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The Halls of Academe Ch. 01

By: Ken Nitsua



by K. Nitsua. Newly revised version copyright 2014 by the author.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the fifth and, so far, final "Steelman Tale." Readers will once again recognize characters from past stories in this series, though, like "Class Reunion," this is not a sequel. DISCLAIMER: Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is purely coincidental. 

*

From the moment I saw him at the airport that March, I knew that James Druther Ohlen-"Drew" to everyone who knew him--would be trouble. He was the last of the finalists for an open faculty position in History, my department at Steelman, the small college where I still teach. As a member of the search committee I had volunteered to pick him up and take him to campus for the grueling two-day interview.

It's hard to believe now, but I walked right past him in the crowd. A voice called, "Professor Reynolds?"

I turned, and found myself looking into deep blue eyes in a smiling face. As I shook his hand, I sized up the rest of him--blond hair, firm, dimpled jaw, and even white teeth. I let my eyes flicker over the rest of a compact, trim body. I knew from reading his C.V. that he was thirty-two, fresh out of a major California university, a top graduate of their Ph.D. program in history.

"Call me Glenn," I said. "How did you know it was me?"

"Well," he replied, "Let's just say you had a look about you. The look of a man who needs to find someone very badly."

His cobalt eyes twinkled. Flirting with someone who was evaluating him for a possible job was outrageous-but he could get away with it. I started walking to counter the weakness in my knees. "Baggage claim's this way. Did you check anything?"

"Just one piece--but it's a big one." His smile flashed again.

Drew turned out to be a stellar candidate, delivering a brilliant demonstration lecture, and answering endless questions patiently and with good humor. He charmed students, faculty and administrators alike. Halfway through his visit an unspoken consensus had formed: he was our man, assuming we could get him.

We were alone together only a few times, but one was memorable. It was in a men's room in the main classroom building just before Drew was to give his lecture. I had finished my business and was standing at one of the basins when he entered, dressed in a dark suit. His walk was jaunty and he looked pretty relaxed for someone whose future was supposedly on the line.

Drew doffed his jacket, hung it on the hook near the door and headed for one of the urinals, choosing the one furthest from me. As he unzipped I stared into the mirror. Though I was washing my hands carefully my eyes were focused elsewhere. A moment later my furtive efforts were rewarded. My heart gave a leap as I saw the size of the soft cock held casually in his hand. Golden liquid issued from the healthy pink, circumcised head, flaring out just the way I liked it from the shaft.

All too soon he finished and flushed. I made a show of pulling paper towels from the rack and drying myself. As he came up to the mirror I said, "Good luck."

Drew smiled. "Thanks." He put on his jacket, then said, "I feel fine about this part. I think I've already had the real interview."

He left before I had a chance to think of an answer.

The next day I drove him to the airport. We chatted and laughed in the car as though we had known each other all our lives.

Drew's adroit gaydar had extracted from me the fact that I was unattached. "What's a nice guy like you doing all alone?" he asked, as we swung onto the access road.

I wasn't about to get into it. "Long and boring story. What about you? No one who'll be heartbroken if you leave L.A. for the Lone Star State?"

Drew shook his head. "I fall in love every two weeks, but you know what they say about the good ones all being taken."

I parked the car and walked with him into the terminal. At the security checkpoint I stopped and gave him his bag. I held out my hand. "Have a safe trip, Dr. Ohlen."

Drew pursed his lips in mock reproach. "So formal." The next moment I gasped as I felt a hand on my crotch, squeezing gently. I looked around, wondering if anyone had seen, but people continued to mill past us unconcerned. Drew released me and shook my hand, still extended in my state of shock.

"Thank you, Dr. Reynolds." He added in a low voice, "I saw you cop a look yesterday. Now we're even."

As he walked toward the line of passengers waiting to have their baggage inspected, he said over his shoulder, "See you in the fall, I hope."

My mouth was still open. I closed it and walked away. As soon as I could I quickly adjusted what was pressing painfully against the front of my pants.

Drew Ohlen joined the Steelman faculty the following September and quickly settled into life at a small college. I had been appointed as department chair starting that fall, so I saw quite a bit of him. He treated me courteously and never referred to the singular way he had said farewell the previous spring.

I might have known Drew would be a fitness buff. He certainly was easy on the eye jogging or cycling around campus. It was hard not to notice the wide shoulders, the flat stomach, the way his exercise shorts fitted his thighs and butt, and especially how the elastic material outlined the equipment between his legs.

I swam laps for exercise myself, and ran into him at the pool as well. Most of the males on campus wore baggy boxer-style trunks, especially those of us past a certain age. Drew, though, kept with Speedos. I found it hard not to stare at him when he appeared on deck, lean and muscled and nearly naked. He was a much faster swimmer that I was and was always out and dressed before I was through. This was a good thing as I don't know what I would have done if we'd ended up in the shower together. It was bad enough that we sometimes got to the pool at the same time and I had to stand next to him in the locker room, trying to carry on a conversation, while he peeled down to nothing.

I was not going to get involved with a colleague, especially one I was supervising. I'd had a workplace affair at my first job and it had blown up in my face. I'd been forced to resign and spent several years out of teaching, which nearly killed me. To get hired here at Steelman I'd had to give up all credit toward tenure.

It had been a long, hard climb back up, but I had done it. Most people around here figured I was gay, but no one knew anything about my past. I had the reputation of being a discreet "confirmed bachelor." I was determined to keep it that way.

Drew had other ideas. He often stopped by my office, ostensibly to talk about work. One of my duties as chair, after all, was to mentor new faculty, and make sure they were on the right track toward tenure. I had my doubts Drew would stay the course at Steelman, not because he wasn't cutting it. James Druther Ohlen was a brilliant scholar, the best we'd ever managed to land in the department. He had already published articles in top-tier journals and was working on his first book. Sooner or later a more prestigious institution was going to grab him. It was just a matter of time.

Drew always claimed afterward that he hadn't hung around the department all those evenings just to hit on me. "Give me a break, Glenn," he said with that smile that always made my knees turn to rubber. "You had me scared to death with all that talk about perfecting your teaching, keeping up with your research, and pulling your weight in the department. I was working like a dog."

So was I. The administrative duties of a chair in a small college department are heavy, and you don't get any release time. Besides, I didn't have anybody at home waiting for me.

One evening that fall, getting on toward mid-semester, I'd stayed in the office to work on some budget details. About six o'clock I leaned back in my chair, yawned and rubbed my aching eyes. Two empty cans of Diet Coke sat by the computer. I had to take a leak, and bad.

I hurried out of the office and down to the men's room in the hallway, my bladder screaming for relief. I barely got unzipped in front of the urinal before the floodgates opened.

As the pressure began to ease I closed my eyes and sighed. Then the door creaked open behind me. My bashful kidneys clamped shut. With an effort I got myself going again, staring straight ahead, determined not to acknowledge the intruder.

"Hello there." The voice came from right next to me. I turned my head and saw Drew. I was able to hold his gaze only because to look elsewhere would have meant looking down, and I wasn't going to get caught doing that again.

"Hello," I managed to say.

"Working late, I see," Drew said, unzipping and letting loose. How could he be so casual? I couldn't do anything except nod. Carrying on conversations at the pisser wasn't my usual style. Thank goodness I was just about done with my business.

"You work too hard, Dr. Reynolds."

I shrugged, and reached down to zip up. To my horror I realized that my anatomy had a mind of its own, and had reacted to the fact that I was standing with my dick out next to an attractive man, also exposed.

I gritted my teeth as I worked to stuff myself back into my trousers. Drew stood there all the while, saying nothing, a small smile on his face. My own face was burning.

Finally I got myself put together and lurched toward the sink. As I ran water in a noisy stream Drew flushed and joined me.

I washed my hands carefully, saying nothing. I could hardly help catching his eye in the mirror. Drew grinned.

"Looks like you could use some serious stress relief."

"What--" I started to say, then realized he had shifted his gaze to my crotch, still bulging.

My younger colleague shook his head in mock reproach. "Got to keep those pipes cleared, Glenn. You're getting to the age where it's going to catch up with you." Exactly as he had done the year before, he wiped his hands and left before I could think of a rejoinder.

Alone in bed late that night, I thought about Drew--his toned body, glinting blue eyes, and mellow voice. His smile. I pictured the times I'd seen him riding his bike, or at the pool. As my hand began to move on my cock I imagined myself in front of him, hooking my fingers under the waistband of his tight Speedos, seeing his rapidly hardening dick flop out as I fell to my knees and my mouth opened.

Afterward I blotted off the hot spurts just beginning to cool on my stomach with my jockeys and drifted into sleep, naked under the covers.

Still, I managed to control myself at work, giving Drew nothing. He must have taken that as a challenge.

It was after lunch one day in late October. We'd been having a string of sunny, ninety-degree scorchers, unseasonably warm even for central Texas, the kind of weather that gets people talking about global warming.

I was working at my desk, the door open. I heard a knock.

"Listen," Drew's voice said. "What's this I hear about a nude beach around here?"

I looked up, startled. He was lounging in the doorway. I quickly motioned him in. It wasn't till I shut the door that I answered.

"Look," I said, "I'm going to have to ask you to be a bit more discreet."

Drew looked contrite. "You're right, Glenn, sorry." Then he smiled. "But anyway, can you take me there?"

I sighed. "Why? You don't need me. I'll just give you directions. People will be falling over themselves to share your beach towel."

He took the implied compliment with practiced ease. "I'd rather have you. You're free this afternoon, right? It's a weekday--we'll have the place to ourselves."

I was weakening. "I'll have to cancel my office hours."

He winked. "I'll never tell."

An hour later we stood on a shelf of rock by the waters of the large lake west of town. This was the only clothing-optional public waterfront in the state, a relic of slower, more laid-back days. Some rich nudist had deeded the land to the state on the condition that it be kept a clothing-optional park in perpetuity. Thanks to him, people in this area could still get naked and lounge by the water with beer in hand, as if this were still the seventies.

We were lucky and found a spot with a jutting overhang of limestone above, getting shade and a bit of privacy.

I hesitated when the moment of truth arrived, but Drew calmly peeled off his clothes and started applying sunscreen.

"Do my back, would you, Glenn?"

I obliged. As soon as I was done, Drew jumped in the water and swam out with strong, sure strokes. I stripped and breast stroked leisurely after him. Maybe this would be okay, after all. I could enjoy the sun and the water and Drew's good company. Not bad for an afternoon when I should have been working.

I got out first and perched on my towel. Drew was at the line of floats that marked the edge of the swimming area. I watched his body cut gracefully through the water.

After a while he turned and began swimming back. In a few minutes he emerged, muscled and dripping, blond hair darkened by the water and plastered to his skull, a pagan god in full glory. His cock hung flaccid between his legs, his heavy, full balls swinging beneath.

Drew picked up his towel. "The water," he announced, "is magnificent. This is the best, Glenn. Thanks for bringing me out here."

I nodded, not trusting my voice.

Suddenly he crouched before me, so close that I sensed the moist heat rising from his body, smelled the coconut fragrance of sunscreen, felt his warm breath on my face. Before I could react he leaned forward, cocked his head to one side and pressed his lips to mine.

"I've been wanting to do that ever since I saw you," Drew whispered.

I sat stunned for a moment, then rose and picked up my towel. I started gathering my things and stuffing them into the duffel bag I had brought.

"Whoa," Drew said, laughing, "What did I do?" I continued to pack, ignoring him.

"Glenn, are you abandoning me? We came in your car."

"I'm sure you can find someone to give you a ride." Where the hell were my shoes?

"Geez, you're really mad. C'mon, lighten up. What's a little kiss between friends?" I faced him. "Can't you get the message? I'm not interested."

Drew's expression was challenging. "Then why did you come out here with me? Why'd you flash your hard-on at me? I didn't imagine that."

My shoulders sagged. "Why won't you just leave me alone?"

His gaze didn't waver. "Do I have to spell it out? Because you're smart. Funny. And fucking hot. Because I want you, Glenn."

"Don't." I turned away. I wanted to punch something, maybe scream--anything to keep from turning again and falling to my knees in front of him.

I felt his warm presence behind me. A strong arm encircled my chest and pulled me against his chest. At the same time his other hand grasped my cock. His warm breath tickled my ear.

"C'mon," Drew whispered. "Go for it."

Memories came crowding back into my head. Another strong male body close to mine, a hand around my hardening cock. Another low voice murmuring into my ear. A man I had loved, lost to me forever.

Pain that I thought I would never feel again rose in my chest. I tried to hold back the tears that were spilling from underneath my closed eyelids, but couldn't.

"Please," I choked out. Drew finally figured out that something was wrong. He let me go and backed away. I sank down toward the rock, fighting to regain control.

"Glenn, I'm sorry. Whatever I did--"

I waved one hand back at him. "Not you." The tears kept coming, as fast as my other hand could wipe them away. As upset as I was I was also mortified that Drew was seeing me like this, naked and blubbering.

Long moments passed before I finally started getting hold of myself. I turned, trying to think of something to say. Drew wasn't there.

Still sniffling, I looked further. My younger colleague was sitting on his towel some distance away, his broad back to me, looking at the water. After a moment I picked up my towel and went toward him.

Drew turned as I approached. "You all right?" was all he said.

I nodded, not yet trusting myself to speak, and unfolded my towel next to his. We sat silent.

"I'm sorry, Glenn."

"It's not your fault."

"Feel like talking about it?"

I looked up, startled. He looked at me, his eyes direct as always. My mouth opened, intending to utter a refusal.

"Before I came to Steelman I taught at a small school in Oklahoma. New College of the Nazarene. Ever heard of it?"

Drew's expression was wry. "Nope. A Christian school in Oklahoma. I can guess what kind of place it was."

I nodded. "You got it. I knew what I was in for, but I needed the job. I figured I'd teach my classes and do my work, and just hibernate the rest of the time while I looked for something else."

"But you found someone."

"Yes. His name was Dirk. He had an office down the hall from me. He had been teaching there a couple of years, in economics. Married, of course."

"That didn't stop him, did it?"

"No." I laughed a little through my tears. "I was so naive. I actually thought all married men were straight. Imagine how shocked I was when one day after a racketball game he hit on me in the gym shower."

"Let me guess. He was cute."

"Oh God, yes. Blond hair, tight body, blue eyes. Quite a bit like yours." I looked at Drew. He looked back at me. Nothing was in his gaze right now except sympathy. "I was going crazy with loneliness. I'm sure you can do the math."

"What happened?"

"We got careless. A female student who had a crush on him claimed she saw us kissing. The administration hauled us both into a hearing. We could have stood firm and denied it. It was our word against hers. Dirk caved in under the pressure, though."

"Blamed you."

I felt the tears rising again. I could have stood it all, except his betrayal. "The church elders on the board bought his story that he'd been seduced by the evil homosexual. After all, how could he be gay, with a wife and little baby? They paid me until the end of that year, but they kicked me out right away. Told me to clean out my office, barred me from campus.

"Word got around town, of course. The anonymous phone calls and hateful e-mails went on until I left. Some of it was pretty scary."

"Bastards."

"The worst thing was Dirk freezing me out. He wouldn't return my calls or answer my messages. When I ran into him at the store or other places he'd look right through me, as if I didn't exist."

"By the time I got here I was a basket case. Sold cars, worked in a bank, tried to forget the whole thing. But I wanted to teach. I knew I was good at it. I got hired on at Steelman as an adjunct teaching an extra section of U.S. History one fall. When a tenure-track position opened up after a couple of years, I applied for it.

"I'd done a good job as an adjunct, but inside candidates aren't always shoo-ins. To get a full-time job I had to interview with the administration. I was a wreck. I figured someone would bring up my past record. But Jon Evans was great."

"The Provost?"

I nodded. "He cut to the chase right away. 'Glenn,' he said, 'I'm aware of the circumstances under which you left your previous full-time position, and I'm also aware they had nothing to do with your abilities as a teacher and scholar. Here at Steelman we take the position that private lives of faculty members are their own business--as long as they don't break the law or cause harm to the institution.'"

Drew nodded. "I liked him when I had my interview."

"It wasn't till months later I found out he was family."

He whistled. "Really."

I nodded. "Not only that, he'd caused quite a stir years ago when a male student who had just graduated from Steelman moved in with him. So he could relate to what I'd been through. Says a lot for him that even with all that they promoted him from the ranks when the head job opened up."


The Halls of Academe Ch. 01



"So what are you afraid of, Glenn?"

His voice had changed. I looked up and saw that his eyes had, too. The heat was back in them.

"What do you mean?"

"You got burned. That was then, this is now. It's not going to happen again at Steelman. How long are you going to let the past keep you from being happy?"

"Easy for you to say." Now I was getting pissed. "You've never had a rough day in your life. Your talent. Your looks. It's been smooth sailing for you all the way. How do you know what it was like for me? What it's like now? You don't."

Drew stared at me, then gave a curt nod. "You're right, I don't."

"Besides, I'm your chair. How can I evaluate you objectively, if we're sleeping together? Or maybe that's what you want, to compromise my objectivity."

He shook his head in disbelief. "Is that what you think of me--I'm trying to fuck my way to the top? Let me tell you something, Mr. Chairman." He leaned close to me and once again the force of his presence struck me like a blow. "I know what I feel for you. But if you can't see that, then fine. There's nothing I can do."

He turned away, picked up his underwear and started to dress. "Now, can you take me home?"

There wasn't anything else to say. We drove back to town, mostly in silence. When I dropped him off at his apartment, Drew didn't ask me to come in.

"Thanks for the afternoon. See you around," he said, then was gone.

I sat in my car, staring straight ahead. What I said had worked. Our relationship was going to stay on the level, and I wouldn't have to deal with a messy affair with a colleague. All well and good.

It didn't feel good, though. My heart was a lump of lead in my chest. I heaved a sigh, put the car in gear and drove slowly home.

TO BE CONTINUED... 



The Halls of Academe Ch. 02



After that abortive trip to the lake the semester went on. I was glad when things got busy the way they always did toward the end, as it left me little time to think about Drew and whatever relationship we had, which wasn't much. When I saw him around our building he was pleasant, but remote.

He stopped coming by to my office to chat, even after class hours. If we happened both to be staying late he'd say hello, go into his office and shut the door. Somehow our workouts at the pool no longer coincided either.

I couldn't blame Drew. Hadn't I told him to back off? I swallowed my hurt pride when he gave me the brushoff, and tried to convince myself it was for the best.

People who knew us both began to notice something was amiss. One day during my office hours I heard a knock. A female voice said, "Got a minute?" I was disappointed it wasn't Drew. "Hello, Marsh. What's up?"

Marcia Hannon was our specialist in European History. There had never been any doubt about her getting tenure, which had happened a couple of years back. She was pushing forty but, with her petite figure and lively sense of humor, seemed younger. The students loved her, despite her reputation for giving some of the hardest essay exams on campus.

She approached me and sat in a nearby chair. "Just wondered, Glenn--did you turn in the check requisition for our Ambrose series speaker?"

I clapped my hand to my forehead. "Damn, that totally slipped my mind. Have I really screwed up this time?"

Marcia was unperturbed. "Not really. If you get it in by the end of the day today the business office can still have it ready when Dr. Gill gets here. Otherwise, we'll have to tell him we'll mail his honorarium. That might be a little embarrassing, considering how small it is."

"For sure. Thanks for the reminder. Ever thought of being chair?"

She rolled her eyes. "Please. Don't even joke about that. Although," she added, peering at me, "You do look like you could use a sabbatical."

"That bad, huh?" I kept my tone light. I didn't want to get into why I might be so stressed. Marcia leaned forward and lowered her voice.

"Golden Ohlen isn't giving you grief, is he?"

I was taken by surprise. "What? No. What about you?"

Marcia shrugged. "He and I are cool. Of course, we're in different fields so he doesn't see me as competition. Some of the other faculty aren't so keen about him, though. I heard a certain person who shall remain nameless trashing him in the Commons at lunch the other day."

"He wasn't an English professor with the initials E.L., by any chance?"

She smirked.

"I might have known." Despite our recent break I felt compelled to defend Drew. "You know what his problem is. Jealousy, plain and simple. Elden Lewis wishes he could have gotten an article into a top-tier journal when he was a grad student. Have a book manuscript under review by Stanford University Press."

"I grant you all of that. Still, Drew brings some of it on himself, you know. If I had all those credentials--and looked like Brad Pitt to boot--I'd be a bit more gracious to those less fortunate than me."

I smiled. "Everyone knows you are graciousness personified, Marcia."

She laughed. "Flattery will get you nowhere. I am not taking the department chair from you." She rose. "Good luck, Glenn. I don't envy you having to write Drew's first-year evaluation."

"What am I going to give him besides an unqualified rave? Everyone's still in shock that he actually came here."

She raised her eyebrows. "Well, I shouldn't spread rumors, but from what I've overheard some of my students saying, he's not knocking them dead in his classes this semester. He might need your help."

I tried to keep my voice calm and detached. "Assuming he'd accept any from me."

She gave me a curious look. "Yes, there is that. Take care, Glenn."

I sat and thought about what Marcia had said. So it wasn't all smooth sailing for Drew Ohlen at Steelman College. Brilliant scholars weren't always great teachers. In fact, they could be downright lousy. If Drew really was having a lot of trouble relating to the students here, it was my duty as his chair and mentor to help him. 

Trouble was, I couldn't bring myself to do it. I remembered the scorn in his eyes at my stupid remark about compromising my objectivity. In that one moment I'd lost his respect. I could imagine what his reaction would be if I offered my help.

I'd rejected Drew to keep our professional relationship intact. Now I didn't even have that cold comfort.

"Coward," I said to the empty air. No one contradicted me.

*** 

"Glenn?" I wheeled around, startled. I was standing in the men's locker room of the Steelman College natatorium. It was the third of January, the week before classes would start for spring semester.

I had gone that afternoon to start working off the extra pounds that always managed to climb on me and hitch a ride during the holidays. The campus was almost deserted and I hadn't expected to see anyone at the pool, other than the student lifeguard trying to make a few extra dollars over the break. 

"Drew...how are you?" My heart was thudding, and not only from surprise. I hadn't seen Drew Ohlen for several weeks, since he had been back in L.A. over the break. He was dressed in workout clothes, shorts, singlet and new shoes, all of which set off a glowing California tan. Of course he hadn't gained an ounce. He looked great. 

Just my luck that he'd caught me at this moment. I'd stripped down to nothing and just put on the swimmer jock I always wore under my suit to hold me in place. Even though he had already seen me naked I blushed, acutely aware of my stomach above the waistband. I hurried into my trunks.

Drew didn't seem to notice my embarrassment.

"Fine. Listen, can I come talk to you before school starts?"

This was a change. "Sure. What's up?"

He sighed, put his hands on his hips and looked at the floor. "I need some help."

"What's wrong?" Now I was really concerned.

He smiled. "Didn't mean to scare you. I need to talk to you about my fall course evals. Have you looked at them yet?"

"To be honest, no." I was supposed to look at the course evaluations for junior faculty in my department after each semester was over, but had put that task off.

"Well, just so you'll know. They're terrible. I knew there were some problems but I didn't think they'd be this bad. I'm really worried. If the Provost sees them he'll fire me on the spot."

"He wouldn't do that." I'd seen junior faculty in this state before. It was always a shock to read the things some students would say when they knew they would be anonymous. They could be vicious.

"How about tomorrow at one, Drew? Bring your copies and we'll go over them and figure out what we can do. Trust me, it's not as bad as you think. We can turn this around."

Drew sighed again. "If you say so. Thanks, Glenn. I'll see you tomorrow."

He had sought me out for the first time in many weeks. I should have been overjoyed, but I wasn't. I was determined to stick to business, help Drew become the good teacher I knew he could be. That was all.

But after several weeks of not thinking of him, I knew the way I'd seen him today, tanned and fit, muscular shoulders bare, chest hair peeking out of the low collar of his singlet--that image was going to haunt me tonight as I tried to sleep. 

I stood in my trunks, glad that the jock had held my goods in place. The pouch was stretched full. If I hadn't been wearing it things could have gotten embarrassing. 

The next day we sat in my office and paged through the copies he had brought me of his evaluations. 

I tried not to let Drew see my reaction, but I was concerned. He hadn't been exaggerating. This wasn't a case of one or two disgruntled students. The same negative comments appeared over and over again. Unless everyone in a class had conspired to "get" Drew--not likely--the fact that so many students had said the same things meant they just might be true. 

"Well," I finally said, "We're going to have to figure out why they think you're not concerned about them. Also why they score you so low on being open to diverse views."

"Glenn, what am I supposed to do? Sure, these kids are bright, but lots of them have been brainwashed by Texas public education. I think they got pissed last fall when they found out they didn't know everything."

"And you do, Drew? Know everything, I mean?"

He blinked. "No, of course not. C'mon, you know me better than that."

"I do. But these kids in your first semester World History Survey don't. They're running scared, feeling academic pressure, some of them for the first time. It's easy to crush them, make them feel small. That seems to be what you're doing." 

"So what should I do?"

"Don't just lecture. Get them involved. Ask them questions, what they think. Then listen to what they say, no matter how stupid it seems. Find something that you can work with."

"But there's material I've got to cover. What if they wander off-track?"

"Then you steer them back. Remind them what the topic is. Call their attention to specific passages in the reading that you want them to consider."

Drew was silent, then shook his head. "This is going to be really difficult."

I let my voice harden. "Teaching is as important as research here. Do you want to be a good teacher, or not? Do you want to get tenure, or not?"

He looked up, startled. I backed off, just a bit. "Drew, you've met and overcome challenges before in your career. This is just another one. I'll help you all I can." "How?"

"Well, let's work on one class. The second semester World History Survey, since it's going to be your biggest, and it has a lot of General Ed students in it. With your permission, I'll sit in at least once a week--more if I can--and observe. Then let's set up a weekly meeting and talk about what I saw."

I was aware of Drew looking at me. I kept talking.

"I also recommend that you do a midterm course evaluation. Pass out the same form if you like, or you can make up one yourself. That way, you still have time to make changes if things aren't going well. I'll go over those with you too, of course."

"How are you going to find the time to do all this?"

I shrugged. "I'll make the time. This is important."

Drew leaned forward. There was a look in his eyes I hadn't seen in quite a while. My heart began to beat faster.

"Glenn, I can't tell you how much I appreciate this."

I kept my voice casual. "Thanks not needed. It's my job."

"Spending hours a week helping one faculty member is not part of your job." Drew got up to go. I heard him say under his breath, "Damn, I wish--"

"What?"

He looked back, his eyes neutral again. "Nothing. See you Monday at nine? Room 103."

So I started observing Drew Ohlen's World History class. At first the students were curious, but after a few sessions they soon forgot I was there. Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday for several weeks I sat quietly in the back of the classroom.

The class had eighteen students in it, large for a discussion-based class but not unmanageable. After a very short time I made a surprising discovery: teaching in this format made Drew nervous. All the signs were there. He talked fast, too fast for some students to follow. He cut them off when he thought he knew what they were going to say. He moved around the classroom without a clear purpose. And though he had worried about the students wandering off track, in fact he was the one that went off on tangents.

He was aghast when I told him all of this.

"I really do that?" he said, several times. I nodded.

"If you want to see for yourself, we can try videotaping a session or two. The students will really notice, though. It'll change the entire dynamic of the class."

"No, we don't need to do that." Drew shook his head. "I just can't believe I'm so bad at this."

I tried to reassure him. "These aren't huge problems, Drew. Look, the students can tell you know your stuff. They just want to feel like they're partners in the learning experience."

His smile was crooked. "You know and I know that the last thing graduate school does is make you feel like a partner in the learning experience. If we're motivated, we learn everything we need to know. Everything except how to teach."

"Well, better late than never."

"I thought my student days were finally over. Guess not."

I looked at him as he bent over the notes I had given him. This was a different Drew from the confident Adonis who had swaggered into our department for his interview last spring and bowled us over. Against my better judgment I found myself missing that man. Maybe with my help he'd be back soon enough.

"I forgot to say one thing. I've really enjoyed watching you teach."

He snorted. "Like hell."

"I really have." It was the truth. Despite his problems in the classroom, Drew's brilliance and ease in handling complex topics was breathtaking. Often he went over students' heads, true, but I could appreciate the quality of his mind.

What I didn't tell him was that I also appreciated the chance to sit and stare at him for hours every week, watching his blue eyes flash every time he got excited. Or waiting for that glowing, irresistible smile to break out. Or tracing the V-shape of his back and shoulders with my eyes when he turned to write on the board. Checking out his tight butt in the fitted khakis he wore to perfection.

I could lust after him to my heart's content, and no one was the wiser.

Gradually Drew's teaching improved. He seemed more at ease, making jokes, poking fun at himself. The students noticed this and were more willing to speak up. Discussions got livelier and there was frequent laughter. A unit on the role of women in traditional society precipitated a fiery debate, when Drew asked the class to think about whether things had changed all that much in the modern world.

I stopped him in the hall after that class and gave him the thumbs-up sign. He nodded, flushed with excitement, and said, "Yeah, that went pretty well, didn't it?"

"It was great. You really got them fired up."

He shook his head. "I'm amazed I can do that." Self-deprecation was another skill at which Drew was improving.

I put my hand on his shoulder, shivering inside at the small liberty I was taking. "You're passing out the mid-term evaluations next week, right? I bet you're going to be happy with what they say."

"Damn, I can't believe it," Drew said. We were in my office a week later, course evaluation forms in an untidy pile on my desk.

"I think this is what they call a slam dunk," I said, keeping my voice level, though I was as excited as he was.

"I especially like this one. 'I can't believe this is the same professor I had for World History I last semester.'" Drew laughed as he picked up another form. "Or this one. 'I enjoy listening to him as much as looking at him.' Can you believe a freshman woman would write that?"

"Might not be a woman," I suggested.

He didn't pick up on my remark, just leaned back in the chair and heaved a sigh. "I don't mind telling you, Glenn, I was really scared. Scared I wouldn't be able to do this." He sat forward again and looked directly at me. "Thank you. Now let me take you to dinner, to repay you a little bit for all you've done for me."

It was a late February day, already warm, and the sun was shining into my office. What I really wanted was for him to suggest we go to the lake again. That wasn't going to happen.

I said, "Thanks, that would be great."

He grinned. "I get to pick the place. I am a first-year Assistant Prof, remember."

Drew's taste in dining out ran to cheap Mexican, lubricated with strong margaritas. As the evening wore on we got more and more boisterous. He regaled me with irreverent anecdotes about famous scholars that he had worked with--people I could only dream of meeting.

He finally paid the check and we left the restaurant, lurching a bit but trying our best to appear sober and composed as we got in my car. Fortunately we were only a few blocks from the Steelman campus and my house.

"Oh, damn," I said, as we approached the limestone buildings of the college.

"What's the matter?" Drew asked.

"Well, there's a report I've got to read tonight, not that I'm in any shape to. Mind if I stop by the office and get it?"

Drew grinned. "Such a workaholic."

We pulled into the parking lot and I got out. To my surprise Drew opened his door.

"I'll come with you. I need to walk some of that tequila off."

The building was locked, so I used my passkey and punched the code in to disable the alarm. Our footsteps echoed off the tiled floor of the corridor.

We reached my office door, unlocked it and went in. My desk was in its usual chaotic state. I forgot about Drew as I rummaged among the various piles.

"Where the hell is that Religion Department report? I am not going to ask the Provost's Office for another copy. Here it is. Thank god--"

I turned with the looseleaf binder in my hand and recoiled, startled. Drew was behind me, his face inches from my own. His warm breath, fragrant with alcohol, bathed my face.

His strong hands grasped my shoulders.

"Glenn. Listen to me. Please."

"What is it?"

His blue eyes were dark with emotion.

"I want to apologize."

"Apologize? For what?"

He lowered his eyes and shook his head. "For being such an asshole last fall. Rushing things. Trying to force you into bed with me. If you only knew how many times I've beat myself up for doing that."

"There's no need for you to do that."

His eyes pierced mine again. "Yes, there is."

"Drew--"

He shook his head. "I was a cocky, arrogant fool. I thought I teaching here would be a breeze. That everyone would just fall in love with me, including you." He let me go and turned away. "I know better now, but it's too late. Because I've lost you."

I reached out and grasped his shoulder, feeling the muscle knotted beneath his shirt. 

"It's not too late."

He turned, startled. "What?"

Now it was my turn to eat crow. I wanted him so badly but even so the words stuck in my throat.

"I've thought about that day at the lake."

Drew's face and neck flushed a deep red. His hand went to the back of his neck, and a rueful grin appeared on his face. "Please, don't remind me."

"It's not that. I didn't make you back off because I didn't want you."

He said nothing.

"I said no because I did want you. Like crazy. So much that it was scaring me to death." Drew's mouth opened, but no words came out. I rushed on.

"I've done a lot of thinking since then. You were right about everything. I can't believe I have the nerve to ask, but I'm wondering if the offer's still open."

A long silence. Finally Drew spoke. "What about that stuff you said? About professionalism? About, how did you put it, compromising your objectivity?"

I shook my head in disgust. "All bullshit. Chairspeak. I've gotten really good at it."

We looked at each other. My heart skipped a beat as I saw a slow smile spread across Drew's face.

"Maybe it's time to stop talking."

He raised a hand toward my face. I caught at it in mid-air and pressed it, hard, to my lips. He gathered me into his arms. At last I was where I had dreamed of being, pressed against his chest. I heard his heart beating, as loud and fast as mine.

We stood, rocking back and forth. As much as Drew's physical being had filled my fantasies over the past months, at that moment I felt nothing sexual, just simple tenderness.

Then Drew pressed his lips to mine and tenderness was gone. We kissed frantically, tongues, lips and teeth grinding and clashing against one another. I ran my hands over his body, marveling at the hardness of his torso. When I started to pull his shirt out of his pants, though, he stopped me.




The Halls of Academe Ch. 02



"No office blow job," he said. "We're doing this right."

I nodded. "My house is two blocks from here. I'm warning you, it's a mess."

Drew laughed. "I'll never tell."

He chuckled again in my bedroom when he saw the stacks of papers piled on the table by the bed.

"Don't you ever stop working, Glenn?" he asked, as he unbuttoned my shirt.

I shrugged. "I've never had anything else to do here at night." I gasped as his fingers found one of my nipples. Drew smirked.

"That's going to change."

He pulled my shirt off and gazed at my chest. I blushed.

"Drew, do you really think--I have a hot body?"

He smiled. "Would I lie to my department chair?"

My insecurities came rushing back. "You're so damn beautiful. You make me feel old and fat."

Drew shook his head. "I'm just me. You want to know the truth? The day I saw you in the locker room at the beginning of the semester, I had to go home and jack off."

"Really?"

He nodded as he undid my belt. "Mm hmm. You looked so fucking hot in that jockstrap. Ran out of the gym, hoping no one would see my woodie."

I ran my hand across the hardening bulge under his fly. "You were a cocky little devil, feeling me up at the airport."

Drew laughed as he undressed. "Look who's talking. Here I am about to do my teaching demonstration and a search committee member's checking me out in the bathroom mirror. Talk about pressure."

By now I had his dick in my hand. I gazed at it, feeling its hardening heat, marveling at the beauty of the male anatomy. I shook my head. "I'd never thought I'd get to touch it."

Drew's voice was soft. "It's all yours, baby."

I fell to my knees to worship my idol. I drew him into my mouth, savoring the different textures, smooth hard knob and bumpy, veined shaft. I tasted the salt of his precum. I pressed forward until the head of his cock was about gag me, his dark blond pubes tickling my nose. Above me Drew sighed and ran his hands through my hair.

"Mm, nice. Suck it."

I gathered his nuts into my hand as I slid back and forth on his shaft. In the midst of my labors strong hands grabbed me under the arms and pulled me to my feet.

I was disappointed. "Why'd you make me stop?"

Drew smiled. "You're too good. I was getting too close."

"I want you to cum in my mouth. I want to taste it."

He shook his head. "Not yet."

In another moment our remaining clothes were on the floor and I was stretched out on my back, Drew crouching over me. His mouth surrounded first my cock, then my balls, engulfing them with warm wet heat. I felt his tongue moving down the ridge behind my nut sack, between my legs. I let out a moan as it began to tickle and tease my asshole.

Drew made muffled sounds of approval as he burrowed between my cheeks, his strong arms lifting my legs high as he ate out my hole. Finally he came up for air. His face appeared between my legs, reddened and wet from his exertions, plastered with a wicked grin.

"Damn, you're hot," he said. "You ready?"

"Ready for what?" I said, puzzled. Then I realized what he meant. "Oh, no," I said, smiling to cover up my anxiety. "I don't do that--get fucked, I mean."

Drew's face fell, then I saw his jaw set. He was not going to take that as a final answer. "Why not?"

I thought about making something up, but what came out of my mouth was the truth. "Drew, I've never done it. Been bottom, I mean."

He was incredulous. "Never?"

I felt silly and ashamed. "Dirk is the only man I ever had sex with more than once, and he never wanted to. I've never had anyone who cared enough to show me how to do it right."

His gaze was steady, magnetic. "I care. Can you trust me?"

I looked into his eyes, his eager, handsome face. I saw his body, the massive shoulders and muscled chest, the bulging biceps. Finally I looked at the swollen rod jutting from between his legs, the prize he was offering. I tried to imagine how it would feel inside me. I couldn't. 

I nodded. "Okay."

In a flash his hands cupped my face and his lips were on mine. "You won't regret it."

My smile was weak, the doubts already surfacing. Drew, however, appeared to have none. He reached down, picked up his pants from the floor and drew out a somewhat worn square of foil from his wallet. I laughed.

"You devil. Were you planning this all along?"

Drew smiled. "No comment. Got any lube?"

I clicked my tongue. "I don't know if I have anything."

Drew got off the bed and went toward the bathroom. At the door he turned. "Trust me, every gay man has something in his medicine cabinet that'll work."

I chuckled despite my anxiety. The swaggering stud was back. Drew might have deferred to me where classroom teaching was concerned, but here in the bedroom he was in charge.

In a moment he reappeared, carrying a plastic tube, a glistening sheath of latex over his swinging erection. "What did I tell you? Water-based moisturizer. The label even says 'oil-free.'"

He got onto the bed and stretched out on his back, propping himself upon one elbow. His other hand grasped my arm.

"Okay, guy. You on top to start."

In another moment I was squatting over him, shivering as his hand rubbed cold gel between my cheeks. My own cock was rock hard. No doubt about it, my body wanted this to happen.

Drew grasped his cock and guided it into position. "Now, let yourself down. Nice and easy."

Hesitantly I obeyed, feeling the blunt head of his cock press at my resisting hole. The pressure increased, until suddenly it broke through the ring of muscle. Searing pain shot through me and I cried out, straightening as fast as I could so that he popped out again.

"Oh shit--I can't."

"Yes, you can." Drew's voice was commanding. I looked at him. His expression was firm, reassuring. His hand gripped my arm, preventing my escape. 

"Just wait a minute and try again. Trust me, it's going to work."

The force of his desire stilled the protests on my lips. Instead I took some deep breaths, tried to relax. Finally I began to lower my body onto him a second time.

My heart thudded as I felt him pressing once more against me, slowly invading my unwilling hole. His thickness stretched me to the limit, until all of a sudden my sphincter muscles closed around him and he was inside. I had just enough time to register that it didn't hurt, when Drew grabbed me with both arms and pushed my body downward. I screamed as his cock surged through me in a huge thrust and I came to rest with my butt pressed against his pubic bone.

I turned my face to the ceiling, half sobbing, half laughing. The sensation of having my ass filled with cock for the first time was indescribable. The most carefully guarded place in my body had been invaded in brutal, final fashion, leaving total and unconditional surrender as my only option. I had been waiting for this moment all my life. 

Just as that realization hit me Drew sat bolt upright, forcing me down. I hit the mattress on my back, hard enough to knock the wind out of me.

"What the--" His eyes bored into mine as he turned himself, pressing his weight onto me. My legs were hooked over his shoulders, my body bent double, my ass impaled with his cock.

"Now," Drew said, "We're going to get down to business. I'm going to be on top when I fuck you, Mr. Chairman. Any objections?"

I closed my eyes and concentrated on the feel of his rod inside me. I opened them again and looked into his face. His expression was as intense as I'd ever seen it. I shook my head.

Drew smiled. "Good."

I reached for my cock but he grabbed my hand.

"Uh-uh. You cum when I want you to. And it's not going to be soon."

I wondered how long I could endure this position. My back was already starting to ache. Drew read my mind.

"Don't worry, Glenn. I'll make you forget everything except how good you feel." He kept his promise. Even now I can feel every moment of that first fuck, the sweet, long agony as he slowly withdrew, the anticipation of the moment when he would plunge into me again, making the bed and my body shake with the force of his thrust. I cried out every time he hit bottom, drawing a smile of satisfaction from him.

After a while he sat up and leaned backward, holding my hips and pulling the lower half of my body into his lap, my shoulders and head still resting on the mattress. In this position he began to move his hips again, and an involuntary groan escaped from me at the shocks of pleasure that exploded in my brain every time the head of his dick hit my prostate. Drew grinned again at my reaction to this new sensation.

"You can feel that, can't you?"

He teased me a while longer, avoiding full penetration, then bent me double again and sank into me up to the hilt, his balls pressed against my butt. His hips swung into action and he gradually accelerated the pace of his thrusts to a steady, relentless pounding. My eyes closed and my head lolled on the pillow as I let him have his way with me. 

I don't know how long Drew Ohlen fucked me that night, but he not only broke through the protective shell I'd carefully constructed around myself since those awful days in Oklahoma, he smashed it to little pieces. After a while I was a baby in his arms, helpless and whimpering. Begging for more. Hoping it would never end. 

My arms encircled his back and drew him down toward me. I felt the heat of his driving body, his sweet breath on my face. His musky scent filled my nostrils. Sweat dripped from his brow onto my cheek.

His hungry mouth sought mine and found it. We tongue-wrestled as he continued to plow me.

"Fuck me, Drew," I said, when we broke apart. He nodded.

"You got it, man."

I tightened my hole around his piston. Drew nodded approval. "Mm hmm. Sweet ass. So fucking tight."

He grabbed my own aching dick and began to stroke it, his eyes spearing me. "Ready to cum for me? Let me see you squirt."

I nodded as my breath quickened. Drew's eyes never left my face as he propelled me toward orgasm. "C'mon guy, that's it. Let me have it."

Incoherent, broken words came from my mouth as I felt myself approach the point of no return.

"Oh God, oh yes, yes...fuck YES!"

With a shout I went over the edge, but forced my eyes open long enough to see the first jets of sperm arc from the bursting head of my dick. I gave in then, squeezing them shut and grunting helplessly as I blew my load all over my heaving chest and belly. 

"Uh-huh. Beautiful. Do it guy," Drew murmured. His thrusts increased in force and speed until he was drilling into me. "Fuck... I'm cumming. Oh shit!" I tightened my ass muscles as hard as I could, trying to draw him into me even further as his rod throbbed, delivering its cum into the rubber deep inside of me. I opened my eyes and looked up. Drew's body was in spasm, his back arched, his face frozen in a grimace of agony and ecstasy. All at once he let go and collapsed onto me with his full weight. We lay, embracing, hanging on to one another, stuck together with my cum, recovering from the tornado that had ripped through our bodies. 

After a while Drew raised himself on his hands and smiled down at me.

"You okay, Glenn?"

I smiled back. "Never better."

A trace of anxiety appeared in his eyes. "I wasn't too rough, was I? Did I hurt you?"

I shook my head, trying to clear the stars dancing in front of my eyes. "I don't think so. I'm not so sure about the bed, though."

Drew chuckled. "It's been a long time since I got carried away like that. That'll teach you to play hard to get."

My smile faded. "I was such an idiot."

He shook his head. "Don't worry about it." He leaned down and kissed me. "You were worth the wait." He started to withdraw. My ass muscles clamped down on him, not wanting to let him go. He laughed. 

"C'mon, baby. I'll be back soon, I promise."

Finally released, he headed into the bathroom while I stretched my stiff legs and back. I caught a glimpse of the rubber covering his still semi-erect cock, ballooning with his cum. After a while he returned, now swinging free, holding a towel. He wiped me off and gathered me into his arms. I lay against the light covering of fur on his chest, content beyond imagining. At that moment it would have been enough to lie in bed with Drew for the rest of my life. 

Soon enough, though, the usual gremlins awoke inside and began to stir. I shifted and sighed.

"You okay?"

"Tomorrow morning," I told him, "I'm going to Jon's office and resign as chair of the history department."

"Who's going to help me with my teaching?" He looked worried.

"I can stop by your class any time, but you're turning things around, Drew. Those midterm evals prove it. Just stay on course and you'll be fine."

"I don't know what I'd have done if you hadn't been there for me." Drew put his hands behind his head and looked up at the ceiling. "I know you think it's the right thing to do, but I'm sorry about it anyway."

I shrugged. "Helping you has been worth it, but otherwise, it's just a title. The extra money's for shit. Doesn't begin to make up for the paperwork and aggravation. Now that it appears we have a relationship it'd be cleaner if I weren't your direct supervisor."

Drew chuckled. "'It appears we have a relationship.' I guess that's one way to put it." He pulled my softening cock and wiggled his brow. "If Elden Lewis could see us now."

"How did you know? He actually lives next door. Believe me, I didn't plan that."

Drew shook his head. "I guess it takes all kinds to make a university, but I could do without him. Think he's watching out his window to see if I leave tonight?"

I sighed. "I'd love for you to stay, but--"

A wry expression appeared on Drew's face. "I know. One step at a time. Having taken your virginity I don't think I should ask for any more." His mouth descended on mine in a long and lingering kiss. Finally he broke away. "I'd better stop or I won't leave."

He rose from the bed. I felt a pang of regret at the sight of his nakedness, about to be lost to me again. Drew dressed quickly, then bent down and kissed me one last time.

"See you at school, professor. Meet at the pool at noon?"

"I don't know. Seeing you in that Speedo--I'm not sure I could control myself."

Drew snorted. "After the way you've kept me at arm's length this year? You're the champion of control."

Words rose to my lips. Not any more. Not after what you did to me tonight. Instead I said, "If you say so. Night."

He hugged me one more time. "Night, Glenn."

I lay awake long after Drew had gone, reliving all that had happened that night, smiling, frowning, once in a while laughing out loud. My world had been turned upside down with stunning speed. I was terrified, but also exhilarated. No matter how it ended, the ride would be one to remember.

I had no idea just how memorable things were going to get.

TO BE CONTINUED... 



The Halls of Academe Ch. 03



 Revised version copyright 2006 by the author. 

"Glenn, why do you want to do this?" Jon Evans asked. We were in his spacious office in the main administration building.

After almost three decades at Steelman College, ten years of it as Provost, Jon's hair had turned silver from its original dark brown. His eyes, though, were still that color, bright and slightly too prominent, giving him a look of perpetual inquiry. They were set in an angular, intelligent face.

"And why now? Why not finish out the year?"

I was going to have to tell the whole story, as I'd suspected.

"You know Drew, of course."

"Of course. A bright young addition to your department, and to the Steelman faculty."

"He and I have, well, become involved."

A pause. "I see." I couldn't read anything from Jon's expression.

"To continue as his chair, specifically, to evaluate his first-year performance would be a conflict of interest. That's why I'm asking to be replaced."

"How long has this been going on?"

"As of last night."

Jon Evans chuckled. "You don't waste any time." He grew sober again. "I agree that this could create some awkwardness, possibly damage morale within your department if you're not careful. However," he smiled, "You're going to be hard to replace. You've been chair quite a while, and a good one. You think Marcia could do it?" I thought of Marcia's reaction when I'd teased her about being chair. "She won't be pleased. Not one bit."

"You see what I mean? And she's the likeliest candidate. How about terminating this thing with Drew if I raise your chair's stipend?" Jon laughed at what must have been my shocked expression. "I'm only teasing. I know you never would."

He was silent for a minute. "How about this. I'll relieve you of the responsibility of writing Drew's first-year evaluation. Surely Marcia would be willing to take on that one task. You stay on as chair until the end of the spring, while I soften her up about taking over next year. What do you think?"

I did some quick thinking. "There's just one problem. Marcia's going to have to know why she's doing Drew's evaluation."

"True. The other alternative would be for me to do it. I'm not sure, however, that would be fair to Drew. It's important that faculty be evaluated first by other faculty."

He had me there. This was a cornerstone of Steelman's governance system.

"Okay," I said at last. "I'll just have to swear her to secrecy."

"Glenn, may I offer some unsolicited advice?"

"Of course."

"Marcia is a good person. She'll keep your secret. But trust me, people are going to find out. Do you remember what I said at your candidate interview?"

I looked at the floor. "How could I forget? I owe you my career."

"I still believe what I said then. But you and Drew can do a lot to minimize fallout by the way you conduct yourselves."

Jon leaned forward and lowered his voice. He was talking to me now as a friend, not as an administrator.

"You know of course that Kevin is a Steelman alum. He and I started our relationship after he graduated, and well after he had been in one of my classes. But to this day you'll hear that I seduced him when he was my student.

"People are going to assume the worst about you, no matter what the truth is. I wish you and Drew well."

He paused, then winked. "Hell, I'm jealous. I told Kevin we could double the circulation of the Steelman alumni magazine by putting Drew Ohlen on the cover in his workout gear."

"So what did he say?" Drew asked that night, over dinner at the local Applebee's. Neither of us was much for cooking.

I sighed. "I can't say enough good things about Jon."

"So he's okay with it?"

I told him what the provost had said. Drew frowned.

"I wish Marcia wasn't doing my spring eval. She doesn't like me."

"I'll see to it she's fair, Drew. I'm still chair."

He shrugged. "If this means you're not going to dump me, I guess I can deal with it."

"Don't joke about that."

He grinned, unfazed. "You're so uptight. Guess we'll have to loosen you up some more."

He pressed his knee against mine under the table.

"When?" The word stuck in my dry throat. I saw the glint in his eye.

"Just as soon as you finish your vegetables, Glenny."

We went to Drew's tiny apartment that night, changing locales like fugitives. 

"I know it's not as nice as your place, but at least it's not next door to Elden Lewis," he said, emerging naked from the bathroom. Drew definitely was a bit of an exhibitionist. Then again, he could get away with it. Even in repose his cock was a prize specimen, matched by his heavy balls in their hair-brushed sack. I felt my own cock stiffening underneath the covers of his bed.

"You really don't like him, do you?"

"Does anybody?" Drew asked, climbing onto the bed in a graceful, panther-like move, muscles rippling in his back and shoulders. He lowered his head toward mine for a kiss. It was a moment before we resumed our conversation.

"How's his son doing in your World History Survey class this semester?"

He shook his head. "Not so hot. I'm telling you, Glenn, that's a gay boy."

I raised my eyebrows. "Really?"

"Really."

"Think Elden knows?"

He snorted. "Not likely. I wouldn't want to be his son when the truth comes out. Let's not talk about him anymore. It's spoiling the mood. What're you hiding underneath those covers anyway?" he said, flinging the blanket aside. He clicked his tongue. "Jesus. You still have your shorts on." "That's the way I sleep."

"Who said anything about sleeping?" In a flash my boxers were down to my thighs and Drew's head was in my crotch. I closed my eyes and sighed as my cock grew to full length in his expert mouth. Drew rolled his eyes as he finished stripping me and flung the shorts to the floor.

"We're going to have to get you different underwear. Screw this grandpa stuff," he said.

Tonight he got me on my knees with my head down, ass in the air, and took me from behind. I felt the thrusting power of his cock more intensely in this position, almost to the point of pain, grunting as he slammed into me, his swinging balls hitting mine on each downstroke.

Every time I reached for my cock he grabbed my hand and pulled it away. I wasn't going to concede. We collapsed into a wrestling match on the bed, panting and laughing, his cock still inside me.

"That does it," Drew said. He pulled out and disappeared below the edge of the bed. A minute later he reemerged, a look of mysterious triumph on his face, holding a lace from one of my school shoes.

"What are you doing?" I asked, still lying on my stomach, as he took hold of one of my wrists. "Oh no, you don't," I said, as I figured it out. I tried to wriggle away but his grip was iron.

"C'mon, Glenny. I promise you'll like it."

His voice was low and persuasive. I looked into his face, a small smile on his lips. His charm was as potent as it had been last night, when he had persuaded me to give up my ass to him.

I might have been his superior in everyday life, but right now my younger colleague was running the show. My mouth was dry as I said the words.

"Do it before I change my mind."

In another moment I was back where we had started, face on the pillow and butt in the air, my hands tied behind my back, unable to protect myself. To my amazement I was rock hard, my erection aching with need. Once again Drew was taking me to places I'd never been.

He applied fresh lube, working his finger into my sensitive places, stroking the head of my cock as he nudged my prostate. He got behind me again, letting me feel the blunt head of his penis bump against my hole, teasing me by withholding entry until I was begging him to fuck me. My incoherent words turned into a long wail as he suddenly sank all the way in, pressing his pubic bone against my butt.

His fucking this time was slow and deep, making me feel every inch of him as he pulled out and thrust into me again and again. His hands roved around the front of my body, pinching my nipples, stroking my cock almost to the point of shooting but never quite far enough, covering my mouth or thrusting fingers inside for me to lick.

His hot breath bathed the back of my neck, his teeth nipped at my earlobe, his tongue tickled me until I was helpless with laughter.

And there wasn't one thing I could do about any of it.

Finally Drew must have sensed I was reaching my limit. He withdrew, flipped me onto my back and took me into his mouth, thrusting two fingers into my stretched, sensitized hole, blowing me in long, hard strokes until I gave up my load with hoarse shouts of triumph, every drop of it going down his throat.

He pulled the rubber off and straddled my chest, pressing my pinioned arms painfully into the mattress while he stroked himself off, delivering his own spunk in hot splashes in my face. Not until then did he turn me onto my side and untie my hands.

I rolled slowly over onto my back, extending arms stiff from their long restraint, keeping my eyes closed, sticky fluid running down my face and neck.

"You okay, Glenn?"

I opened my eyes. Drew was kneeling beside me, a trace of anxiety in his eyes.

"Was I too rough?"

It was another moment before I could speak.

"Tying up and fucking the department chair. Every junior faculty member's fantasy."

He chuckled. "You're fine." He went into the bathroom, got a towel and cleaned me up before lying back down next to me. I turned and kissed him.

"Seriously, thanks. I'd never felt like that before."

Drew smiled. "At your service, Mr. Chairman. Besides, I'm getting my part of the deal too."

"What do you mean?"

"The ancient Greeks thought young scholars could acquire the wisdom of their elders by drinking their sperm. Where do you think the word 'seminar' comes from?"

I hooted. "Nice try, Dr. Ohlen."

Drew's eyes were dancing as usual. "Well, I believe it. And, Dr. Reynolds," he leered, "I intend to acquire as much wisdom as I can from my department chair."

In another time and place I might have enjoyed the look on Marcia's face when I asked her to take over the task of writing Drew's first-year evaluation, and told her why.

"Well," she finally said, "This is a surprise. I wouldn't have expected this of you." "What, wanting a little happiness in my life, Marcia? What's wrong with that?"

Her expression was sober. "I'll admit, I'm not a real big fan of Drew's. But I can't help wondering whether happiness is what you're going to get out of this." "I appreciate the concern. But maybe I'm old enough to make my own mistakes."

"If it were just about you that would be one thing. But like it or not, this concerns the department as well."

My voice was stiff. "Don't you think I've thought of that? That's why we're making this change. Anyway, whether this has a negative effect on the department depends mostly on your discretion. I'm assuming you're not going to start blabbing about this as soon as you get of here."

Her eyes snapped with anger. "Of course not." After a moment she sighed. "Sorry, I was out of line. I've no right to try and tell you how to run your life." A glint of humor appeared in her eye. "Is my not wanting to be chair a valid reason for hoping it doesn't work out?"

I laughed, the tension between us broken. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." Word got out about us, of course, despite Marcia's promise. People just know. For a while, though, it seemed like her worries were unfounded. I tried to treat Drew exactly as before at work, and thought I succeeded. After hours, of course, was another matter. I remember those next few weeks not only because of the hot, almost nightly sex Drew and I had, but because we were so happy.

Whether it was because I had conceded his dominant role in bed, or because I was no longer sitting in on his classes evaluating him, I don't know, but Drew's and my relationship changed, I think for the better. We still talked about his teaching, but informally, over lunch or after work. He showed me drafts of an article he was working on. I was flattered that he was even asking my opinion, and told him so.

"Why, Glenn? Did you think I was just saying that about your mind? I've read some of your stuff. It's damn good."

I was surprised and pleased, but tried not to let on. "You must've really done some digging. I haven't published anything for years. Not since I became chair."

He leaned forward, that familiar wicked glint in his eye. "So I did you a double favor by seducing you. You're going to give up being chair and go back to being a scholar, like you should."

I tried to parry. "Assuming you stick around here. I'm betting you take off as soon as that book you're working on comes out, and the glowing reviews pour in."

"Don't be so sure."

Of course, that was the one thing that kept me from abandoning myself to the joy of being with Drew. To his credit, he never made any promises, nor did I ask him for any. We enjoyed our time moment by moment.

I didn't even take the first signs of approaching disaster all that seriously.

One afternoon Drew stopped by during my office hour. One look at his face and I could tell something out of the ordinary had happened. 

"I saw Jon today."

"What's going on?"

He produced a one-page letter, written on University stationery. I skimmed through it. 

"Someone's filed a sexual harassment complaint against you."

"Well, I know that." It wasn't like him to snap at me, so I knew he was really worried. "This is bad, Glenn. What can I do about it?"

I tried to reassure him. "This is a notification the administration is required to give any time a Steelman faculty or staff member is named in this kind of complaint. It doesn't mean it's going to go anywhere."

"How I am I supposed to defend myself if I don't even know who made the accusation? The letter doesn't say."

He had me there. The thing about dealing with sexual harassment at Steelman was that the deck was stacked. Unless the alleged victim chose to so there was no obligation to inform the accused who the accuser was. There would be a hearing where a "Sexual Harassment Advisor," a designated member of the faculty or staff, would present the case. I had heard of a past case where a professor hadn't found out who had accused him until he walked into the hearing and saw the student sitting there. It was like an inquisition, and was loaded with potential to ruin a professional career, especially of a young faculty member like Drew.

Steelman was a small campus, though. It didn't take me long to find out who had pointed the finger. About a week later I was sitting in the cafeteria by myself, having a late lunch. Suddenly I became alert. Someone in a group of students at a table nearby had mentioned Drew's name. I was sitting with my back to them so they hadn't noticed that a faculty member was within earshot.

"You really think Ohlen did it?"

"He's such an arrogant prick. Sure. I could see him telling some girl he'd pass her for a blow job." "Dude, it's better than that. It's a guy. Well, sort of."

"No shit! Who?"

"Nathan Lewis."

"That little faggot?" Raucous laughter. "That's pathetic."

I picked up my tray and left. I'd heard enough.

"Nathan Lewis?" Drew was incredulous.

"Seems to be the rumor."

"But Glenn, he hardly talks to me. Sits in the back of the room. Never participates. Never comes in during my office hours. Turns his work in, more or less on time. Pretty marginal student on the whole, though he's passing." "Well," I said, "If you've had no contact with him, he has no case. I don't understand why he's doing this."

Drew looked thoughtful. "Maybe this has something to do with the notes I've been getting."

"What notes?"

He opened his desk drawer and brought out a stack of paper, held together with a clip. "I've been getting these in my campus mailbox this spring. One every week or so."

I took them and flipped through them. The lettering on the small, creased paper squares was laser-printed--the author hadn't wanted to be ID'd, for obvious reasons.

"Hot bod." "Stud prof." "Nice basket." Despite myself my lip curled upward. I stopped reading and handed them back.

"Someone has the hots for you, that's for sure. Not guilty. Though it's obviously a male." Drew rolled his eyes. "I didn't think it was you. But what if Nathan's doing this?" I nodded. "He has a crush on you and you haven't responded. The spurned lover takes revenge."

"Makes sense, doesn't it? Only what do we do about it?"

I shook my head. "Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"We don't have any proof Nathan wrote these. Your best hope is to wait for the hearing and tell the truth, that you've had little or no contact with him. They can't possibly find for him. And if the charges aren't upheld nothing will go on your record."

"That doesn't mean people won't find out they were made," Drew said, in a gloomy tone. "Obviously word has already gotten around."

"It sucks, I know. But the best way is to ignore them."

"Easier said than done."

"I'll go to Jon and ask him when he's going to convene the hearing. The sooner we get this behind us the better."

Drew sighed. "This whole thing has been such a distraction. I haven't been able to get any of my own work done lately. Of course," he brightened a bit, "There have been other distractions as well..."

I chuckled, glad to break the somber mood. "Now I'm guilty as charged."

"The poor guy. Nathan, I mean. I hope he gets some help, and soon."

Thinking back I shake my head at how naive we were. Now that we knew who it was things didn't seem so bad, especially since the accusation was ridiculous. A few weeks, some bureaucratic hassle and life would revert to normal. 

Instead, it got worse. Much worse.

On Monday morning a couple of weeks later I walked into the classroom building to teach my nine o'clock. As I approached my office I saw a couple of students I didn't recognize standing in front of it, pointing to something on my door. They saw me coming and turned tail, practically running down the hall. This was weird--Steelman students by and large were a friendly bunch.

A moment later I saw why they hadn't wanted to talk to me.

At least whoever did it hadn't defaced the door itself. They had attached the two squares of hot pink posterboard with duct tape. The block lettering on both was printed with indelible black marker. "FAG" said one. "OHLEN'S BITCH" read the other.

My knees felt rubbery and there was a roaring in my ears. As if in a dream I pulled at the hateful signs until they tore away from the wood. I wanted to fling them as far as I could, but instead I held them as I fumbled for my keys with a trembling hand. I'd need them as evidence.

Once I got inside and shut the door I dropped the signs behind my desk, out of sight, then stood, clutching at the wood as I took deep breaths, trying to calm down. 

Someone obviously didn't approve what was going on between Drew and me. But who?

At that moment there was a knock at my door. When I opened it there stood Drew. One look at his wide eyes and pale face and I knew what had happened.

"What did yours say?" I asked him.

"How did you know?" Drew said, his voice tight with anger. Silently I fished out the signs and showed them to him.

Drew snorted as he looked at them, but I could tell he was shaken. "Well," he said, "I had two myself. Orange. One said "QUEER BOY" and the other said "SUCKS GAY GLENN'S DICK." He shrugged. "Maybe they were supposed to form one complete sentence." His jaw set. "Nathan Lewis did this."

I wasn't so sure. "You really think so? He's accused you of sexual harassment. He's got to convince everyone's he sweet and innocent. Targeting you and me wouldn't be the smartest thing for him to do right now."

"Who else could it be?"

I shook my head. "I've never had any contact with Nathan Lewis. I've certainly never told him about my private life. There's no way he could have found out about us."




The Halls of Academe Ch. 03



Something in Drew's expression caught my eye. "What? What's wrong?"

He sat down on the battered couch in my office, not looking at me.

"Glenn, Nathan knows about us."

"How?"

"I--I guess I told him."

"You what?" It took a moment to comprehend what Drew had just said. Anger and disbelief hit me all at once. "I thought you said you'd never had any personal contact with him."

Drew looked off into space as he started to speak.

"It was a couple of weeks ago. Lately Nathan's been struggling. Been absent a lot. Failed the last essay exam I gave."

"If I were harassing a professor with false accusations I'd feel bad about it too." "Then out of the blue I get an e-mail from him. Wanted to see me about the test. I said sure--what else could I do?

"He comes to my office, sits down and starts talking. Says he'd been under a lot of stress about his personal life, et cetera. I thought maybe he was going to ask me for a makeup, or to give him an "A", in exchange for dropping the sexual harassment charge.

"All of a sudden he looks at me and says, 'I'm gay. And I'm in love with you.'"

Despite myself I was becoming engrossed in Drew's story. "My god. So he did write those notes."

Drew nodded. "Nothing like that ever happened to me before. I didn't know what to do. Then he started to cry. I don't think he was faking it, Glenn. He was really upset. I went over to him. Before I knew it his arms were around me. He was holding on to me like a drowning man. I hugged him back, I admit it. But I swear to you, nothing else happened."

"But I don't understand. How did he find out about us?"

Drew shifted uncomfortably, raising his hands in a tense gesture. "Well--I told him that I knew what he was going through. But that didn't mean I was in love with him or that we could ever have a relationship. 

"He looked at me and said, you have someone already, don't you? I didn't see any reason not to tell him the truth so I said yes. He didn't miss a beat, he said, it's Dr. Reynolds, isn't it? I was so shocked, I couldn't say anything. He must have figured out he was right from my reaction."

"Jesus." This was getting worse and worse. "How did he know?"

Drew went on as if he hadn't heard. "I tried to change the subject, told him he needed to talk to Counseling Services, maybe join the gay students' organization here on campus. He said he couldn't do that, his father would find out. Figures that he's not out to Elden.

He looked stricken. "I thought he was all right with everything when he left. I really thought I had convinced him to stop all this nonsense. Now this. I can't believe it."

He struck himself on the forehead. "What the fuck are we going to do, Glenn? How can we show our faces around here after what's happened?" I spoke with a confidence I didn't really feel. "The more normal we act the sooner people are going to forget this. Not that many people saw the signs anyway." Drew refused to be encouraged. "It'll be all around campus by lunch time."

"So what? We've done nothing wrong. Being gay isn't illegal in Texas anymore."

"Easy for you to say. You're tenured. You'll still have a job after this year." I gripped his shoulder. "And so will you. I'm going to talk to Jon as soon as I can get in his office today. Better he hear it from us first. Oh, god." I had looked at my desk clock. "I can't believe I have to teach now."

I gathered my materials and forced myself down the hall to the classroom. Once I got started it was okay, though I had my moments. I was sure every whispering pair of students in the back of the room was talking about how the gay professor just got outed. I imagined sympathy in the eyes of others who I knew liked me.

Bad news travels fast. My heart sank when I entered the Provost's office that afternoon and saw the grave expression on Jon's face.

"All I can say, Jon, is that we've done nothing to warrant this kind of treatment." "Hate speech and harassment have no place on this campus, I agree." Jon shook his head. "Still, I think Drew was unwise to volunteer so much personal information to a student. Or touch him in a manner that suggested any sort of physical attraction, especially when the student had already accused him of harassment."

"He was only trying to help." My fist pounded the arm of the chair I was sitting in. "What kind of world is it when we can't even comfort a student in distress?"

He raised his brow. "In this case it seems to have had the opposite effect." Jon seemed to realize how harsh his words sounded. He reached across the conference table and touched my arm. "I know this is frustrating, Glenn. But other than ask the campus police to investigate there's not much we can do in the short term.

"At Drew's hearing we can certainly ask Nathan about this other incident, if the evidence implicates him. If it turns out he put up those signs, there are severe penalties for that kind of behavior, even if his own charges are upheld. That's the best we can do for now."

More bad news was in store when I got back to my office. Marcia Hannon was waiting to see me. 

"I heard about what happened to you all," she said. "That sucks. I can't believe any of our students would do a thing like that."

"Well, one--or maybe more than one--did."

"Listen, Glenn, I hate to bring this up, but first-year faculty evaluations are due soon. I'm going to have to mention this sexual harassment thing."

I was stunned. "How did you know about that?"

Marcia sighed. "I know I'm not supposed to know. Jon Evans probably figured since I'm doing Drew's evaluation, I needed all the information."

"He told you?"

She nodded. "It does speak to Drew's effectiveness as a teacher."

"I fucking can't believe it." Had the whole world turned against us?

"Glenn, forgive me, but you might not be seeing this with a totally objective eye." I began to get mad. "Marcia, just because I'm fucking Drew doesn't mean I can't see when someone's about to get smeared."

She was offended. "I'm not going to smear him. And there's no need to be crude about it."

"Have the charges against him been proven?"

"Well, no."

"When the Provost has the hearing and Drew's found guilty of sexual harassment, then you can put that in his eval. IF he's found guilty."

"But what if it doesn't take place until after the evaluation's due?"

I had to end this before I lost my temper. "Jon Evans, of all people, should understand why an evaluation might be late in a situation like this. Marsh, I can't stop you from writing anything you want, but promise me--as a friend--you'll hold off until I've talked to him. Please."

She looked unconvinced, but said, "Okay."

Fifteen minutes later I was in my car, headed out of campus. I had to get out of what had become an alien and hostile place. I was furious at Jon, and I didn't even want to see Drew. Had I ruined my career--and his--for nothing more than a workplace fling? Voices were starting to whisper in my head and I didn't like it.

I drove southward toward the city. It was a gorgeous spring day, an ironic contrast to the turmoil I was feeling inside. I don't recall consciously deciding where to go, but in a short while I found myself pulling into the dirt parking lot of a small city park. It was a greenbelt surrounding a creek that somehow still ran mostly clear and sparkling through what had recently been a rural region north of the city.

On this weekday afternoon there were only one or two cars in the parking lot. Though I'd come here to be by myself, I still felt an unexplainable disappointment. I got out and headed up the trail running alongside the creek.

It was a long walk that soon became taxing, as the woods thickened and the smooth dirt path narrowed and clambered over rocky ridges that began to rise from the ground. After a while I was puffing with exertion. Sweat dripped down my brow and soaked the back of my dress shirt.

I was so engrossed in keeping my footing on the bumpy trail I didn't notice the man coming toward me until I almost ran into him.

"Oh, sorry," I said, startled.

"No problem," he replied. He was better dressed for the trail than I was, in faded jeans, work boots and a battered T-shirt. His blue eyes were vivid in his tanned, weather-beaten face, his chin grizzled with gray stubble, the same color as his untidy hair. He grinned, showing a gap where he had lost several front teeth. Otherwise he might have been good-looking.

He didn't move to let me pass, and a faint uneasiness rose in me. To cover it I said a bit too loudly, "Good day for a hike."

He nodded, still with that grin on his face, his eyes not leaving me. I stepped past him on the narrow trail, brushing against his body, catching a whiff of his strong, unwashed scent, sweat mingled with stale tobacco and alcohol.

I began to walk fast, stumbling a bit on the uneven terrain, conscious that no one else was in sight and hoping the stranger wasn't following me. I'd gone only a short way when I couldn't stand the suspense and stopped, forcing myself to turn and look back.

The man was still standing in the same spot. His back was turned, and he was looking over his shoulder at me. He caught my eye, and his body shifted.

One rough hand went to the crotch of his jeans.

I stood as if rooted to the ground, my pulse pounding in my ears. In a flash I knew why I had come to this place.

The man's hand moved, caressing himself. He nodded, flashing his gap-toothed grin again.

My feet moved of their own accord, back down the path toward him. As I approached he left the path and walked into the woods, away from the creek.

When I got to the spot where he had disappeared there was a faint side trail winding between the trees, through the tangled undergrowth. I saw his retreating form some distance away. Without conscious thought I struck out after him. My breathing was fast and shallow, my mouth dry, my cock hard and painful against the front of my pants.

By a tall tree he turned, facing me, and dropped to his knees. His mouth opened. His tongue shot out in a lewd, unmistakable signal.

I reached him, panting. His hand stroked my bulge.

"Want some head?"

I nodded, fumbling with my zipper. My hands were shaking and it took a minute, but at last I stood, exposed in the woods, totally at this stranger's mercy. What if he were a psycho? I saw the gleaming lust in his eyes and discarded the thought.

"Nice cock, man."

Strong hands grabbed my ass. Hot, wet, silky pleasure engulfed my erection. I gasped, turning my unseeing eyes up to the sky. I grabbed his shoulders, running a hand through his greasy hair.

The stranger sucked me with abandon, sliding back and forth on my rod, spit dripping out of the corners of his mouth and onto the dirt beneath in long, viscous strings. The obscene slurping noises he was making turned me on even further. I felt the climax rise up in me and pulled back, not wanting to end it yet.

"What's the matter, buddy?" he asked.

"Uh...I don't want to cum in your mouth."

He shook his head, his missing front teeth making his grin maniacal. "You got to. Love to swallow. Let me taste it."

A groan escaped me as he flicked his tongue rapidly over the sensitive head. He chuckled before engulfing me again down to the root, burying his nose in my pubes. There was no holding back. My hips began to thrust of their own accord and in a few seconds my aching balls emptied, delivering blasts of hot liquid through my exploding organ into his eager mouth. I heard my cocksucker choking and gulping. My knees buckled and my body jackknifed as I fought to keep from collapsing, ragged gasps emerging from my mouth, almost choking myself trying to keep quiet. 

Finally I regained control. My cock was painful in the aftermath of orgasm and the feel of the stranger's mouth was unbearable. Panting, I pulled out, still dribbling. A shudder went through me as his tongue claimed one of the drops.

The man stroked my leg. "Thanks, buddy," he said, his voice hoarse, his eyes watery. "Tasted great."

Guilt and panic struck at the same time. What the hell was I doing out here? I stuffed myself back in and zipped up as fast as I could, trying not to look at the stains on my pants.

"Got to go," I said to the unknown man, then turned tail and ran back down the trail, thinking only of getting away. I stumbled over the rocks, almost falling a couple of times, but didn't stop until I was back in my car. Sweat poured off of me as I backed up and headed onto the paved road that led out of the park.

Back home I stripped, threw my clothes in the wash and jumped in the shower, trying to wash away all trace of what I'd done. It wasn't until gallons of hot water and soap had coursed over my body that I began to feel better. The tight knot that had been in my stomach all day gradually disappeared and numbness and exhaustion took its place.

I got out, dried myself, switched off the phone in my bedroom and got under the covers.

Much later I awoke. It took me a moment in my groggy state to realize what I'd heard. Far away there was a heavy thudding. Someone was pounding on my front door 

"Glenn? Are you in there?" It was Drew's voice.

My eyes went to the bedside clock, glowing in the now dark room. It was quarter to eight. I'd slept for nearly four hours.

"Oh, shit." I struggled out of bed, my limbs still leaden with fatigue, my head pounding. I heard Drew hit the wood again and called, "Coming!" as I finally found a pair of boxers.

"Jesus Christ," Drew said. No sooner had I got the door open than he had swarmed in and gathered me into his arms. "Where the hell have you been? I was so worried."

"Asleep."

"I waited in your office for ages. Thought you had just stepped out."

"In my office?"

"Yeah." His eyes searched my face. "Your door was wide open when I came by around three."

I shook my head. "I must have forgotten to shut it. Guess I was kind of out of it."

"After I'd waited half an hour I got worried. No one had seen you since lunch. Your car wasn't in the parking lot, and I couldn't get you on your cell phone."

"Sorry. I just needed to get away."

"I don't blame you. It's been an awful day, hasn't it?" Drew said, as he walked me to the living room couch.

"You don't know the half of it." Guilt was stirring in me. "I tried to do some damage control, but it's like shoveling quicksand."

"You know, the students were great. A couple of them even came up after my afternoon seminar and said what a rotten thing they thought had happened to me." His face darkened. "I hope I can control myself when I see that asshole tomorrow in World History. Fuck this nurturing shit. I'd like to punch his smug little face in."

"Don't let on that you're upset. Besides, we still don't know for sure he had anything to do with this." "I suppose you're right. Anyway, I wouldn't give the bastard the satisfaction." Drew got up from the couch. "You must be hungry. What did you do this afternoon? Not sleep for eight hours, I hope."

"I--" The lie I was about to utter stuck in my throat. "I did a fucking dumb thing."

Drew smiled. "Naw--not you. What?"

There was no good way to say it so I didn't even try. When I finished my two-sentence report there was silence. I stared at the floor.

"Well," Drew said.

Words came from me in a rush. "Back when I first moved here, after I'd gotten kicked out of that school in Oklahoma, I was so lost. I went cruising in that park all the time. It was a way to numb the pain, Drew--like drinking or dope. Today I caved in under the pressure. Fell off the wagon. It's the only way I can explain it." Desperation made my voice harsh. "I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

He said nothing.

"Don't you believe me?"

He shrugged. "Yeah."

Then he walked away from me, toward the door. In that instant I felt the chill of despair. I had lost him again, and had only myself to blame. 

"Drew!"

He turned, his eyes somber. "I'll have to think about this a while. Alone. I'll see you around school, okay?"

The thud of the front door closing was like a falling guillotine.

TO BE CONTINUED



The Halls of Academe Ch. 04



Revised version copyright 2006 by the author. 

*

The days after I was fired from my teaching job in Oklahoma were the darkest I'd had in my life up until now. They were nothing compared to the despair of that night Drew walked out on me.

I felt like a boulder was pressing on my chest as I stared at the ceiling of my dark bedroom. I didn't cry.

Exhaustion must have caught up with me. The next thing I knew I was waking to the familiar beep of my bedside alarm clock. The light filtering into the room was gray and faint--it was overcast out and probably going to rain.

I dragged myself out of bed and made myself presentable enough to go to work, at least on the outside. Holding my umbrella, I began walking toward campus. I dreaded the thought of seeing Drew, but there was no point in trying to avoid it. If we were really finished I'd have to get used to the fact.

Luck, if you could call it that, was with me that morning. I taught my class, saw a couple of students who were working with me individually, and walked to the library to return a book, all without catching sight of him.

Lunchtime, though, loomed ahead. We usually ate together, Drew coming to get me in my office about a quarter after noon, to avoid the rush of students in the cafeteria line who had just gotten out of their eleven o'clock classes. I was sure that wasn't going to happen today.

I'd kept busy enough all morning that I'd managed not to think of him, but now my spirits descended into gloom again. As noon rolled around I tried to work, but soon gave up. I sat at my desk, trying to muster the energy either to go home for lunch or somewhere else.

I'd just stood and started looking for my umbrella when I heard a knock. I wheeled toward my office door.

"Hey," Drew said. He didn't smile.

I swallowed, then managed to say, "I didn't think you were coming."

He scratched his head. "Can I come in?"

I nodded.

He shut the door behind him and sat on the couch. I wanted so much to go to him. Instead I went back and sat on my desk, across the room.

A moment of silence, then Drew said, "I didn't get much sleep last night." "You and me both."

"Guess I had a lot on my mind."

I found myself getting impatient. Why didn't he just say it and get it over with? 

"Well," I said, "You know Marsha's still going to have to do your eval."

He stared. "What?"

"After all, why would you want your ex-boyfriend evaluating you? I'd have even more reason not to be objective."

Sudden anger flashed in his eyes. "Don't talk like that."

I tried to keep my voice harsh. "Isn't that why you came? To tell me we were through?" My voice cracked on the last word and I felt a burning flush creeping up my neck and face.

He sighed, not looking at me. "I thought about it." Then he raised his head and looked into my eyes. "But then I realized--I didn't want to lose you."

My chest heaved. I looked at the floor so he wouldn't see the tears that had sprung to my eyes.

"Drew, I'm so sorry."

Drew said, "I can understand if you want someone else once in a while. Just tell me about it first, okay? And you've got to give me some space too." He smiled, for the first time since he had come in. "Not that I need it."

I stared. "You don't?"

He shook his head. "I haven't wanted anyone else since the first time I met you."

I lost it then. We never did make it to lunch.

"Glenn," Drew said a while later. We were both sitting on the couch. My head was on his shoulder as he cradled me in his arms. The rain pattered softly on the roof above us. "They want to break us up."

I nodded and looked into his eyes, managing a smile. "Let them try. We'll win in the end." "You think so?"

I said, with more confidence than I felt, "They've got to realize there's no truth to his ridiculous story." Drew shook his head. "That's not going to be enough to save us." His hands cupped my face and his blue gaze filled my vision. "You were right. I never should have given that kid the time of day. I got you into this mess because of my own lack of judgment. That's what's tearing me up, Glenn--I'm taking you down with me."

"No one's going down. Don't talk like that."

His face stayed grave. "It's going to get worse before it gets better."

"I can face anything, as long as it's with you." Now it was his eyes that filled. "Thank you, Glenn."

That night I said to him as we embraced in my bed, "Punish me."

Drew raised his head, surprised. "Why?"

"I wronged you. I should pay."

"What--" A glint appeared in his eye. "Maybe you're right. You should be punished. Severely."

I nodded, my breath quickening. "Yes, sir."

Drew thought for a moment, then a smile spread across his face. He rose and stood by the bed. My mouth watered at the sight of his erect cock. I wanted it so bad. 

He stretched out his hand, pulling me off the bed as I took it.

"Wait."

I obeyed, standing passive as he rummaged in my closet and came back with a handful of my neckties. He took one and bound my hands behind my back. When he was done he stood in front of me and examined his handiwork. My cock rose under his smoldering gaze. 

"Very nice." He took hold of my erection and stroked it gently, sending shivers of pleasure through me. The next moment I jumped, startled, as he flicked the head with his forefinger and thumb, hard enough to sting. Drew chuckled. I cried out as he reached out and tweaked both my nipples. My heart was pounding, my breath quick and shallow.

He picked up the other neckties from the floor where he had let them fall, then took hold of one of my elbows and led me through the house to the kitchen. When we got there, he pulled a chair out from under the table.

"Sit."

I obeyed. Drew took the rest of the neckties. In a few moments he had me tied to the chair.

He looked at me, frowning. "Think we need one more thing. Don't go away." With a teasing wink he left me. In a few moments I heard him returning. He reemerged holding a bright yellow length of braided nylon. I recognized the strap I put around my suitcase when I traveled by air. How did he know I had that thing?

In a moment I saw what he had in mind. He threaded the strap under my arms, around my waist, and pulled it tight as he snapped the plastic buckle shut. Now I really couldn't move. If I struggled too hard I'd fall over. This was way beyond the mild bondage we had tried before. I could hardly contain my excitement.

He stood before me, hands on his hips, a small smile playing across his face. 

"How'd you like to teach your class tomorrow like that?"

I spoke through dry lips. "Anything for you, sir."

He stepped forward until his erect cock loomed before me. I bent forward, straining to take it in my mouth, but he kept just out of reach. I extended my tongue as far as I could, a small moan escaping my throat. Drew laughed softly.

"You want it, don't you?"

"Please."

"No." Drew's voice was soft, implacable. He took hold of his rod and began to slap it across my face, smearing my cheeks with his precum, still not letting me have it the way I wanted. Then he bent and gave me a long, wet tongue kiss, holding my head hard, pressing against me until it hurt and I was emitting muffled sounds of protest. 

He let go with a smack. I threw my head back, dizzy with lust and frustration. "Oh fuck," I gasped.

He grinned at me. "The night is young."

When Drew finally let me have him minutes later it was on his own terms. I gagged, his musky pubic hair tickling my nostrils, as he thrust his tool down my throat and held it there till I was faint from lack of oxygen. When he released me this time I drew great heaving breaths, tears running down my cheeks, but before I could recover his mouth was on mine again. I felt my chest swell as he forced his air into my lungs. We passed our breath back and forth.

"Had enough?" he said when he broke away.

I couldn't speak, but managed to shake my head. Drew smiled. "You're tougher than I thought." His eyes darkened with desire. "So fucking hot, seeing you naked and helpless. Makes me want to just jack off right here in front of you."

"No!" The thought of him pleasuring himself while I could do nothing but watch drove me crazy.

He chuckled. "I didn't think you'd like that idea." Suddenly he knelt in front of me. I cried out as he swallowed my cock and began to slide up and down on it in long strokes, spit running out of his mouth, coating the shaft and wetting my balls. Just as I felt my climax approaching he stopped. 

"Damn you!"

Drew shook his finger playfully in my face. "Temper." He grabbed my shoulders as he spread his legs and straddled my lap. I felt his hand grab my slick shaft. I saw his thigh muscles bulge as he bent his legs, then in a flash it happened--his full weight was pressing on my lap and squeezing, enveloping warmth surrounded my cock. Drew had speared himself on me, the last thing I'd expected.

Our cries were simultaneous, mine from surprise, his no doubt from pain. I looked into his face and saw his features twisted into a grimace, his eyes screwed shut, as his body tried to deal with the sudden invasion of his innards. Then they opened and he saw me looking at him. Drew smiled. He knew he had gotten me but good, and it was worth the hurt.

"How're you doing?" "You're fucking unbelievable," was all I could manage. He stared into space, his features relaxing as his body adjusted to me. Finally he looked at me and smiled again.

"Try and fuck me."

Very quickly I realized why he'd used the luggage strap. My butt was pinned to the chair and I couldn't thrust upward. I struggled harder as Drew chuckled. I felt him begin to move, squeezing my rod with his ass muscles as he slowly raised himself, until only the head of my cock was inside him. He flexed his ring, milking and working the sensitive flesh until my breath grew ragged. Just when I couldn't take anymore he let himself fall back on my lap, relaxing his hole so that my tool surged through him in a huge thrust.

"Oh my god!"

I don't know how long it lasted, but it seemed like forever. Drew used his powerful leg and thigh muscles and his talented ass to take my helpless body, slowly, thoroughly, drawing out each down and upstroke on my aching erection until I saw stars. Knowing that I was inside him bareback only added to the excitement. Every now and then he'd take a breather to kiss me or tease my nipples with his tongue.

After a while both of us were coated with a sheen of sweat. I was shaking, incoherent, half laughing, half crying as I begged for release. Drew's response to every plea was a smile and shake of his tousled head. At last he took pity on me.

"Had enough?"

Before I could answer his body swung into action. The chair squeaked in protest as Drew rode my cock with powerful thrusts. It only took a few seconds for the cum that had built up in my balls to come boiling up and out of my cock buried in his ass. I threw my head back and roared with delight as spurt after spurt of hot cream surged into him. Drew laughed with satisfaction.

"Uh-huh, give it to me."

He slowed his movements but kept his hands on my shoulders, asshole clamped on my cock as he milked the last of my load out of me. Finally one hand went to his erection.

"You're so fucking hot, Glenn," he muttered as he jacked himself with quick hard strokes, leaning back and grinding his hips, working his prostate with my still hard tool. His breath whistled through his clenched teeth, strangled grunts rose from his throat as jets of spunk shot out of his purplish engorged head, hitting my face, chin and chest. He fell against me then, his breath cool against my sweating skin.

We stayed in that position for a long time, captor and captive. At last Drew stirred. Gingerly he raised himself off of me, letting out a small noise as my cock popped out of him. He stretched, took a few stiff steps and smiled.

"Really gave my legs a workout. I'd better untie you."

A minute later I was free. I tested my own limbs, then tried to rise. My legs wobbled and Drew caught one of my elbows. Small tremors shook my thighs. I'd exhausted myself straining against my bonds.

"I'll help you."

He kept one arm around me as we walked slowly back to the bedroom. When we got there, he said, "I'll get a towel and clean you up."

"No," I said. Drew looked at me, surprised.

"I want to wear your cum to bed." Most of it had dried. "You marked me with it."

When we got in bed he kissed me. "I have your load up my ass, don't forget. You've marked me too."

I looked into his eyes. "I want yours up mine. No more rubbers."

His teeth flashed in the grin that had captivated me from the first time I saw him. "Okay, but I'm going to have to recharge my batteries first." He winked. "You do look good wearing my juice." The next morning I woke earlier than usual, around seven-thirty. Drew lay asleep, his breathing still deep and even. When I got out of bed I winced--my body hadn't quite recovered from being trussed up the night before.

Under the hot shower I began to feel better. I washed the evidence of last night's play off my skin. My cock rose as I relived the memories.

When I came out and began getting dressed Drew stirred in the bed.

"Why're you up so early?" he murmured, his eyes still shut.

"I've got to run an errand at the main administration building before I teach."

Drew opened his eyes with an effort, yawned and smiled. "The life of a department chair. Don't go."

"Have to," I said, my jaw set as I knotted my tie. It probably wasn't going to be an altogether pleasant trip. With an effort I shook off my grim mood and walked over to the bed. I leaned down and kissed him. "See you later. Stay in bed as long as you like."

"Nah, I should go home and change. Keep up the pretense that we live in separate establishments." Drew threw back the covers and sat up. I hugged him and managed to turn away.

"Make yourself some coffee. I'll see you for lunch," I said, as I walked out.

The rain of yesterday had passed, and the day promised to be sunny. My strides were quick and purposeful as I headed toward the Provost's office.

Jon's secretary hadn't come in yet when I got there. I'd planned it this way. I knew he often came early to get work done and this was a good time to catch him. Sure enough, his office door was open. I knocked. 

"Come in," he called. He looked a bit surprised to see me. Maybe also apprehensive? If so, he was reading me right.

"Glenn, hello. You're up early."

"I need to talk to you," I said. I felt my heart beat faster and willed myself not to lose control.

"What can I do for you?"

"That was a rotten and unfair thing you did to Drew."

He blinked, then sighed. He knew what I was talking about. "I know you're angry, Glenn."

"Damn right I am. Disappointed too. You've turned into a true administrator." That provoked a flicker of annoyance. "I'm not sure that's fair."

I wasn't going to give him anything. "You didn't have to tell Marcia about Drew's sexual harassment accusation. Especially since nothing, absolutely nothing's been proved."

"As Drew's de facto chair she should know what's going on."

"Maybe. She probably would have found out anyway, especially after what happened to us a couple of days ago. But telling her she could put it in his evaluation is unbelievable, Jon. I really thought you were better than that."

No response. Jon's gaze was directed away from me, at a point on the wall of his office. With an effort I hung on to my temper. Losing it wouldn't help Drew. Besides, a part of me still thought of the Provost as a friend. "The least you can do now is to ask her to postpone filing his eval until the hearing is held and a finding is made. Otherwise he'll have this accusation on his record forever."

More silence. When Jon finally looked at me his eyes gave nothing away. "I'll think about it, Glenn."

Anger rose again. "I hope you do. You of all people should know what unfounded rumor can do to a career." Without waiting for an answer I walked out of his office. In the corridor outside I leaned against the wall and took a deep breath. There went the department budget increase I'd requested, but I'd done what I had to do.

It turned out to be one of those mornings when I was reminded how little teaching had to do with my job. First there was the colleague, telling me that the next guest speaker on our lecture series was wondering whether we could increase his fee. Then there was the student who wanted to withdraw from her upper-level Chaucer course though it was past the deadline. That wouldn't have been a problem, except she didn't want it to show on her transcript that she was WF--withdrawing failing.

In between all the meetings and e-mails I did run out for an hour and teach a class, as I remember.

Drew stopped by my office just before noon. He had a paper bag in his hand.

"I got a couple of sandwiches from that place you like downtown. Thought we could eat here."

"Good idea."

We munched on sandwiches and chips, washed down with soda. I suppose we might have been cowards for not eating together in the cafeteria. Somebody on campus had let us know in no uncertain terms that our relationship did not meet with their approval. I'd get over it eventually, but I didn't feel like facing more brickbats today.

I told Drew about my conversation with the Provost. "I don't know if it did any good." "Well, I appreciate you trying, Glenny." Drew drained the last of his Diet Coke. "Too bad about Jon. I thought he was on our side."

"Knowing Jon," I said, "He probably did it from some misguided idea of treating everyone alike. He's scared Elden Lewis or some other right-winger on the faculty will say he's coddling his queer buddies."

"You're probably right. Well, I'm going back to work." Drew gave me a hug and rose. "See you tonight?"

"For sure."

Drew smiled. "Good. Because I owe you something."

For a minute I was puzzled, then I smiled back. "Yes you do. And you won't have to tie me down to pay me back."

He left. I sat at my desk and tried to hold on to the good feeling our time together had given me. Not five minutes passed before there was a knock.

"Glenn?"

"Hello, Phil," I said, a bit surprised. I hadn't seen Philip Ramsey for a long time. The Art Department had moved out of the Humanities Division a few years back when they got their own state-of-the-art facility on the other side of campus. Even though Steelman was a small campus, it was remarkable how not working in the same space cut down how often you saw someone.

Philip and I had never been close anyway. Before he came out he had been married and had kids. I guess it's hard to get over the urge to hide even when it doesn't matter anymore. I would have liked to have known him better, at least until Drew had come along. Even nearing sixty Phil was a hunky fellow, tall and broad-shouldered with a full head of silver hair, looking pretty damn good in his jeans and work boots.

"Come on in. What's up?"

Phil seemed aware that his visit was a bit unusual. He scratched his head and shifted on his feet.

"I hope I'm not catching you at a bad time."

"No, not at all."

His eyes met mine. "Glenn, it's shameful what happened to you."

I shrugged with a casualness I didn't feel. "Oh, well. Kids."

"If it was a joke, it was in damn poor taste. I hope they catch whoever did it and give 'em hell." His voice was vehement. I could imagine that for Phil Ramsey there'd be nothing worse than being publicly outed.

"Thanks, Phil. I appreciate it."

"Anyway, I thought of something that might help. Catch the asshole, I mean."

My interest perked up. "Really, what?"

"Well," Philip said, "I heard about the signs, how they used fluorescent posterboard."

"Orange and hot pink. Attention-getting colors, eh?" I said, wryly. "Seems to have worked."




The Halls of Academe Ch. 04



That seemed to get Philip excited. "Exactly. Those were the colors, all right."

"What are you talking about, Phil?"

He sat on my couch. "The department orders posterboard for matte work, architectural models, couple of other things. We don't usually use colors like that, of course. About a year or so ago, though, some drawing major wanted to frame her work in freaky colors for her senior show. She ordered tons of it and charged it to the department, way more than she needed. We were stuck with about a dozen sheets of the stuff."

"So the Art Department owns the same posterboard that was used for the signs, is that what you're saying?"

Philip shook his head. "I didn't care, but some of my snobbier colleagues were not going to have that shit lying around." He shrugged. "So we voted to donate it to the Student Activities Office. It made sense, actually. Some organization or club could use it to make eye-catching signs." His grimace was eloquent. "This isn't quite what we had in mind."

I thought for a moment. "There must be dozens of registered student organizations and clubs on campus. Doesn't narrow it down a great deal."

"No, except--" Phil leaned forward and lowered his voice. "How many student organizations are into outing people?"

I was stunned. "What?

He nodded. "You might not know that LEGAL, the Steelman gay and lesbian student organization, recently voted to endorse the concept. There are some loose cannons in that bunch."

"But--" I was still groping for answers. "It's true that I'm not exactly a poster child for gay liberation. But I've never hidden who I am. And I've never used my closeted power to oppress gays on this campus--unless you count flunking people who deserve it as oppression. According to the statistics, ten percent of everybody I've flunked has got to be gay."

Philip smiled. "You do have the reputation of being a hardnose, Glenn. Still, though, have either you or Drew ever made someone in LEGAL mad? Might be worth looking into."

Drew, though, was skeptical when I told him what Philip had said.

"Glenn, I know some of the students in LEGAL. Sure, they're intense, but they're not mean. And this was mean."

We were at his place, getting ready for bed.

"Well, maybe you're right. Still, it's the best lead we have so far." I wanted to wrap this up, because Drew was flopped naked on his bed, hands behind his head, and the sight of him was making it hard for me to think straight.

"When are you coming to bed?" he demanded. He looked at me and snickered. "My god, you still have your pants on."

"Take them off of me, then, if you're so impatient." I moved toward him. Drew had a little surprise in store for him. I hoped he'd like it. 

He unbuckled my belt and unzipped my fly. I saw his eyes widen. He looked up and grinned. "Aw, you."

I was wearing my swimmer strap. After my workout at the pool that afternoon I'd put on another, dry one instead of my usual underwear.

"You sure know how to cheer a guy up," Drew said, sitting up and putting his mouth on the full pouch. He worked on it until the head of my dick poked up past the waistband.

My pants came off pretty fast after that, but Drew made me keep the jock on for quite a while, until the pouch was soaked with his spit and my precum. He tugged on the straps as he ate out my ass from behind, my head buried in the pillows. Then he flipped me onto my back and peeled the thing off. He took the lube from the table beside the bed. His eyes locked onto mine as he applied it to his unsheathed cock with slow, twisting strokes until the shaft and head glistened in the dim light.

"Just so you know, I'm clean," I told him.

He smiled. "I knew that last night."

His cock slid in without any pain. We gasped in unison. "Sweet Jesus, that feels incredible," he said.

His motions were slow and tender, as much from his not wanting to cum too fast as wanting to tease me. My arms were free to wrap around his broad back and shoulders. My hands felt his rock-hard butt muscles contract on each thrust.

I took hold of his face and drew his lips to mine. As we kissed Drew finally lost control and began to drill me. I clamped my ass muscles tight around his raging shaft, trying to squeeze the prize out. He broke away and shouted, "Take it, fucker!" as he plunged in and held his pulsing tool as far in me as he could. I felt his cum flood into me for the first time. That was all it took to send me over the edge. Without my ever having touched it my own cock shot white spurts across my stomach and chest as I gasped and tossed my head from side to side.

Afterward we lay in each other's arms. I felt a peace inside and a bond with Drew even stronger than what I'd felt up until now. I'd never cheat on him again.

"I've been thinking," he said. "It's been getting warm lately. Spring is really here." I nodded.

"How about going to the lake this weekend? We haven't been there since last fall."

My heart leaped at the thought, but my head worried. "Are you sure that's a good idea?

"Why wouldn't it be?"

I tried to think of a reason, but Drew supplied it for me. "Because we'd be, what, flaunting our relationship by appearing naked together in public? It's not illegal out there."

"Still--"

"Who's going to see us? Elden? Jon? Not likely." He looked into my eyes with that intent expression. "Glenn, you're the one who said they were trying to break us up. Why should we let them--whoever they are--keep us from doing what we want to do? Don't misunderstand me," he said, smirking, "I'm not going to fuck you at the lake. That would be hot, but I'm not that stupid." "Aw," I groaned in mock disappointment, then smiled. "Okay. Better make sure we have sunscreen."

Saturday dawned bright and sunny, a perfect day for a lake trip. We got an early start, and the parking lot had only a few cars in it when we arrived. My spirits began to lift as we walked along the paved path above the jagged limestone outcroppings that led to the water.

Drew turned to me. "How about here?" We left the path and picked our way down the rocks to the edge of the water. We found a flat ledge in the sun, spread out our towels and peeled off our clothes.

Despite the fact that being naked together was usually a cue for rampant, wanton bodily contact, today we both felt content to lie next to one another, not touching. There was something peaceful and innocent about sunbathing outdoors when it was still winter according to the calendar.

After a while Drew reached over and grasped my hand. I turned and smiled at him. For the moment all our trials seemed very far away. 

"This is nice, isn't it?"

"Mm hmm. If only we could stay here forever," Drew said. "To hell with that damn place."

He rose and stretched. "I'm going in."

I turned and watched as he slipped into the water and dove under. In a moment he broke the surface, gasping and whooping.

"Jesus, it's cold."

I shivered. "Brrr. I think I'll soak up some more sun."

Drew grinned. "You're such a wuss." He dove under and began to swim out into open water. I watched him go until he was a long distance away, his powerful arms still stroking. He seemed small and vulnerable against the wide expanse of blue water, and a lump rose in my throat. I thought about the first time we had come here last fall, soon after he had arrived at Steelman. So much had happened since then, good and bad.

He turned and began to swim back in. When he was about halfway back I clambered to the edge of the rock. Even though I tried to slip in gradually the icy water still made me gasp. I stroked as hard as I could toward him. Drew saw me and started to tread water. By the time I reached him my heart was thudding with the cold and exertion.

"Isn't it great?" he said, his hair plastered to his head.

I reached out with both arms and hung on to his shoulders. "Being anywhere with you is great."

He kissed me, his breath warm on my cold face, then turned onto his back. "Is this a gorgeous day or what? It might as well be spring already. Look how green it is up there," Drew said, gazing toward the shore.

The next moment a cascade of water hit me in the face, blinding me. "What--"

Drew had bolted upright, his eyes locked on a point in the woody hillside above the rocky ledge where we had laid our clothes.

"He's up there."

"Who?" I didn't get an answer. Drew had begun swimming vigorously toward shore. Puzzled and scared, I stroked after him, barely keeping up.

We got back to our spot and pulled ourselves out of the water. I sat on the edge of the rock, winded, but Drew, without pausing, began to pull his shoes on.

"I'm going up there and find him."

"Who?" I asked again, raising my voice in frustration.

Drew looked at me as if seeing me for the first time. "Nathan. Nathan Lewis."

"What?" I said, thunderstruck, but Drew was already clambering up the rocks toward the woods, naked except for his Nikes.

TO BE CONTINUED... 



The Halls of Academe Ch. 05



I stood stunned for a moment at Drew's revelation. Then I sprang into action. I pulled on my shorts and shoes as fast as I could, grabbed Drew's shorts and started after him. He was already across the paved path halfway up the hill, about to disappear into the wooded ridge above.

"Drew! For Pete's sake, wait up!"

He finally turned around and waited until I had reached him, my middle-aged body panting with exertion.

"Glenn, I'm going to find him," he said. His hair and skin were still damp from our recent swim. His chest was heaving and there was blue fire in his eyes. He looked magnificent. I had to pull myself back to reality.

"Okay, but put your pants on. The way you're going, you'll trip and spear your balls on a cactus somewhere."

That raised a smile, at least. Drew grabbed the shorts from me and put them on in one swift motion, then said, "Okay, let's go."

He started to climb the ridge with sinewy grace, me scrabbling after him. As I tried to avoid losing my footing on the loose rocks on the ridge between the scrubby cedar trees, I wondered just why Drew was so eager to find Nathan. What we would do when we confronted him?

We reached a smoother trail, which led off both to the right and left along the side of the hill. Drew turned to the right.

"I'm pretty sure he went this way."

By now I was out of breath again and sweating, but Drew showed no signs of slowing down. We hiked the ridge for what seemed like a long time, getting further and further away from our spot by the water. We were in a well-known cruising area. A couple of lone men passed us coming in the other direction, naked except for their shoes. They gave us long looks, hoping for some action, but Drew ignored them. His eyes searched the trail ahead and the hill above us.

Suddenly he stopped. "He's up there. And he's with someone."

"Drew, why are we doing this?"

He put a finger to his lips.

"Keep your voice down. You can bet his dad doesn't know he comes out here. But now we do."

"If you're over eighteen it's not a crime," I said, but Drew had already left the path and was threading his way between the trees that were practically the only vegetation on the steep hill. I tried to follow, but slipped on the gravel and almost fell. Drew looked back and offered his hand. I took it. His touch as always sent a jolt through me. I could feel the heat from his body, smell his sweat. The cool dip we had taken a little while ago seemed like ancient history. Despite my fatigue and the doubts in my mind I began to feel the excitement of the hunt.

"Is he-" I started to ask, remembering to whisper.

Drew turned. "Naked? Yeah. And so's the guy who's with him. Look."

He pointed. Some distance through the trees ahead I could see two figures embracing, dappled with the sunlight filtering down through the tree branches. His longish, dark hair told me that the one with his back against a tree was Nathan Lewis. I didn't immediately recognize the other one, who had shorter, dirty blond hair and fair skin that set off his muscles.

Nathan and his unknown partner were kissing, passionate and lustful. When they broke apart I could see their cocks jutting up between their bodies. We had stopped some distance away so as not to attract their attention, but we needn't have worried. They were oblivious to anyone and anything around them.

I was going to tell Drew we ought to go, that we'd seen enough, but the words died on my lips as I watched the two boys. My breath quickened and I could feel the heat rising between my own legs. I took a quick glance at Drew. He was watching Nathan and his friend with rapt attention, the bulge in his shorts obvious.

"If his father could see him now," he murmured. Neither of us moved a muscle. I told myself it was because I didn't want them to notice us, but the truth was I couldn't tear my eyes away.

The blond was now kneeling and sucking Nathan, whose hands were on his partner's head. His hands were in motion, grabbing and kneading Nathan's butt, roving up his torso and working his tits as his head slid back and forth. Faint moans and gasps reached our ears.

Soon they were both standing again, their tongues wrestling. The blond boy turned Nathan until he was facing the tree. A hand went to his mouth, then to his crotch.

"My god, he's going to fuck him," Drew said. Despite my guilty arousal I was appalled. There was no sign anyone was going to use a rubber.

Nathan bent and grabbed the tree with both hands, arching his back. His partner got behind him, grabbed his cock and guided it toward the target. We saw the quick thrust of the blond's hips and Nathan's head snapped up. His cry of pain rang loud and clear in the warm still air. He whipped his head back and we heard their voices murmuring, probably quarreling over the rough entry.

Nathan must have lost the argument, because he turned back toward the tree and put his head down again. His hair fell in front of his face, hiding it as his friend began to fuck him with quick, hard thrusts. Nathan braced himself with one hand and used the other to jack himself off while the blond hammered his hole. There was nothing tender or gentle about the sex. They were two boys half-crazed with lust, getting their rocks off.

It wasn't long before the gasps and grunts got louder. We saw the blond drill Nathan's ass even faster, his hips becoming a blur of movement. Then with a hoarse cry he jerked his head back, and I knew he was shooting his load. Spasms shook Nathan's body. Jets of fluid shot from his cock and onto the tree trunk.

We stood frozen, silent witnesses to their shared ecstasy. In a few moments their heads sagged in exhaustion. The blond boy lowered himself toward Nathan, kissing his back and neck, keeping his cock buried inside his ass. Nathan raised his head, smiling. As he brushed his hair back he turned his gaze in our direction. His eyes flew wide open, the look of startled horror in them almost comical.

"Oh shit!"

In a second the two naked boys were racing away through the woods in separate directions, sliding in the gravel, breaking branches in their haste to get away. When they were out of sight Drew turned to me and grinned.

"Guess they weren't into being watched."

I had been totally caught up in spying on Nathan's tryst, but now shame began to overcome my lust.

"We shouldn't have done that."

Drew shrugged. "They had their fun. So they got a little surprise. That'll teach 'em to fuck in the woods." He turned toward me. "Let's go. We've got to get our stuff."

We retraced our steps, trudging back down the hill toward the lake. Drew had a slight smile on his face. Something about his expression made me uneasy. "Drew, what are you thinking?"

"Well, I see us making a little deal with Mr. Lewis. He drops the sexual harassment charge and we won't tell Daddy what we saw him doing today."

I stopped in my tracks. "That's blackmail."

Drew's jaw set in that stubborn way I knew so well. "And your point? Hasn't that creep caused us enough trouble? We can shut him up for good."

"There's got to be another way." I didn't know why I was taking Nathan's side. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that I knew how Nathan felt. I knew what it was like to hide, to sneak around, always worrying about getting caught.

"Jesus, Glenn. Are you defending him? After what he did to us? Plastered 'fag' and 'queer' all over our office doors?"

"We don't know for sure he was the one." Something was nagging at me, tickling like a burr at the back of my mind, but I couldn't figure out what it was. I only knew I had to stop Drew from following his impulse to smash Nathan.

"Look, Drew. Suppose you try your plan on Nathan and it backfires. He goes to Elden and tells him you're threatening him. Elden goes to Jon."

"Then I'll tell them what was going on here. You can back me up."

"And the fact that you saw it? Elden doesn't like you. He could make plenty of noise about your just being at a nude beach. And Jon's already let us down once. I wish I didn't have to say this, but I'm not at all sure he'd defend you, especially since you're already under suspicion of sexual harassment." I didn't want to think about what might happen to me as well, tenured or not.

I saw Drew's face change. He saw what I was getting at and didn't like it. His fists clenched in frustration.

"Damn it. I hate that little shit."

I put my hand on his shoulder. "Nathan recognized us. If we sit tight I bet we'll hear from him first."

Drew thought about this. "Maybe you're right. But I'm telling you, Glenn, I don't know how I can just go on teaching him as if nothing happened."

I looked him in the eye. "That's exactly what you're going to do. And promise me one more thing."

"What?"

"If he comes to you, don't say or do anything. Just refer him to me."

Drew opened his mouth to protest, but I shook my head.

"I'm serious, Drew. Let me handle it. That's a request from your chair."

He stared, then lowered his eyes.

"Okay. I guess I did mess it up pretty bad the last time."

Inside I sighed with relief. I could only hope Drew would keep his word and not do anything rash. "We'd better get back to our spot. You want to take another dip? We sort of cut things short."

Drew shook his head. "Nah. All this walking's tired me out. Besides," he said with a leer, "Watching them back there got me kind of hot. Maybe we should go home and try that position ourselves."

I laughed. "One-track mind."

Things happened fast after that.

Nathan Lewis was absent from Drew's class for a week. I called the Academic Dean's office to find out if something had happened to him. There was no report of illness or other emergency. I thought about telling Elden about his son's disappearance from World History, but decided against it. He'd find out soon enough.

Drew got a message that the hearing concerning the sexual harassment charge against him had been scheduled for late March. I was still hoping there wouldn't have to be one.

But the most important thing happened purely by chance.

One day after my morning class I was walking toward the Union building to get a cup of coffee. As I got to the main entrance a student was walking out.

I have to admit I notice attractive male students around campus, though I try not to be too obvious about it. This one wore jeans and t-shirt, pretty much the standard male uniform around campus, but the t-shirt fit like a glove on his shoulders and chest, which were packed with muscle, surprising on his short, slender frame. The Levis were likewise tighter than the loose baggy things that were the style these days, bulging at the crotch in a way that would have caught my eye anywhere.

Trying not to stare at the obvious place I met his gaze, and started. Icy blue eyes glared at me beneath a shock of dark blond hair.

Why would a Steelman student I didn't know look at me with such hostility?

An abstract starburst design was emblazoned on the tanned skin of one bare forearm. In an instant my thoughts snapped into focus.

The tattoo had been only a blotch from fifty feet away in the woods, but the color combination-bright blue on pale gold-was something I'd remembered.

I didn't let my face give anything away as I entered the building, but my heart was pounding, my mind whirling. Nathan's boyfriend was another Steelman student. I'd probably seen him before around campus. That was what had been bugging me when I was trying to talk Drew out of blackmailing Nathan.

He in turn had recognized me as one of the dirty old men who'd been spying on them. What might he do with that knowledge? 

I phoned Philip Ramsey that afternoon. For someone so discreet, Phil was pretty up on who was gay on campus and what they were up to. I figured he might know Nathan's friend in the woods.

He guessed why I was calling. "Any leads on the perp?" he asked.

"Maybe. Is your office door shut?"

"Yeah. What's up?"

I described the student I'd seen that morning. Philip didn't take long to hazard a guess.

"Sounds like it could be Paul Heller. You think he did it?"

"I don't know. Could be."

"Hmm." Phil paused. "Well, for what it's worth, Paul Heller deserves his name. Remember me telling you about LEGAL, the gay students' association, voting to endorse outing? Paul's in LEGAL, and from what I hear, he was one of the ones pushing the idea the hardest. Said it was the only way to smash institutionalized oppression on the Steelman campus. What makes you think he's the one?"

I wasn't about to tell Philip the whole story, much as I liked him. "Not sure, Phil, but he certainly has it in for me for some reason. Gave me a look that could've frozen hell over. And I've never had him in class, had no idea who he was until you told me."

"Well, that's not a whole lot of evidence. Maybe you flunked his boyfriend or something."

"Yeah, maybe. Thanks." I hung up the phone and thought. So Nathan's bud was a member of LEGAL. He could have had access to the posterboard. It would make more sense, though, if the nasty signs had appeared after we'd seen them making it in the woods, rather than before. Otherwise, what did he have against me?

I had the feeling that pieces of the puzzle were falling together, and that the key, as it always had been, was Nathan Lewis. I reminded myself of what I had told Drew--it was better to wait, let him sweat a little. Still, it was hard not to seek him out myself and demand some answers.

I got them sooner than I could have imagined.

It was five o'clock the next afternoon. Despite all this hanging over our heads the normal business of Steelman College had to go on, and I was exhausted after a long day of teaching and work. I leaned back in my chair, stretching and yawning, my eyes bleary from staring at the computer screen. I'd just about decided to pack it in and call Drew when I heard a voice at my door. "Dr. Reynolds?"

Nathan must have planned to come when there weren't going to be many people around. I kept my face impassive. "Come in."

He entered the office, shutting the door behind him. I briefly debated telling Nathan to keep it open, then decided against it. Surely he wasn't going to level a sexual harassment charge at me as well. "What can I do for you?"

"I'm Nathan Lewis. My father's Professor Lewis, in the English Department." 

I nodded, not letting on that I knew very well who he was.

Nathan shifted back and forth on his feet, avoiding my eye. I couldn't help noticing how thin he was, how tired he looked, his hair unkempt and dark circles under his eyes.

"Could I sit down?" he asked.

I indicated the sofa. He sat in silence for several moments, then burst out, "I- I came to see what you were going to do."

"Do?"

Nathan finally looked at me. His eyes were wide and haunted. "About what you all saw last week. At the lake."

I paused a long time before I answered. "Nathan, Dr. Ohlen and I have not said a word to anyone about that. And we have no intention of doing so."

"I don't believe you!" Nathan exclaimed, startling me with his vehemence. He got up and paced the small office, grabbing his hair with clenched fists, then turned to me again. "Please. I'll do anything. Just don't out me to my dad. He'll disown me, if he doesn't kill me first." 

I shook my head. "I'm telling the truth. We're not outing anyone." I couldn't resist adding, "Dr. Ohlen and I have been outed ourselves recently. We know how unpleasant it is."

"That wasn't me." Nathan interrupted. "You've got to believe me."

"Okay, then." I held his gaze. "Have any idea who it was?"

"No." Nathan's eyes shifted. I didn't believe him, but decided not to push it for the moment.

"You know, Nathan, Dr. Ohlen and I are concerned about you."

Disbelief appeared in his face. "Why?"

"Well, we couldn't help noticing--your partner wasn't using protection."

"You mean a rubber?" Nathan snorted. "He'd never do that."

"So you and he are monogamous?"

Cynical laughter. "That's a good one. Paul's fucked every gay guy on campus, and some straight ones too."

I sighed. "So he's such a good fuck he's worth risking your life for?"

Suddenly Nathan's face crumbled in anguish. "No," he choked out. "Every time I tell myself I'm not going to do it any more with him. He won't let me break up. Says he'll tell my father if I do."

Indignation rose inside me. "Nathan, that's blackmail. He's abusing you. You don't have to put up with that."

He gave me a weary look. "You have no idea what my dad is like about gays. What he says about them. I know I never should have gotten mixed up with Paul. I couldn't help it. He just does something to me. That's how he got me to tell him about Dr. Ohlen."

"That you had a crush on Drew?"

"Yeah. He's hot." Nathan blushed. "I'm sorry. I know you and he-"

I shook my head. "No problem. What happened?"

"From the first day in his class I couldn't think of anything but him. I acted like an idiot. Sent him stupid little notes. I couldn't talk to him. Couldn't even hand in my papers in person. Had to go by his office and slide them under the door when I knew he wasn't there."

So Nathan was the one who had written those anonymous messages. "But he didn't return your feelings."

"He had no idea. I was just the dweeb sitting in the back, the class screw-up. I got so mad after a while. Why couldn't he see how I felt?"

"So you'd thought you'd get even. That's why you filed the harassment charge."

"Yeah." Nathan brushed his hair out of his face, the same way he'd done at the lake. His hands were fine, pale with long delicate fingers. "Stupid, huh? After a while I was sorry I'd done it. I finally screwed up the courage to go to Drew's-I mean Dr. Ohlen's office. I was going to tell him how I felt, ask him to forgive me. I lost it-started crying in front of him. He was nice, he hugged me. But then--he told me he had someone."

He looked at me again. "I guessed right away it was you. I'd seen you guys together. You can just tell sometimes."

I knew he was right. Dirk and I had tried our best to stay hidden back in that small Oklahoma town-but someone had guessed our secret. It was the old nightmare again. Remembering the despair and anger I'd felt made my voice harsh.

"So you got mad all over again. Decided to get revenge. Make me and Drew suffer for standing in your way."

"You mean the signs? I told you I had nothing to do with that." Nathan's voice rose. "Why won't you believe me?"

"Then who are you protecting, Nathan? You know who did it." Nathan was silent. "Don't you?"

No answer.

"It was Paul, wasn't it?"

My shot had hit home. Nathan's eyes grew even wider, and the color drained from his face.

"H-how did you know?"

He looked ill with fright. A voice inside warned me not to go too far, that this boy could be pushed over the edge real easy. I kept my voice calm.

"Just a guess. Paul's your boyfriend. He'd be jealous of anyone you like. He's a hothead who thinks outing people is social justice. I bet it was real easy to put him up to it."

"But I didn't!" Nathan was on the verge of tears. "I had no idea he was going to do that, Dr. Reynolds. He'd been after me to sleep with him for quite a while. After that meeting in Dr. Ohlen's office I was a basket case. I guess I was an easy mark. After we went to bed he got me to tell him everything. Somehow hearing about you and Dr. Ohlen pissed him off the most, I don't know why.

"When he told me that he'd put up the signs I couldn't believe it. Said I was going to turn him in. Then he got ugly, said he'd go to my father if I told, or if I broke up with him."

He looked at the floor. Despite all the trouble he had caused us I felt sorry for him.

"Nathan, listen to me. You can put all of this behind you."

He turned to me. "How?"

"Go to the Provost and tell him what Paul's done. Everything. He's threatened you, harassed us, and spread hate speech around campus. All this is grounds for expulsion, or at least suspension. We can get him out of here, fast."




The Halls of Academe Ch. 05



"I can't do that." Nathan was sullen. "Why would some straight administrative type care about my boyfriend problems?"

"Nathan, Dr. Evans is gay. He'll understand and support you." Before Nathan had a chance to react to this I went on. "Especially if you do what you were going to do and withdraw your sexual harassment charge against Dr. Ohlen."

Nathan shook his head, doubt clouding his eyes. "What if Paul comes back? What if he figures out I ratted on him, and tells my dad about me?"

"Don't give him that power over you." I went for broke. "Listen to me, Nathan. You've got to tell your father about yourself. Do that and you're free."

He jerked to his feet. "No. Didn't I tell you I can't do that. I've got to go." He walked toward the door.

"If you don't, someone else will."

He wheeled, eyes blazing. "Now's look who's talking blackmail."

I shook my head. "Nathan, people already know."

"What the hell do you mean?"

I told him what I had overheard in the cafeteria, weeks ago. "Don't ask me how they knew. But they did. How long before your father hears the rumor, if he hasn't already?"

Nathan's pale face grew even paler. "Christ. My life's over. I might as well off myself."

"No!" It came out sharper than I intended. "Think, Nathan. What's the worst that can happen if your father finds out?"

"He'll disown me. Throw me out. I'll be living on the streets."

I looked him in the eye. "You have my word-if your father throws you out, I'll take you in."

Disbelief crossed his face. I couldn't quite believe I'd said it myself.

"Why would you do that?"

I opened my mouth, and found the words without hesitation. "Those signs that Paul put up weren't the first time I've been outed, Nathan. It happened to me before. You can survive, if someone's there for you. I'll be there for you."

We stood in silence. Then I saw a tear start from his eye and roll down his cheek. The next moment he was in my arms, sobbing. I hugged him tightly to me, talking to him in a soft voice, trying to comfort him.

"It'll be okay, Nathan. Trust me."

A couple of weeks after that the hearing Drew and I had anticipated and feared for so long took place, though not like we'd imagined it.

Nathan had followed my advice, gone to Jon and told him the whole story. Paul Heller tried to tough it out at first, but eventually admitted he had posted the hateful signs. He was suspended from Steelman and ordered to leave campus immediately. A restraining order was issued so he couldn't return, which must have eased Nathan's mind a bit.

What was supposed to be the sexual harassment hearing was now going to be Nathan's public withdrawal of his charge. Drew and I sat in Jon's office late one Wednesday afternoon, mostly in silence, waiting for Nathan and his father. Relations between Jon Evans and me were still strained. I wasn't sure whether things would ever be the same between us, which made me sad.

There was a knock on the door and Nathan and Elden Lewis entered. The senior English professor gave Jon's hand a perfunctory shake, and barely nodded hello to us. Nathan fidgeted, pale and silent.

We all sat. Jon asked Nathan if he had a statement ready. Nathan nodded, and drew a piece of paper out of his pocket. The few sentences he read were brief and to the point. He was withdrawing the charge he had made against Professor Ohlen. He apologized to Dr. Ohlen for the distress and trouble he had caused.

Jon said to Drew, "Do you accept Mr. Lewis's apology, Dr. Ohlen? If you do, this means you promise not to take any retaliatory action against this student. No record of the charge will remain on any aspect of your permanent record, or in your professional file."

Drew nodded. "Yes, I accept this student's apology."

Just like that, it was over. A few minutes later we were walking out of the administration building, silent, still a bit in shock.

"Glenn?" A voice called behind me in the hallway. We turned. Elden Lewis was coming toward us. Nathan wasn't with him.

"Do we have to?" Drew muttered.

"Yes," I replied. I nodded to Elden as he caught up to us at the exit. Up close he looked haggard and worn, and to my surprise a wave of sympathy rose in me.

"I tried to get Nathan to come with me, but he wouldn't," Elden said. "He's withdrawing from school for the rest of this term."

"Understandable," Drew said, his lips tight.

Elden looked him in the eye then. "I know my son has caused you an awful lot of grief. I'm sorry about all of this."

A beat, then Drew gave a curt nod. I felt compelled to say something.

"I hope Nathan can get some help."

Lewis nodded. "All his life he's fought these feelings. It's made him crazy." 

I kept my voice even. "He's been fighting them because of you. It might help for you to let him know he doesn't have to."

Nathan's father stared at me. Drew said, "C'mon, Glenn." He pushed the door open and left. Elden still stood silent. I waited a moment longer, then shrugged and followed.

"I'm glad you said that," Drew said when I caught up to him outside.

I shrugged. "Fat lot of good it did. Nathan was terrified that Elden was going to disown him. Seems like that's not going to happen, at least."

"He might be better off disowned by that Neanderthal."

At the moment I'd had my fill of the Lewis family. "Let's go get some lunch. Off campus."

We were outside in the bright sun, walking back toward our building. Heedless of who might see, Drew put his arm around my shoulder. I smiled at him, my spirits lifting.

"We won, Drew."

"Yeah, we did." Drew lowered his voice as he drew me close. "God, I want to kiss you so bad." He felt me stiffen and grinned. "Don't worry, I won't. I know we're still in the real world."

We had a low-key celebration that evening at one of the nicer restaurants in town. It didn't seem right to be too exultant. Thinking about the two young men whose lives had collided with ours was sobering. There was Nathan, whose fear of exposure had prevented him from learning how to have a healthy relationship. There was Paul, who cloaked his anger and self-hatred under the guise of gay activism. In a hostile world it was so easy to turn against ourselves, become twisted and stunted.

Questions still remained in my mind. Why did Paul hate us so much? Nathan either didn't know or didn't want to say. The chance that we would find out what had motivated his attack was now pretty remote.

I looked across the table at Drew and decided not to worry. It was over. We had survived.

He caught my eye, smiled, and raised his wine glass.

"To you, Professor," he said. "You're my hero."

"Aw, don't." I blushed.

"Why not? It's the truth," Drew said. "You were right about everything. It wasn't Nathan who put up the signs. You got him to tell who did, and you got him to drop the sexual harassment charge. You're amazing."

I shrugged. "It could have turned out a whole lot different."

Drew shook his head. "Yeah, right, if I'd gotten to him first. Though, tell me, Glenn, would you really have let him live with you?"

I thought for a minute, then nodded. "Yes. It wouldn't have been for long. You can bet that Elden would have taken Nathan back pronto. Better to have a gay son at home than to have him in the clutches of a sodomite."

Drew chuckled. "Well, I'm glad it didn't happen. Your bed would have been a mite small for the three of us. Listen, I have a small favor to ask you."

"What?"

"When we get back to your place, can you fuck me?"

I gasped, then laughed out loud, even as my cock hardened in my pants. "I think that could be managed."

I took my sweet time before I gave Drew what he wanted that night.

First, I made him strip and give me a blow job kneeling before me in the living room. I stood fully clothed, watching him work on my erection jutting out of my open fly, a naked slave doing my bidding.

Then I took him to the bedroom and ordered him to climb onto the bed and kneel again, facing away from me with his head down, hands behind his back. I stripped off my clothes and bent toward his ass sticking in the air. I parted his cheeks to expose his asshole, winking at me out of the blond thicket that lined his crack. The next moment my tongue was snaking down the valley, wetting down the hairs and smoothing the way to its goal, the soft, velvety musky skin of his anus. The second I touched the soft flesh he moaned. Soon Drew was writhing on the bed, going crazy as I gave him a thorough rimming, pressing my face into his hole as if I could actually fuck him with my tongue. My own cock was rock hard with the degrading thrill of the act. Here I was, my face buried in another man's butt, kissing his ass, and loving it.

I stood, wiping the spit off my face, feasting my eyes on the V-shape of his muscular torso. Drew twisted his head around and smiled in anticipation as I grabbed the lube and greased myself with slow, twisting strokes. Then I climbed onto the bed, took my cock, lined it up and sank it in with one slow, steady push.

"Oh fuck." Drew's head snapped up, his eyes closed and his mouth opened. His triceps bulged as he braced himself on the bed with his hands.

I stayed upright, my hands on his back, so I could get a good view of my rod sliding in and out of his hole. I power-dicked him for a while, pulling all the way out, letting the glistening head of my cock just touch his rosebud until he was whimpering with need, then plunging back in up to the hilt.

"Unggh! Yes!" Drew cried in delight every time I hit bottom.

Later I turned him onto his back, holding his legs open with my hands. Now my cock penetrated him underneath his balls, which swung back and forth as he jacked himself off.

"Fuck me, Glenn." 

"Uh huh," I breathed as I thrust slowly and steadily into him. I held back because I was on the verge of shooting, and I wanted this to last.

It lasted long enough so I'll always remember how Drew looked in that position, helpless on his back, legs wide apart, jaw slack and eyes glazed. His hairy chest heaved, his muscles rippled and strained beneath his skin as he raised his head now and then to watch my cock split him open. His hand never stopped moving on his own rod, except to go to his mouth to replenish the spit he was using to lube himself.

We said very little. All of our communication was through the connection created by my cock in his asshole, the sparks of electricity it generated sliding against the sides of his chute, pressing against his prostate. I could feel everything he was feeling, his own pleasure as well as mine. I know he felt the same way.

I was amazed at how Drew abandoned himself to being fucked. He wasn't bottoming as a favor to me-he was reveling in his role. He wanted my cock up his ass more than anything in the world. Even in his subjugation he was taking the lead, showing me new possibilities, as he had done over and over during the past year.

Finally it had to end. I was almost sorry when his hand began to move faster and faster on his cock, and a low animal growl began to rise from his throat.

"Oh shit, I'm cumming!"

I stepped up the pace of my fucking until my cock was a piston in his ass. I saw the white jets squirt from his purple mushroom head over his chest and stomach just as I went off the edge myself, emitting strangled cries of ecstasy as I emptied my load deep into his bowel, fighting not to topple over onto his body.

As I started to come down I thought of a way to finish him off. I took my hand and scooped his sperm off his body, then pressed my sticky palm to his face. I felt his tongue as he ate his own load, but wasn't going to let him get off that easy. I shoved each of my fingers in his mouth for individual cleaning and didn't let him go until they were all licked. Finally I withdrew my hand and patted his cheek, then bent and kissed him long and deep, tasting my cum on his lips.

"Good boy," I said.

Drew smiled, the picture of exhausted contentment. "Thanks, Mr. Chairman."

I pulled out reluctantly. We lay side by side on the bed, wrapped in each other's arms. After a while Drew raised himself and smiled into my eyes.

"You're an incredible top. I want to be your bottom all the time from now on."

"Oh, no," I said, shaking a finger at him. "Me do all the work? I already do that in real life. You aren't getting off that easy. You stick with me, we switch off."

"Damn," Drew said in mock disappointment. "For a moment there I thought I had you."

"Well," I said, "I'm not going to be chair next year. Maybe we can renegotiate the contract. If you're still around."

Drew's smile disappeared. "Don't joke about that. I intend to be around for a long time."

My heart gave a jump. I looked at him with a steady eye. "Do you mean that, Drew?"

"Yes."

I hugged him, squeezing my eyes shut to keep the tears from starting, holding him so tightly that Drew protested, laughing as he tried to extricate himself.

"Hey, hey. I'm not going anywhere."

I let him go and looked away so he wouldn't see my emotion. "Every time I hold you I wonder how many more chances I'll have."

I felt Drew's strong hands on my face. He turned me so that I was looking into his deep blue eyes. "Listen to me, Glenn. We have all the time in the world now."

I believed him totally, trusted him with all my heart.

Drew believed what he was saying too, I'm sure of it.

Neither of us could have known then how wrong he was.

TO BE CONTINUED... 



The Halls of Academe Ch. 06



by K. Nitsua. Newly revised version copyright 2010 by the author.

*

For a while after Nathan Lewis retracted his sexual harassment charge life seemed as if it might be getting back to normal. Drew and I could concentrate on teaching our classes and dealing with the end-of-semester rush.

Marcia Hannon stopped by my office soon after the meeting with Nathan in the Provost's office.

"I got the word from Jon," she said. "I hadn't written Drew's evaluation yet, so no harm done. There won't be anything about the sexual harassment in it."

"Thank goodness for small favors," I said. I waited, but she didn't leave. After a moment, she said, "You all have been through a lot."

I snorted. "That's an understatement."

Marcia looked earnest and a bit pained. "Glenn, if I personally made things rougher than they had to be I'm sorry."

I shrugged. "You did what the Provost told you to do."

"I'm sorry all this came between us. I wish there was a way I could make it up to you."

"Well," I said, drawing out the word. "You could take over as Department Chair next year." Her eyes widened. I couldn't help laughing. "Well, you asked."

Marcia shook her head, rueful amusement on her face. "I guess I do owe you one, Glenn," she said.

"Think about it, Marcia. Word's out about Drew and me. I don't have any credibility as an administrator. Will you do it, not just for me, but for the department?"

After a moment she nodded. "Okay."

I rose from my chair and hugged her. "Thanks. If you need help, just ask."

"I'm not sure I can do this," she said against my shoulder.

"You'll be fine. Everything's going to be fine."

I spoke those words to her with more confidence than I felt. For one thing, even though the blackest storm over our lives had cleared, it still wasn't all plain sailing for Drew and me.

One morning I stopped by his office to find him tapping on his computer keyboard. He wheeled around when I came in, with an expression of guilt that startled me. A quick peek didn't show anything on the monitor that would have caused his reaction.

"What's up?" I said, pretending I hadn't noticed anything amiss.

Drew relaxed a bit, but his smile still seemed forced. "You scared me. I was just applying to this teaching workshop at Rollins this summer. Of course it's the last day I can submit the form so I was doing it online."

"You didn't tell me you wanted to go to that." I was puzzled. "You know, the Provost's Office can fund your attendance. I would have recommended you."

"Uh, yeah, I know." Drew hesitated. "I actually went to Jon myself a couple of days ago. He had a bit of extra money left, so I'm getting my tuition and expenses covered. I'll still have to pay my own way there. I was going to tell you, but I decided this kind of all at the last minute."

"Well," I said, feeling a bit hurt. "I wish I'd known. I could still give you something from the department's travel fund."

Drew raised his hand in a brusque gesture. "That's okay. I don't want the department paying my way, especially without the rest of the faculty being consulted. Thanks, though, Glenn."

I knew better than to argue with him when his mind was made up. Still, my own voice sounded phony as I said, "I'm glad it's only a week. I'll miss you."

Drew smiled, more genuine this time, and patted my hand. "We'll survive. Free for lunch today?"

I felt a little better then. A little voice continued to nag at me, though, no matter how hard I tried to ignore it. A few days later Jon Evans called me in for a meeting. I went to the main administration building with something of a bad attitude. I was still annoyed at the Provost for leaking news of the harassment charge against Drew to Marcia, though it hadn't done any harm in the end. My ability to hold grudges had been my undoing more than once but I couldn't help it. Even now I sometimes fantasized about what I might do if I ever saw one of the board members who had fired me from my teaching job in Oklahoma long ago.

I have to give Jon credit. As soon as I sat down he got to the point.

"Glenn, I owe you an apology."

I stared at him, not bothering to disguise my surprise. "For what?"

Jon's eyes were clear and direct. I hadn't seen that look from him in a while. "You were absolutely right. I never should have shared the information about Drew's sexual harassment charge with Marcia. That was an inexcusable breach of a faculty member's privacy. I've already apologized to Drew, but I wanted to let you know as well."

"Well." I was stunned, and it took me a moment to find my voice. "It's all water under the bridge. At any rate it turned out okay."

"Yes, for you and Drew. I wasn't so lucky. I've lost your friendship."

He was asking me to forgive him. I stumbled over my words. "I was angry too, Jon, and said things I shouldn't have. I'm not exactly objective when it comes to Drew." There was a lump in my throat and I was embarrassed. "But I appreciate you saying all of this. And I still consider you a friend. Even if you do make thirty thousand a year more than I do."

Jon laughed, but when he spoke his voice was gruff. "For that kind of dough you'd think I wouldn't screw up this bad." He expelled a long sigh. "Thank you, Glenn."

I changed the subject as quickly as I could. "Is it true Drew came to you about attending the Rollins teaching workshop?"

"Yes. I told him he could ask you to fund him, but it seemed important to him that--well, forgive me, Glenn, but he didn't seem to want you to know that he was interested in going."

I shook my head, not disagreeing. "Why would he be that way? I support anyone in the department who wants to improve their teaching."

Jon was silent for a long moment. When he spoke again he chose his words carefully. "Glenn, I've heard some advance buzz from a friend at Stanford U. Press about Drew's book. The word is it's good. Good enough to put Drew on some pretty big radar screens in academia."

He paused. "What I mean is, I think we have to prepare ourselves for the fact that he might be gone, very soon."

I stared at him. "Jon, he promised me he would stay at Steelman. That he intended to be here for a long time. Why would he say that if it weren't true?"

My steps were slower than usual as I walked away from the administration building. Try as I might I couldn't get Jon's words out of my mind. But if Drew were really looking for another job, why was he going to the teaching workshop? There was no opening at Rollins that I knew of, and anyway, he'd be aiming higher than that sort of institution.

The Steelman campus was dotted with shade trees that kept the heat of the approaching summer somewhat at bay. Standing underneath one some distance away I spotted a familiar figure, his back turned. I'd know those broad shoulders and tightly packed buns anywhere. But what was Drew doing under that tree?

Just as I started walking toward him he ducked behind the trunk, as if he'd sensed movement and wanted to conceal himself. He was holding his cell phone to his ear. Though I could hear his voice it was too far away for me to make out the words.

I stopped in my tracks. Something about his behavior, the furtive manner in which he was having a conversation with an unknown person, brought the doubts that had already been planted in my mind rushing up to the surface.

All of a sudden I didn't want him to see me. I started off in the opposite direction, taking a roundabout route to my building and to my office, trying to concentrate on the walk and the exercise, making my mind a blank.

I was fairly successful at that until I got back to my office and sat down at my desk. It wasn't until I'd been there several minutes that I realized that the tightness in my chest had nothing to do with my recent exertion. I closed my eyes, heaved a sigh, and put my head down on the desk.

We were in the middle of exam week and I was grateful for that-I had nothing to do for the rest of the day. After a few minutes I got up and went home.

Since mid-semester Drew had been spending more and more time at my place, to the point where we were practically living together. He usually came back in the late afternoon, in time for us to eat dinner. Today I found myself dreading his return. I didn't want to confront him-after all, what had I seen? But my suspicions and anxieties were increasing to the point where I couldn't just act as if nothing were going on.

The afternoon wore on and turned into early evening. There was no sign of Drew. I called his apartment, on the chance he had gone there. No answer. Calling his office produced the same result.

I watched the TV screen without seeing anything, scanned the newspaper without remembering a thing I'd read. Finally I gave up and sat on the couch in my living room, staring into space.

I suddenly realized I was on the verge of jumping in my car and driving to that park I'd last gone to a few months before, just after Paul had posted the hateful signs. The desire to seek quick release was so great it was a physical struggle to keep from going out the door. "Don't do it," I said out loud. Finally the craving passed.

I don't know how long it was before I heard his footsteps. The door opened and Drew came in, flooding the room with his cheerful energy, shocking after the gloom that had filled it for hours.

"God, I am sorry. Believe it or not, I just came from school."

"I called your office." Despite my efforts to keep my voice even Drew sensed something was wrong. He raised his eyebrows.

"I was giving a final in World History Survey. Didn't I tell you? Anyway, it must have been harder than I thought. Three students took till the very end of the period. I had to wait it out and collect their papers. That's what took so long. Toward the end I was sitting in the hallway outside the exam room, drumming my fingers. Sorry, I should have known you might be trying to call."

I shrugged. "Doesn't matter."

Drew pursed his lips, and the challenging look I knew so well appeared. "Okay, this isn't just about my being late. Want to tell me what's on your mind?"

I took a deep breath, then plunged ahead. "Why are you going to that teaching workshop?"

His eyes shifted. "Why does anyone go?"

I rushed on, even though I already knew the answer. "You wait until the regular deadline to apply for travel money is long gone, then you go to the Provost without telling me, even though you know the department could pay your way. Don't make me drag it out of you, and please don't lie to me."

Silence, then Drew nodded.

"Okay. A couple of weeks ago I got a call from the chair at-"

Despite myself I was impressed. Jon had been right.

"They've had an unexpected opening. Someone in their department got booted. Sexual harassment." He snorted. "How ironic is that?

"Well, when they told me the reason the guy had left I had no choice. I told him the whole Nathan thing right then and there. Waited for him to say thank you and hang up. Well, he didn't hang up."

"Anyway, the chair's one of the keynote speakers and presenters at Rollins this summer, so he suggested I come, just to talk. Said he wanted to keep the whole thing low-key, not do a formal interview. Doesn't have to anyway, because this isn't the permanent job. If he likes what he sees at Rollins, he'll offer me a one-year visiting position. It's just one year, Glenn."

I stared past him at a spot on the living room wall.

"You know damn well that's not true. You'll go, you'll be brilliant, they'll offer you the tenure-track job. Bingo."

"Glenn-"

"Don't tell me you'd turn it down. Don't insult my intelligence."

He was silent. Bitterness welled up in me.

"All that stuff about staying here for a long time. I might have known it was bullshit."

His eyes snapped with anger. "You have to make this just as hard as you can, don't you?"

My temper flared in return. "Like I'm supposed to make it easy?"

Drew sighed. "If you only knew what hell I've been going through. To leave this place. To leave you, even if it's only for a year. I can't imagine it. But, Glenn--"

I waved a hand. "Don't." A long pause. I had to force my next words out. "If I were in your place I'd do the same."

"Glenn-"

"I want to be by myself for a while." He started to speak again but I cut him off. "Please."

I heard the front door slam. I didn't move for a long time after that. It grew dark. I didn't turn on any lights.

Finally I stood, meaning to try and fix myself something to eat. Instead my feet led me out the front door, down the street, and toward Drew's apartment building.

I climbed the steps to his second-floor flat and rang the bell. He opened the door immediately. I stepped in and fell to my knees in front of him.

"Please don't go. I love you," I said.

Drew grasped my arms and lifted me to my feet. His eyes were dark pools of hurt. He put two fingers to his lips, then placed them on mine. I pulled them away and kissed him, hard.

"Make love to me."

He nodded. We went to his bedroom. Slowly he removed every stitch of clothing I had on, kissing what he uncovered. When I was naked he led me to the bed and made me lie there, watching him do the same.

Drew and I had done it in every conceivable position, played bondage games, laughed, joked and shouted while we played. Tonight there was none of that. We were silent, clinging to each other, looking into each other's eyes at every possible opportunity. I kissed him until my lips were chapped and sore, sometimes hard and passionate, thrusting my tongue in to meet his, sometimes soft and tender, caressing his lips with mine. I closed my eyes as his own lips and tongue found all of my sensitive places, my nipples, my navel, the insides of my thighs, and finally, my hard, aching cock and hungry ass.

When he finally turned me onto my back, spread my legs and entered me I grabbed his butt and shoved him as far inside me as I could, then wrapped my arms around his body and drew him close. I was bent double underneath him, my calves braced against his shoulders, helpless and vulnerable.

"Hold me. Fuck me."

Usually Drew laughed when I let my need show too openly. Now he simply nodded as he took possession. I gasped softly every time he hit bottom, until finally my hand grasping my cock drew the orgasm from me in hot spurts that mixed with our sweat, gluing us together. Seconds later Drew squeezed his eyes shut, his breath hissing through gritted teeth as he shot his load into me.

We kept hold of each other in the aftermath, our breath bathing each other's faces.

"I wish I could make it easy for you to leave," I told him. "But I can't."

Drew smiled. "I don't want it to be easy." He kissed me, for the hundredth or so time that night. "Let's not fight anymore. We have the whole rest of the summer."

He made it sound like such a long time. I nodded and closed my eyes as I buried my face in his hair.

Drew left for the Rollins workshop a couple of weeks later. When he came back we picked up where we left off. Other than a few general questions I asked him nothing about his week there, and he didn't volunteer anything.

I was in my office one day later that month when the phone rang. I picked it up and heard an unfamiliar voice.

"Professor Reynolds? This is--"

It was a name anybody in our field would have recognized--the kind of academic who appears on CNN to provide background on a breaking news story. I also knew he was the chair of the department at the school that was interested in Drew.

I managed to get out, "What can I do for you?" without sounding like an idiot.

"Do you have a few minutes to talk? It's about a colleague of yours-James Druther Ohlen."

"Drew. Absolutely." I don't remember what I told him--the usual compliments. I ended by giving Drew my highest recommendation. I bade the renowned professor a cordial farewell and put down the phone.

"Have we lost the magic, Glenn?" Drew asked in my bed that evening. It was one of the rare times my body hadn't leapt to attention at the mere sight of him. I told him who had called, and watched his face change. I couldn't resist a little dig. 

"A lot of places will do that nowadays, Drew. They'll call people who aren't on your reference list, just to see if they can dig up dirt. Little do they know."

I stroked his back.

"Of course, I had to tell him you were a lousy teacher and a worse colleague. Just to make sure you'd stay here." His eyes widened. "Gotcha," I said.

He laughed and swooped down, pinning me to the mattress. "Asshole," he said, just before he kissed me, hard. Our lips and tongues did battle and I felt the heat that had been absent so far that evening rise.

"So what are you going to do with this asshole?" I asked him.

"One guess," he said, as he started to lift my legs.

"Not so fast." I grabbed his hands and shoved them away, shaking my head. His eyebrows rose and he tried again. Same result, only this time I kept my grip on his wrists. He laughed at the challenge.

"Okay, if that's the way you want it."

We began to wrestle with furious concentration, arms and shoulders straining, muscles bulging as I fought to get and stay on top.

"Oh, shit!"

We had gotten too close to the edge of the bed and rolled off, hitting the floor with a thud, fortunately both on our sides. The match continued unabated, the bedroom filled with our panting and grunting. The erotic nature of our struggle hardened our cocks to steel. Despite the fact that Drew was younger and stronger I gained the upper hand and managed to pin his shoulders to the floor.

"Fucker," he said, grinning. His chest hair was matted with sweat. We were both gasping for air.

"Concede?" I managed to get out. He nodded. I let him go and straightened, keeping a wary eye on him, but Drew just lay there, chest still heaving, a slight smile on his face.

"What are you smirking about?" I asked.

"Wondering what you'll claim as your prize," he said.

"One guess." I got to my feet and grabbed the lube by the bed. I stood over him as I greased my dick. Drew watched me with rapt attention.

"Stand up, turn around and grab your ankles," I said.

Drew's smile broadened into a grin. "Yes, sir," he said as he obeyed. "Oh fuck, my hamstrings."

I looked at him, bent double in submission. His muscular cheeks were spread wide, exposing the small, tight hole surrounded by fine hair. My cock hardened even more as I took in the sight. I grasped his hips, and a moment later I was inside him, watching his sphincter kissing my shaft as it slid in and out. 

Drew's breathing was harsh and noisy. When he tried to raise his head I put my hand on the back of his neck and forced it down again, tipping him forward so that he was off balance, totally dependent on me for support. 

I fucked him long and slow in that position, until finally my arms tired of holding him up. I stepped up the pace as I reached underneath his body, grabbed his erection and began to stroke it hard.

"Oh, shit," Drew gasped, as long ropes of cum shot downward out of his bursting cock, some onto his neck and chest, but most striking his face. 

By now my breath was coming in short harsh gasps. "Fuck that's hot, watching you take it. Take it...Oh God!"

My rod pulsated as it unloaded into him. When I was finished I pulled Drew to a standing position, wrapped my arms around his chest and backed up until we fell onto the bed, me underneath, my cock still in him. I drank in the odors of sex, sweat and semen, licking up a trickle of cum running down his cheek.

Finally we uncoupled and lay side by side, still panting. After a while Drew raised himself and looked into my eyes.

"I'll miss this," he said. "I'll miss you."

"You'd damn well better," I said, swallowing the lump that had suddenly risen in my throat. 




The Halls of Academe Ch. 06



He looked up at the ceiling a long while before he spoke again.

"You know, they haven't actually offered me the job."

I shook my head. "Please. With your book coming out? And your other credentials? You're gone."

"Funny thing," Drew said, "At the interview, he was talking up the light course load, how I could spend time doing my research instead of teaching, and I thought to myself, but I really like to teach now."

"You like it because you're good at it."

Drew raised himself and turned to me again. "Because of you, Glenny. You taught me how to relate to students, meet them halfway, draw them out."

I blushed. "That's sweet."

"It's the truth. Why would I say it otherwise?" He grinned. "I don't need to suck up to the chair now." 

I heaved a sigh. "Don't rub it in. What am I going to do without you?"

"You'll find someone good."

I reached out and drew him toward me. "I'm not talking about the department."

We went to the lake many times that summer. I took my digital camera and got some shots of Drew to remember him by, some of course strictly for private consumption. One day we handed the camera to a fellow sunbather and asked him to snap us together. I had that picture framed. Drew and I are facing the camera, smiling. I'm in back with one arm draped over his shoulder. We're naked, of course, but decent--only our upper bodies are visible, tanned and golden against the rocks and blue water and sun behind. 

The stranger who took the photo was practically salivating over Drew, to his great amusement. He tried to wheedle a full frontal shot out of us. We compromised and agreed to e-mail a somewhat more discreet photo of Drew to him.

"He was angling for a three-way," I said as we left the lake. "Did you see how he kept touching himself? Pathetic."

Drew shook his head. "Aw, he wasn't that bad. Decent body. And did you get a look at that dick? Grade A prime."

"There's more to a man than his genitals. Anyway, I'm not into group scenes."

"Really?" Drew said. "You've never thought about it?"

I shook my head. "Never have. Never will."

Drew said nothing, but looked thoughtful.

Even though few people were around on campus now the rumor mill still seemed to operate. Although Drew hadn't as yet received an official offer, word got around that he was leaving.

"How many people have you been telling?" he complained to me. "I keep getting congratulated."

"Please," I said. "What do you take me for? I never say anyone's coming or going until the contract is in hand."

"Speaking of which," Drew said, "The contract came yesterday."

So it was actually going to happen. "Pretty late," I said, talking fast before my emotion could get the upper hand. "Must be because it's a last-minute hire. Better sign it and send it back quick."

Drew said nothing.

"You did already, didn't you?"

He nodded. "Don't be mad."

I smiled at him, though it took an effort. "I'm past being mad. You'd better send the Provost your official leave request too." We were still keeping up the fiction that Drew was only going for a year. "I've got to fill your position for the fall and I don't have a great deal of time to do it. In other words, make things a little easier for your chair, okay?"

Drew knew what I was saying. "Okay."

When a faculty member leaves an educational institution, it's a drawn-out process. After writing the appropriate letter Drew flew up to the Northeast to look for a place to live. In his absence I filled out the exit paperwork for him so that Steelman could officially open his position. When Drew came back there was the task of helping him clean out his office and his apartment. After that he had to take the stuff he had accumulated at my place-I was surprised at how much there was. That, of course, was the hardest.

Finally, though, it was done. Drew Ohlen moved to New England at the beginning of August.

I drove him to the airport. We didn't say much. My mind was filled with thoughts of the first time I had driven him on this route, and how different things were now. Drew spent most of the ride looking out the car window.

I went inside with him, which was a mistake. I held it together until we got to the security checkpoint, but when I started to wish him a safe trip I choked up.

Drew put down his laptop, grabbed me and hugged me tight. "You'll see me again before you know it," he said in my ear. I nodded, grimly determined not to cry. Suddenly I jumped. He had given my crotch a secret squeeze, just like the first time. He winked at me and was gone.

TO BE CONTINUED...



The Halls of Academe Ch. 07



 Revised version copyright 2006 by the author.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the final chapter and the conclusion of "Halls." Thanks to all of you who've written and told me you've enjoyed Glenn and Drew's story. This will be the last of the "Steelman Tales" for quite a while, I suspect. KN

I didn't have much time for the next few weeks after Drew's departure to mourn his absence--there was too much work to be done as the beginning of fall term approached. The immediate task was to find a temporary replacement for the following year. I finally hired a graduate student and teaching assistant from the large state university nearby, a pleasant, earnest young woman halfway through her dissertation. 

Marcia and I met for lunch the day after the candidate's interview.

"Good hire," she said. "Promising scholarship, terrific teaching evals, nice person." 

I nodded. We ate in silence for a few minutes.

"How are you doing?"

I knew what she was asking. "Oh, okay. It was hard for a while, but it's getting better. I miss him a lot, of course."

She nodded. "It was fun having someone of that caliber around, even it was just for a year. Kind of a wake-up call for the rest of us. I finally finished and submitted that article I've been working on forever." 

I smiled. "Good timing. You're going to be pretty busy once school starts."

She grimaced. "Don't remind me." She shot me a sly look. "You know, now that Drew's gone..."

I patted her hand. "Sorry, but I'm still stepping down as chair. Hiring Patricia was my last official act."

Marcia shrugged. "Had to give it a try. Do you want me to initiate her paperwork? Might as well get started."

I had told myself not to expect any regular correspondence from Drew, so I was pleased to get an e-mail from him soon after the semester started.

"I'm going crazy trying to keep my head above water, but I wanted to let you know my book is out," he said. "I'm sending you a copy."

When it arrived I opened it. Drew had inscribed a message in front: "To Glenn, thanks for everything. Love, Drew." I was torn between being annoyed that it wasn't more personal and pleased that he had at least written the word "love," even if he couldn't say it to me.

Messages from him were infrequent that fall. I was glad, in a way, because it was easier for me not to dwell on his absence, at least during the days. Still, when I saw the e-mail from him a couple of weeks later, I opened it immediately.

Drew was in a chatty mood, talking about his new position. "Working with grad students is a bit of a change from Steelman, but I'm getting used to it. One of my colleagues here, I have to say, is quite extraordinary. And I'm not just talking about his intellect . Hope you'll be coming to the national convention this year. I can't wait to see you again and introduce Anton to you."

A hollow feeling rose in the pit of my stomach as I read his message. During the crisis last spring I had promised to give Drew some space. Though my brain knew most likely he was never coming back to Steelman, my heart had held out the hope that we could continue, in some fashion.

Drew, it seemed, had other plans, and was wasting no time in putting them into action. Try as I might to rationalize that it hurt.

The next few days were difficult. During school hours my work kept me company but I couldn't work around the clock. In the evenings the house was silent and empty without him there. My empty bed was barren and uninviting. I found myself waking in the middle of the night, not being able to go back to sleep.

On top of everything else I was climbing the walls. It wasn't just Drew's intellectual company I was missing.

That weekend I went back to the park, knowing this time exactly why I was going. I hiked along the same back trail I had taken months earlier. I passed several other men but ignored all of them. Now that I was here I suddenly found myself not in the mood. After half an hour I decided to give up and leave. As I was walking back toward the trailhead and the parking lot, though, I saw him.

He was a short, dark-haired man, with a mustache he had probably grown to make his smooth, unlined face look older. Even so, he looked to be no more than in his mid-twenties. He was dressed in a form-fitting gray T-shirt and jeans, typical cruising wear that showed off his tight, muscular body.

He was standing in the woods, a little bit off of the trail so that he was in shadow, his thumbs hooked into his pockets. His gaze was direct and unmistakable. I stared back, wondering if someone this young and attractive could possibly be interested in me.

He turned and walked further back among the trees, throwing a glance back over his shoulder. I felt the heat rise in me and made up my mind, stepping off the path to follow him.

"Excuse me," a low voice said behind me. I turned, startled. Another man stood on the trail, about the same age as my object of interest, though not as attractive. He was tall and lanky, dressed in polo shirt and shorts, with dark hair and a neatly trimmed goatee. His eyes were framed by wire-rimmed glasses, giving him an owlish appearance.

I nodded quickly back at him and turned to follow the other man.

"I wouldn't go in there if I were you."

I wheeled around. "Why the hell not?"

The man shook his head. "Vice cop."

"Really?" I said, surprised.

He nodded. "It's a sting operation. His friends are back there. You unzip, they nab you. I saw them take a couple of guys away in handcuffs a while ago."

"No kidding." I stepped back onto the path. "Well, thanks for telling me. We'd better get out of here." I started to walk past him but he put a hand on my arm.

"Do you have to leave?"

I snorted. "You just told me the place is full of cops."

He lowered his voice. "You have a place? I'd ask you back to my apartment, but I have a roommate."

This was moving faster than I'd intended. I was on the point of making some excuse but there was something about him, an urgency that matched mine. Against my will desire surged up, mixed with a peculiar excitement at the thought of outsmarting the police. "We can go in my car. I'll bring you back here."

"That'd be nice. My name's Jason, by the way, Jason Stedman. Pleased to meet you," he said, offering his hand. I shook it and said my name, suppressing a smile at his formality.

We crossed the parking lot and got in my car. There wasn't much talk on the way home. I regretted my rash decision, though Jason seemed nice enough. It was one thing to go into the woods and impulsively relieve an unbearable need. Picking someone up and bringing him home was a much more calculated act. I didn't like what that said about me.

"You a professor?" Jason asked, when we entered my house.

"How did you know?" I replied, a bit startled that he had figured that out.

"Chronicle of Higher Ed," he said, pointing to a newspaper sitting on the table just inside my front door. 

"Oh. Sorry, the house is a mess. I wasn't planning on company."

"Unexpected company's the best kind." Jason smiled and put his hand on my chest. "Thanks for inviting me."

I felt myself responding to his touch and it made me nervous. "Are you always this polite?"

Jason unbuttoned the top button of my shirt, his eyes dark with desire. "Actually I'm not nearly as well-mannered with my clothes off."

He slipped his hand inside and found a nipple. I drew in my breath, and my cock suddenly came to life.

"I love older men, especially when they're as hot as you," Jason murmured as he pressed his lips to mine.

A few minutes later we were on my bed. Without his glasses Jason looked even younger. His body was lean and long, not at all like Drew's. His chest and stomach were dusted with fine dark hair. His arms and legs were corded with muscle, roped with veins. His cock was as slender as his body, as straight and as hard as only a young man's organ can be.

"You must exercise," I said.

"Distance running," Jason said as his lips roved down my chest. He looked up and grinned. "And sex."

He took me into his mouth, running his hands up and down my thighs. I raised my knees and raised my head, watching him work. My body liked what he was doing. It felt good to be wanted. I couldn't help letting out small murmurs of pleasure as he flicked his tongue around my crown and into the opening at the top of the head.

"You're good," I said.

He paused and smiled up at me. "Thanks, man," he said, before resuming his labors. In another minute or so I gasped and pulled away.

"Don't want to cum yet. If I do we're through for the day." 

Jason nodded. "I wouldn't want that. You have a great cock. I'd love it if you'd fuck me." 

I was going to demur, until I remembered I still had a half-empty box of condoms in the medicine cabinet. Drew and I, of course, hadn't used them lately. I watched the muscles working in Jason's small, firm butt as he went to get them.

He came back to the bed holding a foil packet. He tore it open and hooded me, greasing the outside with neat precise motions using the lube that I handed him. Then he straddled my body and took hold of my cock. A moment later I felt the squeezing warmth of his ass on my shaft. Jason's eyes widened and his mouth opened. He smiled at me.

"Just what the doctor ordered," he said, as he began to ride my erection, pumping his long thighs with quick, enthusiastic motions, jacking his own stiff cock at the same time, making his balls jiggle up and down.

I started thrusting up to meet his downstrokes, which got his vocal approval. Soon I sat up and turned him onto his back, bending him double underneath me as I drilled into him with long deep strokes.

Jason's hand never stopped moving on his cock. "Yeah, fuck me. Oh yeah. Feels so good, your cock inside me. Going to shoot. Oh fuck, here it comes...Oh yeah," he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut and grimacing as white spurts shot from the tip of his rod and across his body.

As his orgasm passed his eyes sought my own. "Jack yourself off in my face," he said. When I didn't respond right away he repeated his request with more urgency.

I didn't particularly want to pull out of his ass, but I obeyed and pulled off the rubber. Jason closed his eyes as I straddled his chest, murmurs of anticipation rising from his throat. The thought of humiliating him with a faceful of cum was hot, and my cock, which had softened partway, grew steely hard again as I jacked it above his eager face. In just a few moments I groaned and pitched forward, unloading onto his forehead, cheeks and lips in long, hot spurts. Jason smiled, keeping his eyes tightly closed, as he tossed his head from side to side.

After a few minutes I rose to my knees. My thighs ached from the unaccustomed exertion. "If those cops could see us now," I said, still panting.

Jason opened his eyes gingerly and grinned. My cum was running off his face and onto the sheets, a white clot clinging to his beard. "Score one for the sodomites."

The mindless desire that had carried me through the day was gone. Suddenly I wanted this to be over. I went into the bathroom and got rid of the condom. When I came back out with a towel Jason was still lying on the bed. He smiled and raised an arm in invitation, but I didn't take the hint. I tossed him the towel, picked up my clothes and started to dress.

"I'll take you back."

"Is it okay if I clean myself up a little first?" Jason asked.

I'd seen the hurt look pass across his face and felt ashamed. "Sure you can. There's another towel by the shower if you need it. Listen," I said, as he got up and walked toward the bathroom, "Thanks again for cluing me in on the sting."

Jason came over and hugged me. He really was a sweet guy. "Don't mention it. What would your students do without you?"

Back at the parking lot he turned to me. "I'd like to see you again, Glenn."

I shook my head, trying to figure out how to let him down gently. "I don't think so, Jason. I--well, I have a partner." At least in my mind.

"Oh." He turned and stared out the windshield. I had the feeling this wasn't the first time Jason had heard those words. "Well, seems like you guys have an open relationship. Maybe we could do a threesome sometime."

"Yeah, maybe." I didn't have the heart to tell him the truth.

"I'm a grad student at the University. Just go their web site and search under my last name. It's Stedman--S-T-E-D-M-A-N."

I nodded, wishing he'd leave. "Got it, Jason. Take care of yourself."

I breathed a sigh of relief when the car door finally slammed. As I was backing out to head toward the exit, I saw the young man Jason had stopped me from following emerge from the trail. I braked to a halt, curious. Another man was walking next to him. They were close together, and at first I thought he had picked up a trick, that Jason had been mistaken. Then they turned in a strange unison and I saw the glint of metal. The second man's hands were handcuffed behind his back.

I drew a bath when I got home. Soaking in the hot water was comforting, as if I were cleansing myself of sin. And there was a lot of sin to be cleansed.

I realized what had driven me to the park. I'd been angry and jealous that Drew had found someone new with such ease. In my zeal to get back at him I'd used a nice boy as an object to get my rocks off, someone who deserved better. I'd also risked arrest as a sex offender, which would have torpedoed my career.

Dried off and dressed in a bathrobe, I sat in my living room and picked up the picture of Drew and me together at the lake. I hadn't looked at it often these past few months, finding it too painful to think about happier times.

Tonight, though, something was different. The people in the photo seemed like two strangers. Drew and I had had something good, maybe even great. But it was gone. Making a fool of myself was not going to bring it, or him, back.

"Get it together," I said out loud. I put the photo down, got out a stack of blue book exams I should have started grading earlier that day and began reading.

I wrote to Drew the next day, saying that I was looking forward to seeing him at the national conference, and to meeting his colleague. It was easier than I thought it would be.

After that escapade I stuck to more productive uses of my spare time. It finally sank in that Marcia taking over as chair meant that I had time to read things other than department budgets, committee meeting agendas and student papers. I read Drew's book. I grabbed time in the library, reading articles in journals I had previously merely skimmed. I pulled out the text of a presentation I had made several years previously, and began to work on turning it into an article.

Almost before I knew it February rolled around, and I was on a plane heading for Chicago and the national historians' conference. While I was waiting in the crowded, noisy lobby of the downtown hotel to register, shifting my weight from one foot to another, I heard my name called. I turned to see Drew approaching, beaming, followed by another man. He hugged me hard, then stepped back and scanned me from head to toe with a critical eye.

"You," he announced, "Look terrific. Not being chair agrees with you."

"So do you," I said, which was the truth. My heart was pounding at the sight, scent and touch of him after months of separation. I could intellectualize all I wanted about the two of us moving on, but my body had other ideas.

Over his shoulder I caught the eye of his companion. "And this must be Anton."

Anton Messier was a well-groomed and very attractive black man. From the very first time Drew had written me about him I had wondered whether they were sleeping together. Now that I saw Anton in the flesh I was sure that was the case.

Drew must have told Anton about our history. He went out of his way to be deferential to me, even though my credentials were nowhere near his in prestige. It was hard to resist his charms, and after half an hour it was as if we were old friends.

The three of us went to dinner the next evening, after Anton had delivered his paper. Once or twice during the meal I caught Drew looking at me with a gentle, conspiratorial look on his face. I smiled back, though I wondered what was up.

Late that evening, while I was watching TV back in my hotel room, I heard a soft knock on the door. When I opened it there stood Drew and Anton, dressed casually. Anton was holding a bottle of Scotch and a tub of ice.

"How about a nightcap?" Drew said.

"Sure, what a nice surprise," I replied, letting them in.

We poured ourselves drinks and lounged, Drew and I stretched out on each of the two double beds, Anton sitting in the one easy chair. We swapped stories of university faculty and sexual harassment accusations.

"Speaking of which," I told Drew, "Nathan Lewis is back at school this year."

Drew rolled his eyes. "Don't remind me."

"He's actually been all right. Seems a lot happier. Says hello in the hallway. I heard he moved out of his father's house into his own apartment."

"That's a step in the right direction."

Conversation continued to flow as gently and easily as the liquor. On top of the wine I'd had at dinner it didn't take long until I was buzzed.

Eventually there was a lull in our chatter. Drew pulled his shirt out of his jeans, yawned and scratched his stomach. I found myself staring at the strip of taut, hairy skin that he was exposing, as well as the healthy bulge in his denims. Not long ago I'd had that body for my own. For the first time that evening I was envious of Anton.

Drew caught my eye just then. He smiled at me, then cast a glance across the room.

"Excuse me. Nature calls." Anton got up, a bit unsteady, walked into the bathroom and shut the door.

"Jesus, it's hot in here," Drew said. "Mind if I get a bit more comfortable?" He kicked off his shoes. Thinking he was going to stop there, I was flabbergasted when he unbuckled his belt and began to peel off his jeans. I stared as he stripped down to a pair of skimpy, well-filled briefs.

"What the hell are you doing?" I demanded. Suddenly the front of my pants felt awfully tight.

Drew smirked. "Getting more comfortable, like I said."

"You do remember we're not alone, right?"

Before Drew could reply I heard the toilet flush, and the bathroom door opened. Out came Anton, carrying his clothes. I gaped at his glowing, muscular form, and what I saw between his powerful thighs.

They glanced at each other, then looked at me, wide grins on their faces. I said what we all already knew.

"You guys planned this."

Drew stood up and came over to my bed. Both he and Anton climbed onto the mattress and descended on me.

"We're going to ravish your body," Drew said, then caught himself. "Only if you let us, of course."

"Please, Dr. Reynolds," Anton said. "You are a most attractive man. I would be honored."

His courtly tone made me chuckle.

"Far be it for me to turn down a Harvard man," I said. I pulled him toward me and got my first taste of his full, sensual lips. As we kissed I stroked his wiry hair, cropped close to his head. His smooth tongue slipped over mine as if they had been made to fit together. His breath was scented with scotch and garlic.

After that it was easy for Drew and Anton to relieve me of my clothes. Drew chuckled approvingly when he saw my own minimal underwear-I'd given up wearing boxers.

"Fucking hot," he said as he peeled the briefs down my thighs.

When all three of us were naked we flopped on the bed in a writhing tangle of limbs, mouths, and cocks. A part of my brain was aghast at what I was doing, but it didn't have the power to stop me.

My mouth enjoyed the novelty of having a choice of cock to suck. I did Anton's while jacking Drew's organ with my hand, then switched. A fleeting thought crossed my mind as I took Drew in my mouth that it would have been nice for us to be alone, but it was lost in the mounting frenzy of our lust.




The Halls of Academe Ch. 07



"Now it's our turn." They laid me out on my back, Drew sucking me while Anton straddled my chest and shoved his cock down my throat. Soon they changed places. I felt Drew lift my legs, and a minute later I was eating Anton's ass while being rimmed myself.


After a while Drew reached into the pocket of his discarded jeans and pulled out two condoms. He and Anton hooded themselves and I knew what was in store for me.

I lost track of how long my ass was filled with cock that night. Whenever Drew or Anton got tired or close to cumming they simply pulled out and let the other one take over. At the other end my mouth was constantly full of cock, ass, or tongue. My body was pulled and prodded into every conceivable position, except for one interlude when Anton fucked Drew as I watched. A strange tightness rose in my chest as I saw Drew's jaw go slack, his eyes glaze over as his partner's thick purplish shaft slid like a piston in and out of his stretched hole. I'd seen that look many times, only I'd been the cause. Just as the hurt got too sharp Drew turned to me.

"I need you up there too, Glenny. It's been too long."

Anton obligingly pulled out and let me take his place. Hooded with a third rubber, I took Drew on his back, joy and lust and anger all mixed together and exploding out of me through my driving pelvis. He smiled encouragement as his body shook under the force of my thrusts.

"C'mon baby, give me that tongue," he whispered as he pulled my face to his. My shouts of ecstasy were muffled by our kiss as I shot into his ass a few seconds later.

I was ready to collapse after that, but Drew and Anton hadn't cum yet and weren't even close. Their gleeful smiles told me what my punishment would be for jumping the gun. For the next twenty minutes or so their erotic assault never stopped. Finally while Drew was taking me on all fours from behind Anton finished me off by sliding underneath me and swallowing my aching cock whole. I raised my head and let out a long howl as I unloaded a second time that evening down his throat. I was dimly aware of hoarse grunts issuing from behind as Drew slammed into my butt, shooting his long-delayed load into me. As we started to come down from our sexual high Anton knelt in front of me and jacked off into my face. I closed my eyes and stuck out my tongue to catch what I could of the hot spurts.

The three of us lay side by side on the bed, drained and exhausted. Anton was the first to stir. He got up, wiped himself off and started to put his clothes on.

Drew said, "Going back?"

"Yes. I'm on a panel tomorrow morning at eight. Glenn, it was a pleasure." He leaned down and kissed me.

"I'll be there in a while," Drew said.

When the door closed behind him I turned to Drew. "Nice man."

"I told you."

"So I guess you and he are seeing each other now, right?"

Drew nodded. "Anton's totally cool about everything, as you can see."

"Yes, I guess we're just one big happy family." It came out sharper than I'd intended. To my surprise I found myself getting upset, but I wasn't sure why.

His eyes narrowed. "Is there a problem with what we did? Sure didn't seem like it." 

"The problem isn't Anton. It's you." I couldn't pretend that we'd just had some casual, no-strings sex. I'd convinced myself I was over Drew, but it seemed I wasn't.

"What do you mean by that?" There was a dangerous spark in his eye.

"You all obviously discussed this little party in advance. I just wish you'd discussed it with me as well."

"Oh, I get it." Drew's voice took on an indulgent tone. "C'mon, Glenn, if I'd asked you about having a three-way you'd have said no. You said at the lake last summer you'd never consider it."

I looked him in the eye. "I also said something else last summer. I said I loved you. Do you even remember?"

Drew reached out a conciliatory hand. "Of course I do. I'm trying to find a way to keep us in each other's lives. What do you want me to do, never have sex again? I'll bet you haven't been celibate either."

An image of Jason's face rose before me and quelled my attack, but only for a moment.

"So you thought introducing me to group sex was just the thing. That's been your approach from day one. The shock treatment. I've been your little project, right? Bring naive Glenn out from under the rock."

Drew turned away in disgust. "I don't believe this."

"I may not be a genius like you, Drew, but I'm not a total fool. I'm the best thing that ever happened to you and you can't even see it. You don't even have the guts to say you love me."

He turned back, eyes flashing. "It doesn't take guts. Most people say it far too often. Maybe I'm saving it for someone who'll appreciate it."

"Well, I congratulate the lucky man who finally drags it out of you." I turned away from him and pulled the covers up. "It's late and I'm tired. Tell Anton thanks for the Scotch. It was his, right?"

Drew got out of bed without a word, and I heard him pulling his clothes on. After the door slammed shut I heaved a sigh and closed my eyes. I lay there a long time before I got up and turned out the lights. It was even longer before sleep finally came.

There wasn't any occasion for me to see Drew and Anton again before I left, and I made no attempt to contact them. The few times we ran into each other at remaining conference events were short and awkward. On the morning of my departure I was sitting having breakfast in the hotel coffee shop. I felt someone pause by my shoulder. 

"May I join you?"

"Of course," I replied. Anton sat across from me and ordered a cup of coffee. We sat in silence for a few minutes before he spoke.

"Drew has been quite upset ever since the other night. I gather that you regret what happened." 

"It's not as simple as that, Anton. I think you could tell that I enjoyed it." I sighed. "I feel like Drew took advantage of our past relationship. He pushed me into something new without letting me think about the consequences." I shrugged. "But that's Drew's way."

Anton smiled. "He is a man of action, true. But I would be very distressed if you felt any ill will towards me. I agreed to Drew's wishes only because he assured me you would be pleased." He caught himself. "Please don't misunderstand. Of course, once I saw you I was very glad I had said yes."

I shook my head. "No offense taken. I'm glad we met. And I wish Drew and you the best."

Anton leaned toward me. "I don't know Drew nearly as well as you. But I do know that he cares for you a great deal." He got up. "I wish you safe travels, Glenn."

I thought about what Anton had said on the plane home. Whether or not it was true, I didn't see how he and I could do anything except drift further and further apart with time. We were on different paths through life. I should be grateful they had crossed, however briefly.

After my return the remaining weeks of the semester seemed to fly by. There were no more communications from Drew. I was hurt, but not as much as I would have been a few months before.

I found myself covertly eyeing attractive male students, and even faculty, more often at the gym. One idle evening I pulled up the home page of the local state U. and punched "Stedman" into the directory window. Sure enough, Jason's e-mail, office and home telephone numbers obligingly appeared.

After staring at them for a long time I closed the window without saving any of the information.

I asked Marcia about forming a search committee to fill Drew's vacated post. She gave me an odd look.

"Isn't he just on a year's leave of absence, Glenn? You're talking like he's never coming back." 

"C'mon, Marcia. Drew's on the faculty at one of the nation's major research universities now. He's not coming back to Steelman."

"You're probably right. Jon said the other day that he hasn't submitted an official resignation letter, though. He could wait until August to do that. Until he does, we really can't advertise the permanent position or do anything else about filling it. If worst comes to worst, I'd be in favor of asking Pat to stay on another year while we did the national search. She's worked out well, hasn't she?"

I told myself that my irritation was for the institution, that Drew was keeping Steelman dangling when he knew very well what his intentions were. I knew though that I was also taking it personally. Why couldn't he make the break and have done with it, so we could both move on?

It was final examination week of the spring semester, early May. The Texas spring had already given way to early summer weather, hot and sunny most days, alternating with occasional violent thunderstorms. On Wednesday morning I went early to school. Final papers for my upper-division seminar were due at noon. All morning I sat in the office as my students came by to drop their work off, most cheerful and relieved that they had finished the course, a few looking haggard with lack of sleep, pouring out tales of computer woes. At last they were all in--thankfully this time there was no one who had missed the deadline. I decided to walk home for lunch, then come back and start the arduous process of reading and grading them.

I had lived in the same small bungalow just a few blocks from campus ever since I came to teach at Steelman. As I turned onto my street and looked down toward my house I caught sight of someone sitting on the steps leading up to the front porch-a man dressed in jeans and a dress shirt, sleeves rolled up in the already intense heat.

My heart was racing even before he became aware of me and raised his head. As I broke first into a trot, then a run, the smile I still saw in my dreams flashed out in full splendor.

I skidded to a halt at the bottom of the steps, not daring to touch him or clasp him to me, for fear he might dissolve in my arms and reveal himself as a phantom, a figment of my longing imagination.

"Hey," Drew said.

I swallowed, then opened my mouth, but no words would come. Drew took matters into his own hands. He stepped up and embraced me. I felt the hard warmth of his body, breathed the fragrance of his cologne mixed with a slight hint of male sweat.

No doubt it was the shock of seeing him, but my first words were less than gracious. 

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Thought I'd surprise you," Drew said, with a slight smile. "How did you put it-the shock treatment." 

"I can't believe you even want to talk to me after the way I acted the last time." 

"What can I say, I'm a glutton for punishment," Drew said. I let go of him and climbed the steps. One small bag sat on the porch. I turned.

"That all you brought?"

"For now. Can I stay here tonight?"

Joy surged up in me, and to cover it I snorted. "You have to ask? Your toothbrush is still here."

We went inside and sat at my kitchen table. I still couldn't think of anything intelligent to say. 

"Well, this is quite a surprise. No one knew what your plans were. We haven't heard from you for so long."

"Yeah, well, I wasn't sure for a long time myself. Then once I did decide, things got really busy."

"Oh." I started talking fast. "I guess you need to get those things you put in storage. Have you seen Jon yet? I'm sure he'd appreciate seeing you once before you go. He-"

"Glenn." Drew raised a hand. "I'm explaining it badly. I do have an appointment with Jon today, yes. I want to make sure I can still have my position back. That was the deal and I hope it's still good."

He said it as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

"What?"

Drew nodded. "I'm supposed to see him at two. Hope you're free for lunch."

My brain was still trying to comprehend what he had uttered three sentences ago. I must have looked silly, my mouth wide open. Drew's smile was gleeful and embarrassed at the same time.

"The thing is, I had to vacate faculty housing up there once the term ended last week. You know I gave up the lease on my place here. I know this is all kind of sudden, Glenn, but-"

I was shaking all over.

"-I was hoping you'd let me stay with you, at least for a while. I know we haven't discussed any of this. Hell, I don't even know whether you want me back-"

"Stop." I rose and went around the table to where he was sitting. Drew turned to me. His eyes were shining with an emotion I'd never seen before.

"You're not going back?"

Drew shook his head. "They offered to make me a finalist for the tenure-track job, an inside candidate. I turned them down."

"But-what about your research? Your next book? Your career?"

He shrugged. "The state U.'s just down the road. They actually have a very good collection in my field. Anything else, I'll find on the Net. Travel."

Drew reached out and grasped my arm. "Glenn, I had everything I wanted there. Except you. And without you the rest didn't mean anything."

For the second time since I'd known him I knelt before Drew with no lascivious intent. I put my head in his lap, my arms around his knees, and burst into tears.

Drew leaned down and spoke softly into my ear, all the while stroking my hair.

"Glenny, please don't cry."

I shook my head, unable to stop. Minutes passed before I could compose myself. Slowly I raised myself off of him and sat on the kitchen floor, wiping my eyes. I shook my head in wonder.

"Every time I think I've gotten over you, you find a way to get to me."

Drew slid off the chair onto the floor and put his arms around me again.

"I thought a long time about what you said to me in Chicago. For a long time I was mad as hell at you. But then I realized you were right.

"You helped me without expecting anything in return. You let me go because you put my interests before yours. You did all that because you love me.

"I can't believe it's taken me this long to figure it out. Glenn, I love you too."

I started to cry again on his shoulder. "I don't deserve your love. I cheat on you, do stupid things."

Drew shook his head. "Let's not worry about what we deserve. Let's just treasure what we have-something unique. Something we should share." He paused, then said, "Anton really enjoyed meeting you this spring. He's very upset that I'm coming back here. I'd like to say to him he can come visit."

"Of course he can." When the time was right I'd tell him about Jason too. I wanted them to meet each other.

Drew bent and kissed away the tears on my cheeks. "We don't really need him for a while anyway, do we?" He kissed me again, harder, and a different kind of love surged up in my body. I shook my head in agreement as my arms went around him.

I woke up in the middle of the night, to the sound of rain pattering steadily on the roof. Drew was not in the bed. Anxiety instantly had me wide awake. I padded through the house, calling his name softly, trying to fight down panic. He was nowhere to be found.

I went into the living room, my heart pounding. Relief flooded through me. Through the front window I could see Drew standing on the porch, naked.

I hurried to the front door and flung it open. My lover turned toward me, his body catching the dim light, the shadows emphasizing the chiseled lines of his musculature, the curving majesty of the flaccid organ between his thighs. I drew my breath in at the beauty of the sight.

"Couldn't sleep," he said. "The air's so wonderful out here. Had to step out and enjoy it. Care to join me?"

"Jesus, Drew, the whole neighborhood's going to see."

Drew chuckled. "Glenn, it's three in the morning. I think we can risk it. C'mon."

I pushed the screen door open and stepped out onto the porch. The cool, moist air did feel wonderful on my skin. In the light from the street lamps we could see light rain falling while the moths circled. Drew embraced me from behind and nibbled my ear. My cock twitched at the memory of what we had done earlier that night.

"Mm, doesn't this feel nice?"

I nodded. "Let's hope Elden's not an insomniac."

"Who gives a shit about him. Anyway, I want us to move to a bigger place as soon as we can. It'll have to have a front porch, of course. And a bigger bedroom."

I turned to face him. His eyes shone in the dim light. "You're talking about our future together, Drew. You know what you're getting into?"

Drew smiled. "I know.

"You sure?" I persisted.

"I'm sure."

"In a few years you'll get tenure. Then a full professorship. Once that happens your course is set, Professor Ohlen. You're beholden to Steelman for the rest of your life. And to me, because I'm here for the duration. Are you ready for that kind of commitment?"

In answer Drew took my face in his hands.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

He kissed me then, long and deep. For one instant I worried again that someone might see us, then I dismissed the thought. I was through hiding from the world.

He let me go and walked to the edge of the porch, looking upward.

"Wow. Look at that."

I joined him, following his pointing finger with my eyes. Several blocks away we could see the tower of the Steelman main administration building, lit as it always was at night. The rain and mist softened its hard edges and gave it a glowing, unreal look.


The halls of academe could be harsh and forbidding to anyone who walked them. With someone you loved at your side, though, it wasn't so bad.

A breeze tickled our bare skin and I shivered. I got behind Drew and wrapped my arms around his torso, warming myself with the heat of his body. I couldn't resist taking hold of his cock, which stirred at my touch.

Drew turned his head and smiled. His lips sought mine out in a sidelong kiss. My own organ began to grow as I moved my hips gently against his backside.

"Let's go back to bed," he whispered. I nodded.

The rain began to fall harder. My partner took my hand and led me back toward the house. He pulled the screen door open and we went inside.

END