0 comments/ 10429 views/ 1 favorites Two Shades of Blue By: meko Carmen and Joella Blue. Two sisters. Born fifteen years apart on the twenty-sixth day of January. Two different fathers. Two different generations. Two different lifestyles. They're both stubborn and moody, yet intelligent and beautiful. The Blue sisters have claimed to be as different from one another as day and night. "Will you go to church with me this coming Sunday?" Joella asked as she examined her baby sister, Carmen's flamboyant attire and accessories. Carmen lit a cigarette and took a long, deep drag from it as she walked away pretending not to hear Joella's question. "Where are you going, Carmen?" Joella grabbed a section of her silky dark hair with an extra hot curling iron. After searing every strand, Joella finished styling her evenly cut medium-length hairdo. Her almond-shaped eyes stared deeply into the mirror over the bathroom sink checking for any hair that might be out of place. Carmen started to fix herself something to eat for breakfast while praying for the weekend to be over. Carmen was a physical duplicate of her older sister. They possessed the same eyes, same facial features, same body frame, and the same bright smile. "I don't like going to church, Jo. I've told you that a thousand times," she yelled her voice echoing throughout the apartment. Carmen despised her sister's weekend visits even though they took place only three times a year. Carmen always felt that the best gift Joella ever gave her was the day she moved over three hundred miles away. Sad, but true. The last time Joella visited this year she and Carmen fought each other verbally the entire two days. They're last words to each other that weekend were a far cry from 'goodbye' or 'I'll miss you' or 'call me when you get home'. Carmen was a free spirit. She believed in riding on the wings of life moving full steam ahead joyfully embracing all new challenges and adventures. On the other hand, Joella was a conservative individual. She believed in following the many rules society passed down to each and every generation without questioning authority. She never took chances. Joella felt the best kind of adventures should be planned. "You need some stability in your life, Carmen. I believe church can provide that kind of stable lifestyle for you. I don't like the way you live. You never make plans for anything. Do you have any goals or what?" "Jo, I'm not going to dignify those smart ass remarks with a response. But I will say this...leave me alone, please." "What's wrong with church? You don't believe in God or something?" Joella smoothed out her two-piece light blue pantsuit with her hands as she walked towards the kitchen where Carmen was fixing breakfast. "Why must we go through the same conversation every time you're here, Jo? I do believe in God, but I just don't feel comfortable in church. It's full of hypocrites, especially the minister." "What?! I can't believe you just said that to me, Carmen. I want butter on my toast, please." "Well, I can't help how I feel about church goers. And you know I'm right, you just don't want to admit it. Get the butter out of the refrigerator yourself. How do you want your eggs?" "All I'm saying is that you should at least give it a try before you start condemning the church. I'll take my eggs scrambled," Joella poured herself a cup of freshly brewed coffee taking a careful sip as she watched her little sister crack two eggs into the butter coated frying pan. "I've been to church before, Jo. I went to church until I was twelve years old. Then, I went back to church when I was twenty. For me, it just got worse as I got older. I started seeing church for what it really was. A business, a fashion show, and a gathering place for the latest gossip. Do you want some bacon with your eggs?" "It is not a business, a fashion show, or a gathering place for gossip, Carmen. You can't put down an entire congregation of faithful worshippers because of a handful of people who don't take the experience as seriously as the others. Yes, I would like some bacon. Do you have any apple butter?" "Church just isn't my cup of tea, Jo. Plain and simple. And there's absolutely nothing you can say that will change my mind about it. No, I don't have any apple butter, but the grocery store has plenty of it." "Ha ha ha," Joella's sarcastic laugh and grin made Carmen lightly slam her breakfast plate on the kitchen table. "What's your problem, Carmen? Did I make you mad or something?" "No. You wanna say grace?" Carmen sat down facing Joella. Both of them bowed their heads, held hands, and gave thanks for their breakfast. * * * It was four o' clock early Sunday morning. Carmen was extremely tired from the day's events on Saturday after breakfast. She and Joella went to a barbecue at their mother, Mary's house. Immediately after the barbecue, Carmen and Joella went to a local spa. Both of them enjoyed the pampering, facials, mud baths, and full body massages. Later that evening, they went to the mall and took advantage of a few excellent sales in their favorites stores and boutiques. By the time they got back to Carmen's apartment, neither one of them had too much to say except, "I'm tired. I'm going to bed." Although, Carmen needed to get some rest she couldn't sleep. She laid in bed with the lights off wide awake. She tried watching television, but there wasn't anything on except channel after channel of infomercials and idiotic low-budget movies. She sat on the edge of her bed slipping her feet into her fluffy pink bedroom slippers. Often times, she thought about food during the wee hours of the night. And that night was no exception. She remembered the half-full box of Honey Nut Cheerios in the cabinet. She grabbed her robe and went straight for the kitchen. Meanwhile, Joella laid in bed talking on the phone to a friend that lived in the city she moved to a few years ago. She was always taking advantage Carmen and her kind-hearted disposition. On numerous occasions, Joella would charge up to twenty dollars worth of long distance phone calls on Carmen's phone. Of course, she never had the money to pay Carmen back for them. Joella watched one of her videotapes of soap operas while talking to her friend and thumbing through an old issue of a tabloid magazine. She read the interesting points of certain articles of the magazine while giving her friend a complete commentary of the soap operas she was watching on the videotape. Suddenly, the subject changed courtesy of Joella. "Let me tell you about what happened earlier today, girl. Now you know that I love my sister, Carmen with all my heart, right? But you will never guess what she told me today. She doesn't go to church. And girl, she tried to say that she believes in God, but if she did she would go to church and worship Him, you know what I'm saying? And let me tell you something else about her. All she does when she come home from work at night is just go to her room, watch television, maybe listen to some music or something, and write her little poems or whatever. She's only twenty-eight years old. She doesn't go out or date or do anything interesting outside the house." Carmen carried a huge bowl of cereal with bananas, sugar, and milk back towards her bedroom. As she passed by the guest bedroom where her sister was sleeping, she heard her sister talking on the phone. It didn't bother her that Joella was talking on the phone, but she heard her name being said numerous times. The inquisitive little girl inside of her became curious. So, she gently pushed her ear against the bedroom door. "Oh, I forgot to tell you about what happened at the barbecue today at mama's house. One of Carmen's friends came over. I think her name is Tonya or Sonya or something like that. Carmen worries me because that was the only person she really talked to the entire afternoon with the exception of mama. I'm starting to wonder about that little sister of mine. I thought to myself today that it seems strange that the only people I've ever seen my sister associating with were all women. No men. I think she's gay, if you ask me. She's never mentioned any boyfriends, past, present, or future. She never makes any comments about men we see on television or a movie, if they're good looking. I really do believe my sister is a lesbian. Maybe that's why she doesn't go to church? Because she knows no self-respecting congregation will accept that kind of lifestyle, you know what I'm saying?" Carmen couldn't believe what she was hearing. She dropped the bowl of cereal on the floor, but there wasn't any noise that blew her cover since the bowl fell onto the carpet in the hallway. She cleaned up the mess and angrily went back to her bedroom. She locked the door and began to cry with her face on the pillow. Carmen raised her body up from the bed walking over to her chest of drawers. She placed a chamomile fragrant incense stick into an old candle holder. After she lit the incense releasing it's calming aroma throughout her bedroom, she sat on the edge of the bed wiping the tears off her face with a tissue. Meanwhile, Joella continued talking about Carmen, tabloid articles, and soap operas until six o' clock in the morning never realizing that Carmen heard the horrible comments that were made about her. * * * Sunday brunch at the IHOP restaurant became a tradition for the Blue sisters after Joella moved away and returned for her triannual visits. Carmen ordered her usual brunch of french toast, bacon, and orange juice. Joella ordered her usual brunch of pancakes, sausage links, and coffee. Silence permeated their seating area as both of them took sips of the beverages that were ordered. Carmen went over what to say to Joella a million times in her mind as they drove to the restaurant not quite sure how to address the issue of her sister's gossip sessions about her. Joella continued as usual to talk herself, her life, and her world. She was a natural born self-centered, egotistical woman, who only cared about others when they could do something for her. "I want to tell you something, Jo. I'm not gay or bisexual. The only reason why I've never told you about the men I've been in relationships with is because you never asked me or even seemed slightly interested in my life." "What? Where is this coming from all of a sudden?" "You know where it's coming from, Jo." "No, I don't know. If I knew I wouldn't have asked you." "Jo, don't play games with me this morning. I'm not in the mood. I heard you talking about me to your friend last night. Do you not like me or something?" "Of course, I love you, Carmen. You're my sister." "I know you love me as a sister, but it is possible for us not to like each other as a person, as an individual, understand?" "Yes, I like you. But I must admit I am curious about your life. You never share anything with me, so I have no choice but to speculate." "You do have a choice, Jo. You can choose to come to me and simply ask me about my life. Instead, you chose to be like a lot of other people out here in the world and just talk about me like a dog. You hurt me, Jo." "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Although, you shouldn't have been easedropping on my conversation anyway, but I really didn't mean to hurt your feelings." "The easedropping was an accident. I just happened to hear you saying my name a lot, so naturally I became curious about the subject matter. I just don't understand this animosity you obviously have towards me." "Animosity? Now, I know you're losing it. I don't have any animosity towards you except..." Joella took another sip of her coffee and cleared her throat. She avoided eye contact with Carmen, who was waiting on her older sister to finish what she started to say. "Except what?" "Except the fact that you and mama." "What about mama and I?" "It's how close the two of you are with each other. She and I have never been that close. She was never there for me the way she was for you." "So, you thought it was necessary to take that out on me. If any of that is true, Jo, I'm not the one you should be holding any grudges against." "First of all, it is true. Secondly, I never meant to hold any grudges towards you, but I was just upset about it." "Why didn't share this information before now? I had no idea you felt that way." "That's one of the reasons why I try to get you to do the things that I do like go to church and stuff because I want us to have something in common. I want us to be close like you and mama." "We have things in common, Jo. I think you're feeling left out. Maybe you should talk to mama about this situation. It's obviously something that's heavy on your heart." "She doesn't like talking about her innermost feelings, you should know that by now." "Yeah, that's true. Mama isn't very open about her feelings. Well, it's good we're finally talking about it, right?" "Yeah, it is good. It's a start, you know what I'm saying?" Carmen and Joella continued to eat their Sunday brunch. Both of them relieved with knowing they've shared some feelings with each other that have built up over the years. Joella reached for the bacon on Carmen's plate. "Ouch," she yelled in the restaurant as Carmen smacked her hand.