19 comments/ 37654 views/ 82 favorites Now or Never: Escape to Freedom By: Now or Never: Escape to Freedom Six hours later when he reached the North Carolina border and decided to get out at the welcome center and stretch his legs. As he stepped out of the car he lit a cigarette and the smell of fresh air after a good rain greeted him. He soaked in the fresh aroma as he walked toward the main building and for a moment forgot that he was running away from an abusive, crazy boyfriend. Austin decided to buy a guide for I-95 from the magazine rack and figure out what he wanted to do for dinner. He finished up his cigarette and made his way back to the car to head back off down the high way. The exit he decided for the best restaurant was less than twenty miles away. He pulled off the exit ramp and on to the main road he took on the abundance of places to eat. There was everything from Lone Star to McDonalds. He finally decided to try a place called Hardee's, he'd never heard of them. He took his food over to a corner booth. Unbidden Eric came to mind; he pictured his reaction when he came home and found that he had run away. Guilt crashed into him. Eric was the only person he could rely on; he had taken care of him and sacrificed so much for him over the years. Austin brought his hand to his split lip that burned from the salt of the ketchup touching it. They had been good once, but all of the good was gone, he reminded himself. He finished his meal; dusk was starting to set in. Georgia was his new goal before he had to stop; the more miles between he and Eric the better. He had only been driving an hour when he ran into one of the negatives of the deep south; a powerful thunderstorm. He dropped his speed and accepted he would have to stop before he reached Georgia. The further he drove the worse the rain got and the more his nerves frayed. He rounded a bend and saw flashing lights. When he got closer it was a highway patrol car detouring people off of the highway due to an accident. Austin pulled off in a panic; he had no clue where to go. He figured that if he made a left and simply stayed south that he would see signs to get back on I-95. Unfortunately he saw no signs and soon Austin became horribly lost. He tried to turn around, but all the roads looked the same in the dark. Austin was on the verge of a panic attack when he saw a sign for Levy six miles ahead. When he saw the lights of the local bar called the Watering Hole he felt himself relax a bit. He decided it was a great place to stop, he needed a drink. He pulled up, it was an old country bar. Completely unlike like the ones he was used to in Philadelphia, but he needed to find his way back to the highway. When he entered the bar it was nearly empty. There were two guys off to the right playing pool in the pool room and about five others sitting at the bar. When Austin walked in everyone looked at him. He got the feeling that this was the type of town where everyone knew everyone and strangers were recognized immediately as such. He took a seat at the bar and the bartender walked over to him and smiled. "Hey there, I haven't seen you here before. What can I get for you?" Austin put the woman in her thirties; she was clad in a tee shirt and jeans. "I need to know how to get back to I-95 south." Austin replied trying to keep his voice down so as not to draw attention. "Well hunny, you'll make a left outta the parkin lot and then a left on Levy Road, that'll take you back to I-95." She said with a full wattage smile and a melodic southern accent. Her familiarity with him wasn't jarring; the bartender oozed an easy, comforting companionship. "Thank you very much." Austin hated how stilted he sounded given her friendly manner. "You're welcome hun. Do you want anything else before you go?" "Sure I'll take a Bud Lite, please." "Comin' right up." She located the bottle and twisted the cap off, placing the bottle down with a wink. Austin sat back, and soaked in the atmosphere of this little country bar. The few patrons conversed with one another and he listened as they spoke about their lives. It was easy to lose himself at the fringe of their world, feeling unfettered as he did, he was able to enjoy his beer for the first time in a very long time. When he looked up from the bar at the clock it was almost mid-night. He figured that he would ask the bar tender if she knew of any motels around. "Excuse me ma'am, I hate to bother you, but do you know of any motels around?" "Aw hun you're not botherin' me and by the way it's Shelly not ma'am. The only place around here is the local motel on Levy road. It's literally right around the corner. Would you like me to call them for you?" Shelly offered. "No you don't have to do that I'll just head right over there." Austin said as he got up from the bar stool, handing her the money for his beer and a tip. "Okay well you have a good night." Shelly said as she turned back to the other customers. Austin was in shock at how nice she had been to him. Mrs. Steinbach and now Shelly, two people looked at him and made him feel seen. He decided things were looking up, but when he got in his car and tried to start it nothing happened. No lights no dinging no nothing, so much for looking up; he didn't know this town or anyone around here. The only thing he could do was to go back inside and ask Shelly if there was an auto shop around. "Hey hun back so soon?" Shelly greeted him. "Yeah, I'm sorry but my car won't start and I was wondering if you knew of an auto shop around?" Austin asked. "Mike's garage is right across the street but he doesn't open till eight." "Okay thanks again, you said the hotel is right around the corner?" "Sure is. Would you like me to call there? I'm sure they could come and get you." Shelly said as she started wiping down the bar. "No thank you. I only have one suitcase and it's doesn't sound like a far walk." Austin said as he walked out the door. He grabbed his suitcase from the trunk and the pack of smokes from the glove box and started toward Levy Road. Shelly was right the motel was right around the corner. It was a rustic motel with a neon green vacancy sign. From the outside it didn't look like anything special. It was a single level motel with what looked like a house in the middle, where he guessed the owners lived. He approached the office it looked as if the place was closed, but as he walked to the glass double doors the light inside came on and an elderly woman appeared. "Good evening young man, how can I help you?" "Evening ma'am, I would like one room please." "Okay. That'll be thirty five dollars and check out time is three." The woman said as she turned toward the key board. "Would you like a receipt?" she asked as she handed him a key to room 5. "No thank you ma'am." Austin said as he put the key in his pocket. "If you need anything feel free to ring this bell." "Thank you very much and have a good night." Austin said as he turned and exited the office. When he opened the door to his room he noticed that it wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. There was a queen sized bed on the wall and a table with two chairs by the plate glass window. After he set his suitcase down he took a long shower remaining under the spray for nearly an hour. He did not have to rush; there was no list of Eric's demands to complete. He was proud of himself for getting so far; he had faced his fears and not turned back. He climbed into bed tired but still to wound up to sleep. He turned on the TV and channel surfed until he came on a marathon of his favorite show, Three's Company. Austin watched a few episodes before sleep finally took over him. He did not have a peaceful night's sleep. He was wracked with one nightmare after another. The worst one came right before dawn, he dreamt that Eric had found him, beaten him and had taken him back to New Jersey to live the rest of his life as his personal slave. Austin heard a knocking, in his dream he was pounding the walls begging for freedom, but the sounds eventually drew him out of slumber. He got out of bed and stumbled over to the door, for a moment he forgot he was in a motel. "Who is it?" Austin asked as fear started to set in. "It's Mrs. Miller from the office." "Okay just a second please." Austin said as he scrambled to put on a t-shirt. "Good morning Mrs. Miller, how are you?" Austin said as he opened the door. "I'm doing just fine, thanks for asking. I wanted you to know that Shelly called and said that Mike is looking at your car first thing this morning. You can go over and see him in an hour or so." "Oh thank you. She didn't have to do that for me." Austin said shock evident in his voice. "That's how Shelly is. Takes things right into her heart, it's a wonder it's not filled up with all she carries with her. I'm going to head back to my daily chores, but is there anything you need before I go." Mrs. Miller said. "I'm good, thank you." Austin said. "If you need clean sheets or towels just let me know. I don't go into a guest's room unless they ask me to." She said as she turned and headed back toward the office. "Oh do you know where I can get a cup of coffee?" Austin asked her. "Sure do. There'll be a fresh pot in the office in about 10 minutes you get dressed and I'll have a cup with you." Mrs. Miller smiled. When Austin went into the bathroom he got a good look at his face for the first time. The swelling in his lip and eye had gone down but they were purple and red, Austin got dressed and grabbed a fresh pack of Maverick menthol smokes from his bag and headed toward the office. When he arrived at the office Mrs. Miller had a jumbo cup with cream and sugar waiting for him. He poured himself some coffee and put in his cream and sugar. He noticed a nice picnic table out front of the office and thought that would be a nice place to have a morning smoke and coffee. He sat at the table and took that first mornings drag, he felt the warm southern sun shining down on him, and he loved it. The sky was a bright blue and the clouds looked like jumbo cotton balls. "Here ya go, I hope you're hungry." Mrs. Miller said as she set down a huge plate of food. "You didn't have to make this for me." Austin said as he looked at the great helping of scrambled eggs, toast, grits and sausage. "I know but you look way to thin when you opened the door. The least I can do is give you some filling food and put a little meat on your bones." Mrs. Miller said as she sat down across from him. "Where are you coming from?" "I'm heading down to Florida from New Jersey to visit my grandparents." Austin said as he took a bite of the sausage. "Florida is nice this time of year. How long are you going for?" She asked as she took a sip of her coffee. "I'm not really sure. I'm kinda trying to start over." Austin said as he finished his toast. He was hesitant to tell her more, he been isolated for so long even if freedom felt nice it was still unfamiliar. Before she could ask him anything more Shelly came into view jogging down the road. "Mornin' Shelly, how are you doing? Cup of coffee?" Mrs. Miller offered. "Thank you Miss Maddie, you know exactly what I need." Shelly replied. "No problem, suppose caffeine isn't much of a vice, give me a few minutes and I'll bring it out to you." Mrs. Miller said as she headed back toward the office. "Mornin' Austin, how're you doing?" Shelly asked as she took a seat at the table. "I'm doing fine. Thanks again for your help last night." Austin said as he lit a smoke. She waved her hand as if shooing him, "I only told you where the motel was I didn't perform a miracle." "You kinda did. I didn't know where I was or what I was going to do when my car wouldn't start." Austin said as he took a drag. The woman had no idea how much her kindness meant to him. "It was the least I could do; any decent body would've done the same. Did you see Mike at the garage yet?" "No I haven't gotten over there yet. I was going to head there after I was done here." "So what brings you to Levy? The only time people come here is when they're either lost or on the run." Shelly winked impishly. He noted her large brown eyes were kind, but appeared to study him. "Um, I got lost coming off of the interstate. I'm on my way to Florida to see my grandparents." Austin said in a low voice. "Sounds like a nice vacation, I'm sure you grandparents can't wait to see you." "They don't know I'm coming... it's more of a restart on life than a vacation." He confessed. "You're runnin' away from someone." Shelly said as she took a sip of coffee that Mrs. Miller had brought out. "I never said I was running away from anyone." Austin said, berating himself for trusting this stranger. His heart began to pound in his chest. Shelly's brown eyes bore into his emerald eyes. "Hun, you didn't have to say so, the black eye and busted lip tell me everythin'." Austin lowered his head and tears began to form in his eyes. "Look hun, I'm sorry for pryin'. It's just that you certainly aren't the type to get into bar fights. You struck me as alone and lost. I worried for you last night, I guess I figured I could help if you were hurtin' or in pain. My family's told me I gotta learn to keep my mouth shut." Shelly explained, upset she had caused Austin's distress. Austin brought his head up, meeting her concerned gaze. "You don't need to apologize. You're right I am running away from someone. I'm so scared he'll find me." "I know that you don't know me from Adam, but how about we walk and talk on over to Mike's. I'm a great listener. Sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger than someone you know." Shelly suggested. "I don't want to bother..." He began to protest. "You're not botherin' me. I offered to be a sounding board." She said with a smile. "As long as you don't mind." "I'll take these mugs in the office and we can be on our way." She said as she got up from the table. Austin wondered if talking to her was a wise thing, but then again he was only going to be there a little longer then it was off to Florida. He had no identity anyone would want to assume, and if they were going to harvest his organs they would have drugged him and taken them already. When Shelly came back the two of them headed down the road towards the bar. They walked in silence at first then she looked up at him, "Tell me about the him who put those cuts and bruises on you." Austin took a deep breath and words poured out of him like a waterfall. "The him is my boyfriend Eric. We've been together since high school, things where great then. He treated me like I was a king and I worshipped the ground he walked on. Eric was a star athlete, and he chose me. We were a god and a king on campus, things were perfect. His parents where never really too fond of the whole 'gay thing', but he's always been strong willed and they found a way to live with it. It was high school, but we were really happy." Austin paused; it felt like a lifetime had passed between now and then. "Everything changed years ago after the accident. My parents and I were on our way home from a night out and the weather had taken a turn for the worse. We knew that storms where going to move through our area but we didn't think much of it. We were on our way home from dinner and the sky opened up. Visibility just disappeared; it was like we were suddenly driving under water. I was watching water cascading down the window of the Explorer then the lights of a semi-truck heading right for us. My dad swerved out of the way but lost traction, we rolled off the road and down a drop off. I remember bits and pieces; being in the dark, calling for my mom and dad and no one answering. I couldn't move. The car they said rolled six times; I was trapped, and eventually passed out. I woke up in the hospital a week later. My mom and dad didn't make it; they were probably dead when I was calling for them. After that night I was alone." Shelly didn't interrupt, but he could see her eyes glisten with tears for him. "I still had four months of school left but I was already eighteen, the state didn't have to try and help me out. I wanted to finish at my school, where I'd been happy, so I told my grandparents I wanted to stay if I could. That's when Eric stepped in and saved me. He told me that I was going to move in with him and he was going to take care of me. Those last few months of school I was a zombie, it didn't help that I was in physical therapy four times a week. All I did was sleep, go to physical therapy, school and that was it. Eric was by my side every minute. He waited on me hand and foot; missing out on a lot of things like graduation parties, hanging with his friends and stuff." Austin pulled out a cigarette, grateful for Shelly's companionable silence. "Most of the money from the life insurance paid off my medical bills. Then with the rest we put down on our apartment and he took a job at the prison. The abuse didn't really start till after we moved out of his parent's home. At first it was little things like a shove or a raised voice but it quickly got a lot worse. He beats me, but my every weakness he uses against me. Every hour of the day he needs to control, he wants to own my very soul. But you see I found out what he did for me. His parents they wanted me out. They gave him a choice either he leave this phase and me behind or he would be cut off no money or help for college. He chose me and lost so much... an entirely different life, I think he hates me for it now." He took a long calming drag. Shelly's eyebrows knitted together. "Austin, hun I'm sorry someone so young has known your kind of sorrows. When it rains it sure can pour, but you've been getting' drenched for years now. Eric may believe he lost a lot but there is no reason to hurt someone. Especially someone he loves. He made that choice for a reason, for you. Instead of bein' eaten up by what he missed out on he should've been cherishin' what he had." "I know he did it because he loved me, but after the accident I changed. I didn't want to but something inside of me changed that I couldn't control. I tried my best to be a good boyfriend and at first he understood but after a while he got impatient and short tempered." "Austin how old are you?" Shelly asked. "I just turned twenty-two two weeks ago." "Hun, you've been livin' with him hurtin' you for four years now?" "Yeah I guess it's been that long. It's my fault things turned out the way they did. I shouldn't have been such a weakling." "Austin how many different reasons are you gonna give for him makin' a punchin' bag of you?" Austin heard her words, but still felt the need to explain that Eric had valid reasons to be angry. "But I shouldn't have let Eric postpone going to college to take care of me. He never wanted to work in a prison he was going for structural engineering." "Well hell hun, we all make decisions. Do you think my dream was to be in Levy tendin' bar? But I made choices that lead me here, and I can't blame anyone for that. Our choices and livin' with them is called life. If he was a decent man he would have learned to live with his choices. It's not your fault what happened to you. You shouldn't blame yourself for somethin' that you had no control over." "I know, logically I agree with everything you said but I just can't help it." Austin struggled to reconcile his conflicted feelings. "I don't know my own mind, it's like only right now I'm waking up after four years." Shelly pursed her lips. She had many opinions about how accurate that statement was. "Well I think you did the right thing by leavin' him. I want you to think on some things, just from an outsider's perspective. When y'all started datin' did your friends become y'alls friends or did you only hang out with his friends after that? Was he a really good student or did he struggle? He could do night school or online school, even with a full time job if he wanted to be an engineer, he would be over half way there. If he was that great of an athlete there were scholarship options for him and housin' arrangements y'all could've made. What stopped you from takin' your money and going to Florida after graduation? Did Eric decided on an apartment or did y'all decide it together? I could go on, but you need to ask and answer some of these things for yourself. Maybe then you can let yourself off the hook. I mean even if you go back, go back with a clear head." Now or Never: Escape to Freedom Austin shook his head, "I can never go back. If he ever found me I'm sure he'd kill me for leaving him." The certainty in his voice sent chills down Shelly's spine. She grabbed his arm, halting their stroll. "Well, we'll just have to make sure that never happens, I'll do what I can to help you." She dropped her hand and they continued on. They were silent as they approached the garage. "Let's see if we can't get you back on the road." "Morning Shelly how're ya doin'?" Mike asked as he came out from the shop. "I'm doin' just fine, thanks for askin'. This is Austin; he's the owner of the Crown Victoria." "Morning Austin, nice to meet you; I won't ask how ya doin' since a man with car troubles is never having a good day. Good news is I know the problem, your alternator's gone bad; when that happens no charge to your battery." Mike had long hair pulled into a greasy ponytail. His coveralls were a permanent home to oil stains. "I thought so, every time I'd come to a stop the lights would dim." "It's a pretty simple fix but your car's a police edition, the alternator's not standard, I'm gonna order one. Levy isn't a hub of activity so it'll be a few days." "How much is it going to cost?" Austin bit his lip worried the money he had wouldn't be enough. He missed Shelly standing behind him shaking her head and giving Mike a hard stare. "I really don't know but as soon as I find out I'll contact you right away. Do you have a number I can reach you at?" "Um...no I don't have a cell phone, but I am staying at the Pine Crest Motel." "Okay as soon as I find something I'll get a hold of you." "Thank you for your help." Austin said as he and Shelly left the garage. Shelly asked him if he wanted her to walk back to the motel but he politely declined and started to head back. He hoped that Mike would be able to find the part soon and he could get back on the road. He was confident it wasn't going to take long. He remembered when he worked on cars with his dad and they had replaced an alternator before. Austin began to ponder some of the questions Shelly had asked him. Had Eric used him as a convenient excuse? After he got back to his room Mrs. Miller came knocking on the door telling him that Mike was on the phone. Mike told him that the maximum total would be $450 that included labor and the part, and three days delivery. Mike said it could be less with a "Davenport special", chuckled than hung up. Austin had no idea what was funny; he was worried the delay was taking too much money from his final destination. His bleak options threatened to start a panic attack prompting him to take another walk around town and clear his head. He was failing. He tried to leave Eric and the universe was sending him a message that he had made a huge mistake. Maybe if he went back to Eric and they talked, he could offer some of Shelly's suggestions about school, and make Eric understand he didn't want to be treated that way. Austin walked and tried to convince himself he could go back, but he noticed his body was shaking. He looked at his watch as he clasped his hands and saw it was past one o'clock. He hadn't eaten lunch and he needed more smokes. He shrugged and decided to ask his appointed town guide. "Afternoon Austin." Shelly yelled from across the bar. "I'll be with you in just a minute." "Take your time." Austin replied as he took a seat at the bar. "What can I get for you?" "I was wondering if you knew of a place I could grab a bite to eat and pick up more cigarettes." "I sure do. The Red Barn Deli right down the road has great cheese steaks and anythin' else you need." "Thanks. How far of a walk do you think it is?" "It'd take you over twenty minutes to get there but just wait one second." Shelly said as she headed into the back of the bar. Shelly returned with a young man that looked about Austin's age. He was about an inch taller than Austin and muscular; Austin guessed he was close to two hundred pounds. He was dressed in tight blue jeans, button down plaid shirt and a worn baseball cap that covered his light brown hair and mesmerizing sky blue eyes. "Ryan this is Austin. He's in town for a few days on his way down to Florida. Ry, do me a favor and take him to the Red Barn since his car is in the shop." Shelly said as she introduced them "Sure thing mom. Do you want anything while I'm there?" Ryan asked. "No I'm good. Austin is that okay with you if Ryan takes you? I don't want you to have to walk all the way there and back it's gettin' hot out there." Shelly asked. "Um...yeah that's fine with me." Austin followed Ryan to an old 1975 Chevrolet pick-up. Shelly had been the nicest person to him but he realized he didn't know anything about her. He supposed her son couldn't be a danger, again if they meant to do him harm there was plenty of opportunity. Ryan easily engaged him in conversation. He had the same easy manner of his mother, even if physically Ryan probably resembled his father. Ryan joked about his mother. "Mom can be a little pushy, but she means well. I'm surprised she hasn't lectured you on the dangers of smoking." "No, Shelly's been unbelievably kind, no lectures." Austin assured him. Ryan chuckled, "Yeah, she's kind, but the lecture is coming. She says she was born to mother." Austin tried not to stare but he caught himself looking at Ryan. Ryan wasn't what he considered drop dead gorgeous but he had an appealing southern charm to him. He had a great laugh that showed perfect teeth. When they arrived at the store Austin had Ryan order for them since he had no idea what was good. They went out back to a table to wait on their order. Austin realized it was the first time he had been alone with a man other than Eric in four years. "So what's it like living in the north?" Ryan asked, bringing him out of thoughts. "What do you mean by that?" Austin was puzzled. "I've never been up north. Guess I wondered what differences you've observed." "Oh, well I love the snow. It's hard to describe the feeling of walking in the snow or feeling it, but it's neat whenever we would get a lot of snow and then when summer comes you look out into your yard and picture it being covered under a foot of snow. After being down here I can also say it's a lot faster paced, it seems like up there everyone is in a rush to go nowhere. To tell you the truth I kind of like how things down here are slowed down." "Our snow falls are mild and random. It brings everything to a halt, because we just aren't equipped for it. To tell you the truth we have more like two seasons, fall and summer. I wouldn't mind seeing everything all covered over in feet of white snow just once." "I think you'd like it." "I'm sure I would. But the pace of Levy actually suits me. Let me go and check on the food I'll be right back." "Here's the money for my half." Austin pulled out a twenty. "Please, put that away, mom would kill me." Ryan said with a smile. Austin and Ryan lingered at the deli for over an hour. Ryan Davenport he found out was the youngest of Shelly's children. Apparently Shelly was older than she looked or began her family very early. Austin found he was enjoying himself. He couldn't remember the last time he had such a good time; talking and simply being listened to with no fear of saying the wrong thing. He didn't know what it was about Ryan but he felt at ease. Most of the people he met were co-workers of Eric; he was usually intimidated by bigger men. "Hey, I was wondering if you're not doing anything tonight would you like to come to the drive-in with me? There isn't much to do in this town but I figured it would at least be something for you to do tonight." Austin paused, who had drive-in theaters? "Do you know what they're playing?" "It's a double feature. The first movie is The Hunger Games and the second is The NeverEnding Story." "I love The NeverEnding Story. That's my all-time favorite movie." Austin said with a huge smile. "So does that mean that you'll go?" "Yeah, but only if you let me pay for half." "Okay fine. I'll swing by the motel and pick you up around seven, we can grab a quick bite to eat then head over to the movie." Austin was excited to be going to the drive-in. It had been years since Eric had taken him anywhere. He could hardly contain himself as he was getting ready. After his shower he picked out his best pair of boot cut jeans and a nice light blue t-shirt. The last thing he did was get his hair ready. He fiddled with it until he had it just the way he liked it, deliberately messy and spiky. His chin strap of facial hair still looked neat, and his bruises didn't appear to be too bad, he was healing. His reflection was different, he saw more than a day's worth of healing; he was closer to being his true self, not a slave. He was excited he would be able to spend more time with Ryan. He didn't think about his attraction to Ryan, he was only in town for a few days and the Davenport clan was obviously freakishly nice. Ryan picked him up on time. When he was seated there was a picnic basket between them on the seat. "What's this?" Ryan laughed, "Mom. She's done this every time we go to the drive-in. It's the same basket and everything. She thinks the prices are way too high so she packs snacks. Have you ever had fried chicken at the movies?" Austin could only shake his head, which caused Ryan to laugh louder. Ryan found a great parking once they arrived. "I'll be right back. I love mom's cooking but I'm a man and a man needs real snacks at a movie." Ryan announced and exited the truck. "But just promise me you won't tell her." Austin laughed as the door closed. When he came back to the truck he was carrying large popcorn, soda and a big bag of M&M's. "How much do I owe you?" Austin asked as he brought out his wallet. "Oh, I didn't even remember how much it all was. Just give me five, I know it wasn't that much." Austin couldn't believe that but didn't want to be rude. "Are you sure that's all it was?" Austin asked. Ryan gave him an impish smile that looked remarkably familiar. "Yeah, somewhere there about, I'm sure." When it was time for his favorite movie, he felt like a little kid again watching it. He remembered watching it with his dad; it brought a tear to his eye when it started. Ryan saw his reserved companion's tears, but said nothing. His mom was right, Austin needed a friend. The movies ended well past mid-night and he was ready for a good night's sleep. He had a great day, the first in the longest time. Ryan pulled in front of his motel room. "Thanks for hanging out with me. Mom read us the book and we used to watch The NeverEnding Story when I was a kid. I always cried when Artax was overcome by sadness. Mom would say sadness could really do that, so to give everyone I met a smile, and they wouldn't get lost in the swamp." "Thanks for taking me; I had a really nice time." Even if Ryan was straight the night had all the hallmarks of a date. Austin was sure he simply hadn't had a good day in so long; he was reading more into it. But he was saddened at the thought of going to Florida and not seeing Ryan again. Ryan watched the slight man head to his room. "Maybe we can do it again, before you leave town?" Austin turned and smiled, "I'd like that, goodnight Ryan." He called as he entered the room. He realized he had left his wallet in his truck but he didn't worry, confident Ryan or Shelly would return it in the morning. Austin began removing his clothes and there was a knock on the door. "You didn't have to..." he said as he opened the door. He'd expected to find Ryan in his doorway with his wallet, but it wasn't. "Eric." The name escaped his lips as a gasp. The goatee, dark brown hair and grey eyed hulk of his nightmares blocked the doorway and he was frozen. It was too late to close the door; he had carelessly flung the door open to death. Eric stepped in, closed, and locked the door behind him. Austin walked backward, wanting to keep out of his reach. He had to find a way out. "E-Eric, what are you doing here?" "You're asking me what I'm doing here? What the fuck are you doing here?" Eric's voice boomed and Austin's knees buckled. If there were any neighbors they could hear through the thin walls, but he was the only guest at the motel. He had to calm Eric down, then maybe run... somewhere. "Eric, I had to get away just for a little while to clear my head." "Clear your head? Why fucktard? There isn't shit in it. You're so fucking stupid, good thing I put a tracker on your car. I never thought you'd be stupid enough to try and run away. And who the fuck were you with?" Eric advanced on Austin, towering over him. Austin willed himself to stay calm, "No one, the car is in the shop and I had to get a ride from the restaurant. Eric, please listen to me, I love you but I can't go back with you if you're going to keep treating me this way." Eric snorted, "Bitch you think you have options? You're coming home with me whatever I do, your ass is mine! I didn't give up everything for you to run off! Now you can do this one of two ways, the easy way or the hard way, that's your only choice." "I'm s..sorry but I'm not going, I can't live like that anymore!" Austin yelled. "You're begging for a reminder of who you belong to!" Eric took a step back. He surveyed the room looking for something to restrain Austin with. Getting him into his car was his top priority, leaving Austin's car so there could never be a repeat of this farce; the clothes as well, best to keep him naked. "I'm not going to tell you again, you're coming home, you've caused me enough trouble!" Austin panicked, he had to get away. He sprinted for the door but Eric tripped him, casually as if he anticipated his move. Austin fell to the floor in excruciating pain. Eric pummeled him, punching him over and over in the face. Rage seized him and he wrapped his hands around Austin's neck and began to squeeze. Austin hit at him, trying to fight back but Eric was much stronger. He registered the look of pure hatred in the eyes that he once loved to look into. He was getting light headed. He thought he heard a pounding on the door as his sight began to go dim. The door flew open, ripping the chain lock off the door frame, and Ryan burst in with a 12 gauge shot gun in his hand. "Let him go!" Ryan yelled as he pointed the shot gun at Eric. "Fuck off! I don't know who the fuck you are but this is none of your business!" Eric said as he gripped even harder. "I'm not going to tell you again. Let him go or they are gonna have to put your face back together for the funeral," the shot gun made the ominous click click noise as Ryan pumped it, "a closed casket I'm guessing." Eric met the strangers blue eyes, and then stared into the barrel of the gun. He had no illusions the southern meat puppet meant what he said. He released his hold on Austin. Austin gasped for air as he tried to crawl away but Eric viciously kicked the side of his head sending blood across the room. "I don't know what the fuck is going on but leave and never come back. Because the next time I lay eyes on you there won't be any words." Ryan said never dropping the shot gun from Eric. "I'll be back to claim what's mine and when I do there's not going to be a goddamned thing you can do to stop me." Eric promised as he made his way to the door. Ryan kept his gun on Eric as he got into his car. He did not lower the weapon until he was sure he was gone. He pulled out his cell phone and called his mother. He instructed her to call the sheriff and send the ambulance to Austin's room. He hung up before she could ask him any questions. He knelt beside Austin; his body was still, lying in the same spot covered in blood. He knelt down and placed his hand on Austin side and felt that he was still breathing but it was shallow. He prayed that the ambulance would get there quickly, but Shelly arrived first. "Jeezus Ryan! What happened?" Shelly asked as she ran into the room. "I was bringing back Austin's wallet he left in the truck and I figured we could eat cold chicken. When I got here this strange guy was attacking him, I could hear him clear outside. So I grabbed the shot gun and made him leave." Ryan said as he held onto Austin's hand. Shelly went in the bathroom and emerged with towels. "Carefully Ryan we have to get him on his back, it'll help him breath. But I need you to make sure his head and neck stay aligned, and then I want you to put pressure on those bleeders on his face. Hopefully I won't have to do CPR." Ryan did as he was ordered; his mother was obviously worried about a spinal injury. After they rolled him he tended to Austin head, the kick had made a gash that was oozing blood in the golden brown hair. Shelly forced Austin's eye open and peered in. Ryan could tell from her thin lipped expression she did not like the state he was in. "If the paramedics don't get here soon we may have to try driving him. I should've asked him to stay with us. I think that guy was Austin's boyfriend." Shelly said with a sigh. "Boyfriend?" Ryan asked clearly puzzled. "Yeah, Austin's gay and he made it clear he was terrified of his boyfriend findin' him," Shelly shook her head as she looked at the broken young man, "now I can see why. I didn't think he could find him in Levy or I would have warned you, but I didn't want to betray his confidence." "I mean I knew he was gay, I just didn't know he was trying to save his life. He told me he was on his way to Florida. I figured he was going on vacation." "I figured if you two became friends I could convince him to hide here a while. Eric would know he was headed to his grandparents, so much for my good intentions." "It's okay mom, you did the best you could. You always try to catch people when they fall. We've caught Austin, and we Davenport's don't let go." Shelly nodded at her son, proud she had raised so decent a man. Off in the distance they could hear the scream from the ambulance. When the paramedics arrived they worked quickly on Austin getting him secured on the stretcher and transporting him to the hospital almost forty miles away. Ryan met with Sheriff Greames, piecing together where Eric lived from the information in Austin's wallet. Greames wasn't a bad sort but Ryan hated the raised eyebrow he got when he told him that Eric was Austin's boyfriend. After giving what details he could he drove over to the hospital to meet his mother. "I just got off the phone with the sheriff. Jim's alright but he hasn't ever been the brightest bulb. How are you holdin' up?" Shelly asked. Before he could answer the doctor approached them from the double doors. Shelly and Ryan rose to meet him. "Well, he has three broken ribs, his right wrist has a fracture, dislocated jaw, six stitches for the laceration, and I suspect tissue damage to his neck, which is going to be sore for a while. How much do you know about him?" Shelly shrugged. "Not much. I only met him the other day. Why?" The dark eyed doctor stepped in closer, "Well, after examining him I noticed bruises at different stages of healing. Some were old but there were some that I could tell where fairly new." "It tracks. The same boyfriend Ryan stopped has been doin' this a while." Shelly offered. "Do you know if his boyfriend is still in the area?" "I'm not sure if he's still lurkin' around." "I made my intentions to blow his head off if I ever see him in Levy pretty clear." Ryan affirmed. The doctor smirked, "Well Quick-draw, as intimidating as that is I'm going to have the staff on alert. This place isn't that large, so we'll keep him close to the nurse's station." "I can keep watch over his room." Now or Never: Escape to Freedom "Ry this guy is demented. You don't need to get involved any further with this." The doctor replied. "I'm 23 years old, get over yourself Mikey! I'm a grown man so get over the big brother crap." Ryan spat back. "Ryan and Michael this is not the time or the place." Shelly shot her sons a look of annoyance. "Okay fine. I'm just warning you he's really banged up and you never know how people are going to behave when they're in pain." Michael replied. When they entered the room Ryan sat next to Austin who was hooked up to wires and tubes, only Michael knew the functions of. Shelly stood with tears in her eyes. Even though she had only known Austin for a few days her heart went out to him. She could not grasp how someone could hurt another person who didn't do anything to deserve it. She pictured one of her own sons lying in a hospital and how awful it would be if they were alone. "How long is he goin' to have to stay here?" Shelly asked her eldest son. "It all depends. There are insurance issues, and safety concerns. We're a small hospital; they are going to want to transfer him after he's stable if he has no insurance. That's standard procedure here. I'd estimate two days, before that happens. The problem is once he leaves here he's going to need a lot of attention; time and attention. Where's he from?" "New Jersey but he was running to Florida to make a new start." Ryan answered his brother. "That won't be happening anytime soon." "We'll have to help him until that time comes." Michael studied his brother then let his eye rest on his mother. Deciding he would speak with them individually later, "Okay. I have to go make my rounds I'll stop back by when I'm done." "Ryan, I'm goin' home and talk to your father about somethin'. Do you want to come with me?" Shelly asked. "No, I want to stay here in case he wakes up. I don't want him to wake up alone after what he went through." She kissed him on the head and left the room. Ryan sat listening to the sounds of the machines and prayed Austin was going to be okay. ***** Austin woke the next day. He was covered under Eric's insurance through the prison. Michael worried the coverage would be dropped and Austin would have a large medical debt. Ryan remained true to his word and spent most days and nights in Austin's room. He brought in his childhood copy of The NeverEnding Story and read to him. On the sixth day the phone in the room rang. Ryan answered. "Shit kicker, tell my bitch I'll see him soon," then the line went dead. Ryan looked at the drugged, sleeping Austin and left the room. He had to speak to his brother and mother, that crazy bastard knew exactly where Austin was. The three Davenport's gathered in his room a few hours later and Michael explained he was being discharged. Michael prescribed pain killers and muscle relaxers with very specific directions for their administration and his care. Austin protested, but there was nothing he could do in the face of their overwhelming determination. He would stay with them until he was well enough to travel to Florida. If he was not so worn down from trying to argue with them and the drugs he would have noticed he exited through the back of the hospital; when the car left the parking lot seven other cars followed them, each making different turns on the way back to Levy. When they pulled up to the house he was shocked. The Davenport home was a stately antebellum house. "Don't be impressed, it's just four walls." Shelly said as she noted his expression. Austin wanted to ask her questions about her 'four walls' but he couldn't focus. When the car pulled up to the front of the house all he could do was stare at the massive steps, stairs were his latest nemesis. It took him a few minutes to climb them, even with assistance every step he took caused pain to shoot through his body. He made it into the house to face a grand stair case. Shelly read the look of dread on his face and told him he would be staying in one of the first floor bedrooms. She set him up in one of the back bedrooms facing the open field. She explained it had a wonderful view and caught a nice breeze in the afternoon. Austin was more than relieved when he sat down on the edge of the king sized bed; the pain was starting to get unbearable. "Would you like somethin' to eat hun?" Shelly asked as she opened the French doors to let in some fresh air. "No thank you. I think I just want to take my pills and lie down." Austin said as he gazed around the large plush bedroom. "Okay. If you need anythin' you just Ryan or I know." She said with that warm smile. Austin climbed onto the bed and tried to get comfortable. He fell in love with the bed; it felt like he was lying on a cloud. It wasn't long before he was asleep. He slept for three dreamlessly drugged hours before Shelly knocked on his door. "Come in." Austin croaked. "I'm sorry to wake you but I want to change your bandages before I head to the bar." Shelly said as she entered the room. "It's okay. I shouldn't sleep too much or I won't tonight." Austin said as he struggled to get up. Shelly took great care in removing the old bandages and applying the new ones. Austin was very grateful for her caring touch and said so. "Oh, I'm very familiar with injuries, mostly because I would have to patch my daddy up once a month. I can't recall a week without him bein' in a bar beat up or me havin' to go pull him out. He was the town drunk." Austin sat in stunned silence as she spoke and worked. "My grandmother, we called her Sweet Ma, sunk every dime into coverin' the destruction he'd cause. Once the tab got so big at the Waterin' Hole, she just said to hell with it, and bought the place. He could drink for free." "I'm sorry." Austin didn't know what to say, but her childhood sounded horrible. "For what? My daddy was a self destructive man, and Sweet Ma and Old Pa were fools, but they loved me. I only mention it because I want you to know that I understand wrestlin' with conflicted feelins about people who you love. Those are big issues. You can stay here as long as you need. You understand me hun?" Austin could only nod. He would cry if he tried to use his voice "Okay I'm off to the bar. If you need anythin' just let Ryan know and he will take care of it. Goodnight hun." Not long after she left the need for a smoke became all powerful. He climbed out of bed and made his way to his suitcase. It hurt like hell when he knelt down unzipped it and searched for his beloved smokes. He questioned whether it was really worth the pain for a stupid cigarette? After he went onto the porch and lit up he knew the answer was yes. He sat in the silence and looked out onto the open field lost in a daze. It wasn't until he heard Ryan's voice did he snap out of his trance. "I'm sorry to walk in on you but I knocked and you didn't answer." Ryan said as he sat down next to Austin. "It's okay. It's your house you come and go as you please." Austin said as he took another drag. "How're you feeling? Do you want something to eat?" Ryan asked. "No I'm good. I think these pills kill my appetite." "Hey do you have one I can bum?" Ryan asked as he pointed toward the cigarette. "You smoke?" "Yeah, I just ran out." "Okay." Austin said as he handed him the pack. "Our family used to be tobacco farmers; this house has been in our family since pre-civil war." "This is the house tobacco built?" "Yes and no. It was a real wreck, moms been restoring the old place all her life, dad and I make sure the ranch runs smoothly. What we live on comes from bar profits and horse. Tobacco and wealth were generation ago, this place is an echo I guess." "Now I really feel awful, like I'm interfering with your lives." "No you're not, you see the size of this place, so you know we have lots of room. And I couldn't leave you alone after what I saw," Ryan looked at Austin's healing face. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for what happened to you the other day. And for your safety you should know we rushed you out of the hospital because Eric called the room. He knew exactly where you were." Ryan said as he lit the cigarette. Surprisingly Austin was not surprised to know Eric found him. Eric always got what he wanted, and he wanted him back. "It's okay. It's not your fault. I should've known better than to think I could run away from Eric. I'm only delaying the inevitable, with a tracker on my car or not he'll find me I know it. I got what I deserved." "Aw horseshit! I'm sorry, but no one deserves to be beaten like you were, and I know that wasn't the first time he's done it. I hope you aren't thinking about going back to him?" "Do I really have a choice? No matter what I do or where I go he'll always follow me. I don't want to spend the rest of my life running from someone." Austin said as he hung his head in defeat. "I don't want to live the rest of my life in fear; that the next knock at the door could be him, or the car that is behind me could be him." Austin started to cry. "Austin please don't cry, I didn't mean to upset you. I'm scared for you. I've never seen anything like that before in my life. When I heard him in your room I actually was going to leave, but I grabbed my gun and the next thing I knew I was kicking in the door. If he hadn't of stopped I would have killed him." Ryan said as he put his arm around Austin. "I'm sorry I haven't had anyone stick up for me like that, thanks." Austin said and moved to return the hug, but pain shot through his chest and he pulled back. "You okay?!" Ryan asked. "No, no oh god it hurts." Austin hissed. "Shit! I'm sorry I forgot about your broken ribs. Mikey said to not let the pain pills out of your system, so let's get you back to bed and I'll get you something to take the pills with." Ryan did not wait for an answer as he ushered Austin to bed. He bore Austin's weight effortlessly, and Austin could feel the strength of his hard muscles. Ryan left him sitting on the edge of the bed and ran to the kitchen returning with milk, puzzled to find him sitting exactly where he left him. "You don't want to go to bed?" "Yeah, but I can't get undressed by myself." Austin turned scarlet as he shared his dilemma. He hadn't thought twice about Shelly helping him, but the thought of Ryan undressing him made his heart race. Ryan smiled, "I'm not so dumb to think you can do it alone. My brother is your doctor, my dad and me work on a ranch and my mom's bandaged up plenty of people at the bar. We have healing workshop with the horses so we know what taking care of folks entails and volunteered to help you. In fact mom left the hospital the first night to clear it with dad. Relax and let me help you, okay?" Sheepishly Austin nodded his head. If only Ryan knew why he was hesitant to have him remove his clothes, he may not feel so charitable. He sat on the edge of the bed and Ryan slowly removed his shirt, taking special care not to hit his ribs. He then took off Austin's shoes and socks and set them away from the bed so Austin wouldn't trip on them. Then came the part Austin was worried most about; Ryan had Austin stand and he started to unbutton his jeans. Austin could feel his cock start to harden and he was praying that Ryan wouldn't notice. He tried to conjure pictures of Eric, or road kill but nothing worked. He ordered his renegade member to go down, mentally explaining to his body part that Ryan was a very nice straight guy but even the nicest of straight guys have their limits, and a rock hard cock in his face was it. Ryan did not give Austin any indication he noticed the semi-hard on once his jeans were off. He didn't want to embarrass him, and could think of no easy way to reassure him. What did disturb him were the older bruises his brother had mentioned. He also noticed scars on his legs. Some were noticeable and others you had to really look for to see them. He started to get a lump in his throat realizing that the abuse had been going on for a while. Ryan helped him into the bed and pulled the covers up for him. "Are you sure that you don't want anything to eat?" Ryan asked as he sat on the other side of the bed. "No, I really am good. Thanks though." Austin said, could feel his pills starting to kick in. Ryan sat and began reading from where he left off. He wasn't making swift progress; he stopped whenever Austin went back sleep. It wasn't long before his steady breathing let him know he was out. He was seized by nightmares not soon after Ryan left his side. He dreamt he was back in the motel and Ryan had come to his rescue but this time Eric got the gun and shot Ryan. Eric then turned to him and told him he wanted him to watch his little county boy die before he ended his miserable life. Austin woke screaming and was covered from head to toe in sweat. Ryan rushed into the room. "Austin, what's the matter? Are you hurt?" "I...I had a nightmare." Austin said as he broke down in tears. "Do you want to tell me about it?" "It's too horrible to talk about." Austin sobbed through the pain of his broken ribs. "It's okay you don't have to talk about it. You're safe here. I'll stay with you." After he started to calm down he felt very grungy from waking up in a sweat and he wanted a shower. He told Ryan that he wanted to take a bath to get clean. Ryan immediately phone Michael, who agreed it would be alright as long as he was monitored in the bathroom. Ryan told him that he was going to help with his bath and Austin protested. "Mikey's orders and I'm not going to have you slip and fall trying to get in or out." Ryan told him. Austin wished he hadn't mentioned the bath; there was no way he could be bathed by Ryan and not react. Straight or not he wanted him in the worst way. "I just don't want to be a bother." "I haven't known you long but when we hung out that day we really got along. I don't have many friends since most of them moved away after high school. So I really don't mind." Ryan said with a smile. "Come on let's get you into that bath you want." Austin didn't have any friends and no address for his grandparents. The Davenports were all he had and he needed their friendship. But if didn't stop himself he could easily alienate his lifeline. When they reached the bathroom Austin fretted over getting completely naked in front of Ryan, but he really wanted that bath. Ryan helped him get his underwear off. As Ryan stood back up his hand brushed against Austin cock sending shock waves throughout his entire body, his inner gears had started and there wasn't anything that could to stop it. He was at full salute by the time Ryan turned around from starting the bath, and he was mortified. "I'm so sorry." Austin said looking down at the floor. "Sorry for what?" Was Ryan playing dumb, he thought? "For getting hard when you accidently brushed my dick." "It's okay it happens to all of us." Ryan replied. "Let's get you in the tub, it'll feel great on your sore muscles." Ryan was right the hot water felt great. Almost as soon as he slid into the water he could feel his aching muscles start to relax. Austin felt as if he could live in the old claw foot tub. He sat back and relaxed in the water letting the pain fade away, at least for the moment. Ryan asked if Austin wanted anything to eat. Surprisingly he was hungry and he told him so. Ryan left the room to start heating the food; before he left he told Austin that he would be back in a few minutes to help him get out of the tub. Austin rested his head on the back of the tub and closed his eyes. Five minutes went by and Ryan was back in the bathroom with some lounge pants and a tank top for Austin to wear. "I brought you something more comfortable to wear. I know that room sometimes gets a little warm at night." Ryan said as he put the clothes on the sink. "Thanks. You didn't have to do that for me." Austin said with a smile. "It's okay but stop thanking and apologizing so much." Ryan said with a laugh. "You ready to get out?" Ryan helped Austin get out of the tub and dried him off. Once he was dressed they made their way to the kitchen where the chicken noodle soup was warming on the stove, and it smelled divine. Ryan ladled some into a bowl for Austin then himself. "Careful it's very hot." Ryan said as he placed it in front of Austin. "It smells great. You made it yourself?" Austin asked as he inhaled the aroma. "Sure did. With dad working on the ranch a lot and mom working at the bar, I learned how to cook to help out." Ryan said as he blew on the soup to cool it down. Soon after Austin had finished eating he was very tired. He thanked Ryan for the wonderful late night dinner and went back to the room. Ryan wished him a good night and started to clean up the kitchen. Only a few minutes after Austin was in his room Shelly came home from the bar. "Hey Ry, what're you still doin' up?" She asked as she put her keys down. "Austin had a nightmare." "Is he okay?" "I think so. He wouldn't tell me what it was about but I'm sure it was pretty bad since he woke up soaking wet. He took a bath and ate something; he just went back to bed about five or so minutes ago. Would you like some soup before I put it away?" He asked. "That'd be nice. It was crazy tonight and I didn't have time to grab anythin' to eat." "Mom, can I talk to you about something?" Ryan asked. "You know you can." Shelly said sitting down. "Do you think Austin will be okay?" Ryan asked as he put out a bowl for his mother. "Well, it's hard to say. I mean look at us, what the hell do we know about normal?" "So he might always live with these nightmares?" "Yup, it's a possibility." Shelly blew her soup. She wanted to have another conversation with her son, but knew he had to broach the subject. Ryan felt horrible knowing that Austin might never be able to live a life without fear. ***** Over the next four weeks Austin's injuries started to mend and he started to do more for himself, but Michael hadn't cleared him to drive. The more time they spent together the stronger Austin's feelings became for Ryan. The way Ryan took care of him, the kind words, the way he would make sure he had everything he needed so he didn't have to do extra moving. Austin wondered what his life would be like if he had a relationship with Ryan, but he knew he could not fall in love with Ryan; he was straight. The tracker had been found and removed. Once he was well enough to drive he knew that he had to get out of Levy before it got any worse. He was happy that he had a friend in Ryan, but he knew it would never be anymore than that which felt like a different kind of heartbreak. It was an unusually hot day as Austin was walking around the horse stables when he ran into Mr. Davenport. "Well hello, Austin. How are you doing today?" Tom asked. He was an older version of Ryan; tall, blue eyed and a body of muscles built by labor. He was also as good and decent as rest of his family "Pretty good, I made it from the house to here without having to stop." Austin said with a smile. "What are you up to?" "The weather said there could be very strong thunderstorms and I wanted to get the stables ready in case one of them hit." Tom replied as he scattered extra hay. "Is there anything I can do to help?" "You ask that every day and I always have the same answer. No, you need your rest; your very competent doctor hasn't released you. Now it's a scorcher so take your time getting back to the house." Tom replied with that same southern smile. He decided Mr. Davenport was right; by the time Austin had made it back to the house he was soaked from the sweat. After Austin took a nice cool shower he lay on the bed and took a nap, he was sleeping less and less and wasn't relying on the medicine as much. He would have slept through the storm if the wind hadn't blown the doors open. He climbed out of bed and saw it was much darker out than it should have been at that time of day. As he stepped out of the doors, and lit a smoke, he was confronted by strong winds. It was evident this was going to be a monster storm. Now or Never: Escape to Freedom "Hey I'm glad to see you're awake." Ryan said as he joined Austin for a smoke. "Yeah the wind woke me up. Is everything okay?" Austin said as thunder rumbled in the distant. "I heard on the radio that we're under a severe thunderstorm warning." Ryan said as he took a drag. "I was helping dad finish up with the horses. I figured since its going to be storming out maybe you'd like to watch some movies?" "Yeah, that sounds like fun." Austin said with a smile. "I always love to watch movies when there's a good storm out. What kind of movie do you want to watch?" Ryan asked as he flicked his cigarette. "Anything really." Austin said. "Okay, I'll go run and grab some and you get comfortable." Ryan said as he turned and headed out to the living room. A few minutes later Ryan returned with a few movies and a big bowl of popcorn. They decided to watch a scary movie to go along with the storm. After looking thought the scary movies Austin picked out the original Amityville Horror. That movie always scared him and he loved it. They both slipped under the covers and dove into the popcorn. They left the door open to the patio to let in the cool air. About half way into the movie the storm unleashed its full force but Austin was to into the movie to take any notice; until a bolt of lightning struck and the crack of the thunder sent him flying under the covers. Ryan couldn't help but chuckle but he soon realized that Austin was genuinely scared. Then he remembered that sudden movements or loud sounds could startle Austin. He had opened up so much Ryan had allowed himself to forget how much Austin was burdened with. He reached down and pulled Austin up into his arms. It took a few minutes but Austin finally started to calm down and stop shaking. "I'm sorry. I'm such a baby sometimes." Austin said. "You're not a baby. You've been through a lot and you're going to be jumpy." Ryan said as he lifted Austin's head and looked into his eyes. "Thanks for understanding." Austin said as he cracked a smile. "Don't worry as long as I'm around no one is going to harm you." Ryan said as he looked deep into Austin's deep emerald eyes. Austin froze and Ryan's face moved closer to his. His brain short circuited trying to reconcile the reality that Ryan was moving in for what he hoped was a kiss. Ryan's warm lips on his grounded him fully in reality. His heart and dick jumped at the same time. He didn't know what to do, should he stop, should he keep going, but his desire took over and he started kissing Ryan back. For what seemed like hours they kissed slowly, learning one another's taste and touch. Lust took over and the kiss became more intense. As he rolled onto his back he could feel Ryan's massive hard on pressing into his thigh, sending Austin farther into lust. Ryan started to grind against Austin leg sending shock waves through his body. Austin's dick was aching from being confined in his underwear and it wanted release. Ryan broke the kiss to remove his shirt revealing his muscular chest. He helped Austin take his off tossing it to the side. He kissed his way down Austin's neck, making his way across his hairless chest to his soft pink nipple. He slowly started to lick and suckle on it while he rubbed the other with his hand. He made his way other to the other nipple and took his hand and slid it under Austin's sweat pants and started to massage his rock hard cock; he could feel the wet spot from where Austin was precumming. Austin's gasps and moans encouraged his exploration. The idea he was the cause of the sexy sounds the emerald eyed beauty was making only intensified the passion flowing through his veins. Ryan couldn't resist anymore and pulled Austin's cock from its confinement. He had seen Austin naked and erect before, but he finally had the hot heavy meat in his hands. It must have been at least nine inches and thick; it glistened with precum. Any uncertainty he had vanished, he knew he had to taste it. As he slid it in his mouth he got his first taste of precum and he was surprised at the taste; it was a salty sweet and he loved it. As he started sucking he removed his pants and underwear and started to jerk his own leaking cock. He knew he was not going to last much longer, it was too intense, and by the moans coming from Austin he knew that he wasn't going to either. He could feel Austin's cock swell and thicken as he took more and more into his mouth; Ryan was in heaven. Austin wanted to say so many things, but he couldn't form words. Ryan, the straight southern boy, was sucking on his dick. He had dreamed of this but never guessed it would come true. The feeling was beyond his wildest dreams. It had been so long since Eric had taken him in his mouth he had forgotten how incredible the feeling was. Ryan's mouth was so hot and wet that he almost lost it a few times; he did not want it to end. The pain in his chest reminded him of his injuries but the pain lost all relevance next to the sensation of being in Ryan's mouth. Austin could not hold back anymore, he tried to warn Ryan that he was going to cum but he couldn't get the words out and he shot in Ryan's mouth. Ryan was so turned on by Austin shooting his load that it sent him over the edge and he shot his load all over his stomach and chest. Once the high of the orgasm came down the guilt of what had just happen settled on Austin. "I'm sorry I shot in your mouth. I tried to say something but I couldn't speak." Austin said. Ryan resumed his place next to Austin and began cleaning himself with the edge of the blanket. "It's okay. To tell you the truth it was amazing!" Ryan smiled at him. Austin couldn't do anything but smile; no one had ever told him that before. "Can I ask you a question?" Austin asked. "Anything." "How long have you known you were gay?" "I think I've always known, but this is a small town in the deep south. I decided a long time ago that I was just going to keep it to myself. There was no need to upset people with it." Ryan replied. "You think your mom would have a problem with it?" Austin asked. Ryan snorted, "Hell no and dad either. They have only ever wanted us to be happy. Now my dad's parents don't like mom because her dad was Levy's drunk. They are old fashion southerners. They believe things should be a certain way and change is hard for them." Austin settled in Ryan's arms, "I can understand why you haven't told anyone yet." "I've wanted to talk to my mom about it but its hard trying to find the right time to talk to her." "You'll know when the time is right." Austin said with a smile. "I know from when I told my parents." "They sound like they were great. How are your grandparents?" Ryan asked "I know they know I'm gay. I can't say it was an issue. But I always had my parents. I never really gave much thought to my grandparents except on holidays. To tell you the truth I don't even know their address. I only have the name and the town. Eric controlled all communication; I couldn't even use the internet." Ryan didn't know what to say. He did not want to talk about Eric or the grandparents in Florida. Did Austin still want to go? Did he even want Austin to go? It was his choice, but Ryan didn't want to think about it, not at that moment. "Hey let's wash up and see get a snack. I like to eat after I come." Ryan joked. They cleaned themselves and rummaged through the refrigerator. "I hope I didn't hurt you." "What do you mean?" Austin puzzled. "I know your ribs are still healing and I kind of got carried away." "No, you didn't hurt me. It felt really good to tell you the truth I've never had anyone suck me off like that." Austin said with a smile. "I've never sucked a dick before; I'm surprised you liked it." Ryan said as he set out some leftover mac and cheese. "For your first time it was amazing." Austin said with a smile. "So there's room for improvement?" Ryan quizzed him. Austin giggled, he was having to rate the blow job from Ryan, it struck him as comical. "No, well maybe, I don't really know. It wasn't amateurish to me. But there was only Eric and he never did it more than a handful of times. It was the best I've ever had." "Guess all of that internet porn was good for more than one thing." Ryan reached and gently pulled Austin in his embrace, their bodies barely skin to skin. He wanted to only feel the heat of his lover. Once he did he knew he truly did not want them to be over anytime soon. Ryan nuzzled Austin's ear, taking notice how perfectly it was formed. "Austin, once you're healed what are you planning on doing?" Austin could only answer with his original plan, after all Ryan wasn't out, and he didn't want to read too much into what had happened. "I'm going to Florida and start and new life." "I want a chance to get to know you better. Why don't you start a new life here, with me? Even if you don't want to date me I want you around." Ryan said, suddenly nervous as he realized how much he wanted Austin to stay as his boyfriend. "You really want that?" Austin pulled back to see Ryan's face. Ryan nodded, "More than anything. Ever since the first day I saw you in the bar something inside me tripped. Each day I've spent with you I've grown attached to you, and I don't want to see you go. But I'll understand if you decided to leave. I mean you were in a brutal relationship and I can see you wanting your freedom. Plus Levy has nothing on Florida, but I had to tell you how I feel." Austin was at a cross road. He hadn't fantasized about the choice to stay and start a new life in Levy with Ryan or to head to Florida. The mantra he began reciting as he left New Jersey raced though his mind, it was his life, his choice and it was now or never... * Thanks for reading Chapter 1 of Now or Never: Escape to Freedom. Keep an eye out for Chapter 2: Austin's decision. Follow me on Twitter, CE_300, to stay up to date with the current chapter I am working on!