## if you ever get near my german shepard

Added Saturday, September 20, 1997

I got this e-mail on August 30, 1997:

> Subject: Beastiality

> You are a sick motherfucker. You know fuckin your neighbords dog IS illegal, and if you ever get near my german shepard i will kick the living fuck out of you bitch. You're a fuckin fag. Why dont you try having sex with female human beings, its better than dogs and horses you sick shit. AND YOU SUCKED A DOGS FUCKING DICK. thats is wrong dude, you are fucked up to shit. fucker. im gonna kick your ass. can you not get a girl, so you fuck god damn farm animals. I have to admit, your stories were interesting, i like learning about sick fucks like you. But you are fucked up and gross. If i ever caught anyone doing shit like that with my German Shepard, I would fuckin fight them to the death. you sick mother fucker.

My response follows:

Hi [snip],

Wish I'd responded earlier, but I've been rather busy. Anyway, I'll get to your e-mail.

>You are a sick motherfucker.

I did have a cold last week, but I'm over it, thanks. And I've never been attracted to my mom in that way, much less acted on my feelings. Our relationship is purely platonic.

>You know fuckin your neighbords dog IS illegal

It's risky, yes, but in this state it's not prohibited by law. As long as the animal comes to me and I'm not trespassing on the owners' property, no harm is done.

>if you ever get near my german shepard

Well, since I don't know where you live, that's rather unlikely, and besides, I doubt I would even know which one was yours, unless I read the name on your mailbox.

>i will kick the living fuck out of you bitch.

First of all, I'm not a bitch, though every time I see a well-endowed male dog, I have my fantasies. :) And you're certainly welcome to kick the living what-have-you out of me, since you have every right to protect your animals and your family members from what you perceive as a threat. It's a risk I live with every time I'm intimate with someone else's animals. Just remember I bear them, and you, no ill will, and my intentions are honorable, even if your interpretation of them is not.

>You're a fuckin fag.

Well, I'm still a virgin, so I'm not a "f*ckin" anything at this point. And if I were exclusively attracted to male humans, then perhaps your other term would be accurate. However, I'm attracted to animals of both genders, therefore I cannot be a "fag." Even if I were attracted only to male animals, the definition of homosexuality doesn't include animals, only humans. So I still wouldn't be gay: just zoo.

>Why dont you try having sex with female human beings

Well, as soon as I find a human female who accepts me as a zoo and is willing to embrace my lifestyle, she and I may do just that. But I don't become intimate with people simply because I want to get my rocks off: there has to be something between us besides sex.

>its better than dogs and horses you sick shit.

I generally hear that only from people who haven't been with animals. Many people who've had both on a regular basis feel the opposite is true. Since you've never been intimate with an animal (I presume), you're not in much of a position to compare.

>AND YOU SUCKED A DOGS FUCKING DICK.

Yep, sure did. Enjoyed every drop, too. :)

>thats is wrong dude, you are fucked up to shit.

>fucker. im gonna kick your ass.

I notice you have a strong tendency to resort to what Spock termed "colorful metaphors" whenever you feel stressed. The mark of maturity is the ability to respond to a threatening situation with calm intellect and reason. That doesn't mean you can't kick someone's ass, you just have to go about it logically. :)

>can you not get a girl, so you fuck god damn farm animals.

I choose to accept my lifestyle as it is. If I find a human who shares my interests, and wishes to share her life with mine, wonderful. If I wanted to get laid, I'm sure I could. If I wanted a girlfriend, I'm sure I could get one. I'm young, intelligent, have a sense of humor (obviously), and am gainfully employed. That's all you really need, and if your spirit is willing, even youth is an option. I am intimate with animals not because I can't get a girl, but because it is normal and natural for me to be with animals. It is part of who I am, and I have learned not to run from it. I need both in my life.

>I have to admit, your stories were interesting, i like learning about >sick fucks like you.

ROTFL! I love getting e-mail like yours, because there is always a gem hidden inside. You go to such great lengths tearing me down, or trying to, and then you say that secretly you find me interesting. Now, I'm not saying that's something you should be ashamed of. I'm honored you took the time to write me in the first place. Most people who see something that freaks them out simply run from it. You took the initiative to send me e-mail. Just remember this the next time you see something you don't like. In everything unpleasant is an opportunity to expand your horizons. You've found someone whose behavior repulses you, yet you are fascinated by it at the same time. Pursue that. No harm will come of it.

>But you are fucked up and gross.

You judge me from but a website? Surely thou art premature in thy opinions. And I've never been called gross by anyone who knows me well: only by people who know nothing of the person behind the mask.

>If i ever caught anyone doing shit like that with my >German Shepard, I would fuckin fight them to the death.

And I wouldn't blame you. It's your dog, your responsibility, and your right to defend him or her. Be aware, however, that beating someone to death for being intimate with an animal is likely to get you sent to prison, unless you are able to demonstrate that the person you attacked represented a threat to you and/or your human family. In my case, that wouldn't be possible, and you'd be hard pressed to find a criminal psychologist who would help you out. Most are pretty well-educated, and they know that attraction to animals does not a villain make. True villainy comes from staring truth in the face...and blinking.

>you sick mother fucker.

Hmm. We come full circle at last. :)

In spite of everything, take care, and if you wish to expand your mind, e-mail me. I'm keen to talk. But you probably figured that out already. :)

visits since 9/20/97

Flames -- Updated Saturday, September 20, 1997 -- E-mail Actaeon