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Consequences - Samantha

By: thecelt



It was just one afternoon that didn't really mean anything. She just had to see what it was like.

Edited by Lady Cibelle

*

I must be crazy. That's what I told myself as I looked at my reflection in the mirror and almost changed my mind again. But I didn't. What I saw was a middle-aged woman with long red hair and big green eyes that were now narrowed with intent. I looked down at my body, still firm and well proportioned and ran my hands erotically down my side and over my hips. I decided that I would keep the black lacy bra and matching panties I had decided on before and then reached for my jeans. I slipped them on, an errant and deceitful thought reminding me that I had to press Jeff's slacks and shirts before I put them away. I slapped that thought down and pushed it away! It had no place in what I was doing!

With difficulty, I slipped the button into the slot and let out the deep breath I had been holding. I needed to do that just to button these jeans. I knew they were a size too small but Jeff liked them and so did I. Again, the unwanted thought crept into my mind as I looked at the curve of my hips and the skin-tight fit of the jeans on my thighs, especially where my legs joined. That cleft was most erotic and I liked the way I looked when I wore them. I knew I should have either let them out or put them into the bag for the Salvation Army, but these jeans were just what I wanted to wear today. I told myself, almost defensively, that Harris would like them as well.

The blouse I wanted to wear was one that was so sheer the bra would show clearly when it was on and buttoned. But it was just slutty enough that it would be perfect for this afternoon. I blushed at my own thoughts before pulling an oversized top over my head to cover the transparent blouse. I made sure the neck was snug, not showing any white and that the bottom hung down over the tight swells of my butt. I looked at myself once more, making a turn to show all of me, and decided that it was perfect. The legs were a little too tight, but Jeff wouldn't notice my jeans with this top and he had no way of knowing what lay under that same top. He would assume that I was just wearing my normal jeans and sweatshirt: my androgynous look. That thought brought a brief flash of anger that quickly dissipated.

I calmed my thoughts and then walked downstairs to find Jeff, my husband of sixteen years and my two children, Amy and Bradley, both thirteen years old, sitting together in the kitchen, discussing their afternoon plans. They were paternal twins and looked nothing alike. Amy was happy with that result while Brad didn't care much one way or the other. In my eyes, they were both beautiful and perfect. Right now they were all smiling and sharing some secret among themselves. That also wasn't unusual for this family. They weren't real secrets. Our family was well-adjusted and healthy and we discussed our problems openly and freely, but just the suggestion of a secret was enough to get some well-meaning argument started. Just good family fun.

I sat down and listened for a few minutes without really caring what they were talking about. I just wanted to look at my family again before doing what I planned for the afternoon. I looked first at Amy, the daughter who I loved without reservation. She took after me in her looks. She was tall for her age, taller than her brother and likely to stay that way throughout high school. She was cute, her red hair worn long and straight, the bangs over her brow giving her huge green eyes a continuously surprised look. She was well proportioned for her height without that skinny look that a lot of teen girls hang onto until late in their development. To top it off, she was bright and intelligent.

Brad was more like his father. Jeff and Brad were both short and stocky. Jeff was just three inches taller than I was and Brad was not far behind. Jeff was well built, his chest and shoulders wide and well-developed and his hips narrow above strong muscled legs, while Brad still had to grow into his bones. He was almost as tall as his dad but he didn't have the strong definition to his body that would come with maturity. Both had the same light brown hair and gray eyes and both shared the same wild sense of humor. That humor drove his sister crazy at times but she knew it was just fun. I loved it and treasured it.

When they finally slowed down, I got their attention and asked to review my 'list' once more. This was a list of things that each needed that I would pick up while on my once a month trip to the mall. I had always loved to shop while Brad and Jeff hated it. Amy would go but now, only with her friends. Going to the mall with her mother was not 'cool' so I planned my trips to go alone, armed with my list. Today was a little different but none of them had any clue as to how different it was going to be. They only knew that this was my routine and they all accepted it. I counted on it as I began to review with each one what they wanted.

As I went through this activity, I reviewed in my own mind what items I had already purchased. I had begun this list earlier and gone to the mall several times over the last two weeks to pick up as many of the items as I could in advance. The twins had added some last minute things to the list over the past several days but that was no problem. I did intend on going to the mall for at least a half hour before leaving for my real destination. I could finish my shopping in that time. As they finished with comments on my paying attention to their special wants, I felt a tug of guilt that I quickly pushed back. I had made my decision and I was not going to change my mind now.

This afternoon had been planned for almost a month and I felt more than ready. I had begun planning it almost immediately after the last one. Only I and one other person knew about my plans for this Saturday afternoon and he wasn't part of my family. And to be sure, the decision to do this hadn't been easy. It took a lot of arguing and persuading with my own self to finally decide that it was something I really wanted to do. Even after I made the decision, the arguing wasn't finished. Just this morning before I began to get dressed I was still trying to make up my mind. I almost decided not to go ahead but then a comment from Jeff made me certain. It was certainly nothing of any importance but it seemed so much more to me.

Jeff had not been very open with me recently and that was probably my fault, but I felt I had my reasons and Jeff was not willing to discuss them with me. We hadn't been intimate for some time and we were just barely tolerating each other. I had slowly convinced myself that everything that was wrong was his fault. This morning was typical: I had made some suggestion about dinner, asking Jeff to order something so I wouldn't have to fix anything. Jeff offered to do the cooking but instead of accepting that offer, for some reason I snapped at him as I had been doing so much lately and asked him why he couldn't just do as I asked. He didn't answer for some time and then finally said he would do it my way. Then he walked away and went downstairs. I was still angry at his attitude but I wasn't sure why. It just seemed that everything he did now was enough to make me angry. 

As I gathered my things together for my trip to the mall, I let my mind wander. I waved distractedly at the kids when they yelled goodbye and I don't remember whether Jeff said anything or not. I was still thinking back as I backed out and drove toward the big shopping mall just a few miles from our home. My mind was thinking about my life and my marriage, trying to find some justification for my intended actions.

Jeff and I were married in the fall of 1991. Jeff was a chemical engineer working for The Powers Group, an engineering consulting firm of some repute, and he was only one of many young engineers working their way up the chain of management. Jeff was one of the better ones and his future seemed bright. He was twenty-seven and was already a group leader with promises of promotions to come. He was handsome, witty and eager to have fun. I met him at one of the local watering holes while out with some of the girls from my office. 

I was a pool secretary, working for a law firm whose primary cases involved corporate work. I had a degree in languages and could translate from German and Spanish to English. Those were the areas of my expertise and I was paid accordingly. I was all of twenty-five and had just gotten out of a long but unsatisfying relationship with a man whose only claim to fame was his good looks and rumors about his amazing ability in bed. I agreed with the first but certainly not the latter. Our breakup was mutual and left me with a lot of time on my hands. Going out with the girls was one way to use some of that time. 

We met while I was waiting at the bar for drinks. I had the honor of buying a round and I was waiting for the bartender to fill my order of three whiskey sours and two gin and cokes when Jeff came up behind me. I didn't realize he was there and backed into him when I reached for my wallet. I excused myself but when I turned, his grin caught me by surprise. He smiled wider when he saw me and said, "I would say I'm sorry, but that would be a lie. It was actually very pleasant."

I was ready with a smart comeback but after looking into his innocent gray eyes, I choked back my reply and returned his smile. I decided to reply in kind. "I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was certainly my pleasure."

He laughed, a laugh that really caught my fancy and I asked for his help in getting the tray of drinks back to my table. He followed, I set the drinks down and turned to him with my hand out. "Hi, my name is Samantha Bradley, Sam to most of my friends."

He answered, "Glad to meet you, Sam. My name is Jeff Watson. Would you care to join me? I'm with some other guys as well, but we could get a table for the two of us."

I was taken by surprise by his impetuous request but quickly made a decision. "I'd be happy to. Just let me tell my friends and then we can find a table." I turned back to my group, but they had been watching and listening and the grins told me they agreed with my decision. I spoke to Lucy, the girl I was most likely to go home with and told her that I could manage. She laughed and slapped me on the back. Jeff then walked with me over to an empty table and once I was situated, went off to talk to his own friends. He came back and we spent that entire evening with each other, and that was the beginning of our courtship.

Over the next half-year, we became boyfriend and girlfriend, then lovers and finally moved in to live with each other. We found a small apartment and began our lives as a couple. It was not that long before we decided to make it permanent and married. Both Jeff and I continued in our jobs and we began to save for a small house. Jeff was promoted twice during that time and now was a regional manager with a group of five engineers working for him. His future with the company looked very good.

I was still working in the law firm and I was doing pretty much the same thing, but the money was good and it went a long way toward moving the day we could afford our home closer. We continued in that way for the next two years before I announced to Jeff that I was pregnant. He was so happy, he couldn't stop calling people and bragging about becoming a father. I was happy he was happy but I was also getting to that point where I would have to quit and stay home with the babies. We had both agreed that I would stay home and raise them at least for the first five years. That was my choice and Jeff readily agreed with it. 

We found the house first, made an offer and once it was accepted, we signed the papers and became homeowners. It was a wonderful house, with three bedrooms and a large yard with a swing set the previous owners left behind. It had a fence around the back yard and we did some work to make it safe for toddlers. Our twins had been born without problem and we brought them into the nursery we had ready. It had two beds, two lamps, two of everything necessary for a baby to wear. It was perfect and I loved everything about it. I settled in with my new family and never looked back.

During our life together, one thing was always constant. Jeff and I loved each other and we showed each other every day. I would fix his favorite meals and make sure he had his favorite beer for the weekends. He would send me flowers at least once or twice a month and he always asked about my day and how the kids were progressing. We sat together each evening after the kids were in bed and cuddled. At bedtime, either Jeff or I would initiate sex at least twice a week and usually more. It was lovemaking at its sweetest for me and satisfying for Jeff as well.

Jeff was a hard working engineer but he never let the job become his life. He would bring work home, but he always did it when the kids were napping or when they were being bathed or fed. He did his share but when work was necessary, I took over the kid duties while he finished. But that was rare and he never made it a habit. If there was a choice between work and family, Jeff would always choose family first. I loved that about him.

As the kids grew, I became restless and finally asked Jeff if he minded if I went back to work. He said he didn't have any objections if it made me happy. Jeff and I talked about it, made a schedule of things to be done at home that we felt would work for both of us and I applied for a job with my old firm and a couple of the others in town. I was lucky and got offers from two. Jeff and I talked it over and I agreed to go back to my old firm even though the money wasn't as good. But with Jeff's position now, money wasn't really the driving factor. My old firm had flex time and my hours could be adjusted. That made the difference to both Jeff and I. I accepted and started back to work. The twins were nine years old at the time.

When I think back, I believe that was the start of the change in our relationship. Was it my fault? I don't know but if I had to guess, I'd say. . . . probably. I know that going back to work was a new life for me, one that was totally different than running a house with two kids and a husband. As the years passed, and I became more involved in the work I did, I no longer had the time for those special meals we always shared or to be sure the fridge was full of Jeff's favorite beer and the twins' favorite sodas. Snacks would often run out and Jeff or I would have to make a store run for necessities. Weekends became time to do the things that didn't get done during the week and we found we had less time just to sit and talk and cuddle and. . . . . . . Yes, things changed.

With all that changed, the one thing we both tried to maintain was our love-life. We felt it was important not to lose that closeness, that intimacy that we shared most during those times. It wasn't always about sex but it was always about intimacy. Some nights, we would just fall asleep in each others arms. As a result, nothing changed in the bedroom until about a year ago. I can remember that night almost like it was yesterday. 

I had been working on a major case with a lot of critical translations. So critical I had to spend more and more time in research on technical terms and scientific notation. It was taking all my days and I had to extend it into my evenings. I would bring the work home, rush to fix a quick dinner, often order take-out, then nag the twins and Jeff into cleaning the dishes and the kitchen while I rushed off to the small den to continue my research on line. That continued for some time and my evenings became filled with work. 

At bedtime, I was often much later coming to bed and Jeff was often asleep when I did. On those occasions where he wasn't, he would reach for me and I would slap him away in irritation. I told myself that he wasn't thinking about me, only himself. Why couldn't he see that I was tired? I needed to sleep so I could continue the next day, working on my job like he did on his. He said little those nights and rolled over and went to sleep. I never thought much about it, just happy that I could get to sleep.

Then one night when I had come to bed very late, ready to go to sleep, my eyes so heavy I could hardly make it up the steps, Jeff reached for me as I slid under the covers. I didn't react, too tired even to slap his hand. He reached down between my legs to rub me while he took one of my exposed nipples in his mouth. At first, the sensation was so pleasant I just lay there enjoying it until the irritation came rushing back. I needed sleep, damn it! Why couldn't he leave me alone! I reacted in anger and pushed his hands away. Then I let him have it.

"Damn it, Jeff! I need to get some sleep. Can't you keep your damned hands to yourself? Just leave me alone!" With a weak flash of guilt, I continued, mumbling, "Maybe this weekend we can get together."

I rolled over, put the pillow over my head and tried to get to sleep. My heart was pounding in my anger and my gut was roiling, the acid burning, but it wasn't long before I fell to sleep, and slept soundly all night and well into the following morning. I woke late, rolled over to find Jeff already up and gone. I looked at the clock to see it was past seven thirty and I was going to be late if I didn't get started. I jumped out of bed and got dressed, ran downstairs to find no coffee and said a few unflattering epithets about Jeff's lack of consideration under my breath. Both kids were up and dressed and ready for school but they didn't say much to me. I didn't notice, so wrapped up was I in my own concerns.

That night when Jeff came home, I noticed that he was very quiet. Not only that, but both Brad and Amy were also sort of withdrawn and seemed uneasy. I asked them what the problem was but both denied any concerns. I decided to let it go and ask Jeff after they went up. I went into the den and worked on the translations still outstanding until very late. By the time I went out to find Jeff, he had already gone up to bed. I decided it was time to talk to him so I turned out the lights and followed. I wasn't even aware of what time it was.

The first thing I noticed when I did go up was that Jeff was sitting on the bed, but he hadn't undressed. That was very strange in that he had obviously been up for some time but he was just sitting there, no book open or anything keeping his attention. He just looked at me as I walked into the room. I stopped and looked back, trying to fight my rising irritation. I finally asked him, forgetting that this was exactly what I wanted to do in the first place. Ironic? Not to me at the time. 

"What's going on, Jeff? You've been so quiet all evening and so have the twins. And you were gone this morning without waking me and you didn't even fix coffee. And the twins were quiet this morning as well. What's going on, Jeff?"

"Why would I wake you, Sam? Didn't you lash out at me the night before about keeping my damned hands to myself, not letting you get some sleep?"

"I was just so tired, Jeff, and I could hardly keep my eyes open. I just wanted to go to sleep, that's all. I didn't mean to yell at you. It was just that I was so tired. I'm sorry I upset you."

"I know you were tired, Sam. I guess your job is so important, we just forget that you need time to yourself. A lot of time. Every evening now, it seems. You just go into that den and that's the last we see of you. We just can't compete with your precious job anymore, Sam."

The sudden surge of anger caught me by surprise and before I could control myself, I said, "Well pardon me all to hell! I guess I should just forget my job, the people who depend on me and just say that my husband needs some pussy so I have to stop everything and give it to him. Well, guess again, buster!"


Consequences - Samantha



Before the echo of the last words faded, Jeff rose, pushed past me and went downstairs without a word. I stood there, shaken by my own words and not sure what the hell had just happened. I was stunned and unable to move. After what seemed like ages, I finally walked over to the bed and just collapsed. My head was spinning and my mind was in turmoil. I was shocked at myself for my outburst and ashamed as well. I tried to understand what I did and why I did it but nothing came to me. I was unsure of what I should do. Should I go downstairs and apologize to Jeff? Should I just wait until he came upstairs and then apologize?

I undressed and got ready for bed, waiting for Jeff to come up. I would apologize and try to make it up to him. What I said was inexcusable, that much I knew. I would just lie here and wait for him. That was my last thought until the alarm woke me the next morning. I rolled over and pushed the alarm before the memory of last night came back to me. I looked over at the place where my husband slept to see the covers undisturbed. Jeff had not come to bed at all! I rose, threw on a robe and ran downstairs to find him, but he had left for work already. It was an hour early but he was gone.

I worried all that day at work but by the time I was ready to leave to go home, the urgency had left me. I apologized that evening when Jeff returned from work and he seemed to accept it but he was never the same after that. Yes, I believe that's when things began to change. As I remember it now, it was almost three more months before I finished that job, and after that, things just never seemed to get back to where they were. That was about a year ago, give or take a month. Yes, that's when it all changed.

Harris Falkner was a law student and a summer intern at the firm when I first noticed him. He was no more than twenty-one or twenty-two and he was just trying to get his foot in the door by working for several of the partners as a clerk. He was eager and quick to learn and I was fascinated by him. He introduced himself one afternoon and asked if I could help him in a translation. I told him that I could find some time later that afternoon and for him to get his things together so we could do what he needed quickly. He did so and I was able to help him. He was grateful and after that, he rarely missed a day without saying something nice to me. I began to look forward to his short visits as a pleasant part of my day.

As time passed, Harris became familiar with most of the staff and he and I spent time together when we both had some free time. I found out a lot about him. He told me that his family had money but he wanted to make it on his own. He was finishing his undergrad work this year and would go on to law school next term. He was cute and I found him to be very interesting. He was over six feet tall, slim build with a handsome face and dark brown hair that was always falling over his eyes. His blue eyes were fascinating, his gaze so intense you felt you were the center of his world. 

I became aware that he was flirting with me almost from the start but I found it to be very flattering. I was confused since I was at least eighteen years older than he and that difference didn't seem to bother him. I was almost old enough to be his mother but he never treated me that way. It was never platonic and it certainly didn't bother me. Our flirting become more blatant and I admit to being a party to it. I just told myself it was harmless and would lead to nothing.

That's where I was as my life with Jeff continued to deteriorate. We had not been intimate for at least three months. We seemed to be fine when the kids were present but after they went to bed, it was almost silent. We had sex a few times earlier but that just stopped since we both knew it was not making love. We hardly ever talked about anything other than necessary things and we shared no intimate moments either in bed or out. 

It was no longer my job that was keeping us apart; it had become almost a habit now. We never talked about it or discussed our marriage or that it was in crisis. I did discuss it with Harris on several occasions and my lack of sex life did finally come out. Why I would discuss my marriage with someone like Harris was a mystery that I didn't really understand but that's exactly what I did. I discussed it with this boy rather than with my husband. I knew that Jeff had tried on several occasions to get me to talk about it, but I rudely dismissed his concerns as trivial. That was when I started on this path, the path leading me down this slippery slope toward betrayal.

As things with Harris continued to develop at work, my fortieth birthday was coming up in a month. Jeff mentioned it one evening when we were with the twins and I just dismissed it as of no consequence. Jeff asked me what I would like to have and if I wanted to do anything special. I thought about it and decided that I wanted nothing more than to just ignore it. I told them that and made him promise not to do anything with the kids to celebrate. He tried to discuss it but I was not in the mood and I snapped at him. He stopped talking about it and seemed angry when he said that he would not mention it again. Both Amy and Brad seemed upset as well, but I didn't pay much attention. I simply forgot about it as I had been doing lately.

It was now near my birthday and I hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary at home so my wishes were being honored. But I didn't know how I felt about it now. That's what I wanted, wasn't it? Not to do anything? Well, at that time, it was. Now, as I talked about it to Harris, I made it seem that Jeff had just pushed me aside and decided to do nothing. How did I come to that? I didn't have a clue! I guess in my own clouded thinking, I was trying to minimize my husband and maximize my own suffering, while drawing Harris into my illusion. I think I had already begun to rationalize my feelings of abandonment and place the blame on my husband. I know that none of that was real but in my mind, it all began to build up and my resentment began to grow. I used my relationship with Harris to vent my anger and my frustrations.

Harris was a perfect foil for my resentments. He listened, he sympathized with me, he made flattering comments about my beauty and how he would never desert me as Jeff had. He never missed a chance to downgrade Jeff or build me up as a desirable woman. Even though he was much younger than me, he said he understood me and my needs. He told me that girls his age were shallow, interested only in fun. I was more mature and I understood what was real. By the end of the month before my birthday, Jeff and I had discussed the idea of meeting outside work. I mentioned my monthly mall trip and asked if he would like to meet me for a drink afterward. He agreed and we made plans. 

That Saturday, I had my list and I was moving quickly through the mall since I was very familiar with all the stores. I usually enjoyed this time to myself, more so lately. Although I was shopping for all of us, I was alone and I loved browsing the store windows without having to hurry or please someone else's schedule. I was almost finished when I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to see Harris standing behind me. I smiled as a jolt of pleasure went through me. I was happy to see him and we chatted as I moved toward my next stop. I went in, Harris right with me and I admit to being pleased that this young man was so intent on being with me. After the first store where I found all my items, the fun of sharing my choices with someone who was interested was a pleasure.

The afternoon passed quickly and when I was finished, I noticed that the time had just flown by. It was already four thirty and I had to leave to make it home in time for dinner so I reluctantly told Harris that our time for drinks would have to wait. He walked out with me and helped me carry my purchases to the car. Once there, I loaded the trunk and shut the lid. As I turned, I moved right into Harris' outstretched arms. He pulled me tight against him and he kissed me with such passion I didn't even resist. We kissed for several minutes right there in the parking lot of the mall. As his young body pressed against mine, I felt his arousal as it pressed against my stomach. I enjoyed the feeling and wondered what it would look like, so young and eager. I finally pushed him back and looked at him in surprise. 

Harris took both of my hands in his and looked back at me. "Stay with me, Sam. I'll get us a room so you can stay. I want to make love with you so badly. Please, Sam, stay."

I was shocked at his suggestion but the idea began to pull at me. I found myself wanting to do this, to be with him and to stay with him. But I knew that Jeff and the twins were expecting me home and if I stayed, they would worry and would be calling me to find out where I was. I had no reason to stay away. I had no excuse that would satisfy my husband. And I had to be sure he couldn't find out if I did stay. No, I couldn't do this now. But when?

"Please, Harris, let me think. I can't do this today or anytime soon without plans. I'm married and it's not so simple for me. I have people who are expecting me. Let me go now. I'll talk to you at work next week. Just let it be for now. But I will think about it, Harris. I will. I think I want this too."

 Without waiting for his reply, I hurried to the driver's side door and slid in, shutting the door behind me. I started the engine and backed out quickly, almost without looking. Fortunately, I was clear and I pulled out and drove away, not looking back. I drove home with my packages and by the time I pulled into my driveway, my mind had calmed down and I was able to spend the remaining weekend with my family without any suspicion. Actually, if I had even noticed, I would have found Jeff not even paying attention to me. We had fallen apart so far and I never saw it.

During the next few weeks, I talked with Harris and convinced him that I was still considering his suggestion. We maintained our usual routine and went to lunch on several occasions. We kissed several times, each time more intense than the one before and my need to be with him increased. During our kisses, there was more and more body contact and each time I could clearly feel his arousal. He even felt my breasts on some occasions and he usually had my ass in his hands. I took him in my hands as he gasped with desire, but we went no further than contact through our clothes. At the end of that month, I found myself becoming wet just at the sight of him. 

I finally came up with the idea of meeting him for the afternoon on the Saturday I was scheduled for my monthly shopping trip. The idea of purchasing most of the items in advance, a few at a time, came from Harris. He just suggested I get the list started early and buy the items as they suggested them. That way, my trip would be no different to those at home and I would have more time to be with Harris. I agreed to do that and over the next two weeks, bought almost all of the list before that Saturday. Harris told me that he had reserved a room in a motel a block away from the mall and that we would meet, do what few things remained and then drive to the motel in separate cars. I agreed and our plans were set.

My reverie was stopped by my arrival at the mall. I once again asked myself if this was what I wanted to do. I had no hesitation as I told myself, yes! I drove into the mall parking lot and drove around to the section outside the Macy's store. I saw Harris' bright red Mazda convertible and pulled in beside him. He waved and walked around his car to slide into the seat beside me. He leaned over and pulled me tight against him as he kissed me hard. I returned his kiss and I opened my lips to allow his tongue to enter me. As his tongue moved in and out of my mouth in rapid motions, I reached down to feel him already aroused. I stroked him gently, being careful not to do too much here in the car in public. We broke apart and walked together into the mall.

I did my shopping in record time, Harris right beside me all the time. When I checked the last item off my list, he leaned down and kissed me. "OK, you know where to go. I'm so horny I can't wait any longer. I'll see you there." With that, he spun around and almost ran out of the store. Laughing, I paid the bill for my purchase and walked to my car. I placed the bags in the trunk and then started the car.

I sat there for a few minutes, just talking to myself one last time. Did I or did I not want to do this. That argument was very short and before I had a chance to question my decision, I drove to the Hargrove Motel and around the back to the last row of doors. Room 158, that was the number Harris whispered to me before he ran out. I parked in front of that room, reached behind me to grab the small bag I had packed and placed in the car and went up to the door and knocked. Harris answered almost before I knocked twice. He pulled me in, laughing. I went, one quick, guilty look around to be certain and then the door closed.

Once inside, Harris grabbed me and for the next few minutes, was all hands and mouth. It was like High School, all over again. I had only a second to ask myself what I was doing here before his fingers entered me and all reluctance was gone. I helped him get rid of my carefully chosen black lacy bra and my matching panties and then he had me on the bed and was forcing his legs between mine. He was fingering me at the same time he was sucking on my nipples and I was so hot I couldn't decide what I wanted. He decided for me and before I could say or do anything, I felt the head of his cock spread my opening and then he was inside me. 

Fortunately I was wet already or he would have hurt me in his haste. I lay back and experienced only the second cock of my life. I was a virgin when Jeff took me the first time and that time was not very good. After that, I learned how to enjoy it and Jeff was a wonderful lover, always patient and caring, bringing me to orgasm every time. Harris had neither of those qualities and I noticed that immediately. The second thing I noticed was that he felt no different than Jeff inside me. I guess most men were the same size and their equipment was mostly the same. 

Harris was plunging into me with hard strokes. I raised my hips, trying to encourage him to slow down and allow me to enjoy it but he didn't seem to understand what I was trying to tell him. I raised my knees and he moved deeper inside but his strokes were so hard and fast, he couldn't last very long. Almost before I had time to enjoy what he was doing, I felt his pace suddenly increase, then he moaned and came. I felt his semen flood my insides before I was aware that he hadn't used a condom.

Harris stayed inside me for a few minutes as he slowly softened and then he pulled out and rolled over on his back. Once he caught his breath, he said, "Holy Jesus! That was outstanding! God, I've never cum so hard in my life!"

I lay there, hot, wet and horny and this kid was done? Not so fast! I raised myself up on my elbows and looked down at his sweaty face. "You may be done, Junior, but I'm hanging here with a load of your sperm inside me and nothing else. Where the hell are the condoms I told you to bring? And you left me hanging and I expect you to fix that and fix it very quickly. Like right now!"

With that, I pulled him over and took one hand and forced it between my legs. "If you can't get it up yet, then finger me till I cum. Hurry up, I need to cum so I can get myself cleaned up. Then we can do it with the condoms and you can take a little more time for me this time."

Harris took the hint and fingered me with enough energy to make me climax. I had to help him find my clit and then he seemed to know what to do. I let the climax run its course then I went into the bathroom and thoroughly cleaned myself out making sure all of the fluid was either so far up it would stay or far enough down that I could get it out with my small douche kit, part of my emergency bag. I was taking no chance that any evidence of Harris could leak out and betray me. No way was my husband ever going to find out about this.

By the time I came back out of the bathroom, Harris was laying back, his hands behind his head and his cock standing almost straight up, already dressed in a pink condom. "I'm ready to go again, so come over here and this time you can do the honors." 

I smiled at the sight and sighed. This could be a lot of fun. His youth had one big advantage over my husband; he could be ready in no time. I climbed onto the bed, threw one leg over his prone form and then squatted directly over his hard cock. I took it in one hand, positioned it between my lips, now lubricated with a little K-Y, and dropped down, taking him completely inside me in one stroke. I slowly rose and then dropped again, over and over, slowly increasing my pace as I felt the lovely feeling come creeping slowly over my body. This I loved; controlling the pace and making sure I was satisfied. 

Harris took my breasts in his hands and twisted the nipples as I moved on him. The feeling was so intense, I felt a climax roaring up on me. I came so hard that I almost stopped fucking him but I continued and had two more climaxes before he gripped my hips and held me tight on his cock. He ejaculated inside the condom but I could feel his cock twitch with each spurt. I fell forward onto his chest and we slowly came down together.

We spent the next four hours together in that room, fucking in every conceivable position. Harris was able to get hard even after cuming. Sometimes he didn't even get soft between times. I was like a woman possessed and had to do everything I could imagine. I even had him try to enter my ass but it hurt so much, I made him quit. I was ready to quit but Harris begged me to do him once more, using my mouth. I have to be honest; I hated doing that but he had already brought me to one crashing climax with his mouth on my clit so I felt I had to return the favor. It was not fun, but he came quickly and then I was done. I went into the bathroom, spit his fluid out and brushed my teeth, rinsing with mouthwash.

As I washed up, putting my lipstick and makeup back in place, I noticed that it was already past six o'clock. I almost panicked then, my usual time for coming home was four or four thirty at the latest. I hadn't noticed the time passing. I reached for my phone, then decided that it was too late to call. I hurried out of the bathroom, now fully dressed and ready to go home. I would have to make up some story that would satisfy Jeff. 

As I walked into the room, Harris was dressed as well. He smiled at me. "This afternoon had been the best day of my life. You are fantastic and I hope we can do this again very soon."

I had asked myself the same question as I put my lipstick back on. Should I do this again? I examined my feelings and I felt a small seed of guilt that was trying to find its way out. I decided I needed time to answer his question. "I don't know, Harris. This was great and I enjoyed the time with you, but I'm married and I don't know how I feel about cheating on my husband."

Harris tried to convince me that it was just sex and didn't have anything to do with my marriage but I wasn't sure. We parted and I promised to talk to him next week. He watched me pull out and when I looked back, he was standing beside his car and he waved. I drove home, my thoughts on the afternoon and the experiences I had. 

I knew that I didn't love Harris and never could. I did love Jeff but we were having problems and that was something I had to work on. I did enjoy my afternoon with Harris but I thought that there was little difference in the sex with Harris and Jeff. Jeff and I made love, or at least we had before the recent problems. Harris had more stamina but Jeff had more finesse. The only reason I enjoyed this afternoon was that sex with Harris was illicit and there was a small kernel of excitement about that. But my last thought as I pulled into the driveway was, 'was it really worth the chance of damaging my marriage?'




Consequences - Samantha



I walked into the house, my mind still with Harris and the time we spent together. I was so involved with my thoughts I didn't see the empty boxes in the garage, the mess in the kitchen, or the stacks of dishes in the sink. As I walked through the kitchen and down the hallway, I didn't notice the extra chairs in the living room or the banner stretched across the family room over the fireplace. My mind elsewhere, I walked upstairs to the bedroom to change my clothes and get rid of the tight jeans and the see-through blouse before Jeff could see it. 

I was humming to myself, the pleasure of my afternoon with Harris still coursing through my blood, the heat of the time we spent together making my face burn. I also could feel the soreness between my legs and I knew that I would feel worse tomorrow. I thought then that it was a good thing Jeff and I hadn't been intimate for some time. He wouldn't be likely to notice anything amiss. I walked into the bedroom and almost ran into Jeff standing just inside the doorway. I stopped in confusion as I took in his presence.

"Jeff! You scared me! What are you doing standing there?" I was beginning to panic, my top was half off and I suddenly realized that the blouse and my tight jeans were visible to Jeff if he looked. I quickly pulled my top down again as I tried to push past him. It was not to be as he blocked my path and then asked me a question that I wasn't expecting.

"Where were you? Where have you been and who were you with?" Jeff's voice was harsh and cruel and it took my breath away. I stopped, stepped back and stared into his eyes. They were cold and hard. That was the first thought that came into my head. Jeff's eyes were so different, more different than I had ever seen them. He had light gray eyes that normally sparkled when he looked at me, but now they seemed darker, less alive, more steel gray than before. Why were his eyes so different?

As his words penetrated, I gasped and thought to myself that he knew! But he couldn't know! I had been so careful, so sure of myself. I had never mentioned Harris in my conversations, never mentioned our lunches, or our time together at work. No! He couldn't have any idea of where I had been that afternoon. He was just upset at how late I was. That was all it was. I had to go on the attack! I had to distract him!

"What are you talking about, Jeff? I was at the mall all afternoon. The packages are in the car and I need you or Brad to go get them. They're in the trunk. And I was by myself, just like always. I'm sorry I'm so late but I had some trouble finding everything and then I decided to get a bite to eat before coming home. That's all."

Jeff didn't say anything but he grabbed me by the hand and dragged me from the room, down the steps and into the kitchen. I tried to resist but he didn't even pause. He wasn't very gentle about it but I was almost afraid to say anything to him. I stumbled after him, my heart beginning to pound in my chest and I was having trouble breathing naturally. I was beginning to feel a deep dread in the pit of my stomach. 

Jeff stopped in the middle of the kitchen and pointed. "Look! What do you see? What do you see, Sam?"

I looked and now saw the dishes and the boxes and the printing on the sides of some of the boxes indicating 'Prentice Catering'. There were containers full of food and deserts, some nested inside other, the food spoiled. I looked around and now began to see all of those things I missed when I came home, my mind then still in the motel room with Harris.

"What. . . .? What did you do, Jeff? And where did all of this come from? Who was here? Do you. . . . . " 

I looked around and could see the chairs and the banner from where I stood in the kitchen. Now I knew what happened: there was a party for me and while everyone was here, I was with him, in bed! How could I explain? What could I say? And why did Jeff and the twins do this after I told them not to? Of course they would still try to celebrate my birthday! They would do this for me! After all, they loved me! Oh, God! Oh, God, what have I done? What have I done?

Then the tears started, the pain of my betrayal slamming into me so very hard. "Jeff, I'm sorry. I didn't know so I didn't come home on time. It was just a mistake and I'm so sorry, but I didn't know you were going to have a party. You should have told me and I would have been home. I'll let everyone know it was my fault."

Jeff was not moving. He continued to stare at me and his eyes remained cold. I was beginning to feel that sense of dread grow. I had to get past this and make it up to Jeff and get his attention off of me. I felt exposed and unsure of myself. I had to get upstairs and change so that I could work on Jeff and make him forget this.

"Jeff, let me get changed and then you can tell me who was here so I can. . . . . ." 

Jeff interrupted me with his next comment. "Who were you with! I asked you before and you didn't answer me. Who were you with today?"

"I was by myself! I told you that! Why are you asking me this?" I decided that I had to attack him to offset my confusion. Why would he ask me that? 

Instead of being distracted, Jeff snarled, "Who were you with this afternoon for five hours in room 158 at the Hargrove Motel! Who were you fucking in that room today? Whose cock were you sucking in that room today? Answer me that, Samantha! Answer me that!"

Oh, God! He knew! He knew everything! Oh, my God, my God! I had no answer! I couldn't get my mind to function. All I could hear were those damning words from my husband's mouth. I was choking, my throat was closing up and my eyes were burning, the fear so intense I almost collapsed. 

Jeff was furious and I had no idea what to do. What could I say? What could I do? I had to do something! I had to do something! But before I could say or do anything, Jeff walked toward me, reached down to grab my top by the bottom-edge and ripped it up and over my head, exposing my see-through blouse. The worst part of it was that now I was without my black lacy bra! He pulled it so hard, my arms went up without my intention and he tore the top off. He tossed it aside and stood, arms on his hips and disgust on his face, looking at my naked breasts exposed by the blouse.

I tried to cover myself but Jeff would have none of it. He grabbed my hands and pulled them apart. Then in a shocking move, he ripped the blouse open, exposing the bite marks and the swollen nipples that were still sensitive and bruised where Harris had bitten and pinched them. The tingle that I had earlier, the pleasure I felt when Harris was using me, was gone and now I felt only the pain. 

My humiliation complete, I sobbed and pushed past Jeff and ran back upstairs and into the bathroom but he followed me and held the door open when I tried to close it. I was crying and screaming at him to get out, but he refused to move. I went in anyway, and took off my tight jeans. I had washed myself out before coming home but my labia was swollen and red. There were bite marks on my thighs that I hadn't noticed and my panties were missing. I had forgotten that in my haste to get out of those damned jeans I had given my bra and panties to Harris as a reminder of our time together!

I realized as I stood there, naked and exposed to my husband, the marks of my betrayal clear to him, that Jeff knew everything. I thought I had covered myself so well, and that this afternoon would be my secret and my salvation. Now I knew better and I was so ashamed. Now that it was over, and I had been caught, the fear of what could happen came to my mind. Up till now, I had considered only my pleasure, my illicit intentions and what I would gain by it, but never once had I considered the consequences of exposure. Never once had I considered what I could lose. The consequences of my actions that afternoon never entered my mind.

I reached for my robe, the one I kept behind the door for after showers and put it on. I pulled it tight to cover my body, trying to block the evidence of my betrayal from Jeff. Even that wasn't enough so I wrapped my arms tightly around my chest and held myself. I couldn't look at Jeff, unable to meet the eyes that I had seen downstairs. I couldn't stand to see that pain, that lost look. And I didn't want him to look at me. I was suddenly ashamed of my nakedness and I was ashamed for my husband to see me. I wanted only to cover myself and hide myself from his knowing eyes. I wanted that, but it wasn't to be.

"Get yourself downstairs, right now. We have things to talk about and we have to do it now. Amy and Brad are with your mother for the night. She took them when she left. They were here, along with my parents, for the party."

"Jeff, what. . . . . .?" Jeff just ignored me and went out the door and down the stairs, leaving me standing there. I didn't know what to do but I didn't want to have the conversation I knew was coming. I thought that if I didn't go down, it couldn't start. But like my foolish decision about what I did today, I knew this was also a foolish thought. I walked slowly down the stairs, holding onto the railing to prevent myself from falling. My legs were wobbly and I felt faint.

I walked slowly into the kitchen, pushed aside a stack of boxes, not caring where they fell, and sat down at the table. Jeff was already sitting, staring at the tabletop. As I looked at him, I felt some relief that I couldn't see his eyes now, but I did see a tear roll down his cheek. That took my breath away! How could one little tear do that? But it did and it told me more by itself than a thousand words could say. I knew then my selfish actions had hurt Jeff so very bad and suddenly I saw the result of my actions clearly. My feeling of dread was now in full force!

"What do the children know? Jeff, what do they know? Please tell me." I was hoping against hope that they knew nothing.

"They know, Sam. I'm sorry but they know." Jeff still wouldn't look at me, but his words were like a slap to the face.

"Why would you tell them, Jeff? Why would you hurt them before talking to me? Why would you do that?" I was angry; angry at Jeff for telling them and angry at myself for making it possible to hurt them.

"I didn't tell them, Sam! They overheard your sister tell me. It was an accident really, just a stupid accident. Patty just stumbled into it. It was her job to follow you today to make sure you didn't come home too early when we were still setting up, and then to let us know when you started for home so we get ready to spring up and yell 'surprise' when you walked through the door. She was just protecting our surprise for you."

Jeff sat up straight, his eyes drilling into mine. I noticed without thinking how red his eyes were now. I asked myself why they would be red. I answered my own question: crying, of course. How stupid of me.

"Patty followed you and then when she saw you with some man, she got interested. She followed the two of you out to your car and watched you kiss him. She said the way you were kissing told her that something was wrong. She ran to her car and got it in time to follow your car to the Hargrove Motel a couple of blocks away. She watched you and that man go into room 158 and then waited for ten minutes. When you didn't come back out, she walked up to the room and was able to peek into the window where the drapes didn't come completely together. She saw enough."

Jeff was now without emotion. He continued, his voice becoming more and more cold and remote as he relayed the information my sister had given him. 

"She drove home to let me know what she saw. She was sobbing and almost hysterical but she wasn't going to tell me. I made her sit down and take a breath and then tell me what was bothering her. She didn't want to, knowing it was going to hurt me, but with everyone here and waiting to surprise you, she had little choice. As she was telling me what she saw, I looked around and saw Amy and Brad standing there. They heard it all."

"Oh, God, Jeff. What did they do? What did they say? Oh, God, what have I done?"

"They were crushed when they heard Patty tell me what you were doing. Amy broke down and cried and Brad just stood there, cursing. I didn't even try to stop him. I let them alone until they were done, and once they had let it out, I tried to talk to them and calm them down. It took some time, and then I had Patty talk to your mom and dad to let them know what happened. That had to be done so that they could handle Amy and Brad tonight."

I listened in absolute horror. How had it all come apart so quickly and so completely? One afternoon, just a simple decision to do something I had never before considered and this was the result. My family broken, my parents and my children aware of it all and my husband. . . . . Was there any hope for me? Could I put my family back together after this? I stopped my stupid crying and tried to pull myself together. I had to try, to do whatever I could to make this right.

"Jeff, what now? Can you ever find it in your heart to forgive me? I swear to you that this was the first and only time I've ever done anything like this, and I can promise you it will never happen again. Never!"

I stood and walked around the table to stand next to Jeff. I put my hand on his shoulder, to comfort him but he angrily pushed me away. I stood back, my shock at his anger bringing a new batch of tears as I waited for his answer.

"I don't think there's any way that can happen now, Sam. You see, I made a mistake today as well. When Patty told me what you were doing, I had to see for myself. I didn't believe you would do something like that to us. I just couldn't believe it. So, I went to the motel myself while the party was breaking up. I parked my car and walked up to room 158 and looked for the break in the curtains that Patty told me about. I found it and I looked."

"Oh, God, no! You didn't see me! Jeff, please tell me you didn't see me and what I did! Jeff, please tell me you didn't see anything! Jeff, please?"

"I can't, Sam, I can't. I saw you on that bed, him behind you with both of his hands on your tits as he slammed into you over and over. And the look on your face was enough to make me sick! You were consumed with lust and your face was twisted in a way I never saw before. Oh yes, Sam, I saw you. And it broke my heart."

Jeff was crying openly now. Tears were coursing down his cheeks and dripping onto the tabletop. I saw them and I knew. It was too late!

He got up, walked upstairs and came back down carrying two suitcases. He had packed earlier and was ready.

"I'm leaving now, Sam. I'll file the papers first thing Monday morning. We can split everything evenly, including custody of the kids. Since this is a no-fault state, there should be no problem. Brad and Amy already know my intentions and they have accepted it. They're old enough to get by.

"I don't know what you'll tell them, but I trust you with that, at least. I didn't say much more than I couldn't accept what you've done and that I need to file for this divorce. We discussed it; they wanted to see if I couldn't get past this, but I told them there was no way that could ever happen. Finally they accepted it and said they would stay here with you. They're good kids and they won't hold it against you for long. They're young and they'll forgive and forget. They will, but I can't. I'm sorry, I just can't."

"Jeff, please, don't do this. I love you with all my heart and I'm sorry! I swear I'll do anything you ask to make this up to you. Please don't leave me like this. We have to talk, to see how we can get past this and go on. We have two wonderful children and they need both of us. Jeff, please give me another chance."

I was sobbing and choking the words out but I had to try. I had to make one last effort, even if it was too little, too late. I had to try. But when he looked at me, and I saw the pain in his face and the lack of hope, I knew his answer.

"I'm sorry, Sam, but I can't do it. I can't!" With that, he turned and stumbled out the door and out of my life.

The divorce went through just like Jeff said. No fault means just that to the courts. They don't ask for counseling, although I begged Jeff's lawyer for him to join me in therapy. They don't ask for conversations and compromises, although I begged Jeff's lawyer for those as well. I refused to sign until Jeff would let me talk to him but his lawyer said that the divorce would continue anyway, with or without my signature. When I wanted to talk about visitation, again his lawyer said that would be decided by the court if I objected to sharing custody. He said joint custody is common and unless there is reason to abridge that, joint means joint and that's that. As to a conversation, Jeff refused to discuss my brief affair with Harris and said that nothing I said would change anything. He said that what I did was what caused him to divorce me. The why of it was not important to him. I had no answer for that. 

I never spoke to Harris again. When he heard about my divorce, he left the firm and I never heard from him again. Of course, that was fine with me since I no longer felt anything for him. I tried to talk with Jeff but that was quickly shut down. He wanted nothing to do with me. My kids were a problem for a while but they soon forgave me just as Jeff said. Brad was worse than Amy but he eventually got past it although we aren't as close as we used to be. I hope that will change with time. They are my only contact with Jeff now. He won't even talk to me when he comes to pick them up.

That day, the day Jeff walked out, was my fortieth birthday. That was five years ago and I still remember it. I remember everything from the minute I walked into my house that day like it was yesterday. But the hours before that are different. It's strange that I can't remember that afternoon with Harris. When I try to think about that afternoon, I get sick to my stomach and that's followed by a splitting headache that lasts for hours. Strange, isn't it? The most important day of my life and I can't even remember that part of it. That's just one of the consequences of trying to remember something so terrible it ruined your life. Unfortunately there were so many more.

Consequences are a bitch!