6 comments/ 109950 views/ 42 favorites Losing Control in the Office Ch. 01 By: tmz Thursday, October 9 I haven't kept a journal for around 30 years, but I'm very confused, and I need to write in order to make sense of today's events. Writing a story in my journal about each of my days used to help me a lot when I was in college, and I'm hoping that it will work for me now. I thought it would be good when they promoted me last year to be in charge of Global IT, but boy, was I wrong! All I seem to do is go to boring meetings and deal with stupid corporate bullshit instead of managing software projects. Sometimes I hate this fucking job, but with the economy being what it is, it's going to be a pain in the ass finding something else right now. However, there's one compensation: I have a private office with a door that locks, and I take advantage of that to view my porn each day. Usually, I masturbate in my office. In addition to the sexual pleasure this gives me, it's a good stress reliever and it helps my otherwise difficult days go by. My porn consists of erotic videos, and I carry it with me on an encrypted memory stick on my keychain. Whenever I want to view it, I lock my office door, mount the memory stick, plug in my headphones, and view my videos directly from it. After doing that late this morning, I was in a state of unfulfilled sexual arousal when I went to lunch, because I was interrupted by a phone call before I brought myself to orgasm, and I didn't have time to continue once I ended the call, due to today's busy schedule. I usually eat after the normal lunch hour when the cafeteria isn't too crowded. However, today I had a 1:00 PM meeting and had to go earlier than usual, right during the time when things are busiest. On days like today when I don't eat with my usual lunch companions, I prefer to sit alone and admire the more attractive women who make their way through the cafeteria. Luckily, I managed to grab the only empty two-seater table in the cafeteria. It was near the back, which gave me an excellent vantage point. As I enjoyed both my meal and the view, a woman swept around me from behind and stood across the table from me, tray in hand. "Hello Mr. Martin," she said with a noticeable accent, smiling. "May I sit here?" She was a rather attractive young Latina who looked vaguely familiar to me. She seemed to be in her mid-twenties and was around 5'2" or 5'3", with long dark hair, dark eyes, a tan complexion, and extremely pretty features. She had the body type I love the most: petite with a slim waist, a round but proportionate ass, and small-to-medium-sized well-formed breasts. She must have been someone in my department, because I'm the only manager here who allows my personnel to wear "business casual" attire to work. This is supposed to consist of tastefully non-formal clothes, but this woman was definitely pushing it to the limit, with the ass-hugging pants she was wearing and her tight, button-down top of slightly see-through material that allowed a vague hint of her dark, skimpy bra to show through. Plus, she was standing in a pose that exuded an "I know I'm hot" attitude. I normally don't fraternize with my employees, and especially not with a young, attractive woman, given that corporations these days are so concerned about sexual harassment and abuse-of-authority issues. However, I guess my judgment was impaired by my horniness after my unfulfilled masturbation and by the fact that this woman was so attractive. I thought it would be OK to allow her to sit with me as long as I acted formal, proper, and boss-like. I made a show of looking around the crowded eating area and then said in a voice loud enough for any nearby snoops to hear, "Well, sure. I know how hard it is to find a seat at this hour in the cafeteria." I knew that probably sounded a little bit rude, but I had to behave that way in order to keep my public behavior above reproach. "Thank you," she replied as she seated herself. "I do not know if you remember me, Sir. I started my work here almost three weeks ago. You spoke to us during the orientation. My name is Cristina Rodriguez. I work in the group of Network Operations." She extended her hand graciously. Her English wasn't incorrect, but she spoke like someone who learned it in a foreign language class and who was less familiar with the normal rhythms of everyday speech. There was something about that which I found charming. Furthermore, I liked her formal politeness which seemed to be typical for many of the Hispanic people who work for me, especially those born in other countries. I took her hand in a polite manner and told her that I do recall seeing her there, not mentioning that I hadn't remembered her name. I asked her how she liked working here so far, and she replied with the usual platitudes that a new hire would normally say to the head of their department: that she liked the job and her boss, that the people she worked with were great, etc. I gave polite responses, and then there was a period of silence while we ate. In maintaining my corporate role, I felt it was necessary for me not to lead the conversation with her, lest she think I was coming on to her. I have to be very careful about these things in my position. This was more difficult than usual for me, because I found Ms. Rodriguez to be extremely attractive, and coming on to her is exactly what I would have wanted to do if it wasn't such an inappropriate thing in this situation. Also, I was glad that there was a table between us, so that she couldn't see the erection that was already starting to grow in my pants as I admired her in front of me. I was already horny from my unfulfilled masturbation, and she was augmenting those feelings. After a little while, she spoke again. "Sir, I hope you don't think that I came to this table only because there were not many places to sit. When I saw you here, I wanted to sit with you." This caught me by surprise. I wouldn't have expected a beautiful young woman like her to want to seek out a man who was probably as old as her father. Of course, due to my concerns about corporate propriety, I had to hide my happiness and sexual excitement. "Oh? Really?" I replied, trying very hard to convey a tone of condescending but polite distance. "Yes, Sir," she replied with a smile as she tossed her head to make her hair go back over her shoulder. "I know that you are the boss of the department of IT, and I have a question that I want to ask you." The toss of her head sent sexual desire through me, but the subsequent realization that she was here for a work-related matter immediately killed that feeling. For a moment I felt a twinge of disappointment, because I had been entertaining the thought that she might have actually been interested in me as a man. But I silently reminded myself that I need to be realistic about such things, given how much older I am than she is. But also, I felt slightly relieved, because it now would be easier to maintain the proper corporate decorum given that her interest in talking to me had to do with her job. "Oh, well I hope I can answer your question," I replied kindly and graciously, but still with some distance and formality. "Thank you very much, Sir," she responded with a bright smile and some body language that conveyed gratitude and appreciation. The subtle motion of her body drew my attention to the way that the shape of her lovely breasts strained the buttons of her tightly fitting top. This caused a slight opening between the buttons nearest to her breasts, and I could see a tiny glimpse of her black bra. I found myself trying to imagine how she would look without her blouse and also with bare breasts, but then I caught myself and quickly withdrew my gaze from her chest. Another surge of desire went through me. She was looking me in the eyes the whole time, but thankfully, she didn't react to the momentary shift of my gaze onto her chest. I hoped that meant that she wasn't paying attention to that. She continued, "What I would like to know, Sir, is how do you feel about the way I look in my clothes?" "Excuse me?!" I blurted out, having been taken totally by surprise. This put me into a confused and conflicted state. First of all, this is not a proper subject in a corporate environment, especially between a male supervisor and a much younger female employee. Secondly, I was feeling very excited about how she looked, and it was frustrating to know that I couldn't tell her that. And finally, I was wondering whether this was some sort of come-on, or whether once again my wishful thinking was getting the better of me. As I struggled for an appropriate answer, I just found myself babbling, "Um ... I'm not sure what you want to know ... I mean ... what do I feel? ... is this ..." "Oh, I'm sorry, Sir," she said, cutting off my stammering response. "Excuse me for interrupting you. English is not my native language, and I know that sometimes I am not clear with the words that I say in your language. What I want to ask you is if you approve of how I look in my clothes." This sounded no different in substance from the way she originally said it. "You want to know if I ... if I approve of ... of ... um ..." She smiled again and gave another toss of her head which just served to add some more sexual arousal to the mix of confusing feelings I was experiencing. "I now can see that I am not saying this in a clear manner," she interrupted again. "I will try to explain it in a better way. In my country, the women we always want to be beautiful. Before I came here I used to work in a big company in Colombia, and in that place, we dress very beautifully, and the men there they want us to do that. This is how we are in my country. But when I came here I noticed that the women who work here and in other companies they want to dress in a more plain style. And some of the people they told me that my clothes are not appropriate for this company. But other people they told me that there is no problem with my clothes. I wanted to avoid this problem, and I decided to dress in more of a plain style, and now I am doing that." If this is a "plain" style for her, I thought to myself, I can imagine how hot she looked before she made the change! "But even in my plain clothes," she was continuing, "some people they tell me that it is still not appropriate, but other people they say that that there is no problem. I know that you are the boss of the department of IT, and that you make the policy for how your employees wear the clothes. That is why I ask you how you feel about the way I look in my clothes." She smiled and made another subtle move with her body which aroused me yet again. Her explanation once again killed the idea that she might be coming on to me, but at least I now knew where her question was coming from. "Oh, OK. Thank you for explaining, Ms. Rodriguez. So you're wanting to know about our dress code here." "Yes, now I remember how you say this. 'Dress code'". Even though I am allowed to talk about dress codes, I still had to choose my words very carefully. "OK," I replied. "Well ... um, as I'm sure I mentioned during orientation, our department doesn't have the same dress code as the rest of the company. Because we don't work in Marketing and don't normally deal with clients, I allow you all to wear business casual attire in the office ... as long as you aren't meeting any of the clients, of course. By 'business casual', I'm talking about nice, clean clothes that are tasteful but which aren't overly formal." "Yes, Sir," she replied, giving me what maybe was a sly grin ... or was it? "I remember that you told this to us during the orientation. And when I came to work the next day, I did wear clothes that were not formal. I did not choose any of the dresses or matching outfits that I would wear to my work in Colombia. Instead of that I wore the same kind of casual blouses and skirts or pants that I like to wear when I go out with my friends, or when I go shopping. They are very clean and very nice, but some people they said that those clothes are not appropriate to wear here. This is why I now wear the more plain clothes, but some people they still say it is not appropriate." I found myself fantasizing about her in her earlier attire. Given the comments she was getting, I'm sure those clothes were hot and sexy, and I yearned to see her in those outfits. But of course I had to keep things proper and corporate, and I could never even hint at the fact that I felt that way. "Well, Ms. Rodriguez," I responded, continuing to choose my words carefully and sticking to my 'helpful boss' demeanor, "I tell my managers that they are not to focus on clothes-related issues, but rather, how well a person is doing his or her job. It doesn't matter whether a person is wearing jeans and a tee shirt or something more ... well, stylish. But also, there is another factor, and this has to do with the entire company, not just my department. It turns out that due to various legal issues, the Human Resources department ... um ... uh ..." But then my voice stopped in my throat. Ms. Rodriguez had apparently finished her food, and as I was speaking, she reached over to put her tray on the table next to ours, which the former diners had recently vacated. In doing so, she had to rise up out of her seat and turn to her side, and that gave me a view of her profile down to her upper thighs. As she bent forward to place the tray on the other table, I noticed her slim waist and the way this made her round, well-proportioned ass stick outwards. After she placed her tray, she turned to face me in that position, and she seemed to be aware of my gaze on her body ... or was she? I still couldn't tell how much of this was in my imagination. I would have averted my eyes, but she just smiled and gave her ass a very subtle move in my direction, as if to welcome my appreciative and aroused gaze at her bottom ... assuming I wasn't making all this up in my head, I reminded myself. Only then did she sit back down, and she did so in a way that allowed me to see the motion of her breasts as she slowly lowered herself. Her eyes never left mine as she did so. Although I reminded myself that all this was probably not deliberate, I still felt flabbergasted by the sexual reactions I was having. I had a full erection now. I tried to continue what I was saying, but all I could do was to stammer, "... uh ... and ... so ... um ..." "Is there something that is wrong, Mr. Martin?" she asked, continuing to look into my eyes. It almost seemed like there was a playful seductiveness in her voice. Or was that just curiosity and concern, and was I just projecting again? "Um ... I'm sorry, Ms. Rodriguez. I just noticed ... uh ... the time." I had to lie, of course, as there was no way I could admit how much she was affecting me. "Um ... I have a 1:00 PM meeting, and I suddenly remembered ... um, something I need to discuss there." "I do not want to keep you from your meeting, Sir," she replied, continuing to look at me the same way. Again I wondered about her motives: was she was saying that in playful irony, or was I just imagining that? "Oh ... no ... no ... don't worry, Ms. Rodriguez. I still have time. It was just a ... um, a momentary distraction. I've been very busy lately and I have a lot on my mind. I apologize again. So ... uh, anyway, where was I? ..." She put her arms on the table and leaned towards me. "You were speaking to me about something which concerns the department of Human Resources." My eyes wandered down to her neckline, and I noticed that I could see a tiny bit of the material of her black, low cut bra. I also had a view of the curvature of the upper parts of her breasts. I immediately averted my gaze back to her eyes. She just kept looking at me with that smile, and she kept her open neckline pointed at me, almost as if she's was giving me that view on purpose ... or was she? I forced myself back on subject. "Oh ... yes, thank you. Well, I was saying that ... uh ... well, here in this country women have been ... um ... well, they are working to not to let sex ... um, I mean, um, gender issues prevent them from rising in a company ... or to help them get a rise ... I mean to get a _raise_ when the men in power try to use that as a ... well as a criterion for advancement. I'm sorry, but it's hard ... um, I mean it's difficult to explain this." "Do not be concerned, Sir. I think that maybe I understand," she offered. "In your country, the women they do not want to be a woman, but they want to be more like a man, because they believe that will permit them to have the same jobs and opportunities as a man." "Well, not exactly. I mean, it's not quite so simple as that. It's not that a woman wants to be a man, but yes, they do want the same opportunities. I'm trying to think how to explain this." "Please do not be offended, Sir, but I have a different opinion. For me it seems like the women in America they do not want to be beautiful and sexy if they want to work in a company. They want to be plain so that the men will not notice them as a woman. I think that this is silly because the men they always notice a woman even if she is wearing plain clothes. And this is not an easy thing for me, Sir, because this is not how I was raised in my country. I love to be a woman and I love to be beautiful and sexy." As she spoke, she sat back up in her chair and straightened the sides of her blouse. In doing so, this accentuated the form of her breasts, and I felt a surge of desire. So how could I respond? I thought desperately. I was getting more sexually aroused, and it was getting correspondingly more difficult to think clearly. But I had to say something. I sighed and pressed forward. "I understand, Ms. Rodriguez. What I'm trying to say is that the company and Human Resources have their policies and ... well, for me it doesn't matter if ... uh ... if a female employee wants to look more ... well, plain, or whether you ... I mean, whether she wants to look beautiful and sexy ... um, I mean, I can't really say that word, but ... I mean ... if she wants to look more ... well, like the women dress in your country ... um, that's up to her and I ... I personally don't have any problem with that, either way ... it's just that ... uh ..." My words got stuck because she once again leaned forward attentively, which allowed me another view down her neckline. She was leaning further than before, and I could see not only more of her breasts, but also a bit of her areola sticking out above the material of her skimpy black bra. My penis became so hard that it almost hurt, and I wonder if she noticed how I squirmed in my seat. "Yes, Mr. Martin?" she asked, her eyes gazing deeply into mine. If she noticed that I was looking down her blouse, she didn't let on, because she did nothing to alter the view I had. I was trying at all costs to maintain my decorum and to not betray any of the strong sexual reactions I was having. However, I felt stuck and once again all I could do was fall into stammering, "Um ... uh ... where was I? ..." "I think that I understand you now, Sir. You are saying to me that if a woman she wants to dress in a plain manner or if she wants to be sexy, this is not a problem for you if she does her work in an acceptable manner." "Oh yes ... yes, that's exactly what I was saying, and that indeed is my personal opinion, as well as my policy as head of IT. It's just that ... well ..." My mind was still foggy, and I had to pause to try to choose the right words, but before I could get to my explanation of corporate policy about employee attire, Ms. Rodriquez replied, "Thank you, Mr. Martin. Now I understand your personal opinion and your policy for the department of IT. I can see what you're feeling about me, and I now know that you like the way I wear my clothes, and that you will like it even more if return to wearing my other clothes that are not so plain. Now I know that I have your support, and I will not worry any more if someone tells me that I should dress in a different way." Losing Control in the Office Ch. 01 Shit! This wasn't what I was trying to get across at all! But before I could say anything, she stood up and picked up her tray. "I know that you are a very busy man with lots of responsibilities. Thank you very much for giving me your time, Sir," she said very sweetly and graciously, and with an inviting smile. She started to walk away, but then she stopped and turned her head back towards me and said, "You are a very nice man, Mr. Martin ..." there was a slight pause, and then she gave me a more penetrating look, she pushed her ass out in my direction, and in a lower, deeper, and more throaty voice, she added the word "... Sir". This sent a shiver of lust through me, and I almost choked on my food. She then gave me a wink as she turned forward and walked away. She seemed to be making a point of swaying her hips. Damn! I couldn't take my eyes off her ass as she walked away. My cock was rock hard and throbbing in my pants. Even after she disappeared around the corner I just sat there, staring into space, horny as hell, my head spinning. After a little while, I could think a bit more clearly. Was this a set-up? Did she deliberately toy with me to get me to give her permission to dress the way she wants at work? Or is this just her personality? In other words, I wondered whether she is just naturally flirtatious with all men, given that said that she always likes to express herself as a beautiful, sexy woman. I remember one woman from Colombia that I knew who also acted similarly with men, so maybe this was just a cultural thing and not any kind of deliberate, manipulative game. Also, what did she mean when she said that she could see what I was feeling about her, and that she knew I'd like even more to see her in her other attire? Did she notice my sexual arousal? Or was she talking in a more general sense about how she thinks I'll feel about the overall acceptability of her attire in my department? I got up and went back to my office with the realization that I have to be very careful about Cristina Rodriguez. I have always had a major weakness for seductive women, and she had tapped into that in a huge way, whether or not it was deliberate. I knew that there were likely to be problems with her in the future if she indeed is going to start showing up in outfits that are even sexier than the one she was wearing today, and I vowed to be strong when dealing with these problems. I got back to my office with a very compelling desire to masturbate. I didn't have a chance to bring myself to orgasm earlier, and now, my encounter with Ms. Rodriguez had gotten me a lot hornier. But I had a meeting in a couple minutes, so I just sighed and grabbed my notebook, dreading the rest of the day ahead of me. The afternoon was trying, and not only because I hate all this corporate bullshit. I just couldn't get Cristina Rodriguez out of my head, and my mind kept wandering. At one point, it was especially difficult for me, because I was standing in front of a group giving a presentation, and my thoughts of her began to give me an erection which would have been clearly visible in my pants if I hadn't turned to face the white board and started to improvise drawings to explain the points I was making. Luckily, my erection subsided within a few minutes, and I was able to finish and then sit back down without any incident. It was at the end of the work day when I finally got back to my office. I had been looking forward to locking the door and masturbating, but since it was so late, I decided to wait a little longer and do it at home where I could be more free about it and more comfortable. I'm not someone who takes my work home with me, and so I had put all of the day's business-related thoughts out of my mind as I started to leave my office. Just as I was shutting my door, I heard, "Mr. Martin! Mr. Martin!" I turned and saw that it was Cristina Rodriguez. She had her things with her and it was clear that she was also on her way out. I stood in my office doorway and turned to face her. "Oh, hello, Ms. Rodriguez." I felt a surge of sexual excitement as I saw her approaching. At the same time, I felt that I had to keep my guard up. She reached me at my door and she smiled and said, "I am glad that I found you before you go." "Oh ... well, yes, I was just on my way out," I replied, trying to be a bit distant. I wanted to avoid losing my perspective and my control again, and I vowed that I would be stronger with her during this conversation. "Excuse me, Sir. I know that it is the end of the day, but I would like to talk to you about something. Do you have some time?" She smiled sweetly at me. I detected the faint scent of an inviting perfume. I didn't notice that at lunch. No doubt she put it on as she was getting ready to leave for the day. I felt excited to have her near me, but because I felt so vulnerable to her feminine wiles, I also felt nervous in her presence. The idea of masturbating at home and fantasizing about her from a distance seemed a lot safer than actually being here with her in person. "Well, I don't have too much time now, Ms. Rodriguez. Can this wait until tomorrow?" "I know that you are a very busy man, Mr. Martin. This will not take very long. I promise you." "Are you sure it can't wait until tomorrow?" "Please, Sir," she replied in a low, throaty voice. I felt myself weakening. I sighed. "OK, Ms. Rodriguez. How can I help you?" "Could we go into your office, Sir?" she whispered. "I don't want to talk about this in public." I was going to protest, but somehow, I just didn't have the heart to do so. "Yes, Ms. Rodriguez," I said loudly enough for any over-curious passers-by to hear as they went down the hall. "As all my employees know, my door is always open if there are work-related issues that you need to discuss. Please, come in." I hoped that show of corporate propriety would satisfy any gossips who might have been walking by. I stepped away from the door and gestured for her to enter. She walked past me, and I moved the door to an almost-closed position and said, "Please take a seat, Ms. Rodriguez," indicating one of the chairs facing my desk as I walked around to sit in my own chair. She put her coat and purse on the seat, but then she said, "Could we lock the door, Sir?" she asked. "Uh ... that's not ... um, something that would go over well with Human Resources, I'm afraid." "Please, Sir," she said. "I do not want someone to come in here when I am talking about this." I was going to protest that people here know not to barge into my office, and that her privacy was assured. However, I found myself without much will to do so, and I just decided to let it go. "OK, sure, Ms. Rodriguez," I replied. I started to get up from my desk to go to the door, but she motioned me to stay where I was. She walked to the door, herself, and closed it, and then she looked over at me and slowly turned the little lever in the middle of the knob to lock it. She then leaned back against the door and faced me, bending her knee and putting one of her feet flat against the door. She just looked into my eyes. Standing there like that, she gave the appearance of intimate seductivity. She looked very beautiful, receptive, and sexy, and my horny penis quickly grew hard. I was glad my desk hid the view of that from her. I wondered about the possibility that she was coming on to me, but an instant later I reminded myself that this is highly unlikely, and admonished myself to keep my perspective and to remain strong. "Um ... it's OK. Ms. Rodriguez. You can take a seat." I said graciously, motioning to the chair. Never taking her eyes off mine, she slowly moved her bent knee outward and then back with an expression on her face that seemed to indicate that she was weighing the choice of whether or not to accept my offer to sit down. That leg motion drew my eyes to her crotch, but I instantly caught myself and averted them. She didn't react at all to my glance between her legs, and just kept looking me in the eyes. She looked so beautiful and so hot! I felt a yearning between my own legs as my hard penis strained against my pants. She just remained there against the door, facing me. Apparently, she didn't want to sit down for some reason, and I decided not to force that. "Uh ... so ... what is it you'd like to talk to me about, Ms. Rodriguez?" I asked, trying to convey a boss-like helpfulness along with a little bit of impatience. I was eager to get this meeting over with so I could go home to fantasize about her and masturbate. She pursed her lips and then licked them. She moved her tongue slowly, and I once again wondered if this was a deliberate seductive move. I quickly dismissed the idea, but that didn't prevent me from having a sexual reaction. "I want to talk to you about our conversation during lunch today, Sir," she said in a quiet, low voice. She had an intense look on her face, and her eyes never left mine. "Well, OK, Ms. Rodriguez. Of course." Actually, I was glad, because I thought that this would give me a chance to correct the misconception she had gotten about her clothes. "I know how you were looking at me, Sir," she said, keeping her eyes fixed on mine. A wave of fear shot through my stomach. Ever since she first showed up at lunch, I've been trying hard to hide my sexual feelings and my interest in her. However, if she noticed this at lunch and intended to make a complaint, that could be big trouble for me! No matter what, I had to deny everything. I feigned innocent confusion and hoped she couldn't see my fear. "Looking at you? What do you mean?" "I know you were looking at my body, Sir. Especially my breasts." Shit! I now felt even more scared. Still, I had to deny everything, and I pretended to be surprised and indignant. "What?! Oh no ... now Ms. Rodriguez, I don't know how men behave in big companies in Colombia, but you are clearly mistaking my friendly, professional interest for ... well, for something more ... um, for something it isn't." "I know that you were looking at my ass, also," she continued, ignoring my protest and continuing to look me calmly in the eyes. I was starting to panic. "Now listen! You might believe that, but ... but it's totally and absolutely not true! It's not! I assure you! No way I was looking at you like that. No way! It's clear that you're imagining things, Ms. ..." She interrupted. "I know that you became excited when you looked inside of my shirt, Mr. Martin." She started unbuttoning her blouse while continuing to gaze into my eyes. This stopped me in my tracks. "What?!" I exclaimed, incredulous. I became speechless and just stared at her with my mouth hanging open. She had her blouse completely unbuttoned and was in the process of slipping it off when I finally regained my power of speech. "What are you doing?! Listen! ... no, Ms. Rodriguez. No! You can't do this ... you can't do this here!" By then she had tossed her blouse onto the chair and was unfastening her bra. "I know that you want to see me, Mr. Martin," she said in a low, throaty voice. By then, the bra was off and she tossed it onto the same chair. She kept looking and me and caressed her breasts in a slow, seductive manner. Of course I wanted to look at her! But I couldn't let this happen! Not if I valued my future at this company ... and I do! But I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Her nude breasts were perfect: round and firm, and not too large, with shapely brown nipples that made me think about her rubbing them up and down my penis. Her fingers played with her breasts and nipples in a way that made me think of her doing the same thing to my balls and my erection, which by now was screaming for attention in my pants. It was all I could do to hold myself back from rubbing my crotch. Then again, this seemed too good to be true, and whenever something appears that way, it usually is. "Look, Ms. Rodriguez! ... um, I don't know what you're up to ... um, I don't know what you want, but whatever you're trying to ... uh ... trying to get from me, I won't let you get ... um ... uh ..." She turned around and moved away from the door a little, and she bent forward, pointing her bottom at me. This is what stopped me in mid-sentence. She looked over her shoulder at me and began to slowly gyrate her ass in my direction, touching and caressing it seductively as she kept her eyes bored into mine. "I know that also you became excited when you were looking at my ass, Mr. Martin," she purred. I was mesmerized as she teasingly and slowly unfastened her pants, and when she gradually started to lower them. After a little while, she had them pulled down to her thighs, and I could see her ass and her skimpy black panties. She then kicked off one shoe and then the other, and then she squirmed out of her pants. After that, she slowly and seductively slid down her panties and removed them, and then she bent over to pick everything off of the floor. When she was in that position, she made a point to languidly rotate her bottom in my direction. Her nude ass was luscious, and I could see her pussy lips. They were plump and inviting. I couldn't resist any more, and I just had to give the front of my pants a squeeze. I did so, and it felt so fucking good! ... especially as I was watching her move her bare ass for me. I wanted to squeeze my erection and stroke it more, but I forced myself to stop. I had to get control of myself! She then straightened up and placed the pants and panties on the chair with her other things, and she started walking towards me, undulating her body in rhythm with the slow, deliberate steps she was taking. Her pubic hair was trimmed in a very narrow, elongated triangle. She was the most beautiful, sexy, and irresistible woman I have seen in a long time, and she carried herself like she knew it. My heart was pounding and my cock was screaming for attention. "What are you doing?!" I protested. "What do you want? What's this about? Damn it! If you think for one minute that just because you ... whoa! ... wait! ..." As I was protesting, she was walking around my desk. And she then kneeled next to me. My chair had wheels, and she pulled it away from my desk and turned it so that I was facing her. She placed the palm of one hand against my crotch, gently pushing against the hardness of my erection so that it pointed upwards and rested against my groin. She then began to move her hand in very slow circles. "Ohhhhhhh ..." I moaned in pleasure as I fell back in my chair. I was completely unable to resist her. She silently kept this up for a while until I was totally lost in the pleasure, and I was humping against her expertly massaging hand and writhing in my seat. This went on for what seemed like a few minutes. Then, she stopped and withdrew her hand. "Look at me, Mr. Martin," she gently demanded. I opened my eyes, and she once again stared into them. She slowly moved her hand to her mouth and began to make a show of licking and sucking on her fingers. "Imagine me doing this to your long and hard penis, Mr. Martin," she purred. "Mmm ... it is so delicious." She then held her hand in front of her breast and began rubbing her nipple against her wet fingers. "This will feel very good on your hard penis, Sir. It is even more delicious." I wanted everything she was showing me. But thinking about this woke me up from my reverie, and I started reasoning again. I sat up straight and leaned forward. "Now look, Ms. Rodriguez. This is all ... well, _very_ nice ... I won't lie to you ... but I don't for a minute believe that you're doing this ... um, out of the kindness of your heart. So you've got to want something from me. What is it? ... tell me, damn it! Tell me! And whatever it is, don't even think that ..." She just smiled and reached both of her hands to my crotch. She started rubbing my erection through my pants and caused it to move against my groin again. "Ms. Rodriguez! ... no! ... wait! ..." But she just kept it up, and soon I stopped protesting and just fell back in my chair again. "Yes, I want something. I want your penis, Mr. Martin," she said in that low, throaty voice. "You also want this. You want this very, very much, Sir. If you did not want this, you would have made me to stop. Yes, Mr. Martin, you want me to make your penis feel like this. You love my hands. You love the pleasure ..." By then, I was once again lost in the erotic sensations. I seemed to have no power to resist, and in any case, resistance was the furthest thing from my mind at that point. "... You love that I massage your penis in this way," she was continuing. "This is what I want, Sir. I want your penis, and I want your semen. Give it to me. Give it to me now. You know how good it feels when your semen gets so hot inside of you, and then you feel my hands, and it feels so sweet and starts to come out of you." She pressed her finger against the part of my pants that was touching the place on the underside of my penis where the head meets the shaft. At the same time, she squeezed and stroked around my shaft. "You love what I am doing to you. And you love the way I am talking to you. Give it to me. Give it to me now ... Sir. Give me all of your hot, sweet semen. It feels so good. Fill your pants with all of your cream." With that, my orgasm overcame me. I began to thrust and to shoot my come into my underwear. She seemed to know exactly how to press and squeeze my penis to make the pleasure from each spurting gush of my come to be intense and deeply powerful. "Yes ... oh yes ... it feels so good ..." She moaned the words lewdly with each of my hot, wet, orgasmic spasms, "... more ... give me more ... more hot cream ... so hot ... you love it ... ohhhh yes ..." She kept that up until my orgasm completely subsided and I felt completely drained of come. Then, as I continued to lean back in the chair, catching my breath, she raised herself up and cupped my cheeks gently in her hands, and then she slowly pressed her lips to mine. She slid her tongue into my mouth and began to kiss me deeply until I was responding hungrily to her wet, probing tongue with my own. But just as I started to reach around her to pull her to me, she gently disengaged her mouth from me and stood up in front of me. As she looked me in the eyes, she brought her fingers to her mouth and started licking them and sucking them like she had done earlier. After a moment, she stopped and then walked over to the chair and started putting her clothes back on. I just looked at her for a while until I once again had enough presence of mind to speak. "Oh my God!" I panted. "I can't believe this! Thank you! But look ... Ms. Rodriguez ... I mean ... that was ... oh my God that was so damn good! ... but listen ... I don't want you to think that you have any right to ask me ..." "Feel how wet and warm it is inside of your underpants, Mr. Martin," she interrupted, touching her hand to her crotch and completely ignoring what I was trying to say to her. "Continue to wear your underpants and feel that wetness when you go home. It will remind you of me, Sir." By then, she was almost completely dressed and was buttoning her blouse. Her comment made me feel self-conscious, and I got quiet. She finished with her blouse and then put her shoes back on. She straightened herself up and then picked up her things. She walked to the door and rotated the lever in the center of the knob to unlock it. She then turned to me, put her fingers to her lips, and then blew me a kiss. "Good night, Mr. Martin ..." she paused for a second or two and lowered her voice to that throaty whisper again, "... Sir." She brought her hand back to her mouth and sucked her fingers for another few seconds. She then opened the door, turned the lever back to the locked position, and then left, closing the door behind her. Losing Control in the Office Ch. 01 I was dizzy, and I couldn't think, and I felt totally drained, sexually and physically. I just sat there for a while, collecting my thoughts. So apparently, everything that occurred at lunch was indeed deliberate, and she was flirting with me ... or toying with me ... or seducing me ... or _something_. I couldn't believe that a young, beautiful woman would desire a man like me who is so much older ... especially since we didn't know each other at all. Plus, her actions just now didn't seem to be driven by desire, but by something else that I couldn't quite put my finger on. And the fact that I'm someone with power and authority over her in this company made it seem obvious that she probably was going to want something in return for what she gave me. Probably some sort of preferential treatment, maybe a raise. Who knows? In any case, I was loath to give her anything. And this is very risky business! If any of this were to get out to my co-workers or bosses, or to Human Resources, my ass would be grass here! I felt nervous and scared when I contemplated that. To complicate matters, I really liked what she did to me. No, I absolutely _loved_ it! The way she looked, the way she acted, the way she teased and manipulated me, the way she talked dirty to me, and the things she did to me were all right out of my hottest, most delicious sexual fantasies. I felt myself wanting more. That show she gave me with her fingers and her mouth made me want her to suck my cock. And that orgasm was so good, so intense, so satisfyingly draining, that I already was wanting to do this again with her as soon as possible. But I couldn't! My whole world would come crashing down if I gave her anything and got caught, or if any of this ever leaked out! I picked myself up and started getting ready to leave. The wetness in my undershorts was a bit uncomfortable, but for some reason, I felt myself wanting to heed her words and keep wearing them. I was aware that giving in to her wishes like this was a dangerous precedent, but my desire to feel this warm, wet reminder of her was stronger, and I didn't care. All this kept going through my mind on the way home. As I sat in the train, I was aware of my semen becoming sticky and slowly drying in my undershorts. I felt them stuck to my penis. And I confess that it gave me a secret thrill to be feeling this in public without anyone else being aware ... except Cristina Rodriguez, of course. I felt sure that she knew exactly what I was experiencing now, and this made me feel a strange kind of erotic attraction towards her which both scared me and very much excited me. Now that I'm home, I've spent the last hour or so writing this in my journal. I was hoping that this would help me to make sense of the day and of the contradictory thoughts and feelings I'm experiencing, but now that I've written all this down, I still feel just as conflicted as before. Shit! What should I do? I want to escape ... to quit my job and run away. Even though I'd lose my good income and my comfortable life, that might be preferable to having to deal with her and the related conflicts and consequences at work. On the other hand, I want Cristina Rodriguez. I want her more than I've wanted to have sex with any other woman. My undershorts are still stuck to my penis. Maybe I'll keep them on all night in bed. I'm starting to get hard again as I feel those sensations and think about her and everything that she did to me today. I don't know what to do. I'm so confused!