4 comments/ 4220 views/ 1 favorites My Prison By: rschadd Again this has no sex so I must apologize to those looking for it. I write this in an effort to bring some sense to the events of my life and explain my situation. This is based on true events of my life. I make no apologies as it has left me in despair and I am need of a friend. Trouble is, as you will read, I tend to move too quickly. My previous attempt was more a flood of emotions that I needed to release. That and the feedback I received have prompted me to put this together which is more a tail of how I got to be where I am now. Thoses looking for more info on me or her will be disapointed as I choose not give that much detail, sorry. This response I received in particular prompted this writing. Thank You whoever you are! This one is for the 'clear ur soul' part of me. "U have potential to be a good writer..I feel your pain..write again..whether to clear ur soul r for the joy of it..hold on and keep on..Peace" My Prison I haven't even met her, I mean face to face. She was just a soft and soothing voice on the other end of a cell connection or some kind and tender words in email and chat. It didn't take long for me to get lost in the attention of someone new and to reciprocate accordingly. After all it had been 20 years. That was to be my downfall for I am a married man. I have a wife, 2 children, 1 cat, a parrot, a house and cars, and all the usual things that go along with a life in suburbia. My life is not much different that the guy next to me except that I have been living in this prison for 20 years. This is a self imposed prison, mind you. I created it to avoid being alone for the rest of my life. You see, my wife had an affair over 20 years ago. How long it lasted, I am not sure but what I do know is it at least spanned the conception and birth of our second child. Because of this and the fact that her lover was my best friend I was destroyed. The two people I trusted most in the world outside my parents had deceived me. Had taken my trust and love and used it to deceive me. The prison I built consisted of my neat little world of no friends. Oh, I had neighbors and work associations but I would not let any close enough to be called a friend again. Not even my brothers or sisters. That in itself was not good for now, I have no one to turn to and share and confide in. A recipe for disaster and you can trust me on that. It's now 20 years later and I am still with my wife. I used to tell people, and myself, 'look how long we have been together', it must be true love. True Love, I don't even know if it exists for me any more. I know it did once, once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away. But now, all I have is a life I sentenced myself to because I was going to be responsible for the children I brought into this world. I am a Father and I am a Dad. I wanted to be part of their lives and not at the edge but the center as it should be. So I stayed. I sometimes wonder about this decision. Was it worth it? I am now turning 50 years old and my life is normal from an external viewpoint but internally, inside me? I am a mess. I need some tenderness and understanding and physical contact. Touching, cuddling and so forth. These are things that I desperately need and I am not getting. To feel a woman's soft body snuggle into mine as I wrap my arms around her and here her purr in contentment like a cat. To pamper her by giving her a foot massage after a hard day on her feet. To enjoy some simple things, things to be shared by, dare I say, Lovers? Well, I thought I met her. I thought we were getting along well. But that's the way it is with me. I, as I always do, got wrapped up in it and didn't realize her complications and the things being asked of her by me. I am married, she is divorced and to top it off we work for the same company. Our offices are separated by 1500 miles. I guess that was a good thing. This kept us from running headlong into each other at high speed, something we managed to attempt anyway. We just never collided, really. I know in my heart that if I had been able to look deeply into her eyes in the first few days or taste of her lips just once, I would have done or given anything to keep her. As it was, she came to her senses long before I did and took steps to protect her self from my advances. I'm not sure and I guess I'll never know for now she is cool and distant as she should be professionally to me. She is right, of course, but I don't have to like it I just have to respect it. And I do. I would love to tell you more about her. I believe she is a wonderful person with tremendous spirit and determination. But because I respect her privacy I will not divulge any information about her except to say she is my junior by 6 years. I guess I need closure with her. She stopped responding to me and shutdown. I guess this is her defense mechanism and I have no idea if my assumptions are correct. I do believe they are, based on some conversations we had near the end. One other thing I should mention is I believe I had fallen in love with this woman, this angel. I believe that this was the greatest contributing factor to our falling out. I realized that I had indeed fallen for her or was in the process and began acting on my feelings, big mistake. What I had hope was turning into a relationship was now crashing in around me. My actions only served to push her away from me and not bring us together as I had hoped. What was once cute and playful between us was no longer that. She no longer called me on her way to and from work and we chatted less and less. I guess this is an all too familiar theme in one-sided affairs. Now that I have reopened my heart, for she stormed my castle and brought down my defenses, and I am hurting again. I have feelings I have not had in many years. I will do my best to suppress what I feel as I can see this is what she wants, what she has to have. I can not think about myself and have to consider her wishes and needs. I also must not jeopardize her position with the company. I must remain professional in regards to her and our interactions. This may be a task that will challenge me but I will, for her sake, not fail in meeting it. It now seems that this will not matter as she has a new job looming in her future and is leaving the company in less than 2 weeks. We have chatted in IM, as this is our only means to communication now, and I wished her the best of luck with her new job. I did my best to be up and not let on that it was killing me. I guess I was convincing enough for she did not suspect anything of my condition. My task now is to repair my sad little world. Get back to a place where I will be safe from the emotional attacks of others. I really am growing tired of this. Everyday is a struggle. I would bury myself into my work but she is there and I worry that I will slip and cause her problems. Everyday I guess it becomes a little easier for me but then there are some days that no matter what I do I can not get her out of my thoughts but I guess that is the nature of Love. I wish to thank her for giving me a week or two of happiness. For just a short period of time she gave me hope that there is someone out there who is in need of the things I have to offer and can give me the things I have missed for so long. I just hope I can live like this. It has been such a long time since I have been this exposed and I am not sure if I can take it. Only time will tell. I do know that I will need help. I only hope 'I' can allow someone to help me before it is too late. My Prisoner slave I felt like a stalker, well I suppose I was in a way. I watched you for weeks, noting times of the day you finish work, when you come out of work during the day, I looked at every aspect of you life. You'd never seen me, and I'd only seen vague pictures of you, we'd made friends on the PC and through texting on our mobiles. For six months I was your Mistress, you my slave, it was a good relationship, or so I thought, until one day you just stopped contact. When I first saw you, I just knew it was you, sometimes I thought that you'd noticed me, but I was getting paranoid. All I had to do was work out how to kidnap you, you had to know I was the one for you! I didn't have any family, had a crap job, so I decided to give up work, I'd been left money in family wills, but never used it. One weekend I bought a cottage in the Lake District which would be perfect for what I had in mind. It had a basement, which was the whole length and width of the place. I had had it done to my specification into a dungeon, a fully equipped dungeon. But back to the main problem, how was I going to get you? I was watching you going out one dinner time, and it suddenly came to me, you were usually gone for an hour, so I sat in my car and waited until it was around ten minutes to your return, then moved my car closer to your work entrance and got out and waited. I didn't have to wait to long, when I saw you driving towards me, I flagged you down and asked if you would help me change a flat tire, you said to let you park and you would be straight over, I realised I hadn't let a tire down and hoped you wouldn't see. I opened the boot, when I saw you walking back over. You are taller than I expected. You walk straight to the boot to get out the spare, as you bend over I push you in and shut it, it was so easy I couldn't believe it. You were shouting to be let out, so I quickly got into the car and turned the cd player on, so no one could hear your shouts. We had a long drive and I didn't dare open the boot to tie you or anything else, so I drove straight to the cottage, it took three hours and you had gone very quiet. I parked the car in the garage and wondered what to do now. The best thing about this cottage besides the dungeon was that the nearest neighbours were over a mile away. I walked into the cottage to change into my Mistress gear; I had a rubber Basque dress, 6" thigh high boots, the dress had chains across the front, which were holding in my large breast's. I let my long blonde hair hang loose down my back. I got hold of a cane, collar, lead, and handcuffs, and walked to the car. "Can you hear me?" I shout "Yes, what's going on?" you shout back " I'm going to let you out, but any funny games and I'll cane you" " What the fuck is going on?" you shout again "I'm not letting you out unless you are going to comply" I tell you "Ok ok" you answer "I'm going to open the boot just enough so that I can give you some hand cuffs, I want you to hand cuff your hands behind your back, is that clear?" "What's go…" "IS THAT CLEAR!" I interrupt "Yes" you reply So I open the boot slightly and push the handcuffs in, I feel you try to push, but I was quicker and shut it before you had a chance. "When I open up again I want you with your back to me so I can see you have done as I asked, oh and I have a gun" (me with a gun that's a laugh, I don't even know why I said it) "Are you ready?" "Yes" you say I slowly open the boot and you have done as I asked. "Right, before you get out, there are some rules that have to be obeyed 1; you call me mistress at all times 2; you obey me at all times 3; you wear this collar that I will be putting on you at all times If you fail any of these you will be punished ok?" You don't answer me, so I prod you in the back with the cane "OK" I shout, still nothing, so I put the collar on you and shut the boot. "We've got a fucking life time, so you have a good sleep and I'll see you tomorrow" I leave you there all night. When I get up the next day it is raining. I love the rain it's very relaxing. I take my time having breakfast, showering etc. By the time I decide to get you, it is 10.30am and you have been in the boot over 18 hrs. I have dressed in jeans and t-shirt, you don't deserve to see my gear yet. I pick up the cane and some manacles and walk into the garage and shout out to you "ARE YOU READY TO TALK TO ME SLAVE?" " Yes mistress" you whisper "Pardon, did you say something slave?" "Yes mistress" you say louder I open the boot. "Did you have a comfortable night my slut?" "Yes mistress thank you" "Good! Now I want you to get out, I will help you. First swing your legs around and over, and stay like that" You do as I say, I put the manacles on your ankles and pad lock them, they have a foot of chain between the ankles, I grab one of you arms and pull you towards me so you are sat on the edge of the boot, I stand back and you stare at me, an evil stare. I bring down the cane on your thigh. " Don't you dare look at me like that, you impudent bastard." You lower your head " sorry mistress" I take you into the cottage and straight to the dungeon, your eyes open wide when you see what I have in store for you. "Well slave what do you think? That is all for you!" You don't answer "I'm beginning to lose my patience with you, you fucking worm" "May I speak Mistress?" you ask quietly "Yes go ahead" "Why are you doing this Mistress?" This time I don't speak. I take you back upstairs to the bathroom, then take off your handcuffs. "Don't do anything stupid, now strip" You take off your shirt, undo your jeans and they drop to your ankles, then I smell dried urine, I look down and see you have frilly panties on, I start to laugh. "You sad little poof" I stand and stare at you; you look a pitiful sight. "Tut tut slave I think you need a nappy" You look at your feet in embarrassment, once I stop laughing I unlock a cuff on the manacles so you can get out ok your clothes. When you are naked, I put the manacle back on, and tell you to shower. I stand and watch you washing your body, I feel myself getting wet with excitement. I must control myself. You lather around your cock and balls, and I have to stop myself from taking over. When you have finished, I pass you a towel, and you dry yourself. " You must be starving my slut" "Yes Mistress" I handcuff your hands in front of you. I attach a lead to your collar and pull on it, you resist, and I grab the cane and whip it against your legs. "Look you pathetic tosser, we can do this the hard or the easy way, its up to you" I carry on striking you over and over. "Please stop Mistress, please I beg you I will obey anything" "That's better" I tug on your lead and you follow me into the kitchen. "This will be the last time you will be allowed into this part of the cottage for a while my slut, you have a lot of training to get through" I give you some food and water, you begin to stuff your face. "Slow down" I tell you "Sorry Mistress" "Do you know who I am slut?" "Yes Mistress, you are my text Mistress" "Well done, and do you know why this is happening?" "No Mistress" "It will all become clear to you one day my slut" I look at you for a few seconds. "You won't be going back to your job, and you don't have family, so it seems that you will be with me a long time" You say nothing and finish your food. "Right, now for your training" "Yes Mistress" I take hold of the lead and tell you to get on your hands and knees. You find it hard to crawl with the handcuff on, but you make it down the stairs to the dungeon. "Right my slut, what would you like to go on first?" "Mistress?" "You can choose" "I don't know Mistress" "Ok! We'll start over here" Over on one of the walls there are chains hanging from the ceiling, with metal padded cuffs at the ends, and cemented into the floor, four feet apart are padded ankle cuffs. I take the manacles off you and tell you to stand against the wall with your legs apart, I clip the cuffs to your ankles. Then I take off your handcuffs and replace them with the chained cuffs, they are level with your waist. "Do you know what happens now?" I ask you "No Mistress, I don't" I press a button and slowly the arm chains rise and at the same time being pulled out. "Don't look so worried slut this is going to be fun" Your arms are pulled above your head and you try to stand on tiptoe but it's impossible, because of the cemented in cuffs you begin to panic. "PLEASE Mistress, I beg you, stop it please" you plead. Just when you think your arms are going to be pulled from their sockets, I press the stop button. "Mistress it hurts, please Mistress" "Stop whining like a dog" I go to the opposite wall where I have loads of goodies i.e.: gags, hoods, dildo's butt plug's etc. I grab a gag made of leather and a crop. I stand on a stool to put the gag on you, you try to protest, then silence. " That's better, I can't stand yappy dogs" I stand down, then sit on the stool and stare at your body. Your cock begins to grow so I flick the crop at your balls, not hard but hard enough to see your eyes flinch; your cock hardens with every second. " Well well my doggy likes that!" You shake your head to say no. " But I can see differently doggy" I stroke your cock and balls, I want to suck them but I don't. I use the crop on them, you moan beneath your gag. After a few minutes I leave you alone, hanging against the wall. When I return, I bring a tray, with an assortment of needles, you stare in horror. "I don't want you getting hard my slave, not without permission, so I'm going to help you" Your cock is soft now, so I pull your foreskin over your helmet and take a needle, but you are moving too much. There are leather straps behind you at different heights, I pull one tightly around your waist and one on each leg at the top, now you can't move. I take a needle, and push it quickly through your foreskin, and do the same with three more. "There! That wasn't painful was it? Bit it will if you get hard, oh and they are sterile" Your face is wet with sweat as is your body, I get some nipple clamps, and attach them to your nipples, and then I get a very large buttplug and lubricate it and push it into your arse until it slides into place. You are breathing very deeply and watching my every move so I lick your cock very gently, your eyes close tightly and I can see you are concentrating on not getting hard, but its not working, your cock is getting hard. It is getting to the point where your foreskin is pulled tight over your helmet. I wanted to see what would happen, but I couldn't be that cruel, so I take the needles out very quickly and you visibly relax. I press the down button and you are lowered. Once you are lowered I uncuff you and put your manacles back on and take you to your resting-place, in the corner, next to a bathroom, which had a shower and toilet. There are a few blankets, and cemented into the floor, is a chain, long enough to reach the bathroom. I attach the chain to your manacles and padlock them, then tell you to get some sleep. When I get into bed I masturbate myself to a wonderful orgasm. The next day I take down your breakfast, then tell you to shower. I open a cupboard and stand back so you can see inside. "In this cupboard there are different outfits, from tomorrow I want you showered and dressed in the outfit of your choice, this is to be done before I come down with your breakfast, if you fail, I will leave you chained to your bed all day on your own. This is something to be earned, so if you displease me in anyway it will be taken away do you understand?" " Yes Mistress, thank you Mistress" Once you have finished your breakfast, I attach the lead and take off your manacles, and lead you to a leather-covered table, and tell you to lie on it. There are leather straps all along, I strap your legs apart and your arms by your sides, and then I pull a strap over your neck and pull it tight, just so you can breath without passing out. Your cock is hardening very quickly. I straddle you and help myself to your cock, riding it and ramming it into me, you moan with pleasure, "don't you cum slut" "No mistress" you strain. But I can see you are about to cum, then like a volcano you erupt, shouting out in ecstasy. I get off you, turn and walk away. " Mistress, please forgive me, I couldn't help it, please mistress" you beg knowing you will be punished. I walk to the toy wall I reach for the cat o nine tails, walking back to you smiling. I trail the whip over your chest and down your belly, over your cock, which is still wet. "You came" I say calmly "Yes Mistress, I'm so sorry" I pull the whip back, then flicked it over your balls, you cry out. "DON'T MAKE ANY NOISE" I shout " Sorry Mistress" I flick it harder this time; you bite your lip. " That's better" I whip you from head to toe "Don't ever come without permission again" "No Mistress I'm sorry" When I finally stop you look as if you have sunbathed too long, bright red. I take some string and bind your cock tight, and then I include your balls. You moan in pain, so I get a plastic ball, which just fits in your mouth when I push it in, then a rubber gag on top, this does the job nicely. I take some nipples clamps and screw the tight to your nipples. "Ok! I think that will do, I'm going shopping now, I'll be a couple of hours." Your eyes widen when you realise how long you will be left like this. I walk out the door laughing, leaving you mumbling, trying to tell me something. I come back late afternoon; I was longer than expected, so I decide to dress in my Mistress gear. When I walk in, you have your eyes shut, so I swing a cane down hard just missing your head, you jump and look startled, then you look me up and down, as far as your eyes will let you. I unstrap you and put leather cuffs on you. "Get off the table." You swing your legs round and try to stand you are a little shaky. I tell you to take two steps and above your head are three chains, two with hooks. I tell you to raise your arms, I stand on a stool to hook your cuffs to the chains, then pull the third chain to raise the arm chains tight, I check your bindings then get some Clingfilm, I wrap from your toes up to your head, then take off the gag and take out the ball. "Do you have anything to say my slave?" "Thank you Mistress?" "No" "No Mistress I don't sorry" "Ok" I get a clear plastic bag and put it over your head, tying string around your neck so it is airtight. There is panic on your face. "Please Mistress, please don't" "Shut up" It doesn't take long for the air to go, and the bag is sucked very tight to your face, you begin to shake, struggling to breath, then your head droops down and you are still. I take a knife to cut off the string and bag. I lower the chains so that your knees are slightly bent and get a wet flannel to wipe your face. Slowly you come round. "Thank you Mistress" you say breathlessly. When you have recovered you ask if you are permitted to speak and I tell you, you can. "If it pleases my Mistress, may I make love to you?" It's my turn to look shocked and don't know what to say, this is something I have wanted but didn't think would happen. "Yes, it would please me greatly." You take my hand and lead me to your bed, you take off my boots, skirt, but you leave the Basque, you look at me so lovingly, which is hard to believe after all I've put you through. You lie me down and your lips meet mine, then you go to my feet and kiss and lick your way up my legs, missing my pussy and up my belly you reach my breast's and lower the Basque, taking my breast's in your hands you kiss and suck them. I can feel your hard cock against my leg, god I need you so bad, but I stay quiet, slowly you move down my body, telling me how beautiful I am, and making me feel that I am the only person you have ever loved. You reach my pussy, which it hot and wet, I moan loudly as your fingers part my lips and you lick my clit so softly, I feel my self wanting to cum, then you suck it as you push a finger into my wet cunt and finger fuck me to an amazing orgasm. As I'm getting over my orgasm, you push your hard throbbing cock into me, hard and deep, you are moaning as much and as loud as I am now but I don't care, we are one, fucking each other furiously. I feel you start to cum and I orgasm at the same time. We are both breathless, but start all over. We finally fall asleep. I wake before you and go up stairs to shower and make your breakfast. I bring it down to you, and you are stood, already showered and with a slave harness on. "Good morning Mistress, I am ready for your pleasure and my pain." You say with a big smile on your face. "Good morning" I smile. I was right! It did become clear to you. You knew you belonged to me!