6 comments/ 99984 views/ 14 favorites CFNM Nude Day Party By: PositiveThinker Mark entertains the ladies on Nude Day with a surprise. Naked best friend has a Nude Day celebration surprise. My friend Mark invited me over to his house. He said he was having a party to celebrate National Nude Day. Of course, as a full fledged, proud member of the society of perverts, I'm intimately familiar with any holiday that had the word nude in it. Since there are none and since I've never heard of National Nude Day, I thought he was joking. He's always having a laugh at my expense, so I didn't think any more of it. I'd just have to think back to Prom night a decade ago when, rather than spending more for a limousine to drive us all home, a bunch of us stayed overnight in a hotel and partying. He woke me up yelling fire while beating a hubcap with a spoon. I was so tired and still a little drunk. It was six in the morning. He knew that I slept in the nude and as soon as I ran out of the room, they closed and locked the door behind me leaving me out in the corridor naked. Okay, I was embarrassed being out in the hall of a hotel naked, but it did give me reason to expose myself to the women walking by my room on their way down to breakfast or to check out. Once my friends saw that I enjoyed being left outside the door naked a bit too much, they allowed me back in the room. Still, over the years, I've been the butt of all his practical jokes. It's a good thing I have a good sense of humor. So, other then him joking that he was celebrating National Nude Day, which I figured there was no such holiday, he didn't say what the occasion was, but with single guys we don't need an occasion to party. All we need are alcohol and women. 'Yeah, baby!' Since, I had no plans; I was looking forward to having a few beers and hooking up with a hot chick. There are always hot chicks at Mark's parties. Only, I get so drunk at his parties, too drunk; that I don't know where I am; especially when I fail to hook up with a hot chick, but man do I have a good time. 'Let's party!' Hmm, now that I think about it, I wonder if the reason why I don't hook up with a hot chick is because I drink too much and get too drunk. 'Nah.' Mark is the type of guy who is always surrounded by hot women. He's a good looking guy, that is, if you like the tall, blonde with blue eyes, and leanly muscular sort of man. Instead of the more realistic kind of guy who has a bread and beer belly and a butter and bacon butt. I'm Average Joe, that's me, short, a bit overweight, and average in every way. Actually, as friends, best friends, we have little in common, other than we love women and love to party. Had we not lived next door and grown up together as kids, Mark would otherwise have nothing to do with me. 'Nah, that's ridiculous. The guy loves me.' With that said, notwithstanding our lack of commonality, we do everything together. We are practically brothers, twins, so long as you broaden the definition of twins to how Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger looked when appearing in the movie, Twins. Mark has a good job during the day; he's some kind of software engineer. He works crazy hours and then has a bunch of days off. His work is tied to some specific and special, high priority projects and, when his company completes one project, they reward their staff by giving them some much needed time off before starting the next project. Since I work there too, he got me a job in the maintenance department, whenever we're together we never talk about work. As well as it should be, our talks always center on women, which explains why I really don't know exactly what he does to make a living. All I know is that he's a hotshot there, as he is around here, especially when it comes to women. He has enough clout at work to get me the same days off that he has, so that we can party together. 'I love this guy. I really do.' I arrived at his condo early. He said he needed some help setting up refreshments, which meant, he'd give me money to go to the supermarket and the liquor store to buy whatever I thought he needed. He was never any good with shopping for groceries and liquor, and figuring out how much food and booze he needed to entertain people. If I left it up to Mark to buy refreshments, he'd return home with beer and chips, which is okay by me, but the women prefer wine coolers and a bit more to eat, foods that are less fattening. Generally, we take turns entertaining and it was my turn to entertain, something that I always look forward to doing, because I love people. Okay, actually I just love women, especially good looking women with hot bodies. To be honest, the reason why I prefer entertaining Mark and his hot women at my apartment is because I usually end up with a topless and drunken chick in a thong to spend the night with me. "You! Where's Mark? How did I get here? Where are my clothes? Did you? Did I? Did we...?" "It's just me, Joe. Mark's not here. I drove you. There are your clothes. Yes. Yes. Yes. You have a little bit of my dried cum on your lip and in your hair." "Eww! Call me a cab." Yeah, typically that's the downside of a drunken woman waking up in bed with me after becoming consciously sober enough to know that I'm not who she thought I was. The upside is, of course, when she thought she was in bed with Mark, all I'd have to do is whisper in her ear, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want you to have my baby." Then, she was my sexy, do anything bitch. 'Yeah, suck it baby, suck it. Now, swallow.' Only, for some unknown reason, he insisted that he wanted to host this party. He said that this party was a special party and that he and I would be the only guys there with a dozen women. Certainly, not typical of our other parties, but with a women to men ratio of six to one, this was my kind of party. 'I was getting laid tonight. Yeah, Baby!' Did you guys ever read The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald? Well, if you had and if you knew my friend Mark and I, then you'd know that he was Jay Gatsby and I was Nick Carraway. It's not that Mark was as rich as Gatsby was portrayed to be in the book, although he certainly does make much more money as a software engineer than I do as a janitor. It's just that he always had a new, hot car, a red Corvette convertible, which is what he drives now and he always had a different, hot blonde, shapely brunette or beautiful redhead on his arm. And he has the annoying, albeit endearing, habit of calling me 'Sport', which is what Jay Gatsby called Nick Carraway. 'Sport,' unless he read The Great Gatsby or, knowing Mark, he just watched the movie, where he came up with that name, since I don't play sports nor am I even a good sport, I'll never know. Actually, he does resemble a youngish Robert Redford, who played the part of Jay Gatsby in the movie. I could have asked him where he got the name, but I kind of like being called 'Sport'. It makes me feel special enough to him that he made up a nickname just for me. So long as it wasn't an insulting and/or degrading nickname, I can live with him calling me 'Sport.' It's better than being called Fat Ass and Lard Belly, which is what they called me in high school. Now that I think about it, I've always been in Mark's shadow. He was the star quarterback on our high school football team and I was the equipment manager, actually, the water and towel boy. After our team had a winning season and won our version of the Super Bowl, I watched while they carried him around on their shoulders after he threw the winning touchdown. Man, the cheerleaders were all over his hot body grabbing him and kissing him. I don't know where the guy found the control to resist them; some of them were really hot. Yet, he did and that made them want him even more. During baseball season, he was the star pitcher and I was the equipment manager, actually, the bat boy. Again, I watched after they carried him around on their shoulders after having a winning season, striking out the side, and winning the championship. We didn't have cheerleaders in baseball, but we had some MILFS, mothers of some of the guys that I would have loved to fuck who were on the team that were always making passes at Mark. Some of the MILFS road with us on the bus as chaperones and they practically threw themselves at Mark. Grabbing him, hugging him, and even kissing him on the pretense that he was the hero who won the championship game. While their sons road in the front of the bus, their hot moms gave Mark plenty of up skirt and down blouse views of their hot bodies in the back of the bus. It was an embarrassing display to see, but I watched anyway and jerked off over it later. Again, I don't know where the guy found the control to resist them; some of them were really hot. Yet, he did and that made them want him even more. Our life paralleled those roads with him taking the high road and I taking the low road, that is, until he left for college and I served in the Army. Then, having lost much of my excess weight in basic training, I was finally somebody, kind of, well, not really, okay, not at all, if you want to call Private Screw Up somebody. Now, we're just a couple of old friends hanging out together and having a good time. I'm not a picky guy and would be happy to take any one of Mark's leftover or rejected women as my fuck buddy, girlfriend or even wife. One is more gorgeous than the next but, seriously, none of the women he dates are interested in dating me. If they were interested in me at all, if they took the time to talk to me, they were only interested in befriending me, as did Daisy Buchanan in The Great Gatsby book and played by Mia Farrow in the subsequent movie, to hopefully learn how to win Mark's heart. I was their go to guy fielding all the questions with answers about Mark. They all were as transparent in their reasons to bother with me, as the see-through blouses and dresses they wore when they walked out in the bright sunlight. Sorry, to allow my sexual perversions to get in the way of this story, but voyeuristic opportunities, along with my perverted imagination, when spying on these hot women, are sometimes all that I have. "Eww! Mark, your friend keeps leering at me." "He's harmless, Samantha. He's just drunk, horny, and perverted." Only, no one can get to this guy. When it comes to love and emotions, he must have ice water running through his veins to have rejected some of the beauties he has rejected. With all the beautiful women he has at his feet, and he has had some tens, it's difficult for me to understand that there isn't one who turns his head enough for him to even consider getting down on his knee to ask her to marry him. Apparently, by the tell-all sexual conversations we have after he's been intimate with someone, he's only interested in having a good time and getting laid or a blowjob. As am I, he's especially fond of blowjobs, and as more than anything else, he loves having his cock sucked. Other than getting a hand job or a blowjob, nothing else really matters to him. Marriage, as well as pregnancy, long-term relationships, and commitment are dirty words to him, the eternally confirmed bachelor, and send him running away. I showed up at Mark's place and he greeted me at the door naked. I couldn't believe he was naked. He shocked me and even with his nakedness, I didn't put that together with him celebrating National Nude Day. I had already discounted that holiday, actually forgotten about it, figuring that he had been joking about National Nude Day. When he opened the door naked, I just figured he was running late, which he's always late for everything. Besides, seeing him naked removed whatever thoughts I had in my mini mind. An involuntary reaction, I couldn't believe it when I looked down to check out his package. Suddenly, I felt gay in not being able to stop the impulse to look again and again. 'Wow!' I was surprised that he was naked, but not really. I saw him plenty of times without his shirt and just a pair of boxer shorts while he ran around trying to hurry to get ready. Yet, in all the years I've known him, I don't ever remember seeing Mark naked. This was my first time seeing his, you know, thing. I saw his buff body at the beach lots of times and he's the type of guy that when sitting next to you on the sand, you'd leave on your t-shirt. Yeah, he looked that good that he'd make you look that bad. Actually, I look bad enough on my own that I don't need help from anyone else to make me look bad. He also has no concept of time. He's the type of guy who'd be late for his own funeral. With all the face creams for his skin and gels he uses for his hair, he's worse than a woman in the time he takes primping in front of the mirror to get ready. Me? I'm out the door in two minutes. I just get up and brush my teeth, most times. Sometimes I shower, sometimes I don't, and sometimes I shave, sometimes I don't. Remembering to turn my sweatshirt inside out, the clean side, ala Maynard G. Krebs on Dobie Gillis, I put the same clothes on from the night before and I'm good to go. Ah, gees, now that I think of it, do you remember Tuesday Weld? She played Thalia Menninger, Dobie's love interest. Her soft voice was so sexy. Blonde, beautiful, and seductively built, she was so hot. This is what it's like with Mark. He gets all the women who look like Thalia Menniger and I get all the short, fat, and homely Zelda Gilroy's of the world. I really didn't want to be caught staring at his cock, so I maintained constant eye contact and when he turned away, I gave his package another peek. 'Double wow! Holy shit. He's huge.' Now, I know it's not just his hot wheel car that gets the chicks. If I was built like him, I'd be gunning for Jenny McCarthy or Pamela Anderson or Cameron Diaz, they are all still so hot. Pamela Anderson is my fantasy bitch. I heard she likes big cocks, as her first husband, Tommy Lee, was hung like my friend Mark. "Hey, how you doin', Mark?" "I'm well, Joey. And you?" Yeah, I know, sometimes, I'm embarrassed for Mark, as he doesn't speak the correct English. Instead of saying that he's good, he says that he's well. No one answers a question about their health in that way, they always reply, "I'm good." Every time he says that he's well, I think of well water. Feeling a bit homophobic, I didn't want to get too close to him, incase he accidentally poked me with his penis or worse, if my hand accidentally brushed by and touched his cock. Eww! If something like that happened, him poking me with his penis, I'd think he was gay or worse, and if my hand brushed by his cock and I touched it, he'd think that I was gay. Gross! Not that there's anything wrong with being gay and taking a cock up the ass or in the mouth, if you're a gay guy, it's just not me. I like tits and pussies. Certainly, I love asses, but only women's asses. "I'm good," I said not wanting to correct his English but emphasizing the word 'good' while hoping he'd take the hint the next time he answered when someone asked him how he was and he said good instead of well, but he never did. "Actually, I'm hot" I said. "It's going to be another hot one today, which would make this an official heat wave, three consecutive days of plus ninety degree heat." "Yeah, well, I plan on kicking up the heat with the party that I have planned." "Oh, yeah?" "I see you're wearing your party clothes," he said giving me a smile. "Yeah, I bought a new shirt for the occasion. The big flower pattern makes me look slimmer," I said turning from side to side and looking down and pulling at my shirt to show him how roomy it is. "My old shirt no longer stretched across my belly for me to button it. I figured that either I have to cutback on beer, fat, and carbs and exercise or buy bigger clothes. A no brainer, it was easier just to buy bigger clothes." "Good decision, Joey," he said laughing. See, my English lessons are working. He said good decision instead of well decision. "I see you're wearing your party clothes, Mark," I said looking down at his exposed penis, again. What the Hell is wrong with me? That's the fifth time I looked at his cock. Gees, why do I keep looking at his cock? Fuck, I hope I don't have gay tendencies. Suddenly, with him hanging around me naked, I could feel myself turning gay. Next I'll be buying ferns and flowers at the nursery instead of buying tools at Home Depot. "You like?" Suddenly, he made me feel uncomfortable by expecting me to not only look at his hot, naked body but also to give him my opinion on his hot, naked body. "Damn, I wish I had your body," I said looking down at his cock again. Did I just say that out loud? I can't believe I said that and I can't believe I looked at his cock again. Just as I said that, my conscience gave me a warning for some inexplicable reason. Something my mother always said, 'Be careful what you wish for' suddenly stormed through my mind along with my stomach in my mouth after throwing up a little in my mouth. It was then that I had a foreboding feeling of doom. Only, I didn't know what it all meant. He handed me three, crisp, one hundred dollar bills. "I know I'm a pain in the ass, Sport, but would you mind? I'm running a little late." Running a little late? He's not even dressed. At this point, he'll never be ready. I hate just hanging around his condo waiting for him. Although, him never being ready always gave me a reason to have a beer while watching sports on his big screen TV. "Sure, no problem, Mark," I said pocketing the money. I wanted to ask him if I could take his car, but decided against doing that. It was enough that he never asked me how much I spent and never asked for the change, allowing me to pocket whatever I didn't spend. Besides, I'd be afraid to drive his Corvette after being used to tooling around in my '95 Honda Civic. He was fanatical about his cars and he's had some hot cars, an Acura NSX, a Viper, a BMW M3, a Shelby Cobra, and a Porsche Boxster. None of them ever looked dirty. He was always paying someone to detail them. I think I washed my Honda in 2007. By the grin on his face, every time he drives it, I think he likes the 'Vette the best. It suits him. "I love entertaining, but I hate going to the supermarket," he confessed with an uncomfortable grin. "Why?" If I looked as good as he did, tall, muscular, and handsome, I'd live in the supermarket picking up woman and defrosting them by the frozen food section while warming their buns with my hands. I'd heat them up by the deli meat section and make them hot by stroking a long, hard salami, while hoping that they'd stroke my hotdog later. I'd be sickening sweet in the candy section asking them if I could lick chocolate syrup and eat cherries off their hot body, in the hopes that they'd do the same to mine. I'd exchanged innuendoes in the produce section while feeling a cantaloupe in the fruit section and fondling a massive cucumber in vegetable section. Yeah, my Mom always told me to eat my fruits and vegetables, but you know me, I always play with my food. Then, when we're done eating, I'd promise to wash their dirty bodies in the household goods section while standing next to the Mr. Clean and holding a big bar of Ivory soap. You know what I mean. You get the idea. "The women at the market creep me out," he said jolting me out of my supermarket fantasy. "They think just because I'm there in the same aisle with them that they can invade my sense of space. Their stares and their leers make me uncomfortable. They make me feel like a piece of meat and I feel so used and abused." When he said that, I wondered if the women, who I invaded their space and stared and leered at, felt as violated as Mark confessed he did. 'Nah!' Piece of meat? Used and abused? So? I don't believe this guy. I wonder where he shops for groceries. He says that like that's a problem and like there's something wrong with feeling like a piece of meat and feeling used and abused by women. This guy must get so much pussy that he's never been horny and lonely, while watching late night porn movies with his hand stroking his own cock. Sorry, that's way too much personal information. CFNM Nude Day Party Just once, I'd love to feel like a piece of beefsteak. Just once, I'd love for women to invade my personal space, if you know what I mean. Women can use and abuse this out of shape body any time they want. Sure, I've had plenty of women stare at me, but not with desire. Whenever women stare at me, they stare at me with that 'What the fuck' look. Other than cops and the boyfriends of girlfriends and husbands of wives that I've offended by ogling them, I've never had anyone leer at me. Certainly, I've never had anyone leer at me with an 'I want you' kind of look. When he said that about women making him uncomfortable when leering at him, he made me feel like the proud pervert that I am because that's how I stare when leering at women. He's such a lucky bastard. 'Yeah!' I always stare and leer at women while shopping in the supermarket. What else am I supposed to do when in such close proximity to women other than to invade their space by squeezing by their cart in a crowded aisle? "Pardon me. Sorry, I didn't mean to feel, I mean, touch your round firm buttocks." "Pervert." "Pardon me. Sorry, I didn't mean to feel, I mean, touch your magnificent breast." "Pervert." Yeah, I love shopping at the supermarket. Besides, I can't tell you how many down blouses I've seen at the dairy food aisle alone with women bending over while wearing loose, skimpy tops, tops that fall open as soon as they lean forward. Then, whenever not wearing bras, I love it when they wear sheer tops that show their nipples once the cool chill of the freezer section makes them pop out and make an appearance. Yeah, I love it when the high beams are flashing me while I'm quickly approaching. 'Hey, Baby, are you cold or just happy to see me?' I mean, I'd never say that to a stranger, but I'm free to think that. This is a free country and they can't do anything to me for thinking dirty thoughts. Suddenly, I remembered the last woman who caught me leering down her open blouse. "Pervert!" 'Thank you,' I wanted to say, but I didn't want to push her buttons and push my luck. It's always better to act like I wasn't guilty of stealing a lurid look. "Moi? I can assure you, madam, that I was more interested in the expiration date on the eggs than I was with your fabulous melons. I mean, I wasn't looking down your blouse." "Get away from me, fucktard, before I call the manager." Just as exciting as they are exhausting, my supermarket excursions take hours. The supermarket is my toy store, my eye candy store. Every time I go to the market, I see at least one up skirt in the household goods aisle or the gourmet food aisle with women squatting down in short skirts to read the labels. I always hit those aisles a few times. I don't want to miss anything. "Please call the manager? There's a guy hanging around the International Foods aisle pretending to tie his shoes while trying to look up women's skirts." "Why do you think he's pretending to tie his shoes and looking up women's skirts?" "Because he's not wearing shoes with laces, he's wearing loafers." Because of that bitchy broad, I'm banned for life from the Pay-Less and Buy-More food store chain and now must shop at the Pay-More and Buy-Less food store chain, instead. Even though I sometimes feel that Mark uses me and takes advantage of our friendship, I don't mind picking up the food and booze for his parties. Our friendship is a two-way street with plenty of trashcans along the side of the road. (I don't know what that means, but I thought it sounded good when I wrote it.) Besides, it always made me feel like a big shot handing the clerk a C-note for my purchases. I imagined everyone staring at me when the cashier holds it up to the light before taking out her black pen to mark my money making sure that it's good and not counterfeit. "So," I said breaking my visualization of my trip to the grocery store in anticipation of the real trip. "What do you want the usual?" "Yeah, Joey, but this time, only buy food that won't go bad if they get left out in the heat." "Okay, sure. I won't buy shrimp this time. That was nasty when that hot chick puked all over the rug." "Yeah, now that I think of it, Joey, whatever happened to Sheila? I haven't seen her since that night." "Sheila? Was that her name? It beats the shit out of me, Mark. Uhm, I don't know," I said looking down and avoiding his stare. Suddenly, Sheila's long auburn hair, strikingly beautiful face, and shapely naked body with her boobs bouncing up and down and side to side refilled my mind with lust and desire. She's was stunningly beautiful and I did everything to her. For a drunken broad on the verge of puking, she gave me the best damn blowjob that I ever had in my life. Yeah, sure, I had to prop up her semi-conscious, naked body most of the time, but she was worth the physical effort for the sexual gratification. "Didn't you give her a ride home?" "A ride home? Me? What was her name again?" "Sheila." "Oh, yeah, I remember now, that's right; I did drive her but—" "Or did you just drive her to your place, strip her naked, and fuck her while pretending that you were me?" "Well, you know, it was late and she was too drunk to give me directions to her place," I said avoiding eye contact. "She was a wild bitch, though," I said. "Man, she was so hot. She was so drunk. Why you ever dumped her is beyond me." "You whispered in her ear that you loved her while she thought you were me to get her to blow you, didn't you?" "Well, yeah, kind of." "You told her that you loved her, didn't you?" "I may have said that in the throws of passion." "You told her that you wanted to marry her and wanted her to have your baby." "I may have said that, too. I could have said that. She was so damn beautiful and her body was so damn hot. I don't remember." "She was so drunk that she thought you were me and you pretended to be me, didn't you?" "Okay, okay, enough. I'm a degenerate pervert. Taking advantage of drunken women is the only way I'll get to experience a hot woman." We've been friends too long that this guy knows me too well. Still, what did he expect I'd do with the opportunity to be alone with one of his hot rejects that was falling down drunk? She was the best looking woman and the best piece of ass that I ever had unconscious, one-sided sex with. She was so drunk and it was so hot to feel her through her clothes while kissing her before slowly undressing her that I just had to have her. I could have been Brad Pitt or the Hunchback of Notre Dame for all she knew and for that one night it was so hot and so much fun to imagine that we were a couple. "Don't you feel bad that you took advantage of a drunken woman and had sex with her under false pretenses?" "Hey, we all want to ride the fantasy train once in a while and it worked for a little while when pretending that I was you. Besides, it was her fault that she can't hold her liquor and it was her fault that she thought that I was you." "Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Sport, but there won't be any of that at this party. Oh, no. The guests at this party are all my closest friends and family. I can assure you that this party may be the dullest party you've ever attended here." That was my clue when he said that there won't be any of that at this party. I should have remembered what he had said, that this party may be the dullest party you've ever attended here. Only, once the guests arrived and after having several beers, I thought otherwise. I'm such a fool when I drink. I was gone a couple hours buying groceries and booze and when I returned Mark was still naked. "What'd you just get out of the shower?" "No, I took one already earlier this morning." "Then, why are you still naked? Aren't you getting dressed? People will be arriving soon." "I am dressed," he said looking down at himself and then looking up at me with a deviant smile. I looked at him, as if he was kidding. He was always kidding. Only, this time, I couldn't tell if he was serious or kidding and I couldn't help but look at his member. If I had a cock as big as his, I'd be partying naked, too. If I looked as good naked as he did, I'd be a member to every place where there were available women. I'd be prancing around every nude beach. I'd wear the tightest shorts with no underwear to show off what I had. Only, he never does any of that, that is, until now. "What do you mean? You're naked," I said looking down at his penis again. He caught me looking this time and I felt so gay, but his cock was so big and I couldn't help looking. I've never seen a cock that big on a white man. His cock mesmerized me. Suddenly, I wondered how the women reacted when they saw his anaconda. I wondered if it frightened them or delighted them. I wondered how they could fit that thing in their mouth without gagging. "Don't you know what today is?" He laughed and whenever his laugh was directed at me, he made me feel stupid. What else is new? He was always making me feel dumb, but in my lack of sophistication, I learned a lot just by hanging around him. He taught me stuff I never knew existed, good stuff, about G spots, how to make love to a woman, and how it's better to give pleasure to a woman than to receive pleasure from a woman. Okay, maybe not everything he taught me was useful; especially how it's better to give than to receive. I still believe that charity starts at home with a blowjob. "Today? Yeah, sure, today is Tuesday, July 14th," I said not getting the joke, if there was one to get. "And?" "And what?" "Today is National Nude Day," he said with a victorious smile waiting for me to get it. "It is?" "Yeah, it is. I told you that on the phone. I told you that I was celebrating National Nude Day," he said showing me his bright whites while making me wish my teeth were as white and my penis was as big as his. Why do some guys get everything and other guys, well, look like me? Just once, I'd love to know what it'd be like to be him. Just once I'd love to have a woman at my feet that hadn't fallen down drunk and was nearly unconscious. "I thought you were kidding," I said looking at him to see if he was pulling my leg. "What's National Nude Day?" I scratched my head. "Is that a real holiday or a made up holiday to sell fanny packs to hold your car keys while you parade around naked?" He threw a big arm around my soft shoulders and gave me a squeeze. "You know, if you want to strip off those clothes, you can. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. We're all the same in the eyes of God." Bullshit! We look the same my ass. If I looked as good as he does naked, I could be as magnanimous, solicitous, patronizing, and proud as he is to say that we are the same while maintaining a straight face. How dare he? Gees, I hate it when he mixes metaphors with religion when talking about being naked with the underlying thoughts of sex. Besides, God isn't here to give his opinion of my fat, flabby body. People are, namely, women will be here who will surely compare my fat, flabby body, saggy naked ass, and miniscule penis to Mark's muscular body, tight buns, and huge cock. Not to mention, it was gay enough to have Mark standing in the same room with me naked. It'd be really gay for us to both be in the same room naked. Don't you think? People would talk. "Nah, I'm good," I said looking down at myself. "I'm, uhm, wearing cotton. It breathes," I said reaching down and pulling the underwear from out of my butt crack. "I'm comfortable." "You're funny, Joe. Well, I prefer skin to cotton any day," he said looking down at himself and flashing me a Tom Cruise smile with his hands out by his sides. Damn! If I were a woman right now, he'd melt me. I could imagine me responding to his smile with, 'You got me with hello.' Oh, God, now I'm quoting Renee Zellweger as Dorothy Boyd in Jerry Maguire with Tom Cruise. Perish the thought, that's so gay for me to say. I couldn't believe he was making me hot and horny by parading his naked body around in front of me. His cock was so friggin' big and I couldn't stop looking at. Every time he moved, it moved back and forth and side to side. It was alive. I swear the thing cast a shadow. Just then, the doorbell rang and three tall, shapely lovelies, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead dressed in pastel sundresses improved my mood. Suddenly, I was embarrassed for Mark when I realized that he was still naked and opening his door and greeting his guests that way. Yet, my embarrassment was short lived when the women all greeted him with a giggle, a kiss on the lips, and a quick stroke of his cock, as if they were shaking his hand. Man, this guy is amazing. He must have had sex with these three already. If I stood there without wearing any clothes, they'd be dialing 911 right now and I'd be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior. Besides money, good looks, a great job, a hot body, a huge cock, this beautiful condo, and a red Corvette convertible, what does he have that I don't? If you take all that away, you'd have...me. Okay, never mind. The doorbell rang again and it was Mark's Mom Audrey, his sister Irene, and his Aunt Helen. I turned the shade of red that Mark should have but didn't when he opened the door. I couldn't believe he was standing there in his birthday suit not only in front of his Mom but also in front of his sister and aunt. This guy is brazen. This guy is depraved. This guy is my hero. Suddenly, I envisioned Mariah Carey singing Hero. I really felt gay, then. "Hi, Mom. Hi sis," he said giving each one a peck on the lips. "I haven't seen this since I changed your diaper," said his Mom wrapping her hand around his cock and giving it a playful tug. Oh, my God. No way. I couldn't believe his mother just grabbed his cock. That's so outrageous to see his Mom wrap her hand around her son's cock and give it a pull. "This brings back memories of when we used to play doctor and I was the nurse and you'd say open your mouth and say, Ahhh," said his sister doing the same as did his mother. She wrapped her hand around his cock and gave it a slow stroke. Are you kidding me? His sister just grabbed his cock, too. Suddenly, I had thoughts of Mark's sister playing doctor and on her knees in front of her brother saying, Ahhh, before he filled her mouth with his cock. Suddenly, I had thoughts of my mom and sister grabbing my cock. Only, that image quickly faded when I compared my mom and sister to his MILF of a mom and hot sister. "How are you Aunt Helen?" Mark turned to his aunt and gave her a hug while pressing his naked penis against her crotch. "It's so nice of you to come." I couldn't remove my eyes from the public display of his incestuous nudity with his relatives groping his cock. I'll tell you right now. I've always fantasized about my Aunt Susan and if I greeted her at the door naked and hugged her in the way that Mark just hugged his Aunt Helen with his cock pressed against her crotch and her big tits squished against his naked chest, I'd be cumming all over her instead of thanking her for coming. "Well, it's good to see you, too, Mark," she said with a giggle while looking down at his package. "My, my, how we have grown," she said with a sexy laugh. "That wasn't there when I changed your diaper," she said still staring at it and reaching down and giving it a touch before wrapping her hand around it, giving his cock a squeeze, and giving him a peck on the lips. Either this family is into incest or they are close, really close. This was bizarre. This is surreal. Never have I seen anything like this before. Someone pinch me. I can't believe this is happening. My cock was throbbing and I was getting horny after watching three women and Mark's family handling his package. Again, the doorbell rang and a group of six women, Mark's co-workers, with one hotter than the next, filed in the condo giving Mark a peck on the lips and a stroke of his cock. I've seen them all at work, but not without their lab coats. They were all dressed to the nines and looked really hot. I reopened the front door to see if there was a sign. 'Naked man inside, kiss him on the lips and stroke his cock for admission to the party,' but there was no such sign. None of the six women were offended that Mark was naked. Conversely, they were delighted. Every one of them went right for his cock in the way that I'd be making the move for their tits. He must have had sex with all of them, too. Mark spent the evening entertaining his guests naked. He even accidentally, no doubt, poked me in the ass with his cock a couple of times when I was reaching up to get something and he was trying to squeeze by me. And once, my hand brushed by his cock, too. After a while, I forgot that he was naked, but the women never did. They were always groping him and touching his exposed cock, as if it was a pull toy or a worry stone. A couple of times, he started getting hard and I couldn't believe how much bigger he got. Now, I was curious how big he'd be fully erect. The fact that I was so enamored with his organ made me wonder if I was turning gay. Much in the way of Curly Joe needing Camembert cheese, I needed some tits to feel, squeeze and suck to reinforce that I was still the perverted man that I am. Finally, after all the guests were comfortably working on their second or third drink, Mark took center stage. "As you all know, I invited you here for a few reasons. First of all, today is National Nude Day, which, incase you haven't noticed, is why I'm naked." Everyone laughed and one of the women threw her panties at him. "Thank you," he said catching her panties and sniffing them. "Suddenly, I feel like Tom Jones," he laughed. "I've never been comfortable with public nudity, but I promised to fill in for a friend as a nude dancer while he's on vacation next month." "Well, since it is National Nude Day, I don't think you should be the only one naked, Mark," said his aunt, removing her blouse and quickly removing her bra. Be still my heart. Oh, my God. To see his aunt's big hooters was a dream come true. Yeah, sure, she's a lot older than I am, but tits are tits and she has big ones. Besides, what is it with tits on an old broad? Except for them sagging a little, tits never age. They still look suckably good. Moreover, the fact that she was exposing her boobs to her nephew while he was flashing his cock was even more wildly and incestuously exciting. To my voyeuristic benefit, but to my detrimental need to join in on the fun, the women totally ignored me acting as if I wasn't even there. Then, in the name of National Nude Day, when his sister and mother followed suit by removing their blouses and removing their bras, I thought I'd die of a heart attack. I've known Mark's mom and sister as long as I known Mark and I fantasized about doing his hot sister for years, and now here she is not six feet away from me nearly naked. Then, when I checked out Mommy, I could see where Mark's sister, Irene, got her hot body. Mark's mom, Audrey, had the same body except that her tits were a wee bit bigger and sagged a bit more than her daughter's tits. Now, with three topless women, this National Nude Day party was shaping up to be the hottest party ever. I quickly turned to the blonde, brunette, and redhead in time to watch them strip out of their sundresses. Damn, they all had hot bodies. All they were wearing now were just thongs. It was the six co-workers turn and none of them disappointed me. They all stripped off their clothes, too. Pants, tops, bras, and panties, everything was removed. Now, this was a party. I didn't know where to look first. My head turned left to right and back again like a ball in a pinball machine looking from Mark's topless relatives to his nearly naked friends to his naked co-workers. Twelve naked and semi-naked women, 24 tits, 6 naked pussies and 3 thong clad asses. The only women still wearing pants were his Mom, his aunt, and his sister. CFNM Nude Day Party Just then, the music started playing and Mark started dancing, as if he was a male stripper, only he was already naked. Hypnotized by the movement of it and mesmerized by the sight of it, there was something erotic about watching his cock bob up and down and back and forth while he danced and I couldn't take my eyes off of it. Moreover, the women couldn't keep their hands off of it and off of him. Figuring, no doubt, that this was what was in store for him when he filled in as a male stripper for his friend, who was going on vacation next month; they all were kissing him, French kissing him. Even his Mom, sister, and aunt got in the action and got up to dance with him while pressing their tits against his chest and their pelvis against his cock while grabbing his ass and stroking his cock. I couldn't believe that Mark was making out with his mother, sister, and aunt while they felt his hot body. Everyone groped him whenever he neared them. Then, the blonde, brunette, and redhead took the lead by taking him in their mouths. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was so hot to watch them suck his cock. Each one of them gave him a mini blowjob and that was so exciting to watch. Then the three of them knelt in front of him taking turns putting his cock in their mouths. I couldn't believe it when his mother, sister, and aunt knelt in front of him and did the same thing. Each one took his cock in hand and stroked him while looking up at him before taking his cock in their mouths. First it was his mother, then his sister, and then his aunt giving him a mini blowjob. I almost came off in my underwear watching his mother suck her son's cock, his sister take him in her mouth, and his aunt remove her teeth to give her nephew a gum job. Are you kidding me? This just isn't happening. No way, I couldn't believe it when all of his six co-workers joined in the action by rubbing his balls, as they all took turns kneeling before him to take his cock in their mouths while he reached down and felt their tits. Now, he was erect and he was huge. Maybe it was a combination of the loud music and the free flowing alcohol, but the women were all in feverish frenzy and hot with desire for Mark's cock. He was covered by women groping him, stroking him, touching him, feeling him, and sucking on him. Mark was getting in the action, too, by feeling their bodies, squeezing their asses, grabbing at their tits and sliding his hand between their legs. I couldn't believe he was inappropriately touching his mother, sister, and aunt in the way that he touched all the other women. Incestuously erotic, it was disturbingly exciting to watch him molest his mother, sister, and aunt by sucking their tits and allowing them to grope his big prick. The three women knelt before him again taking turns with his cock. I watched his mother blow him and then his sister and then his aunt. Oh, my God, I was so turned on watching their display of passion. I wanted to be part of the fun, too. Wanting more excitement than what just the voyeurism afforded me, the last one dressed, I felt insanely out of place. I already had an erection. I could feel it throbbing against my underwear. I wanted them to touch me, feel me, stroke me, and to suck me, too. I wanted Mark's sister to kneel in front of me, take my cock in her hand and stroke me while looking up at me, before taking my cock in her mouth. Yeah, sure, I wasn't as good looking as he was and didn't have the hot body that he had, but I had a cock, too, albeit not nearly as big as his. Still, I was jealous of the attention he was receiving. Quickly I stripped out of my clothes and jumped up in front where Mark was standing hoping that the women would direct their attention to me instead of him. "Happy Nude Day!" Unfortunately, I haven't seen Mark since that party. Fortunately, I was lucky I wasn't arrested. They said they took his Mom away by ambulance after she complained of chest pains and his sister left a scar on my cheek where her diamond ring cut me when she slapped me for trying to strip off her clothes. To still remain friends with Mark, I had to promise him that I'd get help for my drinking problem and faithfully attend AA meetings. It turns out that he had asked his mom, sister, aunt and nine of his closest friends, all women, to the party to tell them that...he was gay. What? Gay? Mark gay? I couldn't believe it. Mark isn't gay? This is another one of his jokes. How could he be gay? He's with a different woman every week. Then, again, that may explain why he rejected all these beautiful women, never asking any of them to marry him, and never even becoming serious with any of them. I must have gone into shock when he told everyone he was gay and I heard him utter the gay word. It was then that I started drinking more than even I usually drink. I fell asleep on his couch and must have dreamt that all of this really happened. My dream was so real that it made me want to strip off my clothes to join in the fun, only I was the only one naked and the joke was on me. During that whole time that I had imagined Mark naked, I was totally drunk and he was fully dressed. Now, in hindsight, thinking about Mark naked, imagining his big cock, made me wonder if I was gay, too. I could be gay. I don't have a steady girlfriend and have never been in a serious relationship. How would I know if I'm gay or just totally unattractive to women? Surely, when I look in the mirror I don't see what they see. Yeah, sure, I'm short and fat, but I'm a good guy, an average sort of guy, average Joe, that's me. Only, women don't want Average Joe. They want gay Mark. Now on the wagon, I haven't had any delusions since I stopped drinking. Still, I could have sworn Mark was naked. I could have sworn all the women were naked, too. I could have sworn all the women were all over his hot, naked body. I still can't believe I stuck my cock in his aunt's mouth and put my hand behind her head while fucking her mouth with my hand down her blouse and bra and fondling her nipple. I'm such a drunken degenerate. Every cloud has a silver lining and we have a date this Saturday, Mark's aunt and I. Yeah, she's 60-years-old. So what? What's the big deal? I haven't seen them yet, but by the side profile her breasts make in her clothes, she's got huge tits. And you can't tell me she didn't enjoy sucking my cock, otherwise she wouldn't have made a date with me. Then, out of the blue, I was shocked when I received a phone call from Mark asking me out on a date. Now that he's out of the closet, he wants to explore a relationship with me. Apparently, he's been in love with my fat ass for years. I don't know. I could do worse. He said I wouldn't have to work anymore, just take care of him and his condo. He likes my cooking. He does make a good living, drives a nice car, and I do look good in pastel colors. Without question, he is a good catch. I've never been intimate with a man. I've only had sex with women. Now, that I think more about it, there was that time in the Army...don't ask, don't tell. And there was another time when I was in jail, but I was in jail for such a very long time...30 days. Then, I remembered wishing I had Mark's body and warning myself to be careful for what I wish for because now I do have his body, so to speak. Only, I didn't mean that I wished that I had Mark's body in bed; I wished that I had a body like Mark has. No matter, whatever. Happy Nude Day, my ass. I hate that holiday. I wonder if he'll let me drive his car. I wonder if he'll buy me a diamond ring.