# Animal Erotica in Other TV Series

### A&E's Top 10

- Dogs for the Family: 42:13-42:17 (poodle-t3)

### All Creatures Great and Small (the BBC series based on James Herriot's books)

I don't recall episode dates and titles, but there were a number of interesting scenes. The vets were always delivering lambs, calves, and foals, so there were a lot of birth scenes, and scenes where one or more of the actors was shown with his arm fully inside a cow or whatever. Herriot mistakenly starts to check a bull for mastitis, and there is a close-up of the scrotum. A dog owner, embarrassed to mention the word "penis" in front of Herriot's wife, tells Herriot "there's something wrong with his...'pencil.'" A urinating cow is seen from the rear, and I'm sure there were numerous urination and defecation scenes all through the series. Tristan Farnon collects semen from a bull, but the scene was not explicit (dang! :). Mrs. Pumphrey has a pet pig at one point, and she complains about the way he urinates "in fits and starts"; Herriot assures her that's normal for a male pig. (I think that part was only in the book, though.) If any of you recall other scenes I've missed, let me know.

### America's Funniest Home Videos: Uncensored

One viewer reports: "The newest America's Funniest Home Videos video may be of interest to you. It is called America's Funniest Home Videos: Uncensored, and that it is. As well as some disgusting human scenes, there are several zoophilic scenes, both near the beginning of the show and near the end. Including:

- An elephant with its trunk up another's arse to eat its dung.
- Several scenes of dogs trying to hump stuffed toys.
- A pig with an 'unhealthy' liking for a horse.
- A rabbit trying to make love to a cat (with a few hilarious captions)
- A bull mounting an unsuspecting farmer.
- A rabbit with a liking for a man's hair (what is it with lops?)
- A walrus who decided to masterbate for the camera.

And others. Very interesting all in all, and very funny as well, if you don't mind the disgusting humans."

(This isn't really a "series," per se, but I didn't know what other webpage to list it on. And since this item was listed, I have seen it myself, and there are indeed some good scenes as he mentions above. --Actaeon)

### America's Most Wanted: America Fights Back

- "A report on dogs who take a bite out of crime as courageous K-9 cops, including their training regiments and the dog of the year": N

### Banned in America

Note: This is NOT the mail-order video, but a syndicated series on FOX.

- Banned in America: The World's Sexiest Commercials 2: N

### Bewitched

- "Playmates": N
  Tabitha turns a young bully into a bulldog (an intact male).

### Biography (a series on A&E)

- Caligula--Reign of Madness: N

### Brady Bunch

- Getting Greg's Goat: N

### Charmed (syndicated; WB)

"Animal Pragmatism": N

### Coach

"MZ" reports: "Quincy for the most part is played by a female basset hound."

### Conan O'Brien

"A.C." reports: "Gut-busting ongoing skits about the show's mascot, Masturbating Bear."

### The Daily Show (Comedy Central)

"AJ" reports: "I don't recall which season or episode, but [this series] did a segment on animal husbandry where two women masturbate a pig for artificial insemination. Of course we don't see much, (more than we expected,) but there is a good shot of a BIG bag o' um... Pig Seed. (This is their most very hilarious bit, and I bet they'll never run it again. :)" He also says the show "regularly shows a birthing Rhino during the opening credits."

### Dateline NBC

On the November 14, 1997 episode, there is a short segment on canine gyms. A female miniature poodle is seen very briefly from the rear as she walks on a treadmill; her vulva is visible for an instant. Also, an intact male German Shepherd is showing a little pink as he sits on his owner's balcony. Neither scene is good enough to be worth taping, however.

### Dharma and Greg

"MZ" reports: [In the pilot episode] "Mumzudio is played by an intact male Welsh Corgi. Dharma holds him up in front of the camera for everyone to see. The gender of Stinky (the long haired dog) will forever remain a mystery. It is rare to see these dogs standing up."

### Due South

"J.T." reports: "One of my personal favorites is Diefenbaker on 'Due South.' He's supposed to be a wolf (mostly) but he's actually an intact male Siberian Husky. There's a really great, full frontal pic of him at www.ozemail.com.au/~klyons/dsouth/ds-pgdf1.jpg. Showin' just a little pink there...

### Early Edition (a TV drama series)

I haven't been following the series for a long time, but the female lead character is blind, and her guide dog is a male German Shepherd named "Spike." I can't tell if he's intact, but he's very sexy and definitely worth a look. :)

### Empty Nest

"J" reports: "In opening credits in one of the later seasons, you can see Dreyfuss lying on his back with his sheath and testes in plain view."

### Fantasy Island (ABC, 1998, w/Malcolm McDowell)

In the 11/8/1998 episode, a stockbroker falls for a woman who's really a dolphin. Only one brief slit shot, when the dolphin jumps out of the water and heads away from the camera. Just before that, as the dolphin is swimming away on its back, they missed a wonderful opportunity for an extended slit shot, but the dolphin never rose far enough above the water, so its belly was always covered. Bummer. :'(

### Flipper (the original series from the 1960's)

- Dolphin for Sale: N
- The Lady and the Dolphin: N

### Flipper (the new series)

In many episodes, one or more dolphins may swim by with genital slits visible. One recurring scene (where Flipper is tail-walking backwards in the ocean) clearly shows a dolphin with a "pink-belly," which is a sign of sexual arousal. Since the episodes are not named, it's tough to give a listing of good ones, although the episode described as "Aphrodite goes into labor during a hurricane" has more slit scenes than usual, plus (naturally) a birth scene.

BTW, there is also a spin-off of this series on WB starring Whip Hubley and Elizabeth Morehead. I've only seen one episode; same old stuff.

### 48 Hours (the weekly network news broadcast)

Animal Intelligence: N

In the "Animal ER" episode (originally aired 4/24/97; repeated on The Learning Channel on 2/3/99), one of the animals featured was an intact male Sicilian Mastiff. While his owner was petting him, the dog was showing pink (about three inches' worth), and the camera kept panning back and forth between the human and the dog, so that the penis was shown not merely once, but three times. [Thanks Dogdude]

### FOX Files (FOX)

In the episode airing 12/17/98, the closing segment "Heros and Zeros" included a tigress getting some dental work done; she was under anaesthetic, lying on her back, and as the camera panned up her body, her anus and vulva were briefly visible.

### Frasier

"J" reports: "Despite what the plot says, Eddie is NOT castrated. He remains an intact dog. I stopped watching the TV show in disgust where they put his castration as a major show theme."

### Frontline

"A Whale of a Business" (11/11/97): a few very brief slit shots of orcas, the best of which is at 49:33.

### Full House

Comet is a female dog. [Thanks J.]

### The Jon Stewart Show (syndicated, cancelled)

"AGPLDB" reports: "There was a skit called 'The 'Grind' at the DogHouse.' It featured Jon dancing with a bunch of dogs. But what made it cool was that most of the dogs were mating. There were close-ups. It only aired once in 1994."

### Life Goes On

"J" reports: "Arnold the Semi-Wonder Dog is a large intact white male dog. He's present in the credits of every show. You can see his sheath and testes up close every time. What a sweet sexy dog."

### Little House on the Prairie

"John" reports: "On almost every episode, a horse is seen to be 'hanging out.' It's probably worthwhile to consider taping the series and using Snappy to capture the image."
Starbuck reports that in the episode "The Race," Laura's mare Bunny is played by a very definitely male horse, who has a fairly good partial erection in a couple scenes.

### Mad About You

- An Angel for Murray: N
- The Last Scampi: N
- Murray at the Dog Show: N
- In the "Ovulation Day" episode, there is "quite a good horse mating scene." (Thanks Wolfie)

### Malcolm in the Middle (FOX)

- Sleepover: lions-c3
  About halfway through the episode, Malcolm's parents are watching a nature documentary on TV, and get turned on when they see lions mate.

### Married...with Children

- Near the end of the episode in which Bud and Kelly buy a car (a VW Thing, to be precise) for $800, there's a brief view of a Doberman's rear end. It only lasts a split-second, and when I freeze-framed it, I couldn't even tell if it was a male or female. Not as good a shot as I'd hoped for.
- In the episode described as "Buck buries the necklace Al buys for Peggy's anniversary," Buck the dog meets up with a female dog named Bibi. The voice-overs are as follows:

  > Bibi: "Don't you remember our second anniversary?"
  > Buck: "Uh, sure, um, ..."
  > Bibi: "Bibi!"
  > Buck: "Oh, of course. It's just that I rarely see this end of you."
  > (After a little more dialogue, Bibi heads upstairs, and Buck watches her go. The camera follows her hind end -- not a close-up, though :).
  > Buck: "Oh! Bibi! Now I remember you." He looks at the camera. "And they say I'm senile." Then he follows her up the stairs.

- In the episode in which Buck runs away and gets locked in the pound, there are numerous sexual innuendoes, some involving humans. One dog is introduced as having belonged to Madonna: "After the book came out, he turned himself in." A black and white dog (whose sheath opening can be seen through the fence as he speaks) starts to warn him, "There's something you ought to know about this place," and Buck responds, "Hey...I'm not anyone's bitch, okay?" The black & white replies, "Too bad, though; he is a looker." Of Kelly, Buck says, "I wouldn't have any use for her at all if she didn't undress in front of me." And when visitors come to call after the first commercial, the first dog they meet is an intact male German Shepherd, who rears up a little (swoon!).
- "J" reports: "In the two-part series where the Bundies go to Europe, Buck is sent to the kennels. One of the other male dogs in the kennel offers to have sex with him."
- "J" reports: In one episode, "Peggy throws a birthday party for their adopted son (who only existed for one season). Buck has sex with the pony they rented. Trouble is that the pony is actually male instead of female."

### Meego {cancelled}

The terrier in the show appears to have been a female Jack Russell Terrier. [Thanks J.]

### National Championship Dog Shows (Animal Planet)

- Cleveland, Ohio, January 2000 (Finals): N
- Houston, Texas, August 1999: 9:34-9:49 (basenji-a2), 31:18-31:23 (Chesapeake Bay Retriever-t/a2), 31:36-31:39 (Chesapeake Bay Retriever-t/a3), 36:44-36:49 (American Staffordshire Bull Terrier-t/a3)
  Whoever did the video editing cut out nearly all the going-away shots, so there were very few rear views. Interestingly, though, both the basenji and the Chessie won their respective classes. Coincidence? I think "knot." :)

### Next Step (used to be rerun on the Discovery Channel)

Black Dragon reports: "...there is a section, just prior to some ads, where Paul and Phil ("The Anwser Guys") are shown sitting with two very large, very male dogs (St. Bernards I think). The one on the right side is apparently VERY happy, and is showing pink. ;) (It's one of thoose things where until you notice it the first time, you just don't see it; and after, can't NOT see it every time after.)"

### Norm (a sitcom starring Norm McDonald)

- "Norm Pimps Weiner Dog": N (several references to bestiality and animal sex, though)

### Northern Exposure

- The episode in which Holling hunts Jessie: 50~ (bear-s,t)

### The Profiler (a TV drama series)

"The Profiler" premiered the same night as "Early Edition" and also features a male German Shepherd named "Denzel." He is very much intact, although you need freeze-frame to prove it: when he zooms around a corner and slides on a carpet you can see some testes swinging in the breeze. Nummy. I really need to get into Hollywood. :)
WolfFur reports: "[There was] an episode of Profiler (I am about 94% sure that it is the episode entitled 'Victim of Victims,' the 8th episode of the 2nd season, with an original airdate of Jan 17, 1998) in which Sam, at the end, is attempting to rescue a woman, who is tied to a bed, from a pack of vicious *male* dogs. She calms them by getting on her hands and knees and rubbing her head under the alpha's neck."

### Quantum Leap (the series with Scott Bakula(?))

In the episode where Sam leaps into a photographer, they are doing a shoot at the end of the episode involving a male lion. I can't remember if you ever see his sheath, but one part of a scene is shot from directly behind the lion and you can clearly see his intact scrotum and testicles.

### Real Sex Xtra (HBO)

Real Sex Xtra: Best of Real Sex: N

### RealTV

In the November 10, 1997 episode, they show a herd of bull elk descending on the town of Mammoth, Montana; there are numerous scenes of bulls urinating, and a couple shots of a partial erection.

### Saturday Night Live

"DH" reports: "There is one sketch with [David Spade?]...walking his friend [Kevin McDonald?], who is dressed in a dog costume, and they put him in a group of other dogs, and he tries to hump several of them (I think at least one was male).... The woman who was there with her dog was very offended at the depravity."

Pawz reports: "There was a skit (year unknown) where a male (neutered I believe), probably a pit bull was barking and the sheath could be seen very nicely bouncing when he barked =)"

### Seinfeld

- (the episode in which Jerry has to baby-sit a large dog): N (the dog is never actually seen)

### Sex in the 90's (MTV)

"A.C." reports: [in one episode] "There is a scene where it shows a bull rhino falling off of a cow in either exaustion or a case of lost balance."

### Shock Video: Turn-On TV (HBO)

"The sultriest and sexiest soap operas, game shows and talk shows are gathered from around the world."

- Shock Video 4: Turn-On TV 1996
  This episode (which was repeated on HBO on 7/6/99) includes a Belgian cartoon in which a gorilla rapes a woman, and a German cartoon about animal sexuality.
- Shock Video 5: Turn-On TV 1997
  This episode (which was repeated on HBO on 5/27/99) features an emu who almost succeeds in making love with a man (apparently, emus really do get aroused by humans IRL), and a nude woman being photographed holding a horse's semi-erect penis.
- Shock Video 6: Turn-On TV 1998
  This episode (which was repeated on HBO on 2/3/00) had some people dressing as animals, but that's it.
- Shock Video 2001 -- A Sex Odyssey
  This episode (which aired on 12/16/00) included several items of interest.
  First, some clips of mating cats, humping dogs, and elephant blow jobs, from a Russian TV show described as "TV Moscow's weekly Friday night show, a family favorite which airs on commercial television during prime time" and whose name appears to be "KTOELO OV YKTEPTn," with the O's being the slashed variety (except for the last one in KTOELO, which has a vertical bar coming from the top right), and the "n" at the end being the "pi" symbol. If there's anyone out there from Russia who can get copies of this to me in either PAL, SECAM or NTSC, let me know.
  Next, from France's "Tournage X," some men dressed in pig masks have sex with some women they have "captured."
  Next, from England's "The Wonderful World of Sex," scenes of a nude lap dancer riding a large white horse.
  Later, an Australian Renault commercial in which a rhino has sex with an SUV.

### Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

- "Little Green Men": "J" reports, "In this episode, Odo takes the form of a German Shepherd and mounts Quark from the front before he shape-shifts back to human form." [The dog is male, but we can't tell if he's intact. Nevertheless, I sure wanted to be in Quark's shoes. :) -- Actaeon]

### Star Trek: The Next Generation

- "Aquiel": "J" reports: "In this episode, Maura is a female Samoyed who was befriended by LaForge. Maura was actually a shape shifting monster and was killed. Maura began to make advances on LaForge to lure him to his death."
- "Time's Arrow, Part II." na509528@anon.penet.fi reports: "You will see some stock footage of a horse and buggy walking by. In this case however, you will see that the horse is walking by with a full erection! Later on, you will see the same horse again, this time he isn't as 'hung.'" [The first scene is about 14 minutes in, just after Twain promises to stop Data and Guinan's "plot." I didn't see any more horse penises after that.-- Actaeon]

### Swift Justice

- (the episode described as "A beautiful horse trainer asks Swift to investigate the death of a champion race horse"): N

### Third Rock from the Sun

- "J" reports: In "Green Eyed Dick," from the first season, Harry adopts a male terrier, holds the dog up in front of him with the sheath clearly visible and proclaims, "This IS love."
- "J" reports: In "Big Angry Virgin from Outer Space," Dick reveals one of his pornographic obsessions... watching "Homeward Bound the Incredible Journey."
- "MZ" reports: "Dr. Albright gives back Dick the dog he gave her as a gift. The dog is an intact male [yellow] Lab who has a very inviting anus." (episode title "Jailhouse Dick") Also, at the end of the episode, when Sally returns the dog (whose name is "Pepper") to Dr. Albright, he shows his happiness to see her by humping her leg enthusiastically.
- About 20 minutes into the episode "15 Minutes of Dick," Pepper humps Dr. Albright's leg again, but just for a split second during a transition, where one scene fades into another.

### "30 milions d'amis" ("30 Million Friends")

Echse reports: "French TV programm TV5 has this series every Sunday morning (10 am CET). Every now and then it happens to show a full horse or a close image of a horse tail and beyond it; it seems that they don't worry so much about having "exciting" images in their films." Horses: ( A~, B~, C~, P~, S, V~, I~, T~); dogs: ( S ); sometimes bovines: ( A~, B~, C~, P~, S, V~, I~, T~, N)

### Thunder Alley {cancelled, but might be found on the Disney channel}

The Bulldog is female and has a very large vulva. [Thanks J.]

### Turning Point

There's nothing explicit in the episode entitled "Unlocking the Mystery: the Amazing Animal Mind," but there are some wonderful scenes of entertainer Roy Horn (of Siegfried and Roy) interacting with his big cats. I sure envy him. :)

### Walt Disney Presents

Pancho, Fastest Paw in the West: N?
Pancho is an intact male Yellow Lab (mix?); I didnšt see anything spectacular, but I didnšt watch the show that closely.

### Wishbone

"J" reports: "Wishbone is an intact male Jack Russell Terrier. When he isn't dressed, his sheath and testes are little jewels to see." Because he's a short-haired dog, filmed from a low angle, his anus and genitals are briefly visible in nearly every episode, but they usually pan or cut away from close-ups.

- "J" reports: "In the episode where they act out 'The Midas Touch,' you can see Wishbone's penis. This is the part where Joe brings in all of the groceries and Wishbone begins to stoop and scratch himself. You will see a finger of pink slip right out."
- Twisted Tail ("Oliver Twist"): Wishbone pees on a motorcycle tire. No genitals are shown, and the stream of liquid is undoubtedly water.
- A Bone of Contention ("The Courtship of Miles Standish"): N
- Halloween Hound, Part 1 ("The Legend of Sleepy Hollow"): N
- Mixed Breeds ("Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde"): N
- The Pawloined Paper ("The Purloined Letter"): N
- The Slobbery Hound ("The Hound of the Baskervilles"): N
  (BTW, the "male" bloodhound is actually female)

### Wonder Woman

- The Deadly Dolphin: N

### The World's Funniest [COMM]

Note: This is a syndicated series, hosted by Jim Brown; it's aired on FOX and PAX. Episodes are normally untitled, so any descriptions here are from TV schedules.

In an episode opening with a spaniel who keeps falling asleep, a poodle French-kisses a monkey, and a dog and cat are shown in bed together, with suggestive dialogue from the narrator.)

In an episode dedicated to animals, we see a (presumably male) puppy rubbing his genitals against a carpet, and an intact male Wiemeraner whose anus and testes are occasionally visible as he spins around in the bed of a pickup.

Here are some episodes (possibly spin-offs) which did have titles in the TV schedules):

- Animal Salute: 16:24-16:27 (dog-u3)
- The Funniest of the World's Funniest: 21:22-21:45 (whitetail buck mounting a plaster deer lawn ornament)
- Private Parts: 9:28-9:33 (lion-u2)
- The World's Funniest Animals: N
- World's Funniest! Animal Salute No. 2: 5:38-5:54 (dog-u2), 12:33-12:46 (elphant-p3)

### The World's Greatest Animal Outtakes Unleashed [COMM]

(Note: this series is a spin-off of "The World's Funniest," with the same host.)

An intact male dog (spaniel?) pees on a bag of dog food at 38:30. There are also a couple of zooish scenes: a fashion commercial in which a Great Dane appears to seduce a woman, and a news report where a buck deer nuzzles and then mounts a reporter.

In the sequel "The World's Greatest Animal Outtakes Unleashed 2," a calf pees on a reporter, a puppy urinates during a fashion show, and there are three suggestive commercials: a dog food ad in which an off-screen dog is supposedly humping the salesman's leg, a pro-neutering ad in which a dog is told not to have sex, and an anti-smoking ad in which various animals are shown from the rear. Seriously.

### Xena: Warrior Princess

There are at least two episodes of Xena which may be of interest to zoos. In one episode, Xena falls to the ground beneath a male centaur. She looks up, and we can tell by her facial expression she is pleased with what she sees. Another episode focuses on the revulsion people feel when a woman bears a centaur's child. Xena fights for them, and the episode is ultimately uplifting, implying a cross-species relationship is not by definition inferior.

### Contributions are welcome: E-mail Actaeon

Overview | Animated | Art | Censor | Comic | Comm | IndDoc | Instr | Net | Lit | Movie | MusVid | SerDoc | TV Shows | Toys | VidGam

Index -- Updated Wednesday, January 10, 2001 -- E-mail Actaeon