# The abpeb FAQ

###

####

    Newsgroups: alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.bestiality
    Subject: == alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.bestiality FAQ (4.0) ==
    Date: Sat, 01 Jun 1996 20:38:10 -0400

    Stasya's note:
    Stroud's no longer exists so all references to it have been removed.

    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    !!!!! WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING !!!!!
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    DISCLAIMER: I have posted this FAQ merely to make this information freely
    available to others, and do not encourage the reader to engage in any
    activities which may be contrary to the law of his or her community.

    This newsgroup contains material depicting sexual intercourse between human
    animals and other animals (no kidding!), so if you find material of this sort
    offensive DO NOT download anything. The material here is EXPLICIT, VERY
    EXPLICIT, as in "TOTAL PENETRATION OF THE ORIFICES" EXPLICIT! (Did I mention
    that the material is explicit?) Leave immediately if you're easily disturbed
    by this sort of material and save your petty indignance for your priest,
    minister, rabi, guru, or some other charlatan. If you're a sweet, innocent
    lil' minor and accessing this group SHAME ON YOU! Now log off and go read the
    bible lest your immortal soul be lost forever! If the bible isn't your cup of
    tea go watch "Murder, She Wrote" reruns on the USA Network; Angela Lansbury
    is getting a little long in the tooth, but she hasn't lost her irrepressible
    charm. ;-)

    ===========================================================================
    =============== alt.binaries.pictures.erotia.bestiality FAQ ===============
    ===========================================================================

    ANSWERS TO COMMON QUESTIONS!   HELPFUL HINTS!   DEEP PHILOSOPHICAL INSIGHTS!

    No newbie, you haven't achieved nirvana, but have stumbled upon a FAQ written
    to explicate the seemingly inexplicable. Lie back with a soda pop, put up
    your feet, and prepare your mind for penetration. ;-)

    A 'Netscape Enhanced' FAQ!

    SUBJECT: == alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.bestiality FAQ (4.0) ==
    POSTING FREQUENCY: Every time a copy disappears from my news server.
    FIRST POSTED: January 1996
    CREATED BY: Vox, the Electronic Epicurean (who mysteriously disappeared)
    CONTENTS:

    * Introduction
    * Frequently Asked Questions

      Q: What do the various filename extensions that I see refer to?
      Q: Why can't I view these files when I download them?
      Q: How do I download files?
      Q: How do I upload files?
      Q: How do I attach multipart files after I download them?
      Q: How do I view graphics files?
      Q: How do I view video files?
      Q: How do I deal with files that are "zipped" (whatever that is)?
      Q: How do I compress various graphics files into a single archive that I
         can post?
      Q: I have megs o' smut to upload and want to create an index, so how do
         I do this?
      Q: I have megs o' smut to upload, but don't want anyone to know who I am.
         What should I do?
      Q: I have pictures o' smut to upload, so how do I convert them to computer
         files?
      Q: I'm a MAC user and would like to know: Where I could find programs for
         *my* computer?
      Q: How reliable are people when it comes to sending me free pictures and
         other goodies that they offer?
      Q: I responded to a "FREE XXX PIX VIA E-MAIL!!" (or some variant) message
         in one of the newsgroups, and haven't received any pictures. How much
         longer will I have to wait?
      Q: Are there any FTP or Web sites where bestiality pictures are available?
      Q: What about BBSes?
      Q: Where else might I find bestiality pictures?
      Q: Do you have any pictures that you could send me?
      Q: Is there any information available which instructs me on how to
         have sex with animals?
      Q: Is downloading/uploading pictures like these illegal?
      Q: Is bestiality morally wrong?
      Q: If I'm interested in bestiality stories, where can I get/post them?
      Q: Are there any mailing lists or magazines, either electronically or
         snail-mail based, concerning bestiality/zoophilia?
      Q: I've heard that there are agents provocateur online soliciting pictures
         and other information in order to prosecute people. Is this true?
      Q: Where can I find encryption software for my files and messages?
      Q: What is the meaning of life?

    * Common Emoticons
    * Helpful Hints
    * Additional Comments

    ===========================================================================
    ============================== INTRODUCTION ===============================
    ===========================================================================

    Hello newbie!

    Thanks for taking the time to read the a.b.p.e.b FAQ. I took the initiative
    and wrote this FAQ because I got tired of the endless "Re:" and "me too"
    replies, as well as the "how do I . . .?" questions; another reason for
    composing this FAQ was to undermine the digital hucksters in their attempt to
    sell information which is *freely* available to anyone with the inclination
    to seek it out on the 'net, but not the time. It should answer the general
    questions that you have, as well as the more technical ones. You may also
    find the news:alt.sex.bestiality multi-part FAQ of interest, as it's a more
    comprehensive treatment of the general subject and perfectly complements this
    FAQ. If you have any problems with any of the links I've included in this
    FAQ, please let me know so I that can update or correct them.

    Enjoy this newsgroup while you can since it and many other alt.* newsgroups
    probably won't be around for much longer; make sure to thank your particular
    Capons in Congress for their valiant attempts to protect you from yourself.
    If you don't know who your shills in Congress are you can find out at the
    following URLs:

    http://www.house.gov (a.k.a "House of Ill Repute")
    http://www.senate.gov (a.k.a "Assembly of Sham")

    Welcome to contemporary America, kiddies, where Leviathan and Mary Poppins
    have coupled, and spawned the meddlesome nanny-state.

    ===========================================================================
    ====================== FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS =========================
    ===========================================================================

    Q: What do the various filename extensions that I see refer to?

    A: The filename extensions refer to various file formats. Here's a list of
    the most common filename extensions that you'll see in alt.binaries.*
    newsgroups and what they mean:

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------
    filename extension    file format
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------

    .txt                  standard text file
    .jpg or .jpeg         JPEG image file (Joint Photographic Experts Group)
    .gif                  GIF image file  (Graphics Interchange Format)
    .avi                  Video for Windows video file (Audio/Video Interweave)
    .mpg or.mpeg          MPEG video file (Motion Picture Experts Group)
    .mov                  QuickTime for MAC/Windows video file
    .zip                  compressed, or "zipped", archive
    .exe                  program file, or self-extracting archive
    .htm or .html         HyperText Markup Language document, i.e., web page

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Each of these file formats requires a program equipped to handle it, so make
    sure that you have the proper software before you spend thirty minutes
    downloading a 2 MB MPEG file! ;-)

    Q: Why can't I view these files when I download them?

    A: Because you have to decode the files first. The files in alt.binaries.*
    newsgroups are binary files (image files, programs, etc.) uuencoded (*.uue)
    as ASCII text files. In other words, the binary data are converted into a
    sequence of alphanumeric characters and stored in a file which can be posted
    as if it were a regular textual message. This is because the NNTP protocol
    (used to transmit USENET newsgroup data) was designed to deal with ASCII text
    files, not binary files. Various programs are available to uuencode/uudecode
    files, a notable one being Wincode for Windows. Decoding with Wincode is
    simply a matter of using the "Decode" command in the "File" menu.

    Please note that newsreader programs such as WinVN and Free Agent, not to
    mention Netscape 2.01, do all of the uuencoding/uudecoding of images for you.

    (The files with *.zip and *.exe filename extensions are compressed archives.)

    Q: How do I download files?

    A: That all depends upon the newsreader you are using. If you're using
    Netscape 2.01, it's simply a matter of selecting a desired subject header
    in the list and sitting back to relax -- the program automatically downloads
    and displays the file for you in the bottom window. Once it is downloaded
    you simply save it to your local hard drive, an option that can be found in
    the "File" menu. Please note that you will have to decode the file as it'll
    be saved in uuencoded form. An easier method is to position your mouse over
    the displayed image and click on it with the right button, causing a pop-up
    menu to appear. You can then select the "Save this Image as..." menu item and
    choose a name for the file, as well as the location to which the file will
    be saved. This latter method is superior to the first since the image is
    automatically decoded and ready for viewing with the appropriate program.
    Netscape 2.01, as well as the latest version, Netscape 3.0 beta 4, is
    available at the following URL:

    http://www.netscape.com/

    Programs such as WinWN and Free Agent have very good help files which
    describe the "how to's", so I won't go into detail here. Suffice it to say
    that "downloading" and "saving" commands are generally found in one of the
    menus, usually "File". Most programs use the same basic methodology, though,
    so "double-clicking" on an article's header will usually bring the desired
    result.

    Q: How do I upload files?

    A: When using the conventional method the first thing you need to do is
    uuencode the file (see previous questions and answers). If you don't do this
    the file is worthless -- since it is still in its binary form and has become
    "garbled" -- and will piss off many people. The upload command, which is
    sometimes called "Post New Article", is probably in one of the menus but
    check your documentation, if possible. With Netscape 2.01 you simply choose
    the "To: News" button on the toolbar, then "cut and paste" the uuencoded file
    into the message and send. Other programs have the same basic procedure. If
    the binary file has been divided into parts by the uuencoder make sure that
    each part is posted individually. If one of the file-parts isn't present the
    other files will be useless, so unless the file is exceptionally large try
    to post it as one message.

    A much easier method of posting a file is to send it as a MIME (Multipurpose
    Internet Mail Extension) attachment to another file; in fact, that's how I
    sent the image which accompanies this FAQ. Using the MIME feature usually
    entails simply choosing the "attachment" command, wherever it may be, and
    selecting the desired file to be sent. You don't even have to uuencode the
    graphic file since it'll be done by the program for you; make sure that you
    *DON'T* encode the file since doing so will "double encode" it, making the
    file worthless. The process of using MIME attachments differs from program
    to program so I won't go into specifics, but suffice it to say it is
    *extremely* simple to do. Also, don't forget that there are a number of
    newsgroups where you can practice posting messages, such as:

    news:alt.test

    news:alt.test.test

    news:alt.testing.testing

    news:alt.test.only

    news:alt.test.yer.posts

    Unless you enjoy having semiliterate strangers shriek insults and epithets
    at you (hey, who doesn't?), I suggest that you practice posting in the above
    newsgroups before uploading files to a.b.p.e.b, that way you won't have any
    problems the first time you "de-lurk". Uuencode and upload, then download and
    uudecode the files to make sure you've posted them correctly, experiment with
    cross-posting and trimming, append MIME attachments to your files, and paint
    the town red, so to speak.

    Labeling your posts with a descriptive subject header is also important for
    clarity's sake. A common convention in USENET Newsgroups is:

    for single files:

    Chick fucking mouse: chicmaus.jpg [1/1]

    or for multi-part files:

    Woman blowing horse: horsyblo.avi [1/3]
    Woman blowing horse: horsyblo.avi [2/3]
    Woman blowing horse: horsyblo.avi [3/3]

    There's nothing worse (well there is, but humor me) than subject headers like
    "Look at this" or "a picture", since they are usually irrelevent to this
    particular newsgroup and cross-posted to a gazillion other newsgroups, all
    of them having nothing in common except that their names happen to begin with
    "alt".

    Here's one more caveat for this particular question: ASCII text files (this
    FAQ being an example of one) needn't be uuencoded since *they are already
    ASCII text files.* Whenever I come across a uuencoded text file I just skip
    over it, and imagine many others do the same thing since messages of this
    sort quite often aren't worth the effort of decoding.

    Q: How do I attach multipart files after I download them?

    A: If you're asking this question then I assume your newsreader can't save
    multiple files to a single file, so I suggest that you use another newsreader
    that can. But here's the answer to the question anyhow: download and save
    each part individually, using filenames such as ponyluv5.01, ponyluv5.02,
    etc. to distinguish part 1 from part 2, then use a text editor (Windows
    Notepad probably isn't up to the task -- more on this later) to either
    "insert", or "cut and paste", each part into the new, single file you're
    creating. Once each file part has been inserted or pasted into this new file,
    save it, then uudecode it with the requisite software. Please note that the
    parts of the file that you download must be in *uuencoded* form in order for
    you to insert them into another file. Another thing to keep in mind is that
    you need to insert the parts in the proper order, i.e., make sure part 1
    precedes part 2, part 2 precedes part 3, etc.

    As I mentioned above Windows Notepad probably isn't going to be able to do
    the job, since it can't display files over 55 KB (or something like that),
    so you'll need a text editor capable of displaying large files. Luckily for
    you I know of such a program, called Edit Master, which can be found at the
    following URL:

    http://www.csusm.edu/cwis/winworld/editor.html

    I use Edit Master and have been able to view text files as large as 1 MB, so
    it should serve your purposes. It's a bit sluggish on my system (486/33 mhz,
    8 MB of RAM) but has a number of very useful features, and definitely puts
    Notepad to shame.

    Q: How do I view graphics files?

    A: Once you have downloaded, saved to disk, and decoded the file using the
    respective software you need some kind of image viewer. I personally use
    Thumbsplus (a shareware progam) and LView (a freeware program) but there
    are innumerable others. The aforementioned programs can display JPEGs, GIFs,
    BMPs, PCXs, and a few other graphics formats, as well as modify them. I
    *highly* recommend Thumbsplus since it enables you to view "thumbnails" of
    files in a directory, making organization much easier.

    Q: How do I view video files?

    A:  Once you have downloaded, saved to disk, and decoded the file using the
    respective software, you need some kind of video player. The most popular
    video formats are QuickTime (*.mov), Video for Windows (*.avi), and MPEG
    (*.mpg), so you'll need a video player that is capable of playing whichever
    format your file happens to be. Some players have the capability to play
    a combination of file formats (like NET TOOB), some don't, so be aware of
    that. I personally use the Quicktime for Windows, Video for Windows, and
    VMPEG video players.

    Q: How do I deal with files that are "zipped" (whatever that is)?

    A: Sometimes people compress large files, or a collection of related files,
    into a single file called an "archive" for the purpose of economizing their
    disk space; some archives aren't compressed, but the ones you will have to
    concern yourself with probably are. There are two kinds of compressed
    archives that I know of: a regular archive (*.zip, and a few other file
    formats) and a self-extracting archive (*.exe). A *.zip file needs to be
    decompressed using a program such as Winzip or PKzip/unzip, whereas a *.exe
    file is decompressed automatically when it's run since a small decompression
    program is attached to it (don't confuse *.exe archives with *.exe program
    files). WinZip can be used in conjunction with other compression programs,
    like PKzip/unzip, to create self-extracting archives as well as perform some
    other functions, so you may want both programs.

    PKzip/unzip (for DOS) can be found at the following URLs:

    ftp://ftp.germany.eu.net/pub/comp/msdos/mirror.garbo/arcers/pkz204g.exe

    ftp://ftp.csusm.edu/pub/dosworld/compress/pkz204g.exe

    These are both self-extracting archives, so simply run them, follow the
    installation directions, and then consult the "readme" files.

    Q: How do I compress various graphics files into a single archive that I can
    post?

    A: You'll need a program like Winzip, but I advise against doing this. JPEGs
    and GIFs are already compressed, so you're not going to be able to compress
    them much more; you'll probably achieve a negligible 1% compression rate,
    which is hardly worth the effort -- for you and every person trying to find
    part number 57 of 120! :-). Post each file individually. If you have huge
    files that you want to make available to others, look into getting space on
    an FTP server, since it'll save you as well as everyone else considerable
    time.

    Q: I have megs o' smut to upload and want to create an index, so how do I do
    this?

    A: It depends upon your particular graphics program, but most use the same
    basic procedure. If you're using LView, here's how:

    1) In the "File" menu choose "Multiple open...".

    2) A dialogue box will appear with a list of directories and files at the
    left. Choose the files you wish to display, press the "Add" button to add
    them to the display list, then choose the "Contact sheet" option in the
    middle (the default is "Sideshow").

    3) Now press the "Setup" button at the right to modify the look of the
    contact sheet. By using this command you can rearrange and shrink or expand
    the pictures to your specifications.

    4) Now press the "OK" button and the program will do the rest. It'll take a
    few minutes, depending upon the number of files to be displayed, so sit
    back and relax for awhile.

    5) Don't forget to "Save" the file when you're done.

    Q: I have megs o' smut to upload, but don't want anyone to know who I am.
    What should I do?

    A: You can send your messages through an anonymous remailer or through me.
    The only anonymous remailer that I know of, used by thousands of people, is
    located in Finland (Hence the ubiquitous "an000000@anon.penet.fi" e-mail
    addresses). For more information about this service, send e-mail to:

    mailto:help@anon.penet.fi (to receive the help file)

    or:

    mailto:ping@anon.penet.fi  (to receive an anonymous e-mail address)

    This particular remailer doesn't allow posting in alt.binaries.* newsgroups,
    so if you don't want people having your real e-mail address simply use
    the anonymous e-mail address, allocated for you by the system, in the
    configuration fields of your newsreader program. The only problem with this
    method is that people who view your message's header will be able to
    ascertain the NNTP-posting-host, i.e., the computer system from which the
    message originated, ultimately tracing it back to your account (if the
    person is so inclined and has copious free time).

    An irksome problem with this service is that it is soooooooo slow; it takes
    about two days for the messages to appear in the newsgroups -- assuming they
    actually do appear: I sent a message anonymously two weeks ago and I'm still
    waiting for it to appear in the particular newsgroup. But the service is
    free, so I guess beggars can't be choosers.

    If you'd rather send your uuencoded pictures to me for posting, that would
    be fine with me, provided you: (1) stagger your postings over a few days; (2)
    don't send me obnoxiously large files; and (3) don't send me pictures that
    were posted by another person less than two weeks ago. I'm being a Good
    Samaritan (one of a dying breed), so I really wouldn't appreciate "50 MB OF
    FREE PORN PIX IN MY MAILBOX!" every day (unlike the myriad me-too'ers, the
    bane of newsgroups).

    BTW, this Finnish remailer isn't entirely secure. A few years ago it was
    raided by Finnish police, at the prompting of the Scientologists (tm), so
    keep in mind that your anonymity won't be absolute.

    Q: I have pictures o' smut to upload, so how do I convert them to computer
    files?

    A: You'll need a device called a scanner, which digitizes information such
    as text and pictures, and the appropriate software, which usually comes
    bundled with the hardware. Giving the details of such an endeavor goes
    beyond the scope of this FAQ, but any scanner that you buy will undoubtedly
    explain in great detail the process. I will however refer you to a company
    that I buy computer accessories from and have had good luck with called
    Insight, whose URL is:

    http://www.insight.com/

    Q: I'm a MAC user and would like to know: Where I could find programs for
    *my* computer?

    A: You can try searching at http://www.csusm.edu/cwis/macworld or
    http://www.shareware.com for starters. Here is a list of specific programs
    that you may be interested in:

    For decoding: Stuffit Expander

    For viewing GIFs or JPEGs: JPEGView

    For viewing MPEGs: Sparkle

    For viewing .mov files (Apple QuickTime): MoviePlayer

    [Remember, QuickTime was invented by Apple, not Microsoft.]

    These are all freeware.

    These can probably all be found at http://www.shareware.com but Mac users may
    have an easier time at the INFO-MAC HyperArchive site, which is at
    http://hyperarchive.lcs.mit.edu/HyperArchive.html -- this is an INFO-MAC
    mirror site with a search engine. No graphics or ads, so it's much faster
    than shareware.com.

    Q: How reliable are people when it comes to sending me free pictures and
    other goodies that they offer?

    A: Not very, so don't bother posting a "Re:" and/or "me too" reply to such
    a message in the newsgroup. It's a waste of space and time -- for you and
    every other person trying to scroll through the newsgroup -- and it pisses
    people off, so expect to be flamed or otherwise inconvenienced. You also
    look extremely foolish: Can you say "rube"? If you feel compelled to reply,
    do so via e-mail -- despite their impassioned urging that you don't. After
    all, if the person is legitimate, why *wouldn't* he want you to e-mail him?

    Q: I responded to a "FREE XXX PIX VIA E-MAIL!!" (or some variant) message in
    one of the newsgroups, and haven't received any pictures yet. How much
    longer will I have to wait?

    A: You'll probably receive your pictures some time after super-intelligent
    apes rise up and enslave mankind, but some time before the Second Coming of
    whatever messiah happens to be fashionable; in other words, it won't happen
    any time soon, pilgrim, since you've been scammed and/or shammed. But don't
    feel bad because you've learned a valuable lesson about the world: people
    suck. ;-) I suggest that you consult the "FREE XXX SMUT VIA E-MAIL - TABOO
    PIX!" trojan-horse message I've begun posting for a more in-depth examination
    of this rampant phenomenon.

    Q: Are there any FTP or Web sites where bestiality pictures are available?

    A: Occasionally someone will post a URL, but don't get your hopes up, since
    most of these addresses turn out to be phantasms or, if legitimate, are
    overwhelmed by users and deactivated promptly. There are hoary tales, no
    doubt told by wizened men around campfires, of what I call "Flying Dutchman"
    FTP sites, i.e., sites which are rumored to exist and have only been seen by
    a select few. I've never caught a glimpse of any, so it might be net legend.

    I have recently become aware of an FTP site where bestiality material is
    available, called -- appropriately enough -- "The Fun Barn", but I'm not sure
    how reliable it is so "caveat emptor". This is a commercial service, not a
    charitable organization, so be aware of that when you request more
    information from the proprietors. More information about it can be obtained
    by sending a request message to the following e-mail address:

    mailto:jessed@ix.netcom.com

    Q: What about BBSes?

    A: Bestiality pictures are available at *some* BBSes but I haven't compiled
    much of a list yet; if you have such a list, I'd like to see it. Here's what
    I have so far:

    Heads Up BBS
    http://www.kaiwan.com/~hubbs/hubbs.html
    (909) 681-3721

    ON-Line Orgasms BBS
    http://www.intergate.net/uhtml/oobbs.html
    (770) 972-2062

    Amateur Action BBS
    (408) 263-3393

    Windy City BBS
    (708) 564-2245

    The Dirty Hacker BBS
    http://205.161.119.237/
    telnet://205.161.119.237
    node 1 (914) 796-4566
    node 2 (914) 794-5306

    Each one of these BBSes should have bestiality material available since they
    have either posted files in a.b.p.e.b previously or advertise it at their
    websites. The best of the bunch seems to be "The Dirty Hacker BBS" since at
    their website they have a lengthy list of bestiality GIFs, as well as dozens
    of video clips, that they have available, and offer telnet access -- which
    enables subscribers to avoid those costly phone bills. I might give it a try.

    Q: Where else might I find bestiality pictures?

    A: You could try:

    news:alt.sex.bestiality.pictures

    news:alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.tasteless

    news:alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.fetish

    news:alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.animals

    Or you could create your own! Don't expect to find image files in
    news:alt.sex.bestiality or news:alt.sex.zoophile because they're strictly
    discussion groups (actually, a.s.z is currently nothing more than a spam
    repository).

    Q: Do you have any pictures that you could send me?

    A: No, I'm not going to open up a can of worms and send dozens of people
    pictures that are readily available from so many different sources. Simply
    lurking in a.b.p.e.b for a few months should give you access to all the
    pictures you'll ever need, and *hundreds* of pictures are available at
    various BBSes across the planet, so you shouldn't have any trouble building
    an erotica collection. Plus, I don't feel like dealing with the consequences
    of unwittingly sending this material to minors who are posing as adults.

    Q: Is there any information available which instructs me on how to
    have sex with animals?

    A: Yes. I personally don't have sex with animals so I can't give you any
    insights, but there is a FAQ concerning the "how to's", as well as other FAQs
    dealing with the social/legal issues, in news:alt.sex.bestiality. You can
    also find the a.s.b and a.b.p.e.b FAQs, as well as other related material,
    at the following URL:

    http://www.av.qnet.com/~stasya (Stasya's Zoo Pages)

    Q: Is downloading/uploading pictures like these illegal?

    A: I don't know about downloading, but uploading is -- according to the new
    Telecom Law ratified by El Presidente Clinton. For those who can endure
    legalese, here's an excerpt from the CDA provision of the Telecom Law (which
    hasn't taken effect yet because of constitutional challenges):

    "[Whoever] . . . uses an interactive computer service to send to a specific
    person or persons under 18 years of age, or uses any interactive computer
    service to display in a manner available to a person under 18 years of age,
    any comment, request, suggestion, proposal, image, or other communication
    that, in context, depicts or describes, in terms patently offensive as
    measured by contemporary community standards, sexual or excretory activities
    or organs, regardless of whether the user of such service placed the call or
    initiated the communication; or knowingly permits any telecommunications
    facility under such person's control to be used for an activity prohibited
    by paragraph (1) . . ." will be subject to the following penalties:

    a) a hefty little fine,
    b) imprisonment for no more than two years,
    c) or both, depending upon the degree of petulance of the judge you find
       yourself before.

    As you can see from the wording in the above informational tidbit bestiality
    isn't the only activity that's literally under the gun. Simply posting an
    amusing anecdote about a troublesome bowel movement (an excretory activity!)
    "in a manner available to a person under 18 years of age" is now prohibited
    under this law. Even Newt Gingrich, (R-GA), when asked about this provision
    months ago, said that it was "clearly unconstitutional". If you'd like to see
    the complete text of this legislation, which is conveniently written in
    Orwellian Newspeak (tm) for American doublethinkers, visit the Electronic
    Privacy Information Center at:

    http://www.epic.org/

    or Hotwired's irreverent treatment of the issue at:

    http://www.hotwired.com/

    Q: Is bestiality morally wrong?

    A: If you're one of faith's victims, i.e., a Christian, Jew, or Moslem, yes.
    If not, I suppose anything goes -- just don't frighten the horses, people.

    Q: If I'm interested in bestiality stories, where can I get/post them?

    A: People occasionally post stories and anecdotes here, but check
    news:alt.sex.bestiality, news:alt.sex.zoophile, news:alt.sex.stories, or any
    of the other alt.sex.* newsgroups. There are also a number of internet sites
    containing this material, too, which interconnect and form a kind of
    "ZOOnet", providing links to other information and resources. Here's a short
    list of URLs for your perusal:

    http://www.av.qnet.com/~stasya (Stasya's Zoo Pages)

    http://psg.com/~jimd/uzp/ (The Ultimate Zoo Page)

    http://www.blueneptune.com/~calzoo (CalZoo Page)

    http://www.io.org/~clone/zoo (The Zoo)

    http://www.aros.net/~mikcat/zoopage2.html (Mikcat's Zoo Page)

    gopher://nifty.andrew.cmu.edu/11//pub/erotica//bestiality (a story archive)

    Q: Are there any newsletters or magazines, either electronic or snail-mail
    based, concerning bestiality/zoophilia?

    A: There *was* an on-line magazine devoted to this material, which was shut
    down in anticipation of the CDA, but I'm not aware of any others. If you're
    looking for bestiality print magazines, visit your local adult bookstore --
    assuming it hasn't been driven out of business by the custodes morum. The
    only bestiality print magazine that I know of is called The Wild Animal Revue
    magazine. You can find out how to order it by purchasing the Alternative
    Lifestyles Directory at the following URL:

    http://www.pictac.com/lifestyles

    I personally haven't read the magazine so I can't give you an opinion of it.

    If the CDA of '96 is fully implemented and enforced, and service providers
    terminate provocative newsgroups like this one, I'm considering starting an
    electronic newsletter for the exchange of pictures, fiction, and anecdotes
    which would be encrypted and sent via e-mail to *adult* subscribers. It'll
    only happen if there's a crackdown, so if this is of interest to you let me
    know . . . before it's too late.

    Q: I've heard that there are agents provocateur online soliciting pictures
    and other information in order to prosecute people. Is this true?

    A: Beats me. On the one hand, I haven't seen any evidence to indicate this,
    nor have I ever read of a bestiality bust anywhere, so it's probably just
    urban myth (like Richard Gere's little escapade with the hamster). It seems
    to me that federal agents have better things to do (like harass people who
    smoke pot or publish provacative e-zines) than hunt down individuals who like
    to collect animal erotica. But on the other hand, who knows to what extent
    the pathological powermongers in BIG GOVERNMENT are obsessed with how you
    and I live our lives. Obviously, any solicitations by strangers should be
    handled cautiously, especially if they're hellbent on your sending them
    animal erotica via the postal service. Stay away from the kiddie stuff and
    be wary of "Greeks bearing gifts" (or GIFs, as the case may be), and you
    shouldn't have any problems.

    Q: Where can I find encryption software for my files and messages?

    A: The most popular program is probably Pretty Good Privacy (PGP), which can
    be found at the following URL:

    http://web.mit.edu/network/pgp.html

    You can use PGP to encrypt/decrypt messages and files; once a file or message
    is encrypted it will be unreadable without the proper "key", making it quite
    safe from the prying eyes of the net guardians (though no encryption software
    is 100% secure). This is very serious technology so make sure that you have
    read all of the documentation before you use the program; if the program
    isn't used properly your files could be compromised or you, yourself, could
    end up unable to access them. Documentation for PGP can be found at the
    following URL (and elsewhere, of course):

    http://apollo.nyser.net/~repayne/Pgp/

    PGP is available for a variety of computer platforms.

    If you find DOS's command line as palatable as cardboard, then you might be
    interested in WPGP, a Windows "shell", or graphical program, which works in
    conjunction with DOS PGP for the same results. WPGP can be found at the
    following URL:

    http://www.panix.com/~jgostl/wpgp/

    Q: What is the meaning of life?

    A: Hmm. I've been asked this question a few times and frankly don't see how
    it relates to this FAQ, nor is a humble man like myself qualified to answer
    such a weighty question -- but I'll take a stab at it, anyway. This question
    has been debated by philosophers and metaphysicians for millenia, and
    numerous philosophical and religious systems have been created to answer this
    eternal question. Unfortunately, all of that boundless energy was expended
    needlessly, as it is a trick question, analagous to asking someone to guess
    what is in your empty pocket. There is no meaning to life, as the universe is
    a bleak, dark abyss. We are alone. There is no God. The pain that each of us
    experiences is all for naught. And life is but a fleeting, precarious state
    which, ultimately, is utterly futile. In light of these startling
    realizations one would naturally conclude that continued existence is
    illogical, and that the only rational course of action is suicide. Well,
    therein lies the irony of our tragic condition; we know that our individal
    lives are pointless, yet we continue in misery, nonetheless. But don't be
    overcome by a crushing sense of hopelessness and despair, because the next
    section of this FAQ has cute lil' happy faces! :-o

    ===========================================================================
    ============================ COMMON EMOTICONS =============================
    ===========================================================================

    For those newbies who haven't discovered "emoticons" or "smileys", here is a
    list of commonly used symbols which convey emotion. Look at them sideways,
    and voila`, a little face.

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------
    EMOTICON             MEANING
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------

    :-)                  happiness

    :-D                  very big grin

    :-(                  unhappiness

    ;-)                  irony or sarcasm

    :-O or :-()          shouting

    :-o                  astonishment

    8-[]                 evil laughter

    :-b...               drooling

    :-/ or :-\           skepticism

    <       >            used to express a specific state such as:

    ===========================================================================
    ============================= HELPFUL HINTS ===============================
    ===========================================================================

    Most of these suggestions are common sense things to do or avoid:

    1) When replying to articles, be sure to check the "reply-to:" line to see
    to which newsgroups your article will be sent. Eliminate any newsgroups on
    the line (it's called "trimming") that are not *relevent* to the post; it
    only takes about 10 seconds. If the reply is posted in an inappropriate
    newsgroup it'll only serve to clutter it, prompting ever more inappropriate
    replies and flames.

    EXAMPLE:

    A reply to a person who believes that Green-Eyed Albanian Lesbians are
    inferior really doesn't belong in news:alt.comics.batman or
    news:alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.bestiality, so trim those references.

    2) If someone posts an inappropriate article in this newsgroup, such as
    "Niggers are assholes" or some other such nonsense and you feel an
    overwhelming compulsion to become enmeshed in the futile "flame war", reply
    to the poster himself via e-mail, or eliminate the a.b.p.e.b reference in
    the "reply-to:" line. Otherwise it wastes time and space here. People are
    presumably here to see animals fucking humans and vice versa, not read
    racist prattle; there are numerous places for that elsewhere.

    3) If you would like to make a request for a certain picture, such as a
    woman giving fellatio to a squirrel, a useful convention for the subject
    header is:

    REQUEST: A picture of a woman blowing a squirrel.

    4) The Internet is rife with criminals and suckers. If you're a criminal,
    SMEG OFF!, but don't become a sucker -- unless you enjoy being screwed. On
    the net, as in life, no one gets something for nothing. If these miscreants
    were saints willing to serve others selflessly, I wager they wouldn't be
    here announcing it -- they'd be too busy doing missionary work in Peru. ;-)

    5) ATTN Me-too'ers: "Me too" comments are the most annoying things in
    USENET because they're utterly pointless and will not endear you to anyone.
    If some one has a goody that he wants to give you out of the kindness of his
    heart, *e-mail* him. If he's sincere he'll give you what you want -- or
    what you deserve.

    6) People purposely post provacative articles to get a rise out of others to
    make them look foolish; it's called "trolling". If you reply to such an
    article, you're the "troll". 'Nuff said. In a similar vein, people routinely
    offer "FREE XXX PIX VIA E-MAIL!!", which is nothing more than an a mutated
    form of the standard trolling message. I've experimentally replied to many of
    these messages via *e-mail* and not once has anyone sent me what they
    promised. However, I did receive messages from people who didn't know what
    the hell I was talking about, indicating forged e-mail addresses.

    7) Be cautious when downloading .zip, .exe, or other executable files, since
    they might contain viruses which are activated after you decode and run
    them. If an unknown executable file, like sodomy!.exe, mysteriously appears
    on your hard drive, *DON'T* run it, as it could be a virus. Invest in
    antivirus software and scan *all* downloaded uuecoded .zip, .exe, and other
    executable files, especially if they're from websites, FTP sites, or BBSes.

    8) I would advise against giving strangers any personal information such as
    your phone number, home address, etc. -- unless you want dozens of people
    harrassing you or an unstable loner stalking you. I know this is obvious to
    anyone with an IQ score above his shoe size, but I've seen people do these
    things elsewhere (like children, whose inept mommies and daddies should be
    monitoring them instead of watching bad network sitcoms).

    EXAMPLE:

    >>bubba@whitehouse.gov wrote:
    >>
    >>Does anybody want free pics of the first lady humping a cat? If so, post
    >>your home address and I'll send them to you.
    >
    >send me some.
    >

    me too. Please send to --

    Rube Suckerwood III
    123 Yokel St.
    Gullibleville, AL 01234

    9) If someone tries to be cute by uploading viruses to USENET, others are
    going to complain to his sysop (like me), probably leading to a revocation
    of his access. And if less-stable individuals find out who he is, bad things
    will happen to him. I've known many sysops who had no compunctions about
    ratting out some malicious smeghead who caused them trouble. You can find
    virus scanners at the following URL:

    http://www.cwsapps.com/virus.html

    10) When one of the "can't stand that someone, someplace, is having a good
    time" nitwits, e.g., Jesus's little crusaders, posts a "This is so disgusting
     . . . blah, blah, blah" message, ignore it. Don't give them the satisfaction
    of elevating their self-righteous screechings to the level of a valid
    discussion.

    If you absolutely must justify yourself to one of faith's victims, reply in
    *relevent* newsgroups (see hints 1 and 2) or e-mail the reply to *him*.
    People in binaries newsgroups are there for smutty pictures, not theological
    or philosophical debate with St. Augustine and Socrates wannabees.

    11) If you feel the need for "trolling", go to one of the non-binaries
    newsgroups, as you're more likely to get an amusing response there than here.
    Try news:alt.rush-limbaugh or news:alt.politics.radical-left for starters.
    Those newsgroups are filled with people who are utterly humorless, and should
    therefore provide a large number of trolls.

    12) If someone posts something you appreciate, let him know via e-mail.
    People are quick to lavish insults upon others, but seldom express gratitude,
    which results in more lurking and less contributing for fear of denunciation
    by the idle BIG MOUTHS.

    13) Unless you want the idle BIG MOUTHS shrieking incoherently at you, don't
    repost a file that has been posted within the last week or so, especially if
    you've renamed it. Some people can't stand downloading a file they already
    have. Personally I don't care, since I pay about 29 cents per hour for access
    time, so I'm just looking out for you babes in the woods is all. ;-)

    14) If you're sick of spams and scams -- especially scams -- don't be afraid
    to forward a copy of the perpetrator's message to his (it's more often than
    not a male) internet service provider's system administrator. One or two
    messages will probably be ignored, but a few dozen should prompt the results
    we want: the termination of the spamming and scamming from that particular
    account. These perpetrators lose their accounts all the time, so don't think
    sending a message is futile.

    ===========================================================================
    ============================ ADDITIONAL COMMENTS ==========================
    ===========================================================================

    If you've made it this far (you're a glutton for punishment :-) ) you should
    have an understanding of the basics. If you have any comments, suggestions,
    or questions pertaining to this FAQ (or a picture of a woman blowing a
    squirrel), feel free to e-mail me.