1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:13,160 So I'm not sure if this'll be to everybody's taste or not, but I've got a bit of a hurried 2 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:19,240 clit at the moment, a wetness developing between my thighs. I don't even know why, to be honest, 3 00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:27,600 but my brain, of course, seeking to justify this, has wandered my thoughts down a rather 4 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:32,720 horny and interesting path, you see. With all the talks about blowjobs on the thread, 5 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:38,640 I keep thinking about my sir, and how far away he is, and just how badly he wants to 6 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:47,320 dam his dick down my throat, and honestly, how very badly I want that. So I suppose consider 7 00:00:47,320 --> 00:00:53,360 this a slick and a ramble, because I can't get my mind off of it, so I figure you all 8 00:00:53,360 --> 00:01:03,000 should at least get an opportunity to delight in my personal misery. So if you could probably 9 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:08,000 tell from the way that my breath shutters, I've been playing with myself this whole time, 10 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:17,240 just a bit. God, I wish he were here. I really do. I won't get to see him again until April 11 00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:22,000 after that trip to Vegas, because he lives so bloody far away. And no, he doesn't live 12 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:30,440 in Vegas, he was on vacation there, but fuck. I want it. I want to feel him grab me by the 13 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:36,400 hair and shove me down on top of his dick. I want him to see how eager I slip and suck 14 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:46,880 at it. God, I want him to choke me with it, until I can't take it anymore. Oh god. Both 15 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:53,120 of me want him to smack me around a little bit. If I decide to be a bit bratty, if I play 16 00:01:53,120 --> 00:02:00,600 with him, if I, for example, pull back just before he finishes, because I don't want it 17 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:06,880 to end. That's selfish, isn't it? For a sub to enjoy sucking cock so much that they don't 18 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:13,080 want it to end. But I've done it to my partners once I've pulled back just before they were 19 00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:19,400 about to finish. Let them ride the beginning of the orgasm and hear their frustration and 20 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:31,000 oh god, it turns into such delicious desperation, doesn't it? I'm absolutely not a sadist in 21 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:39,080 any way, shape or form. I'm very much masochist, but god, when somebody wants me so badly, 22 00:02:39,080 --> 00:02:45,200 then they start to lose control when they forget for a moment that they're human, where 23 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:55,080 it stops from being lovemaking and turns into pure unadulterating fucking. God, maybe that's 24 00:02:55,080 --> 00:03:10,160 what I'm craving. I want my face fucked. God, I really do want to choke on it. I want to 25 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:18,240 feel his desire. I want to feel just how useful I am. I want to hear his moans, the way his 26 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:24,000 breath catches, the way his body shudders, the way his pulse jumps. God, I want to feel 27 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:31,080 his hands on the back of my head pressing me, Hodo. I want to feel his thrusts. God, 28 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:40,480 I want it so badly. Normally I'm not a fan of blowjobs into fucking because it can cause 29 00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:47,360 complications for me, but if I made him so mad with my mouth, if I refused to take it 30 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:53,200 enough or frustrated him so much that he thrust my face into the ground, pulled my ass up 31 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:59,720 and had his way with me, oh, I wouldn't complain about that either. My pleasure face faced 32 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:06,160 in the pillow and his up in the air for his enjoyment, getting to spread me as wide as 33 00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:14,160 he wants, or he punishes either of my holes for my impudence, for my selfish desire for 34 00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:22,280 his hoinniness, his desire to keep going. But it'll war with my desire to swallow his 35 00:04:22,280 --> 00:04:27,600 gum, won't it? Filling my vagina with it feels amazing, but knowing that I'm one of those 36 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:34,000 few girls who actually swallows, knowing how deep down my throat I'll have to go, I don't 37 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:42,920 know which one I'd want more. Oh, God. I guess what I really want is to be used. I want to 38 00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:52,240 be a toy. Right now, that's what I want the most. I want to know that my master is getting 39 00:04:52,240 --> 00:05:02,480 the most out of me. There are so much worse things he could do. He could drag a blade 40 00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:11,680 along my flesh. I'm stumbling over myself, I'm sorry. Poke me in strategic places, leave 41 00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:20,920 tiny paper cuts, or even slightly deeper gouges. Oh, the danger of that. But it doesn't have 42 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:29,840 the intimacy, the bestiality, the desperation of a face fuck, or of a doggy-style near-rape. 43 00:05:29,840 --> 00:05:34,800 I want to get him to the point where he's so desperate he doesn't even know what consent 44 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:43,360 is anymore, where I'm just forced to take it, where I'm overpowered. God. I want to 45 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:54,760 be wrecked. I want to be utterly destroyed. God, I want it so bad. God, I wish you were 46 00:05:54,760 --> 00:06:04,320 here. I wish you could see how desperately wet I am. You can hear my desperation. I wish 47 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:16,480 you could see it. I wish you could see how pathetic and submissive I am before you. I 48 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:38,280 was myself. But I want to fall into subspace. I want to be entirely subjugated at his feet. 49 00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:52,840 I want to worship all of him, his entire body, but most of all his cock, his balls, his lust. 50 00:06:52,840 --> 00:07:02,360 I want to pleasure him so much he whines out. I want to be ravaged so hurt I do, from pleasure 51 00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:21,040 to pain, it doesn't matter. God, I want to be used. I want it. I want to submit. I want 52 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:35,920 to be useful. I want it. Oh God. I want to be taken against my will. I want to be used. 53 00:07:35,920 --> 00:08:05,020 I want it. I want to be used. Oh my. That must've spiked on the mic a bit. I thought 54 00:08:05,020 --> 00:08:13,020 I lost myself a bit there instead of talking to myself, didn't I? 55 00:08:13,020 --> 00:08:19,020 Guess that shows how desperate I am for dominance. 56 00:08:19,020 --> 00:08:33,020 I can't wait for April.