0 comments/ 4444 views/ 1 favorites All about Life and Passion By: lifeandpassion Chapter I Wet Rose Prelude Darkness started melting through autumn raindrops sensitively scratching windows pestered with coldness. The city of Gratewill woke up on the chest of wet evening, smelling like memories of childish craziness. It was raining gently, feeling like the nature was getting ready to burst in tears and overflow all day distress over a sleepy city. The coming night could mean a lot for people but Darius Gates was feeling nothing but warm waves, softly blown by the fireplace and whiskey cleaning his throat, time to time checking his watch as he was waiting for a late patient. The last drop from a squared glass touched his lip when knock on the door made him abandon the chair. The only thing his profession and psychologist's mission were promising was a next boring conversation with a new patient, but when he opened the door the beauty standing behind it suspended all around, except for his feelings and passions. Describing her beauty, cuteness and disguised wildness would be harder than making a politician tell the truth but all he needed to do was to let her in. Even standing on small, cute leather high heels, in white stockings, purple summer dress, short white coat and chamomile in her hair, she still looked like a little angel, barely over eighteen. Pearl necklace around her neck and her breast, rising up and down as she was breathing, were making her disguised passion even more noticeable. And finally, in her blue eyes the only reflection he could see was the dream about her cute, soft, red, warm lips. "I'm sorry, is this Dr. Darius' office? I'm Delilah Swift. My dad's secretary, Mrs. Pitcher, has scheduled the appointment." She asked, moving her head to the right and to the left, like she wanted to see the room environment over his shoulders. "Yes, of course. Please, come in." He answered seriously, trying to keep the first conversation on the level of professional approach. He moved from the threshold and let her enter his cave as he loved to joke about it. She was very young but her womanly refined manners and walking style made him pay attention to her cute, nicely formed legs disappearing into the dress like the pincers of passion, ending with round shapes that could be yet easily noticed even under the coat. She crossed the room with slow but self-confident steps, left her coat on the hanger and lay down on the recliner chair. It seemed she knew perfectly what she was doing and it was not her first time of psychological therapy. He took his seat in the armchair beside her and didn't say anything for a while, just researching her reactions and thoughts. She was surprised of comparing the Dr. Darius' office to those typical offices she had visited before. The smell of old books was creating great mixture of scents together with the air saturated with evaporated whiskey. He was sipping his drink and the smell of it was easily incising into her mind, helping her to relax. Somehow, he was not amazed to catch her stolen looks, probably because he knew that his astonishing appearance had been intimacy snare for many women. Her attempts to take her eyes away from him were failing every time she wanted not to notice how special he was. Just like his room he was unordinary, different from other doctors, people, everything and everyone she had met before. For a man in his thirties he looked very young, probably because of his calm face, well-build body that could remind of brazen statue created to hold women's souls and never let them go. Little, shiny reflection of fireplace in his dark black eyes and his deep voice were creating the personality she could fall for. They met just five minutes ago but gravity between them was growing into tension she could not explain. "I guess it shouldn't be your first visit to psychologist..." He started gently gaining her trust. "Right..." She said as if she could not feel any sorrow or anything at all. She was calm and senseless but realizing he was not going to reply back - she kept talking: "Maybe there is nothing you or anyone can help me with... maybe I'm just crazy... or the most normal person in the world... I'm not sure, but we all have our own cross to carry up to Golgotha, pains that don't let us sleep, don't let us dream... and yet, nothing is worse than the feeling of feeling emptiness, neither happiness - nor sadness..." She took a breath and looked at him, as if she was starving for his reply and help. He kept silent, watching her with narrowed eyelids, whimsically, sipping on his drink again. It was her first time meeting an unordinary psychologist, acting like he did not even care about what she was saying. He was not questioning her or giving the tests which could never tell anything really helpful. She could feel that he was constantly checking on her with hungry eyes but that did not make her feel uncomfortable. On the contrary, believing that he wasn't even paying attention to her words, she decided to open up finally and share the scars of her heart: "Every day, all I think about is if there is a boat capable to get me on another side of the river. I'm confused and I'm tired of everything, tired of every single pain I don't want to remember about. Falling in love and then falling from the sky, death of my mom who had been my best friend, everyday stresses and routines, and then again I feel tired to fix my feelings, I feel tired of struggling, I'm drained from emotional energy and even when I look all healthy and strong, deep inside all I feel is tired emptiness of spliced feelings, senses and instincts... I've been trying to grow strong and fight all that and I guess I won but now all I feel is nothing... and the only fear left in my heart is to die without feeling a sunrise one more time... be already dead for the time when the death will come on a visit." Darius noticed her trembling lips. She sounded calm, but she was lying about becoming insensible. He was calling her condition Assuaged Depression, similar to a person who gets beat up so hard that it does not hurt anymore. She was trying to go through over eighteen problems when life becomes so serious that a person stands on the borderline of the heaven and the hell. Life on the edge gets especially dangerous after the first heartbreak, unreciprocated love that leaves two major trances on a human soul: one is the love that is meant to turn people into more humanly creatures and the second -- emotional pain that can destroy creatures from within, dismiss her just like rapid variability of fire and ice destructs everything. Such internal rack of emotional struggles can easily hurt flesh and soul and drive a person to desperation. He was aware of her emotional condition and knew perfectly that it is not always expressed in hysteric or emotional blast that's why he decided to give her a little help instantly. He wanted to touch her and take her pain away, but suddenly he got scared: what if there was something inside of her heart that would finally make him the slave to her passion. He did not know where this fear came from, but somewhere deep inside he was glad to have the first experience of fear... "What is that bracelet you have?" Darius asked her while getting up from his chair and stretching out his hand to her. She became confused with such an unordinary situation change and recklessly gave him her hand with a light blue bracelet on it. "Hm, sapphire" He smiled and kept entertaining her while she was thinking that such a strange behavior was just a product of the alcohol that he already smelled like: "Do you know what people say about it?" He asked to hold her full attention. "About, about what? I'm sorry, I'm lost." His behavior was weird, but so confident and manly in manners that she was starting to feel who the master was. He started caressing her arm, running his fingers up and down. She could feel all that in her heart but could not explain what it was. She could not even notice how his hand started softly glowing in gold and silver colors as his look was gazed into her eyes and compelling her to absorb all he was saying: "It is believed that sapphire surrounds people with hope, faith, joy, and brings peace with intuitive understanding. Sapphire stones are thought to be able to maintain the power needed in order that our deepest desires and dreams will be fulfilled one day." Sapphire gemstones symbolize truth and honesty. They increase the ability to communicate, release depressive moods and bring calmness, mental clarity, clear vision and peace. Even though, in this case Dr. Darius was just using his gift to compel her to forget the heavy pain she was in and relax. It was working for her but that coasted him to go through all her pains from very childhood to present to clean everything up. All her memories would stay with her just with no pain for a while. For the reason he could not explain he was ready to carry her pain on his shoulders. Besides tensed gravity between them there was something else that was attaching him to her and after cleaning her emotions he understood it. There was really huge emptiness in her heart, like a black hole that sucks in every joy a person can get from life besides wild instincts that last maximum for couple of minutes. His gift to compel people was not a surprise to him but feeling how her emptiness was joining to his one and how two feelings of emptiness where filling each other felt like magic to him. It could be only compared to the original miracle of creating the universe -- two emptiness combining and creating a totally new world for two joined souls. Soul is just a biological energy, according to many people's beliefs but now he was feeling the gravity towards her that had the power to join them over the universe. How could it be possible that he knew so many things but he couldn't figure out how he lost himself so easily, what was that power that was keeping exploding within him. They both had been in love before, thinking there was nothing stronger than those feelings, but now he knew he was terribly wrong. "What was that you just did to me?" She asked, gazing at her face to read sudden expressions. "Nothing, I haven't done anything particular... just an admirer of gym stones..." He replied in order to cover up his astonishment. So far, he had not met earthling which could overcome the force of his persuasion before. For whatever reason, her spiritual pains were fomenting rapidly again. "Your touch calmed me as if I was with a kind witch on my side." She sighed and smiled to make sure he would not think she was out of her mind. "Calmed? I hesitate to say you've been worried before." He smiled and kept talking: "Anyways, you know the saying: we should not worry about two things: one -- whatever can't be fixed and the second -- whatever can be fixed. If you have anything else to worry about, go ahead!" His answer was rough but funny at the same time. That's why she didn't pay too much attention at his words. All she wanted to know was what he did. How his touch could be so heavenly and addictive. She wanted to feel it again. "Can you do it again?" She got up from the recliner chair and caught his hand. At first he thought it was interesting and funny how the girl overcame his power but his another side started acting out. He was feeling like a stubborn baby, not able to control his anger because she didn't obey to his power. Now he knew touching her just with his magic fingers wasn't enough. He needed to get under her skin, invade all her body, and get inside of her to fully conquest every single molecule of her existence. He had to get her subconscious into trance. "Are you sure you want me to repeat that? Are you sure you can face the reality of the mystic universe? Are you sure you aren't afraid of the power you just felt?" He was gazing into her eyes again like a maniac, beast, thirsty for her integrity and he answered: "I would not be so mercilessly sure..." He was holding her arms so tight that she could barely breathe and decided to deliver her last breath to his neck. "And I wouldn't be so questionable..." She whispered on his lips, craving the desire to obey his instincts. He had about ten minutes to keep her compelled. The only way to conquer her body was to fully conquer her subconscious. She had to give herself to a substantial trance. Her kiss was that life-giving power potent to resound childhood melody in an old man's heart. He was acknowledging the nature of phoenix: burning to ashes and returning back to life after unleashing his wild nature. He would enjoy every single second of stripping her down and sensing torridity of every millimeter on her bared body but the time was not waiting. Standing motionless like a lava statue in front of her mingled face he torn her closes off, then his own, and adjoined her shivering breast to his throbbing chest, wrapping her left leg around his hip, stimulating her neck with his second hand - running his strong and hard fingers into and out her hair. She didn't know how it happened so fast and what power made her to get lost in passion which was running through her veins like waterfall ebullient from top of mountains. Having her eyes closed with pleasure she couldn't even notice his body glowing, all she could feel was magical pleasure incomparable to anything created by the universe and scent of his skin as sweet and addictive as joy of life. She was in his arms helplessly obeying to his body language, letting him to do whatever he wanted to do with her, soul, but she couldn't resist it, she didn't want to resist the triumph of her youth. Darius was making her to devote herself to his wildness and laid her on the recliner chair. She was chained under his strong and heavy body. Her light pink thong and bra were the only things separating their integrity. When he squeezed the thong on her hip to torn it too, mixed emotions overflowed her. The first touch of the most sensible organs sparked the wild desire to feel him inside of her inexperienced body and that was the only thing she could dream about in that very moment. She was feeling how they were becoming one whole organism moving and breathing in the same rhythm. She was happy and did not need to help this wonderful experience, especially she was enjoying the presentiment of how wilder and wilder he was getting while enjoying her beauty. His temperature was rising up, waking up the natural beast willing to have her in more savage way and soon she was standing on her knees like a lamb knowing a big bad wolf would eat her but she was not rejecting it at all. Such a rapid emotional explosion made her to climax suddenly, goose bumps covering her body while trembling ran through her body like a thunder. Agreeable smile calmed her moaning lips but she could not get a rest. She could feel how much more he needed to use her body and it gave her appetite to drive him to final culmination with researching his body with her soft lips and pliable, wet, worm tongue... tongue that did not stop till he would set free from overwhelming energy burned up with passion. It felt like a sex under influence but with intensified passion and energy. She came on her right mind only after he cooled his body down and started controlling himself. He was standing to the window with pants on and unbuttoned shirt, enjoying the breeze and night city view. She was all naked and wet, confused and ashamed. She got up quickly, dressed up and left the room without saying anything... Or what she could possibly say in the circumstances in which she would never imagine herself. Even though, shame was not barer in this case for her to feel content and calm, probably Darius' influence was not vanished yet. "Who was she? How could she stand up to my power? What is it I feel towards her? Why I'm giving all these questions to myself?" -- A man was thinking who had never questioned himself before... Disported in his thoughts he vaguely heard a phone call: "Hello. It's Dr. Darius' office!" He tried to preserve the human ethics. "Hey. It's Nathan. It's time! They have warned us for the second time! There won't be any next time without a war!" He sounded worried and troubled but Dr. Darius smiled and answered: "Perfect... Excellent... I regret to mention that but I've been thirsty for their blood for years already..." by K.J. All about Life and Passion Ch. 02 Chapter II - Sweet Agony. What is life without honor and values? – Just simply existence in a beast's leather. Values - the only and true difference between humans and other creatures. However, sometimes the meaning of human existence can only be given when the animal wakes up within him, the beast that is fighting for the humanity. While the half of the world was sleeping with the sweetest dreams, someone with a mad face and teary eyes was fighting to his nightmarish reality. It was obvious that this fight was just a fun game to him but all that was reminding him something that was a reason why anger accompanied with tears in his eyes. Dark night was witness to how the green fields of Plorentalis got stained with blood. Someone was fighting with such enthusiasm as if it was the only reason why he existed: all alone against twelve rivals, bare handed ripping their insides off, with his fists grinding their bones like Christmas tree toys. This simultaneously fantastic and frightening scene was unseen by the eyes of the people. Even his opponents did not look like humans: their elongated, gray color fur-coated faces and almond-shaped blackish eyes located perpendicularly on both sides of black, flat and nasty nose were making them look scary but one rival made them all die with their own sharp claws into their own throats. "Well done, son! What would we do if not you sent from the skies?!" Nathan approached to Dr. Darius who was wet through dark yellow blood. "I guess you would have to find another mad man thirsty for revenge and justice." Dr. Darius smiled and took off the shirt to clean his face. Nathan, one of the oldest employees of NASA, was not surprised with Darius's modest humor as he was the first person knowing Darius on the planet Earth. "Nathan, listen, I guess I'm finished here. I have to leave soon. Can you clean up the mess without me?" "Sure I can, son. Is everything alright?" Nathan brushed his beard with his fingers as he thought something should have been wrong with Darius as he didn't want to finish his favorite business himself. "I'm good. I just have a very important meeting..." "Is it because of a woman?" Nathan guessed as he knew nothing else could be so significant to Darius. "No, definitely no, it's because of THE woman!" He answered and left the battlefield with a smiley face. "Wait a min..." He started but realizing Darius wouldn't listen, Nathan shook his head and pulled out a container of gas from a truck bed. He was quite an old man but after Darius' strange behavior his face crinkled even more. He would never imagine Darius would fall for any woman. Sometimes he was even thinking that Darius could do anything but loving just one woman and that's why he was not God's creature. While Nathan was burning the scene of fight into ashes Darius rushed back to home with the speed of about two hundred miles per second. That was faster than the speed of light and this time he felt like flying back to joyful life. After coming back to home and hot shower he was ready for his favorite patient, sitting in his armchair, tasting his favorite whiskey and listening to Frank Sinatra. Back in his town it was still late evening and as usual he used to enjoy the feeling of revenge in such moments, but now he had totally different worries and suddenly he was not confident anymore: "Why is she late? Maybe she is not going to come back? Maybe it was too early to move on and use her body for quieting my wild desires? Maybe I was too selfish? She may be more confused and lost now and never come back... What will I do in that case? Find her and bother her like a teenage guy begging for survival?!" She could even hate him now, fully inspired with distrust. And he again felt the frozen nooses of loneliness, frowned his eyebrows and emptied the glass in a gulp. He didn't even think about the fact that she was late for couple of minutes. "Damn!" Darius spoke through clenched teeth but knock at the door brought him back to life. The last fear ended when he opened the door and saw her standing there like an angel of freedom, releasing him from anguish of doubts. Green school skirt, white shirt and purple velvet high heels were making her naked legs so cute that her beautiful face and eyes were shining the temperature of passion... In general he was smiling while meeting his patient for the second time but now all he remembered was that he was not ready for this meeting at all: "Come in..." He said rolling his gaze over her body like a hungry predator. She was not expecting such simple words from him and that expression but condolence was helping her too keep calm as she was feeling the same way. She came back to find out what was happening in this room, who he really was, and find answers but she was confused and worried just like him. "Thank you..." She said, trying to enter the room with self-confident steps but after feeling weakness in her knees she sat down into his armchair and asked him for water. She didn't even notice how fast he was standing in front of him with a glass of hot water in his hand but emotional waves coming from him were blurring her mind even more. He wasn't a giant but in front of his well build body and serious facial expression she was feeling as a prey in a beast's refuge. "Do you feel any better?" He asked correcting her hair on her forehead with his fingers and looking down into her eyes. "I don't know. I don't know what's happening to me... It shouldn't be this way..." Delilah complained to Darius and bowed her head. "I guess, I know but let me help you first." He lifted her with his arms like a first loved bride and took her to his bedroom. "What a bastard!" She thought, because he didn't even ask her if she wanted to be there, but she really liked how confident he was and that sweet smell of his skin was somehow calming her down... It was even giving her a taste of his desire and temptation always helps to overcome fears and worries; especially now, when his bedroom environment was so tranquil, intimate, and so separated from the rest of the world. His king size bed was so soft and comfortable that even lifeless would rise up for spending a night there. She didn't know what to expect there but he wasn't hurrying up. Darius sat down on the red sofa standing in a corner of the room with maroon walls and when she was ready he started touching her feelings gently with his words: "Seems like, you are too strained. Because of the past life experiences you face the problem of assimilation to blustery feelings. Your own feelings will burn you out if you don't speak it out... So, what's your story, Delilah?" "Depends... Which one do you mean?!" She asked and smiled softly. "Those you always remember and come in your mind first..." Darius' voice sounded even deeper and serious while replying and she understood he wasn't playing. She took a deep breath, gathered all strength for openheartedness and started: "It's complicated... It's too long story to go through..." She sighed, not being sure where to start. "It always is, Delilah. You don't make life conflicted, no matter which way you follow - it always offers crossroads you have to deal with. And no human has been perfect enough to make right choices every time. Besides, sometimes standing on a crossroad doesn't mean that we have a choice at all. Thus, stop blaming yourself first and just let me feel the pulse of your life... Otherwise, I can't take you by the hand to guide." After thinking awhile she continued: "You're correct, doctor. Everyone faces own nightmares but we both are acknowledged to the truth: for some people life is a mother, for some it's stepmother. I think that's what life is to me – stepmother; especially since it has taken my mom away. After her death the only hope and the light at the end of the tunnel was a guy I entrusted my love." Noticing a tear on her eye, Darius again decided to forget about psychologist's routine and use his sense of humor to discharge the tension. "And... and you found out that the light at the end of the tunnel was a train? Did you get hit by one?" Her mouth ready to speak up stayed open after such an inappropriate joke, but soon she started giggling. Darius smiled and added: "Having an ability to feel the sense of humor even in hardest times means the hope to survive is not lost yet. I'm sorry. Keep telling." "Actually, yes, it was a train to carry my hopes and joy away. He was a childhood friend I fell in love with and don't know even what exactly happened but as people don't change I had to let him go..." "No, Delilah, people change... No one has seen a baby thirsty for blood; no one has seen a baby willing to start another world war, no one has seen a baby traitor – people grow up and they change daily according to environment, beliefs, weaknesses or strength and values they set up for themselves." "Do you want to say all is my fault and I should feel guilty?" "No, on the contrary, you feel guilty because you couldn't change him and thus couldn't get the relationship under control. Blaming themselves is the first reason why people can't get over previous relationships. All I'm trying to tell you is that if you have done everything to grow the relationship stronger and it anyways collapsed, you should let it go as you can never build a castle with chasing sand dusts. Relationship should be built on strong basis and if one of the couples changes radically the second one fails for sure. That's why the strongest relationships are built by adult people mostly, or by those who realize well what they really desire in life and stay firm for their goals. So far, right now, don't even think about blaming yourself! Now, keep going..." "Maybe, but how much is enough... Maybe I've not done all he needed to..." She paused and after thinking awhile groaned: "Even if I've done everything and led myself to destruction and to many pains because of him, how can I ever give orders to my heart?!" "If you had been his friend, his lover, if you didn't let him down, you showed him your love and adherence, after breaking up you gave him time to think over but he happened to be a wrong person anyways, then you should be sure you've done enough. People very often talk about unreciprocated love while love can't be unreciprocated. Unilateral feeling is just an illusion while love is totally different phenomenon in nature." Delilah was listening carefully but here she jumped into his speech: "You wanna tell me you know what love is?! As far as I know no-one has ever answered on that question..." Darius felt a trap in her question, smiled, gazed her into eyes and replied: "Maybe yes, maybe not... All I can is just to tell you the truth and share my outlook, make you sure that controlling your heart after particular practicing is possible – then you decide what to believe and how to behave." "That's what your style is? – helping your patients with grandma talks?" With this joke she expressed faithlessness to him and he didn't like it but kept calm and talking. "Grandma... What's wrong with grandma? – Wasn't she sweet?! Has she ever betrayed, lied to you? Has she ever advised you anything hurting you?" After Darius' words she slowed down giggling realizing she sounded stupid. "Besides, dear Delilah, if your grandma was energetic and sexy like me, had similar wide experience in relationships, I should say I'm her biggest admirer. Call me old school guy if you want but there are two things that I adore and can never be hidden: the universe and the truth." And now he giggled, but confused Delilah couldn't make up her mind what to answer and just tried to avoid the responsibility: "Whatever!" He was especially displeased with her last comment because if she wasn't eager to learn she would never succeed. She had to believe in him. Thus he stopped talking and gave her time to think over his words. After clumsy silence and realizing he wasn't going to start the conversation again, she couldn't keep from asking: "What is love?" "It's like the cancer... It's like HIV..." And he again smiled. "I'm serious..." "I'm serious too, but that's not what you think it is. It's just too much complex, so impossibly complex that there is no way to explore and see it just from one side. It is the strongest mixture of all the feelings that make our existence possible. Love can be discussed according to different dimensions such are: art, religion, science, psychology..." "Do you want to prove that love is real?" "People wouldn't discuss it over centuries without evidence... They wouldn't question it without feeling it..." "Then why is it that more love you give away more people you lose?" She sounded as a little, excited, girl willing to hear more from her love guru. "Because love consists of ingredients people are allergic to. Go ahead, dare to tell the truth to the world, either you will turn into a victim of inquisition or sentenced to life imprisonment. In most cases people can't get used to the truth, openheartedness, loyalty, while love is meant to keep those values up. People are so small within their shells that their weakness annihilates them. If there is no openheartedness and loyalty there is no love. No love – no trust, and without trust it never lasts..." He lit the cigar and inhaled the smoke with such pathos that even coal-fired train would envy. "And how do you think, Dr. Darius, thus which dimension tells the truth about the love?" "All of them and none of them." "I'm not kidding." She answered, nailing her gaze into the ceiling. "Neither do I. There are many things about which all of them lie but the pure sooth is just in whatever they all agree together. Painting a colossal map of discussions over love and overlooking real life experiences draws a huge line between love and craziness, even while their signs look similar and several medical researches proved likeness between a brain-damaged person and one in love. That is one more reason why people are afraid of love in most cases, they are scared of not controlling themselves anymore, do things they wouldn't do in normal relationships. It's pretty clear that love is not an independent, single feeling. It is a bouquet of all the feelings extremely concentrated and addressed to one goal. This goal is to make life better, easier and more loyal, make people stronger - give them the goal and stimulus for prolonging the life-line of mankind. He who created the world created it with a great arithmetical regulations and he knew people would need this motivation for survival. That's why one multiplied to one is still one. Person finishes growing up and turns into consummate creature only after he or she finds the second half needed to finish the process of completion. Biological energy, soul, or call it whatever you want, plays a huge role in connecting people. And this energy is the key to true relationship, not all the energies can host each other. After combining energies, some of them keep getting stronger – some of them not. But when you get used to hosted energy and then you lose the person, you starve for the part of his energy, emotional waves given from it. The biggest generator of this energy is your heart, so everything connected to the energy exchange is connected to your heart. Recent medical researches prove that a heart is the second brain with cells capable to memorize certain information. I hope, now you understand the reason why it feels so bad to lose someone. Yet, this feeling is meant for good things in life, to help people get together, but if it starts hurting, if it gives you signals that you don't need the particular person in life - trust it, because otherwise more you straggle more you lose. And finally you will anyways have to believe that whatever you feel is not love anymore - it's just disappointment you have to overcome. Love is meant to be given to each other not to take it away; love is meant to make you stronger and happier, not backwards... Never mess up demons with angels. Every time people tell me they are unhappy because of unreciprocated love, I explain that it's not what love is and realizing this basic root soon they start building a new, better and smoother relationship." "So, what's the solution?" She returned the answer just like she didn't even understand even a word from his guidance. "Do you mean that if the nature won't send us the correct person we should stay alone forever?! At one look I have everything to enjoy life: money, father who supports, friends but I still feel exhausted, unhappy." First, he wanted to reply her provocation but then he just got up, left the room and brought her purse, opened it, took out a hundred dollar bill and started burning it in front of her. She was looking at him thinking how impudent he was but at some level she liked his spontaneity. "What do you feel now?" He asked smiling. "I feel like you're wasting the money..." "That's the point." He again changed his deep voice timbre and started gazing her with persuasive, serious, face. "You feel neither pain nor happiness. Money and things in life matter for people only when they don't own them. People are strange creatures, when I ask what has killed the most people in the history of mankind, many answer that it is a nuclear weapon, some answer the reason is religious wars, and most of them name the money as the reason of global disasters. None of them ever answers that these people kill the most people, even one World War has taken more people lives away than any nature disasters and meanwhile, many nature disasters are caused by people too. Not weapons kill people, not alcohol, tobacco or drugs, people kill people and encourage the death to become earlier guest. Thus, my dear, the things you need are the ones we need even when we have it but still miss it, things that may last till the end of our days and give us the joy even in total poverty." He was talking gazing at her glamour legs freely relaxing on a soft king-size bed... His eyes started running over her body and breast, that was hardly hold by shirt laces and puffed soft lips rouged in pink. Of course she couldn't miss his looks warming her up. "What are you doing?" She asked and beautiful white smile cleaved the lips of her mouth. She was totally enjoying her manly attention that was ostensibly out of topic but deeply welcomed by her. "What I'm doing?" He whispered, slid his hands into pockets and rested his shoulder against the door frame. "What I'm doing... I guess people call it Adopyosis." "And what that should mean?" "If we believe to the dictionary it should mean the act of mentally undressing someone." She giggled: "Now, everything is clear! " "What is clear?" "What I've been doing from the very first minute I entered your apartment." She kept laughing softly. "Well, I would prefer to call it cave." "Should that mean I'm all alone with the beast ready to eat me?" All that conversation was just funny foreplay that was bringing even more sexual tension between the couple easily falling for each other, at least filling up with the wildest desires to experience more and feel more of each other. "Yes, beauty, you have guessed that exactly as it is! " He stepped towards her, gazing into her eyes penetrating the most savage cavities of her soul. She was feeling the temperature rise as closer he was getting and so warm that she wanted to spread her legs to cool herself down but his hand was already on her femur sliding up and carrying the edge of the dress. Now she was sure it was starting again and she wouldn't escape his cave without giving him all he wanted... She wanted to say something but his lips and tongue numbed her mouth with pleasure. She put her arms around his neck but she couldn't move because his heavy hand was already on her stomach chaining her to bed. Suddenly his hot breathe muttered "I want you more than anything else," his lips touching to the lobe of her ear. She sensed her body was starting trembling; desires were taking over every single inch of her sufferance. His hot breathe, caressing, and gravity of emotions were leaving her helpless against the blasted passion. She didn't intend to sound dirty but she knew she wouldn't hold it under the control anymore: "Do it already!" She sighed smiling. All about Life and Passion Ch. 03 Chapter III Passionate Harmony Probably, there should be a reason why people consider dreams unrealizable. Some of them even dare to affirm that anything that comes true doesn't deserve the honor to be called dream. Dr. Darius always believed that dreams are just the threat of life we have to resist - that dream is just a fruit of our imagination fruitfully yielding abasement and disappointment all alone. Surviving similar, harsh, painful feelings made him to decide that even flying-dreams are too heavy for anybody's shoulders. Left between the nature of his gist and realism he was trying not to admission his dirty mind to all that and just drift over fleeting life. Nevertheless, time to time he had to participate in making his patients sure that they come true because imagination and hope happens to be one of the best cures and catalysts for psychopaths. According to Dr. Darius' beliefs every person was a psychopath at some level and form. That's why life was so colorful and interesting on this so tiny and messed up planet - Earth. Overabundant fresh air and light in the room made her to open her eyes and feel the morning in all its marvels. Dr. Darius was in another room and with a feeble coffee scent spread in the air it wasn't hard to guess why he was fussing there. Delilah was not the biggest fun of foreign songs but a French song playing in another room sounded like a prayer for everlasting happiness. She didn't know where Darius found the song "La Vie En Rose" sung by Andrea Bocelli and Edith Piaf but she thought: "This is the song meant to start mornings like this one", French language and the melody of the song was so neat, free, calm, beautiful and intimate that it even strengthened her to overcome the shame of waking up at another home, in a man's bed for the first time. She was peacefully but greedily breathing fresh air, sweetening of listening to the song in waiting of Dr. Darius' next surprise. Melody was about to tell goodbye to its new biggest fan when Darius stepped in the room with accustomed smile and self-confident voice: "Bonjour mon amour," said he, placing a tray laden with a cup of coffee, muffin cake and a single rose, on her belly. She didn't know French but from movies she remembered that his words meant "Good morning, my love..." and with a broken French accent and fixed smile she freely answered: "Merci beaucoup". "You are welcome... How did you sleep?" "Haaaavenly," she answered with an excitement, "My dad is having a business journey in Europe so I'm free like a bird... bird in your cave..." She smiled and tried his coffee. "What you think, mademoiselle?" He asked about coffee. "I think... I think: enough French for today... What about French kiss and then little morning walk in the park together with me?" "I tried to make this morning as memorable for you as possible... Thus whatever you wish is the top secret order for your servant, lover and shade." He smiled and kissed her as if he wanted to learn the diversity of autumn with her lips. "Oh, my God, where did you learn kissing like that and where do you find those French songs and totally new ways to surprise me every time?" It felt like all her dreams were starting coming true. "There are two answers regarding your announcement: one will disappoint you, the second one will surprise you. So, which one you wanna hear first?" "The first one, disappoint me..." "The first one is that I'm not your God." She heartedly giggled at his regular, simple, but smart joke. "And what is the second one, the one that should surprise me?" "Before I would surprise you with different ways I myself passed a long way. I've been in every country of the word, have crossed every ocean and seen the places that even scientists dream to see." "Holly Jesus..." She exclaimed with amazement. "No, no, no, I'm not Jesus either..." He wasn't missing a single chance to joke this morning, seemed like he was on a perfect mood. "But I'm the man who will take you for a morning, fresh air walk and will buy you an ice-cream if you are a good girl." "And how you want me to prove I'm the best girl in the world? - licking it slowly and gently?" She bit left side of her lower lip, ambiguously talking about ice-cream. "Now, all you prove is that you are a very bad girl in the bad wolf's cave..." "Give me just one chance of that walk and I'll prove that a good girl is a bad girl devoted to her man." "Hellooo lady, you are starting spitting out the feminine wisdom... That's unutterably dangerous even for me. Get dressed, you gonna get the best chance you've ever had!" He glued smile on his face while answering firmly. That smile was the best armor in this moment for his joke that could be easily trampled by sharp contrary arguments of young lady. While she was taking shower he put on jeans, t-shirt and his favorite leather jacket. Set into sofa and first time for years already he didn't even think about pouring out whiskey. He was just silently sitting there and waiting for her, thinking how amazing it was that she was taking shower all naked at his apartment. She wasn't the first woman there and maybe not the last one too but this time the feeling was different. He didn't feel like she was at his home, he himself for the very first time was feeling at home because she was there. Any place is just a coordinate on the map unless we find ourselves somewhere and name that place "home". Appetite whetted eyes meet her coming out of the bathroom, drying hair with a white towel. As his chin was set against his fingers he was watching her with amusement and thinking was she really so perfect or he was the one thinking that way. Once and for all, it didn't matter: when we find felicity it leaves us helpless against questions and like sponges we become saturated of its fruits. "What is your secret today, Dr. Darius?" She asked, smiling setting down on his lap. "And what makes you think I have secrets? Do I look like a penguin secret agent?" "No, you just look younger and younger ever next time. And now this modern style of high school student..." "Uh, now I see. What's my secret? I guess, young lady sitting naked on my lap and ready to learn the next lesson..." "No, no, no...I sense where all that leads to! - We get it started and then forget about the chance to get out of this old, dusty room..." "No, no, no... I didn't mean that lesson..." "You gotta be kidding me if you're trying to tell me that our first date and walk in nature will be just another psychological session." "Private, special session - I would say..." "Why special?" "Because I haven't done it for anyone else." "Why? It costs too much?" "Yup, it's priceless and invaluable. Money is the key tool in therapy - as more person pays as more responsibility he feels and it helps him to keep the course. But there are things I don't wanna do with everyone because if a patient becomes obsessed with me or fall in love with me, that won't be fair." "Do you realize that you just let me know you don't mind being unfair to me." "No, no and no, one more time! That's why you are special, in your case everything is backwards. Falling in love with me would be the fairest thing in the universe!" "And that's what you tell every your patient?" "Maybe we haven't built any confidence yet, but one I can say for sure: something tells me it's gonna be fair because whatever we give away - should come back." "I guess you just messed up boomerang with life and love with flirting." She closed her eyes and shook her head to give a sign of distrust. When a woman smells bluffing, no matter she is correct or not, it's better to agree and apologize in some manner. Otherwise confidence will be built upon shaky ground and no pillars will save the ceiling above the home. Somewhat he felt worried - maybe it was just a result of their first date and bringing the relationship on ordinary level?! Making conclusions was too early anyways, especially while he could understand that the first date worries women more than men. Women always expect something special and dream about this date not to be resembled to previous ones, they see special hope in every next first date and are afraid to see it failing... Men -- well, they in most cases give just one question to themselves before the first date: "Will she spread her legs tonight?" Thus he had to consider the possibility of her emotional nervousness and just not to pay too much attention at her words. "Maybe you are correct, Delilah. I'm a psychologist not a magician to turn correct things into wrong and backwards... But I can still buy your favorite strawberry ice-cream to apologize if I have called your confidence in question." "Just an ice-cream?! Do I look that cheap?" "No, not at all, that's why I think that single ice-cream will be enough to win your heart one more time..." He answered and moved his eyebrows with smugness for his clever answer that trapped her to continue arguing. "Am not I correct? You aren't a girl selling herself out for diamond rings and luxury things..." And he smiled. "You are the most impudent psychologist I've ever met," She laughed and throw wet tower at him. "Mmm... smells perfect! Like a first date with you..." Darius answered, got up, put his arms around her hips and kissed her smiling. "Aaaalright, Mr. Don Juan, this time you escaped a feminine wrath... We gotta go..." "What if I promise you that I'll always escape that apocalyptic wrath?" "Well, then I'll promise to make you one and only man in my life and never forget about you..." "Hm... Sounds like a fair deal... Ready to start right now!" "Too much promises for the first date, don't you think?" "Maybe...maybe... but pretty easy tasks when a man is beside a woman like you..." And he again kissed her as if the doomsday was right at the door counting last seconds of their lives. "No, matter what happens, never make me feel that way again because I don't know what kind of heart you've got there but I'm afraid... Falling from the ninths sky isn't my hobby at all..." While she was feeling his temperature and desire to her, he felt that confused fear in her emotions and somewhat it made him sad. All he wanted was to keep her feel free, happy and pleased, but it would take time to show her that all this wasn't another playboy's game and he was really starting loving her. It didn't matter was it flirting or the most decent conversation between them, she wanted to leave that room and walk outside with him... Do and feel things like other lovers and be proud of her man in front of the whole universe. "I will... I promise... I promise nothing but trying my best to love and want you less every single day... less than I will love and want you every next day... But enough deep and promising talks for today, I don't want you to think I've been smoking something here before you took a shower." He again laughed and caressed the top of her nose with his finger. "I just think you over try to confess me in your desire to have this date with me and that doubts me..." "No doubts, just a simple, nice date... Let's go..." He answered to calm her down but neither was he feeling peace as he wasn't used to dates like that. In general he didn't enjoy outside walks on daylight, among the people who were so much different from him. That was making him to feel even lonelier. But this case was different because of her and he risked trying it out. The Sun was feeding the flowers with warmth of love and air was as fresh as on the first-born planet. Kids were building the castles of their future dreams in the middle of the park, not knowing that many of their dreams would be blown by the wind and forgotten by everyone. But life was perfect today and that's what our life is: living today as it is the only time we dwell; sensing the moment as the whole lifetime. They were following the track full of bypathers and enjoying observing how life was spouting around them. "So, how do you like it?" He asked as if she knew how dilettante he was in all that. "It feels good. And guess what we miss for making this day even more perfect?" "Ice-cream?" "Definitely.! You gotta show me where we can buy the best ice-cream ever." "You've never been here? Everyone who has been here at least for one time knows that nothing tastes better than Daddy Mark's ice-cream. My parents used to take me here when I was little. By the way, how did you guess I loved strawberry ice-cream?" Knowing he couldn't tell her the truth, just smiled and answered: "Everyone loves strawberry ice-cream." "And every man loves to watch how a girl licks it. Correct?" Darius laughed as hard as he could: "Sometimes I wonder why the hell you needed a physiologist? You are a genius!" "To invite me on ice-cream and watch me lick it..." She laughed too and kissed him on the cheek, then slightly touched to his lobe with the top of her tongue and all it felt so sweet he was ready to give up the whole world just for this girl. Daddy Mark's place was really astonishing: colorful ice-cream shop, mainly painted in pink, was built on a green, flower-full field. Light blue wattled chairs and tables for customers situated on the bank of river Lejamur were creating the view that could easily give a birth to any bright dream about fabulous future. Even sitting there and just enjoying the view would be worth of couple of lifetimes but it was getting even more heavenly with a strawberry, juicy aroma in mouth. As more you were watching it as bewitching it was getting. There was a difference between that view and heaven and that only difference was the reality in corporal life. After she finished enjoying the melting-in-mouth ice-cream he was holding her hand reached from over the table. He was deeply grinding his look into her eyes: "I feel happiness all around your body..." "You feel that right, Mr. Magical-feeling-teller..." "I feel everything about you..." "Ha ha, yuuuup, riiiight. In that case, let's play the game 'what a lady wants'?" "Name the rules!" Darius agreed without any denial. "It's easy and simple: you just guess what my next desire is." "Huh, 'easy' you say?!" smiled he "You call 'easy' to every man's eternal puzzle." He wanted to act like it was something hard to do for him. "Well, aren't you the master of answering to the everlasting questions?!" She tried to cheer him up. "Alright, in that case let me try my best: young girl has a nice date on a beautiful day, had the best ice-cream in the world... mmm... interesting... Is it a sex?" He acted like had a lucky try. "You should be a telepathist or the luckiest man in the world..." "The second option pertains to me more." "And what is your plan lucky man?" "To incarnate your desires for the sake of love, passion and freedom..." "Woooow, how poetic, sir, and where are you going to do it?" She smiled. "Have you never heard the saying 'love gives us freedom but sex manifests it?!" He returned the answer, seductively looking at the forest starting over the field. "Hm, sounded like that old, surprisingly wise saying: 'Love sucks -- real love swallows." She giggled and took a round-trip with the top of her tongue around her ice-cream. "Haha. See? That's what I love -- you learn pretty fast and become surprisingly wise with me." His strong look drilled a blank hole through her soul. And maybe she was feeling a little shy to admit it but she gave him the most desirable question for him: "So, how you want me to do it? Love you or really love you?" She winked and sucked out an ice-cream gulp purposely living vanilla cream on her red lip for to taste it from there lately with a flexible motion of her tongue. It was the first time she was provoking a man this much but she was doing it for fun and for her man; she liked how there was more and more excitement in his eyes. He loved how she was making him to forget about everything over the world, through the universe, and felicitously skewer on her provocation. "I've been always sure in just one kind of love but if there is something more I don't resist experiencing all of it all the time..." "Considering the latest events, I totally belong to you. Besides, you are my psychologist. You are the one to notify me the course, I'm just a Barbie played by your joystick..." Her tongue was sliding under her upper teeth. Because of a great relax last night and amazing morning her mood was inspiring her to play fool and experience something new, giggle and smile more... "I guess we need to walk... No, I don't guess, I'm sure about that..." "And where are you leading me? Back to your cave?" "Not at all, time to time any beast needs to escape and find its freedom in the wild world..." "Well, alright, whatever makes you happy... We can go to forest right across the field, in childhood I got lost there once and found one amazing place I hope still exists." "I'm ready and totally comfortable with getting lost with you anywhere in the world..." He smiled, winked and started crossing the field. Purposely he was walking after her for a while and enjoying looking at her decanted body and legs with smooth skin attractively moving after one another. Her childhood hiding-place was amazing and so calming that one would wish to stay there forever. Huge willows were creating amazing lane and cover for lovers, their flabby wands were touching the lake bank, lake that was so peaceful and green that could turn any pessimist into a writer. He was sitting on a willow's foot and she was on his lap again kissing him unforgettably. It was their first romantic outdoor experience and she was doing everything like she wanted to remember all it forever. His palms and fingers were sliding on her thigh motivating her for more excitement. She wanted to give him the same pleasure she was getting with him while she was licking him down from his lobe of the ear to his throat, leaving kisses here and there. Suddenly she kneeled and started opening his belt... They were both feeling little discomfort as it was their first outdoor sex, but she was doing it like they were just sitting there for a romantic solitude. She laid down and put her head into his lap like she was resting there. Extreme and thoughts about that someone could show up was just increasing the adrenaline of passion. The forbidden fruit was getting sweeter and sweeter when she slid Alexander between her lips and he pulled his head back to lean it against the tree. Now all he could feel was her wet mouth and perceptible tongue working slowly, all he could hear was some bird twittering somewhere deep in the woods. His fingers touching the endings of her hair were turning her on even more and making wet all her nature. Delilah decided to keep giving him gift and not to disturb him during the pleasure, just give it all to him till the orgasm. She released her lips and continued stimulating him with her soft fingers, kissed him, and then she slid her hand under the dress and moved her panties little bit to sit on him like she was just sitting on his lap for romantic date. He sat immovable and she was moving almost invisibly in case someone would show up. Darius' one wrist was around her subtle waist while the fingers of his another hand were running on her throat, neck, lips and breast -- like a blind looks for the light... She was hot but blood in her body was just boiling and he could feel it on her every sensible move. He was ready to explode, leave all his feelings within her but was holding as much as he could, wanted to experience the eternity of those wild and extreme feelings. She was smiling with pleasure and gyrating on his lap. She thought fastening her motion to make him climax faster but then remembered her ice-cream and the promise about the real love. As she felt it was getting impossible for him to hold it, Delilah overthrew herself on her knees and tried to give him as deep pleasure as she could, she was throttledly groaning and spinning her lips and head around his huge passion sensor. She herself experienced wildest pleasure when she felt impulsion in her mouth and how he released the tension of passion.