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Love's Harmony Ch. 01

By: simply_cyn



"Jennifer, I forbid you to do this." Jennifer glanced up from her suitcase at her mother, determination etched in her bright blue eyes. She reached for the folded stack of clothes sitting on her bed and placed them into the suitcase. Betty Matthews moved from the doorway to sit upon the bed. "I'm begging you. Don't do this."

Jennifer straightened up from her suitcase, her hands placed firmly on her small hips. "Mother, you know I can't stay here. Why are you doing this?"

"There are more options than running away. It just doesn't make any sense to quit your job and run off across the country."

"Orlando is not across the country, mother," she sighed, crossing over to her closet. She took the last of the clothes from it and placed them in her hanging bag, smoothing the wrinkles. 

Betty continued to shake her head in disbelief. "Don, do something . . ." she implored her husband, who now stood in the doorway. Jennifer straightened up to face her father. She had always looked up to him, admired him. She braced herself for the lecture she knew was sure to come.

"What do you want me to say, Betty?' he answered quietly. "She's an adult and can make her own decisions." Jennifer smiled lightly at him as she moved over to embrace him. Holding her back from him, he looked down into his only daughter's eyes. "That doesn't mean I approve," he added.

"I know," she said, suddenly moved to tears. It had been two months since her fiancée had left her at the altar and now she had to get away, to move on with her life. 

"I just don't understand why you don't stay here at least until you find a good job and then move," her mother added. Jennifer turned to face her, knowing she had a good point. She had had a good job here and she knew it didn't make much sense to take off for Florida without a job secured, but she couldn't stay a day more. "It doesn't make sense, Jen. You have a great job as a marketing assistant. You're next in line to become director, quite an accomplishment for your age."

"Mother, I know. But it hurts too much to stay. I can't do it anymore." Betty shook her head again, dabbing at the tears in her eyes. She watched her daughter, proud of her accomplishments and good sense. But this move had her devastated! She just couldn't understand why she didn't take care of the sensible things like a job and a place to live before taking off. She understood why she wanted to go, but her usually good-sensed daughter was all of the sudden acting on impulse and it worried her.

"Why so far away, Jen?" she continued. "Why not just another town?"

Jennifer stopped again, turning to implore her father. "Dad . . ."

"Betty, give it a rest. Let the girl be." He crossed over to place his hand on his wife's shoulder, her hand snaking up to cover his. "She's unhappy and she deserves a chance to make it all right for her." He leaned down to kiss her on the cheek and then added, "She knows she always has a place here," and then looking at her, ". . . if it doesn't work out."

Jennifer smiled again, crossing over to where they both stood. She hugged them, so glad that they were here for her. She couldn't have gotten through these last two months without them. "I love you," she whispered, hugging them fiercely.

"Jennifer . . . you'll call us . . . promise?" Jennifer looked at her parents in the airport, her huge blue eyes filling with tears.

"I'll call. I swear . . . every day . . . and you can come for the weekend when I get settled ..." But suddenly she couldn't go on. All she could do was reach out for them, blindly, barely seeing through her veil of tears. A part of her hated to go but another part of her insisted she cut these last strings with her parents and go on with her life.

Her father wrapped her in his giant embrace, holding her tight to him. "We'll see you in a few weeks. Everything is going to be fine. And you'll finally be happy, honey. That's all we want for you. We're so proud of you." His voice was gentle and soothing as he held her in his arms.

"Do you really think so?" She looked at them, sniffling loudly, and then fresh tears came to her eyes. "I love you so much."

"Now, you just be a good girl and enjoy it. This is your second chance, Jennifer. Not many people get a second chance in life." He was so rationale and she finally smiled. Her father pulled her into his arms and kissed her.

"Now, kiss your mother good-bye and get on that plane. You don't want to start this journey off by missing your flight." He kissed her one last time on the forehead as she moved towards her mother.

She glanced back at them as she ran toward the gate, feeling like a runaway child. Yet her parents were firm and kind and as loving as ever as they waved to her and they stayed until they could see no more of the plane. As they left the airport, Betty walked slowly, thinking back to this past week, to the wedding that had devastated her daughter, and then the last twenty-five minutes. A sudden wave of hopelessness ran through her as she wondered if this had been the beginning or the end of her daughter's happiness. She hoped desperately that things worked out for her in Orlando. She needed it . . .

Jennifer Matthews landed in Orlando at 10:03 that morning. As the plane touched down, she sighed to herself thinking of her fiancée, and all that happened this spring. She strained to see the scenery outside the window, the effort forming a frown between her fine cocoa-brown brows. Blue eyes squinted out from between the thick, long lashes. She longed to see him a thousand times, to toss away her pride and beg him to love her. Now, after two months of torture, she was finally on her way to freedom . . . she hoped.

Jennifer had been shocked when her father had pulled her into the church's bridal room right before the ceremony to tell her that Ty wouldn't be coming to the wedding. She hadn't wanted to believe it. She wanted to chalk it up to the fact that he father had never approved of Ty.

Sure her father was exaggerating, she had wanted to discuss the matter with Ty, but he had been nowhere to be found. Her father was furious over the whole matter and had ordered her to stay away from him, convincing her that it was for the best. Ty Crump had backed out, cold feet, with no explanations. Jennifer's heart and dreams of marriage were shattered. She had believed Ty's declarations of love. For months he had told Jennifer how much he adored her; how they would overcome her family's objections. They had been together as much as possible. Now - suddenly - it seemed as if it had been but an amusing game to him, and he had turned his attentions elsewhere.

She had not seen Ty that fateful afternoon, or any time afterward. She went straight home, and refused to see anyone. Jennifer hid away in the house, weeping and licking her wounds like a crippled little animal. She lost weight and the misery in her eyes was enhanced by the dark circles beneath them.

Now she sat on the huge silver bird, landing in Orlando Florida, a long way from home and the dreadful memories that waited there for her return. With a sigh, she twisted the diamond engagement ring that still sat on her left hand, when she suddenly realized that the rest of the passengers were beginning to deplane and she reluctantly picked up her tote bag and fell in line. She had worn a sleeveless slip-on cotton dress that hung mid-calf with matching white sandals. Her long blonde hair had been pulled back into a ponytail, loosely knotted at her neck. Even with the worried frown between her eyebrows, and the casual clothes she had worn on the trip, she was still a strikingly beautiful woman, and heads turned as men noticed her making her way slowly out of the giant plane. None of them had seen her during the three-hour trip because she had only left her seat once and that was to wash her face and hands. But the rest of the time she had just sat there, numb, tired, dozing, trying to reason out once again why Ty had done this . . . why she had decided on the spur of the moment to quit her job and head to Florida.

A moment later Jennifer was standing in the Orlando airport, looking around with a sense of disorientation, wondering where to go. She hadn't wanted to waste time in Texas by job hunting; she thought she could do it here. But now that she was here, she suddenly realized she didn't know where to start. As she walked through the airport, taking in the ads and posters advertising all the theme parks and things to do in Orlando, she realized that the first thing she had to do was find a place to live. 

After locating her luggage on the turntable, she headed out the doors to the line of cabs and vans waiting to pick up passengers. Hauling a cab, she felt foolish when he asked where to. Not sure of where to go, she said, "You tell me."

"Excuse me?" came the reply.

Jennifer laughed bitterly and then asked, "Where's a nice hotel close to the business section?" When he made a suggestion, she said that would be fine and sat back, wondering if it had been a mistake after all to come all this way. She set out to accomplish that task first. She spent all of that first day searching, but not finding anything that suited her. She wanted something that wasn't a closet but that was secure, and those were few and hard to find. That night after not accomplishing anything, she went back to her hotel, deciding that she'd do some checking around and in the meantime, find a job. She didn't have a resume' or anything ready and realized that her parents had been right - she couldn't just run off unprepared, but she was determined not to turn tail and return home defeated. 

The next day, she walked all over the city trying to find a marketing job, but they either weren't hiring or were turned off by the fact that she had come so unprepared. Frustrated, near tears, and close to five in the evening, Jennifer decided it was time to call it a day. Her parents were probably right . . . she had had no business running off to Florida to escape her problems and her past. It was like being on vacation and losing all your money ~ what was the use?! She just couldn't bear the thought of turning tail back to her hometown in failure. Besides, she could not be anywhere near Ty . . . it still hurt too much.

That's when she just happened to walk past it . . . Jive Records. She passed by and then backtracked as the sign caught her eye . . . Help Wanted. She looked at the sign again and then past it into the building. She stepped closer, cupping her hands around her eyes and pressing against the window, straining to see through the tinted glass. With a sigh and a quick glance at her watch, she felt she didn't have much choice . . . it was either go in and check it out, or admit defeat and head back to the airport. Setting her jaw, she reached for the door, determination etched across her beautiful brow.

As she walked in, soft rock music filled her ears as the comfortable lobby met her eyes. She quickly scanned the walls, taking in the photographs and records hanging there. "May I help you?" Jennifer turned at the sound, her eyes resting on a young man sitting behind the receptionist's desk. He had short brown hair and wore a pair of designer eyeglasses. He looked up at her from where he sat, a smile spread across his face.

"Hi," she said, unsure of what to say. Turning towards the front door, she added, "I saw your sign outside."

"Oh," he said, standing up to shake her hand. "Great! You're the first one to come in. I just put it out this morning."

"Wonderful," she smiled. "That must mean the job is still available. I'll take it."

He laughed at her enthusiasm, coming around from behind the desk. "Really? Well, maybe I'll tell you a little about the job before you jump to any rash decisions."

"Trust me," she sighed, shaking her head. "I want the job." Watching him for a moment, she continued, "I've been job hunting all day and I am desperate. I need this job, please . . ." 

Smiling, he escorted her to one of the couches in the lobby and quickly described what the job would entail. It was basically a receptionist and gopher job, but it was a paying one and would give her access to a computer. She figured she could use it to type up a decent resume', get organized, and then possibly look for a better job, so when he officially offered her the job, she accepted. 

Love's Harmony Ch. 02



The first week, Jennifer worked her tail off running here and there, making coffee, making phone calls, working on external and internal mail for the company, and greeting visitors and clients that came into the office. At the beginning of her second week on the job, she inadvertently impressed the Marketing Director for the company. As she was bringing him a cup of coffee, he was busy preparing a presentation for a new band they had just signed on. She happened to notice what he was doing over his shoulder as she set his coffee down. 

"You know, that presentation would look better by using PowerPoint. The computer system has it already loaded on the hard drive. I noticed it last week when I was typing up some new business letterheads," Jennifer offered.

"PowerPoint?" he asked, looking up at her.

"Yes sir," she said, forgetting her status as an employee and sat down in the chair beside him at his work station. "It takes all of the information you have on these overhead sheets and puts them on the computer. You can add animation to it, like bullets or points that you want to make, fly onto the screen. It's pretty impressive."

"You sound real familiar with it," he said, impressed with her ideas. 

"Well, I used it a lot at my last job," Jennifer added.

"Which was ...?" he prompted her to continue.

"I was a marketing assistant at a computer company back home," Jennifer stated

"Then, what in the world are you doing in a receptionist and gopher job?" he asked, amazed.

"I was desperate," she stated, standing back up, suddenly remembering what her job was and what his was. She had no business putting herself on his level. There was a certain order of rank in a company like this. He was close to the top and now, she was on the bottom. "I came out here on impulse and paid the price by not having a job. I should've known better." And then as she started to leave, she added, "Not that I don't like this job . . . I do. But I miss the marketing part of it."

"I could really use a boost with my presentation. How about showing me PowerPoint?" he asked. Suddenly, he realized he had more than a receptionist on his hands.

"I'd be glad to," she said.

"I'll give you the proper credit on the presentation," he said, smiling at her. "And, if you'd like, I'll see what I can do about your job."

She smiled, realizing she had stumbled onto a miracle. "I'd like that," she said, coming back to sit beside him. "Now, let's take a look at your computer . . ."

It wasn't long after that Jennifer was quickly promoted to a job more suited to her talents. At first, she helped get the others updated on marketing strategies that she had used with her company back home and then she was introduced to some new marketing skills that she was unfamiliar with. Seeing her enthusiasm and her ability to get other people on the "band wagon" of whatever she was promoting, her senior marketing director decided to propose a more challenging job to her: one of promoting bands working under their label. At first, Jennifer turned it down, not feeling she had the music experience and know-how to do such a job. Jim Coleman, her senior director, quickly convinced her that she had what the job needed . . . youth, vitality, enthusiasm, innovative ideas and a love for music. She was overwhelmed and ecstatic. It didn't take long before she realized she had the perfect job and one she loved: marketing and music all wrapped up into one. When her parents heard the good news, her mother couldn't believe her good fortune, but her father said he always knew that she could accomplish anything she set her mind to. 

She spent the first month, getting accustomed to the label's approaches and the bands that were signed on with them. She was put directly in charge of one group in particular. They had made it big over in Europe and Canada, but were now in the process of trying to bring it back home to the USA. They had gone multi-platinum in sixteen countries and had sold over ten million records worldwide. They were one of the only bands to have four top ten singles at the same time and had won the MTV Europe Viewer's Choice World Award the year before. After touring Europe and Canada, they had finally come home to the studio to craft more vibrant songs and sharpen their vocals. They were about to start touring in the states and Jennifer was in charge of promoting the tour. She was surprised and thrilled at the same time to find that she would be traveling with them as well. 

A stickler for knowing the clients she represented, Jennifer did her research on the group. They were known for their powerful harmonies, groove friendly beats, passionate ballads and charisma. She had heard that their stage show was dynamic and couldn't wait to see them perform. She had seen videos and footage from their European tour, but knew it couldn't compare to seeing them firsthand. The group was based here in Orlando and was a blend of pop and R&B. One of the stories circulating about them was that when they first tried to get picked up, they would go around to the local record labels and sing acappella in their foyers in an attempt to get noticed. Their popularity started locally in Florida: they sang in high school gyms, performed at Grad Night at Sea World and even opened for another fast upcoming act. Jennifer was impressed and excited about meeting them. She had a scheduled meeting with Jim in the morning and introductions would be made then. She hoped and prayed that she made a good impression. It was imperative if she was to be traveling with them over the next few months.

"Mr. Coleman, excuse me." Jim's secretary, Gail, poked her head into his office, interrupting his quick overview of what Jennifer's schedule would be like the rest of the week. "The boys just arrived. Should I show them in?"

Jim looked up from the chair where he sat across from Jennifer, smiling at her words. "Give us two minutes, Gail, and then send them on in." 

She nodded, backing back out the door and closing it shut behind her. Turning to Jennifer, Jim asked, "So, are you ready to meet the band?"

"I think so," she answered, excited and nervous at the same time.

Jim stood up, crossing over to his desk to lay his calendar back down. "They're a great bunch of guys, Jennifer. I think you'll really like getting to know them and working with them. As you already know, there are five members ranging in ages from nineteen to twenty-eight. They each have their own personality, but work together well. You'll have no problems getting along with them, I guarantee it."

He turned, leaning against his desk as he added, "The only one I should forewarn you about is A.J. He is pretty easy going, but if there is a one of them that is temperamental, it's him. He's a real stickler for the way he thinks things should be. He is one of the original three and feels this band is his baby."

"As well he should," Jennifer added, smiling at him.

"True," he added, picking up his cup of coffee. "I just want you to be prepared. At times, it may seem like he's after blood, but he's just trying to do what's best for the band. Your job will be to convince him that you are best for the band, understand?"

"I think so," she said, starting to wonder herself if she was ready to tackle a job like this.

Reading her thoughts, Jim added, "You'll do great. Just be yourself and show them what you've shown me. You know marketing, Jennifer, and we know you can do this job better than anyone else. If we didn't, we wouldn't be sending you on the road with them. Okay?" 

Just as he finished, the group walked into the office behind Gail. "Guys, welcome back! It's great to see you again." Jim crossed the room over to where they stood, shaking hands with each one, slapping them on the back. As Jennifer watched, she noticed the reporire they had with Jim as well as with each other. She could recognize right off who the baby of the group was, who the jokester of the group was, and had a feeling she already knew which one A.J. was.

"Guys, let me introduce you to your new publicity director." Crossing over to where Jennifer now stood, he placed a hand on her back as he faced the band members. "I would like to introduce you to Jennifer Matthews, newest member of Jive Records. Jennifer this is Kevin, Nick, Howie D., Brian, and A.J."

She shook each band member's hand, nodding an acknowledgement or saying a quick hello to each one in turn. She was met with smiles and friendly conversation from each member, although she could feel the doubt radiating from A.J. as she came to him.

"No offense, miss, but aren't you a little young to be a publicity director?" She smiled at his words and would have responded if Jim hadn't broken in immediately.

"A.J. put your mind at ease. Yes, Miss Matthews is young, but has been in the marketing business a while now and has made quite a name for herself back in Texas with her skills and talents."

"I realize that," he said, turning to look at him. "But, she has never worked in the music business, isn't that right?" This time, he let his gaze turn to her.

"That's correct," she said, standing directly in front of him. It was important to her that she let him know here and now that she could handle this job. "But I want you to know that I am very enthusiastic about this journey, A.J. I may be new to the music industry, but I assure you . . . I know what the public wants. We have to work together to convince them that they want you . . . The Backstreet Boys."

She noticed his facial features soften some as her words sank in and added, "My job is to make your job easier. You concentrate on the music part and I'll do the rest. Sound fair?" Jim smiled at her ability of taking over quickly and he could see A.J. was well on the way to accepting her, although he knew he wouldn't show it right away.

"We'll see," was all A.J. would admit to, although as he turned towards Kevin, he passed along a look of admiration for this spunky girl. 

They spent the next few hours going over their travel schedule, scheduled appearances and concert dates. As they worked, Jennifer observed each member of the band, trying to get a sense of who each one was. 

Directly across from her sat Nick Carter, the youngest member of the band. He was pretty tall and had long blonde hair that came to his jaw line and beautiful blue eyes. As he listened intently to Jim, his hair kept falling forward into his face and he would sweep it back with one hand, time and again. Each time he swept it back, his agitation grew at the nuisance of it. Watching for a few minutes, Jennifer smiled at his growing irritation. At one point, he threw his head back trying to get it out of his face and his gaze fell on her watching him. He quickly blushed and smiled at her, embarrassed that she had caught him. She smiled back at him, laughing to herself. Her gaze was reverted to the next band member when he cleared his throat and sat back in his chair.

Kevin Richardson was the oldest member of the band and was one of the original three members who formed the group. He was very tall with dark brown, almost black, hair and entrancing green eyes. She quickly recognized the confidence and maturity that he possessed, just in the way he handled himself in the meeting. She noticed that he wore a lot of silver: silver rings on both hands and bracelets on his wrists. He also wore two black leather bracelets and two small silver hoop earrings. He seemed very serious and professional, like the father of the group, but at the same time she could sense a gentleness and kindness radiating from him. She smiled and then let her gaze travel again down the line. 

Sitting next to Kevin were the two band members that looked a lot alike to her. The first one's name was Howard Dorough, better known to the band members as Howie D. He made Jennifer think of the stories she had heard of Latin lovers when she watched him. He had beautiful dark skin, long brown hair that he kept back in a slick pony tail, and brown eyes. He wore an earring in one ear and spoke Spanish every once in a while to A.J. McLean, who sat on the other side of him. 

Watching A.J., Jennifer wondered if she would ever be able to convince him that her best interests were in the band as well. Jim had been right . . . he seemed very unapproachable and distant. She thought a big part of it had to do with the sunglasses he still wore, even in Jim's dim office. She hadn't seen him take them off yet! He wasn't very tall and was thin with short, spiky dark brown hair that was dyed blonde on top. She wasn't sure about the color of his eyes, but was pretty sure they were brown because of his dark skin coloring. He wore large gold hoop earrings in both ears, rings on almost every one of his fingers and wore lots of chains, on both his neck and wrists. The one thing that looked really good on him was the go-tee he wore. It wasn't too thick and not too thin. Suddenly, his gaze was on her and she wasn't sure what to do. He made her feel unsure of herself as she tried flashing him a smile. His facial expression stayed the same and she quickly let her gaze travel to the last member of the band, Brian Littrell.

Of them all, Brian was the one Jennifer felt instantly drawn to. He was beautiful! Not just on the outside . . . but on the inside. It seemed to radiate out of him. When things would get too serious, he would crack a joke or make a face and she was instantly won over. Here was the clown of the group! She couldn't help but smile at him as she watched him and each time he caught her gaze on him, a wide smile would spread across his face. He had short brown hair with reddish tints, closely cropped to his head. She could tell he tried to used hair gel to get it to lay straight, but the bangs in front were stubborn for they curled up and went wherever they wanted. He had on white cotton pants and an untucked navy short sleeve knit shirt that showed off his muscular upper arms. When he smiled, dimples peeked out at the corners of his mouth. He had a very strong chin and jaw line with prominent cheekbones. When he made a face, his nostrils would flare wide open and the guys joked about how he could suck the table up into one of them if he tried hard enough. It didn't take long for Jennifer to realize she was going to like traveling with this bunch of guys.

Brian, too, couldn't keep his eyes off of the beautiful girl sitting at the table with them. He watched her as she made mental note of each band member and he could tell she was trying to figure out each one's personality. As he watched her, Jim's voice drowning out under the thoughts running in his own head, he admired her naturally good looks. Her forehead was high over delicately arched mink-brown brows. Below a small, straight nose, her lips gleamed a rose pink, perfectly formed to tempt a man's, the lower lip slightly more full with just a suggestion of a pout. It was her eyes, however, that held his attention. They were a beautiful, bright blue and sparkled as she laughed at Nick's attempts to keep his hair out of his eyes. Her long, gently waving hair was an unusual combination of sun-streaked light brown and golden blonde, with just a hint of a few strands of strawberry through it. Sitting at the chair, he couldn't see the rest of her, but remembering when he first entered the room and she had stood, he had noticed that she was small with a beautiful figure. Being that he wasn't very tall himself, he was glad to see that she was shorter than he . . . not that he thought it would matter. But inwardly, he was still glad.

Over the next couple of weeks, Jennifer tried to hide the fact that she was attracted to Brian . . . after all, they worked together and would be on the road together. She couldn't let her attraction to him get in the way of her job and his career, so she hid it. Besides, there was like this unwritten rule about the guys dating. It was a practice that went back to previous boy-bands like them: any notion of one of them having a relationship would put them beyond the reach of their lovesick fans, and as a publicity director, she knew those notions had to be quickly squashed. It was like the fans owned them. But knowing all this, she still would watch him at rehearsals in the studio: the way he closed his eyes when he sang, the way he used his hands to express the song, how he really got into the music. When he sang, she felt swept away. His personality shone, no matter what the situation. Everything about him attracted her to him; his beautiful smile, his gorgeous blue eyes, and that firm jaw. It sure didn't hurt any that he had an absolutely beautiful voice.

One of the things she enjoyed most about Brian was his ability to make people smile and laugh. For instance, he could do a dead-on impression of Donald Duck. Thinking back, she could remember how he was a little timid when they first met but then warmed up quickly, turning into a ham. She couldn't think of one time in the past few weeks that she hadn't seen him smiling all the time. 

What she found to be most interesting was the fact that Brian and Kevin were cousins. One would have thought that they would have been best friends, but it was Nick who Brian hung with the most, and Jennifer quickly found out why. Nick was like the baby brother of the group. He and Brian goofed around constantly or played Nintendo when they got the chance. Jennifer and Nick clicked almost automatically. They formed a friendship instantly and she was thankful for that. The more she got to know the group, the more she felt at ease, but she was still far from fitting in . . . especially with A.J. The tour started in just a few days and she hoped that, once on the road, A.J. would warm up and come around like the rest of the guys seemed to. 



Love's Harmony Ch. 03



Once on the road and as the days passed quickly, Jennifer felt more like a member of the group instead of an outsider. Nick did his best to include her in whatever they did; whether it was playing Nintendo on their bus television, or catching a quick game of basketball when they stopped. Howie D. was a total flirt and Kevin tried adopting her just like the rest of the guys. He was constantly making sure that none of them wanted for anything. And Brian turned out to be just an old-fashioned guy. There were many times on the bus that she caught him singing to himself or reading his bible. Growing up in the church herself, Jennifer was impressed that over everything, Brian stuck to his values and beliefs.

It was A.J. who was still hard to win over. He seemed almost angry and Jennifer did her best to draw him out of it. At first, it was difficult because she felt like A.J. didn't want her there, but the other guys insisted he was just that way. 

"Hi," Jennifer said, as she walked into the back of the bus, finding A.J., Howie and Brian. Howie returned her greeting and Brian automatically smiled as she entered the room. A.J. just stared at her as he put his sunglasses back on. It wasn't often she saw him without them. It was if he was trying to hide behind them. "What are you guys doing?"

"Just listening to some c.d.'s and telling old stories," Brian said, twirling the basketball he had in his hand. He had this great passion for basketball and was seldom without it. He tossed it up in the air and caught it again a few times. "Why don't you come join us?' he offered, patting the seat between him and A.J.

"Well, if you're sure you don't mind," she answered, eyeing A.J. When he didn't say yea or nay, she crossed over and took a seat. "So," she began, looking over towards Brian and Howie, "What kind of stories were you telling?"

"Oh just dumb stuff from our tours over in Europe."

"Like what?" she asked.

"Well, like the one time Nick knocked A.J. off the stage," Howie answered, starting to laugh all over again. Brian grinned and made a face. "It was so hilarious."

"What happened?' she said, grinning back at them both.

"Tell her, A.J," Brian said, trying to draw A.J. into the conversation. He knew how uncomfortable Jennifer was when A.J. ignored her like he usually did. When A.J. just looked back at him, his eyebrows rose, Brian told the story instead. "Well, we were over in Europe somewhere and Nick and A.J. were on the catwalk. Nick really got into the performance . . ."

Howie jumped in, between his giggles. "And he threw his arms out not realizing A.J. was right there beside him." He had to stop talking as he rolled over forwards, grasping his sides as he shook with laughter. Jennifer noticed that A.J. smiled and shook his head at his friend's antics. She smiled and then turned to Brian.

"So . . ."

"So, when he threw out his arms," he continued for Howie, laughing at the memory, "He caught A.J. off balance and over he went . . . right off the catwalk and into the audience." All three guys were laughing now and Jennifer couldn't help but notice how beautiful of a smile A.J. had.

She turned to him and said quietly, "You know, that's the first time I've seen you smile since I've met you. It's nice . . . you should do it more often." He slowly stopped laughing and looked at her. He wasn't sure what to say. She had caught him off guard.

Brian interjected, "That's his way of saying thanks." He tossed the basketball high into the air, this time missing it as it hit the floor and rolled into the hallway. "So, tell us a little about yourself," he said, turning to face Jennifer, his arm resting on the back of the bench seat they were sitting on.

She watched A.J. for a moment and then turned back towards Brian. "There isn't much to tell," she confessed.

"Oh, come on," Howie pleaded. "Rumor has it you arrived in Orlando jobless and homeless. What's up with that?"

"There's a rumor going around about that?" she asked, shocked. "Where? At the office?" She couldn't believe that had gotten out.

"Don't be so surprised," Brian said, grinning over at her. "The office is like a small town . . . everyone knows everyone's business." Jennifer shook her head, wondering exactly what they had heard. "So . . ." he continued, "Is it true?"

She looked at them a moment, wondering if she should trust them with all of her deep, dark secrets. She trusted Brian naturally and Howie wasn't a problem, but she couldn't help but wonder if A.J. wanted to hear her talk anymore than she did already.

That's when he finally spoke up. "If you want us to trust you, you have to trust us." Jennifer looked over at him, surprised he was contributing anything to this conversation. He watched her for a moment and then added, "We'd really like to know your story."

"Okay," she answered after a long moment, wanting to win A.J. over. If it took telling her sad story to do it, it would be worth it. "It's true," she said, looking at S.J. "I came to Florida on the spur of the moment. I guess you could say . . . I was running away."

"From what?" Howie asked, leaning forward so he could see her better.

She took a deep breath, unsure if she could tell the whole story without getting emotional. She shrugged her small shoulders, twisted the engagement ring that was still on her finger, and then said, "From a broken heart."

She stopped for a moment and then looked at Brian. "Three months ago I was planning the wedding of my dreams and then three weeks later, as I was about to walk down the aisle, my father had to inform me that my fiancée didn't bother to show up for the ceremony." Brian's face registered shock as Howie's registered pity. She could tell they were sorry they had asked.

"That's fucked up," A.J. said, taking off his sunglasses and turning towards her more. "What a jerk!" She smiled at him, surprised to find that she felt the same way.

"Yeah, I know," she said, laughing bitterly.

"What happened?" Brian wanted to know, his hand coming over to cover hers. She looked down, surprised at the surge of giddiness that flew into her stomach at his simple touch. She looked up at his face.

"I'm not quite sure, to tell the truth," she said. After a moment of thinking that one over, she continued, "I guess he decided that I wasn't the one for him. I don't know." She reached up to rub her forehead, her eyes closing at the finality of it all. It was if telling it out loud was closing the last chapter of her life with Ty. She opened her eyes to look at them again, but this time it wasn't so bad. "So, I packed my bags, picked a place and . . . here I am."

The guys just sat for a moment, watching her. "So, are you okay about it now?" Brian asked, his hand still covering hers. He squeezed lightly for a moment as she smiled at him.

"Yeah, I think so," she answered, as honestly as she could. "It still hurts to think about being dumped at the altar, but you know . . . I guess it happens." And then suddenly, she smiled at them. "So anyway, that's my story. At least one of them."

"And the ring?" A.J. pressed. "Why are you still wearing it?

She looked down at it, starting to wonder that herself. "You know," she began. "I think part of me didn't want to accept that it was over. I mean, we were together for almost two years." 

She stopped again, looking over at A.J. "But now, I think it's finally okay. So . . ." She pulled the ring off, looking at it one last time and then placed it in her pocket. "I guess it's time to get rid of it. But . . ." looking around at the bus, "I'm not exactly in the right place to do it."

"You could throw it out the window," Howie suggested as Brian gave him a look.

"Hell no!" A.J. said. "Sell it!" She laughed at his words, glad he had finally spoken up. It made her feel a lot better.

Later when she was alone with Brian, she finally got him to tell her a little about himself. "Well, I was born and raised in Tennessee. I have an older brother, Harold, who's three years older than me. We grew up in a fairly middle class family."

"What do you mean middle class? What's your definition of that?' she asked.

"Well," He thought about it for a moment and then said, "My dad worked at a computer company, which was later bought out by a company over in Europe. They work on typewriter ribbons, computer ribbons . . . stuff like that. And my mom worked at a church, where I grew up actually."

"Really?" she asked, laughing. "Me too!"

"No!?" he said. "Really? Were you there all the time?"

"Yeah," she said, laughing at the memory of it. "It seems like every time the doors were open, we were there."

He laughed with her. "Me too. As a young boy, I ate, drank and slept church . . . whether I liked it or not. I mean, I would've rather been playing on Sundays . . . but it eventually grew on me and I think it has a lot to do with the way I live my life now."

"I can tell," she said. 

He smiled at her and then said, "But I was also always running around, singing and being a comedian, making everybody laugh."

"You still do," she offered. He laughed and then sat back against the seat, folding his arms across his chest. She sat back as well.

"Ever since I could remember, I was always involved in the children's choir at church, and I was always singing up on stage. I was like, six or seven years old when I did my first solo in front of a congregation at the church." He stopped and then added, "This was a church that has like 3,000 members. But, you know; only about half would be at the services on Sunday morning."

She nodded as he continued. "But I guess that was a pretty big feat for a six or seven year old! I'm usually real shy around people that I don't know, but once I get to know a person, I can relax and then turn into a real ham."

"Really?" she teased. "I hadn't noticed that about you."

"Just stick around," he teased back. "You'll notice it soon enough." They laughed for a moment.

"You mentioned you had an older brother . . . what was his name?"

"Harold," he answered. "We're three years apart but we always got along. When we would have family get togethers, Kevin would always go hang out with my brother."

"That's right!" she said. "I keep forgetting that you and Kevin are cousins."

"It was like my brother and he were real tight, because they were the same age. I was the baby of the family."

"Oh, poor baby," she teased, reaching out to stroke his cheek. He laughed, playfully pushing her back. "So, does your brother sing?" she asked, wanting him to continue with his story.

"Yeah, but he doesn't really sing the pop, R&B style we have. He likes country music." He cleared his throat and then said, "He and Kevin would always get together and sing and pretend they were music stars. But, he never took it seriously . . . but then, neither did I until I was just thrown into it. In elementary school and middle school the girls were like, 'Oh you sing? Big deal', but in church it was, 'Man, you're good, you have a really nice voice', and that was pretty much it. I would get compliments like that, but nothing really big." 

"What happened to change it all?" she asked, smiling at him.

"Well, my school had a talent show when I was in junior high . . . this girl and I got up there and sang a christian song in front of the school. I mean, the whole school was there! It was a song called, 'Another Time, Another Place.'"

"I love that song," Jennifer said. "I sang that song once at my church with a guy in my youth group. It's a great song."

He smiled at her. They had so much in common. "Well, she comes on and sings her first line and then I come into the song, you know. I get like two or three words out of my mouth and right then is when all the girls in the audience started to scream!"

He laughed at the memory. "I mean, I was all decked out in a suit and tie, and there were spotlights, so I couldn't even see the audience because the lights were so bright. I heard the first three words I sang and then I couldn't even hear myself. It just blew me away! What's weird is, I had just gotten out of choir earlier in the day and I was a nobody, you know? But yet, when I stepped up on-stage and got behind those lights, it was totally different. It was like I was an instant star! I think that was the point in my life when I knew that if I could pull something off like that with my peers, then there definitely had to be people out in the world that would like it as well. And from then on, it was such a rush!!"

"That's an amazing story, Brian. It had to be overwhelming for you."

"It was, you know, at first. I mean, I was just thrown into it."

"What do you mean, thrown into it?" she asked.

"I figured you knew about the day Kevin called me from Orlando for BSB?" When she just shook her head no, he looked surprised. "Well, I was sitting in my U.S. History class. It was like the last class of the day . . ."

He stopped a moment, lost in the memory of that moment. Smiling at her, he continued, "So I get home and right when I walk in the door, I'm like 'Mom, I gotta tell ya what happened!' and she already knew. Kevin had already called both my parents, given them the low down and I was the last one to hear about it. I couldn't believe it was actually happening!'"

He stopped for a moment, stretching his legs out in front of him. 

"What did your parents think about all of this?"

"Well, my mom's main concern was my education. So, she got on the phone and talked to Denise, A.J.'s mom and she told her about the tutor, home schooling, how they go about their days getting their studies done. If everything worked out, then I would just fall right in with A.J. and Nick and be tutored together with them. That was her main concern, and it all worked out."

He stopped, drawing in a long breath. "Are you sure you want to hear all this?" He looked over at her. She was still staring at him, her eyes full of wonder at all he was saying.

"Yes," she said, resting her head on the back of the seat as she continued to watch him. "It's fascinating!"

He laughed before he went on. "Well, to make a long story short, we talked to management that night and they said, 'You gotta get down here and audition. We've heard a lot of great things about you and you gotta give it a shot!' I was on a plane at six a.m. the very next day by myself. Kevin and a limo were there to pick me up at the airport. My jaw was hitting the floor! I was scared half to death. I mean, here I was in Orlando, and hours before . . . I was just talking to him on the phone! Now, I'm down here, in a limo . . . I was like, 'Whoaaa, what have I gotten myself into?' It was like, POW! overnight my life was changed! But the minute I met management I was like, 'This is for me. I can fit into this. I love this.' It was nothing like I had expected. I expected it to be all formal, 'cause I had never auditioned for anything."

"Never?!" she questioned.

"No!" he admitted. "I didn't know what it was going to be like."

"That's quite a story," she said, leaning forward to rub her legs. It was a little chilly in the back of the bus, and she could feel goose bumps forming on her legs.

"You cold?" he asked, sitting forward.

"Oh, it's a little cool. The air conditioning definitely works on this bus," she laughed. He smiled at her as he got up and reached into an overhead cabinet, pulling out a throw blanket.

"Here," he said, spreading it out over her legs. "Better?"

"Much," she smiled at him. "I appreciate it." Sitting here with him was doing more than putting goose bumps on her legs . . . and to tell the truth, it wasn't from the air conditioning! 



Love's Harmony Ch. 04



The next afternoon, when they stopped for a break in traveling, Jennifer stepped out of the bus to stretch her legs. Being cooped up in that bus for those long hours were starting to make her back and legs ache. She had to get out and get some kind of exercise. There was a nice breeze and she was glad she was dressed comfortably. She had on blue jean, hip-hugger shorts that dropped just enough to show her belly button and a tank top that was cut short. She was wearing slip-on sandals so a jog was out of the question. Besides, when she jogged, she usually had her hair up in a ponytail and today it hung loosely down her back. The breeze would come and lift it gently off her neck and she closed her eyes, inhaling the fresh scent of the scenery around her. They were in Michigan somewhere and it was a gorgeous afternoon.

“Hey!” Jennifer turned, surprised to see Kevin standing beside her. His hands were shoved down in his blue jean pockets and he wore a grin on his face, something she rarely saw on him. He was usually the most serious of the group.

“Kevin,” she said, turning and bestowing a smile on him. “Hi! What are you doing out here?”

“Probably the same thing you are,” he said, looking around at the scenery. “I had to get out of that bus for a while. It’s driving me crazy to be cooped up in that thing.”

“Well, I was about to go for a walk. Care to join me?” she offered.

“I’d love to,” he said, falling in step beside her as they started off down the road. The buses had turned off the main highway and were stopped on the access road. A smaller, less traveled toad turned off the road close to where the buses stood and Kevin and Jennifer chose that road for their walk. It was an older country road, lined with huge trees that shaded the road they were walking down. The breeze brought all kinds of smells and the birds were singing. “It’s a gorgeous day,” Kevin commented, looking up into the trees. “It’s a shame we have to spend a day like this on the bus.”

“I know,” she commented, watching the trees as they walked.

“I heard about your story this morning,” he said, his green eyes sparkling at her.

“My story?” she repeated, looking over at him as well. She shoved her hands into her pockets as they strolled along the road. “What story?”

“About your wedding,” he said, watching her.

“Oh . . . that,” she said, looking back at the road in front of her.

“I’m sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up,” he commented, reaching out to touch her arm.

“No, its okay,” she said, squeezing his arm in return. “I’m just surprised that you heard about it.”

“It’s not like the guys are running around talking about it,” he assured her. “I happened to be talking to Howie and it just came up. I was the one who pressed the issue.”

“It’s okay. I don’t care if y’all know,” she replied, smiling up at him. He was a good head taller than her and she really had to look up at him. “I told them last night because they asked. I don’t want to hide anything from you guys.”

“I wouldn’t say you were hiding anything,” he commented. “When something painful like that happens, not many people want to go around talking about it.”

She shrugged her shoulders, replying, “They wanted to know and I needed to talk about it. Of course, I didn’t realize that I needed to talk about it until they asked.” She looked over at him and then said, “I guess that sounds kinda silly.”

“No,” he replied, smiling down at her. “It makes a lot of sense. I had to do that too.”

“What do you mean?” she questioned, her eyebrows rising at that statement.

Kevin looked back at the trees, strolling alongside Jennifer a moment before he answered her. “You and I have a lot more in common than you know.” When Jennifer just listened, watching him, he continued. “I was engaged to be married about seven years ago.” He looked over at her when she stopped walking, her curious eyes watching him. He stopped walking as well and turned to face her. “To my high school sweetheart,” he said. He smiled at her and then said, “I was nineteen at the time and thought I was truly, madly, deeply in love with her and she thought the same thing about me.”

“What happened?” Jennifer asked, surprised at Kevin’s openness.

He shrugged his broad shoulders, caught up in the memory of that time in his life and started walking again, this time back towards the area where the buses were. They had been gone for a while now and the buses would be ready to leave in a few moments. He was sure they were looking for them by now. “We fought a lot,” he answered. “You know . . . over silly stuff, but the closer we got to the wedding, the worse the fights got.” She nodded her head. She had been there! “So we both decided we weren’t ready to get married . . . at least not yet.”

“So, are y’all still together?” she asked.

“No. It ended all together when the band started.” He looked up, doing the math in his head quickly and then looked back down at her. “I guess that would’ve been about five years ago.”

“That’s awful,” Jennifer said, shaking her head.

“That’s nothing compared to what you went through to hear Howie tell it,” he said.

“Well,” she began, smiling over at him. “I wouldn’t have chosen for it to happen that way, that’s for sure!”

“So, you haven’t heard from him since then?” he asked.

“No, not a word. Not that I want to hear from him, you know what I mean?” Kevin laughed at that as they reached the bus once more.

“Where have you guys been?” Kevin and Jennifer looked up to see Brian standing in front of them. He quickly took Jennifer by the hand and led her back to the bus. “We’re ready to leave and I told them we couldn’t leave without you.”

“What about me?” Kevin said, following them back into the bus.

Brian looked over his shoulder and then smiled at his cousin. “Yeah, I guess you too!”



Jennifer loved the job, but the hours on the bus between scheduled appearances and concerts were long and weary. They were currently hitting seven cities in twelve days. Some were just concerts; others were appearances and/or performances at state fairs. In Minneapolis, they were scheduled to headline at an End-of-Summer-Bash for a radio station. She spent a lot of time on the camper that she and Fatima shared, working on her laptop, making sure all the schedules were in order or she was on the phone with their destinations, confirming appointments and reservations. Fatima Robinson was the band’s choreographer and had been with them since they had first started. She was a tall, exotic looking woman from South Africa. Her long hair hung in tiny braids down the middle of her back. She had dyed the front section of her hair blonde and it looked really good on her. Jennifer and Fatima had instantly formed a friendship and she was glad to have some female company on their long journey. When Jennifer was working, Fatima was usually doing the same and it was nice for both of them. When Fatima needed to listen to the music, Jennifer enjoyed it as well when she was on the laptop. But when she was on the phone, Fatima obliged and used the headphones.

When she wasn’t busy working, she and Brian had plenty of opportunities to get to know each other, becoming closer as the days rolled past. He would sit with her and they would talk for hours about themselves, finding they had a lot in common: religion, goals in life, family. Inside, Jennifer was thrilled at their blossoming friendship but knew, for the sake of the band, it could never turn into anything else. 

Unknown to her, Brian was attracted to her as well, but was uncomfortable about showing it because of her job and the fact that she was traveling with them. He felt it would be unfair to the other guys, and he wasn’t sure about her feelings towards him. At times, he thought she felt the same and then there were other times where he was sure she was just doing her job. She was the first girl he had met that had treated him normally and not as a star of a popular band. It was obvious that she wasn’t going to live her life around anyone: she had a job to do and she did it well. But she had everything he had ever wanted in a girl: gorgeous eyes, nice legs and a personality that shone. What’s more, she had the morals that matched his and had the same religious beliefs as he did. He struggled with the fact that she was basically untouchable while they were on the road. Above everything, he was a professional and it was obvious she was too. 

One day, after a technical rehearsal in Allentown, the guys were starving and wanted to go to McDonald’s, A.J.’s favorite place to eat. Jennifer absolutely hated McDonald’s!! “You’re not serious!” she said, as Joe turned the van towards the golden arches they could see in the distance. “That place is pure grease!”

A.J. looked over at her, pulling his sunglasses down his nose. “Are you dissing Mickey D’s?” he said, staring at her in disbelief.

“That is the worst hamburger joint ever,” she said, staring back at him. “My dog could cook better hamburgers than that.”

“No one,” he said adamantly. “No one can beat their hamburgers!”

“Really?” she asked, a plan suddenly forming in her mind. Here was another opportunity to win A.J. over. She turned to Joe. “Joe, skip McDonald’s and head towards the nearest grocery store.”

“No way,” A.J. argued, leaning over the front seat. “You just keep going to the destination in front of us,” he said, nodding towards the approaching restaurant.

Jennifer turned around to face him. “A.J., if you don’t absolutely love the hamburgers I make, I’ll go right out and buy you something from McDonald’s. Deal?”

He looked at her again and then at the McDonald’s as they approached it. “Well?” Joe asked, slowing the van as if to turn. “Let’s have it.”

“Okay,” A.J. said, looking at Jennifer once more. “You better be right.” As Joe continued driving, Jennifer turned around, a smug look of satisfaction on her face.

Once inside of the store, she moved quickly from one place to the other, picking up the items she needed to make A.J. the best hamburger he had ever had. Brian, Nick and Howie followed close behind her. Nick was pushing the cart and Brian kept jumping onto the front. She watched them, laughing with Howie at their antics. You would think they never got out!!

When they got back to the bus, A.J. sat at the table, refusing to help but watching them closely. Jennifer put the rest of the guys to work. She had Kevin scrubbing potatoes in the sink, Howie slicing onions and tomatoes, Brian mixing the hamburger meat and Nick plugging in the appliances.

“What do you want me to use to peel these things?” Kevin said. 

“Leave the skins on,” she said, looking up from her work.

“Leave them on?’ he asked again, looking over at her.

“Yeah,” she repeated. “The best part is in the skin. It makes the fries taste that much better.”

“McDonald’s doesn’t do it that way,” she heard A.J. mutter from his seat. She just smiled and continued her work.

“Okay,” Howie said, turning around, tears in his eyes. “The onions are ready.”

She looked over at him and smiled. “Did you slice the tomatoes too?”

“Yeah,” he said, reaching up to wipe his eyes. “What do you want me to do with them?”

“Cover them with the saran wrap that’s sitting over there on the counter,” she said, pointing towards the red oblong box sitting next to where he was working. “And then put them in the refrigerator so they’ll stay chilled.” He did as she told him and then she added, “Would you get the lettuce out of there and wash it?”

“Sure,” he said, reaching back into the fridge.

“What do you want me to put into this meat?” Brian asked, looking over at her. 

She crossed the distance between them and said, “Here’s a package of soup mix. Open it and pour it into the meat.”

“Soup mix?” he questioned her, his eyebrows rising.

“Yeah,” she said, smiling at him. “That’s the secret recipe. But don’t tell A.J.” He smiled at her.

“You’re real sweet to do this. You know, now that we know you can cook, there will be no end to the requests.”

“That’s okay,” she said, looking over at him. “I like to cook. Now, pour half a cup of water into the meat and pour some Worcestershire sauce over the top.”

“How much?” he asked, doing as she asked.

“I don’t know,” she said, shrugging her slim shoulders. “Just until it starts to soak into the meat and it turns a darker color.” She watched him for a moment and then, “That’s enough. See how it looks?” He nodded as she reached for the salt and pepper. “Now let’s put a little of this in and you can mix it up.”

“Where’s a spoon?”

“No,” she said, laughing. “Use your hands. Just make sure you’ve washed them first.”

“My hands?” he repeated, a look of disgust coming over his face.

“Oh Brian,” she said, laughing at him. “It won’t hurt you. Go on . . .” she prompted him.

“Jen, what do I need to put into these?” She crossed over to where Nick stood beside the fry daddy and electric skillet he had plugged in.

“Don’t put anything into the skillet,” she said crossing over to where he stood. “But you need to put some grease into the fry daddy, right up to this line inside. See it?” she asked, pointing inside.

“Yeah,” he said, taking the grease as she passed it to him.

“Did you turn the oven on?” she asked, opening the door. The heat that hit her in the face answered her question for her. 

“Now what?’ she heard Kevin ask.

She turned around, saying, “Okay, I’ll do the rest. Thanks.” She crossed over to where he stood. “Would you get me a bowl?” He did as she asked as she began cutting the potatoes into wedges.

A.J. watched her work and it suddenly dawned on him that she was busting her ass just for him. He got up from where he sat and crossed over to where she stood, now putting the potatoes into the fry daddy as Brian placed the hamburger patties into the skillet beside her. Her eyes suddenly met his in surprise as he stood over her. “Well, it smells good at least,” he offered and she smiled.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” she said and he smiled at her. Brian looked over at the exchange between the two of them and smiled. It amazed him to no end what she would do to win all of them over, especially A.J. It was clear that she wanted to make him at ease and Brian could see that it was actually working, slowly but surely. It was clear that she would do anything for any of them.

A few days later, that realization hit him again as Nick fell sick and wouldn’t have been able to perform if it hadn’t been for her. It was late at night as they traveled on the bus in order to arrive at their next destination on time for the concert that following night. Jennifer and Fatima had crashed on the tour bus with the guys and she was asleep in one of the bunk beds when Howie awakened her. 

“Jen. Jennifer,” he whispered, pulling back the curtain that allowed for some privacy. Brian was sleeping underneath her bunk and could hear them above him. “Jen, wake up.”

She opened her eyes, squinting in the dark. “Wh-what . . .? Howie? What time is it?”

“I don’t know,” he said. “I’m sorry, but it’s Nick. He’s real sick.”

“Where is he?” she said, instantly awake and swinging out of bed. Brian stuck his head out just in time to see her shapely legs dangle in front of him and then drop silently to the floor.

“He’s in the bathroom,” he said, leading her down the hall. Brian swung out of bed, still in his pajama bottoms and followed them down the hall. “He’s been hugging the toilet for the last hour and a half,” he explained. “He can’t stop throwing up.”

“Has he drunk anything?” she asked, worry lines appearing on her forehead.

“No, I don’t think so," Howie replied. “He can’t stop throwing up long enough to do anything. And he’s sweating like he’s in a sauna.”

“That bathroom is like a sauna,” she said, pushing Howie out of the way as she entered the bathroom. Nick was on the floor, his face ashen and sweat pouring out of him. She frowned and was instantly behind him, her hand on his back. His shirt was soaking wet. “Nick?”

He looked up, his eyes glassed over and she knew instantly he had a raging fever. She put her hand to his forehead and then turned to Howie. “Get me that oscillating fan that is in the back room and some ice water.” As Howie disappeared around the corner, she saw Brian and said, “He has a high fever. What did y’all eat tonight?”

“Pizza,” he said. “Why? You think its food poisoning?”

“Probably not with pizza,” she said, wetting a washcloth as Nick retched again into the toilet. “He probably has the flu. Nick?” she said, squatting down on the floor beside him and placing the wet washcloth over the back of his neck. “Nick? Are you okay?”

He looked up at her, exhaustion etched deeply into his youthful face. “Jen?”

“Yeah sweetie, it’s me. Have you drunk anything lately?”

“No,” he said, breathing hard. “I haven’t been away from this toilet in a while.”

She frowned and then turned to Brian. “Go get me a glass of ice water,” she said and then added, “In the side door of the refrigerator is a medicine container. Would you get it for me?” He nodded and then disappeared.

She turned back to Nick. “We have to get this T-shirt off you,” she said, pulling him back towards her. He lifted his arms and she slipped it over his head. His skin was cold and clammy and she wiped it with the damp cloth that had been on the back of his neck. When Howie reappeared, she had him plug in the fan and turn it into the bathroom. The cool air hit them and it felt better automatically. She took the ice water and soaked the washcloth in it. “Howie,” she said, never looking up from Nick. “Go find a clean T-shirt for Nick.” He disappeared again as Brian came back. 

“Here,” he said, handing her the glass of water and the medicine bottle. 

She took it and said, “Can you give us a little privacy?” she asked. Howie was there and she took the T-shirt, asking him to close the door. Turning to Nick, she said, “Here, let’s get this on you.” He leaned against her as she helped him put on the clean T-shirt and he stayed in her arms as she wiped his brow with the wet cloth and smoothed his hair back from his eyes. “Nick,” she began. “You’re going to have to take some medicine to make you stop throwing up.”

“Okay,” he whispered, his eyes fixed on her. She felt so sorry for him, lying helpless in her arms. He looked like a little lost puppy. 

She took the water and said, “Here, drink some of this.”

“Don’t I need to drink it with the medicine?” he asked, taking the glass from her. 

“It’s not that kind of medicine,” she replied, unwrapping a suppository from its foil package.

“What kind of medicine is it?” he asked, his eyes clouding over with confusion.

“Well, it’s a suppository. You have to put it . . . well, you know . . .” she said, handing it to him.

“You mean . . .?” He suddenly realized what she was talking about and it made him sick to think of it. “I can’t do that.”

“You have to,” she said. “It’s the best thing to stop the vomiting.” He stared at her for a moment and then nodded. “I’ll give you a moment,” she said, getting up from where she sat beside him on the floor. “Let me know when you’re done,” and she left the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

Brian and Howie were still standing outside of the bathroom as she came out. “How is he?” Howie asked.

“Well, I think he’ll be okay once he takes some medicine and drinks some liquids. We have to make sure he doesn’t dehydrate.” She looked over at both of their concerned faces and said, “He’ll be fine. Why don’t you two go back to bed? We have a busy day tomorrow.”

“What about you?” Brian asked concern for her marked clearly in his eyes.

“I’m okay,” she said, turning to look back at the bathroom. “I want to make sure he drinks something and stops throwing up. Once he’s back in bed, I’ll turn in.”




Love's Harmony Ch. 04



“I’ll stay up with you,” Brian offered.

She smiled at him and said, “That’s sweet Brian, but you need the rest. You go to bed and I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“I’m sure,” she replied, reaching out to touch him on the shoulder. His concern for her was touching and she wanted nothing more than to spend a night sitting up with him. “I’ll take care of Nick and you two go on. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Brian watched her for a moment as Howie took hold of his arm. “Come on. She’s right. We’re not doing anybody any good by staying up.”

He smiled at her one last time. “Good night,” he said. As he walked back down the hallway to his bunk bed, he couldn’t help but think again how Jennifer had taken over their lives, touching and caring for each one of him. Smiling to himself, he realized that he loved her and wondered how he was going to tell her. 



Love's Harmony Ch. 05



Not long after Nick's bought with the flu, things became more complicated for Jennifer than she had bargained for. In between their scheduled concerts on the road, the guys had to fly to Los Angeles to do a video for one of their latest single releases. It was a beautiful love song that was topping the charts at both the record stores and the radio stations. They had rented a warehouse in downtown L.A. for the video shoot and were spending the next two days putting it all together before they had to fly back to continue the road trip.

As Jennifer walked into the warehouse, she was amazed at the transformation that had occurred in just twenty-four hours! Just the day before, it had been basically empty except for some trash and old wooden structures. Now, it was suddenly a beautiful set . . . five different bedrooms to match the personalities of the five members of the band. She slowed down, watching the construction workers continue working on the sets as the film crew was setting up at one of them. As she walked, she noticed the intricate details that had been put into each set and she mentally tried matching the rooms with the band member it belonged to. 

The first one she stopped at was a dark one: greens, mahogany, velvets, and very rich tones. It was a very romantic bedroom and after thinking about it, she concluded that this one probably belonged to Kevin. Almost all the guys were romantics at heart, but this one matched Kevin's personality. "Whose set is this?" she asked Nigel, director of the shoot.

He looked up from his work, smiling at her. "Whose do you think?"

"Kevin's?" she asked, looking around at it once more.

"Bingo!" he replied, laughing. "You're really getting to know these guys."

"I'm trying," she said, shaking her head at the set. "This is absolutely beautiful! I could die in this room." He laughed with her a moment as she reached out to touch the velvet covered chaise lounge. "Can I have this when you're done?" she teased.

"Sure," he said and then, "If you like this set, you should go take a look at Brian's."

"Really," she asked, her interest piqued. "Where is it?"

He nodded over to the right of where they stood. "It's the second one down," he answered. "I think you'll recognize it right away." He smiled at her as she thanked him, lightly touching his shoulder. She walked up the aisle, watching the construction on the set next to Kevin's. She wasn't sure whose it was going to be, but guessed it might be Howie's. The workers were hanging electric guitars all over the walls and she knew that Howie loved playing the guitar . . . one of his many talents. This room fit him.

When she reached Brian's set, she sucked in her breath. This was her bedroom back home in Texas! It had a southwest theme; complete with a rustic four-poster bed covered with an Indian blanket style bedspread. A Hopi Indian ladder stood against one wall and an antelope's skull hung on the wall. There were two sets of standing candlesticks complete with candles. A hand-tooled rug was on the hard-wood floor in front of the bed. She stood for a moment, lost again in the similarities she and Brian shared. Even their tastes in decorating ran along the same lines. As she stood admiring the handiwork of the set designers, Brian approached her.

"Hey," he called, reaching out to touch her arm.

She turned quickly, smiling at him as he stopped at her side. "Hi!" came her answer, glad to see him. She turned back to the set. "Brian, this is just beautiful!"

"Yeah," he agreed, folding his arms across his chest. "I picked it out myself."

"This is my bedroom back home," she told him, crossing over to the bed. She picked up one of the throw pillows, fluffed it and then placed it back on the bed, in a different position than where it had been. "That looks better," she said, more to herself than anyone else. Brian followed her over to the bed.

"Really?" he asked, surprise registering in his voice. "I didn't know you liked the southwest."

"Well, what do you expect? I'm from the southwest, you know."

"That's true," he said, raising his eyebrows as he smiled at her. And then seeing the look that crossed her face, "You miss it?"

"Oh," she said, shrugging her slim shoulders. "Parts of it. But then, I'm glad to be away from it, too," she answered, her mind lingering on her ex-fiancée and the hurt he had put her through. She was glad to be away from him that was for sure! Turning to look at Brian, she smiled at him. "But most of all, I'm glad to be here, doing this. It's been great! Better than you know . . ." She trailed off, looking back at the bedroom set. She and Ty had had plans to decorate their first house totally southwest and right after the break-up, she had vowed never to decorate in southwest again. But as she stood here with Brian looking at this set, she realized she couldn't let what happened ruin her taste in decorating. It was beautiful and inside, she was thrilled that Brian liked it as well. She couldn't help but let her imagination linger on what he'd look like lounged across that bed . . .

"I think I understand . . ." he said, touching her arm again. He remembered the night on the bus that she had told them what had happened to her back in Texas and he regretted that he had brought up something that was still obviously painful for her. "I'm sorry I asked."

She turned towards him, touching his arm in turn. "Don't be," she said, smiling at him. "It's okay. I'm okay." She withdrew her hand from him, fighting the urge to move into his arms. Something about him made her feel safe and she wanted to feel his arms around her. "That part of my life is over and I'm glad. You know, sometimes things work out because they're supposed to be that way." She shrugged her shoulders once more. "It just wasn't meant to be. I'm convinced that there's someone better out there for me." And then looking at him, "There has to be." She wondered if he could read her mind. . if there was anyway he could know that she desperately wanted that someone to be him, even in the little time she had known him.

He looked at her, tempted to tell her he wanted to be the one to make it okay for her. He was drawn to her. . they were connected already and he wanted her to realize it the way he did. But something inside held him back. He wasn't sure if it was the band or her, but something wouldn't let him pursue her, at least . . . not yet. Maybe it was too soon after her heartbreak or maybe it was the vibes he felt he was getting from her. They hadn't known each other very long, but at times he felt he could read her like a book. Like now, a part of him said she felt the same way he felt about her. . the way her eyes glowed when she watched him, the way she smiled when he was near, the words that came out of her mouth. It was like she was guarded about what she said to him, but sometimes what she was really thinking slipped out before she knew it. But then, a part of him said he was only reading something into it that just wasn't there, just because he wanted it to be that way. 

"There's someone out there for you," he finally said. "You deserve much more than that jerk. Any guy would be lucky to have you." And then he wondered if he had said too much by the look she gave him. He quickly reverted his gaze back to the set. "Well, I gotta go to make-up."

"Are they shooting your scene first?" she asked, glad they were getting on another subject. She had been tempted to blurt out that she wanted him to be the one . . . the one to make everything okay for her. She took one last look at the bed, wishful thinking quickly replaced by the business at hand.

"No," he answered, glancing back down the aisle. "They're setting up at Kevin's set first. That's where they'll start. But my set's ready, so I'll either be after him or the next one. Have you seen Nick's set?"

"No," she answered, stepping away from the set and back into the aisle. "Is it finished?"

"I think so," he said, following her. "I heard its pretty wild."

"Kind of like him," she laughed. Brian joined her laughter for a moment and then grew serious. "Are you sticking around for the shoot?"

"I wouldn't miss it," she said, not willing to part from him just yet. She wanted to follow him to make-up and then stay by his side for the rest of the day. "I brought my camera and thought I'd take a few pictures."

"For publicity?" he asked.

"No," she smiled. "For myself."

"I'd like to see them when you're finished," he said, starting to walk back down the aisle towards make-up. He stopped a few feet from her and then turned, adding, "Jennifer?"

"Yeah?" she answered, turning back to face him.

"Everything will work out for you if you give yourself a chance to love again." His eyes spoke volumes, more than what he actually said, and she was swept away at the implications. Was he trying to tell her that he wanted a chance to do that very thing? She watched him for a moment, desperately searching for the answer to that question.

"I want that more than anything, Brian," she answered him; inwardly hoping he was getting her message. They stood for a moment, both lost in their own thoughts of what the other might be trying to say and then she turned and headed back up the aisle.

She watched them shoot Kevin's scene and she smiled. He was gorgeous, about that there was no doubt and the girl they had cast to share the scene with him, matched his good looks. She was a beautiful woman and they did a good job of shooting the scene. When she looked up, she could see Brian on the other side of the set, his eyes on her. She smiled at him, wanting to move across the space between them. Just then, Nigel walked up to her and touched her arm. "Jennifer," he began, and she could see worry lines across his face.

"What's wrong?" she asked, instantly worried. 

"I need your help," he said, taking her arm and leading her away from the crowd standing around watching the shoot.

"Sure," she said. "What do you want me to do?"

"The girl we hired for Nick's scene didn't show."

"You're kidding!" she said, incredulous. "What happened?"

"I'm not sure," he said. "We've been trying to get a hold of her and her agent for two hours now and nothing . . . not a word."

"What are you going to do?" she asked, staring at him. "What can I do?"

"It's too late to find someone else," he said, shaking his head. "Unless we extend the shoot until tomorrow."

"That would cost us a fortune!" she cried.

"I know," he said, his eyes locking with hers. "Can you help us out?"

"What . . .?" she began and then realized what he was asking. "You mean . . .? Oh, Nigel . . . I don't know."

"You would be perfect," he argued. "You're young, beautiful. Your blonde hair and eyes compliment Nick's. We couldn't have hired anyone else that would have looked as good. Come on . . ." he pleaded. "I'm desperate!"

She grimaced. Of course, she would do anything to help the band, but star in a video shoot? That was pushing it! "Nigel . . ."

"Jennifer, you're my only hope!" he said, guiding her down towards make-up. "They've got everything ready in make-up. All you have to do is get dressed and do what I say. You and Nick are already so close; it won't be that big of a deal. Please . . ." 

When they reached make-up, she turned to Nigel. "You haven't left me much choice," she said, her eyes boring into his. 

"I don't have much choice," he said. "Besides, you'll do great!"

She smiled at him and then said, "Okay. But you owe me."

"No problem," he said. "I'll tell Nick." And then kissing her on the cheek as she sat down in the chair, "You're a sweetheart!"

"You better not forget it!" she called after him.

The scene was to be shot in several different shots. The video itself would cut to each band member in his room at different times during the entire video, so each shot would be made all at once but would appear in the video separately. Jennifer was very nervous as she sat on the floor, preparing herself for the first shot. Nick's room was wild that was for sure. There was a circular bed in the middle, covered with a bright red coverlet. The floor was bare and the walls were covered with running lava-lamp type lights. She looked around as she waited to see Nick. A crowd was starting to appear outside of the set and she tried looking around for Brian but couldn't see anything for the lights. She had missed his shoot because of make-up and she was sorely disappointed. And now as she sat on the floor, she felt her stomach lurch. She was not comfortable doing this.

Suddenly Nick walked through the bright glare of lights and she was glad to see him. "Hi!" he said, a big grin crossing his face. "Boy is I glad to see you," he said, coming over to sit with her on the floor. His hair was falling into his face and she noticed that instead of the usual straight part down the middle, it was a popular zigzag part.

"How did they get your hair to do that?" she asked, reaching up to touch it.

"Lots of hairspray," he said laughing. "You nervous?"

"Yeah," she admitted. "Can you tell?"

"Yeah," he laughed. "It'll be okay," he said, his hand reaching over to cover hers. "The lights really help because you can't see anyone. Nigel will tell us what to do and then just follow me. I'll help you."

She reached over to hug his neck. "Thanks," she said.

"I should be thanking you," he said, grinning back at her. "You're saving our asses."

"Okay! You guys ready?" Jennifer and Nick looked up to see Nigel smiling down at them.

"Yeah," Nick said, rising. He stuck out his hand for hers and Jennifer took it as he helped her to her feet. "What do you want to do first?"

"I think we'll go in sequential order. We'll start with Nick by himself and then we'll put Jennifer in and fill in the gaps. You ready?" he asked, turning to face her.

"Yeah," she said her voice barely a whisper. "I think so."

"You'll do great," he swore, reaching out to squeeze her arm. The make-up artist was suddenly there, running a powder brush one last time over Nick's face as Jennifer walked off the set and to the left. As she stepped out of the bright lights, her eyes had to readjust to the dimness of the rest of the room. Suddenly she saw Brian.

He grinned at her and crossed over to where she stood. "Hey," he said. "I heard about what you're doing. That's great!"

"I don't know," she admitted, smiling at him. "I don't think I can do this."

"Sure you can," he said, grasping her hand. "You'll do great!'

"I'm pretty nervous," she said, turning to watch Nick as the music started. He performed easily and it made her worry if she'd ruin the shoot. She let go of Brian's hand and wrung her hands, her nervousness showing. 

"You'll do fine," he assured her again. He watched Nick for a few moments, listening to Nigel shouting out instructions.

"I missed your shoot," she said, turning to look at him. "I was in make-up. How did it go?"

"Good," he answered her. Suddenly he remembered that in Nick's scene it called for them to kiss and he was surprised at the way that realization made him feel. As he turned to look at her, he wished that she had replaced the girl in his scene instead of Nick's. He wasn't sure he wanted to watch her kiss his best friend. "It was good," he repeated. 

"I'm sorry," she said. "I really wanted to see it."

"It wasn't as fun as the scene you're going to shoot," he said, turning back to watch Nick.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you and Nick get to do some fun stuff. Y'all are supposed to kind of wrestle around on the floor, blow bubbles . . . you know fun stuff."

"Yeah," she said, suddenly remembering that they were supposed to kiss as well. As she watched Nick, she couldn't help but wish it was going to be Brian up there with her. Nick was cute . . . no doubt about that, but he was a lot younger than her. Besides, he wasn't the one she was interested in. "It's going to be weird when I have to kiss him," she said.

"Why's that?" he said, not sure he really wanted to hear about it. For that matter, he wasn't sure he could watch it. It bothered him to think that they would be doing it and probably not just once. He had done enough video shoots to know that it was rare that they got it right the first time.

"I don't know," she said, wondering if she could explain it. She looked over at Nick as he danced around, lip syncing to the music and tried. "I know you guys, and Nick and I are friends."

"It would be that way with any of us," he said, turning to look at her.

She wanted to say 'No!' that it wouldn't. If she was kissing Brian, it wouldn't be the same. She just looked over at him and said, "Yeah, I guess."

Brian's heart sank. She didn't think of him any differently than she did Nick. He raised his eyebrows and turned his gaze back towards the set. They had stopped the music and Nigel was giving Nick some instructions. He couldn't hear what they were and he didn't care. All he cared about was the girl standing next to him and the fact that she didn't feel the same way about him that he did about her.

"Jennifer!" Brian and Jennifer both looked as Nigel waved her over onto the set.

She turned towards Brian. "Wish me luck?"

"You know I do," he said, smiling at her. They both stood there for a moment, each wondering what the other was thinking and then, "You better go."

She smiled at him one last time and walked over into the lights, where she couldn't see him as she turned one last time to look in his direction. "What did you think?" Nick asked, reaching over for her.

"You did great!" she said, quickly hugging him. "I hope I don't screw it up."

"Please!!" he said, laughing at her. "You're going to make this video. I hope I don't make you look bad."

"There's no way you could make anyone look bad, Nick," she said, admiring his natural good looks. A part of her wished he wasn't so much younger than her. It seemed like it would be easier to have a relationship with him than Brian. He wasn't as guarded.

"Thanks," he said, smiling down at her. He had on bright blue leather pants and a plain, long-sleeved black T-shirt. That part in his hair looked great on him and Jennifer made a mental note to have the hairdresser try it on her. 

"Okay," Nigel said crossing over to where they stood together. "I think we're going to start on the floor." Both of them sat down in front of the bed as Nigel tried to explain what he wanted from them. "Now, for the first shot, Nick's not going to do any lips syncing. I just the two of you to play around . . . wrestle ... whatever. Not too many big movements and try to slow it down some. You can talk, laugh, whatever. We can cut the sound out once the music is put back into it. Any questions?"

They both shook their head as Jennifer looked over at Nick. He was busy listening to Nigel and she wasn't sure she could do this. She had on stretch leggings with a paisley tank top that came just below her breasts. The hair dresser had pulled part of her hair back and left the rest down. She had on a large cross necklace that hung between her breasts and was barefoot. It was supposed to be a playful and romantic shoot. Her long fingernails and toenails had been lacquered a bright blue that matched Nick's pants. The group standing around them could see a striking resemblance in both Nick and Jennifer. They looked like a real couple and Brian couldn't help but notice it himself.

The first run through was awkward because Jennifer was so conscious of the people watching. It was Nick who called cut and asked for a moment. He sat for a moment looking over at her and took her hand in his. "You okay?"

"I'm sorry . . ." she said, frustration building in her. "I've never done anything like this before."

"I don't want you to think about the shoot," he said, smiling down at her. "Just think of me and you on the bus playing around." He looked around the set and then added, "Just imagine that I've beat you at Nintendo . . . again," he said, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "And you're about to tickle me to death, just like you really do."




Love's Harmony Ch. 05



She smiled at him and said, "Okay. I think I can do that."

He looked out towards the lights. "Look out there. Can you see anybody or anything?"

"No," she said, looking out into the crowd. "All I see are those blasted lights."

"See, then we are really alone." He squeezed her hand once more. "You can do this."

"Okay," she said, smiling up at him. 

Nick turned towards the lights. "We're okay. We're ready."

"Jennifer?" came the unsure question.

"Yeah," she said, still looking at Nick. "I'm okay." It was amazing how relaxed he made her feel. This time they got it perfect. They played around and she went after him like she did on the bus. He was so ticklish and she knew just where to reach for. It turned out to look real cute on tape and she was happy with it when she saw it.

The next shoot was another fun one. This one called for her to blow bubbles from a large bubble wand towards him, into his face. They were still on the floor. She sat facing him with the pot of bubbles in her lap. She practiced blowing a few at him as he listened to Nigel give some last minute instructions. She could hear some of the crew laughing and she had to admit, she was having fun. All her nervousness was gone and she enjoyed teasing Nick. He would reach over and tickle her under her chin in between takes and she would reach up to brush his hair out of his eyes. During the shoot itself, Nick would reach up and pop a bubble as it floated in the air towards him, the whole time lip syncing to the romantic song that played in the background. It was a fun shot and Jennifer and Nick laughed throughout the entire process. In fact, everyone was having fun watching them . . . everyone but Brian. 

At times, he would close his eyes trying to get hold of the jealousy he could feel creeping up. He hadn't felt this way in a long time. None of them had been close to anyone lately to start a relationship and now that Jennifer was with them, things were starting to change. He tried telling himself that he had no right to feel this way. She was not his . . . she wasn't any of theirs. She was here on a job and she was now sitting there saving them. But still . . . as he watched her with Nick, he knew he was jealous. And to make it worse, he could see that Nick was just as infatuated with her as he was. They were best friends, yet right now; he wasn't sure how he felt.

The last scene that Jennifer would shoot with Nick was the scene where they were to kiss. They were moved off the floor and onto the bed. Just moving up there made her nervous and she giggled as Nick plopped down on the red coverlet next to her. "What?" he asked, laughing with her.

"I don't think I can do this," she said, covering her mouth as she giggled once again.

"Why not?" he asked, pretending she had wounded his pride, his hands reaching up to cover his heart. "You wound me."

She shook her head, trying to overcome her sudden giddiness. She was also suddenly very aware that Brian was probably still out there watching and she hoped he wasn't. She didn't want him to see this. But why, she wasn't sure. They didn't mean anything to each other than working colleagues and she kept trying to remind herself of that fact. "Nick, this is really awkward for me."

"I know," he said, leaning back onto his elbows as make-up rushed up on the set to powder both of them. Shelly, the hairdresser for the group, toyed with Jennifer's hair once more, making sure her face wasn't concealed from the camera. "Just pretend I'm someone else. You know . . . Mel Gibson or something."

"That doesn't help," she said, making a face at him. "I would be nervous if I was kissing him too."

"Well then . . ." he searched for something to tell her, and then looking over at her, said, "Pretend I'm your boyfriend and we only have a moment alone before your mom walks in on us."

She laughed suddenly at the picture he painted for her. She had been in that situation many times and it made her suddenly miss her family. "You're too young to be my boyfriend," she teased him. "I would've been robbing the cradle."

"Trust me," he said, suddenly serious. "No cradle would kiss you the way you're about to be kissed." She stared at him, her mouth gaping at his words.

"You are not going to tongue me!" she said and he burst into peals of laughter. She reached over and started to tickle him, oblivious to the people watching them. Nick kicked away from her, trapped under her hands.

"You guys!" came Nigel's call. "Save it for the camera!"

"Get her off of me!" Nick screamed, between his howls of laughter.

"Okay, okay," Nigel said, coming over to stand beside them. "Let's talk about this scene real quick."

Jennifer slapped at Nick's legs one last time and sat up at Nigel's approach. She glared at Nick, trying to muster the best evil look she could. "You are going to get it," she vowed.

"Good," he said, reaching over to brush her hair out of her eyes. She playfully pushed him away.

"This shouldn't take long," Nigel said. "It's going to be a quick shot of you two in an embrace and then the rest of the scene will be Nick by himself. Think you can handle it?"

Nick nodded as Jennifer watched them. Nigel looked at them once more. "You guys are doing great. Let's do this and wrap it up." He walked off beyond the borders of the lights and Jennifer and Nick turned to face each other.

"Okay, you guys get closer. Nick, put your arm around her and put that foot on the floor." Nick did as he told and Jennifer could feel her palms start to sweat. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Nick watched her, his eyes growing serious. "Remember what I said," he replied, putting his arm around her and drawing her closer to him. "We only have a few minutes before your mom walks in." She smiled up at him, suddenly aware of the cologne he was wearing.

"What is that scent?' she asked, inhaling it. It was a sexy scent and it helped put her in the mood for what she had to do.

"Uh, Gravity I think." He looked down at her and smiled. "Is it working?"

"Yeah," she said and he laughed.

"Okay, when you guys are ready," Nigel said and Jennifer looked out once more, wondering if Brian was still there.

Brian wanted to walk away but couldn't get his feet to move. "Hey, am I in time?" He looked up to see A.J. approaching. He looked over to see Nick pull Jennifer closer into his embrace and Nigel lean forward. "Oh, yeah . . . Good. I wanted to see this."

Brian looked over at him, disgusted. "You're a pig."

A.J. looked over at his friend, suddenly. "You're jealous," he said, pointing out the obvious.

"I am not," Brian said, folding his arms across his chest.

"Yes you are," he said again, starting to laugh. Brian ignored him and watched the scene unfold in front of him. He heard Nigel give the signal and then watched; as if in slow motion, Nick leaned forward as Jennifer's hands came up to gently cradle his face. He watched them stare at each other for a moment and then Jennifer's eyes close as Nick's lips captured hers. Brian's own eyes closed at the scene before him.

Jennifer was shocked at the delicious sensations she felt as Nick's lips covered hers. She could feel her body responding to his kisses. It had been so long since she had been kissed and she felt her resolve and nervousness melt under the hypnotic trance his lips put her into. His lips moved from hers and she opened her eyes to find his eyes boring into hers, speaking volumes and she knew that he had felt the same thing she had. As their eyes locked, her lips reached out once more for his, and then she could hear Nigel yell that that was a take. 

Nick pulled away from her slowly, his eyes still boring into hers and she knew that what had passed between them was more than just a video shoot. Where she had wanted Brian to take her was suddenly snatched away by the younger member of the band and she sat confused . . . confused at the feelings she suddenly felt awakened by the young man sitting across from her.

"You guys did great!" Nigel said, striding up to where they still sat on the bed, Nick's arms still around her. Only then, did he release her and Jennifer was aware again of where they were. She blushed quickly and stood up as Nick watched her, his eyes still reaching out to hers. She hoped he wasn't feeling everything his face said he was. Then turning to her, Nigel hugged her quickly. "You saved us, Jennifer. Thanks again."

"Don't mention it," she said, glancing over at Nick as she made her way off the set. As she stepped into the dimness, she heard a small amount of applause and she smiled slightly as she pushed her way through the crowd and past Brian. She wasn't sure she wanted to see him right now and as she passed him, he could see it in her eyes . . . and it hurt.



Love's Harmony Ch. 06



The next couple of weeks were different and Jennifer blamed the shoot. A.J. had loosened up some and teased her unmercifully about it. Howie asked when she was going to star in a video with him and Brian didn’t say anything. She wanted to ask him about it but then decided against it. Why would he care? Things were definitely changed between her and Nick. He was with her every time they got an extra minute. She hoped it wasn’t as serious as it seemed, but was afraid it was. They had been close before and she wanted that friendship to continue. Even though something had happened, she didn’t want it to go any further than that set. She still had feelings for Brian . . . not Nick. But the way that Brian ignored her and never did anything to show that he was interested in her the way she was in him, pushed her closer and closer to Nick. 

It had been almost six months since her break-up with Ty and she was missing what a relationship gave her. She wanted that with Brian, but it seemed that it was Nick who wanted to give that back. She was still concerned about the band and now she had the age difference to contend with. But if things didn’t change soon, she was afraid she wouldn’t be able to hold Nick back, or herself. He was charming, sweet, sensitive, and   . . . well, a wonderful kisser. He seemed determined to pursue her even if she didn’t want it. At least, she didn’t think she wanted it. The whole thing was so confusing and she blamed herself.

Jennifer walked out of the bus, determined to get a little fresh air before she went to bed. It was a gorgeous night . . . the crickets were singing, the moon was full, a light breeze was blowing. When she stepped off the bus and into the night air, soft guitar music met her ears. She looked over to the right to find Howie sitting on a lawn chair, strumming on his guitar. He was softly singing along with his playing and Jennifer recognized the tune. It was “I’ll Never Let You Go”, the song from the video they had just shot on video a week ago. As she walked over to him, she quickly realized he was singing it in Spanish.

“Nunca lastimaria tu corazon, Nunca te hare llorar. Prefiero morir que vivir sin ti.” Howie looked up to see Jennifer standing over him, a smile on her face. He stopped playing and smiled up at her. “Hi. I didn’t know I had an audience.”

“That was beautiful,” she said quietly, touched at his beautiful voice, even though she didn’t understand what he was saying. “Was that ‘I’ll Never Let You Go’?”

“Yeah,” he said, setting his guitar on the ground beside him. “We’re thinking about releasing a Spanish version of it.”

“I think you should. It’s beautiful.”

He waved her over to the empty lawn chair sitting beside him. “Here, have a seat,” he said, patting the empty chair. She walked around him and sat down, smiling over at him.

“You’re multi-talented,” she observed, looking up into the night sky. It seemed as if there were a million stars, all twinkling down on them this beautiful night.

“Well, I try to be,” he said, laughing. “You never know when this ride is going to be over,” he observed, knowing full well that even though the BSB were popular today, they might not be tomorrow.

“You guys still have a long time before this ride ends,” she said, looking over at him.

“Thanks,” he said, nodding his head at her. They both sat for a moment, neither saying anything as they took in the still night. Then looking over at her, he suddenly said, “Those hamburgers you cooked last week were great!”

She looked over at him, surprised at his comment. “Thanks!” she said laughing. “What brought that up?”

“I was thinking that I should cook for you some time.”

“You cook?” she asked, incredulous.

“Yeah,” he replied, looking back into the night. “I cooked a lot before you came along.”

“Why did you stop?” she asked.

“It’s nice to have someone else do it for a change.” He looked over at her and smiled, “I think they were getting sick of the same ole’ thing.”

“That’s an easy rut to get into.”

“I don’t do hamburgers,” he said laughing. “And A.J. loves his burgers!”

“So what kind of stuff do you cook?” she said, leaning her head back against the back of the chair as she watched him.

“Oh, you know . . . Chinese, oriental type foods.”

“Wow!” she exclaimed, raising her head to peer at him once more. “I’m impressed.”

“The guys were too, at first,” he said. “But then they got sick of it. They wanted some good old-fashioned American food.”

“You mean hamburgers, meat loaf, potatoes . . .”

“Yeah,” he replied, laughing with her. “They’re kind of the meat and potatoes type guys.”

She smiled over at Howie. “But not you?”

“Oh, I like that kind of stuff,” he said, sitting forward and grasping a tall blade of grass that grew underneath his chair. He stripped it and then placed the end in his mouth, chewing thoughtfully on the end. “It’s just not my favorite.”

“So . . . I know what you like to eat,” she said, leaning her head back once more, closing her eyes as she listened to the crickets chirping their summer songs. “What else do you like? I figured out the guitar playing.” She smiled then, her white even teeth shining in the dimming light.

He looked over at her, noticing just how beautiful she really was. “Well, I like to water ski, swim and sing of course.” He stopped long enough to let his gaze travel from her face, slowly moving down her slim figure to her shapely legs that swung gracefully underneath her chair and then back up again to find her eyes on him. “Eres bella,” he said softly.

She tilted her head to one side as her eyebrows furrowed together at his words. “What?”

He laughed softly and then said, “I said ‘Eres bella’. It means you’re beautiful.”

She blushed, her gaze falling to the ground. “That’s the sweetest thing anyone’s said to me in a long time.”

“Yeah, I bet,” he said sarcastically, laughing as he turned his gaze back out into the night. “I’m sure you get compliments like that all the time.”

“Why would you say that?” she replied, looking back at him.

He took the long blade of grass out of his mouth, throwing it to the ground. “Because you are,” he repeated, leaning forward in his chair. “You’re a beautiful woman and I’m not the only one who thinks that. I mean, look at Nick.”

She raised her eyebrows, turning her head to look back out into the night. “Yeah, I’ve noticed.”

“You don’t sound too thrilled at it,” he observed, watching her closely.

“I don’t know,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “It’s just that . . . well, you know . . .”

“You just ended a serious relationship and it’s too early to get involved with anyone right now,” he answered for her.

She looked over at him, watching him for a moment and then said, “Well, that too. But I was thinking more of his age. There’s four years difference between us.”

Howie shrugged his shoulders, reaching down to pick up his guitar once more. “No te preocupes.” Then looking over at her, he repeated, “I wouldn’t worry about it. If things are meant to work out between you two, they will.” She smiled at the simple wisdom he shared with her, and she wanted to tell him that it wasn’t Nick she was interested in . . . but Brian. But she didn’t. “And then there’s A.J. . . .” he added quietly.

Jennifer turned to watch him in amazement. “What did you say?”

He looked back over at her as he started to strum on his guitar once again. “I haven’t ever seen A.J. warm up so quickly to anyone the way he has with you,” he said. “There may be something going on there as well.”

She looked at him, her gaze leveling off as he smiled at her. “I think you’re imagining things,” she said.

“Maybe,” he hinted. “Maybe not.” As Howie began singing softly in Spanish once again, she just sat back and enjoyed the quiet moment, her thoughts turning to the problem ahead of her once more, of Brian and Nick and even wondering a little about A.J. as well. 



Later that night, after they had checked into a hotel, Jennifer was about to take a hot bubble bath in one of the bathrooms of the three-bedroom suite. It wasn’t often when they stayed in a nice hotel, but when they did . . . they did it right. She was suddenly interrupted. “Jennifer!” came the call from the other side of the closed door. She quickly glanced behind her, grimacing at yet another interruption.

“What?!” she asked, dropping the towel and stepped into the steaming tub.

“Can I come in? I need to talk to you.” It was Nick. Jennifer sank into the tub, the bubbles coming up to her chin. “Please? . . .” he begged. She smiled at Nick’s pleading, leaning back.

She thought about it for a moment. It had been a couple of weeks since the video shoot and nothing had happened between them since. She didn’t want to encourage him but at the same time, she wanted to keep their close friendship. It had been a while since he had really sat down and talked to her, and she missed it. “Okay,” she finally relented; making sure her tired body was concealed by the bubbles. When the door opened, he peeked around before coming all the way in.

“You decent?” he asked, grinning at her.

“As decent as I’m going to get,” she said, laughing. She sank deeper into the water as he walked in. “What’s going on?”

Nick crossed over to the tub, perching on top of the cabinet top. “I’m sorry to bother you,” he said, sheepishly. “I just need to talk.”

“What’s up?” she repeated, closing her eyes as she relaxed. They had had a long day on the bus and she needed a break before the concert tonight.

“Well, I was wondering if you’d do me a favor,” he said, staring over at her. She had piled her long hair on top of her head and a few tendrils had come loose and fallen to gently frame her face. Her long eyelashes rested gently on her skin, her cheeks glowed from the hot bath, and her lower lip stuck out just enough to suggest a pout. He was struck silent by her beauty and the tantalizing thought of what lay beneath the bubbles. He quickly ran his hand back over his long hair, his tongue wetting his now dry lips. As he continued to watch her, her eyes fluttered open to catch his gaze on her.

“Nick . . .?” she prompted, looking up at him.

He smiled, suddenly coming out of his stupor. “I’m sorry,” he replied. “It’s just . . . well, it’s hard to concentrate with you there . . . like that.”

She laughed at him then, grabbing the wet body sponge. “Then, leave,” she said, hurling the dripping sponge at him, wetting his shirt on impact. He looked down in surprise, the wet sponge sitting in his hands. He looked up at her, a wide grin crossing his face.

“I ought to drag you out of there,” he teased, throwing the sponge back into the tub with a splash.

“Please . . . do it,” came another voice from the other side of the open bathroom door. Jennifer and Nick’s gaze turned simultaneously to the doorway as A.J.’s frame suddenly filled it. “I’ll help, if you like,” he added, a gleam in his eye.

Nick laughed as Jennifer said, “You guys . . . that’s enough. Get out . . .”

A.J. smiled at her as he turned to Nick. “Kevin’s waiting for you. Brian and Howie are already downstairs.”

“Where are you going?” she asked.

“We’re going to go through a technical rehearsal one last time,” Nick explained, turning to watch her again.

“I thought you needed to talk,” she reminded him.

“He didn’t need to talk,” A.J. offered. “He just wanted an excuse to come in here and gawk at you. And as long as we’re at it, I think I’ll take a gander myself.” As he started to walk over to the tub, Nick quickly came off the countertop, tackling him on the door. As they scuffled, Jennifer laughed.

“You guys, take it outside,” she shouted at them. A.J. smiled at her as he dragged Nick out of the bathroom, shutting the door behind them. Jennifer laughed at them, as she continued her bath, now in peace. But even when they were gone, she let her mind linger on the problem that was still at hand. A.J.’s comment, even though said in a joking matter, concerned her. She had to be very careful when it came to Nick. He was at a vulnerable age and she was in a vulnerable state. She wanted the attention Nick seemed so willing to give, but it was coming from the wrong band member. Ever since the video shoot, Brian had practically ignored her and she suddenly wondered if it had bothered him. She smiled at that thought because if it had, then it meant that he cared. And she wanted that more than anything. She closed her eyes again, this time hopeful that things might be better than she had thought.



One night after their concert in Michigan, she and Brian got so wrapped up in talking that they wound up watching a sunrise together. They were sitting outside the bus on a grassy knoll that overlooked the city of Allegan. 

“Tell me about your childhood,” she said, her arms encircling her legs. Brian looked over at her to find her eyes on him. He shrugged and then looked out towards the horizon.

“What do you want to know?” he asked. Jennifer continued to look at him, amazed at the feelings that she suddenly felt surge through her for him. She knew at that moment, that she was in love with him. How was she going to keep her hands off him for the rest of the tour?

“I don’t know,” she said, resting her head on the top of her knees as she continued to watch him. “I heard that you almost died when you were younger or something. Tell me about that.”

He turned to watch her for a moment. As he searched her eyes, he realized just how beautiful she really was. The night breeze came towards them in spurts and caught her loose hair, blowing it just enough to frame her face with long strands . . . strands he wanted to reach out and brush away but dared not to. He smiled at her then. “Well, when I was four years old, I had this accident . . . you know, nothing serious. I skinned my knee and thought it was no big problem. My mom fixed it with a kiss. No one knew it at the time, but I wound up getting an infection from that.” He stopped for a moment, like he was remembering the past. Jennifer let her eyes travel from his face down to his midnight blue T-shirt, down the muscled arms that rested on his knee to the blue jeans that clung to his legs. As they traveled back up, she took in his deep tan, his strong chin, the dimples that showed only when he was truly laughing, his prominent cheekbones and then the blue eyes that sparkled at her. She smiled at him and he felt himself reacting to her presence. He turned back to the horizon, intent on keeping their relationship platonic. It was apparent to him that that was how she wanted it. God knows, he wanted her. 

Running his hand across his short hair, he added, “Then about two weeks later I had another accident over at my grandfather’s house. I slipped and fell on the concrete and kind of knocked my head really well, so my mom was worried about me having a concussion or something. That’s when they took me to the hospital. During those two weeks, a staph infection had set in.”

“It’s a miracle that you had a second accident,” she said. “If you hadn’t gone to the hospital, they might not have discovered your infection.”

“Exactly,” he said, shaking his head. “Other than that, I was a healthy four year old by appearance. I never had any disabilities. I was always able to run with the other kids. But that’s when they hospitalized me for two months.” He stopped and looked over at her. She watched him with interest, concern shining in her eyes. 

“It’s amazing how well you recall all of that,” she said.

“I’ll never forget it. I used to dream about it. I was real weak and pale for a long time. You know, I couldn’t do anything.”

“That’s amazing,” she said, shaking her head. “I look at you now and can’t imagine it. You run all over the place, play basketball. It’s just amazing.”

“The doctors told my mom and dad to go ahead and make funeral arrangements because they didn’t think I was going to make it.” He stopped for a moment, his mind wandering back over the past. “And my mom . . . like I said before, I’m the baby of the family and it was real hard for her to deal with.”

“I can imagine,” Jennifer said, unable to comprehend what his mother must have gone through. “Thank God y’all had the church.”

“It was a miracle, pure and simple,” he said, watching her. 

“So, you have a lot to sing about,” she said, smiling at him.

“You know it,” he said. “Having that experience made me have a closer relationship with my family, with my brother, with my church, and God. Growing up with that always in my mind, I stuck to my guns when peer pressure came around. I’m not saying that I was the best kid in the world, because everybody has flaws. But it just made me a better person. I was more proud of what I was doing.” She reached over and took his hand in hers. He was too perfect . . . too nice. She couldn’t help but be drawn to him. It was if he was her soul mate and she already recognized it. He squeezed her hand, lacing his fingers through hers and then looked into her eyes. 

“You know,” she began, looking down at their hands and then back up at him. “I truly believe that God has a purpose for each one of us, and yours . . . yours is to use the gift he gave you. You are good at it, Brian. And what’s even better, you appreciate it.”“I look back on the experiences and I’ve learned from the past and I’ve put it into everyday life. It’s just an experience that you can’t get rid of . . . that you have to turn around and use to your benefit.”

Jennifer absorbed all he said for a moment and then, “Who do you think most influenced your singing?” she asked. He looked over at her, surprised at her continued interest in his music.

“I don’t know. I guess it was other bands like us . . . Boyz II Men, Colour Me Badd.”

“What about your family?” she asked, raising her head to look at him. She reached up to sweep her hair back again as the wind picked up. “I guess they were real supportive or they wouldn’t have let you go off to Orlando to join the band.” 

“Yeah,” he answered, a grin crossing his face. “They were always supportive of me. My parents were probably the most influential people in my life, but it was my big brother, Harold, that kept me going.”

“What do you mean?” she prompted.

“Well,” he said, laughing at the memory. “Being a big brother, he kicked my tail all the time, but then, he always picked me up and pushed me to succeed in whatever I was doing.”

“That’s great,” she said, turning to stare at the horizon. It was a beautiful night and one she was glad to be sharing with Brian. As the breeze picked up, she let go of her hand, shivering. Brian looked over and caught her hugging her legs close to her.

“Cold?” he asked, taking off his wind jacket and wrapping it around her shoulders.

“Thanks,” she whispered, her eyes locking with his. For a few minutes, they sat this way and Jennifer fought the urge to lean into him. She was here to do a job, and she was certain that to Brian, they were just friends. Brian, too, fought the urge to take her into his arms. They had been on the bus for only five weeks, but he felt like he had known her for a lifetime. He loved her smile, her beautiful huge blue eyes, and her good heart. As he watched her, he felt overwhelmed by her beauty and her spirit. He reached back over for her hand, taking it once more in his. She didn’t say anything. She just smiled.

They sat together for a long time, just talking. They talked a great deal about their childhoods and how they had been raised similarly: practically raised in a Baptist church, singing, and encircled in a loving family. The more they got to know each other, the more Jennifer was convinced that this was the guy for her. When the sun peeked over the horizon, they were both surprised at how quickly the time had flown, their hands still clasped together.  



Love's Harmony Ch. 07



"Brian," Nick called, running up to his best friend as they waited backstage. Finally, all the hoopla of the backstage pre-concert party was over and they had some time to concentrate on the concert at hand. They were scheduled to go on stage in twenty minutes.

"Yeah?" he replied, turning to look over his shoulder.

"Hey man, I got to talk to ya," he said, a wide smile beaming across his face.

"Sure, what's up?" he said, turning to face his friend. "You look like the cat who just swallowed the canary."

"Do I?' he laughed, dancing around Brian, playfully boxing at him.

"You sure are in a good mood," he said, playing back at him. This was the best time for the both of them . . . right before they went onto stage. They were all psyched up for this concert. It had been sold out since the day tickets went on sale. 

"I'm in love," Nick said, still dancing around. Brian just looked at him, his smile slightly fading. He had a feeling where this was going.

Is that right?" he asked, turning back to peek out at the crowd.

"Yeah man," Nick said, coming around to stand beside him. "You'll never guess with who."

"Oh, I think I can," he muttered.

"What did you say?" Nick asked, not hearing him over the screaming coming from the stage area.

Brian turned back around and said, "I said, who?" 

Nick grinned back at him. "Jennifer . . . I think I'm in love with Jennifer."

Brian took in a deep breath, a sick feeling coming to his stomach. "Isn't she a little old for you, Nick?"

"Oh shit," he said, shaking his head. "That's so lame. She's just twenty-three."

"And you're nineteen," Brian reminded him.

"Oh that doesn't matter," Nick replied, dancing around again. "Have you seen her tonight? She is hot!" Brian shook his head. He wasn't sure he wanted to see her. It was becoming painful to be around her and not be able to touch her . . . not be able to take her in his arms like he longed to do. "She's got on these blue jeans and man, they don't leave anything to the imagination and this tank top with these spaghetti straps . . ."

"Okay, I get the picture," he said, turning back towards him. "Where is she?"

"I'm not sure," Nick said, turning around to locate her himself. "I'd like to see her again before we go on. I need a little good luck . . ." Brian watched him for a moment, wondering what to do now. Things just kept getting more complicated.

The concert had been over for almost three hours now and Brian still couldn't sleep. He lay in his bunk bed willing sleep to overtake him, but it wouldn't come to give him any relief. All night, all during the concert, all he could think of was Nick and Jennifer. Every love song they had sung, all he could think of was her. And now Nick had to go and make it even more difficult than it had been before. As he lay there, his curtain drawn, he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep until he had seen her one last time.

"Hey, you okay?" Jennifer looked up from her window seat to see Brian looking down at her, clad only in sweat bottoms.

She smiled at him, unfolding her legs and placing them on the floor, freeing up the seat beside her. "Yeah, I'm okay," she answered.

"Can I sit down?" he asked, pointing at the seat next to her. She nodded, looking back out the window at the dark shadows passing by. "What are you doing still up at this hour?" he asked, settling in next to her on the bench seat.

"I couldn't sleep," she answered, turning back to face him. "How about you? What are you doing still up?"

"I'm still psyched from the show," he answered, searching her face. The more time he spent with her, the more he wanted her. This would have been the perfect time for him to make a move, but it was Nick that kept him from doing anything. He had made it impossible for him to make a move on her when Nick had already fallen for her. If only he wasn't his best friend!

"You guys did a great job tonight. I can't believe the enthusiasm and energy y'all put into every show." She stopped, smiling at him. He looked tired, but happy. "You have to be exhausted.

"I am," he said, yawning at his own words. "I just can't relax."

"Here, let me help." She turned towards him, turning his shoulders so his back was to her. She slowly, but thoroughly started to massage his shoulders. She could feel him relax at her touch. "Better?' she asked.

"Mmmm . . . much," he answered, closing his eyes. She had great hands and her touch made Brian wonder even more how he could work things out for them. He wanted her, but at the same time, he didn't want to hurt Nick. He could feel her hands rubbing his shoulders, his back, his upper arms. "You're really good at this," he said, leaning forward to give her better access to his lower back.

"Well, I used to massage my dad's back after a long day at work," she said, now lightly running her long nails across his back. "A friend of mine is a massage therapist and she taught me a few basics."

"Well, you learned well. It feels great." She smiled at his words.

"Are you relaxing any?" she asked, rubbing his neck. Just touching his bare skin sent tingles from her fingertips straight to her stomach. Being this near, touching him like this, made her want to turn him around, take him in her arms, and kiss the breath out of him. But all she dared do was continue giving him the best massage she could muster, hoping her hands weren't trembling with the desire she felt for him.

"Yeah," he said, closing his eyes as he felt her hands on him. As he sat there with her, he softly began to sing. "I can't imagine life without your love and even forever don't seem like long enough."

Jennifer stopped for a moment, her hands resting on his shoulders. "What song is that?" she asked.

Brian looked up for a moment, saying, "It's a new one we're working on."

"Sing some more," she urged, going back to her massage.

Brian smiled and then continued, "Every time I breathe I take you in and my heart beats again. Baby I can't help it, you keep me drowning in your love.."

At that moment, Nick passed by them, only turning his head to look at them. To Jennifer, it looked as nothing but a passing glance, but Brian looked up to see the surprise and slight anger shining in his eyes. He sat up straighter, watching Nick as he continued down the aisle of the bus and then disappear into the back.

Jennifer stopped, peering around Brian's shoulder to catch his gaze. "What?" she asked, sensing him momentarily tense up.

He turned back to look at her, not sure what to say. "Nothing. Why?"

"You tensed up," she replied, running a hand back down his back.

"Oh . . . it's nothing, really . . ."

"Come on, Brian. Tell me."

He turned to sit beside her again, glancing back over his shoulder towards the back of the bus. "Well . . . it's Nick."

"Nick?" she questioned, looking confused at the concern in his face. "What's wrong with Nick?"

"Well . . . I'm not sure how to say it." He glanced over at her, rubbing his hands across the tops of his sweat bottoms.

"Just say it," she said, curling her legs underneath her again.

Brian looked over at her, turning to face her a little bit more. When he did, he put his arm over the back of the bench seat. "Nick," he began, "I think he's in love with you."

All she could do was look at him for a moment, her eyebrows lifting slightly on her forehead. So ... she had been right all along. Nick did feel something for her. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah," he said, searching her face for a reaction. "Nick is in love with you."

Jennifer continued to stare at him. This couldn't be happening. It was Brian she wanted. "Brian, he's nineteen. I don't think he knows what he wants." In her nervousness and Brian's revelation, she started to laugh.

Brian grinned back at her, relieved at her reaction. He laughed with her for a moment, and then said, "You can't blame him. Here we are, on the road with a beautiful woman . . . who wouldn't be in love with you?!" When Jennifer stopped laughing and just smiled at him, Brian thought he might have revealed too much. He quickly tried to cover his tracks. "I mean . . . you know, it's not often we're on tour with a beautiful woman and we're never in one place long enough to have a relationship. You're pretty accessible." Jennifer smiled at his discomfort.

"Brian, I understand what you're trying to say." Her heart sank as she realized he was trying to tell her that he wasn't interested in her like Nick was, and that's the one thing she wanted more than anything! She turned to look out the window again, fighting back the tears she felt burning in her eyes. She couldn't let him know how disappointed she was in his revelation.

He watched the back of her head for a moment, frustrated at his timidity once again when it came to her. All he wanted to do was forget how Nick felt about her, take her in his arms, and show her how he felt about her. His eyes traveled slowly down her profile, silently taking in her beauty.

Jennifer looked back at him. "So, what should I do?" she asked, wondering what he would say.

"I don't know," he said, wondering if she wanted to do something about it. "I guess it all depends on how you feel about him."

Jennifer wasn't ready to deal with all of this. Just when she thought that heartaches were behind her, here was another one to deal with. Brian was everything she wanted in a guy . . . and yet, here he sat practically pushing her towards a friend of his. "I don't know how I feel," she said, not wanting him to know how she felt about him. She didn't care about Nick. He was like a brother to her. But with Brian . . . She turned her head once more, looking out into the night. Why was this happening to her again?

Brian looked over at her. He could feel his heart splitting right down the middle. Was she interested in Nick? Had the video shoot and now all of Nick's attentions done it? He shook his head at his own timidity. It could have been him if he had pursued it, if he had pursued her. "Well, if you care for him, you should let him know."

She turned back to him, tears shining in her eyes and he was surprised. "So, you believe that if you care about someone, you should tell them?" she asked.

"Yeah," he replied. "It's the only way that you can make things work out . . . if they know."

Jennifer turned back towards the window, her greatest fears now realized. If that's how he thought, then he would've said something to her by now. It was obvious from his words that he didn't care about her. She had imagined it all. Nick was the one who wanted her and it hurt . . . god, it hurt! She fought back the tears and she felt his hand on her shoulder.

"Are you okay?" he asked, suddenly wondering what he had said. Had he made a mistake?

"Yeah," she said, not turning back to face him as the tears ran down her face. "You're right. I should tell him." 

Brian got up from the seat, now knowing the truth. She felt the same way about Nick and he felt sick. "Well, thanks for helping me out tonight . . . you know, relaxing and all." When she didn't turn back towards him, he added, "I think you and Nick make a cute couple."

He was surprised when she looked back up him. It was obvious that she had been crying. "Thanks Brian." They both stared at each other for a long minute as each of them wondered where they had gone wrong, what they hadn't done . . . neither knowing how much it was killing the other person. 

Brian managed to smile at her one last time before he went back down the hall towards his bunk and the beginning of a number of sleepless nights to come.

The next evening, they stopped for a couple of day's rest at a nice hotel somewhere outside of Raleigh, North Carolina. Riding on the tour bus was long and hard and Jennifer was especially spent after her conversation the previous night with Brian. All day, they had gone out of their way to not be near each other and it had been hard, both physically and emotionally. She had spent more time with Nick and now, looking back, she wondered if it was because she was turning towards him or if it had been to spite Brian, to lash out at the hurt he had inadvertently inflicted upon her.

She had gone straight to her room that she was sharing with Fatima and jumped into a hot bubble bath, hoping it would relieve some of the stress she had felt the past twenty-four hours. Just as she stepped out of the tub, she heard a knock on the door. Now what? She hoped it wasn't Nick. "Who is it?" she called, hoping it was just Fatima. It was.

"It's me, Jen. Can I come in?"

"Yeah," she called, wrapping a towel around herself. "Hi!" she said, looking up as Fatima walked into the spacious bathroom. She began to towel dry her hair with another towel. "What's up?"

"Nick just dropped by."

"He did?" she asked, her eyebrows lifting in surprise. "What did he want?"

"Well," she began, leaning against the wall as she eyed her friend. "He said he just wanted to talk to you."

"You sound like you don't believe him" she said, crossing over to the dressing table and sat down on the stool that was there. She lightly rubbed moisturizer over her face.

"Well, I think he wanted to do more than talk," she said, her look saying more than her words.

"What do you mean?" Jennifer asked again, shaking out her damp hair and running a comb through it.

"Well, I think it's pretty obvious he's fallen in love with you."

"Oh, Fatima," she exclaimed, looking at her reflection in the mirror. How had she gotten herself into this? "You're imagining things."

"I am not," she said, shaking her head. "You didn't see his face when I told him you had turned in for the night. That boy was disappointed and I mean, bad!"

Jennifer turned back around to face her. "You know, you're not the first one to say something about that to me."

"Is that right?" she replied, coming over to sit on the counter closer to Jennifer. "Who?"

Jennifer cleared her throat and replied, as offhandedly as she could, "Brian."

"Brian!" Naomi couldn't believe her ears. "Why honey, he's in love with you as well!"

"He is not," she said, turning back around and grabbed her body lotion. She took a deep breath, wishing that what Fatima had said was true! "Trust me, that's the furthermost thing from his mind."

Fatima turned, catching Jennifer's gaze in the mirror. "Yes, he is," she said again. "Everyone knows it. And I think that if you would be honest with yourself, you'd admit that you feel the same way about him."

Jennifer couldn't help but smile at her through the mirror. "Well . . ." she began.

"You do!" Fatima exclaimed. "I knew it!!" Jennifer laughed with her for a few moments.

"You know, when I first came, I thought it would be Kevin that I would be attracted to. He's tall, dark, handsome . . . but there's something about Brian." She stopped, lightly rubbing the body lotion into her arms and chest and then said, "He's funny, warm, caring. He makes me laugh so hard I can hardly breathe. And when he smiles . . ." she trailed off, tears springing into her eyes. God, it hurt so much to think about it.

"Girl, you've got it bad!" Fatima said, laughing.

"I know!" she admitted, trying to get a hold of herself. "What am I going to do?"

"What do you mean? You're going to go for it! What else would you do?"

"I can't do that," she said, her forehead wrinkling.

"Why not?"

"Because . . ." She stopped for a moment, wondering how to explain it. Something wouldn't let her tell Fatima that he had rejected her . . . just like Ty had. "We work together. It's not professional."

"Bullshit!" Fatima interjected. "That's a pitiful excuse."

"It's not an excuse, it's the truth," she said, trying to defend herself. "Besides, it's not fair to the other guys. I mean, look at Nick."

"Oh, you can't think about crap like that," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "What you want . . . you and Brian . . . that's the only thing that matters."

"It's more complicated than that," she said, standing up and running the comb through her hair once more, shaking off the notion of telling Fatima everything that had happened on the bus.

"You're the only one making it complicated."

"That may be true, but that's how I feel." She crossed over to where her clothes were, dropped the towel and slipped on her underwear and the nightshirt she always slept in. She wanted to say that it was Brian that had ended any hopes she had had of them getting together. 

"Jen, what about how you feel? What about Brian?" Suddenly, Jennifer was in tears and Fatima was at her side. "What? What?!"

"Oh Fatima . . ." she cried, tears rolling down her face unchecked.

Fatima was immediately at her side, gently touching her shoulder and then smoothing the damp blond hair. Jennifer looked up after a few moments, her eyes filled with tears as Fatima took hold of her arm and led her into the adjoining bedroom, setting her on the edge of the bed. It was a full ten minutes before she could speak. Fatima said nothing. She only sat there and rubbed her back gently and waited. 

Jennifer looked at her then. "I blew it, Fatima. I really did. Brian doesn't care for me. And I love him . . ." She couldn't go on then, and Fatima nodded slowly. She was beginning to get the picture.

"What happened, Jen?"

"Oh, god, I don't know. I thought everything was going to well. Just when I thought he felt the same about me, he . . ." She stopped for a moment, fighting back the urge to cry again. "He's not interested. He's not. He told me so last night."

"He came right out and told you that?" Fatima was astounded. He had given everyone the impression that he was hopelessly head over heels for the beautiful girl sitting before her.

"No, not in so many words . . ." she said. "But he said that Nick and I belong together . . . that we make a cute couple." She began to weep again, her head in her hands.

"Oh darling," Fatima cooed. "No, no . . . you're taking it wrong. He loves you, baby. He just doesn't know how to show it. He's so old-fashioned it hurts."

"No, I don't think so Fatima. You didn't see him."

"Jen, I'm pretty sure about it," she said, continuing to rub her friend's back. "Don't give up on ole' B-Rok yet." As Jennifer sat on the bed, doubting every word her friend said, she wanted desperately to believe . . .

The next afternoon, a big group of them were out relaxing by the pool. It was a gorgeous day and they finally had some free time this afternoon before the show this evening. Fatima and Jennifer lay on lounges, soaking up the sun while they could. Jennifer wore a two-piece black bikini and Dior sunglasses. Her long hair was twisted up and held in place with a comb. The guys were in the pool and had been playing a game of water volleyball with William, one of the costume designers.

Jennifer sat up, stretched and then changed positions. She turned over onto her stomach, but his time with her head facing the pool. The game was breaking up and she watched them all for a moment, her gaze shielded by the dark glasses she wore. She couldn't help but notice how gorgeous each one of the band members were: muscles rippling, stomachs hard, hair dripping. But even as they all were attractive, it was Brian she kept watching, her mind flying back to the conversation she had had with him on the bus just two nights ago.

Even as she watched him, he was laughing at something Nick had done and she couldn't help but smile along with him. He shook his head, water spraying from his short hair and then sticking straight up from the agitation. It didn't help that Nick kept reaching over and twisting the spiked ends to make it stick up even more, resulting in a wrestling match and dunking contest between the two of them. Jennifer turned back over onto her back, closing her eyes as she reveled in the feel of the hot sun on her skin. It wasn't often that they had a chance to rest and relax. She had work she could be doing, but had chosen to spend some time with the group. Besides, she wanted all the extra time she could to be near Brian, even though she knew he didn't feel the same way about her.




Love's Harmony Ch. 07



The next thing she knew, she was being picked up off the lounge. As she felt herself rise and strong arms under her, her eyes flew open as a startled shriek escaped from her lips. Her surprised gaze fell on Brian's laughing face as he lifted her out of the lounge. "Time for a swim, sweetheart!"

"Brian ... no! Put me down!" she said, kicking her legs as her arms went around his neck. Their eyes locked at the simple touch, hers startled at the look he suddenly gave her . . . unleashed passion burning there. He stopped at the pool's edge, simply holding her in his arms. She watched him for a long moment, her body suddenly on fire where it pressed against his.

"Throw her in, Brian!" came the call, suddenly breaking the spell they had both been under.

"Brian!" she wailed once more, her legs kicking again. "Put me down!"

"Okay," he said, suddenly releasing her. A startled scream resounded as she fell, bottom first into the cold water. She came out from under the surface sputtering, her hair streaming into her face.

"Brian! I swear!" She could hear laughter as she went under once more, throwing her head back and running her hand down the back of her hair to get it out of her eyes. When she came back up, Brian wasn't standing on the edge anymore. He was in the process of jumping over her, a huge splash drenching her once more. "Now, you're mine!" she swore, laughing as she jumped on top of him, holding his head under the water.

Suddenly, the water erupted as the rest of the band jumped back into the water: A.J., Howie, and Kevin. Nick had already reached them, pulling her off the top of Brian as he came out from under her, sputtering for breath. She pushed away from Nick, laughing as she kicked clear from the oncoming group and swam for the opposite side. Just as she thought she had made it clear, she felt strong hands on her ankle, pulling her back into the group. She looked over her shoulder, seeing Brian's hand on her leg. "Oh, no you don't," he said, pulling her towards them. She laughed, kicking at him as her arms pumped harder to swim away.

Just as she got loose, Kevin reached out for shoulder, missed and grabbed the string tie to the top of her suit instead. As she swam out of their reach, it suddenly gave way and stayed in Kevin's hand. At their uproar, she turned to see him holding it triumphantly over his head. Her mouth fell open as her arms instinctively crossed over her chest. The guys were either laughing or whopping loudly and she feel her face turn red at the embarrassment of the situation. She looked over to where Fatima had been, but she had already gone in. She could hear Kevin saying, "Look what I've got!" And then, "It was an accident, I swear!" and then he burst into laughter.

"Guys," she said, taking a step towards them and then, remembering her situation, stepped back again. "Guys," she pleaded. "Give me back my top!"

By now, they were passing it around between them and she couldn't help but laugh with them. "Guys . . ." But they weren't listening and she knew she wasn't in the position to bargain with them. 

"What'll you give us if we help you out?" Nick teased her, coming closer to where she stood. 

She tightened her hold around her chest, staring at him as he approached. "Nick," she called. "That's close enough!" She laughed and then said, "Nick, please help me out. Give me my top."

He shrugged his shoulders at her, saying, "I don't have it."

"Go get it," she pleaded. "Please . . ."

"Now, why would he do that?" Howie said, coming over to lean his arm against Nick's shoulder. "For once, we have you right where we want you." They both laughed for a moment as she looked at them, trying to muster the best evil look she could. All it succeeded in doing was make them laugh even more.

"Okay, that's enough," she called over their shoulders to where Kevin stood with A.J. Brian had gotten out of the pool and stood drying off with his towel. "Guys, I have work to do."

"Bullshit!" A.J. called back. "You've been out here goofing off with us. Now, all of a sudden, you have work to do." He laughed, grabbed the top from Kevin and swam for the steps. He sat on the second step, twirling her bikini top around one of his fingers, taunting her. "Come and get it," he challenged her, knowing full well that she wouldn't. 

She quickly looked around at the guys, knowing they weren't going to give in and no one was here to help her. Refusing to stay trapped in the pool all afternoon, she crossed over to the closest side of the pool, dropped her hands from her breasts, hauled herself out of the pool and turned to face them. All of their mouths dropped open, none of them able to say anything as they gawked at her. She strode over to where A.J. sat, grabbed the top out of his hand and gave his head a small push. "Jerk," she muttered, grabbing her towel as she passed by where she had left it.

Wrapping the towel around her chest, she turned once more to where they still stood in the pool, she said, "You guys need to get a life." As she strode past where Brian stood, she gave him one good shove, sending him flying into the pool along with his towel. She laughed whole-heartedly as she left the pool area, still recalling the shocked looks on their faces, especially Brian's. It had done her heart some good when she had shoved him into the pool. She wanted him to feel some of her frustration.

Suddenly A.J. was there beside her. "Jen, I'm sorry. We shouldn't have done that. I apologize." She stopped suddenly, looking back at the pool where he had left his friends. Kevin, Howie and Nick were horsing around again, but she could see Brian standing in the shallow end, watching them as he wrung out his now soaked towel.

"You should be," she said, looking back at A.J. Nick burst out of the pool and ran up to them. 

He grabbed her into his embrace and swung her around in a circle before putting her down again. "Hey, you're not pissed are you?" he said, smiling down at her. His eyes bore into hers and she smiled back at him.

"Yeah, as a matter of fact I am," she told him. "You guys act like a bunch of high school kids . . ." She stopped for a minute, feigning innocence as she added, "Oh that's right . . . you just were a high school kid."

He shook his head and laughed. A.J. watched the two of them bickering back and forth and suddenly felt left out in the cold. Where he had wanted to talk to Jennifer and apologize, the moment had been snatched out of his hand quickly and he wasn't sure how that made him feel. He placed his sunglasses back on before turning back to pool, throwing one last look behind him at Nick holding Jennifer close.

"I can't believe you said that!" he said, tickling her through the towel that was still wrapped around her chest. 

"Well, it's the truth!" she argued, laughing as she tried to twist away from him. She noticed that Brian was still standing in the shallow end of the pool, his eyes watching them and then suddenly she leaned in towards Nick, kissing him lightly on the lips. Where she had just wanted to show Brian that two could play at the game she felt he was playing with her, suddenly became more real. Nick quickly took her in his arms, and she stood, encircled by his warmth, feeling his desire for her as he held her close and they kissed. She was breathless when they stopped and she stepped away from him, her eyes flying back to the pool where Brian turned away from them then, his eyes hidden from her gaze.

"Jen . . ." Nick began, his eyes searching hers. 

She turned towards him again, wondering if this is where she belonged. Maybe she had been wrong about Brian. But how could that be? "I'm sorry Nick," she said. "I shouldn't have done that."

"Yes, you should've," he said, stroking her arms gently. "I should've done it a long time ago."

"Nick," she said. "I have to be honest with you. I . . ."

He cut her off quickly. "I don't want you to say anything right now," he said, placing a finger on her lips. "I just want you to know that I'm here and that I care about you." He stopped for a moment, searching her eyes. "I really do."

She just looked at him a moment, desperately wishing that it was Brian, not Nick, standing here saying these things to her. "I know," she said, turning away from him as she headed back to her room. She turned back to face him once more, "I don't want to hurt you Nick."

"You won't," he said, watching her walk away. He turned back towards the pool, seeing Brian's eyes on him and he knew it wouldn't be long before they had to talk about it. And he wasn't sure he wanted to confront his best friend about it . . . not sure at all. What he didn't know is that A.J. was watching them as well.



Love's Harmony Ch. 08



On Wednesday afternoon of that same week, Greg took Jennifer to a local Laundromat so she could get some laundry done. She had volunteered to do the guys laundry as well since they were doing an interview at the local radio station that was sponsoring their concert this evening. Greg was one of the van drivers that took them around town to get things done. He had dropped the guys off earlier and then came back to get Jennifer. When they arrived, she said she'd probably be a couple of hours and told him to do what he needed to do and come back for her later. The guys were supposed to be done in the next thirty minutes, so he left to go pick them up and said he'd be back after that.

Jennifer was alone at the Laundromat and was glad to finally have some time to herself. She had divided all the clothes into bags of who they belonged to and had even marked initials on the tags so she wouldn't get confused. Doing small things like this made her feel normal . . . being on the road was starting to get on her nerves and she wasn't sure she could handle the pressure for much longer. It wasn't just the job, it was also Nick and Brian.

Nick was pursuing her with gusto and she was starting to give in. She wasn't sure if it was out of spite or loneliness, or if it was just the fact that Brian had rejected her. All she knew was that Nick gave her attention, cared about her, made her feel important while Brian had drifted further and further away. Unlike what had happened with her fiancée', Ty, she could see Brian pulling away ... she could feel her heart ripping in two for the second time this year and she wasn't sure she could survive it a second time.

As she began a load of laundry into six different machines, she sighed heavily. Her mind flew back over the past two, almost three months, wondering what she had done to push Brian away. She knew she had been careful about starting a relationship with one of the band members because of her professionalism, but now she didn't care - she just wanted to be with him. She didn't care what anyone would think! But then she chastised herself, knowing full well that she did care. It meant a great deal to her to keep her professionalism on this first assignment as a band promoter. If she did a good job here, then there would be more assignments waiting when this tour was over. But she also toyed with the thought that she couldn't travel with BSB anymore after this one. It was too painful, especially now that she had fallen for Brian.

Once she had the laundry going, she sat back into one of the chairs and stared out the window. Just that morning, Nick had come to her and she had responded to his kisses. He was determined to win her over and she knew she was attracted to him but she wasn't sure why. She chewed on her thumbnail thoughtfully as she tried to sort out her feelings in her mind. Nick was gorgeous, about that she had no doubts! He was sweet, charming, and thoughtful. But as soon as she thought she had convinced herself that it was Nick that she was now attracted to, Brian would pop into her thoughts, clouding over every thought she had of Nick. It was Brian's face she would see when she would kiss Nick. It was Brian's arms that she longed for as Nick would hold her in his embrace. It was Brian she watched at the concerts, drawn in by the words of the song. She knew that she hadn't shaken this attraction that she had to Brian. It was if he had already bored himself into her soul. They were locked together and she couldn't shake it . . . she didn't want to shake it! She shook her head as she sat alone in the Laundromat, tears springing into her gorgeous blue eyes. She let her head fall back onto the back of the hard chair, a long sigh escaping between her lips.

"Are you okay?" Jennifer's startled gaze fell on Brian as her head quickly popped up from it's reclining position.

"Brian!" she exclaimed, sitting up straighter and wondering if he could read her thoughts. He noticed the way her eyes glowed as he watched her and he knew that if he didn't take her into his arms and kiss her the way he longed to, he would regret it forever. "What are you doing here?"

"Jen," he began, reaching down to take her hand in his. He pulled her to her feet and stood, wondering if he should just draw her in to him and kiss her until all thoughts of Nick were driven from her mind. Jennifer stood close to him and just being this near to him took her breath away. She could feel her breath quicken as she longed to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him. "Jen, I . . . " he stammered. "I . . . thought you might need some help," he finally said, turning towards the whirring machines.

Jennifer's eyes closed at his rejection once more. She opened them to find his eyes on her, speaking to her ... or were they? He confused her more than anyone she had ever known. She pulled her hand from his and walked past him towards the machines. "That's sweet of you," she said, hoping her disappointment didn't show. "The first load is almost done." And then turning back towards him, asked, "Where's the rest of the band?"

"There's a court outside," he answered, nodding towards the parking lot. "They're about to start a game of basketball."

"You love basketball," she said, pulling out a load of clothes and transferring them into a dryer. "You should go catch a game while you can."

Brian shook his head, beating himself up once more for not listening to his heart. She touched him like no other and all he could think about was her . . . not basketball, not the band, not even singing. "Are you sure you don't need any help?" he offered once more.

"I'm sure," she said, smiling at him. All she wanted now was for him to leave. Being this near him, feeling this way and not having it returned was slowly killing her. Brian couldn't have tortured her better any other way. "You go on."

"Okay," he said, heading for the door. With one hand on the door and a foot out the door, he turned once more towards her. "Jen . . .?"

"Yes?" she answered, hopeful once more that he would say what she could see in his eyes. They stared at each other as each tried to figure out what was going on with the other person.

"Nothing," he said, shaking his head once more at his valor. He had to settle things with Nick first before he approached Jennifer again.

Jennifer watched him leave the Laundromat and tried not to let the tears that she could feel welling up streak down her face. She loved him so much but then at the same time, she hated him! Just when she thought he was going to do something, he never did and Jennifer was frustrated beyond reason. When would this end? She feared it would continue this way throughout the rest of the tour and they still had a while to go.

As she folded some of the clean clothes, she came across Brian's favorite shirt from his home state university. There was hardly a day that went by where he wasn't wearing it and Jennifer held it up to her face, inhaling the scent. Even clean, it still smelled of Brian and she clung onto it like she would never let go.

"Nick, I have to talk to you," Brian called as he walked up to his friend outside of the Laundromat. The first game was starting to break up and Brian wanted to talk to Nick about Jennifer before he lost his nerve.

"Yeah, okay," he replied, passing the ball back to A.J. "I'm taking a break," he called.

"Yeah okay. B-Rok, man!! Come on and shoot some hoops!" Howie called back.

"In a sec," Brian said. A.J. nodded as Nick joined Brian as he walked back over to the van.

"What's up?" he said, as he walked along beside Brian. At his serious look, Nick said, "You look like it's pretty serious." When Brian just looked at him, he said, "Why? What's wrong?"

"Well," he began, searching for the right words. He wasn't quite sure how to word what he wanted to say and to be quite honest, he wasn't sure what it was exactly he wanted to say.

"So . . .?" Nick prompted as they reached the van.

Brian looked up to see the van in front of them. "Hold up a sec," he said, wondering still how to bring up this subject. He knew it was going to be difficult.

"Okay," Nick replied, leaning against the side of the van. "So, what's so serious?"

"It's Jennifer," he said, looking up at Nick. At his worried look he said, "No, she's okay. I just need to know what's going on between you two."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's obvious that you're attracted to her," he said, hoping Nick would jumpstart off of that.

"Yeah, well . . ." he said, a wide grin splitting his face. "Is it that obvious?"

"Yeah," he said, wondering how he was going to explain that he too was attracted to her. "So, does the shoe fit the other foot? Is she attracted to you?"

Nick shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know." He dragged his shoe through the dirt for a moment and then looked at his friend. "When we did the video shoot in L.A., I thought so. I know there were some sparks between us when we kissed, but ever since then . . . I don't know. Why?"

Brian took a deep breath and looked up at Nick. "Well, I think you should know that I ... " He stopped to clear his throat and then said, "I don't want to step on your toes or anything, but ... you should know ..."

"That you're in love with her," Nick finished for him. At Brian's incredulous look, he added, "I know. Everyone knows."

"What?! I'm not in love . . ."

"Bullshit!" he retorted. "That's your problem. You sit there and do nothing while she watches you, waiting for you to do something."

"She does not," he argued, wondering where this was coming from. Jennifer was not interested in him ... at least, not that he was aware of.

"See? That's what I'm talking about! She's been following you around ever since the tour started with those gorgeous blue eyes of hers and you haven't even noticed! I've gotten sick of watching it. If you're not going to do anything about it, then I will!"

Brian was dumbstruck as he stared at his younger friend. "I didn't know ... I don't know."

"Get with it man!" Nick said, his voice rising slightly in agitation. "She's done everything but hit you over the head with the bus sink. If you aren't going to do ..."

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"How about treat her like she's the beautiful woman she is instead of a member of the band? She's not one of us. She is a beautiful, single woman who's crazy about you!"

"You don't know that," Nick argued, starting to wonder if he had really missed all of what Nick was saying. "Has she told you something point blank?"

"She doesn't have to," he insisted, grabbing onto his friend's arm. "It's clearly written all over her face. Howie knows, Kevin knows ... even A.J. can see it." Brian just shook his head. "Look," Nick said, stepping away from the bus. "Ever since the video shoot, I tried to make a move on her, but she keeps backing off." He looked over at his friend and then said, "She's tried to let me know where she and I stood. Not that I haven't tried to talk her out of it ... I have, trust me. But it's not me she wants ... it's you."

Brian stared at his friend for a moment, finding his revelations overwhelming. "Every time I try to get near her, she backs off," he tried to explain. "Just when I think she's interested, she does something to convince me she's not."

"It's her defense mechanism jumping in," Nick said, wondering what was possessing him to do this. It would be in his best interest to drop it and convince Jennifer to be with him instead. But he found himself being the liaison between these two. "She's hung up on this 'It wouldn't be fair to the rest of the band' thing. You know, we all work together, travel together ... whatever. And she's probably still afraid to get involved with anyone after what happened to her with that wedding. Who can blame her." He turned suddenly to face Brian. "But I'm telling you ... you'd be a fool to let her slip through your fingers."

"How did you get to be so smart?" he asked, suddenly smiling up at his best friend. "I'm supposed to be giving you the advice on girls, not the other way around."

"I may be younger," Nick said, smiling at him, "But I'm no fool when it comes to knowing women. Jennifer is all woman and if you'd open your eyes long enough, you'd see everything I'm telling you now."

Later that afternoon, Jennifer was doing the dishes in the bus when Nick came in. "Hi," he said, coming up behind her, his arms snaking around her waist.

She smiled at him and then turned suddenly. "Nick, I need to talk to you."

"I know," he admitted, stepping away from her.

"What do you mean 'you know'? I haven't even said anything yet?"

"You don't have to," Nick said, grinning over at her.

She gave him a level look and then turned back to the dishes. "Okay, what am I going to say?" she asked, opening the cupboard above her head. She reached out to put a dish up into it but it was just beyond her reach. Nick stood behind her, took the dish from her and stretched upward with her to assist her in putting the dish where it belong. His other arm was around her waist, helping to steady her as she stood on her toes. 

At that moment, Brian walked into the bus quietly and saw them together. He felt his heart rip open just a little more as he saw Nick holding her the way he longed to daily. It was obvious his friend had been serious when he told him he was going to do something about it. As he turned to leave, he heard Nick answer her question. "You're going to tell me that you're in love with B-Rok and that I'm too young for you."

Jennifer stopped in midair, disbelief in what she had heard coming out of Nick's mouth. Her heartbeat quickened as she said, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't deny it, Jen," he said, laughing. "We all know."

"What do you mean 'we'?" she asked, looking back over her shoulder at him. He stepped around to the side of her and picked up the cup towel that sat on the counter.

"Everyone but Brian," he answered, shrugging his shoulders. "You two have worked so hard trying to fight it. It's obvious to the rest of us."

Jennifer stood for a few minutes staring at Nick and then gently shoving him back, said, "If you knew that's how I felt, then why haven't you said anything?" she asked. 

"I don't know," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "I guess I was hoping I was wrong ... that maybe we could get together." He looked over at her once more and then smiled, "But now I know that you and I aren't going to get anything going. You and B-Rok belong together and it's time you both admitted it."

"Is that right?" she asked, smiling at him and then turning at the sound of the door closing. Capturing Brian's gaze in hers, she quickly took in her breath. "Brian!" Nick turned at her words, a grin breaking out on his face.

"Hi," Brian answered, a sheepish grin crossing his face, his eyes glancing over to Nick. "Nick ..."

"Hey man," he answered, folding the cup towel and placing it on the cabinet top. Quickly turning to Jennifer and kissing her cheek, he joked, "Now, you two have fun." Jennifer shot him a look of complete shock, knowing Brian had heard everything they had said. Nick brushed past Brian on his way out, slapping his friend on the shoulder, laughing at their predicament. Brian turned and watched the door close behind him, now alone in the bus with Jennifer.

He turned towards her, a serious look on his face. She watched him for a moment and then turned back to her job, her hands now shaking with nervousness. He came over to stand beside her, taking the cup towel in his hand. "Here," he said, reaching over to take the dish from her hand. "Let me help."

"Thanks," she managed to get out, her tongue reaching out to wet her now, dry lips. She wondered how she was going to face him now. He had to have heard her conversation with Nick and it was painfully obvious that he now knew how she felt about him. Her hands trembled as she reached back into the sink for another dish. They worked quietly beside each other for a few minutes, neither knowing what to say.

Jennifer finally worked up enough courage to glance over at him, finding his eyes on her. She smiled at him, looking back down at her work. "I guess I caught you guys at a bad time," he offered, letting a small chuckle escape his lips.

Jennifer couldn't help but smile at his words. "I don't know if I'd call it a bad time, just . . ." she searched for the right word, and then looking over at him, "awkward." He smiled at her, folding the cup towel and placing it down.

Turning to face her, he added, "I'm glad I walked in though."

"Why's that?" she asked, feigning ignorance. She could feel her heart racing and wondered if he could hear it from where he stood. 

"I would've never known."

"Known what?" she barely whispered.

"You haven't been completely honest with me." Jennifer looked up, startled at his accusation. 

"I've always been honest with you, Brian. Right from the start," she defended herself, wondering where he was going with this.

"You didn't tell me how you really felt about me," he pointed out. She turned back to her work, but he took her by the hand and turned her towards him. "Why?"

She searched his eyes for a moment, not sure how to answer. She didn't want to confess her true feelings and not have them returned. She desperately hoped Nick had been right . . . that he felt the same way. "According to Nick," she answered softly, "I could ask you the same question." He smiled at her words, knowing she was right.

"You could," he grinned at her. "Right after you answer my question."

Her eyes dropped to his hand holding hers, his fingers lightly massaging hers. She smiled and said, "To tell you the truth, in the beginning I just didn't want my feelings to get in the way of my job and your career." She looked up at him, holding his eyes with hers. "And then ..." She stopped, her eyes dropping again. "And then ... I didn't think there would be any way that you'd ever feel that way about me."

Brian stared at her for a moment, wondering what he had done to make her think that he wouldn't be interested in her. It had taken everything he had had not to pull her into his arms every time they had been together. He felt closer to her than anyone ... even the guys in the band. As his left hand continued to hold hers, his right hand gently cupped her chin, lifting her eyes to meet his. He was stunned at the tears that now filled her luminous blue eyes. He shook his head in amazement. It was suddenly obvious that they had felt the same way about each other since the beginning and he couldn't find the words to voice his feelings. All he could do was stare at her, lost in her eyes. 

He leaned into her, his lips gently brushing hers. Jennifer's eyes closed, a small sigh escaping her lips as they parted beneath his. Drawing her into his embrace, Brian's arms went around her, pulling her closer to him. Jennifer's hands clutched at the sides of his shirt, not knowing where to go; but as she leaned into him, they traveled slowly up his back, reveling in the feel of him finally in her arms. As his lips continued to brush across hers slowly, seductively, Jennifer felt her legs turn to jelly; unsure she could support herself anymore. Just when she thought she would drop, Brian pulled back slowly, staring into her eyes silently. He smiled at her and then drew her back into his embrace, his mouth next to her ear.

"I can't believe this, not after all this time," he confessed quietly, his lips nibbling on her earlobe. She smiled at his words, her eyes shutting in her attempt to hold onto this moment.

"Me either," she admitted. "I didn't think you felt the same about me."

He drew back again, keeping her close to him but where he could look into her face. "I'm surprised you didn't see it before now," he said. "I had a hard time keeping my hands off of you."




Love's Harmony Ch. 08



"Why didn't you say something?" she asked, incredulous at his words.

He shook his head in amazement this time. "I don't know ..." he said, stroking her long hair with one hand, his other one around her waist. "I guess for the same reasons you didn't. I didn't think you returned my feelings."

Jennifer laughed gently. He drew her into his embrace again, kissing her cheek, nose, eyes. "Oh, Brian ..." She drew him closer still, her arms encircling his neck, her lips searching desperately for his, afraid now to let him go ... afraid of losing this moment forever! But what scared her the most was the predicament they were now in. She worked for the band and Brian was the band. It was unprofessional and she knew they couldn't have a relationship, as much as she wanted it. But for now, she just clung onto him, her lips molded to his. On Wednesday afternoon of that same week, Greg took Jennifer to a local Laundromat so she could get some laundry done. She had volunteered to do the guys laundry as well since they were doing an interview at the local radio station that was sponsoring their concert this evening. Greg was one of the van drivers that took them around town to get things done. He had dropped the guys off earlier and then came back to get Jennifer. When they arrived, she said she'd probably be a couple of hours and told him to do what he needed to do and come back for her later. The guys were supposed to be done in the next thirty minutes, so he left to go pick them up and said he'd be back after that.

Jennifer was alone at the Laundromat and was glad to finally have some time to herself. She had divided all the clothes into bags of who they belonged to and had even marked initials on the tags so she wouldn't get confused. Doing small things like this made her feel normal . . . being on the road was starting to get on her nerves and she wasn't sure she could handle the pressure for much longer. It wasn't just the job, it was also Nick and Brian.

Nick was pursuing her with gusto and she was starting to give in. She wasn't sure if it was out of spite or loneliness, or if it was just the fact that Brian had rejected her. All she knew was that Nick gave her attention, cared about her, made her feel important while Brian had drifted further and further away. Unlike what had happened with her fiancée', Ty, she could see Brian pulling away ... she could feel her heart ripping in two for the second time this year and she wasn't sure she could survive it a second time.

As she began a load of laundry into six different machines, she sighed heavily. Her mind flew back over the past two, almost three months, wondering what she had done to push Brian away. She knew she had been careful about starting a relationship with one of the band members because of her professionalism, but now she didn't care - she just wanted to be with him. She didn't care what anyone would think! But then she chastised herself, knowing full well that she did care. It meant a great deal to her to keep her professionalism on this first assignment as a band promoter. If she did a good job here, then there would be more assignments waiting when this tour was over. But she also toyed with the thought that she couldn't travel with BSB anymore after this one. It was too painful, especially now that she had fallen for Brian.

Once she had the laundry going, she sat back into one of the chairs and stared out the window. Just that morning, Nick had come to her and she had responded to his kisses. He was determined to win her over and she knew she was attracted to him but she wasn't sure why. She chewed on her thumbnail thoughtfully as she tried to sort out her feelings in her mind. Nick was gorgeous, about that she had no doubts! He was sweet, charming, and thoughtful. But as soon as she thought she had convinced herself that it was Nick that she was now attracted to, Brian would pop into her thoughts, clouding over every thought she had of Nick. It was Brian's face she would see when she would kiss Nick. It was Brian's arms that she longed for as Nick would hold her in his embrace. It was Brian she watched at the concerts, drawn in by the words of the song. She knew that she hadn't shaken this attraction that she had to Brian. It was if he had already bored himself into her soul. They were locked together and she couldn't shake it . . . she didn't want to shake it! She shook her head as she sat alone in the Laundromat, tears springing into her gorgeous blue eyes. She let her head fall back onto the back of the hard chair, a long sigh escaping between her lips.

"Are you okay?" Jennifer's startled gaze fell on Brian as her head quickly popped up from it's reclining position.

"Brian!" she exclaimed, sitting up straighter and wondering if he could read her thoughts. He noticed the way her eyes glowed as he watched her and he knew that if he didn't take her into his arms and kiss her the way he longed to, he would regret it forever. "What are you doing here?"

"Jen," he began, reaching down to take her hand in his. He pulled her to her feet and stood, wondering if he should just draw her in to him and kiss her until all thoughts of Nick were driven from her mind. Jennifer stood close to him and just being this near to him took her breath away. She could feel her breath quicken as she longed to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him. "Jen, I . . . " he stammered. "I . . . thought you might need some help," he finally said, turning towards the whirring machines.

Jennifer's eyes closed at his rejection once more. She opened them to find his eyes on her, speaking to her ... or were they? He confused her more than anyone she had ever known. She pulled her hand from his and walked past him towards the machines. "That's sweet of you," she said, hoping her disappointment didn't show. "The first load is almost done." And then turning back towards him, asked, "Where's the rest of the band?"

"There's a court outside," he answered, nodding towards the parking lot. "They're about to start a game of basketball."

"You love basketball," she said, pulling out a load of clothes and transferring them into a dryer. "You should go catch a game while you can."

Brian shook his head, beating himself up once more for not listening to his heart. She touched him like no other and all he could think about was her . . . not basketball, not the band, not even singing. "Are you sure you don't need any help?" he offered once more.

"I'm sure," she said, smiling at him. All she wanted now was for him to leave. Being this near him, feeling this way and not having it returned was slowly killing her. Brian couldn't have tortured her better any other way. "You go on."

"Okay," he said, heading for the door. With one hand on the door and a foot out the door, he turned once more towards her. "Jen . . .?"

"Yes?" she answered, hopeful once more that he would say what she could see in his eyes. They stared at each other as each tried to figure out what was going on with the other person.

"Nothing," he said, shaking his head once more at his valor. He had to settle things with Nick first before he approached Jennifer again.

Jennifer watched him leave the Laundromat and tried not to let the tears that she could feel welling up streak down her face. She loved him so much but then at the same time, she hated him! Just when she thought he was going to do something, he never did and Jennifer was frustrated beyond reason. When would this end? She feared it would continue this way throughout the rest of the tour and they still had a while to go.

As she folded some of the clean clothes, she came across Brian's favorite shirt from his home state university. There was hardly a day that went by where he wasn't wearing it and Jennifer held it up to her face, inhaling the scent. Even clean, it still smelled of Brian and she clung onto it like she would never let go.

"Nick, I have to talk to you," Brian called as he walked up to his friend outside of the Laundromat. The first game was starting to break up and Brian wanted to talk to Nick about Jennifer before he lost his nerve.

"Yeah, okay," he replied, passing the ball back to A.J. "I'm taking a break," he called.

"Yeah okay. B-Rok, man!! Come on and shoot some hoops!" Howie called back.

"In a sec," Brian said. A.J. nodded as Nick joined Brian as he walked back over to the van.

"What's up?" he said, as he walked along beside Brian. At his serious look, Nick said, "You look like it's pretty serious." When Brian just looked at him, he said, "Why? What's wrong?"

"Well," he began, searching for the right words. He wasn't quite sure how to word what he wanted to say and to be quite honest, he wasn't sure what it was exactly he wanted to say.

"So . . .?" Nick prompted as they reached the van.

Brian looked up to see the van in front of them. "Hold up a sec," he said, wondering still how to bring up this subject. He knew it was going to be difficult.

"Okay," Nick replied, leaning against the side of the van. "So, what's so serious?"

"It's Jennifer," he said, looking up at Nick. At his worried look he said, "No, she's okay. I just need to know what's going on between you two."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's obvious that you're attracted to her," he said, hoping Nick would jumpstart off of that.

"Yeah, well . . ." he said, a wide grin splitting his face. "Is it that obvious?"

"Yeah," he said, wondering how he was going to explain that he too was attracted to her. "So, does the shoe fit the other foot? Is she attracted to you?"

Nick shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know." He dragged his shoe through the dirt for a moment and then looked at his friend. "When we did the video shoot in L.A., I thought so. I know there were some sparks between us when we kissed, but ever since then . . . I don't know. Why?"

Brian took a deep breath and looked up at Nick. "Well, I think you should know that I ... " He stopped to clear his throat and then said, "I don't want to step on your toes or anything, but ... you should know ..."

"That you're in love with her," Nick finished for him. At Brian's incredulous look, he added, "I know. Everyone knows."

"What?! I'm not in love . . ."

"Bullshit!" he retorted. "That's your problem. You sit there and do nothing while she watches you, waiting for you to do something."

"She does not," he argued, wondering where this was coming from. Jennifer was not interested in him ... at least, not that he was aware of.

"See? That's what I'm talking about! She's been following you around ever since the tour started with those gorgeous blue eyes of hers and you haven't even noticed! I've gotten sick of watching it. If you're not going to do anything about it, then I will!"

Brian was dumbstruck as he stared at his younger friend. "I didn't know ... I don't know."

"Get with it man!" Nick said, his voice rising slightly in agitation. "She's done everything but hit you over the head with the bus sink. If you aren't going to do ..."

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"How about treat her like she's the beautiful woman she is instead of a member of the band? She's not one of us. She is a beautiful, single woman who's crazy about you!"

"You don't know that," Nick argued, starting to wonder if he had really missed all of what Nick was saying. "Has she told you something point blank?"

"She doesn't have to," he insisted, grabbing onto his friend's arm. "It's clearly written all over her face. Howie knows, Kevin knows ... even A.J. can see it." Brian just shook his head. "Look," Nick said, stepping away from the bus. "Ever since the video shoot, I tried to make a move on her, but she keeps backing off." He looked over at his friend and then said, "She's tried to let me know where she and I stood. Not that I haven't tried to talk her out of it ... I have, trust me. But it's not me she wants ... it's you."

Brian stared at his friend for a moment, finding his revelations overwhelming. "Every time I try to get near her, she backs off," he tried to explain. "Just when I think she's interested, she does something to convince me she's not."

"It's her defense mechanism jumping in," Nick said, wondering what was possessing him to do this. It would be in his best interest to drop it and convince Jennifer to be with him instead. But he found himself being the liaison between these two. "She's hung up on this 'It wouldn't be fair to the rest of the band' thing. You know, we all work together, travel together ... whatever. And she's probably still afraid to get involved with anyone after what happened to her with that wedding. Who can blame her." He turned suddenly to face Brian. "But I'm telling you ... you'd be a fool to let her slip through your fingers."

"How did you get to be so smart?" he asked, suddenly smiling up at his best friend. "I'm supposed to be giving you the advice on girls, not the other way around."

"I may be younger," Nick said, smiling at him, "But I'm no fool when it comes to knowing women. Jennifer is all woman and if you'd open your eyes long enough, you'd see everything I'm telling you now."

Later that afternoon, Jennifer was doing the dishes in the bus when Nick came in. "Hi," he said, coming up behind her, his arms snaking around her waist.

She smiled at him and then turned suddenly. "Nick, I need to talk to you."

"I know," he admitted, stepping away from her.

"What do you mean 'you know'? I haven't even said anything yet?"

"You don't have to," Nick said, grinning over at her.

She gave him a level look and then turned back to the dishes. "Okay, what am I going to say?" she asked, opening the cupboard above her head. She reached out to put a dish up into it but it was just beyond her reach. Nick stood behind her, took the dish from her and stretched upward with her to assist her in putting the dish where it belong. His other arm was around her waist, helping to steady her as she stood on her toes. 

At that moment, Brian walked into the bus quietly and saw them together. He felt his heart rip open just a little more as he saw Nick holding her the way he longed to daily. It was obvious his friend had been serious when he told him he was going to do something about it. As he turned to leave, he heard Nick answer her question. "You're going to tell me that you're in love with B-Rok and that I'm too young for you."

Jennifer stopped in midair, disbelief in what she had heard coming out of Nick's mouth. Her heartbeat quickened as she said, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't deny it, Jen," he said, laughing. "We all know."

"What do you mean 'we'?" she asked, looking back over her shoulder at him. He stepped around to the side of her and picked up the cup towel that sat on the counter.

"Everyone but Brian," he answered, shrugging his shoulders. "You two have worked so hard trying to fight it. It's obvious to the rest of us."

Jennifer stood for a few minutes staring at Nick and then gently shoving him back, said, "If you knew that's how I felt, then why haven't you said anything?" she asked. 

"I don't know," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "I guess I was hoping I was wrong ... that maybe we could get together." He looked over at her once more and then smiled, "But now I know that you and I aren't going to get anything going. You and B-Rok belong together and it's time you both admitted it."

"Is that right?" she asked, smiling at him and then turning at the sound of the door closing. Capturing Brian's gaze in hers, she quickly took in her breath. "Brian!" Nick turned at her words, a grin breaking out on his face.

"Hi," Brian answered, a sheepish grin crossing his face, his eyes glancing over to Nick. "Nick ..."

"Hey man," he answered, folding the cup towel and placing it on the cabinet top. Quickly turning to Jennifer and kissing her cheek, he joked, "Now, you two have fun." Jennifer shot him a look of complete shock, knowing Brian had heard everything they had said. Nick brushed past Brian on his way out, slapping his friend on the shoulder, laughing at their predicament. Brian turned and watched the door close behind him, now alone in the bus with Jennifer.

He turned towards her, a serious look on his face. She watched him for a moment and then turned back to her job, her hands now shaking with nervousness. He came over to stand beside her, taking the cup towel in his hand. "Here," he said, reaching over to take the dish from her hand. "Let me help."

"Thanks," she managed to get out, her tongue reaching out to wet her now, dry lips. She wondered how she was going to face him now. He had to have heard her conversation with Nick and it was painfully obvious that he now knew how she felt about him. Her hands trembled as she reached back into the sink for another dish. They worked quietly beside each other for a few minutes, neither knowing what to say.

Jennifer finally worked up enough courage to glance over at him, finding his eyes on her. She smiled at him, looking back down at her work. "I guess I caught you guys at a bad time," he offered, letting a small chuckle escape his lips.

Jennifer couldn't help but smile at his words. "I don't know if I'd call it a bad time, just . . ." she searched for the right word, and then looking over at him, "awkward." He smiled at her, folding the cup towel and placing it down.

Turning to face her, he added, "I'm glad I walked in though."

"Why's that?" she asked, feigning ignorance. She could feel her heart racing and wondered if he could hear it from where he stood. 

"I would've never known."

"Known what?" she barely whispered.

"You haven't been completely honest with me." Jennifer looked up, startled at his accusation. 

"I've always been honest with you, Brian. Right from the start," she defended herself, wondering where he was going with this.

"You didn't tell me how you really felt about me," he pointed out. She turned back to her work, but he took her by the hand and turned her towards him. "Why?"

She searched his eyes for a moment, not sure how to answer. She didn't want to confess her true feelings and not have them returned. She desperately hoped Nick had been right . . . that he felt the same way. "According to Nick," she answered softly, "I could ask you the same question." He smiled at her words, knowing she was right.

"You could," he grinned at her. "Right after you answer my question."

Her eyes dropped to his hand holding hers, his fingers lightly massaging hers. She smiled and said, "To tell you the truth, in the beginning I just didn't want my feelings to get in the way of my job and your career." She looked up at him, holding his eyes with hers. "And then ..." She stopped, her eyes dropping again. "And then ... I didn't think there would be any way that you'd ever feel that way about me."

Brian stared at her for a moment, wondering what he had done to make her think that he wouldn't be interested in her. It had taken everything he had had not to pull her into his arms every time they had been together. He felt closer to her than anyone ... even the guys in the band. As his left hand continued to hold hers, his right hand gently cupped her chin, lifting her eyes to meet his. He was stunned at the tears that now filled her luminous blue eyes. He shook his head in amazement. It was suddenly obvious that they had felt the same way about each other since the beginning and he couldn't find the words to voice his feelings. All he could do was stare at her, lost in her eyes. 

He leaned into her, his lips gently brushing hers. Jennifer's eyes closed, a small sigh escaping her lips as they parted beneath his. Drawing her into his embrace, Brian's arms went around her, pulling her closer to him. Jennifer's hands clutched at the sides of his shirt, not knowing where to go; but as she leaned into him, they traveled slowly up his back, reveling in the feel of him finally in her arms. As his lips continued to brush across hers slowly, seductively, Jennifer felt her legs turn to jelly; unsure she could support herself anymore. Just when she thought she would drop, Brian pulled back slowly, staring into her eyes silently. He smiled at her and then drew her back into his embrace, his mouth next to her ear.




Love's Harmony Ch. 08



"I can't believe this, not after all this time," he confessed quietly, his lips nibbling on her earlobe. She smiled at his words, her eyes shutting in her attempt to hold onto this moment.

"Me either," she admitted. "I didn't think you felt the same about me."

He drew back again, keeping her close to him but where he could look into her face. "I'm surprised you didn't see it before now," he said. "I had a hard time keeping my hands off of you."

"Why didn't you say something?" she asked, incredulous at his words.

He shook his head in amazement this time. "I don't know ..." he said, stroking her long hair with one hand, his other one around her waist. "I guess for the same reasons you didn't. I didn't think you returned my feelings."

Jennifer laughed gently. He drew her into his embrace again, kissing her cheek, nose, eyes. "Oh, Brian ..." She drew him closer still, her arms encircling his neck, her lips searching desperately for his, afraid now to let him go ... afraid of losing this moment forever! But what scared her the most was the predicament they were now in. She worked for the band and Brian was the band. It was unprofessional and she knew they couldn't have a relationship, as much as she wanted it. But for now, she just clung onto him, her lips molded to his.



Love's Harmony Ch. 09



The concert was sold out and Jennifer was having a great time for once just watching and enjoying the show. She had watched the first half from the skirts of backstage, but now she had moved to the secured area right in front of the stage. They had just started their new release off their album, and the crowd was going crazy.

Not meaning to, but sub-consciously doing it anyway, she stopped in front of Brian. She stood, mesmerized by the passion she saw in his performance: the way he closed his eyes, the way he spoke with his hands, the way he seemed to be singing just to her. “I’d go anywhere for you, anywhere you ask me to. I’d do anything for you, anything you want me to.”

Suddenly, his eyes were on her, the words he sang coming directly to her and Jennifer was moved to tears. They were singing one of her favorite songs, ‘Anywhere For You’. As she listened to the words and watched Brian watching her, she knew he was pleading with her to let go of her misgivings about starting a relationship with him. They had talked about it, tried to reason it out, but in the end she had refused to get involved with him while they were on the road. 

The tears continued to fall, streaming down her face as she was once again swept up by Brian’s singing. “I know you’re afraid to let your feelings show. And I understand, girl, but it’s time to let go. I deserve a try, honey just once, give me a chance and I’ll prove you’re wrong . . .” There was no doubt that Brian was singing this song to her. His eyes bore into hers and she knew that if she didn’t leave, she wouldn’t be able to resist him any longer!

As she stepped away and started back towards the side stage, Kevin was suddenly there. During the concerts, the guys usually came down from the stage into the secured area in front of the stage and shook hands with the fans. As she stepped to the side to let him pass her by, he grasped her hand and walked her back to where she had been standing in front of Brian, the whole while singing this song that meant so much to her. ‘Baby, I know you’re hurting. You feel like you could never love again …’ She looked from Kevin back up to where Brian stood, his eyes on her and she immediately knew they were doing this on purpose. Kevin continued walking, leaving her where she stood and she looked up at Brian once more before she started back for the side stage, determined to get away from his piercing gaze. 

This time she ran into Nick and she almost burst into tears as he took her hand in his and led her once more to where Brian stood on stage, directly up and in front of where they stood. She could hear the crowd screaming over and over but all she could see was Brian and once more she was drawn into the words. ‘I’ll never let you go. I’d rather die than live without you . . .’ She closed her eyes, her resolve melting to keep their relationship platonic while they were on the road. 

Nick moved on, shaking hands and picking up a gift here and there as he made his way back up onto stage. She glanced back up once more to find Brian’s eyes on her and she knew she had to get away. This time she tried going the opposite direction but this time it was A.J. that she ran into. She stopped suddenly, not sure what to do this time. It was obvious what they were trying to do and she couldn’t help but smile at their efforts. Suddenly A.J.’s hand was covering hers and instead of walking her back to the spot in front of Brian, he was pulling her towards him. She followed him and then balked as she saw where he was taking her. He was taking her up onto stage!! Her heart raced inside her chest as she stopped, pulling back. There was no way she was going onstage!! She wouldn’t be able to resist Brian onstage in front of thousands of screaming fans, not while he was singing this song! 

“Alex, no!” she said to him as he continued to sing, all the while pulling her onto stage. “Alex …” Suddenly they were onstage and she knew the fans could see her because they were going crazy!! She stopped fighting him and walked slowly to where Brian stood, his hand reaching out for hers. The crowd was shouting their approval and Jennifer was suddenly swept into the frenzied atmosphere as she watched Brian walk towards her, all the while singing . . . begging her to give in to him and she knew in her heart that she would!



“Hey!” Jennifer looked up from the couch to see A.J. come into the room.

“Hey,” she answered, smiling up at him.

As he walked in front of her and sat on the nearby chair, he asked, “What are you watching?’

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m just flipping through the channels really.” The room was dark except for the light from the television and a small lamp on the table in the kitchen. “You want to watch something?”

“Nah,” he answered, looking over at her. He watched her for a few minutes and then said, “Jen, I want to apologize to you.”

She looked over at him, a questioning look on her face. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’ve been a real jerk to you since we started this tour and I owe you an apology.”

“No you don’t,” she answered, smiling at him.

“Yes I do,” he answered, shaking his head at her. “I doubted you and I was wrong. I admit when I’m wrong.”

She smiled at him, reaching over to take his hand. “I appreciate that Alex, I do. But I know you were just looking out for the band. You weren’t sure and that’s okay. I knew I had a job to do and you helped me do it well. If I hadn’t, you wouldn’t have accepted me, and now you have.”

He smiled at her, squeezing her hand. “Well, I just wanted to apologize. You’ve proved yourself over and over again on this tour and I appreciate all you’ve done for us.”

Jennifer just smiled and squeezed his hand before she released it. “You’re a sweet guy, Alex … no matter what anyone says.” They laughed for a moment as they watched the tube.

And then suddenly, he asked, “So, the concert went great today, don’t you think?”

She looked over at him, surprised at the sudden turn of conversation. “Yeah . . . right up to the part where you drug me on stage,” she replied, giving him the best evil expression she could muster.

“Yeah, well . . .” he laughed, looking over at her. “Did it work?”

“No,” she replied.

“When are you and B-Rok going to give it up?” he asked, shaking his head at her.

“What do you mean?” she asked, looking over at him.

“I mean, you’ve given it your best shot, but it’s time to get it out in the open, you know what I mean? It’s killing him.” He watched her as she turned away from him, intent on the television. But he could see the range of emotions crossing her face. “What’s up with that?” he prompted her.

Turning back to him, she said, “A.J., I have a job to do.”

“And you’re doing it, “ he argued. “What does Bri have to do with that?”

“Everything,” she barely got out. Just thinking about it brought tears to her eyes. A.J. saw them and reached out for her hand again. She swallowed hard, trying to get past the lump that suddenly formed in her throat. “I have to think about what’s best for the band,” she managed, and then stopped, fighting back the flood of tears that threatened to engulf her. She tried desperately to retain control over her flighty emotions. “Me getting involved with Brian, well … it just isn’t in the best interest … of the band … of you guys,” she said, looking over at him. 

He could see the tears glistening in her eyes. “Shit Jennifer! That’s a piece of crap excuse and you know it.” he said. “The fans saw you guys and loved it. No repercussions came from that. That was your proof right there. What else do you need?”

She tried to smile, but it came out more like a grimace. He felt for her. It was obvious she was in love with Brian but was torn over her loyalties and his. “I’ve never … felt the way about … anyone, the way I do … for him,” she said, a tear silently sliding down her cheek. She quickly reached up, brushing it away, looking at the T.V. once more, as if that could take her away from the feelings she was having.

“He feels that way about you too,” he offered, lightly massaging her hand with his. “You can work it out. It’ll be okay.”

“I wish that was true,” she said, looking at him once again as the tears continued to slide slowly down her face. She brushed them away once again, determined to get a hold of herself. “Alex, it’s just not possible. I’m here to promote the band and what’s best for it. Getting involved with Brian would not work … as much as I wish it could.”

A.J. continued to show his silent support, as she sought to get control of herself. At that moment, both of them heard a door close at the back of the bus and Jennifer reached up the wipe her face clear as A.J. sat back. “What’s going on?” Nick asked, coming into the room and catching on to the sullen mood.

A.J. looked at Jennifer as she stared back at him silently, her eyes begging him not to say anything. He nodded and said, turning to Nick, “Nothing.”

Nick looked over at Jennifer and saw that something had happened but it was obvious she didn’t want to talk about it. “Okay,” he replied, coming over to sit beside A.J. on the couch. “What’s on that’s good?”

“Here,” Jennifer replied, handing over the remote control. “It’s late and I’m tired.” Both guys stood as she got up from her chair and started for the room she was sharing with Fatima. She looked over at A.J. and said, “Good night.” But he could see she was saying more than that and he smiled at her as he nodded his head in response. 



The next morning, A.J. walked through the sitting area of the bus, searching for Jennifer. It was obvious that she had been here . . . breakfast sat on the table and Nick and Howie sat filling their plates. “Where’s Jennifer?” he asked, grabbing a slice of bacon.

“I don’t know,” Howie replied, taking his plate over to the couch, settling down to dig in.

“What do you mean ‘you don’t know’? She fixed breakfast, right?”

“Yeah, but then she left.”

“Well, was she dressed? Did she say where she was going? Help me out here.”

“What’s the big deal?” Nick asked, and then looking at him. “All the sudden you two have formed a friendship. What’s up with that?”

“I finally realized what a special lady she is,” he admitted, regret filling him once again as he was reminded of how he had treated her on this trip. If he hadn’t been such a jerk … And then focusing on the task at hand, “So, help me out. Where is she?”

“I think she’s getting dressed,” Howie replied, taking a bite of the omelet she had made him. “Damn, I’m gonna get fat if I keep eating like this. When you find her, tell her she’s outdone herself again,” he said, smiling up at A.J. as he took another big bite.

A.J. laughed, heading out the door and to the R.V. that she shared with Fatima. When he reached the door, it was cracked open and he pushed it open a little wider. “Jen?’

“Yeah?” came the call from the bathroom down the hall.

“Are you decent? Can I come in?”

Jennifer recognized A.J.’s voice and was surprised. They had made some headway last night in understanding each other, but she was still surprised that he was actually seeking her out. “Yeah,” she answered, wondering what he wanted. “Come on back.”

When he entered he saw she about halfway dressed. She had on blue jean shorts that were buttoned halfway up and a fushia colored lace bra. Her long blonde hair was pulled up into a ponytail and she was sitting at the dressing table, putting her make-up on. She looked up at him and he smiled sheepishly at her as she said, “Hi. What’s going on?”

“Are you sure this isn’t a bad time?” he asked, surprised that she let him in half dressed. 

“I’m not embarrassing you, am I?” she teased. She turned back to the make-up table, lightly powdering her face.

“No,” he answered, taking a seat on the closed toilet. 

“So, what’s going on?” she asked, knowing he wasn’t here just to shoot the breeze. She hoped he wasn’t going to talk about last night, but something inside told her that’s exactly what he was going to do. So she wasn’t surprised when he brought up Brian and their conversation the previous night.

“Look, I know what you said last night and I’m not trying to harp on the subject, but I think you’re doing yourself a real injustice by not doing what’s true to your heart. You and Brian belong together. It’s time y’all worked it out.”

Jennifer looked over at him, taking a deep breath. This was not the way she wanted to start out her day. “Alex, I appreciate what you’re trying to do, really … I do. But I thought I made it clear last night. Starting a relationship with Brian is not in the best interest of the band.”

“I don’t understand that,” he said, shaking his head at her. “So, you and Brian are together. How does that hurt the band? You still have a job to do and he does too. What does one have to do with the other?”

She stood up and crossed over to the sink to brush her teeth. As she ran the water and filled her brush with toothpaste, she tried explaining it to him. “For one thing, it’s not fair to you guys. Every single one of you have admitted to wanting to have a girlfriend, but how impossible it is when you’re moving from place to place constantly. You’re never in one place long enough to start a relationship. So, how are y’all going to feel if Brian has a built-in girlfriend … one that is always around? That’s just not right, or fair!” She stopped talking as she began brushing her teeth.

“Jen, you have to stop thinking about others and concentrate on what you want … what’s best for you.” He stopped, watching her as she rolled her eyes at him through the mirror. “Don’t do that!” he said. “You treat us like a bunch of children … you take care of us, you cook for us, you take care of all our problems and you’re a good sounding board. You act just like Kevin! It’s like you two are our parents.” He stopped, getting up from where he sat and crossed over to face her. “My god! You’re twenty-three years old. You’re beautiful and available! You may a have a job to do, but it’s okay to have a life.”

Jennifer finished brushing her teeth, wiped her mouth and turned to face him. She took a deep breath and sighed. “Don’t think I haven’t thought about each point that you’ve said, Alex. I have. The truth is, when I’m in a relationship I’m very selfish. I like to be the center of attention. To me, the relationship has to come first. Now,” she pointed out the obvious. “Brian cannot give me that … not now. You know he can’t. The band is his life … you guys. I can’t ask him to choose. I won’t.”

A.J. watched her for a moment, not believing she was telling the whole truth. “But you’re a part of us, he wouldn’t be choosing.”

She smiled at him, knowing how much it took for him to finally admit that she was a part of the group. “It’s still not fair to you guys.” She crossed back over to the dressing table, picking up her shirt and pulling it over her head. A.J. recognized it as being one of Brian’s T-shirts and he knew at that moment that she wasn’t being honest with herself. Even unconsciously, she was thinking of him. A part of him wondered why he was pursuing this issue with her. A part of him wanted things to cool off between the two of them. He hadn’t wanted to be, but in the time they had been together, he had found that he was attracted to her as well. But even as he watched her, he knew that she wasn’t interested in him. She wasn’t interested in Ben. It was all Brian.

“Try to understand what I’m saying,” he said, crossing back over to her and taking a hold of her arm. When she turned to look him in the eyes, he said, “If things work out for you guys then there’s hope for the rest of us.” He stopped, searching her eyes to see if she understood what he was trying to say. “If you guys get together then it’s possible for the rest of us to have a life outside of The Backstreet Boys. That’s what we all want, Jen.”

“I can’t,” she repeated, pulling away from him as she headed for the door.

He followed her for a moment, adding, “We are like family, Jen. When you hurt Brian, you hurt all of us. I’m begging you … he’s miserable. He’s making us miserable. All he wants is to be with you and we want it to happen. Brian is the life-force of the group and when he’s not pumped up, our enthusiasm is gone.”

“Nick doesn’t want it to happen,” she pointed out.

“Nick is confused. He’s nineteen,” A.J. said, smiling at her and shaking his head. “What you don’t know is that at one time every one of us felt the way Nick does. Here we are on tour with a beautiful, single, young woman. Any one of us would’ve liked to be in Brian’s position but it’s B-Rok that you love. We all know that … all of us Jen. Even Nick.” He stopped, taking her hand in his again. Admitting it out loud helped reinforce the same thing for him. “Trust me, we’re okay with this. You are the only one who has to work it out.”

She looked at him for a moment and he could see she was really pondering all that he had said. She looked across the room at a framed picture of her and Brian that sat on her dressing table and then back at A.J. She tried to smile at him but he could see her eyes turning a little misty as she said, “I wish it was that easy, Alex.”

“It is,” he said, hoping he could convince her for Brian’s sake … for her sake … for his sake. But all she did was squeeze his hand, let go and leave the bathroom. He watched her for a moment, cursing that he hadn’t done any good. 



Love's Harmony Ch. 10



The van from the local radio station here in New York picked up the group at their hotel early the next morning. It must have been 6:00 am. Jennifer would be accompanying them on this trip, so she was in the bathroom of her R.V. when she heard Howie calling, “Jen! Come on, it’s time to go!” She stepped out of the bathroom, smoothing her hair one last time. His greeting froze in his throat as his jaw dropped comically. A single word emerged. “Wow!”

Jennifer stopped and turned around to see what he was talking about when it dawned on her that his remark was pointed at her and she turned back around, a smile on her face. “Thanks!” she replied, sub-consciously running her hands down the front of her simple black a-line dress. “You like it?”

“Like it?” he asked, running his hand down his cheek to stop at his jaw. “You’re gorgeous! Eres bella!”

She smiled once more, moving towards him and taking him by the arm. “Well, let’s go if we’re going,” she said.

“Yeah, okay,” he said, looping her arm through his as he escorted her off the R.V., his eyes on her the whole way.



Once inside the studio, Jennifer sat on the other side of the glass window separating her and some others from the d.j.s and BSB sitting inside the recording studio. They were talking about their concert that would be taking place this evening here in New York and all the hoopla that went with it. One incident that had occurred was that some girls had broken into the bus and had been waiting for them when they had gotten back from their technical rehearsal this afternoon.

The guys were laughing about it and the d.j.s were asking if that didn’t concern them. Kevin was explaining to them how they’ve had to tighten up on security as they had gotten more popular, but sometimes things like that still happened. They said that it had been harmless and the girls had been young, just wanting their autographs.

The conversation suddenly turned to a more personal note, when they asked Nick point-blank about his love life. “Nick, it’s been rumored that you have a girlfriend on this tour. Is there any truth to that?”

Nick looked around the room, his gaze finally coming to rest on Brian. “Well,” he began, clearing his throat. “I was interested in someone, but things didn’t work out between us.”

Kevin jumped in saying, “We’re not supposed to have girlfriends. It’s hard to do that when you’re on the road all the time.”

“But the rumor is that this girl is traveling with you guys,” the d.j. insisted. Outside the studio, Jennifer squirmed on her chair. This is just what she had feared!

“I think the girl you guys are talking about is our publicity director, Jennifer Matthews,” Brian suddenly said. All eyes suddenly turned to him, wondering where he was going with this. Jennifer suddenly felt sick to her stomach.

“We didn’t have a name, but that sounds about right,” the d.j. said, checking his notes. “There’s a story there then …” he prompted Brian to continue.

Brian looked over at the guys once more and then through the glass to catch Jennifer’s gaze upon him. “No, there’s no story,” he said, watching her shake her head at him, begging him not to say anything. “You know how rumors get started when you’re on tour.”

“What about you Brian?” the d.j. asked. “Are you seeing anyone at the time?”

“Well, it’s like Kevin already said,” he said, his eyes turning back to the d.j. “It’s difficult to have a relationship when you’re on the road, but …” He looked out once more to catch Jennifer’s eyes on him. “I’m trying to work something out with someone at the time.” Jennifer closed her eyes and lowered her head. What was he trying to do?

A.J. turned his head to see Jennifer shaking her head outside of the studio. He knew this was the last thing she wanted discussed. “We all would like to start a relationship right now,” he offered. “We’re all human, but the tour’s our main concern right now. Jennifer travels with us and is seen with us all the time. We’re all real close and sometimes the media can blow things out of proportion.” And then looking at the d.j.s in the studio, added, “No offense against you guys.”

“None taken,” he laughed and then turned his head to see Jennifer standing outside of the booth. “Jennifer accompanied you guys here today, is that right?”

“Yeah,” Nick answered. “She goes with us to make sure we don’t say anything we’re not supposed to,” he added. The guys all started laughing as she gave them a look. And then turning to Brian, said, “I think B-Rok might be in trouble for his comment.” They all laughed once more.



Fatima looked up from her book, wondering who would be knocking on the door at this time. The concert had been over for a couple of hours and they would be pulling out any minute. “Come in!” she called, surprised when Brian opened the door and came up into the RV. “B-Rok!” she said. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey, Fatima,” he replied, quickly scanning the sitting area. “Where’s Jen?”

“She’s in the bathroom,” she answered, closing her book and looking at Brian. “You shouldn’t be here,” she said, pointing out the obvious. “We’re about to pull out and she doesn’t want to see you.”

Brian crossed the space between them quickly, coming to perch beside her on the couch. “Fatima … I need a big favor.”

“Oh no,” she said, shaking her head. “Whatever it is, the answer is no.”

“You don’t even know what I’m going to ask,” he argued.

“If it has anything to do with Jennifer, forget it. She’d die if she knew I let you into the camper.”

“Fatima,” he pleaded, clasping his hands together in a prayer-like manner. “I’m begging. I have to spend some time alone with her. You’re my only hope.”

She sighed, knowing full well she was going to give into him and Jennifer would kill her. She had made it clear that she wanted to steer clear of him. Being close to him and not being able to touch him was killing her and Fatima had promised to help her. “B-Rok …” She looked up at him, his big blue eyes pleading with her own. “Shit! What do you want me to do?” She couldn’t believe she was going to do this!

“Can you travel in a different bus tonight?” he asked, knowing he was pushing it, but he had to have some time alone with Jennifer. He had to convince her that they belonged together, despite her reservations and the job.

“Bri!” she exclaimed, looking back towards the bathroom. “I can’t do that!”

“Please!?” he pleaded as John, the driver of the RV got in the front seat.

“B-Rok, you riding with us tonight?”

Brian looked back at Fatima. “Please …”

“Jennifer’s going to kill me,” she trailed off, staring at Brian.

“What’s the scoop, B-Rok?” John asked, firing up the RV. “It’s time to roll.”

Brian looked at Fatima once more, hoping she’d do as he said. She shot him a look as she grabbed her book and her purse. “You owe me big, Brian Littrell,” she said, heading for the door.

“Thanks, Fatima,” he said smiling, following her to the door. “The guys in our bus said you could ride with them tonight or Mike said he had room in his bus.”

Fatima turned to look at him once more. “Just one more thing,” she said, smiling at him. “Good luck. I hope everything works out for you the way you want it too.”

“Thanks!” he said, bestowing a kiss on her cheek. “Keep your fingers crossed.” Fatima smiled at him one last time, closing the door behind her. Brian turned towards John. “I’m staying,” he said.

John smiled. “You better hope Jennifer’s in a good mood.” He turned around in his chair and then added, “Good luck!” Brian smiled and set about the task of turning the RV into a more romantic setting for what he wanted to accomplish tonight.

Jennifer stepped out of the bathtub as the RV fired up. She knew she’d have to hurry before it rolled out. She wanted to be out of the bathroom and settled in for the long drive that was before them tonight. She left her hair loosely knotted at her neck as she went through her nightly routine of lotioning her body, moisturizing her face and preparing for bed. She stepped into her lace bikini panties and then slipped into Brian’s favorite jersey that she had taken. He had been missing it for two weeks, thinking he had left it somewhere. It was the one thing she had that kept her close to him. As it slid past her head, she inhaled the scent of him that still lingered on it. She smiled and then looked into the mirror one last time before opening the door and turning off the light.

The sitting area was dark except for the lamplight that came from the kitchen table. Soft music was playing and Jennifer wondered for just a moment if Fatima had already turned in for the night. As the RV pulled away into the night, she could see through the window them pass the band’s bus and just for a moment, she wondered what Brian was doing. She walked through kitchen to the sitting room, her eyes glued to the bus outside her window. She had passed right by Brian sitting at the kitchen table behind her without knowing it. 

Once the RV passed the bus, Jennifer let out a small sigh and sat down in the chair that sat opposite of the couch, reaching down to the small shelf for a book. She needed something to take her mind off Brian. They had six more weeks on the road and she wondered if she was going to be able to keep this up. As she sat back in the chair, opening the romance novel she had chosen, she heard someone coming into the sitting room. Thinking it was Fatima, she said, “I thought you had already turned in for the night.” She looked up into Brian’s face as he sat down on the couch opposite her. Her face registered surprise and then nervousness. She reverted her eyes from his, looking down at the book in her hands. “Where’s Fatima?” she asked quietly.

“She’s on one of the other buses,” he admitted, hoping she wasn’t angry with him. The last thing he wanted was to start another fight.

“What are you doing here, Brian?’ she asked, looking up at him again.

“I had to see you,” he simply stated, and then noticed the shirt that she had on. It was the one he had been looking for and then given up for lost. It was his favorite! He smiled at the knowledge that she had taken it for herself. It warmed him to the core to see her wearing his clothes. It was like a sign or an omen … she was thinking of him more than she let on. He pointed to the shirt, saying, “I see you found my shirt. I thought I had lost it.”

She looked down, remembering that she had it on. She blushed prettily, realizing she had been caught. She looked up at him. “I’m … sorry. I shouldn’t have taken it.”

He laughed, saying, “I’m glad you did.” Reaching across the distance between them, he caught her hand up in his. “It looks really good on you.”

She pulled her hand back from him, her eyes in her lap. “Brian, please … don’t.”

He sighed, running his hand over his short hair, sitting back into the chair across from hers. “Jen, why are you doing this?”

“You know why,” she answered, looking up into his eyes. He could see the tears starting to form in her eyes and his heart reached out to hers.

He stood up from where he sat, coming to squat down on the floor in front of her. Looking her square in the eye and as earnestly as he could, he said, “Jen … tell me you don’t feel the same way about me, that you don’t want to take me into your arms every time I walk past. Tell me that you don’t believe in your heart that we belong together, that we’ve met for this one reason.” As he watched her face soften at his words and the tears form in her eyes, he reached out to touch her cheek. “Just tell me you don’t love me the way I love you, and I’ll stop. But unless you tell me that Jen, I’ll never leave you alone. I love you.”

She could feel the tears slowly sliding down her cheeks and she couldn’t help but reach out tentatively with a hand to brush his cheek. His eyes closed at her touch and then opened again to mesh with hers and she knew she couldn’t deny him any longer. “Oh, Brian ...” was all she could say as he pulled her into his embrace. The moment his lips touched hers, she knew that she was made for this, for him. She found herself lying in his arms, as her hands wandered into his shirt, and he ran his down his jersey that covered her body. It was big and loose on her but he could feel her taut young body under them, and he swelled with desire for her.

“I want you. I want you so much … “ he whispered into her ear.

“I love you …” She hadn’t meant to say the words, but they had slipped out, and he looked startled, as he looked up at her, lying on top of him, her small frame barely pressing down on his large one.

“I love you too, Jen. I know it sounds crazy, but I’ve loved you since that first morning in Jim’s office.” She kissed him this time, with a passion so urgent that he forgot everything and everyone but this moment, this woman lying in his arms. He carried her into the other room and laid her down on her bed. Her eyes never left his as she watched his clothes come away from his magnificent body. He leaned over her, slipping his jersey over her head and tossing it over to join his clothes on the floor. 

He inhaled sharply as her body met his hungry gaze …. perfection at it’s best. And then they forgot everything in each other’s arms, everything except the love they shared, which had grown from the ashes of pain and hurt and disappointment. They had a great deal to give each other and Brian had never been happier as they lay on her bed afterwards. “Where have you been all my life?” he whispered as she nestled into his arms and fell asleep. And he smiled as he looked down at her and stroked the long silky blonde hair. She took his breath away and as he pulled her closer to him even still, he vowed to never let anything or anyone come between them again.



Love's Harmony Ch. 11



Brian's voice rang true and clear in the packed auditorium. 'Hey girl, I don't want you to cry no more inside. All the money in the world could never add up to all the love I have inside... I love you.' Then the rest of the group joined in, their voices carrying right to the back of the packed auditorium. The concert was going great and Jennifer couldn't have been any happier. Through the past three weeks, things were finally working out for her and Brian. Glad to have the past behind them and a road of happiness ahead of them, Jennifer watched The Backstreet Boys perform from the sides of the stage. She watched Brian, her eyes following every step he made. When he came to the side where she stood, his eyes would lock with hers as he sang the words to their songs. Every time they came off-stage for a costume change, he would either embrace her or catch a quick kiss. Nick was constantly smiling and she knew that he was finally okay with it and nothing could ruin what she had... at least nothing Jennifer was aware of.

"Hi. I'm looking for Jennifer Matthews. Where would I find her?" One of the bouncers, Gary, looked up into the face of a young man whom he had never seen before.

"What do you want with Jennifer?" he asked, suddenly suspicious.

"I'm an old acquaintance of hers from Texas," he said, flashing his backstage pass at the man standing guard at the backstage entrance.

"The backstage party has been over with now for almost two hours," he replied, giving the young man a once over with his eyes. He didn't remember Jennifer telling him to look out for an old friend. "Is she expecting you?"

"No," he replied quickly, smiling at the big guy standing in front of him. Something told him that this big guy was particularly fond of Jennifer. "I wanted to surprise her. Trust me... she'll want to see me."

"Well..." he began, not sure whether or not to let him by.

"Look, we go back a long way and she'll be real disappointed if I don't get a chance to talk to her. It's important."

"Okay," he said, not wanting to disappoint Jennifer. She was so sweet and anything he could do to help her out was just an added bonus.

"Thanks," he said, walking past Gary on his way backstage.

Suddenly Gary took hold of his arms just before he could pass through the door. "What did you say your name was?" he asked again, not remembering if he had asked before.

"I didn't," he said, and then smiled at him. "It's Ty... Ty Crump."

"Oh, okay," Gary replied, releasing his arm as the young man disappeared behind the door. Once inside, the loud mix of pop and R&B met his ears. He could also hear the screaming crowd beyond the tons of equipment and props that were standing before him. He squeezed through the crowd of technicians and ground crew that were running around keeping the special effects and sound in working order.

Ty made his way towards the music, wondering if he would be able to find Jennifer there. It had taken quite a feat to finally track her down and he had been shocked when he learned she was the publicity director for one of the hottest bands to hit the U.S. in a while. One day he hadn't heard of The Backstreet Boys and now, suddenly, they were everywhere! And the fact that Jennifer was working and traveling with them was a surprise and a thrill. Ty and Jennifer had shared a love of good music and as he worked his way through the crowd, he enjoyed the music. The closer he got to finding Jennifer, the more excited he became. He knew she would be shocked to see him, but he also hoped that enough time had passed to heal some of the hurt. He had finally realized he couldn't live without her!

"They look great!" Fatima said into Jennifer's ear. 

She turned her head, smiling at her friend. "They sure do!" she replied, turning back to watch them. She practically had to yell to be heard over the crowd and the guys. "I love the choreography!"

"Thanks!" Fatima yelled back. "This is my favorite routine!" Both women watched the guys take the audience from hysteria to frenzied hysteria. Jennifer was amazed at how they could take hold of the fans and transport each one of them into a world of their own. She knew how it was... each screaming young lady out there was imagining that these guys were singing to just her. But each time Brian got close to her side of the stage, his eyes meshed with hers sending a message only to her and she knew, just knew that he was singing just to her. She wrapped her arms around herself, deliriously happy with her life for once. Things were finally working out for her!

"Jennifer!" She turned at the sound of her name to find Gary suddenly beside her. "Hey, did that guy ever find you?"

"What guy?" she asked, confusion clouding over her beautiful features.

"Uh... shit! What was his name...?" he muttered to himself.

Suddenly Jennifer saw him from beyond Gary's shoulder and her face went ashen as she whispered, "Oh my god... Ty."

"What?" Gary asked, cupping a hand to his ear.

"It's Ty!" she repeated, not really responding to Gary but muttering his name in disbelief.

"Yeah! that's it!" Gary said suddenly. "Ty!"

Jennifer's gaze turned towards Gary, surprise registered there. "You let him in here?" she asked.

"Yeah," he answered, concern suddenly coming over his face. "Why? Is there a problem?"

"Shit!" she replied, suddenly looking for a place to hide, a place to run to. She didn't want to see him. She couldn't see him! Panic suddenly rose up in her as she watched him approach where she stood with Fatima and Gary. She hadn't seen Ty since the evening before their wedding day and now, suddenly he was here! Here in her world... her world with Brian!! "Oh shit!" she repeated. BSB was starting a new song and the beat matched Jennifer's heartbeat at that same fast rate.

"Are you okay?" Fatima asked, holding onto her friend's arm. "What's wrong?"

Jennifer turned towards her, panic clearly etched on her face. "Help me," she pleaded.

"What?! Tell me...!" Fatima yelled, looking around for the source of Jennifer's sudden panic.

"It's Ty!" she yelled back, looking back over her shoulder. Suddenly Ty spotted her and he smiled, picking up the pace as he moved deliberately towards where she stood. She turned back towards Fatima, tears springing into her eyes. "What the hell am I going to do?" Fatima shrugged her shoulders, shaking her head at the predicament that was suddenly here. After all she and Brian and had been through, it just wasn't fair for this Ty guy to show up now... here.

Jennifer turned to meet Ty head on, not sure of what she was going to say but knowing she had to say something. There was no place to run... no place to hide, and to tell the truth, she was tired of running from him, from the pain that she was suddenly shocked to find was still there.

"Jen!" he called, a bright smile crossing his handsome face. She couldn't help but look him over, her eyes recalling every little thing about him that she had known so well... those inviting lips, that sexy smile of his, the way his hair curled at the nape of his neck, and those eyes! God... she had forgotten the way his eyes caressed her when they took hold of hers. "Jen," he repeated, swinging her around in his embrace. "God, it's good to see you!"

Jennifer pushed away from him, backing out of his embrace. Her eyes glowered at him as she spit out, "How dare you! You have some nerve coming here after, after..." She stopped, searching for the words to express how she felt. And then she knew she didn't know how she felt! A part of her wanted to slap his face and spit in his eye and then a part of her wanted to fall into his embrace and cry on his shoulder. "What the hell are you doing here?" she finally asked.

"Jen, I know you're pissed. You have every right to be," he offered, taking a step towards her once more. She backed off from him automatically, right into Gary.

"Okay," Gary announced, quickly assessing the situation and stepped forward, grabbing Ty by the arm. "It's time for you to leave, buddy."

Ty jerked his arm back from Gary. "Back off," he hissed and then turning to Jennifer. "Jen..." he pleaded. "You have to give me a chance to explain."

"I don't have to do anything," she said, tears suddenly springing into her eyes. After all this time, after all that had happened, she was amazed at the hurt he had brought with him again. "You made that choice for me a long time ago," she said, shaking her head at him sadly.

Suddenly Fatima was at her side, her eyes blazing at Ty. "Jennifer, tell this jerk to hit the road," she hissed.

Jennifer turned to her friend, confusion clouding her beautiful features. "Where's Brian?" she asked.

"He's still on stage, sweetie," she crooned and then her eyes turning hard back to Ty. "Get this jerk out of here before he comes off."

"Who's Brian?" Ty suddenly demanded. "Jennifer, we have to talk."

"It's none of your business who Brian is!" she suddenly shouted at him. If there was one thing she didn't want, it was for Brian and Ty to meet... especially here and now. She wasn't sure what Brian would do if he found Ty was here. And she wasn't sure what Ty would do, or better yet, what he would say. They had a lot of history together and Jennifer wasn't about to add a new problem that could come between her and Brian again. "Leave, Ty. Just leave!"

"Not until I have a chance to talk to you... to explain what happened," he said, taking a hold of her elbow. She tried to wretch it away and he held fast to her. "I deserve that at least," he pleaded with her. "Please..."

"Don't listen to him," Fatima interjected as Gary moved towards Ty once more.

"Back off," Ty warned, giving Gary a look. At his height of six two and the stature to go with it, he didn't have a problem tangling with Gary if needed. Gary knew it too as he stopped, looking over at Jennifer for direction.

She looked at Ty once more and then relented. "Its okay, Gary." She looked over at him. "Its okay," she repeated once more. And then looking at Ty she said, "Make it quick. I want you gone by the time Brian comes off-stage."

"Who's Brian?" he asked once more, looking back over her shoulder on to stage.

"It's none of your business," she repeated. "Get on with your story."

"Jennifer," he said, trying to draw her into his embrace. "I was a fool. I love you. Nothing's changed."

She slapped at his hands as they tried to encircle her waist. "You jerk!! You asshole!! Everything's changed!!" she said, her voice lifting with every word that came out of her mouth. "The minute my father had to stop the wedding to announce to me and the 350 guests that were there that you hadn't bothered to show up for our wedding, everything changed!!" She stepped away from him, started to walk away and then circled back to face him once more. "You are a dog!! The lowest of low!! I can barely stand to look at you!!"

"Bullshit!" he countered. "You still love me or you wouldn't give a shit!"

Tears sprang into her eyes as she stared at him. "You don't know what love is!" she retorted. "If you had really cared about me, you wouldn't have left me at that altar." When he just stood there and watched her she fired again, "You had a choice to either walk down that aisle or not and chose the later!"

"You're right," he admitted. "But now, now I choose you. I was a fool but I'm here to make amends.... to get you back and I'm not leaving without accomplishing that goal!"

"You're so full of crap!" she screamed, suddenly losing control of her anger. She flailed at him then, her small fists beating on his chest. "You deserted me at that altar!! Do you know how humiliating that is?! Do you have any idea what you put me through?!" Through her tears all she could see was that terrible day, the faces of the 350 guests that sat waiting and then the pity written across everyone's face that she had seen afterwards.

Ty pulled her into his embrace and she collapsed against him, gasping for breath and the tears rolling unchecked down her face. She leaned into him, her sobs racking her body. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. It had been so long and he longed to kiss her, to make everything right between them again. They had loved another so well and he wanted that back again.

That is how Brian found them as the band came off stage one last time for their final costume change. The rest of the guys stopped around him as he stopped suddenly, wondering who in the hell was holding his girlfriend! And then suddenly he saw her step away from him once more, her hand coming up to slap his face. "You heartless bastard!" she screamed.

Suddenly Brian was beside her, reaching past her for Ty as he realized suddenly who it had to be and jealousy like he had never know took over. As he grabbed Ty by the collar and hauled him up before him, he spit out, "Don't you touch her! I swear to God, I'll kill you!"

Ty's physical stature loomed over Brian's smaller one but to no avail. Jennifer quickly realized that in Brian's state of mind that size didn't matter. And worse yet, they were in the middle of a concert! "Don't you talk to me that way, you little punk!" Ty hissed, shoving Brian away from him.

If it hadn't been for Jennifer's hand on Brian's arm pulling him back away from Ty, a physical confrontation would have resulted in Ty's remark. "Brian, don't!" she pleaded with him. "He's not worth it!"

"So... you're Brian," Ty hissed. "Not much to look at." That did it! Brian flew at him, his fists pummeling at his face. Suddenly Kevin, A.J., and Nick were pulling at Brian as Gary tackled Ty to the ground. Jennifer screamed as Fatima took her by the arm, keeping her from getting involved as well. With all the noise that the screaming fans were making back in the audience and all the noise that was suddenly coming from the side stage as well, there were more security suddenly surrounding them and pulling the guys apart. Jennifer burst into tears once more, not only for the situation but for the concert that was quickly coming apart.

She pulled free of Fatima as she charged at Ty, grabbing hold of his arm once more. "Don't do this here," she begged, tears streaming down her face. "Please... this is not the place." She turned to Brian, struggling to free himself of his friends' grips. "Brian," she pleaded, coming over to touch his shoulder. "He's not worth it. You have a concert to finish."

"The only thing I'm going to finish is him," he hissed, struggling once more against Nick and A.J.

"Come on man," Kevin said, coming around to face his cousin. He grabbed hold of Brian's shoulders and shook him as A.J. and Nick continued to hold him. "You've got to let this go. We have a job to finish and Gary can take care of this creep."

Gary had Ty on the floor, placing handcuffs on his wrists as he struggled, calling out for Jennifer. Jennifer looked over at Ty once more and then ran to Brian, throwing her arms around his neck. He quickly shrugged off A.J. and Nick and wrapped her in his embrace. "Did he hurt you?" he asked, kissing her full on the lips and then looking her over.

"No, I'm okay," she cried. "Are you okay?" She looked him over and then wrapped him tighter in her embrace.

"Yeah," he hissed, looking over her shoulder as Gary hauled Ty up.

"Jen," he pleaded. "I've got to talk to you. Please, tell this jerk to get off of me."

She turned to face Ty and said, "You should have never come here." Tears filled her eyes once more as she added, "Why did you come here?"

"To explain what happened. Why I didn't show for the wedding," he said.

"I don't care anymore," she said, shaking her head at him.

"I think you do," he said. Brian started for him once more but Jennifer pulled him back to her. "You want to know what happened and I'm here to tell you. You have to give me a chance to explain."

Jennifer turned to face him. "Okay, so explain."

"Not like this," he said, twisting his head to encompass everyone standing around them. Then he held up his hands for her to see the handcuffs. "We need to talk privately."

She looked around at the crowd. Howie had come back with the guys' outfits and they were quickly shrugging them on, everyone but Brian. She turned towards him and said, "Brian. You have to finish the concert. I'm going to listen to Ty."

"No," he said adamantly, shaking his head at her as he grasped her on the arms. "I'm staying here with you."

"You can't," she explained. "How am I going to explain why you didn't show up for the last part of the concert. It's unprofessional." She turned back to look at Ty once more and then looked at Brian. "He is not worth all the heartache and trouble that this will cause if you don't go back out there."

"She's right," Howie said, handing Brian his outfit. "It's best to come back out and let her handle it." All the rest of the guys nodded in agreement as they slapped him on the back.

He turned to face each of them, knowing he couldn't let them or the fans down. But he was torn between that and the fact that he knew Jennifer needed him. He turned to her once more and took her in his arms, suddenly afraid that after all they had been through this was going to tear them apart once more. As if she could read his mind, she cradled his face in her hands and swore, "Brian... I love you! Nothing changes that. Do you hear me? Nothing!!"

He searched her eyes and then drew her into his embrace, his breath caressing her cheek. "I love you Jen. Don't you ever forget that!"

She pulled back from him, a smile on her face. "Go do your thing and let me handle this. I'm a big girl." She kissed him one last time and pushed him gently to where the rest of the band stood ready to go back on. The crowd was chanting their names over and over, each time getting louder and louder. "Your public awaits. Go give them the show of their lives." She reached over once more, kissing him full on the lips as the guys started back out and a deafening roar met her ears as she watched them jog back onto stage.

Jennifer turned back towards Ty as he shrugged off Gary. "Get off me," he hissed, and then turning towards Jennifer, "Tell this goon to take these off me," he said.

She looked at him, seeing that he was calm and knew now since Brian was back on stage, things would be calmer. "Its okay, Gary," she said turning towards him. "He doesn't need those."

"I'm going to call the cops on his sorry ass," Gary said, picking up his cell phone.

"That's not necessary," she said, reaching out to touch his arm. "It's okay, really." At his questioning gaze, she reassured him once more. "Ty's harmless. It's okay."

"If you say so," Gary grumbled, grabbing his keys and took hold of Ty's arms roughly as he shoved the key into the handcuffs.

"Watch it," Ty warned and then rubbed his wrists when they came loose. "I should sue your ass."

"Ty, you're the one that's interrupted and caused trouble here," Jennifer pointed out as she saw Gary's temper rising once more. "Gary, Fatima... excuse us for a minute," she said, grabbing Ty's arm and ushered him back to the green room at the back of the stage.

"Jennifer, you've got yourself mixed up with a great crowd there," Ty said once they entered the green room and she closed the door behind them. "Where did you get a hold of them?"

Jennifer turned to face him, her eyes blazing. "Drop it and get to the point," she said, crossing her arms over her chest as she glared at him. "Tell me your sad, pitiful story and then get the hell out."

"Jen..." he said, starting for her.

"From there," she demanded, pointing back to the spot where he had been standing.

"Fine," he said, raising his hands in an attempt to hold off her temper. "Whoa girl!" he said, gently laughing at her anger.

"What's so funny?!" she demanded. "Why are you laughing?! There's nothing to laugh about!"




Love's Harmony Ch. 11



"You're just so cute when you're pissed," he said, his eyes still sparkling. "It's one of the things I always liked about fighting with you. That and the making up part," he hinted. "Let's make up Jen... just like we used to."

"That's all in the past," she said, taking a step back from him. "You made sure of that."

"You're right," he agreed. "I screwed up. You know me... when I screw up, I screw up big."

"This is beyond screwing up," she argued, her delicate eyebrows raising at him.

Ty ran his hand back over his hair, sighing. "I know. I know. But I love you Jen and that's all that matters."

"It's not all that matters," she argued. "You have to know that it's over between us."

"No, don't say that," he said, reaching out for her. But she shrugged him off.

"Don't..." she said. "It's over. It's been over since the day you left me standing at the altar. Why did you do that?" she suddenly asked. "What did I do?"

"You didn't do anything..." he said, stepping over to her once more but she backed away from him. He stopped, frustrated at what had happened between them and he knew it was only his fault. "It was me... all me." When she just watched him, he said, "These past few months have been hell for me... "

"Good," she replied, giving him a level look.

"I just got cold feet, Jen. It happens to the best of us."

"Why couldn't it have happened before the wedding day, Ty?" she asked, her heart falling out onto the floor. Why was he here... now, doing this to her?

He shrugged, his eyes pleading with hers to forgive him. "I don't know darling. If I could change the hands of time, I would. If there was anything I could do to take that pain and humiliation from you, I would."

She shook her head, determined not to give into him after all this time. She loved Brian and she would be damned if she was going to let her past get in the way of that. "It really doesn't matter now, Ty. It's over and I'm glad." She looked up at him and added, "If it hadn't been for your cruel actions, I wouldn't have met Brian. So, I guess I should really be thanking you."

"You're not really serious about this Brian guy, are you?" he asked, grabbing hold of her arm.

She yanked back on her arm, but to no avail. He just held her tighter to him. "Let go of me!" she said and then looking up into his face, added, "Yes! I am very serious about Brian. Why wouldn't I be?"

"He's in a band, for god's sake!" Ty pointed out as Jennifer's eyebrows shot up at what he was insinuating. "He's just using you while he's on the road. Once y'all land back in Florida, it'll be over Jen. And you'll be hurt once again. I don't want to see that happen to you." His eyes softened as he looked down into her face once again. Damn, if she didn't still entice him! Especially when she was angry, just like she was now!

"You cold-hearted bastard," she hissed, yanking back from him once more. "It's amazing how you can blame Brian for something you did yourself!"

Ty shrugged his broad shoulders, turning his head towards her once more. "I'm just trying to prepare you for what's in store for you if you really believe this can be real for him."

"I don't have to listen to this," she muttered, turning her back on him as she started to walk away.

"Don't walk away from me," he said, grabbing her arm once more. As Jennifer turned by the sheer force of his grasp on her arm, she suddenly saw Brian's body flash in front of her as he tore Ty's grasp from her arm.

"Don't you dare touch her," he warned, placing himself between Ty and Jennifer.

"Brian," she said, reaching out to touch him on the shoulder. He turned to take her into his embrace. "What are you doing here?" she asked, her gaze boring into his. All of a sudden, Ty's accusations against Brian flew back into her mind and she couldn't help but wonder if what he had said was true. As if Brian could read her thoughts, he said, "I love you Jen. I couldn't just leave you out here with this... this," he turned back towards Ty, his angry gaze raking over him. "This jerk!" he finally spat out before turning back to Jennifer. 

"Oh, Brian," she said, her arms encircling his neck as she held him close to her.

Suddenly Greg was there once again. "Okay buddy, time's up. Time to leave."

"Jen..." he called out once more, but she couldn't hear him... didn't want to hear him. All she could see and hear was Brian and the love she saw shining from his eyes and she knew at that moment that nothing could separate them... nothing could ever come between them again.



Love's Harmony Ch. 12



On Wednesday morning, the guys had an interview on Live With Regis and Kathy Lee, a national talk show series that showed on major networks across the country. The group arrived early in the morning to be greeted by a group of screaming fans. It still amazed Jennifer at how these people found out where these guys would be and then show up in droves! Didn’t these people ever work or go to school? It was amazing!

When they got there, they were quickly ushered into the green room of soundstage three where the talk show was aired and were met by the show’s publicity people, complete with juice, coffee, muffins, bagels and anything else that might be included on a continental breakfast bar. A.J., Howie, and Nick headed straight for the breakfast bar while Kevin walked around introducing himself to everyone in the room. “You know,” Jennifer mused to Brian as she watched Kevin work the room, “He ought to go into politics. He’s always shaking everyone’s hand and I bet if there were babies in the room, he’d be kissing them too.”

Brian laughed alongside her as he took her elbow and escorted her into the room. At that time, the hosts of the show came in and introductions were made. Jennifer was amazed at their openness and friendliness. They seemed to be just your ordinary run-of-the-mill people. But on stage, they were totally different personalities. The guys were told that they would be performing twice on the show . . . once in the middle of the program and then again at the end. Their interview would come right before their first performance. They also asked if it was okay if they cut away to the green room every once in a while before the interview started. Jennifer said that would be fine as soon as they were dressed and she’d send word out once they were. Soon, they were left alone to change and Jennifer excused herself to let them have some privacy, but not before Brian drew her into his arms and kissed her.

“Brian,” she gently chastised him. “You shouldn’t be doing that here.” She stepped back from him, a smile on her face. “You’re not supposed to have a girlfriend . . . remember?”

He just grinned at her and lightly smacked her on the bottom as she left the room. She sent a warning glance back over her shoulder as she closed the door behind her. The show had already started in the studio and Jennifer watched from the sidelines. They started off talking about The Backstreet Boys and the hords of young girls that were inside the studio as well as outside the studio. The girls in the audience started screaming at the mention of the band and Jennifer couldn’t help but laugh at the two hosts as they covered their ears and stared at each other. They, too, were blown away by all the attention these five guys were getting everywhere they went. They kept making jokes that that’s how the two of them were treated everywhere they went as well . . . meaning they didn’t get any attention when compared to these guys! Jennifer was having a good time just watching and anticipating the performance to come. Their last song was going to be a new cut off their new album they were currently working on and they were going to sing it acappella.

Suddenly one of the crew members was beside her letting her know that the guys were dressed except for one thing. “What’s that?” she asked, turning around to face him.

“They forgot their dress socks,” he said.

“What?!” she said, amazed and tickled at the same time. “Their socks?” She covered her mouth, trying not to giggle as she went back to the green room to find all of them standing around in their nice black suits and white tube socks.

Brian looked up at her and flashed that grin that she knew so well before he made a face that cracked the rest of them up. “Hi honey!”

Jennifer rolled her eyes, her hands on her hips. “You goofballs . . . where are your socks?”

“They must still be on the bus,” Nick said, shrugging his shoulders at her. Suddenly a camera man was there, filming the guys standing around in bare feet and white socks. The guys erupted into a freak show act as they showed off their feet and their tube socks. Jennifer could here the crowd in the audience going crazy, realizing they were cutting away to the green room and the audience could see them standing around waiting for socks. 

When the camera man finished, Jennifer replied, “I’ll see what I can do.” She laughed at their antics as she made her way back to the stage area. The show was taking a commercial break and she quickly told the hosts about the predicament backstage.

Regis, one of the hosts, being a sport about the whole thing, said he had plenty of new pairs of socks here at the studio just in case of emergencies and he quickly deemed this as an emergency. As Jennifer turned to give the guys the good news, he said, “Now, once we’re back on the air, I’m going to call them on stage to come out and get these puppies.”

Jennifer smiled at him, saying, “You’re a glutton for punishment, aren’t you?”

“I just want to see this audience go crazy again,” he laughed. She ducked backstage to let the guys know what Phil was going to do and they agreed. Once the tape started rolling again, Phil made a big deal about them coming out to get their socks and they seemed reluctant . . . that is, everyone but Brian. He had on a pair of white tube socks and took off running down the corridor and slid out the door onto stage on the slippery floor. Once the audience saw him emerge, they started screaming and the rest of the band followed him out in a more traditional manner. Each of them went over to where Regis sat, shook his hand and received a pair of socks and then went over to where Kathy Lee sat, the other host of the show, and kissed her on the cheek. Then they left the stage area once more, waving to the frantic fans in the audience.

The next time they appeared on stage, they were fully dressed and came out as a group, all smiles and waves to the crowd. Regis and Kathy Lee, the hosts of the show, were sitting on stools and five extra were sitting out for The Backstreet Boys. As each guy entered, they shook hands with Regis and then bestowed a kiss on Kathy Lee’s cheek before taking their seats. A few minutes passed before anyone could talk because of all the screaming in the studio from the fans in the studio audience. The guys just sat quietly, smiling, waving and shifting uneasily on the high stools. Jennifer stood off to one side, watching them with a smile on her face.

When the commotion finally died down, Regis turned to the audience, saying, “Wow!” Then turning to the guys, said, “Welcome back.”

The crowd starting screaming as Kathy Lee said, “Since you first came here . . .” and then had to turn to the screaming crowd, trying to shush them. “Do you want to hear them talk or not?”

The crowd eventually quieted down as Kevin watched the hosts seriously and the rest of the guys laughed and smiled at the crowd. “How long has it been since you were first here?” Kathy Lee asked. “A year and a half ago?”

“It was one of your first T.V.. appearances,” Regis offered.

“Our very first,” Kevin said.

“Thanks for coming back.” The crowd began clapping and screaming again. “We really appreciate it.”

“In case you haven’t met them,” Regis said, pointing down the line. “This is Kevin, Brian, Nick, Howie and A.J.” The crowd really let loose as the guys smiled and A.J. waved. Eventually Kevin used his arms to try to calm the crowd down as the rest of them smiled

“I guess you guys are used to this, you get this kind of reaction wherever you go.”

“I don’t know if you ever get used to it . . .” Kevin offered.

“You probably grew up hearing about the hysteria my generation had with the Beatles,” Kathy Lee said. “And now here you are experiencing it. What’s the worst part about it and the best part about it?” she asked.

“Very flattering,” Howie said, nodding his head at the crowd. “Very flattering. I mean, what guy wouldn’t want a bunch of screaming women after him?” The rest of the guys nodded and chuckled at his comment.

Brian said, looking over at them, “It takes a lot of your . . . your privacy, as I’m sure you guys know.”

“Yeah,” Kathy Lee teased sarcastically. “We have this kind of hysteria everywhere we go.” The crowd laughed for a moment and then she said, “What is the one thing you can’t do anymore that you wish you could still do?”

“Well, it’s hard to go to the mall sometimes . . .”

“Or Disney World,” Howie offered.

“McDonalds,” A.J. interjected as the crowd began to laugh.

“You can’t go to McDonalds?!” Regis said, mocking shock. “You poor thing . . .” Jennifer couldn’t help but laugh along with that one.

“You have to make phone calls, arrange for security,” Kevin said, turning serious. “You just have to plan ahead.”

Kathy Lee leaned forward, catching all of their eyes before she said, “Obviously, when you’re out as a group, you get a lot more attention because, ‘oh my god! It’s The Backstreet Boys. But when you go out separately, do you run into the same type of thing?”

“Not as bad,” Kevin answered. “But when we’re as a group . . .” He just shook his head.

“But, isn’t this what you wanted? Isn’t this what it’s all about?” Regis asked as the crowd began to shout again. “Is it everything you imagined it would be?”

“It’s more . . .” came the reply in unison from all the guys.

“We never imagined this,” Kevin replied, shaking his head. “I mean, we always wanted to be successful, but we never imagined it would be like this.”

“Is there any thought in your mind that someday this will be over, that all this will be gone?” Kathy Lee asked thoughtfully. “That you’ll have a so called ‘normal life’?”

“It’s always a possibility,” Brian replied. “But I think we’ll be a group as long as we choose to be. We’re five talented individuals and that’s what makes us The Backstreet Boys.” The crowd began to scream once again as all the guys nodded their heads in agreement to Brian’s statement. As Jennifer watched them, she knew no one could have said it better.

Turning to Nick, Phil asked, “Now Nick, since you’ve joined the group, you’ve gotten your high school diploma?” The girls in the crowd went into hysterics at the mention of Nick’s name and he just nodded his head as he watched the crowd. “You joined the group at an early age . . .” Regis continued. “At the age of thirteen . . .” he offered. Suddenly Brian broke into the tune ‘Pomp and Circumstance’ as he used his hands to feign playing a violin. The crowd laughed at his silly antics and Jennifer couldn’t help but laugh herself as she stood in the doorway leading backstage.

“Yeah, you know,” Nick finally said, “I look back and see all the things I missed, you know? The normal high school thing . . . I would’ve liked to play basketball on a team and stuff but then, at the same time, I wouldn’t give this up for the world . . .” The crowd broke out into screams once more.

Regis turned towards A.J., saying, “Now A.J., how long does it take you to shave in the mornings? It must take a while . . .” The group broke into laughter as A.J. stroked his go-tee, breaking out into a grin.

“No, I have to do it quick.” And then on a silly note, he added, “And I changed my hair just for you Regis.” Jennifer shook her head as he ran his hand over his freshly colored hair. The top of it was the color of bright red bricks. The crowd erupted into trickles of laughter as the guys shook their heads at A.J.’s attempts to make a dig at Regis. It was rumored that Regis was a little on the weird side . . .

“And you guys have been together how long?’ Kathy Lee asked, trying to refocus the crowd.

Brian answered, “Seven and a half years . . . almost eight.”

“Eight years . . .” Regis replied. “And you’re constantly together, thrown together. I mean, that’s how it has to be. Are there any pet peeves you have about anybody else on the band?”

Howie shrugged his shoulders, answering, “Well, we’re like brothers . . .”

“So you squabble a little bit?”

“Well, we know what buttons to push . . .” A.J. said, looking over at Nick.

“Okay, anybody who is consistently late?”

Almost in unison, the whole group pointed to Kevin. “Kevin!” 

The crowd broke into laughter as Kevin blushed and looked down. Then opening his hands out to the crowd, tried to explain. “I just . . . uh, I just don’t like to get up.”

“But you’re just a laid back kinda guy . . .” Kathy Lee offered.

“I get it from my mom,” he said, waving into the camera with a grin on his face.

“Is there anybody that’s borrowing, constantly borrowing things from somebody else and doesn’t return them?”

“A.J. . . .”

“Alex . . .”

Nick grinned and said, “He’ll borrow something and you may never get it back.”

“But not because you don’t mean to . . .” Kathy Lee said.

A.J. shook his head and grinned. “It’s either because I lose it or just forget about it,” he replied, looking over his rose-colored shades at her.

“What about Nick?” Kathy Lee asked as the crowd began to scream again.

“Yeah, what’s the problem with Nick?” Regis teased. The crowd, at this point, began to shout that there was nothing wrong with Nick. The guys begin to tease him unmercifully as Jennifer laughed at their antics. They were always teasing each other about something!

“There’s nothing wrong with that precious . . .” Kathy Lee offered.

“Well . . .” A.J. offered, holding up a finger like he had a big secret.

Nick broke in. “Well, I can annoy the guys a little bit.” All of them suddenly broke in, saying how he’s grown up a little bit over the past few years and even started clapping for him as the crowd screamed their approval.

Turning to Kevin, Kathy Lee asks, “Are you the daddy of the group? I mean, do you father these guys a little bit?” The guys started to laugh as Brian acted like an old man with a cane.

“I don’t intentionally do it,” Kevin tried to explain. “But it happens. I just look out for them. They’re like my little brothers.” The guys suddenly started to pretend to be moved to tears as they started laughing.

Suddenly Kathy Lee held up one finger, trying to get everyone refocused as she asked, seriously, “Okay. Important question.” She looked at them with a level gaze and then asked, “Do any of you have serious girlfriends?” The silence followed by that question was enhanced as all the guys suddenly looked over at Brian and then just as suddenly all the girls in the audience start screaming No!

When things started to quiet down, Brian looked over to where Jennifer was standing by the doorway, her huge blue eyes watching him and he smiled. “Um . . .” he suddenly offered, as he grinned at Jennifer. “I’m seeing someone.” As the crowd showed their support by clapping and whistling, he turned back towards the hosts, a big grin on his face.



Love's Harmony Ch. 13



Fatima was stretching on the floor when Brian came through the door, nervousness etched across his brow. She looked up, surprised he was here. "Hey, what are you doing here? I thought you and Jen were going shopping?'

"We are," he said. "But I need you to do me a favor first."

"What?" she asked, stretching down across her outstretched leg.

"Does Jennifer still have her engagement ring from Ty?"

"You mean that ring she was wearing when she first joined the company?" she asked, looking up in surprise. "Yeah, I think so. Why?"

"I need it," he said, looking around the room. "Can you get it for me?"

"Brian," she began, getting up from her position on the floor. "She hasn't worn that thing in months. You don't have to . . ."

"No, I know," he said, smiling at her. "It's nothing like that. I need it for sizing purposes."

"Sizing?" she asked, and then suddenly realizing what he was planning, she gasped, her hand coming up to cover her mouth. "Brian!" She laughed and ran towards him, hugging him into her embrace. "Oh, my god!!"

Brian smiled back at her. "So, are you going to help me out?"

"Of course," she said, hugging him again. "I'm so happy for you guys! Have you said anything to her?"

"No," he said, his face turning serious. "I want it to be a surprise." He stopped for a moment, glancing at his watch. "I can't get into it right now," he explained. "But I'll tell you all about what I'm planning . . . I promise."

"Okay, hold on. I'll go look right now," she said, hurrying back to the back of the bus. But as she fishing around through Jennifer's jewelry, she couldn't find it. Hurrying back to find Brian pacing the floor, she said, "I'm sorry Brian. She must have gotten rid of it."

His eyes showed his disappointment as she said, "Shit! Okay, well . . . I'll have to think of something else."

"You will," she said, smiling over at him.

"Well, I better go," he said, stepping back out the door but then stopped once more as Fatima called out to him.

"Good luck!" she called, hanging out the door.

"Thanks," he said, smiling at her. "I'm going to need it."

They were in Houston Texas and Jennifer began to get excited about being back on home soil. Just a few more days before their last concert in Dallas. Jennifer couldn't believe how quickly the time had passed since she had first met Brian and The Backstreet Boys, but here they were, on the last leg of their journey and she wasn't sure she was ready for it to end. She wasn't sure what was going to happen to her and Brian once they were not touring any more. She couldn't help but let her mind linger on what Ty had said about Brian just using her while they were on the road. But as she looked over at his smiling face, she knew that just wasn't the case. "Let's stop by F.A.O. Schwartz? I need to get a new watch battery before this one gives out all together. I've had to reset the blasted thing three times this past week."

Unlike most people who would dash into Walmart or Kmart to buy a new watch battery, Brian had to choose the most expensive jewelry store in town in which to purchase his. As he ushered into the elite shop, Jennifer couldn't help but chide him just a little bit. "Walmart would probably have the same one you're looking for at one tenth of the cost. Why come here when you know you're buying the name and not the battery?"

"Because I bought the watch at one of their stores," he informed her, "And I know they'll stock it." She shook her head at him as she followed him into the swank establishment. "Why don't you window shop while I see about the battery?" he suggested, waving her toward a display case.

"I don't know why I should," she replied in a low voice. "I couldn't afford to buy a speck of dirt off the floor in a place like this." But despite herself, Jennifer wandered around, peering into case after case, trying not to drool at the exquisite merchandise within the glass cases. 

"May I help you with anything?"

Jennifer glanced up at the saleslady. "No, thank you. I'm just looking."

Brian stepped up beside her. "See anything you like?"

"Sure," she admitted ruefully. "Just about everything I see."

Ever so casually, Brian steered her over to a case containing rings - solitaires, engagement rings, wedding sets - any and every kind imaginable. There he stopped and leaned an elbow on the counter, as if totally unaware of its contents. "It'll be just a few minutes to install the battery," he commented, looking around the place. "You don't mind waiting, do you?"

"No, that's okay," she said. She glanced down into the case on which he was leaning. "These are just beautiful."

Brian looked over at her, a smile crossing his face. It was working! "Wow!" he laughed. "Look at that one over there, is that a rock or what?" he asked, pointing to the one that stood in the far right corner.

Jennifer stepped closer. "They're all beautiful."

"Which one do you like the best?" he asked, offhandedly.

"Oh, I don't know," she said, shaking her head.

"Well, if you didn't have to worry about the price, which one would you choose?" he asked, hoping she's fall right into the game he was playing with her. 

She looked over them more carefully, nibbling on her lower lip. "That one," she said, pointing it out to him. She'd selected a round, brilliant-cut diamond of moderate size, flanked on either side by a smaller matching stone. All three gems were mounted over a brushed gold band.

"Out of all these?" he asked, his eyebrows lifting in surprise. "Remember, cost is no matter."

"It's perfect," she purred, peering through the glass at it. "Not too big, not too small. I mean, the center stone alone must be half a carat. And look at the way its cut. It reflects the light much better than some of these larger ones."

"She's absolutely correct," the saleslady agreed in her soft-spoken manner. "Your lady has impeccable taste," she offered, nodding at Jennifer. Jennifer stood upright, a smile spreading across her beautiful face. Unlocking the cabinet, she reached in and withdrew the ring Jennifer had selected. "You should try it for size."

"Oh no," Jennifer protested. "I shouldn't. It's not like I'm going to buy it."

"Just try it on," Brian pressed. "How many times in a day do you get to try on a rock like that." Jennifer smiled at him and slipped the ring on her finger, gazing down at the ring sparkling on her finger. Holding it at arm's length, she twisted her wrist this way and that, watching the light reflect off the beautiful stones. "It's absolutely beautiful," she sighed.

"Just like you," Brian whispered into her ear. She beamed up at him as he said, "You were right about it. Anything bigger wouldn't have looked right on your small finger."

"Absolutely," the woman concurred. "Except the band is about a half size too large. You want it snug enough that the setting won't slip off to the side."

Reluctantly, Jennifer removed the ring and handed it back. "It's lovely, but as I said, I'm just looking."

"Well, if you see anything else you'd like to examine more closely, let me know," she said, spotting another potential customer. "I'll be right over here."

Jennifer smiled in return as the gentleman that had waited on Brian motioned him to the other counter. Jennifer gave the ring one final covetous glance on her way to another display case, putting it firmly out of her mind. She was not about to torment herself with wanting something she couldn't have. Besides, if she was to get a ring like that, she was hoping it would come from Brian in the form of an engagement ring but she shook that idea as well. From the start her heart had overruled her head and any common sense she might have possessed had flown straight out of her head. Fool or not, god help her, she was utterly, irrevocably in love with the man standing across the room from her. 



Love's Harmony Ch. 14



At long last, Dallas was upon them and Jennifer was as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. She had sent her parents tickets, hoping they might just come but knew they probably wouldn't. They weren't really the type to come to a concert but she at least hoped to see them backstage. Pushing herself through the crowd, she came across Nick. "Hey," she said, grabbing a hold of his arm. "Have you seen Fatima?"

Nick turned to her, smiled and said, "Yeah. I think she was getting your parents something to drink. They were heading for the juice bar."

"Great! They're here!" she answered, stepping away from him, but before she took two steps he grabbed her arm, pulling her into his embrace. "Hey, what's this for?" she asked in surprise, hugging him back.

"I just wanted you to know how much we all think of you. You've been great on this tour and I just wanted you to know."

She took a step back, smiling at him. "Nick . . . I know it's the last show, but I'll still be around." She laughed and quickly kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks. You've always been there for me these past couple of months. I appreciate your friendship."

He smiled at her one last time as she continued on towards the juice bar. She really had to fight her way through the crowd. There was a big group backstage and she wondered if she'd ever get through. Just then, she felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned to find Howie grinning down at her. "Hey," she said, smiling back at him. "You look like the cat who swallowed the canary. What's going on?"

"Nothing," he said, pulling her into a bear hug.

She hugged him back. "Thanks," she said, surprised again at another show of affection from one of the band members. "What was that for?"

"I just wanted to thank you for everything you've done for us on this tour. I can't help but wonder how we got through the previous ones without you." He smiled down at her and for a moment, Jennifer wondered if something else was going on.

"Howie, that's so sweet. Thanks a lot," she said, kissing his cheek quickly. "I've got to go. My parents are here."

"I know," he said, releasing her. "They're great!"

"You've met them?" she said, incredulous.

"Yeah," he said, pointing over towards the juice bar. "Brian's introducing them to everyone."

"Brian?" she asked, incredulous again. How did he know what they even looked like? "Where are they?" she asked, quickly scanning the crowd.

"The last time I saw them, they were at the juice bar," he said grinning at her.

"Well," she said, stepping away from him. "I'll see you before the show."

She started off once more, surprised at Howie's revelation. Brian was introducing her parents to everyone. He must have run into Fatima with them, introductions being made that way. It didn't make a lot of sense for him to take on that responsibility and she couldn't help but be a little disappointed. She had wanted to be the one to introduce them to Brian. She wanted them to see that he felt the same way about her that she did about him.

She reached the juice bar, disappointment shining in her eyes as she found them nowhere to be seen near there. "Sam," she said, turning to the man behind the bar. "Have you seen Fatima or Brian?"

"Yeah," he said, grinning at her. He handed a juice to one of the customers that came up. "Fatima had some last minute things to do on stage and Brian's showing your parents around."

"You've seen them?" she asked.

"Yeah," he replied, pointing over to where A.J. stood with a small group of fans, signing autographs and posing for some pictures. "They were talking to A.J. last I saw them. He probably knows where they are."

"Thanks," she said, pushing away from the bar in the direction of A.J. When she reached him, he stepped away from the crowd and grabbed her hand.

"Just the person I've been looking for," he said, kissing her on the cheek.

"Have you seen my parents?" she asked, looking past him into the crowd.

"Uh . . . yeah," he said, looking behind him. "I think Brian took them to find Kevin." He turned back around to look at her. "You look great," he said, admiration shining in his dark eyes.

"Thanks," she said, smiling at him. "I have to go."

"Wait," he replied, not letting go of her hand. "I just wanted to let you know how much I've enjoyed getting to know you on this tour. You put up with my shit and I know that took a lot. I appreciate everything you've done . . . for the band, for me and . . . for B-Rok." He stopped for a moment as she looked at him, touched by his impassioned words. "Your friendship means a lot to me and you'll never know how much I respect you and what you've done."

She smiled at him, pulling him into her embrace. As she hugged him, she finally knew that they had come a long way and she was glad. All she ever wanted was for the two of them to be friends and now, finally, they had gotten there. "Alex, that means more to me than you'll ever know. Thank you," she whispered, all choked up. She pulled away from him, tears shining in her eyes. She smiled at him one last time as she pulled away to find Kevin and hopefully, her parents.

Spying Kevin at the other end of the concrete patio, she squeezed through the crowd, her eyes never leaving him. When she had almost reached him, he saw her, a wide grin breaking out on his face. "Jen!" he called, and then as she reached him, called back over his shoulder, "Brian! She's right here! Hey, B-Rok!" He turned back around, waving Brian and her parents over to where they stood. 

Jennifer smiled as she finally spotted them, squeezed Kevin's arm and then ran into her father's embrace, holding him close to her. So much had happened in so little time and she wasn't sure what to say. It seemed as if the years quickly slipped away as he held her close to him, because all of a sudden she was no longer Jennifer Matthews, publicity director for The Backstreet Boys, but Jennifer Matthews, daddy's little girl and she felt the tears spring into her eyes as she clung onto him. He pushed her gently away from him as his eyes sought hers. "My baby girl," he cooed and she hugged him tight to her again.

"Daddy ... " and then she left him for her mother's embrace. She quickly embraced her mother. "Oh, mom . . . it's so good to see you." She stepped back, looking at both of them. "I can't believe you're actually here."

"We wouldn't miss it," her mom said as her dad made a face. Her mother saw it and laughed. "Well, it took some convincing to get your father at a rock concert, but we're here."

"Not a rock concert," Brian interjected, coming over to take Jennifer's arm in his. She hugged him quickly, leaving her arms around his waist as his encircled her shoulders. "It's a blend of pop and R&B."

"Whatever," her father said, rolling his eyes. "It's loud, right?' Ty laughed, nodding his head. Looking at his daughter again, "I don't care if it's rap," he said, "As long as I get a chance to see you."

She smiled at them again and then turning to Brian, "What are you doing showing my parents around?" she asked. "And who introduced you to them?" She frowned at him a moment, feigning the best hurt look she could. "I wanted to do that!"

He smiled at her and she caught the look that passed between him and her father. She looked back at him for a moment, wondering what that was all about but Brian just smiled and said, "I figured out who they were. It wasn't that hard," he laughed, sweeping his hand around the crowd and she instantly knew what he meant. There weren't many people here over the age of thirty. 

Jennifer's mother interrupted, "Brian's been a doll." She smiled at him as she patted his arm. "I couldn't have chosen a better one myself," she said and Brian grinned. Jennifer felt that there was more going on here than anyone was saying but she let it go. She was just happy to see them all together and hearing her mother's approval meant her father liked him as well.

"Did ya'll get here okay?" Jennifer asked, wrapping her arms around her father once more as her eyes bore into his.

He reached down, squeezing her into his embrace. He planted a kiss on her forehead and said, "The traffic was awful," he admitted, raising his head and looking around them at the crowd of people in the small area they were using for their backstage pre-concert bash. "Do you have any idea how long it's been since I've been at a concert?" he asked, shaking his head. "This is crazy," and then looking down at her, "I must be crazy."

"I'm just glad you're here," she said, smiling up at him. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before turning to Brian. "I guess you've introduced them to everyone," she said, giving him a look of disappointment once again. 

"I'm sorry," he said, drawing her into his embrace. He hugged her to him and kissed her forehead. "I was so excited about seeing them myself, I guess I got over enthusiastic," he admitted. "Forgive me."

"There's nothing to forgive," Betty answered for her daughter. "You were a wonderful host. Jennifer always hated to do those kind of things."

"Mother," she said, sending her a warning glance. "Please don't tell Brian all my secrets."

"You mean there's more?" he teased her as she playfully punched him in the ribs. 

Jennifer was real nervous about the concert. She wanted this one to go off without a hitch. And for some reason, she kept hoping that Brian wouldn't pull another stunt like he had in New York. Being this close to home and near him made her nervous. But she also wanted her parents to love Brian and The Backstreet Boys and just overall, her job. The guys were pumped up and were giving the performance of a lifetime. Everyone was swept up into their enthusiasm and the energy that radiated from the stadium was overwhelming!

As the concert got closer and closer to the final performance, she could sense a sort of anticipation that radiated from the guys, like they were planning something special for their finale and she wondered what they had up their sleeve. She couldn't pinpoint anything in particular, but every time they came off for a costume change, they shot her certain looks and she just felt that something was going on. 

During their last costume change she grabbed hold of Howie. She could usually pry the truth out of him when no one else would budge. "What's up?" she asked him, her hand on his arm as he came backstage.

"What?" he repeated, smiling at her.

"What's going on?" she asked, looking him in the eye. "You guys are up to something. I can tell."

"What gives you that idea?" he said, starting to laugh.

"Howie," she began, but he just shook his head and kissed on the cheek.

"You'll see," was all she could pry out of him. As they were lining up to go back out on the stage, she looked up to see all eyes on her and she stepped towards them. "What?!" she almost screamed. This was eating her up! But all they did was break into soft laughter as they strode back onto stage.

Suddenly Jim, her publicity director from the record company, was standing beside her. She looked up and almost fell over. "Jim! Oh my god! What are you doing here?!" she said in amazement, stepping towards him as he wrapped her up in a big bear hug.

"Jennifer, you look great!" he said, looking her over as he held her arm's length. 

"Thanks!" she said, beaming up at him. And then, "You didn't answer my question. What are you doing here?" And then suddenly she put two and two together. She turned her head, looking out onto stage and then turned her head back towards Jim. "What's going on?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said, shaking his head at her. "It's the last concert, last stop, and I wanted to come catch the show."

"Dallas is a long way from Orlando," she said, not sure she believed what he was saying. "We'll be home in two days."

"I know," he said, smiling at her. "But you're not performing in Orlando. You're performing in Dallas." He watched her for a moment, knowing she doubted every word that was coming out of his mouth. "Just relax and enjoy the show," he said, draping an arm around her shoulder. "This is going to be great." She eyed his one last time at that last remark. There was definitely something going on . . . she just wasn't sure what it was!

She could tell the last number was coming up because the crew were all running around, getting the fireworks and special lighting for the last number. They usually sang a fast song for their last number, hence the fireworks. She was surprised when the music stopped right before their last number and the lights came up a little more on the guys. 'Here it goes, whatever it is,' she thought to herself. Looking over at Jim, she said, "They're up to something, but I don't know what it is." She chewed on her thumbnail nervously, wondering what the hell they were up to. "I hope they don't do something really stupid." She hadn't meant for her thoughts to come out orally and was surprised to hear herself saying them.

"Don't worry," Jim said, smiling down at her. "They're professionals. Let them do their job." She looked over at him, feeling a little bit better. If Jim wasn't worried, then she was going to try to relax about it as well.

"How y'all doin' out there?" Kevin called out over the mike. He was answered by thunderous applause and screaming. Jennifer couldn't help but smile. They had made it! They had really made it and it made her beam! Despite all her reservations and the problems they had faced, The Backstreet Boys had come out on top and she had found a new life! 

"We're going to do something a little different tonight," Kevin explained. "So we just want y'all to hang with us." Then he handed the mike over to Brian as the crowd sounded their approval. Whatever it was they were planning, the crowd was willing to go along with it.

Suddenly, Jennifer recognized the music that she had heard the band working on for the past couple of weeks. It was the same song that Brian had sung to her that night on the bus. She was surprised they would introduce a new song on the last night of their tour, and their final song at that! As the music swelled and the crowd swayed in tempo, she couldn't help but smile. This was a beautiful song.

She saw the guys walking around on the stage, switching places as Brian took his place in the middle and front. He had the solo lead on this song. She smiled at the words . . . "Don't pretend you're sorry, I know you're not. You know you've got the power to make me weak inside. And girl you leave me breathless, but it's okay ... 'Cuz you are my survival, now hear me say ... " And then the rest of the group fell in harmony and Jennifer smiled at the reaction the crowd gave them. They loved it!

After this first verse, A.J. turned to where Jennifer stood with Jim on the wings of the stage, out of sight. Jennifer was too busy watching Brian until Jim nudged her, saying, "I think you're wanted on stage."

Jennifer turned to look at him. "What did you say?" she said, suddenly feeling A.J.'s hand grasping her own. "What . . .?" She turned, imploring Jim with her eyes. 

"Go on," he said, smiling at her. Only then did she relax and follow A.J. out onto stage, her hand clasped in his. The crowd went crazy, throwing things onto stage like teddy bears, roses, whatever they could get their hands on. Jennifer stopped, picking up one of the teddy bears in her hand before A.J. deposited her before Brian, his eyes boring into hers.

"And every time I breathe I take you in and my heart beats again. Baby I can't help it, you keep me drowning in your love." She smiled at him as his hand came out to clasp hers and she heard the rest of the band singing in the background. "And every time I try to rise above, I'm swept away by love ... Baby, I can't help it. You keep me drowning in your love." The rest of song was spent right at the front of the stage, Brian singing directly to Jennifer. She would smile at him and then look out into the audience, surprised at the encouragement she felt and heard throughout the song. This was okay! They had accepted the fact that Brian was taken and not given it another thought. They still loved The Backstreet Boys and Jennifer breathed a sigh of relief.

As the song ended, Brian leaned over and kissed her as the crowd went crazy. "I love you," he mouthed to her and she smiled.

Suddenly Nick was there, standing beside them as the rest of the band made a half circle around Jennifer and Brian. Looking out into the crowd, he said, "Y'all have been great Dallas!" Once again the crowd went crazy and Jennifer waited for the fireworks to go off, signaling the end of the concert, but they didn't and the crowd was going crazy. It was if they sensed something else was going to happen as well. 

Then she heard A.J. tell the crowd, "We have one last surprise up our sleeve!" and the crowd answered with a loud cheer. "We need it quiet first," he announced as the rest of the band used their hands to quiet down the crowd. Eventually it did get quieter but every once in a while you could hear someone yell out that they loved Nick or A.J. or the whole band. 

Suddenly Brian turned towards her, his hand caressing hers and her heart skipped a beat at the look he gave her. She clutched onto the teddy bear still in her hand as he brought her hand to his lips. The auditorium stood quiet, watching the drama unfold before them like a scene out of a movie. He was still wearing his headset from the concert so everyone in the auditorium could hear every word he said. "I love you Jennifer Matthews," he said, his lips caressing her hand. 

She could hear a muffled mutter whisper across the crowd as her heart caught in her throat. "Brian, what are you doing?" she whispered.

"What am I doing?" he repeated for the audience's sake. "I'm laying my heart in your hands. You want the stars? I'll get them for you." He pointed towards the top of the auditorium. "Just say the word Jen, and I'll give you anything." 

"You spoil me terribly, Brian," she said, tears forming in her eyes.

"There's only one thing I ask in return," he said, suddenly bending down on one knee and the crowd erupted. Jennifer's heart skipped a beat. Did this mean what she hoped it did? He let go of her hand temporarily as he reached into his pocket, extracting a small velvet box. As he opened it, her hand fluttered to her mouth. Nestled inside the velvet box was the same exquisite ting she had chosen at the Houston jewelers. Plucking the ring from its nest, Brian reached for Jennifer's left hand once more. "Marry me, Jen. I love you more than I've ever loved any other woman, or ever will again. You're that other half of me that's been missing all these years, and now that I've found you, I don't want to ever lose you. Please say you'll be my wife." The crowd's thunderous applause drowned out any answer Jennifer might have had at that moment.

The teddy bear that Jennifer had been holding suddenly dropped to the floor as he hand flew to her chest, as if to keep her racing heart from leaping free. "Oh god, Brian!" she breathed. "I love you with all my heart and every fiber of my being!" The tears that had been filling her eyes suddenly swept down her cheeks as Brian slipped the ring onto her hand. 

"Then, you'll marry me?" he repeated, not sure he understood her the first time.

"Oh, yes!" she declared, her eyes glowing with joy. He'd scarcely slipped the ring onto her finger as she launched herself at him, her arms flying around his neck. His headset screeched in protest and he reached up, flinging it to the ground as his arms went around her, in her hair. He kissed her quivering lips, tenderly and lingeringly as the crowd roared their approval.



Love's Harmony Ch. 15



Jennifer turned at the knock on her door. "Can I come in?" Don Matthews asked, peering around the corner of the door, smiling at his daughter.

"I've been waiting for you," she said, smiling at him. As he stepped full into the room, closing the door behind him, Jennifer turned, giving him the full view of her in her wedding gown and it took his breath away.

"You look beautiful," he whispered, standing in awe of her beauty.

"No bad news this time, I hope," she said, her eyes glued to his.

"No sweetheart," he said, crossing over to where she stood, tears blurring his vision. "The bad times are finally behind you baby. Only good times are ahead of us now."

She smiled at him, taking him into her embrace, snuggling close against his chest as she closed her eyes. Her last fear put to rest she could finally focus on the future . . . a future filled with Brian. "I love you daddy," she said, fighting back the tears in her eyes.

"I don't know if I can do this," he said, still holding her to him.

"Yes you can," she said, smiling at his words. "I'm just changing my last name. I'll still be your little girl."

He hugged her close to him once again, not sure he could give her away after all that had happened to her. All he wanted to do was hold onto her. In his mind, she was still that little girl that he watched saying her prayers every night . . . still that little girl that he had to walk beside as she took her first steps . . . still that little girl trying on perfume and make-up for the very first time. He stood back from her, his eyes just watching as they stood alone in the bride's room. "A penny for your thoughts," Jennifer said, a smile in her eyes.

"I'm not sure," he answered honestly. "I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl ..." Jennifer leaned into him once more, kissing him on the cheek.

A knock on the door told them it was time and Jennifer looked up at her father, all the love and respect she had for him shining in her luminous blue eyes. "Walk me down the aisle, daddy." He took her arm as the unshed tears shined in his eyes. "Daddy . . . don't you dare cry," she teased him. "If you break down, I won't be able to do it." He patted her hand and looked forward.

The ceremony was simple, solemn, sincere. The guest list had been pared to the bare minimum, yet the church was packed beyond capacity. Betty clutched at her husband, Don's hand, mopping her tears with the handkerchief wadded in the other. Across the aisle, Brian's mother held her hand to her chest, her emotions running high. Beside her, Jim Coleman gazed intently toward the altar.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife," the pastor said, smiling down at the couple standing before him. "You may kiss your bride."

Brian drew Jennifer into his arms and kissed her with all the love and longing in his heart. Jennifer melted against him, her happy heartbeats matching his. When at last they parted, to gaze adoringly into each other's eyes, the minister was announcing proudly, "May I be the first one to present to those of you assembled here today . . . Mr. and Mrs. Brian Littrell." Jennifer turned to see her mother burst into tears as her father winked at her. She had finally made it to the altar without a hitch and better yet, she was now married to the man of her dreams.

Just as she thought the wedding over and her marriage would begin, the rest of The Backstreet Boys joined them at the altar as Brian turned to face her, a microphone in his hand. Jennifer's eyes misted over with tears, knowing what was to come now. As soft guitar music began playing and the guys swayed in time to the music, Brian's eyes bore into hers as he began singing. "Beautiful you are, compassionate is she ... you have made me what I am, she's all I hope to be. The world, it lies in you ... fulfilling all my dreams. She is my dream come true."

Jennifer closed her eyes as her heart whispered over and over that this was real. She was married to Brian and he loved her . . . truly, deeply, eternally. "And in just two words ... my destiny 'cause you are everything. Everything my heart could ever imagine and everything you are." Jennifer opened her eyes to watch him once more, knowing that no matter what, she and Brian would stay together. They belonged together . . . At the end of the song, as the crowd burst into tears or applause and really a combination of both, Brian handed the mike over to his best man, Nick and swept Jennifer into his arms, brushing his mouth over hers as the crowd cheered.