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In Memoriam

By: pandsal



I have to admit that when I looked round the congregation at the Memorial Service I had to wonder. How many were there simply to pay tribute to a remarkable woman they had admired? How many were there with more intimate memories? The eulogy sketched in the public details of what had been a very public life. Married at twenty, divorced at thirty-five, twenty years in politics, seven years in the City, tireless work for charitable causes. A career that seemed destined for further distinction until it was suddenly ended at the age of sixty-two. Heart failure, they said, but doesn't everyone die of that? Unexpected in this case but apparently due to some congenital weakness.

Well, that was the public image. Having worked for her for an important part of that career, my thoughts during the Service strayed to much that wasn't even hinted at from the pulpit. I certainly didn't know everything; her ability to compartmentalise was remarkable. But our professional relationship meant that inevitably I had a number of windows into her private activities, some of which I had shared. I knew enough to look across the packed pews and identify many present who would have been there for entirely personal reasons. They were those, male and female, who had enjoyed, albeit briefly, the privilege of her sexual favours. 

Perhaps, after a suitable lapse, some future biographer will be able to tell the full story . For the present, I must warn that many persons in the following narrative will have to be disguised to protect them from infamy, and to protect me from legal action. I shall call her Fay Middleton. That bears no resemblance to her real name but keen students of politics and the financial world may well put two and two together. And, of course, there will be others who will read this and add a private reminiscence or two of their own.

I went to work for Fay shortly after she was first elected to Parliament. Originally, I was hired as a researcher but my ability to organise an office and to get on with all kinds of people earned me swift promotion. As Fay's PA, I came to understand that maintaining her diary, making her appointments and travel arrangements, keeping on top of her correspondence, preparing her daily briefing, and a myriad similar tasks, was much more than a nine-to-five job. I didn't mind because, despite the twenty years between our ages, we were two of a kind; rather than employer and employee we developed a relationship that was much more than that, hard though it is to define.

There was an evening when we had been working late to clear a backlog of correspondence from her constituents. I was tired after a lengthy spell at the computer. A headache was coming on. Fay, who had a genuine instinct for the mood of those around her, came and stood behind my chair, resting her hands on my shoulders.

"You're very tense," she said.

"A bit weary, that's all. We need to get this done. I'll be all right."

"There's not much now that can't wait until tomorrow." Her fingers gently massaged the back of my neck. "Let me relax you for a moment."

Her voice, often strong and strident on the hustings or on the floor of the House, was calm and soft. I'm not one who needs a lot of cosseting but just at that moment I was ready to welcome a little respite at the end of a hard day. The fingers moved more firmly across my shoulders. I closed my eyes and leaned back. 

"That's better," Fay said. "I'll just unfasten these." When she began to open my blouse, I felt no urge to protest. Fay had just turned forty, almost a mother figure or elder sister for me. 

Her hands continued their manipulation, inducing a gradual lessening of the tension. My head began to clear. Inch by inch, Fay's fingers worked their magic down my chest, across the swell of my breasts. I have never needed a great deal of support; I know now that my bra, flimsy and lacy as it was that evening, concealed little. More to the point, as Fay told me later, it revealed nipples she was sure would respond to stimulation. At first, the contact was so minimal I almost ignored it as accidental. By the time it became clear it was more than that, I was past resisting. I was being seduced by another woman, and I wanted it to happen. Perhaps, never having known the experience before, I had subconsciously invited it.

"My dear Pam," she murmured, moving round to remove my blouse and bra, bending closer, "You can't imagine how much I've wanted ot do this ever since you came to work for me."

Her lips closed round a nipple and teased it, drawing it out. It was as though she knew without asking how quickly I respond to being aroused by a clever mouth and fingers. And now I was discovering how much more erotic it can be when the tongue and fingers are another woman's. I could have taken as much as she cared to give, but Fay had other ideas. She turned my swivel chair away from the desk, knelt, pushed back my skirt and parted my knees. Her hands reached up round my thighs. 

"Lift up, dear," she said. "We mustn't be too long." When I complied, she slipped off my knickers in one swift movement. For a moment she paused, contemplating my pussy, her face so close I could feel the warmth of her breathing. When her fingers parted my lips and the tip of her tongue fluttered across my clitoris, I bucked as though I'd been given an electric shock.

"Stay still. I'll make it good for you. No more tension." While I tried to do as she wanted, it was impossible. The unprecedented nature of the situation was blowing my mind; at the same time the skill of her application was producing physical responses I couldn't control, nor wanted to. Her tongue delved, my hands clasped the back of her head, my bottom rose from the seat to force us closer together. At some point she contrived to insert two fingers. How and when it happened I don't know bur it was the trigger point. My orgasm exploded, huge and all encompassing. When it eventually began to subside, I slumped back into the chair, panting.

Fay swayed back on to her haunches and looked up at me. "First time?"

she asked. Once again she seemed to know.

"Yes," I said.

"It needn't be the last."

A ll I could think was that I wanted what had just engulfed me to happen again and again. But this was Fay Middleton, Member of Parliament for Backwater South, my employer, old enough to be from another generation.

"How can it?"

"Be patient, Pam dear, and be discreet, . You know how this place gossips. Well, make sure we give them nothing to gossip about. Trust me, and there won't be a problem as long as I can trust you. And I believe I can." She said all this with such confidence, I couldn't find the words to express my apprehensions.

I nodded. "But what about you now? Do you want me to - "

"There's probably nothing I'd enjoy more, but not this evening. I have to vote in the Division and after that I've promised to have that supper with young Mr Spender, haven't I?" J T Spender was the latest recruit to the Correspondents' lobby. Thirty-six, tall, very self-confident, the subject of much Westminster speculation. He'd approached Fay for an interview to do a profile and they'd agreed the supper date. It was in the diary. "My guess is our Mr Spender is after more than just an interview, and in that case I don't want to disappoint him. I wouldn't want you to take the edge off my appetite. But next time - I promise."

In twenty minutes I had learned a lot about Fay Middleton. First and foremost that she was an expert lover who could have me at any time she wanted. But secondly, she had an ability to close the door on a relationship, not permanently, but until she was ready to open it again. I had never encountered anyone like her before and I guessed no one had written a guide book. I knew I would succumb next time she beckoned; but I knew, too, I had to be very wary and prepared at any time to be either exhilarated or disappointed.

The following day, Fay left a message to say she was going straight into a meeting in one of the Committee Rooms without calling at the office first. I was not short of work: in any quiet moment I was gradually transferring Fay's personal contacts records from an old card index to a proper data base on the computer. It was necessary but boring and I was just taking a break with my salad lunch when Fay breezed in. I brought her up to speed on the calls I'd taken during her absence. She nodded and began returning them. No reference had been made to what had happened between us the previous evening.

During a lull between calls, I tried an oblique approach. "How was Mr Spender?"

"Satisfactory." Fay's expression gave nothing away. "Yes, you could say very satisfactory. On the LBW scale, B."

At that time, I didn't understand these coded indications that were appended to some of the names of Fay's contacts; I just added them as instructed. Though I soon noticed the subjects were all male, I doubted they had anything to do with cricket. Some time elapsed, and our relationship had developed from that first strange encounter, before I learned the secret. One day when I was updating the records, Fay casually offered the explanation. L equalled 'long', and W equalled 'wide.' B meant simply 'big.' "Hey," I thought, remembering the attractive lobby correspondent, "Hey, Big Spender."

****************

I've jumped ahead of events somewhat, but I've already given some indication of the mercurial mood changes that governed Fay's private life. Professionally, in her political aims and responsibilities, she was focussed to the point of being single-minded. Her appointment as a junior Minister was acknowledged on all sides as the reward for a keen intellect and hard work. Not to mention fierce ambition. She applied herself no less determinedly to satisfying her physical needs, and it was here that she was unpredictable. Whether she wanted to fuck or be fucked, whether she wanted a man or another woman, whether she wished to consult the LBW register or ignore it, seemed to depend only on the whim of the moment. For as long as I knew her, I was unable to detect any pattern to these activities even after I came to play a significantly greater, though far from exclusive, role in them.

Not long after she had seduced me so expertly in our office, we were on a weekend visit to her constituency. It was the first time I had been asked to accompany her. Ostensibly, I was there to get to know the area and to make notes during her surgery interviews and meetings. Valid reasons, certainly, but, as I grew to understand on further trips, a smokescreen for what she had in mind for me after working hours.

There was no clearer demonstration of Fay's clinical approach to a situation than her purchase of a house in the Backwater area even before she had been adopted as a Parliamentary candidate for the constituency. The locals lapped up that sign of her commitment. The by-product was that now, on our visits, it was quite natural for her to save me the expense of a hotel by offering me the use of her spare bedroom.

We were at the end of a long day made more tedious by the pettiness of many of the problems brought to Fay for her consideration. We were relaxing in her sitting room with a glass of wine. "I'll be glad to get back to London," she said, "but not before you and I have had the chance to enjoy some time together."

I guessed - hoped - where that remark was leading but chose to say nothing.

"We do have some unfinished business, don't we?"

Curious, I still waited but I was feeling the delicious tingle start to build.

"No need to be shy, Pam. You made me an offer which I had had to decline because of JT Spender. I admit he wasn't exactly a disappointment but I did regret leaving you at a particularly interesting juncture. It was, wasn't it?"

This time I nodded.

"I know." She got up, took my glass and led me to the stairs. "We'll finish these up there. Unless we find something more exciting to do." As she gave me back the glass, her hand brushed across my breast. A promise.

By the time she had guided me into her bedroom I had lost all ability to play Miss Cool. I knew where this was heading and I couldn't wait to get there. Slightly to my surprise, Fay - masterful Fay - was as eager as I was. All pretence abandoned, there was no initial subtlety. We stripped and threw ourselves on to the bed. "My turn first. You owe me," was all she said as she turned on to her back, opened her legs and thrust my head between them. Inexperienced though I was with another woman, I learned quickly, latent instincts surfacing, guiding my tongue between her labia, lapping at the wetness. And she really was wet, ready to surrender herself. I sensed that somehow she had been building all day towards this moment.

Suddenly, she cried "Wait", pulled away from me and twisted to open the drawer of a bedside cabinet. Taking out a long black moulded penis with ribbed edges, she pushed into my hand. "Use this," she gasped. "Inside. Fuck me with it." When I moved to do so, she fell back, murmuring, "Lick me, too. Get me off."

It was easy, needing little or no skill on my part. When I eased the phallus into her receptive pussy, she asked for it harder. When I changed from licking her clitoris to nibbling at the distended tip, she pulled me round at right angles to her and began to squeeze my left breast. Her body was almost impossible to control as she lunged up from the bed to force the black cock deeper and deeper into her innermost recesses. The nearer Fay came to her orgasm, the more vocal she became and the more basic her vocabulary. 

Fleetingly, I had a mental image of this woman standing in her dark business suit at the Despatch Box making a formal statement to the House, and tried to reconcile that with the woman crying out, "Fuck me. Fill my cunt. Make me come!" while writhing under the promptings of my mouth and my frenzied insertion of the rigid prosthetic. 

The hand that had been massaging my breast began to dig into the flesh, the grip tightening until it hurt me. I tried to prise her away but it was impossible. Her climax was upon her and there was nothing to be done now except to let it take its course. When it came, she gave a long, wailing cry and clapped her hand to her mound as I pulled away. As one woman observing another, knowing in my own body what she was experiencing, I could only watch in envy as, slowly and deliciously, the suffusing electricity drained from her and she fell back on a pillow, momentarily exhausted.

"Pam, my darling," she said as her composure began to return, "I'd been waiting a long time for that. But it was even better than I had imagined it would be."

"You've been thinking of me - doing that?"

"Sometimes I've watched you at the computer and been so tempted to ask you to do it there and then. I knew I would be wet and ready for you, but it wasn't right. Not there. Not then. I wanted there to be time. And now there is. Because we've only just started, haven't we?"

I nodded, unsure what to say.

"Let me look at you, then. We've been so involved, I haven't really had a chance. But let's get comfortable first." She asked me to stand while she removed the bed covers and turned back crisp white sheets. Then, after placing a pillow against the headboard and making herself comfortable against it, she motioned for me to join her. "I like small tits," she said, caressing mine. "My own are nothing special, are they?"

It's true they were not large but their shape, more pointed than round, gave real prominence to dark, unusually long nipples. Tentatively, I put out a hand to touch and felt them instantly spring to life. "That's nice," she murmured, "but you've already looked after me, at least for the moment. We need to think about you." She looked own. Her hand traced a path across my groin. "You don't have to shave, do you? Not the way I do. You're lucky not to be dark." Her pubic mound, which I had already discovered was quite pronounced, was bare while mine never displayed more than a light fuzz as fair as my hair.

"Do something for me," she said. I looked into her face, needing more encouragement. Not having come down fully from our earlier exploits, which had been largely for her benefit, I wanted to go on but I wasn't sure how. Looking back, I can see that from the outset I always acknowledged that Fay would lead and I would follow.

"Touch yourself. Show me what's good." She took my hand from her breast and placed it at the top of my pussy opening. After what had gone before, I had no reason to be shy but I felt awkward, hesitant. Fay soon realised she had to take charge. Propping herself on one elbow she used her free hand to begin manipulating my tits, first one, then the other, working the nipples. "Please, Pam," she murmured, "Show me what's good for you - so I'll know what to do."

I let my finger slip inside me. As I'd expected, I was already wet. My normal means of getting myself off is with my middle finger (I'm left-handed), although sometimes I need to use my first and middle fingers, one each side of my clitoris. Because the latter always works, and because I wanted to please Fay, I went straight away to the two-finger method. Fay pushed herself up and leaned in to see exactly what I was doing; satisfied, she lay back and looked intensely into my face, all the while offering soft words of approval and encouragement. 

Soon I began to relax and concentrate on the warm glow developing between my legs. Fay suggested I should go faster but asked me to tell her when I was getting close. That wasn't necessary. The way my breathing grew heavy and irregular, combined with the movement of my hips as my groin rose to meet my fingers, told her all she needed to know.

"Nearly there?"

"Yes." My voice was almost a groan. My fingers were taking me where I needed to be. But on the point of reaching a wonderful orgasm, I felt my wrist gripped firmly by Fay's hand. "No, Pam, not yet. I want to help you. Will you let me?"

Stopped like that in mid air, I would have agreed to anything. Fay knew that and didn't wait for my approval. I felt two fingers slide inside me. She had changed position and was kneeling over me so that she could still watch my face. Her fingers curled inside me, exerting subtle pressure, sometimes no more than a caress, at others moving in and out, finger-fucking. "Both of us together," she said. "Keep touching yourself."

My fingers resumed contact with the most sensitive spot, almost as though they had a will of their own. The inexorable build-up quickly returned, never having completely subsided. But again, when it seemed it was about to burst through, Fay contrived to hold it at bay. The fingers inside me were still. Her other hand arrested my own contribution. 

After perhaps thirty seconds, she said, "Wait, let's see if this helps." She delved into the bedside drawer and produced a small pot of white cream. Scooping a tiny amount on to the end of her finger, she dabbed it on to the tip of my clitoris and gently rubbed it in. The result was strange: a kind of cooling effect without in any way impairing sensitivity. "It's quite harmless," she said. "It just has a mild anaesthetic effect. It'll slow you down ever so slightly. Give you more control. All right now?"

"Yes, I'm ready." In truth, I could hardly wait.

"Good. Spread wide for me." Her fingers suddenly rammed into me, starting a fiercer finger-fuck. With the hand that had previously prevented me me from continuing, she turned her attention to my nipples, tweaking them, squeezing them, hurting me. "Can you take this?" she asked, smiling down at me without breaking rhythm. To my surprise I found that not only could I bear what she was doing, it seemed to add to my pleasure. The cream was having a beneficial effect, too. The build-up was undeniably slower but it was even more pleasurable. Encouraged by Fay, I began yet another drive for fulfilment with my own fingers. "That's lovely, Pam. Go on."


In Memoriam



I redoubled my fingering efforts. Once more, I was sure nothing could come between me and what was now an all-consuming desire. Once more, I was mistaken. Fay's mastery of my body was complete. I have no idea how many times she led me to the edge only to hold me back, helped no doubt by the effect of the cream. It was indescribably delicious torture, sustaining me in a state of extreme arousal that I had only ever experienced before in the most brief bursts of intensity.

Of course, it couldn't continue indefinitely. For all that I wanted it go on, that desire was overcome by the compelling necessity for the ultimate reward. Probably the effect of the cream was wearing off. I simply couldn't take any more and I cried out for release. "Fay! Do it for me. For God's sake make me come!"

"Excellent," she responded, as though she had achieved what she had been aiming for. For the brief time that was necessary her hand and mine found an immediate harmony. My most sensitive internal nerve ends took the message and sent it in wave after wave through my entire body. It was an orgasm whose like I had never known, hardly dreamed could be possible. I heard, distantly, Fay's voice. "Now tell me: wasn't that special?" Still gulping for breath, I let her know it had been very special indeed.

"I'm sure it was. Just take your time getting over it so you can remember everything. It can't always be quite that sensational, I'm afraid, though we can always try." I smiled up at her, wanting to let her see that I would be willing whenever she was. "When you're ready," she went on, "we'll try something else."

Older and wiser though I now am, it still seems to me there wasn't much we didn't try. There was a lot of sixty-nine, licking, sucking and fingering, and there were - for me - new experiences. I was spanked across Fay's knee and I found myself urging her to be firmer; she lubricated her finger and put it into my bottom ; towards the end, she extracted a strap-on harness from the bedside drawer, buckled it on to herself and fucked me with that, though I confess it didn't do as much for me as the rest of her repertoire. However, there is no denying that I lost count of my orgasms before I fell into an exhausted sleep.

****************

The next morning at breakfast Fay said very matter-of-factly, "About last night.

It was good for you?"

"More than good."

"And for me. The question is, where do we go from here? If we go on, can you cope?"

"In what way?"

"In the office, everything will have to be normal."

"Of course."

"If we get together, it will have to be my call. And it might not be often. That's what I meant when I asked if you can cope."

"Better than nothing."

"Do you have a boy friend?"

"Yes."

"Do you have sex with him?"

"From time to time, yes." I had been with Miles, on and off, for about eighteen months. I think he took our relationship more seriously than I did. Once or twice he had mentioned marriage but I told him firmly I wasn't ready for the foreseeable future. Nevertheless, without being a dream lover he could satisfy me so we continued to share a bed most week-ends.

"That's good. You've probably deduced that I'm not a lesbian; I simply like women as much as I like men. It was one reason why I divorced David, and why I've looked ever since for short-term relationships. At Westminster, with so many people away from home for most of the week, they are easy to find. There is no need to become dependent on anyone, no matter how good they are in bed. Besides, I've discovered I like the variety. Not knowing how the next one will be. My only concession is occasionally to have a second fling with one of the better ones."

Maybe it was then that she explained the LBW code to me but I can't be certain. At that time it wasn't what was uppermost in my mind, because she went on, "What I could foresee here is something less impermanent for us. If you can accept it on my terms. If you can't, I could understand that. I just think we need to confront the question now." 

I was absorbing the fact that I would be one among a number, albeit with a somewhat privileged position. Could I cope with that? It was a valid question and only I could answer it. Yet there was really only one answer. So soon after the events of the previous night, there was no way I could turn aside, confine all that ecstasy to a one-night stand. "I'd like to try," I said.

"Good." Fay picked up my hand from the table and kissed the tips of my fingers. "If it ever gets too much, just tell me."

She never broached the subject again. Returning on the train to London and back in the office, it was as though I had never known the erotic thrill of her fingers inside me, the ultimate command she had assumed of my body and its responses.

Over the following months and years, everything worked out exactly as she had outlined. Inevitably, I often knew when she was leaving the House to go to bed with her latest conquest. If it was male, and he didn't fail the LBW criteria completely, the following day I would have to make the appropriate note on the contact database. Of course, it wasn't easy. I eventually ended my relationship with Miles but found replacements from time to time when I felt the need, to put it plainly, of a good fuck.

However, what kept me going were the occasions when Fay wanted whatever it was she derived from our relationship. I never fathomed her motivation and after a while gave up trying. To be fair, our times together were more frequent than I had feared they would be. One reason was a minor coup whereby Fay persuaded the senior Civil Servant in our Department to dispense with the official chauffeur for her ministerial car, instead allowing me to act as her driver. There was a prolonged hassle over insurance but the saving of the chauffeur's salary won the day.

As a result I drove her to meetings and other official functions, took notes when required, and drove her back. It was on these return journeys that Fay would sometimes tell me to look for a conveniently secluded place to pull off the road for a while. I invariably discovered an element of premeditation on her part because she would start by guiding my hand under her skirt - where I would find she wasn't wearing knickers.

One evening, she spotted a sign to a turning ahead and suggested we gave it a try. It was a country road that soon reached a dead end on the edge of a wood. Thinking our luck was in, we set the seats back and were soon into a heavy session of fingering and licking. It was Fay, lifting her head from my lap, who saw the first face at the window. "Keep still," she said to me very quietly, "We're being watched. Does that worry you?"

I'd been into so much with Fay, I suppressed my first instinct and whispered cautious assent. Fay made me sit up, half turning me in my seat and opening my legs so the man could see. She opened the window a couple of inches. The man, who seemed to be fairly elderly, said, "Can you give us a show? There's three of us. We thought you was the regulars. They sometimes come here about this time."

Fay's response was to start fondling my pussy with one hand while she parted her own lips with the other. Clearly, the situation had aroused her. I guessed she had decided that in this place and in semi-darkness there was no risk of being recognised. Already turned on by what we had been doing, she was getting an extra charge from the presence of the onlooker. And as soon as I was aware that she was very relaxed about things, I realised it was getting to me too.

As my eyes grew accustomed to the gloom, two more men appeared to join the one who had spoken. All three had their trousers open - one had his round his ankles - and they were handling cocks in varying states of erection. "Are you wet, miss?" asked the first man. Throughout he would be the only one to speak. In response, Fay dipped three fingers into her pussy, opened the window a little wider and held out her hand for inspection. I knew, because I'd been there moments earlier, the voyeurs wouldn't be disappointed. The one with his trousers down, thrust his cock towards her. She let it rest briefly on her upturned fingers, then closed it round his cock and gave a few gentle tugs. The man gasped and a jet of cum escaped from the end of his cock, leaving a dribble down the glass.

Emboldened, a second cock was offered and received the same treatment, surviving not much longer than his predecessor. 

"Can I have a turn?" It was the elderly spokesman for the trio. Fay didn't answer. Instead, she beckoned him closer while she opened her blouse and pulled her bra up above her breasts. She wound down the window and indicated what she wanted. The man obviously understood but it took some effort before he could deliver. His cock was quite long with a circumcised head, but only half erect. He began to masturbate it in a series of rapid jerks while trying to aim it through the window. Fay put her hand under her tits and thrust them upward. The man was grunting with the effort of his masturbation, but suddenly he groaned and spurted, continuing to handle himself until every last drop had been extracted. Most of it had reached its intended target and Fay was massaging it into her bosom.

"Thanks, miss. Thanks a lot," said the man. He closed his zip and the threesome melted away into the shadows. 

Fay pressed the button to wind up the window and closed her blouse. "Well, that was a surprise," she said, "but I enjoyed it. Were you scared at all?"

"No, not really." Surprisingly, I hadn't been.

"I'm still a bit in the air and I wish you could finish me off, but I don't want them to think they can come back. We'd better go."

That unexpected episode apart, our really satisfying sessions were when we could escape to Fay's house in the constituency. But then came a setback we were not prepared for. The reader will probably remember the Election: the Government went into it with a healthy lead in the opinion polls and came out of it with an overall minority of fourteen in the House of Commons. Fay survived, granted with a reduced margin of victory, but everything else went: her junior Minister's post and with it all hope of the cabinet place that had seemed only a matter of time and the next reshuffle but one. And, of course, we lost the official car and my role as chauffeur. Up to a point our sexual activities seemed to benefit: fewer functions, more time, though, of course, I was still sharing Fay with others, known and unknown.

The single-mindedness which characterised virtually everything Fay did was now turned to the future. Resolved not to stand again at the next General Election, she set about planning for what lay after politics. Her reputation was fortunately undamaged by the defeat; her ability was still bankable. She already had useful contacts in the public and private sectors, and these she cultivated assiduously. How much that entailed offering favours of her own I can't say but it seems improbable that she didn't.

The need arose quite quickly. The new Government's small majority was making legislation difficult. The Prime Minister called a snap Election and won it in a landslide. Fay kept to her resolution and didn't stand. When I was wondering where this would leave me, she asked me to stay on as her PA. She was into her fifties but with no thought of retiring (from private as well as public activity). Naturally, I accepted. I hadn't married and still derived more satisfaction with Fay than with any of the men I took to bed when I felt the urge.

Predictably, Fay was as successful in her new campaign as she had been in everything she undertook. Seats on a handful of quangos and charitable organisations gave her public profile and an image of one who worked for the general good. But it was three directorships in the private sector that enabled her to sell the house in Backwater and buy a new base in Chelsea. Over the years I had retained my own London apartment and was able to disappear there when not needed by Fay.

It was almost a year before Sir Bernard loomed large on the horizon. Sir Bernard was Chairman of a group of financial companies that had a vacancy for a non-executive Director. He and Fay had met on a number of occasions when she was still in office. They both knew that what she could contribute and they both had an idea of what her qualities were worth. I was present at a few of their meetings while they circled each other in search of clinching rapport. When that point was reached, Sir Bernard said, "You drive a hard bargain. I'll tell you what we'll do. Come and spend the weekend with Betty and me, and we'll sign on the dotted line then." Fay agreed with a satisfied smile.

We were just leaving when Sir Bernard said, "And when you come next weekend - you know where we are - bring Pam with you."

Outside, I asked, "What was that about? Won't I just be in the way?"

"I doubt it. Bernard and I are, shall we say, old acquaintances. If he's invited you, it's for a reason. All I would say is, wear your sexiest undies." She wouldn't elaborate further but as soon as we were back at her house in Chelsea she led me up to bed and initiated an encounter as aggressive as anything I had experienced from her for a long while, a sure indication of how much her libido was responding to whatever was in store. Pleasantly sore when it was over, I left the bathroom to Fay and escaped to my little office. The computer showed me something I should have remembered: Sir Bernard was a B.

Fay's car was more modest than her erstwhile official limousine but it was luxurious enough and she still liked to have me drive her. Soon after seven the following Friday evening, fifty miles out into rural Hampshire I parked outside an imposing Georgian mansion. By the time we had collected our bags from the boot, Sir Bernard, casually dressed in corduroy trousers and a plaid shirt, was waiting for us at the door. "Come in," he said, waving us through. "I'll show you your rooms in case you need them, then you can grab a drink. The staff have got the week-end off." 

We mounted a broad staircase, Fay leading, Sir Bernard bringing up the rear. The hand that alighted on my bottom and squeezed was no accident. Fay and I had adjoining identical guest rooms. Sir Bernard saw us in, then said, "You'll probably need fifteen minutes to freshen up, but don't take too long. I'll come and find you when your ready. I've already started warming Betty up but she's dying for you to join the fun." After he had disappeared back downstairs, Fay raised her eyebrows and said, "Well, I did warn you."

Ten minutes later, after I'd had time to do no more than take a quick pee, wash my hands and brush my hair, Sir Bernard was knocking at my door. "Ready?" he called, and without waiting for an invitation, walked in. He had shed his shirt and trousers in favour of a gown which was open at the front and didn't conceal a cock that stood out at right angles. As you can see," he said, waving it with one hand, "we're completely informal here. You call me Bernard and the wife is Betty. Fay knows the way so she's gone on ahead. Come on, I'll show you our little play den."

On the ground floor, he led the way to a door which opened to reveal a flight of carpeted stairs leading down. "Used to be part of the wine cellar until I had it partitioned off. Keep the door locked, normally, Let the staff believe it's where the most valuable wines are stored. Fortunately, it's soundproof."

The room was large. Its centre piece was a double bed. There were mirrors on two walls, chairs, a padded bench like a vaulting horse, vertical bars on one wall. A large cabinet held wine and spirits bottles. On a sideboard was a range of sex aids, prophylactics and lubricants. I took all this in gradually and peripherally because the action had already begun. A naked woman of indeterminate age was bent over the bench, her ankles tied with silk cords to the legs on one side, her wrists on the other. Long dark hair fell forward, obscuring her face. 

This, of course was Betty. Later, when I came to know her as intimately as I knew Fay, I learned that she was fifty-three but looked ten years younger. Her body was firm with large round breasts. Her libido was strong to the point that I never discovered whether she preferred the active or passive role; she embraced both with fervour and perceptive imagination. In fact, with Betty, I even came to enjoy submitting to a firmly wielded strap-on. On this occasion, Fay, wearing only lemon-coloured bra and knickers, was kneeling behind her, parting the woman's buttocks with her hands and applying her tongue to the aperture between.

"That's Betty," said Bernard casually. "I'll introduce you properly when there's a chance. The thing is, I'd already got her started and she and Fay are always like this. Can't wait to get at each other. When she's come a couple of times, it'll quieten down." He looked me over, unabashed, taking me in from head to foot. "Very nice. I'm glad I asked Fay to bring you. Always good to have a new body. But you're somewhat overdressed, I think."

I have to admit, though it embarrasses me to recall it now, I was already caught up in the heady aura of imminent depravity: Betty's loud moanings as she was serviced by Fay's tongue; Bernard's protuberant cock, which was undeniably big and which he was stroking casually with his left hand; not to mention all the surrounding apparatus. With a boldness that I could scarcely believe, I said, "Shall I take them off, or will you?"

"Why don't you? I shall enjoy watching." He dropped into a chair and lay back, letting his gown fall open while he continued to massage the purple-headed weapon that was the object of my attention. I shed my dress and drew a nod of approval. "Perfect. Black knickers, suspenders, black stockings. Did Fay tell you to do that?"

I smiled noncommittally, hoping to suggest that sexy lingerie was my daily habit. The bra came off. It was really not much more than decoration anyway. I massaged the nipples until they stood out. This couldn't be me, I kept thinking, behaving so brazenly in front of a tycoon I had previously met on only a handful of formal occasions. Yet I was not acting provocatively just because it seemed to be what the occasion demanded, I was turned on by doing so. When Bernard beckoned me to him, I walked the few paces backwards, letting him enjoy the sight of my bottom, its curves emphasised by black silk. I felt the hand that wasn't attending to his cock trace a line down until it reached my arsehole. A finger probed. I parted my legs. Bernard searched further, found wetness. He sighed in contented anticipation but the sound was suddenly eclipsed by a long, loud moan from Betty. I looked and saw that Fay had brought her to orgasm, fingers supplementing that cunning tongue.

My expectation that I would then be introduced to Betty wasn't to be. No sooner had Fay released her partner's wrists and ankles than the two women threw themselves on to the bed. Betty dived between Fay's legs. Bernard, following my look, said, "Leave them to it. Come and sit on me. But let me take these off first."

His removal of my knickers was a masterpiece of prevarication: a small tug here, a finger inside the waistband there, each movement an excuse to explore the orifices slowly being revealed. After he had at last allowed the garment to slide to my ankles so I could kick it off, he used both hands on my waist to pull me towards him. I realised he wanted me to be able to still see Fay and Betty while he and I were coupled. Cautious of that oversized instrument, I reached between my legs to grasp the shaft and guide it into me a little at a time. When I eventually felt confident enough to subside on to it fully, I felt an extraordinary thrill seize my whole body. The reaction was as much mental as physical: a result of the total novelty for me of being fucked in this position while a few feet away two women writhed in what had become a sixty-nine of voluptuous carnality.




In Memoriam



"Move, Pam," said Bernard, and I began to do so, sliding up and down on that hungry pole now slippery with my juices. "Go faster, I can cope." He reached a hand round to search for my clitoris, found it, fastened on to it as I rode. We found a rhythm that seemed to work for us both. I had no idea how good his control would be but his breathing was easy and regular, allowing him to murmur frequent soft words of encouragement. He wasn't shy with his vocabulary, either; perhaps when you are the big boss in the workplace and master in the home, you don't need to watch your language. "Nice cunt, Pam," he said. "Smooth. Good grip. Fay said you knew how to fuck and she wasn't wrong. But I bet you haven't had something like this up you very often."

Though this was further indication that Fay had set up this whole encounter, I was past caring. I knew I was coping well with taking his cock but sooner or later his persistent manipulation of my clit was going to be decisive. And it was."I shall come," I cried, ecstatic now with the combination of penetration and external stimulation.

"Good, good." Bernard somehow maintained his pressure on my little button while wrapping his other arm round me to keep us in contact. Several times it seemed his cock must slip out but whenever I sensed impending disaster, I managed to plunge down and bury him inside me again. "My God," Bernard exclaimed, "You are just magnificent. Now let me feel you come."

Betty, who was the top half of the sixty-nine with Fay, lifted her head at the sound of her husband's voice and immediately rolled off. "Look at this, Fay," she said, tugging my employer round to watch. 

There was no question of my having a choice, Bernard was rapidly bringing me to the boil and the two women looking on with lascivious eyes did the rest. I drove myself down on Bernard's rampant cock, held myself there, leaned back against him for the support I knew I would need when the moment arrived, and let his fingers do the rest. Something told me I should have resented the way Fay had manoeuvred me into this situation, but so shattering was the orgasm that wracked my entire being I could only be grateful.

To describe all the events that followed during that weekend would be beyond me. So many orgasms, so many couplings, male and female, female and female, have merged into a happy blur in memory. I do recall an occasion when we were all four involved together. Betty was on her back on the bed. I was kneeling astride her face, dipping down from time to time to let her tongue explore my pussy, which I kept alive otherwise with my fingers. Fay was kneeling, licking Betty. Bernard was standing behind Fay, vigorously ploughing her with his cock, which retained an astonishing firmness throughout the time we were there. 

We had agreed to see if we could contrive four simultaneous orgasms. Of course, it was impossible, but we came reasonably close. I was the last to come, having been in more or less complete control with my fingers. When Bernard gave a great groan and cried out, "I'm done for," and pulled out his cock to send a huge jet of sperm along Fay's back, I let myself go, too, and collapsed on to three heaving bodies. The recuperation after that wasn't quick but the sexual chemistry between the four of us was so powerful it only needed one of us to make a move and the whole tinder box was in flames yet again.

Needless to say, Fay's enrolment on to Sir Bernard's Board of Directors was rubber stamped; my guess is that it had been agreed in advance, anyway, and was merely the ploy to enlist my presence. When we left, Bernard made us promise we would return. We did, at irregular intervals over several years until Fay's death. Sometimes it was for a long weekend, sometimes just for an evening. Always, we tried the simultaneous orgasm trick but never made it work. In fact, nothing ever quite equalled the extraordinary mix of spontaneity and stamina of that first occasion, but I have to say that I never came away disappointed.

****************

The service ended and we rose to filter from the church. Music was playing. I recognised the slow movement of Schubert's String Quintet, music that reaches into the very depths of grief. It may have moved some who heard it there but I knew such sublime emotion was uncalled for: in all the years I knew her, Fay never gave herself emotionally to anyone. I gained much from knowing her but I was always aware of the calculating mind behind everything she did.

Outside the church the air was warm with autumn sunshine. I stood for a while on the steps watching the congregation disperse and reliving a few memories. A hand touched my arm. I turned to see Sir Bernard and Lady Betty in their elegant dark attire, carefully appropriate to the occasion. That is, as long as you had not seen them, as I had, in the throes of sexual excess with the dear departed.

"So sad," said Betty. "You will miss her."

Bernard coughed, indicating the chauffeur who was holding open the door of their Rolls. He offered a few platitudes about having to draw a line, time to move on, as though his company had just marked the retirement of its senior accountant. "Anyway," said over his shoulder as they departed, "you'll still come and see us, won't you? It's what she would have wanted. I'm sure we could invite someone else, if you'd like that."

What she would have wanted. It's the phrase those who are left behind always use to justify doing what they themselves want. I called after Sir Bernard that I would think about it. And I will. In a few days I will call them and tell them what I have decided. 



In Memorium...Aunt Jane



This story fits in the 'Loving Wives', 'Cross-dressing', 'Interracial Love', 'Erotic Couplings', 'Gay Male', 'Mature', and 'Romance' Categories and possibly others as well.



My name is John Murphy and the most influential person in my whole life was my aunt Jane. Actually she was not related to me. She was my mother's best friend. My father was a Naval Officer; he was a Naval Academy graduate. His best friend and roommate from the Academy was Charles Black. Charlie's wife was Aunt Jane. She and my mother were very, very, good friends. Aunt Jane was born and raised on her family estate and working farm just outside of Annapolis, Maryland. Her Grandfather had founded what was now the largest privately owned Bank in the Maryland.

Whenever possible our families got together. One of the best times I can remember was when Charlie and my father were both assigned to the Post-Graduate School at the Academy in the late 1930's. We lived on the Estate in the huge old mansion. It was wonderful. Aunt Jane had inherited the estate and farm and had the house renovated and modernized. There were several apartments and suites in the huge house. 

My mother was a coalminer's daughter from West Virginia and Dad was from a poor family in Virginia, they had never lived as luxuriously as we did on the farm. Mom was about 6 or 8 years older than Aunt Jane but they loved each other and got along famously. They were as close as any sisters could be. They were both beautiful women. Mom was taller at 5' 6", while Aunt Jane was a tiny 5 footer. They were both fashion conscious and dressed very well. 

I was Aunt Jane's favorite, she adored me. She was unable to have children and lavished her attentions on me. The families lived together for two years until the men were reassigned. We moved to California and then to Washington, D.C.. Washington was only a few miles from Annapolis so we spent a lot of time there when we could. We all had rooms at Aunt Jane's house.

Dad's next assignment was to Bremerton, Washington. Then we went to Long Beach., California, then to Boston, Mass and then back to Vallejo, California. When WWII started we were in Washington, D.C. again. Dad was soon ordered to sea as captain of a Destroyer, and Aunt Jane insisted Mom, my brother, sister, and I stay with her while he was gone. Charlie Black was at sea too and we felt right at home. 

Mom followed the ship from place to place. Mom would receive a message that Dad was going to be in port for a week in Boston, Portland, Maine or Baltimore and she would grab my sister and be gone. My brother was in the Naval Academy, and I stayed with Aunt Jane. This was during the battle for the North Atlantic and Dad was now commanding a division of three destroyers. He sunk a German sub while escorting merchant Convoys across the ocean to Europe. When D-Day arrived he commanded a Squadron of 12 destroyers.

As the war wound down I was placed in a Military School in Laurel, Maryland. I spent some weekends and all vacations with Aunt Jane. The summer of my 18th year was spent with Aunt Jane. She was lonely because her husband, Charlie, had been killed in the war.

One evening Aunt Jane asked me to sleep in bed with her because she was lonesome. Now, I had slept in Aunt Jane's bed many times as a child but I was now a horny teen ager. My hormones were churning full blast.

Aunt Jane wore a lovely nightgown to bed and I couldn't hide my erection in my pajamas. She smiled at me, "My goodness, do I cause that? Let me see it. "WOW! Look at you, you are really a man now." She pulled me into her arms and held me tight. I didn't know what to do, it felt so darned good in her arms, her perfume was intoxicating, but I knew the slippery stuff was leaking from my cock. I didn't want to make a mess in her bed so I told her about it. She had to look again, her little hand grasped my cock and stroked it gently. She looked up and smiled, "Will you let me take care of that for you, Honey." I gulped and nodded, then watched as she lowered her mouth over my penis. Her soft, lip-stick coated lips kissed the head of my cock and then slipped over the tip to engulf the whole top half. Her bright green eyes were locked on mine while she sucked as she lifted and dropped her head again and again, while her tongue swirled around.

It was only a few seconds before I felt my cock explode, pumping Aunt Jane's mouth full of my white gooey stuff.

She held my face gently and pressed her lips to mine, her lips opened and she pushed some goo into my mouth. Jane pulled back, a small smile crinkled the corners of her mouth. "I love you my sweet baby boy. We are now lovers and I have much to teach you so that we can please each other. I love you above all others, and even though you are young, you are forever my man. You are not yet fully developed physically but that doesn't matter. If you find me with another man or woman, you need only to beckon to me with your finger and I will always leave them for you, no matter who they are. You are my god given mate forever. I love you."

I stammered something back, pledging my undying love for her. We cuddled together on her big bed, she took my hand and moved it over her body to rest on her breast. "These are my breasts and nipples. They are called a number of names, breasts, boobs, knockers and other names. They are sensitive and I love for you to caress and play with them. My nipples are very sensitive and I love to have them sucked on. Go ahead and nurse at one, you will love the way they feel. Mmmm, Yes Dear, that is very good. That is great when you suck and lick one and play with the other with your hand. You are making me wet."

I looked up, "Wet?"

"Yes Dear, wet with my body's natural lubricants it produces when I am sexually aroused. Oh! Honey you are a fast learner. Move your hand down here and feel how wet I am. This area is called my 'pussy', it is the new home for your cock. Move down between my legs. Good. I have a grip on your beautiful cock and you just move to follow where I lead you.

"Now, see how I open my legs to show you the hole inside. I want you to move closer and put the head of your cock into my hole. Ummmungh! You loved the way that feels don't you. Yes Dear, move your cock in and out to see what feels best to you. Ahhhah! Yesss, my sweet love, you are a fast learner. Change how fast you go. Oh! I think you are just fucking me as fast and hard as you can. Fuck me! Fuck me hard. Yes, just like that! Oh God, you feel better than I had dared dream. Ahhh, yesss, I feel you cumming inside me, I love to feel that. Hold me tight and don't move."

She gently kissed my lips, her tongue slipping inside to softly explore my mouth. She kissed my eyes and whispered little things about how much she loved and worshiped me. It was very erotic and heady stuff for an 18 year old, head over heels in love with a beautiful mature woman. I was totally in her spell and it was exactly where I wanted to be. At this time my adolescent growth spurt had not yet happened and I was about 5" 6" and weighed 110 pounds. I was slim and trim from running and swimming.

Aunt Jane had me stand in front of her in all my glory, she smiled, "Perfect, you are just perfect for some games I love to play. Your beard is very light. Your face hasn't lost its smoothness. You are quite lovely. Now turn around for me. Oh! Dear! Your cock just drives me crazy, you are fully grown there, come let me show you some other ways to enjoy each other." She told me to crawl down between her legs so she could teach me about pussies. 

She spread her legs and gave me a lesson on the names of all the parts, she made me touch and lick each part. My cock was fully erect and she giggled, "I know what he wants, but until you lick me out good and get me really hot you are not going to get it." I tried to remember everything she taught me and buried my face in her pussy. I sucked in the thin delicate lips and played with them in my mouth, sucking, licking and lapping them until Jane moaned and pulled my face deeper and I licked around the entrance to her hole, running my tongue as deep as it would go into her juicy hot tunnel. I loved the taste of her fluids, pungent but sweet. Her juices were flowing a little more freely now and I learned that sucking on her clit increased the flow.

Aunt Jane pulled my head up and she stared at me, "GOD! You are so damned good, now I need you to fuck me hard. RIGHT NOW!" She rolled me on my back and straddled my slim body. Jane sat erect and pulled her gown over her head and tossed it. She raised herself over my cock and settled downward on my cock. Her hand held me up and guided him inside her wet hot pussy. I liked it. She slowly started to raise up and down over him. The feeling was extreme, I knew I would cum in a second. Auntie was watching me and knew I was going to cum. She leaned away and got something from her bed stand, I couldn't see what she had. She lifted off of me and smiled, "I have a gadget here that will let us have fun longer, it is a cock ring. It goes around the base of your cock and balls and keeps you hard longer and you can fuck longer. You will love it. Now, John, you be still while I adjust it for your size. There! That looks right, how does it feel?"

"Oh, Aunt Jane, it feels good. I like it."

"Good sweetie, now that we are lovers you may call me just Jane, or any pet name you like. Now let me get on top of you again, do you like that?"

"Yes, Sweet Jane, I sure do like it." 

Jane mounted me again and my cock felt bigger and harder than ever. She smiled lovingly as she bounced up and down on my cock. She held her breasts to keep them from bouncing too much. Jane leaned forward and stopped moving to let me suck a hard rubbery nipple. I sucked it right in and part of the breast too! I felt her shiver and asked what was wrong, "Nothing, dear, sweet, boy. You just made me cum, a good one too! I love it, I wasn't expecting it, that is the best kind. Are you ready Honey?"

"No Jane, I am fine, I just want to please you."

Jane stopped her movements and placed a little hand on each side of my face, "Oh, sweet boy, love of my life, you please me more than I can believe. Love with you takes me to new heights, way beyond anything I have had before. Now I need to make you cum. Do you want the cock ring off?"

"No, you put it on me, you say when it comes off."

Jane twisted around and lowered her pussy over my face, it was drooling a little and I slurped the fluids in. She shivered again and grabbed my cock and licked around the head before she sucked it in to the hilt. Wow! How could she do that? I didn't know, but I did know I loved it. Her head bobbed on my cock and I knew that this was going to be special. She ran her parted lips and tongue along the length of my cock, then at the base she licked on my scrotum, sucking each ball gently. Then she licked down and speared her pointed tongue into my asshole. She repeated this several times and the pressure in my balls was unbelievable. Jane twisted around again and I looked in her eyes as she loved my cock, she worshiped my cock, kissing and mewing deep in her throat as she kissed and licked, then started over again. Suddenly I knew I was about to cum, I stiffened and said "I'm cumming, I saw her enclose the head of my cock in her mouth, she smiled as I shot a massive load of cum into her beautiful mouth. Her eyes twinkled and the corners of her sweet lips curved up as her mouth filled with my seed. When I was through, she slithered up my body and pressed her lips to mine in a sweet gentle kiss. 

I expected to have the cum in my mouth, but no, she slowly let it dribble from her mouth into her cupped hand. She smiled at me, "This is all mine, Lover, it is my daily facial. It keeps my skin soft and supple. I like to sleep with it on my face." She explained as she rubbed it gently into the skin of her face and upper chest. She stood and picked up her gown and put it on, she giggled and got another gown from her dresser. "Here, put this on to sleep in, it is very comfortable and it will make you dream of me tonight."

It was a lovely gown, long, with white silk and pink lace. I looked at her. She smiled gently, "I promise you will love it and I will love to snuggle and cuddle with you all night long in your sweet gown." How could I refuse anything that would please this wonderful goddess? I slipped it over my head. Wow! What a sensation as the silk gown slipped down over my body. I felt an erection growing again. I liked it. Janie giggled, "I know someone that likes how it feels. Come to me, sweetie, we will sleep for a while." Feeling our gowns glide over the other gown was as erotic as putting it on.

I loved feeling our bodies pressed together during the night. I think I had a hard-on all night. I wakened to warm sweet lips pressing against mine. I loved it. "Get up lazybones, we have things to do today." I got up, peed and brushed my teeth. I looked in the mirror at my face, I didn't need to shave. I smiled at how I looked in the gown, the shimmery material fit my hips nicely but the lace bodice looked funny being completely flat.

Back in our bedroom Jane smiled at me, "How did the gown feel Sweetie?"

I rubbed my hands up and down my flanks and then my flat belly. "I like the way it feels. It is very...sexy I guess."

"Do you like feeling 'sexy'?"

"You know I do, I think everything connected to you is sexy."

"Thank you, dear boy. Come with me, I have some things to show you." She took my hand and led me through her dressing room and into her closet. There was a door at the back of her walk-in closet. A wide hallway was ahead of us, a large window was on the right side. She stopped at the window. I looked into the master bed room. Her bed was not three feet in front of us. I looked at her, she smiled, "Charlie loved to watch me with other men. We had an open marriage, I have always had other lovers, I need more sex than one lover can give me." She pulled my face around and gently kissed my lips. "I think you are able to do it though. I haven't felt the need for more than you, my love." 

I didn't know what to think or feel. Her warm lips erased everything but thoughts of her soft body, how she feels, how she tastes, and how she sends me to heaven. I accepted whatever she said as being right for us. Nothing could cause my deep love to waver a speck. I noticed several chairs opposite the two way mirror into her room. I looked at her. "He enjoyed bringing a friend or two from time to time. Always with my permission of course."

"Can I bring someone to watch?"

"Yes Dear. That is your decision; YOU do not need my permission, because I belong to you. Charlie belonged to me." She took my hand and led me to another door at the end of the hall. She opened the door and switched on a light. It was another ladies dressing room. There was a well lit make-up table. Rows of wigs. Rack after rack of women's clothes of every description. Shelf after shelf of every kind of ladies shoes, hats, and handbags. She stopped, looked up at me. "Charlie loved to play 'dress up' with me. Would you like to try it? I think most of his things will fit you, my love. Most of it has never been worn, he was too timid to go out in his things as a woman. He was probably right, he could fool no one into thinking he was a girl. You will not go out unless you are a perfect girl. What do you think?"

I looked at her and saw the hope in her eyes; I saw love, hope, and desire. I gave the only possible answer, "I would love to try it, if you think it would please us."

"Sweetie, I think you will love it, I promise that in any of our games I will never do one thing to hurt or embarrass you in any way. Charlie loved to be humiliated and hurt. I do not enjoy doing or watching that. In anything we ever do my love, you are in command. All you need to do is say 'stop'. Everything will stop until you are happy. OK?"

Jane led me out the back of the dressing room and I found myself in my own bedroom closet. She laughed at the expression on my face. Sweet baby boy, please take off the gown and give it to me. Then shave your face and your legs and I'll meet you in Charlie's dressing room in a little while.

I did as I was told and put on a light bath robe and joined her in the dressing room. She looked up from a small pile of clothes on the counter. She walked to me and took my hand. "Come with me Sweetie, I know you cannot try on girl's clothes with a hard-on. Let's jump in bed and get rid of the problem." Jane pulled her gown over her head and grabbed my hand and pulled me on the bed. We reclined on the bed and kissed and caressed each other. I ran my hands over her sweet body, gently touching, softly rubbing, and then tenderly kissing all of her sensitive places. I slipped my hand from her neck, over her breasts, down her slightly curved belly, then cupped her mound, slipping a finger inside her. She was only a little moist, not wet. I put two fingers in her and went a little deeper. 

Jane whispered, "Mmmm, that is good, Honey, I love to feel your fingers in my pussy. Play with my clitty too, Sugar. That's right. You are so sweet and gentle when you do that, I love your loving, I think I am wet enough now Lover, put that wonderful cock inside me. OH YES! Easy, now you are all the way in. Damn but you feel good." She started moving against my thrusts and our pelvic areas thumped together time after time. Suddenly she held my hips. I looked at her, she grinned, "I want you behind me, then you can fuck as hard and fast as you want."

She got up on all fours and I moved behind her, my cock slipped in easily. It was good. I started slowly, the feeling was a little different, I liked it. I went a little faster, that was better. Then I got into my rhythm. WOW! That was even better. I was thrusting as deep as possible, pausing at the bottom of the thrust and giving short hard rooting thrusts to get deeper. Jane was grunting with each thrust and began moving her hips up and down a little bit, changing the angle of penetration each time I thrust up inside her. Delightful! I was going to shoot my load soon. We were slapping loudly when we bumped together on each wonderful thrust. I held her hips and yanked her back into me as I thrust forward thumping her hard. I felt the pressure build to a point when there was no stopping, Jane was screaming and so was I. I came so hard I could just gently pump in and out, my head thrown back, then forward and spewing my issue deep inside her. I collapsed beside her and she snuggled into my side softly whimpering. I caught my breath, "Did I hurt you Jane? Are you all right?"

"OH! My sweet baby boy, you are so damned good, so much better than men much older than you are, this is really only about your sixth time and you take me where I have seldom been. I can't wait until you really get going. I can't remember when I have been so thoroughly and completely fucked. I just wanted to get you off so you didn't have a constant hard-on. Now we need to rest for a while."

I dozed off for a while and woke to find Jane beside me. She was staring at me. She softly kissed my lips. She. whispered, "John, Darling, you are my true love forever and ever." She placed a little finger against my lips, "No Dear, you don't have to say a word, I know you love me too. Let's go play 'dress up'."

She led me to the hidden dressing room again. She smiled, "I don't think we will be going out today so we will just experiment a little bit to see how you look. OK?" I nodded and she handed me what appeared to be a fancy jockstrap with a flat lace panel instead of a cup. I stepped into it and Jane told me to pull it up until it was just below my cock. She directed me to spread my legs a little, she reached between my legs and pressed both of my balls upward against my pelvis, I felt one, then the other slip up into a hole in the bone. She pulled my cock and the scrotum up over my balls. She said, "Sweetie, pull the gaff up tight between your legs to hold everything in place. Oh! Beautiful, you look positively girlish down there now! Here, slip on these panties."




In Memorium...Aunt Jane



I looked down and stepped into the pink lace and satin panties. I pulled them up and they fit snuggly. They felt nice against my skin. "Now for a bra!" said my sweet lover. "Here try this one, it matches the panties. Your tities are already in it. Giggle! They are bags of flax seed, they will move with you when you move. They look like real breasts. Oh, here I need to adjust the shoulder straps, there, how does that feel?" It felt strange, I reached up and cupped them with my hands, slightly lifting them. In my hands they felt like some other girls breasts, warm, soft and yet firm. On my chest they felt weird. Looking down they looked as if they belonged there. I glanced at a mirror and did a double take. I had a nice looking girl's body. I leaned forward and the breasts slightly changed their shape very realistically. Humm! This might be fun.

Jane looked me up and down, "Wonderful, let's see, you need a light tan stocking with your sundress. Do you know how to put these on? No! Let me show you. You take one from the package and stretch it out, see! Now these are seamed stockings, meaning they have a seam down the back of the stocking. First let's put a garter belt on because a girdle is too hot for today. This pink one will do. Now, we hold the stocking top open with our thumbs and gather the rest of it down toward the toe in a shape of a donut like this. Now, point your toes and pull the stocking over your foot keeping the seam straight under your foot to come out on the center of your heel. Good girl! Now pull the stocking up your leg feeling with your finger tips to keep the seam in the center of the back of your leg. Smooth the stocking as you go, good. Now we take the garter straps and fasten them to the stocking, see how they work? The little mushroom shaped rubber part goes under the top of the stocking, great, now put the large part of the metal clip over the mushroom and pull up on it, good, you got it. Ok! Now adjust the length or tightness of the strap, lift this tab and tighten or loosen the strap, there that is about right. Now you do the other one. Gee, Honey, You are a natural. Don't you love how they feel?"

"Yeah! It sure does feel different, what's next?" She handed me a lace trimmed white slip, then helped me put it on. Jane held up a yellow and white print cotton sun dress. She said, "Raise your arms and I'll help you get into this little dress, It should be cute on you. She put the cloud of material over my head and helped me find the neck and the sleeves. It settled into place and went tight around my middle when she pulled up the zipper. Jane pulled me around and said, "Don't look yet, let me put a wig and a touch of make-up on you first." She pulled me over to the dressing table and started looking through the cosmetics arrayed there. She looked up at me, "Oh no! These won't do. Charlie was much darker than you are. Come with me and bring this wig."

In Jane's rooms she sat me at her table, my back to the mirror. She looked carefully at my face, picked up some tweezers and started plucking eyebrow hairs. I didn't say a word, she was concentrating on her work. She looked carefully at me again and opened a small jar and wiped parts of my face with a small thing that looked like a little sponge. She brushed a small brush over my eye lids and then below my eye brows. A larger brush glided over my cheeks and faintly along my jaws. Lipstick was last before she placed the wig over my head. She fussed with the wig, pinning it to my own hair, then gently brushing it smooth.

Aunt Jane stepped back and looked at me. She walked around me, adjusting my dress, kneeling to strap white sandals with low heels on my feet, and gently pushing a stray hair or two back into place. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Niece Joan, turn around and look at yourself." As I turned I couldn't believe what I saw, a very pretty and cute young lady looking back at me. Her hair was in a pageboy style with bangs. I had to touch my face before I convinced myself that the girl was me. Jane stood beside me and smiled up at me. 'Do you think you can pass as a girl now?"

"Yes, I sure look like a pretty girl, but can I sound or act like one?"

"I don't know girl, Try and walk in those low heels. Hey! That's pretty good. Keep walking while I go get some a little higher." Jane returned and sat on a low stool and had me place a foot in her lap. She changed my shoes, these were different, they were yellow with much taller heels. I stood and looked at myself, the higher heels made me stand differently. My shoulders moved back a bit for better balance, this pushed my breasts out further. Now I was not so much cute as I was sexy.

I heard Jane. "Put a little sway in your hips as you walk and try to put one foot directly in front of the other. Woah! Too much! There, that's better. Walk around like that until it is second nature to you. Are you sure you have never done this before?"

"Yes, I mean, no. I have never done this before, but I have watched the way you walk for a long time. I imitate you, Auntie Jane." 

She grinned at me, "You sound better now too. Can you talk in that voice every time you speak?"

I spoke for a bit and found that raising my voice pitch just a little and slowing my rate of speaking made me sound like a sweet southern girl. Jane clapped her hands, "Girl, I'll take you anywhere with me after a little more practice. I want to make girl on girl love with you right now."

I tried to look shocked, "Why Mrs. Black, what has come over you, I am shocked you would suggest that to a young married woman like myself. That is just disgusting."

Jane stared at me, then burst into gales of laughter. She shook her lovely head, "Perfect, just perfect. I think you are really a girl. I have an idea, we are going to the Naval Academy Officers Club for lunch. It will be such fun. You practice your walking while I run and put on a sundress too."

Jane came back in a dress similar to mine only in white and blue. She wore blue heels and had on a wide brimmed sunhat. She handed me a yellow purse and a white sunhat with a yellow bow with long ribbons down the back. Her hat had a blue bow. She applied a perfume on my chest, wrists, and behind my ears. She handed me a pair of little white mesh and lace gloves remarking that proper ladies were never seen outside without a hat and gloves.

Aunt Jane's Rolls limo waited just outside the front door. The chauffer, a black man called Jessup, helped us in the big old car. He was in uniform and the vehicle was spotless, without a speck of dust. It seemed to glide silently down the long drive to the road to Annapolis. The car had the proper sticker and we were waved through the gate to the Naval Academy. We saw units of young Midshipmen running here and there in formation. Jane explained that these were the new class of freshmen or plebes.

I carefully exited the car with Jessup's strong hand assisting me. I glanced down and quickly straightened my skirts. Jane took my hand and led me up the steps to the Club. A waiter showed us to a table on a shaded patio. It was quite cool and comfortable there. I followed Jane's lead as she daintily removed her gloves and put them in her purse. It was the first time I had looked in mine and the first thing I saw was a Kotex pad. I hurriedly snapped the purse shut. I looked up into Jane's smiling eyes, she leaned towards me and whispered, "A lady must always be prepared, Dear." 

I rolled my eyes and giggled, "Yes, Auntie, Dear."

She grinned back, looking into my eyes, "You are an adorable girl, Sweetie."

A pair of ladies stopped by and greeted Jane very happily. Jane introduced me as her niece Joan. They joined us at our table and I was led into several conversations with the ladies. I answered their questions quite truthfully carefully changing my normal gender when necessary. Most of the conversation was about people I didn't know so I just listened attentively. Several officers in uniform stopped at the table and spoke with the ladies. There was some light discrete flirting and one tall handsome Commander took my hand when we were introduced. He gently turned it over and softly kissed the back . I smiled quite coyly and murmured, "I am pleased to meet you , Sir, you are quite gallant." 

I saw Jane cover her mouth with her hand as her eyes blinked. The officer leaned close to my ear and softly asked if I would care to dance. I had never danced as a female and never in heels and I looked into his eyes and said. "Thank you, Sir, but my husband doesn't permit me to dance with anyone when he is not present and gives his permission, he is not here currently so I must decline your gracious offer."

Aunt Jane, smiled at the officer, "Frank, leave my sweet, beautiful, young niece alone. She is about your daughter's age you know. Her hubby was a Notre Dame football player, he stands 6 foot 5 and weigh 280 pounds. We try very hard to not upset him. He is ultra possessive of his wife. Be a good boy and run along now."

When he left the ladies giggled and laughed saying that he thought he was god's gift to women. One said she played bridge with his wife who said he was only so-so in bed. We all giggled again. 

Lunch was nice and I carefully took dainty little bites from my sandwiches. I emulated everything Jane did. When we were through and were safely in the limo we had a fit of laughing about our adventure. Jane hugged me and kissed me. "Miss Joan, my dearest sweet girl, I think we need to get you married." She picked up the speaking tube to the driver and pulled a cord that rang a bell in the driver's compartment. She directed him to go to a jewelry store. We went in and she selected a engagement/wedding ring set. When we were once more in the car she pulled me close and tenderly kissed my lips. She took my left hand and slipped the two rings on my finger. She looked into my eyes, "Joanie, you are now my sweet wife, I love you."

We continued our dress-up game for another week then Jane said, "Honey, you are a perfect young wife now. I defy anyone to tell you are not a female without a medical examination. I think we need to go on a shopping trip to New York. We can get some delightful fall things for you; I want to see you in some suits, furs, boots and really daring lingerie. There are some French lines that are unbelievably sexy, all sheer, lacey and frilly. I want some too! Everything is ready, we leave in the morning."

The farm had its own airstrip so we boarded Jane's private twin engine Beechcraft in the morning. After a three hour ride we took a cab to the Waldorf Astoria Hotel, we went to our room and freshened up a bit before had lunch and then went shopping. A driver met us there with a limo and spent the day carrying packages back to the car all afternoon. We were loaded with pretty things. We went back to the Waldorf for a nap before we were to meet friends of Jane's for Dinner. We dressed in lovely cocktail dresses for dinner. Mine was black and was skin tight to below the hips where it spread to a wide skirt that stopped at the knee. Very daring for 1944. Jane said that skirts were rising. Then she grinned at me, "My skirts have not been rising very much since we became lovers. I don't mind though as long as I have my sweet Joanie."

There was a knock on the door and Jane answered it. A large grinning man swept her into his arms and kissed her passionately. Another man, younger, perhaps in his late twenties, walked to me. He has a nice smile, "Let me introduce myself, You must be Joan, I am Roy, your date for tonight." 

I looked at Jane, she was still kissing her friend, his hands were all over her. I looked coolly at Roy, "Don't get any ideas, I am not a slut like my dear aunt, sit down and relax, I think they will find the bedroom soon."

Jane shoved her friend back so hard he fell in the chair by the door, he stood and said, "Aren't you glad to see me?"

She walked close to him and said in a strong voice. "I told you what I wanted tonight. If you can't follow directions get your ass the hell out of here. You have embarrassed me in front of my niece. I won't stand for that."

The man blanched, "I am very sorry, I thought. . . ."

"No Harry, you didn't think. Are you ready to do exactly as you are told?"

"Yes Ma'am, I am sorry I embarrassed you. I will behave." She turned to me, her face softened, "Sweetie are you alright?"

"I don't know Jane, what is going on here?"

"Darling, I wanted you to have some new experiences tonight." She looked down, "I wanted you to have a man make love to you. I was afraid you would object if it didn't develop naturally. Then this big clown has to come on like gang-busters."

"Do they know about me?"

"Yes, you are Roy's favorite kind of girl."

"You didn't think I could attract a man on my own?"

"Oh God no. We both know you can have any man you want in your bed in seconds, but you don't know how he will react when he finds out you are another man. I am afraid you might get hurt, I couldn't stand that."

I walked to her and looked in her green eyes, "Sugar, I love you, we will do it your way. Next time let me know what you plan for me."

"Oh Baby, I will, I will."

We went out to dinner in the hotel dinning room. It was fun, I danced with Roy several times and with Frank once. When my dance with Frank ended he leaned down and whispered, "Honey, you are so sweet and beautiful I would love to fuck you even if you are a guy."

I looked up at him and smiled, "We'll see about that." After on last dance with our dates we went back to the suite. Jane pulled me into the bathroom, she hugged me tight and looked at me. "Are you ready for this. I know this sounds crazy, but I want to be with you on your first time. I have to be sure you want it and don't get hurt. Do not do it just because you think it is what I want you to do."

I hugged her back, "Sweetheart, I think this is something I need to do. For me! It will not happen if you are not holding my hand."

Jane burst into tears. She kissed me and said, "You always do the right thing, I am learning about true love from YOU!"

Jane put on the radio in the living room and found some slow dreamy dance music. Roy and I danced holding each other closely. He gently kissed me, I liked it. I kissed back and opened my mouth. His tongue hunted for my tonsils, at least that is how it felt. His kisses were more aggressive than Jane's. His hands caressed my body through the tight dress I felt him pull the zipper slowly down my back. His hands cupped my ass, I liked it. I glanced at Jane, she was watching us as Frank sucked on her breasts. She smiled. I shifted and beckoned her to me. She whispered to Frank and stood and dropped her dress to the floor. In just her panties, garter belt and stockings she came to me and waited. 

I turned and said, "Jane, please help me get my dress off. It's in the way now." She helped me pull my arms from the long tight sleeves. Then we lifted it up over my head. I decided to leave the bra on. I was wearing a half slip too and stepped out of it. I slipped off my shoes and crawled on the bed. I turned on my back and a nude Roy joined me. Roy kissed me again, his hands roaming my body. I looked for Jane, she was beside the bed and reached out and squeezed my hand. A tear ran down my cheek, I mouthed, "I wanted it to be you."

Jane smiled and pointed between her legs, "No cock." She mouthed. Roy twisted down and pulled down my panties. He removed the gaff and gently released my cock and pulled the scrotum so my balls fell out. That felt good. My cock had been trying to get hard for an hour or more. Roy's mouth closed over my cock and I reached for his cock. It was long, very long, but not very thick. I stroked it and it got very hard. I scooted around to where I could kiss his cock too. Jane's face was right down there with me. I could see that Frank was fucking her from behind. I looked at Roy's cock very carefully, it was the first one I had ever seen or felt, other than my own.

I opened my mouth and took it in. I liked it. I knew what I liked and gave it to his cock. After a few minutes Roy pulled away. He looked down at me, "God you are good, I can usually last for almost an hour but you have me ready to cum in five minutes. I want to fuck you now if it's OK?"

I smiled, "How do you want me, Roy?"

"On your back, Honey, I can watch your face and be sure I am not hurting you, I have done a lot of virgins and have never hurt anyone." He said something to Jane and she handed him a small jar of Vaseline. He opened it and crawled between my stockinged legs. He dipped a finger in the jar and pulled out a gob of the pale amber jelly. I watched as he inserted the finger in my ass hole. He said, "Relax Sweetie, it will feel good soon."

Hey, it felt good then, I liked it. He added more lube and then covered his cock with Vaseline. I watch his cock approach my rectum. Then I felt it. The head slipped right in. I liked it. He slowly slipped it deeper and deeper until his pubic bone hit my ass. He was all the way in. I liked it. He slowly began his strokes, long slow strokes, nice. He leaned forward and kissed my lips with a lot of tongue, I liked it more. I put my hands on his ass and pulled him into me harder. He was damned good. I turned my head and smiled at Jane's concerned face. "I love it, my Love. Thank you."

She burst into tears, "Sniff, do you really like it?"

"Yes Sweetie, do you like it up your ass?"

"Yes I do."

"I want to do you there too, I want to please you in every way."

She giggled, "You can have me anyway you want me, but right now I want to sit on your face while you are getting fucked. Can I do that?

"Yes, hurry though, Roy is making me cum in a different way, it feels as if my whole body is cumming."

"Congratulations Sweetie, that is a female orgasm, few men ever achieve one. Right Roy?"

"I have never had one but I have given a few to guys."

The muscles in my body were tingling and I felt a huge wave of pleasure and joy sweeping through me. I saw Jane's sweet face and smiled in my ecstasy. I liked it, a lot. Then I tried clinching the muscle in my ass as he pulled out on a stroke.

After several strokes he yelped, "She is milking my cock! God this little girl is good. She is the best cock sucker and the best fuck I have ever had, male or female. Where did you ever find her?"

"Roy, you won't believe it but I raised her. She is just eighteen. She is the love of my life, I adore her with all my heart. I agree, she is by far the best lover I have ever had."

My heart leapt to hear my love's praise. I would do anything to please her. But right now another wave of orgasmic bliss flooded over me and I was consumed by jolts of sheer pleasure.

I heard my sweet love calling my name and I opened my eyes. I saw her beautiful green eyes just inches from my face."Are you alright?" she asked. 

"Sure, I'm just resting. Where is Roy?" She gently kissed me and said, "Honey, you passed out and scared us to death. Frank is a doctor and checked you out, he could find nothing wrong and thinks you just had too much sex and different sex and you just need rest. How do you feel?"

"Sweetie, I feel fine, very good in fact now that you and I are alone together again."

"I guess that bringing two guys into our sex with no warning was too much for you."

"Jane, that Roy was damned good. It was different, I now know how you feel during sex, at least I think I do. I like being fucked up my ass and I loved sucking his cock. I guess I am a queer now."

"No Honey, it it just that you are very close to being a real girl now. You are almost a girl in the way you think and react to things. Do you want to shop anymore today or do you want to go home?"

"I don't want to ruin your shopping."

"Oh Honey, you are so sweet! I got in enough shopping yesterday to last a long time. I want to be home in our own bed where we can kiss and cuddle all day long. Maybe with a tiny bit of sex now and then too."




In Memorium...Aunt Jane



"Sweetie, I know what that means, but please, just the two of us unless you ask me first."

"Yes Dearest."

We had a quiet week with sex four or five times a day. We received a jolt when my mother called and told us Dad was called for sea duty to relieve the sick Captain of a Cruiser in the Atlantic. Mom was going to move to the ship's home port of Boston and suggested she wanted to get me in a good Prep school there. My education had been rather fragmented by all the moving we did.

Aunt Jane countered by suggesting I continue to live with her and attend a local Prep school with an outstanding record. She said that staying with her was much more stable than it could possibly be chasing my Dad around. Mom cried and said she missed me. Jane said we missed the family too but we needed to do what was best for me. So it was decided , I would continue to live with Aunt Jane. After we hung up Jane and I hugged and kissed and danced around the room in our joy. In all the years I knew and loved Jane she never lost the endearing quality to appear childlike and excited about life.

Then the planning started. We had to get me a new male wardrobe. We went to Jane's regular hair dresser and had my hair styled in a short sort of pixie cut that looked cute on me but that I could comb out and part in a man's style. I was growing now and none of my old male attire would fit mow. All the fall female clothes were bought with that in mind. They all still fit with room for growth.

It was soon after we began to prepare for the school when one afternoon Jane said she had something she wanted to talk with me about. She said, "John-Joan, you know I love you with all my heart. You and I will be lovers forever. We both know that with you in school our loving will be curtailed greatly. Between school and your study time our usual five or six times a day will be impossible. 

"This is hard for me to do, I have to tell you that since we have been lovers the only other lover I have had was Frank in New York. Now I don't know how I am going to make it without sex so much of the time."

I looked in her eyes, they were full of tears. He lower lip was quivering and I knew she was going to bawl. I hugged her to me tightly, "Jane, Sweetheart, this is going to hurt me too. On my part there is nothing I can do but love you at night when we go to bed, in the morning when we get up and on weekends. I know that it will not satisfy you so you will have to find another lover. Right?"

Tears ran freely down her cheeks now. She buried her face against my chest and sobbed. After a few minutes she looked up at me, she sniffed and wiped her face with a Kleenex. "My sweet love, that is not a problem for me. I am worried about how you feel about it. I will do nothing you do not approve of or that will hurt you or hurt the love we have for each other. Your love is the most precious thing in my life; I will do nothing to jeopardize that love."

"Sweet Lady, I feel the same about you. We need to be practical here and in the future. You need other men. There may come a time in the future when we must be apart and I need another woman. On my part having sex with someone other than you will have absolutely no effect on my eternal love for you."

She stared at me for a few seconds then burst into tears again. She hugged me then looked up at me. "John, you are wise way beyond your years. Nothing can change how I love you. Let's get dressed and go out for dinner at the Club."

I grinned at her, "Do you want to go with John or Joan?"

"I want to be with Joan as much as I can before you outgrow her. We both know you are growing very fast now. When you are six feet tall and 200 pounds poor Joan will be long gone, right?"

"No Dear, Joanie will always be inside me." We dressed and Jessup took us to the Club. The young officers were very attentive to us and we danced constantly. A few were cute and I flirted a little bit, knowing it wouldn't go any further. Jane had a line of slightly older men pursuing her. We left them panting and were home before midnight. We bathed and cleaned off our make-up, carefully moisturizing afterwards. I smiled at Jane, "Did you find any new prospects for a new lover?"

Her head snapped around. She looked at me and sighed, "What am I going to do with you?" Are you going to be jealous of every man I look at?"

"Yes."

She laughed. "You are honest, I will feel the same when you find someone else. I warn you though, I will be impossible to get rid of. I need you to live. Let's get something straight, I will never look for another lover, you are my one and only lover. I will have other sex partners. That is all they will ever be, useable and expendable sex partners. Understand." 

"Do I get to approve or disapprove?"

"Do you want to?"

"I guess not, you could never find someone I would approve of."

"Don't worry dear, I have someone in mind. You will never know about him or them. They are no more than living sex toys to me."

Her statement turned out to be wrong. The third week I was in school there was a small fire at the school and we were all sent home. I caught a ride with another student and was home about ten oclock. I went to my room, changed to Joan and went to find Jane. As I went through the hall between dressing rooms I saw that Jane had company. Two very muscular and well endowed black men were with her. One had his huge black cock in her pussy as she kneeled before another black man sucking on an even bigger cock. The black shiny cock had to be twice the size of my cock, it stretched Jane's pussy and the membrane of her sheath clung to the cock as it slowly withdrew, when it plunged back into her pussy the thin membrane clinging to the cock went with it. Jane' small mouth was stretched too. She was humming and slurping on that monster, she was worshiping that big black cock. I collapsed in one of the chairs. She must have heard something, She said, "You two stay here, I want to check on something," She was beside me in a moment. She was crying. "What are you doing home? Oh Dear God, You were never to see this. Do you hate me?"

I took a Kleenex and dried her tears, "No sweetheart, it just surprised me. We had a fire at school and I caught a ride with Tim." Are you going to share your guys with me, I have never been with a black guy. They have big cocks don't they?"

Jane looked in my eyes and began to smile. "You little cock whore, you just love a big black cock like I do, don't you."

"I want to find out, are they that much better than I am?"

"Hell no! It takes two to replace you my love."

"I turned and said, "I really don't think I can handle either one of them. I'll see you for dinner if you are through by then." I turned and walked away.

Jane didn't join me for dinner. I didn't bother to see if she still had company when I was ready for bed. I locked both doors to my room and slept in my own bed for the first time. I set my alarm for an hour earlier than usual and fixed my own breakfast. I caught a ride with Tim again.

When I got home the next afternoon I was met at the door by Maddie, the head housekeeper. She pulled me in the kitchen and placed a slice of my favorite pie in front of me. She wasn't wearing her usual broad smile, she softly said, "Mr. John, if you are the one causing Miss Jane to cry all day today you had better fix things pretty soon." She reached a huge arm out and brought back a big meat cleaver. "Miz Jane still cryin' tomorrow you gonna be singing high tenor in de choir from now on. You heah me Mr. John?"

"Maddie, this is none of your business. Miss Jane and I are having a little difference of opinion that will resolve itself very soon. I know of nothing I have done to hurt her in any way, I don't think she can say the same about me." She looked me in the eye, "Mr. John I believe you. Miz Jane has always been a woman who loves a lot of sex, she used to have those two boys once or twice a day when she had Mr. Charlie. She have others she use too. She don't love none of them, she only love you. Ah knows ya loves her too, just don't hurt her Please! Ah raised her from a baby, she nursed at these big titties 'cause her momma didn't have much milk.

"She is like ma own baby, Ah caint stand to see her cry. Please go kiss her and dry her tears."

I smiled at this wonderful woman, "Maddie, I promise Miz Jane will be happy again this evening if I can do it."

"Mr. John, you are a fine young man and woman, Miz Jane loves you much more than I ever seen with anyone. She just sits wit' tears runnin' down her cheeks while she stares at nothin'. Please forgive her."

"Maddie, I have forgiven her, I think she can't forgive herself."

Maddie looked at me for a long time, "Mr. John, you are a smart man fo' a man so young, I think you are right. Go help her get over it. OK?"

I kissed Maddie on the forehead and ran to find Jane. I went to my room and switched to being Joan I put on some white shorts and a little blue halter top with some blue tennies. I put a blue bow on top of my head. 

Jane was in her room sitting in her rocker. She looked up at me and I ran and plopped myself in her lap. She laughed, "I think my little girl needs some lovin'." She hugged me tight and nibbled at my earlobe with her lips. I turned and kissed her lips. She kissed me back, hard. I whispered that I loved her with every fiber of my body. She cried softly, then sniffled, she sighed, "We need to talk."

I got up and said, "Fine. Where?"

She looked at me carefully, "I hurt you a lot yesterday, didn't I?"

"Yes, but I learned something else too."

"What did you learn, my sweet love?"

"That, as a man I will never be able to compete for your love, I am at best an effeminate little fellow. There is no way I can compare with the bodies and muscles of those men, not to mention their cocks. You can only love me as a girl." I knew tears were running down my cheek, that made me angry, "SEE! I am such a sissy all I can do is cry when I get angry. I think I need to be a boy full time and work on getting ready for the Exams."

"What exams?"

"I am eligible to compete for several appointments to the Academy for next year."

"The Naval Academy?"

"Yes, and West Point too!"

"First John, we need to get one thing straight, you are not now and never will be in any kind of competition with those black studs. That is exactly what they are, studs. Like stud horses they are hired to fuck white women who need a good fucking. As I said before they are live dildos, nothing more. I often use them because I basically own them, they work for me.

"Maddie came to me many years ago and proposed I give her the names of any women I know who might want the use of a clean, discreet group of black studs. She now has over forty men working for her. It is a 'stud service' and as such is part of the farm. We provide this service for women for a hundred miles around. We have a fleet of vehicles that have changeable signs saying Plumber, Electrician, Pump Service, Painting and other things. Usually our service is provided right in the lady's home. Often the men are there to give estimates for work to be done. They do a little 'service' while they are there."

"Do you use them every day?"

"No! I had a list of young friends who would stop by once or twice a week when it was convenient for both of us. After you came into my life I didn't need them anymore. I haven't been able to get a good list going in just a few days so I had Maddie help me out." Her eyes sparkled as she said, "Are you sure you don't want to try one?"

I laughed, "As John or as Joan?"

"Charlie liked to have them fuck me. They had him prepare them by sucking their cocks and then putting that black cock in my pussy for them. They would make him lick their asses while they fucked me. Sometimes he got fucked too!"

I looked at her and said, "Is that what you want me to do?"

She looked really shocked, "NO! NEVER. Not you. Charlie loved it, he enjoyed being humiliated. I hated it! No, I thought you might want to try a really big cock while you can as Joan. But first I need something else."

"What's that?"

"Promise I won't have to sleep without you again tonight! I didn't sleep a wink last night, I am addicted to having you in my bed. I love you so!"

I grinned, "Can't Maddie get one of the studs to sleep with you?"

She jumped up, "HELL NO! I don't want to cuddle up to a black all night. I could never do that, I want MY lover. YOU, JUST YOU CAN DO THAT FOR ME! GOT IT?"

"Ah! Yes Ma'am, I'll be there, on time too! Does Maddie have any Studs a little smaller than those guys?"

"I'm sure she does. Why?"

"If you are with me, and will hold my hand, I might like to try it one time. Then you can finish him off."

Jane grinned, "No Sweetie, if you start it, you finish it. Listen, they are getting paid, they don't have to finish. If you don't cum, they don't get paid. Do you really want me to call Maddie?"

"Yes I do, tell her she owes me one." Jane turned and walked to the house phone. I heard her talking but couldn't hear what she said. Jane turned and looked at me, she said, "I agree with you Momma, John is as fine as they come, I love him to death. I don't remember a Jason but if you recommend him I am sure he will do fine." 

We talked about what we would do if I won an appointment to one of the Service Academies. She looked in my eyes, "Unless you tell me otherwise I will always be near you. I will make myself available to you somehow." There was knock at the door, Jane stepped over and opened it. A large black man entered and bowed to Jane, "Miz Jane, I am Jason, at your service." He was about six two or three. He was shaved bald and was quite handsome.

"Please strip, Jason, so we can see what we have to work with here."

Jason unbuttoned his shirt and removed it. Wow! His upper body was magnificent. He had broad shoulders and a chest that defied description. He had muscles on his muscles. His arms were massive his biceps were thicker than my thighs. He had a small waist and when he removed his pants we saw his legs were all muscle too. His cock hung down and looked to be 10 inches long soft. It was like the rest of him, beautiful.

He walked over and stood close in front of me. His cock was right in front of my face. Jane said, "Honey, you can touch it if you want to." I was mesmerized, my hand move on it's own to grasp that long thick snake. Jason stepped closer. I looked at the huge black cock and my mouth started salivating. I wanted to put it in my mouth. I looked at Jane, she smiled and nodded.

I looked up at Jason, he smiled, "Go ahead Sir, help yourself." I lifted it and slowly took the head and about half the shaft in my mouth I was aware that Jane was holding my free hand. I pulled back and licked across the smooth velvety head. I closed my lips around the shaft just behind the ridge. I tasted a drop of his fluids. He was fully erect now and I freed my hand from Jane and gripped his balls with one hand and stroked the shaft with the other. My mouth still enclosed the head.

I lifted the cock from my mouth until it was vertical. His balls were still hanging free so I leaned forward and sucked one in my mouth, letting my tongue circle it several times. His other ball was drawn up tightly below his shaft so I slowly ran my tongue the length of his shaft over the wrinkly black skin covering the big tube along the bottom of his shaft. I looked at Jane, she smiled at me. I put my tongue between my wet lips and rubbed them over the whole cock lubricating him for my hands. He was still not slick enough so I spit a couple gobs of saliva on his cock and spread them with my hands. I sucked him in my mouth again as far as I could and felt the head slip way into my throat. I suppressed a gag and held him there until I ran out of breath. The next stroke of my mouth down his slick black cock was easier and on the thrust after that I felt my nose in his pubic hair. I had to suck in air at the top of each stroke. I glance at Jane, her mouth was open and her eyes were wide. Jason pulled his big cock out of my mouth. He smiled down at me, "Sweet baby girl, you are the best cock sucker I have ever had. No one ever took all of me before. He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine. His tongue forced its way into my mouth. I parted my lips and kissed him back. His lips gently sucked my tongue out and played with it. I returned the favor and sucked on his tongue. I liked it. He look up at Jane, "Ma'am, this is the sweetest little girl I have ever seen. Can I fuck her ass now, I need to cum inside her?"

"Jason you have to ask her, but you must promise to be gentle and not hurt her."

I looked into his big dark brown eyes, "Yes!" He kissed me softly but passionately. He lifted me effortlessly and put me on my hands and knees. I felt his hands part my ass and his tongue lick my asshole. A gentle finger worked its way into my hole. It felt like it was covered with a lubrication of some sort. A second finger joined the first. They plunged easily into my bowels. More lube and a third finger slipped in and out. I liked it.

I felt the head of his cock pressed against my little rosebud. I relaxed and felt it pop inside, only the bulbous black head was inside. He slowly thrust inward and a bit more of his cock slid in. He pulled back and thrust in again, much more went in that time. He began rhythmically but gently thrusting in and out. I liked it. Soon I felt his pubes hit my ass and I tighten up a bit as he pulled out. "Ahugga" he groaned, "So damned sweet, this is the sweetest ass in the whole world."

He picked up the speed and strength of his thrusts. He was pounding into me hard now, there was no pain, only a growing sense of great pleasure. I could feel my cock constantly dribbling fluid. Waves of enjoyment swept through my body. The waves grew in intensity until in a great crash I felt my whole body explode with extreme bliss and joy. I know I screamed and yelled in my happiness. Boy, I really liked that."

He pulled out and I rolled on my back. Soft lips kissed mine and warm tears dropped on my face...Jane! I kissed her back. I looked up at a smiling Jason, he said, "Girl, that was awesome, I can't remember any better than that. Anytime little girl, anytime!"

"How about in five minutes?"

He roared with laughter, "No sweet baby girl, you are going to be very sore tomorrow as it is. We can do it again in a couple of days, each time it will get easier and better."

Jane thanked him and he left. She giggled. I asked what was so funny. She laughed, "You should see his cum running out of your asshole, girl. There is plenty for facials for both of us, do you want one. I nodded, "Yes, please." She scooped up some of his warm cum and rubbed it carefully over my face with her finger tips, around my eyes, across my forehead and cheeks until my face was completely covered. Then she did herself. She put a cupped hand to my lips and said, "Do you want to taste his seed, his black cum?"

"Yes, I do!" She poured a glob in my open mouth. I liked it!

I never tried Jason again but Jane and I each tried every stud in Maddie's stable during the next couple of months. I became very fond of black cock, I found them to be wonderful lovers, kind and eager to please. I would not have another black man for many, many, years.

Jane ran in our room. She showed me a letter addressed to me! I opened it and quickly read it, I was appointed to be a County Judge in Small Claims and/or Traffic Court for the period of one week. It gave the dates which were about two weeks away. I glanced back at the name. It was addressed to Miss Joan M. Murphy. I looked at Jane, "What do you know about this?"

She giggled, "I was at my attorney's office a few weeks ago and saw an announcement for teenage students wanting to get an insight into our legal system. I entered your name."