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    Alt.sex.bestiality P.I.P.s, Version A-01-01-12
    [Zoophilia in Music and Art]                         Revised January 12, 2001
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    [ Contributors to this section are listed at the end of this document. ]

    Welcome to the PIP with culture!  Please excuse the mess as this section
    will always be under construction.  If you have a contribution for this
    section, or you would like to do research on a topic covered in this
    section, please contact Actaeon (actaeon@iname.com).

    =================================[A - MUSIC]=================================

    1 - Vintage Vinyl
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    o-- Beatles, "Dig A Pony"
        ["Let It Be," EMI Records]
        "I-I-I dig a pony,
         Well you can celebrate anything you want.
         Yes, you can celebrate anything you want."

    o-- Disturbingly Lonesome Cowboys, "Ol' Blue"
        ["Diesel Dykes Of Dixie," Ghostdancer Records]
        "I came into the house, just as still as a mouse,
         filled with a burnin' dread.
         What was eatin' on me, was your cheatin' on me,
         there was red hair in my bed.
         I kinda figgur'd he'd be stonger and bigger,
         I had some prints to this warty ol' frog.
         But the least I'd 'a thought, when you were caught,
         you'd be humpin' my huntin' dog.

         Honey why'd ya fuck Ol' Blue?
         What'd he ever do to you?
         He was a good ol' pup 'til you fucked 'im up.
         Why'd ya fuck Ol' Blue?  Honey, why'd ya fuck ol' Blue?"

    o-- The Dayglo Abortions, "Two Dogs Fucking"
        ["Two Dogs Fucking / Deux Chien Fourrent," Fringe Product, Inc.]
        "The mayor of Nipean went for a walk in the park
         to admire the beauty of his man-made nature.
         He came upon a site that made his blood run cold
         So he called upon the Mighty Lord to help him with his foe,
         it was

         Two dogs fucking,
         stuck ass to ass,
         entwined in bestial romance!

         It was obscene so he called the police.
         They sent an officer named Jim Fitzgibbons.
         They came up with a plan that involved a bucket of cold water
         to be thrown on the fornicating demons,
         but they had to face

         Two dogs fucking,
         stuck ass to ass,
         entwined in bestial romance!"

    o-- Wynonie Harris, "Keep On Churnin'"
        ["Bloodshot Eyes, The Best of Wynonie Harris," Rhino Records]
        ["Risque Rhythm; Nasty 50's R&B," Rhino Records]

        "Keep on churnin' 'til the butter comes.
         Keep on churnin' 'til the butter comes.
         Keep on pumpin make the butter flow,
         Wipe off the paddle and churn some more.

         Little Boy Blue come blow your horn,
         Cows in the meadow, the sheep's in the corn.
         Take the sheep, leave them be,
         Bring the finest brown cow to me.

         CHORUS

         How now, brown cow, keep on eatin your hay,
         Go in your shed, be sure you're fed.
         Go in your shed, be sure you're fed,
         Daddy needs butter for his shortnin bread.

         CHORUS

         Ooo now, milk cow, keep on swishin your tail,
         Don't kick over the pail.
         First comes the milk, then comes the cream,
         Takes good butter to make your daddy scream.

         CHORUS

         I wanted some butter one day,
         Fine brown cow came my way.
         We kept on pumpin",
         Butter came jumpin.
         I'll milk you, cow, 'til my pail is full,
         Look out, heifer, here comes your bull!"

    o-- Lee Dorsey, "Ride Your Pony"
        ["A History of New Orleans Rhythm and Blues," Rhino Records]
        "Ride your Pony,
         Get on your pony and ride.
         Ride your Pony,
         Get on your pony and ride!  Oh you're ridin' high.

         Get ready now shoot, shoot, shoot."

    o-- The Galaxies and The Regulars, "Ride Your Horse"
        ["Land Of A Thousand Dunces," Candy Records]
        (Whinney)  "Ride your horse!
         Who's gonna ride horse? (women's voices)
         We're gonna ride horse! (men's voices)
         We want a tame horse! (women's voices)
         We want a wild horse! (men's voices)
         Ride your horse a little while, (women's
         you can do it cowboy style.      voices)
         Everybody's gonna ride horse!"  (all together)

    o-- Kinky Friedman and The Texas Jewboys, "Asshole From El Paso"
        ["Old Testaments and New Revelations," Fruit of the Tune]
        "We don't wipe our asses on ol' glory.
         God and Lone Star Beer are things we trust!
         We keep our women virgins 'til they're married.
         So ho's and sheep is good enough for us.

         And I'm proud to be an Asshole from El Paso,
         place where sweet young virgins are deflowered.
         You walk down the street knee-deep in tacos,
         and the wetbacks still get twenty cents an hour."

    o-- Johnny Bucket, "Let Me Play Wit' Yo' Poodle"
        ["Sin Alley, Part One," Crypt CD]
        "Now your little poodle look kinda cute an' neat,
         I wonder what it'd do wit' some home fried meat.

         I wanna play wit' yo' poodle.
         Please let me play wit' yo' poodle.
         I wanna play wit' yo' poodle,
         I mean your little poodle dog."

    o-- P.D.Q. Bach, "Missa Hilarious" by P.D.Q.Bach on
        ["Portrait of P.D.Q.Bach," Vanguard Records]
        "Angus Dei!
         Angus Dei!

         She looks so nice just standing there,
         All covered with the dew.

         Angus Dei!
         Angus Dei!

         She's the prettiest cow I've ever seen,
         And I have seen a few!"

    o-- Pearl Jam, "Animal"
        Album: "Vs."
        "I'd rather be with an animal."

    o-- Def Leppard, "Animal"
        ["Hysteria," PolyGram Records, Copyright 1987]
        "And I want, and I need, and I love, Animal."

    o-- Front 242, "Zoo Animal"
        [Album name and label unknown]
        "When I look in the mirror,
         all that I see is a zoo animal that wants to be free,
         just get away, get away from me,
         'cause I'll never be who you want me to be."

    o-- Paul McCartney, "Jet" (Written for a female dog)
        ["Band on the Run", probably Capitol Records]
        "Our maker, I want Jet to always love me.
         Our maker, you know I want little Jet to always love me.
         Our maker, I wouldn't trade her...
         Sufferin' Jet!"

    o-- The Beatles, "Martha my dear" (also written for a dog)
        "Take a good look around you
         And you will see
         That you and me
         Were meant to be
         For each other
         Silly girl."

    o-- The Byrds, "Chestnut Mare"
        ["Untitled," Columbia records (LP G-30127 / 45 4-45259)]
        "Always alone; never with the herd.
         Prettiest mare I've ever seen;
         Have to take my word.
         I'm gonna catch that horse if i can;
         And when i do i'll give her my brand;
         And we'll be friends for life;
         She'll be just like a wife.
         I'm gonna catch that horse if I can."

    o-- Phish, "Llama"
        [Album name and label unknown]
        (Lyrics unavailable)

    o-- W.A.S.P., "Animal (Fuck like a Beast)"
        ["Animal (Fuck like a Beast), label unknown]
        Lyrics unavailable.
        W.A.S.P., which stands for either "White Anglo Saxon Perverts" or
        "We Are Sexual Perverts" depending on who you ask, built a reputation
        for anything-goes 'psycho drama' stage performances and very disturbing
        heavy metal songs, until they were banned from just about everywhere.
        Their record company dropped their contract rather than release
        "Animal (Fuck like a Beast)", but the album was rescued by an
        independant label and became W.A.S.P.'s greatest hit.

    o-- Inspiral Carpets, "I Can't Feel You Moo"
        [Album name and label unknown]
        (Lyrics unavailable]

    o-- Prince, "Alphabet Street" from Lovesexy, by Prince
        ["Lovesexy," label unknown]
        "You kiss your enemies like you know you should,
         then you jerk your body like a horny pony would."

    o-- Timbuk 3, "Sample the Dog"
        ["Eden Alley," label unknown]

        "There's a new age family down in North Caroline..
         A dog named Jamaica,
         A daughter named China,
         A son that plays in a band, called Sample the Dog

         New age music on the stereo,
         Dust on the keys of the piano.
         And China's in the kitchen, tryin' to sample the dog.

         Sample the dog... (sounds of sampled dog, barking...)"

    o-- Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention, "Dirty Love"
        ["Overnight Sensation," label unknown]

        "Give me your dirty love
         Just like your mama make her fuzzy poodle do.
         Give me your dirty love
         The way your mama make that nasty poodle chew.

         THE POODLE BITES! (Come on, Frenchie)
         THE POODLE CHEWS IT! (Snap it!)
         THE POODLE BITES! (Come on, Frenchie)
         THE POODLE CHEWS IT! (Snap it!)

         [Continue to fade, including comments such as...]

         (Not a speck of cereal)
         (Nothin but the best for my dog!)
         (Little paws stickin' up)
         (Little curly head)

    o-- The Fugs, "Homemade/My Baby Done Left Me (And I Feel Like Homemade Shit)"
        ["Golden Filth: The Best of the Fugs (Reprise)," label unknown]

        In this hilarious spoof of country weepers, Ed Sanders sings
        about all the things he is willing to do if only "Claire June"
        will come back, one of which is "Gonna give up heifer fuckin'"

    o-- The Fugs, "Dog Style Diversion" from the "Virgin Forest" medley.
        (The Fugs - ESP Records 1028, 1966.)
        Essentially a spoken word tune with groans,yelps, and ooo's by Ken
        Weaver and Betsy Klein... jungle drums in the background...  Ken makes
        it with a female chimpanzee.

    o-- The Fugs, "The Fug's Rehersal - I Fucked a Chicken in the 60's
                   (But now I'm the Dean of The Medical School)"
        (The Fugs, Olufsen Records DOC 5009, 1984)
        ...self explanatory.

    o-- Nine Inch Richards, "Closer"
        ["Closer to Hogs," Shock Records (PO Box 434, Richmond 3121, Australia)
                           and Leaving Hope/TVT Music, Inc., ASCAP]

        "I wanna fuck you like an animal,
         I wanna feel you from the inside"

        From what I've been told this album contains quite a few little gems but
        some of the more interesting send up's I've been told of include lines
        like; "Did I tell you I knew Lassie...personally?!", "I really go for a
        cow in tight leather" and "You know I reckon Noah's Ark would have been
        just like the Love Boat."

        On the insde of the CD jacket the disclaimer reads, "It is not our
        intention to promote wanton sex with animals. (We believe that an
        emotional component is necessary for successful relationships between
        consenting animals.)"

    o-- John Denver, "Grandma's Feather Bed"
        ["Back Home Again," RCA]
        "It was nine feet high and six feet wide,
         soft as a downy chick.
         It was made from the feathers of fourty-'leven geese,
         took a whole bolt of cloth for a tick.
         It'd hold eight kids and four hound dogs
         and a piggie we'd stole from the shed.
         We didn't get much sleep but we had a lot of fun
         on grandma's feather bed."

    o--  Queen, "Delilah"
         ["Innuendo," Hollywood Records]
         In a love song to his cat, Freddie Mercury verses;
         "Delilah, I love you, you make me so very happy,
          you give me kisses and i go out of my mind"

    o--  Peter Schickele, (P.D.Q. Bach), "Oedipus Tex: Finale"
         ["Oedipus Tex and Other Choral Calamities," Telarc (CD-80239)]
         [Review by Snufferbux (an84518@anon.penet.fi)]

         Only PDQ Bach could take the story of Oedipus Rex and make
         a western out of it.  Imagine Oedipus as a drifting cowboy,
         early on in the piece he sings:

         "Lately my thoughts have been driftin' towards the ladies.
          Now, don't get me wrong, I love my pony best of all."

         Well, after the whole sordid story of incest, suicide, and
         self mutilation had been told (sounds like something from
         a.s.stories, doesn't it? :), the moral is presented in the
         finale:

         "Well the moral of the story is, of course,
          Don't love your mother, pardner, save it for your horse.
          I guarantee you will be filled with great remorse
          If you give your mama love you should be saving for your horse.

          Save it for your horse!
          Save it for your horse!
          Don't be a prisoner of remorse,
          Take your love and save it, save it, save it for your horse!"

         (Repeat with minor variations to end.)

    o--  Frank Zappa, "Babette"
         ["You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore, Volume 1" Rykodisc (RCD 10081)]
         "The 1974 band had nightly routines, also...improvised 'folkloric
          news flashes' dealing with the previous day's road activities which,
          in some instances, bordered on science fiction."

         The song is about a supposed affair between the band's road manager
         and Babette, a dog.

    o--  Frank Zappa, "The Hounds"
         ["Puttin' On The Dog" (CBS Records, 1979)]

         "Horses

         I was into horses long before you caught my eye.
            Lunging through the forest, gripped the passion of the ride.
         Lying in the sunshine just before a summer storm.
            Took you for the first time.  Rode the finest flesh of all

         (refrain)
         I like horses -- won't you take me for a ride?
         I like horses -- won't you take me for a ride?
         I'm your rider -- you'll let me ride you tonight.

         Swing into the saddle, love to see your nostrils flare.
           Clinging tightly to you, I get tangled in your hair

         (refrain)

         Now we're back and flying.  Tears of joy run down your face
           With me r'underneath me, don't you know you'll win the race?

    o-- Frank Zappa, "Moving to Montana"
        (album and label unknown)

        "Well I might ride along the border
         with my tweezers gleaming in the moonlight-y night
         And then I'd get a cup of coffee
         and give my foot a push
         Just me and the pygmy pony
         over by the dental floss bush!"

    o--  Cat Stevens, "I love my dog"
         ["The very best of Cat Stevens", Island Records]
         Excerpts:
         ...I love my dog as much as I love you...
         ...all he ever needs is love, and that he knows he will get...

    o--  The Allman Brother's Band, "Midnight Rider"
         ["Idlewild South" and "A Decade of The Allman Brother's Band"]
         [label(s) unknown]
         Although not truly a zoo'ish song, it was brought to my attention that
         this was as perfect a 'Fence Jumper's Anthem' as you could find!  So
         the Allmans have earned themselves an honourable mention :)

         "But I'm not gonna let 'em catch me, no,
          Not gonna let 'em catch the midnight rider."

    o--  The Cramps, "Can your pussy do the dog?"
         (Big Beat Records, 1985)
         Lyrics unavailable.

    o-- Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Naked In The Rain"
        ["Blood Sugar Sex Magik," Warner Bros]
        (...)
        Naked in the rain with a killer whale
        I can taste the salt when I lick his tail

        Naked in the rain
        Doctor Doolittle, what's your secret?
        Give it to me doctor, don't keep it

        I never met an animal that I didn't like
        You can come to me, I won't bite
        Don't you know dog is man's best friend?
        There is some love that you can't fight
        (...)

    o-- The Cure, "All I Want"
        ["Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me," Elektra, 1987]

       "Tonight I'm feeling like an animal
        Tonight I'm howling inside
        Tonight I'm feeling like an animal
        Tonight I'm going wild

        And all I want is to be with you again
        And all I want is to hold you like a dog
        And all I want is to be with you again
        With you again
        Just to hold you like a dog"

    o-- The Cross, "Love On A Tightrope (Like An Animal)"
        ["Shove It," Virgin Records]

       "Love on a lead is what you need
        Love on a leash is what you wish
        Love on a tightrope is what you get
        Love on a steep slope, you ain't seen nothing yet

        Be my dog, be my pet
        Like a nervous tic you just won't quit
        Like a nervous tic you just won't quit
        You don't need a doctor, you need a vet

        Like a tiger cat you're where it's at
        Like a crocodile along the Nile
        So strange and wild, some kind of reptile
        Love on a lead is what you need

        Animal eyes - like a real good time
        Animal lips - it's a perfect crime
        Animal hait - it just ain't fair
        Like an animal
        You're an animal"

    o-- Tori Amos' albums seem to have an undercurrent of wildness/zooness
        about them; nothing obvious in her songs, but in "Under the Pink"
        she thanks "the wolf' in her dedications. More specifically, included
        in the art of "Boys for Pele" is a fantastic photo of Tori, suckling
        a piglet at her breast.

    o-- Leonard Cohen, "Ballad of the absent mare"
        ["Recent Songs," Stranger Music Inc. BMI, 1979; Columbia 474750]

        The most wonderful equine romance I ever heard in public. Lovely. And
        very zooish. Leonard Cohen is a canadian poet. Lyrics are copyrighted,
        so only short citation for taste:

       "And he leans on her neck
        and he whispers low
        Wither thou goest
        I will go"

    o-- In the beginning of the new Rolling Stones video for "Anybody Seen My
        Baby," Ron Wood acts the part of sex-circus host. He introduces the
        burlesque and says, "We've got a great show for you this evening. We've
        got kids, animals, all kinds of shit." But, being MTV, this part is
        pretty chopped up, so it actually sounds like "We've got
        ki...animal...all kinds of shi...."

    o-- Thee Mighty Caesars, "Suck the Dog"
        [from the album "John Lennon's Corpse Revisited"]

        You know now baby you should suck the dog
        You know now baby you should suck the dog
        You know now baby you should suck the dog
        Come on now child, treat me like a dog
        Ow ow arrrooooo!

        get on your knees baby and suck the dog
        get on your knees baby and suck the dog
        get on your knees baby and suck the dog
        get on your knees baby and suck the dog
        Ow arrrrooooo!

        A suck the dog, a suck suck suck suck
        A suck the dog, a suck suck suck suck
        A suck the dog, a suck suck suck suck
        Come on now, come on now baby, suck the dog - you know you wanna!

        A suck the dog
        A suck the dog
        A suck the dog
        A suck the dog

    o-- Tone Loc, "Funky Cold Medina"

        This brother told me a secret on how to get more chicks
        Put a little Medina in your glass and the girls will come real quick
        It's better than any alcohol or aphrodisiac
        A couple of sips of this love potion and she'll be on your lap
        So I gave some to my dog, when he began to beg
        Then he licked his bowl and he looked at me
        And did the Wild Thing on my leg
        He used to scratch and bite me before he was much, much meaner
        But now all the poodles run to my house
        For the Funky cold Medina

        You know what I'm sayin'? I got every dog in my neighborhood
        Breakin'down my door,
        I got Spuds McKenzie, Alex from Stroh's
        They won't leave my dog alone with that Medina, pal

    o-- Lords of Acid, "Doggie Tom (Overture)"

        Every time I get naked
        My doggy sees it all
        He always gets excited
        Cos I'm his squeeky doll
        He's a horny little bastard
        He's drooling from his tongue
        I rub myself with candy
        Gonna lure him with a bone

        When I take him walking
        With his studded jacket on
        He's a macho little puppy
        I pet him for a job welldone
        He don't care much for bitches
        They ain't his cup of tea
        He loves his little pussy
        And that pussycat is me

        He's always feeling kinky
        Oh yes he loves to play these games
        On sundays he's my doggy
        On monday he's my slave
        I'm willing and I'm able
        To turn my baby on
        As long as he feels happy
        He can be whatever he wants

        Chorus:
        Tom Tom - poodle Tom - got a bone for a job welldone x3
        Tom Tom - doggie Tom - You make me come Tom

    o-- Emerson Lake & Palmer, "CarnEval #9" from Brain Salad Surgery

        And now a sight to make you drool
        7 virgins and a mule
        Keep it cool Keep it cool

    o-- Adam Sandler, "Teenage Love on the Phone" from They're all Gonna Laugh...

        At the end, the Buffoon says, "My neighbor's dog has a four-inch clit."

    o-- Adam Sandler, "My Little Chicken" from They're all Gonna Laugh at You

        This song is an ode to a man's love for a chicken. Lyrics include:
        "If an egg can fit in there, why can't I?" and "my little chicken likes
        to wear garter belts."

    o-- Adam Sandler, "She Comes Home to Me" from Stan and Judy's Kid

        Lyrics include: "She'll go down on a yak, lick a horse's nut sack" and
        do something to your asshole "with a mouse"

    =================================[B - ART]===================================

    1 - The performing arts
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    o-- Equus, by Peter Shaffer
        London stage, 1973
        ISBN 0233965432
        This play, which was later portrayed on the silver screen, is the story
        of a young man who is troubled by his love of a horse.  Told through the
        eyes of his shrink, it's representation of zoos is not top notch but is
        still a great read or a good way to kill a Sunday afternoon if it just
        so happens to wind up in your local playhouse.

    o-- "Rosa," written by Peter Greenway
        Although we're still hunting for someone who has heard or read this
        opera, I've been told by a very reliable source that it's about zoo-
        philia.  I'll be petitioning the New York Opera to put on a performance
        this season :)

    o-- "Futz; who do you want, Peire Vidal?", by Rochelle Owens
        Broadway stage, 1986
        ISBN 0881450405
        A play about a man's love for a pig.

    2 - On the silver screen
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    "I could dance with you until the cows come home.  On second thought, I'd
     rather dance with the cows."  Groucho Marx in "Duck Soup"

    "Because he only -talked- to the animals!"  Rex Harrison in "Dr. Doolittle"

    o-- Ace Ventura, Pet Detective
        Jim Carrey stars as a doggie detective in this 1994 comedy.  Zoo'ish
        eyebrow raisers include the line, "You really love animals, don't you?
        Only when it's cold enough." and various other hints.  IMNSHO, a kind
        of stupid movie but worth the watch for the zoo implications.

    o-- Four Weddings And A Funeral
        In this 1994 British comedy, Tom, a relative of main character played
        by Hugh Grant, confesses his love of a beautiful female Labrador
        Retriever late in the movie.  Also featured are plenty of 'Scotsman and
        Sheep' jokes throughout.  Ending credits feature wedding photos of
        Tom, the distant cousin who he marries, and the Labrador :)  An
        excellent movie, with or without the zoo references!

    o-- Jackson County Jail
        This 1970's action / adventure film features a clip in the beginning
        where our heiroine, a female ad. exec., is showing a clip of a
        commercial for a woman's sanitary napkin to a bunch of male CEOs.
        The commercial shows a woman riding a horse.  The head CEO says the
        commercial is blatantly sexual by noting, "We can't show that!  You
        know what they say about women and horses."

    o-- Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex, (But Were Afraid To Ask)
        [Review by Mal-Wolf (anon14fe@nyx.net)]
        In this popular Woody Allen comedy, Gene Wilder is a doctor
        who has one of his patients bring in a sheep who he is in love
        with.  Gene tells the patient that he should see a shrink, but
        the guy ignores him, saying that it's the sheep who needs the
        help ('cause she doesn't love him anymore) and that Gene has
        been recommended as 'the best doctor in the world'

        Gene relucantly accepts, and when the two of them are alone
        (Gene and the sheep) he starts to feel attracted to her...

        Eventually, Gene and the sheep run off together and have an
        affair, but Gene's wife eventually discovers this, and catches
        both of them in the act.  And the story ends with the original lover
        of the lamb finding her and taking her back to his home across
        the ocean, leaving Gene all alone in the world.

    o-- Terminator
        Though not exactly the movie I was expecting to have a zoo reference in
        it either, I was recently reminded of Sgt. Vokuvich's (played by Lance
        Hendrikson) statement to Lieutenant Traxler (played by Paul Winfield)
        while watching the police department shrink interview Kyle Rees, (played
        by Micheal Beihn), "That Silverman really cracks me up.  Last week he
        had some guy in here who was having sex with his Alsatian."  Unfortun-
        ately, Traxler was quick to shut him up before he could finish the
        story :)

    o-- Airplane!, The Movie
        "...you know what it means when Sparky rubs up against your leg?" asked
        the ever ambitious Captain Over, before coming down with fish poisoning.
        Oh, and don't forget the captain's wife in bed with the horse.  Remember,
        it's dangerous to smoke in bed, even if you're doing it after having sex
        with your horse.

        Similar bestiality humor exists in the sequal, "Airplane! II." One
        reader reports: "a woman propositions any male for a good time fearing
        she will die a virgin.  In one scene she propositions a mule.  In a
        subsequent scene, they are both shown smoking a cigarette.

    o-- Padre Padrone
        This is the story of a young boy growing up in Sicily, I think.
        Watch out for the "talking sheep."

    o-- A Zed and Two Noughts
        Director Peter Greenaway's classic study of death, decay and zebras.  The
        zoophilia references flow thick and fast and some are about as subtle as
        a baseball bat to the head :)

    o-- Mazeppa
        [Review written by The Boston Phoenix (newspaper)]
        You think *you* like horses?  Well, consider 19th-century French
        painter Theodore Gericault.  'Mazeppa' shows us the extremes of his
        equine passion: he sleeps with horses, helps them deliver foals,
        and sweats while he watches them mate, all the better to understand
        his subject . . . Gericault (Miguel Bose') becomes obsessed with
        horses . . . A troupe member relates to him the Ukrainian legend of
        Mazeppa, a young page who got caught up in a romance with his master's
        bride -- for which he was strapped naked to a horse and sent galloping
        to an unknown destination.  Gericault's parallel fate is thus rendered
        inevitable . . . The acting is flawless and the cinematography equally
        masterful.

    o-- We Think The World Of You
        The story of a love triangle between two gay men and a female German
        Shepherd.

    o-- The Nutty Professor (1996)
        At a night club, Buddy Love (Eddie Murphy) suggests that a stand-up
        comedian's prominent teeth resulted from an affair his mother had with
        Mr. Ed. He then acts out how that love-making session might have looked.

    o-- Willow
        This one is pretty tame by the standards listed here, but in this fantasy
        movie, a Brownie gets zapped by a love potion and falls in love with a
        cat. Since a Brownie is about the size of a mouse, this creates problems.

    o-- Top Secret
        This movia contains a great many bovine sex references, including the
        scene where two spies in a cow costume get jumped by a bull and then,
        later on, get, erm, 'suckled' by a calf.

    o-- Kentucky Fried Movie
        Various zoo and bestiality references.  One segment near the end shows
        cream pies thrust against various body parts (nude breasts and buttocks
        especially) and one of the last hits is against a horse's flank.

    o-- Bachelor Party
        Tom Hanks is on his last night as a free man.  His friends hire a
        stripper who will have sex with a donkey which they have kidnapped.
        Hanks intros her as a woman who doesn't believe love should be confined
        to one's own species.  She doesn't actually get naked, and all she
        does is shake her tits in the animal's muzzle before the donkey dies of
        a drug overdose.

    o-- Wayne's World
        While interviewing a guest on their TV show, they read their questions
        from cue cards. On the back of one of the cards (so the camera can see it
        but the guest can't) is the phrase "He blows goats: we have proof!"

    o-- Ladyhawke
        This film, starring Matthew Broderick, centers on the love of Navarre
        (Rutger Hauer) and Isabeau (Michelle Pfeiffer). An evil spell, however,
        has transformed them: Navarre is a man by day, but a wolf by night, and
        Isabeau is a hawk by day, and a woman by night. Only in the fleeting
        moments at dawn and dusk can they see each other as man and woman. While
        the film is not about zoophilia, it's highly symbolic of our devotion to
        our mates, though they may be another species: love knows no boundaries.

    o-- From Dusk 'Til Dawn
        In this movie, Cheech Marin invites characters to the "cantina from Hell"
        by saying words to the effect that "we got white pussy, black pussy,
        yellow pussy, dog pussy, horse pussy, chicken pussy...we got _every_ kind
        of pussy!" Too bad you have to end up dead or a demon, eh? :)

    o-- The Corsican Brothers
        In one scene in this movie, Cheech Marin has his arm up a horses ass.
        In another, he is having a conversation with a young girl bragging
        falsely about all the horses he has owned in the past, and the girl asks
        "have you done all the breeding yourself?"  Marin replys, "No I usually
        leave that up to the horses."

    o-- Mary Shelly's Frankenstein
        Not too many zoo references, but the letter from Victor should count:
        ...
        I've fallen in love.  She's dark, sleek and beautiful; and always wags
        her tail whenever she sees me.  Her name is Putzi and she's the
        friendliest sheepdog I've ever known!
        ...
        While Kenneth Branaugh left out just how well Victor 'knew' Putzi, we
        can always wonder...

    o-- Sucubus
        This highly thought of Swiss film contains a scene where a boy allows
        a cow to lick his genitalia, showing obvious pleasure.  In another
        scene, a woman/witch, the Sucubus of the title, is raped by a bull.
        The film is supposed to be a morality tale on the danger of
        fornication.

    o-- La Bete
        Walerian Borowckyz (a French director who featured animals in almost
        all of his films), created his masterpiece in 1975, causing a stir
        of publicity because of its shocking subject.  Ten years later,
        a survey by a French cinema magazine found that 'La Bete' was ranked
        in the top three erotic films of all time by six out of ten film
        directors.

        In the first scene of the film, some very explicit and detailed
        shots of two horses having sex end with a bearded, rather unkempt
        man rushing around after the stallion has pulled out so that he
        can watch the mare's wet sexual organs.

        This man is due to be married to an American woman who also has
        a fascination with horses mating, which is fortunate for her as
        these scenes appear regularly throughout the film.  The man is,
        in fact, cursed with some sort of lycanthropy, making him into a
        bestial sort of were-horse complete with a stallion's penis and
        testicles to match.

        The dramatic climax is a long and beautifully filmed chase through
        the woods, with encounters with the beast that rise in intimacy
        and semen content until he finally rapes her over a log.  But it
        appears that the monster did not reckon with a nymphomanical
        zoophile American, who demands of him such sexual exertions that
        he eventually dies.

        -- "BW" reports:

       "There was a beautiful scene in which the human heroine watched a
        mare being covered by a beautiful stallion. They were both dark
        brown or black. They looked like thoroughbreds. It had some
        beautiful closeups of the horses coming together. It was quite
        romantic. Anyway, that night the heroine is about to get changed
        to go to bed before is thinking about what she saw that day. Her
        bed is an old four poster wooden bed with carved bedknobs. She
        rode on the large rounded bed knob while fantasizing about the
        stallion and the mare. The scene was interspersed with shots of
        those beautiful horses mating. She came in a shuddering orgasm,
        of course."

        -- Doc Yak (9/27/97) reports:

       "The film mentioned on your 'TV and Movies' list as _La Bete_ by
        Walerian Borowckyz is available under the title BEAST from: VIDEO
        SEARCH OF MIAMI, Box 16-1917, Miami, FL 33116. Phone 888-279-9773;
        fax 305-598-5265. Their price is $25.00 plus $3.00 shipping. An age
        statement is required. They also require a one-time 'membership fee'
        of $10.00 with the first order. The horse scenes are quite good...
        perhaps a bit dark in the video, but well worth seeing. Other things
        worthy of note are the pictures in a book the heroine reads about
        the beast legend, possibly some of the paintings in the background
        (I couldn't get a good look at them) and the long 'beauty and the
        beast' dream sequence near the end of the picture. VIDEO SEARCH
        offers a huge selection of foreign films, but all they list is the
        title and a word or two about actor and director. I have the feeling
        that there is other material of interest here, if only one knew
        which titles to order!"

        -- Stitch (10/18/97) reports:

       "The movie is available in the States through some (possibly bootleg)
        video companies, but it is available in two versions. The American-
        dubbed version (sometimes called 'The Devil's Honey') features the
        horse copulation scenes, which are wonderfully explicit and quite
        artfully filmed, but is missing a good 15 minutes of footage toward
        the end. The complete version of this film is very, very zoo-ish.
        In it, the young woman falls asleep and has a prolonged dream
        sequence in which she is chased through the woods by a large, hairy
        beast that looks like a weasel crossed with a bear. The beast has a
        huge, erect penis, and it slowly tears off the womans clothes (and
        even masturbates into her powdered wig at one point). This is
        followed by a very graphic (XXX) bout of lovemaking between the
        beast and the woman, including a _lot_ of comeshots (I think they
        used potato soup or something). This is all accompanied by a really
        nifty harpsichord soundtrack. A sequel may be in the planning stages.

       "The director, Walerian Borowczyck, is quite an interesting character
        (he's rumored to have been in the beast costume). He did an animated
        feature called 'The Theater of Mr. and Madame Cabal' which features
        a few live action shots of two lions licking each other quite
        seductively. Another of his films, 'Immoral Tales', has a nice shot
        of two chickens copulating, as well as a weird shot of a young girl
        stroking a cow's udder."

        -- TruePuma (11/1/97) reports:

        Blockbuster Video should be able to order this video for $49.99.

    o-- Ars Armandi (l'Art D'Aimer)
        Another, more recent film from Walerian Borowczyk (1988), this film
        makes use of the same monumental Roman sets that were built in the
        fifties for "Ben Hur" and "Cleopatra".  It contains shots of
        women fondling a stallion's penis, and a vivid retelling of the
        story of Persiphea and the Bull.  Yes, a virgin climbs into an
        artifical cow and is 'serviced' by a the penis and testicles of
        a bull.  Full marks for getting this one past the censors almost
        everywhere except for Great Britain and the Irish Republic.

    o-- Padre Padrone
        This Italian film from 1977 is based on a best selling book; an
        autobiography of a young shepherd boy's struggle to escape the
        poverty of his peasant background.

        In various scenes, our young shepherd boy has sex with a donkey
        and, in a group of other teenagers, with live chickens.  There are
        also suggestive scenes of him sleeping next to a ewe.  The author
        of the book appears at the beginning of the film and reveals that he
        and many of his contemporaries were actively involved in animal sex
        throughout his teens.

    o-- Private Parts
        In one scene, where the camera crew is trying to convince a woman in a
        car to appear nude on film, she asks the crew why they have a donkey.
        The camera pans to a small male donkey who, unfortunately, doesn't get
        a starring role. :)

    o-- Police Academy [probably the first one]
        There is a scene in Police Academy that has a dog mounting a man's leg
        and humping it, around 19 minutes into the movie.

    o-- Loaded Weapon 1
        In this parody on the Lethal Weapon series, police officer Emilio Estevez
        tells his partner about his girlfriend Claire. His partner thinks Claire
        is a girl, but we discover she's actually a Golden Retriever. They have
        some tender scenes together.

    o-- "Easy Money" starring Rodney Dangerfield.
        I can't remember how far into the movie this is, but Rodney goes out onto
        his back porch (which is on the second story) and he looks down into the
        neighbors yard. There he sees an attractive (if you're into that sort of
        thing) woman, who is very scantily clad. The woman is lying on a lounge
        chair, or a blanket, next to a very large harlequin Dane. I'm not sure
        what sex the dog was, but the woman looked at Rodney like "you want to
        join in?"

    o-- Conan the Barbarian
        About half way through the movie, Conan and Subitie are walking down a
        sloping street in the second city they come to. As they go along they
        pass a prostitute, who they ignore {the real Conan would never do that
        BTW}, and continue to the bottom of the hill where they see a man having
        sex with a llama {full side view}. There's a lot of moaning on the part
        of the man but no hip action. They also see a group of young men
        surrounding a cow or a bull, I'm not sure which. Conan starts laughing
        at them, he bumps into a camel and punches it in the head, knocking it
        out. He and Subitie then run away.

    o-- Tierische Liebe [Austria, 1995, 120 minutes]
        It's a film. It's also a documentary. I saw it at the Vancouver Film
        Festival as "Animal Lovers."

    o-- Blazing Saddles
        I've only seen the televised version, so I may be missing some good
        stuff, but the gang of hoodlums who pillage the town is said to rape
        cattle.

    o-- Revenge of Billy the Kid
        In this monster movie, a drunken farmer has sex with his goat
        (offscreen). The goat gives birth to a mutated goat-man creature that
        runs around killing everybody. Kinda lame.

    o-- Pigsty (Il Porcile)
        This movie, by an Italian director named Pier Paolo Pasolini, is a
        political satire about capitalism, in which a rich man's son is a
        zoophile who often has sex with pigs. This is all offscreen, though
        there are several closeups of pig anuses.

    o-- Caligula (with Malcolm McDowell)
        The Quality Paperback Book Club sells this video for $59.95. To quote
        their description:

        "Caveat emptor: this infamous foray into feature film production from
        Penthouse publisher Bob Guccione includes highly explicit scenes of
        necrophilia, bestiality, rape and sadomasochism. Malcom McDowell stars
        with Peter O'Toole, Helen Mirren and Sir John Gielgud; the disavowed
        script is by Gore Vidal."

        The thumbnail of the jacket art reads "Special 30th(?) Anniversary
        Edition" (I can't read it clearly) and "Complete Unedited and Unrated
        Version."

    o-- Caligula 2
        This very bad Italian movie features an orgy scene in which a woman
        fondles a semi-erect horse penis for a few seconds. This is only in the
        uncut version.

    o-- Ricochet
        A guy is in the parole office at a parole hearing, and a guy on the board
        asks the criminal "What will YOU do for society when you leave here?" His
        response, "Well, I think I'll go to your house, first. I'll fuck your
        wife and your daughter. Then I'll fuck your dog. You'd like that,
        wouldn't you?" :) Something like that, anyways...

    o-- Chasing Amy (written and directed by Kevin Smith)
        One scene is when Banky and Holden are talking in the train station about
        the huge bag of smut books Banky is bringing with him for a two day trip.
        Banky explains that variety is the spice of life and that "sometimes, not
        often, but sometimes I like the idea of a chick with a horse." A few
        minutes later he is bonding with a young boy by describing what's
        happening in the magazine to him: "and then Black Beauty couldn't take it
        anymore, and he had to do some of his own mounting." That's it till later
        when Holden and Jay are discussing Alyssa's varied sex life. Comments by
        Jay include "One time she had this dog...." He is cut off by Holden
        before he can finish.

    o-- Rob Roy (with Liam Neeson)
        Roy is Scottish; need I say more? Numerous references to Scots and their
        supposed attraction to sheep.

    o-- Monty Python's "And Now For Something Completely Different"
        From what I recall, it features a sketch in which 2 friends go into one's
        apartment bedroom. A beautiful white doe goat is on the bed. One of the
        guys starts smooching the goat. After the other leaves, the guy and the
        goat smooch some more. When the goat walks away, a fleeting glimpse of
        the goat's posterior is seen.

        [Note: When this aired on A&E in May 1999, this scene was not shown. They
        also appear to have edited out some of the profanity.]

    o-- Revenge of the Nerds (Anthony Edwards, 1984)
        When Lewis and Gilbert go to the Alpha Betas for their frat initiation,
        they're handed a couple of unrolled condoms and directed to a sheep. You
        figure it out ;^)

    o-- Cabaret
        In the movie, the main character dances with a Gorilla (really!) and
        sings a song about love, and how he thinks she (the gorilla) is beautiful
        (and you would, too, if you could "see her through my eyes!").

    o-- Payback (1999, Mel Gibson)
        Three men in a car are waiting for Mel Gibson (who's in an apartment with
        an old girlfriend and her dog) to pick up the phone. When he doesn't
        answer right away, the guy in the back seat says, "He's probably fucking
        her." The driver (making the call) says, "He's taking long enough."
        "Maybe the dog, too," suggests the man in the back. After a thoughtful
        pause, the driver asks, "You think so?"

    o-- Passion in the Desert
        Based on the Honore' de Balzac novella, this story is about a French
        soldier dying of thirst in the Egyptian desert. While hiding in a cave,
        he runs into a female leopard (played by a male) with whom he gradually
        falls in love. There are some tender and suprisingly sexy scenes between
        the two of them. I recommend stopping the tape after he ties "her" leash
        to a stone column; the movie goes seriously downhill from there.

    o-- Take the Money and Run (1969, Woody Allen)
        Virgil Starkwell (Woody's character) describes a Rorschach ink blot as
        "two elephants making love to a men's glee club," and the third member
        of his bread-camera bank heist team is wanted for "marrying a horse."

    o-- South Park (1999, animated)
        Numerous bestiality references. Terrence and Phillip refer to each other
        as "pig fuckers," and two of the illustrated flash cards Cartman is shown
        depict "horse fucker" and "big floppy donkey dick." The illustrations
        will be rather small on a TV screen, though.

    o-- Orgasmo
        "A great movie (for people that like crass and rude jokes, i.e., South
        Park), done by the people who did South Park. There is a scene where Trey
        Parker is going to save his girlfriend from a German Shepherd guard dog,
        but instead of attacking, the dog mounts him! A very cute scene, and
        quite long--about a minute or more."

    o-- City Heat
        "In City Heat, a 1920s detective movie starring Burt Reynolds and Clint
        Eastwood, Burt puts on a wolf mask to search a brothel for a kidnapped
        socialite being held for ransom.  In the movie version, he opens one door
        and hears a horse whinny.  In the TV version, the whinny was edited out.
        The movie a very well made and humorous.

    3 - Glued to the tube
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

    o-- Cheers, "Back home in Indiana"
        Sam: "Okay -- I don't know about Indiana, but around here when guys get
        together to send another guy to his doom, things can get a little
        raunchy."   (Cliff snickers)

        Woody: (Seriously) "You fellas ever dress up farm animals in women's
        clothing?"

        Sam: (Does a double-take) "...No."

        Woody: (Smirking) "Well then, I'm one up on you."

    o-- Frasier, "Freres Heureux"
        Frasier's brother Niles was quoted in this episode as saying, "You
        wouldn't believe what this man does with eels."  while preparing some
        eels to eat.  His father, an ex-police officer, replied, "I put a guy
        in jail for that once."

    o-- Married with Children
        In the episode described as "Bud and the D'Arcys' neice hit it off," Bud
        manages to get rid of his parents long enough to study for a test. He is
        alone in the room with Buck, the dog. Dialogue is as follows:
        Bud: "Finally, peace and quiet. It's just you and me now, Buck boy."
        Buck (voice-over): "Uh oh, I've seen porno fims that start like this."

    o-- Are You Being Served? Again!
        In the episode described as "The staff copes with demanding tourists,"
        Mr. Moleturd says of the guests: "When are those Yanks leaving? That one
        guy sure is a goer, isn't he? I'll just go 'round and lock up the sheep!"

    o-- The Simpsons
        In the episode where Troy McClure marries Aunt Selma (for publicity
        reasons only), there are very prominent hints that Troy just isn't
        'normal'.  In one scene a minor character says, "He sleeps with the
        fishes.  I mean, he *really* sleeps with the..."

        "J" reports: "There is one episode in which Troy McClure talks about
        his love for dolphins. No need to look hard in this episode."

        "J" reports: "Groundskeeper Willy is a closeted zoo character. In the
        episode where Bart writes love letters to his teacher, he suggests that
        she go date groundskeeper Willy. She says, 'You don't even want to know
        what he is into.' In another episode, Willy wrestles an escaped wolf to
        the ground and wins. Willy gives the wolf, lies right down next to him,
        gives him some of his whiskey and says. 'Don't feel bad about losin'.
        I've been wrestling wolves before you were suckling your mother's teat.'
        Finally there is the episode where Bart gets Principal Skinner fired.
        Willy chases Santa's Little Helper through all sorts of ductwork. When
        he finally catches him he says, 'There's nary an animal alive that can
        outrun a greased Scotsman.'" [In that same episode, Bart later tells
        Skinner, "I'm real sorry about my dog getting you fired, and then biting
        you, and then getting it on with your leg." -- Actaeon]

        "J" reports: "In another episode, Thelma and Patty are seen riding naked
        on a horse in front of a crowd."

        In the episode where Bart and Lisa go to military school, they are
        cleaning a bronze statue of a horse and rider when they stop to talk for
        a moment. An upperclassman tells them, "Hey, get to work! I want to see
        my face in this horse's ass!"

    o-- MAD TV
        In an episode in which two women wake up in bed the morning after making
        love, one woman isn't sure she's really lesbian. She tells her partner,
        "I like penises. They make me smile." Her partner, a little miffed,
        replies, "Well, I suppose we could get a male dog."

        Also, in "Southpark-nuts," an animated parody combining "Peanuts" with
        "South Park," Snoopy sniffs Lucy's crotch and then humps her. [Thanks MZ]

    o-- Police Academy: The Series
        In an episode in which Shane gets hit on the head and thinks he's a dog,
        he humps his supervisor's leg and lifts his leg on a tree. Yeah, I know,
        it's symbolic, but what the hey.

    o-- King of the Hill (a sitcom on Fox)
        In the episode where Bobby goes to his first coed party, he learns to
        kiss by practicing on a plastic head. When his father takes the head
        away, Bobby finds a substitute. His mother catches him in the act,
        making smootchie faces at the dog and saying, "Come here, Ladybird,
        you're so pretty." She is not pleased. :)

        In the episode where Hank gets to swim with a captive male dolphin, the
        dolphin shows pink-belly when Hank innocently rubs the animal's stomach.
        Shortly thereafter, the aroused dolphin slams Hank against the tank wall
        and humps him for a short while; the dolphin is shown with a distinct
        slit, though not an erection. (I am told by another viewer, however,
        that the teaser commercial for the episode did show the penis, very
        briefly. I'll have to watch closer next time. :) Later in the episode,
        in order to teach an overly-amorous golfer that his attentions toward
        Hank's niece were unwelcome, Hank entices the man into the dolphin tank,
        then rubs the dolphin's stomach again. The animal gets pink-belly and,
        with sex on the brain, heads for the now-terrified golfer. The dolphin's
        trainer, seeing all this, laments quietly that he would like to be the
        object of the animal's attention.

    o-- Working Man? (the sitcom with Fred Savage)
        In the pilot episode, the boss offers his male golden retriever to Fred
        Savage for sex in a failed attempt at bribery.

    o-- Shock! TV (a series on HBO)
        "The newest episode [reported to me on 12/24/97] is about sex on the air -
        it seems in everywhere but the US and India erotic TV isn't considered as
        bad a thing as the censorship gurus in the US would make it seem. Anyway,
        they had two seperate zoo sequences... and they were both filmed with
        *real* movie cameras, if you can believe it! Now, the first one, a
        sporadic and really rather silly sequence with an emu raping some guy
        (something they apparently really DO) wasn't that great, but the second 35
        or 40 second clip, of a photographer from the Netherlands trying to get a
        model to masturbate a horse (maybe a pony - he was short and like I said
        it was a brief clip) was really quite amusing... she does, of course."

        [This episode was repeated on 5/27/99 as "Shock Video 5: Turn-On TV 1997"]

    o-- Jerry Springer (a daytime shock-talk show of debatable social merit)
        The episode airing the week of May 22, 1998 (it's syndicated, so the local
        air date may vary somewhat) concerned bestiality and zoophilia. A large
        percentage of affiliated stations refused to run this particular episode
        (cowardly twerps), so good luck finding a copy. It generated a great deal
        of publicity (nearly all bad): numerous other talk shows (e.g., Jay Leno
        and Comedy Central's Daily Show) and reporters (one of whom very
        objectively said "ick") had some "fun" with it, at our expense, of course.

    o-- The New Red Green Show (a Canadian show which occasionally airs on PBS)
        In "The Petting Zoo" episode, Red tries to set up a petting zoo. After a
        few failures, he decides to try it with horses. Nothing is ever seen, but
        Red later comments to the audience that anyone trying this at home should
        make sure the horses are geldings. There are a few PG-rated references to
        bestiality. Nothing exciting.

        Also, in the episode where they adopt a stretch of highway, Harold and Red
        narrowly escape being crushed by logs that fall from a log truck. Harold
        recalls, "I haven't had that much bark between my legs since Moose
        Thompson's rottweiler went into heat."

    o-- Saturday Night Live (NBC, 1998)
        Furlup reports: "[There is a] SNL commercial spoof [called] Canis....
        It's a spoof of a Cologne ad where a guy watches this Golden Retriever
        swimming in a pool. When the dog reaches the side, he lifts the dog out
        and hugs the dog to him, and they both start kissing. The guy is wearing
        only underwear and since it's Cologne, I'd assume the dog is male."

    o-- Fantasy Island (ABC, 11/8/1998)
        A stockbroker wanna-be visits the island and falls in love with a woman
        he meets by the sea. When she turns out to be a dolphin, he is at first
        disgusted. When the concierge can't understand his revulsion, the man
        asks, "You want me to have sex...with an animal?" and calls the idea
        "sick." However, by the end of the episode, the couple have reconciled.
        No human/dolphin contact is ever shown.

    o-- The Drew Carey Show
        "J" reports: In one episode, "Drew reveals that he had sex with the band
        teacher. Oswald's makes it sound like he lost his viginity to a dog. (He
        recanted)"

        In the episode "Boy Party/Girl Party," a co-worker hands Drew a business
        card for a club for "open-minded couples." Drew reads the card and says,
        "'No Pets.' That's a relief."

    o-- Kids in the Hall
        "DH" reports: "[There] is one skit where there are two young kids (a guy,
        and a girl with big braces (a guy in drag of course, this is Kids in the
        Hall :) ) are in the girl's parents' room. The girl goes into the bathroom
        to get dressed all slinkily, and the boy, very nervous, starts to look
        around the room. Sees the cross over the parents' bed, sees a family
        picture, I believe, then sees this big doberman (I believe...can't
        remember if it was intact or not). It then shifts to the bathroom door.
        The girl emerges, dressed in flimsy nightwear, and says 'Ohmigod...' and
        it shows the guy on his belly being humped by the dog."

    o-- Saturday Night Live:
        Dana Carvey (as the church lady) in "There's a fly in my soup."

        "So...I went to this restaurant from hell and ordered soup...and there was
        this teensy weensy little teeny tiny fly in my soup...and I said, 'Oooh...
        a fly in my soup...isn't that CON-VEEN-IENT!' I went up to the waiter and
        I said, 'My, my, my...a fly in my soup...a little beastiality buffet for
        the customers, hmmm? A little sin souffle', eh? Gee, I wonder who could
        have put that fly in my soup...hmm, I wonder...the chef, maybe?...No...the
        Campbell's Kids, perhaps. I wonder who could it possibly be...Oh, I don't
        know...maybe...SATAN!?!' So then I said, 'You look a bit nervous, Mr.
        Waiter... feeling the prickly heat in your bulbous tipping region? Hmmm?
        Why do you call yourself a 'waiter,' anyway? What exactly is it you're
        waiting for? Could it be, oh, I don't know...let's see...let me guess...
        oh...perhaps...SATAN!?! Isn't that special!' So I said a little prayer
        against the restaurant and did my little superiority dance like this...
        Hit it, Pearl!"
        (Music begins, he/she dances wildly off stage)

    o-- The PJ's: (a Foamation series on FOX, with the voice of Eddie Murphy)
        In the episode where Thurgood's stress medicine has the side effect of
        enhancing his libido, there's at least one scene where, after dinner, he
        gives his wife Muriel a sultry look and sweeps all the dishes off the
        table, implying that the table will be the location of some serious
        lovemaking. The episode closes with a little dog accidently swallowing
        one of the stress pills, then, after dinner with his owner, staring at
        her lasciviously and sweeping all the dishes off the table.

    3 - Animated Animals:
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

    o-- Locandez reports:
        "Dope Sheet" is an animation themed series on Channel 4; this week's
        program covered various forms of taboos, and for the second time, sex :P
        And there was a lot of zoo content.

        The very intro sequence shows a woman grabbing a wolf and yiffing him
        behind some bushes; then a man comes along and starts boinking the wolf.
        Judging by the style of the animation, I think it was by the same
        team/artist who draws Ren & Stimpy. There were a couple of short films
        about sex and sin which showed a bunch of cowboys all shagging horses in
        a stable; a brief snippet of an animation where a woman is receiving
        cunnilingus from a dog (and then later, is being fucked by the same dog,
        with a really long cock); and a cartoon character called 'Eveready Hardon'
        who is being seduced by a donkey (he leaps to try and mount it, but it
        moves away and he lands in some cactus ;). The earlier program showed what
        was to me a very yiffy animation of a mouse with a huge cock slowly
        penetrating a cat (you could virtually see the cat 'fill' up) and humping
        away, before disappearing with a 'help!' inside.

    o-- South Park (a series on the Comedy Channel)

        In "Chickenfucker," a crazed hippie running the bookmobile attempts to
        solve the sheriff's illiteracy problem by having sex with chickens and
        leaving written clues to follow.

        In "Chef Aid," the kids see a photo of Chef with a goat in his scrapbook
        of celebrities he has had sex with.

    =============================[C - CONTRIBUTORS]===============================

    Contributors to this PIP include:
       The Miami's (na????@anon.penet.fi)
       Hossie (hossie@irs.com)
       Beastboy (satyrs@netcom.com)
       Saranthyrr Thristovar'ren (na19653@anon.penet.fi)
       Snufferbux (na84518@anon.penet.fi)
       Dr. Doolittle (na53976@anon.penet.fi)
       Staysa (staysa@qnet.com)
       MegaDog (megadog@dogstar.win-uk.net)
       Redvane (redvane@demon.atheling.co.uk)
       Philo Therion (rnewland@netcom.com)
       Mal-Wolf (anon14fe@nyx.net)
       Kayotae Blackwolf (kayotae@phantom.com)
       Actaeon (actaeon@iname.com)
       na53019@anon.penet.fi
       GOAT (artgoat@ix.netcom.com)
       Lysander (lysander@vnet.net)
       Chimera (wolfg676@cyberspace.org)
       Kurt Goafec (na627797@anon.penet.fi)
       Snowwolf (be437@scn.org)
       Furtail (na687956@anon.penet.fi)
       Flypper
       Doc Yak
       Doggystyle
       Stitch
       TruePuma
       Meck
       Furlup

    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
          This text is posted when Actaeon gets a chance (not very often :).
          The FAQ and the PIPs for alt.sex.bestiality can also be found via:
             The Web at Stasya's Zeta Valley (http://www.stasya.av.org/)
                     Actaeon's website (http://come.to/actaeon)
                         E-mail at imazoo@dnx.net (Ima Zoo)
                        E-mail at actaeon@iname.com (Actaeon)
    =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=