Oh, that got your attention.
Hello, Father.
No, no, no.
Definitely not.
Not that.
You know, those vestments look real good on you, Father.
Anyways, let me pull up a chair.
Father, you and I need to have a conversation.
See?
Oh, you don't like it when I call you Father.
Yeah, no, I'm not calling you by your human name, no.
I'll stick to Mr.
Mr. sounds good? Yeah, okay.
Then we'll stick to Mr.
But you and I need to have a conversation.
You're really, really
bad at your job, and I'm trying to figure out why, because
to be quite frank with you,
Father,
your congregation is getting on my nerves.
I mean, every other week it's
they want this, they want that, they're
evil little twits, and whilst
I enjoy and indulge in the sinful,
even they're pushing my buttons, even they're pushing the limits.
So,
I'm coming to the source because they all seem to have you in common.
And I think I've figured out
what's been
having them
with the urge to burst at the scene
and do all these sinful,
dirty things.
Tell me, Father,
if you haven't noticed how many
people have suddenly shown up at your church
and how few of them are actually about,
you know, the praying and the
books and all that. I don't know.
What am I?
Father, Mister, come on now.
Surely you've figured out by now
that I'm a demon.
I'm not a
traditional one either.
I have a special job.
I
may or may not have done a thing,
owed a guy a favor, and now I'm paying for it.
So, lust and love,
that's my sin.
Drowning people in it, indulging
to the utmost highest
and
overwhelming
type of thing.
Oh, Father,
Father, Father,
look at those big eyes.
You know exactly why
your congregation
has come looking for me.
Isn't that right?
Father,
you know,
it's frustrating
when we can't
let our urges be free,
don't you think, Father?
I mean,
don't you want to let
some of those frustrations out?
Your congregation sure has.
You should see them indulging
in such lustful acts.
Don't bother trying to hide it.
It's part of my powers
is to be able to sense
even the slightest bit
of attraction, lust,
tension,
all those good things that come with such
lewd acts.
I can smell them in the air.
They carry electricity.
It's a wondrous thing
that your congregation is ruining, so
because I can't punish them all,
I'm going to punish you,
and you're going to let me.
Isn't that right, Mister?
Yeah, now,
whilst the nodding
and the enthusiasm from below
is much appreciated,
I need you to say the words
out loud.
Please, ma'am.
Punish me.
Use me.
Say them out loud.
Now.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Good boy.
But you know what?
I'm going to have some fun, so
bend yourself over that desk
and show me
your bare ass
right now.