8 comments/ 26000 views/ 43 favorites A Satyr's Mate Ch. 07-08 By: D_Lynn CHAPTER SEVEN Breeding I spotted the change in his expression. It was as if his entire face morphed at once into an animal that I no longer recognized as my caring, patient Dolphus. "Ashira..." He growled my name as his fist closed around my hair. Warning bells chimed in my brain and I instinctively reacted by trying to break free of his grasp. "No, please..." I turned away from him to claw at the ground, but it was a useless effort, and the exact wrong thing to do, for I had put myself in the position that he sought. "Please, Dolphus..." My pleas were ignored. Dolphus was focused on one thing only. My scent. It was as he'd described to me numerous times. He would not be gentle. And he wouldn't stop until I was impregnated or the season had passed. I knew it was foolish to fight it, to fight him, but my instincts took over. With my face shoved firmly into the ground, I couldn't look at him to remind myself that this was Dolphus and not some wild beast. His growls, his violent handling of me, even the scent he threw off was different, somehow. My mind whirled in confusion, dancing between fear and blind anger. Then he was on top of me. His legs parting my thighs so that he could more easily gain entrance. I made it difficult for him by squirming this way and that, but in the end, I knew I would lose. He was stronger than me and motivated by a force that I scarcely understood. In one swift motion, he speared me with his monstrous cock. All of our previous encounters had felt nothing like this. It was as if I were being split in two. I shrieked, the sound muffled by the ground, and this just seemed to spur him on even more. He didn't wait for my insides to accommodate his massive girth before beginning his relentless, brutal pounding. It was raw and so painful at first that tears flooded my cheeks. His pace quickened to a blistering speed and I felt myself beginning to lose consciousness from it. He tilted my head so that my neck was exposed and bent over me to take my flesh between his teeth, never once interrupting his breakneck rhythm. My fingers released their grip on the ground and all the fight in me subsided at once. Without realizing the meaning behind my instinctual response to him, I was submitting to his will. I was accepting him as a mate. My insides coiled in an instant and exploded in climax around his cock. It was so sudden, I had not prepared for it. I gasped for air, pushing my backside against his pummeling pelvis to deepen the contact still. Dolphus groaned his approval and released the death grip he'd had on my neck and hair to allow me better purchase to push against him. We worked together in a frenzied state, bringing my second climax, an even stronger one, crashing down upon me. Seconds later, Dolphus reached his apex and joined me, releasing a flood of searing hot semen deep into my womb. Unlike our previous times, his ejaculation went on for several long seconds, releasing much more fluid. I was amazed by the volume. It flooded my insides, the excess flowing down my inner thighs to soak the ground beneath us. When at last the flood slowed to a trickle, I waited for him to retreat. I began to move away but he pulled my hips firmly against his pelvis. His cock still stiff inside me, he nuzzled my ear. It was the first sign of affection he'd shown since he first began his assault. "We are not finished." I didn't expect the breeding to end, but I assumed that he would need time to recover before going again. I was wrong. He only waited to catch his breath before resuming his pumping. I hissed from the sting. Our momentary break and my descent from climax brought my awareness back to my sore channel. How was I going to endure the season if only one time made me hurt this much? But just a few dozen strokes later, I was climbing to another climax, the pain long forgotten in favor of the delicious quickening of my core. I was not a satyress in heat, but I was a Baltian woman. Lustful by nature. With a hunger for sex that bordered on obsession. Only a Baltian man would understand my lascivious behavior and be capable of slaking my lust. Or a satyr who happened to be three-quarters Baltian. We rutted there on that hard ground until the sun was low in the sky and the chill of the approaching night made my body tremble uncontrollably. Being severely weakened by the physical exertion and numerous releases, I struggled to walk on my own, leaning on Dolphus for assistance as we made our way toward the den. It was a marvel to me that Dolphus was able to manage us both. His energy and stamina was enviable. Once in the den, we both drank. I was barely able to shove a handful of pine nuts into my mouth before Dolphus mounted me again. Each time he re-entered me, the ache returned until it was once again replaced with pleasure. Over and over again, throughout the night and wee hours of the morning. Dolphus didn't eat, and barely paused to drink water and urinate. I was the sole object of his attention. It was tiring. My muscles ached, the wounds from our initial struggle constantly being reopened from scraping against the floor, the bed, the ground outside, the stone lip of the watering hole, whatever surface happened to be beneath us when he took me. I was bleeding and bruised and weary, but didn't care about any of it. For the first time in my life, I was truly happy. Blissed-out, in fact. It was like I had discovered this perfect drug to which I was totally addicted. I can describe it in no other terms because nothing compared to it. I had never expected to love mating season. It was my obligation to Dolphus, my job, my single duty as his slave. I was expected to comply, not required to love it or even like it. But somehow I did. Just as quickly as it started, it was over. I woke up in bed, having gotten several hours of uninterrupted sleep to find Dolphus attacking the food stores like a ravenous beast. All propriety aside, he was shoving handfuls of nuts, leaves, and vegetables into his mouth, barely even noticing that I was sitting up in bed gaping at him. "Have I lost you to food?" Dolphus motioned for me to join him. He managed a single word with a full mouth. "Eat." I ambled toward him, coaxing my sore muscles to work. My unruly hair shed pine needles and dead reeds of grass over the ground as I walked. I was thankful for having no reflection around to spy just how dreadful I appeared. A cursory glance down my torso and over my limbs revealed more bruises, scrapes and dirt than I had ever seen on my body, and I could tell from the debris falling from my mane that my hair must've been the largest rat's nest in the world. I was a mess. Dolphus didn't seem to notice or mind, however. He admired me as I approached, even as he shoved fistfuls of food into his mouth. But his member was no longer erect and swollen, indicating that his admiration was not to be followed-up with the rough hammering I'd grown so fond of receiving. Instead he pulled me to sitting between his splayed thighs so that my back rested against his chest, and then proceeded to feed me. "I can feed myself, you may remember." "I remember that you eat like a bird." "I do not. I just get tired of the same thing." "Tomorrow I will go find you some fresh fruit. Would you like that, my sweet?" I smiled as I craned my neck around to check his expression. His sudden affectionate demeanor was almost jarring after the previous activity. "You know I would. I love fruit." "Good. Then I shall bring back as much as I can carry. Several times per week until you are tired of it." "I'll get fat that way." "Yes. That is the plan." "I don't want to be fat. It'll make me slow and clumsy." "You are already slow and clumsy." I elbowed his ribs. "That's not a nice thing to say." "But it is the truth. And you will only get more so as your belly grows." "You're not presenting a very strong case for me to increase my food intake with all that flattery." "Then perhaps you will do it for the lambkin." "The...? What are you saying? Am I ... Am I pregnant?" Dolphus chuckled. "Yes, little one. Why else would I be sitting here eating rather than mating?" "I ... I don't know. Are you sure?" "Yes. Quite sure. The change in your scent is altogether dramatic." "Dolphus..." Tears welled in my eyes as I reached around to hug his neck with trembling hands. "You are not upset by this news?" I released his neck to run my hands over my belly. It was frightening not knowing how it was going to turn out for me, but I wasn't upset. I shook my head. "You are such a brave little one." I chuckled at his pet name for me. "I'm not going to be little for long." Pushing aside the ramifications of that statement, I suppressed my worry for the moment so that I could enjoy our quiet celebration together. *** My belly grew quickly over the following weeks and months. Our lambkin kept me warm throughout the harsh winter season and I thanked Osmos many times for that small miracle. Without the added warmth, I was sure that I would've frozen to death. Three satyresses and myself were to bear offspring in the early spring months. Zira and Shala were among the satyresses, the third being a lower ranking female who'd happened to get caught delivering a message to Aeron when the scent reached him. If we'd been in Sibiu, it would've been quite the scandal, but there were different rules at play here. Aeron, being the leader, had rights to any female in the flock. While his preferred mate was Zira, he often produced multiple lambkin in a single season by different satyresses. It was an honor to carry his offspring and no satyress would refuse him. That didn't imply that he exercised that privilege, however, He'd never bred with Shala, for instance, even though she was second satyress in ranking. There were many rumors for why this was so, but the most widely believed was simply because he didn't like her. I found it to be a perfectly reasonable explanation, especially since I agreed with his taste, but others felt a certain imbalance because of it. It was why Shala had been so adamant about mating with Dolphus. And until we successfully birthed our lambkin, she would hold out hope for it to happen. After all, the chances of my surviving the delivery were not good. We did have a new reason to hope, though. In those early days of pregnancy, when Dolphus was gathering every variety of succulent fruit he could find in order to fatten me up, he ran into a band of Baltians who'd settled at the base of Saia Heights, just outside the city limits of Sibiu. It was two families traveling together. With them was a Baltian midwife named Valame. They agreed to remain at the base of the mountain range until the spring, helping with my induction of labor and whatever followed. Valame was cautiously optimistic about my chances of survival after discussing the plan with Dolphus. They measured my belly weekly and plotted points on a graph to try and determine when to induce labor. It was all very tedious and scientific, but it was also a lot of guesswork. The truth was, no one had tried this before and so no one could predict what was going to happen. I'd cycled through so many emotions about it, my head spun. From being in complete denial that any real danger existed, to anger over the unfairness of it. I silently bargained with Osmos to allow me this one gift in exchange for a lifetime of asking for nothing else. It was all I'd come to care about, with the possible exception of Dolphus. I could've never predicted how attached I'd become to the lambkin growing inside me. I talked to her all the time, sometimes in a not-so-friendly voice, as she packed a mean kick. We didn't really know the sex, but I was convinced it was female. Dolphus told me that odds were in favor of a male, but we'd defied all odds thus far, so I knew it had to be a girl. Around mid December, Valame and Dolphus agreed that the time was upon us. We planned the induction for the following week. "I have a surprise for you, little one. Do you think you can make it just partway to Valame's homestead?" Making the trip down to the base was becoming difficult, I often lost my balance with the added weight in front of me. "How far?" "Just to the landing halfway down, where we often take a break." "Yeah. I can do that. When?" "We are meeting Valame there in an hour." "Is everything alright?" "Yes, my sweet. All is well. We are still on schedule for next week. Now, put on your smock so we can get moving." Valame had sewn a rather large, loose-fitting smock to wear on our visits. It made the Baltian women uncomfortable for me to show up naked. I didn't like wearing it much and often had it over my head and wadded in my hand long before we reached our den, but out of respect for Valame, I always wore it when I visited. It was sort of amusing how I'd done a complete turnaround with regard to my attitude on clothing. We arrived at the landing before Valame. I was still struggling to catch my breath when I heard her voice wafting up the trail. She was not alone, directing the person with her on where to step. When they got close, Dolphus climbed down the path to greet them. No sooner his green eyes came into view, I immediately recognized who it was. Dolphus had contacted my father and arranged for him to meet us. His eyes grew wide as my enormous belly came into his view. I couldn't tell if his expression was one of shock or excitement. For several long minutes, he simply gawked at me. "You are big as a house, Shi." I blinked away the tears at hearing his term of endearment for me since childhood. It was the only part of my name that I could pronounce when I was a toddler and it sort of just stuck. "Are you well?" I nodded as I wiped my cheeks. Dolphus came to stand by my side, a look of amusement on his face, no doubt from hearing my nickname. I squeezed Dolphus' hand. It was my silent way of thanking him for bringing my father to me. "I am in good hands. Are you okay, Father?" He nodded. "Much better now that I know you are being cared for. I've been worried sick. I wasn't sure..." I shook my head to let him know he didn't have to continue. None of us had known much about satyrs, so naturally he'd worried. Valame produced a picnic basket containing a delightful assortment of processed foods that I hadn't eaten in a long time. I gorged myself on them. Dolphus refrained from eating, as none of it was appealing to him, but I got the sense that he wasn't there for the food. He'd arranged the meeting for me. So that I could see my father, and my father could see me. Maybe for the last time. We spent the next couple of hours catching up on affairs. My father had given up on gambling, but not much else had changed. I realized that while I had missed my father, I could do without the rest of Sibiu. There was nothing for me there and I was glad to be free from it. Glad to be with my flock, with Dolphus, with my lambkin. I had a family now. A life. I was vague with the details of my induction. I didn't want my father to know the complications. He sized me up against Dolphus many times and I was sure he suspected something, but he never said anything. At any rate, I was afraid if we told him what we were planning, he'd insist on being there and I couldn't let that happen. If things didn't go well, it would resurface old memories of my mother for him. When we got back to the den, I made Dolphus promise that he wouldn't tell my father anything. He never needed to know that I died giving birth, if that's what was to come. Five days before we were planning to go to Valame's, a storm moved over the mountains blanketing us with six inches of fresh snow. It wasn't enough to change our plans, but we should've recognized it for what it was. It was a warning. The next night, another storm added eight inches to it, and two days later, the eve of our scheduled departure, a storm socked us in with two feet of snow. Temperatures dropped to frigid and conditions became treacherous, even for satyrs. It would've been foolish for me to try and make it down, even with Dolphus' help, and impossible for Valame to navigate upward with no satyr to assist her. We talked about going forward with the plan without Valame's help, but neither of us felt confident that one inexperienced Baltian woman and a satyr could possibly do this without any help at all. Even the flock would have difficulty getting to us in the event that things went terribly wrong. So we waited. Another two weeks passed before the temperatures rose enough to melt the snow, and then it took several days for the trails to dry enough for traveling. We didn't reach Valame's until January 2nd. ******** CHAPTER EIGHT A New Beginning A mere forty minutes after ingesting the root, my contractions began. They were intense from the beginning, allowing me no time at all to adjust to the discomfort. Both Valame and Dolphus had witnessed the birthing process before, so they knew what to expect. I, however, knew nothing. It didn't matter, though. Nothing they could've said would ever have prepared me for the intense pain. There was no possible way to describe it. Every inch of me from my heart to my thighs was screaming in agony with every contraction, and there was no escape from it. For hours my body tried to move the lambkin, but it hardly dropped an inch. I was growing weak from the pain. And blood seemed to be trickling down at a steady enough rate to cause concern. Valame tried to hide it, but I could see it across her pale face that things were not going to end well. Dolphus, too, was unusually quiet. My vision was growing dim with each contraction and I drifted in and out of consciousness. I could no longer focus on what Valame and Dolphus were saying to one another in hushed tones. I knew I had mere minutes to say my peace before blacking out for good. There was only one thing I had to say. "Save our cosset." *** Sleet pelted the coverlets I'd made for the holes in the ceiling. The noise reminded me of something in my childhood, but I was having trouble putting my finger on exactly what it was. Sandpaper. Something having to do with my father's wood carving hobby. As I tried to clear my mind, I heard breathing nearby. My eyes fluttered open, expecting to see my father sitting in the corner, sanding the leg of an old chair. It was something he often did before he'd taken up gambling. I was confused when I saw Dolphus' face, instead. "Dolphus?" In an instant he was at my side, brushing my hair from my face. "I'm here, little one." I glanced around the room. I was highly confused on where here was. I wasn't expecting it to be our home. I should be dead. "Why am I here?" "This is your home, Ashira." Nothing was making sense to me. It was all wrong. "I don't understand." Dolphus lifted his head to call over his shoulder. "Valame." Valame's face came into my view. She reached up to feel my forehead, then pressed her fingers against the pulse in my neck. "Welcome back." "She doesn't seem to know where she is." "Be patient. She's been out for some time." Something kept niggling at me. There was something I needed to know, something missing. I was growing more tense as I couldn't seem to recall what it was. "Shhhhh...rest now, Ashira. You mustn't worry about anything. We'll take care of you." Valame's voice was how I imagined my mother's voice to sound. So soothing. So perfect. I closed my eyes. It made sense now. I was with her again. We were in ... my bedroom? I opened my eyes and all at once it occurred to me. My hands slid down my flat belly. I was no longer pregnant. "My cosset." A Satyr's Mate Ch. 07-08 Valame and Dolphus shared a look, silently communicating something between them. A second later, Dolphus left the room. "Where is she?" Valame shook her head. "It was a he." "He? Was a he?" "He didn't make it, Ashira." It felt like someone had stabbed me in the chest. "No...Not my sweet baby cosset." I didn't even try to hold back the sobs as they wracked my body. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. I was the one who was supposed to die, not my lambkin. It wasn't fair. Not to me, but most especially not to Dolphus. He wanted this cosset more than I did. When the crying finally subsided and I'd wiped the snot and tears from my face, I realized why Dolphus had left the room. He was mourning in his own way. Away from the one who'd lived in place of his beloved lambkin son. "Oh, poor Dolphus. He must hate me for living when his son did not." Valame shook her head. "Don't say that, Ashira. He doesn't feel that way at all." "You don't know him, Valame. He wanted this kid more than anything in the world." "Not more than anything." I watched silently on as Valame seemed to be struggling with what to do next. "I am hesitant to say this to you now but you should know. Dolphus saved your life, Ashira." "Why did he do that? I told him to save our cosset." "I know. He would have if it would've been possible. You should be happy to be alive, Ashira. You lost much blood and we weren't sure you'd make it." "Oh, Dolphus. He must be heartbroken." "He was sad, yes. But it was his choice." "What do you mean?" "I'll tell you the details later. For now you must rest. You've been through so much." "Will I be able to ...?" I couldn't seem to finish the question. "Yes, Ashira. I think so. But ... You should discuss that with Dolphus later. Sleep now." The news of my lost lambkin made sleep come faster. It was my best escape from the reality I thought too dreadful to believe. The next time I woke, it was because I was uncomfortable. "Valame!" Both Valame and Dolphus approached my bed. "What is it?" "My breasts." Dolphus peeled down the covers to unveil a chest I didn't recognize. Overnight, my breasts had increased in size by a factor of two, it appeared. "They hurt. What is happening?" Valame sighed. "This is your body's normal reaction. You'd be producing milk right now to feed the baby. Or the lambkin, in your case." I ran my fingers lightly over the tight skin. "What can I do? This is very uncomfortable." "It will pass in time." I groaned in disappointment. Dolphus immediately wrapped his arms around my shoulders to comfort me. "There must be something. She can't rest if she is in pain." "Expressing milk from her breasts will only encourage her body to produce more. It is how the mammalian gland operates. It is stimulated by suckling." "How do you stop it, then?" "You leave it alone and suffer through the discomfort. That's what we normally do. I see your point in this case, though. Ashira needs her rest and so comfort is more important right now. I do have a device in my domicile that aids in expressing milk from the breast. I've used it before to help a new mother to get started." "I can go there and retrieve it." Valame placed her hand on Dolphus' arm. "It is in one of my trunks, but I'm not sure which one. I wouldn't know where to direct you. And since you've never seen such a device, you won't know what you're looking for, either. "I'm sorry, Ashira. I wasn't prepared for this to happen." "It's not your fault." I let go a sigh as my head sunk back down onto the bed. I felt so weak and helpless. And the more Dolphus and Valame had to cater to my every whim, the more guilty I felt. I just wanted to crawl into a hole and go to sleep forever. I'd thought I might actually be capable of doing that until the incessant throbbing in my breasts began. Now all I could do was lay there and be miserable as I drifted in and out of sleep. Each time I awoke, I was faced with the nightmare all over again. It would never stop, I realized. I'd lost my child, our cosset kid, our lambkin. I couldn't escape from the pain of that except in sleep, and now I didn't even have that. In the quiet dark of the night I lay there awake. Dolphus' even breathing was all I could hear. He'd been at my side every day since the tragedy, although I hardly understood why. Clearly I was not going to be able to give him what he wanted. I'd failed him. He deserved so much more. He deserved a mate who wasn't a complete failure at mating. "Are you in pain, Shi?" I sighed at his use of my childhood nickname. "A little. I didn't mean to wake you." Dolphus tentatively wrapped his arm around my torso, pressing his chest to my back. His warmth was soothing but not enough to take away the throbbing ache. "Is this hurting you?" I shook my head. "Your warmth feels good." Dolphus draped his enormous, furry thigh over my hip as his arms closed around me. It was how we slept before my belly grew too big to allow it. He buried his face in my hair, nuzzling a path toward my ear. I felt the wetness trickling down my cheeks before I even realized I was crying. A moment later, Dolphus felt it on his arm. He lifted his head in alarm. "What is wrong?" I shook my head. Nothing. Everything. I was so confused. Dolphus rolled me onto my back to see my face. It was too dark to make out anything but his green eyes. My damn emotions were only making things worse. Keeping him up at night. Worrying him when he should be sleeping so he could attend to flock business. He lowered his gaze to my engorged breasts. His fingertips lightly traced a circle around my nipple before he lowered his mouth to it. I gasped at the wet warmth of his mouth and then quickly whispered, "No, Dolphus." He ignored my plea and instead clamped down around my breast with his lips as he drew my nipple into his mouth. I gasped in pain, about to push him away when I felt a rush of relief. The pressure subsided enough for the throbbing to dull in that breast. It was both immediate and euphoric. My entire body sunk into the covers with relief. After a few moments, he switched to the other breast and the experience was the same. Instant relief to the point of complete rapture. Dolphus pulled away from my breast to look up at me. "Is that enough?" I cupped his face in my palms and pulled it toward mine for a kiss. "Thank you." "I should have done that the first day. I know not why it didn't occur to me." "Was it awful?" Dolphus pulled away in shock. "Non, little one. Your milk is sweet and warm. It is a lovely treat. I stopped because we must not trick your body into believing you are nursing, or the pressure you feel will persist." I nodded and sighed, already feeling sleepy from the relief. "Sleep, little one." I don't remember if I even wished him goodnight. *** Days passed, and soon I was able to walk around on my own. Valame stayed on so Dolphus could spend more time with the flock council. They were planning a training program to commence in the spring months following the birth of all the lambkin. Some believed that they should take a more active role in defending their flock. It was still under debate just what strategy they'd adopt, but it was unanimously decided that they needed to begin training their adolescent males to fight. If for no other reason than to defend themselves. Dolphus kept a daily regimen of feeding on my breast milk, much to Valame's disapproval. She insisted that it would've been better to have handled it a different way. Her argument fell on Dolphus' deaf ears, though. He'd grown fond of suckling my breasts and showed no signs of stopping. He wasn't even the tiniest bit embarrassed by how it affected him in other ways, either. He'd come to like it so much, his member grew stiff whenever my nipples leaked. I would've been mortified if I cared at all. That was the problem. I didn't seem to care about anything. All the colors of my world had faded to gray and I barely managed to get out of bed. It wasn't that I was physically incapable anymore, it was that I felt no desire to do so. Often, after Dolphus finished his morning feast and left, I would crawl back into bed and quietly weep. For hours. Sometimes all the way up until his return. It caused Valame much distress to see me doing that, so I made a concerted effort to keep it to a minimum. But soon she would leave and I knew that I would have no reason to get out of bed. Until I was a complete burden on Dolphus. "Take me with you when you go, Valame." Valame was shocked by my request. She shook her head. "I can't do that. Think of how it would devastate Dolphus, Ashira." "I will only become burdensome to him once you leave. He needs to be free to ..." I couldn't finish the sentence before breaking down into tears again. I could hardly stand the thought of him with another mate. "He doesn't want anyone else." I sucked back the tears so I could continue with my plea. "He will. When mating season arrives." "Have you spoken with him about this?" I shook my head. I didn't have the heart to bring it up. "He may not want to have any more." "Of course he wants offspring. It's in his nature to reproduce." "Dolphus isn't like other satyrs. He's more human. More driven by emotion than you think. He loves you, Ashira." "He's never said it. And now...after what happened..." "Just because he hasn't said the word, doesn't mean he doesn't feel it. Search your heart. You know it to be true." "Even if he does, I can't be his mate. If we can't successfully breed, we can only just be this. Dolphus is strong and smart. The flock needs him to reproduce. And if he can't...If he refuses to breed, he'll lose his status in the flock." "Maybe he doesn't care about that as much as you believe." Valame heaved a sigh. "It's time I told you something." Her distress was apparent. Whatever she had to say, it was causing her much anguish. I waited for her to continue. "After you lost consciousness in delivery, it was evident that we'd have to take drastic measures in order for one of you to live. That meant ..." Valame paused, checking my expression before continuing. "That meant either ripping you apart from the inside to free the lambkin, or ... or ..." "Or, what?" Valame shook her head. "I knew what you would choose, and we both heard your last words before losing consciousness, but Dolphus ... there was no hesitation. He chose to take the lambkin's life to save yours." The horror of it struck me with a powerful blow. "How?" Before Valame could answer, we heard Dolphus at the front entrance. "Valame!" For a second, I thought he'd overheard our conversation with his damn, supersonic, satyr hearing. "Come quickly. There is a problem with one of the lambkin." Valame glanced at me briefly and then was gone in a flash, leaving me to mull over what she'd told me. It was horrifying. I could hardly imagine Dolphus taking the life of his own newborn. My own morbid curiosity made me wonder how he'd accomplished it, even as I knew that hearing such a thing would likely turn my stomach. What he must be going through... I plopped down on my bed and cried. This time it wasn't in self pity. I cried for our unborn cosset and I cried for Dolphus. For what seemed like an eternity, I cried. I'd been wallowing in my own misery, never once realizing what it must be doing to Dolphus. The responsibility of it all must've been a terrible weight to bear for him. As the tears slowed to a trickle and I began to regain my senses, I was even more convinced that I needed to leave. Dolphus approached the bed and knelt down beside me. His look of concern split my heart in two. "We've brought a little visitor." I frowned at him as I wiped my cheeks. The last thing I needed or wanted at that moment was company. Just as I was about to tell him so, Valame appeared at his side holding a very small lambkin. She knelt to show him to me. It was a cruel thing to do, I thought. I stared incredulously, first at Dolphus, then at Valame. I tried to move away from them, but Dolphus held me in place. "He needs you, Ashira." I shook my head. He wasn't mine. I wasn't a mother, just a useless burden. "His mother cannot produce milk. He will die without it. Neither Zira, nor Shala have birthed yet. You are the only one." My gaze lowered to the tiny bundle in Valame's arms. He was asleep and looked so frail. Dolphus took him from Valame and held him between us. He barely stirred from being handled, then his little nose began to quiver. On queue, breast milk began to bead at the opening of my nipples and without prompting, the little cosset came alive and latched onto the one closest to his mouth. I looked up at Dolphus in shock. "He knows what to do. It's instinctual." I glanced up at Valame and was met with a warm smile. Then I turned my attention back to my little suckling. For being so small, he was able to draw milk with an amazing force. "He's hungry." "He was starving to death. He was only able to get a very small amount of milk from his mother." "This is Lena's lambkin? Aeron's, as well?" "Yes. That's correct. Aeron is most grateful for your assistance." Dolphus caressed my cheek and then the bulging cheek of the cosset in my arms. For several minutes, we watched the little lambkin noisily suckle and slurp from my breast. Valame directed me on when it was time to switch sides. The cosset fed until he fell asleep, my nipple still between his little lips that were now lined with breast milk. "What do I do now?" Valame grinned at me. "You can leave him there, or put him down on your bed. It's up to you. There is no right or wrong way." "When will he feed again?" "In a few hours, maybe less. He has some catching up to do." I decided to keep him in my arms. I felt a certain fulfillment from holding him next to me. It was precisely what my body and soul had been missing. It filled the void inside that had been threatening to overtake me every waking second. Dolphus lifted my chin, pulling my attention from the sleeping babe in order to kiss my lips. For a moment we locked gazes and I realized that he had once again saved me. There was so much to say to him. About being thankful for everything he had given me, about how much I loved my life. And him. "I must go tell Aeron the news. His bias will keep him from seeing it for himself, but he will be relieved. May I invite Lena to return with me?" I smiled and nodded. "Of course. She's welcome to come and stay as long as she likes." Dolphus smiled and nodded before he stood to leave. Valame watched him go before turning back to me. "I'll be leaving tomorrow. I must get back to my own families." I nodded. "I understand. I can't thank you enough for all you've done for us." "I'm sorry it turned out the way that it did, but we don't always understand Osmos' plan. Perhaps it happened as it should have. Yes?" I gazed down at the bundle in my arms. If my lambkin had lived without me, what would've been his fate? And if we'd both lived, would this precious one in my arms ever gotten enough milk to survive? The turn of events, while generally unpleasant, were not a total loss. I looked up at Valame and smiled. "I will miss you, Valame." It was my way of letting her know that I'd decided to stay. That I was going to be alright, after all. ********