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Darnell

By: ThurstonMann



How it is that we eventually choose what we like is beyond me. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the whole mess of being straight, bi or gay and add to that the subtle taste differences that come with those different varieties of connections. I might not know why I like what I like... but I know what I like and this is the story of Darnell.

I was nineteen and high school was a recent memory. I was working full time at one of the many restaurant jobs I've held in my illustrious career as a customer service representative.

Life was dull.

Darnell was the back line cook. He was in his forties but he seemed to thoroughly enjoy his work and never once complained about needing to find a "real job". Darnell was rather jovial and all around, people seemed to genuinely like him and he was, in fact, a very likable person.

I should point this out now because it would seem rather odd, like almost forced, that Darnell and I should hang out because I was a nineteen year old, chubby white boy fresh out of high school and Darnell was an older black man. However, we had similar taste in music. Both of us loving hard rock and heavy metal which I thought was unusual for Darnell but later learned that he wasn't like any other guy I'd ever meet.

I had purchased a new CD and, being the friendly sort, I recorded a copy of it for Darnell to listen to in his car. I can't remember the band, all I remember was that he took interest in my friendliness and we soon talked about music and eventually, other things we had in common.

We became fast friends and soon, it was pretty common for me to hang out at his place. We'd watch horror movies and play Playstation all hours of the night. It was the type of things that burnouts did but he and I didn't smoke. Darnell was, for all intents and purposes, a pretty good role model. He was trying to get a business degree and urged me to want some sort of higher education. In fact, if it weren't for Darnell, I wouldn't have eventually gone to college, but that's another story.

I remember that it was a Friday and we were at his place playing the latest Madden. Darnell had a rather vulgar sense of humor when the right mood hit him and he began telling me how bad I sucked at the game.

"Are you sure you even know the rules because you suck so bad, I'm surprised you aren't making gagging sounds!" he quipped.

"Gagging sounds?" I asked.

"You're right, that would mean you're sucking good," he added.

"What the hell do you mean?" his comment had me confused.

"Come on... you know when you're getting a good blow job and she's gagging on it and making slurping sounds and spit and stuff is going everywhere," Darnell tried to explain.

"My girlfriend doesn't give blow jobs like that," I admitted. "It's nothing like that."

"Seriously?" he asked, not believing that I had never had one of these great blow jobs. 

"I have no reason to lie," I said.

We played for a moment more before he paused the game. "Don't you watch porn?" he asked.

Now, I should say explicitly that I did in fact watch porn, pretty regularly. In fact, I had watched several cam girls do things with toys that I wasn't sure was possible until I saw it. But, even though I'd watched porn, I'd never watched any of the gonzo type stuff he was talking about.

"Yeah, I watch porn but I've never seen a blow job like the one you just described. It sounds messy," I said.

Darnell looked puzzled. He seemed torn in what he wanted to say next. I had never known him to be caught off guard by anything and here he was, wondering why I'd never experienced such pleasures as a sloppy blow job.

"If I show you something, you won't think it's weird, will you?" he asked, so hesitantly, that I got a little scared.

"Depends," I said honestly. "As long as it's legal..."

Darnell cut me off, "It's legal, trust me."

He got up and went into his bedroom and returned with a VHS tape and popped it into his VCR. Had I known what was going to happen over the next several hours, I'm not sure I would have stuck around but there's something to be said about letting the future come at you blindly and just enjoying it. He hit play and without much presentation, we both began viewing a white woman sucking on a very large, very thick, very black dick. She kept looking at the camera while she tried to fit it into her throat. Within a few minutes, she was gagging and spit was dripping down the shaft of the cock and she pulled it out and licked it, really worshiping its size and shape.

I was blown away.

At first, I couldn't watch it. It was so enticing though, that I found myself transfixed by the sight. Even more strange was the fact that I wasn't sure if I was excited by what she was doing or what she was doing it to. The... cock... was so massive and thick that I imagined it had its own pulse.

"See what I mean?" Darnell's voice said, interrupting the sweet gagging noises coming from the white woman on the tape.

"Yeah," I muttered, "but my girlfriend doesn't give blow jobs like that... or really... she doesn't have to. I'm not built like that."

I was suddenly very aware of how small my dick was. It was a moment that I can never undo and it made me wonder how honest my girlfriend was.

"But you said your woman said it was the biggest she's had?" Darnell questioned.

"I'm starting to wonder if that's possible. She's been with quite a few guys and with the difference in size that that thing has to me, I'm not sure she could have not had a bigger dick before." 

"Well, TV adds ten pounds," Darnell joked. "It's not that big in person."

"How do you know?" I wondered out loud.

"Well..." Darnell was apprehensive to answer.

Then, the camera switched position on the screen and I could see why. Darnell and I was watching a video he made. The... cock... in question was Darnell's massive member.

"You just tricked me into seeing your cock," I said.

"I was worried that it'd be weird," he said.

A few moments passed and we were silent as we both watched him penetrate the white woman on the tape. I couldn't believe that her vagina could take something so big.

"How big is it?" I finally asked.

"My dick?" he said. "Nine... nine and a half if I'm really happy."

I knew for a fact that my dick was six and a half inches long. I knew this because two weeks prior, my girlfriend and I decided to measure it. I couldn't believe that Darnell's dick was fifty percent larger than mine and he could tell I couldn't believe it by the look on my face.

"Seriously?" I said.

"Wanna see it?" he asked.

Now, if ever there is a question that people aren't sure they are going to answer 'yes' to, this was it but there were two things going through my mind. The first was I couldn't believe it was as big as he claimed, even seeing it on TV. The second was that the white girl on the TV seemed to be enjoying it.

"Sure," I said nervously.

Without much ceremony, Darnell pulled out his cock and though it was still flaccid, it was very, very large. I couldn't believe it.

"Let me see yours," he said.

Now, I must admit that my nervousness begged me to leave. Like I said, I was suddenly aware of how small my dick was compared to his and that was reason enough not to show it but... there was another reason.

I was very hard and the sight of Darnell's limp cock only made me harder.

"I can't," I said.

"Don't be scared," Darnell said, "I won't judge."

With a little more coaxing, I found the courage to pull out my cock. Six and a half inches of uncut and throbbing meat that, to both our surprise, had begun to leak precum. I couldn't imagine a more embarrassing situation.

Then Darnell began to stroke his cock to wake it up.

I first tried to concentrate on the video, peeking at his stroking out of the corner of my eye but soon, I just watched his cock.

What happened next, I'm not really sure how it happened. I found myself reaching over to touch it and, to my surprise, Darnell didn't stop me. I can't describe what that first feeling was like as I gripped his cock. It was so fat and I could feel his pulse. Boy, could I feel his pulse. I squeezed it and stroked it and then found myself on my knees licking it.

Any white guy that's sucked black cock knows that first moment when you taste it and you can't believe it's in your mouth. I began to notice how groomed Darnell's pubes were. They were short and tight. I think he spent as much time grooming his testicles as he did shaving his head. I looked up at him and he looked down at me and smiled, then he turned off the video and hit play on the CD player and the room filled with the sounds of, if I remember correctly, AC/DC. How fitting.

I slurped on his cock, feeling the head swell in my mouth and then I tried to stuff it into my throat.

"Be careful," he said, "I don't want to choke you on your first time."

He smiled and I continued to work on his cock. My mouth became coated with his precum and Darnell leaned back in his chair and enjoyed my mouth. I never got all nine of his inches into my mouth like the woman on the video did. I thought about how lucky she was to be so talented. I pulled his cock out and jerked it.

"I can't believe I'm doing this," I said as I worked his thick penis with my hands.

"I can't either," he said.

"Are you gay?" I asked him.

A pearl of precum came out of his cock's hole and I leaned down and licked it.

"No but I am bi," he said.

"Have you been with many guys?" I asked, suddenly worried that I was sucking on tainted cock that had been in the ass of several hundred guys.

"I've wanted to but I haven't," he admitted. "This is my first time with a guy."

I suddenly became aware of a feeling I was getting in my ass. A kind of aching that I hadn't felt before. Darnell pulled me up and he looked at my cock, his hands pulling back the foreskin and revealing a glossy head. He put it into his mouth and the entire length disappeared. He'd obviously been practicing on something. He pulled my pants down all the way and exposed my ass then wet his finger and probed me. I shook a bit as he entered me with his fingers while his mouth explored my hairy testicles.

"I want your cum," he said before wrapping his lips around the head of my cock and sucking like it was a straw. His tongue teased my cock hole and soon, I was fighting the urge to explode in his mouth.

He seemed to know how close I was because he stopped and after I got completely naked, he guided me to the bathroom. Once there he hooked up some sort of enema tool to the shower and he lubed up my ass. I didn't realize it but I had been mumbling to him how bad I need his brown cock in me. He inserted the enema tool and let the water clean me out. It wasn't as messy as I thought it would be.

After toweling off, I found myself lying next to Darnell on his bed. We were mutually playing with each other and his cock was quickly becoming my favorite play thing. His balls were loose and smooth and I found myself licking them and sucking on them like eggs. He moaned and I went further back until I was rimming him vigorously.

"You deserve to be worshiped," I said as I made my body as available to him as I could. Within the span of two hours I was finding myself to be in love with the idea of being used for his pleasure. He got out a toy from his night stand and lubed it and inserted it into my asshole. It wasn't a large toy but it still took some maneuvering to get it all in. Once he did, he worked my hole with ease and I continued servicing his cock.

After a while, I bent over on the bed and buried my face in the sheets. I felt his mouth on my ass as he kissed it and tasted it.

"Cherry," he joked about the lube flavor and the fact that he was about to pop my anal cherry.

I could feel the head of his cock press against my now loosened hole and as it penetrated, precum dripped from my cock and he reached around and rubbed it all over my pubes. He patiently fed my ass all nine inches and repeated slowly several times before I felt loosened up enough to accept his entire length.

"Fuck me with that big black cock Darnell," I moaned and soon he was thrusting into me with enough regularity and weight that our nuts made a kissing noise when they met. Whenever he'd pull out I'd back up into him, needing his thickness inside me. It was amazing.

His thrusting became more rhythmic and deep and he'd pull out long enough to taste my hole before he'd replace his cock. Then he turned me over onto my back and I spread my legs, gripping him and pulling him into me. He sucked on my nipples and worked my cock with his hand, which had become so lubed with precum that I thought I had pissed myself.

My panting and moaning only seemed to make him harder.

"If I had known you were such a freaky bitch, I would've offered you cock when we first met," he said.

"If I had known that I needed black cock, I would have taken it from you," I admitted and soon I could feel his thrust change as his cock prepared to release its seed inside me. He pushed deep and I could feel the heat of his cum as it filled my ass. I looked at him as his face contorted with pleasure as he came. As he pulled out, I felt my ass gape a bit from the girth of his cock.

"How's it look back there," I asked.

"Fucking sexy," Darnell answered. "How's it feel?"

"Amazing," I answered. I didn't want his seed dripping out of me and found myself in love with the idea of taking more. I worked my way back to his cock and licked it clean, tasting sperm for the first time and finding that, though it was bitter, I really loved it. He was surprised at my accepting his cock into my mouth after it had been in my ass but he didn't fight me and soon, his cock was licked clean and empty of its precious fluid.

I laid there for a while staring up at his ceiling and thinking about my girlfriend. I wasn't sure what to tell her or if I should tell her so I mentioned it to him.

"How do I tell my white girlfriend that I need black cock?" I asked.

"Maybe you should see if she wants black cock first," he said. I never thought of that. If she saw Darnell's cock, she'd leave me for it. I was sure.

"I don't want her to leave me," I said.

"There's another option," he offered.

Darnell discussed his plan with me and at first, I wasn't sure it was going to work. First off, my girlfriend had met him twice and both times she didn't seem to take interest in him. Second, it involved me having her bring Darnell and I beer. My girlfriend was a few years older than me and was old enough to buy beer but I had never asked for her to do it for me and I worried that it would seem suspicious.

Two weeks later and I was at Darnell's. I called up my girlfriend, April, and asked her to buy us some beer and bring it over.

Darnell and I fought the urge to fuck because we didn't want there to be anything odd when she came by and shortly, she showed up. Now, let me be clear, the only thing we had planned to do was see if she was interested in black cock. That's it. We were going to accidentally start the video and see what she said.

Plans rarely go as planned.

When April arrived, she brought the beer and a pizza. Her full figure, which I knew was Darnell's type, was dressed in jeans and a tee shirt and her red hair was pulled back in a pony tail. She didn't wear makeup often and her freckles seemed to me more of a turn on than anything. I opened a beer and after having a few sips, I sat down with April. One thing I didn't count on was how much beer she brought. It was a case. For three people, none of which were heavy drinkers, this was a lot. We watched some TV and bullshit, drinking beer after beer and before I could even put in the tape, April seemed to ask a question that had been on her mind all night.

"Is it true that black men have bigger dicks than white men?" she asked Darnell. It was an honest and somewhat innocent sounding question.

He looked at me. "Well, not all," he said.

"Hmm... but like, on average?" she asked.

Darnell seemed cornered.

"Jesus, April, why don't you just ask to see it?" I said, jokingly. I was trying to break the tension but it was too late. She was nodding.

"Yeah, can I see it?" Darnell looked at me and I smiled behind April's back. When she looked at me, I gave her a look like I couldn't believe she asked Darnell to see his cock. She turned back around and Darnell was standing with his limp cock out and much like I was, April was transfixed by it. "Holy shit!" she said, "How do you... How does..." she seemed confused.

Darnell offered her his cock and she took it, her lips wrapping around it before she said another word. I scoot in closer to watch and was amazed at how much she seemed to love his black cock. She showed it more love than she seemed to show mine.

I began undoing her clothes and listening while she noisily gagged on his dick.

"I've always wanted to try ni...," she caught herself, "black cock."

I got her pants off and Darnell and I guided her to the bedroom. Then, I did something to kind of test the waters. In for a penny, in for a pound type of thing. I started sucking Darnell's cock in front of her. She was mesmerized.

"Is this what you do when you're over here?" she asked.

I pulled his cock out of my mouth, "Can you blame me?"

I offered it to her and, I'll never forget this, she took it and gagged on it like she owned it. Darnell seemed very happy.

I took off April's shirt and rubbed her tits while she sucked on Darnell. Then I got undressed and undressed Darnell. I was very turned on by the slut of a girlfriend I had. I guided her to her back and helped Darnell enter her pussy and then offered her my cock to suck on while he drilled her tight wetness. It was gorgeous.

I pulled out of April and got behind Darnell, rimming him and sucking his balls while he made my girlfriend gape. I watched them kiss and she seemed to beg for his cum.

"Gimme that black seed," she'd say, "I want that black cum!"

"Mind if I cum inside her?" he asked me and I pushed my tongue deep into his ass in response.

By all means, my friend, cum inside her, I kept thinking.

Soon he came and when he pulled out, she jumped on his cock and sucked it again. I began eating her out and tasting my friends juices as they ran from her now gaping pussy.

April and I spent the next several hours with Darnell and she eventually watched me take him anally and knew that I wanted to share these experiences with her. It was kind of romantic watching her help him fuck me and by the end of the night, it was clear that her and I loved black cock.

Just how much, is a tale for another day.

Darnell and Carmella



My name is Darnell Lamm, that's Lamm with two M's. I'm a clerk at Bradley's Super Market downtown, or I was at the time this story begins. This is my incredible story.

******

"Okay, Sam, I'm on my way, and I'm walking not driving, so don't worry about me, okay. Sheesh! You're worse than my mother, rest her soul," I said, as I exited the Iron Skillet. Sam watched me go out and smiled; he could smile; he had my back, read looked out for me almost every night.

The Skillet was my favorite watering hole; hell, it was my only watering hole. I was a regular there after work almost every night. Since I lived and worked but four blocks away, I never had a problem with drinking and driving. Tonight, though, I would normally have driven: it was thirty-one degrees and brother that's cold, especially with a twenty knot wind adding the wind chill factor.

I was shivering and cursing myself for being too cheap to call a cab. Well, next time I'd remember—probably.

The street was dead mortal silent. No cars, no hubbub, just silent. As I passed the doorway to Jed's market, I heard something. It was like—chattering. "I looked more closely. Huddled in the doorway, as far back as it was possible to get, was a woman, no a girl. 

I stared at her. Homeless, I figured. Homeless, hopeless, and freezing to death.

"Miss, are you all right? Can I help you?" I said. She just stared back at me. She said nothing. "Miss, you can't stay here; you'll freeze to death."

"Huh?" she said

"Miss, let's go down to the all night donut shop," I said. Well, I couldn't just walk away and leave her there could I.

She looked at me strangely, like she had just thought of something. She struggled to get up, and she came with me. I helped her walk; she was stiff as could be from laying there in the cold. And, I could tell by the look of her, as she stood, that she was just skin and bones. This was not good.

We made it the one block up and one more over to the donut shop. We took a table with fixed chairs in the back—I hate fixed chair seating, but it's what they had. 

"Hot chocolate?" She nodded. I ordered two and a couple of chocolate éclairs; this girl needed the calories. I paid, and brought them back to her. She was rubbing her hands together desperately trying to warm up.

I looked her over closely for the first time. A teenager, I thought: thin, raven hair, sunken eyes, and a pasty complexion: this waif was not going to survive another night like this. Her clothes weren't exactly ragged, but all she had was a light windbreaker, sneakers, and a dirty print sundress; not exactly winter wear in Columbus, Ohio.

"Say, what's your name? How long have you been on the streets?" I dared ask her.

"And, how old are you?" I added, thinking I already knew the answer.

"Carmela, Carmela Long. A few months. I'm twenty-four," she said, her teeth still chattering. She saw the surprise on my face when she announced her age, but she said nothing.

"I take it you have no place to stay?" I said, realizing how obviously ridiculous my question was before it was even out of my mouth.

"No," she said.

Okay, she was homeless, and she'd been that way for months! I had to get her out of there, and safe. 

The walk to my place was short, four blocks, but I didn't relish the idea of trying to get this little bag of bones that far on foot with her stumbling along at a snail's pace. I pulled my cell and called a cab.

She didn't struggle. She was going to the home of a complete stranger, and she said absolutely nothing. She just nodded when I'd suggested it. I wondered if she were at all afraid of what some strange man might be trying 

to do to her. But, no, I think all she was thinking about were the éclairs she was wolfing down and staying out of the cold.

The cab ride was short, but I still had the walkup to negotiate with my little victim of the night.

Struggling a little, I was able to get my new boarder upstairs to the apartment; it was a three story walkup, and I was on the top floor.

"Okay, Carmela, I am going to put you to bed. It's almost 3:30AM," I said. I laid her on my queen size bed and took off her shoes. Her socks were filthy and they smelled something awful, and they were full of holes. Jesus, how could a nation as rich as the USA allow such misery to be. Damned Wall Streeters, I thought.

I pulled the comforter up and around her and she snuggled under it. Her eyes flickered, a hint of a satisfied smile flashed in my direction, and she slept. I headed back out through the kitchen and its small dinette which flanked my tiny living room and its skimpy complement of furnishings. 

It wasn't much, my place, but it was warm and cozy and, well, it was home.

I sacked out on the couch; it was but a few feet from the door that separated me from where my guest was sleeping soundly.

The sun is the only alarm clock that I own, and it worked perfectly today. The bad news is that I had to get up to turn it off. I pulled the curtains about half way closed and went into the kitchen to put the coffee on; I had a splitting headache, and the exercise wasn't helping. Looking at the wall clock, I noticed it was almost 10:30AM. It was then I remembered that my bedroom was occupied. Carmela? Right, her name was Carmela. I called down to the coffee shop across the street. It was late for breakfast, but I knew that Clyde would be there cooking. I called down to double my usual breakfast order, albeit three hours later than usual. I asked for it to be delivered; something I did from time to time when I was hung over, like now. I was glad I had the day off.

I knocked on the bedroom door. I heard some rustling around, and then some desperate running and coughing. "Carmela? Are you all right?" I said, listening closely at the door.

"Uh—uh—yes. Uh-uh—who are you?" she said. She was obviously confused. I smiled. This was going to be interesting. 

"I'm Darnell Lamm. We met last night."

"Huh?" The door opened, and she was still dressed in last night's clothes; well, what else would she be dressed in." 

"I'm Darnell Lamm," I repeated now face to face with her. "I found you last night. Do you remember?" I said.

I could see that she was processing the information I was unloading on her, and she wasn't sure exactly how to respond. I took the bull by the horns. "Look," I said. "Take a shower; you need it worse than I do. I've ordered breakfast up too. After you've cleaned up a bit and eaten we'll talk, okay?"

"Okay," she said. She was clearly very timid and unsure of everything.

After the shower, she emerged looking refreshed. But, she was again dressed in her filthy clothes; I'd be getting her some new stuff. The food arrived just in time. I paid the delivery boy and spread the Styrofoam takeout containers on the table. I'd set the coffee maker up some minutes before and it was almost done brewing; it smelled good.

We looked at each other, and I wondered about her past, why she was on the streets, where her family was. So I asked.

"Where's your family?' I said, sipping the black elixir.

"Don't want me. They took my baby away from me: it was illegitimate in their eyes, so they took it away from me," she said. "I left after that."

"I see. No job obviously?"

"No, I had one, but the manager kept hitting on me, so I left. I should've let him screw me; it's been tough," she said.

We talked for some time. "We've got someplace to go," I said. Finish up.

"Where?" she said.

"You need clothes. I've got a little money saved. We'll get you fixed up," I said. She stopped chewing; her mouth was still full of food. She swallowed.

"You mean it?" she said. Twenty minutes later we were standing in front of an ATM. I had five hundred in my savings; it was all of the money I'd been able to save—what can I say; it costs a lot to live in the city. I pulled out four hundred and handed it to her. 

We headed to the strip mall a few blocks up the street. I told her to knock herself out that I'd wait in the Denny's across the street. She smiled at me and asked me a question.

"Mr. Darnell, I mean Lamm, is that a birthmark on your right cheek?" I'd seen her staring at me funny a few times, and I'd wondered why; now I knew.

"Yes, kinda unsightly huh?" I said.

"No, no, it's just kinda star-shaped and I wondered if it was an injury or something, that's all," she said. 

"No, it's a birthmark," I said, repeating myself. She waved to me and left to shop. I never saw her again.

I waited for some hours before it became apparent that she'd disappeared on me. Well, no good deed goes unpunished, I guess. I headed back to my apartment. The manager's daughter was waiting for me.

"Mr. Lamm, my dad wondered if you could pay the rent today," she said, smiling.

Jenna Wilcox, my landlord's daughter, at twenty-two, was six years my junior. Pretty and sexy I had the hots for her and she knew it. 

"Yeah," I said, "come on in." I wrote the check and handed it to her. She put it on the table, leaned forward, wrapped her slimjim arms around my neck and kissed me passionately. Six months later we were married.

******

Jenna and I got along good those first years. The sex was good, the marriage typical, and the economics of it maybe a tad above average. We had just celebrated our fifth anniversary when the shit it the fan.

I lay next to her now wondering what I had done. We had been married for five years. We knew each other did we not? I had thought so, but now I wasn't so sure. No, that's not right, I did know for sure, and the answer was that I, at least, did not know her.

What the fuck was the problem? We had just had sex. She'd orgasmed and so had I. Then out of the blue she said something that I will never forget to my dyin' day regardless of what happens to us in the final analysis. 

"Darnell, you don't satisfy me. You're not terrible in bed. I just came; I have to give you that; and I—we—usually both do. But it's not enough. Tonight was a test for me, for you too. Darnell, I have taken a lover, and I am going to keep on seeing him. I had to tell you. I can't go on cheating on you like I have for these past several weeks. 

"I'll understand if you want a divorce," she said.

I looked at her in such shock that I think she was beginning to laugh, but she checked herself when the tears started clouding my vision. Well, I guess she still did have some feeling for me, after all. "What?" I choked. It was all I could think of to say.

"I know this is a shock. I don't want a divorce," she said. "I love you not him. But, I will not tread on your pride and my self-respect, by treating you like an unknowing cuckold. 

"It's up to you, dear, if you want to stay married," she said.

I looked at her and my feelings for her, my love for her began to evaporate. My heart was broken. It wasn't fair. Soon my emotions took over and began to fill me with despair. "Is your lover near?" I asked with a calm of my own that I did not feel.

"No, tonight was just for us. I told him I had to be sure. I am now," she said.

I looked at her face, so calm and—frank. "You know," I said, "when I married you, I had long thought, I mean seeing all of the stuff that was happening around us: my friends, yours, strangers in the news; that no one could ever really trust someone else to be true, rely on them. But, I changed my mind after we began going together. I really thought I had found my soulmate, my true love, the one that I could trust. It's obvious to me now that I was right in the first place.

"Thank God we don't have children," I said, as I pulled on my pants and slid my tee-shirt over my head. 

"Darnell, I wish—" She stopped in mid sentence to watch me. "I wish it weren't this way. I don't want you to hurt, and I really mean it. But, it has to be this way. But, we can still have sex once in a while if you really want it. I won't cut you off completely; I told him that. He wanted me to, but I told him you were too good to me to do that to you."

"You say sometimes," I said, as I finished dressing. I stood and stared at her. I wanted to cry, scream, even hit her; but I just waited.

"Huh?" she said, finally.

"You say you and I can have sex sometimes. How often is that? Once a week?" I said.

"Well..." My face felt hot. I was—nervous—psychologically shaken. 

"Once a month," I said.

"Something more like that," she said.

"And him, how often?' I said. She looked down not answering me.

"Once a week?" She still didn't answer me. "Two or three times a week?"

She looked up at me. "Darnell, there is no need to talk about him. But, yes, maybe two or three times a week or so with him. I won't throw him in your face, Darnell. You need never meet or even hear about him. We're not trying to humiliate you. And, you're no unknowing cuckold. You're my man, my main man. It's just that sex—I can't go on faking it anymore. I need to be able to be, do, be myself. He fulfills that need for me. But, in everything else you're the one and he has no say."

"And, I don't, haven't, I mean satisfied you all of these years. You've been faking it all of these years!" I said.

"Darnell don't torture yourself. Like I say, you can get off once in a while. Have me, and I promise to make it nice for you," she said.

"Mercy," I said.

"Huh?" She looked questioningly at me.

"A mercy fuck, maybe once a month if I'm good that's what I get. That's what you mean when you say I can get off once in a while. Well, what if I go out and get me a girlfriend, you know to get myself off more often?" I said, finally starting to stand up for myself. What if I do decide to get a divorce?

"Darnell, I told you, I'd understand if you want a divorce. I don't think it's the best thing for you though. In the distribution of assets—well. 

"And Darnell, you won't get yourself any little bit of fluff on the side, I know you; you love me. And, no, when you and I do it, it won't be any mercy fuck. It will be making love. It will be recommitting ourselves to each other. I told him that, you know. That you and I were committed to each other that we love each other.

"He didn't want me to tell you about—us. He thinks your male ego won't be able to handle it very well. Well, he doesn't know my man like I do. Like I said, I know you love me and will let me have this. That's how strong my marriage is, I told him," she said. She actually looked proud of herself—no—of me! 

I needed to know who this guy was, who my competition was. "Who is he? I said.

"His name doesn't matter, Darnell. You don't know him. It would just bother you to know his name. Let it go. Let's just be together like before, well, almost," she said.

"I can't do this, Jenna, I can't. I'm going out. I need to be alone for a while." I'd finished dressing. I turned from her and left. I was sick to my stomach, both because she had so totally humiliated me and because my marriage of five years was ending, and ending badly. I was ending badly.

She made some noises about not wanting me to go out so late, but she knew I had to have some space and didn't really push very hard for me to stay.

I had my jacket and the clothes on my back, my wallet, and absolutely no idea what I was going to do. Out of the blue, I remembered the waif that I'd tried to help out years before. I wondered how she'd fared. Her story had been similar to mine in that those she'd loved and depended on had shit on her. Of course she'd shit on me. Well, I made up my mind. I headed for a nearby motel. It was midnight. I'd shack up there for a night or two and make up my mind how I was going to handle my wife and her lover. Well, that was my plan. Plans don't always materialize like we might expect.

I rose early. I showered and dressed. I called in sick to work; I needed the day off. After eating at Denny's, I went to the bank. The shock I got there was unnerving. She'd cleaned everything out. That was what she meant when she implied that a divorce would not be economically good for me. She, and her lover, had planned on making me their wiling cuckold and provider while holding me in thrall. Well, I might not be much, but I'm not going to be fucked over without a fight. Someday, I'd have mine; I had no idea at that moment how long that someday would be in coming.

She'd left two-hundred in the account and another two-hundred in savings. Everything else was gone: CDs, cash, even the safe deposit box was empty, all my important documents, passport gone. I closed the accounts. I headed back to the motel with $460 in my wallet. I spent another night and hit the road. I decided to just disappear. 

As I strode along the street downtown, I wondered what she'd be thinking as I made no effort to contact her or return home. I wondered if she'd feel any guilt about leaving me so few options and so little money, essentially fucking me over every which way she could. My eyes narrowed. Whatever happened, to me, someday I would get mine back.

I paid for a forty dollar bus ticket and headed for Indiana. I had no papers, no proof of identity, except my Ohio driver's license, oh, and my ATM card which was now worthless because of my closing the accounts they were based on.

I had to find shelter and a job and fast. 

It was the seventh of May. Unable to find a job, I was fast running out of cash. It was then I realized that I was now jobless, homeless, and derelict. That was the first night of my new status: I was a bum.

******

"I don't know Melvin. He's just disappeared. He's been gone for a week and the store hasn't heard from him. I guess laying it on him like that was a bad idea after all. Like you said, his pride couldn't handle it," said a concerned Jenna, as she sat across the table from her lover, Melvin Goode.

"Jesus, I was afraid of this," he said. "No word at all then?"

"No, none. He cleaned out the last monies from the checking and savings accounts and closed them. He's got a little cash, but not much, and he has no credit cards; you know he never believed in them.

"He's gonna have to call sooner or later. He can't last long on the funds he has," she said, hopefully.

"He can last out there forever, Jenna. All he has to do is find a job, any job," said Melvin.

"What am I going to do, Mel? He was paying the bills. I don't work. I never have. I have no skills," said Jenna.

"Well, I could move in here with you? I work. I can take over the bills. But, if I do that, you have to divorce Darnell and marry me," he said. She looked at him strangely. She nodded. 

******

The streets were cold during the winter. I thought about moving to Arizona, but that would cost money, and I had zero funds. At least the bay of the warehouse was out of the wind. Jesus, how I hated the wind.

Fifteen years, now, of this bullshit, and not a day of it not thinking of Jenna and wondering if she even gave a shit. My mind often returned to that last week in Ohio before I'd left my home, my wife, my job, and all hope of any kind of life. Oh, that's not right either; I had a life. It was a life of self-pity and despair, but what the hey, it was more than some folks had, right.

I wondered if Jenna had divorced me; I was sure she had. Probably married her asshole lover. What a laugh. He'd cheat on here too. Fact was she just wasn't all that hot a lover. Who was I kiddin', she was a great lover; I was the asshole mediocrity, if that even. 

The weather wasn't too bad, yet. Fifty degrees, Friday, and 6:00PM the big animated sign on the bank across the street announced. I huddled in the shadow of the supermarket's loading dock; I checked the dumpster every day at this time; they usually dumped the wilted produce and sometimes other stuff at this time of day. Hey, it's how I shopped these days. 

I'd have to head back to the warehouse and the cover of its receiving bay soon. I didn't want Carlos trying to steal my place again. If he tried, I had my shiv, and I knew how to use it; one did have to protect one's turf.




Darnell and Carmella



A black Lincoln pulled up a few yards a way. I wondered what the owner of wheels like that was doing at a low class market like this one. No beluga caviar for sale inside here for sure, I thought.

The uniformed driver got out and opened the door for the lady passenger. He was a big guy, looked like he probably doubled as a bodyguard. For her part she was lovely. Gray business skirt and jacket, dark hair, 34B cups, and a butt to die for. Way out of my class for damn sure. For the first time that day I smiled to myself. The smile faded as I saw her advance toward me. I unconsciously shrank back into the shadows trying to become invisible.

She came up in front of me, staring at me. It looked like she was trying to decide something.

"What's your beef, lady," I said, more than a little uncomfortable with her being there, staring at me.

She just continued to look, and then nodded to her companion, the driver. He came toward me. He grabbed me by the arm and started to lift me.

"Gently, Albert, he's mine," she said. 

"Hey, what the hell is going on! I don't know you. Leave me alone," I said, as forcefully as I could.

Albert hustled me toward the Lincoln. Some passersby looked on amused. I was not amused.

"Hey, this is kidnapping!" I protested. "What the fuck are you..." The big man stopped, held me fast and spoke to me.

"Listen, bub, the lady wants to talk to you. After she does you can do whatever you think is right, okay?" His words, interrupting my protestations, and my train of thought stopped me. What could this rich broad want with me. It sure as hell wasn't my money or my obvious good looks, which I didn't have any of.

I was seated in the back, while the woman and the driver were up front ignoring me.

We headed into town. He pulled the Lincoln up in front of some trendy restaurant with a French name emblazoned over it. He came around and opened first her door helping her out, and then the back door.

He clearly expected me to debark, but I was getting real hot under the collar. "They ain't gonna let me in there," I said. "That's one of those ties only places, and you may not have noticed, but I ain't wearin' no goddamned tie."

"Just get out, please," said Albert. "The lady wants to have a few words with you, and then I will take you anywhere you wanna go, okay?"

"I muttered something about him bein' lucky I was in a good mood. Total bullshit of course; he'd have beat me right handed; then left handed, and then fed me to the fishes, but I had my pride.

I almost had to laugh at myself. Pride? Pride wasn't worth a fuck; look where it's gotten me, I thought. Lost me a home, a wife, a good job, my self-respect, and now I've been kidnapped by some middle-aged rich broad. Jesus was my life fucked up. I was going to have to have another long and serious talk with myself.

I was led by the arm, gently, but by the arm into the main dining area of the fanciest restaurant I'd ever been in. The maître 'd greeted us and didn't even seem to notice the rags I was wearing, or how I smelled if it came to that. I knew I smelled like last week's fish dinner, but not a peep out of him. 

I wasn't stupid. Clearly the woman had influence and he wasn't messin' with her choice of dinner companions. Finally, seated, Kong disappeared leaving me to the tender mercies of my captress.

"What would you like?" she said, smiling.

"Look, lady, I don't know what this is all about, but it's getting cold outside, and I gotta get home—back," I said.

"We can talk about that on a full stomachs, okay," she said.

"Okay, but in case there was any doubt in your mind, I'm a little short on funds," I said.

"It's on me," she said. I looked at the fucking menu and it was actually in fucking French! She saw my confusion, and giggled lightly.

"May I order for us?" she said. I nodded. I was becoming very confused. "Nothing to fancy, okay," I said. "I don't do escargot."

"Agreed," she said. She ordered in French. The waiter, who had been standing there since Kong had beat a retreat—in fear of me no doubt—noted the order and headed off to do his duty. A carafe of burgundy was placed in front of us, and damned if a tray of crackers and caviar didn't appear thirty seconds later. 

I had done some pickup labor over the course of the last year, and every dime I'd made added together would not have been able to pay for the lunch that was apparently being prepared for us at that very minute.

We nibbled on the caviar and crackers, and she made a few small, and singularly unsuccessful, attempts to get me to feel at my ease. The food came. Hamburgers and fries. "Thank God," I said aloud. She giggled again.

I looked her over as we ate. Maybe forty-five, intelligent. Beautiful, as I'd noticed earlier; and mysterious. I was stuffed. I wiped my mouth on the expensive blanket sized napkin.

"Is that a birthmark?" she said finally.

"Yes, but what does that have to do with anything," I said. She just stared and smiled. I looked askance at her.

"You don't remember me do you," she said.

"No," I said. "I know I'd remember."

"Well, you'd be wrong then. We did meet. We even spent the night together. It was years ago," she said.

"Look lady, I ain't much, but I got a little pride left, not much but a little. I know for a fact that I have never walked in the kind of circles you walk in. We never met."

"Hear me out," she said. "Twenty years ago, you found me in a doorway freezing my ass off. You fed me, gave a place to stay for the night, and then..."

"Carmela!"

She smiled broadly. "You do remember. I'm surprised you remember my name. And for the record, I have never forgotten yours, Darnell Lamm with two m's. Sorry I ran out on you that day. I mean after you gave me the money. But, I was still very confused and wary. No excuse, I know, but I was taking care of me, then. Things are different now," she said.

"Clearly," I said.

The ice broken, we talked for two hours straight. She got my story and I got hers.

She owned the damn restaurant we were eating in, that one and fifty-seven others just like it. She'd used the money I'd given her to buy some clothes, gotten herself a job at an insurance agency, listened, invested in the market in the good 'ole days and made a killing, actually several killings, and then got out.

The restaurant business was good, and she had a talent for choosing good managers and so had prospered. Her places of business were located in half a dozen Mid-Western states.

She'd seen me by accident one day, a few months earlier, as I came out of one of her restaurants, after having worked their sculling dishes and doing general cleanup for meals and a few bucks. My birthmark was the tipster. She tried to catch me, but I was lost to her before she could find me. She'd put Kong out there looking for me. He'd finally gotten lucky and seen me digging for produce at the market just yesterday. They'd made plans and decided to shanghai me today. 

"Look, Darnell, you helped me, so I'm helping you. I owe you four hundred bucks plus interest. I want you to get some clothes and a place. Then, show up here at the Chez Robards on Monday. You'll have a good job waiting for you. I owe you. Okay?" she said.

"Look," I said, "I would like to get my money back but..."

"Please, Darnell, accept my help. Don't let your male ego get in the way of this hand up. I really need to help you," she said.

I had to hand it to her. She had hit on the one argument I couldn't gainsay. My fucked up ego had got me where I was, and it was time I accepted that little reality and took a chance on getting myself out of the damnable hole I was in. 

"Okay," I said. "Beggars can't be choosers, and a job is what I really do need. I'll do a good job for you too; I promise you that."

She smiled broadly. "I know you will, Darnell," she said. "She pushed an envelope across the table to me.

"What's this?" I asked.

"Your $400 plus twenty years interest," she said. "If you like Kong can drop you at an apartment building I took the liberty of arranging for you. I think it'll fit your needs."

I nodded. "Okay, thanks. I mean it," I said. I began to tear up for the first time in twenty years.

She covered my hand with hers. "Darnell, it'll be all right. It'll be a little bit strange at first, I'm sure, but you'll be fine. Okay?"

"Yeah," I said, beginning to blubber.

******

The job was cook's assistant: ten bucks an hour. I learned the ins and outs of the kitchen fairly quickly and the rest of the business piecemeal as I went along. I was determined to do a good job and not embarrass myself. Plus I wanted to more than earn the $400 a week the job paid me. I got a small cut of the tips on my shift too; that added another twenty to thirty a week extra to my check. 

The apartment she'd set me up in was small. It reminded me of the old place I'd had when I'd found her that night twenty years before. Nothing fancy, but serviceable. Oh, and the envelop she pushed across the table to me? It had $2,000 in it: my $400 plus $80 interest for each of the twenty years. She wasn't being extravagant, but she was being fair; I appreciated that. If she were only obtainable, I would love to have been able to take her back to Ohio and rub her in Jenna's face. That would have been the crowning achievement of my entire miserable existence. But, delusions of grandeur that extravagant were not to even be contemplated. I wondered though, who her lover, husband, fiancé, whoever was.

******

Cal Whitley was my boss. He was a genuine chef, not just some fairly talented cook. He'd studied Culinary Arts in New York many years before and had even done a stint at Delmonico's in the early eighties. I'd been working at the CR for almost nine months before I saw Carmela again. It was a strange meeting.

"Darnell, someone out front wants to see yuh," said Cal.

"Me?" I said.

"Yeah, go on, I'll cover," said Cal. I wiped my hands off and headed toward the front. It was 11:00AM, the breakfast crowd had already cut country and we were getting ready for the lunch bunch.

I rounded the counter where the register was and saw her. She looked fantastic. "Carmela, you look great," I blurted, then bit my tongue. She was the boss and I didn't want to mess with her or make her feel weird.

She smiled brightly. "Thank you, Darnell, a woman needs to hear that once in a while," she said.

"Yeah, well if you're not hearing it enough, shoot your husband," I said. Okay, I was fishing.

"I'm not married, Darnell, but thank you again," she said. "Are you busy?" 

"Well, I mean, no. I mean there's the lunch crowd gonna be here soon. I mean you know," I said.

"Well, I'm the boss, and I'm giving you the rest of the day off," she said.

"But...?"

"I'm taking you to lunch, but not here. I want to talk to you. Would that be all right?" she said.

"Well, of course, but I have to tell, Cal. I'm kinda leaving him in the lurch. I mean..."

"I've taken care of that. Cal will be all right. His wife's coming in to help him. She used to work here. She was your predecessor before she decided to go to school," she said.

"Oh, okay," I said. "Sure then." 

Kong, a.k.a. Albert drove us to small bar and grill on the edge of town. The ride took seventeen minutes. I know because I kept looking at my new forty dollar watch. Not a word was spoken between us. Every once in a while, this beautiful woman would look at me and smile. I couldn't meet her eyes for any length of time; well, I was nervous; I felt like a teenager on his first date.

We pulled into the parking lot and Albert let us out of the back seat.

We headed inside of the semi-darkened, overly cool, bistro.

We took a booth against the far wall. A girl approached with menus. "You can order for us this time," said Carmela.

I looked askance at her, but she just waited for me to make the decision. "Two burgers, no fries," I said. "Oh, and a couple of light beers." The girl nodded, noted it all down, and disappeared.

"Good choices," said Carmela. "I guess you're wondering why I asked you here today."

"That would be close to being true," I said. "It's been a while. Months actually. I wondered if you were still around. But—but—it's none of my business. I mean I didn't mean..."

"Please, Darnell, relax. Okay. You're a very special guy to me. You don't have to treat me like I'm queen of the May or something," she said, still smiling all too happily.

"Uh—Carmela, you're clearly very successful and I'm just a cook's helper. A good one though, I hasten to add. Plus, you're super beautiful, and if I were any more average than I am, they'd study me," I said.

She laughed out loud now. "Yes, you are a very good employee, Darnell. I've gotten the reports. And, as for being average looking; well, that's in the eye of the beholder. 

"Darnell, I have left you alone these months because I knew you had to get your bearings. You were pretty much a mental train wreck when I found you. I know what that's like. I knew you needed time. I hope I've given you enough time. Can I ask, how are you; I mean really," she said.

I leaned back in the seat. My hands dropped to my side. I looked at her. It was a true Kodak moment. "Okay, I guess. I keep going back over what happened to me. But, I feel—I guess in control of my life more than before. That's all thanks to you," I said. 

"Do you still love her?" she said. "I mean after all of this time."

"No. Frankly, I want revenge. But, I know that's just a pipe dream. Hell, I don't even live in Ohio anymore. If she knew where and what I'd been these past fifteen years. Well, she'd have a good laugh at my expense, her and her lover. Heck she's probably married to the asshole," I said.

She looked at me strangely. "I have more than one business, Darnell. This one, the restaurants is my favorite; but I have several others. I do quite well, but I remain a private person. I don't go out much, and I move around pretty much incognito. It's how I prefer it," she said.

"You travel in an awfully fancy car, driven by a very obvious bodyguard to be trying to be incognito," I said.

She looked serious. "Albert is there because my ex has tried to hurt me. It's been a while since he last tried, but he's out there, and well..." she didn't finish.

"Jesus!" I said. "What about the cops! Is there anything I can do?" I felt like an idiot saying that. She obviously had the resources to protect herself without the assistance of a cook's helper.

She reached across the table and touched my cheek. "That's so sweet," she said. 

"I have him under surveillance. He's tried to mess with me and my life since the divorce three years ago," she said.

"Surveillance?" I said.

"Yes, I felt I needed to keep an eye on him, and I have. The interesting thing is that the PI I hired to do the job was so expensive; that after a while, I decided to buy the agency. Cost a pretty penny too, but not as much as around the clock protection. I still have costs of course, but I make a profit from the company and now it pays for itself and then some. The PI, Howard, is my employee now as are all of his old employees, all five of them: two other PI's and three clerical staff.

"Anyway, I hope you don't mind, but I checked up on you ex," she said. "Nothing obvious or especially intrusive," she said.

I sat bolt upright but said nothing. She smiled. "She did marry the—asshole," she said; "his name is Melvin Goode." 

Well, I finally knew the name of the asswipe! "They divorced two years ago. They have a child, a small boy, age five I think. She caught him cheating and gave him his walking papers.

"I checked him out too. He's not really that bad a guy, but he can't keep it in his pants. But, I guess you know all about that. He does visit the kid every month; he has visitation every third Saturday," said Carmela. "But, he's unemployed and doesn't help much monetarily."

"Jesus!" I said.

"She works now. Same job you had at one time as I recall, well, almost. She works for a supermarket. She's a checker," she said.

"So, she's gotten over me for sure," I said. "As if that was any kind of problem for her."

"Actually, she talks about you from time to time," said Carmela. "The good 'ole days she calls them."

"The PI got her to talk about me?" I said, incredulous.

"No, I did. I own the store she works at; well, I have half ownership. I bought in when they hired her. The store was going under. I had my management team put a plan for its salvation together, presented it to Henry Wilson, the then sole owner; and, he bought into it," she said.

"Carmela! Why! I mean you—you didn't—you didn't need the store; we both know that," I said. This whole thing was getting very confusing.

"Because I love you," she said, quite matter-of-factly.

"Huh?" I felt numb, stupid—no, numb and stupid. "Huh?"

"You heard me. I have since the beginning. But you were married when I came back to claim you. I didn't check up on you again, figuring you were still married, that is until I saw you that day coming out the back of one of my places here in Indiana. The rest as they say in the parlance, is history.

"So, will you marry me?" she said.

No one, and I mean but no one, in the storied history of man, had ever been as stunned as I was at that moment. But, I recovered nicely. I got down on my knees. "Carmela will you do me the honor of marrying me?" I said, ignoring her proposal.

"Yes, dear Darnell, I will," she said smiling down at me. All of a sudden there was clapping all around us in the half filled bistro. I took her hand in mine and kissed it. I smiled, stood and bowed to my audience. I pulled her up from her chair and kissed her very gently and lovingly. The clapping achieved new heights.

We spent the rest of the afternoon in conversation at her place, an amazing condo on the eighteenth floor of a downtown office building. She had maid service because her busy schedule did not allow for homemaker time. 

"Okay, so you've been spying on me for months," I said smirking. "You know how unsettling that is? A man gets to have some secrets doesn't he?"

"Hmm, I don't know about that," she said. "I may just decide to keep you on a short leash." She was giggling.

"Carmela, on a serious note, why did you buy that store, really?" I said. "I mean, she divorced me and married someone else, and I don't want anything to do with her."

"Darnell, for one thing the store is showing a profit now, and Mr. Wilson is more than grateful. He handles operations, and my staff handles PR and accounting.

"But, to answer your question. I have been checking up on you, just to make sure you were okay. But—well—you have been talking about revenge on her, I mean to other employees. Darnell, I really want you to reconsider that. I know your pride was killed, and maybe your heart too. So..."

"So you bought the store she works at? It makes no sense," I said, sure that it didn't.

"Well, yes it does, if you'll hear me out. You can have your cake and eat it too. Once she sees how successful and happy you are, can you imagine how she will feel? Particularly if you show her that you are way over her and that she really doesn't matter in your life or memory anymore. She will be eating her heart out; you'll have your revenge. But—she won't be left destroyed and ruined; I don't want you to do that to her. She may deserve it, but that would leave a scar on your soul you'd find impossible to erase," she said.

"Wow," I said. "You really are something Carmela Long. You really are something indeed."

******

We were married two months later. A few of my old friends from Bradley's were there, Carmela had seen to that. We honeymooned in Europe, Rome actually; God how I loved that city. We stayed at the Palatino a four star on the Esquiline hill run by an old friend of Carmela's. It was superb.




Darnell and Carmella



We returned after two weeks of sun and romance. The love between us was phenomenal. I had been a needy bum with nothing; she had been a woman who had once been needy and homeless but was not so any longer. 

Business-wise, I inherited the running of the restaurant chain. I learned that I had been first put in the kitchen, not only to give me a job, but for me to learn the business first hand. It seems Carmela was pretty sure of herself, and wanted all along to have me be operations chief of the chain. She handled all of the other business in her little empire, including the store where Jenna was employed.

I knew that at some point I would be face to face with Jenna once again, but when it happened it was a surprise.

We had just had a business meeting with some city fathers. Leases and taxes had been the main topics. Carmela suggested that we stop at the market and get some stuff for dinner. We ate in most of the time.

We headed into the store. There she was in register number three. It was a moderately busy day, and the owner Henry Wilson, whom I had briefly met at a meeting a few months earlier, was on duty.

"Hello, Henry," said Carmela as we entered. Jenna had not seen us, or if she had, she hadn't recognized me. Well, it had been fifteen years. We talked with the other owner for some minutes and then went to get the things we would need for dinner.

"You wanna go through her register to pay for the stuff?" said Carmella.

I looked at her. "No, I'd like to talk to her, but not under those circumstances," I said.

"Come on, let's ask Henry if he can spare her for a break," she said.

We did and he okay'd it.

I was sitting in the break room with my back to the doorway when she came in. I was well groomed and in a suit, no way she was going to recognize me after fifteen years until I turned around.

"Hi, you from the main office?" she said to my back. I turned around. In my seat.

"No, actually," I said.

"Darnell!"

"The one and only, Jenna," I said.

"Wha-wha-what are you doing here?" she said, her voice breaking up.

"I'm here to see you, actually," I said.

"After all of these years?" 

"Yeah, it has been a while, hasn't it," I said.

She just stared as if reassuring herself that what she was seeing was not some kind of mirage. She finally found her voice again. 

"You wanted to see me? I mean, now? What? Who are you? You don't work for us, but you're here in our break room. What is this?" She was uncertain...

"No, I don't work for the store. I was shopping, and I saw you checking out folks," I said, not quite leveling with her, though I had been shopping.

She took a seat across from me. "You look nice, prosperous," she said.

"You look good too," I said returning the compliment. "How have you been?"

"Okay. Work, raise a kid, pay bills. You know, the life of a single mother," she said.

"Single?" I said. I knew the score of course, but I wanted to hear say whatever she might say about the asshole who she'd cuckolded me with.

"Uh—yes, he left me a few years ago, me and Blaine," she said.

"Blaine—your child?" I said.

"Yes, he's a good boy, but a hand full sometimes," she said.

I smiled and let loose a small laugh. 

"Uh—Darnell—"she looked down and mumbled something that I couldn't catch. I waited.

"Darnell, I'd like to apologize for what I did to you those many years ago. You didn't deserve what I did, or what the asshole I was involved with did either, and that's for sure," she said. "I have wished a thousand times I could undo that mistake. But, anyway, I'm glad that I was at least able to—you know—apologize.

"But, how come you are here. I mean do you live nearby? Is this really a coincidence? I mean you coming to find me like this?" she said. She was clearly confused. I didn't have to answer; we were interrupted.

"Jenna come on. The boss' partner is here and she's got bonus checks for all of us. 

"Uh—sorry mister. Don't mean to interrupt, but..." said the interloper.

"No, no. you two go ahead. A body's gotta make a living. I understand," I said.

"Stick around if you want, Darnell. I'd love to talk to you; but I do need the money. It ain't easy these days. You understand." She was being physically pulled out of the room by the other woman. I just nodded as they disappeared.

A dozen employees were hanging around the check cashing booth. There were squeals from a couple of the women as they opened the envelopes that Henry, with Carmela by his side, was handing out. I slipped out and to the car. There'd be another day.

Fifteen minutes later, Carmela was sitting beside me in the back of the Lincoln as Albert pulled out of the parking lot.

"Bonuses," I said.

"Yes, it's something that Henry and I had engineered some time back. If the store made certain level of profit the employees would share in the rewards," she said.

"And today just happened to be the day you decided to pass out the largesse," I said. "I mean the day that I was gonna see Jenna again for the first time in fifteen years."

"Not exactly but almost," she said. "It was slated for Memorial Day. I just moved it up three weeks is all," she said. She giggled. I feigned frustration.

"For the record how much was the bonus?" I said.

"A couple of hundred each. Holiday money for them. They're a hard working and loyal crew," she said. I nodded. I hadn't thought about it, but now I wondered how Jenna was getting on economically. She had a son—Blaine. The asshole wasn't helping out; Carmela had found that much out, or rather her private, private-eye had. Then it occurred to me; Carmela would know about that too. This woman of mine would know everything; all she had to do was want to.

"Honey," I said, "how's she doing. I mean really."

"She's okay. You worried about her?" Carmela was smiling. She wasn't jealous, but she was smiling.

"Yeah, a little. She was stupid. I was stupider. But, I can't hate her. Hell, I don't even hate the asshole, though I could maybe learn to do that, especially since he is not helping pay the kid's way," I said.

"Well, she's hard up right now. She's got a catch-22. She needs a sitter, so even working overtime has minimal impact on her economically. Like I said, she's hard up: behind on her rent, and her phone is about to be cut off. Power bill's paid, and there's food in the house," said Carmela. 

"Jesus! The crazy broad really messed up with that guy, not just dumping on me. Why doesn't she sell the house, I wonder?" I said.

"You've seen what's happening in housing these days? She's lost almost all of the equity she had and the house is worth less today than when you bought it years ago," said Carmela.

"I wish there was something I could do. I feel sorry for her," I said, almost to myself.

"Well then, you'll be glad to know that there is going to be a store Memorial Day picnic. The employees themselves thought it up. Henry is footing for the meat stuffs, the workers are bringing everything else. Oh, and I've been invited along with my husband; I've accepted," she said.

Now I was smiling. This might be fun, and I had time to prepare. Then I had a thought. "Any chance of getting the asshole to show up?" I said.

I looked over at her. I'd surprised her; it felt good. "Why?" she said.

"You know, I don't have a good reason, but I do have a feeling here. I guess down deep; I am hoping this butthead will help her out and do what's right about the kid. Stupid huh?" I said.

"No, not stupid, wonderful. It's who you are mister-help-the homeless-and hopeless," she said. 

"Yeah, right, mister whatever you said," I said. I started to laugh, so did she.

******

"Jenna," said Beth, "did you see the partner, Mr. Wilson's partner?" She gushed.

"Beth, she was standing right there beside him handing out the checks. I even shook hands with her," said Jenna. 

"No, not that. I mean how beautiful she was. Rich and beautiful. I wonder who her husband is. Probably some movie star or sports icon or something," said Beth.

"Yeah, I guess, money attracts money I suppose. I wonder how rich she is?" mused Jenna.

"Say, who was that good looking guy you were talking to in the break room?" said Beth.

Jenna frowned. "Somebody from my distant past, my ex," said Jenna.

"Jesus-Mary-and Joseph, Jenna, you let that hunk of dynamite get away! I always thought you were nuts, now I know it," said Beth.

"Yeah, you're right; and you don't know the half of it," said Jenna.

******

The thirty-first was a Monday; well, Memorial Day was always on Monday, right? It was sunny and it looked like the day was gonna be a little on the warm side. The good news was that the park where the picnic was to be held was well treed, so there would be plenty of shade.

I wore my Buckeye cap and large aspect sun glasses. It was going to be a little bit difficult to recognize me at first. I wanted it that way. I was going to have a little fun. Both with Jenna, and her ex-husband if I could work it; well, that was the plan at any rate.

Carmela had managed to get the man, Melvin Goode, to come. Don't ask me how. She'd gotten somebody to talk him into being there for Jenna and their son Blaine. Maybe he figured he'd play a little catch with his boy or somethin', who knew.

Jenna was among the first to arrive. She brought her offering to the common pot: German potato salad. I remembered how good it tasted. I planned on getting my share of that one.

By 11:00AM everyone was there. Of course I didn't know anyone except Jenna, but Henry had arrived and announced that it, "looks like everyone is here." So the barbecue was fired up; the pop and the beer was flowing, and the two dozen kids or so were playing big time on the jungle gyms and what all.

Carmela and I had seats under a tree near one of the barbecues. The red hot coals were going good and the burgers and hotdogs were coming off fast and furious by noon time. Jenna had so far not noticed me. She was talking to her ex and they seemed to be kind of intent on whatever they had to say to each other. I was sure she hadn't known he was coming. But, once she had spied him; he had all of her attention. Every once in a while they'd look over toward where Blaine, I assumed it was Blaine, was playing and smile pleasantly. 

I took a turn at the tongs on one of the barbecues. Carmela wandered a few yards away to my left talking to Henry and one of the employees. I watched her and smiled whenever she looked my way. I noticed some guy, apparently part of the group but kind of off by himself leaning on the bole of the tree nearest me. Something was not right about him. But, he just stood there and watched the goings on. 

I was engaged with another of the employees, Max, and together we were creating masterpieces of hotdog culinarity! We laughed and carried on like old friends. Everyone knew I'd come with Carmela, but no one recognized me or made any special effort to play up to me. I assumed they were giving us space, and they were.

My head snapped around as I heard the guy by the tree scream "Carrrrmelllaaaa!." He rushed toward her. She, startled, turned toward the scream, a look of horror painting her features. I rushed to her.

Something glistened above me as I interposed myself between her and her assailant. I looked down at my right pec. A meat cleaver was buried four inches, I would learn later, in me. 

I watched in horror as blood spurted from the wound. At that same instant, somebody rammed himself into the perp and they crashed to the ground with a sickening thud. Screams! Everybody seemed to be screaming. I slowly melted earthward. There seemed to be an aura of quietude that began to envelop me; it was all quite natural, but I knew I was hurt real bad.

I had a sense of activity around me, but I didn't seem to be part of it.

It was dark in the room as my eyes flickered open. There was a low pitched sound coming from somewhere, a beep-beep. I was in a hospital room, that much was clear. I was very tired. I heard footsteps. "Doctor!"

"Good. He'll be okay, now," said a man's voice. I turned to it; it was a doctor checking me out. "But, it was a close thing," he said to the female on the other side of me.

Next that I knew the sun was up. Carmela was beside me. "Hello, my husband," said my wife.

"Hi," I squeaked. "How long?"

"Three days and two nights, but the doctor says you'll be fine now. "You saved my life you know," she said.

"It was the least I could do," I said.

"How are you feeling?" she said.

"Okay, I suppose. What happened to the bad guy?" I said.

"Your ex's ex killed, him, my ex, if that makes any sense. He actually killed him. They fought, and that Melvin guy smashed his head in with a skillet," said Carmela.

"There's someone else here to see you," she said.

"Who?"

Carmela turned and waved to someone to come inside of the room.

"Hi Darnell," said Jenna. "So you're the boss' new hubby. Quite a step up from me huh," she said.

"Jenna..."

"It's okay. I felt pretty put out at first by your not telling me, but it all seems so—nothing—now," she said. "We'll have to talk sometime. 

"Carmela, your wife, hired Melvin contingent upon your approval. I guess he'll he working for you at some restaurant if that's okay. 

"Uh—and he and I—well—we're getting back together. Probably," she said.

"Darnell, I am so sorry for all of the pain I put you through. You never deserved any of that, and if I'd had any sense..."

"Water under the bridge, Jenna. Long gone. And, your hubby is okay to work for me, no problem," I said. "And, yes, we'll talk sometime. I need that, but not today, okay?"

"Sure," she said. "I'll leave you alone with this good woman, now. Get well." She turned and walked out.

******

"Yes, I am fine. I got out of the hospital six weeks ago woman. I'm fine now. Just no heavy lifting for the next few months, but for all intents and purposes, I'm fine! Okay?" I protested.

"Well, okay. I'm just concerned is all," she said.

I surrendered. "I know, and I love you for it," I said.

We were sitting at the little table on the back veranda of the condo. Many floors below the people moved like ants about their daily tasks.

"I still can't get over the way things have come together," said Carmela.

"Me either," I said. "Last night was interesting. Their confessions were—I don't know something."

"Yeah, but I think they were sincere in their apologies. It was all years ago, Darnell; it's time to let it all go. They were young and so we're you—we. Like you said, I think it was, in the hospital: water under the bridge. How do you feel about her now?" said Carmela.

"Strange. I don't hate her. I thought I did once. I blamed everything on her. And, she does get a lot of the blame for what happened to me, and him too. But, part of it was me. I didn't have to let myself fall apart like that. If it hadn't been for you..."

"I'll take some credit, Darnell, but you saved me—twice. I figure we are more than even. Someday I'll probably be able to figure it out—maybe. But, like you said, it is just too strange and too complicated to make any sense for now," she said.

"Yeah, for sure,' I said.

"Where are you going to have him work?' she said. "You know he hasn't had a job in months. He was ashamed to even be around his kid, Blaine, because of his not having a job."

"I understand why he needs to work. I mean his pride and of course the practical side of it all. But for us?" I said.

"Well, he did help me, sort of," she said. "I no longer have to be looking over my shoulder for that nutcase ex of mine. He'll be fine. So where?"

"I'll leave him where he is at Chez Robards, of course," I said. "He's been there for weeks now and Cal says he's doing an okay job—not as good as I did of course."

"Of course. I knew you'd choose there. You sure you're okay?" she said, changing the subject.

"Carmela!"

"Okay, okay," she said, smiling. "I'll be quiet about it."

******



Darnell's Date



April and I spent a lot of time with Darnell. Our love of his black cock made us closer in a lot of ways. She'd spend a night with him alone and so would I and sometimes, April and I only played with each other and when she sucked me, she did so with more vigor than she had before. I attributed this to her becoming more sexually driven and found that her desire for sex often rivaled my own.

Several months had past since we shared Darnell's cock that first time and we had grown quite comfortable with having Darnell around when we went out. Sometimes it was just a dinner at a greasy spoon but there were times when we would make a bit of a date of it. Though we never showed how intimate we truly were with him in public. April and I had grown quite fond of Darnell, our feelings for him surpassing that of a "fuck buddy" and I had twice heard her tell him she loved him and figured that she did it more often when they were alone. I loved him too and had myself told him so in private, fearing that April might become jealous of him if I did admit my feelings for him in front of her.

Now, I would never have a relationship with Darnell such as the one I had with April but I was beginning to understand that there were such a variety of relationships that it wasn't important to define it as it were.

Unfortunately, Darnell had been feeling a bit... awkward.

April and I learned this when the three of us were returning from a rock show. Darnell had become unusually quiet and on the ride home he began to discuss just how awkward he was feeling.

"You know, you two don't always have to take me with you to places," he said. His demeanor was that of a saddened person.

"We like hanging out with you," I said.

"I like hanging out with you guys too but sometimes I feel like a third wheel," Darnell revealed. 

The revelation was a bit shocking. 

"I'm sorry," I said apologetically.

"Don't be sorry. We have fun but... when we're out it's Darnell and the cute white couple." Darnell said.

I had always felt that we were inclusive but I realized that he was wanting to have intimate companionship outside of the bedroom.

"Do you want to take April on a date by yourself?" I asked. April shot me a bit of a worried look as she drove.

"No... I don't know what I want," he said, frustrated.

"He wants a girlfriend of his own," April suggested.

Darnell looked at me and nodded, "I think I do."

"That chick at the show was flirting with you, why didn't you flirt back?" I asked, rather surprised that Darnell didn't at least get the girl's number.

He sighed. "Because the moment she finds out that I like sucking my friend's dick, she's gonna hit bricks. I don't need that."

"You want what April and I have," I said.

"Exactly," he admitted.

When we reached Darnell's apartment parking lot, we weren't sure if he was in a playful mood so April pulled up in front of his building and stopped the car.

"Do you want us to come up?" she asked.

Darnell didn't hesitate. "Of course."

April pulled the car into a free spot and soon we were in Darnell's living room. The door hadn't been shut a minute before I was rubbing his cock through his pants. April was more interested in finding out what kind of girl Darnell wanted.

"Do you want a girl my age?" she asked.

"I don't care about her age," he answered as I rubbed his hardening cock. "As long as she's cool with what we have."

"That's a tall order," April said as I unzipped Darnell's pants. 

"Speaking of tall order I joked, as I pulled his boner out.

April began rubbing his balls while I licked his cock head, teasing the hole. I had practiced deep throating Darnell and took the chance to stuff his cock deep into my throat. It swelled and I gagged but I held it.

"Have you tried a dating site," April asked.

"No way," Darnell said, "I've heard horror stories."

"There are websites set up for bisexual people to find others that are into the bisexual lifestyle," April said. I began to wonder how she knew this but then decided that Darnell's cock deserved my attention.

She got up and went to his computer and began questioning him further while I sucked his cock. How old was he? How many sexual partners had he had? How big was his cock? What type of woman he liked? How wild did he like his sex? The questions were far more in depth than the average site. At one point, she had me back away and hold his cock up so she could take a photograph of it and scan it into the computer. 

I gagged and slurped on Darnell for probably forty five minutes before she was done. I knew she was done because she straddled him and took his cock from me and slid it up her once tight and now well fucked pussy. I sucked on Darnell's balls while she rode him, occasionally pulling his cock from her to taste it. 

She repositioned herself so that she was facing Darnell and I rimmed her for a moment before mounting her and stuffing my cock deep into her ass. She let out a moan before she kissed Darnell deeply and I could feel his cock thrusting deep into her, his balls rubbing against mine. 

I pulled out every so often so that I could admire the view of Darnell penetrating her. His cock was long and thin but the head was massive and every time he pulled out, her wetness came with it. I begged him to cum deep inside her pussy and after several minutes of deep thrusting, his cock shot a large load deep inside her. When April stood up, I cleaned Darnell and the slurped his cum from her pussy while Darnell began sucking my cock. 

I loved his mouth.

We fucked off and on for a couple of hours before April and I left, both of us satisfied by our black lover.

For the next week, Darnell and I didn't get a chance to hang out. I had long shifts because of holidays. April visited with him most every night and when she came home, we were both too tired to play around with each other.

Sunday rolled around and we got a call from Darnell. He'd gotten a couple responses from the dating site but wanted our input.

When we arrived, he had the site open and was clicking through several profiles.

Three caught his eye. Two of them were women around April's age. Their profiles displayed their eagerness to have black men but they hadn't mentioned anything about bisexual men. The third however, was an older black woman who wanted to play with an open minded man or men. Her pictures caught Darnell's eye because she was pierced in several places and he had never seen such piercings in person.

"Should I chance the young chicks or go for the woman that seems like she knows what she likes?" he asked us. He was so happy.

April and I both agreed on the older black woman and Darnell sent a response. 

Now, this was late Sunday. Most everyone is getting ready for bed because of work on Monday so Darnell wasn't expecting a response for a couple days. To his delight though, Cleo, which was what she called herself on the site, was not just up but was on and she responded back with a simple "when? Where?"

Within an hour, there was a knock at Darnell's door. April and I agreed to only stay long enough to meet Cleo before we would excuse ourselves. When she entered, we were all surprised. She was shapely and her hair was long except for one side that was buzzed short. She wore colored contacts and was dressed moderately for the season. 

"Hello!" Cleo said delightfully. 

"Hey," Darnell said in return.

When she stepped in she took a look at April and I and smiled. He lip and nostril was pierced and the sparkled.

"Hi," I said, rather shyly. I couldn't help but think that I had seen a close up shot of her pierced vagina.

"Cleo, these are my friends, April and Thurston," Darnell said, introducing us.

"Were y'all busy? I hope I wasn't interrupting! I was just glad to find someone close and well.... it's be a minute since I've been out," she said. It was apparent that she was excited.

"Nah," April said, "We were just getting ready to head out."

Cleo made a sad face and said, "Well, it was nice meeting you two."

"You too," I said as April and I headed out the door. I smiled at Darnell and he gave me the look that he was excited. I was happy for him.

A few hours later, we got a call from Darnell. He wanted us to come by. April and I were almost about to go to bed but we knew it had to be something special for Darnell to have called us.

When we arrived, Darnell was naked and his cock was dangling and wet from sex. He ushered us into the other room where Cleo was waiting, fully naked.

"When I read that Darnell was bi I thought he was on the DL, I didn't realize you two knew he was bi and that he'd fucked you both or I would have begged you to stay," she admitted. "I've always wanted to watch a white boy take a BBC."

April seemed less shocked than I was and she began undoing my pants.

Cleo came over and helped April undress me before helping April get out of her clothes. I watched Darnell stroked as he watched us and soon I felt Cleo's hands on me. I looked at April to see if she minded but she was guiding Cleo's hands around my ass. "He can take BBC better than I can," she said to Cleo.

Cleo's tits were a bit bigger than April's and they were pierced. I leaned down and put one of the nipples in my mouth and Cleo let out a moan. The two guided me over to Darnell and I wasted no time stuffing his cock deep into my trained throat. Cleo watched excitedly and I happened to catch April's hands exploring Cleo.

I pulled Darnell's cock from my throat and offered it up to Cleo who took over voraciously then passed it to April. Darnell knew we were all his bitches for the night.

The slurping sounds were loud and they aroused me and soon I could feel Cleo's hands touching my erection. 

"I never fucked a white boy," she said while April sucked on Darnell. "I can't believe you guys live in this city!" She seemed rather elated to have found us.

She played with my foreskin while April and I took turns sucking on Darnell. His precum tasted so sweet. He knew how much I loved it and April fingered him so he produced more than average. I slurped all I could from his cock, relishing the flavor.

I turned to April and kissed her, letting Darnell's sweetness pass to her then I got on all fours and lifted my ass in the air. Cleo and Darnell took turn rimming me while April sucked on Darnell's pole. Cleo's fingers invaded me and she massaged me deep. I imagined that she'd done it before by how well she knew how to rub my insides.

Darnell got behind her and stuffed his cock into her pussy and she let out a moan that told me that she too was in love with his cock. I could have spent the entire evening just watching him fuck April and Cleo with his lovely cock but I was lucky because Darnell had fallen in love with my ass.

Before too long, Cleo spoke up. "I wanna see that dick destroy his white ass.

Darnell obliged and pulled his cock from her and mounted me. She got underneath for a better view and soon, I could feel the thick head of his cock penetrate me.

"Dayum!" Cleo said, "I think his ass was built for black dick!"

"It was," I admitted as his length entered me completely. My cock dripped and Cleo rubbed it.

"The first time I watched them fuck I couldn't believe how much Thurston could take," April admitted.

"Girl you should be talking less and eating my pussy more," Cleo said in a joking yet demanding way.

I looked back and watched April bury her face between Cleo's legs, forcing myself back into Darnell harder and harder.

"Oh Darnell!" I moaned and his hands gripped me tighter.

"I'm taking care of you," he said.

"You fucking are," I admitted.

"Damn you're a freaky white boy!" Cleo said. "I love it."

Cleo's mouth took in my cock and her lips sealed tight around its base and she began to suck hard. I was panting heavily and each thrust from Darnell forced more and more precum into Cleo's insatiable throat. Her tongue piercing massaged my glands and tease my pee hole.

Darnell swelled inside me and he unloaded his cum in several jets, filling up my ass. I felt like such a gratified whore.

As he pulled out, Cleo cleaned him off then she rimmed me while I watched April eat her pussy. 

I thought about how much we'd done in those few months. April and I had gone from having rather vanilla sex to being the vanilla in a fudge ripple of lust.

I hoped that Cleo would stick around. I hoped that maybe Cleo and I could play alone sometimes because she was so freaky. I hoped that that would be the way our life was from that point on. 

Things change though.