0 comments/ 12215 views/ 0 favorites Tori Ch. 1 By: Tori Dylan Part I: Truth Fridays are no good for me, but come over Saturday... The radio played I knew I loved you before I met you as Kennedy smoked her Marlboro light and the rest of us was getting high. It's started as a truth or dare kind of thing where someone asked, after hearing rumors about what happened Friday night, if I loved Chris and it all just came out: I want to tell you something, something about me. I am sensitive and untrusting, which, I am sure, makes me an unbearable minefield at times. I keep most of me closed off and away from the public eye. And the parts I do show, they are minor to what I hide. So how is it that these New Kids on the Block groups sing songs that resonate in me? I kept only one door open to my heart ... I did not know that anyone could see it ... I settled for the comfort of someone "good" loving me instead of waiting for "the one" that I loved easily and completely. This is why it seems like I am looking for something, someone. I am. The idea that there was this "one" who would make me a better person because he saw me as I am, perfectly flawed. I would literally dream about the man with whom I had no fears. I could be as great or as little as I am without fear that I challenged his masculinity or humiliated him with my childishness. He had the imaginary arms I rested in at nights for years until I met Chris. Then, when my life got shattered, I brought "him" back to life. For a few hours a night, I dream of a better life with my someone else. Well, I got over the need to snuggle into an imaginary lover's arms - it was the day I saw him in real life. Here was my chance to gamble on me ... to risk the comfort of what I had for a man who may not want me. At once, I decided to have him. No guilt nor reason could be as powerful as my desire to be in his arms. They say around the way you ask for me, there is even talk about you wanting me - God that song make me want to dance - if it's true, don't leave me all alone down here, wonderin' if you ever going to take me there tell me pretty baby which way to go, tell me pretty baby cause I need to know - I need to know ..." Its 1 am and I warm a virtual stranger's body with mine as I close my eyes and I am kissing "his" lips in my mind. It is a cruel pain I have: I am healed simply by loving him in my mind. But, now that I know he is real; I am powerless to do or say anything. So I pour myself into my friends and the arms of other men so I won't think about him, call him, write to him, do anything that would betray the friend I said I was. He has trusted me, and I trust him. But I am a liar - I won't confess what is going on inside of me and just pull away. I never believe that the man I dreamt about was real, but he is, and I, I am driven out of my mind over him sometimes. I entertain myself with men that try to fill the void - but they are not the one. This is why I do what I do: because I broke my own heart when I committed myself to someone less. I got off work and still had Saturday and Sunday to do my lab report. I earned the right to go out. I wore my favorite black form-fitted jacket. The lines flow well over my curves. The gray satiny skirt rides just high enough to cover my behind when I get going on the dance floor. At first, I thought I would oil my legs and wear only the jacket, skirt and a bra. But Chris has a tendency to meet up with his friends at Gillian's now that I like the place, so I had to play it safe. Of course it is not like I am cheating on him since our commitment has dwindle to a monthly hour, mostly out of habit. Anyway, after thinking about it, I find the black teddy with the thigh stockings more fitting for my mood, but I still oiled my legs. Of course, I thought, if I do cash in a "credit" tonight, I had better do a full treatment. The feel of my smooth silky legs kind of turn me on so I decided to oil my entire body. My nails and lips match in the rich berry color and as a final touch, I removed the top button of my jacket. Then, right before I walked out, I called Shawn and told him I was going to the Club instead of Gillian's. Shawn was my safety net. The freebie I would take home if I could not find the one I wanted. Plus, I hated going alone. I always regretted it because there have been missed opportunities because of the safety net. But then, I don't know if could have gotten myself out of the bad situations without him. So I better choose wisely. The Club was loud and packed at 12:30. Shawn saw an old friend from college (who still dyed her hair platinum blonde) and shuffled her way. That was fine since Jay waved me over as soon as I looked his way. All I could think of is how much I hated moving to him and laughed at the fact that I was already saying no to him in my mind. "Hey," he said, kind of drawn out like he was well on his way to feeling just right. "Hello Jay." I like him better than any of the other guys that I usually dance with; he will let me say no all night. Of course, he makes me jealous when he starts rubbing on some "Barbie" because I won't kiss him back, but I can't get mad. I know tonight it will be different because whatever it is he is wearing smells delicious. I pulled the nearly full Bud Light from his hand and took two mouthfuls. I must have had a different expression on my face because he went from that small grin to kissing me without saying a word. After seeing him here over the last 2 months he finally got it - don't ask, just do it. I suppose most men don't because they are afraid of being slapped or sued, which is good. It saves women like me from getting into too much trouble, too soon. I don't want to sound like I can't say no - it's just most times, I really don't want to. Jay and I have our own little game we play - it something like "am I wearing panties?" His hands always play near the hem of my skirts. He must have loved the flat silky feeling of the teddy because his tongue came alive and long in my mouth and his fingers pressed into my bottom raising the gray cloth almost up to my waist. The small of my back was pressed against the edge of the bar as his knees bent so his mouth could suck soundly at my neck. I could feel the prickly sensation of a hickey forming in the pinch of skin he held in his mouth, but I could only make little throaty cries cause he had his leg dancing between my own. He grabbed my wrist and brought me near the center of the dance floor. I could feel the beat of the music pounding in my chest but my mind raced with the thoughts that I was finally going to have sex, even if it was not the one I dreamt about. (Then there was the issue of being faithful, not to Chris but the one I think I am in love with. I even spent a moment wondering it "he" would consider it cheating.) Jay kept me barely on the ground the whole time, I was either balanced on his thigh with only the tips of my shoes touching the ground or swinging around like a ragdoll with his arms hugging me around my waist. He never failed to kiss me between bringing rosy circles to the surface of my neck and shoulders and soon it seemed that the kisses rolled into one that last so long my mouth ached. His friends kept handing me beers and soon my jacket was somewhere under our feet and my skirt looked more like a large belt draped above my hips. I was almost afraid that he planned to sit me on the platform and fuck me right there. But luckily for my scant bit of remaining modesty, he had not fully recovered from drinking so much. However by 2 o'clock, he was ready to leave. I reached down to grab my jacket, which was soak. I walked through the crowd and past the security with only my teddy and skirt clothing me. His car was farther from the Club than mine, but I was too drunk to walk straight. It wouldn't matter because he never started the car. He opened the passenger door for me and pushed the seat back until I was lying flat. He crawled in on top me and closed the door. Our steam misted the windows while he pulled at the fasteners of my teddy. He contorted himself awkwardly to kiss my creamy wetness, but neither of us was comfortable in the cramped position. Jay rose and held himself up with one hand yanking at his pants with the other. I let him pull his zipper and then I grabbed both sides and pulled them down to his knees. He twined his free hand between my arms and pushed the black silk lingerie to my neck. He was quick to push himself into me while I tried to pull his shirt up... I wanted to feel his chest rub on mine. I should have thought about a condom but I hate them probably as much as men do. It was too late anyway. Plus, I was getting off just on the fact that it was spontaneous and passionate. His pale skin with the pale orange cast from the streetlight broken only by my brown arms and legs curled around him. I struggled to return his thrusts but it required more coordination than I had being this drunk. So I let him do to the hard work while I concentrated on holding the concentric muscles tight around his slick cock. His friends were talking and smoking at the hood of the car, one of them even sat on it - probably to try to slow the ferocious bouncing. There was a loud tap on the hood and he slowed down to a steady smooth grind. I was cumming a bit the whole time but now my pussy trembled and pulsed hard. Jay tried to pull away before he came but I felt the some of the hot semen jet into me and it set me off again. He took off his polo and gave me his tee shirt to dry myself on. I like to say that it was a wonderful experience but I was left in a bad position because his friends kind of acted like they were waiting in line and he had nothing to say about it. I found some napkins in a Taco Bell bag and was able to clean up and dress myself - opting to wear his tee-shirt over my teddy, tucking it tidily into my skirt. He did have the courtesy to walk me to my car, all the while telling me how beautiful I am and great that was. By the time I got to the car, I wished he didn't ruin my afterglow with a bunch of meaningless shit ... I could have gotten that at home. So I guess I never answered the question about being in love with Chris. I know it is because I hate to admit a mistake but I let the giddy effect of the pot work on my story and me while I wished that there was someone here for me. Tori Ch. 2 Part II: Sophomore I want to tell you about this 20 year-old "boy" in my Biology class. "I made up my mind -- there is no turning back she's been good to me, and she deserves better than that ..." the new century's rendition of New Kids on the Block sings about being faithful while I sit here beside you in your car. The cold rain is gently falling; and I shiver from the wetness on my skin. The silence has been but a moment but the line speaks volumes to my conscience. I did not tell you that I was married to keep you away; I told you so I would not be responsible for anything else I said or did to you. I purposely painted a picture of a wonderful home waiting for me to return. And I can tell that excites you ... you like the chase as much as I do, what a dangerous pair we are. TORI'S Thoughts: I always feel like you want to hug me. Maybe that is my projection; I want you to. I was happy in my quiet little world, but you starting this touching my hand thing and it was/is so cute and electrifying all the same. The first time you reached for my hand, I hesitated because I was afraid. Chris told me that I cannot be trusted. I doubt myself even you -- some young guy who will walk out of his way to avoid an ex-girlfriend on campus; a guy who would tell me about his first kiss at 12 ... my fear is so silly. My marriage with Chris is more out of habit than commitment and there is only my weakness that keeps me there. I think you would be fun for a while. If I could be myself, I would let you take me just for the fun of being your first older woman. I think you would work hard to please me. I hate the limbo of being in this gray place between acquaintances and lovers. That is not to imply that there is love involved. It's just that we are not really friends yet, however you have not earned the respect to be a man I would wrap my legs around. But... with the rain falling harder against the pavement...and we being so alone on the roof of the garage... and the fact that you just can't seem to put the car in reverse and you look like an abandon kitten with your dark hair still damp from the drizzle we ran through to get just this far ... "Help me," I say, as a work my jacket off my shoulders. You are quick to whisk of the offending piece of clothing. There, I have got you started, let's see what you do with the lead. "Do you want to go to my place so we can finish studying?" Dean asks, looking over his shoulder as he pulls out from the parking space. "I guess we should get at least this section nailed down," that was as close to a yes as I would give "as long as I get 6 hours of sleep, I will be fine for my 9 o'clock class." "I think we could this down by midnight, what do you think." I smiled and wondered if he was planning to do anything with the remaining 2 hours before my deadline. His shared condo was small construction site; he and his brother hung drywall the weekend past. Everything was in a neat arrangement, but we still had the maneuver to get to his bedroom. I immediately began to place obstacles around me: my books, papers and backpack, with my back to the runner of his bed. Dean went to the kitchen to grab "something other than water" as I requested and a beer for himself. I told him that I could not drive after a half of a beer even but he brought an empty glass " just in case" I wanted to try the dark beer he liked. He sat right beside me, as close as my pack would allow, with his beer on his right and the textbook on his lap. " I wanted to go over photosynthesis with you again," Dean said, "It seems like that is your weakest point. Then we can do enzymes." I tend to resist directions but he has not contested my need to be in control. In fact, he kind of says yes ma'am no matter what I say, so I agreed. I won't bore you with all of the interim stuff because we did get a lot of studying done that night. And I gave in a little around half past ten and drank some of his second beer. The headrush radiates through me and my whole body falls for the warm seduction of alcohol. The bitter thick beer scorches my tastebuds. It felt like smooth masculine hands down my chests, rolling over every curve losing itself around my abdomen. And I find that I am turned on that you are watching my reaction with it like it was some potent elixir. My skin is so receptive to your touch and I find myself instantly entertaining the fantasy that we were less "right" and more "wrong". I forgot to play coy and I kissed you. After all, that would tell me if you are the one ... for I still have the power to say no if you weren't. He was. I tend to take to kissing slowly. I like how it affects my impending orgasm -- for if I delay entry just long enough, even the waves of penetration will make me cum. But as much as he concedes while speaking to me, he is aggressive to ensure that I wouldn't flee. His arm flung out to push a space for us on the floor -- our notes shuffling together. Dean's mouth was warm and tasted sweeter than the beer, but there was something so incredible about his tongue. His talented lips spoke to me in this kiss: lie down and love it. His young hands worked against the pressure of his own chest as he pressed upon me while working at the eight small buttons. He licked at me like a treat. His eagerness showed in the careless random kisses he showered on me while he struggled to unfasten my bra. I tried to assist him, but in his frustration, Dean pushed away my hands. I felt the hooks give way to the pulling force and flushed hot with a bit of anger - he had certainly ruined my favorite cranberry bra. It was forgotten when that tongue of his went to work on my freed breasts. Dean nursed with a mouthful of my flesh with more talent than most; he even worked his hand under my skirt, stroking at my vagina with his fingertips. I have to admit that he was not the "boy" I thought he was. Dean had learned quite a few things before me and I was the grateful benefactor of his attention and affection. A few instances showed his newness. His patience was gone after his fight with the bra hooks so he tore my pantyhose to work his fingers on the soft moist flesh beneath. Yet, since is was out of eagerness instead of passion, he spent quite a while rasping his tongue against the nylon shield over my clit. For all of his aggression, I think he was too content, or too terrified, to undress himself and just fuck me. But at that point, that was all I wanted. I sat up and cupped his face, bring his wet lips to my face. I kissed him deeply while undoing his belt and zipper. I felt like a young girl, reaching into his boxerbriefs to release his hot firm cock from its hiding place. He was more thick than long, which is fine because as long as its hard, I can work with it. I wanted to taste the clear liquid at the tip of his swollen head but as soon as the air hit his shaft, his aggression came back and I was pushed to the floor again. Dean stoked his dick up and down on my vulva. Then arching back, he pressed full and hard into me. "Ahhhgd!" I was ready all this time but I wasn't at that moment - my muscles rippled and quivered, I could hardly breathe in without conscious thought. "Did you come already?" he asked, slowing a little but still thrusting with is face nestled against my ears. "Mmmmm, yes" I said, grind my hips to his, working my sensitive clitoris with my own fingers. The sound and scent of sex filled the room. And I was oblivious to everything until his cat's cold nose touched my arm. She had opened his door halfway so there was a perfect view of the hall and the door of Rick's, his brother, bedroom. Dean came quite a while after he entered me, but he did not go flaccid. He kissed me but gave no objections to lying on the floor beside me while my hands roved his skin. He laid at peace with eyes closed, his hands under his head, and a small smile on his lips. His eyes opened wide when my tongue began to play with his cock. His head was left without its palette when he placed his hands on my head, pressing me to continue. Long strokes from the tip until my bottom lip hugged against his testicles caused groans from his chest to rise and fall with his breath. As horny as I was, I did not want him to come this way. But what power does a young man have against me? I wanted to be in control - and with his precious flesh in my mouth, I was aware of the pleasure I gave and he received. He was adamant the first time my fingers played at his ass; moving his hips to avoid the most intimate contact. This, of course, made me all the more interested in doing it, though I approached the area indirectly. With his staff completely housed in my mouth, I swallowed repeatedly to tighten the grip around him. This freed my hands to caress his inner thighs and his jewels and occasionally rub the white curves of his underside. It was not long before I was drinking down his thick fluid while my fingertip pressed just a bit at his hidden pink star. I tried in vain to see his expression and had to settle with the satisfaction cues I could see, his toes writhing as an extension of his pleasure. "Dean," I said, "can you ..." I had no need to finish - he was already halfway there. This time, he outlasted me. I admit, I fell in love with the way he moved in me, on me but I got most excited when his brother came home and stopped to watch for a while before closing Dean's door. I was completely uninhibited and unashamed. I forgot everyone and everything and escaped to our pleasure island. At one point, I spun around and mounted his dick. I pumped my thighs and swayed my hips to bring his dick deep into my pussy. I pushed his head to my chest and ordered him to suck on my sensitive nipples. Not to be outdone, he held my hips and grind all of that thick cock deep within me. I found myself imaging Rick watching us and had another orgasm. My senses were so worked up from the beer, being seen, from just everything, including the damn cat that kept rubbing against our legs. His dick felt incredible sliding in and out of me. Somehow, he worked to have me kneel while he leaned over me with his chest tapping my ass and his testicles drumming at my clit. My nipples were teased with the sensation of the soft carpet. I moved countering his fucking rhythm so that every time he hit my g-spot it sent and pain-pleasure chill through me. I came harder than I did before, and held my muscles tight to get the fullest effect. Dean spasmed again inside me, but he did not lose his erection. I asked him if he wanted to continue but he said he probably could not come right now if we did, so we laid there. It was well after 4 in the morning and I wondered if I would just miss my first class or the whole day.