1 comments/ 28588 views/ 5 favorites Call Me Booty By: Call Me Booty "Oh shush I am sure he knew and he is quite happy watching us now. I got one question then you can fill me in on all that I have missed with my nephews and niece. Did my brother teach you the family Muay Thai?" "He taught me a few things, to protect myself with he always said you would be a better teacher for me." "Well I don't know about that, I only held my own against him because I was smaller and his sister." "Oh funny, he was always going on about how you held back against him and could have wiped the floor with him at will." We looked at each other for a minute then started laughing. It wasn't long though before the laughter had turned to tears, we clung to each other bawling for I don't know how long, though as it turns out we had reached Washington and Thirtieth. We look outside of the taxi, her cameraman standing next to a van a short distance away, then we look at each other and the laughter comes back. She pulls two tissues out of her purse handing me one before wiping away the smears and tears. I do the same though pulling a mirror out of my purse and making sure I'm at least somewhat presentable before handing my mirror to her, two seconds after she had pulled her own out. As I put my mirror back in she hands me a card and tells me to look at the back there is another number and an address. "My home phone number and address you are staying with me tonight." She tells me with a stern look at my questioning look in her direction. "I am older than you are you know, mothering won't work on me." I say as I put my finger to her chest gently then flicking it up across her nose as she looks down. "Well if you are going to be like that maybe I should call you grandma." She tells me as she reaches in and squeezes me just above my hips, my ticklish spot. "Hah you will be there before I am if your daughter takes after her aunt or father. Though no fair he told you my ticklish spots." I gasp out holding my hands up in defeat. "Ha fair nothing, you're stronger and faster I gotta make use of every trick I got. If possible could you come see us before you visit the cemetery, I'd like to go with you." She says grinning widely then giving me a wink. "Sure I don't think that would be a problem, hopefully I'll have my own driver by then as well, that boy owes me." "I get the feeling I don't want to know, anyway I gotta get going I gotta call home and get your favorite dish cooking and get back to work. Oh yeah before I forget, my cameraman reminded me this is a good opportunity to get an exclusive interview promise from you. Not like I could tell him the real reason I wanted to not go." "Yes that sounds good, though any dinner would be awesome, prison food sucks, McDonalds sounds like the height of fine dining to me right now. Though before you run away, does anyone know you and my brother knocked boots and had kids?" "No, he may have told one or two of your friends, but he always made me be careful. He would call me from a public phone and I would do the same, he never moved in with me. My neighbors think we are just friends because he saved my life. The kids made it a little harder they were starting to talk and always called him daddy, though luckily most guys would be called daddy at that point. He visited about once a week during the day, the rest of the time when he came over was at night. Now this is hard, I want you to move in with us, but I'm not sure how exactly to play it so people don't suspect, our kids look like you and your brother." "It may not matter actually, my brother is dead I have no desire to go back to my old ways. However since my brother saved your life and you became friends it probably would work if you simply say you are trying to get me back on my feet, and an exclusive interview will get everybody to think your just using me to further your career. Something of a win-win situation, now go on get my case worker is probably climbing the walls waiting for me." She laughs as she gets out, turns and waves at me before dashing over to her cameraman. The red light keeping us there I get to watch her talking to him, his smile getting bigger and bigger before he reaches down picks her up and spins them both. The light changes and off we go, then a thought strikes me and I scoot forward to talk to the driver. "So listen, I know you don't relate what happens in your cab to many but I'm making special sure of this one. No mention of the fact my brother had kids with her, for the kids safety, I'd appreciate it if you don't tell anybody." "Well I'm going to have to tell the captain, I'm not actually a taxi driver, I'm a detective we appropriated the taxi so I could have a chance to talk to you. Trust me though no one will know besides the captain and myself, probably add a car or two to the neighborhood though." "I was going to visit the station tomorrow or today depending on how long everything else takes. So why are you doing all this?" I ask as I settle back into the seat. "We knew that the problem is we figured you would see your friends first and well I wanted to let you know what we know so you would know what to ask them." He says as he shrugs then deftly changes lanes. "Well OK so what do you know?" "Not a whole lot actually, he was found behind the grocery store at eighty-eighth and Surprise. His car was at Fortieth Street between Washington and Saint. He had nine millimeter rounds in him. We didn't find much in the area, no shell cases though there were two throwing stars under one of the trash bins. I suppose you are seeing our problem, his car was in one gang area, he was found in another, and the evidence suggests another." "I thought everybody used nines." "They do I'm talking the throwing stars, new gang appeared about 6 months before your brother died, say they are yakuza but don't have any of the characteristics." "Ah, well it's only three gangs why not get some officers in to these and see what they can find?" "That is the problem, we can't all three are very close knit, we can't get a man in. It's possible they have an informant somewhere but so far we can't find anything, everything checks out fine. I was hoping you could find some information that would lead us to whichever gang was involved." "I'll see what I can do but I wouldn't hold your breath. If my friends don't know anything of help I don't know, the only thing I can think of would be to light some fires and see what runs, which is illegal and would get me back in prison." "I can't promise anything, but I'll do everything I can to keep you out of the investigation of your fires. I want to catch the people who got your brother just as much as you do the city has gotten worse since then." "How do you know you can trust this captain of yours?" "He's my brother." I sit staring out the window, seeing a number of homeless and obvious addicts littered here and there. When the taxi pulls over again it is before a drab two story brick building, obviously government. Grabbing up my purse I exit the taxi, turn to get a phone number to get a hold of him again but he simply waves me in saying he's staying here. Inside the walls are drab olive, the floors are the dirty brown of government buildings. There is a very small reception area with an old lady receptionist perched behind a massive desk snoring quietly. I reach out and tap the bell expecting her to not wake up, instead her head snaps upright and she smiles at me. "Unless I miss my guess you are Catchada Smith." Course instead of saying my name right she says cat thada smeeth, suggesting her teeth have seen the last of their days before she has. "Yes I suppose I have the right building, could you tell me where to go?" I ask her smiling. "Oh dearie I can do better than that, I will show you, we aren't seeing anyone else for 3 hours. It's good for my old bones to get up and move around from time to time." She lisps out as she gets up from her chair, groaning as she does so. "I tell you dearie, it's better to not grow old at all, there was a time when I was a hot little thing like yourself, well maybe not as little." She tells me as she leads me deeper into the building. She keeps talking as she leads me on her slow way down first one corridor then another before stopping in front of an elevator. After a couple of moments the door opens and she ushers me inside before following me. "I tell you those were the days I would go from one club to the next always attracting men like flies to the moth. I had my pick of the litter I tell you, and yet I picked out the one bad one of the lot. He wasn't all that bad mind treated me right and tried to give me enough sex, his technique was bad though, and fast. I stayed with him, of course then a divorce was pretty scandalous no matter how warranted and would ruin a gals chances of getting another man for years, not to mention jobs would dry up and go away. He improved slowly but I think the best part was when I talked him into swinging, oh boy those were fun times, not that he was all that well liked among us gals. Still we did well enough finding partners." "There is a silver lining to everything, as my mom would tell me." Trying hard not to picture her having sex, mostly succeeding luckily. "So true, he provided me with two beautiful children, well one for sure, the second we weren't so sure but I'm pretty sure he was the lucky feller. He got me working here after our kids were in school, he up and died on me a number of years ago, but at least I'm still well liked amongst the men. The fella's over at the home are always glad to have me visit, and I always leave bowlegged. Now here is your office. No wait, you're not working here you are visiting a parole officer. Well here she is and she is anxious to see you, I had to lock her in practically to keep from annoying me down at the reception." So saying she opens the door, a tall blonde handcuffed to the chair looking rather pissed. I am ushered in to a seat as the receptionist comes in and fumbles about with the handcuffs. As she tries to unlock them I look about the teeny office room, directly behind me is a row of file cabinets, the stark unlovely grey metal ones that are the bane of every nice office. Above those are more grey metal shelves, most empty some containing legal books. Her office is largely uncluttered, a new desk pad lies atop her desk the calendar laid out across it, atop this is a folder, probably my file and a pink Macintosh computer shoved into the corner of the desk against the wall. "I am really glad the chair has wheels, I had to go to the bathroom half an hour ago." The blonde tells me as the receptionist leaves, handcuffs dangling from one hand. "Yes I think I would be as well, though be glad your bathroom has a door." I tell her with a little shudder. "I don't know how you stood that, I'd go mad or somehow hold it until after lights out. At any rate I am your parole officer, I'm supposed to have you call me Ms. Stevens but well screw that I am Gilly, not really but nobody calls me Gillian besides my mother when she's mad. You are my first and only case until tomorrow at least. Seems odd that you are the only prisoner due for release today doesn't it." "Yeah I thought that was odd myself, but I rather get the feeling somebody pulled some strings, I wasn't exactly what you would call remorseful at my parole hearing and yet here I am." "I got that feeling myself after reviewing your file, you aren't supposed to be up for parole for another year and I think four months. Now that weird stuff out of the way for the moment, I am very happy to be your parole officer that man lived next to me and I rather believe he had every intention of making me one of his victims." "I'm glad I got him before he got you." "Yes me to, I still can't believe you got as much time as you did. Now the personal stuff out of the way, I gotta tell you what having a parole officer means, I'm sure you got the file detailing all that is involved but I am also sure you have not read them yet." "Guilty as charged." I tell her with a smile, my hands held out before me. "I don't think any parolee's read those files, why they waste the paper for every one is beyond me. Now since I know you haven't read them I am going to detail all of the important and not so important parts. Legal mumbo jumbo being left out of course, I still can't understand it. I really think those lawyers put so many words in so that people don't read them, some of those briefs and contracts probably have soul ownership clauses in them. Anyway, as it stands in not legal mumbo jumbo, I am your own personal god, whatever I say is what you gotta do, and you have to abide by any rules I put you under, which are generally written out by lawyers so I'm probably not even close to how much power I have on you. Now before you get indignant or ask questions, it's pretty easy, I gotta see you one day a week, you gotta report for random drug tests when called, that day usually but I get leeway and can't call for one after four. If the cops wish to find you they come to me and you pretty much gotta be where I think you are or you can be sent back to prison. If you don't listen to me you can be sent back to prison, if you speed or break the law in any way you can be sent back to prison, jaywalking even. I know pretty screwed up but the thinking is it is better to leave you in jail for the full term than to let you out early." "Yeah I knew that last part, gal in the cell next to me got in an accident and was sent back." "Yes, Samantha I think, her parole officer I really believe was trying to sleep with her and she kept saying no. For the most part it takes a pretty major offense to get sent back. Course there is one other thing, I have this from on high, I am to be aware of your place of residence, which is normal, I am also to know of at least one hang out so I can surprise visit you in other places besides home. Normally I am only supposed to know work and home. This probably has something to do with your early parole." "Oh probably, I had a detective taxi driver, apparently they can't make any headway on finding my brothers killers and want me to find them or give them information to do it. I really think they are hoping I go after them, probably want me to kill them to." "Well that does rather put a lot of stuff about this in perspective. Now I can go with you to a common hang out, or if you prefer you can tell me an address now or later and I can find it, those GPS devices are good at finding addresses. In fact here's my card, call me any time there is a voice message system on the phones I can check from anywhere." "Tell you what come with me, I'm going to our house, well I guess mine now, I want to pick up anything I got left there and I am expecting a friend to come pick me up there. You could help me carry stuff out and make it easier to lose the cop. Now very personal question, I am going to hopefully have sex, I'm not sure how many guys there will be there and well, it would be easier on you if you say wanted some sex as well. There will either be just the one guy who won't do either of us and I'd have to find some guys or there will be more than I can handle, well maybe it's been a decade." "I... well... god it sounds sad when I say it out, but I'm a virgin. I am a 24 year old virgin and before you ask I'm not waiting for marriage, I just well never could talk to a guy. I was always going after graduation, did that twice though I almost did after high school, we got interrupted in the process of getting naked and he had to leave for a European vacation, by the time he came back I was in college." "Well it is a little sad, though to be honest I think it would have been better to wait myself. I had sex the first time at fifteen, two weeks before I joined, I knew I was going to be joining and would have to have sex and well my brother was telling me it would be better if I wasn't a virgin for that. He was right even, I didn't enjoy my first time all that much but my joining was very nice, if a lot tiring. Anyway I'm all set to be going if you don't have anything else to tell me, though I think before we go I better ask about your hymen, or rather if it is still there and to mention you don't want to tell the guys you are a virgin. I remember one girl did and well I had to beat them away from her, she passed out after six guys." I say as I stand up, purse in hand one eyebrow raised. "Well I guess I am in luck then, I lost my hymen long ago. I'm not sure I wouldn't like telling them the truth, but I suppose better if I only have one guy. I don't know if I will enjoy it after all, though I suppose I will if the tales that old slut receptionist we have tells are half true." Laughing we move to the elevator and ride it down trading makeup secrets and good stores for me to buy more. Passing the old slut receptionist we both wave to her though she is snoring away. Outside we pile into the taxi the driver looking at us with a startled expression on his face. "Gilly here is my parole officer and she has to keep a very close eye on me, so we figured what the hell let's go shopping you are gonna carry all the bags and boxes for us aren't you." I tell him holding a straight face though Gilly is roaring with laughter besides me. "I don't even do that for my wife, you have no chance of getting me to do that." He mutters a cross look on his face. I couldn't hold it any more I fall against Gilly laughing madly, the two of us roll around on the back seat laughing until we start crying. At some point during this he turned back around and started the car, muttering something about women and asking where to. "Home James it is time I returned home." I tell him after regaining some composure only to start us both laughing again. He mutters some more about women but doesn't ask any more questions simply drives. Laughter dying away I sit a bit more upright and peer around, he is going the right way though the neighborhood has seen better days and not recently. "So James, tell me how long has the old neighborhood been this bad?" "John damnit and it's been like this for about 3 years, it got worse after your brother." "Huh who knew I was close. I was making a joke so we could have some fun, it's not like you are the most agreeable of sorts. Anyway are there any suspected or known drug houses in the area? I mean it can't get this bad without there being at least one." "No that is actually the odd part, as near as we can tell people are just moving out and selling their houses cheap. At this point obviously you would want to do that but there isn't any heavy traffic, there's barely any traffic. A lot of the houses just seem to sit empty, though without a for sale sign. If I didn't know better I would say that there is a business buying up all of the houses to put in a factory but zoning is wrong and nobody is trying to change it. There are some holdouts besides your house, which I suppose is going to stay empty anyway. They call us to report people in the houses near them but when an officer shows up there's nobody, houses are locked up nothing inside visible you know the routine." He tells me half turning around to look at me, after he finishes he turns back around muttering about crazy women and their fun. "Oh shush John we are almost there, I have a request actually, see if you can find the zoning agreements for these houses and tell me which ones have a basement and which do not. If possible see who is buying them as well. My parents bought our house because it had no basement I know basements are popular here so there's gotta be something going on literally under our feet." The taxi screeches to a stop sending the two of us face first into the back of the front seat. John is sitting there cursing to himself and hitting the steering wheel before he turns back around half climbs over the seat grabs me by the head and kisses me full on the lips. Call Me Booty "Sorry but that was pure genius, leave it to a felon to come up with this stuff." He says smiling broadly as he pulls his phone up off the floor. "I did live here for 16 years you know, I wasn't always a law breaker and I had friends who had dens in the basement." I mutter as I fix my hair as best I can. He ignores me to busy punching numbers into his phone before holding it to his ear and talking fast. At least he put the car in motion again. As he finishes talking we pull up into the driveway of our house, my house I think sadly. Gilly and I pile out of the back seat and walk toward the front door before I remember and head back to John before he can get out of the car. "Sorry John but I gotta go on from here with just her, she's under orders to get to know my hang outs, you are not besides I'm expecting a friend to come pick me up here and you would get him to not stop. No offense you understand it's just well some of them are probably still doing unlawful things and they are my friends." "No I understand don't you think I should go in with you to make sure there's nobody here waiting in a bad way though?" "I can totally take care of myself, besides you see that owl up on the roof? If anyone had gotten into the house it would be facing the other way. Course if I didn't know better I would think you want to come in and get me naked." I tell him with a wink. "Well to be honest the thought has crossed my mind, but I am old married and gotta get back to the station anyway, there is one very mad taxi driver waiting for it." I laugh and wave as he closes the door and starts the taxi up, he waves back as he pulls out of the driveway and drives off. Turning back to Gilly and the front door I walk over pulling my keys out hoping that the locks are not changed. With a satisfying click the door unlocks and I do a little jump for joy eliciting a strange look from Gilly. "Oh don't look at me like that, I didn't know if the key would work, it's possible my brother changed the locks and assumed he would be here when I got out. Now stay behind me and near the door, there's no telling if someone is inside waiting or not." "You said there wasn't cause of the owl." "I've never seen that owl before, we had a hawk statue up there last time I was here and it didn't do anything." I tell her with a wink before opening the door. The door creaks a little as it opens, peering in for a second I step inside yelling out honey I'm home. I was half expecting my brother to come down the stairs making a comment about how it's been to long or something equally silly. Instead though there was nothing, just an empty house. With a sigh I move toward the kitchen slipping my shoes off before reaching the hardwood floor. Padding almost silently I survey the first floor, the kitchen is empty and dusty, same with the dining room, a pile of unopened mail sitting atop the table being a stark reminder of all that I have missed. Downstairs inspected I head up the stairs, pausing to motion Gilly to be quiet on the way. Halfway up the steps I spot it, part of a freshly stomped dandelion, no mistaking it, the parts are still moist, someone is upstairs. Carefully I move up the steps, avoiding the noisy spots. The first door is mine, looking carefully I notice a shadow moving in the crack under the door. Silently as possible I move to the far side of the door then reach across to turn the knob. As the door swings open with me pressed to the wall besides it shots ring out. The bullets tearing holes and sending dust flying on the far wall into what used to be my parents room. Gilly screams below and dashes noisily out the front door, I almost took this moment to go after whoever is trying to kill me when I hear swearing and rushed steps. They must think the door was opened by the wind and I'm running away. The first rushes through the door sliding into a turn as a second follows half a step behind. The second one stood no chance, with a swift kick his feet tangle and he slams into the wall. Giving him no chance I rush after leading in with a palm to the face then a kick to the balls as he bounces off the wall and tries to turn to get a shot at me. The pistol in his hand fires again, except up at the roof as he falls backwards down the steps, the first had stopped going down and turned to look behind him in surprise. His friend fell against him sending both tumbling down the stairs. In the jumbled mess it's impossible to tell which is which but a loud crunch at the bottom tells me at least one does not have any fight left in him. Leaping down the stairs I catch the one trying to get up. Grabbing his wrist I twist it painfully far, with a small crack the gun falls free. He tries to punch me then, I simply lean in and bring my head up into his chin, there are disadvantages to being a smidgen over five foot head butting is not one of them. His teeth snap shut with the force of my head coming up, biting into his tongue. As he grabs at his mouth I reach down and pick up the pistol, a cheap dented PPK. With a snort of derision I point the gun at him and motion him to go out the door yelling for Gilly. She is across the street talking excitedly on her phone. By the time she has crossed the street again there are sirens blaring in the distance. "Dang I've never heard them that fast. Gilly do you have cops following you around?" "Well no I don't, all I can think is there are cops in the area because they knew you were coming here." "Why do the cops care if you are coming here?" This from the man, well kid is closer to it who had tried to kill me. "Dang they didn't tell you nothing, I am Catchada Smith I just got out of prison today, that house you tried to kill me in is mine." He didn't say anything else, though his eyes got a little wider. The first cop car chose that moment to appear, except this one isn't a patrol car, it is the nondescript brown sedan of detectives. It didn't even try and stop on the street or pull into the driveway it launches over the curb and comes to a sliding stop on the grass, what is left of it. The driver door swings open and John gets out in a hurry with his gun in hand dashes to the front area of the car and leans over the ticking hood leveling his gun at us for a second before standing up and coming around the car. "You know, if I actually had grass in my yard you would be resodding the whole thing. This wonderful man here tried to shoot me he and his buddy were waiting for me in my room. His buddy is at the bottom of the stairs, I think dead, he wasn't moving at least." John takes the PPK from me, handcuffs the man sits him down then moves into my house gun drawn. The next car to come into view is a patrol car followed by two more mere seconds later. These at least are decent enough to park on the street the officers inside getting out and rushing over. John comes back out of the house holstering his gun in the process. Instead of talking to me he motions the patrol cops to him and says something to them before walking over to us, the cops rushing inside guns drawn besides one who stands at the door, gun drawn and held ready anyway. "OK so there are two problems, one you did kill the other one and this one seems to need some medical attention. The other problem is your house does have a basement, how I and the street cops managed to get here so fast." "What do you mean I have a basement, there is a closet where you would normally go into the basement and there are no windows into a basement." "Yes well, we came across information on that, when your parents bought the house they hired a contractor who came in and sealed up the windows and made a closet. I don't know why they would have done that but there is a basement. Which comes to something of a problem, your house is the only one with a basement not vacated and we can't get a search warrant on the empty houses, hopefully we can find something in your basement." "Hmmm I guess that would explain why mom was afraid of that closet, she was scared of rats. Flood in Thailand got her up close and personal with a lot of them, why she hates basements, rats like basements. Anyway yes I don't mind if you search my house, if nothing else there may be more kids trying to kill me inside and I would like to see this basement." "Thank you Ms. Smith, we will be out of your hair as fast as possible. The city will also hire a contractor to reseal the basement or open it up and repair any damages we cause in finding it. I may come and resod your yard anyway, if you want to call crab grass and dirt a yard." He walks back to the house, speaks with the cop standing there for a second then goes inside. The cop standing guard at the front door holsters his weapon and walks our way. With a nod to the two of us he takes the kid and leads him to a patrol car. On his way back he motions us to follow him into the house. Inside there are three cops and John standing at the closet under the steps staring into it. "Well I guess we won't have to break into your basement, somebody has broken out. Oh the upstairs is empty of people so you can go and collect your clothes if you wish. I'm trying to decide if we should call SWAT or go in and look." "Hmmm, well at least they left a ladder, though I do wish they had not left such a ragged hole. No light though, thorough contractor, someone hand me a flashlight I'm going to explore my basement." I announce after looking into the closet. "I don't think that would be a good idea, supposing there are more men with guns down there." John says as he hands me a flashlight. "Then maybe you should follow after me, though if the ones in the basement are as good as the ones in my room I have nothing to worry about." I say with a wink as I step into the closet and climb down. There really is no light down here if it wasn't for the flashlight I wouldn't see anything. What I do see on the other hand is rather surprising. Boxes and milk crates filled with foil packages and a hole in the wall, not a rat hole, unless said rat is as big as a cow. Walking over to the foil packages I pick one up, whatever is inside is lumpy. Just being an aluminum foil package I open it up, dropping the flashlight once in the process to find that inside is very small little plastic bags with yellow rocks. "You know you cops really should get your butts down here, there are boxes with foil packages, I opened one, little baggies of crack. I also happen to have a really big hole in the wall I think my new basement is a storeroom." "Ms. Smith I think now is not the time to be going down there, could you come up here please." One of the cops says, his head appearing sort of in the hole. Turning the flashlight off I carefully navigate back to the ladder, careful to peek up before climbing. Luckily it wasn't a problem of a crooked cop or three instead there was a bigger problem. Four new cars had parked in front of my house, all four doors sitting wide open with about 20 guys armed with assault rifles and submachine guns aiming at my house. "So John did you call SWAT?" I couldn't help but ask. "Even if I had that isn't SWAT, that's a lot of firepower and we are in a house, as in seriously screwed." "Nah not really, though you guys will want to come upstairs with me, we have a few tricks in this house." The cops all look at me puzzled as I grab Gilly and walk up the steps. They follow in short order however, all of them piling up behind me at the door to my parents room. Reaching over to the special spot I press it three times then pull my hand away as the small section swings open. Pressing the code in the knob less door opens and I usher everyone inside. Having to shove John and one of the cops out of the way I shut the door behind us with a satisfying whoosh. "Lady and gentlemen I welcome you to the Smith family bunker, there should be some guns over there in the cabinet should you wish them. There are two sections of the wall that swing out for shooting at bad guys, please do not try the window it is pretty bullet proof." John starts laughing, followed shortly after by the cops, Gilly just stares at me. Then in a mad rush she grabs me up and kisses me. "Now you are a very good first parolee, though I have a slightly embarrassing question, is there a bathroom in here?" She asks as she puts me down, her knees cinching together a little. "So now I'm special? Dang and here I though I was special for promising you sex with a guy or three. Though yes there is a bathroom, in the cabinet behind me, it's not spacious and probably will smell but it is functional." The guys are all staring at us mouths agape as Gilly giggles then rushes for the cabinet. She groans as she opens the door but goes in anyway. I ignore the cops and walk over to the window lean against it and wave. The reaction outside is almost instant, one spots me and points, two more open fire. The bullets slamming into the window and wall around it, the cops all take cover, Gilly starts praying loudly. "You know guys you could always shoot back, or do you want me to do that for you as well?" I say as I peek over my shoulder at them. They all look up at me, then at themselves then sheepishly stand up. Sidearms drawn they move up to the wall beside me until I point out the opening sections. They divide up into two groups and unlatch the sections. They count to three, at two I reach up and pull my top to the side baring my breasts to the 20 guys out there. As one they stop shooting and stare instead then the wall opens up and the cops are shooting at them. The first couple of guys fall down before the rest move into cover. The walls shut again as they reload, I move to the cleverly labeled gun cabinet and pull out a couple of Uzi submachine guns. Tossing one to John and the other to one of the cops I reach back in and pull out a pump shotgun. "John quick question, I know I'm not supposed to own a gun but does that include using one in a situation such as this?" "No you are entitled to protect yourself, though what are you going to do with a shotgun?" He asks staring at my still exposed breasts. I simply wink and wiggle my chest at him before walking to the door of the bunker. Glad to see the camera outside still works I notice one is standing just past the corner the other three are standing at the door. I move to the corner and unscrew the plug, pushing the shotgun into the resulting hole I pull the trigger. The deafening crack of the shotgun combined with the audible tearing of wood, muscle and bone drawing the attention of just about everybody. I can hear the three at the door cursing before they rush to the corner, thinking there is a shooter behind them on the steps. I pump and pull the trigger again, resulting in some more grievous bodily harm before screwing the plug back into place. I walk back to the cabinet placing the shotgun back in place and pull out my own special toy. I walk over to John and ask him to help by holding the wall up for me. "You are remarkably calm in all this." He says while pushing the wall out and holding it up. "I am so going to freak out later trust me." I reply as I sight down the barrel and pull the trigger, and grin as one of the ones outside falls down. With a quick flick the Winchester is loaded again, followed by another crack and another man down. As they scramble for cover I look over at the other cops and nod my head outside, smiling as they finally start shooting. With the bad guys scrambling for cover hitting gets harder, I take down two more with five rounds. Their numbers cut in half now they are able to fit behind the cars scattered around in front of the house. I see one at the rear of one of the cop cars peeking around the corner to shoot wildly from time to time. As he reloads I guess where his head is in relation to the trunk and fire the last round. "I was starting to wonder if you were going to run out of ammo." John comments as he sticks the Uzi I had handed him earlier out the section and starts shooting in short bursts. "I was going too eventually, old Winchester and not exactly legal by today's standards, holds 8 rounds. I wanted to get a .45 Winchester but my brother insisted I get the .30-30 instead. Something about being able to take it hunting, which I so wouldn't do but well he was the one buying so he won." I say over my shoulder as I head back to the cabinet and begin reloading. "I don't see any more moving out there, do we have any in the house up here?" John asks as I finish reloading. "Not that I can see, one of the ones you shot is still alive though." Gilly answers for me. "John there is a phone over by the bathroom if you want to call for some support. Gilly I gotta ask when did you come out of the bathroom?" "After you shot the ones out here, did you know that there is a camera in your bedroom hooked up to this?" Gilly says giving me an odd look while John walks over to the phone grumbling something. I quickly walk to the monitor and look Gilly kindly showing me how to change feeds, sure enough there is my bedroom looking mostly the same as I left it. In the middle of the screen and filling up most of it is my bed, barely showing is the low dresser I remember enjoying a few guys while bent over it. My cheeks burning I look over at John still on the phone and ask if we should go take a look out there or wait for some more cops. He stops talking to look over at me, and grins widely before telling me that we are going to wait then goes back to the conversation. I put the Winchester away then jump as one of the cops puts his shirt over my shoulders. He starts to explain that I looked cold as I turn to look up at him then shuts up as my arms go around him and bury my face in his body armor. His arms go around my trembling body after a moment and I start to sob. After a time he moves us to a different spot and we sit down. Eventually I've calmed down enough that I can look up to see Gilly kneeling there before us, a look of concern written across her face. Behind her I can see the blonde officer peeking in our direction, though his eyes are more and more focusing on her than anything else. "Are you OK? I've heard of people freaking out after something like this but it's normally something like finding a whore not collapsing in tears." "Dang Gilly you don't get out much, shoot outs are stressful and letting out emotions after is normal, not to mention a sex desire. Speaking of which, the blonde behind you fancies a roll with you. You don't happen to be married do you?" This last to the man who's arm is still draped over my shoulder. "Well no but I am waiting for the right woman." He admits his face turning red as Gilly looks behind her then moves over to the blonde cop. "It's doubtful I am the right woman for you, but I am here right now and willing." I whisper into his ear before pulling our lips together and kissing him, after a moment his mouth opens and his tongue invades mine. In no time I am on my back him half atop me, our lips never leaving each other, his hands caressing and mauling my breasts before one trails down my body and presses between my legs. After some clumsy feeling about he finds the edge of my panties and slides a finger inside of me causing me to moan into his kisses. My hips propelling my pussy up into his sliding finger making the experience better and better and easier for him to slide my panties off, with a few problems in the sliding. He mutters sorry a few times but I just reach for his belt and undo that then his pants. Pulling him atop me I tell him no problem before my hands work at sliding his pants and boxers far enough down to free his penis. Finding it hard I smile at him as I yank his pants down pull the boxers out in front to pull his hardness out then slide the boxers down. Call Me Booty I pull him down atop me, his cock poking at me but never quite getting the right spot until I wedge a hand between us grasp him and guide him to the right place. He barrels inside of me in one shove causing me to grown before I place my hands to his hips and guide him. Soon he is going in and out at a nice pace, his cock isn't super long or thick but it's big enough to touch all the good spots. As I moan and move under him, my head rolling to one side or the other I spy John still on the phone looking a little jealous and Gilly is herself on her back, the blonde with his head between her legs. At first she is staring at the ceiling with her hips moving then she starts thrashing a little and moans. Right in the middle of her orgasm he comes up for air, climbs atop her and begins inserting himself. Her legs wrap around him and he goes right inside of her, his eyes bugging, she must have pulled him in with her legs. After a second he starts moving and she is again thrashing as his ass rises and falls in time with her movements. Gilly looks over at us and smiles wide, her enjoyment quite evident with the glassy look to her eyes and frequent quiet moans. For my part I am in seventh heaven, this deflowered virgin between my legs is lasting a very respectable amount of time for the speed he is doing me. I can feel the first throes of an orgasm rising within me, though I get a little worried as he speeds up. I am glad to see he is not erratically moving yet so I should have time and throw myself into reaching that orgasm. My hips move with him, taking his thrusts deeper and making the whole experience better for the both of us when the other cop appears in the corner of my vision, his pants are open and he is stroking away at his cock. I'm enjoying myself way to much too even think of it, I simply get the virgin atop me to let me up and he shoves it home again doggy style. I motion the third cop over and take him in hand. Looking at the new cock, my hand barely wraps around him so I'm getting a little extra excited with the idea of letting him in me. Lengthwise he's a little over average I guess, not leaking fluids yet so perhaps he will last long enough to get behind me. Mouth open wide I start taking him in, inch by inch I coat this mighty member with my saliva, taking him deeper and deeper. The one behind me is starting to moan a little, he's going to finish soon. I reach up and grab the one in my mouth by the butt and use him to bounce back and forth between the two, reveling in the feel and taste of the man flesh between both sets of lips. My toes are curling with each thrust, my pussy is clenching with each withdrawal my orgasm is fast approaching. Off to the side I can barely make out Gilly, she is now riding atop her blonde. I watch her breasts bouncing up and down on him she is riding him hard she must be close to her own orgasm. Our eyes lock as she reaches up and grabs her breasts fondling at her own nipples. The pumps at me are getting ragged he has to be almost there I pull off the cock in my mouth to tell him to shoot it in me. Except there was no need he moans grabs my hips and pulls me back on him as he thrusts hard at me, his cock twitching. His orgasm sets off my own and I moan out my enjoyment as his hot fluids flood my body, spreading out to every crevice inside as he rocks back and forth pumping more in with each thrust. The man I had been sucking on wiggles his cock in my face when I finally start to come down off my orgasm he wants me to finish him off. I had a different idea however, extricating myself from the ex virgin I pull him atop me as I recline on my back. He gets the idea quickly and is soon inside of me pumping away like mad. It is not long before this new frantic cock sliding in and out of me sets off another orgasm, intensified by his continued pumping and taking one nipple into his mouth. My legs cross behind him, getting a deeper thrust as my hips rise and fall with the pumping. His cock opening me up, I rather feel like a sausage wrap getting filled as he speeds up even more. The pumping is so hard I actually begin to slide a little at a time across the floor, after a short time I find myself looking over at the blonde Gilly is riding. I lean my head back a little and watch her atop him hands to her own breasts, eyes closed riding him fast and starting to get a little erratic. "Gilly lean forward it feels just as good and he can play with your breasts." I manage to croak out in encouragement as I get fucked. As she leans forward the blonde taking the cue to maul at her breasts her ass going a mile a minute the man atop me starts to get erratic. I wrap my arms around him and hook my feet together to give him the best access at my flooded depths as I feel yet another orgasm coming. Gilly beside us screams out her orgasm, her ass jerking up and down, the blonde grabs hold and pumps himself into her. My lover chooses this moment to shoot his load, so now there are two people having orgasms then three, his hot fluids send me sailing off to another orgasm then amazingly the blonde in Gilly crows out his own orgasm. The four of us just lay there for a bit panting the one in me going soft until there is clapping. We all look over to see John standing there clapping at us, smiling though not looking terribly happy. "Well now that you kids are done, I know some cops that are out of uniform on duty. Also Ms. Smith if you could get your self together for a minute I would appreciate you opening this door, SWAT is here, the area is cleared and a search warrant is on the way, we really gotta get to the basement and the hole." "Oh fine ruin the post sex cuddling. Though dang you are right I want to get back in that basement, I found what I think was a package of crack and there were boxes more. I do hope you got some officers into the basement to keep it from being cleared." I say as I grab up my panties and slide them up my legs. Gilly just lies where she was put by the blonde ear to ear smile on her lips. I reach down and give her a little nudge to make sure she is alive. She twitches then looks over at me, her smile getting wider if possible. The blonde cop hands her clothes and helps her sit up. I look away when John clears his throat to look at him he is waving toward the door. Rolling my eyes I straighten out my top and walk over to the keypad besides the door. "Listen I know you are really hands on with getting rid of scum but I think it's better if you let us take care of your basement. Defense attorneys would have a field day with asking us to prove you didn't put that stuff there." John says as I am entering in the code. "Well darn it is my house and I would really like to know but alright unless things go really bad I'll stay out of it. Gives Gilly and I free time so we can raid my room and pack up. Maybe borrow your car and go makeup shopping, all I got left is the cheap stuff the prison gave me." The door opens and the three cops exit quickly, Gilly walks up besides me and John looks out the door then turns back to us. "Catchada be careful, I'm not really sure who in the cops we can trust. If at all possible don't go anywhere alone with any but me. Gilly don't worry your new boyfriend is a cousins kid she's been after me to help him find a girlfriend. I'm not sure how well you would like him besides for sex but he seems a good enough kid. Oh and sorry my car probably isn't going anywhere for a while, the Uzi did a number on it. I can radio in another car for you, though your friend did show up, patrol is babysitting him." Gilly turns at least eight shades of red as John leaves. I grab her hand and take her to my room, shutting the door after. With the practiced ease of someone who has lived in a room I go through the drawers and closet, Gilly sitting on my bed and looking around. "God I can't believe I had sex, he was really good and all but dang I don't think I've had enough yet." She says staring at the posters on my walls. "You and me both, now before you say I had two it's been a decade, takes more than two dicks to get rid of the itch. Anyway come on help me pack so we can get out of here and get some more dicks, after we go shopping I really gotta get different colors and better makeup." Pulling my luggage out of the closet she gets up and helps me, as I pull clothes out of the closet she grabs lingerie, bra's, and panties out of my drawers. In no time we have packed all of my clothes and a couple of toys, which make me turn red again, thinking about the times I would lay in bed with one pumping it in and out to orgasm after orgasm, all the while with a camera in my room. This thought sparks another and I dash out of my room into my brothers. I look about at the basic untidiness, the normal yuck reaction gone, instead I just miss him. Gritting my teeth I go through the room, pulling stuff out of the way, lifting others until I have gone through everything besides the closet. The closet is where I find it a VCR wired into a cable coming out of the wall, a socket high up on the wall providing the power. No sign of any tapes on the shelf with the VCR and no higher ones I check the floor of the closet and find a floor safe. It is not bolted to the floor so I try and pick it up, it's lighter than it looks luckily so I manage to walk it into my bedroom and plop it on my bed. Gilly looks at the safe, then at me and opens her mouth to say something but a knock at the door attracts both of our attention. The blonde cop is back and smiling at Gilly but looks to me and opens his mouth. "I am assigned to be your escort and guide to find your friend, so if you two ladies are ready I can show you to him now." "Oh yes that would be lovely, could you perhaps lug this safe for us? I have a number of bags to get and the safe would make for a two tripper." I tell him smiling brightly as I pick up the safe and hand it to him. "Of course though I was also asked if perhaps there is a recording of your cameras in the house somewhere, it would make for an easier time of proving that you had no part in placing drugs in your basement." "Well yes maybe hang on I didn't check the VCR, it is possible perhaps that some things were recorded. Not likely I suppose since the tape hasn't been replaced in two years, but hang on let me get it." I say as I dart out the door. In seconds I am back with a tape in hand only half played through. Placing it atop the safe I grab up my luggage, Gilly taking two bags before we usher him out the door and down the stairs ahead of us. "You know, I don't even know your name, I suppose it is good we haven't knocked boots." I mention about halfway down the steps, Gilly next to me looking a little curious herself "Oh my I would shake your hand but I would rather not drop this safe. I am Bart pleased to make your acquaintance Ms. Smith and Ms. Stevens." He says as he stops at the foot of the steps allowing us to go out the door first. "Such manners, most pleasurable to make your acquaintance Bart, though I think Gilly had more pleasure in making it than I did." I say making Gilly turn at least thirty shades of red. "Oh no that pleasure was definitely mutual, now if you two ladies would be so kind as to turn right your friend is about a block straight ahead." "Ah good, at least we aren't walking a terribly long way. So Gilly if you decide to keep him, do make sure he loses the spiked hair, named Bart with blonde spike hair is a little too cartoonish." "I'm not sure I will keep him, however I agree. I think perhaps a little longer parted to the right would be nice. Though I don't know, he should look pretty good shaved as well, what do you think?" She replies nudging me with her elbow and winking. "Well if we want to grow his hair longer why not go all the way and let it grow as long as it will grow then perming it. I would think a nice Shirley Temple look would work for him. Heck we can even go all out and buy him a nice deep red or purple makeup set, I mean why not get him all gorgeous." "Oh well if we are talking makeup on him let's really go all out and Goth him. White face with black lipstick and eyeliner, paint his nails and hair black, perhaps give him The Crow look, I always thought that Brandon Lee was extra hot like that." "Damnit no, you are not putting makeup on me, I am not going for a Shirley Temple hair, I might consider the office hair but I am not going shaved either." Bart finally snaps out making us both laugh. "OK, but you are letting us do you how we want for Halloween." I tell him after dropping a bag and poking my finger into his chest. "All right but I'm not growing my hair long and nothing permanent, your friend is right over there by the way." Picking up my bag again I turn and dash across the street dropping them again to leap into his arms. Frank groans with the impact but wraps his arms around me to hold me up and plants a wet kiss on my nose. "It's really good to see you again, though I thought prisons had better fitness programs." He says with a grin and a fake groan as he puts me on the ground again. "Hey nobody can call me fat." I snap and hit him in the arm. ""Ouch OK, OK your not fat I'm just getting old." He grins out as he rubs his arm. "So are you still with Denise or did you find a younger model?" He just holds up his hand with a thick platinum ring on his ring finger. I look from the ring to his face and back a few times, the huge grin on his face telling me it is what it looks like. "You are a total asshole you know that, I was supposed to be the maid of honor." "Your brother was the best man and we videotaped it, don't worry it was a boring old wedding, no stripper poles, no orgies just a lot of flowers and standing around." "I want the same thing you know, well maybe with an orgy. I'd want stripper poles but I don't think I could resist them." "If you two could pause with the stripper pole weddings an introduction would be nice." Gilly says at my shoulder looking somewhat perturbed at our discussion, Bart standing behind her grinning. "Oh right sorry, Frank here is my best friend, closer to brother really, if you forget about my initiation at least. Frank this is Gillian Stevens my parole officer or god as she put it, and this is Bart our friendly neighborhood cop and proud owner of Gillys virginity." "Stripper pole wedding, I don't know that sounds nice. Wait...what? Virginity really, I never noticed a hymen." "Bart that is because they make toys for us women that make hymens history, so I do have to ask what about your initiation are we supposed to forget?" Gilly asks as she pokes him in the ribs. "Oh right, that... well...you see..." I couldn't help but trail off, the whole thing is somewhere in weird land. "For her initiation we banged her, I was the first one. Took forever because she was just one of the guys to me, she still managed to take on another nine guys after that, kept crying for more until the last one. I think she walked bowlegged for two days after but lord was that a legend told over and over again after." "Oh all right if you are going to tell it you should get it right, it was twelve guys after you. Though really legend and it's still told?" "Of course, go into any bar, club or men's room and you can find either the poem scrawled into the wall or people who know the story. So what is the deal with the safe?" "My god, I'm not sure I like that thought, but then again I suppose I won't need much application filling to find a job. The safe Bart is lugging for us like a dear? Oh that I found in my brothers closet, along with a VCR, hooked up to a camera in my room. We are going to get it cracked and see what is inside. So where is your car?" "Did you go blind in prison or something it is right behind me." "That isn't your car that is a station wagon, wait don't tell me you got busy and had kids." "Well we are getting busy as often as possible but not yet. Anyway hop on in I am sure I have a shopping trip to take you on and we gotta find a safe cracker." "OK, though something you gotta know first, Gilly here is coming with, she's got it from on high to find one of my hang out spots, and I got a place to stay already, you probably know her, reporter friend of my brothers." "Well since she is your god, I can't hold a religion back, probably not a winning fight anyway fine. Are you sure you want to trust that reporter though, she left a lot of messages while he was alive. I don't know how he handled it." "I'll explain it later let's get my stuff in the back, Bart do you happen to know of any good safe crackers by chance?" I say as I move around to the back of the station wagon and toss my luggage in. "Well yes as a matter of fact I do, there is one in the complex next to the station. It's only a couple miles from here. We use him to open locked things of all sorts at murder scenes." "Great thanks Bart you can go back on duty now. It was a pleasure meeting you and I can't wait for Halloween." Bart steps away from the station wagon and waves as we pull away turn around and head towards the police station, Gilly waves back and blows a kiss as we pass him. Frank glances over at me a few times as he navigates the streets before finally asking as we find the complex with the safe cracker. "So come on out with it why are you staying with the reporter. Just because your brother liked her doesn't mean you have to put up with her. Denise had me clean out the spare bedroom for you." "Oh my, if I didn't know better I would think you were coming on to me. If you must know my brother liked her so well he had unprotected sex with her at least twice, I have two nephews and a niece." I tell him as I pull the safe out of the back. I walk into the store before anyone says anything and get instant attention from a rather handsome man with graying temples. He pulls out a section of carpet from behind the counter and places it atop the counter motioning me to place the safe atop it. "Now Ms. I must ask you a couple of things, namely where did you get this safe and is it yours or someone else owns? If someone else owns I need a court ordered permission or the owner's permission to open. If you own I can get this open in a couple hours." He says smiling down at me from his somewhat daunting height. "Well it came from my house, and I guess I own it now, my brother owned it but he's been dead for two years. Before you ask I was in prison when he died, I didn't even know he had a safe, I found it looking through his room." "Ah of course, that must mean you are Catchada Smith. I shall crack this safe for you and I will even leave it closed until you return so you won't have to wonder if that is really all that was inside." "Well that sounds nice, I have no idea what is inside, I am sure there are some videotapes but otherwise for all I know there is a cure for cancer in there." "Oh well in that case I better get this open. Come back anytime this afternoon and I should have it opened for you." "Great, how much is this going to cost me and do I pay now or after you get it opened?" "Well in this case the police department is paying me to open this for you, Detective John McDonald called maybe three minutes ago saying to expect you and that I am to charge the department." "Oh great leaves me more for makeup, and maybe some new clothes. So I shall be back later and hopefully you will have some surprises for me." "I am sure I will." He says as he picks up the safe and heads into the back with it. With a smile I walk back out and get back into the station wagon, Gilly and Frank barely notice me sit down they are talking baseball and who is going to the World Series. As they take a pause in debating over whether the Yankee's are going to go again or not I clap my hands and whistle. Call Me Booty "I am done here for a couple hours, I am in desperate need of new makeup and well look I'm in a car with a driver so let's go shopping. I believe a mall run is in order, at least I hope they still have a puncturing place. There are still some good places for makeup and I suppose some new clothes." "Well I hope price isn't an issue, the old mall closed there is a new one up and it's more expensive." Frank says to me as he starts the car up. "Oh no problems, I got enough we can hit up the mall wander around for a little while pick up makeup and some clothes for me and stop for something good to eat." "If you want good to eat at the mall they got a wood fired pizza place." Gilly says as she leans over the back of my seat. "They got weird stuff for the pizza though, zucchini and spinach pizza, I mean it's just really weird." Frank says making a face. "That isn't all they have, they do make regular old sausage and pepperoni pizza." "You know Frank you always said Thai food is weird until you tried some." "Yeah, didn't help you talked about some of the stuff you can find in Thai food before I got some, I mean dang did you have to talk about bugs in your food then hand me some." He says as he reaches over and tickles me. "Yes I did, if I hadn't you wouldn't have liked it as much, so there and you are so going to try the weird stuff pizza with us. We will hand you enough bags and boxes that you will be hungry trust me." "You can't get that much stuff, dang you said a couple hours not two weeks." Gilly and I look at each other then burst out laughing, nothing else is said until we get to the mall. I couldn't help but just stare out the window, it's huge. This tall building, maybe three stories extends about half a mile in both directions away from the middle, sandstone colored with hanging banners and flags sticking out here and there. The entrance is this huge metal affair, looking rather like a small pebble up against a big rock. There are signs at the entrance, and what looks to be one of those diode message boards blinking on and off before scrolling a message. We park fairly close to the entrance, I almost express my surprise at the location we park at until I remember today is Wednesday. As we walk to the entrance of the mall they again talk baseball and I can't help but stare at this incredibly large mall. Inside however is where the biggest shock is the mall is actually four stories, the lowest story is under the ground. Frank disappears for a few moments while Gilly and I look at the map and try to decide on where to go first. Finally I remind her I'm the one buying anything, she's still working. As she looks at me a little crossly I look around for Frank and spot him sitting in a golf cart. "Oh Lord Frank did you branch out into golf cart theft?" "Hey that hurts, you should know I only steal hearts, the carts are a feature of the mall, it's so freaking big they decided to offer carts for those who can't walk far enough or harried guys who have two buy mad girls to follow around." He says trying hard to look hurt. "Hmmm, I think I am starting to like this mall, so you get to be James now and well we have decided you are taking us to Dillard's first. Then we are going to the leather store, I gotta replace a few things and buy more." "I don't remember seeing any leather in your room or packed." Gilly says as we sit on the cart. "That is because Denise took them all she really loved my taste in leather and was forever borrowing them anyway. I gave them to her when I was sent to prison." When we finally reach Dillard's Frank stays in the cart, Gilly and I walk into the store weaving our way through the jewelry men's clothes and basic here look stuff left out for people to buy on a whim. Making our way up one level we find the women's clothes and makeup sections. Before heading for the makeup I wander through the clothes picking out a few things, new lingerie g string panties a dress here and there. Reaching the makeup my arms full I don't see who is there until I put the clothes down and scream in surprise. I am joined by the clerk behind the counter who promptly jumps over and wraps me up in a bear hug. "My goodness Nancy you look great, Frank never said you were working here. How have you been and all that stuff I'm supposed to ask but can't think of at the moment." I grunt out from between her arms. "I haven't spoken to any of the old crew in forever. My parents moved a year after you went to prison and I just got back in town like 3 months ago. Of course before my ass gets fired did you want to see any of the makeup or just make a purchase?" "Wouldn't want you to get fired, Gilly here may decide to toss me back in prison. I wish to make purchases, lots of them. I do hope you get commission because I'm spending a lot. Oh yeah before you ask Gilly here is my parole officer, she's following me around today to get all my secrets and get some sex." I say poking Gilly in the ribs, she turns red and Nancy laughs. "Of course, now do you have any specific colors or companies in mind, I could make recommendations if you wish or you can simply point out the ones you want." "Oh I want the spiel, I haven't seen makeup in ten years and I'm not real sure what is good and what is not. I'm not sure I want recommendations you weren't the best with makeup, I would like you to tell me what each brand does and doesn't do however." "Hey I was too good with makeup, you just never saw me before the guys descended on me and messed it all up. Anyway, let's talk foundation, would you like an oil, powder or liquid foundation?" "I don't do foundation, you should know that. All I need is some blush, eyeliner, and lipstick." "I know I know I was hoping you would buy more. Anyway yes lipstick, I have a lot of lipsticks, they were very good at improving lipsticks. There are all kinds, I've got metallic and SPF lipsticks, but for my money the only one you really want is Revlon Colorstay Ultimate. It comes in to be honest a small array of colors but all are beautiful and you would be hard pressed to not find one for any semi normal looks." She says pulling a rack of lipsticks over to the counter from behind her. "Oh my, these are lovely, and they sound perfect. Now if only they had a nice purple, though I think I'm going to take all of these besides the nude colors. I don't get those, if I wanted nude lips I'd not wear lipstick." "Ah yes you and purple, well never fear Revlon makes these Super Lustrous lipsticks, there are a lot of gorgeous colors in here and they are packed with vitamins C and E, they say your lips stay kissably conditioned." "These are great and I'll take a few of these, though I wanted a dark purple. Do you happen to have any dark purples back there?" "Of course, here we have the Colorganics Purple Haze it's sorta shiny dark purple. These particular ones are ninety five percent organic, as in no chemicals, well almost no chemicals they claim it is kiss proof. I've never tried this brand so I'm not real sure if they are or not but they sell well for the higher price. Entirely possible they sell well because of this whole organic trend so popular lately." "Yes well let's talk blush, I want a nice powder and a range of colors, I'm thinking with all the lipstick colors I have here I'm going to need a range of pinks reds and a light purple if possible." "Ah of course, we have a full range of powder blushes, I believe these and these and this one would be what you are looking for. I assume now you want eyeshadow yes?" "Of course, same range of colors, and then we should go, I need to visit the leather shop eat and get back to the safe cracker, my brother had a safe I want open and he said be back in a couple hours." "Alright then let me ring all of this up, going to take a while. Do you think you are going to be eating sooner than half an hour, I get lunch break in half an hour and I would really like to sit and talk to you and Frank, catch up on old times." She says as she rings up the myriad items I have grabbed in the store. "Probably longer, I gotta get new leather clothes, Denise took all of mine, and since much has probably changed it will take me a while to pick out replacements. Though yes I'd like that, and I'm sure Frank would as well, he always did stare at your butt." "He liked to do a little more than stare I swear he put more bruises on my butt than anyone. I suppose he's still with Denise though so I got no chance of sampling his equipment still." "Yep, he married her, they are even trying to have kids, he picked me up in a station wagon, floored me though at least he had enough room for us and my luggage, so you know small favors and all." "My god he doesn't have that corvette anymore? I mean seriously that man was fixated on that thing, but lord was it a spectacular car." "You know I'm not sure, I didn't even think to ask, but I seriously doubt it, it is probably in his garage or driveway. So dang that much, you didn't like double ring me a lot or something?" "I don't think so let me check. Nope, that is what you owe for all of this, pricey I know but for makeup we are one of the best places." "Do you have enough for that? I mean dang that is like 4 times as much as parolee's get on release." Gilly asks eyeing the numbers on the display. "Oh of course I have that, here use this card. Do you really think my brother wasn't making serious money or that I wouldn't end up with it, I mean think about it, we spent an hour in a panic room in my house, those things cost more than a lot of cars." "Well you have a point, I never thought about it I just assumed you would be broke being a parolee from prison." "OK I am jealous now, this is a third of my monthly pay from here and you're just paying for it without a care in the world." Nancy pipes in handing me my card back. "Dang you two are such killjoys, if you must know that is a little over half of what I have in that account, I do have three other checking though. I am going to get a job, gonna run over and see if I can get a job in one of those stripper joints on sixty fourth, I figure I'm going to empty at least one of the checking getting outfitted for it and food before I actually make money. Oh Nancy we are going to eat at the pizza place here in the mall, Gilly recommends it and Frank wasn't happy so it must be good." "Oh awesome I only ate there once so far. I'll tell the manager, after this big a sale he's going to pass out for a couple hours anyway. I'll get there in half an hour and order up some pizza, I know what you like and they take a while even when it's slow. Before I forget, Gilly is there anything you don't want or a specific pizza you have in mind?" "No I'll just have what you get I'm not all that particular on pizza I'm an easy to cook for gal." Gilly says as she picks up some of the many bags Nancy loaded with my purchases. After some goodbyes, a couple of hugs and a peck on the cheek we manage to exit the store to find Frank asleep on the cart. After we load the bags and us into the cart I hit him on the back of the head and off we go. The lazy bum was faking to avoid helping us load the cart, something I took great pleasure in poking into him before we reach the leather shop. I'm flabbergasted by the assortment here, a lot of the designs weren't even thought about the last time I had been in here. I grabbed so many things the salesclerk was joking that she is going to have to close the shop until they get more stuff in. When we finally left Frank had gone back to the entrance and gotten a trailer. All of the bags we had gotten before were loaded into the trailer and still only took up a third of the space. He of course was joking that he would have to go and get another trailer to fit all of the crazy bitch's bags, then spent the rest of the time staying as far away from me as he could. With everything in the trailer and Frank finally getting back in the cart we take off for pizza. At least we try, in a comedy of error's Frank goes the wrong way and we end up at the entrance. After we stop hitting him on the head we head off for the pizza finally making it to find Nancy sitting at the outermost table waving madly at us with pizza at the table. "I know you said you would be a while but dang that took forever. Was there a major sale or something on the way?" Nancy asks as she passes out plates and slices. "Nah, Frank went the wrong way and we ended up back at the entrance first after the leather store. I think he was scared of eating pizza with us, did they have the grasshoppers?" I tell her with a wink. "No sorry they did have mealworms though so I got it half right." Nancy replies watching Frank turn green with a smile on her face. "Ugh I know I said I was easy but dang I am not that easy." Gilly says putting the slice down. Nancy and I just start laughing, Nancy somehow managing to get out that there are no bugs in the pizza. Gilly laughs with us Frank just keeps looking green which makes us laugh harder. "So Nancy since you got dragged away for so long I am going to ask, I'm sure Frank is dying to know, how many kids have you had?" I ask eyeing Frank, he stops being green and turns pink instead, setting off even more laughter. "Well none actually, my mom got me on the pill soon as she found out I was having sex. I've not bothered to get off though I'm not having all that much sex lately anyway." "Stick around, she draws sex to her like a magnet, well sex and armed men with guns. I'm glad for the first one, second one I could so do without." Gilly says turning a little pink. "Hard to have excitement without armed men with guns, besides that is so not a normal occurrence for me." "Yes it is." Nancy and Frank say at almost the same time. "Jinx you both owe me a coke. It actually isn't, most of the time all that comes to me is horny guys. The guys today were a strange occurrence, not everyday you find out you have a basement in the house you grew up in believing there isn't one to find that it has been turned into a stockpile of drugs." "Well OK that is a strange occurrence, but you attract a lot of those. Nancy since you were kind enough to get the pizza why don't you go get some drinks to. So catty while we are asking sex questions, fess up how many women did you sleep with?" "None, though one of the guards kept offering, well more than one but the other one was greasy ugly and perverted. She kissed me as I was getting changed for release, I maybe am going to rethink that but no you can't watch." "Catty you go by that? I thought you only went by your full first name." Gilly interrupts Frank. "Well not really, I let Frank get away with it, and my brother would say it as well." "She hates it but most of us called her that behind her back. You see she growls as she fights, she even meows after putting somebody down." Nancy explains to Gilly as she puts the drinks in front of us. "Hey I do not meow what the hell are you talking about?" "Actually you do after a fashion your brother says it was you harnessing your Ki. You would growl low while fighting, when you land the last hit you stop growling for a second and then start it up again, sounds just like a little meow." "She wasn't doing that when she was shooting, according to Bart she didn't miss he didn't mention a growling." Gilly says leaning closer. "Shooting she holds her breath so can't growl you see, this is only when she is beating someone down." "Did that happen often?" Gillys face getting an interested look. "Six times, the first couple was shortly after she joined, then word spread and nobody wanted to, the other four she came upon a scuffle and they all ended very fast after that." "It was eight times actually, and I did miss at the house, eight bullets to take down six men. Before you ask, groups came after me twice when I was with my brother. Suppose that makes came after us but well they seemed more interested in taking me down, which gave my brother plenty of chances to take them down. I was only holding my own against them he was finishing them before anybody gets it in their head to claim I'm like some goddess of fighting or whatever. I'm only as good as the other guy let's me be." "Oh baloney you are like some goddess of fighting, you take on guys that are bigger and hold your own to wiping the floor with them. I've seen it, and based on what your brother said many times you are unmatchable. I think I should get hold of that fight director at the stadium and enter your name in that tournament coming up." "What tournament?" Gilly asks before I can get a word out. "There is going to be a mixed martial arts fight tournament in the stadium in two weeks. He would be drooling at the very idea of having catty here in his tournament, the ticket sales would shoot through the roof." "No, just no. I am not going to use my Muay Thai for gains beyond staying alive. Unless you can find a very strong reason that does not include money I will never do that." "I'm confused though there are Muay Thai tournaments in Thailand and elsewhere. Why can't you do that?" Gilly asks me her face scrunched up into a confused look. "Because they are not using their family Muay Thai, what you see those using is a bastardized version of Muay Thai. If anyone used their family style for any reason besides under attack to the death their family would have to hunt them down and kill them. It is a matter of honor to the ancestors that their style is not used for any purpose than what it was developed for. The stuff you can learn in a class or see on the tournaments is a weakened form of Muay Thai. Much like the samurai are supposed to have done it, we train and practice so we can take down an opponent in as few moves as possible. That is boring when you talk tournaments of whatever form." "Oh my, I never knew that. So I am curious now, how many moves did you use on those guys in the house?" "I used five moves to get them down the steps and disarm the one that lived." "Catty you are slipping I've seen you use two moves to accomplish a similar effect." Frank cuts in with a finger into my side. "I wanted a survivor, not that the cops gave me a chance to grill him." I get out between fits of laughter. "I don't know Ms. Smith, I rather get the impression you are a goddess of fighting." Gilly says grinning as Frank digs his finger in farther. "I'd love to stay and chat longer but I really gotta get back to work." Nancy says as she stands up purse hanging from her hand. "Here wait Nancy give me your phone number, Denise would love to have you over for barbeques and parties. Probably draft you into shopping trips as well, I've gotten good at bowing out of going on those." Frank says as he pulls his finger away from my side and gets a phone out of his pocket. "I am going to need a copy of her number Frank I'll pick up a cell phone later today." I say as I wave after Nancy. "Oh you don't have to, here this one is yours. Denise got it a couple days ago on our account for you, she was that excited." He says handing me the silver phone then pulling a black one out of his pocket. "Oh great saves me the hassle, so how much do I owe you per month?" "I better stay quiet on that one. Denise told me not to tell, you can talk to her about it if you really want, though I'm sure would be better to not make a fuss about it, especially since you are not going to stay with us." "I don't get it, why does she want Catchada staying with you two so much?" Gilly asks as she finishes off the last slice. "Because Denise met Frank through me, we were friends growing up and Frank was friends with my brother. Frank lived next door and Denise lived two streets over, I met her in school. In a way I played matchmaker between these two, he was getting on my nerves wanting a nice gal on his arm and I wasn't a girl to him."