4 comments/ 14257 views/ 11 favorites Of Mice and Men Ch. 01 By: Gweall Alright Ladies and Gents.... we (well, mostly me... because I love this story! Lol!) wanted to post another infected story!!! It is a continuation, but can stand alone if you've never read 'Wing of Grey' or 'Things Change'. Hope you all love it as much as I do! We had so much fun working on this one :) Also, just because people seem to be getting confused, all the stories that have been and currently are being posted have been posted to the site before and posted to my (Gweall) personal blog. So if you're having a feeling of Deja vu, that's because you've probably read it before. I'll be sure to write a note to you all when it's a new story. See my author bio page for a link to my blog for all of my stories ready to read right now, or you can wait a month or two for them to be posted here. ~ Gweall and Naughty -------- "Get out!" Chris shouted. "Chris, please. Just give me another chance," Ethan begged. "No. Get out. I don't want you here anymore. I've tried to help you, but you've made it obvious you can't be changed. Mike was right about you," Chris shook his head, in tears. Ethan had tried his best to accept Anthony, and his differences, but he couldn't help his hatred for the infected. He didn't know where it came from, but it was there. Mike glared at him as Anthony held onto his side. They had been having dinner when Mike had brought up Alex. For some reason it sparked an old hatred for the mutants. He had gotten emotional and Anthony tried to comfort him. Ethan glared at the cat's paw on Mike's shoulder. His fingers were tipped with claws, and his tail swished back and forth gently. Ethan found himself watching Anthony's tail a lot. It just made him so angry. After that night, almost a month ago, he found himself falling back into his old way of thinking. He knew it would hurt Chris if he ever found out what Ethan was thinking, so he tried to hide it, tried to keep it bottled up. But that only made it worse. Now, a month later, things had reached their boiling point. He didn't know what set him off. Why it was tonight, and not any other night they had spent together. Because they were all such close friends, Ethan found himself alone with Anthony a lot. Sometimes Chris would be in the bathroom, and Mike would be out getting some beer, or something. He and Anthony would be alone. It was always kind of awkward, but they worked through it. But tonight had been different. Anthony was in a happy mood and was trying to spark up a conversation between him and Ethan, but Ethan didn't feel much like talking. "So how are things with Chris. I have to admit, you guys are really cute together," Anthony smiled. "Thanks," Ethan mumbled. "His birthday is coming up, right? Have any plans? Mike and I were thinking of throwing a surprise party for him," Anthony said. "I hadn't thought about it yet," Ethan said, not really participating in the one sided conversation. Anthony stared at him a moment, before trying again. "Maybe we could go to a theme park or something. Six flags or Disneyland," Anthony smiled. "That could be fun," Ethan said, not really interested. "Ethan... is something wrong? I know we're not exactly close, but you seem a little off lately," Anthony said. "No nothing is wrong," Ethan shook his head, lying. "Are you sure? I just think you seem kind of-" Anthony was silenced when Ethan hit him, sending him flying onto his back. "You don't know me you fucking infected piece of shit!" Ethan shouted suddenly. He didn't know where the blind fury had come from, but it completely filled his mind. He couldn't think about anything other than the creature that was so worthless in front of him. Anthony blocked his face as Ethan crawled on top of him, drawing his fist back. He punched him again, but before he could swing a third time, he was pulled off a bloody Anthony. "What the fuck!?" Mike shouted. He had Ethan by the waist and threw him onto Mike's bed. Chris knelt by Anthony, who had crawled over to the opposite wall. He held his nose, which gushed blood and Chris tried to stop the bleeding with a towel he had grabbed from the floor. "Ethan, what the hell are you doing?!" Chris shouted, looking up from Alex for only a second. Ethan's vision was beginning to clear, and it was like a red haze had been lifted from his mind. It took him a moment to realize what he had done. "What the fuck happened?!" Mike shouted, resisting the urge to help Anthony. He was more concerned with keeping Ethan far away from his beloved. "I- I don't know... we were talking... ow!" Anthony hissed, as Chris pressed on his nose. "Mike, I think it's broken," Chris said. Anthony was crying softly, in the arms of his friend. "I'm going to kill you, you piece of shit," Mike swore, before moving to Anthony's side. He rubbed his shoulders soothingly, before trying to help Anthony up. "Chris..." Ethan stood from where he had been thrown on the bed. "Get out!" Chris shouted. "Chris, please. Just give me another chance," Ethan begged. "No. Get out. I don't want you here anymore. I've tried to help you, but you've made it obvious you can't be changed. Mike was right about you," Chris shook his head, in tears. Mike glared at Ethan as they helped Anthony out of the dorms. Mike grabbed his keys. "Come on, we need to get him to the E.R," Mike said. Chris nodded, and they left. Ethan was left alone. He cursed and kicked the leg of the bed. His leaned against the wall and sighed. He had ruined it. He loved Chris, he really did. He just couldn't take the panther anymore. The cat had worn on his last nerve. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan stormed through the campus, angry as ever. Chris wouldn't answer his calls or texts, neither would Mike. It had been a few hours and Ethan didn't know what he would do. He couldn't go home, he didn't want to face Chris. Not after what he had done. 'He's kicked me out of my own Goddamn home!' Ethan thought to himself. 'He'll defend that stupid fuck of a cat until the end. He doesn't deserve it. He doesn't deserve Chris's love!' his mind screamed. His hands were shoved in his pocket and he frowned when his fingers hit something cold. He wrapped his hand around it and brought it out into the street light. It was his small pocket knife, shining in the light. The red haze began to return to his vision, cutting off any sense of reason or logical thought. He just needed to make somebody hurt. The boy had small horns on top of his head, curved back and around his ears like a ram. His legs were reversed and ended in black hooves that clicked loudly on the ground. He had lost track of time in the art studio and was heading back to his dorm. It was cold out that night, and it made his small tail twitch nervously. The night made him even more nervous. The campus wasn't exactly the most peaceful one out there, and he knew he should be careful. He tried to take the most lighted path, directly through the campus. His hooves echoed and he didn't like the sound, it made him feel alone. He smiled when he saw a figure walking ahead of him. It meant he wasn't alone. He quickened his pace, happy to see another person, even if he was heading the opposite way. The man's hands were shoved in the pockets of his jacket and he walked quickly, as if he had somewhere important to be. The ram hybrid slowly began losing his smile as he got an uneasy feeling in his stomach. He swallowed and looked around at the empty campus around him. Far away you could hear the heavy music of a party, but other than that the night was still. He shook his head, it was just a man who was cold and was in a hurry to get warm. There was no reason to be afraid. He often found himself thinking the worst of people when he was alone at night, and crossed paths with a stranger. It was just a stupid thing he did, tricking himself into thinking he was in danger. He smiled a little as he passed the man, who kept his head down as he walked past the infected. He shook his head and rolled his eyes. 'See, you freak yourself out over nothing!' he laughed at himself. His internal laugh was cut short when he felt a sharp pain in his back. He cried out, before falling to the ground. He was flipped over, and as he took his last breath he watched as the killer plunged the small pocket knife into his stomach, again and again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I would love nothing more than to sentence you to a few years in prison, Mr. Khan," the judge said, addressing Ethan. "I don't think that will help you all that much. You seem to have a history of prejudice against the infected," the judge stated. "I want to see if we can do something about that." "Like what, Your Honor?" Ethan asked. "You're going to spend the next six months doing court appointed volunteer work at a facility that was created to care for infected citizens," the judge replied. Ethan swallowed, how could this idiot actually think that was a good idea? "Thank you, Your Honor," Ethan's lawyer said. Ethan glared at him as he began packing his briefcase. "'Thank you, Your Honor' is all you have?" Ethan swore at him. "Hey, kid. You're lucky you're not in jail, that infected kid almost died," his lawyer returned. It was true, the poor ram hybrid he had stabbed was in the ICU. Ethan cursed as he left the courthouse. How was he supposed to spend the next six months in a big building with a bunch of infected scum running around? ~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan stared up at the tall gray building. It looked like someone had taken some plain apartment buildings that should have been torn down a long time ago, and slapped on some new gray paint. It looked hopeless and desolate. The inside was only a little better. The walls were a dull beige, and a few pictures hung from the walls. But all that was in the lobby was a desk, three chairs, and a plastic plant in the corner. "Hello, can I help you?" the blonde woman at the front asked him. "Uh. I'm Ethan, the court appointed worker. This is my first day here," he mumbled. "Oh! Okay!" she said, showing her bubbly self. She grabbed a stack of papers and set them down. "I just need you to sign these and then we're good to go!" she said. He quickly signed the papers, and then she walked out from behind the desk and headed down the hall. "Come on!" her high voice called out to him. He followed her lazily, just looking around the blank walls. "My name's Trish. I'm usually the one at the front desk, if I'm not there then it's Aaron. He's a really nice guy." she smiled. Ethan gave a fake smile back and then rolled his eyes once she turned back around to watch where she was walking. "So what exactly am I doing here? Mopping floors or something...?" he grumbled. "Oh no! Of course not!" she answered. "This program was started to help people who have been infected and don't have anywhere else to go. A lot of times, families were killed in the camps. Or the infected were so badly disabled they couldn't live on their own anymore. With no one else taking them in, that's what we do! Those who can afford it pay rent, those who can't... well... they don't," she shrugged. "It's a rough program, and we don't have a lot of money, but we do what we can. What we really need is people to go in and talk to them. A lot of them get lonely and just want a friend. Sometimes that's all they really need," she smiled. "Oh..." Ethan mumbled. "So. What we're going to do is set you up with a list of guests that you go and visit when you come here. You spend your time here with them and just keep them company," he smiled. "Oh..." Ethan repeated. "Some of them are a little grumpy, but..." she leaned in and whispered "I tried to give you the nice ones." She winked, and handed him a piece of paper. "Here are your guests. You spend as much time with them as you want, you just need to spend at least a half hour with each person, and then you're free to leave," she instructed. "Okay," Ethan said. He felt like he was just being thrown into this. He wondered if anyone had ever actually thought about what they were doing. Sending a guy who clearly hates infected to a place where he would be surrounded by them? Who's idea was that? "Here's your first guest," she said, stopping in front of an apartment. "Her name is Mrs. Fortune. She's on the older side and she really just likes to talk to someone. She gets lonely. So just listen and let her do what she wants. If she falls asleep before the half hour is over, you can just leave," Trish said, and left. Ethan stared at the door, before sighing and going inside. The room was dark. Only one lamp was on in the back corner of the apartment. An older woman sat in an overstuffed armchair, knitting. The entire thing seemed very stereotypical. She was in a plain flowered dress, and there were hand-made doilies and couch throws and pillow covers everywhere. It smelled like Ethan's grandmothers house. Mothballs and perfume. "Hello?" Ethan called out to the woman. "Didn't anyone ever teach you to knock, deary?" the old woman said, a strange after tone in her voice. "Oh... sorry," Ethan shut the door and apologized. Given the situation, it didn't even occur to him to knock. "Well, that's alright, I suppose. Just don't forget again," she scolded him, and then turned on another light. The old woman had the unfortunate luck to be hybridized with the exact opposite of what an old woman would be. Black feathers hung from her arms, and she had a fairly large feathered tail. When she stood up, and walked toward the kitchen, was when Ethan noticed large black talons where feet should be. She looked unbalanced and awkward. Ethan wondered, for a moment, how she had survived the transformation. He felt guilty, thinking about how the old woman should have died, but a little bit of that guilt was washed away when she squawked and shook the feathers on her long vulture neck. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan was bored to tears. He was beginning to get dizzy from the smell of the woman's heavy perfume, as well as getting itchy from the feathers that had landed almost everywhere. The entire place looked like a bird's cage. It didn't smell too far off from one either. The old woman, Mrs.Fortune, had spent the past twenty minutes talking about her son. After that, she spoke about knitting, and crocheting, and stitching, and sewing, and the different types of yarn, and needles, and threads, and everything else under the sun. Ethan thought he was going to kill himself. "Well, sorry, Mrs. Fortune, but our half hour is up." Ethan stood up, grabbing his jacket, which he had taken off since the small apartment was about 112 degrees. "R-really? Oh my, that went by so fast!" Mrs. Fortune mumbled, looking at the large cuckoo clock that hung from the wall. "Yeah it did, well I guess I'll see you next week." Ethan headed for the door, trying not to run. "What? But you come in every day!" she exclaimed, cheerily. Ethan stared at the door with shock before turning around. "W... what?" he stuttered. "Nobody told you, dear? Why, yes! You come visit us everyday!" She smiled, oblivious to the horror that Ethan was feeling. "Every... everyday," he sighed and fell against the door. "Uh... right. I'll see you... tomorrow," he mumbled, and left. ~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hi!" Trish greeted him at the lobby. "How did you like Mrs. Fortune?" "I have to come here every day!?" Ethan shouted. "Oh... yes... I-I assumed the judge told you," she mumbled. "He told me I had to come for six months! I didn't realize he meant every day for six months!" Ethan sighed and sat in a chair. "I know it probably takes a little while to get used to... but you will. I promise, some of them can be really nice." Trish walked around the desk to sit with him. After a moment of silence passed, she spoke up. "May I ask you about something?" she said quietly. "Sure, what?" Ethan looked up from where he had let his head fall into his hands. "Why did you hurt those boys? The infected ones. What did they do to you?" she asked. Ethan stared at her before answering. "I don't know. I just get so angry. I see them and I'm just so mad I can't think. I just... I hate them so much," he said quietly. "I don't understand," she said. A small silenced passed between them before Ethan spoke. "I don't either," he whispered. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Ethan spoke with Trish, he had to move on to his next room. The room belonged to a young woman who had been in the infected camps as a child. She would have been the same age as Alex if he were still alive. Ethan knocked softly, hoping she was asleep or something, but when a soft 'Yes?' floated through the wooden door, he sighed and pushed it open. "Mackenzie? Uh... I'm Ethan," he introduced himself. "Oh, hi! Trish told me you were coming," she stood up. Her hands were covered in sandy blonde fur, and it ran all the way up her arms and down below the neckline of her shirt. When she stood to greet Ethan he saw the sandy colored fur continued past her stomach and into the waist line of her jeans. Her face was now pushed out into a long snout. Her ears, also covered in sandy fur, hung down past her jaw and flopped in the air when she moved. Behind her, from a hole cut into the back of her jeans, was a thick wagging tail. She was a lab. Ethan had always liked dogs. But the most obvious thing about her, was that she was completely blind. Around her head, was a blindfold. The black cloth was wrapped tightly around her head so it wouldn't slip, but was loose enough so that it would be comfortable. "Hi." He shook her hand when she held it out, trying not to cringe at the paw in front of him. She smiled, before making her way back to the seat on the couch she had occupied. "So, tell me about yourself," she smiled. "Uh. Like what?" Ethan asked. "Why did you decide to volunteer here?" she turned her head slightly. Ethan swallowed. "They didn't tell you?" he frowned. "No. They just said someone new was working here," she shook her head, curious still. "Oh... I'm a court appointed worker," he replied. "I see..." she said, the question lying just under the two words, but not coming to the surface. "I'm here for attempted murder," Ethan said. "Oh my... seems like an odd punishment," she said. "It was a hate crime against an infected. I have a bit of a history..." Ethan wished he could see her eyes. Ethan counted to himself, it was now three hate crimes against infected. All in a couple of years. Of course he wasn't directly linked to Alex, but he didn't do anything to stop it. So he counted that against himself. "I understand... well, you answered my questions, so why don't I answer some of yours?" she asked. "What's with the blindfold?" Ethan asked bluntly. "I was in the camps when people first started getting sick. I lost both of my eyes there," she said. "I wear this because it's comfortable, and it helps to not creep people out." "Oh..." Ethan said. The conversation was forced and awkward for a while, but eventually they both began loosening up, and soon Ethan found he was forgetting she was even infected, until she got up to get a glass of water, and he saw the slowly wagging tail following her. Alone in the living room of the small apartment, he felt his anger begin to boil forward. His vision blurred as he felt the incredible rage fill him. It was unexplained and without cause, but it was definitely there. Mackenzie walked back out with the two glasses of water, and set them down on a table next to the couch before sitting down. "Something wrong?" she asked. "No. Just a little warm," Ethan lied. How would it look to the judge if he couldn't even handle a visit alone with an infected for half an hour? He looked at the clock, it had been twenty minutes. 'I'm not going to jail' Ethan thought to himself, watching the slowly ticking hands of the clock. He watched Mackenzie's mouth as she continued to talk about what they had been chatting about before. He couldn't remember what it was, it seemed so stupid now, whatever it was. Ethan's breath quickened as Mackenzie spoke. The drops of water rolled down the glass slowly, hitting the wooden table and lying there. The water looked so good, but he didn't want it. He didn't know why he didn't want it, but he really didn't. Mackenzie's dog-like lips moved as she laughed, her voice had long since faded away to Ethan. Now the only sounds were the ticking clock, and the dripping glass of water. In the back of his mind, Ethan knew the water didn't make any sound, but in his head it sounded like a waterfall. Of Mice and Men Ch. 01 He snapped out of his trance when the clock chimed once, signalling the half hour mark. He stood faster than he should have, and turned to leave. "Oh... I guess our time is..." Mackenzie was interrupted when Ethan slammed the door, "... up." ~~~~~~~~~~~ "How many more do I have?" Ethan asked, after he had finished the fourth infected. "Just one more, he's a real sweet one, very shy." Trish giggled, dropping her voice to a whisper she added, "don't tell the others, but he's my favorite." She winked. "Right," Ethan said. He had a throbbing headache and several knots in his neck and back from the stress of being around so many people he hated. The migraine seemed to worsen every time Trish laughed, which was about every three words. "Who's next?" he asked, just wanting to get this over with so he could go home and crawl into bed. "Carey," she smiled. "Carey? I thought you said it was a guy," Ethan frowned when she handed him the room key. "He is a guy," Trish frowned. "It's a unisex name," she stuck her nose up and returned to her computer. When Ethan was beginning to walk away, she called out. "Ethan!" He turned around with a roll of his large green eyes. "If you hurt him, jail won't be your biggest problem, k?" She laughed and winked, returning to work. Ethan raised an eyebrow, before heading towards the last room of the day. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ He knocked on the door, and at first he thought there wasn't an answer, but when he waited a second too long, he heard a very soft "You can come in..." He opened the door and looked inside the dimly lit apartment. After visiting the five infected rooms, he noticed that was one thing they all had in common. They all liked it dark. He stepped inside and for a long time he didn't see anything, it took a moment for his eyes to adjust and then he saw the figure in the corner. The man stood in the corner, nervously playing with something in his hands. He was fairly short, even across the room Ethan could see that the man was probably only 5' 4", give or take an inch. He was thin, whatever he was wearing clung to his lean body, showing off all of his small frame. In the pitch black of the room, Ethan thought he could make out a white long sleeve shirt, and some jeans. He didn't look like he was wearing shoes, only socks. The man had one foot on top of the other, moving his toes nervously. He lifted his right foot and used the top of his foot to scratch his left calf. He coughed nervously. "Sorry, I'll turn a light on, I bet it's pretty dark in here, huh?" he said, his voice very quiet and delicate. Ethan could hardly hear him. The man moved quickly, darting across the room to a wall. Ethan nearly lost sight of him, he moved so fast. There was a soft 'click' as the lights were turned on so that a normal person could see. The man had his back to Ethan and now he could see that he wasn't actually wearing a shirt. What he thought was a white shirt before, was actually a fair amount of white fur. The fur danced down his back, and moved all the way around to the front of his body, stopping just past his sides, leaving most of his chest and stomach with only pale skin. The fur continued down his arms, stopping just at his knuckles, leaving his palms bare. Ethan had been right about the pants. He wore a pair of blue jeans that hugged his small slender hips tightly. Even the small pants didn't fit him and he was forced to wear a belt. But again, Ethan found himself wrong about another aspect of the man's appearance. Covering his feet was more white fur, not socks. Sticking out from the back of the small blue jeans, was a long, long, tail. He held his tail nervously in his left hand, while his right still remained on the switch. Ethan swallowed when he saw the unusual sharp claws that decorated his fingertips. The man turned to face Ethan, who shivered at the sight of his beady black eyes, and the many long whiskers that protruded from just under his nose. Large round ears were pressed back against his head, a hint of fear and nervousness was given away by their placement. "Hi, you must be Ethan," his soft voice said again. Ethan almost couldn't believe how soft and delicate his voice was. He wondered if he had always been that soft spoken, or if it was new with the change. "Yeah," Ethan mumbled. "Carey, right?" he asked. The mouse hybrid nodded, his ears wiggling a little bit with the jerky movement. He walked over to a couch that sat nearby, and sat down. Ethan was weirded out by how little sound his tiny feet made on the hardwood floors of the small apartment. "Yeah... you can sit anywhere," he replied in his soft voice. He held his tail nervously, but his round ears were now up and on alert. Ethan sat down and stared at the mouse, the anger starting to bubble up from nowhere. Carey was the one to start the conversation between them. As the half hour got further and further along, Ethan was suddenly aware of how calm he felt. The small bubble of anger had vanished and Ethan found himself only a little uneasy. It was as if Carey had some calming affect on him. He didn't know what it was, and he didn't particularly care what it was. All he knew was that it was nice to have a break from the rage. ~~~~ TBC... Of Mice and Men Ch. 02 Ethan sighed as he dropped the milk into the fridge. It groaned and creaked as he closed the door. The apartment he had gotten when Chris had dumped him was only a step above a landfill. Everything was brown, except for the splattered of puke green paint that was strewn across the single bedroom single bathroom apartment. The previous tenant was lovely enough to decorate the place with the putrid color. He grabbed his cell phone, unplugging it from the only working wall socket in the apartment, and headed out. It had been a week since he had started working with the infected, though he hadn't been given the same bunch as his first day. He shrugged off the flood of emotions that filled him when he thought about Carey. The little mouse hybrid had touched him somewhere in his heart, somewhere no one ever had before. Not even Chris. The meek mannerisms, soft spoken voice, nervous twitches, and small smiles all added to the perfect package. Ethan couldn't help but want to see the man again. But at the same time, next to the want, was that smoldering hatred that lurked just below the surface. It wasn't as furious with Carey as it was with other infected scum, but it was always there. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Trish greeted him at the front desk as usual, and handed him a stack of files. He had gotten used to the routine, and after a bit of small talk, headed off to the infected he would be seeing today. As he walked towards the elevator, he opened the first file. The first one in his hands, was Carey. His first day there, Trish had just held his files and told him where to go. But now he got to see them. The picture of Carey in the file looked like it had been taken right after he had transformed. He was lying in a bed, strapped down with brown leather padded straps, his ears pressed back against his head. Several track marks were running up his arms, where he had been injected with something. He wore a plain gray set of scrubs. Ethan looked up as the elevator door opened, and he stepped inside before turning his eyes back down to the file. To the right of his picture was just general information. He was five foot three, he weighed 97 pounds, he had white fur, and black eyes. All of this Ethan already knew. He looked below the general info and found an interesting section. Medication. He scanned the small box filled with hand written notes. Xanax, Ambien, Zoloft. Ethan continued down, where there was a 'notes' section. In scribbled, uneven handwriting was written: 'Patient has severe Nosocomephobia, Latrophobia, and Trypanophobia. Patient should have frequent contact with people and other infected, to aid in the recovery of severe social anxiety. ' Ethan quickly pulled out his phone and googled the phobias on the first line. "Hospitals, doctors, and needles," he mumbled to himself. The doors opened and he found Carey's room quickly. He shoved his phone back into his pocket and closed the file, before knocking on the door. "Come in," came the soft call from the other side of the door. Ethan opened it, and was greeted with the sight of Carey sitting on the couch. He held his tail in his hands, as he did before, squeezing it nervously. He looked the same as he did the first time Ethan had met him, only this time he wore a pair of sweat pants. "Oh. Hi, Ethan." Carey smiled and Ethan could have sworn he could see a soft pink blush under the thin white fur on his cheeks. "Hey," Ethan smiled, he tried to ignore the softly glowing rage inside him. He sat down on the couch and there was a small silence that passed between them. "How are you?" Carey asked, tugging at his tail. "I'm alright, and you?" Ethan set the files down on the table. "I'm okay... I guess... is it too dark in here for you? I can turn some lights on..." Carey said, in his soft but nervous voice. He spoke so fast Ethan almost couldn't keep up. "No, it's fine, if you're more comfortable in the dark," Ethan said. It felt weird, asking if an infected was comfortable. Why did he care? "... I am... actually. But it's okay if you want me to-" "Carey, it's fine," Ethan chuckled. Carey blushed and sat back down, his white feet resting on the seat of the couch underneath him. He even sat like a mouse. "Sorry... I just get nervous," he bit his lip, and pulled his tail closer to him. He hugged it like a child would hug a stuffed bear. "Yeah, I saw in your file you have anxiety," Ethan said. Carey's ears laid flat against his head. "You read my file?" he whined nervously. "It's okay. That doesn't matter." Ethan dismissed it, he felt guilty that he had read the file now. Carey's eyes were glossy with unshed tears and he didn't want to see the small man cry. "I just get embarrassed. I wasn't like this before I changed, you know," Carey said, playing with the tip of his tail. "Really? I thought people's personalities didn't change that much when they got infected," Ethan asked. "They don't, usually. But... well... I wasn't infected like most people," Carey said. "What do you mean?" Ethan asked. "Well, I wasn't infected by chance. I was infected on purpose, against my will," Carey admitted. "What? How's that even possible? Nobody knows how people are infected, exactly," Ethan said. "That's not true," Carey said, his soft voice suddenly growing louder. "That's just a lie. They know," he said, returning to his original meek self. "Who knows?" Ethan asked. "Everyone. I mean, not 'everyone' exactly. The government kept it hidden from the general public. But they have scientists, lots of them. People who know how it works, and they're studying it," Carey explained. Ethan was beginning to think Carey wasn't exactly right in the head. "Right... and how would you know all of this?" Ethan asked. Carey bit his lip, before continuing. "That's why I was infected. I worked in a lab, as a scientist. When people began getting infected, it was our job to study it. Of course that was hard since we couldn't test on humans. After awhile, we figured out that it wasn't a virus or a bacteria or anything like that." Carey was growing excited as he spoke about his previous work. He scooted closer to Ethan and said in an excited whisper, "It's a parasite. A symbiotic relationship, actually," he added as an after thought. "A what?" Ethan frowned. He wasn't exactly the star science student back in high school. "It's like a parasite. Except they need each other. See, with a parasite and host, one always hurts the other. Parasites take from the host, harming it in the process. But with a symbiotic relationship, they need each other to survive. If one dies, so does the other," Carey said. "This was a major breakthrough. We knew what caused it, we could study it." Carey sighed. "But it wasn't enough. The government threatened to cut our funding if we didn't have something 'real' to show them," Carey rolled his eyes. "God damn politicians didn't know what the hell they were talking about," he mumbled, before snapping back to his story. "Anyways... they needed something 'real' to show for our work, otherwise it would all be over. So they were going to have to study an actual infected person, except that was illegal. But not if somebody volunteered," Carey said. "But you didn't volunteer," Ethan frowned. "They faked my signature. I 'signed' a contract saying that I agreed to anything they would do to me," Carey's voice was quiet and bitter. "They found a lab mouse that had the parasite, and kept us in the same room for a few weeks. The parasite lives in an animal host until it's old enough to find a permanent host. Then it moves to a human and attaches itself. After they're joined they can never be separated," Carey continued. "But they insisted that they would try to separate the two once they were joined." "What do you mean?" Ethan frowned. "Lets just say I wasn't the first person to 'volunteer'." Carey stared at Ethan silently for a moment, letting it sink in. "It only took them four times to realize that what they wanted was impossible. So they turned to trying different drugs and chemicals, seeing how they would an affect someone who was infected. That's what I went through," Carey said, his eyes glazed over as he went back in time. "I lost four years of my life in that lab. I never even got an apology." Carey's ears drooped and he looked at his tail. Ethan was quiet. The only sound in the room was the sound of Carey occasionally sniffing or wiping the tears off his cheeks. "I'm sorry, Carey," Ethan said. Carey looked up at him, black eyes still leaking tears. "You don't have anything to be sorry for." Carey shook his head. "I'm sorry that you had to go through that. I don't think you deserved it," Ethan said, and was surprised to see that it was the truth. He meant what he said. He didn't think Carey deserved to suffer. "Thank you." Carey gave a small smiled. He raised his left hand, which still held his tail, and wiped away the tears with the back of his hand. Carey took a deep breath, and let it out with a sigh. "Sorry." He laughed nervously as he dried the last of his tears. "It's okay," Ethan smiled. "So I told you my sob story, now what about yours?" Carey asked, in his mousey voice. "I don't have one," Ethan shook his head. "Oh come on." Carey laughed, as if he knew it was a lie. "You're a court appointed worker, aren't you? What did you do to get in here?" he asked, hugging his tail again. "Well... uh... it was an attempted murder charge," Ethan said. "Really? You don't look like a murderer," Carey said thoughtfully. Ethan looked at the ground. "Why did they send you here? Shouldn't you be in jail? No offense..." Carey said, his ears lying back against his head as he dipped his head down in embarrassment. "Yeah, I should be. But the judge didn't think it would help me. He wants me to change." "So he sent you here? I still don't get it..." Carey shook his head. "The attempted murder was against an infected guy," Ethan confessed. Carey's ears fell back again. "Oh..." he mumbled. "And... I've assaulted two other infected," Ethan added. Carey stared at him for a second. "Oh..." he repeated. There was an awkward silence as they thought about what Ethan had just said. The clock chimed on the half hour, and Ethan's time was up. He looked up at it before standing, he hadn't realized how long they had been talking. "I should go. I'll see you later, Carey." Ethan stood. "Bye, Ethan." Carey watched him leave, holding his tail and turning his head with curiosity as the man shut the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan spent the rest of his time there thinking about Carey. Sure, he had other infected to go see... he was with a child who was a crocodile hybrid, and an old man who was a hyena hybrid. But his mind was only focused on Carey. The story that the mouse hybrid had told him was a sad one. It made him think about what he had done to the ram boy, and Anthony, and even Alex. He had done horrible things, he had just never thought about them as being horrible before. He pretended to listen as he visited with the people, but he just couldn't focus. That look on Carey's face when Ethan told him why he was there. He couldn't tell if it was fear or what. No, it wasn't fear. It was something else. Concern? When Ethan was allowed to leave , he headed towards the elevator. Before he pushed the button, he stopped. He bit his lip and headed back the way he came. He stood in the plain looking hallway, lined with doors. But the only one he was focused on was Carey's. He hesitated, raising his hand to knock on the wooden door with the number 213 on it. He held his raised hand there for a moment, before letting it drop, and walking away. On the other side of the door, Carey's ears fell down to his head with sadness. With his tail in hand, he headed back to his couch to wait for Ethan's next visit. ---- TBC... Of Mice and Men Ch. 03 Ethan shut the door to his last infected, and headed towards the elevator. He headed down the hall and stopped when he was only a few steps away. He bit his lip, before turning back and heading towards Carey's room. Before he knew what he was doing, he knocked on the door. He heard a soft scurrying sound, smiling to himself a little, and the door opened a crack. "H-Hello?" Carey stuttered, poking a mousey black eye through the crack in the door. "Carey? Hey It's Ethan," he smiled. He was speaking softly like he was talking to a small animal. In a way, he supposed he was. "E-Ethan? I didn't know you were coming today, they usually tell me..." Carey looked nervous. "O-oh. Sorry." He opened the door and let Ethan step inside. He shut it, and Ethan couldn't help but notice the three locks that had been added to the door. Maybe they should have added agoraphobic to the phobia list. "Sorry, honestly I wasn't supposed to visit you today. I just wanted to check in on you," Ethan admitted, not knowing what he was saying. "O-oh. Okay," Carey smiled. As usual, he clutched his tail in his left hand down by his side. He played with the tip, absentmindedly moving it in circles with his thumb. His ears were lying flat against his head and the tiny claws on his bare feet clicked softly on the floor. "Can I, uh...Get you a drink?" Carey asked nervously. "Sure. Some water would be nice," Ethan replied. Carey nodded and disappeared into the kitchen. He returned shortly, a glass of ice water in his clawed hand. He put it on the coffee table in front of Ethan, and sat down. Awkwardness took over. Neither of them knew what to say. "Uh... so..." Ethan searched desperately for something to say, but his mind was blank. "I..." Carey spoke up suddenly, but the words died in his throat as he realized he didn't have anything to say either. Ethan bit his lip and, for the thousandth time that day, did something without thinking about it first. "That's a lot of locks," Ethan blurted. Carey glanced at the door and blushed. "Oh... yeah. It just makes me feel safer. I really don't like being out in the open," Carey whispered, nervously petting his tail. "Just my cross to bear, I guess. We all have them," Carey said, glancing up at Ethan. Suddenly, the slightly glowing anger that Ethan had been feeling since he knocked on the door flared. "And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" he snapped. Carey's ears fell back and his nose twitched. "I-I didn't mean anything by it," he said. "I was just saying that we all have our own problems," he added, in his soft voice. "And what's my problem, Carey? Huh!?" Ethan knew he was being stupid and irrational, but he couldn't stop. The blinding rage had taken over as he stood and towered over the cowering mouse boy. "I-I didn't mean... you don't have... I-I- I'm sorry." Tears were falling down his face. He had curled himself into a ball so tiny Ethan thought he would vanish. It was like he had been turned inside out. The anger that normally swirled inside his chest was now out for the world to see. But the caring man who wanted nothing but to soothe the other man's fears was locked away under the mean exterior. His heart hurt for the terrified man. But there was nothing he could do to help him. "Is this my problem, Carey? Huh?" Ethan easily tossed the coffee table onto its side before turning back to Carey. He continued to get in his face and yell, until suddenly the mouse pushed himself off the couch and ran clumsily into what Ethan assumed was his bedroom. He ran after him and hit a fist on the wooden door. "Open the fucking door!" he shouted, hitting it again. He could hear Carey crying quietly on the other side. As Ethan stood there, hitting the door in anger, he began to feel something. Slowly, the anger began to slip away. Soon, he stopped and just let his head rest against the door in silence. He could still hear Carey sobbing. "Carey? I'm sorry... I-... please come out," he said, in a gentle voice. There was no sound other than Carey's crying. Ethan sighed and sat on the couch. He had thrown the coffee table to the other side of the room, and now the glasses of water and the bowl of nuts Carey had been snacking on when he had arrived were scattered on the floor. Magazines were on the ground, and the couch cushions were askew from Carey kicking off of them when he headed for cover. He heard the door open quietly, but didn't move. After a minute, he looked over and saw Carey poking a tear stained head out. Neither of them said anything. Carey slowly came out of the room and stepped forward, in the safe space between the living room and his bedroom. He held his tail to his chest like a child would hold a stuffed animal. He looked worried, and the soft sprinkling of white fur on his face was matted down from tears. "I'm sorry. I'll clean this up," Ethan said quietly. He got down on his knees and began picking up the stacks of magazines. Carey watched for a minute, before getting down with him and picking up the pieces of glass from the cups Ethan had broken. "It's okay..." Carey whispered. His voice was shaking, as were his hands. "Careful, you're going to-" Ethan was interrupted by Carey's gasp of pain as a shard of glass cut through his hand. He dropped what pieces he had picked up and grasped his pale hand with pain, as blood began gushing from the wound. "Hurt yourself..." Ethan finished. He dropped the magazines and grabbed Carey's hand. The fur that covered the back of his hand, up to his knuckles, was the softest thing Ethan had ever felt. The warmth of Carey's hand made something happen inside him. It took him a moment to figure out what it was, but when he finally did he was shocked. The softness of the fur, and the warmth of another persons touch made his rage disappear. It came back quickly, but those few seconds were the most fantastic he had felt in a long time. He cleared his throat and looked up at Carey, who had frozen under Ethans gaze. "Do you have a first aid kit?" Ethan asked. He nodded. "It's in my bathroom," Carey stood up. Ethan held his shoulder as he picked up a couch cushion and put it back into place. "Sit down, I'll get it," Ethan said firmly, but kindly. Carey did as he was told and stared down at the stream of red blood that was dripping from his hand. Ethan stepped into the plain looking bedroom, and ran to the bathroom. It was kept clean and it was easy to find the white box. He headed back through the room and back to Carey. He did notice that his bedroom door had even more locks than the front door. He knelt down next to Carey and wiped away most of the blood with a piece of gauze. He grabbed the disinfectant and sprayed Carey's hand quickly. He gasped and tried to pull his hand back but Ethan kept held it firmly in his own. The small pout on Carey's face as he stared down at the wound on his hand made Ethan's heart beat faster, before he turned back to the task at hand. "Thank you," Carey said, when his hand was well bandaged and Ethan had finished cleaning up the living room for him. "It's no problem. It was my fault anyways," Ethan replied. "I forgive you," Carey said, a small smile crossing his face. Ethan smiled back. "Uh... I should probably go." Ethan headed towards the door. "Please stay!" Carey said. Ethan turned back and saw he was looking down at the carpet. His ears were lying back against his head and his tail was drooping down to the floor. That was the first time Ethan had seen his tail not in Carey's hands. He thought it looked longer when it was just lying around. Carey was biting his lip, and blushing so hard it showed through the thin layer of white fur. "I-... uh... I just mean... uhm... it's lunch time. Let me make you something to eat," Carey stuttered out. Ethan stared at him before looking back at the door. "Yeah, okay," he smiled. Carey stood and hurried off into the kitchen without saying anything else. Ethan followed him and smiled at the clean kitchen. Carey glanced at him out of the corner of his eye and reached for a plate on top of the microwave. He held out a hand to Ethan, where a medium sized chocolate brownie sat. "You bake?" Ethan laughed, and accepted the treat. Carey smiled. "I really like to cook and stuff. It's something I can enjoy without leaving the house..." he said. Ethan nodded and looked around as Carey made them some sandwiches, with a cold glass of iced tea to go with it. They sat at the table and ate quietly. "Have you ever seen anyone about your anger?" Carey asked, suddenly. Ethan looked up at him. Carey ducked his head and put his ears back, he fiddled with his tail under the table nervously. "No," Ethan answered. "Have you ever seen anyone about your phobias?" Carey looked up at him. "No," he said quietly. "You really should see somebody. It's strange for someone to get so angry like that so fast," Carey said. "What made you so angry?" he asked, wondering what he had done. "It wasn't your fault. I'm sorry. I just..." he sighed. "Whenever I'm around any infected I can't help but get so angry. I just... I hate them so much," he admitted, and then realized what exactly he had said. Carey looked down at his sandwich quietly. "I didn't mean it like that, Carey. I just... I don't want to hate them... you... I just... I don't know what causes it. I don't know why I get so mad." Ethan sighed and put his head in his hands. "That's what I'm talking about, Ethan. You should see someone about that. There are free support groups you can go to," Carey suggested. "What are you, some kind of doctor?" Ethan snapped bitterly. "Yes," Carey smiled. Ethan looked up, confused, and then laughed when he realized that Carey was, in fact, a doctor. They laughed together for a minute, before finally settling down. "That's what I studied in the labs, psychology. There's a lot of stuff that could lead to this kind of anger, and none of it's good," Carey warned. "I know... but I don't think I can go to one of those support things. I would be too nervous," Ethan said, and then his eyes lit up. "How about this... I'll go to an anger management group if you go with me, AND, go to a group that helps people deal with phobias," Ethan said. Carey's ears flew back as fast as they could, and he ducked his head nervously. "W-What? Oh, no.... I-I-I... I don't t-think... oh..." he moaned, worriedly. Ethan knew it was a fearful moan, but he couldn't help but find it attractive. "Come on, Carey. I'll be there with you. You won't be alone and no one is going to hurt you. You're in more danger here, with me, then you are out there," Ethan pointed out. Carey looked up at him and bit his lip. "Please, for me?" Ethan begged. Carey stared, his eyes wide with fear girdle the future. "Okay..." he said anyways. Ethan smiled and held back the cheer that was rising in his throat. It was only after he was leaving his unscheduled visit with Carey, that he realized he had agreed to go to an anger management group. He swore as he rode the elevator down to the first floor. He dropped his files on the desk in front of Trish. She eyed them as he headed toward the door. She glanced up at the clock and called after him. "Your required time was done an hour and a half ago," she pointed out. Ethan stopped at the door for a moment, before silently leaving. Trish watched with a smile on her face as he headed down the street, and away from the building that held the man who was slowly changing his life. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TBC... Of Mice and Men Ch. 04 Ethan smiled at Trish as he jogged to the elevator. "Where are you headed?" She sat up in her seat, looking confused and a little pleased. "I'm taking Carey to a support group for people who deal with phobias," Ethan smiled. "What? You convinced him to leave?" Trisha stood up, shocked. "Yeah, why?" Ethan stopped as she ran up to him, her heels tapping on the tile floor. "You don't understand. He hasn't left this place since he was released from the labs he was kept in," she said, jaw nearly touching the floor. "All the doctor visits, groceries, everything is delivered to him," she said. "So he really hasn't been outside in-" "2 years!" Trish giggled and jumped up and down. "This is a huge breakthrough! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!" She giggled as her blonde hair bounced around her shoulders. "Wow... well, wish me luck!" Ethan smiled, and pushed the button to call the elevator. He jogged down the hall and nearly laughed at how happy he was to spend the day with Carey, outside. He knocked quickly and waited, when he heard no reply, he frowned for the first time that day. "Carey? You there?" Of course he was there, Carey was always there. He poked his head inside and saw that the apartment was dark, as usual. "Carey?" he called out in a sing song voice, searching the dark living room with his eyes. When there was still no response, Ethan stepped inside. Everything was silent and empty as Ethan searched through the apartment. After searching every room and finding them all empty, he was beginning to get worried. He was about to head back downstairs when he heard a faint sound from somewhere within the apartment. He paused and listened. The sound floated to his ears, a sob. He looked around again, stopping in each room until he finally reached the bedroom where the sound was loudest. "Carey?" he whispered. There was another sob, a little louder this time. He rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall next to the closet door. He stood there for a second before knocking softly. "Carey... come on out," he said. There was no response other than another sob. Finally Ethan opened the door. Carey looked up, his wide black eyes reflecting the bedside light Ethan had turned on. Shirts and pants dangled above his head, brushing his large round white ears. His knees were tucked up against his chest, with his arms wrapped around them defensively. He sniffed again, his small nose twitching as he wiped away the tears that had matted the fur under his eyes. "Carey, come on, you can't be that scared," Ethan said, in a soft voice. "I'm sorry," Carey whispered. "Don't be sorry." Ethan sat down in the closet with him. "You just need to face your fears. If you don't, then you'll never be in control of your own life. Out of all the people I know, I would think you would want that control more than anyone else," Ethan said. "I do," Carey whispered. "But it's not that easy." He let out a big sigh as he cleaned up the rest of his tears. "Yes, it is," Ethan stated. "If you want something, you have to reach out and take it. If you feel something, act on it," Ethan urged, and was surprised when Carey let out a laugh. "What?" he frowned. "I think we could both use a lesson from each other. I need to do more taking and acting, and you should probably do a little less," he blushed and smiled a small smile. Ethan laughed. "Yeah, I suppose I should. Come on." He stood up, and pulled Carey up by his hands. Carey brushed himself off and played with his tail nervously. "Uh, you should probably put a shirt on," Ethan said. "And shoes," he added. "I don't like shirts... they feel weird on my fur." He brushed a small delicate hand across his lightly furred chest. Ethan felt his cock jump in his pants as Carey absentmindedly brushed his nipple. "Alright, I'm sure they'll be understanding about that," Ethan mumbled, looking Carey up and down again. "But what about shoes?" he asked. "I don't own any," Carey replied. "What? No shoes at all?" he asked. Carey shook his head. "They hurt my feet," he whined. "Plus I never leave the house, so..." he shrugged. Ethan sighed. "Okay, well I don't want you to hurt your feet, here." Ethan sat down on Carey's bed and tugged off the brown work boots he had on. He tossed them at Carey who slipped them on. They were way too big and he looked like a child playing in his father's shoes "Thanks," Carey muttered. Ethan smiled as he watched Carey clomp around in his shoes. "No problem," he held back the laugh. "We can go buy you some on the way," he suggested. "I don't have any money," Carey whispered. "The program pays for just enough food for me to get by and not much else," he clarified. "That's okay, I have some cash. If you don't mind wearing something from a thrift store," Ethan shrugged. Carey smiled. "No, that's okay... thank you," he whispered shyly. Ethan nodded and took his hand, leading him to the living room. He was already out the door and into the hallway and when he looked back. He saw a very pale Carey standing in the doorway, staring at the green carpeted floor of the apartment hallway. "Come on, Carey. I'm right here, you'll be fine," Ethan smiled. Carey bit his lip, and stepped out into the hallway. He kept his head down and walked with Ethan in silence as they headed for the elevator. By the time the large metal doors closed, Carey was an inch away from hyperventilating. "Carey, you gotta calm down. I know it's been a long time since you've been out of your apartment, but things have changed. Infected don't have to hide as much as they used to. People have gotten used to seeing them around, most don't even care about it anymore," Ethan said. "You care," Carey whispered. "Yeah, well... I'm a jerk. We're working on that tomorrow, right?" Ethan asked. They had agreed that Carey would go to his support group, and if he did as he was told, Ethan would see someone too. "If I survive the day," Carey mumbled. "You'll be okay." Ethan smiled, as the doors opened and they stepped out. Carey slid his hand into Ethan's for comfort as they walked across the tiled floor of the front room. Ethan's boots dangled from Carey's feet, making his steps echo loudly. "Oh my gosh! Carey, I'm so happy for you!" Trish greeted him and gave him a kiss on each cheek. Carey smiled queasily and refused to release Ethan's hand. The grip and the soft fur on his hand made Ethan's heart pound. He couldn't understand why he was feeling this way with Carey. He had loved Chris, he really had. But this was different. This was something else. Not lust and not love. He didn't know. "Ethan?" Carey tugged at his hand. Ethan blinked out of his thoughts, and smiled. "Come on, lets go." Ethan smiled wider and pulled Carey to the door. Carey took a deep breath, as if he was getting ready to dive into the ocean, and stepped outside. The bustling city around them made him dizzy at first, but he got his bearings quickly. In a few minutes, he was clinging to Ethan's side as they headed into an empty thrift store. Ethan helped him find a pair of shoes that fit, and that were relatively comfortable. Once he paid for the four dollar shoes, they headed to the community center where the support group was being held. "I don't know if I can do this," Carey hugged his tail tightly in his arms. Ethan smiled and Turned Carey to face him. He pushed his arms away so that his tail fell behind him, curving around his left side onto the ground. He forced Carey's arms to rest at his side, and before he could do anything about it, mused his hair so that it fell in a lazy fashion around his head. His ears were hidden in the unevenly cut mop of white hair on his head, but they still poked out. The round pink ears, covered in white fur, moved uneasily as Ethan bent to tie Carey's shoe as if he was a helpless child. "There, you look fine. You'll be fine. Just remember that no one is here to judge you," Ethan smiled. "Okay," Carey murmured. Ethan smiled, and pushed him ahead into the clean and newer looking building. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The room was easy enough to find. A printed sign on the door read 'Phobia Support Meeting'. Carey fiddled with his tail, before Ethan slapped the appendage from his hands. Carey pouted and then turned to the closed door. He took a deep breath before turning the knob. A few people mingled around the medium sized room. There was a fold out table against one wall with some coffee, water, and a pitcher of orange juice. Next to the drinks were trays of cookies and other snacks. No one had sat down in the large circle of chairs yet, but it looked like they were getting ready to. Everyone was grabbing their drinks and snacks, and heading to the seats. "Go ahead and sit anywhere you like," a tall man said, as he took a seat. "Come on," Ethan urged, and grabbed his hand. He pulled Carey over to the seat next to his. "Okay," he whispered, though he was already sitting down. In a minute or two, every seat was filled, and someone was looking for a few more for people who were standing around. Once they had accommodated everybody, the meeting began. "I'd just like to welcome everyone. I guess I'll start by introducing myself. My name's Paul. Why don't you go around introducing yourselves?" Paul said, gesturing to the man at his right. "Uh... Hi. I'm Steve." The man gave a weak wave, and then looked to the man to his right. "Gordon." "Alli." "Pam." "Sue." "Angelo." "Tom." Finally all the eyes landed on Carey. Ethan watched as his ears fell back against his skull and he reached for his tail. Ethan gently slapped his hand away, making Carey look up at him with fear in his eyes. He nodded, as everyone was waiting. "Uh... Carey," he whispered. "Ethan." Ethan nodded and waved. "Good, it's nice to meet you all. Now, just so I can get a feel for the room, who here is a supporter, and who here actually has a phobia?" Paul asked. Everyone was silent for a moment, so Ethan spoke up. "I'm a supporter," he said, nodding at Carey, who still looked petrified. "Me too," Sue said, and took Pam's hand. Everyone else remained silent. "Okay, well both of you are welcome, of course. And I'm to assume that everyone else here suffers from a phobia?" Paul asked, A few people nodded but most were silent. It was then that Ethan noticed Carey was the only infected in the group. It was obvious Carey noticed this as well, as his anxiety began to build. "I'm Achluophobic," Gordon said. "Fear of the dark," he added. Paul gave a small smile. "Thank you, Gordon, for getting the ball rolling. Anyone else?" Paul asked. "I have Eisoptrophobia. Fear of mirrors," Pam said. Ethan thought it was weird. She was very pretty with long blonde hair that fell in thick curls around her perfectly sculpted face. Her blue eyes sparkled happily, and her well manicured nails were wrapped in Sue's hand. "Uh, Gelotophobia... is uh... what I have..." Ali mumbled. Everyone seemed to be waiting for an explanation. "Fear of... uh... being laughed at." She ducked her head. "Well, you don't have to worry about that here," Paul smiled. "Kakorrhaphiophobia and Kainolophobia and Catagelophobia," Angelo muttered, with a thick accent. "I don't like new things. I'm afraid of doing something wrong or failing," he explained. Once again, all eyes turned to Carey. "Oh... uh..." he was beginning to hyperventilate. Ethan took his hand and gave him a reassuring look. Carey took a deep breath. "Uh, Latrophobia, Aichmophobia, Nosocomephobia," Carey said. "Doctors, needles, and hospitals," he whispered. "And some Agoraphobia," Ethan pointed out. "Oh, yeah." Carey blushed and reached for his tail, again. Ethan slapped his hand away for the millionth time that night. Carey shot him an angry look and Ethan silently mouthed the words, 'stop that'. He gave Carey and equally mean glare. Carey pouted and looked back at the ground. "Alright, that's okay," Paul smiled. "Everyone needs to understand that this is a safe space for all of us, no one is going to judge you here. You're going to be okay." Paul gave a reassuring smile. Ethan noticed Carey visibly relax a little bit. Just a little. The group talked for a long time. The meeting was supposed to be an hour long, but it ended up stretching to almost two hours. When they hit the hour mark, Paul quickly asked if anyone needed to go or if they wanted to continue since they were on such a roll. When everyone remained silent, the conversation Paul had interrupted picked up again. After almost two hours of everyone talking about everything under the sun, the group finally split. It was during the slow walk back to Carey's apartment that Ethan really saw the change in him. Instead of holding his tail, his hands were at his side and his tail brushed the ground gently behind him. He was smiling, and only glanced around nervously every few minutes instead of every four seconds like he had on the way there. "You seem to be a bit more comfortable out here," Ethan pointed out. "I am," Carey nodded. "I mean, I would still rather be inside my apartment. Nice... and safe..." he whispered, looking around. He snapped out of it and continued speaking. "But I'm with you and talking to those people really helped. I feel a lot better," Carey admitted. "Good. Do you want to go back again next week?" Ethan asked. Carey nodded. "This is the first time in a long time where I've felt like my fears don't control me. I feel so free!" Carey giggled, before covering his mouth with a clawed hand, and laughing more quietly this time. Ethan laughed. "See, I knew you could do it. You survived the night," Ethan winked. "Yup, and you know what that means," Carey said, in a sing song voice. Ethan groaned. "Ugh, I was hoping you forgot about my side of the deal," he mumbled. "It won't be so bad, Ethan. It really helped me, I'm sure it will help you too," Carey smiled. Ethan stared into his shining eyes and frowned for a second. "How old are you?" he asked out of nowhere. Carey looked taken aback, but recovered quickly. "Thirty. Why?" "Really? You don't look it," Ethan smiled. Carey smiled with him. "Really? Thank you." His blush showed through his white fur. "Well... to be honest..." he looked around as if someone was listening in. "I've been thirty for two years now," he giggled. "32 huh? You definitely don't seem like it." Ethan smiled to himself. "How old are you?" Carey asked. "Turn your age around," Ethan said. "What!?" Carey stopped walking. "No way in hell you're 23," he said. Ethan pouted. "How old do I look?" he frowned. "Well, it's not how you look. It's just... I don't know," Carey pouted. "God, you're so young." Carey put his head in his hands. "I am not," Ethan laughed. "Oh yes you are. Because if you're not young than that makes me old-." Ethan opened his mouth. "And you better not say a word about that or our friendship is over," Carey pointed at him. Ethan shut his mouth and smiled. "Now enough changing the subject. I'll see you tomorrow." Carey smiled, as they stopped in front of the building that housed hundreds of troubled infected. "Tomorrow... right. Are you sure you don't want me to walk you up?" Ethan asked. Carey looked up at the building, and sighed. "No, I want to try this for myself," he said. Ethan smiled. "Okay. Good luck," he said, as he began walking away. "Thanks," Carey smiled. Ethan turned and walked backwards, watching as Carey reached for the door handle. He stopped walking and paused. For a moment, his mind flashed to one of those cheesy movie scenes where the guy runs and gives his date a goodnight kiss, leaving her blushing and giggling. But only for a moment. He quickly snapped out of his trance, and left. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "This isn't a good idea, Carey," Ethan stated, as the bus hummed beneath them. Carey placed a clawed hand on Ethan's shoulder, making him twitch slightly, but he didn't seem to notice. "I didn't think yesterday was a good idea, either. But just trust me, okay? It helps," Carey said. He hadn't been quite as confident being outside as he had the night before, but it was still a small difference from the first time they had ventured into the outside world. He seemed to calm down a little when they got into the bus and sat down. Ethan supposed that it was just his mouse instincts kicking in, small spaces meant you were safer from predators. Carey could tell that Ethan was nervous. He could clearly see the fake 'macho guy' attitude just under the surface. Talking to somebody meant you were weak. At least that's how Ethan saw it. They finally arrived downtown. Carey didn't like the crowds that pushed and shoved down the street, but if it was for Ethan, it was worth it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan got more and more nervous as the visit with the therapist came closer. He was happy when he met Carey at his apartment. He was annoyed and slightly worried when they were on the bus. As they walked down the street he became more and more agitated. Now, sitting in the waiting room of the therapists office, he was down right pissed. "Come on, Carey. Lets just leave. This place looks like a dump anyways," he stood. Carey reached for his hand and pulled him back down into his seat. "Dr. Nelson is a good friend of mine. I spent my internship with her." When he saw Ethan was giving him a hard glare, he stopped. "Uh... never mind. Point is, you can trust her, she's a really good doctor," Carey said. "Right," Ethan mumbled. "Come on, at least do this for me. I agreed to the terms, now you have to hold up your end," Carey said. "Alright, alright," he snapped. Carey stared at him for a moment before lowering his head. He still felt uncomfortable making eye contact with people. He was beginning to wonder if he would ever get over his anxiety. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "No, this is bullshit!" Ethan said, as he slammed the door open to the therapy room. "Ethan!" Carey called after him, and then let his ears shrink back as the entire waiting room turned to stare at him. Of course the 'entire waiting room' consisted of no more than three people, including the secretary. "No, I'm not doing this!" he shouted, storming out the front door of the office. Dr. Nelson stood behind Carey as Ethan stomped out onto the sidewalk. Carey sighed and chased after him, apologizing to his friend as he left. "Ethan, what's wrong? You were just starting to open up!" Carey said, running to keep up with Ethan. He bumped people as he went, making him nervous and twitchy. "I don't want to open up. It's none of her business what's happened in my past," Ethan said, weaving through the crowds of people. "What's happened in your past that you don't want to talk about? Ethan, just talk to me!" Carey pleaded, as a tall man bumped into him, sending him towards the curb. "I don't know just... just be quiet!" Ethan covered his ears, as if trying to block Carey out. "Ethan, please. Just talk to me!" Carey begged. "Just shut up, Carey! Just shut the fuck up!" Ethan turned and shouted at him. He left Carey stunned, in the middle of the street. He turned, and walked in the opposite direction. Carey stood there for a second, wondering what had triggered the sudden anger in Ethan. But when he finally snapped out of his trance, he realized he was alone in the middle of a bustling downtown district. He froze, and felt as if every person was staring at him. In truth, no one even noticed the small mousy man in the middle of the sidewalk. But to him, the whole world had a spotlight focusing directly on him. He felt his chest draw in tight and he began to get dizzy as he started hyperventilating. He gasped for air and looked at the swarm of people around him. He whimpered and hugged the brick wall of a building. His heart pounded in his chest, echoing in his ears as he tried to block out the packs of people around him. He screamed bloody murder when he felt a firm hand grip his elbow. Of Mice and Men Ch. 04 "Carey, Carey!" Ethan shouted in his face. Carey opened his large eyes and stared up with fear. When he realized it was Ethan, he began sobbing. He buried his head in Ethan's chest and wrapped his arms around his wide shoulders. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry," Ethan apologized. Carey sniffed as Ethan pet his ears down against his head gently, trying to soothe the poor man. "I want to go home," Carey sobbed. "Okay, come on. I'll take you home," Ethan soothed. He felt terrible. Carey had started making progress for the first time in a long time and he had ruined it. Now the man was a wreck and was clinging to Ethan like a child who had gotten lost in the store. Ethan led him through the streets, keeping his head pressed into his chest. Carey refused to look up, no matter what. Ethan hailed a cab, even though he knew he couldn't really afford one. Carey was done, he wanted to be home now. As they shut the door to the cab, Carey finally began to calm down. His loud, rough sobs slowed to a constant sniffling and gasping. When the cab stopped, Ethan quickly grabbed his wallet and dug out enough cash to pay the driver. He grabbed Carey around the waist and pulled him into the building. Carey clung to him, burying his head in his shoulder. Ethan ignored the mildly angry and confused look from Trish, nearly carrying Carey to the elevator. The elevator ride was awkward. As the only sound in the machine was Carey's soft sobbing. Ethan rubbed his back, trying to comfort him to no avail. The elevator doors opened and Ethan pulled Carey to his door, and fished the keys out of his pocket. He unlocked the door for him and locked it, making sure he did every lock to make Carey more comfortable. Ethan turned to face Carey in the darkness of the apartment, and was surprised that he wasn't there. He searched through the black room quickly, and found no sign of the man. "Carey? Carey, where did you go?" He jogged towards the bedroom and found the door closed. He reached for the door knob and realized it was locked. He remembered the dozens of locks across the door and sighed, putting his head against the door. "Carey?" he sighed again. "Carey, I'm sorry." When there was no reply, not even a sob, he gave up. He set Carey's keys down on the coffee table, and took a seat on the couch. He stretched his legs out and fell asleep. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan was a heavy sleeper. A tornado could have hit and he still would have been snoring loud enough to wake the dead. But for some reason, the soft sound of a lock clicking woke him up. He looked over to the bedroom door and saw it hadn't opened, but it had been unlocked. He tossed his legs over the couch and let his eyes blink the sleep away. He stood up, and stretched. He walked quietly over to the door and paused, before giving it a soft knock. "Carey?" he called out softly, there was still no response. He opened the door and saw that the room was even darker than the rest of the apartment. He stepped inside and shut the door, heading for the closet first. He opened the closet door and found the small space empty. He checked the bathroom, shower, and even the cupboard under the sink. Maybe he had dreamt it all. He was about to leave, when he heard a soft sound. He didn't really know what it was, and it probably wouldn't have caught his attention if the entire apartment hadn't been absolutely silent. He got down on his knees, and looked under the bed. Two shining black eyes peered at him from underneath the bed. He thought for a moment how most people would be scared or unnerved by the beady black eyes, but he wasn't. Ethan found that they showed more emotion than plain ol' human eyes. "I'm sorry I left you alone, Carey. I was just freaked out, okay?" Ethan said. Carey remained silent, only staring at Ethan. Ethan frowned. It was as if Carey had actually turned into a full mouse. His eyes showed nothing but fear. Ethan sighed, before lying down, and rolling under the bed. He stayed there for a moment, lying with Carey in silence. Carey lay there, staring at the room out from under the bed. His head sat at an uncomfortable angle on the hard floor. "How about we get on top of the bed, you'll be more comfortable there," Ethan said gently. Carey didn't look at him, but stared down at the floor. "Okay," he responded, his voice a bit stronger than what Ethan expected. He crawled out from under the bed easily, leaving Ethan with a bit more trouble. Once Ethan finally wiggled out from under the bed, he saw Carey was already curled up and was watching him with his black eyes. He smiled and crawled into bed with Carey, who rested his head on Ethan's chest. Ethan stroked his ears lovingly as they laid in the dark. "Are you okay?" Ethan asked. "I thought I was getting better," Carey said, sadly. "You are, but you can't expect to be magically cured after one group session," Ethan said. "Things like this take time, Carey. You just have to give yourself a chance." Carey scoffed. "What, like how you gave yourself a chance today?" he snapped. Ethan was surprised at the hostility in the man's voice. "I-I'm sorry about that. You're right, I was being stupid and childish," Ethan admitted. "I just... I'm so sorry," Ethan apologized again. "I don't like talking to people about personal stuff," he mumbled. Carey stared at him for a long time. "What?" Ethan asked, after Carey had remained silent for nearly a minute. "Nothing. I'm tired. Will you stay with me tonight?" Carey asked. "Of course. Whatever you want," Ethan said. Carey had already crawled under the covers, but Ethan took the chance to kick his shoes off before he joined him. Carey ignored any personal bubbles Ethan might have had, and snuggled close to him. He was pressed tight up against Ethan's body, and listened closely to the sound of his heart beat. "Ethan?" Carey asked quietly. "Yeah?" he answered, already falling asleep. He knew it was very early. Their appointment had been at five and the drive back was only a half hour. But they were both so tired. "If you won't talk to a shrink, will you talk to me?" Carey said. "You're a shrink too, Carey," Ethan pointed out. "I'm different," Carey whispered. Ethan opened his eyes and stared at the man falling asleep in his arms. Carey hadn't opened his eyes while they spoke, but now he did, sensing Ethan watching him. His whiskers twitched on his face, Ethan thought they were cute. "Oh yeah?" he asked. Carey nodded. "You don't have to be scared of me," Carey promised. The words seemed funny, coming from the delicate man's mouth. "Yeah. I'll talk to you," Ethan caved in. "But not now, okay? I'm tired." "Okay," Carey whispered, and shut his eyes again. Ethan smiled as he pulled Carey closer. He knew they weren't together, but holding Carey, he couldn't help but want to be. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TBC... Of Mice and Men Ch. 05 Ethan's eyes fluttered open, and he was met with a wall of wall of white hair. Two round ears poked up out of the tussled patch of hair. Ethan smiled and kissed the back of Carey's head, making his ears twitch. He laughed, waking the smaller man. Carey turned around and stretched, yawning. "Morning," Ethan mumbled. "Good morning," Carey replied, voice laced with sleep. His tail was twisted between them, and they were both lying on it. He winced as he pulled it out from under Ethan's thighs and threw it behind him carelessly. "What's it feel like having a tail?" Ethan asked. "I don't know. It's not that weird. You get used to it." Carey shrugged. Ethan chuckled, and reached a hand up to stroke Carey's round ears. He smiled. "That feels good," he murmured. Ethan smiled and leaned forward, kissing Carey's soft lips. Carey blinked and smiled, before kissing Ethan back. "That felt good, too," he blushed. Ethan smiled. "Our first kiss, huh? I kind of like it," he kissed him again. Carey smiled and playfully pushed him away. "All this before breakfast?" Carey laughed. "Speaking of which, what do you want for breakfast?" Ethan asked, continuing to rub his ears. "Mmmm? Food?" he said, incoherently. "Yes. Food. Sustenance. Things you need to fuel your body." Ethan laughed, stretching his hands above his head. "Sorry, I don't think well when my ears are touched," Carey laughed. He sighed and looked at the clock. "It's early, we have time to go out if you want?" Carey asked, nervously. "That could be fun," Ethan said, before frowning. "Except for this whole deal." He pulled out his pockets, showing the very obvious lack of money. Carey reached over to the bedside table and grabbed his wallet. He opened the leather object and sighed. "I got a five. Breakfast at McDonalds?" he laughed. Ethan smiled. "Why don't we see what I can whip up here?" he said, reaching a hand out to touch Carey under the warm blankets. "Sounds good." He smiled, and reached a hand up to stroke Ethan's cheek. Ethan blinked, and roughly slapped Carey's hand away. Carey frowned and put his ears back sadly. "Sounds good," Ethan mumbled and crawled out of the bed. Carey followed him slowly, frowning at the sudden, but brief, burst of anger. "You promised to talk to me," Carey said. Ethan paused as he looked through the fridge, sighing. "Yeah. I did, and I will. Just... can we talk about this after breakfast?" He held up a half empty carton of eggs. Carey sat down silently. Ethan began making omelets, cutting up mushrooms, bell peppers, grating cheese, all in silence. Carey fumbled with the silverware in front of him. "Where did you learn to cook?" Carey asked, nonchalantly. "I was on my own a lot when I was growing up. And unlike most teenage boys, I'm a picky eater. So I learned how to make good food," Ethan laughed. "Alone a lot? Where were your parents?" Carey asked, trying to seem innocent. Ethan obviously saw through him and rolled his eyes with a sigh. "They were around. They had me when they were young and I think they always considered me a mistake. I never really cared for them either. I spent most of my time with my best friend," Ethan admitted, starting the fire for the hash browns he was making from a few potatoes he found. "Who was that?" Carey asked. "This guy named Mike. We were friends for a long time," he said, stirring the potatoes in the large pan. "Were?" Carey frowned. "Yeah... 'were'," Ethan mumbled, bitterly. "When we were in our last year of high school, this infected guy moved into town," Ethan started. "Alex." He got lost in space for a moment before he was brought back to reality when Carey cleared his throat. "I hated him. A lot. Mike fell in love with the guy," Ethan explained. "They were serious and he dropped me as a friend when I couldn't deal." "That must have been hard," Carey said, sadly. "I don't blame him for it. I was a jerk. I was so mean to Alex." Ethan looked sad. "This dickwad Randal was just a stupid bigot. I hated Alex, I won't lie about that. But Randal... he..." Ethan scowled down at the food. "He was just evil." "What happened?" Carey asked, trying to keep Ethan talking. "We kicked his ass. I'm not proud about it. But I was part of his torture. He left school, moved in with Mike. I just wanted to leave it alone. I was depressed and didn't have a friend anymore. Things were shit at home and I just wanted to forget about all of that crap. But Randal wasn't finished. He wanted more blood. He shot him," Ethan said the last part in a whisper. Carey looked shocked. "He died and Mike was just ruined. I felt so bad. He blamed me and he had every right to. I've never felt so bad about anything in my life," Ethan said. "Maybe that's it. You feel so guilty you just lash out at any infected in sight," Carey guessed. "The story doesn't end there. I apologized to Mike and he rejected me, again and again. But not long after that I really tried to figure out who I was. I experimented a little and realized I was gay. I chalked up all my horrible violence toward Alex as jealousy. I just charged back into Mike's life. He had found a new lover, Anthony. Really nice guy, another infected," Ethan said. "I fell in love with a friend of his, Chris. He had a thing for Mike but never acted on it because they were such good friends. I was doing so well, I didn't like Anthony by any means, but I dealt with him. Then, I just snapped one night and kicked the crap out of him. Chris left me, kicked me out of our place. I was wandering around, so angry at him and Anthony and Mike. I lashed out at the first infected I saw. This little ram hybrid. He was so small, he couldn't even put up a fight," Ethan finshed. He set the plates of hot food down and sat across from Carey. "Have you ever thought about finding the people you hurt? Apologizing? It might help," Carey suggested. "Alex is dead," Ethan reminded him. "But Anthony and the guy after that aren't. Right? Where is Anthony?" Carey asked. "I don't know. Probably still with Mike at the school," Ethan shrugged. "Okay, and the Ram?" he asked. "I don't know. Last I heard he was in bad shape, still in the hospital. But that was like three weeks ago." "Here," Carey said. Ethan had been so lost in his thoughts, he hadn't noticed Carey grab the small laptop from the living room. "This is from last week. It says he's still in the hospital and doctors think he'll be there for a few more weeks. Lets go," Carey stood up. "What? I just made breakfast." "We'll take it to go," Carey piled the omelets and potatoes on to two paper plates, and headed for the door. "Jeez, since when were you so eager to go outside," Ethan asked, pulling on his shoes as fast as he could. "Since it would help you," Carey winked. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Carey... I don't think this is a good idea," Ethan mumbled, as they walked up to the front desk. Carey clung to his arm, shaking a little from being outside. Ethan could tell he was nervous and was trying hard not to show it. "You would be surprised how much facing your fears help. You're scared of how guilty you feel about what you did. This will help. I promise." Carey smiled. Ethan nodded. He needed to learn to trust Carey if this was going to work. Carey spoke with the nurse, who gave Ethan a funny look while they talked. He tried to look around innocently, not drawing any attention to himself. "Come on," Carey smiled. "She actually let me in?" Ethan frowned. "I was just honest with her, I told her who you were, and that you wanted to apologize." Carey shrugged. "People are more caring than you give them credit for," Carey said. "Yeah. I guess they're not all as bad as me," Ethan whispered to himself. The door was open to the hospital room when they arrived. Carey knocked on the door frame softly. "Marcus?" he whispered. Ethan raised an eyebrow. He had never even known the kids name. The young hybrid resting in the bed turned his gaze to Carey, eyes ringed with black circles, the true sign of an insomniac. "My name is Carey," he spoke in a soft voice. He stepped into the room and approached the bed carefully. "You don't know me, but you know him." Carey stepped aside so Marcus could see Ethan. His eyes went wide and he opened his mouth with a terrified bleet. He squirmed in the bed, as if trying to move as far away from Ethan as possible. Ethan swallowed and felt tears brimming his eyes. He had made this poor boy so afraid. How could he make him so afraid? "No, no, no. Marcus, it's okay!" Carey said, trying to calm him down. "He's here to apologize. He just wants to say how sorry he is," Carey explained quickly. Marcus froze and looked back and forth between the two men in front of him. "Marcus? Uh... my name's Ethan," Ethan mumbled, not knowing what else to say. "L-like I g-give a f-f-fuck," Marcus stuttered out, visibly shaking. Ethan felt the bite of his words and tried to shake off the swear. "I'm sorry for what I did to you, Marcus. I really am. I was just so angry and I took it out on you. You didn't deserve that," Ethan said. He looked over to Carey, who nodded his head in reassurance. "I know that you probably won't forgive me. But I wanted to apologize. Just so you would know that I do feel sorry about what I did." Ethan looked down at his feet. Marcus refused to look at Ethan, and said nothing. "Thank you for your time, Marcus," Carey said quietly. "We'll let you get some rest." Carey gently led Ethan out of the room. "You're a monster," Marcus said quietly, just loud enough for them to hear as they stepped out. ~~~~~~~~~ "Yeah, that didn't really make me feel better," Ethan mumbled. "I know it's hard. But you'll feel better later. Just remember that you did your part, now it's up to Marcus. You did all you could," Carey said. "Where are we going?" Ethan asked, realizing they weren't headed home. "To face your other demons," Carey replied. Ethan saw the dorms a block away. "Oh no, no, no, no. No way am I going back there," Ethan stopped. "Ethan. This is important," Carey said sternly. "You said it yourself, Mike is a good guy. I think he'll see that you're trying to get help." "It's not just Mike. I'll have to face Tony, and Chris..." he said that last with even more hesitation. Carey swallowed. "Do you still have feelings for Chris?" he asked, asking more as a psychiatrist than a lover. Ethan looked at him. "The feelings I have for him are nothing compared to what I feel for you." Ethan wrapped his arms around Carey, making him smile and fold his ears back. "Lets get this over with," he rolled his eyes. Holding hands with Ethan, they stepped into the dorms. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ "The fuck?" Mike swore as he opened the door. "Who is it?" he heard Anthony call out. Poking his head out from behind Mike, sitting on the bed. "Just a rat," Mike said, glaring at Ethan. He finally noticed Carey and swallowed. "No offense," he mumbled. "None taken," Carey blushed. "Mike, I just came to-" "You shouldn't have come at all. Get the fuck out of here Ethan, before I kick your ass." Mike slammed the door. Ethan sighed and put his head down. Carey looked at him and then back at the door, before knocking for Ethan. He heard the faint sounds of Mike and Tony fighting, before the door opened. Bright yellow eyes peering out from the crack in the door. When he made sure it was who he thought it was, he opened the door the rest of the way. His long black tail poked out of his leather pants and swished back and forth nervously. The mouse inside Carey panicked, but he managed to get control. "Ethan." Anthony crossed his arms. "Tony... I came to-" "To cause more damage than you already have? Why don't you leave me alone already?" Mike said, pushing Anthony to the side, who glared at him with his cat-like eyes. "Mike!" Anthony growled at him. "You know what, this was a dumb idea, I'll just-" He turned to walk away and stopped when he came face to face with Chris. "Chris..." he whispered. Carey looked back and forth between the two and decided to break the tension. "You must be Chris, it's nice to meet you." He smiled at the twink in front of him. "I'm Carey." "Uh, hi," he mumbled. "Who the hell are you?" Mike asked Carey. "Mike, don't be a dick." Anthony slapped his chest. "Oh, uh... I'm Ethan's... uh..." he didn't know what to say. Boyfriend? Therapist? Punishment? D all of the above? "Boyfriend. He's my boyfriend," Ethan spoke up, so Carey wouldn't have to. Everyone's eyes got wide, and Carey's ears fell back against his head. "Not too point out the elephant in the room but..." Mike began. "You're dating an infected?" Chris yelled. Ethan swallowed, and pulled Carey close when he saw he began shaking. "Yeah, what's wrong with that?" Ethan asked. "Well... nothing. Except you kind of have a history of hating us," Anthony said, from behind Mike. "Hate is a loose word. More like despise." "Abuse," Chris offered. "Torture," Mike added. "Maim?" Anthony looked around, getting a few nods and shrugs from Chris and Mike. "Okay, I get it," Ethan snapped. "Come on, lets just go this was a stupid idea." Ethan tried to walk away but was surprised when Carey pulled him back. "No, you have to do this," Carey said, holding onto his hand. He sighed, and took a deep breath. "Anthony, I'm sorry I hit you. Chris, I'm sorry I disappointed you. Mike... I'm sorry about Alex," Ethan apologized. The three stared at him. Ethan turned back to Carey. "Can we go now?" he begged. Carey looked into his eyes and saw the sadness. He looked like a puppy that had been thrown out onto the street. It was obvious he really was sorry, and that he punished himself more than the court ever could. Carey nodded and followed Ethan as he walked down the hall. "Apology accepted," Anthony called out after him. Ethan looked up. Chris nodded and crossed his arms. "Yeah. It's alright," he mumbled. "No it's not. I still hate you," Mike shrugged. "Mike!" Anthony pushed him roughly. "Ow," Mike winced. "Pig-headed idiot," Anthony crossed his arms. Ethan couldn't help but smile. "This doesn't mean we're friends again," Mike clarified. "I know. I don't think I can ever get that back," Ethan said sadly. "You can't. But that doesn't mean we don't forgive you," Anthony said. Ethan nodded. "Thank you." Carey smiled at them, as they left. Ethan walked, slightly faster than normal. Carey grabbed his hand and spun him around to face him on the deserted sidewalk. "Are you okay?" he asked. Without a word, Ethan leaned in and kissed him. Carey savored the kiss and wrapped his arms around Ethan's neck. "I like it when you do that," he smiled. "I do, too." Ethan kissed him again, lightly. "Lets go home." Carey took his hand, and headed home. ~~~~~~~~~~~ "Feel better?" Carey asked, as they returned to his apartment. "Is it weird if I say yes?" Ethan asked. "Not at all," Carey smiled. "Me, however...." he sighed and sat down on the bed. Ethan saw him visibly shaking. "That was a long time to be out. Are you okay?" he asked. Carey nodded. "I think I'm finally getting a hold of this stuff," Carey said, taking a deep breath. "I'm tired though." He laughed it off, but Ethan could see the exhaustion in his eyes. "Me too, how about a nap?" Ethan asked. Carey nodded gratefully. "That sounds really good." He fell backwards into bed. Ethan laughed and kicked off his shoes, crawling in with him. But instead of falling asleep, Carey stared up at the ceiling. "You okay?" Ethan asked, noticing he was still awake. "Yeah," Carey whispered. "What are you thinking about?" he asked, sleep creeping into his voice. "Our kiss," Carey blushed. "You're a good kisser, much practice?" Ethan asked. "Not really..." Carey blushed harder. "I had a few boyfriends back in high school, but nothing too serious." "How serious did it get?" Ethan asked, hand sliding up Carey's waist. His breathing sped up and his ears fell back in a blush. "Uh... I've only... really had sex... a couple of times." Carey was distracted, as Ethan moved his hand back down and around to his round ass. "Uh huh?" he urged him on. "Uh..." Carey gasped as Ethan squeezed his ass firmly. "I dated a guy in college... he... was..." He sighed as Ethan slid his hand into Carey's pants. "He was my first. But we only slept together a couple of times before we broke up..." Carey admitted, in a rushed tone as Ethan slid his other hand around to Carey's ass. Carey was now resting on top of Ethan, his head buried in his neck. His hardening cock pressed against Ethans through the thin material of his pants. "W-what about you?" Carey asked. "No more talking," Ethan almost growled, and covered Carey's mouth with his own. Carey returned the kiss and before he knew it, Ethan was helping him tug off his pants, his shirt already thrown on the floor. He pulled Ethan's shirt off and in no time they were both naked, under the gaze of each other. Ethan let his hands run down Carey's slightly furred body. The white hair clung to his sides, and down to his hips. The fur stopped, mid thigh. His decent sized cock rested in a soft patch of white hair. Ethan reached down and stroked it a few times, enjoying the moan it coaxed out of Carey. He moved his hand back up, stroking Carey's ears as they kissed again. Carey let his own hands explore Ethan, running them up and down his chest and stomach. He moved them around to Ethan's back and played with the muscles there, enjoying the feel of him under his soft hands. "Is this too fast?" Ethan asked suddenly. "I don't want to pressure you, I just-" Without a word Carey reached over to the bedside table and pulled out a condom and some lube. Ethan smiled and gave him a questioning look. Carey blushed again. "I... uh... got them... the day I met you. You should have seen the look on the grocery delivery boys face when he dropped them off," Carey smiled evilly. "Look at you. I thought you were part mouse, not minx," Ethan laughed. Carey smiled and looked down at Ethan chest shyly. "Are you sure you want to go this far?" Ethan asked. Carey nodded, a little too excited. Ethan laughed and removed his hands from Carey's ass. When Carey looked at him questioningly, he nodded down at his hard cock. Carey blushed and smiled, slithering down Ethan's body, he opened the condom and rolled it on to Ethan's hard cock. While Carey was busy playing with Ethan, Ethan took the time to prep with his lover. He poured a fair amount of lube on his hands, and warmed it up with his fingers quickly, before using a finger to gently spread the lube in and around Carey's ass. He moaned as Ethan worked one, and then two fingers in and out of him. Ethan moved Carey, so that his back was on the bed, and positioned himself above him. "Are you ready?" he asked, nervously. Carey nodded, eyes glazed over with lust. He smiled as he lined up his cock with Carey's opening, and slowly pushed in. Carey gasped as he was filled with Ethan's length. Ethan bit his lip to keep from crying out as his cock was enveloped in Carey's warmth. Carey wiggled underneath him. "Are you okay?" he asked, through clenched teeth. Carey nodded. Ethan smiled and kissed him once more, before picking up a steady rhythm. Carey wrapped his legs around Ethan, forcing him deeper into him as they moved together. He threaded his hands into Ethan's hair, and ran them down his back. His small claws gently scrapped the tender skin on Ethans sides, making him shiver and moan. "Ethan... I... can't last much longer," Carey said, biting his bottom lip. "Me neither," Ethan said, out of breath. At Ethan's admission, Carey moaned as he began cumming. His cock sprayed a large amount of cum in bursts, across his chest and Ethan's. Ethan grunted as he filled the condom inside Carey's ass, loving the feeling of his boy writhing beneath him. He pulled out and tied off the condom, before collapsing next to Carey, who still panted as he curled up on Ethans stomach. Of Mice and Men Ch. 05 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Carey loved the feeling of Ethan's warm body next to his. It had been a long time since he had snuggled with anyone, and the feeling was great. The steady rise and fall of Ethan's chest lulled him to sleep quickly, but he didn't stay that way for long. After only a few minutes of dozing, he was woken up by Ethan's mumbling. He watched his once peaceful face as it twisted into one of fear. He whimpered quietly and tossed his head from side to side. Carey wanted to wake him up, and was about too, when Ethan began speaking. "Won't... I won't..." he mumbled, as he lifted his hands above his head. Carey frowned. "Ethan..." he whispered quietly. Ethan cried out and threw a hand over his eyes. He whimpered louder and louder. "Please... don't..." he said, gasping for air. "Ethan," Carey said louder, touching his shoulder. "Don't, please don't..." tears fell from his eyes as he sobbed in his sleep. "Ethan!" Carey had had enough. His shouting woke the other man with a start. Ethan sat up straight, tears falling from his eyes. He whimpered quietly and looked around. "What the hell were you dreaming about?" Carey asked, putting a hand on Ethan's back. "I-I don't know. It was dark..." Ethan mumbled. "I was walking home... I was younger. I think I was in high school. I... ugh..." Ethan held his head in his hand. "Are you okay?" Carey asked. "Yeah. My head just hurts," he said. Carey stood up and walked into the bathroom, returning with a cup of water and a few aspirin in hand. "Take these." He handed the pills to Ethan and he swallowed them with a drink of water. Carey took the glass and put it on the bedside table before sitting next to Ethan on the bed. "Do you want to talk about it?" he asked. "There's nothing to talk about," he turned onto his side, his back to Carey. "Why are you hiding from this. It's just a dream, isn't it?" Carey asked. "Just leave me alone," Ethan said. "Ethan, talk to me," Carey said. "Fuck off, Carey!" Ethan roughly shoved Carey, forcing him off the bed. Carey stared at him helplessly as Ethan tried to silence the sobs that wracked his body. "Ethan, what's wrong? You can talk to me. Not just as a shrink but as a friend... and more." Carey sat back down on the bed and rubbed Ethan's back soothingly. Ethan sobbed loudly. "I don't want to!" he said, like a child. "Why?" Carey asked. "I-I don't know, please just leave it alone," he whined. Carey stared at him silently and sighed. "Okay," he said, crawling into bed. It took him longer to fall asleep because Ethan's breathing wasn't so steady this time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ethan, come on, it's morning." Carey gently shook Ethan awake. His eyes fluttered open and he sighed as he sat up. "Feeling better?" Carey asked Ethan nodded a little, unconvincingly. "I just need a shower," Ethan mumbled and stood up. "Yeah, okay," Carey nodded. Ethan stood and walked to the bathroom. Carey listened as the water turned on. He moved to the kitchen, in the blackness of the apartment, to start breakfast. He had only just started the eggs, when he heard a loud thump from the bathroom. He looked up and frowned, listening for any other sound. "Ethan?" he called out. When he received no reply, he turned off the fire quickly and ran into the bathroom. "Ethan?" he called again, as he stepped into the warm bathroom. Ethan was crouched on the floor of the shower, sobbing into his knees. "Ethan! What's wrong!?" Carey ignored the hot water pouring down on them. His clothes and fur were soaked and he shrugged it all off and knelt down with Ethan. Ethan continued crying, not saying a word. "Please, talk to me," Carey begged. "I remember..." Ethan said, between sobs. "Remember what?" Carey asked, confused. "I know why I hate you so much. Not you... I..." Ethan grunted and held his head, as if he had a migraine. "Infected. I..." He sighed and shook his head, the tears mixing in with the water. "Come on, Ethan. Talk to me I can help you!" Carey begged. "I was raped!" he shouted, tired of Carey pestering him. He collapsed, even more than he already was. He drew in long deep breaths trying to get some air, but it seemed useless. Carey held him as he cried, not knowing what to say. "Ethan..." he began, but stopped. Nothing he could say would help. He let Ethan cry, until the water turned cold and his ears were lying down with the weight of the water. His long whiskers slouched, too. Finally, after nearly fifteen minutes of uncontrollable sobbing, he began to settle down. Carey reached up and turned the water off. He grabbed the towel Ethan had set out for himself on the counter, and wrapped him in the soft material. He dried him off quickly, and led him to the bed, ignoring his own soaked fur. After Ethan was passed out in bed, he grabbed the blow dryer and dried the sprinkling of white fur quickly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan woke up from his deep sleep still tired. He felt like the tiredness would never end. When Carey had woken him up in the middle of the night from his nightmare, he had denied it. He told himself it was only a dream, but somewhere inside him he knew that was a lie. When he tried to remember where the dream had come from, it only gave him headaches, and this sickening feeling in his stomach. He kept prying at the spot in his mind that clearly didn't want pried at. It had been the spray of the hot water, and that final scratch at that blank spot in his memory that had sparked the horrible events that took place that night. Carey stepped into the room, sighing. A long silenced passed between them before Carey spoke. "Do you want to talk about it?" Carey asked. Ethan nodded. Carey sat on the bed and put a hand on Ethan's shoulder. "It was right before my freshman year in high school. It was during summer break," Ethan began. "Mike and I had gone to the movies and he went home, he only lived like a block away. But I lived like half way across town. Since my parents were never around I had to walk everywhere." Ethan took a deep breath, and continued after he got a reassuring back rub from Carey. "It was really late, and it was raining. The streets were empty and I wasn't in the best part of town. But I was a cocky teenager and didn't think anyone would mess with me," Ethan mumbled. "It was just this one guy. He wasn't that big, but I was pretty small for my age," he explained. "He dragged me into an alley and covered my mouth. He just tore my clothes and used my shirt to gag me, using some duct tape to keep it in my mouth," Ethan said, spacing out as if he was back in the alley. "He didn't last very long. But I remember how his claws scratched me. I think he was an otter, or something? I don't know. All I remember is he had these long claws and these bright eyes that glowed in the moonlight. After he was finished he tore the tape off and told me that if I ever said anything he would kill me," Ethan said. "It's not like I was going to tell. I thought... I thought that nobody would take me seriously. I was just a kid it never even occurred to me that men could be... uh... raped, too." Ethan stumbled over the word, shivering when he finally spat it out. "You know that's not true now, though. Right? This doesn't make you any less of a man," Carey said. Ethan nodded, though it wasn't very convincing. Carey brushed his fingers through his hair, trying to soothe a worried looking Ethan. "I went home, and got into the shower," he continued. "I just scrubbed for hours and hours. The water got cold a long time before I finally stopped. I went through an entire bottle of body wash but I just couldn't get the feeling of him off of me." Ethan's voice quivered and tears fell down his cheeks. Carey soothed him as he cried for a moment, before pulling himself back together. He took another deep breath. "I threw my clothes in the dumpster, locked myself in my room, and went to sleep. I just ignored what happened. I never even thought of telling anyone. It just never crossed my mind. I just kept shoving it into the back of my mind and pretending like it never happened." Ethan shook his head. "God it just feels so weird. Like there was a puzzle piece missing from an otherwise complete puzzle, and now that piece has just been shoved back in there and you can see the whole picture." He held his head again. "You should really see someone, besides me I mean. I know it will be hard at first, but it's important. I don't know anything about this kind of thing, repressed memories and handling rape victims. But I know a few friends from school who will know how to help you," Carey said. Ethan nodded. "I think I can talk to somebody now. Before, I would just freak out whenever I got anywhere near the memory. I didn't know why, I just panicked," he sighed. "It's okay, Ethan. We're dealing with this now. This means you can finally move on with your life," Carey said, throwing a bit of happiness into the situation. Ethan smiled, but only a little. "I really want that," he said, crying from relief. "And you can have that. Just remember that it's going to take some time," Carey said. "Like you told me, you can't expect to get better after one breakthrough. But look at me now, I spent the whole day outside yesterday, and even met three new people," Carey smiled. Ethan smiled with him and nodded. "I'm proud of you for that, by the way," Ethan added, as his tears began drying. "Thank you. I'm proud of you, for facing this," Carey said. Ethan nodded, obviously unsure. ~~~~~~~~~~ "How was it?" Carey asked, as Ethan came back from his first therapy session. "It was... hard. There was a lot of crying, and all I'm gonna say is it wasn't from the shrink." He laughed, embarrassed. "But I feel like I'm finally getting control of my life," Ethan nodded. "We're a great couple, aren't we? An agoraphobic, anxiety-filled, rodent-man, and a rape victim with a temper like the incredible hulk." Carey smiled. Ethan sighed and laughed. "Yeah, we're not perfect. But I love you." Ethan kissed Carey. "I hope that's enough," Ethan hugged him tight. "I love you, too, and yes it is enough," Carey leaned into Ethan's embrace. "I think if we just give it some time, and put in a little effort, we'll get better and we'll have all the time in the world together," Ethan said. "It's good to see you so positive," Carey smiled. "Yeah, I guess. I just have a good feeling about this. About our future. A really good feeling," Ethan nodded. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TBC... Of Mice and Men Ch. 06 "Is that the last of it?" Carey asked, as Ethan set the box down. "Yep. I didn't have much, and that's all I wanted," he said, staring at their new house. Since he had started his therapy, he had gotten a job. It paid well, and wasn't too hard. Carey was looking, but he still had a hard time being outside for that long. But he had been making good progress. Since he no longer needed to be in the program for infected people, he had decided to move out. Trish wasn't happy about it, and made sure to threaten Ethan a few times before they left, but overall she was happy with the move. The small house was barely big enough for the two of them, but it was in good shape. Two bedrooms and two baths. They had yet to decide what the second bedroom would be, it wasn't like either of them had any guests to need a guest room. They had spent the last two days packing everything up, and walking it over to their new house (since they spent every last dime on the place). Ethan sighed and sat down. "Still feeling a little run down?" Carey asked, putting a hand on Ethan's forehead. "Yeah, I think I have a cold or something," he mumbled. "Why don't you go lay down and I'll make you some lunch, huh?" Carey smiled. Ethan smiled back, weakly. "That sounds awesome. Thanks, babe." Ethan kissed him, and then headed upstairs. They hadn't completely unpacked, but they made sure the bedroom was set up. He fell onto the bed, and was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. ~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan had been getting worse and worse. Carey took his temperature for the third time that day, watching it carefully to make sure it didn't get any higher. "Ethan, you have a temperature of 102," Carey said, worried. "It's just a cold," he mumbled, mind hazed with sickness and drugs. "This isn't just a cold, Ethan," Carey whispered. Ethan stared at him, curiously. "What do you think it is?" he asked. Carey shook his head and left the room. "Just get some rest," he threw over his shoulder as he left. Ethan felt like crap. He had for days now. He quickly filled the sheets with sweat as he twisted and turned, trying to get comfortable. He knew he should go to the hospital, but he didn't want to make Carey go. He knew the man was still terrified of doctors and hospitals. He didn't want to put him in that situation, especially since he hadn't really been in one since he was released from the lab. Carey returned shortly to wash away Ethan's sweat with a cool rag. His eyes were red and it was obvious he had been crying. Ethan took his hand. "What's wrong, babe?" Ethan asked. Carey looked down at the bed. "You won't go to the hospital because of me," Carey replied. Ethan swallowed. Apparently he wasn't very good at hiding his thoughts. "I don't want you to have to go somewhere you're scared of. Especially if you're not ready," Ethan said, voice filled with exhaustion. "You shouldn't put that off just for me," Carey mumbled. "What if you're really sick?" he asked. "I'm fine. It's just a little fever. Some NyQuil and it will go down." He leaned back against the pillows. "Ethan..." Carey said, worried. "If you're really worried, I can go to the hospital by myself," Ethan said. "And how would you get there?" Carey crossed his arms. Ethan hadn't thought about that. "I'll be fine, Carey. I just need to sleep a little," he mumbled, eyes heavy. "I'm really worried," Carey said, tears filling his eyes again. Ethan stroked his cheek. "I know, but don't be. I'll be-" Ethan was cut off mid sentence as he turned and vomited onto the floor. "Ethan!" Carey crawled onto the bed and held Ethan as he finished throwing up what little food Carey had forced him to eat. "I'm ok," he mumbled, as he wiped his mouth. Carey stroked his hair as he panted from exhaustion. "You're not okay," Carey replied, as he pulled the blankets over Ethan, trying to get him to sleep. But before he could settle in, Ethan shoved them off. "I'm cold," he mumbled. "Okay..." Carey whispered. "I...I need to go look at something real fast, I'll be right back." Carey jogged downstairs and rummaged through the unpacked boxes belonging to him. He pulled out an old, torn and stained folder. He leafed through it quickly, ignoring the several pictures of him on lab tables, passed out cold from drugs. "Symptoms..." he mumbled, as he found the page he was searching for. 'Subject experienced high fevers, followed by organ failure, and then finally his transformation set in. If not for the care of the facility, subject wouldn't have made it through the change.' The note was scribbled in sloppy doctors writing in a box labeled 'symptoms'. "Organ failure." Carey remembered the symptoms well. He had turned yellow, the result of his liver failing. His joints had been swollen and he could hardly keep any food down. He felt like he was dying, which he probably was. He set the folder down and jogged back up the steps quickly, watching over Ethan as he slept feverishly. His stomach was swollen, which Carey knew to be another sign of liver failure, and his skin was already taking of the faint yellow color Carey hadn't noticed before. "Fuck." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Carey?" Ethan mumbled, as the paramedics wheeled him into the ambulance. "Shhh... it'll be okay," Carey soothed, visibly shaking at all the medical equipment around him. "What are you doing?" he moaned, weakly fighting off the paramedics. "Stop. Ethan, you're sick you... you need to go to the hospital." Ethan was in no condition to take the news. "But you-" "You can't worry about me right now. You're really sick. We need to go now. I'll be waiting there for you," Carey said. "They probably won't let me see you, but just know I'll be there, okay?" Carey said, heart pounding in his chest at the thought of stepping foot in the hospital. Ethan was going to say something but passed out instead. Carey spent the next several days in the hospital. After the second day, he stopped jumping or cringing every time a member of the staff went by. By the third he was able to walk around without having a panic attack. As scared as he was, he refused to go home. He wanted to be there the second they let him see Ethan. "Can I see him, today?" Carey asked the same question every day, and everyday he was given the same answer. "Maybe tomorrow," the nurse responded, once again. Carey slouched in his seat and continued flipping through an outdated magazine that was meant to keep people busy. He sighed. They had told him he had been right in his assumption, Ethan was infected. But that was all they would tell him. As the nurse watched his face fall at the news he couldn't see his boyfriend, she took pity on him and glanced around. "Maybe, just a short visit," she winked. Carey jumped up and smiled, before hugging her roughly. She led him down the hall, and opened the door. Carey, from experience, knew what to expect. But it was still shocking. He was hooked up to many machines, all doing the jobs his organs should be doing. "Is he getting any better?" Carey asked. "Yes. As I'm sure you know, when his mutations begin to set in, his symptoms will begin to vanish. Until they're completely gone," the nurse explained. "I know," Carey said. "Some of his mutations have already started," she said, moving Ethan's hair aside to show two small bumps. "What are they?" he asked, brushing them with his fingers. "We're not really sure yet," she mumbled. "But he is growing some fur, so it's some sort of Mammal," she smiled. "I think you two will be cute together, whatever he is." Carey blushed. "Thank you," Carey said, as she led him out of the room. Saying his last goodbye to Ethan in a long time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Another week passed before Ethan was taken off of the many many machines. He had been getting some color back in his skin, and since the machines were gone, they let Carey sit with him through visiting hours. Each day sparked new changes, and it was becoming fairly clear what he was becoming. But none the less, the nurses took a fur sample (part of the ample amount of reddish-brown coat that had nearly covered his body) and tested him, coming up with a White Tailed Deer hybrid. Carey watched, as day by day his antlers grew, and his fur became thicker and more full. Soon, it was only the doctors and their drugs that were keeping him under that saving him from the pain of the transformation, which Carey still remembered all too well. "We were going to wake him up today. It seems his transformation is mostly done. He still has a fever, but that should disappear too, in the next few days," the doctor said, looking at a clipboard. "I usually have to give this big long speech to family and friends about how they're the same person blah blah blah, but you seem to have a hold of that aspect of it." The doctor smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a friendly way. "Yeah. I'm all set there." Carey squeezed his tail nervously. While Ethan had been out, he couldn't help but pick up the nervous habit again. "How long will it take for him to wake up?" "It shouldn't take long. We use a special drug for infected patients. Maybe half an hour or so?" the doctor guessed. Carey thanked him. "Oh and, I'm not sure what your transformation was like, but he's definitely going to need someone to be there for him," he said hesitantly. "I know. I'll be here for him." Carey placed a hand on Ethan's feverish one. "Good. I'll leave you two to it, then." He smiled, and hung the clipboard from the bed. "Thank you, Doctor," Carey replied. The doctor had been so nice to him over the past week. He had made sure Carey left and got food when he would forget to eat, he would let Carey stay in the room with Ethan a little past visiting hours, and made sure he got lots of rest. He was very nice. But for now, all Carey could do was wait. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan moaned as he began to wake up, tossing his head to the side. Carey was sure he still had a huge headache. He remembered how his head felt like it was going to cave in after he transformed. He couldn't imagine how painful those antlers must be. "Carey?" he moaned. "Ethan..." Carey stood from his seat and walked over to the bed. "Where am I?" he mumbled. "The hospital," Carey explained. He finally opened his eyes and stared at Carey. "Baby, you're in a hospital," he said, stunned. Carey nodded with a smile. "You needed me," he whispered. Ethan smiled. "I'm proud of you." He took Carey's hands in his. "What was wrong with me?" He turned his attention back to the reason he was in the hospital. "Well..." Carey pulled his chair closer to the bed and sat down. "What? Am I okay?" Ethan began to get worried. "Yes. yes! You're fine. You're not dying or anything," Carey laughed nervously. Ethan sighed and smiled. "All my limbs are intact, then?" he laughed. "Yep. All your limbs... and a few more," he mumbled the last part. "What?" Ethan frowned, thinking he hadn't heard him correctly. "Ethan, you know I'll always love you. This doesn't change anything," Carey said. Ethan stared at him. "What's wrong with me, Carey?" he asked. Carey swallowed. "There's nothing wrong with you," he answered, honestly. "You're lying to me. Carey why are you lying to me?" He began to panic. "What's wrong?" he asked, as Carey began to cry. "Ethan, please just calm down," Carey said, holding his hand tight. At the comforting presence of Carey's hand, he took a few deep breaths and began to calm down. "Carey, please, just tell me what's going on," he said. Carey took a deep breath. "You had a fever, and your organs started failing," Carey began. "I knew what it was, I just didn't think... fuck," Carey swore and put his head in his hands. "Carey, please..." Ethan begged. Carey took his hand, and slowly moved it up to the top of his head, letting him feel the medium sized velvet antlers growing from his skull. He went pale and tried to get out of the bed, landing on his new hooves. He nearly fell, being caught by Carey who could barely hold him up. Carey set him back in the bed. "Okay, okay. Just hold on." Carey, said and hurried to the bathroom, grabbing a small handheld mirror. He handed it to Ethan hesitantly. As soon as he saw his reflection, he began to cry. "Ethan, it's okay," Carey soothed, putting a hand on his back. "Don't touch me!" he snapped, and slapped Carey's hand away. Carey held his hand to his chest like he had been bitten. It didn't really hurt, not physically anyways. "This isn't happening. This is just a n-n-nightmare. I just need to wake up. Please wake up, please." Ethan slid deeper into the pillows. "I still love you," Carey whispered. "I don't want this! I can't be like this!" He held his ears, now longer and furred. "Why? There's nothing wrong with you, Ethan. I think you look great," he murmured, holding onto his tail. "Tail... tail!?" he sat up. His hooves kicking under the covers, using the bed to support himself as he turned and looked over his shoulder at the mirror, seeing the small tail dangling just above his ass. "Fuck... I have a tail, what the fuck?!" he screamed. He pulled the mirror back and chucked it at a wall, making Carey flinch. "Ethan please, just calm down. You shouldn't be exerting yourself," Carey said, afraid to approach his boyfriend. "God, this can't happen to me. I can't be like this. I'm disgusting." He held his antlers in his fists, tugging at the solid velvet covered growths. Carey stared at him silently. "Is that what you think?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest. "Do you think I'm disgusting?" Tears fell from his eyes. "I'm not talking about you, Carey!" Ethan shouted at him. "So what? Infected are okay, as long as you aren't one? Is that it?" Carey snapped. "It's all fine until they get too close to home, right?" he yelled. "Yes! Okay?! Yes! I have no problem with you or anyone else but I don't want any of this!" he shouted. "Fuck you, Ethan," Carey stormed out of the hospital room. He didn't feel like walking all the way home, so he grabbed a cab, throwing the cabbie a fair tip before walking inside the house. He had finished unpacking while Ethan was in the hospital, trying to keep himself busy when he couldn't sit with him in the room. He walked up to their room, and crawled into their bed. He stripped naked under the covers and curled up in the comfort of the pillows. Before he could even think about what had happened, he was asleep. He was woken a while later, by the sound of the bedroom door opening. He knew who it was instantly, by the soft sound of hooves clicking on the hardwood floors. Instead of looking up at Ethan, he stayed curled up in bed, pretending to be asleep. But Ethan knew otherwise. "I'm sorry, Carey. Please don't be mad at me," he whispered. "How did you know I was awake," he asked, bitterly. "I guess these new ears come with new hearing. It's kind of throwing me off," he mumbled. Carey turned onto his back in the bed and stared at Ethan in the doorway. "I'm sorry about what I said. It wasn't true." "Yes it was," Carey stated. That was what hurt the most. That he knew it was true, but neither of them wanted it to be. "Maybe. But I'll get over it," Ethan smiled. "This isn't funny, Ethan. This isn't something you just take a pill for and it goes away. You're going to be like this forever and if you can't-" his voice cracked as he took a deep breath. "If you can't learn to at least... at least accept it." Carey sighed. "I don't want to lose you," he admitted. "Lose me? Carey, what do you think I would do to myself?" he asked. Carey shook his head as the tears fell from his eyes. "I've known more than one infected who just couldn't handle it and-" he just sighed and gave up trying to talk. "Carey, listen to me." Ethan sat down on the bed. "I love you, and that's all I need. I can... I can learn to deal with this, if I have you." He smiled. Carey smiled back and hugged Ethan. "Do I have to sleep on the couch?" he pouted. Carey laughed and shook his head. "Good, I have no idea what these antlers would do to the upholstery." "Hey, watch those things. I could lose an eye," he laughed and kissed Ethan. "You really don't mind? All of this I mean." He looked down at his soft brown fur, with white fur covering his chest and the bottom of his tail. "No, I don't mind. In fact, I kind of like it." He brushed his fingers through the fur. "Your ears are soft." He touched Ethan's ears, making him moan. "Now I know why you like that so much," he sighed, leaning into Carey's touch. "I didn't think they would be soft," Carey touched the medium sized antlers on his head. "I wonder why you became a deer?" he asked, while trailing his hands over Ethan's body. "I went hunting with my dad once. Key word being once. I never was one for the 'sport'," Ethan mumbled, snuggling in with Carey. "Go figure, right?" "Ugh, hooves suck," he grumbled, kicking them under the covers. "You'll get used to them," he kissed Ethan gently. "I suppose," he yawned, as his eyes began to close. "They let you out of the hospital already?" Carey asked. "Yeah. They said since the symptoms fall away so fast, I was fine to go home," he mumbled, already falling asleep. "Good..." Carey mumbled. "I'm glad to have you home," he smiled to himself, as he drifted off to sleep. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Fuck!" Ethan swore, as he slipped for the thousandth time. "Okay, note to self, get carpeting." Carey handed him a cup of coffee. "Please," he mumbled. "We can go shopping today for some rugs until we can get the floors redone," Carey said. Ethan sighed. "It's just so weird to think of this as a long term thing." He accepted the steaming cup of coffee. "How did you handle this?" Ethan looked up at Carey. "My situation was a little bit different," Carey laughed. "I mean, I was kind of locked in a lab with a bunch of scientists poking and prodding me," he said. "Right..." he mumbled. "How do you deal with all the sounds? I don't know how good your hearing is compared to mine, but I have a massive headache," he groaned. "Here." Carey walked to a drawer in the kitchen, and pulled out earplugs. "Just wear them when it gets too much, I still have to use them sometimes," he smiled. Ethan shoved them into his ears and shrugged, thanking Carey. He sat down, and was silent for a long time before Carey noticed he was staring at his reflection in one of the glass cupboard doors. "Ethan?" he whispered, snapping Ethan out of his reverie. "Sorry, spaced out," he said, looking down at his coffee. "Are you okay? I know it can be a lot to take in... I... when I first changed..." Carey sat down and took a deep breath. "I got a hold of a scalpel and tried to cut off my tail." Carey grabbed the long extremity and showed Ethan a thick scar near the base. "They wrestled it away from me before I could do too much damage, but I've always regretted it. You really do get used to it, Ethan. Look on the bright side of things, okay?" Carey smiled, blinking his large innocent eyes. Ethan stared at him, before giving him a kiss. "Thank you for helping me through this. I'm sorry I fought with you," he said. Carey nodded. "It's okay. I knew you wouldn't take it that well, I was prepared." Carey smiled, sickly. Ethan stood and put his empty cup in the sink, but not before falling on his face on the way back to the table. "So... rugs?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After spending a LOT of cash on rugs, they managed to form a makeshift pathway throughout the whole house. He would still need to step on hardwood floors for some things, but to get around he was safe from the dreaded hardwood and tile flooring. "Better?" Carey asked, as Ethan walked around. Instead of his knees reversing, his ankles had grown slightly, to support his weight on his new hooves. Of Mice and Men Ch. 06 "Much," Ethan smiled. "Can I ask you something?" he asked. He seemed to be in a sour mood since they had returned home. Carey nodded. "How do you deal with all of the stares," he asked. To be honest, Carey hadn't noticed anyone staring, but after so long, he had learned to ignore it. It didn't even phase him anymore. "You kind of just forget about them," Carey said. "It helped when I met you, and you took me outside. Because I knew I had you, and you weren't staring." Carey leaned up against Ethan's chest. Since he had gotten out of the hospital the night before, he had taken to not wearing shirts, same as Carey. He agreed that it bothered the reddish-brown fur that covered his body. He had more fur than Carey, it covered his back and his arms all the way down to his hands where it finally thinned out. The brown fur continued around his shoulders and down his chest, stopping mid stomach, where it was replaced with the white fur that was the sure sign of a white tailed deer. His legs were covered for the most part too, stopping just above his hooves. "I'm definitely glad you don't stare. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you," Ethan held his hands. "You'll always have me." Carey kissed him. "Shit," he cursed suddenly. "We forgot dinner. And I don't wanna cook," Carey pouted. Ethan hesitated. "Then let's go out to eat," Ethan swallowed. "Are you sure? You won't be uncomfortable?" he asked. "No, I know this great chinese food place too," Ethan smiled. "Okay... if you're sure." Carey obviously wanted to go, but was concerned about Ethan. "I'm sure!" Ethan lied, and pushed him out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ The restaurant was mostly empty, which made both of them happy. "You know, we have to make friends eventually. We can't just be that weird couple who don't talk to anyone," Carey laughed. Ethan chuckled as they ordered, the waitress was a thin woman covered in black stripes and orange fur. "See, Infected people are everywhere. Like you said to me, things aren't how they used to be. People are a lot more accepting and tolerant of us now," Carey said, once the waitress had left. "Us. I have to admit it still sounds weird," he laughed. "You'll get used to it. I have to use the bathroom," Carey excused himself and found the bathroom on his own. On his way back, he was looking down at the carpet when he ran into somebody, falling backwards. "Oh... sorry," he mumbled, as a hand dropped down to help him up. "No problem, I wasn't paying attention either," the voice said. Carey looked up as he recognized it. "Mike..." he said, shocked. Mike frowned. "Have we met?" he asked. "Oh, it's the little mouse boy! With Ethan!" Tony poked his head out from behind his taller boyfriend. "Oh! Yeah... it's..." Mike snapped his fingers, trying to remember. "Carey, hi." He smiled. "What are you doing here?" Tony asked. "Ethan and I are here for dinner," Carey said, pointing to the only other person in the restaurant. "Where, I only see that infected-- holy shit it's Ethan." The last four words poured out of his mouth faster than Carey could understand him. Ethan still stared down at the mat showing the different chinese new year animals, so he hadn't seen them yet. "Oh, yeah. He just changed a few nights ago. He's still kind of shaken up about it," Carey said. Before anyone could say anything to Ethan, Carey added, "w-would you guys like to j-join us?" His stutter came out, as Chris showed up just in time to hear the news about Ethan. He was still nervous around people. "Well..." Mike hesitated, trying to think up an excuse. "Sure," Tony smiled. "Tony-" "Do me a favor Mike, and go get that little bag out of the car with your balls in it. I forgot it." Tony snapped, before walking over and sitting next to Ethan with a smile. "You got served." Chris rolled his eyes and walked over to the table, sitting across from Carey's spot. "You're welcome to join us too, Mike. He really has changed." Carey smiled nervously, before going to sit next to his smiling boyfriend. "-Exactly what you needed to get your head on straight." Carey caught the last of Tony's sentence as he sat down. Ethan laughed. "Yeah, it probably was. Carey was a big help too," he smiled as his boyfriend sat down. Carey smiled too. Everyone watched as Mike pulled over a chair at the end of their booth, sitting with a sigh. "Hey, Mike," Ethan smiled. Mike stared at him for a second before holding out his hand. "What's up man?" he smiled as Ethan took his hand in their 'secret handshake'. "Oh you know. Antlers," he pointed to his head, where his antlers had nearly doubled in size. Carey couldn't decide if he was happy to see his old friends, or nervous. Or both. "I see that. Look at that peach fuzz going on there." Mike reached up and played with the velvet covered antlers. "Hey," Ethan chuckled, swatting his hand away. "Hooves, too," Chris pointed out, under the table. "Well, you look like ten times less-ugly than you did before," Mike joked. Ethan laughed and hit him playfully, across the table. "Boys. Don't make me turn this restaurant around," Chris warned. The two ignored him, and Tony, as they tried to stop their mini war. Before anyone could do anything, Ethan filled a spoon with soy sauce, and flicked it at Mike. Instead of landing on his opponent, Carey's perfect white fur was stained with the liquid. Everyone went silent, biting their lips nervously, as the liquid dripped from his ears. "Oh it is on now," Carey gave an evil smile. ~~~~~~~~~~~ Ethan kissed his sleeping lover as he climbed over his body, mindful of his hooves, and headed into the bathroom. He yawned as he turned on the light and looked in the mirror. In the past month he had grown accustomed to his appearance. He had even begun to get used to his hooves. As he looked in the mirror, he noticed his antlers beginning to peel. He shrugged and stepped into the showers, hooves making a distinct noise on the shower floor. He turned the water on high as he began washing his chest and arms. He was washing his hair, moving up to his antlers, when he felt several scraps of velvet dangling from them. He scrubbed harder, and soon his antlers were only half covered in velvet. He looked at the hard bone that now replaced the soft velvet. "What's up with your antlers?" Carey asked, mouthful of toast as Ethan walked downstairs. "I don't know, is this normal?" he asked, picking off another chunk of velvet. "Google it," Carey offered. Ethan raised an eyebrow. "What? How else are you supposed to learn about your species?" Carey asked. "I'm a lab rat. I know everything about me. Google that shit," Carey shouted, pointing to his laptop. Ethan rolled his eyes and picked up the blue machine, turning it on and typing quickly. "Apparently it is. It says male deer shed their velvet and its replaced with the hard bone underneath, just before mating season," Ethan mumbled. "Huh. Come on, we're gonna be late," Carey said. "Where are we going again?" Ethan frowned, shutting the laptop. "Tony's birthday party. Mike threw him a surprise party, remember?" Carey said, "I already called a cab. Stop that," Carey slapped Ethan's hand away from his antler as he picked off the velvet. "It's annoying," he mumbled, and let his hands fall lazily to his sides. "You're annoying," Carey stuck his tongue out and ran, giggling, as Ethan chased him out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ The party was booming when they arrived. It was more than a small get together, the room was crowded with friends of Mike, Tony, and Chris. Friends from class and from the dorms gathered round and alcohol was in everyone's hands. Carey was forced to refuse a drink multiple times, from multiple people. Even Ethan had decided to stay sober so Carey wouldn't be left in the dark, though it did look fun. Ethan smiled as he convinced Carey to dance, bringing him to the middle of the bar's dance floor. The music throbbed in their ears, making Carey twitch when the music would hit a high whining note. But soon, the blush faded from his cheeks as he was swarmed by Ethan and the music. As Carey began to relax and have fun, more and more men began to take notice of his thin body. Mike had introduced them to the couple, but the names were long forgotten in a mix of alcohol and thumping music. Ethan watched as several men migrated closer to Carey, he felt his heart rate increase as they smiled at him with lust in their eyes. He glared, and pulled Carey closer. The anger boiling inside Ethan went unnoticed by the smaller man, who had long since drowned in the music of the bar. Ethan began to relax again, once Carey was close to him. But, it was short lived, as the men moved in closer once more. Ethan's anger sparked when he watched one of the men run his hand up Carey's side. Carey immediately stopped dancing, realizing it wasn't Ethan touching him. "Hey, you want to get out of here?" the man asked. "Oh, uh, sorry. I'm actually with-" Ethan interrupted Carey, by shoving the man who had touched him. "Back off!" he snapped, stepping in front of his white-furred boyfriend. "What the fuck?" the man swore, as he backed up. "Ethan!" Carey shouted, surprised at the sudden burst of anger. "What the hell are you doing?" Mike ran up, quickly recognizing the problem. Ethan refused to turn his glare from the man who had touched Carey's side. "Fuck you man, I don't see your name on him." The man stepped up to Ethan, ignoring Mike and Carey as they tried to separate the two. "Let's go, Carey," Ethan said, taking Carey's arm. "Ethan, what is wrong with you?" Carey asked, as Ethan dragged him out of the bar. "We're going home," Ethan grunted, not saying anything more. Luckily the bar they had chosen was only a block away from their home, and they were there in no time. Before Carey could even open the door and get a breath in to yell at Ethan, he was up against the wall as Ethan tore his clothes off. "I don't think so, if you think you're getting anything after what you just-" Carey was silenced as Ethan kissed him passionately. "Maybe just a little something," he mumbled, as Ethan continued to strip him. Before the front door was even closed, he hoisted Carey over his shoulder, and carried him into the bedroom. "What has gotten into you?" Carey laughed, as Ethan put him on the bed. He tore off his shirt, ripping off several buttons and enjoying the feeling of his fur being free of the confining cloth. Carey moaned as Ethan fell over him, and began biting and nibbling at his neck. With one large hand, he pinned Carey's wrists above his head, and used his other hand to begin to stroke his cock. Carey moaned as Ethan abandoned his cock and pushed his legs up to his shoulders. He sucked two fingers into his mouth, before shoving them roughly into Carey's ass. Carey gasped, as Ethan scissored his fingers quickly, stretching him open, before reaching over and grabbing the tube of lube they kept in the bedside table. He poured a large glob onto Carey's opening, and threw the tube aside. He spread it in and around his hole, before lubing up his cock with what was left. He lined up his cock, and pushed it in all in one thrust. Carey cried out as he was filled. His cock exploded over his chest, a few shots reaching his face. He moaned as Ethan began pumping in and out of his ass, hitting his prostate several times. Ethan nipped at Carey's neck harder, marking him with hickeys from his jaw to his shoulder. Carey was hard again in no time, but his orgasm was farther away now. As Ethan fucked him harder, the room was full of the slapping sound of sex. He grunted heavily over Carey, licking and sucking his chest and upper body. He used a hand to stroke Carey's cock. As Carey was building towards his second orgasm, Ethan was finally reaching his first. As he brutally pounded Carey's ass, he came. He bit down on Carey's shoulder, filling his ass with cum. As he felt Ethan fill him, Carey came again. Only a few shots of seed came out this time, but it was enough to cover his lower stomach. Ethan collapsed. He felt his stomach stick to Carey's as his cum sealed them together. Carey's legs fell around Ethan, as he collapsed in a crumpled heap under his lover. "Shit. Carey, I'm so sorry. I-I don't know what happened to me," Ethan said, through his gasps and pants. "Are you okay?" he asked. Carey nodded, mind numb and ass sore. "God that hurt," he murmured, as he stretched his back. "But I liked it." He blushed as he looked at his cum covered body. "Are you sure you're okay?" Ethan asked again, as he stumbled into the bathroom, legs weak and his head clouded. "Ethan, I'm okay. I'm not made of glass," Carey said, as he took the wet rag from Ethan and washed his boyfriends body lovingly. When he was done, Ethan took it from him and wiped the cum and lube from Carey. As he fell back into bed, exhausted, Carey rested his head on his chest, before either could say anything they were asleep. ~~~~~~~~~~~ "You went into rut," Carey said, as he continued to search online. "We probably should have finished reading that article last night," he chuckled. "Rut?" Ethan asked, sitting down at the table. "Yeah. It's mating season for bucks, basically. They fight each other for mates and when they finally get to them..." Carey stretched and sighed. "well, I think last night was a good example of that," Carey smiled, softly. A blush filled his face as he felt his cock hardening in his jeans at the thought about how rough Ethan had been the night before. It had been a long time since Carey had even thought about sex, before Ethan came along. Now he couldn't stop thinking about his lovers dick. "So uh... how long does this rut thing last?" Ethan smiled. Carey looked up. "Well, it's hard to say since, obviously, you're not a full deer. But their normal length is 1-3 months," Carey said, innocently. "Are you... still feeling the effects?" he asked, trying to keep the excitement from his voice. "Maybe just a little," Ethan said, as he felt his heart pick up speed. "This is going to be a long and pleasurable three months, isn't it?" Carey smiled at Ethan's wicked glare. "Very pleasurable," Ethan took him by the wrist and led him upstairs quickly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Early November came faster than either of them could realize. The three months Ethan spent in rut was both enjoyable, and miserable. He would still be pawing at Carey weakly, when they were spent from a long day of lovemaking. But the new side in Ethan, brought out a new side in Carey as well. As he became more comfortable with different things in the bedroom, he became more comfortable outside as well. After a blushing explanation from Carey, Mike and Tony had quickly forgiven Ethan for his sudden outburst at the party. In mid October, Ethan was no longer in rut. As he finally settled down from the three month long sexual high, his antlers fell off. He ran his fingers through his bare head. "I kinda miss them." Carey popped up behind him and wrapped his arms around Ethan's waist. "I think I do, too," he laughed. "They'll grow back," Carey ruffled Ethan's hair as he straightened his tie. "Man, you should dress up more often. You're hot," Ethan laughed as he turned and returned the favor, wrapping his arms around Carey. "Oh Jesus, I thought we were done with this," Carey laughed. "I may be out of rut, but that doesn't mean I don't find you sexy as hell." Ethan bit Carey's ear. Carey moaned and leaned back into his chest. They were interrupted by a knock on the door. "That would be Chris, he's giving us a ride," Carey smiled. "Ugh, I swear he's doing this just to spite me. What a buck-block," Ethan mumbled. "A buck-block? You're an idiot," Carey laughed, and shoved Ethan away playfully. He opened the door and greeted Chris. "Just a minute, Bambi over here has to find his other shoe." He rolled his eyes. Ethan stuck his tongue out at the two and disappeared to find the missing shoe. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "They're so cute together," Carey whispered to Ethan, who shushed him as the couple said their vows. Carey felt tears begin to fall. Ethan looked at him quickly, doing a double take. "I thought you said you weren't going to cry," he whispered, as Carey wiped his tears. "They're just so happy, look at them!" Carey pointed to Anthony and Mike as they slipped rings over each others fingers. "Well, maybe that will be us soon enough," Ethan smiled, taking Carey's hand. "You want to get married?" Carey said, hopefully. "Not right now, but maybe someday," Ethan said, and kissed Carey's temple. The crowd cheered as Mike and Tony kissed, sealing their vows and uniting them forever. People stood and clapped as the couple laughed and smiled, and the party really began. "I love you, Ethan," Carey said, as they made their way to the food and the dancing. "I love you, too." Ethan hugged him tight. "Come on, we need to take notes for when we get hitched," he winked, and dragged Carey into the crowd. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The End