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Tribal Unity

By: D_Lynn



This is my 2011 Nude Day Contest Entry. Please read, vote, and comment. Thanks.

*

It's not a storybook tale, exactly, even though it seemed to start out that way. We were young when we got married; right out of college. We had this fresh perspective on life, ready to make a difference, ready to settle down and raise children in the kind of loving, caring environment we just knew we were capable of providing. We were set. Rick had just secured a position at his Uncle's firm as a personal financial advisor and the world was full of possibilities for myself, a young woman with a graphics design degree.

What we didn't know then, what we learned the way everyone learns, is that the complexities of life can steer us off course in so many ways. In the span of a few very hard years, the dreams we thought were just at our fingertips, slipped so far from our grasp we didn't dare fantasize about them for fear of falling into depression. Ambitions of leaving our dead-end jobs to find opportunities to change the world vanished with the sinking economy, and the daily grind to produce, simply to stay employed, took its place in our outlook. I watched the man I thought was larger than life, the one I adored, turn sour and diminutive as stress became too burdensome to slough. And I could only add to his mental weight as my own drive to start a family became an obsessive quest, turning sex into nothing more than another chore that brought no pleasure and produced no offspring.

By our 5th wedding anniversary we were already considering divorce as a means of saving us both from slipping into delirium. We were mere shells of our own existence with no hope of recovering what he had, what we hoped for, and what we needed to be whole. It seemed hopeless and we were desperate.

But that's where the storybook tale ends and our life began.

****

Chapter One: Palm Trees and Sand

"I know it sounds a little hokey, Lori, but Steve told me that this couple from their church went and came back completely different."

"Yeah, but, were they...you know...considering..." Divorce. I couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence, to actually say the word out loud.

"Yes. They were even worse than us; fighting all the time, even in public places."

That might be better than this. At least they cared enough to argue. We just co-exist with no words left to say to one another. "How long would we be there?"

"Steve said they went for two weeks. You can go for just one, but two is recommended."

"Two weeks is my entire vacation for the year. I wouldn't be able to take any time off to see my family at Christmas."

"I know, Lori, but if we don't take this time...do something...we might as well just...I mean, I don't know what else to do. Nothing seems to be working. Counseling did absolutely nothing for us."

"No, I know, you don't have to recap all the failures again. We both know the score."

"I'm willing to try this...this one last thing."

"It's a lot of money, Rick."

"What difference does the money make now? I mean, we're just talking about dividing it up, anyway. At least we can say we did everything we could, no holds barred, to make it work."

Damn. He had to say that. I'd always considered myself a fighter; always talked about how people just quit things too soon, before they'd really tried. It was how I was raised and a big part of who I was, and it irritated me that in a small way, he was using that for his own argument. It would've really started a major argument, had it not been for the fact that he was using it to try and save our marriage. And I had to at least give him credit for that.

"Well, how much do you know about this special place that we're going to?"

"Steve didn't have many details. It's an island paradise, sort of. They just said that the less questions you ask in advance, the better. It's safe, it's disease-free, and the people are very friendly."

"It's not like some weird cult or anything, is it?"

"No, nothing like that. This couple still goes to their church and everything. They're completely normal except for the fact that they are blissfully married now, whereas before they were headed for disaster."

"Why no questions, then?"

"I don't know. At this point, I don't care. Call me desperate, if you want. Whatever. That's really what we are, isn't it? If it works, does it matter at this point?"

"No, no, it doesn't. You're right." I knew he was about to launch into another round of 'don't you even care about this marriage anymore', and I didn't think I could handle that argument. Again.

"The only advice Steve said they had, was to keep an open mind about everything, and try to accept the experience."

"Accept the experience? That sounds a little mysterious, doesn't it?"

"It does, but we're both pretty open-minded people. I don't think that sounds too hard or unreasonable. I know that there isn't any wife-swapping or drugs or strange religious practices involved. Steve says this couple is about as conservative as they come."

Part of me hated to go along with the idea. It wasn't because I didn't want to save our marriage deep down inside, it was because I had been at odds with Rick over everything for so long, it didn't feel right to agree with him. God, how messed up are we?

"Okay. Let's do it. At the very least, it will be a break from this place. It's an island, right? So there's palm trees and sand. How bad could that be?"

"Guaranteed palm trees and sand. We do have to go through a health screening and take some vaccines before we go."

"How come?"

"Apparently, this is a fairly secluded place and they have to safeguard against modern-world diseases. Their immune systems aren't prepared for the kinds of diseases we can carry."

"Wow! That sounds so, exotic."

"I know."

Rick made the arrangements, booked all the travel: two flights, ground transportation, boat, a second boat. It seemed like too much hassle, almost. It was going to take two days just to get there. We had a translator assigned to us and I was beginning to see the reason this trip cost an arm and a leg.

We learned that we would have our own bungalow and that made me relax a bit. I was watching for something odd like communal living quarters or hot coal walking or something like that, but couldn't find anything. There was nothing mentioned out of the ordinary. Nothing that would be worthy of the mystery surrounding this place.

The only thing that caused me the slightest concern was that we had to fly from Brisbane to Port Vila, Vanuatu which was very close to an active volcano. Close to one; not on one. And the island we were sailing to did not have an active volcano on it. So I kept my reservations to myself and happily went along with the plan. I even started to see it as an adventure of sorts and was looking forward to it. At least, the part about it being on a tropical island. Not so much the part about being with Rick.

They told us to pack light and I assumed that was so we wouldn't be bothered with so much luggage as we transferred from plane to plane to bus to boat to boat. Things being as they were, we would be packing our own suitcases and I didn't expect much handling assistance from Rick. As much as he was going to all this effort to save our marriage, I suspected his intentions were really to empty the bank account as much as possible before he stood a chance to lose it in court. I know it was an awful thought, but this was the same man who blamed me for his lacking sex drive. The same man who I suspected wanted to run off with the young girl down the street. He sure is friendly when she is walking her dog past the house.

And I already imagined just how annoying it was going to be to watch him gawking at every bikini that walked by our lounge chairs on the beach. I couldn't see how this could possibly help the state of affairs between us. What could possibly go on in this place that would change my mind at this point?

It's a stretch, really, to think that anything short of a lobotomy would make me forget all the hateful things he's said to me over the last year. And I've said my share, too, I know. But if he wants to do this to prove that he's trying, I'll go along with it.

As the departure day approached, I expected to get more details about the trip but got nothing. We were finally told that our translator would brief us on the last leg of our trip. It wouldn't be cost-effective for him to meet us any sooner than the last stop. It made sense, but it still rang of deceit in my mind. I would have brought it up to Rick so we could have one last argument over it, but I thought it would be much sweeter to let the whole thing fail in a bigger way. Wow, I really can be such a bitch sometimes.

****

Chapter Two: When In Rome...



We waited anxiously for our translator to arrive at the dock. The heat was stifling in the tiny structure that provided shade, even with the breeze coming off the ocean water. I tried not to let it affect my mood, but how could one not get cranky after hours of traveling in less than hospitable situations. I was tired, thirsty, and hot, hot, hot.

I think it added to my discomfort that I hadn't heard a language that was remotely familiar to my ears in hours. Had the captain of the boat not kept saying 'Temehiki' and shaking his head, I would have been certain we were in the wrong place. Temehiki was the name we were given for our island destination. It wasn't on any map that we could find and not in any internet search, either. If it weren't for the sweet Christian friends of our neighbors, Steve and Linda Landers, we wouldn't have believed this place even existed, much less was the certain cure for marital discord.

I stepped into the blistering sun for a few moments to look around. Nothing. Movement caught my attention and sent my heart racing wildly for a few seconds before I could make out what it was. A figure appeared out of the thicket. It was a woman. She had smooth, deep tan skin, with long, jet black hair cascading carelessly over her bare shoulders. I was so mesmerized by her flowing hair that it took me another second to realize she wasn't wearing a top of any kind. Oh, my...okay. And not wearing much below the waist, either. It was difficult not to stare as she approached. Her breasts were smaller, perky, with nipples that extended to tight points in the center. It was evident that she was young, maybe sixteen, I'd guess.

It caught me a bit off guard and I felt instantly guilty for even noticing her exposed body. Then she just smiled at me, her stark white teeth glowing in the afternoon sun, and waved in my direction before turning to walk down the beach. I was stunned by her openness. I was fully dressed, of course, and that didn't seem to bother her in the least. She felt no shame about being naked.

I watched her walk away until she was completely out of my view. I don't know why, exactly. There was something about her that just stuck with me. Her easiness; how content she seemed to be. Teenagers aren't content. I think the word 'teenager' actually means discontent.

I watched the boat we came in pull away from the dock and my heart jumped up to my throat. Just as I was about to bolt after it, Rick came out of the shelter.

"Christopher will be here within the half hour."

"How do you know that?" I looked out toward the ocean in a near panic. There was no sign of an incoming ship or boat, and the only way back was now dropping the throttle to embark on open water.

"Argus or Arliss or whatever his name was, managed to tell me with a lot of pointing at my watch and drawing pictures on the dirt floor."

"Oh, great. I wonder how the hell he knew, smoke signals? Because he sure as hell didn't get a phone call out here."

"I don't know. He was pretty certain about it, though."

"I hope so. I don't want to still be here when it gets dark."

"No, me either. It doesn't look like anyone even lives on this island."

"I saw a young woman a few minutes ago. She came out of those woods and walked down the beach there. I lost track of her when she rounded that corner."

"Well, that's good news. Means there's life here, anyway."

"Yeah, well not very civilized life. She wasn't wearing a thing."

"Nothing?"

"I don't think so. I didn't want to stare, so I couldn't tell for sure. You want to go after her and see for yourself?"

"No. Why would you say that?"

"I don't know. It's just...no reason."

"I didn't plan this trip so I could get a glimpse of the naked native women. Seriously, _Lori. What goes through your head sometimes..."

"Don't start, Rick, I swear. Not now, when we're in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by people who don't speak English."

"Okay, okay. Don't worry, it'll be alright."

Our conversation was interrupted by the faint sound of a motor and the unmistakeable slapping of water against the side of a boat.

"I bet this is him now."

We busied ourselves lining our luggage along the shoreline as a young boy tethered the boat to the dock. A tall gentleman, with curly blonde hair and deep blue eyes spoke to the boy in clipped, unfamiliar phrases. He was well tanned with leathery skin, no doubt from years of tropical sun exposure. The deep lines on his face grew more pronounced as he smiled in our direction.

"You're the Connell's, Ah presume?"

"Yes, sir." Rick answered smartly.

The gentleman simply chuckled at him, "It's sort of a joke. No one uses this dock but me. Ah'm Christopher Manning. Ah'll be your translatah while yer in the village."

"Nice to meet you. I'm Rick and this is my wife, Lori."

"Nice to meet you," I chimed in.

"Thank you. Ah've brought some watah; gonna take a bit-a-time to go ovah the local customs."

"How much longer until we get there?" I needed to know the itinerary.

"Depends, really." I placed his accent as Australian in origin.

"On what?"

"On 'ow quickly you can get ou' of those nickas."

"Out of these?" I grabbed my t-shirt in my hands. "What do you mean?"

"Yer expected to live like the na'ives in this village and thay don't wear a stitch. Ah just strapped this 'ere tog on for the trip; so Ah wouldn't scare ya."

"You're kidding, right?" I gawked at Christopher and then turned toward Rick who was not saying a word. "Did you know about this?"

"No, I told you everything I knew." I would have thought he was in on it if his face hadn't turned three shades of red by my accusation. He was telling the truth; he didn't know.

"See, this is why it takes so bloody long to shove off. Ah can tell ya the rest on the way but Ah 'ave to be sure that by the time we dock, yer naked as the day you were born or Janu will just drive us off. And believe me, there isn't anywhere else to go."

"What about here?"

"Can't stay 'ere, neither. Unless you 'appen to be carryin' a shitload of local currency."

We don't even know what the local currency is. Rick shook his head.

"Okay, then. Ah guess we'll set an' 'ave story time."

Christopher strode past us to the minuscule building and plopped down in the doorway, setting down the water jug as he did so. We clamored up the incline after him.

Rick spoke first, "Look, I think there's been a mistake. We weren't looking for some kind of nudist colony thing, or whatever. No one told us that we'd have to go without clothes."

"Nah, if we'd told ya, ya would'na come, now would ya? Ya aren't the first couple spoutin' at me. Ah know why yer 'ere and Ah know bein' in the nick is the last thing you think ya need. But it's the way it is 'ere. This isn't a...what did you call it...a nudist colony thing. It's the way we live; the way the Hiki's 'ave always lived."

"But it's not the way we live. You understand; You haven't always lived there."

"No, Ah 'aven't; sorry to say. But Ah do now. Listen, no couple has evah walked on that island with so much as a stitch on the'r back and that's not changing today. Now, we can talk about yer options but it'll be a short chat. The next boat back to the big island won't be 'ere for another week."

"What about the boat you came in?"

"That boat is going to Temehiki. With or without ya on it. Ah'd rather ya ride along so my conscious stays clear, but it's yer choice."

Rick sat down next to the water jug and opened it. He reached up toward me and gently pulled on my hand as a gesture for me to sit. Then he handed me the open jug. I gathered it was his peace offering.

While I took my first sip of water, Rick spoke. "So, tell me how this whole operation started."

"Ah, yeah. One winter, Ah think it was...can't remember the ye'ah, there was this young couple avin' a real blue, ya know, ahgument, outside the booza on the big island. It was a beau'y. My mate, Roger leans o'er and says to me, Ah remember it like it was yesterday, 'Ah bet they couldn't stay mad like that on your isle.' And Ah knew he was right. That got me thinkin'...Ah could start a business of it. Never run out of unhappy couples. Not in this lifetime, eh?"

He chuckled for a few seconds and looked to us to join in, but then quickly realized that the joke was on us. We were one of those unhappy couples he was referring to.

"Anyway, it started out as sort of me own exper'ment and then people started flappin' their gums..." His voice trailed off and it was clear he was finished telling the story he'd probably recanted a thousand times over.

"How does it work, exactly? I mean, how does being in that village change things for these couples?"

Christopher shrugged, "Ah don't know. Ah'm not a 'ead doctor. It just works. Ever' time."

"Every time?"

"Yup."

"You're saying that every couple that has gone to that island is now living happily ever after?"

"All I know is that when they step off the boat, they'd rather die than look at the other one. And when they leave, they can't keep the'r 'ands off each other. What they do af'er that is up to them."

"Anyone come back?"

"A few. Mostly to jus' vacation."

"So, there are palm trees and everything?"

"Yeah, Ah guess."

"And beach and ocean and sun."

"Yeah."

Rick turned toward me and shrugged his shoulders. There really wasn't anything else we could do. Despite the fact that I was irritated by the rude surprise, I was also hungry and tired, and ready to start a vacation. I shook my head and shrugged my shoulders.

"You know what they say, when in Rome..."

****

Chapter Three: Small Favors



We found out what the little shack next to the dock was for, after all. It was there to keep our suitcases dry in case it rained. There wasn't enough room in the boat to take them, and there wasn't a need anyway, with no clothing allowed. Christopher assured us that every visitor before us had done the exact same thing, and that the locals had absolutely no use for clothes. We did keep our passports and money and all our jewelry just in case, but I think that was more to make us feel better. I got the impression that the young girl I had seen was a rare sight on that part of the island.

It was a very strange feeling taking clothing off on that shore. Every nook where sweat pooled underneath my cotton tee and shorts, now cooled with the slightest breeze off the ocean. I turned my back to the men in my last display of modesty as I dropped my shorts to my feet and quickly stepped out of my panties. Rick kept his distance, not knowing just how explosive I might be.

In truth, I wasn't as angry about it as I thought I'd be. I mean, we sort of knew something was up from the very beginning. If this was the worst part, well, what was the big deal? People go to couples-only resorts all the time with nude beaches. And this wasn't our first foray into being exposed out in the open. We honeymooned in the Dominican Republic and I went topless one of the days. And then we went swimming off to the side by ourselves and...Oh, God, we did do it in the ocean, I remember. It doesn't even feel like that was us, now. More like some other couple we watched from our loungers on the beach. That whole time in our lives feels like nothing more than a dream now.


Tribal Unity



I tried to look casual, holding one arm across the front of me with my makeup bag in hand in front of my pelvic area, while my other hand rested on my shoulder so that my arm draped across most of my chest. I'm sure I wasn't fooling anyone. I was uncomfortable. I maintained pace behind Rick down the embankment to the boat. He turned to assist me into the vessel and I gasped when I saw his full frontal nakedness for the first time. It had been weeks, maybe even months since I'd seen him nude. It was our morning routine to use the sink and facilities and then get dressed, at slightly different times. There wasn't much opportunity for us to happen on each other by accident; and since sex had run its course for us, not much reason to be naked on purpose, either.

I instantly felt guilty. My tiny outburst painted Rick's face a deep crimson. He lowered his eyes and supported my elbow with his hand without so much as looking at my torso. A part of me understood it was out of respect, but another part of me, the vulnerable part that I try to hide, was afraid it was because he didn't find me attractive anymore.

Almost as soon as I sat down in the tiny craft, a chill swept over my frame and settled into my bones. I wanted to believe it was due to the ocean breeze and setting sun, but the temperature was still hovering in the eighties, maybe even higher. It wasn't the tepid air; it was sheer nervousness. Riding those waves, bare ass bouncing on the vinyl cushion beneath me, steady wind across my skin and occasional spray over the side as the boat picked up speed, I realized just how vulnerable I was. Nearly all my shields were gone. I didn't have clothing to protect me from the elements; I didn't have mom and dad to stand over me; I didn't have words of reason that anyone in this place would understand without Christopher's assistance, if he even planned on sticking around. There was only Rick. And a tiny nagging thought occurred to me just then. Do I even have him, anymore?

For the first time since we began fighting, it dawned on me what it was going to feel like without him. I hadn't really tried to imagine life without him as much as I just wanted to run away from the life we were living. There was a difference. I was so focused on what I was running away from, I forgot to think about where I was heading. And that might be a lonely place without him.

It seems ludicrous that such a simple thing like stripping off my clothing in a foreign land could force such a realization. It's not like I had profoundly changed my mind about everything in that moment, but it got me thinking. It made me want to look harder at alternatives to divorce.

The young boy driving the boat, Rafin, cut the motor and jumped over the side a few feet from shore so he could guide the vessel up onto the beach. The sun was rapidly setting on the horizon, throwing brilliant shades of pink and purple across the sand, but I was too focused on my own nakedness to take much notice of anything around us. As if to prove I wasn't as vulnerable as I felt inside, I scrambled out of the craft without assistance to follow our guide to our assigned quarters. My eyes never left the ground until we were standing inside the space we would be sleeping in for the next week or two.

Up until this time, we had been referring to our room as a bungalow. That was somewhat of a misnomer. It was more like a one-room hut. There was one bed, one sink, one toilet, and one nightstand; no interior walls. Not a single hope for privacy. My eyes darted wildly from left to right, up, down, trying to grasp how on earth I would survive this.

"We chatted past suppertime. I'll go round yer up some fruit. It'll have to do ya 'til mornin'."

"Is the water drinkable?"

"Oh, yeah. There should be a glass un'er the sink. Everythin' ya need."

'Everythin' ya need', are you kidding me? This is like camping. It dawned on me that there was no electricity, and no shower! I turned toward the doorway to ask, but Christopher had already stepped out. Beside the door, there was a large opening to the hut, like a rectangular window but without glass. I walked up to it so that the lower half of the wall covered my body and peeked my head out the opening. Dim lighting shone from a few of the other huts and I turned and noticed that Rick was striking a match to light the candle lying on the nightstand.

No one seemed to notice our presence, or they simply didn't care. They certainly weren't scrambling over to welcome us to their village, like I expected. I thought they told us the people were friendly. Not so friendly by my standards.

I realized that I must look like a little child with my hands gripping the rim of the window, peeking out over the edge. I released the sill and stepped backward to sit on the end of the bed. Rick leaned around the doorway, checking out the layout of the tiny village left and right. It was quiet. I listened to the clucking sounds of the tribal dialect from huts next to ours and much farther down, several huts away. There weren't many secrets in this place.

"The villagers are retiring. I see a lot of candles going dim. Everyone has their window open." Rick whispered his report even though we had been assured that no one in this place spoke English except for Christopher. It didn't feel right to speak in a normal tone, even if they couldn't tell what we were saying.

"I don't know about this, Rick. No one has even come to see what we look like. This feels odd."

"Here comes Christopher."

"Ah brought ya a mango, a banana, and a guava." Christopher spoke at a normal volume, making it seem like he was shouting.

"Thanks," Rick managed to utter at a volume barely louder than a whisper.

"No pro'lem. If we'd left soona, ya would'a made dinna and met the people. But something you'll realize righ' away is that no one waits around 'ere."

"Why the rush?"

"There's no rushing; but no waitin', neither. If you can't make up your mind to do somethin', the opportunity passes, it doesn't wait for ya. Time to hit the sack. Things start early 'round 'ere."

"How will we know when to start?"

"You'll 'ear yer neighbors, especially the li'l ones. They don't 'ave a volume control, like we do."

"Where do we go?"

"Just follow the crowd. Ever'one eats in one place. G'nite mates. See ya at breakfast."

I sat frozen for a couple of seconds after he left, not really knowing what to do or say. I remembered after he was gone that I'd forgotten to ask about bathing. Surely these people bathe, right?

We crawled into bed after dropping the cover to our window and swinging our thatch door closed. None of the other huts were closed up like ours but we didn't bother ourselves with the reasons why. I wanted privacy and I didn't care the price at that point. I managed to use the toilet after Rick extinguished the candle. The act didn't create as much sound as I thought it would and I was immensely thankful for that small favor.

****

Chapter Four: Paw-Pui



Just keep running; don't look back. The urge to peer over my shoulder as I fled was too great to resist. I could hear it behind me. My bare foot caught on a stray root growing just under the sand and I faltered, grasping at the vines whipping against my sides. No, no, I can't fall now. I felt another vine underfoot just as I was regaining my balance and sucked in breath to scream...

My heart pounded hard against my chest cavity as I returned to reality. Reality. This is no more real than my dream. I felt something at my feet and realized that the vines of my dream were only Rick's feet entangled with mine in this bed that was probably half the size of our spacious California king at home.

The air in the hut was stifling. Still. Hot. Musky. I sucked hard to pull much needed fresh air into my lungs. It was no use. There was none to be had. That must be why they all sleep with the windows and doors open.

I disentangled my feet from Rick's and rolled onto my back. I could hear faint noises outside. I felt a catch in my throat as I vaguely recalled the nightmare I was having just before I woke. These sounds were human, though. Not whatever thing was chasing me through the tropical jungle. These were the sounds of restless movement just before rising out of bed, the scuffling of feet, tiny murmurs of morning greeting. My breathing turned shallow so that I might take in every noise. There was something comforting and familiar about it. It reminded me of being at home as a child and waking up to the sounds of my mother and father in the kitchen whispering quietly over their morning coffee. Coffee. I suppose there is no chance I'll get any of that here.

Rick straightened his long legs and rolled onto his back. His wide shoulder rested against mine and I suppressed the urge to move away. It wasn't because I was just that opposed to touching him, but because it was hot, and touching only made it feel hotter.

"It's hot in here," Rick groaned as he wiped the beads of sweat from his brow. "I need to open that window..."

"Wait! Before you do, let me use the toilet first. I don't think I can do that with the window open."

"Okay."

I swung my feet over the edge and scuffled sideways around the cramped space until I reached the commode. The hut was pretty dark without the window and door open, so I bent at the waist to try and peer into the space I was about to lower my bare bottom onto.

"What are you looking for?"

In my sleepy state, I had somehow forgotten that I wasn't alone. Five years of being married and I could count on one hand how many times I'd peed in front of him. But now, I had bigger worries than modesty.

"I don't know. Tarantulas, scorpions, snakes, lizards, large insects of any kind, piranhas, eels, sharks."

"You really think there's a shark in there?"

I released the air I was holding in my lungs in anticipation of finding an unsavory creature, and chuckled. Rick's quiet guffaw joined my own in a chorus of laughter. I realized that it was the first time we had laughed together in...I don't know how long.

"No, I guess not." I spun and sat down, satisfied that nothing was going to bother my exposed backside. I was a bit uncomfortable, still. The release of laughter helped but it didn't remove my inhibitions, entirely. Rick must've sensed my discomfort and rescued me with idle chatter.

"I'm surprised that we even have a toilet and running water. I don't think any of the other huts have it. At least, I haven't heard water running. And I'm curious if the villagers sleep on a mattress like this or if they just crash on the floor. Or ground, rather. Still, it'd probably be cooler there. Maybe not more comfortable, but slightly more room."

"Yeah, I had this dream I was tripping on something. I think because our feet were all tangled together."

I had finished my business while Rick was pontificating on the local comforts. I was certain that later in the morning, I would have to visit the spot again and prayed that Rick would be elsewhere. I stood and paused for a brief moment. It felt strange not having any clothing to pull up, refasten, whatever. I walked to the sink to brush my teeth and allow Rick his moment on the toilet. I snuck a quick peek behind me to see if he was sitting or standing. Sitting. Interesting. Wonder if that's out of modesty or politeness. Doesn't matter, I guess.

Chatter from outside the hut was becoming louder and more animated. The rhythm of my heartbeat accelerated a notch in anticipation of the unknown. Rick lifted the thatch covering over the window and observed the activity while I stood awkwardly at the sink.

"Looks like people are heading to breakfast. I can't see where they're ending up, but they're heading that way. Ready to join the crowd?"

I swallowed hard and nodded. Rick remembered he needed to brush his teeth, and that gave me a few more seconds to settle my now thrumming heart. It wasn't long enough, but I suspected nothing short of facing my fear would slow it down.

Rick opened the door and stood in the passageway for several seconds with me behind him. I'm not sure if he did it on purpose or not, but it helped me muster up some courage. It could just as easily have been his own way of gathering strength, or him just soaking in the surroundings. At any rate, I was thankful he did it.

The hard ground underneath my bare feet was already warm from the sun. I briefly wondered how difficult it was going to be to walk outside in the afternoon. As it was, I had enough trouble just trying to get over how sensitive the bottoms of my feet were to every little rock, stone and stick. I hopped over one stone to quickly realize how bad that choice was for braless and exposed breasts. Glancing over at Rick, he suffered a similar problem when he walked, but I gathered that he was far less bothered by it than I was.

The general attitude of the crowd was pleasant. Content. Just like the girl I saw yesterday. Peaceful; easy. A woman caught my eye as I was lost in thought about how to describe what I was observing. She opened up with a smile that spanned her entire face, bringing me back to the present time. As if I spoke fluent Hiki, she spoke to me as she approached. An uncomfortable smile stretched my lips and color rushed to my cheeks. I gathered she was doing nothing more than welcoming us, though, so I nodded and patted the hand that had come to rest so easily on my arm.

She continued to hold onto me, talking up a storm as we walked to the dining area. Her fingers stroked the hair on my arm as if I were a kitten. Her soft, exposed skin brushed against my side as we moved and I would have felt embarrassed by it all, by the sheer intimacy of it, had she not held me captive by her warm, friendly smile. My left hand reached out to Rick's and he intertwined his fingers with mine to reassure me. And then I took my first real breath since leaving the hut.

The dining area was buzzing with activity. Lively conversations, laughter, hustled movements. It wasn't leisure social time; you got a real sense that there was a purpose to being here, and it would be served efficiently, without undue delay. Christopher nodded to us from across the room and swiftly headed in our direction. My new friend disengaged herself from my arm and I waved as she moved purposefully toward the open fire stove.

Several glances in our direction provided one important social detail to me: There were few rules of etiquette when it came to eye contact. No amount of staring seemed to be inappropriate and no part of the body was off-limits to blatant ogling. It was a bit unnerving at first, and even more difficult, I discovered, to reciprocate. I couldn't seem to bring myself to overcome my own sense of propriety about scanning the nude bodies in front of me. It was interesting and a source of pondering in my own mind. I seemed to have fewer qualms about being looked at, than looking myself. Hmmmm...that's odd, isn't it?

"G'mornin'. 'Ow'd ya sleep?"

"Okay.""Good." We both spouted nervously at the same time.

"'Ave a seat 'ere." Christopher pointed to a couple of empty stools and joined us across the table. We weren't settled for long when someone spoke above the noise of the crowd and all eyes briefly glanced in our direction. Christopher then announced our presence, although I doubt it was necessary. The group of people was hardly large enough to get lost in. We received many smiles, some waves, and a few chuckles, no doubt about the way I was shielding myself behind Rick's arm.

The food was actually amazing, especially considering it was prepared for a mass gathering. Christopher asked us if we drank coffee and I practically broke into tears as I gushed, "Yes!"

Before you knew it, people were standing up and heading out from the eating area. As they were walking away, I noticed groups being formed and the first sign of children coming our direction. There were maybe eight of them in various stages of childhood; it was difficult to count as they darted about. They quickly gathered together at the closest table to the fire and sat down to eat. They took turns glancing in our direction as they giggled between bites.

"Is that all the children of the village?"

Christopher scanned over the grouping briefly before responding, "Yeah, 'at's all of 'em."

"It doesn't seem like very many."

"Hiki women aren't fer'ile for very long. Each one is only capable of 'aving no more than two children in their lifetime."

"Really? Why?"

"Don't know. Genetics. It's very specific to this tribe. None of the othah tribes are affected the same way."

"Can it be something on the island?"

Christopher grinned widely, "Nah, it's not that. Visitors don't 'ave any problem gettin' knocked-up. There's one couple been 'ere four times. 'As four kids. Not too difficult to figure tha' one out."

Rick glanced furtively in my direction for a brief moment but avoided direct eye contact. He's probably worried that if we do actually have sex here, I might get pregnant. That could complicate things considerably.

"Wonder why they have problems with it here, then."

"No one's sayin' it's a problem. If they 'ad more kids, they'd 'ave a population explosion, and then an inbreeding issue, most likely. This is nature's way of skirtin' disastah. No, they see it as more of a blessin'."

The next group of adults finished their chores and scurried off.

"People clear out of here fast."

"Everyone 'as a job to do. No sense in sittin' 'round. Laziness doesn't feed, propagate, or protect the Hiki. You see, they live by a sort of code of contribution. Every individual contributes. It keeps their community thrivin'."

"Do they ever change jobs?"

"Sometimes. But only if necessity dictates it. If, say, we needed to clear a path to the lagoon, a couple blokes might stop what they're doin' to get it done. But only if it was more important, more necessary to the Hiki. Understand?"

"Yeah. Pretty simple, actually."

"Righ'."

"What's your contribution?"

"Ah bring payin' customers 'ere, which in turn, buys them medicine, supplies, goats, food they can't grow on the island."

"And what do you get out of it?"

"You're direct, aren't you?"

"I'm an accountant. I know how commerce works."

"Yeah, well, Ah don't take a cut. Instead, Ah get to live 'ere fer free."

"I'd ask you why, but I get the feeling you'll just tell me to wait and see for myself."

"Yah smarter than ya look, mate. Yah gonna understan' a lot more about this place by the end of today. You'll see wha' Ah mean." Christopher then called out something to one of the two women who still remained. He turned and eyed me and then Rick as if he were sizing us up. "Danon is fixing up a batch of paw-pui. It's a balm for fightin' off insects and protectin' ya from the sun. It lasts a couple o' days, even wif bathin'."

I sat upright as if I'd been hit in the back with a two-by-four, "Bathing? What about it? How, when?"

"In the afternoon. Aftah the drinkin' water 'as been collected for the day. Down in the lagoon."

"Does everyone go there at once?" I don't mean to be prude, but...

"Yeah. Well, not everyone, everyday. But most people, yeah. Aw, ya aren't goin' to complain about this, are ya? Ya just sat there eatin' breakfast in the nick; ya gonna tell me this bothers ya, now?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. I guess...I guess it's no different. It's just the idea of it."

Christopher smiled, "You'll get over it soon enough. Anyway, Ah doubt we'll 'ave time today. Ah need to show ya aroun'."

Danon scuffled up and spoke with Christopher as she placed the bowl on the table. She looked over at us with the same expression that Christopher had a few moments earlier and then grinned as she spoke again.




Tribal Unity



"This 'ere is a team sport, mates. You can choose yer partner, whoever ya want to spread this salve on."

"Why can't we just do it ourselves?"

"Because ya can't reach everywhere that is exposed. And because people tend to do a real crappy job of covering themselves. Ah made that mistake the first year of bringin' visitors 'ere. 'Ad to run the poor bloke to the hospi'al before he died of second degree burns. This isn't up for debate. So, who do ya choose Ms. Connell? Danon, here? Myself, or yer husband?"

"My husband, of course."

"Alright. Watch Danon for a couple seconds. It doesn't take much, just a bit, like that. Ya just rub it into yer 'ands and then go to work."

Christopher described what Danon was doing as she scooped up handful after handful of the special balm to distribute over Christopher's skin. She was meticulous. She ran her delicate fingers into the ridges and crevices of his ears, his brow, under his chin, his armpits.

"G'ahead, ya go' it."

I dipped my fingers into the goop. It was cool and silky smooth. I dropped my nose toward my hand to take a sniff. There was a very subtle odor that I didn't recognize; not unpleasant at all, I decided.

Starting with Rick's face, I ran my paw-pui fingers across his forehead, massaging his brow with my thumbs and flattening my palms down his cheeks. He looked up at me from his sitting position and smiled. It was a sweet smile. He's always had such a kind face. I rubbed my hands together and decided I needed more goo before moving to his ears and neck.

The veins running down the sides of his muscular neck column felt interesting and I traced their lines until they disappeared into his clavicle. I glanced over to Danon. She had moved behind Christopher and was just reaching his lower back. I knew it wasn't a speed contest or anything but I felt compelled to at least try to keep pace with her. These people must be the Type A tribe of all time. I mean, seriously, for living on an island, these people sure don't waste any time kicking back.   I quickened my pace across Rick's chest, shoulders, arms, and back. Christopher was now standing to provide easier access to his legs. I motioned for Rick to do the same and stepped back stunned. I looked up at him for an explanation and he just shrugged and smiled.

Pointing directly at me as if it were deliberately ratting out the culprit, was Rick's very aroused member. I felt the heat climb up my cheeks and something else...no, I'm imagining it. I'm not turned-on by this.

I glanced over at Danon to see how they were reacting to Rick's shameful state, but they didn't seem to notice. Or to care, I should say. It was impossible not to notice. Just as I was about to turn back to my task at hand, so to speak, Danon's hands cupped Christopher's semi-hard penis and began slathering it with cream. She handled it a bit rougher than one might if they were trying to seduce, but not rough enough to be stroking it. She was simply doing her job, covering his skin with paw-pui, nothing more or less. She covered his scrotum, handling that area a little gentler. Christopher's body was reacting the same as Rick's. His once flaccid penis was now fully erect from her ministrations.

My eyes averted as soon as I had come to my senses and realized I was staring. Oh, hell! What is Rick going to think? My cheeks grew hot with embarrassment. I smiled guiltily up at Rick and then proceeded to start on his legs. Squatting down to cover his calves and feet presented a challenge I hadn't thought about. It placed my face in line with Rick's pelvic area. Apparently, this introduced some thoughts in Rick's mind as well, because his firm dick stood up even more, straining for attention.

A buzzing sensation traveled through my body, sending my hairs on end. I don't remember him being that big. Dayam! Random images of us in college flashed before my eyes briefly. I bit my lip to stay grounded. Just get through this, girl. Don't lose your head. My hands traveled back up his leg, marking the completion of that section. This left only the region south of his navel and north of his thighs. Oh, my! And his condition hadn't tampered a bit. He was fully erect, waiting for my hands to finish the job I started.

The bowl of paw-pui was nearly empty, just enough to finish the job before a new batch could be made. I might have had Danon and Christopher's undivided attention at this point since they had finished their task, but they seemed only mildly interested in us. They appeared to be chatting casually about a topic of interest, gesturing to the thicket and trees as they conversed.

I sucked in a lungful of air and held it as my well-oiled hands reached for his hard cock. He let go a low guttural groan at my touch and my eyes darted across the table briefly and then back to what I was doing. Using both hands to spread the cream along his shaft, I tried to avoid stroking him repeatedly. It would just make matters worse for him, I decided. I circled his bulbous head with one palm and dragged my thumb over the slit just for good measure. Okay, maybe that one wasn't necessary, but I enjoyed it.

Taking Danon's lead, I very gingerly reached for his sack below and massaged cream all around it. I might have taken an extra stroke than what was absolutely necessary. Last week I'd rather have gotten a root canal than touched his private parts. This is kind of fun. Safe, because he can't really do anything about it. He's not going to beg me to give him a blow job or offer to do some household chore so he can fuck me from behind. He won't do any of that in front of these people. He just has to stand here and take it with a raging hard on. I contemplated going farther for a few moments, pretending to inspect the area for missed spots when a competing thought entered my mind. That was a long time ago. When was the last time he even wanted to have sex with me?

"I'm done."

Danon nodded and disappeared with the empty bowl. There was no mistaking the finality in my tone. Rick sat down on the stool. A perplexed expression, complete with wrinkled brow covered his face. I reacted with a forced smile and a slight shake of my head. It was an old argument and I could hear all the damaging words and phrases thundering in my head as if they'd just been bellowed moments ago. Rick zeroed in on my face, piercing me with those hazel eyes that turned green when he was really angry. I could feel his stare even as I was avoiding direct contact. Not here. Not now. There's nothing left to say about it. There was just too much history between us.

Danon returned with the paw-pui and I put on my best expression of indifference that I could muster. No one said I had to enjoy this.

"It's yer turn to choose, mate. Did she do a good enough job to reciprocate, or shall we trade?"

Rick paused maybe a few seconds longer than was necessary before answering. Probably to punish me for the attitude I displayed at the end. Or because he's tired of me and would really like the opportunity to get his hands on another woman. A less frigid woman.

"I think I'll stick with my partner. It may be my only chance to torture her today."

Rick stood up as he finished delivering his little speech and glared down at me. I could have sworn that a rush of heat radiated off his body at that moment, reminding me of his strength. I stood, but did sneak a peek toward his pelvis as I did so. He had softened considerably.

Rick started by asking me to hold up my hair so he could cover my upper back first. I twisted my blonde locks into my fist and rested my hand on my head while he went to work. The cream was cool on my warm skin but seemed to heat up quickly under his massaging fingers. I released my hair and he went to work on my arms for a few moments, first one and then the other, taking long sweeping strokes with his massive hands.

I took in a cleansing breath and released a long sigh. I wasn't even conscious of doing it at first but Rick's upturned lips brought it to my attention. Okay, so it's relaxing. So what.

He fumbled around my ear canal, unable to fit his fat fingers in my tiny ears. He used the fatty part of his palm to massage the balm into my ear instead and decided that would just have to do. It felt like it worked to me so I didn't argue. His fingers trailed from my face down to my neck and it sent a chill down my frame. My neck has always been so sensitive.

Rick smiled at my reaction and I could see a million memories flashing across his eyes as we locked gazes. He knew exactly how sensitive I was there. He'd discovered it on our first date, outside the commons. It was totally innocent, I remember. You brushed a whirlybird leaf off my shoulder and I shivered in shameless delight. I remember. It felt like I was whispering my thoughts to him through my eyes. And then later, the next week maybe, you kissed me there, over and over again until I melted in your arms. I remember.

"Put your hands on your head," Rick spoke in a low scratchy voice.

I complied without even thinking. Still caught up in the memories I hadn't dared think about for so many years. He massaged fresh balm into his hands and pressed them both to my armpits at the same time, and without stopping, slid directly to my breasts. His hands cupped both of my breasts at the same time while my arms were raised in silent offering. I bit back a groan but he missed none of it. He knew what he'd just done, too. He'd reenacted a portion of one of the best nights of sex in our lives. And he did it in broad daylight, outside, in front of strangers.

I relaxed my arms and let them fall to my sides. Rick made one last pass over my breasts and it was readily apparent to me at that moment that my nipples were solid points, tight, hard, and sensitive as hell. They seemed to be reaching out to his fingertips as they lingered past, and there was nothing I could do about it. Then I felt it. Down below. The unmistakable shifting of flesh, swelling, opening, moistening with anticipation. God, I'm so glad no one can see this. It would be so mortifying.

Rick's hands moved down my torso and along my hips. Rather than walking behind me to slather my butt, he reached around my sides, massaging my cheeks in a more suggestive way, and slipping his fingertips into the crack of my ass for good measure. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten him so worked up before. I was beginning to realize just how worthy an adversary he was in this little game we were playing.

I lowered my eyes to check his arousal meter. It was standing at attention again. The mere sight of his stiff cock created tension for me because it added to my problem. I knew if this game lasted much longer, if Rick continued to invoke old memories, my little secret arousal wasn't going to be a secret, anymore. It wasn't at all uncommon when we first dated for Rick to reach down into my panties to discover a hidden river. True, it hadn't happened lately, but that didn't mean I was incapable. Just not wanton.

He moved his hands skillfully over my feet, calves, thighs. I breathed a sigh of relief, knowing he was nearly finished but I should've known better. On his last sweep over my upper thighs, he managed to casually brush his fingertips along my labia. My wet labia. A smirk settled on his lips and knew I had lost the match. Damn him.

"Finished?"

Christopher's voice snapped me out of the inner dialogue that was chastising me over losing my head.

"Are we?" Rick eyed me suggestively and I nodded, turning my head away in shame. Rick's low chuckle climbed up my spine.

****

Chapter Five: Mothers and Martyrs



We spent the next few hours observing the villagers at work. There were all sorts of tasks being performed. Many of the elders, men and women alike, worked with their hands from a sitting position, grinding herbs and seeds, and making various implements, from baskets and urns, to arrows and paddles. Some people gathered fruits, berries, herbs, flowers, and plants for a variety of purposes while others gathered water, making trip after trip from the lagoon to the holding well near the huts. There were the less pleasant tasks of sewage control, and general cleanup like you would expect in any society, but these individuals were not regarded any lower or higher than any other contributing member. All tasks seemed to carry the same status.

At the end of each day, the tribe gathers to discuss what, if anything, needs to change for the next day, and to make decisions that will affect the livelihood of every individual living there. It is not mandatory to attend the meeting but everyone is invited. We watched from the edge of the circle, and although we couldn't understand what they were saying, the dynamic of the group was readily apparent. I think I was most amazed by how respectful they were to one another. Each idea, or point of view, or whatever they presented, was considered thoughtfully. They listened, they deliberated, they discussed, and at the end of the day, reached complete consensus as to what their goals were for the following day. It was utterly astounding to me.

I began to see these people in a different light. At first, it was easy to just label them as primitive and leave it at that, believing that there could be nothing to learn from them. I was starting to think that maybe I was wrong about that. That maybe the way I defined civilization was all messed-up. In a lot of ways, maybe in every way, the Hikis were far more civilized than my own countrymen. And their sense of community was so strong, so embedded in their very nature, I couldn't help but want to be a part of it.

It was totally different; a complete departure from anything I'd ever imagined could exist. Their sense of community was like a living thing to me. Nothing happened between two people that everyone wasn't a part of. If a dispute rose between parties, everyone discussed it and solved it together. If a man and a woman weren't talking, everyone intervened. The concept of individuals, couples, family, were all expanded to include every single member of the village. To drive this point home, Christopher described their parenting philosophy to us as something like this:

The concept of mother and of father applies to every woman and man in the village, respectively. When a baby is born, it spends the first two days in it's birth mother's arms, nursing from her breast and learning her scent. On the third day, the infant is moved to another woman who acts as a wet nurse for the next several days. There are no less than two, sometimes three wet nurses who rotate infants and children between them. This allows the birthing mother to stop producing milk and go back to being productive amongst the people. Usually two days isn't long enough for her body to produce real milk so this is a relatively short period of time. It was all very practical; all in the spirit of maintaining maximum productivity and minimal vulnerability for as many women as possible.

After this point, the child belongs to everyone, and he/she will refer to every woman in the tribe as 'Chaka', or mother. Children live with the wet nurses until they come of age, but spend a great deal of their time with every villager. All adults are responsible for the care and discipline of every child equally.

Fathers are a bit of a different story since it is conceivable that any male could be the paternal father. There is no concept of marriage or fidelity, although strangely, most of the people remain steadfastly faithful to whomever they share a hut with. Women who are 'of season' will lie with any unattached male in order to increase her chance of conception. This isn't, however, necessarily always the case. If there are too few unattached males or if an attached male believes he can get the job done, anyone is likely to step up to the task.

I immediately understood Christopher's statement about inbreeding becoming a problem with overpopulation. It becomes a mathematical equation of proportions, calculating the probability of reproducing a single line across multiple generations. In the simplest terms, the fewer offspring, and the longer gap between inceptions, the less likely they are to experience problems with deleterious alleles. What was really interesting to me, was that not a single one of these people had ever been to college and studied genetics. They just knew it would be problematic.

On the other hand, a much sadder realization came to my mind. The symptom of limited fertility may actually be a product of recessive genes, and an early sign that their civilization is facing extinction. It depressed me knowing that they probably realized this, too. But in reality, how much longer before a disease, or some other disaster, a tsunami maybe, would come and wipe out their entire village. I suddenly felt very fortunate to be spending this time with them and witnessing this miracle, before it was lost in the South Pacific forever.

We spent the hour or so after dinner visiting with various people. Christopher remained on hand to translate their welcomes, their well-wishes, and other niceties. It was good to feel welcome, to feel a part of this place, but by the time we reached the door of our hut, I could barely keep my eyes open. We hardly exerted ourselves, but the anxiety over the experience, the heat, and all the stimuli, was taking a toll on me. I was beyond exhausted; I was spent.

We crawled into bed where I fell into a deep, dreamless slumber.

I think I heard it a second before Rick did. I opened one eye to peek, and there she stood. She was six, maybe, and standing just inside the door of our hut. Rick shifted his body slightly toward her, unwittingly blocking my view, so I scooted toward him, placing my chin on his upper arm to peer over his massive frame.

Her eyes were like brown saucers, filling her entire face. And they were full of mischief. She was, no doubt, a handful for even an entire village, I was certain. Her arm lifted and I thought she might wave, but then she just hooked her fingers in her mouth and giggled.

"Good morning, little one."

Rick's voice startled her a bit and her body flinched. She stepped backward until her heel touched the edge of the doorway and then spun and ran off. Rick and I looked at one another and laughed. I started to settle back on my side of the bed but Rick swung his arm across my pillow and pulled me onto his chest, instead.

I hesitantly relaxed onto him, a bit stiffly at first. It felt strange to be close to him; and yet right, at the same time.

We didn't say anything. My mind was busy replaying the events of the previous day, trying to avoid the whole paw-pui incident for fear of what that might do to my body. I didn't know why, but I wasn't ready for that. For sex; for intimacy. I wasn't ready to open myself up to that level of vulnerability with him again. But I was already starting to feel more open to him; more able to like him, again. I was ready to stop hating him, anyway. It's a step in the right direction.

The day began in much the same fashion; breakfast, hurried mingling. Rick asked Christopher if he thought I needed another coating of paw-pui. My elbow may have accidentally come in contact with his ribs. There was, however, no room for paw-pui nonsense in our schedule so the jab was completely unnecessary. Felt good to do it, though. Felt like old times, actually. When we used to joke around with each other.

"Can we see where the children live?"

"Uh, yeah. Sure. It's just on the other side of those trees. Ah was plannin' to take ya by there latah t'day but we can go now."




Tribal Unity



I glanced at Rick and he was smiling down at me. I wondered if he was as curious as I was about the little girl. About all the children, really. As we started to walk in that direction, Rick placed his hand on the small of my back to guide me ahead of him through the narrow passageway that led out to the cluster of huts. Nice.

The building that housed the children surprised me. It was newer and made of entirely different materials than the huts. It appeared to be stucco or something like that, much more sturdy and permanent than the mud and thatch structures we slept in.

"Wow! This is...not what I was expecting."

"Me, either. When was this built?"

"We finished it o'er a ye'ah ago, Ah think. Business 'as been good. Serves as the village sheltah in bad weathah."

"So all the unhappy couples paid for this?"

"Yeah, more or less."

We walked through the doorway into a room that felt much cooler than the outside air. Mats lined one of the walls and there were a few modern toys on the ground, crayons, coloring books, balls. About what you would expect from a pre-school back home.

I pointed to the toys, "I don't get it."

"Some of our repeat visitors bring toys back fer the kids. It's nice; teaches 'em a bit about the outside world."

"Where are all the children?"

"Workin', some of 'em. The rest are learnin'."

"I guess school doesn't make much sense for them."

"Not the kind of school you mean. No use fer it. They school in a diff'rent way. By spendin' time with diff'rent folks, they learn about values, rules, their history. How to act, how not to act. Practical skills so they can be useful."

"How long do children live here?"

"Oh, Ah don't know. No one keeps track of 'ow old they are. When they start workin' as 'ard as the rest, or when they're knocked up, or jus' plain ready, Ah s'pose. Diff'rent for ever'one. Gotta get pas' council, though. Buildin' a 'ouse is 'ard work."

I took one last look at the toys before stepping out through the doorway. I tried to imagine which ones our little friend played with. Rick leaned down toward my ear as we were leaving.

"I'm sure we'll see her again soon."

He scooped my hand up into his and gave it a brief squeeze before releasing it. It caught me off guard. I had forgotten that once upon a time, before we were killing ourselves to try to get pregnant, Rick loved children as much as I did. It was one of the reasons I married him in the first place. But several months of counting days, checking my temperature, special diets, tests, supplements, and forced sex, led him to say things like 'I don't think I want to have kids' and 'I don't even want to have sex anymore'. It hurt. Probably more than I'll ever admit to him. More than I'll admit to myself. And the worst part was that it was largely my fault.

I don't mean it was my fault that I didn't get pregnant, apparently we're both healthy and fully capable, but the pushing was all me. Looking back, I was pretty militant about it. Another thing I'll never admit to Rick. So I suppose all those things he said were just in reaction to being pushed too hard. I don't know. He could have just told me to chill out about it. Or...did he, and I just didn't want to hear it? I was pretty focused on the prize.

"Ah feel Ah need to warn ya that we 'ave a gal in season at the moment. Ah'm jus' tellin' ya 'cause ya might see more than ya bargained fer. Tha's all Ah'm sayin'."

Rick turned to me with raised eyebrows. I shrugged. He did indicate that girls in season were pretty popular. I was suddenly curious about other aspects of the sexual health of the villagers. Questions lined up in my mind. Questions I would never ask. Do they have intercourse just for fun, or only when it might produce offspring? Is oral sex allowed? What about homosexuality? How young do they start having sex? When and where do they do it? The last question was pretty valid considering these people operated on a pretty tight schedule. They appeared to be busy every second of the day.

Christopher led us to the beach where we first came ashore. He explained that he needed to make a few arrangements, 'andle a few thins', he said. He'd been carrying a knapsack over his shoulder and he swung it off his back and to the ground, producing a cell phone. My eyes grew wide for a second and then I realized, of course he has some way to communicate with the outside world. How else would he be able to run a business and make transportation arrangements?

He held the phone up to his ear and listened for several minutes. Rick walked down to the edge of the water and I followed. Waves rolled onto the shore and over our feet. The water was warmer than I thought it would be. Sand shifted under my feet as the tide pulled the wave back out again. The water level inched up our ankles toward our calves.

I scanned the surrounding area for any large, dark shadows that could be sharks. Rick grabbed my waist real fast and growled, "Watch out" to scare me.

"Stop it. There are sharks in the waters down here, you know."

"Where?" He teased.

"I'm serious. I saw it on the internet when I was trying to find this island."

"I'm sure there are."

I looked down around my feet longingly. I desperately wanted to get off my feet, but I didn't want to be picking sand out of my crack for the rest of the trip.

"There's a lot of downsides to not wearing clothes."

"Like what?"

"Like...sand. I want to sit down, but..."

"Yeah, I know," Rick chuckled. "But there's a lot of upsides, too."

"Oh, yeah? Like...?"

"Well, getting ready in the morning is faster. Way faster."

"I agree."

"Less sweat, it feels like, and no laundry."

"Oh, good one. I like that I can tell what's on your mind, or not on your mind."

Rick tuned to me with a puzzled look on his face. "Have you been checking me out, Mrs. Connell?"

"No, I'm just saying."

"I think you're flirting with me."

"Oh, you would think that. I just find it refreshing for a change to be able to read your thoughts. You're always so stoic."

"I am? Stoic?"

"Yeah, well, difficult to read, anyway."

"How 'bout now?"

Rick turned toward me and placed his hands on his hips with a big smile on his face; his semi-hard dick pointing toward me.

"Rick!"

"What?"

"Where did that come from?"

"Where do you think it came from? Where it always comes from...you."

"Not always."

Rick tilted his head and scratched his scalp. "What do you mean?"

"C'mon, let's be real. We haven't had sex in months. I know you haven't gone months without."

"Is that what's been bothering you, baby? You think I'm...what...seeing someone else?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. It's crossed my mind as a possibility."

"Even with things the way they've been with us lately, I never...not once has that even entered into my mind."

"Not even with Cassie, down the street?"

"Cassie? The girl with the dog?"

I nodded.

"No, especially not the girl with the dog. She's just a kid, for God's sake."

Rick ran his fingers through his wavy brown hair and then rubbed his eyes.

"Lori, honey, how did we get here? I mean, how could we have let this get this bad?"

"I don't know. I ask myself the same question all the time."

"I want to say this now while we're talking. I've never...It's always been you. Since the first time we...I can't even look at anyone else, you have to believe me. It's important to me that you understand that much."

Tears started to roll down my cheeks. I felt guilty for even suggesting that he might be having an affair. The worst part was that deep down inside, I knew he wasn't. I just wanted to believe that there was some other reason for him to keep his distance other than the fact that I had done everything in my power to push him away. I wanted our failure to be entirely his fault, not mine.

My face dropped to my hands so I could sob without the added humiliation of him seeing my blotchy cheeks and shiny red nose. Warm hands rubbed my back and then I felt his arms closing around me until my forehead was touching his chest. Rick gently tugged at my forearms and then firmly wrapped his hands around my wrists to pull my hands around his back.

"C'mon, just give in and hug me. I promise not to bite."

I shook my head but hooked my hands behind his back to hug him like he asked.

"I'm so sorry..." I managed to choke out between sobs. "I let my mind...wander...about...and it's not you...I've been so...stupid."

"No, Lori, don't say that. Don't...everything isn't your fault. It just went haywire, that's all. I've been stressed out about work, and then I've disappointed you by not getting you pregnant. It's...it's just too much."

"No, you didn't disappoint me. I disappointed me. I didn't know when to stop pushing."

"Listen, you have to stop beating yourself up so much and acting like it was your failure. I was there, too, remember."

I had made martyrdom an artform over the past several months. I couldn't remember the last time I felt anything other than sorry for myself over the fact that we couldn't get pregnant. And I had tried to find anything I could to add to my list of woes, even if it meant inventing reasons like my husband's imaginary infidelity. Or creating bad situations, like refusing to have sex with my husband to create enough tension between us to dissolve the marriage completely.

Maybe it wasn't entirely my fault, but it was mostly me. I am so fucked up. And then there was the nagging notion inside my brain that Rick deserved better than me. And if I think that, then he must know it, too.

It was a vicious circle and I still couldn't see my way clear of it. I don't know how to make myself feel better. To lift this heavy guilt.

Rick rubbed my back briskly, "Christopher is off the phone."

I nodded and stepped away from his chest, wiping the tears from my cheeks. Rick bent his knees, trying to look into my eyes.

"I'm okay." I sniffled and gave him a weak smile.

Rick nodded and then stood upright. He slid his hand down my arm until he was gripping my hand in his. He locked his fingers with mine and whispered, "Let's go."

****

Chapter Six: The Lagoon



I was walking through the entire day in my mind. Every word spoken, every smile, incidental touch, and every time I wished things were different. But my general attitude had changed about it. I felt calmer, more in control for some reason. It wasn't so hard to face the harsh reality of our situation and evaluate it in a more rational way. It had seemed so dire when we were back home; like it was the end of the world or something. But I was slowly coming to the realization that there were just so many more vital things to focus on than our petty differences.

Rick and Christopher had a long discussion about the financial affairs of the village. Rick feels that he can help them invest their money more wisely to make it last longer, sustain their way of life for several more generations. Christopher was hesitant to agree, and admittedly said it wasn't up to him, alone. He said he would consider bringing it up at council. He wasn't as open and trusting as the rest of the people. I think he wanted to trust Rick, but he wasn't ready to, yet. God, I know how that feels.

I witnessed an energy I hadn't seen in Rick in years. A sense of purpose around helping these people. His entire demeanor changed and he appeared, I don't know...taller to me, in a way. He was proud of what he did, of what he could do for them. It made me proud, too, and happy for him. Genuinely happy.

At bedtime, we talked again briefly about serious things, real things, our problems. We had talked more in the past two days than the past two months, combined. I guess taking away all other opportunities for conversation left us with only one person to talk to. Christopher may have spoken our language, but he made it perfectly clear that he preferred to spend his time with the natives, or with a native in particular, I wasn't sure which. He kept his private life from us, like he was drawing a very clear line of professional relationship versus personal relationship. It forced us to rely on only each other for company.

Something Rick said the night before kept playing over in my mind: I only stopped asking because your answer never changed. It was always no; after awhile, I couldn't take the rejection.

He was referring to sex, of course. I've hurt him. I'd hurt him badly enough to make him deny his own urges. And now? What am I doing now? I was becoming aware of my own urges, again. It started with paw-pui, but there was more than a handful of other times that I could feel my body responding to his touch, or his furtive glances in my direction, or even his low voice. But I was still pulling away from him, warring with myself over what to do. I knew if I initiated sex, Rick would be happy to oblige, but I couldn't bring myself to take that step. It just didn't feel right to me.

Part of me, I know, wanted him to initiate sex because I needed to feel wanted, desired. And part of me was afraid. I wasn't sure of what, exactly, but definitely afraid he might take that step and then...I don't know. I didn't know what would happen next. And if it went well at first, still...how long would that be enough? How long before I would want more...want to get pregnant, have children, satisfy my basic instinct to reproduce? How could I be sure we wouldn't end up exactly where we are today?

I let that last thought swirl in my head until my mind went blank. It was still very early in the morning and there was hardly a sound coming from the nearby huts. There was just barely enough light to begin to make out the subtle shapes of the interior mud walls of the tiny space we occupied. I closed my eyes and turned my attention outward. I'd been living in my head for the past couple of days and it was becoming a damn boring and depressed place to be all the time.

I heard rustling nearby and focused on that sound. A sigh, a breathy moan; someone dreaming, probably. I turned my head to try and catch other sounds but was stopped by another, slightly higher pitched sigh joining in chorus with a deeper groaning. Is that...what I think it is? I held my breath to hear better and barely made out the sound of skin slapping against skin. Oh, God, it is. They're having sex next door.

It was vivid in my mind, the image of a man and a woman lying prone. Nude, sweaty bodies writhing together. I pictured him holding her thighs wide apart to drive deeper inside her. Deep. Hard. Glistening wet as he pulled out for another stroke. My eyes darted toward Rick without moving another muscle in my body. His steady breathing confirmed that he was still fast asleep.

I could feel the wetness already starting to soak the inner lips of my sex. In the hut next door the rhythm increased. They weren't as quiet as before; at least she wasn't. Her orgasm was approaching. It was a real orgasm, not a fake one. The pitch of the tiny cries that periodically escaped her lips was rising.

I slid my hand slowly across my thigh and very gingerly parted my legs so as not to disturb Rick. I suppressed a groan when my fingers parted my folds to discover a well of wetness. I'm so wet. And so damned horny right now. I forged my middle finger past my folds and into my warm, sopping wet opening. Yes. That feels so good. I played with the lubrication, rubbing it up onto my clitoral hood, circling the growing nub. I had to consciously keep myself from undulating my hips against my fingers. It just felt so damned good to be aroused again.

I knew it wouldn't take me long to get off. I hadn't come in...too long. I added a second finger and then a third, plunging inside best I could without moving too much. It felt amazing to be filled inside. It's not enough, though. I want more. My thoughts began warring again but I shut them out by moving my fingers back to my clit. The nub was fully erect, hard and sensitive and now wet with my own juices. I rolled it between my fingers, pinching and rubbing until the little bundle of nerves rewarded me with an explosion the likes of which I can't remember ever feeling before.

I bit my lip hard and panted through my nose, trying to remain still through the convulsions. Yes. Holy cow, that felt good. I wiped my wet fingers on my inner thigh and finally resumed enough of a steady breathing rhythm to release my lip. I tasted a hint of blood and knew that I had bit down a tad too hard. No big deal.

I lay there and listened. The couple next door had finished and were now moving about. I need to pay better attention to who lives there. It will make for a more vivid mental image next time. Next time? Holy shit, I'm becoming a pervert. A desperate pervert, at that. It would be far easier to just seduce your husband, wouldn't it? I mean, at least you wouldn't have to sneak around like a teenager or something.

A few minutes later, I managed to nonchalantly roll out of bed and head for the toilet. I took care of business and finished cleaning up at the sink. All the while Rick remained on his side, sound asleep.

This day was hotter than the others, it felt to me. I mentioned it to Christopher and he explained that it was because storms were on the way. The temperature wasn't any higher, the humidity had just risen like it so often does when a storm approaches.

I turned my attention to the people of the village, curious as to how they felt about the approaching rain. If they were at all nervous, they hid it well. I couldn't detect a single ounce of anxiousness on their faces. They moved about in exactly the same way they had before. At least I think they did. It was the first time I'd really looked hard at them. Really felt comfortable enough to observe longer than just for a couple seconds at a time. I guess I was raised in pretty modest surroundings, not prudish, exactly, but not the kind of place where you could look at nude bodies without some sense of shame. I didn't feel shameful, myself, but I think the teachings of my early childhood in the Catholic Church were still with me.

I started to notice little things about the way the people interacted with one another. The way they constantly touched each other. I caught sight of a man caressing a woman's breast as they talked, very casually; in fact, absentmindedly. They didn't seem to have boundaries like we did. Or is that just me? Rick doesn't seem to have boundaries.

It was like I was seeing the Hiki's for the first time. And really, I was. I hadn't allowed myself to see them in this way. I was only observing the safe things: their work, their food, their schedule. I was looking past the individuals and focusing on the group as a whole from a distance. I hadn't really allowed myself to be a part of them, to know them, and I certainly hadn't let them know me. Why is that such a hard thing to do? Am I afraid of what they'll discover?

Rick ran his thumb over my bottom lip after breakfast, "You bit your lip."

I shrugged. If you only knew...

"It was probably when you came this morning."

"Wh-what?"

"When you were masturbating in bed and came. You remember, don't you?"

My face felt like molten lava. "I, uh...didn't know you were awake."

"Yeah. I didn't want to disturb you. Anyway, it was over pretty fast. Must've needed it, huh?"

I nodded slightly and looked away. The whole thing was just so humiliating.

Rick chuckled, "Look, it's okay. I'm not trying to give you shit about it or anything. It's just natural; nothing to be ashamed of."




Tribal Unity



He shrugged and pivoted his shoulders away from me, sending a wash of relief over my entire body. The conversation was over and I lived through it. Rick was looking at the clouds moving overhead. They weren't particularly menacing but they were the first clouds we'd seen since we got to the island.

"I wonder when this thing is going to hit."

"Not til latah." Christopher answered Rick.

It wasn't until then that I realized that he probably heard our entire conversation. I looked guiltily up at Christopher but he seemed disinterested in me. Is it just me that finds this embarrassing? Geez!

Children started to appear a couple at a time until they were all gathered around the table like usual. Our little friend sat wedged between two older children, one boy and one girl, capturing the attention of most of the group. She was every bit as impetuous as I first thought she might be, and I saw so much of myself in her. At least the girl I used to be. I had difficulty taking my eyes off her and so when she took a breath between sentences and glanced over, we locked gazes.

Rather than look away, as I was ordinarily accustomed to doing from years of practicing western culture etiquette, I stayed put and maintained eye contact. She wrinkled her nose and grinned impishly and then curled her fingers in a subtle wave of greeting. I smiled and waved back but then one of the other children said something that averted her attention from me to them. I waited for a few seconds, but her mind was elsewhere now. Her momentary curiosity about me had passed.

Rick was chatting with Christopher and it was clear to me just how entirely self-centered I really was. They hadn't even noticed my ten second exchange with my new friend, and neither the children nor the two men, were paying attention to me at that moment. It's not about me. I'm nothing more than a single member of the group. Suddenly I felt like I was being left behind. I was standing still waiting for people to notice me and make judgment, but it wasn't happening. They were all moving along about their business; onto the next topic of business or play. No real energy was spent on self-wallowing or pity for someone else, because it just wasn't important.

This observation was a source of great relief to me, but also a source of fear. It became apparent, to me anyway, that I might actually stay stuck where I was while Rick moved on, if I didn't make up my mind. Hadn't Christopher said something about that when we first arrived? That these people don't wait. I had thought it was because they were some rare form of island Type A personality. It wasn't that at all. They aren't overly self-involved. They stretch their focus outward, but not to the extent of enabling others to become self-involved, either. How brilliant. How utterly stable.

Christopher informed us that when rains were heading toward the island, water gatherers changed their routine to allow for a second method of collecting drinking water. In short, it freed up the lagoon for bathing and we were allowed to go at any time. This was good news. Even though I didn't feel like I needed it as much as I would've after a few days without bathing back home, I longed to be in the water. Swimming, bathing, whatever.

We were reminded on how to get there and then Christopher excused himself from our presence. I noticed that this was something he was doing gradually more each day. What do you expect? He has a life, too.

We headed down the path toward the water, Rick in the lead. The lagoon was deserted as we'd been led to believe it most likely would be. The villagers were busy with their daily tasks and seemed to follow pretty tight schedules. Rick stepped down off a smooth rock into the knee-deep water at the rim of the pool.

He turned toward me and I thought he was going to hold his hand out. Instead, he rapidly grasped my waist and pulled me to him, lowering my feet into the water in front of him. I'd forgotten how strong he was. He lifted me like I weighed nothing.   The water was cool and clear. You could easily see the bottom, even at the points where it became quite deep. I was scanning the bottom of the pool, vaguely aware of Rick's hand resting on my hip.

"Christopher would have mentioned it if there was something to watch out for, right?"

"Yeah, no worries, mate." Rick said, in a pathetic attempt at an Australian accent.

I laughed and lunged forward into the water. It felt luxurious against my warm skin.

Rick followed behind me, and as soon as we were facing each other, I splashed him.

"Hey! What was that for?"

"For your sorry-ass Australian accent, that's what."

Rick chuckled and then looked around the perimeter of the lagoon until he located what he was looking for. "Over there."

My gaze followed his pointing finger. At one end of the pool of water was a trickling stream feeding fresh water into the pool.

"Where is that coming from?"

"Don't know, exactly. All these islands are volcanic, if that has anything to do with it."

I dipped down, wetting my entire head, then smoothed my hair back against my scalp as I emerged.

"God, you're so incredibly sexy when you do that."

"Oh, stop. I am not."

"I think I'm a better judge of that than you are, missy."

"I know; you know everything."

"No, not everything, but some things. I know you."

"You think you do."

"I do." He latched onto my arm and yanked me toward him until I was flush against his chest. Firmly wrapping his arms around me in a trapping embrace, he lowered his voice to a deep growl, "I know it turns you on to be trapped in my arms like this."

I pressed my palms against his chest to push away from him but he had me secured in his grasp.

"The more you struggle the harder I'll get, Mrs. Connell."

"Rick, stop. We're supposed to be bathing."

"We are bathing. And no, I won't stop. I'm tired of that word, 'no'. I want to hear you say 'yes'."

I shook my head, even though every pore of my body was screaming 'yes' at him.

"I'm not convinced, Lori."

He lowered his head and placed a kiss on my jaw line, close to my ear.

"I think you want this."

I weakly shook my head as my eyelids fluttered to a close. His warm breath tickled my neck for a moment before his lips touched the sensitive skin there. He delivered several tiny kisses to my neck before returning to my ear to whisper.

"I think you want more than this, don't you?"

I whispered, "no."

It was part of a game we used to play. One that used to get me so worked up I'd say or do anything. It had always been my fantasy to be taken like this. Not raped or anything. More like dominated. I liked when Rick didn't ask; he took.

His lips closed on my neck more forcefully and I gasped. Teeth scraped my skin and pulled flesh between them as he sucked and nibbled. Tiny pain sensations mixed with pleasure shot straight down my spine to my sex. My hands moved up toward his head where my fingers wove into his wavy locks of hair. Please kiss me, please, please, please.

As if he heard my thoughts, he abruptly pulled away from my neck and closed his lips onto mine. I tilted my head to open up to him and his tongue snaked between my parted lips. Oh, yes! I moaned into his mouth and he responded by tightening his hold and delving his tongue more forcefully into me.

His kiss consumed me completely. It was powerful and passionate. My entire body was buzzing with arousal; with need. Rick broke our lip contact and grinned a sly, wicked grin.

"You're not getting off that easy. I want to hear you ask for it."

I groaned, "No, please, baby..."

"Yes." Rick wrapped his fingers around my hair and steadily pulled a fistful of it downward until my head was tilted back fully.

The throbbing in my pussy intensified. I was so close to coming.

"Oh, God, Rick, please..."

"Please, what?"

The unmistakable sound of approaching footsteps snapped us back to the lagoon. Prior to that, we could have been anywhere; floating in outer space for all I knew. Rick released my hair but kept me tucked tightly against his chest.

A couple came into view about three quarters of the way around the circular pool. They spotted us almost immediately but wasted no time staring at us. The young woman was in her early twenties, I'd guess, and the man wasn't much older. They were a handsome couple and it was obvious they were attracted to one another.

I tried to pull away from Rick but he maintained his grasp.

"Shhhh, just watch for a second. They're not interested in us."

Rick was correct. They weren't the slightest bit interested in what we were doing, or concerned that we could see them. The young woman sat down on the flat part of the rock next to the water and scooped up a handful to throw at her mate. His only response was to lower himself over her, nibbling the flesh around her nipple before closing his mouth over the center, engulfing her entire perky mound with his mouth.

She laid back and mewled in delight. Without delay, he moved down between her legs, roughly attacking her pussy with his mouth. His head rolled from side to side and up and down as his young mate squirmed and bucked beneath him. It was raw the way he held her torso down with one hand while he gripped her thigh open to assault her with his tongue and teeth. Just as it sounded like she would explode into an orgasm of mammoth proportions, the young man lifted up and very expertly slid his stiff cock inside her wet sex.

His hips bucked wildly for a few minutes, his fingers stroking her clit at a feverish pace until she was screaming her release. He came at the same time, grunting and groaning with heavy thrusts.

A few moments later, he pulled out of her and scooped a handful of water onto his glistening, semi-hard member. He finished rinsing himself off and then stood up. The woman followed him out, not bothering to wash herself or get in the water, as I would have expected. And as far as I could tell, they never spoke a word to one another. Not before, during, or after.

I was stunned. It was all over in a matter of a few short minutes, it seemed. Damn, these people are so efficient. I wondered if she was the one 'in season' or if we just witnessed some secret rendezvous. If it was just to reproduce, would he have been so concerned with bringing her to orgasm? It hardly seems necessary.

We heard voices and a small group of villagers came walking down the pathway toward us. Our time alone was gone. Damn. I was in worse shape, mildly aroused and totally unsatisfied after having witnessed hot sex on the shore.

Rick kissed me on the forehead and loosened his grasp around me. It was disappointing. He didn't indicate as much, but I'd already ran it through in my mind. If I wouldn't have played so hard to get, we'd have had sex and would be happily trotting down the path just like the young couple we'd witnessed.

****

Chapter Seven: A Tropical Storm



Several hours later, it was apparent that the young woman we saw on the shore of the lagoon must be the one in season. If I didn't know better, I'd think she was following us. We ran into her two more times that afternoon with different men. Oddly, the routine was practically identical each time and I wished there was someone I could ask about it. I'm sure as hell not going to ask Christopher. It didn't matter, really. Just curious.

By the time dinner rolled around, I was downright irritable. Arousal had wracked my body and then receded like a yo-yo all day long and my nerves were shot.

I plopped down on the bed and laid back, draping my arm over my eyes.

"It's dinnertime. Aren't you hungry, hon?"

"No. Go ahead. I'm going to take a nap."

"Okay. I'll hurry through and come back and check on you in a bit."

I waved him off without lifting my arm from over my eyes. I could hear the shuffling of feet toward the dining area until gradually there were no more footsteps, no one left behind but me. I sighed deeply, groaning as I released the air from my lungs.

"I changed my mind about dinner."

I lowered my arm to see the dark outline of Rick standing over me. When my eyes adjusted to the light I noticed that his expression was hard; intensely serious. And his cock was standing fully erect before me.

"I decided that I want to eat here, instead. I've been thinking about it all day."

Rick placed one knee on the bed as his hands worked to spread my knees apart.

"Ri..."

"Shhhh, I don't want to hear it, Lori. Just lay there and be quiet...or don't be quiet, I don't care. But don't tell me to stop because I can't. I won't."

He pressed my thighs to the bed, wide apart and stared at my gaping sex before him like a starving man.

"God, I've wanted to do this for so long."

He lowered his face until his lips were brushing against the short hairs blanketing my mons. He parted his lips and gathered a mouthful of my flesh into his waiting mouth, moaning with his first taste of my arousal. My body rewarded him with a gush of hot fluid and he lapped it up greedily. There was something about the way he was attacking my wet pussy that just sent me over the edge right away. My body shuddered with release as I shamelessly ground my hips into his face.

He didn't stop, though. He barely slowed down, only pausing for a moment to reposition his body so he could slide his fingers inside me and curl them around my pubic bone. For a moment I thought I might urinate on him, then I could feel it building again. Another orgasm, right on the tail of the previous one.

My mouth dropped open. I pushed myself up onto my elbows and looked down at him incredulously. He moved his tongue to my swollen, sensitive clit and began circling it relentlessly as his fingers pistoned in and out of my weeping slit. It was an all-out assault with one goal in mind: to make me orgasm.

"Oh, God..." My whispering cries of pleasure turned to non-sensical whimpering, and then to pitiful mewling just before my release. A thousand electrical impulses seemed to explode at once in my clit, lifting my hips off the mattress in the most powerful orgasm of my life.

His fingers slipped slowly out of me as he very gently kissed his way up my tummy. He paused at my breasts, sucking the darker flesh of my nipples through his pursed lips until they were standing up stiffly. Then he flicked them hard with the tip of his tongue. I sighed and ran my fingers through his hair.

"Isn't it nice to just play like this? We used to do this for hours, remember?"

I nodded, "I remember."

Thunder boomed in the distance. "Storm is coming."

"Yeah. I guess we better find out if there's something we need to do."

"Nah. They'll watch out for us. Why don't we just stay here for awhile and get reacquainted?"

"Reacquainted?"

"Yeah. I'm still waiting for you to ask me, ya know."

I smiled, "Is that what you're waiting for?"

"Yeah."

"You know I like it better when you don't ask for permission."

"I know. But just this once, I need to hear it. Just say 'yes' and that'll be good enough."

I shook my head, "I can do better than that. I'll tell you what I was about to say in the lagoon.

"Please fuck me, baby. Take what's yours; what's always been yours."

"Oh, God, honey. Just try to stop me."

Rick rolled his body on top of mine and pinned my wrists to the bed with his hands. He lowered his head to my neck and bit down as he positioned the head of his hard cock at my opening. I tilted my pelvis and he slipped past the outer labia. I could feel my walls expanding to accommodate his berth as he inched deeper into my channel.

His body shook with restraint as he struggled desperately not to spear me in a lustful rush. He grunted through clenched jaw and bared teeth like an angry wolf. When he was fully seated inside me, he froze. A few seconds later, my channel relaxed around the invasion, accepting him, welcoming him home, it seemed.

Rick nuzzled my neck and whispered into my ear, "I want you to come again for me."

"I don't think..."

"Shhhh, yes you can. Just concentrate on my fingers."

Rick released my wrists and I started to slide my arms to my sides.

"Stop. Keep your wrists up there. In fact, clasp your fingers over your head."

I did as he commanded. He pulled himself up onto his knees, and rotated me a bit to the side, making sure to stay fully seated inside me as he did so. He held one knee up and moved his free hand to my clit, pressing his thumb firmly to the little bundle of nerves as he rocked slowly in and out of me.

He felt enormous and the angle placed him deep inside, filling me completely. How perfect. It was incredible. His slow movement, the way he was luxuriating in the act as he traced tiny circles around my now-hard clit, was divine.

I started to pant as my lovely arousal gathered strength. He was gliding more freely now in an easy rhythm, in and out, in, out. Every stroke added to the symphony of sensations. He took my clit between his thumb and forefinger and rolled it back and forth. It brought my orgasm crashing down on me. I opened my mouth to scream but nothing came out. He released my clit and slammed his hips into mine, huffing and growling as he deposited his payload deep inside me. I could feel my walls gripping and milking him in the wake of my climax. He remained perfectly still, deep within me for several minutes.

Fat raindrops landed outside the doorway and within minutes it was a deluge. Outside the tropical storm had arrived, but inside our tiny hut, it felt like the storm was finally past. It felt like we'd managed to turn the corner heading back to where we belonged.

We made love through the downpour, through the night, and into the morning. We talked and laughed until our sides hurt. At some point we noticed that people had placed fruit and nuts inside the doorway. They'd noticed we weren't at dinner and brought sustenance for us. I don't know how we missed seeing anyone doing it. The doorway was only a few short feet from the bed. I guess we were a little preoccupied.

****

Chapter Eight: Adoption



The storm caused some minor problems to one of the pathways that the villagers used for carrying water to and from the lagoon. A large tree near the walkway had died a few years ago and the winds, although not particularly harsh, brought the dead tree down across the path. All of the strongest men were pulling together to move it, including Christopher, so Rick asked to go and help, as well. It was the right thing to do and I shared his need to contribute, in this place where everyone contributed something. Except for us.

The situation left me all alone, however, or so I thought. Rick wasn't gone for five minutes when a woman showed up at the doorway of our hut. She motioned for me to follow her and I did.

She led me to the sitting area just behind the children's dormitory. A group of women were sitting in a circle around a basket. Several stones served as a hard surface for cracking and shelling some sort of nut. I sat and watched for a moment and then imitated what I observed. It was amazingly more difficult to master the technique than I could've imagined and I fumbled several times, taking more than twice as long to complete the task as everyone else. They didn't seem to mind. They chatted endlessly.

I was able to determine a lot about the individuals just by watching their mannerisms and how they interacted with one another. The woman to my left, the one who brought me, was an older woman of some respect. The others looked to her for approval a great deal as they spoke. The woman to my right was immensely shy. Not just around me, I got the feeling, but around all the women. She looked up through her eyelashes a lot and crossed her arms in front of her.




Tribal Unity



The other two women were good friends and seemed to share many thoughts just through eye contact, the way couples do sometimes. The way Rick and I do. They touched each other a great deal in an affectionate way that suggested to me there was a great deal of love between them. Watching them interact reminded me of my childhood friend, Jaimee. We were like sisters growing up. If there was a concept that correlated with sister in this culture, I would believe that was their relationship.

It wasn't long before I could recognize their voices without looking at them. I still didn't know any words outside of 'paw-pui' and 'Chaka' and the names of a couple of the people, but I was coming to listen for the tonal quality of their speech. I sensed that the group dynamic was about to change even before I heard the footsteps on the path.

Two women approached, one of them familiar. It was the young woman I'd seen conjugating with several men the day before. I instinctively looked behind her to see if she had another man in tow. The only person with her was an elderly woman. The young woman smiled as the elderly woman spoke to the group. I noticed the young one's cheeks were flushed pink. Mine would be too if I'd just had that many orgasms in one day. Lucky girl!

There was a break in the conversation and then a few comments from the group to the other two. Whatever information they just shared must've been good news because the ladies were all smiling and laughing. The elder woman looked across the circle at me as if she just noticed my presence. She ambled over to my side and placed her feeble hand on my wrist and smiled at me. She patted my arm and said a few words. I don't know what they were, but it sounded like they were meant to be reassuring.

I smiled back at her and reciprocated the touch by stroking her arm. Her skin was wrinkled and moved when you pet it, but it felt soft to the touch. There was something so grandmotherly about her, but other than just being old, I couldn't figure out what it might be. Just a random feeling, I guess.

The elderly woman motioned to the young woman to come stand by her, and when she did, the elder placed my hand on the young woman's abdomen. She spoke to me and then pressed on my hand as it remained on her belly. I got the feeling she was trying to tell me the young woman was with child but it didn't make sense. She wouldn't know if she just conceived yesterday. It's impossible to know. I thought it a thousand times, believe me. But then the test came up negative, or my period came, one or the other. Every. Time. No matter how much I believed. After awhile, you stop believing. Then you stop hoping, and finally you stop even trying.

I gingerly pulled my hand from her belly and tried not show any emotion. The thought of her being pregnant made me sad. I didn't want to be sad about it. These people need a pregnancy more than I do. But I couldn't help myself. I guess it just brought up bad memories for me. It was a little like pouring salt in an old wound. It just lifted the pain back to the surface again.

I tried not to let my mind wander, but as these women continued their chatting, I fell into a lonely stupor of sorts. Nothing has really changed between Rick and I. We may be talking again and even having sex again, but when we get back home, it will still just be the two of us. Maybe forever if we stay together that long. Rick deserves better. He does. I think I can live like this. I probably deserve it, but he doesn't.

I felt something land lightly on my arm and just as I lifted my hand to swat it away, I realized what it was. My little friend had joined the group and was standing close enough for her long hair to tickle my arm. She looked up at me with defiant eyes as I lowered my hand and I had to laugh. She was just so brave, this little girl. None of the other children came near us, but this little one was more curious than she was afraid.

I held my hand out, palm up to see what she would do. She looked down at it and then with bright eyes, reached into the basket and placed a nut into my palm.

"Thank you."

The women looked up from their tasks and quieted their conversations when I spoke. The little girl answered me with what was most likely the equivalent of 'You're welcome', judging by the tone. It was precious. I wanted to scoop her up into my lap and hug her, but was deathly afraid of scaring her; or more accurately, scaring one of the women. What I wouldn't give to spend a day playing with her. She looked up at me and smiled and then spun on her heel and trotted down the path. I bet she doesn't spend much time in one place.

We finished the hulling, or shelling, or whatever you call it. I remember a saying my dad used to use, many hands make light work. It was absolutely true. Proven over and over in a community like this one, where everyone pitches in and works together.

I wasn't certain where to go next, but I decided that if I could shell a nut I couldn't even name, there must be something else I can do. Besides, I didn't want to be idle. I was tired of doing almost nothing to help out. I know we paid for our vacation there, but it didn't feel like enough. It felt like the lazy way out. I mean, it doesn't take any effort to write a check.

I walked over to the dining area and approached the fire stove. Danon and another woman were standing there. Danon spoke up when she saw me.

"Paw-pui?"

I shook my head, "No."

She repeated, "No," and shook her head in acknowledgement. I was surprised to hear the word coming from her but then thought about it. Of course, they've probably heard a few English words over the years. 'No' is pretty common.

I couldn't think how to ask if I could help them. I was trying to work out how to use gestures to explain, but was drawing a blank. Danon watched my facial expression carefully for a few seconds and then laughed out loud. She patted me on the hand and walked to the storage hut. I wasn't sure if that was her way of saying 'bye' or she was coming back. I waited a few minutes and she returned with a large bowl. She placed it on the table and patted a stool for me to sit.

A few short minutes later, I was kneading some kind of dough. When that was done, I began sifting some sort of meal, and after that, pulling the leaves off of a plant. I'm still not sure which part of the plant was the edible part. Danon kept disappearing in the storage room for another chore and I wondered how on earth these women got all this done every day. There's only two of them cooking for an entire population. Impressive.

Finally, all the pre-preparation was complete and they dismissed me. All the busy work had managed to wear me out.

"Wake up, sleepy head."

I rolled onto my back and squinted my eyes open. "Hey."

"Hey, yourself."

"What time is it?"

Rick chuckled, "I don't know. When you figure out how to tell time in this place, let me know, will ya."

"Did I miss dinner?"

"No, that's why I'm waking you."

"Oh."

"And there's going to be a party tonight."

"A party?"

"Yeah. That busy girl we saw yesterday is pregnant."

"I thought that's what she was trying to tell me."

"Who?"

"An elderly woman."

"Yeah, so, Christopher tells me that she is really old and has this way of seeing, or sensing some things, way before other people can. I guess she can tell when women have conceived."

"No way."

"No, I swear. Christopher said she hasn't been wrong in over 50 years, or something like that."

"No kidding."

"You don't seem happy; what's wrong?"

I shook my head, "Nothing. I'm happy for them. It's good news. It's just that, well, she patted my arm and was trying to tell me something. It sounded like she was trying to console me, that's all."

"Maybe she can just tell what you've been through."

"Or maybe she knows I can't have children. Ever."

"Honey...Please..."

"No, I know."

"Listen, let's just try to take things one day at a time, okay? Like the Hiki do. No sense in worrying over things we can't control."

I nodded, "Okay. I'll try."

"Anyway, I've been thinking...I know you said you didn't want to adopt, but I think we should talk about it. I saw you with that girl yesterday..."

"I saw her again today."

"You did?"

"Yeah. She came right up to me and we interacted. She was so amazing, Rick. So darned brave."

"Just like someone I know." He kissed me on the forehead and smiled, "You ready for dinner?"

"Yeah. I'm ready."

He'd planted a seed I couldn't stop thinking about. Adoption. We'd known couples who'd adopted children from other countries. The idea of doing it ourselves scared the hell out of us. Hard enough raising your own child, but someone else's... And if that child isn't the same race as you, what kind of challenges will that present? I closed my eyes for a moment and pictured her face, her big brown eyes, black hair and deep brown skin. I knew my answer right there. It wouldn't matter what kind of challenge it presented. It'd be worth every uncomfortable second just to see her smile every day.

The 'party' was nothing more than a council meeting with less purpose. It gave me the chance to group faces together by living arrangement. I noticed that the two women that sat across from me earlier were sitting together again. I pointed them out to Rick and he told me that there was actually two lesbians living in the village. It fit. How close they seemed to be, how affectionate they were. I smiled to myself. I like them. They're a cute couple.

Christopher huddled with a woman on the edge of the circle. His fingers traced circles up and down her arms as he whispered in her ear. It was readily apparent that he was very much in love with her, and all of a sudden, his situation started to make perfect sense to me. That's why he stays here. Not for the money. For love. Of course.

I noticed our neighbors, the ones I had heard having sex in the morning. It was a good thing I didn't know what they looked like before I heard them. My reaction would have been completely different.

Couples peeled away from the gathering a few at a time. We stayed long enough to be polite by our standards. I saw children mingling about the group but didn't see our little girl.

Rick pulled me into his arms as soon as we climbed into bed, nestling behind me into a spooning position. He was exhausted from his hard day's work. I had napped earlier and wasn't nearly as exhausted. And I was aroused, for some reason.

I shifted in Rick's arms, trying to invoke a response by wiggling my ass at him.

"What are you doing, baby?"

"Nothing." I pushed my ass against him harder.

"That's not 'nothing'. Are you uncomfortable?"

"No."

"Are you...horny, baby?"

"Maybe."

"Maybe? Or, yes?"

"Okay. Yes."

"Ah, that's a word I like to hear."

Rick's hand cupped my breast, his fingers played with my nipples. I could feel him stiffening against my backside.

"Just the thought of having sex gets you hard?"

"Pretty much. I think most guys are like that."

"Oh, yeah."

"Yeah. How 'bout you; what got you all worked up today?"

"I don't know. Just...working things out, you know. With us. And I've been thinking about your idea. Of adopting. I like it. I mean, it's an option, you know."

Rick nodded, "You're an amazing person, honey. I love you; you know that?"

"Thanks, baby. I love you, too."

The talk was tender, and communicating the sentiment was way overdue. It wasn't, however, in line with the kind of sex I was hoping for. But Rick was tired and I had to respect that. I didn't, however, have to sit back and do nothing about it.

I rolled over in his arms so I was facing him. He kissed me tenderly on the lips, hardly more than a PG-13 rated kiss. I ran my hand down his side and slipped it between us to grip his stiff cock. He released a surprised groan.

"I think tonight it's my turn to take charge."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Just lay back."

I pressed on his shoulder until he was lying flat on his back. Then I pushed the sheet down so he was fully exposed to me. My fingers caressed the silky skin of his hard cock, tracing circles down around his balls every few seconds. Rick moaned in appreciation; his cock engorged.

I slid my torso down the sheets and took him into my mouth in one swift motion. I was hungry for him, for the feel of him filling my wet mouth. It had been a long time. Rick's fingers snaked around my neck where he gripped me possessively to him. Yes.

I loved that even when I took the lead, he made sure I understood who was really in charge. It was the way it worked between us. The more he commanded, the more I obeyed; like two partners perfectly suited for one another on the dance floor. At times like these when it was my agenda, I still needed him to take charge in order to get off. He knew that. He understands me.

"I'll let you have your fun for another minute, but then you're going to climb on top and fuck me."

His words might as well have been tiny fingers directly on my sex, increasing my arousal tenfold. Oh, yes. My body responded to everything about this man. His touch, his voice, his dominance.

I stroked him harder to draw out some pre-cum before I switched positions. Running my tongue along his slit, I savored the salty deposit. Because Rick rarely came in my mouth, I had started to look on it as something of a special treat. Not something I share with my girlfriends. They'd hardly understand since all they talk about is ways to get out of ever having to do this. But I like pleasing him that way because it's so selfless. I can't get off doing it.

I lifted my head when I'd sucked every drop I could off him and swung my leg over his hips. Rick locked his fingers behind his neck to accentuate the fact that it would be all my doing. He smiled seductively at me as I held his cock stiffly in the air and lowered myself onto him. I was so very wet, allowing me to skewer myself onto him with no difficulty.

"Good girl."

It was another phrase he sometimes used to drive me wild. And this time was no exception. My inner walls contracted in delight. We weren't ordinarily heavy talkers during sex. When Rick did speak, however, it was usually to exert his dominance; to play his part in this bedroom fantasy of ours. It drove me insane with lust every time.

I supported my weight on my arms so I could ride him more freely for a bit. Rick occasionally assisted by tilting his hips to meet mine with more force but for the most part, he just watched me work my hips to keep a rhythm going.

"Sit back and pull your feet up by my sides, so you're squatting."

I obeyed. I always obeyed whatever he asked in the bedroom. Our pelvic bones were touching now, he was deep inside me.

"I want to watch you masturbate while you fuck me."

I looked down at the juncture where we connected and then back at him.

"Yeah. Move your fingers over your clit until you come."

I released a ragged breath. What he commanded was so lewd, but I couldn't deny that it also turned me on, beyond belief.

My hand moved over my hip and rested on my abdomen a second. I extended my fingers and reached subtly downward until I felt the edge of my sparse pubic hair, and then the moist evidence of my arousal. My clitoral hood was stretched and the tiny bulbous head of my clit dangled just centimeters over his hard shaft. I stroked the base of his shaft for a few seconds and then traced my own flesh which was stretched tightly around him.

Rick watched my fingers intently. He allowed me the time to casually explore the area, feel our bodies melding together. I tried to imagine how it looked from his angle.

My fingers found their way back to my stretched and distended clitoris. There was plenty of lubrication to work into the area, which was a good thing, because being stretched open like I was, there was nothing to protect my sensitive bud. And it was sensitive.

Applying pressure from above, mostly, I was able work beyond the initial sensitivity. My aroused clit swelled even more until it became possible for me to touch it directly. Using two fingers, I massaged from side to side rapidly. It only took a minute before I fell forward, supporting my weight with my free hand on his chest as my body collapsed in climax.

Rick released his hands from his neck to hold my waist and lift me up and down while he thrust his hips hard into me. He came abruptly. The very sight of me touching myself must've had him teetering on the edge.

When the spasms subsided, Rick pulled me onto his chest and held me. He was asleep before I'd even fully settled there.

****

Chapter Nine: Farewell



I'd truly lost track of the days. Partly because it felt like I was floating blissfully through a fairy tale land where time had no meaning. And partly because I dreaded leaving.

They were right. Our neighbors, their friends, Christopher...everyone who told us this place would fix our problems. We were happier than the day we got married. We were fixed. Mostly.

I was still worried that once we left this place, reality would come crashing down on us and ruin everything again. As much as we liked it in Temehiki, we couldn't live there. So time became my only enemy on that island. Not sharks, or eels, or spiders, or any other insignificant creature. Time. And there was nothing I could do about it.

We had come to perform regular tasks on the island. They really needed Rick's size and strength and I got the feeling they were coming up with things to build while they had his help. Things they probably wouldn't have taken on without him. That was perfectly okay with Rick. I learned something real important about him: The more he is needed, the happier he is.

I can look back and point to a dozen times where I screwed things up between us simply by making him think I didn't need him anymore. I'll never make that mistake again. It's fine to be strong and brave; entirely something different to take things on yourself. I'd even managed to absolve him of any blame or responsibility over our failed attempts at conceiving and our failing marriage, just so I could carry the weight alone. I thought it was a noble thing to do, but there was nothing noble about it.

I didn't want to ask. I knew we only had a handful of days left. Christopher was making regular trips to the beach with Rafin to check the boat and his cell phone messages. As it turns out, that side of Temehiki is the only place he gets a cell signal, off of a transmitter on a neighboring island. He was going there to check our flights, secure our arrangements. During one of his longer absences, I think he may have even checked on our abandoned luggage.

I didn't care whether or not it was still in that shelter. Take it. There's nothing important in there. Just clothes. I repeated the phrase in my mind several times and chuckled, just clothes. I remembered Christopher informing us that we would have to take them off and I nearly puked at the idea. Now...now, I can't picture putting them back on. Funny.

I started to bid my farewell to the island in my own silent way. But not the way I'd done it every other time in my life. Not in a sad, withdrawn sort of fashion. Instead, I reached out more, desperate to make the most of every minute. I spent every waking moment with the people.

Rihann was the name of the little girl I'd grown to love so much. She came to spend much of the midday time with me while I hauled water up from the lagoon. If we finished early, before I had to be in the kitchen, we'd take a nap together in the hut. She'd let me stroke her hair as she babbled herself to sleep. I wanted to say so many things to her. Tell her how much she meant to me. How being around her had made me strong enough to consider adoption. I wanted to talk to her about being a woman; about everything I'd learned about fear, and vulnerability, and love. But then it dawned on me that I learned most of that from this place. And she would to. When the time was right.




Tribal Unity



I knew she'd grow up in this village the Hiki way. She'd have a child, find love and settle down, and grow old here. She'd be happy just like I'd been for my short stay in this place. I also knew I'd see her again. Rick and I hadn't discussed it, but I knew.

Christopher convinced the tribesmen to accept Rick's offer to help them invest their money. It didn't secure a place here for us or anything, especially since there are no certainties when it comes to investments, but it did tie us to them, and that was enough for Rick. I think part of the reason he wanted to help was so he had a reason to come back and visit. Being clients, and very substantial ones, I might add, made coming to the island a business trip.

The two women I first met hulling nangai nuts behind the dormitory were, in fact, the so-called lesbians of the tribe. I'd come to think of them as just really good friends who did each other 'favors' every once in awhile. I spent a lot of time with them. Even though we couldn't communicate verbally very well, I felt a kinship with them that was special. I found myself at their doorway many times, laughing over silly things that only women would understand.

There were a million stories about these people that had become a part of me. The oldest boy and girl in the dorm, now in their early teens, had managed to fall in love with one another. This caused some concern amongst the elders. From what I could gather, they were afraid that these two might be as closely related as half-siblings being as they were born nearly the same time. There wasn't any social stigma around this, of course, just a practical concern over the health of the offspring if they came to produce together. We wouldn't be around to see how they resolved this.

Their faces were familiar, and their individual lives were becoming my life, the more I embedded myself in the community. It was family in the truest sense of the word.

Rick clasped my hand in his as we paced toward the lagoon. It was bathing time, but that's not what we had in mind.

I stepped onto the cool stone and then sat quickly, scooping up a handful of water and throwing it at him, just like I'd seen the young woman do the week before. It was a scene we'd both played over in our minds several times. We'd been dying to replay it ourselves and wouldn't get the chance once we were back home.

Rick lowered himself over me and took my nipple between his lips roughly, opening his mouth wide to devour as much of my breast as he could. I mewled in response, arching my back to him. I briefly glanced at the bathers. They watched, a few with more than just a mild interest.

I'd come to realize, when I finally opened my eyes to this place, that these people were very sexual by nature. They played openly and watched shamelessly. I'd also come to realize something about myself. I liked being watched. It turned me on almost as much as being dominated. And when you combined both...

Rick abruptly removed his mouth from my breast and dipped his head between my splayed thighs. He moaned as he devoured my wet sex, sending vibrations into my flesh and ripples of excitement through my veins. My body hummed with pleasure as his tongue moved rapidly over my swollen clit. I bit my lip and held my breath. I was close. So close. Now I see how that girl climaxed so fast. Yeesh!

I clawed at Rick's shoulders to let him know I was about to come. He moved over me and plunged hard into my waiting opening. I couldn't hold it another second. I didn't need further stimulation; the penetration was enough. I yelped in surprise and then in complete ecstasy. Rick rocked his hips; pumping to a violent finish. We shuddered together in release, my inner walls clamping down over and over again around his spent cock. Perfect.

I cried like a baby on our last day. I couldn't help it. I'd come to love this place, these people, so much it hurt to let them go. As we were about to head to the beach, my dusty, unused makeup case in hand, my two friends and a few other women approached to send us off. I searched, but Rihann wasn't with them. She knew we were leaving. It would've just upset me more to see her at that point.

The elderly woman ambled through the group toward me and looked into my eyes. With Christopher standing there, it was my chance to ask her what she had tried to say to me the week before, but I wasn't sure I wanted to know. It didn't seem to matter, anymore. She smiled at me and then examined Rick up and down. She reached out, and I extended my hand to her but she swatted it away. I frowned, but a second later her hand came to rest on my abdomen. I tilted my head at her in question and she nodded in response. Then she smiled a large toothy grin.

I didn't need a translator.