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Loosing Cynthia Ch. 01

By: CraCyn55



This story stands on its own, but also fits into a larger story that Started with Cyn for Short and helps to explain how Cynthia, through decent into sexual addiction came to the point where she was suicidal but eventually found the power within to make a commitment to fidelity that served her and her family well for 18 years. There were seven parts of the original story posted on one site, and nine on another, the only difference was that in the site posting seven, all three of the first chapters were consolidated into a single posting. 

The postings began in early February, so as this date I have seen many responses. A number of observations appear for public view on one of the sites so many of you may have seen some of them also. The majority of responses that end up in my e-mail have been very supportive of my efforts and of the characters in the story, but I am surprised at how negative and judgmental some of the comments have been. I welcome all response and advice equally, positive or critical, but I’ve even been told that a suitable end for both characters would involve a life sentence in sexual slavery, contraction of AIDS, or savage brutality and loss of life with high powered handguns or rifles, in one case administered at the hand of a vengeful oldest son.

It hurts me to think some people hold onto and embrace such pain and emotion in their own lives that they can justify such violence. I received a response from one good man whose life was turned upside down by a wife that did some of the same things Cyn did, but apparently without any regret at all. That relationship ended in divorce and the husband got custody of the kids. Ttwo daughters that are now in college passed the story of Cyn in progress on to him and he wrote to tell me hoped Cyn would loose Craig and custody of their children as well.

For his sake I’m sorry the ending didn’t give him the pound of flesh he may have hoped for, but the point is, that this man who really had grounds for bitterness was still much less violent than some of the others. The same gentleman went on to explain how his ex wife now had aids and had come back to ask for his forgiveness. I can understand why he refused to reconcile in any way, but I’m more concerned about how his justified response to her leaves him with only the shallow victory of revenge. The loss still affects him far more than it does her.

I personally know of a woman who thought she had a great marriage with a loving husband and several children until her husband informed her he was gay, and left them all behind. No one could have felt more legitimate pain and scarring in a life than her or the man above, so when her husband came back several years later and told her he was dying of aids, and begged her for forgiveness, she would have been just as well justified to tell him to go straight to hell also. Instead, she took him back into her home and cared for him until he died.

That act of greatness on her part was an expression of faith in humanity and her ability to see a sliver of potential in the man she chose to be the father of her children. Out of respect for the love she had honestly felt at one time, even if she no longer felt it, she cared for him as unselfishly as I believe a person could. This woman has expressed some of the most beautiful and inspiring thoughts in poetry to inspire the best in humanity I have ever read, and she knew she could not turn her back on the man who had hurt her so terribly without turning her back on all the beautiful and inspiring things she had ever thought or put to verse.

The ones who were best affected by her unselfish act of charity were herself, and the ones she loved most, her own children. They are the ones who receive the balm of healing, not her unfortunate husband, he died. But I’ll tell you this as well; she never once regretted her decision and never once condemned him for his. When Jesus said let him who is without sin cast the first stone, he didn’t qualify it by saying him who has the fewest sins, or the smallest. I believe the most important fundamental attitude in the human family is to always open your heart to possibility and refuse to close it on account of anything.

I believe we are at our weakest and worst frame of mind when we allow emotion to dictate revenge and violence on anyone for any reason. And we are at our strongest and best when we learn to stand above and beyond the range of emotional reaction to the things that happen around us. I think we as a people were at our strongest after 9/11 not by our resolve to use violence, but by our resolve to stand firmly against it.

For those of you who didn’t like the slutty side of Cyn, you’ll hate the two parts of this story, because they show how she descended into a suicidal state as a result of the selfishness in her sexual addiction that led her into bondage, before she ever married Craig. How else could she have ever come face to face with the specter of nothing, and made the resolve to be faithful to him for so long. For those of you who are already chomping at the bit to put a bullet through her head, just assume she took her own life and let it alone; give yourself a break.

Through all of this, and in all there is to come, I think there is always potential for greatness in Cyn just like there is in everyone, including all of the people I have had the pleasure to meet in this life. I love her for where she’s been and who she can be in spite of it and I love Craig for his courage to look for the best in everyone he can. 

LOOSING CYNTHIA Part 1 of 2

From the time I was a little girl, my parents had told me that one day I would meet my handsome prince and begin a fairy tale life of happy ever after. I was told that in order to deserve a prince, I would have to be the very best princess possible. Even before I entered my teens, modesty was stressed in clothing and thought. As a six year old, I wouldn’t dream of playing in the backyard in the little plastic pool without a shirt on. I even scolded neighbor men who didn’t wear one while they mowed their lawn on hot summer days. 

The first information I had concerning sex warned that it was very serious and a terrible thing for anyone to consider before marriage. I had a distinct impression that whenever I was introduced to it after marriage, somehow all the bad things associated with it would magically go away so it could be tolerated, and I would start to have babies. I remember my mother warning me that kissing boys was very dangerous, that if I let a boy kiss me, then I would become pregnant and bring disgrace to the whole family.

By the time I was involved in a sex education discussions in school, I was learning along with my friends that reality was somewhere between my parent’s ideas and the exaggerated misinformation in the school yard. One constant seemed to carry through however; for a girl, sex was an uncomfortable social interaction that could be painful and traumatic at the very least. It certainly wasn’t something I was taught to look forward to and I never thought there would be any pleasure associated with it when I was finally had to learn to live with it.

Opinions from those who had already crossed the line were puzzling at first, and the more I heard about how excited it made them feel the more I started to question my parent’s voracity and the notions I had been taught all my life. My world was turning upside down as I became curious about the experiences others were having or claiming to have and didn’t know what to believe myself

My relationship was becoming closer with a boy I had known for several years. Halfway through my senior year in High School, he started to nudge me toward the things I had always been taught to stay away from and be afraid of. The areas of highest curiosity involved the things I had been taught for the longest period of time; it was probably normal that I would be vulnerable on the opposite end of the scale from the modesty that had always been stressed. Eddy overwhelmed my senses when he persuaded me to expose myself in his car in the student parking lot. I stripped naked and experienced raw and intense pleasure like I never imagined and couldn’t help wanting more.

Eddy exploited my weakness as he brought out pleasures through pushing me into exhibitionistic adventures that became as intoxicating as any drug or liquor ever made. The more I experienced the incredible and immediate pleasures, the more I was willing to do anything anyone wanted me to, just to feel them. Eddy and two of his friends held back a little to keep things at a somewhat ‘innocent’ level by not pushing me to a loss of virginity.

They may as well have taken that away though, because they were dong everything else they could. I was being finger fucked regularly and they made masturbate for them as well. The only thing they accomplished by not taking my cherry was giving me a false sense of security and increasing the anxiety and anticipation preceding my eventual deflowering. 

The most incredibly orgasmic episode I remember before being fucked was when I ended up naked except for my high heels on a crowded dance floor at my senior prom. I had already become addicted to exhibitionism and sexual submission to Eddy’s direction and had already committed to be obedient before Eddy told me to take off my panties while we were dancing. It was hard to be secretive while dancing in Eddy’s arms, but the challenge only added to the sexy rush I felt.

The red satin dress I was wearing had slits in both sides that helped as I snagged my panties with my fingers at the top of the slits lifting the hem only several inches and pulled them down until they became loose enough around my legs to fall on their own to my feet. Darla, one of Eddie’s two allies eventually took off all my clothes in a dark corner and showed me off to a group of about a dozen guys, while she played with my pussy and made me cum. It was an exhibition in lust that would never be forgotten by those present and probably known by everyone in Helena within time. 

Our sex play was so constant and frequent during the last half of that senior year that I always expected something sexual to happen. The pace was maintained well into the summer with so much regularity I almost became nauseated with the excess. By the time I was getting ready to go to college I had overdosed on this adrenalin form of sex so much, I almost thought I would die if it didn’t end. Pandora’s Box was every bit as destructive as the warnings had foretold, and I was relieved to be going to college so I could break away; it would almost be like re-habilitation.

I went to a small church owned college and started to stuff my sex genie back into his bottle and I committed to act more mature and proper. I dated a number of guys that had no intention of pushing my hot buttons like Eddy had, but they were boring. Very few of them even seemed curious about whether I had any buttons or if I did where they were. It was almost easy to become Church-minded and boring myself.

Girls got together in public settings to properly enlighten each other on the characteristics to look for in a perfect “mate”. Little was ever said about qualities or traits relating to sex appeal; instead, honesty, respect, ambition and thoughtfulness were always at the top of their lists, right under spiritual strength of course. It all sounded good, even to me, and I started to feel guilty only when I thought back and remembered, so I pushed the memories into the bottle with the genie to ease the troubling recollections of the previous year. 

What I didn’t realize in my conscious mind was that the unconscious part was not yet willing to let go of the sexual addiction. When I was alone, my thoughts became more and more sex oriented and I still loved the wet and slippery feeling I got in my pussy as I remembered the exiting times I had with the exhibitionistic games under Eddy’s magic touch and the mind blowing orgasms I had when he finger fucked me or made me fuck myself for his enjoyment. In the semi privacy of my room when my roommate was asleep or gone I masturbated to shuddering orgasms several times a week. 

Although modest clothing was mandatory in the dress code, I pushed the limit wherever possible. I loved science classes, where the room was arranged like a little amphitheater, with the lecturer at a level below the seated students. On those days I would wear skirts or dresses as short as allowed on campus, so that when I sat, the hem pulled well above my knees, then I would take notes on the little fold down writing panel while I spread my legs as much as possible to show off my panties, or when I felt really dirty, my naked pussy. I preferred knee length socks on science days so the view of my panty crotch or naked puss was less hidden.

As I became more daring, my resolve to avoid temptation dropped. When ever I returned to Helena I looked up Eddy and even though I promised myself to be a “good girl” I always dressed so he could undress me easily and show me off. I started to look forward to the exhibitionistic reunions and soon the idea of going back to home for a few days would have me wet with anticipation.

It was during this period that I met Craig Jamison. With his winning ways, confidence and abundant “good characteristics” it wasn’t long before I really fell for him and thought he would make a great catch. For a while this helped me shift away from my obsession to daydream or show off, but the more romantic our relationship became, the more desperately I craved the sexual stimulations I had come to need. Although he met the core criteria for a perfect spouse, the thing that bothered me was that he treated me too well and too respectfully, he was the perfect prince but I had no idea how to be a princess anymore. I was starting to lust and he couldn’t see it. 

We would make out for hours and he’d still be able to maintain control while I was climbing the walls to be fucked. Often when he left, I would open my blouse and push up my bra to expose my tits so I could fondle them and pinch my nipples as I walked to my bedroom. More than once my roommate was awake as I entered exposed like this. I would pull my bra modestly back into place, and with a sly smile seductively tell her that things were getting too hot making out, so Craig went home. In spite of my lack of sexual fulfillment the relationship between Craig and I deepened until one night over a romantic dinner he finally asked me to marry him. 

He hadn’t planned on proposing that night although he knew was going to do it soon. We hadn’t even been window-shopping for rings so he hadn’t bought one yet. He was just so excited about marriage that the proposal sort of slipped out accidentally. He didn’t fully realize what he had asked until I accepted, so we thought we might wait until the holidays to make it formal. I was going to Helena for Christmas, and Craig would celebrate with his family, then he would join me in time for New Years Eve so he could meet my family. From there we would see how things went.

I got to Helena with pent up emotions and wet panties. I had called Eddy and asked to see him (so I could tell him I was officially unavailable and off the market). Even though I denied it to my conscious self, I still dressed to be undressed. We were at his house in the back sun porch just off the kitchen where we could see Eddy’s mother preparing dinner when I told him. He became quiet and then after a pause simply asked “when”. 

I must have sounded less certain about everything when I explained we hadn’t set a date yet, because he took me into a warm embrace that I thought was only to express congratulations. His hands moved over my back and I thought for an instant, he might be feeling sad about the coming change; instead, his hold on me strengthened and his movements became more urgent as his hands moved progressively lower until he was caressing and cupping my ass. For some reason, I didn’t push him away. He breathed seductively into my ear and caressed the side of my neck with his lips; then said quietly and firmly, “Take off your panties.” 

I pushed away in protest but Eddy looked at me with penetrating eyes and said, “I’ve never forced you to do anything you weren’t begging to do already, “Now, take off your panties, you know you need to. I pulled my skirt well above my delicate sheer bikinis and held it in place with my elbows while I hooked my thumbs into the waist band and pushed them down over my soft hips until they fell freely to my feet. I stood holding my skirt high so he could see my soft flat tummy and my rich black pubic bush; when he told me to move my feet apart, I did and knew he could see the swollen lips of my labia between my spread legs and knew that I was already wet for him. 

We were interrupted briefly by his mother asking if I would stay for dinner. Eddy answered that I was while I just stood there with my panties around my feet. When she went back into the kitchen I was surprised when he stopped me from pulling them back up and continued to undress me. He found and lowered the zipper at the back of my skirt. And I tried half heartedly tried to stop him, but my skirt was already on its way down to combine with the hobble at my feet. 

He held me to him in a powerful embrace as his hands caressed and mauled my ass cheeks then started to move up my back under my blouse and deftly unhooked my bra strap. I knew then that he was going to strip me naked not more than 15 feet from his mother in the kitchen, and I wanted him to do it. I helped him unbutton my blouse and he pushed it from my shoulders and removed it along with my bra, then he massaged my aching tits and pinched the erect nipples. 

He urgently moved one hand to join with mine already busy at my clit and pussy. He pushed several fingers deeply into the sucking wetness and then pumped them in and out feverously to get me off. I forced my hand down the front of his jeans so I could stroke his big thick cock and in only a few more seconds of urgent finger fucking and fisting his cock we both exploded in flesh quivering orgasms.

The blast of Eddy’s cum had covered my tummy and tits with the hot salty cream. I sensuously rubbed it into my skin before sucking some of the nectar on my fingers into in my mouth. We wanted to hang on to each other and bask in the afterglow but Eddy’s mother was calling us to the table for dinner. 

We sat next to each other with the sliding glass door behind us that opened to a wooden deck overlooking the back yard. Not long after we had settled at the table and started to eat, Eddy had my skirt pulled up again.. I had to pull in tight to the table top for at least minimal cover and I spread my legs while he and I alternated the task of keeping my pussy to a boil.

When everyone finished, the family settled into the front room to watch TV programs, and Eddy led me by the hand back into the sun porch. This time he pulled the sheer curtains wide, opening the scene to our view as though we were outside and turned on the table lamps in opposite corners to illuminate anything in front of the windows to anyone outside. I was nervous when he led me to the center of illumination and my heart pounded with sexual anxiety.

“Now, where were we?” He asked as he began to stroke and caresses my body through my clothing. 

When I asked what he was going to do he only said. “You know.” He moved behind me, with me facing the windows and unbuttoned my blouse again so he could remove it. He held me against him as he rubbed and fondled me and cupped my breasts from below, then he massaged them through my skimpy bra, and moved his fingers beneath the cups in teasing circles to squeeze and caress the soft yielding mounds and pinch the hardened nipples. 

He pulled the bra up first over my straining tits and then on up over my head and off without un-clasping it. He rubbed massaged and pinched everything again urgently before he thrust one hand under the waistband of my skirt, slid it over my lower tummy and directly to my willing cunt. My hands went to the zipper at the back of my skirt, opened it and then pushed it from my hips until it resumed its favorite position at my feet.


Loosing Cynthia Ch. 01



My hands came back to caress and fondle the front of his jeans. “Get my pants down.” He said, and my pussy gushed with arousal as I unfastened his jeans and urgently pushed them down to his knees. He kicked about until they were off his legs and I could feel the wicked raging penis probing against my back and ass. I reached back to hold and caress it and was amazed at its heat, length and hardness. 

Between the juices from my begging crotch and the seminal fluid generously oozing from the end of his prick we were awash in lubrication. Eddy started to raise and lower his body against my ass so that I felt his thick shaft sliding up and down the deep crease between my cheeks. Without being told to, I leaned forward thinking the angle would bring the action closer to my wet and swollen pussy lips. It worked and the sensation was driving me crazy.

The natural arousal and instincts of sex demanded a feeling of fullness in my hungry cunt and I knew that any number of fingers would not quench the fire in me, more than anything else I desperately wanted to have that hard fat cock that was stimulating my swollen labia, buried deeply inside my un-fucked cunt. “Ooohhh, oh god Eddy, do it! Fuck me, fuck me with your big cock, fuck me now! I begged even as I felt his huge purple knob pushing its way into me. 

The head popped through the outer opening and my cunt wanted to suck the fat knob in deep but it quickly met resistance as it pushed against my protective hymen. “Oh shit, I need it so bad, DO IT.” I cried. “FUCK ME DAMNIT, FUCK ME.” I almost screamed and with a firm thrust and a little pain, the membrane tore and Eddy sheathed his pulsing penis deeply in my virgin pussy. 

My climax had started the moment I first begged him to take me and continued to build force like an earthquake throughout his initial penetration. Now there were endless aftershocks that must have been a continuation of one mighty orgasm or repetitions that seemed equal to the first. The climax deep within me seemed to go on forever as Eddy pumped urgently toward his own cum. “Oh, shit, Oooooohh god, I love it, fuck me with your beautiful cock Eddy, Fuck me good.”

There was never a thought about his pulling out, and I had never given thought to the calendar game for considering fertility. I didn’t care; all I wanted was everything I could get. I felt his body start to stiffen and become more urgent, and then, all of a sudden, he went rigid in jerking spasms until he rose on his tiptoes and pulled me hard into his groin. The action sent the head of his cock as deeply into my hungry womb as it could and he held me there as he sent jet after jet in an endless river of hot cum deep inside me.

We didn’t care if anyone had witnessed our lust and hoped that someone had. His whole family could have come in answer of the noise we must have made and watched us instead of Happy Days; it wouldn’t have stopped us. This time we did enjoy the afterglow for a while and cuddled nakedly as the heat in our bodies subsided.

I didn’t know it could be like this I said softly with a tenderness that showed the deep feelings I still had for Eddy that were starting to cause turmoil in my mind and heart.

“Are you sure you can be happy with anyone else.” Eddy asked quietly. It was a question somewhat new to him as well because he had a number of other girlfriends even during the more serious and involved part of our relationship, but it was not new to me. Ours had become a relationship with a single dimension, one that served our separate and particular needs, mine to be exposed sexually at the will and direction of another, like a toy, and his to be in control of another’s passion. It had worked well when kept within that narrow context. Recently I wondered if the context should have expanded and if I would ever have this feeling of sexual intensity with Craig, or anyone else. 

I think I better go home I said quietly, I’ve got a lot to think about.

The next time I saw Eddy, we had both been able to think and we both agreed that even though we felt deeply about each other and the things we did together, we were mature enough to know that neither of us felt the need to change what had been good between us. We both felt like there was another world out there that required some of our attention also, and that the best way for either of us to find it was not by being a couple riding into the sunset together.

I guess by now, you wont really be surprised to know that after taking my virginity Eddy had me strip naked three more times in public exhibition during the four days I waited for Craig to arrive. It seemed like we were both reaching out for one last thrill (over and over again) before my future fiancé was scheduled to arrive on Thursday evening. All day on Thursday I was filled with apprehension about the Eddy portion of my life coming to an end and about whether Craig and I would be able to create enough excitement in our marriage to be truly happy in every way. 

About midway through the afternoon I decided that I had to see Eddy ONE LAST TIME. I was like a junky coming down from a high and was starting to get the shakes. I rushed out of the house telling my mom I had to run to the store for tampons and was going to stop in to say hi to an old girl friend before Craig got here.

“Hurry back so you’re here to introduce us.” Mom said as I flew by not giving her time to question me further.

I drove my dad’s car to Eddy’s house and when I saw him I threw my arms around him crying as I tried to kiss him goodbye. “Hey girl, take it easy, the worlds not ending I’m sure I’ll see you again.” He said. “C’mon, let’s get out of here.” 

We drove around the city in dad’s Plymouth (with Eddy driving) using secondary streets so we wouldn’t be rushed and mostly we talked. We stopped at a Wendy’s and thought back to a critical point in our relationship after the second time he got me to strip naked in his car. We had gone to Hamburger Heaven to talk and he ended up making me take off my panties in our booth. I smiled when I reminded him that he had told me I would strip naked there, and he laughed when he reminded me about the time I did. That’s not going to happen again here, there are no booths I said as I pulled him out the door to the car and we got in. 

“I’ve got to see you again at your best Cyn, so I can always remember.” Eddy said with a wicked twinkle in his eye, and I knew immediately what he meant. I had slipped a polyester shift like dress on over only my panties and without a bra and grabbed a coat against the cold when I left the house, so I could be ready just in case. I slipped my coat off and threw it into the back seat, and then I pulled the shift all the up and over my head and off as well. 

I was almost gloriously nude one more time at least before we even left Wendy’s parking lot. I pushed my panties off and down my legs and slipped them off my feet to be the way I truly loved to be, completely naked. I turned toward him and stretched out on the big bench seat so he could appreciate my nudity, and we turned out of the lot and into the road.

He motioned for me to come closer and once I did he started to play with me. I was already leaking onto my dad’s seat (I wondered how much of my cum had collected on the seat in Eddy’s car over the last year). Using his right hand, he scooped up some of the dripping nectar and tasted it, and then he got more of it and to spread over my body like a dog marking his territory.

Since Eddy had already fucked me four days ago, his cock had become a more important part of our sex play and he quickly opened his pants. He hadn’t been wearing underwear and his rigid cock was lying back against his belly sticking out above the waist already; with the snap undone it sprang to life in the open.

I became fascinated as I stared at it again and reached out to take it in my hand. I loved the veined texture of his rigid muscle and noticed the clear fluid oozing out of its tip. I reached out with a finger and scooped some up to compare with the taste of my own and was fascinated with its salty flavor and stringiness. 

I started to stroke it the way I had noticed him doing it during mutual masturbation episodes and thought it might break if I bent it because of its stiffness. I was pointing it towards me as I studied the oozing eye at its tip and pumped it rhythmically for just a few strokes before he stiffened and it started to jerk and send jets of hot cream in bursts against my face and tits. When it stopped shooting fluid, I tried to pump out more but he grabbed my wrist and stopped me telling me it got really sensitive after he came. I moved my fingers to the puddle that had formed on my tits and was running down my tummy toward my pubic hair, and scooped up some to taste.

The flavor itself didn’t make any particular impression, but I loved it because of where it came from. As I toyed with it and used the fingers I made wet by it to stimulate my sensitive clit Eddy’s cock started to lengthen and bob as it stiffened again. Darkness had overtaken us and I had lost track of time. I wasn’t sure where we were in the city, but noticed that Eddy had turned off the road and come to a stop while I had become mesmerized by his swollen tool. 

I squinted into the darkness and almost died in panic. Craig’s car was standing vacant by the side of us. We were parked in my parent’s driveway! My future fiancé was inside visiting with my family, and I was scared shitless. I screamed at Eddy and called him a son of bitch, but I felt more exposed than I had ever been in all the things we did and that produced the inevitable arousal that always followed. The ultra high sense of danger and wanton daring combined as well to bring me to a higher sexual pitch than I had ever recalled.

I’ve got to go I screamed and cried knowing I was still at the brink of the orgasm I had set aside when I directed my attention to Eddy’s hard cock, and I still desperately needed relief. While I struggled, in spite of my sexual need, to locate my cloths and get out of the car, Eddy quickly ran around to my side. He opened the door before I could dress and pulled me to him. My arms were barely into the shift and my naked body was exposed to him as well as anyone else who happened along our street that was not too busy to notice naked young lovers. 

With erotic force he said. ‘I’m going to fuck you right here where your loving fiancé can catch us and see what a sweet slutty hoar he’s marrying.”

Instead of being angry with his filthy language, my labia swelled and my clit seemed to vibrate as sex fluid ran freely down my leg. I felt his pants sliding down his legs to free his penis which was then allowed to spring upward between us from the strength of its rigid arousal.

I felt his cock against my belly and in a breathless moment that seemed to last forever pushed him downward so its aim would bring him in line with my greedy hole. Once I felt the tip where it needed to be for penetration I moved down and he moved up so I was impaled in a single mighty thrust that fully sheathed his cock in my hungry cunt. He pumped furiously for several moments but was able to delay his climax because of his earlier cum. I had started to climax with intensity mid way through his first stroke and continued almost without end. 

In an agonizing way that made my pussy spasm to hold him in, he pulled all the way out then turned me toward the car. I leaned into the open doorway with one hand against the frame and the other on the seat as he came up behind me and savagely thrust his hard prick covered in my cum back into my pussy from behind. This sent him even deeper and brought another onslaught of my arousal fluid. 

When I looked up and across the car I could see into the front window of the house and watch as family members and Craig moved around the front room. I could see the excitement registered in the facial expressions as familiarity increased between everyone, and I felt incredibly wicked to outside watching while Eddy’s hot slippery penis pumped in and out.

The intensity of stimulation and nasty feelings worked together so that in just a moment more, almost too soon for my lusty need he stiffened and started to empty another hot load of cum deep inside my womb. Eddy had once again fed me the carrot I had imagined tasting for so long, and I knew that even though I loved the man inside the house and wanted to be with him always, It was necessary that this other man should be the one who took my virginity and these few days would be locked in my memory for ever. 

As our lusty bodies began to cool, we became more aware of our exposure but in spite of the winter’s cold we dressed slowly, almost hoping to be discovered. After a tender caress meant as a loving goodbye, Eddy said he wanted to walk back home and I watched until turned at the corner and disappeared from sight. I wondered even as I prepared to go inside when and under what circumstances I might see Eddy again.

It was almost hard to build the enthusiasm I needed to show for my reunion with Craig by the time I got into the living room, but I guess I did well enough. As I turned the corner, my pace quickened and my heart lifted as I took in his handsome features when he turned and saw me. He threw his arms around me in a loving embrace, and I knew everything was going to work out fine. He had already captured the hearts of my family and my eyes moistened noticeably as I apologized for taking too long and missing his arrival. As I slipped my hand in my coat pocket, I flushed a little when I felt and handled the balled up material of my panties and bra that I had put there instead of slipping them back on.

It’s funny how the thought of being naked under my coat and dress in this setting seemed to excite and turn me on almost as much as being naked in front of the windows at Eddy’s house had been. I wasn’t anxious to fully dress again and enjoyed the imagination of replaying the scene from Eddy’s sun porch in my living room with Craig. 

We spent the remainder of the evening at home with one of mom’s home cooked meals and then visited socially with members of the family getting to know everything possible about each other. Craig sat on the couch with me beside him as we told about our courtship and the semester at school. Eventually mom got out the photo album to show our family history in Helena and to embarrass me with occasional unflattering photos of my awkward growing years.

I went into the kitchen for sodas and when I returned sat in the easy chair opposite Craig. I had the most perverse desire to open my legs far enough to show him my naked pussy, but thought that might not be a good idea, but I still moved around, crossing and re-crossing my legs like a nervous animal and did everything short of outright splits to tease and plant seeds of imagination in his mind. When we finally had a moment alone, we embraced each other with more excitement than we could show earlier with everyone in the room. We kissed passionately and I felt his tongue probing against mine. We swallowed each other as we ground our bodies together anxiously. 

“Why I think you missed me Craig said.” His lips brushed along the side of my neck as he spoke.

“How did you guess?” I breathed hotly in his ear? The way I was squirming around might have been a clue I thought, and he told me it was. 

“You really look sexy in that dress.” He said as he held me out slightly to get a better view. 

“Why Mr. Jamison,” I teased “In this old rag?”

“That’s no rag.” He growled, “You look almost naked under it.” He said as his hands moved over me.

My excitement was pitched with danger at the possibility he would actually find out how nude I was and in my sexual heart (which must be located somewhere in my pussy) I wanted him to know how bare I was and discover that he could take me in passion whenever he wanted. However, as I said before, Craig was the perfect gentleman and refused to give up more than a hint of the sexuality he was capable of.

We decided to go for a ride so I could show him around my town, and grabbed our coats as we headed for the big mercury sedan he drove. These seats are certainly big enough for sex I thought, conscious of the lack of wetness on the seat where I sat (Why on earth couldn’t I get my thoughts out of the gutter I wondered). As we drove past Eddy’s house, I pointed it out and shivered sexily. 

I had actually told Craig quite a bit about my high school boyfriend without revealing the salacious details of our relationship. Much of what I told him just touched on the titillating aspect of our activities, in part because I didn’t really want to hide and hold things back, but also because I wanted to give him some idea of what I was capable so he would feel freer to do push a little more.

I confessed that the make out sessions we had become steamy and that we engaged in heavy petting often. I told him how guilty I felt afterwards and admitted that the excitement made me dress so Eddy could have easy access to my naked sex. I actually hoped this would tempt Craig to take the same liberties, but he would just listen earnestly and then tell me, “its ok honey, I still love you and consider you to be as pure and sweet as anyone I’ve ever known.” 

This would only drive me wild and make me question how hot he would be in marriage. I even told Craig about how I would undo my blouse and pull up my bra after he had gone home following one of our own make-out sessions in my apartment so I could tease my roommates with the possibility of our naughty behavior. I hoped he would pick up the hint and start playing with my tits but, no such luck. 

As we drove down the road sitting close I intentionally worked my hem half way up my leg to show my naked thigh. I held his hand, and then placed in on the naked inner surface of my leg and actually helped close his fingers against my tepid flesh so he would have no doubt as to what I wanted. I even pulled it towards my waiting pussy so he would know that was ok, but after light resistance was encountered at my hem, he had to show some initiative on his own to go further. And I’ll be damned if he didn’t resist the obvious easy temptation. 

I was going to go mad I thought, and wondered what in the world was I going to have to do to answer the questions that plagued me about our sexual compatibility; they were beginning to really bother me. I tried to think coherently while needing to interrupt my deep thoughts from time to time as I had to point out various meaningless things about Helena. 

Craig moved his hand from my thigh so he could put his arm around my shoulder and pull me into a loving cuddle. At a stop light he turned to look into my soul with eyes that seemed to worship me and kissed me in a tender and deeply loving way that nearly took my breath away. You don’t know how hard it’s been to be separated from you these last four days he said. My heart leapt with emotion as I realized how deeply this man loved me, and I felt tears well up in my eyes as I realized the difference between this emotional intimacy I felt with Craig, and the sexual intimacy I had shared with Eddy. I was torn between two colliding worlds, and I knew beyond doubt that I loved him in spite of the uncertainties and guilt that warred within me.

With Craig, there was no end to romance and caring but with Eddy there was none at all. I don’t mean to say that Eddy didn’t really care about me, or I about him, I’m sure he did and he wanted to see me happy and to do what ever he needed to make sure I was. It’s just that Eddy could never see possible keys to my happiness other than the sexual ones he discovered in the school parking lot. 

Eddy couldn’t see that beyond this single avenue of sexual rush, there were many other dimensions to me that each required their own form of expression, and each dimension needed its own support and encouragement from someone who would be anxious to help me uncover all of my potentials. I knew in my heart that Craig, not Eddy would be the one who could and would discover the most in me, and that there would be no end to his commitment to help me unlock all of the doors to my happiness.




Loosing Cynthia Ch. 01



A sense of peace and calm fell over me as I basked in the confidence and secure feeling that Craig and I would somehow find a way to build a solid life together that would include its own forms of excitement and fulfillment. I just didn’t appreciate at that moment the power of the addictions that still held me prisoner that constantly smoldered just beneath my fragile outer shell, or how difficult it would be to keep them under control if the right circumstance and active catalyst were present. As I look back from today’s perspective, I think I was trying to deal with growing nymphomania.

Friday night was New Years Eve and I had already accepted the invitation for Craig and me to attend an intimate celebration in one of the more exclusive night clubs in town. After the episode at the senior prom Darla seemed to feel she had pushed me further than she should have and actually withdrew from the activities where Eddy continued to show me off. She still knew what was going on, but decided to try to tip the overloaded balance scale away from the perversions by offering sincere nonjudgmental friendship. Darla was the hostess and organizer for the night club party, and since it was one of the nicest and most popular clubs in town and Darla had extended the invitation, I was happy to accept.

It was a spacious building that seemed to have several different focus areas that were interrelated. There was a large common area with tables and booths like you would find in a nice restaurant where you could order a wide range of food items earlier in the evening; later the food was replaced with alcoholic beverages and a party mood. A good sized dance floor was located central to entire area and on the opposite side from the dance area there was another room similar to the eating and drinking area, which was multi functional, the floor could be cleared to expand the dance floor or be set up with more tables. For the party, its primary function would be the dance floor.

Craig and I arrived nicely dressed and I enjoyed introducing my handsome future to as many as I recognized as we moved about the room. In spite of the fact that the activities in our Church social facility were tame and somewhat boring, few from our Church group would be in attendance here, probably because alcohol is one of the things we are warned to stay away from and there was plenty of it available. Craig and I were comfortable drinking cokes without feeling out of place.

As the evening progressed the party mood increased and everyone was having fun. Craig and I danced together a lot at first, but since we both dance well and had personalities that attracted attention, we found ourselves being taken up with a steady supply of other partners that wanted to take a spin with us.

I had worn a black velvet dress with small sleeves in an off the shoulder look that left my neck and shoulders almost bare, so I wore a strapless under-wire half cup bra that lifted my breasts and created a deep mysterious cleavage. The bra cups barely covered my nipples and revealed part of the dollar sized aureoles around them. The neck of the dress was cut low enough that the soft swelling above the bra and a good portion of the cleavage were constantly visible. The hem came to about two inches above my knees so altogether I thought it was conservative with a tantalizing seductiveness to tease Craig. I wore a pair of sheer white panties under sheer black hose and three inch heels to complete the outfit. 

Craig possessed the finesse, stamina, and know how to make any female feel like a professional ballroom dancer, so he was becoming more and more occupied by the many girls and ladies whose own dance partners were lacking in that area. He would seek me out for a dance or two after being gone for 10, 20, then 30 minuets or more. 

During our separations I was being seen to by a smaller group of attractive men with two of them demanding the most attention. When one was dancing with me the others were watching. The two seemed to quickly engage in a game of one-upmanship. I learned that the taller and more athletic of the two was Vince and he had played tight end for a Junior College football team not far from Helena, and he was strong enough to be very much in control and move me about easily. The other, named Tony, was shorter, probably about 5’ 10” I guessed. He had rich black hair and dark penetrating eyes; he definitely had the bad boy look that I knew could be dangerous.

Their interest in my breasts was unmistakable and as we danced they started to hold me tighter and more sensuously with each new song. Soon I was feeling the sexual rush that always attended a new adventure. My future fiancé lover had not been affected by the sex signals I was radiating, but my dance lovers definitely were. I could feel their cocks harden against me as the held me tight and our bodies ground together, it made my head spin with lust. When they started to caress my lower back, I didn’t protest, I purred, and when they cupped and mauled my rounded ass I didn’t protest, my pussy creamed.

We danced our way further into the multipurpose area where the crowd was ‘more select’; primarily the horny men who were watching the game (probably the husbands and boyfriends of the women dancing with Craig) and my two partners. I was rapidly getting into things myself and made it a point to keep my back towards the watchers so I could also keep a look out for when Craig returned.

During one of his longer absences may dance partners started to raise the back of my dress to expose my legs. I encouraged them by chewing on the side of their neck and grinding my pussy against their hard cocks. Progressively the lifting went higher and higher until I was certain the sheer bikini panties beneath my hose could clearly be seen. I was certain of it when I felt the cool breeze on my ass as my partner played with it. I felt the bad boy Tony move his fingers to my waist and my breath caught as they edged under my waist band and went inside my hose and panties. 

He mauled and squeezed my naked ass so everyone could see and started to play in the swampy lubrication between my legs so that the creamy cum-like fluid became visible as it soaked my panties and the dark hose.

I was lost in the lust filled exhibition and laid my head weekly on his shoulder. When I opened my eyes, which had been closed in the heat of arousal, I jumped away as I saw Craig making his way into the room looking for me. I pushed away from Tony’s clutching hands and pushed my dress down to cover myself and then moved quickly to cut Craig off before he came too far into the room.

I rushed up to him and turned him away from the scene of my lust back out towards the center of the dance floor and then we moved back over to the tables so we could grab a coke and recoup energy. After a few moments he was ready to dance again so we went back out to the tempting music of a fast swing number. We could both show off our talent as we danced to the enjoyment of onlookers. When the music ended there was even some applause from the impressed observers, and we gave a little bow in appreciation.

When the first strains of a romantic slow number started up Craig was interrupted by a tap on his shoulder. “Mind if I cut in?” Vince said. 

My cheeks flushed hotly as the two men regarded each other carefully. I was terrified that Vince’s lust and physical confidence would move him to challenge Craig and take me away by force if necessary, and my own passion still had enough influence over me I feared I would follow him like a mindless slut if he told me to. As we stood in uneasy silence, the pressure in my head increased so I thought I was going to faint. Things quickly turned better when Darla took Eddy by the arm and said; “I think it’s my turn with you handsome,” then she started to lead him away quietly. 

Craig looked over his shoulder in time to see Vince take hold of me in a seductive embrace that revealed the level of intimacy I had granted to him, but the look in his eyes didn’t seem to notice as he silently mouthed words that said simply he was sorry, but his fans demanded more his time. I’m surprised he didn’t show concern because Vince was doing everything short of fucking me already as he passionately fondled everything he could through my dress. I chocked back the heat in my own emotion and smiled sweetly at him before Craig turned into Darla’s arms.

Vince was quickly propelling us back toward our show-off area as he reached between us and groped my straining swollen tit. He forcefully pulled my dress and bra cup down to spill my right breast into the open before we were safely into the lower light. The watchers, who had wandered off thinking the game was up, when I rushed off to Craig, quickly returned. When I knew they were assembled, I turned around with my back against Vince and cuddled into him. I turned my head back so I could whisper into his ear breathlessly, “Take my tits out, and let them see.”

“You are a slut.” He said back so the others could hear.

“Yes I am! I’m your slut tonight.” I said loudly looking straight at the entire group. “Treat me like a slut!”

Vince pulled the front of my dress down exposing my firm tits only partially covered by the white lace half bra. He groped them powerfully so they hurt and pinched the already erect nipples so I thought they would burst. He unhooked my bra and threw it into the watching crowd for a souvenir then he slipped his thumbs into the dress top and slid it down to my narrow waist. Then he went to the hem and drew it all the way up to my waist as well.

With my soppy pussy covered only by the wet panty hose and panties, he concentrated there again. He followed Tony’s lead by sliding his hands inside my sheer covering so he could attack my naked cunt. He spread my labia wide playing in the inner wetness so everyone could see and he thrust two then three fingers deep inside to thrill me and the panting audience. He pumped in and out rapidly for a few moments and brought me to a shuddering first orgasm for the night.

His hands moved out so he could grip the waist band of my sheer covering and quickly pushed my panty hose onto my thighs. Both hands went to the crotch of my sheer panties as he bent and angled my pussy up and opened the scene between my widely splayed thighs to my excited audience. He groped me roughly again as he thrust the fingers under my crotch and deeply into my spread pussy as he obscenely played in it.

“Ohhhhhhhh, I’m coming again. I cried. “Please fuck me with your hand, please fuck me hard!” 

I felt one of the worried participants try to cover my mouth in an attempt to quiet my passionate wailing. And squirmed away to beg for harder finger fucking, I wanted something bigger, something deeper in my hole. When Vince pulled the crotch of my panties aside so he could salaciously finger fuck me, it only ignited my hunger for more.

“More, Is that what you want bitch? Something big and long and hard, huh bitch? He asked into my ear that was red from his chewing.

“Yes!” I begged; “Fuck me with something huge, quick!” I pleaded.

He roughly pushed my panties to my thighs where my hose were already bunched, and then he spun me to face him. He looked into my eyes and resumed playing in my swampy mess as I spread my legs as widely as possible with the sheer restrictions to give him better access to finger fuck me with his whole hand and so the others behind could clearly see my swollen red pussy lips and his slimy fingers going in and out.

I turned my head and laid it against his chest so I could look down and see my naked parts and his fucking actions.

“Get my cock out bitch!” He ordered.

My body trembled as I finally realized he was going to fuck me here in front of this half crazed audience. Up until now, I was wrapped up being the center of attention in this exhibitionistic orgy of lust and I knew now that my strong and sexy puppeteer was going to provide his own show and I was going to get my pussy stuffed in the process.

I had felt his huge hard on throughout the night as it rumbled against my thigh and tummy in our foreplay of dance and was anxious to see it under the spotlight so to speak. I impatiently un-fastened his belt and pants and wrestled the zipper open and dived in to retrieve the prize. As my hand and fingers struggled vainly to fully grip it, my heart stopped as I tried to take measurement of its girth and length. I never dreamed a male penis could grow to this immensity and it took considerable effort to wrestle it into the open. 

There’s no way I could estimate its length and circumference, from my experience now it must have been between 8 and 10 inches long and possibly as big around as the large end of a smaller baseball bat. I couldn’t imagine anyone being able to take that kind of monster inside of them and in spite of the liberal amount of lubrication that was almost starting to puddle on the floor beneath me, I knew I would do anything it took to have its full length in my begging vagina if it killed me in the process.

I slid what I could of my hand around the fat organ that stood upright between us, in spite of its obvious weight, and pumped it while I applied liberal amounts of the fuck fluid I gathered from between my legs, to fully lubricate it so it wouldn’t tear me apart. 

“You like that pole girl?” Vince said as he watched me worship it.

“Oh yes.” I whispered. “God it’s so big, I love it.” Then as I huddled into his chest and stared at it in lust, I said so I alone could hear, “Please fuck me, pleas fuck me, please fuck me.” And then loud enough for all, “FUCK ME WITH YOUR BIG BEAUTIFUL COCK VINCE. FUCK ME WITH IT NOW!” I said as my volume and passion increased.

“Get her pants off.” He ordered the crowd, and helpers quickly obeyed. They took off my shoes so they could remove my underwear completely, then with nothing encumbering me he lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He held me high to get his long cock into me and I could see well above the crowd and on across the dance floor. I saw Craig and Darla dancing and it didn’t register in my mind that they could have easily seen me as well. Darla did see me and smiled as she quickly turned Craig from vision and danced him further away.

Vince tried to achieve proper alignment naturally but we were too excited to work naturally together.

“Put it in me.” I hissed with impatience.

And Vince said to anyone, “Help me; line it up.”

I reached down with my right hand and grasped the straining juice covered cock and pulled it to my already gaping hole. I slid it up and down my slit to moisten the tip again and then with surprisingly little effort started it in. Out of lust I tried to pull myself down onto it once I sensed its initial accurate penetration. Vince lowered my body inch by fucking inch onto his oiled shaft. I had never dreamed anything could fill me so obscenely and I made gurgling sounds as I settled down onto the monster fuck pole. I bit the side of his neck in passion that brought deep red color to his flesh. It would certainly leave a mark showing our lust.

I wailed out a strangled sound that was muffled by my biting that revealed how thoroughly I was being fucked. I could barely stand the sensations as my body was wracked in an endless procession of mind blowing orgasm that visibly rippled through my body. I could feel the knobby end pounding way up in my stomach and thought in my mind that it would spear me all the way through.

We settled into a delicious rhythmic motion in which he bounced me fully up and down on his spear and my head thrashed about wildly as we played to our lust crazed audience. I was happy as I looked out over the revelers on the dance floor at the highest point of the bouncing and wondered wickedly how many of them knew how fully stuffed with sex I was. 

He bounced me on his fat prick for a short period that seemed like an hour in my intensity until his action became much more feverish and urgent. I knew he was building to his own climax but since we were joined, I felt like an extension of his lust crazed mind. Although it seemed I was always in my own climax of, I felt myself build to his as well, and when he stiffened and arched his back to expel a full load of his fuck juice into me, I felt like I was an imploding black hole that was trying to suck and draw everything out of him he could give.

After I had milked the last of his juice from his swollen balls he finally settled into a soft swaying motion that carried both our bodies into a partial state of rest. I needed to recuperate but in spite of my heady orgasms, my need seemed insatiable and I wasn’t through. I had been filled fully with the big one, but I loved Eddy’s more modest size just as much and right now all I knew is that I needed more cock. I still wanted to be fucked! And our group knew it as well. I felt another set of arms take hold and climbed quickly into another hot embrace.

“High fuck bunny.” Phil said as he held me close. “Eddy told me you were back, but I didn’t know you were ‘really back’ you were.”

“Phil!” I exclaimed. “I didn’t know you were here.” I said and threw my arms around him and kissed him passionately.

“Darla said she invited you and your ‘future husband’! Where the hell is lover boy anyway?” Maybe I should bring him over here a show him how his future wife likes to FUCK!” He said.

“Shit Phil, DON’T YOU DARE!” I demanded.

I had gotten so wrapped up in this scene, I had forgotten all about Craig, and I was afraid that Phil may do just that. He could be a sadistic prick if he wanted to, but I still loved all we had done and how nasty he treated me, but as much as anything, I wasn’t ready for this sexy scene to end, and I knew it would if Phil actually followed through on his threat.

“Make it worth my while to keep your dirty little secret?” He asked as a rhetorical question wanting to get straight to the ‘how’.

I threw my arms around his neck again and kissed him deeply using my tongue to fuck his throat. He was holding me here on a dance floor as I stood barefoot and almost naked; I backed away slightly and giving a sexy shimmy pushed the dress from my hips and off, then I kicked it carelessly away. I went back into his arms and whispered in his ear hotly, “Fuck me Phil, Fuck me right here, right now”. I pleaded. “I need a hard cock I need to have you fuck me here in front of them.” I said as I gestured over my shoulder toward the others. 

In my lust, I had forgotten about Craig again until Phil reminded me. 

“Darla’s keeping lover boy over there company, come ‘ere.” He said. I automatically looked down and saw his erect cock bobbing in open air before me. I licked my lips and I jumped up into his arms as I wrapped my legs around his waist like I had done with Vince, (I’m a quick learner I thought to myself as I reached for his cock to aim it home). With Vince’s cum now added to my fuck juice there was so much lubrication flowing out of me onto his cock, there was more than enough to grease his entry.

Phil’s member was not nearly as large as Vince’s but it was bigger than Eddy’s. All I know is that it was hard and hot and that was enough to make me cream from its entry. As far as I was concerned, a large size was not an automatic magic ingredient for sexual pleasure. Desire, lust and imagination were the real aphrodisiacs for me. A sense of danger along with the ingredient of daring or good old fashion nastiness were all the mental and emotional tools I needed to drive me over the edge toward insatiable lust and fulfillment.

Phil’s cock felt wonderful pushing inside me. He groaned loudly as he fully sheathed himself saying, “God Cyn, you’re so tight I can’t believe it. Your pussy’s so fucking hot. You’re going to suck the head off of my dick.” 




Loosing Cynthia Ch. 02



At her Worst Behavior

Additional note following Craig’s discovery:

“I wanted to give him some idea of what I was capable so he would feel freer to take sexual liberty or push me a little more.”

Those of you who have been following my story may wonder how in the world I could possibly bottle up the extreme sexual promiscuity that seemed to rule my life in high school and college, especially since there was such a strong link to unfaithfulness in my relationship with Craig. If I showed such weakness to sexual temptation, why didn’t I literally radiate a predilection to moral vulnerability that would have been like a red flag in a bullfighting arena to any predatory male walking the street? After all, hadn’t I already proved how easily I could be seduced by anyone with an inclination to get into my panties?

During the drive from Helena after the holidays, I lay on the front seat with my head next to the passenger door and rested as I listened to the droning of the tires. I couldn’t stop the vacillation between thinking of the good things I hoped would be with Craig and the memory of the wicked things I seemed to attract whenever I turned around. Even as I lay there I hoped that I was revealing my legs and shapely rear to Craig, and that he would notice and take liberties with me confidence.

The more I thought about it the more I squirmed around pretending to wrestle for comfort until I knew he could see everything any man could hope for. When I felt his hand touch my stretched out thigh and the warmth of his palm as he moved his hand over my nylon covered skin, I almost swallowed my tongue. My heart beat and my pussy flooded when he slid his fingers to the warmth between my legs. 

Impatience made me move my legs to give him more access, and he quickly withdrew. When I couldn’t wait any longer for him to resume, I sat up close to him, and looked into his face while he pretended to stare at the road ahead. He knew I was looking at him and couldn’t speak, I was sure he was trying to decide if I was angry with him. I took his right hand and pulled it to me and held it with both of mine to reassure him I was not. I was not sitting on the left side of my skirt so I pulled the loose material to re-expose my outer thigh and laid his warm hand on the top of my leg.

While I searched for expression in his face, I pulled his hand upward and opened my legs to help him explore the round warmth under my direction. I pulled his hand up and in until his fingers grazed the crotch panel covering my steamy mound. With my right hand I gathered up my skirt and pulled it to the right and up until both legs were fully exposed as well as the panty top of my nylon hose. Using my right hand again I hooked my thumb into the waist band of my hose and pushed it down and out so I could use my left hand to move his to my flat tummy just above my pubic thatch.

Craig just had to take some damned initiative on his own now or I wouldn’t know what to do. I let go of his hand, and after an agonizing minuet, he finally started to move his fingers through the soft curly hairs of my bush. 

He kept moving slowly and I settled down into the seat and slowly spread my thighs wide. I thought I was going to die from lust and excitement when his fingers brushed along the sensitive folds around my clit. Dwn he moved until he could feel the wetness between my lips, and when he slipped first one, then two tentative fingers into my wet hole, I shivered, threw my head back and shuddered in the most important climax of my life.

I think the evidence of my orgasm scared Craig and he quickly pulled his fingers out and then soon after drew my skirt back to cover my legs modestly. We both felt guilty and said very little during the remainder of the drive. I basked in the warmth of hope that this would bring us closer together and provide a foundation that would end my worry about his sexual imagination. 

The day after we got back however, Craig told me how he had been wracked with guilt about playing with my pussy in the car and begged my forgiveness. Under the circumstances I couldn’t tell him how much I had wanted him to take that step, and now I was devastated at the thought that there would be no more; much more than that I saw an insurmountable gulf between the good and honorable man he was and the worthless slut I had become. My self esteem had taken a beating, now I couldn’t imagine how I could ever become the honest, spiritual, good woman he deserved.

With each passing day I became more and more resolved to the certainty in my own mind that I wasn’t really worth much, and couldn’t be considered a suitable prize for any eligible bachelor, let alone Craig Jamison.

There was only one episode in our relationship that I glossed over too quickly because it was in essence the worst of the worst that brought me to the brink of destruction where I might have lost myself totally forever. Craig asked me about it in the first hours of rebuilding our marriage. It concerned another guy I saw, intimately, during my semi-engagement to Craig. His name was Rick Madsen. 

Craig knew that I had seen him on a number of occasions during a semi-break up of our engagement, and that Rick had fucked me, he saw us the last time we did it when we were in Rick’s car outside my apartment, Craig and I had talked about him before we got married, but he had never pressed to know how much fucking went on with us or any of the details. During the first moments of reconciliation following my terrible mistakes and infidelity late in our marriage Craig finally asked me how extensive the sex was. My simple answer was ‘a lot’. 

That answer falls miserably short of reality, and in the effort to come clean on everything with Craig I decided to add this epilogue. Maybe this will also help explain to you how I was able to quit ‘cold turkey’ for the first 18 years of my marriage. I don’t think it can explain how I eventually fell off the wagon head first into unbridled sex and was willing; once again, to risk everything I had invested my heart and soul into.

Let me get back to the point in my story that takes us to the influence of Rick in my life. Craig’s method of courtship was based completely on honesty and respect. Any good girl should have wanted nothing more, but it did nothing to give me hope or optimism concerning my sexual needs, so I masturbated every day, sometimes more than once to keep my lust in check. I know now the masturbation actually increased the need for sex rather than alleviating it. I think my hunger signals started to radiate from me so anyone with a ‘seeing eye’ could notice.

About that time I became aware a guy who couldn’t seem to take his eyes off of me. Somehow I knew he had picked up on my hunger like someone listening to the tummy growl of a hungry person. I knew he could sense my sexy side and wanted to play and in spite of the way I felt about Craig, I knew in my heart I couldn’t make it work between us and that this stranger was going to have me. Every time he was near my nipples became erect and almost hurt with need.

One day he cornered me and said he had been watching. “I know.” I said. 

“I knew you wanted to meet me.” He said. “My name is Rick Madsen.” He took my hand at first like he was going to shake it, but he held it in both of his and fondled it erotically. The mild calluses were appropriate and indicated strength, but the touch was sensual.

“What makes you think I wanted to meet you Rick Madsen?” I asked almost choking on my own nerves.

“You’re hot, and I can feel it. You want someone to play with.” He said with a bold confidence that both frightened and excited me.

“I think you’re mistaken, I’m engaged to be married, so I’m not interested.” I responded with pretended firmness.

“Well then lover boy isn’t taking very good care of you honey. Every time I see you, your headlights are on.” He said and the look in my eyes must have told him I didn’t understand his reference. “Your nipples are always hard as rocks and big too. I don’t know how much longer I’m going wait to see them without all the clothes you wear.”

I felt almost naked from his comments about things he seemed to know he was going to see, and I just stared at him with an open mouth.

“Now here’s what you’re going to do, by the way it’s Cyn isn’t it?” He said. I answered with a slight nod. “You’re going to tell lover boy to take a hike or at least that you’re going to need a little freedom or vacation for a while, I have no interest in taking his place, I’m just going to fill in temporarily in his husband like duties, understand?”

I just stood there and numbly nodded my head. Her turned me around to send me on my way but paused a moment when he squeezed my ass cheek and ran his fingers deeply into the separating crack before he patted me on my rump and gave me a slight push to say go. He told me he wasn’t going to wait for long before he found me and if necessary took me away from Craig. All that the threat implied scared me and made my crotch wet with pussy juice.

I could feel the squishy wetness in my crotch as I walked and knew I would hardly be able to wait to let him have his way. The next time I was with Craig I explained that I was troubled with uncertainties about our relationship and that I thought we owed it to ourselves to make sure before we went any further. All of this was true with or without Rick in the picture and I thought my argument was reasonable. I told him I thought we needed to date others for comparison until the doubts disappeared.

He thought that was a stupid idea, and as I sit here writing this down now, I agree, but my pussy had gotten in the way, and I was determined one way or another to let Rick fuck me. Maybe fuck me a lot and this would make it happen. I was firm in my decision and Craig’s principals allowed me to choose for myself.

I could hardly wait to get back to Rick and even though it was late after Craig left for his apartment, I went over to the rec center where I had seen him Rick hanging out hoping I might find him. The place was almost deserted as I wandered around, and then I saw him. He had already noticed me and was watching me as I walked around. Without pretence I walked straight to him. 

He was sitting at the end of a couch with some of his buddies and didn’t bother to get up when I approached. He took the time to briefly introduce me to his friends. Josh and George were sitting on the couch with him. Smitty was in a chair and Tim had his knee on one of the chair’s arms as he relaxed standing. 

I stood at the end by Rick and as he introduced me he drew me close by taking hold of my left leg by my knee and pulling me toward him. When I was close his reach was improved and he slowly stroked my leg from low on my calf to about six inches above my knee during introductions.

His stroking definitely indicated familiarity, even intimacy and as I watched all their eyes concentrated on what Rick was doing, I felt hot and knew I was getting wet. Rick explained that I was engaged but had decided to become temporarily available for his amusement. When he asked me if that was true and that I had made arrangements with my fiancé, I nodded yes and looked down at the floor.

“Are you excited about getting to know me better Cyn?” He asked, and as he did his hand went much higher on my thigh, stopping about an inch below my crotch before moving down again. I continued to stare at the floor, but I was flushed as I nodded yes. “Gooooooooood,” he drawled out while his hand traveled all the way up to push firmly against my wet pussy. I choked, bit my lip and colored bright red and I squinted my eyes when he made contact and everyone knew what he was touching and how much I wanted him to do it.

“Does that feel good Cyn?” He asked as he made it obvious he was fondling my pussy freely beneath my skirt. He noticed the others looking intently and said, “I think we’re being selfish Cyn, these guys can’t see what we’re doing and how much you’re enjoying it.” I couldn’t believe what was happening so fast. Even though it was late we were in an open area of a public rec center and anyone could walk by without us knowing they were coming.

“Pull you dress up Cyn, so we can all see what I’m doing to you with my fingers.” Rick was smiling and I was out of control, as my body felt like it was on the verge of orgasm. With my hands on my thighs, I started to gather material into my fingers and the hem crept up. When it was half way up and I could curl my fingers under the hem, I pulled up as we all watched my naked uncovering. When it was at the widest portion of my thighs I was afraid it wouldn’t hold itself up so I pulled higher until it hung loosely bunched around my waist.

Rick didn’t hold back at all as he fondled the open wet area between my pussy lips and even tried to push his fingers through the cotton fabric of my panty into my soggy cunt. Rick wormed his fingers into the leg opening and slid them along the length of my swollen wet lips while everyone watched. Then he pushed one, two then three fingers into my wet vagina, while I chewed on my lips to stifle the cries trying to get out. 

I was lost in lust at the delicious feeling of being played with, and my head thrashed around in passion. “Ohhh please fuck me. I need it so bad, just fuck me pleeeeeeease.”

“Shit Rick, you said she was hot, but I never dreamed.” Tim said as he stood and then stooped to get the best possible view.

The idea that I was being handled and played with sexually in public by a guy I hardly knew was too much. All this happened while four others I knew even less watched, and my fiancé was tucked away safe in his apartment. In near desperation I shoved my panties and hose down to my feet and hobbled to the chair where Smitty sat. I leaned forward placing a hand on each arm and turned back to look at Rick, “If you want me, then make me cum god damn it. Shove something in my pussy and make me cum.” I hissed through gritted teeth.

Rick didn’t have to asked twice. As he moved quickly behind me he placed his hands on my naked waist and pushed my dress on up and over my shoulders and head so it became like a blindfold to me. I knew how nakedly I was exposed with my body completely nude except for my bra and the blindfold of my dress on my arms. “Ahhhhhggggnnnnhhh, I groaned as my cunt and tits were devoured a hands and fingers and I knew that the others had joined in.

My tits were wrestled from the bra and mauled roughly and my nipples were pinched and bitten as Rick and his friends devoured my body with their fingers and mouths. My naked flesh was jerking visibly I was screaming in orgasm as someone shoved material from my dress into my mouth to stifle the noise of my climax.

You and I might both think that the extreme nature of this reckless exhibition and raw sex was simply due to the high level of frustration and expectation I had acquired through almost two months of restraint and denial against the respectful relationship between Craig and I, but if this were the case, the release in the rec center should have expelled the excess energy and let me come back toward control, but that was not the case. Twice over the next several days either I sought out Rick or he came to me and we fucked like rabbits. 

I knew he was on the wrestling team and he told me he was in practice until late morning one day in the PE building. My need made we wait outside the locker rooms hoping to catch him. When he came out he knew I was turned on and needed a cock. We went into a seldom used corridor where boxes containing seasonal equipment were stored, and chair racks stood to handle overflow seating for the small auditorium. 

At the far end of the boxes Rick took off all my clothes and dropped his pants while he leaned me back against the wall and fucked me to climax while I wrapped my legs around him. All the while I kept looking down the hall and actually praying for someone to come and watch. 

Two days later late in the afternoon when I got home from school before, he came to my apartment. Once again there was no pretence about the only thing he had come for. My roommate was in our bedroom, but that was alright since it was against rules for a girl to entertain male callers in there anyway so we went into the kitchen to talk. I was starting to get nervous about his reckless efforts to fuck me whenever he wanted and thought it may be necessary to set some boundaries.

As soon as I stopped in the kitchen he backed me into the counter and once again took off every stitch of clothing I had on except for my shoes. I was terrified that my roommate would come out and find me like that or that one of my other roommates would come home, but the fear just made me hotter. He still had all his clothes on, but he undid his belt and pants and dropped them to he knees so his big fuck toy could get out and I could guide it into my hungry cunt. 

He lifted me to the counter and I was just ready to guide it into my hole when the phone rang. I let it ring twice before I realized that if my roommate Carol answered it and it was for me she would come out and find me like this. I jumped down and raced across to the wall phone and grabbed the receiver from the hook. I heard two voices. One was Carol’s and the other was Craig’s. “Hi honey.” I said and then quickly added. “Hang on a second will you. CAROL!” I yelled loudly to make sure she heard. “I’ve got it, hang up the extension.” I had to stop her before she came all the way into the kitchen.

I pushed Rick out of the way and stuck my head around the wall that screened off the kitchen so I could see the hallway to the bedrooms. Carol was just coming out the door and would soon be the few steps between the sunken bedroom level and the living room area. I showed her I had the phone in my hand and said I’ve got it, but she didn’t turn around and go back down the steps. I panicked as I guessed she was headed to the kitchen for a drink or snack. 

She must have seen my bare shoulder along with my head and stopped short as she quickly considered what to do. Finally she turned around without saying anything and started slowly back down the stairs. That’s when I looked at the floor where she had been looking and saw my blouse and bra. I felt hot, embarrassed and sexy as hell when I knew what she must be guessing.

I almost forgot Craig was still on the phone; Rick was still playing with me; pinching my nipple firmly with one hand and finger fucking me with the other. Rick’s ministrations had kept me aroused and now I had to deal with the effects of his sex play while I talked with my Craig on the phone. “Sorry honey, I – was – just – tryinnng – to – tell – Carrrooolll – I had – your call.” I managed between panting breaths. Rick was filling me with his fucking fingers as I leaned on the counter just inside the kitchen. He had my legs spread wide and was forcing as much of his hand quickly in and out of me as he could.

I was dizzy with lust and couldn’t think. Thank heaven Craig was in a hurry also. “Sounds like you’re busy hon, just wanted to make sure you’ll be ready when I get there in an hour. We can’t be late for the dinner.” He said.

“Oh fuckin shit.” I said holding my hand over the mouth piece as Rick drilled into me. He had curled all his fingers together so he could fuck me hard and fast with his fattened fingers and stimulate my clit with his thumb I felt so full with his deep plunging digits that I couldn’t help fearing and imagining what it would be liked to be fully and deeply fucked with a whole hand.

“What did you say Cynthia? Did you hear me” He asked. “Will you be ready?”

I mustered all of the control I could and tried to push the obscene things Rick was doing to me into the background as I feebly said. “I unnnnderrrstand, I’lllll be rrreeeeeady. Gotta go!” and hung up. “Oh gaaaaawwddd Rick fuck me you dirty son of a bitch, fuck me hard. Shiiiitt it feeeeeeellls sooooooo fuckin gooooooood. 




Loosing Cynthia Ch. 02



I wasn’t concerned when he fumbled for a stick of butter Carol had pulled out of the fridge to soften just before I got home. He picked up the entire stick and smeared it around my ass. As the butter melted and ran around my anus and down to his fucking hand the lubrication felt good and made the sexy stimulation feel even better. He pushed the cube against my puckered ass hole and it felt good along with all the other sexy sensations that encompassed me. He pushed it all the way into my rectum and my ass stretched easily to accept it. This wasn’t the first time my ass had been violated.

I had been consumed with several mighty orgasms already but Rick wasn’t about to let me have a period to get over the high level of sensitivity that usually follows directly after one. He just kept on assaulting me and I was too lost to want it any other way. With my ass thoroughly lubricated, he pulled me back so I ended up lower and pulled his hand out of me enough so he could bury his cock deeply into my slippery ass. He couldn’t hold out very long until he emptied a full load of semen deep into my bowels, and I came when I felt the hot fluid filling me up.

When he pulled out he sat down on a chair, turned me around and forced me to my knees. “Clean it off and make sure you get all of the cum out of it bitch he ordered. His treatment was humiliating but it only added to the reckless spell of arousal I was already under. It should have made me sick to put that dirty shaft in my mouth. In spite of the butter that had prepared the way there was a pungent aroma that would have nauseated me under other circumstances. I put my lips around his pole and moved my mouth as far down the shaft as I could without choking. 

When I started to lift off of it he placed his hands on the back of my head and forced me to take even more of his length. I gagged the first few times at the bottom of the down stroke as the thickness of his penis filled my throat, but eventually I learned to not try to breathe at that time. I was amazed that I could take almost all of his length and when I felt his pubic hairs tickle my nose I actually felt proud of what I could do.

Occasionally I would come all the way off his shaft and lick its length with my tongue then nibble at his balls. I quickly swallowed his full length again to demonstrate my skill while I tried to look into his eyes as much as possible, and I played with his scrotum to encourage his complete release. When I felt his hips thrust and rise impatiently I knew he was close and I was prepared to pull off of him and let him shoot his cum on my face and naked tits. That’s not what he wanted and when he knew he was starting to ejaculate, he grabbed my hair and pulled himself all the way into my throat. 

I was short of breath and not prepared and he held me for such a long time in that suffocating position I got dizzy and thought I might faint. Then I felt hot jets of cream shoot against my throat and I swallowed gulp after gulp of the copious cum into my belly. At least thirty five minuets had passed since Craig’s phone call, and I had completely forgotten about my promise to be ready. I was sweaty, my hair was a mess and my breath smelled like shit as the time dawned on me. 

“Shit Rick,” I said. “Get the hell out of here; I’ll never get ready in time.” I hissed. 

‘Take it easy bitch. I’ll tell you if you don’t have enough time. Just remember the main course right now is this,” he said as he pointed to his softening cock. “This is the only thing you need to be on time for and don’t forget it. Make sure when you go to class tomorrow your panties stay here. In fact I want you to stay completely naked under your dress until I fuck you tomorrow. Understand?” Who knows, you may just give lover boy a cheap thrill too.”

I started to put my clothes on so I could go to my room and shower but he snatched my panties and bra from me and said, “I’m serious whore, no underwear.” We walked into the living room together and Carol was in the hallway downstairs when she looked up. Rick was handling my lingerie and Carol saw it. He smiled at her and turned for the door. “Don’t forget he said.” When he left he had my underwear with him.

My blouse was white and not very heavy so there was no way to hide the dark definition of my aureoles and the erect stiffness of my excited nipples as I walked toward Carol. “Nice outfit”, she said simply with an accusing smile as I went past her into the bedroom to get clothes for this evening before heading for a very quick shower.

In the brief refreshment of the shower’s spray my first instinct was to wash away all the evidence of my cheating and Rick’s nasty fucking in the kitchen but then the sexual side told me to hold back and keep a little evidence to remind me and stimulate my imagination throughout the evening ahead with Craig. A nasty dirty feeling made me shiver as I thought of spending the next few hours with my boyfriend while evidence of my unfaithfulness ran down my leg.

I dried off and slipped the green dress I had chosen over my head making sure I was following Ricks order for no underwear. Uncharacteristic of me I opted out of my panty hose as well so I could remain completely naked underneath. The dress fit snugly enough over my bosom that erect nipples would be hard to hide, but I had no intention of suppressing the erotic thoughts that would surely make them hard.

Craig had asked me to attend a dinner with him that was sponsored by the Church unit he was closely involved with. Everyone there dressed the way they would to go to Church on Sunday and from outward appearance, I fit in. 

I certainly hadn’t come to despise my religion, I was just overpowered by the erotic images, thoughts and desires that I couldn’t escape, either awake or in my dreams. It seemed I was enveloped by a constant sexual appetite that made me look for sex where ever I was no matter what the situation. As we stood around and visited during pre-dinner appetizers, I couldn’t keep from thrusting my breasts against the dress to try and show evidence of my hard nipples. If we relaxed on one of several couches around the room, my knees were never less than two inches apart and if the opportunity to show more came up, I did, purely by accident of course.

Occasionally I noticed one of the young men who had seen something in me he knew he shouldn’t and looked away nervous and flushed. Inevitably the same young man would end up trying hard to look again without being noticed to make sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks. I think one guy almost passed out when he was looking up my skirt and I caught him. I noticed him and in the process of crossing my leg, I swung them open much further than necessary while raising the one over the other, when he looked into my eyes he saw me looking right back with a naughty smile. I’m certain he saw my black pubic bush plainly, but he probably thought I was just careless in letting him see black panties.

As we set in small groups around individual tables, Craig was by my side, but my lusty imagination hoped that the man on my other side would pull up my dress and finger my pussy the way Rick had earlier. When the dinner plates were cleared, I asked Craig if he could excuse me. I told him I needed to use the restroom and take an aspirin for a headache. He asked if we needed to leave and I said no, not at all, I just needed a little quiet time to myself during desert and the discussion portion. I told him I would be back later and gave him a peck on the cheek as I left.

I didn’t need the restroom; I suspect it was more like trolling for something sexy. There were people in small groups or singles all over the place, but there was no way of knowing which might provide a good opportunity for fun and games. I noticed an area out of the traffic lane with a small grouping of two seater couches around a low center table that looked like an area set up for study seclusion or for reading. There was one guy sitting there by himself. He wasn’t a hunk, but he did look nice.

I picked up a magazine from a stand nearby and carried it into the couch grouping. I decided to not be obvious by sitting directly across from him and instead took a seat on the couch to his left. I made a point out of getting comfortable by scooting my bottom forward to the edge of the couch and then placing my feet on the low tale in front of me. With my knees high like that it was obvious that anyone sitting opposite would be able to see the backs of my naked legs, maybe even my panties or more (In my case it would be less).

I could tell he was looking but he was obviously frustrated by what he was missing. He shifted to the far end of his couch like he was trying to get comfortable. Now at least he was getting a better preview, but he still couldn’t see the main feature. He had to shift his pants a bit, so I knew he was getting stiff, and whether it was obvious or not he got up, went to fountain for a drink and to manage his erection before he returned.

This time he sat on the couch opposite me. I let my knees sway together right then left so he could get the best views possible. Then I stopped and looked straight at his face. His eyes were locked on the dark area between my legs, and I reached down with my right hand and pressed it against my dress and hip. 

Using my hand I gripped my ass cheek through the green dress and pulled so that I opened my crack and the lips of my pussy to my watchers gaze. He knew this was intentional and his eyes snapped up to meet mine. We stared at each other and there was no doubt in his mind that I was inviting him to inspect and enjoy my open sex. I smiled and his gaze dropped again to my fingers that had crept to my opening and were playing along the length of my slit.

I nodded down with my eyes at his cock and he moved a tentative hand to grip his swelling penis. I liked my lips sexily and moved my hand to my dress. I pulled the fabric toward my tummy and soon it slipped lightly to my waist, then I deliberately placed one then the other high heeled foot on separate corners of the table. My feet were about three feet apart so I spread my knees as well and now my naked pussy was completely open to his view.

I nodded to his cock again and he took the hint by undoing his pants so he could fish out his rigid prick. Although he himself looked inconspicuous, or nondescript, his cock was not. It was a good 7 inches long and at least a handful in thickness. I knew when ever I got in a situation like this it didn’t matter if I only planned to tease and flash. I just did not know how to stop, nor did I want to. 

I gathered up my dress and rose up so I could pull it higher and higher until I could show him my naked aching tits and nipples as well. Now all of my naked features were fully exposed to him and I started to masturbate and encouraged him to pump his cock as well. At the far ends of the corridors that led to this secluded area I could see people moving around and the danger of my nasty exposure moved me quickly to climax with the thrill of possible discovery. My nameless partner came at about the same time, mostly I’m sure, from watching and looking at me.

We both came at about the same time and pulled ourselves together so we looked quite normal again. I stood and as I passed by him on my way back to Craig, I lowered my face to his and kissed him erotically on the lips and forced my tongue into his mouth. When I broke away, I looked at him satisfied and happy. “I’m Cyn.” I said, as I walked away.

I returned to Craig and felt the wickedness that now seemed normal as I walked to his table and sat down. The insides of both thighs were cool from the wetness left by my own arousal and sweat that ran down them, and I felt like the cheating slut I I felt I was. God I loved being nasty, and almost engaged nasty was the best, you know what they say, the higher you are the harder you fall, and I was learning to love the fall.

I was happy to be a secret slut inside while I deceived the world and my Craig with the exterior polyester picture of purity. I smiled at the thought of what a clever con artist I was and felt more naked than ever as I tried to reveal my excitement by making my naked nipples grow hard against the soft dress.

Craig was still working so hard at trying to be the controlled respectful gentleman he thought he had to be and I wanted to make him suffer by exposing as much of my naked lust as I could, without melting the polyester. I pulled his hand to my hot inner thigh whenever I could, and now that Rick made me keep it naked as well it made it all the better. My pussy creamed with the memory of sex and the thought of how fun it would be to tell Craig that my sex master was making me stay naked under my dress so he could fuck me whenever he wanted.

Early the next week Craig and I were sitting in his car after taking in a movie as we talked and respectfully made out for 45 minuets while sitting in his car, before he opened my door for me to walk me to the entrance of my unit. We were holding each other as we kissed passionately again, as I opened my eyes and looked over Craig’s shoulder during the kiss and saw Rick walking quickly toward my apartment. My blood raced and my nipples hardened as I imagined him taking me with his big cock while I kissed my fiancé, but reality was demanding urgent action to keep my wicked little secrets.

I quickly broke the kiss and said, “We’ll I better be getting in honey.” Craig said, “Yea, I guess, see you tomorrow after class?” “After school,” I said simply, feeling desperate for him to leave before there could be a possible confrontation between my wicked self and the nice one. I didn’t even wait and watch while he drove away. I ducked inside and shut the door to create a time barrier between Craig’s goodbye and Rick’s hello. 

One of my roommates was sitting on the couch with her boyfriend and I sensed that I was interrupting another ‘respectful make out session’ inside. I couldn’t just say hi, and sorry, and then leave; I knew Rick would be knocking quickly. At the same time I wanted enough time to pass so Craig would be safely gone before I opened the door to talk to Rick. I heard the quick rapping on the door and froze. Peggy and her guy watched me wondering why I wasn’t moving to answer it.

Finally I opened it. Rick was getting ready to rap again, but instead grasped me by the back of my neck and pulled me partially through the door. I could still see the bright taillights of Craig’s car as he sat stopped waiting for a break in the light traffic. Rick was already kissing me fiercely with his tongue swabbing my opened mouth while I sucked it deep. His other hand was already pulling up my dress so he could confirm my obedience.

I felt my hem slipping quickly up the backs of my legs and new the two inside could see everything that was coming in to view, so I quickly pulled the door closed behind me. By the time it was safely shut the front of my dress was almost to my tits and the back revealed my shapely naked ass. I looked again and Craig’s car had just started to turn to the right into the road. I thought Rick would stop at least by the time my tits were exposed, but no, he pulled the dress all the way over my head and off my arms. I was totally naked standing outside of my apartment door in the illumination of the entrance light.

“Fuck Rick, what are you doing?” I said in excited panic. “I missed you and needed another fuck before bedtime.” He said with a nasty grin on his face.”

“Shit Rick, not right here please.” I said then thinking quickly added, “Peggy and her date are on their way out.” 

He stopped for a second and looked at my naked form, then nudged me quickly in the direction of the parking area at the side of our building. My dress was left on the grass by the side of the walk. When we got to the shadows he pushed me onto the hood of a car and spread my legs. He forced two fingers deep into me and then pulled them out and sucked the fingers into his mouth. “God,” he said. “You are so wet and sweet, I bet you’ve been going crazy waiting for me to get my cock into you again.” 

“Unghhhhhhhh, yeeeessssss,” I said. “Fuck me Rick; I’ve got to have your fucking cock.”

“You love this don’t you, you fucking slut?” He said while he pulled me from the car and backed me against a rough wall of the building. He already had his pants open and his hard penis looked like a spear held low as he advanced. I held my breath in anticipation and groaned in lust as my cunt devoured his hard shaft while I locked my legs around his waist and he fucked me wildly against the wall.

Hell, I thought, there’s no way I can get all of the fucking I want and so desperately need as I feasted on the nasty sensation of his big slick prick sliding in and out of my insatiable willing fuck hole. I refused to let myself cum again until I felt his semen filling me up. After he finished and filled me up, he carried me back to the car’s hood and sat me down. 

“I can’t believe what a slut you are.” He said. “You’re just getting started; you want to do allot more fucking don’t you?”

“Oh yes.” I hissed. Please don’t stop now, just fuck me more please, fuck me all night long.” I begged and begged.

“OK baby, you’re gonna get fucked more, lots more.” Rick said and I trembled with excitement.

He led me out of the shadows and across the lawn to the front sidewalk and walked me naked to his car, a few hundred feet down the down the little complex road where it was parked. I didn’t care if anyone saw me; in fact I wished the area was lined with people who could enjoy my nude form as I walked along. He put me in his car then walked back toward my apartment and picked something up before returning to me and driving away, then he threw my green dress to me and told me to put it on.

We drove to an area accessible to the college but too far away to be considered a good living location for most students. Rick pulled his car into the long driveway that led to two duplex units situated well back from the main road. He parked the car and we got out, by now I was less affected by arousal and had serious misgivings about what I had gotten myself into. Although the place didn’t look like a slum it did look like it would be popular with people who wanted privacy from the wrong prying eyes. He opened the door like he lived there and walked me into the front room. 

There were five or six guys inside and I felt conspicuous as Rick paraded me into the center of the group, some were students, some may have been a little older and almost all were standing as though they were just coming or going. They greeted Rick with high fives and bravado until they saw me close behind. A hush immediately followed and spread through the room as individuals noticed me. The red dress I wore made look even hotter in the casual setting.

The volume came back up as some of them whistled or made suggestive comments to show their approval. I was becoming excited and embarrassed by the flattery and wondered why Rick hadn’t taken me quickly through noisy males to his bedroom for more privacy. Rick was trying to get everyone’s attention, but I was being distracted by a couple of the guys standing close who were trying to cop a feel.

“Cyn, Cyn!” I heard my name being called above the volume by Rick. “Come over here Cyn.” He called to me, and I made my way to his side. “Here she is guys, have a good look.” While they were looking me over he brought his mouth close to my ear and asked which the light days in my class schedule were. “Tuesday and Thursday,” I answered since I only had one class beside personal library study. I wondered why he wanted to know.

He turned back to the group and announced, “Starting next Thursday, Cynthia will be here and available from noon to midnight on every Thursdays for your ‘entertainment’. I think everyone, particularly me, was confused at what that meant, but because of the highly erotic nature of our young relationship, and they things I said in the heat of sex outside my apartment my stomach churned with apprehension. 




Loosing Cynthia Ch. 02



Apparently the group of rowdy guys didn’t have trouble letting imaginations run wild as they started to whoop and holler in approval. Rick grinned as he let their minds work, and then he called for quiet. “All right you guys, I think you’ve can figure out how she can entertain us, but since it’s almost midnight already we need to take just a little time now to get to know and see Cyn a little better.”

He called for a chair and someone placed an empty one in the center of the room. He turned it to face the corner where a full sized couch and loveseat were grouped, then he directed the restless crowd to take seats somewhere in the grouping. “Cyn, I want you to sit here, on the chair.” He patted the wooden seat back as he spoke, and it was obvious that all of the attention was going to be centered on me. It made me nervous and at the same time excited and my hard nipples showed through my dress.

“OK guys I want to make this interesting, so we’re going to have an introduction auction, and for tonight only, I’ll accept IOU’s”, said Rick. “The first thing I’m offering tonight is the privilege to find out if these bumps you can see on her dress are tailor made visual effects, or a real part of Cyn.” I blushed deeply as he pinched the raised bumps through the material. 

I’m certain most women or even liberated college girls would have become angry or ran like hell, but in my frame of mind at that time, I was staying for everything. I could hardly think as I heard numbers called out, and almost too soon Rick hollered sold for $20.00 to Jim.” 

“Hell yea,” Jim shouted as he jumped up and swaggered over to my chair. Standing above me, he cold see further down into the scooped neck of my dress than anyone else, but he still pulled outward on my dress so he could clearly see the roundness of my breasts topped off with hard nipples. “Shit guys, the bumps really do belong to Cyn” He announced to the group. He almost seemed ready to sit down, but instead moved directly behind me and looked to Rick. “For $20.00, you get 7 minuets, and you’ve used two.” Rick said, then Jim slid both hands into the top of my dress and filled both with my nicely rounded breasts.

He massaged, pulled, pinched and squeezed them both for a couple more minuets and then tried to force the neckline lower so the others could see. There wasn’t enough slack in the material to expose my tits so he tugged up on the back and I automatically lifted up to reduce the resistance from the holding pressure of my body’s weight. The back loosened considerably, but the lower hem was pulled half way up my thighs in the process before my weight settled on the material again.

With the additional slack he could push my neck far enough down to pull both breasts out and expose them to the group. Visibility of my naked tits and nipples brought another chorus of cheers and another surge of juice from my pussy. He took the remaining time to suck both nipples into his mouth. If Rick hadn’t called time, I would have cum just from the attention to my titties alone; now I felt lost without the stimulus.

“Play with your nipples Cyn.” Rick said. “I want you to keep them hard.” “OK now, for the NEXT privilege, the bidder gets to see if she’s wearing panties. If she is he takes them off, if she isn’t he can finger her pussy and then pull her skirt up so we can all see how excited she is.” My urges made me swoon with dizziness and I wanted to throw my legs wide right now because I was too excited to wait, but I knew the anticipation was only going to make it better.

Everyone started yelling and the bidding ended at $35.00. I couldn’t believe that I was being sold off piece by piece, but it felt incredibly wicked and I loved it. Vinny was the winner and he sprang from the couch with enthusiasm to the task. “How long do I have?” He asked Rick, when Rick told him he had 10 minuets, he let out a yell and beat his chest. Vinny knelt at my knees which were being held uncharacteristically close together and ran his hands all over the exposed portion.

I thought my pussy must be so saturated, fluid would be running out in a stream onto the seat. My throat was dry and I was dizzy with lust as he started to slide his hands under the hem of my skirt and up my legs. Rather than heading between my legs directly to my crotch he stayed on the top portion of my thighs and when he reached the bend of my body at the top that transitioned to my smooth flat tummy, his eyes twinkled as he found no panty material. He let out another high pitched yell like a Spanish flamingo dancer and I think everyone knew that I was bare.

Vinny pulled his hands from underneath and directed me to stand. While everyone whistled and yelled, Vinny started pulling my dress upward. He paused when my pussy was still barely playing hide and seek to increase suspense. Then he resumed the unveiling while the noise became deafening and my pussy and black pubic bush were fully uncovered. 

The bottom of the dress was now around my waist while the top was still pulled below my breasts, not exactly my favorite display but arousing none the less. While I stood he urged my feet wider until they were about 30 inches apart. As he played around in my crotch at the roomy top of my legs, I arranged my clothing differently by pushing everything up to my neck so I was totally exposed from tits to cunt, and I could almost hide the obscene pleasure on my face in the material. 

I loved letting my watchers see as much bare skin as possible, and I was in heaven having Vinny play with my fanny while the others watched, it was so like the displays in Helena but even more arousing and unsettling because these guys were all strangers. I was willing to let them do anything they wanted. I realized that this was not an emotional issue, dealing with competing lovers; it was purely sexual. It didn’t matter who was playing with or fucking my pussy so long as it was being seen to, and Vinny was seeing to me well I thought as he brought me to another quivering climax..

Vinny sensed I was growing weak and settled me back onto the chair. A little nudge was all I needed to make me spread my legs as far apart as I could. Vinny went back to work immediately on my exposed pussy not daring to waste any of his ten minuets. It’s common for a woman to need at least a very short break after orgasm to get around the intense sensitivity, even if she is multi-orgasmic, but Vinny didn’t know or didn’t care.

When he resumed the intense finger fucking, I thought I was going to pass out. The combination of growing arousal during the sensitivity period of afterglow was divine torture, and when he lowered his mouth to bite, suck and nip at my clit I thought I would die and literally started to bounce on the seat of the chair with the overpowering sensation of another orgasm much more powerful now than the first.

When the flesh of my legs stopped shaking I slumped back on the chair, Rick spoke to the group saying, “If there was any doubt about Cyn’s willingness to enjoy what we’re going to be doing to her, I think it’s long gone now. So you’re not going to have to worry about whether she’ll holler rape or anything, this slut is dying to be fucked, she told me so before we got here.”

Here’s the deal, if anyone wants to fuck her on Thursday, it will cost you $50.00 for 30 minuets. You need to bring your own condoms, as many as you think you’ll need, and if I tell you something’s off limits, it is. If you want to watch, up close, it’ll cost $20.00 and you can beat your meat and cum on her without anyone giving you any shit, if you want a blow job, $30.00. We’ll be open for business from noon to midnight. Anybody have any questions?”

“What about anal?” Someone asked.

“Cyn has done it all, and she loves everything, just make sure you’re not a dumb ass and it should be OK. I personally don’t go for pain and bondage and I don’t think she does either so that’s the stuff that will be out of bounds.” 

I was in shock as I listened to him and scared shitless, but I was in no shape after the double orgasms to put up a fight. I would have to deal with Rick later. 

“Go ahead and have a feel on your way out and spread the word.” Rick said and while the guys filed out they each took time to sample as much of me as they could. I didn’t fight them off; I just spread my legs and filled both hands with the bunched material at my neck so I could hide my head in the fabric. I didn’t want anyone to know whether passion filled my eyes or exhaustion.

It was 1:15 in the morning before Rick got me to my apartment after I pulled the dress back over my naked body and walked to his car. Rick had me pull the dress back up the way it had been as we drove home so he could remember and made me stay that way until I was inside my apartment again with the door closed. I almost cried begging him not to make me do that but didn’t say anything, because I was afraid he would let me off the hook and my slutty side wanted me to take the risk. 

I prayed no one was in the living room when I walked in, because there was no way I could hide from them if they were, but when I found it empty, I was actually disappointed and kept my dress up until I was in my bedroom. When I heard Carol react from the light as I opened the door I quickly pulled the dress back down, and then when she became quiet again I pulled it off and climbed into bed.

When Carol got up the next morning I was turned away from her in my single bed and during the warm restless night I had kicked the covers far enough off of me so that she could tell I was naked. I was aware she was looking when she pulled the off of me and my eyes blinked open. That’s when I shivered mostly from the excitement of exposure, but she must have thought I was chilled and covered me back up. When I turned over to face her she blushed and said, “I thought you might be cold.” Then she asked, “Since when did you start sleeping in the nude?” A naughty smile played across her lips revealing the nasty thoughts running through her imagination.

“It just seemed easy last night, I was so tired.” I said as I threw the sheet and cover completely off and completely revealed my nakedness.

“Gosh Cynthia, have you no shame?” She said in pretended shock. I knew my appearance actually excited her because I could see how hard her nipples were through her large oversized T shirt. 

“You ought to try it.” I said. “Being naked is fun Carol.” While I spoke I toyed with the hem of her shirt pulling it up to reveal her white panties. “At least don’t wear these.” I said as I hooked my fingers into the waist band of her panties and pulled them down onto her thighs.

“Ahyyee!” She shrieked and jumped backward, but she didn’t pull them back up, instead with a naughty look in her eye, she pushed them further down until they fell to the floor, and then she stepped out of them.

A troubling thought crossed my mind as I looked at Carol; I had been willing to be exploited by others from the very beginning. Now I was so addicted to sex in any form and any time so much that I was now becoming an aggressor who was taking opportunities to find new requites to hedonism like Carol; a girl who was perfectly happy to be normal and chaste until she was cursed with a sexoholic roommate.

I jumped up quickly, grabbed my robe and headed for my morning shower, to effectively end the delicate situation I could see coming. As I looked back, Carol’s expression showed disappointment and that noticeable look of shame. While I stood under the shower spray I cried at the realization that some of the consequences of my addiction were being visited on those around me, and I was at a loss as to how I could change or stop things already in play, or if my addictions would even let me.

When I completed my shower and dressed I knew I had to get away from my apartment and my roommate without panties. I told Carol I had to go to the library to finish an assignment due next week, all true and accurate, and raced out the door. When I got to the library I found an area near the North windows on the third floor that overlooked the large grass mall. The mall was the effective center of campus and was crisscrossed with concrete walks to the various buildings around it.

I had been trying to study for almost two hours, and it had been difficult, to say the least, to keep my mind on track. Many of my thoughts were laced with exciting memories of the wall to wall sexual gluttony that my life had become accustomed to, and it was hard to keep from spreading my legs and masturbating while they played through my head. Many others dealt with the gravity of guilt I felt for the damage I was doing to myself and those close to my heart. I was thinking about Craig and how he might feel if he saw me in some of the settings that exposed my lust, when I felt a tap on my shoulder.

Startled I turned my head and almost groaned with exhaustion when I saw Rick standing ominously over me. I didn’t know how I could do with his dominating influence right then, but I hadn’t been able to develop a relationship of equality where I be myself. When he saw my expression, he knew I wasn’t happy to see him pounced on the opportunity to put me under his thumb. “You don’t look happy to see me babe.” He said, as he pulled a chair from the other side of the table and placed it in front of and facing me at the end of the table.

I said nothing, just slumped my shoulders as I felt the weight of his gaze. “You didn’t expect me Cyn. You should know I would find you whenever I wanted. Did you dress properly, like I told you to in your kitchen?

I trembled knowing I hadn’t, that day instead I put on a bra and pair of low waist bikini panties that I was wearing under a pair of nice slacks. I hadn’t planed on showing anything off that day, and had also worn a short sleeve light knit sweater in stead of a blouse.

“I see you’re not wearing a skirt or dress either so I’ll bet you thought you could get away without following the rules, isn’t that right Cyn?”

Rick had me pegged and I knew I couldn’t hide anything while I lowered my eyes and studied the top of the table.

“Stand over there in front of the window Cyn.” He said. He gestured to the wall of windows where you could look down on the view I described, and spoke with resolute firmness, without being loud or hostile.

I didn’t want to follow his instructions as I conjured up the nasty images of what he could make me do once he got me there, but in spite of it, I stood and walked to where he directed me. The habit of following directions was so strong, that I no longer had any idea of how to refuse. 

When I stopped, he stepped in front of me, between me and the window. My slacks fastened with a hook and zipper at the front and he pulled my sweater up enough so he could grip my waist with his fingers slipped inside. The backs of his knuckles rubbed along the bare skin above my low-riders and his nails were almost to my dark pussy hairs. I held my breath as he slid the fingers back and forth right to left and teased my sensitive privacy. Using his other hand to help he released the hook and then lowered the zipper. I thought it hissed like a siren as it slid down its track.

With my pants opened wide he moved out form between me and the window, and nudged me closer to the glass. The window faced the north so there was very little tinting in it and as close as I was, I knew I would be totally exposed to anyone who happened to look up. Now Rick came to stand behind me and made me wait for the inevitable when I felt his touch light delicately of the waist of my pants, just over my hips.

I held my breath as I felt him slowly start to push them down and part of me wanted desperately to stop him while the other demanded that he hurry. He eased them slowly over the wide part of my hips and then they started to drop faster until they were lying at my feet. Rick made me step out of them, which wasn’t too hard with my low 2 in. heels. He picked them up and folded them, then walked back to my chair by the table and set them down, all the time with me standing bare legged in front of the windows.

When he returned to stand behind me again he caressed my body, with his hands roaming over my panties, smooth tummy and even up to fondle my breasts and pinch my nipples through my bra; he wanted to heat me up before he took anything else off, and I was squirming with lust as he roamed my body. I had forgotten any protest from earlier and was simply enjoying what he was doing to me while I looked over the grassy mall below.

There weren’t a lot of students walking the paths because it wasn’t it wasn’t time for classes to change, but I knew it wouldn’t be long before the walks were covered with hundreds of people rushing from one class to another. Reason and sense had little influence over me when lust was involved, and right them Rick was taking control and my lust was helping him.

I stretched and moaned as Rick pushed my sweater up to uncover my breasts, and willing held my hands up so he could push it and my bra up and off my arms, completely uncovering my upper torso to anyone below. He petted with my exposed flesh for a moment pushing me even more into uncontrollability before he slipped his thumbs into my bikini waist and pushed them down so I could kick them off my feet.

Here I was, naked and ready to be fucked, standing in front of the open window on the third floor of the school library, while Rick continued to caress my bare skin and open his pants. I shivered when I felt his naked cock stabbing into my soft ass and back from behind, and reached back anxious to feel the thick meaty shaft. While I stroked him to greater hardness, I spread my legs and brought one foot to the seat of a near by chair. Opened as I was I urged him forward so he could stab his hot dick into me, rippled with excitement as I felt him slide his full length into my oiled hole.

Rick fucked me rapidly, anxious to cum before he got into trouble, I’m sure he had little concern for me. Nevertheless, his intensity spurred me on to orgasm at about the same time. Rick never bothered with condoms, didn’t think they were necessary for him, although he had insisted that anyone who paid him to fuck me would wear one, here again, I’m sure he was more concerned about keeping me free from STD’s for his sake than mine.

When he got his rocks of and emptied his load, he pulled out and made me stand in front of the window naked, looking out while he got himself back together. By now the walks were crowded and I was excited as well as concerned as I watched a small group of about six guys standing on the grass just off the concrete walk that ran below. They were talking between themselves and then looking up at the building. It was obvious they had seen me and were excited about my performance with Rick.

All of a sudden, the group broke apart and the guys al rushed into the building. I knew where they were heading and started to dress as quickly as Rick would let me so I could get out of there and hide in a restroom or something. He wouldn’t let me put my bra and panties back on and made me leave them where he threw them when he took them off. I gathered my books and supplies as quickly as possible and rushed from the area. I was just going into the restroom when I looked over my shoulder to see two of the guys reach the top of the stairway on a dead run and turn into the study area where I had been only moments earlier. In the restroom I sat on the toilet to let as much of Rick’s cum as possible run out of me so it could be flushed away and notices the dark streaks of wetness in the crotch and down the inside of one leg in my grey slacks.

My god, I thought, how in the world was I going to be able to get out of this sexual mess I was in. I had long since stopped thinking of how I could salvage my relationship with Craig; I was certain that was gone. I placed so little value on my own life, I never really stopped to think that getting me out of this mess would lead me to a happy conclusion with another guy, a nicer guy, it would be nothing more than putting an end to a chapter in my life I already felt was ugly enough.