You're not smiling, it's the matter, you have no idea how to take care of a drunk friend, is that it?
Hmm? Oh please, don't roll your eyes at me. Fine, fine, I'll drink the water.
There, look, magic. It's not gonna help. I mean, I drank a whole bottle of Jameson by myself. Sure, I started in the morning.
But you know, I don't give a fuck what anyone says. And neither does my best friend because she knows that I, as her maid of honor, am the happiest person in this room for her because I love her.
Despite the fact that I've been drinking and am no longer able to continue my madly honorable duties.
What, Mr. Prim, proper, perfect? Hmm? What is it, mister? Oh, that's right, you hate it when I call you that. What are you gonna do?
You've always been the one to be put together compared to me, mostly. Hmm, and Bestie, she's a wild child, but she's got her own Mr. Prim proper.
What? What? You're looking at me like you wanna say something.
How drunk am I? You know, surprisingly, not Spring Break 2011 drunk. That was fun. I didn't know someone could have a heart attack like that.
I mean, her titties, like, sloshing them should be no big deal. There we go, there's a smile. You're not such a grouch, are you, mister?
Don't shake your head at me. Come on. There's a wedding going on, we should be happy.
You look worried. You wanna talk to me about it? Yeah. Yeah, I know what you mean.
I just... This is told under the alcohol, despite me being sober, I will never repeat this again, especially, I will never admit, especially that I said it to you, mister, alright?
That you get told enough that you're too much, that they can't handle you, that you talk back, that you're a smartass, that yada yada yada, you eventually start to believe it, you know?
It's like, alright, clearly, no one's gonna wanna be with me because I am prim and proper, right? In your case, and in mine, it's...
I'm wild, and I'm strong, and I am in charge, and I fucking take control, but I'm not like that all the time.
It's like, no one can accept that. It's like this impossibility. I don't know.
What? You're looking at me with those eyes? What eyes? Really, what eyes? I don't know.
Hey, you're awfully close. What? I'm not too much, huh?
Yeah, this would be so cliché. The maid of honor and the best man hooking up at the wedding. So cliché. Are we that cliché?
What do you say, mister? You gonna kiss me or what?
Okay. Oh, okay. Oh, no, that was really hot, you know, just grabbing me by the hips and pulling me onto your lap.
Gotta say, you're winning a lot of points here, mister.
What? Shut up. This is not cute. Giggling is not cute. Most men find it irritating when I giggle in the bedroom. The women do.
See? And that's what I mean. It's just me having a good time.
Fuck. Whoa. Your hand. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
What do you mean? Drive you crazy, huh? Not just by being in the same room as you.
You know, your hands on the hips feel really good. You know where they would feel even better? On my naked skin.
So, did me a favor. I kept the dress.
Fuck. Jesus. Not even. Any more to go.
Your hand feels really good inside me. Fuck.
What? Okay. The alphabet backwards. Is this your way of asking if I'm sober?
Sober or drunk? I still wanna fuck you. You can ask my bestie once we're done. Or we could call her now. I'm sure she wouldn't mind.
It's a very nice image. You with your zipper down. Dick hard. Hanging out. Three fingers inside me. My tits out of the dress.
I mean, it's kinda hot. I'm sure she'd enjoy the imagery.
Well, I came here fully prepared not to get laid. So no, I don't have condoms. But, I mean, we can control ourselves, right?
As long as you have to come inside me. Right? We can be good.
You can stop right when you're about to come. I'll finish you with my mouth. Yeah?
Hope that got you going, huh? Oh, fuck. Jesus.
Oh, I skimped on foreplay. This is supposed to be a quickie. We're supposed to be a part of this fuck wedding, you know?
You feel really good. What? Oh, no. No, no, no, no. I'm not being loud. Are you kidding me? If we get caught.
Oh, fuck you. You feel really good.
God damn it. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Jesus Christ. Fuck you.
God, you're really good with your hands. Oh, fuck.
Please, please don't stop. Oh, God. Oh, God. You are so good at that. You feel so good.
Oh, yeah. No. What? No. No, don't stop. Don't stop. Don't stop. So close. Please. What?
If you don't stop, you're gonna come inside me. Is that it?
We're already breaking all the rules. We might as well keep breaking them, don't you think?
Please. I don't care. Please. Please. Just keep going. Please. Please. Keep going.
Please. Fuck. Oh, God.
Are you holding up there, mister? Oh, I talked you into this.
You know, I've noticed you haven't pulled out of me. Maybe you're comfy. Hmm?
You talk trash, but admit it. You had fun with me. Maybe we'll have fun again.
I mean, after all, we've already broken a couple of rules. What's the harm if we keep going?
Now, off. I have to go be a maid of honor, and you have to go be a best man, mister.
Oh, okay. No more mister. Aye, aye, Captain. Fuck you. I do what I want.
Oh, you have a name. That's so cute. Yeah.
Oh, no, no, no. You weren't calling me by my name. I believe the exact words you said as you were coming inside me were
good fucking girl. I like that. You can keep using that. Now, come here. Let's go.
We have a wedding to attend.