0 comments/ 13334 views/ 1 favorites Revisited By: katiekums It’s been almost three months since I’ve seen you. I’d be lying if I said I weren’t frustrated. I think of you often as I lay in bed trying to fall asleep. I remember the first night that we met. You were smiling at me across the bar. Every time I looked over at you I caught you looking at me. Or was it the other way around? After you bought me a few drinks and we talked for a while, we ended up standing outside of the bar, smoking a cigarette. Our conversation moved onto the subject of sex. I said something to you, flirtatious, being a bit of a tart, and you told me that I was driving you crazy. You told me how sexy I was. We moved together for a kiss. The first kiss. Electric. Feeling the heat of your breath on my skin as you kissed at my neck and my sensitive earlobes made me let out a soft moan. It only encouraged you more. You slipped your hands inside of my long coat and let them rest on my ass, touching me gently at first then with increasing pressure. Despite a few onlookers watching, our display became more intense. Our bodies pressed together, your hands, hidden by my coat, worked their way inside of my pants. I pushed my body closer to yours as I felt the warmth of your hands on my naked skin. I could feel your excitement as our bodies pressed together. In turn I became more excited, wanting to touch you, wanting to discover your body in more private surroundings. I told you to take me home. We started walking to your house. Through darkened empty streets, a little off kilter having had a few too many drinks, and wearing shoes with a bit too much of a lift, I was anticipating our arrival anxiously. We made a bit of small talk on the way, both cognizant of the fact that we were heading home with basically a perfect stranger, feeling a little tense or nervous, but also feeling the arousal of our previous interaction. We arrived at your door and made our way inside, careful not to disturb your sleeping roommates. I’m not sure how much of a concern that was later, but at least we tried initially. We made our way into your bedroom and I noticed that I was becoming increasingly aroused. I flushed as I remembered the feeling of your body pressing against mine only a little while earlier. You kissed me. I kissed you back. No longer having to hold back in front of the eyes of others we began taking more liberties with each other, exploring each other bodies and incidentally moving towards various states of undress. I couldn’t hold back any longer. As you caressed my breasts, sending shivers though me and gently taking them into your mouth, freeing them from their earlier constricted state, I knew that I had to touch you. As my hand ran down your bare chest and stomach I paused for a moment at your belt before letting my hand glide down to the hardness that was waiting for me below. You let me know that you wanted my touch and that I should continue. I wanted so badly to take you in my mouth right then and there, but you had other plans. We climbed up the ladder to the loft of your bed. As I lay back you moved on top of me, taking my face in your hands and kissing me deep and hard on the mouth. You kissed my ears and neck tenderly and I let out an audible sign of my enjoyment, moaning into your neck, tousling your hair with my fingers. As you directed your attention to my breasts , firmly grasping with your hands as your tongue danced across one nipple then the other, gently biting and suckling as you did, I knew I had to have you. I could feel the heat and wetness growing between my legs and spread my thighs apart allowing you to come between them. You repositioned your body atop of mine and I could feel your hardness growing against the warm sensations your body was causing in me. I wrapped my legs around you and felt the hardness of your cock pressing against me, frustrated that there was anything in between me feeling more of you, all of you. You seemed to sense this and shifted back, kissing my stomach lightly as you unbuttoned my pants. I raised my hips for you as you slid my pants off of my body, eager to help maneuver myself out of my clothing. I moved towards you and kissed you, pulling your body back towards mine. I smelled the deep musky scent of your excitement and shuddered. I buried my face in your neck and chest, kissing you, wanting to smell more of you, touch more of you. Your hand slipped down my stomach to my hips, lightly tracing the outline of my body, moving over my legs down to my knees and then finally up my thighs, moving closer and closer to your objective. My legs parted for you as I felt your fingers gracefully caressing the skin of my inner thighs. I felt one finger first, gently sliding up my outer lips. A superficial touch, a tease, cautiously avoiding moving too fast. But I wanted you. I wanted to feel you inside of me. I moved my hips towards your hand and you let your finger glide inside of me. I let out a deep moan and moved my hips toward your hand, wanting more of you inside of me. On cue, you rubbed your thumb against my clitoris sending shockwaves of pleasure through my body. I told you how good it felt, maybe not in words, but I let you know. I wanted more of you. You inserted another finger inside of me making me gasp with pleasure. As you moved your fingers in and out of me in tandem, you massaged my clit with your palm. Was that the very moment? Perhaps. I was yours for the taking. You turned me on so much. I told you that I wanted you in my mouth. Not yet, your movements seemed to say, as you traced your way slowly with your mouth down my breasts and stomach, halting just at my hips, kissing the sensitive skin on the front of my upper thighs. Your removed your fingers from inside of me and I almost cried out for you not to. You looked up at me once more, before lowering your head and in one swift movement taking me into your mouth. I was shocked at the sensations I was feeling and let out a startled moan. Your tongue seemed to envelope me completely in its warmth sending a rapturously pleasurable sensation through me, radiating outwards from the heat between my legs. You licked at my clit vigorously, alternately circling it with your tongue and taking it fully inside of your mouth sucking at it with the most delicious pressure. You told me how good I tasted, and I couldn’t help but move my hips toward you wanting more of your mouth on me, all over me. You slid a finger inside of me and then another as you lapped at my clit, sending me into a delirium, almost spasming with pleasure. The lustful groans emitted from my mouth were becoming increasingly louder and more urgent. I told you that I wanted you inside of me. You pushed your fingers deeper within me as you continued to lick and suck at my lips. You told me how wet I was, again how good I tasted to you. With my chest heaving and my breath catching I told you that I wanted you, badly. Moving to my knees I bent forward and took your erect cock in my hands. The contrast of the smoothness of your skin and the hardness of your erection was amazing to me. The heat coming off of you was incredibly sexy. I covered your thighs and stomach with light kisses, letting you feel my hot breath against your skin as I stroked your cock. With my mouth pressed against you, my tongue snaked up your shaft and lathed the head of your cock. Letting your cock slide into my mouth I suctioned my lips around you and brushed my tongue against the underside of your shaft. You moaned, felling the warmth and pressure of my mouth surrounding your cock and stroked my hair. I moved my mouth over your cock and sucked at you more deliberately. You placed your hands atop my head and guided your cock in and out of my mouth. I greedily sucked and licked at your cock wanting to give you the same pleasure you had given me. With increasing intensity and pressure I moved my lips all over the smooth skin of you hard dick. I flicked my tongue over the sensitive head and took the base of your cock in my hand stroking you as I sucked. You told me that you didn’t want to come yet. I slowed my pace a little until you gently pulled my head up from your cock. You moved back to your knees and reached for a condom to put it on, without being asked. I smiled, unable to hide my delight as you rolled the rubber down snugly on your hard cock. It was quite a sight to behold. I hadn’t anticipated the intensity of the raw desire you would bring out in me as I reached towards you and held your stiff cock in my hand. I leaned back and opened my legs for you pulling you gently towards me. With your cock in your hand you teased me, rubbing the head up and down against my clitoris, swirling my own wetness around. I felt the head of your cock just against my opening, I moved towards you , but you moved away too quickly. Did you want me to beg for it? I would have. I told you again that I wanted you inside of me, deep inside of me. Looking intently into my eyes you thrust your hips toward me and your cock pushed its way inside of me, slowly, torturously, one inch at a time. My back arched and you took my breasts in your mouth and hands. I moaned at the feeling of you filling me so completely, your hard cock now deeply inside of me. You withdrew slowly, feeling the hardness of your dick against the heat and wetness of my inner walls, I groaned again, not wanting the sensation of fullness-the feeling of you inside of me to dissipate. With that you thrust your cock into me deeply, urgently, letting me feel your entire length. Just as quickly you withdrew, pausing for a moment before thrusting your cock deep inside of me again. I gasped at the pressure, the sensations you were creating inside of me were intensely pleasurable, if not a little painful. The size of you cock-the length-the thickness-and the incredible hardness were almost too much for me to bear. But I loved it. I wanted more. As you began thrusting into me more rhythmically, pistoning your hard cock in and out of me, I grabbed your ass and pulled you further into me. You let out a deep groan and continued fucking me, gradually increasing the intensity and pressure of each movement. You moved my leg, having been wrapped around your waist, and positioned it upwards, my ankle resting on your shoulder. You pushed inside of me and I felt you to a depth I hadn’t even imagined. My breath coming harder and harder, feeling almost paralyzed with the intensity of your big cock so deeply and utterly inside of me, I let out a series of short gasping sounds. You pumped your cock into me faster, harder-watching my face as you did, reading my expressions and smiling down at me. My leg slipped down and joined the other at your waist. Crossing my ankles around your lower back, I enjoyed the pressure of your body rubbing against my clit as you fucked me hard. My hands moved down your back, scratching at the skin, until stopping at your ass. Holding my hands still for a moment, enjoying the feeling of your well muscled ass pushing against my body, I thrust my hips toward you. I grabbed your ass now, digging my fingers into the soft flesh as I met each thrust of your with my own. I asked if you could feel how wet I was. Your response was a deep guttural “UNGH”. It turned me on so much to hear your voice. I asked if it felt good. You acknowledged my question with a groan. I pushed you away a bit, my fingers caressing your chest as I did, and told you that I wanted to be on top. You acquiesced and moved away, repositioning yourself on your back. I straddled you and took your cock in my hand, slick with my own wetness. I placed the head of your cock near my opening and you pushed upwards inside of me. I loved the way your cock felt inside of me-so impossibly hard, so big. I moved against your cock, feeling the shape and size of you against my walls as I moved forward and back. I asked if you wanted me to come. You did. I moved my hand towards my clit and touched myself, my skin so hot and wet. I described circular motions on my clit, my fingers lightly dancing over the folds of my sex. You thrust up towards me as I rubbed at my clit and I started moving more rhythmically against you. I found it impossible to silence myself as I felt your hard dick, deep inside of me, creating an intensity of feeling I didn’t want to end. I started fucking you in earnest now, leaning back a bit, my hips swaying against your own, thrusting my pussy towards you, rubbing my clit faster, harder. You told me that you wanted me to come. I wanted to come. I wanted to come with you deep inside of me, fucking your cock as I pleasured myself. I told you that I would-that I’d come for you-that you were making me come. A flood of sensations coursed through my body causing me to shake and shudder as I rode atop your huge cock to my own orgasm. Breathless, sweaty, swearing and moaning I came on top of you. You could feel the constrictions of my muscles around your cock, as if my cunt were grabbing for your cock and squeezing you. I moved off of you and lay beside you on the bed. I asked you to take me from behind. You eagerly pulled at my hips as I bent down on all fours for you. Your cock slid inside of me smoothly as I was so wet. I could hear the sound of your body slapping against my ass with every thrust. I could feels your balls against my clit every time you pushed inside of me. You reached around and rubbed my clit as you fucked me from behind. I felt like I was still coming. I told you how good it felt-how I wanted you to fuck me harder-how I wanted you to fuck me until you came inside of me. Hearing the sound of your breath, labored with your efforts, and the sounds of your own pleasure coming from you mouth set me off. I pushed back with my hips to meet your thrusting cock, until I felt you pause, shudder, and push your cock so deeply inside of me I knew you must be coming. As you held your cock deeply in place I pushed against you, wanting you to feel me tightly all around you. You sighed as you withdrew from inside of me and we lay next to each other on your bed, sweaty, breathless, and spent. You took me in your arms and let out an endearing chuckle, “Whew!”, you said. I could only agree. So now as I sit here alone replaying the events of our first meeting, my body remembering the sensations of your touch, nine hours away from you in another city, I wonder when I’ll see you again. Wondering when I’ll feel your mouth on mine, your hands on my body, your hardness inside of me. I want you. I crave you. I’ll be seeing you soon. Revisited This is a very dark little opus, and fairly short vs what I had originally conceived. (For those of you concerned with such things, I get a lot of inspiration from dreams and those just-before-sleep / just-before-waking periods. This is in Loving Wives because that's where many such stories go; but, it has an exceptionally strong Fantasy component. If time travel or general fantasy are not turn-ons, please skip. Also: Not an homage to Papatoad; but influenced? Yeah, prolly. I awoke slowly, processing the tableau. I was in bed; I felt young; there was someone in the bed with me. Remembrance seeped into my consciousness. I smiled at the thought: It was the morning after my wedding. My newlywed wife, Sherry, was laying beside me. I glanced over at her pale skin, placed a finger to her neck, and smiled even more broadly. I reached for the phone. ++++++ (Twenty years earlier) I reached for the phone. Its shrill insistence had roused me from a light nap. I glanced at the Caller ID, and cursed. I knew what was in store. I picked up the handset. "Hello?" I lied. "You're late again, asshole." Yep, my bitch ex-wife. I had harbored a vague hope it might be one of my two sons. Fat chance: they hated me more than their mother did. As if that was possible. "I'm two days late. It's not an emergency for you, and we both know it." "I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!" she shrieked. "You're gonna pay me that pissant little two hundred a month, whether you like it or not!" "You have plenty. Why don't you and Screwer just get married and leave me alone?" I was getting hot, though I knew what was coming. "None of your goddamned business what STEWART and I do. Learn to pronounce his name for a change, shit-for-brains." "I know how to pronounce your names. Scary Sherry and Stewart the Screwer." I recognized the complete lack of decent rhyme scheme; I just loved to steam her. "Just send the goddamned money NOW!" she screeched, and hung up. Loudly. Clearly, a land-line with handset. I stared at my iPhone, wondering (very briefly) why Steve Jobs had not preminisced the need for such an attachment to his signature creation. Then, I stared at my surroundings. I lived in a small (and I do mean small) condominium, two bedrooms, one bath, purchased before I met Scary Sherry (and thus a non-marital asset), the stairs being my sole source of exercise. Not a bad place to live; but at this point in my life (and career) I should have been doing much better. I sat down in my recliner, a worn but trustworthy souvenir of my bachelor days, put my head back, and started a small pity-party. ++++++ I'd been out of school for three years when I met Sherry. Bachelor's in Accounting, good job, nice little condo, saving money left and right, just about to sit for the CPA. Life wasn't just good: it was sweeeet. Then I met Sherry. In retrospect, she was strictly take-no-prisoners. She pursued me with a righteous fire. She WAS going to get on my motherfuckin' gravy train, so there. Within a year we were married and expecting. No, she didn't conceive until after the wedding, unless kids take fifteen months to gestate. We were doing okay, I thought, until the birth of our first child; and then, the drumbeat began. New house, new house, new house. New car, new car, new car. New... well, you get it. A couple years later, I'd knuckled under to most of her pronouncements, and we had another little boy. Throughout the kids' younger years, there were few waves. Once they started middle school, things changed. I was oblivious, of course. Not everyone was, though. Don and Sheila, mutual friends, tried to drop hints. Phil and Susan, another set of close friends, confronted me directly. I was being stepped out on. Cheated on. Cuckolded. I dismissed most of it; but as the days and weeks and months rolled past, I began to see our friends were right. Something was going on. Right after our seventeenth anniversary, an event marked by chilly relations and no warmth, she announced to me she'd fallen in love with someone else. Don and Sheila were direct in their scolding; Phil and Susan less so, but still angry with both of us. Scary Sherry slapped me with a restraining order and served me with divorce papers, and then moved her lover in with her. It all happened so fast, I couldn't make head or tail of it. Not at that moment. ++++++ The judge was very sympathetic to me. She grilled Scary Sherry and Stewart the Screwer (as I'd taken to calling them) about their extramarital activities. The pair were smug as they blamed me for everything under the sun; Judge Kosar sliced up their arguments, and while she admitted I would have to pay the mortgage on the house, and child support for the children "everyone assumed were mine" (her words -- that got a spray of invectives from Scary Sherry, which earned her three days for contempt), I would have to pay my beloved ex two hundred dollars a month alimony. (More invectives, three more days in contempt) ++++++ And so life went on. I sat in that comfy chair, and felt sorry for myself. And then everything went white. ++++++ I thought I was dead. I'd felt no pain, I'd experienced no transition. I was simply sitting, and everything around me was white. No, check that: colorless. Not clear, but just... nothing. So this is death, I thought. I looked around; seeing nothing, and enjoying the seat, I just, well, sat. At length, a figure approached. Nothing discernible, just a figure. It sat across from me, where I do not know. "Tired of this shit?" I heard. I nodded. A hand reached toward me, proffering a vial. I took it. It contained one pill. "It's all she'll need," came the voice. ++++++ Twenty years earlier I was awake, again, in my honeymoon suite. The water was running in the bathroom. I remembered: Sherry had taken a bath, solo, before presenting her non-virgin pussy to me. We'd never had sex -- I'd honored her wishes, to inaugurate one another on our wedding night -- and she proclaimed a desire to present herself clean to her husband. I looked at the nightstand. There was a vial, with a single pill. I debated for a microsecond before I extracted the pill. As I recalled, we'd toasted one another with small glasses of -- you guessed it -- sherry. I dropped the pill into hers. It vanished immediately. At length she emerged; we toasted one another with the sherry, and then went through the gyrations of a wedding night. We fell into an intense slumber. ++++++ I awoke slowly, not exactly sure if I had been dreaming; and then my senses kicked in. My newlywed wife, Sherry, was laying beside me. I glanced over at her pale skin, placed a finger to her neck, and smiled even more broadly. I reached for the phone. "Please hurry! My wife isn't moving." I gave more information, and then settled back. I grinned and dressed. I needed to find a new wife. Revisited Ch. 02 I hadn’t seen him since our first meeting, now two months past. He was scheduled to play a show in a nearby city, only two hours away form where I lived. He played in a honky-tonk band, not exactly my cup of tea, but I wanted to see him. He had sent me emails fairly regularly and called every so often. Honestly I hadn’t ever expected to hear from him, I figured our first night together was a one time thing. After all, he lived in northern California, and I, in southern California. We had met while I was vacationing, visiting a friend in the area. I was excited to see him, we had discussed that I’d likely stay overnight after going to the concert rather than driving the two hours home late that night. As the date approached I started feeling anxious. Would it be uncomfortable to see him? Would I still be attracted to him? Would he still be attracted to me? I tried to calm myself down a bit, but I was definitely on edge the few days preceding our meeting. I was also incredibly horny. I had replayed that night that we had spent together over and over in my head. I would get wet just thinking about him. He was a good deal older than me at 41. Let’s see, I’m 25, so that puts us at about 16 years apart. He wasn’t the first older man that I had slept with, but quite arguably the best. I don’t know if it was his sexual prowess in particular, the chemistry between us, or just his overall enthusiasm and energy, but the sex that we had that first night that I met him was spectacular. So as the day finally arrived, a mild southern California day in June, I readied myself. My anticipation and anxiety were high as I got on the 5 and drove north to meet him. After two hours of driving, reminding myself of the feeling of his strong arms around me, his chest, so masculine and sexy, the feeling of his hands and his tongue on my body, and his scent, intoxicating and musky, I was definitely in a state of arousal. I arrived at the bar, made my way inside and ordered a beer. I scanned the bar looking for him. There he was, dressed in full cowboy regalia. I hadn’t seen him like this before. Yes, he wore boots and jeans when I had met him initially, but here he was in boots, jeans, a cowboy hat and retro western shirt. He looked cute as hell. I walked up behind him and gave him a tap on the shoulder. He turned around and gave a big, surprised grin. “Hey! I’m so glad you could make it!” he told me as he opened his arms for a hug. I told him that I wouldn’t have missed it, and that it was nice to see him. We embraced for a friendly hug and when we separated he patted my back, nervously, I thought. He introduced me to some friends and then left me to socialize on my own while he was setting up. The music started soon enough and the bar, dimly lit, became smoky. Kind of sexy really, being in a dive bar in the middle of God knows where in Orange County, watching the man I was going to have sex with perform. And he was sexy on stage. I felt myself blush a little as I realized that I actually liked the music and enjoyed watching him up there, thinking to myself, “Yep, I’m gonna fuck him later.” I was drunk now. Sensuous, I guess, is the best way to describe my feeling in my surroundings. The music, the energy of the crowded room, tasting the beer on my own breath, I was very turned on. After his set had ended, he approached me and bought us a drink. He was sweaty and vibrant and had an air about him of confidence and satisfaction. We chatted for a bit, becoming a little more comfortable with the idea of being in the same room together again and got up to go watch the next band. He tried to get me to dance. I don’t dance. He tried harder. Really, I don’t dance. Ok, he managed to kind of, sort of, get me to move around just a little bit to the music. It was loud. We had to lean in to each other and practically put our mouths up to each other’s ears to be heard. Every time he spoke to me I could feel his breath on my exposed neck. Every time I leaned in to say something to him I was overwhelmed by his sexy scent. I was heating up, I wanted him to make a move on me. He seemed a little nervous to me, like he wasn’t sure what was appropriate or not. He leaned in again to say something to me, his hot breath on my skin, steamy and sensual, and I gave him a delicate peck on the cheek. He let his hand slip down to my lower back and let out a sigh of relief. “Whew! That was a lot easier.” he said to me with a smile. I placed my hand lightly on his chest and leaned into him, “Well what did you think? Why did you think I came up here?” I asked with a mischievous grin. “Well…I don’t know….you can’t always be sure…” he shrugged. I found it endearing that he had been nervous about whether I would be interested in him or not. I had felt the same anxiety earlier, only having reduced it with a few drinks, was a bit more bold. We became more intimate as the night went on. Our touches became teasing as I let my lips graze against his ear as I leaned in close to say something to him. His hands reached around my waist and would lay gently on my lower back lightly touching my bottom now and then. “I can’t wait to get out of here and take you home” I told him with a conspiratorial look. “Or to the Motel, you mean?” he responded with a light kiss on the mouth. We got directions to the motel where they had booked a few rooms and started getting ready to leave. It seemed to take forever, and in all honesty it did take a long time to get out of there. What with packing up, saying goodbyes and thanks to everyone it seemed like we’d never get out of there and back to the privacy of the room. Finally we got into my car and started heading towards the interstate. We weren’t completely sure how to get to the motel, and both pretty inebriated. I really shouldn’t have been driving, but the motel was supposed to be very close by. He let his outstretched hand lay on my thigh as I entered the on-ramp. His touch sent shivers of excitement through me and I could feel the wetness already in between my legs. Unfortunately, I had tell him that I couldn’t concentrate very well on driving while he was doing that to me, and it would be best if we could wait until we got to the room. Until we go to the room-when exactly would that be? We were lost, in denial, but definitely lost. The directions we had gotten were sketchy at best and the 5 had been under construction which made for a confusing, if not frustrating drive. I continued to drive around on unfamiliar on-ramps and off-ramps trying to negotiate through traffic and find the motel. Frustrated and tired, we pulled over. He started arguing with me about getting lost. I was a bit taken back as I couldn’t really see us arguing or him being upset with me as we had only really met each other once before. I was upset by this and tried to get him to calm down. He was frustrated and tired and we continued bickering while I found my way back to the highway. Within five minutes I had found the correct exit and we located the motel. Relief, right? Not necessarily. Now I was pissed. My feelings were hurt that he had raised his voice at me and I didn’t particularly feel like sleeping with him, let alone being in the same room with him. What was I going to do? I thought about it quickly while parking the car. I could get my own room, probably get into argument with him and never talk to him again. Or, I could blow it off, against my better judgment, go inside with him and have the hot, passionate sex I had been fantasizing about for weeks. I don’t know if it was my drunken state of mind or the fact that he already made me so wet, but I opted for the latter of the two. We went into the room, small and simple, but clean, and looked around. We both relaxed, the tension of trying to find the room having dissipated. After a few minutes we found our way into each others arms and shared a kiss. I could feel my desire for him rising and his desire for me was rising also, rather obviously. Without any pretense I began removing my clothes and grabbing at his. We hurriedly took off our shoes and any remaining articles of clothing that had managed to stay put in our hurried undress. There he was. Naked. Me too. We embraced again, a full body embrace. Feeling his nude body pressed against mine as his hands ran over my lower back to my bare ass while he softly kissed my neck and shoulders, made me moan with pleasure. He was very aroused also. I could feel the hardness and the heat of his cock pressing against my stomach as he held me tighter in his arms. I wanted him so badly right then. My only objective was feeling him all over me, inside of me. I felt his growing cock in may hands, the skin so smooth and soft, contrasting with the stiffness of his erection. I kissed him on the mouth, then moved my lips over his neck to his shoulders. Our tongues were in a flurry over each other, kissing, licking, and gently biting at each other’s erogenous zones. I loved the way that his mouth felt on my body. He seemed to know exactly what to do to me to drive me crazy - he seemed to anticipate my desires. As I stroked his cock in my hand against my stomach he separated a bit from the embrace and took one of my breasts into his mouth. He suckled at my hardened nipple with the most delicious pressure while flicking his tongue over the sensitive area. I moaned my appreciation at his attention to my breasts as he fondled and caressed my breasts together, alternately taking each into his mouth. I wanted to taste him. Placing my arms around him I traced small circles with my fingernails on his back as I dropped to my knees, my tongue lashing at his chest and stomach on the way down. My mouth was now very close to the heat of his erection as I kissed at his thighs and belly, gently, tauntingly. He moaned in anticipation of what was likely to come and pressed his body against me. “Mmm…” I groaned, licking my lips at the realization of what I was about to do. My tongue snaked out and washed up his thick shaft, lathing the sensitive head of his throbbing cock in the warmth and wetness of my mouth. He shuddered at the sensation. His excitement turned me on so much, it gave me a feeling of control, knowing that I was responsible for giving him such pleasure. I took his shaft in my hand at the base and continued gliding my tongue over his hardness. He reached for my shoulders and gave an insistent caress. I placed my lips on the head of his cock and eased him into my mouth slowly, inch by inch. His hands settled on my head, stroking my hair and holding back from what he likely want to do, to push his cock further into my waiting mouth. He let out a groan of satisfaction as he felt the pressure of my lips surrounding him tightly as my tongue slid up and down his cock. I moaned with him in my mouth sending a shiver through his tense body, his hips thrusting towards me. He fondled my breasts while I sucked him off, pinching at my erect nipples, eliciting vocalizations from my mouth, filled with his hard cock. He told me how good it felt, my mouth all over him. And I wanted to make him feel good. I wanted to make him come for me. I wanted for him to come in mouth while I sucked his cock. I increased the pressure of my mouth around his dick, sucking him in so that my cheeks became hollowed, and with my hands firmly gripping his ass, pulled his body closer to mine, forcing more of him into my mouth. He began to ease his cock in and out of my mouth, pushing his hips toward my face as I kneeled in front of him, his hands placed on either side of my head, helping to guide my mouth toward him. The signs of his pleasure were growing, with his chest rising as I gazed up at him, showing him my tongue moving lightly over his cock. His respiration was increasing and the sound of his fragmented breath made me suck at him faster, harder. I knew that he was going to come. The thought of him coming in my mouth while I licked and sucked at him, hungry for his cock, made me shudder with desire. I could feel the pressure building in him as his hard cock throbbed and twitched in my hand and mouth. With an urgent groan, he paused, his cock thrust into my mouth to the hilt, and unloaded. I felt the hot splash of his come on my tongue - God, he tasted so good to me - and then all over my chest as I continued to stroke him through his climax. He shot all over my breasts and I could feel the heat of his come sear my tender skin, in the most erotic way. I bathed his cock with my tongue, leaving soft kisses all over him and gently suckling until the pressure was too great, his cock so sensitive that he moved away from my touch. He pulled me to him and we collapsed on the bed together out of breath, but not spent. He lay his head down on my chest and ran his fingers through my hair, as I placed sweet pecks on his forehead. He began massaging one of my breasts as he turned his head to take the other into his mouth. I arched my back pushing more of myself into his mouth. The velvety feeling of his tongue passing over my breasts, the engorged nipples-so erect-and the sensitive aureole made me instinctively open my legs for him. On cue he traced the outline of my hips with his fingers down to my thighs describing tiny circles as he did. I felt my heart rate rising as he moved his hand up my thigh towards the wetness that he had created in me. I moved my hips towards him as I whispered breathlessly to him, “I want you.” A long finger moved across my outer lips, just lightly brushing the skin. I felt the same finger now moving slowly down, parting the labia, rubbing tantalizingly, if only too briefly, over my clitoris. I grasped his free hand firmly and placed it upon my breast, now heaving with the excitation he was causing. I felt the tip of his finger rubbing against my opening, gently probing me, exploring my skin. He seemed to release the moisture that had been my response to his touch, as I know suddenly felt very wet. He moved two fingers over me now, incidentally distributing the natural lubrication over my clitoris readying me for whatever was to come next. With his palm pressing against my rising clit he inserted a finger inside of me. I gasped at the sensation of his finger penetrating me, feeling the shape and size of it against my slick inner walls. “Oh God, it feels so good” I told him as he slipped another finger inside of me filling me further. He moved his fingers in and out of me caressing my sensitive spots, creating a feeling of pressure and fullness that was absolutely intoxicating. “It’s my turn now” he said as he lowered his head between my thighs which were spread for him invitingly. I moaned and thrust my pelvis towards him as I felt the first lash of his tongue over my steaming cunt. He licked at my clit and my inner lips with a deliberate sensuality that made me smolder. I couldn’t believe that it could feel this good. I would have done anything to make him keep going. However, I didn’t have too. He seemed to have a genuine enthusiasm and the stamina to pleasure me without hesitation or relief. He moved his fingers inside of me as he lapped vigorously at my clit causing muscles to tense and spasm as I gave myself to him. Largely forgetting any feelings of discomfort or vulnerability at this most intimate gesture, I gave myself over to the feelings I was experiencing and closed my eyes. His tongue seemed to move over me like water, creating a rapturously pleasurable sensation in me which radiated outwards from my core. I cried out to him again and again-it felt so heavenly- I wanted him to know how amazing it was. I thrust my hips towards him offering more of myself to him. He was impossibly sexy, tasting my essence as I opened my eyes and looked down upon him, his head buried between my legs. “I want you. I want you inside of me” I seemed to plead. He refocused the attention of his mouth onto my breasts as he moved his body up mine and lay between my parted legs. I could feel his cock, so hard again, pressing against my wetness. He rubbed the head of his cock against my clit causing me to raise my hips up against him. He moved to his knees, grabbed a condom, quickly discarding the wrapper and placed the condom on the head of cock. I leaned forward and rolled the rubber down his thick shaft, a snug fit. I reclined and offered myself to him again, gently placing my ankles around his waist and drawing him towards me. The feeling of his flesh on my flesh, the weight of his body atop mine as he placed his sheathed member directly up against me was pure desire. As he entered me, he kissed me deeply on the mouth, our tongues intertwined, our hands finding each other and grasping urgently. He pushed inside of me, deeper and deeper to the core of me until I could feel almost his entire length. All I could do was say yes. “Yeah…yes,” I moaned. “Oh…..yes….God….,” I practically slurred as I was overtaken with the emotion and feeling of him being so deeply inside of me. With my hands in his he pulled my arms just above my head and held them there, as he began to move deep inside of me and then withdraw slowly. Putting me in a state of utter ecstasy he increased the speed and intensity of his movements as he thrust into me again, withdrawing and penetrating, more urgently, more emphatically. My body was on fire as I moved to grind my hips against him, his body rubbing against my clit, thrilling me, satisfying me. “I want you to come” he told me as he worked my body into what as quickly becoming a frenzied state. “Let me” I responded as I motioned for him to roll over onto his back and let me be on top. He took his time, and we both savored it. He labored above me as I passively enjoyed his pursuit that drove him deeper inside me with every stroke. We separated for the briefest of moments as he rolled over for me to take my position on top. I straddled him and placed his hardened cock, slick with my own wetness, near my entrance. He raised his hips towards me, his cock gliding inside of me, my walls constricting around him, hugging him tightly. With a twinge of pain I moved to control the penetration. His cock - so large and hard - so deep inside of me was almost too much to bear. I became more comfortable and the motion of my hips allowed me to take him deeper inside of me with every movement. My back arched as I pressed down against him and offered my breasts to his waiting mouth. He manipulated my breasts, teasing me with his mouth and fingers, working me into a state of extreme excitement as I rode atop his hard cock. “Do you want me to come?” I asked as I straightened my body upright, straddled proudly on top of him. “Yes,” which was all I need to hear. My finger moved towards my tender clit, eager to assuage the longing-the necessity to move towards climax that he inspired in me. I rubbed my clit, gently stoking the soft folds of skin feeling the passion and urgency of my own touch. I drove my hips against his experiencing the sensation of his cock filling me so entirely, so pleasurably. He met each thrust of mine with his own and soon we were caught in an unbreakable rhythm, with me moving closer to orgasm, steadily rubbing my at my clit, moaning with the ecstasy of fulfillment. I don’t know precisely what happened then or how it happened, but I suddenly felt compelled to vocalize my lust. “Fuck me” I demanded of him, as if he weren’t already busy doing just that. Indeed he was, I just liked the sound of the words-the way they felt as they rolled off of my tongue. “God, I love the way you fuck me,” I told him as he continued to push up into me driving his cock deep inside of me. “I’m such a slut. I’m such a slut for your cock” I hissed at him as I drove my hips to meet his with renewed intensity. Revisited Ch. 02 I registered a look of shock and surprise on his face at my debauchery- the virtual slew of profanity escaping my mouth. “Tell me…tell me what a slut I am” I asked of him. “I’m such a horny little slut...I need to be fucked…Fuck me…Yeah…Fuck me…” I continued. Apparently, feeling a bit uncomfortable in response to my dialogue, he chose not to respond. But I was drunk and in an incredibly heightened state of arousal, and as such, not particularly observant. “I’m gonna come…I’m gonna fuck you until I come…I’m such a slut for you…” I went on. I felt the familiar contractions of my muscles as the beginning of my orgasm overtook me - a mass of neurons firing, blood circulating, muscles spasming, and limbs only lightly tethered to my body. The intensity of my climax however, was rather unfamiliar. “I’m coming…Oh, God, I’m COMING” I announced to him as I felt the waves of my orgasm rise to a crest and come crashing down over my body. “Ah…Ungh…Ahh..” I moaned as I gleaned the sensation of my climax to its last moment. With a few aftershocks I collapsed on top of his chest, breathless and shaking at the force and intensity of my release. He took me in his arms, planted an affectionate kiss on my mouth and we both shuddered with the delight of my satisfaction. We rolled over as he assumed the position of being on top. Every movement he made sent shivers throughout my body eliciting what felt like miniature orgasms repeating themselves. I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him closer to me, feeling the heat of his breath on my neck, his chest pressed firmly against mine, my nipples grazing his skin with every motion. He moved my ankles up to his shoulders, letting them rest there as he penetrated me deeply, allowing me to feel his full length as his strokes became piston-like. Each thrust of his coaxed a breathless gasping sound from my mouth. The pleasure was excessive, I felt out of control, and completely within his. My legs found their way back down to the bed and hugged his hips as he thrust into me. I scratched my fingernails down his back and came to the musculature of his ass. His firm, sexy ass, pumping against me, into me-God, it turned me on- I grabbed him, my fingers digging into the smooth flesh of his bare ass, and pulled him towards me, deeper inside of me. He groaned and drove himself deeper inside of me, driving his cock into me for all he was worth. He was rapidly approaching orgasm, his movements propelling him towards the plateau he was seeking. I felt him shudder as he pushed into me, pausing, his cock deep inside of me as he felt his release coming, a flood of relief as he felt himself unloading his passion deep into my core. I held him tightly inside of me, my walls still constricting around him, my hands firmly placed on his ass grinding him against me. He shifted his weight off of my chest and onto a nearby pillow while he remained inside of me, our legs tangled beneath us. As our breathing subsided and we looked at each other, entangled and connected, I couldn’t help but smile. “Whew,” he sighed. “Whew,” I could only agree. Revisited: Red Riding Hood Once upon a time... Three massive wolves stalked through the village streets, growling and snapping at the frightened citizens that dared peer through their windows. A young beggar ran across the street and the largest wolf, wind rushing through the shining black fur, pounced, pinning him with one large paw and leaning his head down, tearing out the young boy's throat. He let out a howl and his companions joined him, howling up at the moon, full above them. The eldest of the three, who was as black as his nephew, though the smooth fur bore streaks of silver, paused, lowering his gaze to a young woman who stood calmly in the middle of the street. A long hooded cloak of vibrant red silk hung from her slender frame and beneath the hood the wolves caught glimpses of soft blonde curls and blue eyes, dark as the sky above. She stepped back and they stalked closer, sniffing curiously. "Creatures of the fullest moon, great wolves, I offer myself, my body in exchange for the safety of my village," she called to the three. The third wolf, a handsome brunette, growled, offering a wolfish grin to his pack mates. They seemed to converse among themselves for a moment before approaching the girl. She led them through the village and into the woods, towards a clearing marked by herself and her mother the evening before. Her back never faced them, for she had memorized the route long ago. The alpha stepped forwards, gaze sweeping over the attractive female. She slipped the cloak off, letting the golden waves tumble over her shoulders, almost to her waist. Her lithe frame bore no other cloth, exposed for their pleasure. They circled her slowly and then the brunette nudged his head between her legs, knocking her back against the elder who lay down slowly, lowering her to the ground. She lay there watching as they shifted to the typical appearance of their kind, human in stature, animal in appearance with muzzles and tails still apparent. The three stood over her, growling and snarling, though not in threat, simply in warning, for she knew what was to come. The alpha took her first, thrusting his hardened length deep within her, claws tearing across the tender flesh of her back. He was delighted to see her enjoying it, eyes closed as she clung to him, legs wrapped as well as they could around his waist. He thrust into her a few more times before jerking out to spray his load across her nude body, howling, his body shaking as more and more left him to coat her pale flesh. He collapsed atop her, licking her chest clean before moving aside to allow the elder his turn. The graying wolf was gentler with their gift, one furry hand pinning her wrists above her head, while the other moved carefully over her exposed breasts, the nipples standing proudly at attention as soon as he touched them. A proud erection poked out of his sheath and he guided it to her entrance, thrusting his hips forwards to penetrate her, his gentle pace the complete opposite of his nephew. He licked her neck as he moved within her, drawing soft gasps and sighs from the full lips. They seemed to inspire the alpha, who promptly moved above her head, offering his already stiffening length to her lips. She accepted eagerly, drawing him into her mouth. He gripped her hair as she suckled gently upon him, watching the elder move his own shaft within this strange girl. Growing impatient, he began to thrust into her mouth, pre-cum oozing into her throat. She swallowed what she could, nearly choking when both he and his uncle came at the same time, filling her mouth and her womb with the thick white cream. They moved away from her, thinking at first that she'd be exhausted, but the girl instead eyed the brunette. "Bet you'd like me on all fours," she breathed, her voice carrying a sultry tone. The wolf moved forwards as she shifted to her hands and knees. He moved behind her and gripped her hips tightly as he guided his excited man (wolf?) hood towards her entrance. But then he stopped, moving one hand to rub gently at her slit, the juices slick on his fingers. He moved the fingers to the puckered asshole and rubbed the liquid over it. She attempted to crawl away, but he jerked her back towards him, entering her tiny rear in one smooth motion. He seemed to enjoy the cry that passed through her lips, for he pulled back until the tip teased the edge of her hole, then pushed back in, his claws ripping deep gashes in her hips. Picking up a steady rhythm, he slammed in and out of her, listening as the pained cries turned into excited moans and soon enough, the girl was pushing back against him. He reached down and brushed a single claw over her clit. It was enough to push her to climax, the slender body shuddering and jerking beneath him. As her ass clenched around his length, he tensed, then let loose a yowl as he unloaded into her. The wolves cleaned each other and left, leaving the girl shivering in the middle of the clearing, covered in their semen and deeply satisfied. Revisited: Red Riding Hood She hadn't come to him. Lord Dumont snarled, sitting back on his haunches as he tore away at the old man beneath his paw, fingers catching in his intestines as he pulled them out and threw them aside, dropping his head to bite at the man's insides hungrily. He tensed. The woman had found a lover, HIS whore had found a lover. His uncle sat crouched between the walls, balanced above him, one paw cradling the remains of a tiny infant as he ripped chunks off the child. Lord Dumont Sr. had adopted his nephew and taught him the ways of the wolf. They were high up in the village, lived in a castle on the hill. People admired the generous three, the third brunette wolf being Bastien, Dumont's best friend, turned during his first full moon, quite by accident. The three had roamed ever since, recreating themselves ever twenty years or so, the "death" of one or the other creating a "new" family. They had been the reason Elizabeth had sacrificed her body to save her village. It was tradition, Bastien thought, enraged that the girl had dared break it. Then a small shadow appeared at the end of the alley. The senior was the first to notice her and he dropped down, growling a warning to his companions. "Creatures of the fullest moon, great wolves, I offer myself, my body in exchange for the safety of my village," Renee stammered, kneeling and bowing her head, "I had abandoned thee this night and for this I apologize," she stated as she shed the cloak. She knew from the minute they looked at her, that they intended to kill her and it was with good reason that she screamed when the massive black dove at her, pinning her back and entering her in one violent jerk of his hips, the other two crowding around to bite and scratch, tearing her pale skin almost beyond recognition. The brunette moved to enter her mouth while the elder lapped at the tattered flesh, nipping at bits of it occasionally. She was lost in a haze of lust as they took her, taking turns at her battered form. She was not going to survive this, she was certain. Then one of the wolves stopped and fell to the side and she watched as its head rolled into the street. She lifted her head slightly to see Tyson battling the other two, the black and his brunette companion. The brunette fell next, but the black put up a violent fight, tearing three long marks into her lover's face that would certainly scar. Finally the axe that Tyson wielded tore into the underbelly of the powerful wolf, tearing a deep gash in his stomach. The wolf stumbled and fell. A child's cry sounded from its stomach. Shocked into action, Renee crawled over to the fallen creature and drew out a tiny baby, the one she had seen him swallow. She burst into tears, staring down in amazement at the infant. Tyson wrapped her cloak and his coat around both of them and guided her out into the street, away from the destroyed wolves. The wedding of Tyson and Renee brought the entire village to a standstill. They were presented with matching cloaks of red, lined in the fur of the brunette (for Renee) and the black(for Tyson). The elder's fur lined warm winter boots and they thanked the people of the town for their generosity. Lucy and Janine were there and Renee had reunited with her father and forgiven him for leaving her with the sisters. He had cried, holding her and begging her forgiveness, for he'd had little idea what he was doing to his daughter by giving her to them. But he gave her away at her wedding, beaming proudly as his daughter became Renee la Fleur. Nobody could remember or would ever remember such a party in celebration and it lasted until early the next morning, ending finally when Tyson begged to take his wife to bed, much to the amusement and cheers of the townsfolk. And they all lived happily ever after... The End. Revisiting After the Affair After The Affair- Revisited The Aftermath- Sorry no sex in this one. It has been just over 4 years, 5 months and 15 days since my divorce from Perley Dawkins was final, but who's counting. If you don't remember me, my name is Grace Dawkins. I was the one that screwed up my life, my husband Perley's life and ruined a perfect marriage for a roll in the hay with a young stud 20 years my junior. Perley found out about it and saw some videos of our trysts. The last one was pretty graphic and I behaved like a total slut. It was too much for Perley to accept and forgive so he divorced me. I don't blame him at all. For those of you who care, Jason was later found in an alley pretty much the worse for wear. Someone had beaten him almost to death. I knew it wasn't Perley; he was too much of a gentlemen. But he did have some friends… Well, I'm not going there. I was pretty much of a wreck for the first year or so until I got some professional help. It was nice that Perley made sure I had enough money to take care of myself since I was in no condition to work for a while. That was the way he was: no punishment and all of the money I needed to live and maintain my lifestyle. He was not the type of man to exact revenge or retribution and I was living testament to that. If anyone deserved to have been raked over the coals, it was I. I really ruined a wonderful man and a marriage that most women would die for. Stupid? Sure. No question. I did go to a counselor for a while to see if I could figure out why I did what I did. Why would a middle-aged woman in a solid marriage with a man that she loved to death cheat on him? Why would she do something like that with a kid half her age? My lover was just barely older than my children, for God's sake! After the counseling, I still had no idea why I did it. The counselor finally concluded that I was simply self absorbed and selfish, and that the only thing that made sense was curiosity. I wanted to find out what the other girls were talking about and that was the only way I knew to do it. So I did. I also found out that I didn't think of the consequences because I was married to a man that always gave me everything I wanted or needed. He had always put me first and I did the same thing; I put my needs and myself first. Oprah would have loved me! Perley was safe and would always forgive me. So I apparently thought. Since the counseling, I have been more at peace with myself. I couldn't forgive myself but I stopped beating myself up over it. It was done. I began to spend more time with my two children and their new families. They never stopped loving me and never played the blame game. We had it out; they yelled at me and called me names; I agreed and told them it was all my fault and then we went on. The only thing was that we had to plan all of my visits since Perley wouldn't come if I was going to be there and if I showed up unannounced, he would leave. In addition, Perley never spoke directly to me after that last time when he finally told me he was leaving. 4 years, 5 months and 15 days since the divorce: before that it was 3 months separation and another 4 months for the divorce. He hadn't spoken to me in 5 years, give or take a month. We spoke through our attorneys. I had not dated since the divorce and had no desire to do so. Oh, guys a lot younger than me were always hitting me on but I had been there and done that! That was why I was where I was in the first place. But, it certainly gave me a great deal of self-confidence. As a result, I had no sex life and I had not made love with my now ex husband for over 5 years, but I just looked at it as a price that must be paid. Just some facts to keep you interested. I took a job at an art gallery that was the hangout of one of my best girlfriends. She was a budding artist with a great deal of talent and a divorcee like me. We met during counseling and became fast friends. She convinced me to take a job there as a receptionist just to meet people. I did and enjoyed it immensely. I took on more responsibility because I was willing to and now pretty much ran the place. The owners were an older couple that loved to travel so it worked out well for all. I was happy there and got to meet a lot of very interesting people. I got hit on a lot by the patrons, some of whom were very well off which made me feel good, but I never took any of them up on it and didn't intend to. I was a one-man woman. Don't even say it! I was now! Maybe too little, too late but I have never given up. That pretty much brings you up to date. If you still don't remember the story, go back and read it. It was 'After the Affair' by thecelt. If you don't want to bother, no problem. The rest of this stands on its own. We had two children from our marriage that were all grown up. They were both out of the house when we divorced so they were relatively unscathed by the whole thing. Both had gone on to marry and the older boy just had a baby son. They named him Peter, after neither one of us. Probably a smart choice. We were invited to a gathering in his honor at Bill's house. Bill was our son. Now the problem here was that Perley and I hadn't spoken to each other or attended any functions at the same time since our divorce. Perley had a problem being near me since it recalled too many painful memories for him. Most of our dealings with each other were through our attorneys. They handled all of the details of money, insurance, home, utilities and other such mundane things that we once had shared. We loved our children and spent as much time with them as possible, but never together. So the real question was, what was Bill up to? He knew the relationship between his dad and me and knew that one of us would probably have to decline the invitation. I wanted to be there but I would defer to Perley. I told Bill so in a phone call. "You know that I can't come to your party if Perk is coming. He and I haven't been together since the divorce. What were you thinking?" I knew he knew what I was saying so I was curious. "You have to ask him first to see if he can be there. If he can't, than of course, I will come, but you tell Sharon that I can help her set up for the party if she wants." "Come on mom, I want both of you there. This is not about you and dad. This is about my son and his grandparents. You know Sharon's parents are dead and you are the only grandma and grandpa he will have. I think you and dad had better get over this crap and make an effort." Bill was certainly a surprise. I guess parenthood makes a boy grow up fast. "Anyway, I talked to dad and he is OK with you coming. He is definitely going to be there." Talk about a shock. Well, if Perk was all right with me being there, I would certainly go. I actually looked forward to seeing him. I had not dated since our divorce and I was not interested in any other man but him, even though he wanted nothing to do with me. He was the only one I could ever love. I certainly didn't want another meaningless sexual romp in the hay so I had no sex life. I had several good girlfriends and we occasionally went out on the town but I was usually the designated driver and I was the one that made sure none of them embarrassed themselves too much. I thought about the upcoming party and began to worry. I didn't know what I expected but if we could get together and Perk could endure my company for more than a few minutes without getting angry or sick, maybe we could become friends again. I would treasure that, if it could be. I bought myself a new outfit that accented my figure and the color brought out my eyes. I had joined a new gym and still kept myself trim. I looked pretty good if I do say so myself. I was going to go to this party and let the fates work their will. For better or worse, I was not going to pass up this chance. The party was on a Friday night at Bill's place in the suburbs of Dallas where we lived. He had a nice home and Sharon, his wife of 3 years was a doll. I adored her and she adored Bill. I visited them as often as I could without becoming a nuisance. Sharon was my confidant and she and I had many a conversation about my situation. I certainly wanted her to be aware of the consequences of any dalliance on her part. She saw my downfall and what had become of our life and took the lesson to heart. I arrived fashionably late and was welcomed at the door by Sharon. She loved my outfit and gushed about how it made me look. She whispered in my ear that Perk was there and he looked very handsome. Of course, she had a crush on him and had for some time. What woman wouldn't? I thanked her and walked into the living room where people seemed to be the thickest. There were a lot of people that I didn't know, probably friends of Bill and Sharon, but I didn't see Perk. I looked in one of the other rooms and still didn't see him. I found the bar and had myself a soda with a twist. I had stopped what little drinking I used to do. I looked around and saw only a few people that I recognized. I nodded to them and considered moving into the kitchen when suddenly I heard a voice from the past. "Hello Grace." That was all he said but it was enough to cause my heart to begin to pound and my breathing to become rapid. I just stood there for what felt like ages, but it was only a few seconds. Fortunately I was able to finally got control of my breathing and slowly turned around without falling down or otherwise making a fool of myself. "Hello Perley. I was glad to hear that you would be here and that you had no problem with my coming. I really wanted to be here for Bill and Sharon and our grandson." I looked at this man that I had hurt so many years ago. He looked no different, maybe a little more gray and certainly just as handsome. I looked in his eyes and saw no pain and no anger. That filled my heart with joy. Over the years, I had often remembered the pain and anger in his eyes the last time I saw him and it never failed to put me into a deep depression for days. No one wants to know that they were responsible for causing someone they love that kind of pain. What few realize is that infidelity is a sword that cuts both ways. "I thought that our being here together was appropriate for our grandson. We both love our son and daughter and now our grandson. It was only right that we share that love." Perley looked at me with a smile and without any trace of the anger that I last saw on his face as he walked out on me. "I'm glad that you seem happy now. I hope the pain that I caused has become less and that you have been able to forget. I think that was the last thing you said to me, that you couldn't forget. I have regretted that over these years more than anything else." I was trying to be careful with what I said. This wasn't the place for an open and honest discussion. "I am happy now. And regrets are for the past. We both have moved on and I want the same for you. I hope you are content." Perley looked like he wanted to say more and I wanted him to continue to talk to me. I didn't care what he said so long as he was talking to me. "I was wondering. Would you like to have dinner with me sometime next week? We could go to Pierre's. I believe that was one of your favorites." Did I just hear what I thought I heard? Did he just ask me to dinner? Oh, God. Oh, God. What was I going to do? I wanted to jump into his arms and hug him and kiss him and never let go. I thought however, that I had best handle this very carefully. It was no more that a polite get-together between old friends and not a romantic reunion. "I would love to have dinner with you. Anytime is fine with me, but why not tomorrow night? It is a Saturday and neither of us has to get up early for work the next day. I work every day now at an art gallery and often late into the evening. But if you would rather, any evening next week is fine." I had better just shut up now. "Tomorrow night is fine. I'll make reservations and call you with a time. Is the number still the same?" He looked pleased that I had accepted and that I wanted to do it as soon as tomorrow. "I'll give you my cell, since the home number was changed to an unlisted number. I was getting a few calls that were unpleasant. That was a while ago and I probably could list the number again." I gave him my card with the address of the gallery and my cell phone number. "Great. I'll see you tomorrow evening. Now, I guess we should mingle and meet people. I can't stay for more than a few more minutes. I really came to see Bill and Sharon and my grandson. And to see you." This last was said as he turned away. I choked up and tears started to blur my vision. I stumbled into the kitchen and grabbed Sharon by the arm and led her away. "Good Lord, what's wrong with you. You look like you have just seen a ghost!" Sharon was digging in her pocket for a Kleenex. I was crying openly now. She dragged me into a bedroom. "Perley just asked me to dinner tomorrow night. Do you believe that? He asked me to dinner and he doesn't hate me and he actually said that he wanted to see me tonight." I was babbling and she just laughed at me. "Of course I believe that. He never stopped loving you and you never stopped loving him. You screwed up and he had a problem forgiving you, but he never stopped loving you. That's what made it so hard on him. He loved you but couldn't get past what you did. He had to be without you and that killed him. He was damned if he did and damned if he didn't. I thought you knew that." "I thought he hated me. You didn't see his face the night he left me for good. His face was filled with pain and anger and it broke my heart. I was relieved when he yelled at me for what I had done because the anger was stronger than the hurt. I didn't want to see the pain. That killed me!" "Well, now you know. You two need to talk and work this out. You are my son's grandparents and I want you both to be part of his life. I don't want the two of you to be equal but separate parts." With that, she left me to myself and went back to the party. When I calmed down enough to return, Perk had left. That was probably just as well. I stayed and enjoyed the rest of the night. It had been a great night and I hoped it portended better times. I helped Sharon and Bill clean up and left for home. Perley picked me up at 7:30 the next evening. I had gone all out with a brand new little black dress that set me back over $600! It fit me like a glove thanks to some last minute alterations. I had on black mesh stockings and new black high heels and I won't even tell you what they cost. I had on a beautiful diamond necklace that Perk bought me 10 years ago and a set of earrings that he gave me on one of my birthdays. I think I looked quite nice. I also thought the necklace and earrings were a neat touch. "Wow! I had forgotten how beautiful you are." He stood there looking at me as I held the door. I almost ran back into the bedroom to cry, but I steeled myself and just smiled. "Thank you, kind sir. I try to please. I guess I still clean up OK?" I wanted to keep it light so that I could function. He really got to me with his open admiration. God, what had I done! Stop! Don't think that way! "Please come in while I get my wrap. Would you like a drink first? If not, I'm ready to go if you are." He came in and shut the door behind him. "Our reservation isn't for another 90 minutes. If you don't mind I would like to sit and talk for a while. We haven't done that in a long, long time. I think it is overdue and there are things that need to be said. I can do it now that time has passed. If that is alright with you?" He stood there waiting for me to decide. "I will do whatever you want to do. I will listen or answer questions, whatever you want. I don't know what I can say that will change anything, but I'm game." I truly would do whatever he wanted. Anything to keep him here, and in my life again. "Would you like a drink?" He demurred so I walked over to the couch and sat down. I decided to begin since I had so much I wanted to say. I hoped he would really listen to me so that I could put some of his fears to rest. "Maybe I could say a few things that I didn't get a chance to say 5 years ago when you walked out on me. You did most of the talking and I was the guilty party so I let you. I don't want to try to explain or anything since what I did was just wrong, but I do want to say a couple of things. Is that OK?" He just smiled and said, "That's OK. At least you are not going to cry and wring your hands and do any of that silly stuff. And you are right. I did do all the talking and I regret that. I also regret the silence for the last 5 years. That was inexcusable. Please go ahead." "OK. One of the things that I wanted to say when you waved me to be quiet that night was about the video that you watched that you said you couldn't forget. Well, here's something that might have helped you. Do you know what I was thinking in the video when you saw me doing what made you decide that you couldn't forget? I was thinking 'I wish I knew how to suggest this to Perk so that he and I could do this so that I could actually enjoy it'. As a matter of fact, I was usually thinking of you when I was with him. It was a simple matter of you being so much better than him. I always wanted to rush home to you after one of those afternoons just to feel better." "Now, you could ask me why, if you were so much better than him, I didn't stop. That is something that a full year of counseling couldn't answer. I just did it to see what it was like and didn't quite know how to stop it. It was such a poor excuse for lovemaking and it really wasn't something I looked forward to. It certainly wasn't worth what it cost both of us" It felt good to be able to tell him that. I wish I could have told him earlier. "As a matter of fact, since you knew of my affair for several weeks before the last time, I wish you had confronted me so that we could have had it out and settled one way or the other." "You are right about that making it easier. It could have helped me face my insecurities about your betrayal. But honestly, at the time I was so torn up about you cheating that I wasn't thinking rationally. I was in a sorry state for those months I stayed away after I found out. I think that was a mistake that ended our marriage. More so than your affair with Jason. I couldn't believe you had done that and I couldn't conceive of a reason that would allow you to do it. That's why I didn't confront you right away. That is what I was feeling at the time. The videos were really less than I made them to be. They were just something that I could point to and say, got you!" Perley looked pensive as he said this. He wasn't really angry anymore and the sadness was gone. Just more of a questioning look. "Well, I screwed up and I ruined my life and made your life miserable and I don't have any reason that makes sense. Just curiosity. Nothing more glamorous or mysterious or interesting. Really a sad way to end a marriage. Just because I wanted to see what someone else was experiencing. And because you were so good to me, I thought that I was entitled to do this for myself. I never gave you the consideration that you deserved. That is what I am most sorry about." I began to feel relieved. This had been a long time simmering, and even though we had 'moved on' we were not over it. "We both screwed up big time. I think the past 5 years have given us both time to put things into perspective and to learn from them and go forward. I know that I want you back in my life. I don't mean the way it used to be. I don't know to what degree just yet but I do know that I don't want to go back to silence." He looked at me as he said this last. I began to cry. I couldn't help myself. I just broke down and cried. I ruined my carefully applied mascara and eye shadow but I had no choice. It felt wonderful! It was the happiest I had been in the last 5 years. Revisiting After the Affair Perley came to me and took me into his arms and he held me while I cried. I sobbed for what seemed a long time but finally I calmed down. He held me away from him but still had his arms around me. "I'm sorry I made you cry. I made you ruin your beautiful makeup, but you are still beautiful to me." "I have wanted to cry this way for a long time. I can't tell you how happy you have made me. Those were happy tears. Perley, I love you and have always loved you and I can love no one else. I have been so alone since you left me and I knew that I had done it to myself. But I hoped and prayed that I might have a second chance. I will do whatever you want to do. We can be friends, we can date, we can live together or I will simply be available when you call. Anything but not having you in my life again." I willed him to believe me and to hear me. I was so close to having something important in my life back that I couldn't get my breath. "I think you should go fix your face and we can go to dinner and talk about the future: our future, together. I can't tell you yet what that will be, but we will figure it out together. OK?" "OK!" I went to put on my face so that I could look my best for dinner with the one I loved.