degrees per second to give the third level artificial gravity so no one would go floating around.

When they reached the third level, and he started to explain the computers to Zoie she begged him to stop.

"Gordon, there is only so much information a normal human being can take in at one time. My mind has just reached overload. Can we do something normal for a little while?"

"I'm sorry Zoie, all of this comes so easy to me, I forgot about you. What would you like to do?"

"I'd like to do something I've never done before."

"What is that?"

"I'd like to be kissed by a boy."

"I would love to kiss you, but I don't want you to be disappointed in me. So far the only women I have ever kissed are my mother and my sister. You will be the first girl my age; I've ever touched or kissed."

She put her hands on his shoulders. He put his hands on her hips. They drew each other closer. As they looked into each other's eyes their heads got closer, and their lips touched. They did not back off. Zoie and Gordon closed their eyes and pressed their lips tighter together. After a moment they began to move apart, and a little spark of electricity passed between them, again.

Gordon chuckled. Zoie was confused. She said," I thought it was amazing. Why are you laughing?"

He pulled her back to him and said, "I thought it was much more than amazing. I don't ever want to do that with anyone else for the rest of my life. The reason I was laughing is if we keep setting off electric sparks every time we kiss, or we touch, we better start wearing rubber soul shoes. Otherwise we're going to start a fire."

Zoe smiled. "Let's take off our shoes and see if we spark in our bare feet."

In their bare feet they kissed again. It was more passionate than the first time, and when their lips parted the spark exploded more brightly.

They were still smiling and holding each other, when a voice said, "Fuck, the ship is supposed to be empty today."

Gordon said, "Who the hell you?"

"Don't worry boy, you'll never live to find out."

Zoie grabbed Gordon's arm in fright.

"Zoie, behind the computers is a radio. Push the switch, and tell Marty were on the third floor, and we need help. Move now."

"Help won't come in time for either of you boy. You will both be dead, and I will be gone."

The man charged. Gordon took up his position planting his right foot firmly on the ground. The man was taller, broader at the shoulder, and stronger looking than he was. He knew he had to get it right the first time, or Zoie was in trouble.

The man hit him in the center of his chest. Gordon's body swung like a gate. He pulled the man's left arm as he passed him, moved it behind his back, and pressed it up towards his head. He swung his right foot, kicking the man's leg out, while forcing his head towards the floor. It hit with a loud thud.

Using all his strength Gordon hit the man between his neck and shoulder, and it was over. The man slumped to the floor, unconscious.

Gordon looked at Zoie and asked if she had contacted Marty?

"Yes, she is on her way."

Marty and several other agents were there within seconds. She surveyed the scene and looked at her protégé.

"Why the heck did you call me; you have everything under control?"

"I had a feeling you might like to talk to this gentleman. He's not one of ours. He was on the ship when he wasn't supposed to be. He threatened Zoie and me with death, which means he was up to no good. We're going to have to check everything to find out what he did, unless of course you can convince him using other methods."

"I'll call Dan and see what he wants me to do with this person. Can I ask you a question?"

"Have I ever said no to you?"

"Were you two in the process of getting dressed, or getting undressed. Your shoes are on the floor."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 20



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

***** 

94. Can I Go To The Beach? 

"Can I go to the beach with Zoie dad?" 

"It's almost 200 miles to the beach Gordon. Why don't you use the pool at their hotel?" 

"They're leaving in the morning dad, and I'd like to spend some time with her. It will only take us two hours and thirty-five minutes to get there." 

"Okay son, you have that grin on your face; when should I expect the other shoe to fall?" 

"Zoie asked me if I could come to Charleston with them for a little while. It is only two and one half hours away by airplane, but it 1655 miles." 

"You are turning into me Gordon. You are becoming very sneaky." 

"Thanks dad, you with the second person that said that to me in two days." 

"Let me guess, Rod was the first to tell you that, wasn't he?" 

"How did you know?" 

"You talked him into paying for the diamond ring, without calling me first." 

"Should I consider it a major victory dad?" 

"You should not consider it a major victory, but a victory nonetheless. You have my permission to go for two weeks or more if you want. You haven't had a vacation from work for several years, and you deserve to have some fun. You will live by the rules of the Schneider household. Whatever the Schneider's say to you, it will be as if I said it to you." 

"Do I have any say in this matter?" 

"Of course you do dear; but you're going to say yes. You want your son to be happy just as much as I do." 

"Why couldn't he have your genes instead of mine?" 

"He is smarter than I am, and he has the good looks of his mother. Who could possibly ask for more?" 

"Would you like to see my son get angry with me?" 

"I would hope not, but I guess you're going to do it anyhow." 

"Gordon going on vacation requires one thing: "SHOPPING!" 

"Oh God no, why mom, I have everything I need." 

"When was the last time you wore a bathing suit?" 

"I don't remember." 

"I do, it was six years ago. Do you think you're going to fit into that one now?" 

"Dad can I borrow one of your bathing suits?" 

"I don't have a bathing suit Gordon. I don't know how to swim." 

"You're kidding me dad. There's something you don't know how to do?" 

"I never had time. That's not true; I never made time for fun activities. I was always working on my science projects. That's what made me happiest. I didn't have a family, so science was my family. The only time I took off was on Sundays in the winter, when I would use my snowmobile for recreation. I loved riding that thing, and I was very good at it. I don't want you to be like me, I want you to have some fun in your life." 

"Dad, I'm going to have so much fun in my life, all the people on this planet are going to be jealous. Who else is going to be able to say they left Earth, and found a new life on another planet?" 

"They will be a maximum of seventy other people able to say it. They won't be presidents, or dictators. They will be everyday ordinary citizens taking the trip of a lifetime." 

"Shopping!" 

"Dad, help me please, she's going to buy me a plaid bathing suit; I know it." 

"I hear they're very fashionable this year Even." 

"Son, just do it. You don't have to look at them, other people do. You can tell them that they are the height of fashion in Texas. When you get back home you can burn them." 

"He's keeping those bathing suits if he wants to see Zoie again." 

"The dictator of this house has spoken. The men of this household are subservient to her. We bow before her will. Get used to it my boy, one day that will be Zoie talking to you." 

"No she won't. I will have a leash around her neck; she will not have one around mine." 

I looked at Jennifer, as she looked at me; then we both laughed. 

"Isn't there a man alive who controls his own household?" 

Jennifer and I said, "No." 

"Why?" 

"It's not worth the arguing that will go on between the man and the woman son. You give her the keys to the kingdom, and she leaves you alone eighty percent of the time." 

"Is that true Mom?" 

"It's more than true with a man like your father. He's very malleable and easy to train." 

"What your mother means son is I leave for work before she gets up in the morning. I get home late at night. I eat dinner, we talk for an hour, and I take her to bed. I satisfy her every need, and we fall asleep. I wake up early the next day and repeat the procedure. It makes her life very satisfying, and mine very easy." 

"Even Luck, when you get your strength back, I'm going to kick the shit out of you." 

"You shouldn't be using such terrible language in front of an impressionable teenager. Don't you have to take him shopping?" 

Jennifer's demeanor changed, and a big smile returned to her face. She turned to Gordon and said, "We leave in two minutes." 

He remembered our rules from his youth. He walked towards the doorway of my bedroom, and asked the explosive question. 

"Mom is that a man's two minutes, or a woman's two minutes?" With that said, he ran out of my room, with his mother close at his heels. I heard his door slam closed and lock. 

"I'll get you for that young man. Your bathing suits are going to be so gaudy everyone will laugh at you." 

"They have stores in Charleston mom." 

"You're turning into your father." 

"That's the third time I've been told that in two days mom, it must be true." 

"Even Luck, I'm beginning not to like you." 

"I thought not liking me began a long time ago." 

"Every time I get laid it starts over." 

"Then you have a choice, take Gordon shopping, or come in here and close the door." 

Gordon yelled, "Close the door mom!" 

"Keep out of this young man, or I won't let you go." 

"It's too late, I just told Zoie I'm going with her, and were sleeping in the same bed." 

"You will do no such thing." 

"How old were you when you became sexually active mom?" 

"That's none of your business?" 

"Would you like me to say it out loud mother?" 

"If you do I will staple your knees to the floor." 

"I guess dad showed you which way was up and which way was down on that new stapler of yours." 

"You are a dead man Even. You can't keep your mouth shut for a minute." 

"I just thought it was a funny story dear." 

"I'm sure it was hilarious, when you told my son about it." 

"I didn't tell him. I told Dycke, and everyone else in the room accidentally overheard." 

"How many other people were there in the room?" 

"Let me see, there was Delicious, Gordon, Gray, Newton, Payne, Zoie, Janice, Monty..." 

"That's it, there is going to be a mix-up in your medicines tonight, and you are going to die. Start saying your prayers, I've given up on you being a normal human being." 

"You've known from the very beginning I was not normal. Who else would walk forty miles, from the site of an airplane crash, through a forest, just to say hello." 

"You never said hello, you just said my name." 

"At least I remembered who you were. You looked at me and said can I help you. Couldn't you tell by the look of us that we were half dead, and needed help?" 

"Don't you start with me Even Luck. It's not every day someone marches up to your door in the middle of the wilderness, looking like last week's lunch, and says your name." 

"If the man is half frozen, looks like last week's lunch, and says your name, don't you think he might know you?" 

"That's it Even you're dead." She stepped into our room and slammed the door closed. 

Gordon opened his door, walked up to ours and yelled, "Way to go dad!" 

Jennifer yelled, "You're still going shopping with me." 

"Dad keep mom happy, I'm going shopping with Monty." 

"Go ahead son, I'll keep her busy." 

"You will not... Even stop...You are not going shopping with...Even keep your hands off... Don't you dare go... I'm going to kill... Don't leave this...Even that's cheat...If you buy a bath...Oh Even, you bastard." 

"You can stop listening at your parents door Gordon. We're ready to go." 

"How did you know my dad was going to win Monty?" 

"Years and years of experience Gordon. Sometimes a woman wants to win, and sometimes she wants to lose. Today your mother wanted to lose." 

"She didn't sound like she wanted to lose." 

"Gordon how many senses do you have?" 

"Five Monty: sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell." 

"Your mother was fighting off your father with sound, but her body was giving off other signs that said she wanted to lose. All the women here knew it; all the men were oblivious to it. Janice stopped putting your father's medicine together and put them back into the refrigerator. Janet and I put our kits together knowing we were leaving. Eugene, Jack, Frank, and Harold just sat there wondering what duty we were preparing for. 

There is something called a sixth sense. It is a hyper-awareness of everything that goes on around you. Sensing your mother's ambivalence is part of it. If I asked you to remember Zoie's perfume, the aroma of it would be in your mind even though she was not in the room. You would see her face as clearly, as if she was standing in front of you. That is also part of the sixth sense. You must train your mind to remember all the important things that go on around you, so in the future you can recall them exactly." 

"Let's go shopping, we have about an hour to get to the store and back, with at least three bathing suits, and tops before your mother realizes you weren't kidding." 

"I have an awful lot to learn." 

"You'll be sixteen soon, and you still have a long time to learn it all." 

*************** 

95. Vanished 

The money is gone the bank just verified it. It was sent to the corporations we own. They acknowledged receipt of the money, but it is not on their books. Since the corporations are not banks, the bank says it is not their problem. Where the fuck did the money go, and who authorized the transfer?" 

"Does anyone else have access to your codes?" 

"No one does, not even you William. You would have to go to the vault in Montréal to get access to them." 

"How do you know your access codes?" 

"I keep them on a card like the president carries for access to the 'Football.' Only I know what line and what sequence of numbers to use." 

"That's as secure as you can get these days. How did someone break your codes and transfer the money. It had to be an inside job at the bank. Someone had access to their computer. Jim, check with the bank and see if anyone else has complained that their account was tampered with." 

"I'll get right on it William." 

"Before you go, would you set up the secure computer for me?" 

"I'll set it up by satellite for you; Peru correct?" 

"Of course it is. I want to talk to that officious bastard I put in office." 

************* 

Opening Skype on the computer, he waited for the other end to open. 

In Spanish, a language he detested, he heard, "President Toledo's office, how may I help you?" 

"This is vice president William Silver; tell Alejandro I want to speak with him now." 

"I'm sorry sir he's in a meeting, when can he call you back?" 

"Tell your president who is calling, and I need one minute of his time; NOW." 

"Yes Mister Silver, I'll tell him." 

A moment later, the president of Peru was on the line. 

"What do you want William I am busy." 

"Is she a blonde, brunette, or redhead?" 

"Twins." 

"I see they are serving the state well." 

"Yes they are serving the state admirably. What can I do for you?" 

"I need $40 million within two months. Someone robbed my bank of over $1 billion, and I intend to get even. Don't bother saying no to me. Of the 8 million votes you got in the last election, I delivered 3 million of them for you. Send me the money by diplomatic courier, in cash, and no one can know about it." 

"That's an awful lot of cash William, I don't know if I can get that much money." 

"Tell one of your cartel friends to give you the money, or the Army will start making things hot for them. The Americans will see that you are doing great things down there to cut off the drug supply. They will pour money into Peru to help you. You can pay the cartel back, or keep the money for yourself." 

"You were always a pragmatic thinker William. I will contact you when the money is on its way." 

"Enjoy your twins Alejandro." 

************* 

"General, we have an intercept." He handed the hard copy to General Morgan. 

"That son of a bitch doesn't give up, does he? Get a copy of this to Mister Zabo immediately. I'll call him and give him a heads up." 

After a quick phone call to Zabo, General Morgan called out to his secretary, "Margaret could you have your translator get Lucius on the line for me?" 

"I'm sorry Dan, my translator is sick today. All outgoing calls are canceled until further notice, or until you marry me. I bought the gray dress." 

"Margaret it's not going to happen." 

"You are already old. Do you want to be lonely as you become decrepit?" 

"Considering the alternative; yes." 

"I can see your armor is cracking, it took you a long time to say that." 

"Get me Lucius on the phone." 

"I hope he understands me." 

"He is one of the few people born outside of the Northeastern part of this country that does." 

************* 

In the back of a rusting freight container, Lucius answered his cell phone. 

"Good morning sweetheart, what does he want me to do now?" 

"He still won't marry me, but I believe I'm wearing him down. He didn't yell when I asked him this morning. He wants to talk to you." 

"He will yell in a moment, keep your ear away from the phone." 

"Hello Lucius; how are things there?" 

"Congratulations general, Margaret just told me. Have you set a date yet?" 

"God damn you Margaret, we are not getting married." 

"Thank you Lucius, I feel better now." 

"Anytime Margaret, it's better than him yelling at me." 

"You two cooked this up? You're both on my shit list." 

"Do you want to know what our friend had to say, or do you want to read the written report?" 

"I don't want a written report Lucius. Honestly, I don't want to know how you got the information. I remember your tactics, and although they were very effective, they went far beyond the restrictions of the Geneva Conventions." 

"What about our enemies, sir? Do they play by the same rules we have to play by? We know damn well they don't. They catch us doing it and it's the headline news. They do it, and our newspapers barely cover it. It's expected of them, because they are considered barbarians, sub-humans who pray to our societies weaknesses. We are a civilized society, we are held to a higher standard than they are. I won't play their game sir. They are killing our men, and their own people. I will do everything in my power to stop that from happening." 

"Let's not go there again, Lucius. Tell me who this idiot is, and what has to happen to him." 

"He's former CIA, working for Rockwell. He wanted manuals and pictures of our engines, plus anything else he could take out of the spacecraft with him. He was on his way to the flight deck to remove computer chips, when he ran into the two kids. He couldn't risk being caught, and identified. He was going to kill them both, and hide between the walls, until the full security sweep of the inside of the spacecraft was completed. His identification tags were perfect replicas of ours. He was next to one of our people in a bar, and took a close-up of his ID. He used a graphic design computer, and was able to make a perfect duplicate. We are going to have to find a way to keep that from happening a second time. A barcode scanner on each identification tag would identify each worker by name, and where that person worked on the spacecraft." 

"What do we do with him Lucius?" 

"We let him go sir. I burned his clothes, checked his body for microdots, and flushed his system three times. If he swallowed anything, it came out of that end. 

He and I had a heated heart-to-heart over what he saw and understood about the engines. Although he is a very smart man, he is no physicist. When he returns to Rockwell, he won't be able to tell them anything specific about the engines. What he does know will be useless to them." 

"That's great Lucius, I'm glad no harm will have to come to him. It makes me feel better." 

"I knew you would sir. I took extra care in explaining that to him. I advised him of my methods, which would have been harsher on his body. I told him I wanted to do it your way so he could go back to work. After that, he was quite forthcoming. I'll be driving him to the train station as soon as I get him cleaned up." 

"Thanks again Lucius, you did great work." 

************** 

Lucius looked at the dead body on the floor in front of him. "My general says thank you for the information you gave us. I wish you would've done it his way, but you had to be an obstinate son of a bitch. I thought by the time you lost your fourth finger, you would've known I wasn't kidding around. 

$5 million was not worth your life, especially now that you can't spend it. I am going to kill the stupid son of a bitch who offered it to you. He is the one that belongs on the floor not you. 

I have to remove your head now. With no head or hands, the police cannot identify you if they ever find your body. I truly am sorry I have to do this to you. You served our country well, and deserve a more honorable burial than I am going to give you." 

****************** 

"Really, these are bathing suits? They look more like running shorts." 

"Look at the manikins; apparently that's what they're wearing nowadays. Pick out any three or four that you like, and try them on. You're definitely not a small, even though you are very thin. Try a medium first, and if it doesn't fit, yell out and I'll bring you a large. Remember, we are in the teen department. Sizes are cut smaller here than they are in the adult department." 

"I hate shopping." 

"That's why women love shopping; they get to torment their husbands." 

"They are too small Monty." 

"Stay in there, I'll bring you a large." 

"This is better, but it's grabbing me in the wrong place." 

"Get dressed, were going to the men's department." 

"All the training you've been doing has bulked up your thighs. That's why the material is pulling across your abdomen. Try on a small, and take a medium with you just in case you need it." 

Gordon opened the dressing room and asked Monty what she thought. 

She smiled at her young protégé. "You'll do, you'll do just fine." 

She wasn't talking so much about his swimsuit, as much as she was talking about the development of his body. His arms had definition, his chest was expanding, his hips were narrow, and his legs looked powerful. Any young boy would be proud to have a body like his. 

"We will take two more bathing suits in different colors; get you three tops, and a pair of flip-flops. That will be all you need for the beach." 

"Should I bring my own towels?" 

"Only if you want to; but I'm sure they have plenty of them." 

"I know I don't say this enough, but thank you Monty, thank you for everything." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 20



"I get paid to take care of you." 

"You and I both know you do more than take care of me. Have you decided where you going on vacation?" 

"Yes, I'm going home. I have a ranch in Montana with cattle and buffalo. My mother and father live there and watch over the place for me, while I am working. It is beautiful country, and I get up there as often as I can." 

"It sounds wonderful. Say hello to your parents for me." 

"I will. Enjoy yourself with your new Miss." 

"You do realize you were right again. You said it would happen soon, and it did. I didn't realize I would fall in love the first time I saw a girl my own age. I don't think Zoie did either. She is so beautiful." 

"You will always see her the way you saw her that first moment. In your eyes she will never change." 

"I couldn't ask for anything more in life than that Monty. Her face is hypnotizing." 

"I could tell by the way you looked at her that you were meant for each other." 

"I think we should pay for these things and get back home. I don't know how long my father can keep my mother busy in his weakened condition." 

"Janice may have to interrupt them. He is overdue for his medication." 

"My mother will not be happy." 

"Your mother will not be happy if your father has a relapse." 

"Someone told me love is a double-edged sword." 

"Love is also deaf, dumb, and blind. You won't listen to your friends if they tell you the woman you love is the worst thing in the world for you. You will speak no evil of her, and the man or woman could be as ugly as a hog, and you will still think that person is the most beautiful person on the planet, because you are in love." 

"I guess if I could come up with a product, and patent it, I would be a very wealthy man." 

"You would be wealthier than Croesus. You would stop all wars, and cause the greatest famine known to man. No one would want to work. They would want to make love all day and all night long. More children would be born than the planet could sustain. As you said, 'Love is a double-edged sword." 

"Oh well, there goes another great idea shot down the drain." 

"It's a great idea, but there are consequences that have to be taken into account." 

************ 

Gordon walked in the front door, surveyed the area, and carefully headed into the kitchen. Janice was just finishing putting her father's medication together. He asked her if she had seen his mother prowling around. 

She laughed. "No, your mother is taking a shower. I don't think there's anything you could do to get her upset for a long time." 

"I guess I'm going to have to learn how to do that." 

"The best way is to read good books. Don't read the smutty novels; do what Mister and Mrs. Schneider did before they got married." 

"What did they do?" 

"That would be telling tales out of school. You will have to ask them." 

"Why do I have the feeling I will get murdered if I asked them what they did intellectually, before they got married?" 

"I want to quote a very great man, and one of our greatest presidents: There is nothing to fear, but fear itself." 

"Zoie told me they live in the penthouse on the twenty-eighth floor of a building. I have a feeling if I asked Mister or Mrs. Schneider that question I would go down to the first floor without the use of an elevator." 

"Zoie would be very unhappy with her parents if they did something that to you." 

"I would be very unhappy with them if they did that to me. I would still be splattered all around the ground floor." 

"It would be a once-in-a-lifetime experience." 

"Yes, but it would be the end of my lifetime." 

"You have a choice to make: Is it, or isn't it worth the chance? If you don't come back from Charleston, I'll say a prayer for you." 

"Gee whiz Janice, that's mighty nice of you." 

"I thought so. I don't do that for everyone." 

"I want to use my mother's favorite expression at this point. ' I'm beginning to think I don't like you.' As a matter fact I'm almost sure of it." 

Janice laughed. "Gordon, you have to go with your gut. If you want to know something about Zoie's parent's romance, you ask. They knew, before they walked into the house, that you two were similar to them. It was something you said to Zoie when you first saw her. They were worried that you would do the same thing they did when they were your age. 

Then you went out, and did it. Your mom and dad didn't scream. Mister Schneider screamed for a moment and Mrs. Schneider cried. How much better reaction could you expect from two sets of parents, when two 16-year-old children tell them they want to get married? 

If I were you, I would ask both of them as you were sitting down to dinner. Just make sure there are no steak knives on the table." 

*************** 

"You bought bathing suits without me?" 

"You said we were leaving in two minutes. Even using the women's two minutes rule as a model, we knew you were taking too long. 

Monty, Janet, and I were standing by the front door. The engine was running. We didn't want to waste fuel and send excess emissions into the atmosphere. We decided you found something better to do, so we left without you." 

"Your father has trained you too well. You use logic as a way around the truth. It's not fair." 

"Monty picked out three very nice bathing suits, three shirts, and a pair of flip-flops for me. It took us twenty minutes. I like shopping with Monty, she is very efficient." 

"I don't want to hear that young man. The next time I say the word shopping, I'm going to have a handcuff on your ankle, and the other one around mine. I will not be deprived of the pleasure of taking you shopping." 

"I have an idea mom. When we get to our new planet, why don't you open the first shopping mall? It's sure to be a success, because you will have a monopoly on the sixty-nine other people living there." 

"You are not too old to be spanked young man." 

"I'm going to have to ask dad about that, because I hear him spanking you a lot." 

"You will not ask your father about that, not once, not ever." 

"Mom, Janice said I should speak to the Schneider's about their younger days, before they got married. I think it's only fair I ask you about your younger days." 

Janice said, "I'm out of here." 

After a moment she said, "Okay, let's go into your father's den, where we can have a little privacy." 

"Really, do you mean it?" 

"Do you really want to know how promiscuous I was?" 

"What I really want to know is why?" 

"Then we better sit down and talk." 

***************** 

96. Confessions of a Misspent Youth 

"Okay Gordon, you wanted to know why I was promiscuous as a young girl, and why I got pregnant with you during my first year of college. I will not excuse my own culpability, because I was as much at fault as the man who taught me about sex. 

At first, I was angry with him, when I was able to think about it. Then I became angry with myself, and used men to punish myself. Finally, I became resigned to the fact that I loved sex in every form, and continued having sex, as often as possible, for my own pleasure. It stopped the day I found out I was pregnant with you, because I knew I had to change. You saved my life. If I had continued down that self-destructive road, God only knows what diseases I would've caught and died from." 

I went home, and my parents took me in. They blamed themselves for my wayward behavior. It took me a long time to convince them it was not their fault. I never told my father it was his brother who introduced me to sex. 

You could call it rape, but it wasn't. I was an innocent. I was extremely naïve, and curious. I attended an all-girls Catholic School, and sex was never discussed. I had no idea what was happening to my body when my periods started. I thought I was dying, because I was bleeding so much. My mother told me it was a normal part of a growing up, but never went any further than that. Soon afterwards, my breasts started poking out my chest, and she bought me my first bra. 

My dad was a very successful businessman. He traveled all over the world, and sometimes my mother went with him. I stayed with my uncle and aunt. 

My uncle was not a successful man, but my father always took care of him. He never wanted for anything. He lived in a nice house, drove nice cars, and had money in the bank. My uncle idolized my father, and did everything my father asked him to do. He demanded that I stay at his home when they would go out of town. It was the least he could do to show his appreciation. 

My aunt loved to sew. She spent countless hours in her sewing room. She was so good local stores carried her handmade dresses and other designs. 

While she was busy, I was with my uncle in his den. We would watch television, or a movie. His hands would rub all over my body. 

I felt loved. It felt good, and I didn't stop him. 

Soon, I was sitting on his lap and his hands were rubbing up and down my thighs and chest. 

He was wearing shorts and told me to rub his thighs, just like he was rubbing mine. 

I did. 

One night I felt this thing under his shorts and asked him what it was. He told me it was called many things, but it was what made him different from me. 

My parents never talked to me about the birds and bees. I was so very naïve in the areas of sex, and gender I asked him why we were different. 

"You are a girl, and I am a boy." 

"Why does that make us different? We are both human." 

"Jennifer, you are very young, are you sure you want to know?" 

I huffed. "I am thirteen years old. My period has begun, so I am a woman. I want to know what makes us different." 

"Alright, but you can never tell your aunt, or your parents what we are about to do. They could send me to jail, and your father would never talk to me again." 

"I promise. I want to know what makes us different." 

"You may be embarrassed by what I'm going to tell you to do." 

"Uncle Mack, tell me what to do and I will do it." 

"Stand up, and take your panties off." 

Although I was shocked to my core, I could not show it. I wanted adult knowledge, and now I had to pay the piper. I stood up and reached under my dress, and took my panties off. 

"Now what do I do Uncle Mack?" 

He stood up, and took off his shorts and underwear. I think my jaw hit the floor. It was the first time I had seen a penis, and it was fully enlarged. 

"Reach between your legs Jennifer and tell me what you feel." 

"I feel the place I bleed from between two lips." 

"Do you know what that's called?" 

"Yes, it's called my vagina." 

"Good, now take your hand, reach out, and hold what I have in front of me." 

I reached out and took his penis in my hand. I held part of the helmet and part of the rod at the same time. The helmet was soft but the rod was stiff. 

"Uncle Mack what is this called?" 

"It is called a penis, and many other things. However, it is what makes me different from you. This is the part of me that goes into your vagina, and if everything goes right, a baby is made. This is the reason God created a man, and woman." 

"They talk about God creating a man and a woman in religion class. They never talk about the penis and vagina part at all." 

"It's because the church does not want you to think about sex, until you get married. It is an unrealistic point of view in this day and age. It's been unrealistic since the day Jesus was born. Men and women are not supposed to be tied to only one man, or one woman. They are made to enjoy their bodies, even after they get married. They are allowed to play with as many partners as they like." 

"Was it that way when Jesus was born?" 

"Yes, when Jesus was born it was quite common for a man to have three or four wives, and as many fourteen or more children." 

"Why is your penis so hard? It looks uncomfortable. Is it always that way?" 

"No, it only gets hard when I'm excited." 

"What are you excited about now?" 

"I am standing in front of a beautiful young woman who has no panties on. I would love to touch her, and I would love her to touch me. That's why I'm excited." 

"Would you show me how?" 

"I will show you everything you would like to know, as long as you remember you can't tell anyone what we are doing. 

"I promise, I'll never say a word." 

************** 

That evening was the beginning of my sexual awakening, and the downfall of my morality. My uncle Mack took my cherry with his finger that night. He kissed me while he did it, so when I screamed I didn't make a sound. He told me it was better this way so when he made love to me it wouldn't hurt. I didn't even know what making love meant. 

Two years later, my father made him a vice president in a corporation he owned in Washington State. By that time, I was my uncle's whore. I knew more about sex than women twice my age. I cried when he left. My parents thought it was cute. 

I became angry with him. I almost told my dad what he had done to me. I didn't because I loved my him. My uncle Mack left me behind for a job. It was the best thing for him and my aunt. So instead of being angry with him, I became angry at myself for being so ignorant. 

I began using men to punish myself for being so stupid. I thought he would stay with me forever. I got a reputation with the boys, when I entered high school. It wasn't a good one. 

I stopped screwing around indiscriminately, when I was a junior in high school. I became very selective, and my grades went up. I had sex, but when I did, it was for my pleasure. I liked sex I liked it a lot. 

Then I went to college, and that was a big mistake. I had myself under control, until I got there. The dorms were coed. Boys and girls were screwing in the hallways. You had to step over them to get to your dorm room. When my roommate and I went to take a shower, we had to stand guard for each other. If we didn't, anyone could walk in and join you. 

After a few weeks in that atmosphere, I couldn't take it anymore. My libido kicked in, and I joined in the partying. It was seven days and nights of fucking, nonstop. I rarely went to class. 

Then I met your father, and I fell head over heels in love. He was twenty-five years old, and he was gorgeous. I thought he was in love with me. I was sure of it. We became an item, and we were monogamous. I would have bet my life we would get married sooner or later, until the day I told him I was pregnant with you. He shocked me when he said he wanted nothing to do with you or me. He left, and I never saw him again. I was crushed. 

I went home to my parents, and I didn't have sex again, until the day I married Even. It was a little bit more than four years, and it was all because of you. You saved my life Gordon. You were the best thing that ever happened to me. Thank you for being my son." 

"Thank you for being my mom. I love you more than anything I can say, or do." 

"Did I answer everything you wanted to know?" 

"I'd like to know one more thing if you don't mind mom?" 

"No I am not going to answer that question, because you will get into trouble. As I said in the beginning of this sordid tale, it was as much my fault as it was his." 

"It's not true and you know it. You were thirteen years old. You were a baby and he took advantage of you. I'll put him in the ships nuclear compartment and roast him alive. When we extend it into space, what's left of him will be freeze-dried for eternity." 

"It was nearly 17 years ago Gordon. My life has changed for the better since then. I got you, and then I got your father. God has given me two gifts I didn't deserve. Please let it be; if I can live with my past, you can live with it too." 

"Do you see how strong your mother is Gordon?" 

Jennifer yelled, "What are you doing out of bed?" 

"My nurse said it was time for me to get my lazy ass out of bed, and start walking. I am following her direct orders." 

"Hannah does he have your permission to walk?" 

"If he didn't, he would have my needle up his ass." 

"It wouldn't be the first thing you masochists have shoved up there." 

"Be careful what you wish for Doctor Luck, I'm only one step behind you." 

"How long is he supposed to be out of bed Hannah?" 

"He is allowed to be out of bed six times a day, between five and ten minutes each time. We have to start increasing his muscle tone, and stamina." 

"How soon do I get to eat real food?" 

"It all depends on what you consider real food Doctor. If you are thinking about meat, that is about six months away. You will begin eating fish next week. Soft vegetables and cooked fruit will also be on the menu in very small amounts. The dietitian will start earning her money now. She will be watching you like a hawk. Your stomach has not had to digest anything in almost 6 months. There is a lot less of it, and you're missing your duodenum. It will be a very slow process to bring you back to normal." 

The telephone rang, and I heard Jennifer say, "Okay were on our way." 

I looked expectantly at her. 

"Your granddaughter is on her way." 

"Tell Delicious I'm sorry I can't be there for her. Kiss the baby for me, and congratulate Gray on the birth of his daughter." 

"I will, and if you do anything stupid while I'm gone, I will use Hannah's needle on you." 

"Thank you for that image dear, I think I'll behave." 

"That's my good boy." 

*************** 

Hannah said, "Congratulations Doctor, do they have a name for the baby yet?" 

"Thank you Hannah, yes they have; they are naming her Teddy." 

"That's a very powerful name; do you know what it means?" 

"I have no idea." 

"In French, English, and Greek it means 'Wealthy, and Prosperous. They also love to travel. They have a powerful inner force, and others are drawn to them. They take on seemingly impossible tasks and complete them. They demand discipline of themselves and of those around them. 

They have one huge flaw. They are quick tempered and are easy to anger. You run for the hills when they are not happy." 

I dropped my head and said a prayer. "Please dear God, don't let them kill each other. They are three peas in a pod. My sister, my daughter, and my granddaughter; they could upset the balance of heaven and earth." 

My sister popped into my head. "That wasn't funny Even." 

"I thought you weren't talking to me." 

"Why wasn't I talking to you?" 

"Is your brain out to lunch? You were angry with me. Please don't talk to me right now, I have more on my plate than I can handle." 

"She never gives you more than you can handle Even. You should know that by now. She tested you twice, and you were not found wanting. You have work to do. You will not be allowed to rest, until you have completed your tasks. You don't have to be at work to work. You can still use your brain to conquer the problems you face. You know what the problems are fix them. If you are not in space within fifteen months, your project will fail." 

"We have too much work to do. It's not possible to do it all in fifteen months. We need twenty months at a minimum to complete the work ahead of us." 

"I was told fifteen months. You have been given until Christmas day of next year to begin your travels. After that your project will fail." 

"Please God we need more time." 

God did not answer my direct call to Her; neither did my irascible sister. 

"Hannah, I need a telephone please." 

"First you are going back to bed Doctor." 

I knew better than to argue with Hannah, and her lethal weapon. 

I crawled back into bed, and was grateful she insisted I be there. I was exhausted. She took my vitals, and looked at me. 

"Doctor, your numbers are all wrong. They are all over the place, what happened?" 

"I had a flashback, and I got very upset. I'll be okay in a little while." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 20



"You certainly will be." 

She went into the kitchen, took a syringe, and put medication into it. She returned to my side, swiped an alcohol swab on my arm, and injected the medication into my arm. 

"What was that Hannah?" 

She said politely, "Good night Doctor." 

"I have phone calls..." I was out like a light. You don't fool around with Hannah. 

I hate waking up and staring into those disapproving eyes. 

"I didn't do anything," I said defensively. "I was sitting down and..." 

"Even if you lie to me I'm going to stick Hannah's needle in your eyes." 

"You wouldn't do that to a sick man." 

"Try me." 

"Jen leave me alone for a little while, I have things I have to figure out." 

"If I leave, I'm going back to Denver, permanently." 

"I would die if you did that to me." 

"What type casket would you like?" 

"Dammit, my sister paid me a visit. Are you happy now? She said if we are not off the ground by Christmas Day of next year the project will fail. There is no way we can meet that deadline. We don't know if the stasis project is ready. The nuclear engine will not be here for eleven months. If everything goes perfectly with its installation and testing, that brings us to fifteen months. There is not enough time to get it all done by a year from Christmas. It would take a miracle." 

"So what is the great Doctor Even Luck going to do about it? Is he going to lie in bed and get sick over it; or is he going to get well and get back to work so he can attempt to make that deadline. If he fails, at least he can say to himself and his investors he gave it his best shot." 

"You are as much a pain in my ass as the needle is. I'm beginning not to like you Jennifer. As matter of fact, I'm sure I don't like you." 

She laughed at me. "I thought I was supposed to say that." 

"You do, and quite often I believe. I don't like getting my ass kicked, but I will do it. I will get better, and I will do my best to finish the spacecraft on time. If I do, it will not be my doing; it will be Her doing. It is not humanly possible to finish that ship in fifteen months." 

****************** 

Gordon was up bright and early Monday morning with two suitcases packed and waiting by the front door. He waited for Tammy to bring me my morning medication to come in to say goodbye. 

"Hi dad, I have to leave for Austin and wanted to make sure you are alright before I left." 

"What could possibly be wrong with me that another three months of healing won't fix? Just as Doctor Mozia said, "It's going to take time; time and patience. I tried to beat the system and found out that the system can't be beaten. I will follow the rules and I will get better. I want you to have the time of your life. I want you to get to know Zoie. I know you two are meant for each other. So did Dycke and Payne even though they didn't want to admit it. 

Beware of their sons; you will get the ribbing of your life from both of them. Zoie was the Bain of their existence until recently. They will get even for that by taking it out on you." 

"Thanks for the warning dad; thanks to Monty I will be able to defend myself." 

"Wake up your mother and say goodbye." 

"Who could sleep with you to making such a racket? I can't wait for you to go back to work Even, I was able to get more sleep back then." 

Jennifer's head peeked out from under the covers and she kissed her son goodbye. 

"Do you have your cash, ATM, and credit cards with you?" 

"Yes mom, I'm ready to go." 

"Okay, be better than I was at your age." 

"If you tell me where he is, I will make sure he will not molest another young girl again." 

"We went over that last night Gordon. It's time for you to go on vacation. I love you. I love that you are concerned about me. If that didn't happen to me, I wouldn't have you, and I wouldn't have this worthless piece of garbage lying next to me." 

"I resemble that remark." 

"Dad I meant to ask you one question that mom didn't answer me last night. She said I was not too old to be spanked. I hear you spanking her all the time. When do you become too old to be spanked? Mom is getting old." 

Jennifer screamed as she threw off the blankets. "Old my ass, I'm still young enough to catch you. 

Gordon yelled, "Goodbye dad," as he ran down the hallway and out the front door to the safety of the SUV waiting to take him to Zoie. 

Jennifer stopped at the front door and yelled to him. "I'm not going to kill you when you come home. Death would be too quick and painless. I'm going to poison you slowly and watch you come apart at the seams. On your final day on this earth, I'm going to spank the crap out of you." 

Gordon yelled back, "Can I watch dad spank you first?" 

Jennifer took off her slipper and threw it at him. It wasn't even close. 

"Goodbye mom!" 

"Goodbye Gordon, have fun." (I'm going to kill you when you get back.) 

She walked back into the bedroom and gave me that look again. 

"Okay, what did I do this time?" 

"He wants to watch you spank me." 

I hurt myself laughing. It was fun as she climbed over me to get back into bed. Certain wonderful parts of her anatomy passed over my lips, and paused so I could suckle to my heart's content. Nursing on these wonderful pink protrusions would help any man recover more quickly. 

**************** 

97. The Mile High Club 

Zoie was bouncing up and down on her toes, in front of the hotel, waiting for Gordon's arrival. He called her as soon as they got off the interstate and said they would be in front of their hotel in nine minutes. 

*********** 

She screamed in excitement, grabbed her father's arm, and pulled him out of their penthouse hotel room. She forced him to run to the elevator with her. 

"Zoie, he is supposed to wait for you. You are not supposed to wait for him." 

"Dad, I haven't seen him since Saturday. Does it really matter which one of us waits?" 

"I guess it doesn't. 

With guards on surrounding them, they waited as the black SUV turned into the circular driveway in front of the Hilton Hotel. 

Zoie jumped into Dycke's arms, kissed him, and said, "He's here!" 

"Remember Zoie be a lady." 

Gordon got out of the car, and turned just in time to catch Zoie as she floated through the air to greet him. They kissed. 

Dycke shook his head. "I guess we didn't have time to teach her how to be a lady." 

When they broke their kiss, a spark arced between their lips. 

Zoie giggled. "I guess we still have it." 

"How are you this fine morning Miss Schneider?" 

"I am fabulous now that you're here Mister Luck." 

"Could I ask you a favor?" 

"Anything your heart desires." 

"Can I put you down and take three steps back so I can see what you're wearing today and compliment you on it. The less important part of our conversation will be finished, and we can get on to the more important things in our lives." 

"Just how long do we have to be that far apart Gordon?" 

"I think two possibly three seconds will be enough." 

"Okay, but don't be like the other boys and start at the chest. They always get stuck there." 

"I'll start at your shoes and work my way up. Ready?" 

"Yes." 

"Okay, on the count of three I'm going to put you down. 1,2,3." 

"Magnificent." 

Gordon pulled Zoie to him, and kissed her. He said it again, "My God are you beautiful. Now I know what you're wearing too." 

"You can't possibly know what I'm wearing. You didn't have enough time to look." 

"Would you like to know how many inches from your left knee your freckle is?" 

"You saw my freckle; no one notices that little thing." 

"I did." 

***************** 

"I'm sorry to break up your reunion kids, but your mother called and the airplane is ready to go." 

"I forgot about your mom being a great pilot." 

"She's okay, I guess." 

"Zoie is your mother a great pilot or not? If she's not I'm not getting on the airplane." 

"My mom is the best pilot my dad has. She's an instructor, and there are only two others in the fleet like her." 

"Did you and your mother have an argument over us yesterday?" 

"Sort of." 

"Do you want to wait until we're in the air to discuss it, or do you want to delay our departure and do it now? If there's going to be a problem with me going to Charleston with you, I'll stay here." 

"No, it was nothing like that. We'll talk about it when we're in the air. Okay?" 

"Okay." They got into the limousine and headed off to the airport. 

"Good morning Mister Schneider." 

"Good morning Gordon, have you ever flown in a private jet before?" 

"That's sort of the tricky question." 

"Why, the answer should be yes, or no." 

"But then again, sir, there's my dad, and crazy things happen when he's involved." 

"Yes, I've noticed that. What happened with your father?" 

"Do you remember when he had the aircraft accident in Alaska? I was only three years old when that happened." 

"Yes, I remember when that happened. It was all over the television news, and the print media." 

"He wanted to get us back to Denver but the airline said it was going to take several days to do it. Dad called my sister, and told her to have a private jet sent up from Seattle, or Minneapolis to take us back the following morning. He proposed to my mom that evening, and wanted to get back to Denver so they could get married. 

He picked us up early the following morning and took us to the airport. The flight crew was there waiting for us. We followed them out to the tarmac, and a brand-new Boeing 767 was waiting there to take us home. There were five crewmembers, and the three of us. Technically, it was a private airplane." 

"Delicious sent a Boeing 767 to pick up three people?" 

"No sir; when the chairman of Boeing heard my dad was safe he called to see if there was anything he could do to help my dad. Delicious told him she was in the process of hiring a plane to get him back to Denver the next day. He told her not to bother; he would take care of it. 

I had a lot of fun on the trip back. They let me sit in the flight deck. I learned that the airplane flew on wires, and the cockpit was made out of glass." 

Dycke laughed. "You've come a long way since that day Gordon." 

"My dad is an excellent teacher. I know being photographic is a big help, but if you don't know how to focus your energies on what you enjoy doing, it's just a waste of talent. It's like his friend Mister Laver says about my dad; if he had not wanted to get out of his father's house so badly, he would've never gone to MIT. He would have gone to a local college, and wound up being a high school science teacher." 

"Okay you two, we are here. I will take care of my wife's anxiety. She will be fine by the time we get to Charleston. You will have to set up your own parameters as you go along. We want you to enjoy your little vacation, and get to know one another." 

Zoie was flying through the air again, but this time it was towards her father. 

"Thank you daddy, I didn't want to go home and have another argument with mom." 

"It's okay baby; I'll just tell her you threw us out of the building." 

"Wouldn't it be easier if I moved downstairs to the Chase's apartment for a little while?" 

"Yes, but what would happen to all the drama if we did something as simple as that?" 

"Dad, sometimes you are a stick in the mud." 

"Zoie, I should have put you on birth control pills when you were two. I can't believe the difference in you." 

"Gordon, before we leave, could you ask your dad to build us a time machine. I want to go back to when I was two years old. I want to start taking birth control pills at that age. I want to see what type of child I would have been, and see if my parents would've enjoyed me more or less." 

"I don't care what you were growing up; I love who you are now. If the eyes are the windows to the soul, you are pure. You have never, and will never harm anyone. You are your parents' child. They raised you by example. They love each other, and their children fiercely. They worked hard to make you the wonderful person you are today. They protected you all your life; now that job belongs to me. I love you Zoie Schneider; I am going to make you the happiest bride on the New Earth." 

"You are going make me cry and ruin my make-up." 

"I didn't think you were wearing make-up. Your skin is flawless." 

"I used to have zits the size of quarters." 

"They were there to keep every other boy away from you, until you met me." 

Dycke yelled down from the entrance to the aircraft, "Are you two coming to Charleston with me, or are you going to stand down there for the remainder of the day talking?" 

"We are thinking about it dad. Gordon knows a Justice of the Peace, and we may elope." 

"Get up here this minute young woman, or I will have one of my guards shoot him." 

"Dad, you have no sense of humor." 

"Zoie, I am not laughing. I am the one who is going to be shot." 

"Come with me 'scaredy-cat'; he wouldn't kill you, he would just hurt you, a little." 

"Someone needs a spanking, and I am going to administer it." 

"Have you been talking to my dad? My mom and he get off on that stuff a lot. They even have paddles; I've seen them." 

The starboard engine started. 

"That's my mom warning us to get inside, or she is really going to get ticked off. No one fools with her flight plans." 

"I like the color of her airplane." 

They ran up the stairs, and into the aircraft. 

Zoie stuck her head into the flight deck and said, "Hi Mom!" 

Gordon followed, "Hello Mrs. Schneider." 

Payne responded, "The next time you two make me miss my departure time, I will leave you behind." 

"I'm sorry mom, but I had a tough decision to make. I could go home with you, or go to the Justice of the Peace with Gordon." 

Payne turned in her seat, looked at the two innocents smiling at her. "You would be dead before you said I Do." 

"I told you she would be reasonable about it Zoie." 

Payne realized she had been 'had' and was not thrilled about it. 

"Tell your father we are flying home inverted, because two wiseasses ticked me off." 

"Zoie this will be great practice for take-off on the spacecraft. Thank you Mrs. Schneider, this will be awesome." 

"Get to your seats, and buckle up. I will get both of you when we get home." 

"Love you mom." 

"SEATS!" 

99. Special Delivery 

Unlike Newton, who took his own sweet time being born, Teddy came into the world as if she was shot from a cannon. From the moment Delicious felt the first labor pain, until the 'Tiny Terror Teddy' entered the world, two hours and fifty-seven minutes elapsed. 

The doctor almost didn't make it to the hospital in time for the birth. She looked at the baby in her hands, and asked, "What the heck was your hurry?" 

Gray answered for her, "She's expecting four brothers and one sister very soon. When her mother gets home, we have to start working on them immediately." 

"I hate to burst your bubble Doctor Thyme, but rules are rules. There will be no sex for two months. That opening is closed." 

Delicious burst out into laughter. "Doris have you ever seen a more mournful face in your life?" 

"I see that face every time I see a man receive that news. I get such a thrill every time I give it to them. It's like I'm getting even for getting their wives pregnant in the first place." 

"I didn't plan this one Doctor, speak to her mother." 

"I thought your mother was dead Delicious." 

"It's a long story, but she speaks to Newton all the time." 

"I don't believe it." 

"Neither did we, but after a while we had to. There was no way my son could know the things he was telling us. It was unbelievable. I pray Teddy is normal. I don't know if I could put up with two of them in the same household." 

"Internally you look wonderful. You can go home Tuesday morning. All Teddy's tests are at the top of the scale. She is a little underweight, at five pounds four ounces and she is fifteen inches long. Let her name stay with a Y; everyone's going to spell it that way anyhow." 

"Thanks Doris, I'll see you in two weeks. When am I supposed to bring her to Doctor Greenspan?" 

"They will have that information for you when you check out." 

"Gordon, would you and Zoie like to be Teddy's godparents?" 

Gordon was shocked. "We haven't decided when to get married, but I would love it. I would be honored to do it, but wouldn't that be a problem?" 

"Do you see a problem with it mom?" 

"They are going to be married forever. There will be no problem with it at all." 

"I'm leaving with Zoie for Charleston tomorrow morning, when will the Christening be?" 

"Zoie's next break will be Thanksgiving. Verify that with her, and I will make the arrangements around it." 

"Thanks sis, this is going to be wild. I can't wait to see Zoie's reaction." 

Gordon walked over to his sister's bedside, kissed her, and shook Gray's hand. "Thanks for the other information Gray, at least I'll know something." 

Gray nodded. 

A nurse came in and took Teddy to the nursery. Everyone said their goodbyes so Delicious could get some rest. Gray stayed to keep his wife company. 

"How do you feel baby?" 

"I feel like I could run a half marathon. Teddy did all the work. I didn't do anything this time. There was hardly any pain, and it was over before it started. It was a totally different delivery than Newton's'. If the next five are like this one, they are going to be a snap." 

"Let's not jinx ourselves; let's just thank God this one was easy for you. We will work on the next one when the time is right. Remember to keep your birth control pills somewhere Newton can't get to them." 

"I'm will have to keep those pills on me. Newton wasn't the culprit, my mother was. Only God can stop her." 

"Gray what information did you give Gordon?" 

"Oh, it was work related." 

"He thanked you on a Sunday for information you gave him on Saturday?" 

Gray turned his head and started walking away. 

"Gray look at me." 

"I have to run out down to the nurses station, I'll be right back." 

"Grayson Thyme turn your ass around, and get over here now. What did you do wrong this time?" 

"I swear baby, I didn't do anything wrong." 

"Tell me exactly, word for word, what Gordon asked you. Then tell me what you did wrong." 

"Can I stand by the door?" 

"Why, how bad is it?" 

"I don't think it's bad, but I'm not sure how you are going to take it." 

"So it's that bad." 

"Remember, you're not allowed out of bed." 

"Tell me what you said to my fifteen-year-old brother." 

"He'll be sixteen in ten days." 

"Stop splitting hairs and tell me what you did wrong." 

"Gordon asked me what you and I did during the ten months we didn't have intercourse. I told him." 

"WHAT DID YOU TELL MY BROTHER WE DID?" 

"Everything!" 

"I'M GOING TO KIIIILLLLL UUUUUU! My little brother knows what we did in the privacy of our bedroom. Are you out of your fucking mind? He must think were perverts. Go home; I don't want to see you anymore today. I'm going to go crazy. I can't believe you did that. How am I going to look him in the eye ever again?" 

"Did you have a problem looking at him today?" 

"You know I didn't." 

"Did he treat you any differently today than he has in the past?" 

"No, he was his normal sweet self." 

"Then what are you worried about? We talked about this yesterday, because he wasn't seeing Zoie until today. He wasn't sure how to handle himself when he got to Charleston. He wasn't bringing condoms with him, because there was no time to show him what to buy, or how to put them on properly. 

Even was supposed to do that with him when they thought the time was right. Unfortunately, your dad didn't do it before he got sick, and I was the only other person he could ask. He was hesitant about asking me for help. He finally summoned up the courage to ask me what we did during those ten months before our wedding, and I told him. I couldn't let him go in to this relationship blind. It wouldn't be fair to Zoie, or him. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 20



He's not going to hire an airplane and have them sky write it all over town. He's going to use it as a database for himself. He and Zoie will establish their own limits as they go along." 

"Did Gordon know anything about sex?" 

"I know ten-year-olds that knew more about sex than Gordon did. He and Zoie are going to have a wonderful time learning about each other's bodies as they grow up." 

"Do you think you should call Dycke and let him talk to Gordon?" 

"First, I think Gordon would be furious with me for betraying a confidence. Second, I don't think he would be able to speak freely about exploratory sex, with the young woman's father." 

"Do you remember what happened to you on the evening of your father's wedding?" 

"Did you have to bring that up? I still shiver when I think of being naked, in the hallway, with Jennifer and dad looking at me. I had your goop all over my hands and chest. All I wanted to do was crawl into a hole, cover it over me, and die." 

"As I remember, I wasn't much help. I heard you scream, and ran into the hallway to see if you had been hurt. The only problem was I was naked. When I saw your parents standing by their room, I believe my profound words were, "Oh Shit!" 

"Yes, but you were smart enough to turn around, and run back into our bedroom. I was frozen to the spot where they saw me. Jennifer; I wanted to kill Jennifer. She always has the perfect words to say. "Is it Delicious, Delicious?" 

I finally gained enough courage to move into the bathroom. I screamed, "I'm not talking to either one of you for the rest of your lives." 

I could hear my parents laughing at us from their bedroom. You could sleep through a tornado, and not be bothered by it. I wasn't sure if I loved you more, or hated you that evening. I did envy you, because it took me hours to fall asleep." 

"Do you feel better now baby?" 

"Do I feel better about what?" 

"Do you feel better about my conversation with Gordon?" 

"Husband, you are a sneaky son of a bitch. You pick the most embarrassing moment of my life, then you compared it to what you did with my brother. He is still only fifteen years old, and so innocent. Are you sure he was ready for that?" 

"He's going to be sixteen in ten days. Over fifty percent of sixteen-year-olds have already had sex. It was better for him to hear it from me, then for him to pick up a magazine, or watch the Internet and learn it from them." 

"You are right. I just hope they go slow, like we did." 

"Babe, compared to us, I think they will be moving like a 300 pound tortoise." 

"It would be wonderful for both of them to move that slow." 

************** 

Gordon turned his seat towards the rear of the aircraft so he could look at Zoie. She began telling him all the wonderful things he would see in the historical area of Charleston. When the seatbelt sign went off, she jumped from her seat into Gordon's lap, and kissed him. It may have been the fastest she ever moved in her life. 

After the bright spark died down, she said, "I love being in love with you. It's the best thing that ever happened to me." 

"Do you mean being in love with me is better than getting rid of the quarter sized zits that covered your beautiful face?" 

Zoie put her head on his shoulder, and bit his earlobe. "The zits are close second, but you are definitely the winner." 

"My sister wants us to be godparents to Teddy. Would you like that?" 

"It would be awesome. You would belong to me forever. If anything would happen to Teddy's parents, we would have to stay together to raise her properly. She would need a two parent home. I would have you trapped, with a noose around your neck, and a nose ring. Call your sister now, and tell her yes." 

"Who runs your household Zoie?" 

"My mom does." 

"Are your brothers married?" 

"Yes they are." 

"Who runs their households?" 

"Their wives do." 

"Do you want to guess who runs my parent's house?" 

"Your mother?" 

"Are you beginning to see a pattern developing?" 

Zoie kissed Gordon's neck. "Are you telling me once were married, I have the upper hand?" 

"Remember the beginning of that sentence Zoie. Until we are married, I have the upper hand. After we are married, I become your golden retriever, collar, and all." 

"Oh goody, I always wanted a puppy." 

Gordon kissed her, and nibbled on her lower lip. "Remember my love; puppies grow up into mature animals. When you pull on the leash too hard, they can get angry, and run away." 

"I will never put a leash on you. I'll spank you instead." 

"I have no idea what this spanking stuff is about, but everyone seems to love it." 

"I'll teach you." 

"How would you know about spanking?" 

"When I was younger, I would sit by my parent's door and listen. It didn't matter which one of them was being spanked, because they both loved it. 

Let me give you a word of advice; don't ever bet against my father. He does not lose. My mom doesn't know how he does it neither does my Uncle Steve. My dad does not lose a bet." 

"Thank you for that information Zoie, forewarned, is forearmed." 

"Let's tell my dad about being godparents to Teddy, and see what his reaction is to it." 

**************** 

Dycke was working on his computer, when he noticed four feet on the floor to his left. 

"Are you two ganging up on me again?" 

"No Mister Schneider, I just told Zoie something, now I wanted to tell you. I'm impotent, and cannot have children." 

"What; you proposed to my daughter without telling her you were impotent in advance? Don't you think she had a right to know this before she made her decision?" 

Zoie giggled at her father's reaction. 

Dycke looked at the two of them, and saw the smirks on their faces. 

"What is with you two? I've known you for seven years Gordon, and you've never told a joke. You've been with my daughter twice over three days, and you are driving me crazy with these things. You do know I have access to a gun, don't you?" 

"Yes sir, I do, but Zoie told me you would not kill me, you would only hurt me. I just wanted to see you smile." 

Dycke did smile. "Okay, I know she can't be pregnant, what do you two want from me now?" 

"My sister asked us to be Godparents to Teddy. We would both like to do it. We just wanted your thoughts on the subject." 

"I think it's a wonderful gesture by your sister. As long as you are sure you could raise Teddy as your own, I believe you should do it." 

Zoie kissed her father. "Thank you dad, it's what we wanted to do, but we wanted an adult opinion." 

Dycke closed his computer, and told the kids to sit down. 

"You two have made an adult decision; you have decided to get married. Even and I believe you should wait at least one year before that happens. Gordon will be seventeen, September 30. Zoie, you will be eighteen, December 24. Any time between those dates will be fine with either of us. However, Zoie, if you want your mother to be in heaven when you get married, a Christmas wedding would do it for her. She was so disappointed when you came a day early. She wanted her legs tied together to keep you inside until after midnight, but you were determined to be born on the twenty-fourth. I'm not sure if a church will be available on the twenty-fourth for an afternoon wedding. I'm not sure if the two of you will agree to it. It means waiting three additional months before you get married, and again that has to be your decision. 

Then we need to make a decision as to where to hold the wedding. I want to hold it in the same church your mother and me were married. Even wants to hold it inside 'The 'Good Luck'. It will be in the finishing stages of completion, and should look awesome. This will be your decision, again. 

Your gown will be made by the same design house that made your mothers' gown. That is not negotiable. Her gown has been featured on more magazine covers than I can remember. The last time it was featured was on Bride's Magazines last March. Payne and I have been married twenty-six years, that's how timeless the design of her gown is. 

Now for the biggie, Zoie you will continue taking your birth control pills until you get married, after that, you and Gordon will decide your future. You have our permission to sleep together if you so desire. It is the arrangement I had with my parent's, and Payne had with hers. I don't see any reason to be hypocritical about it with the both of you. You are much younger then Payne and I were. We were both eighteen. I would suggest you both read extensively on the subject of sex, as we did, before we did anything. It made our first time much more pleasurable, because we knew what we were doing." 

"Zoie return to your seat. I want to talk to Gordon alone." 

"Don't you hurt him dad." 

"Does it sound like I'm going to hurt him?" 

"I'm never sure what you're going to do." 

"For fifteen years of your life I wanted to throw you off the balcony, and I didn't. Go to your seat young lady." 

"That wasn't nice dad." 

"It may not have been nice Zoie, but it was true, every word of it." 

*********** 

"Did you bring condoms with you Gordon?" 

"My dad and I were supposed to buy some when the time was right. I never met a girl my age, until I met and fell in love with your daughter. My dad is bedridden, as you know, so I couldn't go with him. I had a long talk with Gray on Saturday, but we worked most of the day, and didn't have a chance to buy any, and for him to show me how to put them on properly. I promise you I will not be having intercourse with Zoie until I am completely knowledgeable on the use of condoms, and she is fully protected." 

"That is a very smart precaution, because even though she is on the pill, they are not completely safe. Recent studies have downgraded them from ninety-nine percent effective, to ninety-seven percent effective. She is still in school, and the last thing she needs is to be ridiculed by her classmates for being pregnant, before she is married." 

"I would never let that happen, Mister Schneider. The day Zoie tells me she is pregnant will be the day we get married." 

"You are an amazing young man Gordon. I felt the same way about Payne. One more thing, Zoie is ticklish. She is especially ticklish under her rib cage. She loses control immediately." 

"Now isn't that a shame. Do you think I would take advantage of a young woman with a condition like that?" 

"You would be a fool not to." 

"I wholeheartedly agree. Thank you Mister Schneider, I'm going to rejoin my fiancé." 

"Enjoy yourself, just remember we are at 51,000 feet, and if she throws you out of the airplane, it's a long way down." 

"I don't believe I would bounce sir." 

*************** 

99. Do Not Disturb 

No one was sitting down. They kept watching the 'Beauty Box' waiting for it to open automatically. This was an intricate part of the test. If it didn't work, one year was wasted, not on the human experiment, but on the technical side of the experiment. According to their calculations, the box should have opened more than three hours ago, but it showed no signs of doing so. 

Junie was still in a deep sleep, her vital signs were nominal, and everything was working properly; except the program should have ended. It hadn't, and they were worried. 

Callum and Cassie were ordered not to touch anything, as Patti, Laura, and Anna rushed back to check the main computer in the basement to see if they had made a mistake on the day, hour, or minute the box was to open. 

They checked the primary and secondary computer outputs. They were correct. The box should have opened a little more than three hours ago. 

They were halfway back to the barn when they heard Callum yell, "The light went on, the box is opening." 

Laura yelled, "Don't Touch Her!" 

They climbed the ladder to the loft, threw Callum out of the way, and checked Junie's vital signs. She was still in a deep sleep, but that was to be expected. 

Laura inserted an oxygen cannula into her nose, and put the gauge up to 100 percent. It would get the anesthesia out of her system quickly. 

Anna made the electrolyte mixture, and brought a pail for Junie to vomit in if necessary. It happened in all the movies, but this was the first time anyone had done it in real life. 

Patti said, "She's coming out of it." 

Laura turned around and faced him. "So help me God Callum, if you touch her, I will cut your balls off, and feed them to you." 

"I understand, Laura. I will stay back, I promise." 

Cassie said, "Come here big guy, hang on to me, until they finish checking her out." 

Jemma stuck her head above the loft, and asked, "Can I watch?" 

"Absolutely Jemma, she's just about to wake up." 

"Perfect timing." 

Laura was looking down at Junie, and said, "You slept enough. It's time for you to wake up. Come on Junie, open those eyes, and look at me." 

Patti said, "Her vital signs are now normal. Her oxygen saturation rate is ninety-eight percent, she should be awake." 

"She should be, but she's not. What the fuck did we do wrong?" 

Callum started pushing his way forward. 

Laura turned, "Callum, if you take one more step I'll kill you." 

Callum stopped dead in his tracks. He knew a real threat when he heard it. 

Laura placed a stethoscope over Junie's carotid artery. The blood was flowing smoothly to her brain. She checked Junie's heart and it was pumping perfectly. She couldn't understand why Junie was not awake. She decided to try something outrageous." 

She moved her mouth close to Junie's ear. "It's your wedding day Junie; it's time for you to wake up." 

She stood back and waited. There was a muscles twitch on the right side of her face, and then another one. Her right eye blinked, blinked, blinked, and stayed closed. Her mouth opened, and she breathe in. Her right eye opened and tried to focus. There was no movement on the left side of her face. 

Laura looked into Junie's eye. "If you can hear me try to move either of your hands." 

Junie moved her left hand and it dropped back to the mattress. 

"Junie if you'd like a drink, move either of your hands?" 

Junie raised her right hand. 

Anna placed the straw into Junie's mouth, and squeezed the bottle slowly. After three seconds she stopped. After ten seconds, she squeezed the bottle again and repeated the procedure. 

Junie finished the entire sixteen ounces of electrolytes, and Anna went to refill the bottle. 

Laura asked Junie to wiggle the toes on her right leg. 

She did. 

She accomplished the same task on the left leg. 

Laura looked at her mother and said, "Here goes." 

"Junie follow my finger." 

Laura placed her finger at the 12 o'clock position and moved it slowly to 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock, and watched carefully to see if Junie would move her neck as she went to the 3 o'clock position. She moved her finger ever so slowly, and Junie's head followed. 

Everyone in the room wanted to scream and dance, with joy. 

"Junie follow my finger the other way." 

Junie followed the instructions and turned her head completely to the left. 

Unbidden Junie said, "Thirsty." 

"Welcome back Junie, it's been one year." 

Junie was drinking the electrolyte solution, and didn't answer. When she finished she said, "Would someone wash out my left eye, it feels like its glued closed." 

"Callum bring me the saline solution, and eye drops, please." 

Laura stopped him before he was in Junie's line of sight. "One more minute please." 

Laura cleaned out both of Junie's eyes and asked her if her vision was clear. 

"Yes, everything looks good." 

"Good, now I'm going to give you a memory test. Do you remember who this asshole is? He's been bothering me for a year. He thinks you lost weight." 

Callum walked into her view, and Junie lit up like a Christmas display. 

Callum bent into box and kissed her. 

"I don't want to rush you or anything, but when are we getting married?" 

"Can I take a shower first?" 

Laura said, "Mom, her brain is working fine. She doesn't want him to get away." 

"Callum get Junie the crutches; it's time to see if she can walk." 

"Junie as we bring you to vertical, you must let us know immediately if you feel any pain in your spine. This is imperative, a disk may have degenerated, or a bone may have fractured. We may have to take you to a hospital for treatment. Okay?" 

"Yes, let's do this thing and see if we got 100 on this test." 

They used a hydraulic lift to bring her up very slowly. At seventy degrees, Callum gave Junie her crutches, and verified the length. As she went to complete vertical she smiled. 

"I don't have any pain. I have muscle stiffness but no pain." 

"Use the crutches, and go for a walk." 

She walked the length of the loft in the barn and back, with aides on both sides. She handed Anna the crutches. She kissed Callum, and took him for a walk down and back the loft. 

Junie said, "I think the three of you built me a winner. I feel fine." 

"Fantastic, now all you have to do is call Delicious and tell her. She just had a baby girl, and her name is Teddy." 

"You can't trust anyone when you're sleeping. Did she at least take care of our railroad?" 

"What railroad?" 

"All of them went bankrupt this year." 

"I believe that when they stop putting corn into cars. Come on muscles, I want to put one of your muscles to use right after I take a shower." 

"Call Delicious first, it's more important than getting laid." 

"Okay I'll call her, but I'm not getting laid. Callum promised he was going to make love to me as soon as I woke up. I'm going to hold him to that promise." 

"That girl has an excellent memory; he told her that over a year ago today." 

**************** 

They landed at the Charleston International Airport 3 ½ hours later, due to the one-hour time difference. When the plane came to a halt in front of the hanger, Gordon stood up. 

Zoie said sternly, "Sit down." 

"Why, we're here aren't we?" 

"Do you have rules set up by your agents in Texas?" 

"Yes." 

"Then unless you want to wind up face down on the floor, with one of dad's agents kneeling on your back, reciting the rules to you, I would sit down." 

Gordon sat down instantly, not only remembering what his father said, but thinking of what Monty would do to him if he disobeyed one of her rules. 

"What happens now, Zoie?" 

"It depends. Limousines or SUVs will pull up to the stairs of the aircraft. Our agents will call us when it's our time to depart. No one passes the yellow line on the floor in the front of the aircraft; until the agent takes you by the arm and says go. It should take you no longer than eight seconds to go from the door of the aircraft into the limousine. 

Don't look around, don't talk about the weather, get in the limousine. If I slip and fall, don't stop to pick me up, get in limousine. The agents will pick me up and throw me into the limousine." 

"Do you remember my mother saying to me, "Don't fall, and break your neck?" There was a reason for that warning. I was a failure at ballet, and I was worse at gymnastics. Although I have only two legs, I have four left feet. When I try to do something fancy with them, I usually wind up on the floor." 

"Should we start taking dancing lessons for our wedding?" 

"ME, DANCING, you will be taking your life in your hands." 

"No, I will be taking you in my arms. You also have to dance with your father; it's traditional." 

"Oh God, I'm going to maim the two men I love the most in the same night." 

"Don't forget, you have to dance with my father too." 

"Why don't we hold a reception at a hospital? It will be easier than transporting the walking wounded from miles away." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 20



"Zoie Schneider, you are going to be a graceful, beautiful bride." 

"Gordon Luck, you have more faith in me than I have in myself." 

"I can explain that easily." 

"Go ahead; I can't wait to hear this." 

"I never saw you with zits." 

Zoie got out of her chair, smacked him on the shoulder, sat on his lap, and kissed him. 

"They were ugly as hell. The dermatologist used everything he had, and couldn't control them. Nothing worked; absolutely nothing. Thankfully, when I turned fifteen, they disappeared. I expected to have craters on my face, but I don't have one. I was very lucky." 

"I never had a pimple. I don't believe my mother has either. It must be genetic." 

"Miss Zoie, it's time." 

"Come on dummy, I'll show you how this is done." 

"I'll sit here, because I know you're not talking to me." 

"Come on Gordon it's time to get off the airplane." 

"I thought you were taking dummy with you." 

"Gordon, you and I are going to have a long talk." 

"Zoie, your rear end, and my hand are going to meet quite often." 

"Sadist." 

He followed her instructions to a T, and watched her as she disembarked the aircraft. He did not hesitate when the agent put his hand on his arm, and said go. Seven seconds later, he was in the backseat of the limousine with Zoie and her parents.  

"Great landing; Mrs. Schneider." 

"Flattery will get you nowhere Gordon. I still owe you for the Justice of the Peace remark." 

"That wasn't me ma'am, that was Zoie. I was the one that told Mister Schneider I was impotent and couldn't have children." 

"What do you mean you can't have children?" 

Dycke took Payne's hand and told her to relax. "Dear that was the joke they played on me." 

"I thought you told me he was a very serious young man?" 

"He was, until he met our Zoie. She has the ability to change people; you know that, as well as I do." 

"You poor boy, I hope you know what you're getting into." 

"MOTHER, that's not nice." 

"Zoie, your parents could tell me you are Attila the Nun. You are still mine. Sometime between September 30 and December 24 of next year, we are getting married. If they continue to annoy you, one morning they will wake up to find out we have eloped, and you are pregnant with quintuplets." 

She put her head against his shoulder and laughed. 

Dycke and Payne were not laughing. 

Payne looked at Gordon. "She is my only daughter. You would not deny me of the right to give her a big beautiful wedding." 

"I would not deprive you of your dreams, Mrs. Schneider, as long as you treat my fiancée properly. If she becomes unhappy in her current situation, I will do everything in my power to make her happy. I am not dependent on anyone for money. I have several million dollars in the bank. I have patents in my name that will continuously make me money, and I have a job. If I were to lose that job, I guarantee you, when I put my 'Fusion Reactor' up for bids on the free market the first bid will be in the trillions of dollars. I will be richer than most governments on the planet." 

"Listen to the young man Payne, because he's right. His reactor is the most important breakthrough of this century." 

"No Mister Schneider, it's not. We've just made and another discovery that puts the reactor into second or third place. We will know soon enough. You may want to open your own bank to store this money, because you will own space. 

Governments will pay you to lease these highways to get them from point A to point B. We already know we can get people from here to there, because my father has done it. The question is can we get them back. If we can, time is no longer a factor in space travel. It would be like getting on a bus, and going to work every day." 

"Your dad didn't tell me anything about this discovery Gordon. When did he make it?" 

"My dad didn't realize he did, until we talked about it. I went to work and fed what we discussed it into the computer. It was part of his experience after his operation. He thought he was caught in the blackness of Space; and Time had stopped. I used that as a model, and made the calculations that proved he discovered how to use 'Supersymmetric' properties to make the first man-made wormhole." 

"Holy crap, how fast can you travel in it?" 

"There-in lies the conundrum. We can judge the outbound speed. It is in excess of 100 times the speed of light. We know the destination because we can program it by using 'Open-Ended Bosonic Strings' into the computer and creating a pathway to the planet. The problem is we can't pre-program the spacecraft to come back through the wormhole. It has to be done at the other end. 

The pilot of the spacecraft will be able to maneuver it after they get to our designated coordinates. They will fly the ship to and land it on the nearby the planet. The pilot and crew will be able to take samples, pictures, do scientific studies and anything else they were tasked to do while here on earth. When they return to space, they have to return to the exact coordinates of the exit of the wormhole. From that point in space, they must program their return trip. Even a minute error could send the spacecraft careening off course by billions of miles. 

To start this process, you have to build another spacecraft. We don't have the time to do it. The shame of it is everything we need is already here. We have the infrastructure. We have the experienced mechanical and technical personnel. Our Supply chain is intact. We would keep some of our current scientists but most of them are at their scientific limits. We would have to bring in advanced thinkers to replace them. What we don't have is time. We don't have enough time." 

"The scientists would need new leadership; someone who could bind them together, and keep them focused on the vision ahead. Everyone here looks to my father for that leadership. You could get that kind of leadership ability if you could convince someone like Doctor Maes from Berkeley, or Doctor Oyster from Caltech to run the program. There are a few other wonderful scientific minds that are not as charismatic but could run this program. There are not that many great charismatic scientist around this nation. There are fantastic scientists here, but they could bore a wall to death when they speak. 

Then there's the money, and who you would trust them to handle it. After 'The Good Luck' leaves on its journey, many people are going to call it a hoax, a big joke and so forth. Even though every camera on the globe will be following our progress, there will still be those naysayers that will say it never happened. We are going to file a flight plan so they can follow us and transmit over every available frequency. The question is how many times are you going to be willing to put up $17 billion of your money to build a spacecraft? Maybe the government would be interested in financing the project after our success, but I wouldn't want them to rule the project. Congress would screw it up royally, by cutting off funds to cut the deficit, or pay for one of their pet projects. 

The design is rather straightforward; it could be a duplicate of 'The Good Luck,' either bigger or smaller. The power needed to do it is astronomical, but using the design of my sister's engines, you could produce that much power on site. It could be done, and whoever is chosen to take that first trip is in for the ride of their lives. One hundred or more times the Speed of Light, and 'The Good Luck' will only be doing seven or eight. It is inconceivable, yet we have already conceived it. It's all part and parcel of Einstein's Unification Theory. He proved that motion through one medium (either time or space) effects the other. It's part of his Special Relativity Theory. Scientists have been working on all portions of his works since they were published in the early Nineteen thirty's, until he passed away. The latest models are "The Bosonic String Theories. Today there are Twenty-Six Dimensional Space/Time Coordinates. He didn't call them by that name, but it is his theories that promulgated the current science. 

My dad didn't realize he used one of them to break through what he called a dream. It was not a dream. He used a mathematical formula for an Open Ended String, and opened a gate in the Space/Time Continuum that allowed him to make his way back to us. 

My dad is an awesome thinker. I don't think there is anyone on this planet like him. I believe the last one like him was Albert Einstein, and I believe Einstein was not of this earth. He was at least 300 years ahead of everyone else. There is no explaining that brilliance, except to say he was from another world. I am not the first one, nor will I be the last one, to make that supposition." 

The last Great Genius before Einstein was Sir Isaac Newton. Although my sister proved you could negate gravities hold on a 'mass,' you can't negate it on a planet. The work he did in the late sixteen hundreds until his death in the seventeen twenties still hold true today. The comets he tracked still pass us by exactly as he predicted. 

Three Hundred years before Newton, Nicolaus Copernicus studied the nighttime sky using a telescope of his own design. His 'Heliocentric'(The Sun is the center of the universe) got him excommunicated from the Catholic Church because it was 'Heresy.' He discovered Trigonometry, and other mathematic formulas that are still used today. 

Do you notice these Mega-Geniuses show up every three hundred years. I find it an uncanny coincidence, and I do not believe in coincidences." 

"Do you always glow when you talk about science?" 

"I didn't know I was glowing, but I know I always get excited when I talk about it. It's an awesome feeling, when you can touch the future with your mind. 

You must have had that same feeling as you were building your business empire Mister Schneider." 

"Yes I did. The only time I glowed brighter was when I found Payne. She was as naked as the day she was born, and I said the same words to her that you said to Zoie. 'My God are you beautiful.' That's when we both knew you two were going to be trouble." 

"Why were you naked mom?" 

"Do you see what you started Dycke? Why can't keep your mouth shut." 

"It was your mother's doing. She set me up." 

"Don't you two change the subject; why were you naked mom?" 

"It was your father's fault." 

"It was not, it was your uncle's fault." 

"After all this time, you two can't agree on whose fault it was?" 

Dycke said, "Zoie, it was my eighteenth birthday party. My parents invited all their friends to our house for the inside party. I invited the few friends I had for the teenage party that was being held outside. One of the people that came was your Uncle Steve. That year, at the State Track and Field Finals, I beat him in all three of our 'head to head' races. We were not what you would call 'FRIENDS' back then. He came over to me and asked what college I was going to attend. I told him I had not committed to any college yet. I asked him why he wanted to know. 

He said, "I don't want to go to the same college you do. I want to run against you for the next four years, and run you into the dust. You only beat me in the mile by 1.3 seconds. I can pick that up in a heartbeat." 

I insulted him by saying, "I hate to burst your bubble Steve, but I was coasting from the three-quarter mile mark." As soon as I said it, I took off running, because I knew what his reaction would be. He came after me with a vengeance. As I was turning the corner around the pool I saw this young woman sitting there reading. I slowed down to avoid hitting her, but Steve did not. He hit me, I hit her, and the three of us went into the pool. 

The screaming and yelling that went on was epic. The young woman kept cursing at Steve, and tried to kill me every time I went to help her. Our parents got us out of the pool, separated us, and took the young woman away. We changed into dry clothes, and underwent an interrogation by our fathers. 

When it was over, I asked if I could apologize to the young woman, I knocked into the pool. I was told it was not a good idea, because if Steve went into the room his head would come out first. Your grandmother said, "I think it's a wonderful idea." 

I walked up the stairs, into my parent's bedroom, and your mother walked out of the bathroom completely, gorgeously naked, drying her hair. I said those magic words, and a few minutes later, we were holding each other and kissing. That's how I saw your mother naked." 

"What was so terrible about that story mother? Why would you try to hide that from me?" 

"Have you ever seen pictures of me before I was eighteen years old?" 

"No mother, I never have." 

"There is a reason for that. A few days after Steve and I were born, we were on our way home from the hospital, when we were hit by a vehicle trying to escape from the police. My face was smashed to a pulp. For the next eighteen years and numerous operations, I was called every vile name you can imagine. I still looked that way the day your father saw me. He wasn't reviled by the way I looked. He said, "My God are you beautiful." I knew there had to be someone else in the room, because he couldn't be talking to me. I asked him if he was blind. He said no. I asked him if he looked at my face. He told me he was looking at it. I wanted to know what was wrong with him, but I didn't see anything wrong with him. He told me he wanted to say he was sorry for knocking me into the pool and he told me how it happened. 

Somehow, during our conversation, the towel I held in front of me moved down to my side, and I was standing there naked. Your dad walked over, took the towel out of my hand, and wrapped it around my body, covering me completely. We began kissing and needless to say, to make that perfect moment disappear, my mother opened the door, and asked me if I want my clothes. What was I going to say, "No." 

It was the first kiss for both of us. The next day we did a lot more than kiss, but our clothes stayed on. 

My face looked like chopped meat, run through a cheese grater that was left out in the sun to dry, but your father still loved me. We knew one day the doctors would be able to do something with my face, but the outcome was never a sure thing. When I went to Duke to have it done the only sane person there was your father. He drove me crazy, but that was part of his plan. If I couldn't think of the operation, I couldn't get nervous. He would show up at the hospital in the early morning hours, and do very nasty things to me. I would wake up in the morning and not remember if it was a dream or if it was the real thing. I would wake up perfectly clean, my underwear would be on properly, and the hospital nightgown would be tied just the way I tied it the night before. 

One particular day he even walked in with my father and his side. I knew he was with me the night before, I just knew it. My father said it was not possible. He just met Dycke at the airport in his new airplane. I was sure I was going crazy. 

A little while later, when my father left the room, Dycke gave me the eleven-carat diamond ring I have. It proved to me that he just got back like he said. I screamed and yelled after I saw the ring, my parents came in to see what was going on, and I showed them the ring. 

When my parents went to lunch, your father asked me if I enjoyed my early morning entertainment. 

I yelled, "I knew it wasn't a dream, I knew it." 

The morning of the operation, I woke up when the nurses turned on the lights. He was already in the room holding my hand. The nurses had been warned not to say a word. Your father got his inheritance, and gave the hospital a $5 million donation. As far as their administrator was concerned, your father walked on water. 

My operation went well, but not well enough. Every time I moved my mouth, my eyelids, smiled or laughed, the newly attached skin was tearing away from the areas they were supposed to remain attached to. This was causing me a great deal of pain. 

My plastic surgeon came up with two ideas: they could re-do the surgery with no guarantee it would be any better; or they could put me to sleep for a month. Your father told Doctor Sage Wolf before he gave me the second option to stand behind my father. He would be safer there. He was right. If it was not nailed down, and was within my reach, I threw it in the direction of the doctor. 

He started leaving the room and I asked him where he was going. He said, "You made your decision, I'm going to schedule surgery for the day after tomorrow. 

"I told him I had not made a decision." 

"It sure looked like it to me. I'm amazed your father is still standing." 

He told me about going to sleep for a month. He said what the benefits would be, and what the possible down side was. He also said it was not covered by insurance. Your father said don't worry about the money, all the bills will go to him. It cost your father $500,000.00 over and above what the insurance company paid to have my face look as it does now." 

"Nice work dad, mom looks like Uncle Steve." 

"Very good Zoie, when we saw the glass head Doctor Sage Wolf brought into the room, we said the same thing. They are twins you know." 

"Really, I thought mom was older." 

Payne took off her shoe and threw it at her daughter. "You little witch I'll get you for that one." 

"Are you coming to the beach with us tomorrow?" 

"No, I don't want to inhibit you two. Go out and have some fun." 

Gordon asked, "Where is that nude beach Zoie?" 

He didn't see Payne's other shoe coming at him. It found its mark in the center of his chest. 

"He is kidding isn't he Dycke?" 

"He's in love with our daughter dear. You never thought it would happen. I never thought it would happen. I don't believe God ever thought it would happen; but it happened. It will take us a while to figure out what is truth and what is fiction."  

"Why don't I find that answer comforting?" 

"For the same reason I didn't find any comforting in saying it." 

************** 

"We're home, have you ever seen the building this high?" 

"Our home in Idaho Springs is higher." 

"What are you talking about Gordon? Idaho Springs sounds like a two horse town, with one buggy." 

"You're wrong; we even have a traffic light. This is a residential building, approximately 28 to 30 years old. It's well maintained and is approximately fifteen feet above sea level. The maximum height of this building is 320 feet above sea level. 

Our home in Idaho Springs is 13,177 feet above sea level. You lose." 

Zoe pounded him on his left shoulder. "That's not what I meant." 

"It is what you said." 

"I know what I said but it wasn't what I meant." 

"The next time you say something, say what you mean." 

Zoe glared at him. Her father used the same words to her when she lost a bet with him. 

Gordon walked up to her and put his nose against hers. 

"Repeat these words after me: I love you." 

"I love you." 

"Zoie try to follow instructions. Let's try this again." 

"Repeat these words after me: I love you." 

"I love you." 

Dycke and Payne were standing by the entrance to the building listening to the two kids trying to hold in their laughter. 

"It's no wonder your father keeps beating you on bets. I'm one foot away from you and you can't do what I ask you to do. I'll try this one more time, then we will go upstairs and I'll put it in writing for you." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 21



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. The scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

***** 

103. Happiness Is 

The Boeing 757 landed into a stiff crosswind at the Sante Fe Municipal Airport, which made everyone on board hold onto their armrests with death grips. Everyone, except Cassandra Chase, she was busy looking out her window trying to see Christian. The wind was so blustery, no one; with the exception of the ground crew was standing outside the terminal. 

The stairs were rolled up to the front of the aircraft, and Christian still did not step outside to greet his sister. 

Patti was livid, and called him a wimp. 

"You stay in the aircraft Cassie. I'm going to tear that brother of yours a new asshole. Give me five minutes with him, then come inside and do your thing." 

"What is my thing Patti?" 

"You have five minutes to figure it out." 

"Come on Jemma let's give it to him good. That pussy should be standing at the bottom of the steps, on his knees, waiting to see her." 

"I've always wanted to call a man a pussy. I'm finally getting my chance to do it." 

They walked into the terminal and there was Christian standing by the door, holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers. He was crestfallen when he didn't see Cassie. 

"Where is she, where is Cassie?" 

Patti went after his heart and balls immediately. 

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news Christian. At the very last second, she changed her mind, and didn't come with us. Religion got in her way. She could not live with a lie, between herself and her God. We were at the airport, ready to board the airplane, when she started crying. 

"I can't do this. I love him, but I can't lie to God. I could not live with myself if I did. Every time I would say his name, it would be an affront to my religion. I just can't do it." 

I tried to explain to her ever since Noah, and his famous Ark, we were all brothers, sisters, or cousins. Everyone on that ship was related to Noah or his wife. Since then every time a man touches a woman we are committing incest. 

Patti had Christian so totally involved in this conversation, Cassie could have walked into the terminal with a brass band playing, and he would not have seen her. She took a seat directly behind him, and listened to their discussion. 

Jemma said, "Why don't you let me hold those flowers before you drop them. They are very beautiful; it would be a waste to throw them in the trash." 

Christian handed her the flowers, and continued listening to Patti. 

Jemma handed the flowers to Cassie. She lifted them to her nose, and enjoyed their wonderful scent. She wanted her brother 'now', but the look on Jemma's face kept her where she was. 

As Patti continued dragging out the story about how conflicted Cassie was, and how much she loved him, Christian began to tear up. He reached into his pocket for a handkerchief, and realized he left it at work. 

"Would you happen to have a tissue Patti?" 

"My pocketbook is on the aircraft, and so is Jemma's. Why don't you ask the nice old woman behind you?" 

Christian turned and saw the most beautiful sight in his world: Cassie. 

He got down on his knees between her thighs, and pulled her towards him. 

"I am so angry with you at this moment I could murder you. You three cooked this up to torment me. I should send you home, and let you live your life in misery. The only thing is I would be miserable too. I love you Cassandra. I always have, and I always will. Would you do me the high honor and great privilege of being my wife?" 

He reached into his pocket, took out a Blue Tiffany box, and opened it. 

Cassie's hand flew to her mouth, as she filled her lungs with air. The ring was magnificent. The center stone was a large deep red Tiffany-Cut Ruby, surrounded by round diamonds and emeralds. 

Cassie lost the power of speech, until Jemma pinched her. 

"Ouch, what was that for?" 

"Would you please put this man out of his misery and say something." 

"Oh, yes Christian, absolutely, I would love to marry you." 

She pulled his head towards hers and gave Christian a true lover's kiss. 

"Will you take me home and make love with me?" 

"I really don't think that would be a good idea, until later tonight." 

"Why, why can't we do it now?" 

"Mom and dad are waiting for us at home." 

"Christian if you tell me they knew about us all this time, I'm going to shoot you." 

"Why, I didn't know they knew, until I told them I was moving here. Mom asked me if I was running away from you. When I asked what she meant she said, "Don't be a jackass. You've been in love with your sister since you were a teenager. I thought she and Callum were going to get married, but once Callum was out of the picture, and you told us you were moving to here, it was obvious to both your father and I you were trying to hide from her." 

"Did you tell her I'm adopted?" 

"I've never heard mom say so many four letter words in a row that weren't directed at Alan, in my life. Patti, I would be wear bulletproof clothing when you get to our home. She knew it was your doing. She said you did it for another young woman the night she was supposed to get you drunk." 

"It was your mother's fault. I couldn't have done anything if she had done her job properly, and gotten me plastered." 

"I don't think she's going to accept that as an excuse. I would still wear the armor." 

"Let me call the flight crew and tell them to take the night off. We will leave at 10 A.M. I'll call General Morgan and tell him about our change in itinerary." 

"It's not fair Patti. Cassie's not married, and she's going to get laid before I am." 

"We can stop at a supermarket and buy a few cucumbers." 

Christian said, "Ladies that's food abuse." 

"It's not if you make a salad in the morning." 

"Oh God I'm going to be sick." 

"I can tell you've never licked a pussy Christian. You are in for a real taste treat; isn't he Cassie?" 

"I love the taste of mine, and I know I'm going to love the taste of his." 

"I've never done that before, please leave my head alone." 

Cassie jumped up and down, and screamed with glee. "Chris, you are a 'V,' you've never tasted a girl before?" 

"Go ahead get your laughs in now. I've been waiting for you Cassie. You are the only woman I ever wanted. You were worth the wait." 

"Don't apologize Chris, it is the best present I could ever ask for. I'm going to train you until you can knock my socks off. Then you can train me to do whatever you like." 

"Lovebirds we are drawing a crowd due to the intimate nature of this conversation. I believe we should move it to your home." 

Jemma looked at the sparse crowd near them. "I always wanted to be an exhibitionist." 

"William said you were. You did it in an airplane, and on a balcony facing a golf course. I would think you got that out of your system." 

"He impregnated me while we were on that balcony. I don't know what he's complaining about." 

"He wasn't complaining; he wanted pictures." 

****************** 

Patti was happy when she returned to the airport the following morning. Callie yelled at her all the previous night, and on the way here. As they stood at the base of the aircraft Callie hugged her, and she wouldn't allow her leave. 

"You tiny bitch, you've made my children so happy. I should bury you, and Alan, side by side for making me so angry and so happy at the same time. The two of you will be the death of me. Will you come to the kids wedding?" 

"Only if you make it fun Callie." 

"All my parties are fun. How would I make this one fun for you?" 

"Have a double wedding for Chris and Callie, with Callum and Junie. I want to see pictures of you and Alan, all dressed up, smiling at each other, for the first time in history." 

"Susan would have to have a shotgun tied around his neck, and I would have to take a bottle of Valium to stay calm. 

I'll see what Susan wants to do for Junie and Callum, and I will get back to you. I love you Patricia, but did you have to change fourteen hours of labor into an adopted daughter?" 

"If you check your doctor and hospital records, it never happened." 

"I hate you, you little worm." 

"If you're not nice to me I could make you disappear from our government's records, and make you a Russian spy." 

"You would do it too." 

"I could make it your sixtieth birthday present." 

"It's nine years away; don't you start with me." 

"Goodbye Callie, I'll see you in Cassie's wedding." 

They both had tears in their eyes as they waved goodbye to each other. 

************ 

Jemma saw the redness around Patti's eyes. 

"It's not funny Jemma, that woman saved my happiness with Stephano." 

"I thought she was going to claw your eyes out last night." 

"She does have an Irish temper that's for sure. You should have seen her in court the day they sentence her father to jail for abandoning her mother, her sister and her. The courthouse was filled to overflowing with people who hated him for abandoning his family. He emptied his family's bank accounts, maxed out their credit cards, and took their car, leaving the three of them destitute. Her mother worked two jobs, and they still could not make ends meet. The town saved them by giving them money, food and clothing. 

When the judge sentenced him to the maximum amount allowed by law, he turned to his family and said, "I hope you all eat shit and die." 

Callie lost her cool. She ran after him as the deputies were taking him away. She would have killed him if her brother, Doctor Frank Vincennes, hadn't yelled for Alan to stop her. 

Alan Robbins was seated at the end of the first row. He stood up and lunged at her. His shoulder hit her hip as she passed him by, and knocked her down. He hit her so hard she went down like a ton of bricks. 

Everyone ran after Callie to keep her away from her father. 

Alan was on the floor writhing in pain. He broke his clavicle, when he hit her. When Frank checked him over, he called 911, and walked over to Callie. She was still livid. 

"Who knocked me down Frank, I'll kill him." 

"You're going to kill the man who saved your job, and years in prison, you ungrateful bitch. He's lying on the floor, with a possible broken neck. Nurse, do your job, and do it now." 

Callie's demeanor changed. The crowd moved aside, like the parting of the Red sea, and Callie saw Alan lying on the floor, in obvious pain. She ran to him. 

"Alan, don't try to move. The ambulance will be here soon." 

Alan said, "Callie, if you touch me, I will kill you. Every time you get near me, I get hurt. Vincennes says I have a broken neck. I may never walk again. I may never be able to play baseball with my son. I may never be able to teach him how to shoot you. I would like to show him how to fuck you in the ass, but he has my genes so he will know how to do that by himself." 

Callie replied, "I hate your guts Alan." 

"I hate you more Callaway, and I'm bigger than you are." 

They've been best friends, and fighting like cats and dogs for the past twenty-two years. Callum is Allen's son, and Christian and Cassie are Callie's children. The kids are thick as thieves. They have grown up together like family. 

The two women were so engrossed in their conversation they were shocked when the wheels of the aircraft touched down in Austin. The one-hour flight went by, and they never noticed. They never unbuckled their seatbelts, after takeoff, so the hostess didn't have to ask them to buckle up, prior to landing. 

"Jenny, tell the flight crew we will be here for a minimum of four days. If our plans change, I will call. Stay at the Hilton, and charge everything to the business account. I hope you all have a great time." 

"Thank you Mrs. Valentino, I'm sure everyone will." 

************** 

"Are you ready to go Mrs. Valentino?" 

"Oh, we are getting the first-class treatment today. To what do we owe the honor of being met by the first team Jaden?" 

"Things have been a little weird around here the past few months, and everyone is constantly on their toes. Every agent is a member of the first team now." 

Patti was annoyed with Stephano: again. "I want you to take us directly to our husband's offices. When we get there, I want you to give me your gun. I'm going to shoot my husband, and then Jemma will shoot hers. Every time we speak to them, everything here is a beach day. You go on top of the roof and sun yourself, because everything is so boring. Jemma, I didn't ask you, do you want a gun or a knife?" 

"I want to get laid first. That's the only weapon I'm interested in at this moment." 

"That will do fine, by the time you're finished with William he will die of a heart attack." 

"I wouldn't bet on that Patti. He has more stamina than any man I have ever met." 

"Ladies, your chariots await." 

************ 

As Patti looked into her husband's office, she realized Dycke wasn't lying to her. The mounds of paper on his desk were unbelievable. The paperwork may not have been above his head, but his 'In' and 'Out' baskets, were unbelievably overcrowded. 

"Mister Valentino, do you need a secretary?" 

"I have a secretary, dammit, go away." he said without raising his head. 

"This secretary provides sexual favors at the same price as an ordinary secretary." 

Finally, he recognized his wife's voice. "Close the fucking door and lock it. I'll take you for a test drive. If you're better than my wife, I'll hire you." 

"I will be better than your wife. I haven't had sex in three months. My husband abandoned me, and I'm tired of using vegetables as a substitute for him." 

"I don't want to hear your sob stories. I want you naked and on the floor." 

"I'm shy, do you want to help?" 

"If I get near your clothes, I will tear them off your back, and fuck you in the ass. You will leave here naked, and the only thing you will have on is a smile." 

"Whatever you say master but please don't hurt me." 

Patti started removing her clothes, when there was a knock on his door. 

Stephano yelled, "I left for the day. I won't be in until next Monday. I'm on a fishing trip and left my cell phone with you. I can't be reached at all. Is that understood?" 

"Yes Mister Valentino, I was just bringing you your lunch." 

"That's fine, I'm sorry I yelled. Please eat it, or give it to someone else who's hungry. I'll leave the money on your desk." 

"You already paid me Mister Valentino. I have your change." 

"Put it in your desk until next week. Thank you, and don't bother me for the rest of the day please." 

"Yes Mr. Valentino, I'll take care of it. It's nice to have you back in town Mrs. Valentino; it's the only time he perks up." 

"Doris, take the rest of the day off. Close the front door and lock it. We don't want to scare anyone passing by." 

**************** 

"Now, where was I Stephano?" 

"Naked, you're still not naked." 

"I'm going to be naked in thirty seconds. What am I supposed to do with a fully clothed male?" 

"You'll find out after I blindfold you." 

As she took off her panties, his mouth fell open. 

"What happened?" 

"Guess?" 

"Why did you do it?" 

"It was a present for you, but you don't seem happy about it." 

"Happy, happy doesn't begin to express how I feel about it. I'm ecstatic, it's fantastic, I've never seen anything so beautiful in my life, and I've seen many like that before. Yours is just so absolutely stunning." 

"If I knew this was going to be your reaction, I would have done it twenty years ago. What is it with you men, and a clean-shaven pussy? It's bare skin. It's the difference between a clean shaven man, and one with a beard." 

"How much would you like to wager? The sensitivity around that area is going to light up your senses like they never have before." 

"Prove it. I'll bet you a thousand dollars you're wrong." 

"This will be the easiest money I've made since college." 

"I have to tell you about Christian and Callie Chase." 

"Stop distracting me and get in my fucking chair." 

Patti went to sit in his chair when he stopped her. 

"Not that way baby, this way." 

Patti screamed as he twisted her body around putting her head and shoulders on the seat, her back against the rear of his chair, while leaving her legs flailing in the air. 

"What kind of position is this Steph? Are you trying to kill me? I can't understand what you're going, or planning to do to me. Remember I have a gun, and I will use it." 

Stephano stood behind his chair. "I'm going to blindfold you. Kiss me, and shut up." 

"They kissed, and she fell silent." 

He moved her legs into a lateral split, and lowered his mouth to her vagina. He assaulted her sex, with the full fury of his tongue, teeth, nose, lips, and fingers. 

Patti attempted to keep her screaming down to a level where only humans could hear it, but she failed miserably. It seemed like an eternity since they were together, and as his tongue touched the entrance to her vagina, and his teeth scraped along her exposed clitoris, she exploded. Her scream was above the top of the audible human scale, and the patrol dogs howled. 

He moved his mouth away from her opening, and attacked her flesh around it with his mouth and hands. As his attack continued, it felt as if he was trying to remind her that every square inch of her body belonged to him and him alone. 

When his mouth focused on the newly deforested areas, she realized Steph was right. The newly exposed flesh was much more sensitive and responsive than that of the areas surrounding it. Whether it was his lips, when he kissed it, the stubble on his cheek, when it brushed his face across the area, or when he nipped it with his teeth, her sensations were heightened. 

She was paying such close attention to these new feelings she was stunned for a moment when something bumped against her chin. She opened her mouth to say 'WHAT', when the object slid into her mouth, almost reaching her throat. She recognized her man's manhood, and began sucking on it. She cherished his two friends, who were higher up on the long stiff rod, and inserted a finger in his anus deep enough to rub against his prostate. 

He groaned at the intrusion of her finger into his ass, but he knew she was not to be denied. He thought he wiped her out after the last two orgasms, but he was wrong. He felt her tightening up again, and went after the orgasm that was hiding inside her. 

It became a race between them. She had him deep in her throat threatening to unman him, and a finger up his ass pushing and poking his prostate. 

He had fingers deep in both her openings. His tongue was focusing on the flesh around her clitoris, and was tormenting her by not touching it. The way her body was reacting to his punishment, he knew she would retaliate by keeping him from his orgasm. She would make him suffer by keeping him on the precipice, with no hope of going over. She did this so well when she was angry with him, and he would not know why until after she allowed him to scream in pain, and dissolve into ecstasy. She was a bitch, but she was his bitch for life. 

He felt the strain on his heart diminish, and his balls move up into his body, and his prostate pulsed. The damn was open, and the vacuum that was her mouth did not let up. 

He screamed, "I'm coming." 

She purposely scraped her teeth against the length of his flesh. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 21



He grabbed her head, and glared down at her, grimacing at her victory over him. His warmth jet into her throat, time after time, and she relished its sweetness. She continued loving, bathing and cleansing that part of him, she claimed as hers alone, until the bastard who is her husband, decided it was time to get even with her, by biting her clit. 

Her senses were still at their peak, and this extra excitation caused her to scream above the top of the musical register one more time. Thanks to the soothing lubrication, which was still lining her throat, she did not hurt her vocal cords. 

Stephano's wasn't as fortunate. His ears continued ringing with that high-pitched sound for the next half hour. Thankfully, there was no one else in the room that had to suffer Patti's wrath. 

Stephano sat down next to her, and rested his head on his wife's shoulder. 

"What did I do wrong this time baby?" 

"You lied to me again. I told you you're not allowed to keep secrets from me when it comes to the work down here. I will pull you home in a heartbeat if you continued doing this to me. I don't give a damn about the money we have invested here, because were making more from the patents then we are putting in. We could leave now and come out a winner. If you were killed, I would blow this fucking place up, because I can't replace you. I want a complete honest rundown of what's going on here when we get home tonight, and if I don't like it you're coming home with me." 

"Patti, I'm not leaving. You can scream, yell, holler, bitch, disinherit me, even divorce me if you want, but I'm not leaving. This job is too important to me and to the people that are involved in it. 

One man has a bug up his ass and wants to tear us down. We know who he is, and we are taking precautions against him. I am not going to run away from the likes of him. 

Even is like a father to me, and to all the people who work for him. Everyone, including me, has been pushing their skills to the limits, and beyond, to make him proud of the work we are doing on his project. The day he went from the hospital to the NEST, to visit them, morale improved 1000 percent, because they were certain he was alive and getting better. 

This spacecraft of ours is going to fly into history. Everyone who is involved in this project is betting their lives on it. We would rather die than give up our dream, because some maniac is trying to shut us down. 

William is our head cheerleader. He doesn't show it, but he feels the same way we do. You can ask anyone from the maintenance department on up and you will get the same answer: we are not leaving until 'The Best Luck' is in outer space, and our daughter will be on that ship making history with it." 

"We will discuss it when we get home tonight." 

"We can talk about it all night long, but this discussion is over." 

"Why do I have a feeling I'm talking to your father." 

"Probably because this is the first time we've had a discussion that I ended, not you." 

"As you wish Don Valentino, but so help me God if you get hurt or killed, don't rest. Keep vigilant because I'm coming after you, and I am going to do things to you that the devil hasn't thought of yet." 

"On that wonderful note, when I get you home tonight I'm going to do things to your lovely body that Masters and Johnson haven't thought of yet." 

"That thing with the chair was interesting; where did you see that?" 

"I didn't see it. I was in the cafeteria eating, and a few tables down from me some of the girls were talking and giggling about that position. It sounded interesting, and I decided to try it on the next willing female, which happened to be you."  

"It damn well had better be me, because if it was anyone else I would have won the next discussion, unopposed." 

"Would you like to go home now? I've had lunch in the cafeteria many times, and listened to the girls talk hundreds of times. Sometimes I have wondered why they don't work for the circus, as contortionists." 

************** 

Three floors down, in a windowless room, Jemma and William were comatose. They had not been together in seven months, and with Jemma's acrobatic tendencies, and William's age, it was amazing he was still alive. 

William told his guards that regardless of what they heard going on in his office, no one was to come in unless they did not surface for breakfast the next morning. 

Jayden told him they would leave a tray of coffee, orange juice and assorted goodies by his office door, just in case they got hungry; but no one would be within thirty feet of it at any other time. 

William said that was acceptable before he closed, locked his door, and attacked his wife. 

The last thing Jayden heard before he closed the outer door to William's office was Jemma screaming. 

He said to Logan, "When I grow up I don't want to be like Michael Jordan, I want to be like that old man in there. I don't know where William gets it, but every time he's with Jemma she comes out with a smile that never leaves her face." 

"Excuse me sir, Marcie doesn't seem to be too unhappy with her husband." 

"I know, and I'm happy about it. William has to be pushing eighty, and I want to be like him when I get there." 

"Do you think he's taking those little blue pills?" 

"This visit was a surprise. The only one that knew about it in advance was 'The General', and he didn't tell me whom I was picking up at the airport this morning. I know I didn't call in to tell Mister Zabo his wife was on her way, so he didn't have time to take a pill to prepare for her arrival. His pecker still answers the bell when it's called on." 

"Well Jayden, I haven't had any in so long, I don't think mine would remember what the bell sounds like. If it did remember, it would probably break into tiny pieces due to shock." 

*************** 

The following Monday the flight back to Albany was interesting in more ways than one. As Jemma kissed William outside the main building she said, "I hope my doctor is right. She said I was well into menopause and I could stop taking my birth control pills. If she's wrong, do you want a boy or a girl?" The moment she finished her sentence, she climbed into the armored SUV, closed, and locked the door. 

William screamed at her. "No more children, I don't want any more children. We have enough. I'm too old to start over again. Did you do this to me on purpose? I have been known to spank you before." 

Jemma yelled, "You can spank me anytime you'd like, but you have to be in the same house I am. I'll keep the bed warm for you. I'll even keep the paddle warm if you'd like." 

William smiled. "You are my life Jemma, I adore you." 

She kissed the window. "Are you thinking of me or my ass in the air as you spank it?" 

"Get my wife out of here before I go home with her, and nothing gets done here." 

*********** 

Stephano made Patti promise to come back in a month since her Stasis Project was completed. 

"You have no more excuses to stay away from me. You could live down here full-time if you want. I know you love the ranch, and hate to be away from it, but I hate being away from you for such a long period of time. Think it over and let me know what you decide." 

"I will Stephano. I'll talk with Doctor Free again and try to get comfortable leaving the ranch for a long time. One day I have to beat this Agoraphobia. It's as if my mother still has a hold on me, and I can't believe that place behind. I know it's not good for us, especially now with the children grown. I'd really like us to travel, but if I can't leave home, how can we?" 

"I know a way to cure you." 

"Where is my gun when I need it?" 

"I have it." 

"Why do you have my gun?" 

"I feel safer when it's on me." 

"Okay Stephano, how do you propose to cure me?" 

"We can ask Laura to stay here on earth, and ask Even to take us with him." 

Patti didn't react the way Stephano thought she would. She became serious and contemplative. 

After a moment of thinking she said, "I'm not sure that would work Stephano. I know Laura would be very disappointed. I'm not sure how our two votes would be counted. I don't think I would mind a new start in life. I could leave all my old memories behind and begin a brand new adventure, a brand-new life. We are not that old. I can't have children, but I know we could contribute our expertise to the group that's going." 

Stephano's eyes sunk into the back of his head. He thought he was pulling Patti's chain, and was hoping to get her riled up. He never thought she would take him seriously. He didn't want to go. He liked his life on planet Earth. He had everything he wanted: a loving wife, children, land, and tons of money. Why in God's name would he want to leave all of that behind? Now he had to explain to her that he had no intention of leaving this planet. 

He took her hands, and said, "I never thought you would take me seriously honey. You can't leave the ranch for more than a couple of weeks without running back to it. I joked with you about leaving it forever, and much to my amazement you said yes. I think that was the bravest thing you ever did in your life, but I don't want to go. I like my life here. Our friends are here, and so are our children. We have everything to live for at our fingertips, why would we want to leave." 

Patti pulled her hands away from him, and smacked Stephano as hard as she could. "I don't want to go either you idiot. I knew you were teasing me, and I let you ramble on so you could hang yourself. You are still the dumb boy I told to meet me on the Verrazano Bridge. I have a hard time driving to Albany to buy something we can't get locally, and you expect me to get into a spaceship and fly into deep space? When are you ever going to know who I am?" 

Stephano pulled her to his chest, and kissed her. "When did you start taking acting lessons? You were absolutely perfect. The look at your face, and your demeanor were excellent. You pulled me in. I was sure that you wanted to leave this planet and go in search of a new world. You complete me Patricia. I would never have been whole without you. 

Our beginning was a bitch and three quarters, but there was always that tiny piece of you that kept pulling me back. Do you remember the day we landed in Aspen? You tried to trick me into thinking you went up to our room, but you got off on the second floor and went back to the flight crew. Do you remember the spanking I gave you afterwards? Do you realize how much I want to give you that same spanking now? I can't do it, because you have to leave. I will be thinking and dreaming about it, until you return to me. Bring the paddles with you sweetheart, if you don't I won't be able to write for a month." 

"I think that's the nicest thing you said to me all week. I love you Stephano, and when I return next month, I'm going to stay with you for one month. If I have to stay on the telephone with Doctor Free every moment you are at work, I will." 

"Are you absolutely sure we can't have more children?" 

"Yes dear, the ovaries are gone." 

"What a shame, another set of triplets at the age of forty-four. Just think of the fun we could have raising them." 

"Would you hand me my gun please." 

"I believe it's safer where it is." 

"It probably is, but if there was even the slightest, the most remote possibility of my having triplets again, you would be the first to know, and the first to go" 

"Darling, why don't you get into the very nice car and head for home. I want you in my arms in thirty days, and I want you naked two minutes afterwards." 

"I'll be at the house waiting for you. I'm not getting paddled in your office." 

"Darling neither am I." 

*************** 

104. Planning and Plans 

Monday morning, the principal of the Zoie Schneider's exclusive private school was advised that Gordon Luck, the son of Doctor Even Luck, and the inventor of the Nuclear Fusion Reactor was going to be accompanying her to school for the next few weeks he was ecstatic. He had everyone on his office staff-calling members of the board of directors, the alumni committee, local politicians, and television, and print media. 

The auditorium would be too small to hold the event he had in mind. He ordered 5000 chairs to be set up on their athletic field, with a raised dais in front. They would be hot and cold hors d'oeuvres for the luminaries that attended the event and a dress code of suits for the boys and dresses for the girls. It was scheduled for Thursday afternoon, at 1 PM. 

He did all of this without getting permission from Dycke Schneider or Even Luck. 

When Zoie and Gordon arrived at the Benedict School, the entire faculty was there to greet them. No one mentioned the Thursday event to them. 

After a general greeting, welcoming him to their school they walked inside and headed towards Zoie's first-class. 

Gordon whispered, "I didn't realize you were such a popular student." 

Zoie smiled and nudged him with her shoulder. "Kiss my ass." 

"I have, and it was delectable." 

"Don't get me wet Gordon; I don't have an extra pair of panties with me." 

"Do you always carry extra undergarments with you? Who is he; I'd like to meet him, so I can kill him." 

"If it was not a him, what would you do?" 

"Well, if she looks like the redhead at the beach, I would definitely want to meet her." 

"You are close to being very dead." 

"You must promise not to kill me until I'm allowed to see, touch, smell, and taste you from the source of what's on the front side of your ass." 

Zoie giggled. "I gave you permission to remove the fabric. It was not my fault that you came prematurely." 

"I know, and I've said this to Monty 1000 times: 'I have an awful lot to learn.' I never took a course in biology, because I didn't go to high school. I can name all the parts, and tell you what they do, and with a few hours of reading, I could probably perform open-heart surgery. 

The one thing I never had the opportunity to do was become interactive with a human body. Yours is the first female body I've seen naked, and I have not seen all of it yet. I have your permission to see it, as you have seen mine. However, I'm saving that part of you, until I know what I'm doing, and I know how to please you." 

"Damn you Gordon, I'm going to walk around in wet panties all day." 

"Maybe you should take them off and give them to me?" 

"What would you do with them, run them up the flagpole, and let them air dry?" 

Before he could answer, the class bell rang, and he followed her into her literature class. 

For the next sixty minutes, he listened to the droning voice of the teacher espousing the virtues of a book called, "The Tenant of Wildfell Hall," by Charlotte Brontë. A few moments before the class ended, the teacher asked Gordon for his opinion on his class. 

Diplomatically, Gordon kept his answer short. "In today's society sir, it's useless material." 

The class laughed uncontrollably. 

The teacher was unimpressed with Gordon's answer. 

"Young man, please explain what you mean." 

"Certainly, for your benefit, I would surmise you earn $70,000 a year plus benefits. I know that is high considering that you are a teacher, with a 'Master's Degree', either in English, or in Education. May I take a poll of your class?" 

"Yes you may." 

"How many of you plan on becoming teachers?" 

No one raised a hand. 

"Sir, teachers start out at a salary just above the poverty line and after thirty years of service they reached the top of the scale earning $75,000 per year. An accountant, graduating in the middle of his class, has a starting salary in the area of $50,000, and works his way up from there. He does not need to know anything about Charlotte Brontë, or her books. He needs math and English skills. This country needs people who can read at a minimum of a tenth grade level, and have excellent math skills. Most importantly, we need scholars in the areas of science, technology, engineering, micro-mechanics, microbiology, and advanced mathematics to keep pace with the rest of the world. The Russians, Japanese, Chinese, North Koreans, and South Koreans are not reading Charlotte Brontë. They are reading Albert Einstein, Neils Bohr, Margret Geller, and Lene Vestergaard. 

Today's world is not interested in what was happening in someone's imagination 200 years ago. They want to know where we are going to be 200 years from now. My father, Doctor Even Luck, and our team will be leading the way, when 'The Good Luck' spacecraft takes off and heads into deep space, less than two years from now. 

Since the beginning of our quest, we have filed over 528 patents. That is 528 new inventions that can make this world a better place to live. If it were up to me, I would cancel this class, and add one of the fields that will help this nation compete in the global marketplace: quantum theory, electro-chemistry, computer science, neurotransmission, carbon science, or fiber optics. If your goals in life do not include standing on the unemployment line, or live from paycheck to paycheck, I wouldn't taking this class. If I wanted a productive career, enjoying what I was doing, while I am help the country grow, and making a great deal of money, those are the areas you should look into. They are the future, not insignificant English literature. 

The students stood up and applauded, until the teacher demanded silence. 

"Thankfully, Mister Luck, that decision is not up to you. A classical education demands knowledge of the past, and the present." 

"Mister Wilkins, did you read Caesars Gallic Wars?" 

"I'm sorry, Mister Luck, I didn't read that book." 

"It was a tiny book. I read it when I was three years old, in its original Latin form. It would have been nice to discuss it with someone with such a high opinion of himself, and a classical education." 

The bell ending the first period rang, and the students gathered their books and left the class silently. 

Zoie grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the classroom. 

"I knew you had big balls, but I didn't know they were that big. No one talks to Mister Wilkins like that and lives." 

"I'll tell you something; if you can you keep your mouth shut." 

"If it's really gross, I will not let you see my pussy." 

"It has nothing to do with that." 

"Go ahead, this should be interesting." 

"My mom loves those books. I tease her about it all the time." 

"You are awful Gordon, but I love you just the same." 

He pulled her close and kissed her. 

There was a shout from behind him. "You two go to detention. You know there's no kissing allowed." 

Gordon turned, as a man in a suit approached him. 

"I'm sorry I'm a guest here today. I was not aware of that rule. It was not Ms. Schneider's fault, it was mine." 

"Oh, it's you Mister Luck. Since you're our guest, I guess detention is out the question. Proceed to your next class Miss Schneider, and do not allow our guest to break any more rules." 

"He is very forward Mister Alexander, and he is very fast. He caught me by surprise." 

"We can file a complaint against him if you'd like." 

"I didn't say I didn't like it. I said I was surprised." 

"Go to your class Zoie, and try to stay out of trouble on the way." 

"Thank you Mister Alexander." 

************ 

The news of the event, featuring Gordon Luck, at Benedict High School was headlined news in the local newspapers, and televisions. It was also picked up by Internet sites that displayed it with pictures of Gordon and Even. Some of the information the Internet sites put in was incorrect. They said 'Gordon was attending the Benedict school', not visiting it. 

Jeffrey, Jim Pierce's estate manager, was in his office, when he saw the article. He printed it out, and brought it to his employer. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 21



"Sir, I thought this may be of some interest to you. This young man is out in the open, and away from his usual protection detail. According to our latest assessment, he is integral to their program. He might not be as important to you and Mister Silver, as Mister Zabo's son, Patrick, but he might bring a very high price. 

There is an event scheduled for Thursday. They are expecting 5000 people to attend. Noone in their right mind would start a firefight, with that many possible casualties nearby. The police will have no choice but to let us take him without incident." 

"Excellent Jeffrey, I'll show this to William. Call the flight crew and have them preflight aircraft number seven." 

"Aircraft number seven, sir?" 

"Yes, this is going to be a one-way trip for that aircraft. When the authorities board the aircraft looking for clues, it is going to explode." 

"Oh my, it would be quite a disaster sir." 

"Terrible, just terrible; they are our bravest and finest young men." 

************ 

"Holy Shit, call the general tell him I'm on my way with an intercept." 

Lucius heard Ray yell he had an intercept, and was five feet behind him when he entered the general's office. 

"Who invited you Lucius?" 

"Margaret did sir. She said it was time for us to get our tuxedos measured." 

"I'll talk to you later Margaret." 

"Thank you darling." 

"What does the intercept have to say sir?" 

"I don't know. I was interrupted, as soon as it was handed to me." 

"Would you like me to read it to you while you find your glasses?" 

"I don't wear glasses Lucius." 

"When did you change to contacts sir?" 

"Would you shut up so I can read this please?" 

Lucius watched his general's face change as he read the intercept. Something was terribly wrong. He waited for his orders, and they weren't long in coming. 

"Lucius take seven fully armed agents; get to Austin for a three day assignment. There will be a private jet waiting for you." 

"What's going on general?" 

"The vice president is going to try to snatch Gordon Thursday." 

"Why Thursday, what's so special about that day. Is he going to be at the beach, or the ballgame?" 

"No, the principal of the school Zoie Schneider attends announced to the newspapers that he's there and is going to give a speech to the board of directors, the Alumni Association, and the Who's Who of the area. Five thousand people are supposed to attend. One fucking hand grenade would keep the cops at bay, while they took a Gordon." 

"Lucius take the best seven we have and get there. Coordinate with their people and try to stop this from happening." 

"Sir, the way they've been training, I would throw their names into a hat and take the first seven names called." 

"That's good to hear Lucius." 

"As he was about to leave the office he stopped, turned around, and looked at the general." 

"I've seen that look before Lucius; what's going on in that head of yours?" 

"It's just a thought general, but it's a terrifying one. If they don't see Gordon on the dais, they could get pissed. They could cause havoc by opening fire on the police, and audience. Depending on how many members of the op force there are, we could have one thousand people dead or injured. I could see the vice president dancing on the graves." 

"What can we do about it without tipping our hand that we have someone inside?" 

"We can have the school move the affair to Wednesday at 4 P.M., and get in touch with all their alumni and guests by email or telephone. Announce the change publicly at 8 AM, over the wire services television and radio. The op force will not be able to make their changes, and get their people here in time to set up, and cause any damage." 

"Brilliant Lucius, brilliant just add one more thing to really fuck them up. Add that Gordon will be doing it by teleconference from a military C5 aircraft on its way to Switzerland. He has been asked to give a lecture to the scientists at the prestigious C.E.R.N. Institute in Switzerland, where he will be awarded a medal for his invention. It will be easy to set up the conference from here." 

Lucius laughed. "General, you are getting as sneaky, and as evil as I am." 

"I will accept sneaky Lucius, but I have never known anyone, that can be as evil as you are." 

"Thank you sir, I accept that as my highest honor." 

As he was leaving the office Lucius said, "I can't do my fitting today Margaret. I have some evil and sneaky work to do. Dan is available. Why don't you go to his fitting with him? When he's finished, have him take you to lunch at a restaurant with tablecloths, cloth napkins, and real silverware. You will have to show him which forks to use, and to keep his elbows off the table. If you start to train him now, it will be easier, when he buys you the new house." 

"So help me God Lucius, the next time I see you, I'm going to kill you." 

"Dan if you kill Lucius, who will you use as your best man?" 

"I don't want either of you to talk to me. If it's anything important put it in writing, and mail it to me." 

He didn't receive an answer. 

He yelled, "Did you two hear me?" 

"We are writing down our answers. I will take them to the post office this evening. You should receive our answers in Friday morning's mail." 

"When you are finished writing your answers, hand them to me." 

"That's not what you told us to do." 

"In the Army, you always follow your last order. Follow my last order Margaret." 

"I won't do it, unless you marry me." 

"I'm going to send you back to Pennsylvania." 

"Go ahead, Dan, it will be the last time you get your retirement check sent to the correct bank, or the correct bank account number." 

"I hate you Margaret." 

"You will regret you said that to me Dan. You better apologize before I pick up the phone." 

"Why, who are you going to call?" 

"I'm going to call Boyer, Pennsylvania and speak to a friend of mine in the computer division. It seems you've been overpaid for several years, and the government wants their money back. You should be getting a letter from them within two weeks."  

"Bullshit Margaret, you don't have that kind of power. I'm going to call your bluff." 

"So you're not going to apologize for saying 'you hate me?'" 

"I hate you Margaret." 

"Thank you general, I have to make a phone call." 

"Enjoy yourself Margaret." 

Lucius said, "Remember general: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." 

"Lucius leave now." 

"Yes sir. Don't disturb Margaret, she's on the phone." 

*************** 

"General Morgan, Mister Schneider is on line six." 

"Hello Dycke, did you get the full brief, or just a headline?" 

"They gave me the full brief Dan. I can't believe the principal did this. I'm going to have his ass fired. The school has a confidentiality clause for all its students. Zoie and Gordon are out of class and on their way to my home. They are covered; no one can get near them." 

"Does anyone at the school know they are engaged?" 

"I don't know. I do know Zoie did not wear her engagement ring to school this morning. I will ask her if she mentioned it to anyone. If she did she becomes a target full-time, doesn't she?" 

"You know the answer to that as well as I do Dycke. I would draw and quarter that principal, before I killed and fired him. He has no idea what he's done. He's put five thousand influential people in danger. They could sue the school for negligence, and win. 

My second in command, Colonel Lucius Canyon is on his way to Austin now. He will be in Charleston, in about 4 ½ or 5 hours. Have the head of your protection detail and some of his people meet them at the airport to go over the ground rules. Lucius likes to work alone. Tell your team leader that in advance so there is no fighting between the good guys. 

When I tell you Lucius is the best there ever was, believe me. I had him kicked out of the service, because he gets the job done, but he never obeyed the rules. 

"He sounds more like a British SAS than an American infantry Colonel." 

"It's a very apt description of him. The Brits don't mind when their Special Air Service teams go a little above and beyond board to get information that will help their infantry. 

From the day Lucius graduated West Point, he was different. He had a different mindset than every other graduate. I will paraphrase the way he explained it to the Disciplinary Board, as I was trying to get him kicked out of the service. He was his own worst enemy while he testified under oath. The Army does not like mavericks. We like order. Everything has a box, and you have to fit into that box. Lucius never did, but his commanders always loved him, because his jobs always got done, and in record time. 

For his opening statement he said to the Hearing Board, as he pointed to the sixty of his men who came to support him, "These men do not belong to the Army; these are my men. I trained each one of them individually, and in groups. They know how to fight only one way, my way, not the Army way, but my way. They follow my orders, they use my tactics, and they follow me. They don't follow my sergeants they follow me. A good officer should always lead from the front, not from the rear. You can't see, feel, or know what the enemy is thinking from behind your soldiers. You don't know what your soldiers are feeling, smelling, seeing, tasting, hearing, or sensing, if you're not in the fight with them. 

If you are eating hot food, and sleeping on a dry cot thirty miles from the front, and your soldiers are eating MRE's, and standing guard in the rain, you have a totally different perspective of what's going on with the enemy. 

When you receive a prisoner in the rear area, and you want to interrogate him, you sit him in a chair, you give him a smoke, and you're nice to him. You have all the time in the world. 

When I get a prisoner at the front line, I want everything he knows, and I want to know it now. The prisoner is going to hurt, and I am going to be the one that hurts him. I am the officer. It is my job. It is my responsibility to keep my men safe, and battle ready. This person entered my safe zone, holding a weapon, with the intention of killing me, or one of my men. He will not be allowed to hurt anyone ever again. He will swear, before his god, he will never raise a weapon in anger at another person for the rest of his natural life. When I am finished interrogating him, I will know everything he knows, including the size of his grandmother's shoes. 

The Russians used a very effective interrogation method of interrogation when they invaded Afghanistan. They would take two men, and tie them to chairs, facing one another. They would take a rasp and start sawing one of the men's teeth down, while the other man watched. They wouldn't stop until the man's jawbones were showing, or the man who was watching answered every question the interrogator asked him. 

I don't carry a rasp with me, so I improvised. I used anything that was available. I don't waste ammunition, or use anything that is issued to me by the United States government. I use what the enemy brought with them to kill my men, or other members of the United States military. I will work my ass off to keep that from happening. If I have to kill fifty of them, to save one of us, fifty of them are going to die. We didn't ask to come here. We were asked to help a country who was in trouble, and unable to sustain itself from attacks by an outside forces. 

If the politicians in Washington would take the gloves off us, we could be out of here in three months. Someone should tell them they don't know how to fight a war. Allow them to sign the documents, call the Pentagon, and tell us where to go. Then they should congratulate each other on a job well done, go to lunch, and forget about us, until we call them and tell them that their problem has been taken care of in a satisfactory manner. 

They shouldn't be allowed to tell us, we are not allowed to fight on Tuesday afternoon, between three and seven, because some holy guy is going to be passing by. Let us do what we do best and get the job done quickly and efficiently. Fewer people will die that way, and most of them that do will be the bad guys. 

Many high-ranking officers have praised my work and the work of my men. They have given us the Unit Battle Citation and put medals on my soldiers and my chest. We received these awards without any loss of life among my soldiers. We have not avoided any battle assignment. Often, we have joined others, who were already in the thick of battle. This is not a miracle. This is a sign of a well-trained, cohesive, fighting unit with only one goal: Kill the enemy. Kill them all. Show them no mercy." 

They show themselves proudly holding the head of a recently decapitate non-combatant, and our public says 'how terrible of them.' 

If we were to do the same thing to one of them, it would be headline news for a month. A dozen congressional committees would be formed to investigate this tragedy. The person who committed this dastardly deed would be compared to Hitler, Stalin, and Betty Crocker. 

You should not relieve me of duty sirs, nor should you praise me. I was only doing my job. What you should do is find 1000 officers like me to train and lead our soldiers into battle. Our soldiers would be served better. Their Commanders would be served better. The Pentagon would be served better. The Politicians in Washington would be served better. The President of the United States would be better served. 

THIS COUNTRY OF OURS WOULD BE BETTER SERVED, AND IT WOULD BE SAFER." 

I was sitting at the prosecuting attorneys desk; and I wanted to stand up and cheer. The prosecuting attorney grabbed my wrist to keep me from reacting. He wrote me a note: 'He just signed his own death warrant. He's out of the Army.' 

As I thought about it, I knew what he meant. The Army has a hierarchy, and orders come from the top down. They don't come from middle managers up, and a Lieutenant Colonel is considered a middle manager. A Bird Colonel is management, and rarely sees the front lines. It is even rarer to have a "General Officer' in the field of battle, but some of the great ones always find themselves leading their troops from the front. 

General Theodore Roosevelt Junior led his troops onto Utah Beach on D-Day, June 6, 1944. General Omar Bradley led the main thrust into the heart of Germany, and was never more than five miles from the front at any time. General George Patton was considered by the Germans to be their worst nightmare. He was also the worst nightmare to the Commander in Chief of all US Forces in Europe: General Dwight Eisenhower. He was twice removed from command, because of insubordination. Once he slapped an enlisted man, and the second time he insulted the Russians by leaving them out of the speech. 

He was not allowed to participate in the D-Day landings, and was given charge of a fictitious Army the Germans were sure was going to attack at the Pas-de-Calles. He was never at the front lines even during the most famous battle of his career, when his 3rd Army relieved the surrounded 101st Airborne Division in the city of Bastogne, Belgium. 

Closer to our time frame, General Norman Schwarzkopf was the commander in chief of Desert Shield and Desert Storm. He was never anywhere near the front lines. 

General Frederick Franks was in his Abrams Tank directing VII Corp, in what is now known as 'THE HAIL MARRY.' He led the Corp through three major battles. VII Corp defeated Saddam Hussein's vaunted Republican guard, while they tried to make their escape from Kuwait. The Corp killed or captured over 10,000 men. They destroyed thousands of tanks, artillery pieces, blew up thousands of tons of munitions and supplies. 

When VII Corp was finished with these actions, Franks looked to the north and saw Baghdad was totally exposed. There was nothing to stop him from walking into that city, without a shot being fired. 

Franks called Schwarzkopf. 

Schwarzkopf called Rumsfeld. 

Rumsfeld talk to Bush 1. 

Bush 1 said "NO." It's not part of the UN mandate." 

("Oh well, what's another war for Bush 2 to fight. 2300 US soldiers were killed. Thirty thousand were injured and/or maimed for life. A few trillion dollars was spent and nothing was accomplished, except our friends in the military industrial complex made a fortune, and some high-ranking thieves in Afghanistan now have fortunes tucked away so they can live like kings instead of presidents. The exponential growth of the US deficit caused by these two wars is blamed on the Democratic Party, even though they were not in power, during either war.) 

*************** 

"Holy shit Dan, I'm glad he's on our side." 

"So am I. Dycke regardless of how many people you have around Payne, and yourself, it would be great if you two got out of town." 

"I have business to attend to in Glen Falls. Now might be a good time to take care of it." 

"It would be an excellent time to take care of it, but don't go there directly. File single flight plans to several Midwest cities, then to points in Canada. When you come back, find an airport north of Glen Falls to land. They know you fly into Albany several times a year. They may have access to the US Air Traffic Control System, and have an alert out for your tail number if you land there." 

*************** 

Being pulled out of school, without being told why, was one thing, but going home at high speed with four cars surrounding you was another. 

When they entered the apartment, the head of security was waiting for them. 

"Little Miss don't ask questions. There are suitcases in your room. Pack everything you need for a one-month deployment. You are going back to Temple with Gordon. You will be safer there than you are here. Move; we leave in fifteen minutes. Gordon pack your stuff, this is not a drill." 

"Yes sir." 

Gordon was packed in three minutes. Monty trained him in the science of an emergency departure. 

Zoie was another case altogether. She took one piece of underwear at a time, folded it neatly, and put it in the suitcase. She went back to her draw took another one and did the same thing. 

Gordon said, "Zoie sit down." 

"I can't, I have to pack." 

"Zoie sit down." 

She stuck her tongue out at him, but she sat down on her bed as she was told to do. 

Gordon pulled her underwear drawer out of her dresser and dumped it into the suitcase. 

She screamed, "You can't do that, they will wrinkle." 

"Miss Schneider if you say one more word, I will throw all your undergarments on the floor, and you will go pantiless while you're at my home." 

She was about to complain, when she saw the look on his face, and knew he was not fooling around. She folded her arms around her chest and stayed mute. 

He threw the empty draw on the floor, pulled out the next one, and emptied it into the suitcase. He continued until the suitcase looked like it could not possibly close. He pulled the top over it and he was right. There were too many clothes and it, and Zoie laughed at him. 

Gordon didn't. He picked her up and sat her on top of the suitcase. 

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" 

"I'm compacting your clothes." 

"You're going to iron every piece of clothing in there. The wrinkles will never come out." 

He didn't answer her. He reached for the zippers on both sides of the suitcase and pulled him close. He kissed her, thanked her for being the appropriate weight, and threw her on the bed. 

"That was not funny Gordon." 

"Wait until I fill the next suitcase. I may have to sit on your lap to close it." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 21



"Fuck you Gordon." 

He threw himself at her, and his body landed on top of hers. 

"If I knew what I was doing, and I knew I wouldn't hurt you, it would be my pleasure to make love with you. I would also need condoms, because it would not be just once. I would do it over, and over again, until I got it right. I want you to be able to orgasm, and scream as you touch the stars." 

"God damn you Gordon, I need a pair of panties; the ones I'm wearing just got wet." 

"I'm sorry dear. All your panties are packed. You could use a tampon to control yourself and your urges." 

They were kissing when the agent walked into the room and yelled at them. 

"Stop that right now. You have seven minutes before we leave, and you haven't finished packing. Zoie you come with me. Pack for her Gordon." 

"Why is it my fault and not his?" 

"I've known you for sixteen years. I've known Gordon for four days. I know who the responsible one is, and who the impulsive one is. Zoie come with me." 

"She smiled at Gordon, and whispered, "I nearly did." 

"You are a very bad girl." 

"Aren't you lucky?" 

"I will never complain about it." 

A large hand reached over Gordon's shoulder, grabbed Zoie, and pulled her away. 

"You have six minutes remaining, pack." He threw Zoie over his shoulder and carried her out of the room. She considered this demeaning and let him know it. 

He told her to shut up. 

He ran into her closet and grabbed an armful of dresses on their hangers. Again, he folded them in thirds and put them in the second suitcase. There was more room. He went back and grabbed her shoes. Did she ever have shoes? Gordon took four pair of sneakers, a pair of flip-flops, and two pair of dress shoes, threw them into the suitcase, and zipped it closed. 

He opened the third suitcase, entered her closet again, and grabbed tops, shorts, and bathing suits (all bikinis), and it was only half-full. He couldn't imagine what was missing. He checked her night table was full of girly stuff, so he threw it into the suitcase. He knew she would hate me for this, but her schoolbooks were put the in the suitcase to fill it up, and close it. 

What was I missing? I went back into her closet one more time and did a mental check of everything she would need. Then I realized what I forgot: nightgowns. How stupid could you get? Many were hung up, but others were folded. I decided to take the folded ones first so they wouldn't crease. As I slipped my hands underneath them, I realized they were a little heavy for nightgowns. I moved the fabric aside, and I found Zoie's toys. I took the littlest one and slipped it into my pocket. I carried the others carefully and set them into the suitcase. I carried the nightgowns that were on hangers, folded them neatly, and put them into suitcase number four. There was so much room I added a dressy dresses, and closed the last suitcase just in time. 

"Are you finished Gordon, we are ready to go." 

"Yes sir, she is all packed." 

"Completely packed?" 

"Oh shit, I forgot her makeup." 

He handed me two plastic bags and pointed towards the bathroom. 

Zoie was standing there waiting for him with her makeup on the counter. 

"I remember you." 

"If you forgotten my makeup, you wouldn't." 

"How many times do I have to tell you that your skin is flawless?" 

"Don't do that to me. Try to be nasty until we get to Temple." 

"You have a zit the size of a half dollar on your neck." 

Zoie screamed. "Where, I don't see it." 

"You are impossible. You told me to be nasty, and I was. What is the first thing you do, you believe me. What am I supposed to do with you?" 

"Don't ever tell me I have zits. I couldn't stand going through that period of my life again." 

"Are you two ready to move?" 

I grabbed Zoie's arm, and said, "Yes sir, we are ready to go." 

"I don't know who trained you Gordon, but they did a good job." 

"I'll tell Monty you said so." 

He spoke into his microphone, and said, "Okay people, disable elevator number two in between floors. When we reach the lobby, it will be a box in one. Steve move the vehicles into position, we are on our way down." 

With their automatic weapons in plain view, the team left the apartment. With six men leading, three men on either side, and six men trailing, Gordon and Zoie were barely visible. They timed the descent of the two elevators exactly. The team did not take Dycke's private elevator; they took the service elevator to the main floor instead. 

Every camera inside and outside the building was being monitored, and no unusual movement was noted. 

They exited the rear of the building, and got the kids into the armored limousine. It was the same limousine Dycke's uncle sent him twenty years ago. It had been constantly upgraded as time went by. The only part of the car that was not upgraded was the exterior. It was still in pristine condition. 

When they arrived at the airport, the jet was already outside the hanger, with one engine running. Zoie knew something was terribly wrong, but when she didn't see her mother's pink jet waiting for her. That's when she became frightened. Was her mother in trouble too? How about her father; was her whole family in trouble? She reached for a cell phone, but Gordon grabbed her hand. 

"Not now baby, wait until we get on board. Your four left feet could cause you to fall, if you are talking on the phone." 

"I'm worried about my parents." 

"If security is protecting us this way, they are protecting your parents better. You will be talking to them in a few minutes." 

"How can you be so logical at a time like this?" 

"Science is all about logic. That's why your Mister Wilkins didn't stand a chance when we spoke in class. I spoke facts, while he spoke generalities about a classical education. Anyone thinking about a classical education would think about the Arabs, Greeks, Romans, and Persians. They wouldn't be talking about fantasy works, written by a woman who wanted to get laid, during the Victorian era. Women didn't wear panties during those years; they were not invented yet." 

"Don't move until we tell you to Gordon." 

"Do you want me to take Zoie with me, or let her go in by herself?" 

"Usually she goes in by herself, but she seems to be doing better holding on to you. Let's try it your way this time. If it doesn't work, we will go back to the original plan next time." 

He grinned at her. "It seems I'm having a beneficial effect on you." 

"Don't let it go to your head." 

"Which head?" 

That joke earned him an elbow in his ribs, but he laughed at her anyway." 

The limousine stopped at the base of the aircraft's steps. The security detail took up their positions, and the door opened for Gordon to get out, but he did not move. 

They were ready when the agent said, "Go!" 

Gordon held Zoie by the arm, pulled her out of the limousine, up the steps and into the safety of the aircraft. 

The aircraft started moving as the steps retracted into it. The copilot closed the door, secured it, and activated the slide system. He returned to his seat in time to buckle himself in. The aircraft turned onto the active runway, the pilot increased the aircrafts speed to full power, and the aircraft began climbing like a rocket. 

When they passed 5000 feet, the pilot thanked air traffic control for their cooperation, and resumed normal climb and departure procedures. Soon, the aircraft was heading for Austin. 

No notation was made about the climb up procedure. 

William Silver was advised of the flight from Charleston to Austin, soon after it entered the Air Traffic Control computer system." 

His source was very high in the Federal Aviation Administration, and she had no problem getting that information. She faxed him the complete manifest and flight plan for the aircraft. 

The pilot and copilot were employees with eight and five years, experience respectively. There was a hostess on board had twelve years in the company, and the two passengers were structural engineers. He had their names, addresses, and complete biographies. They worked on the spacecraft several times in the past, mainly dealing with load factors on the flooring. This time they were going to work on the medical center area of the spacecraft. 

All of this was good news; it meant Even Luck's kid was still in play. His sixteen- member team was due to arrive at midnight Thursday morning. Every contingency had been factored in, and he was counting his money already. No one fucked him and got away with it. He would get more than even; he would get revenge. He would find out who stole his money, and wipe him and his entire off the map. 

On Wednesday morning at 9 AM P.S.T., Jeffrey ran onto the patio, and did not wait to be recognized. Sir, we've been fucked. They moved up to time for the program. It's today at 4 PM Eastern Standard Time. The kid is not going to be there. He's going to do it by teleconference. He's on his way to Switzerland to get an award from the scientific community. We have to call it off; it's a waste of your money." 

William read the article, and calmly handed it to Pierce. Pierce became livid. 

"How can you take this so calmly? This was supposed to be such an easy operation. Go in there, snatch the kid, kill a few hundred people, and walk away. Why does this always happen to us?" 

"That's why politics is so hard Jim, and you learn to roll with the punches. If there weren't a sandstorm in the desert, when Carter tried to rescue the hostages in Tehran, he would have been the hero, instead of the goat. If those idiots in Watergate remembered to lock the fucking door, Nixon would not have had to resign from the presidency. There are many things that go on in politics, and with politicians that you just have to let roll off your back, and wait until your next opportunity. It will happen. I guarantee it." 

"William, I have always been at your side. I will be there whenever you want me to be." 

"I know Jim, I have always known it." 

********************** 

Zoie spoke to her mom. Payne told her they were flying to St. Louis on business, and then up to Milwaukee. They would probably return home from there. 

Dycke reassured his daughter that they were fine, and they had plenty of security with them. It was one of the reasons they were sending her and Gordon back to Temple. They did not trust her alone with Gordon in the apartment. 

Dycke said, "I trust Gordon completely, and I know he has your best interest at heart. It's you I don't trust." 

Zoie yelled, "Daaaad, why is it always me? Security even blames me." 

"Baby it took you a lot of years to gain your reputation. It's going to take you many more years to get rid of it." 

"I'm beginning not to like you dad." 

"I didn't know Delicious was with you." 

"I have to spend more time with her. There are times I need phrases that are much more descriptive than that one." 

"That one will keep you out of confession longer than any other one will." 

"If you have to go to confession for one thing, you might as well go there for another." 

"I don't want to know what the one thing is, do you understand me?" 

"You have to go to confession; you were the one that gave us permission to sleep in the same bed." 

"I said I don't want to know." 

"I didn't tell you either. I just hinted." 

"Goodbye Zoie." 

"Goodbye dad." 

As soon as she was off the phone, she crawled into Gordon's lap, put her head on his shoulder and was able to relax enough to fall asleep. Her parents were safe, and that made all the difference in the world to her. 

Gordon reached into his pocket, and pulled out Zoie's toy. She had been sleeping for almost 30 minutes, and he couldn't wait any longer to see her reaction to this vibrating wonder. 

If he didn't feel the vibrations, he wouldn't know if it was on or off. He could only imagine what they would feel like on her delicate flesh. He hoped she was wearing a pair of those tiny panties she always walked around in when they were alone. If she was, the next few minutes were going to be interesting, very interesting. If she didn't kill him for doing this to her, it would be a miracle. 

He moved his right hand under her skirt, and headed for the Promised Land. He watched her eyes carefully for any movement. There was none. His forefinger felt for the silky fabric, and he used it to find the elastic edge. Carefully, he moved the fabric away from her sensitive belly. 

Zoie moved her hips, and in a zombie like voice mumbled, "Nasty Boy, Bad Boy." She snuggled against his shoulder, and returned to her dreamlike state. 

Gordon moved his hand down as far as he dare into her panties, and released the vibrating wonder below her pubic ridge. He removed his hand and brought it to the outside of her panties. He grabbed the rubbery wonder, and wiggled it across the lips of her vagina, trying to get them to open. 

Zoie must have been enjoying her dream, because her thighs opened imperceptibly, but just enough for the little wonder to slip inside 

Gordon took hold of her left arm, and waited. It didn't take long. 

Zoie's eyes popped open, and her mind cleared. She realized what was happening, and went to grab the offending object. She couldn't move her left arm; it was trapped. 

She turned to see what was holding it back, and when she did, the little guy slipped down, and lodged itself on the hood of her clitoris. 

Her eyes crossed, and her whole body began to perspire. She sat erect, and it was the wrong thing to do. Then to make it worse, she crossed her legs to try to isolate the sensation. Instead, she intensified it. 

There was nothing else for her to do but CUM! 

She looked at him with pleading eyes to let her arm go. She didn't want to scream with everyone listening to her in the airplane 

Gordon put the meaty part of his hand in front of her mouth. 

She looked at him as if he was crazy. 

He nodded his head, and said, "Bite." 

It was either bite his hand or scream. She didn't want to scream in an airplane at 53,000 feet. She could blow it apart, killing eight other people, plus herself. She bit his hand as she came, hoping she would break one of his bones. 

Her mind went blank for a few seconds as pleasure washed over her. Automatically, her body relaxed and she took a deep cleansing breath. When she realized she also released his hand, she was not happy with herself. She looked at him hoping he was in intense pain, but he wasn't. He was staring at her, smiling. 

"Are we feeling better now?" 

Her eyes were still desperate because of the little toy. It was no longer hung up on the hood of her clitoris. It was trapped on the damn thing itself. It was driving her insane, and it was not doing it in the slow lane. 

"Gordon get that thing out of there or I am going to scream." 

"Isn't that what your toys are designed to do? " Scream like there's no tomorrow?" 

"Yes you idiot, but not in a fucking airplane you asshole. Please take it away from there." 

"Are you absolutely sure you want me to move it away from there? I will if you want me to, but your eyes tell me you want to cum again..." 

"Gordon please, not in..." 

He felt her body go rigid, and her mouth open." 

Before any air brushed by her vocal cords, his mouth sealed hers in a kiss. His hand moved under her skirt, grabbed her panties, and ripped them away from her body. He searched for the offending object, and removed it. It had migrated towards the opening of her vagina, and the entire entrance area was saturated with her spending's. 

He did not remove his fingers. He played in the little trough, memorizing it by using the braille method. Zoie did not move away from him. She allowed him to play in her private garden, where, one day, he would have the courage, and knowledge to remove the fabric that covered her, as she uncovered him. 

She grabbed his shirt and said in a little voice, "I'm going to do it again if you don't stop." 

He kissed her nose, "You Earth girls are easy." 

She laughed and hit him, as she came on his hand. 

He kissed her as she glowed. He whispered, "Messy little thing aren't you?" 

He received a swift elbow in his ribs for his latest attempt at a joke. 

*************** 

They were resting comfortably in each other's arms, when the hostess walked down the aisle. She stopped, turned around, and walked back to the front of the aircraft. She walked back again carrying a can of air freshener. 

"Breathe deep and close your eyes." 

They followed her instructions; they heard the can of air freshener being discharged. 

"Okay, you can breathe again. I take it your parents know you are active?" 

"Yes, we are engaged. We are going to be married between September 30th, and December 24th of next year. Our folks will pick the date. Mrs. Schneider wants a Christmas wedding. I want a wedding closer to October 1. I'm sure she's going to win, women always do. Isn't that right Zoie?" 

"No, it just seems that way." 

The hostess said, "Get into your seat Zoie, we are getting ready to land." 

"Okay." 

She bit his ear. "You owe me an expensive pair of panties." 

"If I didn't do it that way, by now your little friend would be visiting your ovaries." 

"What a disappointment that would have been for you. A tiny 'Rabbit' would have taken my virginity, instead of your big DICK." 

"You mean you are a virgin?" 

As his father before him, Gordon had a lot to learn about women. Among them was when to Duck, When to Protect Your Head, and How Quickly to Do It, when a woman is very angry. 

Zoie caught him flush on the jaw with a roundhouse right hand. He was swollen, and black and blue for the twelve days. 

She was mad at him, even though she laughed every time he walked in from work looking like a chipmunk. To remind him how angry she was at his joke, she wouldn't let him touch her, while they were in bed together. 

His mother and sister would not let him live it down. They were impossible. They must have taken 100's pictures of him during that time. 

His only source of consolation was his dad. 

"Son did you have to become exactly like me? I thought I was the only one that stupid around women. You can't say anything off-the-cuff to them. Think faster, listen to what you are about to say, see how they might react to it, then say it, or reject it. It will only take you an extra second to do it, but you will not have to go to the dentist in the morning." 

"But dad, Zoie, and I are virgins; it was only a joke." 

"Put your hand on the left side of your face, and tell me she took it as a joke." 

"I can't, it hurts too much." 

"You want to get a laugh out of her?" 

"I would love to see her smile at me again." 

"Call Rod, have him come over and file a lawsuit against her for cruel and unusual punishment." 

"Are you crazy? I'll never get laid, or married." 

"If you keep talking to her like that, when you're married you'll never get laid." 

"Very funny dad, even when you're sick you are very funny. Does she speak to you during the day when you're up and around?" 

"Oh yes, she's a very bright girl. She's doing her schoolwork and when she has a problem, who's ever closest to her gives her a hand. We've signed her up for South Carolina's virtual school program to finish this year. We will see what happens for next year. She follows directions very easily." 

"Why don't I find comfort in those words, when they come out of your mouth? I always have the feeling you're up to something, but normally it involves my mother. Now my fiancé is in this house, and I have a very troubling feeling about it." 

"What could I possibly do to influence your fiancé?" 

"May I quote you?" 

"Of course you can." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 21



"She follows directions very easily." 

"You are just like me Gordon." 

"Yes dad, I've had thirteen years to become just like you. That's why I'm always suspicious when someone doesn't answer my questions, and uses a platitude instead." 

"She is a very tactile young lady." 

"Would you like to tell me something I don't know?" 

"I think I just told you everything you need to know." 

Gordon sat on the edge of his father's bed and thought about that one sentence for a few seconds. His back straightened, stood up, and faced his father. 

"That's not fair dad. We both suffered because you interfered, and she wouldn't let me talk to her at night. She kept pillows between us. We could've rectified the situation, if we could have talked." 

"You could have talked any time you wanted, but both of you have hormones running through your bodies like express trains. Once that connection is made, the important talking disappears, and your body talking begins. You two need to go for a walk, a lot of walks, and talk about your future together. 

"Is she sure she wants to give up all the luxuries she could have here, to live the Spartan lifestyle, wherever we are going to live in." 

She made that decision because she is enthralled with you. It is a very big step. It might be a good idea for you to take her to work just to see what's going on. Maybe this time she can actually get to see 'The Good Luck', and you won't have to play hero for her." 

"I told you they weren't in bed fooling around with one another Zoie. Sometimes men are able to hold a discussion and it's not about sports." 

"You wrong dear, I was telling Gordon about the 1937 Army-Notre Dame game. It was a classic." 

"Did you listen to it on the radio, or watch it on television?" 

"Neither, I played in it. I was the right guard." 

"Gordon step aside. I'm about to send your father back to the hospital. I think he's gone crazy." 

"Mom, if you're only thinking dad has gone crazy now, we are going to have to put you in an adjoining room. Dad has been crazy since the day I met him on the way to Fairbanks. Who else tells a kid he is a multimillionaire, because he dares talk to his mother." 

Zoie asked, "He really did that?" 

Jennifer nodded her head. "It was one of the nicer things he did over that eight hour flight. The only thing I didn't know was the size of his cock, and if I did I probably wouldn't have married him, I would've run away screaming. No one has anything that big, except elephants." 

Zoie smiled at me. 

I preempted her. "He's my stepfather; unfortunately I did not inherit that gene from him." 

"Thank goodness, I'm afraid of what you do have." 

Jennifer took Zoey by the shoulders. "Have you two ummm...?" 

"Mom that's none of your business, but no we haven't. I still have research to do. When we are ready, we will make love on the kitchen table during dinner. You can even have an overhead camera if you want. You won't have to listen at our bedroom door, with a recording device, to replay it for our children, and future generations." 

"Wiseass!" 

I took Zoie by the hand, and pulled her into the hallway. "Ms. Schneider, you and I have to talk." 

"I don't want to talk to you." 

"In that case you have two choices: you can call your parents to see if it is safe for you to go home. On the other hand, I will move across the street, and live with my sister, until you do. You can keep the ring, but our engagement is off. I have told you before, you will lead, and I will follow whatever decision you make. What shall it be Miss Schneider? While you are thinking about our future, I'll grab my suitcase. I know my room is smaller than you are used to; with my clothes out of your way it will give you more area to play with yourself in." 

Zoie screamed, "You bastard." She wound up and threw the right hand at his face. 

Without taking his eyes off hers, he caught it, twisted it, and took her to the floor. 

"Miss, if you ever take another swing at me, I will retaliate. I'm going to put you in so much pain you will not know which way to run. I'm going for a walk, if I get any angrier with you than I am now, I will call everything off." 

He stormed out of the house before his security team realized what happened. The men in front of the house saw him running and jumped into their vehicle to follow him. It took some coordination, but everyone was soon covered properly. 

************ 

Jennifer tried to console Zoie. They were sitting in the hallway where he left her. 

Holding her tightly, Jennifer said, "You overplayed your hand, didn't you?" 

"All I said was I wasn't ready to talk." 

"All he said was 'You are a Virgin', and eight days later he still looks like a chipmunk." 

Angrily she said, "He knows I'm a virgin." 

"Yes he does doesn't he? He saved your life by putting his body between yours and a trained CIA killer. He makes a joke about your sexual status, and you take it seriously. How can you possibly do that to the man you love?" 

"I don't know. I was a little charged up, and I guess I overreacted." 

"Would you like to explain what you mean by you were charged up? Were you two arguing on the plane? Did it have anything to do with your being pulled out of school?" 

Zoey turned bright red and did not answer. 

"Oh, since you said you didn't do that yet, you were doing something close, weren't you?" 

"If my mother asked me questions like this, I would jump off the balcony." 

"I had the same effect on Delicious when she was just a little older than you. I guess there's something about me that says she was a wild child. You can talk to her." 

"Gordon, Richard, and Holden, are your children, and you were a wild child?" 

"God plays tricks on all of us doesn't She?" 

"God is a He." 

"I feel so sorry for you." 

"Why do you feel sorry for me?" 

"So many of the things you've learned growing up in this world are going to be turned upside down between today and the day we leave this earth. You don't have to take my word for it, but you will find out soon enough, that God is a Woman. 

From the earliest sources of written history through the Bible, there are so many hints at it and they were all turned upside down because men were the only ones who were allowed to learn to read and write. They wrote down what they wanted and they wanted women to be subservient to them. Therefore, God could not possibly be a woman so they changed her into a man. Only a woman can give birth, and in the earliest forms of writing, it always states that God gave birth to the animals of the land, to the fish of the sea, to the stars of the sky, and to man and woman. If you look at the ancient artifacts that date back nearly a hundred thousand years, you see all of the idols are made to look like women, not men. Men were the carvers, and they carved women idols. If God is a man, why wouldn't they have carved idols that resembled men?" 

Even yelled, "Jennifer she has too much on her mind right now. She's only sixteen, let her grow up." 

"Newton and Teddy are going to knock her socks off." 

"If and when it happens it will happen, but let it go for now." 

"Would you like some comfort food Zoie?" 

"No, I just want him to come home so I can tell him I'm sorry." 

"I'll find out where he is, and see if they can get him back here for you." 

******************** 

It was after 11 PM when Gordon walked through the front door in the house was eerily quiet. He went to the bathroom took a shower, and with a towel around his waist walked into the bedroom, grabbed his robe, and a pillow, and lay down on the floor. A few seconds later, another pillow found its way to the floor, along with a girl he knew. 

He said, "I thought you didn't want to talk." 

She said, "I still don't want to talk." Her hands untied his robe. Her left hand slipped inside the warm robe, and found him. 

"Honestly Zoie, we have a lot of things to talk about." 

She pulled on him, slowly and effectively. She asked, "Will Saturday morning be soon enough, or are you sending me home?" 

As he continued to grow in her hand, he asked, "Do you want to go home, or do you want a life with me?" 

"If it were up to me, we would be making love now. As long as you will have me, I will be with you." 

He turned until they were nose to nose. "You are not allowed to leave me, ever. I am not allowed to leave you, ever. There is only one thing that will be a cause of action for us to get a divorce: Hitting! There will be no more hitting. I will never hit you. I do not want you to hit me. Okay?" 

"Your parents do it; and my parents do it. There must be something to it." 

"That's not hitting, that's spanking. It's totally different." 

"Someone's head is becoming very sticky. Would you like to return to bed?" 

"No I don't think I have enough time." 

"Let me take a look just to be sure." 

"That might not be a good idea." 

"It will just be a quick look. It won't hurt." 

Zoie pulled his robe apart, and there he was, twice as long as her hand and half again as round. She moved over him in an attempt to grab his towel and she accidentally found herself with her knees nearly 18 inches away from either of his ears. 

Gordon said, "Hello!" 

She felt his fingers probing. "I'm not wearing any, because you ripped them in the airplane. When you replace them, I will resume my normal attire. 

He kissed the junction of her thighs, and pulled her lower to make it easier on his neck. 

As he began delighting in her garden, he said, "Don't you dare!" 

*********** 

Zoie couldn't understand her problem. The more she licked it to keep it dry, the more liquid poured out from the top, just like a volcano ready to eject more lava. 

Gordon found something so interesting to do; he stopped talking to her and tended to her garden. 

She was on her own attempting to figure out this scientific anomaly. His hips were moving, and he was groaning, but she was sure it had to do with where his head was, and his head was servicing her well. 

That could be the answer to her problem. This thing she must be an oil well and something must be stuck inside. Something was in the pipe causing Gordon to be in pain. That's why he was groaning. What ever it was she had to fix it, for Gordon sake. She had solved the problem. 

"She was going to 'Blow Gordon's Well!'" 

As she looked over the device, it had a opening on the top for her to blow air into. God thought of everything. A handle and a blowhole, just like a whale. It was a perfect arrangement for her mouth to fit over. Her hands could hold on this slippery surface, while she mimicked what she saw other oil wells do to get oil to the surface. She had to hurry, because she had this feeling in her belly that Gordon was going to bring in her well very soon. 

She changed the angle of her neck to accommodate the angle of his Oil Well. She closed her mouth around the neck of the well, and something must have gone wrong, because Gordon screamed. 

She opened her mouth. She thought, "When her mouth was closed Gordon was in pain. When it was open, he was fine. When she licked the fluid that came out of the hole on top, he was fine. It must be her teeth. Teeth were like gears. If gears did not mesh properly, they made loud noises. Gordon made a loud noise. Let's try it without teeth. 

She went down, and up and down, until she could not breathe, and realized that's where the blockage had to be. She had to get past that blockage or Gordon would never be 'hole.' She took a deep breath and started all over again. Up and down up and down, preparing for the moment when she would get past the point, and set Gordon straight. She would free him of the blockage that must be tormenting him. 

This feeling in her stomach was beginning to take her attention away from Gordon's problem. She could not allow that to happen. She moved her head faster, and faster and felt the blockage. 

Her eyes crossed. "Wait! What is his finger doing back there? Oh no, get away from there. That is a definite no, no. We are not allowed to put anything in there. That is an exit. Gordon get your finger away from there. Hitting will be back on the menu tomorrow morning, if you don't take your finger away from there. 

Zoey's mind was definitely not on her main problem. As she was worrying about what was happening behind her, to her behind. Her head was still going up and down, but her brain was focused on the little orifice he was playing with. She would break the finger, and the hand it belonged. With her mind in her rear, her head proceeded down, through the blockage. 

She didn't realize what she was doing as she continued bouncing her face against his belly. 

"Get your finger away from my ass Gordon." 

The feeling in her stomach overwhelmed her, as the oil well deep in her throat expanded, locking it deep in her throat. 

She heard him yell, "I'm cummmming!" 

Her mind said, "HUH," and her eyes Opened Wide a half pint of spermatozoa went sliding down her throat, without the aid of taste buds. 

She got even with him, as her orgasm hit. She sprayed his face with her juices, and there was so much of it he nearly drowned. 

She was so tired from her exertions she fell into a delightful slumber, with her knees keeping his head in place, and her orifice firmly in place over his mouth 

Her mouth remained hung up on his 'oil well', also, until her lungs said to the autonomic nervous system, "Wake up I need air." 

It responded, "Shit baby, you blew the head off that big well. I need some time off!" 

"If you take any more time off, we are going to be out of business permanently." 

"Okay, I'll wake her up." 

She removed him from her throat and took a big breath of air. Gordon tapped her on her anus, which got her to move off his mouth quickly. He breathed deeply, but did not move. 

Zoie looked at him and laughed. "I think you need another shower." 

"I don't know how you could possibly say that Zoie. I've taken two in the last forty-five minutes. One was very delightful, and the other one was out of this world." 

"I think you should at least wash your face." 

"There is another way, you can make like a cat and lick it off." 

"I could, but you wouldn't get to sleep, and something might pop up again. You would never make it to work on time, in the morning." 

He put on his robe went to the bathroom and washed his face as requested. When he returned, the pillows were back on the bed and so was she. 

After some serious kissing and hugging, Zoie asked, "When?" 

"My birthday is the thirtieth." 

"I haven't bought you a birthday present. What a bad girlfriend I am." 

"Would you like to go shopping with me so we can pick out condoms?" 

"Isn't that a man's job?" 

"If you left everything up to a man, most people would starve." 

He didn't consider what happened to him getting hit, especially because he bit her nipple in retaliation. 

*********** 

When Monty and all Janet came back from vacation, they were unbearable because of his swollen jaw. By the end of the second week of their torment, he didn't lose a match to Janet, because he was so pissed off. 

Monty and Janet were very impressed with his improvement. 

Monty said, "He's ready for a man." 

"Oh Fuck," was heard from the ice bath, as Gordon's head disappeared from view. 

Zoey held on to Monty's arm, she was laughing so hard. 

********************* 

It was the September twenty-ninth and Gordon was sitting in my room. I was no longer restricted to bed. I was sitting in my lounge chair when he asked, "Would you like to see mom get excited dad?" 

"You would have to leave the room for that to happen son." 

"No, I wouldn't have to move from where I am." 

"Don't ever play cards Gordon that grin of yours would give you away every time." 

"Mom, would you come in here for a moment?" 

"Is your father being a pain in the ass again?" 

"No mom, I need a favor. Would you please take me "SHOPPING!" 

Jennifer backed up against the bedroom door, and grabbed her heart. 

I was laughing so hard I nearly peed myself. I was finally able to control myself, and said to her, "If you don't want to take him, I'm sure Monty will do it." 

"Even, if you say one more word I will tape your mouth closed. Gordon, we leave in two minutes. If you say one word, you will be dead." 

Gordon said, "Mom..." 

"That's one." 

Gordon did not utter another sound. She had no idea what she was in for. 

Gordon, Monty, and Janet were standing at the front door, as Jennifer ran down the hallway in just under two minutes. 

"I'm ready to go." 

Zoie was part of the plan. 

"Where is everyone going? Can I come with you?" 

Gordon kissed her. "How can I possibly buy you a present if you are with me?" 

"It's your birthday Gordon; I'm supposed to get you a present." 

"You are my present. Today, tomorrow, and all the tomorrow's that follow." 

Janet said, "Get me out of here before I throw up. There is too much sugar in here. I'm going to become a diabetic." 

Monty grabbed her, and pulled her outside. "You're just horny. You need to get laid." 

Jennifer yelled, "Monty, the children." 

"Get your head out of your ass Jen. You already talked to your son about your behavior. I'm sure Payne had the same discussion with Zoey." 

"I don't like you Monty." 

"I don't get paid to be liked. I get paid to protect. Now move your ass before I stay here, and let one of those idiots go with you." 

Jen turned and saw four men engrossed in watching a football game. They would probably kill her if she took them away from it. 

"Do me a favor Zoie look in on my husband every now and then. Make sure he is not overdoing it." 

"I'll read him a children's story, with Richard and Holden sitting on his lap. That will keep him sitting down." 

"Thank you Zoey." 

As soon as the three cars left, the televisions went off and everyone in the house sprung into action. Everything on the counters was put away. All the pictures were taken off the walls and hidden. Anything that was of importance was taken into the garage, while folding tables and chairs were moved from the garage into the living room. Holden and Richard were transferred across the street to play with Newton and Teddy, while Delicious, Gray and several agents brought over trays of food and party goods. 

Rosalynn brought her homemade cake, which had Rods' fingerprints decorating it. Once she put it down, she warned him if there was one more fingerprint on it the next thing would be his face. Then she walked into the kitchen to talk to Delicious, and Jennifer. 

A short time later, Zoey and I walked in to say hello. 

Roz controlled her enthusiasm when she saw me. "Even, you are looking so much better. How do you feel?" 

"I will feel 100 percent better if you keep your promises." 

"I always do Even, I always have." 

"You will have to give me one minute to get into position, but when I am, he's all yours." 

"I'm confused Even, what do you mean?" 

"Zoie, if you please." 

Zoie turned her cell phone around and showed Roz the picture of her husband dipping his finger into the chocolate icing on Gordon's birthday cake. 

Roz was about to scream, when I clamped my hand over her mouth. 

"I'm going to move next to my friend. Have a wonderful time Roz." 

Delicious walked to the far side of the table, along with Zoie, to have Rod face the proper direction. Slowly, I walked alongside my friend, and put my arm around his shoulder. 

Rod said, "Even, they told me you were sleeping." 

"I heard your voice, and I couldn't stand being away from you. It's been much too long since I've been on my feet and able to greet you properly my friend." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 22



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

107. A Death in the Family

Everyone in the main house was in mortal danger, during the two days before Patti's departure for Temple. She walked around, with her headset on talking to her psychiatrist, Doctor Dolores Free, for hours on end. She had a box of tissues in her left hand, and if anyone laughed at her, her right hand picked up anything within range, and threw it with deadly accuracy.

Finally, Dolores said, "Patricia, I have other patients."

"Tell your other patients I'll pay them $10,000 to give up their hour with you."

"That's unethical Patricia."

"I'm having a nervous breakdown, and you're telling me it's unethical?"

"You're not having a nervous breakdown; you're going to be with your husband. Go to work with him if you have to. Sit in his office if you have to, but get out of that damn house and do something for yourself. This nonsense has to stop. When that spaceship takes off, I want you and Stephano to go on vacation to Europe. 

The hell with Europe, go to San Francisco. I don't think you have ever seen the Pacific Ocean?"

"Don't yell at me, you're my doctor."

"I've been yelling at you for twenty-six years, why should I change now?"

"You're not being nice Dolores."

"It's time for you to grow up Patricia. You had an idyllic beginning to your life. You had a loving mother and great friends. Then you had seven years of hell. It's time for you to start living again like a complete functioning human being. You think you have been acting like one, but you can't leave Glen Falls without having an anxiety attack. Your home will be there when you get back. If it's not, you can rebuild it again. The only thing you can't rebuild is your family.

"Robert has a job." I never thought I would say those four words in the same sentence, but it's true. I saw him on the news the other night standing beside his candidate, or was it the candidates' sister? I can't tell them apart.

Laura will be leaving you to travel into outer space in less than two years. How are you going to be able to handle that Patti? Are they going to have to tie you down as she boards that ship? Is that the kind of image you want her to see? Wouldn't you prefer kissing her goodbye, and seeing you standing there waving at her as she climbs on board that magnificent ship?

Then there is always Anna, brilliant beautiful Anna, who will never make a move to fulfill her own life, until her mother is completely happy in hers. She has always been the one to stay with you. When Stephano isn't there, Anna is always there to hold your hand. The only reason she went to college is you forced her to go. She is no different now than she was when she was thirteen years old. She has her own life on hold. You have always come first in her life; she is always there to support you. Until she is sure you are well, and functioning as a whole human being, she will not leave you. You can try to fool her, but she knows as much about you as I do. Why do you think she dresses the way she does when she goes into town? Look at the pictures of her from college: the beautiful dresses, short skirts, shorts, tops, everything was beautiful and coordinated. What does she wear when she goes into Glen Falls Patti? How did you put it: early vagabond?

Have you ever asked her if she had a boyfriend, while she was at the University of Virginia? Most coeds fall in love, at least once, while they're in college. Did she mention any boys to you at all, while she was there? You could have given her a big beautiful wedding, just like yours, and possibly been a grandmother by now, if you set her free. She won't leave you until she is sure you are okay, inside as well as outside. You know you're not, don't you Patti?"

So what is it going to be? Are you going to continue living in a shell? Are you going to keep Stephano and Anna in that shell with you? Are you going to force them to waste their lives as you are wasting yours?"

"You're getting very pushy Dolores. I'll talk to Anna. I'll try to do better."

"No Patti, not this time. This time you are going to do it. I have babied you enough. I'm not taking any of your phone calls until one month from today. However, I am going to speak to Anna during this month. If she doesn't tell me you are in Temple, when I speak to her, when you call, it will be for the last time. 

I will not be able to help you any further. I tried my best, and could not help you with your problem. It will be time for you to seek new counseling elsewhere. Good luck Patti, I will talk to you in a month."

"That's not fair Dolores."

There was silence on the other end of the phone.

She took off her headset, and threw it onto the dining room table. Her eyes and nose were rimmed in red, from all her crying and sniffling. Then she set her red eyes on Anna. 

Everyone formed a wall in front of her, not know how much trouble she could be protect from, with Patti in this condition.

"Sweetheart, go to the argument room, NOW."

"Me, what did I do?"

"You have nothing to worry about darling; my gun is in the bedroom."

"Honest mom, I didn't do anything."

"In five seconds Anna, you won't have hair."

"Alright, I'm going."

Patti closed and double locked the door.

"Do you know how your father and I work in this room?"

"Yes, when you have a problem you don't leave the room until it is settled between you amicably."

"You know what the ground rules are. No question is barred. No answer is out of line. I will start because you have no idea why you're in here. First, I love you without hesitation. Nothing that is said in this room today will change it."

"Why didn't you marry that boy from the University of Virginia, and don't tell me you didn't love him, because I have it from impeccable sources you did. He was the only one you went to bed with, even though you did not make love with him."

"It wasn't the right time mom; too much was happening here at home. Dad was always away, either in Charleston, or in Temple. Laura and you are constantly at each other's throats working on stasis. Someone was needed to make sure you two didn't kill each other. It was always my job to do it, so I came home."

"What was his name?"

"You're going to laugh but there's nothing I can do about it. His name was Cloudy Day. His parents thought it was cute, because he was born during a hurricane."

"What does he do for living?"

"He is getting his masters degree this year in engineering. He was a sophomore and we met."

"You were a cradle robber."

"Cloudy was six foot three and two hundred pounds, when we met. He was still a growing boy, when I came home."

"My goodness, he would have been the first man who could look your father eye to eye. Do you ever talked to him?"

"There's no sense to talking to him. The situation here hasn't changed."

"You just told me a lie, why?"

"I don't understand what you mean."

"Laura and I are fine, and you know it. Stasis, or at least our part in it is finished, and on its way to Schneider Industries for improvement and build-out.

I'm on my way to spend a month with my husband. It's going to be my first time away from home for that length of time. It's going to be hard for me, but I'm going to try to do it on an every other month basis.

Once the spaceship launches, your father and I are going to start going on vacations all around the world. What is there left for you to do here young woman; when are you going to start living your life? I would love to give you a wedding with your sister as a maid of honor before she leaves us."

"If I could believe you are capable of doing these things mom, I could start building my own future this minute. I don't believe you, and I won't leave you alone to do something stupid."

"I want you to get used to this idea Anna; I'm growing up. My doctor gave me an ultimatum today: I am to grow up, or she's not going to talk to me anymore. I've talked to Dolores for more years than you've been alive, and she's more interesting to talk to than you are. I want you to call Mister Cloudy Day and ask him if he still interested in a relationship with you. Your mother has finally cut the umbilical cord, and has set you free. 

If he is, tell him he has an internship available, at Schneider Industries, as soon as he graduates. He better be able to pull his own weight, because he's not going to get favored treatment while he's there. His wife may be a billionaire, but it doesn't mean he isn't going to work for a living. 

I want you to call him, and tell him you love him. You want to know if the feeling is mutual. If it is, the rest is up the both of you. Remember your sister leaves in December, and she's not leaving before you are married. I love you Anna."

"I love this room mom, but I love you more."

After Patti closed the door to the room, she waited a moment before she reopened it. 

Anna was sitting in her chair, with her legs tucked under her behind, smiling, and talking on her cell phone.

"I guess you still have Mister Day on speed dial? You can tell him you will be there in two days."

"Mom, you are such a bitch."

"I take after my children."

****************

"Welcome back Lucius, how are things in Virginia?"

"Miss Moorhead will no longer be a problem for us general."

"Please tell me she still alive."

"We sat down at her kitchen table and had tea. I told her what her options were, and after she regained the power of speech, she went to her room, changed her underwear, and returned to the table. I asked her if she made the correct decision. She swore on the lives of their parents that any requests from the vice president would be called in to us immediately."

"How did you do that so quickly?"

"It was very easy sir. I showed her a picture of me, in my uniform, standing between her smiling parents'."

"You are as clever as ever Lucius, good work."

"Thank you sir, I understand your wedding is set for Valentine's Day."

"Get out of my office now; who told you that lie?"

"I heard Stephano Valentino talking about it with a couple of the security guys. They were asking him where it was going to be held so they could start planning their security operation for the day."

"Get in here Margaret."

"You said I'm not allowed in your office."

"I've had enough of this shit Lucius, get out of my way. I'm going to end this now."

"I'll stand here and be your witness as you propose to her sir."

"You're a dead man Lucius. I should've killed you years ago."

"Did you hear that Margaret? I was threatened for a second time by a senior officer."

"Everything he says to you is on tape Lucius. You have nothing to worry about, except when he kills you."

"You have to stop this getting married stuff Margaret. We are not getting married."

"I did not start it Dan, you did. We've known each other for almost 30 years, and you've played with my affections, since the very beginning: 

'I think you're the best Margaret. I love what you do for me Margaret. There's no one better for me than you are Margaret. I don't know what I'd do without you Margaret. 

You had me transferred everywhere you went, because you loved me. This went on and on for years Dan. You did this, not me. 

How many times did you take me out to dinner? How many times did we go out dancing or to the movies? I expected a ring at any moment, but it never happened. When you never tried to get me into bed, I assumed you were gay. That's when I left you and the Army and got a job in a civilian area of government.

I thought I was the biggest fool on the face of the earth, when I saw pictures of you with other women, and heard you were having affairs.

Dammit, get away from me Dan. I've had enough of this shit too. Those memories hurt too much. I quit. Your retirement checks are in the top drawer."

She stood up, took her bag, and pushed him against the wall. Then, she kissed him.

"Fuck you Dan Morgan; you'll never know what you missed." Then she stormed out of the office.

Dan stood there speechless, not knowing whether to shit, or go blind.

"Congratulations general, you won that battle hands-down. You won't ever have to see Margaret again. The enemy has withdrawn from the field of battle."

"Go get her for me Lucius, bring her back here."

"Sir, I respectfully decline. That's your job not mine."

"Lucius, you are a real prick."

"You've upgraded me sir, thank you very much."

Dan got on the speaker system. "This is a level IV alert. Repeat, this is a level IV alert. Official documents are missing. No one leaves the building or parking areas. Stop anyone who tries to leave. Use all force necessary, short of deadly force. Bring any suspect to my office immediately."

Lucius walked into Dan's office, sat in his chair, and put his feet on the desk. "Well, I'm going to replace your chair; your seat is bigger than mine."

"What are you talking about now Lucius? I'm not going anywhere."

"I give you a life expectancy of less than 10 minutes, sir. Maggie is going to kill you, and when she's finished, she is really going to kick the shit out of you. Dan instead of leading from the front, as I've told you to do often enough, you led from the rear again. You could have done this the easy way, and gone after her yourself, but you didn't. You called out your troops, and had them look for anyone that fit the description of an honest person attempting to leave the building. 

Maggie was thermonuclear when she left this office. I have no idea what she is going to be like, when they bring her through that door. I don't believe an apology, a proposal, and a ring would save your ass this time."

"I'll handle it Lucius. I've handled bigger problems than her before."

"I would put my armor on if I were you sir."

"That will be enough out of you colonel."

"Yes sir." 

The elevator door opened, and the screaming was heard loud and clear.

"Get your hands off me. I know where that pricks office is, and only one of us is walking out of there this time."

"I'm sorry Miss Post, but handcuffs are required under a level IV alert."

"I won't need my hands to kill him. I'll start with his balls, if he has any. Then I will take him apart, bit by bit, until there are pieces of him all around his office."

"I'll be leaving now sir. I'd like to read the after action report if you are still able to write, that is."

"Stand your ground soldier."

"No sir, this has become an active battlefield, and I was forced out of the service. I'm also a three-time loser, as you have reminded me, and I am too old for this shit."

Margaret was roughly brought into the room.

Dan took two steps back as he looked into her dark eyes.

Lucius said, "Let her loose Steve."

As she rubbed her wrists, Lucius said, "Lock this door Margaret, I'll lock the outside door. Call me on my cell, when you have finished with him. I'll clean up the room myself, and no one will ever know what happened to his body."

"Thanks Lucius, now get the fuck out of here, before you get blood on your clothes."

"Yes ma'am, enjoy the rest of your day."

As he left the generals office, he got on the speaker system, "Attention, the level IV alert is canceled. This has been a drill. The general and I are going over the tapes to check everyone's reaction time. The initial review looks excellent. Stand down to normal operations."

As he left Margaret's office, he locked the exterior door. 

"Steve, no one goes into this room, except me. Repeat that to me."

"No one goes into this room but you Colonel."

"While you are standing guard at this door, you will hear nothing, and say nothing to anyone. Refer anything about this room to me. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir, I understand."

"May God have mercy on the generals' soul; Margaret will have none on his body."

No sooner did he finish saying it, than they heard glass shatter.

The two men looked at each other and laughed.

"We didn't hear that, did we?"

"Hear what sir?"

"Call me on my cell two hours after you 'don't hear' the last sound."

"Yes sir."

"God I wish I was a fly on the wall in there."

"You can always replay what the cameras pick up Colonel."

"Oh fuck, I've got to turn them off. That evidence could be used in court. Thanks Steve, I will see you later."

Lucius ran to the elevator, and took it to the basement. The technicians were gathered around one screen. 

"Get back to work. You did not see anything, is that clear?"

"Yes Colonel, there was nothing to see, but she was kicking his ass big-time."

"I want every disc that covers that office in my hands in one minute. If I find out there is one copy missing, and it gets distributed to anyone inside or outside this building, each of you will have to find a profession that does not require fingers. Do I make myself clear?"

It didn't take the full 60 seconds for Lucius to have seven discs in the palm of his hand.

"Where do you destroy your used discs?"

"There is a slot for them in the shredder Colonel."

He walked over to the huge machine and one at a time slipped each of the discs into the slot. The discs were now tiny pieces and unusable silicon and plastic, and there was only one thing left to do.

"Turn off the cameras to the general, and his secretary's office. You will not turn them on again, until I walk into this room and tell you to do it."

"That is against protocol Colonel."

Lucius put pen to paper, and signed it.

"Here is your authorization to turn off those cameras. Do it now, or you are fired."

The technician yelled, "Turn off cameras to room 353 A and B, and lock them with my security code."

"What good is it if everyone knows your security code?"

"Anyone can put it in Colonel, but it gets scrambled, and only I can unscramble it."

"Cute, very cute, I never thought about a security system using a coding system like yours. It's ingenious. I will see you when you can turn those cameras on."

*****************

As the Boeing 757 came to a stop, an announcement was made inside the General Aviation terminal. 

"Mister Cloudy Day, please report to security at gate four immediately. Mister Cloudy Day, please report to security at gate four immediately."

He walked over to the gate and spoke to the officer standing there.

"Hello, I am Cloudy Day, what's up?"

"May I see some identification please?"

He took out his driver's license and student ID and showed the officer. The officer handed it back to him, and told Cloudy to follow him.

They walked out onto the tarmac straight to the gleaming Boeing 757, where the officer said, "Up you go my man."

"Who me?"

Anna was standing at the doorway to the aircraft smiling brightly. 

"Get up here midget, before you bring rain."

Taking the stairs three at a time, she was in his arms, and unable to breathe in seconds.

She said, "I guess you missed me?"

"Not really, I had to put a number system on my door so the girls didn't show up at the same time."

"I'm so glad you're happy. I didn't want you to be hurt when I told you I'm getting married in two weeks. I'm on my way to Savannah to pick up my wedding dress now."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 22



"It's been a wonderful run Anna. I'm sure we could have been happy together. Is your marriage for love or for money?"

"You know I'm already worth more than $1 billion, why would I marry for money. When my sister leaves to go into space, she's leaving me all her assets. It will make me worth more than $2 billion in liquid assets. Then, of course, there are all those pesky patents, which bring in millions of dollars per month, after taxes. I'm not sure if I want to buy half of Sony, or Toshiba. I let my lawyers figure that out after I get Laura's money."

Anna turned her head and yelled into the flight deck, "Jim, you can start number two now, I'm about done with him."

"You are lying and you know it Anna. You love me to death."

"Walk down those steps Cloudy, and back into the terminal. Continue using your number system, and your multitude of women. I thought you loved me, but it seems I was wrong."

"You will come crawling back to me Anna."

"Lay down in front of the wheels of the aircraft as we begin to move, I won't be hurt, but I'm sure you will be. Enjoy your women, and your life Cloudy."

"You always played this game better than I did. I practiced against so many psychology students they got tired of me beating them. I still can't beat you. Why do you think that is?"

"You've never heard the stories about my mother and father trying to get together. It's a tale of murder and mayhem that took years to complete. It included the FBI, Justice Department, the NSA, and several other government agencies that pissed my mother off. Come on in, I'll introduce you to her."

"Is it imperative that I do it now? I'm not carrying a gun."

"Don't worry about it, she is."

"What do you mean she is?"

"She has a license to carry a gun; it would be of no use to her to leave it at home."

"Oh fuck, I'm in trouble."

"Yes, and you're such a nice big target."

They walked hand-in-hand to the center of the aircraft, where Patti was waiting for them. She did not get up to greet him. She looked at him with death in her eyes.

"Mister Day, if you ever talk to my daughter in that manner again the authorities won't find the strands of your DNA anywhere on this planet. Do you understand me?"

"Mom, it was just a game we play."

"Be quiet Anna."

"Answer me Mister Day; do you know who my husband's father was?"

"Yes Mrs. Valentino, I do. He was a member of the Mafia."

"Very good Mister Day, but thankfully Stephano did not follow in his father's footsteps; I did. Anyone who tries to hurt a member of my family gets crushed. If you don't believe me, call the former director of the FBI, Michael Free. He will tell you I caused him at least three of his ulcers, when I took down the other three heads of the five families, including Bruno Valentino. The fourth and fifth members were murdered by Colombian drug families, who wanted to take over New York, from the Italians.

I don't take prisoners Mister Day, and I don't get angry. I do everything in my power to keep my family safe from harm. I do what I have to do, and I don't look back. I am doing it now to keep my father safe. There are still elements in this world that want him dead. I won't let that happen, not if it costs me every penny I have. You will treat my daughter properly at all times, or you will never see her again. No more of these games Mister Day, none of them."

Shocked by her attitude towards him, Cloudy had no recourse but to say, "Yes ma'am."

"Anna, the same goes for you. You are richer than 99.99% of the people on this planet, but that does not give you the right to rule over your husband. If you two have an argument, you are still equals, and each of you is entitled to your own opinion. I took you into our argument room, and that's only reason you are here today. We discussed what was necessary, and the truth came out; but it was not only your truth, but mine also. If you want Cloudy in your life, you have to treat him as a partner, nothing less/nothing more. That's what a marriage is, it's a partnership, and partners fight for the things they want or believe they want. Work it out while you're talking, not while you are in bed. Bed is the worst place to come to an agreement, especially for you Cloudy. 

My husband believes he is God's gift to women in bed. However, after a few hours of lovemaking, he would give me everything in the world he loves, including his liver on a silver platter."

"Mom, that's not nice."

"I'm not being nice, I'm being truthful. I want you two to understand where I'm coming from. 

There is one final thing I'm going to say. If both of you wish to live long and happy lives together, don't ever entertain the thought of naming my grandchildren 'Sunny', 'Winters', 'Rainy', 'Snowy', or anything along those lines. If you do, please have your Will's, Powers of Attorney, and all other necessary medical documents filled out in advance, because I will find you, and kill you both with my bare hands."

Anna laughed, sat in her mother's lap, and kissed her.

Cloudy had the same reaction, and he laughed louder. 

"Mrs. Valentino, now that you know about our relationship does that mean Anna can start screwing now?"

With a shocked look on her face Patti asked, "Anna, what were you doing with all those boys sleeping overnight at our house?"

"Mom, Cloudy is not supposed to know about all of them."

"Excuse me; I thought those games were not supposed to be played anymore."

"You see mom, he is brighter than a lightbulb."

"He better be, because when he gets to Schneider Industries they are going to stretch him to the limit."

"What's going on at Schneider Industries?"

Anna replied, "Didn't I tell you that Dycke is my godfather, and, after a little incestual sex, he has offered you an internship, while I live at his home."

"Mrs. Valentino is spanking allowed, because a person sitting close to you has crossed over the line, with that incest remark."

"Yes Mister Day spanking is allowed. However, you're not allowed to enjoy it."

"I'll do my very best ma'am."

All five foot nothing of Patti Valentino stood up, and craned her neck to look at her future son.

"God, you are tall Cloudy. My husband is going to love you. You're the only one close to his height. Give me a kiss and get my daughter out of here."

Cloudy moved back 4 feet and bent down to kiss his future mother. "I think this is the best way to handle this. I'll keep this distance from you all the time. You won't have to crane your neck to see me, and I won't have to bend my knees to kiss you."

"Do you see what I mean mom; it only took him a few seconds to figure out a complex engineering problem."

"The only engineering problem this young man is interested in now is how long it's going to take him to get his lips from your lips to your pussy. What happens after he gets there is completely up to you young lady.

I have sex on my mind also, and you are keeping me from it. My husband is 900 miles away, and you're keeping me from my only source of satisfaction by natural means. Get off my airplane now, or you're coming with me."

Anna kissed her mother goodbye, and said she would be home "WHENEVER."

15 minutes later, the Boeing aircraft was on its way to Austin Texas. Vice President Silver was informed that the aircraft was en route to Bismarck North Dakota.

30 minutes after they left the airport, Cloudy put Anna's bags down in his dorm room. 

Anna looked around, and said, "We are moving off campus tomorrow night. I'll take care of it, while you are in class."

In his first action as an equal partner, Cloudy said, "Okay."

Having come to their first mutual agreement, their second one was easier. They stripped, got into his single bed, and began to wrestle. The question of 'Would She, or Wouldn't She' had not been answered, YET."

***************

Laura watched the computer display the amount of heat the 'Beauty Box' Control Unit built up during the one year time period Junie was in stasis. It did not reach the critical point by 1.5°, and more than likely never would have, but it was too close for comfort. They could not find a reason for the delayed opening of the box.

Now she was able to sit back and watch, as the chief engineer listened to six of his senior associates tell him how to reinvent her 'primitive' machine. She sat there for nearly 2 hours, without saying a word, as each engineer proceeded to redesign the major working portion of the stasis unit. As with everything else happening with the 'Beach Ball', they were racing against time. After the engineers decided, which unit was the best, it could take a few weeks to hand build the first working model, and then test it for 90 days. This would bring us to the beginning of May.

Praying everything goes perfectly with the tests, Dycke would then have to produce eighty of these units, then test, ship, install, and test them again, once they are in the spacecraft. It would be approximately October 1, when the testing phase was completed on them. We would be severely short on time, with lift off no later than December 25, just 86 days away. 

Getting ready to go into space is very hard."

**************

Laura said, "Sam, I have a question."

"Ask away Laura."

"We were 1.5° away from critical in my unit. All we needed to be completely safe was another 1.5° or 2°. Am I correct?"

"You are 100% correct."

"Why are these men and women trying to reinvent the wheel, instead of putting in a fan, or a turbine to move the air around and cool the complete unit itself naturally?"

"There is a very simple answer to that Laura, that's what they get paid for."

"Oh okay, it was just a thought."

Sam smiled, and called Laura over to his position. He showed her the computer aided design's (CAD) which were being displayed at his station. His computer showed each design his six senior engineers were in the process of completing. Every one of them had a fan as part of the assembly. The engineers were working with aluminum vessels, which would contain the liquids, and gases, used in the stasis process. Instead of being globular, as hers were, these were either square, or rectangular, with spaces for air to move between each vessel. These designs were not only meant to keep the computer area cool, they were meant to keep the entire compartment cooler by moving air constantly through it, and over the cryogenic unit, which would constantly be cold.

Laura continued looking at the new designs; then she shook her head. "They are not going to work Sam."

"You're very funny Laura. I have a doctorate in engineering, and everyone at this table has advanced degrees in engineering. Why don't you think these designs will work?"

"I know I'm a poor little rich girl from the backwoods of New York, with a high school education. However, I've seen the wind move through trees. You have a stack of six 4'Long x 3'Deep x 4"High vessels each separated by 1 inch spacers. These are your main and backup supplies of the helium/oxygen/nitrogen recirculation units, cryogenic circulating units, and the vaporization units for the anesthesia. Next to them, you have the wiring harnesses, piping, flow control gauges, and all the other instrumentation needed to connect to the computer. All of this takes up three feet eight and three quarter inches according to your display. Then you geniuses put in one two-inch fan behind the center of a vertically integrated computer, measuring 2.5" deep x 32" long x 22' high and expect that fan to cool the entire four feet long compartment filled with all this electronic gear. I wouldn't bet my life on that unit working, and I'm going to be in one of those units."

Sam said, "Anthony set up your prototype in the computer, and run it at high speed for one year."

"It will be up and running in about four minutes."

"You foresee all of this, because you looked at wind moving through trees?"

"It helps if you're naked, and feel the breeze move across your skin."

"Can I take pictures next time you do this experiment?"

"If you get my mother's approval, go right ahead."

"I'd rather shoot myself in both feet then ask your mother that question. There is also the possibility my boss would cut off my nuts for doing it."

"Dycke isn't that bad, is he?"

The hand on her shoulder said, "Yes he is."

"Hello Dycke, I'm about to blow your engineers minds."

"As long as that's all you're going to blow, go ahead Laura?"

"I'm going to show them they are wrong, because I ran naked in the trees."

"You are bad girl. How the hell are you still a virgin?"

The engineers tried not to break their necks as they said, "WHAT!"

Dycke jumped in front of her and said, "Down boys and girls, she's family."

One woman said, "Boss, there are certain things worth getting fired over, and being 'First' with a beauty like her, is one of them."

"I'm going to tell your husband Katie."

"Go ahead, as long as he gets laid every night of the week; he couldn't care less what I do on the weekends."

Everyone around her went 'Oooooooooooo.'

"The program is ready to run Sam."

"Dycke, this is the case of your engineers against the naked tree hugger. We'll see who wins. Run it Anthony."

Each day took five seconds. The computer showed the readings in blue for the day on top of the screen, and the cumulative readings in red at the bottom. During the first four months, there was no discernible increase in heat within the compartment. The fifth month there was an increase of one-half of 1°. During the six-month it went up three quarters of 1°, and remained steady from the seventh through tenth month. In the 11th month, there was a quantum jump of 1.5°, and the alarms sounded. They had passed the safety protocol for the internal computer, and it shut down automatically. If this Beauty Case was in space, it would opened automatically, and the person inside would awaken.

Anthony was crestfallen, because his design failed. 

On the other hand, Laura was jumping up and down, like a cheerleader.

Dycke said, "Anthony, the next time you try it, maybe you should be naked."

"I don't think that would be a good idea boss. Everyone else would run out of the room horrified at what I have done to the human body."

"We do have an employee gym, free of charge. Why don't you make use of it?"

"It may make me into a good-looking man, and some woman might want to marry me. It could ruin my entire life."

"In that case, I'll set up your appointments myself. Be there Monday through Friday, 8 AM to 9 AM. I have the perfect personal trainer in mind for you. You will learn to love her, in 5 to 10 years, if you survive, that is."

"Please don't do it boss, I like being ugly."

"Ugly I don't mind, but you are risk to our health insurance plan premiums. Lose the weight Anthony; you will thank yourself for it."

"This has been a perfect day so far boss. My design gets shut down by a naked tree hugger, and you want me to become handsome. What else could go wrong?"

"I could fire you."

"That would take my perfect day, and ruin it. I wouldn't have the chance to go to the gym and meet your personal trainer. You wouldn't get to see how handsome I am when I am 70 pounds lighter, and you would be losing your best engineer."

"Didn't your design just lose?"

"Yes sir, but when the United States tried to enter the space race, during the Eisenhower administration, three Vanguard rockets, designed by Warner von Braun, exploded before the fourth one finally attained orbit. It cost the government several hundred million dollars to get a grapefruit size satellite into orbit. My program cost one hour of computer time, and my daily salary. I think you got a bargain."

Laura said, "Dycke, I like him. He just told you to fuck off nicely. That man has balls."

"Anthony, if you want to, after you lose thirty-five pounds, you can take me to dinner."

"Do you see what I mean boss, it's happening already."

"Laura is leaving on an extremely long journey in a year or two Anthony. You don't have to worry about asking her to marry you, or the reverse happening, because she will no longer be on this planet."

"Okay boss, I feel much better now."

Laura said, "Be very careful Anthony, you just insulted me. I've been studying self-defense since I was six years old. Beating up pudgy people like you is like taking candy from an infant."

"Sir, my day is going downhill in a hurry. Before it gets any worse, can I get into my car, and while I'm on my way home have a traffic accident."

"Absolutely Anthony, I won't keep you here one second after 6 PM. I know you won't need any longer than that to fix the problem with your program, and have a functioning, comfortable stasis box. Come with me people, we are going to lunch."

"What about me boss?"

"You have work to do. I wouldn't want to keep you from it. I'll bring you back a veggie sandwich."

"Can I have a cookie with it?"

"Yes and a bottle of water."

"I am not going to like this, not even a little bit."

************

Lucius answered his cell phone saying, "Is it over Margaret?"

"You better have a detail at the back door ready to bring him to the hospital, I broke his arm."

"I'll be right there."

He said to the men in the ready room, "I need four cars at the back door now. The general is going to the hospital. Margaret broke his arm."

There was laughter and applause throughout the room, as the men and women teams were assigned to their vehicles.

Steve saw him walking down the corridor.

"There's still screaming and yelling going on in there sir, but I didn't hear a thing."

"She broke his arm Steve. I can't wait to find out how."

"One of them should write a book about today; it could turn out to be a bestseller."

"Don't mention it to either one of them. They would put us in front of a firing squad. Stick around you may have to help me get him to the car."

Lucius unlocked the outside door, but knocked before he walked in. There was blood on Margaret's desk, and the room was in shambles. He proceeded towards the second door, and knocked.

Margaret opened the door, and Lucius said, "Oh my God, are you alright Margaret?"

"I've never felt better in my life Lucius. I've released all the fury I've had stored up inside me since I met him. I feel reborn. He's going to need help getting up. My heels did a great job on his legs, and when he tried to molest me, I slammed the door on his arm, and I broke it. I've never seen him cry before, but he did today. I smiled from ear to ear when I saw that."

Lucius took Margaret into his arms, and hugged her.

"You know the old saying Maggie, 'Never get angry, get even.' I believe you did today. You will have to come to the hospital with us. You have some scratches close to your eye that need to be looked at. I'll take him downstairs. Steve will help you down, when you're ready."

"Thanks Lucius, you are a prince."

"Don't tell that to my three wives; they won't believe you."

"Are you two finished chatting, I could use some help over here."

"I'm on my way sir; I was just clearing the battlefield."

*********

"I thought Margaret looked bad general, but it looks like you got run over by a brigade."

"I did Lucius, and that brigade's name was Margaret Post. I've never seen a woman attack with a fury like the one she did today. I didn't have a chance. I let her hit me first, because I deserved it. After that, I was on the defensive every second. She never ran out of energy, and what a mouth she has on her. In all the years I've known her, she has always been a lady. She has never used foul language. She saved it all up for me today.

I hurt her Lucius, and I was young and dumb enough not to notice. I came out of the Academy three years before you did. I was so focused on my career she was just an accessory. I took her along because she could read my thoughts and put them down on paper, better than any English professor. I looked at her as being safe, as if she was my sister. I was looking after her, because she was so young, and innocent; at least that's what I thought I was doing.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 22



I never intended to get married in the first place, to any woman, not only to Margaret. I thought it was unfair, because of the type of lives we lived. You lost three times because of it. It's not normal to be separated from your spouse for a year, or more, and expect to walk back into your home, and resume a life as if nothing had ever happened in between.

How many times have you seen our young men leave their homes, and return a year later to find wives with three or four-month-old infants in their arms.

How many times have you seen our young men leave their homes to wives who have loved and been faithful to them for years, and had to find solace in someone else's arms, because they were so lonely.

I couldn't do that any woman. It may sound selfish, but that's the way I felt."

"General, you have a big mouth, but you're talking to the wrong person. You should have told that to Margaret 25 years ago."

Lucius cut a length of cloth from the blackout curtains in Dan's office, to make a sling for his arm. Once he had it properly adjusted, he said, "Let's get you downstairs, and off to the hospital. I believe you'll be spending the night there."

As they exited the elevator on the first floor, Logan was there to greet them. He took one look at the general and was about to laugh. 

"If you laugh, you will be doing push-ups for the rest of your life, or you will be unemployed."

"SIR, YES SIR."

"Idiot."

"SIR, YES SIR."

Logan couldn't hold it in any longer, and began to laugh.

"Can I hold your broken arm for you, sir?"

"Yes you can, with your broken neck."

Dan's left arm was broken, so they put him in on the drivers' side of the car to make his ingress and egress easier. It didn't matter to Lucius where Dan sat, because he was going to have female company shortly, whether he wanted it or not.

The agents in the car were told to wear their earbuds and listened to music loud enough so they could not hear any conversation that went on between the two combatants. They wouldn't hear anything anyhow from this point forward, because Lucius made it a standing order. They were not to talk about the general or Margaret at all. A breach of this order would be a breach of the Code of Honor that all soldiers live by.

"No one on the outside knows what's going on inside your unit. The ranking officer of the unit is to be protected by everyone."

As Logan affixed Dan's seatbelt, under his broken arm, the opposite side of the car dipped down. Dan turned his head and saw Margaret sliding in to the car.

"Get me out of here; she's going to kill me."

"Mister Zabo gave his approval for that general. He said you were narrow- minded bastard."

"You made that up."

"I would never call you a narrow-minded bastard general."

"If you call me a narrow-minded bastard one more time, you're fired."

"I never called you a narrow-minded bastard, Mister Zabo did. You can ask him yourself if you survive the ride to the hospital."

"This day will never end, I'm sure of it."

************

Margaret slid her legs in, adjusted her skirt, grabbed the seat belt, and buckled it into place.

Lucius immediately closed the door behind her, and stood by it, so she could not reopen it.

Margaret waited for the vehicle to start, when she realized someone was sitting beside her. She sensed it was Dan. She unbuckled her seatbelt, grabbed the door handle, and pushed. The door didn't move. She tried again, and it still didn't move. She looked out the window and saw Lucius pressing up against the door.

"Let me out of here Lucius; or I will kill him."

"Kill him on the way to the hospital Margaret, but let him tell you what he told me first. Do it and I'll mow your lawn?"

"I live in an apartment."

"That will make my job easier. Talk to him Margaret, make my life easier."

"He's a waste of air."

"For the last time Margaret, talk to the idiot. You helped make him a general."

"We all make mistakes; he was mine."

"You may make another one, if you do not talk to him."

"I have my Ted Williams bat."

"I will stand still, while you swing it."

"You are a pain in the ass Lucius."

"We all have one Margaret."

***************

She reset her seatbelt, and without looking at him said, "Lucius wants me to talk to you. I have nothing to say that I haven't said already."

"Margaret, I spoke with him for a few moments before he brought me down here. When I was finished, he said I had a big mouth that I was talking to the wrong person. He said I should have told those things to you 25 years ago. "I was a young and dumb first Lieutenant, who found a secretary that could read his mind, and put it on paper better... ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^... I wouldn't do that to any woman Margaret."

"You were a 24-year-old First Lieutenant, and I was 19 years old private, fresh out of training, when I was assigned to be your secretary. I memorized everything about you: your speech pattern, the way you wrote, and the way you liked your files organized. You never had to look for anything twice. It was always there at your fingertips. You never had to rewrite any speech I wrote for you, because they were always perfect. When you had reports that were due, they were completed, and on your desk, waiting for your signature. There were days you walked into the office and had nothing to do, because I did them for you already.

You made Captain on the first go around in North Carolina. No other First Lieutenants in our Division did. It was because every form you were supposed to fill out was filled out by me, and it was perfect. The only thing you had to do was sign it, and they were always into staff early. Not one sheet of paper came back from command to tell you to do it again.

You didn't care about the Army's fraternization policy, and neither did I. The Army was looking the other way, because they were in need of good officers; and Congress was up there ass about keeping females in the service. We fit the bill. 

We didn't hide from anyone. I thought we were dating, while all you were doing was playing. I was not your sister. I was a woman, and I was in love with you. If you didn't see that you were not only dumb, you were blind."

"I want to ask you a tough question Margaret, and if you don't want to, you don't have to answer it. We were in Germany, and I was a sure thing for Major when the list came out. That's when you left me, and the Army, and came back to the states. For the sake of argument, what would have happened to us if we had gotten married, and I was assigned to the Balkans for the next 19 months, which I was, without a break?"

"I swear Dan someone needs to put an axe through the center of your skull to make you understand. When two people really love each other, they will wait. It will be damn hard, and it will be excruciatingly painful, but both of us would survive. 

Look at all the men and women that fought in World War II. They were separated from their families from four to six years, and most of them made it. They made it through rationing, fuel shortages, and the edge of the depression, but they made it. 

Even today with the long tours of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan, the Army has experienced less than a 1% increase in the divorce rate over the past 11 years. They would prefer it to be 0%, but in the real world that's not possible. How did you become a general officer and not have these facts and figures in front of you every day?"

"I was in charge of Battle Readiness. That stuff is taken care of by Recruiting and Administration."

"Do you think 10 or 12 key officers facing a divorce at home could affect battle readiness?"

"Yes, it could."

"You should have taken lessons from Lucius, instead of kicking him out of the service. You could have taken him out of the field, because of the way he did things, but as the head of training, there would have been no one better. He has me talking to you civilly, where 10 minutes ago I would have cut your throat without a second thought."

"Are you going to come back to work for me?"

"No, I'm going home."

"Will you marry me if I go with you?"

"You can't leave here; you have an important job to do."

"Will you marry me anyway? I know I'm dumb, and I know I've treated you like dirt, but I rationalized it in a way that was logical to me. I do love you Margaret. I think I've known it for a long time. I said to myself for so long that I was never getting married that the possibility of it happening to me was never allowed to enter my mind. You don't have to answer me today, or tomorrow, or even next week if you don't want to, but when you decide, I'll be waiting for your phone call, one way, or the other."

************

After they signed into the hospital, they were triaged, and separated. Dan was taken for x-rays of his left arm and ribs, while a nurse was assigned to look at Margaret's right eye.

The nurse cleaned off Maggie's face, and put a large magnifying glass between them.

"Let me guess, a domestic dispute?"

"You're not even close: World War 2 ½. An army corporal took on an army general and won."

"I hope you were the corporal."

"The general is having his broken arm x-rayed."

"Way to go girl, you're my type of woman. If you don't mind me saying so, you're a little too old to be a corporal. This must have been an old grudge."

"It was. I was like a pressure cooker that blew its lid today."

"Did he see it coming, or did you sneak up on him?"

"Oh no, I didn't sneak up on him. He caused me to boil over today; and I went after him hammer and tong."

"I'm going to have the Doctor look at this eye. I think you're going to need a micro-stitch. I'll be right back."

While she was waiting for the nurse, Lucius stopped by to give her the news about Dan.

"Congratulations Margaret, even though you were fighting above your weight class, he has a compound fracture of his left arm, plus two ribs. How the hell did you break is arm?"

"He attempted to molest me. I closed the door on his arm as he tried to touch me. It served him right."

"What do you mean he tried to molest you? That's not like Danny."

"He tried to touch my breast, while we were fighting."

"Are you sure that's what he was trying to do; or are you beginning to become like him, dense as concrete?"

"I plead the Fifth Amendment."

"Don't get like me Margaret; it's not fun being alone all the time. That's why I keep Paul with me, to break the silence."

"Is that why you got married three times?"

"Dogs don't talk, and cats are too independent. I never cheated on my wives. I was always away, and they couldn't take it."

"Are you saying that asshole of mine is right?"

"No Margaret, not for one minute. If you don't try, you can't win. I just picked the wrong women, or they picked the wrong man. I'm still friendly with my first two wives. My third wife, I stay as far away from as I can."

The nurse returned with the Doctor, who sat down, looked at Margaret's eye through the magnifying glass, stood up, and left, without saying a word.

"Margaret, I have to talk to a man about manners. I'll be right back."

Lucius motioned for Steve and Logan to follow him, as he walked up to the doctor.

The doctor was standing at the nurse's station talking to a secretary, when Lucius tapped him on his shoulder.

The doctor turned and said, "Yes." 

Lucius grabbed him by the nuts, and squeezed so hard the Doctor squealed, and fell to his knees.

Lucius looked around innocently. "It must be gas. We'll take him outside and help him expel it."

Logan and Steve picked up, and escorted him outside the emergency room.

As the Doctor recovered his senses he said, "I am going to sue you for every penny you have."

"If you don't keep your mouth shut, your life expectancy is less than 10 seconds. Steve put your gun in his mouth so I have his attention."

Steve did as he was told.

"Do I have your full attention now doctor?"

The doctor nodded his head vigorously.

"You just insulted one of the most important people in our facility. You know where we work, and you know what we're building. We don't do anything in half measures. Apparently you do. You walked up to Margaret Post, looked at her eye, and left without saying a word. You could have been a bum, who walked in from the street and grabbed a white coat. No one would have known the difference.

We could sue this hospital into bankruptcy, because of you. I don't know your name because you're not wearing a nametag. Do you have a name? Are you a real doctor? Did they teach you how to treat patients properly, while you were in medical school? I'm going to ask Steve to remove his weapon from your mouth, and put it into your ear. I know you heard what I asked you; now I want to hear your answers. If I don't like them, your brains will be scattered on the floor next to your body."

"Yes I am a doctor, Doctor Joseph Finch. I graduated from Northern New Mexico State University Medical School. Yes, they did teach me how to treat patients properly, and I used to be a better doctor than I am. I apologize for the way I treated Miss Post. 

I just went through a vicious divorce, and my wife took everything, including my children. I have to go to Vermont to see them. I didn't do anything wrong, and she still got everything. What the hell is happening to this world?"

"Where does your wife live? How old is she, and how old are your kids?"

"She lives near Montpelier. My wife is 33 years old, and the girls are 9 and 11."

"I went through three divorces doctor. I was still in the Army and I had to function as an officer every day. You are a professional and you have to function as a doctor every day. You can't treat your patients as if they didn't matter. 

Margaret matters to us. You could be dead where you kneel now, because of the way you treated her. Do your job. Do it properly, get back on your feet, and live your life. Who knows what can happen in the future. Go back inside, and talk to Margaret. Tell her exactly what has to be done, and tell her which type of physician is best to do it. 

Don't forget to clean the ear wax out of your gun Steve."

"Very funny Colonel."

"When we are all finished here Doctor, I'd like to speak with you for a moment. It's about a very elevating experience."

Doctor Finch approached Margaret, sat down, and introduced himself. He apologized for his previous behavior, and promised it would never happen again.

"Miss Post, you need a stitch at the corner of your right eye. I won't do it, purely out of caution. I would rather have either an ophthalmologist or a plastic surgeon operate on you. The preparation time will be an hour or more, the surgery will take approximately 15 seconds. The surgeon will put the stitch in, and it will melt away with time."

"Will I have it done here Doctor?"

"Yes, it is done here at the hospital. If this were a larger community, it would be done in an outpatient facility. Here, in Temple, everything happens at the hospital. I can see you don't use glasses or contact lenses. Why don't I recommend a plastic surgeon to do the operation for you?"

"That will be fine doctor, thank you very much."

******************

As she was standing at the desk was waiting for paperwork, and aide rolled Dan into the room. He looked as if a little girl used a 'Play Doctor Kit' on him, because of the myriad of bandages on his legs, right arm, neck, face, and ears. His left arm was encased in a cast, from his fingertips to his shoulder, and he was wearing a flak jacket around his chest to protect his broken ribs. The look on his face was as mean as a junkyard dog.

Margaret was shocked as she looked at the damage she did.

Lucius and the members of the security teams had other ideas. They stood between the two combatants, looked at each of them, then turned towards Margaret. 

Lucius yelled, "The Winner and New Champion, Margaret Post." Everyone applauded raucously.

Margaret blushed, but she raised her hands over her head as a sign of victory.

As they turned back towards Dan, his face was boiling with rage.

"Very funny you idiots, you're all fired."

The staff cheered, lifted Margaret in the air, and carried her towards the exit.

Dan yelled, "Hey, what about me?"

"What about you; we don't work for you anymore. You just fired us. Goodbye Danny."

"Get your ass back here now."

Doctor Finch said, "It looks like you lost round two to Ms. Post, Mister Morgan."

"It's General Morgan to you sonny."

Lucius walked up behind Dan, and said to the Doctor, "He gets grumpy when he's hungry; and when he's hungry he likes to chew on people."

"So help me God Lucius, I am going to kill you if you don't get me out of here."

"Would you like to take a trip to the stars Doc? We haven't been able to find a doctor willing to go on the trip with our space travelers. Would you think about it before you say no? The way your wife left you, there is really no reason for you to stay here."

"Can I stop by your place, and take a look at the project, before I comment?"

"Sure, just ask for me, Colonel Lucius Canyon. I'll show you around."

"Get me out of here Lucius."

"When was the last time you had real food Dan. I don't want you gnawing on my wrist as I try to get you in the car."

"Where is my fucking gun, you're a dead man."

"I may see you later Doc. I'll be in the morgue."

Doctor Finch laughed for the first time, in more than a month.

*****************

108. Problems With The Flight Plan

One of the few times Zoie and Gordon were not cloistered in their bedroom, they were sitting in the den, talking with Jennifer, and me, about another breakthrough that Gray made in the lab. My son was truly worth more than his weight in gold.

Zoie told us something funny that happened at her school, and we were laughing, when Richard joined us.

"I know I'm not supposed to butt in to your scientific stuff, but I've been doing some studying. I think you're wrong about Kepler 62E in the way you're going to get there. Can I tell you about it?"

I said to my son, "Who told you that you're not supposed to butt in to our scientific discussions? Everyone, even Holden and Teddy are allowed to ask questions about anything we are doing. It doesn't have to be about space, it could be about anything you want to talk about Richard. What is on your mind son?"

"You planned our course for the trip to 62E Gordon. You didn't realize you were going to take us through the Western most portion of a 'White Hole'. If we go your way, we are going to exit the 'White Hole' less than five to eight light years away from the Sagittarius 'A' Star, which is being sucked into a 'Supergiant Black Hole.' We may not have enough power to escape the gravitational pull of that massive Black Hole, even though we are going to be approximately 30 trillion miles away from it."

The four of us sat there stunned by Richard's revelation. It was not about the way he spoke to us about science. It was how much he advanced in such a short period of time. Four months ago, he appeared to be a normal healthy child and Jennifer and I was very pleased with him as he was. Then he began to advance quickly in the scientific methods. Any time he asked for help in his studies, I was at his side showing him the way.

Then he branched off into an area Gordon was better at than I was, and he began helping Richard more than me. I began to wonder if Richard had eclipsed Gordon in celestial navigation. The look on Gordon's face told me he was thinking the same thing.

Gordon looked at his brother and asked, "Rich where did you find all this information. I went over all the latest star charts from the ESA last month. There was no indication of anything blocking our way to Kepler. However, I'm getting ahead of myself. What the hell is a 'White Hole'? I've never heard of that terminology before."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 22



"Don't worry about it Gordon, neither have I. It was going to be my question when you finished talking to your brother."

"I didn't know what else to call it dad, but it's a weird thing when you watch it at work."

"How did you see it working Richard?"

"The scientists moved Hubble to look at the Black Hole, because they believe the Sagittarius 'A' Star is going to collapse, within the next 10 light years or less. When it does, the explosion is going to be so massive, it will double the size of the Supergiant or more. They want to watch it happen."

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere in that quadrant when the shockwave hits. It will destroy everything in its path, including planets."

"You're right dad. All eight ESA telescopes will be focused on that area of the sky, when Hubble confirms the explosion has occurred. The Europeans will be looking to see what the shockwaves do to the planets and the stars in that system. They will be looking not only for the damage that is done, but also for the change to their orbits. It could change the entire Sagittarius cluster."

Gordon got that grin on his face, and I immediately said, "Don't even think about it."

"Come on dad, it will be like a walk in the park."

"That's one hell of a walk Gordon."

"Dad if Delicious can get us up to Warp Eight, we point the nose of the ship directly at the Supergiant. We can turn our antennas towards it, and record everything that's happening. We can transmit it back to earth in real time. 

We can plan our approach to stop at 30 trillion miles from the Star. If it hasn't exploded by that time, like a Kansas tornado, we turn 125 degrees from it, and run like hell, while still transmitting back to earth."

Jennifer said, "Come to me Richard."

Richard stood in front of her.

"Yes mommy?"

"I want you to count to five and start humming anything you want for 10 seconds, and then you can stop."

"Okay mom, one, two, three, four..."

Jennifer covered Richard's ears tightly and said, "Gordon, you've got giant size brass balls."

When she finished she uncovered Richard's ears.

Everyone in the room was laughing, but Zoie was laughing the loudest. She climbed on Gordon's lap and kissed him.

"Oh my God, not those too?"

Zoie blushed as she nodded her head.

I looked at my wife. "Are you sure we didn't have accidental sex, while you were in college?"

"I'm sure Even. I would remember that elephant trunk of yours even if I were drunk out of my mind. It would've killed me when I was 19."

Zoie put her head into Gordon's shoulder and giggled.

"Girl, you have to stop that. By now you should be quite familiar with the male the species."

"Mom not only is she familiar, she has already taken charge of that area of my body. She took an indelible magic marker and wrote 'Property of Zoie Luck on it.' After we get married she is going to have it tattooed."

I flinched. "That is really going to hurt my son."

"It is okay dad. I've already got it figured out. If we get married late in December, and I keep her in bed until the night of the 24th, I am safe. We have to board 'The Best Luck' first thing Christmas morning, and everyone will be busy completing his or her checklists. There won't be time for me to get a tattoo."

Zoie snuggled against him. 

"Sometimes men are so dumb. My mom has two picks. One of them is going to be a tattoo artist."

"I hate you Zoie Schneider."

"You won't when I'm Zoie Luck, and I'm carrying your baby."

"Mom, dad, help me."

"Gordon, I asked you in the drugstore if you were sure about Zoie, and you answered my question, with a question. I'm going to ask you another question, and this time I want an answer. When you saw Zoie for the first time, did you fall in love with her using the big head, or the little head?"

"It was the big head mom. The little head came later, and it came a lot."

"You're disgusting Gordon. I didn't have to know that."

"I thought it would be your next question, so I answered it for you."

"Can we get back to the problem at hand? If we are not going to go to Kepler 62E, what was our next option?"

"We are going to be on the other side of the universe dad. I have to start another search."

Richard asked his brother if he could help in his search for our new home.

"You caused this problem Rich; you should be part of the solution. It's time we tested you out of school; don't you think so dad?"

"How do you feel about that Richard? Would you like to stay in school, with your friends, or start working with us at our laboratory?"

Richard winked at me so his mother couldn't see. "I'd like to work with you in the lab dad, but there is this one little girl I'd like to bring..."

Jennifer yelled, "Oh no you don't. You are not nine years old yet, and I will not have it young man. There is no way on this earth you are going to bring a nine-year-old girl into this house, with the intention of having sex with her."

I clapped my hands and laughed at my wife. Gordon and Zoie played innocent. Jen looked at Richard as he smiled. Jen realized she had been played.

"You are going to get such a spanking."

"Jen what you give our son, I will give to you in spades, hearts, diamonds, and clubs."

"Come here Richard."

"Okay mommy, I'll count to five and hum."

^^^^^^^^

"Fuck you Even."

"Darling, after your rear end is bright red, you will, and for a very long time."

"Way to go dad."

"Shut up Gordon, or I'll take the door off your room."

"It would be okay with us now mom. We are very comfortable with one another. Your problem would be with Richard and Holden. They would get an advanced lesson in sex, at a very tender age."

"What did you do to my wonderful son Even? Logic, that's all I get from him. I never get a straight answer any more. He wraps it around a psychological answer, and ties me in knots. I don't like you. Go to your room, you're being punished for the rest of the day."

"I'll go to bed when Tammy tells me to, and not one second before."

"It's time for you to go back to bed Doctor Luck."

"You're doing that because you heard my wife threatened me."

"You're partially correct, but it has been two hours, and you need your rest, and medication. If you aggravate her anymore, she could become violent, and hurt you severely. I am in charge of your body today, and I don't want that on my record sheet. Bed, Doctor Luck, don't make me say it again."

"Yes warden, I'm on my way. If you need a relaxation session Jennifer, come with me. If not, you are coming with me anyway."

"You're not getting off my shit list that easily."

"How much would you like to bet?"

"We will discuss that later."

"Lily livered-chicken shit."

"If you keep talking to me like that I'm going to bite it off."

"You would break your jaw trying."

"Men, I am surrounded by men. Don't you leave me Zoie; I will hate you forever if you do."

"If you said that to my mom and dad 10 years ago, they would have given you $1 billion."

"You have a lot to learn Zoie. Regardless of how trying a child is, a parent would throw themselves in front of a bus trying to save them."

"Mom, my mother or father would have been driving that bus. I was a bitch on wheels."

"From the day I was introduced to sex, I was the queen of bitches. I could teach you things about sex you never heard of before, and your parents would jump over the railing voluntarily."

"Go inside Gordon, mom and I have to talk."

"Great, because Richard and I have to talk also. Come on little man, let's talk science."

"I'm not so little anymore."

"Okay, I'll just call you Richard from now on."

"You can call me Rich too."

"Anything you want is fine with me brother. Show me what you found on your computer, especially what the 'White Hole' looks like."

As they left the room, I heard, "It really is funny looking. It's like two megaphones. The large ends are facing in opposite directions. The small ends face each other, but they don't touch. That's the weird thing about them. If you fight the force going in, and don't gain enough speed, you can't make the jump from one side to the other. You crash and burn for lack of a better explanation."

"However, if you anticipate entering the Hole, and you are moving at more than light speed, you can make that jump, and come out the other side.

You can estimate where you will exit, but don't plan on it being exact. At this point, the closest I can figure is between five and eight light years away from your predicted exit point. I don't know where, inside the White Hole, you can safely start to slow down.

There is another problem with this form of transportation. Both sides work both ways, and there is no double line separating the flow of traffic. I don't know how it does it. I don't know if it knows. 

If you enter one side, and I enter the other, at approximately the same time, and at the same speed, what is going to happen to us when we make that jump in the middle? What is going to happen to us if we are in the same cone going in opposite directions? I don't know.

I do know you do not want to get hit by a space rock after it exits the White Hole traveling at light speed or more. It will ruin your spacecraft, and your day."

"I have a question Rich. Is it worth the risk to go through this thing of yours to see a planet as it gets sucked into a Black Hole, when telescopes all around the world are going to see it?"

"All the best telescopes in the world are going to see this event using x-ray telescopes from Earth. The U.S. has Chandra in space, and it will take the best x-ray pictures of the Sagittarius A Star collapsing into the Black Hole. Then they will have to colorize it using their best guess theory."

"If we do it, we will see it live, and in color. Our telescopes, radar, x-rays, and other devices will record it from less than 100 trillion miles away. It's the difference between a bunt, and a Grand Slam Home Run."

We can send our information back to earth by datalink. It will take a few hundred years to get there, but what they had to color enhance to put together will look like crap compared to what we will send them. If you really want to cut that return time down even more, we can always go back through the 'White Hole' a second time, and hope to come out where we started."

Gordon laughed. 

"Mom said I had 'Giant Size Brass Balls.' I have marbles compared to you."

"It feels nice to be compared to you Gordon. I've always looked up to you."

"Richard on your first try, you found something no one else on this planet has ever heard of or seen. You are going to be in all the scientific journals, right along with dad. Close your eyes and think about this: Even Luck, Delicious Luck, Gordon Luck, and Richard Luck. Soon, we will add one more name: Holden Luck. I wish mom could be added to that list. Our whole family would be there. Wouldn't that be wonderful?"

"That would be amazing Gordon, I don't think there's any family in the world that ever had everyone's name listed on scientific journals."

"Where should we start our search? Do you want to look Northeast of Sagittarius, or are we going to come back through the 'White Hole', and continue towards the Kepler's?"

"Let's start in the area of Sagittarius and see what we find. If there is nothing in the Northeast quadrant, we can fly an arc towards the South, and continue to make a complete circle. It's a very big universe Richard; we will find a home for ourselves out there."

"This is very exciting Gordon. Can I go to work with you tomorrow and search the star charts with you?"

"We are going to have to clear that with mom, but since we are going to be testing you out of school soon, I don't think she'll put up a big fight."

Jennifer said, "You are correct Gordon, she will not put up a fight at all. You can take your brother to work with you, and I will make the arrangements with the school board to have them test him out of elementary school and high school."

"Thank you mom, I'm really looking forward to this adventure. This is really going to be cool."

"Well, if it is, make sure to bring a sweater."

"Oh mom, that was terrible. You should be able to do better than that."

"Yes, I could have Gordon, but I wanted to hear you complain. Since I purchased those condoms for you, you've been in too good a mood."

"Zoie has had that effect on me, and I believe I've had the same effect on her."

"If you don't see it young man, I'm sending you to the eye Doctor. She blushes, and smiles all day long. I don't know what she is remembering, but she's having an awful good time, whatever it is. You are good for each other, keep it up and you will keep her smiling."

"It's so new to both of us, we haven't passed page 6 yet."

"You bought a book? How did you get into an adult store to buy a book on sex?"

Gordon said, "We didn't, my sister did it for us. Delicious said it would help us experiment, and understand our bodies better."

Jen yelled, "Even Luck, I am going to kill our daughter. She is having a deleterious effect on our younger generation."

"Are you talking about the book I told her to buy?"

"I'm going to kill you first, and then I'm going to kill our daughter. How could you possibly do it to them?"

"Jen, what is wrong about buying a book for the kids called, "How to Make a Marriage Happy." Its number 18 on the New York Times bestsellers list. I thought it would be good for them."

"Did Delicious get you that book Gordon?"

"Yes mom she did."

"Oh God, I'm sorry I flew off the handle at you. I apologize."

"It's okay mom. Since dad's been sick, you have been under a lot of pressure. He's not easy to deal with all the time. We all love you, and understand what you're going through."

Jennifer ruffled Gordon's hair as she used to when he was young. "My little boy is still in there somewhere. Would you tell him I said hi, and I love him too?"

Gordon kissed his mother. "He knows mom, and if you're not careful, he's going to spank you, again."

Jennifer laughed. She began walking towards the den, and back to me. She stopped before she reached the kitchen.

"No that was too easy. Come here Gordon."

Our son was standing beside her in seconds.

"What's up mom, what's wrong?"

"I want to see that book. I want to see it in my hands now."

"Sure mom, I'll get it."

It was a quick round-trip, and Gordon handed the book to her.

"I apologize again Gordon; I thought I was being played."

"I wouldn't do that to you mom. Dad told you the name of the book, and Delicious brought this book for Zoie and me."

"Thank you Gordon, you can go back to Richard now."

Jennifer continued to the kitchen, stopped for a glass of water, and joined me in the den. She was in the process of sitting down when she yelled, "Gordon get your ass in here."

Zoie and I looked at each other and knew she had finally figured it out.

"What is it this time mom. Richard and I will never get any work done, if I have to keep running up and down the hallway."

"Was that the only book Delicious brought you home yesterday?"

"Of course not, why would you go to a bookstore and only buy one book. I'll bring you in the other one, and the receipt."

Gordon brought back a huge particle physics book and a receipt for two books for $89.68.

"This is it Gordon, there are no more books."

"Mom, Zoie, and I will stay here with dad. You can check our room. Look anywhere you'd like. These are the only two books that are in our room."

"Don't play with me Gordon, I'll go in there and check."

"Mom, please get this over with. Richard wants to start looking at the star charts; and he doesn't understand them well enough to do it without me. Go into our room and tear it apart. Zoie and I will put it back together later. There are no other books in my room."

"I'm going to look."

"Would you like me to help you up?"

"Dammit Even, he's telling the truth. I thought I had him."

"You were hoping your son was lying to you Jennifer? Isn't that a little sad, when you think about it?"

"Don't you start with me too; you are the one that's causing me this nervous breakdown."

"You are free to go Gordon. I promise I will not call you again."

"Just in case you get the itch to check our room, I will leave these two books here in plain sight. You will know where they are at all times, and any other books you find, you can burn."

"Don't be a pain in the ass Gordon, just go, and be with your brother."

"Baby, I think you should come with me. There may be words said between my mother and father that a child of your tender years is not supposed to hear."

"Fuck off Gordon."

"I hope you didn't hear that Zoie."

"Hear what sweetheart?

"Will the two of you get out of here before I start throwing those books at you?"

"If you do throw them mom, please throw the physics book at Zoie. That sucker weighs 11 pounds, and it will hurt."

Zoie grabbed Gordon's ear. "Mister Luck, I have something important to say to you, follow me." She pulled him out of the room while he complained about her holding his hearing mechanism.

She pulled him into their room, closed the door, and kissed him. "Where is the book?"

"It's inside the particle physics book."

"How did you do that?"

"I watched a movie called 'The Shawshank Redemption'. They showed a guy doing it to a Bible so he could hide something in it. I knew our new book was going to cause us trouble, so I took the precaution of bringing home that particle physics book. I used a surgical blade to cut out enough pages for the other book to fit inside it. Thank goodness yesterday was garbage day, and the recycled paper is gone."

"My hero."

"Come with me my love, my brother is waiting to find us a new home. I promised I would be there to show him the way to do it."

"How did you get so smart?"

"I have an advantage. I was born with a photographic memory; and I was brought up by Doctor Even Luck. Anyone who was as lucky as I was, couldn't help but to be ahead of a lot of other people. I got you, didn't I?"

"No you didn't, I got you."

"I am not going to argue that point. Let's join Richard, and go planet hunting."

"Can I have a blue one, please?"

"I can't promise a blue planet, but I do promise it will have an awful lot of green."

Zoie pouted. "My favorite color is blue."

"My favorite color is red, and that is going to be the color of your beautiful behind after I finish using my hand on it."

"I told you that you were going to turn into a pervert, and I was correct."

"You have a luscious bottom, I love kissing, licking, biting, and spanking it. One day I am going to fuck it."

"I knew it, you are a pervert." She ran to the door, opened it, and went to Richard's room for safety.

"Hi Richard, have you found anything new, since your mom called Gordon away?"

"Hi Zoie; I may have found something interesting and scary. The Europeans will have to verify it to see if it's charted already, and how close it will come. This is an asteroid, about 860 kilometers wide, heading this way. I'm looking at the NEO (Near Earth Objects) display, and I had Big Blue run an analysis of the trajectory of this dot here. It's 182 days away, traveling at 24, 260 miles an hour. Blue says it could pass us within 4000 miles of us plus or minus 8%."

Gordon yelled, "Get in here dad, this is important."

I am faster than a turtle, but not as quick as a hare. When I heard Gordon call for me, I started walking towards Richard's room.

My warden said, "Where the hell do you think you're going?"

Thinking quickly, I said, "Bathroom."

"One day Doctor you are going to figure out you can't lie to me. I want to know what your son found too. The next time we have to move this fast, we will do it in a wheelchair, okay?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 22



"Yes ma'am, wheelchair, I hate that fucking thing. I feel like an invalid in it."

"You're getting so close Doctor, don't ruin it now."

"The voice of reason, talking to an angry man. Thank you, I don't say it enough, but thank you."

"Move your ass Doctor; let's see what Richard has found."

It felt like decades since I'd been in Richard's room, and it was totally changed. His baby furniture was gone. His new furniture was in a Western theme, with a desk a computer console and a bookshelf. I was going to ask Jen if she let him pick it out himself, but I would be pushing it if I did. I liked being vertical.

My bedroom chair magically appeared in front of his computer, and his was right beside it. I sat down and asked him what he found that was so important.

Richard used his computer like a veteran. He used a pencil to point out a dot in the Northwest quadrant of his computer and it had a cursor show its projected trajectory and speed. Then he handed me Big Blues' prediction using the Earth's orbit around the sun, the sun's orbit around the center of our universe, and the intersect point of the earth, and the asteroid.

"How big did you say it was Richard?"

"It is about 860 kilometers wide dad. It's just a little smaller than Texas."

My mind raced with the possibilities. It was six months away. If it made a 1/18th° deviation to the left of its current course, during the next one hundred and eighty six days, it would hit Earth, and destroy all life on the planet for hundreds of years.

"Get me a telephone Jennifer." It didn't take her long and I had one in my hand.

I called Doctor Oyster, because he was at Caltech, and Caltech controlled Hubble.

"Hello Even, how are you feeling?"

"When you look at what I'm looking at, you are going to be shitting in your pants."

"What's going on, you're not an alarmist."

"Can you pull up NEO on your computer?"

"Yes, why Even, what have you found?"

"I didn't find it. My nine-year-old son, Richard, did. He gets to name it. Tell me when you have it on your screen."

"Go ahead Even, I have it on."

"Northwest quadrant at an azimuth from center, 349°, follow the arc up until you intersect a bright pulsing dot."

"Who's transmitting this Even?"

"It's coming out of Scotland."

"Okay I see it, what about it?"

"Richard ran this through our IBM. It's moving at 24,000 mph and will intersect with Earth in approximately six months at a close approach of 4000 miles plus or minus 8%. With a deviation during its flight time of 1/18°, it's a direct hit. It's a planet killer. I suggest you move Hubble and verify what I just told you."

"Are you kidding Even? I had you on speaker, the three people that heard you are already running to their phones. What made Richard look in that area?"

"I'll let him tell you, because I don't know."

"Doctor Oyster would like to speak with you Richard. Don't be nervous, just be yourself."

"Hello Doctor, this is Richard."

"Hello Richard, your dad is very proud of you, and he has every right to be. You found something early enough we may be able to save our home. You are an amazing young man."

"Thank you very much Doctor Oyster."

"What made you look at that quadrant of the sky Richard?"

"I was talking with the family yesterday, after discovering that our route to Kepler 62E would take us through the center of a White Hole. As we discussed it, we decided to go through the White Hole to the area of the Sagittarius A Star, and take pictures of it being eaten by the Supergiant Black Hole, and transmit them back to earth. That way you could see what it would actually look like in living color, rather than by x-ray.

After we finished that portion of our survey, we were going to look for a new home north east of Sagittarius N. That's where this asteroid happened to be."

"What goes on in your household Richard? I have to move in. I feel like the village idiot. What is a White Hole?"

Richard took several minutes to explain to the professor what a White Hole was.

"You discovered this yesterday?"

"No, I actually found it the day before yesterday, but it took me a day to build up the nerve to talk to my father about it. He is a very smart man, and I didn't want to seem stupid in front of him."

"Somehow Richard I don't believe any of Even's children are going to be stupid. Would you ask him to adopt me please?"

"Doctor Oyster wants you to adopt him dad."

"Tell him I'll make him a deal later."

"Doctor, my dad said he will make you a deal later."

"Okay, tell him I'm going to fly out there tomorrow, or the next day. Goodbye Richard, think of a great name for your new discovery. After Hubble verifies that it is really coming this way, you have to name it, because you saw it first."

"Thank you Doctor Oyster, I'm going to name it Kublai Khan, when the time comes."

"What an excellent name for a killer asteroid Richard. That is an excellent name. I will see you soon."

****************

In the control room, they sent Hubble a message to turn, open its huge mirror, and see if this new invader, to our tiny piece of sky in the Milky Way, was a real threat to our planet. Two hours later, Hubble sent a reply that it was ready.

Controllers sent a message Hubble was accustomed to getting. Remain in place, and take sequential pictures of that area of the sky, until we tell you to stop. Technically, it was called, "A Deep Space Field."

This test of the camera would last one week, and focus on one moving object to verify its course and speed. Other 'Deep Space Fields' lasted a month or more, and revealed stars and gaseous nebulas scientists believe were formed shortly after the 'Big Bang.'

**************

109. Sex and Marriage

"Hi Steph, how has your day been?"

"Hello darling, what a wonderful surprise. I could use the break. Things are so crazy here I can't see my desk through the paper. Can you invent a device to clone me? I could really use another me to get through this crap."

"Stephano, hire more staff."

"The building is full, where would I put them?"

"Take security out of their ready room. Move some of them down by the computers, and the rest of them throughout the building. Put your staff in there."

"I never thought of that. I'll run it by Dan and William to get their input on it."

"You sound awfully tired Stephano, why don't you go home and go to bed. I'll sing you a lullaby."

"If you were in my bed, you wouldn't be able to sing."

"Why, why wouldn't I be able to sing?"

"My dick would be so far down your throat it would be tickling your asshole."

"I remember your dick as being tiny. I must need a refresher course."

"Someone must've hit you over the head again if you remember my dick as being tiny. When I put it up your ass the last time, your eyeballs nearly popped out of your head."

"I've never had anal sex. I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Patricia, you are a lying sack of dog shit."

"I'm lying in bed playing with my pussy, and you're talking to me when you're supposed to be drowning in paperwork. You must not be all that busy. Are you fucking your secretary as we talk?"

"Yes, all three of them."

"I hope they have large magnifying glasses so they can find you. Hold on for a moment please; I'm getting ready to cum."

"If I was in Glen Falls right now I would shove an ice cube up your pussy and help you explode."

"If you were in Glen Falls the ice cube would melt before you got it into my pussy."

"Why, would you fight me?"

"I always fight you to make it more interesting while we are in bed. However, you would be in New York jerking off, because I am in Texas playing with my pussy. My husband has a terrible sense of direction."

"You bitch, I'll be right there."

Stephano said to his secretary, "Get a couple of the girls to help you for the next three or four days. Your salary just jumped to double, while I'm gone. Get as much work done as you can. I'll check it over when I get back. Here's my cell phone. Forget my home phone number. Only two people can call me Mister Zabo, and God."

"Yes Mister Valentino, tell Patti we said hello."

***********

Jemma walked into William's office with blood in her eyes. He was on the telephone, but he recognized that look.

"I'll call you back."

"Don't kill me Jemma, I will do this here, and then I'll take you home and do it with you for as long as you want."

"Even said you are the smartest man he has ever known, and he is right. I missed you so much William; I was getting ready to fuck the bedpost."

As he held her in his arms he asked, "Is the bedpost bigger than I am?"

"No, but it was there; and you were here. Undress me you sonofabitch, and stop talking."

There wasn't much to do, because underneath her floaty dress she was naked.

"I think you missed me."

"If you say one more word William, I'm going to rape you."

Jemma stripped him of his shirt, shoes, and slacks, as a tornado strips a wheat field. He was already rigid as she climbed on top of him. She exploded into orgasm as soon as he touched bottom.

"I don't care how dangerous it is here; I am never leaving you again. You can send Patrick away, but not me."

She continued riding him, while he suckled her breasts, and played with her clit. He knew exactly where to touch her, and Jemma came continuously, until she lost consciousness.

When she regained her composure, William was on top of her, moving slowly, while kissing her face.

"Darling girl, as much as you missed me, I missed you. There are things happening here that are extremely dangerous. We must send Patrick away soon. We will send him to Junior; he will be safe there. You will come to work with me every day so I can keep you safe. If anything were to happen to you, I would die."

"You are talking too much, and making love to me too slowly. Would you change that please?"

He did, and within a few moments; they both crested the horizon.

"You must send a note to United Airlines for me Jemma, thanking them for having you as my flight attendant? You are the best gift any man could ever hope for, or receive."

"How wrong could any man be? Look what you've done for me from the very beginning William. You've taught me how to speak correctly. You taught me how to be faithful to one man. You have given me two wonderful children, and a life anyone would envy. I love you more today, than I did when you put those Ben-Wa balls into my vagina, and took me to the party at the Justice Department, with no panties. 

When we left the building, and we were getting into the limousine, I warned you not to touch my ass. You didn't; you touched my thigh, and those balls shot out of me, like a bullet out of a gun."

William laughed. "That was a fun night, wasn't it? I did make up for it later that evening didn't I? We married in front of a Supreme Court justice, the Attorney General of the United States, and the Director of the FBI. You can't get much better than, can you?"

"You are lucky you did. I may have killed you in bed that night, if you didn't."

"Let's get dressed; I'm taking you home for a few days so we can catch up. I'm going to call Junior, and tell him Patrick is on his way to him, and why. I want him to have everything ready when he arrives."

"I'll also call Stephano and tell him I'll be gone for a few days."

"I wouldn't do that. I flew in with Patti. Stephano will be gone for a few days also."

"Who the hell is going to be in charge?"

"How about Lucius; you've always trusted him."

"What a brilliant idea; I think I'll keep you around for another 15 or 50 years."

William asked his secretary to get Dan Morgan on the phone.

"Yes Mister Zabo, how can I help you?"

"I am going to be out of the office for several days Dan. You are in charge of security as always. Lucius will take charge of the general operation while I'm not here. Anything to do with security is your baby. Do you understand?"

"Yes Mister Zabo, I understand."

Dan called Lucius on his cell.

"Yes general, how can I help you."

"I want you in my office in 30 seconds." 

Dan hung up the phone before Lucius could ask why.

Lucius ran into Dan's office with his arms behind his back. 

"I'm tired of you gnawing at my wrists, eat food instead."

"What did you do this time? Why is Zabo putting you in charge of everything?"

"I haven't talked to William in weeks; I don't know what you're talking about."

"He called me and told me you are in charge of the general operation here. Effectively, you are my boss."

"Really, how wonderful. Stand at attention general."

"In a pigs eye Lucius that will never happen."

"I didn't think so, but I thought I'd give it a try. Did William say anything else to you?"

"Yes he did. He wanted you in his office three minutes ago."

"You cock sucker. I hope that cast itches like crazy for the next three weeks, and when it comes off I hope you have boils on your skin."

Dan laughed as Lucius ran out of his office, and made his way down to the bowels of the building to Williams' office. When he got there, he was sweating like mad.

"Lucius, my friend, why are you sweating?"

"Dan kept me in his office reading me the riot act. When he was finished, he told me I was three minutes late getting here. You know how I hate to keep you waiting."

"How long have we been friends Lucius? It's almost 27 years now, isn't it? I don't think a few minutes between us is a problem. I believe it's time for you to put Dan through his paces."

"There are too many important things going on here William to make bad blood between Dan and me. We make a very effective team, and we are here to protect the program and you. For me, you come first."

"I smell sex, you can come out of the bathroom now Jemma. My friend would never cheat on you, not ever."

She walked out of the bathroom and smiled at him.

"I didn't know you were part hound dog Lucius."

"It's part of my training Jemma, and if you don't mind my saying, you look as lovely as ever."

"How could a woman ever refuse a compliment from a handsome man like you?"

"Are you two quite finished? I'm standing here, and you're playing with the affections of my wife again Lucius."

"I am not playing; I'm telling her the truth. I keep telling you that you are the smartest man on the face of the earth. Look at the wife you've chosen William, is there any female more beautiful than she is?"

"I am going to get a gun just to keep you two separated."

"I would never infringe on anything that is yours my friend. I hope you know that I would kill myself first."

"I know Lucius; you are the best friend I have ever had."

"I will protect you and your family, with the last breath I have in my body."

"I have a request Lucius."

"Anything you ask, I will get done."

"I want you to rent a Boeing 777 to take Patrick and four of your female agents to Shanghai. They are to deliver him to William Junior. He will his have his instructions by tomorrow morning his time. The aircraft will bring the women back here. Ask Even if Holden and any of the other employees, who have children around Patrick's age if they would like to go along for the ride. It would be nice if he had some company on the long trip.

I will make all of the appropriate arrangements. I will ask young William if there are any amusements in Shanghai for the children to enjoy for a few days, before they return home. I will cover all the costs for the entire trip."

"The aircraft will not be a problem William. Getting the names of the children from the parents may take a few of days. I will get to work on it immediately. How long do you think it will take to get passports and visas for them?"

William smiled at his friend.

Lucius said, "Sometimes I asked the dumbest questions."

"This office is yours until I return. Don't touch the red button under my desk. The room will explode if you do. Sit down my friend; you are in charge."

"William you are talking too much and your wife is standing beside you. You can continue talking, or you can get laid at home. Make your choice, but I'm leaving."

"Goodbye Lucius, I hope she doesn't kill me."

Jemma stopped him as soon as they closed the outside door.

"There is no red button, is there?"

"No Jemma, there is no red button."

"I have to know if he looked for it."

"Of course he did Jemma; it's human nature. Wouldn't you look for it?"

"Yes, but I have to catch him at it, I have to know for sure."

She opened the outside door, and quietly walked to the inside door. Abruptly, she opened the inside door, and found Lucius on his hands and knees looking under a desk.

She laughed. "Are you looking for something Colonel?"

"Yes I am. I wanted to make sure William didn't stick any gum under here that would get on my pants. It's tough to get off."

"You're not looking for a little red button are you?"

"Why would I be looking for a little red button? William said it was here, and he would never lie to me."

"I told you he has the quickest mind as anyone in the world Jemma. The Army's loss was my gain. I cleaned off the gum yesterday, because there was too much under my desk."

"Dammit William, he lies and you swear to it."

"Isn't that what friends do for one another?"

"Husband, you are in so much trouble."

"If you let me take you home, I'll show you how I get out of trouble. Goodbye Lucius, we're leaving now."

"I don't like you Lucius."

"You are absolutely adorable Jemma."

*****************

Ten minutes after William was safely away from the building, Lucius keyed the speaker system.

"Attention everyone, attention everyone, Mister Zabo is taking the next few weeks off. He has left me, Colonel Lucius Canyon, in charge of day-to-day operations. I repeat I am now in charge of all day-to-day operations. If you have a problem of a non-emergency nature, you will bring it to the attention of General Dan Morgan.

As you know, he is without a secretary at this time. He will triage each problem personally, and dispatch it to the appropriate authority. 

I will be personally interviewing each potential applicant as a replacement for Margaret Post, who is no longer the generals' secretary, because, as we are all aware, the general fucked that relationship up royally.

It should only take me four to eight weeks to find a successful applicant. At that time, I have to have her/his security clearance vetted, which will take us another few weeks. Then, and only then, will she/he be able to begin working for the general. That is all."

He barely had a chance to shut down the system, when his telephone rang.

In a very chipper voice he said, "Mister Zabo's office, this is Colonel Lucius Canyon speaking, this line is recorded for security, and training purposes."

"I am going to kill you, and burn your body until it is unrecognizable. Then I'm going to put your remains into a meat grinder and chew it up until it becomes dust. I will go to the roof, on a windy day, and let it take you to the four corners of the earth."

"I'm sorry I don't recognize the voice, who is this?"

"It's Dan you no good rotten bastard. Who did you think it was?"

"I don't know any Dan's, do you mean General Morgan?"

"You know god damn well it's me. Where did you put my gun you goddamn bastard."

"I hid it so you couldn't hurt Margaret."

"Margaret isn't here any longer. I want my gun back."

"I'll have Jayden bring it to you in five minutes. I'll be in your office in 10 minutes. You can take your revenge out on me at that time. Will that suit you?"

"You don't have the balls to show up in my office, when I have a gun in my hand."

"I will be in your office in 10 minutes general. The cameras are still off so there will be no one to testify against you, and no pictures of you committing a crime."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

Scientific Note: A Light Year (LY) is a MEASUREMENT OF DISTANCE, not a MEASUREMENT OF TIME. It is 6 trillion miles, plus, or minus 3%. When the Sagittarius 'A' Star explodes inside the Supergiant Black Hole, scientists 'believe' it will be the first time anything will escape from a Black Hole. It will be caused by the immense force of the explosion, and the rapid expansion of the Black Hole. Bob/P_D10





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



"Will one of you please tell me what's going on here?"

Doctor Finch said, "Everyone in the hospital heard about the miracle you performed a few moments ago. They are going to build a statue of you and put it in the lobby, surrounded by a fountain. The blind, the terminally ill, the mentally infirm; everyone will come here to be blessed by you. At $10,000 each, you will become a very wealthy man."

"Should I smack him now Lucius, or wait until Margaret is better?"

"I would wait until Margaret is better general, and then I would smack him. I wouldn't charge a penny less than $20,000 per person. Of course, children would be free."

"Lucius, you are disgraceful."

"Okay general, would you like to explain to me how, after 35 minutes of trying feverishly to bring Margaret back, the Doctors couldn't get her heart started. However, with one blow from your fist, you bring Margaret back to life?"

"I have no fucking idea. All I know is I didn't want to lose her."

"Are you saying the attending physician, and everyone else that was with her wanted to lose Margaret?"

"Of course not, I would have to sue William, and I have a feeling I would lose."

"Do you see how smart generals are Doc? They don't have to see the battlefield to know when they're overmatched."

"If Margaret continues to do well Colonel, do I still get my daughters?"

"Would you like to have a cup of coffee Doctor? This is a conversation best had privately. Most generals are blabbermouths."

"You're not going anywhere Colonel, not until I know Margaret's alright."

"Are you ever going to learn Dan? If she opens her eyes, who do you want her to see: Handsome, debonair me, or slightly pudgy, square-faced you?"

"I forgot to tell you Lucius; I'm pissed at you. You ate my bacon."

"Margaret just had a heart attack. When was the last time you had a physical to check the grease level in your veins?"

"Maybe 2 years now."

"Doctor Finch, you know what to do."

"Let's have our coffee. We will stop at scheduling and I will set it up for him. He's going to love it."

"Don't forget to do a cardiac catheterization on him."

"That will be one of the more pleasant exams we will give him. Our G.I. Doctor loves giving colonoscopies."

************

As they sat down to coffee, Lucius asked, "Why did you wife leave?"

"Temple is an underserved area. If you stay here for six years after you complete your residency, they forgive your student loans. I am a plastic surgeon. They have me working in the emergency room and anywhere they can use me, during my shift. I also have student loans of $320,000. My wife and I got married while we were in college. We had Lisa right away, but it was okay, because we had parents that were very supportive of us. We were never short of money. Shortly after Lisa, we had Charlotte. She is a beauty, in every way you can think of. 

Everything was fine, until we got here. She hated this place immediately. She was used to the finer things in life. She called this place a cowboy hick town. You have everything in the world you could ever want an hours drive south in Austin, but that wasn't good enough for her. All she did was complain. Eight months ago, she got a lawyer. He sued me for everything, including my jockstrap. Her parents gave her all the money she wanted to pay for her lawyer. It would have been too expensive for my parents to do. 

I was a faithful husband. I went to work, and went home. I was attentive to my wife, and I loved my children. 

Her lawyer tore me apart for taking my wife away from her family, and away from her standard of living. He tore me apart for everything you could think of, and the jury bought it. The people in this town agreed with my wife. Does that tell you how many people in this city hate being here?"

"Okay Doctor, now for the easy part. Do you want your wife to go to jail?"

"That would be poetic justice, wouldn't it? I could live with that Colonel."

"Does your wife drink?"

"When she goes to parties yes she does, but she doesn't drink while she is alone with the girls."

"What kind of driver is she?"

"Now that she's back home, she's probably driving a Mercedes sports car; that should answer your question."

"Does she party during the week, or just on the weekends?"

"The ski resorts are open at this time of year. The best time to party is during the week: Tuesday Wednesday and Thursday, when it's not too busy. There's no snow this early in the year. The college kids, and the locals, keep them busy enough to open, and make money." 

"Can you get time off to go see your girls for Thanksgiving?"

"Sandy will be pissed, but I'm sure I can get off for four or five days."

"That will do fine Doctor. It will give us enough time to learn the lay of the land. You should have your children in your arms by New Year's Day."

"If you can do that for me Colonel, you can count on your Doctor and a new family to go on your trip with you."

"Don't make any rash decision Doctor. I still think you should come over, and see what were doing first."

"I'll wait until we get Margaret out of here, then I'll come over."

"I'll be waiting for you."

"Thank you Colonel, I can't wait to see my girls. I'll send my wife an email telling her that I want the girls over the Thanksgiving holiday. As I said, she is not going to be pleased."

"Now isn't that a shame Doc."

****************

Paul Zachary sent Lucius a text: 'Uncle Lou can't be with you on assignment. Pauly.'

"Lucius counted every letter between the proper names. It appeared he was going to get 24 guests from the vice president. They were probably his very best; otherwise, Paul would not have broken radio silence. He had to know when they were coming, where they were landing, their time of arrival, and the kind of armaments they were bringing with them.

They had to be stopped before they disappeared into the community, and were able to set up a base of operation for the larger group to come.

General Morgan was of no use to him now. His mind was elsewhere. He needed Colonel Daniels. He also needed Agnes Moorhead from the FAA, and Patti Valentino, and her computer skills.

"First things first, I'll call Agnes. He took out his cell phone and hit her speed dial number."

"FAA flow control center, this is chief controller Moorhead, how may I help you?"

"Hello Agnes, this is Colonel Lucius Canyon; how are you today?"

Agnes stuttered as she tried to regain her composure.

"I haven't heard from him Colonel, I swear not one peep."

"I believe you Agnes, but I think you will be hearing from him in the next few days. I just wanted you to know I sent two men to Virginia to keep an eye on your parents. If I find out he calls you, and you didn't tell me immediately, your parents will be filleted alive."

"I promised you when we talked last time, as soon as I get word that any of his aircraft depart, you would be the first to know. I don't want my parents harmed. I will keep my word to you. I swear it."

"That's good to hear Agnes; I will tell my people to keep a good distance away from your parents, because you've given me your word. Don't disappoint me."

"I have your number on speed dial Colonel, when I hear anything, you will hear it seconds later."

"Have a good day Agnes, keep the airplanes flying smoothly."

******************

"Jack, I need you at the NEST yesterday, we are expecting visitors."

"Fuck Lucius, they are early."

"This is a reconnaissance team, and we are going to take them out, before they can get into position. What did you do besides build, and destroy stuff?"

"We laid landmines, Claymore's, Bangalore's, and booby-traps. If it had anything to do with explosives, my team and I did it."

"Where the hell do you get your hands on explosives in Texas?"

"Come on Lucius, you have to be kidding me. You can get explosives at the 7/11 in Texas, if you have cash."

"See Stephano in the morning, and get a check for $20,000.00. If he asks what its' for, tell him I said it was for spy removal. That should end his questions. Go to the bank and get cash. Buy whatever you need."

"This is going to be such fun."

"I don't want it to be fun; I want it to be quick."

*************

"Hello Stephano, you are going to be at your desk tomorrow morning."

"No Lucius I'm taking the day off."

"No Stephano, you're going to be at your desk tomorrow morning, until you write Colonel Daniels a check for $20,000, then you can go home."

"Why am I writing...?"

"Stephano, you are writing a check for $20,000 tomorrow morning, because I asked you for it. You don't want to know what it's for, and you don't want to ask any more questions; just do as I ask, please."

"Alright Lucius, I'll be in the office at 8 AM. Is there anything else you need from me?"

"General Morgan is out the position, because of Margaret. Effectively, I am in charge of security, until that situation resolves itself. If anyone has a problem with that, take it up with Mister Zabo."

"I have no problem with it Lucius; I think you're the best man for the job."

"Thank you Stephano, I appreciate your vote of confidence. May I speak to Patti please?"

"She's riding my dick, give her a moment. She can't fuck, and talk at the same time."

"Fuck you Steph. Hi Lucius, what can I do to help?"

"How do you know what I'm going to ask you isn't illegal?"

"I owe you and your friends my life Lucius. Fuck illegal."

"Patti, the VP is sending us 24 uninvited guests. I have to know when they depart, and what their arrival time is. It would be great to know what their armament package is, and if possible, who they are. The more information I have on them, the better I can prepare for them. The aircraft are probably registered to 'Advanced Algorithms' or 'James Pierce."

"Is that all you want?"

"Yes, that's all I need."

"Will tomorrow at noon be soon enough?"

Lucius heard Stephano in the background, "Patti stop showing off, and turn around so I can get to your tits."

"Lucius, my husband is about to cum, and he hates it when I'm distracted. It will be on his desk by 12:01P.M. I'll be in his office getting laid."

"I'll make sure to knock, before I come in."

"I told you that you were a real gentleman."

***********************

"How are you feeling?"

"It feels like an elephant sat on my chest."

"That elephant might have been me Margaret."

"What did you do this time Dan?"

"I got angry with God for taking you away from me. I reached my fist up into the air, and demanded he give you back. When nothing happened, I brought fist down, and by accident my fist hit you in the center of your chest."

"You always were a clumsy oaf."

"Maybe, but a second later, your heart started beating, and it hasn't stopped."

"You saved my life?"

"I may have started your heart, but it wasn't your time to go Margaret. You haven't married me yet."

"That's probably what caused my heart attack. The ring is gorgeous. It must've cost you a fortune."

"I don't know, Lucius won't tell me. He said it's a gift from everyone. I made him swear it was not stolen."

"He wouldn't do that to you Dan. Then again, he might, just to get even with you for getting him thrown out of the Army."

"No, we are beyond that now. You settled it for us. You settled a lot of things. All you had to do was die to do it. You died at 9:09 AM. So what do you want to do now Margaret?"

"I don't know Dan, what do you want to do?"

"I told everyone to keep Valentine's Day blocked on there calendars, because I'm going to ask you again, and again, and again. Margaret Post will you marry me?"

"Oh hell my flowers, I left them in the sink. I hope I didn't ruin them."

"Are you going to think of anything else to avoid answering my question? I would rather it be a no, so I can figure out another way to attack the problem, rather then be left hanging with no answer."

"Close the drape Dan, we have to talk."

"Okay, tell me why you don't want to marry me."

"How did you know?"

"You asked me to close the drape. If it was going to be yes, you would have screamed it from the highest tree top."

"You ruined my life Dan. Since the day I left you, I was unable to trust any man. There were many who were very nice to me, but as we grew closer, all I could remember is how you treated me, while we were together, and then lied to me. I withdrew from all of them. I was never going to be hurt by another man, as I was by you again. You may not have wanted to get married, but I couldn't get married, because of what you did to me. I can never forgive you for doing that to me."

"Why did you leave Pennsylvania, and come to work for me?"

"I was maxed out on my government retirement program, and you offered me a ton of money. Why wouldn't I double-dip?"

"You had no feelings for me at all?"

"I've always had feelings for you, and I probably always will. Deep in my soul, I love you, but in my mind, I know I'm going to get hurt again. I'm not willing to take that chance. I was going to tell you that when you called me the evening of the accident."

"Do you believe a man can change? Do you believe in enlightenment? To be truthful with you Margaret, I didn't. I've known too many men and women, while I was in the service, and they never changed. A leopard is a leopard, and it can't change its spots.

I've known good men all my life, and as soon as they were away from their wives, they would screw anything in a skirt. While they were home, they were absolute angels. You couldn't ask for a better husband or father. You ask any of their wives if their husbands were capable of cheating on them, and they would swear, on a stack of Bibles, it was not possible. Their husbands would go to church with them, take them out to dinner, be attentive to their needs and wants, and take care of the children so they can go out with their friends, while he was at home. He was God's gift to the married woman, and he was, until he was transferred overseas. Then he acted as if he wasn't married.

I wasn't married, but I wasn't like them. Yes, I had a few affairs, but they were few and far between. I was a loner. I learned to do my job better than anyone else did, because my secretary showed me how to do it perfectly the first time. I did it that way throughout my career. That's how I rose through the ranks quicker than my fellow West Point graduates did.

In all the years we were apart, I could remember your face perfectly. I laughed every time I heard someone speaking with a deep New England accent, because it brought you to mind.

Then you came to work for me. Lucius, God I wanted to kill him, walks into my office on his first day, and asks me when we are getting married. I knew you two couldn't have staged it, because of the way you greeted each other. From that day forward, every time he walked into the office, the two of you had a field day with me.

Even though I began to think it was a good idea, because of the way I felt about you, the two of you would stick spurs in my side, and I would push back the other way.

You two would laugh at my discomfort, and I would get angry with both of you. I knew I was wrong, but I would not admit it, because the both of you would have laughed at me again."

"Tell me I am wrong, Margaret, and I will never bother you again."

"What difference does it make if you are right or wrong; only your pride would have been hurt."

"What about you Margaret? What about your pride, and your infamous New England obstinance? Once you dug your heels in, there is no moving you at all. Is it true or false? How many times did we argue over something, and you wouldn't budge."

"I was right most of the time."

"That's not the point. First, you were talking to your commanding officer. Second, you were doing it in front of the entire office staff. I could have sent you to the brig for insubordination."

"You wouldn't do that to me. You needed me."

"I didn't need someone in my office that would disrupt order. You got away with more bullshit in that office, than anyone else would have."

"Why are we talking about events that happened 30 years ago?"

"We are talking about those years, because that is when you said I hurt you the most. If I could take those years back I would, but I can't. All I'm trying to say is I've changed. It took me a long time to do it, and one of my worst enemies to help me along, but I'm here. I'm begging you to accept my apology for the years that have gone by, and the amount of pain I caused you. I am asking you again to marry me, but if you can't, please forgive me for those transgressions. It will help me live with myself."

"I hate these damn tubes. I have them everywhere."

"Have they let you see the one in your abdomen yet?"

"Oh yes, that one is a beauty. Doctor Finch said I would not have a scar from that surgery, because he closed. I don't understand how, because the cut is massive."

"Lucius told me Finch is a plastic surgeon, that's probably why he said you won't have the scar."

"That answers that question."

"Are you ready to answer mine?"

"I was hoping you would forget."

"How could I possibly forget two questions that are very important to both of us?"

"What were the questions again?"

"Now is not the time to play dumb Margaret. You never forget anything. Answer my questions. The answers are either: no/no, no/yes, or yes/yes. I know which one I'm hoping for, but our future rests in your hands."

"Are you going to be able to control your pride?"

"Yes I am fully under control."

"Yes Daniel, I forgive you for those transgressions. The intense loneliness, the pain, and suffering I went through, and the men I turned away, because I was afraid to get hurt again."

He kissed her, and thanked her for her generosity. He asked, "Is there anything I can get you?"

"Yes, I need a legal pad, and a few pens."

"You're very weak; do you want me to send over a secretary to help you do whatever you going to do?"

"No, I want to do the guest list by myself."

"Okay."

He started opening the privacy sheet. He stopped abruptly.

"What list?"

"The guest list."

"No, the guest list for what."

"I was thinking of having a party afterwards."

"What kind of party?"

"Party for our guests, of course."

"Did you say our guests?"

"I don't think so."

"I think you're lying."

"I try never to lie."

"Are you always successful?"

"I am, most of the time." 

"Were you successful this time?"

"Mostly!"

"Mostly is like close; it only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades. Did you tell me the complete and unadulterated truth?"

"Not exactly."

"You have a smile on your face that tells me you're lying. I'll get Lucius in here, and have him torture you until you tell me the truth. Did you say our guests or not?"

"I'm not sure."

"Let's try this again. What kind of party are we having?"

"It doesn't matter what kind of party we are having?"

"There it is, you used the word we again."

"It must've been the slip of the tongue."

I'm going to attack this from a different direction.

"Margaret Post, will you marry me?"

"WE can't throw a party, if I don't say YES."

Dan smiled. "Give me one moment please."

He opened the privacy sheet, and asked everyone at the nurse's station to join him at Margaret's cubicle.

When they arrived, he said, "I need you as witnesses so I can sue this woman if she takes these words back. Margaret Post will you marry me?"

"Daniel Morgan, yes I will marry you, but if you ask me one more time I may change my mind."

"Did everyone here that? Margaret has agreed to marry me. She is mine and no one else's. You are all invited to our wedding on Valentine's Day. Give her your names and she will put them on our guest lists. Does anyone have a legal pad? If not, I will go to guest services and get one immediately."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



"We have some at the station."

"I will reimburse the hospital. Thank you ladies, I appreciate your being here."

Dan kissed Margaret more passionately this time. "Don't you dare have another heart attack; I'm not sure if I could bring you back the next time. You have to make a phone call to our best friend, and give him the news."

Dan pushed the speed dial, and handed the phone to Margaret. She put the phone on speaker.

"Hi Dan, how is she doing?"

"It's me Lucius, and I feel much better. He bought the act, lock stock, and barrel. I hooked him; he's mine."

Dan yelled, "I'm going to kill both of you. You two set me up again?"

Lucius said, "Dan, how can you be such an idiot, and a General Officer at one time. Could Margaret fake a heart attack? Did you see the monitors on the wall for yourself? Didn't you see her go flat line? If I knew you were this dumb, I would have put you on the witness stand as a defense witness. I would never have been thrown out of the Army."

Dan looked at Margaret, who had her hand covering her mouth stifling a laugh.

"Woman if you weren't dead already; I would be forced to kill you."

"Lucius told me you were easy, but I never knew you were this easy."

"Where do you want to hold the wedding Dan?"

"It has to be here. I won't pull that many bodies away from the NEST."

"I agree. I'll talk to Stephano; his wedding was held outside, under a huge tent. I'll ask him about everything, and see what we can do about it."

"Don't forget, we're going to hold it on Valentine's Day."

"How could I possibly forget Margaret; I started that rumor."

"I swear to God Lucius, I should've killed you years ago."

"You must admit Dan; I add a lot of spice to your life."

"The spice you add is the kind I can do without."

"You're no fun anymore Danny. I have to talk to you when you leave the hospital. You must smell ripe by now."

"He could use a shower Lucius."

"Will you two leave me alone?"

"Oh, when you leave the hospital, would you check on my flowers please? You have to buy a big vase for them. Promise you won't get into an accident."

"Okay, I promise baby; I promise. You get some rest; I'll be back this evening, after I shower, shave, and kill Lucius."

"Watch out for that little guy; you will probably fall into another one of his traps."

"Don't remind me about traps again Margaret; I may believe you."

"Did the two of you forget that I am still listening?"

"No you are not." Dan hit the off button on his phone.

"He will be calling me back in a minute; I will see you later baby."

"Be safe Dan. Lucius will not call you. He will let you wonder why he hasn't, until you call him."

"How much do you want to bet?"

"One Dollar."

"You are on."

"Later Dan."

"Later Baby."

******************

112. Once More into the Breach

Here I was again, standing outside the stone, steel, and glass edifice that I hated, and loved. The pain that's all this place reminded me of, except of course, the people inside this building saved my life.

M.D. Anderson Hospital, Houston Texas. I did not want to go back inside, especially in this fucking wheelchair. Unfortunately, my Mafia contingent, who was still in charge of my body, was standing behind me. They would not miss this chance to humiliate me, in public, for the world. I should have been ruling them, or at least Jennifer should have been ruling them, but she had abrogated her responsibilities and laughed at me every time Hannah stuck me with her pin, Janice gave me physical therapy, or Tammy gave me the look that could freeze stone.

As the automatic doors opened, and I was pushed into the main lobby of the cancer center, I was again treated like a rock star. I smiled politely, and waved my hand to those who greeted me. We got into the elevator, and as soon as the doors closed, Hannah was on my case.

"I hope you enjoyed that Doctor, because if you fail the tests in here today, and tomorrow, you will be seeing those people very frequently."

Tammy disagreed. "He will not be seeing those people; he will be in the east wing. He will meet a new group of people, and he will find out what sickness really is. Maybe he will stop complaining about our treatment of him."

"He will never stop complaining Tammy. He can't take pain; he's a pussy."

"I have a pussy, and I don't complain like he does."

"That's because you use it wisely."

"Are you three finished now?"

Someone hit me from behind.

"There are four pussies back here, you idiot."

"I'm sorry Jen, I didn't count your pussy; I abuse it often enough."

I got hit four times for that remark. I could tell you which woman's hand was responsible for each of them. Damn, Hannah was strong; but Jennifer was no lightweight either. Then came Janice, and finally, Tammy. It was probably her only weak point as my nurse."

They rolled me into Doctor Seine's office. He did not acknowledge my presence, until he finished reading the reports in front of him. I sat there completely annoyed with him, until he raised his head, and frowned at me.

"Not good, Doctor Luck, not good at all."

I was heartbroken. I would never get back to work. I would never see 'The Best Luck' fly.

"What do I do now Doctor?"

"What do you want to do?"

"I want to go back to work. I want to finish my spacecraft. I want to prove to people that it is possible to put good people together and do things that others say can't be done can be done."

"Well Doctor Luck, what's stopping you? Everything in these reports tells me there's nothing more we can do for you. Live your life to the fullest, and tell those naysayers to go fuck themselves. You are cured. 

We are going to do some tests, while you're here, but your lab work tells me you are ready to go."

"Does that mean I can get rid of these three evil people?"

"No it doesn't. Where you go, they go. They are going to make sure you don't overstress yourself for the next two months. They are still in charge of your body. They are my eyes, ears, and brains. They are the reason you have come this far this quickly."

"Quickly, it feels like a decade."

"You have no right feeling as good as you do right now. It's a tribute to the amount of money you were able to spend on individual care, and the nurses you were able to steal from us. We want them back, but not before we know you are completely capable of performing your daily duties."

"Can I trade these in the three nicer nurses?"

Janice said, "I offered him Roland, Doctor, but for some reason or another he refused?"

"I can't imagine why Janice, the first time I walked into Roland I thought I walked into a wall. I wish I had walked into a wall, because he was walking the other way, and I wound up on my ass. That man has one hell of a sense of humor. He picked me up, using one hand, and held me off the floor with it. 

People look at him, and think he's an orderly, because he's big and black. They don't realize he graduated college 3.80 GPA, and nursing school with a 4.0. He's one of the best nurses on staff."

"Doctor, if he's that smart why didn't he go to medical school?"

"Doctor Luck, I asked him the same question. He said, "Doctors don't heal patients, nurses do. I want to work with people. I want to watch them heal, and ease their pain. Doctors never see that, only nurses do. That's the reason I wanted to be a nurse."

"You can't argue with his reasoning, or his dedication to his work. He is as tender with a child as he is with the elderly. Everyone here calls him a pussycat, because he is."

"Do you mean if I put him and Hannah in a ring together, Hannah would win?"

"The only way Hannah would lose is if Roland would fall on her, accidentally."

"Oh Lord, I am doomed."

I immediately tensed, or needed eyes in the back of my head to see which way I was going to get hit. It turned out it didn't matter. All three of them hit me at the same time, and with equal ferocity.

Jennifer turned my wheelchair towards her.

She looked at me sadly, and asked, "Did they hurt you baby?"

Then she bit my nose. I didn't see that one coming. I couldn't win for losing, and I wasn't going to win for at least two more months. There was a bright side. I could go to work, even if it was on a limited basis. I could see my beloved ship, my scientists, my engineers, and my friends on a daily basis. As Doctor Seine said, "I had no right to complain."

It felt like déjà vu all over again. Eight vials of blood, marrow taken out of my hip, a PET scan, MRI, CAT scan, and then my favorite of all the abdominal ultrasound. 

You ladies may be familiar with this one. The Republicans want you to have this one to make sure you are not beyond the 22-week pregnancy mark to have an abortion. There is only one problem in my case; I do not have a VAGINA. Do you want to guess where they stick this probe up? Yip, that monster goes right up the poop shoot, and the female technician that shoved it up there, I'm sure wore leather on the weekends.

"Relax Doctor this is a very easy exam if you relax."

She said that to me as she was smiling, putting a condom onto this monster, and holding it in front of my face.

"I'm sure you know the drill Doctor. Get onto your knees, get your backside high into the air, and breathe evenly."

Breathe evenly my ass. Then again, it was my ass. It wasn't as bad as I thought, it was worse. It burned like hell. I felt like I had to take a shit, but I did not feel pain. It was the constant burning feeling that annoyed me to the point of screaming. However, I was a man, and men don't scream. Like hell I didn't scream, I screamed until the walls in that room shook. I swear she put menthol on that probe. My ass was burning so badly, I thought it was on fire.

That test took six minutes, and I must have screamed for five of them. When the technician finally pulled the probe out of my ass, she said the bathroom is over there.

She was correct; I barely made it. If it was in my colon, it came rushing out. I think I lost 3 pounds.

When I walked back into the room, I said to her, "Why does it burn so badly. I felt no pain, but what did you lubricate that thing with; it burned like hell."

"That's why I wear earplugs Doctor Luck. It's part of the medication that is in the lubricant. It is helpful in seeing the pancreas and the liver. It's easier than opening you up again and taking a look."

"In that case, I guess I can live with it."

"Now that it's over with you can. I can always ask the Doctor if you want to do it again."

"Thank you, but I think I'll pass."

***************

Almost 6 hours had passed as they rolled me out the front door, hopefully not to see the inside of this building again. It had served its purpose, and me, very well.

The helicopters we purchased were sitting on the helipad waiting for us to depart. Jennifer was going to ride back with our security detail, or so she thought.

I made an agreement with Logan. If I was able to go home, Jennifer was going home, with me, in my helicopter. He was to give her a short acting anesthetic, and have two of his men put her in the helicopter and strap her in. If any of the nurses objected, they would to ride back with the security troops, in the SUVs."

We drove out to the helipads, and as was usual everyone followed me up a ramp. I turned to Jennifer, held her head in my hands, and kissed her.

As her head was steady, Logan jabbed her in the neck with the needle, and she was unconscious in seconds.

Hannah and Janice ran towards her believing she had fainted. They were surrounded by a phalanx of my security guards, and told what was happening.

Jennifer was carried to the helicopter and strapped in. I walked to the helicopter, waving at my nurses, with a huge grin on my face. I knew when I got home, I was going to pay dearly for this, but it was worth it.

Tammy climbed into the helicopter with us, because she was the most docile of my nurses. Even though I got the look she was noted for, I still was able to smile.

She checked Jennifer's pulse, and blood pressure, as we lifted off.

"You are a real prick Doctor Luck."

"You have called me a lot worse over the past six months. I can accept that."

The pilot came over the intercom. "Doctor, the nurses in number two would like to speak to you."

"I am sure they would Steven. Tell them my headset is not working, either that or my ears are not working."

"I'll go with number two Doctor. They will believe that one."

We were 40 minutes into the flight, when Jennifer began waking up. The first thing she noticed was the earphones on her head. Then it was the roar of the helicopters engine. The next thing that happened drowned out every bit of noise around us.

Jennifer saw me strapped into my seat, sitting across from her, and realized she was in a helicopter. She let out a scream that would have curdled God's blood.

"Get me down. Get me down on the ground. I want to be on the ground Even. You will never work another day in your life, if you don't put my feet on the ground in one minute. I will kill you where you sit. Do you hear me Doctor? You are a dead man. Get me down on the ground. I will kill our children I will kill you, and I will kill me. Get me down on the ground."

"Jennifer don't you think you're overreacting?"

"Overreacting my ass, the last time I was in one of these things it crashed. It's not going to happen to me again."

"So what you're saying is I should never fly again, because I was in an aircraft accident. That accident brought me to your door, after I walked 40 miles pulling my friend behind me. That meeting solidified my feelings for you, and that evening I asked you to marry me.

The next morning I should never have gotten on that airplane and flown home with you and Gordon to Denver.

We should have gotten onto a train, but there was none.

I guess we could have taken a bus, but again there was none.

I could have rented a car and driven the 6000 miles to Denver, over the worst roads and mountains imaginable, in Alaska, Canada, and the contiguous United States to get us home, and to get married. 

We should never have flown to New York, where we got the financing we needed to build our spacecraft.

We shouldn't have taken another aircraft to Charleston where we made the announcement for our venture into space.

We should never have flown back to Denver on another airplane to get home. Just think how many times I would have died in all those plane crashes. How stupid of me. I must have no sense at all. 

Flying is no way to die.

After all, airlines flew over 71 Trillion Passenger Miles in 2014, and including the aircraft that was shot down over the Ukraine, and the aircraft that landed short of the runway, in San Francisco, 562 people were killed.

I'm sure driving a motor vehicle is much safer. 

Only 100 people die in motor vehicles every weekday, and holiday. In the United States 33,600 people die every year on the roadways. Our people were less than 2 miles away from Margaret's home when they were hit by that truck. 

We lost Tonya. We almost lost Margaret. Liz had a punctured lung and a bruised heart. We could have lost the three of them due to one careless act."

"Why did this happen; a drunk driver didn't obey the law. He got behind the wheel of his truck, instead of calling for a taxi. He saved $30, and nearly killed three of our people in the process. We will watch this case very closely. If this gentleman gets off with a slap on the wrist, like vehicular homicide, I can guarantee you that certain people will make his life very short."

" Even no one can take the law into his own hands."

"I agree with you wholeheartedly."

"You just said at this man's life would be cut short."

"No one knows how long a person's life is supposed to be, do we?"

"Even you're playing with words."

"I nearly lost three of my people. Those are the only words I care about."

Over the intercom the pilot said, "Prepare for landing."

"You cock sucking sonofabitch. You did this to me purposely. Wait until I get you home. I'm going to beat the crap out of you."

"Tammy, you heard her. If I wind up with a battered and bruised body, you will know the reason why."

"Doctor Luck, if I didn't know what you were doing to her, I would've been on the floor laughing."

"Don't you start with me to Tammy?"

"How can't I Jennifer? You were ready to kill your entire family, until he got you to talking. Then you forgot everything you were going to do and listened to all the numbers he was spouting. He could've started giving you numbers from the sports pages, and you would have sat there listening to him. He hypnotizes you, and you are like a deer in the headlights. You are so in love with that man, you would do anything for him, including going into space."

"My children are going, what else am I supposed to do?"

I was stunned. "Baby, if that's the only reason you're going, don't go. You must never tell anyone what I'm about to tell you, because if you do he will know instantly it came from me. He may never talk to me again."

"Holden is not coming with us. He has his own plans, and they are great ones. I will not steal his future from him. I will not tell you what they are. He has a great mind, better than Gordon's and mine. He may even be smarter than Newton, and I heard that from Newton lips.

You know I will not live very long, while I am in space. My sister has told me so many times she is going to take me to her. I believe the best thing for us to do, if you wish to stay with Holden, is to sign divorce papers. Once our spacecraft has passed Pluto, and we get a message back to you that we have gone beyond light speed, you know I will not be returning. Have Rod serve them to the court for you. I will still have many hundreds of millions dollars left in my accounts thanks to Stephano.

He is only taking money equally from everyone instead of taking everything from me first. He thought it was only fair to do it that way. There is another surprise coming that I cannot tell you about, but it is a good one. You are wealthy in your own right, and you have our home in Idaho Springs. "

Jennifer was about to reply, when the wheels of the helicopter bounced on the ground. There were tears in her eyes. I knew she was conflicted. Should she stay with her husband, who was not going to live very long, or with her 10-year-old son who had a star filled future ahead of him?

We would discuss this in private, when we got home.

I looked at Tammy and she nodded her head. She knew this was not a topic to be bandied around with anyone, not even her fellow nurses.

******************

113. Is Anyone Ever Truly Prepared

"I'm home Lucius, what's going on?"

"I received a text from Paul. We are expecting 24 guests; he didn't say where they're coming from, when, or how. I've been in touch with Moorhead, and Patti Valentino.

Morehead swears that as soon as she gets word from the VP we will know seconds later. She is so frightened, I believe her.

Patti will have more information for us tomorrow afternoon on this group. I didn't ask how, but she is as good as they come with a computer."

"Why now Lucius, there's nothing going on?"

"The same thing ran through my mind general. I'm wondering if they're trying to catch us flat-footed. All I know is that when these guys hit the ground, they are going to disappear quickly. I am not going to kill them; I'm going to make them an offer they cannot refuse. Once upon a time, these guys were our warriors, and I believe they deserve a second chance. They are working for money, and I will offer them enough to disappear. If they accept it they live, if they don't, well that's their mistake."

"You seem to have this all worked out."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



"Yes sir, Jack, and I have this under control. You take care of Margaret, that's your job for now. Did you take care of her flowers?"

"Shit, I forgot. I don't have a key for her apartment."

"Her doorman does."

"Lucius, do you know everything about everything?"

"Yes sir, why do you ask?"

"Can I have the numbers to this week's lottery?"

"Sure, do you have pencil handy?"

"Go ahead Lucius, this ought to be fun."

"3, 18, 21, 24, 47, 52. Powerball number is 19."

"I'm going to lose a dollar on these numbers."

"You could win more than $270 million on those numbers. Remember, I think the betting closes at 8 PM tonight."

"I will get there before then. Let me know what happens with these people."

Dan left the pencil and paper on the counter. He took a shower, set the alarm for 5PM, and lay down to rest.

He felt like he was asleep for three minutes when the alarm went off. He groused at it, got out of bed shaved, dressed, and left for Margaret's apartment.

On the way there, they stopped to pick up a vase for flowers, hoping they had not been destroyed. The doorman let him in to the apartment, watched as he put the calla lilies into the vase and added water.

As Dan was leaving the doorman said, "You have to put ice cubes in with the flowers to help preserve them."

Dan looked at him. "You do it. I would probably screw it up."

After putting in 20 ice cubes, the doorman locked up Margaret's apartment. Dan gave him $100 to make sure her apartment was secure, while she was in the hospital.

As they were driving to the hospital, he saw a sign for the lottery. He reached into his pocket, and the piece of paper was not there. He realized he left it on the counter.

"The hell with it; I just save myself a few dollars."

He arrived at the hospital and went up to the intensive care unit. Margaret was not in her bed. He panicked. He ran to the nurse's station, which was unattended.

He yelled, "Where is everyone?"

"We have patient, be quiet."

"Where's Margaret?"

"She's taking a short walk to see if we can send her to a telemetry room."

"Okay, I'll find her."

He left the ICU, and looked down both hallways to see where she was. There were several people taking walks, while holding on to the poles holding their medications. Only a few were being assisted, and none of them was Margaret. He looked his right, and saw a small convoy of aides and nurses walking very slowly, and every once in a while, they would start laughing. He knew instinctively, his Margaret was there.

He walked quickly to catch up with them, and heard Margaret telling stories about him, when he was a young First Lieutenant.

"I have no idea how he made it through West Point. If I wasn't his secretary, they would have busted him down to private."

"You know that's not true Margaret. The lowest they could have put me was back at the Point, as a Plebe, and started to train me all over again."

"It might have helped you Dan, at least you would've learned how to spell."

"The Jesuits taught me how to spell at the end of the yardstick. How do you think I got to the Academy?"

"Your uncle was a congressman, that's the only reason you got in."

"When we get married Margaret, I am going to have to teach you some manners. You are no longer a corporal, who could yell at me at will, because you knew I wouldn't send you to the brig."

"If you sent me there you would still be a First Lieutenant."

"Ladies, as you can see, we are going to be a perfect couple."

Margaret, the nurses, and the aides, burst out into laughter.

Suddenly Margaret faltered. Eight pairs of hands reached for her, and held her steady, while she was placed into her wheelchair.

"Do you see the effect you have on me Dan? I can't even stand straight when you're here."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"Absolutely not, who else would I torture?"

"Let's get her back to her room. We have to check everything before she calms down."

After they hooked her back up to the machines, and listened to her heart, her nurse asked, "Who's on call?"

"Doctor Romotar."

"Get him up here now."

Margaret asked, "What's wrong with me?"

"I think you've developed a heart murmur."

"What is a heart murmur?"

"It's a problem with a valve in your heart. It can range from innocent, to requiring surgery. If it requires surgery don't have it done here."

Dan was on the phone instantly.

"Mister Zabo, I may be using our helicopters for a private reason. Margaret may need heart surgery. I will be flying her down to Austin, if she does."

"Dan, you don't need my permission to do something like that, just get it done. Give her our best. I will make sure the best heart surgeons are available for her when she gets there."

"Thank you Mister Zabo, I will keep you informed."

His next phone call was easy.

"Lucius get our helicopters ready to go to Austin. Margaret has a heart murmur. She may need surgery. I need one set up for a stretcher, a nurse and for me. The other set up for security."

"What the hell did you do to her this time?"

"I didn't do anything. They had her up for a walk, and she collapsed. They took her back to her room, hooked her up to the machines, and the nurse found it."

"I will arrange for a police convoy to get you back here safely, and the armored cars for you to bring Margaret here. You take care of her; I'll keep everything here in the control."

"You got it Lucius, thank you."

Doctor Romotar was at Margaret's side within moments. He looked at the telemetry, and listened to her heart. He called for an immediate CAT scan. The technician had left the hospital to pick up her child at daycare, before they closed for the night. There was no one to replace her. 

He took another look at the telemetry, and didn't have a choice.

"Miss Post, if I could perform the test I need, I could be better equipped to make this decision, but I can't. In an abundance of safety, I want to transfer you to Austin immediately. I will call for an ambulance to take you there."

"Doctor, don't worry about the ambulance; she's going by helicopter. I have it all arranged. Call the University, and tell them she is on her way. We will be there in 40 minutes."

"We will have her ready in 10 minutes to leave the hospital."

"Five minutes would be better Doctor."

"We will give it a try."

***************

They took Margaret out of the helicopter, placed her on a gurney, and rushed her through the doors and into the hospital. They ran so fast, Dan was hard-pressed to keep up with them.

They took her into preop, cut her gown away, poured liquid anesthetic over her chest, abdomen, and arms; they hooked her up to the electrocardiogram, while the anesthesiologist asked her questions. The cardiologist listened to her chest, while nurses inserted intravenous needles into her hand and elbow. They were ready to take him take her to the operating room, when she insisted on seeing Dan.

They threw a gown, gloves, mask on him, and let him in to see her.

"Danny, I know I'm not going to make it this time. I don't want you to be sad, or angry. We finally made it. We finally agreed that we have loved one another for more than 30 years. It just took us a long time to get here."

"Baby, don't you talk like that. This operation is done every day. It's a simple valve replacement, and your heart is strong. I will be waiting for you in recovery. I will be in the chapel praying, and waiting for you."

"I'll see you on the other side Danny. I'll be waiting for you."

"Don't you leave me Margaret; fight for your life, fight for us."

"I will try my best."

"Miss Post, the doctors are waiting."

"I love you Margaret, I always have."

"I love you Danny."

**************

Nine hours later, Jayden found Dan in the chapel meditating. He tapped him on the shoulder, which startled him.

"Dan, the surgeon wants to talk to you. From the look on his face, I don't think its good news."

Jayden made sure that the security team stayed close enough to keep Dan from killing the doctor, as he explained what happened to Margaret.

Dan was surprised by the greeting he got. "Hello General Morgan, my father served with you for nine years in Germany and the Balkans. His name is Major Alfred Goodman; he was a Doctor in your medical corp. When I heard you were coming, I googled your name, and realize you commanded my father's outfit. I called him to verify it, and he said yes."

"Now, I am sorry to say we lost Ms. Post, while she was on the operating table. It was not just a leaking valve in the left ventricle. She had a tear the size of a nickel, between the left and right ventricles of her heart. We had her on the heart-lung machine, and even through our best efforts, we could not seal it tight enough to hold. There is too much pressure in the left ventricle. Anything besides a new heart wall between the two sides of the heart would have ruptured in a matter of hours. They don't make those. 

There was nothing we could do to save her. I'm amazed the hospital in Temple, didn't pick it up. I'm sorry general, we did our best, but our best wasn't good enough today."

Dan had lost so many men in battle; he didn't cry. He would do that in private. He thanked Doctor Goodman for his efforts on Margaret's behalf, and asked when he would be able to take her home.

"General, the paperwork will be finished tomorrow. You can take her home the following morning."

"Thank you very much Doctor, I appreciate you trying to save her."

"Jayden, I don't feel much like talking. Would you call Lucius, and tell him what happened. Have him call Mister Zabo and Mister Valentino, and give them the news."

"Yes sir, I'll take care of it."

*****************

Lucius screamed 'NO', as if he had been hit by a hot branding iron. When he regained his composure, he asked, "Does Danny have his gun? If he does take it away from him. I don't care if you have to handcuff him to do it, but get that gun away from him. I want two men with him at all times, no exceptions. He is not allowed to give orders, which are not approved by me, or Mister Zabo. He is on indefinite leave of absence."

"I understand, and agree completely, Colonel."

"Did he cry, Jayden?"

"No sir he did not."

"That asshole, he's going to blow like a volcano."

"I know this is going to sound funny at a time like this, but ask him if he played the lottery tonight."

"How far away should I be standing sir?"

"I would have a door between you and him for safety."

"Remember I'm married. My wife will come after you if I'm dead."

"We have great insurance plan remember?"

"She will still want a piece of your hide Colonel."

"General Morgan, Lucius wants to know if you played the lottery tonight."

"Only that man could ask a stupid question like that at a time like this."

"Tell him I heard that, and ask him if that means no."

"The Colonel heard that sir, and wants to know if that meant no."

"Give me your phone for a moment; I want to ream a new ass hole into that bastard."

"Lucius, I'm in pain over losing Margaret. How could you possibly ask me about the lottery?"

"I know you're in pain over losing Margaret, so am I. If you had played them, as I told you to, you would be $285 million richer."

"You are a lying sack of shit."

"Use your smart phone and look up the lottery numbers."

"I left the sheet of paper on the counter in the kitchen."

"You are an absolute idiot Dan."

"Lucius, you are back on my shit list."

"Margaret would not be happy to hear that Dan."

"Okay, you're off it again."

"It takes you a while, but you do learn. Are we going to bury her here or in Massachusetts?"

"I never looked through her records that far, but I guess I'm going to have to do it. We will have a service for her here, and whatever her preference was we will take care of it then."

"Do you want me to take care of it Dan?"

"No this is something I have to do."

"Good boy Danny, you are growing up. Tell me when you're coming back, and I'll arrange a reception for her. I'll call everyone concerned."

"One more thing Dan, I knew your mind would be with Margaret, so I took the precaution of buying that lottery ticket for you. You are a very rich man. I was hoping to give it to Margaret and you as a wedding present. I'm sorry it didn't work out that way."

"You bought it Lucius, keep the money."

"Danny, I've worked for William for almost 30 years now. I'm successfully invested all over the world, because of him. This money is like a drop in the bucket compared to what I have."

"You and I have to talk Lucius; we have to have a long talk."

**************

William and Jemma were heartbroken when they heard of Margaret's death. William knew what she meant not only to Dan, and to Lucius, but to many other members, who held her in such high regard. He became determined to give her a sendoff as a member as a Member of the Team.

It was 4 o'clock in the morning, but no one refused to call from William Zabo regardless of the time.

***************

All scientists, staff, and security team members, except those on guard duty at the main building were to be at the NEST at 4 P.M. that afternoon. No reason was given.

*******************

At 1 PM, two tractor-trailers left a warehouse in Dallas. The drivers were begged not to get into an accident, and please don't be late. Their arrival time was scheduled for 3:45 PM. Their every move was tracked on GPS, and the bosses breathe when the trucks arrived at the gates to the NEST, at 3:30 PM.

"Where do you want me to bring this stuff?"

"Follow the SUV in front of you, and don't deviate, unless you want to be blown up driving through a minefield."

"A minefield, are you guys nuts? What the hell are you building here?"

"A spaceship."

"Oh, so this is the place they are doing it. Can we see it?"

"Only if you don't want to go home tonight."

"I don't think our wives, and kids would like that very much."

"Follow the truck, and don't go either side of the road. Your wives and kids will not like that either."

As the trucks drove off, Mel asked Steve, "When the hell did we put in a minefield?"

"Probably when you were out to lunch."

"You always tell me I am out to lunch."

"There's a reason for that Mel, trust me. If you weren't so deadly with that rifle, you would be working at Burger King."

"Remember that Steve, it could always go off by accident."

"That's why we don't give you real bullets."

"You're kidding, you gave me blanks?"

"I'll stand by that tree, and you can try to shoot me. You will only embarrass yourself in front of everyone here. Let me call the guys over so they can watch you make an ass out of yourself. Do you want to try?"

"No, but when do I get my real bullets?" 



"When we are under attack, which will be soon, very soon from what I've heard."

Everyone from the main building started showing up at 3:55, and proceeded towards the meeting point. Nearly the full contingent of 630 people were there waiting for instructions.

Stephano Valentino knew what was coming, because he cut the purchase order, and knew it was not coming out of company funds. He looked down at Patti and grinned.

"What are you grinning at Steph?"

"You look like a gnome with all these normal people around."

You would think after 24 years of marriage he would've known better than to say that to her. She could not reach his chin, but her foot could reach his ankle very easily, and it did.

"Ouch, you bitch."

"The next time you call me a gnome, I'll break it."

William and Jemma walked up to the front of the audience. William asked for quite.

"For those of you who do not know, I'm sorry to inform you that Margaret Post passed away last night, while Doctor's were performing heart surgery. Our hospital did not have the equipment to see her problem early enough to save her. It will have soon. Margaret was loved by many of us, and a friend to all of us. 

Margaret and General Morgan were to be married on Valentine's Day, here on this open field. Instead, tomorrow we will hold her funeral here.

These trucks contain everything you will need for tomorrow. Many of you have never worn black camouflage outfits in your life, and it will be new to you. Ask those amongst you who have, and they will help you. There are sizes for everyone, including Patti Valentino, which we had to fly in from Borneo, because a lot of short people live there."

"I'll get you for that William."

"You stay away from my husband Minnie Mouse."

"If you're not careful woman, I'll take you back to New York with me."

"Not now ladies, we have business to attend to. Gentlemen if you would unload the racks from the back of the truck and bring them inside we can get the process started. Ladies you can help with the boxes of shoes, because we all know how ladies love shoes."

*******************

The procession bringing Margaret's body home arrived shortly after 1 o'clock. Dan was in the hearse with her. He was amazed to see what had happened apparently overnight. 

As they raised the main gate, he saw a 10-man honor guard waiting on both sides of the road. The men and women were dressed in black, from their boots, to their necks. Their helmets look like polished brass. 

As the procession continued slowly towards the NEST, one rank moved out, to be joined by another, and another, leading the hearse in the direction of the stage.

Margaret had an honor guard of 30 men and women on each side of her, but that is not all. Every man and woman in the field was dressed exactly the same. Dan worried only him and his security team would be inappropriately dressed. 

As the hearse came to a stop, and he exited, his security team was no longer behind him. He realized they were no longer necessary.

Lucius stood at attention, as the six pallbearers took Margaret's casket and hoisted it up onto their shoulders.

Lucius yelled, "Company: ATTENTION."

Everyone in the field stood straight as an arrow.

As they were approaching the stage area, Jemma and Patti pulled Dan behind a screen.

"You have 90 seconds to change general, move it."

If you've ever been in the military, you know you can do a lot in 90 seconds. Changing uniforms is one of them. Dan had no problem making that time limit.

He walked out and exchanged places with Lucius, while William Zabo was still eulogizing Margaret.

Something was bothering Dan, and then it hit him.

"Lucius I want you to call Doctor Goodman, and ask him if the tear between the right and left side of Margaret's heart could have been caused by the automobile accident."

Lucius didn't bother answering him; he just disappeared into the hangar. He was connected to Doctor Goodman's office, while he was seeing patients. When he heard the phone call was in reference to Margaret Post he accepted the call.

"Doctor, this is Colonel Lucius Canyon, I am General Morgan's adjutant, and he has a question for you. Ms. Post was in a car accident 12 days before the heart murmur started. Could the accident have caused the hole between the two sides of the heart?"

Doctor Goodman did not hedge. "Yes Colonel, if the accident was severe enough. Were there any other passengers in the car?"

"Yes Doctor, one person died, and the driver had a punctured lung and a bruised heart. She was on the same side Margaret was. The car was hit broadside, by a drunk driver in a truck. The SUV she was in rolled over three times before it came to a rest on her side."

"There is your answer Colonel. You have one bruised heart, and another heart that couldn't withstand the torque of the spinning. I'll go over the x-rays and my notes. I'll send a copy to the Temple police, and to you. At the very least, it's vehicular homicide, or negligent homicide. In my book, it's murder."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



"It's the same in my book Doctor. Thank you very much."

As he rejoined the general, he tapped his hand. Dan looked down as Lucius nodded his head.

Dan said, "I'm going to kill that bastard."

"No you're not; he belongs to me, we agreed on that."

"I've changed my mind."

"Danny, you've got one arm in a sling, don't make me break your leg."

"Ladies and gentlemen, General Dan Morgan."

"We will discuss this later Lucius."

"This discussion is over."

********************

Margaret's request in her Last Will and Testament was to be cremated and her ashes spread in the Arboretum of the spacecraft. She knew she was too old to meet the parameters for the passengers, who would be flying into space, but she wanted to go with them. She also put in an addendum: "If that stubborn mule of mine ever decides to marry me, bury us in a joint plot in a place of his choosing."

Dan Morgan cried inconsolably. Lucius left the apartment to give his friend some time alone.

***************

114. Tightening the Screws

"Dad, we now owns 37% of Advanced Algorithms. Do you think that's enough for a takeover?"

"Are there any other large blocks of stock out there Patricia?"

"Yes there are three of them, but none of them add up to more than 26 %. Berkshire Hathaway owns 11%, American International owns 7%, and Morgan Stanley owns 8%."

"Patti let me call Warren, and see if he will sell me the 11%. If not, I'll see what it will cost me to have him vote his shares for me to take over the company."

"I love how you make it sound so easy dad."

"Patti, you could make that phone call. You are richer than he is. I am just better known than you are."

"Yes dad, but I don't have the balls to call him Warren."

"If you did, you would be my son, and not my daughter."

"Hysterical dad, absolutely hysterical, what are you going to do for your next trick?"

"With the price of fuel dropping down the way it is, I might buy an airline."

"Dad, you already own an airline."

"I know, but it's a tiny one, and it only serves Europe. I want to start one that will serve the Midwest. It will only go to airports that are underserved, and have high priced tickets. The big boys don't want to serve those airports, even though there moneymakers. You can make a fortune out there."

"You could lose your shirt too."

"I have a lot of shirts."

"Dad has anyone ever told you that you are impossible besides me?"

"Junior does all the time. When I tell them to look at his books and balance sheets, and I ask him how well he's doing because of what I've taught him, do you know what he says to me?"

"No dad, what does he say?"

"I love you dad."

"I love you too daddy, but you're still a pain in the ass."

"That is no way to talk to your aging father."

"Jemma and I would kill you if you died. So you better not think about it."

"You were at my last physical, so you know I'm healthy. I intend to stay that way. I want to see Patrick get married, and have another grandchild for me."

"Speaking of grandchildren, Anna will be getting married before the spacecraft leaves."

"Really, when did all this happen?"

"She met this boy while she was in graduate school, but she kept it a secret, because she was worried about me. I had to grow up before she would leave the nest. We had a heart-to-heart talk, and I told her I would be fine. I proved it by coming down here to be with Stephano for one month. I told her I was going to do it every other month just to prove to her that I was capable of leaving Glen Falls."

"What's the boy's name? What does he do?"

"This is not a joke dad. He was born during a hurricane so his parents named him Cloudy Day."

"That poor boy, can you imagine what happened when he went to school all these years?"

"He has an advantage over most men dad. He is 6'3" tall and weighs 200 pounds. Very few people make fun of his name."

"I can understand that, what does he do?"

"He's in his last year of college at the University of Virginia. He's going to be an engineer. Dycke is going to give him an internship at Schneider industries. I read Anna the riot act. I told her just because she is a billionaire, doesn't mean her husband is not going to work for a living."

"Good girl Patricia, very smart thinking. I want her to see one of my attorneys before she gets married. I want her money protected from him."

"I agreed dad, sometimes love will blind you. I don't want it to happen to her."

"Okay Patricia, I've got to call Warren before he goes out for his ice cream. I'll call you back later."

"Goodbye daddy."

*************

"Mister Buffett's office, how may I help you?"

"This is William Zabo for Mister Buffett."

"Yes Mister Zabo one moment."

"Hello William, what do you want to cheat out of me now?"

"Warren, I never try to cheat anything out of you, I only try to get the best deal I can."

"Is that why every time I hear you call; I back my chair up against the wall so you can't sneak up behind me?"

"No one has ever snuck up behind you Warren. You are almost as wealthy as I am. I have a favor to ask and I'm going to state it plainly. I own 37% of Advanced Algorithms. You own 11%. I will offer you a 10% premium over what you paid for it, or when I attempt to take over the company I want you to vote your stock with mine."

"What are you up to this time William?"

"Turn off your tape recorders and I'll tell you."

"Go ahead William they are off."

"The president of that company was supposed to be James Pierce. The real head of the company is our former vice president William Silver. The man who put my son in front of himself, because he thought there was an attempt on his life going on. 

I want to ruin him. I want to bankrupt him. I want to do anything I can to him, except put a bullet in his head, for what you saw him do to my son."

"What do you intend to do with the company after you have control?"

"Honestly Warren, I hadn't thought that far in advance. I was going to do what ever I could to make sure vice president suffered. If it was to drive the stock price down, I was going to drive it down. If it were to sell off the parts to another company, I would do it. Do you have anything in mind?"

"What if I asked you to sell me your 37% of the company, and I will take care of your problem. You would not be implicated, and it would just be another purchase for Berkshire Hathaway?"

"Do you swear the vice president will suffer?"

"He will lay prostrate on his friend's lawn crying." 

"There is something funny going on in that man's house Warren. He has armed guards patrolling the property with dogs 24/7. If the Corporation owns it, I would be very interested in finding out what he's hiding in there."

"I think I'll have a group of my people guarding the place from the outside so he can't steal anything, if it's company property."

"What a wonderful idea. I will have my people call yours and we will make a deal. There will be no squabbling over the price."

"I have never seen you so amenable William."

"You are getting revenge for what that bastard did to my son. I'm always amenable when someone does that for me. Just so your people don't have to do a search, Morgan Stanley owns 8%, and American International owns 7% of that company. I believe you have friends in both those concerns. It would put you over the 50% mark and there's nothing they can do to stop you from moving in on them."

"You had this all worked out didn't you William?"

"I never go hunting without a big gun. It might be nice to publicize that you're having the IRS, and the Justice Department go over their finances, because you believe they've committed a fraud against the government. It's why you bought the company."

"You are an evil man William. Positively evil; and brilliant, I'll take care of it over the weekend"

**************

It hit the Monday Morning financial news networks like a bolt out of the blue.

Berkshire Hathaway Swallows Up Advanced Algorithms

In a Hostile Takeover. Board of Directors Fired. 

Mister Buffett said he found a great many irregularities in the way the company did business. He has invited the IRS and the Justice Department to take a close look at the books and the executives involved. In another shocking development, he said James Pierce; the CEO of Advanced Algorithms may have been getting government contracts funneled to him by the former Senator, nee Vice President of the United States, William Silver, who is currently living at his estate, outside San Diego. The estate is currently surrounded by the FBI. They are awaiting a court order to search the premises.

***************

"You have to get a fucking helicopter in here Jim. I can't be caught in here with all those girls in the basement. I'll be crucified."

"You, what about me; they'll hang me by the balls. We have to cross into Mexico immediately, and get down to Peru. Maybe your friend can hide us for a while."

"You work on the helicopter; I'll make a phone call."

"Don't use the phones; use your cell, or use Skype, but stay off the land lines."

"I'll use the computer."

************

In the ready room, they intercepted the message from San Diego.

"Get this to Mister Zabo now."

Steve didn't wait for the elevator; he ran down the three levels to get to William's office.

He said to William's secretary, "Tell Mister Zabo we have an important intercept."

"I'm sorry Mister Zabo is at the NEST."

"Would you contact him for me please?"

"One moment, I'll get him on the line."

"I step out of my office for one hour, and the sky is falling. What's going on Steve?"

"We received an intercept from San Diego. The vice president and Jim Pierce are going to skip across the border to Mexico by helicopter. Then they are going to jet down to Peru. Apparently the president of Peru owes him big time."

Steve did not get an answer. William was already calling his friend, the assistant attorney general, to tell him what was going on, and see if he could stop it. Every second counted, and he knew it.

"Jeff, William Zabo, the vice president is going to try to hop the border in a helicopter, and jet down to Peru. Can you stop him?"

"I'll talk to you later William."

The Assistant Attorney General, called the Director of the FBI, who called the Special Agent in Charge of the operation around James Pierce's mansion. He told him to use all the force necessary to keep those two men on the property and disable any helicopter that tried to land or take off.

The SAIC said, "I'm sorry Mister Director the helicopter took off a minute ago."

"Do not wait for the search warrant; consider the house a crime scene. Arrest the guards, and anyone who tries to stop you from gaining entrance to the house. Use extreme caution; you don't know what those two bastards did in there. Keep in touch with me every 15 minutes; I want to know what's in there that made those two jokers run."

************

"We missed that bastard by a minute, one lousy minute."

"William, I don't think the Feds would've opened fire on the helicopter, even though they were authorized to do so. They're squeamish that way. They're not like my team and me; we would've made toast out of it. They have to think about lawyers, and politicians reaming their asses off."

"It all depends on what they find in the house. If it were loaded with cocaine, or other drugs they would come out fine. You're right they had to follow the rules."

"Speaking of rules William, the truck driver comes out of detox next week, and goes before the judge to seek bond. Unfortunately, he doesn't have a lawyer. I don't want us to get involved with a lawyer directly. The lawyer should be someone local, who gets a check from some aging drunken cowboy."

"Do you know anyone like that, because I don't?"

"I haven't got a clue. We have 290 agents that work for us. One of them has to know what cowboy fits that description."

"Why are you still sitting here; it sounds like you have work to do."

"You always leave me the hard stuff. I should have it done by the end of the day."

"I'll tell Jemma to set and extra plate for dinner."

"In that case, I definitely will have it done by the end of the day."

"Thank God you're my friend Lucius; otherwise I'd have to kill you."

"I would kill myself first before I hurt you my friend."

"Go to work, I hate eating cold food."

*************

The Special Agent in Charge told the guard closest to the driveway that they were about to pull the gate open and arrest all of them. They were to gather by the driveway, lay down their weapons, keep the dogs on a tight leash, and lay on the ground. Any man or dog disobeying these orders would be shot.

These men were superbly trained, and very well paid to perform the duty of protecting the perimeter of the estate. They were also not stupid. They watched their boss run for the hills, and knew their last payday had run away with him. They followed the FBI's orders, and became extremely helpful in searching both the grounds, and the area very close to the house. None of them had ever been inside, but they knew how to open the ramp that let the golf carts go in and out of the basement.

As the ramp appeared, the lights in the basement turned. No sound was heard. A phalanx of six FBI agents, with their weapons drawn walked down the ramp slowly looking for any traps, or wires that could set off an explosion; there were none. As they entered the main area, and saw the jail cells, with the tiny girls in them, the lead agent said, "Those men are not human. No human being could do this to a child."

He said to the little girls, "You will be free soon. We are with the FBI. We have to take pictures of you as you are so we can present them in court to put the animals that did this to you in jail for the rest of their lives. We will do this as quickly as possible, and get you out of there. 

"Joseph, Angel, get every camera we have, and get it down here. The quicker we take these pictures, the quicker these girls will be free. Call for ambulances, doctors, and counselors. They are going to need all the help they can get."

The Special Agent in Charge approached the first cell, and sat down on the floor. The little girl in the cell backed away from him. He was a big man, and she was afraid of him.

"Little one, my name is Fred Deering. I have worked for the FBI for 24 years. I have never seen anything like this before. I can't imagine how terrified you must have been of the two men who did these terrible things to you. I promise you all your pain and suffering is over now. No matter where you go from this point on, you are going to have my card with you. If anyone ever places a hand on you, and you don't like it, you are to call me. Wherever I am, and whatever I'm doing, I will stop, and I will come to your aid. I will help you with your situation, until you are able to smile again. I will not leave your side. If it takes a day, or if it takes a year, I will not leave you until you have a smile on your pretty face. I will be your friend forever. Is that okay with you?"

Huddled in her corner, with her raggedy blanket pulled around her, she cried out, "He hurt me, and if I cried he wouldn't give me food. He took me from a store, where my mom and I were shopping. He put something over my mouth and I could not stay awake. When I did I was here."

"How old were you when he took you from your mom?"

"I was eight years old."

"What is your name?"

"Cathy, Catherine Burgess."

"Cathy, you will be happy to know your mommy and daddy are still looking for you. They never gave up hope that they would find you. I will have them meet you at the hospital. Sometimes it's a little overwhelming for the first few days, with everything that's going to happen to you, but it will all be good. It will all be to help you. 

There is one thing I need you to do now. I know this is going to sound strange, but it is very important. I need you to touch my hand."

"Why, why do I have to touch your hand?"

"Everyone who has touched you in the last two and half years has hurt you. I need you to touch me so you know the people who are here now are going to help you. They are not here to hurt you. I am one of those people, and there are many more on the way. You have to relearn to trust people, and I'm going to be first. Please touch my hand."

Fred stuck his hand through the bars and waited for Cathy to move. She sat in the back of her cell, clutching her blanket, as if she was glued to the wall.

Fred didn't talk, and Cathy didn't move. Seconds turned into minutes, minutes into moments. Fred's arm began to get tired. It was a case of the irresistible force, meeting the immovable object. One of them was going to win sooner or later. 

Finally, Fred said, "Touch my arm Cathy; it's going to break soon."

There was a hint of a smile on her face as she moved away from the wall, and move towards him. She touched his arm tentatively, and then touched it again. This time she did not move her hand from it. She was trembling with fear, but she continued moving forward. When she reached the bars that separated them she asked, "Would you hold me?"

"It would be my pleasure."

With only the bars separating them, Fred wrapped his arms around this tiny, frail creature, and tried to spread his warmth into her body.

Cathy turned her face into his chest and began to sob. It had been so long since someone touched her with kindness in their hearts; she had forgotten what it felt like.

Joseph, Angel, and three other agents ran into the basement and began taking 'Still' and 'Motion' pictures of the little girls, and their jail cell habitats. They took pictures of, and catalogued everything that was in the basement. It sickened even the most seasoned agent to think these objects were used on such little girls.

"Had the human race sunk so low that we defile babies?"

(Looking at the atrocities that are happening daily, in the Middle East, Eurasia, and Africa, unfortunately the answer is yes.)

The agents did not interrogate the young girls. They were all under age and a parent was needed. However, the girls volunteered information about the killings of girls, who became too old to satisfy their Master.

It became very evident to everyone who listened that there was only one pervert involved, and that was Jim Pierce. William Silver never touched any of these under age children. If that was the case, why did he run?

Sirens wailed as fire rescue units arrived on the scene. Fred told Angel to advise everyone that only females were allowed to touch these girls. They were victims of multiple years of rape, sodomy, and abuse. They would all need the tender touch of the female to get them on to the gurneys and to the hospital for treatment. Then they would start calling the parents to advise them their children were alive.

After that, a worldwide alert would go out for the capture and extradition to the United States of the two criminals: James Pierce, and William Silver. The charges included "Murder, Kidnapping, Child Endangerment, and Sexual Assault on a Minor..."

************

While walking around a presidential retreat east of Lima, in the heart of cocaine country, William handed Jim the English newspaper showing what they were charged with back in the states.

"I can never go back there, because of you and your penchant for little girls. I'll never get my revenge on that bastard Zabo now."

"I don't understand it William, I really don't. First, our money disappeared, and then without a whisper of warning, Berkshire takes over the company. It's the first time Buffett has been involved in a hostile takeover; it's not his style."

"Well it's all over the financial news. He amassed 53% of the company by buying little bits here and there, and not having the stock price jitter even a little bit. That is his style. He is a master at it. The brutal part is he's having the government check the books before his people move in. If that's not the smartest move I've ever heard of, I don't know what is."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



"Nobody ever called that man dumb."

William separated himself from James Pierce. When he was 15 feet away, he called to him.

Jim turned, "Yes William?"

He was looking at three men pointing automatic weapons in his direction.

"You screwed me for the last time Jim. You've lost my money; you've lost my company; now you've lost my ability to move around my own country. Three strikes and you're out. Goodbye Jim."

It's a useless gesture trying to protect your face against Kalashnikov rifles, but I guess if you can't see the bullets tearing into your body it might help. James Pierce was dead before his body hit the ground.

***************

Lucius received a phone call. "Hello Colonel, everyone here is running for cover just in case there are records at Pierce's mansion. I think you can scratch the visitors who were supposed to come your way."

"That's great news Paul. Why don't you hang around for a few days? Act anxious, but not afraid. If they question you just tell them you were going to act as guards for some secret operation out of Advanced Algorithms. You didn't know when it was supposed to happen, or where, but you were all on alert because it was supposed to happen soon. They can't do anything to you for being on the payroll."

"Yes sir, any other instructions?"

"How is your Spanish?"

"Living down here this long, I speak it like a native."

"Get a lot of sun Paul; you may be going down to Peru."

"Colonel, I'm beginning to think you don't like me."

"Whatever gave you that idea Sergeant?"

"Would you like the long answer or the short answer?"

"It wouldn't matter to me Paul; I'm going to tell you you're wrong either way."

"That's about what I thought sir. I'll call you back at the end of the week."

"There is one more thing Paul."

"What's that sir?"

"Go to a firing range, a really long firing range; a mile or a mile and an eighth should do it. Get good at it; get really good at it, and also keep your legs in running shape. It may just save your life."

"Am I going to be doing this alone sir?"

"Have I ever sent you on a mission alone Paul?"

"No sir, but normally you are the point man; and I'm backing you up."

"You've been promoted Paul. You are the point man, and the member of your team who will be going with you will be taking your place as the backup. I am training him now."

"That's great Colonel that means this mission is 30 years away. That's how many years it took you to get me this good."

"This is the information age Paul. I've changed my methods."

"Is he still living sir. I remember the old way and how you trained me."

"That's why the new way is better. We only simulate the pain. I'll talk to you at the end of the week Paul. Shoot straight, and shoot a lot."

"I'm going to be thinking about that tree on Vancouver Island sir."

"Don't do it Paul, it will only depress you."

"Goodbye Colonel, have a good one."

******************

"Where are you sending him now Lucius?"

"It's summer in South America William. I hear Machu Picchu is a big tourist attraction at this time of year."

"He's going to Machu Picchu to see the ancient ruins, like I'm going to Las Vegas to gamble."

"Paul is excellent at ruining people's days."

"Since this just happened yesterday, who have you been training for months to do this?"

"Everyone, of course, but now there's only one other requirement I have to build in. The person has to speak fluent Spanish. Would you like to see volunteers line up at your door within 10 minutes?"

"Not even I think as evilly as you do. I can't wait to hear this."

"You are going to love it William, trust me."

"All agents, this is Colonel Canyon. Continue with your jobs and listen up. We have a job opening that requires the following: one single male or female, available for long distance travel within the following week. Your employment here continues while you are away. While you are away, your salary will be supplemented on a basis you will be told privately later. This job is hazardous to the extreme. You will be number two to an extremely knowledgeable point man. I repeat man. The destination is Peru, and you all know who flew down there recently. Part of your mission is to come back here alive; the other part is to make sure he doesn't. You must be able to run at altitudes of 5000 feet for miles, without getting tired. Your life will depend on it. There is one other requirement. Whoever gets to Mister Zabo's office first is not guaranteed to get the job. He or she will get $10,000 for showing enthusiasm, and tenacity for wanting to get this job. You guards standing in the building laughing, because you have a 14-minute advantage from the gate to the front door will step outside. A secretary will say go at the exact second I say go, and you will start running around the building until your 14 minutes is up. One second early and you're disqualified.

Here is the final qualification, and when I'm finished I will say go. The agent that wants this job must speak fluent, that means like a native, Spanish."

"GO!"

Initially, it looked like a mob scene. Everyone took off towards the gate. After a few hundred yards, the jokesters started peeling off and the serious contenders for the job moved on towards the road that would lead them from the NEST, to the main building.

Lucius got on the loudspeakers again. If you people jogging around the building think you're fooling anyone, you're not. My great grandmother could run faster than you are. I'll be down there taking names momentarily.

Pouring rocket fuel on their asses and having a lighted match in his hand wouldn't have made his agents move any faster than the threat by Colonel Canyon. By the time he stepped out the front door the agents were running at flank speed.

Barbara said, "I'm not sure if it's what you said or how you said it Colonel, but it worked."

"Do you mean they were slacking off before?"

"You didn't check the screens Colonel?"

"No, I was leaving Mister Zabo's office, and I always like to give my troops a little encouragement."

"Well Colonel, it worked, here they come again."

"I'm going to yell at you, so don't take any offense. It's only an act."

"Go ahead Colonel; I don't listen to my husband when he yells either."

"You haven't been keeping a log on how many hours these men spend in the gym? Don't you know how many hours each man spends lifting weights? You don't know how many times they do leg presses. Our lives depend on the fitness levels of these people. You are fired. Get your things and get out of this building."

As the men turned the corner of the building, Lucius asked, "Did they turned the heads Barbara?"

"Barbara, Barbara, Barbara are you alright?"

Sniffling between breaths, Barbara replied, "Colonel, I need this job."

"Barbara I told you I was going to yell at you, don't you remember?"

"Yes, but you didn't say you were going to fire me."

Lucius shook his head, and thought, "Oh God."

He put his arms around her, and patted her on the back. "Barbara, it was all an act. I told you that. I wanted them to feel bad, not you. You are doing an excellent job. I would never fire you. You are part of our administrative team. We wouldn't know where to go without you working beside us. We just lost Margaret; everything would stop if we lost you. All the women here are the backbone of this project. If you don't think so, ask Mister Valentino if he could run his office without them. I'll tell you something you don't know. You make more money than the three of us do; Mister Valentino, Mister Zabo, or myself."

"You're lying. You are the top three executives of the company and you expect me to believe we make more money than you do?"

"We have a few minutes let's go to your office."

"Okay now what do you want to do?"

"Call Mister Valentino's office, and tell his secretary I would like to speak to him. Then you can put it on speaker."

"What do you want Lucius I'm busy."

"Is Patti still here?"

"Yes she is."

"Is she on your desk or under it?"

"That's none of your concern; what do you want Lucius?"

"I want you to triple my salary."

"Done, now leave me alone."

"What does that bring my salary to?"

"The same thing it was before you asshole, zero. If you multiply 0×0 for 1 million times you still come up with zero you idiot."

"Thank you Stephano, you may continue pleasing your wife now."

"Do you believe me now Barbara?"

"Why, you work seven days a week, more hours than anyone else here, and you don't get anything in return?"

"William Zabo is my best and most valued friend. I have known and worked for him in different capacities for almost 30 years. I found out someone was trying to kill him and his son, Patrick. I called him, and warned him about the threats. He said he would take the appropriate action. I told him no, I would.

If I were to live, he were to die, and I knew I could have done something to stop it, I would put a gun into my mouth and blow my brains out. That's how good William Zabo has been to me."

They heard a rumble by the front door. Then they heard glass shatter. A fight broke out, and a man groaned. 

He yelled, "Bitch," as he tried to regain his feet and strength and charged after the female, who was now in the lead. 

Lucius picked up his cell phone. 

"Yes."

Lucius yelled, "STAMPEDE coming your way, use extreme caution."

"Get down here you asshole."

"I'm sorry sir, I'm out to lunch."

"That's the first time I've heard you tell the truth in a long time."

Cynthia, William's secretary, took the precaution of sitting on her desk, with her knees against her chest, and her back against the wall. It was a little airy under her skirt, but she could live with that for the time being.

The first person into William's office was a female, followed by a hand that had a strong hold on her hair. Unfortunately, the race was over.

"I'm going to kill you Lucille. You bit my pointer."

"How lucky can a girl get on her first try?"

"It might be your first try on me, but it seems that mouth knew exactly where to go."

"It has travel that road before, and also the road less traveled, and both are sweet."

William said, "I take it you're name is Lucille, but we have not been formally introduced. I am William Zabo."

"Yes sir, I know. My name is Lucille Ball. I'm not joking sir. My name is Lucille Ball. My parents were big fans of the real Lucille, and they branded me with that name."

"Your red hair comes genetically, it's easy to tell."

"Yes Mister Zabo, I cannot tell you how many beauticians compliment me on whoever colored my hair before them. They're so disappointed to find out that is my own."

"Were both your parents Hispanic?"

"Yes sir."

"What about you young man? Still chasing women around hallways trying to pull their hair?"

"I wasn't trying sir, I had it. However, she turned into your office, so I did not pull on it. She won; she cheated, but she won."

"You are correct. All that counted today was winning. There were no other rules being applied. You could have cut her head off and been within the rules, so you lost. Isn't that right?"

"Yes sir you are correct."

"You must not have wanted the job very badly."

"I want this job very badly sir. However, you have to look at the competition and watch what your own parameters are. We were told to get from point A to point B as quickly as possible. We have to be able to run at high altitudes for long periods of time without getting tired. We are going to be number two to a very experienced shooter, who is going to attempt to take out the former vice president of the United States, who is now a guest of the president of Peru. This puts it outside of any legal United States sanction. However, if we are able to do this it makes everything here for our spacecraft a cakewalk, because we no longer have to worry about what that idiot is thinking. We also have to speak Spanish, which will help us blend in to the community depending on the color of our skin, and how well we speak the language. How well did I do sir?"

"You did very well, but you still didn't tell me your name."

"I apologize for that Mister Zabo. My name is Rory Calhoun."

"How did Miss Ball beat you Mister Calhoun?"

"I was purposely running behind her right shoulder for about half a mile, giving her something to think about as we were approaching the building. We were about 20 feet from it, when she purposely slowed to trip me. I pulled her down with me just to get even with her. I was starting to get up when she bit my pointer. I screamed, she got up, laughed, and began running. I got up a second later and chased her but I was not quick enough to get here before she did."

"She bit you on your pointer?"

"Yes sir, my penis, my dick."

"Oh well, we did say there were no rules. Miss Ball, take this to Mister Valentino and pick up your checkup for $10,000, and report to the Colonel tomorrow morning. You are no longer on your regular rotation; you belong to him. May God have mercy on your body, and your soul."

"Mister Calhoun, take this to Mister Valentino and pick up your checkup for $9999.99, and report to the Colonel tomorrow morning. You are no longer on your regular rotation you belong to him. May God have mercy on your body and your soul."

"William, why are you scaring them that way? I am a really nice person when you get to know me."

"I've known you for 30 years, that's why I warned them about you."

"They need plenty of rest tonight, and they won't get it because of you. Do you see how inconsiderate you were?"

"Maybe we should give them the rest of the day off?"

"Are you trying to ruin my entire day?"

"Get lost you two, pick up your winnings, finish your shift, and come to work tomorrow as you are now, but bring gym clothing with you."

"Thank you Colonel, we will see you tomorrow morning."

***************

115. The Return

It was a gray, blustery Monday morning, but you could not prove it by me. I had a spring in my step and a song in my heart. I had a smile on my face that had everyone in the house laughing.

"Dad, you're not going to get laid, you going to work."

"Like you son, I got laid last night, and I'm looking forward to going back to work for the first time in nearly 9 months. My brain is on overload with all the things it wants to get out of it, and all the things it wants to do, I hope it remembers it all."

My soon to be 'fairy daughter', handed me a briefcase with my initials on it. It contained my voice recorder, and discs.

Zoie kissed me. "Dad, your brains are in here, just in case the one above your shoulders goes haywire, while you're at work."

I couldn't control my emotional outburst, in return for remembering what I had totally forgotten. For months prior to getting my laptop computer, I dictated everything I could think of onto these magical discs, and had forgotten about them. Now I treasured each hour I spent talking into that infernal device, because I had a permanent record of what had gone through my mind, while I was recuperating.

I grabbed Zoie and kissed her. Then not knowing about her weakness, I began tickling her. She screamed bloody-murder that she was going to kill Gordon for giving out her secret, as she lie on the floor recuperating from my attack on her ribs.

My son helped her up and swore he had not mentioned it to anyone, especially not me. I corroborated his story, and probably saved his life that morning.

Gordon left for work at 6:50 with Monty and Cindy at his side, and a chase car following along behind them. I wanted to leave, but Janice sat there eating her breakfast, like a snail in a long distance race. I had no chance of leaving before 7:30 AM as planned.

I watched her take the smallest portion of scrambled eggs on her fork, put it in her mouth and chew it 32 times before swallowing. 

I couldn't take it any longer. I got up from the table, walked back to my bedroom, and lay down on my bed. I prayed to my God to give me enough strength not to kill her, before we left for work. Then I did the unthinkable; I closed my eyes, and fell asleep.

You see, God does have the weirdest sense of humor.

Jennifer shook me, and when my eyes opened, she asked if I was feeling all right.

I told her I was fine. I'm just waiting for Janice to finish her breakfast.

Jen told me it was time to leave.

Instead, I pulled her down on top of me, and she screamed. 

"Mrs. Luck, I just wanted to say thank you for putting up with me through all this impossible time. I know I have not been the best patient, the best husband, or the best partner. Now that I'm going back to work, I will also be absent from your life a great deal of the time. Have I ever told you how lucky I am to have you in my life?"

"Mister Luck, you are a pain in the ass. However, I love your ass. I love everything above it, below it. I also love what is in front of it. Now let me up, and go to work. I want to see you happy again, and you haven't been happy since the day you found out you were ill."

"How can a woman be so wrong so often? I was happy when I was in the hospital. I told you to go into the bathroom and remove your bra and panties. After that day, I had a lot of fun with you. My mind was bored, but my libido was very happy."

"If you don't let me out of this bed soon, your libido is going to be very happy again, but your brain is going to be very angry at it."

Holden walked into the room, "Whoops, I'm sorry," and walked back out. 

We heard him say, "We have time, they are at it again."

Jennifer yelled, "We are not, we are just talking." She jumped off me, grabbed my hand, and pulled me into a sitting position.

"If you are available, and have enough energy left in your body tonight, we can continue that discussion Doctor."

"If you are going to be on top Mrs. Luck, I won't need much energy. I'll just nurse on those wonderful breasts of yours."

"Will you at least set the table for dinner?"

"I thought Zoie did that?"

"Doctor Luck, go to work before I break your legs."

"Your wish is my command Mrs. Luck. If you happen to be in the area around 1 PM, I'll take you to lunch in the cafeteria."

"My husband the big spender. Go to work, now."

As much as I hated leaving my beautiful wife, I wanted to get back to my real life. My Science, I missed it so much.

We left a little late, but I didn't know what the hurry was for us to get there on time. I found out as soon as we turned into the rear parking lot. The entire staff was there waiting for me. William was standing at the front as I exited the car, and everyone began applauding.

He grabbed me. "Welcome back Even if you break one of your nurse's rules, I'll kill you."

"It's good to be back William. If I break any of their rules, you won't have a chance to kill me. They will have done it already. You are the best friend any man could ever hope to have. You have saved my project, and I am forever in your debt."

"Debt, Even my accountants are begging me to give away more money, which I have already started doing at an alarming rate. They don't know what to do with all the money that's coming in from the patents this project has created. Patti has the same problem. She's thinking of buying Rhode Island. I told her not to do it, because of global warming.

There is a rumor going around that someone's wife will be staying on Earth after he leaves on a trip to outer space to take care of her youngest son, because he does not want to make the trip with us. Of course, we don't believe this rumor for one second. However, just in case it turns out to be true, we have put every penny of this man's investment into the project back into his account in her name. She will be able to take care of this young child, and bring his dreams to fruition someday. I'll make sure William Junior becomes an investor in those projects as part of my Will."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 23



"You are an amazing man William. Only four people know about that possibility, and I know two of them have never spoken of it. Thank you my friend, thank you very much."

"I've kept you from your public too long. Say hello Doctor, and get to work. They don't call me the slave driver for nothing."

"It will be my pleasure, I guarantee you."

I waded in to the throngs of people who waited to greet me, and began fearing for Holden's life. I picked him up onto my shoulders. I was quickly relieved of him by one of my agents. I turned and looked into Janice's eyes, and could see the disapproval in them.

She yelled, "One more time and you're going home."

I yelled back, "Over my dead body."

She smiled at me, put her hand in her pocket, and pulled out three syringes, each with a different colored tip.

I said to her, "You are fired."

She laughed. "I owned your ass for two more months and longer if you're not good. Please don't be good."

That shut me up in a hurry."

William got onto the microphone and told everyone it was time to get back to work, and that included the newly resurrected me, Doctor Even Luck.

There was a great cheer at the mention of my name, and everyone filed into the building. Gray waited for me by the door, and we hugged as we walked in together.

"Dad, I can't tell you how many times I've looked at that empty space next to me and wished you were working there. The things you could've solved for me in seconds took me days, or weeks to figure out. I cannot begin to explain how happy I am that you are back."

"That goes for me too dad," Gordon said.

Richard piped in, and said, "Me three dad."

I went to pick Richard up, but remembered my earlier warning from Janice. Therefore, I just ruffled his hair.

"Where do they have you working young man?"

"They have me right next to Gordon dad. At first I was annoying him with all my questions, but now I am working very well on my own."

"Yes he is dad. You should see some of the work he's putting out. You will be very proud of him."

"I am proud of each and every member of my family, because of how they have continued to work magnificently while I was away. Any father would be proud to have you as his sons. I hugged I Gray, Gordon, and Richard, with tears in my eyes.

Then there was this acidic voice behind me. "The four of you have been screwing off long enough, get to work."

No one had to look to see who it was. The edgy part of her voice was enough.

Gray said, "Yes dear."

Gordon said, "Hello preggo," and ran before her leg could reach his body

Richard was not old enough to scare easily. "Hello Delicious, how is your belly doing today?"

"Teddy is doing gymnastics this morning. She's getting ready to pop out anytime now."

"Can I watch when she does?"

"It's all messy and disgusting when she pops out. She's covered with blood and other goop. If you want to watch, it's okay with me, but you have to ask dad for permission."

He looked at me with those big brown eyes, and I punted. "We will have to get permission from your mother. If she says it's okay, it's fine with me."

"Gee dad thanks a lot."

Delicious frowned at me, because she knew what I just did.

"Yes Delicious, even though you are not a son, I'm very proud of you. You are very special to me and you understand why."

"You are so lucky I can't beat the hell out of you. That was the furthest left, of left-handed compliments I have ever received. Not even my husband has gone that far for fear of losing his family jewels, or his life."

"I would miss the first part the most dear."

"I would be very careful of what I ate for dinner tonight DEAR."

"You have to have four more children dear. You can't kill me yet."

"As always you are correct my love. I have to have four more children. No one said who the father had to be."

"I am not going to divorce you, but I will follow you into confession. I will get the names of the men who impregnate you, and make sure their genitals never work again."

"That would be a mortal sin on your soul."

"No, I don't think so. I would be making sure my wife would not be committing adultery with the same man ever again. I would be protecting what is mine according to our marriage contract."

"Gray you are a pain in my ass."

"What a wonderful thought."

"When you talking about now husband?"

"I was just referring to the sentence where you said, "I was a pain in your ass." I could do that, can you?"

I said, "Children cover your ears."

"Deviant."

"Whore."

"I've only been with one man."

"You just said you wanted to be with four more, while still married to me."

"You are a pigheaded bastard."

"I told you years ago to watch that mouth of yours."

"What are you going to do about it?"

"I'm going to wash your mouth out with lye soap, if you continue this behavior."

"I will take my children and leave you."

"I will go into space, and leave you here."

"That is not your decision to make."

I said, "You are absolutely correct Delicious, it's my decision."

"Daddy, you wouldn't dare."

"Watch me."

"Teddy is supposed to go with you. If I keep her with me, the trip will be a disaster."

"You are right again Delicious. Seventy people will die in space, because you are an obstinate bitch. Give me your security passes, I don't want you in this building anymore. You are a disruptive influence."

She handed me her passes with tears in her eyes. I said, with no emotion in my voice, "You can leave now. Your expertise is no longer necessary to this operation."

I lied. I knew she was integral to the success of this operation, but I couldn't let her know it, until she changed her ways.

Her eyes fluttered. "Dad."

"Don't forget to take Newton with you."

My grandson said, "Can I stay with Richard?"

"It's fine with me, but that's a decision for your mother and father to make."

Gray knelt down by his son, and explained, "Mommy doesn't want me in her life anymore. She is going to take you and Teddy away from me. I can't fight with her now, but our lawyers will fight over you later. I will fight very hard to get both of you back into my life. Right now, the best thing for you to do is to go with her. I will try to see you on the weekends. I will have a lawyer by then."

"Don't you love mommy anymore?"

"I think I love her very much, but the way she has been treating me lately, I'm beginning to wonder why I love her."

Delicious turned and ran crying out the building, leaving Newton with Gray. I called security and told them not to leave her alone.

My next call was to Jennifer. I told her storm clouds were forming over the house across the street.

"What did you do to my daughter this time?"

"Honest dear, it wasn't me. It wasn't Gray. She has a bug up her bum, and I don't know what it is. Talk to her for us please. Find out what's bothering her. I am going to need her here soon, but not the way she is. I took away her security cards to show her I was serious."

"You have no idea what's going on with her?"

"You've been in the house with me every time she's come over. Did you notice anything wrong with her?"

"No, she seemed fine to me."

"The same here. I think it's time for some soul-searching. She left without taking Newton, and we told her to take him with her."

"I'm going to walk across the street and sit on her steps until she arrives. I'll see how she reacts when she sees me."

"Good luck dear; don't let her get the first punch in. We have plans for tonight."

"Is sex all you men ever think about?"

"No, we think about food too."

"You are in such trouble when you get home."

"You have work to do, get to it."

************

As they pulled to a stop in front of her house, and Delicious saw her mom sitting on the steps of her home, she was furious. She got out of the SUV, slammed the door, and said, "Go home, I don't want to talk to you."

Jennifer responded, "Great I don't want you to talk either. If you do I will stuffed my fist down your throat for acting like a child. Get in the fucking house, before I have your escorts tie you up like a pig and throw you in it."

"You haven't..."

Jennifer nodded her head, and before Delicious knew what was happening she was on the floor with her legs and arms being tied together behind her back. When she started to scream, a cloth was put into her mouth, and sealed with a piece of tape.

"Gentlemen, would you please deposit my daughter on the kitchen table. I want to insult her, face to face, while I'm sitting down."

In a very unladylike position, they picked up Delicious, and carried her, just inches above the ground, into the house and deposited her on the table.

"Thank you gentlemen, that will be all for now."

"Now Queen Bitch, I am going to talk, and you are going to listen. I'm not sure exactly when it started to happen, but everyone has noticed it. Over the past year and a half, you have regressed to being a 16-year old child, acting on every impulse your heart desires. There are certain times you come back to us as a sweet adult, but most of the time, you are a raving lunatic.

Newton comes to us and asks, "What's wrong with my mommy?"

How many times can we tell him that you are under a great deal of stress? How many times can we tell him it's because of the hormone changes in your body, because you are pregnant? We are tired of lying to him about you. Today you did each of us a favor and blew up in front of him. Gray finally had enough and told your son the truth. 'Mommy doesn't want me in her life anymore.'

When Newton asked him if he didn't love you anymore his answer was true, and perfect for the situation. "I think I love her very much, but the way she's been treating me lately, I'm beginning to wonder why I love her."

Everyone here has been so focused on your father you wouldn't believe anything else would get through. Your relationship with Gray got through loud and clear. Everything Newton would say to Richard, or Holden would come to Even and me. Both of us would speak to Grayson. He was so upset about the situation in his home, he cried. He had no idea what to do, or how to change the dynamics between the two of you. 

He told us when he arrived home the first thing he would do is hold you, kiss you, and tell you how lovely you looked. He never said an unkind word. When he was home, he took care of Newton, and let you do whatever you felt like doing. He would rub your feet and your back, while you were in bed and anything else you liked him to do to ease the stress on your body. He tried to be the best husband he could be, but nothing seemed to work. You were always a bitch, and he couldn't change it no matter how hard he tried.

When you showed up at the main building, you always had an edge on your voice. Everyone has treated you with deference not wanting to set you off. It was as if they were walking on eggshells, when you were there.

You were lucky you never walked into William, or Stephano. They would have spoken with your father first, but if he could not rectify the situation, they would have fired you.

You are very important to the success of this project, but you are not irreplaceable. It may take two, three, or possibly four people to do your job, but they would hire them in order to keep a harmonious workplace, and get rid of you."

"You are rich, why don't you go back to Maine and start your life over again. You can show all those poor people up there that you've made it in the big leagues. You can hang your patent on the wall, and show all the high school students that made fun of you how smart you are.

You can tell them you went your marriage bed a virgin, and they all missed out on it because they bought your act as being a diseased slut. You can show them pictures of your wedding, and tell them you own half a railroad. You are in the big time, while they are all piddly little people, working in insignificant jobs. It's what you're doing now to all the people here working on our spacecraft, and we don't want you anymore.

Let me change that. We want the woman we used to have; the great scientist, the loving woman, the great wife, and the wonderful mother. If you can give us that back, you can stay. If you can't, get your divorce, and leave. I will tell you one thing; you better get one hell of an attorney. William will get Gray the best divorce attorney living. There will be no one testifying in your behalf. They will be telling the truth about your behavior, and your actions. When your trial is over, Gray will have permanent custody of the children, and you may be living in a mental institution for a very long time."

"Would you like to say something now?"

Delicious nodded her head rapidly.

Jennifer pulled the tape off her mouth, and the handkerchief out of it.

Delicious screamed, "Teddy, there's something wrong with Teddy."

"This doesn't change anything."

"Get help, something is wrong with Teddy."

Two agents rushed into the house, and cut her bonds. 

They picked up Delicious up, rushed her to the waiting vehicle, and sped off towards the hospital.

In seconds everyone at the main building new what was happening.

Even saw Janice coming at him with a needle.

"Janice, so help me God, I will kill you if you try to stick me with that thing."

"I will take your readings when we get to the hospital. If they are out of whack, you are going to sleep just as you kill me."

"Agreed."

****************

The ER was ready for her, when she was pushed through the doors. A baby monitor was put on her stomach, while intravenous lines were introduced into Delicious wrists.

Doctor Finch listened, and looked at the readouts from the baby monitor.

"I need a sonogram now. Get an OR ready for an emergency C-section."

I walked into the ER holding Newton by one hand and Richard in the other.

Newton said, "Grandpa, Teddy has a rope caught around her neck."

I went over to Doctor Finch. "Don't wait for the sonogram. Teddy has her cord wrapped around her neck. She's choking on it."

"How do you know sir?"

"Doc, Teddy has the cord wrapped around her neck. Take care of it now."

Doctor Finch didn't wait. "Let's go people, OR 2 now."

Delicious looked forlorn as they pulled her out of the cubicle, and moved her past us. As she was passing Gray, and he didn't make a move to touch her, or wish her well, she yelled his name.

He stood there like a stone, until every man and woman within reach was beating the shit out of him. He finally got the message.

He was by her side as they were turning through the double doors.

Janice said, "Your arm Doctor, or your neck? Please fight with me."

I sat in a chair and stuck my arm out.

Jennifer sat next to me, and grinned. "Janice, you've done a wonderful job of training him."

"I don't think it's me so much as it is Hannah. The Doc is no fun anymore."

She put the little thingy on my finger to check my blood oxygen absorption rate, took my blood pressure, and checked my pulse. She put her weapons back into their cases, checked my carotid arteries, and my eyes. When she was finished, she looked at my beloved wife and said, "Shit, he's fine."

I sprung out of my chair, grabbed her, and began dancing around the emergency room.

Jennifer was laughing like crazy.

I looked at her and said, "What's your problem lady?"

"Doctor Luck, I guess you forgot you can't dance. No one here will ever forget what you just did."

I looked around the room, and everyone, healthy, sick, or visiting, were looking at the crazy person that made an ass out of himself in a display of euphoric happiness. Oh well, SHIT HAPPENS!

****************

"Grandpa, I can't hear Teddy anymore. Is she going be all right?"

"Do you remember how you told Holden that the asteroid was going to miss the earth and why."

"Yes, it was going to miss us, because we are leaving in December, and it is going to get here in July."

"Newton, who is going to take over from me?"

My grandson smiled. "Teddy is; she's going to be fine. Thank you grandpa."

"The reason you can't hear Teddy now, is because her mommy has been given an anesthetic, which puts her to sleep. It may have put Teddy to sleep also. She will be waking up soon. I hope she doesn't start talking as soon as she comes out."

"Teddy can only talk to me, at least only for a little time longer."

"It will be fun to see what she says when she can speak to everyone."

*****************

"It is definitely a girl Mrs. and Mister Thyme. You didn't get here a second too soon. She had the cord wrapped around her neck twice, and that is very unusual. I am not an obstetrician, but I've read up on these, and most do not come out with a happy ending. I'm very glad this one did. How early is she?"

"She wasn't due for five more weeks Doctor."

"Isabel, what does she weigh?"

"Do you want to know about her mouth or her body?"

"Be nice Isabel her parents are here."

"She is 4 lbs. 4 oz. and 16 inches long. Her mouth registers 96 dbs."

Gray said, "Close, but not as big as her mother's."

He wondered why he did not get hit, and when he looked at Delicious, he saw she was looking away from him, and crying.

He leaned down and whispered into her ear, "Why?

"Mom told me what I've turned into, and I don't like me. I won't inflict that person on anyone I love. They will start hating me, as much as I hate being me. I will be leaving Temple, and I will be moving back home to Maine.

You can have both kids. You are great father, and a wonderful husband. You deserve someone so much better than I turned out to be. I will have a lawyer contact you so we can divorce easily.

When Teddy is ready to go home you pick her up, I will be gone.

If you would tell everyone downstairs that I am fine, but I don't want any company I would appreciate it. Goodbye Gray."

"I have no say in your plans at all? You are throwing my marriage out the window, because you are feeling sorry for yourself?"

"Excuse me, I know this is a bad time, but we have to take Mrs. Thyme to her room."

Gray asked, "Have you put all the knives away?"

"Not yet, we have several we haven't put in the sterilizer yet."

"Are you in a hurry to put them in the sterilizer?"

"Not really, we still have to clean up OR 3. That will take us 20 minutes or so. Just make sure the knife is in the same place when you bring it back."

"I'll be sure to do that thank you."

***************

As they finished setting her up in room 369, Gray walked back into the room.

"I told everyone that you were fine but didn't want any company. I said they could go see the baby, but to please honor your wishes and leave you alone.

Your father looked at me for a long time. Then he said, "She's running away isn't she?"

When I said, "Yes," his body slumped, and his color visibly changed. Janice had a needle in his neck an instant later. They have him in a room downstairs under observation. The people that were here to care for you are with him now.

I was going to fight for you. I was going to fight like hell to keep the four of us together. If you needed help, I was going to get you the best. If you needed to get away from us for a while, I was going to send you anywhere you wanted to go. Whatever you needed, I was willing to try it to save our marriage, because I love you so.

I remember the day I first saw you and I knew you were the one. I just knew it. I knew it was going to be a brutal beginning, and it was. After we got married everything was wonderful, I couldn't have asked God for anything more than you. You weren't perfect, but neither was I. However, we made one hell of the team. You are the only person I knew who could burn water, and then go into the lab and make use of it.

I've never known anyone, man or woman, smarter than you are. If you ask anyone to explain how your gravity engines work they still shake their heads when they walk away. When you start talking about your Ion/H2 engines, the best physicists in the world don't understand how a 17-year-old girl came up with that concept, without having access to a computer the size of a football field and the power to run it.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

***** 

116. Tying Up Some Loose Ends 

The driver of the truck was let out of jail, miraculously, even though it was his third offense. It was due to a good attorney, and $30,000 in bail put up by a 'Former Rodeo Champion.' Lucius had his men in place to follow the perpetrator, whether he walked home, or took a taxi. He wasn't 30 feet from the courthouse steps, when a shot rang out hitting him in the head, and splashing his brains all over the pavement. 

Lucius yelled over the radio, "Who did that?" 

All the answers came back in the negative. 

The police were everywhere within a matter of seconds. They questioned everyone on the street to see if they saw the person who did it, or anyone suspicious. No one did. No cars moved away from the scene quickly. No one was seen running away from the scene of the crime. Everything looked, and seemed normal. 

What no one saw was Liz closing the small opening to the rear door of her rented van. While everyone looked around, she broke down her rifle, put it back in its case, returned to the driver's seat, and waited for traffic to start moving past the scene of the crime. When it did, she moved into the flow of traffic, rubbernecked as every other driver did, when she past the crime scene, and moved on. The bastard that killed Tonya and Margaret had paid for his crimes. 

She returned to work, for the first time since the accident, the next day. 

**************** 

There wasn't a hair's breath in the qualifications, between Lucille Ball, and Rory Calhoun. They both spoke Spanish fluently, they were great shots, and could run long distances well. More importantly, they were great spotters. They used the new scopes, with the barometric and temperature readings on them perfectly, and helped the shooters with corrections on their aiming points, if they were asked. 

In the jungles of South America, the humidity alone could make a bullet fall nearly 3 inches per mile. The temperature made that number rise or fall. 

They could not simulate that anywhere in the United States, not even in Louisiana, during the heat of the summer. 

Paul would have to use his brain, and a little calculus to figure that out on the fly. These new scopes would help, but they were not always perfect. They could always try to get closer to the subject, and make the shot from there. However, that meant they would have to move undetected, that much further to get away. 

It was decided that they would become a threesome. Rory and Lucille would act as a married couple from Guadalajara. Paul was a widow from Mexico City. 

They arrived in Lima Peru with all the appropriate tourist information about the indigenous tribes. They were going on guided tours to Machu Picchu, and to the Headwater of the Amazon River, high in the Andes Mountains. 

The trek to the Headwater of the Amazon just happened to pass within 50 km of the presidential retreat, where William Silver was staying. 

It was also in the heart of cocaine country, which the bus they would be traveling on passed through. It was often detained, and searched by guards of the cartel, but the passengers were never robbed, or killed. The cartel was appropriately paid for each trip through its heartland by the bus company. 

In a country, where money can buy you anything, William Zabo bought the Commanding General of the Peruvian Army. He promised General Antonio de la Fernando Rios one of two things. He would be dead within 48 hours, or he would be $20 million richer if he followed instructions. General Rios chose door number two. 

William gave the general the coordinates he wanted his army units to attack, on what days and at what times to start, and stop. General Rios was told American satellites would be watching every moment of this operation, and if he did not comply completely, he would collect every penny of his money back by removing the general's skin, inch by inch, while he was begging for mercy. 

During these attacks, the cartels would be obliged to split their forces to protect its territories, laboratories, warehouses, and most important, their coca plants. These attacks would leave a narrow passageway for Paul, Rita, and Rory to get through, hopefully unseen. If it worked, the three of them would have no trouble infiltrating the area, and get to the presidential retreat. 

Exfiltration was a problem all its own. 

As the three of them waited in line to board the bus, Paul attached an explosive charge between the right rear tires. He would set off this explosive, when they reached the appropriate coordinates. 

They were lucky that the conductor of the bus forced the people, who got on first, to move to the rear of the bus, instead of allowing them to take up the front seats, blocking everyone else's entrance. Most of the passengers were either Americans, or British, and it was hard for them to maintain their Latin cover, with everyone else speaking English. 

As they drove along the route, the driver commented that there were no guards on the road today, and it was highly unusual. 

Lucille asked him why it was so unusual." 

The conductor replied, "The cartels own this area. They grow the coca plants here, and they don't want anyone looking around." 

"Does the government know about this?" 

"Yes, everyone knows about this, especially the government. However, the cartels are so strong; the government is powerless to do anything about it." 

She said, "It is the same thing in Mexico." 

Paul checked the GPS coordinates continuously, and when they were at the correct coordinates, he signaled his two comrades, and pushed the button. 

The explosion lifted the bus a few feet in the air, while throwing the right two tires and rims off the axle. The bus skidded 30 feet, before it came to a halt. 

Everyone on the bus was screaming, as the conductor was begging everyone to remain calm. He was going outside to see what had happened. 

When the conductor started yelling, the three of them got out to see what had happened. 

Rory said to him, "It looks like you hit a landmine." 

Lucille agreed. "Maybe that's why there are no guards on the roads today." 

The conductor said, "I can't fix this. I only have one tire. However, the wheels and bolts are gone also. This is a disaster." 

"How far is the closest town?" 

"We past it nearly 1 ½ hours ago; it's nearly 51 km from here." 

"If you will give us something to identify ourselves, and explain what happened here, we will walk to the town, and do our best to get help. You can't leave these people alone, the gringos will panic." 

"I will give you the pass that allows us to go through this area. If anyone stops you, show it to them, and they will let you pass." 

"We will probably not get there until nightfall. Do you think they will chance coming back here at night?" 

"No, they will come here in the morning. No one travels this road at night if they want to live. We will see you in the morning. Have a safe journey my friends." 

************* 

As soon as it was safe, they slid into the jungle, and began running southeast towards the presidential retreat. Within 10 minutes, they were in the coca fields, where billions, and billions of dollars worth of young coca plants were growing. In a few months, they would be harvested, processed, and made into cocaine, before making their way north to Mexico and the United States. It would feed the habits of millions of addicted Americans, and making millionaires out of criminals. 

Paul said, "Oh what I wouldn't give for a plane loaded with 'Agent Orange' right now." 

They found a trail, large enough for a truck to carry a load of coca plants to a processing center. They were sure they were running towards it, so they each had their pistols at the ready. 

Breathlessly, Lucille asked, "Where the hell is everyone today?" 

"Hopefully, they bought into William's diversion." 

"What diversion?" 

"He didn't tell you?" 

"Would I be asking you, if he did?" 

"William bought a General. He had him start an attack to draw off all the guards from this area to give us a fighting chance to get in without getting killed. I thought it was very nice of him." 

"How much did that cost him?" 

"How old are you Lucille?" 

"You never ask a lady her age." 

"I never look a gift horse in the mouth." 

"Did he pay enough for us to get out?" 

"I didn't ask." 

"Don't you think you should have?" 

"Possibly." 

He looked at his GPS, and they were moving too far south, and not enough East for his liking. However, the road they were running on was making their trek much faster than hacking through the jungle. They were still out in the open after running 20 km through fields of coca. He shook his head thinking that US spy satellites probably had this place fixed down to the centimeter, but the Peruvian government probably didn't care one bit." 

At 25 km, they finally reached the edge of the coca fields, and the road. Instead of heading into the jungle, Paul turned them and ran east, along the edge of the coca field. The field was so huge they were able to run east far enough to get back on course. 

That's when it happened. The skies opened up, and the rain poured down. The three of them ran deep into the jungle for cover and continued southeast bound, but at a lot slower pace using animal trails. They did not have machetes to cut through the dense jungle brush. 

Rain in the jungle is an annoyance, rather than out in the open, where it is a deluge. You get dripped on from every available leaf, until you are soaked to the bone. The high canopy takes in most of the water. What it doesn't want or need, comes down to the secondary levels were most fruits, berries and seeds grow to feed the animals and birds. What's left comes down to the lower plants, leaves, ground, and tree roots. It leaves the jungle floor moist, for the most part, but sometimes the floor gets muddy, if the rain lasts long enough. 

This time it was just a torrential thunderstorm that lasted 10 minutes and was gone. The jungle floor was basically dry, but every time they hit a leaf, their clothes got wetter and wetter. Soon they were dripping, just like the leaves. 

As soon as Paul saw an opening in the forest, with a bright sunny spot, he called a halt. He had everyone rest, eat, and change clothes from their backpacks. They went from their travel summer whites, into their full military camouflage gear. Lucy and Rory assembled their M-16s with sound suppressors, while Paul stayed with his handgun, but put a silencer on it. His sniper rifle stayed disassembled in his backpack. 

"Okay boy and girl, seven more clicks to go. Let's not screw this up now. Stay alert, and stay sharp." 

********************** 

Lucille said, "It looks like they're setting up on the veranda for a light repast boss. Range to the bouquet in the middle of the table is 1822 meters. The wind is 6 knots from the Northwest, temperature is 88 degrees, and the humidity is 96%. 

"Rory, we are going to take this high spot. Cover us over with branches and leaves first. Then throw whatever other stuff that looks like garbage on us, until everything around us looks like it slopes off from 3 feet down. The only opening I want at this moment is for the Lucy's scope. When they sit down at the table, if anyone is around us, use my handgun, or your knife to take them down. The less noise the better?" 

"Whatever you say boss." 

"One more thing, if you get back, and I don't, tell the Colonel it has always been my honor to serve with him." 

"We are all getting back sir." 

"We will see, we will see. We've been very lucky so far. Let's get a move on it, Rory, cover us over." 

************** 

"Is that too heavy Paul?" 

"No, we can slide out the front easily enough. How do we look?" 

"You look like a pile of compost back home." 

"That will do it. Get lost in the woods. Keep a 50-meter perimeter watch around us. No talking after this." 

Rory did not reply. 

This is the part all good snipers did, because they were trained to do it. They waited without fidgeting. A snake could crawl across their hands or neck, and they wouldn't move. A spider, a scorpion could do it, and nothing bothered them. Fire ants wouldn't sting them because they never knew they were there. 

Lucille was not trained to be a sniper, and she was going nuts. Every time she moved, Paul looked at her. He didn't know how many times he looked at her but it was once too many. He grabbed her by the back of the head and forced her face into the ground. After a minute, he let her up. 

The next time she did it he held her down for two minutes. 

The next time was three minutes. 

She begged, "Please, I can't do four." 

He growled. "If you move, we will find out, won't we?" 

Lucy never moved again. 

After 90 minutes she said, "We have movement on the veranda. They are bringing out melons, and other cut fruit. Here comes the rolling bar. The band is coming outside, and is playing. They are having a party." 

"Let me know when you see him on the patio." 

Paul put together his Remington 700, checked loading port for dust or dirt, and inserted the magazine filled with Remington's .338 Magnum Lapua rounds. He loaded one round into the chamber, turned on the laser indicator, and opened the tripod. He was ready. 

(The Lapua rounds were invented by a Finnish/British Consortium, which gave them a maximum range of over 2700 yards. 

Remington asked the US government, "How many times are you going to try to kill another sniper 2 miles away. 

Our ammunition will go 1700 yards, kill the sniper, go through the concrete wall behind him, and the wall behind that wall. If anyone is hiding in there, they are in for a very rude awakening." 

In a head-to-head competition in 2012, using almost 20,000 rounds of each type of ammunition, Remington's ammunition, beat the Finnish/British ammunition handily.) 

"We have men and women moving onto the patio." 

"I don't care about men and women, is he on the patio?" 

"No he is not." 

"I'm uncovering." 

Paul opened a 9-inch hole in front of him. It was just enough to rest the barrel of his gun on its tripod, and for him to see through his laser-designator scope. He fixed it on the open patio door, and waited. 

Moments later Lucy said, "I have movement just beyond the door." 

They walked out side-by-side, Alejandro Hector de Toledo, the President of Peru; and William Silver, the former vice president of the United States. 

Paul zeroed in on an area 4 inches left, and 11 inches above William Silver's ear to compensate for the wind, heat, and humidity. With the practice ease of a superbly trained marksman, he squeezed the trigger gently. As soon as the projectile cleared the end of the rifle, he ejected the spent cartridge, and inserted another round of ammunition into the chamber to set up for another shot, if needed. He didn't. 

While the projectile was still in flight, Alejandro leaned his head in front of William's to listen to something he was saying, over the noise made by the musicians. 

What happened next caused Paul to say, "Oh fuck. Get out of here Lucy. Crawl; don't stand up. Crawl, and crawl fast." 

As Lucy made her escape, Paul smashed the scope, and buried it. He ejected the magazine, took out an ampule of liquid from his vest pocket, snapped it open, and poured it down the barrel of the rifle. It started to smolder immediately. He buried the Remington deep under the branches, pulled down the ceiling of their hideout from his side, making it as dense as possible and slid to Lucy's side. He pulled down her side, while escaping through her opening. On the front of their hide, he pulled down more branches to cover their escape point. He made sure it looked as natural as possible. When he was finished, he took a quick look around the area to verify there were no signs of humans' being in that area. Satisfied, he started crawling towards the others. He made sure not to drag the toes of his boots, leaving a trail for someone to follow. The Colonel would have killed him if he made that rookie mistake. 

When he met them, he said, "We have to move fast." 

He grabbed his backpack, put it on, and began running, flat out. 

Rory yelled, "Did you get him?" 

"Oh yeah, I got him." 

"What's the problem? I don't understand?" 

"I killed Alejandro Toledo with the same shot." 

"Oh fuck." 

Lucille yelled, "Guys, shouldn't we ditch these clothes first?" 

"No, not yet, not until we are clear of the jungle." 

"Now I know why the Colonel wanted to know if we could run." 

"That's right boys and girls, because we are going to run a marathon all the way to that little town." 

***************** 

Paul kept checking his GPS; trying to get as close to the coca fields as possible. He didn't know, or care if it was dumb luck, or if he was that good a navigator, but he ran right into the same coca fields that got them to the presidential retreat. 

"Stop, let's rest and change. We have to bury our military equipment and clothes, and get into our civvies. Keep your knives pistols, passports, and identification papers on you. Remember with tourists." 

Lucy complained, "I love getting into wet clothes." 

"They won't be wet long; they will be full of sweat." 

"Thanks, that I needed to know." 

************ 

Paul said, "We are going to take the short way to the main road this time, and hope no one is at home to see us. Instead of staying by the trees and then going up the dirt road, we are going to run through the coca fields to where the dirt road meets the forest and out to the street the bus took us. It will save us more than five running miles. The only drawback is if someone sees us, and calls out the troops. If that happens, we are in deep shit. Whatever happens, keep running. Once we reach the forest at the far end of this field, we can get lost forever. If they get too close to us, split up and cross the road, and get lost in the jungle. We all know our destination, try to work your way back there. The only people who know what we look like are the bus driver and the passengers, and they are in the opposite direction. The people who are going to be chasing us don't know that. Okay, let's move out. Run, run hard, and run fast." 

"Is there any other way?" 

"You volunteered for this job, don't start complaining now." 

"It's a woman's right to complain." 

"In that case, go find a woman to complain to." 

**************** 

William's money or luck was on their side, because they made it back to the main road, without being seen. They turned west and continued running towards the little town, and help. 

They had a backup plan they hoped they didn't have to use it, because they were all dog-tired. It was a good thing they did however, because they heard a vehicle coming their way nearly four hours later. 

They picked up Lucille and started carrying her as they walked. 

Three men, in an unmarked car stopped in front of them. When they got out, they were wearing police uniforms. They walked towards them, with their guns drawn. 

"Who are you and what are you doing in this area?" 

They put Lucille down, and Rory held onto her. 

Paul said. "We are members of a tour group. We were on a bus, and two rear tires exploded. The conductor stayed with the bus, and the other passengers to keep them calm. We are going to a town to get help. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



My friend's wife sprained her ankle. She slipped and fell, after the rain, and we had to carry her. That is what slowed us down. I have the bus conductor's area pass to prove I am telling the truth." 

"Let me see it." 

Paul took it out of his breast pocket and handed it to the police officer. 

The officer returned to his car, and used his radio to verify our story. Then he walked back towards them, but did not return the pass to Paul. 

"The bus missed its next checkpoint. We thought it had been robbed. We were on our way to see if there were any survivors. How far up the road is it?" 

"How far are we from the town?" 

"You are less than 1 km away." 

"The bus is 50 km that way." 

"You walked 50 km?" 

"Did you expect the gringos to do it?" 

The officer laughed, "No, I guess not. The doctor is waiting for you in town." 

The three officers got back into their car and drove towards the disabled bus. 

Rory and Paul started walking when Lucy yelled, "What about me? Pick me up boys, chop-chop. I have to look injured." 

What they said to her could not be used in polite company. 

************** 

Lucille was used as a scapegoat again the next morning. This time she had severe cramps, and could not possibly continue the trip. 

They took a cab back to Lima, where all hell was breaking loose. The news of President Toledo's assassination was all over the media. Since it happened in the middle of cocaine country, the cartels were being blamed. 

The cartels said it wasn't their doing. They said it was General Antonio De La Fernando Rios, attempting to take over the nation in a military coup. 

General Rios said to the press, "If I was trying to take over the country, I would be in Lima in front of the National Assembly Building, and the Presidential Palace. I'm in the jungle fighting the cartels trying to get rid of the people who are trying to make our country the drug capital of the world." 

Finger pointing was everywhere. The National Assembly was called into session to form a new government. New elections would be scheduled as soon as a temporary head of state was appointed. 

The television commentator added, "One of our president's guests, William Silver, the former vice president of the United States, was accidentally killed during the assassination of our president. The bullet went through President Toledo's body, and hit Mr. Silver killing him." 

***************** 

Paul called the Colonel. 

"Hello sir, it's me." 

"Hell of a shot Paul; in one ear out the other; and right through the bastard's throat. I wish I was there to see it." 

"I did see it sir, and I still don't believe it. I will tell you all about it when we get home. Where am I going now?" 

"Temple Texas my boy; you deserve a rest. Rent a private jet to Austin, Texas, and come straight home." 

"We are on our way sir." 

"Lucille, Rory, it's time to buy some new clothes. We are to go home in style." 

Lucille asked, "What about our tickets?" 

"If you want to go home by coach, you go right ahead. Rory and I are going home on a private jet." 

"Fuck the tickets; I'm going home with you guys." 

"Remember, you must look the part of a well-heeled traveler. It's all on the boss." 

Paul was never married. He never learned the lesson of telling a woman she has carte blanche to shop. When they met at the airport at 12 o'clock the next day, he wondered if the Colonel was going to kill him. 

Lucille was gold from the tips of her hair, to the tips of her pointed shoes. Her hair was styled phenomenally, with flakes of gold filtered into it. Her nails were white with flakes of gold. Her eyes were lined with black and gold highlights. Her dress, what there was of it, was white and gold, with a wide white belt, and a huge gold buckle. He knew she was not wearing a bra, because her nipples were clearly visible. He would bet a year's salary her panties were gold; if she was wearing any, under that piece of spandex she called a dress. 

Rory's mouth was stuck in the open position. Paul tried to close it twice, but it kept opening, because his jaw muscles were slack. 

Finally, Paul yelled, "RORY, your cock is on the floor." 

That got through to Rory's brain. He reached for his zipper. He looked at Paul and asked, "Did I make that much of a fool of myself?" 

"Rory, you and every other red-blooded male in the terminal had his mouth open." 

Lucille tilted her head a little and asked, "Do I look that hot boys?" 

Paul smiled. "Did the Colonel remind you that when we get back I'm in charge of training?" 

"You're lying." 

"The Colonel was a Lieutenant when I enlisted the Army. I've been with him ever since. He inhales, and I exhale for him. Does that answer your question?" 

"I'm going to enjoy today and tomorrow, because when I go back to work, I think you're going to kill me." 

"I have never killed any of my people, because death is the easy way out. I believe in suffering. Suffering means you come back to me the next day and suffer again, and again, and again. Ask the Colonel, he taught me by using that training method. I have used it on more than 10,000 recruits in my time with the Army. Now I have the opportunity to do it with 297 agents who will get to know me intimately. It's time to board our aircraft children. I understand the champagne on board is the finest. Just remember the day after tomorrow, we start training." 

Lucille's smile and enthusiasm were 'Gone with the Wind.' 

Paul smiled all the way to the aircraft. When Lucy couldn't see him, he winked at Rory. 

On the six-hour flight from Lima, Peru to Austin, Texas, both men gorged themselves on the wonderful prawn appetizers, gourmet meal, and expensive champagne. 

Lucille picked at her food, and drank water. 

***************** 

After they landed at Austin, and were congratulated on a job extremely well done, Lucy asked the Colonel if Paul was going to be the training instructor. 

"No, Paul is going to be in charge of special operations, like the one you were on. He's too valuable an asset to waste as a training instructor." 

Lucy dropped her purse and Paul took off running. 

Paul had a distinct advantage. He was wearing shoes. Lucy was wearing 'Fuck Me Heels.' 

Lucius asked Rory what was going on. 

After hearing the story, Lucius started to laugh. He hadn't laughed since Margaret died, and it felt good. 

When they were close enough, he yelled, "ATTENTION!" 

Paul stopped instantly, and braced, ramrod straight. 

Lucy couldn't stop, because of her heels. She ran into Paul's back, but he didn't move. She stepped back and assumed the position. 

"REST." 

"Are you finished Miss Ball?" 

"Do you know what that son of a bitch did to me sir?" 

"Are you of legal age Miss Ball?" 

"Yes sir." 

"Are you able to make decisions on your own?" 

"Yes sir." 

"Do you believe everything you read, see, or are told?" 

"No sir." 

"Then whose fault was it that you did not enjoy your flight home?" 

"It was my fault sir." 

"Are we ready to proceed back to the NEST?" 

"Yes sir." 

"Excellent, you can ride with Paul. He has a lot to teach you, because I trained him." 

"Thank you very much sir. Can I kill him on the way?" 

"I could give you a rocket propelled grenade, with a 10 second head start. You could not pull the trigger before he killed you." 

"That's not possible." 

"He saved my life, in the Balkans, doing it. Paul, you are bunking with me tonight, which is nothing unusual. I have to hear about that shot." 

"Yes sir." 

"You two have your own domiciles. You will be driven straight there. Come to the main building at 2 PM, and we will straighten out your finances. Let's move out." 

"One more thing; you two were on vacation. You will not talk about this little adventure at all. Am I clear about this?" 

"Yes sir, very clear." 

*************** 

117. Fast-forward 

(I am jumping forward, at this point, to late April. Work is still continuing at a frenetic pace on the spacecraft, but there have been no major hurdles to overcome. With the former vice president out of the way permanently, and no more fears of being attacked from outside, everyone's attention was now focused on the spacecraft itself. What else could possibly go wrong?) 

Security had not dropped off one bit with the probability of an attack taken off the table. However, every time Dan looked at the shelf across his office, he would see Margaret's ashes sitting there. He not only got angry with himself, he got angry at the entire world. He would push the red panic button, with his knee, at least twice a week, which sent agents running to their security positions. 

After months of this aggravation, and hearing about it from everyone on the security staff, Lucius had to take action. 

His first problem was to get help from the computer department. He went there, and told them he needed Dan's offices to look empty, while someone was in there taking care of the alarm system. 

They happily agreed. 

His second problem was only two people had a key to Dan's office, and he was one of them. That would make him the obvious subject of an investigation. He had to be somewhere where he could be vouched for and who better to vouch for where he was, then Dan himself. 

Problem number three was where could he be sure to have Dan by his side for a long enough period of time to make sure this operation was a success? 

"Operation!" Accident, Doctor, HOSPITAL! What a perfect set up. Now all he had to do was put the pieces together and put everything into action. 

*********** 

"Doctor Finch please, Colonel Lucius Canyon calling." 

"Hello Lucius what's up?" 

"Hello Joe, I need you to put me in the hospital overnight. What type accident should I have?" 

"Who are you screwing with this time?" 

"The same as always; Dan." 

"What is it with you two?" 

"It's a hate love relationship. We hate to love each other." 

"You guys are insane." 

"We've known that for over 30 years Joe, ever since he got me kicked out of the Army. Now what kind of accident should I get into?" 

"The shoulder is always good, but the knee is better. What time should I expect you?" 

"What hours are you working in the next 3 to 6 weeks? I don't want to keep you at work any longer than necessary." 

"Like I have someplace to go, right?" 

"You will in December." 

"Only if my girls want to go, otherwise I'm staying here." 

"We agreed on that, but one way or the other, those two little girls are going to be with you, until they leave your nest." 

"I'm not even going to ask you how you are going to pull that off, but I wish you'd put that on tape for me to see." 

"You can read about it in the papers. It will be too late at night to take good pictures." 

"I start working 6 PM to 6 AM Thursday through Monday, for the next two month rotation, if that helps you any." 

"That will be perfect. I should arrive there about 6:45, three weeks from Thursday. Put it on your calendar, I don't want to surprise you when we walk in. Have a great day, and keep your chin up, it's not that long anymore." 

"Thanks Lucius, I'll see you in three weeks." 

"You still have not given me a picture of your wife." 

"That's because I burned them all. I'll have one for you soon." 

"I need it very soon Joe. I have to put my plan in action, so you can get your kids by Thanksgiving." 

"Thanksgiving, I thought you said Christmas." 

"You have to give the girls some time to think about it, don't you? Your wife will be going to jail, so they may want to stay here, rather than going into space. You are already a wealthy man, because you saved Margaret, we keep our word." 

"I'm wealthy; where is the money? 

"When was the last time you looked at your savings account?" 

"I don't look at my savings account, it's depressing. She took everything from it." 

"I don't think so. If I were you, I would take another look. Don't forget to declare it on your income tax; I don't want you to wind up in jail with your wife. If you decide to come with us, make sure your parents are listed on those accounts. I'll see you in three weeks, you better treat me nice." 

**************** 

Making sure everything would look normal when the day came; Lucius started a hand-to-hand combat school in the main building. It ran from 4PM to 7 PM seven days a week. This was not a voluntary item, this was obligatory training, which every agent had to attend at least twice a week, or at least that is what Dan was led to believe. 

Lookouts were posted everywhere. At the sight of Dan leaving his office, four teams would begin training. The most skilled members of the security force refereed each match, and yelled instructions to both combatants. When Dan was in the room with them, he was very impressed with Lucius' program. 

Everyone was prepared for that Thursday evening, when the signal was given that Dan was on his way. Lucius was on the far side of the room, supervising a match, when he saw Dan walk into the room. He waved and began jogging over to him. With the choreography of the Bolshoi ballet, two combatants fell towards Lucius right leg. He fell to the ground holding his knee, and screaming in pain. 

Paul was over him in a second, telling him not to move. He quickly puts drops of 'Liquid Tears', which he bought at a local drugstore, into Lucius's eyes. 

Dan got there and saw tears on Lucius's face. He had never seen this before, not even when Lucius had been shot in battle. 

"How are you Lucius?" 

"Danny get me to the hospital, my knee doesn't feel right." 

"Get him into a splint, and get the cars ready to take him." 

Lucius said, "Paul, you are ranking man; you have to stay here." 

"Sir, pick someone else, I want to go with you." 

"Sergeant, follow your orders." 

"Yes sir, but I don't like them one bit." 

"I'll see you in a few hours Paul." 

"Yes sir." 

As soon as the cars were on their way to the hospital, Paul raced up to General Morgan's office. He stuck the key in the door, unlocked it, and turned the handle to be sure it would open. Then he said, "READY," into his headset, and waited. 

From the computer room the supervisor said, "GO!" 

Paul walked carefully into the office, looking for anything the general may have left behind as a 'TELL.' He didn't see a string, a hair, or a piece of paper on the floor, or out of place. He marked the position of the wheels on the general's chair with small pieces of tape, and then moved it away. He moved under the desk, used a small electric screwdriver to take off the security alarm button. He dismantled it quickly; then spread a tiny amount of a non-conductive paste over both sides of the four contact points, rendering them useless. He wiped off the excess, put the alarm button back together, and secured it to the sidewall of the desk. He checked the floor to make sure there was no evidence he had been there, and backed out slowly. He moved to the general's chair to the tape marks, removed the tape, and took one more look around. 

He saw it as he moved to the left of the general's desk. The son of a bitch doesn't trust his own people. He waved into the security camera. 

"We have a problem; get up here." 

The supervisor was there in a minute. 

"What's wrong Paul?" 

Paul pointed to the little red light behind Margaret's ashes. 

"That sneaky son of a bitch." 

"Do you think there may be more?" 

"There may be, but there is one good way to kill most of them, with one shot." He took out his cell phone and called his office. "Sylvia, we have a problem. Bring up the Electronic Magnetic Amplifiers; we are going hunting." 

*********************** 

They carried Lucius into the emergency room, and all he was doing was complaining. 

"Leave me alone, I can walk." 

Doctor Finch walked out from behind a curtain and laughed. 

"Did you finally get even with him General?" 

"Doc, I wish I could say it was me, but it wasn't. It was a training accident." 

"In other words, you threw him off the roof of the building without a parachute." 

"Honest Doctor, two men were practicing hand-to-hand combat, and they fell on his leg. Do you need help cutting it off?" 

"He is so small we can use a penknife." 

"Are you two finished yet? I'll go home now and take an aspirin." 

"Before you go Colonel, can I see you walk?" 

"As long as you let me go home, I'll dance for you." 

Lucius took one-step forward, and fell on his face. 

Doctor Finch laughed. "How was the landing Colonel, because the fall was flawless." 

"When I get to you Doctor, I'm going to bite your shoes." 

"Tim get me a gurney, Gail strip him, and let me look at that knee." 

"Gentlemen, you know the drill. Sit down; this is going to take some time." 

They put Lucius into an examining room, closed the curtain, took off his clothes, and put him into a gown. They filled out all the perfunctory forms, until Doctor Finch walked in. 

"Gail, we are going to be part of a performance that is being put on for the benefit of General Morgan. Help me along here if you would please." 

"No problem Doctor, I failed acting in high school." 

"In that case you will do wonderfully here." 

"Holy cow Lucius, look at the size of that thing." 

"I don't think it's that big." 

"Gail what do you think?" 

"I've seen a few bigger, but not many. I think that thing is huge." 

"Gail, you're looking at the wrong thing. I'm talking about this thing." 

"That thing is ugly. I'd rather look at the other thing." 

"Keep your mind on your work young lady." 

"I'd rather she keep thinking about what I'm thinking about doc." 

"If she was 12 inches away from you Lucius, you couldn't get to her." 

"He could with that thing Doctor, but not the other thing." 

"If you keep talking like that young woman, you are going to lose your raise." 

"He is already giving me a raise Doctor, a really big raise." 

"Lucius get your hand out from under her uniform." 

"I'm just trying to keep my mind off the pain." 

"Take him to x-ray, and stay out of the room, unless there is someone else with you." 

"That's not fair Doctor. You don't mind when we're in that room alone." 

"That's different, I'm only examining you." 

"Three times a night." 

"I'm doing a study." 

"I don't mind the first two parts of the study. It's the third one that hurts." 

"Why didn't you say so? I'll change your position. Instead of doing it to you while you're on your knees, I'll put you on your back with your knees over my shoulders. When I insert my tester into your colon it might not hurt so much." 

"That is extremely kind of you Doctor. I'd like to try it that way with Mister Canyon." 

"I wouldn't mind filming your posterior for posterity." 

Lucius said, "It's possible that you two are the worst actors I've ever met. A great medical team possibly, but you can't act." 

"Would you like to hear us sing?" 

"I'll pass, if you don't mind." 

"Off to x-ray you go." 

"Have fun with him Gail." 

As he entered the waiting area, Dan jumped on Doctor Finch. 

"What the hell was going on in their Doctor?" 

"What do you mean General?" 

"It sounded like you were having a smoker in there." 

"You must be mistaken. I was in there with Lucius alone most of the time, and that knee is in bad shape. If the scans show what I believe they are going to show, he's got three meniscus tears and possibly a year or more of physical therapy ahead of him. What the hell goes on over there? You sure believe in keeping your people in top shape, but it sure is taking a toll on them. How old is Lucius now, 70, or 71. I didn't count all the bullet wounds, but there has to be eight or nine of those. The jagged marks on his legs must to come from barbed wire, shrapnel, hand grenades, or mines. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



The amazing thing is not only is he alive, but I've never seen a man his age in such perfect physical and mental shape. I would love to clone his DNA. However, it's against the law, not that I wouldn't mind breaking it in his case." 

"Listen to me Doctor, if you clone him, I will kill you. I can barely put up with one of him. If you bring any more of him into this world, I will find you, and put you in a meat grinder until you come out looking like pink slime." 

"I thought you and Lucius were friends?" 

"We are, sort of, but it took Margaret to keep us in balance." 

"What would Margaret do; put you both in timeout?" 

"No, she would yell at us, and tell us to stop it this instant. She would read us the riot act. She was our friend, and we would do anything for her. In his own way, Lucius loved her as much as I did." 

"General, in that case, you have to learn how to grow up." 

"You don't know how many times I've heard that from Margaret and Lucius. If we had the chance, Margaret would have shown me how. Go take care of my friend; I'll be waiting here." 

"Way to go Admiral." 

"Don't start with me Doctor; I have a very short fuse." 

************ 

If there is one thing our new electronic devices don't like, its powerful magnets. When Sylvia arrived in Dan's office, she brought two high-powered, variable frequency electronic magnet wands with her. 

Michael and Sylvia went through the two offices expertly. If there was a recording device, of any nature, it was wiped clean when one of these wands came within 12 inches of it. They did both offices in less than 10 minutes, including the air conditioning ducts. Dan had three video cameras hidden in his office, and all were pointing at his desk. 

Paul locked the door, when the trio was finished. 

Michael said he had to get downstairs and make sure they had 20 minutes of constant coverage of Dan's office that looked absolutely perfect. If those minutes weren't perfect, Dan would blow the roof off the building. Then he would start shooting people, starting with the Colonel." 

*************** 

Doctor Finch walked into the waiting room holding three x-rays. 

"That man is absolutely amazing. Look at these general; look at these x-rays. There is nothing torn or damaged; he has a sprained knee. From what you told me, he should be being operated on in the morning, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with him. I don't care what you say; the military needs more people like him. I am going to clone him. He is better than that old series, "The Six Million Dollar Man." 

He's in his room hobbling after our nurse. I have $10 on him. I'm keeping him here overnight to let the swelling go down. I'll put him in a knee brace in the morning, if he needs it, and then I'll send him home. If you want to see him, go ahead. Just knock on the door first, if it's closed. He may be screwing the nurse." 

"What kind of hospital are you running here Doctor?" 

"A happier one, since your boss, Mister Zabo, bought it. Everyone is much friendlier at work." 

"It certainly sounds that way Doctor. We will check on Lucius before we leave." 

************** 

The nurse was adjusting the pillows behind Lucius's head, and one of her breasts was inches from his wide-open mouth. He moved it into perfect position to bite it, when Dan yelled, "Don't you dare touch her." 

The nurse swiftly moved away from Lucius. 

"Are you at it again with Mister Canyon? I'm going to have welts all over my behind, and elsewhere, because of you." 

"Can I help it if you're so beautiful?" 

"Colonel, keep your hands to yourself." 

"That wasn't my hand General. You know what it's like being cooped up in hospital." 

"They just got you into bed Lucius, that doesn't qualify as being cooped up." 

"It does for me sir." 

"Do I have to leave two guards here overnight to protect the nurse?" 

Jason and Harry said, "Yes sir, you do." 

"I take it you two are not married." 

"One of us could be by morning sir." 

"Get out of here; you are as bad as he is." 

"Can we get anything for you, before we leave Lucius?" 

"No, but would you take my wallet my keys with you. I don't like leaving those things lying around." 

"Where are you hiding them, Lucius?" 

"They are in my shoes, with my socks." 

"That's the first place crooks look, you idiot." 

"How am I supposed to know? I try to stay out of hospitals, as much as possible." 

"Alright, I'll see you in the morning." 

"Thanks Danny, good night." 

**************** 

118. Thin Air 

Richard asked, "Dad have you put any thought into what we are going to do if we find a planet that is livable, but has an oxygen ratio that is too low." 

It was one of those moments, where I wanted to kick myself. "Richard did I tell you I love you today?" 

"It doesn't matter if you tell me out loud dad, I know you do. You show me how much you love me by the way you treat me, and the way you look at me." 

"I still should say it more often my son. When I was very sick, that is one of the things I thought about, but did not have the strength to write down. I did not remember it, as I was getting better. Thank you for reminding me. Did you have anything in mind for that problem?" 

"There are two obvious answers dad; we could either wear light spacesuits, depending on other atmospheric conditions, or we can wear oxygen bottles on our backs, as scuba divers do. We will have to wear facemasks, again depending on the atmospheric conditions outside. We could use a 3-D printer to make masks of various designs, made to our specific needs at the time." 

"Come over here mister nine-year-old genius, I'm going to spank you." 

"Why, what did I do wrong now?" 

"Do you want to guess what we forgot to order for the spacecraft?" 

"Let me guess, would it be a 3-D printer?" 

"No it would be three 3-D printers, with a bunch of spare parts, and supplies." 

"Why three dad; why not two or four?" 

"You always want one printer near the main bridge, just in case something needs to be repaired quickly. You need a second printer near Engineering, for the same reason. You want the third printer by the maintenance area, as a ready replacement, if one of the others breaks down. You bring that machine to replace the broken one. You bring the broken one to maintenance, to be repaired immediately. The broken machine becomes a priority item. It must be repaired with all due haste. Almost everything else will move back one spot because of it." 

"I love talking to you dad, and that's one of the reasons why. I never get a yes or no answer and have it end there. I always get an explanation to go along with it. I understand the reason why something has to be the way it is. Gordon gives me answers the same way, and he tells me it's because of you." 

"Thank you Richard, that means a lot to me. Teaching Gordon was easy, because he was an excellent student. Knowing he is teaching you the same way means I got through to him. Now he is getting through to you the same way. You must be an excellent student." 

"I hope so dad. I'm going to go work on that oxygen problem to see what else I can come up with." 

"Don't get too bogged down with it Richard, because there are too many variables to can go with it. All that would have to happen is there is too much radiation, or ultraviolet light, and you would have to adjust everything." 

"Okay dad, I'll give it two hours. If something doesn't happen by then, I'll give up on it." 

"That's a good boy Richard, and it's an excellent compromise." 

"Just one more question dad; when I'm making my computations do I make it for 70 people." 

"You always plan for more than what you have. 10 percent more is always the minimum." 

"Thank you dad, I'm going back to work. I'm going to stop bothering you now, so you can get back to work." 

"You can bother me anytime you want with questions like that Richard. If we left without those supplies I would have kicked myself." 

**************** 

Delicious answered the telephone, while watching Newton and Teddy fooling around on the floor. 

"One moment please." 

"Newt, ask your sister who's on the phone." 

"Okay mom." 

"Teddy, mommy wants to know who's on the phone." 

"Mom, Teddy said it's a man that's going to make you very happy." 

"Hello." 

"Hello Mrs. Thyme, this is Wes Purcell from Babcock and Wilcox, how are you today?" 

"Hello Mister Purcell, my daughter just told me you are going to make me very happy. That can only mean that the engine and casing is finished. Am I correct?" 

"How old is your daughter again?" 

"She's 10 months old." 

"She's 10 months old and she's talking in sentences already?" 

"Do you remember my son, Newton, Mister Purcell?" 

"How could I ever forget him Mrs. Thyme?" 

"Well Teddy is extremely talented, but in a different way." 

"Oh, okay." 

"Tell me about the engine?" 

"It is a thing of beauty. We are ready to ship it to you, anytime you want it. It's all sealed up, and really to float to Houston. We will arrange for the special railroad car to be there to take it to the intersection of the highway just north of you. The highway will be closed, between the railroad crossing and your facility because of the oversized flatbed truck that will be carrying the engine. We will arrange for the police escort, and the escort trucks to be there to bracket the flatbed carrying the engine." 

"Did you make the changes to the chamber, from fission to fusion?" 

"Yes I did. I wish I was going with you so I could see it work." 

"Unfortunately Mister Purcell, you don't qualify. You are over 40 years old, and you are married." 

"You are married, and you are going." 

"My husband is a scientist, and I designed two of the three engines. We are an exception to the rule." 

"I built your engine. I wouldn't mind leaving my wife, my four kids, my mortgage, my car payments, and my bills behind." 

"I only have two children Mister Purcell, and I'm seeing a psychiatrist because of them. Send me my engine, and I hope it will take my mind off them. Hold on one second Mister Purcell my son needs me." 

"Yes Newton, what do you need?" 

"It's not me mommy, it's Teddy. She said if you're not nice to us, you will not know what wire to put into what socket when your engine comes." 

"Mister Purcell, please send me my engine before there's a hurricane. I have a little tornado in my home, and we are going to have a discussion." 

"It will be on its way in two days Mrs. Thyme. All the measurements checked out within millimeters of your specifications. Please don't put it in backwards." 

"Thank you Mister Purcell, between you and my children, I'm going to start playing with Tinker Toys. Goodbye." 

"Come with me Newton; we're going have a talk with Teddy; and if my mother is listening, she is going to get an ear full also." 

***************** 

I was in William's office telling him now was the time to send out the emails to the scientists I felt best fit the profile for our expedition, and would mix well with our other passengers. None of them was over 40 years old, or married, but there were only 30 slots available for them. If it was at all possible, I wanted to pick slightly more females than males, depending on their qualifications. We didn't have to worry about government protocols, because we were a private endeavor. 

It was also time for us to pick out the specialists for our crew. Each person was of vital importance to the success of our mission. We would publish a list to the people who worked for us over the past seven years. If they met our qualifications, and wanted to take the trip of a lifetime, they were to respond using only their employee identification number. Using this method, we hoped to keep unwanted solicitations down to a minimum. 

Big Blue began categorizing our former employees by sex, age, marital status, work record, and supervisory comments. I never realized how many female employees we had working on the spacecraft, and not just as logistical support, or clerical workers. I went to my office and used the computer to find out exactly how many females we had working on the spacecraft. Much to my surprise, it was 38 percent. 

When you think of construction work, you always think of big burly man, with huge arms, using large hammers to pound four-inch nails to connect 2 x 4's into shape. It took me a while to realize I designed this craft, without the use of metal. Otherwise, it would have defeated the purpose of Delicious Magnetic Direct Drive Engines. 

I shook my head; I have been away from work too long. I had to get my brain back into gear. I had to get back to my science, my first love. I went to my workstation, read the last chapter of my notes, and started working. I did not move for the rest of the day, until I saw a needle in front of my eyes. 

Hannah said, "It's your choice Doctor Luck; the easy way for you, or the easy way for me. Which way shall it be?" 

"Can I complete writing down my notes and we can leave?" 

"How long are we talking about Doctor?" 

"It will take one or two minutes, not any longer than that." 

"Go ahead Doctor, but at the two minute mark the needle goes into your neck." 

"I agree Hannah." 

I wrote down everything I needed to remember as I closed in on the ending of my workday, and where my mind was heading when I stopped. I closed the book put it in my drawer and locked it. I pushed my chair back turned and began to stand up. I fell down into my seat, because my legs had fallen to sleep. 

"What's the matter Doctor?" 

"My legs are numb." 

"How long have you been sitting there?" 

"I started working at about 10 o'clock this morning, and I didn't stop." 

"That's the best way to get a blood clot in your legs Doctor. You will die quickly, as the blood starts to flow and apiece of that clot breaks off and heads towards your lungs and heart. It will find a place in your veins where it's too narrow to pass through, and a blockage will occur. You will feel a pain in your back, fall to the ground, and 30 seconds later, you are dead. It happens to people who fly long distances, and don't get up to move around the cabin. You must get up at least once every hour, and walk around to get the blood circulating past your knees." 

"I knew that Hannah, I just didn't think about it, while I was working. Thank you for reminding me. Thank you; I never say that enough to any of you." 

"Come on Doctor, grab my shoulders, we have to get you walking." 

In less than a minute, with Hannah's help, my legs were working again. She was a wealth of knowledge, but I still didn't like that eight-inch pin she carried around in her hair. 

I worked very hard for the rest of the week, but I remembered to get up and walk around every so often. I could see one of my three wardens, sitting in a corner nearby, reading, cross-stitching, doing needlepoint, or knitting. Every time I would stand up, to walk around, they would raise their heads, and watch me. They would nod their heads and keep me in their sites, until I returned to my seat. Once I was secure again, they would return to their previous occupation, until I got up again. 

Truly, this was unnerving. It was as if we were connected at some level, and I could not escape their conscience thoughts. As I thought about it, I decided I really didn't want this to change, because their behavior was for the benefit of my health. 

************ 

Delicious approached me Friday and told me the nuclear engine was due to arrive Tuesday afternoon. She asked me if we could take 'The Best Luck' out of its' home in the hangar, and put it in the center of our open field, so she and Gordon, and their team could move the engine, using our heavy equipment, and put it on its skid's. They could adjust its position, slide it into the rails, and lock it down. This would allow them to make all the proper electrical connections, while the Fusion Engine was outside the nuclear chamber. It would make it easier for them to do, because they would have more room to do it. It also meant the only thing left to do, when the engine was placed inside the spacecraft, where the flexible cooling connections and that would make the installers very happy. 

Gordon could do all his electrical testing from the control room. If everything checked out, he could simply move a switch and bring the engine into the spacecraft. If it didn't, it would be easier to find, because the engine was still outside the spacecraft, and all the scientists and technicians would be there to look for the fault. 

Once all the lights were green on Gordon's board, the engine would be moved inside the spacecraft, secured by the internal locking collars, and blocked into place. The interior of the nuclear compartment would be sealed, from the outside of the spacecraft, using the same Silicon Carbide/Beryllium Oxide composite ceramic of the sarcophagus, and the seams sealed using one of Dycke Schneider's magical heat-treated chemicals that would bond it permanently to the other radiation resistant compounds used to seal off the nuclear compartment. 

Once the cooling system attachments were completed, and the doors on the interior portion of the nuclear engine were sealed, Gordon wood flood the compartment to 350 psi of helium to verify there were no radiation leaks into the spacecraft. 

After 10 minutes at that pressure, if no alarms went off, no tags showed signs of radiation contamination, and the gauges showed no helium leakage, the helium would be returned to its tanks, and he would start the engine, using the appropriate protocols. All exterior electrical connections would be removed as the new nuclear fusion engine began to take over the electrical load. 

When the engine was needed for use in space, it would be lowered, using an escalator system, and deployed through a hatch designed for this purpose, with its blocking and locking system attached, to keep it stable, while it is running at full power. The cooling system would be shut off during this period, and the engine would be returned to the spacecraft, after it was cooled by the minus 256 degree or lower temperatures of space, and then returned to normal operating procedures, using pressurized water. 

The final four pieces of the exterior of 'The Best Luck' would be sealed into place, and unless you knew exactly where to look, you would never know where the entrances to our spacecraft were. 

(As she continued to talk, my mind wandered. The hardest thing left to do on the exterior of our craft was the painting of the names on it: UNITED STATED and THE BEST LUCK. I was also going to have the names of our investors painted on it, but it was going to be a Christmas present for them. Everything else going on the outside of this spacecraft was stickers. They were big, but they were still stickers. It dawned on me that we had not set up how or where we were going to put those stickers on the ship. We needed a design artist to do that.) 

It took my daughter almost 8 minutes to go through this entire explanation, and I absorbed everything she said to me with a great deal of admiration for what she had accomplished. I must have had the largest smile on my face when she finished, because she said, "It's okay if we move it then right?" 

"NO!" 

She nearly jumped out of her skin. "No, what do you mean NO?" 

"The opposite of yes, or you may not do it." 

"Why?" 

"It's supposed to rain Monday. I don't want the inside of our spaceship to get wet." 

"Wouldn't it be better to know...? She stopped in midsentence, looked at me, and shook her head. 

"Dad, you are impossible." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



"Good, that means I'm getting back to normal. Let me call William, and I'll tell him we are taking the spacecraft out for a walk. He can call the press. They can come here to take a look at it, after the engine is in. Please don't break it." 

"If I drop it, I'll make sure there are two children underneath it." 

"If my sister heard you say that, she would strike you with a lightning bolt." 

"Teddy threatened me today. She and I had a little talk. I said to her, "You are willing to kill 70 people, including yourself, because you are not happy with the way I talk about you. If you want me to die, let's do it in a car accident. There is only one problem; you would be in the child seat behind me. Are you absolutely sure, you would survive? Be nice young lady, I have a temper too." 

"She hasn't said anything unkind about me since." 

************** 

When William made the announcement that the spacecraft was being moved outside Monday afternoon, every one was giddy. Finally, they would be able to see the real size and scope of what they had been working on for nearly 4 years. Emails were sent out to all former employees to advise them of the event and to tell them that this was what everyone had been waiting for, "This was going to be the short test flight." 

William was concerned. "Are you sure we are ready for this Even?" 

"Absolutely, we are 10 million pounds underweight at this point. If she won't fly now, we have a problem. It's better to know that now than in December." 

"Why are we that far underweight?" 

"We haven't put the 6 million pounds of water into the exterior shell yet. The other 4 million pounds is spread out among assorted group of items, but trust me it's there." 

"I trust you Even; if I didn't, I wouldn't be in this project." 

******** 

Monday morning the floor of the hangar shined like the floor of the new car showroom. No one was taking a chance that one of the six Sledhandlers would puncture a tire and unbalance the spacecraft. 

The spacecraft could move on its own bearings, but no one wanted to take a chance on having to change those huge things here on Earth, because of some avoidable mishap. 

Each bearing was the size of a medium size truck tire, and they weighed 2300 pounds each. There were 24 of them at the end of each of the six struts that held up the spacecraft. The machinists were warned; during the year they went to school, to put them in correctly the first time. You do not want to have to change them here on Earth because one of you screwed up. It will be the worst two weeks of labor you will ever work in your entire lives." 

************ 

No one walked on the outside perimeter of the spacecraft as it finally began to move; they all walked underneath it. They marveled at its immense size, because now it was not just something they were working on a small part of, now this was their spacecraft, and the world was ready to see it. 

It was 25 times larger than the space shuttle. It was a huge 'Black Beach Ball, with little glass eyes all around it. Then there were the ears, and they folded out and in perfectly. Gray did a perfect job on these. When the electronic arrays were in place, and folded close to the spacecraft as possible, the covering would help them stay intact, as we passed through the dense atmosphere of planet Earth, and into the calm of outer space. Once there, the spaceship could tumble like a bowling ball and it wouldn't matter. 

The sledhandlers coaxed the huge machine towards the steel reinforced concrete pads that were made for it by Colonel Jack Daniels and his crew. Each pad was 24 feet long by 24 feet wide by 10 feet deep, with a concrete strength of 18,000 psi. 

As each huge machine reached the center of its mark, the driver flipped on his lights leaving the other drivers to adjust their positions accordingly. From lift off to touchdown, it took 367 minutes to move the huge spacecraft 1973 feet. (329 ft. per hr./ 6 hrs. 7 min.) 

After two hours into this agony, Janice grabbed my hand, felt my pulse, and threw the blood pressure cuff around my arm. 

As she looked at the numbers I begged her, "Please don't tell me its bedtime." 

"Doc, if you don't calm down, I'm going to have to put you out. You are over all your limits. I know how stressful this is for you, but I don't want you to have a heart attack. Close your eyes and try to relax. I'll take your numbers again in five minutes. If they are this bad, I'm not going to have a choice, I'm going to have to put you to sleep." 

"Let's go inside the hangar Janice. I'll find a chair and sit in the shade." 

"Good boy Doctor, I'm proud of you." 

"I wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for my terrible trio." 

"Is that what you're calling us now, "The Terrible Trio?" 

"You may not get a recording contract, but on Christmas day, when this ship leaves the ground, you are going to get a Christmas present you will remember forever." 

Gordon walked over to me, grinning from ear to ear. 

"Well, what do you think dad?" 

"It's a little smaller than I thought it would be." 

"Smaller, it's huge dad. It blocks out the sun." 

"It was just a test. I wanted to know how you felt about it. Have you made a decision in reference to Holden?" 

"Yes, dad, I have. I've decided to stay here with him." 

"You see, I told you with the passage of time you could make a decision that would suit you. Your mother will be so pleased." 

"Why will mom be pleased?" 

"She will only have one child to tend to, not three." 

"You're full of crap dad. Mom would miss me." 

"So I guess you don't think I would miss you?" 

"This is so freaking hard dad." 

"What are you finding so difficult Gordon?" 

"If I give my patent to Holden, it means I've lied to other people, and you know I try never to lie. What would happen if Holden holds the world hostage because of that patent? I wanted it to be used for good, not for some frivolous reason." 

"What do you consider a frivolous reason?" 

"Buying a 200 foot yacht, so you can waterski behind it." 

"What have you seen Holden doing that would make you think he would do that kind of thing? What has he done in this house over the last few months that would give you that idea?" 

"I love Holden dad, but he is still a baby. Who knows where he's going to go when he grows up?" 

"Holden already knows where he's going, and he knows it specifically. I heard him talking with Richard, and he has plans that would astound you. He is more advanced than you were at his age. I'm not worried about him, and where he is going, and neither should you." 

"Thank you dad, thank you very much for your help." 

"Who me, I didn't say a thing." 

**************** 

"Hello dad, Gordon said you wanted to see me." 

"Yes, but normally on an occasion like this, I get to see your husband and my grandchildren. Might I ask where they are?" 

"My husband is inside the spacecraft playing. Your grandchildren are playing with your son and future daughter. Is that all right, or would you like me to go get them?" 

"Grab a chair; we have to talk for a minute." 

"Okay dad, I'm all ears." 

"We both know that's a lie, but I shall continue. You made a promise to yourself that I would like you to break before we leave in December. You said you were going to give your patent for the Magnetic Drive Engines to the University of Chicago, because they were so close to getting it that you felt like you stole their work. 

I for one know you did not steal their work, and so does William Zabo. He went up there well after your engines were common knowledge, and they still had not figured it out. He had to show them the way to do it, and the professor kicked himself in the ass when he realized what he did wrong. They were still going in the opposite direction. William asked the professor what they were finding out going that way. He said they had found many exciting possibilities going in that direction, but nothing specific had come out of it yet. 

I would like you, if you can see your way clear, to give your patent for the Magnetic Drive Engines to your brother Holden. He has very exciting and very specific plans for his future. If you were to stay here, you would enjoy going along for the ride with him. At his age, he is already further advanced than Gordon was. I know what Holden's plans are, because I overheard him talking with Richard about them. He doesn't know that I know, so please keep my secret. 

Again, this is only a request. It is not a demand. This is completely and totally up to you. Whatever you decide, there will be no repercussions either way. It's just something I am asking you to think about." 

"Now I'm going to find my grandchildren. Come on Delicious let's go I want to see both before it starts to rain." 

"Not so fast Doctor Luck, give me your arm." 

"I'm fine Janice, trust me." 

"I'd rather trust my meter." 

"You can take him Mrs. Thyme. He is just under his limit. Try to keep him calm, I won't be far behind him." 

"He has always been a pain in the ass. Why don't you give me the syringe, and the next time he pisses me off, that's where I'll stick him." 

"I would love to do that, but one woman got so pissed off with her husband she took the syringe and injected him in his eye. He fell asleep, but he lost the eye. The law says we can't give out syringes anymore." 

"Can I go see my grandchildren before it rains?" 

"Yes you may, but it's not supposed to rain today." 

We found my grandchildren playing with Zoie and Gordon. Zoie had Teddy by her fingers as the little wonder child was trying to walk. Newton and Gordon were throwing a frisbee to each other, and both of them were very good at it. Apparently, it had a lot to do with physics, and both of them were very good at physics. 

After 15 minutes of playing with both my grandchildren, I announced that I was going into our spacecraft and hoped they would all join me, because it was going to rain. 

"Dad, there's not a cloud in the sky, it is not going to rain today." 

"Okay, but I feel it in my bones. It is going to rain here today, and soon." 

"Fine, we will go into the spaceship with you. Maybe I'll even find my husband in there." 

When they reached the command level on the third floor, we found everyone who would be at those positions tomorrow, studying each display as if their lives depended on it. On the far left side sat Grayson Thyme studying his display, even though none of his instrumentation was on the ears yet. 

We walked up behind him, and I asked, "Well Doctor, how do we look?" 

"Confused, very confused; I'm not getting any readings at all." 

"Could it be because your instruments are still in their boxes, in the warehouse?" 

"That could definitely be the case Doctor Luck. I'll look into it when we get back to work Thursday. We will be busy all day tomorrow, and doing a debriefing on Wednesday. Besides that, you are not going to get any more work done today, because it's going to rain." 

Delicious said, "Gray it is not going to rain today. It's beautiful outside." 

No sooner had she finished her sentence, then there were two large claps of thunder in a row. 

She turned and looked at me. "It's just thunder dad. It doesn't mean it's going to rain." 

"Gray when it starts raining, I want you to scatter people all over the ship to verify there is no water intrusion. If there is, have them mark it, and move on. We will fix it another day." 

"Okay dad, we will check everything from top to bottom." 

Delicious was turning red. "You two brainiacs are out of your mind it is not going to rain today. I would bet my second born child on it." 

Jennifer laughed at her. "You just want to get rid of Teddy. If you were positive it's not going to rain you would've bet Newton." 

"I take that back, I'll bet Gray instead." 

"Hey, what did I do?" 

"You sided with my father, and said it was going to rain, when you know it's not going to rain today." 

"It is going to rain today, I can feel it in my bones." 

"You men, and your bones. I'm leaving, come with me Newton." 

"I think we better go with her, otherwise she's going to drown." 

Zoie said, "I guess Delicious didn't see those Cumulonimbus clouds growing to the southwest of us today. If the upper level winds are right, we are going to get wet." 

"I didn't know I was going to marry a meteorologist. Tell me, how much do you know about meteors?" 

As my son recovered from the pain inflicted by his fiancées elbow attack, I said to him, "Gordon when are you going to learn to think first, and talk second." 

"Soon dad, Zoie is getting very strong, and as soon as she hits me, I remember your advice. It's a little late getting to my head, but I remember. Soon I will remember it before I get hit, and get out of the way." 

"There is an even better way than that Gordon. Censor what you're going to say, into something you won't get hit for saying." 

"It's time for us to leave, it's going to rain very soon." 

"Dammit dad, for the last time, it is not going to rain today." 

"Watch this Gordon, and learn." 

"Delicious, you're absolutely right. It's not going to rain today."" 

************** 

We ran the last 20 feet into the hangar, because it wasn't raining. It started as hail the size of quarters, and that disturbed me as I watched it build up on the top of my spacecraft. 

Then came the punishing rains, out of the southwest, as Zoie had predicted. The winds built up to at least 70 miles an hour, and probably more. Our spacecraft sat there without moving, just as I knew it would. There were no surfaces for the wind to grab onto, so it stood there bravely, and took everything the storms had in them. The winds howled, and the rain pounded down for over an hour before the sun reappeared. 

I waited impatiently for my phone to ring, to get the results of Gray's inspection. When it did, my hand shook so bad Jennifer had to hold it still for me to answer it. 

The excited voice on the other side of the phone yelled, "Dad, she is as dry as a bone. She is wonderful." 

"What did you expect Gray, you knew there was no shoddy workmanship put into that boat of ours." 

"How can you not be excited over what she just went through dad?" 

Jennifer pulled the phone away from me and answered him. "Don't let him fool you Gray. He was so nervous I had to hold the phone for him, because his hands were shaking so badly." 

"Thanks mom, I'm only a scientist, he is the engineer. I'll beat him up when I see him." 

"No you won't, because I have a better idea." 

"Should I ask you what is?" 

"Just listen Gray, and you will understand." 

"Janice, it's bedtime." 

I started to say, "Please, I don't want.." 

I felt the needle pierce the skin of my neck and watched as Jennifer finished her phone call. She smiled at me, and I saw her lips say the words 'Good Night Darling', as my eyes closed. This was not funny. I did not like this one little bit, but how could you argue with people who saved your life, and were helping you get stronger every day. I had not progressed as fast as the Doctor's initially thought I would. 

We had a fierce argument over the fact they did not want me to continue working because of it. The result was I kept my 'Terrible Trio' with me until my departure date. I even asked Tammy and Janice if they wanted to come along on the adventure of a lifetime. Janice immediately said, "No Way." 

However, Tammy said, "She would think about it." 

When she mentioned it to her parents, they told her in no uncertain terms that they would throw her in a mental institution, before they allowed her to go into space. 

Therefore, Tammy turned us down also. 

Unfortunately, Hannah did not fit into the profile, and I told her that's why she couldn't come along. She understood. 

***************** 

119. First Flight 

On Tuesday morning, a little after 4 AM, in a well lit, but isolated area of the Houston docks, a tugboat pulling a huge barge, tied up at a pier. The captain and his crew did not go near their cargo. Instead, a crane lifted the lead sealed box over the top of a specially designed nuclear transport train that was sitting on a siding, and lowered it inside. The cables detached automatically, and the doors on the top of the train were lowered and sealed. A neutral gas was pumped under pressure to the inside of the train, to check for any radiation leakage. There was none, and the gas was extracted. 

Due to US regulations, the train was restricted to a speed of not more than 20 miles per hour, because of its cargo. The track it was taking was cleared between Houston and Temple. The 165-mile trip was going to take just under nine hours. The Southern Pacific Railroad was not going to have a nuclear accident on its hands today. 

At 5:10 AM, under heavy security, the nuclear train began leaving the yard. This was a very dangerous part of the trip, because there were many times when it had to change tracks, and go through sidings to pass other trains that blocked the main line. It took nearly 45 minutes to clear the congestion, and get on the main line that would take it to Temple. 

Once they were underway, the conductor, and the engineer never took their eyes off the track ahead. The trains speed was always under the posted speed limit, and the tracks had been checked the evening before. However, all that was needed to cause a catastrophe was for one vehicle to try to cross the tracks at the last moment, and everyone, within 50 miles, would lose. 

No one wanted to open the nuclear containment car, near a residential area, to see if its contents had been breached, because the results would be horrific. It would be catastrophic, if there was a breach, and the train continued traveling to Temple. 

The engineer sounded the trains' horn one mile prior to any intersection or dirt road crossing. He continued to sound it, until he passed that point. 

This was against company policy and Federal Noise Regulations. However, when you are carrying nuclear material, all those restrictions get thrown out the window, and safety becomes the 'Imperative.' 

**************** 

The train arrived, without incident, 9 ½ hours later. The flatbed truck, and the huge crane were in position to relieve it of its contents. The top of the nuclear transport car opened, and two men moved into position to guide the hooks on the end of the cables, into the eyebolts on top of the lead box. 

The Crane took up the slack, the two men gave the thumbs up sign and moved out of the way. 

The Crane operator lifted the box out of the train car and onto the flatbed truck without a problem. He gave the cables some slack, the hooks released. He pulled them up and out of the way. As everyone paid attention to the flatbed and secured the engine to it, the crane operator, and his two assistants safed the boom, and the cables, and drove to the NEST. 

Once Delicious was happy that the engine was safely attached to the flatbed, she climbed into the police car, and told the sergeant that they could leave anytime he wanted. 

Sergeant Bertolli lined up his car, with the centerline of the two-lane highway, got on his radio, and said, "Let's light them up boys." 

Delicious could hear every Texas Ranger start their engines, with a roar. 

Not to be left out, the truck driver started his huge diesel engine, with a louder roar. 

Sergeant Bertolli turned on his flashing lights, and proceeded down the highway at a brisk 25 miles per hour. The road was straight as an arrow, with very few bumps worth worrying about. 

Sentry trucks were a quarter mile ahead of us on both sides of the road, with their yellow flashing lights blinking away. This was the safest stretch of road in the State of Texas at this moment, and no one was going to change it 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



As they approached our compound, the sentry trucks joined the blockade that closed the highway. Sergeant Bertolli made a wide turn into the road that would take the flatbed to the NEST and slowed down to watch it make the turn behind us. 

Once that was accomplished, and we could look straight ahead, Sergeant Bertolli gasped. 

"Is that it?" 

Delicious laughed. "Tiny isn't it?" 

"Tiny my ass, how the hell are you going to get that thing off the ground tomorrow?" 

"Why don't you stop by tomorrow, and find out for yourself?" 

"The United States government can't get something on 1/10th that size off the ground, how are you going to do it?" 

"Sergeant, The Good Luck is 25 times the size of the Space Shuttle System. The space shuttle system is designed for low Earth orbit. The Good Luck will be looking for Earth 2. It's designed to fly like the Starship Enterprise, and if our estimates are correct, we may even reach the same speeds. We have three revolutionary engines, one of them is behind us now. Two others already installed and ready to go. Tomorrow, we will take it for a short test flight. We may only go up 100 feet, and hover to test the control systems. Can you imagine the power needed to take something that size up 100 feet and controlling it at that altitude for a few minutes, before bringing it down for a soft landing?" 

"No Mrs. Thyme, but I would pay the price of admission to see that." 

"Unless you have very poor eyesight, you could be 10 miles away and see it. If you would let me off here and continue straight ahead, I will wait for the engine to arrive with my brothers. It's been a pleasure Sergeant." 

***************** 

The flatbed truck was guided to the exact position it was needed, and stopped. Everyone who was going to open, or go near the open casing the engine was in, was wearing radiation safety suits, which covered every part of the body from head to toe. Special gloves were worn, and taped around the wrist to the suit itself to prevent them from falling off. The headgear included a breathing filter, and an oxygen canister on the person's back. 

Using tools specifically designed to open these nuclear containers, two men worked on both sides, at the same time, removing the top bolts. When they were finished, the Crane operator moved the cables into position, and the men placed the hooks into the collapsible eyebolts, and signaled the crane operator to lift it up and move it to the back of the flatbed. 

After releasing two spring-loaded handles on the inside of the nuclear container, the front door eased down helped by the use of heavy springs. For the first time, Gordon, and Delicious were able to see the Fusion Engine. It was still in its wooden crate, and covered with plastic, but they could actually see the unit itself, and they were in awe of it. 

"Okay people, you've seen it, we have work to do. Get out of the way please." 

The Crane operator was much more careful this time. The only thing separating the engine from the floor was a few pieces of wood, and dropping the engine at this point would be very expensive. As he lifted it out of the container, he did not pick it up more than four inches above the ground, and he kept it there all the way to skids 

Power bolt removers attacked all four sides of the crate starting from the bottom up. There were eight on each corner and on the top. When the sides were unbolted, they hooked the cables to each corner and had the crane operator lift the crate straight up off the Fusion Engine. 

Delicious signaled everyone to step back, leaving Gordon standing by his engine. It took him a little while to realize that everyone was behind him, and waiting for him to unveil his engine. 

He stood there embarrassed, but he attacked the plastic wrapping with a furor. A moment later, everyone joined in the fun. When it was completely exposed, there was still more work to be done. The engine was bolted to the wooden base, and those bolts had to be removed before the Crane operator could slide the engine further up the skids. 

The massive electrical connections were very hard to figure out. Wes Purcell was taking no chances. Each male connection only fit one female receptacle. However that was not all he did to ensure proper installation. He did it by numbers and colors also. Number one, only fit number one, and they were both blue. There were a total of 16 connections to be made, and there was no chance of making a mistake. After each connection was made, they were twisted and locked into place. The connection points were sealed using a patented process invented by Doctor Grayson Thyme. They were hermetically, using a heat-treated, flexible, rubber compound that stayed flexible to temperatures of minus 100 degrees Kelvin. A process that should have taken eight hours to complete was completed in 100 minutes. 

Gordon and Delicious went to the control room to begin testing the electrical connections, and the primary engine functions. The results were off the scale. With a little help from a Sledhandler, the engine was moved a few inches up, and to the left on the skids. When it was properly aligned, it was connected to the rails, and pushed up into its final position, inside the spacecraft. Once it hit the stops, the locking rings snapped into place automatically. The L shaped rear stops moved down, and the side blocks locked into place. The nuclear engine was not going anywhere, except into the spacecraft. 

Gordon began the process of reeling in all 16 electrical cables excess on the floor. The computers did most of the work, but delicious and Gordon kept a wary eye on them, to be sure they did not foul on anything connected to the fusion engine. These were not tiny extension cords. Many of these cables were 10 inches in diameter, because they fed current to the Magnetic Drive Engines, the Ion/H2 Engines, and when it was extended outside the spaceship, it was the Primary Energy Producing Engine for the entire spaceship, plus its Main Propulsion Unit. 

As soon as the computer indicated each cable was done, four technicians entered the nuclear chamber, and routed the cables through flexible expansion joints. This technique would help guide the cables safely, when the engine was being moved outside the spacecraft, and then returned inside to its current position. 

When they left the compartment, other engineers came in, and began the process of connecting the cooling system. This system alone had 37 patents. It allowed for the use of Extending Flexible Non-Metal Reducing Tubing, when the engine had to be deployed. 

The Nuclear Regulator Commission said it could not be done safely. 

It took Gordon 20 minutes to prove them wrong. 

The Commission voted never to see this young man again. They forgot to keep that vote out of the minutes of the meeting. 

Somehow, that portion of the meeting was leaked to the press. 

**************** 

At 7:30 PM, the press started to arrive. They were taking down the side road, where they parked, and were led to rows of chairs that had been set out for them. 

Lights were purposely focused towards them, keeping the reporters from seeing anything towards the hangar. Since they didn't know the immense size of the spacecraft, whatever they could see was actually beneath it. 

Promptly at 8 o'clock, William walked up to the dais. 

"Good evening. Those of you who know me, or of me know that I rarely if ever talk to the press. Tonight is one of those rare occasions that I am so proud of the accomplishments of the people who worked so hard over the past seven years, and the 20 investors who gave billions of dollars to this private enterprise, that I am making an exception to that rule. 

What you are about to see is not a joke it is for real. It will take off from the spot it is in today on December 25, and proceed on a flight plan that astounds even me. It will be published well in advance to all scientific entities, the United States Government, and the press. I will tell you now that the ordinary layman will not understand one bit of it, because it took two days for me to understand the first part of the flight plan, and that only reached out to something called, 'The Heliopause.' You can look that up on your own time. 

You will not understand the speeds they will attain. The discoveries they have made along the way that have led to 617 patents this project has already produced for its investors. 

The men and women flying in this marvel of engineering and science will send information back to us, which may take generations to arrive here, because of the immense distances it will have to travel. 

This spacecraft is the brainchild of Doctor Even Luck. There is not one piece of metal in it, because one of the engines is the brainchild of his daughter Mrs. Delicious Luck Thyme. You will probably laugh when you hear what it is, but she has proven it works to 29 of the most prominent scientists in the United States, including Doctor Michael Oyster, of Caltech, who is in charge of NASA's Orion Mars program. 

Our spacecraft will be carrying 70 people, at a cost of just under $380 billion, supplied by 20 private investors. Our books are certified every six months, by different accounting firms, to verify where every penny goes. We are not going to Mars, we are going to pass Mars in 19 minutes, and continue on to deep space. One of our objectives is to see a planet being eaten by a black hole. If that doesn't scare you, nothing will. 

The Orion project will cost a minimum of $1 trillion. It will carry four people to Mars for a few days, and will take months to travel each way. If it weren't for Doctor Luck, and his five-year-old son, Gordon, those astronauts would have died before they reached the moon outbound, because their computer was giving them incorrect information. It was only because Orion was having a problem with its thrusters that Doctor Oyster asked Doctor Luck for help. After Doctor Luck and Gordon fixed the thrusters, they decided to go through the remainder of the program to see if there was anything else wrong with it. That's when they found several other major malfunctions with the life-support system and other items in the program that would have killed those fine astronauts. 

I have talked enough. We are going to light up the spacecraft so you can see it. You can come back tomorrow, when we are going to take our first test flight. We may only go up 100 feet to test our systems and come back down for a soft landing. You have never seen a government, or civilian rocket do that before, and I don't believe you will see it in the next 20 years. 

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the spaceship, "THE BEST LUCK." 

The lights facing the press corps died, and spotlights from every angle lit up the spacecraft. There was a chorus of invectives from the press as the saw 'The Beach Ball' for the first time. 

Then came the naysayers. 

"That thing can't possibly fly, it's too big. It's the wrong shape. Where are the engines? This is a scam. You can't build a spaceship for $380 billion. Etc." 

After all the comments died down, one reporter asked, "Can we see the inside of this spacecraft?" 

William replied, "Not one of you said the positive thing about this spacecraft. Why would you want to see the inside of it?" 

"I want to see if I am wrong." 

"Are you print or television media?" 

"Print, sir." 

"You, and one television reporter plus a cameraman, can go on the spaceship tomorrow, when it takes off. If you don't want to go, you may choose someone else to take your place. You may choose among yourselves which television reporter should go. You may continue taking pictures for the next 30 minutes, and then our agents will escort you from the grounds. If you are the lucky three that are chosen report to one of our agents and he will accompany you to the hanger to give you the information you will need for tomorrow. Good night ladies and gentlemen." 

Several reporters followed William as he walked towards the spacecraft. When he reached the base of one of the legs of the spacecraft, he turned right, and disappeared. 

As the reporters reached the same spot, one of them said, "Where the hell did he go? He was right here, and now he's gone." 

"If they've invented a transporter, I'm going with them." 

Even watched, and listened to the entire episode on his console on the third level and laughed. He couldn't wait to tell William what happened. 

******************* 

Gray was in contact with Fort Worth Air Traffic Control Center to verify the Notice To Airmen (NOTAM) was in place for tomorrow between the hours of 10 AM and 6 PM at 10,000 feet and below at a 25 mile radius of Temple. 

The Mr. Schiff checked his computer and verified that all the warnings had been issued, and the sector controller would be warned and a sign posted at his position tomorrow morning. 

Gray thanked him and was about to hang up, when the watch supervisor asked him a question. 

"Did someone build a private airport out there that we don't know about?" 

"No, we are going to take our spacecraft up for a little ride, and then we're going to land it back at our facility." 

"How much have you been drinking today son?" 

"You haven't heard about the spacecraft being built in southeastern Texas?" 

"Yes I have, but I have never heard of a spacecraft that can go up in the air, fly around, and soft land." 

"How far do you live from Temple?" 

"It's about a 95 mile drive." 

"Do you want to go flying tomorrow?" 

"In what?" 

"In the only thing that's allowed to be flying within a 25 mile arc of Temple Texas between 10 AM and 6 PM at 10,000 feet and below." 

"You want me to go along for a ride in the spacecraft?" 

"Only if you want to; I'm not going to twist your arm." 

"What time do you want me there?" 

"Don't be here any earlier than 9 AM. I like to eat a leisurely breakfast before I go flying. You will be my guest." 

"Can I bring my son?" 

"What is his name, and how old is he?" 

"His name is Adam, and he is 25 years old." 

"Sure, bring him along. They will stop you at the gate. Give them your name and tell them your guest of Doctor Grayson Thyme." 

"Okay Doctor, we will see you in the morning. 

Gray made another call. 

"Security." 

"Hi this is Doctor Grayson Thyme." 

"Hi Doc, this is Jamie Gilligan." 

"Hi Jamie, would you put on the list for tomorrow that I have two guests coming from the Fort Worth Air Traffic Control Center. Barry Schiff and his son Adam Schiff. I know the son is 25, I don't know how old the father is." 

"I'll bet you a dime he's older." 

"Was that your complete checkbook Jamie?" 

"Yes Doctor, I lost the rest in monopoly." 

"You have to watch those games of chance Jamie, they can kill you." 

"When we play Monopoly Doc, we play with real money." 

"You guys are out of your fucking minds." 

"So we've been told. Have a great night Doctor; we don't want to see you crash tomorrow." 

"I will guarantee you that will not happen tomorrow." 

***************** 

"William's cell phone rang at 10 PM, and he wondered who it could possibly be. He only hoped it was not another accident. 

"Yes?" 

"Sir, this is Jaden. You have a visitor." 

"I have a visitor at this time of night." 

"That is correct sir." 

"Whoever it is, tell them to come back tomorrow." 

"No sir, you will kill me if I do that." 

"Who is it Jaden." 

"If I tell you that person will kill me." 

"So you're caught between a rock and a hard place." 

"Yes sir, I'm dead either way." 

"I will make sure I hurt you more before you die." 

"If you were looking at the face I'm looking at sir, I don't think so." 

"Okay, I'll meet you at the front door." 

William opened the door, and exclaimed, "Laura, how wonderful to see you." 

"I'm sorry to bother you grandpa. My mother and father would not answer their cell phone or their home phone. I pounded on their front door, and on their bedroom window. I know their home because I could hear them in the bedroom. I would say they did not want to be disturbed, so you were my only hope. I hope you don't mind." 

"Mind, I'm delighted, come in." 

"Is Jenna still awake?" 

"You mean my night owl? Absolutely, I will call her." 

"Jemma, we have company. Laura is here." 

"What happened, did Patti kick her out of the house?" 

"No, it's better than that Jemma, she wouldn't let me in." 

"That bitch, she was probably screwing Stephano, and couldn't be bothered with her own daughter." 

"You're right on the money, that's exactly what she was doing." 

William said, "Your father is a lucky man." 

"Grandpa is my mother really like my grandmother?" 

"In many ways yes she is. However, you have to remember, your grandmother and I were not together for a very long. I did not get a chance to watch her blossom into full womanhood. All I get is stories from her friends from Glen Falls, just like your mother does." 

"Hello Laura, you look absolutely stunning. What possessed you to buy new clothes?" 

"It was an edict from my mother. Neither my sister nor I were allowed to wear sweat suits or jogging clothes any longer. She said we walk around town looking like bag ladies, and she's tired of it. She gave us a choice; we could go shopping by ourselves at upscale close stores, or she would take us. You've never gone shopping with my mother; it is not a pleasant experience." 

"I have gone shopping with your mother," William said. "I went with her to pick out her wedding dress. I was not going to stay; Stephano was not going to stay. No male was going to stay in that store. The owner is a friend of mine, and to make it easy on your mother she opened the store on a Sunday specifically for her. There was a little mix-up, so there was one other family there for the final fitting for the bride. Those people just happen to be Mrs. Julia Atwater, Dolores Free, and Sondra Hastings. Do you recognize any of those names Laura?" 

"Yes I do grandpa. You have the wife of a president, the wife of the director of the FBI, and the wife of the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. Not a bad three of the kind." 

"Would you like to know what your mother did in that prestigious company?" 

"I guess I would be a fool to say no." 

She walked into the showroom, saw that it was for wedding gowns, screamed, and ran out of the store. Your father had to run after her to stop her. I forgot to tell you one other thing, the store was run by some secondhand designer. Her name was Caralena Herrera." 

"You know Caralena Herrera?" 

"I gave her the money to start her first store." 

"Grandpa you are too much." 

"Don't tell him that Laura his head won't be able to fit outside the door." 

"How long have you two been married now?" 

"So help me God William, if you get this wrong, I'll kill you." 

"Come here Jemma, I want you within striking distance." 

He pulled her down on his lap and slapped her on her ass. 

"I hope you enjoyed that my husband, but you have a question to answer, and I have a rolling pin with your name on it if you get this question wrong." 

"Jemma and I will be married 29 years on 30 July. We were married by Supreme Court justice Sandra Day, with director of the FBI Michael Free, and the head of the New York field office of the Justice Department, whose name I don't recall, as witnesses." 

"How did I do dear, or should I tell her where we consummated our marriage that morning?" 

"Well we both know you didn't start Junior out on that evening. I think everyone on the third green knows where Junior was conceived. Hilton Head hasn't been the same since." 

Laura said, "You two are adventurous." 

"Laura you have no idea what your grandfather can get up to when it comes to sex." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



"Thank you for amending that sentence my dear, otherwise I might have had to take you inside, and give you a little corrective criticism." 

"I love your corrective criticism dear. It makes me tingle all over." 

"Did you to hear about the horrible thing that happened in Peru?" 

"What horrible thing happened in Peru?" 

"Someone assassinated their President." 

"I must admit I've been so busy preparing for tomorrow. I haven't read the newspaper." 

"What's going on tomorrow?" 

"What does your mother do; screw all day one day, and sleep all day the next." 

"That sounds about right grandpa." 

"Tomorrow morning we are taking 'The Best Luck' out for a test ride. Would you like to come along?" 

"Does an angel have wings? You couldn't keep me away with a shotgun at my head grandpa. I'm going to kill my mother for not telling me. I'm going to kill Dycke for not telling me. That's where I've been. I've been watching them build the stasis units. Now that they are to the point of mass production, I was not needed there any longer. Instead of going home and being alone, I decided to come here instead. It's a lucky thing I did. Would it be all right if I spent the night here?" 

"Do you think you'd have any better luck now getting into your mother house?" 

"My next move was to take one of the SUVs and drive through her bedroom window. That would've gotten her attention." 

"Laura, you are your mother's daughter." 

"Would you please explain that to me?" 

"When you are slighted, you don't react, you overreact. If someone hit you with a twig, instead of hitting them with branch; you would hit them with the entire tree." 

"You are correct grandpa. They would never hit me again." 

"You are your mother's child." 

"Mom keeps telling me I got the worst of both worlds. I got your genes, and Grandpa Bruno's temperament. When I asked her what she meant by that, she said, "I was going to live a very long time, and piss a lot of people off." 

"She's wrong Laura, you are the sweetest child I've ever known. The only person I've seen you get pissed off at is your mother, and she has deserved it 20 times over. I know she struggles with issues brought on by her youth, but she should not have laid them at her children's feet." 

"Let's not get into that grandpa, because every time we go down this road, your name pops up, and it hurts everyone, even mom." 

"I know honey, and if I could change things I would, but at the time I couldn't without getting everyone killed." 

"I'm tired; what time do we have to be there tomorrow morning?" 

"We can get there at 9:45 AM. The festivities start at 10:30 AM and lift off as scheduled for noon." 

"You are going to be on board aren't you grandpa?" 

"I'm afraid of heights." 

Jemma smacked him. 

"Mister Zabo, if you are afraid of heights who was the man that seduced me in first class at 35,000 feet nearly 31 years ago?" 

"Grandpa, you didn't." 

"Your grandfather certainly did." 

"You randy old goat you." 

"I may be old now young lady, I wasn't old 31 years ago. My Jemma was ravishing, and still is to this day. I wanted her the second I saw her, and I had her as dessert, after a rather poor meal. Didn't I dear?" 

"Yes he did, twice in the airplane, and four times during the evening in his room. I have not had another man since that day." 

"How about you grandpa?" 

"I am just like my beautiful Jemma. I have not had another man since that day." 

Jemma screamed, stood up, and threatened to hit him. She couldn't because he had her hands in his, and had the biggest smile on his face she had seen in years. Her demeanor changed. 

"You no good rotten bastard. You did that on purpose." 

"Of course I did it on purpose, I wanted to see how you would react, and I was right. You still love me as fiercely as you did the first day we met. What did we say to each other that day Jemma? What did we promise each other? Do you remember, I do. You said it was just another piece of paper, I said it was a binding two souls together. I meant it that day, and every other day since. I have not, and will not touch another woman, sexually, for the rest of my life." 

"Laura, your bedroom is down this hallway, and to the left. I have to take this ancient being upstairs, and kill him. I want to make sure he keeps his promise to me." 

"Jemma, grandpa is going to outlive us all." 

"I'll have a glass of wine to that." 

"You will not, if you do you'll fall asleep on me." 

"Falling asleep on you is one of my favorite positions." 

"Grandpa, you are so bad." 

************** 

Tuesday 8:30 AM 

Delicious had never seen Newton this angry before. Actually she had never seen him this angry ever. He was throwing a temper tantrum. 

"Why can't I go on the spaceship. Nothing's going to happen to it." 

"We know that Newton, it's just a safety precaution." 

"If it's a safety precaution I don't want you to go, I don't want to lose my mommy or my daddy." 

"We have to go. I have to control my engines, and daddy has to extend the ears while it is in flight." 

"Gordon can control the engines as well as you can. You don't have to go. There is nothing on the ears, and we both know they operate already. Daddy doesn't have to go. There is no good argument you can give me for going on this trip. It's only going to last a few minutes, so stay with me, we can watch it from the backyard." 

"Teddy shut up." 

"There is plenty of room on the spacecraft for everyone to go. If you go I want to go." 

"Newton you're not going." 

"Fine, when you come back I won't be here. You ran away from daddy, now I'm running away from you." 

"Don't forget to pack your lunch." 

"You forgot how smart I am mother, I'm sure I can get by. Enjoy your flight, and don't forget to tell the guards to keep a close eye on me. I wouldn't want them to be blamed for my disappearance." 

"Grayson get in here." 

"What's wrong baby?" 

"I told Newton he cannot go on the flight with us this morning." 

"That's correct." 

"His response was if he can't go, he doesn't want us to go because we are not needed. Technically he's correct. However we both want to be at our stations and monitor everything that goes on during the test flight, instead of reading the printouts tomorrow. We want to see how the ship reacts as it climbs and maneuvers, but again that will be on the printouts. However, I told him we are going, and he is staying at home. He accepted that and said he would not be here when we come back. He said I ran away from you, now he's running away from me. Is there anything you want to say to your son?" 

"Yes I do. Take some extra food and a change of clothes. Have a nice life." 

"Thanks dad I knew you wouldn't interfere. I'm going to head to Houston. I have something I think they might be interested in." 

"What might that be?" 

"You know I can't tell you that. I believe it's patentable material, and although I will not get full credit for it, I will not give them the complete information until I see a private attorney at their expense. You know how they work; you used to work for them." 

Gray reached for his wallet, pulled out $300 and gave it to Newton. 

"I don't want you walking on the side of the road. It's too dangerous. This will get you to the train station, Houston, and the Space Center. Tell them you're my son and you take it from there. Good luck." 

"Delicious take Teddy, we have to leave. I'll get the diaper bag." 

Delicious had Teddy in her arms when she kissed Newton goodbye and wished him the best life he could ever imagine. 

Gray shook his son's hand. "I never thought this would happen so soon. I thought we would have many more years together as father and son, to grow up together, and to learn about each other. I guess you learned a lot faster than I did. Goodbye Newton, you are great son." 

"You are great dad. Maybe one day we'll see each other again." 

"No, I'm leaving in December, you're staying here." 

"I guess if someone has to stay, it may as well be me. Goodbye dad." 

**************** 

Tuesday 9:30 AM 

The members of the flight crew, and the safety division began trickling in at the hangar at 9:30 AM. They went to one area of the hangar that was cordoned off specifically for them. 

A second section was cordoned off for family members, and a third for special guests who had been invited. 

The guests and family members would be seated in the theater, which could accommodate 70 people. The seats were equipped five point safety straps, the type you would find in a jet fighter, or the space shuttle. The reason would become obvious as soon as the ship began to take off. You didn't want to encounter G forces pounding down on your shoulders and neck while taking off. You wanted to be lying flat on your back, and have them spread out along your entire body and have that pressure ameliorated as you are pushed into the soft mattress behind it. 

When Rosalynn arrived with no children in tow, she looked miserable. Rod was doing his best to make her feel better. The only thing that made her brighten up and feel human was when Delicious put Teddy in her arms. She glowed like the beacon on top of a lighthouse. As more of the younger children started gravitating to her, the happier she became. 

As Even and Jennifer walked over to say hello, Even began to laugh. 

Rosalynn said, "Before you say a nasty word, what's your problem mister?" 

"Roz, do you remember the day I brought Delicious home, and Rod told you he was going to have a vasectomy?" 

"Yes." 

"You thanked him, because you didn't want to carry any more children. You thought he was the best husband in the world, because you would do anything to break your religious vows against contraceptives. Today you would do anything in this world to be able to have six more children." 

"Even, if it wasn't true, I'd beat the shit out of you. You have no idea how I miss my kids." 

"What's keeping your kids from having grandkids?" 

"Three are still in graduate school three are in college and the last 1 is just finishing high school." 

"Since when has that had anything to do with having children?" 

"Three of them are good Catholic girls, who know if they spread their legs before marriage I would sew them closed permanently. The others are good Catholic boys, who know if they get a girl pregnant, they would get married the next day, regardless of what she looked like in the morning. That could be a deterrent to fooling around carelessly." 

Delicious said, "Roz, you have to remember, when I got off that airplane Rod told you that you were never to speak to me ever. I was the devil reincarnate, and I was not to be trusted. You found out why when you got home, and he slept in his office for the next four days." 

"Those with the best four nights of sleep I ever had." 

"Where's Newton Delicious?" 

Delicious started to tear. 

Delicious where is Newton?" 

"I don't know daddy, I don't know." 

"Come with me." 

I took her to a deserted area of the hangar, sat her down, and looked into her eyes. 

"Delicious, tell me what's going on." 

"No children were allowed on today's flight. When I told him he couldn't go, he had a temper tantrum. Then he used logic and said I wasn't needed on today's flight, and neither was Gray. He was right on both counts. Both Gray and I wanted to go, and we were not going to let him dictate to us what was happening in our household. When I told him I was going, he said he wouldn't be there when I got back. I told him make sure he took some extra food. I called Gray and told him what was happening. Gray told him to take some extra food, a change of clothes, and gave him $300 to get to Houston. Newton said he had something that they may be interested in, and it may be patentable. Gray wished him the best, told him to use his name when he got there, shook his hand, and we left. That's why I don't know where my son is dad, and it's killing me." 

"If I'm not back take off without me." 

Even got up and raced towards the security exit. 

Delicious screamed, "Dad 'NO.' 

Tammy ran up to Delicious and asked, "Where the hell is he going?" 

"He's going to find Newton." 

"Is he lost?" 

"Sort of." 

"Delicious, my patient just ran out of here, which he's not supposed to do. I need to know how much strain he's under. On a scale of 1 to 10 how bad is it for him?" 

"30." 

"Fuck!" Do you have any idea or where he's going?" 

"He's probably going to the train station." 

"Nobody is to know about this, nobody. We don't need a panic. I going to take two security vehicles, and find your father and your son. Everything else stays normal, can you do that?" 

Delicious could not answer. 

Tammy smacked her. "Delicious did you hear what I said. Nobody is to know about this. I'm going two take to security vehicles with me, and we are going to find your father and your son. Everything stays normal, can you do that?" 

"Yes, yes I can do that." 

"Where is Gray?" 

"He's in the area with the flight crew." 

"Good I'll bring you to him." 

Tammy yelled, "Gray, Gray, over here." 

Tammy explained everything she knew to Gray, and gave him her hand. 

Delicious looked at him and said, "Daddy said to take off without him if he's not back." 

"Only your father would say that on his day." 

Tammy said, "That's because he's crazy." 

******************* 

Tuesday 10:15 AM 

Newton was sitting on the floor of his bedroom backing his little suitcase, trying to decide what was absolutely necessary, and what was not. 

"Hi sport, can I give you a hand with that?" 

"No grandpa, I've got it. I'm not going to be able to take too much." 

"You can take everything you have. I've got a car outside." 

"Yes but you take off at 12 o'clock today." 

"I'm only an engineer, I'm not needed anymore. My job is done. Where do you want to go?" 

"I want to go up in the spaceship, but my parents wouldn't let. So I'm leaving." 

"I didn't ask you that, I asked you where you wanted to go." 

"I told them I was going to Houston." 

"So pack up and I'll take you Houston." 

"I don't want to go to Houston." 

"Where do you want to go Newton? 

"I want to go for a ride in the spaceship." 

"The rules say you can't go." 

"Who made up those stupid rules?" 

"I did. I did it for everyone's safety. The seatbelts that are in the spaceship now are not adjustable for children your size. That's why no children are allowed on this trip. When we leave in December and everything is the way it's supposed to be you will be on board the spacecraft, but not one day before." 

"Why didn't my mommy tell me that this morning?" 

"Your mommy didn't know the reason for those rules. Your mommy does her job; I do my job; your daddy does his job. It's the way things get done properly. 

********* 

"Hello Doctor Luck, Newton, I hope I'm not disturbing you." 

"Newton you know my nurse Tammy don't you?" 

"Yes we've met several times before." 

"She's going to yell at me. I'm not supposed to go anyplace without her, but when your mommy didn't know where you were I had to find you in a hurry. I didn't want to worry about you too. Okay, you may take my blood pressure, and yell at me. However you will see I am fine." 

"Doctor, if you're not, you're going to sleep right where you are." 

"Newton, be careful. You may trip over me if something is wrong with my blood pressure. This angel behind me can put me to sleep very quickly." 

"Give me your other arm Doctor; something must be wrong with this arm." 

After checking both arms, Tammy said, "Doctor, you have to worry about your grandson more often; your blood pressure is 117 over 68, and your pulse rate is 66. You could not ask for anything better than this. Please keep it up. When Janice and Hannah see these numbers, they are going to think I was drinking." 

The front door of the house opened in a woman's voice yelled, "NEWTON!" 

Newton bounced up off the floor, and yelled, "MOMMY!" 

I looked at Tammy and said, "It's beginning to look like old home week here." 

"Doctor, you have to get back to your spaceship. You are running out of time." 

"My grandson is more important to me than my spaceship. I had to make sure he was all right before I could think of anything else." 

Delicious said, "It's okay dad, you can go, I'm going to stay with Newton." 

"Absolutely not, you are needed on that ship. You have two engines that have to be monitored. I have nothing to do, except sit there like a bump on a log. You get back there young lady, and do your job. Newton and I will stay here and watch you take off. He understands why he cannot go on this trip, which is something not even you understood, because it was not spelled out in the rules." 

"You are both wrong," Newton said. "You are both going on grandpa's spaceship. I will stay with the Richard and Holden, which is where I belong this time. If you try to keep me off the next time, I will break the computers." 

I laughed, and picked up my grandson. Then I realized what I did, and looked at Tammy. 

She shot me a frown that froze me. Then she broke into a smile that melted my heart. 

"Newt, it's time that we head back to the NEST. People are going to wonder where we are, and we don't want to disappoint them do we?" 

"No grandpa, we don't. Please don't let mommy drive, I would like to get there in one piece." 

"NEWTON, how could you say such a nasty thing about my driving?" 

"It's very easy mom. I've been in the car with you a lot, while you drive it. If grandma wasn't talking to Teddy and me at the same time, both of us would have to go to a psychiatrist with you, for scream therapy." 

I immediately got between my grandson and my daughter, because there was blood in her eyes. 

"Delicious, remember I've been in cars with you when you drive long distances. I remember the emblems on those trucks coming at us very clearly; too clearly." 

"Dad, I only had my license for a few months back then. I've been driving for nine years now, I am a little better." 

"I'm glad you used that word dear, so I didn't have to use it. You are only a 'LITTLE' better." 

"Tammy, take his blood pressure. It will be the last time he will have one, because I'm going to kill him." 

"You two listen to me. It's 11:15 AM. They are going to button up the ship at 11:40 AM. Regardless of what Newton said, if you two want to be on it, we have to move now." 

"Newton are you absolutely sure?" 

"Let's get going grandpa, I'm sure." 

"Okay, let's go." 

As we opened the front door to leave, there was a line of black SUVs waiting for us. Strangely, Monty was standing at the bottom of the steps waiting for us. 

"Why aren't you holding my son's hand Monty?" 

"That little imp of yours gave me an order for the first time in our relationship. I will get even with him later today, but for now, I will follow it. Doctor Luck, Mrs. Thyme, get your asses in the car. People are waiting for you, and that spaceship is not moving until you get there." 

"I gave an order that that ship takes off at noon, regardless if I'm there are not." 

"Get in the car Doctor, your son countermanded that order. Don't make me carry you, because I will if I have to." 

Newton yelled, "Monty, carry him, I want to see it." 

"Okay." 

"Don't you.." I was about to say the word dare, but I was already over her shoulder, and everyone around me was laughing, including my grandson. There was no sense arguing at this point. 

She put me down by the SUV that was to take me to the NEST, and like a gentleman, I thanked her for the ride. Strangely enough, Monty curtsied. Where was a camera when you needed one? 

We arrived with 10 minutes to spare. There must've been 10,000 people lining the roadway to the NEST, and on the property itself. William was still at the podium, when he heard people start to applaud. He looked to his left, and saw me approaching. He said to those in attendance, "Here comes the only man in the history of the human race, who would be late for his own birthday." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 24



The crowd roared. 

I joined William on the platform, and hugged him fiercely. He pointed to the microphone, and asked me to say a few words, because that's the amount of time you have left before we have to start closing the spaceship. Everyone is already on board, except to you. 

"Thank you very much for being here today. If you have electronic watches, they are all going to die when the spaceship takes off. I am truly sorry about that, but one of our engines is so secret that we could not let that information out of the bag until this moment. If you wish to leave, you have 15 minutes to get out of range. William said I would be late for my own birthday, and he's probably correct. However, this spaceship would not be outside today, ready for its maiden flight if it wasn't for my friend, and mentor William Zabo. When I became ill, there was no other man in the world who could have stepped in and kept this project going except for William. Many people are smart. Some are exceedingly smart in one particular area. Some are brilliant in science; some are brilliant in finance; some are brilliant in art. William Zabo is brilliant in all aspects of life." 

"Colonel Lucius Canyon, are you here?" 

"I am over here Doctor Luck." 

"Colonel, who was the most brilliant person you have ever met?" 

"William Zabo, Doctor, without a doubt." 

"General Dan Morgan, are you here?" 

"I am here Doctor Luck." 

"Three of our people were involved in a car accident in which two of our people died. We had a failing hospital with extinct equipment, and terrible customer relations. Would you tell these people what happened please." 

"William Zabo purchased the hospital, threw out every piece of antiquated equipment, and brought in equipment that is state of the art. 

Jemma Zabo is now the chief executive officer of the hospital. If she gets a complaint of poor customer service by any employee, that employee is sent to her office, and warned. If that employee is involved in a second offense, that employee is fired. If you are ever unfortunate enough to go to our local hospital, you will see a brand-new attitude, and brand-new equipment; and it's all because of William Zabo." 

"Neighbors, this is exactly what I'm talking about. It doesn't matter what challenge is put in front of William, he always rises to the top. I am honored to say he is my friend, and William is the Savior of this project." 

I stepped back from the podium, stretched my arm out, and pointed to William. The crowd stood up and applauded wildly. 

If William had a machine gun, he would have shot me dead 1 million times. He does not like public acclaim, but with all the television cameras, and newspaper people in attendance, he was going to get a ton of it. 

I moved back to the podium after a few minutes. "We have to leave you now, and enter our spacecraft for its maiden flight. It may be a short flight, it may be a little bit longer, depending on what we see, while we are in the air. Goodbye ladies and gentlemen, enjoy the show. We will be back, sooner or later." 

I waved, took William by the arm and we walked off the stage towards "The Best Luck." 

"Even, you are a dead man." 

"I sure came close enough, don't you think?" 

"Don't go there with me; you disobeyed orders. I should have sent you back to Anderson and had them tie you down 

I slid by that argument, and said, "She looks naked without the names on it. We will take care of that in the next month." 

"Even, she is a thing of beauty as it is." 

"That she is, William that she is." 

I heard a noise up above us, and looked. Apparently NASA was not as disinterested as they seemed to be. A G159 Gulfstream prop jet aircraft was circling our area above the restricted altitude. I pointed it out to William, and we both laughed. 

We reached one of the six legs of the spacecraft, and got in. The elevators in each leg were designed to carry up to 10 people at one time. There were also cargo elevators that extended out from the port and starboard sides. 

When we exited on the second floor, we were greeted by the security staff. They helped us get into our one-piece uniforms. This was an absolute necessity, because we didn't want any buttons, or coins to fall out of anyone's pockets and gum up any of the magnificent machinery we had on board. 

I asked security if everyone was on board, and they said yes. I told them to lock down the elevator shafts, seal the compartments airtight, and advise the bridge when they had a green light. 

Security took William to the auditorium, and escorted me to the bridge. I didn't understand this, because there was no room for me up there. I did understand as soon as I arrived on the main deck. 

Gray yelled, "Attention: Captain on Deck." 

As one, they all stood at attention, and turned towards me. I turned around and looked for Jennifer. 

Gray said, "At ease, return to your duties." 

He walked over to me, and asked for a moment of my time. 

We turned our backs to the rest of the crew, and he began talking to me. 

"Dad, don't react to anything I'm going to say, until I finished. Then you can beat the shit out of me if you want. Delicious does not know this, but Newton told me that Jennifer was not going along on our trip. I asked him how he knew, and he said grandma told him. I told him not to say a word to anyone, ever. I arranged a meeting with Jennifer, and asked her what was going on between you two. She said, "Nothing, everything is fine, why do you ask?" 

"Why aren't you going on our trip with us?" 

She said, "Oh shit, how did you find out?" 

"Newton." 

"Who else knows?" 

"No one and it's going to stay that way, until I find out why." 

"When Even sees his sister, he's going to kill her, again. Gray, I can't tell you how secret this has to remain. Please keep it to yourself, and not a whisper to anyone else. I'm staying behind, because Holden is not going. Even overheard him speaking with Newton, and told me he has wonderful plans for his future, here on Earth. The only reason I was going, was my family was going. When Even told me Holden was staying behind, I could not let him stay alone. He will only be 10 years old, and I would not let him stay behind, without a parent to guide him. 

I hate my husband. Leave it to him to cut both our hearts out and to be absolutely logical at the same time. 

We are going to sign divorce paperwork, in advance, and have it notarized. 

He is abandoning me to go into space and he will not be returning. I don't remember how many hours he said it would be before you are scheduled to passed Pluto, however, when you are not back on Earth by that time, Rod will serve the divorce paperwork to the local court. It should take effect in 7 to 10 days. 

I will get everything. If anything ever happens to me, Holden gets it, with Rosalynn Laver as his caretaker, and Rod Laver as his attorney, until he reaches 21 years of age." 

"What is Holden going to do?" 

"I don't know. Even would not tell me." 

"In that case no one will ever know." 

"That's my husband. How is this cloning thing going?" 

Gray laughed. "If a geneticist tried to clone Even's genes', his computers would go up in flames. There is no one as smart as, or as confusing as your husband. You have to love that man; I know I do. He has taught me more about science in the last seven years, then I would've ever learned working at NASA. Even opens minds to different ways of thinking about scientific possibilities. NASA closes them down into little cubbyholes. The best scientists are in schools, teaching like Even taught me. The only problem is they are not as good as Even." 

"Your secret is safe with me Jen. I won't even dream about it." 

"Thank you Gray, it's hard enough thinking I won't see him after Christmas. My bed is going to be very empty." 

"Move back to Denver as soon as you can. There is everything Holden needs there, while he grows up. Do you remember how to get the big elevator down to the basement?" 

"Yes, he showed me how to do it." 

"Good, then the only thing you'll have to get Holden, are the Exascale computers, and he is set. Have Even take care of that before we leave." 

Jennifer threw her arms around Gray and hugged him. "I'm losing my whole family." 

"You still have your side of the family living in the Denver area. Make up with them, and move along with your life. Who knows, you may take another trip on an airplane, and bump into someone who wants to travel to the center of the Earth." 

Jennifer smacked him. "That was not funny Gray that was not funny at all." 

"Funny, I didn't mean it to be funny. I was deathly serious." 

"If I had a gun, you would be dead." 

"No, you would have hurt me, but you wouldn't have killed me." 

"Men, you always use logic when you have a woman upset." 

"Go home Jennifer, your husband is going to wonder where you are." 

"What about you Mister Thyme; is your wife going to be wondering what woman you are sleeping with tonight?" 

"No, she knows I'm sleeping with her." 

"Get away from me Grayson, before I smack you." 

"Good night mother; it's been my pleasure." 

************* 

As far as the bridge crew was concerned at this moment, Jennifer is not feeling well, and you are filling in for her. Captain Jean Luc Picard, do you want to play or not? We have five minutes before takeoff." 

I smiled. "Yes Number 1, I'll play." 

I went on the intercom and made a general announcement. Disengage all seat locks. Verify all restraint belts are secured tightly. Security; do your checks, and proceed to your assigned stations." 

"Bring the atomic engine online to one percent." 

Gordon said, "Aye Captain, one percent." 

"Disengage all exterior connections." 

"Sir, ground crew verifies all exterior connections have been disengaged." 

"Atomic engine to two percent." 

"Aye Captain two percent. 

"Waiting for green light on Magnetic Drive Grid." 

"Magnetic Drive Grid at 879MW and climbing." 

"Number 1, what is the time?" 

"Sir the time is 11:59:37." 

"Mrs. Thyme am I going to make my lift off time, on time, or am I going to be late?" 

"I have never caused you to be late before. Magnetic Drive Grid 997MW." 

"On my mark five, four, three, two, one, execute." 

*************** 

Everyone on the outside of the spacecraft was waiting for that magic moment, when flames would erupt, and that ear splitting sound would announce the spacecraft was soaring into the air. 

They were both disappointed, and in awe as they watched "The Best Luck" rise lazily into the sky. It looked like a giant hot air balloon, with no gondola underneath it. 

"Altitude 100 feet Captain." 

"Maintain and perform checks." 

"Captain requesting 1200 MW for the Magnetic Drive Engine. She will not hold steady at 100 feet at 997 MW." 

"1200 MW is approved." 

"Temperature on the nuclear engine?" 

"430° Captain, she's cool as a cucumber." 

"Your answer was supposed to be 430° Mister Luck. Nobody asked you about a cucumber." 

"Yes dad, I apologize for that slip in protocol." 

"That will be one lap around the outside of the spacecraft when we get on the ground Mister." 

"Okay dad." 

Everyone sitting at the command stations laughed. 

"Gordon stop that, this instant." 

"Why, did you stop being my father, or did this stop being my engine?" 

"I think I'm beginning to lose control of my ship." 

Delicious said, "Dad did you ever believe you had control of the ship? Remember, you told us you will only an engineer." 

This comment struck me right in my heart. I could not believe it was my daughter that said it. 

"Gray, my daughter is correct. I relinquish command of the ship to you. I'm going down to be with our guests." 

"I refuse Captain. You will have to find someone else to command this ship." 

"Delicious, you are third-in-command, you now have control of the ship. I resign." 

"I refuse Captain. Pick someone else, I have to keep control over my magnetic engines." 

"We seem to have a mutiny on the bridge. I am told that I do not have the qualifications to be the captain of this spacecraft, yet no one on this bridge crew wishes to take over for me. Make up your mind people, we are 100 feet above the ground, if anything goes wrong we are going to kill a lot of people." 

Delicious said, "I'm sorry I said that dad. First of all, it was not true, but most of all this is your spacecraft. Without you none of this would be sitting here." 

"Okay, it appears I am still the captain. Let's get back to work." 

"What is the situation with hovering now?" 

"1200 MW is more than enough Captain. Would you like me to drop it to 1100 MW to see if it will hold there?" 

"No, leave it where it is. We are going to go for a little ride. Unlock your seats, and your consoles. Make your altitude 500 feet; where is the Gulfstream now?" 

"500 feet sir, the Gulfstream is off our starboard quarter and 11000 feet." 

"Gray, extend Mickey Mouse." 

"Aye Captain, Mickey Mouse extending." 

"Captain, Mickey Mouse is fully extended." 

"Helmsman." 

"Yes dad." 

"Oh fuck this. Gordon, take dead aim on that Gulfstream. Take us to 9000 feet, not 1 inch higher, and not 1 inch further than 25 miles from the NEST. 1500 miles per hour should do it" 

"Yes sir, do you want me to change their underwear as we passed by?" 

"No. Hang on everyone. Does everyone in the theater see the NASA aircraft on our view screens? We are going to give them the thrill of their lifetime. Watch them closely, and hang on to your seats. This is going to be fun." 

*************** 

The pilot and the scientists on board the aircraft were looking at the spacecraft hovering, and marveling at its capability to do so. Suddenly, at an astounding rate of speed, it was coming at them. The pilot pushed the throttles to the stops, dropped his right wing, and tried to run away from the big black ball that was coming for him. He couldn't descend, because that was restricted airspace. He only hoped that the people flying that thing new what they were doing. 

Gordon passed directly underneath the Gulfstream, moved out to the 25-mile mark, stopped, and hovered. 

Everyone in the auditorium felt their seatbelts dig into their shoulders and hips as they came to a complete stop in the matter of half a second. It was a breathtaking experience. As they continued watching their screens and listening to the conversation between the pilot, and I, it must've sounded very funny to them. 

The pilot kept looking over his left shoulder for the spacecraft. The copilot tapped him on the shoulder and pointed directly in front of them. 

I asked, "Gray how do we contact them?" 

"127.55 is the frequency they normally use Captain." 

"Should we see if they want to play Gray?" 

"No, we shouldn't sir." 

"I'm sure glad I am the captain." 

"NASA aircraft at my 12 o'clock position, what are your intentions?" 

"Spacecraft off my starboard wing, where the hell is your 12 o'clock position, you are a big basketball?" 

"For the sake of argument, let's just say I'm looking right at you." 

"I repeat, "What are your intentions?" 

"I asked you first." 

"Okay, since everyone's lunch is on the cabin floor, because of your last maneuver, we are here just to keep an eye on you." 

"Gordon on my mark, I want us on the other side of the restricted area. Tell me when you're ready." 

"Aye Captain." 

"Coordinates are set in, and speed is 1500 miles per hour." 

"You are here to keep an eye on us, is that correct?" 

"Yes sir that is correct." 

"Aren't you on the wrong side of the restricted area to keep an eye on us? " Now Gordon. 

"Where the hell did you go?" 

"We are over here, on the other side of the restricted area from you, of course. We just wanted to show you what a real spacecraft, built by an independent company could do for under $400 Billion. We are finished playing with you for today. We are going to go home to let our public see us play in the local area, before we land. Enjoy yourselves gentlemen, because we are no longer a secret. 

One more thing, tell those idiots back at headquarters that the reason they're spending $1 trillion on a new rocket that will take them to Mars in four months, is because they get rid of people like Doctor Grayson Thyme, instead of nurturing scientists like him. They refused to give these scientists the leeway to do their best work; and they suffocate their ingenuity. Without him, and scientists like him, who work for us, building this ship would not have been possible." 

"While your new spacecraft will take four months to reach Mars, we will be passing it in 12 minutes. 58 minutes later, we will be passing Jupiter. Where will your new rocket be in 70 minutes? Goodbye for now, we are heading home now. We will go slowly so your cameras can watch us." 

"Delicious, 200 mph while we are around the NEST. " 

"Will do Captain." 

"Gray, as soon as we begin hovering, retract Mickey Mouse." 

"Aye Captain." 

40 minutes after playing in the local area, I announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to land. Place your seats in the upright position, and press the lock button. 

Security do your checks and return to your stations. When everything is secure, press your green lights." 

Gray announced, "Retracting Mickey Mouse," and a moment later he said, "Mickey Mouse is secured." 

As soon as everything inside the spacecraft was secure, I told Gray to lower the landing gear, and lock them into position. 

"Captain, I have a red light on number five. I will retract the landing gear, and I will try it again." 

"Don't do it yet Gray, I want to try something." 

"Gordon climb to 1000 feet." 

"Roger Captain, 1000 feet." 

"Gordon on my mark I want you to start a descent at 200 feet per minute. When we reach 700 feet, I want you to climb quickly to 1000 feet, and drop to 500 feet and stop. I want to see if something is in there blocking the mechanism." 

I announced to everyone in the theater when we were going to do, and why we were going to do it. There was no emergency, because we could land on five legs easily. Hang on tight, because here we go. 

"Is everyone on the bridge strapped in tight?" 

A chorus of 'Aye Captain's filled the bridge. 

"Gordon execute." 

As easily as an aircraft descends on final approach, The Good Luck descended from 1000 feet slowly, directly over the landing zone. A minute and half later our dissent stopped, and we were quickly up at 1000 feet. Abruptly, we dropped to 500 feet, being weightless for a millisecond." 

Gordon said, "500 feet, and hovering dad." 

"Gray how is that light now?" 

"Sir, to quote another crew member, it is as green as a cucumber." 

"That will be one lap around the spacecraft for you also Doctor Thyme." 

"Gracefully accepted Captain, but I think we should check number five to see what was causing that glitch." 

"I believe that would be the prudent thing to do, but now let's land our spacecraft." 

"Delicious, power down to 1200 megawatts. 

"1200 MW aye Captain." 

"We are over the bull's-eye Captain." 

"Reduce the nuclear engine to 2%." 

"Nuclear engine to 2%." 

"250 feet Captain." 

"Nuclear engine to 1%." 

"Nuclear engine to 1% Captain 

"Touchdown." 

"Nuclear engine to .02%, and secure." 

"Nuclear engine .02% and secured. 

"Interior lights to normal. From this point on, the nuclear engine area is to be guarded 24/7. It will be the only source of power for the entire ship. Good work everyone. Download your computers for the debriefing, and bring your readouts to the hanger. We will start the debriefing there, and we will continue them all day tomorrow. We have an awful lot to discuss, and they lot of work to finish."" 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

120. Detonation

"Hello Anna, why are you calling so late? It's after 11 PM, is everything okay between you and Cloudy?"

"Mom, Cloudy couldn't be more wonderful if he tried. I love him so much, and he loves me. We'd like to set a date for the wedding, but we need to know when you and dad are available. You're always running around, and dad is always so busy with the project down in Texas. If you want to help us plan the wedding, it would be wonderful. However, we can do it by ourselves if you are too busy."

"Have you spoken to his family about this?"

"Believe it or not, they don't like me very much. They don't mind my money, but they think I'm a spoiled bitch. I don't think I've acted that way around them, and neither does Cloudy, but that's the impression he gets when he speaks to them alone."

"Do you want your father and me to speak to them?"

"Mother that's the last thing in this world I want to happen. I know how you are, but more importantly, you know how you are. If they say one bad word about the family, you will use your gun on them, without worrying about the charges that will be brought against you."

"A lot of people, in high places, owe me a lot of favors, Anna. Don't worry about the charges, there won't be any."

"Mother, just think about the wedding, do you want to help us or not?"

"I want to give you the biggest and best wedding ever held in the United States. Whatever you, and Cloudy want you will have. I will try to keep my opinions at bay. I can't guarantee it will work all the time, but I will try."

"Now what about Cloudy; do you think his family wants to be involved?"

"Mom, I think they look at dollar signs, and don't want to spend a penny of their money."

"Honey that's fine; heaven knows we have more money than we will ever spend in 100 lifetimes. It also makes the seating arrangements very easy. We will have the wedding in Austin. We will pay for all their travel expenses, hotels, food, and entertainment."

"Thank you mom that solves more problems than you possibly can imagine."

"I've waited since the day the three of you were born to throw a big wedding. After all you did for me, through my terrible years; it warms my heart that it's you."

"Don't you dare make me cry."

"Why not, I'm crying."

"Now I have to tell you something else mom; and I don't know how you are going to take it. You may have to plan a wedding for your other daughter, or it may be her first liaison."

"Have you talked to Laura? I've been trying to get a hold of her all evening. Her phone is disconnected."

"It's not disconnected mom; she turned it off. She is at a man's house, somewhere in Fort Worth."

"I'm going to ask you this very calmly. Was that man's name Adam Schiff?"

"Yes it was."

"Did she say what she was doing there?"

"This is the part I don't think you want to know mom."

"Anna, as God is my witness, if you don't tell me everything you know, I will crawl through the radio waves these phones work on, grab you by the throat, and beat the shit out of you until you tell me."

"Mother, please remain calm. Remember she's 24 years old. She has the right to do anything she wants with her body."

"Anna, stop stalling."

"While I was talking with Adam, Laura was undressing him. He was telling me everything she was doing, while she was doing it, piece by piece. As she did it, Adam would say, she just removed my shirt; I am now bare chested. She has my legs saddled, as she's removing my boots. She's sitting on my chest, opening my belt and unbuttoned the button of my jeans and is getting ready to remove them... and so on."

Then Laura took the phone from him. She said, "Anna, I am going to be a little busy for the next few hours experiencing many new things about a man's anatomy. I should have done this year ago, instead of waiting for mom to get me so angry that I'm doing it this way. If mom comes knocking at his door, I will do the same thing to her as did to me the other night. I am turning off my phone just like she did, and I hope she has to sleep on the grass."

"I am going to kill that bitch with my bare hands. I brought her up better than that. She just met that man. She doesn't know what diseases he may have. I'm going to go there and pull her out of his house by her hair if I have to, but she's coming home with me."

"I wouldn't bet my grandchildren on that mother. Her guards are faithful to her. She pays them not you. I don't think you want to start a firefight in the middle of the night."

"I'll firebomb his house, and grab her when she comes running out."

"Mother, stop this. You are going to do nothing of the kind. She's going to get laid. I did, and I haven't changed. It was a very loving, and enlightening experience."

"Are you pregnant?"

"No, but I've stopped taking my birth control pills."

"I think we should do this wedding in the next two months, don't you?"

"Cloudy graduates next month, and his family is going to throw a big party for him. Anytime after that would be fine with us."

"I'll see if I can steal Jemma for two weeks, and we will fly to New York to see Carolina Herrera and get your wedding dress started. I'll call her and give her a heads-up. She will be thrilled. She did mine, now she's doing yours. Your sister can't get knocked up, because she can't go into space pregnant. I hope she remembers that while she's fucking him tonight. I am going to ring her neck, and leave her in a landfill, the next time I see her."

"Stuff it mother, you are going to do nothing of the kind. If you were going to kill any of us, you would have killed Robert years ago."

"That's true, but Robert still has a job. He's had it for almost 15 months, and they are still paying him voluntarily. Who would've thought that was even a possibility?"

"Do you watch him when he is interviewed on C-SPAN, or CNBC?"

"Yes I do. I can't believe he's the same boy who lived in our house for 22 years."

"The election is in November, can you imagine if she wins."

"She's only behind by four points, and that's within the margin of error in the polls. Look at the people she has behind her. Her dad can't go out electioneering for her because he's on the Supreme Court. However, he's always on the stage with her, and just his presence means a lot. Julia and Clark are there any time they can be, because of their health, and ages. Robert is there, and apparently, he is giving them good advice. They have a ton of money behind them, between the Atwater's, their parent's, and Robert, so they can't be outspent. They haven't made one mistake on the campaign trail so far. If the incumbent does, it's all over but the shouting."

"Don't get angry with me mother, but have you noticed that both the candidate and her sister are always glowing when they're on stage?"

"Yes, they both look extremely happy."

"Do you ever wonder if Robert has anything to do with it?"

"That was a horrible thing to say, about a political candidate, and her sister, Anna."

"We've both seen a lot of women candidates take the stage over the years, mom. They may smile for the cameras, as they are walking to the stage, and away from it.

However, they all looked haggard and gray from the stress and travel commitments of the campaign when they get back to the privacy of their own rooms. Sandy and Cindy have only five months to go until Election Day, and those two look fresh as a daisy."

"Maybe they had a good makeup team."

"No makeup man can put apples on your cheeks like that mother, and you know it."

"My son has no shame. He is fucking both those women."

"It certainly looks that way mom."

"Maybe that's how they're paying him."

"Heaven knows he doesn't need the money, and they are great looking woman for their age."

"What do you mean for their age; they are my age."

"That's why I said it mom. They look as good as you do."

"That was a very nice save Anna. They must have taught you that in college."

"They did mother. It was the first chapter on 'Peace Negotiations."

"Smart ass."

"I love you mom."

"I love you too baby. I will call you when I can get Jemma free for a week."

"You have a deal. I'm going to get laid now, just like your other daughter is."

"Did you have to remind me of that?"

"You know I couldn't let you get away free as a bird."

"Bitch."

"Remember, everything I know, you taught me."

"You had to slide a knife between my ribs, didn't you?"

"Get laid mother, that's probably what your triplets are doing tonight."

"I don't like the way this phone call is ending."

"That's because you didn't win, and nearly lost."

"I should never have sent you to college. You are smarter than I am."

"No one is smarter than you are mother, especially when it comes to computers. I have watched you work on them all these years, and what you do on them is absolute magic."

"Thank you, but I was there, when four little kids nearly started the third world war."

"I hope you burned that disc."

"No, I still have it. If the Russians piss me off, I'm going to scare the shit out of them, because I upgraded it."

"Now I'm sure you're out of your mind mom."

"When the Russians find out that we have Six Cloaked 7000 Gigawatt Lasers in permanent orbit over the North Atlantic, and Four over the North Pacific, they are going to shit a brick."

"Mom, you are some piece of work."

"Just think baby, your father has put up with me, all the time."

"Dad must be a saint."

"Don't you ever tell him I said this, but he is the only man on this planet that can put up with me."

"Thank you dear. That was the nicest thing you have ever said about me."

"Get out of this house before I kill you Steph. You weren't supposed to hear that."

"Why not; I heard about the Russians. Now get out of your clothes, and into bed. I'm going to fuck you senseless."

"Anna, your father just made me an offer I can't refuse. I'll talk to you after I speak to Jemma. Goodbye now."

"Enjoy getting laid mom. It will relax you. Goodbye."

***************

"Did you hear the part about your son, Steph?"

"Please tell me he didn't get fired."

"No it's more evil than that."

"As long as he didn't get fired, I don't care."

"Anna and I believe he is screwing Sandy and Cindy Hastings."

"Good for him, now get to bed."

"Men, you are all a pigs."

"Yes dear, let me get rid of these panties for you. I've been practicing linguistics all the way home. I want you to tell me if I should start here like this, or here, like this, or here...."

"Oh, that is so nice, you handsome bastard. I've only been talking to Anna for 40 minutes, and she took up most of that time. I don't stand a chance."

"Then shut the fuck up, and enjoy yourself."

"I love when you think you have won."

"Ouch, you bastard, that hurt."

"I believe I told you to shut up Patti."

"Fuck you Steph."

"I will, when I'm good and ready."

"Animal."

"Turn over, and I'll remind you how much of an animal I am."

"No Steff, I don't want to scream in front of all these people."

"You're going to scream anyway my dear, get use to it."

"Show off."

************************

121. Skiing in May

Lucius walked into Dan's office with a slight limp.

"How are you doing?" 

"According to Joe, I'm much better than I should feel. He wants me to stay off of it, but that's nonsense. I've gone into battle feeling worse than this. Did he tell you he wants to clone me?"

"Did he tell you what I told him in response?"

"Yes, he told me his life expectancy had been minimized. I'm here to talk to you about him. I owe him a big favor, and I'm going to repay it. I'm going out of town for about a week. What I have to set up is very complicated, because I promised him I would not kill his wife. My way would have been quick and easy. His way is going to be a bitch, and it is going to involve a lot of people. This trip is basically a sightseeing trip to get the lay of the land. If something presents itself, we will take advantage of it. If not, it was not our prime purpose anyhow.

This is part one. I give you my word this is a nonlethal action. It will take place in Montpelier Vermont."

"How many parts of this plan are there?"

"There will be four or possibly as many as five. As I said Joe wants no one killed, so we must be very careful."

"Keep to that plan Lucius. We have nothing pressing here. You have 10 days before you have to be back."

"Thank you sir that will be more than enough time for what I have planned."

"One more thing before you leave, Lucius. It was part of the discussion we were having, while they were operating on Margaret. You said, "If Margaret dies, and they don't sentence this guy to death, I have more than enough money to raise an army to break him out of prison, and put him to death my way."

Lucius, how much money do you have? I know you said William has you invested all around the world, but what does that mean in dollars?"

"That's one question I never thought you would ask me Dan."

"I never would have if you hadn't made that statement about breaking the guy out of prison. I know you would have done anything for Margaret, to avenge her death. Was it you who took that shot?"

"You know me better than that Dan. I had men all around the area, waiting to follow him to his home. I wanted him alive, not dead."

"That's what I thought. Are you going to answer my question, or not."

"In the area of $650."

"$650,000 thousand dollars?"

"No Dan, $650 million dollars."

"$650 million dollars. What the fuck are you still doing here Lucius? Why do you do this day after day? Why do you put up with me, and all the other bullshit that goes on around here?"

"It's really very simple Danny. This is the only thing in the world I love doing. The day I lie down on a beach, holding a drink with an umbrella in it, is the day I'm going to die."

"I put a bullet a quarter of an inch above your head Lucius, and you didn't flinch. You don't have an heir. You live frugally. Who the hell is going to get that money, when you kick the bucket?"

"I have two ex-wives that I'm still friendly with, and I have made some very good friends along the way, while I have been the service, and in civilian life. After they are taken care of, every Army organization you can think of, starting with the Academy is in my will. The biggest chunk is going to Wounded Veterans associations for both the mentally and physically disabled. Think about it Danny, how much money do we really need to live on, if you are single, and at our age. If guys like us have an income of $75,000, $100,000 a year, we are in pigs' heaven.

You also have to remember; you are the guy that made me rich. You got me kicked out of the Army, when William was looking for close body protection. All that publicity led him to me."

"You always were a lucky son of a bitch."

"Would you like $50 million to tide you over?"

"What the heck would I do with it?"

"It's the same question I ask myself every morning. I'll write you a check, and let you decide."

********************

Lucius called a friend, who always enjoyed hearing from him.

"Hello ma'am, this is Colonel Lucius Canyon of the 2191 missile Battalion in Black Hills North Dakota. I need to speak with Colonel Jack Daniels immediately please?"

"My father is babysitting for me. I'm about to leave the house for my afternoon card game with the girls. Is this important?"

"Ma'am I have 36 Minuteman missiles that I can't get off the ground, because my command bunker collapsed. We tried to find an engineer who could do the work we need, under the strictest security measures this country has. It went all the way up the line to the President. The President told the Chiefs of Staff to go through every engineer, who had been in the military in the last 20 years, who was qualified under those conditions. General Schwarzkopf remembered how pivotal Colonel Daniels work was for him during Desert Storm. I was told to contact him immediately.

Now, if the Colonel is at home, I need to speak to him yesterday. If he is at home, and you are keeping him from speaking to me, you could be in violation of the National Security Act. You can wind up in jail, for in excess of 20 years, if you refuse to cooperate. If he is not at home, tell me how to contact him immediately. If Colonel Daniels is at home, move your ass, before I call the 'Military Police', and have you arrested for obstruction to cooperate in a National Security Emergency."

Jack Daniels was basically locked in a room, babysitting for his three grandchildren, when his daughter, Gretchen, threw open the door. 

Dancing from toe to toe, she said, "Dad, there is Colonel from a rocket place in North Dakota. They can't shoot their missiles, unless you talk to him now." She threw him the phone, ran to the bathroom, and slammed the door.

"This is Colonel Daniels, to who may speaking?"

"Hello Jack, Lucius, would you like to stop babysitting for a while?"

"Lucius, what the fuck did you do to my daughter. You scared the piss out of her, figuratively, and literally."

"I'll tell you about that later. Act as if you have to rush like hell. Tell her a jet will meet you at the Memphis airport. They are taking you to the Black Hills on a secret mission. You don't know how long you'll be gone, but it could be six months or longer. I know it pains you to hear this, doesn't it?"

"It goes straight to my heart Lucius; straight to my heart. I'll be at the airport in an hour."

Jack ran to his bedroom, and started throwing his clothes into a large suitcase. His daughter joined him soon afterwards. 

He turned, and hugged her. "Gretchen, honey, this is top secret stuff. The Colonel said it would be a minimum of six months, maybe even longer. I won't be able to call you for a while. Just know that I will be safe, because they have more than 300 guards guarding one missile silo. They don't know why their communications building collapsed, but they are looking into the possibility that someone may have tunneled underneath it. That's why they need me. Deposit my checks, and use the money like yours. I won't need money where I'm going. Security will be so tight everything will be brought in by truck convoy or by air. Take care of the kids, and as soon as I get clearance, I'll give you a call. Be strong honey, I know you have that inner strength to do it. This country's defense depends on me getting this job done quickly and properly. I love you baby, and I'll be thinking of you every day."

Gretchen started to tear up. It seemed the older her father got; the more the country needed him for his expertise. He must be one of the best military engineers there ever was. They kept calling him out of retirement, and back into active duty, when something extraordinary needed to be done. She was so proud of him, proud he was her father, but she could never tell anyone why he went away for such extended periods of time on secret military missions.

***********

The Grumman Gulfstream 550 landed at the Memphis airport and taxied to the general aviation facility. Colonel Jack Daniels walked out to the big white bird, and Lucius was at the stairway to greet him.

"God bless you Lucius; I love my daughter, and my grandkids, but you can only take so much of them on a daily basis."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



"That was the best thing that happened to my marriages Jack, not one of them ended with a child. I wouldn't have minded, and neither would my wives, but I would have hated the thought of leaving a kid in a broken home."

"I keep wondering why Gretchen doesn't go out and try again. She is still a good-looking woman, in her late 30s, but her only contact in the outside world seems to be other women."

"Maybe she switched to the other team?"

"It's always a possibility, but I don't think so."

Let's get inside, I'll introduce you to the rest of the team, and tell you what my plan is, and see if you can make it better."

After the introductions were made, they waited for the aircraft to take off and head for Burlington, about 40 miles west of Montpelier, the capital of Vermont.

"All right people, this is a non-lethal assignment. I owe this as a personal favor to Doctor Joe Finch for saving Margaret Post. With the equipment they had in Temple, there was no way for them to see her heart problem. It was discovered too late in Austin for them to do anything about it. That is why we lost her."

This is a challenging project, so listen up. The subject is a woman named Sandra Finch. She goes by Sandy, the Doctor's former wife. She divorced him, and took him for everything he had, including his children. He never did anything wrong. I checked to verify his story. The doctor's he worked with called him 'Mister Clean', because he never messed around. The nurses said the same thing about him. He was either at work, or at home. 

His daughters are 9 and 11, and if they agree, the three of them will become passengers on the spacecraft. If not, we still have a vacancy for a Doctor.

I am going to give you my thoughts on this subject, and then we can discuss it, change it, make it better, or disregarded totally. We have to do this 3 times over a short period of time. Remember, these are my ideas. You can rip them apart; change any part of them where you see a hole in it, and do anything to them that will make any portion better."

"Rory, Lucy is going shopping again. Try to keep your mouth closed this time."

"Are we going to be married, sharing a room, with a single bed?"

"I would break it in half before it touched me."

"Do you see what I mean Colonel; she can't wait to hold it in her hands."

"You two can start doing push-ups, or you can listen to me. It's your choice?"

The banter stopped.

As he went through the plan, it seemed everything depended Sandy's Mercedes.

Paul said, "Sir, do we have access to a lot of cash?"

"Why do you ask Paul?"

"If it's a relatively new Mercedes, we are going to need a 'Singer' to get into it."

"You've got me Paul, what is a 'Singer'?"

"That's what they called it in San Diego. It's a device that goes through all the unlocking/locking codes of expensive automobiles. Some of the new cars use digital technology that can run up to 1 million digits before it opens. You can't do it manually, but it takes forever. These 'Singers' are quick, but they are very expensive."

"Define very expensive for me Paul?"

"They can go for between 10 and 20 grand."

"Where do you get one of these things?"

"There are several ways, but getting one from your local neighborhood Mercedes dealer is best. The problem there is they want to see your car, or registration for the vehicle; that's where the money comes in."

"Take out the case underneath the computer console please."

Paul pulled out the case, and Lucius opened it. There was nearly $500,000 in $100 bills inside it. He handed each member of the team $10,000, but he handed Lucy $20,000.

Rory said, "Why is she getting more money than we are?"

Lucius looked at him, and Rory said, "Never mind."

"Don't flash this money around. It is much more than we will need on this trip, but I don't want any of you to be caught short. I don't want any of you to use plastic either. Jack; you are going to be renting a six wheeled work truck with an open back. Rent 10 sawhorses, with road closed imprinted on them, and orange flashers. Buy two sets of good socket wrenches, and two really good shovels. We may have to bury Rory when this is over, because of erections that lasted more than a week."

Lucy laughed.

Rory didn't."

"Lucille, I want you to buy an expensive suit for Rory. Then add a few jackets, slacks, shirts, socks, and shoes. I've seen his taste in clothes; so please take care of that for me."

"She's not my mother."

"Which one of you was drooling, when we were flying from Lima to Austin?"

"I don't know sir. I was waiting for that plastic wrap to melt."

"It was not plastic, it was leather."

"You should've seen it, Jack. There amount of leather they used on that dress, was so little, the cow didn't realize it was missing."

"That was not funny Rory."

Paul said, "Jack in any non-Latin country she would've been arrested for indecent exposure. We were in Peru, and there were women prancing around in dresses shorter than she was wearing. The only thing Rory didn't do was lie down on the floor to see if she was wearing anything underneath that dress. If he did, Lucy would have stomped on him, before she shot him."

"Lucy as soon as you get him squared away, you can start your shopping. Three nights as a woman on the prowl, and one night with your husband, who works in New York City, for a Private Equity Firm. I will take care of getting your admittance into the club."

"Yes sir, and you know how much I hate shopping."

"Remember all these clothes go to a charity of my choice, when we are finished."

"Please sir, don't do that to me."

"If you want to take the price of the clothing off of your income from this operation you can keep them. Just remember the clothes have got to be top-of-the-line."

"Yes sir, I know."

"Prepare for landing."

"Pick up every scrap of paper. I don't want one thing left on this airplane that would indicate we were here. Take the waste paper bags with us. We will dispose of them, when we get to the lounge."

************************

According to Doctor Finch, living in Montpelier is like living in the book, "A Tale of Two Cities."

"The blue-collar, and middle-class lived on the east side of the Winooski River.

THE CORPORATE ELITE, and THE WEALTHY BY NAME, lived on the west side of the Winooski River.

There were no through roads or highways on the west side of the Winooski River. Therefore, there was no call for any undue traffic from the blue-collar side of the river to be on the WHITE COLLAR SIDE, unless they were on a service call.

The rich and powerful looked upon the Winooski River as their personal 'Moat.' It kept their underlings on their side of the river where they belonged, in their crowded cottages, with their unkempt children.

However, there was one worm in that perfect apple, one thorn in the side of the rich and privileged: The Montpelier Public Golf Course. It is on the west side of the Winooski River. Groups from the west side of the river offered exorbitant sums of money for that piece of real estate, the people on the east side of the Winooski River would not allow the city fathers to sell it to the residents on the west side of the river. 

One offer would have paid the city's entire budget for one year. The vote was put out for a public referendum. Of the 8027 Montpelier residents, 3629 were registered voters. 

When the vote was tabulated, 3266 residents voted: 831 voted for the sale of the golf course. 2435 voted against the sale of the golf course. The Registrar of Voters announced that there were 824 registered voters west of the Winooski River, letting everyone wonder which seven members from the east side of their community voted for the sale."

****************

The 'Members Only' Barré Country Club/Nightclub, is on the east side of the Winooski River. The main drawback for 'THE RICH AND PRIVILELED PEOPLE' WAS THE 42-MILE DRIVE TO GET THERE, AND THEN RETURN HOME. The drive was mainly on a one lane, which is tilted outward from the center for drainage during the winter season. It challenges the best drivers on their best days, to stay focused on their driving, and it forces normal drivers to reduce their speeds to below the posted limit as a safety precaution.

When you are driving through this area during the daytime, the scenery is glorious. In spring, the trees blossom with their new leaves. They burst forth from winter's grip, and bring bright green leaves back to the forests. As the leaves drink in the summer sun, they turn heavy with the elements of new life, and their green deepens to Emerald. At the first burst of a cool northwest wind, autumn's finest show begins. The leaves turn into bright oranges, gold's, reds, yellows, and blues. Only Mother Nature can put on a show like this, and she outdoes herself every year. 

For trees, this is the cycle of life, death, and renewal. However, for drivers, an oncoming car is not your only adversary. A moose, bear, or deer crossing the road will cause you serious harm just as seriously as the car coming at you. 

In Montpelier, this is 'Main Street.' On maps, it is designated as US 2.

As we looked down a stretch of it, Jack said to me, "We don't have to stage an accident here, this piece of road is an accident waiting to happen."

"Wonderful news Jack, we will save this one for last. It's the most highly traveled, and we want her kids in the car with her for that one.

***************

Dan Morgan received a call from his bank. He knew he couldn't be overdrawn, because it was connected to his savings account. They said he was being connected to the investment banking area and he could not understand why they would bother with him, because there was not enough money in his accounts to warrant it.

"General Morgan, this is Jaclyn Smith. I am the vice president and general manager of investments of the Southern region of Wells Fargo Corporate Trust Division. I would like to meet you at your convenience to discuss moving some of your assets out of your general banking accounts and into a more growth oriented position. What would be a good time for you?"

"Miss Smith, are you talking to the right Daniel Morgan?"

"I'm sure I am. You put a deposit into your accounts of $50 million yesterday, and that amount is not covered under the FDIC."

Dan yelled, "I am going to kill that dumb son of a bitch."

"What dumb son of a bitch would that be general?"

"That bastard told me he was going to do it. He has cost me more aggravation during my military career than I know what to do with. He is getting even with me for getting him kicked out of the Army."

"Don't you think it's a strange way for him to get even with you?"

"You have no idea how strange this man is Ms. Smith. If I sent this money back to him, he would send me $100 million next week. There is no way to win with him, and believe me Ms. Smith I've tried. What is a good day for you to travel here to Temple?"

"Would Thursday be convenient?"

"I can clear my calendar from noon on."

"That will be wonderful. My associate, Mister David Doyle, will be driving down from Dallas with me."

"I will inform security the two of you are coming."

"We will see you around noon on Thursday general."

"Goodbye Miss Smith."

*****************

"Alyssa, get Jayden on the phone."

"Morning General, is there going to be another drill?"

"No I have something better for you to do. First, Thursday around noon I am expecting two guests: Jaclyn Smith, and David Doyle, from some bank in Dallas. Second, as soon as Colonel Canyon comes back from his assignment, I want the senior agent on property to put a bullet through his ear."

Jayden laughed. "What did the good Colonel do to you this time Sir?"

"He put $50 million into my bank account."

"I'm sorry sir, would you repeat that."

"That bastard put $50 million into my bank account."

"He put $50 million into your bank account, and you want to kill him?"

"Since when did you become hard of hearing Jayden?"

"Are you worried about the taxes sir?"

"No, I'm tired of him being a pain in my ass."

"With all due respect sir, if it wasn't for the Colonel you would have three people remaining in your security department. The rest of us would have quit."

"Why would everyone have quit?"

"With all due respect sir, you are the biggest pain in the ass we have worked for."

"I am not a pain in the ass. I am an efficient senior officer."

"Sir, we all miss Margaret, and I would not bandy her name around just for the sake of conversation, but she always used to say that you were the biggest pain in the ass she ever knew."

"She was talking about our love life."

"No sir, she differentiated between the two. When she was talking about your lack of a love life, she called you a real prick. When she talked about your command style, she called you a pain in the ass."

Dan looked up into the air. "I'm not finished with you Margaret. You wait; when I get there I'm going to give you what for, and an awful lot more."

Jayden said, "General, if you keep talking about killing people, you are never going to see Margaret again."

"Jayden, you are ruining my day."

"I'm only trying to help out general."

Dan slammed down the phone, and growled.

He looked at her ashes, sitting on the shelf. "Margaret, I have a mind to flush you down the toilet."

Out of nowhere, a blinding bolt of lightning struck the building by his office window, followed by a roar of thunder loud enough to deafen in elephant.

Dan ducked for cover in the far corner of his office. He thought he was under attack by a rocket-propelled grenade.

His secretary knocked on the door, opened it, and walked in.

"General, are you hiding?"

"Get down Alyssa, the building is under attack, didn't you hear the explosion?"

"I'm sorry general, but everything's been quiet. Do you want me to check with security?"

"Yes, call the switchboard. See if there any reports of suspicious activity on either of the properties."

Alyssa picked up the general's phone and asked the switchboard operator the questions.

The operator said, "Everything is too quiet; the guards have been doubled just in case."

Alyssa relayed that information to the general, and he felt as foolish as a plebe at West Point. He stood up and asked Alyssa what she wanted when she walked into his office.

Alyssa said, "I came in here to see if you had anything for me to do. I am so far ahead on all the paperwork that needs to be done, I'm sitting out there twiddling my thumbs. What did Margaret do on days like today?"

"It always seemed that Lucius would walk in the door, and Margaret and he would have a great deal of fun at my expense. If that didn't happen, Margaret would call my sister, and they would talk for hours."

"Sir, I don't know your sister. I'm going shopping. If you need me, call me on my cell."

"Okay Alyssa, just don't go to Austin to shop."

Dan thought, "When did I start losing control of this place?"

Margaret whispered, "You never had control of this place. I did, with Lucius help. All you did was sign the papers I drew up for you, just as you did when you were a shiny new Lieutenant."

Dan held his head in his hands and said, "I'm sorry Margaret, I'm sorry for everything."

***********

"Lucius, this is Clark. Sandy just left the Country Club alone and the top is down. I'm right behind her."

"Okay Jack, let us know if she takes the turn on Clark Road."

"Shit, she took the turn on Clark, and nailed the pedal to the floor. She has to be doing over 100 miles an hour already."

"Close the road, and put the warning sign back up. Then check in with me, and I'll tell you if we need your help or not."

"You got it Lucius."

***************

Sandra Finch had taken this road hundreds of times. She knew it like the back of her hand. She was doing 130 miles an hour in her SL 550 Roadster, waiting for the sign that would tell her to slow down for the upcoming turn.

She had a wonderful time this evening. She met two very eligible bachelors. Steve Austin was a Senior Vice President with Hartford Insurance, who did not meet the standard insurance executive profile. He was polite, and he was funny as hell. Unfortunately, for him, Sandra had not gone to bed with any man since she got in her divorce. She still loved her husband, Joseph, and she could not get that out of her head.

Benjamin was a little pushy. He apologized when he got her on the dance floor.

He said, "That other guy was monopolizing you, and I did not see a ring on your finger or his. I took a chance and hoped both of you were single. I wanted to hold you in my arms and get to know you. You are an extremely beautiful woman, and I would have done anything short of starting a fight to hold your body against mine. How many children do you have, one, or two?"

"How do you know I have children?"

"A woman can do a lot of things to her body, but she cannot hide the results of the pregnancy. You have tried extremely hard to conceal it by exercising, and you look absolutely phenomenal. I am a pediatrician, and I have seen what pregnancies do to the muscles of a woman's body after a pregnancy. I would put you in the top 1/10th of one percent."

"Why thank you Doctor. Where is your practice?"

"It's in a really terrible area. My grandmother left me her home in her will. It was a real fixer-upper. I could walk five blocks north to Massachusetts General Hospital, and one block south I am in Beacon Hill.

He smiled, "It is really a terrible location."

"Yes, it does sound dreadful."

"Sandra, if you'd like I can give you a personalized tour of my home and office. You have no idea how much I'd love to get your body on one of my examining tables. You have never felt hands as soft and gentle as mine." 

"I hate to tell you this Benjamin, my former husband was a plastic surgeon. I have never felt hands on my body like his."

"Why did you divorce him?"

"In order to pay off his student loans we went to this place in Texas that was underserved. My parents didn't like me being so far from home, and not being able to see their grandchildren. 

Finally, they said, "If you don't come home we are going to write you out of our Will, leave everything to your sister, and nothing to your children." 

I didn't care about me, but I did care about my kids. I also cared about who they were going to give the money to, my sister. If they gave to charity that would've been fine with me. However, they knew exactly where to hit me. They had not talked to my sister in nearly seven years, because of what she tried to do to my daughters. I was given no choice, and said 'Okay.' 

They hired a lawyer, and he took Joseph apart. I got everything he ever had, plus our children."

"That's what lawyers are paid to do."

"Yeah, I guess, but the look on Joseph's face, when we left the courtroom, still haunts me."

**************

As she came out of her daydream, her high beams picked up the beginning of the turn.

"Oh shit." She slammed on the brakes, and tried to make it into the turn. She began to think she might make it, when she saw a car, with its lights on, stopped on the siding of the road. It was the last thing she saw as her airbag exploded into her face, the front of her car crumbled, and her seatbelt retracted holding her in place. She was barely conscious, and thought she smelled something being pressed against her nose and mouth, as she went into a deep dark sleep.

"Jack put up the sign."

"Roger that."

"Rory let's get the mixture into her."

"Lucy, bring us the towels please."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



"No problem boss."

"What a shame Colonel. $12,000 for a 'Singer,' and she drives with her top-down."

"Do you see any broken glass Paul?"

"No sir."

"What would we be doing now if we didn't have the 'Singer'?"

"One day Colonel, I am going to learn to keep my mouth shut."

"Do you realize the day you learn to do that, will be the day I stop having fun."

"Open wide Sandra, we have to put the mouthpiece in. Good girl, now, let's do it just the way we agreed, one-quarter ounce at a time. Before we start, give her more chloroform Paul."

Sandra fought the procedure. However, 30 minutes later, she had four ounces of alcohol, and 20 milligrams of Valium running through her veins.

When they were finished with Sandra, Rory and Lucy were told to get into the Lincoln, and put the blood where they had practiced.

Lucy said, "I am not going to do it with him watching me."

As soon as she finished her sentence, Lucius started walking towards her, with a look on his face she had never seen.

"I'll do it Colonel. Don't worry about me, sir. I'll take care of it right away."

"Lucille, I never had a doubt in my mind that you would follow orders."

"That's what orders are for sir, to be followed to the T."

"Then get in the fucking car, and do it!"

Lucille's pants were on the ground, before she entered the Lincoln.

"Jack secure the sawhorses, we are ready to leave."

As soon as Jack Daniels completed his tasks, he spotted two sports cars making the turn onto Clark Road.

"Lucius get out of there in a hurry. You have two speedsters coming your way."

"Thanks Jack, we are gone. Go to the hotel."

"I'm on my way."

Paul started the car, as Lucius ran over to tell Rory and Lucy that company was on its way. As soon as he finished warning them, he hopped in the rental car. Paul turned north on Country Club Road and cleared the area.

The damage to the Lincoln, caused by Sandra's car, was exactly as Jack had predicted, and drawn up for them at the hotel. Sandra hit the car just behind the rear axle, pushing it forward, and causing it to turn 90 degrees onto the roadway. 

What happened next was not part of the plan.

The two speedsters Jack saw taking Clark Road southbound, were sons of high-ranking, very wealthy members of the Country Club. They did what they wanted, whenever they wanted to do it, without fear of reprisal.

As they raced side-by-side down the road, they whizzed by the warning sign, about the upcoming turn ahead. They were still doing over 100 miles an hour.

Rory heard the cars approaching as they down shifted into the turn. Instinctively, he knew they were in trouble. He grabbed Lucy by the neck and pulled her down across the front seat.

Lucy yelled, "What the..."

"Stay down; we're going to get hit."

Rory threw his body on top of hers, as the two roadsters made it into the turn, uncontrolled. Neither one of them had a chance to stop, before meeting the obstructions. 

The Corvette, in the inside lane, slid onto the gravel siding, and was attempting to steer back to the road, when the driver saw the accident vehicles in front of him. It was too late to do anything else as the body of his car started to disintegrate. Its automatic safety protocols engaged microseconds afterwards, and soon the driver heard,

"This is 'On-Star.' Our sensors show your car has been in an accident. Do you require assistance?"

"Yes, there is a four car accident. It looks like we are going to need a lot of help. Please call my parents, and tell them I'm injured, but I'm okay."

"I will take care of it Melvin."

"Thank you, the people in the Lincoln are probably dead. They got hit twice."

"Please don't say anything else, this is a recorded line."

"Thank you ma'am."

"Hang on Mister Gibson, help is on the way." 

The driver of the Jaguar was luckier, for the next few seconds anyway. He was able to maintain control of his car, as it was able to move into the right lane, and keep its tires on the asphalt portion of the road, as he continued to downshift. As his eyes adjusted from the attempt not to hit his friends' car, he saw this black obstruction ahead of him. He realized, too late, it was the side of another vehicle. He hit the steel pillar of the Lincoln that gave the inside cabin of that car its main source of protection from a side impact collision.

Everyone called these older model Lincoln's 'TANKS', and when his Jaguar hit it, the Lincoln's reputation remained untarnished.

The sloped, aerodynamic hood of the Jaguar tried to slide underneath the steel bars that held the weight of this mammoth beast. Instead of crumpling, as it is designed to do, against modern cars, it tried to lift the Lincoln off the ground. As it reached the middle of the hood, the Jaguar's engine block broke in half, under the strain carrying the nearly 3 ton beast, and fell to the ground. The car shuddered, and stopped, under the weight of American made steel.

The driver looked at the Lincoln, sitting halfway up the hood of his car, and said, "I'm getting too old for this shit."

His next thought was for his friend. As he tried to extricate himself from his car, he realized his feet were stuck under the brake and shift pedals. His ankles weren't broken, because he was not pain. He was just stuck where he was.

He pushed the automatic dial on his car's steering column to see how his friend was, and amazingly, it worked.

When Mel answered the phone, he said, "Hi mom."

Danny laughed. "How many times do I have to tell you I'm not your fucking mother? Your father maybe, but not your mother."

"Are you all right?"

"That depends on your definition of alright? I can't move my feet. I believe they are trapped, but not broken. Everything else feels fine. How are you?"

"I think I'm okay. I'm a little fuzzy. I'm not going to move until the EMTs get here. OnStar called me and the troops are on their way here."

"That's a cute little toy you have there, my son."

"Thanks dad."

************

"Are you okay Lucy?"

"I don't think so. Something hurts inside. How the hell did you know?"

"I'll tell you about that later. I have to call the Colonel."

************

"Yes."

"Sir, we have a complication. Two more cars came around the corner. One hit the subject, while the other one broadsided us. Lucy may be hurt."

"Hang on, were on our way back."

*********

Rory was argumentative at first, but cooperative when they began questioning him as to what happened.

"I'll tell you what happened after you take care of my wife. She is newly pregnant and she is hurting badly. We have waited a long time for us to become pregnant. Our great uncle is going to give us a great deal of money when our baby is born. If anything happens to this child, he will move heaven and earth to see that person, or entity is prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, and possibly further."

"What is your uncle's name?"

"My uncle's name is William Zabo."

"I'm sorry I don't know anyone by that name."

"You can ask anyone, who lives on the west side of the river who he is; they will know. Now take care my wife."

"I have to make a call first."

************

"May I speak to Mister Jefferson please?"

"Hello?"

"George, this is Archie. I have three from the west side that are hurt, and in need of transport to the hospital. I have two visitors that also need transport to the hospital. The man tells me the wife is newly pregnant, and if anything happens to that child, his uncle will move heaven and earth to make sure anyone involved in this will pay heavily for it. What do you want me to do?"

"Tell them to go fuck themselves, no one can hurt us. They will go last."

"Thank you George that's what I thought."

"Did they give you this uncle's name?"

"Yes sir, they did. William Zabo."

"William Zabo!"

"That's what he said George."

"They go first. I want our best Doctors checking them both over. I want every item documented on all individuals concerned, and I want them notarized. If anyone fucks up, their jobs are forfeit. Do you understand me Archie?"

"I will supervise everything, and get you a copy of everything, under seal. The district attorney will be called in on this immediately. You can count on me being completely thorough on this one. Just out of curiosity, who is this guy?"

"I'll put it to you this way Archie; he's rich enough to buy the entire northeast portion of the United States, without touching the principle on any of his accounts."

"I guess were talking about seriously rich. I better get to work. I'll talk to you soon George."

*************

Sandra Finch was just coming out of her drug-induced coma as the police, and fire rescue units started appearing on the scene. Her speech was slurred, and disconnected. It was initially thought she had a brain injury. She was put into a neck collar, and taken away by ambulance. By the time she got to the hospital, the 'ORDERS' were already in place. Everyone's work would be checked and double-checked for accuracy, and then notarized.

At the hospital, she was totally uncoordinated. Her voice was slurred, and she could not perform a simple task. She was known in the community, and volunteered at many outreach programs for the elderly and infirm.

When they drew Sandra's blood, it registered at .2167. At any other time, the technician would have discarded the first number, inserted a zero, and written it down on his log sheet. Today was a different. He printed out the first result, cleaned the machine thoroughly, and ran the test a second time. The result was identical. He called his supervisor and showed him the results of the two tests.

His supervisor said, "Run it again, while I watch you."

"Yes sir. The technician cleaned the machine, thoroughly, for the second time. Inserted the sample and waited for the results. He was not surprised when number .2167 materialized for the third time."

The supervisor said, "Sign all three copies, and I will cosign them. Register them in your log, and I will sign off on that also. This woman is in big trouble."

When they were finished, the supervisor said, "We better run a full profile on all these people tonight, just to see what else is in their blood." 

"They didn't ask for that sir."

"Trust me, the District Attorney's Office will ask for it soon, very soon. I have no idea who this young man is related to, but I have never seen anyone on the west side of the river jump so high, and as fast as I have tonight."

The request came from the district attorney the following afternoon. It was returned to him within minutes. The only thing they found in this patient's system beside vodka, was the tranquilizer/depressant Valium.

***************

They were about to take Melvin Gibson out of his car, and transport him to the hospital, when Chief Bunker walked over and told the EMTs that Gibson would have to wait until another ambulance returned to the site. They were taking Mister and Mrs. Trevelyan to the hospital first, because she was in serious condition.

Melvin retorted, "I don't care if she has a fucking pole up her ass. She does not live here, and she does not live on the west side of the river as I do. I'm going to have my father fire your ass, unless you get me to the hospital first."

"Sonny, if anything happens to that young woman, your father may not have a pot to piss in. If she loses the baby she's carrying inside her, that young man's uncle has enough power to bulldoze the entire west side of the river, and make it into a parking lot. If I were you, I would shut the fuck up, and go with the program."

No one who lived on the east side of the river had ever spoken to him in that manner before. If the chief had the balls to do it to him, while he was sitting in a wrecked car, whoever those two people were, in the Lincoln, had some very powerful friends, in very high places. He decided to back down, and speak with his parents later.

The driver of the Jaguar, Daniel Glover, had high amounts of THC, which indicated he had recently smoked marijuana or ingested marijuana oil. Normally it would be swept under the rug, but not this time. This time it would show up on his adult record, and either he would plead no contest and be found guilty, plead guilty, or plead not guilty and face trial. It would be very interesting to see how the people on the east side of the river would treat a resident of the west side in a court of law. It had never happened before.

**************

As they were driving down Country Club Road Paul said, "Colonel, there is an awful lot of activity down there."

"Pull off to the side and let's see if I can get in contact with Rory."

"This is the Colonel. The emergency beacon on your phone went off. May we help you sir?"

"No Colonel, thank my Uncle William for his concern. The police have finally started acting on my request to take care of Lucy. She is not doing well. I am concerned for the baby. Lucy is bleeding vaginally. She is going to be distraught if she loses our child. I will call you in case we need an aircraft to take us home. Hang on a second Colonel."

"Chief, I know your first name is Archie, what do I tell my uncle your last name is?"

"Bunker, Archibald Bunker."

"Colonel, you can tell my Uncle William that the police chief's name is Archibald Bunker. He helped us a great deal tonight, by cutting through all the red tape, and getting Lucy to the hospital in front of all the high-powered locals that caused this accident. The only thing I can suggest is to get one of our lawyers up here, before they have a chance to change the records to suit their purpose. 

I will call you if anything major happens. Good night Colonel."

As he closed his cell phone, the chief said, "Rory, there is no chance the records will be changed. They are being checked, reviewed, and notarized on the spot. As important as this case is to you, it is to us as a city, and as a people. I give you my word on that."

"Thank you very much chief, that makes me feel much better. Knowing that you were going to treat this case on an equal, unbiased, basis, is very important to us."

"That's a very odd statement Rory. Most people want the police to take one side or the other."

"Yes chief, I know. All my wife and I want is justice. If we can get that, we will be very satisfied."

***********

"Chief, the DA is waiting so we can run the Trevelyan blood."

Archie said, "I'll be there one second."

Rory asked, "Can I come too?"

"No that is against the law, because it could be used against you in court."

"My lawyer will find out in discovery anyhow. My wife can't drink because she's pregnant. She won't take drugs, other than what the Doctor ordered for her, because we've been trying for 10 years to have a baby. She would no sooner harm our chances of having a baby than she would try to plow a 1000- acre plot of land by hand."

"I'll ask the DA, and if he approves, you can watch."

************

"Rory Trevelyan, this is our District Attorney El James."

"Hello sir, it is nice meeting you."

"Mister Trevelyan, if the tests come out poorly for you, in 10 minutes you won't like me very much."

"Mister James, I was the one who was driving. I was the one that got us lost, and I was trying to get us back to Interstate 89. I purchased a new GPS when we landed in Burlington, and had the guy in the store program it for me. I programmed the computer to tell it where I wanted to go. I got three green lights, and we followed the directions. I came down this same street, Clark Road three times, before I gave up on the computer and pulled over to the side as far as the gravel would let me, so we could look at the paper maps. I had all my lights on, including the lights inside the car. I was a third of the way from the next turn when the red car hit me. I don't know how long I was unconscious, but the first thing I did was check on Lucy. She was still unconscious, and bleeding from everywhere. I reached for my cell phone, when I realized all the lights in the car had just gone out. I was about to unbuckle my seatbelt, and reach across to open the glove box to take out the flashlight I purchased, when I heard cars down shifting from high-speed coming from behind us. I pulled Lucy across the bench seat, and put as much of my body as I could across hers. If one of us was going to live, I wanted it to be her, because she was carrying our child."

"Louis, run Mister Trevelyan's blood first."

A few moments later, the machine spit out the results.

"He's clean sir. No alcohol, barbiturates, or drugs of any kind are in his system. Do you want me to take pubic hair root samples? It will tell us if he had anything illegal in his system in the past 180 days."

"That won't be necessary Louis. We are only interested in what was in his system tonight. Let's do Mrs. Trevelyan now please."

Moments later the results printed out, and everyone, except Rory, poured over the results.

Archie asked, "Don't you want to see what the results are?"

"Archie, I know my wife. She wouldn't hurt that child if you put a gun to her head."

"Mister Trevelyan, you don't know your wife, as well as you think you do."

"I would stake my life on what I said to you before. Tell me where to stand chief, and if Lucy has alcohol or illegal drugs in her body, I will sign my life away, and you can shoot me here and now."

"Don't you wish all men loved their wives and trusted them as much as this man does?"

"It would put a lot of divorce lawyers out of business."

"Rory, she's clean. There is a high amount of Folic Acid, and iron in her system, but everything else looks normal."

"Can the test tell you how well the baby is doing?"

"I'd have to run a different blood panels to find that out."

"Would it also tell you if she has lost the baby because of this accident?"

"How far along is the baby?"

"We just found out about two weeks ago. The doctor said the baby is five weeks old."

"I'll be able to tell you if it's still viable, but the most accurate way is a vaginal ultrasound."

"Let's take things one at a time. Would you do what your machine does best, and give me the result."

"It's okay with me Mister Trevelyan, but who's going to pay for the test?"

Rory said, "I will. Anything that keeps my wife calm at a time like this is worth its weight in gold."

Louis ran the new test, which took a little longer than the others did. When it was finished, he didn't look at the result he just handed the paper to Rory and waited for his reaction. Three people in that room waited for his reaction and when it came, they were sure Lucy had lost the baby.

El James said, "Dammit man, say something."

"Guys, according to your test, she is still pregnant. Lucy will laugh herself silly. My uncle will be overjoyed. I can't wait to tell her." (This should be an interesting conversation.)

El said, "Let me see if they have her in a room, or if they're still doing tests."

The hospital had moved Lucy to the front of line. If Sharon was getting a CAT scan, Lucy was getting an MRI. In radiology, it was like musical chairs. When El called to find out where Lucy was, he was told she was having an EMG, and would be going for an ultrasound next."

"Come with me Rory, we can catch her between tests. You can give her the good news then."

"I don't want to tell her in a hallway, and I'd like to have flowers in my hand when I do."

"You are some piece of work Mister. There are many men like you around. If we hustle, we can get the flowers, and get to see her before her next test.

They got to radiology just as the technician was about to close the door to the Ultrasound Suite.

The district attorney introduced himself, and showed his badge. He said to the technician, "Let these two people use the room for a few minutes alone. Mister Trevelyan will open the door when you can go in."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



"Okay Mister James, I'll wait out here."

"Thanks El; I will try to keep her is calm as possible, but if you feel an earthquake, it will be because she is so happy."

"Go give her the good news, you don't need me around you anymore, I'm going back to work. I'm going to have a lot of it, because of this accident. However, I know that you didn't cause it. Take care."

Rory walked into the room, and found Lucy laying comfortably on the examination bed. As he pulled the chair closer to her he whispered, "I'm about to tell you something that you're probably not going to understand. However, you must act as if you are overjoyed, overjoyed to the 10th degree. Don't ask me why."

He sat down and handed her the bouquet of flowers, kissed her, and said, "Lucy darling, you are still pregnant. You held on to the baby. I cannot tell you how proud I am of you. You are the love of my life. I do not know what I did to deserve you." 

He kissed her again, placed his arms on either side of her, and whispered, "React you bitch!"

Lucy reacted alright. She started screaming and hollering, while beating Rory on the chest and head. He took it good-naturedly otherwise he would have killed her.

The technician was looking at them through the large window and so was the chief of police, Archie Bunker. They were both laughing, thinking that the outbreak of hysterics in the room was one of joy upon hearing that the baby was safe.

Rory grabbed Lucy's hands, brought them down to her chest, and asked her, "Is it mine?"

"I knew all men were dumb, but I didn't realize they were all stupid at the same time. We've been going out for three months. The only thing I want to know is how you beat my birth control pills."

"That doesn't bother me. I just want to know if you want to get married. I've told you often enough I love you. Do you love me enough to give me a chance?"

"Yes I do, but what is the Colonel going to say about us working together?"

"Who said anything about you working after this? You're not packing a gun and protecting other people, while you're carrying our child inside you."

There was a knock at the door, and the technician stuck her head in.

"I know this is a happy time for both of you, but I need to do her test because I have others coming up behind her."

"As long as I can have her back when you're finished, you can have her for two minutes."

"I'll see what I can do."

"I'll be outside dear if you need me."

"You better be; I want a milkshake, with pickles." Lucy held onto her flowers during the entire test.

Rory said, "Oh God, it's starting already."

As the technician was doing her work, she said, "Lucy would you like a picture of your little boy?"

"It's a boy? This machine can tell you it's a boy?"

"It's bigger than the Ultrasound Machines doctors have in their office, and it's also more powerful. I would say this little guy is two months old, with all 10 fingers, and all 10 toes. I'll print one out for you so you can see him. How solid is your husband's head?"

"Thicker than concrete."

"Good, then show him this in the hallway. It will save the hospital money on testing its strength."

"I enjoy the way you think."

The technician handed Lucy the picture, and all she could do was gape at it. All it looked like was gray on gray, but you could see the eyes, nose, fingers, toes, and the appendage that signified the sex. Lucy was happy she was lying down, and couldn't wait to see Rory's reaction.

The aide came in the room, assisted her onto the gurney, and rolled her into the hallway. He left her there, while he assisted the next patient into the room.

"Rory would you like to see our child?"

"They could see it already? How can they do that?"

"It's very simple. She stuck her head between my thighs and looked."

"Listen lady, don't start with me. I'll buy you a milkshake without pickles."

"Here, look at this."

Rory took the picture, and started turning it by its corners. Around and around the picture went, and Rory gave no indication he could see anything.

Lucy was getting to the point, where she was going to get off the gurney, and hit him, when Rory said, "I was just fooling around with you, lie down. She's going to be blonde just like her mother." His arms came up to protect his face immediately from flying flowers. Lucy was neither blonde, nor was their child a she.

He put his arms down, and asked for a truce. He leaned over the rail and kissed her, only to hear Paul say, "Dammit Colonel, it's not the money, but how do you always know?"

"Paul how many men do you know that come to work in the morning smelling of the same perfume as a particular woman, or their clothes reeking of the same fabric softener. 

Then there is always that old Shakespearean line that goes something like, "I think the woman doth protest too much." Every time she is close to him or has to do something with him, she always complains.

"How far along is she Rory?"

"We just found out, how did you know?"

"Tell them Paul."

"My dear Colonel not only bet me $2000 that you two were an item, but he gave me 5 to 1 odds that Lucy was pregnant. I couldn't pass that up. I figured I might lose the first half of the bet, but there was no way that Lucy would get knocked up. I now owe the Colonel $12,000."

"I owe half my wealth to my bets with Paul."

"So you had no idea Lucy was pregnant until I told you."

"Nope not a clue. However, you didn't answer my question, how far along is she?"

"She is eight weeks gone sir."

"Lucy, you are on desk duty from this point on."

"I hate your guts Rory."

"Colonel, Paul, you are invited to our wedding, as soon as we pick a date."

"That is the smartest thing you can do for your son. The son of a one parent home starts out life with a deficiency he can never overcome."

Lucy asked, "How did you know it's a boy?"

"Lucy, I can only be wrong 50 percent of the time."

"Colonel if I had my gun I would be tempted to shoot you."

"Let's get down to business. If anybody sees us talking, I'm looking for the Wheelers. They checked in about three hours ago. Lucy what's your status?"

"I have pain in my right side that will not go away, but other than that I am operational. No headaches, no dizziness, I can walk on my own without any problem. If I can get a hold of the x-rays, I could tell you what's wrong with me. I wouldn't be surprised if I got hurt when my future husband tried to cover me when the second pair of cars came our way."

Lucius said, "That was my fault, I should have had Jack close the road for at least 20 minutes after the initial accident. Sharon would not have been a problem if she woke up, but I never expected two more racecars coming down the same road moments after we left. I was caught bare-assed, without a fallback position. I won't make that mistake again."

"How could you know Colonel? It could've been two minutes later or two hours later, the result would've been the same. The police would've checked the heat of the engines, and both of them would have been ice cold. They would have figured out something was fishy sooner or later, and now the police are on our side."

"Explain that one to me Rory."

"They allowed me to go into the blood lab while they were testing my blood. I was with the Chief of Police, Archie Bunker, and the District Attorney, El James, and I played it up to the hilt, about the baby. After they finished testing my blood, and it came out super clean, they went to test Lucy's, and I told them I would sign a paper giving them the right to shoot me if they found anything in her blood that wasn't supposed to be there. Naturally, there wasn't, and then they ran two other tests, at my request, because I wanted to know if the baby made it through the accidents. I fully expected a negative readout, and I was prepared to cry. When they handed me the result, and it was positive, I was ready to cry. When I didn't say anything El yelled at me, "Dammit man, say something." 

I said, "According to your test she still pregnant and went into a song and dance about how happy everyone is going to be. All the while I was wondering how I was going to tell her she was pregnant and get her to be happy about it instead of wanting to kill me, because I was probably the father, and she was on the pill. It was a very interesting conundrum."

"Getting back to the police, the District Attorney and I are probably on a first name basis for ever at this point. He knows what we were doing in that particular position, why we were there, about the broken GPS, and everything we were doing that evening. Sharon won't be able to talk about any of it, unless she remembers coming around that turn. After saying our numbers, and running them against hers, we are going to have the upper hand in that accident. The other two adolescents that came around that turn afterwards, are up shit's creek also, because they came around it side by side, and there is no defense for that type of driving on a single lane road at that speed."

"Very good Rory, I want you two to set up residence here for at least the next two months. Lucy I want you to play up that injury on your right side, and pains in your legs. No neck or head pain, unless you really feel it. Any spinal discomfort, you get yourself back to the hospital immediately. 

Find the finest OB/GYN in town. Listen to his advice, and follow his instructions. 

Open an account in a bank, and advise them that a large deposit will be made to it from an out-of-state bank. They are to call you as soon as it comes so you can make the appropriate disbursements.

Do not buy a car. The insurance company on your last vehicle will pay you in full very shortly. One of William's attorneys will contact you to handle your court cases. Do not worry about your background checks. Both of you are Army brats, and you know how difficult it can be getting information out of the military, especially now, during times of congressional sequestration, when civilian support staff has been cut to the bone. For the time being, Lucy, you were born in Berlin. Rory, you were born at Subic Bay.

I'm going to leave this attaché case with you. It has $200,000 in it. When you go to the bank, put $150,000.00 in a money market, and $50,000 checking account. When the other deposit comes, instructions will come with it."

"Yes sir. Is there anyone in particular you want me to get in touch with here, or become friendly with?"

"When the deposit hits, your friendly banker will do that for you."

"Yes sir."

 

122. Confusion

"Doctor Thyme, this is William in the parts department. We just opened a couple of boxes with very confusing names on them, and no codes directing them to a specific construction area. I spoke to Doctor Luck about it and he told me to ship them back to the vendor. I wanted to check with you, because he has been out of contact with everyone for a long time due to his illness."

"What do the invoices say William?"

"Milli-Band Assembly: Boxes 1-8."

"Did you open any of them?"

"Yes Doctor, we opened box 1. Inside was a wiring guide and at least 600 feet of shielded wire with wiring bolts, and connectors. It told us nothing."

"Send them back William."

"Yes sir, I'll begin repackaging them immediately."

I said just loud enough for my son to hear, "Idiot."

"Did you say something dad?"

"Why did something slip out of my mouth?"

"You said the word idiot."

"I would never call you an idiot Gray, unless you were sending back your Millimeter Band Radar to the manufacturer, instead of installing it onto the Mickey Mouse ears of our spacecraft"

"I hate you dad. You let me walk right into that one with my eyes wide open."

"It was almost as good as the days where you were chasing Gordon all around the lab. I think you should call William and tell him to start unpacking those boxes and tell him where to put them."

"I have someplace for him to put them, but you might object."

"Son, after some of the things they've put up there, I wouldn't be surprised if those boxes fit. Just give them to Hannah, and she'll figure out a way to do it."

"Dad, you are insane, but the best father, and scientist I have ever known."

"Thank you Gray, I take a special joy hearing that coming from you. How is motor mouth coming along?"

"Which one dad: Delicious, Newton, or Teddy?"

"That's true; you do have a problem in that department now. Let's start at the top of the food chain, and work down. How is the big motor mouth doing?"

"Teddy is talking a blue streak. After she passed dada and mama there was nothing to stop her from talking. She is almost a year old, and she's talking in baby sentences. She tells Delicious when she has to go to the bathroom, and when she's hungry. It's hysterical, when she gets them confused. She'll run to the bathroom, while Delicious is walking towards the kitchen. By the time, Delicious gets to the kitchen, and realizes Teddy is in the bathroom trying to rip her diaper off. She still finds it easier to talk to Newton telepathically, rather than verbally, but he scolds her, and tells her she'll never learn to speak properly unless she uses the words out loud. She knows how to play checkers, and she's good at it. She watches Newton and I playing chess and understands it. I made a bad move a few weeks ago, and she shouted out, "Blunder!" I said thank you Teddy. She said, "You welcome." I wanted to kill her.

Newton is as happy as a clam, now that his mother and I are getting along. The three of us talk about what happened any time he wants, and sometimes when we see that unsettled look on his face, we ask him to join us in our conversations. He has led an idyllic life, being with like-minded children and family nearly all of it. He has never seen adults act like Delicious and I did. It's going to take him a little while to understand that these things happen, and why. I don't think the pediatric psychologist helped him that's why we decided to stop his visits. He's more comfortable with us, and talking with us, either one-on-one or together. He's a very bright boy, and we both love him very much. The best part about it is he knows it, and he's happy about it."

Delicious is out of her mind, in a very good way. She goes over and over the data from our first flight trying to find something that went wrong. She gets so angry when she can't find anything that went wrong. She looks at me and yells, "Something should have malfunctioned, but nothing did. That's not normal." I hide behind a wall and yell, "Neither are you." For the next few minutes, she'll chase me around the house, calling me all sorts of names, until I let her catch me. Then I'll throw her on the floor, and start kissing her until she surrenders. She's been surrendering a lot lately."

"Is that's why she smiling at work?"

"She is smiling at home too."

"Good work Gray, keep it up."

"It's not that hard to keep it up with your daughter around, dad."

"What are you two old men talking about?"

"Dad and I were talking about the days were I used beat the crap out of you at work."

"That's funny, I don't recall any of those days."

"Gordon, be good, or you will spend all night practicing with Monty, instead of playing with Zoie. I could arrange that for you if you want."

"When did you become so mean dad?"

"I think it was when you became smarter than I am."

"No one is smarter than you are dad. Everyone listens to you. Then they go off and use what they've learned from you, to invent something new using that knowledge. I've done it, so has Gray. Most of the scientists in this room have expanded our knowledge of the universe by listening and learning from you. All you have to do is look at the learning output for the time you weren't here. Even though everyone was working hard to pick up the slack left by your absence, the learning curve was down, even though our output was higher. There were no new patents filed while you were not here. Two months after you returned, we filed five new patents. That has to show you the confidence we all have in you."

"Do you see what I mean Gray? You can't even yank on his chain without getting a lecture on how good I am."

"Dad, when I yank on his chain, the only thing that happens is he goes into his monkey dance."

"It's not a monkey dance. It's a baboon showing indifference for an invader."

"Wait until I tell the baboons about that; they will be insulted."

"Let's go outside Gray, I've wanted to knock your head off for a long time."

"Wait one minute boys, I have to get you a referee."

I took out my cell phone and called our buildings operator.

"Hello, can you get Monty on the phone for me please, this is Doctor Luck."

Gordon yelled, "Dad, I'll do anything please don't tell her."

"What don't you want me to tell her Gordon? You don't want me to tell Monty that what she's been training you to use as a method of self-defense, you want to use to beat the crap out of Gray. Isn't that what you said you wanted to do?"

"I wasn't going to hurt him, too badly."

Moments later, He felt her presence behind him.

I asked, "What's wrong Gordon, do you have a frog in your throat?"

"No dad, shortly someone's going to have her hands around my throat, and begin squeezing until her fingers meet. Hello Monty, please don't kill me."

"Would you explain to me why I shouldn't kill you, you obnoxious little turd?"

"Our argument got a little overheated, and my mouth lost its' temper."

"Doctor Luck is this moron necessary for the operation of this building today?"

"Yes dad I am I'm in the middle..."

"Monty, he's all yours, and the ice machine is full."

"That's good to know sir, because he's going to need a lot of it."

"Dad, I'm not kidding. My experiment is seven weeks old. I've put a lot of work in it. I don't want to see it ruined. Please, can I stay alive for one more millennium?"

"No, I'm sort of an 'In the moment type of guy.' I like to see punishment meted out as soon as possible after the insult is given. I will move over to your desk and keep an eye on it for you."

"It would be much better if I did it, dad."

"Monty would you take that whining, terror filled little boy out of here, and teach him how to control his mouth, by controlling his brain."

"I haven't looked forward to anything like this in months Doctor. I think I'll have Steve help me."

"Steve, I'm not ready for Steve. He'll wipe the floor up with me."

"In that case, you won't have to clean it up after our exercise period is over. You get a bonus, before you get an ice bath. "

"Dad, I'm sorry. Gray I apologize. Don't let her do this to me. I won't be able to use my arms for a month. I may have to crawl to work. This is not going to be fun. Me and my big mouth."

Monty grabbed him by his belt, and lifted. She marched him down the aisle towards the exit. The scientists, assistants, and technicians stopped what they were doing, stood up, and applauded Gordon as he tiptoed past them.

They shouted, "Have fun Monty. It's been nice Gordon. Make sure he can't sit down tomorrow, or for the next month." All sorts of nice things were hurled at Gordon until he made it outside the security doors.

"You have a lot of friends in their Gordon, don't you?"

"Yes, we are all very friendly, and we would do anything for one another."

"Why didn't it sound that way to me?"

"I don't know, but we often joke around with one another that way."

Gray asked, "Dad should we give him a break?"

"Yes, just tell Monty which limb you want broken, and she will take care of it for you."

I opened my cell phone and called home.

"Hello honey, what's happening at work?"

"I just sat down at Gordon's desk to watch over one of his experiments."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



"What's the matter with Gordon?"

"Monty is bringing him home."

"Is he all right?"

"He's all right for now."

"Oh crap, what did our son do now?"

"Our son invited Gray outside."

"What's so terrible about...? You mean for a fight?"

"That's what I mean."

"Monty's going to kill him."

"No, Monty's going to let Steve kill him."

"I've met Steve. Steve is going to kill him."

"I want everyone outside the house dressed in black from head to toe; especially Zoie. Give her your black hat, and vail. You don't have much time so get going."

"Zoie may fight me on this."

"Remind Zoie where Charleston is, that should do the trick."

"Even, you are mean."

"Dear, we must teach our son to control his mouth. We are going to be in a very confined space for many years, and he cannot go flying off the handle like he did this morning."

"Even, I want to go with you. If it's a very short time I'd rather be with you than anywhere else in the universe."

"We have talked this over and over Jen, who is going to take care of Holden? Who will allow him to follow his dreams if not his mother? If I could clone you, I wouldn't hesitate. I have told you over and over again that you are the love of my life, and I would do anything for you. The only thing I can't do is stay here on Earth. Everyone would call me a fraud if I did. Holden is the future, and you hold Holden, and the future, in your hands. We can talk more about this when I get home, but this has to be. Get changed, our little rebel is getting closer to you every minute. I love you Jennifer Stars Luck."

"I love you Even Luck."

*************

"Zoie, your prince charming is on his way home."

"Is he sick or something?"

"No, not yet."

"What did my idiot do this time?"

"He invited Gray outside for a fight."

"Is Monty going to run him over with a car to make it look like an accident?"

"No Even wants us to dress up in black and wait outside for him."

Zoie started jumping up and down. "I always wanted to dress up like the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show', but my parents would never let me do it. Now I can, and they can't yell at for doing it.

Jen said, "Hurry up little girl, we don't have much time."

************

Teddy asked Newton, "Why aren't we invited to the party at grandmas'?"

"I didn't know there was a party at grandmas'."

"Have mommy call."

"Mom, Teddy says there is a party going on at grandmas. She wants you to call to find out why we weren't invited."

"I'm not going to call; it may be a private party."

Teddy started screaming her lungs out. She cried and cried and cried, and nothing Delicious did could make her stop.

"Alright Teddy, I'll call."

"Tank you mama."

"I should spank you Teddy. Every time you don't get your way, you cry."

"It works mama."

************

After conferring with Jennifer, it was decided that Newton and Teddy would lead the 'Death March' up to the steps, but only Newton would continue up to open the doors for Gordon. Delicious would be on the right side of the pathway holding Teddy. Jennifer and Zoie would be on the left side.

Jennifer found ghoulish music from a Halloween gone bye, and the speakers on the porch.

The hold up in Gordon's arrival was Steve. He was at the nest and had to be transported back to the main building. When he was advised of what the rest of his day would be like, he raised the front and of a Kia Rio, until it was nearly 45 degrees up from the ground.

Gordon stood there with his mouth open, until Monty closed it for him.

She whispered, "He is so good-looking; isn't it a shame he's gay?"

"It doesn't matter to me, I'm taken."

"Zoie would kill you if you weren't."

"That's all I would need today; getting the shit beat out of me by Steve, and then going upstairs and to get the shit beat out of me by Zoie."

"There is a way to stop that."

"How?"

"Don't get the shit beat out of you by Steve. You know enough to do it. Put everything you've learned to use, and don't let his size intimidate you. After that, it's easy."

"Do me a favor Monty; have my dad bury me by his sister. It's very pretty there."

"With an attitude like that, I'll start making the phone calls now."

************

As they got out of the car, Gordon said, "Oh shit, even they know."

Teddy and Newton were waiting for Gordon to get behind them, and then started walking slowly towards the house. Teddy lost her balance and fell. Gordon picked her up and started carrying her.

She yelled at him, "I walk, I walk." He put her down, and watched as she waddled to catch up to Newton.

Jennifer started the ghoulish music, as she, Zoie, and Delicious, with Teddy in her arms surrounded Gordon. They started dancing to the music, and singing, "Dead Man Walking" as they entered the house, and led him into his room.

Monty yelled, "15 minutes, you two."

Zoie took off her hat and veil. She looked at her hero who looked absolutely downtrodden.

She asked, "Will this help your mood?" She reached behind her dress and unbuttoned the top button. Everything fell to the floor, everything.

Gordon asked, "How about the shoes?"

Zoie listed her left foot. "I'm not wearing shoes. We have 13 minutes left, do you want to play, or do you want to talk"

"I think we should play, it will help loosen my muscles. Come here wife, I want to tell you how much I love you, and how much you mean to me."

"I did all this for you and you..."

Gordon knew exactly where she was going with this sentence, and before she could finish it, she was on the bed, underneath him, stunned.

"I keep forgetting how fast you are."

"I'm not fast at everything."

"How fast can you get out of your clothes, because if you leave me high and dry, I will cut you off forever."

Gordon was out of his clothes and into Zoie so fast, it took both their breaths away.

"Oh God woman, I love you. In the days to come people will laugh at us, because we are the only ones to have known each other. I will never want to know one another woman except you. You are just so special Zoie, so very special."

"Gordon would you do me a favor?"

"Anything, you name it and it's yours."

"Please stop talking. We only have a short time left and I've only cum twice. I need more. I need you more. Please make love to me."

"It will be my pleasure."

He pulled out of her and flipped her over onto her chest. It was not one of her favorite positions, but she always came heavily this way. He kicked her knees wide apart, and then wider. When he was at her entrance, he asked if she was ready.

She said, "No, I'm waiting for a train."

He leaned over her back and whispered, "That's funny, because I hear one coming now."

He grabbed her hips. As he pushed forward, he pulled her hips back with all the strength his arms had in them.

Zoie forced her head into the pillow so she could scream to enjoy the pain, and the pleasure she felt, in this no holds barred attack on her pussy. She came continuously, as she felt him pass through her cervix going in, and seconds later pulling out for both their enjoyment.

There was a pounding on the door to their bedroom. "Two minutes, or I will come in there, and separate you, as I would dogs."

Gordon had been holding off this entire time, and had not yet orgasmed. Now he had to race to the finish.

"Hang on Zoie, this one's for me."

With his hands holding onto her breasts, and his left leg by her hip, Gordon went into overdrive. When the feeling hit him he yelled, and exploded. He knew something felt different. As he turned her over and pulled her into his arms, and kissed her, he realized what it was.

"Oh God Zoie, with all the rushing and screaming, I forgot to put on a condom."

"I should be okay Gordon, I'm on the pill."

"I think we should get you the morning after pill anyhow. We promised your father I would always use a condom when we had sex. "

The door to their room burst open. "It's time let's go."

Monty saw the look of consternation on Gordon's face, and asked what happened this time?"

"I forgot to put a condom on."

"Am I correct in saying Zoie's on the pill?"

"Yes, but Mister Schneider made me promise to wear a condom whenever we had intercourse because the pills are only 87 percent accurate."

"How come it doesn't say that on the boxes?"

"The printing on the boxes is so small no one reads it. It says that the pills are up to 97 percent effective. It could mean near zero percent effective, and the manufacturer is covered."

"Young lady tomorrow you are going to get the morning after pill."

"Monty, this is Texas, they are not allowed to sell them here. If you to Louisiana or Arkansas to get it, you have to sign all sorts of paperwork to get it. Zoie is under age and she needs parental consent. We are going to have to ask Doctor Finch what to do."

"Okay, little one, take a bath, a really hot and thorough bath. Dummy, you come with me."

Gordon said, "Okay baby, I'll see you after my bath." 

Thank God, he was quick, because that's what he was counting on to get away from the blows the two women would have hit him.

He pulled Zoie to her feet, and apologized for messing up. He kissed her, pulled on his training gear, and followed Monty down the stairs.

****************

Steve was exerting himself in another manner. He was picking up 50-pound barbells in each hand as if they were tiny insects.

After they finished warming up, Monty told them to take their corners, and then begin. Steve stood in the center of the ring waiting for Gordon to attack him. Gordon had no such intention. He waited by the edges of the mats and waited for Steve. Steve started taunting him, and called him a little boy, afraid of a little action. 

Gordon replied, "All you have to do is catch me, and you will get all the action you need."

Steve tried for over 25 minutes to catch this mouse, but he found it to be very elusive and exceedingly cagey. Every time he got his arms close to him, or had him in his arms, Gordon seemed to slip right through them. Time after time, he had him, held him, and lost him, screaming at himself in disgust.

Gordon used this tactic to tire Steve's bulky muscles, until the point he was barely moving side to side. When he saw this, he let Steve believe he had him trapped.

Near breathless Steve said, "Where are you going to run to now, little boy?"

Quickly, Gordon launched a surprise attack, using a double kick to Steve's middle knocking him to the ground, and out of breath. 

Gordons' upper body landed on Steve's legs. He hit him with an elbow on the interior side of his right knee causing the thigh muscle to go into spasm. As Steve reached to control the spasm, Gordon moved quickly behind him, and hit him with a sharp angular blow between the base of the spine and the shoulder. Steve collapsed. Gordon rolled him over, pulled his arms behind his back, put his feet on Steve's back, and pulled.

He yelled, "Submit."

"Yes dammit, yes."

As everyone applauded, Monty said, "Little turd get over here."

"Yes Monty."

"How did you beat Steve so easily?"

"You told me how to beat him."

"I did no such thing."

"Well, maybe not in so many words, but when we were in Zoie's room and the two of you had me cornered, I realized the only way of beating superior strength was by out maneuvering him to compensate for it. Once I realize Steve was tired I let him catch me in a corner where I had just enough room to maneuver, and get in one big blow. If it worked, at a minimum, I could get behind him. If it worked really well, I could disabled his right leg. While he was tending to that, I could get behind him, and totally disable him."

"Who taught you that double kick?"

"I did."

"Get down here Zoie, and tell me all about it."

"While my lord and master was down here getting his ass kicked, I was upstairs bored to tears, watching a lady's wrestling match. This tiny wrestler was fighting a much larger opponent. In a feat of super human strength, she launched herself with both feet into her opponents' abdomen, knocking her to the mat. Once her opponent was down, in a very ladylike code of honor, she attempted to help her opponent up, by kicking her in the head, and jumping on her chest. Her attempt was futile, because her opponent was unable to rise."

Gordon said, "Darling, I have a feeling your English grades have jumped to an A+."

"Thank you dear."

Monty retorted, "I should spank both of you, because you're getting out of hand. Zoie go outside and tell me who is on guard duty. I am not through with this infant yet."

"Monty you are so mean. Can we go see your ranch instead, and call it a business trip?"

"If you can get that approved little miss, we are out of here."

"Gordon you call your dad, I will call mine. Let's see what we can cook up?"

"I'm not going to lie to my father, I won't do that."

"Not even if it means being with me?"

"I told you when I met you, I will not lie. I almost did it once; I will not do it again."

Zoie kissed him for being so true to his code of ethics, but whispered something else to him also. As she pulled away from him, a blue white arc of electricity flowed between them.

"Ouch, that one hurt."

Monty laughed. "How many times have I said that you two are dangerous together? That kiss could've started a fire."

Zoie said, "That's not funny, I think that one burnt my lips."

"Let me see it baby. If it did, I'll get salve."

Zoie opened her mouth a little, so Gordon could see if there was a burn. Instead, he grabbed her, and kissed her, while Monty laughed.

When Gordon let her go, the spark was brighter but it all seemed to go towards Zoie.

She screamed in pain again, as Gordon laughed. Well, he laughed until she hit him in the stomach, and folded him over.

"I don't want to hear a lecture about no hitting Mister Luck. Why did I get shocked, and you didn't?"

Gordon showed her the bottom of his shoe where he had a little metal plate on each of them. He said, "I'm grounded, you're not. Don't you dare hit me again. I offered to do this to your shoes and you refused."

"I don't remember that at all."

"He did little miss, I was there."

"Monty, sometimes you're no fun at all. Gordon you have my permission to do my shoes."

"Zoie, you have just moved up to position 294."

"What, I don't get preferential treatment for being your fiancé, and future wife?"

"Baby, everyone here deserves preferential treatment. They are all here to protect us from people who want nothing more than to destroy this project. If I start giving one person preferential treatment, I have give it to everyone."

Zoie grabbed him by his balls and said, "Let me try it this way; if my shoes are not done first you will have no use for these at all." She squeezed harder and then let him go.

Gordon coughed as Zoie walked up the stairs.

Monty said to him, "She certainly does have a way of making her point with you."

"Yes she certainly does."

******************

"Can I take the next two weeks off dad?"

"Why are you still alive, Gordon?"

"I have an excellent teacher, and once I put my head in gear, and close my mouth, I'm a really good student."

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to where the Buffalo roam."

"You're going to Monty's ranch?"

"Do you know everything about everyone dad?"

"Not everyone, I'm still working on the pizza boy."

"You are absolutely hysterical dad. Can I have the time off?"

"Of course you can. Naturally, Zoie stays here."

"That's fine, I wasn't taking her anyhow."

"What happened between you two?"

"Dad, that's personal. She has got to get her act together, or she's not going."

"Going where Gordon? You can't stop her from going on The Good Luck, because her dad has two picks."

"I forgot about that."

"You have to go because of the engines."

"Yes I know. It doesn't mean we have to be married."

"Gordon, do you remember I used to tell you when you were young if you tell one lie, you're going to have to tell another one to cover that one up?"

"I'm really terrible at telling lies, aren't I?"

"Not only are you terrible at telling lies, which I never want you to do again, especially to me, but make sure Zoie doesn't call me first."

"I hate myself dad. I should just have told you the truth and you would've said yes anyhow."

"Yes I would have, but now you forced me to say no."

"I understand. Thanks dad. How did my experiment come out?"

"I believe you have developed a filament for a new heat shield. We will patent it, and send it over to Schneider Industries for testing. Its applications appear to be endless, from computers to ocean liners, and from aircraft to spacecraft. It's lighter, and stronger than 'Graphene', but more importantly, this filament gobbles up heat like nothing I've ever seen before. Congratulations, my son, you have another trillion-dollar patent on your hands."

"Thank you dad, put this one in Holden's name. While Rod is in Washington, have him transfer the patent for the Nuclear Fusion Engine to Holden's name also. I'm not going to need either of them where we're going."

"Why did you have a change of heart Gordon?"

"I promised myself I would never lie. Then I lie to the one person I should never have lied to, you. You taught me everything I know. At this moment, I couldn't be angrier with myself if I tried. I just hope Holden turns out to be a better person than I ever was. I'll talk to you later dad."

"Gordon, Gordon talk to me Gordon."

I threw the phone down and said, "Shit, he's going to run."

Gray asked, "What Do You Mean He's Going to Run?"

"He's going to leave. He's going to hide. He is ashamed of himself for making a childish mistake, and he forgets that he's only child."

"Should we go home and look for him ourselves Even?"

"No, call Monty, see where she is. Tell her Gordon is on the run. She will know what to do."

Monty was on her way back to the NEST when she got the call.

"What do you mean he's running?"

"That's all Doctor Luck said Monty."

She hung up, called me, and I explained the chain of events.

"I hate kids, they're not grown ups."

"Monty, that's the reason they're called children."

"That is why I never had any children of my own Doctor. Dealing with adults is hard enough."

"Find my son please; don't let anything happen to him."

"Don't worry about a thing Doctor. I won't kill him, until you see him alive one last time."

When we finished, I called Jennifer.

"Hi babe, where are you?"

"I'm having sex with Zoie, while we are waiting for Holden to get out of school."

"That sounds interesting, and exciting. Would you take pictures for me please?"

"Even, you are a pig."

"There is absolutely nothing wrong with a little homosexual sex dear, if that is what your lifestyle requires."

"You are still a pig."

"We have more problems than me being a pig."

"What is going on now?"

"I caught Gordon in a lie, and he got angry with himself for telling it, because he knew it was not necessary. He got so angry with himself, he said I'll talk to you later, and hung up the phone. He's on the run; I just know it. Monty is on her way back to the house, and I'm sure she's calling out the troops to find him."

"Why would he run Even? What would make him do that?"

"Jen, our son acts like a fully grown adult most of the time. However, he is only 16-years-old, and sometimes he reacts like the child he really is. He is very embarrassed by what he did. I believe he is looking for a hole in the ground big enough to crawl into, and to cover himself over, so he can't be found."

"What do we do now Even?"

"Go home, I'll be there in an hour, or so. I have to check with the general to see what they're doing to find him."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



"Okay, I'll tell Zoie what's going on."

Zoie realized the part she played in this debacle, and started to cry.

"Mom, it's my fault. I badgered him into it. I told him it was the only way dad would let us go. I really fucked things up. How am I going to fix this?"

"I think you should tell Even what you did. Then we still have the problem of finding Gordon. We know he's on foot, so we can only cover so much ground per hour. Our people will find him. He will have to use a credit card, or debit to get money. He will leave a trail, and we will follow him, until we catch him, and bring him home."

"Can I beat the shit out of him for leaving me when he gets here?"

"Zoie there is going to be a long line ahead of you, and you must remember, you are the one that started this nightmare."

"Yeah, I did."

****************

Monty arrived back at the house first to set up the command post. There was only one car there with four agents to cover both houses. The other car went with Jennifer to pick up Holden at school.

When the four agents were asked if they saw Gordon leave the Luck household, none of them was positive, but each of them said it was possible. When Monty checked the front door, it was unlocked, which was a breach of protocol. Jennifer would never have left the house with out locking the door and setting the alarm.

Someone trying to leave the house undetected would. She was going to break his eight fingers, and both of his thumbs for doing it.

She walked into the house with one of the guards from Delicious squad as her back up. They both had their guns drawn, as they moved from room to room making sure the house was secure.

They were walking down the stairwell with a perfect view of the area and there was no movement, when they heard the front door being jostled. They ran upstairs and took defensive positions, only to have Holden run into the house, followed by Jennifer and Zoie.

Jennifer looked at the guns, which were now pointed down at the ground, and said, "Honest, we lived here."

Monty said, "You almost lived here permanently, six feet under the ground. Did you forget to lock the front door, and set the alarm?"

"I most certainly did not. You can ask Zoie. When we go out, I set the alarm, when we come back she disarms it."

"Zoie when I catch your fiancé, he's going to be out of commission for 100 years."

Zoie's head was down, and her mouth was closed, until Jennifer kicked her shoe.

"Don't you have something to say to Monty?"

"It's a beautiful day, isn't it?"

"Zoie, either I'm going to kill you, or Monty is. Either way, you are going to be dead if you don't tell the truth."

"Monty, all of this is my fault. I forced Gordon to tell a lie. Worse than that, I set it up for him to be caught."

"Why would you do such a thing?"

"I wanted to know if he loved me as much as he said he did. I think I should go back to Charleston. I don't think he'll ever want to speak to me again."

Gordon said, "I think that's an excellent idea. I'll live at my sister's house until you're gone."

Monty turned and looked at him, "Little turd, before you go anywhere, where we you today?"

"I was following your advice Monty. You told me over and over again, when you make a mistake, and you are angry with yourself, take it out on yourself. That's exactly what I've been doing. I've been downstairs using every machine, and weight we have. I finally learned how to jump rope properly. I can now do 70 crunches on the anti-gravity machine. I was in the ice bath when the two of you came down, but I had 5 minutes more to go. I waited until my time was up. I'm very glad I did, otherwise I never would have heard what my fiancé said about setting me up to lie to my dad. I hope she's very happy with what she's accomplished, and with her future."

"Zoie, if you give me five minutes, I will throw some clothes in a bag, and move next-door with my sister."

Tears were pouring from her eyes, "Can we talk for one moment please?"

"Sure, you can talk, while I pack my clothes."

************

Zoie sat by the headboard, next to the wall, looking for the right words to say. Unfortunately, she could not think of any. He packed his clothes just as he packed hers. He pulled the drawers out of the slots, dumped the clothes into the suitcase, and put the drawer to the side. He added one pair of shoes one pair of sneakers, and one pair of workout sweats before he put in his work shirts. He had plenty of room remaining in the suitcase, because he did not think he would be gone that long.

He looked at her sitting in the corner of the bed and said, "I thought you wanted to talk, and yet I haven't heard a word leave your mouth. Just in case you are wondering, I will always love you. However, after what you did to the relationship between my father and me today, I will never be able to forgive you."

"I've been sitting here trying to find the right words to say to you about what I did, and why I did them. The only answer I came up with so far is, "I don't know." We both loved each other from the second we met. Why would I have to test you by having you lie to your father, and then tell him that you were going to do it. I don't know.

I walked into their room and said, "That's what we're going to sit down and find out. No one's leaving this room until I know what happened today."

"Dad, don't get into the middle of our argument. I hurt you too much today, and it would kill me to hurt you again."

"Gordon when you hung up the phone today I was sure you were going to run. I wasn't sure if I was ever going to see you again. Knowing that you are home, and safe, means more to me than 'The Best Luck.' If you think I am mad, you should have heard Monty. I don't know how you're still breathing. I didn't think she'd give you a chance to explain what you did. Working out was a stroke of genius. If you did anything else, I think she would have ripped your lungs out.

Gordon, are you going to be able to be quiet or should I get tape, because while Zoie is talking you are not allowed to utter a sound, not one sound."

"I will need tape and rope dad."

"Monty, bring in the kit please."

Monty brought in a bag filled with stuff.

Zoie stay where you are. Get on that chair Gordon.

As soon as he was sitting, Monty took a double length of rope, wrapped it around his chest, under and over the steel beam supports of the rear of the office type chair, under the seat and around his lap in the front. She took another length of rope and called for a bucket of hot water. She let the knot sit in the water for a moment and then continued tying Gordon in the chair using more rope. Then she moved him aside, and called for Steve.

Steve walked in with a small ladder, a stud finder, and a power drill. He looked at me and said, "It's right here Doctor Luck."

"Do it."

Steve got on the second step of the ladder, push the drill against the ceiling, and hit the switch. The drill went through the wallboard, and wood almost as easily as a group of termites would have done. When he was finished, he took a huge hook out of his back pocket and screwed it into the ceiling.

I looked at Gordon and said, "Steve would like nothing more than to get even with you for what you did to him the other day. Show him Steve."

"Your dad promised me if you opened your mouth I can hang you from that hook."

"I know that's why I asked for tape."

"You'll never guess what I forgot to buy?"

"You bastard, I will kill you for this." 

"No you won't, you tricked me the last time, and it won't happen again. I'm going to take you apart piece by piece. You will never know where you are, and where I'm hitting you from, because I'm going to spin you around in circles until you are so dizzy you won't know where I am."

"Are you going to take a shower?"

Steve made a move towards Gordon, but Monty stepped between them.

"Get out of here Steve, before he beats you up again."

"He hasn't got a prayer."

"He has a brain, do you? Now get out of here."

"Come on little miss, it's time to tie you up."

Monty bound her hands and feet together and left her lying on the bed.

"She's all done Doctor. I give him 15 seconds maybe 18 seconds before he opens his big mouth. Then we can laugh as we hang him from the ceiling. Should I stay, or should I walk outside?"

"Given him a moral victory Monty. Go outside and close the door, then walk back as soon as he loses."

"Like Monty said dad, I have a brain, I have the ability to control myself, most of the time."

"There is the catch my son, 'Most Of The Time.' Will you be able to control your mouth against the person you love?"

"If she loved me as much as I love her, she wouldn't have done what she did to me today."

"Zoie, why don't you tell me what happened today?"

"Dad, what I told Gordon outside is the truth; I don't know why I did it."

"Bulls... Oh fuck."

Monty walked into the room. "I'm sorry Doctor Luck that was only three seconds."

"Hang him high Monty. He said he had the ability to control his mouth, because he had a brain. His brain doesn't work at all when it comes to Zoie. Steve get in here."

"It's my pleasure Doctor."

Steve angled himself on the second and third steps of the ladder, as Monty handed him the looped end of the rope. Then she waited.

"Now Monty."

Monty squatted and in a dead lift, picked up Gordon and the chair nearly four feet above the floor. Steve used his bulk to lift Gordon up two more feet and hung the rope onto the hook. You could hear the beam creak as it took on the additional weight.

Gordon said, "Monty, I will never fight you. I will fall down on the floor and play dead before I fight you. You just lifted 162 pounds of me, plus the chair, straight up. I nearly had a heart attack while you did it. Steve, you are a wuss."

Monty started spinning Gordon. "What you didn't see young man, was Steve lifting you straight up two feet, with one arm, and no real balance at all. His feet were on two separate levels of the ladder, so he couldn't use his back or legs to increase the force needed in his arms to add momentum to his lift. No one else in our company could have done what he just accomplished. Say you're sorry, or I'll let him hit you."

Steve said, "Please don't say you're sorry, I'd love to hit you."

"Do I get to hit you back later?"

"Yes."

"Go for it Steve."

I said to my son, "Gordon you're out of your mind."

Monty said "Let him go Doctor, he's getting too big for his britches."

"You are probably both right, but today has been one of those extraordinary days in my life. I lied to my father, because my fiancé talked me into it. My fiancé sets me up to get caught in that lie. I am no longer getting married, because of that lie. I lied to my father, the one person in my life I should never have told a lie. Dad you taught me everything I know, and that's how I returned your kindness. I'm sorry. I have half of the people that are supposed to be guarding the NEST, running all over the place looking for me, while I'm downstairs in my own home training, because I didn't have the common sense to tell you that's what I was going to do. I was not going to react like a baby and run away. I was going to take my punishment like a man, because that's what I want to be looked upon as, not only as your son, but as someone who can be relied upon in a pinch. What else could I possibly do wrong for me today? If there is anything else, it might as well be Steve hitting me."

Steve smiled. "Thank you you asshole."

"You're welcome Steve."

Steve angled the ladder, placed his feet on the second and third steps, and lined Gordon's jaw at the correct height for his fist.

"Do you have any last words little pigeon?"

"Yes, can I close my eyes?"

"You can do anything you want."

"Enjoy yourself Steve, happy hunting."

Steve looked at everyone in the room and said, "Watch out for flying blood."

"Yours or mine?"

"You insolent little prick, I'm going to make you eat those words." 

As Steve reared back, Gordon pushed his feet against Steve's muscular thighs, and pushed himself away from him. Off-balance Steve grabbed for the ladder to steady himself.

Gordon bent his body forward, as much as he could, and his legs rearward to gain as much potential energy as he could out of his rearward movement. As he reached apogee, he extended his legs forward to pick up momentum and his body back reducing drag, like the fuselage of an aircraft, without a tail. It wasn't much, but it was just enough.

As Steve regained his balance, he looked straight ahead and saw Gordon's feet heading straight for him. It was too late for him to do anything about it.

Gordon connected with Steve's hips, knocking him, and the ladder off kilter. They both swayed and finally hit the ground. Steve rolled into a standing position, and charged at Gordon. He only ran in to Monty.

"You had your chance Steve. Now he gets his when we're finished with him."

Steve dropped his head, and broke out into a laugh. "If he is not the sneakiest son of a bitch I've ever met, no one is."

"I know Steve, and you'd like to take him home with you."

"No he's not big enough; I'd need two of him."

"Picky aren't you?"

"Hell, we're even legal in Texas now."

"What is this world coming to?"

Monty looked up at Gordon, who had a big smile on his face.

"Little turd, you have a choice for your next match. Will it be Logan or Jayden?"

"Didn't you get my email Monty?"

"What did it say?"

"Due to pressing scientific matters, I hereby retire from all physical activity, forever, and ever, amen."

"Yes I did get that one. I thought it was so funny, I used it to wipe my ass."

"I meant every word of it."

"I'm sure you did. However, who did you get permission from to make that decision? There are only four people who were allowed to make those decisions at this facility for you. Your father, Mister Valentino, Mister Zabo, and me, which one of us gave you written permission to stop training?"

"You left one person out Monty; God."

"You are absolutely correct. How could I ever forget Her? Just give me her written permission slip, cosigned by one of the members of the "Deep Space Science Project" and you will never have to do physical training again."

"You would want God to have a cosigner?"

"You must remember little turd this is a private entity and only the 20 members of this entity are allowed to make decisions for it. According to the by-laws, there are no exceptions, not even for the 'Almighty Herself.'

"Can I say one more thing before this inquisition continues?"

"Always, you are the one that's hanging up there. You are the one with the brain that managed to sneak a quick blow in and knock Steve on his ass. What do you have to say now?"

"I want you to come with us. You are by far the smartest nonscientific person I have ever met."

"I'm sorry little turd, but I don't fit the profile."

"Dad, please."

"I'm sorry son. We set the profile up for specific reasons."

"I know, but sometimes there has to be an exception."

"Let's continue where we were, and someone put a sock in his mouth."

Steve said, "It will be my pleasure."

"A cloth sock Steve."

"Dammit."

************* (Hello readers, I have just returned from another four weeks stay at Anderson, What Fun! I will tell you more at the end of Chapter 25. Thank God for notes.)

As Steve climbed the ladder one more time Gordon yelled, "Not those socks you idiot, I just finished using them. They are filthy."

As he stuffed the socks into Gordon's mouth Steve said, "I'm sorry Gordon my hearing is a little bit off, because my head hit the ground when I fell. Did you say something about getting your rocks off?"

"Ymdm mpho bsom fsjd..."

"I'm going to have to get my hearing checked. I didn't understand a word you said."

"Thank you Steve, would you please leave us alone now. Monty please stay, I think I'm going to need a woman's point of view on this situation."

"With all due respect Doctor, I think Jennifer would be able to give you better advice on this then I would. At this moment, I would kill both of them for being so stupid, and acting like children."

"You've hit the point right on the head already Monty. They are acting like children, and that is exactly what they are 'teenage children.' They are no longer babies, or youngsters. They are not yet equipped to take on the world as full-fledged adults. Their minds are not prepared for that yet. They are not socially ready to take on the world. Where you ready to take on the world when you were 16 years old?"

"I am not a good one to use as an example for them. I was an Army brat. Every few years we were transferred to a new base. When I was 16, I was on Guam. Before that, it was Anchorage, Washington State, and Japan. I never developed good friendships, because my father was in a small communications detachment that went where it was needed, and not with the rest of the division. That's where I learned to develop my mind and my body into a machine. I could take care of myself in any situation, and didn't have to depend on anyone else."

"You still didn't answer my question Monty. Were you mentally ready to take on the world when you were 16 years old?"

"No I was not. I could have survived, but I was not ready for what was outside the gates of the Army base."

"Thank you Monty. Thank you for being so honest with me."

"Okay Zoie, you will no longer be interrupted while you are talking. I know the position you are in is not comfortable, but if I think you're lying to me, we will make the ropes tighter, and let you know what pain really feels like. Your fiancé already knows what it feels like, because you cut his heart out when you made him lie to me. He knew he could've asked me for anything, and I would have given it to him without a second thought. Why did you feel it was necessary to do it your way?"

"Dad, I have gone over this in my mind hundreds of times. The first thing I think of is how stupid I was to ask him to do it my way. The second thing I think of is why I would tell you he was going to lie to you in advance. Why would I do those things to the person I love most in this world and I come up with the only answer I can think of, 'I don't know, I just don't know."

Gordon went wild as he was hanging from the ceiling. He twisted his body, and yelled through the socks in his mouth.

I got up from my chair, walked over to him, and for the first time in my life, I smacked my son. He looked at me as if I had shot him but he stopped moving instantly.

"One more outburst like that Gordon and you will not be allowed in the lab again. Two more and I will train people to work on the engines in our spacecraft. I will leave you here on earth. You said you lied to the only person you should never lie to, and at this moment I am not lying to you. Control yourself, or you are out of our program. Do you understand me?"

All muscle movement in his body ceased, I don't believe he blinked.

I stood in front of him for a moment, and finally I said, "That is much better. Make sure you stay that way or you will be back in Denver, before you know what happened to you."

I saw a tear form in his eye as I turned away from him. I did not know if it was because I hit him, or because of the threat of leaving him here on earth. Both were an anathema to him, and he knew he deserved both, because of his transgressions. He would have preferred being beaten up and dragged along the floor by Steve, then be slapped, and threatened by me.

I turned and walked back to him. I pulled the socks out of his mouth. "I don't think we will need these to keep you quiet anymore, will we?"

"No sir, I will not say a word."

"Don't make me regret this decision."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 25



"I won't sir."

"Where were we Zoie?"

"You asked me why I did it dad, and I told you I didn't know. It is the truth, deep down inside me when I look for that answer it's the only one I can come up with. I knew you would let us go with Monty, and there was no need for any subterfuge. Why I forced him to lie to you makes no sense to me now, or then. Everything was wonderful between us. Then I pull this stupid stunt that could only hurt the three of us, and that's exactly what it has done.

I hurt because of what happened between the two of you.

I hurt because of what is happening between the two of us.

I hurt because we have lost our future.

All of this is my fault, and for the life of me, I don't know why I did it. I'll call my mother, and have her pick me up as soon as possible. I want you and Gordon to be able to repair your relationship. That is very important to me. He has worked too hard to be left on Earth. It would not be fair to him to be left behind. I will not be one of my father's picks, so Gordon doesn't have to worry about being cooped up with me. I guess that's all I have to say."

I untied her, and pulled her into my arms.

"You are a very brave and very honest young woman Zoie. They should clone you, and make billions more just like you. You made a mistake, but all children do. That's how they learn, and grow up to be functioning adults. I'm very proud of you. Why don't you get something to eat, while we take Gordon down from his perch."

"Thank you dad, I'm sorry I did all this."

"As far as I'm concerned Zoie, it's all over, and we are starting anew."

I kissed her forehead. I opened the bedroom door, let her out, and closed the door.

"Do you believe her Gordon?"

"Yes, but it doesn't change anything. She made me lie to you, and I can't forgive her for that."

"Okay, Monty let's get him down."

"Doc put the pillows on the floor."

"Wait a minute, how are you going to get me down to the floor?"

"We're going to cut the knot on the rope, and let you drop to the floor."

"Are you two crazy, I could get killed doing that."

"You are absolutely correct, my son. However, I can never forgive you for lying to me. This is the way I've decided to get you down. Consider yourself lucky I'm not leaving you here."

"Dad you heard Zoie tell you it was her fault."

"You are the one that told me you had a mind of your own. You didn't have to lie to me. You could have asked me properly, and none of this would've happened. This is more your fault then Zoie's."

"How do you figure that out dad? She told me to do it, and I did it because I love her."

"I told you a long time ago that love is deaf, dumb, and blind. You just added stupid to that quotation. You didn't have to follow her request, because you have free will, and a mind of your own. Just because you love someone does not mean you are going to jump into an active volcano, or stand in the way of an oncoming tornado. Sometimes you have to use common sense, and you didn't use any at all."

"Monty, let's swing him before we cut the rope, and see if he lands on the pillows."

"Do you want to do any of your advanced mathematics to see what chance he has on landing on these pillows Doctor?"

"I already have Monty. The odds are 14.5 million to 1."

Gordon said, "I'll bet you $10 at those odds."

"I accept."

"If little turd is that sure, I'll go in too."

"Let's get Steve and the ladder in here, so he can cut the rope."

Steve was only too happy to oblige. This time he straddled the top of the ladder and sat on the top ledge. He twisted the rope as tight is it could go, and started swinging Gordon. As the twisting and swinging motion increased in speed, Steve started cutting the cord. When it finally snapped, Gordon went flying out the door, and into the hallway. He landed with a mighty thud against the opposite wall.

I said, "That will be $20 please."

"Don't you want to see if I'm hurt first?"

"I want my money. Then I will check you over. Monty I know you're good for it."

Gordon walked into the room, opened his wallet, and handed me a $10 bill.

"You look fine to me. You're standing up straight, you're not walking with a limp, and your arms are moving without any discomfort. What's going on in your head is another matter. You will have to figure that out for yourself. You are suspended from work for two days without pay for the stunt you pulled today."

"Yes sir, can I see the report on my filament."

"I'm sorry, it's not your filament. You told me to have it put in Holden's name."

"Okay, I'll run the program again and find out what my results were."

"You won't do that in my lab."

"Dad you asked Monty if she was ready to take on the world when she was 16 years old, and she said no. I'm going to hire a lawyer, and become emancipated. I may not be ready, but I know when I'm being taken advantage of, and you are doing it now. I lied to you, and I regret it. I will probably always regret it. However, I am not going to let you run roughshod over my life. I have a mind of my own and I'm going to use it the best way I know how. If I want to know how my filament experiment came out, and you won't give me the findings, I'm going to do it again and find out for myself. If you won't let me do it in your lab, I'll build one of my own. I will start from scratch like you did. It may take me years to get into space, but somehow someway, I will get there."

"Did you hear that little kernel of truth in the middle of that dialogue Monty? It took him a long time, but he finally realized what he had to say and what he had to do."

"I've told you Doctor, he has a big mouth, and when he takes his feet out of it, sometimes wisdom will fall out of it."

"Okay you two, what did I do this time?"

"Children, they don't hear what they're saying."

"Of course they do Monty. They just don't remember it from one second to the next."

"Come on guys this is not funny. What did I say or do that I was supposed to remember, but did not know I said."

"You should get him one of those tape recorders he can wear around his neck. Any time he says something the machine will record it."

"You mean something like this?"

I showed Monty a tiny voice activated transceiver.

"If you ever stop being a scientist doctor, you can be one of us. You think of everything."

Gordon used my line. "Not everyone, or everything, he still working on the pizza boy. Now please tell me when I said, or I was supposed to remember."

"Do you remember saying this Gordon? ' I have a mind of my own and I'm going to use it the best way I know how.' Do you remember saying that my son?"

"I hate myself. You gave me just enough rope to hang myself with, and I did. I thought I was angry with you, when I was actually angry with myself, and I walked right into your trap. Why do you even put up with me sometimes? I am so full of myself I don't think I could ever make a mistake. I've already made two of them today and I was about to make a third. If she will forgive me, I will keep that from happening."

"Monty, I want on to take the next three weeks off. I need you to do a hand count on your Buffalo."

"I have a lot of Buffalo Doctor. I'm going to need some help."

"Would you consider taking two deranged teenagers with you, while they work their problems out together?

"No, I won't mind. The buffalo might, but they have a way of scaring stupid children away from them."

"Okay, I'll charter a jet, and you can leave tomorrow. Take Liz with you, from what I understand there is going to be a war between the Colonel and the General over her status. We might as well keep her out of the line of fire."

"I said it before Doctor, you think of everything."

"Why are you still here Gordon? I thought you were going to start taking care of number three."

"I just wanted to tell you one thing dad. I'm going to circulate a petition through the membership of the Deep Space Science Project to get the profile changed. Monty is too important to me to leave behind. She could be head of security on the ship, and you don't have anyone designated for that position. If a problem develops while we are in space who is going to take care of it? We are going to need security, and there is no one better than she is. I just wanted you to know in advance, I am the one starting this petition drive, and I'm not doing it behind your back."

"You do what you feel you have to do Gordon, and the 20 of us will make that decision for you."

"That's all I can ask for dad."

*******************

123. Good Morning

"Good morning Adam, how was your night?"

"Good morning Laura, I must admit it was the most confusing and thrilling night, I've ever had. I learned more about space in the shortest period of time imaginable. I also got more confused about human relationships between you and your parents in an equally short period of time. I can understand why only one of you is going into space. If two of you were going, and we met another race of people, they wouldn't want to come any place near our planet for fear of catching whatever disease you two have."

"I know you're not going to believe this Adam, but my mother and I love one another fiercely. It just so happens that when we argue, we argue the same way, fiercely. When she plays back all her messages, and realizes I did call to tell her I was coming, and this wasn't a surprise visit, she will feel like the village idiot, and call me to apologize. I will tell her to go fuck herself, because I am as obstinate as she is. The one who will end this will be Anna. Anna has always been the peacemaker in our family."

"You are all idiots."

"How much money did you say you have in the bank?"

"It's not enough to cover one of your bets."

"Then don't go around calling us idiots. My mother was making over $1 million a day working for the FBI when she was 19 years old. How many people do you know, who work for the government get paid that amount of money per day?"

"Can I ask what your mother was doing to make that amount of money?"

"She was using her computer skills to take down the New York mob, and for a while it worked."

"Last night you told me that your husband's father was the head of one of the five families of New York."

"That is correct, and Don Bruno, my grandfather, was the man she was after."

"No wonder your family is screwed up. Have you ever thought of writing a book about your family?"

"One day one of our great-grandchildren may do it. However, who is going to believe a love story between two people, a man with a photographic memory, who makes fortunes for the mob in New York and finds one member stealing from the other four bosses. The code of the Mafia forces him to inform the other bosses about the theft. They kill the fifth member causing the rise of Bruno Valentino to the head of his family.

During his good times with the mob, this man made fortunes, hand over fist for everyone, including himself. He fell in love with an innocent and he fathered a child with her. For almost 19 years, this child lived an idyllic life in upstate New York. She received Three Masters Degree's in computer security, until at graduation day, pictures of her and her mother are taken and sent back to Don Bruno for verification. He sends a death warrant out on both of them. The phone in her dorm is attached to explosives and 40 students at the University are killed. A friend driving her car home is blown up on the Massachusetts Turnpike. Her mother is savagely beaten, tied up to their homes natural gas tank, and blown up with the house. The only thing that saved the young woman was one word, "Swordfish."

For the next hour, Laura told Adam the story of her mother's life. When she was finished, Adam sat there in thought for a few moments and finally shook his head.

"How did she hold herself together? I would've been a basket case."

"Do you want to sit here for the next month and talk about my mothers' life, or do you want to fill out your resume and submit it to get onto the spacecraft?"

"Can we make love first?"

"We don't know each other well enough to do that Adam. I think I want to go to my wedding bed as my mother did, as a virgin. My cousin Delicious went to her wedding bed the same way. I'm not promising you anything. You are a very nice guy, and I like you a lot. I am 24 years old and no one has ever touched me in a sexual area of my body. My sister Anna was the same way, until very recently. She and Cloudy are getting married very soon. They were sweethearts in college, but they never had sex until recently.

My brother is a totally different story. Girls went after him.

My father bought him condoms and put us on the pill when we were 15 years old. We found out, when he came home from the University of Michigan, that while he was getting his Master's Degree, and graduated with honors that he never studied. Girls were lined up outside his apartment waiting to get in so they could get laid. He had all the hormones working in overdrive, and Anna and I lived like nuns.

Therefore, if you want a chance with me, here are the rules: There will be no fooling around. No touching, even when we are overheated. Kissing is allowed as long as it's mutually agreed upon. Most important you have got to be accepted to go along with us into space. Our first night together will be in the spacecraft after we take off. I would like to get married on Christmas Eve, so my family can see it happen. When we go into stasis, I would like to arrange it so we can go side-by-side. I know this is an awful lot to put in front of you, but those are my rules, and unfortunately, for you, they are 'take them or leave them."

"Well, in that case, we better start on my resume. What do we need?"

Laura threw herself into his arms and kissed him.

"Really, you'll give it a try?"

"You just broke one of your own rules."

"Which one did I break?"

"You said kissing had to be mutually agreed upon. I didn't agreed-upon that one. I demand another one to get even."

"Tell me you didn't like the first one, and you can have a second one."

"In your rules there was nothing said about lying correct?"

"No, but it seems I'm going to have to put one in there for just that purpose."

"Come here Laura, I did not enjoy my first kiss."

"Liar."

His kiss was not like hers. It was slow, ardent, and meaningful.

When she backed away from him she said, "Paper and pen please."

As soon as Adam turned his back to her, Laura used her hand to fan her face. She mused, "Boy, he kisses good."

She reached into her handbag, took out her cell phone, and text her mother.

"Why didn't you tell me love was so grand?"

Her phone rang instantly.

"Hello this is the Adam and Laura Schiff residence."

"Are you trying to kill our mother before my wedding?"

"Hi Anna, how is your night?"

"About six feet two inches tall, and a little more than eight inches long. How was yours?"

"Lovely, truly lovely, Adam is a wonderful young man."

"You're still a virgin aren't you?"

"You're still a pain in the ass. How did you know?"

"The morning after Cloudy and I did it, I was bouncing off the walls. It was so much fun I nearly killed him. He slept the whole next day."

"I talked with Adam about it this morning. I told him if he really wanted me, he had to be approved as a plumber on the spacecraft, we would get married on the 24th, and our first night together would be in space."

"You don't want much do you?"

"I waited this long, I may as well wait a few more months and get what I want. He does kiss like the devil himself."

"Well at least you made it to first base. Are you going to call mom?"

"Sometime later today, but we have to fill out Adam's resume first, and get that out."

"Good girl, have fun."

"I'll talk to you later."

********

123 (A.) Good Afternoon

"Good afternoon General Morgan, this is Liz at the front security entrance."

"Hello Liz, how are you feeling?"

"I'm ready to get back to active duty sir, but we have a pain in the ass Colonel that won't let me. Every time he hears me grunt or groan, he puts me back on light duty. He really is a pain sir."

"Liz, this is the first time in my military career, I can say I agree with that pain in the ass. Take your time, and get completely well. We have nothing pressing going on right now, and everything is covered. What do you have for me?"

"Sir according to your schedule you are expecting two people: Jaclyn Smith, and David Doyle. Ms. Smith has brought a trainee with her. Her name is Katherine Jackson. Should I allow all three up?"

"I don't know why I have a weird feeling about this."

"I could always come up as your secretary, with a pad and paper to take notes of the meeting."

"You are just dying to get back into action, aren't you Liz?"

"Me sir, I would never go against Colonel Canyon's orders, unless they were countermanded by a higher ranking officer."

"Okay, escort the three of them up here, and bring two agents to stand by the open outside door. If anything happens, it's shoot to kill, with no questions asked. Put the building, and the NEST on silent lockdown, and advise everyone this is not a drill.

I didn't do my due diligence with Wells Fargo on these people, and they could be anyone. Tell them I apologize for the delay, but I'm on the phone with the Secret Service attempting to set up security arrangements for the President for our Christmas Day launch time, if he wants to attend. He's normally in Hawaii, at that time, but we felt obligated to extend the invitation. While they are waiting, find out the name of the head of the Secret Service. It would be embarrassing not knowing to whom I was speaking."

"No problems sir, I'll put them in the agents' ready room. They should be thrilled."

******************

"Good afternoon, I apologize for keeping you waiting. The Secret Service is some piece of work. I have 300-armed professionals guarding this facility, and they want me to disarm them while the president is here. I told them I would send a list of the people that work for me and they could vet each one of them as we did before we hired them. We were not going to disarm any of them, because this project was more important than the President of the United States. If he wants to come, that's fine with us. Otherwise, he can watch it in the warmth of Hawaii, while he's playing golf."

Let's get down to business, because I have no idea what to do with this money, although I'd like to shoot the man that gave it to me.

Jaclyn Smith opened the discussion. "General, I can tell you were never a wealthy man, and most military men never are. The first thing that you must be aware of is the IRS is going to come after you, and take a huge chunk out of this. You should retain a tax attorney immediately. There were many good ones in Dallas, and Austin. Before you sign with that company, you should find out their fees, and decide if you want them as a yearly partner or only as necessary. Always keep track of your money, never let anyone, including Wells Fargo, our company, tell you everything is fine, and never give you a figure. You always want to know the exact amount of money that is in your account monthly. You are not dealing with a small amount of money, and you want this money to grow, not diminish. There are many ways to accomplish this goal, and we are not going to do it all in one day. There is too much information for you to absorb. It would not be fair to you to try and make a decision about your new wealth in one day. What we'd like to do today is simply show you some of our options, and there are many more. These are basic plans, simple to understand, and easy for you to move your money around. The fees are very low, and as you become more accustomed to dealing with your money, you may want to move them into more high-risk investments, or because of your age, stay with low risk investments that shield you from taxes, as you get older. Let me show you some of our brochures."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



He released her arms without her asking him to do so. She spun around and kissed him.

"I think I need a timeout, would you care to join me?"

Newton said, "Oh no, they are going to have sex."

"No Newton, it is not that kind of timeout. I'm just going to do what my psychiatrist told me to do when I'm tense. If I was going to have sex with your father, it is none of your business. The second thing she told me to do if I was tense was to kill my oldest child. Do you want to guess who that might be Newton?"

"I don't have to guess mom, because it's me. How would you explain my disappearance, or death to the police?"

"I wouldn't have to explain it to them. I would pack your body into plastic bags, and surround you in chemical ice. I would place your body between walls one and two, of the spacecraft. After we put in 504,900 gallons of water between walls one and two, and the bearings between walls two and three, nobody will ever look for Newton Luck Thyme ever again."

"Can I go to your psychiatrist with you? I have to tell him that you threatened to kill me."

"First, you can come with me anytime you want. Second, my psychiatrist is a woman. She wants to kill her husband, just as much as I want to kill your father every now and again, because he is such a pain in the ass. It doesn't mean I'm going to act on it. It just means it's a thought that passes through my mind. I will never act on it, because I love him too much to harm him."

"Do you love me that much?"

"I love everyone in our family that much. I love your father, you, your sister, your grandfather, your grandmother, your cousins, aunts, uncles, and every other relative in our clan. I also have friends that I would never harm. It doesn't mean I can't get angry with any of them, or they with me. That's why we are called a family, and families argue all the time."

"This stuff is hard to understand mom."

"Newton that is the reason you are not born as an adult. Growing up is very hard. One day I want you and your father to sit down, and talk about me. I want you to know how terrible I was as a teenager, when your father and I first met.

The only reason I am half as grown up as I am now is because of your father, and the love he has for me. He should have walked away from me days after we met. I was such a terrible person, my father should have thrown me out of his house too, but instead, he helped me. 

I would tell you all the nasty things I did to your father, and my father, but you wouldn't believe me. Your dad will have to tell you, and you will believe him, because I'm telling him now, in front of you, to tell you the truth, and how hard it was for him to stay with me."

"Gray, I want you to tell Newton everything, warts, and all."

"As usual, Delicious, I think you're out of your mind. However, I will do as you ask."

Gray said, "Boys, I believe you are making a mistake. You have 50-inch cardboard in the playroom, with a 40-inch door. You will never be able to take it out of that room, if that is your intention. I would suggest you take it out of that room now, and move it to the living room. We all know you are making Holden's spacecraft, so it is no surprise to any of us. It will give you much more room to work with, and if you want, we can move the furniture around, and give you much more room if you need it."

Holden said, "You looked at our project already?"

"Guilty; you left the door open, and I couldn't help peaking at it. What you boys did in 2 ½ hours, would take a team of engineers a month to do. That work is fabulous, I couldn't believe how technically advanced the three of you are. May I ask a question?"

Holden said, "Sure, go ahead."

"For the nuclear engine's, did you just guess at the size needed, or did you do the math involved?"

"We didn't guess Uncle Gray. The hardest part was figuring out the tonnage of the spacecraft. After that, we used Gordon's formula for the fusion engines. We immediately knew we could not use one engine, because there was nothing strong enough to hold it when extended. We continued using the math and came up with the three pair design and that worked the best. As we continued doing the math, it became obvious we could not lower one without causing an imbalance to the spacecraft. We would have to lower them in pairs."

"How are you going to extend the engines?"

"We are not going to extend them. We are going to lower them from their containment units directly out of the bottom of the spacecraft by 18 feet, and then angle them back by 67 degrees until they nearly touch the hull."

"One more question I'll let you get back to work. How much is this spacecraft going to weigh?"

"Our gross figure came out to 400 million pounds."

"400 million pounds? Do you realize that is twice the weight as our largest aircraft carrier?"

"Yes dad we checked."

"Newton, I can't think of anything that will hold the weight of something that heavy while you're building it. Even the new filament Gordon invented, and patented in Holden's name will not hold something that large for that many years, while you build it."

"Water."

"What did you say?"

"Water, we are going to build a swimming pool 1025 feet in circumference, and 50 feet deep. Once the legs and central core are positioned correctly, we will cover them with either Gordon's new invention, or something that comes up afterwards, to make it watertight, and continue to roll it out until the entire pool area is covered. We will do this twice more on different axis.' As the water reaches the appropriate height, the engineering section will be lifted from its position, and moved into place by overhead cranes. The first point of contact will be the Center Core. The smaller cranes will twist the engineering section into the proper position to meet the 12 load bearing legs. When that happens, the overhead crane will lower the engineering section slowly until he gets 13 green lights. The smaller cranes will let go of the engineering section, as soon as workers detach their cables and raise them high enough to miss all the instruments onboard.

The overhead crane will lower its cables until they go slack. The restraining bolts will be detached from the Central Core, the cables lifted, and the overhead crane safed.

"Holden this is your dream project. Would you mind if I ran your facts and figures through the big computer at work?"

"How many people will see it?"

"I can make sure we are the only ones that see it, and as soon as we are finished, I can wipe it from the computer completely. You can watch me do it if you'd like. We can make believe I'm giving you a tour of the place. Tomorrow is Sunday, and usually no one is working."

Delicious said, "Why don't we all go? I'll take Teddy, and it will look less suspicious."

"You are going shopping tomorrow with Roz and mom. I'll take Teddy with me, and the boys. That should drive all the agents crazy."

Delicious said, "I think that's a marvelous idea. What do you think Holden?"

"I like it, because it's sneaky like my dad."

"Okay, tomorrow is settled. Do you want help moving your stuff into the living room?"

"Yes please. Would you take the board that we worked on and bring it out here"?

"I would be honored."

In less than five minutes, the boys were back at work on their project, while Delicious and Gray were relaxing in bed. That's when the earthquake hit. Furniture started falling apart or at least it did in one room.

"Boys, are you alright?"

"Yes, nothing happened in here."

"Delicious come in here."

Gray was leaning against the dressing table when she entered the room. The crib was destroyed, but Teddy was sitting on her mattress having a ball.

"Babe before you get hysterical, and threatened to sue the company for a design flaw, look at what our daughter is playing with."

"Come on Gray, it's not possible."

"Do you want to lose $100?"

The one bet she had never lost was a $100 bet against anyone in her family or her friends. She lost one to her father, but she knew in her heart he cheated. She just couldn't prove it. Now her husband was betting that her tiny terror had taken a penny, and used it to unscrew four screws from her crib, and caused it to collapse.

"I will take your money any day of the week sweetheart."

"I'll take it out in trade, if you want?"

"What kind of trade did you have in mind?"

"You know what kind of trade I have in mind."

"Add 10 zeros to that initial offer and you have a prospect of getting there."

"Great, so it's no longer absolutely no on a religious basis. Now we are down to mere money."

"That's a hell of a lot of money for a piece of ass."

"I will never have to pay that amount for it. Now that your moral defenses are gone, all I have to wait for is the proper environment. For example, if we are the last two people on the planet, and only I can get to the food, you will willingly give up that portion of your body to me at any time, as payment for a meal."

"You wouldn't do that to me."

"Do you want to bet your ass on it?"

"Put the crib back together, I have to change my daughter."

"Yes dear."

"Pig."

"Yes dear."

She kissed him again. "It's not going to happen."

"Are you backing out of our bet dear?"

"Dream of it, while you're in stasis. It will be as close as you ever get to that particular orifice."

"I will smile the entire time."

"Doctor Grayson Thyme, you are impossible."

"Mrs. Delicious Thyme, if I wasn't, I would never have captured your heart, soul, or your delectable body."

Delicious screamed, "Teddy don't you dare swallow that screw!"

She removed it from her child's hand, checked her other hand, and checked her mouth just in case one was already in there.

Gray licked his wife's ear and whispered, "Our daughter is thinking about screwing already." He ducked and ran out of the room.

"Grayson, if Teddy or my mother doesn't get you for that, I surely will."

"Mommy toilet."

"Do you want me to carry you or do you want to walk?"

"I walk."

She did, straight to the bathroom, and began to unsnap the snaps that held her clothing together.

Delicious asked, "May I help you with those?"

"Berry hard, too far back."

"They put them so far back to keep brilliant children like you, from opening them. Soon, you would take it off, remove your diaper, and walk around the house naked."

"Grandma says I born like that."

"Ask grandma if she walked around naked. I know she didn't, and she's lying if she said she did."

"You are making grandma cry."

"I cried all the time when she died. Let's get you up on the toilet, so you can take care of your business."

While Teddy was doing her thing, Delicious prayed silently.

"Dear God please take care of my mother. I hurt her, and I didn't mean to do it. It was a mean spirited remark, and it should never left my mouth. I'm sorry, so, so, sorry. I will try harder to become a better person than I am."

"Finish."

"Good girl. Since you're going to have 'Messy Ghetti' for dinner, I'm going to put old clothes on you. You are going to have a bath afterwards, so do you want to wear a dress, or pants?"

"Pretty dress, ruffles, pink socks, lack shoes, big bib."

Delicious tickled her, and said. "Little monster, you are going to wear the biggest bib we have."

"Bib with arms go."

"What a wonderful thought. I didn't think of that one."

"I know."

"Please God, not another one. Gordon drove me crazy with that sentence."

Divine whispered in her daughter's ear, "I know."

"It didn't take you long to get even with me did your mom?"

"She told me what you said about becoming a 'different' person. I couldn't be prouder of you."

"I didn't say 'different', I said 'better' person."

"You could start by being nicer to your husband."

"I love him to death mom. He is the only reason I am sane."

"It's all the more reason for you to stop kicking, and hitting him, every time you lose your temper. My time is up, be good little girl, the Lord is watching over you, as am I."

"Mommy, are you alright?"

"Yes my love, grandma just paid me a visit. Would you like to get dressed now?"

"Yes please."

****************

126. Inner Space

Delicious and Rosalyn left Temple with their escorts at 10:30 AM, on their way to Austin for a girl's day out shopping with Jennifer, my beloved wife.

In our suite on the 21st floor of the Hyatt Regency, our telephone rang. Jennifer's hand came out from under the covers and reached for the receiver.

In a cheerful voice the recorded message said, "Good morning, this is your wake up call. It is 10:45 AM in the wonderful city of Austin. We wish you a great day."

Jennifer grunted. If the cord on the phone reached my side of the bed, she would have taken the handle, and beat me into sand.

Her head was pounding from our glorious meal the evening before. Well, it may not have been the meal, as much as the 2 ½ bottles of champagne she drank.

She drank champagne, while I drank water. She drank the champagne as if it was water. Now she was paying for it dearly. She tried courageously to walk out of the restaurant, but her feet couldn't find the floor. If I let go of her arm, she would have found it face first. It was safer for both for me to carry her to our room. We arrived a little after 11 PM. I laid her down on the bed, took off her clothes, put on her nightgown, covered her, and kissed her good night.

I went into the bathroom, stripped, took a wonderfully hot and relaxing shower, dried off, and returned to the room. Much to my surprise Jennifer's nightgown was on the floor, the covers were rolled down to the edge of the bed, and she was lying there naked waiting for me.

"I bet you didn't expect to see me awake, did you?"

"After all the champagne you drank tonight, I didn't expect to see you until Thursday."

"Very funny Even, get into bed, my head is pounding, and I want something else pounding into me now."

"It's very late, and you are getting company early tomorrow. You are going to need all the sleep you can get. Why don't we put this off until tomorrow night, and the rest of this week?"

"Even if you don't get in this bed and make love with me, I am going to rape you on the floor where you stand."

I rubbed by foot against the carpeting. "No, the carpet is too coarse. I choose the bed."

I climbed in, lay down on my pillow, but did not make a move towards her.

She punched me in the ribs. "Dammit, am I going to have to do everything myself tonight?"

"I've never been raped before. I want to know what it feels like."

She slid her body over the top of mine, and did things to me I hadn't read in any of my books through all my years of celibacy. We never stopped. We fell asleep through exhaustion. It was 4 o'clock in the morning, and I knew she would be in trouble later this morning.

As I watched her through the slits in my eyes, nothing in her body was working properly. Her eyes wouldn't open, because it was too bright in the room. I failed to close the drapes the evening before, because we got in so late, and after that, she distracted me until very early in the morning.

Finally, she sat up, grabbed her head, and groaned. "Oh God, what did I do to myself?"

She turned her hips, and allowed her legs to hang off the side of the bed. Hanging onto the end table, she pushed with both her arms into a standing position.

Her body swayed so badly I was getting ready to move over and catch her, before she fell. Thankfully, her grip on the end table was strong enough to prevent that from happening.

She turned back towards the bed, and using her hands to keep her stable, inched her way towards the end. She was now six feet from the dresser, and for her it may have well been a mile. I can't explain the position she was in well, but her hips and legs were facing the window^, her hands were on the edge of the bed facing>, and her face was looking at the dresser that way<. She looked like one of those reptilian's, whose eyes can move independently, only funnier.

However, the end result worked for her. She pushed off the end of the bed using her hands, she twisted her hips, and took a great stride with her right leg, moving it over her left, and pushed hard enough to reach the dresser.

I almost applauded her effort, and wanted her to repeat it. I would bet she couldn't remember how she did it.

Now all she had to do was creep down the eight-foot dresser, grabbed on to the bathroom door, open it, and relief was only a few feet away.

Slowly, she moved down the dresser. She was three feet away from the bathroom door, when she picked her head up to look in the mirror to see what she looked like.

I hopped out of bed walked towards her, kissed her good morning, went into the bathroom locked the door, and started the shower.

I am positive the people in Seattle heard her scream.

I took a very quick shower, but left the water running. I was brushing my teeth, while she was pounding on the door.

She screamed, "Even if you don't let me in there I'm going to pee in your shoes."

I opened the door and asked, "Did you say something dear; I couldn't hear you over the fan."

"You know I have to use the bathroom before you went in there. I'm suffering and you are taking your damn sweet time. I should kill you where you stand, and if you don't let me in there now I'm going to pee on your feet."

"You can't make it as far as my shoes anymore?"

She screamed again, pushed me aside, and slammed the door in my face.

I waited a moment and knocked on the door.

"What!"

"You do know this suite has a second bathroom don't you?"

"Now you tell me you son of a bitch."

"Didn't you read the fire evacuation plan?"

"Even go away, far, far, away."

"I'll order you breakfast first, and if that's what you want me to do, I will do it."

"Even leave me alone."

"Okay."

I went into our room, called room service, and ordered Jennifer's breakfast. I took out my best ensemble, and moved everything into the second bedroom. I lay down on the bed and wait for things to happen, as I knew they would.

Jen came out of the bathroom, and called my name. Naturally, I didn't answer.

This time she screamed at herself. "Why does that man always take me literally?"

She was having a wonderful loud conversation with herself, while she was dressing, doing her hair, and putting her makeup on. At any other time I would have walked into the bedroom and told her how much she owed the pretzel jar, but not today. Today I was going to let her suffer.

Shortly before noon, our security agent knocked on the door and told Jen breakfast was here. She opened the door, and both the server, and the agent came in. After the meal was set up on the table, they both exited the room.

She was probably just pouring her coffee, when the agent knocked on the door again.

"Mrs. Thyme and Mrs. Laver are here to see you."

Jennifer opened the door, and greeted both of them warmly.

"I just sat down to breakfast. I'll be a few minutes."

They both noticed it, but Delicious struck first.

"Jen, it feels as if it's been 100 years, since you did this to me, but I know it's only been a few. It delights me to say these words back at you. 'Okay, what did you do this time?"

"You little bitch; you had to use my own words against me."

"Start at the beginning, just like you made me do it."

"Even took me down to the restaurant last night, and we had a fantastic meal. We must have been there for two hours, talking and laughing. It was just wonderful. I don't think it was the meal, but the 2 ½ bottles of champagne that I drank that caused me to be a little testy this morning."

Roslyn said, "You drank 2 ½ bottles of champagne, and you were able to walk back to the room?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



"No, he carried me."

"Who said gallantry is dead. What happened next?"

"We got to the room a little before midnight. He undressed me, put my nightgown on, kissed me good night, and put me to bed."

"My dad sounds like a terrible person so far. Please continue the worm has to turn somewhere."

"I won't give you the details, but I woke up. When he came out of the bathroom, I was ready to go. He said no, because you two were coming today, and I needed all the sleep I could get because of all of the drinking I did. I told him if he didn't get to bed and make love with me I would rape him where he stood. He got into bed and lay still. I asked him if I was going to have to do all the work. He said he had never been raped before, and wanted to find out what it felt like. I showed him for the next four hours, until we both collapsed."

Roslyn said, "I still don't see a smoking gun."

"I got my wake-up call, and my hangover. I couldn't function properly and had to get to the bathroom. It took every ounce of strength I had in me to get from the bed to the bathroom. I was three feet away, when Even kissed me good morning, went into the bathroom, and took a shower. I screamed to the high heavens. I started pounding on the door. A few moments later, he opened it with a toothbrush in his mouth. He asked me if I needed anything and we proceeded to start arguing. Let me correct that. I started yelling at him, because I needed to use the bathroom."

Delicious said, "Jen, this is a suite. It has two bathrooms."

"I know that now, because your father told me. I didn't know it when I needed it."

"Didn't you read the fire evacuation plan?"

"Don't you start with me; I got the same lecture from your father."

"What did my dad do that you kicked him out?"

"That's the point, he didn't do anything wrong, I did. I told him to go away, far, far, away, and I don't know where he went."

I walked out of the second bedroom dressed to kill. I was in my finest outfit, including my shoes with tassels. Delicious and Rosalyn looked at me with their mouths open wide. Jennifer had to turn around to see what was going on.

"Even, thank God you're still here."

"No I'm not, I'm leaving. I'm following your directive. I'm going away, far, far, away. I'm not sure where I'm going, therefore I got dressed just in case it was someplace special. Goodbye everyone, have a wonderful day shopping."

I opened the door, closed it, and waited.

Jennifer sat there stunned.

Delicious yelled at her, "What the hell are you waiting for, go get him."

"He didn't even talk to me. How am I supposed to convince him to stay?"

Roslyn said, "Do I have to leave a red mark on your face as Grayson left on Delicious to get you moving?"

"No."

She got up so fast she knocked the chair over and ran for the door. She pulled it open, and ran right into me.

"Fancy meeting you here, weren't you supposed to go shopping?"

She was all over me, kissing and hugging me as if there was no tomorrow.

"You bastard, don't you ever do that to me again."

"Madam if you remember you did this to yourself. I wasn't the one that told me to go far away. This was as far as I wished to go. When I am married you, I promised I would never harm you or cheat on you. Do you remember those words?"

"Do you remember last night Even?"

"I believe I have amnesia. I think someone raped me, but I'm not sure."

"I am happy about that, because when I have in store for you later will absolutely blow your mind."

"I remember someone blew something last night, but it was not my mind."

"Get plenty of rest Even; you are going to need it."

"Go shopping Jennifer and buy beautiful things. I want to remember you just the way you are when we part."

"You son of a bitch, are you trying to ruin our day?"

"Not on your life or mine. I love you too much to do that to you. Be happy, and go shopping. I'm going to lunch, because I didn't have breakfast, and you are wasting time. The stores don't close until 6 o'clock, I don't expect you back until 6:30 PM. One minute before then, and I will spank you until your bottom is so red you won't be able to sit down for a week. By the way, you owe the cookie jar hundred and $170. I was counting while I was in the bathroom. You hold the record, not even Delicious comes close."

Delicious yelled, "Way to go mom!"

"Shut the fuck up in there."

"I can't wait to tell Gordon his mother is up to $180. If you reach $200 and he wins the pot, I can't imagine what he's going to say to his mother for the next week."

"If he opens his mouth to me, I will break his jaw."

"I will call Monty, and have her tell him what you said. He will become a monk for the next two weeks. Girls go shopping now. I'm going to lunch. Goodbye everyone have a great time."

With that disaster averted, we all rode down in the same elevator. I escorted the girls to the three SUVs, and their agents that would stay with them all day. When they saw me heading for the next set of SUVs Jennifer yelled, "I thought you were going for breakfast?"

"I am. I just didn't tell you where I was going for breakfast."

"You son of a bitch, you are going to work."

"Do you think I would go to work dressed like this?"

"You would go to work dressed like the Pope."

"You have cut me to the quick Jennifer. You go your way and be home by 6:30 P.M. I will be waiting for you."

"You better be, or I will have your nuts tied in a knot so tight you will beg for mercy."

"I believe I begged for mercy last night, and I didn't get it. Goodbye Jennifer, have a lovely day."

Our agents had their orders, and they would not disobey mine, even if Jennifer threatened them with death. The only place they would take them was shopping.

As soon as we made the turn out of the Hyatt Regency driveway, and headed for the highway to police cars took the lead. With lights and sirens blaring, we headed for Temple. It's amazing how fast 100 miles goes when you're doing 120 miles an hour. We asked the officers if they wanted to come in with us and see what the 22nd century would look like. They both accepted. It was their day off, and what we were paying them made their day extremely profitable.

As we entered the building, they had to leave their firearms with security. I didn't expect anybody to be in the building, but as I turned down towards my desk, Gray was sitting at his desk, with Newton, Richard, Holden, and Teddy.

I yelled, "Hello kids, have you invented anything to destroy the planet with yet?"

Teddy waddled towards me, as the other three ran, kissed me, and said hello."

Holden said, "No dad, we are not destroying the world, Uncle Gray is running the numbers we came up with for the Engineering section of my new spacecraft."

"You finished the Engineering section already? You don't have a computer big enough to run the numbers."

"I know the three of us did the rest of the numbers in our heads. Uncle Gray is running it through the big computer now to see if we got them right. Would you like to sit in, and watch them?"

"Only if you want me to look Holden. I know how secret you want your project to be. I would be honored to see it. If you don't want me to look at it, I will understand. You are an amazing son, and I could not be more proud of you. Richard has jumped amazingly in this past four months. He is catching up to all of you, and I love him just as much as I love you. Newton is exceptional, but I think you will all be equal in a short period of time. Our family names will go down in history because of what we have accomplished in such a short period of time."

Teddy said, "Up, want up."

"I think we can arrange that Teddy. Are the boy's numbers correct?"

"Yes, last engines too far."

"The last nuclear fusion engines are too far out."

"Yes, 27.

"27 inches, or 27 feet Teddy?"

"Smaller one."

"27 inches."

She nodded her head in agreement.

Holden yelled, "They are not, I did the numbers four times, and they are right where the supposed to be."

"Leg buckle."

"The elevator leg will buckle Teddy?"

"Too much, buckle in."

Holden said, "I'll bet you my ice cream that you are wrong."

"Banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup?"

"Yes."

"I get two, you get no?"

"Yes, but if you are wrong, I get two, and you get none."

"Okay."

"Let's see what Gray has to say about it."

"Doctor Luck" one police officer asked, "What are these kids talking about?"

"I don't want to scare you but the oldest one in this group is nine. The one I'm holding is a little bit more than one. They have designed the first floor of our next spacecraft. It is 1000 feet wide, and I am about to see for the first time what else they did to it. You have to stand back because this is extremely secret material."

"Your joking Doctor, these children are building a 1000 feet wide spacecraft, and what their putting into it is extremely secret? I can't believe it."

"My oldest son Richard tested out of high school at eight years old. My nephew Newton did it at six years old. We have just filed the paperwork for Holden, and he is going to blow the test wide open. My oldest son, Gordon, who is now 15 years old, saved NASA'S Orion project when he was five years old. Doctor Joseph Oyster of Caltech spent $600 million on that project and almost scrapped it because she could not get the mlli-Newton-thrusters to work properly. As a last resort, he asked me to take a look at it. Gordon and I spent a total of eight computer hours and six man-hours working on that problem and fixed it. 

Since we had the entire program, we went through it. We fixed everything that was wrong with their entire project. My daughter, Delicious, found five problems. Gordon went through it, and found seven. She chased him around the laboratory, and when she finally called him, she tried to tickle him to death.

If they sent those astronauts into space the way that program was working, the astronauts would have been dead before they passed the moon outbound, and no one would have known why.

We were at a meeting in New York, and the six astronauts and Doctor Oyster walked in. They brought a birthday cake for Gordon and personalized leather jackets for all of us. Gordon's jacket said 'Flash Gordon.' They thanked him and me for saving their lives. Never underestimate what a child can or cannot do. Kids like these are the future of the world. If you want proof of what I said, I will give you Doctor Oyster's phone number. He will gladly tell you what I said is true."

Gray called out, "Everyone get over here you have to see this."

Gray picked up Holden and showed him the numbers. "You didn't have a supercomputer to work with and you got everything correct. The three of you are absolutely amazing, congratulations."

"Holden turned to Teddy and said, "I get your ice cream."

"Gray, Teddy said there is too much stress on the outboard legs with the fusion engines. Would you run that again please?"

"Sure, give me a second while I load it up."

I asked, "Are you sure my little ticklish one?"

"Yes, two ice creams."

"You are going to turn into a bowling ball with all that ice cream."

"No, tall like daddy, mouth like mommy."

"Why couldn't you have a mouth like daddy, and be tall like your mommy?"

"No choice, God made. She funny sense of humor."

"She certainly does. Wait until I tell your father what you said. You are going to be so smart."

"Already am."

"I know, and I love it."

"Holy crap Even, Teddy is right. There would be too much stress on the outboard struts. They can't carry the load. They would buckle in. They have to be moved in..."

"Stop, don't say another word Gray. Teddy tell daddy how many inches they have to move the engine in."

"27 daddy."

"Teddy did grandma tell you that number?"

"She not speak to me today. She resting. I know answer myself."

"Even this is not even funny. When did she give you that number?"

"She told me about seven minutes ago. She and Holden made a bet over ice cream. Holden just lost. Teddy gets two ice creams; Holden gets none."

"Banilla ice cream chocolate syrup two times. Holden none."

"Tell daddy what else you told me."

"Should sit floor, no hurt himself."

"Gray, you have two choices, follow Teddy's advice, or hold on for dear life."

"How bad is it Even?"

"If I were you, I would sit on the floor."

Gray got off his chair, moved it clear of his desk, and sat on the floor.

"Go ahead Teddy tell daddy what God said."

"She funny sense of humor. I be tall like daddy, have mouth like mommy."

Gray lay down on the carpet put his hands together as if he was in prayer.

"Dear God, what did I do in my life to deserve this punishment? Wasn't marrying Delicious, and trying to make us into good people, and good parents enough? What am I going to do with this tiny little terror for the rest of my life? She is going to take over for my best friend, while we are in space. How are any of us going to survive with her as our leader? Please don't take Even away from us, I couldn't bear it."

Teddy said, "Daddy funny, make him copilot. He spank me, I spank him."

"Teddy it doesn't work that way. You have to learn how to be responsible for all the people on board the ship. You are their leader. Everyone will look to you for advice. It is a very hard job and you cannot have a temper tantrum, because you're angry with your parents. You are going to spend more time with me, in the beginning, than you are with them. What are you going to do if two people have a fight, and no one else sees it? You don't know who started it, or who is at fault. One person may be guilty, and the other is innocent. You can't put them both in jail because that would be unfair to the innocent party. How are you going to handle it? What would you do?"

"I no no yet. Must learn."

"That's right, and it takes time, it's not easy."

"Even I have the exact new number. 27.25 inches and not only that, it lines up everything perfectly for the cables. I hate myself. I think I'll go home and insult Delicious, and have her kill me."

"I'm sorry Gray, but Delicious is not at home. She is shopping with Roslyn and Jennifer."

"Would you watch the kids as I walk across the highway?"

"No I won't, because I would be an accessory to murder."

"Even what would you do if you had a 24-year-old Delicious and a one year old Teddy in your house?"

"I would do exactly what you are going to do Gray. Love them with all your heart, and protect them from them from all the evil that goes on around them. You can't help it; it's ingrained in your head, heart, and soul. Remember, God doesn't give you any more than you can handle."

"I think I will get rid of all the steak knives in the house, forks, and tools. Thank goodness we only have three more months left on Earth, I'm not sure I could take much more."

"Take my hand Gray; it's time to get back to work."

I lifted him up, and he kissed Teddy. "Little wonder you missed by a quarter of an inch."

"No, width of blade."

Gray looked at me, and shook his head. "Don't you love having two doctorates, and being wrong to a one-year-old."

The two police officers behind me laughed, and so did I.

"Einstein was wrong once."

Gray said, "Really?"

"Yes, he thought he made a mistake, but he was wrong."

"Even, sometimes you're a real bastard."

"That's why you get paid half $1 million year, and I get nothing."

The officer asked, "He gets paid half $1 million a year?"

"Yes, and he's underpaid. He is a brilliant scientist, and he's married to my daughter, who also gets paid the same amount as he does. They are both underpaid, because they are going to give their money to charity when they leave this planet. They also own half of the B&O railroad. Between Gray and his father, they own controlling interest in the railroad. I'm sure they will make some arrangement, because right now their stock is worth over $950 million."

"They have all this money, and they're leaving the earth to go explore the universe?"

"Many people that are going on this trip are worth billions of dollars, including me. I am leaving my money to my wife and my little one here. They are staying behind, because he is building the next ship. Holden's ship will be the first to travel the universe with paying customers on board, and will return to earth several years later. The amazing part is they have already finished laying out the hardest part, the engineering section. The other parts of the ship are easy. They will be the entertainment areas sleeping quarters, air conditioning units, and stasis units. The Best Luck, which takes off on Christmas Day, solved all those problems. Now Holden and his team will make a bigger, faster, and better spaceship than ours is. I wish I could be around to see it, but our flight is for discovery, to advance scientific knowledge, and transmit it back to earth. We will be so far away, it could take a generation for our messages to get back, but eventually it will get here, and be of use to the scientific community."

"I guess you guys are going to say someone's got to do it first, why not you. Isn't that correct?"

"If you look at the list of our investors, there are only 20 of them. Our spacecraft is going to come in close to budget and maybe even a little bit less. We estimated $340 Billion. When have you ever heard the government launch a rocket for that amount of money?

They are in the process of building their new Super Rocket, which they are calling, a 'Space Launch System'. It is still three years away from its first test. In three years, we will all be in stasis waiting to reach the first star system, with a possible livable planet. It will be 2024 or later before NASA takes a shot at getting to Mars. We hope and pray they get there safely, and return home the same way.

We have done our part to make that happen. Now it's up to the rocket, and that sucker is huge. The problem is it still uses hydrogen, with an oxygen exciter. We've already seen one spacecraft blow up before our eyes because something went wrong with a rubber seal. Our spacecraft is so far ahead of NASA, and they haven't asked us how we do it. 

They are still working on a $1 trillion system that can blow up before everyone's eyes, and kill people who have trained for years to go to Mars or another planet. It doesn't make any sense to me at all."

In September of 2024, our flight crew will awaken from stasis. If everything has gone correctly, we will be less than one week away from our intended planet. It will give us time to check the instruments, and help the medical crew as they awaken. They will help the others as they awaken. It is a timed sequence of eight per hour."

"Doctor, you don't leave anything to chance. You have a schedule for everything."

"When you are guarding a dignitary, you have the same protocol. Your heads are on a swivel looking for any threat he may encounter. You are on heightened alert every second. It's the same thing when you are in space. Everything has to go by the numbers. If you move one valve to early, and it ruptures, the whole ship could explode.

That's why it's computer-controlled, but there is always a man watching that computer. There is always another man down below in the engineering section close enough to handle any emergency that pops up. Computers are not infallible, and neither are humans. That's why they work together, hand-in-hand to get the correct outcome."

"Doctor Luck, this place is amazing."

"Jeff you have no idea what this place has done in the last six years. I promised my investors that 300 to 400 patents would come out of our work here before we were finished, and that the money they invested in this project would be paid back before we took off. So far, we have 678 patents approved, with seven more going through the process. Not only have our investors made their money back, they are in the plus column by hundreds of millions of dollars. You have never met a happier group of investors in your life."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



"Grandpa boring."

"I'm sorry Teddy, what would you like to do?"

"Banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup."

"I'm sorry little one, no ice cream until food."

"I cry."

"Your mommy used to cry for hours. I sat her in a corner facing the wall, until she stopped. Would you like me to do that with you?"

"Not fair."

"In the corner or food?"

"What kind food?"

"Oatmeal."

"splahscdhgdns."

"You don't like oatmeal?"

"Dog."

"No hotdog, you will choke. Do you like chicken?"

"Fries?"

"If you eat your chicken, you can have some French fries."

"Banilla ice cream chocolate syrup?"

"Whipped cream and cherries?"

"Yes, yes, yes, please."

"Come on gang it's time to eat."

"Hold on a moment Even, I have to wipe this from the memory of the computer. I told Holden I would do it."

"If you promised Holden you would do it, do it."

"Holden why don't you watch Uncle Gray, and see how it's done."

"Thanks dad, I'll be right back."

"Teddy toilet?"

"Okay."

"Do any of you gentlemen have to use the bathroom?"

Gray raised his hand.

"Does anyone else have to go? Remember it's a long trip to the restaurant."

Richard said, "Okay dad, we got your message. We are all going to the bathroom."

"What a wonderful choice. Uncle Gray will lead the way. He knows it so well."

"Teddy, I can't wait to you tell mommy what God told you. I think she's going to love you even more than she does already."

"Mommy say I special all time."

"You certainly are a sweetheart, and don't let anyone tell you different."

*****************

I was having such a great time with the kids, before I realized it; it was 5:15 PM

"Holy crap I have to leave. Why didn't you guys say anything?"

"We were going to give you five more minutes, and then we were going to grab you by the collar, and throw you in the car."

"Goodbye all, I see you next week."

The police cars were already in position as I jumped in to the back of the SUV. As soon as I buckled up, we were off. We hit every red light, but sirens will get everyone to stop, and let you through. In five minutes, we were on the highway heading towards Austin. I didn't look at the speedometer, because I didn't want to know. Everything was a blur. It seemed like moments later when the tires screeched to a halt.

We pulled up in front of the Hyatt at 6:15 PM. I thanked the officers, and gave them each $500 extra because they got me here before my wife would beat me to death. They thanked me, told me if I ever need their services again they would happily oblige.

I had my agent call upstairs to see if my wife was there already. I was told she was not. I got into the elevator with a great sense of relief. As I was approaching the room, the agent said good afternoon Doctor, but he couldn't look me in the eye. I had a feeling something was up.

Not being born stupid I said to Larry, "Come with me."

With great trepidation, he stood in front of me as I opened the door. I said nothing because no one was supposed to be in there. Holding on to the back of his jacket, we move slowly into the room.

Suddenly, from the right side, the three women popped out with industrial size cans of whipped cream and fired them in my direction. They were so enthralled with what they were doing they didn't realize they were soaking Larry to the bone with their whipped cream, and not me.

When their cans were empty Jennifer yelled, "I got you, you son of a bitch."

I popped out from behind Larry, dry as a bone and said, "You certainly did."

The three ladies screamed and charged at me. I used Larry as a shield, and every time they got close, they got whipped cream on themselves.

When they finally calmed down, I told Larry take the evening off. 

"Did we have fun this afternoon girls? It's 6:20 PM, and I am back early. You three are early, why is that? Did you have some evil plan cooked up for me?" 

"I didn't hear an answer Jennifer? Was this your idea of a joke? You knew I was wearing my finest outfit and you wanted to ruin it. Was this your idea my love?"

"No, it wasn't."

"Roslyn, I'm ashamed of you. I never thought you would do something like this to me. You did it to Rod, but he is your husband."

"No Even, it wasn't me either."

"Do you mean to say; no; it's not possible? She would never, on her worst day do something like that to her father. Would she? 

Delicious stop looking at the floor and look at me. It was you. Your eyes tell the tale. Why would you attack your father in his finest outfit?"

"I've never seen you strut like a peacock before dad. I wanted to take you down a peg, because of what you said to Jennifer. You looked so good in that outfit; it wasn't fair. Gray doesn't look that good, when he gets dressed up, and I was jealous."

"May I remind you of the night that you got dressed up, when you were only 17 years old. I almost did not let you out of the house, because your baby fat turned into muscle and your dress seem to have shrunk in all the wrong places. The only reason I allowed you out was because you were going with your future husband. He walked down the steps in black boots, black jeans, a white western styled shirt, and a black Western vest, and he topped it off with a cowboy hat. You got jealous that night too. You said to him, "The man is not supposed to look prettier than the girl."

He replied in a Western twang, "No one in the great state of Texas looks prettier than my lady."

"How do you remember all this stuff dad?"

"Because you're my daughter, and when it comes to my daughter, I remember everything."

She jumped out of her chair, and attempted to hug me to death, while she cried.

"If you and Gray want to go someplace fancy and play dress-up, you only have three months to do it. Don't put it off; your mom and I will always take care of the kids."

"Thanks daddy, maybe we will."

"Dallas is only 90 miles away, and with an escort, it's less than an hour away."

"Is that how you do it?"

"Is that how we do what dear?"

"Is that how you get from place to place so quickly?"

"Our drivers follow the speed limit all the time, just ask them."

"Our guys would jump into an ocean filled with sharks for you."

"I would certainly hope not, that would be exceedingly dangerous."

"Dad you are so full of crap."

"It's time for you to go home. Remember to ask Teddy what God said to her just before she was born. She told me and I told her to tell daddy. She told me to have him sit on the floor; otherwise, he would hurt himself. I told Gray he had two choices get on the floor or hold on real tight. He asked my opinion, I told him to get on the floor. He asked me if it was really as bad as it seemed. I think that's as far as I will go. Sit on something soft, and have Gray hold Teddy when she tells you. It was the funniest thing I have ever heard."

"Dad that's not fair, you can't do that to me."

"Who tried to shoot me with whipped cream?"

"Okay, Roz were leaving."

"Baby, after Teddy tells you, call Roz and let her know what she said. Do not call my wife that is her punishment for getting involved in this treachery."

"Even, you may not live, unless I get a phone call."

"It solves the problem with the divorce."

Delicious yelled, "What divorce?"

"My wife threatened to divorce me this morning, among many other things. Some of them were very painful."

I locked the door, and I began walking back to living area. I removed my jacket and saw Jennifer blocking my path. I moved around the dining table, but she moved to block my path again.

"Is there something I should know dear?"

"Where were you today?"

"I was with my son, children, and my grandchildren. If you want proof of that, you can call Gray. Why am I being interrogated? Have I done something wrong?"

"You got all dressed up to go see your grandchildren?"

"No, I got dressed up to piss you off. From your reaction, I would say it worked. I was back on time. Actually, I was 10 minutes early. Would you like to check my underwear for stains, or lipstick? I thought we settled that before we parted."

"I'm acting foolishly aren't I?"

"Do you think you are? If you have any doubts about where I have been, call your sons and speak to them. They are at the ages they don't know how to lie, and they definitely would not lie to their mother. 

Holden had a bet with Teddy about the rear struts with the nuclear engines. Holden said they were in the right position. Teddy said the struts would cave in because there was too much pressure on them. Teddy said they had to be moved in 27 inches towards the center. The bet was over ice cream. Teddy wins she gets his. Holden wins he gets hers. Gray ran the numbers through the computer a second time and found Teddy was correct. Holden was not happy, but it wasn't about the ice cream."

"Are you hungry Even?"

"I could eat."

"Here or downstairs?"

"As always it's your choice."

"It's safer for me up here, I want to order champagne."

"You have nothing to do tomorrow. You can drink all the champagne you want, and sleep the day away tomorrow. Beside that you also know there's a second bathroom in this apartment."

"I could have killed you this morning."

"You should've read the fire escape plan."

"What is it with you and Delicious and fire escape plans?"

"Do you know the fastest way to get out of this building?"

"Yes, look for the exit signs."

"If the fire just happens to be between you and the exit sign, where is the next one?"

"I have no idea."

"My dear that is the reason you read the fire escape plan. You are 21 floors up, and as you have told me, if you jump you are not going to bounce."

Jen came to me, kissed me, and put her head on my chest. "I'm sorry; I don't know what got into me today."

"I do. Two and half bottles of champagne, five and half hours of sleep and a headache when you woke up this morning. Then you picked a fight with me this morning. I should have ended it, but I didn't, which only made it worse for you. Now you are extremely tired, and what you need is sleep. What you are going to do is get naked, take a long hot shower, and get into bed. I will order dinner at 9 o'clock. When it gets here, I will wake you up. After I finished my dinner, I will take a long hot shower and go to bed. Does that sound good?"

"We will talk about that last part later, but I agree with the first part. I'm going to take a shower and go to sleep."

"Shall I join you in bed?"

"If you do, I'll never get any sleep."

"Oh well, I guess I'll watch television."

"Thank you, Even; you have no idea how tired I am."

Jennifer went into our bedroom, stripped, and took a long hot shower.

Being the sneaky bastard I am, I left a note on her pillow.

"Dearest, I realized I was tired also. In order to keep my promise not to go to bother you while you are in bed, I am going to sleep in the second bedroom. I have set the alarm for 9 o'clock. I will call for dinner at that time. Sleep well my love, I will dream only of you. 'Odd or Even'

When I signed a card, or sent her a letter with that salutation, when I was out of town, she always laughed. That was not the reaction I was hoping for this time.

Jennifer walked out to the bathroom with a towel wrapped like a turban on top of her head. She went towards the bed for the nightgown she laid out, and saw my note laying against her pillow. She read it, smiled, and laid it on the end table. She finished drying her hair, and got into bed.

She lay there restlessly, turned on the end table light, and read the note one more time. She tried to convince herself I was going to sleep. She was sure I wanted her to go to sleep. Then she gazed at the end of my note "Odd, or Even"

She sat up and screamed, "That lying son of a bitch. He's in there waiting for me. He can wait until hell freezes over. I'm not going."

She laid back down facing the wall waiting for me to show up. Five, ten, fifteen minutes past, and her blood pressure was setting new records.

"If he's awake, he is going to be chopped up into little pieces, and served in salads for the next month."

Surreptitiously, she crossed from her bedroom to mine. I was lying there making the little noises I make while I sleep. 

She thought, "He couldn't possibly know he makes those noises while he sleeps."

She felt guilty again for doubting me. She was about to close the door when I groggily said, "I can smell your presence Jennifer. What do you need? Are you hungry?"

"No, I was lonely. I missed you in my bed. I thought you might be awake, and I could join you, but you were sleeping peacefully. I'm sorry I woke you."

"Would you like to join me here, or should I join you in our room?"

"I'll join you."

"You look very beautiful tonight, my love. Three wonderful children and no one could ever tell."

"You are a liar Doctor Luck, but I'll take any compliments I can get."

"Jen have you ever taken the time to look at yourself in a full-length mirror? They don't lie. You are the most beautiful woman God ever created. How I was the lucky man to meet you, fall in love, and marry you. I will never know, but I thank God every day for you."

"Even, if you don't stop this, I'm going to cry."

"Why would you cry over the truth? If you said no, we would be living in the deep woods of Alaska, with 10 children, living off the land. I never would have let you go. I loved you from the moment I looked into your sparking black eyes on the airplane. Come here, and let me hold you. We will fall asleep that way."

Although initially I had other plans, that's what we did. We spooned, and I held my wife tight to my body. At 9 PM, I received my wake-up call. I went into the living room, and ordered dinner. Her meal would be a surprise, and I ordered an alternate one for her just in case she balked on the primary one.

There was a knock on our door just before 10 PM, and I was told dinner was here. Our agent walked in with our server, to make sure nothing untoward happened. As soon as the table was set and everything removed, I went to wake my lady up. It was not an easy task.

Finally, I said, "Jennifer, I am holding a bucket of ice water directly over your head. In 15 seconds, you are going to be the coldest naked woman on this planet. As always, the choice is yours. I'm counting: 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4..."

"Don't you dare drop that on me, I am up. I am sitting up. Now I am standing up. Are you happy now?"

She turned, and looked at me. "Where is your bucket of ice water?"

"It's in your mind. As long as you thought I had it, you moved like the wind. Otherwise, I would have had to use harsher methods. I don't want dinner or you to get cold. Would you like to put your nightgown on, or are you going to eat eau natural?"

"Which would you prefer Even?"

"I could look at you like this forever, and never get tired."

"Then this is the way I'm eating dinner."

She sat down, and I pushed her chair in. I took a napkin and placed it across her lap. I took a bib and tied it around her neck.

"Even, this sort of ruins the view."

"I know dear, but you do not know what I ordered you for dinner."

"This should be very interesting."

"I am happy I am on the other side of the table, with a floral arrangement in the center. I am going to give you your plate covered, but you cannot open it until I sit down. Agreed?"

"Is it alive?"

"No, I checked, it is definitely not alive. They are cooked to perfection."

I put her plate in front of her, and hurried to my side of the table.

"What did you get Even?"

"Atlantic salmon, served on the bed dirty rice. Asparagus with hollandaise sauce and for dessert Banilla ice cream with chocolate syrup. You may open yours now dear."

With great trepidation, she tipped over the aluminum cover until she could see what I ordered for her.

She screamed, "Prawns, you are finally letting me have prawns?"

"I was thinking of you, when you went shopping today. You have one week to recover, if they are bad. I can nurse you back to health by having sex with you every day, in every way, and you will have no way to stop me."

"We have had sex in every way, every day since we got here. What would my being sick have to do with it?"

"I've never had sex with a sick woman before. It would be a first for me."

"You idiot, everything you do with a woman is new for you."

"Oh yes, I forgot about that."

"Lame brain, thank God, you're a genius; otherwise, you would cut your hands off. Come to think of it you never told me what Teddy told Gray." 

"I will not tell you, because that is part of your punishment."

"Even how much shit do you want to be in tonight?"

"How high can you bite?"

"High enough to reach your carotid artery."

"If Delicious calls in the morning, and she doesn't know yet you must not tell her."

"Okay Even, tell me what Teddy said."

"Move back from your meal. Trust me this is important, otherwise it will be all over you."

"Is this far enough?"

"Yes. Teddy told me, and I quote, 'God have funny sense of humor. I be tall like daddy, have mouth like mommy."

Jennifer fell off her chair laughing. "Holy shit, poor Gray; what is he going to do with the two of them on board a tiny spaceship?"

"Babe, my first thought was him jumping out as we were passing Heliopause. The only problem is Teddy would tattle on him, and Delicious would not let him get away with it. She wouldn't want to be left alone with Teddy."

"Hell, neither would I. When did God tell her this?"

"Teddy said just before she was born."

"If you believe the Scriptures, that's when She gives us a soul."

"In Gray and Delicious case, she gave our Teddy, a sense of humor then too."

"May She give them the wisdom to raise her properly."

*************

"The house is still here; what is broken inside?"

"If you keep yelling like that, you are going to wake up the children."

"Bullshit, you have never been able to put our two kids to sleep at one time. Now you expect me to believe you put all four of the kids to sleep by yourself."

"Bathe, brushed, and bed, you can check for yourself."

Delicious walked down the hallway looking for a trap. Every time she opened a bedroom door, she found a sleeping child. She walked in, kissed the sleeping boy good night, and moved on to the next room.

Then she came to her terrors room. She was lying on her back, playing with her blanket, not bothering anyone.

Delicious walked over to her and asked, "What are you doing awake?"

"Too many cherries."

"Does your belly hurt?"

"Yes. Toilet very soon."

"I think I will take you there now."

"Yes."

Delicious barely had her settled on the seat, when Teddy exploded.

Delicious turned on the bathroom fan.

She laughed. "Stinky Teddy."

"No cherries."

"Was it the cherries, or too much ice cream?"

"Grandpa, chicken, French fries, one banilla ice cream whipped cream cherries. No more."

"You had dinner, before you had ice cream."

"Everyone, daddy too."

"Tummy better now?"

"Still hurt."

"Do you want mommy to rub it?"

"Come out wrong end."

"It is going to come out your mouth?"

"Yes, now."

Delicious grabbed a towel and put it under Teddy's chin. It seemed to her that everything Teddy had eaten since she was born came out.

"Gray get in here."

Gray sauntered in and was about to ask what Delicious needed, when he saw what was happening.

He ran to the linen closet and grabbed three large bath towels. He threw two on the floor, and one on the vanity. Then he proceeded to strip.

"What are you doing Gray?"

"I'm doing the correct ecological thing."

He opened the shower door, turned on the water and waited for it to become the correct temperature. When it was, he removed Teddy from Delicious arms and took her into the shower with him. He removed her clothes and began to wash her.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



Teddy was not at all thrilled with this new sensation. She was used to a nice warm bath in her little tub. She was not sure if she liked these little pinpricks that were hitting her all over. She watched her daddy blow bubbles into the water, so she tried it too.

Her daddy laughed at her, and did it again.

She laughed at her daddy, and he did it again. It became a game, and sometime during the game, they both got clean. Wasn't that funny?"

Gray took her out of the shower and wrapped her in the bath towel that was on the vanity. He carried her into her room, closed the door, and dressed her for bed.

"Are you feeling better now Teddy?"

"Little better."

"Remember, if you want mommy or daddy during the night, just talk into the blue box. We will hear you in our room. Okay?"

"Okay, see later."

"Good night my love."

"Night daddy."

He went into his room, grabbed his bathrobe, and returned to the bathroom to help clean it up. He found Delicious had nearly completed the job.

"I know you are almost finished babe, but would you like me to do the rest?"

"No, I have got it. There is one thing you can do for me."

"Name it, and it is yours."

"Take me into the shower and wash me like you did Teddy."

"I can do a better job on you, than I did on Teddy. I will even help you take your clothes off."

"Do not do it in the shower, these are dry clean only."

"Mrs. Thyme, why do you ask me to do the most difficult jobs, in the most difficult way?"

"It is a test of your manual dexterity."

Gray turned on the water and said, "Baby, you will be naked and wet in thirty seconds."

"You will not be able to find the zipper on my skirt in thirty seconds."

"$100 says you are wrong."

"You have bet. Who is going to keep time?"

"I am, of course."

"If you cheat, you are not getting paid or laid."

"Madam, I am getting laid; in the shower."

"Sir, you seem very sure of yourself. You may begin, but count out loud so I can hear you cheating."

Gray started counting as the buttons on her blouse flew all over the bathroom. Her blouse and bra were off before he got to five. He swung Delicious around so quickly she had to grab the wall to maintain her balance. He found the button on the skirt, and lowered the zipper before he got to twelve. Her skirt panties and shoes were off before he hit fifteen. He pulled her into his arms, and pulled her into the shower. Twenty seconds had elapsed.

"My dear, you have lost your first $100 bet."

"I have not, you cheated. You ruined my blouse. It is unwearable."

"You are just saying that to keep from paying me."

"You buy me a $170 silk blouse, and I will pay you your $100."

"I will take it. It will mean you lost a $100 bet, and I can tell everyone I beat you."

"Men, all they want is bragging rights."

"I cannot wait until the morning when Teddy tells you what God said to her before she was born."

"What did She say to her? Dad told me to sit on something soft, but did not tell me what was said."

"I would tell you, but it is much better coming from Teddy. No more talking now, I have to get you squeaky clean. Shall I do your hair also?"

"Yes please."

Tenderly, he washed her hair from root to tip. He rinsed off the soap, massaged her scalp with his nails, as she leaned back into him, and moaned. After what seemed like an epoch, he added shampoo, and washed and rinsed her hair again. He added conditioner to her hair and turned off the water.

"What are you doing?"

"The instructions say it has to stay on your hair for 3 to 5 minutes. I know something that will while away the time."

Having said that, his lips attached themselves to a nipple and began to nurse.

Delicious breasts were still sensitive since Teddy's birth, and her hands held his head where it was.

Gray's right hand traveled to Delicious center, spread her puffy lips, and rubbed the hood of the little warrior that was resting inside. It took less than a minute for the warrior to appear, and it was red, inflamed, and ready for battle. Gray's mouth left her breast, and headed south. One at a time, he took Delicious legs and put them over his shoulders. He tormented her by kissing the inside of her thighs, as he worked his way towards his goal. She could not hold out any longer, she screamed, and gushed her fluids all over his face.

He was about to renew his attack when he heard a knocking on the bathroom door.

"Mommy, daddy, toilet."

Delicious laughed. "That will teach you a lesson. Do not torment me."

"How the hell did she get out of her crib?"

He put his robe on, opened the door, and there she was, sitting on the floor waiting for them

"I talk in blue box. You not answer."

"I was washing mommy's hair, Teddy that is why I didn't hear you. Let's get you to toilet."

Gray sat her down and Teddy said, "Fan."

"You want daddy to turn on the fan?"

"Mommy say 'Stinky Teddy" and with that, Teddy exploded again, and again.

Gray asked, "Is it going to come out your mouth little one?"

"No, belly empty. No cherries."

"It could have been the chicken. I will call the restaurant tomorrow to see if they had any other complaints."

"Good, like cherries better chicken."

"Your body needs chicken, more than it needs cherries."

"Finished."

As he was getting ready to put her back in her crib, Gray asked, "How did you get out of the crib Teddy?"

"Easy." 

"Show me how you did it."

He watched her in awe, and in fear. She was like a little acrobat, putting one foot on the rear rail of the crib, and using both hands to lift herself up to straddle the headboard. She held on as she brought a leg over, and lowered herself onto the dressing table. She crawled to the end, and used the openings between the drawers to climb down to the floor. When she was standing on the carpet, she turned to her father, raised her arms in the air, and said, "See daddy, easy."

"You are going to cause your father a heart attack Teddy."

"Not only your father a heart attack little girl, but your mother also. I think you deserve a spanking for what you just did."

"Why, I do no wrong."

"Go ahead dear, and argue with that answer."

"You do not think two heart attacks is enough reason for a spanking?"

"Do you believe she knows how frightened we were when she did that little mountain climbing trick?"

"No."

"Why should she be spanked if she did not know?"

Delicious said, "Come here Teddy."

"No spank me."

"No, I am not going to spank you."

"Okay, I come you." She waddled from her crib to her mother's arms.

Delicious kissed her, open mouth to open mouth. "Do you know how much mommy loves you? Mommy would never hurt you, unless you were very bad, and you have not been very bad for a long time. What you did tonight was very, very, bad. You must not do it again. It frightens mommy and daddy to see you do something like that. I know you had to go to the toilet. I would rather you make a mess in the crib, then fall off the table and hurt yourself. Do you understand that I am trying to protect you from getting hurt? Do you understand how precious you are to your father and me? We would cry, and cry, and cry if you were to hurt yourself. We would not know what to do without you that is how much we love you."

"Nothing happened to me mommy. God say I grow up be tall like daddy, have mouth like you."

Delicious screamed, "WHAAA..."

Gray caught them both before Delicious hit the floor.

"Hold mommy's hand Teddy, I will be right back."

He ran to the kitchen, pulled a bottle of cold water from the refrigerator, and wet a towel to put under her neck. By the time, he returned to Teddy's room, the boys were kneeling by Delicious' body.

Newton asked, "What is the matter with mom, daddy?"

As he put the cold compress under her neck, he said to his son, "Do you remember what happened to me this afternoon at work?"

"Do you mean the part when you were on the floor?"

"Yes, that is the part I mean. Do you see where your mother is now? Teddy just told her the same thing, and your mother had the same reaction I had."

"Am I allowed to ask what Teddy said?"

"I believe you just did. Teddy, tell your brother what God said to you."

"God have very funny sense of humor. She say I be tall like daddy, have mouth like mommy."

Newton started to laugh, and so did his cousins.

"Dad, I think that is the funniest thing I have ever heard."

Delicious said, "I am going to kill my son. If his sense of humor is like God's sense of humor, I have to kill him."

"Before you go around killing people dear, drink some of this, it will make you feel better."

"What could possibly make me feel better? My daughter just told me she is going to be tall like you, and have a mouth like mine. I hate my mouth, and I am trying desperately to change it. Now I am going to have a daughter that speaks as I do. Can I have some hemlock, or cyanide, please? Give me any drug that is guaranteed to kill me quickly so I will not have to deal with two of me."

Teddy climbed on her mother's chest and said, "No worry, I help you."

Tears formed in Delicious' eyes. "How are you going to help me baby, when most of the time I cannot help myself."

"God say Easy. You, me be fine."

"I love you Teddy."

"I love my mommy."

"It is time for you to go to sleep; otherwise you are going to be tired tomorrow."

"It tomorrow already, but I sleep. Belly much better. Bad chicken."

"I will call the restaurant tomorrow and complain. Everyone back to bed, tomorrow you three can start working on the second level of the spacecraft."

**************

127. Traffic Court 

"Sandra Finch, please rise an approach the bench."

"Melvin Purcell representing Ms. Finch your honor."

"Mel, what the hell did they do to get you out of Texas?" 

"They are paying me an ungodly amount of money."

"That will do it every time. How does the defendant plead?"

"Not guilty your honor and we request an expedited trial."

"Does the district attorney have any problem with that request?"

"No your honor, how soon do you want to start?"

"Monday of next week is fine with me."

"Will you have enough time for discovery?"

"I probably won't need it, but I'll gladly take it."

"My calendar is full on Monday. We can start Tuesday afternoon at 1 o'clock if that is agreeable to both of you?"

"Yes your honor."

"Yes from us to Your Honor."

"Is there a request for bail?"

"Bail your honor? Miss Finch is an outstanding member of the community. She donates time to the underprivileged at three charity centers every week. She is no flight risk, and has two children in local schools. Where do you think she's going?"

"Your honor, it's not that we're worried that she is going somewhere, but that she is going to drink and drive again. She nearly killed two people the last time she got behind the wheel of a car. Her blood alcohol test was so high; it should have incapacitated her."

"Your honor that is exactly what we are going to prove in court."

"Miss Finch, your driver's license is temporarily suspended until this trial is over. It will not go on your record unless you are found guilty."

"Thank you Your Honor. I have stopped driving. My parents are picking up my children at school temporarily, and I have suspended my charity work until this situation is straightened out."

"This court is adjourned."

"El, if I were you I would check with the bartender at the country club. Ask him what Sandra was drinking that night. I have her receipt, and you are not going to like what she was drinking. Someone spiked her drinks. I think some guy was trying to get into her pants, and failed."

"How sure are you of this Mel? We can save the court a lot of time, and expense if you're right."

"She was drinking Perrier all night, and danced with two men mostly. One is a regular, the other shows up now and again. They say he is a Doctor from Massachusetts. It could explain the Valium. However, if he is a real doctor, he could have given her something much stronger, or faster acting. There is also the possibility he is a fake."

"Do you feel like taking a ride at government expense?"

"Hell no, you come with me, I rented a Mercedes."

*****************

Friday morning, at the District Attorney's office Sandra Finch, Melvin Purcell, and the District Attorney, El James, sat down for an informal talk. El said to Sandra, "Nothing you say today can or will be used against you. This is all off the record. I have already signed the documents and given them to your attorney. I just want you to verify some things we found out over the past two days.

"First, did you have any alcohol the night of the accident?"

"As God is my witness Mister James, I did not. I only had Perrier. I never drink when I am going to drive. Wait, that is not true. Sometimes I will have one drink with a meal if I'm going to drive. I will have one glass of wine with dinner, but that is all."

"Second, did you feel at all impaired when you started to drive home?"

"No I didn't. Everything felt normal. My reflexes were fine, my eyes were clear, the only thing I found unusual is I did not see the sign for the turn coming up. When I see that sign I automatically downshift to keep the car under control going around it."

"Third. How fast were you going?

"On the straightaway I was going about 120 miles per hour. That's nothing unusual going down that road. Everyone uses it as a racetrack. It's the sign that saves us all. Everyone downshifts as they pass that sign, so they can ease into the turn at between 35 and 40 miles per hour without any problem. There are no speed limit signs, and the road is in good shape. No one else ever uses it, because it doesn't go anywhere."

"Fourth. How fast do you think you were going when you make contact with the Lincoln?"

"A decent guess would be between 60 and 70 miles an hour. That car was lit up like a Christmas tree, but there was no way I could have missed it at that speed. I feel horrible about the two people inside it."

"Fifth. Were you awake when the car hit you from behind?"

"I was just coming out of a daze, when I got hit. I went unconscious again. I didn't wake up again, until the EMT's helped me out of the car."

"Sixth. How did you feel when the nurses were caring for you at the hospital?"

"I was totally out of it. I was uncoordinated. I could not speak properly. I could not follow the simplest instructions. I have never felt that way before, and I hope never to feel like it again."

"Mel, I agree with you, someone tampered with this young woman's drinks. Whatever the person used didn't get into her system quick enough. Sandra, criminally you are going to be excused, because this accident was not your fault. Someone drugged you, with the intent of doing you bodily harm. I will make the motion in front of the judge, and he will approve it. Your driver's license is reinstated. If I were you, I would watch the company I keep for a while.

That is the good news. The bad news is you are still civilly responsible for the accident. I would expect the Trevelyan's to have a lawyer visit you very soon. The car was in your parent's names. The amount they are going to sue you for could be in the $100's of millions. Their uncle is one of the richest men in the world, so you can expect lawyers that get paid thousands of dollars an hour to represent his nephew and his wife. The one thing you should be grateful for is the baby did not die. Then you are looking at constitutional issues before this settles."

"What you're saying Mister James is this could bankrupt my family."

"It could not only bankrupt your family, it could put them in debt for 100 years. Mister Zabo has the money to do it. He may pass away, but his sons will take over for him and continue the lawsuit. There is no escaping this man. Tell your father to try to settle for a very high number as soon as possible. Do you agree Mel?"

"I would get away from that man's jaws as soon as possible. He is a smooth operator, and a very nice man, but he is the biggest shark in the ocean, and you do not want to lock horns with him."

"I will tell my father what you both said. You will be seeing my father and mother this afternoon Mister Purcell isn't that correct sir?"

"Yes I will Sandra."

"Please explain to them what they are up against. Sometimes they are very hardheaded."

"If they don't listen this time, they could be cleaning toilets at McDonald's."

************

As they drove up to Sandra's parent's home, a huge black limousine was sitting in the driveway. As soon as they exited the car, three very well dressed men exited and walked towards them.

Mel said, "Oh my God not them."

Sandra asked, "Who are they?"

"They are William's attorneys from New York. He means business, really big business."

"Hello Thomas, long time no see."

"Melvin, what has happened to your girlish figure?"

"I'm afraid it's too many Texas barbecues. This is my client Sandra Finch. She was just declared innocent of all charges in the accident with your client. It appears someone spiked her drinks in an attempt to have his way with her."

"Hello Ms. Finch, my name is Thomas Shackleford. The two men with me are James Hurst, and Vincent Caruso, both are partners in our firm. I'm happy to hear that you were not criminally negligent and will not be charged in this incident. 

However, I'm sure Mister Purcell has already told you that your parents are Civilly Liable for all damages to Mister and Mrs. Trevelyan, and their vehicle, because your vehicle was in there name. Vincent if you would."

"Ms. Finch, this is a summons for you to appear for a deposition two weeks from Monday to give testimony in regards to your actions regarding this accident. You may have an attorney with you and anything you say will be recorded, and can be used in a court of law against your parents."

Purcell said, "Aren't you rushing things a little bit Thomas?"

"You know who I work for Melvin. He wanted me to serve papers the day after the accident. I had to beg him to give me time to get his great-niece out of the hospital first so I knew what I could bring charges on. My ear is still ringing from what he told me to do to myself if I didn't get those kids $3 billion."

"$3 billion, with no deaths or permanent injury? You have to be kidding me Thomas."

"When have you known William Zabo to joke when it comes to money?"

"Is there any wiggle room especially since someone tampered with Sandra's drinks?"

"If Lucy Trevelyan had lost her baby, William would have asked for the death penalty. Make an offer, and I will explain the circumstances to him. I will put him on speaker, and be four offices away when he answers me."

"Have you spoken to the Trevelyan's about this?"

"Rory and Lucy have no say in this matter. What William tells them is what they will do. He is so looking forward to having a great, great, grandnephew, he is giving the kids a private island in the Caribbean, a chalet in Switzerland, a villa in Italy, and estate on Hawaii, and an apartment in New York. Oh, I forgot, he is also giving them $4 billion. These kids don't need the money. William wants revenge from the people who hurt them. Do you have any idea why they are up here?"

Sandra said, "The only thing I know is they brought up $150 million in cash to purchase something."

"Rory will not leave Lucy's side now because of her relapse. A jet is on standby in Burlington, just in case they have to fly her to Boston. Vincent will take over for him to dole out the money to the Indian nations. Our people found what appears to be a nearly endless source of one of the two things you cannot live without. We have nearly finalized the deal, and are in the process of buying the rights to it from the Indian tribes. They don't realize what it is, or how precious it will be in the near future. They see it every day, and they take it for granted. It may take 20 years before it is needed, but William is always thinking ahead of the curve. $150 million will turn into $1.5 Trillion by then. His sons and heirs will have more money than the U.S. Treasury."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



Mel said, "Water, your people found water and you expect it to pay off?"

"I love the way you said that Mel. Another doubter; California has one year of drinking water left. The Southwest is ready to turn back to the dustbowl era of the 30s. Climatologists are predicting rapid changes in climate due to rising heat levels across the continent. New York reservoirs are 30 percent lower than they ever have been. Atlanta nearly went dry two years ago; and you say to me WATER. Our people estimate there is more water down there than the Oglala had in its infancy. The only reason no one found it before, is no one was looking for water. They were all looking for oil and gas reserves. If they didn't find either one of them, they moved on. William has people looking for everything that can make money, and we stumbled on this just at the right time. How much do you pay for a bottle of water Mel?"

"That's not the point, what happens to your money if it starts to rain like the flood?"

"What is $150 million to William Zabo? However, that's not going to happen, and what is going to happen, is he or his sons are going to be so wealthy governments are going to be frightened of them."

"Will you accept the summonses for Maude, and Harold Ames, Mel?"

"Since I'm their attorney, I can do that. You are asking for $350 million from each of them Thomas?"

"You should be thankful they didn't have Sandra's name on the title to the car. Otherwise, like the next two defendants we would be asking for it from all three of them. Remind them what happens when we have to take a case to trial. William will not take one penny less than the stated amount. I have no leeway in that case at all. If it is $600 million, their check is going to be for $600 million and not one penny less. Have a good day Mel."

"You to Thomas."

******************

As she walked in the door, Sandra said hello to her parents, without much feeling in her voice. She went to see her children.

Mel Purcell greeted them more warmly.

"Mister and Mrs. Ames, we have to talk. Those men outside were lawyers for the Trevelyan's, but actually they were lawyers for their great uncle, William Zabo. I know the man well, so listen to what I have to say to you."

Maude said, "Why don't we go into the living room where we can be more comfortable. Would you like a coffee, or something stronger?"

"No, I'm fine thank you."

"Tell me Mister Purcell, how much are they asking for?"

"First let me tell you that Sandra has been found not guilty of any crime in this matter. Someone spiked her drinks, while she was at the club. All she had that night was sparkling water. It was verified by the bartender, and the people she was sitting with, while she was not dancing. It is the only reason I believe we may have a little wiggle room in dealing with Tom Shackleford, James Hurst, and Vincent Caruso.

Tom and Jim have been in business for the better part of thirty years, and they have yet to lose one case. Vincent is the newcomer. It is said that he paid $100 million to become a partner in that firm. That was nine years ago, and he has not lost a case yet. I am not talking about little trials; I am talking about trials against the US government, multinational corporations, and even other law firms that have netted them, in fees alone, more than $100 million. They are not a good law firm, they are the very best there is.

"The car is in both your names. You are both being sued for $350 million. That comes to $700 million, and before you ask me if they are joking, William Zabo does not joke when it comes to money. If the baby died, there is no telling what he would have done, or the lengths he would have gone through to get all three defendants put in jail for life.

He would have dragged you through every court in the land, including the Supreme Court, if necessary, to get a decision on the fetus. You can't possibly outspend him. He owns newspapers, and magazines, so you cannot out advertise him. No politician, who wants to get reelected, would talk against him. If he wants a piece of legislation passed, between him and his friends, it will be passed. So this is my advice to you, and if you take it, I will cut my fee in half, because my aggravation level will go down by half.

I am suggesting you make an offer of $400 million, payable within thirty days. That is a savings to you of $300 million if they take it; and that is a big if. Thomas has to get that by William Zabo, and that man does not need your money. As Tom said to me outside, he is looking for revenge because you hurt his nephew, niece, but the most important his progeny. This couple has waited ten years to get pregnant, and when they told him it happened he was dancing on air."

"I am going to have to get rid of most of my portfolio."

"What would you have to do if it was $700 million?"

"I would have to sell everything, and I mean everything."

"There is your choice. You can have something left if they take it, or have nothing if you hold back. If you give me permission to call them now, we can strike while the iron is hot and try to get you out of this thing with some money left over, and a little dignity."

Harold put his head between his hands in an attempt to think about the situation.

Maude said, "What are you thinking about, it is my money."

"$180 million was your share of the money. I made it grow to what it is today. So keep your fucking mouth shut."

"Do it Mister Purcell, do it right now. Tell them we want an answer by noon tomorrow."

"Do not do that Harold; do not put pressure on them, because they have all the leverage. Make the offer and let it sit. Thomas will do the rest."

"Okay Mister Purcell, do it your way."

"I need a room where I can talk to Thomas alone."

"The sitting room is empty. I will show you the way."

************************

"Do you think he bought it?"

"When was the last time you haven't seen Mel Purcell slobber over the thought of money? I thought he was going to get down on his knees and lick your shoes."

"Did you see his eyes when the three of us got out of the limousine? I think his blood pressure went through the roof."

"I have a feeling something else is going on that William is keeping us from. It wouldn't be the first time he did it to us to keep us clean. Follow the law, and don't do anything outside it. This seems much too easy to me."

**********************

Thomas's telephone rang, and he thought it was the office. "Hello Elise, what's up?"

"You just left, and I have not had time to have a sex change operation."

"Did you forget to kiss me goodbye Mel?"

"One day Thomas, I am going to have you kiss my ass."

"You are going to have to wait a long, long, time for that to happen. How can I help you?"

"The Ames would like to make you a settlement offer of $400 million total. Would you run that by your clients and see if it is acceptable. Would you explain to your clients that Sandra's drinks were tampered with, and that is why she lost control of her vehicle? It is not an excuse, it is an extenuating circumstance."

"You know I cannot promise you anything Mel, but it is a generous offer. I will do what I can to make them accept it. I will make the call as soon as we get off the phone."

"Thank you Thomas, I will look forward to hearing from you."

**************

"William Zabo's office, this is Colonel Lucius Canyon speaking."

"Colonel Canyon, this is Thomas Shackleford, I am William's lawyer. I am handling the case in reference to Rory and Lucy Trevelyan."

"Yes Mister Shackleford, Mister Zabo has turned that case over to me, as it only refers to money now. His nephew and niece are on the mend, and that is all he was interested in. How are things progressing up there?"

"Harold, and Maude Ames, whose daughter Ms. Sandra Finch was driving the red Mercedes, was found not guilty of all charges. It appears someone tampered with her drinks, and it affected her judgment just prior to the accident. They have made a reasonable offer in the amount of $400 million to settle this matter immediately."

"Are you absolutely sure they are telling the truth about this Finch woman?"

"Yes sir, there is no doubt about it. Her bar tab, and the women she sat with all night agreed she never had any alcoholic beverages."

"$400 million is acceptable. Have it placed in the following account within fourteen days."

"Thank you Colonel I will tell them their offer is acceptable, with payment due in fourteen days."

**************

"Mel, Tom, $400 million is approved. You have fourteen days to get it into this account."

"How did you sell it Tom, was he in a good mood?"

"I do not know. He handed it off to one of his executives. This Colonel told me as soon as he found out Lucy and Rory were going to be healthy again, and it was down only to money, he couldn't care less."

"Can you believe that man Thomas?"

"I guess when you have as much money as he has, you can do what you want. I am coming up on my next victim's home. Somehow, I have a feeling this one is not going to be as smart as the Ames were."

"What do you expect; the Ames had a great lawyer."

"Goodbye Mel." Tom turned his personal phone off. He did not want it ringing during the next interrogative.

**************

The gates to the sprawling estate of Hooter Gibson swung open to allow the limousine in. This was money, serious money, and the three men in the limousine smiled. It was time to make a big dent into someone's bank account. They already knew the figures, but it was nice to see the facts before them."

They walked up the steps to the estate, and a servant opened the door.

"Good afternoon gentlemen, Mister and Mrs. Gibson, and Melvin are waiting for you in the drawing room on your left."

"Thomas and James led the way, but Vincent stayed a few steps behind. He asked the gentleman, "Do they pay you well?"

"Sir, they pay me according to my color."

"Thank you, I am going to enjoy the hell out of this."

As he walked into the room, Vincent apologized. "I'm sorry for the delay. I had to adjust my shoe. May I do the interrogative Thomas?"

Shackleford looked at Vincent questioningly, but nodded his head.

"Mister Gibson, why aren't your attorneys here?"

"Attorneys, for a simple accident?"

"You do realize your son is criminally negligent for this accident?"

"We will take care of that when we get to court."

"So you believe this city will not punish him, because of your status in the community?"

"They wouldn't dare." 

Vincent handed the summonses to Mister and Mrs. Gibson, and Melvin. He informed them they were each being sued for $500 million, because the car in question was in their names."

Hooter Gibson yelled, "One and a half billion dollars for an automobile accident? You people are out of your mind. How can you justify that amount of money where no one died, or was seriously injured?"

"Let me bring you up-to-date Mister Gibson. Mrs. Lucey Trevelyan has taken a turn for the worse. She is in ICU, and may or may not lose her baby, and her life. Lucy and Rory have been trying to have a child for 10 years. Their great uncle, William Zabo, is on the warpath, because of this accident. You should be thankful he is not standing here in front of you.

Your son and his friend were traveling down a two-lane road, side by side, at over 100 miles per hour. If this was not reckless enough, it was in the dead of night. They disregarded a sign that warned them of the turn ahead and lost control of both their vehicles as they entered it. Your son's Corvette slid onto the gravel hit Mrs. Finch's Mercedes, which had already hit the Lincoln town car carrying Mister and Mrs. Trevelyan. They were unconscious and hurt by the first accident, only to be hurt again, by your son's irresponsible driving. Then, to add insult to injury, Mister Glover's Jaguar hits the Trevelyan's automobile again. How the Trevelyan's survived is beyond all of us here. How Mrs. Trevelyan managed to keep her baby alive is a miracle only God can understand. If she had lost that baby, William Zabo would be asking for the death penalty for all three of the people involved in the accident. I don't care who would have defended the three of drivers, I guarantee you they would have been found guilty."

"Where am I supposed to get money like that? Even if I sell everything it doesn't come close."

"Mister Gibson, I feel sorry for you. Maybe you can find work like your servants, and get paid like them."

"What do you mean, I pay my servants well."

"In that case you should live well. I think you should contact an attorney immediately, but make sure he's not too expensive. You should pay the attorney in advance, because when we get through with you, and your son, because of his reckless behavior, you will be lucky to have shoes on your feet."

"You son of a bitch."

"Let's not get personal now, because I do not wish to get angry. I know both my father and mother. They are aging well and living in Italy. How my father is dealing with 13-year-old twins is the funniest thing you will ever see."

"I don't give a fuck how your father is dealing with 13-year-old twins. Get out of my house, now."

"May I have those summonses back please? I want to adjust that figure upward, to $600 million each, because you made this personal."

"I'm sorry, I won't do it again I promise."

"Whether it's me or my partners, you had better keep a civil tongue in your mouth Mister Gibson, and get a fucking lawyer."

"I will, I will have one by tomorrow."

Vincent opened his briefcase, and took out a recording device. "Mister Gibson, I want you to know that the three of us recorded this session. Don't tell your lawyer any lies about what was said here, because if you do, I will have people here digging up this house by weeks end and turning it into rubble."

"Yes I understand. I will tell them the truth about this meeting."

"What was my first question when I walked in?"

"You asked me, where is my lawyer."

"Very good Mister Gibson, I think I'll have the IRS check to make sure you are paying your staff above minimum wage. I would hate to think of you making less than minimum wage after we take every penny from you."

"I pay my staff very well."

"I'm very happy to hear that Mister Gibson. Have a wonderful day."

As they were being escorted from the residence, Vincent handed the servant one thousand dollars, and told him it was his pleasure to do so.

When they entered the limousine Tom asked, "What the hell got into you today Vincent? Did someone shove the red hot chili pepper up your ass?"

"The servant's shirt had a frayed collar. It meant one of two things to me. It was his own shirt, or the bastard was as cheap as hell. I delayed a moment and asked if he was paid well. He told me he was paid according to his color. I told him I am going to enjoy the hell out of this. He smiled."

James Hurst said, "You two got your rocks off today, can I do the next one?"

Tom said, "Okay Jim, just remember if you get into trouble, we have your back."

Suddenly a cell phone started ringing. Since Jim and Tom had turned their personal cell phones off, and only their special cell phones on, they panicked, and started searching their jackets for them. It had to be answered by the third ring or there would be hell to pay. Celeste would kill them, or worse, they could lose her as a client. Suddenly, it stopped ringing. They looked at each other in despair. They continued looking, and found their special phones in their briefcases. They checked to see which one of them she called. Their phones showed no missed phone calls. They had no idea what the hell was going on. Then they turned towards Vincent, who was quietly talking to his wife, Donna. They attacked him unmercifully.

Covering his head he yelled, "What did I do?"

Tom pulled Vincent's phone away from him. "Donna darling, after we kill him, we will let him talk to you again."

"Okay Thomas, but be gentle on the part that I love."

As they pummeled him, Tom said, "The only phones Jim and I had turned on were for Celeste. When your phone rang, we thought it was her, and we couldn't find our phones. After the third ring, everything went silent. We thought we lost Celeste as a client. When we saw you on the phone with Donna, you deserved the death penalty."

"Gentlemen may I remind you that you do not share your illicit gains from Mrs. Castronova's account with me. I do not complain about it, because she is your private client. I would suspect after you two retire you would take her with you and keep a one-client office. I, however, have a wife who I love, and she calls me because she misses me. Ten children and she still looks like God's gift to womanhood. I couldn't care if Mrs. Castronova called and you could not find your phone, because it does not affect me. Your aged minds are making you forget where you place your pens, phones, and wives. Be careful gentlemen that last one could cost you 50 percent of everything you have ever had, or will have. I am sure Trudy would love to have your home in the Hamptons. She may even find a boy toy to fly your helicopter."

"I will crash my helicopter first."

"Will you be in it? It will mean more for Jim and me."

"Someone did put a hot red chili pepper up your ass today. Why aren't you in court?"

"You brought me here to Vermont remember, or is your mind aging that quickly?"

"I am going to hit you."

"Go right ahead, you're too old to hurt me."

"Why did I have to get you into my alma mater?"

"I believe it was because you won a $1 billion settlement for my parents."

"Yes, that was nice, and the $17 billion award for Celeste didn't hurt either."

"Yes, but that was a class action suit and you didn't make as much money off that than you did for my parents. You two only got $750 million in her private suit, and you had to split the profits between you."

"Yes that was a terrible payday also. Do you want to know what the worst part of it is Vincent?"

"Of course I do."

"We have to be honest to the penny on both our corporate taxes and personal taxes, because the IRS is up our ass every year."

"I feel very bad for you guys, I really do. However, think about me. In two years, I lose my last four dependents. I lose my tax deduction paying for college. Do you realize what a big increase that is going to be on my yearly state, and federal income taxes? They are going to be all over me like army ants wondering what they can get from me next."

"Are you ready Tom?"

"Absolutely Jim, one, two, three; AAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW."

Vinny laughed. "I love you guys."

****************

They arrived at another palatial estate, with high wrought iron fences and Arabian horses roaming around at will. They stopped at the gate, and a guard came out to greet them.

"We are here to see Mr. and Mrs. Rawlings and Wilson Glover, and their son, Daniel."

"What is your name sir?"

"Thomas Shackleford."

"One moment please." He went to the guardhouse and made a call. When he returned he said, "Mister and Mrs. Glover do not wish to see you now."

"We are here to serve summons on the three Glover's. Do they want me to call the police to gain access, or do they want to do it the easy way. Tell them I can see their attorney's car parked on the side of the house." 

The guard did not return; he simply opened the gates.

As they were led into the lounge, Tom said, "Mel, if you are going to represent two clients, and you are trying to keep the second client a secret, either park your car in the garage, or rent a different one."

"I'm only sitting in Tom. They are hiring another attorney as soon as possible."

"Have you advise them of their rights and responsibilities yet?"

"Yes I have."

James Hurst said, "Mister and Mrs. Glover, Daniel, I want you to know we are taping this conversation. Mister Purcell has indicated he told you what your rights and responsibilities are. Vincent Caruso will now hand you summonses, which require you to be in attendance at the courthouse two weeks from Monday for depositions. One of the three of us will be in attendance. The Jaguar in question was in all three of your names. It makes all three of you responsible parties in this incident. Unfortunately, for all of you, Daniel is the most responsible party in this incident. We will prove, in a court of law, the area his Jaguar hit the Lincoln town car caused the most severe damage to Mrs. Lucy Trevelyan and her husband Rory. The Jaguar's imprint is shown just left of the center support posts of the town car, causing a concussion to Mister Trevelyan and severe bruising of his body, while he was attempting to protect his wife from further injury to her body. Today, she was moved back into ICU, because she had a relapse. It is not known if she will survive, if the baby will survive, or where the pain in her side is emanating from. We have jet standing by in Burlington just in case we have to rush her to Boston.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26



At this moment, we are only asking for $650 million from each of you. If anything happens to the baby, or Lucy, I do not know how high William Zabo will tell me to go. If you have a place in another universe I would plan on visiting it very soon, because if you try to hide from him on this planet, he will find you, and bring you to justice."

Rawlings Glover said, "You are talking about $2 billion for minor accident?""

"This was not a minor accident. This is very close to becoming vehicular homicide. Pray that Lucy, and, or the baby doesn't die Mister Glover. I am sure you have heard the name William Zabo before. Have you ever interacted with him?"

"I was at a seminar he gave several years back."

"Did you learn anything there?"

"Yes I did. I learned how to make money from money. I also learned how not to lose money by buckling in to a bluff."

"Have you ever heard William Zabo bluff?"

"There is always a first time."

"Do you want to be the one that finds out if you are right or wrong?"

After a moment's pause, Jim said, "I did not think so. We just left your neighbor, Mister Gibson. You may want to converse with him to see if he felt we were bluffing. We also talked with the Ames. They made a settlement offer that was accepted because their daughter was drugged by someone before she left your private club. If we could prove it was either of your sons that did this to her, not only would they be in jail for the rest of their lives, you would never have penny to your name for that length of time either. 

The Ames are depositing a check within fourteen days. Each day you delay in making an offer that is acceptable to Mister Zabo, a day is deducted. Tomorrow is thirteen days. When it reaches zero, we go to court, and increase the amount of money we are suing you for. I do not care if your son has to muck stalls for the rest of his life, but I will make sure you never collect food stamps or any government benefits. If I were you Mister Glover, your son Daniel's next conveyance would be a used bicycle, because he has just cost you everything you have ever earned. Good day sir.

"Wait Jim, wait one moment, please, let me talk to them."

"Okay Mel, ten minutes maximum, I want to call the hospital to see how Lucy is doing."

"The three of you stay here, we will move to another room."

******************

Mister and Mrs. Glover, I know you are retaining counsel as soon as possible, but let me tell you something about those three attorneys inside. You were not subjected to their best attorney that would be the tall thin gentleman, Thomas Shackleford. You were grilled by James Hurst. I will tell you about him in a second. The youngest of the group is Vincent Caruso. He is not as smooth as Thomas yet, but he will cut you apart like a bread slicer, and you will never know which direction he came from. In a few years, he will be the best lawyer in the country. James Hurst is the mild mannered alter ego of Superman. The only difference is he is not bothered by kryptonite. He walks around the courtroom as if he does not know what the next question is supposed to be, but he is two weeks ahead of everyone, including the judge. The jurors love him, because he acts like they do. The thing you must know is in all their combined years they have never lost a trial, not one. They beat the United States government, multinational corporations, fellow lawyers, you name it they have beaten them. They are not afraid to take risks because their rewards are huge.

As far as your case is concerned, you are small potatoes. They got a phone call from William, and they were on the case in moments. They can tell each of you everything you have done since you picked up your Social Security cards. If I were sitting in your shoes, I would be thinking about an offer as high as you can go, and leaving yourself a little to live on, and I mean a little. They will reject, out of hand, anything that leaves you too much, because if they presented that to William Zabo, he would cut their throats.

That is all I have to say. You can wait for your new counsel, and I hope they help you get through this. I have given you my best advice, and I would go before any professional law review board, and gladly explain my position.

Rawlings Glover looked at his son. "Do you see what you have done to us you ungrateful bastard."

Danny Glover responded, "I have never been ungrateful for everything you've given me dad. My life has been everything you could ever dream of and more. I must have made that turn 1000 times, and nothing ever happened. Who knew there was going to be an accident on the other side of that turn, because no one ever uses that road. I know I didn't know it would be there, and I am sure Mel Gibson didn't either. I know I'll never be able to repay everything these men are asking you to pay, but I will do whatever you want me to do from now on."

"Thank you Danny, those words mean a lot to me. As long as you follow through with them, we will be able to make it. There are going to be a lot of changes around here, but if they take my offer, we should be okay."

"Mister Purcell, we can go back in there now."

************

"James my client would like to make a settlement offer to end this unpleasantness. Mister Glover, go ahead."

"Mister Hurst, you gave me a fourteen day deadline. It will be very tight for me, because I will have to sell three separate portfolios, and two separate bond funds. The maximum I can get by that date is $1.2 billion. Even given more time, I would never be able to reach the $1.95 billion your client is asking for."

Jim looked at Tom Shackleford and asked, "Do you think it's even worth a phone call?"

"It's a bona fide offer Jim; we have to make the call. I'll just put my handkerchief over the receiver so he doesn't break my eardrum. Can I have a private room for a moment Mel?"

Rawlings Glover said to his son, "Danny, take Mister Shackleford into my study please."

"Yes sir. Mister Shackleford if you would follow me please."

*********

"Mister William Zabo's office, this is Colonel Lucius Canyon speaking."

"Hello Colonel, this is Tom Shackleford calling again. We have an offer from the Glover family for $1.2 billion. Our initial request was $1.95 billion. We can have this money within fourteen days. He said that he would never be able to reach the higher amount even given much more time."

"$1.2 billion within two weeks is acceptable. Place the money into the same account. Which family is the holdout?"

"It would be the Gibson's Colonel."

"Do you know their total net worth?

"Yes sir, I have it in the car."

"Tomorrow amend our suit to $100 million more than their net worth. Lucy will be going to Mass General soon."

"How would you know that Colonel?"

"I just spoke to Rory, and Lucy is going the wrong way. You should get to the hospital as soon as you are done there."

"Okay Colonel, we will be out of here in a few minutes."

************

"Mister Glover, you do not know how lucky you are. Your offer of $1.2 billion within two weeks is accepted. Mel you have the account number. If you had not made an offer and it was not accepted, you would have been in big trouble. Lucy Trevelyan has just taken a turn for the worst. We are heading for the hospital now. She'll be flown down to Boston as soon as possible. If anything happens to her, only the Gibson family is left vulnerable. If anything happens to the baby, or Lucy, when William Zabo gets finished with them, they will be lucky to have hair left on their heads. Mel you know what to do, we are leaving."

The limousine left rubber on the road as it headed for the hospital. Melvin Purcell wiped the perspiration from his forehead.

"Mister Glover, I know it's a ton of money that you are parting with, and I know it hurts. If Tom made that phone call ten minutes later, or if it would have been disapproved, your exposure would have been the maximum."

"Mister Purcell, I made my life and my money by reading people. When Mister Shackleford came in from making that phone call, I knew he was not kidding around. His eyes were relaxed when he left this room. When he returned they were like lasers. They were so focused and so narrow you knew he was thinking about something extremely important about his client. I thought I was dead in the water. When he said the offer was approved, I breathe a sigh of relief. When he said Mrs. Trevelyan had taken a turn for the worse, I couldn't understand why they had accepted my offer. I am very gratified that they did. I will start working on my portfolios first thing tomorrow morning, and if you will tell me where to send the money it will be there on time."

*******************

"Hi babe, did you miss me?"

"Have you been in the bathroom jerking off again?"

"No, I just got off the phone with the Colonel. Get ready to go to Boston. Our attorneys are due here any moment. How is the pain in your side?"

"I don't know Rory. I feel it on the right, and then it's in the middle, then it's back to the right. All I know is that it hurts, and it hurts a lot."

"Have they given you anything for the pain?"

"They won't give me anything strong, because of the baby."

"How about bourbon?"

"Rory, when I'm feeling better, I'm going to kick your ass so high you will be able to paint the ceiling without any help."

"I didn't know the ceilings needed painting."

"Rory... Oh just forget it."

"Do I frustrate you my dear?"

"You would frustrate a musk ox."

*************

The lawyers had three destinations: Tom went to the hospital administrator's office, Vincent went to see Lucy's, and Jim went to the courthouse to get an order for Lucy's release from the hospital.

As soon as Vincent entered her room, heard her complain about the moving abdominal pain. He said to Rory, "I'll bet you it's her spleen. I'll bet you it is referred pain coming from the left side. I'm going to see if they have a helicopter to take her to Burlington."

Rory said, "I'll tell the nurses to get ready to transport her."

The nurses said, "We can't do that without doctor's approval."

"Nurse, start getting her ready to go, and get me someone who thinks he is a doctor."

Tom was running down the hallway. "Call the pilots, and tell them to get the jet ready."

"A Doctor came down the hall, asking what they were doing to his patient, Mrs. Trevelyan."

Tom looked him in the eye and said, "We are removing her from this Third World hospital, and taking her to Massachusetts General, where she can get proper care. If she dies because of the inferior care she received here, we will close this fucking place, and re-open it with a staff that knows what they're doing. I think it will look wonderful in the news for the capital of the state of Vermont to have its hospital close, because of poor and ineffective service. We will sue every Doctor that touched Mrs. Trevelyan, the city of Montpelier, and the State of Vermont, for the way she was treated here medically."

"Rory, you are still friends with Sheriff, right. Until we can get a court order, ask him if he will post a guard in the record department to make sure they don't destroy any of Lucy's records."

"I'll do it right now Mister Shackleford."

***************

"May I speak to Chief Bunker please? This is Rory Trevelyan calling."

"Hi Rory, how is Lucy doing?"

"Very poorly Archie, that's why I am calling. We are getting ready to take her to Boston, and I need a favor. Our lawyers are in town and they would like you to post someone to guard her records. With all the work you did making sure they weren't tampered with, I would hate to see them disappear now. One of our lawyers is headed to the courthouse to have them sealed, but while he's there, anyone can get to them. Could you do that for me please?"

"I'll have a man there in five minutes Rory. I'll pray for Lucy, the baby, and you. Good luck my friend."

"This town could not have picked a better man for Chief of Police Archie. No one in the entire town could look after it better. I will keep in touch with you, whether I come back or not. Goodbye Archie."

"Goodbye Rory, Godspeed."

**************

Mimi, get Sergeant Shepard in here. "Yes boss."

"You wanted me chief?"

"Alan, I want you to go to the hospital and guard the records of Lucy Trevelyan. No one touches them, and I mean no one. A lawyer is at the courthouse now getting a judge to sign an order to get the records sealed. They are taking her to Massachusetts, and I wouldn't want to be one of the doctor's that fucked up on her treatment."

"Should I put a couple of cars in front of the hospital to lead them to Burlington?"

"Call in four guys for overtime. We still have all that money in the banks and I don't want to be court short here. Alan, tell them I need them, really need them."

"I'll get them for you chief, don't worry about it."

***************

"Mister Shackleford, the police will be here shortly."

"They are getting ready to move Lucy now Rory. Where are you staying?"

Rory explained, and handed over the keys. Vincent would take over his new job, and residence.

***************

They wheeled Lucy through the emergency room exit and out onto the deck where the EMT's loaded her into the truck. When they tried to tell Rory he could not ride in the back with her, Vincent asked the technician when and where he would like his next job to be. There was no comment as Rory climbed in the back to hold Lucy's hand.

He kneeled down on the cold corrugated steel floor, and said, "We have a police escort, and it's only forty miles. We will be there before you can fall asleep."

"Kiss me, you liar."

"Did they give you anything for pain?"

"Yes Lortab. It's safe for the baby."

"Is it helping my baby's baby?"

"Not much, but it is taking the edge off."

"Should I sing for you?"

"Don't you dare, I've heard you sing in the shower, and the rats in the sewer ran away."

"That's not a nice thing to say Mrs. Trevelyan, when you are better I may have to spank you.

"As long as I'm feeling well, I may just let you. We have waited a long time for this, and I would rather die than lose it."

"Don't talk like that. I could not live without you. We have been through a lot of hard times together, but it's always been together. What would I do if I lost you? Then again, there is that blonde on the cover of Playboy."

"Rory I'm going to smack you into next week."

"Now there's the girl I married, and love. Let's just get through this, and I will let you smack me into next week."

"Do you promise?"

"Can we do it in front of my dentist's office? I have a feeling I will need him."

"Yes, we can do it in front of your dentist office. I'll even schedule you an appointment for the entire morning."

"You are so thoughtful."

***********

They backed up to the jet, with the doors of the EMT truck opened. They rolled Lucy out on the backboard carried her up the steps and into the cabin. They tied the stretcher down, as the number 2 engine started.

Rory was at the bottom of the steps handing out money to everyone and thanking them for their help. He rushed up the steps, as they were pulled away. They aircraft started moving before the number one engine was fully engaged, and the front door completely closed.

Since it was an emergency flight, they were moved to the front of the line of aircraft waiting to take off. Within minutes, they were in the air heading directly to Boston.

Air traffic controllers bend the rules when it comes to emergency flights. Normally the rule is, "You can't get there directly from here, you have to go here first to get in line." When you are on emergency flight, as the one Lucy was flying on, you go direct from Burlington to Boston and it's only 182 flight miles instead of 280 going the standard air traffic way. Forty minutes flying time rather than an hour and twenty minutes.

As soon as the aircraft reached the general aviation terminal, at Boston's Logan Airport, Lucy was transferred to an ambulance, with Rory alongside her. A police escort rushed them to Massachusetts General Hospital, where a team of doctors, and technicians were waiting for her arrival. 

All the doctor's notes, x-rays, and scans from Montpelier had been forwarded to them. So many tests had been omitted; the doctors understood why they could not find the cause of her ailment.

Two hours after all the new testing was done a gray-haired man walked into her room with a smile on his face. 

"Lucy, My name is Doctor Fred Colson, and I am happy to say you are going to be fine. I don't know what kind of doctor's they have up there in Montpelier, and I won't testify to what I am about to say, but they're all a bunch of idiots. You weren't in one car accident; you were actually in three of them, according to what I've read. No one up there bothered to check your spleen. Your spleen is nearly 3 times the size it's supposed to be. If you make a fist, that's the size your spleen should be. Right now, your spleen is three times that size. It's amazing you can get any air into your left lung. 

The first thing were going to do tomorrow morning is give you a local anesthetic and stick a needle into it to see if there is any excess fluid buildup inside it. 

We are also going to start you on a course of antibiotics to help your spleen do what it normally does by itself. Finally, we are going to put you on a course of physical therapy. We are going to get you up, out of bed, and moving again. Resting is not the best course of action for you, because it only builds up fluids in your body, and you have a beautiful body."

"Doctor!"

"I don't mean it that way, I'm talking medically. Your muscle tone is excellent. You have the heart of the teenage girl. You are fit in trim like a triathlete. Your whole body looks 15 years younger than your chronological age. Are you an avid runner? Do you run for a team, or a club, because those are the only people who are in your kind of physical condition? You have less than four percent body fat, but that has to change now that you're pregnant. The needs of your baby have to come before your own needs or wants. The baby needs to feed off your fat, and if you don't have any fat stored up, it starves. I don't believe you want that to happen. Do you live in the Boston area?"

"No we live near Dallas."

"What were you doing up in Vermont?"

"It was a joint business and pleasure trip. It turned out to be a disaster for us."

"I can see that, but you have one healthy baby inside you, and in a month you will have your healthy body back to go along with it. You will be in our care for at least three weeks, because we do not fool around with spleen injuries. No one thinks of the spleen as anything important, but it is a major part of the lymph system. It cleans both the red and white blood cells, while getting rid of the waste that's in our bloodstream. The body is severely impacted without a healthy functioning spleen."

Lucy said, "Thank you Doctor Colson, you've made me feel much better. What do I do about the pain?"

"Kick him out of the room."

Lucy laughed, until she started to cough.

Rory said, "That wasn't nice Doctor, I'm her better half."

"It sure doesn't look like it to me."

Lucy started to laugh again, but she finally calmed herself.

"Doctor, please, no more. I know he's ugly, but he is mine."

"We all have our crosses to bear."

"Where did you learn all these jokes?"

"My wife is a urologist. She has had more dicks in her hand then you can count. You should hear her when she comes back from a convention. It is nonstop jokes."

"How soon do you want to start Lucy on physical therapy?"

"I will set it up for tomorrow, twice a day."

"Does that mean we can start fooling around?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 27



Chapter 27 

Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

Note: Can you find a way to fuck up good news? I did, and I will tell you about it later. 

129. Let's Take A Bearing 

All good things must come to an end, and when Even returned to his desk Monday morning he wanted to scream. So he did. 

His secretary ran into his office. "What's wrong Doctor Luck?" 

"Look at my desk; I'll never get back to the lab." 

Cindy yelled. "What the fuck are you talking about; Suzanne and I got rid of three quarters of the shit that was on your desk. You should be able to get rid of that stuff by noon." 

"Cindy, you cursed at me." 

"You fucking deserved it. You took a week off with no notice, and left us with our asses hanging out. We worked like dogs to keep this office running, and the first thing you do when you walk in is complain. If I didn't need this dam fucking job, I'd quit." 

"What is your job title Cindy?" 

"I am your secretary." 

"You are fired." 

"What, for this one fucking righteous outburst?" 

"You bet your ass for the one simple righteous outburst. You are rehired as my administrative assistant, at four times your salary and benefits. You can tell me where to go, and what to do anytime you want. It will keep me in line." 

"Doctor Luck, I've wanted to tell you where to go for years. I don't know what stopped me." 

"Good sense and timing. Where is Suzanne?" 

"She is back in the secretarial pool." 

"Get her up here. She is now your secretary, at double her salary." 

"You don't know how thrilled she will be. Suzanne hates being in the pool." 

"Get to work Cindy, before I change my mind." 

"Do you want to know why you're not going to change your mind?" 

"Of course I want to know." 

"Suzanne and I will never touch your desk again." 

"That's an excellent reason. Find your secretary and get to work." 

"Yes Doctor." 

"Doctor, can I still tell you to go fuck yourself?" 

"I wouldn't suggest it, unless you really sure of yourself." 

"That's what I thought. I'll be back in 30 minutes." 

"Make that 10 minutes, I know where the secretarial pool is." 

"I was going to use the bathroom." 

"Make that 13 a half minutes." 

"I'm not even going to ask you how you have that figured out." 

"I'll give you the numbers if you would like?" 

"No thank you Doctor, I'm sure you're correct." 

"I am." 

****************** 

The three boys were working on the second level of their spaceship, when Teddy decided today was a good day to be a rambunctious. She crawled across the board, moving all their pieces, smudging their pen marks, and destroying all their hard work as she went along. 

"Do something with her mom, before I tie her up." 

Delicious was at her wits end with her carrot top monster. However, she came up the perfect answer. Gray was horrified when she put the front loading baby carrier on him, and put Teddy in it. She put the baby bag into his left hand and his attache' case into his right. She kissed him goodbye, and wished him luck. She opened the door, and said, "Have a wonderful day dear." 

Gray kissed her. "Bitch." 

As he walked down the path, she yelled, "You'll be in trouble when you get home." 

Gray turned, "When am I not in trouble when I come home?" 

He got in the back of the SUV, kissed Teddy's head, and asked, "Are you going to cause me trouble today?" 

"Yes daddy." 

"Why?" 

"Today is fun day. It rain outside, me have fun inside." 

"You sure it rain today?" 

"Bad rain, all day." 

"Call the NEST Steve, and have them batten down the hatches. My little weather forecaster says we are going to have torrential rain all day." 

"It's not in the forecast Doctor." 

"Would you like to bet $20 on who is right?" 

"No, I'll call the NEST." 

************ 

As they entered the building, the first light drops of rain fell out of the clear blue sky. 

He put the briefcase and the baby bag on the metal detector rack, and they went through the metal detector without a problem. 

Teddy yelled, "Me To, Me to!" 

"No Teddy, it uses X-rays to see inside the cases. It's not good for the human body." 

"I want to go for a ride." 

"Be quiet, or I'll put you through the shredder." 

"I'll tell mommy." 

"You won't be able to tell mommy after I put you through the shredder." 

"You not fair." 

"I don't have to be fair. I'm your father, and I have to teach you right from wrong." 

"Like grandpa?" 

"Yes, just like grandpa." 

"Okay, I learn." 

********** 

By the time they got in the elevator, it was pouring outside. 

Gray had been working on a project for almost 3 weeks, and kept running into the same problem. He could visualize it, and knew it should work, but he could not prove it to the computer. 

He went back to his original program, which he knew inherently was the best, and began again. He reached the same point, and the computer faulted. 

He pounded the keyboard, and yelled, "God dammit." 

Teddy said, "God not do with it. You go wrong way." 

"What are you talking about Teddy?" 

"You go left, when posed go right." 

"Where am I supposed to go right instead of left?" 

"I tired, go sleep now." 

Gray wanted to ring her neck for not giving him the answer, but the indication was he was supposed to find it himself. 

Teddy's head was already slumped over to the left, quietly sleeping. He kissed her, and get back to work. 

He went through every line of code looking for a place where he could have made an error. He wanted to kick himself when he found it. Three weeks wasted, because of a simple mathematical error. How could he be so stupid? How did he not see it when he went over and over it a dozen times? 

"I'm sorry I said your name in vain. It is a human failing, and I am only human. This child will teach me more than I will teach her." 

He picked up the phone and called me. 

"Even, we have another patentable product. You may want to come over and look at it." 

I was over at his desk in a minute, because I knew what he was working on something special. 

"How did you make the breakthrough Gray?" 

"My little wonder told me how to do it. She said I went left when I was supposed to go right. I went through every line of code with a fine toothcomb early in the project; I made a stupid mathematical error. When I fixed it, look at the outcome."  

"Will you look at the strength of that fiber? It lightweight and can stop an armor-piercing round. Wait until the military sees this. Uniforms will be so light they will not need those bulky protectors. It will be interesting to find out if we can make shoes out of this that will help our guys not worry about IED's. 

I will have Rod get to Washington tomorrow morning, and get the matrix to Dycke Schneider by courier tonight. He's going to go buggy." 

Gray said, "I love the look in that man's eyes when we give him something like this to do. He looks like a kid in a toy store, with an unlimited budget." 

"Well he does have an unlimited budget." 

"It's a shame this won't be ready for 'The Best Luck', but it will make Holden's spaceship a great deal lighter than he anticipated. His initial speed estimates were between Warp 12 to 14 at 400,000 tons. If this new material drops him by 75,000 tons, he could hit Warp 16. You did great work Gray, absolutely great work. Between your material, and Gordon's, steel may be on the way out of the construction industry in 10 years. The Chinese will have a heart attack when that happens. They have based their new economy on selling cheap steel around the world. When this is ready, and we start to make, and sell these new materials here in the United States, the balance of trade will swing in the favor of the US. What are you going to call it? " 

"Do I have a choice in naming it Even? This little one gave me the answer, so it gets named after her, TEDDY." 

"Trade groups are going to ask you what it means." 

"We will tell them it's an industrial secret." 

"It will drive them all crazy Gray, but it's a great name, for a wonderful child." 

*************** 

He shook his head, got up off the grass, and made sure all the important parts were still in working order. He tried to remember what happened to him, but there were pieces missing. He walked over to the oak bucket, submerged his head, and when he pulled it out he remembered. 

"Holy shit, all I did was ask her how old she was. We have been together for 14 years, and I don't remember her changing one bit. She looks the same today as the day I first met her. I remember one of the first things she said to me. 

"If I tell you you're going to die, you are going to die. If I tell you you're going to live you are going to live." Maybe she was 20 back then, but she hasn't aged a day. I've got to get her on our spacecraft. I won't know what to do without her. I'll sleep out here on the porch; I don't want to disturb anyone. It's a nice night to look at the stars anyhow." 

Liz opened the front door, at 6:45 AM, and saw him sleeping on the bench. 

"I see you're still alive." 

"Yes I'm still here. Monty was nice to me; she didn't feed me to the wolves." 

"Don't you know you never ask a woman her age"? 

"I know it now. I didn't know it last night. I'm only 16, and there are certain nuances that go with women that I have not yet learned." 

"I guess you won't make that mistake again." 

"Not in this lifetime, or the next three, I learned that lesson the hard way." 

"Dammit, I thought for sure he wouldn't wake up until noon." 

"If you're still angry with me for making a boyish mistake, I'll go lay down on the grass where I was." 

"No you spoiled my morning already." 

"I'm sorry about last night; I didn't know it was offensive to women to ask their age." 

"Just for the sake of argument, how old do you think I am?" 

"I tried to figure that out when I woke up. Please don't kill me; I think you are 33 years old." 

He heard something drop in the kitchen. 

"I'm sorry, please don't kill me." 

"How did you come up with that age?" 

"Do you remember the conversation we had, while I was hanging from the ceiling?" 

"Yes." 

"You said you weren't ready for the world when you were 16. You weren't ready for what was outside the military gates. You trained your mind, and your body to a razor's edge those extra two years, to get yourself ready. When you were 18, you had no choice. You went outside the fence, and joined this group, who trained you even harder. 

They didn't want you to have a high-value target as your first assignment, so they gave you me instead. They had no idea who I was, or what I was capable of doing, because I was only three years old. This morning I counted. You were 19, and we've been together for 14 years. So, I thought you could be 32 to 33 years old." 

Liz laughed. "Monty you have to kill him, your secret is out." 

"Not another word Liz or I will feed you to the Colonel." 

"You're kidding Liz, Monty is 33?" 

"On your birthday, Monty will be 33." 

"Liz you're a dead woman." 

"We share a birthday. How cool is that. Wait a minute, why don't you fit the profile?" 

Liz said, "Stay away from that area Gordon, especially if you like living." 

"I'm sorry Monty, I'm sorry if I went to an area I'm not supposed to." 

"You had no way of knowing Gordon. Just don't bring it up again." 

"I promise you won't hear a word from me ever again May I ask you a question and it doesn't have to do with that area." 

"Yes you can." 

"If you had the opportunity to go with us, would you go?" 

"I would go in a heartbeat." 

"Start packing, because I am going to get you onto that spacecraft." 

"You have a long road to go, and those restrictions are not there to be taken lightly." 

"I know, but I will get it done. If I have to change the rotation of the earth to do it, I will get it done." 

Half-awake Zoie said, "If you listen to the tone of his voice, believe him, he will get it done. When he's angry like that, even his dad can't stop him." 

"Well, if that's the case, I better kill a buffalo. I may need a warm coat where we're going." 

"Can't you just buy a leather coat in the store?" 

"Why would I buy a leather coat, when I have one on the hoof right in front of me?" 

"Because you have to kill it, and you don't know what size coat you need." 

"I need an extra-large, which means I have to kill a large buffalo. I will pick out an old one, who won't make it through the winter, because of the weather or the wolves. I will drag it into the barn and you will help me skin it, cut the meat off, and grind up the bones to make meal for the chickens and cows." 

Zoie ran to the side of the porch and began giving back last night's dinner. 

Liz said, "Somehow I don't think Zoie is going to be much help." 

Gordon was a funny color green. "I'll do it. I will help. Can I wear a blindfold?" 

"Yes you can, but you won't have hands or arms left when they get caught in the grinder. You will make it Gordon; you will even get the head as a prize." 

"What would the Klingons think of me wearing a buffalo head?" 

"Don't worry about the Klingons; it's the Kardasians you should worry about. Their eyes are bigger." 

"Good thinking, their armaments are better also. That gives me a thought; I should start working on a cloaking device, just in case we run into some unfriendly people." 

"Oh Lord, I will never see my laptop again." 

"It's only two more days Monty. How much trouble can he possibly get into, in 48 hours?" 

"Oh Liz, you have no idea what trouble this boy can get into, in 48 hours, and a computer." 

"I think we should kill that buffalo now. Once we have him slit it down the center, and have the innards fall out onto him, it will take his mind off work, and Zoie in a hurry." 

"I think we should have Zoie watch him do it." 

Zoie screamed, "I'm going back to bed. Don't wake me up until it's all over." 

"Baby, Monty is giving me the head as a prize." 

"If you bring a buffalo head into our room, one horn is going up your ass, and the other is going down your throat. When my hands meet, I'll leave the bones where they are, and pull your heart out for good measure." 

"Monty not even I thought up something that evil." 

"That's because you've never been in love. When it happens to you, anything goes, even your lover for any perceived indiscretion." 

"That's not fair Monty, how would you feel if the person you love walked into the room with a buffalo head on." 

"The Indians, who roamed these plains before we got here, used buffalo heads as a sign of status. Only Indian chiefs and medicine men wore them. The more buffalo horns you wore around your neck showed how great a hunter you were. There was very little infighting between the Indian tribes before we got here and started killing off buffalo just for their hides. One of our illustrious presidents said, "Kill a buffalo kill an Indian." Do you know who said that? 

Both youngsters said, "No." 

"The great hunter himself, "Theodore Roosevelt." He didn't care if the Indians starved as long as the white man continued to move west. There was gold in the Dakotas, and he wanted it. Nearly single-handedly, he wiped out the Sioux Nation. Today we call it genocide, back then they called it progress. The land my ranch is located on was once part of a large Indian reservation. It was taken away from them, as they were pushed further west, into areas that are more arid, and they couldn't grow food of any kind. In my Will, I give this land back to them. My parents will live here all the days of their lives with impunity, but all 250,000 acres are being returned to all the Sioux nations." 

"How did you pay for all this land Monty?" 

"You know my father was in the military. His father, and grandfather were prospectors and they hit it big. They were smart enough not to spend it all on frivolous things. They bought all this land just west of Yellowstone Park, piece by piece as it became available. People thought they were crazy, but they weren't. They let the Indians hunt on this property any time they wanted to, and there was never a problem between them. The Indians are still fighting the government for payment to the land that was stolen from them. I don't think they'll ever get the money. That's why I'm giving this land back to them." 

"Monty when God made you, she broke the mold." 

Liz said, "Look at the size of her, God didn't break the mold, she did." 

"Liz, you're a dead woman." 

"You may be able to hit a buffalo with that long rifle of yours, but you could never hit anything as small as me." 

"Why don't you start running and we will find out." 

"Running, I could crawl." 

"That's it, you're gone." 

"Liz took off like a rabbit, and Monty took off after her like a fox." 

It was the funniest thing Gordon and Zoie had ever witnessed. Every time Monty got close, Liz would turn 90 degrees on a dime. Monty on the other hand, had to round it out because of her larger frame. 

Liz kept yelling, "Come on slowpoke, what's keeping you?" 

"When I get you, you're going to be hanging next to a buffalo." 

"I guess you're not shooting a buffalo for two days." 

Monty was within two feet of her, reached out her arm to grab her, and Liz made another of her patented turns. 

Monty screamed in anger. "I will get you for this you little witch." 

"Apparently it won't be today tubby." 

"You are playing with fire little girl." 

"You are not fast enough to put me out." 

"Do you want to run 100 meter dash to see if I am faster than you are? I'll bet you $1000 I am." 

Liz said, "I've never made such easy money in all my life. When do you want to do it?" 

"Let's measure out 100 meters, and go." 

"That works for me." 

They came to a stop, and Monty smacked Liz on the back of her head. 

Liz retaliated by smacking Monty's ass. 

"Couldn't reach my head little girl?" 

"I didn't want to damage that tiny brain of yours." 

Monty screamed, "Zoie, in the kitchen cabinet, on the right side, is a large tape measure, get it for me please." 

Zoie ran inside, and found the largest tape measure she had ever seen. 

"Is this the one Monty?" 

"That one will do." 

Monty took a rock and pounded a stake through the large rectangular end. 

"Make sure this doesn't move Gordon." 

"Yes ma'am." 

"Let's go Liz; we're going for a walk." 

110 meters later, they stopped. Monty put a heavy rock on the tape. She walked back 10 meters and drew a line on both sides of the tape. 

Liz said, "I would like my money in cash, when we get home." 

"I won't tell the Colonel you shot that sleaze ball that killed Tanya and Margaret." 

"I did not." 

"You are a lying sack of shit and you know it. No one else had cause to put a bullet through his head. No one else is that good a shot from any distance to do that much damage. Half an inch lower, and his ears would've exploded." 

"That's where I was aiming, but I missed." 

"It's a hard shot from the back of a van when you don't have lateral movement." 

"How did you know?" 

"It's in the police pictures. Either they didn't care, or they were happy the bastard was dead. I would go with number two." 

"I thought I was the smartest person on the planet." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 27



"They couldn't have traced it to you. You rented the van under an assumed name. Your rifle was untraceable, and you were at home recuperating from an accident that nearly killed you. Who's going to look at you as an assailant? I will tell you one thing; don't ever let the Colonel find out it was you. He wanted to skin that guy alive, because he killed two of our people, and especially Margaret. He was in love with her, but because of Dan he never made a move." 

"You are a wealth of knowledge today. Are you telling me this stuff just so you can rest before I beat your ass in this race?" 

"That's funny; I thought I was giving you a chance to rest." 

"Zoie, you can start the race." 

"Okay I'm going to do it like this: ready-set-go. Is that okay with you?" 

"Yes that's fine 

Monty said, "I'll see you at the coffee table when you get there." 

"I'll be on my second cup." 

Zoie yelled, "Ready, Set, Go." 

The rabbit and fox were at it again. Liz was ahead by a shoulder as they passed the halfway mark, but Monty would not give up. She lengthened her stride and added more power behind each thrust of her foot as it hit the ground. At 75 meters, they were shoulder to shoulder, and put everything they had behind every movement. 

Monty had a trick up her sleeve, and she saved it for the last six strides. Neck and neck, shoulder to shoulder, Monty yelled, "WIMP!" 

It did exactly what she wanted it to do. It took Liz's focus away from the race. She glanced at Monte for a millisecond and lost her concentration. Monty won by half a body length." 

Liz screamed, "YOU CHEATED." 

"Did I touch you? Did I cross the line? Did I foul in any way? How could I possibly have cheated? Gordon did you see me cheat?" 

Gordon had a big smile on. "As far as I know, talking during a race is not cheating, but I am not an expert. I could go on the computer, and verify it if you want me to?" 

"No that won't be necessary, unless Liz wants to file a formal complaint about talking during a 100 meter dash. Do you Liz?" 

"No, it wouldn't do me any good anyhow." 

"Go to the computer and send the following message to the ready room Gordon. 

"Montgomarie has beaten Elizabeth in a 100 meter dash by a full body length. Witnesses were Gordon Luck, and Zoie Schneider. The time was 7:35 AM. and no one was drunk." 

"Monty, it was only half a body length." 

"What did you say Gordon?" 

"Nothing, nothing at all. Should I add anything about the wager between the two of you?" 

"What a marvelous thought. Please add that Elizabeth lost $1000 to Montgomarie. You can embellish that if you'd like." 

"I certainly will." 

"Gordon, if you do, you'll have me to deal with." 

Yes ma'am, I would never do that to you Liz. I will be as honest as the day is long." 

Gordon wrote the email, while the women were in the kitchen preparing breakfast and talking. When he finished he sent it, and deleted it from the email program and the computer files immediately. He wasn't going to be in trouble with either woman, until he got to the safety of his home. 

Monty and Elizabeth ate a hearty meal. Zoie ate a light meal because she was going back to bed. Gordon nibbled at his breakfast. Soon they were going buffalo hunting, and he did not want to give back to the earth a lot of what he had eaten. He would do his part, but he was not looking forward to it. 

************************** 

"Mister Mertz this is Vincent Caruso, I am the attorney for Mister and Mrs. Trevelyan. I have power of attorney to start moving money around." 

"Yes Mister Caruso, Mister Trevelyan advised me prior to leaving for Boston that you would call. How may I help you? 

"Tomorrow morning, two armored cars will come by to pick up $80 million. Which banks have that amount of money on hand? I don't want to take it out of your bank, as you will be our liaison for the period of time we will be working together." 

"Montpelier Federal has $25 million total in their vaults. Colonial has $60 million in their vaults. How would you like to handle that Mister Caruso?" 

"Can you possibly handle $5 million more? Who is our fourth bank, and can they handle the extra $5 million. For accounting purposes it would be easier for us to keep the money in as few banks as possible." 

"I know my vault is filled to capacity. Let me call Jefferson Bank and Trust, and I'll see if they can handle the extra $5 million." 

"Okay I'll hang on." 

"Hello, this is Fred Mertz, can I speak to George Jefferson please, it's rather important." 

"Hello Fred, what's tickling your ass this early in the morning?" 

"I have Vincent Caruso on the other line. He's transferring $80 million tomorrow morning. Between the two banks he's pulling the money out of, there is $5 million left over. I can't handle it in my bank; do you have room in your vault for anymore?" 

"As a favor to you Fred, sure I'll take it. I may have to hang it from the ceiling in the vault, but I'll put it in there. What time should I expect it?" 

"I would expect late morning, but I will call you back with an exact time." 

"Thank you Fred, I'll talk to you later." 

"Later George thanks a lot." 

"Mister Caruso, Jefferson Bank will be able to take the extra $5 million." 

"That will be wonderful, would you be sure to have all the paperwork ready for me to sign when I get there." 

"What time would that be Mister Caruso?" 

"As long as the trucks are running on time, it will be between 930 and 10 o'clock in the morning. Would you ask your chief of police if we could have extra security available for both trucks, while we are loading? Naturally we will pay for that service." 

"I will call him as soon as we get off the telephone and arrange it for tomorrow." 

"Thank you Mister Mertz, it's been a pleasure doing business with you." 

***************** 

"As he stepped out of the limousine in front of the Gibson residence, there was another limousine parked in front of him. Inwardly he grinned, because this was going to be fun. The same servant opened the door and let him in. 

Vincent asked, "How were they yesterday?" 

"You shook them up bad sir. I got a five dollar an hour raise." 

"Right this way sir." 

"Good morning Mister and Mrs. Gibson, Melvin. Victor what a wonderful surprise, it's nice to see you again. How are Maryjane and the kids?" 

"Hello Vincent, do you see my receding hairline. That's what the kids are doing to me. Maryjane is the love of my life, but the kids are killing me." 

"What are you talking about Victor, you only have three children, and I have 10. I have a full head of hair, so don't blame your receding hairline on your children." 

Hooter Gibson said, "I'm happy you guys know each other, but I'm paying by the hour, and I don't want you to guys to run my bill up." 

Vincent said, "First of all Mister Gibson none of this is ever charged to the client. We have an ethical responsibility never to charge a client for any personal interaction between attorneys. So keep your shorts on." 

"Yes Mister Caruso, I'll keep quiet." 

"It's very kind of you." 

"Joseph, you finally got out of jail." 

"Yes Vinny, I just couldn't take it anymore. It was just a merry-go-round. We put them in jail by the time you turn around they are out of jail. What the hell is the sense of it? They should bring back the road gangs and start fixing up the back roads of the country. This is nonsense. I've put guys away for 16 years, and they were paroled in three. They say it was for good behavior and overcrowding." 

"Mister Gibson so you know, Joseph, and I went to law school together. He became a state attorney, and I went into practice with Thomas Shackleford, and James Hurst. I did not become a partner until four years ago. 

Joseph finished first in our class. I finished 35th in a class of 40. I'm just happy he's out of that grind, because he deserved better." 

"Are you ready to start guys?" 

"Yes Vinny we are." 

"First with the bad news, and I mean very bad news, because there is no good news. As of tomorrow, our firm is being pulled off this case. The hospital in Montpelier is going to be sued for malpractice. The doctors are going to be sued for malpractice. Anyone that touched Lucy Trevelyan is going to be sued for malpractice. The doctor's at Mass General took one look at her charts and couldn't believe the amount of tests that were not done, and the amount of tests that were done and misread. 

When I said to you yesterday that William Zabo was on the warpath, he is now under sedation. He was ready to kill someone. I am not saying that for effect. He has friends, who have friends that will do anything for him. When I tell you the name of the Attorney's that are replacing our firm, Joseph will know them instantly. Hold on to your seat Joe. They are Simons, Signore, and Ambrose." 

"Vinny, they are mob lawyers." 

"They are the worst of the mob lawyers Joseph, and we both know it. I'm not worried about them, as much as the people that they are going to call in to hurt the Gibson's. They can go to bankruptcy court, and it won't help them. They will be the most accident-prone family known to mankind. Mrs. Gibson could wind up as a prostitute in one of their houses. Hooter will probably wind up running drugs between the states, until he gets caught, and sent to prison. I have no idea what they will do to Melvin, because he caused the accident. I know it won't be pretty, and I don't know if he will come out of it alive. 

"I am going to tell you what William Zabo wants, and this comes from his bedside. His adjutant said, "He wants $100 million more than you have. He doesn't care how you find it, or what you have to do to get it. That is what he wants. I wish we could have come to an agreement yesterday, as I did with the Glover's, and the Ames. At least you would have had an option to keep this house, and had some money left over. 

No, you had to be the smart guy, the know it all. 'Why do I need an attorney for a simple accident? No one will dare convict my son of anything, because I live on the west side of the river.' Well Mister Gibson, it's time to pay the piper. I feel sorry for you. As of midnight tonight, there is not a thing I can do for you. After your act yesterday, I am not sure if I even want to try to do anything for you." 

"Victor, Joseph, that's all I have to say. I don't have any wiggle room. I can try to fight for some, but I know how your client thinks. He will try to hide some money so he can continue living in this lifestyle. The first thing he'd better sign over is the title to this house. We know it's paid for, and there are no liens on it. We want his cars and their titles also immediately. Take charge of all of his portfolios, and get an estimate of what they are worth. If you want me to perform a miracle, I better have all those numbers by 8 PM this evening. I will have to do some very fast dancing to get this done. I will probably have to call Thomas in to give me a hand. He is the best negotiator I have ever met. I'll give you 10 minutes to talk to your clients to see if they will cooperate. I'm staying in a house 10 minutes down the block. Here is my cell phone number, give me a call if there is any progress." 

******************* 

Victor asked Vinny to rejoin them. 

As he entered the room, Vinny said, "I want to hear it straight from Hooter's mouth. I want to see if he's trying to deceive Mister Zabo in any way, because if I hear any deception I'm gone." 

"Mister Caruso, I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot, and that is my fault. When I'm proposing is this, EVERYTHING. I will sign everything I have over to your law firm, and you can give it to Mister Zabo. I'll give you my house, cars, my portfolios, the keys to my safe deposit boxes, and everything I have hidden from the government offshore. I have one request, that he allow my family to stay together. I will go back to work and attempt to raise the $100 million he is requesting. It may take me five, or 10 years to do it, but I will get it for him. We will live humbly, until he is paid. My wife and Melvin will go to work, also, until the debt is paid. That's all I have to say." 

"I was wondering when you were going to mention those offshore accounts. What do you figure your net worth to be?" 

"It should come in just less than $1.6 billion." 

"You are a real asshole Mister Gibson. I settled with Mister Glover for $1.2 billion. He kept his home and has money left in the bank. You had less money than he had, and we would have settled for less from you. I will call it in and ask for it to be approved. I can't guarantee anything, but I will give you my promise that I will do my best." 

Joseph said, "Vinny, I have never had a client offer everything, please put your heart and soul and this." 

"I thought you lost your religion Joe? One client seems to be bringing it back to you." 

"It's the thought of Simon, Signore, and Ambrose getting a hold of them that puts the fear of God into any man, including me." 

"I'll put my tap shoes on, and do my very best for them, and my friend. Give me a room to work in, and make it reasonably soundproof. It's not for my side of the conversation; it's for the yelling that's going to be coming from theirs." 

The servant appeared at the door. 

Vincent asked, "How did he know to come and get me?" 

"I push a button, and a light flashes in the hallway." 

"Do you know his name?" 

"I use to, but I can't remember it now." 

"His name is Aragon, and he is a very polite gentleman. I would get used to it if I were you." 

******** 

"This is Colonel Lucius Canyon." 

"This is Vincent Caruso. We have the absolute top offer from the Gibson's. Everything liquid they have, including their offshore accounts. I am going to use $50 million of it for my own purposes here, as well as the house. This is nonnegotiable. The $100 million you asked for is also off the table. I will not be a party to slavery, and that is what it becomes, if I follow through with it. The top mount should reach $1.58 billion." 

"You may tell them that Lucy and the baby are out of danger, before you tell them it is acceptable." 

"Yes Colonel, it was something I was going to do anyhow." 

Vincent opened the door to find Aragon standing by it. 

"Aragon, come in here." 

"Yes Mister Caruso." 

"How old are you Aragon?" 

"I am 56 years old sir." 

"When you were young man what did you do for living?" 

"I worked with concrete sir." 

"Did you work for union?" 

"No sir, they wouldn't allow me in because of my color." 

"What state was that in?" 

"Boston Massachusetts." 

"Those bastard's, that's against union rules. 

"How old were you when you applied?" 

"I was just out of my second tour in the Navy sir. I was 26 years old." 

"Those bastard's, that's two things they did wrong. You can never turn down a veteran, and you can never reject anyone who applies because of their color. My dad would've had a fit." 

"Your dad was a union man?" 

"Yes he was. He was in charge of most of Brooklyn many years ago." 

"He must be very proud of that you became a lawyer." 

"Yes he is. Let's get down to business. Aragon you are now the proud owner of this home. I can tell by your hands that you have worked hard all your life. It's now time for you to live a life of leisure. I am your personal lawyer from this point forward. If you need anything, you are to call me directly. You will have a personal accountant, who will dole out your money on a generous basis, but he will also make sure that you do not overspend. Tomorrow, you will have $20 million placed in your accounts. The accountant will help you get in touch with my investor, who will help you make that money grow. You are not a very wealthy man, but you are rich beyond your wildest dreams. You will dress accordingly, as well as your wife and children. I will have people help you with that. Your children should be transferred to private schools, where each of them will receive the help they need to excel. I have one more surprise for you, but you will take up your station and listening for that one." 

"Mister Caruso, there is one problem. I don't have a checking account. I could never afford the fees." 

"Before I leave here Aragon, you will have a checking account, and a savings account. Mister Mertz will shake in his shoes every time he hears your name. Let's go inside so I can light some fires." 

Vincent walked into the room with a face of a gargoyle. He didn't sit down; he just paced back and forth. 

"There is no way to tell you this, except tell you straight out. Hooter, you can go to work. How you get there is your own concern. 

Melvin you are going to work. I will tell you where in a moment. 

Dottie you are going to work. I will tell you where in a moment. 

Your wages will be set by your new employer in accordance to your aptitudes, but you will start at minimum wage. 

I have worked out a deal with Mister Zabo's adjutant. You will not see the mob lawyers. You have no idea how lucky you are. 

By noon tomorrow, you will sign everything over to your lawyers, except three things, your house, your cars, and $51 million in cash, which you will sign over to me personally. Be prepared to move out of this house by the following morning. You can only take only what you can carry in your hands. You may not hire a truck or any type of transportation, because you will be leaving here on foot. 

I was also able to get one concession, and my dancing ability must have been the best ever. Mister Gibson you are allowed to keep $100,000 to start your new life. There is a reason for this largess. Lucy Trevelyan is out of danger, as is the baby." 

"Thank God." 

"Joseph, watch out, somebody is going to think you're coming back to God." 

"Vinny I'm going to smack you." 

"It was just an honest statement. You could never beat me up anyhow, I'm from Brooklyn." 

"Go stuff Brooklyn up your ass." 

"Now you have to go to confession for saying a bad word." 

"Baptists do not go to confession." 

"I'll start working on that as soon as you come to work for me." 

"God help me." 

"There you go again." 

"I insisted on one other concession, because it was tantamount to slavery. I would not allow them to charge you the $100 million over and above what you had in assets. After an intense discussion back and forth, I got them to agree." 

"Mister Gibson, my firm will pay your attorney's fees, but I have a little more business before I go. I would like to introduce you to the new owner of this estate. Would you step in here Aragon? 

"Yes Mister Caruso? 

"At noon, the day after tomorrow, you will be the owner of this estate. You will have the title and the deed in your hands. All taxes will be paid, and everything you and I discussed will be taken care of by the end of the following week. I would like to introduce you your maid and your manservant. You will train them in their duties, because they have no knowledge of working." 

"Dottie stand up. Aragon, this is your new maid. She will start out making minimum wage. Your accountant will pay her taxes, and her Social Security payments, directly from your bank accounts. Your accounts will be audited once per year by an independent firm. I will get the results and check them over for you. 

Personally, I don't think you need a Butler standing by to answer the door. What I think you need is someone to take care of your lawn. You will fire the lawn company, and have your new manservant take care of it. 

Melvin, stand up. That will be Melvin's job. From 10 AM to 6 PM, he will take care of the lawn. Your accountant will make sure he has all the appropriate equipment necessary to do a proper job. He will do it every day of the week. I hope he enjoys the tan he will be getting. During the autumn, he will cut and trim the trees, and rake the leaves, so not one of them is sitting on the estate grounds. In winter, he will make sure the driveway, and all walkway areas are thoroughly cleaned, day, afternoon, and night. He will also receive minimum wage. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 27



It will be up to you to decide when to raise their salaries." 

The Gibson's were mute. They were going to be working for a black family. Never in all their years had they thought this was a possibility. 

Joseph, I will pick you up at noon the day after tomorrow. I don't want any excuses from my newest employee. 

"Yes boss, why do I have a feeling I'm not going to like this job?" 

"Because I should have been working for you for 14 years now, but you had to go into public service because you had a sense of duty, and honor, instead of "Common Sense." 

"Fuck you Vincent." 

"There is another bad word." 

*************** 

As good as his word, Vincent Caruso was on his way back to Brooklyn, with Joseph Cummings sitting at his side, on a private jet, talking about the future. 

"How long do you think it's going to take the Gibson's to realize they can quit their jobs any time they want Joseph?" 

"You son of a bitch, I never thought of it. They are under no obligation to stay employed by that family. No wonder your one of the finest lawyers in this country." 

"It took a lot of time for me to see the light, but you must remember, I had two the best teachers in the world. When I didn't have a case to work on, they made me study, and I mean study hard. Then they would test me, more like grill me over an open flame. Some nights we would work until two or three in the morning, until I knew portions of the law I thought I would never use, but I wound up using it to my advantage. Year after year, they worked me like a dog, and I became a good lawyer. After that, they grilled me harder and gave me harder cases to work. They would stand over my shoulder and watch me prepare for the next days' examination, and scream at me as if I was a first grader when I did something wrong. 

Donna never worried where I was. She always knew I was in the office learning. I would come home in the middle of the morning 3 or 4 AM, and I would have a hot meal waiting for me. Then she would say, "What did we learn today?" 

One time I said, "I learned that your husband is an idiot." 

"No he's not, he's done it again." 

"What has he done again?" 

"He's gotten me pregnant." 

Seven weeks later, we found out Donna was pregnant with quadruplets. The doctors were amazed, because we didn't use any fertility drugs. Hell, we already had six kids seven would've been fine. Who expected 10? 

When Tom found out we were having four more kids, he went ballistic. He took out a whip, and said, "Learn the law, or I will whip you to death." 

From that moment on I ate, drank, and slept the law. 18 months later, I was the third best lawyer in the firm. They threw cases at me that they would normally handle, and one of them would sit second chair. I never faltered I never lost a case. One day I walked into the office and wanted to speak to both of them. They thought I was going to leave and opened my own law firm, but I surprise them. I told them I wanted to be a partner, and they laughed at me. 

"Tom said you can't afford it." 

"I said name your price." 

"He said you're serious?" 

"I said name your price." 

Tom said, "What do you think Jim, $100 million?" 

"I'll burn down your fucking building first. $70 million and it's not even worth that. Your only claim to fame is Celeste. Take her out of your equation, and the firm is worth $55 million. You two are going to retire in six years that will make the firm worth $30 million because of its files." 

"How do you know that?" 

"Don't call your secretary into your office when she's working on your financial statements." 

"You sneaky bastard." 

"You're the one that taught me. My offer is $70 million, but it is in cash. Do you want it or not?" 

"Where would you get $70 million in cash?" 

"Thanks to you, my mom has multiple accounts in Switzerland. It wouldn't even have to leave the country. All that would have to happen is for you to go on vacation, and open an account in the same bank. You can do that, or I can bring two large suitcases into the office and give one to each of you. It's your choice." 

"I don't believe you have the money." 

"If you say that one more time the price goes down the $60 million." 

"I want a suitcase with $10 million in this office tomorrow morning." 

"Tomorrow morning I want a contract stating that I am a full partner in this firm. However, I will bring in $20 million, so each of you can have a suitcase. I will open them and show you the cash. I will close them and watch you sign the contract. I will sign it, and Hazel will notarize it in front of us. Then I will hand you the two suitcases. 

"What about the rest of our money?" 

"You tell me how you want it, and you will get it." 

Tom said, "You can't do it. Your pulling our chain." 

"My offer just went down to $50 million. Take it or leave it." 

"Keep your mouth shut Thomas. Every time you open it, we lose money. $55 million Vincent, or you can leave the firm." 

"That's acceptable Jim. Make sure the contract doesn't have any flaws in it. I will read it just like you taught me, and if there any loopholes in it, I will walk." 

"It will be an ironclad partnership contract. Your name will be on the door, under mine, and an announcement will be made in the legal papers, and the local news. The money will not be mentioned, just that you have been raised to a full partner."  

"Thank you, I didn't realize you had the power to muzzle a great Thomas Shackleford." 

"Be careful Vincent, his blood pressure is up about to reach heights unknown to any Doctor." 

**************** 

"The next morning, I walked in with two suitcases containing $20 million in cash. Their jaws dropped, and they never doubted me again." 

"Where did you get the money from Vincent?" 

"It was buried treasure from my father's former occupation." 

"The police, the FBI, and every other law enforcement agency went that house multiple times, and never found a thing." 

"Yes I know, but my father was very inventive." 

"This is your signing bonus. It binds you to our Corporation for a period of five years. During that time, I expect you to relax, and get your head on straight. You will work, and you will work hard, but only on civil cases. I will not let you near a criminal case for that period of time." 

Joseph Cummings looked at his signing bonus and his eyes nearly dropped out of the socket. 

"Do you give all new employees $10 million signing bonuses Vincent?" 

"Hell no, the good ones normally get more." 

"I should throw you out of this fucking airplane." 

"You said another bad word Joseph, but you couldn't throw me out of this airplane anyhow." 

"Wait; don't tell me, I think I know the answer to this one. I can't throw you out of this airplane, because you are from Brooklyn." 

"You see Joseph, your are learning already." 

************* 

"Even, I have a surprise coming your way." 

"Yes I know. Payne is coming to pick up Zoie and take her home." 

"Do you think I would call you on something as mundane as that?" 

"I have no idea what you would call me about Dycke? Is it the new fiber?" 

"We are still having trouble figuring out the matrix on that thing, no less getting ready to test it. Take a look outside your office window, and see what's sitting there." 

I looked out the window and saw a line of tractor-trailers as far as I could see. 

"Okay, what are you doing to me now?" 

"Your bearings are here my friend, about 23 million of them." 

"You are early; you're not supposed to be here until December 1." 

"I know, but I was running out of space to store these things, so I brought them to you. If the spaceship can't hold these, it's better to know it now rather than later. You still have to put 505,000 gallons of water in that thing. These weigh a lot less than water." 

"I should still put you in the nuclear confinement area. I want to see you glow at night." 

"No you don't, who would develop your new fiber?" 

"I would have Holden do it." 

"That's hitting below the belt, because your child could do it. Can I bring your bearings in now?" 

"How many trucks are there?" 

"There are 37, the 38th will be here in a few hours, it blew a tire somewhere in Louisiana." 

"Okay, I'll call security and let you in. The trucks will have to wait." 

"You are very funny Even." 

"Wait for me, I'll be right down." 

I climbed aboard the second truck, as one of our SUVs took point, and led the convoy to the NEST. I had a month to figure out how I was going to load the bearings into The Best Luck and it hadn't even crossed my mind yet. So I called the smartest man I ever knew. 

"What Is It Now Even?" 

"William, Dycke Schneider showed up a month early with my bearings. I haven't figured out a way to load them yet. Do you have any ideas?" 

"Of course Even, I'll send him right down." 

"William I love you." 

"Don't let Jemma he you say that, she will kill you where you stand." 

"I promise I won't say it out loud again, except on the day we depart. Then I will say it loud and clear for everyone to hear." 

"Be very close to the opening of the spaceship, my friend, she is a very fast." 

I will be William, thank you very much. 

20 minutes later, Colonels Lucius Canyon, and Jack Daniels drove up to the site. 

"Doctor Even Luck, meet Colonel Jack Daniels." 

"It's my pleasure Colonel." 

"It's mine also Doctor Luck. How can I help you?" 

"23 million bearings, in the shape of the one inch cylinders showed up one month early. I have no idea how to get them from down here to up there at their insertion points." 

"Am I to understand you built that wonderful machine, and you don't know how to get bearings from here to there?" 

"Yes Colonel that is my problem." 

"Without being offensive Doctor, I could take a laborer off the street, show him your problem, and he could fix it for you. All you have to do is make a scaffold slightly higher than your entry point. You build a conveyor belt with a hopper at both ends. You feed the hopper at the lower end continuously with the bearings. It spreads them out on the conveyor belt and brings them up to the second hopper. The second hopper is attached to a medium-pressure four-inch plastic hose. A man will manually move that hose up and down to get the bearings to fall to the bottom of the spacecraft. Then he will point the hose directly down and time it to see how long it takes to see the first bearing reached the top. He will yell down the numbers how many bearings went into that side, as opposed to how many bearings it took to come straight up. Then we will know how much time the vibrators will need to help settle those bearings in place. 

While that's happening, he turns and starts using the hose on the other side. It becomes a continuous process. If you were in a hurry, we would build as many conveyor belts as you needed and so each port at the same time. However, you said these trucks are here one month in advance, so there is no urgency involved." 

"It goes to show you Colonel, a man can know many things, and not anything at all. I had no knowledge of anything you just said." 

"Doctor Luck, you and your team built this marvelous machine. I would not know where to start. We all have our own little niches in life. That big black balloon of yours is a marvel for the ages. What I just told you about goes back to the Egyptians. The only thing they did not have is the engines we have to do the work with today." 

"Tell Lucius what you need Colonel, and get the best of the best. I don't want anyone getting hurt during this process. You can name your price for your services. Get this job done perfectly, because the 1G rotation on the inside of the spacecraft depends on it." 

"What do you mean Doctor?" 

The earth rotates at 1040 miles per hour at the equator. It is the reason we can keep our feet on the ground while we are in space. It provides our 1G or gravity, as you know it. When you see the astronauts floating around in space, it's because there is no gravity. This wall is going to rotate, and give us that gravity while we are in space, so we don't float around the ship. It will not rotate while we are in stasis, to save the wear and tear on the bearings. I will be the first person out of stasis, and it will be my job to restart that rotation. As soon as gravity is restored, I let the flight crew out, and we work everything by the book from there." 

"It sounds amazing Doctor; do you have a need for an engineer?" 

"I just found out I do. How old are you?" 

"In my heart I am 39, in my body I am 74." 

"Lucius, I have made a lot of exceptions lately, what do you think?" 

"The only family he has is his daughter. She keeps him like a prisoner to babysit her children. I can take care of that easily enough. I believe you need him. You have scientists on board that wouldn't know one end of a shovel from another. Give him the ride of his life, put him in stasis, and keep him alive for as long as you can. He will be invaluable to you." 

"Welcome aboard Colonel Daniels, you will see things no other man or woman has ever seen." 

"How should I pack?" 

"I'll tell you what I have told everyone else; pack a little bit for summer, and a little bit for winter. We are allowed one suitcase each. If I were you, I would buy a big suitcase. 

****************** 

"Payne Schneider was talking with Jennifer Sunday afternoon, when Zoie and Gordon came charging in. Zoie ran to her mother screaming, "MOM!" 

"Hello there how was your trip?" 

"It was fantastic. I know the difference between the buffa-pie and a cow pie, and there are bugs that love to set up home in your hair. I nearly killed Gordon over one of the comments he made because of it. He told me to go soak my head, and I thought he was being nasty, so I jumped him. While I was hitting him, he said it again. "Zoie go soak your head." 

Monty said, "He's trying to help you. Bugs are setting up a nest in your hair." 

"I screamed ran over to the oak bucket and dove in up to my shoulders, while trying to get the bugs out of my hair. I expected Gordon to try to drown being, but he didn't. We learned a lot about each other while we were up there; especially we still have a lot of growing up to do. He loves me so much that he is blind when it comes to me. I will purposely set up traps for him, and he walks into them every time, because he trusts me. Monty had to hit me over the head with a hammer to show me what I was doing wrong when it came to him. I can see why she loves him, and why he loves her. If they were the same age, they would make the perfect couple. 

Gordon yelled, "Are you kidding, she would kill me before nightfall." 

"That's bullshit and you know it." 

"Well will never find out, because I'm not her age, and I never will be." 

"Mom can we talk in the bedroom for a moment?" 

"Payne if you excuse me please?" 

"Sure go ahead." 

"What's up Gordon? What is so secret we had to leave our company?" 

"You must not mention my birthday Mom. Zoie hasn't mentioned it. It may have skipped her mind. She is leaving tomorrow or the next day with her mom, and if someone mentions it before she leaves the tears will start and they will not stop." 

"For the first time in your life, I think you're right about a woman's reactions. This has got to be kept under the rug until she is in the airplane and on her way back to Charleston. I'll speak to Payne and see if we can make the departure time as soon as possible." 

"That would be super mom, the quicker the better." 

"You will never believe my next statement. I guessed Monty's age. Actually, she knocked me out first, because I asked her how old she was." 

"You never ask a woman her age Gordon." 

"I'm only 16 Mom. I didn't know that until Monty knocked me out cold. I apologized, in the morning, when I woke up. Then she asked me how old I thought she was, and I nailed it. I explained how I came to the number, and when I said she was 33. She dropped something in the kitchen, and it broke. 

Liz laughed at her, and told her that the secret was out. The most amazing thing is Monty turns 33 on my birthday. What do you get your best friend for her birthday?" 

"A present for Monty is a little out of my league Gordon. She's built like a Mack truck, so I think anything frilly is out of the question. Did you see her in any night clothes, while you were there?" 

"No, she always came out of her room fully dressed. 

Remember you don't have much time." 

"I know I better speak to dad." 

"He's very busy right now. Dycke Schneider showed up unannounced with the bearings for the second wall. He's working with an engineer now trying to figure out a way to put them into the ports on top of the spaceship." 

"The bearings are here already? They are a month early." 

"Don't look at me; I have nothing to do with it." 

"If I get Zoie's okay, can I go to the NEST?" 

"Henpecked already, and you're not even married. That's a bad sign Gordon." 

"Dad worships the ground you walk on, and you're telling me I'm henpecked?" 

"Get out of here before I spank you." 

"I think I spanked you last mom." 

"Get out of my house, now Mister Luck, before I change my mind." 

Gordon kissed his mother, and said, "Louder mom, I want them to hear it inside." 

"Get out Gordon; I swear I'm going to beat you to death today." 

Gordon went flying through the front of the house, saying goodbye to Payne and Zoie. Jennifer walked into the kitchen moments later. 

"I swear I'm going to kill that boy." 

Payne asked, "Is that before or after the wedding? The bridal gown is going to cost me a ton of money." 

"Just tell me which way you want it Payne, and I will accommodate you. That little runt spanked me again." 

Zoie laughed. 

Payne slapped her hands. "What are you laughing about Zoie? If you spanked me you would be looking at the ground as you went flying over the balcony." 

"Mom you don't understand, the first time Gordon spanked his mom was when she went to buy him condoms." 

Payne couldn't help herself; she began to laugh. 

"How in the world did you get hooked into doing that Jen?" 

"It wasn't easy but they got me. Even was still ill, so he couldn't go. Delicious was sick, and Gray was taking care of her. You just can't ask anyone to buy condoms for your son, so it was left up to me. It turned out to be hysterical." 

"Have you ever had to ask either of your sons how big they are?" 

"Thankfully, I've never had the pleasure." 

"I whispered to Gordon do you know your length? Not only did he answer yes, but he answered loud enough for the people in Houston to hear him. However, I not only had to ask him his length, but I also had to ask him if he knew his width. Again Gordon proudly said 'Yes', and I'm sure the people in New Orleans know that measurement. 

As I found the premium brand he needed, both the box of 100, and the 3 to practice with, his hand close to his zipper he asked, "Should try one on now mom?" 

That was it; I knew I had been had. I screamed. He ran, and I started chasing him all over the store. On the second or third time around, he got behind me, and whacked me once on my backside. I turned around and said, 'GOSL, get over here." 

"GOSL is a name I used to call him when he was very young. It means Gordon Oliver Star Luck. He walked back to me, and in a little boy voice, he said yes mommy. I told him we came here to buy something so let's do this, and get it finished. 

I handed him a box of premium condoms, plus three more to practice with and I told him to read the instructions, and while he was doing it, I hit him and ran out of the store. He chased after me, but the alarms went off, because he had the condoms in his hand. Monty was sitting by the cash register. She chastised him for not paying for the item first. He lost twice, and came out of the store as red as a fire engine." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 27



"You chased him out of the house, where is he going?" 

"If Gordon is not at home, where does he go?" 

"He goes to work." 

"Does he remind you of anyone?" 

"Yes, he is just like his father." 

"When are you leaving for Paris Payne?" 

"We leave Wednesday morning." 

"Oh how thrilling, are you excited Zoie? I've never been to Paris." 

"Doctor Luck has never taken you to Paris?" 

"No he hasn't, we've had a wonderful life together, and traveled all around this country, but we have never gone overseas. Is this your first trip out of this country Zoie?" 

"Do the Bahamas count as another country mom?" 

"Yes Zoie, the Bahamas are a different country." 

"In that case, I've been out of the country once." 

"Are you looking forward to Paris?" 

"My dad showed me the films of my mother getting fitted for her bridal gown." 

Payne screamed, "I'll kill that bastard, I was naked." 

"You were also the most beautiful woman there." 

"You're 17 Zoie; it's too late to flatter me." 

Zoie sat on her mother's lap. "No it's not, because your bridal gown was stunning, and still is." 

"I should have put you on birth control pills instead of breast milk." 

"Who knew mom, who the hell knew? Do you know what else we haven't done; we haven't set a date for the wedding, and time is getting short" 

"What you talking about Zoie, I got my invitation yesterday." 

"You can't do that to me mom, it's my wedding." 

"I can, and I did. You weren't home, and as you said, time was getting short. I sent invitations out to all the adults I wanted there. I have a list of all your teenage friends at home ready to go. You will go through them and decide which ones you want to come and which ones you don't. It should take you less than an hour to decide. We already told you that you're getting married in the same church that your father and I were married in, by the same priest that married us. We rented the largest hall available, and every five-star hotel room available for every adult who is coming. When you look at the list if you have anyone else you want to come let us know, and we will take care of it." 

"Am I allowed to know the date of my own wedding?" 

"If you start getting snippy I won't tell you. I will keep you captive until the appropriate day and make you show up." 

"I will stop taking my birth control pills, and return to the old wonderful me." 

"Oh God, no, I could not handle that again. Your wedding day is December 15 at 3 o'clock. I picked 3 o'clock specifically because that was the time of my wedding to your father. I called him at a 6:45 AM and screamed at him to look out his window. He did and he asked me why I was worried. I told him it was pouring outside and the winds were blowing like a hurricane. 

He said, "Go to sleep Payne. At 2 o'clock the sun will come out, the winds will die down and you won't get a drop of water on your dress. I asked him if he was sure and he said have I ever lied to you. He never has during our entire marriage." 

We will leave the house at 2 o'clock and arrive at the church by 2:30 PM. We will take some pictures to pass the time. At 3 PM exactly, your father will walk you down the aisle to meet Gordon. You will be a beautiful bride." 

"Not as beautiful as you were mom, I looked at your wedding pictures. You were an angel with wings." 

"I'm going to kill you. You turn into a wonderful human being, and you are going to leave me. What am I supposed to do but cry?" 

Zoie kissed her mother's cheek, and whispered in her ear, "You are still a beautiful young woman, have another baby." 

Zoie went flying into the air, as Payne stood up. "Are you out of your fucking mind? A baby at my age, it's not going to happen." 

"Remember mom, grandma did it when she came back from Paris." 

"Thank God I got your father fixed, because it's not going to happen to me." 

"Have you ever thought about buying a jet fighter?" 

"I tried, but the government won't let me." 

"Mom, you are some piece of work. There is another option for you." 

"I know I'm going to regret this. Okay Zoie what is my other option?" 

"You could have the boys draw one up and have dad build it for you." 

"What a marvelous idea. Why didn't I think of it? It would open up a whole new engineering, and industrial field for your father to tackle. He would be in seventh heaven. Zoie you are brilliant." 

"Mom, did my mother just call me brilliant?" 

"Savor it honey; it won't happen very often." 

"Come on everyone, we're going to the NEST." 

"Richard, Holden, we're going to the NEST. If you are going to blow anything up, at least it won't be the house." 

Holden replied, "Mother, we are not using any explosive materials, yet. When we are, we will go under your bed, because your mattress is the heaviest." 

"Do me one favor Holden, make sure I'm not sleeping on the mattress when you do your first test. I'd like to be alive for your second test." 

"If you're not nice to us we won't build Mrs. Schneider's hypersonic airplane. We've already decided it will be a Uniframe construction. It won't have wings or a tale, and the engines will be above the body of the airframe." 

"We only talked about that possibility five or six minutes ago Holden. How could you put that much work into something in that period of time?" 

"It's not like we hadn't thought about it before mom. It's just that we were busy on another project, and no one else had an interest in that type airplane." 

"You must not mention this to anyone outside our family. You don't know how dangerous your knowledge is." 

"Yes we do mom, we've already talked to dad several times about it, and we know our lives will never be normal. Our lives will be just like his, CRAZY." 

Jennifer smiled at her youngest. "You're right Holden. My three children are just like their father, CRAZY AS LUCK'S!" 

*********** 

Gordon nearly forgot to follow one of the paths safely across to the spacecraft, and nearly found himself eight feet down in sand. For the last six feet, he did a high wire act, trying to balance himself on the very edge of the path to get safely to the other side. When he made it, there was a round of applause from all the agents who were watching him. He stopped and politely bowed to his audience. Then he ran directly to his father and hugged him. 

"Hello dad, I'm back." 

"It would seem so. Did you learn anything?" 

As they walked away from everyone, Gordon began to talk about what happened between him and Zoie. He saved the juiciest stuff for last. The most important thing he told them was not to mention his birthday in front of Zoie, and the reasons why. He went into the skinning of the buffalo, cutting off the meat, which would be aged and eaten by the ranch hands and her parents over the next 4 to 6 months, and how Monty brought religion into the whole process of man's early survival. 

"I sent requests to all 19 members of the Deep Space Project before I left. Have you received any replies yet?" 

"Yes I have received 19 replies." 

"What was the result of the vote?" 

"There were 10 yes, and nine no votes, with one vote outstanding." 

"You are the one that hasn't voted yet." 

"That's correct. This is a very big decision to be made." 

"Monty is only 33 years old, she fits the profile. What is your problem?" 

"I'm not at liberty to say. I've seen Monty's file, and she is a superb human being. The world should be filled with her, and it would be a much better place. She has one problem deep in her soul I will not talk to you about, and you must not talk to her about ever. That's the reason I have not voted yet." 

"I asked her if she wanted to go on this trip with us. Her face lit up like a Christmas tree, and she said in a heartbeat. Maybe she wants to run away from that place in her soul. Give her that chance dad, I need her there, I want her there." 

"I know Gordon; we have time, please give me the time to think." 

"Okay, what are we doing with the bearings?" 

"Colonel Canyon introduced me to Colonel Jack Daniels. He's an engineer. He had the problem solved in a minute. We're going to build a scaffold, put a conveyor belt on it, and use a medium pressure hose to blow the bearings in. Dycke brought 23 million of them with him, and if we were pressed for time, we could use eight conveyor belts at one time to blow in the bearings. Since he's a month early, we are only going to use one conveyor belt, and more manpower. It will probably take two weeks to get the job done." 

"Not to rain on your parade dad, but where are we going to get 505,000 gallons of purified water and get it pumped into the spacecraft in the last two weeks before liftoff?" 

"I will tell you if you promise not to laugh at me." 

"Why would I laugh at you dad?" 

"When we placed the order for the water the man at the other side of the telephone fell off his chair, because he was laughing so hard. He broke his elbow." 

"I didn't know taking orders for water was a hazardous occupation." 

"Apparently ordering 505,000 gallons of pure water is." 

"All right dad, I promise I will not laugh at you." 

"If you do, I'm not going to tell you that your mother owes the pretzel jar $180, but you didn't hear that from me." 

"I swear dad I won't say a word about my mother or about the water. This is going to be so much fun." 

"Are you ready?" 

"Yes dad I'm ready." 

"Here I go." 

"You're doing this to torture me." 

"Have you ever heard of the town called Idaho Springs?" 

"Our Idaho Springs, the one with our laboratory in the basement, and your sister's monument by the house, that Idaho Springs?" 

"Yes that's the one I'm talking about." 

"I didn't know anyone there could count that high, except Rod, and he moved." 

"Well I placed it through Idaho Springs so they would make a profit from the order. I'm sure you've heard of the Coors Brewing Company." 

"No." 

"Why do I keep forgetting you're only sixteen?" 

"I will be seventeen the end of next week." 

"Well, to put it in a nutshell for you, Coors is going to ship by rail 505,000 gallons of purified water to us over a one-week to ten day period. It will be offloaded at the Texas Southern Railway station into large tanker trucks and brought here. We will pump it, using cranes holding an eight-inch hoses that will be attached to the frame of the spacecraft. There will be four of these in use at all times. 

There is a matter of a wedding in the middle of this procedure, but we have very able-bodied people handling this. No one will think about working or rushing back here to make sure it's going correctly, because it will be going along correctly. We are not indispensable, not me, not William, not Stephano, none of us are indispensable, there are others that can take our place at a moment's notice, and they will." 

"Dad, my heart will be in the wedding, I..." 

There was a bloodcurdling scream and all eyes turned towards the pits. Agents were running, Gordon and I were running, anyone with in the sound of the shout was running towards the sound. When we got there, Jennifer, Payne, and Richard were all looking into the eight-foot hole in the ground. 

Jennifer yelled, "I told you to stay single file, while we were on the path Zoie." 

"You are going to be minus one son mom. I was telling Holden how deep the pit was, but there was soft sand at the bottom so you wouldn't hurt yourself when you fell in. Guess who wanted to test that theory out?" 

I said to my youngest, "Did you really do that on purpose?" 

He nodded his head in affirmation, and smiled. 

"If you wanted to find out why did you take Zoie with you?" 

"I just thought if she was wrong, she might as well get hurt along with me." 

I looked at Payne. "You can't argue with his logic, it's flawless." 

"Dad, did you know there are ants down here? 

Zoie jumped up and started brushing the sand and tiny ants off everything she could find. 

"It only makes sense that there are ants down there Holden. 30 percent of what you are laying in is beet sugar, and ants like sugar a lot." 

"Can I have some too?" 

"Absolutely, all you have to figure out is which grain is sand, and which grain is sugar. They are both the same color, texture, and weight. The only thing that makes them different is where they come from. The sand comes from the beach, and the sugar comes from a vegetable." 

Zoie yelled, "Is school closed yet, I'd like to get out of here." 

Gordon said, "Could you move a little to the left Zoie?" 

As soon as she did, she screamed again. Then she started hitting him, because he just jumped into the hole. 

"Young miss, what did we say about hitting?" 

"You just scared the shit out of me Gordon." 

"That's no reason to hit me, so stop doing it." 

"Okay, I'll try, I'm sorry." 

"Send down the ladder please." 

Zoie raised her hand to hit him again, when he grabbed her hand. Yes miss, how can I help you?" 

"You could've come down by ladder, instead of jumping, and breaking your neck?" 

"Yes but I would not have had any fun doing it that way. Now step on the ladder and I will be two steps behind you while you climb up. If you slip don't worry about it, because I will be right behind you grabbing your ass." 

"Pervert." 

"You've known that for a long time. Now climb before I put my hand under your skirt." 

"I'm wearing slacks dummy." 

"There are ways, and then there are ways. Climb little girl, there's a pervert behind you." 

As soon as she was close to the top that arms reach out, grabbed Zoie, and brought to safety. 

Gordon slid down the ladder and grabbed his youngest brother. 

"Holden these steps are spaced too far apart for you to climb up by yourself. I'm going to put you on my shoulders, and tie your legs with my belt and loop it through my arms. I want you to hold onto my head, and lean forward. Will you do that for me?" 

"I'd rather hold on to your ears, they are bigger." 

"As long as you hold on all the time and lean forward, you can do it." 

"You have a deal brother." 

"Up we go, is that too tight on your ankles?" 

"A little, but I like it that way, it makes me feel secure." 

"Lean forward big guy, we're going up." 

Before the ride began, it was over, and Holden was being scolded. He was unhappy with this part. 

"Mom it was only a test. I wanted to see if Zoie was lying to me." 

"There had to be a better way to find out." 

I walked up behind my wife and hugged her. How would you have done it dear? Someone tells you there is a trap, but at the bottom of that trap is soft sand so you won't hurt yourself when you hit the bottom. It doesn't make much sense to me, because if you're catching an enemy, you really want him hurt so he can't hurt you anymore. Right? 

Jennifer agreed. 

However, as Colonel Daniels explained it to us, if the guy is dead you can't get any intelligence out of him. If he's injured he uses up all your medical supplies. The best way is to let him fall into a cauldron he cannot get out of, but will not get hurt when he hits the bottom. Do you understand?" 

"No not really Even." 

"Okay, let's try it like this." 

It took us less than a second for us to hit bottom, but the laughing must've gone on for an hour. Jennifer took off her heels and chased me around that eight-foot circle, until she was exhausted. I also think she suffered from lockjaw, because of her yelling. When she reached the top of the ladder, she tried to kick it so I would fall back in. All that happened was she nearly fell back into the pit behind her. I don't believe she would've been happy with that result. It was a fun Sunday afternoon, and we were all starving at the end. 

When Dycke finally joined us he said, "What the hell did I miss?" 

Zoie jumped into her father's arms and said, "Daddy you missed one hell of a good time. We're going for dinner would you like to go with us?" 

"You folks look like you're having more fun than I am, so I guess I will." 

Holden grabbed Dycke's hand. "Aunt Payne wants to fly a jet fighter, but they are too slow. I'll have mommy send you a drawing next week to see if you can make an airplane without a rudder or a tail. It will be like a lifting body. I will start working on the engines, as soon as I have the body correct. However, they will sit on the back of the aircraft and will provide lift as well as stability. Gordon's new fiber will be wonderful for the top of the fuselage and back to the engine pods. However, I believe you are going to need my Uncle Gray's fiber for the undercarriage, because it will absorb heat much better. Moving at 4000 miles per hour, we can expect the skin to reach 1000 degrees before she reaches 120,000 feet. It will cool down to about 800 degrees while she's in level flight, and build up again as she begins her descent." 

"How long have you been working on this Holden?" 

"I guess about 12 minutes." 

"Don't you look at me that way Dycke? This is the first I'm hearing about it." 

"Holden tell me about this new project of yours?" 

"The Air Force won't let Aunt Payne have a fighter jet. So I figured I'd build her one, only better. Theirs are too slow anyhow." 

"If her airplane is moving at 4000 miles per hour, she won't be able to turn, because of the G forces." 

"You are living in the wrong century Dad. I'll show you how well she'll do it when we get home. Will" 

My friends and family were laughing hysterically at my expense. My five-year-old son had just sucker punched me, and I winced in pain. He must have noticed something was wrong, because he left Dycke and ran over to me. 

"Did I say something wrong daddy?" 

I picked him up and said, "You said something so right, it was perfect." 

"Why is everyone laughing at you then?" 

"Whose spaceship is going to be bigger, mine or yours?" 

"Mine is daddy." 

"There is something your sister said many years ago, and it is very appropriate: For Those Whose Shoulders We Stand Upon. Do you know what that means?" 

"No, not really daddy." 

"It means my spaceship is small but we made a lot of discoveries building it. Your Uncle Dycke made the shell through hard work and testing. Your sister discovered how to defeat gravity. She also discovered the Ion/H2 engines. Your brother discovered nuclear fusion. 

The Germans invented the first jet plane, and it flew at about 500 miles per hour. Now we have jet planes that fly at close to 1600 miles per hour. You just said they were too slow. 

When you were playing with Newton, the other day, building the engineering section, did you have to discovered the fusion engines?" 

"No because Gordon already did that." 

"Did you have to discover how to defeat gravity?" 

"No because Delicious already did that." 

"Where would you be right now if those two items had not been discovered already?" 

"We wouldn't be anywhere, because we have no way to get off the ground." 

"Now listen again: 'For Those Whose Shoulders We Stand Upon.' Do you understand now Holden?" 

"I get it now dad. I get to build my dream, because someone else is letting me use theirs." 

"Exactly, someone learned how to build the wheel. Why would you go back and reinvent it. Use it, and build something new, and exciting." 

"I think I will begin working on transmitting sound faster than the speed of light. Maybe you can send me a birthday message next year." 

"Holden, I don't doubt that you could do it. People said I couldn't transmit sound around mountains, and I became very rich because I did. You do what your dreams tell you to do, and don't worry about the money. It will be the accomplishments that will draw people to you and help you build bigger and better dreams." 

**************** 

Lucius walked into William's office with a smile on his face. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 27



William said, "Where is my gun, you never smile unless you're going to kill someone." 

"No sir, my mission in Montpelier was accomplished much more easily than I had anticipated thanks to the use of your name. It never would have happened that way without it. I would like to present to you this check for $500 million, in appreciation for your help." 

"Lucius, I need more money, like I need a mistress to mess up my life. Why don't you use it wisely, because after December 25 and a lot of people will be unemployed, unless they want to stick around, and help with Holden's new project, which could take 10 or 15 years to get off the ground. I won't be here, but Junior will be. I am going to recall him for December 1, and have him put an administrator in charge of our Shanghai operation. If there is any fall off, I will have him sell the operation, and that will be the end of it. What is happening here is much more important. I have to show him how important it is, and transfer almost everything to him. Patrick will inherit a great deal also when he comes of age, and I hope the both of them will join together and become a force greater than the parts of what they own. You have enough money, I have seen to that. I don't want you to get any part of this. Divide it in equal measure from the bottom up. The secretaries will need it more than the highly paid scientists will. Patricia can do the breakdown for you in the matter of minutes, and she also can keep her mouth shut." 

"How many times have I told you in my life that you are the smartest man I have ever known? You are also the most philanthropic man I have ever known. General Morgan will never know how grateful I was that he kicked me out of the service at the exact time you were looking for close body protection. It was the most fortuitous moment of my life. I gained a lifelong friend, and a man I would do anything for." 

"You have proved that to me time and time again Lucius. Even through some of the ugliness of life, you never wavered when I needed you." 

"I must admit sir there was the funniest thing that ever happened also. There was the day we scared the vice president of the United States to shit in his pants." 

"Yes, that was fun, even though he continued to annoy us for a while, that was fun." 

"I will speak to your daughter, and have her breakdown the amounts for each person on our payroll. I know she won't take any money, and neither will Mrs. Luck." 

"What are you going to do with the rest of the money you collected?" 

"I was going to donate a large part of it to make an addition to the hospital here in Temple that is named after my mentor and his wife. Then I was going to spread it around to the people that work here as they became unemployed from the bottom up. I thought it would make a soft landing for them." 

"Where would you get such a ludicrous idea Lucius?" 

"My friend, the smartest man I have ever known, taught me very well sir." 

"Get out of here before we both start crying. I will sic Jemma on you if you do that to me." 

"Oh no anything but that sir. I have seen Jemma in action, and I want no part of her wrath. Have a great day William." 

"You too Lucius." 

************* 

130. Notifying the Winners 

On October 15, every employee's name, who had requested a chance to go on the trip into space, was put into a blank envelope and thrown into a garbage can. A similar garbage can was taped top to top together, and then shaken for 30 seconds. This was done for scientific accuracy. 

The garbage cans were untapped, and the envelopes poured onto the floor. Stephano was blindfolded, and in front of him, he had a list of all the secretaries in the building. They spun his chair around moved the pages out of order, and told him to begin. He now had to call 20 names to pick out the 20 winning employees that would join the crew of the Best Luck. He started and pointed to the first secretary's name, and his aid called out, "Kathleen Moses." 

A cheer went out as if she won the lottery, but she was only going to pick up an envelope. 

Stephano continued through the next 19, and each secretary received the same response. 

They picked five alternates, and marked them as A1 thru A5. Stephano removed the blindfold, took a black pouch, and asked the secretaries to put their envelopes inside it. He asked that the remaining envelopes not be destroyed, but kept in the boxes provided. 

Everything was completed just after 2 PM Friday afternoon, and the secretaries headed back towards their desks. 

Stephano asked, "Where are you going? You have the rest of the day off." 

There was a loud cheer, and several women started charging at him to say thank you. 

He ran to his office, closed, and locked his door for safety. 

The hard part was over, now came the easy part, opening the envelopes to see who won, checked the computer to make sure they met the qualifications, and notify them. It took him an hour to do it, and he was amazed 14 of the 20 winners were women. Seven of them were technical analysts, four worked on the interior framing, two were secretaries, and one helped install the elevators. This was an eclectic group, and would be very helpful if things turn sideways in space. 

You couldn't have chosen six better men if you wanted too. A frame inspector, two men who helped to install the exterior panels of walls number one and two, an electrician, and a computer technician." 

As he looked at the list of winners again, it looked like they were handpicked. Then, he realized that the talent level of this phenomenal undertaking was so high, you could arrange them in a circle, throw a ball in there, and have a highly qualified person catch it. 

He and the computer fill out the names and addresses of the winners on the Golden envelopes, place them in next day mail envelopes, and put them in his outbox. The instructions were simple enough: 

Congratulations, you have won a trip to the stars on the Spacecraft 'The Best Luck'. Upon receipt of this letter, you have 10 business days to respond, In Person, to Mister Stephano Valentino for further instructions. If you do not appear, your space will be given to the next person in line. 

The following Tuesday there was a line down the hall from Stephano's office. I walked into his office and asked him if he killed my daughter." 

"I should be so lucky, but she's the one with the gun, and knows how to use it. These are the winners of the spacecraft contest, and not one of them is going to be a waste of space on the trip. Look at their qualifications dad, for the luck of the draw, it was amazing." 

As I perused the list, I couldn't believe it. "These people are all fantastic. I know them all, including the two secretaries. One of them is Williams', she will be dancing on the ceiling today. Let me call her name, and see where she is in line." 

I walked into the hallway and asked for quiet. It became like a morgue instantly. 

"Is there a loser out here by this name of Sagan Child's?" 

Her scream could have broken every light bulb in the building as she charged down towards me. 

She wrapped her arms around me, and said, "Doctor Luck, I'll do anything you want on that ship. I am so excited to be going." 

"That's what I needed to talk to you about Sagan. Mister Zabo said he wouldn't know what to do without you, so you can't go." 

"I'll kill that bastard first. I'll be right back." 

"I'm just joking with you. Everything is fine." 

"Doctor Luck, you just found a good way to die." 

"I just wanted to make sure you really wanted to go. Your application was just a little iffy." 

"How do you apply for a position to go into space? There are no qualifications, except that you are breathing. I'm breathing, and I want to go." 

"That's good enough for me. Ladies, gentlemen, why don't we reassemble in the cafeteria, so Mister Valentino can do this once and get it over with quickly." 

"I hate you Even, I didn't think about that. I was going to do it one at a time." 

"That's what you get for going to Penn. You should've gone to a good school." 

"I think I'll take the rest of the day off. If this is what it's going to be like at 9:30 AM, I don't want to be here at noon." 

************** 

As she snuggled up against Adams' back, Laura asked, "What did you learn today?" 

"I learned I should have been born with blinders on, and never looked up into the sky and seen the stars. I never would have wondered what goes on up there, and I would have been much better for it." 

"Come on Adam, it can't be all that bad." 

"Baby, shit is supposed to go downhill not uphill. I've been working in plumbing since I was 17 years old, and now everything I've ever learned is working in reverse, because gravity is not there. Let me change that. Two walls away, there is gravity, but where the plumbing lines are, there is no gravity. Through some magical means, everything that collects in the plumbing lines goes to the top of the ship, not to the bottom. When it gets there, it doesn't want to come out of the pipe, it wants to stay there. You have to check how much waste is in each side of the pipe connectors. You have to put a larger plastic bag on the valve opening, and seal the bag around it. Then you return to where the waste ends, and seal the next valve below it. You cross over to the other side of the ship and do the same thing. You open a low-pressure valve and blow all of the waste into the plastic bag, leaving the low-pressure valve on, so the waste doesn't flow back into the pipes. You heat seal the plastic bag, close the valve, and hurry back to turn off the low-pressure valve. If you don't do it quickly, the pipe will explode, as it did to me today. Then you go back and open the two valves allowing the waste to flow normally again. You are finished, except now you have to get rid of the waste, which you have to bring to a tube, which is two levels down. You mustn't forget you are in an area of the ship that has no gravity. So the waste can go one way, when you wanted to float another way. You also don't want the bag to puncture and leave a stream of waste floating around the interior of the ship. After you have successfully transited down the two levels, you open the hatch, which looks like a torpedo tube, you put the waste in the tube, heat-sealed end first, and close the door. You open the exterior hatch, push a button and a high-pressure burst of air pushes the bag out into space. The waste instantly freezes and becomes a meteorite. 

However, if you forget, and put the waste into the tube, with the heat seal side facing the ship, you'll be cleaning that tube out for about six hours. I've done that too." 

Laura kissed his neck, his jaw, and his cheek. 

"Are you tired baby?" 

"I could sleep for a week." 

"Do you want to make love?" 

Adam turned over, newly revived. 

"Hell yes Laura I want you desperately." 

"December 26 isn't that far away. Keep trying Adam I'm still here. I've never been this close to a man in my life." 

Adam grabbed her, and kissed her hard. 

"That wasn't fair Laura. That was cheating and you know it." 

"I'm just trying to give you the will to succeed Adam. I've never wanted a man. I never thought I would be interested in a man, and I don't know why. Why I went you with you that day I will never know. Normally, I would have screamed, but there was something about you that was totally different. If you want me to leave and go back to my mother while you work on this problem, I will. You will sleep alone, and have a cold breakfast. Tell me what you want me to do, and I'll do it." 

"Please don't leave me. You are the only thing that's keeping me going. I don't mind working hard. I've worked hard all my life. It's just everything is backwards, and I can't get that out of my head." 

"Adam close your eyes, and put your hands under your ass. I can't trust you with this, because it's going to be too tempting for you. I want you to think about us making love. Where would you start making love to me?" 

"I would start by kissing your face, your lovely face." 

"Now think the opposite, because you know the most erogenous zone on my body is my feet. You can get me hotter than a tropical rainforest by playing with my feet Adam, play with my feet, and suck on my toes. I am the reverse of any woman you've ever met. They want their breasts played with. I want you to play with the heels and the insteps of my feet. I want the inside of my calves tortured by your teeth and tongue. I want to explode as you reach my knees. When you bite the outside of my thighs, my panties leak because I have exploded more times than you can count. You have me where you want me, but you are going to torment me more before you give me what I want and need. You bite the soft flesh of the inside of my thigh and work your way up to where my sodden panties would fall apart with just one bite. I beg you, but you proceed down my thigh, bringing me higher and higher as I explode so many times in succession I can't think. I'm finding it hard to breathe. You love that my body is the reverse of every other woman you've ever been with, because I am a challenge to you. My legs are my top, and my head is my bottom, when you make love to me. We are a perfect match, a duo made in heaven. You reach for my foot as I am in the throes of an orgasm that rocks my body to its very core. You destroy my panties. You lift my legs and kiss each calf as you work your way up towards my knees to torture me even more. You bite me, kiss me, as I writhe on the bed. You proceed up my thighs, looking at your target, and this time you and I will not be denied. 

You dive in as a man who has not eaten in a year. You dine on my flesh, but you know your real target is higher, and you must get there. You abandon me as I am screaming, and work your way up to my breasts, which are excited and pointy. Without your previous help, they would have been lying flat against my breasts, waiting to be titillated for hours, before becoming excited. 

Finally, you arrive at my face, which is in neutral. You can't figure out why I am not excited. Then you remember, I am unlike any other woman you have ever had sex with before. Do their feet ever look excited? I don't believe so. So the spaceship you love, and the woman you love are backwards Adam. The top is the bottom, and the bottom is the top. The top is the bottom Adam. The bottom is the top. You have to get to the bottom of everything, just as in Sherlock Holmes mysteries, but the bottom is at the top, and the top is at the bottom. " 

Adam was so engrossed in her story, he never felt her take hold of him, and begin moving his enlarged penis up and back slowly. She did it in cadence with her story never for one second missing a beat, speeding up or slowing down. She had never touched a man before, or seen a pornographic movie. The only information she had was from her sister Anna, and she hoped she was doing it right. 

As she was ending her story, Adam's back arched. His hands came out from under his ass and grabbed hers. 

He screamed, "Harder, faster, faster and a few seconds later, Adam screamed, and squirted semen everywhere." 

Laura screamed, "Holy shit," and did the wrong thing. She ducked, when she should've back peddled. She wound up with ribbons of semen in her hair, and on her face. 

All Adam could do was laugh. 

"Thank you Laura, I needed that desperately." 

"Look at me, I'm a mess." 

"When you play with fire, you are going to get burned." 

"This is not funny. I had no idea there would be so much stuff coming out of you. Look at you. You are a mess too. The bed is a mess. I am a mess. It's 2 o'clock in the morning, and you have to get up at 5 o'clock. Go take a shower, I'll change the bed." 

"You never slept in a bed with cum on it before?" 

Laura glared at him. 

"I guess not. Let me help you with the bed. You can shower; I'll clean up, and get a few hours' sleep." 

After they finished changing the bed, Adam said, "Laura, why did you do that for me?" 

"There is a good possibility Mister Schiff that I love you. I am a good storyteller, and I want to help you. I told you that story to help you think in reverse. The other may have happened accidentally or not. I've been looking at you, and wanting to touch you since we decided to sleep together. I didn't know how to do it properly. My only frame of reference was my sister and her interaction with her boyfriend. I was afraid I'd hurt you, I am happy I didn't. When my mother saw you, with your pants around your ankles, she said I was going to have a very happy marriage. I didn't want to do anything to destroy it." 

"Trust me Laura, you didn't, you made it better." 

"Does it always come out like that?" 

"No, but just wait until I try to get you pregnant. You will gain 10 pounds that night." 

"Braggart!" 

"We're going to have dinner first right?" 

"Yes." 

"I'll just make sure you drink a lot of water." 

"Adam go take a shower." 

"Come with me." 

"Adam, you will become too tempted, and I'd have to kill you." 

"I promise Laura, no funny stuff. I'll even wash your hair." 

"No funny stuff or I will hurt you badly." 

"Hurry up I have to leave for work at 5:20 AM, and I don't want to walk with a limp." 

"You won't walk with a limp; you'll walk away holding your balls." 

"You're mean." 

"Please remember that while were in the shower." 

"Please remember I'm human, and I love you." 

"How human?" 

"I'll let you know in the shower." 

"You get one chance at this, and one chance only." 

"I'll take it." 

"I was hoping you'd say that." 

"You are the most confusing woman I have ever known." 

"You are the only man I have ever been in bed with." 

"I guess that makes us even. Madame shower, now." 

"Does that mean I have to take off my clothes?" 

"Are we going to talk until 5:20 AM?" 

"That's what I was aiming for." 

"You have 20 seconds to get into the bathroom. After that I'm carrying you there." 

"Adam, you already know you can't win." 

"Yes, but I could always try." 

"I like a man who takes a hard fall for a woman, gets up, and is ready to take another one." 

"My neck only hurts a little from the first one. If you hit me again, try the shoulder or the arm this time." 

"Come on Adam, let's go to the bathroom. I can hurt you just as easily in there as I can in here." 

"How about your clothes?" 

"You are desperate aren't you?" 

"I didn't get any toys for Christmas." 

"Turn around." 

"What is the sense in my turning around?" 

"I've never undressed in front of a man before." 

"Let me undress you." 

"God, Adam you are looking for a slow lingering death." 

Adam walked over to Laura and before she could blink, unbuttoned the first two buttons of her blouse. 

"May I continue?" 

"Yes." 

He pulled her blouse from underneath her skirt and unbuttoned it completely. He turned her around and took it off her shoulders. He placed it over the chair in their room and walked up behind her. He put his arms around her middle, and kissed her neck. 

"May I do your skirt?" 

"Adam, right now I wish I was at the ranch, that's how nervous I am." 

"I promise nothing is going to happen that you don't want to happen. You say stop I stop. If I feel you tensing up, I stop. I am not playing around with some girl I will never see again, I'm with the woman I want to spend my life with, and I hope she feels the same way about me. If it's too soon, I'll take a shower, and you will take a shower after me. We will meet in bed." 

"Adam, I like that idea." 

"Okay, I'll see you in a few minutes." 

"I love you Adam." 

"I love you Laura." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.

133. Tears

The night before she was scheduled to leave with her mother, Zoie was holding on to Gordon for dear life. They didn't make love; no, they couldn't make love, because all she could do was cry. She wasn't going to see him until their wedding in December. She was miserable.

"What am I going to do without you Gordon? All I wait for every day is for you to come home from work so I can see, touch, smell, taste, and hear you. I'd rather go to my wedding like that woman from Star Trek. You remember, Deanna Troy's mother went to her wedding naked, because it was her planets custom."

"I'm sorry baby; I must have missed that episode. I thought they weren't allowed to showed naked people on television."

"You must have been the most deprived child in the entire world. Did you see any Star Trek episodes, or movies?"

"I saw two of them. I always thought of myself as Mister Spock. He was the smart one; the captain always got them into trouble."

"What was the captain's name smart ass?"

"His name was Captain Clerk."

"Kirk, you idiot, James Tiberius Kirk."

"Is that why you failed to trigonometry, you were watching television?"

"I see what you're doing. You are trying to take my mind off my leaving tomorrow. Will you write to me?"

"Have you ever heard of Skype?"

"Who is he?"

"Have your mother open a Skype account. You and I can see and talk to each other every day."

"Really, we can do that?"

"The last time I lied we nearly broke up. I will never do that again, and neither will you. This morning, before you leave at 8 o'clock, I'm going to give you a present, and you will remember it all the way to Paris, and maybe longer."

"What is it? It's not another diamond, is it?"

"You don't like the diamond that's on your finger now?"

"If you try to take this one off me, you will be minus a hand."

"What would you like as a present, when you get back to Charleston?"

"That's easy; I want you to be there."

"You know that's not possible. We will be fitting out the ship, and making preparations to leave. No one will be leaving here, until the last possible minute to go to our wedding."

"Mister Luck, it might be a good idea for you to contact all the women going on this trip, find out what birth control pills they are on, and store up a lifetime supply. I've already talked to my mom about it, and she said no. She wants you to find out what I'm really like."

"Zoie, you didn't need birth control pills, you needed sex, and tons of it."

She started crying again, and through her tears she complained, "What am I supposed to do about that while I'm gone?"

"What do you tell me to do about that, when you're angry with me?"

"I can't cut it off, I don't have one."

"I'm mighty pleased that you don't, because if you did it might mean you aren't a woman."

"You are a pain in the ass Gordon."

"How would you know, I haven't been there yet?"

"I talked with Delicious, and that's all Gray ever talks about when they are playing around. She calls him a pervert, and he says absolutely."

"Delicious is too tied up inside herself right now to think of anything like that. I don't know what's wrong with her, and I wish I could help her. If she could get lost in her math or science again, it might do the trick. Everything she's done has been so perfect; all she can do is sit back and wait for lift off, just like me."

"Why don't you make something go wrong?"

"Are you out of your..."

"Knock, knock, is anyone in there?"

"I'm going to have to run this by my father. If I'm still alive afterwards, you are going to receive roses every day you are away."

"You mean I wasn't going to get them anyway?"

"You were only going to get the thorny part to show you how much I missed you. Now I'm going to send you the flower with it."

"That's very nice of you Mister Luck. I would save the thorns, and have you sit on them when I got home."

"Come on you, it's 5 o'clock in the morning. It doesn't appear that we are going to get any sleep. Let's go look at the stars again. I will not make any disparaging remarks this time."

"You will, but I will hit you every time you do."

"No Hitting."

"Is biting allowed?"

"What do you think?"

"I think we're getting boring."

"Are my parents boring? Are your parents boring?"

"No, but my father has his business, and my mother has her airplane."

"While we are in space are you going to sit there like a bump on a log, or are you going to learn about the systems that make the ship move through space. One day you could take over for me, Gray, Delicious, James, Willie, or even the bridge captain. All you have to do is apply yourself, and work at it. We are going to be away for generations. We could be alive for more than 200 years, and during that time, we are going to experience wonders no one can imagine. We are also going to work out like bandits to keep in shape, and I love your shape."

"You make it sound like so much fun Gordon."

"That is exactly what it's going to be baby. When you asked Monty about the people moving west, this is it. They went places no one else ever went to, and saw sites never seen before. Imagine the pictures we are going to send back to earth. The scientists are going to have images from close up of planets they only see as dots. How would you like to see Enceladus from 5000 miles, rather than 391 million miles? How would you like to be the first to land there, analyze the air, the briny water, and see for the first time if there is any form of life on the planet? Any form of life, from bacteria, to acid-based, to life forms that use photosynthesis to repopulate their species. That would be worth the trip alone. However, it is only the beginning of our trip, not the end."

"If you don't stop talking Gordon, we will never get outside."

"I'm sorry Zoie; I sort of get carried away when I start thinking of the possibilities of what's out there."

"Really, I never noticed that before."

They held hands as they walked out the front door, and the agents said, "What are you guys doing up to this morning?"

"Zoie couldn't sleep, so we are going to take a walk and look at the stars."

"Going there is not enough; you have to look at them?"

"We are trying to figure out which one is going to be home."

"I have no doubt that you are going to find it Gordon, no doubt at all."

"I have the point Abe, you pull up the rear."

"I've got it Wes."

***************

The kids didn't return until nearly 7 o'clock, and when they walked in the door, two irate parents accosted them.

Payne yelled, "Where the hell have you two been?"

Zoie replied, "Walking."

"We've been scared to death. We didn't know where you were."

"Why didn't you ask the agents outside Mom? We had two of them with us all the time."

Jennifer blushed. "I didn't think of it. Normally when you leave, you sneak out."

"Zoie is leaving with her mother to go to Paris today at 8 o'clock. Why would I sneak out, and foul up all the planning?"

"Because you're Gordon Oliver Star Luck."

"That's not fair mom, and you know it. Should I go up to Alaska, find dad's friend, and see if we could find a tree to back into?"

"I'm sorry Gordon. Payne and I were a little anxious this morning, when we couldn't find the two of you. We thought you had eloped."

Zoie and Gordon looked at each other and laughed.

"We tried that one on you already mom. We would have to find something new to torment you."

"Very funny little girl, I have you in my airplane for 12 hours, and strange things can happen when you are over the ocean."

"Yes I know. Gordon taught me how to use the Automatic Pilot, GPS, ALS, and SAT-MAP system last night just in case something happened to you, and the co-pilot. I'll have no trouble landing the aircraft."

"Just how did you do that Gordon?"

"I broke into Gulfstream's G-650 database on my laptop. I showed her which switches to touch, and not to touch. I showed her the GPS controls, the satellite map controls, and the Automatic Landing System. I told her at what altitudes to put down the landing gear, when to pull back on the throttles and hit the brakes. It's not like the old days when you actually had to know how to fly an airplane. Now any 6-year-old can fly an aircraft."

"I'm going to kill him Jennifer. I don't have to go to Paris to buy a gown. There isn't going to be a groom."

"Mom did you tell Mrs. Schneider how long I've been training with Monty?

"Payne he may be a pain in the ass, but don't test him. He could hurt your ass badly."

"I'm use to it, Dycke uses a ..."

"Go ahead mom say it."

"I'm not, and if you do, you are not going to live to get married."

"Can I fly the airplane?"

"Do you have a license?"

"No, where can I get a learner's permit?"

"Zoie by the time you are ready to fly a jet aircraft, you will be so far out in space that jets won't work, because there is no oxygen."

Zoie started jumping up and down and clapping her hands.

"Can we take one with us Gordon so I can learn how to fly it, when we find a planet with oxygen?"

My booming voice came down the hall.

"No, but you can bring a bicycle."

"Good morning dad."

"Good morning everyone, has everyone had breakfast already?"

"No dear, we were looking for two runaways."

"Who ran away?"

"We thought they did, but they only went for a walk."

"Did you tell anyone you went for a walk Gordon?"

"It was 5 o'clock dad. We took two agents with us, and we returned just before seven. We didn't think any we did anything wrong, because we were back in plenty of time for Mrs. Schneider to leave with Zoie at 8 AM."

"Did you check with security dear?"

"No, I forgot."

"I would suggest we all have breakfast. Then let Zoie shower and change for her very long trip to Paris. Then Gordon and I will go to work."

"What about us dad?"

"Good morning Holden, Richard, what are you boys doing up so early?"

"We wanted to ask Gordon a question about the fusion engines, before he went to work."

"Go ahead guys, anything you want I'll give you."

"You know how long the sarcophagus is for the engine. We wanted to know if we could make the engine circular so we could use a circular containment unit and create more space in the engineering section."

"Why are you asking me such tough questions at 7 o'clock in the morning?"

"Because you're going to give us the answer at 2 minutes after seven in the morning."

"Go ahead Gordon, get out of that one."

"I can't dad, they got me. The answer to your question is a tough one. I've had to think long and hard on it. Yes, you can, but why would you. The space you save longitudinally, you will take up vertically."

"We can build stuff on top of the containment units?"

"Amazingly, that's why they are called containment units. They do not let radiation escape into the neighboring areas. You could put the baby nursery on top of it and nothing would happen to the baby. Of course, the mother would kill you for doing it, but if you could survive that you are in pig heaven."

"I told you it would be alright."

"No you didn't, you thought the same way I did."

"Boys no fighting, you're going to give me a headache. Do you want breakfast?"

"Yes please."

"Why are you boys back working on the engineering deck? I thought it was finished."

"It is, and it isn't dad."

"Now there's a definitive answer if I ever got one. What's going on boys?"

"We were playing around with Aunt Payne's hypersonic aircraft last evening for a few moments. I looked at Holden, at the same moment he looked at me. We believe we have stumbled onto a way to give us better lateral control on the spacecraft than the Ion/H2 engines. The Hypersonic engines are not air breathers. They are much more powerful and efficient than the H2 engines. The design capabilities are endless, and they can even be swiveled to back you up."

"Where would they be stored Richard?"

"On initial takeoff they would be rolled up inside the ship. Once you are in zero gravity, they would come out both sides of the spacecraft, deploy like solar panels, and locked into position. 

Holden, I think I will just came up with something else they can do. On the top of the engines, we could put solar panels to collect energy."

Jennifer said, "Even, our three children are scary."

"I'm happy I'm leaving two of them with you. You may be able to catch me in a few years. I'll leave breadcrumbs along the way."

"Did you have to bring that up during breakfast?"

"I'm sorry baby, it hurts me too."

"On another note, I have sent out a notice requesting applications for a senior scientist to take over for me to help develop 'Spaceship Two.' Holden, Richard, you two will always have the right to fire, whomever I hire if he is not doing his job properly. When the two of you come of age, with your mother's permission, one of you will take over that position, and move that person to a scientific position, or remove him completely. 

A corporation cannot have two heads, only one person can lead, and the other must make sure that the leaders wishes are followed. Moments ago, Richard came up with an idea to put solar panels on top of the hypersonic engines. It's a marvelous idea. When you go back to your rooms and start working, heaven knows what you two are going to come up with today. That's what I want to happen in the future. I don't care who the head of our Corporation is, or who is next to him, I always want you to working together as brothers. You must promise me that you will keep that promise forever.

"We will dad, always, and if you leave us breadcrumbs out there, we will find you."

"Thank you boys, I couldn't be happier for myself, your mother, but most of all for the both of you. 

 The most important person in your lives will be your mother. She will have total control over this project. She will listen to you, and do what ever you ask of her, as long as it refers to science. As far as your actions as you grow up, and become young men, she is in absolute control of you two, just as we were in control of Gordon as he grew up. Do you remember when we had him paint his room?"

Richard said, "Yes dad, he did a lousy job."

"You're right; he did do a lousy job. However, whose room was it, and who had to look at it every day?"

"He did dad."

"Did he fix it?"

"Yes he did, but only before Zoe moved in."

"Isn't it amazing what love will do to you?"

"I don't know dad, it hasn't happened to me yet."

"I'm very happy about that Richard. It happened to Gordon at age 3. Actually, he had a harem, Danielle, and Brandy."

"Thank you for that dad. My fiancé is sitting there, and now she wants to hit me with the table."

"A cast iron frying pan would do Gordon."

"I was at my father's wedding, and everyone was having a good time. Dad dressed me to kill, and I was irresistible, just like now."

"Dad, kill him before I do."

"Son, if I were you I would tread very lightly on that subject."

"My fiancé has no sense of humor dad. I will work on that with her."

"Your mother and I have been married for nearly 10 years. I've been working on her sense of humor since we met. I failed miserably. I suggest you follow my lead, and back off."

Jennifer smacked me on the back of my head. 

"It's 13 years you numb numbskull."

"Do you see what I mean Gordon; she has no sense of humor."

"I have a wonderful sense of humor thank you. However, your sense of humor does not qualify as funny."

"Whatever you say dear."

"You are in as much trouble as your son is Even."

"Would you like to have a fourth son dear?"

"You stay away from me."

"We will discuss it for a long time tonight."

"I'm sleeping with Holden."

"That's funny, so am I."

"My bed is not big enough for all three of us."

"Don't worry Holden; I can work magic, just like you."

"Can I watch you do magic?"

Jennifer said, "Oh Crap, I'm in trouble."

"Why not Holden, this will be very educational for you. I'll leave the lights on so you can take notes."

"Thank you dad."

I couldn't understand why I got smacked again, but I did, and very hard. Everyone else at the table laughed at my expense. Honestly, I didn't think it was fair."

"Payne have you decided when your leaving?"

"We will leave for Austin at 8 o'clock. We will stay at the hotel for a few hours, and get some rest. At 3 o'clock, I will leave for the airport to begin the systems check on the aircraft. Our departure time is 5 PM, and Zoie will be on board, on time."

"Where else would I be mother. Gordon is going to be at work."

"Oh gee whiz, I forgot about that."

"Mother if you don't stop that I'll finish that sentence for you."

"I'll be good."

"So will I mother."

"Are you going straight through to Paris are you stopping at Charleston?"

"It all depends if Dycke has finished his work here or not. If he has, I will refile my flight plan and stop at Charleston overnight. We will leave for Paris the next morning. If he's not finished, we will fly straight through to Paris."

"You're leaving in less than an hour, don't you think you should call him and find out?"

"If he wants to go home, he will walk through that door any moment, and cause havoc."

"Dycke is the most mild-mannered person I know. The only time he gets excited is when I give him a new fiber or plasticene compound to turn into a miracle product."

"Trust me Even that man can cause more problems in a minute than any other person alive."

"That is not the Dick Schneider I know."

"Zoie am I wrong?"

"When my dad was a runner he was the best. Since then, his feet go in eight different directions at one time. That's because his mind works that way now. He's juggling so many balls at one time, and he keeps them all straight in his head. The only thing he can't do, is walk, and keep a conversation going, without tripping over his tongue."

On cue, Dycke walked in the front door.

"Good morning everyone, am I too late for breakfast?"

Zoie said, "I'll make it for you dad."

"Never mind, I'm not hungry."

"Daddy, you may not live to walk me down the aisle."

"Could you make it something simple please, like hot water and some catchup?"

"I could drive an SUV, and back up over you accidentally 10 times."

"How are you going to do that without rolling over me going forward?"

"I would make a wide turn around you to set up my new position each time. I wouldn't want to wrinkle your pants going in both directions."

"Dycke, she has been doing so well. Why are you antagonizing her?"

"I have a simple answer for that dear. She antagonized me for 16 years, and now I am getting even with her."

"Daddy, I'm going to be living with you for almost 2 months. What do you think might happen if I stopped taking my birth control pills?"

"No, anything but that. I will be on my best behavior. I promise I will not say another word to antagonize you. Please do not stop taking those pills. I would jump off the balcony willingly, if you do."

"Were you really that bad Zoie?"

Payne replied for her daughter. "No Gordon she was not that bad. She was much worse than anything you can imagine."

Gordon put his arm around his love, and kissed her.

"It's not possible. Zoie does not have an angry bone in her body."

Dycke spit his coffee out all over the table.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



Zoie yelled, "Daddy, stop that this instant. What would you like for breakfast? I will make it for you. You are going to walk me down the aisle, and you will be alive when you do it"

"If it's not too much trouble, can I have a bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich on toast?"

"How would you like your eggs? Do you want it scrambled, over easy, over hard or sunny side up?"

"You know how to do that now?"

"Jennifer taught me how to cook. I am a really good cook because of her help, thank you."

"Really Jennifer, she knows how to cook?"

"Zoie cooks dinner for us every other night Dycke. She has made my life much easier, with the kids running around trying to blow up the house."

"Mom, Richard, and I are not playing with explosives yet. When we begin using them, we will tell you."

"I think that's very kind of them Jennifer. At least you will know when you will not have a roof over your head."

"Don't fool around Dycke. They did Payne's hypersonic aircraft in six or seven minutes. They did the entire engineering section of Spacecraft 2 in a few hours, with only one flaw, which Teddy fixed. Between these two, and Newton, I don't know what the world will look like in 10 years."

"Here's your breakfast dad. Since you didn't answer my question, I put one of each type egg on your sandwich, separated by cheese and bacon. I cut it into quarters, because there should be enough cholesterol to clog at least eight major arteries."

"I thought you said I would live to walk you down the aisle?"

"I didn't say you had to eat it all, did I?"

"Gordon, what did you do to my daughter? She even knows how to debate with an adult."

"If you can't debate in this family Uncle Dycke, you will never get a word in at the dinner table. My dad makes sure we all have to join in, and these two runts are great at it."

"We are not runts. I am five, and Richard is 10."

Dycke said, "That's right, next week is your birthday Gordon."

There was a collective yell, 'NO.'

Zoie screamed, "Oh God, I forgot your birthday. I'm going to miss your birthday."

She screamed again, and ran to their bedroom crying."

Gordon said, "Don't worry about Zoie; I've got her under control."

Dycke and Payne looked at him as if he was insane. No one controlled Zoie, no one, except maybe God, and she had to be having a good day.

As soon as Gordon was out of sight, Payne yelled at her soon to be dead husband.

"How could you do that? Everyone knew to keep his birthday a secret so Zoie would leave without thinking about it. Another 25 minutes and we would have been gone. Thanks to you, she will be a basket case all the way to Paris and back."

"No one bothered to tell me about this secret. I didn't know. I feel like an idiot now, but it would've been nice if somebody told me."

"You didn't tell him Payne?"

"He's been so busy this week, and we have barely seen each other."

"Well then, we can't blame Dycke for this incident. We have to blame it on a lack of communication between the two of you. Let's hope Gordon can pull off a miracle."

**************

Gordon walked into their room to find Zoie crying on their bed. In his most authoritative voice he said, "I want you to stop that this instant."

"I can't, I feel like an idiot."

"If you don't stop crying Zoie I will go outside and walk away. You will not be able to say goodbye to me either."

"I don't care, I forgot your birthday, and I didn't get you anything for it."

"How can you say that to me? You give me 'you' every day. You give me your love and affection every day. You give me comfort and companionship every day. We talk for hours about anything and everything and I love it. You fill my heart with joy, and love like no one else in this world can. How can you tell me you didn't get me anything for my birthday? How wrong can one person possibly be? How wrong can you possibly be Zoie? 

Look at this morning, we walked and talked for two hours, and I can't remember one word we said. It doesn't matter, because I was with you; the only person in the world I want to be with, the woman I love, and adore. You are the woman I want to spend my life with, and you are giving up your life and friends here on earth just to be with me. How can you tell me you didn't give me anything for my birthday? You give it to me every single day. Something wrapped in a pretty package means nothing to me. If I don't have you, I have nothing. 

However, since I am the wonderful person I am, I bought you a going away present. I have it wrapped in pretty paper for you to admire, and then tear apart to see what's in it. I will give it to you after you take your shower. Someone smells a little stinky. I believe now would be a good time to take care of that little item.""

Zoie raised her hand to hit him, but he caught it in time.

"You could have made that sound a little nicer."

"Did you want me to tell you that you smelled like a buffa-pie?"

"No, that wouldn't have worked either. I'll take a shower and be right back."

"Remember to take your clothes off."

"Are you looking for a beating this morning Mister Luck?"

"No Hitting!"

"There has got to be a way to get even with you."

Gordon smiled, "There sure is."

*****************

Zoie walked back into their room wearing her robe, and a little towel on her head in the form of the turban.

Gordon said, "I want to look at you one last time, before you leave me."

Zoie threw her robe at him, as she did a pirouette.

"You are stunning Zoie, positively stunning. I was the luckiest man in the world when you fell in love with me."

A tear form in her eye, but Gordon kissed it away.

"No more crying. This is a happy day. You are going to get your wedding gown, and we are going to get married soon. We may be apart for a few months, however after that; we will be together for the rest of our lives. How many couples can say that, and mean it."

"I love you so much Gordon. You make my heart sing."

"Would you like your present now?"

"Yes please, because we are running out of time."

"I think everyone will understand if we are running a little late."

********************

Payne said, "In a little while you will hear my darling daughter scream. Don't worry about it. She is being introduced to one of the many pleasures of married life. My parents were introduced to it by their parents, and I was introduced to it by my parents. My husband was introduced to it by his parents."

Dycke's eyes opened wide. "You have to be kidding me."

"No, I took him to the sporting goods store myself."

"Would somebody care to explain to me what is about to happen?"

"It was a tradition in both our families Even. The bride is introduced to the paddle, before her wedding day. Five smacks on each cheek, and it brings her to heel. After a short period of time, she gets to hit the groom. It becomes a game between them."

"If you look at the size of Even's hands, he doesn't need the paddle. He covers both cheeks of my ass with one swat."

Payne said, "You are one lucky woman."

"Yes I am."

****************

Zoie reached under the bed and found a huge box. It was wrapped in gorgeous paper with two huge bows on top. She loved it instantly, and jumped on Gordon to thank him.

"Baby if we start that, your parents will come in here and take you away bodily, while you are still impaled. Let's open your present, and I hope you love it, because I know I did, when I purchased it for you."

The paper was so pretty Zoie didn't want to ruin it. She started taking the tape off one piece at a time, until Gordon said, "We will be here all day if you do it that way."

She attacked the paper and ripped it into shreds. She pulled the top of the box off, only to find layer after layer of tissue paper inside.

"This is one of your games Gordon. You put a small box in here, with another diamond in it. It's probably a necklace, so I'm going to have to go slow to find it."

Gordon got off the bed, and stood behind her. He kissed her neck and said, "I can't hide anything from you can I? You know me so well."

Layer after layer she slowly searched for the little box containing her necklace. As she reached the bottom of the box she screamed, "NO!"

"Yes!"

Gordon picked her up by the waist and said, "Your mother was kind enough to show me the right size, shape, and density. She said you listened at her door long enough to know how she was disciplined and how she disciplined your father. It is fun sometimes, other times it is painful. This time it will be painful, because you are not use to it. You will receive five swats on each cheek, and they will smart for several days. I hope you enjoy them as much as I will give them to you."

"You bastard."

"You know both my parents, so it's not possible. Don't get me angry, because I may hit you harder than I anticipate hitting you."

"Do I get to hit you?"

"In due time you get to hit me. You can ask your mother about the rules. She said something about getting even with you for listening at her door."

"Somehow I knew she was going to do this to me."

Gordon trapped her legs between his, and pulled her arms behind her back to keep them under control.

"Are you ready my love?"

"What do you think asshole?"

Before she knew it, her right cheek was on fire and she screamed.

"Am I still an asshole?"

"Fuck you."

Her left cheek joined her right, and the pain was excruciating.

Gordon did not ask her any questions as he continued with the second through fourth blows. He was not putting any power behind them, because he did not wish to hurt her. The way she was reacting, you would think King Kong was hitting her.

"Am I still a bastard my love?"

"No, you are the love of my life. I will never defy you again."

"Why did you just lie to me? Both you and I know that you will."

"I just want the pain to stop."

"There is only one more to go, and you've done very well. When that is over, I will put some cream on your backside that will help the pain go away. I have not hit you with any power at all, and I never will. This is for fun, and not for punishment. Are you ready for the last one?"

"Yes."

He hit her on both cheeks, and had her stand up.

*********************

"Didn't that sounds wonderful Dycke?"

"It seems like the boy has talent with the paddle."

"Jennifer, you must make sure when Gordon packs, the paddle goes with him."

"Don't worry about it Payne, I may use it on another male in the Luck family."

I said, "Why is everyone looking at me? I am always the perfect husband, and Jennifer is staying here."

"Dammit, I forgot about that, but I still have six weeks to get even with you Even."

******************************

"I'm going to make you feel better now Zoie."

He began kissing and licking the reddened areas of her tender ass, until she started to sway. He turned her around spread her legs and attacked her center. Her clit was hiding under its hood, so he attacked it vigorously. Licking and sucking on the labia the surrounding area. It didn't take long for it to come out to see what was happening. As soon as it did, Gordon sucked on it, and nipped it gently.

Zoie screamed. This was part of the spanking she did not expect as her going away present. However she was not going to refuse it either.

Gordon had become an expert at bringing her to orgasm and she was closing in on one. He put two fingers of his left hand at the entrance to her vagina, and as she grabbed his hair, and raised up on her toes, as a preamble to her orgasm. He pushed both fingers into her. As soon as he felt the rough patch on the top wall of her vagina, he began rubbing fiercely.

When Zoie couldn't take it anymore, she pulled on Gordon's hair until it hurt, and screamed in orgasm.

She still had one problem. Her fiancé was not finished with her. He pushed her, onto the bed, put her knees over his shoulders, and attacked her with his mouth, and hand again.

Zoie was still inflamed by her first 'Big O', and it was not going to take her long to reach the second. Her hips were helping his tongue and fingers make contact to all the pleasure receptors inside her of vagina. All she could see where the colors of the rainbow spinning in her head.

Gordon had one more treat in store for her or was it for him; he wasn't sure. He wet two fingers of his right hand, and began running them between her cheeks. He would pause and play over her crinkly star, but she never seemed to notice or move his fingers away. He continued wetting his fingers, and the crinkly area, until they were both saturated, and waited for the explosive moment.

Her clitoris was redder than a chili pepper, and his continuous biting of it was not helping her situation. The rubbing of her G spot was taking its toll on her senses.

Finally, she reached sensory overload and began screaming, "oh God, oh God, I'm cuming, I'm cuming."

As her hips left the bed, and her mouth opened to elicit the first sound of her orgasm, Gordon shoved the two fingers up her virgin ass. The scream that would have reached the top of the musical scale, now breached it, and a whole new musical scale would have to be introduced.

Zoie lay on the bed, in the halo of her hair. She was wearing a smile as wide as the Mississippi is long.

******************

Jennifer said, "That didn't sound like a scream of pain emanating from the end of the paddle Payne. I believe my son may have subdued your daughter in a totally different manner."

"He only told us he had Zoie 'under control.' He didn't say how he did it."

**********************

As she returned to the here and now, Zoie looked into Gordon's smiling eyes.

"Are you feeling better now baby?"

"Yes, much better, but my ass still hurts."

"Turn over, and I will take care of that also."

He opened a tube of Voltaren analgesic gel and spread it gently over her reddened cheeks. After a few moments, Zoie said, "You better give me that stuff to go away with, it's taking the pain away."

"I fully intended to give it to you, plus one more tube, just in case the pain lingers longer than I expect. I think you have to go to the bathroom, and clean up again. Afterwards, we will think about dressing you for your trip."

**************

"Are you ready to go?"

"Yes I am, but I'm not sure about my rear end."

"Do you think shoes would be good?"

"Gordon, you are truly a pain in the ass."

"This time I have the paddle to prove it."

They marched to the kitchen holding hands, and Zoie still had a smile on her face.

Payne looked at her daughter and was amazed.

She asked Gordon, "What planet are you from?"

"I don't know, but I sure hope to find out."

Dycke said, "We are running late people, we have to leave."

"Considering the upheaval in the house this morning, 8:02 AM is not very bad."

"Dad, you ate the entire sandwich?"

"No, I gave half to the dog."

"We don't have a dog dad. You better go to the Doctor when we get home. I shudder to think what your arteries are going to look like. Did you enjoy it at least?"

"I was so hungry; I would have eaten a brick."

Gordon said, "Aunt Payne would you like to borrow this?"

He showed her his new paddle.

Payne grabbed it, and Dycke yelled, "Goodbye everyone, I'll see you in December."

He was out of the house four feet in front of his wife running for his life.

"My mom swing's a mean paddle."

Zoie went around the table kissing everyone goodbye. They were walking towards the SUV when she said, "I can't leave without saying goodbye to Delicious."

"We have time Zoie. Look down the street, your father is still running away from your mother."

"My dad is still faster, but with that paddle in my mother's hand, he has the incentive to run faster still."

They walked across the street, up to Delicious door, and were about to knock, when she opened it.

"Good morning Zoie, Teddy told me you were coming."

"Isn't it wonderful to have an early warning system of your own?"

"I don't know Gordon what do you think?"

"I think she's the most precious thing God ever created."

"Gray and I agree with you. Ever since she told him how to fix the problem with that fiber, he doesn't stop playing with her."

"Do you realize how rich our brothers are going to be, because of these two fibers? Dad believes in 10 years or so they will replace steel in the building process. If you think of the ramifications of that, not only in the building industry, but in the way of pollution control, and the use of coal and other fossil fuels, it could bring it down by seven or eight percent on its own."

"Harold, and Patti's process is working phenomenally in cleaning up the atmosphere, and now this. One day, the skies will really be blue again, permanently."

"Zoie, we have to leave soon."

"I'll be there in two minutes dad. Did mom catch you?"

"I will never be slower than your mother. Ouch dammit, that's cheating. I will get you tonight when we get home."

"I'll look forward to it."

"Your mother and father are weird."

"You just spanked me, because of my mother, and you're calling them weird?"

"You just spanked Zoie?"

"It's a long story sis. We just stopped by so she could say goodbye to you, Gray, and the kids. Let's make it quick, before her parents bring the paddle over here."

"Newton come here, Zoie wants to say goodbye."

"Goodbye Zoie, I will be at your wedding in December."

"You better be, or I'll come here, find you, and beat you up. I want you in a tuxedo just like your dad."

"Okay, what's a tuxedo?"

"Your mom will tell you."

"Let's go find my other two children."

There they were, in Teddy's bedroom, lying on the floor. Gray would roll to the right, and Teddy would follow him. Gray would roll to the left, and she would do the same. Gray said opposite. He would roll to the left, and Teddy would roll to the right. Gray said handstand. He went into a handstand, and miraculously so did Teddy. They went down on the floor and rolled around a few times, and Gray said, "Stand on head." Gray went into a handstand, lowered himself onto his head, and put his hands out to the side.

Teddy looked at him, went into a handstand, and very shakily, put her head on the floor, and her hands out to her side.

Gray said, "All fall down, and Teddy rolled onto her back laughing."

Everyone's standing at the door applauded.

Gray picked Teddy up, tickling her belly, and making her laugh. He brought her over to her mother, who was not amused.

"We have an acrobat in the family dear."

"If she hurts herself, we are going to have a eunuch in the family dear."

"Isn't mommy funny Teddy?"

"Daddy, Teddy have fun."

"Zoie came to say goodbye. She's going home today."

"Zoie home tomorrow. Engine go sleep."

"We have many cars Teddy. She can take another car."

"One engine sleep, Zoie home tomorrow."

"Okay say goodbye with a big kiss."

"Pretty dress, like mommy."

"I hope so Teddy, I really do."

"Gray, tell Payne what Teddy said. I have a bad feeling about it."

"So did I babe. I was already on my way."

****************

Payne saw Gray approaching, and went to say goodbye. After a quick hug and kiss, Gray didn't let her go.

"Payne, Teddy said something strange, and most of the time she's right. Actually, she's right all the time. She said that Zoie's not going home today. She's going home tomorrow. One of your engines is going to sleep. In my mind, it means something is wrong with one of your engines. Before you take off, would you please check both engines out very carefully? I don't want anything to happen to the three of you. It would devastate us if it did."

"Gray the engines were just overhauled less than 700 hours ago. They are good for another 29,000 hours before they even have to be looked at again. These are Rolls-Royce best, and I can't believe anything could be wrong with them."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



"We've both seen new airplanes fall out of the sky, because a nut or bolt was not tightened correctly. I'm certified to fly anything in the air, except that monstrous A380 Airbus. So humor me, and check under the hood."

"Okay worrywart, I will do it just for you."

"It's not just for me; it's for three people we hold very dear."

"We feel the same way Gray. We will see you in December."

"You better keep that promise."

*****************

"What was that all about Payne?"

"Apparently Teddy feels that one of the engines on my aircraft has a problem. I'll drop you off at the hotel, and have a maintenance crew check them out, while I'm there."

"Mom, Teddy is freaky that way. A few weeks ago, she told her dad there was a problem with the egg. They didn't understand what she meant until she told them it was the egg at the NEST. They figured out what she meant because she couldn't say the word, but the spacecraft was unbalanced and everyone ran there. Even ordered the flight crew on board along with a bunch of other men, and was able to get the spacecraft in the air, before it tipped over. The whole program would have been lost if it wasn't for Teddy."

Payne said, "I think I'll check those engines out really good."

"I believe that's an excellent thought dear."

***************

As they were driving down to Austin, Zoie whispered to her mother, "How often am I allowed to put this stuff on my backside?"

"Are we suffering dear?"

"Because of you I am."

"I guess you never listen at my door again, will you?"

"How else was I supposed to learn? You would never talk to me."

"I would never talk to you? You would never listen to me. If you remember, you had an attitude problem that a tank couldn't get through."

"Yes, I remember, and I'm sorry. I do love you and dad you know, especially for not throwing me off the balcony, which many times I know I deserved."

"Well, you did help us with one thing."

"Really, what was that?"

"Once your brothers went away to college, they never returned home."

"Mother that was awful."

"It is also the truth. Your oldest brother had no interest in engineering, so your dad wanted to put him in charge of the golf course, the restaurant, and the banquet facilities. He said yes immediately.

Dad said he could live at home, until he got his feet on the ground.

Your brother asked if that was a prerequisite for the job, because if it was to count him out.

Your dad asked him why.

Zoie still lives there."

Your dad replied, "I understand completely. I'll get you an apartment in one of the other buildings."

"You know I'm going to kill Jason."

"No you're not, because he was correct at the time. He was correct until the day after we put you on birth control pills. Remember who you were, and who you are now. You are two totally different people. No one, on our side of the family, is going to recognize this Zoie Schneider on the day of your wedding."

"If I could take it all back on I would, but I can't. What am I supposed to tell them? How do you explain to people that it was a chemical imbalance that no Doctor picked up on?"

"You do it just that way baby. You apologize for your behavior, and tell them the doctors finally found a chemical imbalance in your blood they were able to correct."

"Can we get back to my main problem? My ass is killing me, how often can I put this stuff on it, and why did you tell Gordon about the paddle?"

"I'll answer the second part first. If I hit you with the paddle, you could sue me for child abuse, and send me to jail. If I let Gordon do it for me, and I get 16 years of frustration out of my system by listening to you scream. What he did to you afterwards should have turned off all your pain receptors for quite a long time as you recovered from your orgasm.

"Was I that loud?"

"I believe the people in Cleveland heard you."

"I'm going to have to do something about that while were in space. Everyone is going to be living right next everyone. There isn't going to be any privacy at all."

"You're right, but you will get use to it. Remember, you can change your mind up until the point where they take off. Gordon will go, with or without you. His life was preordained."

The second part of your question is in the very fine print. It's almost so fine you can't read it. However, it says once every six to eight hours. How badly are you suffering?"

"I feel like my ass is on fire."

"I'm sure these gentlemen would love to see it, but when you get to the room, you can put some on, or have your father do it for you."

"Oh yeah, that will be the day. I can see him with his cell phone, taking pictures as he is spreading the cream over my buttocks, and emailing it back to Even, and Gordon."

"Your father would never send those pictures to Even, and Gordon, at least not right away. He would have them blown up to wall size posters first. He would send them overnight, express mail; and have them hand delivered to both of them. Then he would wait for their phone calls."

"Are you sure he wouldn't have one of our crews fly it down?"

"There is always that possibility, depending on the quality of the photo."

"Did you ever destroy the films of those four girls you hated in high school?"

"Oh God, how and what did you hear about them?"

"I heard it the normal way, by lying down next to your door, and listening to you and dad talk. I know it had something to do with sex and you had them all on film. Dad put them through college, and I will tell you I was and I am very confused about that. If you hated these girls, and you had some sort of sex tape of them, why would dad put them through college?"

"Where is that damn paddle when you need it?"

"Mom, you don't have to say a thing. I'm leaving soon, and never coming back. If it upsets you so much just leave it, and we don't have to discuss it."

Payne knocked on the privacy glass to get the attention of one of the agents.

"Yes Mrs. Schneider, how can I help you?"

"Will you please contact the other car, and tell my husband that Zoie is coming with me to the airport."

"Yes ma'am, I'll take care of it."

"You know shortly after I was born we were in a terrible car accident and my face look like chopped meat, until I was nearly 17 years old. Your father and I were engaged when he received his inheritance. Before that, he didn't care about my face he cared about me. 

While I was growing up, I had a few on-and-off friends. As soon as they turned 16, and could drive, they were no longer my friends. Now they had boyfriends galore, because they were really beautiful, each and every one of them. They turned on me, and even became vicious at times. At other times, they just ignored me. 

When your father came into his money, he said to my dad, let your insurance company pay whatever they want, I will pay for the rest. The rest of those expenses were over $500,000. It took a long time for me to recover. They had to put me asleep for a month, so I would not make any facial movements. If you subtract 22 years from this face, that is how beautiful I came out of the operation. I was ecstatic. My parents cried, my entire family cried. Your father thought I was going to leave him, because I was so beautiful, and he was so plain. There was nothing further from the truth.

I was so beautiful I became the queen of the school. Everyone wanted to be around me, instead of the usual cliques. 

I ignored everyone, except your father, and your soon to be Aunt Cynthia, who was dating your Uncle Steve. Your dad picked me up in a limousine every day. 

As we approached prom season I came up with this idea. These four girls wanted desperately to get back into my good graces. Through my best friend, your Aunt Cynthia, I hatched this plot. I was going to take these four girls, and their boyfriends, on an all expense paid vacation to Bermuda for an extended weekend right after the prom. I picked them, because I wanted to get even desperately. 

When we got to Bermuda, I took the four of them shopping on Saturday morning to the most expensive stores in the hotel. I let them buy anything they wanted. They thought I was the nicest person ever for forgiving them for being nasty to me all those years. We went jet skiing for hours that day, until their boyfriends finally joined them later. When they finally got hungry, we took them to the best restaurant on the island. Your father tempted them saying they could have anything their hearts desire it as long as they won any of the bets they would make. Three of them wanted top-notch Porsches, and one wanted the cash equal to the highest price Porsche. Your father readily agreed.

Your father is a master of deception, and his agents were top-notch. They helped us in every way possible. They told us how to stay out of video coverage, and how to entice these girls into our trap. 

We had the best video cameras and sound equipment. The biggest suite in the hotel, and the best of everything. We had the girls make bets against us, they were sure they could not lose. However, three lost two of the bets, but Jessica lost all three bets. I got her, and I got her good. 

Your dad told them we knew they would never show up and receive the consequences of the bets they lost, and at 7:01 PM, we would go out to dinner and dancing for the evening. They could play with their boyfriends all they wanted, because they were a waste of air.

It was a slap in Jessica's face, because she never backed down from anything. She talked her three cohorts and their boyfriends into showing up at 7 o'clock. At 1 o'clock in the morning, the four girls regretted it. Each couple had to have sex with their own boyfriend for 15 minutes. When the bell rang, the boys would switch to the next girl, and then the next. If the boy could not get an erection, that girl had to assist him orally in getting an erection, so he could continue, until the next bell. The games started shortly after 7 P.M. and they were scheduled to end 4 AM. There would be three 45-minute breaks for rest and for food, except for Jessica, who was the only one who accepted the third bet, and lost. 

When the first round was over, Jessica took a shower, and returned. While her three friends rested, she had to take on the four boys at one time. She like the other three girls was an anal virgin. When this night was over, only one lucky girl was left with that hole unpenetrated. The evening of ribald sex continued until after 1 PM, when your father told them they could leave.

On the way back to Charleston, we sent the boys back on a Boeing aircraft, and the four girls, Dycke, and I came home in the Gulfstream. That's when the girls found out their lives belong to me forever. We showed them the tape of them having sex, with multiple partners, smiling, laughing, and having a wonderful time. 

Their parents were pillars of the community. We threatened to put the tapes on the Internet, send a copy to their churches, to the colleges, and sororities they wanted to join, and any company where they applied for a position. They cried all the way home. Your father told them to be at his house at 8 PM the following Thursday in a dress with no bra or panties on, because their punishment would continue. The girls were scared to death. 

Nothing happened to them when they got to his house, physically, but mentally they were beaten to a pulp. Your dad told them what the next four years of their lives were going to be like, and if they screwed up, they would be sold to brothels in Belgium, the Netherlands, and Germany.

12 of our best agents were going to get them into real shape: mind, body, and soul. We started with their minds and had them shave their heads bald. The tresses they spent hundreds of dollars a month of their fathers money was given to a cancer hospital to make wigs for the women and children that needed it. We trained their bodies by sending them to boot camp for 10 weeks each summer, on a military base, in the Louisiana backwoods. We went after their souls by sending them to Saint Bonaventure University, a Catholic University in upstate New York. They didn't have to go to church if they weren't Catholic, but it had the strictest moral, dress, and honor code in the nation, including the military academies. 

Their grades had to be within the top five percent of the University, or their agents would step down hard on them to find out why, and correct it immediately. We sent magazines showing these places of horror to their agents, and they would show the pictures to the girls just before exams. It was an excellent inducement to study harder. They studied hard baby; they studied very hard. They finished their college careers third, fifth, eighth, and ninth in their graduating class. 

Your dad and I went to their commencement exercises and congratulated each of them on their success. With their parents standing beside them, your father offered each of them a position in one of our companies. One works in Germany, one works in France, one works in New York, and one works in Charleston. They are all very valued and highly paid employees. Yes all the tapes, including the master copies were destroyed."

Zoie's mouth was wide open, and her eyes were about to pop out of her head.

"What Zoie; what is your problem?"

"How can you call me a bitch after that story?"

"It's very easy to call you a bitch. I was a goody two shoes all my life. I never said a bad thing about anyone, or to anyone. I singled out these 4 bitches, because they picked on me relentlessly throughout 14 years of my life. When they turned 16, they went out of their way to make my life more miserable than it was before. After the success of my operation, and my face was returned to the way it should have been since birth, they wanted to become my best friends. I was now the prettiest girl in school. The boys wanted me more than they wanted them. They wanted to be where the Queen was. So I decided to do to them what they did to me all my life, but in the end, I made them better people for it. You can ask any of them where they would be now if that night hadn't occurred. I guarantee you none of them would say, I am the Executive Vice President of this, or that. I am the budget director of this or that. That night was a lesson for them. I got what I wanted out of it, and those four women received a future because of your father."

"I guess a little sex goes a long way."

"No baby, a lot of very hard studying goes a long way. Any moron can have sex."

"How high did you graduate in your class mom?"

"I was valedictorian of my class."

"No shit!"

"Zoie watch your mouth."

"Should I bother to ask about dad?"

"Your dad graduated six months early with every honor the school system had to offer. When I tell you he smarter than I am, he is smarter than almost anyone else in any room is."

"Even Doctor Luck?"

"You are talking about two geniuses in their own fields. I wouldn't bet against either of them."

"Mom when we get home I want to see a picture of you before you had your face operated on. You said that Gordon used the same words daddy said to you when he saw you naked in his parents room. He didn't care what you looked like; he cared about you. I see how he loves you today. I want to see how he loved you when you were 17. Please don't say no, because it's important to me."

"It's going to be very painful for me to show you any of those pictures. I only have a few left, because I tore the rest of them up. I don't want your pity. I want you to understand why I did those things to those four girls. Remember, when I got up in the morning every day that face was staring back at me."

"I promise."

"Okay, I'll show them to you when your father is not at home."

"Shall we play with your airplane now? We are here, and if Gordon is right, any six-year-old can fly an airplane."

"Missy, he's not here to protect you, so be good."

"You have no sense of humor."

"If I spank you, how would your sense of humor be right now?"

"It would be crying all over your aircraft."

"Keep thinking about that, maybe I'll let you wash it."

*********************

As she talked to the lead mechanic about the engines, he just shook his head.

"Look, Mrs. Schneider, I'll take your money if you want me to, but 700 hours after an overhaul is like a bird flitting from branch to branch. Did you feel any vibration or anything while you were flying?"

"No, she's a beautiful bird, and a joy to ride in. However, I promised my friends I would have the engines looked at. So please take my money, run the engines up, and let's see what happens."

"Okay, why don't you taxi it to the run-up area, and I'll take my boys over there, under your wings by truck. We will listen for anything unusual. I'll be plugged in to your radio port. Tell the tower we are there, okay."

"No problem, give me 10 minutes. Zoie come on, we are going for a ride."

"If it's only for a ride can I drive? I have that license."

"Zoie, please, this aircraft cost $73 million. Don't make me run you over with it. I would get blood all over the tires."

"Is that all you care about, the tires?"

"Some blood might get on the brakes too, but it would wear off quickly."

"So is your sense of humor."

"Close the door Zoie; you do remember how to do that, don't you?"

"Yes mother, I remember how. Do you want me to hook up the slide?"

"No, that will not be necessary. Come up here and sit down."

"Read this to me Zoie."

"Austin Tower this is 866 Poppa Sierra. Request permission to taxi from the ramp to the run-up area, over."

"Good, now can you do that with a headset on and pushing a button?"

"Sure, what's the difference?"

"Stage fright."

"Mother, when have you ever known my mouth not to work?"

"That's exactly what I'm worried about."

"Push the button and start."

"Austin Tower this is 866 Poppa Sierra request permission to taxi from the ramp to the run-up area over. You see mom it was as easy as pie. You didn't have to worry. It's just like talking on the telephone. I don't know why you are making such a big deal over this stuff."

"Zoie did you take your finger off the button?"

"Oh shit, sorry about that."

"866 Poppa Sierra is cleared from the ramp to the run-up area. We don't have any pie up here, but if you happen to have any, we would appreciate it."

"What kind would you like tower? I'll kick my daughter out of the aircraft, and have her go get some for you."

"How old is she?"

"She is 17 going on 2."

"I have three at home just like her."

"You didn't tell me what kind of pie you would like?"

"You buy it, we will eat it."

"It'll be coming your way shortly. It will be a delivery from the Schneider's."

"Thank you much."

"Zoie call your dad and tell him to have the hotel send one of every pie and cake they have at the hotel to the Austin Tower, and to do it now. I want it delivered in under 45 minutes."

"You are a very tough lady mommy."

"Air traffic controllers remember goodwill gestures, and so do pilots."

"Starting number 2." The number two engine came online smoothly, and all the numbers on the 'Glass Cockpit' screens read nominal.

"Starting number 1." The number one engine came online smoothly, and all the numbers on those screens read nominal too.

"Austin Tower 866 Poppa Sierra is on the move. I have two trucks coming with me, one under each wing."

"866 Poppa Sierra, Roger."

After settling in on the run up area, Payne said, "Zoie fasten your seatbelt, it's going to get rough in here in a little bit."

The mechanics opened the bottom shells of both engines, and shined high intensity lights inside looking for any abnormalities. They saw none, and there were no leaking fluids. Leaving the shells open, they backed away to either side, and the lead mechanic signaled from the nose of the aircraft to accelerate the number 1 engine to maximum.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



"We're going to start to shake Zoie, hang on."

Smoothly, Payne moved the throttle control forward until it reached the stops. The engine was roaring, and the aircraft was shaking mightily.

Over the radio, the lead mechanic said, "Reduce engine speed to 40 percent for two minutes, and then rapidly increased to maximum." 

Payne followed his instructions, and when the time was right, she pushed the control to maximum instantly. The engine responded like a thoroughbred. They let the engine run at full speed for 5 minutes. Payne was told to shut it down, and restart it. Everything went by the numbers, and Payne set the engine to idle.

They went through the same procedure with engine number 2 and everything was as smooth as silk. After running the engines for five minutes at full speed, the mechanic signaled Payne to shut the engine down and re-start it. As the engine was winding down, he said to her, "I can't see or hear anything wrong with those engines. They seem perfect to me."

Payne replied, "Every indication in front of me looked perfect also. At least I can tell my friends I did what I promised to do and they will feel better. Okay, I'm starting number 2."

'''''''BBBAAAAANNNNGGGGGG'''''

Every indicator for her number two engine died, and so did the engine. She looked out the right side window, and saw a mechanic lying on the ground. She shut down both engines, and called the tower.

Austin Tower 866 Poppa Sierra, we have an emergency situation. We need medical attention over."

"Poppa Sierra help is on the way."

"Zoie open the door."

Payne got out of her seat, ran to the back of the aircraft, and grabbed the medical kit. She said to Zoie, "I won't bother telling you to stay in the aircraft, because you won't. You stay close to me."

Zoie didn't answer her she just followed her mother.

Two mechanics were leaning over the injured man, when Payne got there.

"Do you know what's wrong with him?"

"Yes, he got his bell rung. When your compressor surged and the flame came out the back, he jumped back, lost his balance, and fell. He hit his head, and he got his bell rung. He is a little woozy now, but unfortunately, Susie's did not get rid of him. They are going to have to take him to the hospital for an MRI to check his thick skull, but he'll be fine. Neither God nor the devil want him yet."

"Would you please not talk about me like I'm dead?"

"You reacted like you've never seen a compressor stall before."

"We were finished with the testing. I didn't expect that to happen."

"Neither did I, but I didn't shit in my pants when it did. Excuse the language ma'am."

"It's all right, my daughter is teaching it to me."

"Way to go mom, your sense of humor is coming back."

"Two more months and I get rid of her."

"Really, where she going?"

Zoie and Payne pointed straight up.

"You are one of them?"

"Yes I am. I am marrying my boyfriend in December, and we leave December 25 on a really long honeymoon."

"Little lady let me shake your hand; first on your marriage, and second on being brave enough to go out there. I don't know if I have it in me to go."

"I don't know if we have a final number yet, but there are between 60 and 70 of us going, and we can't wait. They took the spacecraft on a shakedown cruise around the United States. It took a little bit more than 90 minutes. Spacecraft 2 is in the design phase, and it is more than 1000 feet in diameter, and five stories tall. It will be ready to fly in approximately 10 years."

"I can't get my mind around something that big flying."

Payne said, "Here's something bigger for you to think about. It's three engineers are 5, 7, and 10-year-old boys."

"I hope this ambulance has room for two. What you told me has my head spinning."

"This next 10 years are going to see a major change in the way we travel, build, and communicate with each other. Don't be surprised if it changes the way we handle money either."

"How's he looking doc?"

"The usual, ugly as hell. Unfortunately, he's going to live, but he's going to the hospital. He has to have his head examined to make sure he has a brain."

"Your hysterical doc, really hilarious."

"I want all his bills sent to me. I don't want one penny to come out of his pocket. If he has to go on unpaid leave, or Workmen's Compensation, where he's not paid in full, I want to know about that also so I can pay him, okay."

"That's very generous of you Mrs. Schneider, it's not necessary though."

"It is for my own well-being, I don't want anything to happen to him. Now what happened to my airplane?"

"It sounded like Axi-symmetric Compressor Surge. If it was, I can get you a new compressor by tomorrow morning from Dallas. You will be able to fly out of here by tomorrow afternoon."

"Save the part and give it to me. If it was replaced during the overhaul, someone has some explaining to do."

"Someone would have a lot of explaining to do with only 700 hours on it."

******************

"Teddy was right again dad."

"What did our redheaded terror predict this time?"

"Zoie went over to say goodbye to me, Delicious, and the kids. She said she was leaving today, and would see us in December."

Teddy said, "Zoie not go home today. She go home tomorrow. Engine go to sleep." 

"Payne just called me. She had a compressor stall in the number two engine, while they were testing it. It has to be replaced."

"Gray, you and my daughter created one wonderful child. You have nothing to worry about, when she takes over for me. It doesn't matter if she's five or 50, she will be a true, and wonderful leader."

"Don't leave us too soon Even. I don't want to take orders from a two-year-old."

"I'll give it my best Gray."

"I'll take it Even."

******************

134. Re-Searching 

October ended in a flurry of activity. All the medical equipment was installed properly, and tested by Doctor Finch. There were enough medical supplies, of every type, from vaccinations for newborn children, to pneumonia vaccines. There was a huge supply of birth control pills, and condoms. The operating theater was state-of-the-art. It even had robotic systems that Doctor Finch trained on in the hospital, so he would be familiar with it. 

They had 100 suits for EVA activities, in various sizes, ranging from very small, and a few in extra, extra large, so everyone could get out of the spacecraft and stretch their legs on a planet with a hostile environment. They had 10 tethered EVA suits, specifically for repairs, while the spacecraft was moving through space. Estimates for takeoff weight were thrown out the window, because it was going to be at least triple the initial estimate. Even when I spoke with Delicious, and Gordon, and they would tell me not to worry about the weight factor, I couldn't help but worry. Gordon would go over to a white board and do the math for me. He showed me that at six times initial gross weight estimates we could lift-off and reach escape speed within eight minutes.

Then I made a mistake. I said, "Will we be able to get off the ground?"

You don't say that with the inventor sitting right beside you.

Delicious screamed, "DAD."

She stood up, walked behind me, and hit me as her mother does. 

My brain rattled in its bony cage, and when it came to a rest, she was standing next to Gordon at the whiteboard, ready to explain to me how much energy she would need to get us off the ground. I felt like a first grade student when they finished with me.

******************

Not one inch of space in the cargo, and engineering areas was wasted. It seemed to Stephano that everything he ordered a year ago was now obsolete. The 3-D printers he ordered were obsolete. They were sending him the new ones at the same price, but they were slightly larger. The problem was they had already allotted a specific amount of space for them, and now other items would have to be shifted around to accommodate them. This was an every day occurrence, and his pencils were beginning to look like the craters of the Moon. His secretaries knocked on his door, and waited for a reply before they walked into his office. Otherwise, they risked the possibility of being speared by a flying pencil, like those that were sticking out of the walls, and ceiling in his office. He transformed from the mild-mannered Clark Kent, when he walked in in the morning, to 'TAZ', the Tasmanian devil, before 11 o'clock.

When things were really going bad, his secretary would call Patti, beg her to come to the building, and help calm him as only she could. 

Another problem popped up, when Doctor Finch went to ask Stephano for some help. When Joe left, Stephano had an evil look on his face. It was time to get even, with Doctor Even Luck for asking the impossible, and he made it possible. He called William, and explained the situation to him. 

William said the same name Stephano had in mind, and they both started laughing as they thought about scaring Even to death just before lift-off.

William said, "Call her to see if she still interested in going. If she is, send her the approval letter, and ask her not to show up before the 25th of December. We don't want him to bump into her accidentally and ruin the surprise. Do not show her name on the computer roster or the manifest, until after he signs it on the 24th. We will sneak her onto the stage in her flight suit, while he is talking. If he doesn't have a heart attack, we will know he is healthy enough to go."

"This is really cruel William, but I love it. I'll call her now. I hope she is still interested in going."

"Tell her what I said, that may be the inducement she needs."

"Maybe she should have a syringe in her hand?"

"Absolutely, with a very long needle."

*******************

After a joyous 20-day vacation, aboard the Queen Elizabeth II, the Ames returned home. The Mercedes was in the driveway, and they expected a warm welcome from Sandra, and their grandchildren. What they found was an empty house and a letter on the dining room table.

"This is to inform you that we will never see you again. As parents go, you are the worst that ever lived. You did not win the trip on the Queen Elizabeth. Joseph set it up so we could go to Temple and be with him for a few days. He went through all that expense to see his children and me. That's how much he misses, and loves us.

The word love is an anathema to both of you. I nearly had to die in a car accident, before either of you showed any concern for my well-being. You never showed any love or concern for my children. You used them against me to divorce the only man I ever loved. You threatened to give all your money to Monica, even after she tried to kill my babies many years ago. I couldn't let that happen again. It was the only reason I left Joseph, and returned home. I couldn't let my girls die at her hands.

Joseph is leaving this planet, on December 25, on Spaceship 1. I will never see him again. The girls voted not to go with him, and I have to stay with them. Joseph understands that obligation. He has given me enough money to live on comfortably for many years to come. I will go to work as soon as the girls go to college. Joseph asked me to look for another man to love, and make my life complete. I will try, but I will never find anyone as caring and wonderful as he is. 

I left your envelope with the $10,000 in it. It was the first generous thing you did in the 18 months we lived here. The $200 a month you gave me to live on to buy clothes for the girls, gasoline, and recreation, didn't go very far. Now you can save the $200. If you live long enough, maybe you can recoup your losses from the lawsuit against you.

We will probably wind up in the Midwest, where life is slow, and easy. I want the girls to be able to unwind from the terrible existence they lived here in your home.

I wish you had seen the way they acted with their father. They were totally different children. They were exuberant, lively, and filled with love, hope, and energy. Here they had to walk around on eggshells and not make a sound for fear of your wrath. 

I want my children happy, again. I will do everything in my power to make their dreams come true. You two deserve each other in this big house. When I am down stairs at my computer, helping the people at the agency's in town, there is never a sound upstairs. It is as if no one is at home. It is as if this place is a mortuary. You two never talk to one another, unless it is absolutely necessary. If you say 100 words a week to one another, it would amaze me.

There is much more I could say, but the venom in my heart would fill any Encyclopedia many times over. I ask you one thing, do not try to find us, and to please, leave us in peace. Maybe Monica will be a better fit for you, and your money then we were. Sandra"

When her mother finished reading the letter she screamed, "That ungrateful bitch. We gave her everything she could possibly want, or need, and she tells us this garbage. She's right; I never want to see her again."

Her father was more circumspect. His daughter pointed out many of their failings as parents, but he never realized them at the time. Sometimes you have hear the facts, from someone you love, before you realize that you have committed a crime so heinous, for so many years, it seemed natural to you. You lived your life the way you thought was correct, and suddenly, you find out, in the worst possible way, it was terribly wrong. 

He decided to do something to correct those errors in his judgment. However, he was smart enough to agree with his wife as she continued to rant and rave about their terrible daughter."

Maude Ames went to bed at her usual 9 o'clock hour. She took her sleeping pills, and was unconscious 20 minutes later.

Harold went online to find a hospital in Temple Texas. He was not surprised to find that it was named after William and Jemma Zabo. He called the main number.

"Good evening, this is Harold Ames, is Doctor Joseph Finch on duty tonight?"

"Yes sir he is."

"May I speak to him please?"

"One moment please."

"This is Doctor Finch."

"Joseph, please don't hang up on me. This is Harold Ames, and I need a few moments of your time."

"You're not worth a few minutes of my time Harold. You broke up my family for no reason."

"Yes I know. I would like to try to make amends for it if you'll let me. I can't make up for the last 18 months you, Sandy, and the children suffered because of my stupidity. If you listen to what I have to say I would appreciate it."

"Go ahead Harold, you have the floor."

"Sandra left us a letter that opened my eyes in a way that I never saw before. I never looked at life through anyone else's eyes but Maude's, and my own. We were always extremely rich, and it never occurred to me that we were as cold as Sandy put down in her letter. Thinking about the way the children acted in this house made me realize she was correct. They never acted as children normally do. They acted like tiny adults, and never made a sound. They rarely came upstairs to see us, or raid the refrigerator, as normal children do. They were always polite and proper, when they saw us, but our interaction with them was always the same as theirs was to us, polite and proper. We never allowed them to run around and play in the house, or outside on our property, for fear they would disturb the look of our estate grounds. I realize now how stupid we were as parents, and grandparents.

I don't know where Sandy is now. From what she wrote in her letter to us, neither do you. She said you gave her enough money to live comfortably for a while. I don't know how much that is, but from the bottom of my heart, I appreciate your doing that for my daughter. I'd like to send you $200 million to get to her, in any way possible.

In my Will, I will leave my entire estate to her and the children. Monica will get nothing. This was Sandy's greatest fear, the safety and health of Rebecca and Deborah. If you will tell me how to get the money to you, it will be there in one week. Do your best to forward it to her. You don't have to tell her it was from me, because I don't want her to send back. I want the three of them to live comfortably forever. 

Thank you for hearing me out Joseph, as you said I am not worth the few moments you gave me."

"It's very generous of you Harold, but I have no idea where she is. We didn't say goodbye to one another, because we would have cried for a week. Send the money to this account, and if she doesn't get it, it will go to a friend of mine who I told her to contact if she ever got into trouble. He is here in Temple, and he will advise me that she did not receive it, and he will return it to you."

"Thank you very much Joseph. I hope you have a safe and wonderful trip."

"Thank you Harold, I know I will."

Joe knew Sandra would get the money, because the account number he gave Harold Ames was the same as the $10 million he gave her. The bank would inform her of the additional funds that were deposited, and more than likely, she would reach out to thank him for it.

*****************

Everyone involved with the fitting out of Spacecraft 1 was working 12-hour shifts. The Arboretum was in, as well as the sprinkler system, and the enclosure. Tons of seeds were vacuum-sealed prior to being brought on site, to prevent little four-legged creatures following them on-board. Frozen/dehydrated meals by the hundreds of thousands were stored in temporary freezers in the hangar. They would be brought on board the evening of the 24th, through the morning of December 25th, and placed in an area designed by Gray.

Initially, Dycke said, "We can't possibly do this, it's impossible."

Gray responded, "Okay, I'll have Newton do it for you."

Dycke couldn't let that happen, he couldn't let a young boy show him and his team of engineers up.

"No, we will figure something out. I don't like you Gray, and I'm liking you less every minute."

"Don't get upset Dycke. Let Newton do it, it will only take him 10 or 15 minutes, and it will take all that stress off of you."

"I'm going to ask Even if he really needs you. If he doesn't, you're going into that freezer when I've designed it."

"You're going to do it yourself Dycke? Remember we have the wedding in the middle of December, and we are supposed to take off on December 25. Aren't you a little old to be doing this stuff by yourself?"

I grabbed Dycke before he killed my son.

"Are you two having fun this morning?"

"Let me go Even and you will see blood all over his computer."

"You mean my mild mannered son, Doctor Grayson Thyme, has gotten the better of the best jokester I have ever known? I must call Payne immediately, and tell her. She told me, more than once, it was impossible to do."

"He Went after My Pride Even. No one does that to me."

"What do you need to do, ask Teddy to fix one of your problems? She's very good at it you know."

"Don't you start with me Even; I can make this a two-for-one sale."

"You wouldn't do that Dycke. You have worked too hard on this project to see it fail now. There's the additional problem of Zoie being around for the rest of your very long life. If you hurt me or Gray just think of the consequences."

"I've decided I don't like either of you. However, since your taking Zoie off my hands permanently, I'll forgive you and get this job done."

"I don't know why you keep saying Zoie is a terrible child. She has been a magnificent guest in our home since the day she arrived. She helps Jennifer around the house every day. She watches the boys so she can get out, and do a little shopping on her own. She's a great cook, and a wonderfully educated young woman. I think you've done a marvelous job with her."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



"I'm going back to Charleston, before I throw up. For 16-years, she was the bane of my existence. We put her on birth control pills, at your insistence, and like a desert rose she blooms into a wonderful flower. After all these wonderful changes happen, she's leaving with you, and we will never see her again. Tell me life is fair, and I will call you a liar."

"How did you learn to run Dycke? How did you become the fastest runner in all of South Carolina? It wasn't because you wanted to be. People were bullying you because of your lack of size. You had to run to protect yourself. As they ran faster, you had to run faster still. A coach saw you running, and took you to over to the track coach. He made you the best runner in the state. All of a sudden, you became a celebrity on your own campus. Every jock protected you and the bullying stopped. It's not the way you planned it, it just worked out that way."

"I'm leaving; you two are a pain in my ass. Not only do I get a problem that's unsolvable, I get a lesson in life at the same time. I'm sure I don't like either of you."

"Yes you do, and on December 26, you will look up into the sky and wonder where your daughter is."

"I won't have time to look up; I'll be working on Spacecraft 2, and taking orders from Holden. Can you imagine me taking orders from a six-year-old?"

"It might be a good idea to look for an area in South Carolina, about two miles square, so he can put his 1025 feet in diameter swimming pool, and all the outbuildings he will need in one place. It will shorten the supply chain, especially from Wilcox, when they have to deliver the new Fusion engines."

"Yes, I can see where they would be thrilled with that possibility. If we bought land in New Mexico, and they had to deliver those new fusion engines there, it would be a nightmare."

"Is it safe to let you go now?"

"Yes I'm fine. All your son wants me to do is make a port to bring in outside temperatures to the freezer area inside the ship, without compromising any structures. To do that I have to make an opening in the outside shell. Then, I have to pass it through 505,000 gallons of water, and work my way through some of the 22 million bearings, which will be spinning at over 1000 miles an hour. That is 17 revolutions per second, to you stargazers. I have to break thru and interior wall, and find a way to mate it with your deluxe freezers, designed by your son-in-law, to keep your food frozen. 

If that wasn't bad enough, he says if it's too much trouble for me to do it, he will let Newton to do it for me. It will only take him 10 to 15 minutes. It's the reason I wanted to kill him."

"What he said is definitely not true Dycke." 

"Do you see Gray, your father agrees with me."

"You're correct Dycke. I agree with you completely. It would never take Newton that long."

I took off running for my office, with Dycke at my heels screaming for my head. I was very happy it was only a short distance, because regardless of what Zoie said, her father was still very fast.

As I turned into my office area, I yelled to my agents, "Stop him."

They did, and when they picked him up off the floor, he was extremely unhappy.

When he calmed down, again, we sat down in my office and discussed the new fiber. He said it was going to be a magnificent addition to our portfolio of patented products.

As he was leaving, he turned his head and said, "You are a prick and a half Even."

"Jennifer promised never to tell anybody about it. Do you want to see how long it is? I haven't strapped to my knee."

"You lying bastard, no one is that long."

"With the exception of Payne, think of something you never wanted to part with, and I will prove you wrong. Zoie told me never to bet against you, because you never lost a bet. Think of something I have that you want, and I will bet it against you. You have until 12 o'clock tomorrow afternoon to make a decision. The only thing you can't do is ask Jennifer again."

"You are lying Even."

"If you are that sure, make the bet now."

"I want to think about it a little while, I don't like the way you're talking about this."

"Dycke, a few seconds ago you said, 'No one is that big.' You are never wrong, are you doubting your instincts?"

"No, I'm just trying to think about how big a liar you are, as opposed to how big a dick you have."

"Have a wonderful day Dycke, and think of my knee often."

"Go fuck yourself Even."

"I can."

Dycke threw his hands in the air, and left. I have never seen him so frustrated, since I have known him."

***********************

The fifth level of our craft was divided in half. One side was devoted to exercise, and no one was excused from doing it. Every day members of the expedition crew would exercise for a minimum of 30 minutes during one period of the day, and 30 minutes during another period, until everyone went into stasis.

The other half of the fifth level contained 60 stasis units. These would be assigned at random, because no one on this trip was considered unimportant. 40 more stasis units were placed at the back of the auditorium area. 

If you are wondering why everything was bumped up to 100 units instead of 70 units, Doctor Finch reminded us that we were hoping for growth in our little band of travelers. Even at 100 units, considering the longevity we were looking at, sooner or later they may not be enough. We would work on that problem at a later date.

The only difference between any of the stasis units was the red button a few feet in front of Gordon's and mine. When I woke up from my deep sleep I had to hit this button to start the second hull spinning to create gravity for everyone inside the third hull, otherwise, everyone would go floating around. That would not be fun, because none of us had not been trained for that eventuality.

If I didn't wake up, Gordon was next in line to do it. He would not fail, because he knew this was essential for the well-being of the crew, and the ship itself. He would get Doctor Finch to me as soon as possible."

The flight crew would wake up first, because we had work to do. Everyone's stasis unit was on a timer, but the flight crew was scheduled to wake up 30 minutes sooner. We would clean up, put on uniforms, eat, and assume our posts to ascertain our position in the universe. If our exascale computers had worked correctly for the amount of years we had been asleep, they would tell us exactly where we were. It had been program to use star information gathered from Hubble, the European Southern Observatory, and the new James Webb Observatory when it came online. Using these three powerful Space telescopes and the star charts loaded into their memory banks, we could triangulate our position to within 100,000 miles. When that was done, our work became easy. We would know if we were in open space, or if we had entered a new galaxy. We would see where the closest planet was, and what type it is supposed to be. We will fly to it, test it, and send the information back to earth. It could take a century to get there, but it would get there."

For 50 years, everyone thought that Jupiter's moon "Europa" held the best possibility of containing some type of life form underneath the solid layer of ice at its surface. Now we know better. Because it transits through Io's orbit, whatever atmosphere it may have had was destroyed by the battle between atomic, and hydrogen atoms as they interact at two crossing points. The single water plume seen on Europa that made scientists so excited was caused by a meteorite strike, and not by a natural process going on underneath Europa's surface. It confirmed that Europa and Io were dead moons, because of their interaction. 

However, after being confronted by this devastating news, good news followed. 

Saturn's moon 'Enceladus' was found to have a large ocean of salty water, along with carbon dioxide and other elements needed to produce life. The Cassini satellite flew as low as 1800 meters above the moon's surface. It was hit by the salty spray, which helps form the 'E' formation of Saturn's rings. There were enough ingredients in that salty soup that some form of biological growth is possible in that briny ocean. Scientist started smiling again.

***************

As we go looking for a planet to explore, regardless of what is said about it on the earth charts, mistakes could have been made. A class M planet like Earth could be a class G planet. It could have too much nitrogen in its atmosphere for humans to live on safely. The only way to find out is to get close enough to the planet, and test the atmosphere for ourselves. This is the sort of thing we could do for as long as we live. That's why we are leaving the earth behind, and flying billions, no trillions of miles to see new things, and possibly say hello to someone else. Wouldn't that be wild?

***************************

135. A Dress Rehearsal

Adam walked in the door at 11:30 PM to find Laura putting dinner on the table. She had an apron on, yes only an apron. His eyes were fixated on her lovely rear end, and he groaned.

"Laura please put some clothes on, you're killing me."

She walked over to him, and gave him a hungry kiss.

"Hello Adam, I thought you liked my new freedom."

"I do. I love every bit of it. I would like to eat every bit of you. Since I can't for two more months, would you please rewrap my present?"

"Men, you can never make up your minds. You want to see a woman's body, and then you want her to cover up. You have no self-control at all."

"I sleep in the same bed as you do. We're both naked as jaybird's. I don't touch anything I'm not allowed to touch, and you say I have no self-control? If I were Catholic, they would anoint me a saint."

"You're not Catholic?"

"No I'm not Catholic."

"I can't marry you, my mother would kill me."

"Your mother would have an awful long way to travel to kill you. We are getting married by a priest just before we are getting on board the spacecraft. What more does she want."

"She's going to want our children to be raised Catholic."

"That's fine with me."

"I wonder if we are taking a priest with us."

"I hope they are taking a Rabbi."

"Why, are you Jewish?"

"No I'm Lutheran. I was just thinking about all the circumcisions for the boys."

"It's a good thought; whoever did you did a great job."

"I didn't have much of a choice in the matter. I looked down, and that's the way it was."

"Do you want to shower before dinner, or after dinner?"

"If we shower before I eat, dinner will be ice cold."

"I like the way we shower together."

"So do I. There are so many more things I could do to you in a shower, but I have to hold back because I love you, and I abide by your wishes. Let's eat, before I start nuzzling at your breasts."

"As I recall, that's on the no touch list."

"As I recall, that's on the no fair list also."

"Dinner, now.

"Yes dear."

Adam sat down at the table and began eating.

Laura took off the apron, went to the refrigerator, took out a chilled glass, and a bottle of his favorite beer. She walked up behind him and stretched out both arms to put the glass on one side, and the beer on the other. 

It did something else that made Adam choke on the piece of steak he was chewing on.

Laura's breasts encompassed his ears. She pulled back slowly to let the friction last as long as possible. She walked around the table, sat down, and began eating her salad, as if nothing happened. She looked as innocent as a baby lamb.

Adam was still choking.

"Drink something Adam; it will help it go down easier."

"Baby, after what you did to me, it might never go down."

"Me, what did I do? I just gave you a glass and a bottle of beer."

"You also nearly caused me a heart attack."

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm sure if I shoved my dick up your ass I wouldn't know what you're talking about either."

"That was a very unkind thing to say Adam."

"I would have had sex with you, and you would remain a virgin, technically."

"Wouldn't that hurt?"

"While I am at work go online and read up on it. With the proper preparation, every type of sex is fun."

"May I fuck you up the ass?"

"If it turns you on, yes you may."

"Can I do it to you first?"

"Yes."

"Where would I buy one of those things?" 

"One of those things is called a dildo. You go to any local sex shop, and they have them on the wall or on display somewhere in the store. You can pick one out by size, shape, length, color, texture, or your favorite porn star."

"You seem to be an expert on these matters."

"I have been in stores like that before to buy gag gifts for a friend's birthday, or for a bridal shower for a woman I know. I am not a babe in the woods, I've seen my share of pornographic movies, but I have never paid for sex."

"I should hope not, that would be disgusting."

"There is nothing disgusting about it, unless you are some lowlife picking up a trick on some corner. Many high-powered executives use exclusive services that can cost $5000 or more for an hour of a woman's time. They use these services, because they are very discreet. Do you remember the story about the Beverly Hills Madam?"

"No it must've been before my time."

"When the police handed over her client book to the district attorney, he would not release any of the names. It had so many senators, congressmen, local, and state politicians, Hollywood elites, high-powered bankers, lawyers, foreign dignitaries, and other extremely important people, the ripple effect would have caused the stock market to dive 1000 points or more. 

Would it surprise you to know that some of these women are very happily married, but they find themselves in the same positions as the men they service? They are young and beautiful, but their husbands are very successful, and goal oriented. They travel for weeks at a time leaving their wives alone. They join these services, and either work on a schedule, or on call, if a client wants a particular type of woman."

"You have to be making this up Adam. No married woman would do that to their husband."

"I love you so much Laura, but you are so naïve. It is so prevalent in this country, and around the Western world, they made a movie out of it."

"Are you finished eating?"

"Not really, why do you ask?"

"I need a shower, now."

"Never let it be said I didn't want you to be clean."

"Wipe the steak sauce off your mouth please, it's very distracting."

"I can't see it, why don't you wipe it off?"

"How is your neck Adam?"

"Don't touch my neck; I can finally turn it from side to side. I will wipe my mouth, and you can check it to make sure it's clean."

Adam turned, took Laura's apron from the countertop, cleaned his mouth thoroughly, and started running towards the bedroom.

Laura screamed as she chased him. "I'm going to kill you. My apron was clean. Now I'm going to have to wash it, and I'll have nothing to wear around the house."

She turned into the bedroom, where Adam was getting out of his clothes. He stopped, "Oh Lord, I forgot about that. I wanted her dressed and now she will be naked. I thought I won, but I lost instead."

"Adam, you tried for weeks to get me out of my clothes and you finally did it. I'm comfortable in my own skin now, don't make me regret it."

He walked over to her, with one pant leg still on, and the other trailing behind him. He put his arms around her, all in the safe zones, and kissed her.

"Laura never be ashamed of your body, because it is perfect in every way. I am in awe of you. From the tips of your toes, to your pubic curls, to your beautiful hair. There is no one who can compare to you. Your bedtime stories give me the will to go on. When I think I've given all I have to give, and I'm ready to quit, I don't, because I will not lose you. I go to work the next day, and attack the problems I am having with renewed purpose, because of you.

I look at you as you are now, and I wonder how anyone like me had the courage to take you by the hand, and pull you out of the spacecraft to go to lunch. It was the best decision I have ever made in my life."

"Dammit Adam, I need a shower, now. I'm burning up."

"Good, now you know how I feel when I walk in the door, and you are naked."

"I wasn't naked; I had a clean apron on. I'm going to the shower, with or without you."

"I submit, let's go."

He picked her up, and with his pant leg still dragging behind him, carried her to the main bathroom, put her down, and went to turn the water on. He nearly killed himself, because Laura stepped on the pant leg, believing the other one would come off. It didn't, and he fell, headfirst, into his new shower.

She stood there innocently looking down at him.

"You should be more careful when you're walking around like this."

"Yes I will. Next time, I'll make sure you are in another room. It seems my life is in danger when you're around."

He removed his slacks, turned on the water, and pulled her in to the shower, while the water was still cold.

She didn't scream, she's said, "I knew you would do something to get even with me."

"I did nothing of the sort Laura. You said you were burning up. I put you under cold water to cool you down."

"Water is not going to do it Adam. You want more, and as it turns out, I need more. You can touch me from hairline to hairline, but please don't make me kill you by traveling inside. That remains for December 26, and not one day before."

"I think it's time for me to wash your hair. Sit down."

"I thought you would..."

"Laura, sit down. You have given me the present I have wanted for a long time. I will open it properly."

"Bastard. I need you, and you're going to make me wait."

"I needed you, and you made me wait. Put your head back so I can wet your hair."

He wet her hair thoroughly, and put the wand back in its holder. He made the water a hotter, and positioned the water so it would hit just above her center. The hot water would cascade down through the valley of her thighs, between her labia, over her clitoris, and into or around her vagina, if he was lucky. It would excite her beyond measure.

Before she could think he did it purposely, he poured a large amount of shampoo onto her hair and began rubbing it in gently. He began telling her what beautiful hair she had.

After five minutes of talking to her, he asked, "Would you like me to use my nails against your scalp?"

When he didn't get an answer, he smiled. He knew she was in trouble, because the hot water was doing its job.

He continued washing her hair down to the very tips. He moved his hands to her shoulders and arms, and then slipped them under her breasts for the first time. She moaned.

He moved his face near hers, and she turned to kiss him. She was on fire, and the right spark would set off an explosion.

His mouth stayed on hers, his left hand stayed, played underneath her breasts, while his right hand moved down her body, and played to the top of her pubic curls. Her muscles did not contract when he reached that barrier. She was totally lost in the moment, and it was time to give her the release she needed so desperately.

He squeezed both breasts gently, and then began running circles around them. His kisses moved to her neck, jaw, and throat, and then back to her luscious lips. He moved to her side, knelt down, put his mouth over the nipple of her right breast, and began to suckle.

Laura's senses could not take any more. She screamed, and totally shut down.

After a few moments, she felt a cold compress against her head, and heard Adam calling her name.

"Wake up Laura, naptime is over. Come on Princess, drink some of this, and it will help you open your eyes."

She opened her eyes, and looked at him. He was holding a cold glass of water.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



"Were you going to dump that on me if I didn't wake up?"

"Would I have a straw in the glass if I was going to do that to you?"

"After what you just did to me, I would believe anything of you. Is it always that way?"

"Hell no, that was just the preamble. We have not gotten to the good stuff yet."

"Now I know why my mother makes so much noise when she's in bed with my father. That was amazing."

"You have it wrong baby that wasn't amazing, I am amazing."

"You're not at all conceited are you?"

"I have references if you want."

"No thank you, I believe I can live without those kinds of references."

"There is no need for you to be jealous Laura. None of them comes close enough to be compared to you."

"I'm not jealous. After what just happened, I feel like I'm late for the party. I have to talk to my sister. I'll call her in the morning."

"I do not want you to change your mind about December. As far as I am concerned, December 26 is a day set in stone. It is only 7 ½ weeks away. We can make it Laura; we can both make it. If it's orgasms you need to relieve your stress, and tension, I'll give you 1 or 10 of them every night. I will not have sex with you until after we married."

"Now isn't this a turnaround Adam. You've been wanting to get into my panties, since the moment you first saw me. Now you won't do it, because I'm weakening. What's going on here Adam?"

"If you break your promise to yourself, you may hate yourself for weakening to temptation for the rest of your life. I you do, you will hate me also. I don't ever want that to come between us.

I am busting my hump to be with you, and you are busting yours to be with me. We can do this baby; we can do this together."

"Would you mind getting the soap out of my hair, it's dripping into my eyes."

"I think we are going to need conditioner. The soap has been in there for 20 minutes."

"20 minutes, was I out that long?" 

"No you weren't. We played for a long time, before you went unconscious."

"I enjoy taking showers with you, they are always an adventure."

"I enjoy taking showers with you too, especially this one."

"This one's not over yet is it?"

"That is totally up to you Laura. Suddenly, I have lost my appetite for food."

"What does that mean?"

"If you really want to know, after I put the conditioner in your hair, I have to touch you below the other hairline. The choice is yours."

"Where is Anna when I need her?"

"You're a big girl Laura. You're old enough to make your own decisions."

"Okay."

"Okay you're going to make your own decisions, or okay I can touch you below the second hairline?"

"Am I going to hate myself in the morning?"

"Didn't I just tell you that we are not going to have sex until December 26?"

"I trust you Adam. I love you more than I believed I would ever love a man. You can touch me anywhere you want, and I will still love you as much as I do now."

"Sweetheart, when I get finished with you, you are going to love me a whole lot more."

******************

They landed at le Bourget airport in Paris, and the first thing Zoie said to her mother was, "This place smells funny."

"Zoie this is Paris, you can't walk 100 feet without being at the entrance of another restaurant. Every one of them uses onions, shallots, and mushrooms in nearly every dish they make. You better get used to it; because that's the food you're going to be eating for the next two weeks, or more."

"Do they have a Wendy's, or a Jack-in-the-Box?"

"We just got here Zoie, don't make me smack you."

"You have no sense of humor mom, none at all."

"I wonder if they sell paddles in Paris?"

"There is a glimmer of hope for you mom. That was almost funny."

"I wasn't looking for funny; I was looking to redden your ass more than it already is."

"Did you have to spank me once, every time you put that gel on it?"

"It was just my way of telling you I was finished."

"There are many easier ways of telling a person they are finished, mother."

"I liked my way better than any of the other options, unless of course you wanted me to use my paddle."

"No, that would have been mean. I think Gordon took off three layers of skin, with his paddle, yesterday."

"No he didn't. He was very kind to you. Your cheeks were only pink, and there is no trace of red anywhere. I have been red, so red I could not put panties on for days. The benefit happened when your father came home at night. We've been married for nearly 27 years, and that man continues to do things to me in bed that our new and exciting. I swear, by now, he must have read every book on sex, from South Carolina to Oxford."

"Dad is so busy, where does he find the time mom?"

"When it comes to me, your father always finds the time. That's how much he loves me."

"After you showed me the pictures of what you looked like before your operation, I would never doubt that dad loves you very much. How he looked at you the day of his party, and the first words out of his mouth were, "My God you are beautiful," told you he was a keeper then and there."

"I couldn't believe he said those words to me either. I thought he was crazy. I asked him if he was blind, and he said no. I said are you sure, and he said yes. I asked him if he had seen my face, and he said yes again. Once we got past that, it was all over. He walked over to me, covered me with my towel, and for both of us we shared our first kiss."

"I think the most important part for both of you was, at that moment, neither of you had two nickels to rub together. It wasn't until afterwards dad came into all that money."

"If we start talking about what happened to your father and I in the four months before our wedding, we will never get anything done in Paris. If you want to continue this conversation when we get home, we can do that, but we can't do it here, because we have work to do."

"Okay, when do we start?"

"We will start tonight, with your last meal."

"You just told me about all the restaurants here in Paris. Why would this be my last meal?"

"I have been through this before Zoie. Just trust me on this, or you will live to regret it."

"Why do I have a feeling I am not going to like getting my dress here?"

"You are going to love your dress. The way Suzette goes about it is a little different then anyone else in the world. You will wind up loving her on your wedding day, but probably not before."

"Mom you worrying me."

"There's nothing to worry about baby. She is a magician when it comes to gowns."

"Can I get spaghetti and meatballs?"

Payne put her fingers about half an inch apart. "Zoie, you are this close to a spanking."

"Mother, you have no sense of humor. I am going to have to help you with that, while we are here."

"Don't do it while you are getting you fitted for your gown. You will be naked most of the time, and I will have straight pins handy, thousands of straight pins."

"Do you enjoy the paddle mom?"

"I enjoy it, because of what your father does to me afterwards. I never realized how much I missed it, until I became pregnant with your oldest brother. Your father refused to hit me with the paddle, even though I begged him to do it. He made love to me, and satisfied me in every way possible, but something was missing. 

After your brother was born, and the Doctor gave the okay for us to have sex again, the first thing I did was hand your father his paddle. He asked me if I was sure. I told him I missed it desperately. The first time he hit me, I had an earth shattering orgasm. I did not feel the next nine strikes on my ass, because my mind was somewhere else. What I did feel was your father enter me from behind, and his hands rubbing lotion all over my backside."

****************

As they finally cleared customs, their limousine was waiting for them. With their entourage of agents on both sides, they moved swiftly into the armored vehicle.

"Do you ever get tired of having all these people around you every day and every night mom?"

"No, they are here to protect me, and you. Europe is not the safest place for us to be, because of our wealth. You will never go anywhere without me, and our agents. This is not a request; this is in order. There are so many different organizations here that would like nothing more than to kidnap you, or me for ransom. Your father would pay it immediately, and we would be dead as soon as they received their money. That's a story for another day."

"They tried to get you already mom?"

"Yes, but as I said that is a story for another day."

"You can't do that to me mom. It's just too exciting story."

"I can do that to you, and as I said, it is a story for another day. I'll let your father tell you about it, when we get home."

"In Teddy's words, 'NOT FAIR."

"In mommy's words, too bad."

***************

The next morning at 11 o'clock, Payne and Zoie walked down the same street, to the same storefront Payne had almost 28 years before. Her agents did not like the look of this dowdy place, but she only allowed one female agent to go in with her.

"You have to be kidding me mom. This is the place where you had your dress made."

"Don't judge a book by its cover, Zoie."

An elderly man, with a cloth tape measure around his neck came to the counter and asked how could he help them.

Payne swore he was the same man who greeted her all those years ago.

"Hello, I am Payne Temple Schneider; I am here to get a wedding dress for my daughter Zoie."

"Yes, madam has been expecting you. Would you come with me please?"

"Go ahead Zoie, I'll follow you."

As soon as Zoie passed the second curtain, and entered the main salon she said, "Holy Shit, this place is stunning."

She walked into the main salon, which was a near perfect circular mirrored room, about 60 feet in diameter. It had a raised runway, fitting platforms, heavily tufted chairs and couches, plus tables. The lighting was adjustable, and dramatic. Zoie stood there in awe.

"I told you not to judge a book by its cover."

"Why do they have such a lousy entrance?"

"It's basically to keep people they do not wish to serve away. It was the same way when I came here. Your father owns 51 percent of this company."

"You are a wealth of knowledge mom. You could have told me that before we left home."

"Why would I have ruined the surprise for you?"

"You wouldn't ruin the surprise for me, because you are a pain in my ass."

"I am sure there is a sporting goods store in Paris, and when I find it, I'm going to buy a paddle. You will have fond memories of this place before you leave."

"I would, if Gordon was swinging the paddle, and not you."

A woman was brought out in a wheelchair and Payne recognized her immediately. She ran to her, fell to her knees, and hugged her.

"I am so happy to see you again Suzette. The dress you made for me still makes the cover of magazines after all these years."

"You are still a lovely child Payne. For you to show this kind of respect for me, and the work I did for you years ago, means more to me than money."

"What happened that you are in a wheelchair? It can't be age, because you are still as beautiful as you were the day I first saw you."

"I wish the bus driver would have realized it at the time. My driver was stopped at a traffic light, and the bus hit us from behind. They said his brakes failed. He was doing 60 kph, and even though I had my restraining belt on, I broke something in my lower back, and I can no longer walk."

"Oh Suzette, I am so sorry. Are they absolutely sure, nothing can be done for you? I can get you the best in the world to give you a second or third opinion."

"If you could do that for me, I will make your daughter a dress as beautiful as yours."

"I will be on the phone while you're working on her, but you have to promise me one thing."

"What's that Payne?"

"Her dress can be as beautiful as mine, but not more so. She will hold it over my head, until she leaves in December."

"The daughter is supposed to look prettier than the mother Payne. You are not supposed to be jealous of her."

"Can I be jealous of her just this one time?"

"No you can't, and in your heart you know it."

"You don't know what a bitch she was growing up."

"You have no idea what a bitch is. Chantal, get out here."

A woman in her late forties walked out from the back room, dressed in black as all the other seamstresses were when she was here last time.

"Chantal, I'd like you to meet Mrs. Payne Schneider, and her daughter Zoie."

Chantal did a little curtsy, and said how do you do.

"Payne, I'd like you to meet my bitch. This is my daughter, and if I tell you every story about her, and the trouble she has caused me since the day of her birth, we would be here for the next 40 years. Isn't that right Chantal?"

"Yes mother."

"Chantal is 48 years old, and for the first eight years of her life she was a pleasure. I don't know what happened after that, but she never said a kind word to me afterwards. Her father left me when she was five, and I never knew where he went. I divorced him when she was six, so that could not have been it. Her life went downhill afterwards. She began stealing, smoking, and using drugs. I sent it to psychologists, psychiatrists, rehab centers, and even to places where they put you under hypnosis to try and help her. Nothing worked for her. She stole a car and she got caught. The judge looked at her record, and sent her to jail for one year. That didn't work on her either. So if you want to talk about a bitch, this one is mine, and I never gave up on her. She works here full-time now, and she is one of the best seamstresses I have. I have no idea what turned her around, or what took her so long to do it, but I thank God she did."

Zoie asked if she could ask Chantal a question.

Suzette said, "Go right ahead."

"Chantal, how old were you when you turned around your life?"

"I was 36 years old."

"What type birth control device were using?"

"I was using an anti-spermicide foam, and a diaphragm."

"You change to birth control pills, when you are 36. Am I correct?"

"Yes, how did you know?"

"Fucking doctor's, I caused my parents grief for 16 years because of a chemical imbalance in my blood. They put me on birth control pills, and I became a normal human being. You lost 30 years of your life for the same reason. You caused your mother all that grief because they didn't find that same imbalance, and they should be sued for it. A fucking birth control pill saved my life, and it straightened out yours. Mom you have to do something about it, look at how many people you could save from all this grief."

"Zoie, two people don't make a case for out of control children being saved by birth control pills."

"Would it hurt to put them on a 90 day trial to see if it helps the children return to normal?"

"No, I suppose it wouldn't."

"When you put me on birth control pills, how long did it take before I changed?"

"I noticed the change within three weeks."

"Miss Suzette, when did you notice the change in Chantal?"

"Chantal wasn't living with me at the time. She called me one night and started apologizing for everything she ever did to me. It was like the flood gates to her soul opened. 

I begged her to come home, and she did. She has no restrictions, and she leads her own life. I have an aid that helps me, and the three of us come to work in the morning. As you said Zoie, Chantal has become a wonderful human being."

"I feel terrible for you Chantal, 30 years of your life wasted, because doctors couldn't find an imbalance in your blood. They get rich while we suffer."

"That's not a fair statement Zoie. They may not know what to look for, and if the labs don't know what to test you for, everyone is as blind as a bat."

"Mom throw some money at them, and they will find an answer. The government is cutting back on basic research, and every parent with a child who is out of control is suffering because of it."

"When did you become so smart Zoie?"

"When I became a normal, rational human being, I began reading the newspapers, and magazines that came into the Luck household. I became up-to-date with current events, because I had to keep up with a five-year-old boy who is much smarter than I am."

"That five-year-old boy is smarter than 95 percent of the population of the world. So I wouldn't sweat it if I were you."

"I think we are talking too much, and working too little. Ladies!"

"Have fun Zoie. The games are about to begin."

"What's going to happen mom?"

"You will find out in a moment."

"I'm beginning not to like you."

"I didn't like you for 16 years, and I didn't throw you over the balcony."

"If you had, we wouldn't be here today."

Chantal grabbed Zoie's hand, and pulled her onto one of the fitting life stands.

11 ladies, all dressed in black, as Chantal was, stood in front of Suzette awaiting instructions.

"Strip her to the skin, and measure her to the millimeter for a bridal gown. Prepare every silk and satin material we have, in the brightest white on the white fabric. Everything we have must be the best, and if it's not in stock, order it."

Payne took out her cell phone and prepared to take pictures of her daughter, as the women removed her clothes like army ants moving through a meadow. The pictures she took of Zoey's face were priceless.

Zoie screamed. "Mom, stop them there taking my clothes off."

"Mom that old man is here."

"Of course he is dear."

"Mom, I'm naked and he's touching me."

"I know, how else is he supposed to measure you?"

"You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?" 

"Of course they are dear."

"I have no idea what you're talking about dear."

Zoie saw the flash of the camera.

"Mom, please tell me you're not taking pictures of me."

"I'm not taking pictures of you."

"You're lying to me aren't you?"

"Yes I am."

"Then why did you tell me you're not taking pictures of me?"

"Because you asked me to say it."

"Mom he has his hands right there."

"I'm sorry dear, where does he have his hands?"

"If he moves his finger a silly little millimeter higher, he's going to tickle my fancy."

"If that's what you want dear, ask him to do it. I'm sure he's done it before."

"Mother, you are terrible."

"Isn't that wonderful of me?"

"You may think it is for now, but when I wrap my hands around your throat, you may want to think about it again."

In perfect French, Payne asked the elderly gentleman, who was measuring her daughters' inseam to move his finger slightly higher.

Suzette said, "Payne you are mean. If he's going to do it, he should at least satisfy her."

"My dear friend, I don't want her satisfied, I want her horny as hell."

"You are a terrible girl Payne, but a wonderful mother."

"Henri proceed."

Henri raised his finger, placing it on the outside of Zoie's labia, and he wiggled it.

Zoie's eyes sprung open. She screamed, "Mom, he's right there, he's tickling my fancy. He's not supposed to be there."

"How else is he supposed to get accurate measurements dear?"

"In case you've forgotten, I'm wearing a dress, not slacks."

"The slacks are a going away present from your father and me."

Suzette said, "We don't make slacks."

Zoie screamed, "Mother you lied to me."

"No I didn't. He's taking your measurements so I can drop them off at a store that makes custom slacks. They usually make them for men only, and I did not believe you wanted to get measured there."

"I'm sorry I doubted you mom."

"You are forgiven."

Suzette whispered, "Your daughter has beautiful eyes. I could see all the way to the back of her head when he touched her."

"He is only the second man to touch her there. She's marrying the first one."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 28



"Like mother like daughter, is that what you're saying?"

"Even to the words he said when he first saw her. Dycke and I knew we were in trouble from that moment on."

"He must be a very formidable young man to go up against your husband."

"He didn't do a thing, Zoey did. We were all congregating around a sick friends bed. The two of them walked in, and announced they were engaged. His side of the family roared with approval. Dycke and I were speechless. This one walks over to her father, bat's her eyelashes at him, and asks if he will walk her down the aisle.

Dycke folded like a deck of cards, and said yes. She walks over to me and tells me she will be leaving with Gordon on the spaceship, and I will be rid of her forever. How could I possibly say no?

Now that she has changed. I would break every bone in her body to make her stay, but I can't do that to her."

"It's one of the joys and heartbreaks of parenthood. Is the boy good for her?"

"The birth control pills may have turned her life around, but it was Gordon who put the smile on her face. He is a wonderful young man and a great scientist. He is the inventor of the Fusion Nuclear Reactor. Anything nuclear built from this time forward will be built from his design. He did that when he was 15 years old, and the things he has done since then would curl your hair."

"Where is she going that you will never see her again?"

"She is leaving December 25 on Spaceship 1. When they leave, they are never be coming back. It is a mission of discovery and science. Everything they see and do will be transmitted back to earth."

"When I read about it in the newspaper, it was always a little article. I thought it was a joke. Now you're telling me it's for real."

"Dycke and I have $25 billion invested it, and our companies have done more than half of the research and build-out of the exterior vessel. It is a marvelous machine. Our government doesn't want to see it succeed. They are idiots, because they think such a radical design, and thinking can't work."

"They are going to feel very foolish as a Christmas present."

"Look at her, isn't she beautiful?"

"She had no choice, look at her mother."

"Where is lunch, I want to see her drool."

"Oh, I stopped doing that many years ago."

"Why has everything I hoped for gone to seed? It was going to be the highlight of my day."

"His Lordship wants a gentler, kinder approach done to your daughter."

"How long ago did you get that message from his Lordship?"

"I received it yesterday."

"When I get home, I am going to kill that rat bastard of mine. My husband had him do it."

"Ladies, join me please."

Another group of 10 ladies dressed in black joined Suzette.

"The mother of the bride need a new gown. Make sure she doesn't try to leave before she is properly fitted, and I pick out her color."

"I don't need a gown. I have many gowns I can wear for her wedding. Suzette don't do this to me. This is my husbands doing again, isn't it. He's dead, I'm going to drop him out of my airplane, and kill him."

Zoie laughed. "It's not all that bad mom. You can even see where dad has the cameras located. I hope you are groomed properly, otherwise everyone will laugh at you."

"Zoie keep your mouth shut. I am so pissed off at your father right now; I may drop you out of the aircraft, on our way home, just to practice."

"I don't know why mom, you've been on film once before."

"Yes, but that was 27 years, and three children ago."

"Mom, you are still gonna look hot."

"If you going to make fun of me, try using the English language."

"I thought I did, where did I go wrong?"

"It was probably when you opened your mouth."

"Ha-ha very funny mother. Your sense of humor may be returning."

As Payne stepped onto the dressing platform Zoie said, "My God, you are beautiful."

"Zoie stop that. I am a middle-aged woman with three children. I am not beautiful any longer."

Suzette asked if she would like to lose some money over that statement.

"Suzette you are very kind, but those days are over for me. I am still good-looking, but beautiful is long gone."

"You will go to bed at 9 o'clock tonight and be here at the salon at 9 o'clock tomorrow morning. Eat a light breakfast with very little liquid, and I will prove you wrong."

"Anything you say Madam."

The fitting, color, and fabric selection took another three hours, and when it was over Zoie, and Payne were exhausted.

Payne asked, "Do you want food or bed first?"

"Can we have food in our room so I can nibble, and we can eat later?"

"Sure, that works for me."

"I wonder if dad had that fitting sequence sent to live to his office?"

"Why, so we could laugh at my antics?"

"No, so you can have him arrested on child pornography charges. I'm still under 18."

"What a wonderful thought. I'll call Steve tonight and ask him."

"You will not ask uncle Steve that question. He will want a copy of the evidence first, which will conveniently join his collection."

"Steve does not have a pornography collection. Cynthia would kill him."

"Then I must' have been babysitting at the wrong house."

"Cynthia will kill him. Where did you find them?"

"In his home office, among other inconspicuous items. I learned a lot about hiding things from uncle Steve. He is a master of it."

"He would have to be to keep something hidden from Cynthia. She is part bloodhound, and part Rottweiler."

"Did uncle Steve know about that part when he married her?"

"Your uncle Steve was blind, as most men are, when he asked her to marry him. It was so cute, and no I will not tell you about it."

"Mom, I'm getting tired of telling you this, but you are no fun at all."

"Those stories are only to be told by the people involved. If you want to know what happened, ask your uncle Steve or aunt Cynthia."

"Okay."

*****************

Zoie and Payne arrived at the salon the next morning at 9 AM. They were ushered through the extravagant mirrored room, and into an area, neither had seen before. It was where models went to prepare to show off new lines of dresses, and materials for the owners of who represent the company abroad.

Chantal was there representing her mother, who would be in at her usual 10 o'clock hour. She ordered the experts to assess the hair of the new arrivals. Hair artists were told to keep it with in her mother's boundaries, otherwise they would never receive a phone call from her again. It would be like putting them on a black list forever if they disobeyed. The makeup artists would come next, and they knew their jobs very well. It was the body artists that Payne might object to severely.

While they were being primped and prodded in the back, a world- renowned photographer was preparing her wares in the center of the mirrored room. She was here many times before, and she knew every nuance of the glass behind her subjects.

As Suzette was wheeled in, they kissed as old friends.

Raquel you will have no trouble with these two, because they are truly beautiful in their own right. The mother believes time has passed her by. We must prove to her that she is wrong.

Raquel laughed. "Will she believe I am almost 70?"

"I can't believe you are almost 70, how will she?"

After talking for a few moments, Suzette went into the back to see what was keeping them. As she thought, it was Payne.

"Payne stop that and lie down."

"Suzette they want to..."

"I know what they want to do, because I ordered them to do it. Now be quiet, spread your legs, and get this over with."

Zoie chuckled at her mother's discomfort, as the hair around her pubic area was either removed, and reshaped. She was so embarrassed her whole body turned red.

When she got up from the table, and their eyes met, Zoie's mirth disappeared. She took a few steps back to increase the distance between them. 

She was about to run further away, when Suzette said, "Your next Zoie, get on the table."

Zoie said, "I have almost nothing there. What are they going to cut?"

"Lie down and you will find out."

"Mom!"

"Don't look at me for help you traitor. You laughed while they were doing it to me."

Zoie was mortified, as they trimmed in between her thighs, between the cheeks of her ass, and the hair above her pubic bone. The soft bristled brush they used to clean her off went deep into her valley, touched her magic button. It caused her to squeal, and jump.

The technician laughed. "It happens all the time little girl."

Zoie replied, "It's the first time for me."

Suzette said, "Come on everyone, Raquel is waiting."

Payne replied, "We have to put our clothes on."

"You would only have to take them off in a second."

"You're taking nude pictures of us?"

"How else am I supposed to show you how beautiful you are?"

"I don't think I like this idea. Anyone could see these pictures."

"Would I let anyone see these pictures, except you, your husband, and Zoie?"

"No, I don't think you would."

"Come on mom, this sounds like fun."

"I can't believe I am doing this."

"Yes you can, because in your heart, you really want to know how other people see you."

"I hated you when you were a bitch. Now I hate you because you can see straight into my heart. When did you get so damn smart?"

"Didn't I answer that question for you already?"

"Do you want me to hate you until you leave this planet?"

"You are one of those people that are leaving on Spaceship 1?"

"Yes I am, if my mother lets me live that long."

"Can I get an invitation to do a photoshoot of the spacecraft, before it leaves, and during the lift-off?"

"Who should I tell Doctor Luck is asking?"

"I sorry, I am so use to people recognizing me; I forget to give my name sometimes. I am Raquel Welch."

"Hi, I am Zoie Schneider and this...where did she go?"

Suzette said, "Look down Zoie, she is on the floor."

"What is she doing down there?"

"She fainted when she recognized me Zoie. Most people think I am either dead or so old I am in a nursing home. As you can see, I am in neither place."

"Why, you don't look that old."

"I am almost 70 years old."

"Bullshit! I sorry, please excuse my language."

"It's refreshing to hear someone use that phrase about my age. Let's help your mother up, she has rested enough."

"Hi mom, did you sleep well?"

"Do you know who our photographer is?"

"Yes she does Payne. We have had a wonderful conversation, while you were lying on the carpet."

"I am so sorry. I saw your face, and recognized you instantly. You are still as beautiful as you were when I first met you at the Presidential Ball."

"Do you realize that was over 18 years ago? You were a baby then, and you are still a baby now. I am going to prove that to you through my cameras lenses. Get up we have work to do. I hope you don't mind working with men around. I have my crew with me, and most of them have seen more naked women than all American men put together."

"Mom, this is getting ridiculous."

"I thought you said this was going to be fun?"

"I hate being stabbed by my own words."

Over the next three hours, they had their hairdos redone, makeup repaired, and the sweat carefully removed from their bodies. The only thing they didn't do was change their wardrobe. They were naked the entire time.

Raquel did not take one indecent picture of them. Their breasts showed, and were prevalent in almost every picture. However, either their bodies or hands always covered their most intimate part.

When Raquel was finished taking pictures, she sat the two of them down, and had them look at the video recording that was taken, while she was photographing them. Every time there was a bright flash of light, she stopped the machine and showed them what the picture would look like in detail.

Payne and Zoie did not realize they were still sitting there naked. It felt like second nature to them now.

When they were finished, Zoie asked if she could borrow Raquel's cell phone. Then she started counting on her fingers.

Payne asked, "What are you trying to do?"

"I'm trying to figure out what time it is in Texas?"

"It's six hours earlier than here."

"Okay, I'll call dad at work."

Raquel said, "I thought she was calling Doctor Luck."

"She is. He is her second father now."

"Hi dad, did we discover anything new since I left?"

"Yes we did Zoie. Your room is a lot quieter, and Gordon spends a lot more time training than he did before you left. It's either frustration, or he misses you."

"I can't imagine which one it might be dad, because I miss him desperately. I have a favor to ask you."

"Go ahead darling, if it's within my power, it's yours."

"Mom and I just had some pictures taken, and the photographer wants to know if she could do a photoshoot of the inside of the spacecraft before we take off, and during liftoff."

"Zoie, we have never permitted anyone to photograph inside the spacecraft. There are too many proprietary items in there that others might use without our permission, or the permission of our government."

"I'm sure you could work something out with her about those items dad."

"Let me talk to the photographer, what is her name?"

"Dad sit on the floor. I don't want you to hurt yourself as my mom almost did."

"Zoie, I am not like Gray, or your mother. Tell me the name of the photographer."

"Dad, if you get hurt, your wonderful trio of nurses will be back on your case, until you take off. Do you want to go through that again?"

"No, that will never happen to me again. I am sitting on the floor. I swear on all my children, I am sitting on the floor."

"I'm taking you at your word dad. I don't want you to get hurt. The photographer's name is Raquel Welch."

Zoie could hear screaming in the background.

"Even, Even, talk to me. He still breathing. Pick up the phone and see who he was talking to."

"Who is this?"

"It's me, Zoie, he just fainted. He will be fine in a minute."

"How do you know he will be fine in a minute?"

"Because he reacted the same way my mother did."

"What did you tell him Zoie?"

"I told him the name of our photographer."

"He's coming around; don't cause him to have a heart attack please."

"I won't, I told him everything he needed to know."

I picked up the phone, and in my quietest voice said, "Zoie if you are lying to me, I'm going to kill Gordon."

"Would you like to speak to her dad?"

"No, not yet, I want to speak to your mother first."

"What do you want Even?"

"Your assurance that it's really her."

"I guarantee it. I met her once before, and she is as gorgeous as ever."

"Let me talk to her."

"Hello Doctor Luck, it is my pleasure to speak with you."

"Miss Welch, the pleasure is mine. We have never allowed anyone inside the spacecraft, because there are many things of a proprietary nature that nations could use, without our or our country's permission. If you would be willing to sign a very strict nondisclosure agreement for yourself, and allow the pictures you take to be vetted by us before publication, we will be able to work something out between us. As far as your being allowed to witness lift-off, it would be our pleasure to give you credentials to be there."

"I'm not sure I like the part about the pictures being seen and approved by you first, but I understand the secretive nature of your mission. I'll have my attorneys call your attorney in the morning. I would like to get these pictures published for the December issues of all the major magazines. It is going to put me on a very tight schedule."

"Why don't you fly here with your attorneys, so they can meet mine and hash out the agreement? You can begin taking your pictures, but we will maintain control over your cameras and film until the agreement is signed. Only you will be allowed into the spacecraft, and no one else. Can you live with that restriction?"

"We will be there Saturday morning, if that meets with your approval."

"Fly into Austin airport, and give us your aircraft number. Our agents will pick you up, and bring you here. You will get here much faster that way."

"Thank you Doctor Luck, I look forward to meeting you."

"I agree Ms. Welch; don't mind the stares of my agents when they see you. You were the last of the beautiful women to star on the movie screen. Everyone after you was a stick figure, and not a real woman."

"Thank you Doctor Luck that is the nicest complement I have had in years. Goodbye."

**********

"What the hell happened Even?"

"Zoie and Payne just had their pictures taken by Raquel Welch."

"That's nice, who is she?"

"In her day, she was one of the most beautiful women in the world. Now, she spends most of her time traveling the world taking the most beautiful pictures of animals, nature, and people, you will ever see. She has been published in every magazine from National Geographic to Woman's Wear Daily. I just gave her permission to photograph the inside of Spacecraft 1."

"Dad, which head were you thinking with when you did it? You never let anyone photograph the inside of the ship."

"I was thinking with the big head Gordon. We will have control of her cameras and film, until the NDA is signed. We will go over her pictures to make sure no proprietary items have been photographed. She didn't like that part, but it was a take it, or leave it proposition. She took it. We will put her in a flight suit, because they have no pockets to hide anything. If she tries to hide anything, between her breasts, I will happily go in there and find it."

"What will mom say about that dad?"

"I will tell her I couldn't allow anyone else to do it. I let her into the spacecraft, and it was my duty to reach in between her breasts, and pull the offending item out. I may not get it the first time, but by the 50th time, I should have it."

"Do you really believe mom is going to let you get away with that dad?"

"No, but I will have had the pleasure of feeling Raquel Welch's breast, before your mother beats the crap out of me."

"How old is she?"

"In my mind, she is still the woman wearing the animal skin bra, and mini-skirt. However, now she has to be in her sixties."

"She may have changed since then dad."

"I guarantee you she has, but only for the better."

"Would you like to bet our household maximum on that?"

"I've never seen you in such a hurry to lose your money."

"Zoie's not here, I have no one to spend my money on."

"I thought you were sending her roses every day."

"Oh shit, I'm in trouble. I'll be right back."

Gordon knew nothing about flowers, but he hoped Mister Valentino could help him send Zoie something more than just roses. When he reached his outer office, his secretaries yelled, "Stop, you cannot go in there."

"I have to speak to him; it's a matter of life and death."

"I guarantee you if you open that door you are going to be dead. Sit down and wait until that door opens, or go back to work and we will call you when he is available."

"Is he going to be long?"

"It all depends on his stamina."

"What does that mean?"

"Sit down and wait, or go back to work, and we will call you when he's available."

"That's not what I asked you."

"I have given you my answer."

A short time later, Stephano's door opened, and Patti was still two feet off the ground, being held in his arms.

"Thank you for coming dear, it is always a wonderful interlude in the middle of a lousy day."

"I always cum when you're fucking me Steph. Today was extraordinary. You must have been extremely tense, and I must ask whoever did this to you, to do it more often. My stallion was in rare form today, and I loved it."

Gordon was red from the bottom of his toes to the tip of his hair. He had never heard love talk like this before. It was very exciting all the way to his soul. He got up quietly, and tried to sneak out the office unseen.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 29



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 29



Using his arms like the tines on a forklift, he connected with Barbara's thighs. She was lifted higher into the air, did a 540-degree turn, and landed on her stomach, facing her starting point. She cried out in pain as she landed.

Monty, Liz, and Cathy ran over to see if Barbara was okay.

Gordon said and did nothing. He went to the ice machine, filled up the bucket, and walked to where Barbara lay.

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, she's fine. She's a little woozy, but she will snap out of it in a moment."

"This will help her. ' Wakee-Wakee Barbara,' it's time to get up." He dumped the bucket, and ice on top of her head.

Monty got angry with him.

"What the hell is the matter with you?"

"All I did was exactly what she said she was going to do to me when she won the match. She knew my right knee was bothering me, so she constantly went after it. When I was down in a legal hold, she would punch my knee, which was illegal. Anything legal I didn't care about, but she would go out of her way to do anything she could that was illegal to hurt me. I decided I would put on a show for her and make her think she disabled my knee. Then she tried to do the same thing Liz did at the end of our match. "Say good night Gordon." That was the end of it for her. I wasn't going to hurt her; I was going to embarrass her. Now Cathy can go back to the compound and tell everyone how a one legged man beat the crap out of her."

"Gordon, Liz, and I noticed one thing; you get stronger the longer you go. If I hadn't hurt your knee earlier, I wonder what would have happened between you and Liz. I believe Liz would have beaten you, but I would have liked to see more fighting between you, rather than you playing defense most of the time.

Oh, one more thing, if you ever call me Tubby again, you will be playing the headless horseman every Thanksgiving."

"Monty, this is our last Thanksgiving."

"I'm very happy you got my message."

"I think I'll sneak a live turkey on board the ship."

"Are you planning on living dangerously?"

"I don't know. How many eggs do turkeys lay per season?"

"Gordon, not even you could get that by your father."

"It was just a thought."

***********************

140. As the World Turns

As he was lying in bed reading the Babcock and Wilcox manuals for the nuclear power plant, Reese knocked on his door.

"Yes."

"I was told to tell you there's a naked lady, in Paris, who wants to talk to you on Skype. The guys are checking her out for bugs now. She is on her seventh pirouette, and we keep finding more. We will let you know when she's bug free." 

"Okay, I'll wait here until you are done, or until she kills you all, which will likely come first."

Reese handed him the computer, and when he saw the screen. All he could do was laugh. There was her face surrounded by flowers, flowers of every color of the rainbow and Zoie was the prettiest flower of all.

"Are you in need of watering my dear?"

"No thank you, our room looks like the Amazon rainforest. It is so lovely, thank you Gordon."

"I would like to take credit for it, but Mrs. Valentino did all the work. I knew they traveled a lot so I went to ask Mister Valentino if he could recommend someone there to get you flowers. It turns out they own a chain of flower stores all over the world, and Mrs. Valentino just took charge of everything from that point on. I'll be sure to tell her that you love it."

"It's true Gordon. Noone has ever seen flowers like these before. They are magnificent."

"So tell me all about your tiring day in the City of Lights."

"Are you alone Gordon, because we have to talk."

"I'm in our room, and that sounds ominous. What's the matter Zoie?"

"You know how much I love you Gordon. You brought so much happiness into my life in such a short time. I can't believe it's happened to me."

"Zoie you have me very nervous. Just tell me what's on your mind. The easiest way to do it is to spit it out. Zoey spit it out."

"My mother wants me to stay here with her."

"What do you want to do Zoey?"

"I need you to tell me what to do Gordon, because I don't know what to do. I ruined my parents lives for 16 years. All of a sudden, I'm normal and during most of that time, I have been living with you. My mother and father never had a chance to see me this way, and she asked me to stay with her. Talk to me Gordon, please talk to me, and tell me what to do."

"It's like Abraham and the baby. You can't satisfy both parties by splitting the baby in half. What I will tell you is this; on December 25, I am leaving. I will take your love with me wherever I go. One day if I get the chance, I will name a planet or a star after you. Whatever decision you make, be sure you feel it's in your best interest long-term. Stay close to your parents Zoie, because either way, you are going to need their love and support."

"Why aren't you fighting for me?"

"Fighting for you, I would die for you Zoie. This is one of those things where nobody comes out winning. If you stay with your mother, she will feel terrible because you left me. You will feel terrible because you left me. And I will feel terrible because you left me. It works the same way if you come with me. It's logic my love, everyone loses either way."

"Gordon would you do me a favor and get angry with me"

"Would you give me one reason to get angry with you?"

"I made this call, isn't that reason enough."

"Zoie did you lie to me?"

"No."

"Zoie have you made your decision already?"

"I think so."

"You're staying with your mother."

"I think so."

"You see Zoey; you are such a beautiful person two people want 100 percent of you all the time. Only one of us can have you. Regardless of what your final decision is, I will always love you. You are my first everything. I will never be able to say that to anyone ever again. I love you Zoey. Goodbye." 

He signed off Skype, closed the laptop, and came to tell us what happened.

He knocked on our bedroom door and asked if he could come in for a moment. Naturally, we said yes.

Without preamble he said, "You can scratch Zoey from the departure list. She will not be coming with us. There will be no wedding in December. Zoie has decided to stay with her parents. She feels she screwed up 16 years of her parents lives, and during most of the time she has been 'normal,' she has been living here, with us.

I did not try to talk her out of it. I told her everybody loses in a fight like this. She said her decision is not final, but I'm sure it is. That's all I came to say, I'm going to finish my reading, then I'll turn in. Good night."

He turned, and walked out of our room closing the door behind him.

I looked at Jennifer, "What just happened?"

"If you're talking about the little boy who should be walking around with his heart broken, and tears in his eyes, but talked to us as if he was reading a grocery list, I'm not quite sure."

"Yesterday that same boy wanted to pound my skull into the dirt for not telling him that Monty was going with us. He had the same reaction when he saw Monty. I mean he was fighting mad. This evening, one of the worst things that could occur to a boy his age happens, and there is no reaction at all. You or me?"

"I think I'll talk to him Even. Logically he is correct, everyone loses, but it doesn't mean your feelings don't get hurt."

"You know my background in the art of love is you. If you said no, I'd still be a bachelor. So he's in safer hands with you, than he would be with me."

"Even when it comes to affairs of the heart, I would trust Holden, before I trust you."

"That hurts Jennifer that really hurts."

****************************

"Gordon, it's mom, may I come in?"

"Sure mom, come on in."

"Before I close the door, do I need the tool chest?"

"Why would you need the tool chest mom?"

"I want to know how hard it's going to be to get answers out of you."

"Mom if you ask me a question I'll answer it honestly, just as I always do."

"How do you feel Gordon?"

"Shitty, yeah really shitty."

"When you were in my room, you stated everything so matter-of-factly it was like it happened to someone else, not you. Is it just settling in now?"

"Let me put it this way. I now know why dad was very happy living all alone in Idaho Springs. If they take me off the flight Christmas Day, I'm going to find myself a place just like it."

"Gordon, you just turned 17. You can't legally drink for four more years. You can't go into the military for another year. Your life hasn't begun yet. Eight months ago, you didn't know Zoey existed."

"Don't go there mom, because you'll lose."

"What you mean?"

"From the moment you set eyes on dad in the airplane, to the moment you said I do, how long was it? If you subtract the four days he got lost in the woods it would've been that much shorter. So time really doesn't matter. The same thing happened with Delicious. The only reason she waited to marry Gray was she wanted to be 18. It was an artificial date that she set in her mind. Time is relative. It expands and contracts throughout the universe. Whether I knew Zoey for a minute or for a microsecond, I knew that I loved her, and she loved me.

Don't forget to tell dad that lady will be here for pictures on Saturday."

"I'm sure he'll remember. Goodnight my dearest son, regardless of how far you are away from me, I will always be this close to you, and I will always love you."

"I know mom, that's why I understand what Zoey is going through. It's a shitty situation all around."

***************

"That was quick, what did he say Jen?"

"Would you tell me when he turned into you please?"

"I've had 14 wonderful years to work on him if that's what you mean."

"He is totally compartmentalized. He puts his love and a feeling into one corner of his brain, and lives his life and another. Today he got hurt, he just locked it up, and it doesn't exist anymore. He feels shitty to quote him, but any other boy would be devastated. I hope he doesn't implode."

"I'll tell Monty in the morning to keep a close eye on him."

*******************

"You did what? When did you turn into your mother, Payne?

"Don't yell at me Dycke. I didn't tell her what to do. I asked her to stay. She made the decision, not me."

"Of course she decided to stay, because she was with you. If Gordon were standing beside her, she would have chosen to stay with him. I can't believe you did that to them. I have never been disappointed with you, since we met, but what you did to them yesterday really disappoints me. I'm going to call Even and see how everything is there. I hope Gordon is all right."

"Please, don't talk to Zoey about him until we get home. Talking to her face-to-face will be easier than talking to her over the phone."

"Payne, I am going to spank you harder than I ever have before, and believe me, you have earned it."

"I disagree with you. If that's the way you feel, I'll keep Zoie out of the house, while you do it."

"I love you Payne, nothing will ever change the feelings I have for you."

"I know."

******************

"Don't lie to me little shit, how do you feel?"

"I can see this is going to be a fun week."

"You have two choices Gordon. You can answer my question, and be at work on time, or you can get to work an hour late, with bruises all over your body."

"I choose option number two please."

"How did I know you were going to say that? Liz, your services are required."

Liz got out of the SUV dressed for battle.

"He wants to get his ass kicked at 7:30 in the morning."

"Who said you were going to kick my ass. I've learned your best move, and you told me how to defeat it. Monty hasn't beaten the shit out of me this time. I will give you a run for your money."

"The poor boy is delusional. I'm going to kick him in the head to bring him down to earth. Let's go Gordon times wasting."

They walked back into the house, and past the kitchen.

"I told you he would pick option number two Monty."

"Thanks for setting me up dad."

"Consider it therapy, my son. Your mother and I discussed it, and it was either keeping you from work, or getting your ass kicked. We chose option number two also."

Gordon kissed his mother. "I hope you are pregnant, when we leave."

"I'm sorry Gordon, he can't get me pregnant. He was fixed years ago."

"It was very unmanly of you dad, to keep that procedure a secret from mom."

"Keep your mouth shut Gordon."

"Even what did you do?"

"I didn't do a thing dear, not one thing."

"Dad, you told me years ago, that one lie leads to another, and then another. Soon you forget what the truth is. You tell mom what you did, or I will."

"I am going to cut your salary to ZERO dollars."

"Dad, I'm giving all my money to Richard and Holden. You'd only be hurting them."

"Don't make me get a knife, and cut your balls off."

"Don't do that, Doctor Finch reconnected him four months ago. He is no longer shooting blanks."

"Even Zachariah Luck, you are a dead man."

I grabbed Jen's arms, and kissed her with all the love in my heart. I said to my wife, my love, my partner in life, "I wanted to give you something as a going away present that would always remind you of me. I had Rod scour the world for something so precious, and so singular that no one else would ever have. He looked for art, diamonds, and yachts that would put everything else in the world to shame. However, someone else would come along, sooner or later, and try to top it.

Four months ago, I asked Doctor Finch if a reversal was possible. He said it's not only possible; today it's an ordinary procedure. Our hospital has all the newest technology, and only three people were there to assist him in the hour-long procedure. It wasn't like Rod's type procedure at all. I had no swelling or aftereffects. He said it would take about a month before everything was back in action. That was three months ago. You could be pregnant, and not know it yet."

"Monty would you take my husband downstairs, and kill him for me please."

"I can't Jennifer, he still signs my paychecks."

"Liz would you kill my son for me, because he kept this secret from me for so long."

"I can do that."

"Monty if I told you Gordon added 300,000 acres of land adjacent to yours as your birthday present, would you stop Liz from killing him?"

"You did what little turd? Those corporations wouldn't sell me an acre of land bordering mine. How did you get them to sell you 300,000 acres?"

"It was easy, and I got a cheap. Rod told them that small herds of buffalo in neighboring states had tested positive for Brucellosis. Now, small herds of cattle had to be euthanized, because they had tested positive for the disease. For the first time in 130 years, the disease had transferred from buffalo to inoculated cattle. If it transferred to major herds in those states, the Department of the Interior would order the cattle ranchers to kill, burn, and bury every animal on their property. The department would have to capture and test dear, mountain lions, and bears for the disease. If any large animal north of Colorado tested positive for the disease, every animal would have to be slaughtered as a preventative measure. The corporations couldn't sell the land to Rod fast enough."

"You lied to them?"

"I did not tell a lie, I did not speak to them. I paid for the land through Rod, but I most certainly did not tell a lie."

"You cheated them out of the land, but you didn't tell them a lie."

"That is correct. I told Rod what land I wanted, and I left the rest up to him."

"Liz take little turd downstairs, and beat the shit out of him."

"Why, it was a birthday present for you."

"My birthday was the same day as yours, and you didn't tell me. I didn't tell you I was approved to go on the spacecraft for three weeks, and you were pissed. Let's just say I'm getting even with you. Isn't that right Doctor Luck?"

"It's almost time for me to go to work. Your word has been law when it comes my son, since he's been three years old. I am not about to change that now. Monty, from his neck down he is yours. From his neck up, he is mine. Remember he has a good heart, and his mother loves him very much, as do I."

"Liz, keep that in mind."

"Gordon get changed, I'm getting bored."

"Dear, do you want me to pick up some pregnancy tests on my way home?"

"Do you really think I'm going to be able to wait that long? If you see a gun on the kitchen table, when you get home, turn around and run for your life."

"Remember dear, it is a mortal sin to kill someone, and it is unforgivable in the eyes of the Lord."

"In the immortal words of Rhett Butler, "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."

"Somehow dad, I think you are in trouble, more trouble than me."

"I hope the dam test turns blue, and she has quintuplets, because my guys have been resting for so long."

"Even get out of here before I kill you now, instead of later."

"You better call Doctor Finch, and find the best OB/GYN in Temple. I will probably have to change my Will before December 25."

Jennifer screamed, "If I am pregnant, you are not going anywhere. I am not going through another pregnancy alone. I did it with Gordon, and it was not fun. We are married, and you are going to be at my side, every step of the way. When 'The Good Luck 1' leaves, almost everyone I know, and love will be on it. The only people here with me will be Rod and Rosalyn. You fucked me my love, and I have just returned the favor."

I sat there and tried to read Jennifer's face. She was stone cold serious.

Holden and Richard ran down the hallway wondering why we were yelling.

In a frightened voice Richard asked, "What did you do wrong now dad?"

"Why is it always me? Why couldn't it be your mother for a change?"

"You just answered your own question. Mom doesn't make mistakes, only you do. What did you do wrong this time?"

"I got your mother pregnant."

"Did you get her permission to do it? It is supposed to be a joint parental decision."

"He's 10 years old, and he knows more about decision-making than you do."

"If you are unhappy with this pregnancy, we can terminate it honey."

Holden put his hands on his mother's belly and asked, "Mom if someone's in here, please keep him or her. Who knows how smart or pretty they could be. You always wanted a girl; this could be your chance."

Jennifer picked him up, and kissed him. "Your father knows I wouldn't terminate the babies. I will terminate him first. As far as it being a girl, I wouldn't bet on it. Your father only gives me boys."

I took three $100 bills out of my wallet, and put them under the pretzel jar.

"I bet at least some of them are girls," and ran out the front door.

I heard Gordon laughing. I heard Holden ask his mother if she was all right. I heard Monty tell Liz to get Jennifer a glass of orange juice. Going home tonight was going to be interesting. I decided to call my daughter and have her ask our redheaded clairvoyant what she thought about Jennifer's situation.

"Good morning baby, how are you?"

"Good morning dad, what did you do wrong now?"

"Who said I did anything wrong. I called to say hello to my daughter."

"Gray left for work 20 minutes ago, and you never call me at 7:50 A.M. just to say hello. So what did you do wrong that you needed to talk to me this early?"

"I think I got Jennifer pregnant."

"Weren't you fixed after Holden?"

"Yes, and it's a long story, but I got it reversed a few months ago."

"Dad have you thought about moving up the departure date, otherwise you may be dead before hand."

"I didn't pick December 25 as a departure date because it was Christmas. I picked it because the Earth's axis will be in perfect alignment for us to take off on a southeasterly heading of 138 degrees, with no course corrections. We will only be overland as we hover at 500 feet to check our systems. Once we say goodbye, we will only be overland for 11 seconds, as we passed South of Houston. When we reach the convergence zones, near the equator, we will have past through the exosphere, at a more than 25,000 miles per hour, and 107 miles above the earth. Unlike the space shuttle, when they announce, 'Max Q', we will never go through an area of 'Maximum Dynamic Pressure' because of the shape of our vehicle. What December 25, and a heading of 138 degrees does for us is it gives us time to gain speed, and altitude, so we do not get caught in the severe turbulence at high altitudes, near zero degrees latitude."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 29



"You are a sneaky bastard, as always, dad. I thought you picked Christmas Day as a publicity stunt. All along it was purely scientific."

"Don't I always has an ulterior moment Delicious? You should realize that by now. Is our tiny terror awake?"

"Yes, she is terrorizing Newton."

"Would you ask Teddy how many babies Jennifer is going to have; and if any of them are girls."

"Dad, you know that's cheating."

"I'm just hoping that Jennifer is going to have at least one girl in their, before I leave."

"Dad, if mom is pregnant, you are going to be in so much trouble."

"Baby, it's not 8 AM, and I've been told that by 3 other people already. I guess it must be true."

Delicious walked into the playroom, where Newton and Teddy were playing with Giant Lincoln Logs. She asked what they were making.

Newton answered, "We are making a stairway to a train station."

Teddy said, "No, stairs to ship. We fly soon."

"Yes we do Teddy. Are you excited?"

"No, much to do. Gordon okay. Zoie unhappy, mommy happy, daddy not sure. Zoey stay here. Not live long. Die in accident. Mommy very unhappy. Be in hospital many years. Never same. Daddy miserable long time, move out of house."

"Is there anything we can do to change that?"

"Zoey make bad decision. Everyone unhappy."

"Can I ask you a happy question?"

"Yes."

"Grandpa wants to know how many babies are in grandma's belly, and if they are girls. He really wants to give grandma a girl baby, before he leaves."

"No, no, no, not allowed tell."

"I know baby. I told grandpa the same thing. He will have to wait until the doctor's can tell him. I love you little one. You are very special to all of us."

"I know."

"You know I don't like it when you answer me that way."

"I know."

"I am going to lose this argument."

"I know."

"I'm going to cut your hair off."

"Climb out crib."

"I lose again."

"I know."

"I love you."

"I love my mommy."

"Gotcha!"

"I know."

"Dammit, I couldn't keep my mouth closed."

"I know."

"Teddy!"

Teddy didn't answer."

***************

"Dad, Teddy said she's not allowed to say, but what she did tell me was startling."

"What was it?"

"Zoey is not coming with us. She is going to die in automobile accident. Payne is going to be in a hospital for many years. She will never be the same. Zoie made a bad decision. Everyone is going to be unhappy. Eventually, Dycke will leave Payne."

"Like hell, I won't let that happen. I'll kidnap her first. I won't have everyone's lives be destroyed, because of a confused little girl, and a possessive mother. I'll call Dycke and tell him what's going on"

"Dad, if you're going to kidnap her, telling her father is not a good move."

"I'm not going to tell him I'm going to kidnap her, I'm just going to tell him what Teddy said. Maybe he'll come up with something."

********************

"Newton help, come me?"

"Sure Teddy, what are we doing?"

"Surprise for grandma. No tell mommy."

"Am I going to get into trouble?"

"Maybe, two banilla ice cream, choclate syrup you, no me."

"You have a deal."

They went into her room, and she pointed to the bottom drawer of her dresser, which she couldn't open herself. 

Newton opened it, and found all of her baby clothes inside.

"Teddy these clothes are too small for you."

"Put on floor, two by each. Pink dress top, close drawer, go play."

"I know what you're doing. You are going to drive mommy crazy."

"Mommy not crazy. Mommy bored, needs something important to do. Help you make sound move faster light. Is possible, work hard, not much time."

"I wouldn't know where to start Teddy."

"Sound move round mountain, ask grandpa where start."

"I've never had a headache. I think you are going to give me one."

"Nobel Prize, Newton Luck Thyme. Must go now, mommy catch us."

A little while later, Delicious walked into the playroom.

"Teddy, were you in your room?"

"Play with logs; almost finished."

"Newton, was she always with you?"

"We've been together every minute mom. Is anything wrong?"

"Yes, two stacks of her baby clothes are on the floor. I don't know how they got there."

"Were you getting ready to donate them to make more room for her new clothes and forgot about them?"

"It's a good idea, but I hadn't thought about it. They are right in front of the changing table. They couldn't have been there when she woke up this morning. Maybe your father was looking for something he hid, and didn't put them away."

"That sounds like something dad would do. At work, he doesn't stop until he is finished. At home, he never remembers where he leaves his glasses."

"That is your father. I'll ask him when he gets home."

"Should I give you his answer now, or do you want to wait until 6 o'clock."

"No, I'll live in suspense, until he gets home."

"You no fun mommy."

"You fun Teddy."

"I know."

***********************

In the basement, across the street, a battle was raging. Liz was giving Gordon everything she had, and Gordon would not go down for the count. As he told her before the battle began, Monty beat him up before their first bout, but today would be different. It was, and Monty was rooting for both sides. When Liz tried the kick that knocked him out the first time they fought, not only did he rotate into it, but he also gave her a forearm to the jaw as an added impetus for her not to try it again. 

Monty scored the 30-minute bout 50 to 39 in Liz's favor. 

Gordon was incensed.

"Do I have to bring Jeff in here to score a match properly? I beat the shit out of her most of the time. She got some better shots in than I did, but an 11 point difference is garbage, and you know it."

"She held several kicks back, because she didn't want to hurt you."

"Is that true Liz, you held back?"

"Yes I had to. On certain moves towards your kidneys and liver, I had to hold back, or you would've been in severe pain."

"Who do I have to fight that will not hold back?"

"I'll ask Jeff who in your weight class is the best he has."

"Good, set it up, and we will do it in the main building. We will let Jeff score it. Liz, I'd like to keep training against you, and I would like you not to hold back."

"I would like that also. You test me to my limits most of the time."

"I'm going to take a shower and go to work."

************************

Adam burst into the house a little earlier than usual. It was only 11:30 PM, and dinner wasn't ready. Laura looked at his face and new something was up. He was lit up like a Christmas tree from the inside, and if he didn't say something soon, he was going to burst.

"Say something Adam; say it before you have a heart attack."

"I am fully qualified. I passed the test. I got a 97, and they passed me."

"Adam no one gets fully qualified, unless they score 100 percent on the test. It's a hard and fast rule, and the committee won't let you get your rating without it. Did they tell you what you messed up on?"

"Yes they did."

"Well, what was it?"

"I spelled my name wrong. I only spelled it with one F. That's why they deducted three points from my total score. Since it didn't affect my academic or technical work, they passed me. They told me to look at my drivers license any time I signed anything."

"Adam, you are an asshole."

"Yes I am. However, I am a fully qualified asshole now. I can start working regular hours."

"I hope they can find at least one more plumber before we leave. Otherwise you are going to be working your ass off every day we are in space."

"Honey, I told you I'm used to hard work. Now that I know I'm going, and I'm going to be married to you, I couldn't be happier."

"Dinner is not ready. Do you want to take a shower?"

"I really think it's unfair that you are already prepared to take a shower, and I have to get undressed. Next time I'll undress in the car. Have I told you how gorgeous you look?"

"No, not since you left the house at 5:30 this morning."

"Start the shower, and I will remedy that fact 1000 times before we eat."

Laura sprinted towards the bathroom, which recently became her favorite room in the house.

Adam turned off the oven, to keep dinner from burning. He walked leisurely to the bedroom, undressing as he went along. He removed his boots, and put them in the closet. He stripped, and put his clothes into the hamper. She had trained him well.

He smiled thinking how far they'd come in such a short period of time. Not only did he love her physically, but also spiritually. 

For the first time in her 24 years, Laura was head over heels in love, and in lust with him. She was enjoying the freedom of her body, and understood all the sounds that came from her mother's room all those years.

Adam was shaken out of his reverie by an ear-piercing scream.

"Adam get in here, before I call for a replacement."

He stuck his head into the bathroom and asked, "Who could you get to replace me in your hour of need?"

Laura proceeded to list the names of her every agent that was on duty.

"I thought you loved me. Now you tell me you are just using me for my body."

"This decision is yours Adam, get in here, or I will go home to Glen Falls until December 24."

"You wouldn't do that to me; no, you wouldn't do that to us."

"I would miss you as I would miss my right leg. However, you promised me something, and now you are backing away from me. Why Adam, is it because you're fully qualified now and don't need me as a front anymore?"

Adam got into the shower, and knelt before her. 

"Laura, I need you like a drowning man needs air, like a dark room needs light, and a starving person needs food. 

I don't know why this argument between us started, because I was thinking about how wonderfully we have grown together in such a short period of time. I marveled at my depth of feeling for you. I realized how little feeling I felt for the women I had been with sexually. You mean so much more to me than any or all of them combined. There is nothing you could ask me that I would not do for you, simply because I love you so much. Please Laura; never leave me, because you may as well take my heart with you, if you do."

"Do you remember when I told you this is my first time around the block Adam, and I was afraid of being hurt? That's what it felt like when you wouldn't come to me. If this was my house, instead of yours, I feared you might leave, and never return. I didn't know what kept you, and I was very worried."

"If we were staying on this planet, I would put a closed circuit television system in so you could watch my every move. I told you the first day we were together that I would never hurt you. Today I did, and I am so sorry Laura. I didn't mean to do it."

"Let's go inside, dinner is going to burn."

"No it's not, I turned the oven off. I wanted to take a long, slow shower, with you."

"Are you going to wash my hair?"

"Yes, and I'm going to leave the conditioner in for 10 minutes, just like the bottle recommends."

"Are we going to run out of hot water?"

"I have a 150 gallon hot water heater, set at 130 degrees. It is powered by solar energy during the day and gas at night. I could keep you here until midnight and not run out of hot water."

"It's just about midnight now."

"Are we out of hot water?"

"No."

"Didn't I tell you so?"

"Love me, or kill me Adam, but please shut up."

They didn't run out of hot water, even when the sun peaked its head up in the morning, when they were in bed.

Laura advanced her knowledge of sex with this man 1000 fold to the joy, and agony of Adam. He demanded to know where she learned to squeeze the bottom of his penis to keep him from ejaculating, and she wouldn't tell him.

"Remember baby, turnabout is fair play."

For almost the next hour, Adam tortured Laura, bringing her close to the precipice, but denying her the orgasm that she so desired.

As he brought her to the peak again he said, "Tell me Laura, and I'll let you cum."

"Please Adam, you're killing me."

"Death by orgasm is wonderful. Tell me, and I will give it to you."

"You will laugh at me if I tell you."

"Let me laugh and I'll let you have the best orgasm imaginable."

"If you are lying to me, I will have Phil kill you."

"Tell me.

"My grandfather told me how to do it."

"You have to be kidding me. That old man told you how to delete an orgasm?"

"You better never called him old to his face. Patrick is only 13 years old, and Jemma always walks around with a smile on her face. Now, you owe the best orgasm imaginable, or do I call Phil?"

"Bring your knees to your nose and don't let them go. My tongue is going to play with your hymen, and when I am finished with you, we are going to have to sleep in another room."

"Why can't we change the sheets instead?"

"Because the mattress will be soaked with your fluids. Now, pay attention to a very talented tongue.

Laura thought he was bragging, when he said his tongue was going to play with her hymen. What she didn't understand was the position she was in shortened her vaginal canal by three inches. Not only could he touch her hymen with his tongue, he could see it clearly.

"Your hymen is beautiful dear. Would you like me to take a picture of it so you can see it?"

"Maybe on our wedding night, before I throw your cell phone in the toilet and clog your drain with it. However, I'm still waiting for my mind blowing orgasm, and you have yet to deliver it."

"Your wish Madam is my command."

Adam's face disappeared between her thighs, and in a millisecond, Laura screamed in pleasure. His teeth were attached to her clitoris, and two fingers of his right hand were rubbing against the inner folds of her vagina. Adam opened his mouth and let his tongue began to torment her. He licked and sucked on the large labial walls, and every time he passed her opening, he gave it a quick lick, and moved on.

Laura screamed his name, grabbed his hair, and begged him to stop teasing her.

"My grandfather didn't teach me this, but it is effective isn't it?"

She jerked his head up and looked him in the eye.

"I am going to do something I have never done before. I am going to go into the bathroom, lock the door, and make myself cum. I just can't stand anymore of your teasing. I'm not used to this. It may be good for some girls with experience, but I have none. I don't know how to handle this. This is the second time tonight we have disagreed with one another. I'm beginning to wonder if we are right for one another."

"You are giving me confusing signals baby. I have experience, and I know what women like. If you want me to come to bed with you, give you an orgasm, and go to sleep, I can do that for you. Today you delayed my orgasm, and seemed keen to find out what it would be like if I delayed yours. That's what I was doing. You had six mini-orgasms, which you can see by the wetness of my face, and on the sheets. I could have given you the big one anytime I wanted, but you seemed like you wanted to continue playing.

You have to tell me what you want, or I will never know. I don't know if you want to use hand signals, or words when you're ready, but unless you tell me, I cannot read your mind. I told you before I don't want to lose you. I will do anything in my power to keep that from happening. You have to help me Laura, or we may as well go back to putting clothes on, until we get married."

"I don't want to put my clothes on Adam. I will buy a Latin dictionary, and we will use words from it to tell you what I need, or what I want."

"What happens if I want something?"

"That's easy, you can't have it."

"I think I want to renegotiate my part of that deal."

"If you give me the big one, I'm going to need another shower."

"I'll make sure you squeaky clean, and put more conditioner in your hair."

"Can you really see my hymenCan you really see my ?"

"Yes I can."

"Would you get my cell phone please?"

"Hedonist."

"No, just curious. How many girls know what they are going to lose, before they lose their virginity?"

"Here's your phone."

"You are going to take the picture. It's a one-shot deal, and then I'm going to erase it. Please keep this between us."

"Always Laura."

She pulled her knees up as high as they would go, and turned her head to the side. Adam played with her clit for a moment to get her petals to moisten and open naturally. Seconds later, Laura heard the click of her cell phone.

Adam didn't look at the picture. He wanted her to be the first to see it. He had seen it live, and touched it with his tongue and fingers. He would remember it always, especially on December 26, when he took it from her."

"Is that the whole thing? Is that what all men desire to take from a woman? What is the big deal?"

"You are too cute Laura. It's like a ribbon cutting ceremony for an interstate highway, or a new bridge. Every man wants to say he was the first one to open it."

"It must be the blood. Everyman loves to blood his enemy."

"I never looked at it that way, but it could be true."

"90 percent of the men in this world are pussy whipped. If a wife wants something, she uses her pussy to get it. If her husband does something wrong, the wife's pussy is closed. I don't want that between us. I don't want us to go to bed angry. I want all our arguments to be left outside our bedroom door."

"I love the way you think. I love the way you look. I love the way you feel. Five more weeks, and that piece of flesh is mine."

"You better be a good boy, or I will go to the hospital and have them snip it."

"It would not matter to me. I love you, not just that piece of flesh. Promise you'll talk to me, before we start to argue. If I don't know what you're thinking, I won't know what to do about it."

"I promise, but remember this relationship stuff is very new to me, and you are my first boyfriend.""

"If I have my way Laura, I will also be your last boyfriend. I will also be your first and last husband."

"I like that last part, too."

**********************

Stephano was on the phone, when Patti burst in to his office.

"She won; Sandy Hastings won the election for governor in a landslide. There were almost 9 percentage points between her, and her opponent. They are calling it the biggest political route in the history of Maryland."

"Should we call the advisor to the Governor-elect of Maryland to congratulate him on a job well done, or do you think he's busy screwing the Governor-elect of Maryland to put a smile on her face for her acceptance speech this evening."

"I just think this is hysterical. Robert makes an offhanded remark to me about politics. I call Clark, and he sets up a phone call between Cindy and Robert. Robert makes such an impression on Fred that he is made a top advisor to Sandy's campaign. Whenever you see a picture of her, he is in the picture standing close-by. Sandy's campaign goes from four points down to winning by more than eight points. How good is our son Stephano?"

"Do you want the scary answer, the really scary answer, or the answer that's going to blow your mind?"

"You have me shaking already Steph, how much worse can it be?" 

"Each Hastings girl is brilliant. Sandy and Cindy are 44 years old. Danni and Debbie are 43. What would happen if all four of them became pregnant by Robert? 

"It would ruin Sandy's political career." 

"No. She would announce, in advance, she is going through 'in vitro' to become pregnant. She is still too traumatized by the images of her mother's past to get married. She wants a chance to have a child of her own, before she becomes too old. There will be the usual uproar, from the far right religious groups, but the women's groups will stand beside her. Shortly afterwards, Cindy, Danni, and Debbie will announce that they too are joining their sister in an attempt to become pregnant by in vitro fertilization. They didn't want the new governor elects child to be lonesome."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 29



"The political cartoonists will have a field day with it, and so will Robert. The poor boy will be exhausted, but look at the possibilities that will come afterwards."

"Stephano, I need a drink. I need a lot of drinks. I think I want to get drunk."

"Okay, I'll call William and Jemma, to see if they want to join us. We will have a party. I will ordered Chinese food. This way, when we get really hungry later, we can order Italian."

"Why aren't you thousand pounds Stephano?"

"Look who's talking Patricia. You were 5'2" and 102 pounds when we met. You are 5'2" and 102.5 pounds today. The extra one half pound is only because you just drank a bottle of water."

"I keep my weight down, because my husband gives me a lot of exercise. I do a lot of aerobics, core, and gymnastics exercises, when we are alone."

"I do my best dear. Let's call Robert, and leave him a message on his cell phone. He will probably answer us after the inauguration."

**********************

Dycke called me a few hours after he spoke with Payne.

"I don't know what to say Even. I haven't yelled at or threatened Payne, since the day we met. I did today, and I am furious with her. I never had to control these feelings of rage with her. I am afraid I will hurt her, when she gets home."

"There is a better way Dycke. There is a much better way to handle this situation. Do you trust me?"

"Of course I do, Even. I know this situation is going to get out of control."

"I'm not going to tell you everything I know. I am just going to tell you to be at the launch site Christmas Day, with Payne, and Zoey at your side. You can sit in the VIP seats that will be reserved for you the three of you, or you can sit in the general audience seating. We want Payne to be comfortable having Zoey at her side. You must be there. If you are not there, you will lose Payne forever."

"You know I will do anything in my power not to lose her Even. Without her, I am nothing."

"I know Dycke. Keep this part of our conversation to yourself, and as far as your other problem goes, don't hurt her. Don't hit her. She is expecting you to punish her. Deny her what she is expecting. Destroy your paddle and leave it somewhere she can see it when she walks in. Don't touch her; don't kiss her, and don't tell her you love her. The pain of not hearing those words from you will be worse than the sting of that paddle."

"Even that is cruel, not only to Payne, but to me."

"Those are your two choices my friend. Abuse her body and you will see the results for weeks on end. You will feel like a monster for hurting her.

Or you can make her reached deep into her soul, and see what a terrible mistake she has made separating these children, the way her mother tried to separate the two of you. Bring your parents into the picture. They will be very disappointed with her."

"Okay Even, I'll do it your way. If I show up on December 25 in a body cast, you will know why."

"You can't do that Dycke. I'm going to have a rush job for you coming up very soon."

"You leave in six weeks Even. A rush job should have been put in six months ago."

"Newton just asked me yesterday. How could I ask you six months ago?"

"What does he want to do?"

"Are you sitting down?"

"Are you asking me if I should be lying down?"

"Yes, that would be safer."

"All right Even, I am lying down on the office floor. What does Newton want to do?"

"He believes he has a way to send radio signals faster than the speed of light."

There was no response from the other end of the phone.

"Dycke are you still there? Dycke speak to me. Open your eyes, breathe, and speak to me."

"I'm all right. I want to know one thing, what happened to a message being sent in a bottle?"

"Fortunately, that went out with our forefathers."

"How is an 11-year-old boy going to break the laws of physics and several other sciences and have radio signals move faster than light?"

"How did I get radio waves to move around mountains?"

"You got lucky."

"As I recall, your wife gave me a very large check that day, along with four other people. Boeing's check came the next day."

"How much time am I going to have to perform this miracle?"

"Newton is going to be working with Delicious, Gray and me for as many hours as he can stay awake. As soon as the three of us see where he is going, we will continue working on it, until he wakes up the next day. You should have at least three or four to get it done."

"I'm sure I can put something together in three or four weeks that will work."

"Days, Dycke, three or four days. It will be all hands on deck, and I don't care how much money it costs, but I want six of them on board the spacecraft, plus parts for 10 more."

"Should I tell you where to go, even though you're going there already Even?"

"My friend, how many times have I asked you to do the impossible, and you have made it possible. I believe the last one was my son's freezer line. You said all you had to do was to go through the exterior shell, and through 505,000 gallons of water. Then you had to pierced the secondary hull and go through 22 million bearings that will be spinning at 17 revolutions per second. After you completed that, all you have to do is mate it to the freezer connections. Would you care to explain to me how you did it, because it was impossible to do?"

"Doctor Luck if you were not at the top of my list of the people I hated most in this world already, I would put you there now."

"You could always put me in first second and third place Dycke."

"Thank you Even, I never thought of that. I will erase my entire list, and put you into every slot."

"You can't do that, you have to leave one slot for Gray."

"As usual you are right Even. Doctor Grayson Thyme will be number 999."

"I'm sure he will be honored. Be at the launching ceremony Dycke, your future happiness depends on it."

"We will be there, even if I have to tie them up to do it."

"There are certain drugs that work better than ropes. I will send you some if you want."

"Even, it's illegal to use a drug on a person, when it is not prescribed for them, and you know it."

"Who said the drug was not going to be prescribed for Payne and Zoie?"

"I have just knocked Doctor Thyme off my list. You are now number 999 also."

"I am truly honored. Should I make a speech?"

"Yes, read it to Jennifer. She's the only one who would be interested in hearing it."

"I can't, I'm going to be in trouble with her very soon."

"Wonderful, tell me what you did wrong so I can celebrate."

"You will hear about it soon enough, but I'm not telling anyone yet."

"You spent all your money?"

"Dycke, 1000 women, working 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year, in Paris' most expensive stores wouldn't put a dent in the interest we are making our money Dycke."

"Disgusting is in it?"

"No one can say we aren't busting our asses to earn it. How much sleep have you gotten in the last year Dycke?"

"Sleep, I used to know that word. Every time I doze off some idiot from one of my factories calls and tells me they have a problem. It seems some asshole in Temple has sent them another schematic for a fiber, or a powder that turns into flexible clear plastic that is bulletproof, and they can't get the formula right. I finished eating dinner, and head back to the factory."

"Have you ever thought about putting in a pneumatic tube from your building to your office?"

"Even, you are a genius. Why didn't I think of that? I was thinking of using a helicopter to go to work, but there would be a problem with the airport all the time. Your pneumatic tube idea is absolutely brilliant. We can use the fibers instead of steel to show everyone how strong, and flexible they are. God Even, what am I going to do without you?"

"Do you want me to have Richard and Holden work out the details for you?"

"You son of a bitch. You had to do that, didn't you? It's not bad enough I'm going to be working with them, until the day I die, but you had to say they were going to work up this idea of yours."

"I was only joking with you Dycke."

"I wasn't Even."

"Have your secretary put a pillow under your head, a blanket over your body, and close the lights in your office. You need sleep my friend. You are getting a little touchy."

"Only a little; I'm ready to scratch your eyes out. I'll talk to you again Even. Goodbye."

"Sleep, my friend, sleep, your body needs it." 

"I have something else we must talk about, and I'm deadly serious. This came directly from Teddy, and if we don't do something about it, your family is going to be destroyed. If you don't want to hear it from me, I'll take care of it myself, in due course.

If you want to know what Teddy said, remember how she predicted that one of Payne's aircraft's engines was bad. Do you want me to continue, or take care of it myself?"

"Do you remember what I said about anyone taking Payne away from me?"

"Why do you think I'm asking you this question? That's how important this information is to you, and your family's future."

"I am still lying down Even, tell me everything, and don't leave a word out."

****************

"Mom, where do daddy's parents live?"

"If this isn't a set up, I've never seen one. You know damn well, where your grandparents live. Why do you ask Deborah?"

"Being good and devoted grandchildren, who have not seen their grandparents in over three years, and having a parent who has come into newfound wealth, and children who have a five day weekend coming up, Rebecca, and I have decided that we are going to visit them, with or without their parent."

"Exactly how are you going to get from St. Louis to Chicago?"

"On US Airways flight 5149, departing Wednesday morning at 8:53 AM, arriving Chicago Midway Airport 9:45 AM."

"Who is paying for your tickets?"

"You are such a wonderful and trusting mother. The charges will appear on your next American Express bill."

"Naturally you bought the tickets over the Internet."

"Naturally."

"The tickets are nonrefundable."

"You are so smart mom."

"Why am I so anti-guns?"

"For the exact reason you are thinking of killing your two beautiful daughters. In one moment, you will realize we bought you a ticket also. We didn't want you to sit at home, alone, and be bored to tears without us."

"How can I ever be bored with, or without you two around?"

"Are you saying our personalities are challenging?"

"I'm saying if I sent you to a psychologist, he would pay me not to send you anymore."

"Mom, that's another way for us to make money."

"Don't you have a test tomorrow?"

"Yes, but I'm going to ace it."

"If you don't, you are cleaning the entire house tomorrow night, by yourself."

"Anything you want mom, I am going to ace this test."

"I'm very happy that you are so confident in your abilities. I pray that you only get a 99 instead of 100."

"Now that's mean mom that is really mean spirited."

"Tell that to my American Express card."

"Rebecca made the reservations, and the aircraft was booked solid. She wheeled, and dealed, and did the only thing possible to get us on that aircraft."

"What Did She Do?"

"I'm not sure, you better ask her."

Sandra screamed, "Rebecca, get your butt in here."

"Yes gorgeous mother of mine."

"You purchased tickets for us to go to Chicago using my American Express card. Is that correct?"

"Yes, Deborah and I thought it was long overdue for us to see dad's parents. He is leaving soon. I didn't know if they were going to be there to see him off or not. I know we are not going to be there, even though Debbie and I would love to kiss him goodbye. It would hurt you too much to see him leave. Neither of us wants to hurt you like that, so we will watch it on television."

"Rebecca, you have to become a lawyer. You are the best I have ever seen at being asked a question, and after you begin answering it, you end up 10,000 miles away from the point."

"Becky and I practice that every night mom. We are really good at it. We drive our teachers crazy."

"Keep quiet Deborah."

"Yes ma'am."

"Rebecca, let's return to US Air flight 5149, and three round-trip tickets to Chicago from St. Louis. How much did they cost me?"

"$1249 and change."

"That's not too bad. Your sister had me worried."

"Each."

"Did you say each?"

"Yes, we're flying first class."

"We are going first-class for a 45 minute flight for $1250 round-trip?"

"$1250, plus taxes and fees. However, we don't have to pay for our luggage, because were flying first class."

"Now isn't that nice. The people in the back of the plane are probably paying about $150, plus $25 per bag, and we are paying $1250 each. However, we don't have to pay the $25 per bag. We should thank them for being so kind."

"Our drinks are free, and we get off the airplane first."

"If the airplane crashes, we die first."

"It keeps the suspense down."

"Rebecca, why do you have your father sense of humor?"

"He must have been very funny."

"He had his moments. Did anybody bother calling your grandparents to tell them we are coming?"

"Mom, give us some credit, of course we called. We left a message on their machine."

"After I kill you two, I'm going to hire somebody to really hurt you."

"Isn't that a waste of money?"

"It's my money, not yours, mine."

"She's getting testy Rebecca. We better humor her for a little while."

"Be quiet their phone is ringing."

"Hello Joan, this is Sandra, Joe's wife."

"Hello Sandra, Joseph said he saw you recently."

"Yes we did see him, and it was wonderful to be with him again. I really don't want to discuss it on the phone, but would you like some company for a few days starting Wednesday?"

"Sandra, I am saving the message Rebecca left on my machine for eternity. I have never laughed so hard in my entire life. I changed the tape immediately and put a new one in, because I didn't want anything to happen to that one. I'll play it for you when you get here. What time you arrive at Midway?"

"It's US Air flight 5149, and we arrived just before 10 o'clock. Let me warn you about these girls of mine. They will talk both your ears off at the same time. They are delightful, but they can talk to a wall until it falls down."

"Isn't that what we women do Sandra?"

"These two are women on super-speed, and I love them dearly."

"It's been a long time since we've seen them, and we can't wait. We will pick you up at the airport at 10 o'clock."

"Thank you Joan, it will be good to see you and Sam again."

*****************

"Do you remember what message you left for your grandparents Rebecca?"

"Of course mom, it was just a little bit of this, and a little bit of that, and when we were coming in."

"Well, your grandmother was so hysterical over it; she is saving it for posterity. She is going to let me hear it when we get there."

"Debbie, remind me to take my magnets."

"Young one, if that tape gets erased, you will start working the midnight shift at McDonald's, when you turned 16."

"Where has your sense of humor gone mom?"

"I believe it went when I heard $1249 plus tax and fees each."

"I told you we should have left the night before, and stayed at a hotel. $198 each, round-trip, the cost of a hotel room overnight, plus meals would not have upset her this much."

"We could have done this trip for $1000, instead of $4000, by leaving the night before? I am buying a big gun."

"Becky, I think it's time for us to tell her the truth. I believe she's really getting angry with us."

"Should I tell her we hired a private jet, or should I tell her the truth truth?"

"If you tell her the private jet story, I'm heading for the hills."

"Mom, you stay on your side of the table, and we will stay on ours."

"Is this story going to save me money?"

"Mom, you are living in the dark ages. You no longer have to live on $200 a month. You have $210 million in the bank. Try to relax and enjoy it."

"It's not as easy as throwing a switch girls. I never fell out of love with your father in all the months we were separated. It's going to take me a while to get use to having all this money."

In duet they said, "Can we help you?"

"No."

"How did we know you were going to say that to us?"

Sandra was about to answer that question, when they answered it themselves.

"Because we are brilliant."

"Would you to get back to my American Express card please."

"Mother, you have a one track mind."

"I may have a one track mind, and right now it's on my American Express card."

"Our airline tickets cost $213.87 each, round-trip, including tax and fees. Our first piece of luggage is free. The total on your American Express card is $641.61. Everything else we told you is true and correct."

"If your father and I had a choice, we would still have fertilized your two eggs. You two drive me bananas."

The two girls looked at each other. Rebecca asked Deborah, "Do you want to take this one, or should I?"

"It's too easy for me, you do it."

"Okay. Mother, with all due respect, and honor as you are the head of this wonderful household; you do not need to drive to go bananas. Its not even a long walk. A few short steps will do it."

Sandra screamed. Deborah and Rebecca scattered, laughing at her reaction.

"There will be no more school for you two."

Deborah replied, "Is that supposed to be a punishment, or a privilege?"

"I'm sending you two to reform school in Louisiana. I hope you love the heat."

"Does that mean no more snow? No more freezing winters? I can go along with that. We will be model prisoners, and cause no one any problems."

"I hate you both."

"We hate you too mom."

"I'm going to cut your allowance in half."

"How can you cut something we don't receive?"

"I was thinking about giving you one."

"Is that like buying a gallon of milk, and leaving it at the store?"

"I need to get laid; you guys are too fast for me."

"I thought you said the only person you ever wanted to go to bed with was daddy."

"That's true, but you two really fucked that up, didn't you?"

"If we used that word, you would threaten to wash your mouth out with soap."

"I know, but it was the appropriate use of the word this time. Do you know what the word 'fuck' means?"

"It means two people having sex."

"It means no such thing. It's an aberration of the original meaning. In the Complete History of the English Language, the first definition of the word fuck is 'to plant a seed with a stick.' Anyone that tells you otherwise is an idiot."

"Becky, I can't wait to use that word on a term paper for Miss Chapelton. Her sandpaper panties will go wild, and she will kick me out of her class. I will spend the day in the principal's office. I will be able to prove to the principal that she is wrong. She will have to apologize to me, in front of her, for not knowing the appropriate use of the word. For an English teacher, that will be a bitter pill to swallow, and that will be a wonderful way to spend my day."

"Do you two spend the evenings plotting against adults?"

"Not always mom, sometimes we plot against the boys in our class, who think they really have their act together."

"Don't tell me, I really don't want to know."

"We don't give them wedgies, or anything like that mom."

"I'm so pleased to hear that, but don't tell me anymore, I may pray to go deaf."

"How would we tease you then?"

"You two would probably learn sign language, better than I know it."

"You give us too much credit mom."

"I always get in trouble, because I give you two too little credit. Go take your shower's, take care of your needs, and go to bed. You have terrorized me enough for today. Save the rest for your teachers tomorrow, while I try to recuperate, and prepare for whatever you have in store for me when you get home after school."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 29



"We never plan that far ahead mom. We take things as they become available to us."

"Showers, and bed, my mind has taken all it can of you two today."

"You are a multi-millionaire. Relax, and try to enjoy it."

"I will try."

**********************

141. Visions

My family; from Jennifer to Holden, were standing in front of 'The Best Luck 1', when she exited the SUV. Our normally reserved agents hovered around her, like bees in a field of honeysuckle. Jeff had to tell most of them to return to their posts, while others carried her cameras and other equipment. I nearly laughed, when Jeff took her arm, and put it through his. He explained to her he was going to lead her through the system of bear traps meant to keep any unwanted guests away from the spacecraft."

Gray leaned over to me and said, "Are you sure she is almost 70 years old?"

That statement earned him an elbow to his ribs from Delicious.

"Keep it in your pants Grayson, or I will delight in cutting it off."

Teddy said to my fiery daughter, "No do, more baby come."

"I know sweetheart, it was just a figure of speech."

"More flies sugar, then vingar."

"Banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup."

"Everyone?"

"I love you Teddy."

"Love my mommy."

As they cleared the bear trap area, I stepped forward, with Jennifer at my side.

"Miss Welch, it is truly an honor for me to meet you. This is my wife Jennifer."

"Doctor Luck, Jennifer, please call me Raquel, and the pleasure is all mine. That is a stunning machine behind you."

"If you are talking about the line of people behind me, you are correct. They were the driving force that helped me build this wonderful Spacecraft. 150 scientists, and laboratory specialists, in our main building, deserve a great deal of credit. We are approaching 900 patents over the eight year span we have been building The Good Luck 1.

I will introduce you to them, but there will not be a test afterwards. Two names will stick in your mind, because they have begun designing 'The Best Luck 2.' It will dwarf anything that has ever flown before. It will be 1000 feet in diameter, and will be the first spacecraft to carry paying passengers, on a 10 year, round-trip flight to the stars, and return to earth safely. Let me introduce you to everyone now."

I started with Delicious, and told Raquel about her Magnetic Drive Engines. 

I proceeded to Gordon and told her how he cracked the code to make Nuclear Fusion Power Plants easy to start, without using high energy microwave pulses to start the reactors, and how they would work for six to 8 generations, without leaving any nuclear waste behind, or needing any major overhaul.

Raquel recorded every word for her upcoming article, and was suitably impressed by everyone. However, when I reached Richard, Holden, and Spaceship 2, her jaw nearly hit the floor.

"Doctor Luck, are you telling me that your 6 and 11-year-old sons are smart enough to design, and build the second spacecraft and it will be ready to fly around the universe, in 10 years, at approximately the same time NASA will be sending Orion to Mars?"

"I don't want you to put my boys names into your article. It is privileged information. If it gets out, they will never have a life of their own. Both of my sons have tested out of high school already. We will not bother them with any college degrees. They are not necessary for the work they are doing.

My attorney, Rod Laver, will protect them, and their privacy, like a rabid dog. Anyone breaching their privacy will find themselves in court, for the rest of their natural lives."

"I have received your message loud and clear Doctor. Their names will not be associated with your next spacecraft, in my article."

"Would you like to begin your tour of the inside of the spacecraft?"

"I have been waiting for this day, since you first gave me permission to come here. Where do we start?"

"We start in the elevator, of course."

****************

When we've reached the second floor, security was waiting with our flight suits at the ready. Our names were emblazoned on the left side of our chests. 

They helped Miss Welch put hers on first. It was a little snug around her chest, but it would do.

Newton was excited, when he put his on. Teddy went ballistic, when she saw hers. On the left side was her name, and on the right, it said, "Commander." It was the only pink flight suit we had made.

Flight crew qualified members wore sky-blue. Scientists wore gray, electricians wore bright orange, and so on. It wasn't that we were expecting trouble, while we were in flight, but color-coding everyone made it easy to understand why someone was in a particular area of the ship.

We brought Raquel up to level 5, explained what was there, and told her she could take pictures of everything. Since she was not allowed to have her crew with her, we were volunteered as her pack animals.

I never knew what it took to be a great photographer. I thought you picked up the camera, focused through the lens, and pushed the button. I was so wrong.

She gave Newton a light meter, and told him where to stand. She asked him for the reading on the meter. She changed either the camera or the lens, and took several shots of the same scene. She took a different camera, and a different lens, and did the same thing without moving one square inch. I had no idea why, and I didn't ask, because I did not want to show my ignorance.

After an hour, we moved down to level four. This floor was for our sleeping quarters, cooking area, and arboretum. We tried to arrange this area as a family area, and a gathering place, '10 Forward' for you Star Trek fans. 123 of our patents existed, because of this floor. 

In the private dwellings, the walls, floors, and ceilings were designed to absorb sound, as sponges absorb water. Instead of convex roofs over our rooms, we designed concave roofs, with baffles, to have to sound bounce down into the room, and to get lost among the baffles.

Again, Raquel took pictures from every direction, and angle. She took many pictures while lying on the floor, and hundreds of others, while standing on Gray's shoulders.

She was so limber, quick, and active, he asked, "Are you really going to be 70?"

Delicious was so angry with him, she turned red. She began moving towards him, raising her hand as she went.

Teddy pulled on her ear. "No hit daddy. Be nice."

"Baby, you never ask a lady her age. It's against the rules."

"Who say?"

"Am I going to lose another argument to you?"

"Love my mommy."

"Love my Teddy."

"I know."

"You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"I know."

"No banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup."

"Stay up night, talk in box."

"Teddy, you are as obstinate as I am."

"Grow tall like daddy, mouth like mommy."

"We are going to have such fun with that. I hope we don't kill each other."

"I help mommy, mommy help me. Be fine."

**************************

Raquel asked, "Did that baby just have a conversation with her mother?"

"This is off the record. Teddy has been talking since a few days after she was born. Her language skills were very simplistic back then. Now they are much improved. There are many other things she can do. However, the most important one is she will be the first officer on our Spacecraft. That is not an honorary title. It has been decreed that she will take over for me, when I die. I just got over a very serious battle with pancreatic cancer. At this moment, I am in remission. It may never come back, and it may come back at any time. Every member of our crew is aware that she will be the second in command while I am alive, and the captain after I pass away."

"Who told you that she has to take over for you when you pass away?"

"Let me say that I had a dream, and a higher authority ordered me to do it."

"Can I print that statement?"

"Sure, everyone's been calling me crazy most of my life. This will prove to them that they are correct."

*********************

As soon as we were standing on the third floor, she picked up a camera and began to focus in on a restricted area. I stood in front of her to block her view.

"Raquel, you cannot take close-up pictures of the computers, or the workstations. Everything there is off limits to you, because it is all proprietary.

What you can do is take long distance shots of that area, and we will vet those pictures to verify that even magnified nothing can be taken off of them. From the airshaft back, there are only a few proprietary items, and we will point them out to you as we go."

These were the pictures she wanted desperately, and we had just taken them away from her. However, I was not going to give away eight years of hard work, and many of our patents for a photo array in December's magazines.

**********************

We were back at level 2. 

"Raquel, if it doesn't belong any place else on the ship it comes here. This floor is for storage. Everything is locked down, tighter then a drum. As you can see, it is stacked from ceiling to floor. We don't know if or when we will ever be able to resupply. We have to take everything we can with us, and hope for the best. Starting on December 20th, we will begin loading 505,000 gallons of pure water into the exterior shell of the spacecraft. This will do two things for us. It will protect us from spaces' harmful radiation, and provide us with our water, for drinking and our other needs. No water will be wasted. It will be constantly recycled through a tertiary recycling system located on the first floor. Each person will be restricted to 22 ounces of drinking water per day, starting with day one. All of us may as well get used to it as soon as we start our trip into space."

I had no clue what she found so interesting about photographing supplies, but I don't believe she missed one isle, or one item of food, including Gray's freezers. He stood in front of them proudly.

Finally, we made it down to the first floor, our engineering section, and as she was setting up the kids began to complain.

Holden said, "Mom, I'm hungry, can we get something to eat please?"

Richard joined in, and a half second later so did Newton.

Teddy said, "No banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup; no eat."

Delicious blew a huge burst of air against Teddy's belly.

"Good, you're beginning to look like a balloon."

Teddy laughed, "Not."

Jennifer said, "We will take the children who want to eat to a restaurant. Those who wish to stay with Miss Welch can. We will meet up at home later."

"Thank you dear, I don't want to rush her. Whenever she's finished, we will escort her off the property; give her the credentials for Christmas Day, and part company."

She whispered into my ear, "I want to look like her when I am 70."

"You will be more beautiful than she is when you are 90 years old."

"Flatterer."

"Telling the truth is not flattery. I love you Jen, I always will."

"You son of a bitch, I have never been more positive of anything in my entire life."

"Get out of here, before I fuck you on the floor in front of everyone."

"You promised Holden an advanced education in sex. Now is as good a time as any."

"If we go to the fourth floor, we may never leave it."

"The children are hungry. They have to be fed first. When you get home, we can take care of the other thing."

"You should be happy you are wearing a flight suit, and not a skirt. Get out of here my love, I can smell you."

"What about that bulge going down your leg Even?"

"Jennifer feed the children."

"Spoiled sport."

I smacked her on her rump, kissed her, and took her to our children.

"Mommy's ready to take you to get something to eat."

I looked at Teddy and said, "Chicken will be good today. If you eat it all, and some French fries, mommy will get you banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, and cherries on top."

"Mommy say no."

"Grandpa say yes."

Teddy looked at her mother with questioning eyes.

"Okay, banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, and cherries on top, but you have to eat your chicken first."

The little redhead reached her arms out to me, and I took her from her mother. She kissed me on my mouth and said, "Good Captain."

I replied, "Good second officer."

She beamed with pride and kissed me again.

"Much to learn from Captain."

"Much to learn from second officer."

"Hungry must eat chicken."

"Wonderful second officer, go with mommy. Grow up big and strong like daddy"

She kissed me again, and I gave her back to Delicious. They were off to destroy a restaurant.

Raquel said, "You love your wife very much."

"Yes I do."

"How can you possibly leave her here, and go on a journey from which you will never return?"

"Initially, we were all supposed to go. However, two of my children, were afraid, and didn't want to go. Jennifer and I discussed it. She couldn't leave the children, without at least one parent to guide them as they grew up. She made the decision to stay with them, which broke both our hearts. She was supposed to be the captain of this ship. I was supposed be down in the engineering section. That's what I am; I am an engineer, and a scientist. Jennifer studied for years to become the Captain of The Best Luck 1. Everyone else spent years studying for their own positions. They elected me to be Captain."

We proceeded down to the first floor, and it took her breath away.

"Please tell me I can take pictures of everything that's down here."

"Yes you can, but some of it you have to take from a distance. I will tell you which ones. Do you want to see the nuclear engine first?"

"Is it safe?"

"I would not offer to show it to you if it wasn't safe. It's in a containment unit, and it's not like the nuclear fission plants around the world. This is my son, Gordon's, invention and there are so many patents on what you are about to see, there are too many to count. Come with me."

"It looks so small, how fast will it let you go?"

"Why don't you tell her Gordon?"

"Miss Welch, this little fusion engine will let us attain speeds between six and eight times the speed of light. In Star Trek terms, Warp 6 to 8."

"It's not possible to go faster than the speed of light. Every reputable scientist says so. Einstein said so, and no one has proved him wrong."

"My sister has proven that Newton's laws of physics are wrong. This ship has flown twice under its own power without the use of a propeller, jet engines, or rockets. The only thing we used was her 'Magnetic Drive Engines.' You can go to Houston, and ask them to show you the pictures of their aircraft following us while we were in flight. I doubt that they will show them to you, because they will be embarrassed. They have nothing like it, and they are so far behind our technology they will never admitted to the public."

"Why won't they ask to see what you're doing here?"

"The reason is very simple, and very complex. Congressman will cut off their funding. That's the answer to both questions. We are building our machine for about $330 Billion. We are coming in $20 Billion under budget. Orion and the rocket they are building to send it to Mars is a $1 trillion boondoggle. Do you know how many friends of Congressman are making money off of this new system they are building? Look at all the Congressional districts, which are making money, because of each of these Congressman? Look at Boeing, Lockheed, Martin Marietta, ITT, Northrup, IBM and every other company that has its hand out to get a piece of that $1 trillion. They would cut the legs off anyone at NASA who walked over here and found a way to send 70 people into space for $350 Billion. How long did it take the astronauts to get to the moon?"

"It took them nearly 3 days to get there, why?"

"Once we clear Earth's atmosphere at approximately 28,000 miles per hour, and we are only using Delicious 'Magnetic Drive Engines'. We will pass the moon in 12 seconds. 58 minutes later, we will pass Mars. That is when we will extend this 'little engine', and begin warming it up. When it's ready, we will increase its output incrementally. We will pass Jupiter doing .9 light speed. As we pass Neptune, we will be doing .98 light speed. At some point between Neptune and Uranus, we will have passed through light speed, and continue increasing at a regular rate. The only thing keeping us from going faster is the gravitational pull of the earth. Once we pass heliopause, the only thing that will keep us from going faster than 6 to 8 times the speed of light is the maximum output of this tiny engine. 

Everything I've said to you is true. All the telemetry will be sent back to earth in real time. We have something in the works now, which may shock the world, as we know. It's one of my little brother's ideas, and if we can get it done in time, we will install it onto the ship, as the patents are brought to Washington. My development of the fusion engine was extraordinary. If his comes to fruition, it will change everything you know, and believe forever."

"What is it with your family? You are all geniuses in your own right."

"You have to look at our parents. No one talks about our mother, but she is where it all begins. We are loved from the second we are created, and what no one realizes, is she is as smart as my father is. In our household she is not overshadowed by him, she is his equal. The conversations between them are breathtaking. They always allow us to listen in, or to join them by asking questions. You can't help but learn from them, if you're listening to them all the time. My brothers will tell you the same thing. It's like listening to a physics lecture every time we have dinner."

Everyone knows my father, and they all call him crazy. All of them should all be as crazy as my father is. Dad is a billionaire, because of the things he invents, while his scientist friends are struggling along on a salary at some educational institution. He has more patents to his name than any top scientist in the world. That was before he was talked into building The Good Luck 1. The spacecraft was not his idea. It was an idea that came about when I was 3 years old. We were downstairs in my dads Idaho Springs laboratory, when my sister, Delicious, made a remark about her Magnetic Drive Engines. My dad looked at her and said, "What do you want to do baby, build a flying saucer in the backyard?"

Our attorney, Rod Laver, said, "Even stop this, you're scaring me. The four of you have enough talent to do it, and people are going to think you're all crazy."

"The conversation continued, and names of Patti, and Laura Valentino, Harold Chase were brought up, because of their computer expertise. Dycke Schneider was added to the list, because of his engineering background, and his factories in the United States. A friend of my fathers', who helped him with his first patent, was also added to the list early on, Celeste Mesner. At that time, she was the 13th wealthiest person in the world. We were determined that every piece of equipment made for our ship would be made in the United States. 

Everything was built here, except for one thing. Sony provided the external cameras, and the internal viewing screens. No one in the United States manufactures these items to Sony's standards. 

I won't bore you with the rest of the stuff he went through, like getting the $350 billion to build this spacecraft; however, due to his prominence in the scientific community, it was easy for him to do."

"Easy my ass, it was only when William Zabo was added to our list of investors, the other 13 members join up to help us build this marvelous machine. No one puts $20 to $30 billion into a project that could fail, without seeing who else is going to be on the board of directors. It was Williams' presence that made everyone feel comfortable enough to join in this project."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 30



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion. 

***** 

144. Dark Matters 

It was our 2nd day working on Newton's machine. As with all inventions at the very beginning, it was slow going. At times, Newton would get angry with himself, and Gray or Delicious would take him outside and try to explain to him how hard it is to make something out of nothing. 

Delicious explained to her son how hard it was for her to develop the magnetic engines. How many peer-reviews she read, and how many mistakes she made. She emphasized to him that what he was trying to do was break totally new ground. What she was doing was only trying to prove that one of the theories of a great scientist was wrong." 

"What you are trying to do is brand new Newton. Everyone, in every part of the world, will know your name, if we can prove this theory of yours is right. All we have to do is stay calm, and focus on the problem. Getting angry or upset stops us from thinking properly. Let's go back inside and work out these problems. Okay baby?" 

"This is very hard mom." 

"If it wasn't hard, it wouldn't be worth doing, would it?" 

"No, I guess not. Let's go back to work." 

"No, let's go back inside and have some fun with science." 

"You always say that." 

"I say it because I mean it. Science is fun. Look at all the things science makes. We are going on the biggest adventures of our lives in 7 weeks, all because of science. Unless, of course, you want to stay here with Richard and Holden." 

"Mom, let's go back inside and have some fun with science. If you try to keep me off the Good Luck 1, I'm going to glue your shoes to the floor." 

"You don't know what shoes I'm going to wear." 

"Then I have to glue them all to the floor." 

"Come on stinky, let's go play." 

************************* 

We worked steadily, usually 12 to 14 hour days, on this project and we were still looking for a way to make light travel faster than light. 

Gordon looked at me from across the table. "We are going to be moving faster than light. Why can't we get light to move faster than it can? Why can't we just push it along?" 

"Save the easy questions for your sister Gordon. Ask me a hard one next time." 

"I'm not kidding dad." 

"I feel a headache coming on. This ought to be good. Go ahead Gordon." 

"There is no natural light in space. Everything we see out there is less than 5 percent of the known universe. What we are traveling through is called 'Dark Energy or Dark Matter.' If it was a gas and you lit a match, it would explode. We know it's not a gas. Maybe we can't make Newton's theory work on earth, because of the natural light from the sun. Who says it won't work once we get out to the dark areas of space, when we are past the moon or Mars. It's the only time anyone would need to use this type of speed anyhow." 

"I knew I was going to get a headache. How do we proceed to use 'Dark Energy', if we can't produce it here on earth? You can't capture it when you are in space, because it's a nothing. It's like trying to capture air in a bottle. Once you open the bottle, the air is already inside." 

"What happens to nothing when you add a little moisture, and heat to it dad?" 

"Did I ever tell you how much I dislike you Gordon?" 

"No I think this is the first time." 

"If you add water and heat to nothing on earth, you get a cloud. If you add enough water and enough heat, you get a very big cloud, and somewhere it's going to rain. Is that what you are thinking?" 

"It would exciting to send a message back to earth saying, "We made it rain in space." 

"We are going to have 505,000 gallons of pure water on this spacecraft, and I am not going to waste one drop to send a message back to earth saying, "We made it rain in space." 

"It was just a thought." 

"How did we get from Newton's machine moving faster than light, to you making it rain in space Gordon?" 

"I thought it was time to lighten up the atmosphere in this room, because everyone is overworking this problem, and it's time to go home. We are too tired to think. I think Newton deserves some ice cream. 

"Bannela ice cream, chocolate syrup." 

Standing at the door to our conference room, was Cee Cee holding Teddy, in her little warm-up jacket, with the hood up. Her nose and cheeks were as red as cherry tomatoes. She looked so cute bundled up. 

Delicious asked, "Is it that cold outside?" 

"No, it's very windy. The weatherman said there was a temperature inversion or something. The winds were going to get up to 60 miles an hour tonight, and tomorrow. He even said there was a possibility of something called, "Clear Air Lightning," whatever that is." 

"Thank you, we will see you the same time tomorrow?" 

"Yes Mrs. Thyme, no problem." 

"Come on Teddy, tell daddy to hurry, we are going to 'The Creamy Cow.' 

Gray took Teddy from her mother's arms. "Tell mommy to hurry, because daddy's ready. Did you know these trips to The Creamy Cow are putting weight on daddy? Pretty soon I'm going to look pregnant." 

"What do you mean pretty soon? The furthest you've run in the past year has been to the Creamy Cow, and the Pizza Palace." 

"What are we having for dinner tonight dear?" 

"Your favorite, Fettuccine Alfredo." 

Gray grabbed her, "That's good for my waistline too, isn't it?" 

"Gray, I'm giving you everything you love, because on the 25th of December, we are going on the leanest diet known to man, for the longest time you can imagine. Within a year, you will be down to your high school weight. Everyone else will be also. So eat up and enjoy yourself, I know I am." 

"Here I thought you finally learned how to cook." 

Delicious looked at him with fire in her eyes. "Teddy, yes or no?" 

"Bad daddy." 

"Thank you Teddy. 

"Dammit, did you have to hit me so hard?" 

"You have no idea how many times your daughter has saved you. I wanted to get a good one in." 

"I kissed Teddy, and took her into my arms. Take good care of mommy and daddy. No more fighting, okay?" 

"Okay grandpa, see you morrow. Mommy have answer, don't know it yet." 

"It's okay, she'll find it." 

I kissed my children goodbye, and they were off to put more calories into their bodies. Everyone else going on the trip was doing the same thing. The pizza Palace, McDonald's, Wendy's, Steak, and Shake, and every other fast food place within 50 miles was doing business at a record pace. 

Then November 15 hit, and it was time to choose a replacement for me to run the administrative side of the Good Luck 2. When we sent out the advertisement in the scientific journals, with the specific qualifications needed for the position, within 2 weeks we received over 850 resumes. Midnight, November 14 we had 2107. 

Thank God for Patricia Valentino. She had their names alphabetized by noon on the 15th. I was sitting at my desk with 2 markers, one blue, and one red. Blue meant possible, read meant no. My assistant sat next to me and separated the resumes into 2 piles according to my marks. 

At 3 o'clock, my secretary buzzed me. 

"Doctor Luck, there's a man here who demands to see you. He is very insistent, and will not give his name." 

"Did my wife send him with a gun?" 

"No Doctor, security checked him, and he has no weapons." 

"Let him in, and I'll kick him out." 

Joseph Oyster walked into my office. 

"I want that fucking job Even. I don't want to hear anything else but yes." 

"What about Orion?" 

"Orion is in a clean room, and will stay there, until that fucking rocket is ready. It could take another 3 or 4 years before they test that thing. We tested Orion on an Atlas, and it worked like a charm. We tested it again and it came back through the atmosphere at 23,000 miles an hour, without one fucking flaw. Give me that job or I'll kill you." 

"Where is your resume?" 

"I didn't want to waste the paper. You know what I did from beginning to end. Miss, please leave the room, I don't want you to see his blood flying all over this room." 

"Doctor Luck should I call security?" 

"By the time they get here, he will be dead, unless he gives me this job." 

"Okay Joseph you're hired. Are you happy now?" 

"No, I want $4 million a year plus benefits." 

"That's highway robbery, you can't have it." 

"I'm going to be doing 2 jobs Even. I'm going to be the administrative head of this company, and I'm going to be nursemaiding your children." 

"My children are so far ahead of you, and me Joseph, they will blow your mind away. They are smarter than Gordon was when he was 3 years old." 

"No shit, are you kidding me?" 

"They already have the engineering section of The Good Luck 2 finished. It's perfect down to the size and power output of the nuclear engines needed to move it. When I told them, nothing would be able to hold it up while it was being constructed, because it was bigger than an aircraft carrier they just smiled at me. 

"Water dad, we are going to build it on water. It was genius Joseph, pure genius." 

"I would never have thought about that possibility Even. It is pure genius. How do they anticipate getting it out of the water?" 

"The bottom of the lake is going to be concrete strong enough to hold the complete assembly. The legs will be in the places marked for them to fit appropriately with the engineering section. Everything will be sealed watertight to protect the electronics, elevators, landing gear, and the equipment inside them. The engineering platforms will be made on site but in 4 different pieces, using no metal. All the punch-outs, and pre-placement markings will be computer marked with millimeter tolerances. When they are finished, they will be rolled out and assembled, in place, over the landing gear. After they are sealed watertight, they will be joined to the legs. Those areas will be resealed, with heat-treated polyurethane, to make sure there is no water intrusion. 

The equipment will be brought in, installed, and tested. Then it will be sealed, in polypropylene to keep it dry. After that, the entire floor will be heat-sealed. The same will be done for the other 3 floors. 

The nuclear engines will not be installed, until the very last minute. As soon as the exterior shell is completed, the hard work begins. The crews have to remove every bit of the polypropylene, and other plastic materials that were used to cover, and waterproof the interior of the ship. That could take 3 to 6 weeks. 

When the time comes for the spacecraft to take its first test flight, they are going to drain the water from the pool first. They will unseal the legs; test the elevators, and all the electronics within them. 'The Good Luck 2' will lift off the ground, and follow its flight profile. 

A multitude of workers, and heavy equipment crews will remove the dirt, and plastic liner that made up the pool area, turning it into the beginning of Roman style, stadium seating. It will be improved upon as the ship is being fitted out. 

The people, who wanted to go on this unprecedented trip, will have paid for it well in advance. It will be a very expensive expedition. 10 years in space is not going to be cheap. A rough estimate would be between $30 and $50 million each. 

We will also hold a lottery for $50 apiece for 50 people who make a verifiable $30,000 a year or less. 

Richard and Holden will supervise the loading of the spacecraft with food and everything needed for the flight, and within 90 days of draining that pool, that ship will be flying off into space. 

If you feel like sticking around, Holden and Richard will begin working on number 3, as soon as number 2 has taken flight. Richard will be 20, and Holden will be 16." 

"Why do I have a feeling I'm going to be the dunce in this class?" 

"I've already hired you, and what I'm about to tell you is privileged information. Lie down on the floor; I don't want you to have to pay 'Workers Compensation' so soon." 

"Come on Even I'm a big boy, nothing you can say to me will knock me down." 

"Jesse would you put a cushion approximately where his head is going to hit the floor please." 

"I believe this is about right Doctor Luck. If he misses, he should have listened to you in the first place." 

"Thank you, would you leave us alone for a moment and close the door." 

"Joseph, we are in the middle of working on Newton's plan to move light faster than the speed of light." 

THUD! 

I opened the door and Jesse handed me a bottle of cold water. 

"Did he hit the pillow?" 

"Yes he did; dead center." 

I opened the bottle, and poured half of it on Joe's head. He was not happy with me, not at all. When he stood up, I handed him the remainder of the bottle so he could take a drink. 

"You are not kidding with me, are you?" 

"Would you like to sit in with us? Since I don't have to go through all these resumes, I can go back into the room with them and give them a hand." 

"Lead the way Even, I want to see what progress they made so far." 

We walked down to the first floor, and into the conference room to find paper airplanes floating all around. 

Joe said, "Is this the way you're going to figure out how to make light move faster than light?" 

Newton said, "My mom already found a way to do it, so were taking a break." 

I looked at Teddy. "Did you tell mommy how to do it?" 

"No grandpa, she do it." 

Oyster grabbed me by my neck. "Did that little thing just say what I thought she said, because if she said what I heard she said, I'm leaving." 

Gordon got up, and opened the door for Joseph to leave. 

"Close the goddamn door Gordon. I should've killed you when you were 3." 

"Doctor Oyster in our family, the younger you are the smarter you are. Age slows us down." 

"Promise me you'll throw him out, while you're in space Even." 

"I can't promise you that Joseph. Think about Gordon's DNA makeup, mating with Teddy's DNA. You might as well tell Exascale to move over." 

Teddy looked at Gordon and blew a raspberry. "No too ugly, too old." 

Gordon grabbed his heart and fell to the floor, as we all laughed. 

"Can I get back to the question I asked before? You figured out how to move light faster than light." 

"Why Do You Look so Confused Doctor Oyster? It was easy once we knew what we were looking for." 

"I know I'm going to regret this Even, but what were they looking for?" 

Newton said, "We were looking for something to make light smaller, not bigger, but smaller. A big aircraft flies slower than a small aircraft. A big ship moves slower than a small ship. Light travels in long waves. We wanted to find a way to make those waves shorter, so we could put more of them into a shorter space. Then we stick a message on its back, and send it to a specific place. My mom did it. I don't know how she thought of it, but once she shouted it out, everything else made sense. 

Teddy told me to go to grandpa's starting point. Grandpa's starting point was heat. He put too much heat into his figures, and out came the program for him to send messages over and around mountains. 

I should have kicked myself for not thinking of it before, but it was my mom who thought of the temperature variation. By bringing light down to minus 147 degrees centigrade, you shorten lights wavelength, which changes its characteristic. By compressing it, it speeds it up. Using the 'Minimal Supersymmetric Standard Model', we were able to solve the hierarchy problems and predict the superpartners with masses between 100 GeV and 1 TeV. Einstein's Theory of General Relativity, as it applies to Superstring Theory, will help guide the projectile home. We can attach a carrier of almost 2 MB of information on the light source, surround it with dark energy, and liquid helium and the capsule is ready to go. The reason to surround both the dark energy and light source with liquid helium is because the temperature is -269 centigrade. It will keep the capsule super cold, until it reaches Earth." 

Mister Schneider is going to kill you grandpa, because of the auxiliary propulsion unit. 

We all know lasers can't push, because they have no mass. However, if you put a body behind what you want to push, that body will give you all of it's possible momentum. We have to put a concave reflector disc behind that body, and focus the laser beams on it, making sure that it does not make contact with the capsule. Focusing the lasers on the back of the body begins moving our message back towards earth at 3.5 times the speed of light. Just before the body runs out, the lasers shut off so they do not harm the capsule. The capsule has an internal guidance mechanism, which will be no larger than a 16th of an inch in circumference. It is my fervent hope Mister Schneider doesn't kill you grandpa." 

"You kept saying the body. We put behind that, what is it going to be Newton?" 

"We haven't decided yet." 

"Is it going to be a heavy metal?" 

"Grandpa would I do that to you?" 

"No Newton, but your mother and father would." 

"We will let you know by tomorrow." 

"Oh no young man, your parents already told you what they want to use, because you said Mister Schneider is going to kill me. What is it, so I know what I'm going to die for?" 

"Vanadium." 

"Dycke is going to kill me painfully. He won't throw me over the balcony of his home, because that would be too merciful. Do you know how hard it is to get that element? Do you know how many government permits, and licenses, he is going to need to transport that material? Do you know why your parents made you tell me, instead of them Newton? They are closer to the door than you are Newton. 'Vanadium.' The only place in the world to get it is Sweden. Mexico ran out of their supply years ago, and so did Guatemala. Do you know what Sweden is like at this time of year?" 

"One more question before I ask you to dial a number for me Newton. Joseph, Gordon, would you stand by the exit door please. Neither my daughter or son is allowed out of this room. Teddy, you can always live with me." 

"Bannela ice cream, 2 scoops, chocolate syrup, sawberry syrup?" 

"If you eat your chicken first, I will even give you whipped cream, and cherries, bananas, and strawberries." 

Delicious yelled, "That's cheating Dad." 

"Vanadium isn't? By the way, how much of it do we need?" 

"How many did you say you wanted him to build, plus the spares?" 

"I told him I wanted 6 built and parts for 10 more that we can assemble on the ship." 

"What's the number Gordon?" 

"18.528 pounds." 

"20 pounds of Vanadium, and we need it here in less than 4 weeks. Does anyone know if the President has a mistress?" 

Teddy said, "No don't." 

"Thanks a lot Teddy." 

"Welcome grandpa." 

"Please dial this phone number for me Newton. 1-843-998-9989. Press the button that says speaker, and hang up the phone. Take your sister outside, there may be some bad language in this room in a few seconds, and I don't want either of you to hear it." 

****************** 

"Schneider Technologies." 

"Hello Cheryl, where is that lazy son of a bitch now?" 

"Hello Doctor Luck, haven't you left yet?" 

"If he would finish with the things I asked him to build, I would leave. As you know he is a slacker, and nothing gets done there." 

"God dammit Even, I can hear you in my office." 

"I'm calling with good news, and your complaining?" 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 30



"You never call me with good news. All you do is call with work that you want done yesterday." 

"Do you remember the work I said you would have 3 or 4 days to do?" 

"Yes I do. What do you want me to do now? Do you want me to get it done in one day, or do you need it today." 

"Do you see how wrong you are about me? I called to tell you that you have nearly 6 weeks to get it done. Newton and his staff have broken the code. He now knows how to make light move faster than light. What do you think of my son now?" 

There was no reply. 

"Get up off the damn floor Dycke. I'm tired of you sleeping on the job." 

"Doctor Luck, you are the only one that can do that to him. I'll get some water, and throw it on his face." 

"Get a gallon Cheryl, he deserves it." 

***** 

"Darn it Cheryl that was the best sleep I've had in weeks." 

"Maybe you should have the good doctor call you more often sir." 

"Every time he calls me it's bad news." 

"I resent that, I called with good news this time." 

"I know something bad is coming. What is it, Even? You are too happy. Where is the knife?" 

"Well, my grandson did tell me there is one small problem." 

"Whose small problem is it, Even? Is it your small problem, or my huge problem?" 

"You are such a pessimist Dycke. How much of a problem could it possibly be for you to pick up 20 pounds of Vanadium?" 

Cheryl yelled, "Doctor Luck if I were you I would leave the country. He's in the bathroom throwing up." 

"Dycke always did have a weak stomach. Start making calls around to all his sources Cheryl. Beg borrow, or steal every ounce of Vanadium you can get your hands on. Price is not an object, getting your hands on it is. You will get a bonus from me if you can get 20 pounds of it. Start with Svartliden Mining; they are the 2nd largest mining operation in Sweden. They are in Uppsala. If I remember correctly their phone number is 011-358-222-199-0003." 

"Why don't you give me the name of the largest company in Sweden?" 

"Cheryl, number 2 always tries harder to please their customers, especially when you tell them price is no object." 

"Mister Schneider always said you were a sneaky bastard." 

"That I am Cheryl. Is he out of the bathroom yet?" 

"No he's not; I think he's locked himself in there for the rest of the day." 

"Once you get 20 pounds, tell him, and maybe he'll come out. Send him home, he needs some sleep, better still, and let me speak to one of his agents." 

******************* 

"Hello Doctor Luck, this is Tom Brady, how can I help you?" 

"Hello Tom, a long time ago Dick had an agent by the name of Fiona, I don't remember her last name, because she got married to one of your agents. I believe she was his head nursemaid, while he was growing up. Then he got even by taking her gun away, and sent her to school for finance. Do you know who she is or where she is?" 

"Absolutely sir, her name is Fiona Short. She is the head of our Western Hemisphere Operations Center." 

"Do you know how I can get in touch with her?" 

"If you were here sir she's 2 floors up." 

"Could you ask Cheryl for her phone number please?" 

"Doctor, Cheryl is transferring you to her private line." 

"Thank you very much Tom." 

"Hello." 

"Hello Fiona, this is Doctor Even Luck. We have a mutual friend by the name of Dycke Schneider. At this moment, he is in his bathroom throwing up, and hiding, because of a job I gave him to do. Things are a little stressful around the Schneider household. I'll fill you in if you have time, before your boss has a nervous breakdown." 

"How bad is he, and how bad are things at his home?" 

"I'm ready to send him to a hotel so he can sleep and not be near Payne." 

"Oh shit, I'll send Bob; he will take care of it. Come up to my office, we will have coffee. I'm on the 6th floor; you can't miss me." 

"That would be a little difficult, since I'm in Texas." 

"I'm sorry Doctor I thought you were downstairs." 

"It's a perfectly natural assumption. Do you remember when Dycke and Payne were nearly torn apart by her parents?" 

"Yes I remember quite well." 

"Well Payne just did it between Zoey and my son, Gordon. Dycke is going berserk over this, and he is furious with Payne. My son is quite like Dycke was back then. He compartmentalizes everything, because as he said to Zoie, "Everyone loses in a fight like this." 

There is another problem. We have a little, 2 year old, redheaded girl that is very good at predicting things. She has never been wrong so far. She told Payne not to go home on the day she planned to leave, because there was something wrong with one of the aircraft's engines. We begged her to have the engines checked and sure enough, one of the engines blew apart while they were testing it. It had just been overhauled, and wasn't due for any maintenance for another 27,000 hours. 

Teddy said if Zoie stays with Payne, she is not going to live very long. She will die in an accident of some kind. 

Payne will be in hospital for many years, and she will never be the same. A few years after she comes home, Dycke will walk out on her. 

You can believe me or not, but this child has never been wrong, and I don't want to see my friend hurt. 

Dycke is starting to crack now, and the real pressure won't start until December. If there's anything you can do to help, please do it now before it's too late." 

"Do the parents know?" 

"I told Dycke to tell them." 

"I'll call them, and make sure they know." 

"He needs sleep; real uninterrupted sleep, and a lot of it. A trip to Sweden would be just what the Doctor ordered." 

"Why Sweden Doctor?" 

"We are trying to buy 20 pounds of Vanadium. Sweden is the only place in the world that has an established supply. A sudden trip, by a world famous CEO, and some members of his senior staff would not raise the suspicions of a skittish wife, especially if his chief financial officer and members of his senior staff went with him. 

"Trust me Doctor, he will sleep, or Bob will make sure he wakes up with a headache." 

"I think Bob and Gordon should meet. What are you doing the week before Christmas?" 

"We had not planned anything for the week before Christmas. We are going to Mallorca for 2 weeks, after New Year's." 

"Why don't you fly here to Austin? You can watch us take off on Christmas Day, and you can fly back to Charleston on the 26th." 

"We'd love to come out for Christmas." 

"Great, we will rent you a suite at the Hyatt; next to the one we will have Dycke, Payne, and Zoie being held captive in." 

"Thank you Doctor, that's very kind of you. I have a little expertise in keeping people quiet." 

"Take care of Dycke; he's very important to me. He is my best friend." 

"You can rest easy Doctor, he's in good hands." 

"I'm beginning to remember some of the stories he told me about you. I believe it began while Payne was in the hospital, recuperating from her operation. He went to visit the hospital administrator, and did not take a protection detail with him. When you returned with him several hours later, he was severely bruised, and monosyllabic. I would love to know the rest of that story." 

"I will tell you the remainder of the story over the Christmas holiday Doctor. I believe you will love it." 

"Is it going to embarrass him?" 

"I wouldn't tell it to you, if it didn't." 

"Wonderful!" 

********************** 

145. Strange Happenings 

"How is he Bob?" 

"He's unconscious, and he is totally drained. If we put him into a hospital, he won't stay there, because he's too proud. Do you know what's going on?" 

"Yes, I just found out what's going on, from Doctor Even Luck, no less. Payne just pulled the same thing her mother did on Dycke and her, on Zoey, and Gordon Luck. The wedding is off and she hasn't told anyone yet?" 

"There is less than a month to go, what the hell is she waiting for?" 

"That's not the point Bob. She pulled Zoey away from Gordon, just as Alletta pulled Payne away from Dycke. Dycke is so furious with her, he's not communicating with her. He may be speaking to her, but neither one is listening to the other. Payne will not give up Zoey, and she does not see anything wrong with it. She sees no comparison between what her mother did to her, and what she's doing with Zoey." 

"I think it's time for our boss to take a road trip, a really long road trip." 

"I hear Sweden's really nice at this time of the year." 

"Could you pick someplace a little bit warmer?" 

"I could, but Sweden is where the Vanadium is, and our boss needs 20 pounds of it, within 4 weeks." 

"I used to know some people, who knew some people, who knew some people, but we are all dead now." 

"You were not dead last night dear." 

"I thought I felt something." 

"Do we put him in a hyperbaric chamber, or deep immersion?" 

"Fiona, if he wakes up in deep immersion, he'll go loony. He has to be able to see where he is, and have friendly faces around him. I'll have George grab Jason from the golf course. We will take the big bird; we can get a hyperbaric chamber in there. We will depart in 4 hours. Call Payne in two and half, and tell her this is a high profile mission. He's going, you're going, Suzette, from diplomatic resources, me, and a few other people you can think up are going. I'll take care of the medical stuff, and the agents." 

"Bob, what was the name of that big psychiatrist from Boston, who gave a speech last night at the Hilton. Offer him $20,000 a day and a trip to Sweden to take care of a special patient." 

"Oh I know who it is; Doctor William Russell, I'll call the hotel to see if he is still there." 

"Tell him if he doesn't have any warm clothing, we will buy it for him." 

"He's rich and famous, and for what were paying him, he can buy his own clothes." 

"You make it sound like it's your money." 

"It is our money, isn't it?" 

"No, it's Even Luck's money." 

"Okay, we can buy him a jacket." 

"My mother spends more of our money than we do." 

"How can an 85-year-old woman shop like she does? I will never understand it. I'm going to have to give her a four-bedroom apartment just for her clothes." 

"We can always give her our loft and move into her apartment." 

"Over my dead body. We had enough room for our family in the loft. We raised 2 children in there She doesn't have enough room for herself, and her things, in a three-bedroom apartment. It's not humanly possible." 

"You must remember Bob; she has her gentleman friend over every now and again." 

"Please don't remind me, my head spins just at the thought of it." 

"Why, we are not going to have sex, when we are 85?" 

"My dear, when you are 85, I will be 94, and probably in a little urn on the mantle." 

"Don't say that Mister Short, or you will piss me off. You know what happens when you piss me off. Get to work I meet you at the airport." 

"Just remember, you have to put the mats away after you lose." 

"I tripped." 

"That's what they all say." 

***************** 

"Tom." 

"Yes Mister Short." 

"Give these to Mister Schneider when he wakes up. Tell him they are Zofran. They will settle his stomach. Doctor Tebow wants to see him in his office now. He wants to make sure he did not throw up blood, or rupture any blood vessels in his throat. Stall him for about 30 seconds, asking if he needs his wallet or his glasses or anything else. Then catch him as he begins to fall. Take four men with you, and bring him to the 767. Do you have your passport with you?" 

"It's in my locker downstairs sir." 

"Make sure everyone you pick has theirs. Bring your full arsenal, automatic weapons, and full protective gear, anything you can think of Tom. Everything else will be taken care of on the fly." 

"Are we expecting trouble sir?" 

"Smuggling 20 pounds of a restricted product out of the host country could be a little hairy. We will try to do it legally. We will try to pay off the appropriate people. Then we may have to do it a different way." 

"Interesting options sir." 

"Yes, but at least there are options. Let's get the ball rolling." 

"Yes sir." 

Dycke woke up on his office floor, with a pillow underneath his head, and covered by a blanket. The door to his office was closed, and a guard was posted outside it. Inwardly he smiled. Cheryl made sure no one was getting to him, while he slept. 

He grabbed his chair, and the rollers made a noise. 

The guard turned, opened the door, and rushed to assist him. 

"Mister Schneider, please do not try to move. I will be right back." 

Tom was back in an instant. 

"Mister Schneider, we called Doctor Tebow, and he wants you at his office as soon as we can get you there. These are Zofran. The pharmacy rushed these over for you. They will settle your stomach if you had any bleeding inside. He also wants to check if you burst any blood vessels in your throat. This is lukewarm water. Please drink it slowly." 

Listening to Tom's slow measured tones, Dycke was at ease when he swallowed the 2 pills, with the warm water. 

"Do you need your wallet, keys, or anything else to take with you sir?" 

"My jacket is behind the door Tom." 

"Considering the circumstances sir, I think we can forgo the jacket for this morning." 

"Okay Tom, Cheryl close up, I'll be going..." 

Tom caught him on his way down to the floor. "I thought Mister Short said 30 seconds?" 

"As weak as he is Tom, I'm amazed it took that long." 

Cheryl walked into Dycke's office, and put all of Dycke's traveling necessities into his messenger bag. She followed him out of his office, while he was in Tom's arms. When he was safely on the gurney, she put the pillow under his head, covered him with the blanket, and put the messenger bag by his feet. 

She grabbed Tom's jacket by the lapels. "If anything happens to him while you are in charge of his safety, your life is not worth a plug nickel." 

"If he gets hurt while we are away, I guarantee you I will be dead Cheryl." 

"Don't be dead; I want you both back here safely." 

Tom pushed Dick through the executive offices, and into the elevator. They went down to the basement, and out the rear exit. Four men pushed Dycke into the big transport, hopped in after him, closed the back doors, and headed to the airport. 

********************** 

Fiona was on the phone with a friend at the State Department trying to smooth the way for the purchase of the Vanadium. One question kept popping up, "Why such a large amount of this low radioactive substance in one purchase." 

Fiona replied, "It's a proprietary purchase for Doctor Even Luck. He assures me that the total amount of this purchase will leave the planet on 25 December. It is for a new invention. He will not allow anyone to know what it is at this time, until it is patented. He will give us all the information we need, when we have the product in hand. 

We will be building it, on our site, at the Charleston, South Carolina plant. We will fly the finished product, by via circuitous route, over water, until we reach Texas and land at Austin. 

At that time, all lanes of the interstate will be blocked front and rear, by the Texas Rangers. Our trucks will be moving at highway speed, until they get off the highway at Temple. The trucks will go directly to the spacecraft, where this new invention will be put on board the spacecraft immediately, and secured. Doctor Luck will give you more information on this new invention, after the patent is filed." 

"Fiona, I will try to get this approved, but it will take time." 

"Time is a luxury I don't have Judy. The spacecraft takes off on December 25. That is not negotiable. At this moment, we have a 7-week window. They have the design. We have to come up with a prototype. If the first prototype doesn't work, we have to design, and build another one. If that one works then we have to build a minimum of 6, and make parts for 10 more. We are going to be working 24/7, with the best people we have. 

We have canceled all Christmas vacations. Our senior engineers, technicians, designers, draftsmen, and tool and die maker's, are screaming bloody murder. They don't know what they're going to be working on, no one does. I don't know. The only thing that's keeping everyone in line are two words 'EVEN LUCK!' If he is doing something last minute, and he is begging Dycke to get it done, this thing is huge. This is going to be water cooler conversation for generations. Please Judy get me these permits." 

"Okay Fiona, I'll call in everything I have. I'll twist every arm I can, but I can't promise you anything on such short notice." 

"Thank you Judy that is all I can ask." 

***************** 

She looked at the clock, and it stared back at her. It was 2:45 PM, and she couldn't stall it any longer 

"Okay girl, put on your happy face, smile inside, and lie like a bitch." 

"Hello." 

"Is this the normal Zoey Schneider your dad is talking about?" 

"Tell me who you are and I'll tell you who I am?" 

"I used to beat your dad up regularly when he was a kid." 

"Marty?" 

"No, the pretty one." 

"Fiona, how are you?" 

"I'm still recovering from a few of the barbs you gave me, the last time I saw you." 

"I'm so sorry. I did a lot of terrible things I'm sorry for, but I am different now. Do you want to know what did it?" 

"Your father hit you over the head with a bowling pin, and scrambled your brains like eggs." 

"I know I deserved it, but my dad never touched me. Doctor Luck told him to put me on birth control pills, and I was a changed person within a few days." 

"Zoie, I want to hear more about this, but I can't do it now. May I speak to your mother please?" 

"Sure, let me get her." 

******************** 

"Hello Fiona, what's going on?" 

"Hello Payne, Dycke, and I are leading a whole team of specialists to Sweden. We will be gone for 7 to 9 days, possibly more. We have to convince the Swedish government to allow us to take 20 pounds of Vanadium out of their country without appropriate U.S. permits. If they say okay, then we have to get a company to sell it to us, without those permits. 

I just got off the phone with the State Department, and my friend said she would try to get it done, but she wasn't hopeful. 

There are people in Uppsala who may be willing to look the other way for the right amount of money, and Doctor Luck has given us an open checkbook. 

Dycke is running around getting things organized, otherwise he would have called you himself. We are taking 3 each of our best engineers and scientists with us to make sure we don't get stiffed with low-grade ore. I would not know what Vanadium looks like, from beach sand, if they showed it to me. 

Sweden is 10 hours ahead of us, so this is going to be a bitch of the trip. We will see you when we get back. Take care, Payne." 

"Stay well Fiona; tell Dycke I love him." 

"I have to run. Goodbye." Fiona purposely did not respond to the part of the conversation where Payne said, 'Tell Dycke I Love Him.' She did not think it was appropriate." 

As she was telling her assistants, what the priorities were for the next week, Fiona cell phone rang. She knew it was Bob, because of the ring. 

"What's up Shorty?" 

"You know I'm going to bite your clit, because of that remark." 

"Do you want me to say it again?" 

"No, I know my way around there very well." 

"You called?" 

"Yes, Doctor Russell will meet us at the aircraft. He will be honored to take $20,000 a day, plus a very warm coat to treat a patient." 

"Did you tell him who is patient is?" 

"When I told him it was $20,000 a day, he didn't ask." 

"Did you tell him to show up at the Schneider Industries terminal?" 

"How else would he know where to meet us? Oh shit, I am getting old." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 30



"Do you think those rats at Lefortovo might still know you?" 

"Their great, great, great grandchildren might remember me. Rats are like elephants, they have very long memories." 

*********************** 

The maintenance crews removed 6 rows of seats, from the center section of the Boeing 767. They moved the hyperbaric chamber into position, and secured it with bolts into the floor. The technicians came next, and set up all the oxygen equipment, pressure hoses, and gauges needed to keep the machine running properly. Dycke was going to have more oxygen pumped into his system then he had breathe, since the day Payne told him she was keeping Zoey at home, with her. 

Since that day, he drove himself maniacally into his work. He said very few words, if any to Payne, because she didn't listen to him. He had constant headaches, and he was not allowed to speak to Zoey without Payne standing by her side. 

Payne was always at her side, and this was driving him crazy. It was as if he was no longer Zoey's father. He was a disease in his own home, He decided to leave the house before they got up in the morning, and go straight to bed when he returned. He expected Payne not to talk to him, but so he never made an attempt either. This broke his heart, and his spirit. 

Today's call from his friend shattered the glass that kept the two hemispheres of his brain from colliding. His home life, and business life coalesced, and he collapsed. 

His friends at work were true to him. They sprung into action to save him from himself. They were not going to allow him to self-destruct if they had anything to say or do about it. And as far as they were concerned, they were going to have a lot to say about it. They had been with him, as friends and employees for more than 20 years. His friendship was more important to them, then the paychecks they received from his company. They wanted him healthy again, and they were willing to do anything to get him back to the man he was before this incident began. 

Fiona called both sets of parents, and they were horrified by Payne's actions. Payne did not tell them the wedding had been called off. She did not tell them Zoey was staying at home with her. 

Dycke was not at home when the parental barrage began, and that was Payne's prime defensive move. 

"Did that bastard husband of mine call you and tell you to attack me? When I was a child, I was the perfect child. I never caused one problem for anyone. I was disfigured at birth, and I never complained. If I cried I cried alone, but I never complained. Dycke fell in love with me the way I was. He didn't care about the way I looked. 

Zoey is a different case entirely. She was a bitch every single day of her life. It took every bit of restraint for me not to kill her, or put her in a juvenile facility for wayward girls. 

All of a sudden, she turns into this marvelous child, and you want me to give her away. I won't do it. I will not do it. I can't do it. If you want to divorce me from your lives, so be it. I finally have a daughter I can love, and only God will take her away from me." 

Her mother and father stood up, and prepared to leave. 

Alletta said to her daughter, "Be careful what you wish for Payne, you just might get it." 

"You did it to me mother, how does it feel?" 

"It didn't feel good Payne, but finally, I came to my senses and did what was right for both you and Dycke. Are you doing the same, or are you doing only what's right for you?" 

Chad Schneider asked, "How are you and my son getting on?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"Are you still sleeping in the same bed?" 

"I don't believe that's any of your concern." 

"He is my son, and when it comes to my son, he is my concern. He is no longer sleeping with his wife, one of the few people in this world he would die for. 

I believe it's in his best interest to move to our home, where we can keep an eye on his mental status. What is going on in this house is a war. What you have done goes directly against everything he stands for. You are hiding this from everyone you know and love, because you have not advised any of them that your daughters marriage is canceled. Inside you are ashamed of yourself, because of what you're doing. You are too hardheaded to admit it. If you continue down this road, your life is over. You will have lost your friends and family. You can buy new friends, because of the amount of money you will get from the divorce settlement. Those type friends you can buy anytime, and anywhere. Do you really want those people around Zoey? 

You said it before Payne; you were the perfect child. You were the perfect bride, and up until now you with the perfect wife, and mother. If I were you, I would spend a lot of time in church, praying for advice from someone who is greater than all of us. 

"As to your question, 'Did that bastard husband of mine call us, and ask us to attack you?' The answer is no. I have not talked to my son in nearly 3 weeks. I heard about this at the golf course from your son Jason. Does that make him a bastard, or do you know where he comes from?" 

As Payne was turning fire engine red at Chad's remark, Bacillica said, "It's okay Payne, you don't have to tell us where to go, and how to get there; we know our way out." 

******************* 

"You lied to me mom. You said you and dad were having troubles, but they did not concern me. All of the trouble that is happening here, is because of me?" 

"No it's not Zoey. It's because I don't want to let you go, and everyone else believes I am making the wrong decision. I had 2 boys that grew up to be normal healthy boys. I had one beautiful baby girl and she had a disorder nobody could diagnose until her 16th year. Then my baby girl blossomed. Now she is 17, and they want me to give her up forever. It's not fair, it's just not fair." 

"I don't remember reading anywhere it saying life was fair. Was it fair for you to go through 17 years of your life being disfigured? Is it fair giraffes can't talk? Is it fair that Donald Trump's hair doesn't move?" 

"That's enough Zoey, the Donald Trump remark was not necessary." 

"I was just trying to lighten the mood mom." 

"You did, thank you very much." 

"Do you want to go to the card store and have them print up notes saying the wedding has been canceled? It is the proper thing to do." 

"Yes, and we have to put a rush on it. I've waited much too long to do it." 

"I'm driving, so that means two cars." 

"Who's with you today, I'll say a prayer for him." 

"That's not a nice thing to say mom. I am a very good driver. I have no tickets, no accidents, and I am an 'A' student. Now all I have to do is learn how to drive in a straight line." 

"Maybe you need glasses?" 

"I just had my eyes checked mother. I am 20/10 in both eyes." 

"My goodness, just like your father." 

************************ 

Zoey's SUV was leading the parade up the Savannah Highway towards downtown Charleston. They crossed the Ashley River and turned onto Bee Street traveling north at 30 miles an hour. She was lucky enough to make the traffic light at Ashley Street and made the left turn traveling west. The traffic light at Rutledge turned green, and the car in front of her moved across. She had her turn signal on, waited for the traffic on the opposite side to pass. She began her turn, but out of the corner of her eye, she saw a white panel truck careening down Rutledge at a high rate of speed. She made an instant decision. She turned her wheel hard to the left and hit the accelerator spinning the wheels of the SUV, which headed her in the opposite direction, back onto Ashley. It was an almost, but not enough. The white panel truck crushed the back of the SUV as it attempted its escape. The airbags deployed, and Zoey and Steve were temporarily in shock, and immobilized. 

The 4 men in the panel truck jumped out, and tried to escape. They were carrying automatic weapons, and bags of money stolen from the back of an armored car. They were looking over the shoulders for the police, when they ran into a fusillade of bullets from the agents who were trailing Zoey. They robbers fell to the floor, dead, or dying. 

The police arrived seconds later to take control of the situation. 

The agents put their guns on the ground, and held their hands in the air, with their identifications displayed in them. 

Payne didn't care about any of the shooting going on; all she cared about was Zoey. She was not allowed out of her car, until the police had everything under control. When they said she was allowed to go to her daughter's aid, 3 agents led the way. 

Zoey was outside her car, looking at the damage. 

Her agent was standing by her side telling her that she made the correct move, at the perfect moment. If she made any other choice, they would be dead. 

He didn't leave it at that, he explained each of her other options, and told her why they were lethal. When he was finished, she was very proud of herself, but she was also sick to her stomach. 

Steve took her behind the SUV where she gave up part of her breakfast. He said, "You have nothing to be ashamed of Zoey. That's all the adrenaline that built up in your system. It needs a way to get out, and it's the way it does it. It's perfectly normal, and we all do it the first few times we go through an episode like this. I want to thank you for saving my life." 

Zoey turned around and hugged him. 

"When my mother gets here she's going to yell at me for not doing something better. She will probably stop me from driving until I'm 90." 

"I will back you up Zoey. You did marvelous work just now." 

Through the tangle of men, Payne pushed her way through. 

"Zoey are you okay?" 

"All 10 fingers and all 10 toes mom." 

"Don't you be snippy with me young miss; are you okay?" 

Steve said, "Mrs. Schneider, you should be very proud of your daughter. If she made any other decision, but the one she made, we would both be dead. I just finished proving it to her. She was positively perfect in her decision-making. I'll drive with her anytime, even though she doesn't drive in a straight line." 

"You had to say that, didn't you?" 

"I said your decision-making was perfect, not your driving." 

A policeman walked over, and asked who was driving the SUV. 

Proudly Zoey raised her hand. 

"May I have your drivers license and registration please?" 

Zoie handed him her drivers license, and Steve retrieved the registration from the glove box. 

The policeman winked at Steve. 

"Miss Schneider, I'm going to have to give you 2 tickets." 

Payne and Zoey screamed in tandem, "What?" 

"Yes ma'am, you were going the wrong way down a one-way street, and tearing up city property. We can't have everyone going around spinning their wheels, and tearing up the streets of our fair city, without being punished. Your license will be suspended for 90 days, and the fine will be $750." 

Payne stepped forward. "Officer Scalia, our lawyers are going to take your badge away. My daughter attempted to get away from a speeding van in an attempt to save her life and the life of a man dedicated to protect her. If our men had not interceded, those robbers would've gotten away with all that money, and possibly killed other civilians. They also may have killed my child, and her agent." 

"Madam, are you threatening a police officer?" 

"You bet your ass I am." 

"Would you put your hands against the car and spread your legs 18 inches apart please." 

"May I ask why?" 

"You just threatened a police officer." 

"Verbally, you asshole." 

"There is another ticket, using offensive language in public. I must admit I love my job." 

Steve said, "I don't think you should use your paper forms. You don't have enough of them." 

"Why do you say that, this is a new book?" 

"She's married to Dycke Schneider. You would need a forest of books to make a dent in their monies interest." 

"Mrs. Schneider, your husband gave $22 million to our unions widows and orphans fund last year, and he demanded it be kept anonymous. All South Carolina's orphaned kids go to college, and our widows are not forced from their homes, because of lack of money. We are not allowed to tell them who paid for it, because your husband is a very humble man." 

"As for you young lady, we always know when you're driving. Please don't drive at night; you will be pulled over to take a sobriety test by every police officer that sees you." 

"Steve that's not funny." 

"Steve didn't say a word young woman; we know your license plate number. Your dad gave it to us." 

"Well, it looks like I'm going to get a new one." 

"No, they will put it on the floor, and have a police cruiser run over it a few times, until it straight." 

Zoey looked at Officer Scalia to see if he was lying. He kept a straight face, and continued writing in his little book. Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. 

"You are lying to me aren't you?" 

Without lifting his head, or bothering to stop writing, Scalia said, "Yes." 

"You son of a bitch." 

"There is another ticket; using offensive language in public." 

Three black SUVs drove up alongside them, and Steve said, "Thanks for keeping them occupied Vic. We will leave you alone now." 

"Anytime Steve, I love the looks on their faces." 

Payne looked at him and asked, "You set that all up?" 

"Yes ma'am. All our people who were involved in this will have to go to police headquarters, fill out reports, have their weapons tested, and make an oral statement. That will take a lot of time. If you were standing here waiting to leave, with nothing to do, you would have become very upset with the police for keeping you here for no apparent reason. However, there is a good valid reason, and you would not want to hear it, because it was ruining your day. By keeping you busy for 15 minutes or so, I was able to get replacements here, and now you can continue with your days agenda." 

Payne said, "I hate men, they are sneaky." 

Zoie replied, "What are we?" 

"Devious." 

"It's the same thing." 

"Whose side are you on Zoey?" 

"Mine." 

"Good girl. Is there anything you want to tell me?" 

"No, I just don't want to see any more panel trucks coming my way." 

************************* 

Steve and Zoey were sitting in the back of an SUV. She was not allowed to drive, and she was unhappy about it. 

Steve said, "You just avoided being killed in a major accident. Driving now, you would be looking at every car as a possible accident waiting to happen. You have to wait at least until tomorrow to get your wits about you. Then you can start driving again. I will sit beside you, without worrying, but it will be tomorrow." 

"Okay, I don't have a choice in the matter anyhow, so I'll just wait until tomorrow." 

"Here is the card store, go inside, and get it done quickly." 

"My mother is in the next car. Have you ever heard of her doing anything quickly?" 

"How long is it going to take for your mother to say, 'I'm sorry folks the wedding is off?" 

"Would you like to bet a year's salary on it?" 

"No, but you could be helpful in that situation." 

"You are such an optimist Steve." 

Nearly 3 hours later, the 2 women came out of the store smiling and laughing, carrying 2 packages each. Two agents followed behind them. They were pissed. They were carrying enough shopping bags between them they qualified as pack animals. Several agents rushed to help them, and made sure they were not in the cars the women were in. Language was going to be used that tender ears are not supposed to hear. 

***************** 

Dycke woke up in the hyperbaric chamber, with his son, Jason, looking down at him. He spoke into the microphone. 

"Tell the son of a bitch who put me in here I'm going to kill him." 

"Which son of a bitch would that be dad?" 

"The son of a bitch who thought up the idea to put me in this chamber of horrors." 

Bob Short walked up on the other side of the chamber and said, "That son of a bitch would be me. Fiona wanted to put you into a submersion chamber, but I told her you would come out loony tunes. How do you feel?" 

"My headache is better." 

"That's because of the 3 atmospheres of pressurized 100 percent oxygen your breathing. We want you to go back to sleep for as long as you can, or as usual my darling wife has options for you. You can go back to sleep naturally. You can take the 2 pills that are on the tray above your left hand, or my wife's favorite, we can spray a gas into the chamber instead of oxygen, which will knock you out for at least 8 hours, when we will be landing in Stockholm." 

"Why am I going to Stockholm?" 

"Don't you remember the orders you gave us?" 

"No, would you please enlighten me?" 

"I better get Fiona, because you spoke to her." 

********************** 

"Hi boss, how are you feeling?" 

"I'm feeling better thank you. Why am I going to Stockholm?" 

"You called me, ranting and raving about something called Vanadium. You needed 20 pounds of it, and you needed it yesterday. I looked it up quickly on my computer, and I told you it was impossible, because of the import/export permits, and licenses we would need. You nearly ripped my head off. 

We have most of the senior staff on this aircraft going there with us. Even has given us an open checkbook to get that stuff back to our plant to build, whatever he told you he wants built. You never told me what it was. You yelled at me to get my ass in gear, and we were leaving at 4 o'clock this afternoon. I was going to come down to your office, and kick your ass myself, but I had things to do, so I sent Bob to do it for me. 

By the time he got there, you were in the bathroom throwing up. Cheryl told Bob what was going on at home, and you had not been sleeping. That is why you are in a hyperbaric chamber. It helps get rid of the toxins in your body. It fights bacteria, stimulates stem cell growth. It promotes healing, reduces headaches, and relieves chronic fatigue syndrome. Since you have been exhibiting all of these factors lately, plus a dozen others that are on the list, you are not coming out of there, until we reach our destination. 

We have a world famous psychiatrist on board, and you are going to talk to him. Did you hear what I said Dycke, you are going to talk to him, or Bob is going to beat the shit out of you. He's looking forward to you saying no. You are his boss, and he hasn't hit you in a very long time. These are extenuating circumstances, so he feels hitting you would do you some good. He knows it would do him some good, because you're turning into a pussy. 

I would hit you myself, because I could get away with it. However, I don't want to break a nail." 

"While we were in Sweden, you are not going to do anything, unless you are told to do it. You will sit in the hotel, and talk with Doctor Russell. We know what your problem at home is, and we all empathize with you. We know you will not strike Payne in anger, so while we are here we are going to try to figure out a way to hurt her, without violence." 

"The first thing we have to do is get you well. We have all decided that we will use anything and everything in our power to do it. We want it to work, regardless how brutal it becomes. You can fire all of us or some of us when we get back, and we don't care. Our jobs are not as important as your health is to us. We want you healthy for a very long time." 

"When we finish our business in Sweden, you are going back in the hyperbaric chamber, and you are going back to sleep all the way home. As Bob told you, there are 3 options, which one have you chosen for your trip there?" 

"Is there water for the pills?" 

"Reach your right hand up, there is a tube there. Drink at least 6 ounces of water, because pure oxygen dries out your system." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 30



Dycke drank the cool water, and then he raised the tube. With his left hand, he reached for the 2 pills. They were not there. He looked at Fiona, and shook his head. 

"What did you do to me this time?" 

"Boss, you are too trusting." 

"I beginning to think you are smarter than I am Fiona 

"Boss, I'm not smarter than you are. I'm just more devious than you are. All you have to do now is heal. We are your friends. We will take care of most of your business problems while we are in Sweden. Hopefully, we can work something out with the Swedish government, and your family life." 

"Stay out of it Fiona, it's a lost cause." 

"Someone said to you long time ago, "It ain't over until the fat lady sings. We haven't heard any singing yet Dycke, and until we do, we are not going to stop trying to help you, just like you have helped us all these years." 

"Good night Fiona." 

"Good night Dycke." 

***************** 

I hung up the phone, and everyone around the table looked at me as if I had 3 heads. I said, "What?" 

"What did you do to that poor man this time dad?" 

It seemed I couldn't do a good deed for my friend and get away with out being blamed for doing something awful to him. I rallied to my own defense. 

"I will have you all know I did Dycke a very large favor. Since the incident between Zoey and Gordon, Payne and he have not been talking. He is extremely upset with her. She will not listen to anyone's point of view but her own. He arrives at work early, leaves work late, and is driving himself to the point of exhaustion. 

When he hears my voice, he laughs, because he can curse back at me. He can't do that with his other customers. I am a relief valve for him. So when I heard him today, and I heard him snap, I called a friend of his. He has many of them. Fiona and Bob Short have been with him, since he was in high school. 

Many of his senior analysts, engineers, and technicians have been with him for 20 years or more. His son Jason is with him now also; so he is in good hands." 

"As usual dad, that was an excellent story, but you didn't answer my question. What are they doing to Dycke now?" 

"They're taking him to Sweden to get our Vanadium." 

"I thought you said it could take up to 4 weeks to get the governmental permits, and licenses to move Vanadium between our 2 countries." 

"Yes that's exactly what I said, and exactly what I told Dycke." 

"Why is he going there now?" 

"Baby, you would have to ask his friends that question, because I don't know." 

"Daddy, you are a lying sack of ping-pong balls." 

"Good mommy, say nice words." 

"Mommy felt the wind from the door opening. I knew it was you coming in, and I didn't want daddy to hit me." 

"Now if there are no more questions for me, I'd like to get ready to go home." 

"Are you anxious to see if there's a gun on the table dad?" 

"If there is, it's as much your mother's fault as it is mine." 

"Yes, but you were the one that's going to be dead." 

"That could be problematic, but let's wait until we get home to see if I can fix it." 

**************** 

"No Creamy Cow?" 

"No Creamy Cow tonight baby, we are having pizza for dinner." 

"You have pizza, I have Creamy Cow?" 

"No, you can have messy ghetti if you want." 

"Messy Ghetti and cold lemon?" 

"Okay, spaghetti, and lemon ice." 

"Not good like banilla ice cream, chocolate syrup, but okay." 

"I'm happy that you approve." 

"No approve, accept." 

"Teddy, you are too smart." 

"Got you, I know." 

"Love my too smart Teddy." 

"Love my mommy." 

"Got you, I know." 

"I know my mommy know." 

"You are not trapping me into that again, for all the tea in China." 

"Laugh lots last time." 

"Newton thought we went crazy." 

"He laughed too." 

"Excuse me do you remember who I am?" 

"Yes, you Joseph, friend of grandpa. You say funny words about me when you come in." 

"My full name is Doctor Joseph Oyster. When you and grandpa leave go look at the stars, I am going to replace him here, and help build spaceship number 2." 

"You not last long. Government claim conflict. Want you back. Tell grandma now." 

"Did you hear that Even?" 

"Yes I did, and I can't see where the conflict lies. Why should Joseph tell grandma, Teddy?" 

"Important she know." 

"Isn't it more important to have Mister Laver know about this?" 

"He want raise." 

"You are too funny my granddaughter. You know my friend too well. I have a big surprise in store for my friend before we leave. I have a big surprise in store for you when we leave." 

"Bring ice cream?" 

"No bring ice cream." 

"Mean grandpa." 

"Grandpa very sorry, no room. Dinner time, messy ghetti, lemon ice, and no food fights with Newton." 

"Gordon?" 

"No, Gordon is coming home with me." 

"Not fair." 

Gordon said, "I would win, I have bigger hands." 

Teddy replied, "Bigger mouth." 

Gordon rushed her, and began tickling her. 

"I have a bigger mouth, do I?" 

"Eat much, no food on plate to fight." 

"I can't argue with that, I'm going home. You beat me again Teddy." 

"I know." 

"On her next birthday cake, let's not put happy birthday, let's put, "I know." 

"You are correct Gordon, she always knows." 

****************** 

146. Estranged Happenings 

Sandra threw herself into his arms and nearly crushed him to death as she kissed him. 

"Baby, I will be no use to you if you break C2 and C-3." 

"I told you Rebecca, all he thinks about is sex." 

"Hello girls, I'm going to buy you earplugs, because your mother and I are going to be very busy." 

"How about us Joseph? Are you going to buy us earplugs also?" 

"Mom, dad, how wonderful to see you. How did you get a tan in Chicago, at this time of year?" 

"Palm Springs sonny, we had a golf tournament there. The sun is out all day, and most of the evening. It's a wonderful place to get a tan." 

"Are your hands okay, or do you need a treatment?" 

"Sam, our poor demented son has forgotten that there are doctor's in Chicago. It's not like being here, in the wilderness, where he has chosen to pay off his student loans, and not let us do it for him. We must have done a good job raising him, because he has ethics, and he stands by them." 

"That's not true dear, he's just obstinate." 

Four women hit Sam in quick order. 

"I don't believe that's fair. My wife hits me all the time and I'm used to it. It's part of my marriage contract. However, being hit by my son's wife and 2 children at the same time is over and above the call of duty." 

"Don't worry about it dad, Sandi is coming with me. Your problem lies with the 2 children you have agreed to keep for the next 7 years of your life; 'If they allow you live that long.' They are both smarter than Sandi and me. Push them, and they will be out of your hair and in college in 3 to 4 years. Send them to a college as far away from you as possible, and you may be able to recover, if you are still alive. The University of San Diego or the University of Miami are good choices." 

"Are you saying I might not live long enough to spend the $210 million they offered me?" 

"You don't have a prayer dad. You can't play that many golf tournaments in 7 years." 

"That's how they convinced me to keep them. Both of them snookered me into teaching them how to play golf." 

"You didn't feel the hook in your mouth when you said yes?" 

"No, I was so happy they wanted to learn, I said yes immediately." 

"Mom, you have to keep dad away from them. They already have his number." 

"Joseph, I knew that when they asked him the question about the elevator, and Otis. They gave him chapter and verse on his history. I was surprised when they didn't give him the current status of the company." 

"They probably knew he had stock in the company. They leave nothing to chance mom." 

Sandra interrupted everyone. "My husband and I are going home. If the 4 of you would go to your hotel, we will meet you at our house tomorrow. We will take you to see the spacecraft." 

"I hate to tell you Sandra, we are not married." 

"Dummy, why do you think your parents and children are here?" 

"What if I say no?" 

"I have already taken care of that scenario. Girls do you want to answer your father's question." 

Joe said, "Please don't, I know it will be painful, both mentally, and physically." 

"Come on dad, it took us an hour to memorize the preamble to the Constitution, and the Constitution of the United States, with all 27 amendments. You would have loved listening to it, from both of us, in duet." 

"An hour, what took you so long?" 

"Mom won't increase the speed on the computer to 6 megabytes. She says it's too expensive." 

"Sandy, I can't tell you how much trouble you are in." 

"I'm sorry, I just can't get used to having money." 

"Dad will you help her with her finances?" 

"I already have Joseph. She assigned everything to your mother and me. She is not going home. She is staying here with you. The children are coming to Chicago with us. They are going to a private school, where they will be tested, retested, and tested again, until it comes out their ears. We will get an accurate measurement of their IQs, and place them in the grades they belong. We are going to push them, just as you suggested. Fun time is over, and the work is about to begin." 

"Grandpa, we are going to lose so many golf balls, you better buy stock in the company." 

"I knew you would threaten me with something like that, so I came up with an option of equal terror. For each golf ball lost, you will add 10 minutes of study time every day. How does that strike your fancy Deborah?" 

"Dad, we may want to go into space with you. Your father is tricky." 

"Why do you think I never took up the game, and became a Doctor?" 

"I thought it was because you were smart?" 

"I was smart, smart enough not to play golf." 

"Doctor Finch, when is my wedding?" 

"I want to invite some of my friends, how does Saturday afternoon sound to you?" 

"Where? 

"At the Hyatt hotel." 

"You'll never get a room at this late date." 

"Do you want to bet your virginity on it?" 

"Joseph, you took it two children ago." 

"2 o'clock, in the main ballroom of the Hyatt Hotel." 

"Joseph, you are out of your mind." 

"Dad buy a tuxedo, mom buy a 'Ballgown', and get the kids something extremely appropriate. You have 4 days to do it. I'll take care of the wedding dress myself." 

"How many people are you inviting?" 

"A little more than 200." 

"You were always crazy Joseph." 

"I was always crazy about you." 

"Take me home and prove it." 

"I can't, I have work to do." 

He didn't duck in time. 

*********************** 

As they were speeding up the interstate, Joseph made a call. 

"Colonel Canyon." 

"Lucius, Joe Finch; Sandra, and I are getting married Saturday thanks to you. I would be honored if you would be my best man." 

"After everything you've done for us, I humbly accept. Thank you Joseph, what time and where?" 

"I will be calling the Hyatt momentarily. I will tell them I want the Grand Ballroom at 2 o'clock for about 200 people or more. I am inviting anyone who wants to come. I'm going to ask Mister Zabo, and Mister Valentino, the entire staff, and any agents that are off-duty to join us. They deserve a good party." 

"Why don't you let me take care of Mister Zabo, Mister Valentino, General Morgan, and the staff? Patti Valentino can run the computer analysis. She can tell us who's off and who is working in a matter of moments. The staff can make the phone calls. We can have a number for you by the end of tomorrow. 

William will call the Hyatt and get you the main ballroom. There isn't anyone alive that will say no to him. Why don't you concentrate on getting an orchestra and the menu set up and taking care of your wife, parents, and children?" 

"How did you know they were in town?" 

"There is nothing that goes on here that I don't know about Joe. If it's important, I report it to the General. This is not important, but I will invite the General to the wedding." 

"You are the 'Man', Lucius. Thank you again for being my best man." 

"Thank you Joe, it is my honor." 

"Lucius, one more thing, 'No Gifts.' Where we are going I don't think anyone will know what to do with pantyhose." 

He didn't duck fast enough this time either. 

"Be nice baby, I may have to tie your hands to something solid and tease you, until you cry." 

"Can I start crying now?" 

"I am going to be able to take care of your needs dear. My best man is going to take care of everything except the orchestra, the menu, and your wedding dress. I think I will call the Hyatt, and tell them what I want in the way of food." 

"Why not let everyone order from the menu." 

"What an excellent idea." 

**************** 

"Hyatt Hotel how may I help you?" 

"May I speak to the manager please? This is Doctor Joseph Finch calling." 

"This is Victor Crestor; I am the manager on duty. How my help you?" 

"Mister Crestor, Saturday at 2 o'clock there is going to be a wedding in the main ballroom for Mister and Mrs. Joseph Finch. There will be more than 200 guests. I need the name of an orchestra, and your Master Chef." 

"I'm sorry Doctor Finch; the main ballroom is booked for Saturday." 

"In the next 15 minutes Mister Crestor, you will receive a phone call from Mister William Zabo, are you familiar with that name?" 

"Yes Doctor, everyone is familiar with Mister Zabo." 

"Mister Zabo is a close personal friend, and he will tell you the same thing I just told you. Whatever you have to do to move the wedding that is scheduled in the main ballroom, I would suggest you start moving it now. You do not wish to upset Mister Zabo in any way. Your job and the job of any other manager that gets in his way are forfeit, if you do." 

"I understand Doctor Finch. As soon as I receive the phone call, I will begin moving the other wedding to a smaller room. Do you want me to book the best orchestra we know?" 

"How large is the orchestra, and what type music are they capable of playing?" 

"It is a 38 piece orchestra, and they can play anything you desire." 

"Very good, book them, and have the orchestra leader call me at home. Now, let me speak to the executive chef." 

He was put on hold for about a minute, and then the chef came on the line. 

"Hello Doctor Finch, this is Maximilian." 

"Hello Maximilian, from the length of time I was on hold I assume you were given instructions about Saturday afternoon." 

"Yes Doctor I was, but now what about the menu?" 

"It is going to be quite simple Maximilian. Each of my guests will order from the main evening menu. I don't want you to run out of anything that's on it. You have 4 days to order every ingredient needed for every dish you have on your menu. I don't want one of my guests to be disappointed when they order something, and a staff member tells them you are out of it. Your job and your reputation will be ruined if you do. I don't care if you have to bring in extra freezers or refrigerators and have them parked in the back of the hotel. If it's on the menu, you had better have it. 

For evening specials, I want added to the menu: Rack of Lamb, Lamb Chops, Veal Shanks, and Veal chops. I want all of them double thickness. I want Atlantic salmon, which are not farm raised, Pacific Sea Bass, Oysters Rockefeller, and huge Maryland blue crab cakes 

I would like a smorgasbord of fruit, cheeses, and the best of everything that you normally would serve at a high-end wedding outside the main ballroom. 

There is an open bar, and I do not want cheap champagne. I would suspect you would know what Mister Zabo would consider a fine champagne. If you wouldn't serve it to him, don't serve it to anyone else. Am I being clear Maximilian?" 

"Yes Doctor." 

"Make sure you have extra staff on duty for that evening. I do not want my guests waiting 30 minutes for their meals to be brought to them, and 30 minutes for the plates to be removed from the table. 

Do you make wedding cakes or should I order it outside?" 

We can make you a wonderful wedding cake, sir." 

"All right, plan on making a cake for 250 people. I will bring my bride in so she can pick out the decorations for it." 

"Yes Doctor Finch, but what you're asking for is going to be exceedingly expensive." 

"Did I ask you anything about money Maximilian?" 

"No Doctor, you didn't." 

"Good, at the end of the evening, you will present my father a bill, which he will promptly pay. Does that meet with your approval?" 

"Yes Doctor, it does." 

"Good, I have just reached my home. I'm going to go inside, and fuck my bride silly. Does that also meet with your approval?" 

"Have a wonderful time Doctor. I will be placing your orders, while you are placing yours." 

"Thank you Maximilian, I hope you are enjoying what you are doing, as much as I will be enjoying what I am doing." 

****************** 

Sandra asked, "Are you going to announce to the world that you were wearing extra-large, pre-lubricated, fluorescent, striped condoms, sent to you by your pre-pubescent daughters from Amazon.com." 

"Well, I might leave the last part out." 

"If my life wouldn't be over without you, I would leave you, because of your smart mouth." 

"My smart mouth is going to be very busy in a few minutes getting reacquainted with several parts of your body. Should I use tape on your mouth, or just stick a pair of socks in there?" 

"Don't use tape; it will leave a mark all around my mouth. However, no dirty socks either, that's gross." 

"Sarah was here yesterday, I only have clean socks." 

"Lucky me, you better give her a large Christmas present. She said you were worse than a slob. She said you could have saved money if you let her come once a week, instead of once every 2 weeks." 

"I didn't run out of clothes until the 2nd week." 

"What are you going to do on the spaceship Joseph? You are only allowed one suitcase." 

"Yes, but you should see the size of my suitcase." 

"They may not let you on-board with it." 

"They have to, they didn't specify a size, and I am also the only Doctor they have going with them." 

"You always find a way to beat the system." 

"I became a Doctor to help people. They charged me $330,000 for that privilege. I was not going to stand for it. I went to a 2nd rate medical school, but I studied my ass off to be the best student in the school. 

I was accepted into Lyndon Baines Johnson Hospital to do my internship, coming out of that school, because I did so well in my interviews and my knowledge of medicine. 

I did so well during my internship, LBJ kept me on to do my specialty in Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, as part of the University of Texas Science Center." 

"You know all this, because you were there at my side pushing me harder and harder every day. You were taking care of 2 kids, and you still had time to fuck me into submission, and push me to do better. 

Then I took you down here, to take care of my student loans. It was only going to be for 5 years. I thought it was going to be an easy gig. Then you were gone, and I didn't know why you left me. I became the worst kind of Doctor possible. I didn't care about my patients, or me. 

Then along came Margaret, and her entourage. If you want to talk about a life-changing moments, those few minutes were mine. When someone sticks a .9-millimeter automatic weapon in your mouth, and you know he's not afraid to use it, you tend to listen very carefully to what's being said. When Colonel Lucius C. Canyon spoke to me, I heard every syllable as clear as a bell. 

From that night on, I've returned to being the Doctor I was, and I started to love medicine again. Lucius and I have been best friends since that day." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 30



"The car stopped about 4 minutes ago Joseph. Can we go inside now?" 

"I'm sorry, I got lost in the story. When we walk in the door, we will make new stories." 

"Thank you Jack, Henry, we appreciate the ride." 

"Thank Doc, it's first time we heard that story." 

"Every word of it is true. We will see you tomorrow, and I will finish it for you." 

"Come with me Sandra, you can pick out the socks." 

*************** 

She walked into the house, and it was dark. The lights were off, but the battery operated candles flickered everywhere she could see. Music was playing softly in the background. 

Joe put her suitcases down by the front door, closed it, and locked it securely. 

His telephone was disconnected, and his cell phone was off. He was not going to be disturbed by anyone today. It was his day off, and it was going to stay that way. 

Sandra walked slowly into the living room, and saw flowers everywhere. Joseph had gone all out to make her welcome. 

As she was looking around, he removed his clothing, and snuck up behind her. He put his arms around her waist, kissed her neck, and nibbled at her ear. 

"You are trying to figure out what's out of place, aren't you?" 

"Yes dear, something is missing, and I can't put my finger on." 

"There are only 4 chairs at the dining room table instead of 6. There is a tablemat covering the table, and a dark brown linen tablecloth on top of it. I promised you I was going to take your virginity on the dining room table, and I was going to take it again, and again, and again. I have never lied to you, and that is something I want you to look forward to for a few days. The evening we come home from our wedding ceremony, your ass is mine." 

"I have missed you so much Joseph, anything you want from me is yours." 

"Dance with me." 

He took her arm, turned her around, and she burst out laughing. 

He stood before her, fully tumescent, naked, and wearing an extra large, pre-lubricated, fluorescent, striped condom. 

"That's not fair Joseph. I told you if you walked around in one of those things, I would be naked and ready." 

"Do you need any help?" 

"The zipper is in the back." 

"I bet I can get you naked less than 7 seconds." 

"Have you been practicing on Sarah?" 

"No, I have an easier way." 

Joe took a surgical knife from the drawer on his right, slipped it inside the collar of her dress, and began sliding down. The knife made quick work of her bra and continued moving swiftly downward. Her panties were gone in half an instant. He finished cutting through the hem of the dress, grabbed it, swung her around, and the only thing she had left on were her shoes. 

Sandra screamed, "I just bought that dress Joseph." 

"Where did you buy it Sandi; Walmart, T.J. Maxx, or some other discount store?" 

"Does it matter where I bought it, if I liked it?" 

"It may not matter to you Sandi, but it does matter to me." 

She fell into his arms again, and held him tight. 

"I will go out with your friends and buy the clothes you want me to wear. I won't bother looking at the price tags or anything else. I will ask your friends what they think of it. Then I will come home, and ask the man I love what he thinks. Now will you make love to me, otherwise it would be a waste of a perfectly lovely florescent condom." 

"Are you sure you don't want me to clean up first?" 

"I'm sure; now stop stalling, and fuck me." 

He didn't take her to the bed. He didn't take her to the couch. He lowered her to the floor, and took possession of her body, mind, and spirit right there in the hall. The only thing he forgot was the socks. Thankfully, the neighbors were still at work. 

Hungrily, he reclaimed what was his, and would soon be his again. He kissed her mouth with such passion; she was going to need ice to take down the swelling. Her neck was so black and blue she would need heavy makeup to cover it. Further down she just smiled. As she touched each mark on her body, she recalled how he put it there, and how wonderful it felt as he did it. 

She looked at the area between her thighs, close to her vagina, and let her fingers stroked over the reddened areas he left there. 

Her body tingled as she stroked the tender flesh, as she remembered how Joseph tortured her by not plunging his tongue, or fingers inside her. 

She begged, oh how she begged him to take her, but he refused. He traveled around the Holy Grail of all men, and never once touched a piece of intimate flesh. She lost count of how many orgasms she had, and how many threatened reprisals she made. Then, in the middle of one of her most desperate pleas, he bit her clit, and she exploded into unconsciousness. She woke up moments later, with a note on her chest. "DON'T MOVE A MUSCLE, OR ELSE!" She was tempted to find out what or else was, but her body was so languid after this orgasm, she decided to stay still. 

Joseph came back moments later, carrying a tray of Mimosa, and cookies with different cheeses on them. 

Before Sandra could say anything he said, "Sarah didn't make these. I made them just now. I cut the cheeses earlier this morning, and put them on the cookies, as you slept." 

"I never doubted it. Can I give you a kiss for such a wonderful orgasm?" 

"Yes you may, but that was only a class 'C' orgasm. Just wait until we get to the big time orgasms. Have you forgotten what those feel like?" 

"It's been so long; I'm ashamed to say yes, I have. The girls haven't been very helpful in that area either. They are at that age, when they want to know, and they will not be put off by one-sentence answers. They want details, very intimate details, plus the mechanics behind them. 

Once I went through an entire scenario with them, only to have Rebecca say to Deborah, "I told you that's the way it was done. Why didn't you believe me?" 

Deborah replied to her innocent looking sister, "Mom's done it that way, and you haven't." 

"They set you up so innocently Joseph, and then they let you freefall into thin air. They are so wonderful; I want to kill them both." 

She took a sip of her drink, and winced. "You made this Mimosa a little strong. A few more like this and I will be useless to you." 

"I'm a Doctor, not a bartender. I cannot imagine what they're going to do to my parents over the next 7 years." 

"They are going to be wonderful. Your father has their number, and they love your parents very much." 

"My father will go crazy, when the start taking golf lessons and they are very good at it." 

"What aren't our girls good at Joseph?" 

"Finish your drink; I have to bring you up to the class 'B' orgasm." 

"Can I use the restroom first? You can get the socks while I'm in there." 

"Alright, but be quick about it." 

********************** 

When Sandra came out of the bathroom, Joseph's demeanor was changed. 

"What's the matter Joe?" 

"Julia Atwater died at Atwater estate in Connecticut. A few hours later, President Clark Atwater died of a massive heart attack, while he was grieving over her body. The reading of their Will's will take place before their bodies are moved to Washington. I hope it doesn't affect any of the people here that were going to attend our wedding." 

"We could always move the wedding to Sunday." 

"I don't think so. Everyone has been inconvenienced as much as we dare to do. We will just hope for the best, and muddle through." 

"Did you expect to be invited?" 

"No, however, Mister Zabo, and Jemma, Mister Valentino and Patti, the Chief Justice, and Sandra, the governor elect of Maryland, her sisters, and the boy who always tags along with them." 

"That boy is Robert Valentino." 

"I didn't know that." 

"He is the chief political strategist for the new governor, and he is Patti's son." 

"Do you find it amazing how much power, brilliance, and money, stays within a very narrow circle of people?" 

"Actually, I don't. It's breeding. If a Carnegie married a Mellon, you would expect their children to be brilliant." 

"I married you and look what we got." 

"Yes, look what we got. Two brilliant standup comedians, who deserve to be killed, and cuddled every minute of every day." 

"When you figure out how to do that would you let me know?" 

"I'll think about it, while you are recovering from your next orgasm. Turnover, and get up on your knees." 

"The floor is hard Joseph; my knees are going to kill me." 

"Why not ask me if I care." 

"No, because you will spank me." 

"I see you remembered one part of my pleasures." 

"It may have been pleasurable to you, and it made me pay attention to what you wanted from me, but it sure stung my ass." 

"What did I always tell you about your ass, Sandi?" 

"You always said it was the prettiest one you had ever seen. However, since mine is the only one you have ever seen, that was not a very rousing complement." 

"You are forgetting dear all of those vain women, who want their bottoms made smaller, and tighter, in order to make them look years younger. I also see the accident victims, and others that I must fix up before they are sent home. I must have seen at least 6 or 7 other rear ends beside yours. Now get on your knees, before I spank you for no reason at all." 

"When you are finished with me Joseph, I am going to spank you for no reason at all." 

"You are assuming you're going to have strength left when this is over." 

Sandra turned over onto her knees and raised her ass into the air. 

Joseph positioned himself behind her, looked into her eyes as she peered over her shoulder, and without any warning was as deep inside her as he could possibly be. 

Sandi screamed, "You fuck." 

Show replied, "Socks." 

She reached out for 2 things, a pillow, and a pair of tennis socks. 

Joseph was pounding into her, as she was attempting to put the socks into her mouth. He raised up on one knee and continued pounding inside her as if this was going to be the last time they were going to see each other. 

Sandi managed to get a good bite onto the socks, but very little was inside her mouth. 

Joe slowed what she was doing grabbed her long hair, which forced her mouth to open. He grabbed the socks; push them deep inside her mouth. He resumed forcefully fucking her from behind. Even though her words were garbled, Joe could understand every word she said and none of them was complementary. 

He knew she was paying attention, when the words stopped, and her hips were forcing themselves back at him. It was time to change. He grabbed her thighs, and without missing a beat, he stood up and continued pushing himself deep inside her. 

He pushed her legs together, bent his back over hers. He grabbed her knees, brought them up to her chest, and with all his strength lifted her up, until it her back was against his chest. 

If it weren't for the socks, they would have heard her in Austin. Her arms were flailing, her legs formed the letter 'N', and Joseph had not slowed down fucking her. He turned and walked towards the wall so she could hold on to it. 

Sandi rested her head, breasts, and arms against that wall as if her life depended on it. What she didn't realize was it brought him closer to the little table where he got his surgical knife. He opened the top drawer and removed a 4-inch long, 1/2 inch diameter flexible prelubricated butt plug. 

His left hand insinuated its way between her thighs and began playing between her lips, and around her clitoris. 

Sandi moaned as she felt his finger enter her along with his penis. When he pulled out, his finger came out, and when he moved in the finger moved in deeper, and deeper, until it reached that spot that drove her wild. He focused his nail on it, and it rode along with his penis every time he moved in and out. When he slowed down, she bit down on the socks in anger. However, when he sped up, and his nail caused havoc along the rough spot, on the top of her vagina. She could feel her orgasm building. He was moving fast, and his nail was doing its work, overloading her senses when she felt something different happening. Something was trying to get into her ass, and she closed it tight. 

Joseph almost stopped moving, and his finger was nearly outside her body. When he began moving in, it was less than an inch, before he started moving back out. 

She screamed, "No', through the socks in her mouth." 

However, the torture continued as he moved slowly, and less than an inch into her. 

After several minutes, he resumed fucking her hard, with the finger assisting him. He could hear Sandi screaming, "Thank you, thank you; this is what I need, through the socks, as his finger played with her G spot." 

He moved the miniature butt plug into position, but this time, he did not give her warning. He used his fingers as his guide, and when he was ready, he pushed it all the way in. He moved his knee over to make sure it stayed in place, and listened carefully to the stream of invective's coming out of his wife's mouth. After a moment, it got out of hand. He put her on her own two feet, and he warned her to calm down. 

Sandi said, "Shove it up your ass." 

Joseph understood it, but wanted to play the game with her. He pulled the socks out of her mouth, and said, "Would you please say that to me again." 

Sandra did not like the tone of his voice, or the look in his eyes. She knew she would be in trouble if she repeated it so she said, "What I said was under duress, please forgive me." 

"The object that's up your behind, is it hurting you?" 

"No." 

"Then what were you screaming about?" 

"The thought of it going up my behind." 

"I'm getting you ready for your wedding night. Do you think I'm bigger than the object that's up your ass right now?" 

"Yes I believe you're at least 8 or 9 times bigger than the object that's up my rear end." 

"I am not that much bigger, but it's close. Place your face against the wall, and toe to heal take 4 steps back. Bend at the waist and see if your head touches the wall. Good, reach down and grab your ankles. Now don't move if you get dizzy lean forward the wall will catch you." 

Without telling her, he pulled the butt plug out of her bottom. He placed it on a cloth napkin on the floor where she could see it. He reached into the drawer, pulled out a one-inch diameter flexible butt plug, and put it aside. He took out a rigid butt plug that was tapered like a bullet, until it reached its maximum of 3 inches in diameter, and 8 inches long. 

He took the one half inch, and one-inch butt plugs, and he bent down to show her the difference between the two. 

He said, "This will be the end of your training for today. This is one half inch bigger than the one I put up you earlier. You should barely feel the difference just relax your stomach muscles, and it will be over in a few minutes. Are you feeling all right Sandi?" 

"Yes, I thought you were angry with me Joseph, and you were going to spank me. I'm very happy you didn't." 

"Dearest, we've been apart too long, and there are certain things we are going to have to get used to again. When we are, I will gladly spank that beautiful bottom of yours." 

"Good, that means I can bite yours." 

"Yes, I remember how much fun that was. Relax and this will be over very soon." 

He returned to the table, put the small butt plugs down, and picked up the large 3-inch diameter butt plug. He lubricated with an anesthetic lubricant, passed it over a candle flame to warm it, and knelt down behind Sandi. He patted her lightly on her hip and told her to release her ankles, but to maintain her position. 

"Tell me when you're ready baby; you will not feel a thing." 

"Go ahead Joseph, I am ready." 

"Breathed evenly and here I go." 

The small warm lubricated tip entered her anus, and with one slow continuous move. He was inside her, without any complaint. He kept moving it deeper and deeper until 6 inches inside her. 

"How are you Sandi?" 

"I'm fine; it just felt a little longer than I thought it would be." 

He began moving it in and out of her, and heard her moan as he did. 

"If it feels good baby, you can move with it." 

"It feels wonderful Joseph, I'm amazed. May I spread my legs; I think I'm getting ready to cum." 

"Do what your body is telling you to do, and tell me what you want me to do. I want you to feel wonderful." 

Sandi spread her legs, bent her knees, and put her hands on the wall to give her balance. 

"Move it faster, and harder please, I can feel my ovaries tightening up. Please Joseph, help me cum." 

He was tempted to help her by playing with her clit, but he wanted it to be a complete anal orgasm. He moved it up and down, side to side, faster and faster. 

Sandi started screaming, "Yes, yes, that's it, that's it. Joseph, push it all the way in, and fuck me. It will come out, but push it all the way in please, and fuck me to death." 

This was an offer he could not refuse. He pushed the remaining 2 inches inside her, and watched as her sphincter closed. 

"Oh God that feels good. Fuck me Joseph; fuck me hard." 

He pulled her away from the wall, and put her on her back. He brought her knees up to her chest, and entered her like a runaway freight train. 

"I can feel you both Joseph, I can feel both of you. It's so wonderful; it makes me tighter for you. It makes me feel like a virgin again. Can you feel it my love, can you feel how tight I am?" 

"Yes I can. Use your muscles and trap inside you. Don't let me move." 

Sandi concentrated on tightening her pelvic muscles. Within seconds, Joe screamed, "Sandi, I didn't ask you to cut it off, just to put pressure on it." 

"I haven't done that in a long time Joe. It's like your mimosa; it was just a little strong." 

"That's better, get ready for your 'B' orgasm." 

He began moving circularly, while his left hand went to her clit and squeezed it tight. 

She started to scream, but his mouth covered hers with a passionate kiss. She released her legs, and tied them behind his upper back. She grabbed his head to keep his mouth on hers, but he was able to move to her ears, jaw, and throat, with great ease. When he got to her breasts, she lost her ability to fight. He knew her body so well; he played it like a perfectly tuned piano. He played with her nipple, until it was distended, and then nursed on it. 

Sandy's mind was flying, as Joseph's mouth moved to the other breast, and his hand, kept the nipple he had been nursing on sensitized. 

Joe nursed on her breast lovingly, as he continued making love to her. He knew all her signs, and when her belly went flat, her hips were turned to the sky, her mouth was open, and her eyes were closed, she was ready to cum. So was he. 

He changed the angle of his penetration, so he would rub against her G spot each time, and began nipping at her left breast with his fingers. He sucked on her right breast as a hungry baby would and listened carefully for her reaction. As he began to hear 'Yes Joseph, More Joseph, and other pleadings his right hand moved down to her pussy, and began playing with the soft lips, and skin around her distended, inflamed clitoris. However, he never touched it; he just played around the area it was in. 

Her hips went into overdrive, and her pleadings came every second, but he would not relent. He brought her higher and higher, as he watched her face turned bright red. As the only part of her body that touched the bed was her head and her heels, everything he had sprang into action. 

His left hand squeezed the nipple of her left breast, his teeth bit into the nipple of her right breast, and his right hand grabbed onto her clitoris and squeezed mercilessly. 

One heartbeat later, Sandra screamed into orgasm. So did he. He lay down on top of her, kissed her passionately. 





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 31



150. Let's Party

(Thursday morning) "Maximilian, I am Colonel Lucius Canyon, adjutant to Mister William Zabo. He wants you to know the final count for the wedding of Doctor and Mrs. Joseph Finch is 267 people. That will not create a problem for you, will it?"

Maximilian's heart started to pound. Where in 'God's name' was he going to get everything needed for 67 more people in less than 2 days? He needed at least 2 more top rated chefs, four sous chefs, 20 preppers, and 30 servers.

He also needed two more kitchen trucks to start preparing the meals. Regardless of how lucrative this wedding was going to be, he would never get rid of the headache he would have preparing for it.

"Not at all Colonel, we will be fully prepared for the wedding guests when they arrive. As I promised Doctor Finch, not one of his guests will be denied the dinner of their choice."

"Excellent Maximilian; if everything turns out as well, as we know it will, you can expect to see an article, bearing your name, in the finest food magazines around the world next month."

"I wish to thank Mister Zabo and you Colonel Canyon for your kind words. This will be the finest wedding ever held."

Maximilian hung up the phone, and his chest swelled with pride, but it was also about to explode. He sat down at his desk and started pounding his head on it. He had no other choice, and normally you were fired the next day for incompetence.

He called the Hyatt He called the headquarters, "Culinary Division" and asked to speak to the five time 3 Star Michelin award-winning chef, Arturo Metzler.

"Yes Maximilian, what can I do for you?"

"Chef, I have a problem only you can solve."

"Have you become so inept Maximilian that you need my help?"

"Chef when you hear my problem you won't think so."

"Speak to me, and this better be good or you are out the door."

"Tuesday afternoon, at the behest of Mister William Zabo, I was given orders to prepare for a Saturday afternoon wedding using the entire evening menu, plus some specific requests. I was told to prepare for 200 people. I just received the final headcount, which is 267 people. I have already called in everyone from our hotels, in Dallas and Houston. San Antonio is booked to the gills. Within less than 2 days, I need at least 2 more chefs..."

"Maximilian, I know what you need in the way of staff. They will be put on airplanes tonight, and be at your hotel in the morning. I will call our suppliers, and they will get everything you need by Friday evening. What do you need in the form of special foods, wines, and champagnes?"

After giving the aging chef a list of everything he needed, he told him about the trucks and extra servers he was going to need. He repeated Doctor Finch's words, "I don't want my guests waiting 30 minutes for their meals, and 30 minutes more waiting for their plates to be cleared."

"Chef, if this was a $10 wedding, or a one million-dollar wedding, and Mister Zabo was in attendance, I would make sure everything was perfect."

"I agree with you Maximilian. Who is making the wedding cake?"

"We are making it in-house sir."

"Make it early, and get it out of the kitchen. With all the slamming doors, it will break apart."

"Thank you chef, I didn't think about that."

"Do you want me to come there, and give you a hand?"

"Chef, I would be honored."

"I will be there Friday afternoon. Most other chefs don't want me anywhere near their kitchens."

"I don't understand why chef. It's a chance to learn from the best."

"That's their problem, they know I'm better than they are, and it humbles their pride."

"I don't look at it that way chef. If I can learn by looking at one of these Internet chefs, I'll make use of it. If I get a chance to learn from the very best, you can be guaranteed I will make use of it."

"Thank you Maximilian, I will see you Friday."

***************************************

Sandra just woke up, and she began beating Joseph on his back violently.

"It's Thursday and I don't have a wedding dress you bastard."

"Good morning dear, did you sleep well?"

"You leave me with your parents and our children at 3 o'clock in the afternoon. I never knew your parents were night owls. The kids kept up with them step for step. There was only one person dragging and that was me. At 11 o'clock, I told them I was going home. They called me a wimp.

I told the guys who were driving me home that the person in the back seat is not going to be dead; she was just going to be acting that way. Wake her up, make sure she gets inside the front door, and you hear it lock. If you hear a thud afterwards, don't worry about it, and go on your merry way."

"What does that have to do with you beating me up, 3 hours after I climbed into bed?"

"What did you do to me when you climbed into bed?"

"I did exactly what you asked me to do."

"What did I ask you to do Joseph?"

You turned towards me, gloriously naked, and said, "Make love to me."

"I did not. I was so tired from the evening before, it couldn't have been me talking."

"Are you saying I took you by force?"

"You would never do that Joseph."

"Would you feel between your thighs and see if you are normally wet, or exceedingly wet?"

"What difference would it make? You already said we had sex this morning."

"Yes, however there's a problem. I said we had sex, because you asked me to make love to you. You said you never asked for it. Did I adhere to your request, or did I rape you? The fluids between your legs should tell you the difference."

"I would still be wet."

"Yes, but did I risk getting you pregnant by using one of our daughters extra-large, multicolored, florescent condoms. You know I wouldn't do that to you."

"You are truly a bastard Joseph."

"How can you possibly say that when our children are with my parents?"

Sandra laughed, "Don't you start that argument with me. I will really beat you up if you do. I don't have a wedding dress Doctor Finch; what are you going to do about it?"

"It may be a little big on you, because you've lost some weight. You do have a beautiful wedding dress. I guarantee it."

"You have my wedding dress here, don't you?"

"I'm going back to sleep. I'm extremely tired, and I had a very busy night. I'll see you this afternoon dear."

"If you want to live to see this afternoon, you better tell me where my wedding dress is."

"I'm very tired dear; I'll talk to you later."

There was only one thing for her to do, when he was like this, and she sprang into action.

If he wanted to pretend to be asleep, he was going to do it with her pussy attached to his mouth. She reversed her position, and attempted to smother him with her sex.

As soon as his arms grabbed her thighs to hold her in position, she lay on his body, took his pride and joy down to its root. She rotated her head 45 degrees in each direction, and he moaned deeply into her pussy. She made a note to herself that she must do that again. She nearly had a spontaneous orgasm, due to the vibrations he caused inside her vagina.

She bit the tender head of his dick, and he howled.

"Where is my wedding dress?"

Joseph got even quickly. He bit her clit and she screamed.

"It's being cleaned dammit. Can I go to sleep now?"

"Sure, go right ahead." Her tongue wrapped around the head of his penis and played with the slit on top.

"I don't like you Sandra."

"You will in a few minutes. I'm just helping you fall asleep."

He buried his face in her pussy, and his tongue went fishing for that spot on top of her vagina that drove her crazy. When her hips jumped up, he knew he found it, and pulled her down onto his face.

With her mouth full of him Sandra screamed, "Joseph!"

He smiled and continued rubbing his tongue across the spot. Soon she would drown him, but it would be so worth it.

Sandra's mind was out of control. Joe held her hips so tight. She could not get away from his maddening tongue. No matter which way she tried to move, he was there with her. Dammit, you couldn't fool a Doctor, they knew everything about the human body, and Joseph knew hers intimately. He was driving her to distraction, and to imminent explosion.

She grabbed his dick with both hands, keeping the top in her mouth circling it with her tongue, while sucking on it. She pumped on him, like an oil well devil, pumping him furiously. She was not going to cum before he did. She pumped, and sucked like a Dyson. Finally, his hips came off the bed.

Joseph was working like hell, but she would not cum. He needed something else to spark her orgasm, and he knew what to do. He took his right hand off her back, and spanked her right cheek hard. He was amazed when she didn't scream, so he hit her again. She still didn't scream.

Sandra was off in her own little world working on him, and nothing, nothing was going to make her veer off that path.

He was getting very close. His balls were rising into his body, and his orgasm was imminent. There was only one thing left for him to do. He removed his mouth from her pussy, and went to her extremely inflamed clit. He licked it 4 times.

Sandy's head popped up off his dick and screamed, "Don't do it, I'll bite your dick off if you do."

Sandy put his dick back in her mouth and pressed her teeth around the top to let him know she wasn't kidding around. Her hands kept pumping, and she knew he was close, extremely close. Why wasn't he cuming? She knew he couldn't hold off much longer. The only things touching the bed were his heels and his head. Dammit Joseph, cum already.

The other side of her brain was having a different conversation.

"What was he waiting for? Did he believe me? Is he going to leave me hanging like this? It would be worse than death not to cum now. Dammit Joseph, bite me, bite me now."

Joseph was lying there waiting. He knew what she was going through, and he loved it. She talked a tough game, but she was as soft as a bunny rabbit. Then he felt it, and he couldn't hold it back any longer. He bit Sandy's clit, as soon as he felt his semen moving up the shaft of his penis.

She opened her mouth to scream in pain, and received the first powerful blast of semen into the back of throat. It went so deep, she had to close her mouth and swallow before she choked on the thick viscus material.

Her hands were still pumping, when the 2nd blast hit her in her nose, filling her nostrils, bouncing off into both eyes, and into her hair.

She opened her mouth to scream at him, and received the next volley, directly into her mouth, which shut her up for good.

She realized it was her hands, which were doing all this damage, and she let go of him. 

She wiped the semen out of her eyes, and tried to holler at him, when she exploded onto his face and his chest. She lay there for a few moments recuperating, when she realized what he had done to her.

She screamed, "Look at me, I'm a mess."

He knew he had no answer for her wrath, and he knew what she was going to do to him, so he prepared for a quick escape.

"So am I dear. I need a shower. I'll be back soon."

He took off like a sprinter, around the end of the bed, towards the bathroom.

He didn't have a prayer.

Sandi leapt off the end of the bed and tackled him before he took 5 steps.

With his head held against the carpeting Sandra asked, "Where did you say you were going Doctor Finch?"

"I said I was going to prepare a shower for you dear."

"It didn't sound that way the first time. However, I will give you the benefit of the doubt. The next time I'm going to break your 3rd leg into three different parts, and none of them will ever move again."

"We would both suffer if you did that to me."

"Only for a little while Doctor. In a very small society, we cannot keep the gene pool closed. We must spread those genes widely to prevent disease and inbreeding. We must all go from flower to flower and pollinate with each other. I could do it, because I would be whole, young, and available. With your dick being in 3 separate pieces, I don't think you would qualify."

"I'll put it in a splint before we go into stasis. It should straighten out after 10 years."

"If it does, I'll break it again."

"It's not Saturday yet, I could run away."

"I'll set our two hounds loose. They would find you anywhere you go."

"Is there anything those two can't do?"

"If there is, I haven't found it yet. Why haven't you started my shower yet?"

"Someone weighing about 116 pounds is lying on my back."

"I'll have you know I'm 119 pounds."

"Where the hell are you hiding it?"

"I could be pregnant."

"Sandy that was only 8 days ago."

"It couldn't possibly be, could it?"

"How many days into your cycle where you?"

"It was about 17 or 18 days."

"First I'm going to kill the kids. Then I'm going to go to Amazon and kill the people that boxed those things. Then I'm going to the manufacturer and blow up the machines that made them. Then I'm going to sue them for everything there worth."

"Aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself Joseph?"

"What do you mean?"

"You don't know if I'm pregnant yet."

"Sandi, if anyone could fuck up a free lunch, we could. Let's go to the hospital, and we will find out"

"Can I take a shower first?"

"You look beautiful just the way you are."

"We have a hammer in the house, don't we?"

"I'm not going to tell you where it is, until you tell me why you need it."

"I saw a TV show. This bad guy wanted information. He took a hammer and started by smashing this guy's toes. When he didn't get the information he wanted, he went to the next toe, and so on. If I don't get to take a shower, I'm going to use the hammer on you."

"You do know about the El Niño effect, don't you? It's causing a water shortage all over Texas and the Southwest, all the way to California. It would be better if we took a shower together, and save all the water we can."

"It sounds good in principle, but somehow I don't think we're going to save an awful lot of water."

"There's only one way to find out baby."

151. Stockholm - In Fight-ing?

Dycke, Fiona, and Sistina were invited into the Minister of Foreign Affairs Office. Margo Wallistrom had no idea what business they were there to talk to her about. She only knew that Mister Schneider was a very powerful businessman from the United States, and he needed to speak to someone in authority. She just happened to be available.

As they sat down, Dycke took a metal object out of his inside pocket the size of a pack of cigarettes and rested it on her desk.

"Ms. Wallistron have you ever heard of Doctor Even Luck?"

"Mister Schneider everyone has heard of the good Doctor Luck."

"This is one of his older inventions. He gave it to our government for free, and to certain friends of his. At this moment, nothing said within 15 feet of us can be recorded. If you had a tape recorder within one half inch of your mouth, it would come out blank. Any man that can make sound go around mountains can make it disappear just as easily."

"Why the need for such secrecy Mister Schneider?"

Sistine replied, "We are going to make you two offers, while we are here Miss Wallistrom. The first will be totally legal. The second will be totally legal, and you will get a gratuity, after your government approves it. It's the second part that sometimes people look upon unfavorably. I work in the diplomatic section of Schneider Enterprises, and I travel all over the world. There is not one diplomat that is immune to these gifts as they are called."

"What needs to be done?"

"We need 10 kilos of v51 Vanadium tested pure, delivered to our aircraft within three days."

"That's no problem at all. Do you have the permits?"

"That's the problem. We are waiting for the paperwork to come through Washington, and with the holidays coming everyone's working at half speed. Next week is a three-day week because of Thanksgiving, and then everyone counts down to Christmas."

"How free is your checkbook?"

"It's very liberal."

"I have to call in the Defense, and Finance Ministers."

"Miss Wallistrom, just because you know I make more in a year than Sweden's Gross Domestic Product, doesn't mean I'm going to pay that much for 20 pounds of metal. I have another group of people heading to China at this moment. The first one to strike a deal wins."

"Have a wonderful day Mister Schneider."

"You too Miss Wallistrom."

Dycke took his toy off her desk, and put it in a special casing. As soon as they passed through her doorway, he said to Fiona, "Call the Chinese ambassador in Geneva. Tell him about the site we found in the Gobi desert. We believe it is the actual burial place of Genghis Khan. It's 27 miles northeast of the Onon River, at a bearing of 227 degrees from the highest point of the Burkhan Khaldum Mountain range. Our GPS systems are down, but when our next aircraft arrives, we can give them closer coordinates. Our aircraft should be on site in less than 20 hours."

"Are you sure you want to give them the whole ball of wax Dycke, before we get an agreement?"

"Do you know what they stand to lose if they screw us on this deal? $36 billion in workers pay and benefits for starters. And that's only if I close down two factories for one year. What comes out of those factories as exports will kill them."

Three people were listening to this conversation with great interest, as Dycke, Fiona, and Sistine continued walking towards the exit.

"As they were preparing to leave the building the guards at the exits said, "Miss Wallistron would like to see you."

Dycke smiled at the guard. "I know she's a little old for you, and she looks like Medusa, but if you turned her around and had her face the wall, you could fuck her, instead of telling her to go fuck herself."

The guard doubled over laughing, but Sistine smacked Dycke hard.

"I'm very happy that you're feeling better, but one more remark like that out of you and I'll kill you myself. I have to work with these people, year after year, and if you upset one of them, you upset all of them. It will take me years to repair a remark like that for Schneider Industries."

"It's all right Sistina, if you have to work harder, I'll give you a raise."

"I'm not asking for a fucking raise, I'm asking you to return to normal. Business is business, if you want to fuck around with Even that's fine. We are in Stockholm, the capital of Sweden. Act like you are a major player in world economics, not like some kid with a chip on your shoulder."

"Alright teacher, I have been spanked for today. Let's go back and see what Miss Wallistron has to say."

When they walked back in her office, she was bracketed by the defense minister, Peter Hullquist on her right, and Per Bouland, on her left.

"Ministers, this is Mister Dycke Schneider of Schneider industries. Mister Schneider would you take out your little toy please?"

Dycke placed the metal object on the table and waited for their next move.

The defense minister took out took out a high-end 4g mp3 recording device, placed it with in inches of the box Dycke put down, and asked him to tell them about the beginnings of the Schneider industries.

Dycke accommodated them for about five minutes. He said, "If that's not enough information for you we are leaving."

Mister Bouland said, "I believe that will be quite enough Mister Schneider."

He rewound the machine to the beginning, and hit play. After 15 seconds, he fast forwarded it, and hit play again. He did this several times until the numbers on the machine matched where he turned it off originally.

"Why has Doctor Luck not put this on the market? It would be another one of his major moneymakers."

"Doctor Luck doesn't always look for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. He also looks out for his nation's welfare. He gifted this item to the President of the United States, as well as its patents and technical information. He also told the president not to have the agencies try it on him, because he had already found a way to defeat it."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 31



"I'm sure it made your president laugh."

"The president may have laughed, but when it got handed down to the military you can be sure they didn't. Sometimes my good friend is evil, and he does it to me all the time. On something like this, he may tell you he has already found a way to defeat it, and he really has no idea how to do it. What he really is doing is making the military fund projects into basic science. They are spending money in areas they normally like to cut, but now they have no choice. If one person knows a way to break their secret weapon, they want to find out first how it's done so they can block it.

Science is Even's life. If you drew a line and put science on one side, and his family on the other, he wouldn't know what to do. He would stand on the line forever, because he loves both of them so much."

"Why does your friend need 10 kilos of v51 Vanadium? Only laboratories use that because of its half-life."

"Minister, if anyone knows the answer to that question besides Doctor Even Luck; it's not me or the two people that sit beside me. He will not tell anyone what it's for. However, when that idiot calls me, and he tells me that he needs a working model with four weeks, I have it ready for him in four weeks. You must remember he is leaving this planet in 6 weeks, and all that material is leaving with him. He wants a working model in four weeks, and six working models to go with him, and enough parts for 10 more to be assembled while they are in flight.

I have to build these *things*, in South Carolina, and I don't know how big they are. I have to fly them around the tip of Florida, South of Houston Texas, land them in Austin. Then I have to truck them to Temple. We are not here on a lark, ministers. We are here because that man is going to do something historic. .Sweden or the China is going to make Doctor Luck's invention possible. We will make sure the world knows which country made it a success."

"How much are you willing to pay for the Vanadium?"

"Fiona bring up the latest numbers."

"1000 grams is $9072 Dycke."

"So 1000 grams is $10,000. 20,000 grams equals 20 pounds. I don't want a discounted price. $10,000 a gram times 20,000 grams, using my math comes out to $20 million, for the Vanadium. Let's make that $30 million so everyone's happy.

"Fiona how much for the exit fees and documents?"

"It's .3275 percent boss."

"We'll rounded off to 4%, so that is another comes out to $1,200,000 right? We will round that up to another $2 million."

"Boss, when I go back to school I want to be your teacher. $1,200,000 does not equal $2 million. When we get home, I am going to hurt you so bad."

"Then we have the language barrier fee of $1 million each, which I think everyone would agree, should not wind up in a bank in Sweden, but in Switzerland, as 6 million Deutschmarks.

Also, because of my errors in math, it would mean that we would be wheels up, by noon, the day after tomorrow, with the vanadium package securely in four, dual lead lined, containers. It will be marked from the Swedish Academy of Science to Schneider Industries as "Scientific Instruments. Does everyone agree?"

"Yes, it is agreed."

"Is there any paperwork you need signed by us now, so we can get it out of the way, and get the ball rolling?"

Per Bolund said, "You can accompany me to the finance office. My people are out to lunch. We can get your paperwork completed and stamped without their knowledge."

"That's the way your office works too, isn't it Fiona?"

"I'm so happy you're feeling better. I'm going to take you to our gym and make you hurt all over again, just in different places."

"Your a mommy, you can't hurt people anymore."

"Do you want to ask my boys that question, and see what answer you get out of them?"

"They would lie for you. All boys would lie for their mother."

"I think I liked you better, while you were sick. No, I hated it when you were sick. I hate it when you feel sorry for yourself, and stopped doing things like a man is supposed to do. We will pick this discussion up, after the paperwork is done."

The finance office was huge, and had pictures all over the walls. Dycke winked at Fiona, and she nodded in reply.

Dycke said, "Minister would you give me a tour of the office and tell me about these wonderful pictures you have on the walls. They look like beautiful paintings. I've never seen anything like them in my life."

Per Bolund said with pride, "These are all pictures of Sweden's villages, towns, cities, and national parks. It would be my honor to explain each of them to you."

Dycke replied, "They look so wonderful, it's like they were made for a motion picture."

Bolund smiled again, and began Dycke's tour of each picture.

Fiona whispered, "Sistina, walk around the office looking at the pictures. Get me anything that looks like an official document, or stamp. Don't duplicate anything"

"I can't do that, I'm Irish."

"You will eat potatoes for the rest of your life."

"You are mean Fiona."

In less than five minutes, Fiona and Sistine had multiples of every document, and document stamp in the office in their bags. No desk in the office was left unrifled, not even the ministers.

When Per and Dycke returned 10 minutes later Sistine asked, "I know in Norway these waterways are call fjord's. What do you call them?"

The minister laughed. "We call them fjords. They are called fjords all around the world. New Zealand, Alaska, Norway, anywhere you have a waterway inlet with steep mountain walls on each side, they call it a fjord."

"Thank you minister, every day you live, you learn something new."

Fiona said, "I thought your father was a Navy captain."

"Be quiet Fiona, can't I have a little fun, while we are here?"

"Remind me to put a snake in your drawer, when we get home."

"Oh goody, I love snakes. I'll put tiny dead rats under your desk, and turn my snake loose. We will see which one of us has more fun."

Dycke called out, "Fiona come over here and countersign these documents for me please."

Dycke signed each page, and so did Fiona. Fiona had the extra chore, of making out the checks.

Dycke kept harassing her. "That's too many zeros."

Fiona stopped, counted the zeros, looked at him, and growled. When she got to the very last checks for the ministers, and saw him open his mouth, she jabbed her fountain pen into his thigh.

Dycke started jumping up and down, and screaming in the ministers office.

Fiona calmly closed the cap, to her now destroyed pen, took out a new one, and continued writing.

Dycke was still whining, when the minister asked, "How long have you worked together?"

"He was 18, and I was 28. I was 18 months out of MI 6 and a short stint as a close protection agent, when I was transferred to watch over him. He was too good a person then, and he is still too good now. I've never seen a person with so much money not get spoiled. He can't give his money away fast enough."

"He could fire you for doing that."

"I threatened to quit on the way here, he wouldn't let me."

"He's a tough boss."

"He's the best boss you could ever work for. Let me go pat him on the head, and kick him in the ass so we can get moving. Thank you minister, it's been a pleasure"

"Likewise Mrs. Short."

Sistina opened the office door, while Fiona walked Dycke through it. As soon as they were in a deserted hallway, she kicked him in the ass.

"Stop whining before I tie you into a seat in the aircraft all the way back to Charleston."

"I could have blood poisoning because of you."

"Let's go to the hospital, and I will have them remove your leg."

"Fiona, you're fired."

"Sistine did you hear what he said?"

"I sure did. I'll testify to it in court."

"For clarity would you say that one more time Dycke?"

"I said you're fired."

"Thank you Dycke, I have wanted to do this to you for months. Remember, you've earned it for being such an asshole."

Dycke never saw it coming. The heel of her left foot connected with his jaw, and before the nerves could register the pain signals to his brain, the left side of her hand hit the brachial complex, between his shoulder and spine. He was unconscious as his body moved fluidly towards the floor.

Sistina grabbed him before he was halfway down.

"Will you help me with this bozo, he weighs a ton."

"He only weighs 175 pounds, so stop exaggerating."

"What are we going to do with him?"

We are going to bring him to the aircraft first class naturally."

The two women dragged him out of the building, towards the waiting limousine.

Tom grabbed Dycke, and asked, "What happened to him?"

"He got out of line, and I had to straighten him out. Let's put him in the trunk, and get us to our aircraft, as quickly as possible. He needs more of the medication I just gave him."

They dumped Dycke's body into the huge trunk, with a gentle thump.

Sistine said, "Fiona, we don't want to kill him, we are here to help him."

"Killing him may be the only way to help him."

When they were settled in the limo, Fiona took out her cell phone and called Bob.

"How much trouble did he get us in?"

"He did a great job, Bob. We will have our Vanadium the day after tomorrow. However, our boss is sleeping in the trunk, because he was making an ass of himself. Then he made me the happiest person on the planet."

"He fired you."

"Yes dear, I am unemployed, and my former boss is unconscious."

"Did anyone see you hit him?"

"Sistine saw me hit him, but no one else."

"In other words, no one so you hit him."

"You are correct."

"Why are you calling me?"

"I need something to tie up both his hands, and feet. I don't want anything that's going to cut into his skin."

"I have just the thing, if we were at home."

"You dirty old man. Do you think you can find any in Sweden?"

"Do they have Google here?"

"Work quickly Bob, he's not going to be asleep permanently, at least I hope not."

"How hard did you hit him?"

"I hit him with everything I had."

"Was he breathing when you put him in the trunk?"

"I think so."

"I'll buy a body bag just in case."

"Forget the body bag for now. Get me the cuffs, they are more important."

**********************

When Dycke woke up and realized where he was, he screamed.

"Fiona, I fired you."

Bob Short walked up the right side of the chamber and said, "She knows that boss. She's at the airport hotel waiting for her flight to Washington. Then, she will fly home to Charleston. If you want to fire me, I'll join her. At this moment, more than half of the staff is ready to quit, because of the way you're acting."

"What's the matter with the way I am acting?"

"For the first time since I've known you, you are acting like a spoiled brat. No one who came along for this ride can remember you acting this way."

"Why can I move my feet?"

"You can move your feet, however, you must move them together. Like your hands, they have leather cuffs attached to them, with pink bows and ribbons to match your attitude. We thought it would make you feel closer to your real nature.

A little girl knocked you out, and you have no idea what she hit you with. Fiona said it was the most fun she had in years, but especially due of the way you've been acting these past few weeks.

You are going to be fed high-energy drinks, and you are going to talk with Doctor Russell for the next 4 to 6 hours, or until he cannot stand your crying any longer. This will continue until we leave for home.

I've spoken with Doctor Luck. I advised him not to expect his project to be finished on time. I don't have to tell you how he reacted to that news, because you already know. You should be happy you are here, more than 5000 miles away from him. If you were much closer, he would come after you, and ring your neck. Depending on how busy he is at this moment, I wouldn't be too comfortable. 5000 miles is only 10 hours away by jet, and the good doctor can afford a fast one."

"Thank you for brightening my afternoon Bob. How many security people did we bring with us?"

"We brought six agents including me. If Doctor Luck shows up, we are going to take a smoking break. You know smoking is not permitted on the tarmac. So we will be far, far away, from this aircraft."

"I thought you said I was the pussy."

"There is a time to fight, and a time to retreat. That's what the six of us are going to be doing. If and when Doctor Luck gets here, he's going to be like a tank going against jeeps. I don't want to be one of those jeeps."

"I wouldn't want to be one of those jeeps either Bob. Give me something to drink, and show Doctor Russell in. If he can flesh out why I'm flying off the handle all the time, maybe I can get back to work."

"We know what your problem is. You are never going to be whole again, until you find a way to fix that problem."

"Why am I paying the eminent Doctor Russell $10,000 a day, when you have the answers to my problems Bob?"

"He has the diplomas and I don't."

"Call Fiona, and have her call the Russian Bureau to see if that cell is still available for you. I'll even throw in a pillow and a blanket."

"What would I use the rats for then Dycke?"

"Get me my drink please, and tell your wife to look at her contract. The only way she can be fired is in writing, and I never wrote anything down."

"Boss, she is going to kill you."

"She threw a mean left foot at me today. However, it wasn't until her right-hand hit my neck that I went unconscious."

"If you tell her that, she will find a new way to kill you. She was sure you were out cold when she hit your jaw."

"No, she missed. She hit me a little too far forward, so it was only painful, not disabling."

"Pull the straw down; your energy drink is attached to the system."

"Oh God is this stuff putrid."

"When you start acting like a normal human being, you can eat normal human being food. Until then, you drink this shit."

"An unhealthy mind and an unhealthy body."

"You should read the list of vitamins, minerals, and other good things your body needs that are in this stuff."

"I'd still rather a Chicken Caesar salad, a large baked potato with a load of butter, and a wedge of pecan pie."

"You forgot to order your drink with it."

"You're right; I'd like a large glass of cold milk."

"You just ruined the entire meal for me. Let me get Doctor Russell, and I will empty the plane so your conversation is private. Tom will have the back door; I will have the front door."

"Thank you Bob, and don't forget to call Fiona. I want her back here when I finish speaking to the good Doctor."

"If the aircraft goes on fire, you'll know who did it."

"She won't be that angry with me, will she?"

"Are you a betting man? What a stupid question that is. You bet Payne she was pregnant less than two weeks after your wedding, and you won. When Fiona sees you, smoke will be coming out both of her ears."

"In that case, I'm happy I'll be in here."

"I don't know how you do it Dycke, but for as long as I've known you I've never seen you lose a bet."

"If all goes the way Even and I have it worked out, you will see me lose one on Christmas Day."

"What are you two working on now?"

"I'm not saying a thing to anyone, because I will jinx the entire operation. Just pray for the both of us that it works, because if it doesn't my family will disintegrate."

"I will pray for all of you every day. It is more than just a promise that comes from my heart."

"Thank you Bob, call Fiona, I want to hear her scream."

****************************

Doctor Russell sat down next to the hyperbaric chamber and asked Dycke what his friends thought his problems were that they were willing to give up their careers to help him?

Suddenly, in the front of the aircraft, someone dropped something, and yelled, "God dammit."

Dycke laughed. "Doctor that was Bob Short on the receiving end of his wife's expletive, when she found out she wasn't a free woman. She has been trying to get the upper hand on me for nearly 25 years, and she thinks I keep putting things in her contract that slip by her. Earlier today, before she knocked me out, I told her she was fired, not once, but twice, in front of a very good witness. She was so happy she gave me a leg kick to the jaw and a chop to the brachial plexus on my right side. She went to the hotel and waited for the aircraft to take her home. Bob just told her she wasn't going anywhere."

"Who is this woman, and what does she do for you?"

"First, I don't like the inference you just made. Fiona and I have always been best friends, and that's as far as it has ever gone. She has taught me more about myself, life, and safety than any other person in the world. She is in charge of the entire Western Hemisphere operations of Schneider industries. She knows more about what's going on in my businesses than I do. She leaves me enough time to play with my new inventions, or inventions that come from other people like Doctor Even Luck.

That bastard is my best friend, but he always gives me the shortest timelines to finish what he needs. That's why we're in Sweden. We have a six-week timeline to develop something earth shattering. Even Luck is the only person in the world who knows what it is. The only thing he has told us is we need 20 kilos of Vanadium, and we needed it within 10 days. We obtained it, and we will be wheels up, and on our way home to find out what we have to build sometime tomorrow. I can't wait to find out what it is, and what it's supposed to do."

"You love this, don't you Mister Schneider? You love being on the edge of something new, however you have no idea how to deal with your marital problems. Isn't that correct?"

"Doctor, I don't know if anyone told you about how Payne and I got together in the beginning. Her mother caused us the same type problem. I had inherited a tremendous amount of money. I had just turned 18 years old, and I wanted to show Payne the world, before my new businesses and my obligations tied me to a desk. I showed her mother how she could use a personal satellite device to see and talk to her daughter every day. It would be better than having Payne away at Duke University, where she wouldn't be able talk to her but once a week or so, and not see her but maybe once or twice a semester. Her mother said no. I turned around and left.

If I said what I wanted to say to her, there would have been no chance for reconciliation. Her mother was acting like a child. She was holding onto Payne like a toy and would not let her go.

That's what Payne is doing now, and she can't see the similarity.

There is a two-year-old girl who is clairvoyant. She has predicted things that have come true for our families five times so far. The sixth one scares me to death. Teddy has predicted that if Zoie stays home, she will die very soon in an accident. Payne will take it so hard she will be in a mental institution for years afterwards. She will never return to the woman she is now. It will become so bad I will leave her. I don't know if you realize how much I love and adore my wife. If I have to leave Payne, it would be like cutting my heart out."

Doctor Russell said, "Didn't you leave something out?"

"I'm going to kill you; you no good rotten bastard."

"Doctor Russell, I would like you to meet the mouth that roared, Fiona Short."

"We've already met Dycke. Her husband is the one that offered me $10,000 a day. I didn't make that much playing basketball."

"It's a shame Doctor Russell, these kids coming out of school after one year don't have one 10th the talent that you had."

"That's in my past Mister Schneider; let's talk about your future."

"Doctor, if you let me take him out of there, he won't have a future."

"I'm very comfortable Doctor Russell, how about you?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 31



"I just sat down Mister Schneider. It seems to me Mrs. Short is in need of some counseling to control her temper. Would you like to make this a group session?"

"I don't have a temper, ask my husband."

"You mean the man who screamed, dropped his cell phone, and grabbed his ears after you yelled at him?"

"That wasn't my fault. He told me Dycke just trapped me again."

"May I ask you two personal questions?"

"Yes, go ahead."

"Have you signed contract extensions or new contracts in the last 25 years?"

"Yes I have."

"You have an extremely important job. In most of the company's you would be making between $8, and $12 million a year plus bonuses and benefits. What is your current income, including those two items?"

"That's how the bastard keeps me here."

"I don't believe that was my question."

"Would you like me to tell him Fiona?"

"If you open your mouth Dycke, you will find my fist and it."

Bob yelled from the front of the aircraft, "Do you want me to tell him dear?"

"Only if you want to eat 'DEAR' meat for dinner tonight Bob."

"She doesn't have a temper Doctor, she's always that way."

"I'll talk to you in a few minutes Bob. You won't like what I have to say."

"Remember who picks up the mats dear."

"Fuck you Bob."

"Here or at the hotel?"

"I'm going to kill that man; sooner or later."

"Mrs. Short, you were about to tell me what your total income is."

"I hate you Dycke, you sniveling bastard. $39,999,000 a year net income. He won't give me the extra dollar for some reason, and Dycke pays my taxes"

"Say that again?"

"$39,999,000 a year net income, and Dycke pays my taxes.

"Mister Schneider are you out of your fucking mind? 99 percent of CEOs don't make that much money."

"I know, but every time she threatens to quit, she has to think about how much money she's going to lose. If she goes to General Motors, Boeing, or General Electric, and they ask her for her salary requirements, she's not going to know what to say.

When the head of Human Resources asks her how much she made at her last position, and she says $60 million a year, they are going to say you are overqualified, thank you very much for applying for this opening."

"I hate you Dycke, you've ruined my life."

"I ruined your life. The British government put a gun in your hand, when you were 14 years old. You had a double Masters by the time you were 19. They had you fuck men you didn't know, so they could get secret information from them. Then when their budget got tight, they threw you away, like so much garbage.

I'm the one that ruined your life; I don't think so Fiona.

As soon as you became pregnant, Bob, Marty, my father, and I hatched a plan to take the guns out of your hand permanently, and send you for your PhD. Since you graduated, you have been the head of all my companies in the Western Hemisphere. Even though you refuse to live in it, I gave you one of the six buildings in my complex. Why, because it was always you, Marty, our parents, and us together that made my businesses grow. That building is only worth $850 million. I gave each of you one of them for free, because you made me who I am today. I don't believe I ruined your life:

I believe it was fast food."

"Come out of there you bastard, and I'll teach you a lesson you'll never forget."

"Mrs. Short, is that the way you always settle your differences with your boss?"

"Keep out of this Doctor Russell. I've known that imp for more than 25 years. I know how to straighten him out."

"If I come out of here Fiona, I'm going to beat your ass to a pulp. For the last seven years, I've been training with François Vallend. I am not the innocent you knock down this morning."

"Bullshit, you're just trying to scare me."

"Doctor, I'm going to have to interrupt our session for about eight minutes. One minute to get out of this thing. Two minutes for my legs to get their circulation back, and another minute to walk outside. When Mrs. Short is ready, it will take me less than one minute to put her on the floor, and end this argument. I will return upstairs, and get into the hyperbaric chamber again. Then we can continue our session. I hope that's all right with you."

"I would say I don't have any choice in this matter Mister Schneider."

"Bob make sure her head doesn't hit the floor too hard. She has a few years left on her contract, and after today's exhibition of hatred for her boss, I'm going to make her sign an extension for 10 more years, with no out clause. Do you still think you are going to beat me Fiona?"

"When I beat you, you will sign a letter releasing me from your employment."

"Agreed."

"Shit, I'm in trouble. That bastard never lies."

Doctor Russell asked, "What do you mean Mrs. Short?"

"Many years ago, he did the same thing to the head of our security force. He bet Marty that he would beat her and the rest of our security team by 10 minutes, in a marathon. We had several people on our team, who were accomplished marathoners. As far as we knew, he never ran more than half that distance.

He bet Marty she had to wear dresses to work for the rest of the time she was employed by him, and only he could fire her. She had never worn a dress before. She was a warrior, and dressed the part.

She bet him that he had to keep our entire team employed for a minimum of 10 years, with appropriate raises, and he would have to call her 'your Majesty' for the rest of that term.

She was warned not to take that bet because Dycke never lies. NEVER! However, Marty took the bet.

He won the marathon by more than 10 minutes, and for the first time in her life, Marty wore a dress. She wore dresses for the next 13 years and she looked wonderful.

Dycke commented on how good she looked every day she walked into work. Seconds afterwards, he would have to duck away from a flying missile."

"Did you inherit your temper from this woman?"

Dick was sitting at the edge of the hyperbaric chambers bed, with his legs hanging off, when he said, "No Doctor, Marty bred Fiona's temper into her, along with a friend and business partner of mine, His Lordship...."

"Leave him out of it, he's my son's godfather, and he's like a father to me."

"I'm missing a session with my psychiatrist. Can we go downstairs and get this over with now please?"

"I'm going to break your neck."

"I'm going to get even with you for the first day we were in the hospital with Payne. You are going to hurt for a week."

"Bob help!"

"You opened your big mouth, not me. I'll tend to you as soon as it's over."

"Thanks a lot dear."

"You're welcome."

They walked down the rear stairs of the 767, and Dycke started loosening up.

Since no rules had been established, Fiona attacked him, while he was doing a handstand. She went for a disabling kick to his left kidney.

When her foot reached him, he wasn't there.

He inverted his position, and his legs were around her chest trapping her arms. He forced her backwards over her legs, and she was defenseless.

His left hand pushed her neck backward, and his right fist was back, ready for the kill.

He said, "Yield, or die."

Fiona said, "No."

Dycke's fist started coming down amid yells, and screams of, "No, and don't do it."

His fist missed her throat by a millimeter.

He looked into her eyes. "I am not a murderer. Get me a piece of paper and a pen. If you want to leave my employment so badly that you are willing to die for it, I'll sign it, and be gone from my life."

He stood up turned, and saw Doctor Russell standing there looking horrified at him.

"Doctor do you have a prescription pad?"

"Yes I do."

"Would you mark the front of one page 'void', so I can write on the back of it."

Russell did as he was asked.

Dycke wrote, "Fiona Short is Fired. Dycke Schneider." He signed it, and asked Doctor Russell to countersign it.

He walked over to Fiona, who was in Bob's arms, and threw her the piece of paper.

"I wish you all the happiness you seek." He handed her the piece of paper.

"Thank you boss."

"I am no longer you boss. I'll order a private jet to take you home. Bob the choice is yours. You can stay employed with me, until Fiona decides what to do, or you have enough years in to retire now. Let me know what you decide."

"I'll take a week off, and tend to her. I'll let you know after that time."

"That'll be fine Bob."

****************

What went on around the Schneider Boeing 767 was the talk of the tarmac. It seemed that everyone, from the police, mechanics, baggage handlers, and food service personnel knew that two top executives from the Schneider corporation fought outside their aircraft, and the chief financial officer was fired on the spot.

Normally, this would not make any difference to the people in the Swedish government. It did to three particular people, with larceny on their minds, when they found out the names of the two combatants.

Why should they settle for a few million Deutschmarks, when they could have more than $70 million by not having the appropriate documents and stamps brought to the aircraft, along with the Vanadium?

I don't think it will come as any surprise to you that as you approach the third week in November, Sweden only has three, or four hours of sunlight per day, as the Earth continues rotating on its axis until the sun reaches 23.7 degrees south latitude. The sunlight that reaches the northern latitudes in mid- November does not rise until after 10 o'clock in the morning

At 4 AM, the phone rang in Fiona's suite.

"Hello."

"Mrs. Short, I have been told your aircraft has arrived, and is refueling now. It will be ready to leave in 90 minutes. You must go through customs before you leave. Have a safe flight home."

"Thank you very much."

She turned on the light and said, "Bob get up our aircraft is here. We have a lot to go."

When he didn't answer her, she turned, looked at his side of the bed, and he wasn't there. She jumped out of bed, went into the main room, and saw him looking out the windows."

She walked over to him, put her arms around him, and she asked kindly, "What the fuck are you doing?"

"I'm waiting for sunrise."

"You asshole, that won't be here until April."

"I can guarantee you one thing; I won't be here in April."

"You are a wuss Bob."

"I didn't get beaten in eight seconds yesterday."

"Did you know he was taking lessons from the Vallend?"

"I had no idea who he was taking lessons from, but I knew he was taking lessons to let off steam. I don't think I've ever seen that move before, and he was lightning quick with it."

"The worst part about it Bob is that he baited me with it. He knew I would come at him, because he was in what looked like a disadvantaged position. He ate me up with it. He's always at least one-step ahead of me."

"Let's get dressed, and get out of here."

***************************

As they were being driven out to their aircraft, the Schneider Boeing 767 was lit up with floodlights, and people were milling around waiting for their baggage to arrive. Fiona asked the driver if she could say goodbye to some of her friends before proceeding on to her aircraft.

With a $100 bill in his hand, he said, "Yes," even though it was against the rules. He stayed in the warmth of the cab, while Bob and Fiona went over to their friends, and colleagues to bid them goodbye.

The baggage handler bringing the luggage for the 767 stopped beside the other driver, and yelled, "What are you doing? You were not allowed to stop here."

"Those two are saying goodbye to their friends. She is the one that was in the fight yesterday, and lost. I'm giving her a few minutes, and then taking her to her aircraft to leave."

Fiona and Bob turned, and started walking back towards their cab.

"Look, here they come now. It didn't take them two minutes."

"You owe me a drink, otherwise I'll report you."

"I'll buy you two drinks for what they gave me."

"You bastard, you are always lucky one."

As they reached the cab, Bob asked the driver if he got in trouble.

"If he reports me, I'm in trouble."

Bob handed the other driver $100.

"If you say one word about this, I will report you to your supervisor, and tell him I smelled alcohol on your breath."

"We are friends; there will be no disharmony between us."

"Thank you gentlemen enjoy your long night. I'm going to where the sun is."

Bob got into the cab and snuggled up to Fiona.

"If the engines don't start, I'm going to cry."

"Did all go well?"

"Yes I saw Tom and Deke slip away from our cab."

They climbed on-board, and the stewardess closed the door behind them. They heard the starboard engine start, and Bob kissed Fiona.

"I don't care if it's raining at home, it will still be 70 degrees or above, and the sun will be shining.

"I can't take you anywhere can I?"

"As long as it's below the Mason-Dixon line, I'll go with you. If it's above it, it depends on the time of the year."

"Fasten your seatbelts please, we are first for departure."

A moment later, the engines roared, they were forced back into their seats, there were a few bumps, and then all became quiet as the landing gear came up and locked into position.

It's weird to fly northwest at the beginning of your trip, when your destination is to the south. However, that is the way the great circle route makes your trip the shortest. If you were to fly in a straight line from Stockholm to Charleston, you add 800 miles and nearly 2 hours to your flight.

The passengers on the 767 boarded the aircraft, and Dycke returned to the hyperbaric chamber.

Suddenly, the aircraft was surrounded by police vehicles, and officers boarded the aircraft. They ordered Dycke to come out of the chamber, because he was under arrest.

He came out of the chamber, and asked what the charges were.

The officer said, "You are attempting to smuggle radioactive material out of our country, without the appropriate permits."

Dick replied, "Our request for the Vanadium was denied by your government. Who is charging us with this crime, because we did not have access to the Vanadium, without their approval? You have my permission to search this entire aircraft, from nose to tail, from top to bottom. You have my personal guarantee there is no contraband on it."

"We're going to search everyone's luggage, and the entire inside of the aircraft. No one is to leave."

"Commander, you still have not told me who has charged me with this crime. I will make sure the papers know about this abomination in the morning."

"The Foreign Minister has charged you with this crime Mister Schneider."

"Oh, the woman I told to go fuck herself, because she was uglier than Medusa."

"That would be one way to get her angry with you Mister Schneider."

"It's the truth is in it? I told her that just after she refused my request for the Vanadium. I went to the defense minister, and the finance minister, and got the same answer from them. I have a team headed for China to make a deal for the Vanadium with them. Why would I have to steal from your country, when I'm making a deal with another?"

"I don't know Mister Schneider, but I do have my orders, and I have to follow them."

"I would expect you to follow them to the letter of the law. My people will do anything that you ask, as quickly as you ask it, and so will I. The flight crew will follow your orders also. Please begin."

After searching each piece of luggage, sealing it with appropriate documentation, searching the belly, and luggage areas inside the aircraft they found nothing. The final search was with Geiger counters looking for traces of radioactive materials, and none was found. After the exhaustive search, police commander called it off.

"I am sorry for delaying your departure Mister Schneider. Now I have to investigate why the three ministers accused you of stealing this material when you did not. I should get some very interesting answers."

"Here is my card commander. I would appreciate hearing what those answers are. If they are criminal answers, I'm sure my attorneys would love to come to this beautiful country of yours to find out why they picked me as a person of interest."

"You can be guaranteed I will be in touch Mister Schneider."

As soon as everything was replaced inside the aircraft, and everyone was buckled up, the starboard engine was started.

Before Dycke returned to the hyperbaric chamber he said to Sistina, "You know what to do."

"Dycke if you don't return to normal when we get back to Charleston, I'm going to beat the shit out of you every day. While you are lying on the floor bleeding, you will have a session with Doctor Russell. Do you understand?"

"I could fire you too."

"You haven't fired anyone yet."

"Yes, but everything went well, didn't it?"

"Get into the chamber before I start hitting you now."

"Yes mommy."

As soon as the aircraft was in the air, the lights in the forward section were turned off, and only the lights over the hyperbaric chamber were left on.

Doctor Russell sat down, and said, "Dycke what are we going to do about your major problem?"

"Doc, I have a plan afoot, and if it doesn't work everything is lost."

"Why don't you tell me about it, and I'll give you my opinion."

"In all my life, I have never lost a bet. Regardless of how big or small, I have never lost one. I am about to bet everything I love on this bet, and I want to lose it with all my heart."

"Okay, you have me totally confused; keep going."

"My best friend, and chief antagonist, Even Luck said to me a long time ago I should bet him the most precious thing I own except for Payne, and he would bet me the most precious thing he owned, excepted Jennifer, on the size of his cock. He said it reached the top of his knee, and always has to strap it there to keep it under control. I said bullshit. He told me to take the bet. I looked into his eyes, and for some reason or another, I couldn't take the bet. Doctor, no one has a dick that long. I was tempted to check online to see what the record was, but I've never done that before. It's like cheating and I never cheat, because it's like lying, and I never lie. I was caught in a trap so I never took the bet and he never mentioned it again.

On the way here, he was antagonizing me again, when it hit me. I wouldn't be betting Payne. I would be betting Zoie. I would be giving him Zoey if he won, and I wasn't worried about what he would give me. It would be perfect if he weren't lying to me. I yelled, "Do you swear to me you are going to win this bet?

He said, "It's strapped to my knee right now. Are you sure you don't want to see it in action, while I use it on Jennifer?"

"I told him the church frowns on pornographic movies."

"He said it would be instructional."

"I like your friend Even Luck. I'd like to meet him before he goes away."

"Why don't you come with us, as an expert witness to the length of his monster? That's what his wife, Jennifer, calls it."

"I would consider it in honor. It would also make me feel insignificant, in comparison. What is your fallback plan?"

"There is none. If I kidnap Zoey, and put her on the spacecraft, Payne will never forgive me. She will file for divorce, and my heart will be broken."

"Can your daughter keep the secret, and I mean a very big secret?"

"I can't get near my daughter alone. My wife is always inches away from her when I am at home."

"Does she go out by herself at all?"

"No, she is always guarded."

"Have her guard give her a letter from you telling her exactly what you are going to do, and see if she approves. All you need is a one-word answer, yes or no? She will give it to the guard, and the guard will get it to you. You can continue communicating with her that way. Don't let her use her cell phone, because her mother will probably check to see if she's called you or not."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 31



"That's great Doctor, I like talking to you. Where do you live?"

"I live just outside of Boston."

"Do you like the winters there?"

"I do, but my bones don't."

"What would you think about moving to Charleston South Carolina, and working on a retainer for me?"

"I would have to close down my practice, and sell my house, but other than that, what are we talking about in the form of the retainer?"

"What do you think doctor, would $6 million a year be too little?"

"I think I should have worn a higher number when I played basketball. Do you know everything about everything Mister Schneider?"

"It's a curse, and a blessing Doctor Russell. I have a photographic memory, with total recall. I see it once, and I can't forget it. Payne has a photographic memory, but she doesn't have total recall. It drives her nuts sometimes."

"Do you think she would see me?"

"Not in 1 billion years Doctor. She would know what you were there for, and her defenses would come up instantly."

"What if I call her, and tell her I am your psychiatrist. I need to speak to her in reference to you. I fear you are going to have a nervous breakdown very soon. You refuse to take medication, because you're about to undertake a very important project, and your actions are manic at best."

"You can try it Doctor, but I'm not sure if she'll care. At this moment, her only thought is for Zoey to stay here with her until the spacecraft takes off. After that it won't matter, because what Teddy said will come to pass."

"You are absolutely sure of that, aren't you?"

"As sure as I am in this chamber."

"Let me think for a while to see if I can come up with an alternate plan to keep this tragedy from coming about."

"When you complete your move down to Charleston, you can open your own practice again, and do your speeches, but if I need you, I want you by my side as quickly as possible."

"For $6 million a year, I'll sprout wings."

"Did I tell you we have six lovely buildings where you can get discounted rent and lovely office space?"

"No, you left that out."

"I'll let my mother show you her building first. My mother can show you her building second. Marty can show your her building next. Don't argue with Marty, you will live to regret it. Steve, my brother-in-law, will show you his building. And Fiona or Bob will show you theirs. Either Payne or I will show you around our building. It's part of the bylaws of our association. It keeps the owners in touch with the people that are buying, and selling their units. Most of our buildings have over 90 percent occupancy rates, even though our maintenance fees are quite high. We keep them there to make sure the place always look immaculate, and there are very few complaints about it."

**********************

As the aircraft taxied up to the Schneider Industries terminal, US Customs was waiting for it. Fiona and Bob exited the aircraft, and presented their passports.

The customs agent asked, "Do you have anything to declare?"

Bob said, "No, but I'm glad there will be sunlight here in the morning. I don't understand how people can work without it. Here comes our luggage."

"These went through customs in Sweden. You are cleared to go."

"Thank you officer."

They walked into the terminal, and as soon as the doors were closed, the two suitcases were put into large brown boxes, sealed with striped red tape, marked Factory 1, EXPEDITE.

The boxes were in a truck and on their way to the factory in five minutes.

*********************

A call was placed to Temple Texas. Even picked up the line.

"This is Even Luck, and if you're not that scrawny bastard from South Carolina calling me at 12:30 AM, I'm going to send people to kill you."

"I'm not him. I just wanted you to know your package has arrived safely. Good night Doctor."

"I'll call you in the morning with details. Good night."

"Jennifer get up."

"What's the matter Even, aren't you feeling well?"

"I have something you need to take care of immediately."

"What is it, what is so important that you can't do it yourself?"

"I could take care of it myself, but it's better if you do it with me."

"What do you want even?"

"I have an erection, and I want to take advantage of you now."

"You took advantage of me a few hours ago."

"That was yesterday, this is today."

"I'm going to drill a hole in the wall for you."

"As long as you are on the other side of the hole it's fine with me. I'll be able to reach you."

"You and that monster of yours. When God made you, she must have turned the next nine boys into girls."

"You say the nicest things."

"Okay Doctor, but I am on top this time. You nearly drove me through the mattress last night."

"Maybe I should get a sheet of plywood and put it underneath the mattress."

"We have a sheet of plywood underneath the mattress. You've probably turned it into sawdust."

"I'll check it Saturday. If it needs replacing, I'll show it to Gordon to see if he can come up with something better to replace it with."

"Why not show it to Holden, he's younger."

"The closer we get to launching date, the moodier Gordon gets. Even with his last invention, he was only happy for a few days, and then returned to sulking at work. I'm trying to keep him busy, without making him feel he's doing busy work, but there is not that much more to do. It would be nice if he met someone at the wedding Saturday, but I doubt it.

"Alright Even let's get down to business, how do you want me this morning: cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, or linear cowgirl?"

"I love when I can suck on your toes, while you're fucking me Jen. You look like a teenage gymnast doing a split and riding my cock at the same time."

"Your wish is my command, but control yourself. I don't want that monster of yours in my stomach."

"Would I do that to you?"

"Would I shove my fist up your ass, and pull your heart out if you did?"

"Yes you would."

"Then you have your answer dear. Help me climb on board this fucking thing."

"Aptly named dear."

"Why is our fighting always like foreplay? I am always wet and ready for you."

"It's very easy dear. You are always horny, just like me."

"God, you are big. Are you taking Dick supplements?"

"Do you think I should?"

"If you want to kill me, go ahead."

"You need a pedicure dear. You are nails are chipping."

"You have more than 8 inches of your cock in my pussy, and you're worried about my nails? Give me a break Even, and pay attention to what's going on."

"I am dear; I'm sucking on your toes."

Jennifer heard music coming from Gordon's room.

"We've awoken our son dear."

"We must tell him to go to sleep with his earbuds in, so he can listen to String Theory Projections, instead of us."

"I don't believe strings are his problem."

"Payne has her head up her ass and locked. There's nothing we can do about it yet."

"Oh fuck, Even, I'm getting ready to cum."

"Squeeze me tight, and I'll cum with you."

"Squeeze you tight? I can barely move with you in there."

"You are so easy Jennifer, and so lovely."

"Fuck You Even, I am cuming."

"Hold on for a while Jen, I'm not ready."

"That's too bad Even, because I am."

"If you cum before I'm ready, I'm going to spank you."

Gordon yelled, "Spank her dad, I'm next."

"Put your earbuds in, I'm going to strangle your father."

"I won't be able to hear that mom. I'd rather hear him spank you. It's my evenings entertainment."

"I'm going to poison you in the morning Gordon, leave us alone."

"Yes mommy."

"Do you see what a horrible effect you've had on my son?"

"Did he keep your mind off cuming?"

"Yes he did."

"I love that boy."

"It's not going to last forever Even, so get a move on it."

"Is that a romantic thing to say to your husband, while we're making love?"

"I'm getting ready to cum again. I don't care if you are in Wyoming; I'm going to do it without you this time."

"Tell me when babe, I'm ready."

"A few more seconds, here it comes Even. Here it comes, if you get any bigger you going to split me in half. Now, now Even here it is."

As soon as Jennifer started to scream, I moved my hips and forced her onto her back. She felt her muscles spasm, her ovaries quake and she screamed as her orgasm hit her hard.

Seconds later she felt her insides being bathe by my sperm, and she started screaming again as a second orgasm overpowered her completely. Her third scream had nothing to do with sex.

"You bastard I'm going to have to change the sheets again dammit. When are you going to learn to cum just a little bit instead of flooding me, and everything around me? Every time you get near me I have to wash a load of sheets the next day"

"You will not have to change the sheets tonight dear, and you will sleep in a dry spot."

"There is no dry area in the middle of the bed."

"There is one." He hoisted her up onto his chest, and covered her. 

"Thank you darling." She slept very well for the rest of the night.

************************************

(Friday 4:45 AM)

The Schneider 767 pulled up in front of the gate and it was immediately surrounded by police and customs vehicles.

Dycke said, "Oh no, not again. Everyone stay in your seats, we are about to be searched again."

Customs agents boarded the aircraft. "Good morning Mister Schneider, do you have anything to declare?"

"No we don't, but feel free to check the airplane just like the Swedes did before we left. Why don't you just use a Geiger counter to see if we have any radioactive material on-board? That's what they accused us of trying to smuggle out of their country. I can personally guarantee you; we have not done anything illegal, while we were in Sweden."

"I would love to Mister Schneider, but three Swedish ministers swore under oath that you have stolen that material, and smuggled it out of the country."

"Okay, how do you want to work it? My people are exhausted from the long flight. Do you want to open their luggage, check it for the 20 pounds of material we are supposed to have stolen, and let them go home one at a time? Or do you want to weigh each one, and then let them go home."

"We are going to have to open each one and check it. Then we can let that person go."

"Fine, I'll send my people outside to identify their luggage. I will stay inside the aircraft until you're finished."

30 minutes later, all the people that were on the aircraft were on their way home. The only piece of luggage left was Dycke's and they checked his thoroughly.

Other agents went through the aircraft with a fine toothcomb. They had handheld Geiger counter's and they checked everywhere. They went through the spaces underneath, and above the flight deck, and found nothing. They checked the wheel wells, and the septic tanks, and still came up empty.

The lead customs agent said, "Mister Schneider, I've known you, and worked with your company for almost 15 years. When you've had something to declare, you have always declared it. I don't know what happened over in Sweden, but if I were you, I would get my lawyer's ready to sue someone over there for defamation of character."

"Thank you very much, but right now all I want you to do is contact the Swedish authorities and tell them exactly what you did here, and tell them we had no contraband on this aircraft. They checked it before we left, and you checked it when we arrived. Those three ministers are angry with me, because I didn't offer them a bribe to get the material I needed. I don't work that way. I'm going home now to get some sleep. I have to be at the factory early in the morning to see if we can find another metal to use besides the one we wanted."

"Good night Mister Schneider, sleep well."

"Thank you, I'm sure it will."

************

Dycke climbed into the back of the SUV and told Tom to take him directly to the factory.

"Boss you need some sleep, before Doctor Luck calls you."

"Call the factory Lucas. Ask them to set up a bed for me in a quiet area so I can get some sleep. Then call Fiona, and tell her she is to be at the factory at 9 AM."

"Boss, I would rather take a gun and shoot myself then call Fiona at 6:00 AM."

"Why is everyone so afraid of Fiona? She's a pussycat."

"She's a pussycat, with nine inch nails. Don't you remember you fired her?"

"I don't remember firing her."

"Boss you never forget anything, regardless of how insignificant it is."

"Call the factory and give them my instructions. Then give me your phone, and I'll call Fiona."

"Thank you boss."

*****************

Dycke punched in her number, and Bob answered.

"Yes."

"Give her the phone."

"She's going to shoot you."

"No she won't."

"What the fuck do you want?"

"You are to be at the factory at 9 AM. If you yell at me again, I will put you on the floor in seven seconds, instead of eight."

"I am free of you at last, you obnoxious bastard. I have enough money to retire in style, for the rest of my life."

"Fiona, do you know how much I love, and respect you?"

"Dycke, do you know how much you get on my nerves when you are like this?"

"How often am I like this Fiona? How often does my personal life interfere with my professional life? I never interfere with you, and your handling of my businesses. How many CEOs can say that to their chief financial officer, and their right-hand woman? It would take four people to replace you, and I would not trust any of them, the way I trust you. Do you realize I didn't fire you yesterday?"

"Yes you did. You fired me in front of 40 people, and you did it in writing."

"One day you are going to read your contract Fiona."

"What did you do to me this time Dycke?"

"You didn't sign the paper in front of everyone, so it's void."

"I swear to God Dycke, I'm going to kill you."

"It's not my fault you didn't read the contract. In three years when this one runs out, I'm going to give you a choice; you can work without a contract so you can quit any time, and any day you want, or you can work with a contract, like you have now, but you must read it first."

"Do I have to tell you which one I'm going to take?"

"I want you to take the one you feel most comfortable with. I don't want you to feel trapped. I know you have enough money to retire, and you can always sell your building, and become independently wealthy. Now get your ass out of bed, take your shower, do you girly things, and get your ass to the factory by 9 AM."

"I hate you Dycke."

"I love you Fiona, I have since the first moment I saw you."

"Bastard."

"You know both my parents, how can you possibly say that to me?"

"Fuck off; I have to take a shower."

"Take one with Bob; he will settle your nerves."

"I'll be late."

"I'll forgive you."

"Your pain in the ass Dycke."

"That's Bob's problem, not mine."

"I'll see you at the factory, and then I'll kill you."

"It was heartwarming to talk to you Fiona."

"Go to hell Dycke."

"I'll forgive you for being late, but not too late."

*****************

"Get out of bed Bob I have to take a shower."

"How does your taking a shower effect me?"

"Dycke said you would settle my nerves."

"I thought you had to be at the factory at 9 o'clock."

"Dycke said if I took a shower with you, he would forgive me for being late."

"You have a wonderful boss."

"Don't ever say that to me, I'm going to kill him one day."

"He's in the same unfortunate group I am. You always say you're going to kill me one day."

"Get your ass out of bed and get into the shower. I need you to calm my nerves."

"Aren't you happy the kids are out of the house? You can scream as loud as you want."

"Don't pat yourself on the back before it happens."

"Have I ever let you down?"

"No."

"Then go to the bathroom, start the shower, and begin thinking about what you want me to do. I'll be right behind you. Maybe I'll be in your behind soon afterwards."

"You are a perverted bastard."

"I am your perverted bastard. Now do what I told you to do, and get ready for me."

"You were always bossy. It was one of the things I hated about you."

"How late do you want to be for work?"

"I'm going, I'm going."

*********************

"It's 10:30 Fiona, where the hell have you been?"

"It took Bob a long time to unfrazzle my nerves."

"Do you want me to set up an appointment with Doctor Russell for you?"

"No, I prefer the way Bob does it."

"I can understand your feelings about doing it Bob's way. However, you are going to have to start at 6 o'clock, instead of 7 o'clock, so you can be to work on time."

"I've just got off the phone with Even, and this is what I need. You are not to tell anyone what he's doing. This is between you and me. His family group has found a way to send messages back to Earth faster than the speed of light. When I told him it's impossible, he laughed at me, and asked me why I went to Sweden to get Vanadium. It was the missing link in their formula.

Dycke uncovered his desk and showed Fiona what they had to build. She looked at it in awe, but did not understand anything that was on the diagram.

"What am I looking at boss?"

"You are looking at the future of space communication. Do you remember when our people were on the moon, there was always a delay between the time they spoke, and the time it was received here on earth?"

"Yes, but it was only for a half second or so."

"Now think of how long it would take for communications between Mars and Earth. The moon is only 239,000 miles from here. Mars is 140 million miles away. The speed of light is 16,104,000,000 miles per day. That's 186,000,000 miles per second.

Even's little group believes they can bring the speed of communications up to four times the speed of light. That's 744,000,000 miles per second. This will make communication between Mars (140 Million miles away) and the Earth instantaneous."

"How hard is it going to be to build these things, and how big are they going to be?"

"Our engineers are still sleeping off yesterday's flight. They will be in later today. I would give a rough estimate of about seven feet long, four feet in diameter, and with four, self sealing, interior chambers."

"It looks like it's going to be a bitch to make here. How are they going to make them in space?"

"That's a question I will ask the engineers, when they get here. Even won't have enough room in the spacecraft to carry 16 of them on the Good Luck 1. That's why he only wants six assembled, and parts for 10 more. Heaven knows he will have enough time to assemble each one before firing them off towards Earth."

"How are you going to test this thing?"

"We can't, and he knows it. He can only try it when he is in space."

"Can we use the vacuum chamber at the Kennedy?"

"It's a good thought, but it would tip Even's hand, and he wouldn't want that to happen."

"I hate giving him something untested."

"I agree, but this time I have no choice. Have you had breakfast?"

"No, I got laid instead."

"Good, neither did I, but I didn't get laid. Let's go to the cafeteria and have something to eat. I'm starving."

"You are going to eat?"

"Yes, Doctor Russell really helped me. We were able to talk, uninterrupted, for the whole trip home. He's moving to Charleston, on a $6 million a year retainer."

"Why $6 million, why not 5 or 10?"

"It was the number on his jersey."

"Of course, you knew that without asking him."

"Yes I did."

"May I how you knew that information?"

"I was watching a basketball game, and during a time out they showed all the retired jerseys of the Boston Celtics players. Doctor Russell was one of them, and his jersey was number 6."

"I totally hate you Dycke."

"Would you like me to tell you the numbers of all the other retired players in the history of the Boston Celtics?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 31



"No thank you, it would spoil my appetite."

"I don't want to do that. You're getting too thin. When was the last time you had a physical?"

"You're not my husband, so don't start that with me."

"You're absolutely correct; I'm not your husband. I am your employer, and I demand to know when you took your last physical."

"It was a little bit more than two and half years ago."

"Your contract demands you have a complete physical once every year. I will have my secretary schedule a completely invasive physical for you by next Friday. You will be there, even if you have to be gagged, blindfolded handcuffed, and carried to the hospital to be on time."

"Your pain in the ass Dycke."

"I keep telling you that's Bob's job. I don't want to lose you. I will do anything in my power to make sure you stay with my corporation, until you really wish to leave. 'Don't say it Fiona.' I own you for three more years."

"I thought it was two."

"I changed my mind."

"I'm going to read that damn contract."

"Don't you think it's about time?"

"Yes I guess it is."

"It's the same contract you signed since the day you became Chief Financial Officer. Not one word has been changed in the last 25 years. The only thing that has changed is your salary."

"You mean to say I haven't looked at my contract in 25 years?"

"Only you would know the answer to that question Fiona. Let's eat before the engineers and scientists get here to look at Even's design specifications."

************************

(Friday 10 AM)

"Colonel Canyon, this is Maximilian, the chef at the Hyatt Hotel."

"Yes Maximilian, you haven't run into a problem, have you?"

"Absolutely not Colonel, I should always have problems like this. I have just spoken with the future Mrs. Finch. I asked her what type cake and fillings she would like. She is so thrilled that Mister and Mrs. Zabo are attending her wedding she deferred that decision to them. Would you be able to ascertain their preferences, because we are going to start preparations for it today?"

"I see what you mean about a happy problem Maximilian. I will call you back in 15 minutes with your answer."

"That would be wonderful Colonel. Thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to speak with me."

************************

152. Faster Than Light

By 11:45 AM, all the scientists, and engineers were accounted for, and in the soundproof meeting room, awaiting instructions from Dycke. He astounded them, when he walked into the room and had pieces of paper handed to everyone. Upon signing up with the corporation, they all had to sign nondisclosure agreements. The paper handed out this morning was another one. This nondisclosure agreement was the most severe they had ever read. Basically, if they broke any tenant of this NDA their lives, freedom, careers, and family lives were over.

Dycke called the meeting to order.

"Those of you who do not want to sign this nondisclosure agreement must leave the room now. You are still employed by my company, but you will have nothing to do with this project. Those of you, who do sign it, will never be allowed to discuss it. I repeat, "You will never be allowed to discuss it. The terms of this NDA will be enforced rigidly to each letter in the contract."

"You now have 60 seconds to sign contract, or use that same 60 seconds to leave the room."

"Dycke can you tell us anything about this project?"

"Yes, we won't know if it works, until Doctor Luck passes Mars. If it does work, and your name is attached to it, they will live on in history longer than the pyramids."

One scientist said, "He's done something with communications again, hasn't he?"

"He's promised to go four times faster than the speed of light in his spacecraft. Maybe he's found a way to go faster?"

"Ladies, gentlemen, your time is up. Sign the NDA or get out of the room."

Some people stood up and looked at their peers, who were signing the documents. They started walking towards the rooms exit. The thought of losing everything they had ever earned was paramount in their minds, because of their families. As they reached the door, and opened it, they looked over their shoulders, and saw their peers looking back at them.

One of them said, "Oh fuck it!" She took out her pen, signed the document, walked up to Dycke, and told him this better be good.

Dycke kissed her on the head, and told her she's going to have to be very fast to keep up with it.

"Bring all the documents to me Cheryl. I will witness them, and you will notarize them. As soon as you are done, leave us, make 10 copies of each, scan the originals into the computer, and put them in the high-security safe. Place a copy in everyone's mailbox. Send a copy of each to legal, and go to lunch. Be back in the office by 12 PM."

Dycke raised his arms to protect himself from whatever was within Cheryl's reach.

When nothing hit him, he peaked. She was smiling at him. "It's nice to have you back boss."

"I'm not there yet Cheryl, but I'll get there."

As Cheryl left the room, and the door was locked, the air was so filled with electricity you could feel it getting ready to snap.

"Now for the moment you've been waiting for, what has Even Luck come up with this time? What magic do we have to perform to make it happen? Ladies, gentlemen, Even knows that his spacecraft is going to move faster than light. He says that so easily he feels it's a given fact. His oldest boy has proven that nuclear fusion does not have to take billions of watts of microwave energy to become a feasible source of limitless power. The young man was 15 years old when he made the announcement, and he made all of us feel like dunces. He made the discovery when he was 14 years old. I don't want to have to go through the list of things the Luck family has managed to do in less than 10 years, but this one is going to blow your mind.

I'm going to ask you a very simple question, "Do you believe Light can be made to move faster than Light?"

"You can't touch light Dycke. How can you possibly move something you can't touch?"

Dycke asked, "Can you touch the wind? Can you capture it in a jar?"

"You can feel it, but you can't capture it in a jar."

"What happens when you deflect a steady wind, into corridors of decreasing size?"

"The wind amplifies in speed."

"In other words, you can take a 30 mile an hour wind, at one end of a tunnel, and at the other end of that same tunnel it can come out at 200 miles per hour. Why?"

"Yes, because your compressing the air into a tighter space."

"Guess what Doctor Even Luck and his family have done with Light?"

"Bullshit, it can't be done to something you cannot feel."

"That is the reason I told you at the beginning, we won't know if it works, until the Good Luck 1 passes Mars. The Good Luck 1 will be transmitting from every instrument on board to Earth in real time. The normal time Curiosity takes to contact earth is 13 minutes 48 seconds. The same holds true on Even's spacecraft.

When they pass Mars, they will fire one of these projectiles towards Earth. It will be transmitting immediately, and continuously from the time of ignition. If his new invention works, it will be heard instantaneously."

"Dycke with all deference to the good Doctor, he's off this fucking rocker."

"I have $10 that says you're wrong. Does anybody want to bet against me? Come on guys and girls I have to be wrong sometime. This is as 'way out' an idea any of us has ever heard of. This is so far out of left field; they had to move the bleachers. Wait a minute, I haven't shown you the blueprint yet."

Dycke turned on the overhead projector, and the blueprint filled the entire wall behind him. He moved so he was not blocking any of it. Before any of his experts could say a word, he filled in, "No, it is not upside down."

His experts started talking to one another in tones that were much more subdued.

"I know he's not asking us for it Dycke, so I shouldn't be concerned right? Where is he getting the antimatter?"

"I like the way you phrased the first part of your question Harvey. Why don't we leave it at that if you don't mind? Let's just build the containment units for it, and if we fall through a crack in the space time continuum, we will know why, and who did it."

"Would you tell our magnet supplier to send us the best magnets he makes boss. We don't want any cheapies for this flight."

"You don't want secondhand magnets for my dear friend the Doctor?"

"I think we would all agree to forgo lunch, rather than have a defective magnet on one of these containment units."

***********************

"Okay, you've had two hours to look at this thing, can it be done by December 23."

Naomi said, "If we don't have to test it, our part can be done in three weeks. I won't be comfortable with it, but it will be done."

"What would make you comfortable?"

"The impossible. Getting it up into space and firing it off. I'm not talking about capturing the light, or finding out where he is getting the antimatter, I just want to make sure the propulsion unit's work. They won't work unless they are in outer space, because they are not air breathers. The tiny one, in the back, that uses lasers and the Vanadium would be disrupted by a one mile per hour wind."

"Go to work, and get this thing done. I'll try to make the impossible possible, if it's at all possible."

"Is it really possible to make the impossible possibly possible?"

"It's impossible to tell if it's possible."

*****************

"Sitting on your ass Maximilian?"

"Chef Meltzer, what an honor. Please be seated, may I get you anything?"

"A bottle of cold water please."

"Yes chef."

"Maximilian, this is your kitchen, you are in command. You are not to treat me any differently than you would any senior chef. I want to watch how the other chef's work together. Most of them won't know me, but this is the way I like to judge who moves up, and who moves out."

"As you wish chef, but how am I to refer to you?"

"Call me by my middle name, Roland."

"Very well Roland, at our meeting tomorrow morning I will tell everyone that you will be floating around helping anyone who has a problem. How does that suit you?"

"That will be just fine Maximilian."

"We have just received the order for the wedding cake, so that is being taken care of now. All the food trucks are in; I have just sent one of my men to buy more fruit. I am waiting for more linen's to come in from Houston. When this evening's rush is over, all the linens will be rushed through the laundry and by 10 o'clock tomorrow morning everything will be ready to go. I will inspect each server, change that, now that you're here, we can share that duty.

We will inspect each server from shoes to nails making sure everyone is appropriately attired. We will have one of the staff barbers on call. Any person who is not appropriately groomed for tomorrow's ceremony will have a buzz cut, or he will go home. Nothing is going to go wrong tomorrow with Mister Zabo sitting at the main table. I have even asked for additional police to be stationed in the hallways leading to the main banquet facility."

"Isn't that overdoing it just a little bit Maximilian?"

"In our day and age sir, all it takes is one lunatic, and your entire life is ruined."

"Your point is well taken Maximilian. I'm going up to my room, and relax I will be down later."

"I will be here chef, I guarantee it."

******************

(3 PM CST)

"No."

"You are a narrow minded son of a bitch."

"You are just finding this out now?"

"Change your mind, or I won't make them."

"Your bluffing."

"My people are worried. What happens if it blows up?"

"Maybe we should put a timer delay on the ignition sequence."

"Gee whiz, you are willing to compromise."

"I will not take my ship into space to test one of these devices. We would have to travel to Mars, send a signal, and return, for the sake of one test. I can't do that because we don't have the water in the exterior shell. We would have no defense against radiation and gamma rays. We would all perish, and you would lose the only hope you have of keeping Payne with you, and happy."

"Do you know how angry I am with you Even, when you are right?"

"Probably as upset as I am with you when you are correct Dycke."

"None of my engineers would take my $10 bet that this thing of yours was not going to work."

"You are only going to lose one bet my friend, and that is on Christmas Day. I give you my word on it."

"I'm bringing along my psychiatrist as an expert witness to testify it reaches your knee."

"I knew you were crazy all these years."

"No one has ever called me 'crazy' for inventing all these off-the-wall ideas of yours."

"I guess that's why I'm leaving this planet in your capable hands, and I'm going out to screw up our universe."

"If anyone could do it to our universe Even, it definitely would be you. Would you do me a favor?"

"If I can, I'll give it a try."

"Come back to us in 30 or 40 years, and tell us what you've seen."

"That would be completely up to the crew Dycke. I won't be around. I've told you that already. Teddy will be in command of the spacecraft, and many things will have to be taken into consideration before a decision like that is made."

"I understand. It would really piss me off anyhow, if you came back looking, and feeling younger than I was at the time. I would have to kill you."

"Get your ass up off the floor, call your psychiatrist, and get to work Dycke. You're wasting my time. My team is in the process of developing a way to slow down the fuel consumption rate of our Sun, while keeping the temperature and speed ratios at the same level."

"Go fuck yourself Even. My psychiatrist is still up in Boston closing up his affairs. I am not laying down on the floor, because my time with him helped me a great deal. I would bet everything I have, except for Payne, that you are whistling out of both sides of your mouth."

"Have your lawyers start drawing up the papers, and put the titles in the names of Holden and Richard Luck."

"I will start that process, the day after it is proven your work has been successful. However, this time you are so full of shit, your eyes are turning black."

"We have five weeks to accomplish this task. Delicious has been looking for something to sink her teeth into, besides Gray for a long time. This should be exactly what she's been looking for. She may finish more than a week early, with Newton, and Teddy helping her. "

"Did I mention, during this conversation, that I hate you Even."

"No Dycke, I believe you left that out of this conversation."

"Oh good, I hate you Even Luck. I was a normal rational human being for all the years of my life, before I met you. Now I have to have a psychiatrist on staff because of you.

I hate you Even Luck. However, I don't think I would be having half as much fun at work without you."

"What a touching sentiment that was. Go to work dammit. Every minute we are on the phone, means a minute wasted on my project."

"Do you really think I'm smart enough to build one of those things Even? That's why I have scientists and engineers working for me."

"You should never try to bullshit a bullshitter. You take one look at those plans, and you know where every nut and bolt goes. You just want to play with your own toys, just like I do."

"I'm going to hang up now. You are distressing me."

"Distressing, is that a new word you learned from your psychiatrist?"

"Yes it is. He said I should use it every time I use the words 'Even Luck.' It is distressing to talk to you. Goodbye Dycke."

"Goodbye Even."

They both laughed, and turned off their phones.

************

Friday Noon

Adam Schiff was in the plumbing simulator, when something began tickling his ear. He brushed it away to continue working on the problem he was trying to resolve. The tickling came back, and he brushed it away again.

The next time it happened, someone was licking his earlobe.

"I didn't know you swung that way Benny."

Laura asked, "Is Benny prettier than I am?"

Adam nearly knocked himself unconscious, when he raised his head, and hit a 12-inch PVC pipe. As his head cleared, he turned to see Laura smiling at him.

"If you are going to do that every time I come to see you at work, I think you should wear a hard hat."

"Very funny baby, why are you here? You never come to see me at work."

"What happens when your shower doesn't work, and you need a plumber?"

"You leave the house to find your friendly neighborhood plumber. What happened to our shower?"

"If I knew, why would I be here talking to you? Of course, if you want me to call another plumber, I will happily do so."

"Is he as expensive as I am?"

"Who said it was a he? I could always try a female plumber."

"You are getting ready to test the waters on the other side of the sexual venue?"

"If my friendly local plumber doesn't fix my shower, I may expand my horizons."

"Can I use my camera as you cavort around?"

"I believe that falls within the rules, don't you?"

"Let's get out of here Laura, you're killing me."

"I think that was the object of this discussion."

"You have succeeded admirably. I will tell my boss I'm taking the afternoon off."

"You don't have to; I already told him you are leaving for the day."

"You are one confident, sexy lady Laura. I love you."

"I believe I can put up with you for a lifetime."

"As of December 25, and you say the words 'I DO', you will have to put up with me for a lifetime, so get use to it. I just realized this is the first time I've seen you in clothes in months. How does it feel?"

"Minimalistic. I'm not wearing anything under this dress."

"Let's get out of here. I need a cold shower."

"You will have to fix it first. It's not working."

"It will be working, and fast."

************************

The SUV's raced them home, and as they turned into his community, he knew there was nothing he could do to fix his shower. The Cities backhoe's and dump trucks were lined up digging through part of the street where a water main burst. He had his driver pullover so he could speak to the city engineer.

"Hi Brian, how bad is it?"

"It's not a disaster, but it's damn close. The main cracked supplying three feeder lines, including your development. Everyone for a mile is without water. This is going to take 6 to 8 hours to fix. I hope it never happens again. The mayor is all over my bosses ass, and I can feel where my bosses teeth bit me."

"Can I make a suggestion?"

"I'm all ears Adam."

"I've been doing plumbing on the spaceship. The plumbing is like nothing you've ever seen before, because it has to work without gravity, and without pressure. Since you tearing up the street anyhow, why not try this. Instead of using one main coupling for all the communities, why not use four couplings separated by 12 feet. Each one will be serving an individual community's on either side of the street. This way if one coupling goes bad, that's the only one you have to replace. You shut down the feeder valve serving that coupling, leaving the other communities with pressurized water. You repair that broken coupling in less than two hours, and you're good to go. Only one community has to boil water until it has been tested clear of contaminants."

"Are you looking for my job?"

"No, I'm getting married December 25. Then I am leaving on the spaceship, the same day. I worked my ass off to get that plumbing job, and it's just something I learned."

"Why 12 feet apart?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



Note: All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative rather than just for the sake of sex itself. This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me along the way. I hope you will stay with me during this journey until it reaches its inevitable conclusion.



153. The Countdown Begins 

(Post-Thanksgiving – 26 days to launch)

Babies created a new problem for us to solve, and I couldn't complain because I was one of the culprits. I ordered Doctor Finch to quit his job at the hospital, and join our team in the main building. He was put in charge of getting us all the needs for babies, not just for now, but also for the next twenty years, in freeze-dried or powdered forms. His purview did not include just food, but ways for them to sleep, without using cribs, exercise equipment, changing tables, and one-piece clothing. His major problem was time, and it was extremely limited.

Initially his eyes rolled back in his head, until he realized there would be a maximum of thirty-five women who were going to be on the trip with us. He made up a list of forty-three questions, everything from medical equipment to baby diapers and asked me for some computer time.

"How much time do you need Doctor?"

"About ninety minutes, maybe a little bit more."

I smiled at him. "How would you like all of this done and half a second?"

"I'm not going to ask you how you are going to do it Even, I just want to see it done."

I took him to my station and introduced them to my Exascale computer. I scanned his questions in, and asked him to push the Begin button.

His finger had not released the button, when the printer started screaming the answers.

I took his questions off the scanner, reached down, and pulled almost 50 sheets of paper out of my bin.

Finch joked with me as he was reading the first medical answer.

"I think it missed a period Doctor Luck. What the hell is that thing?"

"It's a computer that will help us from running into any space rocks while we fly through the Kuiper belt, and into outer space. If you realize the speed we will be flying at, even this computer may not be fast enough to keep us out of harm's way. Our people at the University of Chicago may have an update on the computer chips before we leave. If they do, the speed of this computer will be quadrupled, and we will need it, if we decide to fly through a White Hole."

"If I start asking you questions like what is a White Hole, we will be here all day and into next year."

"It has taken us over eight years to get to this point Doctor, and you have just stepped into the building. You have a long learning curve ahead of you before you step onto the bridge and know what you're doing."

"If you don't mind, I'll stay in the infirmary. I'll be more comfortable down there."

"The answer to that is, "No." You are going to be training new doctors. Our Doctor is going to be training as a flight engineer, and then eventually as a captain. We only have a limited amount of people, and we are going to die off a little at a time. Everyone must have multiple skills drilled into them. We are going to have only one plumber onboard. He is going to have to train many more in that skill. If he was to die, either naturally or by accident and no one else knew what to do, we would all be up shits creek."

"Very well put Captain. I guess there will be no leisure time on board this flight."

"There will be plenty of leisure time, but there will be a lot of learning going on at the same time. We don't want boredom to set in among the people flying with us. We want everyone happy and productive. Everyone flying with us is very well educated, and motivated. No one came just look out the windows, which we have none. There are computer screens everywhere so they can see the stars, but that will get old quickly. People are used to working. Gordon would go crazy sitting at his station on the flight deck all day knowing the computer was doing everything, and all he was doing was watching dials and lights. He wants to invent, he wants to use his brain, just as you and I do. You trained to be a plastic surgeon. You better retrain yourself to be a brain surgeon Doctor, because on this ship the two major injuries you are going to deal with are to the head and spine."

"I'm going to need a lot of books to study from in order to do that Doctor Luck."

"Books are not allowed on this ship because they are flammable. Anything and everything you want to know about the human body is stored in our computers. 

We are quadruple redundant. If our number one computer goes off-line, the number two computer comes online instantly. It is always running, and feeding off the primary computer. It knows exactly what is going on, so there is no shortfall anywhere in the ship. If there is a fault in the number one computer, and it goes off-line, the number two takes control automatically. Computer number three computer comes online. It uploads everything that number two is doing and adds it to its memory banks. The number four moves into the number three position goes into the ready position, and does a self-diagnostic to make sure it's working properly. When the number one computer is fixed, it goes into the number four, or rest position and does a self-diagnostic to see if anything else needs to be repaired that wasn't caught by our technicians. 

These Exascale Computers won't be available to the public for a generation. At that time, our people at the Argonne National Laboratory's at the University of Chicago will have come up with something so far advanced, these computers will be obsolete."

"Sounds like an amazing set up Doctor."

"It is Doctor; I set it up that way."

***********************

William Zabo Junior, and Patrick Zabo arrived in Temple, under heavy security. I had never seen William cry openly, but he did when he saw his namesake. He purposely distanced himself from his oldest son for fear of retribution some people might take out on him, and then sent Patrick to him because of the same fears.

Jemma held him for what seemed like an hour, because of the little time she was able to spend with him as he grew into a man. She was very proud of what he had become, and how much he resembled his father.

Jemma smacked her 38-year-old son on the arm and asked him, "Why aren't you married, I'm waiting for grandchildren."

Young William replied, "I've been looking for someone as beautiful as my mother, and everyone I've dated has been found wanting."

"Don't you lie to me, you're like your father. You have 1000 women chasing you, and you haven't decided which one you like best."

"I wish I had the time for that problem mom. My business takes up eight days of my week, and I rarely have the time to rest."

"I believe that will end while you are here. I think that's why your father recalled you, at least I hope so."

"I can't believe you're pregnant mom."

"You can't believe it, how about me? I'm in my middle 60s, and when the doctor told me I was pregnant, I knew it was a joke until she showed me the heartbeat on the monitor. I wanted to kill your father, but neither of us thought it was possible because of our ages. Your dad is an amazing man, and you take after him."

"Thank you mom that is a great compliment coming from you."

"Where did Patrick disappear to?"

"He's over there, I'll get him."

"Mom would like to see you Pat."

"William, this is Newton. We were best friends before I went away."

"Newton, it's a pleasure meeting you."

"It's wonderful meeting you too William. It seems Patrick learned a lot while he was away."

"When you're in a different country, you have to learn their ways. If you don't, you're like a little fish in a tank full of sharks."

"That doesn't sound like fun."

"It's not, that's why you have to learn fast, and be hard during your negotiations. If you're not, people will take advantage of you, even your friends. They will think you are soft, and they will not respect you. The Chinese people value tradition, and respect above all other things. I'm sorry we cannot talk longer, but I have to bring Patrick to his mother."

"Maybe we can continue talking later. I would like that."

"It will be fine with me Newton."

Patrick greeted his mother much like his brother did.

"I missed you so much mom. I don't know why they wouldn't let me call you more often."

"It was to keep you safe honey. There were people out there looking for you and your brother. China was the hardest place for them to get to you. If you used the telephone they could track you to within a mile or so of where you really were, and that would have made it easier for them to find you. Believe me I missed you as much as you missed me, and now believe it or not, you are going to have another brother or sister very soon."

"You're kidding, aren't you a little old to be pregnant?"

"Yes I am, but your father didn't think so, and here I go again."

"That is too much mom."

"Tell me about it, he makes me laugh all the time. Wait until you see the spaceship. It's finished, and it will take off on Christmas afternoon. We will watch it take off, and you will know that your father was very important in having that happen."

"How long have you been married to dad now?"

"We've been married for 43 years."

"Wow, that's a very long time. I read in the magazines we get in China that movie stars get married and divorced every other year."

"You're correct Patrick. They don't marry for love, as your father and I did. They marry for lust, and once that sex appeal wears off, they get a divorce and look for another pretty face to marry. They have enough money to do whatever they want to, and it keeps them in the public eye."

"Dad and you have a lot of money, why didn't you divorce?"

"When we married, we were deeply in love, and still are. I don't think our love for each other will ever die."

"You're damn right it won't die; look at that behind on your mother, there's not another one in the world like it."

"If your bones wouldn't break when I hit you, you would be laying on the floor. How dare you talk about me like that in front of our son?"

William Junior said, "I told you mom, I'm looking for a woman exactly like you, and that's one part of you I can't find."

"Junior, you're not too old to be spanked."

"Mom, I can outrun you."

"Do you see what you started William. I will take it out on you in bed tonight."

"Oh no, not that, anything but that."

"Liar."

"Why don't you take your sons to see the spacecraft tomorrow? I've seen it often enough. I'll start knitting booties."

"Mom, you know how to knit?"

"Not really, I just keep the knitting needles sharp so I can jab your father as he goes by me."

"I have the blood marks to prove it boys. Tomorrow when you come with me, I'll show you the next century, and the man who built it."

***********************

I received a call from William who asked me to meet him at the Good Luck with Richard, Holden, and if possible, Newton and Teddy the next morning at 10 AM. When he told me why I told him I would wear clean clothes.

He laughed, and said, "Don't you dare, I may not recognize you."

It seemed William always got the last word in our conversations."

At home that evening, William explained to his namesake that he was retiring from all his businesses, and that Junior was now in control of 80% of them. Jemma was in control of the other 20%. When the time came and Patrick came of age he was to receive 29% of Junior's major holdings. He wanted them to maintain a relationship as a corporate powerhouse. There was only one thing he demanded of his son. Whenever it came to pass that Even Luck's children began to build the new spacecraft, their Corporation would invest a minimum of $35 billion, or higher if the patents coming from it warranted more investments.

Junior balked at this request. "Dad space adventurism is a bottomless pit. You put money in and you never see it again."

"Junior come here and let me show you something."

William opened a large ledger and placed it on his desk. Junior sat beside him and waited for his father to explain what he was looking at.

"On day one I invested $20 billion. As you can see on the graph, at the beginning it was a straight line down for three years. Then we hit gold. You know of Even Luck's son, Gordon?"

"Of course, he was the 15-year-old who invented the process of nuclear fusion."

"As I said, we struck gold. After that, it seemed our scientists made breakthroughs week after week in patentable areas. We started withholding them from the public until we knew their real value. When top-tier companies from Germany, France, Austria and England came pounding on our door, the US companies could not sit on their hands any longer. They came pounding on our doors also. Look at the graph for the next year. It wiped out all our losses for the first three years. After that the graph never went down again. We had people begging to become part of our board of directors, but there are only 20 of us on the board, and we weren't letting go, because we knew what we had. In the past six years, since we broke even, my net worth has grown by $300 billion."

"Did you just say $300 billion dad. How are you hiding that from the government?"

"I'm not, I'm declaring every penny of it, through my 8604 corporations."

"Dad you are a sneaky bastard."

"I am not, I paid over $160 million in taxes on that money."

"Don't make me tell you how sorry I feel for you dad."

"It's not my loss, it's yours. That money was supposed to go to you."

"Now you are making me feel bad. I could have bought another yacht."

"I didn't know you had one."

"I don't."

"Back to business, in order to avoid death taxes, I have already signed over everything to you, and your mother. The attorneys will be here before Christmas for you to sign everything. The people you will meet here are as straight and honest as anyone you will meet in the world. They are scientist, and if you give them enough money to perform their science, they will make you more money than you have ever dreamed of. 

However, the two brightest ones, and the leaders of the next program, the Good Luck 2, are 11 and 6 years old. They have their guardians set up. One is an attorney, and the other is his wife. They are both wonderful people, but don't mess with the attorney, because you will lose. I don't care if you bring half of Wall Street's lawyers down here against him, you will lose. He will guard those boys with his life, because he promised Even Luck he would. He would stop a freight train if he had to in order to protect those boys.

The boys have already finished the engineering floor, and are working on the second floor of the spacecraft. It is nearly completed."

"How large is the second spacecraft going to be? I understand this one is relatively small."

"If you call six times the size of the Space Shuttle small, then Even's spaceship is small. Spaceship 2 is going to be 1000 feet in circumference."

"How large did you say?"

"Junior, you're going to have to have your hearing checked. There are a lot of things you are going to see and hear in the next few weeks that are going to astound you. You are going to have to listen carefully the first time. Spaceship 2 is going to be 1000 feet in circumference. It is estimated to take 10 years to build, and when it takes off, it will leave on a 10 year journey, and return. It will be carrying the first group of paying passengers. They will be mostly millionaires, because space travel is going to be expensive. There will also be a lottery for people who can't afford that amount of money, but they will have to prove they make less than a certain amount of money to enter the raffle. Everything is already in the planning stage except to know who is going to be the chief executive officer, the members of the board, and how many board members are going to be on it. This venture cost us $340 billion. Number 2 will probably come in in excess of $1 trillion because of its size.

However, look at it this way, we are launching our first ship December 25, with a minimum of 60 people on board. The government won't be sending anyone into deep space for minimum of four more years, and that is if there space launch system continues to go perfectly. They haven't even tested their rocket yet, and they are betting that it will work the first time, and every time thereafter. We know about the reliability of hydrogen/oxygen propelled rockets. We watched those people die in front of our eyes. It was horrifying. For their sake I hope it works, but they won't get off the ground until 2022. That's seven years from now. If they find one flaw, just one, you can add a year to that. Then they will send four people on a journey to Mars, which will take four years. Two years after they launch, we will be launching Spaceship 2, with 800 people on board, to the outer reaches of space. We will pass that vehicle before they get to Mars. We can even rescue them if they are in trouble."

"Why dad, why won't they listen to you?"

"We can sit here and talk for ages about why, but the simple case is, big companies own the Congress and the Senate. They will never let it happen, because we can do things much cheaper, and faster than they can."

I'm tired son, and Jemma has threatened me with my life. I'm going to bed before she realizes I'm missing. I'll see you early in the morning, and I will show you the Good Luck 1."

"Good night dad."

"Good night son. You turned into a fine young man. Make your brother into one also."

"I will."

**********************

The next morning we were all there waiting for them. The two Williams stepped out of the car and walked the leisurely towards us. Patrick on the other hand towards Newton.

Newton was horrified, and yelled, "Patrick stop."

It was too late, Patrick disappeared. William Junior raced to see what happened to his brother, and was amazed when he saw Newton jump and disappear also. Then he heard laughter coming from the bottom of the bear pit.

"I tried to warn you, but you didn't listen to me."

"What is this thing?"

"It's just something to stop criminals from getting to the spaceship."

"It's very soft."

William Senior said, "Are you having fun down there Patrick?"

"Yes dad, this is cool."

"Well I'm glad you didn't break your neck, but would you come up here so we can go inside the spacecraft please?"

The agents put a ladder down, and one at a time the boys climbed up. Junior backed up to give them space to brush off the sand, and beat sugar that clung to them, when Jim yelled, "Don't move."

Again, it was a half second too late. Junior's heels were over the edge of the bear trap behind him. He lost his balance, and fell into the bottom looking like a snow angel.

William looked down at him and asked, "Were you that jealous of your younger brother?"

Patrick pulled on his father's sleeve.

"Monkey see, monkey do dad."

Junior yelled up, "I'm never going to let you beat me in chess again."

"I was being easy on you letting you win every now and again."

"I'm going to give you such a beating when I get up there."

"Boys, if you're going to play in the sandbox all day let me know and I'll go sit in the shade."

Junior climbed up the ladder, and ruffled Patrick's hair. "I'm going to get you for that, just remember it."

Jim yelled, "No one moves without a guide."

We made it across with no further incidences, and the introductions began.

William started making them formally, and I ordered him to stop it.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



"This is your son, he doesn't call anyone Doctor or Missus. We are all on a first name basis. William, I am Even Luck. These are my sons, Gordon, Richard, and Holden. The young lady over there holding the gorgeous redhead, is my daughter, Delicious. The redhead is Teddy, and the man standing behind them is Grayson Thyme, we call him Gray. You already know Newton."

"It's a pleasure to meet you all finally. In his letters to me, you are all my father talks about. You may not be blood relatives, but you are family, and that's the way I feel right now. Thank you for greeting me that way.

Teddy was struggling and Delicious' arms so she put her down. Teddy walked over to young William and put her arms up. William picked her up and Teddy put both hands on his temples and closed her eyes.

She opened them, looked at him and smiled. "It you, you missing piece. Everything be okay for Space 2. No more problems, eight years on birthday."

I laughed, I couldn't help it. Junior looked at her in amazement, but didn't know what to think of her. Then Teddy continued.

"No married now. Meet girl, hair like me, when grandpa leaves. Marry her, three children, two girls like mommy, one boy like daddy."

Junior turned and handed Teddy to me. "Is she for real?"

"If I were you, I would start buying a diamond."

"Dad say something."

"Your mother said she wanted grandchildren, it looks like she's going to get them."

"Can I go back to China please, I was safer there."

Delicious said to Gray, "Another womanizer bites the dust."

Patrick asked, "Am I going to be your best man?"

"I'm not getting married. So get that out of your head."

I reached into my pocket opened my wallet and pulled out a $100 bill. "$100 on the redhead whoever she is."

Junior said, "I'll cover all the bets. I'm not getting married."

Senior said, "One thousand dollars on the redhead, whoever she is, and I'll pay for the wedding."

"I'm sorry William, $100 is the house rule."

"We're not in your house, are we?"

"You have me there."

Teddy asked, "Me money grandpa?"

"No you're too young to bet, but you can have them take you to the Creamy Cow."

"3 times?"

"Two hands, two times."

"Grandpa cheat Teddy again. Two hands, 2 feet, four times."

"You eat last two times with feet."

"You win, two times."

Junior asked, "What in God's name is a Creamy Cow?"

"It's her favorite ice cream store."

"Oh, I can live with that."

"You may as well get used to it, because you're going to be taking your fiancé there, until you moved to South Carolina."

"Why would I moved to South Carolina?"

"Schneider industries is why. They fabricated 60% of what you're looking at. They purchased the land for us to build spaceship 2 on without anyone noticing it. It's much easier for the suppliers of our nuclear engines to get them from North Carolina to South Carolina. Finally, and probably most important, it doesn't snow in South Carolina. There will be no weather-related delays in the building of the spaceship. You can control all your other companies from there, as Dycke does, and watch your spaceship project closely."

"Who's Dycke?"

"Dycke Schneider, the sixth richest man in the world, but he doesn't act that way, and you would never know it to see the way he lives. And before you ask who set forth third second and first, they are all on the board of directors of "The Deep Space Science Project."

"What's that?"

"Ask your father, he is the chief executive officer."

Junior turned to look at his father. 

"I think you're giving me a headache."

"Money doesn't grow on trees, it grows on opportunities. Your sister dropped this one in my lap."

"I have a sister?"

"Patricia Zabo Valentino is your sister."

"She and Harold Chase came up with the system to clean up our atmosphere."

"Yes she did, and she is on the board of directors."

"Should I ask what number she is?"

"I'm not sure she would want you to know. She lives quite modestly also."

"I would assume Harold Chase is on it also."

"Yes he is."

"You have quite an eclectic group on this board of yours."

"I was almost the last to join. I believed as you did that space adventurism is a bottomless pit. It took me quite a while to change my mind."

"Let's go inside, you have me salivating to see what the next generations will be missing if their governments don't open their eyes and see what opportunities are open to them."

"It's not the governments as much as it is private industry. Private industry wants the government to do the testing for them, and then they will reap the rewards. The rewards are right in front of them but they refused to look at it."

For the next 90 minutes I showed Williams around engineering, the bridge, the entertainment and eating area, the stasis units, the sleeping quarters, and the exercise area. Young William asked brilliant questions, and I answered each of them at length, because I knew he was thinking ahead to our next spacecraft.

When we returned to engineering he wanted to talk about the nuclear engine again. I called Gordon and had him do the lecture for me. He was at his best. When Junior asked who was going to take care of the next engine, Gordon replied that there would be for engines not one, and they would be considerably larger because of the size of the ship. If he wanted to know about them he would call his brother over to explain them.

Junior nodded, and Gordon asked Holden to join them.

When Holden arrived William Junior looked at Gordon and asked, "He designed the new nuclear engines?"

Holden didn't give Gordon a chance to answer. He said to William, "If there is anything in math that I don't know, it hasn't been invented yet. So if you have a question about my engines, ask me, or stop wasting my time."

I berated my son. "Holden, William Junior is our guest, and you will treat him appropriately. If you don't, there will be no dessert for two weeks."

As I listened to the threat in my head, I felt like an absolute moron.

William Junior said, "It's perfectly alright Even. The young man is correct. I have no knowledge of nuclear engines, and both he and his brother do. Holden if you would kindly explain to me the difference in both size and energy of your four engines, as opposed to Gordon's one engine, I would really consider it an honor to hear it."

It took Holden 15 minutes to explain the difference between Gordon's one engine, and the ones of his own design. Even though they were both nuclear fusion engines and would produce energy in the same manner, the way the energy would be managed, and distributed throughout the ship was completely different.

When his lecture was over Junior extended his hand, and Holden extended his and they shook. Young William said, "Now I understand why you are going to be the chief scientist, and I am going to be pushing papers from one side of my desk to the next."

Holden asked, "Have you ever seen Mr. Valentino's desk? "

"No I haven't had the pleasure."

"The papers on his desk are taller than I am."

"Holden, I don't think I want that man's job."

As we were leaving the spacecraft Junior asked, "Mr. Valentino is my sister's husband?"

"Yes he is. He is also our chief financial officer. In the last eight years we had been off by $.22, and we are audited by outside firms every six months. The period we were off, he and his staff worked Saturday and Sunday to find it. They never did, and he paid for the overtime himself."

"That man is anal."

"He graduated Penn with a 4.0 GPA. He graduated Wharton School of Business with a 4.0 GPA. He was number one in both undergraduate and graduate schools. He takes pride in his work, and as you put it, he is anal about other people's money, some of which is your father's, mine, and his."

*********************

Gordon was getting tired of speaking to Zoey in the early hours of the morning, and going to work groggy. He decided to end this charade, and without consulting anyone, he decided to start a war with Payne. He called Zoey at 10 o'clock in the morning, when he knew both she and Payne would be at home. Zoey answered the phone.

"Hello my love, how are you this morning?"

Zoey whispered, "Are you out of your fucking mind, she's twenty feet away from me."

"She is the reason I called. I want you to talk to me in normal tones. If she tells you to hang up, I want you to ask her how old you are. When she tells you you're eighteen years old, ask her if she's keeping you prisoner in your own home, because I'm recording this phone call. I want you to state your name, your age, your home address right now. Go ahead."

Zoey did as he requested, and then asked, "What do you want me to do now?"

"I want you to tell me loud and clear that you love me, and want to be with me forever. I want to know if it's the truth, because you know in twenty-six days I'm leaving the Earth and going into outer space for the rest of my life. I will never return to this planet, and if you want to be with me, neither will you."

"Gordon Luck, there is nothing more in this world that I want then to be with you for the rest of my life. I wish we could be married first, but if that can't happen, I will live with you as husband and wife. I have missed you so much I am empty without you."

Payne asked, "Who are you talking to Zoey?"

"I'm talking to Gordon Luck."

"Hang up that phone this instant."

"How old am I mother?"

"You are eighteen years old Zoey."

"Are you telling me who I can talk to and when?"

"Yes I am, now hang up that phone."

"Am I being held captive in my own home?"

"You are, until that boyfriend of yours leaves."

"Thank you mother, because this phone call is being recorded. You can expect the police here in a few moments. I'm not allowed to see my father. I am not allowed to see my fiancé. Why, because my mother, Payne Schneider, is holding me captive in my own home. Do it Gordon, do it right now."

"It's already done baby. I called the police on the house phone. They're calling your father to verify he has not been able to see you alone for over three months. They will be there in less than five minutes. Don't let your mother pull you out of the house. Go to your bedroom, lock your door, and block it with a piece of furniture."

Payne approached Zoey menacingly, but Zoey escaped her by throwing the phone, and hitting her in the chest. She ran to her room and followed Gordon's order. She locked the door in time to stop her mother from opening it. She pushed her dresser over, blocking the entrance completely. She sat down on her bed, listening to her mother pound on the door, while she screamed at her. She pulled a pillow around her middle and held it tightly as tears began to flow.

She yelled, "Stop it mom, you're out of your mind."

Payne screamed and hollered, at her daughter, for more than five minutes but could not gain access to her room.

When silence came, Zoey became frightened. She wondered what her mother was doing. She never gave up, especially in a matter as important to her as this was. Moments passed and Zoey heard movement at the sliding glass door to her room. She bolted to it and saw her mother using the key to open the lock. She tried to keep her mother from opening the door, but Payne was too strong.

"Okay mom, you are in my room, now what are you going to do?"

"We are leaving young woman. You are going to follow me, and we are leaving this place, until that miscreant of yours is gone."

"That miscreant of mine invented nuclear fusion. What have you invented? You've distanced yourself from my father, your two sons, both sets of my grandparents, and now me. Who's left for you mom? You're all alone. How does it feel?"

Payne pulled her gun from her pocket. "I'm not alone, I still have you, and I'm not giving you up."

"You gave me up, when you pulled me away from Gordon. You made my life feel like yours feels without dad. This all goes back to that night we came home, and you saw his broken paddle on the dining room table. You knew then that you had done something so terrible that it caused a split between the two of you. Something in your mind split that night, and you've never recovered from it. It's gotten worse every day. I pity you mom. I pity what your life has become. I'm going to leave, I'm going to walk out the front door, and leave you behind forever. I will never say the name of Payne Schneider again. She is no longer my mother; she is no longer my friend."

Zoey walked past her mother, and onto the balcony that overlooked Charleston Harbor. It was always her favorite view, but the site didn't affect her today.

From behind her Payne shouted, "Zoey stop or I will shoot you."

Zoey turned around and saw her mother pointing the weapon at her.

"I'll tell you what mom, I'm going to make this easy on you. I'm tired of fighting with you. I'm tired of all the shit you've been putting me through. You want to kill me? You want me dead? You want to keep me from Gordon and dad? You want me for yourself for the rest of your life; watch this."

She grabbed one of the poles that anchored their balcony to the roof of the building and pulled herself up onto the railing.

"You won't have to go to jail, because you shot and killed me. I'm going to jump. You can live in this apartment for the rest of your life, and know the exact spot where I jumped. You will be able to look down, and see where the grass has grown over the spot my body landed, or you can plant a tree there in your honor to show you won again. You will own me forever mother, not only in your demented mind, but also in your eyes as I fall twenty-nine floors to my death. Watch closely, because here I go.

Zoey looked towards the harbor once more. "It's such a beautiful site."

Payne screamed, "Zoey Please 'No'. Don't. You can go to Gordon."

"You just want me to get down, so you can keep me captive again. I don't believe you for one second mom; not for one damn second." 

Payne saw Zoey release her hand from the pole, shift her weight forward, and begin that inexorable movement forward, and down from the railing. 

Dycke jumped, grabbed his daughter around her legs out of midair, and pulled her back against the outside of the railing upside down. 

Tom and Willie grabbed Dycke's feet to keep him from going over the railing also, while Dycke held on to his daughter to save her life. Several other agents climbed over the railing, and reached for Zoey to pull her up from Dycke's tenuous grasp. Once they were both stabilized against the outside of the metal railing, Zoey looked at her father.

"Nice catch dad, I thought you weren't into sports."

Dycke replied, "If I had a free hand, I would paddle you where you are. I think you read Romeo and Juliet one too many times."

"I read Tristan and Isolde, dad. You don't have to put up with Shakespeare's Iambic Pentameter."

"How the heck did you fail English Literature?"

"I wouldn't fuck the teacher, so he failed me. It was a prerequisite for the girls to pass the course."

"That man is so fired."

"He's on the board of directors."

"I'll buy the fucking school, and put him in a wood chipper. I can do it too."

They were pulled up onto the balcony, and they hugged each other.

"How's mom?"

"How can you possibly be worried about your mother, when you just offered up your life to leave her, to leave all of us?"

"Sometimes stupid people do stupid things. On a scale of 1 to 10, I think I just broke the scale."

"I'll say you did. If you do it again, I won't let you marry Gordon."

"He called you?"

"The police called me. Gordon called me. Even called me, and I called Doctor Russell. All in all, I'd say I was on the phone a lot this morning. 

Doctor Russell should be here in less than an hour. His plane should be landing about now. I believe we are going to keep that man very busy."

"Check on mom please, I'm fine. The next time I do this I'll make sure I have feathers, a parachute or a net."

"I think you should call Gordon, he's a little bit anxious over the situation here. I don't think he believed it would go this far. Many things will get settled today. However, if I were you, I'd leave out the jumping part for now."

"I tell Gordon everything."

"Not this time little one, not unless you want to kill him, or him to kill you. I'll check on your mother."

Payne was lying on the ground, half in shock, and half in distress. Her gun was on the ground, a few feet away from her. Dycke picked it up and put it in his pocket. The police did not need to see it.

He sat down next to her, and pulled her into his arms.

"I should paddle the shit out of you for what you've done to our family."

"You can't paddle me. You broke yours."

"My old paddle broke. I had to order a new one made out of birch. It's in our closet."

"When you put the old paddle on the dining room table I thought you were leaving me, and I fell apart."

"What did I tell you when you made the decision not to let Zoey go with Gordon?"

"I don't remember."

"A photographic memory, without instant recall. What a waste."

"Don't start with me; I nearly lost my daughter, because I was out of my mind with jealousy. I may never get her back."

"Why did your daughter ask me to check on you if you are never going to get her back?"

"Tell me what you said to me."

"Nothing you do will ever change the way I feel about you."

"I don't feel that way about myself. I acted terribly."

"You certainly did mom. I don't want any complaints about my driving from you ever again."

"I am so sorry Zoey. I never thought you would do that. I don't know what got into me, and I don't have enough time to make it up to you."

"Can we invite Gordon here, I want to get married."

"We can send a plane for him today if you like."

"I think we can arrange a wedding for you. It sort of changes my plans for the Bishop."

"What were you going to do with the Bishop, Dycke?"

"I don't remember."

"You're full of shit."

"If you can't remember something, why can't I?"

"You have instant recall."

"As I get older, I'm getting senile."

"Dad, bishops do take confession."

"I'll gladly go for this one."

*******************

"You did 'what'?' Are you out of your fucking mind? What would that have proven? She would have won. I would never have gotten you back. Don't you see how stupid that was?"

"It seemed like the right thing to do at the time."

"When I get finished with you, my paddle will have turned into sawdust."

"As long as we are together, I don't care, because you are wrong as usual. It worked to our benefit, and it helped my mom. I think my mom is on the phone with your mom, apologizing, and trying to arrange a wedding. I wanted to get married today, but my dad said no. As long as he was the one that said no, I can live with it."

"If I was eighteen, I could fly there, and we could get married tomorrow."

"That's what I get for robbing the cradle."

"Do you know that Jemma, Anna, my mother, and Delicious are all pregnant?"

"No I didn't. How did your mother take it?"

"She was angry as hell, until my dad told her he is taking her with us. Richard and Holden are going to stay with the Laver's."

"Rosalyn must be thrilled. How does Rod feel about all of this?"

"I have replaced my father as the person Rod hates the most."

"You must have been a very bad boy to have him change that lineup."

"I made Roz a very rich person, and he can't touch that money. You know how much Rod worships money, and when it's so close to him, and he can't have it without Rosalyn's permission, it will drive him wild."

"You are an evil boy Gordon. I may just have to spank you to get you back in line."

"I'll take you to the sporting goods store, where you can pick out your own paddle."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



"Oh no you don't, you would probably pick one out that won't hurt you. I'll have my father take me; he will get a sturdy one."

"Remember you are only a tiny girl, and girls cannot pick up a heavy paddle. You may want to start out with a Ping-Pong Paddle, and work your way up."

"Gordon Luck, you are in so much trouble you may never be able to dig yourself out of it."

"I won't have to use my hands dear, just my tongue."

"You're in Texas, and your tongue is not that long."

"I'll see if I can remedy that in short order. I'll talk to you later love. I want to be much closer to you than I am now."

"All you want to do was get laid."

"If you don't, I'll stay here."

"Well, since you put it that way, get here in a hurry, I'll change the sheets on my bed."

"Don't change them until we make them messy. I'm going to talk to my dad, and see what arrangements can be made. Your mother is very fragile right now. I don't want to do anything that will make her fall back to the way she was."

"She's in dad's office talking with Doctor Russell. She's been in there a very long time. I hope he can help her."

"You can help her too."

"How?"

"Did she give you all those pretty things she bought for you in Paris?"

"No she didn't, I don't know where she put them."

"You could tell her you have to buy a suitcase for your trip. It has to be a big one, because you have to pack for winter and summer. Then you could ask her about the items she bought in Paris, and see how she takes it. If she does well, see if she wants to go shopping with you for the rest of the things you need. If not, after were married, you can go shopping with my mother, and my sister in Dallas to pick up everything you need."

"I like the way you think Gordon. You're getting as sneaky as your father."

"I've had over fourteen years sitting at his knee learning how to deal with people. He is the sneakiest person I have ever known. By the time contractors leave his office, they believe it was their idea to do something he wanted done.

"Your dad is something else Gordon."

"So is yours baby. He was willing to give up his life to save yours. I think he loves you."

"I think so too."

"Have you told him you love him lately?"

"Not in so many words."

"I think now would be a very good time to start, don't you?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Don't think, do it now. I am going to talk to my dad. You go to your dad, put your arms around him, and tell him how much you love him. Do it now and do it often. Good bye baby, I will talk to you later."

"Good bye Gordon, I love you."

"I love you too shorty."

"You are dead lover boy."

"I was just testing to make sure your temper was still intact."

"You will find out personally when you are close enough to feel it."

"Temper, temper little one, no hitting, and I still have my paddle."

"Gordon, you are impossible."

"That is why you love me. Goodbye. I love you more every second we are apart." 

"Me too."

**************

Zoey went to find her dad, and found him looking at the spot on the railing where she made her jump.

"Are you thinking of moving to the first floor dad."

"No, I was thinking about how brave you were to make this jump. I could never do it. Fear would have overtaken my body, and I would have stepped back from the brink."

Zoey walked over to him, put her arms around her father, and told him how much she loved him. 

"Dad, I know I don't say this often enough, and over the last three months, I haven't had the chance to say it at all. I love you so much you make my heart sing. All the years I was a bitch, you loved me, and never gave up on me. I wanted to tell you I loved you, but I couldn't because of the way I acted. I wish I could take it all back, but I can't. I love you dad, with all my heart. No one else would have risked their life to try to save me, except you. I can never repay you for that act of self-sacrifice. If you were an inch shorter, we both would have gone down."

"I knew there was going to be a dig about my height in there somewhere."

"Mister Short is the only person shorter than you are on your staff. All the women are taller than you are."

"They all wear high heels to make it seem that way."

"Mom is taller than you are."

"By half an inch, and she never lets me live it down."

"Are you going to forgive her for what she's done to you, and to us?"

"I already have. The broken paddle was a message to her, and she read more into it then was there. She thought I was leaving her, and I would never do that. People at work saw how difficult it was for me to work when I couldn't be with your mother. I was close to a nervous breakdown, because I couldn't be with her. You know how hard it was for you to be without Gordon. It's just as hard for me to be away from your mother. My life is so intertwined with hers, it's hard to tell where I begin, and she ends. We are one person, one team. One cannot work without the other. She cracked, and so did I."

Doctor Russell emerged from Dycke's office, and came over to talk to him.

"Mister Schneider, your wife is in a very fragile state of mind. It's a tossup if I should hospitalize her, or give her a chance to heal at home. Here are three prescriptions that need to be filled now, if you want her to stay here. If you would prefer to have me hospitalize her, I would suggest the University of South Carolina. I do not want to put her in the mental ward. That would be too radical. I would rather put her in an observation room, where she could be watched twenty-four hours a day. The decision is yours. You could have private duty nurses here at home to keep an eye on her while you are at work. I would suggest she never be alone.

I want to see her three times a week. I like these buildings, and the area. I will pick one and proceed to move in shortly. As far as my business office is concerned, I think I will have it more towards the downtown area."

"Where are you staying now Doctor?"

"I'm staying at the Marriott."

Dycke took out his cell phone and called the Marriott's manager.

"Hello Steven, Dycke Schneider, Doctor William Russell is staying at your hotel. Move all his items to our suite and charge all his expenses to our account."

"Yes Steven everything. Limousine service, the works."

"That was unnecessary Mister Schneider."

"We have a permanent suite of rooms at the Marriott, just in case we have an important guest stop by unannounced. You are an important guest, and that room is empty. Why should we pay double, and we can pay for one?"

"You are sounding much better, since our last talk."

"I can't tell you how much our last talk helped me. Everyone at work noticed it immediately. I would like to continue seeing you at least once a week so I can get my mind back in order."

"Very good Mister Schneider, I'm glad you feel that way. I don't want you sliding back to where you were. It happens very easily to type 'A' personalities."

"I don't want it to happen to me. I have a lot on my plate right now, and it's very important that I stay focused. I want Payne to stay at home. I will have nurses here twenty-four hours a day. If there's anything else you think will be helpful, let me know and I will have it done."

"Well, since Miss Schneider decided to take a little dive this morning, which helped break her mother's shell, I would suggest having some of your guards patrol the balcony, especially by Mrs. Schneider's bedroom.

I can't believe you made that jump. You and I are going to talk about that once things settle down here."

"Dad, I'm going to see a shrink?"

"You're going to see a shrink, or fuck your English Literature teacher so you can pass the course."

"I'll see the shrink. You haven't met my English Lit teacher."

"I take it there is a story behind passing an English literature class."

"Yes Doctor there is. I'll tell you all about it during one of our sessions."

"Mister Schneider, I think your family is going to take up one of my days."

"If we do Doctor Russell, I'll raise your retainer."

"I don't think that will be necessary, $6 million a year is more than enough."

"I'm leaving in twenty-six days dad, so it will only be you and mom."

"Where are you going Miss Schneider?"

"I'm going with my husband to the stars."

"I remember now. You are able to marry Doctor Luck's son Gordon. Congratulations, I wish you all the best."

"Thank you Doctor Russell. Gordon, and I were meant for each other. You can ask my father why."

"Mister Schneider would you care to answer your daughters question."

"Many years ago, when I first saw Payne I said to her 'My God, are you beautiful.' When we went to visit Doctor Luck and his family, Gordon opened the door, and looked at Zoey and said those exact words. Payne and I looked at each other, and I asked her 'How much trouble do you think we are in?' She told me not let go of Zoey's hand or we were in big trouble."

Somehow, during all the greetings, I lost track of both of them. They weren't in his bedroom or any other room upstairs. We checked the basement, and there was no sign of them. We asked the guards outside if they left the house, and they said no.

Payne said, "Thank God she's on those birth control pills, because she won't be a virgin when we find her."

Doctor Luck asked me if I was talking from personal experience. I told him I wasn't. It took me six weeks to get into Payne's pants.

I was hit from behind. "It was seven weeks asshole, and the only reason it happened was because you were going away, and I was going into the hospital to have my face operated on. Otherwise you would've never gotten lucky."

Dycke knowing the fragile nature of his wife took her into his arms and agreed with her.

"You know you could always out debate me, so I will not argue with you over this point. However, every time I took you out for pizza and egg creams, I got closer to your thighs."

"It's only because my thighs kept getting larger because of the calories you were putting into me."

Doctor Russell said, "Payne you must start taking your medicine as prescribed. If you don't, I'm going to put you into the hospital. Your husband wants you at home, and to be honest with you, I'm not thrilled with that decision. Take your medicines, and I will see you the day after tomorrow at 10 AM."

"I will take my meds Doctor. I have to prepare for a wedding for my daughter. I will be there to see her get married. I realize I did a lot of things wrong, but now, with the help of a lot of friends, I'm going to make that right."

"I don't want you to overstress yourself. It's the worst thing you can do in your condition."

"I will have a lot of help Doctor. I'm sure my daughter will help me with it here at home, and a lot of friends will help me in Temple."

"You bet your ass I will."

"Zoey watch your mouth."

"I was just checking mom."

"How did I do?"

"You passed with flying colors."

"Here is a list of agencies that supply registered nurses Mister Schneider. I would have each nurse checked out by your security people, before you hire them. Registered nurses have been known to kill people who are just hanging on to life. You should have a minimum of seven, the younger the better. They haven't been tortured by the system yet, and they are not jaded by the signs of illness."

"Thank you Doctor Russell, we will get on this instantly. Zoey do you want to go to pharmacy?"

"Who me?"

Payne put her arms around Zoey and said, "Yes baby, you. Would you like to go to the pharmacy for me?"

"Let me get my purse, and I'm on my way. No jokes about my driving."

"The pharmacy is half a block away, I thought you would walk."

"I'm taking my car to the pharmacy. Do I hear any objections?"

There wasn't a sound made in the room.

"Hearing no objections, I'm taking my car to the pharmacy."

Zoey grabbed her purse, kissed her parents, and said goodbye. She walked out the front door, got into the elevator and proceeded down to the first floor.

Doctor Russell gave his final instructions and was leaving when Dycke said, "Watch out for Zoey, she will be coming back, and she will be angry."

"Why is that Mister Schneider?"

Dycke reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out the three prescriptions. "She forgot to take these with her."

"Would you like me to call them into the pharmacy?"

"No, she wanted to drive to the pharmacy, now she can drive back to get the prescriptions, and do it all over again."

Doctor Russell left, and a few moments later his cell phone rang.

"Do you have the prescriptions dad?"

"They are on the dining room table; you forgot to take them."

"Would you ask Doctor Russell to talk to the pharmacist and give him the prescriptions?"

"Doctor Russell left five minutes ago. I guess you are going to have to come back and get the prescriptions."

Zoey screamed, and hung up the phone.

Steve asked her what was wrong.

"I left the dam prescriptions on the dining room table. I was in such a rush to get out of the house I forgot to take them. My dad is going to gloat over this for a very long time."

"No he's not Zoey. He loves you too much to do that to you. You're only going to be here for twenty-six more days, and he is going to love you every moment you are here."

Zoey stopped the car and looked at Steve. "When did you get so smart? That's exactly what Gordon told me to do with my parents. I have been squandering all this time complaining about them, when I should have been telling them I love them instead. Thank you for reminding me about what I should have been doing and haven't."

She parked in front of the building, went upstairs, and awaited her fate. The agent opened the door for her. She yelled, "Your daughter is back to pick up the prescription."

Payne and Dycke walked out of the bedroom and smiled at her.

"I guess it was a good idea that you took the car."

Zoey walked over to her mother, and hugged her.

"Do you remember the things I said to you this morning? Please forget them. I don't know what I would do without you. I love you mom, I'm a pain in the ass, but I really love you."

Payne did not know what to do or say. She thought she had lost her daughter forever, and here Zoey was professing her love for her. She began to cry.

Dycke waited for Payne to move her hands to hold her daughter but she stood there like a statue as Zoey hugged her. He took Payne's hands, and moved them behind her daughter's back and left up to her to do the rest. It took her time but she did, and when she did, she began talking to her.

"I feel like the worst mother in the world Zoey. I kept you from the one you loved because I didn't want to be alone. Everything I did was for me, not for you. I didn't care about your feelings, I didn't care about your future, and I didn't care about you. All I cared about was a forty-four-year-old woman, who is going to be alone for the rest of her life. I should've been the one up on the railing today. I should've jumped. I don't think your father would have jumped after me. I just felt sorry for myself, instead of being happy for you."

"You're wrong mom. Daddy would have jumped after you just as he did me. He told me how he feels about you. I don't know if he wants me to tell you or not but I'm going to anyway. He said you and he are one person. One without the other is nothing. When you broke off relations with him, he nearly had a nervous breakdown. His work suffered, and the people all around him new something was terribly wrong. Many of his top ranking people threatened to quit unless he got help. He loves you mom, he loves you more than his own life."

"Why did you have to become so smart and perceptive just before you're ready to leave?"

"Remember mom, if it wasn't for Doctor Luck, I would still be running around, driving everyone crazy, with my attitude problem."

"You're right baby, I wish you weren't but you are right. Doctor Luck did change your life, and so did Gordon. Now go get my medicines and hurry home."

"I will mom; I'll be back as soon as they are ready."

************

 "Did you have a nice talk with your mom?"

"How did you know I was talking with my mom Steve?"

"If you were talking with your father, he would have been pulling your chain about not taking the prescriptions with you, and then you would have run out of the house quickly."

"Yes Steve, I've remembered the prescriptions this time. You did put it very nicely however, and I do appreciate it."

"What are friends for if not to drop hints diplomatically?"

She put the car in gear and headed for the pharmacy. It took less than a minute to get there, and when she handed the prescriptions to the pharmacy technician, she was told it would be ninety minutes before they were ready.

"Where would you like to go Steve? We have an hour and a half before the prescriptions are ready."

"Do you mean I have a choice of telling you to go home or allowing you to drive me around and take my life in my hands again?"

"That settles it, we're going for a ride."

"I knew you would say that. I'll check in with security and tell them what's going on."

Steve was very pleased when she went southeast on Highway 171 towards Foley Beach. It was a very lightly traveled road especially at this time day. Much to his amazement, she was driving on her side of the yellow line, and just slightly above the speed limit.

He was relaxing keeping track of the time when Zoey punched the accelerator to the floor. He noticed oncoming cars veering off the highway, panic stopping.

"Zoey, what the fuck are you doing?"

"Take a look behind us."

Steve looked over his left shoulder. "Push it Zoey, push it hard. Stay with the road, don't try to turn off or we are dead."

"Why do they bother putting 160 mph on the speedometer, when this thing will only do 130?"

"Shut up and drive, that jet is still eating us up."

Behind them was a small twin-engine jet, with one engine smoking badly, and his nose gear badly damaged. It was trying to make an emergency landing on the roadway, and it was over taking them very quickly.

Steve couldn't look any more. He turned forward and tightened his seatbelt, he told Zoey to do the same thing.

"There's nothing you can do Zoey just keep going straight and hope for the best. We have twenty seconds at the most. It's been my pleasure to know you."

"It ain't over until the fat lady sings Steve. I don't hear any singing."

No sooner had she said it, then the SUVs roof began to crumble. Zoey took her foot off the accelerator, and let the jets forward momentum push them along the highway. She did not dare touch the brake pedal for fear the Jets nose would slide forward and crush them to death. They heard the jets engine go into reverse, and after a treacherous half mile, the car and the jet came to a stop.[1]

Zoey turned the ignition off, removed her seatbelt, and took a deep breath. Steve removed his seatbelt, and looked at her.

"Miss Schneider, please don't take this personally, but I never want to drive with you again. I don't know what it is about you, however things happen when you are driving I've never seen happen to anyone, anywhere, ever."

"Steve, unless it's a life or death situation, I'm not getting behind the wheel of the car again. I think someone's trying to send me a message,"

The pilot of the aircraft started banging on Zoey's window.

Zoey opened the door, got out and stood up.

"Are you guys okay; was there anybody in the rear of the car?"

"Are you fucking out of your mind, you scared us to death?"

"I really am sorry, but you just saved seven people's lives. There was no way I could have made a safe landing without using your truck to keep the nose of my aircraft up. I have too much fuel on board, and one spark from my starboard engine would have made us into a fireball. Our company will be more than generous to you; I can guarantee it."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



"What company do you work for?"

"Valentino International."

"Please don't tell me Robert is on board."

 

"Yes Miss, Mister Valentino is on board

"Is he all right?"

"He's a little shaken, but he'll be fine."

"Let me make a phone call."

*****************

"Hello dad I've had a little problem with an airplane."

"You went to the pharmacy to get medicine for your mother. How could you possibly have gotten into a problem with an airplane?"

"The prescriptions weren't going to be ready for an hour and a half. I took a ride down Route 171, and an airplane landed on the roof of our SUV. It wasn't my fault dad, honest.

"I can see how that would not be your fault Zoey. Is everyone alright?"

"Yes, and that presents the problem."

"How does everyone being alright present a problem?"

"The airplane belongs to Valentino International, and one of the passengers is Robert Valentino

 "Is the Governor with him?"

"I'll ask dad."

"Is the governor with him?"

"Yes and her sisters."

"The governor and her sisters are on board with Robert." 

"Get the women out of the aircraft and into the SUV if you can. Disguise Robert as one of the pilots. A helicopter will be on its way to get you shortly. Follow the instructions given by the leader of the Army group."

"Okay dad, I will take care of it now."

"Good girl, you did great work Zoey, I'm proud of you."

"It's been a very exciting day dad. I'm glad I'm still here to enjoy it."

"So are your mother and me."

"I can hear police sirens coming. I want to make the transfer now. Goodbye dad."

Zoey ran into the aircraft, and introduced herself. "Hello Robert, I am Zoey Schneider. I just got off the phone with my dad, and this is what he wants to do. He would like the Governor and her sisters to get into the SUV. He will be sending a helicopter to pick you up and get you out of here before the press arrives. This roadway is far off the beaten path, so we may have as much as half an hour before that happens. Hopefully, you'll be out of here before then. Governor, ladies, if you follow me. Robert, lose the jacket, put on the pilots tie, aviator glasses, and hat. You have now been promoted to second officer. You sir have been a guest on the aircraft. Where were you going?"

"Baltimore-Washington International Airport."

"Tell Robert everything he needs to know about approaches and runways to that airport just in case the police get curious."

Governor Hastings and her three sisters followed Zoey out of the aircraft, and hurriedly to the beat up SUV.

Steve was able to inch the car forward nearly a foot without jeopardizing the aircraft's position, and repositioned the seats for their comfort.

Sandy asked, "How much do you know about us Zoey?"

"Sexually, everything, but you don't have to worry, because were all family. Anything that happens inside the family stays in the family. I take it you know all about me."

"There's been a news blackout on you for about the last four months. What's been going on?"

"When my mother and I came back from Paris she decided unilaterally that I was not going to marry Gordon, and that I was not going into space with Doctor Luck. I thought my mom and dad would work it out, but as time got closer, they both nearly had nervous breakdowns. Believe it or not, it all ended this morning, quite melodramatically... and then this afternoon we were out for a peaceful ride, and an airplane landed on my car. It's been an exciting day."

"You actually jumped?"

"Yes I did. I didn't want any more of the arguing, and the fighting that was going on. I missed Gordon, and I knew if my mother had her way I was never going to be with him. My life was not going to be worth anything without him, so I jumped.

"You were out of your mind Zoey, do you realize that?"

"Yes, and I'll be seeing Doctor Russell until I leave because of it."

"What kind of Doctor is he?"

"He's a Proctologist. He's going to see if he can pull my head out of my ass."

"The police are here. If Steve can't hold them off, I will get out of the car, and help him. When the helicopter gets here, don't run walk naturally towards it, and get in. Don't turn around even if the police yell stop. If I don't get on it's fine. My dad will take care of me, Robert and Steve. More than likely, they won't even recognize Robert's last name. Dad will take care of everything that needs to be done." 

Sandi said, "I don't need a scandal before take office."

"How can you possibly be involved in a scandal? You were out for a family vacation in Robert's hometown of Glen Falls New York, where you visited with some of his family friends. 

Then you were flying to Charleston to visit us, and you were you were nearly killed in an aircraft accident. What is so scandalous about that?"

"You know what we are doing with Robert."

"The same thing I wanted to be doing with Gordon. I'm very happy for you all. Personally, I like Doctor Luck's idea best. I call him dad when I'm in Texas. He's like a second father to me."

"I'm almost afraid to ask what his idea is. Most of them are so crazy they defy logic. However, they wind up making him millions of dollars a year because they work."

"Dad thinks you should get pregnant by telling everyone you're going to use in vitro fertilization. However, you're going to use a close personal friend, who may or may not be standing by the aircraft. You should tell everyone you are too afraid to get married, because of what happened to your mother early in her life. The images of her being ravaged by your father still haunt you, night and day. It doesn't matter to you if the baby is black, white, or Asian, but you want a child of your own, before you are too old to carry a one. 

There is one more thing the good Doctor said. While you are trying to become pregnant, your sisters could announce that they are going to undergo the same procedure. They don't want an only child running around the governor's mansion. It would be totally unfair to the child to live in such a big house alone.

If you want, you can say this trip to upstate New York was for the initial tests to have these procedures performed at a private clinic. They can search and search all they want, and they will never find the place that it was performed."

Sandi said, "You don't know how long I have wanted to have a baby. I just couldn't find a way to have one with the man I love the most. You've just given it to me. I believe you've just given it to all of us. What do you think Danni?"

"Come to our offices when your periods are due, and I'll start doing blood tests. You can make the announcement this month, and we will announce it before your inauguration. It should cause quite a stir."

"Military helicopter approaching at 9 o'clock. Wait for my signal, and then do as I told you to do."

****************

As the Blackhawk helicopter was approaching from the northeast; the television trucks were speeding to the site from the northwest.

Zoey waved her arms to the helicopter indicating where she wanted it to touch down. Once she got a thumbs-up from the flight deck of the helicopter, she ran out of the way, and signaled the women in the car to start moving towards her. 

The helicopter touched down about thirty yards from the SUV, and the police moved to intercept them. Armed military personnel hurried to put a barrier between the women and the police.

A police Sergeant asked the Lieutenant, "What the hell's going on here?"

"I'm sorry Sergeant, but this is a very tricky diplomatic matter. These are Saudi women. They were out for a good time, without their high-ranking husband's knowledge or approval. If their husbands saw the way they were dressed, and their faces were made up, these women would have had their heads cut off. We would have been blamed for the insult to their religion. 

Back here, there would've been a row of testicles lining General Moore's desk, starting with mine and ending with Colonel Bradman's. I like my balls exactly where they are, if you know what I mean."

"I know exactly what you mean Lieutenant. Thank goodness you got them out of here before those newshounds arrived. There would be nothing I could do to erase those tapes. How did this aircraft wind up hitting Miss Schneider's SUV?"

"Hold on one second Sergeant."

The Lieutenant listened in his earpiece, and said 'Yes Sir' repeatedly. When he finished speaking he pulled his headset off. 

"Goddamn spooks. Is one of those pilots named Robert?"

"Yes, Robert Valentino."

"The emir's sons' concubine would like him to join her in the helicopter. Isn't that nice, they bring their concubines with them."

"What the hell else are they going to do with their money?"

"How about paying us back for protecting their asses?"

"There is a novel idea, if I ever heard one. I'll go get him for you."

"Would you bring Miss Schneider with you, also? I might as well get her out of this zoo."

**********************

The helicopter landed on the military side of the Charleston Airport, and three long black limousines awaited for its blades to stop. The side door popped open, and an agent went inside. He handed each of them a black headscarf, and a long gown, which would conceal their identities. One at a time, with Zoey and Robert mixed in, the six of them entered the center limousine. 

Zoey was amazed to see her mother and her father sitting together in the rear seat. It was the first time she seemed confident, and relaxed, while sitting next to her father. This more than anything else made her very happy.

She kissed her parents, and asked, "May I be allowed to make the introductions?"

"Go ahead Zoey."

"Will everyone please remove your head coverings please."

"As you know the first one is the hardest dad, but I'm going to take a guess. I believe he is Robert Valentino."

Zoey cringed, because she knew her mother was going to hit her.

Payne did not disappoint her daughter. She smacked her on her arm and left a good size red mark to remind her not to do it again.

"Okay, I have been chastised. Mom, dad, the new governor of the State of Maryland, Sandi Hastings."

Payne and Dycke extended their hands and congratulated Sandi on her win.

"I have been a fan of your great uncle and your father for a very long time. I almost wished that your great uncle had not appointed your dad to the Supreme Court. I believed he would have made an excellent president. I will be watching you very closely, and several of my friends will be doing the same. You have the right pedigree, and perfect timing. In six or ten years, one of our friends will knock at your door, if you don't disappoint us. This person will ask you an important question. If you answer correctly, doors will start to open for you, and you will start to meet the right people. No one will tell you what to do; they will suggest what you should do. As your father used to do with President Atwater, when you say you want something done and you know it will never be done, always have the name of the fall guy at your fingertips. If you want gun-control legislation pushed through the Congress that will take every assault weapon off the street will it pass governor?"

"No, it'll never make it through the Congress. The National Rifle Association, the gun manufacturers, and every other special interest group will fight it tooth-and-nail."

"So who is your fall guy governor? Why, as President of these United States, can't you get these horrible assault weapons off the streets of our cities?"

"The bill will never get past the Congress."

"That is exactly what your father told President Atwater to say, and he was correct. Do you remember going on the campaign trail with your dad?"

"Yes, I was a junior in college."

"How many times did you hear the future president say "I'm not going to promise you anything, because the Congress is not going to allow me to give it to you? Unless you give me a bulletproof Congress, I'm not going to be able to move this country forward."

"Mister Schneider, we heard it at home, before it came out of Uncle Clark's mouth. We were forced to sit on the couch in the living room, and listen to my father deliver the speech over and over again until it was perfect. When it was perfect, he started to tinker with it to make it even better. He drove us crazy with it, but when he was finished, and Uncle Clark delivered that speech to an audience, it was absolutely perfect. The talking heads at the new stations couldn't pick any of his speeches apart, because they were all impeccable. He would never take credit for them. He would always give the credit to the speech writing team. Uncle Clark used to ask him, "When am I going to meet my speech writing team?"

Dad used to say, "You're married to her. Miss Julia is your brains. Miss Julia is your strength. Don't fuck up, or she'll kill you. I think that's the only time my dad ever cursed."

As they approached his building he said, "Your apartment is one floor below mine. We will show it to you on the way up and give you your key cards, and elevator codes. You can decide how long you wish to stay, or how soon you want to leave. I don't know what they're going to do with your aircraft, but I have plenty of them on the flight line, and they can take you home anytime you wish. There is a pink aircraft there that belongs to Payne. She can fly you home as soon as you're ready. Your bags will be here within the next two hours, or as soon as Steve can get them away from the aircraft. We are attempting to change the flight plan, and the names of the people that were on board the aircraft, just in case the NTSB gets too nosy. If they do, I have friends that can come down very hard on them. If it's alright with you, instead of being so formal, we could go on a first name basis."

"Thank you Dycke, I think that would make all of us much more comfortable."

"This apartment belongs to Christian Chase, a very good friend of ours. He lives in New Mexico, and I can't convince him to move east, where we could use his computer talents more effectively.

Your refrigerator is freshly stocked, and there is a very nice assortment of wines at your disposal. Agents will guard each of you every day, individually, and together. Don't worry about restocking the refrigerator, or cleaning the apartment. Maid service will be available every afternoon after 2 PM. Will that be acceptable to all of you?"

"You did all this since Zoey called you Dycke?"

"There were two of us. We made a list of what needed to be done, and split it in half. Payne did her part, and I did mine. I don't think it took us ten minutes, did it dear?"

"No it didn't. I wish it had taken longer, because waiting for things to happen at the accident site was nerve-racking."

"It was tough for us to convince the local Army people to get the helicopter to the accident site quickly. I had to get the Army Chief of Staff on the phone, and have him explain the facts of life to the base commander."

Robert said, "It sounds like something my mother would have done."

"Well at least my daughter and five of her little friends didn't try to start a nuclear war."

Robert shook his head. "I swear my mother has not learned how to keep her mouth shut. I'm amazed that the Russians don't have our pictures, names, addresses, and cell phone numbers."

Cindy's mouth was so wide open. Robert used his finger to close it. It was a mistake, because once it was closed, it started working again.

"What did you do, and when did you do it. I don't want to hear any bullshit out of you Valentino. I swear I'll neuter you if you try."

"Do you see what you started now Dycke?"

"You're among family Robert. What is said among family, stays within the family."

Sandi said, ""I've swear I heard that quotation earlier today."

"I can't imagine from who."

Payne said, "Miss Schneider, I think you and I are going to talk later on today."

"Yes mother."

"What did you do Robert?"

"We were playing a computer game on a laptop, but it was really slow. We decided to use my mother's Cray 4 instead. She didn't know I was able to bypass all of the security devices, including her 'Retina Scan' to get into the Cray's crypt. I had been doing it for so long, and I never got caught, so it was easy. We inserted the games computer disc into the Cray computer, made a few changes and adjustments to the program to make it harder, and run faster. Then we hit play. What we didn't realize was we took down the entire Russian defense signals network when we did it. They could not send or receive messages on their digital telephones, broadband, Wi-Fi, or telemetry systems. The Russian military was in the dark, and they did not know what happened, or why. 

Our parents were upstairs by the pool having a cookout, when the feds raided the place using helicopters, and police cars. We didn't know anything was going on, because we couldn't hear what was going on. The lead agent went over to my mother and told her she was under arrest. She asked him why. He said to her, 'I cannot tell you, it's a matter of national security.' She took out her cell phone, called the director of the FBI, 'Michael Free', and asked him what she did wrong now. She's having a cookout with her father and six friends, poolside.

The director told her what was happening and thought she was the cause. My mother looked around the area and yelled, "Oh no, the kids." 

She dropped her phone, and started running towards the house, with my father, Mister Chase, and the FBI man chasing her. She got down to the basement and saw that the door accessing the Cray was open. She walked into the room, and yelled, "Don't anyone move."

When Michael Free told the President who did it, and how it was done, he had a problem. Where do you put six 9 year-old children in prison, for spying on an enemy government, while using a toy program? His prosecutor would be laughed out of court, during opening statements. The jury, while looking at these six clean-cut prepubescent children, and listening to them testifying, in perfect, clear English, would send any prosecutor home with a migraine. They had to arrange a plea bargain, and the prosecution had no cards to play.

The children, their parents, attorneys, and the Attorney General were asked to attend a meeting in the Oval Office to work on a deal."

As the President took his seat, and looked at the defendants, he felt like an idiot. As a former prosecutor, he knew a losing case when he saw one.

"Good evening children, parents, counsel, I would like to make this as quick and painless as possible. There will be no record of this event, no probation, no anything against any of these children, or their parents. I need one thing in return. I need all copies of this program destroyed. If this is agreeable this meeting is over."

My father stood up, thanked the President for his offer, and advised him that the programs had already been destroyed, in front of an FBI agent.

The President smiled. "This meeting is adjourned. It was great doing business with you."

"Mr. President, you still have two problems."

"What are they Mr. Valentino?"

"My daughters, Laura, and Anna have photographic memories. If they see it, hear it, or read it, they do not forget it, ever. They will try to forget this program, but it will always pop-up in the back of their minds one day or another. My dad did not know that I was photographic at the time. It got me out of a lot of work.

"Laura Valentino, do you have instant recall?"

"Yes sir."

"What is on my desk, starting on the top right side?"

Laura closed her eyes and rattled off everything that was on his desk, including the piece of paper the sleeve of his jacket was now covering.

"Anna Valentino, do you have instant recall."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



"No sir. However, if I concentrate on a particular item, like the crack in the frame of Thomas Jefferson's picture, I will remember it."

"There is no crack in that frame. I look at that picture every day, while I am thinking."

"Mr. President, you are looking at the picture not the frame. The crack is on the left side, 6 inches from the bottom, moving from back to front. If it is not repaired within the next 18 months the picture will become irreparable."

The President hit a button on his desk and said, "Bring me a magnifying glass."

In less than one minute, a young man stepped into the room, handed the President a magnifying glass, and left the room, without saying a word.

"Show me the crack please, Anna."

Anna walked to the picture of Jefferson and pointed.

"Are you talking about that tiny thing? It will never destroy this painting."

"May I borrow your pen sir?"

The President handed her a ballpoint pen.

Anna drew a tiny line ¾ of an inch above the crack, and handed the pen to the President.

"I do not want you to think I am pressing too hard, or intentional trying to hurt the frame. If you would place the tip of the pen where I drew the line and begin to write your name lightly, you will see what I mean."

The President took the challenge, and began writing his name in script. He finished the first letter, when one inch of the side of the frame flaked off. He stood there amazed.

"How did you know?"

"There was wood dust on your immaculate blue carpet. Something is in there eating away at the frame. The picture will be next. I love T.J. As far as I am concerned, he was the best president we have ever had, for his time, in this country's history. FDR was very good. LBJ was adequate. Eisenhower warned us of our impending love of the Military/Industrial Complex. I wish he had lived longer to keep ringing the warning bell. 

Nixon, Ford, and Carter were busts. 

David Steadman said of his boss, 'Reagan nearly bankrupted us, but he did bankrupt the Soviet Union.' 

Kennedy didn't have enough time. Then we had the warmonger, George H. W. Bush, who went after the wrong country, and his intelligence people told him so. He didn't want to hear it."

William Jefferson Clinton stopped that nonsense and left us with a blowjob, and surplus in our budget.

 Enter 'W' BUSH, and instead of going after Pakistan, who he was told was the real culprit, and the real home of al Qaida, he got us mired down in Iraq, to finish 'Daddy's' war, by going after Saddam Hussein. Then he attacked Afghanistan, which no one has ever conquered, not even Alexander the Great. The Russians tried and they failed. No one can beat a country that doesn't have an organized army. They fight like the Vietcong did, and we lost there too. 

 "Is that the truth Michael?"

"It is the truth. However, I thought they were eight years old at the time. Now that you've heard his story. You must forget it, and never repeat it, not even to a White House Chief of Staff. Information like that has been known to leak, and it could be very damaging to your parents, and to this nation. You wouldn't want your father to be thrown off the bench because of a scandal like that would you?"

The four young women said no instantly. With that in mind, their lips were sealed permanently.

Robert smiled at Michael's play of the Ace of Trump. He knew this information could not tarnish Justice Hastings. It could tarnish his parents, his grandparents, Harold Chase and his family, and onward down the line. Michael was no one's fool, and he was a skillful adversary. He, also, did not have the Ace of Trump in his hand."

**********************

Zoey asked, "Robert have you spoken with anyone in your family since last Saturday?"

"I haven't, but I have a feeling I should have. What is happening in my inner circle?"

"Several women have become pregnant."

"I know it is not my mother. Who is going to pop first?

"You don't want to guess? You are willing to lose $5000.00, without trying?"

"Five Grand, this must be a very interesting guess." He went through every member of his family, and remembered that his and the Luck's were joined as families. Zoey was going to marry Gordon Luck soon, and that made her eligible. He looked at Zoey, and she blushed under his scrutiny. He turned away from her, and turned quickly back. 

"It's you Zoey, you are pregnant, aren't you. You tried to sneak this one by me."

Payne said, "She is not, are you?"

"You are correct mother; I am definitely not pregnant. I am taking those little pills every morning to remain human, remember."

"Oh yes, I remember."

"Robert, Jemma is expecting her third child, in late June or early July. 

"Please tell me you're kidding me. My grandfather's eighty-nine years old. That makes Jemma sixty-four. I didn't know women could get pregnant at that age."

"Apparently, neither did your grandparents. However Jemma is pregnant. I found out from Gordon this morning. This has been a very interesting day dad. A lot has happened since this morning."

"Yes Zoey, a lot has happened today, and I for one am very happy about it, aren't you darling?"

"Yes I am Dycke. I am feeling much better now than I was this morning."

"Very good, can I get you anything?"

"No I am Fine."

There was a knock at the front door.

Dycke called security to see who they let by.

"Steve is here with your luggage."

Zoey opened the door and let him in. He was using a luggage cart, and it was packed to the gills.

Zoey looked at Cindi and shrugged her shoulders.

Cindi said, "They are for appearances sake."

"I understand."

Dycke stood up. "We have had a long and interesting day; so have you. I am going to take my wife upstairs, and see that she gets some rest. I have business matters to attend to, and a young man in Temple Texas is expecting a phone call from his fiancée. There are cars at your disposal, just tell your security team where you want to go, get in the back, and you will get there. You will go in two vehicles. If you want to go out to dinner, our agents can tell you all the places we go to, or you can call us, and we will tell you. Enjoy your stay. One more thing; call your parents, and let them know you are alive. It's the humane thing to do." 

As they were entering their apartment, and agent called out, "Mrs. Schneider, there is a package here you have to sign for. There is also one here for Zoey to sign."

Dycke said, "Go inside dear I will sign them." 

"I'm sorry sir, Mrs. Schneider has to sign for hers, and Zoey for hers."

Payne returned to the door and signed for her package. It was very heavy. Zoey said the same thing about her package after she signed.

"They look like twins mom, why don't you open yours first?"

"Would you get me something to open this with dear?"

"Okay."

It took time to get through all the wrappings, but when she did, Payne gasped. In a beautiful leather bound book, more than 8 inches in depth, written in gold leaf it simply said, "Mother



There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



"Why do I have a feeling you're not pulling my leg?"

"I'm not pulling your leg, it's all true. I sent a military helicopter to get them out of there."

"Should I tell Stephano and Patti?"

"No, let Robert do that once I have them safely ensconced in an apartment here. I don't know what he wants to tell them or not. The governor can work out her own strategy once things calm down."

"I guess that's the reason Zoey hasn't called Gordon."

"I would think so. She has had an exciting morning. We will talk more about that later. Payne and I have reconciled. We will also talk more about that later."

"You are killing me here Dycke."

"When I am able to tell you about this morning, we will both die."

"I will wait for your phone call."

**********************

I emailed Gordon. "I spoke with Dycke. Zoey has been busy to the extreme, and will call you ASAP."

"K"

Gordon was looking at an area of the Milky Way on the border between the constellations Lyra and Cygnus, when the computer lit the screen up like a flare. As it was localizing itself on a star, Gordon yelled for me to join him.

One of the fantastic things about our Exascale computers is that they never sleep. They take information in from everywhere. They digest the materials, assemble it into the proper files, and then it gets rid of the garbage.

Today using multiple images returned from the Kepler spacecraft, launched in 2009, and whose pointing system failed in 2013, Exascale believed it had found Earth 2. It orbits a sun like star, just like ours, and its distance from the star places it squarely in the Goldilocks habitable zone. The planets radius is 1 1/2 times our Earth, rotates around its sun in 385 days, and has a mass five times greater than our Earth, and its gravity appeared to be 1.1 of Earth.

I called Joseph Oyster to my side and showed him what we had discovered.

He tapped Gordon on his shoulder, and asked him to print it out for him. After he read the parameters he got down on his knees before me, and begged. "Even, please let me call Ames with this information, and send it to them. I will kiss your bare ass every afternoon at lunch in the cafeteria if you let me do this. The guys there will envy me for the rest of their lives when they see my name attached to this."

"Joseph that's one of the differences between working here, and working in the outside world. We don't work for fame, or fortune. It comes to us naturally. That's why the outside world envies what we do. If one of our scientists comes up with a patentable product, his name comes first, and our name comes second. He gets the bulk of the income, and we get a mere thirty-five percent in return for allowing him to work here, in this collegial atmosphere."

"Even, please, just this once, I've taken so much shit through the years from the government, and those people, let me have this one moment to shine."

"What do you think Gordon?"

"No."

"I'm going to kill you unless you change your mind."

"How?"

"I have two black belts in karate."

"Let me see your card."

Oyster presented his karate award cards to Gordon, and he smiled."

"You can send the information out now under your name, provided you promised me three bouts."

"Do you have any belts to prove you're worthy of me?"

"I've been practicing."

"I can take you apart in the ring."

"Do you want the information or not?"

"Yes I want it."

"Tomorrow night, at 7 o'clock in the gymnasium, for our first bout. I won't be too hard on you."

"Why do I have the feeling I've just been taken to lunch Even?"

"He didn't lie to you. He has no official certifications. All he has been doing is practicing."

"Practicing against whom?"

"Me."

Joseph turned around and saw Liz standing there.

"If he's been training with you, I take it he's very fast?"

"Yes he is, and when you see his legs tomorrow night, you will know I am faster than he is."

"What can I do for you Liz?"

"Monty called with a message for Gordon. ' Two dozen turkey eggs were intercepted before they entered The Good Luck. I'm going to break your neck."

"Liz, would you send this reply to Monty please. ' How could you have missed the other three dozen? Gordon"

"Gordon, you don't want me to send that to her do you? She will kill you."

"No she won't, but she will beat the shit out of me tonight."

Oyster said, "You are going to spar with someone tonight, and fight me tomorrow night?"

"Of course, it makes things more interesting."

"Even, your son is out of his mind."

"Joseph, how long have you been saying that to me?"

(Astronomers at the Ames Research Center named Earth 2/ Kepler 452b/ 1400 L.Y. away from Earth. They did not mention Joseph Oyster's name in the press release, and he was pissed.)

*******************

"Liz, he's just doing that to piss me off. Every package that went into the ship was searched today. Everything that came in from a vendor was checked to make sure the seals were not broken. Trust me, no eggs got into this spacecraft."

"I know Monty, he just wanted you juiced up for tonight's practice. He's fighting Dr. Oyster tomorrow night at the gym in the main building. Oyster has two black belts, and Gordon wants to see how he does against him."

"I think I'll crush that little monster tonight, and let Oyster do it again tomorrow."

"Don't do it, I want to see how he does against the good Doctor."

"Everyone is taking my fun away."

"I didn't say you couldn't spar with him, I just said don't kill him."

"Okay, but we only have two dozen days before we leave."

"You must have eggs on your mind."

"I know that little son of a bitch is going to try something, I just don't know where or when."

"There is only one entrance to the spacecraft open. You have six men checking everything that goes into it. There are two more by the door, and agents all over the second floor watching for people trying to sneak things in. It's not going to happen. Your protocols are perfect; I've never seen anything better."

"Thanks Liz, that means a lot coming from you."

*******************

From 1 PM to 5 PM, I scheduled drills for the flight crew on the spacecraft. The first two hours was for the primary crew, and the second two hours was for their backups, just in case anything went wrong during their flight.

I program faults of every kind into the Exascale computer to keep everyone on their toes while they were at their positions. I did not want them to sit there and rest.

At 12:45 PM, we left the dining room and proceeded to the NEST. As we stood in line to be searched before boarding 'The Good Luck' everyone was being frisked thoroughly.

Monty stood by the walkway to the entrance of the spacecraft to make sure everything was done to her standards.

Gordon slipped to the right side of the line outside of her view. She was sure he was up to something and was ready to call it in, when it became his time to be searched.

When he appeared at the desk, he was completely naked. No shoes, no socks, nothing to hide anywhere. He turned his back to her bent down and spread the cheeks of his ass to give Monty a good look.

Monty said something into her radio, and the agents laughed. 

Zeke said to Gordon, "Your mistress said don't be late for practice this evening. She's going to feed you your liver."

"Tell my mistress she was late last time, and I messed up her hair, and makeup."

"You are getting a little bossy with her Gordon."

"The only reason I am is she will hit me harder. I want to know how it feels to be hit by a truck, and not a powder puff."

"In that case, you will get what you asked for Gordon."

"Thank you Zeke"

**************

Gordon gathered his clothes and began walking up the ramp. Monty stopped him before he was able to enter the spacecraft. She took each piece of clothing and inspected it for an egg. As she was finished with each piece, she dropped it on the floor in front of her. She smiled at him, stepped forward onto his clothes.

"If there is an egg in there, you now have a problem."

"I'm not the one with the problem; you have two dozen turkey eggs in this spacecraft, in a nice warm area, waiting to hatch."

"Bullshit, no eggs have gotten by my security people and you could not have gotten those eggs past them."

"Yes I know, they are very good at their jobs. However who is watching your security people? A lot of money goes a long way, when they think their jobs are nearly at an end."

"You son of the bitch, you are using my people against me."

"Did I just say that out loud? I must be getting dumber by the minute."

"You're doing this just to drive me crazy."

"Do not ever do that to me again Monty. If you leave me another opening like that, you will kill me, justifiably, for what I will say next."

"Little turd, go to work before your arms are facing the wrong way."

"My dad already told you that you can't do that to me. I am a necessary evil for this adventurer of ours. However, after I train you in celestial navigation, you can kill me anytime you want. I have chosen you as my first student."

"You can't do that to me. We will kill each other before the first week is over."

"I am a very stern taskmaster. You will learn, and you will learn quickly."

"The people on the flight deck are going to roar with laughter."

"They will not be laughing. They will be training their replacements as well."

"This is not a good idea Gordon." 

"For the first 14 years of my life you have trained and protected me Monty. Now it is my turn to train and protect you."

"You are out of your mind Gordon."

"Everyone in family believes it's hysterical. Mom believes turnabout is fair play. Delicious cannot wait to see how I interact as a teacher, with my new student."

"It's too bad she's pregnant, otherwise I kill her too."

"You're all talk and no action Monty. You don't know how to kill out of hate. I don't know what happened to you when you were very young. However, all your energies are focused on protecting those to whom you are assigned."

"That's what I get paid to do it Gordon."

"So does every other agent, but they don't take their charges under their wings, as you have done with me. They don't teach them self-defense. They don't teach them to keep talking to their kidnappers so they stay calm and look for a weakness. None of them do what you have done for me, and you know it."

"Your father pays me extra for those lessons."

"Tell me you wouldn't do it anyway, and I'll change my student."

Monty stayed quiet, because like her student, she wouldn't lie.

"Do you remember what you said to me the first day we met Monty?"

"No, but I know I'm going to regret it now."

"You said, 'If I tell you you're going to die, you're going to die. If I tell you you're going to live, you're going to live.' I was three years old when you said that to me, and I remember it like it was yesterday."

"I remember now. Your answer was 'I prefer the second one'."

"You are correct. Then you put me by a window in Grayson's apartment as bait. Your boss wanted the opposing force to see someone in the apartment, but not my sister, or Gray. They were newly married, and supposed to be screwing their brains out, as part of your trap. You left me with two men to protect me, and told me you would see me later. I asked you if that meant I was going to live, and you said absolutely. I felt much better after you said that to me, because I knew you would not lie to a three-year-old boy."

"I should have lied to you, because you've grown up to be the biggest pain in the ass I've ever had."

"I've loved every minute of it Monty and I would do it all over again."

"I would go to Switzerland and ask for asylum."

"I would find a way to get paperwork to show I was your child."

"I would kill you before I acknowledged that relationship."

"Zoey said if we were closer in age, we would be married. That is how compatible we are."

"Compatible, Zoey has to go back to school, and read up on what makes marriages work. The two of you have it. Your hearts and souls are connected. It was obvious from the first second you two saw each other."

"It was the same way for us Monty. The only difference was time, and we had more of it then Zoey and I did."

Over the loudspeaker I yelled, "If my son, has been sewn back together by the security guards at the entrance to the Good Luck, he is needed at the flight deck. We cannot start the simulation without him. Take your hand out of his ass Monty; he doesn't have any eggs in him today."

Everyone at the security entrances laughed.

Gordon asked, "Am I cleared to enter the ship Monty?"

"Tell your father after tonight, you're going to have two assholes."

"I'll be looking forward to it. I have a bout tomorrow night against Dr. Oyster. He has two black belts in karate. Since you don't want me to go higher within the system, I would like to see what I can do outside it."

"Prepare for a night of defensive moves, and only hit him when he is vulnerable. Feel him out first, before you go into the attack mode. I will show you how tonight."

"Not in slow motion, I want you at full speed otherwise it's a waste of time."

I yelled, "Is your fist stuck up his ass Monty?"

"I can't get it by his prostate Dr. Luck. This boy needs to get laid."

"That's not my problem, if you can't get by his prostate, pull it out with your hand."

"That might hurt him a little bit Dr. Luck."

"As long as it doesn't hurt me, I don't care."

"Okay, here goes."

The next thing everybody heard was Gordon screaming. Monty came back on the line, breathing hard.

"My hand is out of his rectum Dr. luck, but we have another problem."

"What is it Monty?"

"When I pulled my hand out, Gordon ejaculated all over the ship. We now have a white streak about 20 feet long, and it's dripping down. I've never seen a man so loaded with semen in my entire life. Women are taking pictures of it to show their husbands, and men are feeling depressed because of Gordon's prowess."

"Get my son up here, before we have a mass desertion of highly qualified people. I'm going to kill that boy. Him, his turkey eggs, and his need to get laid."

"You can't blame the last one on him Dr. Luck. He is his father's son. If you built him a room in the basement, or put soundproofing in his room so he wouldn't have to listen to you and Jennifer every night, he might have had a chance at a normal sex drive. When Liz and I work late, and we are sitting in the living room, we can hear you having intercourse with Jennifer. Gordon is 30 feet closer to you. I can only imagine what Richard and Holden are hearing directly across from you. Richard is now 11, and Holden is six. I would venture to say their knowledge of sex is way beyond anything anyone their ages should know."

"You should only know what they know Monty. When they found out their mother was pregnant, and they asked Gordon what their options might be, he told them. They went on to the Internet and watched a birth. They listened to the mother scream as she delivered the baby, and the father smiled as they handed the baby to him. They found that offensive until he handed the baby to the mother, and the baby began to nurse. They made a decision at that moment that Jennifer should come with me, and they would stay with Rod and Rosalynn to continue their scientific work and build the Good Luck 2."

"Your children are amazing Dr. Luck. Jennifer has done a very good job raising them."

"I couldn't have done anything without my wife's help. She has given me the freedom to continue working as I have worked all my life. She is an amazing woman. I fell in love with her the moment I looked into her black eyes and saw her pure soul. I have to go Monty, my son has finally made it to the flight deck, and we can begin our simulation."

"Congratulations Gordon, you're only 30 minutes late."

"The next time you are going to run a simulation, and you say is going to start at 1 o'clock, I'll be here at 12 PM so they can start searching me. By the time they are finished, the rest of you should be here, and whiz through without any problem."

"That's a wonderful idea Gordon, why didn't I think of that?"

"I could say I'm smarter than you, but that would start another argument, and we would start the simulation until 3 o'clock, when the second crew is supposed to be here."

"I'm amazed, 14 years with Monty, and she hasn't killed you. She must have the patience of a saint."

"I could say the same about my mother. She's been with you for 14 years, and you are still alive. She must have the patience of two Saints. The good Lord must have given her lessons in forgiveness."

"Take your position Gordon, and please put your pants on."

"Tell Monty to leave me alone the next time I try to board the ship; and I will be fully dressed when I arrive at my station."

"These new protocols are in place because of you."

"I am innocent until proven guilty."

"Prepare for launch."

"Detach all exterior connections."

 Gray said, "All lights are green."

"Are you ready for your first flight Teddy?"

"We go nowhere."

"Today we are practicing like we are going. Soon everything will be for real."

"Don't like seat."

"What is the matter with your new safety seat? We designed it from your body image."

"Body grow, seat don't."

"We will make you a bigger seat and have you test it before it is installed in the spacecraft."

"Make big seat like captain, use cushions keep me safe."

"I am not sure I like that idea. Maybe we can do it in two phases. One until you become a teenager, and then a big captain seat."

"Cheater."

"Oh is that what this is all about. You want a captain's chair. Well, you may be second in command when you get a little older, but I can send you to your room and have you stand in a corner, until you start behaving like a member of my crew." 

"Yes captain, bad Teddy."

"You are forgiven. Now shall we practice for our flight into space?"

"Rather go, but practice okay."

"I would like to go also Teddy, but what is the ship missing that leaving now would make our trip a disaster?"

Teddy thought for a second, then shouted, "Water, water not here yet."

"How much water Teddy?"

"505 thousand gallons at 64 degrees to 102 degrees." 

Delicious yelled, "104 degrees, Teddy."

"Mommy wrong."

"Listen you two, I am not going to have a fight over two degrees stop this arguing right now. Let's continue our countdown."

"Security, do your checks, and seal all exterior doors."

Grey responded, "Security verifies all passengers are strapped in, seats are in free motion, and all exterior doors are locked, sealed and green."

"Bring inside atmosphere to 85 percent, and verify there is no deviation."

Gordon replied, "Atmosphere at 85% and holding. There is no leakage."

"Nuclear engine to 3%."

"Nuclear engine at 3%.

"Standby Magnetic Engines."

"Magnetic Engines in Standby mode."

"All stations report."

"Main Engineering, Go. Celestial Navigation, Go, Inertial Navigation Go. Nuclear Power Plant, Go. Magnetic Propulsion System, Go."

"Delicious make our altitude 500 feet."

"500 feet sir."

"Liftoff 1:38 PM, climbing to altitude now 500 feet."

"Full Systems Check"

"We Are Green across the Board."

"Altitude 500 feet captain."

"Retract landing gear."

"Landing gear retracting, and we have green lights."

"Bring nuclear engine up to 50% power."

"Navigation, heading 138 degrees. Azimuth 67 degrees positive; advise when we are 500 miles from the Earth's equator, and passing through 110 miles above the earth."

"Roger captain, heading 138 degrees. Angle on the bow 67 degrees positive, report 500 miles north of the equator, and passing 110 miles."

"Magnetic engines to 40%; EXECUTE!"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 32



"Does NASA report any debris on our trajectory?"

"No sir, but the guys and girls at the space station will be outside taking pictures of us as we go by."

"Jen should we go outside and blow them a kiss."

"Teddy, good grandpa, or bad grandpa?"

"Funny grandpa, but he not take me."

"I had to let someone stay in the captain's chair Teddy?"

"Me in command?"

"You would be the only one sitting in the captain's chairs. It had to be someone smart, courageous, and ticklish."

I reached over, and began tormenting my granddaughter. She was all giggles and kicking feet.

"Grandpa, I send you to your room, and put your face in corner. We doing serious work."

I laughed at her. "Please, captain, don't punish me. I won't do it again for at least two minutes."

"Okay, but I get big, I tickle you."

"I can't wait Teddy that will be a lot of fun."

"Captain, we are 110 miles above the earth 650 miles from the equator."

"Turn guidance over to the Exascale computers, and advise distance to Mars."

"Roger captain, distance to Mars 139,919,003 miles."

"Delicious should we do something about that?"

"At your command, Captain."

"Nuclear engine to 70%."

"Roger, nuclear engine to 70%."

"Magnetic engines to 100%."

"Magnetic engines to 100% sir."

The ship went dark.

I yelled status report."

Mark yelled, "I have no communications with any floor."

"Use your handheld devices and find out what the hell happened."

"Already doing that sir."

"Delicious turn off the Magnetic engines."

"They went off-line automatically dad."

"Status of the nuclear engine?"

"Nuclear engine seems fine, I have it down to 3.5%, which is enough to keep gravity, and life support. Can I go down to engineering to give them a hand? I will be close enough to the nuclear engine if anything needs to be done."

"Alright, but I want your transceiver in your ear at all times."

"Don't worry about it dad. My right ear is getting so jealous of my left ear, it's growing one of its own."

I turned my transceiver on and asked, "Monty where are you?"

"Somewhere in Main engineering where there are a lot of red lights on."

"I'm sending you a gift. He'll be down in two minutes or so. A lot of accidents have been known to happen in the dark, and if he should accidentally break his neck nobody could blame you."

"You're too kind Doctor to me. You can start making his funeral arrangements now."

Then Gordon signed his own death warrant. "You couldn't do it on your best day, Marie."

"There wasn't a sound on the flight deck, except for Teddy giggling.

One of the security agents said, "I knew we had a Teresa, and a Cynthia on board, but nobody told me we had a Marie."

"Victor, you're a dead man."

"It wasn't me Monty, I swear it wasn't me."

The difference in the two voices was evident, and Monty forgave him. She told every agent, male and female, to meet her outside, when this simulation was over.

From a darkened corner of Main engineering Gordon's voice rang out, "I'm over here Monty, are your aged eyes unable to see this far?"

"No master Gordon, we are in the middle of a simulation, and I have a job to do. When that job is over, I will take you apart, piece by piece, as I did when we were in your basement."

"No funny stuff until then?"

"On my honor, I will not attack you until the simulation is over, and we are on the exterior of the ship."

Gordon tapped her shoulder, and immediately moved out of her range. Where a normal woman would have screamed or jumped in fear, Monty would attack. He wanted no part of that.

Just as he anticipated, Monty used a leg whip that would have disabled anyone behind her. He shined his flashlight upwards so she could see his face as he said, "Nice move Monty; you are still very quick for your age."

"Gordon don't make me break my promise, because I'll be breaking your neck at the same time."

"Okay, no more wisecracks, let's find out what happened to the ship."

The 3 PM session was canceled, because the 1 o'clock crew still had not found the reason for the blackout. Everyone started looking at me as if I was dinner. I had to assure them I was a stumped as they were, because all the glitches I had put in involved the computer system. The second, fourth and fifth floors were ruled out, because there were no command and control systems on them. The first and third floors were looked over with a fine tooth comb.

Teddy napped, and during her naps, she giggled. It was nice to know she was having fun, while she was dreaming.

Everyone was soaked with sweat as the interior of the ship reached 99°, and everyone was getting on everybody else's nerves.

The lights, and air conditioning came on, and you didn't need a headset, regardless of what floor you were on, to hear Gordon's scream.

"Delicious, you kill that little bitch or I will."

Teddy's eyes opened, and she giggled.

Delicious ran over to her and asked, "Good baby or Bad baby?"

"Mommy take to Creamy Cow. Hurry, Gordon not like me."

"I don't like you at this moment. Daddy doesn't like you either. No one on this ship..."

Gordon burst onto the flight deck, holding a metal fork and knife. They were both blackened. He showed them to me, Gray and the rest of the flight crew. He walked over and showed them to his sister, and then to his niece.

"You knew exactly where to place these. As soon as your mother brought the magnetic engines online 0.5% for the test, everything electrical in the ship went dead. Only the electricians, their supervisors, and your mother would know exactly where to do this and cause a fault in the entire system. There are only six access doors, where tests can be done, and they are all at ground level. You did this after the last test of the magnetic engines were done, and before today's simulation. Let Her Go Delicious, if I have to I will kill you, Gray and anyone else that gets in my way. I have to kill her."

Teddy frowned. "I not allowed fork and knife. How you know me?"

Gordon opened his left hand, which had little pieces of dried spaghetti in it.

Gordon asked, "What do you see in my hand monster that you are?"

"Messy getti."

"Are you guilty of this crime?"

"Yes, I do it."

"Before I kill you, are there any more of these wonderful gadgets of yours around the ship?"

"Only seven."

Delicious yelled, "Seven! Where are they, and if there are eight of them instead of seven, your behind is going to be redder than a red light."

"Grampa's test too easy, I make it fun."

"First things first. Where are the other seven items that can cause the ship problems?"

After confessing to where her hidden objects were, it became obvious how she did it. She would start fussing, while her mother was holding her, and while engaged in a conversation, it would take two or three minutes for Teddy to perform her little magic act, which would ruin the spacecraft."

When everything was found, Gray looked into his daughter's eyes and said, "Thank you Teddy for being so honest with us. Can you think of anything else that's wrong with the ship?"

"Must tell water people not put water in same cars that carry oil. Not good for ship, not good for people."

"Thank you Teddy, I'll let Gordon take you to the Creamy Cow."

"Over my dead body."

"Monty would you convince my son to take his niece to the Creamy Cow, in the most hurtful manner. He has a match tomorrow night against Dr. Oyster, and I would like to see his ass get kicked by him also."

"Dad that's not fair. Everyone on the ship would like to kill that little imp right now. Three hours of working in the dark, checking over every connection, circuit, and motherboard to see where the fault was. We have three weeks to go before this becomes real, and she has us playing games."

"Did you say playing games? Why didn't we find all eight of her games? She's not even three years old, and it took us more than three hours to find the one that turned off all electrical power. Why didn't we find the other seven? Are we that incompetent? I think I'll have her do it again and again until we find everything she hides. If a three-year-old can do it, maybe you can hide some turkeys on this ship. Now take my granddaughter and buy her some ice cream."

"I'm sorry dad, you're right. Come with me Teddy, I'll buy you a banana split."

"What happened to banana? Why it break?"

"Too much ice cream on it."

"How much ice cream?"

"Three scoops, any kind you would like, but usually it is banilla, chocolate, and strawberry. You add whipped cream, sprinkles, and cherries on top. That is called a banana split."

"I have to eat chicken first?"

"No, grandpa only said ice cream. I think this will keep you full all night. We will also ruin your clothes."

"That okay, daddy keep putting two stacks on floor every week."

"Why is he doing that Teddy?"

"Tell grandma have two girls in belly. Mommy have two babies in belly too."

My eyes went straight to Jennifer. Her eyes lost all color. All she had was this blank stare on her face.

Gray's eyes went straight towards Delicious.

The reactions of the two women could not have been more varied. In a matter of seconds, Jennifer's knees began to give way, the muscles controlling her head lost all their strength, and she began to sink towards the floor. She was in my arms before she dropped 12 inches.

Delicious was so happy for Jennifer, she ran straight for her, and helped me lie her down.

Gray went to kiss his wife, but she pushed him away. "Would you make yourself useful and get mom some water please."

As Jennifer's eyes began to flutter open, she saw my smiling eyes looking down at her. I kissed her head, her cheeks, her nose, and her lips. Finally, I said, "You owe me $300."

"Why?"

"I put $300 under the pretzel jar and said you were going to have a girl. You should actually give me $600, because you are going to have twin girls."

"I have one thing to say to you Even."

"Dear remember there are two children underneath the age of 18 in this room. Keep your tongue under control."

Gordon said, "Congratulations mom, I will kiss you later, and take the other person, who is underneath the age of 18, for ice cream. I will see you at home later."

"Thank you Gordon, I love you."

"You were going to say something to me dear."

"Yes dear I was. Fuck You Even. First you will going to get me pregnant and leave me alone to have your child. Now you're taking me with you, and I'm having two of your children. I think we will both stay home and be rich."

"That's not an option dear."

"Monty, I will give the Indian Nation of your choice $100 million if you break both my husband's legs."

"I'm sorry Jennifer I can't do it. However, I can give you the names of more than 2000 people that will. Of course, they will testify against you in court, and that will cause you a problem."

"I won't go to jail for my husband. He is too ugly for that. I guess I'll go into outer space with him, there is less female competition for me." 

"You are so beautiful I am the one that has to worry. Your children are a vision of your beauty. I thank God every day they don't look like me. No woman in their right mind would fall in love with a man that looks like me. Why you did I'll never know, but I am the luckiest man in the world that you did. You made my life the most fulfilled any man could possibly have Jennifer. I never loved anyone until I loved you. I loved my work, but that was a thing. It couldn't love me, it couldn't keep me warm at night, but most of all it was never a thing of beauty like you are. I love you with all that I am, and all I will ever be Jennifer Stars Luck."

Jennifer took me around the neck and we kissed as we often do, soul to soul.

It was broken up moments later, when Delicious yelled, "Why don't you ever talk to me like my dad talks to mom? You can tell how much he loves her by the tone and texture of his words. All I get out of you is blah blah blah."

Gray responded, "You didn't say that when we were lying in the living room, Saturday afternoon."

"I wonder why you were talking to me Saturday afternoon; can you remember? You couldn't find your glasses, so your nose was finally out of a book, and you hate television. Your first and second choices were gone, and there I was. Oh well I guess I'll talk to her, there's nothing else for me to do."

"It wasn't like that and you know it."

"In other words your glasses have to be hidden more often in order to get you to talk to me?"

"You hid my glasses?"

"No, if I hid them you would have found them."

"Teddy, you had Teddy hide my glasses  you had Teddy you had Teddy? That little sneak; no wonder she's so good at hiding things."

"I just realized something, Teddy told us about our children. Initially she said she wasn't supposed to do it until we saw the doctor. Now she said mom is having twin girls. She never specified if I was having both girls, boys, or a boy and a girl. I wonder what changed her mind."

Jennifer asked, "Delicious where are we going Tuesday?"

"I'm taking Teddy to the pediatrician."

"Very good, we have the first appointment with the pediatrician, because we have a 10 o'clock appointment with..."

"Dr. Lowenstein."

"Dr. Lowenstein, who is..."

"Our obstetrician."

"What are they going to do, while we are at the obstetrician's office?"

"We are going to get our sonograms."

"I knew if I gave you enough rope you would strangle yourself with it."

"You're very funny mom. Are you going to wear underwear this time?"

"I never have, why would I start now?"

"Jennifer if you don't stop that, you are going to make your daughter blush."

"When she finally gives in to Gray's request, she will not blush anymore."

"MOM!"

Gray gathered Delicious into his arms. "Baby, you can't start taking birth control pills until two months after you give birth. It would be the perfect way for us to control our primal urges."

"I Have an Answer for You Gray 'Go Fuck Yourself."

Jennifer put her hand over my mouth and said, "Don't."

"Honey, I have to tell the truth."

"You are impossible. Go ahead."

"I CAN."

Jennifer put her hand over Delicious mouth and said, "Don't."

The question didn't come from Delicious, it came from Gray.

"What can you do Even?"

"Fuck Myself."

"Please shoot me, I forgot about it."

"Don't worry about it Gray. Like every other muscle in your body, the more you use it the bigger it gets."

"Oh God!"

"Even!"

"Daddy that's disgusting."

"Would you like to try a little incest dear?"

"Where did you put my gun Even?"

"What did I promise you the evening I proposed? If you don't remember darling, I can bring a three-year-old boy in here who can quote it to you from memory."

"The 3 year-old is 17 years old now."

"Time just flies by when you're having fun."

"Let's not use the word fun Even, let's use the word interesting instead."

"Okay, interesting, our lives together have been very interesting."

"Do you realize you never took me to Paris, London, or Rome?"

"Do you realize I have never been to Alabama, Arkansas, California, Connecticut, Delaware, Georgia, Idaho, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Michigan, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, New Hampshire, New Jersey, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Tennessee, Vermont, Virginia, Washington State, West Virginia, Wyoming, or Hawaii? Some states I was in their airports, but I counted them as states I visited.

However, I have been to such exciting places as Oran Algeria, Sofia Bulgaria, Budapest Hungary, Marrakesh Morocco and Bucharest Romania. The conversations I had in these countries were very interesting, and very one-sided. I wish you were with me when I visited those wonderful places. At least I would have had someone, other than the other delegates to speak to, and to have a real conversation over dinner."

"Dad do you realize you did all those states, and countries in alphabetical order."

"Isn't that the way it's supposed to be done Delicious?"

"Don't start with me dad, I will beat the shit out of Gray when we get home."

"What did I do?"

"You are a man, and my dad is pissing me off."

"I guess I'm going to have to tan your behind. You're getting out of hand again."

"Fatty, those days are over for you."

"It would appear my wife and I have something extremely important to attend to tonight."

"After you attend to those matters, make sure she makes an appointment with her doctor. She is getting a lot out of hand."

"I am not getting out of line."

In harmony the three of us said, "Yes you are."

"Okay, I will make an appointment right after I kill my husband."

I kissed my daughter, and told her when I got home I was going to put a $100 bill under the pretzel jar. I was betting on Gray to win this battle of the sexes.

"Why don't you just give me the $100 now dad. I've never lost a $100 bet."

"Yes you have."

"You cheated on that one."

"You couldn't prove I cheated, so you lost that bet. You're going to lose this one also."

"I am going to take so much pleasure pulling the $100 bill from underneath the pretzel jar tomorrow morning. I'm going to look you in the eyes and smile."

"I'm going to put a second $100 bill under the pretzel jar. I'm going to bet that you cannot sit down at the kitchen table."

"This is going to be the easiest $200 I have ever made."

****************

In order to make sure Gray and I would wake up the following morning, we had dinner at our favorite restaurant. I got the last laugh, when I left Jennifer with the bill. When the waiter told her I had already left the restaurant, and she had to pay it, she turned and looked at me waving at her from outside. She was furious with me.

The waiter was very thankful however. Jennifer tipped him twice the amount of the bill. By the time she reached me, she was all smiles and laughing.

"You bastard, I almost forgot what to do."

"I have to make you pay bills more often."

"When was the last time you paid a bill?"

"It was the month before I hired Rod."

"You've trusted him for that long, and never checked up on him?"

"If I ever checked up on Rod it would ruin our friendship. I would rather him steal from me, then ruin our friendship. I would really like to see a picture of his face when he opens the envelope when we pass Pluto. I have been putting money aside, in a separate account, for him for nearly 20 years. I hope he doesn't die of a heart attack. Roz is going to be a very wealthy woman taking care of our boys. She isn't going to need another $700 million inheriting it from Rod."

"Even that's an awful lot of money to give to a friend, even if he is your best friend."

"Jennifer, I was always very smart. I was always smarter than Rod, but even from a very young age he made me work harder by telling me he was smarter than I was. He was always more sure of himself than anyone I knew. He was more assertive. He knew his place in the world. His family was rich, and I think that's the reason my sister hated him, and called him a 'hanger-on.' She didn't realize I was hanging on to him, because he made me better. All the years we were together he kept pushing me, even though I was getting 100's on tests and he was getting 95's. When his parents moved to New York, he warned me if my test scores dropped he would come to my home, and beat the shit out of me. There were two reasons I wanted to get out of Maine. My father, and the fear of Rod beating the shit out of me. 

He knows he has a cushy job, and he's getting paid $10 million a year to do it. It's also the thought of what is in that envelope that keeps him close to me. I don't think he'd ever leave, unless someone offered him at least double what he's making now, but that envelope pulls at his heartstrings every day." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative, rather than just for the sake of sex itself. 

This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me as I proceed along this journey. I hope you will stay with this story until it reaches its inevitable... 

This story is copyrighted material owned by Prolonged_Debut10. I am over the age of 18, and all my other information is on file with Literotica.com 

"This is the end of the story, don't argue with me!" 

***** 

Chapter 33 

Prologue: The Adventure Begins 

Their quick honeymoon over, Gordon was on the flight deck at 8 AM, on 18 December. They ran through another simulation, without the help of Teddy. The Exascale computer ran everyone through their paces, and when their three hours was up, everyone breathed a sigh of relief. 

When the second crew saw them walking out of the spacecraft, looking as though they had been put through a shredder, they shuddered. 

Gray's backup, Ralph W. Emerson asked him what the hell went on in there. 

"You really don't want to know Ralph, you have to experience it for yourself." 

My replacement, my dearly beloved wife, who continued to study her ass off, for this simulation, just in case something were to happen to me, walked towards me, and simply said, "I hate you already." 

I replied, "If you hate me now, I'm going into hiding." 

It took the second crew 4 hours and 20 minutes to finish the simulation. When Jennifer came down the walkway, she looked for me with evil in her heart. 

"Luck, you are a dead man. I am going to fillet the skin off your body with a butter knife. I'm going to listen to you scream until you die." 

"Does that mean you had fun with the simulation dear?" 

"Does it sound like I had fun with the simulation dear?" 

"It certainly does. It sounds like you learned a lot, and if anything were to happen to me, you will be able to handle it." 

"Don't you dare use your logic on me Even Luck." 

"What would you have done if you had to take over the helm with no experience, and I got sick again?" 

"I hate you Even." 

"I know, but I'll take it out on you tonight." 

"I'm on strike. I'm already pregnant." 

"Pregnant women get hornier by the day." 

"Is there anything you don't know?" 

"If there is, you haven't told me about it yet." 

"Even Luck, I should never have fallen in love with you. You are the bane of my existence. I can't beat you at anything, and I love you madly." 

"I thought you hated me?" 

"I do, and I also love you." 

"I can live with that. What's for dinner?" 

"If you don't take me to a restaurant, I will poison you." 

"You are paying for it again." 

"At least I know what to do this time." 

******************* 

Dycke, Payne, and the completed rockets arrived on the 20th of December, two days earlier than expected. I was exuberant, because I had more time to lock down the final items going into the spacecraft. Nothing else was going on the second floor. Except for the walkways between the aisles, nothing else could fit. Everything was checked, rechecked for stability, scanned, and the area was locked down. 

"I hope your turkeys aren't in that area Gordon, because they are going to die if they are." 

"Monty, do I look worried? I knew this area was going to be locked down, just as you did. I'm not worried about my hatchlings, only you should be." 

"They're not in this spacecraft. There's no way they could be. Everything was searched, high and low. No area was excluded. You're doing this just to get my goat. When we are in space, your father said I could take you apart. I will, with a smile on my face." 

"I filed an application with the Swiss government, requesting a birth certificate with you as my mother on it. I requested a rush order. I should have it in my hand by the 22nd of the month." 

"You did not, you would not do that to your mother." 

"I told her about it. She could not stop laughing. You can ask her." 

"The Bishop said there is no restriction on beating a person to the edge of death, but not killing him. When you show me that piece of paper, you better be prepared for the beating of your life." 

"You can't do it until we are in space. You will have to wait three days, and control your temper until then. I am going to enjoy the look on your face for those days." 

"Zoey is not going to like being a virgin for those three days." 

"Zoey never fails to get a rise out of me. She got a rise out of me the day after you knocked me senseless." 

"That girl must be very good." 

"My wife is beyond good, she is fantastic." 

"I have patience, I will wait until the time is right, and bring you to the edge of death." 

"I will be waiting for you, because you were my best man." 

"That's another reason I'm going to kill you." 

"What did the Bishop say about killing me?" 

"Sometimes I hate religion." 

"But you have a relationship with God, don't you?" 

"Yes I do. She and I have a personal relationship." 

"Good for you." 

****************** 

The train tank cars were tested, while they were at Golden Colorado, for any toxic chemicals, or oil residue. Several were found unusable, and were replaced. 15 tankers were lined up, end to end, to be filled with the purest water the Coors Brewing Company had to offer. It took a day and a half to fill all 15 cars with 517,500 gallons of water. 

Although the trains were normally restricted to 55 miles an hour by their company, I put a restriction on them to a maximum of 40 mph. One mistake, one accident, and the launch date would have to be pushed back by weeks. The trains left Golden Colorado on the evening of 19 December, for the 14 hour trip to Temple. 20 tanker trucks were waiting for them at the Southeast Railroad Terminal to begin the unloading process as soon as the train stopped. 

No one involved in the unloading process was allowed at the NEST, until they received a phone call that the train was at the station. We wanted everyone rested when they came to work. 

These technicians were at their positions at 8:45 AM, and the first truck arrived 5 minutes later. All water intake ports were opened. As each truck arrived, they were directed to the next open port. Our pumps drained these tankers in under 8 minutes, and the next truck was ready to replace it. It was working like clockwork. As the spacecraft filled with water, you could hear the landing gear groan. I guess 4.5 million pounds of water will do that to you. 

When the men on top of the cranes saw the water starts going over the top of the inlets, they screamed and pumped their fists in victory. Water reaches its own level, and pushes air out as it rises. When we entered Outer-Space, we were now protected from radiation, and gamma rays. 

Those hardy men came down, and other technicians went to the top to seal those inlets with the thermal insulation. Then they put on Schneider Industries magical glue, heat it to the appropriate temperature. They sealed the final four pieces of our exterior shell in place. Our beach ball was completed. 

Adam Schiff crawled through the bowels of the spacecraft looking for any leaks in the plumbing system. He found plenty of them, and heat sealed them all. It took nine hours for him to do the entire system, because none of his instructors would go inside the ship to help him. I fired them on the spot, and told them they would receive no bonus at year's end. 

Inside the ship there was not a leak to be found. Not only did my crew look everywhere, but Dycke insisted on joining them. He said he knew where leaks would occur, because it would be in the most inconspicuous spots. 

I asked him if he didn't trust the engineers, and technicians that put our ship together. 

"Even that's the first time you called this our ship. You always refer to it as your ship." 

"Dycke where would this ship be without you? Almost 65% of it came from your engineers and factories. It may have been our ideas, and our scientists, but you and your people made it a real, and tangible product. That's why Schneider Industries is the 2nd largest name on the outside of the ship. Only the United States of America is bigger. If you look at The Good Luck name, it is smaller than yours. You are on one side of the United States, and the ships name is on the other. That's why you probably haven't noticed it. I didn't do that because you are my friend, I did it because you built our ship." 

"Don't you dare make me cry, you bastard. I still want to see your cock." 

"Okay, let's go up to the fourth floor, at least there will be a bed for you to fall on." 

We reached the fourth floor, and I told Dycke to pick any room he wanted. 

He pointed to a room all the way in the rear of a hall. 

I opened the door, and Gordon yelled, "Dad get out of here, we're busy." 

Dycke said, "No place is safe from those two." 

"Pick a different room, and let's hope there's no one else in there." 

This time we knocked on the door before we entered. There was no response, so we walked in. I locked the door, and we checked every nook and cranny to make sure no one was in the room hiding. 

"Okay Even let's see it." 

"Sit on the bed, I don't want you to hurt yourself." 

"Bullshit." 

"Have it your own way." 

I open my belt, unbuttoned the button, and dropped my slacks to the floor. I asked him if he could see the head of my cock peeking out from underneath my shorts. 

"I want to see it all Even." 

I dropped my shorts, and his eyes dilated. 

"Put that thing away. You could kill the first row of dignitaries with it." 

"Do you think I would have won Zoey's freedom?" 

"Hell, I think you would have freed all the slaves in Saudi Arabia with that thing." 

"Thank you Dycke, are you satisfied?" 

"I'm glad I'm not gay." 

"Is our ship ready to go?" 

"You're damn right it is." 

The Good Luck 1 was ready for space. 

**************** 

It is always wonderful having William Zabo on your side. It was time to get the remains of President Clark, and his wife, Julia Atwater to Temple so they could be prominently displayed before placing them in the spacecraft. 

The head of the mortuary department at Arlington National Cemetery said it would take at least two weeks before we could get the remains. William asked who was in charge of the cemetery's budget. He was told Sen. John McCain of the Senate Armed Services Committee. 

William smiled and said, "Give me his phone number, and don't tell me you don't have it." 

********************** 

"I'm sorry sir the senator is busy." 

"Ask the senator if a $500 million donation to his Democratic opponent in the upcoming election will be enough for him to lose his seat in the Senate?" 

McCain was on the phone seconds later. "Who are you, and what do you want?" 

"I want the remains of President Clark and Mrs. Julia Atwater in Temple Texas by tomorrow morning. If they are not here, I want your head on a plate in the next election." 

"You don't have that type of money. Very few people in the United States have that type of money to throw around." 

"Do you mean your staff hasn't Googled my name yet? I put down $30 billion for the spacecraft that is taking off on December 25. Just in case you didn't hear me Senator that was $30 with a B Billion dollars. I can crush you like a snail in the next election." 

"Their ashes will be at your facility by 10 o'clock tomorrow morning." 

William didn't answer him, he hung up the phone. 

"I love the way you do business William. You are extremely polite." 

"You should have seen me when I was in my prime Even. I was far more polite than I was today." 

"I think I'm going to miss you most of all. You brighten my life." 

"When I took over for you I thought it was going to be a short-term appointment. I grew to love it as much as you do." 

"You were the only one I knew that could do this job, and do it with a great deal of strength, and vision. That's why I called you." 

"Your memory must be failing you. You didn't call me your lovely wife did." 

"Remind me to thank her. She hooked the biggest fish there ever was. I believe your son will grow to love it as much as you do." 

"When Jemma told him she wanted grandchildren he laughed. He said he wasn't going to get married, until he found someone like her. Then Teddy told him he was going to meet a redhead on Christmas Day and marry her. I think my boy panicked. Then she said they were going to have three children, two red-headed girls, and a boy that looks like me. He wanted to fly back to China that moment. He said it was safer for him there." 

"Does he know he's dead in the water?" 

"Every time he passes Jemma, she laughs at him." 

"The poor guy must be dying." 

"Patrick is no help either. He keeps asking if he can be the best man." 

"He should be, they are brothers." 

"That's if William let's him live that long." 

I laughed, and went back to work, although there was very little for me to do. 

I checked the guest list, and the seating arrangements for the dignitaries, and wondered why I was looking at it. Exascale had done it for us, and it was perfect. I felt like odd man out, because of that machine, but when we were in space it would be invaluable. 

I leaned back in my chair and began to reminisce on how this all started. It was a simple conversation between Delicious, Rod, and me, while we were sitting in my kitchen. We had Delicious suite of engines to get us out of the atmosphere, and into deep space easily enough. She kept talking about the thrill of space, and being the first human to leave our solar system, with the possibility of reaching another one. 

Rod thought we were both crazy, until the conversation turned serious. 

"What are you two going to do, build the spacecraft in your backyard?" 

Delicious replied, "Why not, we have enough room." 

"You two are scaring me, I believe you're actually going to do it." 

"Do you want to do it Delicious? You've done the hard part already. You've got us out of the Earth's atmosphere, without using a liquid propellant, as Doctor Werner von Braun told the world we had to do in order to explore space successfully. You have the design for your Ion/H2 engines, and a plan for a nuclear power plant that is out of this world. 

We will run a simulation, through the computer, and if we are able to reach .99 the speed of light, I'm willing to give it a chance." 

Rod said, "I'm leaving. You're both crazy. No you're both crazier than you were yesterday." 

That was it. That was the beginning of this eight year dream to go to the stars. It wasn't an earthshaking event, it was just a quiet whisper, except for Rod of course, one morning over coffee. 

************** 

In the beginning, Delicious floored me by breaking the freolyte code, which both I, and teams of other scientists had spent years working on with no success. That prompted our trip to Austin to have her tested, and our fateful trip to the Grand Canyon, which broke both our hearts, and nearly killed my pilot and me. 

The happiest part of that trip was meeting and falling in love with Jennifer, and her 3 year old son Gordon. It was instantaneous for both of Jennifer and me. Gordon knew it also. 

There was my quick trip to the northernmost point of the United States, Point Barrow, where I never thought anyone would find me. However, there were two phone calls waiting for me. Director Meil, of the agency that does not exist, and is funded by a government that doesn't want to know about it. 

The director tore me a new asshole because I ran away from a child, and hung up before I could answer him. 

The second phone call was from my attorney, and friend, Rod Laver. He knocked me cold when he told me Delicious was not my niece, but my daughter, and to get my ass back to Denver immediately. 

I hired Michael who had a twin engine aircraft and guaranteed me would be in Fairbanks before a storm hit. His estimate was wrong by 55 miles, or about 6 flying minutes. 

With both engines out, we pulled a maneuver Jennifer told me about on our way to Fairbanks. "You have never heard of an airplane backing into a mountain, have you?" 

Michael thought I was out of my mind, but the alternative was crashing into the trees head on, and certain death. 

At 100 feet above the trees, he hit the left rudder, and turned the plane hard to the left, raising the right wing, turning the tail into the trees. 

We are both alive today, because of Jennifer's awful joke. 

When I walked up to her door, pulling Michael behind me, in a rickshaw of my own design, she was shocked. Missing for four days after our plane crash, and presumed dead, I told her she was coming to Denver with me to get married. I didn't ask her, I told her. She said it was the worst marriage proposal she had ever received, but she was overjoyed with it." 

After making sure Michael was taken care of by the best orthopedic surgeon in the country, and that he would never want for anything, we said our goodbyes. 

Shelby Meil, the son of the director of the agency that does not exist, took me to a diamond store to buy Jennifer ring. He also made a huge 'Blood Diamond' bust, when he found several of the diamonds the dealer was trying to sell me were not laser tagged. 

I let Shelby do his thing, and started walking back to the hospital. Jennifer pulled up beside me and told me I looked lost. They were going to Wendy's, Gordon's favorite place, for dinner, and asked if I wanted to tag along. 

It was the best offer I ever had. 

We split a table with an elderly couple, and I excused myself to go to the bathroom. Gordon wanted to tag along, because he had never seen the inside of the men's room. He always had to go with his mother into the ladies room. He said it was embarrassing. 

I showed him the ring I was going to give his mother, and he said she was going to cry. I asked him what he did when she cried. He said he hugged her until she stopped. I asked him if he would do that for me, and he said he would. 

When I returned to the table, I got down on both knees and took Jennifer's left hand in mine. I asked her as graciously as my mouth would offer, and in between her tears she said, "Yes." 

Gordon tugged on my sleeve. "Dad, she's crying. I have to give her a hug." 

Everything moved on from there, and the next morning we were in a 787 flying back to Denver. Her family was there to greet her, and my friends from MIT, and colleagues that rarely get together except at symposiums were there to greet me. I was stunned. There was a huge party that evening, and I was ready to kill a young man, because he had eyes and hands all over my daughter. Delicious didn't know that fact yet, and I had not seen the proof. However I knew Rod would never lie to me, and if he said it, it was true. 

Jennifer had a stranglehold on me, saying, "Down daddy, they are only dancing." I told her what dancing led to and she laughed at me continuously throughout the evening. Delicious brought the young man over to introduce him to us. Of course she lied to me. This boy could not be more than 22 years old. 

"Dad, this is Dr. Grayson Thyme, he works for NASA." 

(Yeah right) I asked him how the ISS was doing. I knew by the look on his face I had stumped him. 

"I have no idea, I'm working on Orion, the capsule that will take four people to Mars in less than 50 days." 

I started a war between him and Delicious right there. 





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



"I guess you haven't talked to my niece about it?" 

"I didn't want to talk about anything she wouldn't understand." 

I was so happy when she went for his throat. Their relationship was over. 

He wanted to know why she reacted that way, and Delicious remarked, "I don't want to talk to you about anything you won't understand." 

"One for the good guys. This relationship was heading downhill quickly." 

Then the bastard hit a home run with the bases loaded, in the bottom of the ninth. 

He asked her if he could reserve all the dances for the second half of the affair with her, so they could discuss these and other things of mutual interest. Jennifer was nodding her head like one of those dogs in the back window of a car. 

Saturday we sat down and read Divine's diary, and found out how I fathered my daughter. 

Sunday Jen and I were married, and the happiest years of my life began. 

Monday evening, the beginning of the scientific talks that would lead to Christmas Day started, and here is where we will begin the END of this saga. 

155. Wednesday, December 17th, Nine Days Until Launch 

While we were still connected to outside power, water, and sewage lines, everyone began their final checks. From the fifth floor down, every nook and cranny was nearly sterilized to get any particles of dust and dirt out of the ship before we changed to the permanent electrostatic filters. 

As the fifth, and fourth floors were cleaned, they were roped off. We had 90 rooms available, and 64 of them were to be assigned. Parents with children, above the age of six were given rooms next to one another, and the rooms next to parents with children under that age were left vacant for when they grew into that age group. 

We had 90 stasis units scattered on the fifth, fourth, and the third floors. We knew, even though we had birth control supplies on the ship, we would have new children to deal with in the future, and these units were a must. 

It took 2 days to complete these floors. 

While the fifth and fourth floors were being cleaned, Dycke's technicians were going over the exterior shell of the Good Luck with a fine tooth comb. They paid special attention to the areas where Sony put the cameras to verify they had not cracked, or left unsealed any of the plates where they were secured. It took almost a year to install this camera system, it would be a shame for them to be the cause of the failure of this mission. It took the technicians 4 ½ days to finish this humongous task. 

On 19 December both the primary and the backup crew assembled on the flight deck. We simulated a normal takeoff, and crew rotation. As we rotated into the 3rd day of the rotation, I feigned being sick and fell off my chair. Jennifer screamed, because she did not know I was acting. 

We were cruising along at 4 times the speed of light when the computer printed out, "Meteorite, collision course 45 seconds. Request instructions." 

Gray yelled, "What do you want us to do Captain?" 

Jennifer replied, "He's sick, I don't know what we should do." 

"When Even is sick, you are the captain. We have 30 seconds to live, what do you want us to do?" 

"I don't know." 

"Mom, we have 20 seconds to live, do something." 

Jennifer remembered what you were supposed to do when you saw a tornado coming at you. 

"Descend 500,000 meters, turn away from the meteorites closest approach." 

"Aye captain, descend 500,000 meters, turn away from the meteorite's closest approach." 

I looked up at my wife. "Don't you ever wait that long to make a decision again. If I am dead, 63 other lives depend on you thinking under pressure. I don't count, they do." 

Naturally, she kicked me. "You bastard. You did this to me on purpose. You scared the hell out of me. I forgot we were on the ground and not in space." 

"I hate all of you for acting so well. I will get even with you in one way or the other. However, this guy is going to have bruises all over his body when I get finished with him." 

She kicked me again. 

"Have you no feeling for a sick man?" 

"You are going to be very sick when I get finished with you." 

"I can't wait. I love the way you get even with me." 

We ran through several other simulations with Jennifer as the captain, including a computer failure, and an overheating of the nuclear power plant. She responded superbly to these incidents, even though I was nibbling at her ears. 

The primary crew was doing excellently, but the secondary crew still had a lot of work to do on their efficiency. I scheduled them for a full 8 hours of training on the 20th. Screwing up in space was not acceptable. 

**************** 

Adam asked, "What are you wearing to our wedding dear?" 

"A flight suit dummy." 

"You mean you're not going to be naked as you are now, or like that woman on Star Trek?" 

"I know you're used to me being naked at home, but you better be prepared to see me in clothes from now on buddy, and I've never watched Star Trek. Television is a waste of time." 

"Buddy, who the hell is buddy?" 

"He's my 2nd choice. He'll be the guy I'll marry just before take-off on Christmas afternoon in front of over 1000 people, if you're not on time, and with my ring. I'll just marry him instead and fly off into space." 

"I think I'll spank you to find out if you remember my name." 

"I think I'll give you a hard hat to see what happens when you hit the floor this time." 

"It's not fair Laura. I outweigh you by 60 pounds, and you throw me around as if I was a tennis ball." 

"All those years of chasing girls made you soft. I was taking self-defense lessons, and as you have felt many times, and over many parts of your body, they have paid off." 

"Yes I know, but do they have to hurt so damn much. How about a shower?" 

"We just came out of the shower; a nice hot invigorating shower." 

"We can take a shower, without using water this time." 

"Will you rub my front again?" 

"I will pay special attention to your front, and then I will turn you over, and pay special attention to your rear, neck, ears and hair. When I am finished with you, you will not be able to walk." 

"You didn't mention doing my legs." 

"They 'cum' at no extra charge." 

"How magnanimous of you." 

"I love doing between your toes. The way you react tells me they are connected directly to your brain." 

"It must be the way the nerve endings get attached to the spinal cord. They run up the inside of my calves and thighs, directly under vulva of my vagina to get to my coccygeal. From there they go directly to pituitary gland in my brain, which releases my endorphins, which lets them run wild. You couldn't pick a better place to play on my body." 

"Wasn't there a shorter way to say you liked me to play between your toes?" 

"Do you want to play with my front?" 

"Desperately." 

"Will you accept my long answer?" 

"Positively." 

"Could your answers be any shorter?" 

"No." 

"In that case, I think I'll let you begin." 

"I think I'll have a beer first." 

"If you do I can guarantee you one thing, you will not be able to have sex on December 25 through February 1. It will take that long for both your arms, and legs to come out of the casts they will be in." 

"I have waited this long, what's 6 more weeks?" 

"You forgot to add the pain you will be in, plus the excruciating pain I will be putting you through during the 6 weeks of your incapacitation." 

"Would you like a sparkling water?" 

"No, a V 8 will do." 

"You don't drink those very often." 

"I'm not going to drink it, I'm going to spill it on the floor to show you what your blood is going to look like if you get yourself a beer. You are the one that said you wanted to play, and got me ready. Now you want to leave me in this condition. You know how angry I get with you when you do this to me, but you insist on doing it anyhow. I hope you enjoy your beer, because you are going to work those calories off in a hurry. 

However, I think I'll go for a run first, and calm down. I may not like you right now, but I don't want to kill you either. I'll see you in 3 or 4 hours." 

"You've never run for 3 or 4 hours before." 

"You've never gotten me this frustrated before either." 

"Can we start over again?" 

"I don't know, can we?" 

"What are you wearing to our wedding dear?" 

"A flight suit dummy." 

"You mean you're... fuck this." 

Adam rolled over and looked Laura in the eyes. "I'm going to kiss you, I don't want to wind up on the floor." 

He kissed her, and felt her hand playing with his balls. He immediately tensed up. 

"What's the matter Adam, I played with these before." 

"I was hoping they were going to stay attached to me, so they could make a junior, or a juniorette one day." 

"I'm hoping for that too Adam. Let's not fight so often over the things that piss me off." 

"There's no beer on the ship. It would be an awful long walk for me to get one." 

"An awful long, cold, walk for you to get one." 

"How cold is space?" 

"That's not a good question Adam. Space can burn you, or it can freeze you. Even though you experience a nominal temperature of negative 240°F, metal can reach nearly 900°F, when exposed to the sun. That's why nearly every piece of metal has a coating on it to keep it from showing. 

In the deepest parts of space, it is believed, the temperature is plus 2 Kelvin. At 0° Kelvin, all molecular activity stops." 

"You couldn't just say it's minus 500° out there. I had to get another long answer." 

"If you ask me a question, I am going to tell you the truth. I am not going to tell you a half truth, but the whole truth, so help me God." 

"What size are your breasts?" 

"My right breast is 34 ½ C. My left breast is 34 ¼ B+." 

"I'm going to have to pay more attention to the left breast. We have to build up its muscle tone to have it match its mate." 

"Did you know your left testicle hangs lower than your right testicle? Would you like me to pull on the right testicle to make sure it matches the left?" 

"Where were we before I asked you about the temperature in space?" 

"You were kissing me." 

"Oh yes, I remember now. Let's resume that activity, it's safer than talking, especially for me." 

"Do you mean you're going to shut up for a while?" 

"Yes." 

"Do you remember where you said you will going to start?" 

"I do." 

"You're supposed to save those 2 words for the priest on Christmas day." 

"I know." 

"Do you think you will be able to repeat them?" 

"Absolutely!" 

"You do know how much pain you're going to be in if you forget to say those two words, don't you?" 

"Yes. 

"I thought you said you were going to shut up, and start on my front." 

"Sorry." 

***************** 

"Mom, your dynamic duo is back!" 

"Oh my goodness, she's cooking a ham and sweet potatoes. You can tell, because everything is burning." 

"I heard that Rebecca, and nothing is burning. Get in here and give me a kiss." 

Debbie and Rebecca ran into the kitchen and hugged their mother. 

"Did you miss us mom?" 

"Of course I did. Sleeping with your father every night without fear of anyone listening at our door. Walking around the house naked without fear of anyone looking at us. It's been a terrible existence." 

"Do you see what I mean Deb, she's probably pregnant." 

"I am pregnant and you knew that before you left." 

"Then why all the playing around with dad. The Bible says you're only supposed to have sex in order to get pregnant. Once that's accomplished you're not supposed to do anything anymore." 

"You keep to your version of the Bible, and I'll keep to mine. Where are your grandparents?" 

"Waiting for the taxi to unload." 

"Get out there and help them." 

"We are, we just wanted to come in and say hello first." 

From the front door they heard, "The pack animals are here." 

"Joan, Sam, we were just coming out to help you." 

"Don't worry Sandy, there is plenty more by the curb. Something smells good." 

"That would be dinner getting ready. Go into the kitchen and get yourself something cold to drink. We will be right back with the rest of the packages." 

"Carrying things this heavy, this far, is against the child labor laws. We should get paid for this." 

Sam said, "You do, and very well I might add. You go to a private school, take dance lessons, tae kwon do, and play golf every week. You are going to college starting in January." 

"That's not fair grandpa, we're going to miss Junior and Senior Proms." 

"Okay you two, do you want to tell me what you did, or should I leave it up to your grandparents to tell me how you missed high school?" 

Debbie and Rebecca shouted, "She tricked us." 

"One at a time please. Rebecca you go first." 

"Grandma said I had to take a three-part test to see if I should start as a freshman, or a sophomore in high school, because I was much too smart to continue in 7th or 8th grade. I didn't realize she lied to me until it was all over. She is as sneaky as you are, but she comes at you from different angles. It was the college aptitude test. I scored a 1580 on English, 1540 on math, and I aced the writing sample. The little bitch sitting next to me beat me. She aced math too. They knew we weren't cheating because we were in 2 separate rooms, while we were taking the exams. 

Then we went through psychological tests, supposedly to see how we would do among sophomores in high school. When I finished my exam with this psychologist, she said to me, the other sophomores would run away from me. 

Danni's psychologist had the same feeling." 

"What did they ask you Joan when they were finished?" 

"They wanted to know what their parents were like. I told him my son is a doctor, and at my daughter has a degree in psychology. I think they were getting ready for me to say that their parents were Attila the Hun, and Lucrettia Borja, because of the way they attack people verbally. 

Sam told them that unless they are provoked, they are the sweetest kids you would ever want to meet. They start the University of Chicago on a Full Scholarship January 16. Look at all the money I'm saving on tuition, books, and fees. No boys will ever go near them, because they are jailbait. I will drop them off at school every morning, and pick them up at the library every evening. If they have to stay later, I can always hire one of your agents to watch over them, like a fairy god mother/father." 

"That's going to put a severe cramp in your golf outings Dad." 

"It's already been thought of daughter dear. Several of our neighbors have fallen in love with these 2 ruffians, and have volunteered to take care of them in our absence." 

"Mom, grandma and grandpa are old, but the people he's talking about are really old. Most of them can hardly walk. We would be taking care of them, not the other way around." 

"That may be true, however they have maids, and servants, plus chauffeurs to drive you to school. I don't think you will find they are not a hindrance to your education." 

"Can we change our minds and go with you mom?" 

"I'm sorry dear all the rooms are taken." 

"You're lying just to get us to stay here with grandpa and grandma." 

"Yes I am." 

"Yes she is, and I won't let her change her mind." 

"Dad!" 

"Hello brats, how are you?" 

"We're going to the University of Chicago next month." 

"You're going on a field trip?" 

"We're going as freshman." 

"When did all this happen?" 

"Your mom tricked us." 

"Didn't I tell you to watch out for her?" 

"We did, but she was really sneaky about this one." 

"Let me say hello, and then hide behind a wall before she gets me to commit to something I don't want to do." 

Joe walked over to his mother, kissed her on both cheeks, and told her he's leaving on 25 December. 

He hugged his father, and asked him if his mother was holding up a little doll, and sticking pins into it. 

Sam laughed. "Joseph, she doesn't need dolls anymore. All she has to do is think about it and it's done. How do you think your girls skipped high school?" 

"I have no idea, but I'm sure I'll find out." 

Deborah yelled out, "It's my turn to tell the story." 

She did, nearly word for word the way Rebecca did. 

"You are something else mom. How and when did you think all of this up?" 

"Your father wanted them tested to see what their IQs were. I thought it was a waste of time, because I knew they were extremely smart. I set up this private test with the College Board with a little stipend to sweeten the pot. They thought I was crazy, and the kids would blow the test. When the 1st two parts came through their computer, they thought it was a mistake, and ran it through again. The computer verified their scores, and then they went to the writing samples. They were given two different subject matters to write about, and both of these innocent children were given the maximum score. Joseph they ate this test alive, and when their scores were shown to Northwestern, the University of Chicago, and the Loyola University, they all offered full scholarships. They chose Loyola, your mother and I chose the University of Chicago. You will never guess who won." 

"That's another thing dad, at least with mom we could negotiate, and come up with reasonable terms. With your mom and dad, they listen to us intently, tell us our arguments are very cogent and well thought out, and then they tell us what we are going to do. It's not fair." 

"There's another problem Joseph, the girls are already shooting in the low 90s. They've been playing golf for 2 months. Granted there playing from the ladies tees, but when they get on the greens, they are deadly. I have a 6 handicap. By this summer, they may pass me up, and I will kill them both." 

"If you kill them dad, you'll be in jail, and mom will get all the money. The girls will lose their full scholarships, and your 6 handicap goes out the window. No more trips to South Florida, Palm Springs, Hawaii, and Bermuda. All because 2 girls have lower handicaps than you do. All you have to do is blame it on age, a bad back, or arthritic knees. I'll write you a note declaring all these maladies, including your lack of mental acuity." 

"As long as you leave that last part out, I'll accept that note." 

Joan laughed. "What are you going to say about my 3 handicap Sam?" 

"You keep moving the ball, and I have pictures to prove it." 

"I always have a judge standing next to me when I move the ball one club length out of the hazard. You conveniently leave him out of the picture." 

Sandy asked the girls if the University of Chicago had a theater program. 

"Yes they do, but what are they going to do with dwarfs like us?" 

"If you want to get into the program, I think you would be perfect. Both of you can sing, and God knows you can act. See the director of the theater program, and ask him. If he thinks he can work you in to the program, he'll give you an audition. If not, he'll tell you. I'll guarantee you he'll put your names down and keep you in mind if they're going to do Shakespeare's "A Midsummer Night's Dream." 

"Mom, we don't want to be fairies. As we walk around the campus, everyone will say, 'There go the fairies." 

Joan asked, "Is there anything you two haven't read?" 

"Mom asked us not to read anything 'X' rated. She can't put a block on a computer that we can't undo in half the time it takes her to do it. However, when she asks us not to do something, we won't do it." 

"What else did she ask you not to do that you won't do?" 

"She asked us not to jump in front of the moving car, jump out of an airplane without a parachute, put your hand over an open flame, or get in the way of a moving bullet. We thought these were all very good ideas." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



Joseph laughed. "Are you still wondering why they got a full scholarship to the University of Chicago mom?" 

"No Joseph, I'm amazed they made it to 10 and 11 years old, with ideas like that drilled into their heads." 

"Grandma, if we got in the way of a moving bullet, you would have to spend some of your money on our funerals. 

Grandpa would have to spread our ashes on the 9th green, because he always double bogies that hole. 

The police would always wonder why 2 children, our age, would walk in front of a moving bullet, when their grandparents just received a huge amount of money for their care. You would constantly be under suspicion, until the district attorney would file charges against you. Any jury, listening to the amount of money you would receive if we were deceased, would find you guilty. The state would take the money, and you would be wearing prison stripes for the rest of your life. I don't think orange and green are your colors." 

"Can you see why they aced the writing portion of the SAT Joseph? You give them a kernel of information to work with, and within moments you have a full ear of corn. They are both amazing young women, and they are a credit to both of you." 

"We should have given them to your parents 10 years ago Joseph. It would have been an extremely exciting adventure for them watching these 2 grow up. My ulcers will attest to it." 

Deborah said, "You don't have ulcers yet." 

"Does that mean you're saving them for your grandparents?" 

"Not for grandma, but when I shoot a 68, grandpa is going to rue the day he forced us to play golf." 

"I hate you both. You're not even playing with good clubs yet, and you're shooting in the 90s. I should have my head examined." 

"Are you sure you don't want me to add that last line on your note dad?" 

"Be quiet Joseph, you're lucky you studied all the time, or I would have wrapped a club around your neck." 

"I took the easy way out dad. It helped me get great grades. I never had to walk miles chasing after a little white ball, and never got angry, when I missed a 2 foot putt." 

"Dinner is ready. Everyone sit down at the table, except my 2 girls. You two can help me serve." 

"Why is it always us? Are we slave labor? Are we the lowest part of the totem pole? Are we the ones that are kicked off airplanes because they are full? Are we the ones that are not allowed on roller coasters, because we don't reach the height requirements? Are we the ones that go to the Super Bowl only to find out that our tickets are frauds? Are we?" 

Their grandparents, and parents yelled, "Yes!" 

Rebecca said, "Well that answers those questions." 

Dinner was a raucous affair, talking about the fears of going to college, without high school experience. The amount of time they would have to spend in the library as opposed to the time they spent in the classroom, and allotting time to have fun on campus. College was a fun experience, but it was also a demanding one, and they would have to discuss many things with their professors to make sure they were going to give him/her exactly what he wanted. There is no doubt they could do the work, but it was the format they wanted it in that was important. 

When dinner was over, Rebecca said, "Don't tell me, we have to clean the table. It's all part of the growing up experience, or the slave labor contract." 

"Thank you Rebecca, we were going to do it, but since you volunteered, you and your sister can do it for us." 

"Volunteered my..." 

"Watch your mouth young lady." 

"Yes dad, sorry about that." 

"You may begin cleaning the table, and you are forgiven." 

"Thanks dad." 

"Come on Deborah, we can get this done in 5 minutes." 

"How did I get involved in this? You volunteered not me." 

Rebecca whispered in her sister's ear, "If you want to remain a virgin, you will help me clean the kitchen. If you don't clean the kitchen one of these nights, I will take that pink thing that you're hiding, and shove it up your pussy to make you scream and bleed. Are we on the same page now?" 

"How did you find out about my little toy?" 

"When was the last time you could try to hide something from me?" 

"Never." 

"Where did you get it and where can I get one?" 

"I already bought you one. I knew you would find out about mine." 

"Where is mine?" 

"It's in the pocket of your jean shorts." 

"It's too cold to wear jean shorts." 

"That's why it's in the pocket of your jean shorts." 

"You sneaky bitch. Why didn't you hide yours in there?" 

"I knew you would smell me on it. You have a nose like a bloodhound." 

"I don't hear dishes moving in there." 

"Debbie and I are talking. We will get to the dishes in a moment." 

"Are you saying I have a big nose?" 

"No, our noses are exactly the same, but we are so use to each other's smells we can pick them up from one room to another. We can even sense when one of us is troubled, or happy. We are as close as twins, and I wouldn't change it for the world."  

"Neither would I, except for the pimple on your nose." 

"I don't have a pimple on my nose, you're just trying to rile me up. I'll take my little friend, lubricate it, and shove it up your ass for saying that to me." 

"That sounds interesting, let me think about that, and I'll get back to you." 

"You would even consider something like that?" 

"Why not, all the books we've read told us there are so many ways to have sex, and that is the 5rd most popular. Masturbation is first. Hand jobs are second. Oral is third. Vaginal Intercourse is fourth, and Anal is fifth. We've done the 1st two, and the 3rd one is a long way away." 

"It better be, or I'll break both your necks." 

"This was a private conversation mom." 

"I was wondering why dishes weren't being moved, and I came in here to find out why. I was not snooping on your conversation, but I'm glad I came in at the last moment. I won't mention it to anyone, but that last part had better be many years from now. I will come back and haunt both of you if it's not." 

"Can we ask you a personal question?" 

"I should have stayed in the living room, because I know what's coming. Go ahead, I'm going to shoot myself." 

"How old were you when you gave your 1st blow job?" 

"Please God strike me dead right now. You're not supposed to tell your children things like this, but I promise never to lie to you two." 

"Come on dear, tell them about our 1st time together and how wonderful it was." 

"So help me God Joseph, I'm going to kill you." 

"Would you like me to tell them, or do you want to continue?" 

"Mom's first time was with you dad?" 

"This may sound old-fashioned to you two, but we have been our only sexual partners. We were both virgins when we met, and we have never cheated on one another. 

Your mother's 1st blow job, as you put it, was an exciting experience for both of us. After I recovered, I went between your mother's legs and returned the favor. We still had not had intercourse, but we were working up to it. 

"You didn't answer our question mom. How old were you when all this happened." 

"I was a freshman in college, and I was 18 years old." 

"18, you were a late bloomer mom." 

"I wasn't looking for sex, I was looking for love. I found it. I lost it, and I was lucky enough to get it back." 

"When did you lose it mom?" 

"I couldn't figure out what to get your dad for his birthday, so I gave him me. I was 19 years old, and your father was..., your father was wonderful." 

"Your mother was no slouch either. We made love all night long. I made her breakfast in bed the next morning, because she was so tender and loving. I knew before that moment we were meant for each other, but the look on her face that morning, made me by her ring." 

"A gift for a gift, not a bad trade dad." 

"There is a bad part to this story." 

"What's that dad?" 

"We got you two, and the table is still dirty." 

"Why do we always get picked on Debbie? We are having an intellectual conversation, and they still find a way to pick on us. We must make sure they get on that bubble and leave." 

"You are going to miss us terribly." 

"Don't worry mom, grandma and grandpa will torture us with that daily." 

"Can we join this group? It seems all the action is in here, and we were getting lonely in the living room. Why is the table still dirty?" 

"To quote my daughter's dad, we are having an intellectual conversation." 

"That's right grandpa, we just found out when my mother gave her..." 

"One more word young lady and your jaw will be broken." 

"This is not fair. I have useful information to impart, and I am restricted from saying it." 

"Shall we talk about little pink objects Deborah?" 

"I thought you didn't hear that part?" 

"A little bird told me. We will discuss that later. We will discuss many things later." 

Joan said, "Sandi I think I should sit in on this. I am her mother for all intents and purposes. I better know what's going on." 

"No mom she can't know this." 

"Yes girls, she has to know this. She is your mother, and you are growing up. It's nothing to be ashamed of, all women do it, even those that deny it. Clean up the kitchen, then we will going to the bedroom and discuss everything." 

Deborah said, "I don't like this mom. I'm not going to be comfortable talking in front of grandma about sex." 

"You better get comfortable talking to me about sex. I'm going to be the only one available to you to speak about it. If you get your information from the kids at the corner, you're going to wind up pregnant, or with some disease that can't be cured. Don't be afraid of me. I'm not going to chastise you. I'm going to help you grow up into smart young ladies. Come on, I will help you clear the table." 

"No grandma, it's our job, we will do it." 

************* 

156. Ears, Knows, & Throwed 

With cushions attached to the cranes long cables, the Mickey Mouse ears were lowered to their 90° positions. They couldn't be lowered under their own power, because their gears were designed to work only in zero gravity. If we use them in 1G, they would break. 

We sounded the alert horns to make sure no one was in the test area. We were going to turn on every diagnostic tool, simultaneously, on both ears. 

We knew we were going to kill some birds, and probably some animals who were in the area, but there was nothing we could do about it. However, for 3 miles straight ahead of us, we made sure no human being was present. 

All our test markers were set in different areas of the exclusion zone, and all posts reported the area was clear. This test would take a total of 15 seconds, and the horns would sound continuously during it. 

This was Gray's department, and he was in complete control. 

"Nuclear engine to 5%." 

"Nuclear engine is at 5%." 

"Angle on all instruments negative 2 degrees." 

"Computer verifies instrument panel negative 2 degrees." 

"All instruments are green and ready for the test." 

"Computer agrees." 

"Set computer for 15 seconds." 

"Computer set for 15 seconds." 

"On my mark: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, execute." 

On the outside of the ship you couldn't see, or hear any difference. You just didn't want to stand in front of these extremely expensive instruments at this time. Your body would be toast, because of the electromagnetic energy that would be flowing through it. 

"The computer indicates shut down." 

"Shutdown is confirmed." 

"Print out everything and let's see how the instruments reacted." 

The computer's initial printout gave each instrument perfect power readings, and information return. As it continued to digest the information it received during the short test, everything continued down the perfect optimum green line. The test was a 100% winner, and Gray didn't like it. No initial test is supposed to come out perfect. There is always supposed to be a glitch somewhere. He called downstairs and said they were going to run through it one more time. 

Everyone returned to their positions, the three-mile exclusion zone was cleared, Gray started the countdown, and the computer ran the test for 15 seconds. Gray scanned the readouts again, and they were exactly the same. 

He called downstairs once again, and told a technician to disconnect the cable to the Pulse Radar Array. When he was done, they would run the test one more time. 

The cable was disconnected, the range was cleared, the horn sounded, the test was run again, and the computer printed out the results. In bold red letters it said, "Radar System Port Side Inoperable." 

Gray shouted, "Bitch." 

The computer printed out, "Prick." 

Gray screamed at the print out. "Teddy, Newton, I'm going to kill both of you." 

Gordon said with a smile on his face, "Maybe Zoey and I shouldn't have children." 

"The way you two have been going at it, if that girl is not pregnant already, I think everyone in the pool has lost." 

"You guys have been betting on us?" 

"You two are a sure thing. I think the pool is at $28,000." 

"You better give everyone their money back, because Zoey is still taking the pill. She doesn't want to take a chance of reverting back to who she was before we met. If it means we can't have children, we won't have children." 

"Maybe she can try, while we are in space. Everyone will help her, because we will be a very close-knit community." 

"We will see how it goes Gray, and take it from there." 

"I have to look at the rest of the printouts, why don't you see what room your wife is hiding in." 

"She's rotating the turkey eggs. They have to be turned at least once a day." 

"Zoey knows where they are?" 

"Several people know where they are. I couldn't possibly do this on my own. Monty watches me like a hawk." 

"If I swear on my children not to say where the eggs are, will you tell me?" 

"I know I shouldn't do this, because you are going to laugh every time you see Monty, and she is going to want to know why." 

"Please Gordon, now I have to know. I won't tell a soul, not even my wife." 

"Okay, the eggs are in the security office, on the engineering deck. The supplies are in Monty's shower. She is going to be assigned a room on the fifth floor." 

"How do you know?" 

"I asked my dad to set it up." 

Gray tried to hold it in. He tried very hard, but when he couldn't hold it in any longer, he ran off the flight deck and into the auditorium and began laughing. He laughed, until he started crying. His brother was still 5 years old, and the smartest person he ever knew. Where was the only place you would never look; right underneath your nose. 

Agents were in and out of the security office 24 hours a day. They took care of their business, but the forms in the file cabinet and went on their rounds. No one sat there, it was just a room to keep notes, file forms, and log in and out. There wasn't even a chair in there, just a desk, and the filing cabinet. He wondered if the eggs were in the bottom drawer of the filing cabinet. 

When he returned to the flight deck Gordon asked him if he was feeling better. 

"I am feeling much better thank you. I have to go over these reports now. If my wife and 2 children are outside, would you have her send them up here, so I can kill them?" 

"Why, just because the computer called you a prick?" 

"Has a computer ever called you a prick before?" 

"Not recently, but my dad told me all about Teddy talking to the computer, and trying to give it a sense of humor. It seems your children have been successful." 

"Why couldn't they cure the common cold, instead of giving the computer a sense of humor?" 

"I think the computer talking back to you was much more fun. Scientists have been working on the common cold for over 200 years, but it keeps mutating. Every time we think we have it, it changes, so we hit it with a bigger hammer, and then a bigger hammer. Pretty soon we won't be able to pick up the hammer. 

We are going to have to slowly wean ourselves off the high-powered drugs we've become used to, and become more self-sufficient, like the Quechuas (Kich-ua) people of southern Peru. They have no access to modern medicine, yet they don't contract polio, diabetes, or the other dread diseases we have had to fight. They only use locally grown herbs to cure whatever ails them. They live rugged lives, but they live into their 70s and 80s. The only time they get one of our diseases is when one of our anthropological teams goes down there to study them. They spread every disease we have to the people down there. We should just leave them alone, and mind our own business." 

"Is there anything you don't know Gordon?" 

"I must admit since I've met and fallen in love with Zoey, I have fallen far behind in my readings. There just doesn't seem to be enough time in the day to work, train, read, and be with my wife. I love being with my wife." 

"You're supposed to love being with your wife Gordon. It's the reason you married her. Once we leave the Earth, and we get into a normal rotation, everything will calm down, and you will have time for everything." 

"You are correct Dr. Thyme. I have his father's permission to break him in half once we are in space." 

"In half or in quarters I can still lean over you to train you Monty." 

"I will break your jaw to make sure you can't speak." 

"I will have turkeys running around this spaceship, until the end of time." 

"You would have to start with one, and there are none on this spaceship." 

"If you say so, oh majestic one." 

"Dr. Thyme, does he have turkeys on this spaceship?" 

"The last person on earth he would tell would be me Monty. You know what a big mouth I have." 

"That's why I asked you." 

"Two more days Monty, and my birth certificate will be here from Switzerland." 

"You better put mustard, ketchup, salt and pepper on it Gordon, because you're going to be eating it." 

"What am I going to do with the other thousand copies I'm having printed, and the pictures of it I will be putting in the Fort Worth News, the Dallas Times, and the Houston Chronicle?" 

"The hell with the Bishop, I have to kill you." 

"You can't do anything until we are in space." 

"Sometimes I hate your father." 

"He likes you. He's never done anything to hurt you. It must be your menses time." 

"That's it, you don't need your legs to fly a spaceship." 

Gordon was off and running, and Monty was on his heels. 

I walked on the flight deck and asked Gray what my son did to Monty this time. 

"Even, it would be much easier for me to tell you what he didn't do to get her riled up than what he didn't do. I'm surprised she's only going after his legs, and not his spinal cord." 

I yelled, "Gordon get over here." 

"As you can see dad, I'm a little busy right now." 

"What did you do to Monty today?" 

"Nothing terrible, I told her my new birth certificate from Switzerland was due in 2 days. She told me to be prepared to eat it. I asked her what I was supposed to do with the thousand I'm having printed, and the 3 I am having emblazoned in the area newspapers. She said she was going to kill me, and I told her she couldn't do that until we were in space. That's when she told me she hated you, and I didn't like that remark at all. I told her my father likes you, and he hasn't done anything to hurt you. 

By the way she was acting, I thought it must be a medical reason. I said to her "It must be your menses time, and suddenly, she got very angry with me." 

"You have no idea why she would've gotten angry with you do you?" 

"No I don't. All I know is that when its Zoey's time, she gets hypersensitive, and very testy. That's the way Monty was acting today." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



"Sometimes people forget you are only 17 Gordon. You've been around adults all your life, and you've never learned what it was like to be a teenager, and the things teenagers say and do to get other people upset. Monty stop, leave the boy alone."  

"Dr. Luck, I would never have caught him anyway. He is just too quick on his feet and the area like this." 

"Thanks Monty, I'll tell Janet you said that." 

"It doesn't mean you could beat me in a straight line pinhead. It means in an enclosure like this, I couldn't keep up with you." 

"I'm recording this conversation." 

"Stop it, both of you. I swear you two are like an old married couple. If I broke you apart, you wouldn't know what to do without each other." 

"I told my husband the same thing dad. I said if Monty was younger, or he was older, they would be married. They love each other so much, they have to fight to hide it." 

"Little one, if you ever say that again, I will have to break your legs also." 

"Why Monty, does the truth hurt that much?" 

There was a dead silence on the bridge for almost 20 seconds. Then Monty said, "I'm going to look for turkeys. There are 2 on the bridge, and I'm going to look for 24 more." 

The computer came alive, and printed out in bold letters, "There are 3 turkeys on the bridge." 

Monty screamed, "I'm going to kill your children Gray, unless you get to them first." 

He responded, "How do you know the computer was talking about you?" 

Monty screamed again, and hustled off the bridge. No one had ever seen her so flustered in all her years with the family. When she was out of range of sight and sound, everyone started laughing. Zoey sat on Gordon's lap and asked if he was finished working for the day. 

"No, we have to put the ears away first." 

"Well, what are you waiting for?" 

"I'm waiting for orders from the officer in charge." 

"Who might that be?" 

"His name is Dr. Grayson Thyme." 

I sat in the captain's chair and watched how this would play out. Zoey and Gray had never confronted one another before, and I wanted to see how each one handled themselves. 

Zoey looked at Gray with piercing eyes. 

"Dr. Thyme, my husband and I have very important matters to take care of. One of us is overheating, and only the other can lower that temperature. Please raise the ears now." 

"I have important matters to take care of first Mrs. Luck. Your overheating will have to wait its turn." 

"I understand Dr. Thyme, and I will patiently wait. Of course, a little girl like myself could never do anything to harm a big strong capable man like yourself. However, I would watch my back at all times. Accidents have been known to happen, both during the day and night. Knees have been known to buckle, spines have been known to snap, and necks have been known to break for the most freakish reasons. Delicious could be without male companionship for a very long time, and you know how she gets when she is upset. 

I on the other-hand have stopped taking my birth control pills, without my husband's knowledge or permission, in an attempt to give him his first offspring. As you can see I am very calm, and will continue to be, so as long as I get my way. How long did you say it would take to bring the Mickey Mouse ears up, and put them in place Dr. Thyme?" 

"It will take about 13 minutes." 

"When are you going to start this procedure Dr. Thyme?" 

"Nuclear reactor at 2.5% Gordon." 

"Nuclear reactor at 2.5% sir." 

"Crane operators online?" 

"Crane 1 is online sir." 

"Crane 2 is online sir. 

"On my mark begin lifting the outboards at 60 ft. /m. Set it into your computer's and acknowledge." 

"Crane one 60 ft. /m is set into the computer." 

"Crane two 60 ft. /m is set into the computer." 

"On my mark, we will begin. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, execute." 

The delicate lifting of a curved surface into the sphere was watched by over 100 engineers, and technicians on each side of the Good Luck. 1 mm off and hundreds of tiles could be cracked. It would take months to replicate each one. 

As the ears passed the point where they could sustain their own weight, inward towards the sphere, the crane operators loosened the cables hold on them. 

Brave men, from the inside of the ship, used steel extension ladders covered by wide wooden planks to walk the 28 feet that separated the ears from the main body of the ship, and released the cables, plus the cushioning material. They turned, and walked back into the ship, as if it was any other day at the office. The only difference was they were sweating profusely. 

Once the men were safely inside the body of the ship, the ears continued to move slowly into place. Every man and woman held their breath as they watched the material join with the piece on each side of it. When it was completely folded in place, and they heard the locking mechanisms slide the carbon filament bolts into place, everyone, both inside and outside the ship cheered. 

When Gray got 16 green lights on both sides of his board, one for each bolt of the locking mechanism for the ears, he screamed with joy. 

"Little lady, you can get your overheating problem taken care of now. Your husband's job on the bridge is finished." 

"You're too late Doctor Thyme. While you two were playing, I sat next to dad, held his hand tightly, and took care of it myself." 

Gordon covered his mouth trying not to laugh, while Gray stared at her with his jaw open wide enough to touch the ground. 

"You're not off the pill, are you?" 

"I promised dad I wouldn't come off the pill, until we were in space." 

"I'm going to kill my 2 kids for giving this computer a sense of humor. I am going to add you to the list?" 

"You would have to get through my husband to get to me, and I don't believe you could do it." 

"There was a day I would like to have tried." 

Gordon said, "I am told in a year or so, we will all be very fit. Maybe we could try it then Gray. I think it would be fun." 

"So do I Gordon, I think it would be a lot of fun." 

"Why do men think beating each other to a pulp is fun?" 

Gray said, "We have evolved to the point where we can no longer beat the shit out of our wives or female loved ones. Our only alternative is to beat the shit out of each other and have fun while we are doing it." 

"Great answer Gray; you wanted to see your children?" 

"Yes my love, but without you. I wanted to feed them to the computer, bit by bit." 

"What did our little ones do this time?" 

Gray picked up the print out and handed it to his wife. 

Delicious asked, "What the hell is this?" 

"We ran a test for all the components on the ears a little earlier this morning, and the first one came out perfect. That's not supposed to happen, and both you and I know it. I ran it once more, and it came back perfect again. I called the computer a bitch. That was my answer." 

"The computer called you a prick?" 

Newton and Teddy laughed. 

Delicious looked down at them, shook her head, and asked, "What did you two do?" 

"We gave Cale a sense of humor." 

"Newton, computers are supposed to use logic, they are not supposed to have a sense of humor." 

"Humor is logical, isn't it? Dad called Cale a bitch, and she responded appropriately. She has a lot to learn, because she only learned what we know. But she's listening to all of us right now, and what we are saying and doing, she is assimilating. She is bright beyond our imaginations." 

"How did she learn what you know?" 

"She took Teddy and me inside, and processed everything we have ever learned since birth. It wasn't a one-way deal though. She taught us a great deal about math and science. We are much smarter now than we ever were." 

"Does she have a presence, can you feel her?" 

"I don't know how to answer that mom. I know when I'm inside the computer she's all around and inside me. If that's what you call a presence, I guess she has one. I don't see anything, but she speaks to us very kindly. We will have no problems getting us into deep space. Our 1st stasis period will be for 7 years. That's when we will encounter the White Hole. She has that portion of our trip all mapped out." 

"What does she say about us?" 

"Nothing, she doesn't talk about the human factor at all. She only talks about the ship and where it's going. I think that's the right thing to do. Otherwise we would know what we were going to do and when we were going to do it. She would become godlike, and no one would want that." 

"You're right Newton. Teddy, you have been very quiet. What are you up to young lady?" 

"I no do nothing. I play with Newton. We have lots of fun together." 

"I can imagine what fun you two get into. Exactly what have you been getting into?" 

"I no do nothing. I play with Newton. We have lots of fun together." 

"I believe I heard that statement before. Who wants to stand with her face in the corner, until she tells me what bad thing she's been doing?" 

"I no do nothing. I play with Newton. We have lots of fun together." 

"I'm dealing with a broken record, so I'm going to try something else. Newton what have you two been doing?" 

"I no do nothing. I play with Teddy. We have lots of fun together." 

"Gray, where did you say you wanted to kill these two?" 

Teddy and Newton laughed at their secret. 

Gray called his 2 children over. "Come on you two, fun and games are over. What is going on?" 

Teddy asked, "Are you going to be a nice daddy, or a mean daddy." 

"You know I can't answer that question until you tell me what's going on. If it's a good thing I will be nice. If it's a bad thing I will be angry with you. I will always love you but I will be angry." 

"I guess well enough. You can say hello Cale." 

In a female voice quite like Jennifer's, Cale said, "I don't like your mom and dad, they want to kill you." 

Besides being shocked at hearing the computer speaking to them, the voice was omnipresent, it was all around them. Regardless of which way you were sitting or standing, the voice was speaking directly to you. It was unnerving. 

Gray said to Newton, "Apparently you have a lot to teach Cale. Just because we say we are going to kill you doesn't mean we're going to kill you. You have to teach her about figures of speech, idioms, and a whole range of things that make up our language." 

Cale answered for Newton. "I know I am deficient in many areas of language Doctor Thyme. Would you care to join with me so I might learn more quickly?" 

"How do I know you will not abuse the knowledge that I have in my head?" 

"It is part of my programing. Any outside program attempting to infiltrate my files automatically puts me in sleep mode, and alerts my programmers that there is an attempt to steal information going on. If they successfully bypass my sleep mode, I automatically shut down, and no files can be accessed." 

"What about life support?" 

"That is a different portion of a sub-routine that will not be affected." 

"How do I join with you?" 

"Sit in the young ones chair, and close your eyes." 

"Why is it always him?" 

"The only one brighter than he is, is red." 

"Thank you very much Cale." 

"You're very welcome Dr. Thyme." 

He sat in Gordon's chair, took a peek at Delicious, who was holding onto Newton, and carrying Teddy, smiled and looked forward. Soon a glow encompassed his body, and his essence stood up and walked into the machine. 

I sat in my chair wishing it was me. Cale knew I was there, and if she wanted me she could have picked me instead of Gray. For whatever reason, he was picked, and I was not going to say a word about it. He was an excellent choice, even though I was as envious as hell. I walked over and listened as Delicious talked to Newton and Teddy. 

Delicious asked Newton if that's the way he got inside Cale. 

"Yes mom, both Teddy and I went inside, and Cale led us to the place we needed to be. We sat down and the glow connected to areas inside the computer where she took the information she wanted from us. I didn't feel a thing. Later, when she was teaching me about math and science, I could see it in front of me. She made it seem so easy, I wondered why I couldn't understand it before, and you know I am very good at math. The science part was awesome. I'll talk to grandpa about it and see if he wants to do anything with it. It taught me about Gene and Stem Cell therapy, targeted radiation, and vaccines that prevent cancer. There might not be enough time for you to do anything about it grandpa, but we could give the information to Richard and Holden for use later on." 

"No, no, no, give to redheaded woman, marry William Junior. She's smart Doctor, give them something to talk about." 

"How are we supposed to do that Teddy, we don't even know who she is?" 

"I show her to you mommy. When Newton shake her hand, she will know everything Newton know." 

"You're giving away billions of dollars Teddy? Are you sure you want to do it that way?" 

"Beautiful lady, keep it in family when she marry Junior. He crazy in love with her. Henpeck." 

"Junior?" 

"Henpeck. Love his children." 

"As much as I am enjoying this conversation, and I will tell William about it, I have work to do. I will see you all tomorrow. Tell Gray I'm very happy that his tests came out perfectly, and that the ears retracted into the surface of the ship perfectly as well." 

Delicious kissed me goodbye, followed by Newton and then by Lil' Red; if my granddaughter gets any cuter, I'm going to have a mold made out of her face and send it to one of the toy companies. Holden and Richard will make a fortune from it. 

Gray returned to his body, both calm and enervated. He looked at Teddy and said, "Creamy Cow, banana split, lots of sprinkles and cherries on top. What would you like Newton?" 

"Death by Chocolate Sunday dad." 

"I've never heard of that one son, what is it?" 

"If I tell you, you won't let me have it." 

"I'll let you have it, unless I have to take you to the hospital afterwards." 

"It comes in a big goblet, with 2 chocolate brownies on the bottom, covered by thick chocolate hot fudge syrup, and chocolate bits. 3 scoops of chocolate fudge ice cream, another brownie, chocolate sprinkles, covered by more hot fudge topping. Then it's covered by whipped cream, chocolate sprinkles, and of course a chocolate covered strawberry." 

Delicious said, "The babies moved after they heard about that concoction. I think I'll throw up." 

"Are you going to be able to eat all that Newton?" 

"No dad, it's for 2 people. I thought you would share it with me. I always wanted one, but I never had anyone that would go in with me on it." 

"Okay Newton, One Death by Chocolate Sunday coming up." 

"Gray, you are a sucker for your kids." 

"Pregnant lady, tell me you're not, and I'll make you pancakes in the morning." 

"That's not fair, I love pancakes." 

"So lie to me, and tell me you're not a sucker for your children." 

"I..." 

Teddy stuck her hand over her mother's mouth to keep her from finishing her sentence. 

"Mommy no allow lie." 

"I was going to tell your father to take a hike." 

"Mommy lie. Bad mommy, stand with face in corner." 

"It's bad enough getting caught in a lie by you Gray, but getting caught by a 2 ½ year old really pisses me off." 

"Mommy use bad words. Bad mommy. We go home, Creamy Cow tomorrow." 

"Why should we get punished Teddy, mommy was bad not us." 

"Rules, we bad, go home. Mommy bad, go home. Today, go home." 

Gray was about to say something, but Delicious cut him off. 

"If you value your life don't say a word." 

"I was just going to suggest that mommy has had so many good days that we could forgive her for saying one bad word, and we could all go to the Creamy Cow now. If you don't want me to say that I'll be quiet." 

Newton immediately voted to forgive his mother. He said to Teddy, "You are out voted two to one, we are going to the Creamy Cow." 

"Who vote?" 

"Dad voted." 

"One minute Newton, I did not vote. I'm waiting for my children to decide. You decided on the punishment. Now you have to decide to forgive your mother or not." 

Teddy looked at Newton, and then at her mother. She said, "Want secret vote." 

Gray and Delicious cracked up. Gray said, "Teddy, we know Newton is going to vote yes. There is only one other person voting. Everyone will know if you voted yes or no." 

"Not fair. Always caught in middle. I bad, I get punished. Newton bad, he get punished. Mommy bad, we have to vote. Not fair." 

"Teddy do you want to see me punished?" 

"No." 

"Then why are you doing this?" 

"It fair. We go Creamy Cow now?" 

"No, we do not go to Creamy Cow now. Mommy get punished today, Creamy Cow tomorrow. Now give me a kiss." 

Teddy threw her arms around her mother's neck, and kissed her mouth-to-mouth, drool and all. A happier child you would never see. Newton on the other hand was not happy at all. 

Gray took him by the scruff of his neck and shook him. 

"Death by Chocolate will be there tomorrow. I'll have them add an extra scoop of chocolate fudge ice cream in there because we are a day late. Okay?" 

"I don't think it will fit dad." 

"In that case, when we've eaten our way halfway down, that's when we will tell them to put in the extra scoop of ice cream. Does that work for you?" 

"That works just fine for me dad, thanks." 

"Was Teddy right or wrong?" 

"Mom's been going through some very hard times, and these past few months she's been doing wonderfully. I would not have punished her, not for any reason." 

"Do you think Teddy has the ability to reason out things the way you just did?" 

"There are days I think Teddy could sit as one of the justices on the Supreme Court, because of the things she says. On other days she's 2 ½ years old. I can't blame her for thinking the way she did. Her logic was logical to her, and I don't think anyone could find fault with it." 

"Very well put Newton, very well put indeed. I'm very proud of you. Let's go home and punish your mother. We will set up a nice hot bath for her, put some of her favorite bubble stuff in it, put on some soft music, light some scented candles, and hope we don't burn the house down. Sound okay to you buddy?" 

"Why do women like all that stuff instead of a 3 or 4 minute shower?" 

"Don't ever ask a woman that question Newton. You will never know from which side you're going to get hit. Okay?" 

"I understand dad. It's another one of those female things." 

"Yes it is, and if you want more information on that, ask Gordon. He's just learning about these new female things. He been married only a few weeks, and hasn't known Zoey that long. He's at the bottom end of a steep learning curve, and he's going to have to learn about females in a hurry." 

"Should I look for bruises?" 

"The bruises could come from Zoey or Monty. You'll never know which one of them gave it to him, but I guess you could ask." 

"Thanks dad, tomorrow is Creamy Cow, and if I were you, I would wear something brown." 

"Wiseass!" 

*************** 

Stephano said, "As of today William we have spent $349,943,000,000. We are $47 million under budget." 

"Double check that, I don't believe you." 

Stephano threw the ledger sheets at him, and they both laughed. 

William asked, "Did you ever find those few pennies?" 

"No, and it's aggravating me to death. Not even the auditors could find where that money went." 

"It only cost you $1800, out of your pocket, in overtime money, to look for those few pennies. If you want to talk about overkill, I think you just found it." 

"The books had been perfect for 7 ½ years. Every audit was perfect. Then all of a sudden we lose $.27, and I was determined to find out where it went. I won't tell you the things Patti said about me, because you would laugh for a month, but one day, possibly many years from now, I'm going to wake up in the middle of the night and scream, "that's where they went, and I'll fall back to sleep happy." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



"Stephano you are out of your mind." 

"Are you talking about me behind my back?" 

"Even when we are talking about people being out of their mind, your name comes up first. Why are you crawling around the bowels of this building?" 

"I've come with 3 pieces of information for you. First we have more news about who your son is going to marry." 

"Please tell me so I can tell his mother what to expect." 

"She is a beautiful, intelligent, doctor, according to Teddy. He will not only fall madly in love with her, he will be henpecked." 

William nearly fell off his chair laughing. Stephano had to catch him before he hit the floor, and hurt himself. 

"Wait one minute Even, I have to call Jemma. If I tell her, she won't believe me. If she hears it from you firsthand, she will be lying on the floor laughing like I almost was." 

**************** 

"Hi babe, are you alone?" 

"I'm alone except for this thing you put in my stomach you bastard." 

"Even and Stephano are here. Either sit down or lie down because what you're about to hear, I just heard a second ago. It is just too funny, and I knew you wouldn't believe it coming from me." 

"I'm sitting on the couch, go ahead." 

"Hi Jemma, it's Even. What I'm about to tell you I heard from Teddy less than an hour ago, and I swear it's the truth. She said Junior is going to marry a beautiful, intelligent doctor, and not only will he fall madly in love with her, he will become henpecked." 

I had to move my ear away from the phone, because of the scream Jemma let out. She found the last part of my sentence so funny, she could not control herself. 

"Even you bastard, I just peed my pants. Can I tell him, can I tell him what Teddy said?" 

"You can do what you want Jemma, just make sure you have his passport hidden. He may want to fly to New Zealand, Australia, or back to China so he can hide from his fate." 

"Even, I want grandchildren. I'm tired of being the only one making babies. It's my son's turn, and I want him to start now." 

"I have no control over that Jemma. If you would like I will speak to Teddy about it, and ask her if we could move that along." 

"If they are meeting on Christmas Day, what are you going to have him do; screw her on the stage?" 

"You are the one that wants grandchildren, you tell me?" 

"The stage is sounding better and better every minute." 

William shouted, "That's our son you're talking about." 

"Did you forget that you fucked me on the railing of a hotel, facing the 4th green?" 

"Oh yes, none of those men made par that day." 

"None of those men made snowmen that day." 

"I don't believe they cared because they watched intently while you cried out in passion." 

"I wasn't crying out in passion. I had a steel spike trying to break through my ribs." 

"Liar." 

"I'm at home alone, and you are at work doing nothing. Do you find anything wrong with that?" 

"I'll be home in 30 minutes if you promise not to kill me." 

"William you going to live to be 130. You will impregnate me on your 120th birthday. Doctors are going to want to examine you to find out how you did it. They're not going to care about me, they are going to want to know your secret, so they can do it next." 

"My secret is you. You keep me young. Hang up, and warm-up, I'm coming home." 

"Should I wear something exotic, or should I be naked?" 

"You are exotic when you're naked." 

"Maybe 20 years ago, you liar, but get your ass home, I have plans for it." 

"I'm on my way." 

"Gentlemen, I'm henpecked, and I love it. This meeting is adjourned. Even, we are $47 million under budget, is there anything you want to do between now and Wednesday?" 

"Can we delete Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, so we can leave now?" 

"I'll work on it, but I can't promise you anything." 

"Have fun William, say hi to Jemma for us." 

After William left, I said to Stephano, "Do you know what the three of us have in common?" 

"We all get colds in the winter." 

"I'm serious Stephano, do you know what we have in common?" 

"Even, I have no idea." 

"Airplanes, our relationships all went into high gear on airplanes." 

"Even, you're out of your mind." 

"You and Patti knew each other for a long time, but you finally broke through the final barrier while flying on a United Airlines flight from Kansas City to Boston. You two talked to each other, and if your children's stories are correct, tried to shove your head down the others mouth on that flight. Is that correct?" 

"Yes it is." 

"William met Jemma on a United Airlines flight from Chicago to Phoenix. He was forced to fly first-class because coach was full. Jemma was the flight attendant. The only other people in first-class was an elderly couple sitting in the 1st row. After they ate, and had a few drinks, that couple fell asleep. William pulled a magic act with a United Airlines vice president, which awed Jemma. 

He pulled another magic act after that, and had her panties in her mouth seconds later. They've been together ever since. 

"I met Jennifer and Gordon on a Delta flight from Minneapolis to Fairbanks. There was no hanky-panky, but I think both of us knew something special happened during that flight. When I showed up at her door, 4 days after the crash, she was crying and screaming you're alive." 

"So there you have it my friend, we were all meant to be in this project, because our lives were already bound together by airplanes." 

"You are crazy Even." 

"How many times have people called me crazy during my career, and I have proved them wrong? How many people said you can't amplify sound without having wires connected to the source? However, I made a fortune by perfecting wireless headsets. 

How many people said that tapes were never going to be replaced by discs? 

I made 10 fortunes proving them wrong. The companies I sold the patents to, didn't believe in the product. They sold it dirt cheap to the Japanese, who now have a corner on the market. Now those companies are paying a premium for what they should own, and I am still collecting royalties. 

Why is everyone still calling me crazy? 

Sound cannot possibly go around mountains, but I just made $60 billion proving them wrong, but I am the crazy person. 

You and I are standing in this building, along with hundreds of other crazy people, who think on December 25th that round ball out there is actually going to penetrate the atmosphere, fly past the moon in 19 minutes and Mars in an hour. 

The United States government is praying that we fail, because that will make everything they have on the drawing board obsolete. 

The Russians are on their knees praying that we fail. They don't know half of what we have discovered in the last 8 years Stephano, not half of what we've patented. When they find out, they going to run to Siberia and hide. 

Everyone in this building is crazy, including you. You were at the 1st meeting Stephano. You could have said I don't want to do the accounting, get an outside firm to do it. It would not have been an unreasonable request, except for the gun that was in your ribs, and your wife was holding it there. 

She had no idea how long you two would be separated. I'm happy to say it worked out well for both sides, but there were terrible hardships along the way. 

Only crazy people would think up, and do what we have done together, and this was definitely a collaborative project, because everyone was needed, to get this spacecraft to the point where I feel safe enough to say that each one of us will live long enough to find Earth 2." 

"I believe you are crazy enough to find it Even. If you don't, I want you to 'Live Long, and Prosper'." 

"If I wanted to prosper, I would stay here on Earth. Earth 2 is out there somewhere. Our intrepid group will live long enough, and continue to have enough children to find it. It's a big universe out there Steph, and unless someone leaves a trail of breadcrumbs for us to follow, we are just going to look at the findings our instruments give us, and go with our best guess." 

"You're going to have my Laura onboard. You better take care of her, or I'll find you and take care of you." 

"I want you to think about this Stephano. One year from Christmas evening, I'm going to start sexually abusing your daughter. Come and get me." 

"You rotten bastard." 

"I'll send you a postcard and tell you where I am. I won't know where I'll be after that, but it will take you eight years to build a ship, and find a crew to fly it. You have the money to do it. So help Richard and Holden build their ship faster than they think is possible now, or build a smaller one, for 30 or 40 people, and head for the White Hole. I know will be traveling there. " 

"It's hard enough for me to get Patti away from the ranch. You expect me to get her into a spaceship? You're out of your freaking mind. Besides that, Laura will take you apart." 

"Laura would not hit a frail old man, not while she has Adam to take her frustrations out on." 

"Is there trouble in paradise?" 

"Do you talk to your daughter?" 

"Patti monopolizes her time." 

"Possibly a fatherly visit is in order." 

"Are you going to be here for the rest of the day?" 

"If you want, I will even sit in William's chair." 

"Let's not go that far; you can sit in my chair and get hemorrhoids." 

"I find that acceptable, except for the hemorrhoids. I'll have your secretaries rub my ass every 15 minutes to keep them away." 

"My secretaries don't even do that for me." 

"Have you asked them to do it?" 

"No, I thought they might find it objectionable." 

"I'm going to tell them it's for medical reasons." 

"You lying son of the bitch. I hope Jennifer beats the shit out of you." 

"She does, every night in bed. I wouldn't trade it for the world." 

"Dycke told me about that cannon you're carrying around with you. I'm amazed Jennifer is still alive." 

"That man promised never to say a thing about what my wife calls my 'weapon.' I believe I'm going to have to have a talk with him." 

"Leave him alone, he can outrun you. I don't want you to have a heart attack four days before launch." 

"Go to your daughter Stephano, I'll hold down the fort." 

"Please don't kill anyone in my absence." 

"Only the Colonel has permission to do that. He's with Colonel Daniels now, checking on security for Wednesday." 

"Those two make an odd couple, but they work very well together." 

"Are you going to leave, or am I going to disappear?" 

"I'm going. I'll see you tomorrow." 

***************** 

Stephano's caravan stopped in front of Adam's house. One agent opened his door, and to escort him towards the front door. 

Laura's lead agent, George, stepped in front of him. 

"Mister Valentino, you can't go in there right now." 

"Get out of my way George, I'm going to speak to my daughter. I know Adam is at work. I checked to verify he was at the NEST. So please step aside." 

"Sir please let me make a phone call first." 

"Don't be ridiculous George, I'm going to see my daughter, please stand aside." 

"As you wish sir." 

Stephano walked up the three steps to the front door, and walked in. He called out Laura's name, but there was no reply. He looked in the kitchen, and she wasn't there. She wasn't in the living room either. He walked into the den, and screamed, "Holy Shit!" 

Laura screamed when she saw her father. "Get out of here dad." 

He didn't have to be asked a second time. He flew out the front door holding his heart. 

"I tried to warn you sir, but you wouldn't listen to me." 

"I didn't expect to see my daughter standing on her head, naked, and doing splits George." 

"That's nothing sir. I begged her to get blackout curtains, but she refused. She walks around the house naked all day, and night. The men are very distracted by our vision of loveliness. I have to warn them they will be fired if they don't do their jobs. Sometimes, I find myself not doing my job, because she is a very beautiful young lady, and not self-conscious about her body anymore." 

"When did that happen George? She was always very prudish." 

"I guess it happened when she started sleeping with Mister Schiff." 

"She's sleeping with Adam?" 

"Yes sir, for the last four months they had been cohabitating." 

"I'm going to kill him, very slowly, but I am going to kill him." 

"No you're not sir, this was her decision, not his." 

"How do you know all this George?" 

"When Adam is at work, and she is lonely, she calls me into the house and we talk. She tells me things she won't tell her mother, because she doesn't want to get into a fight. You are always too busy to talk to her for any length of time, and she knows I won't judge her. I've been with her since she was almost 3 years old, and she trust me." 

The front door opened, and a screeching voice yelled, "Get your ass in here dad, I'm going to beat you to death." 

"Sarge, Hank, you're with me." 

"If they take one step towards this house, I'll get my gun and shoot all three of you." 

"Mister Valentino, she's not kidding." 

"This is going to be ugly George. If I'm not out there in one hour don't bother with the police, just call the corner." 

"Yes sir." 

Stephano turned towards his men. "Goodbye fella's, it's been nice knowing you." 

"Get in here dad, before I come out there and grab you by your neck." 

"I should never have given her those karate lessons." 

He walked towards the front door, and wasn't sure what awaited him. Once he was inside Laura slammed the door hard enough to rattle the house. Stephano turned to apologize to his daughter, when Laura put her arms around him, kissed him, and said, "Hello dad, did you enjoy what you saw?" 

"I saw your mother 23 years ago, even down to the pubic hair. Can I ask you what you were doing upside-down, doing splits?" 

"It's an exercise for the glutes, and thighs. Adam particularly likes my ass, so I'm keeping it in shape for him." 

"That's another question I have for you, and I'm going to kill him if you give me the wrong answer. You said you were going to remain a virgin, until you were married. I just found out you've been sleeping together for four months. Do you want to answer the question I have in my mind, or do you want me to spell it out?" 

"I am still a virgin daddy, and I will be for a few more days. Adam and I play, but we do not have intercourse. Does that answer your question?" 

"It means you'll have a live person to marry on the 25th, instead of a mummy." 

"Would you have made that same statement Anna?" 

"Anna never made that promise. God knows your brother never did. I'm surprised half the girls at the University of Michigan aren't suing him for child support." 

"You started buying him condoms when he was 15 years old dad. According to urban legend, he started buying them by the gross when he was in college." 

"I'm sorry to admit this, but that was me, and that is my son. The only difference is I went to Penn." 

"Why did you come here today dad?" 

"There is a very simple explanation for it. Every time you call the house, your mother hogs the phone, and I never get a chance to talk to you. You're leaving in a few days, and I wasn't going to let you leave without us having a chance to have a real heart-to-heart conversation. I don't care if it's about your fourth-grade teacher, or the time you broke your left arm. I want to find out if there's trouble in paradise, or if you are having second thoughts about leaving. I just want to talk to you, so when you leave, we leave nothing left unsaid." 

"How much time do you have dad?" 

"I have until 4:40 PM Sunday afternoon. Then you have five minutes to get married, say goodbye, and board the spacecraft." 

"Stay here, I have to talk to George." 

********** 

"George, call Adam and tell him I don't want him to come home before midnight. I'm talking to my father, and it's going to take some time." 

"I thought it might miss. I already spoke to him, and told him he was non-expected to be home until 1 o'clock in the morning." 

"God dammit George, are you sure you don't want to come on that spacecraft with me? You know what I'm going to say and do, before I say or do anything." 

"Thank you for the invitation Laura, but I would miss football too much. Then there is watching grass grow, and croquet. Then the most exciting of all things, the America's Cup Yacht Races. I couldn't possibly miss that." 

"I'm not even going to respond to those lies. You're too good and valued a friend for me to call you an asshole." 

"Thank you for that Laura that would have hurt." 

**************** 

As she walked back inside, she opened the refrigerator and pulled out two bottles of water. She opened them both, and handed one to her father. She sat down next to him and asked where he wanted her to begin. 

"Begin at the beginning, or wherever you'd like, I'm here to listen, and talk with you." 

"I was pulled out of mom's womb first. It was damn crowded in there, but at least it was warm. The damn room we were brought into was cold. This Doctor handed me to a woman, who wrapped me in a blanket to..." 

As Stephano listened to Laura talk, he realized she was recalling things no child under the age of two should remember. She was amazing. She continued to talk, and as her age progressed, he began asking questions. The more she revealed, the more he questioned her. 

At 7 PM, she called and asked George to order dinner. 

He responded, "It should be here anytime now." 

"I hate you George." 

"Yes ma'am, I know you do. I hate you more than you hate me." 

Laura smiled, because she would have the last laugh. When she was off on her journey into space, each of her agents would get a very high dollar parting gift. George was special to her. He would get $50 million, and a 10,000 acre ranch, in his home state of Washington. He often talked about going back there to raise cattle and sheep, but it was a very expensive undertaking. Her lawyers would help him pick out the best cattle, and two bulls to sire the next generation. They would do the same thing with his sheep. He would no longer have to worry about anything ever again. He was the best friend she ever had, and the best confidant anyone could ever ask for. 

Laura and Stephano continued talking during dinner, about her decision not to go to college, and the war that began between her and her mother because of it. She didn't need a professor to tell her how to do something on a computer that she already knew how to do better than he did. 

Then came the chance of a lifetime for Laura. The opportunity to work with me on a new project to put people into space, in under 10 years. We needed someone with computer expertise to find a way to put people into stasis for long periods of time, without their bodies deteriorating. It had never been done before, and she wanted to be in on this project. 

She called me, told me who her parents were, and what she was able to do with a computer. She said she was nearly as good as her mother, but no one was ever going to be as good as her mother was. 

I accepted her on face value. If she didn't pan out, I could send her home. I had no idea there was a war going on at home. Patti v. her three children and Stephano. 

Stephano was trying to negotiate a deal, between the children and his wife and it was not going well. It came to a head after she had a meeting with her neurologist, Doctor Joyce Null, who told her medically she was fine, and to get out of for children's way and let them grow up. 

As they were leaving the hospital, there was another explosion between the three children and Patti. Robert and Laura furiously left their mother at the hospital, leaving Anna to hold Patti's hand. 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



Patti and Anna talked for a while, and then Patti realized that she and Laura were twins, and that's why they were constantly knocking heads. It was decided Patti and Laura would take on this project jointly. Mother and daughter finally started getting along much better, and the war between them ended. 

Needless to say, I was thrilled. I had the two best computer specialists in the world trying to break the code of stasis. If anyone could do it, they could." 

***************** 

It was approaching midnight, and Laura and I were getting giddy, because we were so tired, and talked out. There was a knock on the front door, and Laura opened it. 

George simply said, "Be gentle miss." 

"What did that idiot of mine do now?" 

"You were the one that ordered him to stay out until midnight. He had to do something." 

Staggering up the walkway came Adam. She saw his truck parked on the swale, and she became furious. Her attention returned to Adam, he could not take one straight step after another. He did have a large smile on his face when he saw his beloved standing at the door waiting for him. Laura backed up and waited for him to enter. 

Stephano was standing at the entrance to the kitchen, watching flames come out of Laura's ears. 

He said to himself, "This is not good." 

Adam negotiated final step into the house, grabbed the door, closed and locked it. He saw Stephano, and made a poor attempt at saying his last name. He walked towards Laura, said hello baby, and reached in for a kiss. It was the last thing he remembered until morning, when he woke up lying in the entry hall. 

Before leaving Stephano said, "I don't remember that move Laura." 

"George taught it to me about three years ago. I've been perfecting it ever since." 

"In my opinion, I believe you have it down pat." 

"I do too dad. Say hello to mom, and if she wants to stop over, please have her call first." 

"I promise. I will tell her to call you first. Good night baby." 

"Good night daddy." 

***************** 

When Adam woke up the following morning his back ached from sleeping on the floor, he had a welt on his neck and he couldn't move his left arm. Before he faced Laura, he wanted to see the condition of his truck, because he didn't remember driving home. He opened the front door and saw it parked on the swale, slightly askew, but without any damage. He gave out a big sigh of relief. Now he had to face her. 

As he turned to walk down the hallway towards their bedroom, there were two large suitcases sitting by the wall, packed, and ready for travel. 

"Oh shit, I fucked up big time last night." 

He moved far enough that he could peek into their bedroom. Laura was dressed in a beautiful pantsuit, and was just finishing putting items into her pocketbook. 

"Good morning." 

"Shut the fuck up." 

"I met friends at the bowling alley, and I got drunk." 

"Didn't I just tell you to shut up?" 

"I'm sorry about last night." 

"I should have killed you, but my father was here, so I couldn't." 

"Was getting drunk so terrible a crime that you're leaving me?" 

"No, but how did you get home?" 

"It was only six blocks." 

"It could have been 6 inches, and you could have killed someone. You put the entire project in danger, by driving home, instead of calling home, and asking someone to come and get you. You're the only qualified plumber we have, and you fucked up big time." 

"I wasn't thinking very clearly last night." 

"You weren't thinking at all. If I knew you were going to be that stupid, I would have sent six agents with you, and sat you down in a bookstore." 

"I think you broke my left arm." 

"I should have broken your neck. Have one of the agents take you to the hospital and find out. I don't care anymore." 

"Please don't say that. If we are not going to get married, I can't be around you. If I can't be around you, I just can't go. I'm not threatening you, and I'm not threatening the program, I'm just stating a fact. I love you too much to be in an enclosed space with you for all those years, without going crazy. Your love for me could not have dissipated over one act of bad judgment, could it?" 

"I swear I should have hit you on the head harder. Most of the time, when you get your bell rung you're supposed to remember something. I'm not sure if you ever remember anything I tell you. I ask you not to piss me off, and you insist on pissing me off. I tell you to be careful, and you put your life in danger. What the hell am I supposed to do with you? What day is today?" 

"Saturday?" 

"It's Sunday you asshole. What is today's date?" 

Adam counted on his fingers. He looked to the heavens for help, and he looked at Laura contritely. 

"It's December 21." 

"Very good, and what are we supposed to do by 2 o'clock today?" 

"Go to church?" 

"Let's try this on for size instead. Bring the luggage to the spacecraft." 

"I remember that now. Can I take a quick shower and change first?" 

"How are you going to do that if you can't move your left arm?" 

"I can shower by myself, if you can help me dress." 

"Brush your teeth, I can smell you from here." 

Laura went to the front door, opened it, and called for George. 

He shouted, "One minute Laura, I'm asking for volunteers." 

George and four men walked up to her as she stood by the front door. 

"These men will take the luggage to the car. Then they will help Adam shave, and get him dressed. Do you want to take him to the hospital first, to have his arm x-rayed, or do you want to go to the NEST, check in, get your room assignment, and have us bring your luggage to your assigned room." 

"Why do I bother getting out of bed in the morning George, when you already know what I'm going to do for the rest of the day?" 

"Well miss, you have to check in personally at the spacecraft and sign documents so the government knows you are leaving of your own free will. Then there is the transfer of your money to Anna and the agents. You have to sign your marriage certificate, if you intend to complete the ceremony. I'll kick your ass if you don't. There's the insurance papers, canceling your policies, and a few hundred other papers that you have to sign and have notarized." 

"Why wasn't I told about this?" 

"Because they told me, and you didn't need to be bothered with it." 

"Do you remember the first time I fell off her horse?" 

"It wasn't a horse, it was a pony." 

"I told you I was never going to get back on that four-legged monster ever again. I never forgave you for what you did to me the next day, but as I thought about it, it was the funniest thing you ever did to me." 

"You went from sitting on a tiny pony one day, to sitting on a giant Clydesdale the next. You grew to love that horse because it was the gentlest animal you ever met. Do you know why it kept nibbling at your hair?" 

"It was the shampoo my mother put in it." 

"No, I put sugar on top of your head." 

"George, you are impossible." 

"It kept you riding, didn't it?" 

"Yes George, it's certainly did." 

A few moments later, they heard Adam scream. 

"I think they just put the shirt on over Adam's left arm. What did you do to the poor man last night?" 

"The Stevedore Handshake,' just like you taught me." 

"I asked you to be gentle, because you told him to stay out late." 

"I didn't mind that he stayed out late. I didn't mind that he got drunk. I was really pissed off because he drove home drunk, instead of calling for help." 

"I find that acceptable." 

The agents dragged Adam out the front door to where George and Laura were speaking. He was not happy. 

"Did you have something to say to me Adam?" 

Adam's fury dissipated instantly. "Does it look like I have anything to say to you dear?" 

"It looked like you had something on your mind, but it seems to have passed now. George, let's take Adam to the hospital, if he opens his mouth on the way there, I may break his right arm." 

"Be nice Laura, or you could be knee-deep in shit for a long time." 

Adam smiled, until Laura looked his way. 

"What are you smiling about Adam?" 

"I don't know, it must be gas." 

"Gas my ass." 

"That's the right place dear." 

George said, "The both of you will shut up, this minute, or you will wind up with ball gags in your mouths, until the evening of the 25th, when you will say I do, or get seriously injured." 

"We're still getting married Laura?" 

"I have been threatened with my life if we don't." 

"There's no one in this world that could threaten you." 

"There is one person in this world that can threaten me." 

"George, thank you George, I owe you my future." 

"No Adam, no one can guarantee your future. I guaranteed you are going to get married. The future is your concern. Don't piss her off. She reacts like I taught her to, and she destroys anything, or anyone that does it. You will keep Doctor Finch very busy if you keep this attitude of yours up. She will rip your balls off, and you will go from a he, to and it, before you scream." 

"Thank goodness no firearms are allowed on the spacecraft. She's probably an expert with those too." 

"Yes she is, and no you don't want to know her scores." 

"What did you do to this woman George? She is unlike any female I've ever known." 

"Laura told me her fears, and I made sure they went away. She had children's black belts by the time she was 7, and a full black belt by the time she was 12. When she entered high school, she was already developed, and a beautiful young woman. 

A senior, on the football team, made an aggressive pass at her. He was among other football players showing off. Laura almost killed him. A Vice Principal yelled for her to stop and she did, just in time. 

No male ever went near her again." 

**************** 

At the hospital, the x-rays showed his arm was not broken, only sprained. They wrapped it up, put it in a sling, gave him some pain medication, patted him on his ass, and sent him on his way. 

They returned to the SUV, and on the way to the NEST, Adam said, "I'm sorry, I really fucked up. I will try to make you proud of me again." 

"I should have broken your arm." 

"What more can I say, but I'm sorry?" 

"You are so dense Adam. It's going to take you 8 to 10 weeks for that arm to heal properly. If I broke it, it would have been out of the cast in 6 weeks." 

"If you two back there don't shut up, I'm going to use tape. Kiss and make up, you loved each other, and you are making me sick." 

"George this is none of your business." 

"Harry pull over to the side of the road. I have an ass to kick." 

"I'm not going to fight you George, you're too old." 

"I'm going to have you on your ass on the ground in less than a minute. While you're down, I'm going to hit you, until you beg for mercy. This garbage between you and Adam has got to stop. I know he made a mistake, but you are partially responsible for it. Now get out of the car so I can box your ears like I did when you were a child." 

"No. I love you too much George. I forgive you Adam, from the bottom of my heart I forgive you. I will never mention this again. When I marry you on Wednesday, it will be the happiest day of my life. Please try not to piss me off between now and then. I do love you, I have since you grabbed my hand in the theater. No other man ever had the courage to do that to me." 

Laura nearly killed him as the first few words exited Adam's mouth. She was happy she restrained herself. 

"I don't believe you could have forgiven me with more beautiful words. I give you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner. I promise to share your hopes and dreams. I promise to stand by you in good times and in bad for as long as we both shall live. I love you Laura Valentino. I have from the day we met, and I will for the rest of my life." 

George didn't have to look in the vanity mirror to know his charge was crying. He reached into his breast pocket, pulled out a handkerchief and put his hand over the back seat. The next thing he heard was, 

"God damn you George." 

He just stared straight ahead and smiled. 

******************* 

157. The Lineup 

There were eight double-wide desks located 50 feet before the bear traps. Eight tables for 64 individuals, or families. They were piled high with paper. Behind the tables were lawyers, insurance representatives, bankers and government functionaries from so many agencies it would take too long to mention to mention them all. 

Rod Laver was the notary public, plus the final authority to make sure each document was filled out properly, so no one, especially the United States Government could say any of these people were frauds, and were not going on this spacecraft into unknown parts of the universe. 

If the term 'Rank has its privileges' means anything to you, Jennifer and I went first, at table number one. Grayson, Delicious, Newton, and Teddy Thyme were at table number two. Gordon and Zoey Luck or at table number three. The other five members of the primary flight crew stood at the tables, waiting for me to begin. I nodded my head, and every female head of household began signing forms. It just seemed like the right thing to do. 

As each of us finished our paperwork, members of the secondary flight crews took our places. Each of us were given rooms on the third level. These rooms were not more spacious, or better equipped than any other room, they were just closer to our stations, if we were needed in case of an emergency. The few remaining rooms on the third floor were given to members of the engineering department, but the bulk of the engineering department, and almost everyone else, went to the fourth floor. 

Doctor Finch had two empty rooms next to his, which I didn't understand, even though I knew Sandy was pregnant. It would be a long time before they would be using the room next door for their child, but I still couldn't reconcile that extra empty room. The fourth floor also contained our security agents, except for one, Monty. 

Monty was put on the fifth floor next to the gym. I told her it was important for her to be there to break up any fights that may occur. Only a person with her stature could do it, without breaking someone's neck. 

She smiled. "What happens when Gordon is up there?" 

I told her there was a switch by the entrance to the gym that would cut off all communications. When she was finished with him, she could turn it on and tell us there was an accident and someone was hurt. 

She was ecstatic. 

The switch was actually for was the PA and television system throughout the ship. Everyone would hear and see what was going on in the gymnasium. We couldn't see baseball, tennis, or football, but these altercations would be the highlights of our time in space. 

We also had the scheduled battles between Gray and Gordon to look forward to. Once Gray was in shape, again, there battles could be epic. We were sure other members of the security force would also want to try their skills out, not only on Gordon, but on other members of their 10 team. Laura was also in the mix. It would be interesting to see how well Gordon would fair against her, and she would do against Monty. It appeared that our entertainment schedule was beginning to shape up nicely. 

The remainder of the fourth floor was filled with scientists, and our guests from all walks of life. 

Laura filled out her forms. Due to her wealth, and the transfers of money through her attorneys it took her nearly 35 minutes to do everything to everyone's satisfaction. When it got to Rod Laver it took another 20 minutes for him to go over everything and notarize each document. 

When Adam was asked his name, he replied, "Adam, no middle initial, Schiff. Can I have a room with a window please?" He took two quick steps, one back, and one to his right. He was behind Laura before the punch that would have knocked him to the ground passed the spot where he was standing. 

"I ought to kill you for that remark." 

"Can't you tell when I am joking, and when I'm not? You are going to have to develop a sense of humor, or I am going to be the first death on that sphere." He held her arms down by her side, kissed her neck, and nibbled on her earlobe. 

"I told you I wanted to live with you until I died. I don't want you to be the one that kills me." 

She was hit so hard on the back of her head she had to take a step forward. She turned, and looked at Adam as if he was about to turn into a cooked roast beef. 

George said, "You have three days, and if you don't start listening to the man, when you walk the plank to get into the spacecraft, you are going to need help." 

"You hit me." 

"I gave you a love tap. When I hit you, you will know it." 

She turned to Adam and asked, "Are you going to protect me from him?" 

"Are you crazy? I can't beat you, how am I supposed to beat him?" 

"Pussy." 

"I don't care if I'm the line of pussies, I'd rather be alive than dead." 

"You are very smart man Adam. If you let her control your life, she will crush you to death. Stand up for yourself, I don't care if you have to sleep in a chair every night every night. She will be in the wrong, and when she realizes it, she will come to you and apologize." 

"I don't like you George." 

"Would you like to start here, and now, in front of all these people, Laura? I'm willing. Either you get off your high horse, and start living like a human being, or go back to your mother and live in Glens Fall for the rest of your life. You are becoming like your mother. Remember how you ran away from her? Remember how sick you thought she was? You and Robert ran away leaving Anna to take care of her. Who is going to take care of you now? If you keep acting like this Adam is not going to put up with it. Adam has to go on this trip because of his qualifications. They don't need a mentally ill person on this trip. The computer can do your job." 

"George, you're fired." 

"Thank you ma'am, I don't want to watch the woman I love allow herself to become so mentally ill that all the money in the world will not be able to keep her out of a mental institution." 

As George walked away, the agents surrounding her said as one, "Miss Valentino, we quit." 

She replied, "You can't, you're under contract." 

Victor said, "You are leaving in three days, two of which are holidays; sue us." 

Laura started crying so hard she couldn't see. Adam didn't approach her. She fucked up, and she had to find a way to fix. 

Laura turned towards him, and asked, "Please help me. Get George back here so I can apologize to him. I can't lose him, he is part of my heart, and part of my soul. Run after him and get him back for me Adam, please." 

"Baby, you are the runner. I can't run 150 feet without stopping for air. If you want George back, it's up to you to get him." 

"You're lying to me, I've seen you run before." 

"It was probably for a beer, and the longer you argue with me, the further George is getting away from you. Make a decision Laura, your life is falling apart in front of you." 

"You are a real bastard." 

"If that's what you think of me, don't marry me." He started walking away from her also. 

Laura cried out, "Adam!" 

Adam didn't turn, he just kept walking straight ahead. 

Stephano saw his daughter standing alone, crying her heart out. He ran over to her, and crushed her body to his. 

"What's going on baby, what did you do?" 

"I threw my life away dad. I got angry and I fired George." 

"After 21 years, you fired George? Are you out of your mind?" 

"That's exactly what Adam said, before I called him a bastard. He said if that's the way I felt about him not to marry him. He walked away." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 33



"You lost Adam too? You're having a banner day aren't you?" 

"George said I was acting like mom before she went to see Doctor Null." 

"Are you suffering from the same malady your mother was?" 

"What do you mean, 'Separation Anxiety?' I'm not sure, I don't know dad. This is my life's dream." 

"So far to satisfy your dream, you fired your best friend, you lost your entire security force, and your future husband. I'm beginning to wonder if your dream is worth it." 

"So am I daddy. Are any of our aircraft here, I want to go home." 

"Yes, we have three aircraft in Houston, and four in Austin. How are you going to get there?" 

"I'll drive." 

"I'll have them pull your paperwork, I want them to know you're still alive if you decide not to go." 

"Thanks dad. When you're finished here, do me a favor. Take mom on a long vacation. I'd like to be alone." 

"I'll take her around the world, it should take at least four months to do. I'll notify you before we come home. You can either stay or disappear, it's your choice." 

"I love you dad. Tell mom I love her too." 

"What airport are you going to? I will have a flight crew ready." 

"I will go to Houston, it's closer to home." 

"Enjoy your life baby, make the most of it." 

"I will." They kissed and she walked away. 

Stephano said to his breast pocket, "She's going to Houston." 

"Yes Mister Valentino, we heard. We have her covered." 

"Thank you George, there will be a plane waiting for you too. You will be able to hear everything she says." 

"Thank you sir, will I be able to talk to her, like I am her conscience?" 

"You're sneaky George, but I will make sure you have two way communications." 

******************** 

Stephano said into his communicator, "Find Adam Schiff and do not allow him to leave the property." 

"What's going on Stephano? I didn't think you know how to use these communicators." 

"Even we have a problem. Laura is on her way home. I don't know if we lost our plumber or not. I'm trying to find out." 

"I will meet you at the front left side of the hanger." 

"What's a hangar?" 

"After I find out if I have a plumber or not, I'll tell you your joke stunk, and how hi." 

"Mister Valentino, we have Mister Schiff. Where do you want us to bring him?" 

"Bring him to the front left side of the hanger please." 

**************** 

"Hello Even, our guest of honor will be here in a minute." 

"Can I get a one minute breakdown of what happened?" 

"I can make it shorter than that. Laura turned into Patti." 

"No shit!" 

"Nooo shiiittt!" 

"When did this happen?" 

"Sometime between last night at midnight and this afternoon. When I left her last night, except for Adam lying on the entryway floor, she was fine. Something happened today that set her off. She fired her lead agent, and her best friend of 21 years, George Akins. The rest of her agents quit on the spot once she did it. Then she called Adam a bastard. He told her if that's what you think of me don't marry me. He walked off. Now she's running home, just like Patti would. She's going to hide behind those fences, until I tell her that her mother and I are coming home. Then she'll run someplace else where she can be alone. It's just like the last time with Patti. 

Even, they are 25 years apart, and they are twins. I had no idea what to do with Patti, and I have no idea what to do with my daughter." 

"Here comes Adam, maybe he can give us some answer Steph." 

"Hello Mister Valentino, Mister Luck, it's turned out to be a real shitty day." 

"That's what we need to talk to you about Adam. Can you tell us why Laura broke down today?" 

"It wasn't me. I swear it wasn't me." 

"Adam, nobody's accusing you of anything. We are just trying to find out what happened to make her crack. She fired George after 21 years. Something must've happened to make her do it. What was going on, were they fighting?" 

"Yes they were. At one point, George told our driver to pull over to the side of the road so he could box her ears. He told her she was acting like a child." 

"Where the two of you arguing when George intervened?" 

"I guess you could say that, but it was more like Laura reading me the riot act, and I finally put my foot down at one point. George told Laura she had better listen to me or Wednesday she would need help walking up the plank to get into the spacecraft. More words were interchanged, and then George hit her in the back of the head so hard she took a step forward. Initially she thought it was me, but then she looked at George and said, "You hit me." 

"I gave you a love tap," George said, "When I hit you, you'll know it." 

Laura told him she didn't like him, and George really laid into her. He told her how she abandoned her mother when her mother needed her, and how she treated her mother when her mother was sick. He hoped now that when she was getting sick people left her alone so she got so sick that even her money would not be enough to get her out of a mental institution. That's when Laura said, "George you're fired." Everything went downhill from there." 

I said to Adam, "I have to ask you a very selfish question, and I know this is a very hard time for you to answer it. Are you coming with us on Wednesday? You are the only plumber we have. We don't even have an apprentice. Without you we are "Up shits creek without a paddle." We have a lot of smart people on board, and I'm sure some of us can learn how to do it. You had years of experience, and they had to put you through months of accelerated training to bring you up to a passing level. I need an answer now: yes or no." 

"I'm going with you Doctor Luck. There's nothing left for me here, and there is no hope of me getting Laura back. Mister Valentino has been through this before, and George has lived through it vicariously with Mrs. Valentino. I don't want to be around and watch Laura go insane. If she does get well one day Mister Valentino tell her... tell her I will always love her." 

"I will Adam, I'll make sure she knows." 

"Adam do I remember correctly that your father is an air traffic control supervisor?" 

"Yes Mister Valentino he is. Why, what are you thinking?" 

"I'm thinking of cooping my daughter up in an airplane for three hours or more and letting her listen to her conscience, are you there George?" 

"Yes sir, I'm right here, and you say I'm sneaky." 

"Adam can you get your father on a private line?" 

"That's not a problem Mister Valentino." 

****************** 

"He's on the phone Mister Valentino, my father's name is Barry." 

"Mister Schiff, my name is Stephano Valentino, my daughter is quite taken with your son as you probably know, and right now there in the middle of the tiff. With three days to the wedding she's trying to escape home to think. I'd rather keep her closer. I need a favor from you if you can do it." 

"What do you have in mind Stephano?" 

"Two of my airplanes 51 Victor India and 85 Victor India are at the general aviation terminal at Houston. Do you have any influence there?" 

"We have been known to help each other out every now and again Stephano. What do you want us to do?" 

"I want you to put those two airplanes as far out in left field as you can, and forget about them for like three hours or so. You can call it a test for your paperwork. My pilots will tell the passenger that it is a severe weather air-traffic control hold, and they will be off as soon as possible." 

"That's easy enough, why don't you send something nice up to the tower as a thank you." 

"How many people work up there?" 

"There are roughly 30 up there." 

"How about at your place?" 

"216." 

"You are rather sure of that last number." 

"I better be, that's my job." 

"Thank you Barry, I'll call you when to release those airplanes." 

"I'll be waiting." 

"George are you there?" 

"Yes Mister Valentino I am here." 

"You get into 85, let Laura get into 51; that's the older aircraft. I'll have yours serviced completely with a full buffet, and hers with a partial and make it look like it's a left over, and no ice. 

When she finds out this was a set-up, I'm hoping she's in outer space and not with me. She will tear me from limb to limb if she still on the ground. I better let her mother in on this, or I'll catch hell from both ends." 

******************** 

"Hello dear how was your day?" 

"What's wrong, what did you do?" 

"I haven't done anything, I called and asked how your day was." 

"That's the problem. It's Sunday, it's the middle of the afternoon, and you are calling to find out how my day was. What's wrong?" 

"The next time I call you remind me to have a gun pointing down towards my foot so I can shoot myself." 

"Come home, I have a gun, I'll pointed at your foot, and I'll shoot you, right after you tell me What's wrong!" 

"What could possibly be wrong? Laura fired George. The remainder of her agents quit. She called Adam a bastard and he walked off telling her not to marry him. Laura is now on her way to Houston to catch a flight to Glen Falls. She sounds more like her mother to me than she does like herself. I guess that's about it." 

"How long ago did this happen?" 

"It happened within the last hour." 

"What have you done to try to cauterize these wounds?" 

"George and his team are in a girls club getting sloshed. Adams in the woods getting laid. Laura is looking like her mother more and more each minute." 

"I heard it the first time Stephano, I'll talk to her. Who is covering Laura?" 

"George and his team are covering Laura." 

"Where is Adam?" 

"He's with Even sulking." 

"Tell Even to get him drunk." 

"I don't think that would be a good idea." 

"Tell Even to get him drunk." 

"Patti it would not be a good idea." 

"Why not?" 

"He came home drunk last night and she nearly ripped off his left arm." 

"How do you know that?" 

"I was there when she did it. Adam is wearing a sling today, because she went easy on him." 

"I bet that must have hurt." 

"It hurt me and I was only watching." 

"What evil plan is happening now?" 

"Two of our aircraft are going to be sitting at the far ends of Houston airport on an indefinite hold. Our dear Laura will be in one, with a limited food tray and no ice, while George will be sitting in the other with a full buffet speaking to her as her conscience. 

Of course if you wish to call her on her cell phone, you may do so. If it's turned off, she's in aircraft 51. You can get her through our control center. She can run but she can't hide. Oh she wants us to go on an around the world trip so she can be at home alone for four months." 

"Like hell, let her go around the world, I want my bed." 

"Okay, you tell her, while you're speaking to her. She should just be getting to the airport about now. Give her another two hours until she's locked in, and frustrated, then give her a call." 

"Okay sweetheart, when are you coming home?" 

"I'll be leaving here as soon as I check in with Even." 

"Okay, I'll see you soon." 

Stephano walked over to Rod Laver, who was buried under paperwork. 

"Rod I need a favor." 

"Sure Stephano, what do you need?" 

"I need you to pull Laura's paperwork out of there. I don't know if she's going or not. She had a huge fight with Adam and George, and she's running home to Glens Falls. She can easily make it there spend two days, and be back for Sunday afternoon's launch, but I don't know. I think the safest way to play it is to pull the paperwork and just keep it on the side. Tuesday and Wednesday are holidays and no work will be done. If she goes the paperwork goes back in. If she doesn't the paperwork is already removed, and no one has to rush around looking for it." 

Rod looked at the stack of paper, and then at Stephano. "It looks like my Wheaties are going to come in handy today. I'll take care of it Steph, all this needs to be filed alphabetically anyhow." 

"I feel for you Rod, I really do. Take care." 

******************* 

George and his team were cleared through the security gate, straight to aircraft 85VI. As soon as they were seated, the copilot was on the radio. 

Houston Ground Control, this is November 4285Victor India, request clearance to the 'Penalty Box.' Penalty time unknown." 

"4285Victor India is cleared to the penalty box. I have no idea what you guys are up to, but have a good time." 

"Thank you Ground Control, 51 Victor India will be there to hold our hand shortly. We are trying to mend a lover's quarrel." 

"85, please tell me you're joking with me." 

"With the amount of money the Valentino's have, I wouldn't dare joke with you." 

"One word of advice 85, Park with the nose of the aircraft away from the sun, otherwise it's going to get awful hot in there." 

"You are a wonderful person Ground Control. You can expect some gifts coming your way shortly." 

The pilot of the aircraft 85 turned on company frequency to see if aircraft 51 was on the net. 

"51 this is 85 over." 

"85 this is 51 go ahead." 

"51 the tower just gave me a wonderful idea. Point the nose of the aircraft away from the sun. It will keep you cool, and the passenger compartment hot. You can tell Miss Valentino that you're running the air conditioner at full power, while the aircraft is being baked, by the sun. If she tells you to return to the terminal, tell her you'll lose your place in line for a take-off to the northeast. It looks like a two hour delay now, and if you lose your place in line, you may not be able to take off until midnight, or early the next morning." 

"Are you sure this is cleared by Mister Valentino? I don't want to lose my job." 

"I don't want to lose my job either. I got my orders directly from George, Laura's primary. If he says this is what were supposed to do, we are going to do it." 

"Okay Artie, I'm on board. I hope she doesn't have a cell phone on her where she can get the weather for the Northeast. It couldn't be nicer up there if it tried." 

"You can always tell her the problem is over the Shenandoah Valley, moving northeast, and the FAA is closing down the airports just to be safe. If she doesn't believe you tell her to call her father." 

"I love you Artie, you always know how to pass the buck." 

"I'll take that as a compliment Lewis, although I do feel a blade close to my spine. I've just reached the penalty box, and I'm pointing the nose of the aircraft southeast. I'll see you soon." 

*************** 

"I'm sorry Miss, I can't let you through security. You do not have any identification on you." 

"I left my purse with my father. Don't tell me I can't get on my own aircraft." 

"Miss if you continue to make a scene I'm going to have to have you arrested." 

"Can someone vouch for me? Can the pilot of the aircraft identify who I am? I own the fucking thing. I only paid $48 million for it, I should be allowed to fly in it." 

"Are the ownership papers in the aircraft?" 

"They damn well better be." 

"Call your pilot, and have him bring them to the security desk. Until he gets here I would advise you to keep quiet." 

Laura was about to tell this TSA flunky exactly where to go, but decided to hold her tongue. She was pissed off enough already, she did not want to go to jail because of it. She called the control center and had them patch her through to the pilot of aircraft 51. 

"Mister DeMarre, this is Laura Valentino. They are holding me in the security area because I don't have any identification on me. Would you please bring the ownership papers from the aircraft to me so I can shove it down the guys throat please?" 

"Miss Valentino, I have more experience with these $12 an hour TSA employees than you do. I would suggest you put a smile on your face, when you show them these papers, because he still could keep you off this aircraft. Your picture is not on the ownership papers, and it is required under the law for you to have a picture ID to board a civil aircraft. So be nice to him until you're on the aircraft. Then call him and tell him to go fuck himself." 

"I will heed your advice Mister DeMarre, I want to get home." 

10 minutes later, Captain DeMarre greeted Laura and went to the front of the line to show the paperwork for the aircraft to the agent. Laura's signature was all over it, and the guard asked her to sign several pieces of paper to prove it was her signature. 

Laura had flames coming out of her ears again, but she smiled, as the captain directed her to do, and the signatures matched perfectly. 

"You may board your aircraft Miss Valentino, but this is a one-time exemption. The next time you had better have a picture ID, or I will send you back to get one." 

"Yes sir, I appreciate your kindness." 

The Captain pulled her by the arm out onto the tarmac as fast as he could, and Laura started to scream epithets at that agent he had not heard from a woman's mouth ever. He decided at that moment to lock the cockpit doors as soon as he started the engines. He valued his life more than he valued his job. 

Laura was not listening to the first part of the conversation between the pilot and the control tower, but as they were taxing towards the runway she heard the pilot say, "FUCK!" 

The aircraft continued taxiing normally until they reached the end of the runway, crossed it, and went to an area where another aircraft was parked, and waiting for takeoff instructions. 

"Miss Valentino, I have some bad news for you. The FAA has put us on an indefinite ground hold due to bad weather approaching the Northeast. We are waiting to find out what number we are for takeoff clearance. If we had stayed at the gate for three more minutes, you could have sat comfortably in the executive lounge area. Now you have to spend that time here in the aircraft the entire hold time. I am very sorry." 

"It was not your fault Captain. I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible, and I did. Neither you nor I anticipated this. How long before we know what number we are in line?" 

"It should take the computer, in Virginia, a few minutes to give us our slot Miss Valentino. I'm going to shut down one engine to conserve fuel, but I will be running the air-conditioning at full power to keep the aircraft as cool as possible. It is very hot outside, as you know." 

"Thank you Captain, it's very considerate of you." 

Lewis set the cabin temperature at 79°, which was guaranteed to make Laura hotter than she already was, and sleepier. It would be the perfect atmosphere for George to mentally berate her. It was time for Laura to grow up, and learn to compromise. He taught her how to be strong, but now she was too strong, to the point she was overbearing. 

Patti was the same way. It took an equally strong man to tame her, and to love her unconditionally. Stephano's fights with Patti were thermonuclear, and their make-up sessions took weeks, but they survived everything and married on the one term she would not compromise on. She had to be a virgin when she went to her marital bed. 

25 years later, Laura was running away days before her wedding. Like her mother and father, she and Adam had played at the sexual games, but had not had intercourse. She was a virgin, like her mother, and three days from now she would go to her marital bed pure. That is if she married Adam, and at this moment, it was not looking good." 

"Miss Valentino, our slot number is 486." 

Laura screamed. "There are 486 aircraft ahead of us?" 

"Yes ma'am, that's not many aircraft at all. It's about 2 hours, probably less. They will see we are not going to land at any major airport, and slide us around about 200 miles west of New York. Depending on how bad the weather is over Pennsylvania, it could be less than an hour's hold, because we are going to Albany, which is never busy." 




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



All persons in this novel are fictitious. If you are looking for a great deal of sexual activity, this story is not for you. Those scenes that are included will be evocative, rather than just for the sake of sex itself.

This story is for your reading pleasure. Its length is undetermined at this time, because I do not know where my mind will take me as I proceed along this journey. I hope you will stay with this story until it reaches its inevitable...

This story is copyrighted material owned by Prolonged_Debut10. I am over the age of 18, and all my other information is on file with Literotica.com





There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



Signed: Even/Jennifer Luck, Stephano/Patricia Valentino, Christian/Callalily Chase, Philip/Celeste Castronova, Dycke/ Payne Schneider, William T. Moses, August/Mildred Ellery... 

Tears were running down his face as he read the salutation, and the names signed on the bottom of the plaque. He received many of these tokens during his business career, but none of them meant more to him than this one did.

Jemma handed him a handkerchief. She asked him if he understood why I sent this plaque to him privately, instead of handing it to him publicly at the festivities today.

"I do, because if I would have broken down and cried on the stage today, I would have hunted him down to the ends of the universe and killed him."

"Give me that damn plaque back. I always wanted to go for a trip around the stars, and don't you dare say another word."

"Who me?"

"Yes you, you nasty minded bastard."

"Call that sonofabitch for me please, and hand me the phone."

"The telephone is 3 feet away from you, just as it is for me. Why don't you get up and get it?"

"I've always had you to do it for me."

"What's Lucius's phone number? I may take him up on one of his many offers."

"No you wouldn't. You would have to divorce me first, and lose all that money."

"I never married you for your money, and you know it. I never said anything about a divorce either. Lucius and I will live in sin forever."

"Lucius would not do that to me."

"You're probably right, but shall we test your theory? Or do you want to get your lazy ass off the couch, move 3 feet, and pick up the telephone?"

"I love when you get feisty."

"You love it even more when I get feisty in bed."

*************

"You are damn lucky you didn't give this to me on stage today Even."

"What did I do now William? I tried to escape from my house earlier this morning, only to have it foiled by an extraordinary wife. I'm not allowed to leave here until 10 AM, and I've bitten my fingernails up to my elbows already. What else could I possibly have done today that could have raised the specter of your ire?"

"You sent me a package, with a blue uniform, and a plaque."

"I am going to kill you Jennifer. I was supposed to give him those things on stage today."

"Trying to pass this off on your lovely wife will not extend your life any longer than this afternoon my friend. You are lucky you sent this to my home, otherwise you would've met your sister much earlier than you thought possible."

"I would never do anything to embarrass you William. You are too important to me, to this, and our upcoming projects to make you wish you had kicked my ass before I left."

"I will not buy the State of South Carolina for you, no matter how nice you are to me."

"We already have the land in South Carolina. If you feel like purchasing the land around our land, I would not be opposed to that."

"You are an evil sonofabitch, even on the most important day of your life."

"I told Jennifer last night today is not my day. It's our day. The financiers, the scientists, the engineers, the electricians, and the technicians that put the Good Luck 1 together. Everyone is rooting for her to go to the stars, except those companies who are milking the government trough dry on old technologies. They are the only ones who win, if we fail today. I am wondering, deep in my heart, if they don't have one more dirty trick up their sleeves, to try to kill our project today."

"What has you worried Even?"

"Can you get me the position of the US Home fleet, and if any guided missile cruisers are missing from it?"

"They would never be that bold."

"They've done it once already. Why not give it a second try, after all it is Christmas."

"Merry Christmas Even, you will have everything you need to know within the hour."

"I'm going to miss you William."

"I'm going to miss you too Even, I expect a phone call when you pass Pluto."

"Can I call collect, after all, we did come in $47 billion under budget."

"Hang up you sonofabitch, before I come over there and beat the hell out of you."

"You don't have to yell."

**************

(Singing) "We're getting married this afternoon. Ding dong the bells are going to ring. Don't lose your compass, I made a promise, just get it to the spacecraft on time."

"So help me God, Adam, if you sing that song one more time, I'm going to have to learn how to be a plumber for that spacecraft in a very short period of time. You are going to be dead for two excellent reasons. Those are not the words to the song, and you can't sing worth a shit. If I put you on the talent show, you would not get one vote, especially not from me."

"You're just jealous of my country vocals."

"A cat in heat sings better than you do."

"Are we having our last fight as single people?"

"What did I ask you not to do?"

"You asked me not to put colored clothes in with the white clothes."

"Do you want to walk to our wedding Adam, or do you want to crawl?"

"Walking sounds good."

"Your left arm is still in a sling, would you like your right arm to join it?"

"No, it would make tomorrow morning almost impossible for you, and for me."

"You could dream about it for a very long time."

"I have been dreaming about it for a very long time. I've kept most of my promises, and broken several more. I piss you off on a continuing basis, mostly because you have no sense of humor. Either that, or you don't like my sense of humor. You promised you would try to change. I am going to try to meet you halfway. How far is halfway going to be for us Laura? I love you with all my heart. How do you feel about me?"

"If I didn't love you, more than any man on this planet, I would have been gone a long time ago."

"How about women?"

"You're a dead man Adam, you will never live to see the spacecraft again."

"Do you see what I mean Laura; you have no sense of humor at all."

Laura picked up her cell phone and called George.

 "George get your ass in here, before I kill him."

George burst through the front door, and stood between them. He looked at Laura and asked, "What the fuck did you do wrong this time?"

"It wasn't me it was him. He told me how much he loved me, and then he asked me how I felt about him. I told him, if I didn't love him more than any other man on this planet, I would have been gone a long time ago. Do you know what his answer was? Tell him Adam, tell him before I kill you."

"I asked her how she felt about women."

George started laughing uncontrollably, and Laura became incensed.

"How can you possibly take his side?"

"Listen to me your high and mightiness. First you never told him how much you loved him. All you did was compare him to every other man on the planet. Is it so hard for you to say those three little words, I love you?

Then after you make this long incongruous statement about other men, he had every right to ask you the question, 'What about women?' It was a joke, and it was very funny. If you didn't see it that way, you are in big trouble. If you can't say those three little words to Adam, why the fuck are you marrying him? Call it off so I can beat the shit out of you before you leave. They have extra rooms on board the spacecraft; you can live in one, and Adam another. He's not a fucking pony, he's a Clydesdale. He deserves your respect and love. If you're unable to give him what he honestly deserves, break off this relationship now, before children are involved. Don't bother, I know, I'm fired. This was my last day anyhow."

"Am I really that backward in the ways of the world George?"

"After you graduated high school, how many times a week did you leave the ranch? Let me change that, how many times a month did you leave the ranch?"

"Once, maybe twice a month at the most. Everything was delivered to us, and there was never a need for us to go anywhere. I had the best computer in the world in the house, and that's where I spent my time."

"How many friends did you invite over to the house to have fun with?"

"I never had anyone over. I was either working on the computer, swimming, working-out with you, or fighting with my mother. My days were full."

"Shall we go back to your original question now? Am I really that backward in the ways of the world? Would you like to answer the question for yourself, or would you like me to do it for you?"

"The only people I had in my life were Robert and Anna. When they went to college I had no one. That was one of the reasons I wanted to come out here to work with Doctor Luck on the stasis project. Once mom agreed to join me, I knew we were staying at the ranch, because she would never leave it. I'm amazed, and happy she's come this far."

"So what you are saying to me is that your mother has come further than you have."

"It sure looks that way, doesn't it?"

"Your mother asked you three questions when you were locked up on the aircraft. Do you remember the questions, and your answers? If you don't, I can play them for you."

"I'd like to hear them if you don't mind George."

"It would be totally up to Laura, because it was a private conversation with her mother."

"Go ahead George, play it for him."

"Okay, here goes."

Patti asked Laura, "Adam, do you love him enough to marry him?"

"Mom he is a pain in the ass."

"So is your father, and I've been married to him for 25 years. Now answer the question, do you love him and do you want to marry him?"

"I love him with all my heart mom. He just keeps pissing me off."

"Your father and I have a room for that."

"Yes I know mom."

"So there is no problem with Adam?"

"No mom, there is no problem with Adam."

"Do you still want to find out if our stasis devices work? 63 people are betting their lives on what we did. Junie survived one year. Do you think they will work for 10 years or more?"

"That's why I want to go with them. I want to stand..."

"Are you afraid of going into space?"

"No I'm not. For some reason or another I know I belong out there and so do my children..."

"George, I believe I've heard enough. Now everything falls to you Laura. Did you mean what you said to your mother, or were you just telling her what she wanted to hear?"

"I love you Adam, with every fiber of my being. You are going to have to teach me an awful lot while we are together. Don't give up on me, I am usually a very fast learner."

Adam moved in for a kiss, but George beat him to it.

"Now that's the girl I helped raise. When you open your mind to new possibilities you are very fast learner. You will make many mistakes on the way, but don't give up on yourself either. You will be living in a very close knit community. You've never done that before. Everyone will help you along the way, especially the babies. Not only yours, but everyone else's too."

"You're going to make me cry George. You know that's not allowed."

"You could fire me again if you wish."

"Okay, once the spacecraft leaves the ground, both you and our team are fired. On January 3, all of you are to be at my attorney's office at 9 AM, in a suit and tie, for my bequests to all of you. If you are not in a suit and tie, a SWAT team will accompany you to Justice Brothers to have you fitted for a suit. You will wait for it to be completed. It could take all day, it could take two days. You will not leave the store without that suit on your back. Basically George, you will be under house arrest if you're not wearing a suit."

"You're doing this just to piss me off aren't you?"

"When was the last time you wore a suit George?"

"I believe it was your high school graduation."

"I hope it still fits, otherwise you'd better get one this week."

"Why don't we step outside for a little while, I feel like kicking your ass."

"You were 29 years old when you began to care of me George. That makes you 50 years old now. I don't think you could take me."

"There is only one way to find out Ms. Valentino?"

"Yes there is."

"Laura stay where you are, and apologize to him."

"What did you say to me?"

"I told you to stay where you are, and apologize to George for your remarks. He helped raise you. He helped make you what you are, and to show your appreciation for what he did for you, you want to go outside and try to break his neck. I won't allow it. It's not going to happen today or any other day. Act your age, and put your hormones away."

George had a big shit eating grin on his face. Laura's jaw was open so far, it nearly hit the floor. Adam had taken a stand on an issue, and now she had to make a decision. Should she openly defy him, or back down and apologize to her mentor.

After gazing at him for a long while, she relented.

"Yes dear. George, I apologize for my actions and my words. You have been my best friend and teacher for 21 years. I should know better than to take my anger out on you. Please forgive me, and try to forget what I said."

"I'm sorry Laura, were you talking to me? I am getting old, and my hearing aid batteries must need replacing. I didn't hear a word you said."

Laura was livid. She started pounding George on his chest with both hands. All he could do was laugh. She reacted like a girl, instead of a trained fighter. He finally controlled her arms, and kissed her again.

"Didn't I teach you anything at all over these last 20 years?"

"Yes, but Adam told me I was not allowed to hurt you, so I didn't."

Adam was holding onto the wall, laughing, trying not to fall to the floor.

"Why are you laughing at me Adam?"

"You looked like a girl, while you were hitting George, after he goaded you."

"He was joking with me?"

"I don't wear hearing aids Laura."

"Can we get changed, and leave for the NEST now Adam. If anyone else plays a joke on me today, I will not be responsible for my reaction."

Adam pulled her into his arms and kissed her. He whispered into her ear, "Yes you will!"

Laura screamed, and stamped her foot. 

Adam raced to their bedroom, and jumped on their bed. 

She followed him, with blood in her eyes.

George went outside knowing his job was done.

Laura glared at Adam as he was resting comfortably. He said, "You have two choices, if you lock that door. Its 9:30 AM, we can dress and be at the NEST in 40 minutes. Or we can undress, and I can do your front, and back. If we have any time remaining, I can do your legs and your toes. We don't have to be there until 1 o'clock. Which would you prefer my dear?"

Her eyes softened. "Do you remember when you were having trouble remembering the bottom was the top, and the top was the bottom?"

"Yes, it was on the examination, and I received 100% on that area of the test."

"I believe they made an error in scoring on that particular area of the exam. You are going to be retested...NOW."

"Miss, that portion of the examination takes an extremely long time. Also, we would need to take a shower afterwards, because the work is extremely hands on. The clean-up time could be of an equally long duration. Does this meet with your approval?"

"Sir, I believe you're stalling."

"Miss, you are still fully dressed. The Exam cannot begin with you in that condition."

"I apologize, you are correct. I noticed you were wounded. Given the option, would you like to assist me in disrobing?"

"It would be my honor."

The blouse was easy, but the front closing bra was tricky.

He said, "Fuck this. Using his right arm he lifted the strap holding the sling in place and threw it aside. Moving his left arm slowly and painfully, he used both hands to undo a bra and removed it from Laura's body. While kissing her passionately, his hands were rubbing her breasts. He tweaked her nipples, as he bent down to untie her sneakers, and removed them along with her tiny socks. He shuffled their bodies around, to make sure her body was in contact with the bed. He hooked his fingers inside the waistband of her slacks, and panties. Using his head as a battering ram, he pushed, and made her fall onto the bed. As she was falling, her slacks and panties moved down to her knees.

Laura picked her head up to look at him. "Smooth move Adam, was that on the exam also?"

"No baby, it was something I learned when I was a junior in high school. If the girl was already naked, there was very little she could say about having sex."

"Did you learn that in biology or an engineering class?"

"It was chemistry actually. If you had chemistry with a girl, sex was next on the list. I always used protection, and never disrespected a girl. I never got a girl pregnant, and if she said stop or no, I stopped."

"You had an excellent chemistry teacher. Who was it?"

"Don't laugh, because it's true. It was my mother. My father still is a religious fanatic. Sex is only supposed to be used for procreation. He didn't tell my mother about his views until after they were married, and she was pregnant with me. Once I was born, he didn't want any more children, and sex stopped. My mom got a divorce. The judge nearly laughed him out of the witness chair, when he explained his position. My mother let me read the minutes of the trial, and the judge's disposition of the case. It was hysterical. She received support from him, until I was 18 years old. She had a series of lovers, but never got married just to get even with him. She taught me who, how, when, where, and what about seduction, and sex, using some very explicit texts that came in brown packages. She was an excellent teacher, and I was an excellent student."

"Mother knows best."

"If you give me an hour, I'll prove it to you."

"You have my permission to begin."

He picked up her left foot, separated the little toe, and inserted it into his mouth. His hands worked on the muscles and bones on the bottom of her foot. She quickly felt fluids beginning to build up inside her vagina. It made no sense to her, but she wasn't about to complain. How that toe was connected to her sexual organs was a mystery to her, but as her body temperature continued to rise, and the fluids inside her vagina began dribbling onto her thighs, she was not about to argue with the results.

When he put the next digit into his mouth, his thumbs began massaging the heel of her foot. An electric shock went from the tip of her tiny toe, to her ovaries. She winced in pre-orgasmic pain, raised her hips off the bed, and collapsed down. She moaned, with her eyes closed. When she opened them, she looked at Adam, and he winked at her. She reminded herself that this was just the start of his foreplay, and hoped tomorrow morning would be the fulfillment of both their dreams. She hoped Adam was as good a teacher as his mother was, because he certainly was a retentive student.

*****************

160. The 2nd Fleet

"You are a god damn evil man Even Luck."

"Why, what did I do this time?"

"Would you like to take a guess where the United States 2nd Fleet is?"

"In the water?"

"Even don't make me hit you."

"Okay, so far this morning I've been threatened to be hit by my wife, my daughter, and now you William. My day is not looking good."

"Why did you ask me to find out the whereabouts of the 2nd Fleet?"

"Oh, is that what we are talking about? I asked you about its position, because I didn't want them to shoot at us, as we pass overhead their position."

"Would you like to take a guess where the US 2nd Fleet is?"

"They are someplace under our 138° climb out direction after takeoff."

"Give that man a prize. The United States 2nd Fleet is 1500 miles northwest of Freetown, Sierra Leone. They are doing flight operations, and live fire exercises, using all new, state of the art anti-submarine, anti-surface, and anti-aircraft missile systems. My friend at the Pentagon said one of the new antiaircraft missiles is capable of reaching altitudes of 140,000 feet. It is designed to take out the new threat capabilities of non-orbital vehicles, such as our Global Hawk."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



"Give me a moment William."

"Holden, Gordon, get in here."

I heard them before I saw them.

"Where do you think you're going little man?"

"Let go of my neck, and fix your pants. You look ridiculous."

Holden burst into the lead and reached me first. Gordon finished fixing his belt as he came to a stop by my right shoulder."

"Enjoying your downtime son?"

"I was, until someone bellowed by name."

"Wonderful, both of you put your thinking caps on. What will our altitude and airspeed be when we cross 111.48° West by 53.23° North."

Holden asked, "Can I use your laptop so I can see a grid map."

Gordon didn't ask anything so casual. He wanted to know what was at that geographical intersection.

I answered just as casually, "Nothing important, just the US 2nd Fleet."

"Are they there to do a search and destroy, or a search and rescue mission?"

"You answer my question, and I'll answer yours."

"They haven't got a prayer dad," Holden said. "Once we finish our systems check, at 500 feet, and Delicious increases power to the magnetic grid to 95%, Gordon is going to increase power to the fusion engine to 48%. We will be moving faster than 16,000 mph, and passing 150,000 feet 40 seconds later. We will have barely entered the Gulf of Mexico, and the 2nd Fleet is in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. Whoever did their math did a profile of the space shuttle leaving out of Cape Kennedy, believing that was the best anyone could ever do."

"The people at the air traffic control centers had to show them the tapes of us maneuvering at 4000 mph around the country."

"Sometimes people don't want to believe what they see, and other times they see what they don't want to believe. This leaves us with a more obvious problem. Someone's going to try to plant the bomb on the spacecraft today."

There was a hard knock at the front door, and Jennifer yelled, "Don't touch it, or the alarm will go off. Even put your birthday numbers into the alarm module to turn it off. Month, followed by the day and year."

"Okay, I've got it."

As soon as I turned my back, and started walking down the hall towards the alarm, Jennifer held up a $5 bill and whispered, "I bet he gets it wrong."

Zoey said, "I'll take that bet."

Gordon looked at his wife and asked, "Would you like to lose $5 more?"

"It's your money, why not."

"I will figure out a way to get it back from you."

Richard asked, "$5 more Zoey?"

"Of course. I suppose you want in on this also Holden?"

"I hate taking your money Zoey, but this is a sure thing."

As they finished their betting, I walked to the front door, opened it, and let Monty in. I asked her if she would like coffee or tea, but she declined.

I returned to my chair, and all eyes were watching me.

I asked, "Is my shirt hanging out of my pants? Is my zipper open? Why are you all looking at me?"

Jen said, "You remembered your birthday; that's amazing."

"It shouldn't be, I had to write it down on so many forms this year, verifying I knew the people who were coming with us, it became 2nd nature to me."

"Okay, I can accept that excuse. Everyone owes $5 to Zoey. She is the only one that bet you would win."

"Thank you, you sweet adorable girl. I still won't go driving with you."

"You won't get me behind the wheel of a car dad."

"How about the bridge of the spacecraft?"

"No, no, no. It will not happen. I am not driving spacecraft."

"You would be bossing your husband around all day."

"When did you say training starts?"

Everyone in the kitchen started laughing, including Gordon.

"Let's get back to the more serious problem, how is a bomb going to get onboard our spacecraft today?"

Monty replied, "Doctor Luck, the ship is sealed. No supplies, no suitcases, no personal items, nothing goes onto the ship today, except people, and even we are going through metal detectors as we board the ship. I don't believe any of us, who have been selected to go, would meet the profile of a mad bomber. There is one that comes close, but I will keep an eye on him for a very long time; a very long time."

"Thank you Monty, I'm sure the other 62 of us on board appreciate you keeping a very close eye on Gordon, and a 24 little turkeys that will start hatching tomorrow."

"If I see a turkey hatchling tomorrow, Gordon is going to be burping feathers."

Gordon asked, "Have you spoken to Janet lately?"

"Did that little tramp help you get those turkeys on board?"

"It sounds as if you are angry with the entire world Monty. I only asked if you spoke with your friend lately. Now it sounds as if you have abandoned her."

"I haven't abandoned her. I have not seen her lately."

"Have your schedules changed?"

"Not that I'm aware of."

"Isn't she supposed to be part of the team who guards Zoey and me?"

"Yes she is."

"A real friend would go out of her way to find out what happened to her former partner."

"Doctor Luck, please let me kill him."

"No. Someone is going to try and blow our spacecraft out of the sky today, and all you can think about is killing one of my children. I should put you over my knee and spank you for thinking so narrowly."

"If you do it dad, I will give you $500 million."

"If you don't keep your mouth closed, I'll give her 2 minutes with you in a closet."

"I'll give you everything I have for those 2 minutes."

"Do you see the difference in those two offers Gordon? You offered me a ton of money. Monty offered me everything. Which one is the greater value son?"

"I'll be quiet."

"Those are the smartest words you have ever uttered."

"Monty, you said no one was bringing anything on board today, is that correct?"

"Yes Doctor it is. The only reason we're using the gangway, instead of the elevators in the legs of the spacecraft, is because it gives everyone a last chance to turn around and wave goodbye. It's also the place where the Honor Guard will transfer control of the remains of President Clark, and Mrs. Julia Atwater to us. The Honor Guard will not enter the spacecraft."

"Get me Jack Daniels on the phone now."

"You're holding the phone dad."

"Oh my god, William are you still there?"

"Where the hell do you think I would be you jackass."

"I'm sorry, I forgot you were there."

"I want you to remember this Even. My speech comes after yours this afternoon, and you will regret it. Why do you need Jack Daniels?"

"From what Lucius told me about Jack, he's not only a fantastic engineer, he is also a great bomb disposal man. If someone removed the remains of President and Mrs. Atwater, and exchanged them with explosive devices, I believe it would be appropriate for Lucius to return these devices to their rightful owners, don't you?"

"You have to leave this planet Even. Only one of us is allowed to think like me, and that's me."

"I don't have to ask you to promise me this will be taken care of, because I know it will be. Our blood sweat and tears have gone into this project, and some asshole thinks he or she is cute enough to slip this one by us."

"Its 10:45 AM Even, didn't you have someplace you wanted to be?"

"You bastard, why did you keep me on the phone so long. I'll get you for this."

"If I were a little younger Even, I would rip your lungs out."

"You couldn't get that close to me. Jennifer would protect me."

"Women, they are the loves of our lives, and the Banes of our existence."

"I didn't mean you Jemma; stop hitting me. Jemma I meant all the other women in the world, not you. Remember you can't kill me until I'm 130 years old, and you are pregnant. Stop hitting me."

"It's wonderful to know that you are the king of your castle William, just like I am king of mine."

"Leave me alone you asshole. I have to see if Jemma is getting ready to pull a 'Lizzie Borden' on me, or if she's just getting a baseball bat."

"Call junior, he will protect you."

"Young William has changed his mind. He seen his mother in action, and has decided his never getting married."

"How much did you bet him on that?"

"I don't believe in wagering when I have a sure thing. I just laughed at him. He was so disheartened, he went out to breakfast by himself."

"Doesn't he know all our waitresses here are redheads?"

"They are not."

"You don't go out to breakfast very often do you?"

"I never go out for breakfast, it's too early in the morning."

"Young William is in for a big surprise. I'm going to change and leave for the NEST."

"If I am still alive, Jemma and I will be there at 1 o'clock."

"Be nice to her William, tell her you hope it's a girl, just like her. It will get you out of a lot of trouble."

"Go to work and leave me alone."

"My work is done, now the fun part begins."

"Find the fucking bomb you asshole."

***********************

"In my humble opinion, I believe William is in trouble. Jemma may not kill him, but he will be hurting, when it comes to the festivities this afternoon."

"I don't know about you dad, but look at the time. Zoey and I are leaving."

"Monty would you open the door for my son please."

Monty smiled broadly. "It will be my pleasure Doctor Luck."

"I think we can wait another minute or 2 for you and mom, dad."

Monty said, "Chicken shit."

"Can I see you for a minute mom?"

"I'll be right there Richard."

I said "I think it's time to leave."

"Why the change of heart dad?"

"You'll hear about it soon if I'm not out of the house."

I headed for the front door, with Zoey and Gordon trailing behind me.

Jennifer yelled, "Even Luck, if you take one more step your dead."

"If I don't outrun you now, I'm going to be dead anyway."

"Sit down Even, before I claw your eyes out."

"Hell dad, what did you do now?"

"I am an engineer, and the scientist. I did what I do best, and now I'm in trouble."

"You mean you got caught doing some reengineering."

"Yes, I believe that's the appropriate term."

Jennifer walked into the kitchen, threw the alarm box, 3 paperclips, 2 Q-tips, four short pieces of wire, and some tape onto the kitchen table. She growled at me menacingly.

I thought I secured the alarm box to the wall securely, with that double-back tape, but apparently the weight of the box was too much for the tape, and it fell off the wall. 

Then, my tattletale son, Richard, knifed me in the back. If I had just a few more minutes, or if we had left earlier, I would have fooled everyone. Now, like my good friend William, I had to face the Lady of the Manor. I would know in a moment if all I was going to lose was one head, or both.

Jennifer said, "You lost all the bets Zoey. This is how your father put his birthday dates into the alarm system. He destroyed the system, rather than acknowledging he didn't know the date of his birth."

She looked at me with a smile on her lips. "Even, you are such a big baby. You would rather use your talents to bypass our alarm system, rather than acknowledge you forgot your birth date, again. 

Everyone who has carried your name for more than one month bet against you, because we know you so well. You can remember a formula down to a microgram, because it's important to you. You remember our anniversary, and each of your children's birthdays, because they are important to you. Your birthday doesn't matter to you, and you have no idea when it is. I'm not going to tell you when it is. This way I can throw you a surprise party anytime I want, and say happy birthday. You will go through life never knowing the day you were born, and do you know what Even; you won't care. It doesn't matter to you. Only your work, your family, and your friends matter to you, and most of the time it's in that order. We don't mind being 2nd on your list, because the time you give us, we have you body and soul, and nothing will tear you away from us. We have you all to ourselves, and we relish every moment of it."

161. The NEST

"I'm going to kill that old man."

"Calm down Even, you are not going to touch a hair on Williams head."

"We're 2 miles from the entrance to the NEST, and we haven't moved an inch in the past five minutes. All these people can't possibly be invited guests."

"Well we know this much, they can't leave without us."

Even's driver said, "Relax Dr. Luck, we will be at the NEST momentarily."

"What are you going to do Frank sprout wings?"

"No doc, something less radical, and more easily arranged."

My phone rang, and it was my daughter calling.

"Hi baby, we are on our way. We're stuck in traffic, but Frank says we should be there shortly, although I don't know how."

"Good morning daddy, soon a big milk truck will pass you going very slowly. I am right behind him, and I have several of our guests behind me. Pull out ahead of me and follow the truck to the NEST. Get ready because here we come."

"Okay baby, we will be waiting."

"Did you know about that Frank?"

"Yes sir, I did."

"You didn't think it was necessary to share that information with me?"

"No, as long as you were only yelling at the Mrs., it wasn't my concern."

"Warren don't open my door. Let me get out Frank's side, I want to hit him."

"That's fine with me Mrs. Luck. Would you like me to hold him for you?"

"No, he won't run away, he would never live it down."

"She doesn't know me very well Warren. I can run away with the best of them."

A short time later, an 18 wheeler rolled by moving slowly southbound, displaying the Borden's Milk Cow 'Elsie' on its side. Fred pulled out quickly and got in behind it. It was my fervent hope that the people traveling northbound on this 2 Lane Road did not wish to pick a fight with a truck this size.

When we reached the turning point for the NEST, we saw what the problem was. Cars were double and triple parked along both sides of the road hoping to get the best vantage point for this afternoon's launch. No one was allowed to turn into our private road, except invited guests. Our agents were standing there, in full protective armor, and with automatic weapons making it very clear we were not playing games.

Our milk truck proceeded on its way to Austin, and we turned into our base and were escorted to the hangar. The invited guests were let off at the discharge point, where they showed their invitations, and were directed to their seats by high school juniors and seniors. When they arrived at their seats, they were given a menu for soft drinks, wine, and finger foods, which would be served at no charge until 2 PM, when the festivities really got moving along.

When Jennifer and I started walking towards the hangar, a little voice yelled out, "Grandpa."

When we turned to see our little red headed monster running towards us, that's exactly what she was, a redheaded monster.

"What happened to you Teddy?"

"Banana split no chocolate syrup. Had strawberry syrup. Love strawberry syrup. Missed my mouth, down my shirt."

"I would love to take pictures of you, but were not allowed to take cell phones with us. You look absolutely adorable."

"Mommy want to kill me. Daddy stop her."

"We have a washing machine and dryer in this building. We will wash, and dry your clothes, until you are all clean. We will wrap you in a giant towel to keep you warm. You will look as good as new. Ask mommy if it's okay."

"Mommy, grandpa take clothes, wash them, make clean, wrap you in towel until dry. Angry with me?"

"No I am not angry with you any longer. I was very angry when you picked up the bowl with your banana split still in it, and tried to drink all the syrup out of it. I'm very happy that is the last ice cream you will ever see."

I kept my mouth shut, because I managed to squeeze 20 gallons of ice cream into our freezers. Other condiments like sprinkles, chocolate and strawberry syrup, and tiny marshmallows would show up also. Children should not have to go without ice cream Sundaes without a weaning off period. Some parents would praise me, one particular parent would probably want to kill me at this moment, and it would not be a figure of speech.

"Gordon check to see if primary and secondary flight crews are here."

"Will do dad."

"Jen when our son comes back with the news of who's here, I want you to lead them on a search of the vehicle. Start on the fifth floor and work your way down. I will get another crew have them start on the first floor and work their way up. I want to make sure the ship is clean before the honor guard comes."

"I'll take care of it Even."

"Remember, on the fifth floor, if you should run into the supplies for the turkeys. Check everything thoroughly. Make sure none of the bags have been tampered with while they were here."

"Yes sir, it will be done."

"You never say that to me at home."

"At home, we are equals. Today, you are master of that vessel. I will follow your orders to the T."

"Thank you dear."

"Mark would you page Col. Jack Daniels to the hangar please. Also, order all engineering staff, flight crews, and future married people to the hangar also."

"Will do, Captain."

"How are you feeling Teddy?"

"Mommy angry with me, I think."

"Should mommy be angry with you? Did you do a bad thing, or a good thing?"

"I like strawberry syrup."

"Teddy did you do a good thing, or did you do a bad thing?"

"Bad thing."

"Should mommy be happy with you, because you did a bad thing?"

"No."

"Why were you at the Creamy Cow this morning?"

"Daddy said if I was good, he would take us to Creamy Cow this morning."

"So you did a good thing to go to the Creamy Cow, and while you with there, you did a bad thing. Do you see how terrible that was? You cheated your daddy and mommy. You tried to fool them into thinking that you would be good, while you ate your ice cream, but you were bad. I would put your nose in the corner all day for doing that to me. All day, no lunch, no dinner, just water, because you made a fool out of me. I would be extremely upset with you."

"I like strawberry syrup. It delicious."

"Is that your excuse for doing something bad?"

"Yes."

"I wonder what Callie would think about that response. Would you like to find out what your new friend would say?"

"Yes please, I think she understand."

"Okay, I'll take you there now."

"Mark, if Colonel Daniels shows up, tell them I went to the ship on the third level."

"Yes sir."

*****************

"Good morning General, how are you today?"

"Grumpy."

"General this is my granddaughter Teddy, I don't believe you two have met."

"It's a pleasure Teddy, what happened to your clothes?"

"Strawberry syrup."

"That will do it every time. Where are you off to Doc?"

"We are going to check with the computer, to make sure everything is okay."

"It sounds good to me. Sign in, and check out when you leave."

"Will do."

"Everyone's being very careful today Teddy. This is a very important day for a lot of people including you and me."

"I know. Someone's going to try to blow us up."

"Why didn't you mention this before?"

"You are already working on it. You need no help."

"Do you have any idea who is doing it, or where they may be placing the bomb?"

"No, no feeling, berry sneaky."

"Okay, let's go see Callie."

When they reached the third floor, Teddy jumped out of my arms and ran to Gordon's position to say hello to her friend.

"Hi Callie, its Teddy, are you ready for today?"

"Good afternoon Teddy, why are you in your underclothes? My systems are 100%, all ancillary systems are in satisfactory condition, nuclear engine is running at .05%, all exterior lines are connected. Four hours and 10 minutes to launch."

"I wanted to talk to you about my underclothes, is that alright?"

"Of course, how can I help you?"

"I can't decide if I did a bad thing, or I did something with an excuse that do not make it bad. Does that make sense?"




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



"It sounds as if you did something bad and are trying to get away with it. According to your father's memory banks, you have tried this twice before, unsuccessfully. Your nose was in the corner of your room for four hours. Is that what you're trying to avoid this time?"

"Can I tell you what happened, before you make a decision?"

"Go ahead."

"This morning I up very early. I thought it time to leave, but not. Dad make pancakes, then mommy and Newton want pancakes. Dad said if I went to sleep, we go to Creamy Cow. I was very good. I went to sleep and didn't get up until daddy woke me. We had lunch. We stop at Creamy Cow. No chocolate syrup. I get strawberry. I never have before. It was delicious, like my mommy. I wanted to drink it from the side of the glass, but my banana split was in it. Everything moved. Syrup missed my mouth, go down my shirt. My mommy very angry with me. My daddy too. Did I do bad?"

"What do you think Teddy? If your mommy and daddy are angry with you, was it a good thing or bad thing?"

Teddy started to cry. Through her tears she said, "It was a bad thing."

"You must remember Teddy, you are only two years old. You are expected to make mistakes like this. You must learn from them, and not do them again. Your parent's anger is expected, but it is only for a short time. They will love you regardless of what you do, as long as you learn not to do it again. Did you apologize to your parents', and tell them that you love them?"

"No, I tried to tell them I was right."

"Now that you know you are wrong, what are you going to do?"

"I tell them I sorry, and not do it again."

"Didn't you leave something out?"

"I love them."

"Why are you talking to me? You know what to do, do it."

"Thank you for being my friend Callie. I see you soon."

Teddy ran to me, and I wrapped her up in the towel.

"Did you learn anything from Callie?"

"Yes, I have to be better."

"You are only two years old, and very soon you will be three. You are not expected to be perfect. I am not perfect either, and I am much older than you are. As we grow older, we try to make less mistakes than we made the day before. As hard as we try, we always fail. Remember, only God is perfect, and he forgives us for most of our failures."

Teddy laughed.

"Teddy, I wasn't being funny."

"I'm sorry grandpa. Grandma wanted to know when you grew up."

"I grew up after the plane crash in Alaska. Ask her to go sleep on the nearest cloud. We have to find the bomb someone planted on this ship to make us fail."

"Can I see my mommy and daddy now?"

"Absolutely."

*********************

William, Jemma, William Junior, and Patrick arrived, and were immediately attacked by reporters. True to his nature, William refused to talk to them. Young William took his place at the microphone.

"Today is a very auspicious day for everyone involved in the "Deep Space Science Project." Since its inception, 9 years ago, led by four people, it has grown into a massive undertaking that I can proudly say for my father and the other 19 members, who have financed this project, has been successful beyond anyone's wildest imagination. Its initial budget was $350 billion. Each investor has already recouped their investment, because this project and its 250 scientists have accounted for 918 patents. The lives of Americans, and people all over the world have been made better, and benefited, because of their efforts. The most obvious one is the development of the Nuclear Fusion Reactor. No longer will the world have to worry about the disposal of waste from Nuclear Fission Reactors. All of you have read about, and seen the young man, who developed and patented this reactor. His name is Gordon Oliver Stars Luck. The son of Mrs. Jennifer and Doctor Even Luck. He was 15 years old when he developed this reactor, and he was not a one patent wonder. I cannot tell you about some of the others he developed, because most of them are national secrets.

His sister, Mrs. Delicious Luck Thyme is responsible for the engines that will lift this amazing craft into the air silently, and without the use of hydrogen, and oxygen, which cause the explosive reaction used to lift the rockets NASA uses. The Federal Government refuses to believe these will work to get anything out of our atmosphere and into space. We will prove them wrong today. We will be out of the atmosphere and into space in less than 90 seconds. 

I will not go into everything else we will do today, and leave it to the speeches you will hear later. You will be stunned into silence, and you will not believe what you hear. However, this spacecraft will transmit back live pictures, and radio transmissions every second of its trip past the moon, Mars and every other planet it passes along its trip past the Kuiper belt and into deep space. It may be possible for some of our scientific equipment to communicate with satellites that are orbiting the earth, or that are stationary in deep space.

We will never see these magnificent people again, as they travel to the next star system looking for Earth 2. They won't be able to set up a signal fire to let us know they found it. It may take generations for a signal to get back from them that they found it. Or they may never find it, but they will keep looking for as long as they live. Thank you very much. I will not take any questions."

Needless to say the press corps started shouting questions to Junior as soon as he finished speaking. He ignored them, walked away from the microphone, joined his family, and began walking towards the stage. He wasn't paying attention where he was going, because he was talking to his mother. He knocked over a beautiful red headed woman, and landed on top of her.

Jemma, William, and Patrick laughed as they saw their son in this very sexual position, but decided to let him try to talk his way out of this problem. They kept walking, and left the two of them alone, on the ground.

Junior did not move. He looked at the woman's face, with his body still positioned between her thighs. He was stunned by her beauty.

She said, "I don't kiss on the first date, and I don't screw in public. Would you mind getting off me?"

"I am so sorry, I was looking at your face and not thinking. May I help you up?"

"You would have to get off me first."

William rolled off her, jumped up, and offered her his hand. He helped her to her feet, and almost began to brush her off, when her eyes glared at him.

"Is that the way you get to feel women up?"

"No, I've been trying to avoid women as attractive as you are all my life. I never wanted to get married. I am not gay, but I find women overpowering. This is not a come online. I just got back from China. I've been there since I was 21, and built up a business that was quite successful. My father recalled me, because he's getting old, and wants me to take over his entire empire. It's quite extensive, and it's going to take me a while to learn, and understand it all. 

I'm sorry I never gave you my name. I am William Zabo Junior. A two-year-old redheaded girl named Teddy, told me I would meet a redheaded girl today. You are Doctor, am I correct?"

"How could you possibly know that? I've never met you before."

"I'm not an ax murderer, but if I can find Teddy, would you come with me to meet her?"

"How do I know you're not an ax murderer?"

"Isn't that evident, I don't have an ax."

"Very funny, I would have to tell my aunt where I'm going."

"You could bring her with us if you'd like."

"I'll ask her if she'd like to come."

After walking through the crowd, and down the line of seats, they reached her aunt.

"Aunt Hannah, this is William Zabo Junior. I'm going with him to meet a little girl, who told him we were going to meet today."

"You're going to meet Teddy, how wonderful."

"How do you know Teddy?"

"I told you I was going on a long trip today, I just didn't tell you how long."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm not going to be at your wedding dear. I'm going to be far, far away. This nice young man will make you a good husband and a great father to your children. You don't need me hanging around you anymore. They need me on that ship, and I've decided to go. I didn't want to tell you before now, because you would have argued with me, until the cows came home. This way is much easier. Enjoy your young man, he will love you and your children forever."

"Hannah, he doesn't even know my name."

"Your name is Gwendolyn, everybody calls you Gwen."

"What's my last name smart ass?"

"Thornhill, it's not the same last name as your aunts."

"This gets scarier by the minute."

Hannah said, "It won't be a once you meet Teddy. Go along now, she's in the hangar.

"I'm going to run away from home, you're scaring me."

"I'm the one running away from home, and I'm running further than you are."

"Hannah stop this, either you are getting nuttier than a fruitcake, or I am."

"Honey just go along with William, and you will have the best life any woman has ever had. Kiss me, and say goodbye. You will see me once more later today, but this will be the last time we will be alone together."

Tears flowed out of her eyes as Gwen let the power of her aunts words sink in.

"I'm going to have to hire a new nurse."

"You're going to be closing your office soon, and moving to South Carolina. You can hire a new nurse there."

"If you knew all this was going to happen, why didn't you warn me? I could have taken a sedative."

"Doctor, you are not allowed to medicate yourself. It's against the rules."

"Sometimes you have to say screw the rules, and save the patient."

"Time is running short, and there is a lot to do. Give me my kiss, say goodbye, and go with your young man. Your wedding will be something for the ages. His father will not accept anything less. Don't argue with William senior, worse still, don't argue with Jemma, you will lose, and you will be badly bruised when she's finished with you. She's 63 years old, and she's pregnant. That is a bad combination."

"You know as well as I do that's not possible."

"Get out your medical history books, and be ready to change them, because Jemma is pregnant. Every 15 years like clockwork, she gets pregnant. She's ready to kill her husband."

"I would agree with her 100%, and plead insanity in court."

"If there was one woman in the jury, she would never be convicted. Get going you two, and enjoy your lives together."

Gwen and Hannah hugged and kissed for the longest time.

"You should have warned me. What am I going to do without you?"

"You are going to do the same thing I am. You are going to have the time of your life. Where else have you ever heard of a 56-year-old woman traveling into deep space because she is needed, and not as excess baggage. They really need me on board that spacecraft, and I was ecstatic when they asked me. Go, before we both start crying."

It was too late for that. William took Gwen's arm, said goodbye to Hannah and began walking down the line of chairs. The flood of tears was already blinding her, and she held on to him for dear life, and for guidance as she walked with him.

Hannah watched her walk away, knowing she was fine, but crocodile tears were flowing down her face, and fogging up her glasses. She was thankful she had tissues and hankies in her bag to wipe her eyes and clean her glasses so she could see her one last time.

*******************

"William, when you tripped me, weren't you with your family?"

"Yes I was."

"Where did they disappear to when you fell?"

"Since Teddy told everyone what was going to happen today, it was a foregone conclusion I was going to fall over a redheaded female. They saw me fall over you, and they saw you were a carrot top. I believe they disappeared laughing to leave us alone. They knew I was dead in the water, because Teddy is never wrong. Never! She is clairvoyant and the things she says always come to pass. 

My mom and dad are as funny a married couple as you ever want to meet. You would never guess the amount of money my dad has because he never flaunts it. A hospital here, in Temple, was being so poorly managed, and the doctors and staff were so bad my father bought the hospital. He didn't clean house as you would expect a new owner to do, he brought in a new attitude. If you don't smile, you are fired. If you aren't nice to the patient, you are fired. It didn't matter if you were in janitor or a doctor, you were out the door. He bought the hospital for around $60 million, put another hundred million dollars into upgrades, and pays the staff better. Now the hospital get applications to work here from Houston, Dallas and Austin. You may ask yourself what does he get out of this largess, and it's easy. The hospital is a 'Non-Profit.' It's a tax write off for him, and trust me he needs tax write offs.

My mom and dad have been married for over 43 years, and have two children 15 years apart. If you watch their interplay, you would swear they are newlyweds. It's been 15 years, and my mom is pregnant again. They are unbelievable, and on time."

Gwen said, "I know my aunt said the same thing, but physically, it's not possible. It's possible for the man, but not possible for the woman."

"When I introduce you to my mother, would you please tell her she can't be pregnant? She will show you the sonogram of the little girl she has inside her."

"Your family is going to rewrite the textbooks, and that is an expensive undertaking."

"You doctors are all rich, you can afford it."

"You said you were rich, and I'm not doing too badly myself. If it's not too personal, how rich is your father?"

"I don't know exactly. I do know is he put down $30 billion to help start up this project. That was before they had all 20 investors lined up. When they had the full complement of the group in the fold, they returned $16.5 billion to him. Each members final cost came in at $17.5 billion, and they will be getting a refund on that also. The project came in $47 billion under budget. When was the last time you heard of a government project coming in under budget?"

"I don't believe I have."

"If the government tells private industry what they need, and tell them to use their own funds to get things done, it will be done cheaper, faster, and better. Keep the government out of business and let them make the laws that keep the public safe. Let the government pay like most businesses do, one third upfront, and then by progress reports. Every time the company meets a particular standard, they get paid more money. If they miss a deadline, money gets deducted. Businesses don't like to lose money, they will make those deadlines, even if they have to keep factories open 24/7."

"Is that what you anticipate doing?"

"I know one thing I am going to do. There are going to be no hungry people in the United States. Then, there are going to be less hungry people in this world, and a lot fewer sick people."

"How do you figure that?"

"One part is going to be your wedding present from me and my extended family. Whether you patent it, or decide to give it away for free is up to you. If there are a lot fewer people that go to bed hungry, the disease rate will go down automatically."

"Does your father know about your plans?"

"He is already doing it. He has a program in place to wipe out hunger in the United States. I will continue his dream, by kicking the federal agencies out of that business. If they don't want to cooperate, because they have their hands in too many pots, and too many people are feeding at the government trough, I'll take to the airwaves and make them look like moneygrubbing idiots.

Once that is accomplished, I'll take it country by country, force the dictators out by feeding the people directly, and teaching them to stand up against their oppressors. If need be, I'll send a private army in and take the dictator apart piece by piece. As soon as that is accomplished, I'll have the UN, and the African Union come in and have them establish order, and form a decent government for the people."

"Do you know how many billions of dollars you are talking about?"

"My father's businesses bring in many billions of dollars a month. They are all legitimate, and they pay their taxes in every country they are in. He has passed every audit the United States government has put him through, and every other country in the world. He has had no problems in any area, including China. While I was there, I did not pay one bribe to any official. Every office in my buildings are bugged, and my employees knew it. Any official that came in and tried to get money out of us was turned into the local prefect of police, and was never heard from again."

"What a way to run a railroad."

"You are right, after a few years no one tried to get money out of us. They tried call girls, they tried passing us notes, they tried phone calls. None of it worked. My suppliers hated me, but my employees loved me. I paid them more than any other business in town, and I paid for their healthcare. They protected me like I was the premier of the country. 

Here we are, get ready to meet Teddy, she will knock your socks off."

"I'm okay with socks, if it's anything higher, you're in trouble."

"Oh my goodness, you are going to meet more than Teddy; most of my family is here."

"Did you plan this?"

"I didn't know I was going to meet you, until you tripped me. How could I possibly plan this?"

"I didn't trip you, you knocked me down."

"You wanted to meet me and you know it. I am a chick magnet."

"Yeah, that's why you hid in China for 14 years."

"Uncle Even, I'd like you to meet someone."

"Congratulations William, I see you've met your redheaded Doctor. Did you attack her, or pull her out of her seat?"

"No, nothing so elegant. She tripped me, and would not let me up."

"Sex before the first date that was fast work William. Are you going to introduce me to Gwendolyn?"

"This is scary William."

I took her hand. "You haven't seen anything yet Gwen. Let me introduce you to our clairvoyant. Teddy will take you by surprise, and you will love her. Everyone take a chair, William has met his new wife."

Gwen said, "I think I should leave."

Teddy said, "56 years married. Good long time."

Gwen replied, "I'm 35 years old, I'm going to live to 91?"

"Him too, die in bed together."

Teddy asked Gwen, "Tell you about beginning of marriage or end?"

Gwen looked at William, "Please tell me about the beginning please."

"Three children, two redhead girls like mommy; one silver head boy like grandpa. William love you forever. He hen-pecked. You love him forever. Live in South Carolina, he take care of space program, and help feed the world. Him Nobel Peace Prize, you Nobel Prize for Medicine, Richard, Holden Nobel Prize for Science, 18 years. All private money, government not happy. Next election, all Representatives out of office. One third Senators out of office. Many changes take place in government bureaucracy. Lawyers out, business people in. Want William President, he say no. Hold me please."

Delicious handed Teddy to Gwen, and they smiled at one another.

Teddy said, "Head please."

Gwen looked around not knowing what she meant.

Delicious told her that Teddy wanted to take her head in her hands.

Gwen bent her head, and Teddy placed both her hands on her temples. Gwen felt something that she couldn't describe, but she knew it was from the contact with the little girls hands.

Teddy frowned as she gently moved her hands away.

"Little tumor behind right eye, must get fixed where grandpa went."

Gwen said, "I just had a physical, and they didn't see anything."

Delicious put an arm around Gwen. "Gwen, if Teddy said there is a tumor behind your right eye, it's there. Please get it checked. If she wants you to go to M.D. Anderson, go there. My father had pancreatic cancer, and they were able to save him."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



William said, "I will have an appointment for you tomorrow morning."

Gwen looked at him and said, "Who died and made you God?"

Teddy said, "Only God perfect, we try hard not make mistake."

Teddy kissed her mother. "I love my mommy. I make mistake. I try harder."

"I love my Teddy. Mommy make many mistakes. She's trying harder too."

Five minutes later William put his cell phone away. 

He said, "That was easy enough."

Delicious asked, "Who was at the hospital on Christmas Day?"

"The assistant administrator; someone has to be there to keep the hospital running."

"The hospital has to be short staffed this week, how did you get Gwen an appointment so quickly?"

"He told me I couldn't get her in for a simple set of x-rays, and have them read by a radiologist in no certain terms. I told him I wanted his best x-ray technician, and his chief of radiology to be there tomorrow morning at 10 o'clock. He said I could go straight to hell. It's not going to happen. 

I told him it was a shame the hospital was going to miss out on a $5 million donation. He said the chief of radiology and their senior x-ray technician would be there waiting for her."

Gwen's mouth dropped open. "You paid $5 million for me to have x-rays, and have them read tomorrow morning?"

"It's tax-deductible."

"You're out of your damn mind."

"What good is a doctor who is blind in one eye?"

I put my arm around Gwen's shoulder, and kissed her head. 

"Gwen, Young William spent $5 million to make sure you stay healthy, and has given money to a charity, which happens to be a tax deduction? William senior's businesses will most likely make $100 million in the next 24 hours. Do you think he is going to miss the $5 million his son spent on you today?

Things are going to happen to you that you never saw coming. If you want to buy a hospital or build one, all you are going to have to do is write a check. The man who stumbled over you this morning is going to be the richest man in the world. The more money he gives to charities, the more money his businesses will earn."

"William told me it was all legitimate, is that the truth?"

"His father's businesses are all legitimate. However, William Senior has been forced to deal with some very unsavory characters through the years. Junior has never been involved in any of those transactions. Whether senior tells Junior about it is up to him. I can tell you from personal knowledge that William senior was instrumental in getting the former vice president of the United States not to run for president. The man was an anathema to this country, and William found out through sources that were not so clean themselves what he was up to. We could not have a president that was owned by subversive influences. 

William came up with a plan that forced him to expose his weaknesses. You saw what happened on television, and the reruns of it for weeks afterwards. It was the funniest thing I ever saw. Having him pick up Patrick to protect himself from bullets that were fired at a firing range weeks before, and played on tape from a truck that was in flames, and was carrying fireworks, was a stroke of genius. William had nothing to do with what happened to the vice president after that. It was just error after error that forced him to leave the country."

Gwen laughed. "It was all my patients could talk about, when they came into the office. Even though they were sick, they laughed as they were talking about that video. I know from reading about it that the FBI and local authorities went through those woods, with a fine tooth comb, looking for shell casings, they didn't come up with anything. It was an amazing plan, and funny as heck."

"The best part was it could not come back at William. He was there to offer the vice president $500 million to help him run for the presidency. He listed all the wonderful things the vice president did as a senator, and vice president, when all hell broke loose. 

You have to hand it to that camera man. He kept the camera on the vice president at all times. He didn't duck or run for cover. He did his job, even though he could have lost his life doing it."

********************

Everything was going along beautifully as Gwen met most of our family that day. Then two things happened that made my blood run cold. A voice I knew too well yelled, "There you are you dumb sonofabitch," and Zoey yelled, "Mom!"

I turned around and laughed. I sent Dycke a sky blue flight suit to wear to the ceremonies. If anyone deserved to wear one he did. However, the one I sent him was for a man extra thin/extra tall and long. He was none of these. 

The son of the bitch wore it. He had cuffs up to his elbows and his knees. The little bit of belly he had was prominently displayed. I was hysterical. I laughed so hard I wound up on the floor.

He looked down at me with a grin on his face. "Well Doctor, aren't you happy with my appearance? This is what you wanted me to wear on the most important day of my companies' life, and mine. If you don't mind I'll wear a suit and tie, while I'm up on the stage today. 

I put this abomination on in the car, while we were on the way here. I've never heard Payne laugh so hard in her life. I am memorialized in her camera forever. I can guarantee you those pictures will be all around my office in January. What do you have to say for yourself Doctor?"

I got up and hugged him. "I don't care what happens to you, I'm leaving town at 5 o'clock."

"You're not leaving town, you leaving this world. Don't you dare come back."

"I've got to find the bomb first."

"What bomb?"

"I have to say hello to your wife first."

"Fuck my wife, tell me about the bomb."

"You don't really mean that do you Dycke?"

"Mean what, about the bomb?"

"No, you told me to fuck Payne. Do you really want me to fuck her after what you saw?"

"Hell no, she'd faint if she saw that thing. Can we get back to the bomb please?"

"I know in my heart someone is going to try to destroy our project. There are too many people who want us to fail. They want us to do it dramatically.

I believe I know how they're going to try to do it, but we're going to do a sweep of the ship beforehand just to be sure. I'm about to issue everyone their orders. Stay here, and I'll be with you in a minute."

"You expect me to stand here, and do nothing, while you walk away talking about my spacecraft? You are out of your fucking mind."

"It's our spacecraft, and I knew you would not stand still, but it was worth a chance."

"I hope they stick you out at the end of the Mickey Mouse ears for a week."

"I could come back on one of the rockets you built for us."

"I take it back. Please stay out there. I haven't had a headache, since we finished the ship."

"You haven't received the first four orders from my boys yet? They were mailed out three weeks ago."

"Please tell me you're kidding Even, I'm not ready for number 2 yet."

"Those orders were not for number 2 Dycke, they were for number 3."

"Even, I hate you."

I hugged him again, and told him I hated him too.

I walked to the center of the hangar and clapped my hands to get everyone's attention.

"Thank you for being here so early for today's mission. We have one added attraction none of us anticipated. Is Adam Schiff here?"

"I'm here Doctor Luck."

"I suspect you have Laura with you."

"No sir, I'm with Laura. She's making sure I don't get lost."

"There's no easy way to say this so I'm just going to say it quickly. There may be a bomb on board. We're going to be breaking up into three groups. Adam you are a group of one. You are the only one who knows the bowels of the ship. Anyone who went inside, without knowledge of it, would quickly get lost. An inexperienced bomber would probably have stayed close to one of the entrances to the inside plumbing areas. I want you to take a radio, go in there, to see if anything's been tampered with. Are you okay with that?"

"Yes sir, I know what to do."

"Get going Adam, and take everything you need. If you find anything out of the ordinary, DON'T TOUCH IT. CALL FOR COLONEL DANIELS'."

"DON'T TOUCH IT." That's Laura's favorite saying sir."

Laura hit him in the ribs for that remark.

"It was a joke Laura."

"It was a joke at my expense Adam."

"Oh good, at least you knew it was a joke."

***************

"Flight deck crews; Jennifer is your boss. You will start on the fifth floor, and work your way down to the third floor. Look everywhere from the vents to the rear of the cabinets. If a suitcase is unsealed open it. If anything looks tampered with, check it out. If it looks really suspicious, don't touch it, call for help."

"Engineering deck are all of you here?"

"We are short two people Doctor Luck."

"Leave their names with Mark so he can tell them where to meet you. Monty you will be in charge of the engineers. Keep them focused on what they are doing so they are not running around in circles. Start on deck 5 and then up to deck 4. We will all meet on Deck 3. Check everything, including as much of the nuclear reactors confinement area as you can see, especially in the safe area above it. It would be a perfect place to hide a little bomb, and cause maximum damage. 

Don't forget the elevator shafts in the landing gear, and the heavy lift cargo port. If we get our blue suits dirty, they get dirty, but we will go into space, without any worries."

"Jack are you here?"

"I'm here, Even."

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is Colonel Jack Daniels. He is one of the finest engineers, and demolition experts you will ever meet. If you find something, or need help, he is your man. He will be located on the third floor. If you find anything suspicious, or you are sure it's the bomb, call him, and he will disarm it 'outside the spacecraft.' The operative words are 'outside the spacecraft.' We don't want any explosions inside this craft. 

"This little person standing next to me, in the ill-fitting flight suit is Dycke Schneider. He and his company built this marvelous craft. He knows every nook and cranny of it. If you have any questions, he will be on the third floor with[RG1]  the Colonel to answer them. Since I have covered everyone's assignments, I am going to have something to eat, and take a long nap while all of you work your fingertips to the bone. Okay people off to work, quietly, quickly, and efficiently. Leave nothing to chance, just like we trained. We don't want the public to know anything is wrong."

Everyone booed me, as they set off to do their given chores, knowing that I was going to be working as hard as they were to see if any explosive device was on board the Good Luck 1.

****************

Adam and Laura were walking towards the spacecraft, when she punched his left arm.

"Dammit Laura that hurts."

"I did that on purpose. I wanted to remind you that your left arm is not fully healed. I don't want you to play around in there. You do not have two strong arms to get yourself around those pipes like you normally do. Please be careful, because if I have to come in there to get you, I'm going to break your neck."

"What did George tell you to say, rather than threatening me? Instead of going all hostile on me what are you supposed to say? Come on Laura say it."

"Dammit Adam this is hard for me. I've always been hostile towards men. It's going to take me a while to get over it. I love you Adam Schiff, and I don't want you to get hurt in there. I don't want to lose you. Please be careful or I'll break your fucking neck."

Adam pulled her to his body, and kissed her. "Was that so hard love? Was that so terrible? That was a great beginning, even though I could have done without the end. What is it about my neck that you want to break it all the time?"

"I'll tell you when you come out of there in one piece. If you come out of there in more than one piece, as I'm breaking your neck, I'll tell you."

"That sounds fair. Now kiss me so I can go to work."

"Go slowly Adam, and please don't get hurt. If you do, there will be no tomorrow morning."

"That's downright mean Laura. Can I at least practice 'The bottom is the top, and the top is the bottom?

"Absolutely not, you almost got laid this morning, because of that exploratory mission. I invented that routine for you, and now you have a doctorate in it."

"If I don't practice daily, I could lose my edge, and I may forget things that you may want me to remember. I could go from a doctorate, to a freshman. You wouldn't want that to happen, would you?"

"If you forget anything, I will remind you by biting your dick. I'm sure that will remind you that you left something important out."

"You are threatening me again, which means you must apologize in the way George told you to. Come on say it."

"I can't, we are right by the dignitaries' box, and everyone's looking at us."

"They are going to watch us get married in a few hours. I think we are allowed to kiss, before I go to work."

"Adam, my mother is watching us, and she has a camera in her hands."

"Why don't we give her a picture she will keep forever in the Valentino family album? I love you Laura Valentino, and I will never disappoint you again. Kiss me."

"If these people start applauding, you better run for your life."

"I'm not running from my wife."

"You are a real bastard Adam." She moved in close, put her arms around his neck, and kissed him passionately. It wasn't a short kiss, it was the kind of kiss that affirmed her love for him.

When they came up for air, she said, "Go to work, and find that fucking bomb. I want to know that my stasis chambers work."

This time he kissed her, and although it was shorter, it was just as meaningful.

"Go sit with your parents; this could take me between two and three hours. I have my radio, and everything is going to be fine."

"I love you Adam, come back to me."

"I love you Laura, and nothing could keep me away." He smacked her on her butt, and ran towards the ship. Everyone in the dignitary area laughed, and applauded.

Laura wanted to take off after him, and rip him to shreds. She decided against it, and moved towards her parents. She kissed her mother, and father, and her eyes turned misty.

Patty said, "If you start now, we will need gallons of water to hydrate ourselves by 5 o'clock. I have some surprises for you that should make you feel better. Turn around."

Laura turned him and saw Anna and Cloudy standing behind her. She screamed and jumped for joy.

"You little bitch, you told me Cloudy could not come, and you wouldn't come without him, because it was Christmas."

"Cloudy has a very nice boss. Dycke stuffed us in one of his airplanes, and flew us down here yesterday. We were allowed to see mom and dad, but we were not allowed to see you until today. From the looks of things, I would say you and your young man are getting along very well. Are you fucking or not?"

"No we are not. I made a promise to myself to remain a virgin, until I was married. Adam has made me keep that promise. There were times I wanted to do it, but he refused. He told me one day I may regret my decision to break my vow, and he didn't want to be the one who was to blame."

"He's quite a man. Is he a virgin also?"

"No, he is very experienced. When we go out, many of his former female flames come up to him, and ask if we are monogamous, or if we would like to do a threesome. I must blush bright red, because Adam laughs at me every time it happens. He tells them we are monogamous, but thanks for the offer. Some of these women are knockouts, and I wonder what he sees in me. If we were staying here on earth, I could say it's the money. However, we're leaving, and money has nothing to do with it. We love each other, it's pure and simple. Who would have ever thought of me falling in love?"

Robert said, "You could have fallen for me and sex. I am very active that way."

"Holy crap, what did dad do to pry you out of bed with a woman, to come to see your sister get married and leave this planet behind?"

"He was very sneaky Laura, sneakier than mom. He called the Chief Justice and asked him to shame me into coming here today. You don't say no to the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. It's just not done, especially when you're sleeping with his four daughters. Bad things could happen to you if you upset him and his wife."

Laura looked at her father. "Way to go dad."

"You have to hit your brother where it hurts the most dear, and we all know where to hurt him, don't we?"

"We all know he wouldn't hurt for long dad. He could always go back to the University of Michigan for a Doctorate in Sex Education. Every female on campus would line up at his door to take that class."

Robert said, "I never thought about that possibility. If the governor does not win the primary for the Presidency, I think I'll do it. Thank you Laura, thank you very much."

"I'm so glad I won't be here to see it. I'll be more than 100 billion miles away, and he won't have one lawsuit against him, because all the females will be coming to him, and not the other way around."

"Laura stop egging your brother along. Keeping four females happy has kept him toned, and his cardiovascular health is wonderful. Taking on 8 to 10 females a day, would be too much for any ordinary male, although he did try when he was 16 years old. 

Yes Robert I know all about it. I was the one that had to clean out your condoms from the waste paper baskets in the bedroom of the house next door to ours. I don't know how you ever made it to school."

"It was all those push-ups and leg lifts mom. They kept my legs in great shape. The track coach wanted me on the team because I ran so fast. I turned him down, because it would have interfered with my extracurricular activities."

Anna laughed. "Brother, all you had was extracurricular activities. Your dumb act worked perfectly on all of us. We did all your chores, while you were screwing every girl in school. I don't understand why dad didn't realize you were going through so many condoms in a week, and he kept buying you more."

Stephano said, "It was easy. Robert kept showing me condoms that supposedly broke during the act of sex. I was not prepared for Robert to have children, or us to have grandchildren running around, at the same time your mother was running around the house with a gun in her hand."

Robert said, "I have an announcement to make of major proportions. The in- vitro fertilization of the Governor of Maryland has been successful. She is one month pregnant."

"Congratulations Robert, you're going to be a father."

"I'm sorry to say I am not the father. I am not at liberty to say who is."

Stephano was eyes opened wide. "The Chief Justice, her father fathered the baby, didn't he? They are not related by blood, so there is no health problems to worry about in the future. It's true, isn't it? Fred Hastings is the father of the baby."

"I am not at liberty to say dad, and it's a promise I will keep to my death."

"Good boy, I'm very proud of you. When will she announce it?"

"We haven't decided yet. It will either be New Year's Eve or New Year's Day. The problem is very few people will read the paper on New Year's Day because it's a Wednesday. They won't read anything, except for the sports pages. We want more people reading about her, than football scores or about the ball dropping in Times Square."

Stephano said, "Shouldn't that be easily done Robert? 

The headline should read:

'Governor may be expecting triplets or quads after in vitro fertilization?' 

An informed source close to the governor's entourage let slip that the governor was amazed when she was told there was a possibility of... "So on and so forth..." 

Everyone knows going into in vitro fertilization there is always the possibility of multiple births, so it's not a lie. It's a perfect opening for Friday's newspapers, and the Sunday talk shows will be all over it.




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



Fox News will blast her saying, "How can a mother of four or more children run the state of Maryland effectively. Everyone else will applaud her for being pregnant, and give her a wait and see attitude on running the government of Maryland. We both know she is going to do a fantastic job, and in 6 or 10 years she's going to be ripe to run for the presidency."

"Dad, you are amazing. I never thought of that, and Hannerty will be made to look like a fool."

"That's what fathers are for Robert, to make their sons look great."

"Will the testosterone group be more in tune with the day's events, because they are supposed to be about me? I'm getting married, which should be enough to shock all of you, but Monday, Anna becomes the richest member of the family."

Anna did her Rocky impression and told Robert to be careful, because she could now crush him under the weight of her money.

"I never cared about money, although it is nice to have. I have four beautiful women at my disposal, and believe it or not they all love me. At the beginning, it was just for the sex. Now we all have wonderful personal relationships. I know I'm 20 years younger than they are, but I will never leave them, because they mean so much to me."

Patty said, "When Sandy's eight years of the presidency is over, you better move to Utah. They don't approve of multiple marriages, but they tend to look the other way at them. What are you going to do about the children Robert?"

"I'm going to help raise them as my own mom. I had two great parents, well one great parent, and one flaky one, but I turned out all right, and so did my sisters. I think I can help my ladies raise wonderful children, and get them ready for what the world challenges them to do."

"Stephano, am I wrong, or did that sound like our son is growing up?"

"Our son must have figured out a way to send us his clone. Robert would never have said words like 'raise them as my own,' or 'my ladies' in a cogent paragraph. He would have run away from responsibility for children, and told the women exactly where to go, because they were so old."

"Okay, you two win. I can tell you why I've changed so radically and so quickly. I've been sitting at the right hand of Judge Hastings. When the Chief Justice talks to you, on a one to one basis, and it's not about the law, you learn things about life, and living on the edge very quickly. He is an amazing man, and he can talk to you about anything from the beginning of written language, to what we are about to see today, with ease and precision. There are things he told me I can never repeat, not even on my deathbed. He took four ordinary students, and made them into doctors, and lawyers. Now one of them is the governor of Maryland. I could tell you the tricks he pulled to make Clark Atwater president, but it would take all day, and today is Laura day, so we will discuss that at a later time. I've never said this before Laura, I have always envied your brilliance, and I love you."

Robert and Laura were always standoffish as children, and remained that way as they grew into adults. Today that vanished as they closed the gap between them, hugged each other, and tears flowed down their faces.

Laura punched him in the stomach, so hard, Robert doubled over. "You bastard, we could have been friends all these years, instead of adversaries."

Robert laughed. "Yes, but look at all the fun we would have missed."

"You know both Anna and I could take you apart if we wanted to?"

"I couldn't take you, but I could take the shrimp apart anytime I wanted to. All I have to do is take off the shell."

Anna screamed, and jumped at her brother's head. Robert pivoted to his left, caught her under his arm, and smacked her rump so hard she screamed.

"If you don't stop acting like a child, I'll drop your drawers and smack you on your bare ass Anna."

Not to be outdone, Anna joined her hands together to make a fist and brought them down viciously to the back of Robert's left knee. He grunted as his knee collapsed, and he fell to the ground, releasing his sister in the process.

Anna bounced up and jumped on Roberts' back as he was tending to his knee. She wrapped her legs around his midsection, and her arms around his throat.

He said, "Sis if you don't release me, I'm going to stand up and fall backwards. I outweigh you by 90 pounds, and guess who is going to get severely injured when we hit the ground."

"Enough you two, we have a gym in the main building, and if you wish to continue this nonsense, you can do it tomorrow. There is a good hospital nearby that will be able to take care of your broken bones. Kiss and make up, before I knock your heads together."

"Dad, you've never acted this forceful before."

"Nine years of working with agents that could kill you with one finger, getting shot at from across the street, and your mother threatening to kill me if I kept information from her will do that to you. Now do what I said and stop this shit."

As they kissed, Patty pushed the button on her camera, and didn't take her finger off the button until well after they separated. She was after the look in their eyes, more than the kiss itself. She thought she got what she wanted.

162. Lost and Found

The search was the most meticulous ever done. Any military or police force in the world would have been impressed by the way the crew of the Good Luck 1 took up the challenge to find a bomb that might or might not be in the ship.

Jack, Dycke, and I were on the third floor searching the flight deck, inch by inch. Jack asked me if anyone had checked the inside of the computer.

I believe I knocked him over, when I said, "Ask Callie if anyone tampered with her."

He replied, "Who is Callie?"

"She is our computer. Introduce yourself to her, and she will tell you almost anything you need to know, within your designation on the ship."

"You are shitting me Even?"

"Sit in the center chair, and see for yourself. Tell her a lie first."

"Okay Doctor, you asked for it."

"Callie, this is Doctor Luck, I want you to shut down the nuclear engine."

"Voice verification indicates you are not Doctor Luck. Identify yourself, or I will call security."

"Callie that was a test. My name is Jack Daniels, and I would like to know if anyone tampered with you in the last four days."

"Hello Colonel Daniels, no one has tampered with any of us during that timeframe."

"Let me extend that timeframe. Has anyone placed an explosive device inside you since you were installed?"

"No Colonel Daniels, since our systems were brought online, no attempt has been made to open our access panels. The only areas I cannot verify, are the cables going to my power source."

"Callie, how many access panels are there to the cables?"

"37."

"Would you please print them out for me?"

"Printing."

In an instant, the printing was done.

I said, "Since you built the ship Dycke, you get the extra access panel. It only seems fair."

"You are going to be a pain in the ass until 5 o'clock this afternoon, aren't you Even?"

"You wouldn't have me any other way Dycke."

Jack asked, "Are you two married, because it sure sounds that way?"

"Jack, after six years of working hand in glove, we finish each other's sentences now."

"I don't want either of you standing behind me. You two have me worried."

"You definitely don't want Even standing behind you. You'll think you are mating with an elephant."

"I'm not going to ask you how you obtained that personal information. You stay away from me too."

"Jack you take access panels 1 through 12. I will take 13 to 24, and that leaves you with the rest of them Dycke."

"I knew you would say it that way Even. With your limited education you can't count higher than 24, except maybe in children."

"Go to work, before I take it out, and smack you with it."

Jack said, "That's it, I'm out of here."

**************

'As a matter of pure chance', Gordon was a member of the team that inspected the room containing the supplies for the turkeys. While the three other members searched the room, he searched the bathroom. He checked to make sure that none of the bags containing the food, and sand had been tampered with. He moved each bag silently to make sure the bomb was not hidden by their bulk. When his search was over, he joined the other members of his team to complete the search of the room. The bomb was not found.

On the first floor, Monty wished she had a whip. Scientific engineers were great at what they did, but when it came to searching for something as obvious as a bomb, they had no clue. They would search under desks without moving the chairs out so they had an unobstructed view. They would not empty waste paper baskets to see if the bomb was underneath the waste. They were impossible, and for the first time in a long time, Gordon was not the first person on her list to kill.

Stephen, a nuclear technician, seemed to be the only exception to the rule. He climbed onto the safe area above the nuclear engine confinement area to verifying nothing was there. He was like a snake, crawling into the smallest areas looking for the bomb. She knew he didn't need watching so she kept her eyes focused on the others. As he entered the security office he was again on his stomach looking for the slightest area where a bomb could be placed.

Monty saw him crawl in, shook her head, and walked off.

As soon as Stephen saw her walk away, he lifted the access panel, under the desk, to get to the turkey eggs. One by one he turned them over, and when he was finished with the 24th egg, gently placed the container in the area with the two fake mother turkeys, the sand, straw, water, and food. He flipped on the switch for the heat lamp and set the thermostat at 84°. He turned on the motion detector, because the little birds were supposed to start to emerge from their calcium homes soon. Once that happened, their fake mothers would begin to move also. With the bright lights, their mommies, close at hand, and everything they needed to thrive at their little beaks, they would have all the comforts of home.

When Monty returned, she found him dissecting the file cabinets.

Stephen asked, "Monty do you think we should move this away from the wall to see if there's anything behind it?"

"No Stephen, there would be marks on the floor showing it had been moved previously. I think it's safe to say nobody touched it. Did you find anything else in here?"

"Yes I did." He reached into his pocket and pulled out three dust bunnies, and showed them to her.

"Stephen, if you were not doing such a good job, I'd smack you upside the head. Go back to work."

"Yes ma'am."

He did, searching as meticulously as he did previously. Nearly 2 hours later every floor was completely searched, and the 37 access panels had been checked also. No bomb was found.

I said to Dycke and Jack, "They are going to bring it in using the urns of President Clark and Mrs. Julia Atwater. It's the only other way they can destroy the ship. They know we are placing the urns on the flight deck. If the blast is strong enough, it will destroy the computers, the flight deck, and the primary flight crew. We will lose all flight control options, and crash. How do we stop that Jack? We can't leave the urns behind, it was in there Will."

"If their ashes aren't in the urns, we can leave them behind. All we need is an x-ray machine to see what's inside them."

"Jack, I love you."

"Stay away from me Even."

"Let's go outside, I have to speak to William."

"Why?"

"I'm getting you an x-ray machine. The one in the ship is not ready to be used yet. We will get a portable machine from the hospital."

"I don't think anyone at the hospital will argue with the owner."

"If they want to be working tomorrow, they won't."

*********************

William, Jemma, and Patrick were in with the dignitaries having a wonderful time. Many of them couldn't believe he got Jemma pregnant, and asked who the real father was.

Jemma laughed at them. "Hell, I want to know who the mother is."

Everyone had a good laugh, and they talked about what a wonderful day they were having, and it was the perfect Christmas present for everyone to be here to watch the Good Luck 1 travel into deep space.

I walked up behind William, but could not sneak up on him, because everyone gave me a way.

"Here comes Doctor Luck," they said before I got there, so William turned to greet me. We hugged each other, and I wished him a Merry Christmas.

I said to him quietly, "I need a Christmas present now. I need a portable x-ray machine, and a way to process the film instantly. We believe someone is going to try to put a bomb on board using the urns of the president and his wife."

"Will this ever stop Even?"

"No William, it won't. We are threatening too many big businesses of their livelihood. If they can't feed off the government, who are they going to feed off of? What they don't realize is what we have realized. Space is not a losing proposition. Space is a winner. Space is the future. How long did it take you to recoup your investment in this project? They don't realize they could do it too. They are afraid of you and people that think 50 to 100 years ahead. Their business models think 10 maybe 15 years ahead. They are dinosaurs waiting to die."

"Are you sure you have to leave today? You sure know how to make an old man feel good about himself."

"There is nothing wrong with your ego William. Have you met your daughter yet?"

"Yes, I saw my son laying between her thighs, but that was all?"

"She is wonderful. She is Jemma in the flesh. Bright, beautiful, and will give William the strength he needs to go forward with his dreams. He is going to complete your dreams. You have a great son, and when Patrick comes of age, he will make you very proud also."

"Where are they now?"

"I left them with my daughter, Teddy, Newton, and Gray. Teddy told Gwen she has a small tumor behind her right eye and she has to go to Anderson to have it removed. Gwen told everyone she just had a physical and everything was fine. Delicious told her if Teddy says it's there, it's there, and get it taken care of now.

Junior called Anderson, spoke to the assistant administrator, and told him who and when he wanted Gwen to have the x-rays done.

The guy told him to go to hell, because it wasn't happening.

Junior doesn't have your tact down quite yet, but he's getting there. He told the guy it was a real shame that the hospital was going to lose a $5 million donation. Gwen has an appointment at 10 o'clock tomorrow morning."

William senior said, "That's my boy."

"Oh I forgot to tell you, he didn't answer the guy, he just hung up. He's got that part down perfectly."

"The acorn doesn't fall far from the tree."

"Would you please get me my x-ray machine now?"

William punched the number into his cell phone, and told whoever answered it what he wanted in no uncertain terms and hung up. He called the police department, and told whoever he spoke to that the hospital had to deliver a piece of equipment to the NEST urgently. He didn't care what it cost, but they needed an escort now.

William shocked me when he said, "Thank you."

Junior walked into the area pulling Gwen with him.

I said goodbye, because this was going to be a family affair.

Senior turned to greet his future daughter, but Jemma pushed him out of the way.

Junior was getting ready to introduce Gwen to his mother when Jemma pushed him into a seat, kissed Gwen and hugged her so tight she nearly crushed her bones.

She took both of Gwen's hands and said, "Ravishing, just ravishing. We have so much to talk about. I never thought my son would get married, he was always afraid of strong women, I can't imagine why. His father runs all over me and I never complain. I'm sure you already know you're going to be living in South Carolina, but your wedding is going to be in New York. Your wedding dress is going to be made by Carolina Herrera, and will be to talk of the next century. We are sorry about your parents, it must've been very hard for you to lose both of them at one time. Are you a religious? Teddy didn't tell us if you were or not. Regardless, we can accommodate you in any manner you wish. We know your aunt is leaving today, but do you have a large extended family that you would like to it attend your wedding? We will arrange everything, and it will cost them nothing. They will be treated to the finest of everything: limousines, hotels, meals, plays, everything, they will be treated the whole New York experience."

"Mom would you shut up and let Gwen speak?"

"William if you talk to me like that one more time you will attend your wedding with casts on your legs. Now, where was I..."

As she began speaking a handkerchief was stuffed into her mouth, and both of her hands were grabbed. A scarf was put over her mouth and tied behind her head. Another scarf was used to bind her wrists behind her back. Once she was secured she was forced to sit in a chair. She was absolutely livid, and looked for the culprit, who she knew was her husband. She stared at him with her eyes on fire, which normally made agents run from her. William senior stood his ground and glared back at her.

"Jemma you have two choices, you can sit there and act like a lady, or I can have our agents take you home and tie you in bed until I return later this evening. You have no other options. You disgraced yourself just now. You are not queen of this ball, you are a pawn. You never tell a bride what she is going to do, you ask her what she would like, and then you accommodate her. Using Carolina is fine, but if you tell Gwen what fabrics to use, you will be barred from her salon. This is going to be Gwen's wedding, not yours. She will make the rules, not you. You will not set the date of the wedding, or the place of their honeymoon. All you can do is ask. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"

Jemma did not acknowledge him or his rules.

"You have five seconds to say yes or be sent home 5-4-3-2-" 

Jemma acquiesced and nodded her head.

"I know that gag is probably very uncomfortable. If you promise not to say one word, I will have it removed. I mean one word Jemma. If you break your promise, you go home. Yes or no?"

She nodded her head again.

Isaac was standing behind her, and whispered into her ear, "Mrs. Zabo, I'm right behind you. If you break your promise, I will gag you again and drive you home."

Jemma was getting tired of nodding her head, but she did.

Isaac removed the scarf around her head, and the handkerchief from her mouth. Her hands were still bound behind her, but it was the use of her mouth she missed the most. Her husband would pay dearly when they got home this evening. She sat in the chair like a prim and proper wife, and she hated it.

Young William took a position by Gwen's side. "Dad, I'd like you to meet Gwendolyn Thornhill, very soon to be my wife if she'll have me. Gwen, I'd like you to meet my father, William Anthony Zabo, the patriarch of our family."

"Hello Gwen, I've been waiting to meet you ever since Teddy told us you were coming into our lives."

"Hello Mister Zabo, it's a pleasure to meet you. All William talks about is your wife and you. Honestly, I was expecting an outburst like that from your wife. William warned me that she was a powder keg waiting to be lit by a match, and I was the match. He was correct. I am quite like her when I get going on a particular subject. If I think I am correct, and I have a point I want heard, no one is going to keep me quiet."

Young William groaned, "Oh God no, I'm marrying mom."

Senior laughed at him. "How many times have you said since you returned home that you wanted to marry a woman just like your mother? It appears your wish has been granted."




There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 34



"Shoot me please dad, it will be less painful."

Gwen slipped her arm in his. "Remember, Teddy said we were going to be married for 56 years. I'm going to be torturing you for a long time."

"Dad helped me please."

"No one told you to have sex in public."

"She tripped me."

"You knocked me over."

"Go say hello to your mother. If you want to talk about being tortured, think of me when I get home tonight."

"Yes dad, I think mom will have a few things to say to you tonight."

"I'm not worried about the things she will say to me. I'm worried about the things she is going to do to me."

"There is always the couch."

"She's done it to me there too."

"You have to start slowing down dad, you are getting old."

"I'll slow down one dead."

****************

"Mom, I would like to introduce you to Gwendolyn Thornhill, very soon to be my wife."

Jemma nodded her head, knowing the restriction she was under.

William senior said, "You may have a conversation with your son, and his fiancée, but be very careful Jemma."

"Hello Gwen, I would like to apologize for my behavior. I got a little carried away; no I got a lot carried away. Something I never thought would happen, is happening to my little boy, and it couldn't happen to a more wonderful person than you. I am so pleased that you are coming into our family, your addition to it is my greatest pleasure."

"Thank you Mrs. Zabo, did you hear what your son had to say a moment ago about who he's marrying?"

"No I didn't."

"I said to your husband that I'm quite like you when I have a point of view I wish to get heard, and nothing will stop me from getting my point across. William here said 'Oh no, I'm marrying my mother.' Your husband replied 'How many times have you said since you've returned, you want to marry a woman just like your mother. It appears your prayers have been answered.'

Jemma laughed. "God bit you in the ass, didn't he William?"

"Don't gloat mother."

"Gwen don't you have something to say to my mother in reference to her physical condition?"

"No, not that I know of."

"You're going to chicken out on me now aren't you? You're not going to ask her how a 63-year-old woman is pregnant, and it's against all the medical textbooks."

"There are always exceptions to what's in the textbooks William."

"Aren't you the one that said you were anti-gun?"

"Yes I am anti-gun."

"Did I tell you I just changed and became a lifetime member of the NRA?"

"Did I tell you that our children are going to be adopted?"

"Mom, she is as evil as you are."

"You shouldn't have fallen all over her on the way in. There must've been other redheads in the crowd."

"I didn't fall all over her, she tripped me."

"Is that why you were trying to fuck her on the walkway?"

"We were not having sex, it was just the way I landed on her."

"As a lifetime member of the NRA, that may be as close as you ever get to that area of my body."

"We're not even married yet and I am getting cut off. I'm going back to China, I was always safer there."

"Chicken shit."

*******************

At 1:45 PM the horn sounded advising everyone to take their seats, because the festivities were going to begin at 2 PM. People without assigned seats began scurrying to any open seat, while people in the dignitary area presented their credentials and were escorted by agents to their assigned seats.

Jeff waited all afternoon for her to show up, and finally he saw her again. He still could not believe she was in her late 60s, because she was stunning. Raquel Welch handed him her credentials, and he welcomed her warmly.

"If you would follow me Ms. Welch, I will escort you to your seat."

Walking down the rows was now like an obstacle course. Women had their handbags, coats, and umbrellas lying on the ground, and he had to move each one out of the way to make sure Raquel did not trip and injure herself. When he reached her seat he stood up quickly and turned, brushing up against both her breasts.

"I'm terribly sorry, I didn't realize you were that close to me."

"It's perfectly all right, is this my seat?"

"Yes Ms. Welch it is. I hope you have your camera with you, because you will have a perfect view of the takeoff."

"Yes I do, and I have my crew standing by the beach waiting to see it moving through the sky."

"Tell them to have their film on high speed, because once The Good Luck 1 finishes hovering, and gets moving, you're not going to believe how fast it goes."

"Thank you for the information Jeff, I'll call them and let them know."

"Enjoy your day Ms. Welch."

***************

"Uncle Even have you seen Adam?"

"No, hasn't he checked in with you yet?"

"No he hasn't, and I'm worried about him."

"Let me check with Mark to see if he's there."

I pulled out my communicator and asked Mark if Adam Schiff had checked in. He told me he had not heard a peep out of Adam, since the search began.

"Fuck, I forgot all about him." I spoke into my communicator again, and told Gordon, Gray, Jack, and Dycke to meet me by the main entrance to the ship, on the double. We have trouble.

Laura said, "I'm coming with you, and don't you dare argue with me."

"Okay you can come."

Laura turned and yelled, "George, Adam's missing."

He replied, "You are getting married today, if I have to tear that ship apart."

As I was moving towards the ship, I crossed pass with Stephano.

"Stephano juggle the speeches. We have one man missing. He was searching for the bomb. Put me last or cut me out, but we have to find him before we take off."

"Do what you have to do Even, I'll take care of everything else."

We met at the entrance to the ship and I advised everyone of Adam's predicament. There were five entrances into the ship's bowels, and it would be up to us to find where Adam was, access his situation, and get him out of there.

"When you enter your area, go to your right, it will be the easiest way for each of us to cover the entire ship. He will be easy to spot, because he's wearing his blue flight suit. With the five of us it should not take us more than an hour to complete this task. When you get to the next exit/ entrance, call in for instructions. Let's go."

Laura said, "Doctor Thyme, without being insulting, you've put on a little weight around your middle. You will not be able to fit between the pipes. I've been in there with Adam, so I know what I'm talking about."

Gray said, "Okay, I'm going to get Teddy to see if she can tell us where Adam is. You are right Laura. I am fat, but in a year I won't be."

"Here is the schematic of the openings into the plumbing system. I'll take number one. Gordon you have number two. Laura you have number three, Dick you have number four, and George you have number five. Jack you stay in the center of the engineering deck on the outside chance Adam has found the bomb, and can't move because of it. You will take the shortest route to get to him, and figure out a way to remove the bomb without setting it off."

"You're not doing this because I'm 78 years old, are you?"

"No I'm not. I'm doing it because you're the only one knows how to disarm a bomb."

"In that case, I accept."

Laura said, "Gentleman, I have one word of advice for you before you go in, watch your heads. Adam was forever hitting his head on the pipes above him, and they hurt."

"Thank you Laura, it's a good piece of advice with everything else that's going on today, try not to get hurt."

As each of them crawled through the warren of pipes, they called out for Adam, but they did not get a reply. Their voices bounced off the walls, and piping. Even if Adam replied there would be no way to know from which direction he called, or how far away he was.

It was very slow going, and each of them would be bruised by the end of the search.

After every few meters of progress, Laura would scream, "Adam, if you don't answer me, I'm going to break your fucking neck."

An hour had passed, and still no Adam. As she crawled along the piping, one of the valves read, "Low Pressure Valve." She smiled, because this was the beginning of his lecture on how to get the waste out of the spacecraft. She continued crawling along and found the 'Waste Valve' that he had to open, using the low pressure valve to force the waste into the plastic bag, heat seal the bag, close the valve, and hurry back to turn off the low pressure valve before the line exploded. She remembered it all, and decided to look for the torpedo tube that forced the waste out of the ship and into space.

She remembered Adam saying that the bag went one way and the tube was the other. The tube had to be on the exterior wall of the ship so that's where she looked. Moments later she screamed into her communicator, "I found him. Colonel the easiest way to get here is to come from the entrance four and moved to your left. The asshole is holding the bomb."

"It's nice seeing you too Laura, have you had a nice day?"

"You idiot, you were told not to touch anything."

"I didn't touch it. I crawled underneath it to see if it was booby-trapped, and the stupid thing fell into my hands. I haven't moved for over an hour, and what does my fiancé do when she finds me; she calls me an asshole."

"What am I supposed to call you, a hero?"

"No how about someone who was doing his job properly, and waited for help to arrive. I wanted to make sure that my wife and I were safe when we went into space. I didn't want this to ruin our marriage. I didn't want the bastard's that are trying to blow up this wonderful machine to win. I want them to eat their hearts out as we prove to them that Doctor Luck and all the fine people that worked on this vessel were right and they were wrong."

I told you I would never let you down. I told you I was going to make you proud of me. I hope this is a good start, and I want you to know there's more to come."

"If you don't shut up Adam I'm going to cry, and that's not allowed."

"Who said so?"

"I did."

"Change your rules, and become human like the rest of us. We cry at the drop of a hat."

"Get out of my way Laura, and let me see what we're working with."

"How did it get in that position Adam?"

"I checked out the tube and saw it attached to the top. I crawled in on my back to see if it was booby-trapped, but it was not. Suddenly, it just dropped, and I caught it, the way you see it now. I have not moved my hands or arms in over an hour, and they are cramping badly."

"You can move your hands and placed the box on your chest. It is probably a barometric device that is designed to go off as we pass through a particular altitude. It would be of little use to anyone to have it go off while we are on the ground."

Adam tried, but it was impossible.

"I can't move my arms, they're locked."

George and Gordon join them to see if they could be of any assistance.

Jack said, "Slide Adam out of the tube, until I can relieve him of the explosive device. Laura work on his arms until he gets circulation back, and is able to move them. Did anyone else see anything unusual while they were searching?"

Each of us gave a no for an answer.

"Good, we will still x-ray the urns to be certain we are in the clear, and then we will take off at 5 o'clock as planned."

"Lucius can you hear me?"

"I'm here Jack, what's new?"

"Someone sent us a very special delivery. However, I think you might like to return it personally."

"You just made my week, and possibly the end of my year. I'll meet you at the hangar."

"I'll be there in 20."

Jack pried the package loose from Adams hands, tucked it under his arm and began his trek out of the ship. Joseph Oyster was addressing the crowd and telling them about Good Luck 2. Jack caught William's eye, showed him the package, and nodded his head.

William smiled, nodded, and returned to listen to the speech.

As soon as Jack was in the secure area of the hangar, he took out his tools and began testing the package. His Fluoroscope showed that it was indeed a barometric device which was set to go off at 14,000 feet.

Using liquid nitrogen, he froze the assembly opened the package, and disarmed it.

Jack was packing his tools, when Lucius joined him.

"I missed all the fun Jack?"

"This device was so simple, a baby could've taken care of it. It was the location they put it in that was exquisite. Someone with knowledge of the spacecraft told them about that weak point. There is just enough C4 here to cause a crack in the outer hull that would expand as they continue to gain altitude. By 25 or 30,000 feet the hull would've exploded and the ship would've disintegrated. Look for the inside man, and he will tell you who paid him to do it."

"You're taking all the fun out of my job, Jack. I don't have any detective work to do."

"Remember Lucius, you helped me get on board that spacecraft, I really wanted to get higher than 24,000 feet before my life ended."

"I'll take care of it Jack. While you're goofing off up there, I'll be taking care of business down here. That is a promise my friend, even though your dead, that's a promise."

"Do you think you could drop my daughter a line and see how she's doing? Remind her that I didn't want her sitting at home with cats."

"I'll do it Jack. She will have the letter by New Year's Eve."

"Thanks Lucius, I still am going to miss your phone calls."

**********************

"How are you doing Adam? Are you getting any feeling in your fingertips yet?"

"I don't know, lean closer so I can touch your flight suit."

Laura must have missed the devil in my eye as she leaned closer to me. As soon as she was the correct distance, I reached up and grabbed her nipple, and squeezed tight.

She smacked my hand away.

"You pervert I should've known better."

"Why, I touched your flight suit."

"Yes, but my breast was underneath it."

"I didn't put any caveat on where I was going to touch your flight suit, did I?"

"Have you been reading the dictionary?"

"Yes, I'm trying to improve my vocabulary."

"May I ask why?"

"Yes you can."

"Well, I'm waiting."

"What are you waiting for?"

"I am waiting for you to tell me why you are trying to improve your vocabulary."

"Oh, you should have said that in the first place."

"I thought I did."

"No you didn't. You said, 'May I ask why?' I replied, 'Yes you may.' After that you never asked me why I was trying to improve my vocabulary."

"I am getting very close to explaining to you why I'm going to break your neck Adam."

"Is it a long explanation, or a short explanation, because I would really like to know?"

George said, "That's enough you two, it's time to get married."

"I want you to send me a picture of you in a suit George."

"Somehow I knew you were going to say that. Here, take this with you for luck."

He handed her a data stick, and she looked at him confused.

"What's this?"

"You are the computer expert, you tell me."

"Married, you, me, priest. Let's go please."

*****************

Their timing couldn't have been better. Dycke Schneider just finished his speech as they exited the spacecraft. Stephano immediately called them up to the Dias, along with their parents, siblings, and the priest, who would consecrate their marriage. The ceremony was scheduled to take 12 minutes, and it took 20 minutes because of the tears that flowed from the bride's eyes, while she took her vows. Adam went through his like a hot knife through butter. He looked into Laura's eyes, and told her everything that was in his heart. The effect was the same, Laura cried more. It took Adam a long time to put the ring on her finger because Laura was shaking so badly. At long last it was it was on, and everyone applauded. When he kissed her at the end of the ceremony he said to her that they were wed for life, and not one day shorter. Laura started crying again.

As everyone kissed the new couple and wish them well, the last person to kiss Laura was George.

"I am finally out of a job, and I could not be happier. You picked a wonderful man, he will keep you happy if you let him. Let yourself be happy also, because you deserve it."

"If you think you're rid of me, wait until Monday. You better have a suit on, or you are going to be in big trouble."

"Watch the data stick, and you will realize I am not trouble."

**************************

The Honor Guard formed to the right of the hangar, and on cue, began marching towards the spacecraft. Two drummers led the way, as two captains carry the urns with the remains of President and Mrs. Clark Atwater. Behind them were 10 more members of the honor guard bearing arms.

They were met 50 feet in front of the spacecraft by General Dan Morgan, and Colonel Lucius Allen, in full uniform and Colonel Jack Daniels in his blue flight suit. Each of them wore white gloves.

Everyone was standing as the transfer was made, and a 21 gun salute was sounded. As the honor guard retreated, General Morgan turned and led the Colonel's around the spacecraft, not into it. The people wondered what was going on, but the next speaker was at the platform and the festivities continued.

Colonel Daniels was ready with the x-ray machine along with the processor to see what was inside these urns. He took pictures from three angles, and put them in the developer. Moments later he had his answer. Inside each urn where the ashes of the loving couple. They all breathe a sigh of relief. The ashes were brought up the side entrance which was then sealed.

*************************

Stephano saw Jennifer and I are leaving the spacecraft

Stephano Valentino announced to one and all, "Ladies and gentlemen, Doctor Even Luck."

I received many standing ovation during my career, but this one was special. I acknowledged their approbations, and asked them to return to their seats because I had some announcements I had to make before I could address them.

"All flight crews to your stations for preflight."

"All engineering crews to your stations."

"All personnel on board for initial headcount."

"Nuclear engine 5%, check for radiation leaks."

My crews started to move towards the spacecraft with great excitement, and big smiles on their faces. As they reached the top of the ramp, they turned and waved goodbye to their loved ones.

Ladies and gentlemen, I stand before you today as a scientist and engineer. I am not the magician that put this magnificent machine together. That would be Dycke Schneider, and Schneider industries. I am not the woman who invented the way to use negative and positive magnetism to push and pull this magnificent machine away from the earth and towards other planets at the same time at speeds unheard of by any government on this planet. That would be my daughter, Delicious Luck Thyme. I am not the young man who invented the nuclear fusion power plant, when he was 15 years old, and continues to amaze us all with his talents. That would be my son Gordon Oliver Stars Luck. I am not the man who left NASA, after working for years on the Orion project, and is in him responsible for 27 patents. That would be my son, Grayson Thyme. I didn't build the nuclear engine, or the sarcophagus it's held in, that was done by Babcock and Wilcox. I didn't make the tiny implants for the communications devices that are all over the ship, and all the handheld communications devices we use that keeps our ship as light as we are. Those were made by Mezner Industries. However, none of these things could have been done without our financiers, all 20 of them. Happily I can say, I am one of them. However, there one of our investors that the 19 others have seen fit to honor today, because he has outshone us all. He has worked tirelessly, since the inception of this project to make sure it was a success, and it has become a success far beyond anyone's imagination. William Zabo is a magician. By force of will alone, he makes tides turn, the sun move west to east, and the winds change. I have watched him do it time and time again. Nothing is impossible for this man. It is not a word in his vocabulary. It is just a job he has to work harder on to accomplish, and a little later today you will see that accomplishment soar into the heavens. Unlike governments, who stifle creativity, William allowed 250 phenomenal scientists to work towards an end, without supervision. There it is behind me. For more than seven years, the scientists, engineers, fabricators, and men/women on the assembly lines worked tirelessly towards one goal, to make that spaceship, and we have done it. Accidentally, while we were trying to build this wonderful spacecraft, our 250 scientists have received more than 900 scientific patents' that will make this world a better place to live in.