16 comments/ 25985 views/ 12 favorites To Love And Not to Love By: Kalies Cara checked herself out in the mirror and smiled. She looked good. Okay. She looked beyond good. Her rich mahogany brown hair was straightened and styled to flow like liquid chocolate down to her waist. Her choice of cloth for the evening? Leather. Lots and lots of figure-hugging leather. She loved the way her favorite burgundy red leather top accentuated her 36C breasts and a toned 29-inch waist. She worked out like a beast for this figure. And while it has its downsides like needing everything to be tailored among other things, it does have one huge plus and that is Cara rocked out everywhere she goes, which inevitably drove her husband John crazy. With her 40-inch hip often encased in skinny leather pants like today, Cara is always the center of attention. At first, it was flattering, but now she doesn't really enjoy it. Is it fun to be hit on by attractive men in their 20s, 30s or 40s, who wants to buy her a fruity little drink and gawk at her breasts while pretending to listen to her yap about shoes, bags and cloth? Hell yeah! It is super fun to play the bimbo and pretend that she doesn't have an IQ of 153. Is it fun to be catcalled randomly in the middle of the street, harassed by people who doesn't understand a two-letter word called no and groped by men who think every hot chick is just asking to be raped? Not so much. Hell, she started taking Wing Chun and Krav Maga just to feel a little safer in her own skin. Cara sighed. She has this same argument with herself often. She used to be so normal. Her figure certainly did not attract this much attention when it was 42-37-40. Men certainly did not look at her twice when she tied her mousy brown hair in a bun and wore her plain old black geek glasses. Nobody ever offered to buy her a drink and no one gave her a second look. Except John. John loves her for who she really is, the smart, nerdy, off-the-chart wise-ass geek. Despite what she looked like now, she still identifies with the geeky Cara. She hasn't changed. She is still the same woman. Just in a new package. A package that she worked damn hard for, by the way. She thought about the hell of giving up her favorite cupcakes, pasta, lasagna, bread for skinny bland carrots, celeries and you know, the so-called healthy foods. It was for John. All for John, because she wanted to make John happy and perhaps a little for herself too. She was damn tired of being invisible. Well, you all sure sees me now. Cara shared a smile with her reflection in the mirror. John walked up from behind Cara and wrapped his arms around her waist. "What are you smiling about?" John asked as he placed an affectionate kiss on her cheek. Cara relaxed into John's arm and studied their reflections in the mirror. They looked like the odd couple. Average geeky guy with one hot girl. When they go out, men comment to her on how she needs an upgrade and how she need to be on the arm of a hot guy like themselves who will show her around town. Cara doesn't care. She knows how they think. Simpletons! John has so much more going on than they realize. In many ways, John is like the her before. If John applied himself, none of these idiots could compare. Cara smiled again at John. "Just thinking about the penis I will be fucking tonight." John tightened his arms around Cara for a second and Cara laughed inside. Ever since she started to lose weight and transform, John grew more and more possessive. He never says no, because Cara knows he cannot admit that he was wrong since it was his idea that she takes a lover. "I am so glad we found Jason. He is perfect. Smart, fit and seriously, those eight inches of cut meat." Cara gestured with her hands as she watched John's reaction in the mirror. Nothing? "And the way he places these little kisses on the back of my neck." Cara's body shivered at the thought as desire washed over her face. "So sensual. So erotic." John's face darkened in the mirror and Cara knew she hit a nerve. John is not one of those cuckolds who wants to watch his wife of three years get fucked by some 'perfect' stud. He can't watch her with another. If possible, John doesn't even want to know what Cara's lover looks like, what his name is and what he does with Cara. The 'perfect' Jason this. The 'perfect' Jason that. John knows that Cara does this on purpose and most times, he can handle her little games. But, no matter what mental games she plays, when her body shivers in his arms at the thought of another man... Especially one who looks at his wife with such love-stricken eyes. Cara may enjoy playing the bimbo sometimes, but she completely drops the act when it comes to her one true passion, astroparticle physics. And being a physics professor, Jason adores Cara's research on gravitational waves. "And he loves to tease me with touches along my inner thigh." Cara sighed as she felt a tremble in her pelvic area. "Ahh...The man has talents." "Oh, oh, oh, you know what is his dirty bed talk? Trillions of neutrinos pass through our bodies every second." Cara said in a childish excitement before giggling at the thought of neutrinos. John smiled bitterly. In so many ways, John really does not like Jason. First of all, he makes Cara laugh. Not like the way she laughs at men who hit on her at the bar. Jason appeals to Cara's very particular kind of nerdy humor. Something that used to be John's specialty. If that is not bad enough, Jason is in love with Cara. Cara has made a point for John to routinely meet Jason for this-is-my-husband-and-this-my-lover-so-lets-talk-physics lunches. Even John has to admit, begrudgingly, that Jason is smart and maybe even brilliant on days when John can be more subjective. Such days are rare and getting rarer though, after John caught Jason looking lovingly at Cara a few times. And Cara is oblivious sometimes. She still thinks and acts the way she always does, so she doesn't think about how special she is to certain men. When John brought up the topic last time, Cara laughed at the so-called love from men that hit on her at a bar. But Jason isn't one of those men. "...and then Jason said, 'Quark, quark, quark!'" Cara laughed and John held her shaking form in his arms. Perhaps, more than anything, John doesn't like Jason because Jason threatened John's place in Cara's heart. John was always confident that no matter what lovers Cara take on, she would always come back to him because he and Cara shared a special bond, a deep intellectual connection that few could come close to. The physical needs can be easily satisfied, but the intellectual needs is something much more different. So it didn't matter that Cara was seeking physical satisfactions elsewhere because only he could satisfy her intellectual needs. Except now he is watching a similar bond develop between Cara and Jason. "Anyhow. I better head out. Jason is taking me to the conservatory tonight before heading back to his place. Sergei is playing." Cara pecked John on the lips. As Cara waltzed out of John's arms, he grabbed her by the waist and pinned her to the wall. John kissed Cara like a mad man. There was little finesse but Cara loved it. She loved John's lose-it moments. John has always been the rational one. The one ruled by reason. The one who find arguing pointless. The one who thinks it is practical for Cara to take another lover because he doesn't want sex more than twice a week. So she did. She took one lover after another and ironically, through them, she found herself. She found herself desirable. She found herself loveable. She found herself sexy. She found herself empowered. And with each revelation, she became more confident in the woman she is. So what, she was fat. So what, she had mousy brown hair. So what, her husband had sex with her dutifully only twice a week. Everything can change if you want it bad enough. So she gave up carbs, joined sports club, studied martial arts and got herself a whole new wardrobe. So she went to the most expensive salon in town and dye her hair a rich dark chocolate brown with ombre highlights. So she had sex with men other than her husband. And now he treats her like she is his treasure, the one he can't live without. John broke the kiss and looked at Cara with her lips swollen and eyes dazed. He wanted to take her back to their bedroom, strip her of the cloths she picked out for her date with Jason, clean her of the makeup that she put on for another man and have her look at him the way she used to. Starry eyes, shy smiles and slow kisses. Don't get him wrong. John loves Cara the way she is now. Sexy, confident and utterly seductive. When she looks at him, she smiles like she has a secret plan for him. When she laughs, she does so with her whole body. When she teases him, her eyes twinkle mischieviously. To put it simply, she enthralls him. Him and every men around her. The doorbell rang and Cara's eyes cleared. She looked at John, then toward outside and back at John again. John didn't move an inch. "Honey?" Cara asked. After another couple of minutes, the doorbell rang again. John still made no effort to move. Cara looked at John. He was looking at her, but did it register that Jason is probably at the door? Cara tip toed and kissed John on the side of his cheeks. "Baby?" John looked at Cara. She was looking at him like she used to. Warm. Loving. With a slight smile on her lips that is as graceful as it is elegant. "I think Jason is at the door. Do you want me to go tonight?" Cara asked. She had looked forward to tonight's date. The Conservatory of Music was hosting a competition for music students to present chamber works for strings. Sergei, the prodigy she sponsors, is also playing. However, she is worried about John. Nothing matters more than John. John nodded. Tonight was the Conservatory of Music's student competition for strings. Cara has been raving about tonight for weeks. She wants to go. "Go. I am fine." John said with a smile at Cara. Cara tilted her head slightly to the side, a gesture that John knew meant are you sure. Cara, his sweet Cara. Always the same. Yet not quite the same. John petted Cara on the head like she was a cat. Cara used to love it and by the smile that appeared on her face, she still loves it. "Go. Have fun." John said as he lowered his arms. Cara placed a kiss on each of his cheeks in thanks before springing toward the door. John watched as Cara left the room and opened the door for Jason. For a college physics professor, Jason looked good. He works in a teaching institution so his workload isn't as intense as a researcher. And Jason loved to spend his free time in the school track field and swimming pool. He was lean in comparison to John, who was fit but too many hours in a chair can give anyone a slight belly. Jason dressed fashionably tonight. He wore a charcoal grey suit jacket over white striped shirt with dark wash jeans. Cara whistled. The man looked good enough to eat. Jason smiled wide at Cara's whistle. "Hi Cara." "Hello handsome!" Cara said with great emphasis on the word 'handsome.' "You look very sexy yourself tonight as well." Jason commented as he took her hand and kissed it. Cara flustered and blushed. "Stop! Unless you wants me wet before the first string even starts." Cara flirted. Instead of letting her go, Jason turned her hand around and kissed the inside of her wrist. Cara shivered and almost tugged her hand away if Jason was not holding onto it. John watched the scene between Cara and Jason with clenched fists. He didn't know. He didn't know that Cara had a sensitive spot over the inside of her wrist. He didn't know until Jason, Cara's lover showed him that Cara had such a spot. Why didn't he know his own wife would shiver from a single kiss to her wrist? Because he never did it. He never kissed every inch of her body, looking for her sensitive spots. In three years of their marriage, he never took the time to find out what made Cara shiver, shudder and moan. Sex was always just sex, this physical thing that Cara wants and teases out of him. Sometimes, it is in the way she smiles. Sometimes, it is in the way she talks. Sometimes, it is in the way she touches him. She was always inviting him, tempting him with sex and he gave it to her. Twice a week. He didn't know until Cara suggested that they try something different that sex could be fun. He didn't know that when Cara whispered all the dirty little things she is going to do to him, he could be so turned on. He didn't know that his beautiful, smart and sexy Cara would look even more magnificent when she rides him on top with her breasts bouncing with each moan out of her perfect lips. And then there is the question in his head that keeps him up at night. How many men did Cara screw before she tried this or that with him? How many men touched and licked Cara's soft and flawless skin? How many men knew Cara's sensitive spots before he did, even though he was Cara's first? John couldn't think about that. He watched as Cara waved him goodbye and left with Jason for their date night. Is it going to be another sleepless night? He can't remember when he started to lose sleep on the nights Cara went to sleep with other men. As soon as Cara stepped outside her apartment and closed the door, Jason swept her into a passionate kiss. Being she was just kissing John five minute ago, Cara couldn't help but to compare the two, something she normally refuses to do. Comparing lovers is the first step to become dissatisfied. Dissatisfaction breeds resentment. Resentment poisons relationship. But still, she couldn't help but to compare. Jason's kisses are that of a tender lover, sometimes slow, sometimes affectionate, sometimes desiring. John, on the other hand, used to kiss like a robot, a peck on the lips here and a peck to the cheeks there. Going through the motion of it without putting any feelings into them. That was what drove Cara ultimately to find another lover. As the old song goes, if you want to know if he loves you so, it is in his kiss. And John's kisses said only one thing. He didn't love her. John loved her intelligence. He loved the way they could talk about anything in the world intelligibly and it is a great bond between them, but Cara always wanted love. Cara knew John wasn't the kind to say sweet and honeyed words like 'You are the love of my life', 'I can't live without you,' or a simple 'I love you.' But she had thought he loved her nevertheless. When he asked her to marry him, she had took it for an indirect declaration of love. But it wasn't. John loved her intelligence more than her person. Perhaps it is petty to think what part of her does John love when she is a whole package. Her intelligence is no more separable from her than her desire to be loved. But something had changed. Now when John kisses her, he kisses her like a mad man. If he showed no emotion before in his kisses, there is definitely something there now. Possessiveness. Desperation. Love. "I am hurt, Cara. You are distracted." Jason commented and Cara snapped out of her thoughts. She stuck her tongue out childishly and Jason laughed. In many ways, Jason is the perfect lover. He is intelligent, without a doubt. A romantic outside the bedroom and a guaranteed pleasure giver inside it. Cara smiled. "Let me make it up to you." Cara put her hands on Jason's chest and pressed her lips to his. He leaned forward and she leaned back. "Uh uh. My kiss." Jason leaned back with a chuckle and Cara leaned forward again. She brushed her lips against his before kissing his bottom lip and upper lip separately. Playfully, she teased his for entrance. Yet when his gave hers access, she took a step back to licking his lips like it was cotton candy. A bite here, a lick there, hmm... missed a spot. Jason tightened his arms around Cara's waist. The little minx wasn't kissing. She was playing. And damn if it wasn't sexy. "Cara." Jason whispered with his lips still brushing against her. "If you keep this up, I am going to take you back to my apartment and skip the conservatory performance." Cara stopped pointedly and gave Jason a teasing glare. "Well then, no more kissing for you tonight." Cara said with a slight pout. Jason laughed. It is often inaccurate to call a woman in her early thirties cute, but cute is exactly what Cara is. Completely unpretentious, she doesn't care if she act playfully from time to time. She does as she pleases with completely confidence in herself that is so intoxicatingly sexy to Jason. Jason knew better than to take Cara seriously. He pulled her toward him and kissed her again on the lips just to prove he could. Cara made a face and they both laughed. The sound echoed in the empty hallway and Cara gave Jason a teasing slap on the arms. "You are going to get me in trouble with my neighbors." Cara growled. "Well then I do believe it is best that we escape the scene of the crime now." Jason said as he offered her his arm. Cara blushed like she always does when Jason offer her his arms. Such a gentleman outside and such a devil inside. She shook her head at Jason's duplicity and placed her hand on his arm. The ride to the conservatory would have been quiet. Except Cara gushed excitingly about some of the students that were performing tonight. Sergei, Jason learned, is one of the most talented young violinists Cara has ever seen or heard. Sergei just turned eighteen last month and Cara believes he is going to go on to a most promising career. As his sponsor, Cara is most proud of his accomplishments, including winning an international competition last year in Dubai. Jason listened to Cara as she continued on about Sergei. If he didn't know better, he would have thought Cara was talking about her own son. Her face completely lit up when she speaks of him. Sergei this. Sergei that. Jason can't stop but to think that Cara would make a wonderful mother. Smart, caring and evidently, so very proud of a prodigy under her wing. And of course, the son that Cara and John have would be brilliant. John was the perfect researcher. Brilliant and completely dedicated to his work. So much so that he neglected Cara. Cara never told Jason why she was taking a lover, but it is not hard to guess. John didn't give Cara the time and affection that she wanted and needed. And judging by the way Cara would fluster from the little things like kisses on the inside of her wrist, offering of his arm for her to take on a date or the way she blushes whenever he holds the door open for her, Jason concluded that Cara has been much neglected. Some women are so used to it, they think nothing of it, but Cara still reacts to these little things. If she was his... Jason started and stopped himself. That is a most dangerous thought to have, but still... Jason would feel less of a man if he didn't try to win the woman whom he has come to love. "Okay, now who is distracted?" Jason turned to see Cara looking at him with a smile. She looked beautiful with fleeing street lights flashing by. "Excusez moi, ma maîtresse en titre." Jason apologized with a kiss to her hand. "What does the latter part mean?" Cara asked with a slight tilt of her head. Jason has noted previously that she does it almost subconsciously whenever she come across something she doesn't understand. "It means 'my favorite mistress,'" Jason answered and watched Cara as she dug out her phone. "How do you spell it?" Jason spelled it for Cara and watched as she googled it. Here is one more lovable thing about Cara. She is endlessly curious. Jason smiled as he continued his watch. Finally, the cab stopped and they have arrived at the Conservatory of Music just in time as audience begin seating. The competition was well-organized and all the students very talented. Sergei, as Cara noted, was indeed one of the most gifted and Cara practically started crying when Sergei finished his piece to a standing ovation. To Love And Not to Love Cara excused herself briefly to go meet with Sergei after the competition. She was beyond proud and Sergei, evidently, was very happy to see Cara. "You played wonderfully. I think I wanted to cry." Cara said as she hugged Sergei. Sergei laughed. "Then you cry too easily, Cara." Cara laughed and congratulated Sergei again on a wonderful performance before making plans to catch up another day. Like their ride to the Conservatory, their ride back to Jason's apartment was filled with Cara talking excitedly about Sergei. "Cara, my dear," Jason interrupted, "please stop. You are making me so jealous right now that I want to learn the violin for you." Cara gave Jason a seductive look as she leaned forward toward Jason. "Would you really learn the violin for me?" I would do anything for you, Jason thought, but only nodded to her question. Pleased with Jason's answer, Cara moved closer and kissed Jason softly on the lips. Jason wrapped an arm around Cara and pulled her closer. Cara tilted to one side and Jason deepened the kiss. Cara's hand reached up to Jason's shoulder and ... The cab came to a stop. Cara and Jason broke their kiss and shared a smile. Cara watched as Jason paid for the cab and she watched as he held out his hand for her. She took it and with their fingers intertwined, they walked into Jason's apartment building. She nodded at the doorman after Jason and they kept quiet in the elevators. They were as normal as a couple in their thirties could be, coming back from a night out on the town. Cara tightened her grip on Jason's hand and Jason rubbed his thumb over her hand. The anticipation was building. Cara could hardly wait for them to continue where they stopped in the cab. She can't wait to kiss Jason again. She can't wait for Jason to wrap his arms around her again and she can't wait to be in his apartment where they could ditch the cloth and make some passionate love. Yes, love. Cara loves John, but even she can't deny that she was falling for Jason. For his easy smiles, for his gentlemanly gestures, for his quirky humor, for his feverish kisses and for the amazing sex they have. She can't deny that where her body went, her heart goes too. Especially when Jason loves her so. Cara is not blind. She knows that Jason loves her. She has seen the way Jason looks at her when he thinks she is not looking. More to the point, she has seen the way John looks at Jason when Jason is too occupied to notice. And that is a problem or more to the point, a ticking bomb kind of problem. Jason wasn't supposed to fall in love with her. Nor was she supposed to fall for him. And John wasn't supposed to get angry at Jason for falling for her or get possessive with Cara because she has someone on the side. All three of them did exactly what they were not supposed to do, and now, they have a problem. A problem that all three of them probably realized to some degree and now it is only a matter of seeing who is the first one to act on it. Jason opened the door and pulled Cara into his apartment. His mouth was on hers almost immediately. In two seconds, he had her pinned beneath him against the wall, where he could feel her soft and luscious breasts through layers of cloth pressed against his chest. He put one hand on her breast as he continued to ravage her mouth. She tasted like... Cara. Sophisticatedly sweet. One of a kind. She kissed him back with equal fervor as she pushed her chest into his hand. "Mmmmm." She moaned in his mouth as Jason grabbed her breast roughly. He did it again and she moaned out loud, breaking the kiss. Cara opened her eyes to looked at Jason. She couldn't see him very well, but she could tell he was looking at her too. The room was dark. Neither of them had bothered to switch on the light. Yet there is something wild and primal about kissing in the foyer, against the wall and forgetting to open the light. They both breathed heavily and Jason leaned in to sample her lips again. Slowly, he kissed her as if savoring her lips for the first time. "I am sorry," Jason apologized. "Let me do this right." Jason kissed Cara again before straightening and switched on the light. Cara braced herself for the sudden burst of light, but when she opened her eyes, Jason was standing to her side, blocking the light for her. Cara warmed inside. The ever-so-considerate Jason. She held out her hand to him and he took it. Cara smiled as she led Jason to his bedroom where they had made love numerous times. Jason watched as Cara led him to his bedroom. She turned around often to smile coyly at him as if checking to see if he is still enthralled by her. He wanted to tell her he was and is always spellbound to her, but that probably would trouble her more than relieve her. Jason is not an idiot. He knows his role in this relationship. He is the lover. The third person in a party of two. The extra. But that's the thing. Cara didn't make him feel like an extra. She made him feel like they had a real relationship. She made him feel that they could have a real relationship. Just the two of them. Jason watched as Cara led him to his bed. Slowly but sensuously, she kicked off her heels without taking her eyes off him for a second. When she bit her lips, he knew she wanted him. So he stepped up. Turning Cara around, Jason lifted Cara's liquid chocolate brown hair to the side. They felt like silk in his hand. Without another thought, he lifted the ends of her hair and brought it to his nose. It didn't smell like chocolate, he found out. It smelled like warm apple pie with a hint of cinnamon. "You smell like apple pie and cinnamon." So he commented. Cara chuckled. "Sounds yummy. I would want to eat me too." Jason stilled for a second at the image of eating Cara from her warm hot pussy and felt his cock twitch. The little minx. Jason proceeded to unzip her leather top. Inches and inches of smooth creamy skin were revealed. Peeling back the flap of her leather top, Jason kissed the back of her neck and felt her stiffen. If there is anything Jason has learned about Cara, it is that her neck is her most sensitive spot. A kiss there will give her the shiver. Two kisses there will quicken her breathing. Three kisses will earn a moan from those delectable lips. Anything more and Cara will positively melt. Speaking of which, Jason dropped three slow kisses on Cara's neck and Cara moaned as she arched her back. Jason leaned forward and lowered both Cara and himself to the bed. As he continues to unzip Cara's top, he dropped kisses along her back with every inch of newly revealed skin. Cara moaned and tensed under his every touch and kiss. When the top was unzipped completely, Jason undid the bra hooks before turning Cara around to lay on her back. Her eyes were hazy and her lips parted temptingly with every shallow breath she took. God, Jason wanted to fuck her right now. Instead, he kissed her lips and reached a hand into her panties. Hot, moist and wet. Cara moaned as Jason inserted a finger into her pussy. Moving it in and out, Jason watched as Cara moved her hips with his finger and pleasure stretched out over Cara's face. "Cara." Jason whispered and Cara turned around to look at him with desire in her eyes. Jason loved that look. Because he knew, in that moment, there is no one in Cara's mind except him. He is the only one Cara thinks about and wants. He kissed Cara again as his finger moved faster inside her. She moaned into his mouth and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Jason," Cara said as she broke the kiss, "I want you." Jason smiled for those magic words that he had waited all night to hear. He took his hand out of her panty and began to remove her leather pants. Not one to rush, he took in the sight of those lengthy toned legs inch by inch. "Jason." Cara complained impatiently and Jason shushed her. "Not yet." When the pants finally reached her ankles, Jason slipped them off her feet and began his trace back upward via the inside of Cara's legs. Slowly, he palmed the flesh beneath his hand as it traveled up. Like an artist, Jason studied the form and shape of Cara's legs. "Jason!" Cara cried and Jason turned to looked at her. He could tell from the way she looked at him that she wanted him. She wanted him bad. Jason loved moments like these when Cara wants only him and what he can give her. "Are you wet?" Jason asked and Cara bobbed her head. Cara was feeling damn frustrated. She can't help it. Jason has this way of touching her with just his hands that drives her insane. Slow and sensual that makes her whole body tingles. And wet. Very very wet. "I will have to check then." Jason said as he shifted and spread Cara's legs apart. Cara whimpered because she knew what is coming. Cara laid her head on the bed and stared at the ceiling. When she felt her panties being pushed to the side, she readied herself. Yet when Jason traced his tongue along the rim of her pussy lips, there was nothing she can do except to shiver in excitement. Jason kissed each of her pussy lips next, taking them into his mouth and sucked. Cara moaned out loud. Oh God... Cara could feel Jason suck on each lip and biting each from time to time. A hard bite might last only a second. A light bite led to pulling and stretching. Cara screamed and quickly put her hand in her mouth to prevent another. "You make the most beautiful sounds, Cara." Jason said between each bite. Cara's mouth dried. She licked her lips and was about to say something smart in return when Jason sucked on her clit. Cara bit into her hand as Jason continued to flick her clit with his tongue. Cara wanted to shift her legs but Jason kept them spread. "Uh uh. My kiss." Jason echoed Cara's earlier words before going back to exploring her pussy lips. "So wet, my dear." Cara blushed at Jason's commentary on her state of arousal. "Jason. Shut up." Cara said, embarrassed and turned on. "Why? When you get so wet when I tell you so." Jason stuck a finger into Cara's pussy and scraped. He then lifted his finger to Cara. "See?" Cara opened her eyes and saw Jason's index finger encased by something slick and glossy. It was a blend of clear and white substances. Cara blushed. "This is so hot. I have never seen this on any woman besides you. Period." Cara wanted to stick a foot into Jason's mouth. Can't he see she is embarrassed enough as it is? "You are one of a kind, my dear." Jason said as he looked at Cara while lifting his hand to his mouth and sucked out Cara's love juice. Oh crap, Cara thought as she felt her insides shuddered. She didn't need to look. She knew she just got even wetter from watching Jason tasting her. Damn the man! Jason tasted Cara's love juice and savored it. It was velvety and rich like melted chocolate. Jason looked down at Cara as she stared at him, all starry eyed with disbelief. The little minx. No matter how many time he does this, she always give him this look. The look that makes him want to fuck her very very hard. Jason reached for his belt and tied it around Cara's wrists. Cara's eye widened but she didn't struggle. She has known Jason for almost a year now, been his lover for eight months. She knows that he would never hurt her. Jason got off Cara and took off his shirt and pants. The undershirt and boxers went next. Cara looked her fill. God, the man is beautiful with lean sinewy corded muscles on his arms and legs and a fit six-pack in his torso. Jason's midnight black hair gleamed under the light. Up there and down here. Cara licked her lips. She always did have a thing for men with dark hair. John, with his sandy blonde hair, was an exception. Frankly, she still can't believe she married a man with blonde hair. Not that it matters, because John was the man she married and she loves him with all his faults and quirk. Not that being blonde is a fault or a quirk. Just different from what she expected. With ease and familiarity, Jason spread Cara's legs open and positioned himself. She moaned. Rubbing his head at her entrance, Jason knew Cara loved this part. Being teased repeatedly without actual penetration. He brushed the tip of his penis along her wet pussy lips and pushed slightly, not enough to be in, but enough to make Cara feel how hard he is for her. "Jason." Cara begged. "Give it to me." Jason pulled back and rubbed his thumb over her clitoris. Cara rolled her head back in pleasure. "Ahhhh!" She screamed. Keeping his thumb over her clit, Jason pushed the tip of his penis into Cara's puffy and wet folds. Cara moved her hips to meet him, but Jason stopped. Cara moved her hips again, but nothing. "Jason." Cara begged. For the millionth time since he met Cara, Jason wondered whether or not he has a sadistic side because he loved to torture Cara. He especially loves to tease her with his cock when she is begging him to fuck her. "Be a good girl, Cara, and wait." Cara stopped obediently and relaxed. Jason has never shown her this side in bed, but she knew he can get like this sometimes on a date. There is nothing she can do to persuade him to give her what she wants when he is in a mood like this. It is best to stop asking and perhaps he might give her what she wants faster. Jason watched as Cara stopped. Good girl. Quickly, he rubbed at her clit fast and watched Cara tense up. The second she arched her back, Jason pressed down on her clitoris and rammed his cock inside her. Cara moaned out loud and Jason kissed her, feeling her breath in his mouth and her pussy wrapped tightly around his penis. God, she is tight. So hot and tight. Jason pressed his penis deeper inside Cara. He waited until Cara stopped tensing before burying his head between her neck and kissing her there. Cara tilted her head to one side in pleasure and Jason could feel the effect of each kiss around his penis. Whenever he placed a kiss along Cara's neck, the inside of her pussy would clench around his penis. If that was not a sign, Cara also does this wonderful 'O' expression whenever he kisses her neck, in and out of bed. Jason popped himself up on his arms and withdrew himself from Cara slowly. He loved this part, watching Cara in her breathlessness react to every movement his cock makes inside her. Today, Cara licked her lips and bit her lips as he withdrew from her inch by inch. When just the head of his penis is left inside, he slammed it back into Cara. If there is such a thing as death by pleasure, Cara felt it. Jason was taking his sweet time tormenting her, doing everything he knew she likes and driving her insane with it. Sometimes, Cara wished that Jason would just give her the satisfaction of fucking her hard, but no. Jason enjoyed making Cara want more. Always more. And that is a dangerous thing. During times like this, Cara felt as if she loved Jason and that she could love only Jason. As Jason started to move inside Cara, she began to relax and enjoy the sensations of skin slapping against skin and penis slamming into her womb. It is not a comfortable feeling. In fact, it hurts the first couple of time when she had sex with Jason, but eventually she learned to love it. She loves this feeling that they are deeply connected. Jason stopped and look at Cara. She was enjoying it, good. Moving on. Jason positioned Cara on her sides and placed her leg around his waist before burying himself to the hilt in Cara. God, it felt good. At this angle, Cara feels even tighter around the head of his penis. Jason began to move in-out, in-out again. Cara moaned as Jason fucked her from the pretzel position. Not her favorite, but Jason like to touch her very round ass when he does it. Jason felt Cara's ass in his hand. Round, so round and firm. Jason knew Cara worked out like crazy for the body she has now. Unlike some women, Cara wasn't born with a model figure, so she worked out hard. And Cara is damn proud of what she had accomplished in shaping her body this way. Jason highly appreciated her efforts as he felt her shapely bottom. Without a warning, Jason slapped Cara's ass. Cara's body tensed and Jason felt it. That clenching from inside. God, this woman... Jason slapped Cara's ass again. Cara moaned in protestation but Jason knew better. Cara is enjoying the extra slaps. Cara didn't know what to think but she knew her body liked it. She grew more wet and her inside clenched Jason's penis with every slap. It wasn't hard. No, Jason definitely wasn't slapping her hard, but it was enough to be sensual and playful. Jason continued to slap Cara as he thrusted in and out of her from the sides. When Cara finally moaned in pleasure, Jason knew it was time to switch. Cara was a quick study. Stay in one position for too long and she might fall asleep. The little minx. Jason withdrew himself from Cara despite her protesting mumbles. He withdrew himself from Cara despite her protesting mumbles and lifted her by the waist until she got on all four. Jason smiled as he stared at Cara's backside and the ass that is presented to him. Slightly red from his previous slapping, Jason reached out and felt the flaming flesh. His hands roamed over the shapely form of Cara's bottom before shifting down to feel Cara's pussy. It is wet. Actually, very wet. He wouldn't be surprised if Cara's love juice was now dripping onto his sheets. Alas, the little sacrifices for love. Jason positioned himself and reached for Cara's hips. He pushed forward simultaneously as his hands pulled her back toward him. "Ahhh..." Cara moaned. Jason didn't stop this time. He continued to slam in and out of her. This was one of his favorite positions and one of Cara's as well. A great way to finish off. Jason continued at a steady pace until he felt his penis harden and pulse. He was close. He picked up the pace and he could tell Cara noticed too. She was now moaning out loud from the faster pace and the harder slams. He is going to cum. Cara screamed as she felt her inside clenched down on the hard penis and a sensation of deep relaxation and euphoria washed over her. She came and she came hard. God, that is satisfying. Jason was still fucking her from behind and she moved with him. Timing is always difficult. Only in stupid romance novels does people come at the same time. Synchronicity? Pffft. Now that she had came, she had more control as she squeezed her insides for Jason. She knew he was close judging by his pace and she knew he would enjoy the extra tightness and come faster. Cara tried to match her squeeze with his every thrust until finally, Jason grunted as Cara felt that familiar sensation of something being shot deep into her pussy. Cara sighed as she felt Jason relaxed and started to place little kisses along her back. Hmmm. That did feel good. Slowly, Cara lowered herself to the bed and Jason collapsed to her side. Wrapping his arm around the woman he has come to treasure, Jason kissed Cara on the forehead. They do do this rather well. Jason reached for Cara's hands and removed the belt he had put on them. There were just the slightest marks on them. Jason brought both wrists to his mouth and kissed them tenderly. "Thank you." Cara said with a smile. Jason didn't need to look. The smile was in the way she said her thanks. "Thank you." Jason said as he kissed Cara on the lips and brought the cover over their naked sweaty bodies. Cara smiled as Jason tugged the cover over her first and then himself. There is something about Jason that Cara can't help but fall in love with. He cared for her. He genuinely cared for her. Something she has not felt from another person since John. The kind of warmth and tenderness that Jason gave her made her happy. Truly happy. To Love And Not to Love And that is a problem. But not tonight. Tonight, she just wanted to enjoy the afterglow of their lovemaking and sleep. Jason looked at Cara's smiling face on his pillow. She enjoyed it. Their lovemaking. He enjoyed it as well. He loved the way she looked at him. He loved the way she just took his slaps. And he loved the way she trusted him to make her happy. It was good to love someone. "I love you, Cara." Cara opened her eyes and looked into Jason's dark blue ones. She opened her mouth but really, nothing came out. Jason smiled at her, ruefully. There is no question about it. Cara is not in love with him. "Cara, you don't have to say anything. I didn't say it..." "Jason. Shut up." Cara said with a glare. "Let me process this." Jason decidedly stopped talking and watched Cara as he waited for a response from Cara. He knew what is coming is most likely rejection, but he loves Cara. That is the truth and he owes it to himself to try, to win her and to make her happy. "I..." Cara started, but couldn't finish. What is she supposed to say? 'I love you, too'? It scared her for a second how easy that sentence almost came out. Cara realized then and there that she was wrong. She wasn't just falling for Jason. She loves him and now the problem that is a ticking bomb just started its countdown. She looked at Jason and reached out a hand to touch his cheek. If she had met him before John... No! She can't start to think like that. When she spoke her wedding vows, she damned well meant it. In sickness and in health, forsaking all other, til death do us apart. She never intended to take a lover, she never intended to fall for Jason and she sure as hell never intended to love Jason. Yet here she is. But she will not leave John. And she won't lie either. The truth will hurt, but this is going to hurt either way. "Jason. I love you, but I can't and won't leave John." Jason watched as Cara declared her love for him with possibly the saddest face he had ever seen on her and he knew then that she meant it. She loves him, but not as much as she loves John. Jason swallowed his discontent down. What did he expect? Did he really think that Cara would leave John for him? "Why? Because you met him first?" Jason joked bitterly. Cara hated the bitterness in Jason's tone and she hated that she was hurting him while they lay in the bed that they just made such intimate and great love in. "Frankly? Yes. Because I met John first. I can't entertain the thoughts of what would happen if I met you first or what would happen if I met the two of you at the same time. It is pointless. I met John first and with that, I gave him a part of me that is perhaps the most pure. The memories we made and the relationship we built because I met John first is not something I can forget. I can never forget. So yes, I can't be with you because I met John first and until he says he doesn't want me anymore, I am not going to leave him." Jason studied Cara. Her expression didn't change for a second. Her eyes never broke contact and her voice didn't waver. She meant exactly what she said. She is never going to leave John first, regardless of her feelings for him or any other man. Jason sighed. He wish she wasn't so determined. He wish that she had paused for just a second that she broke eye contact to think her next words or something. He wish she had given him a glimpse of hope that there is a chance for him to persuade her otherwise. Cara didn't. Not a chance. Jason smiled. She knows what she wants and she is determined on it. Aren't those two things what he loves about Cara? "John is a lucky, lucky man." Jason said at last and Cara broke a smile at the thought of John. "Yes, he is." All of a sudden, Cara missed John. She missed his stoic expressions that would soften at the sight of her. She missed his angry 'ughs' and 'grrs' whenever his research isn't going well. And she missed his lose-it moments when his desire for her is most prominent. She can't help but wonder what John is doing right now. Is he home sleeping or working on his research again til wee hours of the morning again? "Jason?" Cara called. "Yes, love?" Jason replied and Cara blushed at his new term of endearment. Now what is she supposed to say? Oh well, nothing that Jason doesn't know already. "I want to go home." Cara watched Jason as Jason studied her. At last, he reached out an arm and ruffled her hair. "Okay. Let's get you dressed." Jason took Cara home and watched as Cara practically ran out of the cab and into her building. Jason shook his head. A man knows when to try and when to admit that he just has no chance. He probably won't see Cara again after today. Cara opened the door to her apartment and stopped. John was sitting in one of the sofa chairs, staring into space and drinking wine. Perhaps because he had already finished a bottle, John didn't realize until a few seconds later that someone was opening his door. He stood up as soon as he saw Cara walk in . "Cara! Is everything ok?" Cara looked gorgeous but her hair was ruffled and her makeup had seen better times. So unlike Cara to not touch up and be perfect. John panicked at the thought that something had happened to Cara. Why is she coming back alone at... 4:42 AM in the morning? John was about to ask where the hell is Jason when he saw Cara ran toward him. He put the wine glass down as fast as possible to catch his flying bundle. Cara launched herself into John's arms and held on tight. He was up! He was up the entire time! John didn't sleep. He wasn't working on his precious research. He was up because he was waiting for her to come back home. How many times did she come back to find him awake and thought that he had just woke up early? How many times did John sit there through the night waiting for her to come back? She can't imagine. "I love you, John." She said as she kissed John feverishly. John had not a clue why Cara was back from her date with Jason in the middle of the night at some ungodly hour, but he rejoiced at hearing Cara telling him that she loves him again. He can't remember when was the last time Cara said she loves him. She used to say it so often. But when he would only kiss her in return, eventually she stopped. John looked up and saw Jason leaning against the doorframe, watching him and Cara. What the hell is going on? John broke the kiss and looked at Cara. She smiled at him with her eyes full of warmth and love. For a second, John had a deja vu. Cara had smiled like that after their first kiss. Starry eyed, she smiled like she was the happiest girl in the world. John couldn't help but to kiss Cara again. His sweet Cara. "Come in, Jason, and close the door please." The conversation to end Cara and Jason's extramarital arrangement went quickly. What is there to say? Ultimately, it was the lady's choice. Cara may love John and Jason both, but she loves John more. She won't leave him and that was that. And given Jason's feelings for her, it is best for them to stop seeing each other romantically or stop seeing each other altogether for a while. Tired with the emotional rollercoaster she has been on all night, Cara excused herself to change for bed. John and Jason watched her go and said nothing in her absence. When Cara came back out in her nightgown to say goodnight, both men took notice of the way she looked in her red silk slip with high slits. The minx! The temptress! As Cara left them again for her bed, the men shared a look of exasperation. What is a man to do with a woman like Cara? So oblivious and so sexy at the same time. They sat there in silence for a time, enjoying the new camaraderie built over loving the same woman as they finished John's bottle of wine. Perhaps some day, they can be friends. Perhaps some day, they can talk about physics, life and Cara. It really is hard to find someone who understands sometimes. A thud they heard from the bedroom and they both bolted up from their chairs to race to the room. Upon opening the door, John and Jason found Cara in bed with one arm spread to the nightstand and the alarm clock on the floor. She had also thrown the bed cover to the side. With her nightgown bundled at her waist, she was flashing the two men with her silk lace panties. John shook his head as he walked over to the bed and covered her with the comforter. He then walked back adjusted the temperature for the air conditioner before walking back to where Jason still stood. "If I had met her earlier..." Jason started in a wistful tone as he looked upon Cara's sleeping form. "You didn't." John said immediately. He can't think about the possibility of what would happen if Jason had met Cara before him or if Jason met Cara at the same time as him. Would Cara still choose him? "You really can't even go there, can you?" John gave Jason a look and said nothing. Jason didn't seem to mind. "You know I love her." John turned to glare at Jason. The guy has some balls to tell him that he is in love with his Cara. "Oh, would you stop that already and let me finish?' John said nothing. There is nothing for him to talk about with Jason if all he wants to say is that he is in love with Cara. "I love her." Jason continued, "and I know she loves me to some degree too. However, there is a clear difference between me and you. I want to be with her. You can't live without her." John turned around to look at Jason, startled by this sharp change in direction. Jason smiled. "And I, would never be stupid enough to let her sleep with another man if she was mine." "Had I met Cara first, you would never have the chance to know her. Think about that, John." Jason petted John on the shoulder and walked out. John watched as Jason walked out of the bedroom and headed for the door. John took one last look at Cara before walking out himself and closing the bedroom door behind him. "Thanks." John said as he walked Jason to the door. "Don't mention it. Just treat Cara well. She is one of a kind, our girl." Jason said he stepped outside the door. "I will and she is not ours. She is mine." Without another word from Jason, John slammed the door shut. Jason laughed outside in the hallway and John knew he acted immaturely with Jason. But God, that felt good. John had wanted to slam the door in Jason's face ever since the first time he came to pick Cara up for a date. John walked back to their bedroom quietly and stripped down to shirt and boxers. He stood by the bed for a moment before climbing in. There she is, sleeping on her side of the bed like she had never left it for a night. John wrapped an arm around Cara and kissed the back of her neck. Cara shifted. "I love you, Cara, always." "I love you too, John." -Thank you for reading. I would highly appreciate your vote and feedbacks. Check out my other stories.-