10 comments/ 42565 views/ 33 favorites In More Ways Than One By: lovewords I was 19 and in my sophomore year of college when I met him. He was a 21 year old senior whom I worshipped. Maybe worshipped isn't the right word, I deified him. He was like a god to me, a tawny haired, built like a stallion, crystal clear green eyed god. The moment I laid eyes on him I was certain that he was part of my destiny. His name was Cian and he had the attention of practically every woman on campus. I did not presume to think, even then, that I was the finest woman walking the earth or who attended MTSU for that matter but I knew, without a doubt, the first time I looked into those green orbs and they met my brown pools that I would have him, in every way that it is possible to have a person. Cian was attending a party on campus the first time he saw her. He was with his boys as usual Malachi, Dillon and Niall. She was walking through the crowded room when she caught his eye. She looked to be about 5"4 he guessed, skin the color of pecans, he loved pecans, an athletic body that looked soft and yet firm. His eyes, of their own volition, followed her. He didn't like black chicks. Nothing personal, he just never paid them much attention. This black girl however interested him very much. There was something about her that made him want to talk to her he mused. But then, no he wouldn't kid himself. The moment he saw her he wanted to fuck her so bad his dick swelled, rock hard, in his pants just from looking at her. When she noticed that he was looking at her and their eyes met he knew without a doubt that he would fuck her, and he would fuck her like he owned her! He couldn't wait********* But she did, make him wait. This was not something Cian had ever had to do and he couldn't figure out why he was still hanging out with her—waiting. It had been a couple of months and he had been screwing everything that came within 10 feet of him and yet he was still wound up tight from wanting her so bad*********** I don't know what it was exactly that I felt as I ascended the stairs, my hand in Cian's as he pulled me along behind him. My heart raced and I was having trouble swallowing the lump that had formed in my throat. He drank deeply from the beer in his hand. The place was crowded and I tried my best to avoid the gazes of the people we passed. It seemed like they were all speculating on what I did not even acknowledge to myself, that after this night I would probably no longer be a virgin. I had meant to wait until I was married and I had definitely pictured a different setting but if I was certain of anything it was that I was deeply in love with Cian McNamara. I knew that he knew and he also knew that I would do just about anything that he asked me to, hence the trip to his room for some "privacy" with a fully fledged party going on around us. "I see you've cleaned up" I said as he closed his bedroom door and turned on a lamp to light the room some. Something else I knew about me, I have a really good poker face, while being able to read others pretty easily. In the case of Cian though, I had no such insight. Cian turned on some music, Stigma, if I remembered what he'd told me correctly. He was nothing if not proud of his Irish heritage. I liked the rhythm of the song and could swear I felt it in his kisses. His fingers were like flames, they burnt everywhere that they touched. "What are you doing?" I asked him as he started to unzip my pants. His response was to tug on my bottom lip pretty hard. He moved away from me and stretched out on his bed arms across his eyes. He sighed heavily. I knew that sigh very well. "Why do you keep fucking with me?!" It didn't sound at all like a question. "I'm not – fucking with you" I told him. I knew that my voice shook with the need to reassure him, to have his approval because a second later he sat up and looked at me calling me over to sit next to him. He pressed me down onto my back moving on top of me and kissing me deeply, smiling, as he gazed directly into my eyes. He had learned my secret. I could not say no to him if his crystal green orbs were holding my chocolate brown ones captive. That is the only way I can describe it, his eyes burned straight through to my soul and made me ache for him, for his touch, for whatever he would give me. "I want you" he told me in that moment and then "Are you my girl?" he asked with a smirk. I wanted him to love me and since I had never been there before I had no idea the path that it could take. "Yes I am" I told him still looking into his eyes, still giving away my secrets. His fingers touched me there. We both knew that I was drenched for him but I had to make a final protest, it wasn't supposed to happen this way. "Y-you want to do this right now" I stilled his fingers. They were driving me crazy and I could barely think coherently. "Hell yeah" he nipped my neck with his teeth continuing to rub my clitoris. "I don't think now is a good idea." His entire body stiffened. "Why not?" "You've been drinking." "I'll remember what happens in the morning I promise" he laughed. And with that he started to tug on my jeans. I mentally hyperventilated freaking out that this was really happening as he pulled my pants completely off. He stood over me, looking down at my now naked body. His eyes soaked me up like he was a dry sponge and I was water. I watched as he opened a condom packet while stepping out of his boxers. He was long and so thick I couldn't take my eyes off of it. He was rough as he entered me. It felt like he was ripping me apart as he forced his way into my body. I nearly jumped out of my skin at the pain that surged through me when he tore away my innocence. I gasped loudly. Our eyes locked on each other I could see the shock in his, the look that asked me to tell him something other than what he had just felt. I guiltily turned away from that stare and then he started to move deeply into me pulling out almost completely over and over and over, forcefully. The more I whimpered and called out to him the faster and harder he moved in me. My body, of its own accord, decided to respond to him anyway. Soon I was too slick to feel any pain. I began to move against his thrusts and he began to moan against my mouth, my neck, my breasts. When I fell I shattered into a thousand microscopic pieces, moments after he came shuddering hard against me. He only rested on me for a second or two and then he got up going into the bathroom slamming the door. Cian was pissed; no he was more than pissed! He stood looking at himself in the mirror for lack of any better idea. He felt deceived. He had no idea she was a fucking virgin! Her whimpers even now invaded his head making his dick hard, it had one word on its brain, MINE! He knew he was in trouble. Somewhere along the way his anger had turned to pure need and he'd stopped fucking her, probably when her hands spread up his back making him burn. When instead of trying to push him away she'd clung to him, every part of her clung to ever part of him. FUCK! His dick was starting to ache it was so hard thinking about that. He looked into the mirror again then smiled at himself as he put on his game face and left the bathroom. She was still lying in the middle of his bed covered by a sheet. "Get on your clothes" he told her picking them up from the floor. When she stammered and looked confused he knew he was in control again. He'd dropped her off and now he lay in his bed, at first feeling satisfied until her scent began to drift up from his sheet and then as a result his dick began to stand straight up, painfully. He could have changed the sheets but he didn't move to do so. He couldn't get her off his mind. A little voice told him to be honest with himself, that panic he'd felt in the bathroom was real and he should just accept that he had just been fucked, in more ways than one. In More Ways Than One Ch. 02 I was more and more tired lately of his screwing me and then leaving. Some days things between us were so good, better than good but some days his life got in the way. Even after more than three years together he was still not ready to admit to loving me. Not to his Irish brethren, who knew better. Not to the world. And was I okay with that? No. I watched Cian while lying on my back in my bed, as pissed off as I was able to be at this point. He moved around my bedroom pulling on his clothes. I could tell from the expression on his face that he was already somewhere else mentally. Which door tonight? I thought. Door A: I spend the night alone crying in my bed. Door B: I go out with friends and drown my thoughts in alcohol—Fuck it! "Where are you going?" I asked him again. He acted like he didn't hear me and continued to get dressed. This was the third or fourth time. Deciding I'd had enough of his ignoring me I jumped up from the bed, still completely naked, and grabbed his keys. "What the fuck are you doing Keya" he snapped at me then without pausing "Give me my fucking keys." As he lunged for them I moved out of the way. My only option was to run into the bathroom and lock the door, which I did. In the bathroom silent tears trailed down my face. I angrily swiped at them. "I am so damn tired of this Cian" I yelled from behind the locked door. "I have to go. Give me my keys" he said again, highly impatient this time. "No." "Open this fucking door before I beat it down" he growled pounding hard on it enough to frighten me. "Fine" I came out. "Here are you stupid fucking keys" and then I tossed them onto the floor. His cell phone beeped again, like it had been doing for the past hour. He looked at it, picked up his keys from where they'd landed. He kissed me on the cheek and then left. ^^^^^^^ When I met Cian Three years ago when Cian and I met I would have never thought that falling in love could be so damned painful. I hated him most of the time. I hated that I had gone to law school and he had gone into the family business after college which kept him busier than my law school classes. His behavior lately hadn't been about having to work. It was about the redhead he'd been fucking for the past few months. Part of me wanted nothing more than to let go of him but I just couldn't. Rihanna was right when she said it was like an addiction because somewhere along the way my life had begun to revolve around Cian. After our first night together he had tried to stay away from me and when he found he couldn't I told him I would stay away from him. Although I was better at staying away than he, it didn't change a thing. If I wasn't in his bed most every night or he wasn't in mine it was he who came looking for me. The first time that I went out with someone else he beat the living breath out of this guy and told me I'd better not ever do some shit like that again. This had come three days after him telling me he couldn't see me anymore. As time went on I began to want him with a really deep hunger and need. I was sure he felt the same for me. After all, I had become a part of his life. Even his friends began to see me as a permanent fixture in his life. I think the only one who didn't see it was him. The guys would tease him mercilessly, Aidan especially. Aidan was more than a little racist and couldn't understand his friend's fixation with me. Still as messy as our relationship was I was happy to be with him, I felt at home in his arms and with him between my legs. I would have been content to love him forever because he made me feel like I belonged to him, with him. It was intoxicating. At least until Jenny happened. ^^^^^^^ The Jenny Situation I had rushed over from my last class to Cian's apartment. I was excited about a grade I'd received in a class I and was in a hurry to celebrate. It was almost six o'clock in the afternoon. It had been raining earlier and was still wet out but the skies had cleared at least. There was obviously a party going on when I pulled up because there were cars parked everywhere. I bypassed the smoke filled living room, the people I didn't know and went directly into his bedroom where I found a pretty blond lying underneath his blanket, totally naked. She'd jumped a little when she saw me. I guess I had startled her by coming into the room unannounced, then following her gaze across the room both our eyes landed on a naked Cian. He looked like he had just gotten out of the shower. In the next second I was all over her, I mean literally. I wanted to kill her. It took Cian, Niall and someone else to pull me away from her while Aidan stood smirking in the doorway. I had never felt so much pain in my life as Cian's two goons still held me and he had the nerve right in front of me to hold her and check on her. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" he barely spared me a glance. What was wrong with me? This coming from the same asshole that was known to explode in a murderous rage with little or no provocation. I only told you about the first guy he beat down. That guy was far from the last. Who the hell did he think I'd gotten my temper from? He'd completely rubbed off on me. I wasn't the same shy and timid girl he'd met at a frat party. What was wrong with me? He was what was wrong with me. Watching him tilt her bloody face up to his tears began to slip out of my eyes of their own accord. I felt like I was bleeding to death and he was taking care of her. "Get off me." I yanked as hard as I could and the guys who were still holding me tight released me probably because they heard my sobs and knew I wasn't going to do anything else. Cian had taken her into the bathroom anyway. ^^^^^^^ After the Jenny incident Cian and I stopped all forms of communication. The first thing I did was cut my hair. I had let it grow out but now I cut it so short it couldn't be gripped or pulled. Cian loved to pull and tug at my hair during sex and if he was mad at me. It was over and I was going to be happy. Zabrine, a guy from my job asked me out after giving me a compliment on my new hairstyle one day. Zabrine was sexy, tall cocoa colored skin, athletic build not too muscular but just right. I said yes. He took me to a new place called The Underground. We grabbed a table, ordered some drinks, and then he asked me to dance. On the packed dance floor I had to yell to be heard over the music. "Why did you bring me here Zabrine?" Of all places. This place was like any other Irish pub that I had begun to frequent since being with Cian. He caught the uneasy way that I was looking around. "Oh I'm half Irish" he said against my ear. Of course I thought. I nodded to him while laughing inside at the irony of the situation. A slower song came on, he pulled me close and whispered that my dress looked phenomenal on me, felt phenomenal on me. His hands slowly and softly traveled up and down the length of my bare back and lower still. His thumbs grazed my breasts. I was not wearing a bra and he was turning me on. In his arms I was surprised not only by my arousal but by how I wasn't thinking of Cian every second. When he asked me if I wanted to get out of the place I felt I was ready and I said yes. He held my hand as he pulled me through the crowd toward the coat room. I admit that I was looking at his ass in his jeans and not where I was walking until I ran into a solid wall. Actually it was Niall. I looked up to apologize and froze when I saw his huge self right in my way. It was something about the way he was looking at me. "Hi, how are you?" he asked but he didn't move out of my way. Getting Niall to say more than that was like pulling teeth. Sometimes I thought if he wanted he would make a great bodyguard or bouncer. I wasn't in the mood to be polite. "Are you going to move?" I snapped. "Yeah" he said. And when he did I saw that his huge frame had been covering the fact that Cian was across the way looking at me. My head snapped around before I could tell it not to. I was trying to gauge how much he could have seen on the dance floor. Slowly my eyes crept back to Cian's. He had this grin on his face like he knew what I was thinking. Even from as far away as we were I could tell the smile didn't reach his eyes. I was mad that seeing Cian had killed the desire that I had been working up to all night with Zabrine. Still I allowed Zabrine to take me home and even kiss me. Tasting his mouth was like eating warm butterscotch candy, I probably would have sucked on his tongue all night if he hadn't been the one to pull away. I guessed that he needed to breathe. "So can we continue this upstairs?" he asked. "N-Not tonight" I said as firmly as I could. "Well this will have to do me for now" he said and leaned down to take my mouth again. ^^^^^^^ Later that night It was after two a.m. I had showered put on a pair of white boy shorts and a t-shirt standing at the kitchen counter. I was eating ice cream while listening to a movie play on the TV in my living room. This fucking sucks I thought. Two seconds later I heard my front door open. I almost screamed when Cian appeared in the doorway seconds later. I sat my ice cream down on the counter top as anger replaced the fear in my veins. "What the fuck are you doing here?" I growled at him. He remained calm, relaxed looking but I could tell by his stormy eyes that he was anything but. "Who is he" he asked casually. "Excuse me?" He began to walk toward me, his eyes, locked into mine. "Who the fuck is he?" "You don't have any right to-- "I have every right" he bellowed. He stood within two inches of my face. With my back against the counter he reached me and picked up my ice cream taking a few bites before putting it down again. One of his hands then went up my shirt. He solely managed to get it over my head while he toyed with one of my nipples. As soon as my shirt was removed he replaced his fingers with his mouth. He sucked hard enough to make me whimper. I wanted to resist him. I really did. He slid his hand into my shorts and began to finger fuck me. I was hot and wet in seconds. His fingers were large and thick. They made me ache and gasp. "D-don't" I said as he began to use those fingers curving upward toward my g spot, his hand now dripping with my flowing cream. I was almost, almost there when he stopped abruptly pulling away his mouth and hand. "You want me to go?" he asked looking into my face which I turned from him and he promptly turned back to his. I knew that my hurt, pain, and anger were visible for him to see. "It's just not the same" I told him, meaning it. "What are you saying?" He was met with silence. I was weakening. I didn't want him to go and I didn't want him to stay either. He picked me up and I had no choice but to wrap my legs around his waist as he wasn't letting me go. Up against the wall he fucked me, so hard, so deep. When he tried to kiss me all I could think of was the girl I'd found in his bedroom and I turned my head away from his lips. He quickened his pace and deepened his strokes. I could barely catch my breath. I became like a rag doll in his arms, legs spread wide apart while he fucked me up and down on his dick. I came milking him, clawing at his back, screaming. When he got ready to cum he laid me on the counter. We were barely finished when his phone rang. He snatched it open. "Yeah" he said still sliding in and out of me. "No" he eyed me. "Not tonight". He closed his phone turned it off and took me to bed. ^^^^^^^ Things were perfect for a while, after that. So how did I get to the point where I am practically groveling for his attention, well, I told you that he works in the family business. It keeps him very busy. A couple of weeks after the Zabrine episode we were arguing about where he was going. I would ask he would say to do stuff and then he would leave anytime day or night. I guessed he thought because we were now living together that I would be satisfied with him being gone so often. I wasn't. "I barely see you Cian" I told him after one such argument. "And when I do you're too busy to do anything other than fuck and leave." "What the hell am I supposed to think?"I yelled at him. "That I am working" he shouted back. ^^^^^^^ Well sometimes he was and sometimes he wasn't which leads me back to where I started, watching him walk out of our place to go to her, whoever she happened to be hurt me deeply but I wasn't going anywhere and we both knew that. ^^^^^^^ The ringing of my phone woke me from my revelry. I knew who it was by looking at the caller id. "What the fuck do you want?" "You know what the fuck I want." "Well I just fucked Cian." If it could be called that. He'd spent maybe ten minutes inside me and then he'd gotten the text. Whoever she was she was coming to mean a lot to him. "Hey, you there?" "Yes, Aidan." "Can I come see you then?" "I just fucking told you!" "I'll be there in maybe fifteen" he hung up the line. To be continued... In More Ways Than One Ch. 03 ^^^^^^^ Cian had been leaving Aidan to "babysit" me for months. Every time I asked him to take me somewhere or do something and he was busy he had one of his friend's take me and usually it was Aidan. On one such evening Aidan and I were in my living room, he on the couch, me pacing a hole in the floor trying to get him to tell me the whereabouts of Cian. He just continued to smirk at me as I asked and as I kept envisioning myself slapping him across his face. "Do you want?" he asked holding out the blunt he had just lit. " Just tell me where he is" I said again. "He's with the redhead isn't he?" I snapped when he still didn't answer. "If you know then stop asking me already" he almost shouted like I was working his last nerve. "And sit down that pacing is making me paranoid." He relaxed back into the cushions of the couch. I went over to him and took the blunt from his hand inhaling like I hadn't since the few times I'd tried the stuff in college. It helped to calm me down enough so that I sat on the floor and started to watch this movie that Aidan had been trying to. By the end of it we were both cracking up. We also continued to keep passing the blunt between us both trying to not touch the other, which was sort of ridiculous. We ended up pausing the movie so we could grab something to eat. As we started to raid my fridge I noticed the time. It was getting late and I had to be at work pretty early. I also realized that Cian must not be coming home. Grabbing my food I sat back on the floor across from Aidan using my coffee table as a plate holder and finishing up the movie. The juice from my slices of fruit,slid down my hand. I carelessly licked it off instead of using a napkin. When I turned to ask Aidan if he had seen what I just had on the tv screen he quickly averted his eyes, but I had caught him--staring at me. I could have let it go but I didn't. "Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked him. "Like what?" It irritated me that he was playing dumb. "Like you were thinking about--- like you want to fuck me" I said deciding to be completely honest. "And if I do?" he shrugged blowing smoke into the air. "You don't even like black women, black people for that matter." "Says you." "No says your behavior." I glared at him. "He threw his head back and laughed." "What is so funny!" "Tell me one thing that I have ever said to make you think I was a racist, just one", he smirked. "I know when people are being racist towards me." "You sound like an idiot." "Fuck You Aidan." "What, was it my non verbal behavior that clued you in?" He said this in a condescending way and it pissed me off. I got up and walked over to him about to physically throw him out of my place. "And you're a lawyer?" he shook his head as he stood up, still pushing my buttons. I guess he knew what was coming. It wouldn't be the first time. In that moment I was so angry but all I could get out was a really good, "fuck you Aidan." "Okay" he leaned down closer to my face, "You don't have to beg". And with that he kissed me. I cannot describe all of the sensations that went through my body as his tongue invaded my mouth. I had been kissed plenty but never like this, with so much passion and restraint at the same time. I could literally taste the hunger he had for me and I had never been kissed so thoroughly that I forgot my own fucking name, where I was or what I was doing. When he pulled away my funky breathing was the least of my concerns. It hit me hard. I wanted this man in the worst way, in a way that I had never ever wanted anyone else. "He's not coming back tonight is he?"I asked pushing Aidan back onto the couch. Even to my own ears I knew the question hadn't been in the same tone as it had earlier. "He uh he told me he wasn't" he shrugged, for the first time not fully meeting my eyes. I sat on his lap and I kissed him again while rubbing my pussy against the rock hard dick in his jeans. There was just no faking with Aidan, not that night or any night after. Every moan, every scream, every pull of my nails down his back was due to my need to give him back what he was giving to me. At first I had worried that he would say something to Cian and then sometimes I wanted him to tell, but he never did. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ So Aidan showed up in exactly fifteen minutes after I ended the call.I opted for a shower not that I had worked up a sweat or anything. We sat on the couch in my living room, me pissed off, and him trying to make small talk. I guess waiting until I calmed down. Even though I was mad our eyes kept connecting until finally he moved closer to me and my opened robe.I had put on a pink lace panty set. I watched unable to move as he lowered his head to my throat. His lips were so soft. I closed my eyes against the feel of them trailing down my body. When he began to suck my nipples through the lace I opened my legs as my pussy was now pleading for attention. Without missing a beat his thumb started to circle my clit, rubbing it, circling and rubbing it some more. "Okay" I snapped at him. "I want it" I said. After the first time we had sex he had wanted to hear me say it before he gave me what we both craved. Aidan laid me back on the couch pulling my panties off and tossing them to the side. His overly long dark hair hung into his face covering up the prettiest brown eyes I'd ever seen on a guy. There was absolutely nothing feminine about Aidan though. He took his time with everything. No matter how I told him I needed it hard and fast he did exactly what he wanted to do. As he began to stroke in and out of me I knew it wouldn't be long before I came. His strokes were long and his dick filled every crevice in my pussy. In and out, in and out. It wasn't fast, it wasn't slow. I didn't like to let him know how much pleasure I was receiving from him but Aidan was a conqueror through and through. As I came I screamed and shook in his arms while he held me. I could feel his smile of triumph against my cheek. It always angered me. "Get off me" I pushed at him, once my tremors had passed. Without hesitation he moved away from me and stood up. I stood a few feet away with my robe still on and my arms crossed. He had that cocky assed smirk on his face as he took his dick in his hand and began to caress it in a circular motion.My eyes had no choice but to watch and before I knew it I was on my knees in front of him sucking him like there was no tomorrow. His hands were tugging my short hair as they guided my warm lips onto his stiff white cock. I deep throated him, something he'd taught me to do, and he stopped watching me. His eyes rolled and then he closed them. When he came he was so far down my throat I couldn't breathe. As I pulled back off him slowly I made sure to lick and swallow every ounce of cum that he was shooting while continuing to suck him. I then licked the outside clean while he jerked a little and then fell back onto the couch exhausted. Crazy as it sounds we went to bed together that night and many of the nights that came after it as well. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ "Who is she?" I asked this of Aidan the minute he came out of the bathroom from washing my scent from his body. I had barely seen Cian in the last few weeks. "Why? Are you going to leave him when I tell you?" When I said nothing he started to get dressed looking pissed. "What?" I asked. "You know what, why don't you just leave him?" "I love him" I yelled at Aidan. "Yeah I can fucking tell." "You don't know a thing about the way I feel." "What I have with Aidan is--" "Save it and the next time you think about calling me, don't!" He left my bedroom closing the door behind him. I could hardly breathe as he walked away from me. I wanted nothing more than to call him back and say—I don't know something that would make him stay. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Cian's side... It was late when Cian got in. He was more than a little tipsy as he swayed to the bathroom, showered and then got into bed next to Keya. She lay on her side with her back to him, as usual of late. Though he was tired he couldn't sleep. He thought about the ultimatum his father had put to him. He had never defied his father but he was seriously thinking about it now. It was either that or let her go and maybe nothing on earth was going to make him choose that option. He thought about all they had been through since he'd met her, all the lies he'd told her and the shit that he kept from her. Even though she didn't know it she was the only light in his otherwise pitch-black life. How many other little boys grew up with a father they had to fear as well as love? Cian's father was very powerful. He had seen him fuck people up and knew that he had people killed, and now Cian himself had joined the ranks. He couldn't, wouldn't tell Keya how fucking stressful his life was. Instead he took it out on her and he was wrong he knew, so fucking wrong! Back in college when he'd met her he was sure he was going to fuck her a couple of times, then send her own her way. It was his way. He had never had a problem with women, not since he was old enough to know what his dick was used for. He picked and chose them like he did his clothes. She was intriguing but so had many of the others been. That first time they'd been together it had surprised the shit out of him that she was a virgin. He had been consumed with an emotion he couldn't name, at the time. He hadn't meant to be so forceful. That little voice just rang in his head MINE, MINE, MINE! It was all he could do to not cum prematurely. Everything in his life that he had he got because of his dad. Money could buy a hell of a lot. Keya had not given a damn about his material worth. She'd said thank you but hadn't batted an eyelash when he bought her a jeep for her college graduation present and then a BMW when she graduated from law school. For all her "I can read you like a book" attitude, he knew damn well that she couldn't. It made him smile to know that she was innocent in so many ways. His phone rang just as he was drifting to sleep thinking of just that. "What" he answered his cell without checking to see who was calling. It was Victoria. "I was just calling to see if you made it home okay" she said. He glanced over to make sure that Keya was still asleep as he eased up from the bed going into the bathroom. "I told you if you need to reach me text me" the venom in his voice was strong, he knew. "I-I'm sorry she stuttered. Your dad asked me to call when you left". "Are you marrying my father or me?" he growled at her. When she remained silent he told her again to not CALL him, ever. She promised that she wouldn't. He wanted to throw his phone, fucking Victoria! As if his dad did not have enough money and power he wanted Cian to-- ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ "Where are you going?" Cian asked Keya. She'd come out of the bedroom dressed in a black pantsuit. Laughing she told him that she had work to do, as if he should have known that. "Can it wait?" he asked. "It is Sunday." Thinking about the text she'd received from Aidan earlier she told him it could not. "Fine" he teased as she headed out of the door. "Leave me all alone with nothing to do." "You'll be fine" she turned back around and kissed his forehead and left him there anyway, which surprised the fuck out of him. Their place was big but he needed some fucking fresh air and some advice. He hopped into his ride turned on some music and headed across town. ^^^^^^ Aidan was inside me as I lay on my back in his bed. My legs were wrapped around him still though we had both cum. So I guess this means were making up he rubbed the tip of his nose into my neck breathing in deeply and then planting kisses on my neck. I had just pulled his face back to mine for a kiss when his phone rang. I softly palmed his dick while he spoke. When he stiffened I paid more attention to the call. "How far away are you?" I heard him ask then "yep", "uhhuh", "okay" then he hung up. "God I think Malachi wants you or something" I teased him as he lay back down next to me. "He is always calling when were having sex, well him or Niall", I laughed. "That wasn't Malachi" he said. "Then who was it?" "Cian." A little buzz started in my ears. "Who?" I asked again. "Cian and he's about five minutes away", he said this in a very calm almost flat voice. He watched me, his eyes set to fury, as I shot out of his bed and grabbed for my clothes at break neck speed. "Fuck it" he sighed heavily sitting up and grabbing his shirt and then walking past me into his bathroom. "Didn't feel like fucking cleaning up any blood today anyway." He was speaking to himself but I heard. Although, the deadly serious way that he had delivered the statement really didn't need an explanation I hoped that he was joking, however inappropriate. "What do you mean?" I asked him. He closed the bathroom door with a soft thud leaving my question unanswered. I literally had ice in my veins and the little hairs on my arms stood up as I hurriedly pulled on my clothes... In More Ways Than One Ch. 04 Whomever said what you don't know can't hurt was a damned liar. It is precisely what you don't know that can kick you in the ass and send you reeling. Ever since the day I jetted from Aidan's his words had kept replaying in my mind, over and over again. That day seemed to awaken me from some post adolescent pansy-assed bullshit nightmare. I'm sure I'm not the first one. ********* With eyes wide open now for the past few weeks I have been watching Aidan, Cian, Niall, and the rest and what I've found has frightened the hell out of me to the point that I no longer sleep well. Things have so changed between Aidan and me. I think he's seen it in my eyes, the fear, the understanding. The fact that he is the one who planted the seed in my mind satisfies him on some level. When I was still able to meet his eyes, I could tell that much. The sex that we were both craving recklessly weeks ago has stopped altogether and I know he gets it because he hasn't called once. Cian doesn't even realize that I suspect a thing. I've been searching through his things and what I've found is so disturbing it has been keeping me up for days afterward. I can hardly breathe around him and not at all easily. Like the other night for instance; he's got his face planted between my thighs and though it feels good, his tongue feels no different wet, soft, and yet hard. His mouth is very warm and he knows what he's doing but the magic or whatever was holding me spellbound is gone. I can't help thoughts that seep into my mind like maybe he knows about Aidan and I and he's just fucking with me until he decides to have me offed. Me, I've been opening my legs, and everything else I have to lose, to a man who drops bodies in the river for a living. And not only to him, I live with the guy who orders him to do the deeds. Yeah. Holy shit doesn't quite cut it. Neither does asking myself what the fuck have I been doing. I don't even come I just pretend to and know without a doubt that my brain has been disconnected from my pussy. ******* Cian takes me out all of the time now to dinner, the theatre, museums, wherever I want to go. It reminds me of how things were in the beginning when I first fell in love with him. Back then I thought nothing much of his bad-ass persona or his reluctance and sometimes downright refusal to do the things I wanted because it made him sexy in my eyes. He only ended up giving me what I wanted anyway. Sexy I had thought. He's in love with me, he wants me. Yeah! Can you say N.A.I.V.E? Now I look at him and into his crystal green orbs and all I feel is danger, all the time, unleashed power. And yep I've been screwing his best friend and number one, go to guy. Nothing to worry about there. It never occurred to me to wonder why Aidan is wound up so tight all of the time. I assumed I knew but then I had been wrong. That fire in his eyes that makes them so beautiful is from his getting off on doing a job well done. Every time he puts in work and he's around me I know it. His eyes are lit up like the night sky on July 4th. How could I not notice Niall and his forever taped up knuckles, he enjoys his job too. ******* If those revelations weren't bad enough I saw Victoria. She's absolutely beautiful, stunning really with long thick waves of crimson colored hair that hang past her shoulders, eyes some form of mystical green. Cian had gotten up one night to leave after he'd received a text, as usual and I scared shitless, had still followed him. He'd gone uptown to into an apartment building. We live nicely but this place was spectacular. From across the street I watched as he'd nodded to the doorman and then gone in as if he'd done it a hundred times before. When he went in he'd worn jeans, a t-shirt, and some Nike's. When he came out he was in a tux that even from as far away as I was looked like it had been personally tailored by Brooks Brothers for him. He was devastatingly handsome. As I watched him get into the back of a chauffeured car I realized that I didn't know who the fuck Cian was. With my head spinning I wondered if I had been such a little girl that any tiny crumb he threw at me I accepted? Had to be right. He was dropped off at a small restaurant that looked very exclusive where again he seemed very familiar with whomever it was that held the door for him as he stopped to speak for a second before disappearing inside. From my sneaking position on the other side of the building I could see the back of his head as he sat next to a man who I easily recognized as his father. She looked like a woman who was used to the finer things in life with jewels draping her body and her perfect table manners. Even after all I had done flames of fury licked at me for a reason I wasn't altogether sure of. Hurrying back to our place I couldn't help but notice the difference in the scenery and architecture of Cian's two places. It's not that I had ever cared before but for some reason now it mattered. It really did. I tore up our place as neatly as I could while looking for something, anything. He hadn't even taken great pains to hide the keys I found. There were a few of them so I took them all. I did a lot of praying as I sailed back up town to the apartment building I'd seen him go into. I realized as I got past the doorman that I didn't have any idea where I was going and I couldn't just ride the elevator because surely I would get my ass caught. And as it had never occurred to me to do something like this I was definitely nervous and shaky enough to get busted. As I ascended in the elevator a male got on at some point. He looked like he was coming in from dinner or a business meeting or something. He smiled briefly and I noticed the set of keys in his hand. One of them looked like a key that I'd picked up from Cian's closet. I took them out to get a better look and the guy glanced over at me a second time, down at the keys in my hand his smile turned into a flat out wolf-like grin as he reassessed me with his eyes. You're on the wrong elevator he said like we were sharing a secret. This little baby he touched a smaller key on the chain goes to the elevator in the back and only goes to one floor. He acted happy as hell to show me the way and I remained quiet not knowing what to say. "Here we are" he said as I got off and then he handed me a business card giving me another once over again like I was an item in a store that he was interested in purchasing. Still stuck on stupid I guess I took the card and shoved it into my pocket as the elevator doors closed and I was left alone. I would throw the thing away later as I had no intention of calling the slimy bastard what so ever. I used the key on the elevator like he'd showed me. I only hoped no staff would be in the place. The doors opened and I walked into the place and promptly fell on my ass in shock. As I looked around I wanted to hurt someone or something and badly. The place smelled like Cian that intoxicating smell that made me want him the moment he came within touching distance, tonight though it was too cloying. When I could get up I went through every room and through all of his stuff. His bedroom was gasp worthy the bed sat on a three tiered circular platform off of the floor. His walk in closet held nothing but slacks, suits, dress shirts, ties, matching shoes no jeans, no fucking sneakers. His bathroom was amazing, and how many where there outside his bedroom, other bedrooms too. The kitchen was like something out of a magazine. I was almost done with my whatever-the-hell, search when I realized what I had been looking for was not there. His girlfriend obviously didn't live with him here. The last room I came to was locked. I went through each and every key until I found the one that fit. It opened to an office, a very nice office. I really should have been over that by now but it was yeah, nice. Papers in folders on the desk told me that Cian was here a lot, it also told me that Cian had at least three businesses that he owned. Two of them had seven digit entries. On the corner of the desk next to a computer was a picture of me taken right after my law school graduation. I wanted to scream. Instead I locked the door back wiped off my finger prints like I was a criminal and let myself out of the place. I did this without burning it the fuck down, without smashing the floor length windows. Yea me. I was in another kind of stupor as I headed home. I couldn't think or even take in enough air to breathe. Looking around at this fucking lie that was my life I packed my clothes leaving everything I couldn't carry behind. I had no idea where I would go but thank god I had a job and therefore some money in the bank I could go to a hotel, to think. I grabbed a taxicab and had him take me as far as I could get from our place. I called into work and holed up in my hotel room thinking way too much. What had I been to Cian this entire time? Just some pussy I thought laughing as tears ran down my face. I knew I must have been as I thought back on how many women I had allowed him to have plus me. FUCK! Regret was bitch slapping the hell out of me. I had been all kinds of fool and beyond. ********** When Cian got home it was almost two a.m. tired, he just wanted to curl up next to Keya and get some sleep. She was not in their bedroom. He turned on the light and noticed the note in the middle of the bed. Cian, it's over. Things have been waning for a while now and I don't want to do this anymore. Please don't look for me. I just don't love you anymore, Keya. More than a little drunk with a looming headache he didn't need this shit tonight. He fucking didn't. ********** Aidan had gone from babysitting Keya to babysitting Victoria. Cian had started blowing Victoria off right after he and Keya were almost caught at his place almost two months ago. Victoria had been giving him the looks for a while and she was very beautiful and Aidan wasn't particularly strong in that way. Not to mention that he was hurting from Keya's rejection. A lot. He sat on Victoria's couch watching her watch him out of the corner of his eye. When their eyes connected for the umpteenth time she walked over and stood in front of him. "Were not in love" she told him. "He doesn't love me and I don't' love him." "So whats the problem?" Right Aidan thought as he picked her up and walked her towards the wall. Holding her in place he ripped her panties off and then shoved himself into her hot, tight hole. He fucked her hard against the wall and it was good but as she ran her fingers through his hair in a particular way he found himself wanting to remove those fingers. They reminded him too much of the woman he was in love with. He began to pump harder into her making it hard for her to catch her breath. Her nails dug into his shoulders and that he could deal with. He fucked her at that pace until they both came hard calling out at almost the same time. If her facial expression was anything to go by afterwards then they both felt as empty as shit. Knowledge flickered between them and they shared a tiny smile. That is what saved what they had just done from being a disaster. It gave them what they needed to do it again... and again... and again. ************* When Aidan woke up he didn't know the name of the woman in his bed. He got the call from Cian, he'd woke her up and then dropped her off then jetted over to the one place in the world that he wished he never had to go again. Less than thirty minutes later he, Niall, Malachi, and Dillon were sitting around the living room. He needed a drink so he got one as they waited for Cian to say something else besides that he wanted Keya found. Aidan tried to fight the words that came out of his mouth but they came anyway. "Maybe—he cleared his throat, maybe you should just let her go." Aidan fixed his eyes on Cian's down bent head. "Excuse me."Cian's head came up and he eyed his friend. "What the fuck did you just say to me?" Aidan being Aidan stood his ground. Taking a sip of his nerve calming alcohol he tried again. "You're marrying Victoria, you know, this just seems like the best thing." It had gotten quieter than quiet in the living room. No one moved they barely breathed. Then— "You know what?" Cian growled glaring at Aidan. "You're exactly fucking right. I should just let her go. I really should." Cian stood up. "But I'm Not. Going. To." "Get off your fucking asses and find her he shouted at all of them. ************ Three days Cian had been in his apartment unable to do anything but sit around and wait. He'd gone from wanting to tell her everything, beg for her forgiveness to throwing all of her shit out into the street to making her a prisoner when he got her back. He had no idea where the fuck she could have gone. Then as he lay on his bed it hit him and he laughed out loud. He scooped up his cell phone and dialed a familiar set of numbers. It was answered on the second ring. "Hey" Cian said. "I need a favor." And that was that he felt tons better when he hit end knowing that he didn't need to continue to look for her. In a few days or maybe sooner she'd get herself home. He got up showered, grabbed a bite to eat and then called his boys to tell them what was up. ********** As Aidan ended the call he didn't know whether to be relieved or panicked that Cian had called off the search for Keya. *********** This cannot be right I thought as panic seized me. The white ATM slip with my name on it read insufficient funds for a two hundred dollar withdrawal. I got to the bank as fast as I could and what a surprise they told me all they could tell me was that my funds were frozen. This came from first the teller and then his manager as they both looked down their noses at me like I had been up to something illegal. I didn't even have enough money on me for a cup of Starbucks. SHIT! As I walked out of the bank it hit me and I started to laugh like a crazy person, I'm sure. But then I thought I was crazy for having the thought. Only one way to find out. He answered on the third ring. "Cian." "Oh hey Keya" he said sounding too pleasant. I knew I was going to have a hard time keeping the anger I felt out of my voice. "What's up?" he said as if he didn't have a care in the world. Impossible! "You motherfucker" I shouted at him. "How could you do this Cian?, How could you?" "The same way you just up and left me without so much as a goodbye" he responded. The bitch went unsaid but hung in the air just the same. "I need access to my money" I found myself begging. "Yeah well I need you home" he snapped at me. "Home, Cian! Home?" My brain was on serious overload. I was feeling like I had bumped it on something because what I said next was just suicidal. " Home, that little apartment we live in-- (which was not little by the way) or the penthouse where you keep the red head. Is that where I should meet you?" I snarled. Dead silence. Then more of the same. I had every regretful thought I knew how to have in the time it took him to speak again. His voice sounded more than a little strangled. "How long have you known?" "I want my money" Cian I said in a calmer voice. Not that it mattered that this had been all I'd meant to say in the first place. "How.Long.Have. You. Known?" I could feel the heat coming off his tone through the phone. "And what else do you know?" "I—nothing—not much—nothing." "Well at least I know why you left" he said laughing harshly. "Where are you?" "Cian-- "If I hang up on you—let's just say you don't want that, his tone was tight and frightened me. I tried again "Cian— "Tell me" he bellowed. I gave him my location. "Aidan will be there soon. Do not leave." The car was midnight blue in color as it pulled up to the curb. Dillon was driving. Aidan got out and opened the back door for me to get in. Strangely the thing that stood out the most was the large bruise on the side of Aidan's throat. I wondered who he had been fucking, as if I didn't have enough on my mind already. The ride wherever we were going was the longest of my life with no one saying a thing. Aidan had answered his ringing phone and was instructed to take me to get my stuff from the hotel possibly so that there wouldn't be any evidence after they dropped me in the river. I started thinking about how I had no family to speak of. My job was a fucking bore. I hadn't gone into criminal law or even family law. No I was the person you called when you needed a binding contract between business partners or a will in case of death. And who the fuck was going to miss me? I knew I should be worried because they all kept sneaking looks at me. I wasn't going to jump from a moving car or something. After we got my things I was taken to the penthouse. Surprise! Surprise! Dillon and Malachi flanked me on either side as we took the back elevator up with Aidan trailing behind us carrying my stuff. Cian stood in the door looking every bit the hardcore "businessman" I now knew him to be. No jeans, or t-shirts today. His green eyes, hard in his face, just looked at me like I smelled bad or something. "Stop fucking looking at me like that" I snapped at him finally realizing that I wasn't the piece of shit here and if he was going to kill me then I wasn't going to bitch up, been there done that. His hands came around my throat almost instantly and I was shoved up against the wall. In that voice he'd used on the phone to get me to comply he said, "you do not speak to me like that unless you want me to cut your fucking tongue out". I blinked hard several times, he didn't just seem different he was different but then I remembered so was I. "Get your fucking hands off me. I need a shower." I met his cold stare with one of my own. Shockingly he did move his hands. I walked around him and then turned back to face him. Any anguish I'd felt had been consumed by anger as I said to him that I couldn't even buy a cup of coffee. As he just stood there I don't' know mesmerized I said, "I want one now." I was definitely in Oz because none of what I imagined would happen did as he just shrugged, still looking at me and turned to Niall. "And Aidan" I said while I was at it. He looked up at me and for a moment a lick of fear touched his eyes. No one knew the outcome of this situation less than me. "I want one of those turkey sandwiches from the deli" I told him still sounding nasty even to my own ears. He nodded once. I walked towards the back where the master bedroom was. Cian followed me asking where I was going. "To shower. I just said that" I didn't bother to stop walking. Fishing he asked me why I was going the way I was. I did turn around to face him then and said, "Because that's where the master bathroom is." The sight of all the jaws dropping would have been funny if the situation hadn't been what it was. I walked past his bed and went into the bathroom grabbing a towel and some soap and then stepping into the shower. As the water rained down on me I sagged against the wall heavily. My entire body shook as the release of tension that had gotten me safely to the shower washed through me. I was scared but determined not to let him see it ever again, however long ever lasted for me. I wasn't a fool, at least not any longer Cian was more than capable of murder and I had pissed him off in an unacceptable way. As the water beat down on me I wondered what the hell I was going to do. When I finally left the shower there was a sandwich and coffee waiting for me on a stand near the bed. I wondered if I should eat it, if it were poisoned. I took a bite of the sandwich eyeing Cian who stood like a statue inside the room. I took a sip of the coffee, it was still hot. He watched me eat silently and when I was done he told me to lie back. In More Ways Than One Ch. 04 "Wh-what?" "I'm not going to repeat myself." "Well you're just going to have to because I didn't hear you" I snapped. I stilled myself as he came over and almost threw me back onto the bed while taking my towel away. "Don't even think about moving off that bed" he said as I moved to do just that and he unbuckled his belt taking his shirt out of his slacks. After he'd taken off his shirt he kneeled on the top step and pulled me close to the edge. "You've been gone for four fucking days" he said. "Four". And then his hot hungry mouth began to devour my pussy. "Oh my god Cian" I breathed grabbing at his hair as he licked at my sex. I exploded on his tongue and though I needed him to stop he wouldn't. He didn't. When I tried to move away his hold on my thighs tightened and just as I thought I might die from the intensity. I broke again falling to pieces against his lips. "FUUUCCKKKKK!" I screamed. When he finally let me go I was feeling more than a little dazed. He stood over me and the promise in his eyes was that he was going to hurt me and enjoy doing it. "So you no longer love me?" he glared down at me asking. "That's good because I don't love you anymore either and with that he moved on top of me. "You never did" I spit out against my own better judgment which I think had taken a leave of absence by now and was obviously not coming back anytime soon. He stilled when he heard that, his eyes finding mine again. He looked like he was struggling to not strangle me. A nasty little smile came onto his face. The head of his dick now bypassed the entrance to my pussy. "Cian Don't" I shrieked as I understood just what he was about to do. "Cian— "Cian donnn't" I yelled to this big and powerful male who I couldn't get to budge to save my life. "I'll hate you forever" I yelled meaning it. "Hate me then" he said hotly as he pushed forward. As I felt him penetrating me I moved in earnest to get out of his grasp. "It won't fit" I screamed just as he proved me wrong by sliding the last few inches of his thick cock into my ass. It hurt and part of me felt like crying. I lay still while he moved in and almost out until I couldn't anymore. It felt—good. I couldn't fight the shudders that snaked their way through my body or the moans that had been overwhelming my brain. I found I wanted it just as hard as he was giving it to me. I don't know who came harder or was the loudest when we came all I know is that as I began to push back on his dick as he filled me up his whole demeanor changed. He wasn't just fucking me, though he was in my ass, we were making love. Every inch of our skin touched, my arms wrapped around his back and my nails tore across the sweat slick skin there. "Hey Cian" I said just to blow his mind further as he stretched out next to me on the bed. "I like it rough." He was looking at me like he had no idea who I was much the same as he had the very first time we'd made love. As I went off to the bathroom I fully understood what being powerful felt like. I could feel it course through my veins like never before, like I was sitting on a throne and nobody was taking it away from me. Not Cian, his father, the redhead or Aidan. I'd been on the other side and it had done nothing for me. As I came back from cleaning myself and did the same to him he hardened again. I got on top of him and slid him into my hot, wet pussy. I watched him through sex-heavy lids and I knew without a doubt that he was enthralled by me. I'd seen the look on his face before but had no idea what it had meant. I did now. The word "mine" resounded loudly inside my head. I fucked him in many different ways for the rest of the day and through the night. We only took breaks to eat and drink. He belonged to me and I now knew it, nothing else mattered.