2 comments/ 7702 views/ 9 favorites Barriers Ch. 01 By: ThingsYouWouldBelieve Authors note: If you're looking for a story to get off to you're probably in the wrong place. I'm starting by building up the characters and seeing where I want it to go. Hope you enjoy it! ******** "Good morning and welcome back everyone." My Homeroom teacher Mr. Kelber put down a stack of papers on his desk, I assumed it was our schedules. "You've been here for 3 years, you know the deal by now. When your name is called come grab your schedule and locker number. I don't care what you do after that just don't get me into trouble. Jason Andrews." I got up from the back of the class and walked up. "You're out of here by noon every day. You must really hate this place Jason." He chuckled. I shrugged, he wasn't wrong but I didn't really feel like talking with a strong hangover from last night. "Locker 294-A, that's the top one." Kelber handed me my schedule and a lock. I nodded. "The school year just started and you're already a mess Andrews. Some things never change huh?" I shrugged again. I didn't really care what anyone thought of me even if they were right. I walked to the back, picked up my backpack and jacket and went to my locker. I should probably introduce myself. My names Jason Andrews, I'm 18, a senior at Woodrow Wilson High in the middle of Pennsylvania. I'm 5'5''. White and 120 pounds, no real muscle anywhere, Black short hair, green eyes, overall I'm a pretty average looking kid. Today I'm wearing a generic red hoodie, tight black shirt and some black jeans. That's where the average ends however because I'm actually a gigantic mess personality wise, as if the hangover didn't already hint to it. I was bullied a lot when I was younger to the point where I would break down alot. Nobody was looking to be friends with me either with the bullying and psychotic episodes so I found myself alone a lot when I was younger. It didn't help that my parents were never home thanks to their business and I would find myself crying myself to sleep alone more often than not. With such a shitty childhood I had to find a way to cope obviously. Thankfully (or unfortunately as it may be), my father despite his lack of presence in the house liked to keep his liquor cabinet stocked and there was always a carton of menthol cigarettes somewhere from whatever country my parents had just flow out of. It doesn't take a genius to figure out how to smoke and drink, especially in the days of the internet; so between the availability and the need to cope I began a rather unhealthy lifestyle at the beginning of 8th grade. High school is where it got better I suppose. By the end of middle school I had picked up the reputation of being a smoker and drinker. This led my former bullies and tormentors to try and befriend me with my access to beer and such. Now you would think I would accept all these new people are friends with open arms and my life would be better for it. I told everyone to fuck off. If they didn't want to be my friend at my worst I sure as hell didn't want their company now. I suppose it was a result of being forced to cope with my problems when I was younger by shutting myself off from the world and thinking I needed to keep the same mentality. This trend continued into my freshman year of high school. I even evolved into a bully of sorts myself, making innocent white girls cry for no reason other than I wanted to. Eventually my reputation turned into an unstable asshole that you didn't mess with because it never ended well for you. The high school had me in the counselor's office at least once a day to "talk out my problems". It was cute how they decided to care now that I was one causing trouble instead of being the victim of it. I threw my bag and coat into my locket slammed it shut and pulled out my pack of cigarettes as I headed for the door. I knew exactly where I could get away with smoking in this school, today was going to be an old dirt path kids used to use to get home in like the 90's. It's no longer used because there's an easier path after they knocked down a bunch of trees to make room for condos a couple years ago. I pushed the door open making sure nobody was trying to follow me and walked towards the path. "JASON ANDREWS STOP RIGHT THERE!" I froze, thinking I was already in trouble on day 1. I rolled my eyes and turned around only to find my friend laughing her ass off as she came running towards me. "Jenna you're such a bitch I hate you so much." "Same hun." She kissed me on the cheek and squeezed me. "Give me a cigarette I ran out this morning." I met Jenna Peterson in sophomore year, I was smoking on my way to school and she came up on my side and asked to bum one. I handed her the rest of my pack and told her to leave me alone. This was her cue to tell me her life story apparently, how she had just moved to town from Cali, everyone was boring and she heard about my reputation and wanted to get to know me. Naturally I told her to fuck off again. Jenna wouldn't give up so easily however and bothered me about anything and everything to and from school. Eventually I gave in and started explaining my entire childhood to her, expecting her to run like everyone else did when they find out about me. She didn't budge however and quickly became the person I talked to about everything. I'm glad she didn't run away like everyone else; that someone in the world cared about my stupid ass. She didn't want anything out of my except being me...ok that's not completely true sometimes she would have me bully some bitch who called her out on being weird on occasion, but I gladly obliged as she was really the only person who ever worried about me on a personal level. "I gave you a pack on Sunday, how did you smoke an entire pack in 3 days?" "Yeah I need to talk to you about something, now give me a cig and let's go we have like 20 minutes before class." I immediately stopped. "Tell me right now." She pouted and did her best impression of being innocent. Jenna honestly was really hot.18, 5' 1", short natural platinum blonde hair, clear brown eyes, double D's, tight body from going to the gym. She chose to wear tight blue jeans and the school hoodie, zipped up to her chest so her low cut shirt could hang out. If I was into girls I'd be all over that. That wasn't our relationship however and we both knew it so it wasn't that big of a deal. "Come on Jenna you know how much I hate not being told things up front." "Well..." "Just spit it out I've only ever been mad at you when you kept secrets from me." "Fine I'm dating someone on the soccer team." "Why in the fucking world would I care about that?" I threw my arms up utterly confused why she wasn't just telling me everything at once. She took a deep breath. "Now don't be mad..." "I'm mad that I'm standing here waiting for some irrelevant news when I could be smoking." "Mark Houston." My eyes opened wide. "Yeah... see this is what I was afraid of." I regained my composure and moved forward. "It's fine as long as he doesn't hurt you or come anywhere near me." "Jason I've been dating him for a few weeks now and I didn't know how to tell you." She caught up to me. "He knows what he did to you when you guys were young was wrong and he feels really guilty about it..." "MY ASS HE DOES. L O L JENNA YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME" We were finally out of sight of the school so I lit my cigarette and tossed her the pack. "Jason..." she touched my arm with her unoccupied hand trying to comfort me. "Jenna stop. It's fine that you're dating the guy that sent me into psychotic fits in school. I'm being completely serious too don't feel guilty about it. That doesn't change my opinion of him however and I will never forgive him for what he did to me." She took a drag and sighed. "It's just shitty is all." "Life's shit then you die." "Always the positive one." "Piss off bitch." "Ok hun, thanks for taking the news better than I thought you would. Meet you here for lunch?" "Yeah sure, just don't bring any unwanted guests." I glared at her making sure it was perfectly clear I didn't want that meathead anywhere near me. "Alright no problem." She came over and hugged me again. "Need anything just text me." She waved goodbye and she ran back to school. It wasn't a secret she was running to catch her boyfriend before class and I made sure when she looked back at me that I wasn't angry. That all changed as soon as she was out of sight and in the building. "GOD FUCKING DAMNIT." I'm pretty sure kids on the other side of the school could heard me shouting. "ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?" I punched a tree while smoking another cigarette. Houston was my main bully throughout my childhood. It all started in 4th grade, he befriended me and we hung out on a regular basis for a few weeks. He frequented my house and we would just play video games all day. That all changed on the night of June 15th, he invited me to "hang out with all his other friends". Little did I know that was all a ruse to humiliate me. "Jason get over here!" We were in the woods by his place just throwing around rocks and sticks. I ran over confused. "Whats up?" I was just a stupid naive kid wondering what was going on. "Do me a favor and grab my hoodie. Jack tossed it over there for no reason." He pointed to a gray sweatshirt hanging on a low branch a ways away. "No problem." I jumped over some logs and reached over for it. "GET HIM!" As soon as I turned around to see what was going on I found myself being pelted with water balloons left and right. I shielded my face and waited out what seemed like an hour of people laughing and chucking water balloons at me. When it finally ended I looked up at Houston ready to cry. "Yeah cry you stupid baby, that's all you know how to do. Wahh Wahhh." He turned around with all his friends and they all just walked away laughing, leaving me there to process what had just happened. I ran home crying the entire way. I couldn't believe someone I had made my best friend had just thrown me away to be a victim of a prank. The next day it all became clear when once again I was the victim of their non-stop insults. Houston had quickly turned from being nice and understanding into a coldhearted bully. This abuse kept up throughout middle school, it's the main reason I became such a terrible person. I threw away my cig and walked back to my locker to look at my schedule. First period was English with Ms. Cantera, a nice way to start my day. I sprayed some body spray on myself to mask the tobacco and walked to room 205. "Jason why are you late? It's the first day for crying out loud." "Problems." I was still clearly hung over as I talked to my English teacher of 4 years. She sighed knowing talking about it any further would be a waste of her time. "Row 3 seat 5. Please be quick so I can talk about the upcoming year." I wandered over to my seat and put my head down. I didn't really care what she had to say about the upcoming school year, I would get the minimum work done for a C and that was that. I didn't care enough about high school, my parents were loaded and I could get into any college I wanted if they threw enough money the college's way. This was all just filler. "Hey Andrews." I turned my head and there was stupid Houston. "Piss off Jenna told me and I want nothing to do with you." "Come on man it's pretty serious between us and I need to clear the air with you." "Fuck off." "Just give me 5 minutes I swear that's all I want." "FUCK OFF OK?" "Jason and Mark is there anything you want to share with the rest of the class?" Houston turned his head away shutting up. "Yes Judy, Mark over here wants to apologize to me for tormenting me throughout middle school and going as far as to put me into suicide watch a couple of times!" I laughed a bit. "Jason you know better to not call me by my first name and you definitely know that isn't the place or time for something like that. Disrespect me again and we can have a nice conversation together after school today." "Sorry Ms. Cantera..." Houston mumbled I just smiled at her and moved my hand to signal to continue whatever she was going on about. She knew I was more or less a lost cause so she left me alone as long as I did my work. The class went by rather quickly as it was your usual first day nonsense. I wouldn't have even been in class if it was any other teacher but I knew she would have called the vice principal immediately if I didn't show up. When the bell rang I was the first one up and B-lined for the door only to be grabbed by Houston. Persistent piece of shit, he clearly had a hidden motive as he had well over 5 years to apologize for being a terror. I assumed it had to do with Jenna. I turned around. Despite my incredible hatred for him I had to admit that Houston looked good today. Styled short black hair, dark blue eyes and he clearly took time to trim his beard today. He was wearing his soccer shirt because of the after school activities fair today and he was running the booth. I could see he took some serious work over the summer to grow his arms and shoulders out as they looked fantastic. I could see why Jenna started dating him now. I snapped back to reality realizing I was drooling over the guy who made my childhood a living hell. "Holy fuck what don't you understand about fuck off?" "Jason it's my birthday today and i wanna invite you..." "Are you fucking serious right now?" I had completely forgotten Houston was turned 18 today "Look it's just..." "JUST FUCKING WHAT YOU THINK AN APOLOGY WILL MAKE EVERYTHING OK?" "No. I never said that." "Well I don't care about anything you have to say. You don't need my permission to date Jenna, she's allowed to make her own decisions and I'm not the type of person to lose my best friend over some stupid fucking meathead. Do what you want I don't care just know I will never be nice to you, you're a gigantic piece of shit and always will be to me." "Alright." I walked away and rustled in my pocket to get my phone out. Quickly texted Jenna what had just happened and reaffirmed my stance with her. She sent me a frown emoji in response and I rolled my eyes. Noon came around and I waited for Jenna like I said I would. I decided I wanted chipotle for lunch and wanted to see if she wanted to come. As expected she started walking up the trail with her lighter in her hand signaling me to pull out my pack of smokes. "Let's go to chipotle." "I still have 2 classes Jason not all of us have parents that will pay for their kid to go anywhere." "Yeah yeah you and your responsibility." "I promise tomorrow we'll get lunch when my break is longer but I just can't today ok?" She came over and squeezed me like she always does. "You aren't lying to me so you can spend lunch with your boyfriend right?" "I would never you know me far better than that." She was telling the truth, Jenna had no issues being honest with people, me especially. I tossed my cigarette and waved her off. "Jason..." I knew exactly what was coming. "Look we went over this earlier today, I don't care. Do what you want with him. Marry him for all I care just know I will never forgive him." And with that I walked away to my house to get my car. I didn't live far from the High School, a 5 minute walk at the very most. It would take me longer to get out of the parking lot if I drove so I just walked every day. It was a crisp day as cliché as that sounds, trees were shedding their leaves and there was a gentle breeze helping them along, it was nice. As I turned the corner to my house I noticed an all too familiar car parked out front of it. There was Jonathan Han waiting for me with his signature stupid fucking grin on his face. "Hey babe." "I'm not your babe fuckwad. What are you doing here?" I walked up to him in confusion. I met Jon in my junior year. I had gotten detention for mouthing off to my gym teacher about how he would totally fuck some bitch in my class and pass her because of it. Jon was there for god knows what and sat down right next to me. He was wearing his varsity basketball jacket and some grey sweatpants. Jon was your typical Jock. He wasn't built like Houston was but he was definitely toned and took care of himself. He had the typical Asian face and black hair and eyes. "Whats up?" That was the first time I saw his grin. "The hell do you want?" I pretended to do homework and not give him any attention "What I can't say hi?" He took the notebook I was writing in and read it. "Ahh history, I can't stand this shit I don't know how you can read it." "Give me back my fucking notebook Jon." "What this?" He threw it out the window right next to him. "You don't need this right now." He smirked again. "What the actual fuck do you think you're doing?" I was clearly ready to raise hell. "Look Jason I'm not afraid of you like everyone else is. I just wanna talk to the guy that I find cute. Give me like 10 minutes of your time then I'll reach outside and let you get back to the Native Americans or whatever bullshit you were reading about." "I..." Did Jon just say he thought I was cute? "There we go, ok here's the deal I wanna take you out to dinner after this. Meet me out front and I'll drive and take care of everything. You don't need to dress up or anything I just wanna get to know you. You're really interesting Jason you should value yourself a lot more than you do." I sat there and crossed my arms and tried to figure out his motives. Why the hell was this guy asking me out on a date in detention of all places with everyone listening in? I didn't even know Jon was bi before this moment. Why is he using all these stupid lines as if I'm some girl? Why are they working? "Alright, I guess I have nothing better to do with Jenna at the gym." "Sounds great. Lemme get your notebook." Jon hopped up on the ledge and stuck his upper body out the window to grab my notebook off the grass. "Here ya go. Remember just meet me out front in 40 minutes when this shits over. Enjoy your homework I guess." He got up and walked away to go talk to his friends. Less than an hour later I sat at the front of school with a cigarette in my hand waiting on Jon. He pulled up in his BMW and rolled down his window. "You can smoke in my car I don't care get it." I obliged and hopped right in. "So where are you taking me?" "My parent's restaurant, I figure we can sit at a booth undisturbed while I get to know you a bit." He turned to me and chuckled "God you're so cute." "Ok what the fuck is up are you gay or bi? Why the sudden interest in me when you could fuck any cheerleader you want?" "Woah there." Jon looked left to see if he could merge onto the road. "First off I'm Bi you caught me. Second I think you're cute and just asked you on a date, it isn't that big of a deal after all you did say yes." I loosened up and looked back forward. I wasn't used to being pursued, especially in such a fast manner. "Sorry...I guess you just threw me for a loop." "Look I know you've had a rough couple of years but just know I'm not trying to use you or pull off a prank. I just wanna get to know you on a date. I swear. Oh hey look we're here." Jon's family's place was an above average Chinese restaurant. One of those places you would go Brunch on a Sunday. It looked nice and definitely felt like they had more food than General Tso's Chicken and Beef and Broccoli. When we walked in, Jon yelled something in Chinese at his mom and she came over. "Hi! I'm Ming." His mom had an adorable Chinglish accent to it. "Are you his new girlfriend?" "Uhh what?" "Mom I know how supportive you are of me but can you not embarrass me immedatley?" Barriers Ch. 01 They went back and forth in Chinese for a bit then Jon told me to go sit at a booth while he takes care of ordering. I sat down and pulled out my phone. Jenna had texted me about 30 times since I told her that I was going out on a date. "Are you ok?" "If he pulls anything stupid call me immedatley." "Seriously be careful." "You there?" I laughed as I saw the level of panic that she was currently in. I quickly texted her back that I was fine and she was on emergency dial if anything went wrong. As soon as I finished the text Jon slid into the other side of the booth. "I ordered noodles and chicken. I wasn't sure about your diet so I didn't get anything weird don't worry." He really did have an incredible smile. "I can eat anything, I travel with my parents all over the world in the summer." "Oh so that's why you're never here in the summer. I was talking to Jenna about you and she wouldn't give me details about your whereabouts now I know." "Yeah well she thinks you're up to no good so good luck getting her approval if you wanna go any further." I looked at another 5 messages from her. "Put your phone away I wanna get to know you not her." I threw my phone in my hoodie pocket and started talking to Jon about me and my life so far. We talked about music and our hobbies. He was into Electronic Music as much as I was which was a very nice surprise. I told him about all the festivals I couldn't wait to attend. We finished up dinner and sat there talking about plans for the future as Jon had just turned 18 a couple weeks ago. I looked down at my phone and realized we had been talking for well over two hours. "I think it's about time to get going as much fun as this was." "Oh so you had fun?" "A lot more than I thought I would have with you honestly." "Wanna go back to your place and keep the night going?" "Look I'm not trying to lose my virginity to the first guy to take me on a date." "Oh I'm your first? I had no idea." He said very sarcastically. "You're really helping your case here Jon." "I'm not trying to get into your pants unless you want me to Jason, I'm just saying I have nothing else to do tonight and we can go back to your place and watch Netflix, I'm not trying to be your boyfriend just yet because I know you're not ready. Hell you're leaving for England for a month when school lets out anyways. I'm just looking for a friend and certainly won't say no if you wanna take things further." Jon got up to clean up the plates. "Not all of us are douchebags like Mark. I hope I showed you that today." He walked away and give me a minute to myself. This really was a strange feeling, someone making friends with me out of the blue. I was still pretty skeptical but I figure it can't hurt with Jenna looking out for me. "So is my night with you ending here or are we off to your place?" "I think this is where you drop me off at home and we call it a night." "Aww that's a shame. At least you honestly enjoyed yourself right?" "Yes Jon I promise I had a great time." Jon shouted something in Chinese at his mom and grabbed his keys and motioned me back to his car. Since that date I've seen Jon a couple of times. He's been over my place with Jenna and we sat around and watched TV. I was very cautious with him but slowly but surely he was growing on me. I hadn't seen him since I came back from England in August so it was a real surprise to see him here now. "Well you never told me when you were coming back from England so I had no idea where you were." Jon moved from his car closer to me. "I missed you a lot Jason..." "Why on earth did you miss me of all people?" "Because I can't do this to just anyone." And with that he grabbed me, pressed my back against my house and kissed me. Barriers Ch. 02 I just stood there as Jon kissed me with no real reaction and he sucked on my lips like a vaccum. He didn't invade my mouth because he knew better. He just worked on my lips for a good 30 seconds before finally pulling off. "God you're so fucking cute Jason. I'm sorry if I stepped over the line but I just couldn't help myself after not seeing you in person for so long." He turned around, put his arms behind his head and looked up at the noon sky. I was still just standing there, trying to process my first kiss. It was nice, but it certainly wasn't what I expected. "I...uh..." "Yeah I'm pretty great I know." That comment snapped me back to reality. "What the actual fuck Jon? Why are you so infatuated with me? You were fucking 3 girls last year while you were trying to get into my pants. What happened to them?" My blood boiled at his arrogance. "How did you find out?" "Jenna really fucking hates you if you haven't caught on yet. She doesn't trust you and she lets me know what you're doing when you aren't putting on this act for me." "You still think it's an act? Christ man you have some real demons down there." He turned back around and came closer to me, he picked up my chin and stared directly into my eyes. "Sorry again if you think this is some act to get into your pants but it's not. It's been well over half a year since I first took you out. If I was looking for a fuck I would of just hit up one of the sluts in my phone, in fact I did for a while but nowadays I'm just looking to get to know myself before we all move off to college" I slapped his hand away and walked up the steps to my house. "Oh so I'm just some experiment to you? Fuck off." "Poor wording sorry what I mean is..." "No Jon fuck off I'm not some fucking toy that you can experiment your sexuality on." I was on the verge of shouting at this point. "Get out of here and don't fucking talk to me ever again, whatever shitty experiment you tried on me has clearly failed. Maybe you can go find some stupid closeted nerd to use." "Jason hold on..." I slammed the door and that was that. My head was spinning from the rage. I walked over to my kitchen to take a seat. As soon as I sat down I saw an envelope with my name on it. As I mentioned my parents were never around as they had some multi-million dollar business to take care of all over the world. Something about insurance and investing, I never really paid attention because they did the same to me. I opened the envelope and started to read the letter enclosed. "Hey Champ, We're off to Texas for the next two weeks so we'll be missing your birthday. Sorry for the inconvenience we hope that the money enclosed will make up for it. Have a party while we're away and just call the Housekeeper the next day. We trust you. Mom and Dad" I rolled my eyes. Why would they be here for my 18th birthday on Friday? When have they ever been here for anything? I opened the envelope wide and found the check they left. They left me a grand. This was par for the course really. I could have anything I wanted if I asked except for the one thing I ever wanted from them. My home was hardly broken, my parents just thought that making money for our future was more valuable than raising me. I had several nannies when I was growing up and they were always cold and unfeeling. Just stupid bitches coming to do their job every day and leaving at night. That stopped around 8th grade when I could "take care of myself" as my parents said. After that there was just some housekeeper that came by while I was at school every other day. I've grown to accept their decisions because of how little say I had in them, it was just pure shit however. I folded the check into my wallet and walked over to the liquor cabinet. Dad restocked the cabinet before he left again. I have no idea why he does this when I drink 80% of it myself but I'm not one to complain. I pulled out some grey goose vodka and poured a shot to calm my nerves. Everything was shit as usual and I genuinely didn't know any other way to cope except drink. Jenna was dating the guy that made my childhood a living hell, Jon drove me insane with his motives and to top it all off my parents still didn't understand how little money matters to me if I could just have a nice meal with them. I texted Jenna what happened with Jon, took another shot, picked up my keys and headed for my Lexus. Might as well get some food before I shut down completely. The town of Astrin wasn't a small hick town like you normally see in the middle of Pennsylvania. We had Plainvell road with everything you could possibly want on it. There was a large park on one end and an even bigger shopping center on the other, with random assorted shops and restaurants in between. The chipotle was in the shopping center so it was about a 10 minute drive. I parked near the front so I didn't have to walk very far. The mission was grab a burrito and head home. After years of alcoholism combined with a shitty diet led me to knowing how to control my movements and speech while drunk, at least I thought so. I wasn't that drunk right now honestly, it was only 2 shots so interacting with the Chipotle workers wasn't that much of a struggle. Somewhere between picking up my food and walking to my car I decided it was too far for my stomach so I found a bench and ate my proportionally large lunch. I hated eating honestly, it's why I was so thin. I didn't take care of myself in any way shape or form but between the cigarettes curbing my appetite and the booze knocking me out I just didn't care to feed myself very much. Sitting down for a meal by myself was something I dreaded heavily because it was my worst nightmare, me alone with my thoughts. Today my thoughts were primarily occupied by Jon. What an asshole he was. Jenna warned me about anything and everything Jon did to deter me away from him, and she ended up being right. I don't know why I didn't listen and let him play with my mind. I regretted giving him any form of attention, now I'll always have to remember that he was my first kiss. Halfway through the burrito I felt disgusting and threw out the rest. It was a combination of my thoughts, the food and the vodka and I knew I couldn't eat anymore. I glanced at my phone for the time, "2:15". Jenna would be out of class soon and probably stop by to make sure I hadn't killed myself so I should probably head home. I probably had time for another drink if I hurried up. Another ten minutes later I got home safe, I drive buzzed more than I would like to admit so I've gotten really good at it. The key is to take things slow so you have time to make small reactions. I threw my keys on the table by the door and walked back into the kitchen. My house was pretty big for the area. Ground floor consisted of a living room, dining room and kitchen like I imagine every other house of this size. My living room was never used. Pristine white rug, 2 leather couches that look like they had been used no more than twenty times in the ten years they had been there, a glass coffee table and various paintings and potted plants to make sure the room looked full. The housekeeper did a nice job of changing out the plants every couple of weeks to keep it fresh should my parents actually choose to spend more than a day at home. In the corner was my dad's liquor cabinet. I don't know why I keep calling it my dad's when I'm the one in it daily. Anyone who had ever watched a cooking show on the food network knows exactly what my kitchen looks like. It was comical how my mom literally pulled it out of a magazine. An empty top of the line double door fridge, a 10 burner stove that was never used for anything other than midnight ramen, several huge black marble counters and plenty of space for the non-existent appliances and cookware in drawers and cabinets. There was a nice circular table in the dining room right next to the kitchen, again maintained but never used. I sat on the couch with a bottle of jack and took a gulp. I was just so fucking mad over everything that had happened today I honestly just wanted to pass out and wake up in the morning. About an hour of me sitting in the daylight and I began to wonder where Jenna was. I popped out my phone and shot her a quick text. "Where r u? I'm bored." "Sorry hun. Mark wanted to hit the gym early today, I'll see if I can stop by before work, I close from six to eleven tonight." Fucking Houston ruining my life again. I took a larger drink from the bottle to suppress my anger. What a fucking piece of shit. He just had to make me miserable at any chance he got. "Don't bother you need to do your homework." I managed to use text to speech to send that lie out. I honestly wanted her to come so I had a shoulder to cry on. I hated myself, my life, the person I was. I could have all the friends in the world and be happy having the time of my life. Instead I'm a fucking venomous snake shooting poison at anyone who comes close. I got up from the couch, still clutching the bottle of jack in my hand and wandered downstairs to my floor. I needed to lay down in my bed. Hopefully some rest would make me feel a little bit better. A bunch of pillars holding up the house separated the two sides of the floor. One side was my bed and all my video games, my top of the line computer all hooked up on my 50" flat screen TV. The other was an empty space currently occupied by a cot that Jenna crashed on when she stayed over. To right of the cot was my walk-in closet and the left was my bathroom and the laundry room. I didn't have any decorations set up because I didn't give a shit what my room looked like because only my parents, the housekeeper and Jenna were ever down there. That was about to change though as I really needed someone to talk to after my best friend decided to ditch me for her piece of shit boyfriend. I layed in my bed for another half hour and drank a bit more to numb my mind. I just didn't wanna think anymore. I just wanted to not wake up in the morning knowing nobody would give a shit. "It was bound to happen eventually." "He would have died of a liver disease anyways." "It's not like anyone actually cares." I had these suicidal thoughts constantly in my drunken state, it wasn't as bad as it sounds because of how numbed I was. I sat up and lit a cigarette. My parents bitched about smoking in the house on occasion but the housekeeper got wise and always brought some air freshener every few days to keep smell down. She loved how easy her job was and how much she was paid so she took little steps to make sure she wouldn't lose it. While I took a drag I looked at my phone, another text from Jenna. "Thanks for thinking of me. I think your right I need to do my homework so I can spend more time with you during the week." I thought that was a lie, she just wanted more time to get fucked by that asshole. "I promise I'll be there after work tommorow and stay over. Just hold out for a day ok?" Hold out for a day? She had no idea how fucking difficult it was for me to hold out for a few hours let alone a day. I decided laying down wasn't helping anymore so I stumbled over to my bathroom so I could look in the mirror. I honestly looked diseased in my current state, I clearly wasn't taking care of myself. Scrawny, could barely keep my eyes open, hunched over and pale as a ghost. I threw my shirt and pants into the hamper and stumbled back into my bed looking for my phone. I hopped under the covers in my black boxer briefs and stumbled through my contacts. "Hey." "Whats up Jason? You ok? Im really sorry about today." "Shut up and get over here, front doors open and im downstairs. Come get what you want." "What do you mean what I want?" "Just come here and you'll see." I managed to type before putting my phone down and passing out. "Jason I'm here." Jon woke me up about fifty minutes later. "Where are you? I bought dinner." He would find the stairs to my floor eventually, I turned over and smiled a bit when he finally walked downstairs with the takeout he clearly got from his parents. He looked good in his varsity jacket and black slacks, he must have just got off work. "It fucking reeks of smoke in here man holy shit." He walked over to me. "Are you ok?" "Just get under the covers with me. Take off your shirt too." "How drunk are you right now Jason?" "Why the fuck does it matter? Just get in bed with me I know it's what you want." Jon shook his head. "I'm sorry I kissed you today Jason...you clearly weren't ready and you definitely aren't ready now." He sat down on my bed next to me, caressing my messed up hair. "I caused this mess and I'm gonna stay here till I fix it. Where are your parents?" "In fucking Texas for two weeks." I swatted his hand away and turned over. "Whatever you don't wanna fuck just get out." "Do they do this often to you?" "Who are you my fucking shrink? I told you to get the fuck out." "Jason I just wanna fix the mess I made." "You think you're my only problem right now Jon? You think I'm laying here drunk like a dumb slut because of some stupid fucking kiss? You're so fucking conceited it's disgusting." I turned over again feeling around for the bottle of jack I brought down. "Just get the fuck out of my house and leave me alone if you don't wanna fuck." "I'm not leaving you in this state you'll probably kill yourself if you keep drinking like this and don't eat anything." He snatched the bottle off the ground before I could find it. "Geez was this thing full today? There's like a shot left." "Lemme finish it you piece of shit." "Absolutely not, that's suicidal." "Maybe I wanna die fuckwad now give me the fucking bottle." I got up and tried to swipe it from him. Jon stood back and took a good look at me. "I had no idea Jason. I didn't know you were this bad off." I chuckled. "Whats wrong? Not the fucking girl you thought I was? Not some dumb lil bitch with zero problems? This is fucking me Jon. This is my fucking life. Now whats gonna happen if you're gonna fucking run away like everyone else does. Like they all do, when they know I'm a fucking mess and they know it's not their fucking problem. Just like Jenna, she's gonna stop talking to me and stay with her stupid fucking asshole of a boyfriend. Just like my fucking parents. They realized they fucked up raising their son and just leave him to cope alone. Nobody wants to deal with a piece of shit like me. I don't wanna deal with me. Now give me the rest of that bottle so I can pass out and stop hating myself for a couple hours." I was on the verge of tears. "GIVE ME THE FUCKING BOTTLE YOU PIECE OF SHIT!" He put down the bottle and moved closer. "DON'T FUCKING COME ANY CLOSER JUST GIVE ME THE FUCKING BOTTLE AND GET OUT!" He didn't flinch and crouched down in front of me. "DO YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND ENGLISH YOU FUCKING STUPID ASS CHINK? GET THE FUCK OUT." I shouted in his face through my tears. He grabbed me and didn't let go. "Shh...let it out..." I started bawling on his shoulder. "It's ok Jason I'm not leaving. Just let it out." "Why do they not help me? Why does everyone run away? I'm fucking worthless. I'm a trainwreck. I'm nothing but a piece of shit." I kept crying, soaking his jacket all the way down his back. "It's ok Jason I'm here..." "Why? Why does nobody care?" "I care I promise..." He held his place for what seemed like an eternity. He didn't want anything out of me except to vent all my pent up rage and fear. After about an hour I pulled off and made me lay down. "You need to eat. I have some soup here, if I feed it to you do you promise not to spit in my face?" I nodded incredibly light headed. I wasn't in the position to fight him. "Ok now get up so you can get some energy to take a shower and go to bed." He fumbled through the bag of takeout he brought for the container of soup. He lifted me up with one arm. "It won't burn you just drink what you can." I nodded and opened my mouth when he put the container up to my face. I managed to finish it within 30 seconds. I was clearly incredibly famished and needed the food. "Alright now go take a shower. I won't look at you naked but I will be around in case something goes wrong. Is that your closet over there?" I nodded again, I was too exhausted to talk after everything that happened. "Ok I'm gonna get you clothes to sleep in. Now take a quick shower so you can get some rest. It's already eleven-thirty and we have school tomorrow." He helped me up. "I'm gonna go into your closet while you undress in the bathroom. Just a 5 minute shower will do now hurry up." He walked away as he said. I stumbled into the bathroom a turned on the shower. The nice thing about my shower is I had hot water available to me no matter what. I just stood there for a couple minutes, dozing off until Jon knocked on the door. "It's been 10 minutes Jason come on you're probably shriveling up." I rinsed some soap and shampoo for 5 minutes and hopped out. "Open the door so I can give you your towel and clothes." He handed me my silk pajama bottoms and an oversized teeshirt I won in some online contest. I walked out to find Jon had borrowed my sweats and took off his shirt leaving him with his dark blue undershirt. "Sorry I'm not leaving you tonight so I borrowed some pants." I nodded. "Alright im gonna eat and go to bed on this cot over here. If you need me i'm right here. Get some rest so you don't look like a hungover mess tommorow." He turned around and opened the bag to eat his late dinner. I walked over to him. "Jon..." "Whats wrong?" "Can...you...sleep in my bed tonight?" "I don't think that's right." He shoveled some rice into his mouth. "You're too weak right now to know what you want." "Please..." "Will you go to sleep immediately if I do?" He look more annoyed than concerned at this point. "Yes." "Ok give me 5 minutes to eat then I'll join you." I stumbled over to my bed and crashed on it. I was clearly still intoxicated and would pay for it in the morning. After a couple minutes of staring into blank space I felt Jon get under my covers and hold me. He felt so warm and strong, his arms holding me tight. I quickly dozed off in his embrace. I woke up alone a few hours later hearing the shower running full blast. I looked at my phone, "6:30" I had an hour to get ready. I was contemplating getting up at all today. Last night was exhausting and I honestly didn't remember all the details. I just wanted to lay in bed all day and feel sorry for myself some more. "Come on get up." Jon stood there in a towel. I'd be lying if said he didn't look like a model. He had been working out his chest and abs recently because there was more definition since the last time I saw them. His arms looked slightly bigger too. "I'm gonna borrow more clothes then come back tonight with my own things I hope you don't mind. "What?" "I'm not leaving you alone for a while you're way too unstable to do anything of the sort." "You're fucking kidding right? What gives you the right?" Clearly I was no longer vulnerable and weak and the hangover was taking over. "Holy crap Jason I'm just fucking worried about you. Once again i'm not looking to fuck you, I'm genuinely concerned about your wellbeing." He walked into my closet to find something to wear. "Jenna's staying tonight you don't need to worry about me." "Yeah we'll see about that. I heard Mark is having a party tonight, let's see where her loyalties lie. I'm borrowing another pair of sweats, your Trtional shirt and Zedd hoodie. That ok?" "What are you talking about?" "Mark is having people over his place while his parents are out of town tonight. I got the mass text last night when I was taking care of you. Fuck this shirts tight, whatever." He threw my hoodie on as he came out of my closet. "You took a shower last night just go throw some clothes on so we can go get breakfast before school." Barriers Ch. 02 Jenna wouldn't do that to me. She wouldn't change plans after realizing what I went through yesterday. She doesn't even know about my parents yet. "Jason, come on don't freak out like this to start the day." He came over and hugged me. My shirt was easily two sizes too small and it was showing as it gripped his arms and chest. "I hope I'm wrong and she's here and I can go home tonight but I can't take that chance." "Why the fuck do you care so much?" "Because I can." He loosened his grip on me and kissed me on the forehead. "Because you're worth caring about." "Stop Jon." I stepped back "We're not together. Stop touching me like we are." "Sorry, I'll respect your boundaries again." He turned to walk up the stairs. "Your kitchen is bare, lets go get breakfast. I'll wait upstairs for you just hurry up." I groaned as I went to my sink to not look like a mess. Combed my hair in front of my face, rinsed with some cleanser and applied some eye drops to cover up my messed up bloodshot eyes. After that I walked into my closet and looked for my generic clothes. I decided on being a smurf today with a navy hoodie, light blue shirt and my favorite pair of jeans. They hug my ass well and felt like I was wearing nothing. After grabbing a pack of cigarettes I walked upstairs to see Jon waiting at the door looking at a photo of me when I was younger. "God you were cute back then too." He looked up and gave me his trademark smirk before opening the door for me. "Come on we have like half an hour." I reluctantly followed him out the door and into his car. "Let's just grab a quick bite at Panera. My treat." He drove onto Plainviell Rd and within 3 minutes we were waiting in the drive-thru line. "Thanks..." I mumbled as we sat there waiting listening to Jon's ipod . "Huh? Sorry did you say something?" "Thanks for taking care of me last night...it's not usually that bad it just..." "Stop talking." Jon looked out the window. "I pushed you way too hard yesterday, I know you're really scared of interacting with other people after what happened when we were younger. I know it was out of line to kiss you and I'm sorry. " Jon pulled up to the menu, we ordered some bagels and smoothies and we were on our way to school. He parked in the back lot, it wasn't that occupied yet and we were able to sit his hood and enjoy breakfast. "So you just never eat?" "I don't like eating alone it makes me think about myself." "That's not healthy in any way." "How about you stop giving me the third fucking degree?" Jon was still getting used to how incredibly caustic I was when I was given advice. He just shook his head and apologized again. "The fuck is going on here?" Said a rather familiar voice. Jenna stepped out of the passenger side of a car a couple spaces away. "Why the fuck are you hanging out with him?" "He can fucking hang out with who he wants to hang out with bitch." "Yeah just like you can fuck Vanessa the day he leaves for England right?" "Why the fuck are you so obsessed with my sex life?" "Because you're gonna fucking use Jason like every other fucking girl at this school that isn't me." "And you know this how?" "Because you're a fucking piece of shit Jon." "Holy crap you haven't spent more than three hours with me over the past eight months how the fuck can you even judge me off that?" "I call a user when I see a user Jon. Come on Jason lets go I need a smoke to forget about this piece of shit." "If anyone's a piece of fucking shit it's you. Who the fuck dates the kid that bullied their best friend?" "That's none of your fucking business, and Jason said it was ok." "Really Jason? Do you honestly find this ok?" Jon pointed to Houston finally getting out of his car and walking over the the shouting match that was quickly attracting attention. "I...Jenna..." My head was spinning again. I didn't know what to say or do. Jenna and Jon needed to stop fighting. Houston needed to get away from me. Jenna was with Houston all night. She was probably going to ditch me to go to his party. I was at a loss of words and just wanted to fucking drink into a stupor again. I felt nauseous. I didn't know what to do. "Look at what you fucking did Jon. Now he's fucking sick. Way to fucking go." Jenna ran over to me but Jon stopped her. "You have your boyfriend to worry about since he was more clearly important to see last night when your so called "best friend" had a fucking episode." Jon was ready to punch her in the face. "So go spend time with him. You made your choice. I'll be taking care of him from here on out." "You can't fucking tell me what to do you piece of shit. Jason I'll be over tonight after school. I'll get someone to cover me for I swear." "Yeah fucking right." "NOBODY IS FUCKING TALKING TO YOU." "Just get out of here already. I'm sure you have Mark have party plans to make anyways." Houston shrugged and started walking into school. He knew any words he could possibly contribute to the current situation would only make things worse. Jenna came over to my side and hugged me. "I'm sorry I'll explain everything tonight. Please just make sure he's not there." "You can actually just fuck off Jenna i'll leave when you actually show up instead of when you say you will." "HOLY FUCKING CRAP SHUT THE FUCK UP." Jenna looked back at me. "I promise. I would never lie to you." She hugged me and kissed me on the cheek as I crouched down on the side of Jon's car. "I have to go now, text me if you need anything." "You're so fucking transparent it sickens me." "The feelings mutual dumbass." And with that Jenna ran to catch up with Houston. Jon threw the remnants of breakfast in the brown paper bag to throw out then came around and crouched down to be at eye level. "I'm sorry, I lost my temper there. She just hates me for no reason and I don't know what to do." "Whatever." I looked away from him. "You both just get angry instead of understanding the other person's side. It's dumb." Jon got up and looked down at me and scratched the back of his head. "That's fair I guess. She's been your best friend for two years." He turned around looking at the school clock tower. "You have ten minutes to get to homeroom. Don't be late. I'll text you at noon when we both get out and I'm taking you to lunch. I'm not taking no for an answer." He began walking towards school. I really just wanted to go home and drink myself asleep some more. Within a day everything was spiraling into madness. It's been a while since I had been this stressed. I wasn't a big fan of people fighting over me and I definitely didn't have anyone to talk to now. There really wasn't anything else to do except pick myself up and head to class. Barriers Ch. 03 The bell rang for my last class of the day and like clockwork my phone vibrated. "I'll be waiting out front hurry up." I stood at my locker contemplating blowing Jon off. I really just wanted to go home and shut myself off from the world. I decided against it because Jon would just bang on my door until I gave in to him. I walked out and hopped in his car. "I'm really sorry about this morning. I really just lose my temper when dealing with Jenna. I've never had someone hate me so much for no reason." He scratched the back of his head with his left hand as he drove down Plainvell Rd. "Yeah whatever. Where are we going?" I noticed Jon drove past the commercial area and we were heading towards the park. "You need to get out more, I figure the park is a good place to start." "Fuck you. Pull over so I can walk home." "You're not going home to drink more dipshit." He quickly changed his tone from repentant to pissed off. "Here you go again trying to take me on a fucking date. As soon as you stop this car I'm walking away from you." "I'm not taking you out on a date. It would be nice to see if you're actually a decent human being when you're not drunk off your ass or hung over from drinking like an ass." "We've gone over this Jon. I don't like thinking about myself. I get drunk to forget about my fucking problems." "Or you could be an actual human being and fix your problems instead of drinking them away." "I'm far from an actual human being Jon. Holy fuck you're so fucking arrogant." Jon parked his car by the Nature Trail . "Look." He turned at looked me in the eyes. Something about the way he looked in the sun made him look amazing. My white shirt was glowing and accentuating his biceps. I could see my reflection is his eye. It stopped me from opening the door. "You have a fucking problem. You're always miserable. You have no friends and it's your fucking senior year. It's time to man up and solve your problems instead of shutting off everyone like you always do." "Holy crap." I snapped out of my trance and stepped out of the car. "You're only doing this so you can fuck me." I walked off back towards the mall. "You can't fucking tell me what to do. I'm not your fucking boyfriend." "You can't keep running from your problems Jason." He got out of his car as he shouted at me. He snatched my arm and turned me around. He had a vice grip on me with zero intention of letting go. "I'm not fucking letting go and I'm definitely not going to let you go home." "Let go, that fucking hurts." "Nope. Not until you listen to me." He pulled me in close and hugged me tight. "You need someone in your life that won't put up with your stupid fucking attitude. You're not a waste of life like you think you are. The guy that I'm in love with isn't a waste of my time." He squeezed me again. I couldn't help but calm down. Something about being hugged in such a loving way, knowing that someone in the universe cared enough to stick around through my problems made drop my guard. I thought back the last night where Jon held me in my bed. Something about this warmth felt amazing. "If I let go are you gonna walk away?" "Don't let go..." I mumbled. "Heh. Ok Jason. God you're so cute I wish I could kiss you again." I entertained the thought for about a minute as he held me but decided against it. If I rushed myself into whatever we were getting into it would fail just like everything else in my life. I wasn't even sure if I actually even liked Jon. This could easily just be me latching onto someone who's giving me attention. My silence told him everything he needed to know. "I'm in no rush, I can wait for you to move forward, but just give me a chance is all I ask. Give me a chance to make you feel better. Trust me." He's been so patient over the past 6 months. He kept waiting for me to move forward into whatever we were. Maybe I should be giving this guy a chance. "Come on, it's been a half hour and I'm starving. Let's go get something to eat." "But the park..." "Can wait for another day where you're ready. Right now you just need to get back to being healthy again and that starts with you eating regularly." He let go and moved back to his car. I followed into the passenger seat. "Did you mean it?" "Mean what?" "You love me..." "Ah crap my words get me in trouble again. I'll get back to you on that." Jon parked at the mall quickly and hopped right out of the car. He clearly didn't want to walk about it. "I'm in the mood for a burger, let's hit up the Meat Hog." "Jon you can say you didn't mean it I won't hold it against you." "It's just I didn't want you to run away because I felt like if you did I would never hear the end of it at school because Jenna is such a bitch and..." "So you can just throw out the word like that?" "No." He stopped clearly mad at himself for digging his hole. "I like you a lot. Like... a lot. It's pretty close to love I think. That doesn't change that I shouldn't have said it and now we're in this situation. I'm an idiot I know." He turned around and smirked. "It's hard walking on egg shells, and even though I I don't wanna I'm gonna screw up a lot. It's just life. Now come on I really am starving." About fifteen minutes and some idle chit chat later, the waiter brought over our food. I had a buffalo wing appetizer while Jon ordered what seemed like a mountain of food. "I've been eating so much since I've been going to the gym more often nowadays. Feel free to have anything you want." "Oh im fine..." "Everything ok?" "Just seems kinda...dateish don't you think?" "Nah this isn't a date, I wouldn't be eating this if it was." Jon forced some unholy burger concoction in his mouth. "Just think of it as bros grabbing lunch." He said with a full mouth, After seeing him eat I saw his point. He must have been extremely hungry because he was really digging in. It was kinda revolting. I shrugged and began eating as well. After about an hour and several empty plates later Jon picked up the check despite my protests and we were off to my place. "It's your birthday tomorrow isn't it?" "How did you know?" "I think when you know someone for six months you should know their birthday. That or I like you a lot so I should know your birthday. Whoops missed the turn." Jon was getting nervous. "Well it is tomorrow and before you ask I have no plans." "Perfect, don't plan anything then I have an idea." He scratched the back of his head. "Are you gonna tell me this plan or is it a surprise?" "If you want me to tell you I will but I would rather surprise you, I think you'll love it." We pulled up in front of my house. Jenna was already waiting on my doorstep. The look of disgust on her face as she finished her cigarette might of bent steel. I figured I should end our conversation quick. "Uh so yeah. Thanks for everything and I'll see you tommorow." I opened the door and got out. "Jason your things." Jon took my hoodie and shirt off and handed them to me. I got another good look at him. His Calvin Klein boxer briefs were sticking out of my sweatpants too. Fuck he looked so good. If I had any mental fortitude I would fuck him right then and there. "Oh uh...thanks." "No problem. Try and cut back on the drinking tonight. Alright see ya." He drove off slow and winked at Jenna knowing it would piss her off. "Fucking pig." She tossed her cigarette onto my lawn as I walked up to meet her. "You just won't listen to me will you? He's gonna take your virginity then peace out like he did with every cheerleader he's ever been with." "I think six months is a lot of time to waste on me if he just wants to fuck." I opened my door and made sure the housekeeper was gone. "You're so naive Jason." She walked over and opened my liquor cabinet and took out the bottle of grey goose. "Some pretty boy pays attention to you and tells you he likes you and you're fucking putty in his hands." She poured two shots and downed one immediately. "Come on today sucked and Marky wouldn't go to the gym with me. I wanna get buzzed." She handed me the other shot glass. I shrugged and downed it in one gulp. "You know what we should do?" She took the glasses and the bottle and walked towards the basement. "What?" "Watch a movie tonight!" "Ok I'll fire up Netflix and..." "No let's go out! We never go out!" "But we're already drinking..." "Oh now that Jonathan Han is in the picture you don't wanna drive a little buzzed?" I hated this tension between the two of them. It really made hanging out with either of them incredibly awkward and hostile. "No, theres a shit ton things to watch on Netflix and I've been out all day. I'd also rather not have people see me in public now that everyone and their mother knows Jon is pursuing me." I grabbed the bottle out of her hands and took a gulp out of it. "Ugh fine, but we're going out tommorow for your birthday. I know your parents gave you a shit ton of money since they're nowhere to be seen." "You know my house way too well." "Of course!" She came over and hugged me. "Now what did you wanna watch? I'm in the mood for something animated." "We haven't see frozen yet right?" "You're so fucking smart Jason holy shit." "You're already drunk." "Shut up." I laughed as I pushed her off me and turned on my computer. My Facebook was open from like 2 days ago when I last touched it and I couldn't help but notice the dozens of friend requests I received. I guess everyone wants to know you when your schools point guard wants to date you. I shrugged it off and put on Frozen. As a general rule whenever we watch a movie, we make up a drinking game. Every time a character sang we drank. Everything a pet was introduced or an inanimate object was brought to life we drank. Every time a fairy tale cliché appeared we drank. As anyone who's seen the movie could imagine we got trashed pretty damn quickly. Two hours later the movie ended and we laid there unsure what to do next. "I'm hungry..." Jenna moaned completely gone. "Yeah me too, what time is it?" I looked at my TV to see it was about 6:15. "Jasonnn lets go outttt." "We're far too drunk to drive anywhere." I picked up the bottle we brought down and finished it. "Let's just call in a pizza." "I don't want pizza I want taco bell." This was a regular conversation, eventually I would give in and drive but tonight Jenna had other plans. "I have an idea!" She sat up really quickly and held her head. "I can get Marky to bring us taco bell! Or even better he can drive us there and back!" "Bitch he's not coming anywhere near my house nor am I getting in his car. God knows he would posion my taco and put pictures of me throwing up on Facebook." I started walking upstairs for more liquor. "What do you want? Rum or Gin?" "I want Marky to take us to taco belllll, but if you're gonna be a dick about this I guess Rum." She laid back down texting who I could only assume was Houston. I came back downstairs with some Captain Morgan and knew Jenna was up to no good when she had her pouty face on. "Don't be mad." "Good luck. He's on his way isn't he?" "He really cares about me Jason, and he's grown up too. He would never do anything to harm you and has constant guilt about what he did whenever he sees me." "Im sure." I poured both of us another shot. "Look hun, he said he would drive us there and back. He won't say a word and if he makes you mad I will never impose this on you ever again." She came over and hugged me. Jenna never asked a lot out of me but I could tell she was really happy about her relationship and just wanted things to work for her. "I'll be nicer to Johnny if you say yessss." "You swear he won't say a word?" "Not even to order food he already texted me his order!" She shoved her phone in my face. Girl was the whitest of white girl wasted. "I can't convince you otherwise can i?" "Oh Jason I love you so much thank you!" She clinged onto me and took her shot. "To being the best friend ever!" A half hour later Jenna's phone vibrated signaling that Houston was here. We stumbled out of the house arm in arm and I locked my door. She got in the front seat and I laid down in the back. "BABYYYYY IM SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE!" She screamed. "JENNA YOU'RE SCREAMING HUN!" I yelled just as loud not because I was drunk but because I was about to make Houston regret his decision "I AM NOT!" "YOU ARE TOO!" "WHATEVER TO TACO SMELL!" Houston didn't say a word like he said and began driving. I couldn't see much because I was laying down but I could tell Jenna was all over her boyfriend whispering something. It felt like an eternity before we got there. Half because I was gone, half because I had to listen to murmurs and giggling. "WE'RE HEREEEE!" Jenna looked back at me laying down. "GET UP BITCH IM SO FUCKING HUNGRY." I got up and walked ahead of the adoring couple. They would order their own food and I would get my own I figured. "Hello and welcome to Taco Bell Jon's boyfriend." Leena Patel, one of the many school gossips was at the cash register. "We're not together." I slurred. "Just give me what I always get." "If you say so. 3 tacos, a drink, and an order of Potatoes. That's $5" We were definitely here way too much because she knew that by heart. I swiped my card and moved aside to pour myself a soda. "I want...this is too hard I can barely see!" Jenna giggled. "Baby order for us pleaseeeeeeee." Houston gave her a glare because all 3 of us knew he wasn't supposed to say anything. "Oh it's fine Jason understands how gone I am." She smiled at me. Houston and I looked at each other. I shrugged and went to get a straw, signaling that it was fine if he talked. He sighed in relief and ordered what I thought would just be food for him and her. What seemed like an eternity of staring at the celling we picked up our food. "Enjoy! Tell Jon he needs to sign up for Mr. Wilson next month!!" Leena was determined to get a confirmation out of me. "We're not dating, I wouldn't be drunk on a Thursday if he had anything to say about it." I laughed as I walked to the exit. "BABE THAT'S A LOT OF FOOD IS THAT FOR JUST US?" "No it's for everyone else. Remember? You said you would be there?" I knew it. Jenna was prioritizing her new fuckstick over me. She was now officially lying to me. She had no intention of staying over she probably would of just snuck out when I passed out if I refused to go to Taco Bell. Everyone was quiet in the as we approached my place. "Well have fun you two. Houston it was a pleasure as always." I said bitterly as I got out of the car. "Sweetie wait." Jenna hopped out of the car mouthing for Houston to wait. "Don't fucking say anything." "Honey he wants to come to the party to show you he's sorry!" "Don't give me that bullshit Jenna we both know you're lying. You had no intention of staying tonight. You were gonna sneak out later and go see him." "Jason stop I'm serious there are like 30 people at his place waiting on us!" "What on earth are you even thinking right now? You think I would even want to go?" I dropped my bag to the ground and was ready to cry. "You're lying to me now. After 2 years and knowing how hard it is for me to trust anyone you do this to me." "Oh please you're going off and fuckin Jon fucking Han and you're gonna call me the liar???" "I haven't done a fucking thing with him Jenna. Unlike you I keep my fucking promises." "What the fuck does it matter? If you were my friend you wouldn't keep talking to him. Marks been trying to date me for a year. I finally said yes because I was so sick of seeing Jon with you and seeing how happy you were. You're doing the exact same fucking thing to me bitch." "Oh so that's what this is about? That's how you get back at me? Fine Jenna go enjoy your fucking party. I don't give a shit anymore." I picked up my bag and wiped the tears off my face with my sleeve. "Have a fucking great time bitch I hope he doesn't drug you and humiliate you." "FINE WHATEVER!" She threw her hands up in the air and stumbled back to the car. "Ok babe whatever let's just go." I walked up to my house and fumbled with my keys. I kept struggling to find my house key between my impaired vision and the tears coming out of my eyes. After 3 minutes I felt someone grab the keys and open my door. Houston picked up my bag and guided me downstairs. "What the fuck are you doing you piece of shit get the fuck out of my house." "Jason stop doing this." "GET OUT." I walked straight to the bottle of rum and took a large gulp and put it down. "I WILL NEVER FUCKING FORGIVE YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME." Houston walked over and brought me in for a long hug. I attempted to struggle for a good minute while he embraced me. I felt tears on my shoulder. "I'M FUCKING SORRY OK? I WAS FUCKING YOUNG. I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I NEEDED TO PUSH YOU AWAY BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MY FEELINGS. I DIDN'T WANT IT TO TURN OUT LIKE THIS. I'M A FUCKING COWARD OK?" He could barely talk because of how badly he was sobbing. "IT JUST...ITS JUST...IM FUCKING STUPID OK?!??! YOU WERE MY BEST FRIEND AND I WAS IN LOVE WITH YOU. I STILL AM! PLEASE JUST FUCKING FORGIVE ME BEFORE I LOSE YOU TO THAT FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!" I was finally able to push him off me. I couldn't believe it. He was in love with me this entire time. Throughout our entire history of school. Through all the awful pranks and the humiliation he was trying to fight off his feelings for me. "Get out." "Jason please I can't fucking stand that Jon is going to win you. I've been trying to years to work up the courage to deal with my feelings for you and now Jon Fucking Han is going to be your fucking boyfriend. It's just...Please just forgive me so we can try and be happy again." He walked up and picked up picked up my face with both his hands. For the first time in a nearly a decade I saw Mark Houston vulnerable and scared. "Please...just give me a chance to make things right. I can't lose you to him." "Get out Houston. I meant everything I said. I will never forgive you. You and Jenna must have tried to come up with this plan for a couple months at the very least." I looked away and pushed his hands down. "It didn't work. You lost. I'm gonna try and be happy with Jon. I'm gonna try and work out all the years of abuse and misery that's turned me into a cold alcoholic. All this work that you did." I walked away. "Jason...just know that I'm sorry and if you ever want to give me a chance..." "Get the fuck out." Houston knew he had lost. He began walking upstairs. "If Jon hurts you in any way I'm going to kill him." "You should probably kill yourself first. Considering the circumstance no?" Houston looked at me one more time before he closed the door. His eyes told me everything. I sat down at my computer at put on some music and lit a cigarette. The drama just wouldn't stop. After putting out my cigarette and eating my food I decided I would text Jon. "Hey." "Whats up?" "Houston confessed his love for me in an effort to get me to stop seeing you." "Are you serious? Mark Houston is gay?" "Apparently it's why he bullied me for 5 years." "What a fucking idiot. Are you ok? I would run over there but I have to close the restaurant tonight." "I'm fine. I just can't wait to see what you have planned for tommorow." "So you're excited? :)" "Thrilled in fact. :)" "Well get some sleep and I'll be there nice and early. Maybe we shouldn't go to school tommorow. It's been one hell of a week for you." "Sounds good." "Oh and happy birthday Jason Andrews. Let's make it your best one ever." I looked at the clock. It was somehow midnight. I had no idea where the time had gone. I got up and decided to shower before bed. After putting on some fresh sleeping clothes I walked over to my bed. I noticed next to my bed was the clothes Jon had worn today. I picked up the hoodie and put it on. It still smelled like him. Between the smell and the warmth I was able to imagine him holding me as I drifted off to sleep. Barriers Ch. 04 Authors Notes: Long story short, 2 chapters were written then my hard drive crashed and I abandoned this project for a while. I came back to it last week and was incredibly unhappy with chapter 4 so I decided to rewrite it from scratch. I'll be refining details in Chapters 1-3 as well but I was incredibly dissatisfied by chapter 4 hence why the rewrite is coming out before I move forward. Chapter 5 won't be for a while as this is just a small creative project I have between work and school. Sorry for the wait on the continuation. Thanks for all the support. * The doorbell rang about ten times before I realized the housekeeper wasn't around and I had to wake up and answer it. I glanced at my phone as I groggily waked up the stairs, about 20 missed calls and even more texts from Jenna. I wasn't about to sort through whatever she had to say nor did I care. I didn't even want to think about what the hell happened last night. I wanted to believe it was all some ridiculous dream brought on by too much gin. I took a deep breath and reached for the door. "Yeah yeah Jon I'm awake. It's my birthday you could have let me sleep in." "I mean you should have woken up about three hours ago for school; I thought this was more than fair." As I expected there was Jon with breakfast. He even managed to pick up some stupid looking balloons for my birthday. He was wearing my sweatpants but this time he had a black shirt and hoodie on, all of it needlessly tight. He motioned me out of the way and started walking into the dining room. "I got you the same thing you got last time we were there. Hurry up before it gets cold, I'm not even sure if anything works in this kitchen. Are you sure they aren't the floor models?" I scratched my head as I followed him. "I'm not doing anything today after last night." "You're kidding right? I have a room booked in Atlantic City and everything." He chuckled. "I mean if I have to go by myself I will but I think you're over reacting. Who cares about Mark?" "Houston isn't the issue. It's Jenna and her stupid story. Look at my phone." As I pull the phone out of my pocket to show Jon, it vibrates again. "Oh my god she won't stop." "Are you really not going to come with me if you're still fighting with her?" He ran behind me to look for silverware in the kitchen, his tone changed slightly to indicate he was concerned. "I don't know. She's the only other person I talk to Jon you have to understand." I pressed my face into my hands again and groaned. "Oh I do understand. I understand she's a bitch and you should be happy on your birthday instead of worrying about someone who lied to you despite your trust issues. " "Can you not be such an asshole for once?" "I just don't understand what's so hard about forgetting her and making her sweat for a weekend." "You are a douche, are you just playing an act just for me so you can win me over?" "Woah. Sorry if I hit a nerve I just don't understand what's so confusing. You let her be sorry and decide if she's worth keeping as a friend." "Even if she's your only friend?" "What the hell am I then?" Despite my growing impatience with this conversation Jon maintained a ridiculously happy attitude about everything making it hard to take him seriously. "Your hangover is messing with your decision making just sit down and eat before you think about this stuff." I opened my mouth to continue to argue but realized the futility and instead took a deep breath and sat down to eat. What bugged me the most about the entire situation is how well Jenna managed to play it. Maybe it was just me letting my guard down but I had no idea this was coming. What was the point of lying to me? "You have two options." Jon broke the silence after finishing up breakfast while picking up the trash and throwing it out. "Talk to her before we leave or let her squirm for the weekend. I'd prefer the second option because we have to go clothes shopping but it's up to you. You mind if I shower? "He started walking towards the front door. "Yeah whatever." I waved him off as I got up from my seat and walked downstairs. Jon was right about eating, I felt much better despite the bottle and a half I went through last night. I decided to go back to sleep instead of letting my mind race around last night. Jon was right; thinking about it wasn't doing anything but driving me insane. "It's time to get moving." I woke up after an hour to Jon hovering over me. "I packed the car already; we gotta go to the mall before we head out to AC." "Stop Jon i'm not going." I rolled over annoyed. "I was way too much on my mind right now." "Yeah, I'm not having this. Come on Jason let's go." "Stop ok, if I don't want to go I'm not going." "Alright you brought this upon yourself." Jon proceeded to rip me off the bed and onto his shoulder. I forgot despite him being an inch shorter than me he was very capable of picking me up and throwing me. The sudden motion made me gag. Before I could process what was going on we were already out the front door and he was putting me down. "Now which key locks the door?" He looked at me rather proud thinking he had more or less won. "Just give me the keys and I'll lock it." "Nice try, I'm not an idiot. Which one is it?" My patience was more or less non-existent and this point as I was seething mad at how confident Jon was. "You're a fucking brute. You think you can just force me to go on some stupid trip with you. It's my fucking birthday. I'm going to choose how I spend it." "Nope, you are spending it with someone who cares about you and isn't going to lie or randomly abandon you! You don't get a say, I spent way too much money to stop now." "Holy fuck you think I give a shit about money?" I reached into my wallet and threw the check my parents gave me at him. "There's your fucking money back asshole now let me go back inside." "Who the fuck gives their kid.....is that three zeroes?" Jon held the check up to the sun to make sure it was real. "Holy shit this is a grand." "Yeah that's the shut up money I get from my parents. Now that that's settled let me go inside and drink in peace." "This is what I'm talking about Jason, you can't keep doing this shit to yourself or you'll have a liver disease before you're twenty-one." "Why the fuck do you care so much?" "Because nobody else clearly does and I wouldn't be able to sleep if I knew my friend was literally drinking himself to death every day." "Yeah well friends make shitty decisions sometimes." I pushed Jon out of the way and walked towards the door only to have him grab my arm. "I'll carry you again if I have to." At this point I realized he was getting more serious about the situation. "I don't want your money. I want to see you happy." "Sometimes you aren't supposed to be happy Jon believe it or not." "Yeah but your birthday is a day you're supposed to be happy." "Like last year...wait no....maybe the year before that.....nah that was pretty damn shitty too...maybe the year before that...." "I get your point. Give me one day to try and make you happy. If you don't have a memorable birthday today then I'll stop pursuing you and leave you alone." It almost seemed like he was begging by the way his eyes glimmered and his grip on my arm relaxed. "Just one day, if you hate what I set up I'll drive you right back." Something in the back of my mind suddenly took over and made me realize how retarded and impossible I was being. Remembering what I had said to Houston the night before I shook my head and chuckled. "What's so funny? Did I mess up again?" His grip tightened in fear of me walking away. "No, just remembering how stupid Houston was last night. Alright let go of me and we'll get going as soon as I go grab something in my safe." "I'm coming with you." "So you can see my combination? No thanks. I'll come back out just let me grab what I need." "Alright your clothes are already packed in the car. I used a small suitcase I found next to your things." Jon finally released his vice grip on my arm. "5 minutes and I come back in. I'll be waiting." I ran downstairs and punched in my safe code. It had been a while since I had opened it. I keep emergency cash in here along with a copy of my parents will, and some family heirlooms. Today however I was looking for my fake id. Yeah, stupid as it sounds I had a pretty good quality fake id made just in case I needed to get in somewhere. I couldn't seem to find it and after five minutes on the dot I heard mister happy come down the stairs. "Are you hiding in that safe? What's going on?" "Still looking for it. Give me a few." I was at the point where I shoved everything to one side to look for the id piece by piece. Jon groaned as he walked back up the stairs. "Come on I need to take you clothes shopping." After another 5 minutes of searching I found it stuck in the middle of the will; perfect sense as I just threw the thing around with no intent of looking at it straight on. One of my biggest fears in this world is the fear of death so anything associated to it freaks me out. After closing up and turning on the security system I locked my house. It was strange leaving the house for something that wasn't a vacation with my parents. This would be the time ever I was traveling without them. I really was such a spoiled and idiotic kid, pissing away my youth because of my repressed anger and animosity towards others. It was time to take steps towards being someone in this world. I hopped into Jon's car and saw he was busy texting someone. "Holy shit finally." Jon drove towards the mall in an abrupt manner. "Sorry I didn't realize how important your time was on my birthday holy crap." Jon groaned and stroked his chin at a stoplight. "Sorry, you scared me back there. I just want to see you happy at least once. You worrying about Jenna isn't fair to you when she screwed up. I've known you for a year Jason. I've been biding my time trying to show you that I'm a great guy that just wants a chance with you and I'll be honest, if I screw up today i just don't know." He was rambling aimlessly but it was cute and endearing like a retarded puppy. "I just want you to know. I like you, like a lot. I have never pursued someone like this ever in my life. I'm not trying to pressure you by telling you this but..." "Off to a great start! What a great decision I made!" I honestly couldn't stand the sappiness of this conversation so I decided to cut it with blatant sarcasm. "I mean it Jason. I just want to make my feelings for you very clear. I really do enjoy being around you. You make me complete and a strange kind of happy that I have never experienced before." "Oh come on plenty of girls have made your dick hard." I said with a gigantic snicker. "You're just going to be difficult this entire time aren't you?" Jon pulled into a parking space and looked me in the eyes. "Just let me know if you have second thoughts about trying to make this work." I gave made a dumb face and popped out of the car. "Where are we going?" "I guess lunch right?" I looked at the clock on my phone. 2:00pm."Alright Chipotle it is." "Anything you want birthday boy." Jon came up behind me and squeezed me really hard stopping us for a bit. Something about Jon's hugs made relatively chilly days like today feel like summer. We stood around the parking lot for a couple minutes before he finally let go. "So I'm winning." Jon walked ahead of me and winked like the cocky bastard he was. "One step forward, two steps back as always." "Oh come on you love me when I'm like this." "You were serious about 10 seconds ago and you're back to being a jackass." "What can I say? That hug reinvigorated me. Come on we still have to get you clothes after lunch." For the little over a year I've known Jon, he always maintained this happy-go-lucky attitude. Now that I think about it, Wednesday night was the first time I had seen him serious. I guess this is why it took me so long to trust him. I have to admit it was becoming hard to ignore every advance and he was definitely growing on me. It helped that I kept thinking back to what I had said to Houston last night. "Are you coming or what?" Jon was waving from the entrance trying to pull me from my thoughts. I brought myself back to earth and ran to catch up. "Sorry, just thinking about Houston." "Do you want me to fight him? I'll beat his ass I swear. It will be your present!" "Yes, I need more bullshit drama. What a great present." "I'm kidding. I would never do something like that unless he hurt you." Jon continued the conversation as we walked into the restaurant. "Are you ok to talk about this? I don't want you to say anything you aren't ready to admit yet." "No it's fine I have to tell you eventually." Jon was insistent on paying when we got to the register. I wasn't in the mood to argue so I found a table and prepped myself for a rather uncomfortable conversation. "So what did he say?" "About what you would expect. I love you, Jon is a liar, I'm sorry. He was even crying at the end of it." I began eating after explaining. "How did you respond?" "Told him to get out." Should I tell Jon about what I said about us? "Is that really it?" "Oh right, he said he would kill you if you hurt me." "You aren't telling me something. There is no way it was that simple. He didn't try to convince you in any way?" "It's fucking Mark Houston. You think I care for any of his bullshit after our past? You think some stupid tears affected me?" "No it's just feels like..." "WOW YOU'RE RIGHT HE WAS CRYING HE CLEARLY MEANT EVERYTHING HE SAID I SHOULD JUST FORGIVE EVERYTHING HE DID AND WE'LL BE HAPPY TOGETHER FOREVER!" I was probably too loud but I really wanted to drive the point home that I had no intention of associating myself with him ever. "Alright I get it. You hate him. I'm just making sure you aren't going to run off and fuck him when we get back." "You still act like we're dating Jon." "I'm pretty confident you'll be mine by the time we get back on Sunday." "I thought it was only for today." "No, I said I would take you back today if you hated it but I know you won't." "You are far too confident of yourself." "Nah, I just think I have gotten to know you over the past year and hopefully that translates into me knowing how to make you happy." I shook my head and went back to my food. Lunch went rather quickly as we continued the conversation. I kept asking the details of our plans for today but Jon insisted on keeping it a secret. Jon led me towards his favorite clothing store after lunch. I had never actually been in the store but Jon insisted that besides my tailored suit, nothing in my wardrobe would be suitable for this weekend. That was fair; I did a majority of my shopping online. Band shirts, Jeans and monochromatic hoodies were all I ever wore. As a guy that only really left his house for concerts it made a lot of sense, but it lacked anything formalwear wise. "There you are!" A tall, slim Asian girl waved at us right in front of the store. "Johnny, I've been waiting for a half hour now what took so long?" "Sorry, we had a couple of issues leaving the house." Jon scratched the back of his head and flinched. "Jason, meet my cousin Suzy." "Hello Jason!" Suzy was about an inch taller than me with long black hair and glasses that accented her deep blue eyes. Her loose white sweater accentuated her perfect tan skin. She finished her outfit with some perfectly fit black jeans, a large black leather handbag and black platforms. Money was good enough to make all of the Hans look good or they were raised to take care of themselves, probably both. She walked over swiftly to get a closer look at me. "You're just as Johnny described you! I already know what I want you to wear. Come come! We don't have much time to waste." "Uh what's going on?" "He didn't tell you I was your personal shopper today did he?" Suzy turned her head and gave Jon a glare. "That's Johnny for you, always likes to leave out the details." "I was afraid he wouldn't come if he knew about this ok?" Jon turned around flustered. Suzy had some kind of effect on Jon. He had gone from confident and cheeky to shy and confused. They began conversing in Chinese as I stood there still very confused. "Whatever. Sorry sweetie allow me to explain, Johnny told me to come here today so we can get you some clothes for this weekend. Johnny doesn't know the first thing about fashion so he asked me to help you out. Don't worry this is literally my job." Suzy was just as chipper and upbeat as Jon usually was. Something about this family really confused me. "Jon has to go get something apparently so it's just you and me! Now come, I have to get back to New York by tonight we don't have much time." She took my hand and quickly dragged me away from Jon and into the store. "Ok Johnny, see you in an hour!" "Hey woah stop for a second. I appreciate the help but what is going on?" She continued to drag me to the back towards the shirts. "Johnny is so stupid sometimes. He wants to take you to dinner tonight at some fancy place and then you're supposed to enjoy AC or something. I don't have the full details because he didn't bother to explain them to me. I'm just here to help you out with some clothes." Suzy finally stopped in front of the button downs. "Now I want to find some solids and some patterns for you. What size shirt do you wear? Medium right? Right." Suzy had a way of drowning you out while she did her thing. It was very reminiscent of Jon. Realizing I wasn't about to stop her from shopping for me I gave up and waited as she moved shirts in front of me seeing what she liked. After being thrown several outfits and lots of projected emotions Suzy picked out 3 for me. "So you're going to wear the blue striped long sleeved with the white slacks for dinner tonight. After that the black shirt with the jeans should be perfect for Saturday and you wear the grey shirt with this hoodie and these dark grey slacks. Any questions?" Suzy handed the cashier the card told her she didn't care about the cost and brought back her focus to me. "You work fast." I look at my phone and realized it had only been about forty minutes so Jon wasn't due back for a bit. "No, no questions....thank you very much." "Not a problem! I have to wait on Johnny too, let's go get coffee!" Suzy took the receipt and walked out of the store at a brisk pace, she was clearly a very face paced individual and I was getting exhausted imagining spending a day with her. I thanked the cashier and ran out to catch up to Suzy. After about 30 seconds of running we walked into a local coffee shop and waited in line. "Ugh, stupid bitch." Suzy took looked up from her phone to glance at the menu. "Sorry hun, one second then I'm all yours." She swiped something on her phone then put it in her purse as she walked up to order. We got our overpriced coffee after about 3 minutes and sat down by the window. "So who are you, how did Johnny find you and how did you manage to be so special to him?" Suzy still in her face paced attitude bombarded me with questions I wasn't really prepared for. "Uh...I'm Jason. We go to the same high school and I don't know." I answered quickly trying to match pace with her. "Calm down. You're so timid for some reason I can't imagine why. Are you nervous about this weekend?" Suzy was fairly oblivious to the affects her personality were having on me it seems as she glanced around the coffee shop and sipped on her latte. "Honestly I've never actually met any of Johnny's girlfriends so you must be really special to him. I didn't even know he liked guys before this week!" "Uhh it's just you're so fast that i..." Barriers Ch. 04 "Oh sorry that's what happens when you live in the city. Fast cars, lights, lifestyle and all that wonderful jazz. I do miss the suburbs though. When I need a break I spend a few days here or on a nice island and god knows I need those. Ah sorry I'm doing it again I'll stop tell me how you and Johnny met and take your time I swear I'm not as intimidating as I seem." "Well, he started talking to me in detention last march asking for a date." "Wait, he has been trying to date you for six months and he didn't give up? Aww Johnny's in love! I have to text Anna about this oh my god this is just too cute." She swiped her phone and started typing rapidly. "Keep going I'm listening." "After that date I kinda kept my distance but this week was different...so here we are going to Atlantic City this weekend..." "Kissing? Sex? Anything juicy?" "Uhh...well I mean..." "Suzy why must you embarrass me every chance you get?" I sighed in relief as I knew Jon was right behind me. "We haven't done anything. That's all you need to know." "Oh shut up you always bragged to our cousins about how you fucked all those girls and now here you are taking this one to AC. I can't help but be curious." "Are you trying to get him to hate me? Jon took out his wallet. "What do I owe you? I'm not going to stand here and give you the chance to embarrass me anymore." "Oh don't worry about it Johnny. This is his birthday present from me!" Suzy stood up with her things and shot Jon a sheepish grin. "Don't pull this bullshit Suzy. How much was it?" "Just make sure you take care of him this weekend. You clearly care a lot about him." Suzy walked past us and waved. "Happy birthday Jason. It was a delight to meet you!" "What did you tell her?" Jon sat down as he pulled on his rubbed his face trying to remove the pink from his embarrassment. "Did she pressure you into saying anything?" "I just told her how we met. Am I really the first person you've introduced your family to?" "Yeah, I'm sorry. I've never seen the need to introduce any of my ex's to Suzy. She would have made them cry. I just needed someone to help me out with clothes because I have no idea and Suzy was in town for once. It was a terrible idea in hindsight." I walked up to throw out my coffee cup by the exit. "Need anything else?" "Just you." "You're hilarious." I flipped him off as we walked out. "How far are we from the hotel anyways?" "It's about a four hour drive. You can crash in the back if you want." "I can sleep in the front; you would be lonely without me. What did you have to go get anyways?" "Oh just needed to see someone and pick up tickets." "Tickets for what?" "That would ruin the surprise. There's a reason we're going all the way out to AC." "You know I can just look at my phone you asshole." I looked down to turn it on only for Jon to snatch it out of my hands and run. "Nope." "Jon stop being an asshole and give me my fucking phone." I stood there and shouted outside of the mall as he ran to his car. I shook my head at the futility of yelling and ran to the car. "There you are. Thought you would run quicker than that. Maybe I need to take you to the gym." "Jon stop being a dick or I'm gonna leave." "You won't leave. I know you appreciate how much I'm putting into trying to make you happy." Jon was leaning against his car fiddling around with my phone trying to figure out my passcode. "Why are you such a prick?" I attempted to snatch it out of his hands but I instead tripped on myself and found myself in Jon's left arm. "Alright, how about this," Jon stood me back up and put my phone in his right pocket and covering it with his hand. "I'll give you back your phone if I can kiss you again." "Why the fuck would I agree to something stupid like..." "Because it can't hurt to try to kiss the guy you want to try and be with." Jon brought his arm around me in to get closer. "What?" "I went to talk to Jenna. She told me what you said to Mark. How you want to try and work this out between us." My face was flush red, he knew I didn't tell him the full story. If I were him I would be mad but he seemed relieved and happy. Maybe I could actually start to believe his feelings are genuine. "Look if you're really uncomfortable with the idea I can just give you your phone back but I'd like a second try. Our first form of intimate contact wasn't exactly the greatest and I regret it a lot but after knowing what you said to Mark I think you're ready for another try at this too." I looked up to see Jon with a slightly altered grin on his face. It was still pretty smug but it was warm and honest instead of joking. "Well..." Today was the first day Jon had been serious about how he really felt about me. I don't know if it was because of how he saw me on Wednesday or if it was what happened with Mark but he really wanted this to work. I would be lying to myself if I said I past the point of contemplation. Jon was the first person other than Jenna that cared about me and my wellbeing. This was my chance to advance our relationship. "I think we could try again." "Alright let me do this right." He switched places with me and had me lean against his car and before I knew it his lips gently brushed against mine, briefly grazing them as to make certain that this is what I wanted. He opened his eyes to observe my reaction; his deep dark jewels told me how much he wanted me to remember this kiss, my first attempt to be intimate with him. I smiled a little and nodded before he came back in to seal the deal. Our first kiss was really forced and awkward, it was mostly him sucking on my lips while I was in a state of panic and confusion. This time however Jon's lips were soft and manageable, he was being gentle and slow. At first I had no idea what to do, but Jon was trying to guide me. He wanted to move at my pace as we worked it out and slowly I understood that he wanted me to open my mouth wider, as if he was asking for permission to open a door. After a bit I opened my mouth slightly to let him in and it was from there he took complete control; Jon coaxed out my tongue and he continued to work my lips to get them to relax completely. I still didn't quite understand what I was supposed to do so I just surrendered to him and allowed him complete control. His tongue spread around mine passionately and before I knew it he was working in sync, every part of mouth was following him as if it was a dance of passion. My eyes opened wide as I came to the realization of what was going on; I looked at Jon with his eyes closed doing his hardest to make sure I felt safe and comfortable while at the same time making every second memorable about our first real kiss. After what felt like a century I had to break off for air. "How was that?" Jon stepped back and flashed his signature smile as he observed my reaction. I was speechless as I caught my breath. All I could do was nod and look down. "Yeah you need to breathe through your nose." He came back close and looked up as he continued to talk. "I hope I didn't disappoint you." "It....was perfect actually..." I finally had enough time to catch my breath and talk again. "Well great." He pulled me from the car and grazed my lips one more time. "I hope you never forget this moment. Now come on we still have to make 9:00 reservation." He let go and walked around to the other side of the car. "We still need to talk about Jenna..." The afterglow was fading and I was slowly coming back to reality. "I'll tell you everything when we're on the road." Jon opened his door and got in. "We just have to get moving or we won't make it there with enough time to get ready." I nodded and jumped in the passenger side. I was worried about what happened between him and Jenna but I knew it would all be resolved in a matter of time. However, for now I just wanted to sit back and enjoy what looked to be like a promising weekend. Maybe Jon wasn't such a bastard after all.