0 comments/ 67518 views/ 9 favorites What Women Want From Men Ch. 02 By: almost What a Woman Wants- Chapter 2 Or how to heat up a chilly bed and keep it very hot from now on. Foreword: This is again in response and with the inspiration of many of your questions and responses and I hope it meets with all of your ongoing approval and/or is helpful to some of you at least. You do give me ideas and I do appreciate them. And for those of you determined to flame me for writing this stuff, sorry you don’t like it, reading these is optional you know…lol…Ya don’t have to read them! Sheesh! And yes I do hope to put these together for a book some day. But for now I like writing these, and I’m glad that some of you like reading them .And as for where I learned all this, there is this man named Raoul…and he helped me with this. He is a man among men, and he is incredible, and without him, I wouldn’t be able to write this for you.. So guys, listen up, if you want to be a Raoul in some woman’s life, here is how. Raoul, I know I”ve said it before, but thank you for being you. You are so magnificent, and I feel so very lucky you came into my life. I’m not going to mince words in this, I am going to spell it out, without a lot of soft pedaling and if this isn’t what you want to know well, don’t ask then. For all the men and WOMEN who have wondered how to get in touch with a woman’s sexual being here goes…hope it helps, and good luck to you, Almost What women want in bed, ahhhh, the mysteries of the keys to the female mind and her sexuality, are highly sought after by many, including we women! We women don’t even know this stuff! Is it technique, is it size, is it endurance, is it a cute little thing you all do with that towel trick we all pretend we’ve never seen, is there a drug that will unleash our inner slut, and if so, where do we get that pill…what is it that turns us females on! And half of us don’t know EITHER…so here we go…the magical mystery tour of female sexuality coming up…or how to get her to wear just high heels when she takes out the trash at YOUR house! And do it with GLEE! And maybe, just maybe, every week. But, guys, you have to be very very good first! First and foremost gentlemen, it really isn’t a size issue, although you all almost wish it was, because then you’d understand it at least. And it isn’t endurance and it isn’t technique, although technique is pretty important, oh yes is it, my oh my oh my!…But the first stop on our magical mystery tour, is the female mind, that mysterious confusing place the keys reside in, the location of the holy grail, hidden deep with in every woman, is the first place we shall visit. And with this, begins the solutions to it all. You must enter her mind, and lead her to this new place, by the hand and gently. It isn’t a quick trip and it takes time and patience. You have to lead the way, as every self respecting Don Juan knows, you are the guide and the leader, and in this one thing, you have to lead, or you won’t ever get there gentlemen, with many women. And for those of you, who have women who don’t ever seem to want to, this is how you fix that. And guys, there isn’t a woman out there that hasn’t faked it at least once in a while, although I will probably get flamed for that statement, it is what they all tell me, however… Here’s a side note to consider: Women don’t envy penises, men just WISH they did, and like so many things in life, the theory is bass ackwards…Men envy pussy’s, it’s PUSSY ENVY in reality! And all men all want one (or more, fess up guys! Or more! Most of you would take two, cause they’re small, and maybe one to go to snack on later, it’s true, if you could, you’d all have harems and I, at least, know this!) of their very own…that LIKES them and WANTS them, even CRAVES them at times, ooh, yes, all boys want one of THOSE!…so once upon a time, someone decided to market the philosophy that women envy penises and that they all want one, in the hopes it would convince women they did, and they then WOULD want a PENIS (or more..lol) of THEIR very own, and all you men would have a wonderful life. And to men, life would be soooo simple and so perfect, if all women craved cock like men crave pussy, just think men? Of how wonderful life would be with this hungry insatiable slut waiting for you to give her more of your precious fluids and begging for your pleasure wand, but in reality, nothing would ever get done, because all we would all do is fuck, fuck fuck, and that’s why it doesn’t happen that way! And yes I’m serious! No work would get done, no buses would run, there’d be no power, we’d all still live in caves and we’d die young and very happy, although a bit hungry and chilly from lack of food and heat. It is just yet another example of a typical male solution to the problem of females unpredictability and unfathomability and why there are two sexes, because without both, the world would be incomplete. If women only ran the world, we’d all shop full time and you men would do nothing by paint as we changed from pink to cream to I think that beige is too deep, to pale hints of yellow, not canary mind you, and not lemon, more a shade above cream. If men only ran the world, women would wear pig tails and garter belts and we wouldn’t need transportation, because we wouldn’t ever leave the house because all any of us would ever do is, fuck fuck fuck, so inessence, there is balance in having some of both for all of us. And there is away to get it (well at least some) guys. It is not however a one step solution, nor is it easy to come by as many of you have figured out by now. Women think in great swooping circles, and for all of you who think I’m a man, this should end that question for you. I am a woman, and as such, I do think in curves and arcs and round abouts. All women do, and we hide things even on ourselves and we don’t know, we really don’t, even if we think we do, and yes we will argue, and we often do, and in some ways we do know, but we’ll never tell you what we do know, so we don’t always know what we think we do. Got it? See? I am female…! I can do that all night and day, round and round I go! Only a woman could! And yes we do get a bit confusing. But you men often confound us with your logic and reason too. The reason we are so damned confusing is, in a nutshell, we even confuse ourselves, period. We don’t fake being confusing, we are so good at it we don’t even know how to unconfuse ourselves, or to stop being confusing to anyone, or that we are in fact confusing! We’ll tell you we aren’t confused, YOU are, and you know you are, you just can’t seem to get us to understand that you really are, because we are. Did I make that clear enough? And IF no one teaches us about our sexuality, it remains this great mystery to us all, with varying degrees of response or the lack there of, in any of us. We don’t know what it is, or how to deal with it, or even how to control it, and some of us did get lucky and have a sexual mentor or mother who gave us direction, but most of us didn’t. So, to gain control of a woman’s sexuality, you must work with her mind, and for those of you who weren’t planning to go up that far, that’s what it takes to reach her sexual responses, so in some ways, it is about being figuratively large enough to reach her mind, if not with your physical attributes, your intellectual ones, and it is as simple as that. Metaphorically speaking, that is what the size thing is really about, you got to go up that far guys! And yes this is complex, because women’s minds aren’t simple places, let alone easy to delve into, and it is easy to get lost in the maze we all have in our little brain cavaties, as most of you have long since figured out! A woman’s mind can be beautiful but it can be filled with all sorts of crazy stuff too. To get through that, is to reach what represses her and in so doing, help set her free from that repression that keeps her from being the sexually aware creature all women can be. Did I make that clear enough? Because yes I think in great swooping circles. And anyone who walks continuously in a circle gets lost. And they get dizzy and they make no progress at all, which is very typically female, we’ve done it so long, it feels very normal to us to spin round and round, and we women understand this in each other, so we really think it’s you guys who are sort of confused and don’t get it. You have to teach us to go straight just as we show you how to bend some. Not everyone does have the same level of passion with in them, some people have TONS of it, repressed or not, others have very little. Many are in between somewhere, and libidos are part of the entire response system network.. But if she or HE isn’t aware of how much they have, or if those responses are repressed, they have even less interest or willingness to engage in pleasurable sexual activities, because they aren’t all that pleasurable. Most can be improved on however with some of these techniques and the knowledge of how to generate and increase those responses from inside the person, via techniques and foreplay and even through romantic evenings and fun interactions that couples learn to use to get the blood bubbling and the fires started with in them. We’re the one’s who won’t stop and ask for directions, not you men! Men ask directions all the time, and the only time we women won’t run off at the mouth is when it’s about what we wish you’d do in bed, so we don’t give you those directions and then we blame you for getting lost! The problem is we don’t know either. No one tells us. We either aren’t really sure what we do want, OR we’re sort of scared and nervous and caught up in all the myths that we’re supposed to be naturally sexual and hot, and if we say, oh hey, I’m not all that sexual and hot, we become less of a woman even in our own minds, we women brag to each other even about how sexy we are, it is very much like men and their bravado with each other. We all want to be sexually coveted, we all wish and believe we’re the studs! We project it to other women even that oh yeah, we had hot sex last night, let me tell ya! And to then address it with words, is beyond many women. We can talk, we can’t talk about that, cause THEN you’d KNOW! Which if you know, we do, and if we do, then we have to think about it, and if we think about it, we’ll have to worry, and if we worry, you REALLY aren’t going to get any, because we’ll want to go wash the floor so we get what’s worrying us off our mind! Got that? Any of you still doubt I’m female? I can talk like this for fifty pages without taking a breath or injecting punctuation, uh? I can too! We worry about your inadequacy thing if we tell you that God if you’d only use your hand TOO, and we feel INADEQUATE and shy, or we’re into this good girls will and bad girls don’t thing and we aren’t even sure if we should respond, or if that then makes us bad. So, you fellas have to do it for us. And listen to our little hints and metaphors and sort through it all to figure out what we’re saying, or no slut tonight guys! Sorry, we don’t know how to let her out! We’re not even sure we want to let her out! So if you want her to come out you have to do it. You want to be our master and our friend, our lover and our salvation, well than take the damned wheel and drive! But for heavens sake find out where we need to go first. This is not an easy thing to find without some pre planning and a pretty good idea of what you need to find and do. Or we’d all have figured it out by now! DUH! Women, have brought up the theory of foreplay, that age old, ok, I’ll foreplay ya baby , solution to it all, and we do need foreplay, we ALL do, and gentlemen if you don’t believe that you aren’t doing it right, seriously. We women aren’t men, our sexuality is internalized, not externalized like a man’s is. And the art of lovemaking isn’t about instant gratification it’s about delaying that gratification and letting it build, its riding it like a rollercoaster, thru dips and hills and whooshing down a drop while the screams are forced from our lungs, it’s talent, it’s technique, but it’s also and art that goes far beyond having orgasm as it’s only goal, it’s pleasure, pleasure, and sensations combined with feelings and thoughts and deeds. It’s communication between two bodies on a primal level and it’s love and uniting as one. And guys, if you try it you will like it, this whole foreplay delaying thing is very VERY fun for you too. There is nothing to hurry about, and for those that feel they must, take care of it yourself then, if that’s all it means to you! It is essential for a female, although there are times, when she DOESN”T need it, after she’s learned how to be sexual, but NOT before. Foreplay is more than fifteen minutes, it can be more than an hour, it can be more than four nights straight, gentlemen! And if you have a woman in your life, who says, all she wants to do is cuddle, by golly you may be looking at six weeks of foreplay to break through that block she NEEDS you to get through, and no, you aren’t getting any during that time. Life can be harsh, but at the end of that tunnel can be a lot of darned fun. And what the hell at least you’ll walk around looking dazed for awhile, even if you’re lower lip does tremble a bit! THAT is fore play. And with time, and technique, you can cut it down to even fifteen minutes on the right night, but not until her sexuality is unleashed. Bottom line, you have to find the slut within and then unleash it to be able to have her loose at your house on command, and any well trained dominant on this site knows this. Now, I hate to overstate what would appear to be obvious, but guys, GIRLS aren’t boys. Now that sounds pretty simple in theory, but it isn’t. You need to keep that in mind too…Women react differently then men do, we need different things to feel good, and we like different things than you men do in bed. PERIOD. And if you argue that or fight it, well, don’t even complain she isn’t in the mood. A lot of those things are things you will enjoy too, but, you have to unleash that sexuality before you get any of those. It is abit like having to unzip your pants, but in essence, our sexuality isn’t that easily accessible for anyone, whether we wear panties or not. And I don’t care if she’s 18 or 80, that’s the answer. And if you don’t like the answer, well, I’m sorry, I can’t change the facts and the reality of it, I can just try to explain it. I didn’t plan this infrastructure and interactive platform, I just understand it better than I once did. I can operate it now. I have read sex books and how to books, and erotica and stories, I have looked for solutions causes, ideas and formulas, and no one ever addresses the problem from the stand point that things and life isn’t normal, for everyone and all, and that sexuality is very repressed in modern American women, and to unleash it you must find away to undo that repression. The premise is that every woman should indeed have a sexual on button, and does, it’s like the power of positive thinking or ostriches hiding their heads in the sand, if we don’t talk about it and tell everyone it doesn’t exist, MAYBE it’ll go away, and won’t exist! So we’ll just say every woman is indeed ready to leap forth into her sexuality with a small modicum of touching, a glass of wine, a lingering kiss and smile, and that normal women like sex instantly and take to it like a duck to water. And it ain’t so guys. And if your spouse hands you this, she is trying to tell you something she can’t figure out how to say any other way. She’s saying oh yeah, this is so right on, at last…help me, please and we can indeed do whatever you want and this is what I need. And guys you may have to hand it to her to read. And then listen as she shyly says, well, yeah there’s some good stuff in it, um, what’s on TV? Cause that’s how women deal with sex when it’s in their face, they are afraid to discuss it! It confuses them, makes them blush, and they are frightened to ever say, oh Hey, I’m frigid! So are you like ok with that? That would be a bit like men saying Oh hey, I’m impotent, no big deal, wasn’t big enough anyway! OH yeah THAT’ll happen, you betcha! Well we feel the same way, frigid women aren’t sexy! We aren’t cool, we’re what you all hate and fear and go yuck about! So we, at least in our minds, refuse to accept the problem and without that, we can’t solve it. As every man reading this yells NO! Well, she isn’t sure what to say then. Honey, I”ve been faking it for the last four years isn’t real easy to spit out and it isn’t any easier for you men to handle! The reaction to THAT statement will be a lot of recriminations and self doubt and storming about and anger! Sex is very very difficult to discuss for people. Faking it is lying and we do it, because if we don’t you won’t let up on us, and somewhere in there, we all have to get some sleep. Sex is giving too, and we love the intimacy and the giving and it does give us pleasure to do that for you and for ourselves. We like the touching and the sense of fun, we don’t really mind that we don’t have an orgasm and we don’t want to lose what we have already or upset you fellas. Hell guys we even try to laugh at the towel trick thing you think is so cute! (That is so dumb fellas, it really is pretty damned corny!) We women and you men are besieged with these images we are supposed to compare ourselves to and live up to, and if it were that easy, none of those images would have any value. We see slinky black dresses on perfectly coiffed blondes with sultry lips languishing lazily on billboards, we see Madonna dressed in her undies on stage, we see Brittney gyrating hips suggestively while the crowds go wild with desire, and we listen to men, you smile when you see a tight young butt on a bicycle and claim you’d follow that across America, you tell us you like see through and grin like fools when we put it on, but it doesn’t DO the same thing for us, that it does FOR YOU. We do it to please you and hope somewhere in there, the magic will just come down from the heavens and hit that button called hot, and warm us right the hell up and curl our hair and our toes and cross our ever loving eyes and make us purr for hours after. Guys you make US cum well enough and we will do anything for you! So there is a flip side to this coin about the stuff I write. The man who makes us scream for hours in ecstasy we will do anything for you, and any woman who denies that, hasn’t screamed for hours yet. OH and the kids? What kids? I sent them out to the neighbors, get your butt in this bedroom DAD. NOW. Do that AGAIN. Think I’m kidding? HA! Try it and find out! Men know what they find sexy. They find full pouty lips sexy, they find fiery temperaments sexy, they find willowy and sweet sexy, they find lots of attitude sexy, they find innocent eyes looking up at them with adoration and trust sexy, they find sultry sexy, they find smokey eyes sexy, they find a confident strut sexy, a bold stare sexy, they find eye contact held a bit long sexy, they find naked women and almost naked women and women in baseball caps and women in shirts and women in jeans sexy, and in actuality, men find milk sexy. On the right day! Men can get in the mood over a $1.95 Burger! Women however can’t. Men are far more readily visually stimulated into sexual arousal than women are. Women don’t even know what arouses them at times, it’s often the thought of intimacy, of knowledge and sharing and meeting of the minds and souls as well as bodies. As such, both have their strengths and reasons to exist. We women are so repressed, we barely STILL see naked male bodies as attractive, and even in the media that so invades our daily existence, men are rarely seen COMPLETELY naked, they are seen partially and rear view naked, or? When we see full frontal male nudity, it’s often in a spoof or comedy, and half the guys we see, in magazines and ads, really aren’t that sexy to us. We like MEN, not shaved boys with fake tans, a plastic smile and four pounds of hairspray? We love Mel Gibson, and Sean Connery and manly men, with hair and craggy faces and passionate eyes and an intelligent playful toughness and a soft side they often hide but show us so occasionally on the screen. We like the bravery and chivalry in one, we like how gallant a man can be. We react to these things even more than the physical appearance. What Women Want From Men Ch. 02 We grew up with Clint Eastwood and John Wayne and men who were strong and kind, ethical and moral and somewhat arrogant and stood tall above the others. They protected us, and secretly saw beneath our outer coverings to the women we all are within. We like polish and insolence, we like tight jeans and curved firm butts, we like bad boys in leather jackets with brooding sultry mouths, we like the soulfulness of the rock star and the sensitivity of the artist in all of you, we like the contrasts men offer us, the tough and the tender, the rough and the smooth, the wild and the tame, we like how men ARE as much as how they look. We aren’t men. What we do is wish we had one who was all man for us. We like the contrasts to our feminity and we like the sense of masculinity that has all but gone out of style. We like men who puff up at us and act strong, we like that they give in to us, and love us enough to change or agree, we love being your princesses and your goddesses and we love being on your pedestals, but we also need to be the whore and the fantasy and the woman you crave carnally. We are attracted to things that are male, but more with all our senses, not just the visual. We are more sensually attuned to males then they often are to us. And men like things like how we look and smell, and it often takes time before they can sense more than just visual attraction as a stimulation for them. Male bodies are a bit shocking to us, and we’re not even sure why you all like women’s bodies! Our repression runs very deep gentlemen. And you then show us a picture of some perfect lithe teenage model and say wow, this one’s nice and we run and hide in the closet all but in tears, knowing we can’t compete! It may get you hot, but all it does is upset us, that you don’t and never will want us, because we don’t look like her. And we don’t always realize that all you were doing was hinting that you do have school girl fantasies about cheerleaders and pompoms and you just wish us to play that role for you at times. You men love your penises, even as you suspect we don’t, and in some ways we really aren’t sure what to do about those, we aren’t. You play with them and even as little boys you’re fascinated, but they’re out there for you to play with! Our pleasurable and sexual parts are hidden away and when WE put our hands in our panties, we get our hands slapped and severely scolded and told that’s BAD and DIRTY! Yours were much more convenient to play with for you and we were very sensitive to not just the actions of being corrected, but the attitude that to like those feelings or touch those body parts was a bad thing. Besides, guys are somewhat allowed to play with theirs, women are told not to! So when we first see, the one eyed monster, the snake, the tube steak, your little brain, willy, peter, dick, your mighty cock, your best friend, your love muscle, your submarine, or your towel rack, we’re not quite sure what to make of it. Often fellas the first time we see one, is when one of you “whips it out” so to speak. And we do stare in amazement, we do, as in wow, so THAT’s what that is, huh…amazing! To us it looks pretty damned big, whether our hands are small or not, and you’re going to do what with it? Put it where, and while you worry it isn’t big enough, we are sort of going THAT IS not GOING TO FIT, OH MY HEAVENS YOU ARE NOT! Don’t you pee with that thing? That’s a little much to swallow, and you want us to do what? Taste it? Kiss it and make it spit? Oh my! And this is what love is? It comes as quite a shock to most women guys, it really does. And we may swallow hard a few times before we ever learn to swallow. And then when you treat us, like ours is a bit strange and nasty, and sort of eye it with a combination of distaste and distrust, we really aren’t sure we even want to do this stuff, do you blame us? So if you drop your drawers and some woman sort of goes, want to play Monopoly tonight, this is why? We aren’t used to things sexual, or male sexuality and you have to allow us to get used to them Being a girl is a little tough! We’re supposed to be nice and sweet and pure and innocent and clean and pleasant, and unlike boys, we haven’t talked about bumping uglies and doing the deed and getting down and dirty and funky, we talk about shopping and how you behave instead, but then you want us to get down and raunchy with something we’re not sure we even like or may never have seen before, and you name it all these strange things like it is alive, and may do heavens knows what too? Guys show each other, they strut about nude, they take showers in gym, they laugh about each others equipment and packages, and in all, they’ve had a bit of time to get used to having a penis, so please gentlemen, give us a few minutes to make friends with yours. We do need to contemplate this thing you have hanging out there, just like you once did, and being female means we like to take time to consider it all, but once we figure out it is a source of great enjoyment for US TOO! We’ll like it as much as you do. I promise. Penis envy may not be the result, but penis love and adoration may. Now if this is a bit shocking to you men, and if it is hard for you to accept or if you are frowning going, no this is 2003! Women have seen penises, women don’t think this stuff! And what’s all this crap about they aren’t even sure they like our bodies, this woman has no clue! Well, that’s why we can’t tell you this stuff. Because how you react to it isn’t comforting to us, and we just want some understanding and comfort that’s all, and oh yea this is so what we think! And we want to appeal to you men! Women all have some urge however subliminal to appeal to males, in some way or another, we do want your attention on us. Even subliminally, sexual attraction is so strong and so powerful that, we still feel it for you, repressed or not, whether we’ve gotten used to your maleness or your bodies or your minds, we still want you, and we want you to not only WANT us we want you to figure it out for BOTH of us, because dumbie, you’re the damned man! You lead we follow, this is like dancing and that’s the rules, someone has to lead, and we aren’t sure how to even! And in all those fairy tales, you lead us to the promised land, and you are our salvation and our pleasure guide, and after we submit to you, we give you our souls and our hearts and our bodies and our minds, so if you want all that, you have to do some work first. And if the answer is I just wanted to get laid, well, fine, we’ll just lay here, and you do what ever it is that feels good to you, like a bad Victorian novel, but you can’t have our sexuality with out doing the work! It just doesn’t happen and we can’t help it! And we’d really rather you did know this, cause great sex is damned FUN! We do want your attention and your interest, and we want to be sexy! We want you to think WE are attractive, and the ages old dance of the sexes is about attraction and chemistry and sexual attuning, and even if we don’t understand all of it, some has gotten through to us very loudly and clearly. Men like sex, sexy women have more fun. We all know you like sexy and we all want to be sexy for you to enjoy and like and we want to appeal to you, even if just so you’ll open jars for us! So we put on our sexy clothes, and we put on our make up and our high heels and we strut our stuff, and try not to trip and we wear those RIDICULOUSLY UNCOMFORTABLE garter belts (thank the heavens for thigh highs! Amen!) we take off our clothes, we put on short skirts, we do what ever it is we think we’re supposed to do to be sexy and please you guys. But it doesn’t work! We don’t feel sexy, we don’t reach our own sexuality by putting on clothes or make up, and when they say that sexy is a thought and a sense of excitement, it really is, and outfits are only skin deep sexy if we do feel even that, and until we can reach inside ourselves to where that sexuality lies dormant, it may turn you GUYS on but it doesn’t do much for us. And in the end we are at least as disappointed as anyone and we have no clue how to fix it ourselves. We wanted the white horse guys! We want to fly in the arms of the angel, we want to feel bliss. We wanted to feel and enjoy and be? And it didn’t happen, and we aren’t sure why, or what to do and so we often just go to sleep, figuratively, like Rip Van Winklemisses…and smile at you benignly with out passion and only say Not tonight dear, ok? I’m tired tonight, honey. Saturday night, ok? I have a headache. Good night, smooch! Love ya dear, and turn over like the dormant creatures we’ve become and go right to sleep. We don’t even know what we’re missing and subliminally that is a bit of what we say to you at a time like that, you don’t know what you’re missing either. Sleep time, and all us good little peoples are sound asleep in here, you might as well nod off too. So if you want to know why you aren’t getting any, listen up and pay attention, cause you can fix this, and we so WISH you would! But we’ll never ever tell you that. We’ll tell you your dick is too small before we’ll ever admit we don’t enjoy it like we think we should. And hell yes we blame you, for one, you also blame yourselves, you do, any man out there will immediately say, well I’m a good lover! My woman loves what I do in bed, for another the books and songs do, from I want a man with a slow touch to That don’t impress me much, that won’t keep me warm at night, everything tells you hints of what we need, it does, and you guys do try to figure it out, I know you do…but you don’t understand the size and depth of the problem and it is not simple to deal with, or there wouldn’t be a problem! Gentlemen if you want us to be sexual and open to you, then show us the way, and for a third reason, we’re conditioned to believe you are supposed to handle this for us, from romantic movies to fairy tales, the man is in charge, he rides a white horse, he carries her off in his arms to make her his own, we grew up on that stuff fellas, we want the full meal deal, we do, and you can skip the white horse, if you make us scream for twenty minutes in pleasure, in fact if you make US cum well enough, we’ll do ANYTHING you WANT! and it does say men are supposed to know this stuff, so we agree, and in reality we aren’t sure whose at fault and we are really hoping it is you, because if it isn’t, it’s us. We don’t know how to solve this by ourselves, and we don’t want to be a FRIGID woman or asexual or sexually dysfunctional or have no libido or any of that, any more than a guy wants to think his dick isn’t big enough. And without your help we can’t get there fellas, so…pay attention. We don’t know how to! You have to figure it out and show us, and here is how, if you really want to know. Take a deep breath, be strong, and here goes, we aren’t past the worst of this yet, if you wish to be enlightened, you may find the door to the realm of her sexuality and passions. Just like Raoul showed me where it was, and he was so right, as he always is! Well, maybe not QUITE always. But mostly. More often than I am anyway. Even he admits he isn’t perfect, ALL the time…and I”ll tell you he is most of the time. It is somewhat simple. Inside us all is a little girl. And that little girl does not become a woman until the man she chooses to be her prince, kisses her awake. Yes it is romantic, and it’s a bit oversimplified but it’s also the truth. To many of us, as we’ve learned to look at sex clinically and objectively we’ve forgotten the absolute magic of it, and we’ve discounted that magic and we’ve lost respect for it, and so therefore it has eluded many of us, because we don’t even know that without that magic, there is nothing special about sexuality, it is just a biological function. And females do not have to orgasm to have sex or to enjoy it. They do have to have the magic to feel that sense of pleasure, and that is the truth fellas. Women guard the magic in the world, we have that thing called intuition and with it we can see into a man’s soul. We need that magic to make his life joyful, it is as simple as that. And yes I will get more specific, before you all start dousing people with fairy dust. We women learned from stories and reading, fairy tales and church, we learned from other women who knew as little as we did, women don’t know enough to teach each other about sexuality, we whisper and misinterpret and we aren’t sure, so a lot of what we hear isn’t very accurate. We can talk about SEX, we can discuss our bodies, we spend hours talking about monthly cycles and our hormones, but when it comes to things like ORGASMS or pleasure, or fantasies, we don’t talk much, to anyone at all. Not to each other, not even to ourselves and DEFINITELY not to you men. We’ll smile and agree on that subject, oh boy howdy, we aren’t gonna fess up to nuthin’ honey! Who ever believes women can’t keep a secret, is foolish. We have kept the secret of our own sexuality so completely, and so long and so well, we have lost track of it ourselves, and have no clue it’s inside us all. And men don’t know, unless they are told any more than we women do. And because of this, the key to the realm was hidden and lost, and we aren’t even sure where it is, or how to use it. And all men secretly long to have a holy grail to seek and find, well here’s the grail guys! And even Indiana Jones had sense enough to realize it is a gift in itself, more precious than diamond and gold, and simple in construction. And to sup from the cup of sensual pleasure is the salvation we all seek and our reward on earth that makes us believe we are in heaven, amen. Only men will try to figure it out, and only because at the light of that tunnel is sex. Lots of very hot, erotic, exciting sex. And men will do ANYTHING for that. And perhaps nature did have a good plan after all, for men seek and hunt and think and we women wait and nurture and share, and together we become more than either is alone and better than either can ever be by themselves. It is the holy grail a male seeks and his instincts will send him on the quest for sexual fulfillment and erotic stimulation far more intently than we timid females would ever try to achieve it, we just sort of shrug it off and get a vibrator IF we even do that! So you men are therefore the ones who will happily do the work needed to in fact find the on button for the woman in their lives, for the benefits they will receive, for the joy it will bring, like the gift it is to us all. Gentlemen, if you do this correctly, you will benefit from it, as will we. You will earn the undying gratitude of the woman you do this for. You will enjoy her and she you. And the faking of orgasms will indeed become a dying art. Women need to be understood and loved and they need to feel safe and relaxed before they can unleash their own sexual beings. This does not mean they have to BE in love, it does mean they have to feel cherished and special. To get her to be the slut she can be, you have to remember, she wants to be a monogamous slut, one man’s slut, not just a common slut. You must prove to her she is a lady you both care about and respect and she has to trust you to allow her to be not only who she is, but can be and that you not only want this, but need it and will love her even more for it. You have to teach her it is ok to be passionate and sexual with you. You not only have to teach her to respect and love your body but her own. Once, the prescribed theories were, no sex prior to marriage, no sex outside of marriage, and no casual sex period, and when we did away with those traditions in the spirit of moral freedoms or to some it’s defined as moral decay, and lost those customs, we lost something very important. In that were safety limits, boundaries we could trust and lean on, and knowledge that we weren’t going to end up cast away or misused for just loving you as men. And no, I’m not even espousing that people return to a very rigid tradition and repressed societal interference with our own pleasures, I am not. If marriage was all it took to solve the problems between men and women, you men would drag us to the damned alters in droves! But in between the old way and the new, should be a solution, that sexuality can exist without morality restricting it into oblivion through narrow minded prejudices and archaic notions about moral purity meaning the banishment and denial of sexuality and pleasure. What I am saying is that there was some sense to those traditions, that they were in fact once, based on good theories for human beings, that they gave us good structure and balance and that knowing the rules and knowing people play by them brings safety and sanity to a powerful set of feelings. The magic and respect that human sexual exchanges deserve have been forgotten, ignored and way laid for a very long time, and we pay the price by having meaningless sex, and sexually dysfunctional people everywhere, who really aren’t sure what it’s about, is it pornographic, immoral, or just intensely unusual to have passionate sex with a few creative elements? Or is THAT the norm rather than the prescribed theory that we’ll all get fat at 40 and quit doing that silly stuff, cause we love each other too much to need it anymore? Sex should not be ruled by Middle America, and it should not be dictated to us by churches, who really compete with sex for Sunday morning attendance. And to that I will add, never learn about sex from someone who doesn’t at least like it! Is this such a difficult thing to understand? You don’t ask your minister how to fix your car either! Unless he’s also a mechanic, that is! Sex is special and as such, should be treated with respect and our sexuality should be treated with dignity and reverence for the beauty and joy it truly is and should be. It should be revered as being the magic it is. It’s the glue that binds two wildly different sexes together into one, and makes them better together than apart. It is more important than the chores or work or any distraction, and what it is is communication of souls and spirits and hearts, it’s primal and basic and animalistic, but it’s also a gift we were given in our creation. It is communing with each others bodies, and it is supposed to be very exciting and very pleasurable. It should definitely rank ABOVE watching television, EVEN football, gentlemen! And whether your beliefs include marital vows or religious benedictions prior to this union of two people isn’t the point. The point is, it should be meaningful and special and between two people who at least like and respect each other! Sex is more than just a biological function, and the tradition that men will and still do say whatever they have to get it FROM women, is part of why women are taught to repress their own sexuality, so they don’t fall for every line from every guy who hands them one! Sex deserves respect, and understanding and education and effort, and a lot of us put more effort into learning about which car we wish to buy prior to purchasing it! And every male who uses and discards women like they’re condoms, and treats them with disrespect and a virtual receptacle for their own self involved pleasure and convenience and believes they have no value and are unworthy of respect contributes to this problem over all. If you treat women like they are stupid for liking sex, giving affection or trusting what you say, well, you can hardly blame them for not wanting to be that sort of person. And when one does it to a few, we all hear and we all see how he treats and humiliates her for giving him SEX. And oh yeah we notice! And gentlemen women have long memories and we take notes. SO, it has to be reversed, for women, before they can instantly hit an on switch, as much as we wish we could? We can’t hit that easily or quickly ourselves. And no, we’ll never admit that? That’s part of the problem, because we also believe sex is totally natural and comes to us naturally, and if we aren’t sexual and passionate, we either have a lower libido, or there is something innately wrong with us, for not being “normal” so we swear we’re fine with it, and we all but convince ourselves we are! What Women Want From Men Ch. 02 And this is a very widespread problem and a lot of women ‘fake” orgasms rather than EVER admit they don’t have one! And that is so common, I don’t know a woman that hasn’t faked at least some. We even mischievously work harder at being good at faking those, then we do, at learning how not to need to! And that is feminine logic definitively if I’ve ever known it! Makes sense to us guys! And no, most of us haven’t even a clue why! Women need to be told and shown it is ok, to be a sexual creature. Too many years of disrespect for sexual women, too many men who dis the “easy” girl at school, too many people saying, oh don’t get a reputation! Have taken their toll. Society has labeled sexually active women as tramps, losers, whores, sluts, bitches, fallen angels, will die in abject poverty from disease and pestilence, are cheap trashy and live in trailer courts, and in essence, who in the hell would want to be one of those willingly! Society shakes it heads sadly when women fall from grace, and sighs, what man will want her now, she likes sex! And gentlemen you are as guilty of these misconceptions and double standards as anyone and partially why we’re so confused. Do you want sex or not, is sort of what we end up wondering. Men don’t MARRY sexual women, because they want a good mother for their kids! They marry the woman who isn’t sexual, who is prim and proper and soft spoken and then ten years later sort of wonder why she stopped putting out. She’s a nice girl is why, you chose the most repressed one you could find is why, so you could raise nice repressed daughters of your own. Guys, if you want a lady in the living room, and whore in the bedroom, you may need to teach the one to be both. And although you all seem to think it’s easy to teach that chilled and virtuous woman to be fiery and passionate, in fact, some people never do embrace passion willingly and won’t learn to be sexual. It is easier to teach one manners and how to dress properly, by the way. Part of that is most of them will gladly make that change for you. And some of the ones who appear so sweet and pure, in fact, may never be able to be sexual at all, and may not even like men very much. Our society does this to women, and we all do our part to make those rigid restrictions a very real problem. Women aren’t allowed to talk dirty, it’s very unladylike to swear or to talk about sex, or like sex, is it really any wonder women repress their own sexuality? And part of this whole women’s movement has been about sexual freedom from repression, we want to like sex and have it in our lives. Other cultures like it, and value it and even teach it to people without worrying they’ll misuse sexuality or abuse it. It’s ours that is very adamant that sexuality is a disease and an evil, and as such, I guess I wonder who made those rules and decisions for all of us, and why, if this is evil, were we all born to be able to have this pleasure. Whether its Puritannism, Victorian, or whereever it all started, somewhere along the line, people didn’t want women to be sexual, perhaps they were afraid we’d be TOO sexual and they would run off and screw our tiny little brains out! And no man wants to share a woman he cares about! And before the age of birth control and antibiotics it was a way to insure your child was indeed your own and that you didn’t get incurable disease, which STD’s once were. Male possessiveness is as primal as anything we deal with. Men guard their pussies, because if they don’t, some other man will steal her away, and men like having their own pussy! She makes his life BETTER, she greets him at the entrance to cave with a cool drink, she puts curtains on his windows, she tans his hides into new clothes for him, she keeps him warm at night and she brightens his life with a smile, she makes him laugh as she figures things out, and she amazes him by what and how she learns. And in that, selfish and somewhat overbearing protective rationalization, that women were in fact possessions, women were put to sleep, very much like Snow White was, so that when her Prince arrived, he could awaken her with a kiss and she would only want him ever more, having been guarded well and still chaste and pure, the spring from which only he gets to drink, sweet and gentle, clean and good. The tale of the seven short guys and the Monogamous slut, was so cleaned up to get that G rating, some of us missed that they do a lot more than kiss, after he carries her off to his castle. And if the tale were remade in an X rated version, he darn near drags her to that castle impatient to ravish her completely and mark her as his own for eternity, branding her as his, plunging into her ravenous mind and eager body until she’s nothing but responses and nerve endings. Lucky girl! So is there an airline that flies to this land, because I would book a trip. Really I would. There are two approaches to reaching a female’s sexual release triggers, to find her repressed sexuality, and unleash it. One is through tenderness and patience, gentleness and knowledgeable touching. It’s encouragement for her to be sexual, it’s teasing and teasing and more teasing and oh even more teasing, it’s making her beg for it and then saying, not tonight honey, let’s just cuddle. Men, she is showing you what she needs the only way she knows how. TEASE the living daylights out of her, until your eyes cross and your testicles turn NAVY BLUE, she needs your self denial more than you can ever imagine to get through this, and it is worth it for you both, it really is. And oh start up again tomorrow, do not let her have it! Do not. And when you come home to this soft glowing pleasing sweet enticing begging woman, who all but leaps upon you for more, when the glow reaches her skin, her eyes, and her hair, tease her a few hours more and tenderly take her, and yes, it may take several weeks. At least three or four nights. Well you guys did ask, and this is the answer. This is what women want desperately and have no clue how to tell you because, you’ll get the same look on your face and frown you have from reading this now. It’s that dumb way you all go HUH, no way?! That makes it hard to tell you these things. Seriously. Patience and belief are important. Once there was a courtship ritual, that was very much standardized through out time. It involved getting to know each other, it was often chaperoned by others, so that no sex could take place! It was once called dating in this country, although we’ve all but done away with it, sadly. It’s a dance, it swerves, it’s rhymical, it advances it retreats, it’s step here, step there, follow now turn, dip and spin, and in it men lead. And that is the key to unlocking women’s sexual responsiveness and passion. Those old courtship rituals, weren’t about bringing her flowers, they were about learning her mind, showing her you care, earning her trust and teasing her into awakening, figuratively, literally and metaphorically. There are reasons those customs evolved, because older wiser people knew that women could not just jump into the rack and be happy happy joy joy with it all. And the recipe for sexual foreplay and the ability to awaken a woman’s sexuality is in the above. It is a dance, it does go on for some time, it does involve things like learning to trust and building that trust and it is about proving to her who you are and why she does want to love you. And she will adore you forever, and for a time, you will need to tease her like this ongoingly, but it won’t be long before she begins to develop the early stages of that disease you men all wish she’d get of I-wanna-cock-now. It wont. Sex is a journey, and it starts slow for women. After awhile, they start to go faster, and they’ll keep up. After more time, they’ll all but drag you along, and eventually, if all else fails, she’ll carry you if she has to, but you have to do the first part! Or it doesn’t happen! She can’t help it gentlemen, and very very expensive sexual dysfunction clinics do this, and teach this “delaying” technique to bring out a woman or a man’s mental blocks or repressions preventing their enjoyment and active participation in sexual pleasures. You can do this yourselves at home. In some ways this works like building pressure behind the figurative dam, that any repression literally hides behind and that pressure, through arousal and physical excitement, builds to the point where it has to be released, where it breaks free and all but explodes very much like a dam that’s burst. And the older she is, and the longer that repressive dam has built up, the more it will take, and part of her will not be able to help you do this, the part that built that dam to begin with. The part of her, that through teaching of parents and societal influences, believes pleasure is wrong, that sex really isn’t important nor should it matter. It can be overcome, but it isn’t something fifteen minutes of foreplay or touching the right spot is going to accomplish. You have to enter her body through her mind, and help her unlock the door to her sexual responses gently, with compassion and with understanding and the belief that oh yes you can, and oh yes she wants you too. She just may not be able to admit that. With knowledge, skill, understanding and trust, lots of erogenous zone play, and teasing delaying the gratification to the point she can’t control her own mind, a little manual stimulation and she will go off like a rocket into space, and once she’s learned how and what it’s like, she’ll get right with the program, honest. I am one. I know. And with more experimentation you can expand on this and build a truly pleasurable intimate life long adventure with your woman. This will be continued in the next chapter-and I am not a trained or degreed professional of any sort in the arts and sciences of humanity, nor do I profess to be such. Some of my instructions may be somewhat flawed or incomplete, nor espoused as popular belief. I read a lot, I learned and then Raoul showed me the way, like it was simple! So good luck to all of you who have read this far with interest, and the next chapter will go into more on this subject. What Women Want From Men Ch. 03 What Every Woman Wants –Chapt 3 Awakening of dormant female sexuality phase two. Foreword: I’m still waiting for the flames from the last chapter, with some amusement, knowing they are forthcoming, and for all of you who will indeed claim you don’t need awakening, well GREAT for you! Why’d you read it then? And the reason Henry Ford stopped making only black cars, is because people are different, and I am happy for you! And for those of you who say thanks and who have asked for help with this problem and are looking for solutions, I wish you the very best and all the luck I can send you is yours. I hope this helps some of you, and you are so welcome if it does. And once again, without Raoul, I’d never be able to write any of this or have this thought out now. I had the pieces to a lot of this, the thoughts roamed about, they just didn’t connect for me until Raoul helped me sort through it all. And I repaid him, by confusing him. But I’ll fix it, stay tuned for what men want Chapt 4. Thanks to you all for your ongoing feedback and support, and to one or two of you out there, hey BLOW ME! Love, Almost Oh and to my son Bobo? Honey, you’re me diluted, is all it is. I love you.I will always be your Mom (exit stage left, shrieks of laughter are heard)Yes indeed for those who know, I am Bobo’s mom, oh and is his face rosy! NOT MY MOM!. In the last chapter I began to attempt to illuminate many of you to the workings of at least one feminine mind and in so doing, teach you the codes and nuances of most of our squirrelly little female minds, although the facts may vary some for each of us, the core truth does remain, and in that is a solution if you apply it. Without communication there is no hope. And for those of you who now call me a traitor to women everywhere, hey, I’ll do anything for a great orgasm, you should try it yourselves, is my point! This is a site about sexuality, so why are you here if you don’t want to have earth shattering orgasmic delight? Women even confuse other women! Men are so logical, so linear and straightforward. And to that end you are wonderous to many of us illogical, irrational women, and we play with you because of it, guessing at your predictability, toying with your minds, we do it with such impunity too, because we know you’ll let us, and even shake your heads in amazement at our strange little ways. Your unerring sense of direction and ability to focus, amazes US though, and we just like to see if we can throw you off course at times! You’re all like compasses with needles that always point back to magnetic north and if you hand any woman a compass she will play with it to see if she can trick it into pointing the wrong way. We women are skeptical of abilities we don’t have, it’s like that opening jars thing, we just can’t figure out why you can do that and we can’t! It is a lot of fun to toy with you men, as all women know. But in truth, we envy your simplicity and directness and you amaze us in ways you just don’t understand either. Men are such gentle creatures, they do know their strength and they worry they will hurt us, and that we can’t handle them as physical equals. Your ability to love is in many ways much greater than women’s and we don’t always realixe that. Men adore females in most forms, from mothers, to sisters, to partners, to friends, men like to be around females and to them we are their light and joy and happiness, in one. Men often repress their sexual longings and needs to meet us half way, and we don’t even realize that, nor do we always want it. Men hope it will answer our needs by being more like us, by realizing our sensitivity and it awes them we feel things like we do, or get hurt as easily as we do. The bottom line is the last thing most men ever want to do is hurt a woman they care about, and yes there are twisted versions of everything in society these days, but in reality, men do not want to hurt anything they love or care about and they only wish to protect and comfort. You men like to be what we need, even if it means opening our jars for us. You assume your strength is much greater than ours, and it often is physically, you hate when we’re unhappy or sad, or lost or confused, and you want to help! You also worry that your bodies aren’t attractive to us, nor are your masculine ways, and on that you are VERY WRONG. To men, life is quite simple, you find the problem, you identify it, you then ATTACK IT, and you KILL IT, which isn’t really effective problem solving for the art of love making, at least at some times. So, being men, you then fall back and regroup and then decide what the problem is again, and attack it slightly differently, and then attempt to kill it, yet again, IT being the problem, you men, don’t solve problems you BANISH them. And if the attack doesn’t work, it must be the target that was wrong, because to men, when you attack correctly, you will succeed. In essence that is somewhat an absolute, but it is often the force, the timing and the preplanning that win a battle, not just the attack itself. Men will storm the front gate of a woman’s sexuality for decades and never ever realize you absolutely have to go in through another door, so in essence your linear thinking can limit you men, to sticking far too closely to the literal and not using enough of the figurative, or diversifying your approach to find the secret passageways we women are born with. And we women sit there like deaf mutes suggesting we have no clue what will work, and in many ways we don’t. There is no map we’re given that says, tell him to go THIS way, we sit there half asleep saying oh, that was great, really honey! Gentleman, in nature, there was a master plan for procreation and the continued survival of the species. In that plan, was the males urge to mate, and the females urge to nurture and procreate. And what I’m saying is, sex itself is pretty elementary, if that’s all anyone wants to do with it! Even amoebe’s figure it out. So all this, endurance and stamina and size and angle of the dangle, really isn’t as important as people would like to believe it is, it is the way an amoebe approaches sex, and it isn’t about pleasure or satisfying a woman’s needs and desires. You just wish it was, because you really do want to know! And being men means you approach things with hammers and saws and tools and a serious frown and the directions and say ok, Slot A is here, Point A is there, put one in the other, and here we GO! We women don’t read the directions until the thing looks lopsided. We wait til we’re stumped before using the manual, or we hire someone to do it. We do often put things in the closet and just forget they exist without ever figuring out how to assemble them. Men, on the other hand will spend hours patiently unraveling fifty strings of $2 Christmas lights year after year, so that the family they love, can have joy. And we often do not give men credit for their tenacity and strength and generosity. There is not a man out there that doesn’t hope and wish and want to be a major stud among men. He wants to compete and WIN, he wants respect and admiration, he wants to be good at what he does, and he wants a happy pussy at home! And any man who has all of those things, is on his couch grinning whenever he can be, going Damn, life is so good! I am…THE MAN! Now everyone is different to some extent, and some men want a pussy that does housework and runs carpool and picks up his drycleaning and goes to his business dinners and makes his motor run and his engine purr. Some, really only want great sex, and they will give up or concede or compromise on just about ANYthing else, they’ll hire a maid, they’ll book weekends of romance in San Francisco, they’ll take time off from work, they’ll get up early, whatever you want, they’ll do if you will JUST please lean over that balcony railing naked when they come home. And they’ll be gentle and sweet, they’ll take out the trash, they’ll use lots of tongue, they’ll do WHATEVER it takes to make that pussy happy and adore them. And ladies, it can be very fun to have a man adore you too. You can even hire someone ELSE to take out the trash, if he forgets, it is such a small thing after all. In this all is men are men, and part of what women find attractive about men is that they ARE MEN! We love male strength and hardness, it contrasts with our softness and feminity, we love how you men growl a bit at times, when you sense danger or someone invading your territory, we react to masculinity and male behaviors on a very instinctive primal level. While we now walk upright, in many ways we are still very much animals and sex is as primal a function as ever oozed forth from the swamp. In nature, males win females, through fighting and showing off their strengths and aptitudes. Some species dance, some cavort, but most show their skills and prowess off to a female in some form or another. Some species build elaborate nests and offer their real estate as an attractant to females. There are many different ways different males of different species will attempt to attract a female, there is one constant however, males want to attract females, through the universe known and unknown. And I will guarantee you, more men read this than women will, for just that reason! Human males use almost every attractant any other species will use. They will learn to dance, they will wear the correct plumage, they will get the real estate and build the nest, they will store up great sources of wealth to dazzle her with as an offering in exchange for her devotion, they will even take her shopping, when all else fails. They work out, they build muscle, they worry about six packs and flat abs, they’ll tan, they’ll style their hair, they’ll learn languages, they’ll go to the opera, they will do whatever it takes to attract a female of their own. And then they’ll do whatever it takes to keep her. They are men, its what they do. They can’t help that any more than we women can help being female. Physical challenges between males, fighting for females is pretty common in the animal world. As such they crash and thunder and thud and roar. They trumpet and bugle and bellow and growl. They become fierce and tough, they toss their mighty heads and show their teeth, and the females often blandly watch from the side, knowing that which ever one is the toughest and strongest will win, and that is who will sire their offspring. To the victor belongs the females, and the females are ok with that, and even without popcorn, they’ll sit back to enjoy the show. And take notes. Yeah, number 7 sure looks like he’s wearing out, but 8 looks pretty strong still! Attraction is based on those base survival instincts, and that chemistry everyone talks about is about procreation instincts, primal ones. Where a creature knows instinctively what scientists spend years attempting to decipher, is that to produce superior offspring and perpetuate not only the species but themselves, every living thing in existence somehow instinctively knows they must mate with superior examples of their own kind. It is the prime directive of life. The species must survive, as must the individual, and the individual achieves a form of immortality through producing offspring. Superior offspring are better suited to survive. The fastest survive, the strongest do, the less susceptible to disease and pestilence do, the most intelligent and cunning do, the ones with attitudes do, and some with luck even do. And as such, every male will attempt, instinctively to display why he’s a good choice for a parent to a female. As will she to him. Men also choose healthy specimens to impregnate based on that same instinct, or, it’s why men like attractive women. Attractive is spirit and intelligence, it’s health and fitness, it’s speed and agility, it’s grace and beauty, and it often compliments both their strengths and weaknesses so that they to, contribute to this specie survival by helping with the selection process. The goal is simple, bring forth nothing worse, and hopefully better than they are themselves. It is quite an elaborate and interesting plan nature made for us all. It isn’t a simple formula, and there are many recipes for the continuation and evolution of our species, some include a melting pot of racial types, some include blends, some include differences do attract, and there are reasons for those. We as humans added more layers to the framework, in that we raise our offspring together, so not only do we have to have those attractants we have to be able to cohabitate while we raise those children we produce, we have to get along with each other! Males do the attracting to some extent in our species, but so do females, we females do where plumage, we do show off our strengths, we flirt and swish and attract males, we value those attributes that make males valuable to us, from their real estate to their hoardes of nuts, to their flashing teeth and powerful jaws, all those things matter to us for both our own survival and the survival of our offspring, human females find the attractants males offer stimulating. Including the violence of males contesting for them, the proof they can and will defend and protect their females and their families. When males act male, females react by becoming aroused, and prepared to mate. When a man growls softly and shows his stremgth, many of us women just melt. We do not always want your tenderness and gentleness fellas, sometimes we really like that your strong and manly. It does turn us on. So although you are worried you could hurt us, and do hold yourselves back because you don’t want to, sometimes we want it a little rough, not too, not always, but sometimes. And oh do we! With that comes fantasies and imaginative thoughts. We women do like to be swept off our feet, by romance and by strength. We all secretly long for the wings of flight, the power of being carried away by passions and love, even of being driven wild and driving you men wild too! The power of sexuality is a heady aroma, it has highs and twirls our thoughts of hitherto unknown places we can reach into and explore, it has the taboos of bending the rules, of defying known limits, of daring to challenge the boundaries, of dancing on the edge of cliffs, and of having to trust that we will not fall into the abyss below. The stories of being awoken by a kiss are good ones, as is the one of the Prince with a special slipper that would only fit one. And many of us do long to be carried away tenderly or even not so tenderly. And from all this springs dreams of ravishment, of being carried off to a cave and coveted and owned. We sometimes call those rape fantasies, and if one door won’t work to open the realm of sexual awakening, the other usually will. Rape isn’t the right word however. Rape is a crime, it is not love, it isn’t even sex really, it’s violence and control only, it has no compassion, no regulation and it is far far over the line of where we truly want to go, we just want to break free, not go off the cliff. These fantasies are considered dark and dangerous and as such they often alarm men and frighten women to have these types of thoughts, but, if you understand these and why they happen and exist, it’s not this dark dangerous place, it really isn’t. And although the privatization of secret thought holds some pleasure, the sharing and exploration of those thoughts together is even more exhilarating. It is fun to be sexually uninhibited. And one does not have to go too far to enjoy the pleasures of pushing a boundary a bit. to know we have these fantasies, or that THEY do. It aligns with dark things and wrong doing, when in fact ravishment is not rape. Ravishment is totality, ravishment is being swept away, and responsibility for transitioning from being chaste and pure is taken on by the ravisher. It is a proving of desire, it’s removing the binds of societal repressions, it is in fact a very very exciting thing. Rape fantasies are not rape, and the fact the same word is used, alarms women and men. No woman really wants to be raped, many want to be ravished, at least four times a week if you’re up for it. Rape is when a man, (or woman) forces UNWANTED attentions on someone else. Rapists do not care if that person wants them, knows them, likes them or wants their attention. Rape is totally egocentric and violent and it’s aggression only, not love, not affection. It is power over someone else. Rape fantasies or ravishment fantasies are entirely different in that they are about someone whether known or not, entering the life and body and mind of a woman against her will perhaps, but she wants HIM and IT. Big difference, guys! And big difference girls! It is she wants him, and the old adage of you can’t rape the willing is so true, if she wants this, it’s NOT rape, IF she wants it and him! It is a desire to be ravished and taken and transported through time to a land of pleasure, nothing more. And it is very very primal to want this form of sexual uniting. In cave man times, fellas sort of went forth, found pussy, grabbed her by the hair, and drug her back to the cave! It’s how it was done! He needed pussy, and typical of men, he found, he took, he sat back and asked for a beer! It’s that linear problem solving again. Guys like simple things. He just needed a pussy? He found one, so he carted her off, and said mine, just like he did good firewood! Now with this, some of these women were actually a bit shocked that they were being treated like a possession and/or equated to firewood. They wanted music, and flowers and fine wine and good food! This big hairy beast wasn’t quite what they had planned! And he grunted, like all smart men, when women jabber, wondering who the hell ever taught women to talk! But what happened was, it was sort of exciting, and the silly thought popped into the females head, that wow, he likes me! He wants me enough to risk carting me off and keep me, and I don’t think this is a one night stand here. He’s taking me to his secret cave even! And he isn’t going to ever let me go! This is kind of cool, oh oops, I didn’t think that! And with that, was wow, he’s strong, wow, he smells good, wow, his shoulders are broad. And guys she got horny. Damn those hormones of ours, they’re on YOUR side. And he then took her and taught her her “place”, with a few grunts and swats and said, You PUSSY, you fuck! Me fuck you! And that is why women have these fantasies. Because it is very primal, very basic, very intensely sexual and very fun to consider actually doing! But it really isn’t rape, it’s forced enlightenment and submission. It’s being chosen and not being allowed to say no. It’s being wanted so much, that traditions and rules are ignored and devalued, and it is transcending things like propriety for the sake of needs, our own, and it is very very sexy. AND NO, do not try this at home without a lot of discussion first, and agreement by both parties, because unfortunately there are laws that can be enforced to prevent this, if it isn’t between to consenting adults! And gentlemen, I”d get it in writing if I were you. It can be quite a risk if you don’t. Things like ravishment and bondage, are ways to circumvent and avoid the traps of repression. They are away to break free of those repressions, they are expressions of our passionate natures that can be very rewarding, but they do vary for each person. They aren’t evil however, nor are they twisted if you look at why they are caused and if you do that, you can find constructive and healthy ways to use these fantasies to your mutual advantage and pleasure. It is somewhat pleasurable to enjoy strength and this form of spontaneity for males as well as females. Hope that helps some and there will be another chapter soon-Almost What Women Want From Men Ch. 03 The other way, is through force. This is where rape fantasies come from, and they really aren’t about rape. Rape is when you don’t like the man, want the man or know the man. Rape fantasies are about being transported and freed and released. They are about the removal of guilt, of responsibility for being sexual, they are not rape, they’re dreams of ravishment. And many women dream of being ravished and swept off their feet by the man of their dreams to be taken “away from all this”, and most fear those fantasies at least as much as men wonder why we have them.