0 comments/  14271 views/  4 favorites

Dating in These Times

By: EgmontGrigor2011



CHAPTER 1

Tim Cooke had a wet lunch with some other young attorneys and returned to his office, satisfied in general with his life but sour two of his lunch companions were married and the other two had enduring partners.

At the moment Tim didn't even have a steady and the two who were on tap were not the kind of girls a guy could take home to mother and expect to survive mother's hostile attack with her gin bottle.

Tim ran for a departing elevator and just made it in and faced a gorgeous brunette dressed in blue. 

Aware the babe could leave the car any time soon, Tim smiled at her and said hi and gripping low on her scooped neckline asked, "Do you mind if I take a look at your great-looking stack?"

She smiled and said icily, "Will this be your first experience in jail?"

Tim instantly accepted this woman had too much horsepower for him. Devilish behavior had no place out of college and was particularly inappropriate for anyone working for a law firm so morbidly stiff in the manner in which it projected itself publicly it almost gave the appearance of operating out of a crypt.

Perhaps it was.

Gee he hadn't thought of that before this.

He remembered he had an apology to make.

"I apologize miss. I mistook you for someone I know."

"Bullshit."

"Well spotted miss. Perhaps what I had for lunch over-boosted my testosterone levels?"

"Well watch what you eat in future."

God what he off the hook? 

The elevator stopped, Tim saw it was at the 11th and scuttled out and turned his face away from reception as he flitted past. He was almost at the door of his office when big tits, er Tiffany, called, "Oh Mr Cooke, your 2 o'clock appointment, Miss Carla Stone has arrived."

He turned with a professional smile but that evaporated when his saw Miss Stone was the brunette with curvaceous tits.

She hissed, "No way, I'm not being attended to by that jerk."

The other two women in reception came to the counter.

Tim, operating back in professional mode, said smoothly, "Don't worry ladies, it's a case of mistaken jerks. Come along Carla, I'm the only one here authorized to release your bequest."

"Is it money?"

"Yes and quite a tidy sum."

She walked to him muttering, "Keep your hands of me you jerk."

"Mr Cooke, should I call security?"

"No thanks Tiffany. Obviously some jerk has upset Miss Stone. I can handle her... er... I can calm her."

"Hi Carla just calm down and come through and get your check. Your breasts are safe from me with a guarantee they'll not be touched."

"Is that a promise?"

He smiled and said yes providing he wasn't provoked.

She snorted, he opened the door and she went past him warily.

He waved at the receptionists and said, "I feel safe."

"Please sit," he said and reached over his desk to pluck the folder on top of the pile and looked at Carla as he sat facing her and noticed she'd not pulled down her skirt. Hmmm well obviously he was free to admire her lower thighs but it appeared she was sensitive about her tits.

"Two forms of ID please."

She handed him her passport and Social Security card.

The twenty-eight year old said, "Hmmm you are twenty-six. Are you interested in dating me?"

"I have a boyfriend, well he lives next door."

"But would he be as exciting as you might think I could be?"

"H-he's a little timid."

"Oh like me?"

He laugh was more like a cackle.

"And he's not nearly as talkative and confrontational."

"And what is the situation about sex with this guy who lives next door?"

"Mr Cooke, I believe we are supposed to be discussing a legal matter."

"Oh yes Carla. Here are your documents back. I have established you are indeed Carla er...?

"Stone."

"Very good. That was a sly test."

He pulled out his cell phone and entered her name in his phone book. Your cell phone number please?"

"Why?"

"I can't date you unless I can contact you."

"I shouldn't be doing this... will you promise to be exciting?"

"I promise."

Tim entered the phone number as she called it out.

Carla's phone went. She dug into her bag for it saying, "Excuse me please."

"Carla Stone."

"Just testing."

She looked at Tim and laughed, showing great teeth and her breasts moved a bit. Very nice.

The transaction was completed and Carla prepared to leave with a check for $50,000 from her late Uncle Cecil.

"Um do we shake hands," she said uncertainly.

"No we kiss."

She kissed him lightly on the lips and appeared surprised she wasn't groped.

Reaching to open the door he said, "Don't date me unless you are willing to have sex on the first date Carla."

Her icy look returned.

Back at his desk, Tim checked the time and completed the file and placed it in the out tray.

He'd gone too far. Tim rated his chances of Carla dating him as being doubtful, possibly very doubtful. He'd probably have improved odds if he hit on her mom.

Wondering if Carla was a brunette between the legs, Tim called her.

"Carla Stone."

"Hi it's Tim Cooke."

"Who?"

"Um I'm Tim Cooke the attorney who's dating you this week. Some clown dubbed me Tim at high school and the name stuck although not with my family who wanted me to be known as Timothy."

"Well I suppose you can have any name you wish to keep."

"You are so wise Carla. When are we doing it?"

"Excuse me!"

"Dating?" he said, back-pedaling to recover ground. "What did you think I meant?"

"God you push to the brink Tim. My parents are expecting us for lunch on Saturday. Mom can't believe an attorney attempted to have sex with me in an elevator. She wishes to audit you to see if you are suitable to date her youngest daughter."

"Um I'm not sure I can make it."

Carla said grittily, "I was testing your humor. It appears to be thin. Seriously, I was thinking a movie and dinner on Saturday evening?"

"Oh great. Bring the guy next door if you wish."

"Thanks that thought had occurred to me and I'd feel safer."

"Eh?"

"Tim other people are entitled to possess humor. Do you want sex with me or not?"

Tim was sweating. So he tried diplomacy. "I'd love to take you to a girly movie and then to dinner. You can also bring you entire family if you wish."

Carla laughed and said to just book at a restaurant for two and for him to choose the movie. He wrote down the address where she said to meet her.

"That address is in the center of downtown?"

"Yes dummy. It's a multiplex movie house. I'll meet you just inside the entrance. I don't wish to be walking down Constitution Street with you mauling my breasts."

He laughed, hoping that was a joke.

On Friday at office drinks from 5:00 to 7:00, Tim was walking to the men's room when the receptionist Tiffany came out of the ladies toilets. She grabbed him and pulled him into the ladies room and pushed him into a booth and slammed the door.

Within seconds Tim realized what this was about and when Tiffany offered sex, he took it. 

Tiffany was already kneeling on the seat of the bowl and her open pussy looked pretty big but Tim, rolling on a condom, thought he could manage, and did.

Combing her hair before they left the booth Tiffany said, "That was delightful Tim. Most guys feel rather loose inside me."

"Yeah great fuck Tiff. Keep your mouth shut about this eh?"

"Yes of course."

They emerged and found the office manager glaring at them.

"Off you go Tiff. I'll deal with this."

In the booth, Mrs Pennington sat on Tim's legs and he pinched and pulled her tiny tits and she screamed into an orgasm. The bitch kept him busy for another twenty minutes. She waved him off, saying she needed time to recover.

He slipped away before any more of the firm's over-sexed females got at him.

Tim shared an apartment with two gay female flight attendants and a guy who was doing a doctorate in public health. He'd told Tim his girlfriend didn't like sex but really enjoyed discussing public health policy.

Uh-huh.

Duncan was out and judging by the mess at least one of the airline girls was in.

Missy called, "Hi is that you Duncan?"

"No it's Tim."

"Meg is doing an extra shift. Do you want to play?"

"No thanks."

Gee what was she on about. She was gay.

He'd just flopped on to his bed when Missy came in wearing only a half-bra corset and white stockings.

Oh boy, when sex of this quality was on offer, he must take it, Tim thought. Her tits were up above the corset like too small over-inflated balls and her bald pussy was glistening. 

Uh-huh.

Missy purred she was sick of only being penetrated by artificial cocks and she hungered for the real thing.

Tim was into her in a flash and soon had her screaming like a knife-stuck pig. They demonstrated their versatility, although not having an audience, going at it hard in eleven different positions.

Next morning Tim regretted going at it almost out of control. He walked around like a zombie, almost asleep on his feet and his dick appeared shrunk as small as the supersized clit of some females. He only had sufficient energy to lift one foot after another and to open the fridge and drink half a pint of milk before he collapsed on to a sofa damp with the fluids of excessive sex. He felt tired, depraved and in deep need of sleep.

An hour later after napping, he dragged himself off to his bedroom.

Meg banged her way into his bedroom early afternoon seething mad.

"You asshole, you've been at my lover. Missy is almost comatose and awash in semen."

He dodged the blows and yelled it wasn't him.

"Ask Duncan if there was anyone else here?" he groaned.

Meg went off screaming, "Duncan you asshole, and beat him with her overnight bag judging by the din.

"I didn't fuck Missy, you know I don't fuck women or for that matter men," he blubbered.

"Then you masturbated over her, you asshole," she screamed.

Duncan must have smacked her because Tim heard the thump of someone hitting the ground.

"Oh Duncan," she whimpered. "I deserved that. I've been out of control with jealously. Make love to me Duncan my darling. I've always admired your skinny frame and I really don't notice your spectacles and skin blemishes."

Tim felt guilty he hadn't confessed. But then he heard the sound of bed-springs creaking in the familiar pattern of one-two, one-two, one-two and then heard Meg groan, "Oh Duncan."

Jesus, the shit would hit the fan sooner or later. 

* * *

The outing with Carla was a disaster. 

He felt wan and was almost shuffling and she said, "Omigod what happened to you."

"I had some Asian food last night that disagreed with me, violently," he lied. "Twice I didn't make it to the toilet on time."

"Oh I'm so sorry," she said sympathetically and hugged him.

"I-I don't think I can m-manage sex," he said.

"I can see that. Just finger me off during the movie and that will do."

"I-I best call the restaurant and cancel. Being Saturday they will have casuals wanting a table."

"Yes," she said, adding she could make do with a burger.

The movie was awful, mostly about females kissing and saying men were assholes. The females around them appeared delighted with it.

Tim concentrated on getting her off. As soon as the lights went out he'd worked a hand down over her stockings and back up under her short skirt.

Carla wasn't wearing panties and so that was handy.

He got her off five times and she came out of the cinema weaving and yawning and looking almost as bad as he felt.

"Put me in a cab and I'll eat later," she yawned. "I'm sorry I feel so tired for some reason. You must be disappointed in me."

"No I need to empty my bowels," he said, and for a moment thought she was about to vomit. But what else could he have said?

The sorry couple parted with Carla yawning and saying they must get together soon; she was so much looking forward to having sex with him and added, "But we'll need to be in better condition than this."

"That's true," Tim said, giving her a weak kiss goodbye.

Tim arrived at the apartment and Meg knocked him flat to the floor, hitting his head with the heavy skillet.

"You bastard, you bastard," she screamed. "Missy confessed you fucked her ten times."

"I can't dispute that," he groaned. "I failed to keep count."

That earned him two hard kicks to the ribs by the bad-tempered bitch who was wearing shoes.

Missy and Duncan came running, awoken by the commotion.

"Don't hurt him," Missy whined and Duncan said, "Don't kill him."

"Right we need to discuss this whole mess," Meg said, taking charge and helping Tim to his feet.

Missy pulled four beers out of the fridge and the conference was underway.

It ended in agreement. Missy would go to Tim's bedroom at 6:00 each morning whenever she wished to be fucked and Meg would jump into Duncan's bed each morning when she wanted it. Meg and Missy would continue sleeping together and would have their sex each evening. Everyone was to respect each other's sexuality.

Tim, the attorney, thought the agreement was a load of rubbish, obviously promoted by an emotional female incapable of seeing the big picture, and it would be unenforceable. But it was worth playing along with it because it meant at the moment at least he didn't have to find new accommodation and the only one he was permitted to fuck was Misty. Actually the agreement wasn't too bad.

CHAPTER 2

Tim's mom called him to complain her was ignoring his family. He agreed with his mom and said he'd visit them at the weekend, arriving on a flight on Saturday morning with his new girlfriend.

"God you have managed to find a woman who will go out with you more than once?" said his mom, obviously in an uncharitable mood.

Tim ignored the put-down.

He called Carla.

"Hi. I didn't know you worked in finance."

"There is a lot you don't know about me. I'm assistant internal auditor with this enterprise."

"Mom wants to meet you."

Carla appeared to reply carefully and asked why.

"I'm not sure. Perhaps I may have said something about you were the greatest female I've ever met."

"Meaning?"

Quick thinking was required and Tim snatched at it. "You warned me not to advance otherwise you'd see to it I was jailed."

"Oh you remember that? I thought guys would have memory of that buried within a few hours of the offence."

"I'm not your ordinary guy."

She laughed and said that appeared obvious and for some reason she was thinking of the term borderline dysfunctional.

He told Carla his mom had called saying he was ignoring his family and he said he would visit this weekend. "I then ran out of conversation and said I had a girlfriend and she said that was nice and invited me to bring her. Without thinking I said yes... um before consulting you."

"Am I your girlfriend?"

"Well the invitation is there."

"You know Tim, I would have bet you were the kind of guy who'd want to have sex with a woman before you decided about entering more than a one night stand with her. I'm surprised to have been so wrong about you."

"Well yes none of us it perfect," Tim smiled, wondering how could she be so wrong about him when initially she'd been spot on? Women should trust their instincts although he'd certainly not tell Carla that.

Carla said, "Yes I'll accompany you and thanks for the invitation."

He said excitedly and relieved that he'd call for her at 6:15 for a 7:00 am flight that would take just under three hours. 

Carla said she'd collect him because she had to come into the city to get to the airport.

Tim, dressed in a university sweat shirt and old jeans, stood outside the apartment building looking out for a white Ford Explorer. He saw the lights flash.

He boggled when he saw Carla was in full make-up with her blonde hair in a ponytail and she was wearing top-shelf shades and high-fashion shoes to go with a dress that looked as if it were made out of kitchen foil.

""Um may I kiss you?"

"You are allegedly my boyfriend aren't you?"

He took that to mean yes and kissed her.

"You look great," he said, telling the truth and felt a little ruffled when she said she couldn't say the same for him."

"Please do up your fly and here you may borrow my comb."

Tim was horrified that he'd made an enormous mistake in asking Carla to be his girlfriend. Jesus she was acting as if she were his mother.

"Um why are you dolled up as if going to a royal wedding?"

"Your mother will be expecting me to make a good impression. You know what mothers are like."

Well he had news for her. His mom wouldn't care what Carla wore or what she did provided she kept her feet off the table, didn't pass wind at dinner, wore a clean shirt and didn't mess up the bathroom... oh and yes, didn't give his mom a hard time.

The flight was okay although Carla refused to be mauled, saying she didn't want her dress creased. She chatted away and before long he reached the opinion she was intelligent, lively, friendly and talkative without giving the impression she was a fucking know-all.

Good stuff. He liked his new girlfriend.

She asked incisively, "Why did you study law?"

"Dad wanted me to do a health administration degree and mom wanted me to become a physician."

"I don't see any connection and wouldn't you have been more of a public liability as a doctor than as an attorney?"

"Answering the first part of your question Carla, dad is CEO at one of our city's hospitals and mom is a doctor's nurse. My buddy Tubby Chong decided on law and said healthcare administration was all about fighting for funding and being sued while medicine involved too much training and being expected to be on call 24/7. So I went through college and law school with Tubby who now works in Hong Kong. I graduated and my Uncle Royce got me a position where I work now."

"Ah I see the connection."

Tim's 25-year old married sister Lorraine met them at the airport.

She gawked when introduced to Carla and said, "How on earth did you come to meet my brother?"

"Through a mutual friend," Carla lied. "I found him smart, engaging and fun to be with and to be so sensitive."

Lorraine went into a laughing fit and apologized but gave no explanation.

"Where are the folk?"

"Dad had an emergency at the hospital and mom had an early appointment at the hair salon."

"Ah are they going out tonight?"

"No you fool. She wishes to make a good impression on Carla. Mom thought since Carla is your first girlfriend since college, she must have special qualities."

"Why hasn't Tim had girlfriends before this?"

Lorraine shrugged. "He's preferred banging sluts."

The women clasped each other, shrieking in laughter and had to yell to Tim to hold up because he'd surged away muttering angrily. 

He didn't stop and so the two women slowed, walking arm-in-arm and waited at the exit for Tim to emerge with the checked-through bags.

When they reached the car, Lorraine called, "Take the front seat Carla. I don't trust Tim with my car because he's such a lousy driver."

Lorraine unlocked the trunk and said, "How on earth did you manage to land her, and be truthful." 

"I fucked her and she couldn't get enough of me."

Lorraine nodded and said that was so unlikely it probably was true.

They entered the imposing house fronting a lawn that ran to the edge of a big lake.

"Mom said to give you the choice of the guest room or sleeping with Asshole, er I mean my brother. She said to say she doesn't mind what you choose."

Tim waited, holding his breath and wondering if this was another humiliation for him.

"I'll sleep with your brother. I can't get enough of him."

Tim tried not to smirk when his sister glanced at him.

"Then you'll both be in the guestroom at the other end of the house so you don't keep mom and dad awake."

"Oh does the head-board bang?"

The females were at it again, laughing with mouths wide open.


Dating in These Times



"Mom's invited several of Tim's friends for lunch. Carla would you like to help me prepare lunch once you have settled?"

"Yes of course. You can tell me all about your brother. He doesn't say much about himself."

In the guestroom than looked out to the lake, Tim said, "I'll sleep on the floor if you wish."

"No silly, I came hoping to get properly fucked, and by that I don't mean by your father."

He grinned at her humor and said that once Lorraine was through telling lies about him, Carla wouldn't want anything more to do with him.

"Silly boy," she said kissing him." I can see Lorraine is lively and is a big tease like many younger sisters are. I already have my opinion or you and it's promising and I can see great potential for improvement."

Tim felt as if he'd just won his first case in a civil action. 

* * *

"Omigod, what a wonderful kitchen," Carla enthused.

"Yes mom's third love after family and her profession is cooking. She's a brilliant chef."

"Oooh is must be handy to have a mother like that. My mother couldn't cook to save herself."

"Then you can't cook either?"

"There are people who praise my efforts. A succession of our cooks taught me since when I was about three."

"Omigod you have someone to come in and cook?"

"Actually she lives in."

"Omigod and so does the housekeeper and chauffeur?"

"We don't have a chauffeur because my parents both love driving."

"What does your father do?"

"Oh a bit of this and that. He's on the board of several companies and is chairman of three."

"Omigod, and your mother?"

"She works at one of our city hospitals."

"What as?"

Carla said did it matter and Lorraine said no and said they should start cutting the meats.

"Your brother, do you like him, I mean even a bit?"

"God yes. He's always looked after me and saved me twice from drowning in the lake, the second time I was almost unconscious after my sailboat capsized. I was caught under the sail. He was crewing in a passing yacht, dived in and pulled me clear. He taught me to row a boat and then a skiff and then to sail, to play tennis and set me up with my first boyfriends."

"So you also like putting him down by teasing him?"

"Yes because it cuts him down to size when he begins to think of himself as bulletproof and better than most people. He has a great academic record but has trouble handling some situations such as when he is criticized and he's not very good with women. I think his problem is he thinks women are really only good for one thing?"

"Raising a family?"

Lorraine almost cut her hand with the knife she was laughing so much.

Carla was in one of Lorraine's mother's aprons and had sliced and filled two earlier-prepared sponge cakes and was decorating the tops expertly with whipped cream with the cake decorating tool when a plumpish woman entered the kitchen, took one look at the skilled handiwork and cried, "Omigod."

"Oh hi mom," Lorraine said. "This is Carla Stone, a lovely woman and a remarkable find by your son. Oh and Carla has been cooking since the age of three."

"Hi Mrs Cooke. You have a talented hairdresser."

"Oh darling, how beautiful you are. Please call me Nola."

"Mom Carla has also made raspberry jello in our shooter glasses laced with vodka. They are in the fridge now setting and she says to use them as starters."

"Omigod, how novel. We must warn drivers to take care with what they drink."

Tim's father, a burly guy of 6 ft. 2 in., a couple of inches taller than his son, arrived and greeted Carla warmly and winning her heart when he said, "Oh my, just look at you. In all my years I've at last met the perfect looking woman. You are front cover magazine material."

The guests began arriving at 1:30, six females and eight guys, who'd gone through high school with Tim and had been invited without partners to make it a proper reunion.

Nola worked in the kitchen and Lorraine and Carla acted as waitresses. The meal was served under a canvass canopy on the side terrace.

It went very well. Lorraine went home and that night Simon took his family and Carla to a Turkish restaurant.

Later when Tim and Carla entered the guestroom that was a suite and Carla asked Tim, "Nervous."

"No I expect you won't look grotesque when you removed your clothes"

"Beast," she yelled and grabbing a pillow attempted to slug him with it but he wouldn't keep still long enough for her to hit him.

He finally grabbed the pillow to stop her futile flailing and grabbed and kissed her and squeezed a breast.

"Oh god, the moment has arrived at last," she whimpered. 

"Yeah I promise not to fall asleep."

She sighed and reaching back unzipped her dress and held up her arms.

Tim whipped off her dress and had her bra pulled up and was sucking a nipple before she had time to complete undoing her bra. But by the time she's tossed aside her bra he'd pulled down her panties and was licking into her pussy before she had kicked off her panties.

"Stop this is not fair."

He stopped and looked at her apprehensively.

"You undress so I can also play."

He grinned and undressed as fast as he could.

"Oh my, that's a piece of heavy equipment," she said, and meant it. "Do you think....?"

"No problem providing we get you really wet."

They were highly excited and both climaxed three times inside an hour before they faltered, alcohol, the excitement, and the physical activity all taking them to the point of exhaustion.

"You fuck very well," he yawned. "You really can be my girlfriend."

"Thanks," she murmured, falling asleep in his arms, sweaty and without having a pee and cleaning up.

"That truly was wonderful," he murmured, but there was no reply. 

* * *  

Carla awoke later and went to the bathroom. Back in bed she thought about her unlikely connection with Tim. She hated uncouth people and yet he was one, in fact almost a perfect example. Yet she couldn't keep her hands, er her focus, off him.

All in all it was very puzzling. Here she was in bed with a guy that on their first encounter she'd been ready to set the cops on him.

Very strange and this was not like her at all.

It had happened because she was wounded after a guy she thought was preparing to propose marriage began to fade and finally admitted there was someone else. It was the classic scene and she received the news as a 'Dear Carla' email that began he was so sad to advise but...blah, blah.'

Tim had caught her on the rebound and after one date she had intended moving on because he was such a hick. But their first date was a disaster although for the first time in her life she'd stooped to be fingered off in a cinema, or any public place for that matter. Her behavior in that instance had not really surprised her because she had the desire to be in sexual contact with someone again to bury the humiliation. So she'd held Tim's hand in place and he'd gotten her off three or four times. 

She'd gone home that night determined to allow him to screw her because no other guy had appeared on her doorstep, tongue hanging out.

Then her behavior continued to puzzle her. Tim invited her to go away with him, to his home. She'd thought bad idea but had said yes.

What was this?

And now that she'd had sex with him at last was she wishing to run off?

No.

Jeepers. Well she wasn't to blame, well not completely. His sister Lorraine had been a strong influence. Lorraine loved her brother... the teasing was only a front. And Lorraine, speaking factually, had revealed a different Tim to Carla, a guy who'd been deeply involved in family and certainly appeared to be highly respected by his family and his friends and his achievements mentioned had been notable. And yes, she had mentioned Tim had some difficulty relating to women.

Carla thought back at their first encounter, 'Miss I want to look at your tits.' Yes Tim did have a problem with women. Probably he grew up used to asking Lorraine to show him her tits and she obliged. And what else was she asked to do? Carla thought that was none of her business and fell asleep.

A hand hit her thigh just after dawn. Carla was awake waiting for some sort of move from him. She threw off the covers and went down on him like a dog after a bone.

Nola kissed them when they arrived for breakfast and Carla noted the extra-long hug Tim received.

Simon just waved but appeared pleased to see them both. God he appeared to have received more than enough sex from his wife.

She smiled at Nola and said they were in for a lovely day.

"Yes. Would we were thinking of taking you for a sail on the lake but perhaps there are other things you'd like to do?"

Carla said that would be lovely and Nola said they would call into a shore-side café for lunch.

"That sounds very romantic."

"Yes and so it is," Nola said as if surprised Carla would say such a thing.

"Only row or paddle boats or sail boats of a restricted size are permitted on the lake," Simon said."

"What restricted to J24's?"

"Yes exactly. What made you say that?"

"Nothing really except I've seen them on the lake. I learned to sail on a J24 as a young girl."

Nola asked what Carla's father did.

"My parents are older than you guys. Dad is semi-retired and manages investments for people and is on the board of some companies. He sold the accountancy business he founded."

"And your mother?"

"She works at a hospital."

Nola said really. She asked what did Carla's mother do and Carla said she was a surgeon. "It's a hospital that specializes in prolonging the lives of the aged. Mom heads the big surgical team."

"Omigod," said Nola.

"My brother Charles and sister Jenna and I rarely go home these days," Carla said softly. "My parents spend most of their time fighting and both have been having affairs for years."

There was a brief silence until Tim grabbed another bagel filled with egg and bacon and said, "I'll go down and prepare Sweetheart dad."

"Thanks pal."

When Tim left after smiling at Carla, she asked, "You call your boat Sweetheart."

"Yes," Nola laughed. "Simon gave her to me for my 40th birthday. I get my best relaxation sailing."

"How absolutely romantic," Carla enthused. "I better have another bagel to boost my energy level."

"I'll provide you with a cap, waterproof jacket and life preserver," Nola said. "Something tells me today won't be an idle cruise."

At 'Sailor's Heaven', Nola took a call and just managed to hear.

"It's Lorraine inviting us to dinner tonight."

Carla nodded to Tim and he held up a thumb.

Back on board 'Sweetheart' Nola handed the tiller to Carla.

"It's time to perform darling. Three J-24 skippers have challenged us to a race to the dam first marker warning at the bottom of the lake and others will probably join in."

"Okay."

"Good I wasn't looking forward to insisting. I'm so happy you'll meet my grandson this evening."

"Lorraine's baby?"

"Yes, she and Jimmy have been married three years and Jessie was weaned last month."

"Oh the little darling; I'd love to see her."

On their return flight home, Carla still wouldn't allow Tim to grope. He wondered if she'd basically found sex boring.

When she dropped him off at his home she called, "So I really am your girlfriend?"

He turned and grinned, "Yeah because you know how to screw well."

"Oh god," she groaned, driving off.

During the next two days at the office, Tim looked closely at other women, most of whom he felt sure would allow him to screw them, if only once. He concluded none of them measured up to Carla in looks, vivaciousness, stature and easy-going personality. Wow, he'd stumbled on the perfect date who only recently had threatened him with jail. He called her.

"Oh hi, I had thought you'd forgotten me."

"What after that volcanic blast of screwing in my parents' guestroom?"

She sounded surprised and asked, "Are you sure you were with me?"

"Oh baby, you even have humor," he gloated.

"Well for a male you are relatively observant."

He roared with laughter and she appeared to find that mildly amusing and said when would he like to date again and he said that evening.'

"I look after my body and tend to have sex no more than twice a week."

"Okay then what two days a week should we date?"

She snapped and asked was that the only thing about her he was interested in and he countered by asking what thing was that, guessing correctly she'd be too ladylike to be specific.

"I could call around and wash the Explorer."

"Oh god, would you? Um I might be able to find some way to reward you. I don't mean money, I mean sexually."

"What's the soonest time I can call?"

She giggled and gave Tim the time and address.

However, ten minutes later Tim realized that date would set up a precedence of being served sex as a reward for work. That was not a good start to a romantic relationship, or rather entanglement as Carla appeared bent on establishing. He preferred the long-accepted romance model: movie-dinner-a fuck. It had worked splendidly for generations and Carla had to learn it would work for them.

He called her and cancelled that night's date, saying he'd been thrown extra work to do. She sounded disappointed and that really pleased him, thinking she might actually have a heart.

Over the next few weeks Carla and Tim were banging away twice a week and occasionally he cracked a bonus one from her by being sweet and persistent.

And then Tim began meeting some of her girlfriends and some of them began calling him and clearly wanting to be dated and fucked. He wrote down the names and phone numbers and surprised them by asking how many times a week did they like sex. All were libertines compared with Carla, saying their preference was to have it each time sex was offered.

Even her sister Jenna who called into Carla's shared apartment when he was there looked at him with that special look women get when they desire to be shafted. He licked his top lip briefly and Jenna smiled, triumphantly he thought. She was thirty six and the married sister with two small children had a bust that was also thirty-six. 

Gallantly Tim decided to ask Carla which of her friends he should have sex with and what about her sister, but each time he went to ask he baulked, not accepting she could handle such a proposition.

But Carla, being a very modern miss, accidentally revealed her promiscuous side. During a party to which Tim had accompanied her, Tim walked into the unlocked bathroom and found her bent over the bath and being screwed by the host.

"Oh hi darling," she puffed.

He growled, "Are you wearing a condom Steve?"

"Sure thing buddy. Your Carla is a really tight fit."

"Join us darling."

Tim fled to grab another drink.

Jesus.

He stood alone scowling and the hostess came up to him and asked had he seen her partner Steve.

"No," he lied, staring at her cute rack.

She pulled out her dress at the neckline and said, "Take a look and tell me what you think."

"Nicely fleshy, very cute."

"Oh darling," she said, grabbing his hand and leading him to the master bedroom. She locked the door and said, "Please fuck me... um...?"

"Tim," he said, thinking no way.

But he did.

She went to a bedside drawer and pulled out a condom pack and handed it to him and then stood tip-toe and licked down the side of his tanned face and understandably his dick took over his brain.

"My name is Paula, remember?" she said, having been introduced when he and Carla had arrived. She deftly removed her panties and dragged them under his nose and ordered, "Sniff."

As a result of that Tim was seduced.

She pushed him on to the bed and removed his pants while he shed his shirt.

"Omigod," she lied, holding his dick as if it were a fence post. How can I possibly take this?"

He groped by his right side and found the condom and rolled it on, having visions of her screaming as his dick practically tore her apart.

He panted.

She grinned at him evilly and plopped down on his dick and it slipped up her as if her cunt was lined with oiled silk.

She then rode him as if winning the Kentucky Derby.

She came bawling and he erupted hugely and watched her topple off, sweating profusely. Tim caught Paula's hand to stop her spilling off the bed.

He gaped when spotting how much she was dripping.

"God it's a couple of years since I've been awash like this. Are you sure you didn't blow out the end of the rubber.

He pulled it off and Paula peered at the pouch and said, no it was fine and that really was an impressive load. "Toss it on the bathroom floor and I deal with it later. I need a rest."

Tim showered and patted his dick affectionately.

It didn't surprise him when taking Carla home that she wasn't interested in having sex. But she spoke to him frankly.

"Um about you catching me with Steve. I'm a bit promiscuous because I'll be married in a couple of years or so and then intend being a good girl."

"Did you take it up the butt from Steve?"

"Um yes but you must understand darling I respect you too much to grant you access. Steve is such a fucking animal."

Tim sighed and knew he'd have to accept that. It was how hot-dating young women were these days. They tended to date guys who could be husband material while they consorted with guys who were 'fucking animals' to really get them off. Hadn't Paula just taught him that, mistaking him for an animal type but surprisingly so because she'd done most of the work?

"I want your butt Carla."

"Okay but not tonight."

Carla's sister with the 36-pack called him next day.

"Hi Tim."

"Hi Jenna."

"You remembered my voice and my name?"

"Yes and those are not the only distinctive things about you."

"Oh you mean my tits?"

He laughed and said not that he'd noticed and she just laughed.

"I was wondering about changing attorneys and talking to you about it?"

"Jenna I'll fuck you without bother with false preambles."

"My husband is taking our kids to his parent's late Friday afternoon and they won't return home until around lunchtime next day."

"Well let's not foul your nest. Doll up a bit and come to our office drinks on Friday night and pose as a prospective new client. New and prospectives attend that social occasion. Then we can go out to dinner and fuck the night away at my apartment that I share. The two female flight attendants are away this weekend and I'll get the gay guy to stay overnight with his boyfriend."

"Oh that would be wonderful. I love meeting new people and you'll understand I rarely get off the leash."

When Tim saw Jenna in a tight blue dress being escorted into the boardroom by one of the receptionists he almost ejaculated inside his pants. She really wasn't all that plump; she was magnificently curvaceous. He hurried over and heard conversations stop as people stared at the new arrivals. He held out his hand and Jenna smiled at him knowingly. She chose a champagne cocktail and he switched from beer to red wine and he introduced Jenna to some of the attorneys and their wives who knew Carla, but none realized that Jenna was Carla's sister because she was introduced by her married name of King.

The left the function early, and being in an elevator alone, Tim pushed into Jenna as they had their first kiss and he held a hand against her groin and she pushed her vulva hard against his palm.

"You'll make me wet."

"Good," he grunted as they kissed again and this time their tongues slid against each other.

Out on the sidewalk, Tim suggested going to a French restaurant but she said, "I'd prefer something light. I don't enjoy fucking after a heavy dinner."

Gee where did she stuff the food?

"Oh pizza?"

"Perfect," she smiled.

An hour later, Tim almost ejaculated again when in the apartment Jenna eased out of her tight dress and removed her bra. Her freed tits slid down her chest. Oh my, heavy hangers. He was a real fan of heavy hangers when their owner didn't mind them being bullied a bit.




Dating in These Times



They settled on the sofa and the foreplay went on for so long he was thinking it had turned into five-play.

Then as Jenna shuddered and had a mini-gush over his three tiring fingers she said, "Would you mind if we just did it anally? No guy other than my husband had had my pussy since I married and I'd like to keep it that way."

"No problem."

"I have lube and some tickler-type condoms I'd like to try and, um, I..."

"Also brought a vibrator?"

"No just a small dildo to plug my pussy in case you slow down doing anal."

"Jenna, you are wonderful. You think of everything."

She giggled and said, "I'll lie on my back so you have easy access to my floppies."

They went at it nicely and slowly and conversed.

"Have you committed adultery before?"

She said a few times, usually with relatives.

"Men or women," he joked.

"Both sexes but not at the same time of course. I'm not a slut."

They did it again in the morning and that was the end of them, sexually. She kissed him goodbye and went off in a cab to the supermarket, looking very happy.

"Nice woman," Tim thought, hoping he'd done nothing to unsettle her marriage.

Next night when bent over Carla, they doing it anally, Tim thought well he preferred Carla's smaller boobs and tighter asshole, but only marginally. Carla had the better personality and more engaging conversation but then he did know her better and at the end of the day it didn't matter. What mattered was how people actually felt about one another. God was he maturing?

"I'm sick of flitting from place to place to have sex," Carla said as they showered and he was soaping her back. "Have you thought about us moving in together?"

"Yes."

"Oooh, tell me."

"Well I would like it to happen and we should share all living expenses down the middle."

"That sounds fine. We'd need to find garage parking for two vehicles."

"Yeah."

"Anything else?"

"That we enter a pact never to have sex with anyone but each other in our home."

"Gee you have been thinking deeply. Actually I agree with all that and only wish to add that you share in the housework and really help to keep the place clean and tidy."

"Yeah no problem. Just look at my room here."

"Indeed. So when?"

"Come to my office at 6:00 and we'll begin a web search and then go out to dinner." 

"Great idea. Oh I suppose you'll want sex?"

He was leaving the shower and turned and grinned.

"Omigod, you know I know a couple of lesbians who live together and claim they only get into it once a week."

"Liars?"

"I think so; they are only my age. I seem to want to do it more now that I'm hooked up with you."

They began looking at downtown apartments but all reasonably-priced apartments they liked offered garaging for only one vehicle although many had outdoor spaces for renting.

They finally signed for a two-bedroom and recently meticulously renovated old house only a 1½ miles from the city center with a roomy garage that included stands for two bikes.                       

Carla called next day and said she was so happy about their newly acquired abode. 

Tim said, "Mrs Bateman said we can move in this Friday if we wish. I've just returned from signing up at the letting agency, with the rental period taking effect from Friday. The lawn and garden care guy is due on Thursday and he'll also remove that pile of junk in the garage at Mrs Bateman's expense."

"Good boy. Mom is surprised that I've found someone I wish to live with and invited you to come to lunch this Saturday."

"I was thinking of doing a cookout for you Saturday in our new garden."

"Well don't meet my parents then. It's rare for mom to invite anyone home."

"On the other hand a cookout Sunday sounds perfect. I'm been thinking about fucking you on that recently mown lawn with me trapping the wafting scent of flowers between us each time I thrust into you."

"Omigod, I've landed a guy with a floral fetish."

They laughed and she gave him details about Saturday's lunch.

Time to meet the parents, Tim thought as he drove off with Carla in his white Buick LaCrosse V6.

"You'll be glad you no longer have to pay that exorbitant rent to garage this vehicle downtown."

"Yeah it's one of the pluses but a minus is we can no longer walk to a range of quality restaurants."

Mrs Stone met them at the door and kissed Carla and waited for this introduction.

"This is Tim."

"Hi Tim, please call me Rene. I invited you here to get a good look at you. Carla's sister and brother are also here as well as my bad-tempered husband Peter."

Actually it turned out big-tit Rene was the bad-tempered one that day while thin and seemingly mild Peter played the perfect host.

Carla's sister Jenna pretended she and Tim had never met and Peter, the brother born between the two girls was thirty-two, an office manager, and appeared very pleasant. All in all, the family seemed very okay.

As Tim and Carla drove home she asked, "What did you think of my family?"

"The seemed cool although your mom appeared brittle."

"Is that a criticism?"

"No just a passive observation."

"Oh. Why did you keep avoiding eye contact with Jenna?"

"I tried to avoid looking at her in case you thought I was ogling her tits and that might upset you."

"Oh, good boy."

That night they had sex, the third night in a row. God they were already living like a married couple, Tim thought.

Carla yawned when she returned from the bathroom. "When my mom hits on you for sex will you give it to her?"

"Hell no, I'd rather shaft your sister."

"Okay... I wouldn't like the thought of your fucking my mother. I think her problem is she has far too much sex for her level of fitness. Near-exhaustion keeps her grumpy."

Tim thought of all the dates he'd had, Carla provided the most interesting conversations.

"Have you and your mom done it?" he asked and the reply was infrequently.

What the hell did that mean?

"But rarely dad and I."

At that, Tim had the impression he was bedding a sex monster.

"I'm confident I could get Jenna to join us in a threesome," she said.

He refrained from replying.

"I could lube you and she could fist you. She's very good."

"Good night Carla," he yawned.

"Good night sweetie. Oh I forgot to mention my friend Alyson would like you to date her. You really should call her. I've done it with all of my girlfriends with a strap-on and Alyson is truly a wonderful lover."

Tim groaned and imagined all of Carla's girlfriends lined up all with strap-ons and big gleams in their eyes and Carla lubing his butt. He shuddered and ejaculated over her leg as she slid in beside him.

She simpered, "Oooh darling, you are trigger happy tonight."

THE END