36 comments/ 35448 views/ 83 favorites All Souls' Day By: nomoretears00 Special thanks to my editor WickedWendyDru for all the hard work she's done for me these past several weeks...you're one in a million, Your Wickedness! This story is entered in the Halloween Contest, so please remember to vote! * I had just gone on shift when word came through that major traumas were on the way. The ER braced for the seven car pile-up on the interstate caused by an overturned rig. Reports that were coming in stated that it was bad, very bad; there had been casualties on scene, and I was damn glad I wasn't doing the views. I gathered my team, getting ready for the fight that would soon consume my ER. Quickly I ran through my personal mental checklist, determined to save as many of the patients who came in as I could. Death was a necessary part of life, and I understood this. People were born, lived their life, and then died. What I found insulting was when life was taken from a person before they were through using that life. Being an ER doctor took a special type of person. "Dr. Grey! We're ready...ETA five minutes," my head nurse, Cindy, announced. Taking a deep breath, I counted to ten and then released it. This calmed my nerves, and stopped the jitters in my hands. I needed to bounce up and down on the balls of my feet a few times, really, but it made some of the nurses with less experience uncomfortable. Cindy wouldn't have minded. My nickname was Grey. My actual name was Jamie Greyson, but everyone called me Grey. I'm five feet, ten inches and weigh one hundred fifty pounds. My shoulder length hair is jet black. I have been told in certain light it had blue highlights. My eyes are a light sky blue, and are slightly slanted. I'm thirty-two years old. Our trauma triage nurse came flying around the corner, scrubs already on, clipboards stacked in her arms like metal coffins. She locked eyes with me. "Male, 52, African-American, possible fractured pelvis, possible GI bleed, lower body with general crushing damage." "Ortho and Andersen, Bay 2," I said, without even thinking. She passed the top chart off to my second team who went dashing as the sirens got closer. "Female, 25, Caucasian, arrested en route, collapsed lung, possible chest wall damage, multiple fractures." The ambulances screamed to a stop. "She's mine," I said, and Cindy held out her hand for the silver chart. The bay doors hissed open and like a wave, the damaged came flooding in complete with sound, smell and fury. Please...please, Angel of Death, stay out of my ER, damn it. Many, many hours later I stood over the body of a ten-year-old child. Her poor body had just been too damaged; there was nothing I could have done to change the outcome. That never stopped me from fighting until the end. As I sweated and heaved, my shoulders aching as I continued the useless chest compressions on the child's broken ribcage knowing I couldn't save her, knowing she had slipped beyond that place where I could pull her back, I could've sworn I saw a slight fluttering in the air, just past my streaked, grimy face. I'd barked at Cindy for a wipe and to get the fucking lamp out of my way, thinking one of the idiot interns had brought a UV up to look at something on the girl's head; she had so many injuries. As usual Cindy swiped a cool, damp linen cloth over my forehead quickly and professionally, and never said a word about my profanity at the table. Afterward though, when I'd called time of death and was preparing to go out and tell the father that it was over, Cindy stopped me with a gentle hand. "Grey," she said, her voice low in the room as the other nurses disconnected tubes, lines, and leads from the body. Already I'd detached from my patient and was calling her "the body" but I had to, or I wouldn't be able to face the father, whose wife was still upstairs on James's table with her back torn open as he tried to save her remaining kidney. "Sorry Cindy," I began, ready to apologize, always contrite now that the stress was mostly passed. "No, it's okay," she said. "I just wanted to know...What lamp were you talking about?" I stared at her. "The UV what's-his-dick pulled up to her head while I was still trying to get her back," I said, deliberately not remembering Daniel's name, because the little fucker was lazy, and didn't try hard enough, and besides, he was cute when he fell asleep in the ambulance bay. "Grey...there was no lamp," Cindy said, her large brown eyes holding mine steadily. This had happened before -- me seeing things above the heads of patients, just before they slipped away. I flicked my eyes to the door, to where a father waited, desperate to hear that I'd made a miracle happen tonight, and I was going to destroy his entire world instead. I sighed. "Yeah. Okay. I'm tired, Cin." She nodded, and let go of my arm. I headed for the door. Fuck you, Death. Fuck you for making me do this. I wanted to believe in heaven and hell, so that I could believe that there was something waiting for us after we struggled through this life. Losing patients always affected me, and made me fight harder against Death. I'd no sooner finished my gruesome task that another code blue page sounded in the chute. Damn it all to hell. The Angel of Death had already claimed too many today. He'd have to fight me personally for any more, and I didn't think he had the balls for it. We'd find out, though, I thought, grabbing my stethoscope. I ended up staying two hours past the end of my shift mainly to check on a female, twenty-five, Caucasian. She had been one of the first in. The patient parked in trauma bay five direct from chute and opened by me to drain a punctured chest cavity; collapsed lung reinflated manually; patient went into V-fib at 22:14 and was resuscitated with 300 jules on small paddle and epi by injection at 22:20. Djorak closed, 1500mgs ampicillian administered for infectious controls. Patient was resting comfortably in the Cardiac Wing. I felt like Death had been cheated, a small victory in our private war. I showered at the hospital and changed into my street clothes. Several of my colleagues were meeting at a bar near the hospital, and I had been invited. The day had been like an emotional roller coaster, one long continuous looping and corkscrewing scream-fest rocketing up and down between the heights of life and the valleys of death. "You're coming, right?" Cindy asked. "Please do; you need to unwind." "Sure, why not." I was tired, but was off for the next two days. "It's not like I have anyone waiting for me at home." Everyone at work knew I was gay. I had been out for several years now. My boyfriend and I had broken up six months earlier. According to him my job was my life, and was more important than he was. He didn't understand how stressful and tense working in the ER could be...that I was literally fighting a battle, that some nights I had to choose who lived and who died, and that I had to live with those decisions haunting me long after I made them. He couldn't understand my need to question what more I might have done, my need to go over old case files, or my desire to stay late and make certain my staff went home level-headed, regardless of how scattered I might feel. I resented him for not just being there for me when I got home, for not just offering to hold me, or offering to fuck me into oblivion, which would've been the least he could've done. I wasn't upset when he finally left me. "You're fixated on death, Grey!" My ex shouted in my face. That was the last thing he said as he walked out the door, and out of my life. I parked my car and stared at the bar. A shiver of awareness crawled up my spine and made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. "What the hell?" I trembled as I tapped my fingers on the steering wheel. The darkness of the bar soothed my mind as I strode over to where everyone was gathered. I sighed quietly as I drew closer. The one person I was hoping wouldn't be there was sitting at the table. Dr. Edward James, Chief of Staff, was someone I detested with a passion. A month ago Edward caught me in a supply closet and put his hands all over me. The hospital's medical director, Dr. Marshall Allen, had just had a meeting with Dr. James about the hospital's budget, and Dr. James was furious with the planned cuts. My day had started off rotten when I found that one of my tires were flat, then got to work and found out about the budget cuts, so we were both in piss-poor moods, but that really wasn't an excuse for what happened. I was in the supply closet looking for medium-sized gloves when Edward came in and closed the door. I assumed he wanted to grouse about the cuts, but instead, he grabbed me, spun me around, and slammed me up against the door. His hand twisted in my hair, and his lips savaged mine. I didn't stop to think, just reacted to his hips grinding against me as my body screamed out of control. The initial rush of, oh goddamn, hands finally on my body, a hot mouth on mine, tongues... Yeah, it was good, I'm a guy, but immediately after that my head kicked in. What the fuck am I doing? I am not getting involved with my superior. Hell, I don't even like this asshole! It took some doing to get him off of me, because he wasn't convinced that I really meant no. Ever since then he had gone out of his way to make me miserable. "Hey guys, sorry I'm late," I said, taking a chair far away from Edward. A waitress appeared at the table to take my order. "He'll have crown and coke," Edward said, ballsy enough to order for me with a sneer and a smirk. "Make that hot chocolate, plenty of whipped cream and marshmallows if you've got'em," I said, grabbing the waitress by her sleeve before she could leave the table. "Too good to drink with us, Grey?" Edward asked, his sneer etched deeply into his face. "Too many DUI cases in the ER," I said. "I don't drink and drive." I shifted in my seat so that my back was to him, hoping that he'd get the message. Over the next few hours he generally left me alone, only making a few snide comments directed at or about me. "What a jerk," I said in Cindy's direction. My eyes kept roving over to the main bar. "Ignore him; he's just trying to get under your skin," Cindy said. "Kind of like you're ignoring me." "Huh?" "What is so fascinating over there?" Cindy noticed my quick glances. A guy at the bar drew my eyes like gawkers at a fresh accident site. He looked like a biker with his thick, long blond hair and heavily muscled physique. His black corded sweater was shoved up past his elbows to show off a massive tattoo of a skull bearing a perfectly divine set of wings. Heavy, muscular thighs sheathed in torn, stone-washed jeans made my mouth water disturbingly, and all I could think about was whether or not I'd been a good enough boy to deserve to unwrap both of those presents before Christmas. A curved piece of matte black metal with a spike on the lower end pierced one gorgeously arched, dark blond eyebrow. Several matching rings pierced his ears, and that made me contemplate what other piercings he had that I couldn't see, because I was sure he'd have a few, and they'd be delicious. A thick silver chain circled his neck, the links glittering when the neon from the bar signs caught them, a subtle reminder that guys like him were bad for me, just like alcohol was bad for me. "I think you have an admirer." Cindy grinned at me. "Not my type," I lied. "Too big, too pierced, too tattooed." "Maybe you need to try a new type, sweetie." Cindy swatted my arm. His eyes were as black as night, which was odd with his light blond hair. On the back of his chair was a black leather jacket with chains on it. Every time I glanced his way, he was staring intently at me. I didn't usually date big guys, but my gaze kept zooming back to inked flesh, rippling muscles, and the fantasy of what jewelry I might discover under his clothes. "Uh yeah, he's a little intimidating." I tore my eyes away from him. "Not someone I'd want to meet in a dark alley." I paid my tab and headed out to my car when a shift in the air warned me that I was not alone. Rough hands grabbed my shoulders, pushing me head first into my car. My head bounced off the side panel as I frantically tried to brace myself. Black lights swirled around me as my vision blurred. Nausea rose up viciously as I was bent forward, my wrists pinned behind me, my chest against the hood. Possible concussion, Dr. Grey whispered. Nah, really? I whispered back. "No one tells me no, Slut." I knew the voice whispering in my ear. "Get the fuck off me, Edward!" I struggled against the car. "Have you lost your damn mind?" "One night. That's all I want," Edward said, demand clear in his voice. "I'll make your entire career, I promise." "No! Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I'm promiscuous, you stupid sonuvabitch!" I yelled as loud as I could, hoping to attract some attention. This earned me another rap against the car hood. I tasted blood as my lip split open. I realized he was dog drunk, and I was in serious trouble. Edward outweighed me by fifty pounds at least. This caveman, macho mentality was why I didn't date big guys. "I believe he said no, Friend," a deep, cold voice said. I felt Edward tremble against me. Even I shivered at the veiled menace in those words. Craning my head and squinting my eyes I saw the blond biker from the bar. From my vantagepoint spread across the hood of the car, he looked even bigger than he had sitting at the bar. Heaven help me, the guy was fucking huge! Edward released me and without his body supporting me I suddenly felt weightless. Turning to face the guy he tried to bluff his way out of the situation. He was such an arrogant ass! "Look here, this doesn't concern-" That was as far as he got. The biker put his hand on Edward's chest, just above his heart. I heard his painful gasp as the biker touched him. Edward turned pale, broke out in a sweat, and clutched his left arm. What the hell? The guy barely touched him. "Believe me when I tell you, you do not want to mess with Grey anymore." He spoke softly, his voice a deep rumble. "Now walk away before you have to be carried away." I watched as he leaned over and whispered something else to Edward, something I couldn't hear. Edward turned and left without another word. By this time I was half-on-half-off my car and seriously considering sliding on down to the ground. "What did you say to him?" I asked. "I've never seen him act like that." "I told him that I have friends in low places, and he didn't want to piss me off." "Grey! Grey!" Cindy stepped around the biker. "Oh honey, are you all right?" "Cindy?" I whispered. "Damn, what's going on?" "Az noticed that Dr. James followed you out to the parking lot." Cindy helped me sit down on the asphalt. "He wanted to make sure you were all right, but thought you might feel better if you saw a familiar face." I looked up at the hulking guy. While it was true he scared me shitless, it was equally true that I was fiercely attracted to him at the same time. I was upset, but mainly because I was seeing two of him at the moment. I was sure I had a concussion and as tired as I was this promised to be a long night. Az lowered himself down next to me as I stared blankly up at him. "Are you okay?" he asked. "He rapped your head pretty hard on the hood." "Besides the fact that I'm seeing two of everything, I'm fine," I said, knowing it was a weak joke. "Oh sweetie, you have a concussion, don't you?" Cindy frowned at me. "You can't be alone tonight." "I'll be fine." I was dead tired, my body ached, my head hurt, and I damn well wanted to sleep in my own bed tonight. "I'll set the alarm to go off every couple of hours." "No, that won't do." She pulled out her cell. "You'll stay at my house." "Cindy..." "Not another word, Grey," Cindy replied. I loved this woman almost as much as I loved my own mother. She was a married, middle-aged black lady who treated all the single people in the ER as her chicks; she was a mother hen, and she seemed especially protective of me. She was opinionated, outspoken, and didn't take bull from anyone. She was a force of nature, and like any force she mowed down everything in her path. Smart individuals just got the hell out of her way. "Yes ma'am." I grinned at her. "I would like to check on you tomorrow, if you wouldn't mind," Az said. "Ah, sure. Yeah," I said, surprised. I gave him my cell number, and he helped me to Cindy's car. The next morning Cindy dropped me off at home on her way to work. Her husband dropped my car off later. Az called me twice that day, just to talk. I ended up taking a week of vacation. We talked every day, and I really enjoyed our conversations. Two days after I went back to work, he asked me out. * * * * "What the hell am I doing?" I stared at the incredible mess on my bed. Shirts were strewn across the bed like striped and button-down debris from the five times I'd changed my mind, and three pairs of jeans laid discarded and crumpled on the floor. Shoes littered the room like chunks of shrapnel having landed haphazardly when I tossed them from my closet, unsatisfied with everything I found. My bedroom looked like a bomb had exploded in it. I glared at my reflection in the full-length mirror. Somehow I had managed to put on a pair of plaid dress pants and a stripped polo. "Oh yeah, that's just the look I was going for," I said, rolling my eyes at my reflection. Nervous much? Dr. Grey whispered in my mind. Shut the hell up! I answered. I often carried on mental arguments with myself. Usually it only happened in the ER, when I was debating which course of action was best. Apparently, my present situation qualified as an emergency. My doorbell rang just as I finished getting dressed, for the sixth time. I ended up with a light blue polo, acid-washed jeans, and boots. I left my hair loose. Grabbing my wool coat, I hurried to the door. "Hey!" I answered the door. "You want to come in, or just go?" Az eased me back from the door, letting himself in. He deliberately closed the door, and gradually moved me up against it. "Think we need to take care of something first," he said. Trapped between his warm, heavy body and the door at my back, I watched as he slowly leaned down to kiss me. Nobody was going to interrupt us here, no page was going to go off and pull me away, no code blue was going to demand I go running for the chute and surgery. No, all I had to focus on in this moment was the scent of him, clean man and leather, and the knowledge that if I asked, Az would do whatever I needed to make all the noise in my head just go away. My eyelids fluttered closed as his lips touched mine, coaxing me to open for him. Both of his arms came up to rest against the door on either side of my head, imprisoning me in his embrace. His tongue explored my mouth, teasing the roof as he leaned in closer to me. I moaned quietly as all the blood in my body rushed to my cock. My arms slipped around his waist as he pressed even closer. I rubbed my leg up and down his thigh, panting into his mouth as he broke the kiss. One hand drifted down to cup my ass, squeezing. My head fell back against the door as he nibbled on my throat. "Mmm." I shuddered as he sucked lightly at the base of my throat. My hand drifted down to his groin. His shaft was restrained over to the left, and it was huge, just like the rest of him. I traced a finger down the bulge that I could feel throbbing in his jeans. "Bed or dinner...what do you want, Grey?" he growled, his lips moist against my throat. "My body is screaming bed, but my mind says dinner," I said, gasping. "I don't want to rush this." All Souls' Day "Dinner it is, babe." He moved back from me and adjusted that huge cock. "I want you to feel safe with me, so no pressure." He was dressed like always: ripped, faded jeans hugging his ass, a dark, corded sweater showing off his sexy chest, and sharp black boots. His long blond hair was tied back, and he wore his black leather jacket. He looked dark, dangerous, and totally delicious, though I knew that his look was just that, a look. I'd removed bullets and sewn up the torn and destroyed organs and flesh of real bikers, and after spending a week and a half talking to Az, I knew he wasn't involved in that lifestyle. I couldn't have dated him if he had been, but then, if I'd been the typical asshole, call-me-God physician, he probably wouldn't have asked me out. That one simple kiss turned my brain to mush and made my heart pound. My whole body was screaming with desire...from a kiss. I didn't want to think about being in bed with him; I'd probably combust on the spot. The restaurant we went to was on the outskirts of town. It was a little Italian place that had candles at each table, and soft music playing in the background. Again he surprised me; I figured we'd go to a rowdy sports bar or something. Don't judge a book by its cover, Dr. Grey whispered in my mind. You're right, I answered. Dinner was soft, sweet, and romantic. I found that I really enjoyed his company. During our conversation, he told me more about the motorcycle repair shop that he owned, and about his passion refurbishing and restoring antique motorcycles. At the end of the night he walked me to my door and gently kissed me goodnight. He wouldn't leave until he heard me lock the door. I leaned against it, listening as his boots echoed down the stairs. I gently ran a finger across my tingling lips. Heaven help me, I was falling in love with this guy. * * * * A month past and Halloween approached with falling leaves and smoky air. Cindy was throwing a costume party at her house, and invited nearly the whole damn hospital. I invited Az to go with me. Our relationship was growing, but we still hadn't made love. We fooled around on my couch some, but he always stopped right when things were getting good. I decided that tonight would be the perfect night to make love with him since Halloween was my favorite holiday. "What are you going as?" I asked Az. "I can't make up my mind what I want to be." "Not sure," he replied. "I was kind of thinking about going as the Angel of Death." I couldn't help it; I flinched. As I looked at him reclining on my couch, though, I had to admit that he'd make a perfect angel. "Huh. Maybe I should go as a dead person, then," I joked. "I could be your first victim." "Doesn't work that way, babe. The Angel of Death only escorts souls to Judgment; he doesn't pick and chose who dies." Az frowned at me. "Someone higher up the ladder makes that decision." "I was kidding." I seemed to have hit a nerve, and that fascinated me. We hadn't spent much time on subjects like this, but apparently Az had strong beliefs about what happened after death. I made a mental note to ask him about it when the time seemed right, sometime when we were quiet together. "Why not go as a doctor?" he asked, a reasonable if boring suggestion, until he continued. "That way, you'll be life, and I'll be death." "That's not a bad idea!" I grinned. "I can be the light to your dark." Az looked at me strangely for a moment then smiled widely. There were times since we had been dating that he'd get an odd look in his eyes, like he was seeing something that I couldn't. He never talked about his family, and I didn't push. At times, I sensed loneliness in him, a void that seemed to live inside him. I often wondered what had happened in his life that made him so closed off. Halloween finally arrived, and I was off that night because of the party. The ER would be a madhouse before the night was done, always was. Holidays seemed to bring out the worse in people, and always increased the traffic in an ER. Mischief makers, drunken super heroes who found out they actually can't fly, and excited children in dark costumes combined with moving vehicles at night made for a jammed packed ER. Az arrived to pick me up and I got my first look at his costume. He wore his black boots, as always, but the black leather pants were new. He had a thick heavy chain around his waist that attached to a skull belt buckle. A tight, long-sleeved black T-shirt emphasized his broad, muscular chest. Black, thick and heavy but beautiful and lovely, outlined his expressive eyes and streaked his blond hair. His silver necklace glittered around his throat, but tonight a silver cross dangled from one ear to brush tantalizingly against his shoulder and the spiked curl in his eyebrow had been replaced with a shining silver hoop that matched that rest of his jewelry. I could see the skull tattoo on his arm. His lips and fingernails were both painted black. The real showstopper on this man who was walking eye candy, though, were his wings. Huge, beautiful, black wings that were slightly open rested on his back. The shirt had slits so the base of the wings could be attached to his back. The feathers felt realistic, and must have cost him a fortune. "Oh damn, you look..." Dark, sexy, dangerous, luscious...fucking hot! I had on an old lab coat splattered with fake blood and old scrubs. My stethoscope hung around my neck, and I had on my beat up tennis shoes. My long hair was loose, but messy, like I had run my hands through it several times. "Thank you. I like your costume, also." He grinned at me as I eyed him. "Hey Babe, you ready to go?" He waved his hand in front of my face, making me blush. I grabbed my coat, and we left for Cindy's house. The first thing I noticed when we arrived was the graveyard that she had put up in her front yard. One particular grave caught my attention because it looked like the ground had vomited it up. The top was flung open, and had a partially decayed body trying to wiggle its way out of the casket. Vacant eyes stared at us as it shrieked like a banshee. Other graves had skeletal hands digging frantically up through the dirt, like something horrible was digging its way to freedom. Battery operated red eyes peered at me from the trees and ghoulish jack-o-lanterns sat on hay bales on the other end of the porch. A two-headed dog snarled and snapped at me from the steps. "Look!" I pointed at the two-headed dog, smirking. "If it had two cocks it would never have to leave home...cause you know, it could suck itself off. It's a walking sixty-nine!" "Dare you to tell Cindy that," Az snickered. "I'll make sure I'm standing far away so when she clobbers you with that damn dog I won't get hit." "Know what the red eyes remind me of?" I laughed, ignoring him. "Um...glory hole it much?" "You do know that if I tell Cindy everything you're saying, she'll probably beat you senseless, right?" Az said. "We'll have to discuss what you're willing to do to buy my silence later." Thick cob webs decorated the front porch, and creepy moaning screams drifted across the yard from outdoor speakers. A skeleton set on a bench and it greeted people when they got to the front door. Big hairy spiders that were as black as pitch hopped around, and several ghosts flittered in the breeze. A fog machine blew a sinister smoke all over the yard. Dead leaves were scattered over the porch, and red lights blinked in the bushes. "Man, she really went all out." I couldn't wait to see Cindy. "It's actually kind of scary this year." The theme carried on inside. The inside of Cindy's house looked like the outside. Monsters, silent as death, were hiding in dark corners waiting to yell at you, cob webs covered everything, and the same music played inside, too. Little plates of snack food were placed all over. There were bowls of trail mix that had ghoulish eyes staring back at you, and finger sandwiches that looked like bloody, hacked off human fingers. Cindy greeted us in the kitchen. She was dressed as a witch doctor and serving up glasses of blood red, bubbling liquid that I truly hoped tasted better than it looked as I accepted one. "I didn't think you could outdo yourself, but somehow, you did!" I grinned at her. Cindy picked up a fake, headless chicken and shook it at us. "What the hell are you doing?" I shrieked, laughing. "Keeping bad spirits away, this is All Souls' Day." Cindy eyed us both critically. "Love your costume, Az. It's perfect." "Thank you," Az said, laughing as well. "Happy Halloween, Grey." Cindy kissed me on the cheek as she went to meet new arrivals. "You boys have fun, and stay out of dark corners." There were a house full of people dressed as many different things. Some of the costumes were the usual run-of-the-mill vampires, ghost, and werewolves. One of male nurses at the hospital was dressed a pirate, and threatened to make me walk the plank. A female doctor friend of mine was dressed like a mermaid. Others didn't do all that much, just a simple black mask. We played games like Charades, which Az couldn't play worth a damn! Near the end of the evening, the winner of the costume contest was announced, and Az won. "Way to go!" I exclaimed as he was offered a choice of Halloween gift bags. "Which one do you want for your prize?" "You." He pulled me against his hard body, turning away from the prizes. "You are the only prize I seek." With those words he slid his big hand into my hair and kissed me like I was the most precious thing in the world, like I was something he would treasure always, if I would give him the chance. I lost myself in his kiss as pleasure wrapped around my heart; this is where I belonged. Loud clapping brought me back to the here and now. The party was a blast, and we left around two in the morning. Az managed to win me a stuffed black cat in one of the games, which I caught myself petting on the way home. "Good thing you're not superstitious." He nodded at the black toy I held in my lap. "Nah, not really." I grinned. "I always wanted a black cat as a kid." We parked in the garage, and Az walked me to the door. "Please, come in," I said, my voice low and urgent. "Stay with me tonight." He tilted my chin up, gazing into my eyes. "You sure?" He asked quietly. "I was going to ask if I could stay." "Oh yeah...I want you to make love to me." We went inside and Az removed his big, heavy boots, leaving them by my door as if they were guarding it. I flipped the deadbolt and he swept me off my feet. Holding me tightly in his huge arms, he carried me back to my bedroom. The first kiss, as he leaned down and pressed his lips to mine, was sweet and sultry, but heaven above, I was on fire. Opening my mouth, I wrapped my arms around his neck, brushing those soft feathers on his back. It was such an erotic sensation that it gave me chills. His tongue explored my mouth, then retreated. Encouraged, I teased his lips with my tongue, finally entering his mouth. I moaned softly as my cock pulsed in my scrubs; his taste was intoxicating. His hand threaded through my hair, holding my head still as he chased my tongue back into my mouth. Conquered, I submitted as he deepened the kiss. Lifting his lips from mine, he stared in my eyes. "I want you, want you spread out on the bed, hard and aching for me," he panted, grasping my arms that were around his neck. "Undress for me." I lowered my arms to grab hold of my lab coat and removed it. Pulling my shirt over my head, I let it flutter to the ground. Kicking off my shoes, I untied the scrub bottoms and eased them down my legs. I grasped the waistband of my boxers and slid them slowly off an inch at the time, teasing him with glimpses of my throbbing cock. "Show me," he whispered. I let the boxers slide to the floor. I stood before him, my cock standing straight out. My shaft was slender, but heavily veined, and I had a small pelt of black fur at the base that I kept trimmed. The head was mushroomed shaped, and smooth as silk. Tiny tears of desire leaked from the slit. "Perfect." He breathed deeply. "I want to taste you." He dropped to his knees, the incredibly toned muscles in his heavy thighs flexing and bunching beautifully as his chest heaved. Lowering his head, I watched as his tongue snaked out to lick the tip of my cock. Holding the base of my shaft, he licked the pre-come that dripped from the tiny opening, running his tongue through it. Closing his mouth over the dome, he sucked. "Oh fuck...so good," I said, moaning as he worked me. His other hand tapped my thigh, wanting my legs opened wider. He didn't have to ask twice; I instantly obeyed. His mouth descended down my length as his other hand rolled the sensitive orbs in my sac. Up and down his head bobbed, wetting me, and driving me closer to orgasm. His hand left my sac and I groaned at the loss. "Why did you stop?" I trembled against him. "Patience, Babe," Az whispered as he pulled off my shaft. "I've learned not to rush when something is truly meaningful." Again he took me back in his mouth. Slowly he brushed his hand up my chest, stopping to tease my small, hard nipples, before moving to my lips. I sucked his index finger into my mouth, curling my tongue around the thick digit, wetting it. His hand crept back between my legs, that slick digit easing up to my puckered hole. Tapping it lightly, I felt myself tense and then relax as his wet finger entered me. My balls twitched as I clutched his shoulders. "Close...oh god, it's too good. I'm going to come." I gasped as my hips thrust into his mouth. He hummed around my cock as both hands expertly worked my body. "I'm coming, ah..." I moaned loudly as I exploded, flooding his mouth with all I had to give. My head fell back as he tasted me, and I shook as he continued to suck and draw until I thought the tingling would drive me insane. "So long," he mumbled as he drank the rest of my essence down. "So very long..." I wondered what he meant as my body shook. Breathing deeply, I decided that he had way too many clothes on. I sat up and pulled his shirt free as he stood, unzipping his leather pants. He wore thin, silky, stretchy shorts under the leather and I could see the large, dark, wet circle spreading as his arousal leaked and stained them. Together we managed to get him out of the leathers, and I stared as he peeled that strip of gauzy silk over his hard, muscled hips. His hard, cut cock shot out proudly from its nest of delicious blond curls. Whoever had done his circumcision should receive an award for perfect cock shaping, because just the sight of him made the blood pound in my ears until I couldn't hear anything at all. Dear God, he was huge, and thick, and long, and luscious, and I wanted him inside me so badly I started shaking and trembling. All I knew to do was grab him and kiss him, hoping my hearing would come back when he started pounding into me because that's all I wanted, damn it. I reached for that perfect piece of male anatomy, but he shied away. "I'm too close; when I come, it's going to be inside you," he panted, his stomach muscles bunching. "Just one taste? Please?" I asked, my voice a sexy whisper as I slowly lowered my head. I swallowed him whole, taking him straight to the back of my throat. I felt his pre-come flood my mouth and quickly bobbed the full length of his shaft several times, knowing that he was going to stop me. "Grey, stop! I'm too close," he groaned, grabbing my head. With one last lick, I released him. "Up on the bed, Babe." I crawled back up the bed and lay on my back. "Take that off." I gestured at his shirt. "I can't because of the wings." "Then rip the fucking thing! I want to see you," I said, startled to hear a plaintive whine in my voice. He grasped the collar of the shirt and ripped it down the middle. Watching him do that flipped the final switch in me. I wanted him and I wanted him now. Lifting my knees to my chest, I offered him my body. "In me... need you in me!" I gasped, his finger teasing a hard nipple. My cock jumped on my belly. "Lube?" he asked, his voice a rough growl. "Bedside drawer." I heard the drawer open, and a few seconds later I heard the top of the lube snap open. Warming it in his hands, he spread it on my aching hole, then his shaft. I felt the head of his cock pressing against my entrance. "Yes, oh god..." My head thrashed back and forth on the bed. A small burst of pain, then he slid slowly into me. I relaxed my body as he gently moved in and out of me, using short thrusts. He brushed against my prostate and my whole body shook with pleasure. My shaft filled and twitched, coming back to life under his massive, rippling body. "Ready for more?" "Ah, ah...yes. Go faster." I was building toward another orgasm. Faster he moved in me, rubbing my hot spot each time. I dropped my legs so that I could wrap them around his back, but got feathers and had to content myself with pressing my heels into his perfect ass, urging him back into me like a cowboy would spur a bronco. I was sweating, my hair stuck to my temples and I braced my hands against the headboard as he rode me hard. My eyes drifted closed as he moved above me. A sudden breeze in the room swirled deliciously around us to cool my overheated body. I opened my eyes, wondering where the breeze was coming from, when I saw those beautiful wings moving slowly back and forth, stirring the air. Those beautiful, glossy wings were moving of their own accord! How very interesting; his wings are moving, Dr. Grey whispered in my mind. They shouldn't be doing that. Holy hell, you think I don't know that? I answered. My lust-inebriated brain screamed like a little bitch as Dr. Grey observed the fluttering wings, right down to the intricate vein networks now clearly visible beneath the obviously living gossamer skin covering the delicate hollow bones. They were both the most astoundingly beautiful and single most terrifying thing I'd ever seen in my life. "What...what..." I gasped as his hand wrapped around my cock, jerking me in time to his thrusts. "Come for me, Beloved," he panted. Despite it all, I couldn't disobey. My orgasm swept through me as I watched those wings spread to their full span as he yelled, flooding me deep inside. Fear and pleasure muddled my mind as I watched, his head thrown back, as we climaxed together in powerful, clenching spasms of pleasure. "Get...get off me!" I screeched. I struggled under his body, as common sense returned, bringing a good dose of reality with it. He moved enough that I could wiggle out from under him, rolling to the side of the bed and falling to the floor. Lurching to my feet I stumbled toward the door, my body a confusing mass of sensations. I skidded to a stop, my feet flying out from under me because he stood in the doorway. Shit, how did he get here so damn fast?!? "What the fuck are you!" I yelled as I sat down hard on my wet, well-fucked ass. "Grey please, calm down." Az reached out toward me. "I'm not going to hurt you." "Fuck calming down!" I yelled, crawling backwards away from him like a large, deranged human crab. "What ARE you?" "I'm the Angel of Death." He stood proudly in the door, magnificent in all his naked glory. "My name is Azrael." I froze on the spot. "I don't...I'm not ready to die." My voice broke. "Oh Babe, I'm not here to take your soul to Judgment," Azrael said. "I'm here, with you, because I love you...I've loved you since the beginning of time." "Huh?" I croaked. Very witty, Dr. Grey whispered in my mind. Way to impress the big, bad Angel. Shut up! I snapped. I almost held my head, but stopped myself before I actually did it. All Souls' Day "The first time I saw you, Man was just in its infancy. I watched you, found you interesting. You have always been a healer, all through your many lives," he explained. "But your mind was young, and new. I've never been human, Grey. And I made mistakes with you." "Huh?" I shook my head, hoping something would knock loose in there. "What happened?" "I approached you and showed you my true form. You ran from me in fear. Your tribe tossed you out when you started telling them about me...you starved to death. In your next life you booked passage on a ship bound for the New World but you died at Plymouth Rock. After that, you were burned at the stake in a small New England village because they thought you were possessed by the devil. The lifetime after that-" "Whoa!" I interrupted. "Did I die each and every time?" "Yes, and it was my fault each and every time. At first it was because I didn't understand human emotions and I scared you. I caused you unbelievable terror and for that I am sorrier than I can even express. I grieved every time I had to escort your soul to Judgment." His eyes were filled with sorrow. "As time went on, you began to resent Death... and me. Many times in many different lives I've heard you ask me to stay away. I've tried to make you understand that I don't have a choice. It's never been my decision -- who lived and who died." Azrael raised sad eyes to me. "This is a job I do, just like being a doctor is a job you do." "Oh man." I cringed as I recalled all the times I told Death to stay out of my damn ER. I hadn't understood. The more he talked, the more pieces of the past closed in on me. My head began to pound as memories of past lives swept through me, the love, the fear, and the anguish all completely overwhelming. I remembered making love with him, then running from him in terror, never giving him a chance to explain. "I'm so, so sorry." He whispered. I watched as he stood in front of the door and waited. Waited for me to come to grips with all the information swirling around in my head. If what he said was true, then all the times I had died were his fault. If what he said was true, and he had really learned from his mistakes, he was trying to get it right this time. It was becoming clear to me that my resentment of Death was misplaced. And another thought swirled through my mind that we had never just sat and talked. On the heels of that another thought hit me...that I wasn't the same person now as I was then. I was a whole lot fucking stronger now than I had been in any other lifetime, and more able to handle what he was. Only one thing matter to me: I loved him. I realized with utter clarity that I always had, and did again. "I didn't mean for you to find out like this." He gestured at the bed. "I did plan to tell you tonight, since it's Halloween or All Souls' Day. It just seemed right, but not like this, not while I was making love to you. I didn't want to frighten you." I stared at him. "That's why I went as myself tonight. I was hoping it would stir your memories, maybe make things easier when I revealed myself. Each time in the past when I found you, I always told you immediately. This time I waited, and still managed to mess it up." "Was it difficult to wait?" I asked. "No. Putting my own selfish desires aside and giving you the time you needed to get to know me was...fun. Please don't run, Grey. I don't think I can handle watching you die again, then trying to find you in another life." Walking over to him, I wrapped my arms around his neck and inhaled the potent aroma of our combined scents. Gently I kissed his surprised mouth. "I love you," I said, my voice a low growl as my lips continued to brush his. "You know me, baby. You know I don't run. Not from anything. And I'm sure as hell not going to do anything as stupid as dying." His wings pulsed around us, moving the air, shaking in their joy. My hair fluttered around my face as I kissed him again. "Your wait ends now, and we begin the way we should have begun together long ago." I groaned as his strong hands caressed my back. "I've waited an eternity for you, Grey." Azrael nibbled on my neck. "Be sure this is what you want, because once you accept me, I'll never let you go. I can't." "I'm yours, Azrael. Just like you're mine, and you better know that," I said, smirking as I ground my reviving erection against him. "Yours, baby." "Praise God." "So, how do we make this work? You're not human, and I am." I snuggled in his embrace. Azrael close his eyes, and seemed to be listening to something or someone I couldn't hear. "You live your life, and do what you do so well...help those heal whose time hasn't come." Azrael answered. "And when your time finally comes, I'll escort you to Judgment for the last time. You'll be reborn an Angel of Death, my mate till time ends." "You'll be able to handle me dying again?" "Yes." He smiled at me. "It will be hard, but this time I'll know how it ends." Azrael cradled in his arms, carrying me back to bed. "I love you...you are the light to my dark, the joy to my sorrow, the life to my death. You are the other half of my soul, Beloved." I felt his big body tremble with joy as he lowered me back onto the bed. "And I love you, my Angel of Death."