Cologne, Germany
Oi!
Magdeburg, Germany
Right after we arrived we're on camera.
Oh...no!!
No... NO!! My favourite monitor!
*sobs* It was only 10 years old!
Hi there! I'm organizing things.
Yes, Cheetah can hear you!
*awowowowo*
*arororororo*
Hello!
What?
There is the cuteness!
...bounce...bounce...bounce...
Eurofurence is over. Have a nice day!
Alright, so...
Yea, we should take this as an opportunity to really party hard and...
bring all our love out to the city of Magdeburg
for one last time so that they can keep us in the best possible memory.
and uhm, yes.
I think, now that we know what is going on next year
we should seriously get going on with what is happening this time
Anything more you want to say about the new hotel?
Yea, just, if you are interested: We are not going to have to rise the prices very much,
and one big plus also: The breakfast will be included too.
One of our guests of honor, Mr. Andy Heath. Please come on stage with me!
Welcome! It's great to have you here.
I shall just sit down here, right next to you.
Andy, yes, he's actually the lead puppeteer of the BBC show "Mongrels"
And ehh... [PEOPLE CHEERING]
he has two colleagues and friends...
Iestyn Evans and uhm, I need to get the...
second name right: Warrick Brownlow-Pike
Unfortunately Iestyn is not gonna make it,
that's one of the things that happen if you invite freelancers,
there was a very very important job offer that he needed to take,
and of course we respect that because these guys are basically
coming for free in their non-existent spare time,
so thank you very much for doing that for us.
Thank you very much for having me over!
I'm just genuinely very thrilled to be here so.. thank you very much!
Thank you!
Yea from me as usual, some stats about the registration.
this year we have over 1400 attendees.
Everyone collecting for the charity will have a sticker on it,
you probably can't see it, it's too small
the official Eurofurence logo will be on it
so if someone come up to you...
Cheetah: BBF! Can you enhance it?
There we are.
So, how do you collect money from us?
Oh, oh! You!
That's not the right baseball bat! We have another baseball bat here...
there are two baseball bats now, one of them is a fursuiter
here is a clue: It's not the one that Titash is holding.
aand...
I'm afraid that they are gonna. Oi!
You guys!
Please don't use violence!
We believe in peace, love and prosperity. No violence!
Right. We promise you they will be
a lot more gentle and not hit you very hard
only slightly hard. But they'll be collecting money for the...
thank you! Thank you my minion!
to the bar!
On friday afternoon there is the fursuit parade
as every year we are changing the route.
As every year we are making it longer.
this year we are planning for 2 kilometers including the cathedral,
uhm, which is now open, finally.
we're also including the mall across the street. We're...
I have the right to talk longer...?
ok, I'll make it quick.
Some of you have missed this, most have not.
We had a second fursuit parade already before the opening,
I can see you on the tv screen!
Here, have a drink!
[TV TURNS OFF] Ahh, turn it on!
We rented buses, Kage you hear us? We rented buses to
carry our entire attendees to the zoo and back.
Also since you said somewhere, you are trying to have a bigger fursuit lounge than we have
you've seen the Estrel video?
bite me!
at the City Caree across the street. This makes us having three fursuit parades,
and I expect you to be there because I kinda sold your souls to the City Caree mall
who then volunteered to donate 500€ to our charity
Wildtierhilfe Fiel, if we show up with enough fursuiters, so you better dress up in your fursuit
and come, if you had one,
and come over and dance with us. So half an hour after this is finished,
I better make quick. We go over there and dance. They have drinks, music and they give us money.
And with that, I think
I can say, that Eurofurence is hereby officially opened!
Hello!
Welcome to Eurofurence 19
9...19?
Yes, welcome in Eurofurence 19.
We are here with no champaign...
and the glasses which is broken.
and we have Mr BBF here.
the biggest cameraman in all of Germany
because he is so big! that's gross
gross, too gross. Hello!
This is my new tie. This tie was given to me by EZwolf himself
I now have the official Room 366 necktie which I will wear every day at Eurofurence this year!
Nein! Oh I'm sorry. No!
What is "No" in Magyar? "Nem"
"nam"? "nem"!
Nam! Nam! Nam!
Hehehehe....
Hello!
American... German... American... ah shit.
German... American... German... American...
You get it? Yes!
Food... food... food... food...
I'm not Tsup. I look like Tsup but I'm not Tsup.
Ouch. You are awful. Stop destroying everything!
I'm teaching people how to twerk!
That's no cool, go away!
Merkel we are coming, to Berlin!
Ahh, why is there such a complicated contraption.... At least the light is not on.
I'd like to say that I wasn't actually coming here but the person behind the camera made me...
or made me not I'm so confused
40 hours!!
It'll better be good!
I have a beer
I speak German
WHERE IS YOUR PASSPORT?
Little cute lion. I'd love to take him to my room but he's too smart for that.
AAAH, oh hello!
Hello bright light! Am I dead? Am I going to heaven?
Oh hello. You know instead I'm not dead, it's YouTube, which might as well be the same thing.
Hello YouTube, uhm, just in case my boss is looking at this:
This is all photoshopped, none of this ever happened.
This man who is behind the camera is a genius at making
false videos!
Oh, it's BBF!
Ohh yea!
Welcome to my bar!
The drinks are free because they gone off a bit.
It doesn't...It doesn't...
I want a refund! No refund!
That's what everybody is always saying!
Not allowed! Here, have an umbrella
There you go!
Uhm, that doesn't look healthy anymore
Maybe not with the umbrella
but the green glowing liquid is good for you!
Yes, maybe if I want superpowers but...
It's all for the health and wellfare of all our
attendees, this is why you should have a delicious, nutritious shake!
once a day. It's EF shake!
and, all those rumours about the luckiest attendees, seriously, which have been
turned into a drink: No truth to that rumor at all.
This is all natural, made from... Eurofurence green, we all saw the opening ceremonies.
We know what this is made of.
Phew, don't give away all the secrets. No, there are no secrets.
No secrets whatsoever. This is all fresh and natural fruit!
That's whats in it! Fruit!
Dhary offered to.. you have one of these. See? See? Look!
He drinks these every day. See how... oh my... oh wow!
This is why is the security man, you see?
See? Me make force him to drink one of these every day
Force him to drink one!
Drink one of these every day and you'll be a proper furry.
Yes... that's all it takes. Health drinks
*mumbling*
I heard a rumour that a lady never can have enough handbags
Actually, that's right!
So I thought you might need this one!
Thank you so much! That gets a kiss!
Don't drink it all yourself! Oh I won't!
I'll even share it with him.
Ladies and gentlemen!
All the way from the United States of America
The man! The myth! The legend!
The roach travelling coach.
The intoxicated insect, he...
who runs on white whine and hates lengthy intros
Put you hands together
for...
Unnccclllleeee....
Kageeeeee....
Small correction: I don't fly coach!
We all know that.
I'd like to introduce a man who needs no introduction so I wont.
Mr. Fox Amoore, all the way from Scotland,
Scotland, yea
That's Scotland for ya
As you've heard I do come from the United States
Which is a wonderful wonderful country that lies somewhere off the coast of England.
Somewhere around the end of June, the beginning of July
is a horrific experience known to me as Anthrocon
That's when more than 5000 furries
all show up in Pittsburgh, and they all look to me and say:
We're going to have fun!
And if we don't, we're gonna blame you!
This as with every year
as the convention was getting ready
I got some volunteers together and we have equipment
in various places in the state of Pennsylvania
where Anthrocon is held
We have the equipment in places that requires me to get a very large truck
the size of the truck is about 6 or 7 meters. It's fairly big, but...
it's a truck that anyone can rent and drive and it doesn't require
any special licensing for a private person to rent this truck.
So I do the driving
So we loaded up the truck wit all of our equipment, and
We got on to the Pennsylvania turnpike
I... do you have those out here? Highways where you have to pay to use it? No?
Yes, it's all ok. Some people say yes, some say no.
Capitalism hasn't spread all the way across this continent yet. We're working on that.
So we paid our money
and waiting just beyond the booth where you pay your money
was a police officer.
Standing and watching me
And kinda bouncing on his heels. And as soon as the truck started up, he said:
And I said: "Uh oh!"
So I pulled the truck over
And he walked up.. I thought this was a check maybe to see
maybe there where drugs in the truck
and this is still very legal just as long as you are not physically drinking it.
which I at that time was not.
and he came up to the window
and he said:
Where are you going?
And now in every Americans mind
in our minds the answer is:
"Who the hell wants to know you Nazi piece of shit?"
"I got my rights and I'm not taking any crap from you!"
What came out of my mouth was: "Pittsburgh, Sir!"
And he said: "What are you carrying?"
I said: I have equipment for this amazing convention called Anthrocon
and we are going to have an artshow and wonderful things, and I got artshow panels and
this truck is just loaded to the gills and we're gonna get there
7 hours obeying the speed limit all the way.
And he said:
I'd like to see your commercial drivers license.
The license to drive a business truck.
And I said: Uh...
"Uh, heh. Here are the rental papers, look at the rental papers!"
And he said:
"Sir, you must have a business license to drive this truck!"
I said: "I don't understand, I'm just..."
"w...what?"
And he said: "You are moving business equipment."
"That means this is a business truck!"
"You must have a business license!"
I said: "Let me call the rental agency!"
So I called the rental agency very hurriedly
And I said. "There is a cop here who wants to see my business license. I don't know what to do!
"He's asking me things. I've been renting stuff for 10 years
and you never asked me for a license so what's going on?"
And the lady on the phone said: "Tell him you don't need one!"
"I don't need one!"
"Please step out of the truck Sir!"
So...
What could I do. They impounded the truck.
They would not allow the truck and all our equipment to move.
I had to call the rental agency
to come and bring a person with a business license to take the truck back...
and the people at the rental agency... well...
I wanted to talk to them
When I got there, they where very surprised. They looked up the rule
And they found out:
Yes, you do need a business license!
Well this really sucks for you!
So, how did we fix it?
I said:
"Write me another contract"
"Here is my number 2 volunteer. Put his name on it"
And the volunteer looked at me and said: "What?" I said: "You are driving!"
He said "But I don't have a business license!" I said:
"We don't need a business license. We're just moving grandma Kage's stuff from the barn out
to her house in Pittsburgh, aren't we?"
Because, I wanted to get this stuff out to Pittsburgh
in time to set it up so all those wonderful people would be able to have a
good time. We didn't want to let them down.
Especially, especially my dear friends
from Germany; Nightfox, Tani, Cheetah, all you wonderful guys. They come to Anthrocon
to kind of have one last bit of enjoyment before THIS happens
Now nearby there was a new, we call it a "urgent care clinic"
or the Doc-in-a-box for some people.
that goes over great in english. It doesn't really translate so I'm sorry. But...
It was in an old stone farmhouse
old by "our" standard
now it was American old
Yea I know, I know. You know the old saying:
"In America 100 years are long, in Germany 100 Miles is a long way"
I go that far to get gasoline!
at much cheaper than you spend but anyway:
sorry! So I went to this giant old stone house
and, it didn't help the atmosphere
in this stone house that as I arrived a thunderstorm started
and there was lightning and there was thunder. And I went inside
and I sat down. And I was told "Wait here, the doctor will see you shortly!"
I expected Dr. Frankenstein to walk in
it was not Dr. Frankenstein who walked in, it was Igor!
[LAUGHS]
"How are you today Mr. Conway?"
"What brings you to my laborato.... ehhh, office?"
And I said: "This!", and he said: "uuuuhhhhuuhuhh"
"That's a nasty burn you have Mr. Conway!"
"We're going to have to get that old, dead skin off! Let me just get this wire brush..."
Ouw!
"That should be quite well Mr. Conway. I put a bandage on there and"
"Call me if you see any pus coming from it. Good day!"
The funny part is they think I'm making this up!
All this modern technology just pisses me off.
I have one of these smartass phones you kids like to use so much
I left mine backstage 'cus I don't want people to interrupt me!
The last thing I wanted is be sitting here, telling a story and then all of a sudden...
So I be telling a story and all of a sudden...
Oh I left it backstage. Sorry, I forgot, haha, anyway...
I never wanted the thing
I had a goold ol' fashioned phone
A flip phone. Remember that was the Star Trek communicator? Kirk to Enterprise? Those?
And what did it do? It made PHONE CALLS!
That's all it did, that's all I wanted it to do.
I have a friend though, he...
is from Asia. Specifically Singapore...
He also works for Microsoft
He always teased me. He said:
"You need to upgrade your phone!", I said: "I don't want to upgrade my phone!"
It does what I want it to do, it makes phone calls and that's it!
So one fateful day...
he was visiting me....
and we went out shopping for some Christmas presents
For our families. And we went to a shopping mall...
Classic American shopping mall...
and Simon said to me, as innocent as he could be:
"Let me see your phone!"
So I said: "Here!"
And he grabbed it and took off running
Ehhhm...
Ehhh...
Aehm...
What do you call...
Chinese guy just took your phone...
What is he doing with it?
And I saw him duck into a phone store
Ohhh nrgg. Jib jib...
Where is my pen? Ahh!
Aeeh, hey you! Go...
Go tell the legs to.. you know? Run or something!
So I ran after him after several minutes of pondering
Ran into this phone store as quick as my poor old legs could carry me
by the time I got there he had slapped my phone down and said "Quick! Upgrade this!"
so what do I have, I got one of these...what do you call it?...Androgynous phone
kinda new fangled piece of crap.
I actually play this piano the first time this convention.
Remember there is a charity box over there so if you like...
Does anybody know The Beatles?
Ok everybody: Test shots are done, now we are getting hot!
Give me a countdown!
10 ...
9 ...
8 ...
7 ...
6 ...
5 ...
4 ...
3 ...
2 ...
1 ...
WOOOHOOOOO
Nice, and now: Why are you waiting guys. I wanna see your hands!
Allright, got it! Thank you!
You seem to feel better now!
Food! FOOOD!!!!
Big burger... EF burger, NOOO!
Nooo!
Awwww....
NO!
I have nothing to hide!
Just 2 big buns!
Big bunnies!
Omnomnomnomnom....
Stop filming me!
Where is Pinky? So we can do this in stereo
Oh Gertrud, you are mine... you are...
mine for tonight.
You are mine for tonight!
My new girlfriend.
*bsssshhhhhhhh*
Because the googly eyes are watching me!
But they are cool!
All the eyes!!
Ok, I confess: Sheppy knocked over the glass
and Sheppy dropped the glass on the floor.
I was there. And he tries to cover it up!
No, wait wait wait. That was a cat...
....shit!
Believe me. He did it! Believe me!
Look into my eyes!
...organized. Oh god
This highly confidential!
This is Room 366 talk. You should not be hearing this!
So I can just muffle your microphone and...