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Fool Me Twice

By: StangStar06



Hi folks, I'm not trying to tell any of you what to do. I'm only making a suggestion to save us some time. Those of you who don't believe in forgiveness should probably skip this one. Don't even bother reading it just move straight to the comments and write down how much you hated it and how you've read fifteen million stories that are exactly like it. For those of you who are still here, please read the notes at the end of the story. After reading the story you may be in for a surprise. This story was edited by but not the fault of the incredible Mikothebaby. I applaud her even more this time because she did a fantastic job even though she didn't like the story or the characters. 

* * * * * *

George Santayana: "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."

I guess the modern equivalent of this would be the movie "Groundhog day," where poor Bill Murray continually lives out the same fucked up day over and over again. Then in the middle we have of course Scotty's famous line from Star Trek: "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. The elderly man behind the counter looked perplexed as I spoke to him.

I'm sure by now you're wondering what the hell I'm babbling about, right? He nodded his head and adjusted his glasses. Okay listen to my story and you'll see the quandary I find myself in.

Just about three years ago, I stepped outside of a building after a great meeting with a potential new client. The meeting had gone well, better than well actually because I had also met a really nice woman at the meeting and she'd accepted my invitation to have drinks with me that evening.

Anyway, there I was with my head in the clouds. I'd been depressed for a while because only seven months before that date, my wife had sat me down for a talk.

"Daniel, I need to talk to you," she'd said. I smiled and took her hand but she pulled away from me. "I'm going to tell you something and you're not going to like it."

"What's wrong Lena?" I asked.

"There's no easy way to say this," she said. "I want a divorce."

At first I thought that I hadn't heard her correctly or that it was some kind of joke. Lena was always smiling and always playing practical jokes on me and everyone she knew and cared about.

"Okay, Honey. What's the punch line?" I asked. She looked me straight in the eye and suddenly I knew that she wasn't playing around this time. She had a kind of manic look in her eyes, like something was wrong with her. Lena and I had been married for six years. We had a great marriage and I loved her more than anyone else I could think of.

If I had to describe Lena, I guess I'd describe her as cute. She had brown hair that was short and swingy. Every time she moved her head that mop of hair fanned out and then settled back into place. She also had sparkling blue eyes and a sprinkling of freckles across both cheeks. Her lips were full and she had a sexy little mole just below the right side of her mouth.

Her body was petite, with small but perky breasts and an incredible ass. Her legs were just slightly thick but they were so curvy that you just immediately imagined yourself between them. Lena was my entire world wrapped up into one being and she knew it.

"Daniel, I love you too much to cheat on you, but I've met someone and...well, I want to be with him," she said.

I've always prided myself on being a man of reason and being slow to anger but that morning I just lost it. I kicked over the chair that I was sitting in and just walked out of the room. I didn't want to say anything to her.

I was just remembering how different she'd been the previous night when we'd had sex. She'd been far less enthusiastic than usual and I'd simply chalked it up to biorhythms or tiredness, but I realized then that she'd probably known even then that she was going to run this bullshit on me even then.

Her heart had belonged to this asshole a full twenty four hours previously, but she'd given me some kind of halfhearted mercy fuck for old-time's sake.

I got myself together and went back into the room. She sat there with a fearful expression on her face.

"I'm going to pack a few things," she said tentatively. "I'll come back tomorrow while you're at work. I'll drop off the divorce papers when they're ready."

"Just go!" I said.

"But don't you want to talk about..." she began.

"I don't want to talk to you period," I said.

"But what will we tell people?" she asked.

"The truth," I spat. "That my wife is a whore, who couldn't control her urges so she left me with no warning and destroyed a good marriage."

With the rising of my temper, both the volume and the anger in my voice were gaining intensity.

"Lena, just get the fuck out of my sight," I snapped. "Come back for your things tomorrow. Don't bring Mr. Wonderful to my apartment."

"Daniel, I'm sorry," she said. "None of this is your fault. It just happened."

"I won't be responsible for what else just happens if you don't get the fuck out of here," I hissed.

She got up and quickly left the apartment. The divorce papers came only a few days later. She hadn't asked for anything. She just wanted to be free of me.

Everyone we knew eventually figured it out although I didn't tell anyone. My mom and dad were no longer alive but my friends were very supportive. They assured me that I hadn't done anything wrong, but the doubts I had about myself weren't that easily put away. I spent a few nights trying to drink myself into an early grave. I was angry at the world and got into more than one fight that I could have and should have avoided.

Perhaps my most staunch supporters, strangely enough, were Lena's parents and her sister. Lena's mom called me as soon as she heard and asked me what was wrong with Lena. Her dad got on the phone next. He told me I should go over there, wherever there was, and kick that guy's ass and bring my woman home, kicking and screaming if necessary.

He was sure that she was on drugs or something. I reminded him that Lena wasn't on anything when she calmly sat down and told me that she was leaving and why. All I'd gain from his suggested course of action would be criminal charges. Kidnapping and assault charges were not on my agenda, but I thanked him for his opinion and promised to stay in touch.

Lena's sister, Kimberly, was a bigger version of Lena. Kim was more voluptuous and well...she was just bigger. I don't mean that she was fat. Kim was and is extremely attractive, but her personality was bigger too. Kim arrived less than a week after Lena left, determined to help me get over her sister.

She started out by cleaning the apartment from top to bottom and warning me not to let my useless depression change me. "Don't turn yourself into one of those bitter guys who lock themselves away in a grimy apartment and start hating all women because one stupid one hurt them, Okay?" she said.

I just nodded as she continued her pep talk. "You're a great guy, Dan," she said. "If Lena hadn't met you first, I'd have gone after you myself. I guess that would be kind of weird now though. We'd have to give it a few years before the thought of us being involved wouldn't make everyone cringe." I smiled and nodded at her. I tried to think of something to say while she continued yammering away.

Before I'd paid any attention to what she was saying, she calmly folded the rag she was using to dust my apartment and turned to me. "Do you want to fuck me now, or after we eat?" she asked. I was stunned. I thought at first that she was joking. But she unbuttoned her blouse revealing a black lacy bra that was filled with heavenly delights that Lena would never even hope to have. The blouse dropped to the floor and the bra followed while I was still trying to process what she was doing.

"I know what you're thinking," she said smiling. "You're really happy about the upgrades in the size and quality of the equipment and you're wondering why you waited this long to throw her ass out."

She pulled her jeans and panties down in one movement and revealed a bare shaved pussy, with a tiny winged heart tattoo just to the left and above it.

She backed over to my sofa gesturing for me to follow her. She leaned back on the cushions and spread her legs widely. "I've thought about doing this so many times," she said, her voice thick with lust. "Show me why my sister was always smiling until the day she got her head stuck too far up her ass for sense or reason to reach her brain."

At that moment, my sense of reason and decorum seemed to vanish as well. The fact that I'd been happily married to her sister less than seven days hence no longer mattered as I plunged my tongue as far into that juicy wet pussy as it could reach. Kim started thrashing around on the sofa and screamed loudly as pleasure overtook her.

A few moments later, she crawled on top of me and rode me like there was no tomorrow. As I looked up at her beautiful face, all thoughts of her sister vanished. There were marked differences between the sisters besides their dimensions. Where Lena was reserved and understated, Kim seemed to live her life like a beer commercial. She enjoyed each and every moment for its own sake. Lena was the kind of woman you made gentle love to. Kim was the woman who'd fuck you to within an inch of your life. 

For the next few weeks, I fucked Kim almost nightly. We never got tired of each other. If her period and my job sending me out of town hadn't conspired to separate us for a couple of weeks, things might have turned out very differently.

The separation helped to cool things off and let both of us see that we couldn't keep going at the pace forever.

There was no rancor or anger between us. We just realized that we both needed to explore and see what life had in store for us. Kim had helped me immeasurably though. She restored my faith in myself and made me realize that the problems I'd had with Lena were truly not of my doing.

I began dating again with a vengeance after that. Kim often called me though and we got together for a lot of steamy nights. Sometimes she'd call me when I already had a date.

"Dan, do you have plans for tonight?" she'd ask.

"Actually, I did," I'd answer.

"Well call her and tell her you can't make it," she'd say, with a tone in her voice that let me know just why I should.

"Why would I do that," I'd tease. Usually I was already looking up the number to cancel.

"Ask yourself two things Danny," she'd quip. "First, ask yourself, why are you dating this woman? Are you looking for a lifetime of commitment with her or just sex? Then secondly, ask yourself, is the sex with her guaranteed and is there even a ghost of a chance that she'll be as good in bed as I am. You know you'd rather fuck me. Then there's the fact that except for my silly assed sister, there isn't a woman alive that you love more than me."

"See you at seven," I'd say.

So, just over six months after Lena had walked out on me, events beyond my control made my happy second bachelorhood more complicated.

As I said, I'd stepped out of the building with that happy dumb assed smile on my face. I wasn't thinking past how my date would go when it happened. Just as I stepped to the curb, a short woman near me suddenly twisted her ankle as she stepped off of the curb. I think we all heard the nasty crack as her leg twisted under her. A car that had run the red light was barreling towards her as everyone else backed up onto the sidewalk. Without thinking, I reached down and scooped up the woman barely in time to avoid the car hitting her.

A nearby police officer jumped in front of the car and flagged it down. The driver, a teen-aged girl, had been texting and didn't realize what she had almost done.

The officer came over to me and the woman I'd just saved. "Are you alright ma'am?" he asked. "Oh my, you're pregnant. How far along are you?"

A voice I'd heard more times than I ever wanted to admit and never wanted to hear again answered him and I took a look at her for the first time.

Her face was distorted by the pain, but it was her without a doubt. I placed her down on the sidewalk near the officer while everyone else walked away as the light changed again. "Thank..." she began to say through her pain, then she burst out in tears as she recognized me.

"What's wrong?" asked the cop. "I've called for an ambulance. Are you in pain?"

"More than you'll ever know," she cried. "And my leg hurts too."

The cop spoke into his radio and after a few terse exchanges looked at us. "It's going to take a while for the ambulance to get here," he said. "Sir, you've already gone far above the call but could you possibly do one more thing?"

I looked at him, thinking he was going to ask me to stay with her until the ambulance arrived. I was, of course, wrong. "Do you have a car nearby? Could you drop this lady off at the nearest hospital's emergency room?"

"He has a very nice car," said Lena. "He drives a 2009 Mustang Shelby GT. But I doubt that he'd want me in it. But I can't go to the hospital without him anyway. I haven't even been able to get checkups for my baby."

The cop looked puzzled. "Do you two know each other?" he asked.

"He's my husband," she said sadly.

"EX-husband," I corrected. "Our divorce will be final in fifteen weeks and three days. We've been apart since she walked out on me for some guy with J. Geils syndrome."

"Isn't J. Geils that band from the eighties?" asked the cop. "They sang "Freeze Frame" and a bunch of other party type songs. What kind of syndrome do they have?"

"Her new husband has their lead singer's name apparently," I said. The cop scratched his head.

"Who was their lead singer?" he asked.

"A guy named "Magic Dick," I deadpanned.

"Ohhh!" moaned Lena in obvious pain. She looked at me as even more tears burst from her eyes.

"Look buddy, can't you just put that aside and drop her off?" asked the cop. "I know it's a lot to ask, especially under the circumstances. But you seem to be a decent guy. You were the only one who reached out to try to help her. The other people just tried to save themselves. I have to give that silly bitch that almost killed your wife and her baby a ticket and confiscate her car."

"EX-wife," I corrected through clenched teeth. "Emphasis on EX and if I'd known it was her, I wouldn't have tried to help her either."

"Ma'am, you said something about not being able to go to the hospital without him," said the cop.

"Until the end of the calendar year, I'm still covered under his health plan," she said. "Even though I didn't think I'd need to be. But I don't have any health cards to prove it. So unless he goes with me, they won't treat me," said Lena. She had a thin sheen of perspiration on her forehead and I could tell the pain was getting to her.

"They treat people with no insurance," said the cop. "They have to. It's the law."

"When we got divorced, I had a job," said Lena. "I also had some money in the bank. Daniel and I split our assets down the middle, so since he made more than I did, I actually ended up with some of his money. All of that was stolen from me, but because of my former income and the amount I received in my divorce settlement, I don't qualify for any kind of aid. I have literally no money and within a few days, I won't even have a place to stay."

"I'll drop her off at the hospital, if you carry her to my car in the parking lot over there," I said tersely.

"Daniel, you don't have to take me," said Lena sadly. "I know that after everything I did you have every right to hate me."

"Oh, I do, very much," I said. "I hate you far more than you could ever know. But I have things to do tonight and it just seem like dropping you off at a hospital is the quickest way to get back to what I was planning."

"Wow," she said sarcastically. "I remember a time when you wanted to spend every second possible with me."

"Yeah that was before I found out what a whore you are," I spat. "This isn't something I'm looking forward to, so if you'd rather arrange alternate transportation, I'm cool with it."

"Maybe this isn't a good idea," said the cop.

"Relax officer," said Lena. "He'd never hurt me, but if he did, I'd deserve it. I'm the one around here who usually fucks things up."

The cop lifted Lena and together we got her into the tiny confines of my Mustang. I noticed as we tucked her legs in, how big the swelling around her ankle was and realized that she had to be in more pain than she was letting on. Her foot dangled at an angle that just didn't seem right. Looking at her ankle canted in that ungainly position sent sympathetic pain shooting through my own legs.

During the trip there, she tried several times to start a conversation, but I refused to participate and finally told her that I was only interested in taking her to the hospital, nothing more. We spent the rest of the trip in silence.

When we got to the hospital, it didn't go as easily as I thought. There were forms to fill out and other forms I had to sign while they examined Lena. I kept trying to explain to them that Lena and I were not only not related, but we didn't even like each other.

I was thinking about punching the very next healthcare worker who asked me if Lena's baby was our first child. I doubted that any of them could understand the pain and the rage I felt. Having to stand there and fend off questions about my ex-wife, the former woman of my dreams was beyond painful. I didn't understand why she couldn't just call Mr. Wonderful and let him take it from here. Surely he had to be concerned for Lena's and his child's welfare.

But when you throw in the constant questions about the insult she carried in her womb, it was just torture.

Finally, they directed me to the room she was awaiting the results of her x-rays in.

She was lying in a bed with her foot up. I wanted to ask her why they hadn't just put her leg in a cast and sent her ass home. As I walked into the room, several people looked at me. The doctor walked over to me and smiled.

"Mr. Boone, your wife has several issues for us to deal with. I'm not even going to ask why with your insurance and the amount of money you make, she hasn't been seeing a doctor regularly. But from here on out we're going to see that the baby is healthy. Her condition is very manageable with medication. Now as to the ankle, well it's badly broken. We believe that her bones are very brittle because her diet is lacking in certain nutrients. The baby seems to be leeching what it needs from her system."

"Fixing the ankle will require surgery and then a cast for six to eight weeks afterward. We're also putting her on a special calcium supplement program and a diet to get her weight up to a healthy level. We're pumping her full of anti-inflammatory drugs to get the swelling in that ankle down before the surgery. We'll need you to fill out some forms about the surgery and the calcium supplements. Our dietician will talk to you about the things she should be eating. And of course there are some things you're going to need to know about taking care of her. "

He smiled at me and walked off to play video games or whatever it is that doctors do when no one is watching them.

"Why the fuck won't any of these people listen to me?" I said.

"Because they're so sure that they know everything that they sometimes forget the basic facts of a situation," said Lena. "They see me listed on your healthcare account, they see that we have the same last name and that's all they need to know. In their eyes, we're still married and we're having a baby."

"So why haven't you tried to explain it to them?" I asked.

"Danny, it's hard enough trying to get it through my own head and come to terms with it. If I can't believe it myself, then how am I supposed to explain it to anyone else?"


Fool Me Twice



High summer had rolled in without warning that year, and everything seemed lethargic under the hot noon sun. It was the stretch of year between Memorial and Labor Day, the perfect time for all things outdoors. The lake was filled with boats, which motored along noisily in the distance. Tanners stretched across the beaches, taking in the precious rays that poured down on them thanks to the cloudless sky. Evie and Sire could see it all from the small cliff view site they had come across when they rounded a bend on the trail they were taking. It was odd to see so many people in one place when they had been alone for most of the day. Perhaps it was colder down by the water, because no one seemed brave enough to take a hike in this heat except the two of them.

Where they were at now was an ideal resting place. It was a scenic view, and the park designers had known it. The trail was significantly wider for a few yards here, and the sparse greenery had been cleared to give a better view, though a short brick wall had been erected as a barricade between travelers and the actual cliff, after which there was a several-hundred-foot drop. There were a pair of benches for them to sit at here as well, and once Sire had taken His seat, He patted the wooden slats for her to sit as well.

"Are you tired?" he asked, noticing that there was sweat across her brow now that they were closer together. When they had been walking she had been noticeably a half-step behind Him, and He wasn't sure if it was out of deference or exhaustion.

"No not at all!" She replied, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. "It is kinda hot though. You, Sire?" She reached for their water bottle, handing it to him before taking a sip for herself.

He took a long drink before answering, "Not yet. If I remember correctly, once we go about another quarter-mile we'll have some dense tree cover to look forward to. That will cool things off." Sire had taken this way a couple of times before, but never with someone else in tow.

They stayed for a few more minutes and chatted while they recovered and rested their feet. The sun showed no signs of moving on the horizon, and He wanted to get going. They had to get to the summit and be back to his car before it got dark outside. The park rangers were finicky about people being on the trail past dusk these days. Wolves, they said.

Yeah. Those. He chuckled in his head. They had no idea.

Once they had walked for another ten minutes they came to the beginning of the forest. Light filtered listlessly through the trees as they entered, their leaves barely moving in the faint breeze. The farther they went in the more it dimmed, and soon the old growth was upon them. Roots cut through the trail, which now zig-zagged around the old Methuselahs. Under the cover of the canopy, the temperature dropped instantly several degrees, a welcome change from their earlier journey.

Evie walked slower now, watching every step. Even in the dark she could see well, so she did not watch out of fear of tripping. Instead she kept a lookout for the slugs and bugs that crawled around and made this place their home, carefully avoiding each one. She found the moss and mushrooms equally enthralling. Occasionally she would stop dead in her tracks to observe a particularly fascinating example of flora or fauna, pull the small sketchbook from the back pocket of her jeans, and jot down a quick drawing for identification later.

That was the thing about travelling in the woodlands with someone who loved them: they were constantly stopping and wondering about each little detail. It really slowed down the pace. Her child-like obsession was adorable, but for now they had other things to do.

"Com'on Evie!" He called once she had fallen too far behind for His liking, "We have to keep going."

"Oh, sorry." She apologized, shaking her head to free herself from the daze the forest had had her under. Rushing up to his side so they were walking step and step together, she held her head low in repentance, whining. The notebook she had been drawing in dangled sadly from the end of her fingers.

He stroked the top of her head, "Now now, don't be upset. Aren't you looking forward to your surprise?"

Her ears perked up, "Yes..." Though the tone of her tone sounded defeated, He could tell by the shift in the air between them that it had cheered her up. When He had mentioned wanting to go on a hike a while ago to one of His favorite spots she had instantly wanted to go along. Spending alone time with her Sire was a precious thing with the rest of their family in such close quarters and on top of that there was the promise of getting to practice her scientific illustrations.

There was one condition though she if she were going to be allowed to go: she had to be on her best behavior for a whole two weeks. If she were very good there might even be a little something extra in it for her too. Needless to say, she had been exemplary, not even bothering to ask what the bonus might be. Evie had learned that pestering meant losing whatever it was she was pestering about. All the better for Him, then.

The route wore on for many miles, each more wild than the last. They passed only one more couple on their two hours of ascent. Being Sunday, most of the people were now heading home to beat the traffic back into the city. Late afternoon would be evening soon, but luckily for them they only had another twenty minutes to go which left them plenty of time stop and enjoy their accomplishment before returning. It had been a wonderful day on the trail, and all the world seemed silent. Only the faint calls of gulls by the far away beach or the drill of an unseen woodpecker had broken the still air.

Of the two Sire was the more experienced hiker. He had been an avid outdoorsmen since childhood, spending weekends camping, fishing and hunting with His father. Though her family had a rustic side as well, she was less inclined to go on large group outings and preferred to spend her time in nature close to home. Despite the fact she had spent less time wandering about the mountains, she showed admirable endurance as they finished their trek, doing a fine job keeping up with her Sire.

They appeared to be at the crest now, as the landscape could be seen in all directions now that the mountainside had become bald once more. The top was nothing but a cluster of massive boulders, where those that had conquered the hill could revel in their hard work, have a snack and take pictures. "Is this it?" Evie asked, motioning to set down her pack on one of the rocks.

"No not quite yet. This way." He pointed with his eyes, calling for her to follow. Looking a bit startled, a glint of excitement in her eyes, she put the load back on once more and went over to him. On the opposite side of where they had walked from there was a small path meant for game. He approached it, looking around to make sure no one had seen them before going down it. It took only moments - then they were gone from sight.

The game trail was more untamed than even the heart of the forest they had been in before. No human walked here in the shadows, rocks and young roots threatening to trip those without sure footing. "Is this the secret?" Evie asked, stifling a giggle as He led her by the hand.

"Patience." He warned, "Or would you like to turn back now?" He flashed a look back at her, His irises flashing a tale-tell yellow that betrayed what He really was.

She stood there, mouth agape as she took in the sight. "Wow... this is amazing. How did you find this?"

"Oh, I just wandered through her one day. Before they made this a park a couple years ago, anyone could go through here if they had a little orienteering skill. Used to be a lot of deer that would come here to drink after the spring thaw. During the summer it's one of the sources for that lake we went by earlier." He answered, leaning back against an oak tree a few feet away.

What held Evie's attention was a creek, an ancient one that had been the escape route of rain and winter ice for many centuries. The bottom was sandy, long cleared of large boulders that might inhibit its fast flow, fed by a trickling waterfall that ran off the edges of a smooth marble bluff. Shimmering bedrock peeked at them from below the surface. It was not that deep or wide, perhaps a few feet across and shallow enough so that you could see the bottom. It was no Rio Grande, but that didn't make less worthy of attention. She wondered how many other realized it was here. It was His private place, and she felt honored to have been brought here with him.

Evie edged closer, dipping her toe into the icy meltwater after removing her boots and socks. It felt blissful after a day of difficult walking. Setting down her bag once more, she pulled out the lunch she had made for the two of them and offered Him a sandwich. They ate, enjoying the reprieve before they had to leave the glen.

Looking over to as they finished their meal, she asked, "Is it safe?"

He nodded. There were few places left where their kind could change in private and without fear. The rangers here had had a few reports of wolves in the past couple of months, but He had carefully selected this site so that the chances of anyone seeing them were slim to none. That had been part one of His surprise for her. She seemed satisfied that this little brook had been her gift, and on that count she had been mistaken.

Her face lit up like a jack-o-lantern, and she eagerly stood to take off her windbreaker, t-shirt and jeans and threw them by the tree. Only her panties and bra remained and she eyed him with a playful grin. She rolled her back, arms extending in a stretch as she half-howled, half-yawned. While her eyes were closed to yawn He got up to put a strong arm on her shoulder as he leaned in to whisper, "Take the rest off too."

There was something inherently sexual about being amongst nature for their kind. It was an escape from the throng of humanity, the choking fumes of gasoline and smog. To be released from that was a rush. A piece of them was missing whilst they were confined to office chairs, and being here gave that piece back to them. Here they could smell one another, hear the heartbeat of every living thing. To a human brain that didn't mean much, but to them it was like returning perfect sight or a lost limb. It was a return to the old ways when they were free to do as they pleased. The old ways, it happened, usually entailed a fair share of fighting and fucking.

Unhooking the strap of her bra, He got her underwear off for her before she kicked them over closer to her other clothing. He moved His shirt, pants and boxers, leaving the both of them completely in the nude. She turned around to face him, and he had only a split second to fully register the wily smirk that had taken over her face before she bolted.

"Ooh, that little bitch." He breathed. Of course, she was playing right into His hand, but that didn't matter. He knew her too well, and she had wrestled away from His grasp too many times to not be prepared. There was something about being naked that made her go from a loyal little subservient she-wolf to a challenging pup. Giving her a minute's worth of a head start, He returned to His backpack to grab a few items He had meant for the second part of her surprise.

Racing through the undergrowth, she vaulted over a fallen log, trying to put as much distance between herself and her Sire, never looking back. It would just slow her down. He was faster than she was and she knew that, so her agility was her only advantage. Scenting the air, she could not smell him yet, and she didn't know if that was a good thing or not. Had he not chased after her?

As she ran, she let more of the change take over her. The rings of her eyes changed from brown to amber, ears migrating northward on her head before turning into their normal wolf shape. Canines and nails became more pointed, vision and nose sharp. The most agonizing part, her spine stretching itself into a tail, limbs breaking themselves into their right shape, required a moment of rest. Once all was said and done, not even a biologist could tell the difference between her form and that of a normal wolf. When she was younger it had taken hours, but after years of discipline it took a sliver of that time, the agony compressing itself down into a few seconds.

She raised her muzzle to the air once more, filtering out the thousands of smells that now flooded her nostrils. Rot, damp leaves... a dead rabbit, several days past gone... nothing of note. No Sire. She knew His heady fragrance better than the smell of her own, and it was totally absent. She whined in confusion, squinting. Nothing. She circled back, wondering if she had angered Him and caused Him to leave. He had never been upset with her like that before, but there was a first time for everything.

Meanwhile he stood up to his dewclaws in the river, his smell hidden by the continuous flow that dragged it away and down to the lake. She wouldn't go too far from Him and He knew that. The pull of an Alpha's presence was too strong in wolf form for a member of the pack to stray more than a couple miles. He decided to stay put, His supplies hidden by a small alcove He had selected before getting into the water to alter his form. Now He had to wait for her to get bored and come back this way. It didn't take long.

The wind working with Him, she was spotted before He was. Like a shot from a pistol, He was off, posture a mix of anger and play as He approached. Half-shocked, half-relieved, she turn and ran the opposite direction back to where she had gone the first time around. Having been here before, He was not slowed down by the obstacles she had purposefully lain in His path.

Evie was glad of course that she hadn't been left her all alone in the forest, but she felt idiotic for believing that might have ever been the case. Now she tumbled, trying to desperately keep some distance between the two of them now that her advantage had been spoilt.

Deliberately, He herded her back to the spot where her true gift awaited. More than once she threatened to actually break free and get away from Him, but He always caught up. He was more experienced than she was at this, and the distance between them closed. His jaw reached out to snap at her heels, and she lifted her hind leg at just the right moment, pivoting to stand her ground. Whatever the situation might be, she was never the sort to just give in right away. Now they were nearly at the right spot, Sire's little cache just out of reach where she could not see it.

They danced, His tail held high in dominance as they exchanged blows to attempt to grapple with one another, neither one of them of them gaining meaningful purchase. Slowly, they each returned to their human forms, wrestling on the cold earth. The difference in their abilities were more obvious now as they raked one another with bared teeth and claws. He was on top of her, going to pin down by her shoulder blades as she bit deep into His forearm, hands reaching up to dig red streaks out of His biceps. He growled, taking no care not to bruise her as he slammed her into the earth, adrenaline pumping. The beat of her heart rang in His ears, singing to him. Both of theirs were beating wildly from the heat - both of passion and of the day.

Hissing with as much ire as she could muster, she struggled against his grip, unable to rock him away from her using her hips. Her legs not yet pinned, she yanked up a knee to get him in the solar plexus, using the momentum to topple him over as the breath left his lungs. Now she was on top, sitting squarely on his chest, putting her full weight directly on his diaphragm, holding down his wrists. The moment of dominance didn't last long, for he easily swung her away from him, reversing the situation.

"Do you know what happens to subordinates that challenge their Alpha and lose, hrm?" He asked, pinning her hands together with one of his, using the free hand to grope around for His supplies. "They get punished." He finished, fining the length of rope and using it to bind her.

She knew she was bested, showing her stomach and neck in submission, begging for a little mercy as her forelimbs were tied together, licking her Sire's lips as they passed by. She was helpless with his full weight on her body, and as He finished with the binding He took a nibble of His prize.

A nibble was putting it mildly. He accepted the offer of her neck, taking a deep bite from the side, sucking as she moaned, teeth threatening to break skin even as they fully returned to their pre-lupine state. His arms wrapped around her once more, digging His nails into her back, pressing His chest to hers. He took a deep breath and took in her scent, pheromones mixing with norepinephrine in his brain into an intoxicating combination. This tiny female was His, and she was not exempt from His will.

The need to submit flooded her head like a tidal wave crashing to shore when His scent and body became so close to her own. She had made her Sire, her Alpha, her mate, so mad at her. So mad. She didn't like it when Sire was mad. It was her job, her only job, to please him and make him happy again. A low whimper seeped from her lips. Sorry sorry sorry it said.

"And you were so good too... such a shame." He said, watching her wiggling body fall still as she fully accepted the fact that she had been conquered. With not an ounce of delicacy, He continued to bite her, traveling down her neck to her breasts and stomach, sharpened fingernails following, until His claim over her body was once again made clear. She bit down on her lower lip, taking the wounds, accepting her punishment. Like this he could devour her whole, skin her alive, like any other prey that had been caught in his trap. Her back arched he neared her stomach, groaning in pleasure. It was her weak spot. When His teeth left the red blossoms of bruises were already starting to form, lines of red cross-hatching her body. This was so much more than mere pain. Being shown her proper place by a ruthless Alpha aroused her in a wicked way, as the growing dampness between her legs proved.

He got up, crouching beside her as He pulled her up by her hair, "Now you have to make up for that bad behavior."

She nodded vigorously. Anything.

Once she had gotten herself into a sitting position, he stood up fully in front of her, directly her mouth to his awaiting cock. "Take it, bitch."

She got work right away, sucking his lip, running her tongue around it like an ice cream cone. She pinned her ears back as she looked up at Him, begging for Him to recognize how sorry she was as she pleasured Him. Gradually she took more of him into her mouth, bobbing Him into and out of her mouth faster and faster. She tongue stroked His underside in a come-hither motion, taking a few moments at the end to really savor his tip.

Evidently this what not what He was after. He put a hand to the back of her hair, forcing her to go down farther. And farther. And farther. Her whole cock shoved as deep inside mouth as she could manage, nearly touching the back of her throat, she sucked desperately, unable to use her hands to help her in any way.

"Mmm, like that. You're going to learn your lesson now aren't you?" He growled, a deep and low sound that resonated in his chest. She could feel it as she took him in her mouth, as He pushed her head the last few millimeters until all of His shaft was enveloped. He stayed at the depths of her maw until her gag reflex relaxed, allowing her to come back up for air. Greedily, she gulped in some air, messy face dripping with slaver. The freedom lasted but a moment, and once more she was forced down on Him.

She continued to work Him with her tongue and throat, uvula flirting with the head of His cock as He shoved, a fist knotted in her mane to control her every move. In and out he went, each time staying at her limits just a moment longer, relishing the ease at which He could please Himself using her body. The tempo picked up and Sire began to rumble with satisfaction, burying His nails into her scalp. He was getting closer now, bouncing her along His shift as hard and as fast as He pleased. Every once in a while she would look up to Him, making pleading eye contact with her Sire to register if He had yet been sated. She pursed her lips as she felt the familiar taste of pre-cum in her mouth, expecting to swallow the impending load. Instead at this was allowed to go free, saliva dripping from the corners of her mouth, frothing. Her work was far from over.




Fool Me Twice



He ordered, "Get on your hands and knees." Fully aware that both were scraped, aching from their tousle and hike today he decided to cut her bonds. Grabbing the small hunting knife he always kept on him from the recess where the rope had been, He severed them. She looked up at Him expectantly, unsure of what this meant, rubbing the burns that had started to form from where her bindings had been.

He laughed, "No, you aren't forgiven yet."

He mounted her from behind, teasing her vulva with His member, not yet entering her. Her snatch was already soaked, still turned on from their earlier fight. Her fingers ground into the dirt in expectation. Evie said nothing, but on the inside she was throbbing for him. Nothing else would make His position over her as obvious as taking His cum. Even her devotion to silent submission had its limits though, and when she could take no more of His mocking she began to push back against him, grinding, using everything but words to tell Him how much she wanted to serve His pleasure right now.

Rubbing against Him of her own volition was even too much, and for that she was rewarded with a bare-handed slap on her already tender ass. She yelped, baring her teeth against the shock. He leaned forward to whisper into her ear, "This little bitch thinks she wants to be fucked? Well, she'll be fucked alright."

Without warning, He rammed His oral-slicked cock into her. He held the back of her neck like a vice, thrusting. Rocking forward, she gripped for purchase as she was ridden without mercy. Taking Him so suddenly was hard but unbelievably pleasurable, her tight pussy gripping Him just as hard as He was holding her neck. Even though it felt like hell at first, she stretched to accommodate His girth, like a hand fitting into a perfectly-tailored glove.

For a time they just stayed close together, His dick prying open her gates ever wider until her cervix was reached. He pulled Himself out of her fully then, now ramming back in, over and over again, groaning with effort, His cock hard as a ramrod. Each moment was so full and satisfying, the wet smack of their sex reverberating in the otherwise dead-quiet forest. Sweat covered their bodies, now both of their lungs laboring. Which each thrust He intoned:

"You.

Will.

Obey.

Me."

"Yes!" She promised, "Yes!" His voice had taken on an especially dark quality, the sort one used with commands of the most serious order. Recalcitrance would not be tolerated. Obedience was her one and only choice. The familiar feeling of numbness spreading through her body as he angled himself to hit her g-spot directly. Her body was a tool for him, an instruction device to prove his status. She was happy to oblige.

Tingling, her limbs falling asleep, she fell to the ground, no longer able to support herself. She rested on her elbows, and His hold went from her neck to a quick yank on her hair, bringing her back up. She was not allowed to give up until they were finished, He snarled in warning.

The grasp went back, now to her shoulders, as He pushed as far inside her as He could. She started to shake, shivering with exhaustion. It felt so wonderful it left her agony. For now she dangled on the edge somewhere between passing out and exploding in orgasm. He had known just where to hit her, that extraordinary place inside her that made her whole body feel like gelatin when it was touched. He was not just touching her either. He full-on rammed into her, making stars pop behind her lids as they squeezed closed in ecstasy.

If He had not been doing so on purpose before, He sure as hell was doing it now. By the third time He poked against that spot she had begun to defenselessly moan, her mouth no longer controlled by her waking mind. Face as wild as a devil's, he continued, feeling a surge of power rush down his veins with every squeal.

No quarter was given. Her Alpha still needed to finish Himself, regardless of how tired she now was. Even if He had wanted to stop He no longer could, continuing to go in a rhythmic motion. Even though He wore human flesh that part of Him had been subsumed by the more primal needs of the wolf the moment He entered her.

It didn't take much longer after that for her to reach her limit. The feeling welled up inside her, a dam ready to burst, until she could no longer hold on. She howled as it racked through her body, knocking the last of her breath out of her. Unable to help herself, she came before Him, gushing against His cock just before it entered once more. The smell of feminine musk filled the air, and he knew without a doubt that she had been totally finished.

That had been the final push he had needed to come himself. The surge of orgasmic fluid that followed her completion was soon joined by his own, eliciting an aftershock of pleasure from Evie, who could barely keep herself from sinking to the ground once more. He rode each pulse of his orgasm inside her, letting his seed fill her totally until it slicked both their legs.

Now they collapsed together, exhausted. This time He held her, softly, stroking the top of her head as she nestled into the crook of his arm. She whimpered, no words left in her to ask anything.

"Yes," He said without needing to know the question, "You are my favorite little she-wolf again."

They stayed like that for a long time, curled up together like two puzzle pieces that had just been reunited. Slowly, with the more animalistic needs of their kind met, He felt the canine part of his soul fade to the background. They needed to leave before it got dark, but He had not the will to ask such a tired person to move again.

Silently, He picked her up, cradling her legs with one of His arms and her back and head with the other. Her eyes stayed closed, her chest rising and falling in the slow rhythm that signaled sleep. He brought her to the creek that they had visited before, setting down at the shore, kneeling Himself while keeping her head propped up. The water would be cold, but she had open cuts and bruises that needed to be washed.

In the most tender way he could manage, He said to her, "You have to stay awake just a little bit longer, okay Evie? Can you do that for me? I need to clean you up." Slowly her lids parted, chin nodding faintly before a yes escaped.

"Good girl." He complimented her, kissing her forehead before cupping His hands full of fresh water. He had set them down close to the place where the waterfall fed the stream. It would be the safest place to take water from as it was the least stagnant. It would have been better to use their own bottled water of course, but they didn't have much of that left.

Gently he washed her chest and neck, cleaning off the grime and dirt. He shimmed them closer towards the edge so that He could set her arms directly in the flow, leaning her back so that he could let it run over the rope burns on her wrists. She grimaced, but did not fight it. She knew it would hurt for the moment but it would make it better in the long run.

Now He turned her, pouring handfuls of water over her back, rubbing lightly over the scratches until He could be sure they were free of dirt. When He was sure she was as clean as he could get without some aloe vera and antiseptic, He picked her up once more so that He could put back on their clothes. It was a challenge and they both looked like they had just lost an arm-wrestling contest with a grizzly bear, but it would have to do.

With their lunch and snacks consumed and water sacks empty, he managed to compress their two packs into one, putting her smaller one inside his. He wore that backwards around his chest, using it as a counter-weight while he lifted her onto his back. She fixed her arms around his neck like a ragdoll, piggybacking down the mountain.

When she awoke later that night she was safe and sound in her own bed at home. A glass of water waited for her on her bedside table, condensation forming on the outside of the tumbler. He had left that for her several hours ago when He could no longer keep His own eyes open to watch her. She got up to take a sip before slipping back into the world of dreams, remembering their adventure from that day.



Fool Me Twice



"Why bother trying to explain the past to them?" I asked. "Just pick up a phone and get Magic Dick over here to watch over you and his baby?"

I felt like an ass as I watched her burst out crying. "You could always call your family then," I said. The tears continued unabated. If anything, they became even worse.

"Danny, my mom and dad don't want anything to do with me," she cried. "They haven't wanted to speak to me since I left you. You know how firmly set they are with their views on right and wrong."

"Lena, don't call me Danny or any of those pet names. My name is Daniel, and I'm sure your parents will come around. After all, the child you're carrying is probably going to be their only grandchild for a while," I said. "Things like that have a way of cutting through everything else."

"Danny...Daniel...I'm really afraid. I know that I have no right to ask it, but could you stay with me until. Well until the surgery is over?" she asked. There was a pleading tone in her voice and the look in her eyes told me all I needed to know. She really was afraid.

"Why the hell would I do that?" I asked. "Why would I even care about your fear or anything else? That isn't my job any more, remember? You replaced me a while back."

The hurt in her eyes got to me. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy the chance to twist the knife a bit. The ringing of my phone in my pocket put further communication on hold for a few moments at least.

"Danny, I haven't seen you in a week," said Kim over the phone. "What cha doin' t'night? I might need some dental work."

"Shit, does everyone want to use my health insurance?" I smiled.

"Not real dental work you sap," snapped Kim jokingly. "I have a cavity that needs to be filled, ya know?"

"I kind of have a date and a problem," I said, moving further away from the bed.

"Cancel the date, and tell me about the problem," she said. "You know the drill. Call your new girlfriend and tell her something...Family comes first. Now tell me about the problem."

"Maybe, you should see it for yourself. It might be your problem too," I said. I gave her the address and the room number and promised to stay put until she got there.

Lena just looked at me as I turned back to her. "Who was that?" she asked with a touch of bitterness in her voice.

"An old friend," I said. "She's someone who actually cares."

She just lay there in the bed looking at me while several nurses came in to check on one things or another. "Danny," she began. My icy glare cut her off.

"Daniel, I meant," she started again. "We never did have a chance to talk about..."

That was all I could take. "Why the fuck would I ever want to talk about it?" I erupted. The nurse in the room looked at me as if she was trying to decide whether or not to call security.

Kim walked into the room and looked around. When she saw me by the window she changed both her demeanor and her walk and headed straight for me. "Why the hell are you in a hospital? Don't tell me you're hanging out with a sick friend, right? That is so like you."

I pointed at the bed. Lena's pregnant belly all but obscured her face from where we were standing.

Kim looked over on the bed and recognized her sister. "What the hell happened to you?" she asked coldly. Then she looked over to me. "Please tell me you're not falling for this? I can only rescue you so many times. Don't you have a date tonight anyway?"

She just shook her head. "I can't believe this. I have to call mom and dad. I'll call you later brother." Then she left nearly as quickly as she came.

"See what I mean," said Lena from the bed. "Even the people who are supposed to be my family don't want anything to do with me."

I didn't know what to say to that so I just looked at her. She looked so different, yet still somehow the same. I mean physically, except for being pregnant, the average person would think she looked the way she did when she left me. But someone who knew her well would notice the differences. The sparkle in her eyes was gone. The sense of confidence that she viewed the world through was also gone. There were tiny bags under her eyes and the pop in her personality had gone away.

Everyone always talks about how pregnant women have this incredible glow, Lena didn't have it. It was like looking at a whipped dog that is about to drown in a huge vat of its own liquefied shit. Lena saw me as her only life preserver. I didn't know what to do. On one hand, I hated her as much as everyone else did. She deserved everything she was getting and more for what she'd done to me.

I could sympathize with her family because they were from an extremely religious background and what she'd done embarrassed her parents among their close knit church group. They were pretty much considered a failure as parents for raising "the whore."

On the other hand, call me weak or spineless, but I felt sorry for her. She'd gone from a vibrant and beautiful woman to this lifeless lump of shit in a very short time. Sure she'd hurt me pretty badly but I'd come through it and was doing pretty well. It looked like her antics had only hurt her. I was sure there was a story here somewhere. I just didn't care enough to hear it.

I stood there looking down at her with all of those thoughts going through my mind.

"Daniel, come over here so I can talk to you," she said. I turned to face her and walked a little closer to the bed. She smiled for the first time. And then she laughed a little, but I could tell that even smiling seemed to hurt her.

"Daniel, I'm not going to bite you," she said. "You could sit down on the edge of my bed. It's not like I'm going to try to hurt you." I did as she requested and felt strangely on edge. I couldn't understand why but there was this awful tension between us that had never been there before.

"Daniel, I understand why you hate me. And you probably should. I never thanked you for saving my life and the baby's life back there and I really should have, but I can't help thinking that maybe it would have been a blessing," she smiled kind of a wry smile.

She was so different from my Lena. My Lena believed in life no matter what. My Lena gave and made me give to the anti-abortion groups even though she was a staunch liberal. My Lena was like that little orphan girl who always sang about the sun coming out tomorrow. I wondered what had changed her into this sad excuse for a woman who'd just hinted that if I hadn't pulled her from in front of a car that she and her baby would be better off.

I realized then that as much as I hated her, there was no use kicking her, she was down as far as she could ever be.

"If it had happened," she continued. "All of our problems would be over." I looked at her as if she was insane.

"Danny, even with you allowing me to use your healthcare insurance, this is only going to put me even further into debt," she said. "It's a short term fix that will cost me even more in the long run."

"Lena, most of the forms I've been signing, make me responsible for any costs that health insurance doesn't pay. So when they discover that you can't pay it, the bills will come to me. So don't worry about it Lena. Consider it a parting gift from me to you and your child," I said.

"If I'm getting a gift, can I pick it?" she said. I looked at her strangely. I wondered what could be more important than taking care of the bill for the surgery she was about to go through.

"Danny, I'm scared," she blurted out through her tears and blubbering. "They're going to cut my leg open and do things to me. They're going to put a piece of metal inside of me to hold my bones in place. They've already told me that there's a chance that I'll walk with a limp for the rest of my life and the chances of re-damaging the joint are increased. I'm more afraid of this than I am of not being able to pay the bill."

"Danny, what I want more than anything else, since you seem to be in a giving mood is for you to just put what happened between us away for a little while and stay with me until they take me to surgery. The last nurse that came through here told me that it shouldn't take more than an hour or so. The swelling in my ankle is almost to the point where they'll be able to do the surgery without doing any additional tissue damage."

"Could you do that?" she asked. "Just sit down here and talk to me, so I'm less nervous about them cutting my body open and doing things to it. I know I treated you terribly and you didn't deserve it. If I live to be a thousand years old, what I did to you will always be the worst thing I've ever done and I don't deserve forgiveness. I'm not asking for you to forgive me, Danny, I'd just like for you to sit down and talk to me for a little while."

"There was a time when you loved me more than anything else on the planet. At least that's what you used to tell me. And I believed it when you said it so there had to be something to it. And I lo..."

"Stop," I said sharply. The acid in my tone alone cut her words off so quickly that the last word became a muffled mumbling in her throat. "Don't go there." She nodded and looked away from me. A solitary tear rolled down one cheek as she realized that she'd fucked up again and I was angrier at her after what she'd started to say than I had been before. After a few moments of very uncomfortable silence, I let myself exhale. It all came out as a nearly silent sigh and a lot of the new anger went with it.

"Don't ever say that to me again," I said. She nodded understanding exactly what I meant.

I pulled out my iPhone and went to my contacts screen. The ringing sound in my ear let me know that the call was going through. "Hi Melissa," I said sadly. "It's Dan. Well I'm at the hospital. I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to make it tonight. Someone I used to be very close to is having surgery so I'm going to be here for a while. I can understand it if you're angry at me but I really can't get away right now." There was an abrupt clicking sound as she hung up on me.

"Ouch," said Lena. "It sounds like she's pissed. She must have really wanted to go out with you. Sorry Danny. I mean Daniel." I just sighed again.

"So where's Mr. Wonderful anyway?" I asked. "Did you even call him?" Now it was her turn to sigh.

"We're not together," she said. "Do you want to hear about it?"

"Two words," I said. "Fuck and No."

"Then what shall we talk about?" she smiled. "Danny, could you sit a little closer to me? I swear to you that I will not bite you. I know, you find me disgusting and you hate me and all of that shit. But I'd like to pretend for just a few moments, that I hadn't fucked my life up."

I moved closer to her and she smiled. I guess when I moved close enough for her to touch me it emboldened her because she reached out to take my hand. "Lena, don't touch me," I hissed. The venom in my voice made her retract the hand immediately.

The pain in her voice was so thick I could feel it. "I thought that we were pretending that things were okay," she said.

"I'm not that good an actor," I spat. We sat there for a few moments in silence.

"Danny, if I can't touch you, I have another idea," she said suddenly. She was smiling bigger than she had since I'd run into her. She almost seemed like the Lena of old.

"Can I touch your jacket?" she asked. I nodded my head wondering what the fuck she was planning.

"Close your eyes," she gushed. I did as she requested and soon felt her hands grabbing me by my sleeve. I heard a rustle of cloth and then she was guiding my hand again. Then I touched something that there was no explanation for. It felt like skin but like no skin that I'd ever felt before. I opened my eyes suddenly and looked at her. It was like an electric current had gone through me from the contact. I knew then that my life had just changed, forever.

Then to make things worse, I looked up and saw Lena staring at me with the biggest, dumbest smile on her face. Her legs had started moving with the contact even though her leg on the other side was elevated. Our touch had her very excited. It was like the contact had formed some type of link or feedback loop between us. But the link wasn't only two way. The tiny fluttering of her stomach let me know that someone else had felt the contact as well and reacted to it.

"She knows that you're here Danny, and she's happy too," said Lena. I recognized the tone in her voice. It was kittenish and playful with an undertone of lust. It was the same tone she always got when she really wanted to have sex. I snatched my hand away and stood up. But I knew in that moment that I was trapped.

Lena, of course, misunderstood my reaction. "Danny, I'm sorry," she whined. "You've done so much for me today. I wanted to give you something. I don't have anything else. People are always asking to touch my belly. I guess there's something about touching a pregnant woman's stomach. I just wanted to give you something. It's all I have to offer." The whining in her voice let me know that she was being sincere.

She wasn't trying to make me uncomfortable. She noticed then that her gown was still pulled up around her chest and her vagina was on display. When we were together she'd kept it shaved or at the very least very closely trimmed. She was pretty furry then. She quickly pulled the gown back down.

"I fucked up again didn't I?" she asked. Sobs went through her body.

"Lena, it's okay," I said. "In fact it was magical. I've never felt anything like that before. It was incredible. You and Mr. Wonderful are very lucky."

"Yeah," she said sarcastically. Then she started to tell me something but the arrival of the nurse interrupted her. We all have those moments when communication with another person goes beyond verbal and also beyond our mental ability to process it. Soul to soul communication they call it. I don't know why I thought about Power Station then. Power Station was a one off band formed by members of Duran Duran, the drummer, Tony Thompson from Chic and one of those English singers whose name I don't remember. They had a song, Communication, that went through my head then and every time I think of that moment.

I knew on a level that was far above mental what she was going to tell me. "What, Lena?" I asked breathlessly. She shook her head quickly as the nurse checked over her again.

"Nothing, Daniel," she said. "Thanks. I really mean it Daniel. Thanks for staying with me." She yawned as whatever they were giving her to put her under started to take effect. "Thank you so much. Have a good life, Danny. None of it was your fault." She'd begun to slur her words as she lost consciousness. "All my fault Danny...blame it all on the whore...gave up...best thing in m' life. Stupid whore. Love you Danny...always will...forever n ever...love you."

Then she was out. The nurse looked at me and told me that the surgery would run about two hours and it might be a good time for me to visit the nutritionist before she left for the day. I could see her and also see the physical therapist to find out what Lena could do and couldn't do following her surgery. She told me that being pregnant in the later stages was awful and uncomfortable, but to go through the later stages of a pregnancy while unable to walk was going to be hell on Lena and on me.

"There will be days when she'll want to bite your head off for nothing," she said. "She'll have mood swings that are absolutely out of control. I remember one day when my husband just walked into the kitchen. I threw a cast iron skillet at his head. For one fleeting moment my hormones were so out of whack that I wanted to kill him for making me pregnant." She laughed at my horrified expression.

"I guess the hormones made me forget that I'd begged him to do it. I love that man so much that I needed to have a child with him, but at that moment, in that fleeting instant, if I'd had two skillets to throw, I'd have killed him."

"But I'm not..." I began. "I mean we're not..."

"That woman loves you at least as much as I love my Phil," she said. "Whatever you guys are going through, you'll make it." She smiled and patted my hand and then went to help the other nurse wheel Lena away.

As I stood there in that empty room trying to decide what to do, my phone rang again. I answered it without thinking about who it might have been. "Why aren't you here?" asked Kim. "Oh shit, she got you again didn't she? Mom told me it might happen. Please don't tell me you're still at the hospital. Danny, I can't save you from stupid. That woman is lying there knocked up by the guy she left you for and you're just there sucking up all the shit she puts out. She's trying to get you back, dummy. Mom told me that she showed up at their house a few weeks back trying to give them some sob story about how he'd left her. If you hadn't moved she'd have probably showed up at your place. She probably did go back to that apartment the two of you used to live in."

I just listened to her ranting over the phone. "Danny, grow a set of balls and walk away from her. She's only going to do it to you again. Do you know that mom and dad basically got kicked off of the parents committee at church? The other people on the committee figured that mom and dad couldn't give advice on parenting issues or help to decide policy for families because they are such shitty parents. Mom can't even teach Sunday school anymore. They said that because her daughter is such a whore, they think it must've come from her somehow. Lena is only going to hurt you again, Danny. I just don't want to see that happen to you. Call me when you get home."

As I stood there thinking about what she'd said, it all made sense but none of it mattered. I'd known that her parents were very traditional and very involved with their church, but the reason they'd literally turned their back on their own daughter was suddenly clear. It still had nothing to do with me though. And as much as I still hated Lena, my mind was made up.

"Shit or get off of the pot, boy." The words brought me out of my thoughts. I looked into the kindly face of one of the hospital's janitorial staff. He was trying to mop the room while Lena was in surgery and I was standing in the middle of the floor.

I left the room after apologizing to him and went to see the nutritionist. She was a middle aged slightly chubby woman with a rosy face and a cherubic outlook. All the time that she was telling me about the types of vitamins and foods that Lena needed for the pregnancy and what she'd need to get her levels back up to normal, I had one sick ass thought. If nutritionists are experts on diet and nutrition why the hell, are a lot of them fat?

But I listened to every word she said and took notes on her suggestions on my iPhone. I made a huge shopping list of things I'd need. To put it in the frame of the choices I'd been given by the janitor; I'd decided to shit. I didn't care about Mr. Wonderful or his absence or even Lena. I was doing this for someone else.

I also listened to the physical therapist, much less enthusiastically. That woman didn't seem as nice and also truthfully, the baby would be born before Lena got the cast off of her leg and we didn't need to even think about PT until the cast came off or nearly so.

With the long delay caused by locating and listening to the two 'experts' and the fact that Lena's surgery went very smoothly, she was in recovery before I got back to her.

I had to wait around for a while before they'd even let me in to see her. But it really didn't matter because she was knocked out anyway.

An hour later, she was back in her room when her eyes first fluttered and then opened. I looked up from the game I was playing on my iPhone.

"Danny," she said. "Why are you still here?" There were tears running down her cheeks and I looked at her with a gruff expression on my face.




Fool Me Twice



"No one, not even you should have to go through something like this alone," I mumbled. "Visiting hours ended a long time ago. The nurses agreed to let me stay until you woke up so there'd be someone here for you. I'll..." I hesitated because it was a big step.

"Yes," she asked.

"I'll see you tomorrow," I said.

"You're coming back to visit me again?" she asked incredulously.

"No Lena," I said. "I'm coming to take you home. Your ankle surgery was minor. Normally they only keep you in the hospital for a few hours after the surgery. But since your surgery was so late and no one knew how long it would take for you to wake up. They've scheduled your release for tomorrow morning. The good thing is that we won't have to pay for a follow up visit, because your doctor can see you in the morning just before we go home."

Her face frowned up then. "What's wrong Lena?" I asked.

She shook her head and tried to smile bravely. "Have you ever done something so bad that every time someone says something to you, no matter how little the relevance that it just reminds you of how stupid you were?"

I had no idea of what she was talking about so I just shook my head and told her good night.

The next morning was a circus. First, we had to wait around for Lena's doctor to complete his rounds before he could come to do his post-surgery checkup, so she could be released. One of the nurses paged him and we found out that it would be almost an hour before he'd be there. I wanted to go ahead and do my grocery shopping, but Lena begged me to stay with her. I didn't understand why.

She said something stupid about wanting to spend as much time with me as possible. Finally, the doctor breezed in wondering why there was nothing but pissed off faces in the room.

The nurses had patients they needed the room for. The maintenance people needed to clean the room before it could be assigned to anyone else. And I wanted to get Lena out of there because I had to drop her off before I could even start the shopping. 

I guess the doctor thought that the sun shone out of his ass and that everyone was fortunate to await his beck and call. Anyway, finally they loaded Lena into one of those wheelchairs with one leg raised. One of the things I was told was that we needed to keep her leg elevated as much as possible. I knew that wouldn't be happening on the road because the interior of my Mustang was not what one could consider roomy.

I went and got my car and drove up to the door and we loaded Lena into my front passenger seat. I smiled at all of the nurses and thanked them. I fussed over Lena and she smiled and cried at the same time. "What's wrong now?" I asked.

"We aren't going to be on the road for hours," she said. "I can be uncomfortable for a few minutes, you know. But you making all of that fuss and adjusting seat belts...It's been a long time since anyone even pretended to care about me." I didn't have the heart to tell her that I really didn't give half a damn about her.

As the car started up, she noticed the vibration from the powerful 5 liter V8. I guess she hadn't noticed it the day before because she'd been in so much pain. Once we got on the freeway and I let the pony stretch her legs out, I noticed the expression on Lena's face.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"This isn't the way to the shelter," she said.

"What shelter?" I asked.

"I live downtown in the homeless women's shelter," she said. "At least I do for now. They limit the amount of time you can stay there, so I'm going to have to find another place very soon. Where are we going?"

"Lena, I'm supposed to be taking care of you and your baby," I said. "I'm taking you home with me." She turned and looked at me as if I was crazy.

"You don't have to do that, Dan," she said. "It's too much, really."

"So you don't want me to take care of you?" I asked slowing the car down.

"Yes, very much," she said quickly. "But I'd never have asked it of you in a million years."

"You do realize that this would have worked out better if you'd let me go and do the grocery shopping while we waited for that asinine doctor. Now I have to drop you off at the house and then go out and do the shopping and come back," I said.

"Danny, I didn't know that I'd be staying with you," she chirped. "I wanted every second possible with you."

I sped up again and barely exceeded the speed limit for the rest of our trip.

As we left the freeway and entered my neighborhood, Lena's head swiveled like it was mounted on a pivot. "Where are we?" she asked.

We pulled into my driveway and she looked at me as if I was crazy. "Why are we stopping here?" she asked. I pulled my remote down from the sun visor and my garage opened. I pulled in and walked around to help her out of the car. I put one hand under her legs and scooped her carefully out of the seat. I carried her through the yard and sat her down in a chair on my deck while I wrestled with the lock on my sliding glass patio door.

"Welcome to your home for the next few months," I said. Her eyes were huge.

"When did you get all of this?" she asked.

"When you left me, I was very close to getting a promotion at work," I said. "Once I got into the new position, with nothing at home to occupy my time, I've been concentrating on work more. I'm also free to travel for the company. That comes with certain benefits."

"Danny, you could have traveled before," she said quietly.

"No, Lena," I said. "I couldn't have. Being with you was far more important than any job ever could have been. If they'd offered to make me president of the company, in exchange for being on the road most of the time, I'd have chosen to be the janitor and stay with you."

She didn't say anything, she just looked around. I guess she thought I couldn't see the tears. "What's that?" she asked, pointing at a big rubber oval on the edge of the deck.

"Oh that's the pool," I said. "I put the cover over it this morning because I didn't want your baby to fall in. I have to get some of those child proof pool guards installed."

"Danny, do you know how silly that is," laughed Lena. Her laughter was magical. "It'll be about a month before she's born. And almost a year after that before we'll let her crawl around. She's in no danger, but maybe her mommy might enjoy a pool. If my leg wasn't in this cast I'd be begging you to let me in it right now."

"It's just so strange Danny. I never imagined that you'd have done something like this," she said. "I never even thought I'd ever have a chance to talk to you again as much as I prayed for it." I'd never been big on prayer so I let that one slide.

I opened the door and carried her inside. As you'd expect from a woman, she looked at everything she saw. She looked the place up and down. "Do you want me to put you in your room or the living room?" I asked.

"I have a room?" she said in a quiet voice.

"Well, until now it's been one of the guest rooms," I said. "The house has four bedrooms. I made one into a home office. My computer and all of that stuff, is in there."

"I'll take the living room," she said. "Just the thought of watching whatever I want on TV without twenty other single or expecting moms seems like a luxury to me." Then she got quiet.

I put her down on the sofa. I brought her a Pepsi and some chips to snack on while I was gone. "Lena, what kind of fruits would you like?" I asked from the kitchen.

"Dan, you know more about what I like and don't like than any person on the planet," she said smiling. "Just bring me what you want me to have." I looked back and she was snuggling herself into the couch. I went to the linen closet and opened the door. I covered her with a blanket and left the house to go shopping.

The next few days were amazing to me. Lena was coming out of her shell and her glow was returning. I don't know if it was the result of being waited on hand and foot or simply that she was misunderstanding what I'd done or why. But she was beginning to look and act, like my Lena again; a very pregnant Lena, of course, but Lena all the same.

Two people rarely enter into living together very smoothly and without friction. There are always going to be a few ups and downs. We had ours but the biggest one happened on the Sunday of that first week.

It is my habit to go out on Sunday morning and do my longest run of the week. I went out Sunday to run ten miles. I figured when I got back, I'd make a big Sunday breakfast for Lena and I, but it didn't happen.

I got back to my house on Sunday, as tired as I expected to be but what I didn't expect was to have the sound to two women screaming at each other.

My entrance into the house didn't make things any better. I stuck my head into the living room and two sets of eyes glared at me before I could extract myself.

"Danny, what the fuck is she doing here?" they both said exactly the same thing at exactly the same time. If they both weren't so pissed at me it might have been funny.

Kim stomped over to me. "I came over here for a Sunday morning swim and to make breakfast for you. I know how tired you get after those longer runs of yours," she said. "And what do I find? The pool is closed up and summer isn't even over and then I find Skanky McGillicutty on your couch. Do you want to explain this?" she asked, pointing at her sister.

"Well, I was awake and you usually make breakfast for me, since I can't get around very easily. I was expecting for us to have a nice talk like we've been doing all this week. Then I heard the door opening. I thought that since the person used a key, that it had to be you. Imagine my surprise to find out that my sister has a key to your house," said Lena.

"Your mom and dad have one too," I said. "They like to use the pool or the spa sometimes too. They're all the family I have left and they like to check on me sometimes ever since...well, you know."

"So you're telling me that she's free to just drop in whenever she gets a mind to?" asked Lena. "So I won't have any privacy even in my..."she stopped suddenly.

"I'm sorry Dan," she said. "I'm sorry Kim. Sometimes I forget about that part of my life being over. I'm not being a very good guest, but Kim was the one who started yelling first."

"I'm sorry I yelled at you Lena," said Kim. "I'm really pissed at Danny. You don't know what I had to go through to make him human again after the shitty way you dumped him and walked out on him without warning or reason. It just makes me feel like I wasted all of that time."

"Oh, I understand totally," said Lena sarcastically. "Danny extending a helping hand to some scummy whore just pisses you off. Even if she is your sister, who loved you all the way up until you and our parents turned your backs on me when I needed you most. You worked really hard to help Danny forget me and I have the gall to come back and drag him back down into the mud and shit with me. It's perfectly understandable."

"Oh bitch, if you really want to go there, then let's," sneered Kim. "Yeah, I'm pissed at Danny, because you just ran out on him without warning or without any sane reason and then just flounce your worthless ass back into his life, just as he's ready to move on from you. The woman he was supposed to go out with earlier this week was prettier than you and built better and a fuck of a lot smarter. I saw a possible future there for him and happiness down the road. I saw this house being full of love and laughter and kids who'd be my nieces and nephews maybe. Now with you back, all I see is pain for him, because I still don't see any reason why you wouldn't do what you did to him again."

"So tell me you worthless cunt," hissed Kim. "Did you ever once think about Danny before you walked out on him? Did you ever think about how those narrow minded people at the church would treat mom or dad or even how people would look at me afterward or was the throbbing in your pussy at the thought of it being filled with strange dick so intense that you just said fuck it?"

"I..." began Lena. "I..." and then she burst out in tears.

"I'm sorry Danny," said Kim. "I'm out of here. I'm sure you've spoken to her and the two of you have worked something out but I'm not staying around here to watch you hurt yourself again. It was painful enough the first time, when you didn't have a choice, but it's just torture to watch you when all you have to do is throw her out; the same way she threw your feelings for her away."

"Lena, you're my sister," said Kim sadly. "And you're right, growing up I loved you and looked up to you. But you don't get to hurt him twice. Whatever you've worked out, whatever little con game you're running on him is fine. But mark my words, when you're done with him and you decided to move onto your next pimp or whatever you call them, I want him unharmed. If you hurt him again I'll track you down and you'll regret it."

Kim turned to leave and Lena called out to her.

"Kimmie," yelled Lena. "I never asked Daniel to let me stay here and I have no intention of hurting him. We aren't trying to work anything out and as much as I've tried to talk about what happened to us and what happened to me, Dan won't talk to me about it. As soon as the baby is born and my leg is healed, I already know that I'm out of here."

"Luckily for me, Dan is far kinder to me than my own family. He doesn't want to see the baby born in a homeless shelter for unwed mothers, despite the way my family looks at it. And you're also wrong about the rest. I, more than anyone else in the world, know how stupid what I did was. I lost the best and most important part of my life for nothing. I have to live with that for the rest of my life. I don't need you to tell me how special what I gave up was." Lena's tears and her honesty melted off a little bit of Kim's anger.

"Kimmie, I don't want to even try to ruin anything that makes Daniel happy. Please don't leave or stop visiting him because I'm here. From now on if you'll call first I'll stay in my room and you'll never even know that I'm here. The same goes for mom and dad. You can all just pretend that the whore is gone and her baby too."

Kim just turned and left.

Lena just looked at me and shrugged her shoulders. "Sorry," she said. "I really didn't know that my sister had a key to your house."

Communication is an important part of a relationship and Lena and I didn't have it. We talked a lot. I had a cleaning lady who came in several times a week to make sure my house didn't end up looking like a bachelor pad. Most of the time, she came and went while I was at work. I paid her extra to come in a few more days and help Lena so I could work.

The funny thing was that though Mrs. Hayes, the cleaning lady, and I rarely spoke, we had a much deeper understanding of each other than Lena and I had. Lena and I spoke to each other constantly. Almost every second from the moment I came through the door until we went to sleep in our respective rooms was spent with us chattering about this or that. We'd talked about how I decided to buy the house and things I wanted to do with it. We talked about my new job title and my new responsibilities and where I saw myself going in the future.

Sometimes we talked about things we'd each like to do. It was very rare that we ever mentioned the past and even then we tread very lightly. It doesn't sound like a big deal, but it really was. Everything we talked about was just chit chat. We didn't really talk about anything that mattered or our feelings. That lack of communication meant that the two of us had completely different expectations and ideas about what was going on between us.

Lena really believed that we were becoming closer again and that our relationship was healing itself. She was hoping that we were headed towards a reconciliation of some sorts and since our divorce wouldn't be final until after the baby was born, maybe we could cancel it.

On the other hand, although I didn't hate Lena nearly as much as I once did, I had no intention of ever starting anything with her. All I knew was that from the first time I'd touched her pregnant belly, I'd become obsessed with it. I was beginning to think that perhaps I had some kind of pregnant woman fetish. But the thing about it was that I felt no connection whatsoever to Lena. What I seemed to be drawn to was the child in her womb.

Maybe our connection was spurious or tenuous at best but I felt so bad for that child. She reminded me of myself. Her father wasn't in the picture and she'd be denied the chance for the life she should have had because of someone else's selfishness. Her father had apparently disappeared. I didn't care how or why. Lena and I had never really sat down and talked about it. She'd tried to broach the subject on several occasions and I'd stopped her. In my case, the life I was supposed to have had been denied to me by Lena's selfishness and need to indulge her base instincts. So to me the child and I were the same. We'd both been let down and cast adrift by the people who were supposed to love us.

There was a time when just having Lena smile at me made my day. But now whenever she looked at me and smiled, it made my skin crawl. Sometimes at night when I'd carry her out onto the deck and softly place her down on one of the lounge chairs and rub lotion into her belly to help with the stretch marks, it was obvious to me that she really thought something was going on with us.

"Ooh Danny, you don't know how good that feels," she'd say. "I wish that these nights could last forever."

I never said anything because I didn't want to upset her, but my thoughts were more along the lines of whether or not I could sneak Kim in for a quickie.

Kim and I still got together. It actually seemed like we were getting together more regularly since Lena was in my house. I guess it was her way of checking up on me and making sure I was still okay. One of things that I simply couldn't understand was the thing between Kim and me.

Kim was strange. When we fucked, she was totally into it. She just lost control. She said whatever was on her mind and held back nothing. She'd tell me that she loved me and I knew she meant it. But at the same time, I also knew that I wasn't the only guy fucking her. She dated just like I used to before Lena came back into my life. Kim also expected me to still date and was often giving other women my phone number and telling them to call me.

One of the things she'd done recently had scared the living shit out of me. We were going at it hot and heavy and I was no stranger to the things that Kim says, but this was different.

"Fuck me, harder Danny," she screamed. "Fuck me the way you fuck Lena. I want to feel all of that love." That was it. My erection wilted and I just stopped.

Kim sat up and looked at me. "Sorry Baby," she said. "I don't know what came over me." I just stared at her.

"Kim, I already love you," I said. "You're the one who's stopping us from being more than just FWB."

"We're a lot more than that," she said. "We're more like RWB; Relatives with Benefits. But Danny you just don't see things straight right now. Maybe you need counseling or something to get you past the shit in your head. I'm not the one stopping us from moving on. I never have been. But I'm just not crazy enough to get into a relationship with a guy who loves someone else."

"Kim, I don't love anyone except for you. Maybe I'm a little bit scared of what happened to me with your sister happening again. Maybe that's why I'm a little bit afraid to move on, but trust me it isn't what you think," I said.

"You just don't see it yet," she said. "Right now you think that you hate her. And the thought of having sex with her is so loathsome to you that it just totally grossed you out. But the only reason for that emotion to run that hot is that you really still feel something for her. Sure you're still pissed at what she did to you, but I think that your feelings for my sister are still as deep as they ever were."




Fool Me Twice



Time seemed to fly by and a full week before Lena's due date I was awakened by her screaming for me. I ran into her room without even bothering to throw a shirt on.

I turned the light on and she went quiet. "My God, I'd forgotten how nice your body is," she said in shock.

"Lena, what are you screaming about. Oh, you wet the bed," I said. "Why didn't you call me sooner, I'd have taken you to the bathroom."

"Jeezus Danny, I don't pee that much," she snapped. "My water broke. I think you'd better call in and tell them you're not going to make it to work today. She's ready to come out."

I started to panic. "But it's not time yet," I said. "Is she finished?"

"Danny, it's not like we're baking a cake. I'm sure she's finished. She's probably just developed a little bit faster or the doctor's estimate of when I got pregnant might have been off by a few days. I kind of expected this. I'm pretty sure I knew when I conceived all along. Now get me to the hospital."

"Oh, shit, I was going to clean out my Cherokee and check the battery this weekend," I said. "We're going to have to get you good and dry." I was thinking that she was way too wet to put into my Mustang. I didn't think that stuff would ever come out of the leather. But then I realized that the baby I'd become so attached to was coming into the world and suddenly the car didn't seem so important.

The Mustang was more important than Lena, but not more important than her baby.

The staff at the hospital knew all about Lena and I. We'd become regulars there over the past few weeks. So when I carried her into the emergency room, they got a wheelchair and paged her doctor immediately.

They started checking her out and took her into the maternity ward as soon as we got there. I checked in at admissions to give them our healthcare insurance information. Luckily they still had everything on file and gave a couple of really quick papers to sign and sent me to maternity too. I was in the waiting room getting ready to sit down and make a few phone calls when the nurse came and got me. She looked really pissed and I had no idea why.

"Why are you in here?" she asked.

"I brought Lena in to have her baby and after I filled out the waivers and other forms they told me to come here," I said.

"They told you to come to this ward, but not this room," she spat. "Are you afraid or something? Well, she needs you to be brave so just step up, buddy. You can throw up later. All of the men do. But for now I need you get your ass in gear and get in here."

"Get in where?" I asked.

"The birthing room, of course; don't you want to see your baby come into the world?" she asked like I was committing a sin of some kind.

"But it's not..." I began.

"Look I understand that it's not what you wanted," she hissed. "But she really wants you there. So are you coming or not?"

I followed her numbly. They took my jacket and put a gown over the rest of my clothes. They put a hat and a mask on me and little booties over my shoes and pushed me into the delivery room. They basically told me to stay close to Lena and talk to her and encourage her, but at the same time to stay the fuck out of the way and let the pros do all of the heavy lifting.

They talked about dilation and blood pressure and a lot of other medical stuff that I had no idea about. They talked about 24 hour labor and complications and my head started to hurt. Lena was squeezing the hell out of my hand. The doctor told her to just keep breathing and to yell as she tried to push.

"What should I yell?" she asked.

"Shit, seems to be popular," said the doctor. "But anything that comes into your head is good."

They all started working while I just stood there terrified with Lena trying to grind my bones to dust in her relentlessly powerful grip. All of a sudden she just gushed out, "I love you Danny," and squirted a baby girl into the doctor's outstretched hands.

"Aw, that's so sweet," said the nurse who was attending to the doctor. "She loves you." I turned to watch the doctor to keep the nurse from seeing the revulsion in my expression. As I watched in awe the doctor cut the cord connecting mother to child. He then gave the baby a gentle tap. Everyone in the room held their breath as the small form wiggled a bit then sucked in a tiny breath and screamed.

I took one look at the squirming, mewling little mass of humanity and fell in love with her. She was red all over and covered in some kind of slime. I was immediately worried. "She's too small isn't she?" I asked.

"Five pounds and thirteen ounces, is a bit on the small side," said one of the nurses. "But she seems to be very healthy and that's the important thing, I'm sure she'll be fine." The nurses cleaned her up and held out the tiny baby for me to see.

"You're the first person to set eyes on her," said the nurse.

"I meant what I said Danny," moaned Lena, and I lost it. I headed for the door. "Danny where are you going?" cried Lena.

"Don't worry, Honey," said that same fat old nurse. "He's overcome with emotions, He doesn't want to lose it and cry in front of us. Give him a few minutes."

I snatched the hat off of my head and took of the gown too. I stalked through the ward and out of the hospital, glaring at everyone I crossed paths with. I finally took off the stupid little shoe coverings as I got to my car. I started the motor and just began to relax as the thrumming and vibration of the 5.0 liter 400 horsepower V8 began to sing its sweet synchronized steel symphony. I teased the gas pedal and the low, menacing growl of the exhaust echoed the roar growing in my throat.

I eased the car to the edge of the parking lot barely holding it in. I very slowly crawled the car down the street as my eyes narrowed more and more and my mouth tightened until it was only a line near my chin. Finally I got to the entrance to the freeway and we both let go together.

The sound of my tires shredding as I left a forty foot wake of burning rubber was eclipsed by the sound of my screams. "That stupid fucking biiiiiiiittttccccchhhhhh," I screamed. I pushed my foot down until it bottomed out, then backed off, switched gears and stomped it again. The sounds of rage coming from the car mirrored the way I felt. The car and I were one as we flew past slower cars and truck on the freeway headed nowhere in a hell of a hurry.

A quarter of a tank of gas later, I calmly slowed down, got off of the freeway and got back on it headed in the opposite direction. I had screamed out and played out my outrage. Now it was time to think about my anger and the reasons for it and decide what I had to do.

I was angry at Lena for two reasons. The first was because the bitch was trying to run some kind of con game on me. Her tearful declaration that, "I love you Danny," was too dramatic and too sappy to be anything but a staged ploy to try to invoke my emotions. It was her attempt at plucking on my heart strings and it wouldn't fucking work. The fact that she'd done it in front of strangers only made it more ridiculous. There was no way I would ever go back with her. In fact, the first day she'd come back into my life I'd told her not to ever say that to me again. Did she really think I'd let her get away with it?

By rights I should throw that bitch out on the sidewalk, or simply not go back to the hospital. I'd never set eyes on that conniving bitch again. It would be the right thing to do. But if I was going to do that I wouldn't have been so angry. I'd have simply snatched my hand out of her death grip and calmly looked her in the eye and said, "Lena, I told you not to say that." Then I'd have walked my ass out of the hospital and out of her life forever. I'd have paid the medical bills just so I'd never have to deal with any of her shit again and called it a day.

But I could do that, I was trapped. Despite my plan to keep Lena at arms-length, I was trapped.

The second reason I was pissed was because the baby had been born small. She seemed to be free of birth defects and diseases but who knew what her brain function would be like. I was really pissed about the baby being born small. Low birth weight is a symptom of several dangerous infant syndromes and I was worried about that baby. I know that I'm not her father. That asshole is, of course, nowhere to be found, but I loved that baby before she was even born.

I blame Lena again and the missing asshole, because when I first came into the picture, Lena was already malnourished and sick. She had to know that it would have affected the baby. The past six weeks of me stuffing her with vitamins and fruits and vegetables couldn't make up for the seven months of neglect. I felt like grabbing Lena around her throat and squeezing the life out of her. I felt like finding Mr. Not-so-wonderful and beating the shit out him as well. But I was trapped.

I knew then that I would do anything I had to do in order to stay in that child's life. I'd let her fucking mother continue to live in my house. I'd pretend that I didn't still want to kill Mr. Wonderful just so she could grow up with her "Uncle Dan," in her life. That tiny little girl held me captive and far more securely than the thickest walls or most solid bars of any jail.

I pulled back into the hospital's parking lot and pulled out my iPhone as I got out of the car. I called Kim and told her she was an aunt. I also left a message for her mom and dad to let them know they were grandparents.

I don't know where the time went to. It seemed like only a few seconds ago I was leaving the hospital so full of rage that I could barely hold it together. But more than an hour had passed.

I checked the desk and Lena was out of the recovery room and assigned a room in the maternity ward. I went to the room and found out that she wasn't there. She was in the radiology department having her ankle checked.

She looked up and saw me and as sick and queasy as she felt, she managed to smile. When she saw that I didn't return her smile her face faded. It bothered me somehow that my moods could affect her that easily and that much.

The technician told me that she'd be in there for about another twenty minutes. I left. I went to the maternity ward to see the baby. I almost didn't get a chance to. I didn't know the baby's name. "What's your name?" asked the woman at the desk When I told her she got a big smile on her face and then took me to a room with a big glass wall where I could look at her.

"So did you get it together?" she asked. Apparently the story of my meltdown was all over the hospital. "Don't worry," she said. "It happens a lot. Men suddenly realize that they have all of these new responsibilities and obligations. Suddenly there's this little person who depends on you for everything. It's overwhelming. But you're one of the good guys. The bad guys are the ones who leave and just don't come back."

After staring at the baby for a while, I swore that she was staring back at me. I waved at her and headed back to Lena's room.

When I got to the room she was sitting up in her bed. It looked alike she was waiting for me. I could tell that she was nervous.

"Um, the doctors wanted to x-ray my ankle to see if they could take the cast off," she spat. I just stood there. I tried very hard to stay neutral.

"Dan, look I know that you're pissed," she said. "And I haven't been honest with you at all. I was just scared. And I needed to make sure you didn't get upset with me...at least until she was born and hopefully I got the cast off."

I just looked at her. I refused to talk.

"Okay, Danny, we need to talk. If you want to throw me out of your house, fine, but I need to be honest with you. It's time for us to talk."

Again my expression didn't change I just glared at her. So she continued to talk.

"Danny, I'm sorry I said it," she said. "Do you know how much pain I was in? All week I've been reading stories about mothers who died in childbirth. I didn't know what to expect. All I know was that it hurt really badly and the pain killers weren't doing shit. I thought that I might die, so when the doctor told me to just say whatever...It just slipped out. So I'm sorry if hearing it hurt you. But since it's the truth I'm not sorry I said it. If you want to kick me out because I told you the truth, that's fine."

"You can stay for as long as you want," I spat. "I'll get over being pissed about what you said. Just don't make it a habit." I guess that wasn't what she wanted to hear. She looked down as if she was embarrassed or hurt.

"Danny what ARE you pissed about?" she asked. "I can feel anger coming off of you in waves."

"You could have killed her," I spat. "You and that bastard you were fucking. Didn't you ever think about what not eating or not eating right could have done to her. She's the smallest baby in the ward. Even some of the premature babies are bigger than she is. How do we even know that she's going to be okay? All we can do is hope and pray. I'll do the hoping. Maybe we can get your parents to pray. If anything happens to her I'll..."

"Danny, you can't blame Sebastian for this. He was gone before I ever discovered that I was pregnant. He'd already been gone for at least three weeks. I tried to turn to my parents. They didn't want to have anything to do with me. They never even let me get as far as telling them that I was pregnant. Do you know how much it hurts to have your own parents turn their backs on you?"

"Anyway things didn't go very well with the next person I tried to turn to either, Danny. You see after my parent turned me down, I came to you..."

"Bullshit," I screamed. "I never heard from you until the day I saw you in the street. And why would you have come to me anyway?"

"Oh yes I did," she snapped. "It was about seven weeks after I left you. I'd gone to the doctors and found out then that I was pregnant. I'd gone because I was feeling really shitty. Well I was feeling shittier. I'd been feeling shitty since the day I left you. I knew from the day I walked out of our apartment that I was making the biggest fucking mistake of my life. But once I'd told you, I couldn't go back. I knew you'd never even speak to me. So anyway, after talking to my parents I decided to just go ahead and bite the bullet. I would just go with my feelings and let you know how stupid I'd been and hope that there was still some iota of love for me left." She took a deep breath.

"I was surprised to find that my key still worked. I opened the door and went into the apartment. I called you but no one answered. I thought that maybe you'd gone out to run or you weren't there. After a few moments though, I started to hear things and I realized that you actually were there but that you were busy. At first I only recognized your voice and I could see that you were enjoying yourself. You weren't sitting around waiting for me to come back to you by a long shot. But I realized that you had the right to try to find someone else, after all I did. But Danny, what I did as crazy as it sounds, wasn't my fault. I wasn't in my right mind when I left you."

"Then I recognized the second voice. I couldn't believe that she'd do that to me. I walked over to the bedroom and the door wasn't even closed all the way."

"You were fucking my sister, Danny," she said. "You were fucking my sister in OUR bed. No wonder she hates me now. She knows how fucked up this situation is. She also knows how I still feel about you. That's why she's so God damned scared of me being around you. I know that I ruined our marriage Danny. I know far more about it than even you do. I also know that I'd do anything to fix it. Kim knows that too, that's why she just doesn't want to be around me."

Our loud voices and yelling had drawn people into the room. We looked away from each other and realized that there were several nurse in the room staring at us.

"We're fine," said Lena. "Danny and I just needed to vent."

Three days later we left the hospital and brought Ella home. In the ensuing time we hadn't spoken of our argument or any of the other things that we needed to talk about. It would still be two weeks before the cast came off of Lena's ankle. It was healing well but the doctor's told her not to put any weight on it.

That meant I spent a lot of time carrying Ella back and forth from her crib to wherever Lena was. I also started feeding her. And the next thing I knew I was changing her too. That led to me carrying her around and rocking her to sleep at night.

The two weeks flew by and finally we got to the day that Lena's cast was supposed to come off. I held Ella while they cut the cast off of Lena's ankle. Ella and I watched as they pulled the hard white exo-skin off of her mom's ankle and Lena started scratching it like it was full of ants.

They put a large walking bandage around it and told her to be very careful for the next two weeks but that it wouldn't hurt her to walk on it. They gave her a pair of crutches and sent her home.

All of the nurses who knew us came to see Ella. They cooed at her and smiled. On the way home Lena looked back at Ella while I drove. Strangely enough, I was so glad to be taking that little bundle of joy home that the thought of how badly her car seat was deforming the Mustang's leather rear seat didn't enter my mind.

"I can't believe that cast is finally off of my ankle," she said. 

"Don't get silly," I warned. "I've already been told that I'm supposed to make sure that you do your exercises. You have to make sure to make the joint stronger and increase the flexibility in it."

"Yeah, yeah," she smiled. "Do you know what the first thing I want to do is?"

I really thought I was beyond that. In fact I was sorry the second it left my lips. "Find some strange guy and have sex with him," I spat. The look of pain and horror on her face told me everything I needed to know. I'd hurt her and badly. I don't know if that had been my goal or if like she claimed in the hospital it had just slipped out.

When we got home, I tried to carry her into the house as I usually did, but she told me to let her get used to her crutches and trying to walk.

When we got into the house and I had put Ella down, I headed back into the living room to apologize. Despite the fact that I'd meant it when I said it, it hadn't been a nice thing to say. If I wanted to keep Ella around for as long as possible, I needed to keep the peace between Lena and I.

I went back into the living room and found her crying. I slowly walked over to her and hugged her. She returned the hug and started sobbing even more. "I'm really sorry, Lena," I said. "It was a childish, thoughtless thing to say."

"It's not just that," she said. She held up a piece of paper for me to look at. "Yours are over there on the table." Our divorce papers had come. "Now I'm truly not your wife anymore," she said sadly.

I just hugged her again and held onto her while she cried. "It's a good thing," I said. "Now you aren't trapped with me. You can actually go out and find someone that you want to be with."

She pushed herself away from me angrily. "Don't you understand that I want to be with you, Stupid? Danny, sometimes you can be such a fucking moron. I already told you that as soon as I left the house that day I regretted it. I went from living with a man who loved me to a man that just fucked me and fucked me over." She glared at me.

"I know you don't want to hear this. I know that you don't care about any of this but Sebastian never loved me. And I never loved him. He was a con man. He fed me all of this shit about pooling our resources. He gave me access to his bank accounts and I gave him access to mine. He convinced me not to go to work at least once or twice a week. He told me I could do some of the work from home and I did. I hated having sex with him and after the first couple of times I always made excuses. He didn't push so I guess that it wasn't any good for him either. He always told me that love was more important than sex, and he loved me."




Fool Me Twice



"What I didn't know was that Sebastian had heard some of the women around the office talking about me. He had the wrong idea. It was all just a joke. Everyone who knew us always talked about how much you loved me Danny. They always said that I was worth a million dollars to you. Over time that got shortened and they'd just say, "She's worth a million dollars." Sebastian heard a couple of people say it and didn't understand the context. He thought that I had a million dollars and decided to steal me away from you."

"As soon as he got into my bank accounts he discovered that I didn't have anywhere near that much money. It didn't bother him. He just stole everything I had and forged my signature co-signing for a car and some other things and left me with the bills. He also stole the passwords I had from the computer and stole money from some of my accounts at work. That's why I can't get a job in any facet of banking ever again. Anyway, he didn't even leave a note, he just disappeared. I never wanted to hurt you Danny. That's why when I left; I left you everything we had. I figured that since Sebastian was rich I didn't need anything. It even turned out that we were squatting in the luxury apartment we lived in. He knew the manager of the building and had lifted the keys. When they found out I was in the apartment I was arrested and now I have a criminal record." I couldn't think of anything to say.

"You know what the worst part of it all was Danny?" she asked. "The worst part wasn't that he took all of my money and ruined my career. Screw the money and the job. The worst part was that I was stupid enough to let him come between us. There's something else that you really need to know about all of this, but I'll save it for another time. There are two other things that I want to tell you right now." She looked me straight in the eyes and just said it.

"The first thing I want you to know is that you shouldn't be upset about what you said because right now I do want to go and fuck a strange guy but you won't let me."

"Lena, I don't care who you fuck," I spat. "Just don't do it in my house."

"Danny, you care," she smirked. "Because the strange guy I want to fuck is you. The thing that makes you strange is that you've been around me for six God damned weeks and haven't realized it."

"The second thing I want to tell you is what I was really talking about in the car. The thing I really want to do is to get into that fucking pool," she smiled. "You'll have to watch the baby. I've been looking forward to this since I first saw it."

"Lena, it's not going to happen," I said.

"So wait a minute, you're telling me that I can't use your pool, or are you telling me that you won't watch the baby while I do it?" she snapped. "Let me guess, now that I can get around a little bit you've decided that I can watch my own child?"

"Lena, if we're going to make this work, we really have to learn to speak to each other and to listen. Kim once told me that she thought I needed counseling to help me get over you. Maybe we both need counseling to try to get over the terrible things that happened to us. If we decide to do it, I'll pay for it," I said.

"Then why can't I get in the pool?" she asked calmly.

"First because I'm worried about you pushing your ankle too far the first day," I said. That made her face soften a little bit. "And the second reason is because there's no water in it. I drained it. I have nightmares about Ella falling into it."

Lena just started laughing. "Danny, how's she going to crawl into it when she can't even crawl? She can't even roll or sit up yet. Will you watch her while I use your hot tub then?" I nodded while she used her crutches to limp away from me mumbling and laughing under her breath.

The next year rolled by quickly. Ella grew like a weed. She was a tiny little thing but she was healthy and smarter than most kids her age. For the first couple of months, Lena and I didn't argue much, we had too much to concentrate on. Mrs. Hayes retired and Lena took care of the house and watching Ella while I worked. She went to her counselor and I went to mine. We didn't talk about that very much. We had our incidents and made it through them. After she'd started cleaning the house, Lena cornered me angrily and handed me a package. "I never realized how much sex you need," she snapped.

"Lena, what are you talking about?" I asked.

"Danny, you probably don't know this but I have a collection. My collection is getting on my fucking nerves. Here, I'm done collecting them. Give these back to my sister." I opened the box and there were at least seven or eight pairs of panties.

"Why are you giving these to Kim?" I asked.

"Because they're hers," she snapped. "I've found these in almost every room in the fucking house. What was she doing marking her territory? I can see her doing that, just walking around like dogs do, pissing on every tree in the neighborhood. Am I supposed to start leaving my panties in all of the places I found hers or do we have to just fuck in those rooms to give me the right to do it? Mrs. Hayes must have been a terrible housekeeper if she didn't find these or maybe you've been sneaking Kim in here every once in a while. I told you I didn't mind if she visited. I mean it is your house, but damn..."

As much as she was trying not to, Lena burst into tears and started crying. I grabbed her and hugged her. I let her cry her-self out.

"Lena, I haven't had anyone over here for any purpose since you came to live here," I said. "I think that like you said Mrs. Hayes...well she probably didn't know how to bring those up to me. So she just left them where she found them. I have a feeling that you knew that anyway. So why are you making such a big deal about this?"

"Because I hate it," she screamed loudly. She screamed so loudly that she woke Ella. At the first sound of Ella's voice, I was gone. I left her standing there. I came back holding Ella and rocking her. She was smiling again and holding her favorite toy. I got a bottle and held it for her as Lena followed behind us. "We're not done," said Lena.

"Danny, there are some things we really need to talk about and hiding behind Ella isn't helping," she said.

Ella at that moment was very happy. Both of the two people in her life were with her. She had her favorite chewed up stuffed toy and a bottle of juice. She picked that moment to say her first word, "Da da," she blurted. I saw Lena smiling even as I felt the dagger plunging into my heart. I very gently handed Ella to Lena and turned to walk away.

"Danny, where are you going?" asked Lena.

"Maybe I should get a PI," I said. "I'll hire someone to find her Dada and then all of our problems will be over. The three of you can be a nice tight little family and Kim can leave her panties all over the house."

Lena quickly came after me with fire in her eyes. "Danny, she's a baby. She doesn't know any better. All she knows is that you're the one she wants. You make her feel loved and cared for and despite all of this bullshit even this baby knows that you love her..."

"It didn't make any difference with her mother did it?" I snapped. She froze and just stood there. "Her mother knew I loved her and cared for her too, but she still ran off with another man. Why should Ella be any different?"

After a tense moment she came right back. "Danny, I deserved that, but she doesn't. What difference does it matter what she calls you? You've been there for her every moment of her life. You're the only Daddy she knows. Don't take that away from her because of something stupid that I did. I'm already paying for it. Don't make Ella pay for it too."

"Lena, you walked out on me and threw our marriage away, with no warning at all. You never even told me what I did wrong," I snapped. "You told me that you'd met someone and you wanted to be with him. That was it. Forget about everything we'd been through together. Forget about the way I felt about you, that was it."

"I run into you six months later and pull you out of the path of a car. I got you treated in a hospital and nursed you and your baby back to health and gave you a place to live. How exactly are you being punished?" I asked. "Nobody got punished except me Lena. Not you, not Magic Dick, only me."

She didn't have an answer for that so I walked away.

Over the next few months, every time I got itchy or irritable Lena went after me. "What's wrong Danny?" she'd ask. "Are you and Kim having trouble hooking up? There's an easy answer to that you know."

"Please don't start Lena," I'd say.

"Danny, why can't you just have sex with me?" she'd ask. "I'm a grown woman. I have needs too. And at least with me you wouldn't have to worry about whoever else I'm sleeping with."

"At least with Kim, I don't have to worry about being blindsided," I'd return.

"I made one mistake Danny," she'd say. "One mistake and I never get another chance. Kim has probably fucked twenty other guys since you two got together. I had sex twice with one guy and I'm out of your heart forever. And Danny, despite what everyone seems to think, I'm not a whore. I came to you and told you about Sebastian before I had sex with him. So I never cheated on you. I loved you too much for that."

"Yep, you loved me enough to just walk out on me. You didn't even give me the chance to fight for you. It was just Danny I'm outta here, I've found a better guy," I quipped.

One good thing that happened was that I actually took Ella to visit her grandparents and as I figured they melted. When I walked into their house carrying her, Lena's mom took one look at her and just started crying. I put Ella on the floor and let her toddle over to her grandmother and that was all it took. "Ella, can you say grandma?" I asked her.

"Gama," she said smiling and showing her sparse baby teeth.

By Christmas the entire family had gathered at my house for a very tense family dinner. The exchange of gifts was extremely weird. Lena's parents bought Ella a lot of presents. I did too and even her aunt Kim bought her a giant stuffed bear that terrified her at first and soon became her best friend.

Kim also tried to break the ice a bit by buying Lena a bottle of her favorite perfume. But that was as far as it got. Lena and Kim didn't speak very much and Lena's parents were still very angry at her, but it was a start.

After they left, I gave Lena a present of my own. As she started to clean up the table she smiled at me and told me that her mom had hugged her before she left and her dad had told her goodbye.

"That's progress," she said. "In a couple of years, we may be friends again."

"Would you like to open your presents yet?" I asked.

"I didn't get any," she said. "But as long as my baby is fine, I'm happy."

"You got several from me," I said. She looked under the tree and began tearing into things. I got her an iPhone, a couple of outfits and a gold necklace.

"Thanks Danny," she beamed.

"There's two more," I said, handing her a box and an envelope.

She opened the envelope and pulled out a check. "Danny, why are you giving me money? This is ten thousand dollars."

"Lena, everyone needs to have money in case of emergency or maybe to start their life over," I told her.

She opened the box and there was a little house in it. She looked at me strangely. It was like she couldn't process what was happening.

"Danny, I don't understand," she said.

"Lena, a few months ago you asked me how long you were going to be punished," I said. "I thought about it. I'm going to help you find a house and pay your rent for a year. In that time you should be able to get a great start on building a new life." 

"Danny, you're the biggest moron in the world," she said. She dropped the house and ran out of the room crying.

I sat down and watched Ella playing with her new bear. She was really fun to watch. She seemed to play with the wrapping and the packages more than some of the toys. She picked up one of the empty boxes and dropped it in the bear's lap and jumped back as if she expected the bear to move.

After a while spent watching Ella and playing with her I noticed that Lena had come back into the room and was watching me watch Ella.

"Danny, I've decided to accept your gifts," she said.

I smiled at her and said, "You're actually going to accept the gifts from a moron."

"Yes," she smiled. "I've picked the house I'd like to rent already. Here's the address." She handed me a strip of paper. I looked at it.

"Lena, this is the house we're standing in," I snapped.

"I'll rent it for a year if you'll live in it with me and Ella," she said. "And I tore up the check because I don't have a bank account so you keep it in your account for me until I leave."

"Now," she said. "I have a present for you too. It's something you used to really like."

"Is it Turtle wax?" I asked. "Because, I only use Turtle Wax products on my car. I tried the Meguire's stuff, but I just wasn't happy with it. Some of the Armor All products are okay too. I really like their tire gel. Even I have to admit that it's even better than the Turtle Wax Ice ultra-shine tire gel..."

"Um, all of that is fine, Danny," she said. "But I had something else in mind. Like something we'd have to wait for Ella to go to sleep for."

I was feeling uncomfortable at that moment and it showed. I don't know why I didn't just tell her that but I didn't. Women have this way of just sensing things and all of a sudden she got pissed. "So you can fuck my sister all over the house but I'm not good enough for you huh?" she said. "What is it? All of a sudden you're picking her because her tits are bigger. Or is it that she just lets you do any nasty thing you want to her? I thought that sex was the way that people expressed love for each other at least that was what you used to tell me when we were married. I didn't know that it was about just pounding each other like a couple of monkeys."

"Well, since you started this," I said. "Maybe it's because Kim and I don't love each other the way you and I were supposed to, Lena. Kim and I get together just to take care of our physical needs. You and I were magic, Lena. I got off just from being with you, because I loved you so fucking much that it was painful to be separated from you. I actually felt like we were a part of each other. Then out of nowhere, "Danny, I've met someone else and I want to be with him."

"Do you have any idea how badly that hurts? Do you have any idea of how fucked up that is or what it makes me feel like? So forgive me if the thought of bedding down with you doesn't appeal to me, but I have my reasons."

"Danny, my therapist, that you're paying all of that money for, has a few opinions about why I did what I did and some of them are physical. She also says that we need to try to return to normal relations. She told me that the first few times will be awful and you probably won't be able to get it up, but that we have to keep trying. She said that if we want this to work..."

"And there's where she fucked up," I interjected. "Who said that we want this to work? Who said anything about returning to 'normal relations'? When did that become one of our goals? What exactly are our goals? Do we even have the same goals?"

"Danny, what do you think we're doing?" she snapped. "Of course we want this to work. You and I are supposed to be together. We're going to raise our family and do all of the things we've always planned. Our goal is to get back to the way we used to be. I admit that I fucked us up. I was wrong Danny. I was out of my mind and didn't realize it until it was too late to turn back. Even when I realized it, I figured that I had to make the best of it, but after having sex with him even once I knew I was screwed. I knew that it would never work and it didn't. In a way, his leaving me was a blessing, but that's all the past. A new year is coming, Danny. We have to put the past behind us."

"Okay," I said. "Now I know what your goals are. Mine are different. I just want to make the best of a truly fucked up situation. Just like the shit with your shrink, I don't want to go into how I see the situation but I see things different from the way you do. I just want to feel normal again. I'd really like to get you out of my head and out of my heart. Since we broke up, or since you dumped me, I've had all kinds of issues. For a while I doubted myself, then I, thanks to a lot of friends, including Kimmie; I got my confidence back and started to move on with my life."

"One of the biggest things that I haven't been able to move on from, Lena is US. I just have you in my mind and my heart as something special. Even though you weren't, my mind and my heart seem to think that you are. I still have all kinds of warm and fuzzy feeling about the way things were with us and I can't seem to break them. "

"I guess to truly break them, I'd have to expose them for how flawed they really were but at this point, I think it would do more damage than good. I'm taking it a step at a time. It's like when you fall off of a horse. There are only two ways to get over it. One way is to avoid horses for the rest of your life. Shit, I know people who won't even watch the Kentucky derby or cowboy movies because they're too afraid of horses."

"The other technique is to get your ass right back on a horse and stay there until you're not afraid any more. That's the one I'm doing. Instead of walking around, afraid of someday running into you, I'm making myself see you and be around you and talk to you until you're just like any other person. I still think that sex with you was somehow magical and it meant so much more than doing it with other people. I guess, in my mind, I built it up too much. Except for the last time that we were together when it seemed like you weren't into it, my mind seems to think that sex with you was some miraculous thing." She snorted.

"Lena, on a purely physical level, I don't think it was, but I'm basing that purely on the facts. It's the emotional thing that confuses me," I said. "Our minds and emotions really fuck us up sometimes."

"Don't they?" she said. "You don't even know how stupid you sound. You gussied what you said up. You gave me a bunch of analogies and horseshit, but what you really meant came through clearly. What you said is that you still love me. You don't want to though and you're afraid that I'll hurt you again. You're trying to get over me though and you think that if we have sex, either it will be special and magical, which would mean that you're really fucked. Because then you'd be stuck. You'd have to put up with the whore and keep her around. Or there's the possibility that if we have sex and it wasn't very good, it would seem like you'd been stupid all of your life and you'd wasted it on a whore who wasn't worthy of you in the first place."

"It's more complicated than that," I said.

"Is it really?" she asked. "Maybe you just want it to be. Maybe you're just afraid to find out. Maybe you're just so afraid that you've decided to spend the rest of your life fucking women that you don't care about because you're terrified of what will happen when you get back where you belong."

"Maybe I'm just afraid of the long term effects of undiagnosed venereal diseases," I spat. "Besides, you once told me that your sister was marking her territory by leaving her panties all over the house. It seemed to piss you off royally. It's the same way dogs behave. When they smell another dog's piss on their trees, what do dogs do? They piss on the same trees and leave their own scent on them don't they? Well I'm not territorial like a dog is. I'm a human being. I think that when something is mine, it's mine because it belongs to me. I don't need to go around pissing on other dog's trees. When I see that something belongs to someone else, I don't need to mark it. I simply get my own."