    "Bonobo"
    ...a song parody by Actaeon

    (Sung to the tune of "Kokomo" by The Beach Boys. Completed 4/29/98.)

    In Kenya, they'll pen ya, for parodies of Enya
    Pakistani, Omani, don't mess around with Yanni
    Siberia, Sumeria, don't let the Beach Boys hear ya
    Sing this song....

    In the African trees
    Live some chimps called bonobo
    They make love to say hello; let's join the bonobo

    Tensions seldom rise
    With diplomats 'twixt all their thighs
    They do what their hearts advise
    And bring things down to sighs
    The sighs of bonobo

    From het'ro, to homo, let's see that one in slo-mo
    First fellatio, then lesbo, they're horny from the get-go
    With a finger he will linger, then start to cunniling her

    Oh, I wanna make love with a bonobo
    To make the vines swing to and fro
    Bask in the afterglow
    Of happy bonobo

    My style won't crimp if I sleep with a chimp

    I would like to see
    Some anthropoid perversity
    Their behavior may inspire me to bestiality

    Morning, noon and night
    Any time their love takes flight
    The research teams get quite a sight
    Then hold their partners tight
    And ape the bonobo

    Their tactics will vary, doggystyle to missionary
    In treetops, in bushes, he gets out and she pushes
    The way that they foutre, they re-wrote Kama Sutra

    Oh, I wanna spend the nights with bonobo
    And catch the natural acts on video
    Too bad the genes won't grow
    We'd make more bonobo

    My shrink must think I've fallen off the brink

    But we ought to know
    What it's like for bonobo
    Off to fight they'll never go
    They let their feelings show
    Three cheers for bonobo

    The fathers, the mothers, the sisters and the brothers
    The juniors, the seniors, and all the inbetweniors
    The neighbors, the cousins, they keep the forest buzzin'

    Oh, I got my knowledge watching nature shows
    I learned a lot from the dogs of war
    How far we really are
    Evolved from bonobo

    In Montana, they'll can ya, if you touch Santana
    Guyana, Botswana, don't plagiarize Nirvana
    Paraguayan or Malayan, they'll keep your band from playin'

    And Uganda-magine what they'll do in Kokomo

visits since 4/29/97

Index -- Updated Wednesday, April 29, 1998 -- E-mail Actaeon