2 comments/ 13365 views/ 5 favorites After All Ch. 01 By: After All Ch. 01 Thursday came and Jessica entered the apartment with apprehension. As before, he buzzed her up and left the door open. She came in and looked at his bedroom door for a few seconds, unsure of what to do. She had spent far too much time during the week remembering his touch and fierce gaze. She had felt a conflicting mix of fear and curiosity and couldn't stop wondering about what he wrote, what he thought, who he was... what he and Jen had done together. Most ex's didn't get into costume to have sex with each other. It was distracting her while she sat in class and she even started writing out scenarios in her notebook. It was mainly just dialog where she somehow convinced him to tell her about the woman in the photos or why he wrote what he did. It was clearly erotic fiction, and it also happened to be one of her secret obsessions. She desperately wanted to know if he had written anything she had read. She especially wanted to know if he had written anything she had gotten herself off on while reading. It had happened, although rarely. She had become convinced he had been the author of some of her on-line favorites and had reread them while she masturbated, searching for any sign of him in the words. She couldn't tell, and she needed to read more of his writing. She cleaned the apartment with time to spare and felt courage welling up within her. I've cleaned enough, she thought as her mind focused on investigating his writing. She walked over to the door and knocked. "Yes?" "It's me. I've finished in here and wanted to know if there's anything in there you want me to clean." It was a line from one of her scenarios, but she felt she spoke it believably. "Come in." Jessica opened the door and saw him sitting at his desk near the window. He turned in his chair and looked at her. He didn't say anything. "Maybe I could empty the trash and put some of your clothes in the laundry basket," she said as she pulled the small plastic bag from his wastebasket. She didn't do laundry for him, but she always threw any towels or clothes she found into the hamper by his back door. She had explored once and knew it led down a staircase to the basement where the washing machines were. "That would be fine, Jessica. Thank you." She emptied his trashcan into the larger trash bin in the kitchen and put his clothes in the hamper. She even emptied his overflowing ashtrays and gathered up the empty bottles and placed them near the front door so she could take them to the recycling bin. While she cleaned, her mind sorted through the scenarios she had planned, but she couldn't work up the nerve to execute any of them. She started to straighten his bed, unsure what she should do next or how she could ask him if she could read his story. "What do you study?" She almost jumped as he addressed her. She was on the bed on her hands and knees and trying to pull the corner of the sheets tight against the wall. Her head turned around to look at him. Her ass was facing him and his eyes moved slowly from staring at it to look at her face. Her heart raced as she could feel his gaze move over her body. She held her position and simply said, "Business... and Film." Dan's eyes darted to hers and his brow furrowed a bit. "Double major?" he asked. "Yeah," she answered as she turned to face him and sat on her left hip on the bed with her left hand supporting herself. She knew she was posing for him, but it excited her. Maybe she wanted him to be impressed and write her into one of his stories. Maybe she just wanted him to remember her like this. She didn't really know. "I want to write screenplays someday, but I can't depend on that for a job or anything." She smiled at him and he smiled back. "You're brighter than you let on. That's probably good in a woman as good looking as you." Jessica felt a rush in her cheeks and couldn't believe she was blushing. She certainly knew she was attractive and had grown used to the drunken come-ons in clubs and bars from guys who somehow thought it would impress her if they told her how hot she was. For some reason, Dan's statement was uttered as a simple fact, completely undisguised with no ulterior motive seeping through. "Why?" she finally managed to ask. "Because beautiful women have a curse hidden in the blessing of their looks. All men, and most women, will assume you are simply going to use your physical assets to get the things you need or want out of life. They'll accept you at face value, because they can't force themselves to look beyond your face. Keep your intelligence hidden, and you'll always have an advantage over them." Jessica stared at his dark eyes and couldn't move. He had said something she had only just begun to understand for herself and her mind gathered it up and tried desperately to save it, word-for-word, in her brain. She couldn't really wrap her mind around it at the moment, but she knew it was something she needed to keep and carry with her. She yearned to ask him right then to read his writing, but she still couldn't bring herself to do it. "Do you read erotica, Jessica?" "Yes," she said slowly and with only a slight hesitation. He was going to do it. He was going to bring her out and invite her in. Her heart filled with gratitude, and a part of her rebelled against this submissive yielding. That part, the side that pushed away amorous drunks and boldly flirted with cute shy boys, was falling silent in wonder at the presence of this man. If he told her in his matter-of-fact manner that he needed to study the body of a college-aged woman for the story he was working on, she would strip off her clothes and pose as seductively as possible for him. That thought started to make her wet. "Since you're a film student, maybe you can read over this latest chapter for me and give me some feedback. My agent is a greasy nut-job who only wants to pimp my work out to whatever magazine needs some content. I can't trust his opinion at all. I'm trying to write something bigger than erotica." Jessica had already left the bed and came to stand near him, her eyes searching the computer screen. She felt herself bend over his shoulder, but it was only to get as close to his words as possible. "I want it to be something important," he finished saying as he pushed the chair back and got up and held it for her. She sat down and he pushed her in closer to the desk, like some old-fashioned gentleman. She saw that he had scrolled the document up to the top of the chapter. She hardly noticed him gently stroke her hair once and whisper "thank you" before stepping away. Her eyes began to devour the words in front of her. The chapter seemed like an early one, but it was hard to tell, since he hadn't labeled them yet. She resisted the urge to explore his documents folder to find the absolute beginning and simply read what was open in front of her. A man and a woman, recently divorced, met at the coffee shop where they had had their first date. The conversation was stilted at first. She had remarried, apparently to someone older and richer than the man, judging by his thoughts. He wasn't sure what she wanted by this meeting, but couldn't resist seeing her again, because he had never stopped loving and missing her. She guessed they had been through some trouble together, more than the usual among divorcees, but it wasn't clear. Jessica was frustrated that she couldn't read the beginning and was about to ask Dan if she could when her eyes started on the next passage. The woman stated bluntly that she needed him to fuck her. She had missed his hands and words and powerful lust. She wanted him to take her any way he pleased. Her new husband was nice and loving, but he made love like a 14-year old boy who had never seen a hardcore porn movie. The man's lust overcame him and he found himself ordering her to go outside to the back of the coffee shop and put her hands on the dumpster and wait for him there. Jessica's eyes filtered the story faster as she her heart rate increased and her pussy moistened. She wanted to reach down and unzip her jeans and stroke her enlarged clit, but she resisted, aware Dan was seated on the bed, looking at her. She concentrated on the feeling in her sex and continued to read. The man exited a few minutes after the woman and he found her in the back, positioned exactly as he had told her. There was a high embankment on that side of the building and only a couple of other shops in the small strip mall, so it was unlikely they would be seen, but it was a risk nonetheless. The man talked dirty to the woman, telling her that what she really wanted was to be treated like a filthy whore as his hands raised her skirt and stroked her ass and pulled aside her panties. He spanked her viciously for being so bad and Jessica could not resist putting a hand down next to her crotch and lightly stroking herself through her jeans. The man forced her to bend all the way over so her head rested against the side of the garbage dumpster as he pulled her panties down to her ankles. He held her hands behind her back as he ruthlessly fucked her pussy. The woman yelled and moaned loudly in ecstasy, like she hadn't enjoyed a good fuck in ages. The man forced her to strip completely naked and made her get down on hands and knees beside the stinking garbage. He then grasped her ass cheeks and spread them wide and spit on her asshole. He rubbed it with his thumb and spit some more. The woman was moaning and begging for him to fuck her. He pressed his cock into her wet little asshole and forced it in as his hands pushed her face down on the dirty pavement. He began to fuck her hard in her ass and the woman screamed and her nails scratched and broke on the concrete as she felt his large cock borough into her butt. The man came inside of her clenching sphincter violently and with a roar of conquest. He then shoved her down as he stood up and cruelly uttered that he was done with her as he zipped up his pants. He walked away and the woman stared after him as he disappeared around the corner. She whispered, "I miss you." Jessica forced herself to stop her hand from rubbing and she glanced at Dan out of the corner of her eye. She placed her hands on the desk and tried to prepare some kind of critical feedback for him. She tried to think of structure and continuity and detail and dialog, but all that came out was, "Can I read the beginning?" "Did you like it?" "Yes," she breathed out as she looked from his face to the computer screen and back again. "What did you like?" He was calm and intense at the same time. "They're like two lovers that don't know how to be together and yet can't resist each other." The words came pouring out of Jessica. She was thrilled at how much this simple chapter inspired and provoked her. "They're old and young at the same time. It's like they know each other's minds but still need to explore each other's limits in some effort to control the desires they have." She sighed and almost laughed at how gushing her appraisal sounded. She did laugh. "And the ass fucking was hot, too." Dan smiled and actually laughed a bit as well. "Good." He paused and studied her face. "I could tell it turned you on." "Yes," she answered without looking at him. She wasn't sure what to do next. He hadn't said it was all right for her to read anything else. "Do you really want to read more?" "Yes!" she exclaimed in an expressive sigh. "I want to see you feel comfortable while you read. I want to see how an anonymous reader out there takes in my work." Jessica wanted to read more, but now she was unsure what he was asking. Dan rose and stood beside her. He placed his hands lightly on her shoulders. "Jessica. I just want to see how a woman enjoys my words. Please. I won't interfere. Just read and let your self go. If you can't, then I'll know I have some more revisions to do and you can help me with it. If, however, you feel the need to touch yourself, I only want to know when it happens -- what thing I wrote that triggered it. I'll be right here, but I won't make a move or a sound until you're ready to talk. All right?" Dan bent over her and moved the mouse to close out the current chapter and opened the master document that held the full story. Jessica felt herself nodding. There was a part of her mind that was letting go of something, but she could no longer tell what it was or why it was ever important. She started reading the full story and she could feel him gradually pull away to sit or stand behind her. She had no idea what he was doing, but she felt his presence and read his words and soon was submitting to the moment that surrounded her. When she masturbated, she usually liked to keep her panties and bra on, for the feel of constriction they provided. She unbuttoned her blouse and took it off and then rose up in the chair and unzipped and took off her jeans. Her matching blue bra and panties immediately excited Dan, but she didn't care that he was watching her. Maybe she liked that he was watching her, but she was too focused on the story to try to sort it out. She feasted on the words on the screen and felt them invade her mind and twist it until it could think of nothing else but achieving orgasm. She kicked her left leg up on the desk and slipped her left hand beneath her panties to massage her swollen and wet pussy lips. She read about the furious lovemaking between the doomed couple, the torrid situations they put each other in and the terrible betrayals they acted out on one another. While she was reading a passage that described the main character holding the woman's arms up against a bookcase and finger fucking her from behind, Jessica could no longer contain what she was feeling. The words set her on fire and she stood up and turned around to face him. "All of it," she said. "Every part makes me want to touch myself." She could no longer control the words that flooded her mind and made her spin around as they sank deep into her lust and leapt out of her throat. She breathed a few short deep breaths and moved in front of the bookcase that separated the desk from the bed. She couldn't believe what she was doing but was sure she didn't want to stop. Dan leaned against the dresser on the opposite wall and watched her. Jessica reached up with her right hand and grabbed a shelf as her left hand continued to caress her clit. She closed her eyes and imagined herself as the woman in the story and she turned around and bent her ass out to Dan. She desperately wanted to show him what his words did to her. Dan saw her hand working her pussy under her panties and her arm stretched above her in support. He moved to stand close behind her. "Tell me what you want," he said. She heard his voice and some part of her mind had been waiting for him to ask. "I want you to write my scene. I want you to tell me how I cum," she moaned as she rubbed her clit furiously. "Take off your bra and panties." Jessica pulled them off without hesitation and placed her hands back where they were. She could not control her body any longer. She wanted to be Dan's model, a woman who showed him how women get off. She also wanted him to tell her how to get off, and the terribly contrasting ideas made her grip the bookcase tight and wait for his next word. Instead of a word, she heard a buzzing and her eyes widened as Dan pressed some vibrating toy in her pussy lips. Jessica gasped and moaned. He rubbed it up and down her wet folds and pressed it firmly to her eager clit. She closed her eyes and reached up with both hands and gripped the shelf above her and surrendered control. "Maybe your hands can do it, maybe they can't, but I find a vibrator usually hits the spots better than any man's fumbling fingers or dick." Jessica wanted to tell him he was putting it in just fine, but instead she felt him take her left hand off the shelf and use it to replace his own hand on the vibrator. He held her wrist for a second or two. "Take it and hold it where it wants to go." Jessica took hold of the vibrating egg and held it along her wet pussy lips and pressed it up against her clit. She was holding it behind her and her other arm stretched and complained from her posture. She tried to withdraw her hand to move it between her legs from under her stomach, but yelped when something hard smacked her ass. "Stay as you were," Dan's calm and neutral voice landed on her. She had no idea what had hit her, but her cunt throbbed from it and her ass cheeks burned. She had been spanked before and had enjoyed it in a playful way, but what had struck across her ass cheeks had been severe and measured; serious and disciplined. Her knees weakened, but she stayed standing, wanting to show him she was ready for any instruction. She hurriedly reached behind and began massaging her clit again. Her hand dropped down one shelf and she leaned over further, arching her ass out more. Dan pushed the vibrator to maximum and dropped the controller onto the small of her back. She could feel the plastic controller slap on her skin and could sense him retreat a few steps. She realized she was just a toy fucking itself for his amusement. She desperately wanted to turn her head and watch him watch her, but she forced herself to keep her head down and still. "Keep going, Jessica. Show me how much the words make you need to get off. Show me how much you are a slave to your own body. Let it take control. Let it take you places your mind won't let you go." Jessica whined softly and shoved the vibrator around her wet cunt. Dan stared at her beautiful full, round ass as it trembled before him. The fingers of her left hand reached around her cheeks and pressed the vibrating egg against her wanting clit, as her other hand grasped desperately onto the shelf above her head. Jessica spread her legs wider and tried to show him her dripping pussy lips and make him feel the intense lust that was coursing through her. If he wanted to fuck her, she'd let him. At the back of her mind was Tim's face, buried deep and staring at her. She squeezed her eyes shut tighter and told herself this was just something she needed to explore and then she could be with him again, fully and honestly. She wanted to know what it was about this man and his writing that excited her so much. She needed an answer to everything that was pushing and seeking out of her. If she could only just find it, she could bring it to Tim and he could- CRACK! Her ass stung and burned again and her eyes watered. "You relaxed and started to release. I never told you to do that," Dan said evenly. Jessica looked behind her to see him and try to explain, but instead she saw him lift a leather belt and whip it across her bottom. She yelled in pain and closed her eyes and ducked her head. "Sorry! I'm so sorry! I'll be good from now on!" She heard herself saying the words, but couldn't really believe it was her saying them. There was a small part of herself that was horrified by what she was doing, and what she was letting him do to her, and kept telling her to stop and get dressed and leave. She wanted to regain control of herself, but she also wanted Dan to take over her actions and write her in and out of all of this. "Turn around and face me," he commanded. Jessica straightened and grabbed the vibrator's controller as it dropped off her ass. She turned and looked at him and kept the egg pressed against her clit. He moved in close to her and she felt her back press against the bookcase. His lips approached hers and she had a fleeting thought of denying him a kiss for Tim's sake, but then his head turned down and she could feel his teeth sink into her neck. He nibbled and licked and sucked from her collarbone up to her left ear lobe and she sighed heavily and pressed the vibrator close to her clit. That's when she felt the fingers of his right hand squeeze her left butt cheek, right where it met her thigh and where his belt had stung her. She gasped and could feel her pussy lips open wide in supplication. His left hand grabbed her throat and squeezed lightly and forced her face to look up. He pushed her head back against the shelf and brought his face close to her lips. Jessica opened her mouth and her knees felt like jelly and her legs begged to sink down. He was practically holding her up by her throat, but not in strangulation. After All Ch. 01 Dan's lips brushed her cheeks and glided over her mouth. His breath reeked of cigarettes and alcohol, but still she tried to arch up to take his kiss. He kept her held steady and denied her need. His right hand released her ass and moved slowly over her hips and up her quivering stomach to rest between her heaving breasts. They were full and beautiful and firm and Dan admired them as he held her up. Jessica pushed the vibrator up hard on her clit as he pinned her and inspected her body. She could feel the rising swell of excitement in her pussy lips as she submitted to being Dan's new doll. Just a pretty thing for him to play with, she thought madly to herself. She had never wanted to be so used in her life and almost wanted to sob out the joy of it. Dan released her throat and used both hands to grasp her pink, hard nipples. He twisted and pinched them severely as he pressed himself against her shaking body. "AAAHHH!" Jessica yelled out with pain and desire. "You're a toy, Jessica," Dan muttered in a low and even voice, almost reading her mind. "You're just a pretty little toy, with pretty little buttons and knobs." He savagely twisted her nipples again and pushed hard against her tits and Jessica felt her back slam against the bookcase. A couple of books fell out and crashed to the floor and she cried out again and felt the wave of orgasm start to push over the seawall of her restraint. "You need only for someone to pull your string and you'll sing." He dropped his right hand to her pussy and pushed two fingers up inside of her as his index finger stretched out and touched her asshole. The other hand he used to grasp her face again and hold it still while he kissed her open and silently screaming mouth. "FFFUUUCK!" She yelled into his lips as she came and crashed and tried to sink, only to be held up by his large, strong hands. There was another wave that pushed over her as she shuddered and a last smaller one that fell down to her toes and seemed to stay and sit there in a tingling puddle. Dan removed his hands gently and pulled her to him in an embrace. Jessica's head rested on his shoulder as he held her and she wanted to sleep. It was the most terrific orgasm she had ever had and it had wiped her out. Again, as if reading her mind, or probably just body language, Dan reached down and scooped her up off her feet and carried her to the bed. She was about to try to rouse herself and give him some kind of reason why she couldn't sleep with him -- mostly because she was just exhausted -- when she felt him put blankets over her and cover her naked body. His hand caressed her cheek and he kissed her forehead. "Get some rest. I'll be right here," he said and then returned to his desk. Jessica's eyes watered and she almost reached out to him, but the blankets were so warm and the tingling in her toes had mellowed and spread a delightful sensation to the rest of her. She slept. Jessica's eyes opened and she blinked several times before she could remember where she was. The bedroom had grown dark, except for some bright glow coming from somewhere below her feet. She remembered everything that had happened and slowly pushed the blankets aside. The glow was coming from the computer monitor as Dan sat there staring at it and occasionally tapping something out on the keyboard. He looked miserable. The harsh light from the screen aged him some ten or fifteen years and the sadness she had seen weeks ago was fully present on his face. He rested his cheek in a hand that also gripped a cigarette while the other moved and danced slowly over the keyboard. His expression never changed and Jessica had the impression of him as some kind of bored pianist, just trying out different notes and hoping if he just gets one string right, he could maybe sleep tonight. She watched him, but he didn't seem to notice her. "Do you know why a man and a woman can't stay together?" He asked the computer screen. Jessica suddenly knew he was really addressing her, had known she was awake probably since she first moved. She propped herself up on her left arm and held the blanket over her breasts. She looked at him for a few seconds before responding. "I'm not sure..." "Because it's just easier not to." His voice sounded strange - slightly drunk and terribly sad. She didn't know what to say, but he waited patiently. "I don't think it has to be that way," she said after a long pause. "I used to think so, too... Used to think it was worth the struggle... Now..." Jessica felt awful and contemplated leaving, but she dismissed the emotion and focused on his pained expression. She couldn't fathom how to bring him out of his misery, but she knew how to distract him at least. He had let her read his writing and had brought her to an ecstasy she didn't know existed before. She knew she didn't want him to fuck her, not like this, but she had to reach out and tell him how wonderful his gifts were, what they meant to her. She withdrew the blanket and slid off the bed. She held her nude body slightly arched to display her breasts and walked slowly over to him. He watched her from the corner of his eye and snubbed out his cigarette. She came to stand beside him and reached out, purely by instinct, and ran her left hand through his hair. He pinched his eyes shut and breathed out sharply through his nose. "Just go," he whispered. "I don't want you here." Jessica heard the lie in his words and caressed his soft hair and pulled her nails along his scalp. He leaned his head against her hand and asked her to leave again, but this time with no conviction at all. Jessica placed the index finger of her other hand on his lips. "Shhh," she whispered. "Just relax. Let it go for a little while. Just for a bit." Dan groaned and he tried to sit up. Jessica reacted by leaning over him and kissing his lips. He let her kiss him for a second, then lightly pushed her away. He wished he could stand up, but doubted he could manage it. "You're beautiful, Jessica, and any man would be crazy to refuse your affection, but the next time you want to kiss me, I need it to be because you want me, not because you feel sorry for me. You understand?" Jessica nodded. She didn't mean to pity him, but she couldn't think of the right way to say it. Instead, she simply touched his face and smiled and said, "I'll see you Sunday." Then she put on her clothes, took some time in the bathroom adjusting her appearance and quietly left the apartment. It was 10:30, but she didn't think either her roommate or Tim would question her coming home a little late. She wasn't expecting him that night and her roommate largely kept to herself. Still, even if Tim paid her a surprise visit, she was sure she could shoo him away by claiming she needed to study, which she did. She had cheated on a couple of boyfriends in high school, but that was different. Everyone seemed to be doing it and she was never very sure how she felt about the guys she dated, so it didn't bother her too much. Even though she wasn't sure this was cheating at all, it still bothered her. Tim was different. She loved him more than she had loved anyone yet. She concentrated on the train tracks as she waited for the subway and gave herself over a little to self-loathing. Tim would never understand if he found out... Jessica wasn't sure she understood it either. She calmed her worry with the thought that the next time she was there, she would have the same kind of control she had tonight. She could simply clean the apartment and never knock on his door. Or, she thought as she felt a tingle stir in some mysterious corner of her libido, she could choose to enter and close the door and give herself over to his command.