7 comments/ 19347 views/ 5 favorites Fear, Confusion...Love? By: RightfullyWrong Mark was 19 and he was average. Everything about him was average. He was average height, average weight, average IQ and sick of it. After finishing 6th form college, Mark had decided to take a gap year before going on to University. He'd had it all planned. He'd sold his car, sold his guitar, worked cutting lawns for the old people near his house and ended his one-year relationship with his girlfriend. He was young, free and single and he had enough money to book himself on a to pretty much anywhere in the world. Every penny Mark had raised for his trip was in cash. It was sitting in the back of his wardrobe, counted and ready. The only thing he had to do now was stick it in his bank account so that he could book everything and that was it. He was out of this crummy town for a year before going to Uni down south. On Thursday morning, Mark put the money into an envelope along with his bank card and went downstairs. His mother heard him. "Where are you going at this time of day?" she asked him suspiciously, "I know you've quit working and you aren't seeing that dumb bitch anymore!" Marks mum had always hated his ex but if you asked him, it was because his mother didn't want anyone taking her boys attention off her. "I'm going to the bank to drop that money off mum," Mark said through gritted teeth "Just like I told you last night." Mark heard his mother make a comment but didn't quite catch it. 'Evil old bitch' he thought to himself as he slammed the door on his way out. Looking at his watch as he walked, Mark realised that he'd missed the bus into town. Since passing his driving test 2 years ago, he'd never got on a bus until he'd sold his car a week ago and he still couldn't manage to figure out the timetables! He decided that it was a nice enough day to walk, despite being the middle of November, and he could cut down the alley between his street and the one it backed onto and then through the rugby ground and cut a few minutes off his journey. Rugby had never interested Mark, the thought of having a bunch of sweaty blokes grabbing him and pulling him around did less than nothing for him. 'Give me football any day' he thought as he cut across the field and saw a couple of guys practicing tackles. Suddenly he heard a shout from the direction of the players and saw one of them jog towards him. "What are you doing here? This is private property you know?" asked the guy. "Sorry," replied Mark "I didn't realise, I thought I could cut through here to get into town...you always used to be able too but I've been driving for 2 years and you know how it is, the novelty doesn't wear off and before you know it, you don't know how to walk!" Not normally a big talker, Mark was surprised to find himself chatting so easily with this guy but he figured that if he could make him laugh then he might get away with using this short cut. "Are you new around here?" asked Tony (as the rugby player had introduced himself) "Kinda," replied Mark "Me and my mum moved here about 3 years ago after my dad died. Too many memories back home but I miss it." Before he knew what had happened, Mark found himself pouring out everything to this random stranger. He told him all about his fathers' death, his problems with his suffocating mother and his travelling plans. "Fancy a drink?" said Tony "We've just finished training and I was going to have a walk into town and see if anyone was out." "Fuck it, why not?" Mark was feeling oddly happy about the offer. It was almost as if he'd been asked out on a date! 'Get a grip' he thought 'You're behaving like a some weird homo'. It wasn't that Mark was homophobic, he just didn't really get the concept and found the thought of it faintly disgusting although he'd once looked up some videos on the 'net and thought about experimenting. His experiments ended after he'd tried fingering himself and figured that it wasn't worth the effort. At 5 to 5 that afternoon, Mark and Tony rolled out of the pub and staggered up the high street to the bank. They reached it just as the doors were locked. "Bollocks!" yelled Mark. Tony started laughing hysterically "What's so fucking funny?" Demanded Mark swinging towards his new friend and glaring at him. "You're out with a rugby player mate, everyone knows we have funny shaped balls! Wanna see?" There was a pause for a couple of seconds while Mark turned this thought over in his mind. Suddenly he realised he was over thinking this, why the Hell would he want to see some other blokes nuts? He hoped that his silence could be blamed on the drink and Tony wouldn't figure out what he'd been thinking. "Shut up you idiot, this is serious!" Mark laughed as he said it still hoping that Tony wouldn't have noticed the pause. Tony had stopped laughing and was giving Mark a strange look. He reached out a hand as if he were going to grab Mark and then seemed to change his mind. "I've got to go mate, got a match tomorrow and....well...y'know...stuff to do. I'll text you next week and we can go out for a drink or something." Tony walked off leaving Mark feeling a bit stunned and vaguely disappointed. 'What the fuck was that all about?' Mark asked himself. Realising that he wasn't going to be able to sort out his cash until the following day, Mark started walking towards to bus stop. He was a few yards away when he saw the bus move away 'It's not my fucking day!'. It was dark and freezing cold but it was either wait here for 20 minutes freezing his nads off or do the 15 minute walk home 'At least if I'm walking I'll be warm!' Mark decided. When he reached the rugby ground, Mark checked to see if anyone was around before he jumped the fence. He figured if anyone said anything he could tell the he was a friend of Tony's and, hopefully, get away with it. There was no one around though 'Lucky old me' thought Mark as he crossed the field to the alley behind his house. Suddenly he heard a noise. It was the quiet kind of noise that someone makes when they're trying to be quiet. 'Idiot kids' Mark thought before heading down the alley. Within moments, Mark realised his mistake. He felt the cold pressure of a knife against his neck and a leather gloved hand slipped over his mouth. "Don't make a sound," said a voice "Don't speak, don't move." The hand that had covered his mouth now started slipping down his body to his crotch. "If you do anything silly I'm going to squeeze, understand?" "What's the knife for then?" demanded Mark. "Insurance," came the reply "Now, you're going to hand me that envelope I saw you with in the pub tonight and you're going to do it now." After the first defiance of asking what the knife was for, Marks confidence had left him and he fumbled to get the envelope out of his inside pocket. He realised that it had been stupid not putting some cash in his wallet. He'd had the whole damn lot out in front of everyone in the pub! With shaking hands, he passed the envelope behind him to the man with the knife. "Please, please...don't hurt me." He begged. He'd never been mugged and he had no idea what the Hell was going to happen next. "Hurt you? You've been such a good boy, I'm not going to hurt you." Came the reply. Without the knife ever moving from his neck, a blindfold was slid over Marks eyes. He felt himself being turned round. His fear mounted and he thought he was going to wet himself and then...he felt the lightest kiss on his lips. Mark jumped in surprise. He hadn't known what to expect but this certainly wasn't it! However, if the choice was kissing another man or having his throat cut, Mark would kiss him and like it! After a few seconds, Mark heard a noise like a zip being unfastened and felt pressure on his shoulders. With a sinking feeling, he realised what his mugger wanted him to do. He wanted a blowjob and there was no way that Mark was going to get out of this. "I've never done this before," he whimpered "I'm not gay, I don't know what to do." "Well you'd better learn." Came the reply. Mark got to his knees and tried to remember what his girlfriend had done to him. He gave the cock in front of him a few, tentative licks. It wasn't too bad he thought. If he could get away with this and not have to do anything else, he'd be fine. He heard his attacker moan slightly and then whisper: "Take it into your mouth and suck it bitch! I'm gonna cum easy or hard. This is easy, you don't want to know what the hard way is!" Mark could figure out what the hard way was and there was no way he was doing that, knife or no knife. He took the semi-hard cock in his hand, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He remembered his girlfriend going down on him and tried to do the same. He gently sucked on the head and then moved his mouth part way down the shaft and began moving his head back and forth. He desperately wanted to look up and see what his assailant was doing but knew that if he made a move towards the blindfold, he risked getting his throat cut. He felt the man move slightly and hoped that he was nearly finished. He could taste pre-cum in his mouth and was convinced it wouldn't be long now. He sped up a bit to try and hurry the process up and felt the guys hand grip the back of his head, slowing him down. This bloke was going to drag it out! He was in the middle of an alley with people's bedroom windows looking down on him and this guy was making him go slower! There was nothing Mark could do but carry on. He tried letting his mind wander. He thought about his girlfriend and wondered if she had found giving blow jobs this bad. Surely not, surely she would have stopped if she didn't like it. Suddenly he realised that his mind had drifted to Tony. He imagined it was Tony's hand on the back of his head, Tony's heavy breathing above him and Tony's long, hard cock sliding in and out of his mouth. The shock of realising he was fantasising about a man almost made him stop but a warning grunt from above made him carry on. After several minutes, Mark felt the grip on his hair tighten and realised that his attacker was getting close to the edge. Before he knew it, the man was slamming his cock into Marks throat. He couldn't breathe and his gag reflex kicked in. He knew that if it didn't stop soon he would pass out. Stars burst in front of his vision and all he could hope for was that, once he had cum, the man would leave him alone. He prayed, for the first time ever, that his attacker would leave him alone if he collapsed and wouldn't do anything else. All of a sudden he heard a shout "What the Hell do you think you're doing?!" His attacker pulled his cock out Marks mouth and ran. Mark collapsed on the ground, fighting against the urge to vomit and gasping for breath. Footsteps approached him and he heard a familiar voice say "Shit, Mark, what happened? Are you OK?" and felt the blindfold being lifted. He opened his eyes and looked straight into the eyes of the last person he had thought he was going to see...it was Tony. Fear, Confusion...Love? Ch. 02 A week on from his attack in the alley way, Mark hadn't been out of the house. As far as he could see, his life was over. The money that he'd been saving was gone and so had his plans of travelling, his mother was on his case about him not leaving the house, he'd been orally raped by a weirdo mugger in an alley and, all of a sudden, he'd found himself attracted to a man he'd met once. He wasn't even fucking gay! He'd never thought about being with a man in his life and now he couldn't stop. Tony had been texting him all week asking how he was. Mark hadn't replied. He hadn't seen of spoken to anyone since he'd been attacked and Tony had stopped it. He'd brought him home and made sure he was OK before leaving but Mark hadn't been able to speak to him then and he couldn't now. Tony, meanwhile, hadn't stopped thinking about Mark either. He'd stood and watched while his new friend had been fucked in the mouth and (he could admit it to himself) he'd enjoyed it. Tony had been with a man once. It was a few years ago after a drunken party. He'd been curious and decided to give it a go. They'd given mutual blow jobs and then Tony had screwed the other guy in the arse. It had been amazingly tight but he figured it was nothing he couldn't get from a woman. He, like Mark, had no interest in men at all. He was straight through and through...but if he was, why was he feeling like this about Mark? Tony's phone beeped with a text. His heart skipped a beat when he saw it was from Mark. 'Why am I getting so excited about this?' he thought 'I must be crazy!' He picked up the phone and read the message carefully: 'Tony, just wanted to say thanks for the other night. Sorry not been in touch, was really confused. Pretty embarrassed that you saw that. Understand if you don't want to be mates. Mark' Without thinking, Tony grabbed his keys, got in his car and drove straight to Marks house. Marks mum let him in saying "If you can get him to snap out of this strop he's in, you're better than me!" she slammed off into the kitchen, muttering something about ungrateful kids. Tony walked up the stairs to Marks room and knocked on the door "Mum! I told you to leave me the fuck alone!" came the shout through the door "It's me" said Tony. After a few seconds, the door opened and Mark stood there. He stared at Tony, his eyes red. He clearly hadn't had a shave or a shower in days and looked like he hadn't slept either. Tony ached to hold him but knew it was the worst thing he could do and he still couldn't figure out why he felt like this. Mark had turned away and sat on the bed. He waved Tony to a chair in the corner and sat back, staring at him. After a couple of minute's silence, Mark spoke "Why are you here?" "I was worried about you. I hadn't heard from you and then I got your message and you seemed to think I wouldn't want to know you anymore" "Yeah well, you saw me doing that with a bloke and then I had my arms around you and I thought you might think I was coming on to you" Tony looked at him, trying to figure out what to say "I realised you were being attacked and when you got hold of me, I figured it was shock." He said. Mark looked at Tony in silence for a few moments and then looked away. When he spoke again it was in a quiet, far away voice "I'm not gay but I didn't get in touch because after that night, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I'm sorry. I think it was just like a whole saviour thing. I wanted you to keep hold of me and look after me and I thought I was gay. I'm sorry. I still do feel like that and I'm sorry! I'm so sorry but I don't know what to think!" In the silence that followed this outburst Mark heard Tony stand up and move across the room 'Fuck, what have I done? He's going to hate me and tell everyone what happened...I'm such a fucking moron!' Mark looked up and realised that Tony had shut the door and was stood looking at him. He held his breath, waiting for the negative reaction he expected. Tony took a deep breath and sat down beside Mark. He slowly put his arm around Marks shoulder and pulled him close until Marks head was resting on his chest. "I know" he said "I felt the same and I didn't know what to do. I've never been into other men...I mean, I experimented a few years ago but I never thought I'd feel like this about a man" Slowly, Mark raised his head and looked up into Tony's face. Tony leaned down to him and their lips met. They kissed gently and then laid on the bed running their hands over each other and kissing. Suddenly, Mark giggled. Tony looked at him with one eyebrow raised "What's so funny?" he asked "Just all this! I can't believe it! Last week I thought you were going to throw me off the rugby ground for using it as a short cut, then we became friends, then you rescued me and now we're lying here like a couple!" Tony smiled, "Yeah, it's a bit mental" he said "What are you going to do now? Go to uni?" Mark sat up, frowning "I can't go to uni yet" he said "I've missed the deadline for applications and I have no money, no car, no anything! I sold everything to raise money for my trip so I couldn't afford uni right now anyway...plus I have a good reason to stay around for a while" he smiled as he said the last bit and stroked the side of Tony's face. "If you hadn't said that last part, I think I could have got you a job!" laughed Tony "Seriously?" "Yep, I need a partner" Mark raised an eyebrow at Tony "That wasn't exactly what I had in mind!" he said Tony laughed again "I'm doing night security at the rugby club, we've had a lot of vandalism going on in the grounds so we've all taken on a bit of the security. I was between jobs and the committee decided to make the post a paid one. Thing is, they want to take someone else on as well so we can have someone in the office while the other one patrols." "Would they be alright with you asking if you can take a friend on?" asked Mark "Is that all I am?" replied Tony. Mark looked at him, unsure what to say. "I'm sorry, I'm just being silly. I don't know what to call this either!" Tony said. "The committee said that I can take on who I want, it's a 12 hour shift so I have to get on ok with the person I hire. It's crap pay but you get a shift allowance and, of course, the pleasure of my company for the evening!" Mark thought about the offer. He had nothing to lose. A job was a job and he'd be with his...friend. "Why not then? Sounds perfect for me. I can stay up with you all night and sleep all day and never have to see my damn mother!" "Cool, I'll get the paperwork sorted and you can fill it all in tonight. Just bring your bank details with you. Wear what you want, there's no uniform. In fact, the only rule is that you don't wear green; that's our rival's colours!" "Woah, what about an interview? An application form? Y'know, the usual stuff" exclaimed Mark. Tony leaned forward and kissed him. "Well, your interview went well and that was your application form" he grinned. Mark smiled, tonight was going to be a good night. Tony left shortly after telling him to try and get some sleep and saying he was going to the same. Mark went downstairs and his mother about his new job. Her response was a long tirade about him abandoning her and ending in her usual cry of "It's not fair!" Mark was used to this, he'd heard it nearly every day since his father had died. As far as his mother was concerned, she was the only one affected by his dad dying. She didn't seem to care or understand that losing a father hurt just as much as losing a husband. He let the words wash over him and tried not to hate her. Turning round, Mark went back to his room, locked the door and stretched out on his bed. He laid there a long time trying to sleep. His mind was full of thoughts of Tony, he wanted to go further than just kissing but he was scared too. He tried to imagine it and found himself getting hard. He ran his hand up and down his cock, pretending it was Tony doing it to him and felt a tingle run down his spine. His mind drifted back to the events of last week and the feeling of holding another man's dick in his mouth. Instead of the repulsion and loathing he'd felt just a few hours before, he remembered the feel and the taste and imagined that it was Tony who he'd been sucking. The thought of it felt so right that he came without warning. He licked the cum off his fingers, still pretending it was Tony. Then, he cleaned himself off, rolled onto his side and fell asleep. Marks alarm woke him at 6pm and he woke full of anticipation. He still didn't understand why he was feeling this way. He was still convinced he was straight and he couldn't figure out why he was feeling like this about another man. For once, he'd decided not to fight events, he was going to go with the flow and see where it led him. Mark was convinced that this was his shot at happiness and he was happy to see where the path took him. After a quick shower, he threw on a pair of jeans and a jumper. Going downstairs he raided the fridge for something to eat and grabbed a jacket. Reaching the front door, he froze. 'I have to go down the alley' he thought 'It's dark and I have to down the alley' Mark tried to will himself to move but he couldn't. The fear he was feeling consumed him. He couldn't move! Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Mark yelped and then heard a familiar, if muffled, voice "Mark, it's Tony" Mark opened the door and saw Tony standing there. Without thought, he stepped forward and reached for him. Tony grabbed Mark and pulled him into hug. Kissing Marks hair, he told him "I thought I'd come for you, I wouldn't make you walk down there by yourself. It's ok, I'm here." Mark leaned against him for a moment before stepping back "I'm ok" he said "We'd better stop, I'm not ready for anyone to...you know" "It's fine" Tony told him "I know what you mean, I can just imagine what your mother'd say if she found out!" Mark grinned at him, yelled goodbye over his shoulder and walked out the house. "She'd probably say I wanted to ruin her life by not giving her grandkids or something" At the entrance of the alley, Mark paused and took a breath. Tony looked around them and, seeing no one around, reached out and took hold of his hand "Come on" Together they walked hand in hand into the alley. After a few feet, Mark stopped. He let go of Tony's hand and put an arm round his waist instead. Tony smiled in the darkness and draped his arm across Marks shoulders. Neither of them spoke, they didn't want to break the mood. As they reached the end of the alley, they both left go of each other. There was nothing awkward about it, neither of them wanted to 'go public' yet, they weren't even sure what was going on! For now they were happy with what they had. This set the tone of the next week. Each day, Tony would come for Mark in the evening and they would walk arm in arm to work. Once there, Mark would stay in the office while Tony walked the grounds. He'd come back and he and Mark would spend the next few hours playing with each other. Over the course of a few days, they had gone from kissing and holding hands to touching each other. After a few days, Tony asked Mark if he could go down on him. Without hesitation, Mark agreed. It was the greatest experience of his life. To feel Tony's strong hands caressing his thighs while his soft lips wrapped around his cock. It was everything he'd imagined it could be. He came with a sigh that was more powerful than any scream or groan he could have made while coming and sat slouched in his chair for long moments, unable to speak. Shaking himself out of his trance, Mark turned to Tony and smiled "I think I should return the favour" he said "You, you don't have to." Stammered Tony "I know, after last time...I mean, I'll understand if you..." "Shut up" said Mark. He pushed Tony down onto a chair and slowly unzipped his trousers. Taking out Tony's already hard cock, he gasped. He smiled up at Tony and shyly said "I didn't realise you were so big" before Tony could respond Mark had taken the head into his mouth. He swirled his tongue around it and gentle nibbled the end. He was amazed at how easy it was and how turned on he was getting! He looked up and Tony through his eyelashes. Tony leaned his head back against his seat and groaned. Smiling to himself Mark flicked his tongue all over Tony's dick, he worked his way down to his balls and then gently sucked them into his mouth. Tony's gasps got louder and Mark moved his mouth back up Tony's cock to taste the pre-cum that was leaking out of him. Tony was getting louder and louder. Mark gently stroked his balls in one hand while using his other to wank Tony into his mouth. All the time he carried on sucking. Through gritted teeth, Tony moaned "Stop, stop, I'm gonna cum...Please...oh God...oh please!" Mark carried on. He slid Tony's cock further into his mouth until he felt like he was going to gag. Determined to take more, he carried on. Each time he tried, he got more into his mouth. Feeling Tony starting to buck his hips he clamped his lips around Tony's dick and felt the hot, salty cum flood his tongue. Sitting back, he swallowed what he good. Tony looked at him in amazement, "That was unbelievable! I've never felt anything like that!" Mark smiled. Cum had dripped out the corner of his mouth and he reached up to wipe it away. Tony stopped him, he reached out and gently ran his tongue over Marks lips, cleaning the last of his seed from his mouth. They kissed for what seemed an eternity and then laid together on the floor, holding each other. Mark looked up into Tony's eyes and realised that this was it, he was safe, he was happy... more happy than he had been in a long time. This was the new start he had wanted. It wasn't what he had expected, he had never thought that he would be fulfilled by another man but, right at this moment, he couldn't imagine anywhere he'd rather be, or anyone he'd rather be with. Fear, Confusion...Love? Ch. 03 Tony arrived home after his night shift with Mark. As usual these days he had a smile on his face as he lay down and drifted off with thoughts of Mark filling his mind. Tony had met Mark just over 3 weeks ago and his life had changed unbelievably! 3 weeks ago, Tony had been a typical 23 year old man. He was just over 6 feet, dark hair, green eyes and a body that had been honed to perfection by years of martial arts, football and (his newest passion) rugby. He'd had girlfriends all through his teenage years and more than a few one night stands but over the past few years, something had changed. At 20, Tony had gone to a mate's party and had far too much to drink. A guy he barely knew had asked him if he'd ever been with a guy and when Tony said that he hadn't, he offered himself on a plate! They'd gone into the bedroom where the guy had slowly slid Tony's trousers down and given him the most fantastic blow job Tony had ever had (up until recently)! This guy knew what another man wanted and the best way to give it. When he'd finished, Tony had been so in the moment that he'd returned the favour. It'd given him a major hard on, so when the man had asked Tony to fuck him, there was no need to ask twice. Tony hadn't hesitated, he pushed himself balls deep into another man's tight arse and ridden him like he was never going to fuck again! Since that night, Tony had never felt the same again. He'd been single for the past three years and, although he'd had a few one night stands, he'd never felt fulfilled by a woman since. That first afternoon when he'd met Mark had made him realise that maybe the reason he was feeling unfulfilled wasn't because he had a problem with women...maybe it was because he wanted men! He'd seen Mark taking a short cut through the back of the rugby club and gone to talk to him because there had been a problem lately with people littering and vandalising club property but when he'd seen Mark up close, he'd nearly started stammering like a school girl! Mark was the most beautiful person he'd ever seen. A few inches shorter than Tony with sandy blonde hair and deep blue eyes you could get lost in, he projected an innocence that had made Tony want to hold him and never let go. After the few drinks they'd had in the pub that afternoon, Tony had realised that Mark did need protecting, he just didn't realise it. Tony shook his head at the memory of Mark telling him about the envelope containing all his money and how he'd kept getting it out to pay for drinks. In the end, Tony had had to explain why it wasn't a good idea to be flashing the cash round a crowded bar and he'd been amazed at the stunned look on Marks face! For all that he thought he was worldly wise, he'd been shocked that people out there would take advantage. Tony had felt his heart melt when he saw the innocent amazement on Marks face. He'd wanted to kiss him right there in the middle of the pub and hide him away from the world. It had been Marks naivety that had led Tony to start flirting with him as they left the pub. He'd been convinced that nothing would come of it and doubted that Mark would even notice. Instead he'd found that Mark had flirted back in a way and even paused to think about it when Tony had made a comment about rugby players balls. He'd laughed off the suggestion but there had been a look in his eyes that had made Tony wonder. After they'd gone their separate ways, Tony had gone to a shop nearby to get some cigarettes and then headed back to the rugby club. It was his night off from guarding the place but he'd figured that he'd have quick check around just in case. It was as he'd been walking along the back fence; he'd heard a muted whimper and gone to check down the alley way behind the pitch. He hadn't a clue what he was going to find but wanted to make sure that nobody had tried to jump the fence and fallen (AGAIN!). Instead he found his friend on his knees with another man's cock in his mouth. He'd stood and watched for a few moments while his emotions collided. He'd felt turned on, disappointed and jealous all at once and then he'd felt guilty about the fact that being turned on was winning! All these thoughts had run through his mind all at once and it had lasted less than a minute before he saw the glint of metal that was a knife being held at Marks throat! Rage had swamped him as he'd ran towards the pair. Marks attacker had fled but Tony had caught a glimpse of him and had recognised him as one of the men that's had been in the pub earlier. He'd pulled the blindfold from Marks eyes and wrapped his arms around him. To his joy, Mark had responded by holding him just as tight. He hadn't let go all the way back to Marks house and had wanted to hold him all night. Instead he figured that it was just shock and relief that had caused Mark to hold him. In the week following that night, Tony had text Mark several times. He'd told himself that it was just to make sure that he was OK but he knew in his heart that it was more than that. The day he'd got a reply from Mark, his heart had leapt and, seeing the perfect excuse, he had gone round to see him. When Mark had confessed that he had feelings for Tony, Tony had thought he was going to shout out his pleasure. Instead they had started a relationship. In the weeks that followed, both the guys had fallen deeply for each other and had started to talk about the future. Despite not telling anyone about their relationship, they knew they wanted to stay together in the long term and had discussed plans to move in together. Mark didn't want to stay in the area; he was terrified that he would meet his attacker again one day. He also wanted to go to university and thought it would be the perfect opportunity for them; they could move away and live together as a couple where nobody would know them as anything other than a couple. Tony agreed but there was one thing he had to do first...REVENGE! The more Tony thought about seeking revenge for what had happened to Mark, the more he got wound up. The rage he was feeling was all consuming and he knew that he wasn't going to be able to rest while he was feeling like this. Getting up, he threw on some clothes, grabbed a towel and went for a jog to tire himself out. Jogging through the park, Tony spotted a familiar looking face; it was the guy who'd attacked Mark. Tony slowed and pretended to stretch as the man carried on walking. After a few moments, Tony followed him. He limped slightly so that anyone watching would think he had cramp and tailed the guy straight to his front door. Know he knew where he lived! The bloke had unlocked the door and left it open. Tony could see him turning the alarm off so he knew that he was home alone. Before he could think about it, Tony wrapped the towel around the lower half of his face, ran up the steps and through the door of the flat! "Who the fuck are you?!" Yelled the man "I'm the bloke who scared you off the young lad in the alley...and I've got something for you" replied Tony. "W-what? What are you going to...I mean, what are you talking about?" stammered the guy. "You know exactly what I mean. You forced your disgusting little prick into my boyf... that lads mouth so I think it's time for a bit of like for like, don't you?" The man opened his mouth to say something else but Tony didn't want to hear it. He pushed him down onto the stairs and kicked the door shut behind him. The guy tried to rise but Tony punched him in the side of the head, knocking him out. Looking down on the man, Tony started to panic about what he was doing but the thought of what this guy had done to Mark spurred him on. Anger washed over him again and an idea came to him. If this guy wanted a man then that's what he was going to get. Picking up the unconscious man, Tony made his way upstairs to the bedroom and threw him on the bed. Going to the wardrobe he found some ties, undressed the guy and fastened his hands to the headboard. Making sure there was no way his hands were going to come loose, Tony pushed the mans ankles over his head and fastened them beside his hands. A thought occurred to him: What if this guy didn't live by himself? Tony frantically checked the drawers and wardrobe in the room and didn't find anything to indicate anyone else lived there. However, he did find a pack of condoms and some lube in the drawer by the bed. "That should come in handy" he said to himself with a smile. Settling down on the bed beside his unconscious victim, Tony decided to amuse himself by going through the mans wallet. Finding a driving licence, he discovered that his new 'friend' was called James and he was 32. Before long, James started to stir. Tony watched him wake to the realisation that he was totally immobilised and naked and there was some nutcase sat on his bed who wanted revenge. "Awake are we?" asked Tony "What are you planning on doing?" asked James fearfully "Well, you wanted a man and that's what you're going to get" Smiled Tony. Tony removed his clothes and kneeled on the bed at James' arse. He felt himself getting hard. Smearing some of the lube onto his fingers, he began to stroke them against James' arsehole. James flinched away and whimpered "What are you doing?" "I've already told you and I'm sick of answering your questions. Now, you're going to answer some of mine" snapped Tony "Are you a virgin?" "N-no, I-I've had a few girlfriends" Tony smacked his arse, hard and growled "Have you ever had a man?" "No...Oh God, please don't. Please don't hurt me! I'm not gay! I don't want you to..." "QUIET! Do you think that young lad 'wanted' you to rape his mouth? Do you think I care if you're gay? NO! You gave that lad a choice; he told me that you said you were going to cum the easy way or the hard way. Now, you aren't getting that choice." All the time Tony was saying this, a small part of him was protesting. This wasn't like him! He had never been into this sort of thing and couldn't believe he was doing it now! He told himself that it must be for the love of Mark that he was behaving this way. Tony looked down at James and saw he was crying. His desire for revenge started to fail but he thought of Mark and what this man had done to him. He rolled on a condom, stroked some lube along his cock and realised that he was harder than he'd ever been before. Pressing the head against James' tight hole he smiled "Do you have anything you want to say?" "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! I have the money, please, take it! It's under the bed in a box! Please! Please, don't hurt me! Please!" Tony hesitated; he could take the money and leave. James was scared enough, he wasn't going to try anything again and Tony didn't want to be the kind of person that this act would make him. He glanced down at James and saw a smirk on his face; he thought he was off the hook! Once again Tony felt himself get angry, he wanted to hurt this bastard! This thieving shit-bag who thought he could get away with anything just by saying sorry! He drove his cock into James' arse, loving the feeling of being in such a tight little hole. James squealed and tried to pull away. He was writhing around trying to pull away but his struggles just turned Tony on more. Tony gripped James' waist and pushed himself in until his balls were pressed up against James. "Do you like that?" he snarled "Does it make you feel good?" "Oh God, please, take it out! It's too big, please! Please! Oh fuck! You're going to kill me! Oh please!!!" "You thought you could force yourself on someone else, you must like it. You wanted my boy on his knees for you, you wanted him to be your bitch and now it's your turn!" Pulling back slowly, Tony drove himself back into James. Over and over. James became incoherent. His pleas became moans, the moans became sobs and the sobs turned into silence. Tony continued drilling James' arse, oblivious to anything the feeling of a virgin arse hole wrapped around his throbbing cock. Slowly, Tony became aware of the silence in the room and looked down at James. He'd blackout! Tony's hard on began to fail as he realised what he had done and how much pain he had caused. Pulling out, he saw that James was bleeding. He had to get out of here! Tony grabbed another tie and used it to cover James' eyes and then pulled the towel off his face. He quickly dressed and then used the towel to wipe over every surface he could think of that he'd touched and then went to the bathroom to flush the used condom down the toilet. Checking that James was still out of it, he untied his arms and legs, reached under the bed to get Marks money and then ran downstairs to let himself out. By the time he got home, Tony was shaking. He couldn't believe what he'd done! He'd raped a man, what sort of person did that make him? He already knew the answer though. It made him the sort of man that would go to any lengths for the person he loved. He couldn't wait to tell Mark what had happened. He could just imagine the look on his face when he gave Mark the money back. Maybe he wouldn't tell him everything though. He would tell him about everything leading up to the rape, just say that he'd scared the guy into giving Marks money back. Tony couldn't wait to see Mark that night; it was going to be fantastic! Fear, Confusion...Love? Ch. 04 Tony practically skipped into work that evening. He was so excited. He was going to be able to tell Mark he had his money back AND that the guy who'd attacked him was going to be far too scared to go after anyone else! "You're looking happy" smiled Mark as Tony walked into the office "I am! I have some great news!" said Tony grabbing Mark and kissing him. "Woah, chill out! What's going on?" Mark laughed Tony pulled the envelope containing Marks cash out of his jacket. "Here" he said, handing it to Mark "What's this?" "It's your money" "What money?" "The money that James stole!" "Who the fuck is James?!" asked Mark Tony laughed again and started to tell Mark what had happened that afternoon. He'd decided to refrain from telling Mark the whole truth. Not that he wanted to have any lies in their relationship, but this wasn't a 'lie' exactly, it was more 'economical truth telling'. He had just got to the part where he had tied James to the bed when he realised that Mark had gone white! "What? I didn't DO anything to him, just scared the bastard" said Tony, lying through his teeth. "I don't care whether you 'did' anything to him or not! What the Hell did were you thinking? Do you have any idea what it's like to be frightened like that? To have somebody taking away your freedom? Your will?" Tony was stunned. This wasn't the reaction he had expected. He'd pictured Mark being excited, happy. He'd thought that it would prove what Mark meant to him. Before he could say anything, Mark continued talking. "I hate that guy, I hate what he did to me but he was just a faceless memory. He was a thing, not a person and now, because of you, I have to face up to the fact that he's like me. He gets scared, he's not a monster, he's like me or you or anyone else" "You hate what he did to you? If it wasn't for him, we wouldn't be together!" Stormed Tony "I did this for you! I lowered myself for you!" "You didn't just scare him, did you?" asked Mark quietly Tony paused. He knew that he couldn't lie. He didn't know what had given it away but it was obvious that Mark knew. His silence said it all to Mark. "You raped him. You did to him what he did to me but you did it worse." Mark stated flatly "I can't deal with this. I'm leaving." Tony was frozen. He felt like a pit had opened up inside him and every good thing in his life was falling into it. He hadn't expected this, he'd wanted to bring things full circle and make Mark feel safe again but in a matter of moments, his life had come crashing down around his ears. When Tony had handed the envelope to Mark, it felt like a pit had opened in his stomach. He knew that there was only one way that Tony had got the money back and that was to confront the man who had attacked him. As Tony had recounted the tale of what had happened, Mark had felt a growing certainty that he knew what Tony had done. Although Tony had tried to skirt around the details, Mark had known and, even though he knew deep down what Tony had done, he could still hardly believe it. At least when he had asked Tony what had happened; he'd had the good grace not to lie about it. He hadn't said anything and that had been enough of a confession. Every feeling that Mark had tried to keep under wraps since the attack had come flooding back. He'd tried to tell Tony but hadn't been able to find the words to explain himself so he'd left. It had broken his heart but he'd had to go. A week passed and Mark was still in a daze. Tony had tried to call him every hour of the day and had even been round to the house. Mark had told his mother that he didn't want to see him but hadn't told her why or anything about the relationship they'd had. His mother had been more than happy to turn Tony away. Mark had been more attentive to her and spent all his time with her. Deep down she knew he was hurting over something but she didn't care, her boy was in her pocket once again and if he didn't want to leave the house, so much the better in her mind! Mark knew that this wasn't healthy, he had to get away. He had to go somewhere where he could leave the house without seeing Tony or anything that reminded him of him. In a few months time he could reapply to university and move away but that wasn't soon enough. However, he had the money that Tony had got back for him and it was rightfully his. Mark came to a decision. Reaching for his phone, he called an old school friend who had moved about 200 miles away to ask if he could stay with him for a while. Steve had been one of those guys at school who people knew but didn't want to get to know properly as he was a little odd. Mark had always felt sorry for the guy and had made an effort to get to know him. In private, Steve was fun, outgoing and generally a top bloke, in public he was painfully shy and had a habit of staring at people in a kind of intense way which made others uncomfortable talking to him. Steve was ecstatic to hear from Mark. He'd always been a loner until Mark had come along and they'd got on great. In fact, Steve had had a crush on Mark for years but there was no way he was going to tell him. He hadn't been able to tell anyone at home that he was gay and so he'd chosen to move far enough away to live his life in his own way. The only link he'd been bothered about breaking was the one with Mark and now he was coming to live with him for a while! Mark put the phone down with a smile on his face and then realised that he was going to have to tell his mother. He went downstairs and told her that he was going to stay with a friend for a few days. She took it rather well, even offered to take him to the station. Mark was amazed that she was being like this 'Are you OK with me going mum?' he asked 'Of course son, it'll do you good to get out and it's only a few days, isn't it?' 'Umm...yeah, well, it might be a bit longer, maybe a week' 'As long as it's no longer than that. I'm by myself you know. Since your father died....' Mark felt himself start to tune her out. He'd heard this speech so many times. There was no way he was going to tell her that he wasn't planning on coming back just yet. Let her get used to him being away and he'd cross that bridge when he came to it! Three days later and Mark was on his way to the train station. He'd written Tony a long letter explaining that he was going and wouldn't be back and he'd tried again to put into words why Tony's revenge had hurt him so much. Not wanting to bump into Tony, Mark posted it to the rugby club and knew it wouldn't arrive until he was long gone. Looking at the window, he wondered when or if he'd ever be comfortable coming back here but that was a thought for a long time in the future. He didn't have to think about right now, he just had to look forward to starting a new life and that was good enough for now.