9 comments/ 25669 views/ 15 favorites Skid Mark Hunter By: Clare_Ca_2 Chapter 1. (Beep, beep)! "Hey you! Yeah, it's me – Jessie, 'Just caught sight of ya, coming around the corner there. What you got in the case, honey? A vi-o-lin! Hell, I thought it might ta bin a carbine. You know like in the old gangster movies - guffaw, guffaw, and guffaw. You think that's funny huh?" (Chuckle). "C'mon hop in; I give you a lift home in me Jessie taxi. I bin haulin' a load of manure t'day, so don't you mind the whiff. Manure grows them cabbages and carrots an' all. So don't ya' turn that pretty little-learned nose up at manure young-missy. Manure make the world go round see." "Talkin' 'bout young, young missy: How old are youz anyways, these days? Eighteen eh? Oh! Excuse me-ee, eighteen an' a half – I see, I see: Well-ll, I stand corrected, I sure do." (Guffaw). "My how time flies, it sure does. Why, I remember a time where you were barely knee-high to a load of steamin' shit that jus' dropped outta a pony's ass – if ya' s'cuz the expression, honey, 'cuz Ole' Unkle Jessie ain't got no formal ed-Ju-mactioning such as you'z have, honey. No siree-pop, ole' Jess is as thick as mud in a pig pen come a late winter's storm, an' a smidgen short on expression, if ya' know what I mean sweetie. Why ole' Jessie would cut off his own balls if he thought fir one second, that he had offended his sweet girlfriend's lovely little daughter. But, there it is; Uncle Jessie was blessed an' cursed, mind you, wid diarrhea - diarrhea of the mouth that is. Why, whatever pops into Uncle Jessie's head, comes straight outta his mouth. See this broken nose here honey, an' all these here missin' teeth –- Diarrhea. See this here scar on Uncle Jessie's belly: Knife –- diarrhea. Feel them there ribs missie. Feel them all broken up an' cracked –- Diarrhea. Uncle Jessie has a talent, of sayin' his mind, an' the big boys – the one's wid the knives an' big boots don't wanna hear it, honey; lest they wanna even the score sort of like." "So, missie, if Uncle Jessie says anythang that yo' don't like jus' kick him in the balls, honey – O.K? Uncle Jess has been kicked in the jewels a number of times, an' aside from havin' to cut out beatin' his meat, or playin' slap-an'-tickle widz the' gals fir a few weeks, then he be none is the worse fir wear, in the long run, sez' me. Do yo' agree missie? Good. Why yo' rubbin' yo' hands like that sweetheart? Jessie's sorry, but the heater broke down a few years back, an' ole' Jessie fell on some hard times there honey, but come summer, he'll have saved up enough to git her fixed. Jus' shove yo' hand into ole' Jessies trouser pocket baby. Yes, deeper honey. Yes – jus' like that. Those oysters are a'roastin' honey. Watch yo' don't burn yo' fingers down there now." (Yuk, yuk – yuk). "Did yo' notice hon that Uncle Jess has a hole in the bottom of his pocket there? Ole Jessie needs new britches, honey, an' he aims to git them too, after he gits the ole heater fixed there. Yes, that's right baby, Jus' hold them in yo' little hand like that, as if yo' were holdin' a puddle o' mercury, or a finch egg – gently, honey – be gentle. Yo' mom likes to keep her hands warm down there too sweatie. Don't worry hon, Uncle Jess washed them eggs good an' proper not more than a week an' a half ago, so they be as good as gold. It's Jessie's hole that yo' wanna stay away from luv. It's a few inches lower down. Yo' mom scratches it fir Uncle Jess. Ya' know, with that one long finger nail that she keeps just fir the job alone. OooW! Yes, baby, jus' like that. Yo' be a very good girl. Yo' mamma ever telt yo' that, honey? Ummm! Oh honey, yo' be a very good girl. Let Uncle Jessie stick his leg up here on the dashboard like this. Uncle Jess can drive with one foot, when being scratched. Ooow! Hon. Yes." "Okay. Yo I think yo' hands are warm now? Let Yo' Uncle take that leg donw then honey, an' don't bite yo' nails hon, not until yo' scrum the mud from under yo' pinkie-nail. Uncle Jess doesn't want yo' to come down wid summtin' that an asprin can't cure; yo' know what I mean hon?" "Yo' hands nice an' warm now chickadee? Good. It's called radiatin' the heat baby or conducting or sumtin' smart like that, but all Jessie knows, is he's sweatin' right now honey – sweatin! An' he thinks his ass-hole is bleedin', but he likes it." "Hey, ya wanna kick ole' Uncle Jessie in the balls now missie? 'cuz here they are, right here. Right in the middle o' me. They were right there in yo' hand a few minutes ago young missie - right there in yo' precious little hand. Ole Jess shaved them jus' last night. It be the best way to keep them mites down, ya' know. Deer have a lot of wheebles livin' around their ass, honey, an' when yo' mamma bleeds once a month, well ole Jessie has to have a release. A good dear, is as good as a good woman, to an ole farmer like Jessie – except fir them darm wheebles, that is. Yo' want the radio on honey? I'z only gots A.M., but here turn it on, sweetie. One speaker is still working hon. Turn it up Hey! Let's partie, right? Yo' don't like country an' Western? Okay, sweetie, I'll turn it off then – but yo' don't know what yo' missin' missie, an' Uncle Jessie knows his music, and can shake a leg or two on the dance floor evey now an' again – especially if he is wearing his tight jockey shorts, otherwise, its just too painful to let Ole Jessie's oysters swing wild in public ." "Jessie's nuts are full right now, but he won't pull them out, cuz' they git cold very fast in winter, an' 'cuz ole' Jess is drivin' too, honey. I'z got me handsful right now sweet-pea, an' believe me, I'z need both hands to git them two buggers outta me pants when they be full, like this." "Have you ever had Rocky Mountain oysters, Hon? No. They're yummy, honey." "My word, Uncle Jessie is mighty hungry all of a sudden baby: Why, a'shovellin' shit all day long will give a fasting Trappist monk an appetite to kill fir, honey. Yo' ever shoveled shit, sweetie? Why, anytime you want to come wid yo' ole Uncle Jess, he'll have a spare shovel fir yo' – no dought about it, hon. Yo' names already on it – I swear." "Shucks, it seems like it were only yesterday to an ole geezer like me, that I'd be a'chasin' a piece o' tail down the road, like yo', honey – an' chase it straight into the very gates of Hell, fir sure. But, when I saw you walking – walking home from college there right? Right, well I thought umm, ummm jus' look at them there apples a'bobbin' an' a'jigglin' on that young sappling of s tree of womanhood right there, an' from the back, I thought two schoolboys were fighting in a sleeping bag as you walked on by jus' then, honey." (Guffaw, guffaw). "I'm sorry honey, I didn't mean to hurt you none, I jus' meant that you look real good to a man right now, an' that you might not know it, so yo' better be careful out there wid them apples and boy scouts an' all, ya' hear me now honey? That's better. I like it when you smile like that." "Whoo boy! ...You have a woo-n-derful smile: Beautiful teeth - man-teaser lips. I bet all the boys want to kiss them lips – I would – I mean, if I was younger an' all." (Blush). "Oh! Thank you, Missy: A kiss on the cheek is as good as anywhere else, an' better than cash, it's said. Come here though an' give Uncle Jessie a little peck on the lips. Whoo! That was nice, I can tell ya': Very nice indeed. Thank yee missie. Uncle Jessie will remember that one 'til his dying day. Why shucks, c'mon honey, jus' one more fir the road, an' Uncle Jessie will be a happy camper tonight. Hot Dog! Ya' have a long tongue fir such a little gal. Ya bin chewing them there licorice sticks have ya' missy, an' munchin' on cashews I guess? Yep, I'z got one o' them there nuts out of that cavity in yo' back molar, fir sure, on that last Frenchie. They be good!" "Is that what the boys teach you at school these days behind the gym, honey?" (Snigger, snigger). "No? You mean you practice with your friend. What friend, if I might ask, yee missy? What's that yo' said ag'in honey. Debbie? Debbie's a girl's name though hun, now who is gonna' give their son a girl's name? It be cruel, me thinks, t' send a boy to school out there wid a girl's name on him - jus' cruel I say. What yo' say sweetie? That's your friend? Yo' mean, t' tell Uncle Jessie that Debbie is a girl? But what about the Frenchies, an' all the practicing that yo' told ole' Jessie about, jus' now? Yo' mean Debbie is the one you practice widj? Gawd darn it! Uncle Jessie nearly ran off the road there for a while sweetie. Ya' mean to tell me you and Debbie... Oh, never mind, Uncle Jessie is behind the times these days. I guess there's no harm in it, but... I'd sure like to watch sometimes – hey, whatcha say there sweetness – can ole Uncle Jessie watch jus one time, Uh, Uh...what yo' say honey? Uncle Jessie will show yo' gals how the custard comes out of his pole if yo' let him watch sometime. Ole Jessie has a lot of custard in his oysters right now honey, as bin as he hasn't seen yo' mom fir over a week now. O.k. Thank ye little missie, jus' let ole Jessie know when yo' an' yo' friend Debbie are going to do some practicin' honey, an' uncle Jessie will be there with his custard pole like a shot outt'a a gun hon." "Ya' know me an' yo' mother...I mean yo' mother an' me, well, yo' mother stays over at my place sometime out of a week, and... Oh. You knew that. Well, that's good; an' then I don't have to say no more on that. I like yo' mom..." "Really - she said that? Well, she never told me, that she might even love me. Hot diggity Dog! Missy, don't tell yo' mom that yo' told me that, Oka-ay. Deal Ok – deal: Cross my... C'mon say it wid ole Uncle Jess; Cross my heart and hope to die...ok, ok it's a deal then. I don't want any...complications you see, honey. Uncle Jessie just wants a quiet life, and to get his hole, now an' agi'n, you see what I mean? What yo mean missy, 'get my hole'? How old are you agi'n, honey, anyhow? Yeah, yeah, eighteen an' a half, yeah you did telt me that missie, but Uncle Jessie is gittin' a little long in the tooth honey, an; I firgot yo' see. Anyways what I meant to say was that Uncle Jessie likes to get his – whole lot of loving – from yo mamma, yeah, that's what I meant to say – yesh siree Bob, Yeah, that's what ole Uncle Jessie wanted to say alright, Yeh. Why you a'laughin' at poor ole' Uncle Jessie, when he telt you the truth, honey? It alright, Uncle Jessie don't mind little missie laughing at him. Ole' Jess is happy to see yo' smilin'. C'mon, slide them pumpkins over next to yo' Uncle Jess, an' give him a great big long Frenchie like I knows yo' can. Ummm, Honey, That be go-od fir an ole man like me. Ole' Jessies hands are a little cold honey, Mind if he puts this one between yo' thighs to warm it up a little? Umm, yo' be hot up there young missie – very hot. Jiminy Cricket! Why, yo' a regular hot potato now ain't yo' - you sweet little thang yo'! Oops! Almost ran over Farmer Brown's doggie there missie. Ummm. I got another nut, honey. Yo' really need to git on down to Dan the dentist sweetie an' git that there hole in the back o' yo' head filt, hon. Uncle Jessie thinks there be one more nut down in there. Let Uncle Jess pull over here fir a while, an' he'll git it out fir yo' wid the tip of his tongue. O.k. sweetie, open wide, 'cuz Uncle Jess the dentist is a' comin' in." (Gaffaw, gaffaw – gaffaw). "Ummm, crunchy. Chapter 2. "Ya' know, I always wanted to be a student when I wuz young, but my reading got in the way. I like books wid pictures yo' see, baby. I found a Playboy magazine in a dumpster one time when I was prospecting' fir cans an' bottles; yo' mom stayed over at my place four nights that week. She seemed really happy then, but them there books get old pretty quickly, especially when most o' them pages get stuck together an' all... So tell me honey, how's life as a student down at our pride-an'-joy college there? I do the gardens you know. That's where I met your mother." "Aye, I was shovelin' like fury. It was hot that summer an' I had me shirt off. Well, the cuttings flew everywhere, an' also stuck to me sweaty body like feathers to a tarring brush. It was then when yo' mom passed by, and called me "Big Foot", an' ran off a'laughin' like a Turkey the day before Thanksgivin'." "I couldn't work it out, until I passed by a window on me way back from the gardening. I remember laughing so loud, that an unkindness of raven was spooked in nearby trees of yonder, and took to the wing like a black-feathered blanket was thrown over the sun itself." "That month, I bagged a couple of rabbits, an' a fowl from the gardens. I had to hide them, for poachin' can cost me me job aroun' 'er. Don't tell anyone missy, or Uncle Jessie will never git off the dole fir that 'un." "...Are yo' comfortable pet? It's the safety belt, let me put it straight fir yo'. It is best if it goes between yo' apples, like this. My gawd you have very firm apples! ...I'm sorry, I was just..." "Jiminy Cricket! Look out! Where the frig did she come from! The last thing I want to do is run a down a nun pushing a wheelchair over on a zebra crossing. it's Life for that one, I guess, an' yo' chances of going ta' Heaven would be pretty slim, I'm reckoning. Geez!" "Jeepers, I'm a'sweatin' like a pig on a spit there hon. Driving 's a demanding task you know. Aw! The jolt must have popped one o' yo' apples out o' yo' T-shirt honey, let Ole Uncle Jessie help yo' put it back in there. What yo' mean honey? What lump in my trousers? Oh, that! Never yo' mind honey, the swellin' 'll go down in a while, especially if Uncle Jess 'll rub the end of it widj a handful of cracked ice an' shaving crème fir a while until it spits up into the air, like a lama in heat. No. Honey yo' can't come an' watch – not unless yo' bring yo' friend Debbie along, so's yo' ole Uncle Jess can watch yo'z two a'practicin' yo' Frenchies, that is. Oh. She's away visitin' her dad yo' say. Then sorry hon, but no deal then. It's only fair to ole Uncle Jess, to git somethin' in return fir beatin' his meat like that. I'z mean, if ole Jessie spills the beans t'day, yoz mightn't wanna trade t'morrow, havin' seen the show already. No, no,no. No deal. Please stop cryin' sweetie. Yo'll git to see Ole Jessie's cream flyin' out of his rod, jus' as soon as Uncle Jessie git's t' see them tongues a'waggling, between yo' an' yo' little pal. Is Debbie the one wid them big huge apples, hon? Ah, yes... Oh. my Gawd! Uncle Jessie almost creamed the inside o' his britches sweatie. Let's talk about the weather fir a few minutes, honey. Uncle Jessie's all in a huff over here sweetie. Yes, I knows sweetie, the lump in Ole Jessie's pants has gotton bigger. Don't rub it like that babe, Ole Jess can only take so much before the custard starts to fly, sweet pea, an' Uncle Jessie's gun is a'loaded, wid both barrels ready to fire, wid the safety off. So, don't rub ole Jess there, or there will be an almighty mess in Jessie's pants fir him to clean up shortly. Yes, honey, I know the lump is even bigger now, and yes, sweetie, it hurts. Gawd knows it hurts." Chapter 3. "How yo' doing luv...? As I was saying: What was I saying? Oh, yeah. Me an' you mom got together one night an' we got into the rabbit stew, an' Haha, so as to speak," (Heehaw, heehaw), "got underway. Yo mom an' me had a good ole fashion party that night. Boy, it went on 'til farmer Browns cock crowed us into a brand new day, an' we laughed so hard that the cock stopped crowing, I swear!" "Well, we had it off for a long time. Jus' me, her and the rabbits an' carrots an' all – wid a bit of fowl play chucked in for good measure, I guess." (Hee hee). " Your mother had a pair o' good legs on her then as I recall, an', most importantly, she was clean. Why she would wrap them gams aroun' ole Jessie's neck an' pull him in fir a good fish supper of a lickin'. Mind yo', Ole Jess never saw anything in that woman's knickers that he wouldn't feed to his best friend – I swear!" "So, you got a boyfriend, honey? No! A lovely little thang like yo'! I'm sad. Oh! Yo' just broke up yo' say. Now that's even sadder missy. Aww, come here sweet heart, don't yo' cry like that. Yo' tearin' the heart out o' ole Uncle Jess. Jus' lean your little head on Uncle Jessie's shoulder and give it all yo' got honey. No, no I don't have any Cleanex, but that's ok, jus' blow ya' nose on Uncle Jessie's sleeve there. I'll be doing a wash in a week or two, so that's alright." There, there now. Tell Uncle Jessie all about it. Did you - like - mess around, you an' yo' boyfriend, I mean? No? ...You know like down there an' all? Okay, once yo' say. Once is enough baby. Sometimes it be more than enough. Did you like it, hon? (Grinning). It ok; everyone like it sweetness. Everyone like it, even the pope Himself. He like it too baby. Yo' got hair down there, honey? Yeah, a lot yo' say. Like mother like daughter they say. Yo' mom even has hair around her bung hole. It bad fir lickin' wjat wid them darn dangleberries an' all, but Uncle Jess don't like to complain too much hon, or he would never get his hole that way. What yo' say? Yo' have a hairy bung hole too, an' lots o' dangleberries sweetie. Well, what can yo' do...? No, no, no! Don't shave yo' bung-hole, honey. The hairs will grow back thicker, an' longer than ever. In the end yo' will be spendin' twice as much time an' money at the hair salon baby. Jus' find a guy who can put up wid the berries, that's all, hon. Some guys like women's ass-fruit. Personally, I can do without it, but what the hey. It's getting' the hole that counts in the end sweetie – dangleberries or not." "Did he make you suck it, hon? ...and you made him lick you too right? Did you do it together, I mean, licking an' sucking at the same time? No...? What yo' mean missy. ...You don't know what I'm saying! missie, If I can ask you this without being...too bad, but are you a...a...a virgin? What do you mean missy? You mean you don't know what a virgin is? Then you're one honey – 100%. Here we are – Home. I'm happy for you, hon. Now Uncle Jessie has to go before he gits in a whole load o' trouble. Lift the door a bit honey, when yo' close it. Them there hinges are a rustin' out. Chapter 4. "Yo' okay now, hon. Ok, then. Telt yo' mom that Ole Uncle Jessie saw yo' home safe an' sound when she gits home from work today. It might git ole Jess some hole next week, wid a bit o' luck" (Heehaw, heehaw). Come around to the driver's side my little chicklet, an' give Ole Uncle Jess, a long wet Frenchie fir the road home. Ummm, Ole Jess like it when yo' push that thang down his throat. Ummm. Yo' sure yo' not part Cobra, hon, what wid a tongue that long, yo' could gobble rod, an' lick a man's brown eye all at once. One stop shoppin' if yo' ask me. Yo' got a talent young lady, an' a future, if yo' use that reach properly, yo' hear. Use that tongue to yo' advantage, baby, an' don't go a'wasting it on flappin' asn' naggin' yo' hear ole Jessie a'talkin' to yo' now. Jus' use that thang to lick balls an' guy's bung-holes, an' yo'll be okay, fir the rest o' yo' life honey. Ole Jessie can't understand why womankinds as whole haven't figured this out yet. I mean, they be suckin' cock fir thousands o' years now, an' the bitches still haven't gotten it right. Talk about a learnin' curve. These whores are flat-linin' it all the way to the divorce courts, with no knickers on, an' chipped toe-nail varnish. They're broke. They need the revenue. Listen to ole Uncle Jessie, hon. Jus' lick an' suck. Lick an' suck, an' the world is your's lick an open oyster, but don't firgit ta' swallow at the end too. That's very important honey. Just lick an' suck; lick and suck an' swallow, and coo too. Men like to hear the cooing, especially whilst the swallowin' is going on. Burrr! It's cold out there today. Just watch that step over there missy, it's a big 'un. Let ole Uncle Jess come out an' help yo' over it. When will the county ever fix this there hole in the ground? It ridiculous – I mean this be bigger than jus' a pot hole now, It more like a sink hole. Little missie could break a leg or sumtin'. Come on, let Uncle Jessie help yo' over that 'un, my little angel. Come on, up wid you, an' ole Uncle Jess will carry yo' over that open trench like a gentleman ought to. There yo' are. Safe an' sound. My gawd, missie, yo' be heavier than yo' mamma. I guess it's yo' ass. It be bigger than yo' mom's, an' it be hot to the touch, an' ole Jessie begs his little angel's forgiveness, when his hand went up her dress an' held her full, overflowin' buttocks jus' then. Jessies little angle was heavier than he expected, an' her panties were wetter than he expected." Skid Mark Hunter Jessie's finger steamed in the frigid air with groin balm on it, and as the plumes of vapor made their way into his flared nostrils, the lump in his trousers grew exponentially. "Oh! I see the chill in the air today, has turned yo' little "headlights" on, there, missy. Sorry, I couldn't help noticing. You take after yo' mom, why she has the longest, stiffest headlights that this ole' soldier has – ever – seen! Sorry honey, I jus' don't know when to shut up, do I." "Say what missy? Do I want a cup of warm coffee fir the road...? I...I...I, guess... Hey, is your mother home? When is she expected, honey? ...She's working late tonight then. Your dad passed away, right? You have no brothers or sisters then – yo' the only child...? ...What about yo' boyfriend? Ok, ok -ok I was jus' asking, take it easy Missy, take it Gawd darn easy, honey, Uncle Jessie forgot again. So yo haven't bin licked fir how long now missie? Three months uh?. That's a long, long time honey, especially being that you liked it so much an' all. Sheesh, life is just a bowl of cherries honey. Sometimes it's good, sometimes bad. Burr. That coffee sounds mighty good right now hon, let's git indoors, or you're going to blow a headlight, by the looks of things. Sorry, sorry." "Yo sure it ain't too much trouble, fir ya' sweetness, but I sure could do wid a warm cuppa to keep me rolling. O.K., I'll come in fir one cuppa. Only one mind yo', 'cuz two will keep me up fir the night. Ole'Uncle Jessie doesn't want to be up to the early hours of the morning, beating his meat trying to git to sleep. What yo' mean honey? Haven't yo' heard that expression before – beating meat? My yo' sure have led a sheltered life missie, but Uncle Jessie he like that. Let me park over her, under the bushes, an' out of sight; it'll keep the snow off me windscreen. Can yo' see me truck from up there missy? No! Then that's good. Now where's that warm cup o' Joe?" Chapter 5. "Snow's deep up here missy: Yes, tuck yo' arm under Uncle Jessie's, an' we'll get through together. ...So, can Uncle Jessie ask yo' a personal question? You don't have to answer, but - Well, here goes: Did yo' ever "do it" wid yo' boyfriend? You know – jig-a-jig? Never ay. I mean, did he ever get hard – I mean down there like? He did. How big was he, I mean when it was hard an' all? Three friggin' inches! ...whoo, whee! An' how thick? One Gawd darn inch! Gawd Dam, I gottsa go home honey. I'm sporting a full eleven and a half incher wid a three-inch girth. Where's me truck, baby you're not ready fir me yet. Go play wid yo' dolls, I'm outta here. What yo' mean missie. Yo', got somthin' that yo' want to show Uncle Jess. Oh? Ok, but I can't stay long, anyways yo' mom will be home in a bit, an' I don't want there to be any – awkward questions, an all see. Yo' see hon, right? Yo' see." Chapter 6. "Oow! It's nice to get that jacket off for a mo'. Two sugars please missy – no cream." "So, do you miss yo' boyfriend, sweet stuff? I know; it happens to everyone when the breakup comes. It'll pass honey, jus' hang in there ok. What do you miss the most missy? You can talk to me if you like. The licking? What you mean missy, when you say, "The licking?" Yo' say yo' miss the licking. Listen, I think I'z ought'a go now. Thanks, fir the coffee, an' tell yo' mom I will call here next week. No, no, I think I'z should be going, where's, where's me jacket. No, no. No more coffee honey. I know I haven't touched the first one yet, but Uncle Jessie needs to git outta' Dodge, whilst he still can yo' see honey. Where's th' door...?" "Yo' always bend over like that to untie yo' shoes missie? An' how long has the college allowed miniskirts as part of the school uniform, hon? Gawd darn, honey, yo' got a full hammock under there! If that there gusset was filled any fuller, you'd be chewing rag, honey. Perhaps Uncle Jess will stay for another cuppa. Yo' make good Joe, sweetie, real good." Chapter 7. "What do you mean? Oh, I was only kidding when I said eleven and a half inches. Jus' bragging ya' hear – Jus' lettin' on." (Hee hee). "Why you want to see, hon? Uncle Jess was just pulling yo' leg, sweetie. No, no, I have to go honey. I have to go now sweet thang. Anyway'z yo' mom could be home any minute now. Jus' call yo' boyfriend an' say sorry, an' he'll be back faster than a cornered rat up a drain pipe - tongue out at the ready, an' fit fir the lickin'. Trust yo' ole Uncle Jessie now. He knows about such thangs. Jus', jus' – jus' stick wid yo' boyfriend an' his stiff little three incher will do the job, in the end – I guess...? That way you'll never know what you're missing missie. Believe me, it's the best thing fir ya', sweet thang. Yo' must know, Uncle Jess only wants the best fir his little angel – right! There yo' go. Yo' such a good gal. Yo' mother would be proud of yo'." "Honey, can yo' please git outta me way, an' stop barring' the door, Please honey. Yo' gonna' git ole' Jess in a lot of hot water, if you carry on like this luv. Please let me out sweetness. Baby, you oughtn't to rub yo' Uncle like that, especially right there honey. Ouch! I'm getting large, an' it's pullin' me hairs out." Ok, you want to see a real cock! Here it is. Stop screaming missy, it's just a cock! Look, let me pull the hood back. See, it's the same as yo' boyfriend's, only four times the size. The red eye at the top of the purple helmet is where ole Jessie pisses from, see, and where the baby custard comes out from when he rubs it. Remember you can't get pregnant missie, by just swallowing the custard; it has to be unloaded into you. What do you mean where? I could tell you, missy -or I could jus' show you, but I'm leaving right now, baby girl, Ole' Jessie's gotta git outta here. Yo' mom still got that there gun of her's sweetheart? I thought as much. Let me go, missie, please. May I take this newspaper honey; I'll never be able to get this thing back into my pants when the flag has been hoisted up the flag pole this high. Uncle Jessie will jus' roll the newspaper around it until he gets home, an' rub's the custard out of it. You made it so hard sweetie that it hurts. Ole' Jessie's balls are filled to the brim honey, an' they are aching so bad right now that he can hardly walk. Uncle Jess has to go an' rub fir a while. Come here an' give yo' Uncle a kiss goodbye missie." Chapter 8. "Honey, please get up off of yo' knees, will ya'. Yo'll never git Jessie's knob through those beautiful lips, an' down that perfect long neck of yours like you can wid your boyfriends, ya' know. it's jus' too darn big fir ya honey, now take the tellin' from yo' Uncle, who knows better baby. It will never fit." "Don't honey. Don't pull Uncle Jessie's pants down around his ankles like that. What if yo' mom came through the door right now. Ole' Jessie would have a whole lot of explaining' to do, fir sure, an' a man can't run shackled at the ankle, like so. Well, the end is hot an' purple because poor Ole' Uncle Jessie's balls are full of baby mayonnaise, an' his pole will not go down until all the mayonnaise has squirted out of that little hole at the top of the red helmet, yo' see honey." "No, no - no! How did you manage to get yo' panties off missie? Ole' Jessie missed that one, and yo' can't hang them like that over Uncle Jessie's pole. Yes, they do look kinda' funny hanging there like that, don't they?" (Yuk, yuk – yuk). They're still warm sweetie, from being on yo' ass, an' all, an' they smell nice an' fresh, Ummm, especially on the inside. Jessie like!" "Have yo' gone poo poo today, honey? When? About an hour ago, yo' said. Was it a big poo honey? How big? Almost the length of yo' forearm, and how wide was it sweetie? Just make a circle wid yo' thumb and finger, hun, Ole Uncle Jessie'll get the drift of it. Yikes sweetie, yo' have to be careful wid poos that big. Yo' could split yo' "Kaysha" in two. What yo' mean, what's a Kaysha? Why it's that little bit of meat that separates yo' bung-hole, from yo' baby-hole, honey. An' it's there jus' in kasha guts fall out o' the bottom of yo' hon." (Ho, ho, ho. Sorry, jus' one o' Jessies little jokes there my little angel – but it does have an element of truth to it – don't yo' agree sweetie?"). I mean, they would if yo' asshole joined up wid yo' baby chute, sweetie. Geesh! Don't they teach yo' anything at school these days honey"? "How big was yo' poo ag'in sweetie? Next time yo' feel yo' gonna take a dump like that agin', jus' drop everything sweetness, an' come an' git Uncle, Jessie. I'z jus' gottsa watch that birth fir myself, Okay honey - O.K then: Promise? Good girl." "The only reason I ask, though, honey child, is that there is a humungous skid-mark running from way back in yo' panties, all the way from the rear, to the front. Then it joins up with a massive beige skid-mark from yo' little hairy muffin' I guess, which, in turn ends up at the terminus of where yo' sweet clitoris lives, in a bunch of yellow pee pee stains and a bunch o'black pubic hairs stuck to the gusset with what smells like some kind of fish glue – the larger skid sporting a pong of burnt muffings , stale coffee and a a McDonald's quarter pounder with cheese – hold the pickles." "Uncle Jessie thinks yo' must have been in a rush. What wid strugglin' to give birth to such an enormous Christmas chocolate log an' all, an' that it took longer than yo' expected, and in yo' haste, yo' firgot to wipe yo' ass! Is Uncle Jessie right on this account, or not, sweetie? Thought so." "Honey. Listen to yo' Uncle right now. No matter how late or rushed yo' are, yo' have to take the time to wipe yo' bung-hole – ya' hear me, sweet thang? An' here's a tip fir yo'. Always wipe yo' ass-hole from the front to the back sweetie, instead of the other way 'round. Yo' don't wanna git a clout full of mud, now do ya'? It spoils the taste fir yo' boyfriend sweetie, yo' hear yo' ole Uncle talkin' baby? Good. Now practice with yo' Uncle a few times so that I knows yo' gots the message. Yes, that's good. Front to back, front to back – one more time honey. Yes, that's right. Jus' like that – front to back. Okay, sweetie, that's enough fir now: Uncle jess thinks yo' gots it now. What time is it missie? Oh, my Gawd! Yo' mom could be home any minute now. Where's me pants? Give ole' Jessie his pants now honey, an' stop messin' around like this baby: It disrespectful, honey." Chapter 9. "Honey, who taught you to suck balls like that? I know married women of forty years who can't do it that good. Good honey, yo' doing real good now. Let Uncle Jessy kick off his boots, an' get his feet outta these pants ag'in, that way he can open his legs wide, so as you can get right in there and do whatever yo' want, see. Hell, I'z had these boots an' pants on an' off three times already, but Ole' Jessie can't seem to git to the door yet, what wid your lickin' an' suckin' an' fingerin' an' all, hon. Jessie like!" "Ahh, let me open my legs fir ya' honey. Ole' Jess likes to have his salad tossed. Oh. Yes honey, jus' like that. Yo' tongue must be all of five inches long baby, with a good four wriggling up Jessie's hole. Jessy likes honey. Jessy really likes!" "Yes, Baby lick Jessie's shaft, all the way from the bung-hole, around the balls an' up the pole to the eye of the helmet, Ummm. Yes, siree. Uncle Jess is one happy camper t'day baby." "What you mean honey? Oh, yes, the creamy sticky stuff oozing out of Jessie's cock and running down the back of his shaft, why that's jus' baby cream overflowing out of Uncle Jessie's ball sack, hon. Jus' lick it up and swallow it, sweetie, it's good fir ya' full of good protein, an' all. Why, a gal like you could live on cock custard if ya' got enough of it down yo' neck. That's it honey, suck the eye dry. It's only the pre-custard. The full load is waiting to be delivered soon. Feel Uncle Jessies balls hun. See how full they are. Well, all of that cream is fir Uncle Jessie's good little gal. Are you hungry sweetness, 'cuz there is a lot of blancmange getting' ready to be served up real hot, and sticky? Uncle Jess hopes you will like it, your mom does." "Yes, honey, that's good gal. Yes, open them jaws, wide sweetie. Wider – wider, just a little bit more honey, Ahhh! Good girl, finally, yo' got Jessie's bell end all the way into that tiny little mouth of yours. Uncle Jess is amazed, an' very very happy. Good girl. My Gawd! Yo' have sharp teeth. Careful, hon. Ole Uncle Jess could bleed-out if yo' cut his helmet when it is pressurized like it is now. Uncle Jessie only has eight pints of blood ya' know, and two pints of come in him, and by the time Ole Jessie unloaded his jizz, he would have lost so much of the red stuff, that he would be nothing more than a rag doll. But, first things first – the jizz has to be emptied before the ambulance arrives. Men are built to come, baby. It's all we live for, honey. If a man had a loaded gun to his head, and a sweet child sucking his cock an' balls, an' he be ready to come, then given the choice to not come, and live, or to come and die, every man on this revolving ball of shit would chose to die. It jus' the way it be baby, so be careful wid them teeth yo' hear. Be careful honey." Chapter 10. Good Gawd! Look at the time! Yo' mom is already on the way home from work. Sweetie, we will have to finish this off another day. Open yo' mouth wider honey, wider. Wider I said! Arrrgh. Ouch, Jeepers Uncle Jessie can't get the bell end out of yo' mouth honey, without those razor sharp teeth of yours ripping his helmet to shreds. Uncle Jessie has screwed up honey. The only way to git his rod outta yo' head is fir yo' to bring yo' poor ole Uncle, over the top so that he can empty his balls. That way, Uncle Jessies helmet will subside. Now baby, listen to yo' uncle. Ole' Jessie doesn't want any throwing up – especially when his bell end is down yo' neck. That ole tummy acid burns like the bejeebers. So, jus' relax, an' yo' favorite Uncle will talk yo' through it, Okay? Just nod sweetie, if yo' understand what I'm tellin' yo'. Yo' understand? Nod, like I told yo' to, honey. Have yo gone, deaf sweetie? I jus' told ya' to nod. Yes, just like that. That's a good girl. Okay, okay. Yo' can stop nodding now baby. Uncle Jessie got the message. Is yo' okay baby? Can yo' breathe? Good – good. Cripes! I'm going to git caught here. I can jus' feel it a'comin'. What's that? My Gawd! The phone. Who could be callin' now? Say what? Who is nummy? Oh, I firgot you have yo' mouthful. Yo' mean Mummy. Quick, git over here sweetie, an' answer it, an' try not to talk too much. Yo' understand? Nod, gawd darn it. Didn't I jus' telt yo' to knod if yo' understand. Then, nod fir Christ's sake – nod you little bitch! Answer it baby. Quick, answer it before it stops a'ringing. "Ewllo. Ohg, hi –g nummy ow arrg yew? Yew goggno be late. Okray. Shee yew ing alfr an hougr. What you meang? Ohg, no I'mn justh eatring an accle. No an acpple. Yesh. Byg." (Click). "Good girl! Uncle Jessie thinks we have a chance to git otta this mess baby, so just follow yo' Uncles directions an' everything will be alright. What did I telt yo' about noddin' baby? Then nod honey. You know, yo' gonna have a hard time at school, if yo' don't listen, hon. Nod!" "O.k. sweetie: Just move yo' head in and out, kind of like the way a chicken's head moves when it walks. Very good honey, Ummm. Yeah, jus' like that. Keep going baby. Yes-ss, deeper baby, oh yes honey deeper. Be careful wid them teeth sweetie, they are sharp, sharp – sharp! It's like getting' a blow job from a shark, honey. Good girl, yes, yep, keep goin' baby. Yo' doin' great." "Hand me them panties honey, let me git some pheromones on the scene here. Ummm, they smell like good fish, not like yo' mother's dead fish. Uncle Jessie likes baby. He likes baby a lot." "Honey, let Uncle Jess spin yo' around here. Watch them teeth now: Good girl. Are yo' okay being upside down like this sweetie? Don't worry Uncle Jessie has yo' held firmly around yo' little waist. Ole; Jess woun't let yo' fall baby. Jus' keep on doin' the chicken-head on yo' poor ole' Uncle's rod honey: Yes, jus' like that. Good girl, Ummm. Jessie likes." "Okay baby, Uncle Jessie won't let yo' fall, okay, so open yo' legs honey. That's right. Wider, wider; do the splits sweetie, like yo' do on the cheerleader team. Good honey, very good. Honey, look at all this juice, and foam. Yo' bin naughty haven't yo' Uncle Jess thinks yo' bin rubbing yo' little oyster down there under yo' skirt, when Jessie wasn't lookin' right. Good girl, jus' nod like that." "Uncle Jessie is going to lick you clean, baby, an' he thinks you are goin' to like it. Ummm, Very creamy: Wow! Baby, when was the last time yo' washed this thang? What yo' say? Three days ago. Oh. Honey, you are a very pungent gal, yo know – mamma! Yo' gottsa wash this little jewel daily honey - I mean every day!" "Yo' poo poo hole here is a bit of a disaster sweetie. Remember, always wipe from now on, and always from front to back. Yo' remember, right? Good girl. Jus' nod. Keep on doing the chicken-head angel. Yo' doin' great! Jessie's teeth are hanging out to dry up here – big time!" "Uncle Jess is goin' to lick yo' poo hole now sweetie, but cut down on the pickles at McDonalds in the future chickadee. They make yo' hole rotten, but Ole Jess is going to lick it good. Good enough until it is sparklingly clean, this time, because Ole' Jessie is jus' that kinda guy – an' he loves yo'. But, only this once okay? Well, here goes. Ummmm: Toasted bagels, with cream cheese, coffee – two sugars, and a jelly doughnut, and egg; sardines and a Mac meal, plus licorice with cashew nuts. Ummm, the stink of yo' ass tells the story of yo' diet honey, an' Ole Uncle Jessie thinks yo' been naughty. Drink more water, hon. Yo' ass will benefit by it." "Open yo' tight little poo poo hole honey, so Uncle Jess can get his tongue all the way down in there - Very good. Wow! Honey, yo' ass opens up wide! Have yo' bin shovin' thangs up there sweetie? What was that? Oh, yo' hair brush handle. Okay, whatever does it fir ya'. Uncle Jess is down tight wid that one, okay baby. Good." Chapter 11. "Honey, I think the custard is getting' ready to come out of Uncle Jessies balls now. So what I want yo' to do, and this will be a lot easier on clean up, is that, try bending yo' head backwards, and when Ole' Jessie's cock-knob is at the back of yo' throat, nestled in between yo' tonsils, take a deep breath, then try and open yo' throat, as wide as yo can, an' I will slide the red knob down yo' neck, as far as it will go. Jus' try it sweetie. It's not hard. Jus' give it a go fir Ole' Uncle Jessie's sake, that's all – jus' give it a chance to work fir ya'. What honey? You said yo' bin practicin' wid bananas: Good girl - Very good! This will be a big banana fir ya' but try it honey. This way I can empty my balls directly into yo' flat little tummy; Kind of like using an intra-oesophageal feeding tube: This way baby, there is no swallowing, no gagging, and no clean up afterwards, an' Uncle Jessie really likes it. So try it honey. Try it fir yo' bestest Uncle Jessie, now there's a good girl. Good yo' noddin', an' Jess is happy." Chapter 12. "Oh My God! God! Yes, yes, yes, yes-s. Oh MY God! You little darling! You did it! Now, baby, try an' git a little more down yo' neck the next time. Oh, good God, that is good, Oh! so, so,so, go-od baby. Now try more. I want yo' to shove every last inch down yo' throat: I want my overflowing balls dancing either side of yo' cute little nose, and I want yo' to know that each and every time they jerk up and down on yo' face, a huge wad of thick, hot creamy baby-come shoots out of the end of my throbbing cock, straight down into yo' greedy little womanly gut. C'mon., please do it for good Ole Uncle Jessie honey – please. Jus' try honey. Jus' try jus' one more time. Ummm! Yes-s, jus' like that." Skid Mark Hunter "Okay, are we ready? Good, now take a deep, deep breath. Good girl, now open yo' throat baby, for here comes the custard." Chapter 13. "Awww! Baby, that is so, so good! So very tight sweetie. Stop kickin' honey. Uncle Jessie loves you, and wouldn't do anythang to hurt yo' okay? Now relax yo' throat sweetie, uncle Jess already has the first six inches down yo' throat, now there's just another five and a half to go, so here it come honey. Oh, my God! Get it in there, all of it honey, jus' one more inch, Ahhh! It be so good honey; yo' be a very good girl today: Uncle Jessie will take yo' out fir ice-cream tomorrow, because yo' are so good." "Hold yo' head very still sweetie an' Ole' Jess won't be long: Feel Uncle Jessie's ass pumping his cock in and out of yo' tight little throat, like a steam-engine piston arm my lovely little doll." "Ok, ok! Let Uncles Jessie pull his cock out of yo' throat fir a minute honey, so yo' can catch a breath or two. Right. That's enough. Take a very deep breath now sweet honey, open up, Awww! That's it, all the way down in one go. Honey, Uncle Jessie loves yo'. No one has ever swallowed all of Jessies eleven and a half inches before sweetie. Missie is a good girl – a very good girl!" Chapter 14. "Jessie 's coming now, honey. Uncle Jess is gonna come straight into yo' tummy baby, so no spewing, okay? God baby. Good girl. Nod. Ok." "Oh! My frigging God! I'm fuckin' coming! Arrgh!, yes, yes...yummy yummy argh! Baby, Uncle Jessie can't stop coming. Feel ole' Jessies balls dancing up an' down on yo' face honey. Every time Jessie's balls bounce, another squirt of baby-custard fills yo' lovely little gut. My God! ...Thirteen, fourteen, argh...fifteen. Jeepers, Uncle Jess has never come fifteen times before. Uncle Jess is empty. Uncle Jessie is done!" "Let Ole' Jessie roll over here. That's right sweetie, breathe deeply – breathe. Look at Uncle Jessie's cock honey. It's like a wet noodle now. That's a good girl, suck on the end jus' like that. Sup-up the last few drops of Uncle Jessie's cock-cream. Ummm! Jessie likes it, honey. Ummmm! Jessie likes." Chapter 15. "What's that noise? It's the front gate. Jeepers it's yo' mom honey. She's home. Quick! Get up. Tidy yo' hair missie, give me my clothes, I'll be in the bathroom, lick the come off yo' chin sweetie. Please please try an' delay yo' mom, until Uncle Jessie gits his clothes on. I'll be in the bathroom here. Be good sweetie. Please, be good." Chapter 16. [Ruby (mother)]: "Hi. Honey. Oh! What a day. I haven't stopped since I left this morning. Come here love, and give your mom a kiss. Oww! You're sweating honey, and why is your hair all messed up like that sweetie? Are you feeling okay my little cherub? Don't worry mom will make a nice pot of steaming hot chicken soup for you later my little angel. It'll do you the wonders of good, my little darling. I love you, my child. I just love you. Come, give mother another kiss. Ummm, What's that taste on your lips, honey? Have you seen Uncle Jessie lately? Suddenly he came into my mind for some reason or another?" "What's that smell, honey?" "Have you been rubbing, my darling, again? You know what Sister Mary told you when she caught you rubbing in the school showers with Debbie – why the both of you could go blind if you don't quit doing that stuff. When was the last time you washed that little thing of yours honey pie? Three days ago! Oh! My God Sweetie, you have to wash your groove at least once a day honey, maybe twice a day now that you got all that hair down there, luv. I know it's cold, but just roll up a wet flannel, open your legs wide like this, and run that cloth back and forth between your lips, like there is no tomorrow, and use a large cloth, honey. I mean you might as well do your asshole while you're at it right? Now go to the bathroom, and give it a go, and I'll open up a window or two in here. Don't worry darling. Your mum threw out an old pair of knickers of her's once that were just too soiled to launder, and when she was coming home from work the next day, she saw half a dozen hooligans, and louts, fighting tooth and nail, along with a couple of ravenous dogs and a cat, all vying just get a sniff of the – caked gusset – of my prior discarded panties, and the flies that it drew was – well - something out of a Gandhi movie, itself. So go wash that thing baby, and wash it good and proper this time cherub – good and proper. You hear me my little angel – good and proper this time! Good." "Can you hear me my little angel?" "Okay, well of course I was appalled, and beat them off with a broom handle, yet somewhere, deep down inside me, I was rather flattered. Take it from your mommy sweetie. Wash your clout daily, or you won't have a minute to yourself, from these knicker-sniffing riff-raff. God! I have been so, so licked in my time, and I can't say that I didn't enjoy it, but now and again – just now and again, it's nice not to have a man's head up between your legs. I mean, holding farts in can become excruciatingly boring, in the end – you know? Everyone likes to play the methane-trombone – even if it is just now and then, out in the woods alone, and just for the squirrels and moles, and the mice and the bears, and the bees and birds, or just under water – scuba diving in the Caribbean. Fish have ears; it is said. And sharks can be very romantic, whilst being enthralled by a well tuned ass-brass serenade. Take it from mom baby-doll. It's better to swill the mackerel's mouth every now and again, instead of having to chase delinquents and mad dogs off with a stick in the snow." Chapter 17. "What do you mean honey, you can't? Why can't you? What do you mean there's someone in there? Who's in there? Let me see." "Jessie, what are you doing here, and why are you not wearing your trousers?" "You saw Cindy walking in the snow, and stopped to give her a lift home, O.K., and the trousers...?" "So you are telling me that you went to Bert's Burger, just before you picked Cindy up, and that you dropped your burger in your lap, when you bent over to open your truck door to let her in, and now you're cleaning off the ketchup..." "Get out of there Jessie. Yes. I can see you only have your boxer shorts on – Cindy has seen worse things than that, and give me those pants. I want to see this." "Stand there Jessie, yes right there next to Cindy." "Cindy, was Uncle Jessie eating a burger when he picked you up today? No. Right." "What do you mean Jessie? You think I'm gonna believe you when you say that the burger landed in your lap, then just rolled under your driver's seat, and you just carried on like nothing happened?" "Cindy, my lovely darling, did Uncle Jessie seem upset when you got into the truck – did he mention that he had dropped his burger, or that he had ketchup on his pants? No. I thought so." "So, Jessie: Where is the ketchup stain on your trousers? I don't see any." "Oh! It dried and flaked off did it? How lucky you are, because I do the wash around here, and I have never had ketchup behave like that! Oh! I'm glad you're amazed by this miraculous event Jessie, because I am not!" "Yes. I know you like Bert's Burgers Jessie. What did you say just then? You're mumbling Jessie – again. Oh! You said you like Bert's because of the ketchup that he uses, because it doesn't stain your clothes if you spill it, and that it flakes off and leaves no trace whatsoever. Yes, yes. Ole' Bert could make a million with that one, hey Jessie? ...I'm listening...!" "So, Jessie. Let's just say – let's just say for one fleeting moment, that I believe your story, and then the Berger, will still be under your driver's seat of your truck, right? What's the matter Jessie, are you coming down with the flu or something? Why, my poor dear, you're sweating like a Nixon upper lip honey-buns; and what is that wet stain growing larger and larger in the front of your jockey shorts, as we speak dear? Do you need a glass of water Jessie – my love? Orange - juice then...? No, nothing? Oh. You just want to go now do you, well, Jessie dearest, I won't be too much longer, honey, and stop shaking like that dear, you're making me nervous." Chapter 18. "What is this in your back pocket Jessie?" "What do you mean, "What back pocket?"" "The back pocket of your ketchupless jeans Jessie. Yes. This one!" "Oh. It's a hand embroidered handkerchief given to you by your late aunt Helen is it. Well, I'll be a Monkey's Uncle: Jessie, I never took you for being such a gentleman – using handkerchiefs and all now. May I see?" "What do you mean Jessie? What makes it sacred? Aunt Helen would love me to see her hand embroidered handkerchief, don't you think?" "Well, just looky what we have here. Why, was ole' Aunt Helen losing her faculties toward the end, because this looks a lot like a pair of panties to me, instead of a hand embroidered snot rag, Jessie? Owww! And look what we have inside, nothing but a great big brown and beige skid mark, sitting there silently, crusting up at the edges as it dries. It's a pity that they weren't made from Bret's magic ketchup, right Jessie, and then they would just flake off at the rub, and leave no stain – right!" "Did you forget to wipe your ass again my little angel? Was that a nod or a shake there my luv – I couldn't tell, really?" Chapter 19. "You - turn around. Yes. I mean you Jessie. Do it now!" "Okay, my sweet little cherub, lift your little mini skirt up. Higher...higher – just a little bit more honey; lift it up like this honey – high! How many times have I told you to do what your mamma tells you to do, when I tell you to do it, and not when you feel like doing it? Lift up your fucking skirt – Now! I want it all the way up to your waist belt if necessary. Good honey, now open your legs: Wide, when I tell you too -thank you." "My God! Mother's little baby has a badger's ass growing between her thighs. Mother and child ought to talk about shaving honey or maybe just a good trim. It must have come from the Greek father's side of the family." (Conjectured the mom). "Your mother didn't know that the lips of your slice were crusted-up with all of this drying crystallized foam everyday sweetheart". "Yes honey, your mother has to sniff you there, and taste your crystals." "Of course, it wasn't too bad, and your mother is happy that you enjoyed it." "Your mother has to feel inside you honey, Ok. There's your Hymen". "Yes. I'm relieved sweetie. Your mother wants at least one of the family to be a virgin when first married. Let, your mother tell you, honey. Her daughter isn't missing much, after thirty years. It's not exactly like sliced bread anymore - more like a sourdough baguette being ripped apart by a cheese gobbling member of the proletariat; intermittently swigging gob full's of half chewed mush down a neck with a labor's suntan attached to the back of it, whilst laying brazenly in the sun, just over the hedgerow, where it picks potato for a living." "Yes, honey. Your mom feels that the reconstituted thought of her own memories of courting, and marriage-hood are romantic; about as romantic as gutting a cow, held up by its hind legs, after being knocked-on-the-head – the billowing plumes of steam from the fallen entrails, playing portraits in the steaming chill of a midwinter's slaughter. Yes, sweetie, we all have to eat." Chapter 19. "Do it now Jessie. I didn't ask you to ask me why. I told you to drop your draws, by God. Drop them!" "You haven't got a hard on right now, because you're tired you say: Is that right Jessie? You always have a hard on when I hold your staff in my hand. Why is it like a wet noodle today, my stud? And what is all of this sticky, creamy cream oozing out of your bell end – staining the front of your boxers, ay? I've seen this before with you. After you have had your way with me, and fell off to sleep, grunting, snoring and farting like a hog after a good feed. Pull up your boxers Jessie. Pull them up!" "Okay: My sweet little darling daughter. Your mother wants you to know, that none of this is your fault, but that she has to know what is this white, creamy stuff dripping off your chin, and what is all of that white crusty stuff, in the corners of your beautiful lips? Mama wants to know baby. Come here, kiss mama on the lips, and let her lick them clean for you." "Yes. Mama thinks it is cum too. I love you, honey." Chapter 20. "I'm yelling at you because, somehow, you seem to have conveniently lost all comprehension unto the meaning of the English language right now. I told you to get your ass out here, and let's go and retrieve the burger, that you dropped and that – apparently, rolled under your driver's seat." "Granted. It's cold, and it's snowing. So what! Screw your pants. Git yo' ass out here right now, an' I don't care who in the mother fuck is looking – I gots' yo' keys, Jessie. Git out here now! Let's go find the burger sailor-boy, ass-hole. Cindy, yo' git yo' asshole out here too honey –- now!" Chapter 21. "Click." (Jessie's driver's side door opens). "Okay, Jessie, git the burger." " - I'm waiting..." "What do you mean Jessie? What yo' mean yo' can't find it!" "Perhaps yo' can't find it because it was never there in the first place –-honey!" "Don't ask me if I –- am crazy, you cock-sucking dam pedophile!" "I don't care that she is over eighteen, she still a child Jessie – still a fucking child man – a child...! "Don't try and tell me that you are not a 'short-eye', just because she is eighteen and a half you fucked up motherfucker; and don't try and insinuate that a mouse must have gotten into the cab, and eaten the burger, then mysteriously escaped, through that rust hole. A rat yes! But, a mouse – no. A mouse could never eat that much in a couple of hours. No. No! I can't believe it. It is not possible...?" "Where's the rat shit Jessie? Where is the shit of a mouse?" "No, Jessie, you and I can see that this is a rolled-up snot, from your own nose Jessie, yes, from your own nose. It may look like rat shit Jessie, but you and I know it is nothing more than just pure snot. So don't – please – try and sell me a bill of rights. I know which way is up Jessie. I know!" Chapter 22. "What are you sorry about Jessie? Sorry, perhaps, that you got caught...?" "Yes, sweetie, my lovely daughter, you heard me right. Go up to the house and git my .350, out of the right-hand side of my bed draw. Be careful honey, it's loaded. Bring it to me. Go, honey, go git mamma's rhythm-stick, 'cus Uncle Jessie is just about to learn how to dance." [Jessie]: "Fuck yo' Ruby. Yo' ain't got no proof, and the girl is too dumb to say what is an' what isn't, an' tomorrow, all the cum, and all the who-how, will be nothin' more than yesterdays news, honey. Now that's the bare facts, and that's the way it gonna stay. I'm gonna go now, and watch that I don't call the sherriff on yo' crazy ass – yo hear – Bitch mother fucker. Chapter 23. Jessie took off a'runnin' and left Ruby kneeling there in the snow alone: Her frigid tears meandering down her cheeks. He grinned, and even broke in and out of spurts of ebullience, and almost satirical laughter. Cindy returned and handed her mother the gun. Ruby, an ex-military combatant, leveled, both hands out, centered on the pivotal fulcrum of the shoulder blades. Leaned forward to allow for recoil, took several deep breaths, exhaled twice, and held the last one and fired three shots in rapid succession. Chapter 24. The first bullet hit an elderly Chinese gentleman, out walking with his wife of some 50 plus years, and tore the right-hand side of his scull off. He fell back kicking wildly, as if treading water, as one does, who hasn't, quite, learned how to swim yet as a kid. His walking-stick, though, gently finding the way for him -still, even though he was now on his back, pumping blood up into the freezing air, as if striving relentlessly up, and into Heaven itself. The second shot ripped the left-hand mammary gland off of his accompanying wife, as she turned sideward, to let the fleeing Jessie pass in his related furor of escape. The third shot – always the good one – seared, at a blistering velocity, directly between Jessie's legs. The round, a hollow-point, hit him square in the perineum. As the projectile shattered upon impact, and exploded into an ever expanding cone of razor sharp shrapnel, it severed the entirety of Jessie's genital region, expelling his scotum bag, along with its interior balls, and coupled with the full length of his now erect phallus, a phallus proud with the expectancy of – "getting away with it all", that every fetus learns at birth: That which is realized by the infant; that he, or she, has finally escaped, and has also evaded, the strangulating chicane of the mother's cunt during delivery. It's an age-old abscond. Chapter 25. The Old man's wife sank to her knees in the snow, clutching her chest akin to Sister Theresa, grasping her heart in prayer for humanity itself. She was looking for her left tit. It was gone, and still in the air via Ruby's second bullet of the trigger. Jessie's entire genital array burst out of the front of his jockeys, with a bloody vengeance. Chapter 26. As he fell, wounded headlong into the snow covered pavement, writhing in agony, his balls, scotum-bag, and penis ripped out of him, and still in the air, along with the old man's wife's left tit; he finally came to a skidding halt, leaving a runway of brightly colored blood trail behind him. Jessie - horrified; as he heard the dull thuds of his cock and balls land obliquely into the pristine whitness of the driven red stained snow, just inches ahead of his pain twisted, grotesque face of retribution, then came the flop, of the old woman's tit. Chapter 27. A wandering dog happened by; sniffing and ferreting about, and serendipitously came upon the steaming bodily remnants and hot entrails, of both Jessie's genitilia, and the old woman's tit. It stopped for a moment, looked Jessie, then the old woman straight in the eye, growlled, showed its teeth, summarilly gobbled up the twitching morsels, lifted its hind leg, urinated, then moved on unconcerned – furrowing away, with unconscious glee. Chapter 28. Jessie screamed out, that it was the bitch's fault, what with her firm apples, and boy-scout sleeping-bag ass-cheeks, that he as a man of the world, just had to..."Take care of business", the way a man ought to have done, and testified, that he was innocent, of all wrongdoing, according to history, and the way of the world, itself. Chapter 29. As Ruby and her daughter slowly made their way back up and into their apartment, arm in arm, to call the authorities, and to make chicken soup, the daughter asked her mom what would become of Uncle Jessie, now that he didn't have his balls and cock that he had always used to use women, in order for him to survive? Ruby said that she didn't know. Cindy naively suggested that Jessie could now bonafidely undergo gender transformation and reconstruction and not, this time, solely based on the boring psychological quips of the transgender lot, but more on the realism that his knackers were blown off, and that sometime in the future, he would desire to be fucked. Preferably, for him, by a woman in a man's body, who was given a dick instead of a hole at birth? Ruby contemplated the scenario for a moment, but rejected the premise on the foundation that women of this day and age, need to have balls, if not literally, then at least figuratively , but that Uncle Jess, now had neither. Upon entering the apartment, Ruby excused herself, and used a vibrator behind locked doors of the communal bathroom, in order to come, and squirt urine out of her vaginal lips, at her very own image, reflected back to her, in the slightly dimmed version, depicted – in real-time - upon the piss running glass monitor of the medicine cabinet mirror; a rather curious effect when mirrors are involved. She held apart her genitalia flaps, in a vee on her grieving cunt, by her index and middle fingers. She finished her gasping, just soon enough to be able to listen to the dying residual quips, of her daughter's self-inflicted orgasm too, out there beyond the door of the shitter, somewhere in the dark bedroom – which they shared. Skid Mark Hunter Ruby could only see her head in the mirror, whilst beating her meat due to the angle, but that was usually enough to take her over the top; watching her face distort, as the orgasm approached, then seeing it rain-away like a sidewalk chalked rendition, of a Picasso classic, by a grubby, old, failed artist, looking for alms slated for booze – and more chalk. Ruby's relaxation, whilst sitting on the bog, opened up her ring, and she underwent a good pound and a half of clay that fell out of her hole with little or no effort on her behalf. Now that's a good shit; she remembered saying to herself and as she rose from the throne denoting the far off – piquant - tone of a police siren approaching. She forgot to wipe her ass.