1
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Hey, just drop them by to drop off these books I borrowed, I finished the last one.

2
00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:15,000
No, I didn't need to drop them off right now, I was on my way to the store and I just thought

3
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:21,040
I'd stop, you know, kill two birds in the bush, so okay, bye.

4
00:00:21,040 --> 00:00:26,800
I am a terrible fucking liar, will you let me in now?

5
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:32,160
Well, if you answered your texts or emails.

6
00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:33,160
You know what?

7
00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:36,840
Honestly, if you'd answered them, I'd still have dropped by on a flimsy excuse, but I

8
00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:45,880
wouldn't have been so worried, so let's sit on the couch, okay?

9
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:54,560
Something is definitely fucking wrong, never seen you this quiet, I know you can be shy

10
00:00:54,560 --> 00:01:01,000
and that's kind of adorable, but we've known each other for years.

11
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:05,160
It's not fine, it's the opposite, so what is it?

12
00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:06,160
What is it really?

13
00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:07,160
You got a text?

14
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:08,160
Can I read it?

15
00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:24,480
Oh my god, oh my god, that is not okay, yeah, I hugged you, why are you so surprised?

16
00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:35,480
It's true, I don't hug a lot, but it's you and this is just fucked, yes, yes, getting

17
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:41,640
dumped by a text is a pretty fucking shitty, and then sending a nearly nude selfie posing

18
00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:52,760
with the dude she's leaving you for, that's just fucking awful, ugh.

19
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You must be thinking of some other friend, because you know that I wouldn't let you be

20
00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:10,440
alone right now, you should know at least, wait, so, so because your girlfriend, who

21
00:02:10,440 --> 00:02:15,440
just dumped you in the most fucking tasteless way, would have told you to man up and deal

22
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with it, that means I have to leave you alone with your shitty thoughts?

23
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No.

24
00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:30,600
You heard me, no.

25
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First of all, I never approved of your decision to go exclusive with her, and she was a bougie

26
00:02:37,220 --> 00:02:44,320
brat who didn't want to be involved with you beyond what you could do for her, yes, I had

27
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veto power, but I was not consulted, and that's in the best friend constitution, I feel my

28
00:02:51,520 --> 00:03:00,920
rights were ignored in your haste to get laid, it's good to hear you laugh at least, now

29
00:03:00,920 --> 00:03:06,640
normally you would have made me laugh multiple times with your lame ass dad jokes, I guess,

30
00:03:06,640 --> 00:03:09,280
it's my turn.

31
00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:14,000
Second of all, once she said that shit about you manning up, you should have called me

32
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:18,880
to meet, yes, you should have called me so I could knock her ass out, obviously, you'd

33
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never do it, so it's up to me, the best friend, and thirdly, she's like the worst example

34
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of how to be a girlfriend, specifically, she was like the worst possible person to be your

35
00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:41,760
girlfriend, yes, well, I know you, I know exactly what you need in this situation, a

36
00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:48,080
smack upside the head, figuratively this time, yeah, see, I would have seen that look in

37
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your eyes, you get when you get all stoic, and also the way you purse your lips, yes,

38
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yes, that, exactly, that, tells me you're extremely sad, and what you need is hugs,

39
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and probably sex, yes, please, sex is like the most obvious solution, it will help you

40
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:13,200
relax, it will make you feel loved, and you're, you'd be more ready to talk about this awful

41
00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:19,600
shit, god damn, I wish she'd called me sooner, like when she started treating you so badly,

42
00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:24,720
I know it would have pissed her off, but that would have been a nice side benefit,

43
00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:31,920
I sound jealous, well, I guess I am a bit, protective about my friends,

44
00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:36,880
I try not to be a creep about it, but yeah, when some fancy bitch decides that my best

45
00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:42,560
friend shouldn't hang out with me, I get a little pissy, no, I'm sure she didn't say

46
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:48,720
anything like that to you, she wasn't that dumb, but you sure did have to cancel on me

47
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:58,000
a lot once you started seeing her, didn't you, yeah, she was coincidentally sick, and

48
00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:02,080
all those nights we were supposed to play board games or watch nerdy shit together,

49
00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:09,600
I don't blame you for missing it, you're blinded by that pussy, seriously though,

50
00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:15,040
what I meant to say is that you were still in the infatuation phase, you were only with

51
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:24,560
her for like, what, three months, but you guys moved fast, I know, I'm sorry for dragging

52
00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:31,680
you about this, it's just made me have, I regret, and I'm not really going to be able

53
00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:41,280
to move past it unless I get it off my fucking chest, is that okay, yeah, so I realize how

54
00:05:41,280 --> 00:05:45,840
she felt about me pretty early, and I was worried she would treat you badly, and she did,

55
00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:54,560
so I let you down, what could I have done, well, it's true that it's hard to convince

56
00:05:54,560 --> 00:06:02,560
somebody who's infatuated with their lover that it isn't good for them, but I think I

57
00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:07,280
probably should have done this,

58
00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:21,360
yeah, that startled expression tells me it probably would have worked,

59
00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:25,280
and all that other stuff going on in your pants right now,

60
00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:33,440
no, don't you ever think like that, I don't care what just happened, I'd never

61
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:41,440
ever kiss you out of pity, I don't kiss people that I don't feel for, I've thought about it

62
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:50,160
a lot, especially once I stopped seeing you around, I'm glad that it's taking your mind

63
00:06:50,160 --> 00:07:09,920
off things, but I could have done so much more, like wear this, yeah, I've been working

64
00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:22,800
up the courage to do that, I'm such a coward, so yeah, I like you, like a whole lot, Jesus

65
00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:29,760
fucking Christ, I'm so bad at this, I love you, like actual love, yes, I'm confessing my goddamn

66
00:07:29,760 --> 00:07:35,520
feelings to you, you're supposed to say some like Jane Austen shit or tell me to fuck off

67
00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:43,200
or something, I just, I don't do this shit, so I don't fucking know, you know what, I'm pretty

68
00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:52,320
sure bursting out laughing is not an appropriate response, dick, what do you mean that only I could

69
00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:56,800
swear this much during a romantic declaration, I don't fucking swear that much,

70
00:07:56,800 --> 00:08:23,600
see, this is distracting, oh no, fuck, wait, wait, wait, wait, yeah, I don't want to stop

71
00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:30,240
you there, but I need, I need you to understand that even if you, you just want sex and this

72
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:39,040
love thing is one sided, I am still not abandoning you, I, I'm really truly your friend, okay,

73
00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:51,760
okay, that's a, I guess I didn't expect to hear I love you back,

74
00:08:54,720 --> 00:09:03,280
I didn't prepare for that, no, I didn't fucking giggle, I wasn't giggling,

75
00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:19,280
okay, I just, you know what, shut up, shut up dork, no, it's, it's okay,

76
00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:34,320
okay, everything is better than okay, I just kind of want to prove that this is about you and

77
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:44,560
not getting your dick in me, oh yeah, I want to jump all over that cock, not tonight,

78
00:09:44,560 --> 00:09:54,720
I know I can be a little bossy, again with inappropriate laughter, look, I just want to

79
00:09:54,720 --> 00:10:01,600
suck your cock, I want to fucking swallow your cum, okay, I want to make you feel really good

80
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:08,480
and then fall asleep with you and hold you and if you got to cry, you can cry and then I want to

81
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:15,280
make you breakfast, you know, like the girlfriend shit or what should, should be girlfriend shit,

82
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:23,200
so let's go to the bedroom, come on, it's not like I don't know the way,

83
00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:33,920
go ahead and take off your clothes and lie down, it's not a request,

84
00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:42,640
it's not a request, don't worry, I'm taking mine off too, I just want to get you in a place where

85
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:51,840
you can just relax and let me take care of you, you don't have any idea how often I've thought

86
00:10:51,840 --> 00:11:07,360
about your cock in my mouth, it's shameful, if I had any shame, yeah, I like you like this,

87
00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:23,680
all exposed and vulnerable, so goddamn sexy, I've always loved your body, thank you, I thought I

88
00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:32,400
might be a little too curvy for you but I'm glad to know you appreciate them, I'm gonna want your

89
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:41,520
hands all over them pretty soon but in the meantime, let me say about this delicious cock,

90
00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:11,520
oh

91
00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:25,280
oh fuck, you taste so good,

92
00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:34,240
oh so right,

93
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:48,800
I kind of love doing this in general but

94
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:54,320
there's something about blowing someone you love

95
00:12:54,320 --> 00:13:10,320
and I can finally say it, I love you,

96
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:26,320
oh

97
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:36,480
a romantic blowjob, yeah, that's I guess what I want this to be,

98
00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:59,600
I want you to know that I'm yours, I probably shouldn't say this but I really have trouble

99
00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:13,120
saying no to you, when we're drunk, I used to make a lot of jokes about blowing you,

100
00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:28,480
I wanted you to say anything like you wanted me, I would have been yours without having to say

101
00:14:28,480 --> 00:14:39,280
anything and if you didn't want me after, I guess I could have just pretended I didn't remember

102
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:41,680
but that are great,

103
00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:49,680
oh

104
00:14:49,680 --> 00:15:11,040
oh fuck, when you say you will always want me, that's why I'll always say yes to you,

105
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:30,560
oh I hope that was good enough, is there anything else you want me to do, I'm

106
00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:40,880
guess I'm really yours and fuck, do I want to make you mine but that can wait,

107
00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:53,120
what are you getting out of that bed stand, fuck, holy shit, is that a strap on,

108
00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:59,600
did that bitch make you take that, if she pressured you into doing something you didn't

109
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:08,640
want, I swear to god I'll fucking throw her off the roof, oh it was your idea,

110
00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:15,600
yeah do you want me to

111
00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:28,720
fuck you with it, if I want, Jesus fucking Christ this is so hot, I'll be gentle,

112
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:36,160
I'll be gentle, I'll take care of you, you can always trust me okay,

113
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:47,520
okay, good, are you getting hard again, you must have thought about me doing this before,

114
00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:49,520
did you,

115
00:16:53,680 --> 00:17:00,080
oh yeah there is nothing wrong with that, roll over and get on all fours while I put this on,

116
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:06,720
all right, let me load this up,

117
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:15,440
great, are you still okay with this, I don't want to do anything you aren't comfortable with,

118
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:22,880
well okay, hearing you ask me to fuck you like that really does something to me,

119
00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:30,320
right, be careful or I might not be able to be gentle,

120
00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:42,160
okay, I'm putting it in now, I'm going to go really slow okay, okay,

121
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:53,040
okay, I am halfway there, you're doing great, oh fuck this is so hot,

122
00:17:56,720 --> 00:18:01,760
nearly in, just relax, I won't ever hurt you,

123
00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:15,680
I am so wet right now, you wouldn't believe it, God you took all of it, yeah I guess you

124
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:24,800
you are mine now, you look so beautiful right now, like this,

125
00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:29,840
this, if you aren't careful you're gonna make me come after all,

126
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:36,800
I'm gonna start moving now, it's okay to tell me to stop,

127
00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:44,160
no matter how excited I get, it's always okay to tell me to stop,

128
00:18:44,160 --> 00:18:57,840
stop, that's it, that's my good boy,

129
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:07,600
do you like when I say that, I heard you moan,

130
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:12,880
I really got me going, you really are my good boy,

131
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:25,520
you're taking my cock so well, fuck, you are so hot like this,

132
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:33,600
oh God please, please keep pushing back like that,

133
00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:44,320
you really, really love it, don't you, fuck, you are such a good boy for me,

134
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:56,000
and I love you so much right now, do you like that, do you, do you want to come again,

135
00:19:56,000 --> 00:20:07,760
do you want to come again, here I'll help with my hand okay, fuck, this is so hot, oh I love you too

136
00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:17,600
baby, I won't ever let you go okay, come for me, come for me, you're my good boy and I want you to

137
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:31,600
come for me, please, please, oh fuck, like that, oh my God, that was so fucking hot,

138
00:20:31,600 --> 00:20:45,840
if I had known this I would have confessed years ago, I'm gonna pull out now gently and slow okay,

139
00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:53,360
yeah, let me just get this off, I want to hold you now and I want you to hold me too,

140
00:20:53,360 --> 00:21:02,640
sometimes I like to be the little spoon, everybody likes to be the little spoon, it's safe,

141
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:14,800
you're, you're safe, yeah I love you too, I love you so goddamn much,

142
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:27,440
I'm so happy, I don't even, oh God, just shut the fuck up and hold me okay,

143
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:34,080
you're gonna be so insufferable about this, but only you can make me feel safe enough

144
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:45,520
to giggle like that, really, the best orgasm of your life, well okay then,

145
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:50,240
all is forgiven and the girly giggles will continue,

146
00:21:53,680 --> 00:22:00,480
are you okay with me spending the night, good, I love you too,

147
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:10,400
sleep well okay, tomorrow we can talk about everything, anything baby, anything you want.