21 comments/ 218576 views/ 71 favorites My Life As A Panty Sissy Ch. 01 By: RandomAuthor Author's Warning: This is a story about a man who willingly becomes a sexual submissive and a sissy over a period of years. His mother, his wife, his brother, and eventually his daughter (as well as others) play a part in his life. If you don't like stories that deal with female domination, submissive men or sissy men, then stop reading now. +++++++++++++++++++ There is nothing that sexually excites and arouses me more than panties. The honest truth is that I love looking at them, touching them, sniffing them, and yes – wearing them, too. I'm fortunate enough to have met and married a woman who understands my attraction to panties, and I'm grateful for the fact that she is perfectly okay with my fetish and fully participates in my submission and sissifcation, as well. Looking back, I guess I have my mother and older sister to thank for my panty fetish. When I was growing up, they routinely traipsed around the house dressed in just their bra and panties, or in a t-shirt and panties. Even as I got to be a teenager, they continued to run around half naked in front of me, and while I'm sure they thought nothing of it, seeing them in their underwear everyday unleashed a huge surge of hormones raging through my body, and forced me into seemingly endless masturbation sessions as I thought about, held, and sniffed my mother and sister's worn panties. As an example, I can remember sitting in our living room watching TV with my sister while she sat on the couch cross-legged, or sometimes with her legs lying wide open. I'd frequently have the opportunity to sit and stare at her panties stretched tightly across her pussy for hours at a time. There were times I sat silently with an erection the size of a baseball bat in my pants as I looked at her panty covered crotch, easily making out the sparse pubic hair that covered my sister's mound. When I was lucky, I'd be able to make out the slit between her pussy lips or catch her with her panties creased up between them. Of course, my mother caught me looking at her more than once, but, she never mentioned it and my sister's habits and behavior around me never changed. I'm almost ashamed to admit I would investigate my sister's hamper daily for her worn panties. Sometimes, I'd be rewarded with a pair that was still moist with her natural juices, but almost without fail, every day there was a new pair of panties waiting for me to swipe long enough for a good jerk off session. My mother was less obvious than my sister during those days, but she definitely enabled me more. When she got home from work each day, I'd usually meet her at the front door and carry her stuff inside for her. Then, I'd strike up a conversation asking her a question, or asking about her day, or I'd tell her what I did at school.... anything at all just so I could have a reason to follow her into her room where I knew she would eventually undress out of her work clothes. She never ran me out of there while she changed, and we'd talk nonchalantly as she undressed down to her bra and panties while I sat on her bed and watched in rapt fascination as she unknowingly brought me to a fever pitch. Then, when it was over, I'd run back to my bedroom, lock my door and stroke my aching cock over what I'd just seen. Now, I realize that mothers and sisters around the world most likely do the same thing in their own homes, and the males they live with probably don't give it a second thought. But, that wasn't the way it was for me. I'm sure neither my mother, or my sister, was trying to intentionally excite or arouse me, but, that's exactly what happened. I didn't ask them to do those things, but, I wasn't going to complain and I wasn't going to pass up these chances, either. I'd always be eager to spend time with Mom as soon as she got home, or hang out with my sister to get a guaranteed peek between her legs. When I was seventeen, my sister had just finished college and moved out to Los Angeles with one of her college friends to find an apartment and look for a job in the entertainment industry. Her old bedroom was bigger than mine, so once she left, Mom told me I could take over my sister's bedroom. As I was moving the furniture around, I discovered that my sister had left some of her clothes behind, including a drawer full of her old lingerie – bras, panties, camisoles – a ton of things that were soft and silky – all abandoned and left behind. I could go into a long drawn out explanation of why and how I came to put on my first pair of panties, but I won't. The bottom line is that the temptation of having them there in my room was just too much, and once I put that first pair on, I was hooked. My cock immediately swelled to epic proportions, my heart started to pound in my chest and the snug feeling of the soft material against my skin was overpowering and unyielding. I started out just wearing my sister's panties when I went to bed each night. There's no way I can adequately describe the feeling I got when I pulled my sister's silky panties up my legs and crawled into bed. It seemed like every nerve ending in my body became super sensitive and I came alive in a way I'd never experienced before, and even though I knew what I was doing wasn't normal for a boy, the feeling I got wearing her panties made me look forward to it night after night. Wrong or right, it made me feel incredible and as far as I was concerned, that was enough justification for me. After a couple of weeks, I got so confident wearing her panties, I progressed to where I would put them on under my normal clothes as soon as I got home from school, and wear them as long as I could; usually all through the night until I got up the next morning. There were times I'd walk around with a perpetual hard-on inside her silky panties, and I was as happy as I could be about the way I felt. The only exception to my story, so far, relates to a certain pair of panties I simply refused to wear. It's not because they were worn out, or stretched, or the wrong size..... it was because they were ultra feminine and incredibly girly. This specific pair of panties was bright pink and had rows of tiny ruffles across the butt and in the front, too. For weeks, I avoided these panties in a desperate attempt to convince myself I wasn't actually trying to dress like a girl. And surely, if I'd put them on, the frilly ruffles might work some magic spell on me and I'd wake up the next morning as a female. I sure as hell didn't want that. In the end, I couldn't avoid those panties any longer until one day, I pulled the pink panties out and stepped into them. What I discovered is that they fit me perfectly. They weren't too tight or too loose – they were absolutely perfect. The color and the ruffles made me feel a little self-conscious, but as I looked at myself in the mirror, any uneasiness I had was quickly erased and replaced with a strange new level of excitement..... a feeling that transcended my normal level of arousal. The way I looked and the way those panties made me feel simply took my breath away. And as I stood there, red faced, looking at myself and experiencing that feeling, I made a silent vow that I'd find a way to obtain more pairs of lacy, frilly feminine panties. I wasn't sure how I'd do it, but, I knew I would. I had to. I had my eighteenth birthday a week before I graduated from high school. With my sister being gone and just Mom and me at home, I'd gotten into the habit of checking my mother's hamper once or twice a day for her worn panties, and she never disappointed me. I was always gratified to find a choice pair of Mom's panties, usually with a very pleasant aroma to fill my senses as I stroked my cock. All through the summer, I'd wait until Mom left for work early in the morning, and then I'd raid her hamper looking for panties. Sometimes, I'd take two pairs; one pair to wear and one pair to sniff. I'd lie on her bed and play with myself as I inhaled her motherly scent and masturbated myself until I exploded and spewed cum all over my chest. It was great having constant access to her room and to her panties, and I took advantage of it daily, believe me. Everything was going good for me as that summer wore on. I was wearing my sister's panties full time, and jerking my cock five or six times a day as I held Mom's panties to my face. I had everything I needed and life was perfect...... that is, until that fateful Saturday morning when my mother cornered me in the kitchen after breakfast, saying she wanted to talk to me about something. Thankfully, Mom was kind and gentle in the way she approached our conversation, urging me first to sit down at the kitchen table with her before we had our little talk. I can still remember the loving smile on her face as she looked over at me across the table. I vividly recall her telling me that she loved me and that she wasn't mad at me for anything. Then after a short pause, she just came straight out and said it. "Jason," my Mother began, "I know you've been wearing your sister's panties and I know you've been going through my hamper, I suspect, looking for my panties." I was frozen solid, unable to say a word – fearing she would unleash holy hell on me if I admitted to the truth. "Look," Mom said as she leaned over the table and patted my arm, "I'm not going to judge you or criticize you. If your father was still alive, maybe he'd be having this conversation with you, but, he's not here. You're an adult now, Jason, and I'm not about to lecture you about the choices you make. But, I think this is something we should talk about. Is that okay with you?" I could feel my face turn red and my cheeks becoming warm with embarrassment as we looked at each other. I thought about trying to defend myself, or even trying to dispute what she was saying, but as I sat there, I realized neither of those were really an option. "How did you know?" I finally answered, after we sat there in silence for a minute. "You're my son, Jason." Mom answered. "And despite what you might think, I'm not anywhere close to being blind or stupid. All that time, you probably thought you were being so clever..... staring at your sister and me when we were in our underwear, but, I think it's fair to say I've always been aware of your attention. However," Mom continued, "it was just recently that I realized you were wearing your big sister's panties." I tried to say something, but it felt like my mouth was filled with cotton. My throat was dry and I couldn't utter a word. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to say, especially given the fact that she had already figured everything out. But, just as I was about to apologize and try to beg my way out of the mess I was in, she began speaking again. "I was young once." Mom said to me softly. "And I had boyfriends back then, you know. So, believe it or not, I can understand the urges a young man of your age might be experiencing." "I guess it's a natural thing," Mom went on to say, "that you would be curious about the female body and maybe even attracted to the females around you...... I can understand that. I'm confused about why you'd be wearing panties, though. Can we start there?" I couldn't look her in the eyes. I know I should have been grateful for the graciousness she'd shown me up to now, but, I couldn't bring myself to look up at her. "Mom," I replied, staring down at the table in front of me, "it's complicated and embarrassing. But, I'm sorry for taking your panties. I promise it won't happen again." "Well," mother answered, "to be honest, I'm fairly sure I know exactly why you've been taking my panties and what you've been doing with them. And, just so we're clear on that, I'm not mad or upset with you for taking them. As I said, I think boys have a natural curiosity about those things and I'd much rather you satisfy that curiosity in a safe way, at home, instead of doing something that might get you in trouble." Mom's answer took me by surprise. In a way, what I heard her say was that she knew I was taking her panties to use when I jerked my cock, and she was okay with it! Even the tone in her voice as she spoke was kind and understanding, and when I lifted my head to look up at her, she gave me a slight smile and nodded her head as if to confirm she really said what I thought she said. "It's okay, Jason." She said, as she looked back at me. "I've known for a while and I don't mind. You're not the first young man to be interested in a girl's panties, you know. Actually," she continued after taking a breath, "it's kind of flattering to think someone might be interested in my panties." The smile that turned up from the corner of her mouth made me feel better, and it was at that exact instant I realized my mother really wasn't mad at me. She'd stopped just short of openly giving me permission to continue sniffing her panties, but, as far as I was concerned, that was just a formality. I knew her well enough to know what she was saying. "But," she said after a moment, "I still want you to help me understand why you're wearing your sister's panties." "I like the way they feel on me." I said, almost whispering my answer. "You mean you get excited? Like with an erection when you wear them?" Mom asked. I nodded my head, too embarrassed to answer her. Then, as I lowered my eyes back down to the table to escape her view, she reached over and grasped my hand with hers and urged me not to clam up on her. "Don't run away from me on this, Jason." Mom said to me. "I promise I won't make fun of you or make this difficult. I just need to know...... and it's important for you to tell me the truth." We sat there for several minutes, neither one of us saying anything else. And, with her still holding my hand, I finally looked up at her and spoke. "Yes." I mumbled. "I get an erection when I put them on. It's really hard to explain, Mom, but, it's the most amazing feeling" "What kind of feeling?" She asked. "You mean a sexual feeling, or something else?" The look in Mom's eyes wasn't the look of disgust or sadness. I could tell she was genuinely interested, and I knew from the way she was waiting for my answer she wasn't going to let me get away with out finishing the conversation. "Come on." Mom urged. "I can be a good listener. Just give me a chance, okay?" I swallowed hard and leaned back in my chair, crossing my arms across my chest. Then, before I could stop myself, I told her something that until that precise moment, I'd never even said to myself. "It's not just the sexual feeling I get." I explained. "It just feels right to me, Mom. Maybe it's something I've always wanted...... something I've always longed for. But, it fills a huge hole that was there before, and I know one thing for sure – I don't think I could ever go back to wearing my old underwear. Not ever." What ensued next was over thirty minutes of me confessing how I'd been ogling her and my sister, explaining to my mother how I found my sister's panties, and, pouring my heart out to her about every nasty thing I'd done. I came clean on everything, even telling her about my constant erections and about the frilly panties my sister left behind. I told her how I'd secretly wash and dry my stash of panties while she was gone to work and how I'd hide them away before she got home. I even confessed to her that I'd been checking her hamper daily and using her panties while I masturbated. Before I knew it, I literally told her the complete truth about everything. The whole time I was speaking, she sat there and quietly listened to everything I said. She never interrupted me; never made any facial expressions and never used any body language to make me feel humiliated, embarrassed or foolish. And when I was done, I took a deep breath, looked up at her and said, "There it is. I don't know what more I can say." Mom sat there for a few seconds and then she leaned towards me in her chair as she spoke. "I appreciate the trust you must have in me to say those things, Jason. I can't tell you how good it makes me feel that we can discuss this openly." She gave me a quick smile and asked, "Do you mind if I make a few comments?" I shook my head and emotionally prepared myself for what she might say – almost sure she was going to chastise me for my behavior and my sick panty desires. "First of all," Mom began, "I want you to know I realize how hard it was for you talk to me about this, and I'll make you a promise that I'll never betray that trust. What you say to me, and what I say to you in return, will be just between us. Secondly," she continued, "I have no intention of scolding you for things that happened in the past. What's done is done. The important thing is that you told me the truth." "And about you wearing panties," Mom said as she looked over at me, "if it matters that you have my blessing to switch over to panties as your underwear of choice, then without any reservation what so ever, you have my blessing." "However," she said in a cautioning tone, "I wouldn't go so far as to throw out all your other underwear. You never know when having a pair or two of boxers might come in handy....... like if you were to meet a girl you liked and wanted to go out on a date, or when you go to the doctor's office." The logic in her words made me smile, and when I did, Mom smiled, too. Then she spoke again, saying, "And believe me, I clearly understand your attraction to panties. You're not the first young man in the world to have a panty fetish, and as far as I'm concerned, I bet every woman on this Earth would be secretly pleased if she finds out her man desires and craves her panties. I can't even begin to explain how flattered I am that you would be interested in my panties." "The other part, though," Mom said with a more serious tone, "the sexual part – your constant erections and continuous masturbation...... those things need to be handled differently. You can't keep sneaking around, stealing panties out of the hamper and running off to masturbate in your room all day. If you keep doing that, you'll begin to think that's normal. So, we have to come up with another way for you to deal with your desires." With that, Mom leaned forward to grasp my hand and then she stood up, pulling me up with her. "Come with me." She said. And when I looked at her wondering what she was up to, she tugged my hand and led me up the stairs to her bedroom. When we got there, she led me next to the side of her bed and let go of my hand. Then turning to me, and looking me straight in the eyes, she told me to take my clothes off. She must have seen the look of absolute panic spread across my face because after just a few seconds, she said, "Don't think about it, Jason. Just do as I've asked. Take everything off except your panties." When I didn't move, she took a step closer to me and reached out to softly touch my arm, saying, "You have to trust me and do as I ask, Sweetheart." It felt like time was moving in slow motion, and without another thought, my hands went down to the bottom of my t-shirt and I pulled it over my head. "Good." Mom said. "Keep going. Everything off except your panties." I kicked my sneakers off, not even bothering to untie them, and then bent down to pull my socks off. My hands went to the waistband of my shorts, but, I couldn't bring myself to push them down. Yes, I was wearing panties – that was part of the problem, and I didn't want her to see me wearing them. But, to make matters worse, I was wearing the pink, frilly panties – the ones with the cute, girly ruffles. "Go on." Mom said, softly. "Don't be embarrassed. Just pull your shorts down, step out of them and hand them to me." My head was whirling and I was temped to run out of there as fast as I could, but, I couldn't move. My heart was pounding in my chest and I felt like I was going to pass out. My Life As A Panty Sissy Ch. 01 "Jason." I heard her say, snapping me back to reality. "You're almost there, Sweetheart. Just take your shorts off and hand them to me." I'm not sure how I managed it, but, I did as she asked. I hooked my thumbs into the elastic waistband of my shorts and I pushed them all the way down. I couldn't look at her as I bent down and picked them up off the floor and held them out. My body was flushed with humiliation and embarrassment as I stood there, and when I felt her take the shorts from my hand and toss them on her bed, the soberness of my situation kicked in and I realized I was standing in front of my mother wearing my sister's pink, frilly panties. Almost as soon as she took the shorts away from me, I felt her hand on my chin, tilting my face up to look at her. When we made eye contact, she said, "Look at me, Jason. Don't look away..... look right into my eyes and keep looking at me." She held my stare perfectly and after fifteen seconds or so, she said, "Just stand like this for a minute and keep looking at me. Relax and take a few deep breaths, Sweetheart. You've done good so far. Don't ruin it by doing something senseless." We stared at each other for over a minute, and during that time, my breathing calmed down a little and the pounding in my chest subsided. "Keep looking right at me." She said again. "And, I want you to listen to what I'm going to say. Can you do that for me?" "Yes." I croaked, barely able to talk. "Alright then, now listen carefully." Mom replied. And then without breaking the stare between us, she started to speak. "It's perfectly okay for you to wear panties from now on." Mom began. "And, it's okay for me to see you wearing them. You don't have to hide it anymore. Do you understand?" With our eyes still locked together, I nodded my head and told her I understood. "Now, in just a few moments," she continued, "I'm going to sit down on the bed and look at you. I know this part is going to be difficult, but, I don't want you to cover yourself. Just stay still and let me look. Okay?" My pulse was throbbing in my head, and all I could think about was how happy I was I didn't have a hard-on right then. It was embarrassing enough to have my mother look at me in a pair of panties. It was doubly embarrassing to have her see me with the frilly panties on. And when I thought about the prospect of her seeing me with a hard-on trying to poke its way through the pink, frilly material, I prayed to high heaven I wouldn't get hard in front of her. She didn't wait for me to answer her question. She took a step backwards and sat on the side of her bed and pulled me right in front of her. Then, as if it was some kind of ceremony, she looked up at me, reminded me to be still and then her eyes immediately went to my crotch. Looking down, I watched her face for signs of horror or disgust, but there were none. I saw her eyes flitter all over me down there, staring right at the puffed out bulge where my cock and balls were tightly nestled up against my body and then moving up toward my waist. Then, she leaned to one side, and then the other as if she was looking around my body at my butt. Slowly, her hand came up and she carefully tucked her fingertip into the waistband of the panties and tugged at the waistband ever so slightly. A second later, she repeated the same thing under the elastic leg holes. Without looking up at me, Mom told me she and my sister were shopping together the day my sister bought these panties. "I don't think she wore them very much." She said in a matter-of-fact kind of tone. "Too frilly for her, I think. But, they look wonderful on you." "I think you probably wear one size bigger, though." Mom added as she looked up at me. "And these kind of panties are bikini cut, Jason. They are made to ride low on your hips." "I'll venture a guess your sister's old panties don't hold you in very well when you get excited." Mom went on to say. "You'll probably be much happier with what they call the 'brief' style of panty. I've even seen some cute boyshorts that come up higher than a bikini, but still lower than granny panties." Never in my eighteen years would I have ever thought I'd be having a conversation with my mother about the style of panties I should wear. In a strange way, it hit me as being humorous and I couldn't help but crack a small grin. "If you'd let me," Mom said as she grinned back, "I'd be happy to take you shopping and we could find just the right size and styles for you." "You know," Mom continued, "we could get you some everyday panties that you'd be comfortable in, and we might be able to find something more delicate for special occasions. Would you like that?" Up to that point, I was able to stand there and let her look at me. But, as soon as she said she'd take me panty shopping, something in me snapped and I started getting these visions of her dragging me in and out of every store in the mall announcing at the top of her voice she was there to buy panties for her son. She brought me back to the present when she reached out with both her hands to hold mine, and when I blinked my eyes and looked down at her she said, "We can do it discretely if you're embarrassed about it. No one needs to know they're for you unless you want them to. Maybe I'll even buy some for myself. I bet it would be fun. What do you say?" "Sure." I said, clearing my throat so I could talk. "I guess that would be good." Mom smiled up at me and told me not to worry about shopping, adding that she'd take care of everything. I was starting to feel more comfortable now, especially since she'd offered to take me shopping and seemed to accept me wearing the ruffly panties. In a way, I got this feeling we were about done, and she was going to hand me my shorts and let me go to my room. But, I couldn't have been more wrong. "Sweetheart," Mom said, as she looked up at me, "stay still for a couple of minutes longer. I'm just going to slip your panties down for a minute or two and have a look." As soon as the words left her mouth, her hands rose to my hips, her fingertips pushed under the waistband of those frilly panties and before I knew what was happening, she had my panties part of the way pulled down. I watched in shock as she continued to pull, eventually pulling them down to the point where my cock and balls spilled out in front of her. She paused for a moment, staring at my soft cock, and then slowly pulled the pink panties down to mid-thigh where she left them. Mom didn't say anything for several seconds, and when she finally spoke, I couldn't believe what she said. "Sweetheart." Mother said as her eyes stared at my cock. "You're much bigger than I'd thought you'd be....... And bigger than your father was." I guess it was supposed to be a compliment, and I guess I should have thanked her. But, with the way she'd been talking about taking me shopping for panties and then the way she pulled my panties down and was staring at my cock..... as much as I prayed it wouldn't happen...... it did. I started to get hard right in front of her. She didn't immediately notice that my cock was hardening, but I could feel it starting to grow. And, just a few seconds later, she realized it herself. Her eyes popped open and she stared at my cock as it grew. She didn't look up at me or say a word, but instead, she stared at my rod as it lengthened and thickened right in front of her eyes. Now, I'm not huge down there by any means. But, I think I have a decent sized hard-on once I'm completely hard, and it didn't take long for me to erect to the point where my cock was pointing at the ceiling. Looking down, I could tell Mom was totally taken by surprise, and I didn't know if that was because she was sickened and appalled that her son got an erection in front of her, or because she hadn't seen a hard cock since Dad died some fourteen years ago. I finally had the good sense to move my hands over my cock and cover myself, but as soon as I did, she reached up and pulled my hands away and moved them to my sides and pressed them against my hips. "It's nothing to be ashamed about, Sweetheart." Mom said with a shaky voice. "Don't worry about this. Just keep your hands at your sides and let me look." I stood there, almost shaking, as my cock got harder and harder not more than two feet in front of my mother's face. It throbbed a few times and I heard her gasp when it shook and lurched. "Oh, Jason," she moaned, "forgive me for saying this, but, you have a beautiful penis." Then, realizing what she just said, she looked up at me and blushed. "I'm sorry." She said, almost whispering. "I shouldn't have said that." Believe it or not, after another minute or so, my nervousness was completely gone. I stood there as she told me to, now proudly showing off my hard cock. In a way, I was filled with a sense of confidence, especially after hearing her say my cock was bigger than my Dad's and learning that she thought my cock was beautiful. So as she watched, I flexed my cock muscles and held them clenched, which caused the head of my tool to mushroom with blood and turn a deep crimson color. "Does this happen a lot?" Mom asked. "These erections, I mean?" "Well," I answered, "it definitely happens a lot more when I wear panties." "And then you have to masturbate and they go away?" She asked. "That's the fastest way." I replied. "But, they come back." She raised her hands as if she was going to touch me, but she stopped herself midway and looked up at me. "Can I...." Mom began. "I mean, would it be okay if I...... uh...... touched you?" She asked softly. Looking down at her, I nodded my head to give my approval. She didn't know it, but, she would be the first female to ever touch my cock. And, as her soft hands gently wrapped around my shaft, I closed my eyes and sighed. She touched me very hesitantly at first, almost as if she thought she was going to break the shaft of my cock. But after a few seconds, her grip around my shaft tightened and I moaned out loud. I used all my will power to send her brain waves begging for her to stroke me up and down, but, it didn't work. The only thing she did was rhythmically squeeze my shaft, alternating her tight grip and then a loose one. "I can't believe how hard you are." Mom whispered. "Does it ever hurt?" "Sometimes it doesn't go down by itself." I answered. "Then it might throb if I don't take care of it." "By taking care of it, do you mean masturbate?" She asked, looking up at me. I nodded my head and said, "Yes". Then chuckling a little, I told her that masturbation always seemed to work. Another minute passed as she held my cock in her hands. Then, as slowly as she reached up to grasp me, she lowered her hands to her lap and looked up at me. All of a sudden, my mother's face turned dark red and she looked up at me. Softly, almost too soft for me to hear, she said, "It's okay if you need to do it." A second later, she reached out to take hold of my hand and moved it to my straining cock. "Go ahead." She whispered, as she pressed my hand against my cock, "Show me how you do it." It only took a second for me to realize she was asking me to jerk off in front of her. A million things started flying through my mind as she looked up at me, but it really sunk in what she was asking when she wrapped her tiny hand over mine and started moving it up and down. "Don't be afraid, Sweetheart." She said. "Everyone masturbates. It's a totally natural thing to do. You go ahead and do what you need to do and I'll just be quiet and watch." The last hour had brought about the start of a new relationship between Mom and me. I had totally confessed everything to her. She never raised her voice or reprimanded me for my behavior, and now, I was standing in front of her with my panties down around my knees, sporting a throbbing erection and she was urging me to masturbate in front of her. I wish I could say I didn't want to do it, but, the fact of the matter is: I wanted to jerk off for her in the worst way. The hard-on jutting out from my crotch was evidence I was turned on, and at this point, I was filled with a new kind of excitement – the excitement that she was going to fully allow my panty needs, including my need to masturbate. But it was more than that. Standing in front of her virtually naked with a hard cock was a new and exciting feeling, and the fact that she thought my cock looked good gave me a strange desire to let her look at it as much as she wanted to. I even considered how I might be able to get her to touch it again, maybe even jerk me off. And, the fact that she was my mother never entered into it at all. She had been a major focus point of my masturbation sessions for years, and it was more than just sniffing her panties. I had fantasies of losing my virginity to her and having her teach me every facet of sex – even the really nasty stuff like anal sex. I had fantasies of touching her, her touching me and incredibly nasty things like her using me as her sex toy. All fantasies, that's for sure, but, things I thought about. So, the fact that I was standing in front of her with my panties pulled down and a hard-on was right in line with my dreams and desires. I was enjoying being naked in front of my mother and the idea of letting her watch me stroke myself until I came was very enticing. So, after a few moments of thought, I did exactly what she told me to do. I grasped my cock and started to stroke it. Slowly at first, I began to jack my cock, glancing at her from time to time to judge her reactions. When I first started, she sat there stoically and watched. But after a minute or so, she began looking up at me, meeting my eyes for an instant and then looking back at my cock. I paused for a moment and held my throbbing member out to her, pointing my cock at my mother and then I squeezed it until a drop of precum appeared at the tip. When she saw it, she took a deep breath and looked back up at me. "Sweetheart, do you think it would help if you had something to look at?" Mom asked. "Absolutely." I replied, stroking my cock slowly. She started to get up from where she was sitting on the bed and I took a step backwards without missing a stroke. Then, just like one of my fantasies, she pulled one arm out of her t-shirt and then the other, and pulled her shirt up over her head. "I'm not eighteen anymore." She said, looking up at me as she reached behind her back for the clasp on her bra. "And, I've nursed two children, so don't expect my forty-two year old breasts to be young and perky." The pace of my jacking had increased, and so had my breathing. Mom held the bra up to her chest after she unfastened the clasp, and then after a few seconds, she pulled her bra away and I saw her bare breasts. She dropped her hands to her sides and stood there, letting me look at her full boobs and large, pink nipples. When I looked up at her face, I found that she was watching my fist fly up and down the length of my cock. I stopped my stroking and squeezed my shaft again, milking another drop of precum out the tip of my cock head. "Is this helping?" She asked. "Definitely." I answered. But I wanted more. "Can I see your panties, too?" I asked. "If I say 'Yes' would you do two things for me?" She answered. "Of course." I replied. "What are they?" "The first thing is," Mom began, "I'd like this to last a while, so promise me you won't finish until I tell you to." "Well," I said. "I'll do the best I can. What's the second thing?" "When we're done, would you mind terribly if I shaved you? Down there?" Mom answered, gesturing down at my cock. "Your father never would let me, and, I....." "Sure." I replied, interrupting her. "No problem." With that, I watched as my mother shrugged her shoulders and tucked her thumbs into the waistband of her sweat pants and pushed them down a few inches below her hips. Then, as she stared at my cock, she pushed her sweat pants down to her knees and looked up at me. I'd seen her in her panties hundreds of times before, but, there was something different about seeing her this time. This time, it was purely sexual – and we both knew it. She was exposing herself to me in a sexual way, permitting me to see her panty covered sex. This wasn't the same kind of exposure that happened when she so innocently changed clothes in front of me. This was obvious. She was displaying herself knowing I was going to masturbate while I looked at her. She stood that way for a full minute and then pushed her sweatpants the rest of the way down and stepped out of them. "How do you want me?" She asked. I had no idea what she was asking, and she must have sensed this because after just a few seconds she said, "Do you want me to stand here, or lie down on the bed?" "Lie down." I said. Then before I could stop myself, I added, "And spread your legs really wide so I can see" Mom smiled. "Alright," she giggled, "but, you better remember your promise not to ejaculate until I say so. I want this to last a while, Sweetheart." I watched as Mom sat down on the side of the bed and scooted back about two feet. Then, looking me straight in the eyes, she laid back, brought her knees up and then let them fall open. I was treated to a completely open view of her white panties pulled tightly across her pussy lips. And, amazingly, there was a dark, damp spot right between her legs. My cock ached and throbbed, and as I moved up against the side of the bed, right between her legs ready to fulfill my end of the bargain, I wondered how hard I'd have to beg to be able to sniff her panties while she was wearing them. To be continued. My Life As A Panty Sissy Ch. 02 Author's Warning: This is a story about a man who willingly becomes a sexual submissive and a sissy over a period of years. His mother, his wife, his brother, and eventually his daughter (as well as others) play a part in his life. If you don't like stories that deal with female domination, submissive men or sissy men, then stop reading now. * "Is this okay?" Mom said, as she peered up at me from her bed. "Can you see?" For a minute, I couldn't believe this was happening. I couldn't believe she was actually lying on her bed, naked, except for her panties. Her knees were drawn up and opened wide and I was looking right into my mother's crotch -- right at the gusset of her panties pulled tightly across her vagina -- my own mother's vagina. Staring at her, I was amazed at the detail I could see. Even from three feet away, I could easily see the puffiness of her lips under the thin material of her panties and a slight indentation in the center that was my mother's slit. Beyond that, I knew was her sex..... her pussy..... the origin of the juices that I'd sniffed and licked so many times out of her panties. "You can come closer." Mom said, softly. "As close as you want." And as she said it, she pulled her knees back even more, stretching the soft, silky material of her panties tighter across her mound. Hesitantly, I inched closer to her, moving right up between her legs..... right up to the side of the bed, close enough to touch her crotch if I would have extended my hand. Like the magnetic needle of a compass, I was drawn to her, forced to look at my mother's panty covered pussy, and as I looked down at her, I experienced no guilt, no remorse and no regret. "Jason," Mother said softly, "go ahead now. Do what you need to do." Without having to be told again, I reached for my cock and began to jack myself. But after ten or fifteen seconds, Mom spoke again, saying, "Slow down, Sweetheart. I realize this must be terribly exciting for you, but, this isn't a race, remember?" "Oh yeah." I mumbled, taking my eyes off her crotch and looking up at her briefly. And as my eyes traveled down between her legs again, I was stunned to see her right hand had moved down past her stomach, and it was slowly approaching the waistband of her panty. "Tell me what you want me to do, Jason." She said. "Do you just want to look at me like this, or, do you want me touch myself?" Without thinking, I answered. "Both." She smiled when I looked up at her face. "Alright," she replied, "I'll just stay like this and when you're ready for me to touch myself, just tell me." "It feels like I'm pretty wet down there," Mom added, "if you can hold off long enough, maybe you'd like me to get these panties wet for you and you can smell them when you finish." "Would you still let me look at you, though?" I asked. "Just like you are now, but, without the panties?" "Whatever you want, Sweetheart." Mom answered. "But, the deals off if you cum too soon." This was way beyond anything I cold have ever fantasized or dreamt about. She was going to play with her pussy, and let me watch. Then, she was going to give me her panties and let me look at her pussy while I jerked my cock. "Jason," Mom said softly, "I was just thinking..... you might develop some sort of addiction or dependency on masturbation if you keep running off to your room to masturbate in secret all the time." "Perhaps," she added, "we could work something out". When I looked up at her, she was peering at me through her upturned legs. I was stroking my cock and it was feeling so good. My cock head was wet from precum, and she glanced down at me and smiled. "You're not going to last much longer, are you?" She asked, smiling sweetly at me. "Probably not." I replied. "I'm sorry, I can't help it. Looking at you like that and thinking about you touching yourself and seeing you without your panties, it's like a dream come true for me, Mom." "I'll take that as a compliment, Sweetheart." Mom answered. "But, you did make me a promise, remember? You said you wouldn't ejaculate until I said you could." "I know," I said, "I can't help it. I just don't think I can hold off." "Yes, you can, Jason." Mother said. "You're just used to doing this by yourself and you want immediate gratification." Mother immediately closed her legs and sat up on the bed. Her face was only inches from my cock, and when she sat up she raised her hand to take hold of my wrist and stop my stroking. "We need to get these off of you." She said, as she pointed to the pink panties that were still down around my knees. As I watched, she pushed the panties down around my ankles and told me to get on the bed with her. So, stepping out of the panties, and now completely naked, I climbed up on the bed right next to her. "Okay," she said, "you obviously have a lot to learn about taking the time to actually enjoy your penis, Sweetheart. You can't just wail away at yourself time after time and expect to get any lasting satisfaction from it. That's probably why you're masturbating so much..... you simply don't reach a level of satisfaction that lasts." She shuffled off the bed and reached for the pillows that adorned her headboard. As she cleared them away, she continued speaking, saying, "Sure, the orgasm feels good, but the urge comes back way too soon and the next thing you know, you're tugging at yourself again." After she'd moved all the pillows, she put her hands on her hips and said, "I can see I'm going to have to teach you a few things about anticipation, endurance and how to prolong your pleasure." She told me to lie down in the center of the bed, and then she had me scoot my butt down toward the foot of the bed, almost to where my feel were dangling off the end. Then, she got up on the bed next to me and told me to not to move. As I watched, she got up on her hands and knees and smiled down at me. "Now, don't move. You just stay where you are." Curious as to what she was doing, I was fascinated to see her turn around and carefully lift one knee over my chest and then back up to where her crotch was right above my face. "You stay still and let me do the work, understand?" Mom asked, as she looked back at me lying between her legs. I nodded my head eagerly as I waited to see what she was going to do. I didn't have to wait long, because once she saw me nod my head, I began to feel an incredible warmth engulf my cock. Then, I would feel cool, and then warm again. My head was trapped between her legs, but after a minute I realized she was blowing her warm breath on my throbbing cock as I lay under her. This kept on for several minutes until I felt a new sensation -- the feeling of her slowly dragging her hair across my groin. In my super-sensitive condition, I felt every single strand of hair that caressed me as it drifted over my cock. It was sheer agony and pure ecstasy to endure what she was doing, and after just a few short minutes, my cock was literally aching. It was a combination of pure hell and heaven lying there trying to be still as she caressed and teased me. Time after time she drug her soft hair across my cock, creating little tickling swishes each time she did it. "You're leaking, Sweetheart." I heard her say. "I don't want to touch you very much right now, so I'll try to clean it up without disturbing you too much." I let out a loud moan when I felt her tongue at the end of my cock for a few seconds. I could see well enough to know she was still holding herself up on her hands and elbows, so when I felt her lips and tongue on my cock head again, I knew exactly what she was doing -- bending down and licking the precum from the end of my cock as it lay flat across my belly. At the same time, she lowered herself closer to my face and in a matter of seconds, her panty covered crotch was no more than an inch from my nose. "Can you smell me now?" She asked. "You know that smell don't you, Jason?" "Uh huh." I answered. Her crotch was so close, I could feel her body heat radiating from her pussy, and the headiness of her aroma was strong -- much stronger than from any of her panties I'd taken out of her hamper. And what struck me so strongly was the fact that this was really happening. It wasn't a dream or a fantasy. It wasn't a passing thought that flew into my head while I was jerking myself off. This was real -- my mother's panty covered pussy was just an inch away from my face! Just as I was trying to concentrate on staring up at her pussy and enjoying her smell, I felt an intense hotness on my cock -- the feeling of direct contact up and down my shaft, but in a way I'd never felt before. I got a chance to look down between our bodies and I was able to see her licking the underside of my cock, from tip to base and back again. Still, she hadn't touched me with her hands, but, I was at such a fever pitch, you would have thought she'd been stroking me and building my orgasm for thirty minutes. She stopped for a minute and looked back at me between her legs. "You doing okay back there?" Mom asked. "Ready for more?" She didn't wait for an answer, but instead, she lifted herself up a little, one side at a time, and pulled my hands next to the side of my body and held them there. Then, when she leaned down again, she reached under herself and lifted one of my hands to her breast. "Just touch me lightly, Sweetheart." She said softly. "Both sides at the same time." And so, I did. Reaching up under her, I used both my hands to feel my mother's breasts. Just the nipples at first, lightly feeling them between my fingertips, but then the rest of her breast, cupping them tenderly in the palms of my hand and applying enough pressure just to let her know I was touching her. "Hmm," she moaned, "that's perfect. Just light touches at first. Go slow and be gentle." She added. "Tease me and make me want more. This will make me really, really wet if you do it right." After she said that, she lowered her crotch lower -- just to the point where her panties touched my nose, and then she started moving slowly back of forth, gently rubbing the crotch of her panties against me. I could feel the wetness from her pussy going through the material and moistening the tip my nose, and I could smell her. The aroma was strong now. What I mean is that it was full and constant. My nose was literally tracing a line down the center of her panties and each time the wet spot came over my nose, I bent my head up to try to push my nose between her lips through her panties. She kept moving on top of me for several minutes as I played with her breasts, and I was elated to see that what she said was true -- it made her incredibly wet and it wasn't long before the crotch of her panties was almost saturated. I'd taken it upon myself to start moving my head back and forth, too, and using my tongue when I could to touch her and taste her. She stopped once and lowered herself more, shifting her position to place her pussy right over my mouth, and when she did, I puckered my lips and sucked the material of her panties all the way into my mouth. I sucked the soft material for a few seconds until she moved again, pulling her panties from my mouth. Then, she rubbed down on me again, this time even harder. It wasn't long before she was rubbing her crotch directly on my face, stopping briefly so I could suck her panties for a few seconds, and then she'd move again. She lifted up off me for a few seconds so she could look back at me through her legs. "Would you like me to take them off now, or leave them on a while longer?" She asked. I could barely talk. My heart was thundering in my chest. My face was covered with her motherly lubrication and my nose was full of her scent. It felt like my cock was numb now and it was no longer throbbing -- it was hard as it had ever been and it felt strong and erect. "I think I've probably teased you enough, Sweetheart." She said as she lifted up off me. Then as she lay down next to me, put her hand on my chest and asked me if I wanted to take her panties off. "I'll finish you myself." She whispered. "You can relax and let me do the work. How's that?" My eyes grew wide when I realized what she said. "But," she added, "when we're done, we're going to have to talk about your masturbation. I think I have a few ideas you might like." "Come on," she said, elbowing me, "I'll just lie here and you can direct me. Once you get my panties off, you can lie back down and then I'll take over." I sat up and looked over at her unsure about what I was supposed to do. She saw the question in my eyes, so she helped me out. "It's not a trick, Jason." She said, reaching out for my hand and interlocking her fingers into mine. "You can touch me, feel me, kiss me, look at me...... whatever you want. I'm completely yours right now. But," she said, "whatever you do, don't rush it." "I'll take care of bringing you to orgasm." She assured me. "So, don't worry about that. Just have fun and indulge yourself for a few minutes." When she was finished talking, she squeezed my hand and them smiled at me. I expected her to let go of my hand, but she didn't. Instead, she looked me right in the eye and moved our joined hands down her body, not stopping until she'd brought my hand directly between her legs. Then, using her other hand to cover mine and keep it there, she pulled her first hand away and pressed the palm of my hand deeply into the crotch of her panties and held it there. Still watching me, she pressed my fingers into her warmth -- into the softness of her panties where I could feel the squishiness of her wet lips inside the soft material. She stared at me as she held my hand in her crotch for a minute. Then, without saying a word, she began to move my hand, very slowly at first, up and down her mound. "Feel how wet you made me?" She asked. "Yes." I said, almost whispering as I began to press my fingers down in between her lips to the center of her sex. "I'm really juicy down there now." She said. "I'm all ready for you to take my panties off..... whenever you're ready." She let go of my hand, but, I kept it there between her legs. She smiled and brought her knees up, like she'd done before, and let them fall open with my hand still in her crotch. Without her hand holding me, I was free to touch her however I liked, and I took advantage of the situation by pressing my whole hand into the gusset of her panties and feeling the entire expanse of her mound against my hand. "Oh, that's nice." She moaned. I looked up at her and she'd closed her eyes with a contented smile on her face. I ran my finger up and down her pussy, pushing her panties in between her lips as I did it. After a minute of this, she adjusted herself and relaxed into the bed and I kept touching her. "Feel free to put your hand inside my panties for a few minutes." Mom said, without opening her eyes. "Just be gentle for now. I'll teach you how I like to be touched later." I didn't have to be asked twice, but, I didn't want her to be startled by my eagerness, so I slowly moved my hand from the outside of her panties to her waistband, and then I slowly pushed my hand in. What I felt was like nothing I'd ever felt before. I expected she'd have at least some pubic hair, but I was wrong. She was completely hairless, just like some of the girls I'd seen on the internet. In my wildest dreams, I could have never dreamed all this up. Here I was sitting naked on my mother's bed with my hand inside her panties. The luscious wetness that engulfed my fingers was warm and slippery and as I touched her, she smiled up at me. "Let me help you finish, now." Mom said, sweetly. "Why don't you slip my panties off and lie down. I'll take care of everything and then we can have a nice long talk." Reaching down, Mom slowly urged my hand out of her panties. As it came free of her waistband, she gave me a strange look and then lifted my hand to her mouth and she sucked one of my fingers between her lips. I was spell bound watching her lick and suck her juices from my finger. She did it in such a sensual way -- looking at me with those big blue eyes as she sucked. When she was finished, though, she pushed my hand toward my mouth and I did exactly what I saw her do -- lick her thick juices from my fingers. She reached down and squeezed my cock as I licked, grasping me hard at the base of my cock and then skimming her hand up my shaft. A large bubble of precum came up to the tip of my cock and she dabbed her finger to it and then smiled at me as she moved her finger to her mouth and sucked. Our eyes locked together, both of us sucking the other's juices from our fingers and it was at that moment I realized I was hers -- totally and completely. Withdrawing her finger from her mouth, she said, "Come on, Sweetheart. Let me help you finish now. Take my panties off and lie down so I can make you feel good. I don't want you to have to masturbate so much anymore, so, starting today, I'm going to help you fulfill and live out all your desires, and, teach you how to take care of a woman." To be continued...