23 comments/ 68583 views/ 60 favorites Love vs. Hate By: kldude Special thanks to 1STGIRLPHOENIX for editing this story and for truly understanding what this story is all about. Thanks a lot! Notes from the author: This is a long story. If you're looking for some quick action then please don't scroll down the page. Just move on to another story. But if you're looking for a true erotic story with a touch of genuine feelings...well, all I can say is...today's your lucky day! Please send your valuable feedbacks because it will really help me to understand your reactions. But more importantly, it will encourage me to improve myself. All characters in this story are fictional and above 18 years of age. Any resemblance to a person, dead or alive, is completely co-incidental. Preface: When we talk about our feelings and emotions, we think of the times when we felt the ecstasy, fear, disappointment, shock, nervousness and what not. All of us are familiar with them but if I ask you to pen down all the different feelings and emotions you have experienced, believe me, it's a hell of a job. So why is it so complicated? The straightforward answer to this million dollar question is that we cannot generate our feelings. They just pop up naturally! If you don't believe me, just try to post a big smile the next time someone abuses you or perhaps, slaps you across your face (I hope you get the point!). Sure you can forge or pretend to display your emotions but then, somewhere deep within your heart, you know they are not the natural genuine feelings. To put it in simple words, a feeling is like a little chicken inside an egg. You cannot force it to come out of its shell. If you break the egg, you'll probably end up with a mess. But that's not what you wanted, right? The point is that you have to wait for the right moment. When the time is accurate, the chicken will break through the egg and pop out. So are we feeble and frail against our feelings and emotions? Definitely not! With a little bit of self-control and practice, we can control them and hold them within our desired limits. The bottom line is that we cannot create our feelings but when they confront us, the power to be in command of those emotions lies within us. So that's it? Is that what I wanted to tell you? No! I was just explaining the fundamental rules and principles before I move on to the exceptions. To put it differently, I was focusing on the basic cards in a pack before I move onto the Jokers. That's right! I'm talking about the 'Principle of Exceptions'. There are two special emotions that are the exceptions- Love and Hate. These are the feelings which all of us have experienced (or will experience) at some point in our lives. Each one of them is capable of altering our lives by forcing us to take actions which we would otherwise have refrained from. And, just like all of our feelings and emotions, we cannot create them. So why are they called the exceptions? The reason is that unlike others, we cannot even control them beyond a certain perimeter. You don't believe it, right? Then try explaining the famous saying, 'Love is blind' or the one that says 'Everything is fair in Love and War'. Well, I hope we're on the same bench now. So we know the basic feelings as well as the two exceptions. Can things get any worse? Yes, they can! Just imagine yourself being bound by Love and Hatred at the same time. Believe me, you would prefer to take a wrong turn in the Sahara Desert or go astray in the Antarctica. And how can I tell that? Well, all I can say is 'Been there, done that'. This reminds me. Did I introduce myself? I guess not! Hi, I'm Chris Lovato and the story I'm about to tell you took place two years ago when I was 22 years old. Well actually, it's not just a story; it's a battle between Love and Hatred. But more importantly, it is a modest attempt to define them. Enjoy! Chapter 1: The Beginning- 12th April It was Thursday afternoon but more importantly, it was the last day of my first year at the B-School. I was sitting on the last bench, looking outside the classroom window, staring at the concrete structures as Professor Smith gave his opinion on how we should spend the summer vacation and plan for the final year. For a moment I thought the time was blocked when I glanced at the wall clock above the white board which read 3:52 pm. It meant that I still had 8 minutes to bear the frustration. It was the last lecture of the year and Professor Smith was going on and on and on. When he started getting on my nerves, I leaned my head on the desk and closed my eyes, thinking about the plans I had made for the summer. Suddenly, I heard the magic words. "Thank you, class. We'll meet after the summer. Have a great time!" God! What took him so long to say that? I pulled my bag over the shoulders and made my way out of the classroom. ******** Now you must be thinking that I was a brainless jerk who disliked books and studies, right? Well, hello! I'm talking about the B-School! Before you get the wrong impression about me, let me tell something about myself. I had always been an above average student throughout my academic carrier. After I graduated in Commerce, I decided to pursue M.B.A. in Finance and Management and gave the entrance exam. Thanks to the two months of sleepless hardworking nights (and a dash of luck) I found myself in the best B-School (in the city of course!). So am I tall, dark and handsome? Well. I had a series of girlfriends and none of them had ever complained. So I guess that's a good endorsement. Standing at 5'8'', I have an athletic body (thanks to the Basketball team at high school). Recently, I had started hitting the gym which helped me to build a few muscles, giving me an edge over my looks. My first girlfriend said that she particularly like my light brown eyes and wished she could just look into them all the time (though it never really happened cause we broke up in 5 days). I think that should sum up. ********** As I drove back home in my car, I felt the thrill running down my veins. The final year would be starting somewhere in mid-July so I was really looking forward to the 3 months break because the year end examination had sucked out all my energy as I studied day in day out. Entering the neighborhood, a filthy thought struck my mind. I realized that the summer break meant that I would get a lot of time to spend at home (that's not the disgusting part) but it also meant that I would have to spend a lot of time with that bitch. ********** I'm talking about my little sister-Kate Lovato. She was 20 years old then (two years younger than me) and had just completed her second year at the college. Kate and I had never got along. Right from our childhood, we had differences over almost everything and by the time we were teenagers, we always ended up with heated arguments whenever we had an interaction. Eventually, we lost the respect for each other and always acted as if the other never existed. I still remember the day when I was in the 8th grade. Kate and I had a fight over the television remote and dad locked us in his room. He thought we would sort out the issue. By the time dad opened the door, my t-shirt was in tatters and Kate ended up with a broken nail. As far as her looks are concerned, Kate is a 'jaw-dropper'. I hate to say (probably because I'm jealous) but she was one of the hottest girls in the college. I know that because I was in my third and final year at college when Kate was a first year freshman. I would probably rank her at the fourth position in the list of hot and sexy girls at the college during my final year. I agree she was not among the top three. But hey! When you're talking about 150 odd girls, being in the fourth position is not that bad. Standing at 5'6'', Kate has a slim and curvy body. I had once checked her bra in the laundry (out of curiosity) so I know she's a 34-C. Her breasts are perfect for a body like hers. Her jet black hair frames her face perfectly and falls gently down her neck, past her shoulders. The texture of her smooth tan skin is simply intoxicating. Her long slender legs merge into a round tight ass which is the best feature of her body. On top all of this, she has the same light brown eyes (thanks to our mom). But she's a bit weird. Almost every second guy in the college would hit on her but she never gave them the bait. Even my friends tried their luck when we were in the final year but she would never fall in the trap. Initially, she dated a couple of guys in the first few months of college but since then she was single. Even when I completed my first year at the B-School, she still didn't have a boyfriend. Sometimes, I thought she swung the other way because she would spend all weekends with her girlfriends, especially with Sara- her best friend who lived in the same neighborhood. But Kate also flirted with most of the boys so I never gave it a second thought. Okay, now I better stop talking about Kate because it makes a bit uncomfortable. So what about my family? Well, my father had passed away two years ago after a long battle with cancer. He was great man! I had always respected him for what he was and how he had brought up the family. He worked for a law firm apart from making investments in equities. He had initially invested his small surplus capital and by the time he passed away, he left us a mammoth bank balance, thanks to some smart investment decisions and the two years equity bull market. As far as mom is concerned, she's a housewife. There's not much to talk about her apart from the fact that she's a loving and caring mom (as all mothers are!). ********** When I parked into the driveway, mom's car was missing so I figured she must have gone somewhere. I entered the house with my spare keys and went straight to my room for a nap. It was past 7:30 pm when I woke up. Mom had returned and she was preparing the dinner when I entered the kitchen. We had a little talk before I went to my room to clean up the study table. By the time I packed my first year books, mom called me for dinner. As usual, we ate on the dining table while Kate had her dinner on the couch. When we finished our dinner, I left the house to meet Natasha. ********** Natasha was my girlfriend. She was 22 years old (only 9 days younger than me). She was pursuing her M.B.A. in HRM Operations in a different B-School (in the same city). Natasha had completed her first year at the B-School only a few days before I got my break. Unlike my previous girlfriends who were hot and sexy, Natasha was cute and sexy. Natasha and I had been together for almost 18 months. We initially met each other at a common friend's birthday party and instantly felt attracted to each other. Natasha lived in the same neighborhood, only a couple of blocks away from my house so we met every night after dinner to take a walk. Chapter 2: Definition of Hatred The first two weeks of the summer were great. Natasha and I went for fishing, watched movies and went to clubs and what not. As usual I had some heated encounters with Kate but they were offset by the time I spend with Natasha. It was Friday afternoon when Natasha came over at my place. We had decided to watch a movie but she somehow got involved with mom and they decided to visit the mall. Mom insisted me to join them but I flatly refused her invitation because of my previous experience with her weekly 'mall-crawl'. So they left the house, leaving me behind, all alone and bored to death. After playing with my X-Box for an hour, I decided to relax a bit and picked up a fashion magazine. I was lying on the bed, flipping through the pages when the bedroom door bang opened. It was Kate. Not again! What does she want now? She stormed in and came over to the side of the bed, standing next to me. Before I could ask what her problem was, she snatched the magazine from my hand. "Hey, what the hell..." "Shut up, you jerk!" she yelled at me. "Where's that girlfriend of yours?" "I don't want to talk...." "I'll tell you where she is right now! She's at the mall- shopping with mom! That bitch is trying to make her way into the family and I don't like it." I got up and stood in front of her. She was taking deep breaths and her eyes were slightly red because of the anger. I knew it was useless to argue with her so I decided to close the topic. "Listen, Kate..." "No you listen!" she snapped. "Tell that bitch..." "Shut up!" I shouted at her. "At least she's better than you!" "No she's not! She's just a whore!" Smack. I delivered a stinging slap on her face. "You...bastard!" she raged, trying to hit me back but I quickly grabbed her hand. When she used her other hand, I grasped it too. Before she could react any further, I pulled her towards the closet and pushed her against the door on her back and pressed my body against hers. I dragged both her arms above her head and tightened my grip on them. My face was only a few inches away from hers so we felt each others warm breaths on our lips. "Now listen, bitch!" I said in a low tone. "Natasha is my girlfriend...and I don't want to hear anything about her...especially from that filthy mouth of yours. Do you understand?" Kate didn't give any response. But the weird thing was that she didn't fight back. She just stood there, staring at me. There was a pause for a few seconds as we continued to stare at each other. I then realized that we were in an intimate position. I felt her breasts against my chest as she took slow deep breaths. I also realized that her crotch was pressed against my cock, making it hard inside my jeans. I could see the dampness in her eyes as she stared at me. When she finally blinked, tears rolled down her cheeks. Suddenly, I felt that I was dominating my sister so I released her hands. I thought she would take the opportunity and push me away but she didn't. Closing her eyes, Kate leaned her head forward as if she was trying to kiss me. When I felt her nose touching mine, I pulled myself away from her. Before I could ask her what she was trying to do, she walked out the room. ********** Dropping on my bed, I closed my eyes and replayed the entire episode- from the beginning till the climax. What the hell was she trying to do? Breaking free from my thoughts, I realized that Natasha would probably come back with mom. So I picked up my cell phone from the side table and called her. I told her everything about my encounter with Kate (except for the shocking part). "What should I do?" she nervously asked me. "I think you should go home when you finish the shopping. If you come back, Kate would probably create another scene." "Okay, I'll meet you after dinner." "And Natasha," I quickly added. "Don't tell anything to mom about all this." ********** I spend the entire evening in my room, lying on my bed, thinking about Kate and her behavior. The more I thought about the word she used for Natasha, my annoyance for her intensified. The only way to stop thinking about her was to occupy myself with something else. So I picked my laptop. I was checking my mails when I heard a couple of knocks on the door. "Come in" It was mom. "Chris, can I have a word with you" Shit! That bitch must have told her everything. "Sure, mom," I said without looking at her. "What's wrong with Kate? She has locked herself in her room." "How am I supposed to know," I lied. "I guess you're right. Anyways, dinner will be ready in a few minutes." "Okay." ********* When I entered the kitchen, Kate was sitting on the chair at the dining table. I took the chair opposite to her and sat down without making an eye contact. As soon as mom took her seat, she asked her, "Kate, what's wrong?" God! There goes the dinner! "I'm fine." "But the red eyes are telling something else. Why were you crying, honey?" "I had a fight with Sara," she blurted as she stood up and picked up her plate. "I hope you're happy, mom!" And with that she went to her room and locked the door. Wow! Where did that come from? After we finished the dinner, I left the house to meet Natasha. ********** Few days later, Kate was back to normal- talking rudely to mom, shouting and yelling around the house and fighting with me over pointless issues. The next Saturday evening, Natasha was at my place. Mom had gone to the club and Kate was not in the house. We were sitting on the living room couch and watching a movie. Natasha rested her head on my chest and my hand was around her waist. When the movie ended, I turned off the television. "So what should we do?" she asked me as she raised her head. "I think I have an idea." "And what would that be?" She looked a bit confused. I leaned forward and kissed her on her lips, gently sucking on them. With my free hand, I brushed off the hair from her cheek and tucked it behind her ear, placing it behind her head to pull her towards me. As our kiss became passionate, I heard Kate. "There's a place called bedroom for doing such things!" Natasha pulled away quickly, breaking our lip-lock. She was clearly embarrassed with Kate's presence. I turned around on the couch and saw her standing in the living room, staring at us as if she we had committed a crime. "Mind your own business," I said blankly. "That's exactly what I'm trying to do," she snapped. "I'm stopping this bitch from turning our house into a brothel." "Shut up, Kate!" You better mind your language." "Chris, forget it," Natasha interrupted as she got up from the couch. "I think I should leave." "Don't try to act so innocent, you bitch!" Kate targeted Natasha. "If I was 5 minutes late; I would have found you screwing him on the couch." Getting up from the couch, I warned her, "Kate, get out of here before I loose my temper." "Yes, I will! Because this place is starting to stink." She took a few steps towards her room before stopping and turning around. "Take my advice, Chris. You better get her into your bed...because this bitch is so desperate...she'll catch the first guy she meets on her way back." That's it! "You'll pay for this, slut!" I stormed towards her in sheer rage. I swear I would have punched her that time but before I could reach for her, I saw Natasha running out of the living room. Shit! "Natasha, wait!" I ran after her but she went out of the house, closing the door behind her. Finally, catching her hand on the driveway I stopped her. She was crying profoundly. "I'm sorry Natasha," I managed to say as I caught my breath. "You know she's crazy." "I don't want to talk about this, Chris," she said. "Just let me go." She pulled her hand away and walked out of the driveway. Standing alone, I felt my blood boiling inside me. My anger for Kate had reached the break-even point. That's it! It's time to end this once and for all. When I stormed into her room, Kate was sitting on her bed. I went over to her and pulled her up to make her stand in front of me. "You want to hit me again? Go ahead! That's all you can do, Chris." "There's no point in doing that," I replied. "You're crazy! You've lost it, Kate." "I did the right thing," she argued. "Oh, yeah? Well I think I should do the right thing as well." The expressions on her face changed slightly as she tried to figure out what I was saying. But she was completely unaware of my decision. There was a tension building inside her as she tried to figure out my intention. "From this moment," I said in a low pitch, looking straight at her, "You are not my sister." I stressed on each word as I continued, "I hate you, Kate! The moment I get my degree, I swear I'll move out of this place." Love vs. Hate And for the first time in my life, I saw the panic on her face. She never expected this decision from me. "Chris, I'm sorry..." "Shut up!" I cut her off. "I don't want you in my life anymore." "Chris, I did all this because...." She faltered suddenly. "Because what? Answer me!" I demanded. "Because I love you, God damnit!" she yelled. "No you don't!" I shouted back. "You can't love anyone Kate. Not even yourself!" I thought I already had enough of that non-sense so I turned around to leave the room but Kate grabbed my hand and started to cry. "Chris, please! Don't do this to me." "It's all over, Kate," I pushed her away and she fell on her bed. As I made my way out of her room, I heard her whimpers. "Chris, I'm sorry. Please, listen to me." I went to my room and locked the door just in case she came back. And indeed she did! For the next hour or so, Kate banged the door as she cried and pleaded me to open the door and forgive her. "Open the door, Chris. Please! Listen to me. I'm your sister...don't do this to me...I love you so much...open the door...damn it!" But I completely ignored her. As I rested my head on the pillow, I felt myself being transferred to a different dimension. I felt that I was on a different frequency because Kate was banging the door and yelling as loud as she could and yet her voice was getting fader and fader in my ears. That was the moment I recognized the difference between Anger and Hatred. I realized that all those years, I was just angry and annoyed with Kate. I had never hated her. It was just my rage and fury because I always fought back at her. But the moment she abused Natasha, she had crossed the break-even point and now I hated her. I was no longer interested in arguing with her or fighting with her or talking to her. In fact, I didn't want her in my life anymore. That is the difference! When you are furious with someone, you want to fight back, hit him, abuse him and make a hell out of his life. But when you hate someone, it's all over! You don't want to hurt that person anymore. You just want to throw him out of your life. And it's not easy because it hurts you as well. I finally realized what hatred is all about. Hatred is the fire that not only burns the person you hate but it also burns yourself. Kate eventually realized that I would not budge so she went to her room. When mom came back, I acted naturally because I didn't want to involve her in this matter. Chapter 3: Definition of Love When I went to my room after dinner, I got a call from Kate but I hung up and switched off the phone. The next morning, I turned on my cell phone and found 14 messages from Kate. Without reading a single one, I deleted all of them. I patched up with Natasha and assured her that Kate would never be the cause of tension between us. For the next few days, Kate kept calling me and messaging me but I completely ignored her. She even started sending e-mails with titles such as 'please forgive me', 'I'm sorry', 'please talk to me' and what not. But I never read them and just deleted them. Whenever mom was not around the house, Kate would bring out the topic and try to start a conversation. But I never gave her a response. I would lock my room whenever we were alone in the house. If she was already waiting for me in my room, I would just walk out of the house. Things continued in the same fashion for the next 10 days or so. ********* On Friday, 18th May, we went to Uncle James' house to celebrate his birthday. It was past midnight by the time the party died out. My aunt suggested us to stay over for the night since all my mom's cousins were staying back for the night. Mom and Kate agreed to the idea but I refused because I had already made plans for the next morning. The moment I gave my explanation, Kate added, "I think I'll go with Chris." Oh, No! I knew the plan she had made in her mind. The drive back home was more than an hour and she intended to talk to me. I would be doing the driving so there was no way I could get away from that situation. "I think Kate should stay with you, mom," I suggested. "No way, mom! I'm going with Chris," she argued. "Okay, honey. You can go with Chris." Mom agreed. Shit! As soon as we hit the road, Kate initiated her plan. On the expressway, I drove a bit faster than usual, probably because I was irritated with Kate. She just went on and on and on. "Shut up!" I shouted as I turned my head to look at her. And that was the biggest mistake I had made. I must have hit the accelerator a bit too much. When a heard a loud horn, I realized I had gotten too close to the car ahead us. Seemingly, at once the brake lights of that car yelled at me and I hit the brakes in response. But the tires couldn't handle the sudden halt and our car skidded. To avoid the possibility of crashing with the cars behind us, I turned left, careening onto the mud covered slop away from the road. My seat belt was cutting into my chest with every jolt until the car crashed into a tree. Kate had apparently forgotten to wear her seat belt because the moment we hit the tree, her body was tossed inside the car and her head dashed against the front board. When the fear had washed out, I looked at Kate. She was out her seat and her head was still leaning on the front board. "Kate!" When I pulled her up on her seat, her forehead was bleeding and she was lifeless. "Shit!" Removing my handkerchief from the pocket, I tied it around her forehead to prevent the loss of blood. Miraculously, the engine was still running. I knew it was dangerous to drive the car but I had to rush to the hospital. Getting out of the car, I picked up Kate, placed her on the backseat and called mom. ********** I was waiting in the hallway when mom and Uncle James arrived. "How's Kate?" mom cried. "The doctors are attending her," I replied. We sat down and I told them how the accident took place. I told them everything except for the tension between me and Kate. Finally, the doctor came out of the Emergency Room. "How's my daughter?" mom asked him impatiently. "Your daughter is absolutely fine, Mrs. Lovato. I've been here since 8 years and this is the first miraculous case I've seen." "What do you mean?" Uncle James asked. "She's only got four stitches above her right eyebrow. That's it! Not a single scratch on the body. And within a month, you want even see the stitch marks." "Oh, thank God!" Mom took a sigh of relief. "How many days does she have to stay here?" Uncle James asked. "Are you kidding me?" the doctor laughed. "She can leave tomorrow morning itself. In fact she can follow her normal routine." Before he left, the doctor took me to the side for a talk. "Your sister really loves you, young man! She was unconscious when you brought her but when we were giving her the anesthesia, the only word she was murmuring was 'Chris'. You're lucky to have a sister like her." And he was right. Because the next morning when Kate finally opened her eyes and saw mom sitting next to her bed, she hastily asked, "Where's Chris? Is he alright?" "Yes, honey. He's sitting on the other side of the bed. Look!" mom pointed at me. Kate turned her face and saw me sitting on the chair, next to her bed. "I'm glad you're okay," she said. Mom went to complete the paper work, leaving us alone in the room. I felt a bit awkward as I tried to look away from Kate. A few minutes later, she touched my hand and I finally looked at her. "I love you, Chris," she sighed. Her eyes were getting damp as she looked at me. I've always considered myself as a tough guy. The last time I had cried was the day when my father had passed away. But sitting next to Kate, hearing those words made me weak. I held back my emotions and gave her a smile which she truly deserved. ********** By afternoon, Kate was back home. The next day onwards, she was back to her schedule- doing her work and spending the evenings with her Sara. I still didn't talk to her because I was feeling guilty about my rude behavior. I wanted to talk to her but didn't have the courage to face her. The doctor had prescribed a few painkillers for the whole week so that she could sleep well and Mom made sure she took her medicine every night in spite of her silly excuses. The next Saturday, I was checking my e-mails when mom called me to her room. "Chris, I'm going to the club for the party and I won't be back by midnight. I want you to give Kate her tablets after dinner. Today is the last dose, remember?" "Okay." ********** When we finished the dinner, I went to Kate's room for the first time after the big break-up. She was sleeping on the bed, reading her fashion magazine while I stood at the door. "Come in, Chris," she smiled. "You need to take these," I handed her the tablets and a glass of water. She always made excuses when mom gave them to her but that night, she didn't argue with me. "Thanks," she smiled again. I was getting a bit nervous so I quickly left the room. ********** Mom was back before midnight and went to sleep. For the next one hour, I watched T.V. before deciding to hit the bed. When I got up from the couch, I saw Kate's bedroom door was open so I went to close it. When I looked inside, Kate was fast asleep. She was lying on her back with the sheets pulled up to her lower neck. One hand was above her head while the other rested on her stomach. But she seemed to be a bit uncomfortable because her head was slightly off-center on the pillow so I decided to place it suitably. When I came close to the side of the bed, I saw that she had kept a book underneath her pillow which was causing the problem. As slowly as possible, I removed the book, making her head more comfortable on the pillow. When I placed the book on the side table, I saw the title which read 'My Personal Diary'. Turning around to leave the room, I had a thought. May be she must have written something about me! Before you get me wrong, let me make it crystal clear. It's absolutely wrong to read someone's personal diary. But the situation that confronted me was an exception. I just had to know what she thought about me. I had always fought with her, argued with her, slapped her once and even tried to break our blood relationship but still she cared for me. Why didn't she hate me back? I had to know the reason. I wanted to know how she felt about me. So I did what I had to do. I picked up her diary, closed her door quietly and went to my room and locked it from inside. Turning on the light on my study table, I took the chair and placed the book on the table. For a while, I just observed it, wondering if I was doing the right thing. May be I'll just go through some random pages. When I glanced at the wall clock, it was past 1:00 am in the morning. To be precise, it was past 1:16 am in the morning on Sunday- 27th May. As I took a final look at the cover page, I knew I was about to get some true revelations about Kate. But more importantly, I was about to know what she thought about me. And was I wrong? Definitely not! When I read the first page where she wrote about herself, the 12th line caught my eyes which read: The love of my Life: Chris Lovato- my Bro. That's it! I'm reading this whole diary. And I did the same. I read the whole diary- all 146 days- from 1st January up to Saturday, 26th May. So was it a life-changing experience? Hell yes! But more importantly, it was an eye-opener. I didn't find a single day where Kate hadn't mentioned me. There was not a single page where I didn't find the word 'Chris'. As I read each page, Kate made me realize the true meaning of Love. 12th January: Sara and I were standing in her balcony when we saw a shooing star. Sara told me to make a wish and I did. I wished that Chris would understand me someday and love me as much as I love him. 5th February: As usual, I fought with Chris because of Natasha. When will he understand me? When will he recognize the love in my eyes? 14th February, Valentine's Day: I spend the whole evening in my room, crying on my bed, holding Chris' photo while he went out with Natasha. Sara wanted to hook me up with a guy but I flatly refused. If someone was going to be my Valentine, it would be Chris and no one else. 10th March: Chris was not feeling well this morning. The doctor said he was suffering from a severe case of food poisoning. I just couldn't see him in pain. So in the evening, I walked bare footed to the Church to pray for him. 24th March: The one day trip to the camp was great. I really had a great time, especially with Sara. But the only sad part of the trip was that I couldn't see Chris for more than 24 hours. 12th April: Today, Chris completed his first year at the B-School. I'm really happy for him. And the best part is that he will spend more time at home during the summer break which means that I will get to see him more often. 24th April: One step close: I fought with Chris because of Natasha and for the first time in my life, Chris slapped me. I was really hurt by his actions. Why did he hit me? But it was also the best day of my life. When Chris pushed me back on the closet door, he pressed his body against me. For the first time, I felt his breath on lips. The emotions just took over me and I tried to kiss him but he pulled away and left me. Why can't he see the love in my eyes? Oh God! I was right. She did try to kiss me that afternoon. 5th May: Dooms Day for me: Chris and I had the biggest fight because I abused Natasha when I found them kissing on the living room couch. I just couldn't control my anger when I saw that scene. But that was the worst mistake of my life. Chris told me that I was no longer his sister and that he hated me. I expressed regret but he just wouldn't listen. When will he understand that I cannot live without him? Finally, I reached the last written page of the diary: Saturday, 26th May- the day which had ended only a few hours ago. 26th May: Sunny Days are back! Finally! For the first time after the big fight, Chris came in my room after dinner to give me the medicines. All he said was 'you need to take these' as he handed me the tablets. But I was ecstatic! At least he said something to me. If this is the only way that he will talk to me then I wish I should never get well. Never ever! Tears dropped down onto the page as I read the last line. I realized what a stupid jerk I was. She's ready to suffer the pain just so that I would talk to her. When I glanced at the wall clock, it was past 5:30 am in the morning. I got up from the chair and went to Kate's room. She was still sleeping in the same position. I slowly raised the side of the pillow and placed the diary just as it was. Taking one last look at her face, I went back to my room. Resting my head on the pillow, I stared at the ceiling, looking back at the mistakes I had made. As the first rays of the early morning sun brightened the room, I realized the true meaning of love. Love is like water- crystal clear, adaptive in nature, capable of absorbing almost every element but more importantly, it is indispensable for life. Chapter 4: The Apprehension "Chris?" I heard a soft voice and felt a hand brushing the hair on my head. Opening my drowsy eyes, I saw mom. She was sitting next to me on the bed. "It's past 11:00 am in the morning. Are you feeling all right?" "I'm just tired," I managed to choke out. "I need some sleep." "Okay, honey!" she gave a kiss on my forehead before leaving the room and I dozed off again. When I got up and took a shower, it was past noon. I finished my lunch and retreated to my room without talking much to mom. Since it was Sunday, everyone was at home. I was lying on my bed when I got a call from Natasha but I didn't answer her because I was no were close to myself. I was still thinking about Kate's diary and the feelings she had for me when I heard a knock on the door. It was mom. She came over to the bed and sat next to me. "Feeling all right," she asked me, placing her hand on my forehead. "I'm fine mom. I was just a bit tired because of watching the late night movie," I lied. "Anyways, the doctor had told us to remove the bandage from Kate's forehead today, remember?" she asked. I just nodded. "Well, I just did!" she smiled. "And I could hardly see the stitch marks. By next week, they will almost fade away." "Great!" I smiled back. ********** I spend the whole day inside my room- lying on my bed, sitting on the study table and standing at the window- all the time, cursing myself for treating Kate like a scrap. By the time mom called me for dinner, I had received more than 20 calls from Natasha but I ignored all of them. After dinner, I once again went to my room and became disoriented in my thoughts. It was past midnight when I opened the bedroom door to get a glass of water from the kitchen. When I passed through the living room, Kate was sitting on the couch, watching some movie. Some decisions in life are so complex that you can't make up your mind. The more you consider, the more intricate they become. But there's a smallest possible moment when you hear the sudden voice from your heart. It comes from within and you know it's the exact thing to do. There's no need to reassess the conclusion. It's ultimate! You've got the answer! The road ahead unexpectedly, seems to be visible and you can spot the destination. And how am I supposed to know these things? Well, that's exactly what happened to me. As I placed the empty glass of water on the kitchen platform, I heard that paranormal voice from my heart. Just do it Chris! Tell Kate that you love her. And that's exactly what I did. Kate was still sitting on the couch when I entered the living room. She was wearing only a plain light yellow t-shirt that reached down to the middle of her thighs. I went over the couch and stood next to her. "Kate, can I have a talk with you?" The moment I said that, Kate looked up and I saw the sparkle in her eyes as she smiled at me and turned off the TV. "I can't believe it, Chris! You are finally talking to me!" Kate smiled at me as she got up from the couch and stood in front of me, looking at me with an anxious look on her face as she waited to hear me again. "Kate...I...uh...." Shit! Just say it, idiot! "What is it, Chris?" she looked a bit nervous. "Well, actually, I wanted to say that..." Fuck! Why am I stammering? "You're still angry with me, right?" Kate said. "No! I...I want to tell you something!" "What is it, Chris? Forget it! Actions are better than words. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her to me. Before she could say something, my lips crushed hers. I swear I didn't know how she would react because we had fought like Tom and Jerry from childhood and all of a sudden I was pressing my lips against hers. But I didn't have to wait long to get my answer. Our lips remained pressed against each other only for 3 to 4 seconds before Kate parted her lips and sucked on my lower lip. Finally, she was getting what she had desired. Without giving a damn to anything, I kissed her back. I released her wrist and placed my hand around her waist while the other one reached for her breast. As soon I grabbed her tit through her t-shirt, I felt her nipple through the thin material which meant that she was not wearing a bra. Her soft plump lips felt like rose petals. Kate gasped when my tongue slipped out and touched her lips. Tilting her head slightly, she touched my tongue with hers and willingly opened her mouth invitingly to me. Love vs. Hate I pushed my tongue in her welcoming mouth and she forced hers into my mouth. We sucked on each others tongues, occasionally moving them around. Each time, she tilted her head from left to right; she pushed her tongue deeper inside my mouth. Kate drew me into an embrace as our kiss became more passionate. I removed my hand from her breast and brushed the hair from her cheek. Tucking it behind her ear, I placed my hand behind her head to pull her closer to me. My cock was growing inside my boxers as it pressed tightly against her crotch. Kate's hands were roaming all over my back as she kissed me ardently. Then she moved her hands upward and placed them on the back of my head to pull me closer. I was getting desperate and impatient so I dropped my hands and placed them on her hips. Holding her in that position for a few seconds, I dropped them further down to the back of her thighs. With one powerful heave, I lifted her off the floor and she straddled me, wrapping her legs around my waist. Placing my hands on her back, I walked towards her room. All the while, we were still kissing each other. I was getting a bit frantic because I was falling short of my breath but Kate was kissing me more and more passionately, sucking on my tongue as if there was no tomorrow. When we reached her bed, I was almost out of air. Placing my hands on her hips, I pushed her away and gently dropped her on the bed to break the longest kiss of my life, apart from being the most passionate one. "I love you, Chris," she panted, looking straight at me. Her eyes were digging into me. "I love you, Kate," I replied. We looked at each other a moment before I went to close the door and locked it. I turned on the lights, switched on the air conditioner and went back to the bed. Pulling off my t-shirt, I climbed on the bed and mounted her. My raging hard cock was pressing against her crotch as she wrapped her legs around me and pulled me down to give me another hot kiss. I was enjoying our lip-lock when suddenly; Kate unwrapped her legs and rolled us over on the bed so that she was on top of me. Breaking the kiss, she pulled herself up, kneeling over my flat stomach. When she arched back, her firm ass brushed against my hard cock, making it twitch inside my boxers. As she looked down at me, I finally saw the love in her eyes- the love which she always wanted me to see in her eyes. Without breaking the eye-contact, she grabbed the end of her t-shirt and pulled it over her head and dropped it on the floor, revealing her black lacy panties and the most gorgeous breasts. The texture of her smooth skin was stimulating. Her breasts were round and firm, pushing out proudly as if they were making a bold statement. The dark pink nipples stuck out perfectly from the centre of her breasts and looked like little cherries. I cupped both her breasts and fondled them gently. They were more firm than I had expected. Kate closed her eyes and arched back, pushing her tits forward against my hands. I started rubbing her hard nipples with my palm by moving it in a circular motion and she let out a moan. Removing my hands from her breast, I placed them around her. Pulling myself up, I swiftly rolled us over so that I was on top of her once again. "Hey! How come you get to be on top?" she complained. But there was a smile on her face. "Because I'm your big bro, remember?" I replied and gave her a peck on her lips. I started kissing and licking her long neck, slowly moving down to her shoulders before I moved down to the lovely tits. I planted small kisses all over her right breast, making sure that I ignored her nipple. As I continued to kiss her right breast, I allowed my hand to work on the other one, fondling it a bit harder. Whenever my lips came close to her nipple, I diverted my path and moved away, making her anxious. The third time I came close to her nipple, Kate pleaded, "Don't tease me, Chris...please!" I ignored her appeal and continued my work. Kate placed her hands on my hair, brushing them gently with her fingers. But I knew her true intentions. She was planning to push me down on her nipple, the next time I came close to it. But I was way too smart for such silly tactics. I kissed all the way down to the underside of her breast where it met her chest. Then, slipping out my tongue, I slowly dragged it upward, feeling her smooth warm skin. I stopped when I reached an inch or so below her nipple and stayed there as my tongue touched her skin. "Just do it!" she said. There was a hint of desperation in her tone but I still wanted to tease her. Grabbing both her hands, I pulled them away from my hair and placed them on either side, tightening my grip on them so that she could not move them. Moving my tongue upward, I circled her right nipple, making sure that I didn't touch it. I felt the tension rising inside her body as I continued to tease her. When I glanced up at Kate, her eyes were closed and she was gently biting her lower lip. Her breathing was slow but deep. "Please..." she moaned. I was sure that I had teased her enough so I moved my tongue over her anxiously waiting nipple and pushed hard against it before closing my mouth around it. "Yes..." she moaned again with satisfaction. As I licked her nipple, it was getting stiffer and stiffer inside my mouth. Kate was getting used to the sensation as she moaned in pleasure. But I still had one more weapon in my arsenal and I decided to use it. Taking her completely by surprise, I tentatively sucked her nipple in my mouth, creating a wild pressure on her breast which was beyond her imagination. Her body was getting a bit stiffer as her breaths became fast and uneven. I sucked harder than before and cupped her left breast with my free hand and squeezed it roughly. And that did it! I felt her body spasm and heard a deep groan as a powerful orgasm hit her body. Releasing her right nipple, I quickly move onto her left nipple and sucked it with intense desperation while I fondled the other one. For a few seconds, Kate's breathing stopped as she experienced the supernatural sensation. Finally, when her orgasm subsided, her body went limp. It was the first time that I had made a girl cum by working on her tits and I was proud of it. Believe me! I had never concentrated on any of my girlfriends' tits for so long. I just wanted to eat them or fuck them. But the situation I was confronting was an exception. Kate was not my girlfriend or fuck-buddy. She was the love of my life. When Kate opened her eyes, my face was hovering over her and our lips were engagingly close to each other. "Are you okay?" I asked her inspite of knowing the answer. Kate simply nodded and smiled at me and I gave her a peck on her lips. "That was just a trailer!" I grinned as I moved down again, kissing her silky-smooth skin all the way down to her belly button. Slipping out my tongue, I circled it, making her squirm and moan. "Ticklish?" I asked her. "Slightly..." I cupped her breasts and gave a final kiss on her belly button before moving down to the final destination of the journey. Kate expected me to quickly go down on her pussy and eat her but I was still in the mood of playing the 'tease please' game. I wanted to give her unanticipated pleasures. Finally, I planted a kiss on the waistband of her panties. Instead of moving down on her panty-covered pussy, I moved further down until I got out of the bed. Kneeling on the side of the bed, I grabbed her hips and pulled her towards me so that I was kneeling between her legs and only the upper half of her body was on the bed. My face was close to her wet pussy and she felt my breath directly on the thin material. Slipping out my tongue, I gave her a slow firm lick on her pussy through the thin material and for the first time I tasted her sweet nectar. Her panties were soaking wet because of the orgasm. Kate was getting more and more desperate by this teasing game. When she tucked her fingers inside the waistband to push down her panties, I grabbed her hands and pulled them away. Placing them on either side, I held them firmly. "Not again!" Kate sighed. "Pull down my panties, jerk...please!" I replied by giving her another long firm lick, feeling her soft outer lips opening under my tongue. That was the boarder of my patience. To hell with this teasing stuff! I released her hands and pulled down her panties to reveal a smooth clean-shaven pussy which was gleaming with her pussy juices. When I pulled her panties down to her thighs, I realized that it was difficult to remove them completely because her legs were spread wide open and I was kneeling between them. I got up to pull them down completely but Kate was smarter then me. She closed her legs, folded her knees and removed her panties and dropped them on the floor. I quickly grabbed her knees and spread them wide apart and knelt down in the same position and buried my face in her soaking wet pussy. "Oh, Shit..." she groaned. I lost myself in the silky velvet of her slit under my tongue as I tasted her juices. I lashed my tongue over her clit, making small circles and driving her crazy. My cock was throbbing hard and I thought I would explode inside my boxers. I ran my tongue from the top of her slit to the bottom, rubbing it from side to side. Kate was moaning with pleasure. She placed her hands on my hair and pushed my face on her pussy. "Suck it, Chris...eat me!" she cried out. "I love you so much..." The musky scent of her pussy was filling my nostrils, intoxicating my mind as I sucked her outer lips. My lips slurped softly, coaxing more and more nectar on my tongue. Kate was getting a bit impatient so she plunged my face harder in her pussy and pushed her hips upward at the same time. After a while, I grabbed her hips to prevent her erratic movements. I knew she was getting close to her second orgasm so once again I decided to use the final weapon in the arsenal. I pulled her legs over my shoulders to get a deeper access to her wet pussy. Kate felt a shiver as I slid my tongue over her love tunnel and settled my mouth completely on her pussy. My lips sucked her slit as I pushed my tongue inside her and immediately felt the barrier. Oh fucking hell! She's a virgin! Without pushing it further, I started stoking my tongue on the entrance of her hole, making her squirm and jerk on the bed. Then I lashed my tongue over her clit, feeling the erect little nub under my tongue. I picked up the pace and gave her hard licks before making small circles with my tongue and driving her out of this world. Again I swirled my tongue over her clit but this time, I closed my lips around it and sucked the little bead between my lips. And that did it! "Uhhhh...Yes!" she groaned. Her hips jerked in wild ecstasy as the electric jolts of her second orgasm passed through her body, filling my mouth with her warm tangy juices. I gently licked her clean and stood up. When I looked down at Kate, I saw the most breath-taking scene. From the messy net of her jet black hair, she smiled at me with a sparkle in her light brown eyes and a million dollar smile on her face. I dropped myself on the bed and pulled her up so that we rested our heads on the pillow on the centre of the bed. Lying on our back next to each other, we stared at the ceiling as Kate held my hand. My cock was as hard as I had ever felt and was dying to break free from my boxers. I turned on my left side to face her. I brushed the hair from her cheeks and leaned forward to kiss her again. When she parted her, I pushed my tongue in her mouth to give her a taste of her own pussy. Kate really surprised me when she sucked uncompromisingly on my tongue to drink the left over of her sweet nectar. "I can't believe that I tasted myself," she said when we broke the kiss. Before I could comment on her self-boosting remark, she pushed me on my back and climbed on to of me. "How come you have all the fun?" she grinned but didn't wait for an answer. She gave me another hot kiss before kissing her way down my neck. She gave me small pecks on my neck and occasional licked my warm skin with her tongue. She moved down to the lower part of my neck and then proceeded towards my left shoulder. As she licked the skin on my shoulder, I felt her teeth closing on my skin. "Ouch!" I shrieked when she bit me. "That's a love bite," she whispered as she continued her journey down my chest, all the while rubbing her pussy intentionally against my raging cock inside my boxers. She slipped put her tongue and circled it around my left nipple. Finally, she closed her lips on my nipple and sucked it hard for a while. Then she moved onto the other one before sliding down to my belly-button. Slipping out her tongue she circled it and licked it, causing me to squirm on the bed while her hands massaged my chest. God! She's playing the game on me. Without wasting any time, Kate tucked her fingers inside the waistband of my boxers to pull it down. I was so hard; she had to pull up the boxers above my cock before pulling them down and throwing them on the floor. My 7 inch cock was pointing straight at the ceiling. "Wow!" she exclaimed at the sight of my cock. Instead of touching it, Kate moved further down and kissed my inner thigh. She planted small kisses from the bottom to the top. I felt her hair touching my cock when she licked the upper area of my thigh. When she moved on to the other thigh, her cheek brushed my cock. I was getting used the small kisses on my inner thigh when they suddenly stopped. And all of a sudden, I felt Kate's tongue against the base of my cock. "Yes...I was waiting for that!" I encouraged her. She pressed it firmly and moved upward, licking the entire length of my shaft before stopping just below the head. Then she moved downwards in the same fashion until she reached the base. She repeated this up and down movement for a while until my patience was lost. "Suck it...damn it!" I insisted her as I raised my head to look down at her. She removed her tongue and grinned at me. "You were enjoying when you teased me and drove me crazy...and when I'm enjoying...you don't want to play the game. That's not fair, you jerk!" I knew it was useless to argue with her so I fell back on the bed and enjoyed the feeling of her tongue. Kate really didn't budge. She continued to tease me by licking my cock from the base to the top, just below the head. The only difference was that she was also massaging my thighs with her hands. Finally, when she moved her tongue upward, she dragged it all the way up to the head of my cock and moved it around for a while before giving it a firm lick. "That's it baby....suck it!" She kept flicking her tongue on the head of my throbbing cock, teasing the hell out of me. As if that was not enough, she moved her tongue back to the base and dragged upward but it was the slowest and firmest lick of the night. "Kate...please! I'm begging you...just do it...please..." And I think she was just waiting to hear me plead because when her tongue reached the tip of my cock, she closed her lips around it and sucked it gently. "Oh, yeah..." I groaned deeply. "Suck it...harder...uhhh...fuck!" The warmth of her mouth felt like heaven. After a while, she stopped sucking the head of my cock and moved her tongue all over it. After a few seconds, she stopped moving her tongue as well. But the head was still inside her mouth. I waited for a few seconds but she didn't do anything as if she was waiting for me to look at her or tell her something. And I was right! The moment I raised my head and looked at her, she did the most unbelievable thing I had seen. Our eyes remained locked with each other as Kate lowered her head on my cock. Without stopping at any point, she swallowed my throbbing cock as she tried to deep throat me. Her lips were wrapped tightly around my shaft as she moved down. "Fuck...you're the best!" I complimented at her, looking totally astounded by the view. I felt the tip of my cock touch the back of her throat as she swallowed me entirely, except for the last inch. But I still felt that she had done a great job. None of my previous girlfriends had gone past the upper half of my cock so it felt like an icing on the cake. I took slow deep breaths to prevent my cock from exploding in her mouth because I wanted more. Kate didn't move for a few seconds and I'm sure she must have felt my cock pulsating inside her mouth. Finally, she move upward and released my cock with a pop. "Did you like what I did?" she winked. "I loved what you did!" I corrected her. Kate raised her right hand from my thigh and wrapped it around the shaft, squeezing it gently while her left hand continued to massage my thigh. Starting slowly, she picked up the pace and stroked my cock along the length of my shaft. Her hand was sliding smoothly cause my cock was coated with my pre-cum and her saliva. I dropped back on the pillow and enjoyed the hand work. She started stroking my cock from the base to the centre for a few seconds before taking me in her mouth. But there was a hint of urgency as she bobbed her head up and down, alternating between gentle sucks and tongue licks while stroking it with her hand all the while. I closed my eyes as Kate gave me the best blowjob of my life. She continued her work on my cock for the next 2 minutes before I felt the tension growing in my loins. Suddenly, I realized that it was the first time Kate was giving me a blowjob and I didn't know if she would like me to cum inside her mouth. So I warned her. "Kate...I'm getting...close..." In her response, she started bobbing her head faster and sucked my cock harder than before and within seconds; I exploded inside her mouth, shooting 3 to 4 jets of hot semen in her warm orifice. I just had to see that amazing sight so I raised my head and looked at her. Kate surprised me by swallowing the entire load without letting a single drop to dribble out of her lips. She gave my cock a final squeeze to suck off the left over before releasing my cock to catch some air. I pulled her up and she moved over my body. I saw the satisfaction in her eyes as she looked at me. Then she leaned forward to kiss me. I was a bit hesitant because I had never allowed any girl to kiss me after she went down on me. But Kate was different. How could I disallow her? Kate immediately felt my reluctance so she forcefully parted my lips and pushed her tongue inside my mouth, making me taste my own cum. I had no choice but to kiss her back so I sucked on her tongue. The mixture of our saliva, Kate's pussy juices and my own cum was scrumptious, making it more erotic and hot as hell. Finally, breaking the kiss, she rolled off and fell on her back next to me. We stared at the ceiling as we caught our breaths. Kate turned her head and looked at me. "I love you, Chris," she whispered. "I love you too." We stayed there for a while. The room was completely quiet, except for the faded hum of the air conditioner. Neither of us said anything and yet it seemed that we spoke everything. I turned on my side to face Kate. Her eyes were wide open but she was lost in her thoughts. I brushed the hair from her cheek and broke her concentrated thoughts. She looked at me and smiled. "Can I ask you something?" I looked at her with a hint of hesitation on my face. "You can I ask me anything, Chris." I was thinking about the proper words to ask her but she seemed to have read my mind. "I'm still a virgin!" she proudly stated. "Why?" I shot back like an idiot. "I always wanted you to be the first guy I slept with." She was looking straight into my eyes as she continued, "I had dated only two guys in the college when I was a freshman. Actually I had no choice because if I hadn't dated them, everyone would have thought that I was not straight."