12 comments/  18662 views/  15 favorites

Walking in Daylight Ch. 01

By: Danae72



This part of the story will introduce you to the main characters in Walking In Daylight. There is no sex in this part, but I hope that it will help the rest of the story that should be posted without too much delay. Please feel free to tell me what works or doesn't, as long as any negative is done in a constructive manner!

For those who have read this before, I've changed the date error.

+++++++

September 2020

The little boy sat huddled on the grass by the stop sign. Ryan Sealey knew he should hurry and get home before his parents started to worry, but since the streetlights weren't on yet and he had his tracker on, he went over anyway. The kid looked vaguely familiar, probably lived nearby, although much too young to have really been noticed before.

"You lost kid?" Ryan was surprised at the way the boy hunched down away from him.

"No, just don't want to be home. Mum and Dad are fighting again, so it's best if I'm out of the way."

Ryan saw the other glance up quickly then look down again. That brief view of his face showed a rather large bruise on one cheek, along with a black eye. For some reason, the injuries made him angry. He wanted to sit and put an arm around the thin shoulders and give comfort. That was totally out of character for him. If his younger brother sat around looking so dejected, Ryan would cuff him on the back of the head and tell him to grow up.

"What's your name? How old are you?"

For the longest time, silence met his questions, until Ryan was sure he wouldn't learn the answer to either one. Finally a soft voice, thick with tears, whispered. "Penlan Taylor. I'm six tomorrow. You're Ryan Sealey and you're ten. You live over there and you have a brother my age called Benjie."

Taylor! Oh jeez, this was the Taylor kid. Ryan took a few steps backward and mumbled about having to get home. His last sight of Penlan was of him curling up on the grass, shoulders shaking violently. Shit, Ryan didn't want to hurt him, but he couldn't be seen being nice to any Taylor. The father was a known nightwalker. Sure, he was bound as harmless by his daywalker wife, whose blood had infected and neutralized the man, but that didn't mean people weren't afraid of them. 

The information packet sent around every year or so, after Kylen Taylor's yearly testing, confirmed that he was still bound. It also revealed the almost pure daywalker status of Eleane Pritchard Taylor, and that their son, Penlan, was neither night nor daywalker, although he had very slight leanings to the direction of daywalker. All that meant was that, while he could not be turned into nightwalker, he also couldn't bind a nightwalker.

At his front porch, Ryan looked back and saw Penlan get to his feet and walk down the street, still hunched over. His clothes were loose and baggy. He still looked so very small, unlike Benjie, who was husky and looked like he was eight or so. Ryan almost decided to run over and offer to walk Penlan home, but his mother opened the door. She sniffed at the sight of Penlan and dragged him inside, warning him to keep a safe distance.

"Bad enough he's in poor Benjie's class, there's no need for any of us to associate with that kind in other situations. Get upstairs and ready for bed, Ryan. You should have been home half an hour ago."

July 2028

Ryan pulled into the gas station on the way home from work. He gassed up and then went inside to pay and buy himself something to drink and munch on. His muscles ached from the long day of roadwork he'd done, a job that would last the summer under his uncle's watchful eye. Uncle Darrel firmly believed in not giving family a break. Even when the other guys took a break, he had to keep going.

As he debated between a sweet snack or a salty one, the clerk's harsh voice caught his attention. "I've told you before, daywalker, we don't serve your kind around here. Get out and don't come back!"

"Please, I just need milk and bread. I have money, so I don't understand why you won't let me buy them."

A daywalker shouldn't be refused service anywhere. Even nightwalkers, bound ones anyway, should not be refused. Ryan frowned and made his way towards the front. The clerk had his hand on the small daywalker's arm and was forcing him out of the store.

"Mr. Kelley. Shall I call my father to come in? Perhaps he will remind you that it is against the charter to refuse service to daywalkers. The Taylor family has lived in the area for at least ten years, if not longer. They need food and supplies just like anyone else."

The boy, who had to be older than he looked, turned around and looked off to the side. "It doesn't matter. I'll just go and get the milk and bread somewhere else. Thank you anyway."

Pen hurried out and looked up at the sky. It was already getting late. His mother would want him home before supper or there'd be hell to pay. Still, he now had to walk the 10 blocks to the grocery store, the only one that usually let him shop without any hassle. Sighing deeply, he shoved his hands into the pockets of his shorts and started forward, careful to keep his head down. Nobody would appreciate it if he accidentally met their eyes.

He didn't understand why people here were so against him. His cousin, Tania, had told him that in Riverton where she lived, she was able to go anywhere and do anything. The daywalkers there were welcome and treated well. Here, he was treated like dirt. Maybe it was because he and his mother were the only ones. Of course, if these people were basing their actions on his mother, then it was little wonder. She was a horrible person. Worse than his father, who was a bound nightwalker. The stories his father told him, and the things Pen himself had witnessed, showed that Eleane was an extremely dangerous person.

Pain flared up his legs and sides when Pen tripped on the uneven sidewalk. Yesterday's beating was a bad one. All because he was 20 minutes late in getting home from his afternoon walk. How bad would it be tonight? How long would he need to recover before he was able to get out for at least a few hours again? Why was his life so damned miserable? He was only 14 years old and he was already tired of life and living. Being at home was torture, being at school wasn't much better, and walking around town didn't bring him any comfort.

Pen felt his muscles tense when a car pulled up beside him. He knew better than to try and ignore it, so he stopped and waited to see if it would be a verbal or physical attack. "Hey kid, here, I bought your stuff for you."

Confusion poured through him and he dared a quick glance towards Ryan. "Why? I could get it from the grocery store."

This couldn't be good. People would see him talking to Ryan Sealey and things would be bad. Rumours might even reach his mother and that would cause trouble at home. Pen took a quick step back when Ryan seemed to appear out of nowhere on the sidewalk. He hadn't even noticed the other boy get out of his car and walk towards him. There was no need for him to look up. Too many times he'd watched the school baseball games and seen Ryan playing and laughing with his friends. Pen knew that the golden brown hair would be all messed up from both wind and hands running through it. He knew that the shoulders and chest would be barely hidden by the tight tees Ryan preferred. The broad but not overly muscles physique was one that attracted all the girls at school. He was everything Pen wished he could be.

It took a moment for him to realize that Ryan was talking to him and tried to focus. "It isn't right that he refused to let you buy this. My dad works at the police station, so I know what the charter allows and doesn't allow. Come on, take it, it's all right. You're Ken, right?"

"Pen, actually," Pen whispered even as he reached out for the bag with trembling fingers. "Thank you, but it would have been better if you'd just let it be. It will only make things worse."

Teenage voices began to shout taunts at Pen from across the street. Ryan looked over in annoyance and saw his brother and his friends there, who all scattered when they realised who he was. By the time he looked back, Pen was already running down the block towards his house. If one judged by his small stature, they would guess the boy was only 10 or 11 years old. Not only was he short, but he was also very delicate.

His blond hair was nearly white and was somewhere between curly and straight, falling just past thin shoulders. His eyes were nearly impossible to see, because of the way they stayed cast down during encounters, but they seemed to be green. Poor Pen seemed so desperately afraid and lonely and it didn't seem fair. The few times Ryan had seen the boy, the same thoughts came to mind, yet otherwise he never seemed to think of him at all.

His father needed to know about the treatment Pen got. Something had to be done, because no matter what his father was, Pen deserved to be treated like everyone else. Ryan hoped he would somehow be able to help at least a little more than he had today.

...

"Did you hear about the daywalker woman?" Ryan kept working, but kept his ears open to hear the men talking nearby.

"No. Tell me what happened. Her nightwalker husband break the binding and kill her and their kid?"

Bruce snorted at the thought. "Nah. Seems her kin came in yesterday and took her away. A sister or something took over the binding. Eleane Taylor was beating both the nightwalker and her kid. The binding kept the husband from fighting back, and the boy's just plain puny."

"That shouldn't have affected the binding. Once a nightwalker is bound, that's it for them, it can't change. Wonder what that's all about."

The conversation changed and Ryan stopped paying attention. Poor Pen! Not only was the town apparently against him and his family, but his own mother was abusing him. The long ago memory of the first time they'd spoken came to mind. 'Mum and Dad are fighting again, so it's best if I'm out of the way'. The beatings must have always happened, and because nobody liked the Taylors, nobody knew about them or did anything to stop them. Not even the school, which was supposed to watch for that kind of thing.

It just wasn't damned fair!

May 2032

The coffee shop wasn't too crowded when Pen walked in hesitantly. He really didn't want to be there, but he also needed to talk to Ryan. Ryan was in town for just a few days, visiting his family. Pen had to talk to him because the man worked at a nearby office of the National Crimes Bureau. All Pen wanted was advice on how to proceed, because things were bad. Very bad.

The place was in a part of town he'd hardly ever been in before, so the staff treated him normally. It was kind of strange. Without the dark looks, the mumbled insults or the outright rudeness, Pen wasn't quite sure how to act. He'd even automatically smiled at the girl behind the counter. When he realized what he'd done, he almost felt like throwing up out of fear. A smile like that for Mr. Kelley at the gas station would likely result in a punch to the face.

In his entire life, only three people here in town hadn't shied away from him totally. His father was so kind and loving, even though he as a nightwalker. They would often spend part of the night together, talking and joking softly while his mother slept. It was just so difficult now, since he was gone all day while his father slept, and his father worked all night while Pen slept. Ryan Sealey had always been fairly nice to him, on those very few occasions their paths crossed. Then there was...no, that hadn't been real. So there were really only two people in town who were nice. His mother's family, especially Tania were great, but he saw them so rarely that they hardly counted.

Pen glanced up when the door opened and saw that Ryan had arrived. Pain squeezed at his heart and stomach at the sight of the older man. He walked in with such carefree confidence. Ryan smiled around and positively swaggered to place his order for coffee and a muffin. The man just knew, without really knowing, that he was welcome and accepted no matter what. Nobody would throw him out just for making an appearance. Nobody would call him names just for being alive and daring to walk with 'decent' people. No, Ryan was totally at ease and attracted the smiles and attention of everyone around him.

Suddenly Pen felt completely torn. He wanted to grab onto the man and hope that some of that acceptance rubbed off on him, and at the same time he wanted to run away so fast and so far that he somehow vanished from the face of the earth. Why had he called Ryan in the first place? Nobody could help him. By Monday morning, his life would turn into an even worse hell that it was now and it was his own fault for forgetting that he was a Taylor.

"Hi Pen," Ryan said with a grin as he dropped into the seat opposite. "Haven't seen you in a long time. I was kind of surprised to get your call."

"Yeah, well, you were off to college and besides, we don't exactly run around in the same social circles at the best of times." Pen offered a small smile to show that he was teasing a little. "Thank you for coming. I have a problem and I just don't know what to do. Or if there's anything I can do."

"Tell me what the problem is, and I'll do what I can to help."

It was obvious that Pen was nervous about talking to him. His hands gripped a folder tightly, bending it back and forth as he chewed on his lower lip. Ryan didn't push, waiting for the other to be ready, looking at the changes that had come since the last time they'd seen each other. The pale gold hair was a bit longer, but still waved, some parts almost curly. If it were shorter, it would probably all be a mass of curls. Even sitting down, Ryan could tell that he was small, probably no more than 5'5 and very slender. Other than a square jaw, Pen's face was almost delicate. 

When Pen licked his lips in preparation to talk, Ryan found his attention drawn to the lips. They were pink and curved. A scar kept them from being perfectly smooth. It started just above the upper lip on the right side, just after the highest part of the curve, and ended a quarter inch below his lower lip. It was nearly mesmerizing, but Ryan pulled his eyes away. Pen's gaze was still locked on the folder, so he didn't notice how much his companion was staring, which suited Ryan just fine.

He had no idea why he was being so intent. So what if Pen's nose was straight and thin? So what if the lashes of the slightly angled eyes were more curved and long than most women's? Did it really matter that the eyebrows were arched, and colored a darker blond, along with the lashes? His throat cleared and it seemed to prompt the younger man into speech.

"Someone took some pictures of me. Pictures of an, um, intimate nature. They sent me copies, along with a message that said they would send them to the members of the sports teams of the high school over the weekend. It's probably already done. In general, this wouldn't be a problem, except that, well, those guys might not like who I was with." Pen turned a bright red and looked at Ryan for a moment. Ryan's frown immediately conveyed his confusion on why this was a problem. "The person's face isn't revealed, but that doesn't matter. It's painfully obvious that...I mean it's clearly...Oh damn, anyone could see in half a second that I'm not with a girl."

Understanding dawned on Ryan's face and Pen blushed furiously again. Ryan knew that while being gay wasn't that big a deal, for kids in high school, it could cause a problem. Especially in the showers after gym class, by those who were so intent on proving how macho and masculine they were. "Well, I can certainly understand how that could cause some awkwardness, and..."

"There's a bit more to this situation. Something that could be even more problematic." Pen took a deep breath, sipped at his cold coffee, and breathed deeply again. "Since my father is a nightwalker, I've inherited a particular trait. In certain circumstances, times where emotions are heightened, whether positive or negative, residual fangs make an appearance. They're nothing like those of a nightwalker," he was quick to say, nearly panicked, "and the instincts are not there but still. I've warned, um, partners about it so they wouldn't get scared. People seeing the pictures, though, might not understand."

"Jesus. Yeah, that could cause some trouble. So, the person you were with took these pictures and threatened to send them out."

"No, no, the person in the pictures is not the one who took the pictures. The one who took them told me who he was. It's possible, I suppose, that they were working together, but I doubt it. I just need to know, and I figured having training enforcement you might have good suggestions, what I can do to get through this. Stay away from school awhile? Inform the principal now about this so something can be done right away on Monday morning?"

Ryan wanted to help and leaned back in his chair thoughtfully. His first suggestions were both refused out of hand, which annoyed him. First was for Ryan to confront the sender and see if there was any way to prevent anyone from seeing the pictures. Maybe they hadn't been sent out yet. Pen vehemently refused to name the person, insisting that it wouldn't help, and would probably cause more problems. Second was for Ryan and Pen to go to the police station and talk to Ryan's father, who was now the chief. Again Pen refused, looking terrified, eyes wet with the tears he was trying to hold back.

It was very frustrating for Ryan. Instead of trying to think of other options, he began to push the younger man, insisting now to know who had took the pictures and threatened to expose the truth. Pen was suddenly reminded of his mother. She had a knack of trying to get him to admit to wrongdoing when she couldn't immediately find a reason to punish him. The moment she sensed a weakness, she would pick and push and manipulate him into saying something that would give her the excuse she wanted. The questioning might have started about whether his homework was done, or whether he'd snitched a cookie, and she would go until he said something that was against 'the rules'.

Panic caused Pen's heart to pound in his chest. He wondered that nobody seemed to hear it, especially Ryan. There was no escape, no matter how much he wanted to avoid it, he would tell the truth. At last, unable to take it anymore, he pressed his fists against his temples and blurted out that the person who took the pictures was Ryan's brother Benjie. Pen's fears came true after nearly 30 seconds of stunned silence.

"You're lying! There's no way in hell that Benjie would do something like that. What is this, some kind of daywalker trick? He's the son of the chief of police, for Christ's sake."

Pen felt sick. Here he'd come to speak to this man, then he was badgered into giving information he didn't want to give, and he was being treated like scum. Why was he so surprised? Everyone treated him like that. Just because Ryan treated him well in the past was of no consequence. It was nothing more than his desire to look good in front of others, act all kind and wonderful to boost his own ego and confidence.

With a hollowness that numbed him to all emotion, Pen gathered up the folder. When he spoke, his voice was low and flat. "I apologize for bothering you, Agent Sealey. Goodbye." He heard the other man call his name but ignored it, quickly leaving the coffee shop and then running towards home, using all the shortcuts he knew to get there quickly and without being seen.

Damnation! Ryan watched Pen run away from the coffee shop through the window. Watching the green eyes, that for once didn't stay locked down, turn empty had made him feel bad for his outburst. There was no way that Benjie could have done what Pen said. Maybe someone else was responsible and signed Benjie's name to divert the blame. That was certainly more plausible. Pen's reaction made Ryan certain that he hadn't knowingly lied. He truly believed what he was saying was the truth.


Walking in Daylight Ch. 01



He got to his feet and saw a white square of paper on the floor beside the chair where Pen was sitting. He picked it up, and then sucked in his breath when he saw what it was. It was one of the pictures of Pen in a compromising position that had been in the folder. The boy was sitting on a man's lap, leaning back against muscular thighs with his head thrown back. Although the genital area was blacked out, it was obvious that Pen was riding his lover and enjoying it very much. His expression was one of ecstatic bliss. Both bodies were covered in a sheen of sweat and Ryan found himself wishing he could see the movement and hear the sounds of pleasure. Barely visible in the mouth, which was either panting or moaning, were the fangs. They weren't that noticeable, but they would probably be blown out of proportion.

Ryan could not tear his eyes away. The creamy skin looked satin soft and smooth. Pen was either hairless, or any body hair was too pale and fine to show up on the pictures. The pink nipples were hard and seemed to beg to be sucked and bitten. Embarrassed at the direction his thoughts were taking, Ryan tucked the picture into his pocket and took his leave. Nothing would happen. Pen would find out that nobody had seen the pictures and life would return to normal. He didn't need to do anything and it would all work out.

Four days later, Ryan called his father. It was Tuesday, and he told himself there was no ulterior motive for his phone call. Nearly the first thing out of his father's mouth was about the upset at the school, although upset was too mild a word. Apparently, a mob of students had dragged Pen to the football field, where a lot of townspeople were waiting, and they proceeded to beat Pen into unconsciousness. It would have been a lot worse, but Ryan's father had happened to be driving by and saw the gathering. 

Pen was treated at the hospital for a wide range of serious injuries and had just come out of surgery when Kylen Taylor arrived after sundown. He had taken Pen out of the hospital, saying he doubted that his son would be safe and they left. They didn't just leave the hospital, but the town.

Feeling guilty, Ryan told his father about how Pen had asked him for a meeting and everything that had been said. Chief Steven Sealey was stunned that his younger son's name was given as the sender of the picture and threat. He hoped also that it was someone else who had put Benjie's name to cause trouble.

In the end, Benjie admitted to everything, sounding proud of having run out the nightwalker family. He couldn't be charged, because there was no proof and the Taylors were gone could not press charges.

Ryan knew that he could have prevented the beating if he hadn't immediately refused to believe his brother's involvement. His words had sent Pen away. He could have talked things over with his father and maybe done something. Nobody knew where the Taylors had gone. All searches came up empty. Ryan decided that he would work twice as hard as anyone in the National Crimes Bureau, and would ask to be assigned to the Daywalker Protection section. Maybe he had fucked up, but he would do all he could to make sure nothing like that ever happened again.



Walking in Daylight Ch. 02



Ryan fell back onto the couch and sighed in relief. Finally, he was done with his unpacking. Tomorrow he started at his new job at the Federal Daywalker Protection Agency, which was newly created. His name had been on the list ever since talk began for the new Agency, so he had his pick of where to work. He chose Rutherford, which had a high concentration of daywalkers in its jurisdiction.

A box on the kitchen counter caught his attention. His pictures. All of his friends teased him for having actual prints instead of keeping them digital. There was just something about being able to sit with an album in his hands and flip through the pages that helped relax him. As always, he needed to resist the urge to look through one particular album. The one that only held two pictures. The binding on that album was the only one showing signs of wear, because he had looked at those pictures so often over the past four years.

It didn't take more than three minutes before he walked over and reached inside. Ryan didn't need to look for the one he wanted, because it was right on the top. The first picture was one he'd found on the floor of a coffee shop. Penlan Taylor in the throes of passion with a man and looking damned sexy. The second picture was a copy taken from his father's office. Penlan Taylor again, only this time beaten and bloody after the school jocks and others from town herded him onto the football field to 'punish' him for being a daywalker/nightwalker half-breed.

Ryan remembered when Pen had asked to meet him in the coffee shop and told him someone had taken compromising pictures. All the boy had said was 'someone' took the pictures of him with a man, and that they also showed fangs. As a half-breed, he was more daywalker, but he had residual fangs inherited from his nightwalker father. Those fangs only appeared when angry or when in the grips of passion, Pen quickly stated with the promise that he didn't have the nightwalker instincts to bite. The people of their small hometown hated the Taylor family, treating them worse than criminals, even though they'd never done anything wrong. Well, except for the daywalker mother. She had abused both her husband and son. Her family had come along and taken her away in the end, because she was too dangerous.

When Ryan pushed to find out who had taken the pictures, he'd been shocked to discover it was his own younger brother. So shocked, that he'd immediately refused to believe Pen. After all, their father was the chief of police, so of course, Benjie couldn't possibly be involved in anything like that. Pen ran away from him, dropping the picture, and gone to school the following Monday. Where the school jocks brought him out to the football field. People from the town were there waiting and they all jumped on the kid.

Penlan Taylor was just a tiny guy, about six or seven inches shorter than Ryan's six-foot frame. It wasn't just in height though. Pen was almost painfully thin, his clothes hanging off his body. Ryan figured he could probably pick Pen up with just one hand and hardly feel it at all. Until the moment he'd seen the picture of Pen in the act, so to speak, Ryan hadn't realized that he could be attracted to a man as well as to a woman. It didn't happen often for him, but it did happen. Never as strongly as when he'd seen that picture.

"I don't care if I said I didn't want to eat, you still make me supper, you lazy slut!"

Ryan sat up straight as the wall between the two apartments shook slightly. The walls were thick here, so whatever hit on the other side had hit hard. Shit, he shouldn't even be able to hear anything between the two. He realized he could hear because his window was open. The other window must be open too, and that was why he could hear the man next door shouting.

"Come on, Harvey," another voice, also male Ryan noted, pleaded. "There's tons of food in the fridge and I have to get to work. I can't be late again. Even if you'd said you wanted supper, it would have been leftovers anyway."

A cry, barely heard, was quickly followed by the harsher voice. "I fucking hate leftovers! You know that and yet you foist that crap off on me. No more! You're not going anywhere tonight, you little freak, I've got to teach you a lesson."

The next cry Ryan heard was filled with such pain, almost masking the sound of breaking glass, that he grabbed up his phone and called the police. He was set to go over there, but he wanted to at least have back up on the way. Once the address was out, he stepped into the hallway to get the actual apartment number, and was then stunned at the news he heard.

"Sorry, Sir, a daywalker lives there. Daywalkers are now under the authority of the Federal Daywalker Protection Agency. Would you like me to give you their number?"

What the Hell? "This is Agent Ryan Sealey, of the FDPA. Our authority is not all-inclusive. Crimes of any kind, no matter who is involved, are still to be taken care of by police and then referred if necessary."

"Our instructions are quite specific, Agent Sealey. Only the FDPA can be dispatched if the address is linked to a daywalker." The woman sounded bored and monotonous. "Until such time as we are told differently, I cannot send out any officers to your location."

This was ridiculous, more so considering that the local office of the FDPA wasn't even officially open until the next day. He would have to see what was going on with that, and either change it, or have the emergency operators transfer the calls directly. That was going to cause no end of trouble; he could feel it.

He pounded his fist on the door and waited impatiently for an answer. It didn't take long before a stocky black-haired man opened it with a growl. Ryan let his eyes sweep over the interior that he could see. This apartment was a mirror image of his own, the kitchen off to the left of the door rather than the right. A broken vase of flowers lay beside the coffee table, a few of the pieces showing blood.

A figure sat on the couch, short red hair tangled and messy. He seemed fine, if a little pale and Ryan was glad there weren't any obvious injuries. "I'm Agent Sealey with the FDPA. It sounded like there was quite a fight going on in here."

The two men exchanged a look and turned red before meeting his gaze. Surprisingly, they looked sheepish. The one at the door cleared his throat. "Yeah, we're sorry. We were playing around, you know, to add some spice. It really is all right, although I know how it must have sounded."

"The blood on the vase pieces?"

"My fault," the other said in a shy voice, coming to stand beside his boyfriend. "I'd just come from the shower and left my towel on the floor. I tripped over it and fell onto the coffee table. It's so embarrassing. Um, can I ask what FDPA is? And how you got here so quickly, since we were only...playing...for a few minutes."

Ryan explained about the FDPA and that he was their new next-door neighbour. They introduced themselves with a bit of a laugh and invited him for coffee. The dark-haired man was Harvey Mills and the redhead was Joey Compton. He teased them a bit about their behaviour and Joey groaned. It was Joey's idea to play that game, just to try something new and he'd had no idea of the eventual consequences. After an hour or so, they were all laughing and completely at ease.

The two men began exchanging some long glances. Not the 'If we were alone I'd fuck you' kind of glances, but the 'Is this something we can talk about' kind. Ryan had come to recognize that type of look during previous investigations. He decided not to pry, since these men were fast becoming friends. If it was important enough, they would open up to him soon.

When he bid them good night, not too late since he had to get up for work early in the morning, Ryan found himself with an armful of food to tide him over for the next few days. Joey insisted that he always cooked too much and it would make room in their fridge for more. With a last glance at Harvey, Joey took a deep breath and finally revealed what had been bothering him.

"Ryan, my cousin Alex Wade is the reason I wanted to play the game tonight. He's always, um, acting rough with his boyfriend. He insists that it's a game they play and I wanted to try to see if it could be fun. I've never thought it was in good fun like he claimed, but P usually agrees with Alex. Would it be possible for you to check it out?"

"I could, if this P is a daywalker. Do you have a full name so I can check the database at work?"

"P is a daywalker for sure," Joey confirmed. "As for a name, Alex says P is enough of a name, so that's all we know. They live over on 114th Street. Well, Alex kind of moved in with P a couple of months ago. I'll find the address and if you stop by in the morning, I'll have it for you."

With a last good night, Ryan made his way home and prepared for bed. At least he had some new friends in this town now, right next door to where he lived. He grinned at the way they'd met, figuring it would make a good story. Though the rule about police not responding to calls about daywalkers had to change, in this case it had turned out well. Imagine the embarrassment, not just for Harvey and Joey but for himself as well, if the cops had been present as well.

There were several meetings the next day. Agents were introduced to each other, guidelines about jurisdiction were set out and assignments handed out. Ryan brought up the problem about the police procedure in place concerning the daywalkers, and the chief promised to straighten the problem out. Although not the chief, Ryan was the next thing, and could pretty much decide what he wanted to work on and what to hand off to other agents. After lunch, he settled down at a computer to find out about Joey's cousin and boyfriend.

He found that there was a file on Alex Wade, all concerning assault. Several notations on domestic abuse were made, but none of them were followed up. The possible victims all refused to admit to the abuse or to file charges. That was enough to make Ryan believe that whoever this P was, he could be in danger.

"No, it can't be."

The information on the address brought up the name of the mysterious P. Penlan Taylor rented the apartment of 114th.

There were several calls to police noted, none of them with follow-up visits. No charges made by Penlan. Three previous addresses were listed when Pen's file appeared on the screen; the police were called to all of the locations when complaints about screaming came in from neighbours. The boyfriends, many different names, were never charged.

Oh Pen, I'm so sorry, Ryan thought to the young man he'd once known.

+++

Soon it would be his turn to read his report to the class. Pen signed and slid further down in his chair, hoping he could somehow become invisible. He wouldn't come back to class after tonight. It was just too difficult, trying to keep the questions about his marks and the way he moved so slowly and carefully. He loved the class and now he had to leave. Trying to better himself had been a stupid idea. Maybe if Jen took a long time on her report, he wouldn't have to go up there and speak.

Those hopes were dashed ten minutes later when the teacher called his name.

"I've written about the beginnings of the daywalkers. The first of what we now call daywalkers, those with the ability to bind nightwalkers, were created in 1995."

Nightwalkers, the beings who used to be referred to as vampires, became known to the world as more than myth in the late 1980s. Soon after, many of the world's governments funded projects to find a way to neutralize the creatures. That or completely destroy them. Several test subjects were captured and kept confined, while various serums and methods were tried out. An accidental exposure to 'normal' people of a particular serum became the best answer currently available.

The genetic makeup of those infected transformed to be almost identical to the nightwalkers. Only the rapid blood cell degeneration was absent, which allowed blood testing to identify them as different. Physical differences were the ability to be out in the daytime, resistance to disease, and the lack of fangs. Unlike nightwalkers, daywalkers still aged normally, although projections showed it was likely they would live longer life spans.

Some governments still tried to perfect the formula, to give the daywalkers the ability to have the fangs. This would allow them to actively seek out nightwalkers, rather than wait to be attacked for the binding to work.

Binding a nightwalker simply meant that the blood degeneration was vastly slowed. The need and appetite for blood, human blood, practically vanished. As long as they could access a supply of blood, usually animal for those who were bound, they were no longer a danger. After the binding, most were happy with the change and would keep to an animal diet on their own. Even if they did go after human blood, their urges were no longer dangerous and they could not turn a human anymore. Nobody was quite sure why that was. Some humans liked being bitten and having a nightwalker drink their blood. As long as there was no danger, it was allowed for bound nightwalkers.

Pen's report had dates and names and statistics, painstakingly gathered over months. Ever since this assignment appeared on the class description. He'd wanted to speak about daywalker/nightwalker half-breeds such as himself, but there was very little information on what was yet a rare occurrence. Plus, he didn't really want anyone to know about him in that way.

"Time will tell whether the daywalkers will truly live longer than regular humans. Some scientists believe that daywalkers will age normally to a certain age and then maintain indefinitely. Until more subjects age further, that theory is impossible to either prove or disprove. Thank you."

"Well done, Mr. Taylor. A little dry, but still very well researched. That is all for today, class. See you on Thursday."

Pen gathered his books and papers into his bag and hurried out. He didn't particularly want to go home, but at least Alex was gone until nearly midnight tonight. There would be time for a long soak in a hot bath, which would help ease his muscles and the pain of his bruises. How long until he could leave Alex?

The bus ride was hellish. There were too many people, surprising so early in the evening, and he kept getting jostled. Every time someone bumped into him, it seemed to be right on a bruise. Just his rotten luck. Pen still calculated his savings in between bursts of pain. There was enough for a first and last payment, as long as he could find somewhere in his price range. The only real problem was where to live now. He loved Rutherford but areas to live, not too near any of his exes, was getting difficult. Near work was also a priority, since he was sometimes short of money and needed to walk back and forth. Tomorrow he would start looking for somewhere to move to and leave Alex.

Then again, there might not be much point in moving. He always seemed to get involved with men who loved to beat up on him. It was in his nature to be used in that way, it seemed. Was he so horrible and difficult to love? Even when he swore not to date anymore, he managed to fall for someone. They started out loving and caring enough, but too soon it changed.

No, Pen knew he couldn't think that way. This time he would keep his distance from people. He would work and refuse all invitations. He'd learned to stay home with Alex, and that could carry on to his new apartment. To work and home, no dates or even conversations, and maybe he could be at peace. He wouldn't even be polite to his neighbours. Some people just weren't meant to be with others, and he was simply that type of person.

He knew there would be trouble when he opened the apartment door to find Alex inside, pacing. "Alex? What are you doing here? I just mean you're supposed to be working tonight, unless I misunderstood your schedule."

"Who have you been talking to about me? An agent of the FDPA showed up when I was about to leave, asking questions about whether or not I beat you." Pen whimpered when Alex's hand gripped his hair and yanked his head back. "You've got to learn to keep your mouth shut, bitch."

"I-I don't even know what the FDPA is! You know I would never say anything to anyone about what goes on between you and me...Aargh!"

A strong flip of the wrist holding Pen's hair sent the small man stumbling back. He tripped over his own feet and fell against the kitchen counter. The sharp edge dug painfully on his back and scraped as his legs gave out. Pen lay there for a moment, trying to get a handle on the pain. Alex stood over him within seconds, taking a fistful of shirt to haul him to his feet.

The look on Alex's face promised that this would be bad. There would be very little in the way of visible injuries, if any, and those only if Pen fell in an awkward way. Pain exploded as a fist jabbed into his side, quickly followed by an elbow to his stomach. Any cries that came out because of the blows had to be low or it would get worse.

This can't be my life. The words repeated through his head as Pen tried to distance himself from the agony inflicted on his body. Although he knew where he was struck, he couldn't tell by what or how hard. Kidneys, stomach and chest were the most frequent points of contact. At least some of the blows were from kicks, since his eyes opened occasionally and he saw that he lay on the floor, fingers scrabbling against the rug to try and drag away.

Alex knelt down, a knee pressing into the small of Pen's back while a hand pressed his head sideways onto the floor. "You're such a weak, disgusting piece of filth. You should be glad that I even bother to stay around you."

"I know, Alex, I know. I'm weak and pathetic. Please."

"I'm going to stay at Jim's for a few days. The agent said he'd drop by to see you in the morning, so get rid of him. Now, just so you'll be ready, I'm done with your foolishness. When I get back, I mean to finally take your ass, whether you want me to or not."

Always the same thing. Pen lay on the floor for nearly an hour after the door closed, alternately crying and wishing for someone, anyone, to come take care of him. When Pen started dating someone, they were very sweet and attentive. They agreed with his stipulation of no anal sex, saying it didn't matter. 'I want you, Pen,' they would insist. Eventually, however, it became clear that they thought he only meant at the beginning. Soon they would begin to grumble and try to take what he didn't offer.

Alex actually lasted much longer than most. Instead of trying to force the issue while they were having sex, his tactic was persuasion. Constantly asking, giving reassurance that it would be pleasurable, even if in other situations he raised his fists and administered kicks.

Eventually Pen pulled himself up onto weak legs and stumbled to the bathroom. The water mesmerized him as it filled the tub, as hot as he could stand it. His mind filled with plans for the future. He needed to find a new place to live within the next few days, so he could be away before Alex came back. Alex was so much bigger and stronger than he was, and he would be able to rape him with very little trouble if he was really intent on it.

First, however, Pen needed to deal with this agent that would visit in the morning. He needed to have his wits about him. Various stories chased themselves around as he lowered himself into the near scalding bath. Vaguely now he recalled the announcement of the new agency. The Federal Daywalker Protection Agency. Why were they interfering with his life? How had they come to see Alex, when there was no reason? Because of that damned agent's visit, he'd been beaten, and he'd been so careful not to antagonize Alex since he planned on leaving so soon.




Walking in Daylight Ch. 02



Once he was clean, Pen lay back to let the heat seep into his muscles. His eyes wandered over the bottles of painkillers that lined the side of the tub. Sometimes he needed relief sooner than recommended, which was why he needed so many types. Choosing the strongest dosage, Pen swallowed the tablets dry and hoped they would start acting quickly. He stayed, mind whirling yet unfocused, until the water started to become uncomfortably cool.

Without taking the time to dry his waist length hair, Pen quickly hurried to bed. It was surprisingly early, only about nine-thirty, but he was exhausted and needed sleep. A hot shower in the morning, might just make him feel partly normal by the time his unwanted visitor arrived. He knew he needed to make a very good impression if he wanted the agent to go away and leave him alone.

+++

Coffee is good. Pen inhaled the fragrance coming from his cup and sighed happily. French vanilla was perfect this morning. Along with the bagel and cream cheese, it made a rough morning seem better. He was sore, wincing when he moved too quickly, but that was a state he was used to. It hardly registered anymore, so long as he kept taking the painkillers every couple of hours.

He was already dressed, since he intended to run down to the corner and grab a newspaper as soon as he finished his breakfast. Not that he was particularly hungry, it was just that his stomach always felt better with something in it after it had been abused. Probably helped shore up the bruising or some such shit. He didn't really care why, only that it helped.

When the doorbell rang, Pen frowned, wondering who could be visiting, until he remembered Alex saying something about an agent with the FDPA coming by. Carefully he stood and paused in front of the hall mirror. He checked himself over to be sure there weren't any obvious signs that all was not well. The green turtleneck hid the bruises that were healing along his collarbone and on his arms. It was a bit snugger than he would have liked, but he only owned the one. His black jeans were loose and he'd left off the belt. No way could he have stood the restriction around his midsection. If he weren't going out, he would have stayed in nothing more than a robe until it was time to go to work.

The bell rang again. "I'm coming, I'm coming," he muttered. If possible, he wasn't going to open the door. His eyes looked pained and red. Not good.

"Who is it?"

"Mr. Taylor? We're with the Federal Daywalker Protection Agency. We had a report that you might need help with an abusive relationship and wanted to discuss the situation with you. You are Mr. Penlan Taylor, are you not?"

The voice sounded familiar. Another voice prompted for an answer, a woman's voice. "Yes, I'm Pen Taylor, but I'm afraid there's been a mistake. Whoever contacted you didn't know what they were talking about."

"Could you please open the door, just so we can talk? I'm Agent Carlie Simmonds and my partner is Agent Ryan Sealey."

Pen opened the door and looked at the agents. The woman didn't really register in Pen's mind. He got an impression of a tall woman with black hair and a fancy suit. Ryan, however, got his entire attention. He was just like Pen remembered, only more. The memory he carried around had faded and blurred over time, but everything was now crystal clear.

The golden brown hair was longer now than it was during their meeting at the coffee shop. It fell past Ryan's ears and curled slightly. His face was leaner, but still square and angular. Definitely a masculine face, unlike his own which always seemed too soft. The suit hid the man's build, except for showing the broad shoulders.

Only now, faced with the man, did Pen realize something. All of his boyfriends over the past four years resembled Ryan. Only the eyes differed. That was because Pen had never really looked at Ryan's eyes before, having learned as a young child never too look people in the face. They were gold. He'd never seen anyone with gold eyes before.

Pen gave himself a mental shake as he realized that if he stared any longer, Ryan and his partner would certainly notice. "Well, well, Ryan Sealey. I'm shocked that you would be involved with anything involving the protection of daywalkers. If I were in need of help for anything, I definitely wouldn't look to you to provide it. When I did need help and asked it of you, all you did was call me a lying daywalker. Go away and leave me alone."

With that, he slammed the door shut and leaned back against the wall. Oh God! Why hadn't he known? How could he not know that he had a crush on Ryan Sealey? Now that he accepted it, he knew when it happened. The day that Ryan stood up for him at the gas station and bought him the milk and bread. Everyone he became involved with after that, from his first kiss to Alex, all had traits similar to Ryan. This couldn't be happening to him!

Actually, now that he thought about it, maybe it was good that he knew. He spoke his new resolve out loud as he hurried to the bedroom to tie back his hair before going for the newspaper. "From now on, I won't even look at anyone unless they have dark hair. That must be why I'm always in this situation. It has to be." 



Walking in Daylight Ch. 03



I want to thank everyone who left me comments (and votes!) on the first chapter of my story. I wasn't sure about submitting my work, because while I enjoy them, I didn't know how they would be received. I'll be working on re-writing the rest of the story and hope to submit it all at once, but if it seems to take to long, I'll split it into a couple of chapters. There are already other characters and settings demanding to be written, but I'll try my best to get this one done before starting another!

Please leave feedback, I'd love to hear what you think. If it is something negative, I want to hear it too, as long as it's given constructively!

+++

A two-bedroom apartment in a duplex for only $500 had to be a mistake. It was practically a house. There was even an upstairs and a downstairs. Pen opened a door he'd just noticed and gaped at stairs going down into a basement. There was a basement in addition to an upstairs and a downstairs. It didn't even smell musty and old.

"This is really amazing, Ma'am. Is the price right? The paper must have made a mistake."

"No, that's right, and it includes all the utilities. All you'd have to pay is the phone and whatever service you want to use for your television. There is a catch, however."

Of course, there had to be a catch. At the moment, the only thing Pen thought he could say no to would be if he had to kill someone. "What's that?"

"My husband and I like to travel. We're gone almost all the time. If you decide to take the apartment, it will be your job to take care of the yard and keep an eye on our place. There is an account for you to draw funds from and all you have to do is call us up and we'll give the authorization."

Pen stared for a moment, and then sat down heavily on one of the chairs. He was asleep at home. Or maybe Alex had beaten him unconscious and he was in a coma in the hospital. This kind of thing just didn't happen. It especially didn't happen to him. According to this prospective landlady, he could live in this apartment at a ridiculous low price, all for taking care of the place. 

Without the utilities, he'd be saving loads of money and could afford to buy some luxuries. Even then, this apartment had great furniture so that wouldn't eat into his savings. A new big screen TV maybe. Oh, and clothes! He could go out and buy some clothes that didn't come from a thrift shop.

"Why would you off this to someone you don't even know? You remember that I'm a daywalker, don't you?"

Edna Casher smiled at the young man, who looked so sad from the moment she laid eyes on him. "I couldn't care less that you're a daywalker, child. Truth be told, this arrangement wouldn't be offered to just anyone, but I feel like I can trust you. I see in your eyes that you're a good person. Plus I feel that you need help as much as we need it. I can see the bruises through your shirt since you took off your jacket."

Heat flooded Pen's cheeks as he quickly pulled his jacket back on. Mrs. Casher, just having met him and seen bruises, deemed him worthy of such an immense amount of trust.

"I'll do my very best not to make you regret giving me this chance, Ma'am. If it's all right with you, I'll sign whatever you need me to right away and go get my things ready."

"Move in whenever you're ready, Penlan Taylor. Today, next week, whenever it's convenient. And if you ever need any help, for anything, you just pick up the phone and give me a call."

+++

Ryan parked his car and looked at the apartment building. He needed to get Pen to talk to him, so he could apologize properly. It wouldn't change anything, but it would make him feel better. Not that Pen would accept the apology. Carlie, his partner, showed her surprise at the fact that he knew Pen, and by what Pen had said, but except for a quick inquiry let it alone. She was great. Already he felt like they would get along just fine.

"I don't know what else to tell you, Mr. Wade. Mr. Taylor moved out yesterday and told me to move your boxes into storage until you made arrangements. You saw the apartment's empty of all personal items, and he didn't leave a forwarding address. Here's where to pick up your stuff. Just be glad I'm not charging you since it was just a day."

Penlan's boyfriend swore and jumped into a small red car. Ryan watched for a moment, and then went to speak to the man in the doorway, showing his credentials. "I'm Agent Sealey. Did I hear you say that Mr. Penlan Taylor moved out of his apartment?"

"That's right," the man confirmed. "Came in day before yesterday to let me know he was moving. Even gave me next month's rent for the short notice and wouldn't take it back no matter how much I tried. I mean, I'll have this place rented in a couple of days, no problem. He really didn't leave me a forwarding address though."

Well damn. With a new change of address, it could take up to a month or more for the computer system to be updated and let him know where Pen moved to. It felt important for him to get to Pen quickly. He recalled the anger in those green eyes as Pen threw Ryan's words back at him.

The landlord held up a finger and asked him to wait for a moment. Ryan waited, even as he wondered what the man could want. A couple of young women walked by on the street. They looked him up and down before giggling together. He smiled and nodded, which made them giggle even more. The girls were cute, but he hardly paid them any real attention. Normally, he would flirt a little more. Now, though, all he had on his mind was how to find Pen and quickly. This was getting ridiculous.

"I don't have a new address, but I still have his work information if that will help you. Since you're an agent and all, I figure that it's all right to give this to you."

Ryan thanked the man and examined the piece of paper. Three days a week, this being one of those days, Pen worked at a company called Classical Advertising. The rest of the time, apparently, he did freelance work. There was no indication of the nature of the freelance work. Brewster Place wasn't all that far from Ryan's apartment, which meant it was on the way. Nothing wrong with him stopping by while he was in the neighbourhood. It wouldn't fool Pen for a minute, but it would give him the opportunity to clear the air.

+++

Pen hung up the phone and sighed when he saw the three new files on the corner of his desk. His job was reception and SOME report preparation. Lately, all of the reports made their way to his desk. Advertising was an interesting business, unless you worked reception and had to deal with all the complainers, both clients and the public. Then there was the hassle of keeping all the execs and other employees of the business happy. Everyone needed to be kept happy except him. The story of his life.

Damn he sounded depressed, even to himself. That would never do. His job was important, he reasoned as he finished inputting a set of numbers to finish one of the reports. If he failed in any way, things would topple like dominoes, from the bottom to the top. Everyone worked hard, just in different ways. Being the receptionist didn't mean his work wasn't as important, or even more so. It just wasn't as...obvious.

Blinking at the empty corner of his desk, Pen realized that he had finished all the reports, including the three new ones. Maybe some internal bitching was what he needed to make the work go by quickly. He had to grin at the thought. It certainly helped that the phone only rang once while working on the reports and nobody arrived for an appointment. The door chimed to announce a visitor, which made Pen laugh to himself, until he saw who the visitor was. Ryan Sealey. Agent Ryan Sealey to be precise.

Just as he prepared himself to blast the man, one of the executives entered the reception area with a client. Pen turned his attention to Ryan with his most professional look. "Welcome to Classical Advertising, Sir. How may I direct you?"

"I'm here to speak with you, Pen. There are things we need to discuss."

"With me?" Pen slid his eyes to Ms. Roman for a second, and then returned them to Ryan at a point just off his left ear. "I'm sure there's nothing to discuss between us, since it doesn't seem to pertain to advertising. Anything else, you will have to find me when I'm not at work. Sir."

"Is there a problem here?" Ms. Roman arrived next to them after seeing the client off. "Perhaps I can be of assistance."

"No, Ma'am, but thank you. This is Agent Sealey with the FDPA and he was just leaving so I can get back to work."

"FDPA? Oh, yes! Well I just hope he's here to do something about that boyfriend of yours. Take the rest of the day off, but come in tomorrow morning. We've been talking and Andrea just isn't working out. We hope you'll take the job full-time rather than part-time. Ring me up when you arrive, Pen and we'll talk about everything. See you."

Was the whole world against him? Apparently so. All he wanted was to be left in peace to live his own life the best he could. Instead, Ryan was there. Handsome, strong, beautiful Ryan. Even if all his past boyfriends resembled the man, none of them came close to the power Ryan radiated so effortlessly. I will not embarrass myself. I won't look at him as if he's the tastiest dessert. I will be short and abrupt and send him on his way as soon as possible. Pen sighed, knowing it wouldn't be so easy. Tomorrow he would quit this job and find another. That way, neither Ryan nor Wade would be able to find him so easily.

Shrugging into his jacket before coming around the reception desk, conscious that his bruises might be visible through his white shirt, Pen walked by Ryan and out onto the sidewalk. When the taller man, the much taller man, joined him, he crossed his arms and glared.

"What do you want? I told you, there is nothing I need your help with. I've taken care of myself for a long time now and can keep doing it. Just leave me alone, Ryan."

"Pen, I just wanted to apologize for what happened. I couldn't fathom that Benjie would do such a thing, to anyone."

"Apology accepted. It likely would have happened even if you'd chosen to believe me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some errands I can take care of right away, since I'm done work early." Pen began walking towards the stores the next block over. He held his breath, hoping against hope it would be just that easy getting rid of Ryan.

"Let me treat you to dinner, to make up for it. Please Pen, we used to be kind of friends. Dinner and coffee, then I'll take you home."

No. Definitely not. This is a really bad idea. "Fine. Dinner and coffee, this one time only, and then I find my own way home."

Ryan grinned at him and Pen thought he might just start drooling. When Ryan smiled like that, it showed his teeth and the hint of a dimple on the left side of his mouth. He looked positively delicious. More than a little nervous, Pen quietly followed his companion to a beautiful car. It was one of the new retro models, identical in appearance to the '69 Mustang, but with all the modern amenities. It used the new clean fuel cells and had the smart roof. This type of car Pen wanted desperately to have but knew he could never afford to own. Besides, even if he could afford it, it would be silly to buy a car he couldn't drive.

He couldn't help himself. Pen ran a hand along the line of the roof, not quite touching in case he should mar the beautiful finish. He knew he looked like a kid presented with a chocolate feast when he turned wide eyes to Ryan, but he couldn't help himself. He never could have imagined anyone allowing so close to such a car.

Ryan winked and unlocked the door for him. The interior looked like it belonged to a different car. The outside was red and the inside was all black and silver. There were dials for everything from the stereo system to the satellite navigator. Pen glanced over the seven-point shifter, completely clueless about that, and saw individual heat controls for each seat and the feet. One small panel puzzled Pen until he leaned closer and read the indicator. Not one but two automatic driving setting. How could someone need two drive settings? Both were set to the off position, meaning Ryan drove himself. Not too many people did that anymore, even if they all had to learn.

When Pen sat in the seat, it automatically adjusted for his body. Oh man, this was amazing. Never in his life had he been so comfortable in a car. His feet reached the floor comfortably and the seatbelt didn't cut into his neck. The dashboard even lowered slightly so he had a clear view ahead. Nobody he knew would ever believe he'd had such a treat. If he even tried to describe, they would dismiss it as some grand fantasy or dream.

They'd been driving for a few minutes when Pen looked around and thought to wonder where Ryan was taking him for dinner. His stomach twisted when Ryan smiled again and told him. "I thought we'd go to my place. I already have a delivery scheduled, and I always get enough to have a few days of leftovers. Don't worry, there'll be plenty."

Ryan loved the expressions of awe and longing Pen displayed, most likely unconsciously, about his car. His grandparents and parents had split the cost of the car for his last birthday. It still amazed him and he got to drive it almost every day. As a kid, he'd had pictures of every single model of Mustang on his walls, but the '69s were always his favourite, particularly the Mach 1. Trust his dad to remember that and get the retro model that matched. There were lots of functions he didn't use, but that didn't matter. He'd use them all right now if Pen asked him to.

When he told Pen they would eat at his place, the expression changed to something he couldn't decipher. The blond nodded slowly as he turned to look out the side window. Maybe taking Pen home wasn't a good idea. It did seem kind of sudden, now that he thought about it, but it wasn't as though they were complete strangers. They'd first met about sixteen years ago, even if their contact had been extremely limited in that time. Ryan could only remember five actual meetings off the top of his head.

"Is that all right with you? Having dinner at my place, I mean."

He received a long look before getting an answer. "Yeah, that's fine, Ryan. Hmm, this looks kind of familiar. I think I've been here before."

"Maybe that's because Joey and Harvey live here. They're my next door neighbours and are the ones that asked me to look into your, um, situation with Alex."

"Yeah, we visited Joey once, so that must be it." Pen chewed on his bottom lip for a moment, frowning slightly. "Neither one of them spoke more than two words to me whenever we were together. I think 'Hello' and 'Goodbye' was the extent of the conversation."

"Do you think maybe that could be because of Alex? Joey mentioned that they never really knew your name, only that Alex said it was P. It might be he warned them not to talk with you too much."

Pen shrugged and waited for the engine to turn off. The seatbelt retracted automatically once the engine was off, which made him smile again. He stood on the sidewalk until Ryan reached his side and walked with him into the building.

It was immediately apparent that this building had been gutted and completely remodelled. The plain brick façade didn't match the elegant wood of the foyer. Pen remembered being here now. Unless he was mistaken, the twin elevators were located to the right of the reception desk, the doors camouflaged by wood panelling that matched the rest of the walls. He remembered that he'd thought it very clever. The blues and greens were also very lovely against the dark wood and cream accents.

The interior of Ryan's apartment made Pen smile. It was so empty. There were no pictures on the walls, and very little on the shelves, except for some books and movie discs. The couch and chair were bare of throws or pillows. He looked carefully, but couldn't find any sign of a computer or even a hand screen anywhere. It was a little disconcerting. Pen always thought he was the only one that didn't have those technologies cluttering up every surface. Nowadays, people displayed their technology and hid their books away, if they even had any.

"Obviously this is the living room. Joey and Harvey live right on the other side of this wall," he told her, gesturing towards the left. "Right here is the kitchen. I love that there's a shuttered window between the kitchen and living room. Over there is the hall for the rest of the apartment. First door on the left is a guest room, first on the right is the laundry room. Second door on the left is the master bedroom, second on the right is the bathroom. At the end of the hall is a large storage area." 

"It's nice. The living room and kitchen are really a great size." The lack of any kind of decorating made the rooms seem twice as big as they were.

"Yeah, all the rooms are really huge. The bathroom could be half its current size and still be considered big. You want something to drink? I have wine, beer, juice, soda and some cold water in the fridge."

Pen turned and caught the way Ryan was looking at him. It was a struggle to keep his expression smooth as he realized that look as interest. Not 'I'm interested in what you have to say' but 'I'm interested in finding out what you look like naked'. His heart began to beat a little quicker and he moved towards the window to put some space between them.

"Water for now. I'll save the wine for dinner."

He sat down in the chair while Ryan got the water. The couch looked comfortable, but he didn't want to take the chance of Ryan sitting next to him. That might prove to be too much for Pen to handle. Now that the idea of having a crush on the man was in his mind, it was difficult to get rid of it. If they were in close proximity to each other, he might give away his feelings and that would prove embarrassing, no matter the look he got earlier.

Ryan moved with easy and confident grace. Pen watched him as he went about getting them both drinks and felt jealous. Had Pen ever been able to move so easily with his head held high? Try as he might, he couldn't recall a time where he wasn't aware that he needed caution when interacting with people, even the members of his family. Except for his father when he was a child. That had changed as well.

As though reading his thoughts, Ryan asked the question when he arrived with the drinks. "Does your father live here in Rutherford as well?"

"No. My father is dead. He died a little over two years ago."

"Died?" Ryan leaned forward in surprise at the news. "It's strange to hear of a nightwalker dying. How did that happen?"

"He tried to break the binding. It was horrible. I-I was there, and saw everything. Do you know how a nightwalker dies, when they break the binding?" He waited to see just what Ryan knew about it. There weren't any reports of that kind of thing happened. Pen had researched after it happened, and again while working on his report on daywalkers for class.

"No, I haven't a clue. Can you tell me?"

"Almost as soon as his fangs broke the skin on his victim's neck, he pulled back and started screaming. The sound was just, well, inhuman. I think the easiest way to describe what happened next would be to say it is what you might imagine if a nightwalker walked out into the midday sun. There was smoke coming from his mouth, nose, ears, and even his eyes. The smell was so strong it nearly burned my nose.

"Everyone around was screaming and running, but I couldn't move. I couldn't tear my eyes away. Dad's skin began to blacken and smoulder, and almost before I realized it, he collapsed in on himself and fell to the ground, nothing but a pile of dust.

"Dad had invited me to meet him in a favourite restaurant of ours and that's where it happened. He wanted to die, and he wanted to have witnesses around. I went through his apartment so many times afterwards, trying to find some clue about why. There was nothing to find, though. I sold everything and have tried to forget."




Walking in Daylight Ch. 03



"I'm so sorry, Pen. I wish..."

His hand reached out to wipe away the single tear that spilled from the gorgeous green eyes. The skin of the pale cheek was so soft beneath his fingers, satin smooth. The few male cheeks he'd touched before weren't so smooth and soft. It fascinated Ryan so much that he gently touched the rest of the face, tracing from the forehead, down the temple to the jaw and chin. Pen's lips parted as his breathing sped up and Ryan took the opportunity to touch those as well, ghosting over the sensual fullness.

Though he wanted to push his fingers into the blond hair, the impulse was curbed by the arrival of their dinner. Ryan blinked and pulled back quickly, surprised by his actions, before hurrying to answer the door. What had come over him? It felt like he was taking advantage of a young man who didn't need any more complications in his life.

Glancing back quickly to see Pen, he noticed the features of the delicate face were pale and drawn. To give him time to compose himself, Ryan bade Pen stay in the living room to relax while he set the table and dished up the food. Candles would be nice, but that might be a bit much right now.

He was learning so much about himself. Until seeing Pen again, he'd thought that dinner with a woman meant wine, roses, and candles, while dinner with a man was just food, beer and sports on the television. That wasn't the case tonight. Ryan wanted to give Pen everything, all the romance and attention he had in him. It was strange and disconcerting. It felt right.

When all was ready, Ryan started to call Pen in, only to find the younger man leaning in the doorway. There was a light blush across the fine cheekbones and it looked very attractive.

"Do you want to see? What Alex did after you talked to him the other day, I mean?" Ryan stilled at Pen's question.

"Only if you want to show me. Only if you're comfortable enough with me."

Long, slender fingers slowly undid the buttons on the white shirt. When the edges parted, Ryan sucked in his breath. They were old, but bruises covered the abdomen, barely leaving a hint of the pale skin. Pen presented his back and allowed the short to fall from his shoulders, showing off those marks. The bruises varied in colour from a yellowish-green to almost black. The worst of the bruising was around the kidneys and lower back.

"God, doesn't it hurt? You must be in agony!"

Pen looked at him, head tilted to the side as he did up the shirt once more. His expression was almost puzzled. "No, little twinges now and then, but nothing terrible. I've had much worse. I didn't show you for pity or sympathy, Ryan. I showed you so you would know that, well, this is what my life is. I'm used to it. The worst was, of course, the beating at the school, even though that wasn't the first time. It wasn't even the first time I was in the hospital. What Alex did, what any of my boyfriends did, isn't a big deal. I showed you so you would know that you don't need to ride in and save me.

"Alex is gone now, but some day, eventually, there will be someone new in my life. All will be good in the beginning, full of promises of love and caring, which will become fists and kicks and insults. I'm used to it, it's what I know, and it's likely what I deserve. Don't think that it should be your job or even your business to interfere in my life. You'd probably only make things worse. When you chose not to believe me that day, it didn't turn my life into this, Ryan. You're not responsible for any of it."

"You don't deserve it Pen! For God's sake, nobody deserves to be treated like that. What you deserve is to be loved and pampered and treated with respect! I would never, ever hurt you like that." His cheeks heated at his declaration, though he wasn't sure if it was because he was angry at the accepting attitude or because he spoke of being closer to the young blond.

"There won't be a chance for you to either hurt or not hurt me, Ryan. Besides, there are things that hurt more than a jab to the kidneys, you know. Come on, you promised me dinner and coffee, and I'm starting to get hungry."

Neither one spoke very much while they ate the Chinese take-out. Ryan thought about both the injuries he'd seen and the soft-spoken rebuke to his words. Apparently, Pen was not open to there being anything between them other than this meal. It made him feel sad and lonely. He wished he could think of something to say to change Pen's mind about how he deserved to be treated. Until the right thing came to him, he would just have to keep his own counsel. Actions spoke louder than words, anyway, so maybe that would be the best way to go.

The wine was all gone by the time the two returned to the living room with their cups of coffee. Ryan frowned and tried to remember drinking it. He must have drunk most of it, because he could only remember filling Pen's glass twice, only halfway at that. His companion was talking about his recent move, his voice so soft and low. Without thinking, he blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"You're very beautiful, Pen. I've always thought so, even the first time I met you and you were sitting on the grass."

Pen looked over at him speculatively, as though trying to discover if he was being truthful or not, so Ryan kept his eyes fixed on the green ones. A soft smile curved the full lips after a moment. "You want to kiss me? You can, you know. All you have to do is move a little closer and do it."

With a groan, Ryan complied, unable to resist any longer. This was the person who showed him that he was interested in men as well as women. If not for Pen, he wouldn't have figured out what it was that was missing from his life. His cock filled up quickly, eager for the touch Ryan waited for. Those lips opened sweetly beneath his, letting him in. He could taste their meal and the wine inside the hot mouth. Pen slid his tongue alongside, not so much engaging him as encouraging.

Hearing the low moan, Ryan pulled the smaller man up against him. Pen straddled his legs and held onto his face, fingers moving up and down in a slow caress. Groin to groin, the two of them began to rock together, both of them hard and starting to breathe harder. Ryan opened his eyes and looked at the beautiful face. Those green eyes were dark with passion now and held a hint of mischief.

Without warning, Pen wriggled down Ryan's body, going to his knees between long, strong legs. Agile fingers worked at the trousers, hurrying to open them and get to the prize inside. He leaned forward and pressed his face to the cotton underwear, taking in the scent of aroused male. With a small tap, Pen encouraged Ryan to lift up so he could get the pants and underwear down.

"Oh, that's really nice," he breathed, eyes fixed on the long prick, thick enough that one of his hands would barely reach around. "I need to taste that."

"Taste it. Whatever you want."

Tasting could come soon enough. First, Pen wanted to just examine and memorize the look of it. This was his one night with Ryan and he didn't want to rush it. He traced a fingertip from the thick curls, a couple shades darker than on Ryan's head because they weren't in contact with the sun, up to the tip. He followed the most prominent vein, smiling at the shiver that resulted. When his finger finished the journey, he ran it through the moisture that decorated the slit and brought it to his mouth. God it was delicious!

Resisting that taste proved impossible. Leaning forward, Pen licked around the head while he pumped his hand, urging more liquid to seep out. While he teased, he tried to determine how best to administer the blowjob. There was no way he could take more than maybe half into his mouth, but he wanted this to be amazing for Ryan.

His thoughts whirled as he licked and kissed his way down the steely shaft to the balls. Pen wet the sack thoroughly, taking his time by using only the tip of his tongue, dragging it everywhere again and again. "Damn, Pen, please...it's so...I need..." That babble was just wonderful. It proved that he was doing a good job, but there was so much more he wanted to do. Without warning, Pen finally sucked one of the balls into his mouth, sucking and licking it before letting it pop out. The other received the same treatment.

Ryan's hips bucked up and one of his hands automatically moved to caress the top of the head between his legs. He was careful not to use force to direct Pen where he most wanted the attention of that hot, sweet mouth. He couldn't remember ever being so aroused, and that mouth hadn't even wrapped around his cock yet.

Even while he thought that, moist, wet heat glided over his shaft. Fuck! No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop the thrusts. His eyes wouldn't open either, rolling into the back of his head with every move Pen made. That boy's mouth was nothing short of magical!

I want this to last. I want something to remember. Pen took as much of the hard cock into his mouth as he could, then wrapped one hand right below his lips. As he pulled back up, sucking hard, that hand followed. He came off completely, but the hand continued until his palm rubbed over the tip. Then he went back down as far as he could again. Pen whimpered as he continued in this manner for a few minutes, loving the gasps and cries of the man he wanted to pleasure.

"Fucking Hell! That's the best. Fuck. Nobody's ever done me so good. Pen, fuck! Again. Oh shit."

The pace increased bit by bit. Pen switched hands and dropped the hand lubricated with spit and pre come to rub at the soft, sensitive spot behind Ryan's balls. It didn't take long before the massage and suction made Ryan shout and snap his hips forward, pushing the long prick further into his mouth. 

He gagged slightly, but recovered quickly enough to swallow each spurt of come. Some dripped out of the corner of his mouth, but he didn't mind. It was even more delicious than he'd expected, not too thick or bitter. It was the first time he'd enjoyed the taste so much.

Satisfied with both the experience and the vague murmurs he heard from Ryan, Pen laid his head on the muscular stomach and pressed open-mouthed kisses to the skin there. His hair was stroked for a few moments, but it soon stopped. He waited a bit before lifting his head to see Ryan fast asleep. Pen dared a kiss on that lovely mouth, just a soft touch that wouldn't awaken Ryan. It was time for him to go.

Quietly he went to the shelf and took down an album he'd looked at earlier, while Ryan prepared their dinner. He removed the only two pictures inside and dropped the empty album on nearby chair. In the kitchen, he found some paper and pens and scribbled a quick note, which he tucked into the album. It wasn't what he wanted to say. He wanted to tell the man how happy he was that they'd seen each other again, and that he thought Ryan was wonderful. That wasn't what was best, however.

With a sad sigh, he slipped out of the apartment and came face to face with Joey. "Um, hey. What...I mean, how are you doing?"

"P! Well, Pen I guess. Ryan told me your name. How are you doing?"

"I'm good, away from Alex is good. I just wish you hadn't said anything to Ryan. Alex was very, um, upset about that visit, and I was only a day or two away from leaving him anyway." Joey bit his lip and smiled his apology.

"I was just so worried about you. Harvey was too. I was so glad when Ryan told me that you'd moved out and left Alex, you have no idea. Harvey left me, though, before I found out, but I know he'd be happy too."

Pen opened his mouth to say how sorry he was, but Joey waved a hand to stop him. "Don't worry about it. I'm off on a trip for work, which will take my mind off things. How about we get together for lunch when I get back? Here's my number and you give me a call next weekend to work something out."

After a hug and kiss, they parted company. Pen couldn't help but wonder what had happened between the two, since they'd seemed so in love and together. After a moment, however, his thoughts went back to the note he left in the apartment, hoping it wasn't a mistake.

I hope you got what you wanted from me, Ryan. I've taken the pictures you have of me, because they're mine. You had no right to keep them. Stay away from me. Don't try to contact me and don't look up information on me. I just want to be left alone. Thanks for dinner. Pen.



Walking in Daylight Ch. 04



I want to thank you all again for the wonderful comments I've received on the previous chapters. I'm pretty sure there will be only one more chapter after this one.

Please keep up with the comments, and anything negative, please keep constructive!

~~~~~~~

Every day since his dinner with Pen, Ryan checked the logs as soon as he got to the office, to see if anything came in that related to Pen. The note left in his apartment seemed to indicate that Pen felt obligated to, well, to service him. He thought about his words, and while he couldn't think of anything off-hand, perhaps all the wine he drank with dinner played with his memory somewhat.

Then there were the pictures. He knew that he often looked at them, but until they were gone, he never realized just how much it happened. At least twice a day found him reaching for the album and sometimes it was more often than that.

"Hey Ryan."

"Carlie, are you just getting in now?" Ryan saw that his partner still had her briefcase and car keys in her hand.

"Nah, I've been upstairs and logged in already. When this call came in though, I grabbed it. I knew you'd want to be the one to follow up." She handed over the request sheet from reception. "I'd say we should be the last ones to go, if I thought it would do any good."

Penlan Taylor.

The report said that Penlan Taylor was attacked outside an all-night restaurant some time after midnight. He went home after something scared away the attacker and called a friend, Joey Compton, who called it in to the FDPA in the morning, against the victim's wishes.

Ryan took a deep breath. He could handle this. It would seem strange for him to refuse to go after looking for Pen for a month. He just didn't really want their meeting to be in an official capacity. Carlie had their workstation clone in her briefcase, so he followed his partner down to the car.

The address was in an area of town he hadn't visited yet, other than his initial run-through to get acquainted. They pulled up to a duplex and Ryan was impressed. It wasn't very large, but it stood on a larger-than-average plot, which meant the neighbours weren't too close. Flowerbeds lined the front of both sides of the duplex, empty now even though spring was fast approaching. Everything was very neat and clean. It was a wonderful place for Pen to live.

Joey opened the door and smiled at him. "Ryan! I'm glad you're the one who came."

"Thanks, Joey. This is my partner, Agent Carlie Simmonds. Could we see Pen, so we can take his statement on the attack?"

"Yeah, the thing is," he paused and looked over his shoulder with a grimace. "The thing is Pen didn't want me to call. He really doesn't want to have anyone see him. Come on in. Maybe you'll have more luck getting him out of the kitchen."

Ryan looked around in interest. The apartment was very nicely furnished, colourful without being too much. They were currently in the living room, with a couch and armchair in brown leather, and a recliner in burgundy leather. Cream-coloured throw cushions sat on both the couch and chairs about. The pattern of the area rug, lying beneath the coffee table, contained those three colours. Pictures covered the walls, many different genres but somehow going together. An entire wall held shelves held books and various knick-knacks.

Joey gestured towards a door to show where the kitchen was, and where Pen was hiding. It was an old-fashioned door, with a crystal knob and keyhole underneath. It was entirely made of frosted glass panes, except for a six-inch border all around. Ryan could see shadows through it, but that was all.

"Pen? Pen, it's Ryan. I'm here with my partner, Agent Simmonds. Joey called us about your attack. Won't you come out here and talk to me? Us?"

"It wasn't really an attack. Nobody hit me or anything like that." Ryan heard a heavy sigh. "I just...it was late and I got nervous, so I called Joey to come over. It wasn't anything to do with me or because I'm a daywalker half-breed. I'm not injured, not even a bruise I didn't already have. Honest."

Joey stepped forward, speaking with a soft voice. "And what about what he took from you? That isn't right, Pen. Come on out, it's all right. Show them."

"Oh, well, yes, he took something from me, but really, it isn't that important in the scheme of things."

Carlie decided it was her turn to try. "Mr. Taylor, Pen, please come out here. I'd really like to know what's happened. Right now, it sounds quite mysterious and my curiosity is piqued. This person didn't really attack you, didn't harm you, and yet took something that makes you want to hide away. Please."

Pen asked for a few minutes, promising that he would be out soon. He inquired if anyone wanted drinks and they all asked for coffee. Making their drinks would give him the time to get ready to come out.

Ryan asked Joey what was going on, but he didn't get an answer. Joey just told him that it was something he had to see for himself. While it wasn't bad, he told them, it was just something personal that nobody had a right to take without asking. Even if no one was injured.

The kitchen door opened and Pen stepped out slowly, holding a tray with their drinks. He fixed his eyes on the floor as he approached them. Ryan saw a blush stain the cheeks that were normally pale and flawless. His breath caught in his throat when he realized what the attacker took from Pen. The memory of all their past encounters paraded through his mind as he simply stared.

"Oh Pen. He cut your hair."

The hair that had hung down the slender back was now a riot of curls that left the graceful neck bare. Ryan always knew that the golden white hair, previously a mix of straight and waved strands, would curl if cut short and this was the proof. It was clear that Pen didn't like his new look, appearing embarrassed. 

Ryan smiled slightly and reached out a hand to gently touch the curls. "It doesn't look bad. Different, but it looks fine."

"I feel kind of. I've never had or wanted short hair. The shortest I've ever had it was at my shoulder blades, and I thought that was bad." The small man shrugged slightly, his eyes flickering up for a moment before returning to their study of the floor. "Hair grows back and it's really no big deal."

Carlie's phone rang and she stepped away to answer it. Ryan could feel the distress coming from Pen, even though it didn't show on his face. "We have another call, Ry. It's nothing major so I'll go handle it while you finish up here."

Joey said he had to call in to work to say he would be late, but Pen insisted he go in, that he would be fine. It wasn't long before the two men were alone. Pen broke the uncomfortable silence by setting the tray down on the coffee table and gesturing for Ryan to sit. He then talked about the incident. He left the MedLabs at just after one in the morning, since he was working there part-time during inventory. Some other people he worked with wanted to stop at a restaurant for something to eat, and he agreed.

He fell behind a bit because he needed to check his messages. His landlady was supposed to call during the evening, and his cell was off while he worked in the lab. A man grabbed hold of Pen's hair as he was about to enter the restaurant. Telling him not to fight, the man started to pull him off to the side. That's when one of his co-workers shouted from the doorway and his attacker cursed, pulled out a knife and cut his hair.

+++

Pen felt so naked without his long hair. Every few minutes he had to stop himself from reaching up to twine his fingers in it. He looked cute for fuck's sake. When he bent his head forward, there was no curtain of hair to hide his face. Now he was alone with Ryan and he felt exposed. After quitting his job so Ryan couldn't find him, it didn't seem fair that this had to happen and bring the man right back into his life.

Every night he remembered the taste, feel, and sound of Ryan. With his past, Pen rarely felt the urge to touch himself or relieve sexual tension. That was all he could think about for the past month though. It wasn't just at night, either. If he thought about Ryan, or saw something that reminded him of the man even slightly, he felt himself harden. Dealing with a hard on at work was getting more difficult every day. Thank God, nobody had noticed. Or at least mentioned it to him.

While he related the facts of the attack, Pen tried and failed to keep his eyes off Ryan's face. The agent was being all business, thankfully, writing down his account in a small notebook. He actually used pen and paper, which kept his attention there rather than on where Pen's eyes were.

"Was the voice familiar at all?"

Pen felt like his face had caught on fire. Ryan looked up to ask the question and caught his eyes. "No. No, he didn't sound familiar." Damn, Pen didn't even recognize his own voice at the moment. It sounded both choked and breathy, which shouldn't even be possible.

Before he could make a fool of himself and throw himself at Ryan, Pen jumped to his feet and hurried to stand at a window. Why was this happening to him? Just because he acknowledged that he had a crush on the man didn't mean he didn't have any self-control. Ryan should remind him of all his past boyfriends, not banish them from his mind. He'd sworn to himself that he wouldn't even think of getting involved with anyone unless they were the total opposite to this man. Right now, he was definitely thinking of getting involved, and more, with hunky Ryan Sealey.

The warm weight of Ryan's hand on his shoulder made him whimper and try to move, but there was nowhere to go. Pen turned slowly and lifted his head, but kept his eyes fixed off to the side.

"I didn't expect anything from you, Pen. I'm sorry if anything I said or did made you think that."

"Y-you had pictures of me." Pen had to ask the question that had bothered him since the moment he opened that album, even though he'd barely acknowledged his fears to himself. It was almost the hardest thing he'd ever had to do. "Did you like...well. Tony used to like to have pictures of when I was hurt. It kind of, um, turned him on. Is that why you kept it?"

The confused expression on Ryan's face seemed to last an eternity. Pen then saw the man pale as the meaning sank in. "Oh! No! No, no, no that isn't why I kept it. Jesus! I kept it to remind me of my stupidity. Because of me, because I couldn't believe my brother would do something like that, you were hurt."

"It would have happened even if you had believed me. Benjie had already sent out the pictures. Believing me over your brother wouldn't have changed a thing. If they couldn't get me at school, they would have cornered me somewhere else. I'd pretty much accepted the way everyone in town treated me by the time I was ten, Ryan.

"Rutherford is a lot better, but I'm still not accepted everywhere. Daywalkers don't like me because I'm part nightwalker; nightwalkers really don't like me because I'm part daywalker; and the normal people don't like me because I'm a half-breed. I've learned by now where to go, and where not to go. It's my life, I've accepted it."

"You shouldn't have to accept it!"

Pen jumped back a bit at the way Ryan shouted. He knew that tone of voice. He knew the angry look that went with that voice, too. As unobtrusively as possible, Pen pressed back against the wall beside the window, hands flat on the surface and face turned down and to the side. Usually he would have his hair to cover his face, to hide that he wasn't really there in the moment. His mind disconnected from his body, waiting for what would happen to see how deep inside it needed to go.

Ryan didn't hit him or grab him. Pen moved his eyes slowly and saw Ryan just standing there, eyes sadly watching him. Had anyone ever looked at him that way? Maybe the nurses looked at him like that when he was in the hospital, but he hadn't felt it then. It was their job to be compassionate, so he regarded that expression as part of a mask they pulled on before entering a room. Here, now, the expression told him that his reaction actually hurt Ryan; that Ryan felt bad for having frightened him.

I'M SORRY! Pen didn't know if he screamed those words out loud or only in his head. Without thinking, he launched himself against Ryan, his entire body trembling. He didn't cry. He couldn't remember the last time he'd cried; just as he couldn't remember the last time he'd laughed or even smiled a real smile. Strong arms wrapped around him, warm and safe. The feeling made him shake even harder.

The next thing Pen knew, he opened his eyes to find himself lying on the couch, covered with the old quilt from the bedroom. Disoriented, he sat up and looked around, a bit disappointed to find himself alone. A glass of water sat on the table, with a piece of paper propped up against it.

Ryan apologized for having to return to work and asked if he could return for dinner, since his shift ended at six. Ryan actually apologized for leaving. There was a phone number at the bottom, with instructions to call as soon as Pen woke up. He knew he should throw away the note. He should stick to his resolve to stay as far away from Ryan as possible. It was the right thing to do, and yet he found himself reaching over for his cell.

In a last attempt to protect himself, Pen decided on a little test. He was actually pleased when a recorded voice asked him to leave a message. "Ryan, it's Pen. I think I'd like to have dinner with you. I feel like eating out tonight, so I'll head over to 'Popular Eats', at the corner of 14th and Granville, for seven. I hope you'll meet me there, but if not, that's all right too."

Now all he had to do was decide on what to wear.

+++

Damn, damn, damn. Ryan quickly checked his watch and saw that, just like the last time he'd checked, he was nearly an hour late to meet Pen. Of all days for there to be a last minute meeting called, this had to be the worst. He couldn't even blow it off, since it was to discuss options on working with the local police.

There were still problems arising when calls came in about daywalkers or daywalker addresses. Ryan had brought up the problem, so he had to attend. A parking spot opened up just two buildings down from the diner and he pulled in, blessing this little piece of luck. He smoothed back his hair, wishing he had been able to run home to shower and change his clothes.

All afternoon he remembered Pen and the way he had reacted. The sight of the small, beautiful young man, just waiting to be hit, was like a kick in the stomach. Worse was that Pen didn't even show so much fear as resignation. Ryan stopped himself from grabbing Pen up in a hug only because he was afraid of really frightening him. He was pleased when Pen trusted him enough to seek comfort in his arms and then fall asleep. He'd stayed for nearly an hour, stroking the soft curls, feeling bad that their length was gone. He truly didn't mind, but Pen did and it was Pen's feelings that mattered.

Entering the diner, Ryan immediately saw Pen. He sat alone at a table, his back to the wall, just finishing his meal. Dressed in a loose green shirt and black jeans, Pen looked amazing. The top two buttons were undone to reveal pale skin and just a hint of a bruise. The younger man was so good looking he could be called beautiful. He also looked so fragile that Ryan again wondered how anyone could want to harm him.

Pen looked up as Ryan reached the table, his green eyes veiled of any emotion. "I didn't really expect you to show up, Ryan. Sorry, but I have to go now and change for work."

"They called a last-minute meeting at work. Just really bad timing."

"You don't need to explain anything to me," Pen shrugged. "A call might have been nice, but it doesn't mat.... Oh just fucking wonderful. Hello, Malcolm."

"Pretty Princess Penlan! My God, what the hell did you do to your hair? You should have left it long, gives a man something to grab onto while fucking your face." The blond man, taller than Pen but shorter than Ryan, turned cold blue eyes to Ryan. "Listen man, just a word of warning, from one guy to another. Our little princess here will work you up real good, but forget about getting into that tight ass. Fucking little prude is all promise with no delivery."

Pen blushed bright red in embarrassment at the words. "Shut up, Malcolm. Agent Sealey doesn't care about my tight ass one way or the other."

"Agent Sealey? What the fuck?"

"Agent Ryan Sealey, of the Federal Daywalker Protection Agency. Mr. Taylor, would you like to press harassment charges against Mr. -?" Ryan took out his notebook, wishing he could just use his fist on the smug bastard.

"His name is Malcolm Trent, and no, I don't want to press charges. He isn't worth the time or effort. If you'll both excuse me, I need to get to work."

Ryan was sure that only he and the woman at the register saw the shaking hand when Pen went to pay. Ryan stood and waited for him, while making sure the other man left and wasn't loitering outside to cause trouble. He couldn't help it if his eyes kept going to the sweetly curved ass encased in tight black jeans. Lifting his eyes didn't help, because he became transfixed by the sight of a slender neck usually kept hidden behind a cascade of light hair.

He had to get a grip on himself. Not only was his mind stuck on the fantastic blowjob Pen gave him a month ago, but now he had visions cupping and kissing the tight ass in question. Ryan knew he had never wanted anyone, man or woman, as much as he wanted Pen. Best to get outside in the fresh air before he completely lost control. Thank goodness his suit jacket was long enough to hide the bulge in his trousers.

While waiting by the car, Ryan cast his mind back to see if any of his past relationships ever made him feel this way. He was with Amelia the longest, but even at the beginning the emotions on both their parts was more friendship and comfort than lust and love. His most intense relationship, if short lived, was with Derrick. That occurred about a month or so after Pen's attack and disappearance. Of course, that was when he'd discovered he could have feelings for a man and the curiosity drove him. After almost two full days in bed, they parted company as friends and hardly ever saw each other again.

He was so deep in thought that he almost missed Pen. Calling out, he blocked the sidewalk so Pen would have to talk to him. "Let me give you a ride home so we can have a bit of time to talk. I'll even drive you to work after. Please."

"I don't know. I just don't know." Worried emerald eyes looked into warm golden ones. There were traces of pain and sadness there, but also of longing. "All right, Ryan. Take me home."

+++

What was he thinking? Pen chewed nervously at his lower lip as they drove in silence back to his home. He should be trying to get rid of Ryan, not accepting his presence at every turn. When Ryan didn't show up on time for dinner, Pen once again vowed that he wouldn't give in again, that he would stand firm. Two minutes in the man's company and he let the man take him home.

He didn't want to fight anymore. Whatever happened would happen without his interference. Only with respect to Ryan, he amended to himself. Other men, if there ever were any, would have dark colouring and would have to prove themselves before he let his guard down with them. It might be unfair to some very nice guys, but he couldn't put himself in harms way anymore. He just couldn't do it.

Pen's thoughts wandered back to the encounter with Malcolm in the diner. That had been terribly embarrassing, having him say all those things to Ryan. What kind of person went around telling intimate details in such a crude manner? Pen knew that Malcolm, and all his other boyfriends, couldn't understand his reluctance to let them have his ass, and there was no way that he could explain it to them. He couldn't very well tell them that he was halfway in love with a man who looked like them and didn't even think of Pen in that way.




Walking in Daylight Ch. 04



Except maybe he did.

Hadn't Ryan kept that picture of him? The one that showed him sitting on Matt Cameron's cock, head thrown back from the pleasurable feelings running through him. Nobody knew that his mind had replaced Matt's features for Ryan's. Pen hadn't ever really acknowledged it to himself until Ryan came back into his life and reminded Pen of his feelings.

That night, that wonderful night a month ago, Ryan had called him beautiful and had kissed him, even though Pen gave permission. It was all so confusing. His entire life was a big mass of confusion that consistently sent him down the wrong path. Pen decided that he would try to be as honest as he could with Ryan, and that meant that a confession was in order. Oh, not about the depth of his feelings, or anything like that, but about some other things, beginning with the note he'd left.

"Ryan, I'm sorry about the note I left you. It was unfair of me. I was just trying to protect myself. My luck with men, well my luck in general if I'm honest, is terrible and I'm so tired. When I found those pictures of me, I let my fears overwhelm me and judged you without having all the facts."

Ryan didn't answer until he'd parked the car in front of the duplex, leaving Pen to wonder what he would have to say. "I would never intentionally hurt you, Pen. I hate that you think you deserve the treatment you've received. It isn't right. You don't deserve it, nobody deserves it."

"What else am I supposed to believe? From my earliest memory, I've been beaten, humiliated and treated with scorn. My father was nice and understanding, but I only ever saw him a couple of hours a day, and he spent the majority of those hours trying to keep my mother away from me. Other than that, my cousins were wonderful when I would see them twice a year for a day or two each time. You were also kind, although sometimes two or three years could go by without our paths crossing." Pen stopped and left the car, silently inviting Ryan to follow. He waited until they were inside before starting again.

"I met Matt, the boy in the pictures, and he was nice enough. He was only visiting with my cousin, though. Little hints here and there and we discovered that both of us liked boys rather than girls. The visit was over before Benjie's threats came out. I never saw or heard from him again, although I didn't expect to. Then we moved to Rutherford."

Pen got some drinks before going on. Ryan tried to say something, as he had a few times before, and Pen waved him to silence. "Things were wonderful here in Rutherford in the beginning. While I was healing, the only place I really went was the doctor's office, and the weekly physical therapy sessions for my leg were right there. That's where I met Grant. We dated and he was kind and sweet, so very understanding. Until I told him I wasn't ready to...be intimate. Once I made it clear I wouldn't waver on that until I was ready, he turned mean.

"When I finally left him, or rather when I escaped him, I stayed home again with my father. Then I met Malcolm. Same thing, although by then I figured if I could learn to give a good blowjob, maybe he wouldn't mind so much. It was always the same thing, though, with Malcolm and everyone else I met after that. As kind and wonderful as they are in the beginning, when they realized it would proceed to the next level only at my discretion and not theirs, it turned ugly. I stayed longer each time, waiting until I had enough money to get another place to stay. I really loved a few of those places, but I gave them up to avoid the hassle.

"Anyways, all that to say, I must deserve to be treated this way. There has to be something about me that pushes the people I let close, or who should be close, to turn to violence. My cousins stopped being nice when they learned the person in the photos, even though he remained anonymous, was someone they knew. They told me never to call again. The only person who's ever been consistently nice to me is you."

Ryan reached over and cupped his cheek. Pen closed his eyes and let himself feel the warmth. It wouldn't be too bad to just pretend for a bit, right? He should be able by now to take the good when it was available and still be prepared for when the soft caresses became to painful blows. Deep inside, however, Pen was afraid. Not afraid that the blows would come, but afraid that they wouldn't.

"From what you said, your father was also a good person for you to be around. He was always kind to you."

"Who do you think he attacked to break the binding?" Pen tilted his head and pointed out the two scars on the side of his neck. "He invited me to a restaurant only to jump on me and sink his fangs into my neck."

Pen didn't want to, but he forced himself to look directly into Ryan's eyes. Surely by now the man would realize that it was pointless to keep coming around and would leave. What he saw, however, made everything inside freeze. The golden eyes were blazing with disbelieving fury. Pen somehow knew that this time, the emotion wasn't directed at him. He didn't know HOW he knew, but he did. That anger was there for what had been done to him.

Desperate hope filled Pen up and for once, he didn't try to get rid of it. Ryan would never strike out at him. Ryan would never try to force him into that one act of sex Pen wasn't prepared for. If Ryan said it was Pen's decision, then it really would be. Pen experienced that certainty and mentally hugged it tight.

The alarm on his watch reminded him he needed to leave for work and he jumped to his feet. On the way to his room, Pen shrugged out of his shirt to exchange it for a plain white one. From behind him, he heard a short curse and turned to find Ryan on his feet, staring at him.

"What the hell happened to your back?"

Pen groaned as he realized Ryan would see the needle marks marching up his spine. "No, it's all right. I'm involved in one of the clinical trials down at MedLabs, that's all. It's a new vaccine, but during the tests they want to give very small amounts only, to keep any negative reactions down. That's why there are so many. Only about two or three left and then I'm done. It's fine, Ryan, don't worry."

He didn't know that there were bright red and black marks radiating out from each injection site. He didn't see how swollen said injection sites were. When Ryan pointed that out, Pen only shrugged and said the doctors would see in just a bit and would be able to tell him if it was normal or not. Ryan looked uneasy but dropped it and Pen gave him a bright smile.

His first smile in longer than he could remember.



Walking in Daylight Ch. 05



Here is the final chapter. I hope everyone has enjoyed reading about Pen and Ryan, and that the conclusion isn't a disappointment.

I want to thank you all for your comments, your encouragement has been wonderful. I hope to get lots more comments now that the story is finished, along with your votes, to let me know what you think.

Other ideas are brewing in my head, and I hope to get them written in the near future.

-------

Penlan slammed the door to the duplex behind him, glad that Mr. and Mrs. Casher next door had left earlier in the week for a two-week trip to Europe. Other than that action, however, nobody would guess there was anything wrong from his expression. Inside, ah, inside he felt like he was shaking apart.

The past six months with Ryan were the happiest of his life. He learned to smile and laugh from happiness, rather than as an appropriate response to what happened around him. He remembered two weeks ago, as he tried to explain to Ryan how he felt. "It's as though I've been wrapped in a bubble of darkness and now I'm finally walking in daylight."

Too soon. Pen knew he had spoken too soon. He should have known better than to let his guard down. He did know better but chose to ignore that knowledge. Now that bubble was back and the darkness was deeper and more suffocating than ever before. The worst part was how familiar the darkness was; how it almost welcomed him back like a long-lost friend. 'You're back now,' it seemed to say, 'back where you belong.'

Pen pushed himself away from the door. There were things to do and he needed to get them done right away. No point in delaying the inevitable. He moved towards the bedroom, stopping only for a moment at the hall closet to grab a box. Everything he could find that belonged to Ryan he tossed into the box. There wasn't much, since Ryan never spent the night, but there were some items scattered around the apartment. Since there wasn't much in the box, Pen went ahead and put in those things Ryan gave him during their time together.

Next, Pen fetched the trash bin from the bathroom and tossed the scented candles, test kit and lube he'd bought, since his plan was to finally seduce Ryan tonight. What a fool he'd been, grinning and humming as he set things up to be 'perfect'.

Pen then found his old suitcases and packed a week's worth of clothing, his toiletries, and a couple of books. He added the emergency cash he kept in the apartment and carried the bags to the entrance. All he needed to do now was to call a cab and toss the box of Ryan's belongings out on the front step. He considered leaving a note and then decided against it. A simple 'Leave your key' scrawled on the box was good enough.

Pen decided he needed to keep himself occupied while he was away and grabbed at an envelope from the hall table where he customarily threw the mail before reading it. He remembered a letter coming from MedLabs, and knew it contained a listing of upcoming clinical trials. Ryan had asked that Pen no longer participate and Pen had given in. Even though the infection at the injection sites was a completely random event, Pen figured he could give up the extra cash to make Ryan happy. Now there was no reason not to pick one and go. He took the pamphlet only and left the rest on the table.

At last the cab arrived out front and the driver honked. Finally,  Pen thought as he hurried out, unable to bear staying any longer. "Where ya headed, kid?"

"Take me to the Bank Street Hotel."

The ride to the hotel passed in silence as Pen fought against the memories of his earlier encounter with Ryan. He would not think of it now. Those thoughts would have to wait until he was alone and did not have to hide any possible reaction. Pen didn't think he would cry, after all he hadn't cried since he was a child, but he couldn't take that chance. He'd forgotten himself enough to allow laughter and that was bad enough.

They reached their destination and Pen paid the driver and walked slowly to the main entrance. His reflection was clear and he felt nothing but loathing at the sight. The short, pale blond hair now reached his shoulders, but the curls were still too noticeable. They made him look almost cute. Coupled with his small stature and delicate features, Pen saw that he looked like nothing more than a child and he abruptly turned away.

On the off chance, slim as it was, that Ryan might look for him, Pen decided that he would not stay here. He skirted the building and made his way towards another hotel a few blocks away. On the way, he stopped to purchase a few supplies he thought might come in handy. The registry showed the name Sam Pritchard, which was his middle name and his mother's maiden name. Both were on his documents, but anyone searching would overlook them.

If he was going to relive the earlier events with Ryan, and Pen knew he would if only to reinforce the truth that he only got what he deserved, Pen decided to be fortified. A tall glass of rum and coke would help him, and it could be replenished until the bottle emptied. It couldn't make things easier, but damn it, he wanted it. He kept the memories that threatened to burst at bay until the glass was empty and a new one poured, and then he closed his eyes to relive his folly...

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Pen set down the last scented candle and took in his preparations. Satin sheets would be nice, but he didn't have any. Tomorrow he would go buy some. Still, the bed looked lovely with the new pillows scattered around the surface. He'd rearranged the furniture and he thought it looked wonderful. The softest, fluffiest towels he owned were in the bathroom, ready to use after a shower. Hopefully a shower shared with the man he loved.

The ringing telephone jolted him out of his pleasant fantasy. He hurried to answer and smiled in delight when it proved to be Ryan. "Hi! This is a wonderful surprise; I wasn't expecting you to call until much later."

"I called to see if you'd like to meet me for lunch in about an hour? We could go to, uh, 'Popular Eats', because I know you love their fries."

"Lunch with you would be awesome," Pen said, so happy he could burst. 

If he'd been paying attention, Pen would have realized something was wrong the moment he arrived at the diner. Instead of the usual kiss, soft and lingering, he received a quick peck that landed on the corner of his mouth. Pen just blinked then mentally shrugged it off. There were a lot of people in the diner, and Ryan was technically on duty even if he was at lunch.

They talked of lots of things while they ate, all of them inconsequential. With each passing moment, Pen grew more and more nervous and uncomfortable. Something was off with Ryan's behaviour. It seemed distant, not at all like what Pen was used to when they were together. He tried to convince himself it was for the same reason as the kiss, but it became more and more difficult as time passed.

"Ryan, is there something wrong?" He leaned forward and lowered his voice. "You're acting a little strangely."

"No, there's nothing wrong, exactly. It's just, well, we've had a lot of fun these past few months, haven't we?"

It was there in the tone of Ryan's voice and in the way those golden eyes wouldn't meet Pen's eyes. Ice began to form in his chest. No. Please, no.

"I've wanted to help you see that you are a wonderful person who didn't deserve all the pain and abuse you've suffered through in the past."

 God no! Shut up, just shut up right now! Pen was proud that his voice was calm and even when he spoke. They were polite words, words that were expected. "I know you've wanted to help me."

"The thing is Carlie thinks we're spending too much time together. Once I thought about it, I realized that she's right, and that isn't fair to her. Not that we can't still get together," Ryan was quick to say. "I mean, we're still friends and friends hang out together."

 NO! This can't be happening to me! The ice thickened, even as Pen felt as though his heart was twisting and tearing in his chest. Carlie? If Ryan wanted a woman, there wasn't much Pen could do to change that. The small voice that had stopped soon after Ryan became a part of his life returned, mocking him.  Oh come now. You know it's your own fault. You made him wait too long and he's decided it's not worth the wait. You deserve this. This is what you deserve. At least he's not hitting you and trying to force you. You're so pathetic; you didn't really think he cared, did you? You didn't think he....LOVED you, did you?  Somehow, Pen found his voice, although it was strained and low.

"Of course we're friends. Don't worry about it. Just give me a call when you have time to get together and we'll make plans to, you know, hang out. I should probably let you get back to work and not take up any more of your time. I'll talk to you later. Well, whenever."

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Pen sighed, staring down into his third glass of rum and coke. He didn't want to drink anymore. Although it had seemed like a good idea, there was simply no point to it. Getting roaring drunk would not change the facts. Ryan still wouldn't be in his life, except as a friend who wanted to hang out, and Pen still wouldn't be worthy.

There were still things to do. He reached into his pocket and took out the paper from MedLabs. Looking over the clinical trials available, he found that there was a level three trial available. Level three trials didn't happen very often, since they could be dangerous. Those were the trials with a high possibility of negative reactions and side effects. They also paid the most amount of money.

He called the number and volunteered for the trial. It was scheduled to begin that night, so the preliminary interview was conducted over the phone. Only daywalkers were accepted, and he gave his class code, along with his mother's name and code. The medical databanks generally had him listed as simply a daywalker, since his nightwalker part didn't affect his system for illnesses and such. After almost twenty minutes of waiting and pacing, they accepted him into the trial and gave him an access number for the MedLab entrance. Night trials were uncommon, but not unheard of, although generally subjects spent the night. Tonight he was to go in at midnight, get three injections at twenty-minute intervals, and then he would be free to leave.

Pen needed to rest a bit before leaving for the trial in six hours, but there was one thing he absolutely had to take care first. He found the bag from the drug store and went into the bathroom. It was larger than he would have thought, considering the room itself was barely large enough for the double bed, dresser and chair. The counter alone was long enough for him to lie down on if he should want to for whatever reason.

Half an hour later, Pen looked at his reflection critically. A different person stared back at him. It was a person with deep auburn hair. The hair hung straight down to his shoulders, without even the hint of a curl or wave. Good enough. Maybe in a few days, there would be enough stubble for him to dye and make a bigger change. Later, before he left the room, he would come back and apply the little bit of make up to hide the dark circles already beginning beneath his green eyes.

Oddly enough, the lab assistant was waiting outside the MedLab entrance when Pen arrived and joined the half-dozen other participants. "My name is Sarah, and I'm Doctor Silversmith's assistant. Since this new vaccine is to be for the sole use of daywalkers, we need to rescan everyone before entering. There is enough risk for reactions and side effects as it is, we don't want additional problems because our screening was faulty."

"What kind of scan?" The large, biker-type guy asked the very question Pen wondered.

"Just a basic medi-scan. It will check to be certain of your daywalker status, just like if you go to the hospital emergency room. As I said, it is merely a precaution, since you've all been scanned before and your codes verified."

Pen hadn't been scanned before for this trial, but that didn't seem to be on the sheet the assistant had as she checked names. He breathed a sigh of relief when he passed through without trouble. For some reason, he really wanted to be included in this trial. His status as a half-breed could get him kicked out, which was the last thing he wanted.

They were escorted into one of the larger lab areas for the trial. Two dozen beds lined the walls, food and drink distributors stood at the side of the doors, and a sign showed shower rooms, one for men and one for women, at the back. The doctor waited for them, smiling and welcoming them in. When everyone was settled and quiet, he looked them all over.

"Thank you for volunteering. I want to point out one last time, for anyone who would like to leave, that this is an initial trial run of this vaccine. Although we've received approval for testing, it is classed as level three, because we just don't know what might happen in human subjects. Our animal subjects, altered to show full daywalker status, have all behaved as expected, which is very encouraging. Not one of the three tested species reacted other than how we believed they should. We will understand, however, if any of you have second thoughts and would like to withdraw from the study." He waited nearly a full minute before going on, smile larger than ever. "Excellent, and thank you again. If you'll form two lines, my assistant and I will begin with the first set of injections."

Nobody had a reaction after the first set of injections. The participants all talked together, exchanging superficial details of their lives. Pen remained quietly in the background, unwilling and unable to join in.

After the second set of injections, everybody started complaining of aches and chills. A few rushed to the bathrooms to throw up, but the majority just found a bed to drop into. Pen leaned on the wall near the door, arms crossed around his middle. He'd endured things so much more painful that he wasn't inclined to mind it too much.

After the third set of injections, the screams began. Everyone, Pen included, dropped to the ground in agony. The doctor checked them all over and wrote on his clipboard. Pen dragged himself back to his spot against the wall and panted through the pain. It felt like his entire body was on fire, so he dragged himself over to the drink dispenser. With a bottle of water in hand, he wedged himself between the two machines to prevent falling over and began to drink.

The doctor informed them that if nobody improved after another hour, they would be moved to the hospital section for treatment and excused himself. The man didn't see Pen when he stopped to speak with his assistant. "It's going perfectly. They should all be dead by morning. I don't think we need to witness the whole process right now, so let's go home and come back early to incinerate the bodies. We can then watch the recording and analyze the data. Our nightwalker patrons will pay us a lot of money if we can show them proof positive that they can dispose of their daywalker enemies so easily."

"I'll just seal the room and meet you back in your office around eight tomorrow morning. Which code should I use? Just the regular one?" Pen wasn't unduly worried about himself, he hadn't been afraid of death for a long time, but he didn't want the others to die. It scared him somewhat that the pretty lab assistant was just as bubbly as before.

"No, use 'E X T 4 9 7 2 4'. I've had it approved, but it isn't known yet and will be safer. See you tomorrow."

I have to see if I can help them, Pen told himself once the lab was sealed. With the code to open the door, all he needed to do was call for help if the phones were working. Slowly he walked forward, one careful step at a time. If he collapsed now, he wouldn't be able to help anyone.

He only took the time to examine the person nearest to him, a pretty young woman. Her skin was almost too hot to touch and her body looked somewhat caved in. She was panting, but her chest barely moved. Pen's eyes saw a few chests not moving at all as he started moving towards the phone on the desk.

"You've reached the emergency line of the Federal Daywalker Protection Agency. How may I help you?"

It took a moment before Pen was able to speak, and he hoped he would be able to give all the necessary information before it became too much for him. "I was involved in a clinical trial at MedLabs, Room 3. We're all dying. I overheard the doctor say that this was something prepared for nightwalkers to get rid of daywalkers. The code to unseal this room is E X T 4 9 7 2 4. Please hurry. The doctor's name is Silversmith and his assistant is Sarah."

"I will send a team out to your location immediately. Stay on the line with me until help gets there."

Pen cried out as the burning sensation increased. He dropped the phone with only one thought in his mind. The only thing that would help was if he reached the showers and covered himself with cold water. Vaguely he thought to tell the person on the other end of the line where he was going, but didn't think he had the strength. It seemed to take forever to reach the showers, and another to lift his arm up to the faucets. At last, he felt a little relief from the water, but it didn't touch the fire inside for very long.

In the end, all he could do was scream until his voice left him for good.

++++

Ryan returned to his office after his lunch with Pen and dropped his head in his hands. He ran through the conversation again and felt like he would throw up. The door to his office opened and he looked up to see Carlie come in, and though he wanted to yell at her to leave him alone, he kept his mouth closed.

"How did it go?" Her voice was low and tentative.

"Terrible. I almost couldn't go through with it. You should have seen the way the happiness just vanished from his eyes, but he didn't show any other reaction. I had to do it, didn't I?"

It all started with the phone call early that morning. Ryan woke up from a pleasant dream, where he and Pen were kissing and taking their clothes off. In this dream, it was certain that they would end up in bed, and Pen would ask Ryan to make love to him. Ryan wanted that so much in reality, but was determined to wait until Pen was ready.

He got out of bed and got his clothes ready for the day. Pen had invited him for dinner that evening, and he wanted his clothes to be appropriate for that. Unless, he mused, he brought a change of clothes along, even if it was just a shirt. For fifteen minutes, Ryan went over his options, finally deciding on taking along some jeans and his favourite black silk shirt.

Under the stream of hot water, Ryan washed up before reaching for his hard cock. He continued his dream, removing Pen's clothes until he was naked. They would kiss some more, rubbing their bodies together with increasing ardour. Naked, Pen went beyond beautiful. His body was toned, not muscular, the skin only faintly touched by a golden-tint. Carefully, Ryan would stand and take Pen's hand to lead him to the bedroom. It made him feel very strong and powerful to hold the small hand, to know that the delicate man trusted him.

Ryan groaned as he sped up his strokes, his other hand reaching down to cup his balls and stroke at the skin just behind. Warmth pooled at the base of his spine as the sensations increased with the images in his mind. It wasn't his hand stroking his rigid length to completion, but Pen's hand, making him look so big because of its small size. Ryan clearly imagined Pen looking up and saying, "Please, Ryan. Please fuck me."

Those words, even though they weren't real, pushed him over the brink. His orgasm had him trembling and leaning against the wall until his breathing was back under control. It didn't really matter to him that Pen wasn't ready for too much intimacy, but he dreamed about it, and hoped it would come sooner rather than later. His love wasn't dependent on sex alone. Love. He loved Penlan Taylor.




Walking in Daylight Ch. 05



His smile stayed with him as he finished his shower and dried off. The phone interrupted daydreams of a life built together with the younger man and he grumbled until he opened the line. "Sealey here."

An electronically altered voice immediately spoke up. "Agent Sealey? We don't appreciate people who associate with half-breeds. We advise you to end things. Immediately."

"Who the Hell do you think you are?" Ryan demanded, all his good humour disappearing at the hateful words. "I don't care how you feel about things, but I won't let you try and interfere in my life."

"We have your brother, Agent Sealey. Unless you end things with the half-breed, things could become, shall we say, uncomfortable for Benjie here." Tortured screams sounded, like nothing Ryan ever heard before. "I have a nice, sharp knife and I'm very skilled and efficient with it. Invite your half-breed to lunch and end things. I have you under surveillance and will see and hear everything. Do not try to contact anyone, including your father, or I will know and might just have to bring him into these negotiations. You wouldn't like that, I promise you.

"Once your relationship is severed, your brother will no longer be in any danger. I will release him tomorrow and will call you with a location where you can pick him up. If you don't listen and keep on seeing the freak, I will call you tomorrow with a location where you can pick up the body. Have a nice day, Agent Sealey."

Right away, Ryan hurried into the office and called a meeting with the NCB. A search of Benjie's apartment showed it to be wrecked, the door barely holding once it was opened. There was too little information for them to find out anything. There was no help for it. Ryan had to go and 'break up' with Pen. It twisted at his guts, but everyone promised that they would do all they could to catch whoever was responsible.

Carlie startled him out of his reverie when she took his hand in hers. "We'll catch this guy and then I'll go with you to try and explain. Come on, the NCB agents have come up with some names they want to run by you. They've also decided it might be a good idea for someone to go talk to your father anyway."

He had a hard time concentrating as he looked at name after name of people who were known to be vocal, not only against half-breeds, but against nightwalkers and daywalkers as well. It was a waste of time, since he hadn't seen anyone and the voice was altered. Except there was one name that he recognized. Benjie Sealey. Surprised, he looked at the information, expecting it to contain only the details of his part in Pen's attack in high school. It contained a lot more than just that incident. There were three pages of accusations, ranging from harassment to kidnapping and torture. They were accusations only, because there was no proof and none of the victims identified him or pressed charges.

Sickened, Ryan gave his brother's profile to the agents in charge of the investigation. They didn't seem surprised, and Ryan saw them exchange a long look. "What is it? There's something you're not telling me."

"One of our agents went to your father station to talk to him. Your brother has been staying out there since early yesterday. We confiscated his cell and found that he made a phone call to your home this morning, at 7:20am."

The implications crashed down on Ryan and he went blank. His own brother. He didn't know how long he sat there, stunned, but finally Carlie got his attention enough to ask if he wanted to go see Pen.

Pen. Yes, he had to go see Pen and beg for his forgiveness. Agent Carlisle said they had about two hours before Ryan's father and brother arrived for questioning, but they would wait if necessary. Ryan kept seeing the light of joy fading from those beautiful green eyes, the light that had only recently taken residence there. He knew he couldn't expect the forgiveness he so desperately wanted, but he had to try. Pen had to know that it wasn't his fault; that he deserved to be happy with someone who would love him and be proud to be with him.

Carlie drove the car, since Ryan was too nervous and upset. The trip seemed to take twice as long as usual and he was both anxious and reluctant to arrive at their destination. Finally, they arrived and he was out of the car almost before it came to a complete halt. Twice, as he made his way up the walk, he stopped and turned around to leave. The third time he stopped, it was to stare at the box sitting just outside the door, his name written in large letters on the side. Slowly he went forward again and climbed the two steps. On the top of the box were the words 'Leave your key'.

Those words cut through the fog Ryan waded through since learning his brother was involved in ruining both his and Pen's life. He pounded on the door, calling for Pen to come open the door and talk to him. After five minutes, he took out his key and unlocked the door. Nothing looked disturbed at first glance. He wandered through the rooms, looking carefully in case Benjie had come and done something to Pen after they parted at lunch.

In the bedroom, Ryan saw the rearranged furniture and the candles in the garbage. Along with the candles were a home test kit and some lube. Pain squeezed at his heart. He knew what that meant, just how much Pen cared about him if he was willing to take that step.

"Ryan? I checked the last number called from the phone, and it was a cab company. The driver remembered Pen and said he drove him to the Bank Street Hotel." Carlie hated to see her partner like this and hoped it would all work out for him and Pen. "The hotel doesn't have anyone registered under Penlan Taylor, but I thought we could go out there and see for ourselves. I won't let you give up so easily."

Although the clerk at the Bank Street Hotel remembered a man of Pen's description approaching the hotel, he never actually came in, but turned away at the doors. The two agents spent some time canvassing the nearby stores and came up empty. Pen, suitcase in hand, had effectively disappeared. 

The rest of the afternoon and into the evening Ryan listened through one-way glass as Benjie gloated about how he'd pulled one over on his brother. Then he began to realize just how much trouble he was in and tried to pass the blame over onto some of his friends. Unfortunately for him, his earlier words were recorded and he was in big trouble, along with the friends he implicated. Benjie then tried to say how his brother was an agent for the FDPA and his father a chief of police and he wouldn't be in trouble. That defence was blown out of the water when Ryan and their father came in the room and told him he was on his own.

Ryan got home and collapsed on his bed dejected. Everywhere he looked, there were reminders of Pen and his visits. The reminders were either things the man had left behind, or just memories of kisses and laughter and togetherness. "Please Pen, don't let this push you back into the darkness." He remembered how Pen once told him that it felt like he was walking in daylight for the first time in his life when he was with Ryan.

The phone rang and woke him in the middle of the night. He growled into the receiver when he saw it was one-thirty in the morning. "This had better be damned good."

"All hands on deck, Ry," Carlie's voice was tight with urgency. "We got a call from someone at MedLabs, something about a bunch of daywalkers dying because of something to do with a nightwalker plot. Whoever called wasn't making much sense. Meet up at the Lab, Room 3 and someone will get there with the code."

"Send me the recording of the call, and I'll see if I can decipher some more on the way."

Ryan used his Mustang, since he was leaving from home, and he programmed the auto-drive so he could concentrate on getting all the information he could from the recording. He was halfway to his destination when the file arrived and he closed his eyes, ready to write in his notebook, for any pertinent information.

"You've reached the emergency line of the Federal Daywalker Protection Agency. How may I help you?"

"I was ... trial at MedLabs, Room 3. We're all dying. I ... doctor say ... this was ... for nightwalkers ... rid of daywalkers. The code ... room is E X T 4 9 7 2 4. Please hurry. The doc... Silversmith and his assistant is Sarah."

"I will send a team out to your location immediately. Stay on the line with me until help gets there."

"I CAN'T! I'M BURNING; WE'RE ALL BURNING! I NEED SOME WATER! AARRRGG!! 

There was more to the recording, but Ryan didn't bother listening. Each miss in the recording contained groans and whimpers that garbled whatever words Pen tried to speak. The screaming at the end tore at his heart because he knew that voice. It was Penlan who spoke with agonizing pain and screamed at the end. It was Penlan, who, because Ryan rejected him, found himself taking part in a clinical trial at MedLabs. It was Penlan who was dying on the phone, who might already dead by the time Ryan got there.

Several ambulances and agency vehicles were already on the premises by the time Ryan arrived. He ran inside, not pausing as he flashed his credentials at the men standing guard and yelled for someone to find and detain Doctor Silversmith. Inside, everyone surrounded the access panel, trying to input the code to unseal the doors. Ryan was just about ready to push them aside and do it himself when the doors finally opened.

The stench of burnt flesh hit them like a wall, almost pushing them back as they gagged. When they got into the room itself, they found six bodies in various contorted poses on the floor. None of them looked burned, which didn't correspond with either the phone call or the smell. As they approached, they saw how the bodies were caved in around the bones. One of the ambulance medics knelt down next to one of the bodies for a quick examination.

"I think they burned on the inside. It's the only thing that would make sense, but we won't know for sure until they're processed. We'll look for survivors, although that doesn't seem too likely."

"Ry! God, what happened in here?"

Ryan turned to his partner and managed to get his voice functioning, albeit at a croak. "Pen is the one who called us in. It was his voice on the recording, Carlie. I don't see him anywhere here, though, so we have to find him. No matter what hap...happened to him, we have to find him."

"Hey!" Ryan and Carlie turned to the agent who called out. "That door back there is opening. The one to the men's showers. We've got a live one! Come on guys, get a gurney in here!"

Remembering Pen saying he needed water, his hopes soared as he moved in that direction. His feet halted at the sight of someone with dark red hair pulling themselves along the floor through the door. Ryan's heart dropped when he realized it was the wrong colour hair. Two ambulance medics blocked his view and he looked again at the bodies still lying on the floor. None of them was Pen.

Carlie grabbed Ryan's arm and directed his attention to the one by the shower door. He'd been turned over to be transferred to the gurney and his facial features were clear. "Pen! Pen, sweetheart, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean any of it."

"Stand back," one of the medics came to block him. "He's a nightwalker, Sir, we can't take any chances."

"No, no he's a half-breed, half daywalker and half nightwalker. Pen has the fangs, but not the instincts. Let me through."

Carlie joined Ryan to walk beside Pen on the way to the ambulance. Pen was panting and thrashing against the restraints, but even as they watched, the fangs retreated, as did the short claws on his thumbs. For a moment, his eyes opened, and they were no longer green but black. They flickered over those people near him, their gaze empty of everything but pain. They finally fixed on Carlie and he managed to indicate he wanted to speak with her. She leaned close, even though the medics advised against it.

"Love him, Carlie. He is so good, too good for me, but he deserves love. Give it to him."

"No, Pen. I do love him, but only as a friend. He's madly in love with you. Let him explain what happened and then let him love you. It's all he wants, you know."

Ryan couldn't hear what they said, only that Pen held onto Carlie's jacket so tightly. He started whimpering again about the burning, his voice quickly rising into an agonized wail of disjointed words. Some ice packs from the back of the ambulance seemed to help and Ryan was left with his partner as Pen left for the hospital for treatment.

++++

Pen fought against the darkness. The darkness had seemed so familiar for a while, but now it was different. It was now filled with pain, fire, and a voice that tried to see him through to some light. The voice told him that Ryan loved him. The voice told him to listen to Ryan and know that he was loved. Pen was afraid of that voice, because it gave him hope.

Hope now could break him. Every time he felt hope in the past, it was always an illusion that cast him back into the pits when he realized it was false. And yet, he was listening to that voice simply because it gave him hope. There had never been a voice to give him hope before, unless it was his own voice. The mocking voice he usually heard generally tried to put him down and make him doubt himself.

When the fire threatened to overwhelm and consume him, the voice became louder. It told him that Ryan was madly in love with him. Pen couldn't help but listen and cling to the voice that helped him ride the wave of pain brought by the rise of the fire. The voice wrapped around him to soothe the burning when the fire retreated once again.

"Pen? Can you hear me, Pen?"

Oh, that was Ryan! Pen heard the beloved voice and all the pain he felt, both because of the fire and because of the words Ryan spoke at lunch vanished. It didn't seem possible that he would just forget how Ryan only considered him a friend, but he did, because the voice told him that Ryan was madly in love with him. Not just 'in love', but 'madly in love', and Pen knew, somehow, that voice wouldn't lie to him.

"I'm so sorry for what I did, Sweetheart. I'll never be able to apologize enough for hurting you like that. I thought I didn't have a choice, and it turns out it was all a lie."

The sadness in Ryan's voice bothered Pen. He didn't want Ryan to be hurting like that. Pen wanted to wrap the man in his arms and soothe him, but he couldn't yet find his way out of this blasted darkness. It wasn't right that Ryan should apologize to him. That wasn't the way things should be. When things went wrong, it was Pen's fault; it was because of something Pen had done.

A small flash of light nearly blinded him in the darkness, even though he knew the darkness was inside him and his eyes weren't even open. But I didn't do anything wrong, this time. It was the strangest thing, especially since it came from himself rather than from someone else. Not that it was Ryan's fault either, he'd said he'd been lied to, but Pen knew he didn't deserve the way Ryan spoke to him at lunch.

Something inside Pen loosened as he realized that truth. Other words Ryan spoke to him in the past came to mind. How he would never intentionally hurt Pen, and how much he cared about Pen. The one constant he could count on since Ryan returned into his life was that the older man always tried to comfort and boost Pen. If Pen did something wrong, though, Ryan didn't hesitate to point it out, so he wasn't just talking generalities.

Ryan stayed with him a lot while he was lost in the fiery darkness. Pen heard about what Benjie did, which was the reason Ryan told him they could only be friends. He heard how scared and guilty Ryan felt when he discovered that Pen was at MedLabs and in danger. Pen also heard those things that Ryan didn't say. Ryan didn't ask for forgiveness. He didn't say that he would apologize again when Pen was awake. He didn't talk about any future for them.

The omissions frightened Pen, more than anything had ever frightened him in his life. It sounded, in a way, as if Ryan was saying goodbye.

In spite of the pain, of his fear of the fire, Pen blasted through it all in the hopes to make himself heard. "S-s-stay with m-me, Ry-Ry-Ryan! Love you."

Some time later, Pen didn't know how long, he became aware of his surroundings again. He identified the sounds he heard with confidence: a door, quiet footsteps, and the rattle of metal rings on a curtain rod. Instinctively he knew that he was in a hospital bed, and then he remembered why. He also remembered that Ryan stayed with him. He remembered everything and wanted to smile. The voice he heard wasn't familiar, but he wasn't worried. Instead, he opened his eyes.

He drank in the sight of the beautiful man speaking to the doctor. The dark blond hair looks mussed up as though he's run his hand through it repeatedly or just got out of bed. Ryan's dressed in a tight tee, tight in all the right places and looks sexy because he usually wears a shirt and tie, and jeans that hug his hips and ass. Pen just stares and lets himself feel the love he has for Ryan. He'll beg if he has to, just to make sure that Ryan never, ever leaves him.

"Ryan, I hear we had a quiet night?"

"A good night for sure. There were no temperature spikes, no convulsions, and he took the water well on his own." Both men smiled at each other.

"The last scan confirms my theory," the doctor said, handing over a piece of paper. "He scans as normal human now, not even a hint of either daywalker or nightwalker in him at all. Nobody can really explain it, but there are talks of grants to scientists to see if the compound can be used to turn nightwalkers to full human again. Not too sure how I feel about that, but it's out of my hands."

Ryan gave a short laugh at the news. "That would certainly be ironic; the nightwalkers pay for something to kill daywalkers, and it turns out it will turn them human again."

"Not to interrupt," Pen said, "but I'm pretty damned thirsty over here, and my nose is itching like crazy."

"Sweetheart! Oh, it's nice to see your beautiful eyes again. How are you feeling? Here, have some water. I know you probably want me to leave, but you have to let me explain and apologize, even if you can't forgive me. You just..." Ryan kept on babbling and Pen thought it was about the sweetest thing ever.

"Shut up, Ryan. I love you. I could hear you, you know, and I heard everything you had to say about Benjie and all. Even before I heard all the explanation, though, I still wanted you here. I heard your voice and it helped me stand up to the fire."

The doctor moved closer and gave Pen a quick scan. "You can both talk in just a bit, there are some things we need to take care of first."

"All right, but before all that, there's one thing I really need."

"What's that, Sweetheart? Anything you need, anything at all."

Pen looked at both men for a long moment before answering. "I wasn't kidding before, you know. If one of you doesn't scratch my nose soon, I'm going to fucking scream."

+++ 

Pen stepped out of the shower and after a quick wipe down, looked at his reflection in the mirror. Ugh. At some point in the hospital, they'd removed the dye from his hair. Something about a possible reaction to the treatment or some other such nonsense. He knew Ryan liked his white-blond hair, but the change had been nice for him. Back to being cute with pale curls around his face, he supposed. At least until Ryan went back to work and he could dye it again in peace.

In the week since he'd been released from the hospital, Ryan stayed with him to be sure nothing happened. Nothing had happened, either. Ryan slept in the guest room at night, even with the hints Pen sent his way. Unfortunately, Pen was quite brave enough yet to send less-than-subtle hints.




Walking in Daylight Ch. 05



His room wasn't all that far, so he simply held the towel around his waist and stepped out of the bathroom...and straight into Ryan. He reached out with his hands to steady himself, losing his towel in the process. There he stood, naked in front of the fully-dressed man, with nothing to hide his rising erection. It was so embarrassing.

"My God, Sweetheart, you're so beautiful." Ryan's hand came up and caressed his cheek, then moved down his body to rest on his hip. "Still a bit thin, but very beautiful."

"Thin, yes. The fire burned a lot of me away. Does it bother you?" Pen didn't know that there was fear in his wide green eyes.

"Not in the way you think. It bothers me that you went through that, is all. I wish I hadn't..."

"Don't. You did what you thought you had to do. I'm glad in a way. If I hadn't been there, think of the chaos when daywalkers died all over the place. I stopped that, and so did you."

"You are such a good man, Pen. Considering the way you've been treated all your life, you still think that way. Everyone should know how kind and considerate you are."

Pen decided in that moment that he could indeed be bold. His hands reached up and took hold of Ryan's face, pulling it down for a kiss. Their mouths met forcefully, lips open to taste immediately. Ryan took control almost immediately, but Pen didn't mind, wanting the other man to guide him and show him what to do. His experiences with his past boyfriends didn't lend themselves to the kind of encounter he wanted here and now.

He hooked one leg around Ryan's and brought his hands up beneath the sweater to touch skin. Oh goodness, Ryan was so warm and hard beneath his fingers. Pen moaned as he stroked and petted the skin, wanting more but lost in the kiss.

The doorbell made him jump and he frowned, wondering whom it could be. "I ordered something for us to eat. Grab a robe while I answer the door, then I'll take care of you before we eat. I promise, Pen."

What was that supposed to mean? Pen wondered. The possibilities excited him even as he grabbed his bathrobe from behind his bedroom door. He was almost out the door again when he paused and hurried to his nightstand. When he got back from the hospital, he'd rescued the items from the garbage bin. Removing the bottle of lube, he slipped it into the pocket of his robe with a grin. They might not need it, but it paid to be prepared.

The air began to smell of Chinese food as he approached the kitchen and he hoped there would be fortune cookies. Somehow, he thought his fortune would be positive this time. Two hands gripped him around the waist as soon as he entered the kitchen, pulling him tight to a hard body. Ryan almost growled as he pushed his tongue inside Pen's mouth, sliding around as though he intended to claim it as his. Which it was, really, Pen supposed.

Before he could blink, Pen found himself lifted and sat on the counter. It was a little precarious, since the upper cabinets were only a few inches back from the edge of the counter. The belt on his robe was undone and the edges pushed back, leaving his front naked to Ryan's eyes. It felt utterly decadent.

"I've wanted to do this for such a long time," Ryan murmured as he lowered his head and nibbled along the exposed collarbone. "Such a long time." Pen arched up into the touch and nearly slid off the counter. Ryan told him he would simply have to stay still, which was really asking a lot of him.

Lips and teeth marked a path down to his nipples, where they stopped to play and tease. Ryan flicked his tongue over each one in turn, pleased to hear the whimpers and moans from his small partner. Pen pressed one hand to the back of his tormentor's head. He would have used both, but his other was keeping him steady on the countertop. Most likely Ryan would keep him from slipping or falling, but that didn't mean he would take a chance.

Ryan dragged his tongue away from the rigid nubs, leaving a wet stripe to the tiny navel. He groaned in his throat, loving the taste of soap and man. He sealed his lips on the skin of the lower belly and sucked hard and fast.

"Ryan! Oh please, it hurts. Don't stop, don't stop!"

Ryan chuckled, releasing the tender bruised flesh with one final lick. Pen felt his legs being spread and scrambled to hold on to his balance. His complaint was breathless and completely ignored. He knew what was going to happen, what Ryan was going to do, but only one other person ever did it to him and that was Matt. That was so long ago that he hardly remembered what it was like.

The first touch on his hard prick, licking around the head, made him cry out. He tried to look, to see what Ryan was doing to him, but the sensations were too big to do anything but lean his head back on the cabinet doors. He could imagine it though, having done so on his own a thousand times.

One of Ryan's hands wrapped around the base of his shaft, with the thumb stroking his sack between his balls. Ryan twisted his tongue around, drinking up the pre-come he was leaking. Then the most amazing thing, his cock was buried in Ryan's hot mouth, the head in the other man's throat.

"Please! Oh shit, I want...I...I need..." What he needed was to move, but he couldn't do anything but sit there. He managed to tighten his legs against Ryan, which didn't help in the slightest. It felt like he was suspended by a wire, it was painful and so wonderful at the same time. He could barely stand it.

Ryan's mouth and tongue moved up and down his shaft with only enough pressure and suction to keep him hovering. One hand came to rest on his hip, while the other played with Pen's balls, rolling them and then squeezing lightly.

"Are you ready, Beautiful? Do you want to come for me? God, you're the hottest thing I've ever seen right now."

"Yes! Ryan! Oh, oh, AAHH!"

Pen couldn't see, hear or think. All he knew was that Ryan's mouth was on his cock as he came harder than ever before in his life. Ryan kept on sucking through his orgasm, getting every drop and coaxing him on to greater heights. Just before it would start to get painful, Ryan let him slip out.

Pen jumped off the counter, hanging on to Ryan when his legs threatened to buckle. Once he was steady, they kissed, soft and gentle. "Let's eat and then we'll see what we can come up with to keep us busy."

They ate their food as fast as they could without making themselves sick, and then adjourned to the living room. Ryan chose a movie they both had seen before, just in case they got distracted, which was a very good possibility. The looks Pen sent him while they ate, hungry and sexy at the same time, told him that the young man wasn't going to hold anything back. Ryan still wasn't going to get his hopes up too high, just in case.

Pen settled on Ryan's lap in the large chair, head tucked between shoulder and chin. His mind was whirling as he all but ignored the movie, hand petting the muscular chest he lay upon. Things had gone well when he took the initiative earlier and kissed Ryan. It had led to an amazing blowjob. Could he do that again? Where would the kiss lead this time? He could probably make sure he led to something even more amazing, if he brought out the bottle of lube at the right time.

Fucking Ryan would be a dream come true. No, making love to Ryan would be a dream come true, because it could never be something so crass as fucking between him and Ryan. On his part, anyway. He only hoped it would be as special to the other man as it was to him.

Lifting his head, he looked into Ryan's gorgeous golden eyes, to see if he could find his answers. God, it was there, it was all there. Love and passion clear as day in the eyes of the man he loved. There were traces of other emotions, uncertainty one of them, but the clearest one was love. Slowly he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Ryan's. Again and again he brushed a kiss, his heart swelling in his chest.

"I love you so much, Ryan. I fell in love with you so long ago and ignored it, because I felt I didn't deserve you. I know now that I don't deserve anything but..."

Ryan kissed him to make his stop talking. When he lifted his head, he was frowning. "I don't want to hear any more talk about you not deserving things. You deserve everything wonderful, Pen. I love you too, you know, and think you're simply amazing."

"What I was going to say before I was interrupted was that now I know that I don't deserve anything but the best. And you, dear man, are the best there is for me." Pen shifted to lie along Ryan, chest to chest. "I have something in my pocket that I want you to make use of, Ryan. Shall I get it, or will you?"

When the bottle was in Ryan's hand, Pen received a blank stare. He began to worry, but his anxiety ended when Ryan possessed his mouth with a fierceness that he'd never known before. "Are you sure you're ready for this, Sweetheart? I don't want you to feel that you have to for my sake."

"I'm ready. If I were going to do it because I felt I had to, it would have been with one of those assholes I called boyfriend. I love you and I want to feel you inside me, filling me."

Ryan groaned and started kissing Pen again. These kisses were light and coaxing, and then deep and demanding by turns, switching back and forth without any predictability. Pen hardly noticed when his leg was lifted, but he definitely noticed the hand that stroked over his ass, fingers dipping to gently touch his hole. His other leg, still extended flexed as he tried to lift up or push back, although he was unsure exactly which he wanted to do.

Wrapping his arms around Ryan's head, he decided to just stop trying to think his way through and feel. Ryan took such good care of him earlier in the kitchen that he knew this would be wonderful too.

When the finger went from touching to penetrating, Pen lifted his head to gasp, then dove back into the kiss. He teased the other tongue into his mouth and sucked on it, holding it still with a slight press of teeth. A second finger joined the first and Pen keened, loving the feeling as his fingers grabbed a tight hold of Ryan's hair. He started to rock against Ryan, panting in desire.

"Let's go finish this in the bedroom, Sweetheart," Ryan whispered, his voice thick and needy. He groaned when Pen wrapped his legs around his hips when he stood. "You feel so good, so hot and tight on my fingers. When I get you to bed, I'll put three fingers inside you until you're begging for me to fill you with my cock."

Pen whimpered and licked at Ryan's ear. "God, yes, please. I want to be on top of you, Ryan. The only time I did this, when the pictures were taken, I pretended I was with you. This time it will be you and I want...oh, Ryan, please let me ride you!"

Ryan shuddered and closed his eyes against the rush of emotion at hearing how Pen had fantasized about him during his first time. Damn he loved Pen so much! He lay back on the bed, leaning on the padded headboard and pillows without letting go of his precious love. Pen straddled him, staring down at him with love and trust just shining from his amazing green eyes.

After working three fingers in the tiny passage for a few moments, Pen riding them, Ryan helped position the younger man in place. Pen bit his lower lip as he took the hard shaft into his body. Once the head was in, he paused, holding himself in place until he couldn't stand it anymore. Slowly he lowered himself, bit by bit, circling his hips as he descended. At last he was sitting flush with Ryan's body, so full and stretched that he wanted to cry with the joy of it.

He started to move as Ryan reached up to play with his nipples, thrusting without lifting himself. It felt fantastic, to Ryan as well judging by the groan. He needed more, however, and he began a slow rise and fall, adjusting to the girth that filled him. Soon he was bouncing hard and fast, slamming down at Ryan who now thrust upwards to meet him. Ryan bent his legs and Pen leaned back and wrapped his arms around Ryan's knees. The position was somewhat awkward, but allowed him to pull up a little more easily, helped by those strong hands that gripped his hips.

The new position also resulted in Ryan's cock stroking against Pen's prostate. Pen babbled and cried out, begging Ryan for something, anything, to push him over the edge into bliss.

Ryan grunted with every thrust, watching Pen's face. He was so beautiful! One of his hands left Pen's hip to stroke the lovely cock that was dripping on his stomach. It didn't take much, just a couple of strokes, and Pen threw his head back with a scream as he came. The seed pulsed out repeatedly and that deliciously tight ass clenched even tighter. Ryan could barely move, but he buried himself deep one last time and joined his lover in orgasm.

"Fuck, yes! Oh, fuck, that's so good Ryan! I love you so much!"

"You're gorgeous, Sweetheart! I'm right with you, coming with you, inside you. Feel me, just feel how hard you make me come!"

Pen finally collapsed against Ryan, cheek pressed a solid shoulder. Ryan sifted his fingers through the silky-soft curls that were damp from their exertions. Both men continued whispering their love for each other, waiting for their hearts and breaths to return to normal.

Ryan pulled Pen up to claim his lips, emphasizing his loving declarations. He rubbed their noses together and asked, "Will you be walking in the daylight again, Pen?"

"No, not walking in daylight," he answered, smiling at Ryan's surprise. "I'm going to be living in daylight every day from now on. With you."

END.