22 comments/ 36415 views/ 25 favorites No Kissing By: Jacqueline_Heat 'Absolutely not,' Jane said. Charlie blinked. 'Oh.' 'I mean, you're a really nice guy, but I just don't think of you that way.' Jane tucked a lustrous blonde curl behind her ear. 'I'm sorry.' 'Sure.' Charlie stuck his hands in the pockets of his jeans. 'I understand. It was just a thought.' Just a thought, circling around his brain every day for the three years. He had met Jane in high school and was immediately hypnotised by her vivid blue eyes and her pearly skin. He had loved her quick, precise wit, and whenever he successfully made her laugh, he had loved the way she was carelessly loud. She was the only person he knew, besides himself, who still read the news in paper form. Since they started university, he had developed a fascination with what lay under Jane's loose, soft clothes. Even when she wasn't in his class, even when it was a subject he actually liked, he found himself tuning out. He would imagine showering with her, lathering her skin with slippery foam, cupping her rounded buttocks or sucking on her full, heavy breasts – and then a rattle in the air conditioner or a sniggering classmate would wake him up, and he would realise he had no clue what the lecturer was talking about. Now she had turned him down. He had worked his way up from stranger to acquaintance, from acquaintance to close friend – but from now on, he would just be another name on her long list of rejected suitors. Charlie crossed his arms over his grey T-shirt, trying to look like the ground wasn't collapsing beneath his sneakers. Jane glanced at the glittering watch on her wrist. 'I have to get to class. I'm sorry.' She half turned away, and then turned back. X-rayed him with those beautiful eyes. 'Are you going to be okay?' Charlie forced a smile. 'Of course. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.' She laughed, too loud. A few students, sprawled on the grass in the distance, turned to look. Charlie's face became hot. Jane hugged him. He felt her breasts crush against his chest. A faint floral perfume filled his nose. Then she pecked him on the cheek, let go, and jogged away across the campus lawns. The imprint of her lips faded from his face like a burn. He stood there for a moment, still as a fallen tree trunk. A tall, muscular youth named Dan walked past him, strolled across the grass and flopped down next to Nina, a lithe, barefooted brunette. She squeezed his hand, leaned over and kissed him. Charlie looked away. How did everyone else make life look so easy? His next lecture was twenty minutes away. The theatre would be empty and quiet. He took a deep breath, pushed it out again, and trudged away toward the building. It was uncomfortably warm inside. Charlie shrugged off his jacket as he climbed the steps toward the back row. He chose a seat near the middle and draped the jacket over the chair to his left, so no-one would be tempted to sit next to him. Then he leaned back and shut his eyes. He couldn't sleep – he had never been able to doze off while sitting upright – but he soon found himself in a peaceful, thoughtless trance. It was the next best thing to non-existence. Fifteen minutes later his chair rattled under him as someone sat down. He opened his eyes. Nina was sitting next to his jacket and digging a notepad out of her bag. She had changed her clothes since he saw her on the grass – she wore a green satin skirt and a tank top which hugged her small, perky breasts. Her lips shone under a fresh coat of gloss. 'Didn't mean to wake you,' she whispered. Charlie waved a hand dismissively. He knew Nina, sort of – she was the resident adviser for his floor at the block of dorm rooms, so he had seen her from time to time. Looking around, he saw that the lecturer hadn't yet arrived. A few students loitered in the other rows, but not many. He wondered why she had chosen a seat so close to the back. Perhaps she, like him, planned to spend the lesson thinking rather than listening. Nina slipped a hair-tie off her wrist and pulled her smooth black hair into a ponytail. 'I missed the last lesson. Did she cover Harrison vs. Keene yet?' 'Sorry.' Charlie stretched in his chair. 'I missed it too.' Nina laughed. 'I wonder if anyone at all was here.' 'She would have given the lecture either way. She's a pro.' 'Her glasses are pretty thick. She might not even have noticed that the room was empty.' Charlie smiled as the lecturer hobbled in, clutching a sheaf of papers and a laser pointer. 'I can imagine doing that,' Charlie admitted. 'Giving a speech to an empty room. I can't see a thing without my contacts.' 'You did a minor in computer science last year, right?' 'Right.' Charlie was suprised. He hadn't thought Nina knew him so well. 'Someone posted a photo of the class online. You were the only one without glasses.' Nina grinned, showing perfect white teeth. 'Now I know your dirty little secret.' 'Damn. I'll never live that down.' 'Please be seated,' the lecturer called. The remaining students shuffled toward their chairs. 'Are you busy tomorrow night?' Nina whispered. Charlie had kept his whole week free, expecting Jane to say yes. Even though she hadn't, he remained fixated on her. If Nina was inviting him on a date, it wouldn't be fair to accept. But wasn't she with Dan? 'Are you asking me out on a date?' he asked. She shook her head vigorously. 'I have a boyfriend.' 'Dan.' Nina blushed. By the time realised she thought he had said "Damn," it was too late to correct her. 'So,' she said. 'Tomorrow night. What are you doing?' 'Just studying.' 'Do you think you can spare an hour? I kind of need a hand with something.' 'Sure,' Charlie said. 'What can I do for you?' 'Today we'll be covering Harrison vs. Keene,' the lecturer announced. 'I'll message you,' Nina whispered. Charlie nodded. He turned to face the lecturer, and thought about Jane. Her eyes, her hair, her mouth. His ribs seemed to be shrinking around his heart. *** The laundry basket was empty, and the sheets on the narrow bed were freshly washed. All the takeaway bags had been found, scrunched up and thrown into the bin, which had been tipped into the hopper downstairs. The carpet was vaccuumed, the papers neatly stacked atop the scratched wooden desk. Charlie had wanted the room to look its best for when Jane next came over. Now she wasn't coming, and he had nothing to do. Almost nothing. He glared at the pile of textbooks on the shelf. What was worse, moping or studying? There was a third option. He opened his laptop and checked his email, wondering if his parents had found the time to write anything to him. They hadn't, but he could hardly blame them, since he hadn't written anything either. He clicked over to a social network, and then another, looking for interesting posts. There wasn't much worth reading. Most of his friends seemed to have become obsessed with two hobbies – drinking, and taking pictures of themselves drinking. A few had been photographed hugging, dancing, kissing. Charlie felt a pang in his chest and he closed down the window. A few minutes later he was at a porn aggregator, typing keywords into a search field. Blonde. Busty. He found some photographs of a nude woman lounging on a sunbed by a swimming pool, tugging at an engorged nipple with one hand, rubbing at the shaved cleft between her legs with the other. Charlie felt a stirring in his underwear, but the woman didn't look enough like Jane. She was too skinny, and her eyes were brown. He went to a video site and searched for curvy blondes. He found a film of a full-figured woman wearing only high heels and a thong, kneeling on a tiled floor in front of a man. Only the man's legs and his swollen, veiny penis were visible. The woman wrapped her long, delicate fingers around the man's thick member. 'Oh my God,' she breathed. 'It's so big.' Charlie knew how cheesy it was, but the woman looked a little like Jane, except for the acrylic nails and the American accent. It was enough to make his dick throb inside his jeans. He unzipped and began stroking idly at it as the woman on the screen cooed and moaned and suckled on the tip of the cock in her hand. It was a short video. Soon the onscreen penis was spurting thick ropes of come onto the porn star's heaving breasts, but Charlie was still sitting there with a half-hard dick in his grip. Consumed with self-loathing, he clicked through to an adult videogame – a dating simulator in which he was supposed to talk a virtual blonde into stripping for him and revealing her implausible figure. The game gave him choices for the dialogue. The cartoon woman was sitting at a bar, and he was allowed to say, "Can I buy you a drink?" or "Want to come to my place?" He chose the latter, was rejected, and had to restart the game. After choosing the right answer, he was given a selection of drinks to buy her. He chose a gin and tonic, was rejected, and had to restart the game. It should have been frustrating, but Charlie couldn't help wishing that real life was more like this. That he could hit the reset button, jump back a few years and this time say all the right things to Jane, so she was just as in love with him as he was with her. Soon the virtual blonde was bouncing on a cartoon hard-on, beads of sweat drawn on her brow, giant tits swaying grotesquely. Charlie watched, jerking his fist up and down his cock until he was ready to burst, and then he ran into the tiny bathroom and squirted his load into the toilet. When he came back after washing his hands – and staring disgustedly at his reflection for a while – a message from Nina was waiting for him on one of the social networks. Can I come to your dorm room tomorrow night? she had asked. About 7? I'll bring pizza. He wrote back. Sure. See you then. *** 'You sure you're okay?' Henry asked. Apparently Jane had sent him a message immediately after rejecting Charlie. Hey, Charlie looked a bit down this morning. Could you check on him tonight? Charlie knew she meant well, but he hated having to lie to his best friend, and if she hadn't said anything, Henry would have remained completely oblivious. Charlie clenched his fists in his pocket. 'Yes, I'm sure. Relax.' 'Because you know you can talk to me, if–' 'Yeah, of course.' Charlie patted Henry on the shoulder in what he hoped was a reassuring way. 'I was feeling a bit crook yesterday morning, but I'm fine now. You know Jane, she just likes mothering me.' 'Okay, okay. I just wanted to check.' 'I appreciate that. Believe me, if I need anything, you'll be the first to know. You still owe me a favour.' Henry's eyes narrowed. 'For what?' 'For Malaysia.' Henry had spent his gap year in Seramban. He'd met a local woman and fallen in love. The feelings appeared to be mutual, but after he loaned her some money to fix her car, he never saw her again. Left without enough cash for a flight home, he would have been forced to call his parents and have the most humiliating conversation of his life. But when he emailed Charlie and asked how best to break it to them, Charlie transferred the required amount into his account. Henry made it home safely without embarassment, although they both had to live off instant noodles for a while. 'Oh, yeah,' Henry said. 'That.' 'You can repay me right now, if you want.' 'Uh, I don't quite have enough yet, but–' 'Not with money. All you need to do is tell Jane that I'm doing fine. In fact, better than fine. I look "like a tremendous weight has been lifted off my shoulders". Got that?' Henry frowned. 'Why am I telling her that?' 'Because I am fine, but she won't believe that if she hears it from me.' Charlie looked at his watch. 'I've got to get back to my room. I'm expecting someone.' 'Who?' 'Tell you all about it tomorrow.' Charlie jogged back to the dorm, leaving Henry staring bemusedly after him. When he got back to his room, he got a couple of plates out of the cupboard, along with napkins, knives and forks. He didn't have a table to eat at, so he threw a pair of cushions onto the floor as makeshift chairs. But maybe Nina would want to take the pizza somewhere nicer? Whatever. That was fine with him. He sat down on the bed. Then it occured to him that she might be bringing Dan. She hadn't specifically said it would be just the two of them. So he got out an extra plate and put down an extra cushion. He was just looking for a third fork when there was a knock at the door. He opened it. 'Hi, Nina.' Nina wore ballet flats, skinny jeans and a loose fitting cardigan. Her hair was wound into a bun, and a pair of gleaming ear rings dangled beneath her lobes. Charlie wondered if she was going somewhere after this. She was holding two pizza boxes. 'I have a delivery here for a Mr...' Charlie chuckled. 'How much do I owe you?' She beamed. 'Nothing at all. Hope you like Hawaiian.' 'Ooh, risky. Hot pineapple is very controversial. But I enjoy it, so I guess you can come in.' She entered, looking around the room. 'Wow. You keep your room clean.' 'Nah. You caught me on a good day. Can I get you something to drink?' 'What have you got?' 'Orange juice, soda water, white wine...' 'I'll have a soda water, thanks.' Charlie poured two glasses and put the bottle back in the fridge. The smell of hot cheese and spices filled the air as Nina opened the boxes. He handed a glass to Nina. She held it up. 'Cheers.' He clinked his glass against hers. 'Cheers.' They sat down on the cushions opposite one another. Only one of the pizzas was Hawaiian – Nina put a slice of the vegetarian on her plate. She ignored the knife and fork, cupping it in her hands, munching on the dough and licking her greasy fingers. 'God, that's so much better,' she said. 'I had a friend's paintball party this morning, and lunch was supposed to be included – and it was, but it was so small. I got half an egg salad sandwich and some crisps and that was it.' 'Crisps?' 'You know, chips. I like to say crisps just to avoid confusion over whether they were hot or cold.' Charlie bit into a slice of the vegetarian pizza. Swallowed. 'Crisp confusion. Can't have that.' 'I know it makes me sound British, but I also say flashlight instead of torch–' 'So no-one thinks you mean "burning stick".' 'Exactly. So I think the American English balances out the UK English.' 'What do you say when you want to sound Australian?' 'I say, "Get stuffed."' Charlie laughed. He was keen to hear what she wanted him to do, but she didn't seem eager to be the one to bring it up. 'So,' he said. 'So.' 'You mentioned that you needed a hand with something.' Nina nodded, and dabbed at her mouth with a napkin. 'Oh, okay. Yeah, I did.' Charlie waited, but she didn't say anything else. She looked like she was trying to work out how to break some bad news. 'Is it something personal?' he asked. Nina laughed, choked, gulped down some soda water. 'It's pretty personal,' she said. Charlie put down his plate. 'Well, I can keep a secret,' he said. 'As long as it's nothing illegal–' 'Oh, no, nothing like that. I was hoping...' She hesitated. 'What the hell. The short version is this: I want you to have sex with me.' Charlie laughed nervously. Nina smiled, but she didn't seem to be joking. 'Are you... is this a prank?' Charlie asked. 'Not unless you're going to say no. In which case, yes, I'm totally kidding, and we shall never speak of this again.' 'I thought you said you had a boyfriend.' 'I did. I do. That's kind of the issue.' Nina rubbed her hands together nervously. 'If Dan refuses to have sex with you,' Charlie said, 'there's something very wrong with him.' Nina's perfect cheeks coloured. 'That's not it. Let me explain. Dan and I, we've haven't made love yet. Now that we've been together a few months, he's keen, and so am I. But I'm a sex virgin, so I'm–' 'A what?' 'A sex virgin.' 'Uh, you can just say "virgin",' Charlie said. 'What?' 'You don't need to specify that you're a "sex virgin". "Virgin" means "hasn't had sex".' Nina laughed. 'Just this morning, someone was described as a paintball virgin. So they were equating that–' 'To sex, yeah. So, you were saying...' 'Right. Basically I want the first time to be special. For him, especially.' 'I think that's fairly inevitable.' Nina folded her legs neatly on the cushion. 'No, I mean really special. I want to totally blow his mind with how amazing the sex is. And I'm not naïve enough to think that I can pull that off on my first try.' Charlie boggled at her. 'So you want to have–' 'Practice. Yes. I assume sex is like anything else – you get better with experience. Right?' 'Well, yeah. But if you cheat on your boyfriend, won't you feel guilty?' Nina shook her head. A strand of silky brown hair fell over her face. 'I love him. I will never love anyone but him. I'm doing this entirely for his benefit. Why should I feel guilty about that?' 'What if he found out?' 'That's why I picked you. I never once heard you brag, or gossip, or say a bad word about anyone. It helps that you're single, and attractive, but believe me, I wouldn't even be here if I wasn't one hundred percent sure that this conversation – and anything else we do together – would remain a secret.' She raised her eyebrows. 'It will, won't it?' 'Of course. But...' Charlie couldn't fault her logic, but it just felt wrong. 'But don't you want your first time to be with someone you love, and who loves you?' 'I don't care about my first time. I want our first time to be amazing. Me and Dan's.' She met Charlie's gaze. 'So. Will you help me?' Charlie didn't know what to say. He barely knew Dan, but didn't want to stab him in the back. And it hardly seemed fair to sleep with Nina while he was infatuated with Jane. On the other hand, Jane wasn't interested in him – nor was Nina, for that matter, but she wanted his help. And it was help that he wanted to give. He hadn't had sex in a long time, and never with such a beautiful woman. Now that he was wondering what she looked like beneath her clothes, he wasn't sure he could live not knowing. Nina was looking at him with growing horror. Evidently she had thought this would be an easy sell. His hesitation had thrown her off-balance, and he now saw that a lot of her confidence had been bravado. 'Am I not your type?' She looked down at her small breasts, her narrow hips. 'Do you not find me–' 'It's not that,' Charlie said hurriedly. 'You don't have a girlfriend, do you?' 'No.' Charlie said. But he was thinking of Jane, and the word came out sounding false. 'Oh God, you do.' Nina stood up, aghast. 'I'm so sorry. I can't believe I put you in this position. I should go.' She ran to the door. Charlie scrambled up and followed her. As she grabbed the doorhandle, he put his hands over hers. 'There's no girlfriend,' he said. They stood for a moment, searching each others eyes, closer than they had ever been. 'So you'll do it?' Nina said finally. Charlie nodded, his heart fluttering. 'I'll do it.' They sat back down on the cushions, the pizza forgotten between them. 'I have three ground rules,' Nina said. 'You might want to think of some as well.' 'Uh, sure.' 'No kissing. I've had plenty of practice at that.' Charlie felt a pang of disappointment, but he supposed the rule made sense. 'No gifts,' Nina added. 'No romance generally. This is not an affair, this is not a relationship – it's just sex, pure and simple.' Charlie nodded. 'Got it. What's number three?' 'Once we're done – once I've learned all I can from you – we never speak again.' Charlie gaped at her. 'What?' 'I'm serious. I plan to forget the whole thing, and having you around will just make that more complicated. We won't be friends. We'll just be people who went to the same university for a while.' No Kissing Charlie was silent for a long moment. 'If you can't handle that,' Nina said, 'we're not doing this. Those are my rules.' 'You're a nice girl. It would be a shame to have to cut you out of my life.' He sighed. 'But if we don't do this, we'll pretty much never talk again anyway. Right?' 'Pretty much.' 'Okay.' Charlie held out his hand. Nina shook it. Her skin was soft and cool. They stared at one another for a moment. 'Uh,' Charlie said, 'do you mind if I have a quick shower first?' 'We're not doing it tonight,' Nina said. 'I'm not ready. Mentally. Free tomorrow?' 'Sure. I can come to you this time, if you want.' She grinned. 'You will. But you'll do it here.' Charlie tried to think of something clever to say. Couldn't. Nina stood, brushed down her jeans with her hands, and walked over to the door. 'See you at eight,' she said. Then she was gone. Later, Charlie lay in bed, staring at the ceiling and wondering if he'd dreamed the whole visit. Had Nina really asked him to fuck her? What was going to happen tomorrow night? He pictured himself peeling off Nina's clothes, tracing her skin with his tongue, nudging his bulging cock into her slippery virgin pussy. But in his mind, it quickly became Jane's cunt between Jane's creamy thighs, Jane's fleshy tits in his eager hands, Jane's blonde locks spilling across his pillow, Jane's pink lips pinched between his teeth. He stroked his aching cock until it spurted onto his belly. Then he sighed and went away to have a shower. *** Charlie poked the hokkein noodles with a plastic fork which seemed softer than the noodles themselves. The bustling of the refectory – echoing voices, distorted music from a distant boombox, the wind beating at the windows – made a comforting white noise, shielding him from his thoughts. 'Hey,' Jane said. He knew her voice instantly, even from just that one syllable. He turned around to see her standing near the table. Her magnificent boobs were exactly at eye level. 'Uh, hey,' he said. She sat down next to him. 'How are you doing?' 'I'm good. What about you?' 'Just "good"? Henry said you were spectacular. That it was amazing how cheerful you were.' Charlie stabbed some noodles with a fork. 'Yeah, I was in a good mood yesterday.' 'Or maybe you were lying to him, so he would lie to me.' 'What are you talking about?' She put her hand on his shoulder. He could smell her fruity perfume. 'Come on, Charlie. I know you. You can't shut me out.' 'You shut me out,' he said, and regretted it immediately. Jane was silent for a long moment. Then she said, 'I know you think you've blown your chance with me. You haven't.' He tensed up. His heartbeat was like thunder in his ears. Had she just been testing him? Would she still consider– 'You never really had a chance to begin with,' she continued. Charlie felt all the air leak out of him, like he was a punctured soccer ball. 'You also think we won't be friends any more,' Jane said. 'But you're wrong about that, too. Because you never had a shot, you haven't screwed anything up. I will always, always be here for you.' Here for me, Charlie thought. Taunting me. 'That's really nice of you,' he said. 'But do you mind if today I just eat my lunch on my own?' 'No problem.' She stood, and Charlie fought the urge to look as her skirt rode up almost to her beautiful butt. 'Someday,' she said, 'you'll understand.' *** Charlie had never felt so clean in his life. He had used almost half a bottle of shower gel, scrubbing his face, his chest, his underarms, the backs of his knees, his feet, his penis – even the cleft between his buttocks. Nina had never been this close to a man before. He knew that her own enjoyment wasn't her main objective, but it was important to him. He was determined to be a perfect specimen of manhood. He rinsed, turned off the water and towelled his body dry. Then he brushed his teeth and his tongue vigorously until all he could smell was artificial mint. He pulled on his best jeans and buttoned up a new flannelette shirt. It had looked okay in the shop, but it was a tiny bit too narrow in the shoulders. He was just trying to decide whether to change when there was a knock at the door. He went and opened it. 'Nina, hi. I–' His jaw dropped. 'Wow.' A goddess stood in the doorway. Nina had brushed her hair into a glossy mane that hung around her neck like a time-lapse waterfall. Her eyes seemed somehow bigger and brighter, thanks to gentle touches of mascara and eyeshadow around them. She wore a satiny purple top with a scooping neckline, low enough that Charlie was pretty sure she wasn't wearing a bra beneath. She wore vine-patterned stockings which stretched down her long, lithe legs to a pair of glossy high-heeled shoes. 'You look–' She pushed him inside and closed the door. 'We're not going to be flirting,' she said. 'But I know it's not just girls who need to be put in the right mood for sex. So I thought you could use some visual stimulation.' She twirled around. 'How did I do?' 'You look amazing,' Charlie said. She beamed. 'Thank you. Take off your shirt.' 'Wow. No foreplay at all.' 'I didn't say that. Off.' Charlie undid the buttons as quick as he could. 'Doesn't fit all that well anyway,' he mumbled. Soon he was topless in front of her. He was fairly fit, but still found himself sucking in his gut and clenching his muscles slightly as her gaze roamed across his flesh. 'I'm going to be relying on you,' she said, 'to tell me what feels good. So you have to be completely honest with me. Leave nothing out. Got it?' 'Okay. Sure.' Nina reached out and raked her fingernails across his ribs and down his belly. He shivered. 'Tickles. In a good way.' 'Are boys' nipples as sensitive as girls'?' 'How would I know?' 'Good point.' Nina leaned forward and sucked one of Charlie's nipples into her mouth. Charlie gasped as he felt her tongue swirl around the aureola. She released him. 'How was that?' 'I liked it,' he said. 'Dan probably will, too.' She didn't respond to that. Charlie wondered if, despite what she had told him, she did feel a bit guilty about Dan. She sucked on his other nipple, and started fumbling with his belt. He exhaled, and stroked the back of her head as she nibbled on his chest. When his hand strayed down her back toward her butt, she pulled away. 'You'll get the chance to touch me everywhere,' she said, 'and I do mean everywhere. But not right now.' She undid the buckle and pulled his jeans down his legs. His underwear came too, leaving him completely naked. Nina stared at his throbbing erection. 'Oh,' she said. 'What's wrong?' 'Nothing. I... thought it would be smaller.' Charlie wasn't sure whether to be flattered or offended. 'You've done this with other girls?' she asked. 'Sex training? Absolutely not.' 'I meant sex generally.' 'Yeah. I'm no sex virgin.' She laughed nervously. 'And it fits in there?' 'Sure.' 'Okay. I should be fine, then. Sit down on the bed.' Charlie did. She took one of the cushions from the previous night and kneeled in front of him. 'I've seen blowjob videos,' she said. 'Porn. But I've heard real life is different.' Oh my God, he thought. This is really happening. 'Well,' he said, 'male porn stars probably aren't very sensitive. I can't speak for all men, but I, uh, like to be handled gently.' Nina extended her tongue and ran it along the side of his dick, base to tip. 'Like that?' she asked. He sucked in a shaky breath. 'Yeah. Like that.' She kissed the sides gently, her exhalations tickling his skin. He sighed contentedly. 'Keep talking,' she breathed. 'Um, okay. The most sensetive part is the foreskin, the bit right beneath the head. It's... oh!' Her tongue was flicking at the tender wrinkles beneath the tip of his cock. 'This bit?' 'Yes,' he groaned. 'That's like, the male equivalant of a clitoris I guess. And the whole head is very–' Suddenly the top of his penis was enveloped by her hot, wet mouth. Her tongue rolled around the sensitive flesh, making sucking noises like a pup at its mother's teat. 'Yeah,' he gasped. 'That bit. I can barely think while you're doing that to me.' Nina released him with a pop. 'This blowjob isn't free. What other tips do you have?' He thought about making a pun and decided against it. 'You can use your hands as well,' he said. She rubbed her palm over the head of his dick. 'Like this?' 'That's good, but I was thinking about the shaft.' 'Oh, I see.' She curled her hand around his cock, squeezed, and started stroking up and down. 'Like this?' 'Yeah. And if you suck on–' He didn't need to finish the sentence. Nina slurped the tip back into her mouth and stroked a little faster as her tongue slithered around his foreskin. 'Holy shit,' he gasped. 'You're incredible.' With her free hand, she touched his balls. He flinched. 'Gentle!' She let his penis slip out of her mouth, but kept stroking it. 'I shouldn't touch there?' 'No – I mean, you can, but...' Charlie tried to figure out a way to explain something he'd never before had to articulate. 'The balls don't feel any pleasure. Only pain. But the scrotum can feel both.' 'Ah.' She raked her fingernails gently over his ball sack. 'So this is better.' He shivered. 'That's good.' It was good. And when she slurped his throbbing cock back into her mouth, it became indescribable. He was being stimulated in three different places – tip, shaft, balls – and in three different ways – sucking, stroking, scratching. He could already feel an orgasm growing in his belly. 'Okay, that's enough,' he said, reluctantly. She kept licking and suckling and squeezing. 'I'm serious,' he groaned. 'If you keep doing that I'm going to come in your mouth, and then we can't have sex.' She swallowed more and more of him, deeper and deeper into her throat. He was reaching the point of no return. 'Nina!' he gasped. He tried to pull her head away from his crotch, but she batted his hands away and clamped her lips around his trembling dick. 'Nina, I – oh God!' His penis erupted, twitching and throbbing. He felt the jets of come fill her mouth, lubricating her ministrations as her tongue kept swirling around his bursting penis until she had sucked him dry. He stayed upright just long enough to watch her swallow the last squirt before he collapsed backwards onto the bed. 'Jesus, Nina,' he breathed. Nina wiped a streak of come from her lips with the back of her hand. 'How did I do?' Charlie's heart was pounding in his chest. 'That was by far the best blowjob I've ever had.' 'Guys like it when a girl swallows, right?' 'Any guy worth a damn won't care,' he said, although secretly he had found the sight curiously satisfying. Some evolutionary instinct that hated to see sperm rejected. She shrugged. 'Well, I liked it. Kind of like pancake batter.' She glanced at her watch and stood. 'I should go.' Charlie sat up. 'What? Go? Go where?' 'Home.' Nina pointed it his slowly deflating cock. 'It'll be a while before you're good to go again, right?' 'Well, yeah, but–' 'So I'll come back tomorrow night and we can try some other stuff.' 'Contrary to what you might have heard,' Charlie said, 'most guys like cuddling after orgasm.' 'Remember why we're here. I don't need any practice with cuddling. Are you free tomorrow night, or not?' Charlie sighed. 'I'm free.' 'Great. See you at eight.' Nina slipped out the door and was gone. Charlie sat on the bed for a while, naked, listening to the silence. Commitment-free sex with a hot girl who wanted to try everything. No strings attached. Wasn't that every man's dream? Then why did he feel so empty? When he was deciding whether or not to do this, he had been consumed by wondering whether or not he should. But he had never paused to wonder whether or not he could. His penis was up to the task, but was his heart? He slumped back onto the bed, scratching his belly. Could he make love without making love? *** Nina wasn't in class. Charlie barely heard the lecturer's droning voice, barely saw the powerpoint slides, barely heard the mumbles and whispers around him. Where was she? Had he done something wrong? Something which meant she didn't want to see him? Or was he being egocentric? She could be sick. Or studying for a different class. There were any number of explanations for her absence. Whatever the reason, it was disappointing. He had been looking forward to seeing her all day, and had reserved the seat next to him with a bag. When he got back to his room, he would have to call her and check that she was all right. 'Any questions?' the lecturer asked. She waited a fraction of a second before continuing. 'Okay, then. Please read chapter 19 before next week. Email me if you have any issues.' She walked out, and Charlie started gathering his things as the class followed her. He ran into Henry on his way out. 'Hey,' Henry said. 'Where have you been?' 'Hmm?' 'I haven't seen you at the Gossamer.' 'Oh. Yeah, I've been studying.' 'So who's the girl?' Charlie glanced over, a little too sharply. 'What girl?' 'The one you were meeting the other night.' Had he mentioned a girl? Charlie didn't think so. 'A girl?' he said. 'I wish. I had a phone call scheduled with my Mum and Dad.' 'Oh. How are they doing?' 'They're good. On holiday in Perth at the moment, but they should be home in a few days.' Henry didn't look entirely convinced. 'Well, come on. Let me buy you a drink.' Charlie smiled. 'Thanks, but I have to get going. The first draft of my psych assignment is due at midnight. I've barely started.' 'But–' 'Tomorrow, okay? I'll buy you a drink. Expensive beer or cheap whisky, your choice.' Henry laughed. 'Yeah, okay. Good luck.' Charlie jogged back to his dorm, wondering what to wear for his date with Nina tonight. Not a date, he reminded himself. She has a boyfriend. But he wasn't allowed to buy her any gifts – the least he could do was look nice for her, as she had done for him. Perhaps those new chinos? He opened the door. Nina was in his bed, the sheets pulled up to her neck. 'I let myself in,' she said. 'Hope you don't mind.' 'Uh, how?' Charlie stepped in and closed the door quickly. 'Hi, by the way.' 'Hi. I'm a resident advisor. I have the master key.' 'Wow. I'm glad it's you, rather than someone else.' 'In your bed?' 'No – I mean, yes, but what I was trying to say was that I'm glad it's you with the master key.' She shifted in the bed. Charlie could see the outline of her hips beneath the sheets. 'You weren't in class,' he said. 'My dildo was too small,' she replied. He nodded before he realised that what she said hadn't made any sense. 'I went to buy a bigger one,' she said. 'To prepare.' 'Oh.' Charlie felt himself blushing, although there was no reason to be embarrassed. It was personal information, but not as personal as his cock in her mouth. 'How did it go?' he asked. 'The buying, or the inserting?' 'Uh, both.' 'Easier than expected. Are you coming in, or what?' He approached the bed. 'Why did you show up early?' She shrugged. He waited. 'I know you're going to see me naked,' she said. 'But the thought of undressing in front of you – it just made me nervous. Sorry. I'm not sure why.' Charlie closed the curtains, went back to the door and turned out the light. The room vanished. 'Thank you,' Nina said in the darkness. 'You're welcome.' Charlie walked back toward the bed, arms outstretched as his eyes adjusted. Soon he could see Nina's outline against the mattress. He kicked off his shoes, peeled off his shirt and slipped into bed beside her. The warmth of her naked body surrounded him. He leaned over to kiss her– 'No,' she said. 'Remember the rules.' 'Oh.' He had forgotten. 'But you can touch me,' she said. 'To get in the mood. If you need to.' His penis was already straining against his trousers, but he reached out to her anyway. His fingers brushed her collarbone and traced her skin down to her breast – small and soft like a water balloon. He tweaked her nipple, felt it go hard, and then slid his hand down the side of her body and reached around to cup her muscular rump. Her breaths came a little faster. Charlie's heart hammered his ribs. Nina's arms wrapped around his naked chest. One of her hands slithered up his spine to his neck and his hair. He touched the back of her thigh, then the side, then the front. He eased his hand between her legs and traced upwards to the soft, warm lips of her pussy. She was wet, and she had shaved. 'Do guys like that?' she asked. 'It's like the swallowing,' he said. 'Some men like it, but any guy who demands it is a prick.' She unbuttoned the front of his jeans and reached inside. While she wrapped her hand around his cock, he reached over to the dresser and opened up the hollowed-out romance novel in which he kept his condoms. 'You're ready,' Nina said. 'Almost.' Charlie unwrapped the condom, squeezed his cock head into it and rolled it down the shaft. 'How do you want to do this?' he asked. She swung her leg across him and crawled up, straddling him. 'Like this, first,' she whispered. His dick was straining at the air, as though it could smell pussy nearby. Nina reached back and grabbed it. 'Remember,' she said. 'Tell me everything.' He nodded. Then, realising that she could probably barely see him, he said, 'I will.' She lined him up with her entrance, and slid down. Her pussy, hot and slick, swallowed the head of his penis. Nina exhaled and rocked back and forth atop him, taking a little more of his length with each thrust. 'How does that feel?' he asked. 'You tell me.' 'Uh, it's good. Not too fast, not too slow.' She pushed further down, taking more of him in. Her pointed nipples scraped his chest. She rested her hands on his shoulders. 'Can I put my weight on you? Like this?' 'Sure.' He reached around and grabbed her buttocks, kneading them with his fingers as he felt the muscles working. Her pussy clenched his cock like a tight fist. He gasped as she pushed him in deeper and deeper. 'And we'd be kissing, right?' she breathed. 'I mean, normally.' Their faces were practically touching already. Her hair made a curtain around his head, shutting out the rest of the world. 'Yes,' he said. 'Normally.' Finally he was all the way in. They rested for a moment. He felt something inside her squeezing and releasing him. Pelvic floor muscles? He couldn't remember his high school sex education classes. 'That's good,' he said. 'Whatever it is you're doing.' 'Okay.' She started sliding back and forth again, milking his cock between her hips. She arched her back, and Charlie took the opportunity to lean forward and suck one of her breasts into his mouth. He could almost fit the whole thing inside. 'Oh, God,' she whispered. He ran his fingers up and down her spine as he thrust into her, slowly building up the tempo. Her butt cheeks bounced in his hands. He held them apart, relishing the opportunity to go deeper. 'Okay,' she groaned. 'I think I've mastered this position.' Charlie grinned. 'You sure have. What's next?' 'What would you like? Doggy-style?' Charlie would have liked doggy-style – the chance to fondle her butt some more, and watch himself disappearing into her over and over – but he knew there was only one way he would get to taste her pussy. 'Sixty-nine,' he said. She giggled. 'Haven't we done blowjobs already?' 'Not upside down. It's completely different.' 'Hmm. I'll be the judge of that.' She slid off his hard-on, dismounted and swivelled around. Soon her beautiful butt was in Charlie's face. He could see her pussy dripping in the gloom, just above her puckered anus. No Kissing 'You have another condom?' she asked. 'For later?' 'Yeah.' He felt her peel off the latex and swallow his cock whole. It seemed to go right down her throat. Maybe she had been practicing on the dildo. Charlie buried his face between her cheeks, tracing the outline of her labia with his tongue. She came up for air. 'You don't need to do that,' she gasped. 'I don't need to practice getting licked.' 'You've done it before?' 'No, but how hard could it be?' Charlie flicked her clit with the tip of his tongue. She shuddered above him. 'Pretty hard,' he said, 'if you're trying to give a blowjob at the same time.' She hesitated. He wondered what she was thinking. Perhaps she wanted his mouth on her pussy but was afraid, strangely, of being unfaithful. Perhaps she didn't want it but was afraid of being unprepared for Dan. 'Okay, go ahead,' she said, and wrapped her lips around his cock again. He felt her hand stroke his shaft, as he had taught her. He slid his finger into her pussy as he lapped at her clit, gently but with growing intensity. As she raked her nails across his balls, he pumped his finger more and more vigorously, and chased her bud of pleasure around with the tip of his tongue. Her moans sent electric vibrations through his cock. She gulped down more and more of it as she rocked back and forth on his face. 'Hom a doon?' she mumbled around his dick. He took one last slurp of her delicious juices. 'What?' She released his cock from her mouth. 'How am I doing?' 'Great. Really good.' 'Any need for more practice?' He sighed. 'Probably not,' he admitted. 'Okay. Missionary.' She climbed off him and flopped down onto her back, her smooth knees raised and parted. Charlie rolled another condom onto his slippery erection and climbed onto her, resting his elbows on either side of the pillow, careful not to trap her hair. His cock nudged at her entrance. 'You ready?' he asked. Instead of answering, she gripped his naked butt cheeks and pulled him in. Charlie moaned, his dick surrounded by her slippery ecstasy. Nina gasped, her chin tilted back to expose a pale neck. Charlie kissed it, wondering if that was off-limits. If it was, Nina didn't seem to notice. She pushed and pulled his hips, dragging him in and out of her. 'Oh Jesus,' she whimpered. 'Oh Christ.' Charlie nibbled on her earlobe, intoxicated by the smell of her shampoo. She bit down on his shoulder, dug her nails into his buttocks and began to tremble like a car with engine trouble. She was going to orgasm. Yes, he thought. Come for me. Let me thank you for this. Let me give you some pleasure. Charlie thrust faster and faster, bringing her to the brink, and with one last shove, pushed her over the edge. She screamed in his ear as she thrashed around beneath him, and he pulled her hair and she squeezed his cock with her pussy and he felt her toes curling beneath his knees and the violent motions set him off, triggering an explosion in his hard-on. The condom filled with squirt after squirt of come as he pounded her pussy, and he cried out 'Nina!' before she silenced him with her mouth, kissing him hungrily, her tongue probing at his teeth, her lips sucking and nipping at his own. He kissed her back, tasting her lip gloss and the salty flesh beneath it, feeling her breaths heaving in his face. Then she pushed him away. He tumbled sideways, slipping out of her and collapsing onto the sheets. They lay like that for a moment, shoulder to shoulder, their chests rising and falling in unison. Then Nina clambered out of bed. She produced a dress from under Charlie's desk and slipped it on. 'Nina,' Charlie said. She opened the door and left without a word. *** Charlie didn't sleep at all. He tried to call Nina, but she wouldn't answer. He sent her a message online – You okay? Call me. – and received no response after an hour. His second message – I just want to know that you're all right – went unanswered. Eventually he had to decide whether to tell one of her friends what was going on and get them to check on her, or to do nothing. He knew how important her secret was. He did nothing. He went to bed and stared at the ceiling, re-living every moment of the evening. Her scent, her taste, the feel of her hands on his skin – and the way she didn't even look at him as she walked out. He had never been so happy and so sad at the same time. *** The sun rose high on the quadrangle, lighting up the grass, the wilting bushes, the scratched park benches. Charlie had been waiting for two hours. He had skipped a tutorial and a lecture. He was prepared to miss more, if that was what it took. Not necessary. There she was, strolling out of the refectory toward one of the other campus buildings. Charlie ran up to her. 'Nina!' She turned, and smiled uncertainly. 'Do I know you?' Charlie's jaw fell open. She had spoken so genuinely that he half believed she had honestly forgotten him. The other half of him almost believed that he had imagined the whole affair. 'It's me,' he said, stupidly. 'Charlie.' 'Oh, of course. Charlie. How are you?' He could feel his face going red. 'Look. About last night–' She leaned closer. 'We can't talk,' she said. 'That was the deal.' Where had the Nina from last night gone? Who was this cold, heartless woman? Charlie was about to protest, but then he saw the sadness in her eyes. This was killing her as much as it was killing him. 'Not even to say goodbye?' he asked. 'For what it's worth,' she said, 'I almost stayed.' He managed to turn away before the tears welled up in his eyes. He heard her walk away – brisk, confident steps, fading fast. 'Charlie.' He looked over. Jane stood on the grass nearby, arms crossed. 'Hi,' he said. 'You okay?' 'Fine.' 'You've been out here for two hours.' He frowned. How did she know that? 'I walked past you,' she said. 'Three times. You didn't see me?' He shook his head. 'Sorry.' 'It's okay. What's on your mind?' 'Nothing important. Want to grab a drink with me tonight?' She opened her mouth to turn him down again. 'Just as friends,' he added. 'I'll invite Henry, too. You can bring whoever.' She smiled. 'I'd like that.' Charlie glanced at his watch. 'I shouldn't miss any more classes. See you at the Gossamer? Five thirty?' 'See you then.' He walked away without even the temptation to look back. His next class was economics. He picked a hard chair next to a pretty redhead with freckles. He thought he caught her looking at his butt as he sat down. 'Have you always been in this class?' he asked. She laughed. 'You didn't notice me?' 'No,' Charlie said. 'But I should have. I'm Charlie.' 'Sally.' She shook his hand. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, Charlie thought. 'Some friends and I are meeting at the Gossamer for a drink tonight,' he said. 'Five thirty. You should come.' She smiled. 'I might just do that.' Charlie felt a little glow inside his chest. Maybe, he thought, just sometimes, things can be that easy. No Kissing It doesn't matter how we got here. He is nameless; faceless. All that mattered is he is here, and you are readying yourself to suck his cock. No introductions; no kissing; no formalities. As soon as he walks into our bedroom, you approach him, drop to your knees, and run your hand over the bulge in his well-worn jeans. Without a word and with an urgency that betrays a mixture of anxiety and lust, and slightly shaky hands, you unbutton and unzip his jeans and reach into his shorts, pulling his cock out in front of you. For a moment, you stare, about to suck another man's cock for the first time. As you eye the skin, the veins, the tip of the shaft already glistening with precum as you lightly squeeze it in your hand, you remind yourself that you want this. And I want this. And you're damned sure he wants this too. His cock feels foreign in your hand—a little longer and thicker than mine, just different enough to notice. You take a deep breath, swallow your remaining fear and doubt, and plunge your lips right onto his cock. With the same zeal that you've sucked my cock a thousand times, you work up and down his length, sucking his balls, and grasping the base with your left hand, working it up and down as your head bobs on his cock. His moans tell you that you're doing a good job. While you work him, you reach up and grab the top of his jeans and shorts, pulling them down to his ankles. He steps over them and kicks them to the side, while pulling his shirt over his head. He is around 6 feet—a few inches shorter than me—and his body is fit and muscular but not overdone. His is the body of someone who keeps himself in good shape but isn't a narcissistic gym rat. As you keep working on him, his cock starts glistening from the mix of your saliva and his precum. The longer you suck him off, the more the doubts melt away and the lust takes over—the excitement of giving head to another guy. You move your right hand below your waist and up your simple little summer skirt, as you slide your finger under your tanga panties and start rubbing your now very wet clit. It almost embarrasses you how wet you are—after all, you're not supposed to like it this much, are you? You give a low groan through your otherwise occupied mouth as your finger touches your clit and you feel the sensation, causing you to close your eyes and shutter ever so slightly. Then you look back over your shoulder at me, sitting on the chair, watching you work him. I, too, feel conflicted. Of course I don't want you giving head to some other guy. But I do. In my fantasy I do. And I know you do to. And that is why we're where we are, with you deep throating this guy while I sit on the chair naked and slowly stroke my own cock and watch you work. Once my lust kicks in, I, too, forget the doubts and instead get wrapped up in the moment of the threesome, and the thought of a whole lot of sucking and fucking. I can't wait to join in, but for now I just enjoy the sight. You can tell you've got him turned on, as he grabs your long, straight, dark brown hair and moves your head to fuck your mouth. But you have other plans. You pull off of him, stand up, and strip. In an instant, your skirt, panties, tank top, and bra are on a pile on the floor beside you. You stand there briefly, your petite naked body and C-cup breasts glistening ever so slightly from the light sweat that comes from your excitement and anticipation. You climb on the bed on all fours, lifting your ass high in the air and inviting him to fuck your pussy, slick from your hand working ever more urgently on your clit. He takes his place behind you and slowly slides his cock into your pussy. Sucking another guy's cock? How about another guy's cock in your pussy? Sometimes when we play and I fuck you with the dildo, you imagine this—how another cock would feel. Now you are feeling it, not imagining it, and it feels fucking good. He starts pumping his cock in and out while he grabs your ass. But something is missing. You want something that you can have now that there are two men here to please you instead of just one. I'm still on the chair, still watching, still stroking, with a front row seat for a great show. But I'm about to become part of the action. "Lick me," you say, with your dark brown eyes cast my way. You don't have to tell me twice. He pulls out for a moment, his dick wet from your pussy. I climb onto the bed on my back and slide underneath your stomach, pulling my head up between your legs as you drop your hips, pressing your wet lips onto my face. I've never tasted you so wet; it intoxicates me, ever the more because I know you're so wet from taking another guy's cock. I close my eyes as I begin to lick, alternately circling your clit and flicking it with my tongue and pressing it firmly. And then, from the movement of your hips on my face and the new musky scent, I know that he has slid his cock into you again. Slowly at first, he thrusts into you. My eyes still closed, I can feel you move in rhythm with him, and I can hear his cock sliding in and out of your wetness. And over that sound, I can hear your moans, becoming increasingly urgent, as you get licked and fucked at the same time. I open my eyes to see something I never thought I'd see before: an up-close and personal view of another man's cock fucking my wife's pussy. Another time, or another day, no way. But right here, right now, it turns me on. I reach down to grab my balls with my left hand and squeeze my throbbing dick with my right. Seeing me so turned on drives you crazy, and you can feel your body getting closer to orgasm. He starts pumping faster, harder. He reaches out and grabs your hair, slamming his cock in and out of you. And as he fucks you, and my tongue works your clit and your lips, every so often my tongue hits his soaked cock. It doesn't feel taboo. It just feels like three horny people fucking. As he slides in and out, I can feel him maneuvering his cock to hit my tongue with every entry and exit. This is probably the first time he's ever had his cock licked by another guy, and I can sense it turning him on. And you too—you know what's going on underneath you, and the thought drives you wild. You can feel your orgasm welling up within you. You start almost screaming in pleasure as you push your pussy back against him in time. In a mass of release, you cum hard, jamming your rear against his crotch and your hips against my face as your body spasms from pleasure. Spent, you fall off of us and roll onto your back, panting and sweating and just catching up, letting the afterglow of your orgasm sweep over your body. After taking a moment to collect yourself, you rise from the bed. "Don't move," you tell us, as you go to the dresser and pull out the bullet vibe. You're not done, and you're not done with us. You climb back on the bed, sitting against the headboard, and you spread your legs, turn the vibrator on high, and press the bullet against your clit. You look at me with a mixture of lust and pleading, and say, "I want to see you suck his cock like I suck you." For a moment, I hesitate. I've never sucked off another guy before. But I have to admit I'm curious. What does it feel like—what does it taste like?—to give a blowjob to a guy? And more than that, I want to turn you on. You want it, and I want it. Again, right here and right now, I want to suck his cock. For you. For me. He lies on the bed on his back. Like you have done to me so many times, I climb between his spread legs, grab his cock in my hand, and begin to lick. Unsure at first, I gingerly press my tongue on his tip, tasting your pussy on him and probing his head. I never thought I'd do this—never even thought I'd want to do this—but here I am. However unsure I might be, that uncertainty vanishes as soon as you see my tongue touch his cock. You let out a barely audible "Oh yeah..." That I know this gets you hot provides all the motivation I need. With one sure motion I open my mouth and take his cock deep into my throat, locking my lips on the shaft in a slippery embrace as I slide them all the way to the base. No turning back now—I will eagerly suck him like you suck me. I know how good it feels when you give me head, so I know just how to work him. I run my tongue up and down his shaft. I lock my lips around his head, grasp my hand on his shaft, and bob my head up and down, wrapping my tongue on every surface as I go. I pull off and lightly stroke him while tonguing his balls. I move back onto him, suppressing a gag as I deep throat him. His "oh, fuck yeah" tells me that I am doing a good job. And so do yours. From your heavy breathing, I can tell you are about to cum again. I don't know who is going to cum first—you or him. So I pick up the pace, feeling him begin to thrust into my mouth as he reaches down and grabs my head. I know I've got him close when I look out of the corner of my eye and see your legs clenched against the vibe, your head thrown back, and your eyes closed in your second orgasm. But before I have time to react, he joins you in orgasm. I can feel his cock pulse in my mouth, and all of a sudden my mouth is full of his warm salty sticky cum. It seems his load is huge, and I'm unprepared for it. I try to take it all, but some dribbles out of my mouth and down my chin. Spurt after spurt shoots out of his cock, either into my throat or out my mouth. I swallow everything I can, letting the rest drip off my chin. At last, he collapses, pulling his cock, still dripping in cum, out of my mouth. I don't feel ashamed, I don't feel guilty. I just feel good. "That was so fucking hot," you whisper in my ear as you move toward us. You grab me by the shoulders and guide me down onto my back on the bed. You move your head toward his cock, and gingerly lick it, sucking up the cum that is running down its length. You swallow it, and then you move over toward my face, cleaning my chin with your tongue. Then, at last, you sink into me with a deep kiss, your tongue melting with mine. Our tongues have both sucked his cock, and now they dance with each other, our saliva and his cum mingling. You straddle me and glide your pussy down onto my cock—your second cock of the evening. As your mouth remains locked on mine, you start riding me hard. I'm so fucking turned on that I feel ready to explode. My cock slides smoothly in and out of your wet pussy as you bounce up and down on my shaft. I can hardly even get out a moan as your lips are pressed so firmly on mine. You feel me thrust with urgency, as our bodies slap against each other. At last, I push up hard into you and release, half moaning and half whimpering as I shoot my cum deep into your pussy. It's the best fucking orgasm I've ever had: wave after wave as the orgasm envelops my whole body. Satisfied, you climb off me as I lie there completely spent. I can see my cum dripping from your pussy as you move to lie down between him and me. You turn onto your side, face me, and rest your head on my shoulder and hand on my chest. He gets up, and in a flash is dressed and gone with no good-byes, no kissing, no formalities—out of our lives in all but memory. Together, we drift off to sleep.