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Luxury Accommodation Ch. 02

By: Whitesocks



This is a sequel and will make no sense without the original story.

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Eight years passed after I got my MEng first and some additional honours during which I worked for a few organisations before I settled with a big Dutch company. I had achieved a reputation as an expert in flow mechanics and I must have been good at it because they paid me well. I worked on dams, Oil rigs and any place where the flow of liquids and gasses needed to be controlled. 

I travelled the world and screwed my way through the female population in many different countries. I had no permanent base and no responsibilities other than my job and spent most evenings somewhere in the world seated at a hotel bar. I awoke every day with a hangover but told myself that I was a social drinker, even though I drank mostly alone. The only time I eased off the booze was when I had a tricky assignment the following day.

I frequently wondered what would eventually become of me. Would I finally expire in a foreign motel where nobody spoke English and there would be no one to mourn me? Or would I finish up a lonely bachelor paying classy call girls obscene amounts of money because young chicks no longer fancied me? I had no close friends and soon lost touch with foreign acquaintances when I moved on.

Perhaps I would be sipping a Pisco Sour in a bar in Lima or a Black Balsam in Riga when my thoughts would wander back to Emma. I'd never contacted her again or been close to where she lived.

I would find myself smiling as I recalled how she would giggle helplessly at my nonsense or when she would try to cheat at backgammon if she thought I wasn't looking. Had she found herself a man? I hoped Rodney had been a disappointment, in fact I hoped they had all been disappointments. Then I wiped that jealous thought away because I just wanted her to be happy whatever.

******************************

I was clinging to a metal ladder halfway up a semi-constructed water tower in the bleak bowels of Scotland. The wind was howling and the temperature was below zero. I'd been brought in as a consultant and I was trying to convince the foreman that water does not flow uphill. I had a hangover and I vaguely recalled fucking one of the hotel staff on a restaurant table after closing time.

My phone chirped with a text and I dragged it out with frozen fingers and stared numbly at the words.

They said, "Do you fancy a cup of tea?"

Back in the hotel bar I swallowed a large scotch to thaw by brain and ordered another. I stared at the phone on the counter in front of me and every two minutes when it switched itself off I switched it back on again. Several times I attempted to text a reply and once just a question mark. 

Why had she contacted me, was it for a specific purpose or just for old time's sake? Perhaps she was ill, maybe even dying and wanted to say goodbye. She would be older, I was older. If it was just for a social visit did I want to be introduced to a husband as an old friend; how awkward would that be? I could think of no logical reason for the invitation.

Half a bottle later and back in my room I spent another hour agonising. I couldn't refuse, I didn't want to refuse. Eventually I decided that if it was just for old time's sake then why not? I typed, "Okay, Saturday afternoon," and just before I hit the send button I added, "Looking forward to it."

******************************

I checked into a hotel Friday evening and headed for the bar. I ordered a large scotch and swivelled around on my stool to view the occupants. The room was full and noisy with chatter. There were three females sitting alone and a blonde with dangly earrings who smiled at me was almost certainly a hooker. The other two were of no interest and probably waiting for their partners.

I swivelled back again in shame that I had even considered sex when I would be seeing Emma the next day.

I pulled up two streets away and sat in thought. I was nervous because I was used to having everything planned and calculated in advance for fear of flooding a city and I was uncomfortable heading into the unknown. Right then I needed a drink and pulled the flask from the glove compartment. I'd unscrewed the top and raised it to my lips when I realised that I'd smell of booze if we kissed. I put the flask away again.

I restarted the engine and drove the short distance to her road. As I turned into it I remembered the first time that I had viewed my accommodation and how suspicious she had been. I nosed up to the closed garage door and wondered if the un-driven Jaguar was still sitting in there.

After a squirt of mouth spray and a few deep breaths I climbed out and walked to the front door. From habit I reached into my pocket for the key, but that was a long time ago so I rang the bell.

It was the same soft smile and laughing eyes with neat blonde hair and trim figure. Sure she was older but it was just a later edition and still as beautiful.

"Hello Chris, it's lovely to see you again." 

"Hello Emma."

She held out her hands to pull me towards her and kiss me lightly on both cheeks. Holding hands we walked into the lounge and she said, "The tea is brewing, make yourself comfortable."

I settled into the same chair and kicked off my shoes as I always did. The place looked the same and smelled the same, in fact nothing appeared to have changed. A portly Banjo wandered in and stopped dead with wide open eyes. He trotted towards me and butted my leg.

She returned and enquired, "Still four lumps?"

"Please. I can't believe that's the same teapot."

"It's the first time I've used it since you left."

I sipped my tea and said, "You are still as beautiful and as sexy as ever, how do you manage it?"

"I look after myself," and she was serious when she observed, "I'd like to say the same about you but you look like shit. Your face is ashen and your eyes....well I believe 'piss-holes in the snow' is the coarse expression. You even have a paunch; what the hell has happened to you?"

I sighed and answered, "When your whole world is in a suitcase and you spend days on end hanging around in boring airports, sometimes the nearest bar becomes your friend; I'm not proud of it. So fill me in with the last eight years, have you found yourself a man?"

"No."

"So you're still living alone?"

"No."

I considered the equation and there remained only one solution. I recalled the first time that she'd seen a lesbian video and her subsequent reaction. A wave of horror washed over me and I gasped, "Please don't tell me you're shacked up with a female."

"I'm afraid so, would you like to meet her?"

I recoiled in terror at the thought of, "This is the guy who used to fuck me before I fell in love with your pussy," and I answered vehemently, "I'm sorry Emma but no I wouldn't; I came to see just you."

She laughed at my panic and said, "Calm down you silly man. Just stay put and trust me because she wants to meet you."

She left the room and I sat alone with a sick feeling that was caused only partly by the previous evening's booze. I scratched Banjo's head and waited for her return with a sense of foreboding. She re-entered holding the hand of her young companion and I breathed evenly again. She went back to her chair and left the cute little girl standing in front of me.

She had neat blonde hair and blue eyes and was wearing a short yellow dress that was pleated below the waist. Under her dimpled knees she had yellow socks and shiny brown shoes with a single strap across the instep. Her large eyes were solemn when she held out her hand for me to shake it.

With a feeling of relief I took it gently and our hands went up and down in a slow shake. I enquired, "Hello young lady, may I ask your name?"

"It's Chrissy short for Christine."

I smiled and responded, "Well that's almost the same as mine which is Chris short for Christopher."

"I know."

She took three paces backwards and folded vertically to sit on crossed legs. Her expression remained solemn and her gaze was focussed directly at my face.

I turned to Emma with the obvious question but I didn't ask it. 

Both females were expressionless and staring at me without emotion and the silence dragged on for several seconds. I could feel the hairs on my arm prickling and my mouth was suddenly dry. There was a pulse beating in my right temple and I wondered if it was visible.

Something was wrong, something was terribly wrong.

I desperately needed a drink of any sort and croaked, "Would you get me a glass of water please Chrissy?"

She left the room and I turned to Emma. She had the trace of a smile on her lips.

My throat was so dry my voice was just a whisper when I asked, "How old is she?"

"Eight," and that was the answer I didn't want to hear.

Chrissy returned with a glass full to the brim and advanced carefully with her eyes fixed intently on the nearly overflowing level. She handed it to me carefully but I spilled some in my lap as I took it with a shaking hand. I gulped a few mouthfuls and placed the glass on the side table.

Emma said quietly, "Would you leave us for a short while please Chrissy?"

The child turned and left the room.

My heart was thudding and I could feel my armpits sweating. The pulse in my temple was beating harder as I stared at Emma and waited.

She made the statement without any emotion. "It seems that he was firing blanks after all."

The shock of her words was devastating and I could only stare at her in disbelief. There was thunder in my ears and a metallic taste in mouth. I tried to swallow but my throat was too dry. My chest was so tight I wondered if I was close to a heart attack.

Jumbled thoughts and images tumbled in chaos though my bewildered mind until I finally wrestled out, "How can you be sure? What about Rodney, or anybody else for that matter?"

"There never was anyone else."

"But what about the weekend on his boat?"

"I lied, he didn't have a boat."

In utter confusion I asked, "Then why the hell did you say he had?"

"To get rid of you."

I was shocked by her reply and said, "But we were having such fun, why did you want to get rid of me?"

"Because I already knew."

"You already knew?" I was angry and demanded, "Then why the fuck didn't you tell me?

She breathed a big sigh and with exaggerated patience answered, "Oh get serious Chris, it would have destroyed you. Would you have achieved your first and all those other fancy honours with me dragging you back? Could you have coped with me being sick every morning and flopping about like an elephant seal and still have sailed your way through your finals?"

I knew she was right but my feeling of guilt was overwhelming. I said weakly, "But you had to do it all by yourself."

She laughed and came back with, "Daily help, a top gynaecologist; it was a breeze. Chrissy popped out without a struggle and she's been a dream ever since. You had to know and you would never have forgiven me if you'd found out some other way.

You gave me a wonderful goodbye present and every day since has been a happy one. She is amazing and you can be proud of her. Between us we've created a really sweet human being and it's up to you if you want to share her with me."

Even though I was reeling with shock I had to ask, "So there's never been anyone but me?"

"I didn't say that. There was never anyone before Chrissy but I wasn't going to waste all the education you gave me so there were some afterwards. I gave a few blowjobs until it was time to fire the babysitters and give her my full attention."

I was mentally and physically exhausted and asked limply, "Do you have any alcohol?"

"Do you want to stink of it when Chrissy comes back? She might want to get close to you." She stood up and said, "Come with me I want to show you something."

On the way up the stairs I could see Chrissy on a swing in the garden. We walked along the corridor to my room and when we entered there was no doubt it was a girl's bedroom. There were fluffy things and the obligatory teddy bear, a computer with a pink bendy keyboard and pin-ups on the wall. Emma stood by in silence and I asked, "What am I supposed to be looking at?"

She said nothing so I looked around again. Then I took a closer look at the pin-ups and blinked with surprise. In among the photos of boy-bands and pop stars there were some of me. There was I sunbathing in the garden, with floured hands in the kitchen, cuddling Banjo and many others.

I couldn't speak and I was afraid to look at Emma for fear she would see how choked I was. But she knew and I felt her arm slip around me. I struggled to keep an even voice but it was tremulous when I finally asked, "How long has she known?"

"Ever since she was old enough to think for herself and I left it up to her to decide when it was time. You've never been off my radar."

"I've been to some desolate places."

"But I always knew where you were. I paid a lot of money to keep tabs on you and my God you've bedded some wenches."

I responded with, "Well as the guy said; I've never been to bed with an ugly women but I've sure woken up with a few."

We returned downstairs and she called in Chrissy. Still with the same solemn expression she folded into her crossed legged position and stared searchingly into my face. I tried several times to speak but my lips were numb and I could only stare back at her. I drank again from the glass beside me until I got some spittle in my mouth. I guessed no one would say anything until I did so I tried to breathe evenly as I prepared myself to hear it from the child.

With a tight throat I finally struggled out, "Do you know who I am Chrissy?"

"You're my Daddy."

They were simple words but her answer was a towering tsunami that engulfed me and I was swept helplessly away. I could feel myself drowning in the truth of it and tried to struggle to the surface to breathe but its force dragged me to the depths. I was no longer man enough to cope with such responsibility and it overwhelmed me.

All of the emotion had been building a pressure that I could no longer contain and when it burst free I covered my face as the sobs racked me.

I felt her young body climb onto my lap and her warm arms wrap around my neck. Her soft face was against mine when she whispered, "Mummy has told me all about you and sometimes it would make her cry. Every night I said a prayer that one day you would be my Daddy and cuddle me but you've always been so far away. I'm just happy that you are here at last."

I was recovering slowly and trying to come to terms with the devastating news. I said limply, "Honestly Chrissy I don't think you would want me as your daddy, I wouldn't be very good at it."

She took my face in her hands and looking earnestly into my eyes replied, "Then let me teach you how to be a good daddy." I looked to Emma for support but she just shrugged her shoulders.

Chrissy whispered, "I know it's not fair because you didn't know about me so please don't be angry. If you decide to go we will both understand, but will you first please cuddle me."

I put my arms around her small warm body and held her close. She snuggled against me and it was a strange but not unpleasant experience.

She looked down and said, "Banjo would also like you to stay. Mummy said that he didn't eat for two days after you left."

She added, "And anyway, Mummy told me you like kids."

I muttered, "Well I do, but I couldn't eat a whole one."

She exploded into giggles and the room was bright with sunshine.

Dinner was my favourite chicken pieces in a sticky garlic sauce and we all had some to avoid offence. Banjo had his without the sauce. We retired to the lounge and relaxed with wine and beer and Chrissy had a soft drink. I heard that she was learning Spanish and taking ballet lessons. Emma had tried to get her interested in the piano but she preferred the clarinet.

After a few beers I got more into it and the two of them laughed at some of my nonsense. Chrissie went to bed at ten and her wet kiss on my cheek lingered pleasantly for some time afterwards. Emma and I didn't talk much and there were long silences. She was giving me time.

We both retired not long after Chrissy and I lay in bed and pondered my uncertain future without coming to a decision. Eventually I switched off the light and then switched it back on again to let Banjo in.

******************************

I don't drink much anymore and ballet bores me senseless, but that's where I've been persuaded to take them today.

Luxury Accommodation Ch. 03



The morning after I learned that I had an eight year old daughter I lay in bed feeling both mentally and physically strange. Mentally because I was in shock and physically because I didn't have a hangover. Insomnia is not usually a problem for heavy drinkers and as I had hit the sack sober I hadn't slept very well.

Banjo jumped off the bed and I opened the door a few inches to let him out. It was seven-thirty on a Sunday morning and the house seemed quiet.

I showered and I had brought a change of clothes and some toiletries on the chance that I might be staying the night.

As I crept along the corridor and reached the top of the stairs I could smell cooking, but my breakfast was in a flask in my car. I descended the stairs quietly and had reached the front door when a cheerful voice said, "Good morning Daddy, breakfast is ready. Where are you going?" I turned to see Chrissy dressed in a pink jump suit and looking fresh and bright.

Quietly cursing I replied, "I'm just getting something from my car."

When I got into my car she stood in the doorway watching me and I was faced with the problem of taking a swig without being seen. I ducked low and swallowed a quick mouthful and when I looked up she had disappeared. I took another healthy slug and put the flask back in the glove compartment and grabbed the mouth spray. It was empty.

As my blood started to flow again I returned to see Chrissy standing with her arms outstretched and her eyes closed. I sidestepped her with, "Back in a minute," and ran up the stairs to the bedroom to quickly swill my mouth with toothpaste. I descended at a more leisurely pace and stopped halfway with a spreading smile. Nearly two minutes had passed and Chrissy had not moved. Still with her eyes closed and her arms outstretched she stood motionless. She was as nutty as her mother.

When I hugged her with a kiss to each cheek she said with relief, "Phew, my arms were getting really tired."

I swept her up and carried her into the kitchen where Emma was cracking eggs into a pan. She was wearing black slacks and a bright orange tank top and looked stunning. She said cheerfully, "Good morning Chris, did you sleep well?"

Untruthfully I replied, "Not bad thanks considering all things."

For the first time in many years I sat in a private home and enjoyed a breakfast with people I knew. No queuing at a buffet, no standing with a tray and looking around for an empty seat and no waiters saying, "I'll attend to you in a moment Sir."

Chrissy demanded that I cut her toast into soldiers because she could never get them even and I chided Emma for refusing to eat her crusts. Emma and Chrissy were engaged in some tomfoolery when I found myself looking at Emma. She was laughing when she looked at me and for a fleeting second our eyes locked, but I was the first to look away.

Chrissy asked, "Can we go to the park and feed the ducks Daddy?"

It didn't sound very exciting but I was in a pliant mood so I replied, "Sure."

She expanded the subject by continuing enthusiastically, "My favourites are the Goldeneyes and the Mandarins. Do you have a favourite?"

I answered, "Yeah, the one that goes best with orange sauce." I thought that was a slick answer and expected a giggle. Instead there was silence and I looked up to see Emma with her eyes shut and her face screwed in a grimace of apprehension.

Cautiously I turned my gaze to Chrissy who was staring at me with condemnation in her eyes. It was too late to retract the remark so I mumbled lamely, "That was supposed to be funny but I don't think it was."

She responded firmly, "No it wasn't and I'm very disappointed in you. I don't think the ducks will feel comfortable with you feeding them."

"Well don't tell them what I said because I didn't mean it."

Her eyes softened and she said, "Alright but just keep smiling at them."

I thought we would grab some bread and head out but I was wrong. Chrissy informed me that bread had little nutritional value and we had to feed them with an approved diet. She supervised the assembly line with Emma defrosting frozen peas and I was given the job of forming small round balls of dampened oats. Chrissy prepared some rice.

During the activity I stole a glance at Emma with a questioning look but she replied with a resigned shrug of her shoulders.

When everything was to Chrissy's satisfaction we strolled to the park well wrapped up on a crisp winter morning. During the walk she explained which ducks emigrated during the winter months and which stayed and how the patterns were changing. I was astonished by her knowledge and asked her if she was interested in ornithology. She knew what the word meant and replied, "Not particularly." When I asked how she knew so much about bird migration she answered, "I just know."

On the way back I suggested that we had a pub lunch but that was vetoed by Emma who said there was food prepared at home. So I persisted with, "How about just a drink then?" and the two females looked at each other in silent communication as only females can.

Emma eventually replied, "I haven't been in a pub since my late teens, and anyway what about Chrissy?"

Before I could answer, Chrissy replied, "It's okay when I'm accompanied by adults and there is a food and soft drinks bar."

I had no idea if she was correct but I wanted a drink so I said, "I was just about to say that so let's go and sample the local beverages."

Emma was not enthusiastic but she went with the flow and we were lucky when the first pub we came to exhibited a prominent notice, "Families Welcome."

It was early and there was plenty of room so I ushered them to a booth as far from the bar as possible. When I went with the order of a pint, a glass of wine and a soft drink I flashed a twenty pound note at the barman and said quietly, "Give me a large vodka before you pull the pint." He got the message and slid it to me without fuss.

Back at the table Emma had begun to thaw and as the pub started to fill and the atmosphere became charged with excited chatter she looked as if she was enjoying herself. I was sufficiently lubricated to act the fool and even talked them into a second round when I added some more cash to the barman's unearned income.

On the walk back Emma giggled that it was a relief that lunch was cooking itself as the wine might otherwise have impaired her culinary expertise. When we got home a steak and kidney pudding, one of my favourite meals, was happily steaming away.

I made sure there were no leftovers and then demolished the remains of an apple crumble. As I scraped up the last morsels I realised how much I had missed home cooking. To the two watching females it must have been like feeding time at the zoo.

We relaxed with coffee in the lounge and after a few minutes Chrissy said she was going to talk to some friends on her computer. I thought I glimpsed a meaningful look at her mother as she was leaving.

Emma and I sat in silence until she said, "Well what are you going to do?"

"Like what?"

"Are you going or staying?"

I shifted uncomfortably before I replied, "Look Emma, yesterday I was me and today I'm someone else. Surely you must realise that none of this seems real and I need some time."

"So you're saying that you can't handle having a new daughter?"

Emphatically I replied, "Let's get this straight, she is not a new daughter. She is a used daughter, a previously owned daughter albeit by one careful owner who has had her for eight years."

She ignored that and persisted, "Do you want to break her heart? She's waited all the years that she's known about you and all you're going to give her is twenty-four hours?"

I was reluctant to admit it but I replied, "Emma I'm not the man I was. I drink too much and I'm badly out of shape although I can still do my job okay. I travel around and my home is the next shitty hotel in some shitty country. I would be here today and somewhere else tomorrow."

"She knows you have to travel but all she wants is that you keep coming back and this can be your home. You are still a young man, although you look like you need a fifty thousand mile service, and you can watch her growing up. You'll have more years with her than I will."

I could feel myself weakening but I needed to know one thing. "What about us?"

"Us doesn't matter right now, let's take it as it comes. Is it a yes or a no?"

I still wasn't satisfied and persisted, "What would I be, a lodger or a part time father?"

"Both. You didn't pay any rent before and if you want to contribute then spend it on Chrissy. Don't worry she won't let you spoil her. Now be a man and go and get your stuff."

On the way back to the hotel I wondered what I was taking on but at the same time I was faintly conscious of a feeling of pride. I had achieved little of any value in my life and she was a very pretty girl and certainly intelligent.

From habit I headed straight for the bar and when the barman asked for my order I replied, "Changed my mind thanks," and walked away feeling good.

I didn't feel quite so good on the way back to the house and the doubts crept back again. For years my life had been sex and booze but now that was about to change. Would I be able to adjust? I honestly didn't know.

Once again I was in possession of a house key and went straight to my room. After I had unpacked I headed downstairs and marched determinedly into the lounge. I fired the first salvo with, "What are those bathroom scales doing in my shower room?"

With a look of innocence Emma asked, "Bathroom scales? What bathroom scales?"

"The ones that weren't there this morning."

After a pause she replied thoughtfully, "Oh those scales. I expect the cleaner took them away to clean them and now she's put them back."

"On a Sunday?"

She responded aggressively, "Alright I put them there because I thought you might want to get into shape. You used to have such a beautiful body but now your gut is hanging over your waist band. Sling them out if it pisses you off."

I was serious when I responded, "Emma you are not stupid but if you push me that will be very stupid. I'm going to try to change a lot of things but it will take time."

When I'd showered I looked down at the scales. After a deep breath I climbed on and stared in disbelief at the numbers. I breathed, "Jesus Christ," and climbed off again.

******************************

I had plenty of leave owing and decided to take a few days off. I went into town and bought myself some trainers and started with some brisk walks building up to a clumsy jog that finished with me heaving and gasping against a wall. Although I kept a flask topped up in the car and had the occasional nip, I found myself unscrewing the top less frequently.

Chrissy was back at school and left at seven every morning and didn't get home until nearly five. A cab called for her each day which I thought was strange but Emma said the school was far away. I didn't question it at the time and although I assumed that there must have been closer schools I guessed she had chosen one carefully.

Although I spent a considerable amount of time with Emma during the day, there was never any suggestion of sex and for the most part we were polite to each other with a touch of awkwardness.

The three of us always spent the evenings together when we would watch television or play games. Whenever the news was broadcast Chrissy would watch it with interest and that always surprised me. After she went to bed Emma and I would not talk much but occasionally play backgammon during which there was plenty of rivalry.

It was on a Saturday evening that the situation took a dramatic new direction. Chrissy liked me to tuck her in and kiss her goodnight and I knew that was what a daddy was supposed to do. Anyway it gave me pleasure.

When I was tucking her in she asked, "Do you love Mummy?"

I answered, "Love is a very complicated subject and it's not always honey and roses as you will find out one day. Sometimes mums and dads argue a lot and seem to get quite angry but deep down they really love each other. One day you will understand."

She replied calmly, "I understand perfectly. You and Mummy each have strong personalities and enjoy fighting each other to see who wins."

I was surprised and said, "Yes that's true and it's because we are both very stubborn people."

She persisted, "I still want to know if you love Mummy?"

I cast my mind back eight years and considered the question carefully. I thought about Emma's bloody mindedness, her zany humour, her soft and gentle kisses and her passionate love making.

Eventually I answered, "I have never loved anyone else."

She responded, "Good because she loves you and always has."

"If you say so."

It started to get complicated when she continued, "If you both love each other why then are you sleeping in separate bedrooms?"

The situation was getting awkward so I said, "Honey you're talking about something that you don't yet understand."

Then she came at me with all guns blazing when she said, "I'm talking about sex."

My jaw dropped and I fought against rising panic. I tried to speak calmly but my voice was a high pitched squeak when I spluttered, "You can't say things like that at your age. I don't know where you're getting this from but I'm going to have a word with your mother."

She continued, "Calm down Daddy and let's discuss this sensibly. Sex is one of the ways that two people can show that they love each other, but they can't from separate bedrooms."

With no training for such a situation I was completely out of my depth and I wanted to run away. I decided that my best strategy was to chicken out so I said weakly, "Chrissy I'm really sorry but I'm not very good at this sort of thing, may we talk about it some other time?"

She answered in the same calm voice, "Daddy I know you're embarrassed but I'm just trying to get things moving. I'm not old enough to have emotions like carnal desire and that stuff so I'm only telling you what I know. You are the male of the species and you have to go to her because she won't come to you."

I was on the canvas and the referee was counting me out. I just wanted to get out of the room and heard myself say, "Thank you for the advice Darling and I'll do my best. May I go now?"

She kissed me goodnight and I staggered out of the room to lean exhaustedly against a wall. As my strength returned and my resolve built up I stormed down the stairs and into the lounge.

Emma was reading a book and I snapped, "Put that book down and pay attention. I don't know what the hell you've been teaching your daughter but I've just been lectured about the birds and the bees by an eight year old child."

"Did you learn anything?"

I replied vehemently, "This is not funny. She is a very sweet kid but I am sorry to say that she is not normal."

Emma looked at me without expression and then closed her book. She placed it carefully on her side table and said, "You've been here for quite a while and you've only just come to the conclusion that she is not normal?"

Was I missing something? I enquired tentatively, "Why do you say that, isn't she normal?"

Emma sighed and then asked, "Why do you think she knows all about ornithology, licensing laws and sex among many other things?"

I thought about it and ventured, "Because she's bright?"

She continued, "Try giving it some more thought. She's driven fifty miles to her school every day when there's one around the corner. Why do think that is?"

I definitely was missing something and replied cautiously, "I don't know, you tell me."

She was struggling for patience when she asked, "Do you know what a gifted child is?"

"Of course I do."

"Well she makes gifted children seem below average. She has taken intelligence tests for kids many years older and scores right off the scale. The school she goes to has only a handful of students and in some cases their parents have moved to be closer to the school."

With emphasis she stated, "Chrissy is not just bloody bright, she is a genuine one in a million."

I was struggling to take it all in and asked in wonderment, "You mean she's a genius?"

"For want of a better word then yes. Although how that came about with you as a father is a mystery."

I bristled indignantly, "I'm intelligent."

"You used to be before you pickled your brain."

I ignored that and enquired, "Why are you getting so angry, this is good isn't it?"

Emma sighed before answering, "Good some but not so good lots. Can you imagine what it was like having a four year old child who was more interested in documentaries than the Teletubbies? A five year old who thumbed through an encyclopaedia instead of a nursery rhyme book? A six year old who could finish the daily crossword faster than I could?"

She continued, "But let's talk about her problems and this is the sad part. I couldn't send her to a kindergarten so she's never grown up with children of her own age. She's got no friends except on social networks, probably in Japan or somewhere. In five or six years she should start getting boyfriends but how is she ever going find one her own age that she can talk to?"

I stared at her in silence and while I was trying to digest all of it she added, "Incidentally I'll forgive you for not being fully aware because she does her best to hide it."

With some relief in her voice she continued, "However here is the good part; according to the normal pattern for children with her intellect she should be moody, uncooperative and withdrawn but by some miracle she's actually a very nice kid. But trying to keep her mentally occupied has been almost impossible because her brain absorbs knowledge like a sponge."

I decided to contribute with, "I'll teach her about flow mechanics."

"I wouldn't bother. She has always known what you do for a living and probably knows as much about it as you."

That was a point and I certainly didn't want to be embarrassed so I said, "What about languages? You said she was learning Spanish."

"Learned my Dear, among others. And don't attempt to play her at any game that requires skill. She taught herself to play chess so I took her to the local club and she whopped their champion."

I decided to come clean about the conversation with Chrissy. "Well I think she's working on a new project."

"Three in fact."

That surprised me and I enquired, "Three?"

"Your weight, your drinking and us."

"I'm doing something about my weight and how does she know I drink?"

"She probably googled, "Why does my Daddy always taste of mouth spray?"

I couldn't argue with that but I decided to take the plunge and ventured, "What about us then?"

"What do you mean, what about us?"

"Do you want to give it a go?"

Perhaps I hadn't put the suggestion in the most persuasive manner because she went berserk. With acid dripping from her fangs she snarled, "Do I want to give it a go? Is that the best you can do you unromantic pig? You're not inviting me for a bloody dance. No I do not want to give it a go and definitely not until you approach it like a gentleman."

I limped away to lick my wounds and retired to my room. After some serious thought I decided to have another attempt and resisted a trip to my car for fortification. As soon as I heard her go to her room I showered and splashed some aftershave lotion on my private parts. When my eyes had stopped watering I crept along the corridor to her bedroom. I had rehearsed some romantic things to say and after a couple of deep breaths I tapped on her door.

I received a curt, "What?"

Cautiously peering around the door I enquired, "May I come in?"

She was reading and looked up to ask, "Have you brought any flowers, champagne or chocolates?"

"No."

"Then fuck off."

I quietly closed the door and went back to my room.




Luxury Accommodation Ch. 03



******************************

On Sunday morning I stepped out of my bedroom to find Chrissy waiting and she tackled me before I could descend the stairs. She enquired in a whisper, "How did you get on? Did you go to her?"

I was ashamed and said, "Sorry Honey but I messed up and she kicked me out."

She was instantly comforting and said, "Don't despair, the male is often rejected but he never gives up and eventually the female will accept him."

I decided that it was time to have an enlightening chat with her and whispered, "Can we talk?" She nodded and we went into her room.

I started by saying, "First of all your mother has told me all about you and it was stupid of me not to have realised how clever you are."

She immediately looked unhappy and replied, "But I don't want to be different, I want to be the same as everyone else and have friends."

I tried to sound enthusiastic when I said, "Don't say that Honey, you have a wonderful gift and everything happens for a reason."

She replied, "Like Phoenixmasonary?"

"What the hell is that?"

She answered, "It's a branch of Freemasonry where they believe that everything...." She paused before continuing miserably, "Do you see my problem? These things just keep popping into my head and I can't stop it."

For a few seconds I wondered if it really was a gift after all but I had to reassure her. I hugged her close and said firmly, "Chrissy you are very special. When you are an adult you might be a famous scientist or physicist and perhaps help solve the world's energy problem or something. Have you thought about what you want to be when you grow up?"

"Yes, a pole dancer."

She was definitely as nutty as her mother and we giggled together before I said seriously, "By the way, can we straighten out some things about the mating ritual. You see Honey you're talking about animals but Mummy and I are humans so we're different."

She responded firmly, "No Daddy, you are still an animal but just with a bigger brain. That gives you freedom of choice but your basic instincts are still the same. I've been doing a lot of research and I've downloaded some instructions for you. There were lots to choose from and there are no naughty bits in this one."

She handed me a sheet of printed paper and I glanced at the heading which read, "How to seduce your wife." I pressed my lips together as I struggled to suppress a rising tide of hysteria. I knew if I laughed she would be hurt but I managed to keep a straight face. I said, "Thank you Darling and I'll read it later if I may." I kissed her forehead and left.

In the breakfast room Emma was already seated at the table. She was wearing an orange jump suit and looked stunningly fresh. She glanced up with, "Ah good morning Romeo."

I ignored that and said, "Good morning Emma, you are looking beautiful and sexy as always."

She couldn't ignore my compliment and responded with a gruff, "Thank you."

When a return compliment was not forthcoming I enquired, "And how am I looking?"

"Fat."

She was clearly in a difficult mood but I resisted the temptation to engage in childish repartee so I said as evenly as my annoyance would allow, "Yes I am overweight but I am doing something about it. I have no doubt that both you and Chrissy will continue to hound me although two against one isn't fair."

She responded, "Well I'm sure Banjo will support you because he is also fat."

"He'll be no help because he's gay."

She reacted indignantly with, "How dare you say he's gay, he's a very macho cat."

"He's got no nuts."

"That doesn't make him gay."

"He meows with a lisp."

She tried to maintain her aggressive attitude but I had got to her and she turned away to hide a giggle. When she regained control she turned back fiercely with, "Don't you dare ever say things like that about Banjo; he's all man and he loves you."

"I rest my case."

Chrissy walked in and headed for the fridge. She said breezily, "Don't mind me just carry on shouting at each other if that's the only way you can communicate."

We both fell silent and when she had grabbed something and walked towards the door she turned and stood with her feet apart and her fists on her hips as only young girls can do. She looked at each of us and then with a big sigh shook her head in despair before leaving the room.

I said, "I think we'd better cool it because it's upsetting her," and Emma nodded.

After breakfast I went to my room for a magazine and looked at the bathroom scales. I kicked off my shoes and despite being fully dressed I had lost five pounds and felt encouraged.

Then I remembered Chrissy's instructions. In case she tested me on them I decided to have a glance at the contents and found myself reading all of it. I soon became aware that after years of one-night stands, sometimes not even knowing the name of the female I was fucking, sex had become nothing more than getting my rocks off. I had completely lost the art of love-making and I resolved to do something about it.

I returned downstairs to find the duck food assembly line in full production. I turned to sneak out again but Chrissy called out, "No you don't Daddy, you're on rice today."

Thirty minutes later we were strolling to the park on a chilly sunny morning each with a bag of duck goodies. By the time the feeding ritual had concluded it was late morning and I decided that we should visit the pub. This time there was less opposition from Emma.

With an arm around each as we walked along I decided to put phase one of my romantic strategy into effect. I turned my attention to Emma and grabbed her face in my hands. She immediately squeaked, "What the hell are you doing?"

I replied, "I'm kissing you," and planted my lips fully onto hers. Chrissy clapped her hands in glee and an elderly couple passing by started to applaud. 

Emma was far from enthusiastic and instead of the response that I had hoped for I received a violent shove in the chest and we became abruptly disengaged. In disbelief she gasped, "Have you gone mad?"

I asked, "Don't you like me kissing you?"

She was squirming with embarrassment and replied, "Not in the middle of the high street you fool."

I responded loftily, "When a man desires to kiss a beautiful woman the location is irrelevant."

She was backing away from me nervously and said, "Chrissy have a word with your father because he's acting very strangely."

But Chrissy said excitedly, "Go for it Daddy."

In shock Emma responded, "You traitor, you're supposed to be on my side. Girls are supposed to stick together." But Chrissy and I held hands all the way to the pub with Emma trailing cautiously behind.

I ushered them to the same seat as before and despite Emma's pleas Chrissy refused to sit between us so she threatened to walk out if I didn't behave myself.

When I went for the drinks the barman looked at me hopefully but I ordered just a pint, a glass of wine and a soft drink. We had only the one round before returning home.

After lunch we settled contentedly in the lounge but it wasn't long before Chrissy arose and announced, "I'm going to my room now and I won't be down for a very long time. I will also have my earphones on so I won't be able to hear anything. If you want me you'll have to hammer on my door and shout." She looked meaningfully at me as she was leaving.

It made us both smile and I said, "I don't think we are going to be disturbed."

"Why, what did you have in mind?"

"I was thinking about sexually abusing you."

"I haven't been sexually abused in years."

I crossed to her chair and lifted her out of it and then draped her across my lap. I turned her face towards me and kissed her and it was our first genuine kiss since I had moved in. When we drew apart she had a puzzled smile and asked, "Why are you being so lovey-dovey all of a sudden?"

I wanted to say what was really in my mind but I chickened out. Instead I replied, "Because I am trying to be more romantic, don't you approve of the new me?"

"It's just that it's a bit of a shock to my system, especially when you assault me in the high street."

I eased up the hem of her dress and even through her panties I could feel that she was already wet. I murmured, "Your pussy has been expecting me."

She replied, "I've been walking around with damp knickers ever since you moved in. Your bloody pheromones are still as potent as ever."

She obligingly lifted her butt for me to ease them off and the acrid aroma from her excited pussy was intoxicating. I said, "You always smell so delicious when you are horny."

With a touch of impatience she replied, "Thank you, but could we have less chat and more abusing."

She parted her thighs invitingly and I slid my fingers into her drenched crevice and gently manipulated them. It elicited an immediate intake of breath and she gasped, "I'm going to come very quickly."

I said, "Well keep looking at me when you do because your expression always excites me."

My fingers drifted to the firm nodule of her clitoris and I moved them faster. She reacted with whimpers of pleasure and within a few seconds she gasped a desperate, "Here I come," and her arms tightened around my neck. She was staring into my face with wide open eyes but as her body bucked and twisted with excited pleasure she closed them and a harsh shuddering groan came from her open mouth.

As the exquisite sensations slowly faded she began to relax until she became limp in my arms. I kissed her gently but she was unaware of it. Eventually she recovered sufficiently to look at me with a sheepish smile and murmured, "Wow, I haven't had an orgasm like that for a long time."

Before I could halt the words I foolishly enquired, "So do you still masturbate?"

She immediately sat up and replied sharply, "Why, do you think I'm too old to do it? I'm not quite over the hill yet, I'm only in my forties not my nineties."

My mouth had let me down again and I tried to wriggle out by saying, "Don't be so sensitive, age has nothing to do with it. You're the sexiest female I've ever known. It's just that I hadn't thought about you doing it...." and I trailed off weakly.

With an accusing expression she slid off my lap and I thought I had ruined the afternoon but when she was on her knees she reached for my zipper. My cock was hard when she eased it out and her soft lips closed over it. First she took it in deeply and then with short quick insertions before withdrawing it from her mouth and rubbing it slowly with a tight grip.

She murmured, "I've missed you so much."

I replied dutifully, "I've missed you too."

She snapped, "I wasn't talking to you."

Her mouth and tongue continued to tease my stiff member until I said, "You'd better take it easy otherwise you're going to waste a good erection."

She replied, "Be quiet you insensitive pig, this is between your cock and me. And by the way, I will give my full support to help you lose weight but it won't apply to this part of your body."

I decided to stay silent and wondered if other couples ever made love under such precarious terms.

With a swift movement she peeled off her dress and I gazed in wonder at her naked body that was still unblemished despite the passing years. Her small firm breasts and slim waist made her look youthfully exciting.

I kicked of my lower garments and as she climbed on and straddled my lap she was staring defiantly into my eyes as if daring me to speak. Without haste she raised herself until her drenched fissure was poised above my cock and then sank slowly down to absorb it fully.

She seemed to have forgiven my earlier indiscretion when she put her lips to my ear and breathed softly, "Oh Chris it's wonderful to feel you inside me again, it's been such a long time."

I responded curtly, "Could we have less chat and more abusing."

She muttered, "You unromantic pig," but she began to fuck me with long slow insertions that progressively shortened as her excitement increased. Her whimpers became tiny shrieks and her movements increased in urgency until she cried a desperate, "I'm coming Darling." Her breath was hot against my face as she thrust herself violently onto my cock and as she climaxed with a harsh shuddering groan my seed spurted into her.

Slowly her ecstasy faded but she continued with slow twisting insertions as she attempted to extract the last vestige of pleasure from my still undiminished shaft. Eventually she subsided limply onto me and we both relaxed in satisfied contentment.

For a long time we remained silent in each other's arms until she uttered the magic words, "Do you fancy a cup of tea?"

I replied, "That would be nice and I'd better go and let Chrissy out of her cage." I went to my room for a quick sluice and then moved along to Chrissy's door and knocked loudly. It took a second hammering before it opened and her young face peered out at me with a questioning expression.

I enquired, "Why are you looking at me like that?"

She demanded eagerly, "Did you have any luck?"

I collapsed against a wall and convulsed with helpless laughter. She stared at me with a patient expression and waited for my hilarity to subside. Eventually I was able to splutter, "You can't ask questions like that, it's embarrassing."

She responded calmly, "Oh come on Daddy, you know I'm a lot older than eight. If it embarrasses you then let me put it another way; are you any nearer to sleeping in the same bedroom?"

I bent down and kissed her forehead with, "A hell of a lot nearer Honey."

She gave a fist pump and a passionate, "Yes."

We drank tea in the lounge with Chrissy constantly looking from one to the other of us with a satisfied smile. Regardless of her special qualities she still had the basic guile of a female and was steadily manipulating us until she was satisfied.

Until Chrissy went to bed the three of us played Monopoly and Emma cleaned us out. We remained and drank wine and beer while playing backgammon amid continual accusations of cheating.

Eventually it was time for us to retire and I wondered about the sleeping arrangements. I decided to play it cool and when I went to my room I sensed a fleeting moment of confusion from her. So I let Banjo in and then got into bed and waited.

Fifteen minutes passed and I was about to give up when the door crashed open and she stood framed in the entrance with her hands on her hips. She was wearing a baby doll nighty and an expression of frustrated annoyance. She growled, "All right you bastard get out of that fucking bed and into mine." She turned away but then came straight back with, "And Banjo is not invited."

After she left I kissed the top of his head and said, "Sorry Mate but I've got to go and make love to a beautiful woman. If you had any nuts you would understand."

I left the door open for him wander out and cautiously went along to Emma's. She was sitting up in bed with her arms folded and her expression was one of defiance. I had wrapped a towel around my waist to conceal my nudity and posing as seductively as a slightly overweight man is able I let it slip sensuously to the floor.

She immediately covered her eyes and exclaimed, "You are about as sexy as a hippo, for God's sake turn the light out."

Climbing onto the bed I crawled towards her making growling noises and she squeaked in fear and hid under the duvet. I had every intention of pretending to ravage her but when I pulled back the duvet and looked down I had a strange emotion. Her eyes were sparkling with laughter and her soft mouth was so inviting.

Lowered my head I gently caressed her lips with mine. Her writhing tongue snaked into my mouth and we looked into each other's eyes. She drew back and murmured, "Oh Chris it's so wonderful to have you back."

There were feelings and phrases tumbling through my mind in chaotic confusion but I couldn't grab the words as they hurtled by. All I could say was a weak, "It's great to be back."

I slid under the duvet and nestled beside her and it was the first time ever that we had shared a bed. All our previous lovemaking had always been in the lounge, the kitchen and anywhere except a bed.

I murmured, "This is a first."

She responded, "And it feels so strange. I don't even know if you snore."

I lifted her nighty and the nipples on her firm breasts were erect like tiny pink darts. I sucked each one gently and let my hand drift slowly down her tummy and then under the warm archway. As my fingers encountered her soft wet crease she sucked in her breath and her thighs widened invitingly.

Kissing my way slowly downwards I paused to wriggle my tongue on her tiny navel and then to gently tug her soft floss with my lips. She sighed and squirmed with pleasure throughout my journey. I climbed between her open legs and when I lowered my head to touch her tingling wet crevice with the tip of my tongue she uttered a tiny squeak.

My tongue wriggled in and around the drenched fissure and then moved to the firm nodule of her clitoris. As I gently nibbled it with my lips she gasped immediately, "I'm coming," and clasped her hands to my head. Her body stiffened and a rasping moan came from her open mouth.

I waited until she had relaxed and then crawled upwards until I was poised above her with my knees either side. I said, "You never used to come as quickly as that."

"It's probably because my pussy has been deprived of sex for so long it's become trigger happy."

I said, "Who cares anyway? I have a very large implement between my legs that needs to be inserted somewhere"

She ventured with an impish glint in her eyes, "Okay but do you think I should get on top?"

"Why?"

"Well I was wondering about the gravitational effect, only you used to be far less...," and she left the sentence unfinished.

I snapped, "Do you want to be fucked or spanked?"

"Fucked please, although we might consider the other option at a later occasion."

She guided my cock to the entrance of her impatient pussy and I slid in slowly. When I was fully inserted I lowered my head to kiss her gently. I drew back and she said in a surprised tone, "So much kissing, you used to just fuck me and then roll off. I really like the new romantic you."

I commenced with long deliberate strokes and as our excitement increased I slipped my hands under her buttocks and lifted her. She wrapped her legs around me and with her arms embracing my neck I held her suspended from the bed.

Her mouth was close to my ear when she demanded, "Fuck me hard Chris and use me like a whore, I want you to fuck my brains out."

Holding her like a plastic doll I violently pounded my cock into her sopping hole and she gasped, "Yes, fuck me with everything you've got."

I was growling like a wild beast and as my orgasm consumed me I drove my pulsating cock into her with deliberate savage thrusts as each jolt of delicious pain thrilled me.

Dripping sweat and breathing harshly I lowered her to the bed. She was on her back with her arms across her chest and I rolled off to lay beside her. We were both too exhausted to speak for a while but eventually I raised myself onto an elbow and looked down to her. She was aware of it and opened her eyes,

In wonderment I asked, "You used to be so naive and now you want to be fucked like a whore? Where did all this come from?"

"I've always fantasised about being a whore and I'm no longer ashamed to admit it."

"How very interesting, we must explore some more of your fantasies. So what do we do now, go to sleep?"

"Well we could cuddle first and pretend that we like each other."

I wrapped my arms around her slim warm body and she snuggled her face into my neck. I had fucked countless and often faceless women throughout the world but it was the first time after sex that I had held one in my arms in bed and it was a pleasant sensation.




Luxury Accommodation Ch. 03



We must have stayed like that all night because when I awoke I became aware of her carefully extricating herself from my arms. She whispered, "I'm sorry and I tried not to wake you but as you are awake, good morning Darling. Go back to sleep because it's six am and I have to get Chrissy ready for school."

She kissed me and then grabbed some clothes from a wardrobe and headed for the bathroom. I heard the shower hissing and hardly a few minutes passed before she emerged fully dressed. I gasped in amazement, "How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Look so stunning every morning without even trying. Women would kill to look like you, especially after a hard day's night."

She answered, "I sold my soul to the Devil, I'll see you later."

After she disappeared I wondered if I should take part in the activities. I thought perhaps I should and lurched out of bed to stagger into the bathroom. As I left the shower I remembered that my clothes were in the other bedroom so I wrapped a towel around me and cautiously peered out. The coast seemed clear but as I tiptoed quickly along the corridor Chrissy came out of her room.

I froze but she passed me with a brief, "Good morning Daddy," and timing it so that she was still within earshot I heard her mutter, "And I always thought that Moby-Dick was fiction."

Suitably attired I descended to join them for breakfast and whereas I was feeling low at such an early hour they were both alive with excited chatter. Although it still felt strange, not having a hangover every morning had activated some of my brain cells so I attempted to take part in their animated babble by asking, "What are you talking about?"

After a pause Chrissy replied, "A girl in my class who is only a few months older than me has just started to menstruate and we were discussing the physical and psychological effects that the event will have on me when it happens. What is your opinion?"

All I knew about periods was that it was an inconvenience that occurred on some sort of regular basis. I understood that women also regarded it as a bit of a nuisance.

They were both staring at me expectantly and I could feel my face getting hot with embarrassment. I stuttered hesitantly, "I think....er....it will probably be...."

They both exploded into giggles and Chrissy said, "Relax Daddy, we were discussing Friday night's Eastenders so go back to sleep." It was hopeless trying to compete with either of them.

Chrissy had left for school and Emma and I were sipping coffee when my phone chirped with a text. I looked at it and groaned, "Oh shit."

Emma asked anxiously, "What is it about?"

I replied, "I have to go back to Scotland and sort out the water tower. They built the fucking thing on the top of a hill and I warned them that the pump didn't have the guts to get the water up to it but they wouldn't listen to me, I'm only the expert."

"How long will you be gone?"

"Probably until the end of the week but don't worry I'll be back. Just say sorry to Chrissy and give her a big kiss."

******************************

When I cabbed it from the airport to the hotel and checked in it felt different. Instead of the desolate feeling that it was just another watering hole on a parched trek to nowhere, this time it was only an unwelcome diversion. For the first time in my life I knew where I wanted my journey to take me and it was to a warm and happy place where two people were waiting for me.

I headed for the bar but not with my usual intention. I settled onto a stool and the barman reached for a shot glass with, "Welcome back Sir, your usual?"

Cheerfully I replied, "No Innkeeper give me a flagon of your finest ale. Although I have journeyed far I intend to swill the dust from my mouth and nothing more." Five minutes later I left him looking puzzled.

Emma had already received my text, "Landed safely" and after dinner I phoned her. It was difficult having a conversation with two people simultaneously especially with one them shouting six inches from the mouthpiece, but it left me smiling.

The next four days were spent in a biting easterly wind supervising the dismantling of the wrong pump and the installation of the one that I had specified in the first place. When testing had been successfully completed I returned to my hotel room.

I lay on my bed and stared at the ceiling in deep thought for a long time. Then I went shopping.

******************************

On Saturday morning I collected my car and headed for home, and it was the first time since my teenage years that I had a home to head for. The excited welcome back that I received after only five days absence stirred emotions in me that I didn't know I possessed. 

It was after lunch when the three of us had settled comfortably in the lounge that I was struck down with a mysterious ailment.

I went to the bedroom to collect my small bag and returned to my chair with it resting on my lap. With a dramatic gesture I reached inside to produce my present for Chrissy and she squealed with excitement when I handed her the box containing the very latest tablet.

It was when I was about to deliver my second purchase that my health took a sudden turn for the worse. As I reached inside, my heart started to race and I had a feeling of dizziness. I was gripping the small box when I became aware that my arm was experiencing some sort of paralysis and I couldn't lift it out of the bag.

Both females were looking at me expectantly so I tried again. I still couldn't lift my arm so I did the next best thing. I snatched the bag away with my other hand to leave my right hand poised and holding the box. I managed to flip the lid open with my thumb and Emma stared with wide eyes at the content.

Her voice was a whisper when she asked, "Is that for me?"

My throat suddenly felt constricted and when I tried to say yes nothing came out so all I could do was nod my head. My heart was now pounding violently and I was overwhelmed with an inexplicable fear that I was going to die.

Still looking into the box Emma asked cautiously, "What is it for?"

I had rehearsed it many times on the flight home and also in my car driving from the airport but I still couldn't make a sound.

With more urgency Emma insisted, "Chris tell me, what is it for?"

I tried to speak but my vocal cords were strands of spaghetti. I made another attempt and with a huge effort I managed to whisper a halting, "Will....you...?" That was as far as I got before my tongue gave a lurch and died.

I knew then that I was seriously ill and I was terrified. My body was soaked with perspiration and I was panting desperately as I tried to suck air into my lungs. The worst part was that I had a crushing feeling of doom. As my life force slowly ebbed away I heard Emma's voice rising to a crescendo with a screeching, "Damn you Chris, just tell me what it's for."

I became aware that Chrissy was peering closely into my face and she said urgently, "Mummy be quiet, Daddy is experiencing fight or flight syndrome.

"What the hell does that mean?"

"He's having a panic attack."

Emma snarled, "He'll have a strangle attack if he doesn't finish that bloody question. You're the expert, slap his face or something."

Chrissy responded, "Mummy this is serious so go and sit down."

Slowly and carefully she said, "Daddy can you understand me? Nod your head if you can."

I was gasping for air but I managed a weak nod.

She continued in the same careful voice, "I know you're frightened but I promise that no one is going to hurt you."

Emma interrupted with a vicious, "Don't bet on that."

Chrissy ignored her and took my hands in hers. She continued gently, "I know you are scared but I promise you are safe with me. I'm going to make you feel better but first we have to get you breathing properly and we will do it together."

I was conscious that Emma was rampaging around the room screaming hysterically, "All he had to do was finish a simple question, it was not like he was going to ask me to donate a kidney or something."

Chrissy turned her head and snapped, "Mother get a grip, I can't handle both of you at the same time."

Once again in measured tones she said, "Okay Daddy let's get this breathing under control. I want you to breathe with me, can you manage that?"

I gave another gasping nod.

She commenced, "Now slowly breathe in....and now slowly breathe out. Again slowly in.... and now slowly out. Once more, slowly in.... and slowly out. Now can you do that by yourself?"

Gradually my world stopped spinning and I was no longer afraid that I was going to die. My heart slowed to just a rapid beat and I could swallow again. My breathing became only moderately laboured.

As I returned to normality I reached out and hugged Chrissy close to me with a whispered, "Thank you Darling I honestly thought I was going to die, it was horrible."

Emma had calmed down and stood in front of us with her hands on her hips. She snapped, "Is he back yet? Has he resumed human form and does he understand English."

Chrissy said reproachfully, "Please Mummy, Daddy has just been through a nasty experience."

"What about me? How do you think I feel having been asked only half a question?"

In a honey-coated voice she said sweetly, "Now then Chris Darling, just before you went all peculiar you started to ask me a question but you didn't finish it. What was the question going to be my Angel?"

I was now fully in control and having serious second thoughts. I reached for the box and shut the lid.

Haughtily I replied, "That unpleasant attack seems to have left me with a touch of amnesia and for the life of me I can't remember the question."

We glared at each other in defiance and the space between us crackled with tension. There was a serious danger that it might all have ended right there but for Chrissy.

She announced loudly and with passion, "As if I don't have my own personal problems I am cursed with two idiots for parents who avoid the truth by shouting and hurling insults at each other like hooligans. Why don't you both grow up and admit in a civilised manner that you love each other?"

We cringed in shame.

Scowling with exasperation she said, "I don't know why I am even bothering," but she was a child on a mission and I knew she wouldn't give up on us.

It was a relief when she climbed onto my lap and with her ear close to mine whispered urgently, "Now listen to me Daddy because this is important. I love you and do you love me?"

I whispered back, "I love you very much."

"Then please ask the question for me."

It was enough to melt anyone's heart and it swept aside my doubts and misgivings.

I knew exactly what I wanted to say so I gently pushed Chrissy off my lap and reached for the box again. I flipped open the lid and offered it to Emma.

Clearly and concisely I announced, "Emma even though you are sometimes an intolerant and annoying bitch, I love you and I have always loved you. Will you marry me and accept this ring as a symbol of our engagement."

She stared at me in silence for several seconds and then lowered herself carefully into a chair. She put her hand over her mouth and her eyes slowly filled with tears.

I said with a hint of impatience, "I'm waiting."

Chrissy warned quietly, "Take it easy Daddy."

Eventually Emma gathered herself and came quickly to my chair to fling herself onto my lap. She pressed her lips against mine before drawing back to ask, "Do you really mean it?"

"Every bloody word."

"Then I would very much like to become Mrs Atkins."

Chrissy announced briskly, "Good that's settled then. Now make space you two because I am absolutely exhausted. May I be bridesmaid?"

As I cuddled both of them I replied, "You are definitely on the short list."

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